davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22
FROM MISS TO MRS.

A Young Lady Who Changed Her Name
and Yet Did Not.
Change the name and not the letter, il q
change for worse and not for better" is an old
adage. Miss Sarah McElroy. however, defeated
the mystic potency of the saw by being princi-
pal In a wedding ceremony last evening in
which she simply changed her name from Miss
to Mrs. The letters of her surname remain
the same. and she is now Mrs. William Nc
Elroy.
The marriage took place at Mrs. Alexander's
home at Copeland station. The young couple
are both former Alleghenians, and have
numerous friends in the city.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22
Humane Society Managers.

In the report of the Board of Managers
elected by the Humane Society. one class was
omitted. The board for the present year con-
sists of Messrs John H. McCreery Joel Kerr,
H. Lee Mason, Jr., James H. Lockhart, s. L.
Fleishmann. Mrs. Samuel Mckee. Mrs. Dr.
Wallace, Mrs. II. Lee Mason. Mrs. E. NJ Butz
Mrs John Dunlap. Mrs Judge Magee, Mrs. S.
s. Carrier. Mrs. Peter Young. Mrs. E. ]. Nc
Pherson, Ms. Judge Srowe James L. Crayens,
Samuel W. Black and Mrs. A. G. Duncan.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

John James Ingalls,. and his unsocked sntaeo-
mist, by which Ingalls, will let Simpson 60 to
the Senate and Simpson will make Ingalls, the
Alliance candidate for President on the plat
form of that speech on silver-and great
many other topics.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22
A Fit of Post-Mortem Glee.

Detroit Free Press.l
That the cadaver which was recently found in
an alley near the Michigan College of Medicine
was not misused by any of the students of that
institution. but simply leaped from the window
in fit of post-mortem glee. will be pleasant
news. 1t is always agreeable to be assured of
the good behavior of students.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

IF Senator Vests assertion that Senator
Cameron was interested in the silver pool is to
be corroborated. 1t will put the newly elected
Senator from Pennsylvania in very uncom-
Portable attitude. the only mitigation of which,
for him, will be that the exposure did not occur
until after his election was safely secured
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22
Very Cautious Indeed.

Even at this late day natural gas is mystery
to some people.
A church visitor, in the course Of her charita-
ple labors among the poor of this great town,
found woman who was in great distress be-
cause her husband was out of work. The
visitor suggested that he should apply at the
office of certain natural gas company where
laborers were wanted
.Sure an won't do no such thing" was the
voman's reply: do ye be thinkin' that want
to lose me good man? Sure an that natural gas
is so dangerous don't want him to be AGAR.
ryin' it around. ma'amT
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22
DEATHS OF A DAY.
Major e. A. Ludington.

ESPECIAL rELEsRAx TO THE DrsPArdH,
UN1oNTowN, Jan. N.-Major e. A. Ludh9ton
died here this evening at the house Of his sister
Mrs. H. l.. Rankin. Major Ludngton had been
in the service for 20 years, and five years ago he
was placed on the retired list. He 81 years of
are and previous to entering the army he had
been admitted 10 the Uniontown bar.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

IT is now asserted that there are 335, 900
heather in New York City. This does not agree
with the claim of New York that the census
total of 100000 was 200, OOO too small.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

NEW bills for license commissions and
measures to permit the collection of street
improvement assessments are all the rage in
legislative fashions at Harrisburg.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

THE partisan fever has reached the point
at which both parties are equally determined
that no business shall be done at this session
for the benefit of the people.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

LET us hope that the Powers of Europe
will not inform Emperor William that he can
lay his scheme for disarmament before the
marines.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22
Mrs. Julia Q. Havekotte.

Mrs. Julia c. Havekotte, wife of Theo Havoc
kotte, died yesterday at her residence, No. els
Liberty street. Mrs. Havekotte was 50 years ola
The funeral will take place tomorrow afternoon
at the German Evangelical Church, Smithfeli
street.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

The Vice President who makes rulings
one day that he has to take back the next is
likely to come to grief at last.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22
Pity the Fallen Millionaire! !

