davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Helena independent. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1875-1943, 1891-05-17

MARsHAL's ~sALE-NOTICE IS HEREBY
Nl given that on Tuesday. the 18th day Of May,
1891. / will sell at public sale of impounded stock
at Ziegler's stable on Wall street, Helena, one
sorrel horse with four white feet and spot in fore
head.
~ WIN. SIMS.
Marshal.
The Helena independent. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1875-1943, 1891-05-17
@. X. T.-Honest Results.-O. X. r.

Sprinkling pots for garden us every cheap at
The bee Hive.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1891-12-31

IL the vast Sierre wilderness far to
the southwark Of the famous Yosemite
Valley. there IS a yet gran'ier valley OF
the same kind II is situated on the
Sou Ii Fork of Kin = River, above the
most extensive groves AMI forests OF
the giaut seGuoii. and beneath the
shadows of the mountains in the range
where the canouS are deepest and
the snow-lsien peaks are crowded
most closely tnrpther. Ii IS called the
Big kjny's River Canon. or Kings
Yosemite. AMI is reached by way of
VisaIia the nearest point on the
distance is about forty-liye miles, or
by the kearsarge Pass from the east
side of the range 1t is about ten
mics long. half ii mile wide, and the
stunendous rocks of pnfplish gray
granite that form the walls arc from
2 800 TO ). .O0J feet in height. while the
depth Of The valley below tue genera!
surflce of the mountain mass from
which ii has been carved Is cOnsldera-
bly, more than IA mile. Thus it ap-
pears that this new Yosemite is longer
and deeper aud lies embedded n
arander mountains. than the we'll
known Yosemite OF the Merced. Their
general characters. however. are Won
derfully alike. and they bear the same
relationship 10 the fountains of the
ancient glaciers above them.-Joian
Muir, Ia tie Century.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1891-12-31
An independent Postmaster.

A story recently published in the In
dependent recalls to prominent min
ing man an incident in the early days
of Pony, which. by the way, is an old
camp. At the time referred to the
town had about forty people. OF
course they needed II postoflice. though
no one could be found willing to take
the responsibility. There was no
money in il and the Office would he a
decided nuisance TO the Postmaster.
However. a saloonkerpcr who was
more public-spirited than his fellow
citizens took the office. The Office con-
sisted of an old tea-box. in which all
the mail was dumped. The citizen
would sort over the lot and take what
belonged to him.
One day gentleman came along
and after glancing at the system turn
ed TO the Postmaster.
Don't you know that it is illegal to
allow people to pick out their own
mail like that?" he said.
well stranger, | don't know as it
is any of your business how this office
is run.n replied the Postmaster.
But I AM !, Uaited States Post
office Inspector"
well, in that case" said the Post
master, I'VE will finish up this post
office in Pony right now" And lie
took the tea box and placed it in the
middle of the road and, with a good
run, came down aud kicked it clear
across the guich.
There" he said to the officer, "now
you 60 back to Washington and tell
the administration that the accounts
are closed up and the Postmaster of
Pony has resigned. .n-HeLeHa Iade-
ne313euT
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1891-12-31
drowned WeStcrnerS.

The people of the west are darker
than those of the east 1t is easy to
see that. They live more in the open
air. They are Drowned by the sun
and rougr cned hy the winds of the
prarics. This is ~ true of the women
as Of t e men. West of the Missis-
>ippi YOU see very few fat men. Even
middie-wci.ht men are rare. The
RUE is. tall. dark. dark-haired. brown
or black beard tbi.. What is it that
makes so many men of the prairie
west sioot up more than six feet in the
air and vet keep their weight down to
100 or 165 pounds | could not discern.
But any one VI ho travels much in that
region must have noticed The rem ark
able stature OF the men rs n whole.
OF course the average of humanity in
the west is more uncoulh tilan in the
east In the hotels and the dining
cars YOU see more men. and women,
too. eating with their knives or with
napkins tucked under their chins.
West Of Chicago You will hear three
times as many persons sucking soup
out of their spoons as east of that
point. B It in kiudliness. true. sincere
politcuesS. absence of aifectatiOn and
primgishneSS, The weStcrners beat us
every time. If YOU 20 out from the
east and think 10 take ihcEl up for
hayseed> ur pumpkins you will make Il
sad mistake. Cor. -AagaSt Chronicle.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1891-12-31
THE STORY OF A DIAMOND.

