davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19

-Hta 4 uonad,s " run -do,c,a,"
overworked, weak, nervous and de-
bilitated that's woman that DR.
Pierce's Favorite Prescription is
made for. 1t gives her health and
strength. All woman's weaknesses
and all woman's ailments are cured
by it. It's legitimate medicine
not beverage an invigorating, re.
storative tonic and soothing and
strengthening nervine, free from al
cohol and injurious drugs. 1t i'm
parts tone and vigor to the whole
system. &
For all functional Irregularities,
periodical pains, organic dispIace-
ments and uterine diseases, it's a
positive remedy.
And guaranteed one. If 1t
doesn't give satisfaction, in every
case, the money paid for it Is re-
funded. No other medicine for
women is sold on these terms,
That's because nothing else is
"just as good" Perhaps the
dealer will offer something that's
"better." He means that it's bet
ter for him. l
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
ODDS AND ENDS.

In Prussia inventors appear to be rare
birds, for the average number of patents
issued there every year is only 100.
The population of Belgium amounted or
the last day of December 1891, to 6,147.-
041 Brussels has about 5000 inhabi-
tants.
A New York barber makes the impor.
tant announcement that boards have gone
out of style. Smooth faces and long hail
are now the thing.
For stings or bites from any kind of in
sect, apply dampened salt, bound tightly
over the spot 1t will relieve, and usual
ly cure quickly, it is said
Z Prof Il. L. Garner, of Washington,
after studying the subject for eight years,
has s-been convinced that the monkeys
have a language Il have discovered ~
he says, that this language has but three
consonant and two vowel sounds, :"
Hon f. G. Waite, secretary of State of
California, has sent George g. Spur, of
Boston, an adobe brick and an oaken shin
gle taken from the ruins of Suffers Fort,
now swallowed up in the city of Sacra-
mento, For years this was the very out
post of American civilization.
A horrible accident happened at pri-
vate house in Paris. The host had invited
a number of friends TO luncheon. A great
Danish boar hound was in the room, ac-
cording to custom a guest happened to
drop his napkin, and while STOPPING to
pick it up the dog with spring seized his
throat and killed him. There was terri
BILE struggle to pull the beast of, but with
out avail. =
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
rHE NSGELUs.
FANTASTIC FACTS.

A fea can jump over barrier 500 times
his own height,
A Boston boy recently defined a we'd
Z ding nothing but a prayer meeting with
a soeiable after it
The savings banks of the country show
n deposit for the last year of 81 for each
OF the people OF the United States.
Tho depth az which some OF the Belgian
coal mines are worked is something pro-
digious In pit at Fienu the work is
new done at s. T0) feet,
Straight streets arc unknown in China,
They are purposely made crooked to con
fuso Satan, as the Chinese believe TIC
dcvii trnyels in straight line.
4 Maine farmer who believes in a strict
ohsery ance OF the Sabbath went out and
killed a lamb which persisted in bleating
on recent Sunday afternoon.
Lnud has reached an enormous value in
London piece of crown land on Pail
Mall has just been leased at a rate based
on selling price OF s., 100000 per acre.
A fireman at Myerstown, Pa, wore a
cclluloid collar to a FIRE, when it became
heat nnd burned his neck and discolored
his face
A Saratoga letter tells of a woman
there whose hair has turned within a year
from gray 10 b,ack-its original color
! She is 20 years old, and her hair has been
gray for twenty years.
The scientist OF tho Boston Herald has
discoyered a remedy for snoring. The
whole world should be thankful y it says,
.'that merely pressing "a carboio smoke
bah TO the nostrils is going to free it from
this criminal habit"
A West Chester pa man who went to
his stable yard early one morning TO in
vcstigate queer noise found that horse
had broken loose and dog was holding
on to the halter to prevent the animal
leaving the premises
There is a baby in Chester, Pa, whose
diminutive size may be inferred from the
fact that its arms are ahout the thickness
OF an ordinary lead pencil Nevertheless
it is thriving and might in time become
president of the United States were it not
OF the wrong sex
The oldest church in Europe Is said by
some who are discussing the question to be
st Martins, Canterbury, which was built
ms n church before the end of the fourth
7 century. st. Mary in the Castle, Dover,
! was built about this time, but for nearly
200 wears it was used as a garrison fuel
! depot
I According to the Scientific American,
I rbe earliest Connecticut patent found on
( record was granted in October, 17l7, to
I Edward Hinman, of Stratford, for the ex-
/ elusive right and liberty OF making mo-
7 lasses from the stalks of Indian corn in
Fairicld county. for ten years, which
Grant ended with the words Always
4 pIoviied the said HinInan make as good
itiblnsses, and makes it as cheap, as comes
from the West Indies. -
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
A SMALL SERMON.
Like fIe Moth That Files Into tho
Candle, In Danger.


