davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30
A Unique Method OF "CrIbbln.. ~

The following incident occurred in
Scotland: A preliminary examination
in connection with a bursary was held
in one of the towns of Lanarkshire, the
place of examination being the parish
school.
When the morning of the examina-
ton arrived one Of the competitors was
noticed to be wearing a pair of spec
tacles. As this was a new departure
on his part, some remarks were of
course made, but he explained it by
saying that his eyes were naturally
weak, and he had put spectacles on
Just for that day, to counteract the
effect of too continuous writing. This
appearing satisfactory, no further notice
was taken of it.
However, during the progress of the
examination, he was noticed frequently
to look intently on the desk, as il
searching for something. This oc
CURED so often that at the conclusion
the examiner asked him what he ha6
been doing. He, however, replied thai
he had done it to relieve his eyes.
Being, however, still dubious, the ex
aminer then asked permission to lool
at the spectacles, on which he discov
cred that they were strong magnifiers
His suspicious being aroused, he pu
them on and examined the desk, OF
which he discovered various figures ant
notes traced with some fine instrument
in the woodwork. Seeing that ex
posure was inevitable the competito
made full confession, on which it ap
peared that he had entered the room
the night before through the window
and by the light Of candle traced will
q needle notes on the more Difficult
subjects on which he expected to be ex
amined. The use of the spectacles wa
necessary in deciphering them, owinI
to the minute characters in which the,
were written. London Bits.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30
AN OLD PHYsIc GARDEN.
It Was Leased to the ApothecarIes' Com
pany In 1878 and Still Exists.

II Was Lehsed to the ApOthecaries' Conn
pany In 1918 and Still Exists.
The proposal to hand over to the
builder the Apothecaries' Physic gar
den, facing the river of Chelsea, has
had or good, result. 1t has ELECTED
the fqt to the great relief of all lovers
of2;ctnresque London, that the condi-
tiVissof its bequest save it from the
fate which has overtaken Gerard's gar
den in Holborn, and Tradescant's gar
den at Lambeth, its older rivals. The
ga1en, which is the oldest of its kind
England, was leased to the Apothe-
fries' company by Lord Cheyne in
S73, and in 1922 was finally presented
70 the company by Sir Hans Sloane,
whose statue, erected eleven years later,
itill adorns it,
Evelyn alludes in his diary to visit
10 'the Apothecaries' garden of sim
piles" "well stocked with plants under
Morgan, skillful botanist," and he
mentions among the rarities he saw
there "the tree bearing jesuit's bark,
which has done such wonders in quar-
tan agues," a tulip tree and tea
shrub. Evelyn's friend Pepys, too
must have delighted in the wonders Of
the garden.
He records with patriotic pride thai
1--WE have the best walks of gravel in
the world, France having none, nor 1t
ally, and our green of our bowling al
leeis is better than any they have" ant
he approves the existing fashion o
gardens to make them plain" "onl!
with a little statues, or pots, which
may be handsome, and so filled will
another pot of such or such a flower o.
greene as the season of the year viii
bear"
Here at Chelsea was made, in 1884
one of the earliest attempts to over
come the English seasons, and rear tn,
flowers. of SUMMER climes by the aid o
artificial heat, which was obtained b.
placing charcoal embers in q hole in tn,
floor of the greenhouse. During tn
management of Philip Miller, eth
Prince of Gardeners" from 1722 t.
1771), the gardens acquired an almos
unrivalled reputation throughout Eu
rope. The are happily safe in tn
custody of The Apothecaries' society
by whom they are maintained for tn
use of the medical schools Of London. =
Black and White.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30
A Cloud OF Witnesses.

