The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-10-25
Fur VIII Fly in the Fassett Family.

Candidate Fassett appears to be in a
fair way to realize upon that old scriptursl
adage, which sets forth that "a mans great
est foes are those of his own household
Under circumstances over which he had
no control" 1t doth appear from the evil
dence that the Hon. J. Sloat Fassett early
in life involuntarily came into possession OF
cousin several degrees removed. Possibly
Mr.. Fassett now wishes that he had re-
moved several degrees further away while
he was about it. Be that as 1t may, the
cousin met tho candidate the other fine
day. According to his statement the
cousin chased the candidate a considerable
distance for the purpose of meeting him and
talking over family matters" Evidently
the candidate was not right ripe for that
sort Of a discussion just then. So far from
hearty and healthy participation in that
ever Joyous diversion the callous and soul
less candidate turned his face irrelevantly
away from the fascinating flow of domestic
conversation and gazed vacantly through
his car window across the broad expanse of
the tufted turnip fields and away DER the
lea, so to speak. Anon he would then turn
to the political followers with whom he was
surrounded and make desultory remarks
having no sort Of bearing upon "them
family matters"
Therefore Cousin Oatcake Fassett vows
that he never was snubbed SO hard in his
life. 1t riled him and made him hot under
the collar. Hence b-l o-o-dl Metaphorically
speaking Cousin Oatcake is loaded for bar,
and has political cheese knife up each
sleeve aud a further supply down his back
and in both of his caDacious bootlegs. They
are ground down keen and they are mo ls'us
anxious to get at somebody's vitals.
Still the cousin admits that when he went
to meet the candidate he only did it because
he was proud Of his relative who had received
the republican nomination for governor of
New York. No desire to help him in any
way seems TO have entered the simple old
farmers head. Only curiosity. That's all.
After he had been duly introduced in the
orthodox way and promptly claimed kin
greatly to the astonishmelt OF the candi-
date he was in turn sorely surprised that
"them family matters" didn't at once claim
his relati YES attention.
Yet Cousin Oetcake manifested some little
tisan servitu lie of the candidates long poiti-
cal record failed to attract his foad relative.
1t was the fact that he was a party nominee
for big office that inspired Cousin Oat-
cake to "feel proud Of him." Considering
that his new-found cousin was only the nom
inee of the Republican party the old mans
family pride seems to be rather exec ;sively
susceptible to the exhilarating influences of
excitement. Nevertheless he very en-
phatically declares that a candidate for
governor who will not stop short in his
canvass amid a crowd Of politicians and
strangers to talk ovsr family matters" is
'too mean and unprinciplsd to hold the
Office" Ergo he's "agin him"
When a man starts up in the world he
usually acquires great many new rela-
tives and friends that he never heard Of
before who are eager to climb upon his
back and soar along with him. Candidate
Fassett is by no means the first ambitious
man to be so afflicted.