Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-04-23

ICu IAN W nave our lOTtuHc ttIu OY the
only surviving prophet"
1.-The prophet agsinp' cried l. Now for
it,"
Annie clutched my arm and tried to pull
me away, but I refused to depart
My dear" said /, "a dime museum is a
very vulgar show, but I intend to inter
view that prophet and tell him my opinion
of him, and shall be obliged to take you in
with me-"
As I spoke stalked through the door.
and, having bought my ticket, made my
way directly to the curtained archway over
which l saw the words:
'The prophets cave. Mr.. Mesrom is the
only prophet yet alive"
''AhI'' | said as read this, land it is very
probable that in little while the world
Will be entirely destitute of prophets. /
intend to finish off this one"
As expected, Mr.. Mesrom was our old
| original prophet-white wig, beard, robe,
baskets, paroquet and all as before. Two
young people were just departing with
their envelopes in their hands, and we had
the place to ourselves. walked up to the
counter, and, fixing a stern gaze upon the
prophet, said, in low voice:
''Mr. Mesrom, 1 have an account to settle
with you
The prophet reiterated as far as the wall
of his cave permitted.
Look a-here, SIR" said he, 81 don't wish
no trouble with no gent, but if you are
| looking for any you will be bounced. My
remarks are not personal, but any gent
making trouble in this museum will be
bounced by the management"
''All right" said l. II suppose, being a
prophet you don't mind answering a few
! questions?"
Not if they're CIVIL" said he
| 'What / want to ask you, Mr.. Mesrom,
| is this" said l. what the deuce do you
mean by putting up in your envelopes
prophecies calculated to alarm nervous fe-
| undergraduates of death and disaster?
| Such one, bought of you, has done more
mischief than can tell. 1t is absurd that
it should be so, but it is fact. You have
| upset a Iady's health and unbalanced her
mind"
ooh, Johnm whispered Annie reproach.
| fully; but / went on, shaking my fist at the
prophet:
| GA woman who believes that your non.
sense is prophecy got hold of one of those
| yellow envelopes that foretold her speedy
death, and, as | said, the consequences
were deplorable and are still. She will not
listen to reason. She may die of over.
wrought imagination, and if she dies you
die also! I've mind to kill you nowr'
The prophet retreated again as | shook
my fist at him. but he. stared at me in
amazement as he did so.
! ''LOok here, SIR said he, 1--WE don't put
no prophecies of that there character into
none of our envelups. Them sort wouldn't
be popular. Our'n is all favorable and en-
couraging. We make a rule they shall be-
Besides,
Him that prigs what isn't his'n,
! When he's cotched shall be sent to prison,
which is in the gents basket, and is re-
! garded as joke There amt no evil
prophecies in the collection. Oh, no, it's
some other prophet. There is two or three
of them along the Bowery. None genuine
/ but me-
"My FRIEND" said |, you are the person
| who had booth at the state fair at Hobbs
witch last autumn"
Eyes, l was there" said the prophet:
'but, as / said, our'n, especially for the la
dies, is all encouraging"
do YOU call this encoun ging?" asked
taking the envelope from my pocketbook
where / had kept it since that fatal day
''Read it!'
MI 4htStoIIl IOoh VIC Siip VI paper
me, gazed at it, and read it aloud:
Lovely lady, you will die before the
violets blow he repeated.
| Now, eff that amt a blamed shame, I'm
a donkey! See here-that amt no fault OF
mine I'll explain. But the lady hasn't
read the rest of the printing; it's been
folded up and tucked under somehow
readin' it altogether amt so bad
10 had crnooth he'd the Daner now and II
was evident that it had been folded so as tc
conceal several words which followed those
had read.
Lovely lady, he began again, you vii
die before the violets blow if you let thai
cold run on and don't take good old DR.
Dodds' Magic Cough Strip this winter
For sale in the great hall. 81 per BOTTLE
'Don't you see?" Mr.. Mesrom said, ap
pealing to me, that that amt no proph
ecy, but just regular adj? I'll tell you
the way of it: That old quack, DR.. Dodds
had his cough strip at the fair, and he
bribed our boy to stick some Of them cir
cylars into cur envelups. | suppose some
was distributed before | caught him at il
and dismissed him with as good weltine
as boy ever had Why, that amt no proph
ecy, lady! Here, lady, let Polly picl
you out a true one to make up for it. NJ
charge whatever"
He held the paroquet toward the basket
She jerked cut any envelope with her beal
and dropped it into Annie's hand.
"Open it," said L; "open it and read it
1t is the true one, you know" and on the
instant the dear girl obeyed and read aloud
you'll be bride in June"
"All's well that ends WE'LL" said the
prophet "Hope you are satisfied, sir?''
Entirely" said I, offering him my cigal
case, and Annie and I went home togethe!
in a state of utter beatitude, to which W.
had been strangers since our first interview
with the prophet, and when we arrived a
the door Annie rushed into her mother
arms, crying out:
ooh, mamma, dear! am not to die whel
the violets blow-I am to be married i
June MARY Kyle Dallas in Firesid
Companion.