Candle, In Danger.
The night WAS dark and as the doc
tor tripped homeward from the late
train he fell over the boys bicycle and
lay for some moments prone upon the
damp earth. When at last he came
into the lighted parlor he told us that
he had been swearing writes Amber,
in the Chicago Herald. and, what was
more. he would do it again under
similar circumstances. '.For, " said he.
If this confounded village council
can't be made to light their measly
lamps, it is time that men swore"
But what good Will swearing do?"
asked grandma, looking for all the
world like blessed angel ready TO fly
away to heaven, with the lampNght
shining upon her thistle-down puffs OF
hair. DO YOU really think con-
tinued she, that taking things hard
and putting our precious souls in dan
ger OF eternal loss by using bad Ian
guage, will help those rough things TO
move more smoothly? In my estima-
ton and here the old lady's voice
dropped so low that we could hardly
catch her words. the man who takes
little mishap is like the moth that flies
into the lamp; he is in danger of being
scorched and shriveled in the flame"
''Oh, didn't really swear" said the
doctor. Il only said damn itr A man
can't get along without saying that
sometimes; it acts like the safety cock
in boiler, lets off superhuous force
and prevents disaster We call it
swearing, but it is no more profane
than the Oh. Lordr and the Coed
gracious of an irritated woman"
For my part" said the young per-
son. who, from vast experience with
the darker side of human nature.
might well be expected TO talk wisely;
Il wouldn't give the snap of my finger
for a man who didn't use strong lam
guage now and then. II there is any
thing we girls absolutely loathe it is
mealy- -mouthed, meek goody-goodies,
who never drink anything stronger
than buttermilk. nor" --
10 be manly and strong, broke in
the middle-aged aunt docs not neces-
state either hard drinking profanity,
or the adaptability of the prize-fighter.
II you have Il good horse you are con-
tent with it as a good horse, without
requiring the ferocity of the tiger, the
bulk of the buffalo or the speed of the
ostrich. The same way with a man.
! 4 hero can be heroic without being
brutal, n brave man can be courageous
without developing the bieeps of Il
ring bully. and man can be manly
without getting drunk or taking Gods
name in vain to prove his manliness.
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
Good for the Tone of a Piano

Good for the Tone of Piano.
From the Albany Argus.
at is a popular notion that tpianos
ought to be kept very dry" said a
well-known pianist the other day.
Nothing could be more fallacious
Pianos are not nearly so much af-
iected by heat or cold as they are by
dryness, and reversely by dampness.
1t is not generally known that the
sounding board, be life of a piano,
is forced into the case when it is
made so tightly that it bulges up in
the centre, on the same principle as
a violin. The wood is supposed to
be as dry as possible, but ofcourse it
contains some moisture, and gath
ers more on damp days and in hand
ling. Now, when piano is put into
an over-heated dry room, all this
moisture is dried out, md the board
loses its shape, and gets fiabby and
cracks. Even if it doesn't crack, the
tone loses its resonance and grows
thin and tinny, the felt cloth and
leather used in the action dry up,
and the whole machine rattles. !"
How will you prevent this?"
"keep a growing plant IN your
room, and so long as your plant
thrives your piano ought to, or else
there is something the matter with it
1t should be noted how much more
water will have to be epoured into the
flower pot in the room where tht
piano is than in any other room"
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
Intelligent proorreaaer..

Prof. Carl Nogt, OF Germany. the
weil-known scientist tells the follow
ing amusing story anent discussion
OF the question whether a'prooff,eader
should have knowledge OF the contents
OF an article that passes through his
hands: ''When Edward Desor and my
sell were working with Agassiz at
Neuenburg my friend Desor was
charged with describing certain fossil
fish after the latter's notes. Desor
used to dictate these descriptions to u
young man who pretended to know all
about it. while Desor counseled him to
consider himself merely an unconscious
tool. To sound the knowledge of his
clerk my colleague one day, under my
connivance. dictated TO his secretary
the most absurd nonsense by interlac-
ing the description of some fossil fish
with the particular statement This
remarkable specimen differs from all
others in the abnormal fact OF having
its head in the same spot where the
others tails are found. The clerk
took everything down as 1t came from
the lips OF my collaborator without re-
beling. DesoF accidentally being
called away. forgot his trick and the
manuscript went to the printing ofiice
The proof was read by DIR. G., who had
expressly been appointed to this post
by Agassiz, and besides intrusled with
the compilation OF this 'Nomenclator.
Desor and myself read the second
prooisi go did Agassiz, who placed his
iinprimatur upon them. but mona OF us
FDIfF tnOlg upstr. ~ .ha uOnEaasa (,
contained. The whole was printed.
aud only theu. when the series was
about to be sent to the subscribers, my
frtcnd Dcsor remembered the trick he
had played on his amunuensis. A
special card had TO be inserted in place
Of the Objectionable passage The con-
clEsion may easily be drawn-foar
pfooiruadevs had read the article with
out consciously taking knowledge OF
it, contents
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
One of MIR. Barnum's Stories

