New-York tribune., 1891-03-06
WHAT'S NEWS7

| WHAT'S NENST
! The death Of a statesman; the birth Of prince;
A presidents partisan views:
\ canddatc's chances; the fate of billi
The breach OF a trcaty-thats news.
4 railway collision; the fall of a bridge;
buccaneers plunderlng cruise;
| \ merchants misfortune: a suicides end
corner In silvcr-that6 news.
An earthquake: a winter without any storms;
a summer without any dews;
cyclone, a meteor as big "a barn
| A rainbow at mdniSht-thats news.
John VS. marriage; John KS divorce
That last Joke Of Chauncey Depew's;
| A coming out ball In McAllister's set;
White House receptOn-thats news
Tho subjec., in short. would consume whole book,
And then get moro than Its dues.
For nothing on earth Is so hard to define
As that wee monoSyllable-News
1t has been frequently remarked that European and
American residents in the East often speak slighngy
Of foreign missions. The Rev Theodore c. Williams
pastor OF All Souls Unitarian Church in this city,
who has been travelling in the East, speaks follows
on this point: "Outsde Of diplomatic and missionary
circles, foreigners In the East consist OF young com
mercal travellers soldiers sailo.s, adventures Of all
nations. They are there for purpOse-to make
money are mostly bachelors and go back to Europe
or America as soon they afford it, Their views
OF Christianity are about as valuable might be
pressed In chance conversations at, let us say, Monaco
put II strongly, but not too strongly II Is probably
true all through the East that Of the many obstacles
to the Of Christianity, the foreign colony, with
It's ayaricc It's sesualty. It's brutal arrogance toward
the natives Is of the greatest In Short the tone
OF the colonial society IS low"
Cause for Nlghtmarc.-Cholly Cholmondcley-Hnd
tewwiblc dweam last night.
Harold Harrington-Dwcam your twowsers were not
Cholly Cholmondelcy-w Dwcmt OF my an
ceStOrs. Nevah like TO dweam OF my ancestors they
were all Observation-Disclosures Circular.
some one in 1.-THE Boston Transcript makes point
against Ncw-York woman who has made herself
conspicuous for her charities Recently she sent a
hamper OF beautiful clothing missionary while at
the same moment her nursery maid had to pawn her
poor and scanty wardrobe in order to buy cheap
coffin for dead sister. The implication IS that New
York people like TO give In such way as to insure
the printing OF their names donors in annual ic-
ports. But Of course this IS no more true of New
York people than OF any other people.
A little Bangor boy surprised both his parents and
his school teacher not little recently while AZ din
ncr lie propoundcd the following scientific question
10 the teacher whc is tho quickest heat or cold "
The teacher was little slow about ventl;lng iePNs
but finally said she thought heat That IS right
said the sharp y0uagster because you can eaten
cold.'-(Le"lston Journal
The town Of Rochester. Plymouth County, Mass.
is not only out Of debt but has surplus OF S303o.
and the taxes are only $40 on $1,000. Last year
there were twenty deaths I'm the town, and thirteen
Of the deceased fifty years Of age three
being over ninety. Everybody is happy, c0ntentct
and fairly welodo, and there IS not an abandoned
farm in the town.
Down Her -" How do you like your new home ~
she asked of the woman who had basket Of clothes
In u cart
"Oh pretty WE'LL
4" Had many callers yeti"
"Ony two"
II must be a stuck-up ncighbOrhoOd.7
81 SO it Is. but know the reason they arc down on
| do up shirts for SIX cents apiece and we have
only three red stripes in the mating front
door steps. detroit Free Press"
"The Boston Transcript" gives currency to the story
that in the window OF book store OF that city there
is famous work OF English literature to which is at
tached the legend Young Knights Thoughts
Parson Dullclgh-"I try to do my duty, but
find have many enemies The parish is full OF sleep
less foes"
hear you preach. h."-(Boston Transcript.