The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1891-12-16
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

n mllllonalre mas large VIII power
Tegas Siftings.
Everything gets round in a sewing
circle.-Elmira Gazette.
A chivalrous man will never make light
of an old fame.-B0StoR Gazette.
The crack of doom ought to be heard
at the break of day.-Pittsb,Ug Post.
1t never does any good to air opinions
that need fumisation. Elmtrd Gazette.
Wise medical men do not treat SOM
nambulism as pillow case.-BoSton Oour'
ier.
Banks of clouds are often broken by
heavy drafts of wind. .-Baltimore Anleri-
cd9.
The hotter people feel toward each
other the cooler they act.-Atchison
Globe.
1t was the reporter who attended an
execution who went out with the tied
Boston Transcript.
A mans declining years begin at fifty;
a womun's begin from fifteen to eigh-
een.--AtchisOa Globe.
An owl is regarded as an embodime
of wisdom because he knows how to ket
dark GalUeSton Ne,os.
Willie-'Pa, what's rhinestone"
Father-"A glass instrument used to skin
suckers. ."-JelOeIers' Weekly.
1t doesn't seem to require any pre-
monitory training to know how to
an assignment. Courier
There are so many toechc
one would think music ougr
we'll informed now.-PittSbury
Not few people seem to
keeping of an appointment a
no particular moment.-DetrOit
Press.
Reading maketh a man full-that is,
it fills his mind with words that he does
not know how to pronounce .-Indiaadp-
oils Journal.
How fortunate for us that the Indian,
when he disappeared from New England, f,
forgot to take his summer with him!-
LotoeH Courier.
Never speak i'll of anybody; you can
do Just as much execution with shiug
of the shoulders or significant look
MlWaukee Sentinel.
North Side Mother-"Oscar, why
can't you be a good boyl" Hayward
Four ear-old-"Mamma, it makes me
so tired. "-Chicago Tribune.
Leary-"Still waiting for your ship to
come in, chg Weary-"Oh, they've
come. Whole fleet of 'em. All hard
ships. ."-haianapolis Journal. p
do not love my fellow man,
BY no means rs | ought'er.
But great Jemima Goose-grease Jane,
How do love his daughter
Detroit Free Press.
"Do you think those shoes ara worth
mending2" "Vell, yes, if l sole and heel
TEN and put new uPpers on ten. The
strings are still goot. LEATHER Dealer.
"Dd you steal my scales9" demanded
the excited grocer. "By no means, re-
sponded the suspected; ~ merely made
weigh with them. Baltimore An,eri-
can.
Lace (enviously)- see you arc to bo
in general use this season." Jet (com-
placently)-"Yes,I am among the gilt
tering generalities of society. "-BIlti-
more american.
"Why isn't Pauline married." asked
the family friend. "She's surely old
enough" eyes, answered the loving
mother, "but, you see, I'm too young
! just yet myself Fliegeaae Blaettsr.
"This tipping business is getting be.
yond all proportions, grumbled De Pey-
ster. "Why, cannot even get my hat to
convey my respects to a lady on the street
unless tip it."-Battim0re american.
"Aren't you afraid that you are living
too well for your health,' asked the
chicken. ~ amt in this for my health, "
answered the turkey, between pecks. II
lm out for tho stuI, SO to speak. -
Indianapolis Journal.
The jury brought in a verdict of "not
guilty" Judge Duffy said admonIshing
ly to the prisoner "Atter this you ought
to keep away from bad company" "Yes,
your honor, you will not see me here
again in hurry. .'-ItzIs SitiHQs.
"Do you know Duzenbury" "Yes.
"WelI, he is a cool customer. ''What
has he done nowl" "He lives in fur
nished apartments, and during the late
cold spell he used the furniture Of his
landlord for fuel. - Iergs Sittiags.
Chambermaid (ately from the coun
try, now in a city situation)-'I wan
the Forget Me Not Waltzes." Musi,
Dealer-"For four handsl" "FouI
hands! OF course not. Do YOU think
my mistress is a monkey. F}iegsaa
Bldett5r.
Wool-'A friend of mine recently
wrote poem for a magazine with one
hand and thunped the piano with the
other, to amuse the baby" Van Pelt-
"What was the poem about2' Wool
"Nothing; didn't l say Il was for
magazineF-NeO York sen,