davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12
"WHAT AN ASS AM II"

The ass thought himself as fine look
ing as his neighbor, the horse, until he,
one day, saw himself in the looking
glass, when he said "What an ass am l J"
Are there not scores of people who
cannot see themselves as others see
them? They have bad blood, pim-
pies, blotches, eruptions, and other kim
dred disfgurements. All these annoy
Ing things could be entirely eradicated,
and the skin restored to "lily white
ness" if that world-famed remedy, DR..
Pierce's Golden Medical Discovery,
were given a fair trial.
1t cures all humors, from the ordi-
parry blotch, pimple or eruption to the
worst scrofula, or the most inveterate
blood-taints, no matter what their ma
ture, or whether they be inherited or
acquired. The "Golden Medical Dis
covery" is the only blood purifier
guaranteed to do just what it is rec
commended to, or money refunded.
WORLDS DIsPENsARY MEDICAL AS
ISOLATION, Proprietors, No. 6e3 Main
Street, Buffalo, N. 7,
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12
HAVE WOMEN ANY SENSE.
This Writer Says Newspapers Don't Seem
10 Think They Have Bit
p,,e;

One OF the cleyerest newspaper women
know confessed to me recently that she had
become an utter pesslmlst in her opinion
of newspapers and the stuff they print
Her writing is principally along the line
OF specials supposed to be of general in
terest to women and adopted for the col
ums or departments designed for the fem.
mime mind. She also handles for her own
paper most of the out-of-town exchanges,
| and she has fonnd it she says, to be an
almost invariable rule that he sillier and
more trashy of her screeds are widely
copied in the newspaper, while these which
are of better sort, in both subject and
treatment are left unnoted.
The fact is" said she, IF | should
write as we'll as | can, so that really could
take pride and pleasure in it, should
very soon lose my situation. If on the
on the other hand, could bring myself
to write perfect trash which | see
is most popular could double my income.
AS it is | reconcile my self-respect and my
pocketbook by pursuing medium
course"
have talked with many experienced
newspaper women on this topic of late
and their testimony is invariably like that
quoted above. Many, however, unite
with her in drawing from these facts an
erroneous conclusion to the effect that
the women readers of the newspaper dc
not want good things, nor even know them
when they see them. The contrary is
proved by the success of really frst-class
periodicals designed especially for women
such as Harper's Bazaar, the Woman s
Journal, Good Housekeeping, and these
newer claimants of nOnu1ar favor the
Business Woman's Journal, the Woman s
Cycle, and the like; while the high-class
monthlies confidently count on three.
fourths of their readers being women.
The fact is that women have no voice
perusal in the newspapers. With two OF
three notable exceptions among
our large newspapers, the women :
departments are edited by men. The
stuff furnished by the syndicates comes
next; and the articles to be used are usual.
ly chosen by men who almost invariably
select the most fantastic and improbable
the stanglest and loudest. When a paper
has woman writers upon its staff even
who are expected to furnish original arti.
Giles for the woman S column, they seldom
have much liberty. writing usually only
what is ordered, while the final authority
accepts or condemns remains a man. who
knows nothing about it.
He Gust introduced) -"What a very
homely man that gentleman near the piano
is, Mrs. Hopscn." She-''Isn't ne? That
| is Mir. Hopson. He, equal to the occa
sion-'Oh. indeed How true it is, Mrs
Hopson, that the homely men always get
the prettiest wives,
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12
German,
Syrup
For Coughs & Colds.

John F. Jones, Edom, Tex. writes,
| have used German Syrup for the
past six years, for Sore Throat,
Cough, Colds, Pains in the Chest
and Lungs, and let me say to any
one wanting such a medicine
German Syrup is the best.
B.W. Baldwin, Gainesville, Tenn,
writes: have used your German;
Syrup in my family, and find it the'
best medicine l ever tried for coughs
and colds. 1 recommend it to every
one for these troubles. d.
R. Schmalhausen, Druggist, Of
Charleston, Ill writes: After trying
scores Of prescriptions and prepare
tons l had on my files and shelves,
without relief for very severe cold,
which had settled on my lungs, I
tried your German Syrup. 1t gave
me immediate relief and a perma-
nent cure. q
G. G. GREEN, Sole Manufacturer,
Woodbury., New Jersey, U. s. A.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12
TENDERNESS.
ALL THE YEAR ROUND.

