The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-08-23
BRIGHT BITS.
MISS TRILL-I love to hear the birds sing
Jack Maliet (warmly)-So do 1. They never
attempt piece beyond their ability Puck.

Jack Malet (warmly)-So do 1. They never
attempt piece beyond their ability Puck.
''WHY is it that you fly, o, youth,
And with such careful STEALTH"
"Her father comes aud l, in sooth,
Am travelling for my health"
-WaShtnqton Star.
CALLER AT BAR HARBoR-Mr. Blaine, how do
you feel to-day?
Mr.. Blaine TO servant)-John, bring in the
New York papers of this morning and find out
for the gentleman how feel.-St. LOUIS Globe
Democrat.
RNoT UNcoMMoN.-"Do you employ your man
Rastus by the month or day.
well, with Rasus. It'll sort of both. en-
ploy him to do days work now and then but
it always takes him month to do it."-Har-
per'S Bdzdr.
Il DON'T see why you men should prefer one
newspaper to another merely on account of its
politics" said Mrs Wickwire. The news in
each one is pretty much the same. And the
bargain advertisements are exactly the same. d"
-Indidndl oils Journal.
IVES SIDE-How did you come to lose the
tug of-war? l thought you had a cinch.
NJ. Hattan-We did, too; but our anchor
moved over TO Brooklyn some time ago and has
lately bought BABY carriage He was think
ing of it Just at the critical point of the pull
and-pushed-Puck
A SINEcURE-A certain physician, who has
not got much practice, hired small colored
boy to accompany him in his visits and hold
Inc DOThB. HOW QOSS yer ike yer new
placer" asked the boys mother when he came
home on Saturday night Il likes it fusrate
We neber has to stop at de house at all like de
udder doctors. jess git all de rid.n' wants, ~
was the repiy.-Terds Sifttngs.
AN ADVOCATE, seeing that there was no longer
any use of denying certain charges against his
client, suddenly changed his plan Of battle in
order TO arrive at success in another way
We'll, be it So" he said; my client is a
scoundrel and ths worst liar in the world"
Hara he iufar1intad nv the indpa yub
marked: Brother b. you are torgett. ing
yourself "-ChtcdJo Legal Ad0,Ser.
IT APPEARS that the promulgators of dress re-
form knew what they were about when they
selected Chautauqua as the spot upon which to
send reform dresses out upon an unenlighIened
world 'Chautauqua" is descriptive term
and it means "a bag tied in the middle" There
is something eminently felicitOus in the con-
junction of ''Chautauqua" and tho newly re-
| formed species Of whaieboneless dresses Chi
cd0o Morning Nelcs
JUDICIAL RHEToRIC.-In Ames VS. Scudder. de-
cision by the supreme court of Missouri, one of
the judges of that eminent tribunal concludes
his opinion thus: "In my humble opinion such
a theory of the law is only equ4led in its world
combracing comprehenSiveness by the mission
AIRY hymn-placeS an administrator in this state
on the same pedestal where the grafton of Phil
lips places Napoleon the Great-maklng him
proof against perlS endowed with ubiollity =
American Ldt0 RevteU,
A New JERSEY MAN who had caught a boat
load of fish day or two ago was Just ready to
pull for the shore when he fell overheard and
was drowned. The boat remained right side up,
and the fish were saved to his family So it goes.
Let man really catch a lot of fish and begin
congratulating himself that he won't have ollie
about it, and something is sure to happen to
HIM THESE sad lessons ought to teach us not
to strive against natural laws.-Detroit Free
Press.
A MISGUIDED BIBLIoPHiLE.-First Biblioma-
niac--Helo, old man, what are you driving at
now?
Second Bihliomaniac-A great idea, I'm
celebrating with prints and marginal sketches a
fne first edition copy Of Sites History of
Brooklyn" 8ibtllu@
First Bibliomaniac--But,7u 1y dear fellow, is
thst not a rather thAnkless task:
Second BibliomautSc (hestating) - Welt
don't know "a pauss-then desperately)-you
see L was born therei 40 1es
First Bibliomanisc-Bu why memorabilia it?
THAI was not your fanit-ronly your misfortune
Brooklyn Life. -oj5o,