davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
A LIAR FROM BASE

One, Jim Murray, in the Butte
Inter-Mountain, speaking of the route
of the Great Northern, has this to say,
among other clustering things:
"As far as Fairhavcn and the other
boom towns on the Sound are concerned"
said MIR. Murray, my experience with
them is that there is nothing there but
wind and water, and real estate men fur
nish the wind. | thought | was smart
IL cost me Just $4,000 It's all in Fair
haven, and | never expect to get It out.
After this Montana will be good enough
for me-"
Now the fact is that Murray never
owned dollars worth Of property in
Fairhaven, and has never been in this
city. A fact OF which Fairhaven
would be quite proud if the people
here knew who the fellow is. People
here who knew him in Butte say that
he boasts Of his slippery ways and
that he one time told committee of
church ladies, who had solicited him
for subscription TO some benevolent,
Christian scheme, that if he had an
honest dollar he would give it to them.
This is the only thing we ever heard
Of him that was an approach to
to decency: it was only such an ap-
proach in that it, the remark, sug-
gested that he had sufficient con.
science, Of a negative sort, TO refuse
TO give TO a worthy object money Sc
polluted as that obtained by hi,
methods. These ex-citizens of Butte
say also that he lived there
long time by "swipeing sleep
ers" on gaming tables. TC
those who know nothing Of gambling
the necessary explanation TO this /.
that "swiping sleepers" means the
gathering up Of small bets, here anC
there on gaming tables, that the
depostors have overlooked in giving
their attention to more important
bets. They also declare that Murray
is execrated by the people Of Butte
generally, and that he is considered
"a hard party" by all who know hin
best.
He is a fine specimen to be talkin,
about Fairhayen and about losing $50,
900 here. In the first place no mar
ever lost tenth part Of that sum il
Fairhaven at anything, in the mex
place every man who ever invested
money in Fairhaven real estate ha,
protited by it, and in the third place
Jim Murray is one Of the "sure thing
sort OF men, who wouldn't take {
chance TO lose anything anywhere un
less 1t was a law suit on
some trumped-up claim against tn,
place he lived in, Of which
sort of proceedings Butte has haC
much experience with this same jim
Murray. The fellow has tackled the
wrong place for once in his life
although he has done il at distance
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
An Advertising scheme.

''It's mighty hard work getting any free
advertising out of you newspaper people
nowadays" sighed the advance agent of a
mammoth allied circus as he passed a
stack of coin over the business office count
er the other morning.
Space is space" replied the affable
cashier. as he made out a receipt.
81 don't know why it is" continued the
A. A retrospectively, "but somehow edit
ors don't seem to bite as they used to.
Same on the eastern coast too. l noticed it
particularly on little snap worked way
down at Galveston"
"How was thar"
"Well, you see, was on my way to that
city by steamer a week in advance of our
show when | struck a great scheme.
bought two dozen empty pop bottles and as
many steaks from the steward. Then l got
lot of arsenic from the medical stores and
rubbed it into the steaks l put some OF
our bills in the bottles, tied a steak around
each and dropped 'em overheard as we en-
tered the harbor. My calculation was that
the sharks would swallow the meat, be
poisoned, float ashore, would be cut open,
the bills found and the whole thing be writ
ten up by the reporters in great shape"
"How did it work."
Like a charm-my part of it, mean.
Nine sharks altogether stood in with the
show, but every time one came ashore / got
a note from every editor in the place pro-
posing to write the thing up, with a snap
camera cut of the shark, at the regular
rates"
Pretty mean, that"
"Meanl Those fellows could give Shy
lock cards and spades. The only paper that
referred to it at all was one we gave sixty
four free passes to. The day we left town
it remarked that our show was enough to
kill blind nigger-let alone sharks. San
Francisco Examiner.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
WASTES AND BURDENS

