The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1891-03-24
VARIETY.

purpose.
WorIdly-wise motto for the
wranglers about Darkest Africa, "
Keep it Dark"
To Tuberculosis Physicians: Go
slow, gentlemen. Too many Koch's
spoil the broth.
at has run down and needs
new spring." said q jeweler to
farmer whose pump had given out.
A woman forgives where man
forgets. and that is the reason she
continues to let HIM mail her let
tiers.
In Spain the barber shears
donkeys as well as men. In Amer
ica the barber shears dudes as well
as men.
1t IS mournful for the ladies to
reflect that, after all, the best-ft-
ting sealskins are worn by the
seals.
care you a Paris-ite?' asked the
Bacillus of Consumption. No"
replied the Cholera Bacillus, " I'm
Il Germ-un.'
When 4 woman gets q red nose,
cher blood is out of order When
mans nose becomes the same hue,
whisky Is out Of place.
81 would give anything if / had
a musical ear" Why don't you
take ouinine?" "Quinine?" Ger
tainly; that viii make your ears
sing"
Very Many Such Friends
What sort of a fellow is he?'
d" He's q friend who would be will
ing to share your last dollar with
you.
Competent Testimony. = I'D
rather dig cellars than walk mile
IN that skirt again, said fashion
able girl.
Both Suited.-Miss Suited: " For
my part. I believe in single blessed
ness" Mrs. Wedde: $50 do l, too;
since my husband and [ were made
one
Teacher: Mabel, you may spell
kitten" Mabel " K-double-i-
ten Kitten has not two is,
has it?" " Our kitten has"
A Georgia editor gives this good
advice: " Thump your head, and il
it thumps like ripe watermelon,
keep your mouth shut"
When a man is injured III a rail.
road wreck the managers of the
road know that, if he fails to re.
cover, his relatives will try to.
The active locomotive is of few
years and full of trouble. One lasts
about thirty years and the annua
repairs cost about Is per cent o
the original cost. But there il
waste whether you go or stanC
still.
A bill before the Indiana Legis
lature provides for the assessmen
and taxation of the capital stock
franchises and privileges of stree
railway, manufacturing, mining
turnpike, savings bank, insuranc
and like corporations.
The sale by Mrs. King of Corpu
Christi. the seattle queen G
Texas, of $4,000 2-year-old steers
probably the largest single orde
for cattle ever filled in Texas. Th
consideration was $4,000. Mr.,
Kings ranch is worth 100000.
"Mr. Chairman and gentlemen,
thank you. Nothing but a morbi
regard for the truth deters m
from saying that this is the proud
est moment of my lifel" Wit
which laconic acknowledgment
the toast Of his health, he sat dow
weared with the nightly iteratio
of the same formality to which a
official position condemned him.
The new industry of campht
production gives promise of bein
permanently established in Flol
da 1t is believed that in ten year
time there will be more campht
trees than orange trees in Florid
and that the camphor industry vi
be more profitable than that
sugar. 1t is stated that the car
phor obtained from the Florir
trees approaches more nearly
that of Japan than to Chinese cal
phor, since the odor of safro is di
tinctly recognizable.
AT Toronto on Wednesday wei
there was a parade Of unemploy,
workmen, who bore'a flag with Il
motto, "Bread or Work" Abo
$500 assembled at the City Hall
express their wishes to the Mayo
and threats Of violence were mac
Philadelphia maintains her RAJ