One OF the largest and finest gems
in the world is the Orloff diamond,
which is among the crown jewels of
the Russian emperor. 1t IS stone
with strange history, too.
When first discovered by Europeans,
it formed the eye Of an idol in a,
temple near Trichinopoli. in India.
Then it was stolen by Frenchman,
VINO escaped with his prize to Persia,
and who, fearful of beng discovered,
was glad to dispose OF his lll-gotten
gear for a sum of about $4,000.
The man who bought the stone, a
Jewish merchant, sold it to one Sha-
fras an astute American, for $4,000.
Shafras had conceived the idea that
by carrying the stone to Russia he
would obtain from the Empress Cath
arine the Great a princely sum for it.
How to travel in safety with the
stone, the theft of which had of course
been discovered and proclaimed, be-
! came grave consideration. 1t was
too large to swallow, and no mode OF
concealment presented itself to Sha-
fras that seemed secure from dlscov
cry.
The way in which he solved the
problem was remarkable. He made a
deep incision in the teshy part of his
left leg, In which he inserted the stone.
closing the wound carefully by sew
ing it up with silver thread. When
the wound healed the Armedian mer-
chant set out on his travels quite bold
ly. and, although more than once ap-
pretended vigorously searched, and
| even tortured little, he was obdu
rate, and firmly denied having the
lstone IN his possession.
Having at length reached his destl-
nation he asked from the empress the
sum OF 100000 for the gem. an
| amount wich Catharine was unable TO
raise a the moment.
We next find the Armedian at Am
sterdam with the intention Of having
his diamond cut. Here the stone was
seen by Count Orloff, who determined
! TO purchase it for presentation to bis
| royal mistress, the Empress Catharine.
The sum ultimately paid for the IA
nous gem was about $3.50, 900 in cash.
| together with an annuity of $500
and patent of nobility. Shafras
tiourised exceedingly and died mil
IlOnaire.
Such, in brief, is the story of the
Qrlotf diamond.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1891-12-31
Celebrities in Yellowstone Park.

There's Chauncey Depew. he's a
purity good one. but he wants to do
all the talking himself, an you to do
all the laiiin'." jay Gould. he's a
a mysterious sort of IL cuss. He don't
want to say nothin'. Some of us fellers
took him for a detective. but some of
the others allowed as he was an East
ern Bank President disguised. 'Taint
been long since | took Gen. Schotield
and his bride through the park, but
on wcddin' couples.
I'VE ketca Il lot O. sky pilots. too, in
the park. | had Talmagc wonce. That
fellow must II been in the front o the
line when they were givin' out mouths.
But still he behaved hisself. and amt
agoin to say anything against him.
But us frilers had the mostest fun
hen Washington cove named Hall
went through the park. That was
about three Years ago, when the Bee
hive geyser Just broke loose. and ev-
erybody was hot fer seein the Bee
hive WALL, Us drivers had heered
tell us how this Hall was puverful
smart ut sermonizin', so we all
piles up ter the chapel. | amt much
of Judge, but | think it was
about rs ordinary picece O.
preaclin' as ever | heerd. Never
Geerd Il shout from the amen benches,
an nota Il soul got religion, an | don't
think much Of IL parson as can't stir
up more excitement than that. So my
pal. Geyser Bob. he was there. an
sail he: i bet know feller as can
empty that whole room quicker than
coyuIe can kick All right. sez Land
knowcd there was goin' to ter be
some fun, but | was bit afraid that
Bob was Il goin' TO shoot. But he
didn't. He just yelIs in the door.
The Beehive is spoutin'r an inside of
ten seconds there wasn't but six people
ia tue house besides the preacher, an
i,e SEE quick as a wink. fer think he
wanted ter git out himself: Brethren.
think we better adjourn the meeting
ter see the Beehive. "-Phu idetphtd
~ card
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1891-12-31

