The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-03-14

Mark twain Tells nm Interesting stssy
Of Him.

Mark Twain was present 1t the
banquet OF the National Wholesale
Druggists Association nj It's recent
meeting IN Washington. and ia rsturL
for his dinner related tho following
story. given In the Pharmaceutical Fro:
About thousand years ago approx
imately. | was apprcnticcd rs print
er's devil to learn the trade. In COM
mon with three other boys OF about
my own age. There came TO the vii
lage long-lcggcd individual OF about
nineteen. from one OF the interior
counties; fish-cycd. no expression. aud
without the suggestion OF a smile
couldn't have smiled for salary. We
took him for fool. and thought We
would try To scare him TO death.
We went Ia the village druggist and
borrowed skeleton. Tho skeleton
didn't belong TO the druggist. but hc
had imported il for the village doctor.
because the doctor thought he would
send away for IL. having some delicacy
about using QLaughter.) The
price OF the skeleton nj that time was
$50. | don't know how high they 10
now. but probably higher on account
of the tariff. (Laughtcr.)
We borrowed tho skeleton about y
o'clock Mt night. and we got this man
Nicodcmus Dodge by name--we got
him down town out OF the way, aud
then we put the skeleton in bis bed.
He lived in n little onc-storicd log
cabin in the middle OF vacant lot.
We left him to get home by himself.
We enjoyed the result In the light OF
nnticipaiion; but by and By we began
10 drop into silence; the possible con-
sequences were proving upon us.
Suppose that IL frightcns him into
madness. overturns his reason and
sends him scrceching through the
strcetsl We shall spend sleeplcss
nights the rest of our DAYS. Everybody
WAS afraid. By and by IL was forced
10 the lips of one Of us that we had bet
ter GO az once and see what had hap
pcned. Loaded down with crime. we .
approached that hut aud pceped
legged crittcr was sitting on his bed
with u hunk OF gingerbread In his
hand. aud between the bites he played
"A tune on II icw's-harp. There has sat
perfectly happy. and all around him
on the bed were toys and jini-cracks
aud striped candy. The darned cuss.
he had gone and sold that skeleton for
s.. (Lnughter)
The druggists fifty-dollar skeleton
was gone. We wentin tears 10 the drug
gist and explained the matter. Wa
couldn't have raised $50 In $50 years.
We were getting board aud clothi1g
for the first year. clothing aud board
for the second year and both OF them
for the third year But the druggist
forgave ns on the spot. but he said hs
would like MS 10 let him have our
skeletons when we were done with
them. There couldn't be anything
fairer than that; We spouted our sksle-
tons and went away uncomfortable.
But from that time the druggists pros
perity ceased.
That was one of the most unfortun-
ate speculations he ever went into.
After some years one Of the boys went
and got drowned; that was one skelc-
ton gone. and tell YOU the druggist
felt pretty badly about II. A few years
after another OF the boys went up la
balloon. He was TO get - an hour for
IL. When he gets back they will bc
owing him 81, 900. 600. The druggist's
property was decreasing right along.
After few more years the third
boy tried an experiment to see II y
dynamite charge would 60. IL went.
all right They found some OF him.
perhaps vest-pocketful; still II was
enough to show that some more OF
that estate had gone. The druggist
WIS getting along in years. and he COM
menced 10 correspond with me. have
been the best correspondent he has
lie is the sweetest-natured man ever
saw; always mild aud polite. aud new
Ell wants TO hurry me at all.
/ get letter from him every now and
then and he never refers TO my form
as skeleton; he says. We'll. how Is !
IL getting along-is 1t Ia good repairF
got night-rate message from him
recently--said that he was getting old
and the property was depreciating Ia
value. and II | could let him have a
part Of IL now he would give time on
the balance. (Laughter), Think OF
the graceful way In which he does
everything generosity OF II, all.
You cannot find iiuer character than
that. 1t Is the gracious characteristic
Of all druggists. So. out OF my heart.
! wish you all prosperity and every
happiness"