The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1891-12-26

and happiness in the bosom of its
noble ruler, whose enlightened reign
like her mother's-although ham,
! pered by the religious and social Gus
toms of the East, has been an era of
civilization and progress which no
European nation can equal.
What Most Men Think of women.
That women hate three-fourths of
their own sex.
That women are charming in pro-
portion to their amiability.
That a woman who sneerS at the
downfall of a sister is not a saint her
self.
That a woman who f1irts on the
street or street cars is either silly, in
sane or lot respectable.
That a woman should know how
to cook, whether she has any imme-
diate need for the accomplishment or
not.
That the women who b~londines
her hair unconsciously weaves much
of her life history in the golden
meshes for all men to read.
That the ways of that woman are
past finding out who rails against the
male sex for chewing ten cent plugs of
tobacco and expectorating on the side
walk, yet who goes herself and delib-
erately wipes up that same sidewalk
with a $25 or $50 gown that her father
or husband earned by the sweat of his
brow.-Albany Sun.
Showing OFF Ones Points.
The girl is unlucky who finds out
suddenly that she has something nice
the matter with her, says a writer in
the Philadelphia Press.
l knew one who learned that she
had lovely hair. She took to doing it
up with one hairpip, and she used to
look like a mop on the third day OF a
houseclean ing.
She took to jerking her head, too,
and then she did look lovely, especi-
asly if it happened at the theatre, at
luncheon or in the cars.
She would waggle her head SO that
her words would come out scalloped,
and her uoze got all spread around.
A girl with a neat foot is the worse
nuisance l know. She always has it
stuck out in the car. Her shoestring
is always coming undone. She is for
ever lifting her dress and making you
nervous.
1t Just spoils a girl if she finds out
that she has fine eyes and pretty teeth.
Goodby to quiet expression at once.
Her eyes roll, droop, snap. shut, open,
dance and sparkle all over the place
till YOU wonder why they don't get
sprained.
Meanwhile, her teeth are working
Just as hard. She smiles twice a min
ute, and often her eyes are getting in
some fine touches that don't go with
q smile at all. The effect is awful. l
got so tired looking at a girl the other
day that l wondered why the man
with her didn't marry her just for the
sake of tying her fast to her nose and
knocking her teeth out.
As for me-, give me a girl who knows
she is homely or n who is so good
looking that she doesn't care.
A Theoretical Cook.
1t is sincerely to be hoped that the
Boston transcripts satire on cooking
schools is not correct, although theory
and practice are, as a rule, widely diff
ferent in their results
Father:-"As You have had three
terms at the cooking school, Jane, l
suppose you'd know how to roast a
piece of beef better than that. Why,
it's burned to a crisp"
Daughter:-"I don't see how Pm to
blame. The fire was too hot, l sup
pose"
Father:-"And why didn't you look
out that the fire wasn't too hot?'
Daughter:-''The man always at
tended to that at the school, and Mrs.
Mixer used to do the basting. All we
did was to do the tasting after the
meat was cooked" q
'Trotting'' the Baby.
The practice of "rrotting" q child
on the knee of the nurse or the mother,
though it has the sanction of long
practice, has not the sanction of COM
mon sense, and should never be in
dulged, especially with infants, says
Good Housekeeping. Treating the
adult body in the ratio OF correspond
ing strength, the exercise would be
about equivalent to being ourselves
churned up and down or the walking
beam of a good sized steam engine. 1t
has been very properly said that
gentle movement is as pleasant to
the child as riding in an easily run
ming carriage on a smooth o to an
adult; knee jolting is as unpleasant
and harmful as a journey over the
worst corduroy roads,"
Queen Victoria's Memorial Trees.
{ In the private gardens of the palace
at Osborne, on the Isle of Wight,
where only, it is said, can Queen Vic
toria plant and cut and arrange as
she pleases, without consulting the
officers of the Crown, she has a long
array Of memorial trees commemorate
ing events which have occurred IN her
family circle. In n spot stands a
row set out in February, 1862, when
each family dedicated a tree to the
memory of Prince Albert, who had
died during the preceding December,
the one which the Queen herself
planted being a pine tree. In another
Is a group, each of which records the
Dyspepsia