The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-10-17
BRIGHT BITS.
He had not fred gun in many years
And the one he owned was rusted;
Hence this epitaph and our tears.
Because-the blamed thing busted.

THE summer coat that "Cholly" wore,
And set the girls all raving.
Can now be seen from to
Behind the counter waving.
-Clothier aud F1Lrnisher.
20, BERTHA, am horribly unfortunate You
know how love that young dentist, Reichel?
I've tried everything to- show him like him.
This is the sixth tooth I've allowed him to pull
for me, and he don't seem to understand the
depth of my devotion even yet"-FHe0ende
| Bldtter.
UNCLE MosE-Big thunder storm yesterday.
| Lightnin' struck me right on de head.
Employer-You don't say so. Get hurt
| much?
| Uncle Mose-Guess 1t did. reckon mex
| time dot lghtn n will look to see whar it's
| goin'.-Good Meas.
| MR. BINGo- see that Bramble is making his
| fortune among the Indians.
Mrs. Bingo-Why, it is only short time ago
that you tol me they had robbed him of every
| thing he had.
Blu yo-Tnle; but he succeed I'd in getting an
appointment as Indian agent.-BrOOklyn Life.
EXPERIENCED TRAVELLER lat railway restau-
rant when did that man at the other table
| give his order:
| Waiter-'Bo ten minutes ago, sab.
| 'What did he order!'
! "Beefsteak and fixin's, sab"
How much did he fee your"
| Quarter sab. "
| "Well. here's half a dollar. COOK him an
| other steak and bring me his.
| Yes, sab. Good NeI0S
| SINGLETON I'm sorry TO hear that you have
trouble with your wife. What's the matter?
Benedict-It's her way of talking. She says
| the most cutting. Ironical things to me on every
| occasion. Never misses a chance to spring
something horribly sarcastic. It's dreadful, l
tell you.
| Singleton - Well. you knew her long
| enough before you were married to learn of the
| trait.
Benedict-o, did; but took it for wit then.
Buffalo Netrs.
| A COUPLE of schoolboyS were coming along
jefferson avenue the other day talking about
| their teacher and whether or not women or
men were bitter in that capacity.
Women are all right, tad the older one,
sententously. ''in some OF the branches, but a
| woman can handle mathematics"
| Cant sher' exclaimed the younger one,
| with extreme interest. Cant she! Well, you
| ought to have seen Miss Blank throw an arith-
metic at me one day, and you'd change your
| nind.--DetrOit Free Press.
Now. Mr.. Malodor, how many coordinate
| branches OF government are there in this coun-
| tryE'
-Four. sir"
Four? Name them. please"
w L. there's the legislative branch"
| That's oue."
The administrative"
| Two"
| 1.-THE judicial
Three. Isn't that all?"
no. sir; there's Russell Harrison "-Detroit
| Free Press.
II VICTORY does not perch this fall upon the
| standards OF the Fsssett family OF Elmira, it
| will not be for lack of stan laris to perch on.
| Toe Fassett Children have entered their don
| key at the Chemung county fair and the Fas-
| sett father has Teen entered by Thorn IS Plat
| and ct iers as re publican candidate for gov
| ernor of New York Candor c)mpels the ad-
| mission that The children's entry has much the
better prospect of pulling OF a prize The
| donkey's views on civil service reform are not
/
have a considerable advantage over Mr.. Platt s
| entry.-Ltfe.