Prof. Jeyins, speaking Of finance,
says paper, small coin, silver or other
representatives OF money" Ali!
That is just the truth, representa-
tives OF money" We habitually call
things money that are not money.
We do not make that mistake often
in speaking Of deeds to our land We
do not call the paper deeds our titles,
we know well that our title is some
thing very different and that the deed
is a representative or evidence OF title.
Just so is the bit Of gold silver or
paper the evidence or representative
OF our money. The money is a thing
wholly different. The curse OF the
time is that we allow our laws regu-
lating our finance to be based on the
false idea that gold is money and
nothing else is money. The evil OF al
lowing this inferior representative to
be recognized as the sole money is this:
First, 1t being scarce commodity one
or two men can mOnopolize it; sec
ond, it being scarce and the assump-
ton lie, necessarily nearly all bust
ness is done by other representatives,
mostly paper. Thus, the report OF
Powell to the London convention of
finance declares that "over ninety.
eight per cent. Of all the money in &C.
tual use is paper. These figures" he
adds, furnish grim satire on all our
thories about paper bills, money, etc
A grim satire. Indeed they are. But
do they not stand as a fearful warning
TO our persistence in that manner anC
folly that may be summed up under
the heading Of government, with It's
standing armies, its monstrous wastes
sinecures, its taxing Of the poor by
indirection, its whole time devoted to
trying to undo the ways of the past OF
inventing new and greater wrongs
Ninety-elght per cent. of money that
Is not money and is liable to force re.
demption by two per cent. gold at the
first noise OF any great coming panic
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
Thackeray and the Snowman.

Thackeray, who lost his mother when
about five years Of age, was taken in
charge of by his aunt, Mrs. Richie, who
was alarmed on finding that her husbands
hat fitted the boy. She accordingly took
him TO Sir James Clark. After an exam
instion the popular physician said;
Don't be afraid; he has large head,
but there is a great deal in it,"
rhackeray had not only large head,
but he was tall and large altogether. He
used to tell his own story of the travelling
Snowman whom he found one day sitting
dtsconsolate by the roadside because be
had just lost his giant. Thackeray asked
whether he might do for the place. Crit
ically aud seriously the Snowman exam
ined him and said:
"Well, you're nigh tall enough, but I'm
afraid you are too hugely. London Tit
Bits.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
This Date in History-May 5.

ts2-JustiniRn. most renowned Of byzantine
Roman emperors, born; died J65
ls12-Capture Of Oswego. y. ", by the British.
lsl7-George Washington Julian. statesman.
Original abolitionist," born near Center
vile, Ind
is2l-Napoleon Bonaparte died at st. Helena
ls+0-Rev. DIR. Liant Carpenter, theologian, died.
ls2-B Bloody battle at Williamsburg, Va.
lsB4-The dreadful Battle Of the Wilderness"
began: on the same day the contest at
Rocky Face Ridge, Ca, began; there were
also three cavalry battles and three gun
boat battles at widely separated points;
important battles.
lS75-Hcinrirh Gcorse August Ewnld. philolo-
gist, the1,ogian, historian and reforner,
died. born ia 1856.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
DEMOCRATIC OPINION OF
CLEVELAND

