The Helena independent. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1875-1943, 1891-08-30
II DEVIL TEMPTED.

NVts -" -
"Ho was a portly, gray-haired gentleman
Of benevolent aspect and kindly nature.
Ha wore a dress coat and gold eyeglasses.
and all that WAS red about him were the
ruby studs in his white shirt front.
Haven't you visited the earth latelyT" !
asked him.
mo; not since my election"
"Your election2" ! qneried. II thought
you had been thrown out Of tho upper circle
some millions Of years ago. and you have
been rsipning below ever since"
oh, no." he answered with . smile.
'.Ihe internal regions are now a republic.
We elect q president once a century"
"And Old Lucifer."
1--WE got tired of his despotism long ago.
He IL o shovelinR coal for the dynamo"
And are you the fallen angelo
yer before / died. The fallen angels are all
engaged in mental occupations nov. Man
kind got away with them. Oh, the place il
vastly altered now. We have manhood suf-
frage and primaries and municipal cleo
tons. TIL fact Ia the methods of the world
are so far superior to those that used to OBJ
tain down there that we have adopted all
We could"
"You surprise me-"
BLESS your soul,' said the Devil. "you
wouldn't know the lower regions. Still,
the earth 10 4 little ahead Of US in many
points, and. indeed, partly why / accepted
ments l could introduce below"
Pardon me, but about tho fire and brim-
stone?"
''Thsre's no such thing, and as for hunt
ing SOULS, l think I'll put an advertisement
in the papers informing the public that We
have no agents travelling looking for them.
All such are sheer impostors. In the very
old days, when business was new. of cou rse
we had to employ drummers, but now we
are considering seriously the passing of q
restriction act and allowing no more immi-
grafton. The fact is that people now seem
to be eager to come to us. What with sol
ence and civilization and enterprise and the
struggle for life, the earth has become un-
b%earable. n the number of suicides IL
alarming us. You see, the fallen angel
dynasty was all right until some smart men
came there, md a socialistic movement
arose. Your ideas of US are all wrong. The
Internal regions are not At all like what
you think they are. We found some refined
process of punishment az the years went
on. The old idea was to roast people and
give them nothing to drink.
THAT waa expensive and troublesome.
We were exhausting coal, too, and we had
to do something. We used to make people
do all the disagreeable things they disliked
to do. Now, we force them to do all the
VnCy v W. AUAb q vCAy FVClC
punishment. For instance, if a man is
very fond of whisky, we don't give him
anything else, and he has to drink all the
time. BY the way. | wish you would send
us a real good political boss. We have got
the political machine quite smoothly yet.
There is an innate modesty in the human
nature that will not be roasted out, even.
We want a process of Kidding the soul OF
everything that is good. Every now and then
there ia a revolution in favor of virtue, and
sometimes it really looks as if it would sue
ceed."
BY THE time we had reached the lobby OF
the California theater, and Manager Gill
disposal. We walked In.
What is this play?" we asked.
1.-THE Twelve Temptations"
'Then a quartette of grotesque figures
executed the most quaint, eccentric Dance
"What are these things?"
"They are gnomes, spirits and COLLINS,
supposed to be supernatural beings"
"This is very, very funny" and the devil
laughed a loud, melodious kind of laugh.
"This is what they call a farce-comedy,
isn't it?'
mo, no; this is a tremendously serious
II must get a manusoript and have it pro;
of n burlesque. Thu dialogue is clever, not
bad at all; but what is this scene?'
1.-THE heart of the frigid zone"
'1his is original. We haven't ANYTHING
quite as handsome as this in the internal
regions, but we have an abundance of ice.
the accumulations OF centuries, and I am
thinking seriously of inaugurating q freez-
ing spell. l must copy this. II will make a
great hit with the elite of our society,""
"What are all these handsome ~creatures?'
"That is the ballet"
"How superb. I must instruct my secre-
tary to at once secure their names and ne.
gotlate for their appearance; they will turn
the heads of our exclusive 400"
He sat quietly now, as if in deep study,
watching carefully the movements of the
pretty girls n the bewilderinR changes of
scenery until the last act was reached and
the pantomime commenced, when he sud
denly broke out in a fit of laughter and
rolled over in the box.
"And what are they?' he asked when he
had sufficiently recovered.
"They are English pantomimists."
"Well, that is clever. We have not vet
reached such perfection in our dominion.
Is the man living who wrote the play?"
ooh, yes; Charles B. Yale, residence,
Philadelphia"
and should he come our way I'll see that he
is properly promoted"
We sat and watched the ballet of "The
Nations" the grand transformation scene,
and finally the curtain fell and we walked
down the street, and How is the drama
down there?" l asked.
ut is very fourishing. / am very much
satisfied. The French plays are just the
kind of things that suit our ideas, and then
Isben and Sudermann are immensely popu-
lar. We don't like the American plays.
They still seem to inculcate that virtue tri-
umphs. But the pieces have brought us a
great many desirable immigrants. l mean
people of culture and brains, who usually
go the other way. We have endowed a
theater for the Isben cult, and 'Hedda
GableI, is to be produced in great
style. 1t will be a state event with us.
or course in some of his pieces we cut
out the yirtuous scenes. They are apt to
is a great and growing agent with us. We
the vicious uneducated. We have enough
of them. and the drama is bringing us a
better class since the dramatists began
showing up the Trailer side of human ma
ture."
1t was time for him to return.
II AVE until cock crow" he said, but l
guess Pll get back early. My wife will be
anxious. Coco night. Glad to have met
you. l will remember your kindness when
we meet below"
So we had another drink and tho devil
disappeared San Francisco Chronicle.
DIR. Liebig \ Co.'s Extensive Practice.
On account of enormous increase in prac-
tice the staff surgeon of Liebig's World
Dispensary, of Butte City and San Fran
cisco can spare but three days for Helena,