The morning call., 1891-08-29
ARABIAN HUMOR.
Paragraphs Illustrative of That
of Ancient and Modern Times,

The old Arabs have scarcely had justice
done them. They are usually associated
with prOwliDg Bedouin and murderous
Mamelukes, and their civilization is sup
posed to be as far behind the century as is
China That the golden era of the Caliphs
occurred when Europe was buried in the
Dark Ages; that Arab poets sang of love
and war and melancholy long before Shakes
peare; that Cordoya had paved streets when
London was mud hole, and Arab art and
science fourished centuries before the birth
OF the telephone and steam engine; that
oriental luxury reached a point of magnlfi-
cence under the Mohammedan rulers which
has never been surpassed in Paris, Vienna
aud New York-these are facts which need
only TO be known to secure for the Arab
some recognition. for qualities other than
those OF war and the chase. In its range
and variety-poetry. philosophy, theology,
science, romance, travel-Arabic literature
affords an extensive field for the student,
and offers peculiarly fascinating subjects
for inquiry and research.
Now, 1t may seem paradox to assert that
the Arabs were born humorists, and caliph
and sheik were capital reconteurs, whose
1ests and stories have not vet lost their
point. Yet such was the case.
An Arab poetaster sent his work to
famous author of the day, who praised it
replied the poet. "my. book would have al
fame?" the author inquired. "Why hang
up thy book III the market-Dlace and all will
see 1t" But how will they know the
author?" Just hang thyself close to the
book"
The oriental Joe Miller is parent to many
Jests that are still current among us. For
instance, a preacher in a mosque began the
history of Noah with this citation from the
Koran: have called Noah" Unluekily
he forgot the rest Of the verse and repeated
the same words over again. At last an
Arab exclaimed: IF Noah will not come
call somebody else" More careful was an
ether preacher who was shek as well. One
Friday when the muezzin rang out the call
for prayer he noun ted the pulpit in the
mosque and asked the people if they knew
about what he intended to preach to them
NO" they replied "Weil, then, l shall
not tell you," and he stepped down.
The next Friday he asked the same ques-
tion, and now, taught by experience, they
know, you do not need me to tell you," and
again he stepped down. The third Friday,
when the same inquiry was made, the peo-
pie said, Some of US know, and some don't
know. In that case" the preacher re-
piled, Let those of you who know tell
those that don't know" And again there
was no sermon.
One day in the coffee-house a singer sang
melody whose refrain was, Let lover do
what he may, he is to be excused" His
voice was execrable, and yet he persisted in
repeating the song. AT last a wag, who
could endure 1t no longer, threw cup of
Sherbet in his face. When the singer an
erily inquired the reason, he rejoined,
Why. l am in love, and am to be excnsed''
After due reflection an infidel became a
follower of Islam, and was told by the de-
Tenders of the faith that lie was now like
one new born. A few months passed and
his neglect OF religious rites aroused the ire
of his neighbOrs and they threatened to ac-
cuse MIN before the Cadi. ut is very odd,"
he excla med. % am only few months old
and you expect one of my age to pray"
AT a time OF great drouth schoolmaster,
accompanied by his pupils, went out to
pray for rain. He was met by an inquisi-
tive felloWW, who asked where they were
the teacher replied; God will hear the
prayers of innocent children" g If that
were so" answered the man, there would
be no teachers alive"
1t happened once that faithful Moslem
married, but when he saw his wife she
proved to be very unprepossessing. Some
days after the marriage his wife said to
him: MY dove. as you have many rela-
tiyes, wish you would let me know before
whom may unyeil." "My gazelle," he re-
piled, IF thou wilt only hide thy face from
me care MOTTO whom thou showest it."
head by javelin. The surgeon examined
the wound and told the man that as the
weapon had not touched his brain there was
every prospect of his recovery. Had pos
sessed any BRAIN" said the soldier. "I
would not have been in the battle"
Once number of captves were brought
before their conquerer. who ordered them
all TO be put 10 death, ''Let us not die
thirsty" exclaimed one of them. The
Sultan had water distributed among them
and they drank, when the same voice was
heard: "Oh. Sultan, we are now thy guests
and We know that thou respectest the rights
of hospitality" And they were released,
the slight draught of water giving them
claim on the Sulton's mercy.
What is that" said a ruler at his BANQUET.
(which did not come last year, has not come
this year and will not come next year?" An
officer. unabashed, replied: 1T must surely
be our back pay" Instead of being pun
shed for his humor. the man received what
was due him and was promoted to higher
position.
When an astrologer was condemned to the
gibbet, his friends asked him why he did
not foresee his fate. and thus avoid it. II
saw very Clearly" said he, that was to
be exalted, but did not ask the stars how it
was to be-"
The Caliph Manseur chanced to meet an
Arab on the desert, and said to him: ''Give
thanks to God, who has caused the plague
to cease that has rayaged thy country"
God is too gracious" the Arab answered,
ITO punish us with two such scourges at the
same time as the plague and the Govern
ment. IN. Y. Independent