The Democrats are, TO a certain de-
gree, bound TO defend Cleyeland's adj
ministratiJn and speak well of him,
lest the failure to do so would be
taken as confession that he and his
policy-if he can truly be said to have
had a policy-were what John Phoenix
would call a grand united federal fail
ure. But the most Of them, even
while boasting of his good works, say
that they do not want any more OF
him. Cleveland success and Cad
mean victory are nearly the same,
only the election OF Mr.. Cleveland
proved TO be no honor to any one
while Cadmus' dear-bought victory
brought him immortal glory.
An instance Of this kind was pre-
scented TO us in this city yes
terday. A Democrat Of the strict
est sort visiting here, who was
honored by the Democratic presi-
dent with the best Office in his state,
says that while he feels great per-
sOnal kindness toward Grover,
and a certain degree OF gratitude to-
wards him; agrees with his views
against unlimited coinage Of silver
and goes far beyond him in the liber-
ality OF his tariff views, he feels also
that there are considerations lying
deeper than these, to-wit:
Had the party or even the conven-
tlon which named him known the
despicable personal record OF the man
IL is certain that he would not have
been nominated; but having put him
In the field IL would have been little
short Of faulty to have allowed him
TO be driven off his ticket by the kind
OF attack that was made. 1t would
have been unwise because IL would
have put a premium on SANDER,
although the attack on Mr.. Cleveland
early and middle life comprehended
only the truth. And he was shrewd
enough, and had sufficient presence Of
mind, even amid all his blubbering TO
Mrs. Beecher, about his mother, TO
know that to "tell TO truth" from his
side would be his best defence because
1t would set the limit and the bounds
TO his evil history.
"And what a base hypocrite he
must be" says our Democratic friend,
Ito have INDUCED every base passion
while nominally the custodian and
exemplar of his city's morals as may
ors are" Hence his denomination
was the most idiotic OF actions. As
governor he was at his best, and left
his best record; that was the circum-
stance which lifted him higher.
As president he prated and piated
but did nothing; his words will al.
ways read well, while the actions and
the things accomplished were nothing
but 1t will be forgotten, in the things
that are and are to be, how little Mr.
Cleveland did; how little even of what
he might have done.
Even his boosted tariff reform tall
was the yeriest trash. He conceded
that protection has built up our man
ufactures, that certain degree and
practice Of 1t is necessary to maintain
them and TO maintain the morale and
material condition OF our working
men: then he turned about and advo-
Gated an attack on this policy.
He believed that protection is good,
yet asked free raw material. Now II
there is to be protection, the wool
grower, the hide and leather man, the
lumberman and everyone who deals In
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

The Alba Haywood entertainment
at Thistle's opera house tonight comes
with the strongest endorsements Of
the press and public and the evidences
are that a very large audience will be
in attendance upon this, the occasion
of the company's first appearance in
Fairhaven. This city is remarkably
fond Of good music and this company
has some famous musicians in it, and
numerous other highly entertaining
specialties.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
Antiaui,v of Familiar Anecdotes

Some of the stories that were told of
Abraham Lincoln had a rage in Athens in
the Fourth century ID. c., when they were
told Of Alexander the Great; and some of
the stories commonly told of General But
Ter have been associated with smart persons
30 far back that they shade off into demon
ology Boston Transcript.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

essTimes: $. A. Bushman has re-
turned from a trip to Fairhaven, where
he has been writing up the town for the
North American Review. lie says that
he was better supported by the residents
town on the Sound. Mr.. Bushman was
formerly connected with the Rainier
hotel. and returns to Seattle to see the
president.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

Olympia Tribune: mo one has init
mated that Governor Ferry should call a
session of the Legislature as party meas
ure. Press Times.
The above is falsehood: Read the
following:
Grays Harbor Times: The Seattle
Press Times says the extra session agita-
tion Is not a partisan movement. A re-
cent very extended article in the Press
Times, favoring the special session, was
headed in glaring black letters, ITO Save
the Party Comment would be super
nuOus
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
DOROTHY.


Dorothy Is debonair
LITTLE count hath she or care;
All her gold is In her hair.
And the freshness of the spring
Round this old world seems to cling
When you hear her laugh or sing.
On her sunny way she goes;
Much she wonders-httle knows
Loves as yet folded rose.
All her smiles in dimples die;
Glad Is she, nor knows she why
Just to live Is ecstasy
Lightly lie the chains, methinks,
That have daisies for their links;
Youths the fount where pleasure drinkn
Dorothy is debonair;
Little count hath she or care;
Sunshine in her heart and hair.
N. Hedderwick Browne In Chambers Journal
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
How to be Great

Nooksack Reporter: Young man, do not
be discouraged. Though you may never
draw the salary of congressman or be
sent to represent your government in a
foreign land, the opportunity for becom
ing great baseball player is waiting for
you TO grasp IL with both hands and make
IL yours. Seize bat and proudly pound
your way to honor and renOwn.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