Terrible thing the way the Blowtons have
suffered since old BIowton failed" said q lady
to me yesterday.
~ haven't heard much about It," replied,
except that the failure is a matter Of millions.
Are they in a hard wayT
Hard way? Well, should say so. They've
had to sell their city mansion and the cottage
at Newport, and the yacht and nearly every
thing they had"
what are they going to do?"
II hear they mean to buy a small house in
the suburbs and economic. Bella tells me she
expects to have to get along with two servants,
and do her own marketing in town."
''Ohi that's too dreadful"
And then such narrowing details Of fallen
fortune were revealed as cannot be laid before
an unfeeling world here. 1t is truly an awful
thing to come down from dozen millions to
beggarly pittance. say. of s., 1000 year.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22
SNAP SHOTS IN SEASON.
THE deaf and dumb are compelled to give
bond. because they cannot give their word.

ARE you one of the Indspensablesf Among
the hosts which make up the living foundation
upon which society rests, vast army of men
could be recruited who really believe that the
structure would come down with crash If they
withdrew their support They are the 1ndis-
pensables. the You-can't-getalone-w without
Mes. Doubtless you have met some of them.
They have impressed you with the idea that
they formed vital part of the gearing or the
shafting which keeps the complex ana huge
machine called life running along surely and
safely. If they were displaced. or cracked, or
laid off for repairs, the motor would wobble and
groan and eventually collapse. SO they
imagine. The world would simply go to the DEM
milton bow vows. You meet the Indispensa-
bles on all the roads Of 1ife-in the mills, the
counting rooms, the shops, the laboratories.
the factories, the schools. the cubby-holes
where the pencils smoothly slide and the pens
scratch in chIll-givng silence, on the sea and on
the shore. They fill inches IN every grade of all
the callings. They ply and think and imagine
that they nurse secret and hold key which
no other being can learn or no other person
turn. You have heard them talk, haven't you?
And did you really become persuaded that they
were indispensable? Surely not. Clever they
NAV be-apt, industrious, secretive, inventive,
vital portion Of mechanism, but not, for all
that, Indispensable. They are merely the little
cogs In the big wheel whose gearing grinds and
grinds and sends the power along the big shaft
to the broad belts which snap over the
polished pulleys in the social shop of
the rumbling old world. When an Indis-
pensable snaps under the pressure the cog can
be replaced without even stopping the motor
or jarring the machinery. He drops out and
some one else drops in. He is not missed. The
grind goes on and on. the structure stands firm
a g ha foiI IN eto NJ lose
nimble fingers What You and have done
Thee and Thine can do. So the shuttle will
never cease to fly under the hands of the
weavers. bringing out the colors that will still
be frightened by the dyers who will handle
yarns still to be furnished by the spinners after
the Indispensable of to-day has been dispensed
with and his memory only recalled by bronze
iu the public square or a white or gray shaft in
the meeting place of the rich and the poor.
MYRRH will harden the gums and gall will
harden the cheek.
WHEN are fishermen like cruel husbandsf
When they give their wives smack, of course.
WHEN Cleveland calls up Central now he
shouts "Hill, Or
THE lawyer who hoodwinks his client prac-
tices deceit.
THE promoters of New Yorks French ball
can give the Yellow Dogs some valuable point
ers on blackguardism.
WHEN does a burglar resemble q pair of bel
lows? When he's a safe blower.
HoGG has been inaugurated Governor of
Texas. If he roots in the right place the other
fellows will do the grunting.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22


