Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-11-26
TEA-TABLE SALAD.

-S0nlerUttte Journal.
TEA-TABLE SALAD.
"a ANY y, what do you think of my
well, Sue, think if you'd break it
into proper lengths you would have
quite a lot of merchantable files to sell y
Judge.
SUBTLE doesn't look like a literary
man, yet he told me he made his living
by his pen" He-''He does; he's q
pork raiser from Illinois. "-IIqer.
The average country newspaper
comes out in new dress about as
seldom as the editors wife.-Bino-
hdnton Republican.
1T gives me great pleasure to know
that you are under my roof" said the
stylish hostess affably to the poor re-
latlon when she assigned him room in
the attlc.-Bolinaore american.
A POCKET in vein Of quartz in the
Black Hills in two days yielded So, OO0in
gold. Such pocket would be very de-
slrable in winter overcoat, but the
tailors don't seem to be in the right
vein.-LoaVeH Courier.
No, Matilda, felines don't 90 rowing
in cat-boats; they row on back fences
Etmird Gazette.
MANY soldier who lacked much of
being saint has been cannonized.-
Buffalo Express.
'tHow do 1 strike you ?" said the
artificial limb to it's mate. "You're a
corker,' ,; was the reply Washington
Star.
Two CLEVER PEoPLE.-She-"Am I
not clever, dear? | have lust given the
porter Is cents not to light the lamps
when we go through the tunnel" He
Yes, dear. Butt had already given
him SO cents for the same thing
BrooFIy,a Life.
WE have noticed that the cheaper the
trousers young man has on, the more
fur he puts on the collar and cuffs of his
DECENTRALIZATION Globe.
In CHARGE OF HIS UNCLE.-"What did
you get for your birthday ?' ga watch
chain" "Where is it? Let's see it."
Cant. It's with tie watch. "-Hor-
card Lampo0n.
BIGGs-"I'm glad to hear you playing
some new pieces this year." Bags
"No; they're the same ones | played
last year, only I've had my piano
tuned. ''-HarUdrd Ldmpoon.
He came to see her stormy nights,
When he had nowhere else to go;
She liked to see him at such times,
And so she called him her rain beau.
-NeO York Herald.
SHE-"Ah, Jack, I'm afraid I'll make
YOU sorry wife" He-"I've no
doubt. Anyone who marries me will
be sorry. - Colorado Sun.
EXCITED MESSENGER BoY-"Doctor, 0
Doctor! Dey wants you right away at
de musee. De ossifed mans been eat
in some apples, and dey've tied him all
up in bone knot. Indianapolis Jour-
nal.
Nor QUESTION OF RHEroRIc.-"I
don't mind doing away with TIE edl-
torial we, said Editor Cutting, "but
when a fellow comes into the office with
a club and tries to abolish the editorial
eye, it is very different matter. Dos
ton Post.
GUIDE pointing to mummy)-"This
was Rene, the priest, the wisest man of
his time. He lived to a great age"
Tourist-''Was his last illness fatal ?''
eyes, very fatal" "What wonderful
thing that we see him now permanently
cured. Pharmaceutical Era.
FIRST TRAMP-"If had my way I'd
have 365 national holidays in the year. ,
Second Tramp-"Y would, Ell? And
then there would be one working day
every four years. Oh, you are nice
one, you are You would make gal
lev slave of the poor laboring man,
wouldn't you ?"-1eras SJtjrgs.
physician, heel thyself,' is perhaps
the most supererogatory injunction that
ever issued from mortal lips.-Btng-
hdnaton Leader
The artist who is away up in art
doesn't like to see his pictures at the
exhibition in similar position. IonE-
ers Statesman,
THERE may be safety in numbers, but 1t
does not seem so to the young man VINO
in engaged to eight girls at once'-oon'er-
uil1e Journal.
AN IDEAL -She-"The man |
marry must be handsome, brave and
clever" He-"How fortunate we nave
met !''--,Smiths Monthly.
"GooDNEss, john How queer the
baby looks. l believe he's going TO
have a fit" "By George | believe
YOU are right. Where's my cameraT
81 DON'T like the figure OF that
carpet" said the wife, as she lookea al
the floor. "Neither do l. SAID the
husband, as he looked at the blll.-bo''t-
more Anlerlcda.
Mrs, BRowN.-''T'm afraid to let you
have bicycle" Little johnnie e =
Don't feel that way, Ma. Even II II, It
did xiii me, remember that it would ), be
the last thing ever asked you Tor.
Epoch.
OF all sad words of tongue or PEN
which thro' my weak mind fit,
None are so sad, to me, think.
As these two-"Plcase remit
" The CTub.
THE RACE TO THE SWIFT did you run
for Office the other day % asked sprlg-
Gins of defeated candidate. No. No.
said the candidate sadly; Il Walked'
the other fellow ran. "-Someroa'le Jour
nal. NJ co,oI1,s noams