We know OF no medicine that has so
many testimonies to its efficiency as
S. S. S., the gteat blood purifier,
Many of the best known people in the
country certify to the marvellous re-
suits it has wrought in the various
forms of disease for which tits recon-
mended, These testimonials come.
not alone from persons who have been
relic 1ed Of their suflerlngs, by s. S. S.
but from people who have witnessed
the effects of the medicine. Practic
ing physicians, druggists, pharma-
cists--in fact, all who have had an OPP
portunity of observing the cures
brought about by this great blood
remedy-bear wiling testimony to it,
efficacy. In its field, which is wide
one, covering some Of the most serious
ailments of humanity, S. S. S has ne
rival.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30
In Obedience to Law.


By Associated Press to The Comet.
GALVESTON, April 25.-Every rail
road in Texas was represented at the
meeting in this city yesterday to de-
wise plan to comply with the State
law, which goes into effect the 18th Of
June, compelling all colored passen-
gers to be provided with separate
coaches. The plan OF w. F. Siddons,
Master Mechanic Of the International
& Great Northern, was adopted. His
is portable partition, and each coach
may be divided for the accommoda-
ton of colored passengers as the mum
Der requires.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30
District Conference Program.

For the Greeneyille District Holston
Conference, NJ, f. Church, 70 be held
in Johnson City, July 92-25 1891,
TO preach the opening sermon
Wednesday, July %, at 7;S0 o'clock,
p. m, Rev. T. S, Walker; alternate,
Rev j. L, Nicely,
Is the modern Sunday school a sue
cess?-Rev, j, d, Droke.
The importance of child culture in
the church-Rev, I. II. Hodge
The class meeting, for whom in
tended-Rev, ], L, Nicely.
The powers OF the District Confer
enee-Rev 7, B. Russell.
Deeds for church property-Rev, w
7. Senter.
Home Missions-Rcy, W. NJ, Chris,
tial.
Our Itincront systcm-Rey. T, S
Walker.
Christianity VS., infdelity-Prof JOS
II. Ketron,
Is the Bible studied now as thor
oughly as in the post?-Rcy. NJ. II
Monroe.
Confidence, if lost, can it be full.
restored?-Rev. S. G. Kotron.
| What are some Of the hinderances il
the way of progressing Christianity
| d. w. Remine.
The modern evangelists, has thei
work proved to be permanently bene
fetal and should it be encouraged
| Rev. w. b. Baldwin.
The committee would most respect
| fully urge all members of the Distric
| Conference to study the several sui
| jects presented and come prepared t
fully discuss them.
BY order of the committe,
WILEY NJ. CHRISTIAN, See
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30
Ammonia Poison,

Many people are slowly absorbing
ammonia poison without knowing it.
The use of ammonia in the Inanufac-
lures has greatly increased of late, anu
it is unquestionably used as an adul-
terant in certain food preparations
Official analyses have plainly showed
its use even in such cheap articles of
every day consumption as baking pow
ders. The continued absorption of am
monia in even minute quantities as an
adulterant in food is injurious not
merely from its effect upon the COM
plexion, but because it destroys the
coating of the stomach and causes dys-
pepsia and kindred evils.
Professor Long, of Chicago, is au-
thority for the statement that if to fifty
million parts of water there is one part
of ammonia the water is dangerous
St Paul Globe.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30
Fair Exchange.

"Grindstone, what's the matter?"
Scrip, Kiljordan. Just getting ever
It,"
"What did you give up to it for' It's
all imagination. A fellow with any
strength of mind won't take the grip,
and it's bad thing to have. 1t always
attacks a fellow where he is weakest"
"You haven't had it,"
mo. Nothing the matter with me
but cold in the head"
Gum, Are you sure the grip always
attacks a man in his weakest part?'
"That's what the doctors all say"
"Then it isn't coldin the head you've
got, Kiljordan. It's the grip."-ChicagC
Tribune.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30
The Fetish Man at Home.

