Los Angeles herald., 1891-12-13
NEW LECToR AMONGST US-oTHER
THINGS.

/ A NEW LEOLOh AmONUSI US-OIh
THINGS.
Our highly 'steemed contemporary,
the Los Angeles Times, to the surprise
of everybody, has set itself up as CEN
sor OF both manners and morals. 1t has
broken up a long and wordy disquisition,
! evidently directed at the HERALD's criti-
cism of portion OF President Harrison 3
message, into a number of articles,
through the agency of the three-em dash
in the middle of the line, whose efficacy
in enticing the reader to further INNER
sion in dull matter is so well I'M
deistood by the printer, and from which
the reader has an instructive desire to
guard himself. This kind of an editorial
article has all the insidiousness of dis
QUESTION which winds up with a mere
tricious reference to St. Jacobs oil.
However indefensible this process may
be. we cannot refrain from, in this in
stance at least, adopting the method Of
the Times. From things evil, we are
told by the divine "Williams," we can
sometimes distill things good.
First our 'steemed contemporary I'M
dertakes to lecture us ON manners. 1t
has good deal to say about 'boors."
The legend goes that Monsieur de Vol
taire once found himself in the chateau
OF distinguished Frenchman, and that
he learned, after he had retired for the
r1irht that nntnrinI1c-nnt nnta h1n-
able had arrived. This able happened
to learn that Monsieur de Voltaire was
stopping in the mansion. He ascer-
tanned the room occupied by the dis
tinguished wit, crept up to his door and
wrote upon it the word Fool" When
Voltaire arose in the morning he saw
the inscription, was little puzzled for
the moment; but, when he saw the
able aforesaid in the drawing room
in the morning he went up to
him, cordially exten led his hand
with marked impresSement, and ex
claimed, "Ah, my dear sir, how
kind it was of you to leave your card on
my door this morning." If an editor of
the HERALD were to be a guest at any
place where newspaper men had as
sembled, and he had heard the word
"boor" applied to any of the fraternity
there assembled he would exclaim, "In
the name of all the gods at once, what
member of the staff of the Los Angeles
Times has arrived since have retired ?"
This would be an improvement on the
old Teutonic refrain which ran, if our
memory deceives US not, "Who's been
here since rs been gomez"
The convenient medium Of the three
EN- dash enables us to recur to this sub
iect without exhausting it. By what
extremity of supreme gall, pushed to
the swapping point of all precedent,
does our 'steemed contemporary dare to
lecture any respectable journal az to
manners? In Pope's Dunciad there is
passage, applied to a pretended wit,
that we venture to apply to pretended |
and mannerist. Substituting |
manners for wit, the passage applies
perfectly. AS to our criticizer as to
as to wit applies the couplet-
sense passed through him no longer is the
same,
For food, digested takes different name
Still availing ourselves OF the ever
ready three-em dash, we get back to
Harrison, Ben, Benny or B enjamin J.
Of that ilk. If ever president OF the
United States gave the country away
and he is the only president OF the
United States that has done SO in our
recollection-t is Harrison, assisted by
his lingo secretary OF state. In addi-
ion to the muddle which has been
made at every stage of our several South
American embroglios, and the surien-
Ter OF the essential American attitude
n the Boring sea controversy, Mr.. Har-
'ison has satisfied Premier Rudini, OF
-taly-vide Rudini'I speech in the Ital-
an parliament-that he is going to
modify the laws of the United States to
uit Italy. Fortunately o Democratic
house of representatives. will prevent
hat!
AHu mere we are! AiGer ldDoTeu Ell
orts to play upon the tom-tom and to
'eat the hew-gag, and to throw in the
Iibrant votes OF the Whangdoodle and
he Gyasticutis, we are actually con-,
ronted with the tamest administration
he United States has ever had! The
pectacle makes patriot, even though
lie be devotee of peace and a Quaker,
FAX wrothl
By the interposition of a few more
hree-em dashes we might say more,
ut we remember that brevity is the !
oul of wit. !
AND now we have labored effort on
le part OF our esteemed evening con-