Express: All the lumber and shingle
mills on the bay with the exception of
the Cornwall mild are running on full
time and have no trouble in disposing of
their out put. The end of the Chilean
war will again open the South American
lumber trade of the sound, when we may
reasonably expect lively times for the
millmen.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
When Spring Wheat Will Spring

Walla Walla journal: Farmers tell us
that winter wheat is looking fine, but
spring wheat is little backward, yet if
we had a good shower it would spring
right up like Jack in the box.
We have a few showers that could well
be spared.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
Worthy of His Hire

Spokesman: Whatcom's volunteer fire
ladies threaten to strike unless their pay
is raised to 81 per alarm and 50 cents per
hour for actual service. A fireman is
worthy Of his hire, and the compensation
demanded by the WhatcOm boys does not
strike one as excessive.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

only has the government Of the kaiser
against him, but the socialists also,
and we may witness the strange
spectacle OF a union between the
Socialists and the friends of the crown
in order to defeat the old Iron Chan
cpllor
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
Something That VIII Strike Him

Tacoma Ledger: In recent interview
Governor Ferry is reported as saying he
had not yet given the vetoed WATSON bill
a critical examination When he does do
so he will possibly be struck with that
section which gravely provides that par
ties who do not like it may appeal to the
courts
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
PUBLIC NOTICE. $50 REWARD

A considerable number OF complaints have
reached this office that certain parties are
In the Gabit OF stealing papers from sub
scribers. Immediately after delivery.
A reward OF s25 will be paid for infOrma-
tlon leading To the arrest and conviction
OF the offenders.
FABnAvES PUBLISHING Co.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
What 1t Costs

Tacoma News: Seattle has raised
s., 800 for the presidents reception. That
is about $500 an hour for each hour of the
presidents visit. Tacoma pays $3.50 an
hour for each OF the two hours the presi-
dent is to be here
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

The Mayer Smith Grocery Co. are mov-
ing their large stock Of staple and fancy
groceries into p. II. Smiths new building.
on west side OF Eleventh street, between
Harris and Mill streets, where the wants
Of their patrons will receive prompt and
courteous attention. 1884
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
THE UNIVERSITY MEETING

Don't forget the university meeting
at Thistle's opera house next Thursday
night. The building OF the university
would be the biggest thing that Fair
haven landowners could do to increase
the value Of their lands. A good
strong pull, altogether, would fix it,
and for the $25OOOO worth of land,
much Of which has already been sub
scribed, the value of lands in this vi
cinity would be increased millions.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
SALE OF
SdWmill MdChinGru

Notice Is hereby given that the under
signed will. on Monday. the 4th day of May,
1891, at II o'clock in the forenoon, sell at pub
lie auction to the highest bidder the sawmill
machinery and fixtures, including one l6N2O
two 42xl6 It. tubular boilers, one u It. bolter
together with all fixtures and piping, one No.
3 Delameter steam pump one 30 in. Lew
ely heater, one double circular sawmill with
three wrought iron patent head blocks, one
bull wheel, one friction log canter. trimmers,
shafting, pulleys. coupling. wood rolls, one
Everett single mill, one single jOinter,
sawdust cOnveyOrs, one tenoner. one Fay
single planer, one Daniels palmer together
with all necessary fixtures and saws; the
same being a complete sawmill, single mill
and sash and door plant. The sale will take
place on the premises, viz: The sawmill
known as the Seattle Mill Cos mill. situated
on block 20, Judkin's addition to the city OF
Seattle, Washington. Terms cash.
j. r. LEWIS. Trustee.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
Crop Prospects

Review: The crop outlook is glorious
Prices are up. Away with the croaker
and away with gloom. Eastern Wash
ington is in smiles, and the world smiles
with n
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

Olympia Tribune: That falsehood
started by snarling envy relative to the
state agent costing the state se00OOO is
now on its way through the state press.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
THEY SAY


Review: Judge PETER was once given a
leather medal for being the champion
oyster eater. Hereafter he will pose as a
ola m
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

