St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1891-03-15
GLOBE TOWER SHOTS.
The prodigal Republican party has spei
its patrimony and is nearly out of job.

The prodigal Republican party has spent
its patrimony and is nearly out of Il job.
Minister Willy Wally Phelps hastily denies
that he appeared at a public reception in
Berlin dressed i'll knee breeches and other
articles of court apparel. Minister Willy
Wally gives countenance to the bang, but
sternly draws the line at knee breeches
Gen. Lew Wallace ana Secretary Foster
closely resemble each other in personal APP
pearance and they are frequently mistaken
for each other. But Benny Harrison was not
10 be fooled. He knew them apart and
chose-the smaller man of the two.
Once and again Mount Etna is erruptic
AT least the women of that small Hoosier
town are raiding dram shops
Like joey Bagstock. Joey Wheelock
Too, is ''de-vlish sly
And at his party SHES a lock,
Then winss his other eye.
Denver, Colo. is Just now experiencing
the;effects OF robust boom; its mayor has
been legislated out of Office
Ii is true that Gen. Palmer follows in the
~.
footsteps were a long ways apart From this
time on ii is the duty of the Democratic
cohorts of Illinois to march III close order.
Our Nations skipper leaves the helm,
But. oh. such wond 'rous luck,
For Benny, Ruler of the Realm,
Has shot another duck
From Republican sources il is learned that
immense enthusiasm waited upon the re-
cent banquet of the Republican League clubs
at Minneapolis But enthusiasm is easily
created nowadays, and that, too, By means
the most mechanical. 1t chances that in the
pages of history are embalmed the names of
some eminent heroes-some of them eX-Dem-
ocrats, by the way-and it also chances that
the stars and stripes are as dear to the Demo
cratic as to the Republican heart These
premises admitted, let us examine the rhetor-
ical jugglcry resorted to by modern enthusi-
asm evokerS Let us strip the veil of sham
from the face of Republican hypocrisy, and
show how, in a mixed audience of Republic
cans and Democrats, enthusiasm nay be
evoked by shallow oratorical spell5inders.
Model of modern speech delivered by a
modern Republican demagogue:
Ladies and gentlemen: What have we
behind us in our fight for the supremacy of
Republican principles? The gug- gug- guglo-
rious stars-and-stripes CHEERS What
have we before us? Leaders with hearts as
brave and true as ever beat in the breast of
an Abraham Lincoln [cheersl: Ulysses
Grant lcheersl; gallant Phil Sheridan
[cheersl, or a martyred James A. Garfield
Immense enthusiasm and moist eyes in
Democratic war veterans who remember
these patriotic names
The trick is simple enough. The man who
would not cheer these illusions is no true
American; but in what way does all this bun
combe account for Tom Reeds rules or the
inioutous Mckinley bill:
Wild, haggard eyed grief is illustrated in
the Carthage, Mo-, man who is rushing
around town offering s. reward for informa-
ton leading to the recovery of his wife.
In her new play, ''Out of Sight, Miss Ann
ODelia DissiDebar refuses to appear in
tights. This stimulates the conundrum what
is the use of donning tights out Of sight:
Van Chump-IIow is Jones doing in poll
ties?
Di jay Observation-Disclosures stin in the
iing.
Van Chump visibly relieveO he's
all right.