Established in reputation, the efforts
OF the fetish man are next directed
toward the requirement of a demeanor
calculated to impress his clients with q
sense of awe; he aims at assuming an
appearance at once grave and mysteri-
Gus; he seldom speaks unless profes
sionally, and then always in a gruff,
husky tone. He cultivates a meditas
tive look, and seems as if he were the
victim of great mental anxiety. Al
home he keeps himself very select, and
couples his time principally among bis
charms. There is generally some sign
OF his calling just outside his hut, tax
ing the form, as rule, of an earther
vessel, out of the neck of which sprout
long feathers--the pot being colored
with red, white and yellow chalk, and
the orangelike tint derived from chewed
betel nut, the expectoration of which
substance is supposed to have a very
pacifying influence upon the spiritua
evlldOer
Sometimes the fetish mans gesticula
tons will be directed to carved image
or some exaggerated form of charm
Suspended from the rafters in the in
terror of his hut are little parcels o
mystic character, smoked grimy by thu
constant fires these people maintain il
their dwellings And outside, over tn,
door, the same mysterious character o
ornamentation proclaims to all the oc
cupant's pretensions to sorcery. e. ]
Glave in Century.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30
Sunk by n TOrDedO,
By Associated Press to The Comet.

By Associated Press to The Comet.
IQUIQUE, CHILL April 25,- Via Gal
weston. The warship Blanco Enca'
lada, one of the vessels taken posses
sion of by rebels at the breaking out
Of the instruction, was sunk April Il
in Caldera bay by torpedo fred by
the new gunboat Almirante Lynch
Two hundred persons, comprising
half OF her crew, were killed. The
Congress party are now in possession
OF Caladera and Carrizal.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30

FLEMINeBURG, Ky, April 25.-Yes
terday, near Plummer's Landing, thiI
county, Joseph McVey was burning
brush on his farm, and while very
warm drank large quantity of water
which produced something like chol
ra infantum, and he was corpse TIVE
hours after
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30
Instrumentation.

Miss Keene-You should see Mr., Tilt
nez. He has the most expressive feat
ures, lovely eyes, but then he has the
dreadfullest pug
Miss Fadde (who worships dogs)--
Bring him TO see me this very evening,
and do tell him to bring his pug with
hint
Miss X. (dryly)-I think he will. Twas
abiding to his nose, my child,-Pitts.
burg Bulletin.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30
You Are In a Bad Elk.

But we will cure you fyou will pay
us. Our message is to the weak, ner.
vous and debilitated, who, by early
evil habits, or later indiscret:ons, have
trihed away their vigor OF body, mind
and manhood, and who suffer all those
effects which lead to premature decay
consumption or insanity. If this
means you, send for and read oul
Book OF LIFE, written by the greatest
SPECIALIST of the day, and sent (sealed,
for 6 cents in stamps. Address DR.
Parker's Medical and Surgical Insti
tute, 151 North Spruce St., Nashville
Tenn.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30
A Kind Erlend.

Is what they call that Famous Remedy; Red
Flag Oil, it quickly cures Rheumatism, Neu-
ralgiO, u Is, Bruises, Burns, Sores, and all pain
II is good for man or beast.
No other medicine has won for itself such
confidence as Dr. Lees Liver Regular. 1t the
bert combination for the cure of all Kieney and
Liver Complaints. Trial bottles free at McFar-
land & Cos Drug Store
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30

His Discovery,
~Let us HE TO the Wildwood" said she, and
they hied.
avis so quiet and peaceful" she said, and she
sighed;
And he wondered and wondered, and, wonder
ing, smiled
To think how quiet retreat could DO "wild.n
But when from the roots Of the bog nestled
oaks
There issued q million batrachian croaks,
And the jays and the crows in the naples o'eI
head
A wierdly cacophonous overture shed,
And q woodpecker whanged on hollow old
trunk,
While the squirrels they chartered as IL they
were drunk.
And insect on insect unloosened It's chin
To chink in the cracks Of the maddening din,
He wondered no longer, and this time h
smiled
Athaving discovered what made the wood wild
Boston Courier.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30

First Student lat classical school IL
say, George, what a wonderful race
those old Greeks were. Think Of their
triumphs in art, architecture, philos-
ophy, literature
Second-Huhl Nothing remarkable
about that. They didn't have to spend
the best years of their lives learning
Greek. Good News.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30

SIDNEY, O., April PA one year
old daughter of Henry Wolf drank an
ounce OF benzine this afternoon, and
will probably die. The infant is ter
ribly burned internally, although the
emetics administered acted promptly
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30

Hicks-How surprised Lot must have
been when he found his wife was salt.
Nupec-No more than l was when
found mine was pepper <yzSH
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30
An Anal.sis.