Eick's Monthly Magazine: What
the country needs Lore than anything
else. just once q year, Is Mlsht
Christmas Present exchange.
An enterprising gentlemen has al
ready started an establishment where
one can dispose Of duplicate wedding
presents, bat a person gets married
once only in his life, while he or she,
as the case or Sex may be, endures
many ChristIna5es.
How sweet and pleasant woCld 1t
clergyman who has been remembered
by seventeen or two dozen OF the eve
lambs OF his congregation with pair
OF slippers from each. could trade OF
most of them for, say, q meerschaum
pipe OF some perpendicular linen col
lars.
Until such an exchange begins to
fill longfelt want, the daily papers
could help Oh the good work by per
mitting their patrons TO insert free
such advertisements as the following
at holiday time:
"A boy OF II wishes TO exchange a
new copy OF 'Josephus,' handsomely
bound. for a second hand copy of
| 'BeelsebubDich, the Terror OF Cory
Gulch.' or 'Deadhead Dan, the Young
Detective OF Mulberry Avenue"
Young tady would part with seven
q Christmas cards -four OF them
hand painted} in return for a dlmond
engagement ring"
Married man desires to exchange
i pan Of ice-cream colorel wristers
for Z glass OF beer
Young clergyman viii dispose OF
an assortment Of slippers, some of
which are embroidered with blue dogs
with scarlet eyes. for 4 serviceable
pair Of winter gloTes, fTincd pre-
feGred. Must be mates"
Boston young lady, temporarily
residing in New York, would like to
exchange eight copies OF BroWniag's
complete works, all new and unused,
for Il pair OF goldrimm spectacles
No 5. near sighted
Young married man viii trade d
box Of cigars Handsome work of art
on inside Of lid) for 4 io-cent plug OF
chewing tobacco
'Genleman desires 10 part with g
| pair of large red nittena. VIII ac-
cept a two ply ham sandwich, or three
Frankfurter sausages IN exchange
Youth viii give a cooy Of Lambs
Poems Of Chiidhood tIeayes uncut
for a base ball lat or a cheap pisto
with box of cartridgas''
a musically inclined girl VIII ex
change her brothers irresponsible Cor
ner Tor an upright piano
Il young gentleman of II. in Ions
pantaioons, viii give & fancy cap, la
bled For a Good Boy for Il ticket t
any accessible dime museum
Young lady of II wishes TO ex
change a wax doll, with real hair. TO
copy OF the Quick or the Dead ;ils'
a rubber cry doll for % cents worti
of chewing gun, yaniij;; or trawbeI1y.
The father of 1-year old bo,
,, wishes to dispose Of new brass drum
warranted sound (too sound, in fact.
No reasonable offer refused"
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1891-12-31
"The Way We do in America"

The gentleman who tells this story
is Il preacher. and as he got it conf
,lentialiy from Il man who was there
names are suppressed:
1t was in Paris. The scene was at
a private banquet. Distinguished men
from several countries were present.
The necks OF Il quantity of bottles had
been broken. 1t is the custom in
Paris, SO nv friend informed me, for
the man who responds to a toast to
break his glass in so doing so that the
toast can never again be drunk out Of
the goblet. The fragments are thrown
into the punch bowl. The hour was
getting late. An American editor,
hose name is well-knowu all over his
own country. was responding TO the
last toast of The evening. In closing
lie not only broke his goblet. hut
smashed the punch bowl and all the
glassware on The table. aud then broke
n, Ii e mirrors. As he completed his
work of destruction ne mounted the
table. AMI said in Il loud voice. That 5
the WAY We do in America. W Chicago
TribuIc.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1891-12-31
THE DEVIL AND THE FARMER.

