davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-03-05
P1TTsBURG. THURSDAY. MAR. s, 1881
ABATING THE SMOKE NUISANCE.

If there have been some very stupid bills
introduced at Harrisburg this year-such,
for instance, as the proposal to tax elevators
it is due to note that there is occasionally
highly commendable one. To the latter
lass belongs the proposed act enabling
Councils to make provision against smoke
in cities If the smoke nuisance were un-
abatable utterly, there would be nothing to
do but put up with 1t. There are, however,
various devices efecting a partial consump-
ton of the carbon which otherwise would
pass away as smoke, and consequent rela-
tive clearness of the atmosphere. Some of
these are at present in successful use in
Pittsburg-the saving of fuel soon making
up for their cost.
Only one possible objection could lie
against such law, 1. can attempt might
be made to establish exclusive use for some
special monopolistic device by authority
from Councils. But as there are many de-
vices in the market-all of them of more or
less worth-there need be no excuse for a
monopoly. The law in itself, therefore,
would be good one. Ii concerns the pub
lic comfort and contemplates no outlay on
the part of coal users that would not be
reeouped to them in the more economical
results from their furnaces, not to talk
the mitigation OF the smoke nuisance.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-03-05
A GREAT WORLDS FAIR SCHEME

The Confederate veterans of Mississippi
nave plan for grand reunion at Chicago,
during the Worlds Fair, of all the soldiers
VINO ught on both sidesin the late Rebellion.
According to this plan, the State of Illinois
is to build grand blue and gray pavilion,
where all war relics are to be stored during
the reunion, which is to last for thirty days.
The Government is TO furnish tents and
raiions TO the veterans, while each State il
10 furnish transportation for its own quota.
All this is to show foreign visitors that the
old Union and Confederate veterans are
united under the flag of one country, and
that any former differences are as if they had
not existed.
AT first glance the plan looks like per-
fectly proper and quite feasible one, but
continued scrutiny will disclose several
points of objection. The State of Illinoi:
will likely raise decided objections to build.
ing pavilion for the veterans, as. judging
from reports, she will hav. enough to do in
making appropriations actually necessary
for her own display. In fact, Chicago. which
in Worlds Fair matters represents the
State, seems to have an idea that the provis.
ion Of a site is about the extent of her abili-
ties. As to The Government furnishing
tents and rations to the veterans, doubt as
70 the validity of any claim that the Con-
federates NAV think they have on Uncle
Sam will arise. The willingness of each
State to furnish transportation for its quota
Of veterans may also be questioned. The
G. a. f., as a peaceful organi zation, has
never vet asked either State or nation to fur.
nish transportation to encampments, and il
rot likely 10 commence now.
The bcs; evidence to the stranger within
our gates that the country is at peace and
mated under the flag will be to see the &C.
v:ics OF commerce and industry, which
caul.i u1i rxist otherwise. II our Southern
friends additionally will be good enough to SO
conduct iheirelectionS next fall as to give nc
cause for accusation Of bulldozing or cheat.
lug the colored vote; the spectacle of white
winged Peace spreading its wings con-
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-03-05
THE IMPORTANT WHARF QUESTION.

Between using the Allegheny wharf Tor
such reasonable and innocuous purposes as
accommodating an overflow Of wagons from
the Diamond market on the one hand, and
upon the other leaving the wharf open to be
granted away by Councils at some future
date in such a manner as to destroy its use
fulness for purposes of water traffic, there is
such an eminent distinction that il is ex-
tremelv difficult to see how any controversy
is possible.
Mr. Finn says that he offered the coal
and river men to insert any amendment they
wished, to provide fully against the sinister
purposes which they allege lie behind the
act. This is well so far as it goes; but it
strikes us that it does not go lar enough.
Since no such amendment was volunteered
It is Mr.. Films own duty to see that it is
inserted; aud if he fails, the Legislature
should clearly supply the omission.
There does not seem to be at Harrisburg
proper estimate either OF the present or
future importance of water traffic to Pitts
burg There is too much of disposition to
estimate the value OF PIttsburg's wharfage
lacllltleS on Lnelr present dDlllIV 10 produce
money FOR the City Treasury. That may be
4 strictly official view, but it is the dullest
view possible and almost totally foreign to
tde question.
if as is claimed, the city can use the
wharf to advantage as supplemental
market, without interfering with its proper
functions as place of accommodation for
water traffic, let the privilege be granted.
But it is of heap more importance to see
that the gift carries no implication of power
20 Councils in the future to block up the
wharf entirely or utterly destroy its future
usefulness for water traffic. The day is
coming when the convenient and free use of
the Monongahela and Allegheny rivers will
he the most advantageous and important item
il the city's list of available assets. 1t may
not be exactly tomorrow or the next day
but the day will come.
The bill should be carefully and clearly
amended to give no more than is intended,
and to prevent what the objectors ailege
may be conveyed by implication.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-03-05
PRIyILEGED CLASSES.