you might as we'll be occupying your lot in the
cemetery.
INDIVIDUALS often escape the jaws Of
death by the skin of their teeth.
WHY are the bad Indians like sinners doing
penancef Because they are forced to carry
guns for Miles.
IT will sound strange in Europe to hear Of a
KING dying in America. Kalakua was the first
wearer of crown to visit us and the first to die
under the stripes and stars.
SOME people are so lazy that they growl when
forced to lift their eyes,
THE storm center has shifted to Washington,
where a Southern cyclone Of great energy pre-
walls, with a tendency to move along Pennsyl-
yania avenue and break in the House wing of
the Capitol. There was a general rise in the
mean temperature there. but the force caused a
low pressure area in the Senate end, with sta
tionary indications.
THE Southside women who have been ad-
vised to drink because their husbands do are
playing with FIRE water, and may get scalded.
They Are Not Cowards.
Conductors who may with you fight
Won't punch you unaware.
And, whether in the wrong or right
Will try to knock down fare.
WHY is bookkeeper like snakef Because
he's an adder.
THE man who married one of the Woodruff
sisters is watching the force bill anxiously. He
knows it will affect Tennie c.
WHILE Comstocks society was holding its
annual meeting and lauding themselves on the
work performed in the vice suppressing line,
New York's upper crust were whirling in
vicious frenzy at the French ball. Sort of
vice versa state Of affairs, wasn't it?
EVERY time the murderer snaps his revolver
he breaks the law.
THE politicians are invsterate policy players,
but the people are tIring of their system.
WHY is a minister like messenger boyi Be.
cause he is forced to answer call.
THE imitation of the Illinois air ship SO far is
confined to the stock.
THE psychical cranks are taking spook
census. If Porter was in charge he would count
the tombstones and swear by them.
AN Allegheny husband battered his wife be-
cause she couldn't cook to suit him. He has
cooked his own BROTH fguratively speaking.
The Serpentine Walk.
II your heart is full Of sorrow
Nor feeting sunshine borrow
From the cup
Which cheers but makes you shaky
In the morn,
Or produces visions snaky
Sure,s your born.
II Europe INDUCES in war this year the
voung German Emperor when he reaches the
Rhine will doubtless exclaim: mo cross, no
crown"
THE Congressional Record will soon be unfit
for publication.
If the kings keep on slipping their cables
the foolish people who like royalty will soon be
ruled by petticoats.
JAIL birds are never placed in golden cages.
OrERo, the Spanish dancer, after the cham.
pagne capers she indulged in at New Yorks
naughty ball, should be called Otaro.
WHY Is tugboat like sprinter' Because
it tows line.
MISSOURI declines to pull down her senator.
ial Vest.
CHIEF B1aELow has some sweeping reforms
in his minds eye, WILLIE WINME
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22
A Fireman's Perils.

81 haven't seen anything in the papers," said
well-known AIeghenian yesterday. "about \
little incident OF the Federalstreet fire last
week which might have made that unfortunate
event a disaster of far larger dimensions. l was
standing in ths crowd watching the fire when
learned that a quantity Of gunpowder was
stored In McKnight's store. 1 lost no time in
telling the firemen and generally spreading the
Information among the spectators. The fire.
men and others located the powder and carried
it out in safety, and the crowd kept more re-
spectful distance while this dangerous work
was being done. How much powder there was
1 don't know-some say 500 pounds-but too
much for comfort, anyhow"
At fire in jamestown. N. Y, few days ago
a young clerk in a hardware store acted heroic
ally under very similar circumstances The fre
was well under way and cartridges were pop
ping about in a most unpleasant fashion, when
the clerk remembered that large keg Of
powder was at the back of the store. He ran
into the store and. through the smoke and
fusillade of bullets brought out the keg. This
act averted terrible explosion, and Charlie
Fitch, the boy who did II. Is rightly called .
hero. BY the way, he has relations here.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22
TERMS OF THE DISPATCH.