Not unto every heart is Gods gift
OF simple tenderness allowed: we rect
With love in many fashioes when we lift
First to our lips life's waters. bitter sweet:
Love com upon with reslstiess power
OF curbess passion and with headstrong will;
1tplays around like April breeze and shower;
Or calmly flows rapid stream, and still
1t comes with blessedness unto the heart
That welcomes it Alright, or-bitter fate
1t wrings the bosom with fierce a smart
That love, we cry, is crueler than hate
And Them ah, me- When love has ceased to
bless,
Our broken hearts cry out for tenderness?
We long for tenderness like that which hung
About us, lying in mothers breast;
seltess feeling, that no pen or tongue
Can praise Alright, since silence sings it best;
A love far removed from passions heat
AS from the chilliness of its dying fire:
A love to lean when the falling feet
Begin to totter and the eyes to tire;
In youths brief hey day hottest love we seek,
The reddest rose we grasp-but when it dies
God grant t. at later blossoms. voets meek
May spring for us beneath lifes autumn skies
God grant some loving one be near to bless
Our weary way with simple tenderness
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12
THIS IS GENUINE DEVOTION.
Skin from Mr.. Wick to be Grated on to
His Wife.

A case of skin grating by wholesale is
among the operations to be performed at
Bellevue Hos pital. The story has been
told of how Minnie Emma Wilcke met
with a terrible accident the day after
Christmas in the cooperative laundry, at
Eighth avenue and Twenty third street.
Her husband. Herman Wick, was fore
man there, and she had gone to call on
him. She got up on bench to close an
open window. Just above her head was
the shafting which ran the laundry ma
chinery. The wind blowing in the open
window blew her luxuriant hair over the
revolving shaft. She did not notice it,
however, but turned to jump to the floor
She hung suspended by the Lair for just a
moment, and then fell TO the floor, her
scalp completely torn from her head.
the wound extended So far down on the
eyebrow, ans consequently the power to
control the eyelid.
In this condition she was taken to Belle
vue hospital. The scalp was taken there
wrapped in a newspaper. House Surgeon
Woods at once had it shaved of its hair.
in the hope that it could be replaced on
the woman's head. Forty-f7e min
utes had elapsed, however, and it
was found that the scalp would
not adhere. Bit by bit the flesh
died, and was cut away until none was
left. During all this time the woman dis.
played remarkable fortitude. Before the
accident she had been extremely pretty
but after it she was hideous beyond de
scription. In spite of her knowledge OF
this she has never lost consciousness ar
hope. Her young husband has been to see
her every day.
A day or two ago the surgeons suggested
to him that the operation of skin graft
ing would be necessary in order to cover
the raw flesh of Mrs. Wilck's head
Without hesitation. he volunteered to al.
low them to take such skin from his body
as was needed. In about a week the
operation will begin. The skin must be
grated bit by bit. 1t will be taken from
| the husbands thigh in strips three inches
| long by an inch wide as it is required
| He is big, sturdy fellow, and the opera
ton will not be part cularly painful to
| him. as the scalpel will only remove the
| outer skin. He will carry the scars always
however, to remind him of his devotion to
| his young wife.
| When the operation is finished Mrs
WiIck's head will, of coures, be as bald a:
billiard ball, but her husband has recon
! icled her to this by promise to buy hel
the finest wig in New York. The sur
geons have promised to use all their skill
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12
THE DUTIES OF THE HOSTESS.
On Her Tact aud Intelligence Depends Her
Guests Comfort.
Ladies', Hama Io,,rrnI

