The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-01-22
A BACHELORS STORY.

contented and happy. am still a
bachelor, contented but not happy.
This is the difference between Thomas
Growler of month ago and the same
person today. But one short month ago
/ thought nothing of matrimony. l
smoked my pipe in comfort at my lodg-
ings On the city Of Canterbury or sewed
refractory buttons upon my clothing
without thought Of any female to take
that employment out of my hands.
But l was one day seated in the beauti-
full grounds Of the Dane John, watching
the children drinking at the fountain,
when a shadow fell upon the path. 1t
might have been the shadow of coming
events, but upon looking around l per
ceived that the substance was a very
beautiful young lady, with roguish blue
ewes that might have been the head
quarters Of fun and good humor, looking
at me from frame Of golden ringlets.
Now, you need not imagine that l,
sober gentleman of 40, was in love
with a girl. Nothing of the kind She
was at least 30, and ragged little boy
who stood near, whose tongue Iloosened
with a piece of silver, told me that she
was widow, who owned a small farm
outside the town, and that her name was
Mrs Faber. He also informed me that
her brother lived with her and managed
the property.
Upon the following morning / greatly
surprised my friend, Harry Powers, by
praising the Widow Faber, and request
ing an introduction. He gazed at me a
moment in SPECIFICS astonishment, and
think that he really thought of knock
ing me down with Webster's Dictionary
and calling for assistance. But Harry
was engaged himself and soon compre-
hended the state of affairs. So he
dropped the book upon the table and in
vited me to picnic which was to take
place in the woods in few days, where
| should meet the lady and be intro
duced.
Immediately purchased a new suit of
clothes, beautiful wig and a pair of
tight boots, and when the morning Of
the festival dawned crowded myself
into the broadcloth, put on my wig, and
after much preparation and strong Ian
guage had been wasted managed to
squeeze my feet into the patent feathers,
where they felt as if incased in red hot
iron boots.
At the picnic l received the promised
Introduction, and had the pleasure of es-
,orting Agnes all day. She talked with
me, and we attacked the eatables in
company, investigating the interior Of
pigeon pies and dissecting chickens to-
gether. was happy all day, and when
at parting she invited me TO visit her
believe the tightness Of my waistcoat
was all that prevented my heart from
bursting its bonds. Ny feet prevented
me from sleeping that night, but | was
willing to suffer in such cause, and
bore it without a murmur.
One day hired horse and gig at the
livery stable, and started toward the
farm TO carry Agnes to party at a
ueighboring town. She was already
dressed when / drove up, and looked
beautiful in a new bonnet and shawl
We were very comfortable, and our con-
versation was very interesting. | was
advancing rapidly in her good opinion.
and was beginning to think seriously Of
popping the question, when the horse
stopped suddenly as if turned to stone.
We both tumbled suddenly forward
with low bow, ard my companions
lovely nose came into sharp contact with
THE dashboard.
Immediately jumped out 70 see what
WAS the matter, bur everything about
the horse appeared to be al right. and
ad air climbed into the gig and prepared
ta start. But the horse obstinately re-
fused to move. / cOaxed aud hattered,
brt he would not be persuaded. |
tlhrashed him with the whip until my
Wrist ached. but he remained immova-
bic Us a statue. At last / sharpened a
hedge stake, took my seat, gave the
feins to my companion and gave him a
tremendous blow. hardly hoped to see
him stir, but he did, and started with a
leap that almost threw me on my back.
| Immediately seized the reins, but his
determination had taken another chan
mel, and he would not stop. i tugged at
the reins and shouted, "Whoa" but he
held the bit between his teeth and rushed
along the road like a runaway comet.
Agnes screamed and / roared as we
dashed by the farm houses with the
speed of alocomotive. The horses heels
splintered the dashboard at every leap,
and the bright shoes twinkled like small
stars in dangerous proximity TO our eyes.
Finally the wheels struck tree, the
horse stumbled and the next moment l
was lying upon my back in the road
Feeling like an exhausted bellows | re-
gained my breath and picked myself up
after while, but what situation! Agnes
lying upon the grass, with torn clothing
and disordered hair, while her chignon
was rolling along the pathway pursued
by terrier. The horse stood quite still
and gazed calmly upon the ruins. | was
without hat, covered with dust. The
BOYS shouted boisterously, and the com.
pany, who perceived that we were unin.
jured, laughed. | could have Jumped
into the river to hide myself, and en-
tertained serious ideas of running away,
but | thought better Of it and assisted
Agnes TO arise.
IL cost me a heavy sum for the wrecked
gig. was scratched and discouraged.
Agnes had turned the cold shoulder and