POSTAGE FREE IN THE UNITED STATES.
DAILY DISPATCH, One Year. 90
DAILY DISPATCH, Per Quarter. 90
DAILY DISPATCH, One Month. 20
DAILY DISPATCH, including Sunday, year. 10 90
DAILY DISPATCH, including Sunday, m'ths 50
DAILY DISPATCH. including Sunday, 1m'th 90
SUNDAY DISPATCH, One Year...-............. 2 so
WEEKLY DISPATCH, One Year.............. Is
TEE DAILY DISPATCH is delivered by carriers at
9!cents per week, or including Sunday edition. at
z 9tcents per week.
pITTsBrrRc THIrRsnAy IAN % 1891
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22
Good Caryers Are Scarce,


"How do you account for the scarcity Of good
carversf' asked matron yesterday.
"Laziness of the men," she replied.
But seriously, it is a fact that good carver
is q rare bird in this latitude. Not one man in
ten can carve even plain joint as it should be
done, and when 1t comes to cutting up turkey
or smaller birds the percentage of failures,
comparative and absolute, is even greater.
Why is this? Our fathers were able to handle
the carving knife with dexterity, and even a
tough duck did not daunt them. 1t will never
do for US to confess that we are not as good as
if not better than, our fathers, but 1t is clear
nevertheless that the art of carvisg, the art
mind you, is dying out I take it that our
fathers are often responsible for this, because
they keep on carving till death cuts them
down, instead of handing over the head Of the
table with it's carving responsibilities to their
sons in succession. This seems to be the only
explanation aside from the one foreigners are
so prone to allege that Americans are SO much
given to abiding in hotels and boarding houses
that they are more and more losing the accom-
plishments and graces which are born of and
adorn home life. And the peculiar disgrace of
the masculine ineptness with the knife is that
mans better half most of the time can carve
all around him, so to speak.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

THE promoters of New Yorks French ball
can give the Yellow Dogs some valuable point
ers on blackguardism.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

Vols. No. 549. Entered at Pittsourg Postofhce.
November Il. lG5z, as second-class matter.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

Business Office-Corner Smithf1eld
and Diamond Streets.
News Rooms and Publishing House
rs, TT and 70 Diamond Street.
EASTERN ADVERTISING OFFICE. ROOM q,
TRIBUNE BUILDING, NEW YORK. where
complete files of THE DISPATCH can always be
found. Foreign advertisers appreciate the con-
venience. Home advertisers and friends of THE
DISPATCH, while in New York, are also made
welcome.
TIE DISPATCH is regularly on sale at
Brentano'S. 5 Union Square. NetO York, AND II
Are. de POpero, Parts, France, tchere anyone
trho has been disappointed at a hotel neaos
stand can obtain IT,
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

HoGG has been inaugurated Governor Of
Texas. II he roots in the right place the other
fellows will do the grunting.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22
THE TOPICAL TALKER.
Fair China Painters.

China painting has been growing steadily and
latterly very fast in this vicinity. For long
time was puzzled to know what attracted
young women, mostly in fashionable attire, to a
rather dingy store in by-street The show
windows had generally nothing more seductive
than few pieces of white china in them. but
all the same from morn till night procession
of fair customers passed In and out Of the store.
Recently discovered that all these women
were amateur painters Of china who brought
their work to the store 60 be burned. This
gave me some clew to the large proportions of
the china-painting cult, il it may be so called.
in these parts.
Ten years ago, am informed, one kiln was
equal to all the china burning required here. and
as a rule not more than one burning a week was
necessary. The business was easily monopolized
by one man, and he did not seem likely to get
rich on it. Now there are four or five china
burning establishments and in addition proba-
bly, dozen private kilns operated by the china
painters themselves. At the largest place in
the two cities half dozen kilns are kept
going all the time, and as about fifty pieces on
the average can be burned in each of these
kilns at one time, it can be realized what a
mighty output Of hand-painted china there Is
in this county. On a single day just before
Christmas over two hundred cups and saucers
were burned at Pittsburg store.
There is no way of finding out how many
amateur china painters there are to-day in the
two Cities but there must be many hundreds Of
them. Under the term amateur 1 include those
who sell their work, but who are not connected
with any factory or store. Some Of these inde-
pendent women have built up a regular and
ever-increasing private trade in china ware Of
their painting, and 1 know of one artist who
filled no less than 100 separate orders for delv-
cry last Christmas. At present women have q
real monopoly of the art outside of the china
making and decorating factories, and very
beautiful and, it is pleasant to add, profitable
pursuit 1t is for them. 1t is no longer an unu-
sual thing to find the entire stock Of china
decorated by the mistress Of the house, and BY
the time the next generation of PIttsburgers
is grown up hand-painted china will rather be
ha rul har ha r,,,or, ta
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