There was a conference in the
neither regions which were brilliantly
Illuminated by a thousand eternal
fires and resonant with the cracking
of unlimited quantities of rhinestone
His satanic majesty sat upon throne
Of glowing Goals and gazed upon his
minions with delight. Around him
sat his faithful imps, Beelzebub,
Mephisto, Moloch and a dozen other
well-known characters. 1t was q not
able gathering.
How fares it up on earth y asked
his majesty, after ordering the chief
fireman to throw on an extra shOveful
Of coal
Mephisto shrugged his shoulders
and answered in that deep bass voice
which We admire SO much in Gomod's
opera: "As usual, your highness.
Mankind IS coming to Us fast. Every
body seems contented except the
American farmer"
What's the matter with him.
asked Satan
''Kicking as usual Grumbling and
dissatisfied at everything"
Satan chutkled ..What are the
latest symptoms?" he asked
''Oh. he IS dissatisfied with his
crops; Is swearing about his mort
cages, and is trying his hand at
politics, about which he understands
as much as We do OF ice making"
Nonsense" replied Beelzebub,
who had hitherto been a silent listener.
All he wants is big crop, an un-
no1'tgaged farm, free transportation
for his grain, cheap money, a control
ing interest in the country and the
election OF Jerry Simpson to be
thoroughly happy"
Cried Mephisto cynicaiiy: III bet
that if you gave him all this he would
be as dscontented as before
III take you" cried Beelzebub
who prided himself upon his know
ledge Of human nature.
The bet was duly recorded with ;
sharp stalactite upon Il tablet of sui
phur, and Beelzebub. armed with the
authority Of Satan, ascended to eartl
to try his hand at philanthropy.
1t was in the month OF April. Some
where in the interior II Illinois al
aged and grizzled tiller of the sol
stood with his hand on the plow urg
ing on a pair OF refractory mules. On'
of them had just kicked clear Of tn
traces.
w Whoa, there. Nebuchadnezzar" b
shouted. "Goldarn this team. | wisl
the devil had hold of you this minute.
What a remarkable WISH" said
stranger who suddenly stood besid
the astonished farmer. and VIII
smelled decidedly Ike sulphur
What's the trouble?r
Trouble" answered the farne1
wiping his perspiring brow on til
back of his hand. and thereby leayin
a streak OF Illinois soil upon his fore
head where the perspiration ha
erstwhile stood. .Trouble2 Lock a
this blankety- blank field. There is
rock or stump to every square inc
of surface I've broken one ploN
share in trying 10 cut through it. an
now my mules are going on strike.
Give me the plow," said Beelzebul
''Git up there, Nebuchadnezzar; CLAN
jeremiah
Il was astonishing with what spec
the plow furrowed through the Ian;
In the hands of the sulphurous strans
er it seemed to fly along in spite ,
sn4gs and distractions In thrt
minutes and Isl seconds by the fa
mer's stop-watch the immense fel
was thoroughly plowed 1t fairl
took away the granger's breath
Are you satisfied now?" aske
!, Bealzebub '.We1l. yes. kinde
:. You're purity quick at plowin
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1891-12-31
That Stair Carpet