One of MIR. Barnum'S Stories,
Mr.. Barnum was too modest the
other day when he said that he failed
in everything except-a big exception
the show business. As II popular
preacher or n temperance lecturer
Mr.. Barnum would have been equal
ly successful. The effect of the rich
and racy Yankee twang was irresis-
tible If you had shut your eyes
and opened your ears you would
have imagined that n high-class
Christy minstrel corner man was
addressing the audience For a
practiced orator of 80 Mr.. Barnu m
has splendid voice, which. most of
our NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. would give "a
deal for.
The funniest ofthe stories illustrated
the height of meanness. A man of
"our town" had opened store and
offered free drinks to customers.
One night enter a stranger with:
"What's the price of darning-nee-
les?' "a cent piece" Sand what
do you give for eggs?" "Sixpence a
dozen" ''Well, that's d cent apiece,
too, isn't it? So I'll take darning-
needle and leave this egg. The ex-
change was effected, and then the
egg man said "You promised to
treat each customer" "Well, what
viii you drink?' Il guess I'll have
glass OF sherry wine.' The glass
of sherry was brought. Looking at
it thoughtiully the customer" OBJ
served: ''It's very remarkable
thing, but somehow | never could
drink sherry wine without an egg in
it," "Well, you shall have it" said
the store-keeper As the contents
fell into the sherry it was seen that
the egg had two yelks. "Well, now"
said the drinker, my wife would be
blessed if she knew that-to think
that she parted with two yelks for
one darning You really must
give me another for that second
yelk Pail Mall Gazette.
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
FROM LOWELl'S POEMS.

once to every man and nation comes the
moment to decide.
In the strife of truth and falsehood, for
the good or evil side; ii Isl ltsaa s.a
some great cause, God new Messiah of
fering each the bloom or bright,
Parts the goat upon the left hand and the
sheep upon the right;
And the choice goes by forever 'twixt that
darkness and that light ~
The Present Crisis.
Ez fer war, l call il murder
There you hev it plain and fiat;
! don't want to 20 no furder
Than my Testyment fer that.
--lhe BigetOlc Papers.
This child is not mine as the first was,
cannot sing it to rest
cannot lift it up fatherly
And bless IL upon my breast;
ct it lies in my little ones cradle
And sits in my little one's chair,
And the light of the heaven she's gone to
Transfigures its golden hair.
The Chan9eling.
Be noble and the noblen ness that lies
other men, sleeping, but never dead,
Viii rise IN majesty to meet the throne.
Sonnet IN Ed. 1865.
Laborin' man and laborln' woman
Hev one glory an one shame,
Ey'y thin thet's done inhuman
liners all on 'em the same.
The BjgeloW Papers.
Ie looked on naked nature unashamed,:
And saw the Sphynx now bes tial, now
divine,
change and rechange; he nor praised
nor blamed,
But drew her as he saw with fearless
line,
Did he good service. God must judge, not
we;
Manly he was, and generous and sin
cere;
English in all, of genius blithely free,
Who loves man may see his image
here. "A Bust Of Fielding.
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
super.tl,lons Aiiont Inseet-.

In Germany. where cEicisets are sol
dom seen, fts cry Is thought 70 be a
death warning. la sL.
Tapuaya Indians OF South America
believe that the eyil spirit assumes the
form OF a fly when bent on mischief,
The Spaniards of the sixteenth csn-
tury believed that an unusual number
OF spiders in a mountainous region in
dfoated that gold in abundance could
be found at that point. Notwithstand-
inr the fact that the beetle was the
sacred insect among tho Egyptians, it
has been mentioned but few times IN
folle-lore- frf7 lr4F ~ l4 VI
In Germany stag beetles are held TO
be in League with the devil.
In Ireland they are thoroughly
hated; why. no one seems to know.
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
and Feathers,

piian preserves an incl
~ho. wishing to punish
pst and a forester for
with their dishonor-
10 appointments with
and then contrived
pa be stripped and
oask full of fcashers,
RE huntcd by her hus-
the dogs and inhabit-
se at their heels In
enalty was introduced
Ionense in 1888 when
re setting out for the
iGed, in order TO pre-
Inc Of his fleet that
d he convicted of theft
ms head shaved; that
opld then be poured
cushion Of feathers
He was afterward to
lore at the first place
though. after a bap-
pitch, the poor wretch,
ave little life left in
'n times the practice
with the populace as
ily executing justice
nom the law. perhaps.
ty to reach. Gentle
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
The German winds are gleefully await
ing the growth of Williams whiskers.

