The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-07-24
SCNFLOWER SILHOUETTES,

up to be.
Every crop in Kansas in 1891 has been
success but the ice crop.
! The Kansas women, when fruit is plenti-
| full. would rather put up than shut up.
1t became almost necessary for the court
| of impeachment to have an extra session
on Mckay's account.
Since PETER was elected great many
people who emigrated from Kansas to
| Oklahoma have ceased to regret it.
| A little Wichita girl refused to drink
glass of milk, the other day, because, she
said, it tasted just as though it had been
! near cow.
The time has come at last in Kansas
when there is less jam at the Alliance pic
mic and more on the farmers bread and
butter at home.
The Emporia Republican vouchsafes the
| information that the Kansas Democrats
are looking sober. 1t is an old truisn that
things are not what they SEEM"
While John j. Ingalls, was United
States senator he wrote 10000 letters to
constituents, not counting speeches, pub
lie documents and packages of seed sent
upon request.
Plumb is the greatest letter writer in
the United States senate. The difference
between Plnmb aud Bent Murdoch is that
the latter gentleman spends most of his
time dropping a line" into the Walnut
for bass.
Jerry Simpson is down south explaining
to the colored man, that he should join
the Alliance because Jerry remained at
home when the rest of the north was
down south knocking the shackles of slav-
cry off the negro.
Judge Mckay might make the defense
that his disregard of the orders of the high
court came from an unwillingness to con-
found Republican supreme court with
high heaven. 1t will be remembered that
order is heavens first law"
Jerry Simpson says ''the sock story orig
mated with little red-headed editor who
was rotten before he was ripe" The first
mention of Jerrys sockless condition oc-
CURED in this column. To all of Jerry's
faults add ingratitude.
Il have given up lecturing this
summer" said an intelligent AL
lance educator yesterday. There
is no trouble in getting the
farmers to attend, but when they do
come, they will get over in one corner and
20 to quarreling among themselves about
who has the cornstaIk with the biggest
number of ears on it."
The other day it was raining hard when
Mrs. Lease boarded street car. The car
was chuck full and all the men on the
seats sat closer back and evinced a deter
mination to keep position OF sedentary
comfort. Mrs. Lease cast her eye down
the car and at the same time a stopped
man in the corner started to rise. Don't"
said the man next to him, grasping his
arm. That's Mrs. Lease. Don't you
know her? She believes in equality of the
sexes. Woman suffrage, you know"
The stopped man smiled and got up.
Come" said the speaker, still more
importunate, you're not going to get up,
are you? If she thinks she's equal to a
man, let her stand. Give her a dose of
her own medicine. See, eh?"
But Mrs. Lease had taken the mans
seat. greatly to the discontinue of the
other, who wanted to see her stand. Next
day he met the stranger on the street.
"Hello," he said, you re the man that
gave up your seat to Mrs. Lease. You
missed good chance to take her down a
little. There wasn't another man in the
car who would have given way. Wasn't
impolite, you know. just a little joke.
What made you get up? Did she hypno-
tie your"
See here" said the man addressed. 81
guess you don't know me-"
Cant say that do. Who are you, any
way?"
Pm Mr.. Lease"
There are two United States senators
who seem to enjoy the heat and ZONES ONE
ness of a Washington summer. 1t is
probable that these public servants would
object to remaining here if compelled to
do so merely from a sense of duty TO their
constituents, but as they are engaged in
the pleasant pastime of money making
they go about in the broiling sun with
out visible complaint. These senators are
Messrs Stewart and Plumb. Senator
Plumb probably knows why he remains
in Washington, but no one else seems to.
The big, burly kansan ruJhes about all
day through the business streets and the
departments, and in the evening dimes at
John Chamberlain's and joins the few
stragglers who represent the army of good
livers and good takers who make the
place nightly resort during six or nine
months Of each year. Senator Plumb has
recourse almost daily to the Turkish bath
As means Of cooling off from the excite
ment of the day. He regards these hot
baths as an effective restorer OF exhausted
vitality, aud he, therefore, pat
ronizes them frequently. During all
the hours that he lies upon ~he
marble slab. and while be eats and
talks politics at Chamberlain's and when
engaged in searching for the almighty dol
lar. he keeps firmly locked in his own
breast the nature of the business that