The San Saba news. [volume] (San Saba, Tex.) 1873-1966, 1891-08-07
Not In the Statutes.

Not In the Statutes.
Judge c., OF Vermont, was
fond of a joke, when IT could be
"done" without special injury to
public or individual rights.
On one occasion, as he was travel
~ toward the southern part of the
state, to hold a term of court in the
county of W, he came to a pub
lie house where a Justices court was
in session. As it was late, and the
weather cold and vet, he concluded
to put up for the night Sending
his horse 70 the stable, he entered
the barroom, which he found crowd
ed with people, who seemed greatly
excited about the case on trial. He
had thrown of his outer garments,
and was composing himself before a
good old-fashioned blazing fire, when
a young man came up to him, and,
bowling to him very respectfully, ask
ed his assistance in the ease.
THE evidence" he said, is allagin'
me; but they say Yer Honor IS death
on desperit cases, and mine amt so
bad as it might be, after all"
Upon inquiry, the Judge learned
that his applicant had been arrested
for wantonly upsetting a churn OF
sap in his neighbours sugar-lot. The
youngster had been caught in the
very act by two respectable witness
es, and thus the evidence was, as he
had stated, clear agin' him"
Alter hearing all the facts, tho
Judge informed him that it was
really q desperate case, but he add
ed:
Il will watch the progress of the
trial and if an opportunity presents
itself l will help you"
Accordingly he threw open the
door leading from his apartment
to the room where the trial was go
ing or and sat a careless spectator
oftheproceedings
Tbecouns-l for the State, put in his
testimony and proved the charge
conclusively. Thereupon the magis-
trate turned upon the respondentand
with a stern voice asked him if he had
got anything to say to all this ere
evidential testimony"
The prisoner was dumb, bat look
ed imploringly toward the Justice,
who ut once arose and approached
the table at which the Justice was
sitting.
You needn't think We can do any
kinder good here, for the mind of
this court is entirely made up about
this consarn, that can tell We, mis-
ter,
MAY it please Your Honor" said
the Judge, bowling very gracefully,
1T is no doubt true that the charge
made against the respondent is fully
SUSTAINED by the testimony. | do
not deny it, but for all that he has a
defense"
a defensel What is it," growled
the court.
"And, Your Honor, it is this:
profess to know little about law,
having practiced more than thirty
years past, especially the statute
laws of Vermont. Now. Your Hon
or, may be mistaken, but l am
confident there is nothing in the
statute books of Vermont against
either an empty churn ora
churn full of sap, beg of the court
not to rely upon my word, but if
Your Honor is not satisfied upon
this point would recommend an ex-
of the STATUTES
The counsel OF the state rose to re-
ply.
court, "this pint must be settled be
fore we move another inch"
And thereupon, Selling the statute
book and turning to the index he be-
gan searching uuder the letter c for
Churn. Not finding it he next look
ed under S for Sap. Not finding
''Sap" he continued his search under
L for Upsetting. Still unsuccessful
he looked under the title Grimes
and Misdemenors.' Finally he rum
aged the hook from beginning to
end, and finding it silent upon the
subject of ''upsetting churns'' he
arose, and addressing the prisoner.
said:
Young man, this ere court is sat
isfed that there amt nothin' in the
laws of Vermont agin tippin' over Il
churn full of sap. There amt moth
in about churns, anyway-nor sap,
nuther. But | want We should re
member one thing-that this ere
court has made up its mind that it's
n shame that there's so many maple
trees in the State and no law agin'
tippin' over sap
Wheroupon the prisoner was re-
leased.