Mrs. Manly-Very few faces look best
in repose.
Mr.. Curry-True-so many people
sleep with their mouths open.-Kate
Fields Washington.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30
!. ProtAct Your Health. !

Cold and moisture combined have a torpof-
Using effect upon the bodily organs, and the
more tardily performed In winter than in the
fall. The same Is true, also. of the excret0ry
functions. The bowels are often sluggish, and
the pores OF the skin throw of but little waste
matter at this season. The system, therefore,
and regulating, and the SAFEST gdrest and
most thorough tonic and Alternative that can
be used for these purposes is Hostetter's
Stomach Bitters. Persons who wish to escape
the painful Disturbance Of the bowels. the
bilious attacks, and the nervous visitations,
so common at this time of the year, will do
well to reinforce their systems with this re-
nowned vegetable stomachic and invigorant.
stomach cheers the spirits and renoyates the
whole physique.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30

Chent--I want to sue man who
owes me fifty dollars.
Lawyer-What's your businessl
Client-I am parlor elocutionist and
Shakespearean reciter.
Lawyer-No use. The iury'd give q
verdict against you without leaving
their eats.-Puck.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30
JOHN F. DILLON

John F, Dillon, chief of counsel for
Jay Gould in all his important railroad
operations, counsel for the Western
Union ard other great New York cor
porations, holds very high rank among
New York lawyers, though he is not
very well known to the general public.
He has been but few years in the me-
tropolis, having been induced to locate
there by the offer of lecturer in the Co
lumbia Law school at $40, 900 year. Be-
fore this he was circuit Judge in the
west. He still lectures at Columbia.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1891-04-30

One Of the handsomest women in
Washington during the last session was
Mrs Joseph NJ, Carey, wife of Senator
Carey, of Wyoming, Aside from her
social accomplishments, which are many,
Mrs. Carey is well posted on all public
questions.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-03-06
4 Common Freak.

Then ?. 7. Barnum was in the museum
business in New York one OF his most
Jovia1 friends was Gaylord Clark, famous
htterateur in the days OF our fathers They
were a we'll matched pair of practical jok,
erS. One day when Mr.. Clark dropped in
at the museum, as was his custom, Mr.
Barnum, apparently much excited, hurried
his friend into the private Office and said:
Gaylord, | was about TO send for you |
want your advice. have a chance to pur-
chase the most wonderful of all geological
freaks. It's at first perfect fish, then it
changes TO four legged land animal, then
II climbs trees andn-
Bah, you're joking" interjected Mr..
Clark.
ION my honor, I am not impressive
ly replied the Snowman; but the ex-
pense."
'Oh, hang the expense" interrupted
Mr.. Clark. brimful Of enthusiasm over the
business project of his friend; IF you can
get any such freak as that your fortunes
made. But what's the thing calledy"
Well, F" replied Mr.. Barnum. with lust
the taintest suggestion of twinkle IN his
left eye, 1T belongs to the batrachian fam
lily of animals, and in the vernacalar is
called tLe-the--taGpole'S
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-03-06
Made the Colored Waiter Turn Pale.

