The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1891-01-24

y 4
James, l am not quite as bad as
that.n
." am sure Of ib, love-" James an
swered, thinking how charming she
looked with the tears starting into
her child-ilSe blue eyes, and that
wisttul, aggrieved expression on
/ her face as she made the appeal and
his little lecture was quite over for
that evening, nor did the occasion of
it recur again to his mind.
But that night, as he walked home
, under the stars, their converse tion
came back TO his memory, and he was
conscious of vague, undefinable feel
ing of dissatisfaction, a longing for
something he was not quite suro of
having obtained. He had been
brought up with very prudent, sensi-
bic ideas in regard to money, and
though he was the most generous
hearted man in the world when Occa-
sion required, he never INDUCED in
wilful waste, or threw away shilling
simply for the pleasure of throwing It
away. But it was not the knowledge
of the difference of Mary's ideas on
the subject, or the thought that she
might expect too much from him when
they were married that troubled him
now. He knew he had ample means
of satisfying her wants, and was not
afraid of ever giving her cause to re-
prOach him for depriving her Of any
thing to which she had heretofore
been accustomed.
But her answer to his question,
And so you could not marry a poor
man ?' REQUIRED to him perpetually,
with a sense of pain, for it seemed
somehow to lessen the value Of his
love for her, and to put it aside, as of
minor Importance in comparison with
his wealth.
1t was true, he had not asked her,
"WOuld you have been willing to
marry me if had been poor man ?'
but would not her answer in that case
have been Just the same? Was her
affection for him as pure, as deep, as
his for her; or was her gay heart more
shallow and frivolous than he liked to
think? Could he look forward to
having her true, womanly helpmeeb
to Journey with him through life, or
was she a mere brilliant butterfly,
fitted only for sunshine and summer
hours
Musing thus, in not very cheerful
frame Of mind, he arrived at last at
his lodging. On the table in his room
he found a note, containing only the
following brief notice:
You are wanted at the Office with
out delay. News of Importance to
communicated
Marvelling much at this summons,
which was from one of his partners
in business, James Immediately re-
paired to his office, where news OF a
most distressing character awaited
him.
Intelligence had been received of
the failure Of a large speculation; a
bubble had burst, and the firm, OF
which be WIS member among several
others, was totally ruined Even his
own private fortune would probably
be swallowed up in assisting to pay
the claims against them.
The blow was almost too stunning
a one for him to realize at first.
After long and perpleXed CONSUL
tation, he hastened home in the chill
gray dawn of morning, haggard-
looking and miserable man. IL was
not for himself he grieved; he could
have borne the blow bravely, for he
was young and strong, full of energy
and hope, and in a few years at most
he knew he could again work his way
up. But Mary-his betrothed How
could he expect her to wait on him so
long? He felt too surely that all
must now be at an end between them;
every sentiment of duty and honor
required that he should at once re-
lease her from her promise, and bring
their engagement to close.
How dark the future looked, when
all had been so bright few hours
before
He reached his lodgings, and,
throwing himself on a sofa, buried his
face in his hands. Long he brooded
over his sorrow, powerless to act in
any way.
At last, with a great effort, he
reused himself.
"This is mere folly I" he exclaimed.
What is the use of delaying what
has to be done. Let me be a man
I cannot see Mary-I could not bear it
lust yet but l can write to her, and
I'll do it at once"
He drew little table, with pen,
ink and paper, towards HIM, and after
sumo elaboration, wrote the following
| lines
My Own Mary: For 1 must call
you so oEce more, though for the last
time-when we parted last night l was
a rich and prosperous man; to-day
am ruined. Our firm has failed, and
have nothing in the world that can
call my own.
"Under these circumstances, there
Is but one course. left me to pursue,
| and that is to give you up. / well
know that you could not share a life
of poverty and toil-indoed, / would
not ask it. It nearly breaks my heart
to write these words. / love you
more than can express, more perhaps
| than you will ever comprehend. But
| enough of this all is over now, and
| why dwell on thoughts like these ?
Our brief engagement is at an end
but you viii still permit me-will you
not ?-to cherish its memory as
| bright and beautiful dream, which
! shed over my life halo of the purest
happiness / have ever enjoyed.
Farewell, bless YOU, my lost love
May you be happy in whatever path
of life you are called to walk, is the
fervent, heartfelt prayer Of one who
can now only sign himself your
friend, j. NJ
James read this note over, and was
not satisfied with it, it seemed too
lowery, too elaborate. He had meant
to be calm and concise, keeping his
own feelings in the background, in
stead of obtruding them selfshly upon
her. But as it was written he would
let it stand. He had a wretched head
ache, and a second attempt would
probably be worse than the first. So
he carried it TO the nearest letter-box,
dropped il in with a feeling as if he
were buTying a friend, and then re-
turned home to indulge at leisure in
his melancholy reflections, for he
really felt too i'll to make the exertion
Of going down TO the office, before Che
afternoon, at any rate.
How changed everything seemed I
A dull, dead blank was around him,
a weight on his heart that felt as If
It could never be lifted again all was
dark where il had been sunshine a
few hours before. a few hours It