The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-01-09
BRIGHT BITS


YoUNG Docroh-I prescribed for my first
patient yesterday.
10 Ing Lawyer (anxiolsly)-Has he made his
will yet?-Puck.
IF YOU gave less expensive presents to peo-
pie, you could have better apartments than
these"
Il know; but shouldn't get half so many
good dinners. "--HdrDey's Bazaar.
MISS MISUNDERSTANDING of names. think
Mr.. Charles F. Sylver-Yaas; so do l. That's
my middle name" Gaming COURAGE Err
What do you think OF .Syiver for name?-
BarDers BdzdT.
'YoUR name is julia Miler?'
Yes, your honor
TEL me how otd You are
twenty -fivs, Sonr honor,"
so! Well nov that you have given your
age we will admin Ster the OATH "-Flieqende
Batter
''FRoM the amount OF airs that man puts on
you'd think he owned the township, " remarked
q. new conner to rather unproductive section of
the CO, utry.
Goodness me, no. He doesn't own a foot of
land anyH here near here. That's what makes
him so stuck up. Washington Post.
A COMPLIMENT To / osToN.-In a New York
picture galery-First VlSitor--O, isn't that a
beau iful psimingl l shonid know il was Italy.
Sc otd isltor (readins description from the
cataloguel-View from Public Garden, Boston.
Bss.on Beacon.
FAREWELL LETTER OF BooKKEEPER-eD
Young Lady Since you have trans erred your
love 10 another have closed my account with
you. find myself your creditor by 800 marks
which spent for you and which now have to
ter ter. -" O'-' anu 'O''' = '''0s"1s 0'''-
BEowN-Tell me, do you think that Hobbs
ever rays what isn't exactly true?
Fogg-Well, SOU q not like TO charge Hobbs
fitness. q hall
one-hu1dredth part of the stories he tells he
must be the most creduloEs man alive.-Boston
Transcript.
Woe to the women that sew pillows to all
armholes," is a warning, says a ,criptural con-
temporary to be found in the eighteenth verse
of the fourteenth chapter of the book of
Ezekiel, in which, no doubt, the ancient
author, in his minds eye, looked down the dim
vista of future generate ms and caught glimpse
of the style of dress worn by the dear daughters
of Eve Of to-daY.-On CIT Bttzzdrd.
CRITICISM IN BROOKLYN. Editor-That per-
Torrance at the opera house Monday night was
the worst performance l ever Witnessed, yet l
see your artic puffs it up to the skies.
Dramatic Crtic-I had to. The company
will be here all the week, and the manager said
If | printed word against them he'd come
around with gun.
Editor-l see. Well, it's always wise to keep
on the safe side.
ONCE Boy crushing in)-Big mob at the door
goin' to saoot tie dramatic critic.
Critic (weakly)-I-l never thought of that
They must be the audience.-B ooklyh Life.
A DIALECT PoEM-The Philadelphia Times:
HE wanted the earn, like the rest of his kind
Yet he swore like trooper rants,
Because a car, passing alo the street,
Splashed a small blotch of mud on his pants -
This is a very handsome specimen of Phila-
delphia dialect The Boston poet would have
elaborated he idea about in this wise:
He wanted the earth, like the rest of his kind
Yet he swore like a crowd o. carousers,
q along
Splashed small blotch of mud on his trous-
ers."
Philadelphia Is Justly proud of her scrapple
of G. w. Guilds, and of the ability of her citi-
Zens to pronounce Schuylkill in one syllable but
her culture is painfully deficient. -Indiana polis
Journal