St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1891-02-07

one who could answer the queries Sclii
in by readers of the GLOBE. Ofcourse,
l understand that. i must start from the
bottom round Of the literary ladder"
Correct" said the editor, lighting a
20 cent Havana.
''Do you want such man?'
Eyes, we do want corresponding
editor. The last we had went as crazy
as a loon about week ago. He's III st.
Peter now in straight jacket"
"Where?" gasped the applicant.
Sin the insane asylum. you know.
Couldn't stand the strain. You look as
though you might stand it, though. Are
you well informed on general matters"'
"Yes, SIR
Well, will open a few inquiries ]
have here and see whether you can deal
with them.
CHANGING at the first question, the ed
itor asked:
"What was the date of the first Punic
warp
The student blushed.
Really" he said, Il can't remember
Just at this moment"
age did Martin Luther grow mus
tache?"
Il couldn't say, really"
els there any law to prevent man
from marrying his grandmother
nieceT
Silence.
"What day did the 18th of October,
902 fall on?"
please publish in your paper cures
for tOothache, erysipelas and headache"
Il have never studied medicine"
faltered the Byronic.
A corresponding editor is supposed to
know these things" remarked the ed
itor, severely.
What is the latest style of hair dress
ing for evening dresS%'
"What is the age of the Queen of Ia
hiti?''
But there was no need of further
questioning, the applicant had slid out
noiseIessly and quietly.
The editor relit his cigar, picked up a
copy of the Clipper, and with gentle
smile settled down to enjoy life in his
own peculiar way.
A well-known resident Oh Dayton av-
enue tells the story of his experience of
few nights ago with a bright Irish
colleen recently engaged by his wife as
maid of all work. The Old-time com
plant of the negligence of servants will
not apply in this case. for the domestic
in question was only too attentive to in
structions given her, and only too literal
in her understanding of orders.
Last Tuesday evening it was that
first found Julia installed in her new
situation. The lady of the house had
shown her what her duties would be,
and in laying down a few rules for the
young W0man'S guidance, she said:
Remember, Julia, that we never buy
anything of peddlers OF agents, or any
one at the door, and mind that on no
account is strange man to be adj
mitted to the house."
"I'll obey the instructions, ma am"
SAID Julia, firmly.
Shortly before six O'clock the lady
left the house for that of a neighbor,
and she had no sooner gone than the
bell rang.
The new servant opened the door, and
Immediately tall man, wearing a
heavy ulster, started across the
threshold.
Julia grasped the door and pushed it
as far shut as she could, filling the gap
with her own stalwart personality.
why girl" said the newcomer in
surprise, ''what do you mean% Let me
pass at once"
"Dade an | will not" replied the
maid, bracing herself firmly against the
door post.
Then the proprietor of that mansion
got mad and said sternly:
LET me pass Instantly! How dare
you behave in this mahnerW
Then he pushed against the door with
will, and the new servant had to re-
treat to the hat rack, where she seized a
heavy cane, and waving it around her
head in threatening manner, said:
''If yez thry to come in the hall, shure
I'll break the head of yez wild the club"
Conscious of the undignified figure he
cut standing on his own doorstep with a
servant girl threatening to crack his
skull, the master of the house decided
to capitnlate.
'Where is your mistress?" he asked.
'She'S out, an it was herself tould
me not to let no strange man into the
place. Divil an inch can yeZ get beyant
the door, so yeZ needn't thry."
but, my good GIRL" said the now
amused broker. II am the owner of the
house and your employer. Can l come
in noW?"
Not at all abashed by this informa-
ton, the girl stepped aside, saying in a
tone of comical eondescension:
IF yer shpake the trooth yez may
come ill.," and in he went.
The gentleman relating the incident
stated to GLOBE reporter last night
that he wouldn't swap off that girl for a
gold mine.
A certain row of residences not so
very far from St. JoSeph'S hospital are
just as much alike as it is possible for
houses to be. This fact to person of
active perception would not be embar-
RAISING, but to a rather abSent-minded
cd gentleman, who lives in one of them
with his family, the unfortunate re-
semblance between his house and that
of his neighbor proved the cause of a
very laughable mistake. The gentle
man in question had been listening to a
debate on the financial situation at the
chamber of commerce, and, after having
been almost bored to death by the un-
utterable proSinesS of the oratory, he
started homeward in brown study. Ii
was shortly after o'clock when he put
the key in his door, as he supposed. lie
entered the hall, hung up his hat and
coat, and going into the parlor he drew
up an arm chair to the fire. and sat with
his eyes half-clOSed, muSing some more
on the questions he had heard discussed
during the evening.
AS he pondered it struck him that the
arrangement of the mantel upon which
his gaze was directed was not the same
as he had remembered. Becoming in
tereSted, he looked more closely, and
felt sure that the cuckoo clock he saw
now had never been there before. Some
one entered the next room, and think
ing it was his wife he called:
''Wife, where in the world did you
get the cuckoo clock?"
There was a scream behind the cur
tainS, and the voice did not belong to
any member of the questioner's family.
Then pale but pretty face-that of a
young woman-appeared round the
edge of the portiere. She gained conf
denee as she said:
''Why, Mr.. Smith. did not know you
were here. No one told me.'
Then it dawned on Mr.. Smith that he
was in his neighbours house, and talk
ing to his neighbours wife.
Great Scott madam" he exclaimed,
81 didn't know was here either"