My wife and were taking dinner at
the Wyoming Valley hotel, and a great big
strapping darkey was waiting on Us. /
was in a hurry, and told him l wanted
dinner as soon as possible. So ne hustled
about for my order of fish. and soon
brought il 10 me. | caused the fish TO dis
appear, plate and all, before his eyes and
then SAID, L thought / told you 10 bring
me some fish in a hurry The darkey in
sisted that he had brought it, but as it
could not De found he was finally brought
to believe that he had not By this time
the attention OF the whole room was drawn.
so ils soon as the darkey would bring me
anything caused it TO vanish, until tina,
poor old darkey was nearly wild Finally
asked for cup Of coffee. and he had
scarcely set 1t before me when looked at
II and said, Why, asked you for coffee
ms Is tea-' That was the last straw. and
the OLD darkey. with eyes almost starting
out from his head. staggered I'D TO the
hesd waiter, and throwing up his arms
cried out, Fob de Lord sake. femme &C
home; dat man Is de debii' Inagins tbs
roar that went up in that dining room "
Aaglcian Keller IN Hazleton Sentinel
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-03-06
Settled In Advance.

An old lawyer who occupies an Office on
Griswoid street found new tenant along
side OF him the other day-s stranger who
had come 70 Detroit as an agent. The law
yer entered, introduced himself learned
that the tenant had leased for year, and
then said:
I'VE shall see considerable OF each other.
being so close together, and should like
an understanding in advance II 8 biz
collector comes up and asks for you what
shall sayt'
None will come, as shall pay cash for
all get"
Good That Is also my way. VIII ron
want 70 borrow any money"
NO. sir"
Nor I. either Want any one TO back .
note for yoQ'"
NO, sir
Splendid Liable to ask ne 70 sign a
bonds
No, sir
Beautiful! Ever se: drunk"
mo, sir
Magnificent One E1cre question: You
don't want me 10 answer your telephone
NO. sir"
Shake, We shall be the best Of friends,
and hope you VIII stay for Eve years -
Detroit Free Press
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-03-06
'gle
A HTLAND WINTER.

How frowns the sun god on the northiand dark,
and turns away the brightness OF his fare
From hln and shore ard sea drea:y space,
And stills The gladstone singing Of the lars.
Now lies the northIand all snow sheeted, stark
And steel cold skies are ever stepped in night
Save where the moon elves dance in silver light,
And cleaning stars the rapt eyes limit mark.
Hence comes il that the fiery northiand heart
Is touched with sorrow, and the tale Of doom,
And sings the winters deep encircling gloom,
In living words, whence soul fires glowing, dart;
That mighty thoughts like wild auroras sweep
And fling their splaadors DER tne northern deep
j. J. Ealdane Burgess in Chambers Journal.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-03-06
REAL ESTATE AGENTS.

III sEssxES2Hcs::.Is::s: -: -:
80 80 :. - - 5ET. q
TIE WIoU7A 1AaLE
W1cnA RA0AA
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-03-06

CAicaTQ. Rock Island & Pacific RV

1nciuG.na LINES Eas. ana West of The Missouri
River The Object Route 20 aDe from CHICAGO.
ROCK ISLAND. pAvENPoHr, DIS MorHEs,
FALLS. MINNEAPOLIS, 81. PAUL. N. JOS
KPH, ATCHrsoN, LEAvxNwoRrH. KAEsAa
CITY, ToPxKA. DxNvxn. COLORADO sYNos
and PUEBLO. Free Reclining Chair Cars 20 and
ffoa CHICAGO, CALDWELL. HuTcHrNpoN
and DODGE CITY, and psIsos Sleeping Cas- BE-
tween CHICAGO WICHITA and uUTcHrNscu.
Daily Trains 20 and frem X1NoyIsAkh In ~
Terx4tory.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-03-06
LIES LARGEss.