Is PRIcKLY Assn BITTERs good for any
thing. Read what Frank Griggsby, Of
Dodge City, Kas., says: "For three years
suffered from disease that my physi
clans pronounced incurable. My friends
had given me up 10 die, when / was in
duced to try your remedy. / took it for
three months and have gained So pounds
in weight. Am we'll man nnd Prickly
Ash Bitters saved my life | am under
life long obligations tc this mediciue, and
will never cease to recommend it.
Hardly week passes but we are con-
stantly surrounded by perils seen and ker
osepc.
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
Pnreeiiun Africa.

Africa is slowly but surely passing
from the control Of the native rulers.
1t comprises about IL 900. O00 square
miles, of which only 8, 500. 600 are
governed by Africans. France has
2.309. 21z square miles; England,
l. 900, 4i5; Germany, l. .035. 720; Congo
Free State, 1000. 900; Portugal. 774,-
993; Italy, $50, 0oo.. and Spain. 21o,-
600. While the share of France is
largest England's is smost valuable. e
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
rhe corpse crook a Mand.r

DR.. L. Corneau. author of work
entitled Certain Signs OF Death, y
says that he can cite ninety -six, we'll
authenticated cases where persons
were buried alive by mistake Here
is one: A French army officer. on
August 80. 1886, was buried at Saintes
with military honors. The parting
salute awoke him from apparent death
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
Les. Jaw, More Brain.

Another scientific observer publishes
a pamphlet to show that,the European
jaw is narrowing through the lesser
severity of its labors that accompanies
civilized food. The lower jaws of the
later English are smaller than those
of ancient Britons, or even Australians.
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
New clearing. in Frontier settlement,

Often give birth to miasma,, as one Of the
hrst fruits of an upturning of the soil.
Malaria is a relentlcs, foe to the newly ar
rived emigraut II he be unprepared to meet
1t by the use of reliable preparative, and
preventive. 1t. therefore. behooves those
seeking the far West in search of homes Ia
provide themselves with medicinal guaran
aud ailments of kindred origin. Hostetter'f'
Stomach Bitters has for nearly half CEN
tury been esteemed the best. From Maine
to Oklahoma frum Victoria to San Juan del
sud. its acknowledged superiority meets
with no challenge In localities where 1t has
been used Medical testimony, the most
positive and direct, backs up the general
verdict, no less In regard To its virtues iu
case of liver complaint, dyspepsia. consti-
patton. rheumatism and kidney ailments,
than in cases of malarial diseases
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19

He knocked upon the lid of the coffin,
WAS heard and set at liberty. He
marched back To the house of mourn
ling at the head OF the detachment
lilnt had been detailed to escort his re-
mains to the tomb, st Louis Repub-
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
Worse and More of Ii.

Irate Subscriber demand to see
the editor. Where is hep ~
Printer-He's in the loft. The citi-
zens tarred and feathered him last
night. -.
!. S.-Yes, and that's just what l
want to see him about The tar be-
longed to me. and | want the editor to
pay for it.-Atlanta Constitution.
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
The Only One Ever Printed-Can You
Find the Word?

There is 3 inch display advertisement
in this paper this week which has no two
words alike except one word. The same
is true of each new one appearing each
week, from the DIR. Harter Medicine Co.
This house places Crescent" on every
thing they make and publish. Look for
it, send them the name of the word, and
they will return you Book. BEAUTIFUL
LITHoGRAPHs OR SAMPLES FREE.
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
ana ClpapIet,

&s bridal wreath and
i;E3at notion in many
Ajin removing these
care that her brides
vay every pin. Not
d that misfortune will
oe who retains even
her marriage toilet.
ne bridesmaid If they
I, as their prospects
thereby be materially
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19
4 KILL THEMSELVES
,,ur,er Have Bssn Er-
h.n.frl. ,

