The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1891-07-31

so very poorly for their friends or for an
individual reader.
Perhaps the greatest wonder of all, in
my mind, is I that l don't write better let
tiers myself, for assure you, dear friends,
that understand my own shortcomings
quite as well as you do; but remember,
if you please, that there is q large class
who know the right and yet the wrong
pursue" and SO far as letter writing goes
rank me among them.
After this bit of salutary meekness let
me proceed to rehabilitate myself by
pointing out some Of the most common
faults in the letters l peruse, some of
which faults I confess as my own, and
some others Of which Indignantly deny,
and please don't anybody intimate that
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Compound for sins | am iaclin'd to.
By ding those I have a mind to.
In the first place let US consider letters
of friendship, especially those occurring
in a correspondence. How many per-
sons begin these with apologies for long
silence, 81 don't know what you have
been thinking or saying about me all
this while or, more artlessly, 81 sup
pose you are provoked at me for not
writing" or some other form Of depre-
cation of wrath, and then follows a string
of apologies and minute explanation Of
the reasons why the letter has not been
written sooner and promises Of doing
better in the future.
Now all this is very conceited and
vain, since it takes for granted that
ones letters are Of great value and have
been watched and waited for, whereas,
in point Of fact, your correspondent has
very likely been just as busy and just as
preoccupied as you have been, and has
not had time TO notice that your letter
did not come, or even has been glad that
it did not, because it has not demanded
an answer. One Of the sad lessons of life
is that we are not of as much conse-
quence to anybody else as we are to our
selves, and that very many Of our friends
do not much care whether they receive
a letter from US today or this day week.
My own dearest and Oldest woman friend
and | correspond very seldom, aud never
accuse each other Or excuse ourselves
concerning the gaps between our letters,
and yet VT love each other more and
more deeply as the silent years go on.
Thenext most common fault in friendly
letters is filing them with discussion Of
the person to whom they are written,
advice and suggestions about that per
sons movements or affairs, and ques-
tons as to his or her health, opinions
and domestic circle. OF course, between
intimate and familiar friends all this has
its place, and there are plenty of occa-
sions when the very object Of writing is
to advise or question, or in some fashion
express ones mind about the person TO
whom one writes, but in the ordinary
friendly letter this Is not advisable.
When takes up d letter in a familiar
handwriting one says to ones self: "Ah!
here's a letter from A. Now l shall
hear all the Washington gossip" or,
Now I shall get a little rest from all
this worry and bother Ct business"
But 10 and behold, the friendly letter
is simply a raking over of all the things
which fret and weary you the most:
How are you getting along with your
lawsuit, Or is there any chance that those
bonds or stocks will recoup themselves:
And how is your neuralgia, and did you
ever hear Of this Or that remedy, gener-
ally remedies that you have thrown aside
long ago; Or how you must miss your dear
little dog, and can't you trace the thief?
Or perhaps the letter is filed with adj
vice upon some matter whose true in
wardness" nobody understands but your
self, Or some course upon which you
have deliberately made up your mind
and fixed your resolution, although you
have not announced it tt the world or
ven to your correspondent.
MOI In a friendly letter don't try to
avoid egotism, but rather cultivate it.
Your friend knows all about herself and
her own affairs and surroundings; what
she wants now is to know something
about yours; some brief, bright little ac-
count Of something you have done, some
person you have met, some amusement
whereat you have assisted and where
you have met acquaintance mutual to
you and your correspondent.
Perhaps you live SO quiet a life that
you have no social anecdotes to relate;
perhaps it is SO %uneyentful that you have
done nothing and seen nothing worth
repeating. Well, then, fall back upon
the things not worth repeating so long
as they are wildly in your mind. One
Of the very most amusing letters | ever
read in my life was from a young girl
living a very, very quiet life and max
ing no pretension 10 literary ability. Ii
was all about the adventures Of a piece
of sticky fly paper on a windy day, end
ing with her father setting his silk hat
down upon it, and then, while nobody
could speak for laughter, snatching up
the hat, clapping it upon his head and
rushing out of the house In masculine
contempt of the s~enseless hilarity of his
family.
A very trifling occurrence you will
say, and a very silly letter, but all the
same it CAV. me a good laugh and 4
merry mood, and l have had a pleasant
thought for that girl through all the
years that have rolled between that day
and this.
If you have nothing whatever to tell
about yourself, find some little bit Of
news about other people; not the affairs
of nations, which are generally stupid,
or of public characters, which every one
may read in the newspapers, but of the
people around you. AS for instance,
1--WE have a new Biddy, and when !
told her in making coffee to put in IN
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