The proposition embodied in a bill which
was before the Congress which adjourned
yesterday, to authorize certain number OF
appointments to West Point every year from
among the sons OF army officers draws out a
sharp speech from Mr.. Dunnell, of Mime
sofa, in opposition. The New York Sun,
approving his declaration that none of the
inhabitants of this country should enjov
any hereditary advantages~under the law,
gives utterance to the following true words.
"The tendencies to aristocratical institu-
tions and to the establishment of privileged
classes are much too strong already. They
insinuate themselves everywhere and under
almost every pretext."
This is true. How far some people have
drifted from the comprehension of republi-
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-03-05
THE LIVER AND SPELLING.
A Theory That That Important Organ May
Affect Orthography.

Theory That That Important organ may
Affect Orthography.
New York Tribune.I
A man who prides himself on spelling cor
rectly as a usual thing confessed the other day
that at times he went all to pieces on his
spelling. II haven't just decided how to ac-
count for it." he explained. Il think. how
ever that 1t must be my liver. 1 fancy that
spell by memory and what 1 call harmony. 1
have an excellent memory and can recall how
the word ought to look when it is written out
Then when see a word mIsspeiled it Jars on
me. That's what 1 call spelling by harmony.
When q written word shocks my nerves know
that it is misspelled but when my liver is out
of order everything shocks them 80 that only
my memory can serve me. 1 frequently find,
though. that under these circumstances my
memory is treacherous. I recall a case which
puzzled me the other day. was writing cham
payne and spelled it champaign Once the
letters were in ink saw that it was wrong.
scratched out the word and rewrote it, spelling
it champagne That did not look Just right
and for second was tempted to scratch off
the final "e." My memory served me at this
point. for recalled having seen the word
printed in newspaper that morning and it
stood before me in flaming letters. The point
which wish to make Is that this word never
before gave me any trouble. Don't you think.
therefore, that it's the liverT'
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-03-05
AMERICANS IN PARIS.
Napoleon III. Made Duke Apologize to .
Yankee Student.

Napoleon III. Made Duke Apologize to =
Yankee Student.
New York World.i ,.--..
"His years of study In Paris and Berlin form
one of the most enjoyable periods in the career
Of an American professional man." said one of
our most famous surgeons "They did at least
in my case. When was IN Paris the Ameri
can Minister presented lot of US at the TuiI-
cries We got to the audience chamber a little
late. and the young Duke of Bassano. tre-
mendously handsome young fellow In splendid
court uniform, with gold spoon fastened on
the lapel of his coat, came up tn US with a
naughty air and demanded what we meant by
being so late for his Majesty's audience! His
manner was so insolent that several Of US came
precious near drawing the swords which we
wore with our presentation costume and pink
ing him in the ribs. Afterwards we saw Louis
aud he gave. us special audience. We de-
manded through the Minister an apology from
the Duke de Bassano and got 1t, the Emperor
accompanying it with a letter of regret that
the incident should have occurred The Duke
of Bassano, by the way. was fair-weather
friend of Napoleon's. He accompanied his
master and mistress to their exile in Chisle-
hurst and was devoted to Eugenie. Louis
Napoleon impressed me as q coarse, under
sized, big-nozed. and depraved-looking fellow
He was suffering from skin disease which
made contact with him unpleasant.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-03-05
ENTERTAINING MISCELLANY.


