davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Coconino sun., 1891-10-29
What Makes Dudes.

A professor at Ann Arbor, Mich, was dil cussing the process of fertiliz- ing plants by means of insects carry ing the pollen from one plant to an other, and, to amusc them. told how old maids were the ultimate cause of it all. The humble bees carry the pollen; the field-mi cat the humble bees; therefore. the more iield-mice, the fewer humble bees and the less pollen and variation of plants. But cats devour iield-micc, and old maids protect cats. Therefore, the more old maids, the more cats, the fewer field mice, the moro bees. Hence old maids are the cause Of variety in plants. Thereupon, a asophomore, with a single eys-glass, an English um- brella . box-coat, with his trousers rolled up at the bottom. arose and asked: II sa-a-y, professah. what is the cause--ah h-=of old maids. don't you knowPn Per aps Miss Johes can tell you suggested the professor. 'Dudes!' said Miss Jones, sharply
 and without moments hesitation,
The Coconino sun., 1891-10-29
WOLVES HUNTING BUFFALoEs.
An Attack Upon a Veteran Bull by
 Pack of the Animals.

An Attack Upon a Veteran Bull by
 Pack of the Animals.
 A far Western traveller gives the following account in the New York Ledger of an attack by wolves on a buffalo, in the days when both wolves and buffaloes swarmed ou the great Western plains:
 During my travels in those regions l have several times come across such gang of these animals surrounding an old or wounded bull, where it would seem from appearances that they had been for several days in a. tendance, and at intervals desperately engaged in the effort to take his life. But a short time since, as one of my hunting companions and myself were returning to our encampment with our horses loaded with meat we discov- cred at distance a huge bull en- circled with a gang of white wolves.
 We rode up as near as we could without driving them away, and being, within pistol-shot, we had q remark ably good view, where 1 sat for few moments and made a sketch in my notebook, aftere which we rode up and gave the signal for the wolves to disperse, which they instantly did, withdrawing themselves to the dis tance of fifty or sixty rodsi when we found, to our great surprise, that the animal had made desperate resistance until his eyes were entirely torn out of his head, the gristle of his nose was mostly gone, his tongue was half bitten off, and the skin and flesh of his legs were torn almost literally into strings.
 'ln this tattcrcd and torn condition the poor old veteran stood bracing up in the midst of his tormentors, who had ceased hostilities for few min utes to enjoy sort of barley, recover ing strength and preparing to resume the attack in a few moments. In this group were some reclining to gain breath, while others were sneaking about and licking their chops in unx- iety for a renewal of the attack; and others, less lucky, had been crushed to death by the feet or horns of the bull. rode nearer to the pitiable ob- ject as he stood bleeding and trembling before me, and said to him: Now is your time, old fel ow, and you had better be off" Though blind and nearly destroyed, there seemed evil dently to be recognition of a friend in me. as he strengthened up, and trembling with excitement dashed off at full speed upon the prairie in straight line.
 We turned our horses and resumed our march. and when we had advanced a mile or more we looked back and on our left where we saw again the ill., fated animal surrounded by his tor mentors to whose unsuitable voracity he unQuestionably soon fell victim"
The Coconino sun., 1891-10-29
A MEDIAEVAL CHURCH,
A Great Number of Men Were Necessary
 to Conduct It's Work.

