The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1891-01-22
PuNoENr PARAGRAPHS.

OOA144S HAbn ndllltb H0bbAiiR W
be nearly as dangerous as trying to
thrash an editor.-Ram's Horn.
The way to do any thing that is
hard to do, is to roll up your sleeves and
go right at Trans Horn.
"A level surface is fiat, but there is a
distinction between a level-headed man
and flat-headod one Pittsburgh
Chronicle Telegraph.
-Whangle-"So Peck is dead, is he?
What were the old fellows last words?'
Jangle-''He didn't have any. His wife
was with him when he died. - - Boston
Traveller.
Accommodating - Johnson-''Will
you please carry this demijohn to my
house, Jackson?" Certainly, if there's
anything in Yankee Blade.
The world rarely praises man un-
til after he dies" Generally
that's about all tho world can find to
praise him for. Epoch.
There is joy in heaven when prodi-
gal returns, but Didn't tell you SOP"
is the universal cry on earth when q
good man goes wrong. Rams Horn.
20, John, I've lost the diamond out
of my engagement ring" That's all
right so long as you didn't lose the ring
. itself, It's gold, you know. ."-Philadel-
phia Times.
-Husband-"Is this canned chicken
or canned lobster, Ethel?" Wife-''I
don know, John. The label had been
torn off the can before opened it." =
Somorville Journal
To lubricate his words. Miss De
Gimp Cooking through the samples Of
a drummer for "a material house1-
What do you carry this little oil can
for?" The Drummer-''I wear that under
my tongue when tackle rough Gus
toner. Jewellers Weekly ~.s
1t is said to have been discovered by
science that the wind always moves in
circle, but no explanation has been
made as to how it happens that when
the playful zephyrs seize hold of mans
hat they always make straight shoot
for the nearest mudpuddle. = Rams
Horn.
Wife (revisiting the scene of her
betrothal)-"I remember, Algernon, so
well when you proposed to me- How
painfully embarrassed you were!" Alger-
non Yes, dear; and l remember so
we'll how kind and encouraging you
we're, and how very easy you made it
for me, after all. ."-Harper's Bazaar.
The Change of Styles.-Mrs. Cumso
Passions make great changes in our
hired girls. used to be greatly both
cred by my servants borrowing my
dresses" Mrs. Banks-"And don't they
still trouble you?" Mrs. Cumso-''O,
no. 1t is my husband that is in for it
now. They borrow his clothes. -
Racket.
-Wise-"Why do you always carry
two cigar-cases?" "Well, you see, the
black one is for those I smoke myself,
and in the red one 1 carry those / give
to nv friends who have forgotten theirs,
and find that they are not very apt to
do that tl-o second time when they are
coming to my house. e."-Fliegende Blat-
ter
First Citizen-"No, sir; I'll never
give my vote to Brass If all reports
are true he has actually paid money for
votes" Second Ditto-"You don't mean
it; but whom can we vote for?''
'There's Smart" Eyes, but he's an
ignoramus and his regulations none Of
of the sweetest. Granted. But Smart
has given our church S1O0 and has
promised to double it next month. :"
$50? Well, guess on the whole we'd
better support Smart Anyhow, / can't
vote for Brass. detest bribery and re-
fuse to encourage it"-Boston Tran
script.