Few people know how to lay stair
carpet correctly. The average man or
woman begins at the top landing. some
even start at the bottom, aud ill each
step with enough tacks to hold the
house down. If the carpet happens TO
be little scant in length. they can't
stretch il. and the first time they move
they lind their carpet has been hatliy
injured by being overtaeked. Tney
then begin to runiinaic internally over
the entire disclosures and expensive
ness of stair rods. anyhow. says the
.4naerican Carpet and Upholstery Trade.
Ii the carpet is bougat OF generous
length and laid in the manner de-
scribei below. The iacks at the top
and bottom can be drawn as often us
desired. and the fabric moved few
inches up and down. so rs to COM
pletely equalize the wear.
The best aud only way to lay stair
is TO tack the carpet under the fabric
that covers the landing. begin at the
top and fit the carpet nicely in the
center of each step. securing il in
place by single half-driveu tack in
the upright board Then start again
at the top, putting on the Tou aud
fixtures al The same time. The securing
tack should 5e drawn and the carpet
properly stretched as eacl rod is
placed. liz this way straight stair
way can always be accurately aud
smoothly covered. The most popular
rod at present is the seven-eighlh or
inch plain brass. with invisible fasten-
ings.
For stairs where the carpet covers
the whole width of the step Il special
rod and fastening is made. This fasten-
ing is tackled right on the face of the
carpet, and the rod is dropped in a
little slot at the top.
There is nothing which makes a
hallway more attractive on entering it
than tier of bright brass or nicke ell
stair rods against a rieh dark carpet.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1891-12-31

But now comes the ALFRED hard work
of sowing. It'll take weak at least
to SOW this field and"
Nothing OF the kind cried Beel-
zehud. ''rIust watch me-
He took hold of the immense sacks
of seed that were lying III corner
and by a dexterous movement. such
as the magician Hermann uses to.
throw cards among his audience, he
spread the grain over the large fields
Before the astonishod farmer could
say John Fitz- Porter it was accom-
plished. The farm was beautifully
soWn.
Are you satisfied now?'' asked
Beelzebub.
"Satisfied?" The farmer sat down
on stump and look OF pain darted
over his sunburnt face ''Sat;stied?' -
he echoed. "Ah, if the grain was only
ripe. There viii be drouth when we
nead rain and rain when we need
drouth. Before June the whole crop
may be ruined
Beelzebub smiled grimly.
Here" he said, taking two i'm
III tilNS tfJ-Ais-. iiSl tl1tSNEtl id~LiIcEl. oit
| OF his coat tails, ''in this case you will
find concentrated sunshine IN s5or-
age battery Of my own construction,
| and in this one Of Gen Dyrenforth'5
celebrated ram making balloons You
are free to use either OF them as nee
essity may demand. F"rewell l VII
como again in June
Two months passed before the
courteous and obliging Beolzebub put
IN another appearance. The earth
was rich with golden harvest and corn
was growing beautifully Never had
there been such Il crop prospect
"Well, Mr.. Farmer" said Beelzebub,
slaping his friend ca the back till his
store teeth threatened to become dis
lodged, ARE you satisfied now?'
4 cloud OF SORROW overspread tEe
granger's expressive face. It looked
as though he were about to weep.
''Satistied2 Great gosh, no, Look at
that tield OF cora. They say it Will be
the biggest crop over known, and the
price of hogs only 50 head What's
to become Of lis poor farmors?'
My friend said Beelzebub, visibly
| moved, don't weep, Hogs are going
up. Here IS private telegram just
received stating that Germany is about
to remove the restrictions from Amer
lean pork. Prices will double Then
again look at your wheat. It's simply
/ glorious
The farmer shook his head dismally
II don't go much on the wheat" he
replied If | alone had big crop !
would be happy bat my neighbors
have as large yield as [ and prices
will so down to nothing"
But my friend" answered the
commiserating Beelzebub, 'your whea;
IS of a different varity from theirs. See
, here and be took handful of the
ripe grain and rubbed it gently be
tween his thumb and fingers. Lo
it turned cat to be pure gold!
The whole field he said, rs shin
/ ing gold like this sample and vii
| average $1,000 an acre Are yoy
satisfied now?''
For moment smile of JOY spread
over the farmers weather beateI
features. but only for a moment. TheI
! came look CT such object misery tina
Beelzebub dropped an involuntar.
| tear.
'.Satisfed?' he asked. '.Hol,
Jumbo. no, Its the worst thing tha
t could have happened to me. Why
2 only yesterday | advocated cheal
: paper money at 4 meeting Of the far
I mers' alliance Gold will beat at
Y discount"
But" replied Reelzebub. impatient
/ ly, gold is gold and always WORT
:. something"
:. The granger hid his face in hi
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1891-12-31
TERMS, TWO DOLLARS PER YEAR.
G. a. FORREST.
q. q. 5LDIa 10