As for the vast numbers actually maintained by the church, the single example of St. Pauls Cathedral, of course the largest foundation in the city, will furnish an illustration. In the year l450 the society. the cathed- ral body, included the following: the bishop, the dean, the four archdea- cons the treasurer, the precentor, the chancellor thirty greater canons. twelve lesser canons, about fifty chap lains, or chantry priests, and thirty vicars. Of inferior rank to these were the sacrist and three vergers, the suc- centor, the master of the singing. school, the master of the grammar school, the almOner and his four vergers, the servitors, the surveyor the twelve scribes, the book transcriber. the bookbinder, the chamberlain, the rent-collector. the baker, the brewer-the brewer, who brewed in the year 12S6, 67,8l4 gallons, must have employed a good many; the baker, who ovened every year 40,000 loaves, or every day more than a hundred, large and small, employed a good many more-the servants of all these officers-the singing-men and choir boys of whom priests were made the bedesmen and poor folk, the sextons, grave-diggers, gardeners bell-ringers, makers and menders of the ecclesias- tical robes, cleaners and sweepers, carpenters, masons painters, carvers and gilders-one can very well under stand that the Church of St. Paul's alone must have found livelihood for thousands.
 The same equipment was necessary in every other religious foundation. Not monastery but had its greater and lesser officers and their servants. In every one there were the bell-ring- CTS, the singing men and boys. the vergers, the gardeners, the brewers, bakers, cooks, messengers, scribes, rent collectors. and all complete as was St Paurs, though on smaller scale. It does not seem too much to estimate the ecclesiastical establish ments of London as including fourth part of the whole population of the city. y.-Harper's Magazine.
The Coconino sun., 1891-10-29
HOOK AND CROOK"
Who Were They and What Was the
 Origin Of the Phrase.

There have been many attempts made to explain the origin of the phrase. By Hook or Crook" The Boston Newsletter of January, 1776, explains the expression thus: Hook and Crook were the names of two Eng fish judges at the beginning of the last century. They were both men of eminence in their professions, but not more remarkable for anything than for the perpetual diversity of opinion that prevailed between them on mat ters of legal jurisprudence. Be the case what it would, every suitor was sure to have Hook or Crook on his side"
 Wilson's Origin of Familiar Words and Phrases says that it. probably means 'foully like a thief or holily like bishop" the hook being us d by burglars, the crook being the bish- ops crozier. ''The Hand- Book of Fact and Fancy gives the following story under the heading of By Hook or Crook" The great fire at Lon- don in 1866 destroyed l3, POO houses, and in many cases obliterated all the boundary marks requisite to deter mine the sites occupied by buildings previous to the fire. When the rub bish was removed disputes arose among the people as to the position and extent of their landed estates. These contentious promised not only intern nable lawsuits, but also de- layed the rebIilding of the city until they could be settled. Accordingly two of the mo experienced surveyors of the day, Mir. Chas. Hook and Mir. Geo. Crook, were called upon to act as arbitrators in the matter, land owners entering into compact to take the decision of Hook and Crook as final and binding. From this fact arose the now famous phrase which heads ths article.
 As fourth and last solution of the mystery, an old London legend tells us that the numerous families of Hook and Crook formerly. did the ferry business for the whole of the British metropolis No odds on what To 1t you crossed the Thames youwere sdrs to ride with Hook or Crook.
The Coconino sun., 1891-10-29
gNoLIsHMsN IN NEW YORK.
Obliged to Leave the Continent on Ac'
 count of Americans.

Obliged to Leave the Continent on Ac-
 count of Americans.
 The English colony in New York is largely made up of young men of cul- tured, leisurely habits, with epicuresn appetites and plebeian incomes. They are. for tue most part younger sons of good education and no calling or profession. In almost every case in- quiry elicits the fact that they are pensioners on home bounty. They are living on limited allowances-just enough to encourage responsibility such allowances being apparently doled out with the view to sustaining life without leaving margin enough for dissipation or return ticket. In fact, in many instances. the allowance is made conditional on remaining abroad. If they should violate this condition it is work or starve. Under the circum- stances, it would seem that conti- mental life would be preferable, in view of it's cheapness. but these young men prefer America. Americans are kinder to Englishmen, says one of these young men. than the people of continental Europe. We have worked that section of the earth trifie threadbare. They do not like us. When it comes to India, Australia. Canada or any of the English colonial possessions. we prefer the United States. It costs more to live here, but the life is worth living. Society receives us whether we have money or not. In London I would be an office drudge and limited to boarding house society. Here a well-educated, agree able English gentleman is well thought of, and can dine at the expense of somebody else good deal of the time.
 Speaking of Englishmen in New York suggests the recent plaint of a very well-to-d do Britisher of the female sex now in this city, says New York exchange. 'You know there are no distinctive resorts for English people abroad" she said. We used to go to Scotland. but the rich Americans over ran the country and gobbled up every available estate. Then we tried Brighton, but bless you. the hotel people there will not look at an Eng lishman where he conflicts with an American. They next drove us out of every fashionable resort on the conti- nent lastly the Riviera our special stronghold.
 We have no longer the exclusive social sway anywhere outside of Eng land. It used to be that the Swiss and German watering place hotels were run chiefly in the interest of the English traveller. Now the American has it all his own way. There are now more Americans living in villas about Florence, Como, Rome, Dresden, Lucerne and the German spas than Englishmen. Even Paris is getting to be dominated by the stars and stripes. What are we going to do?' Come to America" l suggested. Here. at least, the American is small potatoes and few in a hilL' Hero Anglo mania rages worse than pleuro-pne mona. Come to America, unhappy. out awed, dethroned people of an ef- fete civilization. and come with con- tidence and subsequently, cash. Here you will find newer growth in New York to fall down and worship you
The Coconino sun., 1891-10-29
HOW INSECTS BREATHE.
First Catch a Wasp or Hornet Before
 You See With Naked Eye.

