The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-06-19
sUNFLowER s1LHoUETTEs.
A short epitaph:
Here he slumbers-
Sliced cucumbers.

Sliced cucumbers.
The rape of PETERS beard will probably
be matter OF shear effort.
Mrs. Lease says she is moulding public
opinion Her kind is trifie moldy.
A Kansas man has named his airshil
| Time" and thinks it is sure to fly.
| The button house, at Topeka, is unani-
mously in favor of an extra session.
The only miracle Schweinfurth per
| formed was getting out of Kansas City
alive.
| let's his stacks of wheat get afrs and burn
down.
| 1t is understood that PETER will "girdle"
his whiskers, like a tree, and let them die
| that way.
The Alliance office that is seeking the
man has too much sense to look for him in
the cornfeld.
A Topeka hair-mattress factory has con-
| tracted for PETERS whiskers after they
have been cut off.
While the farmer is having his picnic in
the grove, the weeds are usually having a
picnic in the corn
Sol. Miller has wheat field in his back
yard and the probability is that it is all
covered with smut.
The Alliance is already getting into the
field with tickets, when plows would be
much more appropriate.
A Wichita man has a brilliant idea.
He is distributing sponges all through his
cornfield to absorb the extra water.
This is the time of year when a man has
two bottles of Jamaica ginger: One at
home and one at his place of business.
Since the Ellsworth molasses mine was
discovered, man over in the next county
has uuearthed a scaley layer Of pancakes.
The first thing Kansas man does after
a much-needed shower is to turn up the
bottom of his trousers and the corners of
his mouth.
The Florida Alliance is going to take
the capital away from Tallahassee and put
it at Ocala. What Kansas town does the
Alliance prefer before Topeka?
Attorney General Ives has decided that
the eight-hour law does not apply to the
state printers Office. The employees do
not work for the state, but for the state
printer.
A magazine called "Kansas Poetry and
Poets" will soon be started in New York
city. New York city is very old and
tough city, and is able to stand almost
anything.
The entire absence of news in regard to
Col. Tomlinson, shows how completely a
man from Kansas can be swallowed up
when he goes east without a beard and
with all his clothes on.
A tramp struck town the other day who
wanted TO bet he could double his money
within fifteen minutes. Somebody took
him up, and before the stakeholder and
several witnesses he took out a dollar bill
and folded it over.
Jerry Simpson recently wrote letter
back to an old friend. Among other
things he said: 81 don't find it such an
awful thing TO be great man. / can talk
easily, now, and even spelling is not the
bug-bare thought it was"
Washington Post: 1t is feared that a
lack OF state funds may result in all of the
Kansas lunatic asylums being closed and
the inmates allowed to go free. In such
an event there will be sure to be another
party organized in that state.
One of the Farmers Alliance songs
starts out with this stanza:
Oh, here we are as thus you see,
Each one farmers daughter;
We know just when to legislate
And when we hadn't oughter.
Governor Humphrey: 81 shall not call
an extra session of the legislature unless it
is absolutely necessary in order to keep the
state institutions running 1t has always
been understood that such laws applied
only to laborers who worked by the day.
l think there has been entirely too much
hubbub about the whole matter"