The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1891-12-25
FRED'S ADVENTURE.
Very Remarkable Outcome of q
Practical Joke.

Practical Joke.
The Roscville News was not great
paper. II did not subscribe to the Asso-
ciated Press. nor did il have special
correspondent at New York or Wash
ington. Oftimes the shears Wed with
the editorial pencil in filling out its
columns.
II had but one reporter. yet more
energetic, irrepressible. self-satisfed
PEN pusher than Fred Stokes seldom
existed. In = dearth of news. or amid
the pleasant lethargy OF good times, he
could fall back upon the reportorial
imagination. evolving from airy moth
ings succession Of rumors and prog
nostication with an unfailing shire wd-
ness that verged upon, yet never over
stepped, the dim line Of probability.
When not chasing the festive item or
cornering an elusive sensation, he
would assist the colonel. his editorial
chief. in the latter's more onerous
task. He would concoct poetic ard
taking advertisements. extract and re-
word the pith OF some great metropol-
itan editors opinions on the burning
issues" Of the day. skim the exchanges
all this in addition to other multi
say;oas duties. Often would the colonel
remove his cigar. elevate MS Lincolnian
legs and, Is the blue smoke curlcd up
ward. reward his satellite with jovial
nod Of approval, and say:
Fred. re boy, next 70 meself. the
coloners ancestral fluid was OF an
Irish tincture. and slight suspicion
'of brogue often intruded itself upon
his tongue. when the colonel grew in
terestcd. I'm indebted To We. and IL
ever We get INTO toight place. call
upon your chief. Gratitude. me son--a
--ahem' here's that account OF young
Shurtlcff's marriage. Terrible swell
affair that; we must shove Il in the
third column. editorial page. and lie
hanged to III"
Look here, colonel" said Fred. after
one OF these pleasant interjectional coll
loquies with his chief. there's a matri-
monial adj in the New York W for
wife: Wealthy Cuban--rich-pre
sumably unsophisticated wants to
Americanize himself. and as grand
preliminary step he wants an Ameri-
can wife. She must be young, hand
some. refined. and so on. Money not
essential. Address Zanaga. box Q X.
W Office. in confidence believe
III answer il; huge joke, you see.''
Here the colonel looked dubious
Perhaps we can work up something
stunning out Of this for the News.
Who knows?'
The colonel frightened enthusiastic
ally.
"Roight you are" said he. ..But II
will take exceedingly adroit manipula-
ton, me boy"
Fred considered the matter. and then
indited modest reply in . flowing
feminine hand, signing himself 1.-THE de-
ceitful rascaD Miss Nellie Jardine."
The colonel heard IL read with admira-
ton.
a roight tender and circumspcct re-
loindcr. II wouldn't surprise me now
II We wasn't born novelist, after ALL"
I'll give Sammis pointer. so he'll
know when the replies come in.' said
Fred Hes as pliablc as wax ever
since we doomed him for The Office"
">ammis knows where his bread is |
buttcred." returned the colonel. hut |
don't let him in too deep. He'll APP
prayciate the surprise Of the joke all |
me more when 1t does come OUT
- Sammis, the postmaster, was
Posted, not too wisely, however. Fred
mailed his letter. then carclessly
waited further developments In due
time came reply. Our Cuban ex- /
pressed his surprise and pleasure at
hearing SO assuringly from Miss Nellie
'ardinc, and said that, ont of score
p answers, hers was the one that |
pleased him most She alone. he con-
unned. with tropic ardor, was the one |
woman for him. lie felt IL, his heart |
'oid him so, and thus on, through sew
eral pages Of blind infatuity. lie con-
ended by hoping, praying, imploring
mat she would at once reply and cx-
change pictures with her adoring
slave
Eegad, sir" said the colonel. ''you
r. 70 for IL I behold already the con-
summation. Yen be DOMINIC petit
eoa's next, and the rcportorial d.
part'nent Of the News will feel IN
ting void. that il, when you're of 70
VIVA me boy"
frri laughed. Had he not. in his col
,,eEr days. correspondent with five young
.aues At once, three of whom he had
ever scen2 In the tenderly amative