Los Angeles herald., 1891-05-11
THE WRONG ANDERSON.

We are afraid that our esteemed con-
temporary. the Times, is becoming
giddy. Its egotistic trumpetings are
making the circumambient air hoccu-
lent, to employ French word which
means state of approaching precipita-
ton. The Times was in danger of pre-
cipitating compliments on itself up to
the standard of foodtide. 1t has al
ready drenched itself considerably, and
Noah's washout would have been moth
ing to the way it would have doomed
itself in subsequent issues but for a
misadventure whose salient features the
HERALD will proceed to recount.
First appeared one of those wonderful
cartoons, go numerous in the Times,
which recall that knowledge of figure
drawing and perspective which was in
vogue in the days of Rameses the Two
Times, of happy memory, in Egypt.
Underneath this effigy of all that is un
utterable in art and execrable in taste,
appeared the following, in italics:
The master of the Robert and Minnie
has the honor of being arrested by the
representative of the Los Angeles Times
at San Pedro See dispatches.
Kissing is said to be prologue to play,
and this preliminary growing was simply
Introductory to the chanticleer perform
ances of our contemporary. In its ed
itorial columns it got off this modest
bouleversement:
After vast amount of hullaballoo;
dozens of orders scattered all over the
country, and an expenditure of hum
dreds OF dollars in kilograms, the cap
ture OF the Robert and Minnie was LETT
for Deputy United States Marshal N. o.
Anderson, agent at San Pedro for the
Times, terms 50 cents a month, strictly
in advance.
The foregoing but family expresses
the jubilant spirit of our contemporary.
1t was the great 81 am" the Jupiter
Tonans of current events in Southern
California. Visions of ecstatic glory
swan before it's eyes. 1t and its agent
had really succeeded in capturing the
Robert and Minnie after that vessel had
carefully delivered its consignment to
the Itata. Here was an international
glory. What wonder that it should re-
cur to the matter, as thus, still in the
editorial columns;
Deputy United States Marshal N. o.
Anderson, who seized the now notorious
contraband schooner Robert and Min
ME, is the agent OF the Times at San
Pedro. If the United States navy and
the department OF justice require any
further assistance sin this ere war" let
them address this Office with stamp for
return answer.
''This 'ere war" evidently could not
be prosecuted without the aid of our
contemporary and its agent. Together
they were able to capture an unarmed
schooner after it had safely executed its
mission, got rid of its arms and wanted
to come into Wilmington and take on
water and stores, and get ready for sea.
But soft you now! The Anderson was
not their Anderson. He was horse OF
different color. He was another An
derson altogether. The poet asks
'what's in name?" Ordinarily not
much You can't make hollyhock diff
luSt bllO vi u UuDcIOSG ny
it camellia. But still this Anderson
this deputy United States marshal
this Capturer of the Robert and Minnie
was not the San Pedro agent of the
Times. He was not even cousin ger
man to that other Anderson. The
Times will now in vain sing, John An
derson, my 10 John" That journal of
sweetness and light had nothing to do
with the real captor of the Robert
and Minnie. The two men do not even
speak when they pass by. otis true,
tits pity, and pity It's, tits true"
Hence these steers of our contempo-
rary this morning, and hence the efforts
of its noble helmsman to reach the CEN
ter of his coat-tails with his heels.
Twas ever thus" etc., etc.