Ways of the Wankondes-How to Pose Be-
fore the Camera-stories of Eueland,s
xv...,. rnd1. a.. .Is,
Ciues-oraoAaugn's Great Strengtn.
In a new book of African adventure l. M
Fotbsrineham tells of a two vaa,s, strupuIe
- - .,a,,. ao.1a,..
WIN Alao s.". "oarfe a.. IN CehtIai Airioa. in
speaklng OF Inc wankonoes ne says: You
could see the people In their element any fore
noon you chose to walk among the bananas
You vould be ereeted on oil sidas with ..Saw-
"a. .S,,;,,, ,a,,;.a -s.-. sIss -.
Anv. usun ou inoi mug nase you oieps
welT POSSIBLY some OF the natives might De
at their toilet. some washing and others shaw
ing Both women and men shave off their eve
brows and mil ont THAR evelashes--a nractice
,vhiat, soos -, .nho 80 aa.
mnion uoes ~. enn@uce sneir apPoai"uoe.
Ihey also snaye the mead. bit OF iron with
a good edge does duty as a razor. In the mat
ter of dress, the men simply wear a brass Ioin
belt made our of brass wira imnor,ed from
p.i,.;a rhs ,,;,, :. ,;,.,a
.,,' Di'sip. ine WIG oh "s arrva, hsae
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-03-05
COMING THEATRICAL EVENTS.


SUSIE HOWARD. IN the we'll tne Waif,
will entertain the patrons Oh Harris Iheater
next week.
THE City Club Vaudeville Company will be
the attraction at Harry Williams Academy.
commencing March9
In response to general request Mr.. Mansfield
will. on SATURDAY. night, present his great
dual creation, "Dr Jekyll and Mr.. Hyde" for
the only time during the present engagement.
ON Monday. March o. the Jefferson. Florence
.con,edv COMPANY will commence an enrape.
,,a,t Of n wsek with SATURDAY. matinee az the
,,unnosne Thearer. The first of ths wsek will
=. elevated 10 a revival of .The R,vaIsn the
later half to a production of Colman,s comedy
n ti1e acts .,Tbe Hair.at-Iaw.n The brilliant
comedy of .sThe Riyals.n as presented by the
I.fforson- -Florence Company would interest
o,,n 'E,o,ish-sneaking auJience ON earth
Ie1srson as Bob acres W. ]. Florence as Sir
rnc;,,, OTrtooer. and Mrs. John Drew as Hrx
WoJnnron make triangle of excellence not TO
be srrnasset-
De
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-03-05
EngIand's Wittiest Judge.

"Our Wittiest Judge" is the title of o paper
in Belgrdvta by Percy Fitzgerald. 1t is a
grouping of the anecdotes and rulings Of the
late Sir W. Maule, the eminent Judicial humor-
ist Here are a few: A smart barmaid was
giving testimony before him against an ill-look-
ing ruffian charged with what is called "ring-
ing the changes" They got into a sort of
wrangle or recrimination, but the prisoner, an
lmpudent fellow, could make nothing of her.
and at last said. "Well. you may 60 away. the
jury won't believe you" Il shan't go for your
letting me CO." was the answer. The Judge,
who had been taking his notes, looked up and
said. MY good girl, you have given your evil
dence very well, and can GO; and remem Der
you have this advantage over the prisoner, that
you can go away, and he can't" The man was
found guilty and sentenced to penal penal, servitude;;
before the time is over" Maule did not hear
and asked the clerk what he had said HE
said," said the clerk with much sOlemnity,
time is over" I'VE shall see," said the Judge.
''Call the next case" To us it seems there is
something exquisitely humorous In this I'VE
shall see," an acceptance. as it were willing
ness to leave the issue of the prophecy TO be
decided by the event
Another hardened ruffian, when about to be
sentenced, broke out with May God strike me
dead if 1 did itr' on which followed long,
solemn pause, the jury wondering and every.
body expecting some expression OF severity or
punishment. At last Maule broke the silence.
with. "As the Almighty has not seen fit to in
terpose." and proceeded to sentence. There
was nothing profane IN this. it was really a re-
bnke. But better version is this: A man tried
for stealing watch was asked had he any wit
nesses. He replied that he had none but his
Maker who knew his innocence" The Judge,
after waiting few moments, addressed the
Jury. Gentlemen, the prisoner is charged
with stealing watch. He calls a witness who
does not appear; on the other hand TWO wit
nesses saw him take the watch"
On another occasion he said, en- passant as 1t
were Zone of these defendants is, it seems, a
minister of religion, of what religion it does
not appear; but to judge by his conduct it can
not be Of any form of Christianity" Here, it;
will be noted, there is no rebuke. he simply
notes that the practice does not correspond
with the standard of precept. The whole is
coldly judicial. yet scathing from its very mod
GRAFTON.
Another of his capital illustrations of the
limits of evidence was the following: If a
man." he said to a jury. "goes into the London
docks sober, without the means of getting
drunk, and comes out of one of the cellars
wherein are million of gallons of wine, very
drunk. think that would be reasonable evil
dence that he had stolen some of the wine in
the cellar. though you could not prove that any
wine was stolen, or any wine missed"
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-03-05
How to Dress for a Photograph.