First Catch a Wasp or Hornet Before
 You See With Naked Eye.
 If we take any moderately large in- sect, say wasp or a hornet we can see. even with the naked eye. that a series of small, spot-like marks run along the side of the body. These apparent spots, which are IS or 20 in number, are, in fact the aperatures through which air is admitted into the system, and are generally formed in such manner that no extraneous matter can by any possibility find en- trance. Sometimes they are furnished with pair of horny caps, which can be opened and closed at the will of the insect; in other cases they are densely fringed with stiff, interlacing bristles forming filter, which allows air, and air alone to pass; but the apparatus, of whatever character it may be, is so wonderfully perfect in its actions that it has been found im- possible to injure the body of dead insect with even so subtle medium as spirits of wine, although the sub- ject was first immersed in the fluid and then placed beneath the receiver of an air pump. The aperatures in question communicate with two large breathing tubes, which extend through the entire length of the body. From these main tubes are given of innu- merable branches, which run in all directions and continually divide and subdivide. until wonderfully intri- cate network is formed. pervading every part of the structure and pene- trating even to the autenna.
The Coconino sun., 1891-10-29

 Syrup"

For children a medi- A Cougn cine should be abso- and cro,,n lutely reliable. A
 mother must be able to Medicine. pin her faith to it as to
 her Bible. It must contain nothing violent, uncertain, or dangerous. It must be standard in material and manufacture. It must be plain and simple to admin ister; easy and pleasant to take. The child must like it. It must be prompt in action, giving immedi- ate relief, as childrens' troubles come quick, grow fast, and end fatally or otherwise ill a very short time. It must not only relieve quick but bring them around quick, as children chafe and fret and spoil their constitutions under long con fnement. It must do its work in moderate doses. A large quantity of medicine in a child is not desira- ble. It must not interfere with the child's spirits, appetite or general health. These things suit old as well as young folks, and make Be- schee's German Syrup the favorite family medicine. o
The Coconino sun., 1891-10-29
PILES 2! ] s j||| ;j 5 instant relief and is an in-
 fallible Cure for Piles. ' Price q. By Druggists or
 ~ mail. Samples free, Ad- dress ~ANAKESIS," U 0 - uU - Box 28l6 New York City.
SILK THAT MAKES DANCER.
The Liability to Spontaneous Combustion
 Makes It Very Risky Freight.

The Liabuity to spontaneous comp ustlon
 Makes It Very Risky Freight.
 The recent discussion as to whether ocean liners should carry cotton as well as passengers has brought out another fact, At present importers here" gentleman said to New York Recorder reporter, are receiv- ing large consignments of heavy dyed silk, known as French twist The French manufacturers do not spare the dye on the goods, for 1t adds to their weight. In this dye chemicals of a peculiar kind are used, and it is this fact that makes this silk danger ous freight.
 There is always fear of spontan- eous combustion unless the greatest care is taken packing the goods. These come in bales of various sizes, but generally averaging 300 pounds They are wrapped in cotton bagging. with underlaying layers of straw and brown paper, and are made compact by hydraulic pressure. There have been cases where bales have been destroyed from the causes mentioned and not many years ago serious fire was caused on French steamer by these goods.
 Steamship meu generally say that they are aware of the danger of carry ing these silks, and that the greatest care is taken whenever they are car ried as freight. One or two lines, in: deed discriminate against thls freight and will not carry it.
The Coconino sun., 1891-10-29
IN ITS WORST FORM.