Ldules Home journal
All the beautiful decorations on the table
Will AMOUNT to nothing unless the hostess
herself wears, as decoration, charming
manner and an absolute ignoring of any.
thing except that which will give pleasure
to her guests. If mistakes should occur
1t will be wiser for her not to see them.
II an awkward servant should stumble and
upset dish she should be so EQUITABLE as if
some one had thrown a crown of roses
about her. While it is her duty to permit
no guest to go neglected, it is also
her duty not to seem futtered
or worried, and she is the best hostess al
ways who manages to make people feel
most at ease.
Don t attempt to do much unless YOU have
servants who are capable of carving ont
your orders. A simple dinner, well served.
is always better form than an elaborate one
badly served, and with half cooked hos
tess at the head of the table Invite peo-
pie who will hel p make your dinner a sue
cess, people who will talk we'll and vet do
not talk too much Flashes of silence are
as much of an art In conversation as are
flashes of wit. Put together the people
who will grow Interested In each other,
and under no circumstances yield to the
selfish desire of some young woman who
wants to lie near somebody who won t be
interested in her at all, and who will in
this way cause rift 10 the harmony you
desire to achieve Have your table as
prettily decorated as you can, have your
linen as Immaculate as possible, have every
thing hot, as hot as it can be, and every
thing cold, we'll iced. Do not make the
mistake of serving anything tepid; and as
for yourself be as cool as your ice, as
bright as the candle light, as charming as
the flowers and as sweet as The bonbons
that means dinner is over.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12
SHILOH'S
CONSU N PTI0N
CURE.

fhe sueceS- Of this Great Cough Cure l.
without n parallel IN the history of medicine.
All druggists are authorized to sell it on pos
hive guarantee, test that no other cure can sue
sessfully stand. That it may become known,
she Propretors, at an enormous expense, are
placing Sample Bottle Free into every home
Ia the United States and Canada. If you have
. Cough, Sore Throat, or Bronchitis, use it, for
4 will cure you. Ii your child has the Group,
q Whcoping Cough, use it promptly and relief
b sure. If you dread that insidous disease
Consumption, use it; Ask your Druggls, 10,
tr.oo. If your Lungs are sore or Back lame
Ase Shiloh's Porous Plaster, Price IS cts.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12

to restore her lost eyebrow and ear. The
eyebrow operation will be made at once.
1t will be plastic process. Some of the
skin from Mrs. Wilek's own body will he
used for the new brow. Of course. there
will be 10 hair on it, but the natural arch
will be restored and power giving to con-
II oil the dropping cyclic. No effort will
be made to put a left ear on until the
scalp is restored.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12
Bronchitis Is cured by frequent small doses
of Piso's Cure for Consumption.

An interesting heathenish usage exists
among the Polieshooks Ga Ruthenian tribe)
in Volhynia.. A bride being led to the church
small fire is built for the purpose on the
road, and the relatives of the groom dispose
themselves in files on both sides of the road
to see the bride pass over it. They believe
that lf the girl is not virtuous the fire must
harm her
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12

General Longstrcet is giving all his leisure
time to his history of the war of the rebel
lion, with the expectation of finishing it be-
fore the year is out. He was in Atlanta re-
Gently, and the sight of his white head in
the routanda of the hotel brought score OF
veterans about him to talk over old times.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12
A PECULIARLY OF AUSTRALIA.
More English than the United States,
Canada, South Africa.
February Century.

OF all the countries which have been
originally settled by ofshoots of Great
Britain it has the population which Is
most exclusively British. No other Euro
pean nation has ever held any part of it.
nor has the drift of continental emigra-
ton been directed to its shores. No
weaker race has got, or, as ! shall have to
show later, is likely to get, such a footing
there as will enable it to confuse the forms
of national growth Australia is more
Anlgo-Saxon than the United States, with
their negro millions and their steady in
flow of continental emigrants; more
Anglo-Saxon than Canada, with its con-
siderable fraction Of French population;
than South Africa, with its Dutch Beers
and native races; than any country save
Great Britain itself Under the sunny
skies of the southern hemisphere and al
most purely British stock has continent
to itself as an untitled sheet on which to
write the history Of its development.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12
have. and if I can successfully warn othefs
from the dangerous path in which l once
walked, am willing to endure all profess
sional and personal consequences.
j. B. HENION, M. ID.
ROCHESTER,, n. Y, Dec. 80.

