The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1891-03-19
THE WOES OF ACABBY.r
Innumerable Hardships Are His to
Bear.
He Il Subjected Alike to Dissgrseabls
People and Indictment Weather
and Is Poorly Paid for
His Services.

"Talk about policeman's lot being
an unhappy one,'" said a veteran hack
driver the other evening to New York
Herald man, well, you can lay large,
gloomy and peculiar wagers that
/ will swap lots with any police
man on the east or west side--or,
for that matter, with any one Of
the squad in the toughest district in
the city. guess you don't know what
we drivers have to put up with, or the
great difference in the kind of parties
we have to drive. Why, before now
have had parties take me at the Astor
house and give me an order to drive them
to Fifty-ninth street, and when / would
get out at the address given me would
climb off the box to open the door for
my passenger and collect my fare,
when, 10! presto, change! the hack
would be empty. The Lord knows
where my freight got out, but most
probably somewhere between Twenty
third and Twenty-fourth streets. I
don't see how they do it so quietly, for
it makes some noise to open hack
door and takes some practice to jump
out safely. But they do it somehow,
and suppose it is partly due to our
getting tired md sleepy with our days
work.
Then, sometimes run across hard
crowd, and when try to collect at the
end of the route they give me the
laugh and know that if I insist
will only get half killed. Policemen
are never near, either. Oh, l don't
blame them, for if / was one would
hide, too.
Another thing that troubles driver
awfully is waiting-waiting perhaps in
pouring rain-for man never went
into o house yet without saying that
he would be out in few minutes. And
you never can tell when they will come,
either. If they would only say how
long in the first place, it would DO
easier, for then you could drive of to
some convenient spot, or else curl up
and go to sleep quietly inside, in case
the gentleman didn't give you cigar
to comfort you. And, speaking of
cigars, it is astonishing how few fees
drivers get. A man will fee his waiter,
his barber, his porter, his chambermaid
or any people in such employment, but
he seldom thinks of offering the driver
anything but cigar or a drink. Yet a
driver has q hard time, and his wages
are not large, either, to say nothing Of
the responsibility resting on him in
the way Of careful driving, finding the
way, etc.
''Still, l have known people to give
me money occasionally, and in this line
/ think actors are more generous than
others. There is one lady in particular
the wife Of star actor-who never
fails to give me at least fifty cents over
and above the fare have to turn In to
tho boss. never enjoy shopping ex-
'eept when I 60 with her.
Speaking Of ladies, I suppose they
ere worse than any body else At keeping
you waiting. The trouble with them g
that they get Is tar as the door OF
house and there they stand Why. I
have jumped up and down of my box
dozen times just because every Huns
ny farS opened tho house door she
would close it again and continue her
conversation. OF course It fooled mo,
rs wanted 70 be ready to open tho car
iiage door for her.
~Thss&er parties and parties who
wanA 10 b taken 70 the stations are
pretty coed jobs, as the distances are
a1mOst always short and direct and
tihoes Ars generally several in the party
Another thing driver has TO do Il 70
use judgment rs to how he drives, 40
eording 70 tho party inside and the 90
oas30n. Often have I had young fol-
low prs@ afty essts Into my hand whea
would b driving him homo from the
shes*es with his girl and whisper:
Drive allow - you can. please, and 60 .
long way Well. sir, perhaps those same
people would take me again q year or
two afterwsrd. and l could tell they
weys married. because the fellow would
put her in tho carriage and shut tho
door, saying: Good night, dear; will
be homo soon. just want to look in at
the Hoffman house; business engage
ment Man takes an early train; be up
IN half ~ hour
'Whsn you are driving swells home
from the thsator with their wives ycu
want to drive fast, You know, SO that
they can got back TO their clubs at de-
cent hour. Everyone knows that you
want TO 90 slow at funerals and fast to
trains, but for the little fine details 4
driver has got to have Judgment.
''What's that? Well, thank you, sir,
don't caro- if do. Very much obliged.
Good night, sir, and please don't men
tiOn my name"
Could Not See Beyond RAs Nose.
Volkhovsky. Russian exile, while
lecturing st Hampstead, Eng, related