In every heart SOME seed OK goodness grov4
In every path some bud Of beauty springs
In every SKY some rainbow color giows,
In every hedge some woodland warbler sngzss
And ne who in ife's iargess hath no part
Hides deep an iyied ruin in his heart.
-Mrx II. A. B Kelly in Frank Leshe's Weekly.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-03-06
SOLID yEsrBUlE EXPRESS TRAINS

$UklD bk3IlbVlE kxPdEyS IAAIux
q rsro.sh ceeshss slssgs.s srS pisins Co.
GIL BLUYYD and oMAHA, ard Prss ~ 1EtnS
Chat. Cars e~rwess CHIcA0o and pk1v11
CoLoIApo eYKTuo0 aad rvx1Lot via - ysor
eph. Ksssss City sod TopskA 1scusstoas
1afly with Cbesce Of Routes 20 80 6oB -
Lsks, Portland. tos Angssss s11 o~n vrsaoeeonL
The Direct Lins szd rom YikSs rsak- nAnAk
tou. osrdss Of the oc4s ne oanlsassrRa. -
ooszts orazd~ars 81 ColSra1o.
Via The Albert Lea Reute.
soisd Express Trans daily essvess caisess SO
k1nssap1lIs as1 D. Peal. Win TH1oooH -
Ginning Chair Cars cyn1Ml 70 anA nsn sscss
points ane Kansas c7sv. Thx5oge chasy Car go
Sleeper between Ysxfa. Spirit Lshs ss4 eSees
yslis Via Rock laiAaA Ths rsvvrfts L.s y
wsseysevn- e.eu 1sSs. - ozEmag 2seoyts -
Hu1naS go Yfsktag 0svznas 81 As ues<svssA
The ssors Line via Seneca ssd xsshAhss sesrs
fsciitssss 20 xsvsi 70 sna fsn xseaasASsAas. ca
ciznsa sd eshss oosth<rs rsfsts
YsY TcAaa. Msss. Ysstsrs, 90 ass1rs1 snesyBS
tea sv1fy ~ ssy Coyssa TsShss cNes. 90 sA1rsss
G. 8r. JoNM. JOHN eEoAeTtAk
O~sI NasA<ss oss1 Txs . Yssa As-
CHICAGO. ILL
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-03-06

The Dl-le q B&&Fa pFsded hiuseIf
on opposing al local tnps~ene.ts ir
London He vas . bitter foe Of that
progress which the metropolis now con-
a1ers necessary TO her Mlvssiou. aad he
.sasnt every attempt 70 open nes streets
through his r-aasxtx.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-03-06

Say, arnty, do get . move on you- Run
Nike the horses DO"
"Oh, ne. Frankie; IL voaldn't look well
for me to rua like that"
Then you might rs well take me home
again This pace is isst killing me "-Life
Always Ahead.
"Wen, there's oDe cooso1AtSon.' he SD
70 the ioemsa - they we're discussing The
weather. ice must b cheaper next sum
mG"
well. perhaps"
But there's no perhaps about H. The<e's
Foss Of II all ov0 The north this winter
You fellows VII have 70 come down"
"Yes, surPoss shs pr,oe VIII Be- some
what lower. bus there's the Offset, you
know
What oEsssg'
Why, tie soltdity h only 20 PEI cent Of
lSa year. and IL ~tll mai, twice - fast -
New Yoyt Sun
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-03-06
The Coming Method,

The Coming Method.
Hopeless Lover-That's your final an
Ever is it, Marie2
Unresponsive Maiden-It is, Harold. I
cannot be your wife.
''Then there is nothing left for me brt
death" (At a restaurant half an hour af-
forward to waiter(-Bring me a few oys-
ters.-Chicago Tribune
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-03-06

The Office Boy.
Editor Ito Office boy)--How do you spell
''tautologyi"
Office Boy {promptly)-I don't spell il at
all
Editor (angrily)-What did you go to
school for?
Office Boy tsadly)-Because I had to-
Washington Star.
The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1891-03-05

Trivvet-I understand that young Gongoslin
isn't received in the New York -Four Hundred
any more.
Dicer-Whaps the tronble?
Trivvet-The unfortunate fellow was caught
using grammatical expression and Ward Nc
All ster placed him under the ban.-Chicago Inter
Ocean.