WHY is a tugboat like sprinter' Because
1t tows a line.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

The lawyer who hoodwinks his client prac-
tices deceit.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

OrERo, the Spanish dancer. after the cham.
papne capers she indulged in at New York's
naughty ball, should be called Otaro.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

IT will sound strange in Europe to hear Of a
KING dying in America. Kalakua was the first
wearer of crown to visit us and the first to die
under the stripes and stars.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

MISSOURI declines to pull down her Senate
ial Vest.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

WHEN are fishermen like cruel husbandsf
When they give their wives q smack, Of course
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22
Put Down the Enemy.

An Irishman went into a restaurant In the
Diamond the other dayiro get dinner. As an ap-
petiser he ordered glass Of whisky. Just as he
was raising the glass to his lips his parish priest
touched him on the shoulder and said: Tin,
that the worst enemy you have"
Eyes, your reverence" replied Tim, "but how
often have you told me to love my enemies"
and the whisky disappeared
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

WHEN does a burglar resemble pair of bel
lows? When he's a safe blower.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

WHEN Cleveland calls up Central now he
shouts "Hill, or
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

MYRRH will harden the gums and gall will
harden the cheek.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

CHIEF BIeELow has some sweeping reforms
In his minds eye, WILLIE WINKLE
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

WHY is a bookkeeper like snakef Because
he's an adder.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

IF you are not contented with your lot now,
you might as we'll be occupying your lot in the
cemetery.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

SOME people are so lazy that they growl when
forced to lift their eyes,
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

WHY are the bad Indians like sinners doing
penancef Because they are forced to carry
guns for Miles.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-22

Conductors who may with you fight
Won't punch you unaware.
And, whether in the wrong or right,
Will try to knock down fare.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1891-02-19
SelE.COIltrOl.

An expert and experienced official iu'
an insane asylum says that these lnsti-
tutions are filled with people who have
given to their feelings. The import.
ancc of this fact is altogether too little
appreciated especl''ly by teachers. We
are always talking about the negative
virtues Of discipline, but we rarely
speak of the positive virtues. We dis
cipllne the schools to keep the children
from mischief, to MAINTAIN good order,
to have things quiet, to enable the ch,l.
dren to study. We say slightly that
there cannot be good school without
good discipline. We do not, however,
emphasize us we should the fact that
the discipline of the school, when right.
ly done, is as vital to the future of the
child as the lessons he learns. Disci-
pline of the right kind is IT'S good men
tai training as arithmetic. 1t Is not of
the right kind unless it requires intel
lectual efforts, mental conquests. The
experienced expert, referred to above
Was led to make the remark by seeing
girl give way to the "suks.' THAT
makes insane women" he remarked, and
told the story of IL woman in al asylum
who used to sulk until she became des.
pcrate, and the expert said "fou must
stop it. You must control yourself"
10 which the Insane woman replied.
The tirae to say that was when T was a
girl. l never controlled myself when
l was we'll and now l cannot" The
teacher has a wider responsibility, d
weishtier disciplinary duty than she
suspects. The pupils are not only to
be sontrolled, but to be taught self con.
troll