II IL
! men easily disprovo
I'M somewhat at sea in
tier answer Was the
,neea crazy when he en-
N batn and opened his
he Chicago Tribune
uudreds Of Romans WHO
,spatch OF themselves in
mot
rarely committed sui
Il tune it was quite III !
he. 1t Is the rar'sst of
have 10 commit. suicide.
owner often does. EI-
|ialls to dcyelop a single
lrican colored man COM
| though there have been
|ong mulat,oes AID octo-
Il he said. then, that the
1 the suicidalP Surely
eks we're AT least tho
Romans The solution
| elsewhere.
l-ious belief has some
f. IT. but 1t would be
Il. One fact however.
H.. Among the lowest
h AMI In ths lowest in
Of any society suicide
Il known, and among the
| or culture II is extreme.
b. the middle or lower
! Is most common II
y midway on the course,
or individuals those
Struggle who lose heart
Hen into eternity This
y wny OF saying that
le Is fwcest there aro
Ids and suidea deaths;
won the victory and
! In camp and Designing
\ fairly well saiish "a
Eon The cultured and
badelDhian IS on tho
j. to i've as the naked
assigned for suicide
J degree curious In
-;O-do suicides sinply
are iirsd Of lne-tho
4 too much for them.
|uilenan left a mote To
be was tired OF com
out. laying down aad
Etoaing and unbuttoa-
n cabmaa wrote TIA.
\ all the pleasures OF
world. and wanted TO
drove IN the other.
love and poverty furn-
number Of cases. and
baH-ring the grsafesI
= c1se- are thosc IN
iamily dies together.
Saliogd case vhIca
ears ago. was the most
= druggists asaistant.
the loss oi position
rIe slcecedcd ~ gain
consent. n hts le-te-
the whole family
DO. but she did not
bhea tho fatal dose was
aye her and the young
kic acid In a cooling
p down for the night
minutes they cxPi-cd
|OnH ~ one no disposed
T. children IN the sams
kaee and without pain.
wrote lie then drew
out and obtained the
illnesses. returned and
p aad then swallowed
vas soon o c5rPsc-
BEYOND analysis by q
Yet we cannot say IL
possible 70 conceive OF
1ic.ds not already en-
one; but whenever one
method he Is sure to
imi,a,ors Hanging.
o1tng. stahbing. or
eat,Ing. shooting aud
high places. are most
y women have swallow
PEdered glass and other
(ielcs- Cleopatra ap-
her bosom. and it Is
- she has hnd no Imi-
have a horror OF SER
arc not easily obtain
desired France leads
In suicides as in the
ch we have the record
Iet themselves in each
7 population. and the
p. or 1912 suicides
dtth were In Paris.
/ by charcoal fumes IS
Faod. In London near
Fne with tho knife and
plain truth that in this
|sh are the worst cut
|ope.
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19

Celebrated Wins Product Of New Jer.sy
The best wine in the country Is Speerss Paf
Grape Wine, which has become q celehrateA
product Of New Jersey. This wine and his
rely upon them as the purest to be had
hen on a farm doesn't mingle in pro
miscuous society; she has her own exclu-
sive set
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19

You Can Secure a Good Business Position
by learning bookkeeping arithmetic, writing, Ghort-
hand etc, by mail Bryants College, Buffalo. n T.
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19

When Baby was sick, we gave her castociA.
When she was a Child, she cried fcr Castoria.
When she became Miss she chung to CastnriA.
When she bad Children, she gave them Castoris,
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19

''Hnn.on's Magic Corn sniv1-
Warranted to cure, money refunded Ask
your druggist for 1t. Price Is ccnts-
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19

There is nothing like prosperity to cover
faults, and it may be said that money COW
ers more than charity. ftt Nt.t.t,
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19

The advertisement of Jno. Anglum,
druggist, appears in another column Ho
has been il the drug business in Denver
for the last twenty one years.
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19

CONDUCTOR z. D. LooMIs Detroit Mich.
says: "The effect of Halls Catarrh Crre 10
wonderful" Write him about II. Sold ~
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19

FITS.-AH Fits stopped free by Dr. KLhks cgkn
Nerve Restorer. No Fit after first day use Mar
EeIlous cures Treatise and t2 90 trial bottle
Fit Send Dr. XII ne s3i Arch St, Phiia Pa
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19

Call Chicago girl large hearted and
generous, if you choose, but never refer To
her as big soied
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19

1t is the man who lives next door TO .
noisy grocery who would like to lay the
corners tone. s.-....il -
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19

A divining rod greatly resembles de-
signing woman. Both try to locate wealth.
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19

To buy or sell stocks or interests in As
pep mines write b. Clark Wheeler, Aspen.
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19

The man of destiny It's said
Presents the greatest case eer seen.
Of that malady called swelled-head,
Why don't he use Coa1ine.
The Lamar register., 1891-09-19

Eve ''put on airs,'' it may be ro-
marked in extenuation that she bad nttle
else to put on.