A TTOKNE.S AND COUNSEL .pR5 At LAW
n Office owe. First Nali asai iilnk, Eighth
Street. G lllcctions promptly attended 10.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1891-12-31

hands. ssNo." he sighed; I am a
ruined man. By the time | have been
robbed of portion Of it by my neigh
bors, cheated of part of it by the
mint and paid off my mortgages with
the balance shall have nothing left. !"
Beelzebub vanished suddenly,
leaving behind him only a cloud of
vapor and a Fourth of-July smell.
That night the e was another con
ference.
You are right" said Beelzebub,
sa lily. The devil himself can't sat
isfy an American farmer"
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1891-12-31
She Was Jealous.


A thin. wiry-lookiug little woman
with black eyes and Il coldlv severe
look about The lips was walking up
one of Deiroit's principal streets by
the side uf II round-faced. beardless
and perfectly innocent and harmless
looking short aud very fat old man,
clad in Hopping linen duster and
suit of blue jeans. says the Detroit
Free IrcsS. They stopped at fruit
stand and the old man bought tHo
bananas of The rosy-cheeked Italian
girl in attendance. Then the coupe
moved on. aud when they had gone
about len feet the woman hisSed on
bitterly:
AT your old tricks, Medad Iig-
gin,!
What do you mean. Marier9" he
asked. wonderingly.
'Aw, YES. what do | meanP' sac
sneercd. in tones so cold that all the
thermometers in that -SS,s'l dropped
three degrees. So{Gc 4olks can be
mighty innocent even when they are
caught. As though | didn't see you
flirting with that sassy fruit-stand
girlr'
'Gosh-a-mighty. Marier!'
law. would tremblc if | were you.
You can look mighty innocent. can't
YOU, Medad Higgins? Amt you
asha-a-a-med of yourself? 1t jist
seems as If you cayn't 60 nigh girl
without flirting with her. I'd be
ash-a-a-a-mcd if | was YOU"
Great Scott Marier. what'd / say
or do?n he said. helpleSsly.
"Id have the face TO ask, Medad!
What bizness had YOU saying anything
to her? heard you say: Pleasant
saiay amt it?' and 'How's bizness to-
day?' and 'Good-by' in that flighty.
flirty way of yours. Sh-a-a-ame on
We! There's no tellin' how much fur
Their you'd have went if | hadn't been
along. La. Medad Higgins. if l done
my Guty Id bring this up at our next
church meetin' and have YOU church
mauled for such bizness. But I'll
spare you this Time on account of your
children and grandchildren, but an
other time III not spare you. and the
church and the world shall know how
weekpd YOU air.
And they walked on. Medad looking
as though he had been miraculously
saved from an awful and impending
shame.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1891-12-31
WOOD STOVES

stock this different kinds of
comprising everything from hecleapecook and heating Stoves
the Ranges in the unquestionaby the
arg in the city and prices low the lowest
will pay elsewhere BE look
the Pennsuar of 1884, they the best in the land and the
prices them somewhat lower than they used to be-
Have Just received fall stock of Axes Saws, Meat Cutters Sausage
Suffers and Hay Knives Storm SASH Remember that
never allow anybody to unlersell nue.
Respectfully,
EMIL TE1ITI I'm
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1891-12-31

A TTO3NEY AND COUNSELOR AT LAW.
N Ollie in f0rris1ns Brick Block Ejghtn
Street Manitowoc, Wisconsin.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1891-12-31

TRY Du!lam's German Liniment for
Headache. TooiAacile and Neuralgia
cures in miuatts for % cts. at Z. c.
Buerstut.e. 27aug92