The Port Gibson reveille. [volume] (Port Gibson, Miss.) 1890-current, 1891-08-05
THINGS WISE AND OTHERWISE.

"boom" when the assessor comes
in sight.
Nurse Ito young husband)-AI
beautiful ten-pound baby, sir.
Wagley getting things mixed in his
excitement)- Gloriousl Am / a.
father or a mother?
She-0, yesl / quite believe
there's a fool in every family. Don't
your He-Well-er-my opinions
rather biassed. You see, I'm the
only member Of our family.-JRdge.
A western girl wanted husband
SO bad that she paid $4,000 for
one, and picked out an editor. We
come high, but they must have us.
Our Society Journal.
Mrs. Simper dining with Mra.
Goldbug)-Why, frankie, ] never
knew you to ask for second piece
Of pie at home. frankie (going on
with the pie-eating)-I knew 'twant
no use.
The accepted and betrothed lover
has lost the widest charm of his
maiden in her acceptance Of him.
She was heaven whilst he pursued
her as a star; she cannot be heav-
en- If she stoops to such a one as he.
-EmersOn.
The Walters Ready Explanation
Guest-HOw came you to give me
this sOiled napkin, waiter Just
look at it. Gentlemanly Waiter
Beg pardon, sir it got folded the
wrong way. There you are now
how is that sir 2-Neic Age.
An inscription on a gravestone in
Florence, Italy, is thus translated
by the sculptor Greenough;
Here lies q cardinal who wrought
Both good and evil in his time;
The good he did was good for nAught,
No 20 the evil-that was prime.
Bobby Felt Relieved: Mother
Remember, Bobby, when you are
about to do anything wrong, that
there is One who sees you. Bobby
(anxiOusly)-Who is il, ,maw2 Moth
er (soIemnly)- God. Bobby (look-
ing relieved)-0h, ] thought yOu
meant paw. Y. San.
The proprietor Of Boston eating
saloon advertises a sacred clam
chowder every Sunday evening
Teras SiftiHgs. /
This reminds one of the Colorado I
announcement of a "grand sacred
og-fght." in the programme Of a 3
Sunday school celebration.
Going Little Too Far: "You !
remember Vickars and his wife
were divorced about year ago?
They are going to remarry. l have
just received an invitation to the
wedding" $50 have I. / wonder
II they have the impudence to ex- G
pect a second batch of presents T- e
Indianapolis Journal. T
Opie P Reid says of late Amer /
lean novel: "The trouble is, the {
writer has dragged in a moral with r
out it's permission. You can put ;
silk cord around a morals neck and
il will trot along gracefully and hap {
PLY; but when you grab it by the d
tail and drag it across the plowed O
ground, there is always unpleasant !
growing and scratching"
A Waste of Ammunition Some :
years ago in a Missouri town, Wis
ting preacher delivered a profound 8
sermon, entirely above Il
The comprehension of his hearers. e
AS he came down from the pulpit, 4
The resident pastor remarked 4: !,
'That WAS very able discourse, "
brother B.; but it was intended 9
FOR bear, while you had nothing but e
squirrels before you." k
Featherby-For weeks, Miss Eth a
i, l have been wanting to ask you q
,omething, and now in this almost .
absolute seclusion, will venture TO .
-Ethel-Oh, Mr.. Featherby, this
8 SO sudienl Featherby-You'll 6.
nv to give me fair answer7 2 Eth :, :,
,l-Y-yes. Featherby-Is there no =
me around7 Listen then: do you p
hink that Gen. Walthall will ac- W
;ept the nomination 2 W
Indignant, but Self-Possessed Vi
Whats this, Hiram2 Fighting a. II
,ain ?'' "Yes, father. That boy Of :
said his dad was going !"
o offer you $1,000 the first time he Is
aw you for your vote on an alley b
opening Job, and l let him have it D,
fght on thei Jaw" "That was right, II
ny son." rejoined the alderman :,
rom the "Steenth" ward, his face -
Iushing with honest indignation. b
DO you know-er-where Mr.. Tin II
,e-son lives 2"-Chicago Tribune. d
The Ideal Politeness of the In T
oxicated Gentleman; There was Al
,nly one other passenger on the car, =
nd the polite gentleman had "
vhole side to himself. A well dress II
ID young woman got aboard. "Have :"
Nv sheat, +" said the young man with Il
wavering bow. "Thank you, sir wv
here are other seats" said the :,
milling maiden. "Don't dishturb %
hem: take nv sheat," pleaded the m