BENTON, LAT. Co.,, Wis.,, Dec., '83. Rev. J. c. Bergen vodches for the following: James Rooney, who was suffering from St. Vitus' Dance in ifs worst form for about IA years, was treated by several physicians without effect; two bottles of Pastor Koen g's Nervo Tonic cured him.
The Coconino sun., 1891-10-29
THE MOST R E: EI... E A E |. E

To correct the constipated habit, remove sick headache, relieve dyspepsia, to purify the blood, cure jaundice. liver complaint, and biliousness, Ayers Pills are un- equaled. They are an excellent after-dinner pill, assisting the pro- cess of digestion, and cleansing and strengthening the alimentary canal. When taken on the invasion of cold or fever, they effectually pre- vent further progress of the disease. Being sugar-coated and purely veg etable, they are the best
The Coconino sun., 1891-10-29

A MONTREAL LETTER. The True Witness and Chronicle, Montreal, Can., published Oct. 24, SS: We are in receipt Of letter from one of our wel-known citizens, MT. E. holsvert, who writes that upon recom- mendation of the most Rev NJ. Marchand, of Drummontlville, he was induced to use for that most dreadful of all nervous diseases, FITS few bottles of Pastor Koen g's Nerve Tonic; nd is glad to say that after having suffered tor eight years is now entirely cured, and heartily recommends all sufferers of nervous diseases to try this remedy.
The Coconino sun., 1891-10-29
Trade Losing Ground.

The tea trade of Japan is constantly increasing, while that of China is diminishing The increase Is at the rate of more than $500 0Jo pounds yearly. Most of the Japanese tea is consumed in the United States and Canada,
The Coconino sun., 1891-10-29

medicine, for old and young. Ayers Pills are indispensable to soldiers, sailors, camp CTS, miners, and travellers, and are every where recommended by the medical fra ternity. Dr. J. w. Haynes, Palouse, W. T., writes: Ayers Pills are the most evenly bal anced in their ingredients, of any know of"
 "For more than twenty years have used Ayers Pills as corrective for torpidity of the stomach, liver, and bowels, and to ward of malarial attacks, and they have always done perfect work" - F. F. Goodwin, Pub fisher Democrat, St. Landry La.
 "I was master of sailing vessel for many years, and never failed to provide Q supply of Ayers Pills, for the use of both off cers and men. They are safe and reliable
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1891-06-03
New York Times on the Land Tax.

The great advantage of a tax upon
land is that it can be equitably adjusted
and economically collected, that there
can be no escape or evasion, and that it
will bear upon value that is absolute
ly proportional to the profitableness Of
it's occupation and use. In other words,
it will be proportional to the wealth
that is employed in the use OF the land.
which, directly and indirectly consid-
cred, is the entire wealth Of the com.
munity. The tax will necessarily be
paid out of the surplus of production.
When the tax is levied anywhere be-
tween the land and the wealth accounts.
lated from its use, It falls upon the ~
tive agencies of production, and inter
feres with their activity and fruitful.
ness. This induces inequality Of bur.
dens and efforts to escape, and wheH-
ever the pressure is greater in one place
than another, there will be shifting OF
ground as inevitably as air or water
moves in the direction of the least re.
sistance. In our efforts at tax reform
we are driven more and more back to
the land, or to what is called real prop.
erty, as the true basis of public reve-
annaS
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1891-06-03
THE .RREPReSSIBLE BOY.

