Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1891-06-19


broken as / reckoned on" remarked
the deacon. as he stood in the cart and
viewed the proceedings.
They're broke we'll enough, re-
piled Job, rather nettled, "but I'm
strange TO them; nobody but Ike ever
drove them.
"Well. turn them about, said the
deacon. But they paid no heed on any
command. and finally. exasperated,
Job struck them both with the goad.
and they started at full run down the
road. Clatterty bang! the cart went
and both Job and the deacon were
compelled TO hold on the cart-stakes to
prevent being bounced out of the cart.
stop 'em Stop emf shouted the
deacon. Il want to get out" Whoa!
whoa! whoa! we varmintsw But the
oxen only tossed their horns and ran
the faster. stop 'em, can't ye"
Job was downright mad by this
time. Stop 'em yourself, you old
fool" snapped he, 'you know rs much
how To stop 'em rs | do"
"We'll be chucked out and killed"
shouted the deacon, as the cart banged
over a stone.
The oxen were now thoroughly
frightened and running away for fair,
and both men were badly scared and
holding on for dear life. All at once
an idea struck Job.
''Say, deacon. can't you talk some
sea talk to 'em? That's what I've
alters heard Ike talk TO 'em." he called
out as the cart bumped along.
Brother Haines, such sea talk as
I've heard amt proper fer pillar OF
the church to repeat and I'll call
meetin on you fer this if we git out
alive " replied the deacon. with AS
much dignity as he could assume while
holding TO the stake.
'Do try, deaconr' shouted the terri
fed job; lit may save our lives" Just
then the cart gave fearful lurch and
the deacon banged his head against
the stake he was holding TO with con-
siderable force. This made him boil
ing mad in addition to his fear.
Jump aloftr' he shouted. "Splice
the main brace! SILVER my timbers!
Pipe all hands TO grog! and then as
that had no effecton the frantic team,
Boat ahoy!" and then losing all con-
troll of himself. "Ahoy! Alloy! drat
We, We blankety blank brutes" and the
deacon let out such string of profan-
ity that job turned a shade or two
paler.
While this was going on the oxen
had gotten over considerable ground.
The people along the road CAPPED in
open-mouthed establishment to see two
such staid citizens going along so furi-
ously with an OK team, and were terri
bly, scandalized at their apparent hi
larity.
Ike, totally unconscious OF what was
going on at home, was plodding along
toward his chum's when he heard n
fearful clatter coming behind him.
He turned, and could hardly believe
his eyes There came his pets Jack
and Billy at furious pace, and his
uncle and the deacon in the cart.
Stop 'em, Ike! stop 'emm shouted
his uncle, when he saw Ike.
Ike stepped to one side of the road
and as the cattle dashed up called out
Delay, Jack! Delay. Billyw At the
sound OF the familiar voice and COM
mand they stopped at once and went
quietly up to their young master.
IN have the law of you for this,
Job Haines." snarled the deacon. as
he painfully descended from the cart
And I'll call church on you" re-
torted job, as he rubbed his bruises.
| won't belong to any church with a
man that kin swear like you kin. A
purity deacon you bel"
If had brat like that I'd skin
him alive roared the deacon, as he
glared at the bewildered Ike.
Isaac, take them cattle home at
once. said his uncle. LAS for this
wicked man here | shall never notice
him again"
Ike took the cattle home. His uncle
walked His aunt told him about the
contemplated sale, and though he eX-
pressed commiseration for his uncle
it is doubtful il he felt any. His aunt
said it served them just right. Ike
kept his oxen.