Newman, Ga, Herald: Panther Creek
district can boast of the biggest egg eater
IN the world, IN the person of Joe Burks.
who measures six feet and eleven inch =
high In his stocking feet. Mr. Rurks told
u that not long since be ate $50 eggs at
one time ana felt like be had only var
taken of a small snack. He also ate three
hearty meals afterward in less than FIVE
hours.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12

Did you ever go within mile of soap
factory? If so you know what material
they make soap of. Dobbins' Electric Soap
factory is as free from odor as q chair fac
tory. Try it once. Ask your grocer for it.
Take no imitation
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12
Established 1855.

Dresses, Gents's Clothing, Feathers, Gloves,
etc, Dyed or Cleaned. Plush Garments
Steamed at Otto Pietch's Dye Works, 246
w. Water St., Milwaukee. Send for Circu-
lar.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12

The Abghasians, a mountain tribe of
Caucasia. foll1w the very primitive Gus
tom of stealing wives for themselves. If a
young man kidnaps girl he likes, he
makes her his wife whether she is agreeA-
bile to the match or not. This gives rise
to frequent fights between families o. the
tribe. which never end without human
sacrifices. But if the kidnapped girl likes
the man who has taken her, she acts as
the Sabinian women in Ancient Rome did
When her family declare war against her
groom. she runs to meet them and to ap-
pease them, and if they don t listen to her
entreaties she joins her husband in fight
ing against her own kin.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12

COUGHS AND HOARSENESS.-The irri.
tation which induces coughing Immediately
relieved by the use of "BrotOn's Bronchial
TrocheS'' Sold only in BOXES.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12

The memoir of jeff Davis, just published,
contains the confederate proclamation pro-
claiming General Butler an outlaw and an
enemy of mankind, and ordering his execu-
ton immediately nnnn hia npprehension
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12

"WHEN Stevens get tidy they polish the
bottoms of the pans" When servants are
given SAPOLIO they are never tired OF
cleaning up!
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12
For D1soRDERED LIVER try BEEcHAM's PILL.

Adding the first figure to the second in
1891 gives us the third, and subtracting the
fourth from the third gives us the second.
And if we add all the figures we get the num-
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12

By actual count $50 young women have
taken up timber claims in western Washing
ton during the past six months.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12
WHICH OF THEM WON THE BET
Result of the First Appearance of Bicy Gle
in Country Town

in a Country Town.
The first bicycle had reached Chadwick,
and as it stood in its crate on the little
depot platform, everybody in town came
up to examine it.
can ride tnet thing?' questioned old Silas
Brink
That's what they say" said long lank
young Simpson. II amt seed hit done,
but the agent says hits easy"
''An' only them many wheels?"
''Two's er huff. !"
''I'll bet you my hat hit kant be did?'
"All right, responded Simpson: putter
up
Just at the moment the arrangements of
the wager were completed, dapper young
man come up, and with strong arm
pulled the Stats from the crate He took
the glittering machine out gave its pedals
few whirls, nimbly jumped into the sad
die and was off like the wind, down the
gravel road.
"There!" exclaimed Simpson. before
the bicycle had got thirty feet away, "gim-
me that hat ~
1t was ill-Iuck or pride or something
else that made the young man run into a
small rock. and nature did the rest. The
machine stopped and the rider went over
into the road. When the doctor got
throgh and put him on the train for home
old ST and Simpson were arguing over
who won the bet.
He had shown his ability to ride, Simpson
said, but the old man still declares that
bicycles are a failure.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12

The Massachusetts legislature has been
petitioned to buy sword of George Wash
ington for $50, 600
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12

Miss Dorcas Deane, aged eighty-three the
pioneer public school teacher of Adrian,
Mich, died sunday morning, She went to
in the present limits of that city.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12