He worried the cat,
He PLAYED rat-tat-tat
,on the window panes, fully an hour by the
clock;
He tried roller skates
Where dishes and plates
In Jeopardy lay, till some fell, with a shock.
With an Indian yell
On n dolls house he fell,
And added that poor doly's scalp to his belt;
Then knocked off its toes,
And its fair Grecian nose,
,,,-,icb game was of wax-he proceeded 10 melt.
Two tubs he upset
Without one regret:
r,e stood on his head till his face turned sky
blae;
A curtain ne tore,
And then sighed for more
1ryeutively mischieyous things he might do.
He hid granny's specs
But that didn't vex;
usr face frightened up with his fun and his
noise.
lone sweet kiss repaid
For allm so she said,
,Resigningly adding that boys will be boys"
But strangest of all,
At nights quiet fall,
say:
Good night, mamma dearl
Good night, papa, dear
i've tried hard to be such u good boy to day."
George Cooper, in N. Y. Independent.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1891-06-03
WONDERS OF THE EAR.
a Department of Human Anatomy That
Deties the Surgeon.


"The human ear said a scientist to
reporter, lis an organ the true in
wardness of which the physicians have
never been able to get at. They can
examine the interior of the eve with
ease by throwing into its dark chamber
a ray of light reflected from a little
mirror, and of late they have found it
possible even to see the gray matter of
the brain by looking through the little
canal by which the optic nerve enters.
The cavity behind the nose they inspect
with the aid of light placed far back
in the mouth. They have no difficulty
in seeing into the stomach by an
electric apparatus; the intestines like
wise are readily enough investigated,
and the bladder also. Bnt the ear. as
to it's internal arrangements, is nnap-
proachable. tbs even impossible to dis
sect it satisfactorily after death, for the
parts collapse at once when the vital
spark leaves the body. The drum in a
living person bars the way to obserwa-
ton, and, even though it be pierced,
the winding passages beyond can not
be seen through. On the other side of
the drum are the three little bones-the
mallet, the anvil and the stirrup-which
act upon each other as levers. The drum
acts as sort of buffer, aud the
mallet, Immediately in contact with
it, conveys the sound waves through
the anvil and the stirrup to the
'choclea,' spiral shell-shaped chamber
just behind and above the external
opening of the ear. This shell is COM
posed of filaments of the auditory nerve,
coiled spirally and each one erect and
waving TREMENDOUSLY in response to the
slightest waves of sound. They carry
the sound impressions directly to the
brain, and so delicate is their sensitive
ness that the nearer perceives not only
the degree of loudness, but even the
finest quality of a sound the harmony
of tones, and the distance from which it
comes The moment that life becomes
extinct however, the spiral shell Of
nerves collapses and the marvellous
organ is dead thing, unsatisfactory
to the investigating anatomist.
If only it had been found
possible to examine the internal
structure of the living ear aural surgery
might. perhaps, amount to something
to-day. The science of treating the eye
was born when Helmholtz invented the
simple Instrument called the ophthal-
moscope for inspecting the interior.
There are plenty of ear doctors, and
people pay big prices for being treated
by them for deafness, but did you ever
know of a case where the patient was
really much benefited by anything he
could do? | have known dozens of deaf
persons who have persistently sought
relief at the hands of aural specialists,
but not one of them has been cured OF
materially helped, simply because
science has achieved hardly anything in
that branch of knowledge. Wa hing'
ton Star.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1891-06-03
Men Are Alike About Fires.

'.There is one thing" said the man
from the upper part of the state,
(which, I find, shows that we are all
of the same blood. 1t is a fire. Of
course, when there is fire in coun-
try town we all go to it. 1t is a rare
thing and we find it feature of the
season. Besides that we generally take
a hand in hauling out furniture or max
ing ourselves useful in other ways.
Now. you New Workers get just as ex-
cited and interested over fire as we
do, and your fires are SO frequent that
they have not the merit of novelty,
while you know that there is nothing
which you can do to be of service, be-
cause your police and fremen will not
let you get near the blaze. But l notice
that you all, boys and men, go chasing
after a fire as fast as your legs will car
ry you. You have only to hear the
clang of the engine to see a running
crowd, or to catch sight of the smoke
and away you go, following in the wake
of younger and more agile men. That's
Just what we do in the country
Y. Tribune.