Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1891-02-13
PITH AND POINT.

PITH AND POINT.
Makes tho mouth wator--Thin soup.
Held for trial--A session of the police
court
Tcacher-"Dcnne quartz Nlilkman'a
Son 0bscntly)--"Pint and a half"
Tho crow docs not fly from n cornfeld
without caws.-- Washington Star.
az am over hcnd and cars in work."
aaid tho submarine diver to himself.
Love mover Inns to DO watched to SEQ
TINT 1t does full days work. -Lealoillo
Dispatch.
Tho horse knows moro than any other
animal about wheel and whoa Ytno-
soino's Neies.
There aro great many things that go
without saying, but woman is not ono OF
thom.-,St, Joseph Ne,cs.
Economy is wealth; but 1t is kind Of
wealth that tho rich man finds 1t hard to
transfer to his son.--Puck.
An Iowa man named his boy Twice,
70 that lightning wouldn't strike him iii
tho same spot. --1aras SJtiggs
It would Soon that tho proper place to
cook mountain game would be ON o.,
mountain rangc.-zsras Sittings.
Never mako lovo In eornhcld. Re-
member that corn has cars and is
easily shocked. -Kinaerhoos Rough Notes.
When q burglar asks you the connun-
drum, "Whero's your money2n it is
visor to give 1t up.-Binghantvs Rlpuls
licun.
"a compositor "sots up" for his wife,
and tho vito ought to DO willing to
Bit up for him, even II no is out late.--,
Statesman.
1t must DO admitted that whcna deaf
man marrlcs dumb woman, the arrange
mcnts for happy married life are rather
ovcrdonc.-Lye.
"Thc Gar never rides in n carriage
now" "Whyi'' sIIc has discovered d
revolutionary tendency in tho wheels. -
Detroit Nrso Press.
Tho farmers say thoro is an abundant
crop Of pears this year. Wo trust that
the clefsfsnisi, will DO ablo to shy tho
samc.-LomeN Courier.
'I'yc caught cold twice this week.
remarked detective. "You always were
q lucky fellow" said one OF his fellow
olllccrs.- D{lshingtoa Post,
"a man sat down On a foFhpss .gesti
Quicl, his form uprose md fell, : y s.--,
Itrose Ikea shot, but IL didn,trisp
One-half rs high as his yell.
-Phiiadelpi.ia Times.
Mrs. Gusher--"O doctor, how should
hate to be buticd alivol" Doctor
"Calm yourself, madame. No patient Of
mine need fcar that fatc."--Munseys
Weekly.
'Tls contradictory In terms
IT'S curious how words group
Yet homnn 'iwho Isn't IN IT.
Is always "in tho soup"
San Francisco Bulictia.
Art must always get its inspirations
from nature. Tho zebra gave us our
first idea OF striped clothing, and the ell
ephant WINS tho inventor of loose trou-
sers.-Pucb.
sit is strange, tho ties TINT attach us
to disagreeable things ut times" as the
dog said to the tin can sequel. "Still,
In ones life such things arc bound to
cur. Philadelphia Times.
Striyeas we may, we never can
-, Toll who are happy, who forlorn;
tne cuteat Iltble 6nOe OF tan
May hide very painful corn.
Chicago Post.
Mrs. Rafferty, Cooking at camel)--
~ tell yez, Dinnis, the way they ill-trate
these animiles is somethin' awful. They
must have bate this poor harso pretty
nigh to death to raise such q lump on his
back."-- Munssy's Weekly.
Mrs. Brown-"Yo on don't seem to havo
very high opinion of your husbands
ability" Mrs. Malaprop-"No he's a
very ignorant man. Last night no spoke
of persons acting III concert when he
should have known they only sang ct
such entertainments" --Epoch.
High Priced Doctor-''-You are now
convalescent and all you need is exer-
ciso. You should walk ten, twenty,
thirty miles day, sir, but your walking
should have an object" Patient--seAll
right, doctor. I'll travel around trying
to borrow enough to pay your bill. -
Ne,O York Weekly.
However calmn man may be,
And temperate in writing,
Though he ba led quite easily
In matter he's inditing; (.
Although he be polite to man
As scholar at the Hub born,
Still IL he uses G pen,
bis written thoughts are stubborn.
- !itinseJs Weekly.
"Pcrhaps," said the fresh young man
as he pumped himself down on the sofa A
between two giddy girls, perhaps you
were discussing some choice secreta"
cob, no, said one of them. 81 was just
saying to Minnie that nothing should
separate us, but really I didn't expect it
SO soon. Aud the beating of his own
heart was the only sound he heard. -
2si.a laats Esslsss. &