CRYING all the time. Poor child. know
what makes you SO peevish and cross.
Mother must get you a box OF those sweet
little candies called DR.. Bulls Worm De-
stroyers By mail, 25 cents. John D.
Park, Cincinnati, Ohio.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12
The Indian Question

Has been the absorbing topic lately. A
facetious correspondent says: '.If the
agents, instead of dosing the poor Indians
palates and destruction of their stomachs,
had sold them Shiloh's Consumption Cure,
the only reliable cough cure, palatable to
the taste and instantaneous in effect, they
would ali be on the reservations yet" THIS
is doubtful, but certainly nothing creates
more alarm than cough-nothing cures as
consumption. 1t is the first in the estima-
ton of all who have used it in throat or
lung troubles. Remember Shilohs Cure.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12

WASHINGTON is entertaining the In
dian chiefs who led III the recent Dakota
war.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12
LOTTERY Mail Matter Seized.

CAMDEN, \. j., Jan. 2l-Po Postmaster
Browning made his third seizure to-day of
lottery mail matter addressed to residents
of this city. The matter consisted of about
seyenty-fiye circulars of the Louisiana Lot
terry company, stating that drawing of the
lottery would be held on the nth day of
February, and that all tickets drawing less
than 81 900 would be cashed at an address in
Boston, and those drawing over that amount
would be cashed at New Orleans.
In accordance with the instructions he has
received from Washington, Postmaster
Browning forwarded the entire lot to Post
master General Wanamaker.-N. y. Sun,
Jan. 22d.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12

An old colored woman living in Atchison
used to prepare herself every night for
death by dressing in a blue gown, and she
was always surprised to find herself alive
the next morning. She kept this up until
she wore out three or four blue dresses and
then she Quit
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12

The latest thing in boycotts is that inaugu-
rated by the editors of the newspapers of
Glasgow, Scotland. 1t grows out of the
great railway strike now in progress. The
orators of the strikers, it is alleged, have
been persistent in their villifcation of the
reporters appointed to attend their meet
ipr
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12

F. j. CHENEY & CO., Toledo, o.
Sold by Druggists, rs cents.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-02-12
STATE OF OHIO, City OF TOLEDO,

FRANK j. CHENEY makes oath that he is
the senior partner of the firm of F. J.
CHENEY q Co., doing business in the City of
Toledo, County and State aforesaid, and that
said firm will pay the sum of ONE HUN
DRIED DOLLARS for each and every case
of Catarrh that cannot be cured by the use
of HALLS CATARRH CURE.
FRANK J. CHENEY.
Sworn to before me and subscribed in my
presence this 9th day of December, A. D.
1885,
~ A. W. GLEASON,
( SEAL Notary Public,
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken internally and
acts directly on the blood and mucous
surfaces of the system. Send for testimoni-
ais, free.
F. j. CHENEY & CO., Toledo, o.
EYSold by Druggists, rs cents.
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1891-11-11
TINE LIMITED,
Drs. Darrin Will Soon Close Their
Offices in This City.

Drs. Darrin contemplate soon closing
their offices IN Seattle and viii return TO
their head Office in Portland, Or, where
they are permanently located. Parties
desiring 10 see them can DO so at once al
the Normandy, corner Third and james
streets. Seattle, Wash.
Office hours from 10 10 5 daily; even
inss, 10 {; Sundays, 10 10 II.
They make a speciality OF all diseases of
the Eye. Ear, Nose and Throat. and all
nervous, chronic and private diseases.
such as Loss of Manhood. Blood Taints.
Syphilis Gieet. Gonorrhma, Structure.
Spermatorrhea. Seminal Weakness, or
Loss of Desire or Sexual Power in man or
Woman. All peculiar Female Troubles
Irregular Menstruation, Leucorrhea, Dis
placements, etc, are conndentialiy and
successfully treated, and will under no cir
cumstances take a case that they cannot
cure or benefit. Consultation tree.
Charges reasonable. Cures of private
diseases guaranteed and never pub
ushed in the papers. Most cases can re-
ceiye home treatment after q visit TO the
doctors office. Inquiries answered and
circulars sent free.