If you are short and stout don't ask the poor
artist TO make picture of you full length. He
will If you insist. but he knows he is doing a
great wrong thereby. Nothing is so graceful
and pleasing in picture of stout lady as
sitting half length. the figure 50 turned as to
hide the too too stoutness. Again. if you are
slim and angular, do not for an instant forget
that a full-iength figure will make you appear
more slim and angular Then the pretty bust
picture is your only hope and you should in
sist on having none other, says writer in the
Ladies' Home Jou nal. If a gentleman has a
very long neck-no matter how nicely he looks
IN high collar, his picture If taken in such
high affair would look grotesQue., A short neck
and high collar. long neck and low turned
down collar by all means. No loud stripes, no
great checks. no striking figures should be
worn in a photograph. One thing bear in mind
when You visit the studIo-bring along your
home expression. Don't spend two days be-
fore you come to the studio practising poses
and different expressions before your mirror
and, lastly, give the photographer the benefit
of exercising his artistic and professional
ability.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-03-05
BratIlaugh's Muscle.

1t would be almost impossible to make any
one outside this country understand what q
power Bradlaugh was in his day here. To be-
gin with, he was a man OF herculean proper.
tions and gigantic strength, writes London
correspondent. At one of the Hyde Park
meetings during the jingo craze, in 1878. Mr.
Bradlaugh positively saved Auberon Herberr's
life. and felled SIX to the ground. one after an
other, with his strong right arm. On one oc-
casion when lecturing at Oldham he was con-
stantly interrupted by two great hulking fell
lows from colliery. who were both half drunk
Bradlatgh at length warned them to desist,
telling them that on another repetition of the
offense he would personally eject them from
tie hall. They ieered and defied him to do SO.
whereupon re leaped from the platform.
grasped each man by. the scruff Of the neck
and ran them down the central aisle. and then
hurled both of them down the steps and out
side without any aid. He was six feet in
height and splendidly made, though latterly he
got too stout. He had a fine head, broad
forehead and bright eyes, his great defect be-
ing his long, ugly upper lip. His jaw was un.
usually large and powerful; his face was al
ways clean shavep. He was vain man, and IN
the hearing of a friend of mine once declared
that 'his face was as mobile as Iryings,p
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-03-05

birth that the expected offspring of Keoho.
kalole was to be adopted by the High Chiefess
Lfliha, known in Hawaiian history as Madame
Boki. But another High Chiefess, Haaheo
Kahn, learning of this arrangement, de-
termined to Illustrate it and herself adopt the
child. On the eve of the expected birth of the
child, she repaired to the house of the parents.
and waited for the event. which occurred abont
"a. NJ; the 18th of November. 1885. She sue
ceeded in getting the infant away to her house,
Honuakaha, still one of the residences of the
kings Upon hearing of this, Liliha's dsap-
pointment was keenly felt; however, as long as
she lived. she took great interest in the child.
Having, through her husbands instructions,
learned to become an adept in such astrological
art as had been developed among the Ha-
waiians. she drew David Kalakaua's horoscope,
and predicted that he would make his mark IN
the world, saying. "From this child the bones
of our forefathers will have life."
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-03-05
THE LADY AND THE BOBBY.
A Funny Scene and Quick Repartee In st
Louis Street Car.

