The Helena independent. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1875-1943, 1891-05-05
THE BABOO'S ENGLISH.

innguaRo none ID hummer IMAM tnat winch
happens when the imperfectly educated
Bahoo puts pen to paper. Delightful ex-
amples find their way into the newspapers
sometimes; and now Mr.. Arnold Wright has
issued ''Baboo English AZ lis Writ"
Fisher Unwin), a very prettily bound little
volume, full of such gems as would natu-
rally come under the notice of an English
journalist in India. Mr.. Wright p~refaces
his book with Il brief sketch of indian
journalism which ID full of interesting and
amusing things.
Thus Mr.. Wright tells how an Anglo
Indian editor at once relieved his feelings
and increased his circulation: One we'll
remembered Instance of eccentrioity was
furnished somewhere in the forties by a
paper called the Mofussilite. which was to
the India of that day, what the Pioneer is
to ours. Tn great ecclesiastical dispute,
Gorham vs.. the Bishop of Exeter, was at
that time occupying mems minds and fill
ing the columns of the newspapers at home;
and though it might have been a very alb
sorbing topic to people in quiet country
towns in England, it had but faint interest
for Anglo-lndians. There was then no tele-
graph to India furnishing editors with
ulolpcl u COIHIueIlt, anu only Il
monthly mail to keep India in touch with
Europe. Any curtsiIment of thu supply of
suitable news by such u controversy was,
therefore,, rather a serious matter; and it
was no easy thing to make p~reseEtable ap-
pearance. The infection was borne in
silence for some time; but when at length
after months had zone by, and the stream
of dreary disputation continued, the editor
could bear it no longer. He indited, per-
haps, the shortest leader that ever was
written; but that leader told tho whole
story of his woes. 1t consisted only of
four words, and those words were, Damn
the Gorham Case" The effect on the pub
lie was wonderful. The paper sold like
wlldhre, and its circulation was permanent
ly increased by at least 20 per cent.
The lnjudiclouS use of metaphors and
idioms Is perhaps the greatest stumbling
block of the native writer. He has learned
q humble of expressions by rote, and is
not content unless he is always dragging
them into his writings whether the occa-
sion warrants it or not. For example, one
paper. in referring to the death of Il dis
tinguished Englishman who had taken
great interest in Indian affairs. expressed
u hore that the Almighty would pour his
mantle" on some other member of parlia-
mont. Another journal in dealing with
some temporary disturbance Of the politi-
cal horizon In Europe, thus commented
on itH wv cannot from a distance realize
the intensity of the crisis; but i. is certain
that many crowned heads must be tremb-
ling in their Shoes Ignorance of the
dual meaning attached to some words
also, at times, produces ludictous result s.
During the Franco-Chinese war news ca me
that the Shanghai chamber of commerce
had appealed to the British government to
prevent the blocking of the Woosung bar
by the Chinese-the bar, of course, being
the OafproI harrIar AZ tha mouth of tho
Woosung river. A native editor entertain
ing strong views of the oppressive charac-
ter of British policy in the east, immedi-
ately jumped to the conclusion that a ne
farlous attempt was on foot against the
liberties of the Acknowledged celestial, and
thus a~nimadverted on the intelligence:
"Woosune, we suppose. is a Chinese town.
and to prevent the oyercrowdlng of the
local bar by Chinese lawyers is a monstrous
PROPOSAL
tive reporter: "Mr. Campbell. the Loco
superintendent. stood forward with his
sta frame in front of the horrid fire.
and his commanding tone of angelic voice
mingled with bis W example, to save the
properties and the lives of the Door crea-
lures, inspired awe, respect, and venera-
ton to the silent bystanders, and drew
them up like Roman phalanx to assist him
in the deeds. But this was not all. He
ordered his shop-coolies to hasten to the
wells and in want of water, then to the
only tank. about a quarter mile distant.
and III an instant water was on hands end.
Messrs. Hartley. Nixon, Dixon, aud the
Rev. Dowding, with their lives at frequent
stake, stood OF the burning huts amid
constant boomiugs and loosenod away the
blazing roofs with mighty strength and
Herculean labor that astound the natives to
behold from afar. They were also simui-
taneously busy to pump water to the tops
of houses with extraordinary agility and
bravity that make our hair to stand Oh end.
and our senses on their standstill."
from central Europe, with all that comfort
that is attached to railway travelling in
Russia.
No bahoo ever turned out a more deli
cious mixture of queer English and Orien-
tai imagery than this: ''Respectfully
Sheweth. That your honor's servant is
poor man in agricultural behavior, and
much depends Oh season for the staff of
life, therefore he prays that you will favor
upon him, and take him into your sanity
service. that he may have some perma-
nently labor for the support of his soul
and his family; whereof he falls upon
his ~fanily's Bonded knees, and ilnplores
to you OF this mercliui consideration to Il
damnable miserable, like your honor'5
unfortunate petitioner. That our lord
ships honor's servant was too much poorly
during the last rains and was resuscitnted
by much medicine which made magniii-
cent excavations in the Golfers of your
honorable servant, whose means arc cir
cumclsed by his large family, consisting of
tive female women, and three masculine,
the last of which are still taking milk from
mothers chest, and are dsmnably noisefui
through pulmonary catastrophe in their
interior abdomen. Besides the above
named, an additional bit tn is. through
grace of God, very shortly occurring to my
beloved wife of bosom. y 81 = That your
honor's dainnable servant was officiating
in several capacities during past genera
tons, but has become too much old for
espouslng hard labor in this time of his
bodily life; but was not drunkard, nor
thief, nor swindler. nor amy of these kind,
but was always pious. a~tiectlonato to his
numerous family consisting of the aforc-
sald five female women and throo males,
the last Of whom are still milking the pm
rental mother. That your generous honor's
lordshlp7s servant was entrenting To the
for employment III municipality
to remove filth, ETC., but was not granted
tho petitioner. Therefore your generous
Will give to me some easy work, i'll
the - department, or something of this
sort. For which act Of kindness your noble
lord6hip's poor servant will, az in duty
pray for your longevity. | have the
honor to be, sir. your most obsdieut ser
want, -, candidate
There il such m amusing assumptiono of
satisfaction III the following that IL
also deserves to DO quoted: "Moat ro-
specially showeth-Ihat your petitioner
beng given to understand TINT your honor