Lynden in this county is the What
com headquarters Of tie Farmers
Alliance. The politicians will be seen
this summer trying for a seat "under
the Lynden tree" whiting for the
next campaign.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

The great contest between Bismarck
and his opponents will be settled at
the polls in Germany, today He not
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

The unity Of the Australian prov
inces and the formation of the Aus
tralian commonwealth will probably
cause considerable discussion in the
British parliament, as the new com
monwealth desires to deal with ques-
tions over which the mother country
desires TO retain exclusive control.
One Of these questions relates to the
Pacific islands, especially Samoa, the
Hebrldes and Madagascar. Other
states of Europe and the United
States have so much interest in these
that questions relating thereto may
have to be settled by a greater force
than Australia can command The
Australian federation means free
trade among the provinces and a
tariff on British imports, which is not
objected to by the mother country.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

Don't make any arrangement for
next Thursday night that will prevent
your attendance upon the university
meeting. That is the most import
ant subject on hand at this juncture.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

East Washington papers are having
a political Fairweather boom. Now
if we could only have an out OF doors
fair weather boom, the earth would
rejoice and things would grow faster.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

ern advertisers is called to the FAniHAvEN
HERALD as "A 1udlcious advertising medium.
Heretofore no foreign advertising OF any de-
scription has been received.
COntrdCtS Eeesiyed through all the re-
agencies.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

Reciprocity with Mexico is near at
hand. and with Brazil and Cuba, will
give this new feature Of trade a splen-
did start.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

De Rudini still wants indemnity.
A great many people want the earth
who will not get it.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

The WhatcOm Express has been en-
larged and comes out in a brand
splinter new spring dress. Colonel
De Tierre has associated Morris Nc
Carly with him in the proprietorship
of the publication and there is a look
of prosperity about the concern that
is pleasant to behold. Colonel De
Tierre carries to the reinyigOrated
establishment his entire plant, which
was good sense, good humor and a
lead pencil and Mr.. McCarty has sup
piled the presses and type and an avail
able fund. The HERALD greets the
Express fraternally, and hopes to see
it come to the front like Winklereid Of
old and do much better than he did
after-for he died.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05

The OlYmpian says, at looks as if
the extra session movement was
dead" 1t was never fully alive; the
hen that incubated it went Off the
nest with another chick, the first that
came. The shell was picked from the
second by tender hands and nursed in
some lannels, but when placed under
the old hen for nourishment, she gave
too much attention to the first chick,
stepped on the second, which was al
ready premature and powerful
weak" and the poor thing "died
again" 1t wasn't good stock anyhow,
and was never much more than a
bad egg.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-05
Eastern Advertisers :

SUBSCRIBE NOW
Los Angeles herald., 1891-02-03
CLEVER CLERKS.
Southern California Letter Stickers
Officially Commended.

Soutnern Sanf0rn1a Letter SUCKERS
Officially Commended. III
Captain James E. White, general
superintendent of the railway postal
service, writes to Assistant Superintend-
ent SamuelFlint of this division, COM
mending the railway postal clerks upon
their official examinations for the fiscal
year Of 1890, throughout the eighth
division. He says it is exceedingly
gratifying to his office, as evidence of
the steady improvement made in the
efficiency of the service for some time
past. He hopes this will continue, and
concludes by saying that in view of the
marked success Of the past, all clerks
ought to feel much pride. The letter
particularly refers to postal clerks here
in Southern California. Among them are
a number whosstand with the high aver
age of $3.50 per cent, just q fiftieth part
of a hundred from being perfect. In fact,
the clerks in the southern part of this
state are away ahead in their examina-
tions of those centering in San Fran
cisco, Portland, Ogden, Seattle and other
coast points. Postmaster General Wan
amaker's medal for proficiency was
awarded to a clerk on the Ogden and
San Francisco railway postoffice. It
should have fallen to some clerk here in
Los Angeles, as many of them stand
second to none.