Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1891-08-10


left early. They paid their oarn bills.
The clerk took their word for what was
theirs and what was not.
When Mrs. Stanley came to leave she
found of course wine she did not order,
and had 20 pay for backing the boots
of this keen critic of American manners
and cookery this able savant of British
cold victuals, this bright young hybrid
whose surprised and delighted third
stomach was tossed across the troubled
deep within the year now only half
gone by.
That is the reason why Mrs. Tenant
afterward spoke SO bitterly Of her bill at
the Vendome. Her guest had done her
up" as We say here in America, especially
among the lower classes, if one may
speak in that way here, and think one
may if one pays ones bills
Hamilton suffered most severely in
the west, He found no congenial society
there, all the Englishmen of his stripe
having been hanged on their arrival, or
on most anything else in fact that came
handy in a prairie country where tim Der
is rare and hard to get hold of
He bears down especially hard on Col
orado Springs and Denver, two of the
most delightful cities in the world, for |
know, having visited Paris. London and
East Saginaw within the past two years.
paying my hotel bills and either black
ing my own boots or gladly putting up
for ii.
l call the attention of every crowned
head in Europe to the fact that while at
their tables did not ask what was COM
ing next or what their victuals cost
them laid down. | am not regarded as
a stickler for social high church or mon
key business when l make formal cali
on monarch or P. P G. call on roy
atty, but when cease to pay for the pol
ish that glints and glitters on my bright
young bunions, or fork over my liquor
bills for a W. c. T. Z. to put up for,
may my right hand cleave to the roof of
my mouth, and an incensed people play
shinney DER my forgotten grave.
Mr.. Aide did not like the surprise
party" of the rancho out west. He viii
ike it less the next time he is invited.
Western people are informal, but their
hearts are warm. They are hospitable
TO degree that would naturally sur
prise and unman a real man for the mo-
ment. 1t would not affect Mr.. Aide es-
pecially. however.
But the west hates 10 have an hOnOred
guest walk on its wishbone with Mexi-
can spurs. 1t feels hurt and resents It
| have lived nearly all my life in the
west, and ! say without fear of Success
sul contradiction that any mani do
not refer now to Mr.. ATde-who has
been the guest Of the west, and who then
seeks to earn eight dollars and forty-five
cents by running down his host, is not
only cad and triumphant ass, but he
is unworthy in every possible way ON
earth. and totally Disappointing except
in the way OF stimulation to a tardy to-
mato crop.
After being a guest in the American
"parlour" he turns to and seeks to be-
mlre and besmirch, by satire and such
things, the furniture and decorations Of
his illguided hostess, whose error was in
not showing him to the sly and letting
him look over the album.
Possibly may be charged with speak
L,
only my own opinion. l do not hold the
paper responsible, and if Mr.. Aide does
not like 1t he may readily reach me by
post.
tie says We pronounce vase as we do
gaze. This is not true. have not pro-
nounced 1t that way now for over year.
Mr.. AIDE Is too severe on Us. He saw
our beautiful scenery whenever the rail
roads gave him passes, and he was en-
tertained by those who had never seen
that kind Of fauna before, and he went
home and tried TO make a Rudyard Kip
hing of himself, thinking that he was
critic when il was really colo that allied
him.
He did not like 1t because our ladies
did not allow him to see them work.
This was in Difference TO him, for no one
ever saw hlm work. He SAYS ne pre-
sunes that ladies here do secretly work,
but he missed the pleasant litter Of EN-
ployment.
If he will come among us again at
some time In the future he will probably
notice the pleasant litter of employment
and he viii furnish the most of it himself.
Afterward a detected Englishman may
be seen going home with his pancreas in
the morning paper.
He did not like our theaters; especially
those. judge, who did not remember
him at the door, and who did not feel
like giving him box because he con-
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