The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-03-08
A BAD CASE.

error of his ways, and has implored me
to give his free and frank confession to
the world My husband is-or was-a
very enthusiastic man, and imagines
that he has fine eye for the arts. Being
lawyer, be enjoys considerable leisure
in the afternoons, and it is this that has
proved his ruin. shall never forget his
first ofense. It was very shortly after
our marriage Twas wondering why he
was 50 late for dinner when suddenly a
cab drove up to the door.
For one moment fancied that it must
be his mother {wivss have their mothers
in-law as well as husbands}. Imagine
my establishment when out jumps my
husband, with guilty jauntinass of
demeanor, presents the cabby with five
shillings q noted this extravaganza my
self from the window, and is followed
by that functionary, staggering under
an enormous burden, swathed in brown
holland, up the steps The usual loafer
rushes forward and fresh gratuity is
distributed, to the horror Of my econom-
ical mind At last the thing apparent
~ miniature Of the great pyramids
deposited in our small hall with a reso-
nant bang, and it's bearers depart.
What on earth makes you so very IN
punctual, deara The soup will be quite
spoiled. And what, in heavens name.
is this?
Il thought you'd like it, darling (this
With nervous fushl Its the most
wonderful bargain, and it would have
been really wicked to have let it slip.
LIS o genuine Elizabethan-but, there,
see it for yourself"
The mummy like bandagee were at
last removed, and what do you think /
behald2 An enormous rusty, musty,
dusty and hideous cloch
~Yee, he continued, ga real, antique,
Elixabethan musical clock. It plays six
tunes of the period; and, what's more,
hook at the initials craven on the face
w. s. I've very little doubt that it
once belonged to Shakespeare himself,
who was very fond Of mechanical inven-
toms. l shall have, of course, to have it
repaired and done up, and then it will
look splendid IN the dining room"
He quite took my breath away; l
could only calculate, where on earth
did you pick it up, and what did you
pay for it9"
"At the sale of an old house. Every
one said it was ridiculously cheap, and
that they'd have given twice as much
If only they had known. Just think,
only hundred dollarsl Why, I could
get two hundred for it any day."
White elephants were nothing to this
disgusting "horologe, as l found it de-
scribed in the catalogue. T. cost twenty
dollars to put right, and then it smashed
twenty dollars worth Of things in being
fixed up. It sometimes played its mis-
cradle so called tunes so rapidly that
you had to stuff your fingers in your
ears; at others, it emitted a spasmodic
and raven like croak that was positively
alarming.
At last, thank heavenl it stopped
''never to 60 again" and l firmly re-
solved that not one penny more should
be spent in "doing it land us) up" Add
to this that l subsequently discovered a
wish that had been more stern on this
first occasion, but was weak, like too
many young wives, and was satisfied
with scolding. The result was that we
gradually became deluged with the most
miserable miscellany of rubbishy bric-a-
brac, damaged furniture, dubious pict-
ures, and, in word, the refuse of the
auction room.
To believe my husband. we were the
proud possessors of Cromwells hat, By
ron's toothbrush, one Of Sheridan's | 0
US, a curl of Marie Antoinette's, Ru-
bens, Rembrandt, George Morland
q believe this latter is the evil genius Of
the Picker up) and whole roomful of
split and useless "Chippendale" and
Sheraton" etc. And all had been ac-
ouired at .'sales which had history"
at an absurd sacrifice" and to the adj
miration of the disappointed bystanders
l saw that the fiendisk habit was gradu-
ally growing upon him, like drink or
gaming. hope know my duty. re-
solved to protect myself and him, and,
after an awful scene ensuing on his ac-
QUESTION Of an infected sedan chair, | ex-
acted from him solemn pledge to give
up this pernicious habit once and for
ever.
But / was inexperienced; should have
known the male mind better. Deferred
from the open pursuit Of his nefarious
designs, he determined to muggle his
purchases in secretly. ! had observed him
lingering somewhat suspiciously over
the auction advertisements of the dailies,
and noticed also that his coat pockets
bulged out curiously ON his nightly re-
turn. One day had occasion to tidy
las good wife should periodically do
the escritoire of his dressing room What
do you think | found? The drawers.
the pigeon holes, the interstices even,
were literally crammed with heaps of
cracked and tarnished tri6es-pounces
boxes, enameied knife handles, embossed
watch cases, pocket rsvoivers and the
like
Twas Mortified II was too true; de-
barred hy the dresd Of discovery from
packing 10" big things he had Fesorted.
under miserable s1bterfuge. To small
But my presence Or mind did not desert
me. l have . strong VIII. and vowed
that our childfs inheritance should not
be thus squandered Ny husband kept
. handsome volume in which he record
ed infinitely description. the prices and
the dates Of his purchase OF this miscei-
lsneous collection Nv mind was made
IN Inumhers,1 and tickefad every one