st. Louis Republic.1
The cars on the Fourth street cable running
east were almost deserted yesterday afternoon
when one with fewer passengers on board than
any that had preceded 1t was passing Lafayette
Park. 1t had almost reached the corner of Mis-.
sissippf avenue when Young lady of attractive
appearance and genuine refinement boarded 1t.
She was evidently young schoolmaam. She
had reached the center of the platform and was
facing the interior Of the car where pleasant
faced police officer of Hibernian extraction
was seated, together with one or two other
passengers. As she was about to step into the
car 1t started with that sudden jerk peculiar to
the Fourth street cable. She was Of course
thrown forward. and in trying to fall into seat
fell into the police officers lap. Everyone in
the car saw just how the accident bad occurred
and there was nearly smile at the young
lady's predicament. She, however, was not the
kind to be overcome by an accident of this
kind. By the time she was on her feet again
she discovered that the lace Of her dress had
become entangled on the brass buttons of the
officers uniform. The officer saw 1t at the same
time, and while trying to disengage it, said:
SMadame. I am attached to you" The young
lady fully appreciated the situation and pertly
answered.: "Sir, the attachment is mutual"
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-03-05
CONTEMPORARY CONCEITs.

p,xtar (fhe taiIorl-Of course those pants
o"Ai 49, - II. A., -, a..,o.. =. -, -
bag at the Knees. ho ~ ~ ~, ~ NeeP mem
smooth Sitting az ~ 80. ~ 49, 1I-e- Ou-o ...
stand up more 'No"' "u-' '1n' VI 'usiHe'' 1Ae
you ln' . ,,. ,. .... - .
nroadSay % morse car.~Ss,o YORK Rscordsr.
a;a -o, III. dooro
he-ihu" ~ ~
didn't pun the ueii. -
she (admirng .ne ,s an,an, -,nr w.
ner nhser - He~i~ 'o
Tork HeTdt1'
A KNOWING GIRL
Che Lrous the world was made to win,
,,o,riss .I. krouya the men.
y1-.oo,h sha rrovs no dIsciplIue:
ro.Ioo' $500, ' ,i,. ,.,orId was made to win.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-03-05
OUR NEW COTTON COMPETITOR.
Russian Planters VIII Try a New Expert
ment in Central Asia


ment in Central Asia
CHICAGO, March l-Edward Goujon. Master
of Horse to the Gar of Russia, is in Chicago
en- route to st. Petersburg. With the approval
of the Gar. he came to this country early last
year and purchased plantation at Shreveport
La, for the purpose of studying the theory aud
practice of cotton raising. He believes that
Central Asia offers great possibilities for
the raising of the cotton plant. and he is now
on his way back to the Russian dominions to
put his knowledge into practice. He and
Prince Dalgorouky already own large planta-
tions in the Aslatic cotton belt, which they will
at once plant in cotton, assisted by some
Louisiana cotton planters as overseers, and
with some negroes, who will be taken there to
teach the natives,
Possessed of the imperial favor and conf
dence, they have the promise that the tariff on
American and Indian cotton will be made pro-
hibitory, and that transportation facilities
between their plantations and the markets, not
only of Russia. but also those of other Eu-
ropean countries. will De afforded. The price
of labor In Central Asia is very low, and NJ.
Goujon believes that, In an open contest, he
can drive out american cotton from European
markets, and yet make an immense profit
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-03-05

can equality appears in the measure re-
ferred to. There is a tendency to the heredi-
tary aristocracy idea among regular army
officers already; but it has one advantage
over some of the other privileged classes
springing into existence. Like the feudal
aristocracy in its earliest and best days, it
recognizes that its only claim to existence Is
in rendering good military service when the
occasion comes. On the other hand we have
privileged class purely the creatures OF
legislation; and which in many respects sets
itself above the law that created 1t.
1t is worth while to remember that the
powers exerted by our corporate classes are
hereditary as well as negotiable; and the
transmission of great corporate estates is
notorious in two or three instances. The
privileges asserted for this class are suffi-
ciently remarkable. Thus it has been
clearly set forth of late years that none but
certain members of this class will per-
mitted to build railroads through the State
of New YORK; and only another corporation
is permitted to build certain new roads in
Pennsylvania. This latter corporation has
practically set forth the fact that it owes
neither allegiance to the Constitution of the
State or obedience to the mandates of the
courts by disregarding both. 1t is the Or
thodox doctrine of New York that the cor
porate class as whole must have legisla-
tion to protect it from the competition which
every drygoods merchant, drayman, canal
boatman or other person in the ordinary
branches of effort must be subject to.
II these things do not show the rise of
species of privilege beside which the hered-
itary features of military gentlemen Is
small matter. the details might be added to
dd intfnitum.