davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Press., 1891-12-31
CURIOUS NOTICES.

The following ambiguous notice was posted up, early in the present century, for the information and guidance of the dwellers on certain property in the county of Kent: sNotices is hereby given that the Marquis of Camden (on account of the backwardness of the harvest will not shoot himself, nor any of his tenants, till the 14th of September.
 A similar notice, as regards ambiguity, once made its appearance near Brent ford. It read s'Ten shilIings reward :--Any person found trespassing on these lands or damaging these fences on conviction will receive the above reward. Dogs poisoned. If the magistrates were at all lenient whereabouts 1t might have be- come a profitable occupation trespassing or breaking down fences.
 An Irishman is responsible for the fol , lowing curious challenge, which was cir culated in Dublin in 1781: "This is to certify that I, Daniel O'Flannaghan, am not the person that was tarred and feath- cred by the Liberty Mob on Tuesday last and am ready to give twenty guineas to any one that will lay. me fifty that am the other man who goes by my name. Witness my hand, the 8Oth day July, Daniel O'Flannaghan." It would be rath- CT difficult, no doubt, to settle matters so as to become possessed of the twenty guineas. Another Irishman is credited with the next announcement: ssRun away from Patrick M'Dallagh. Whereas my wife Mrs. Bridget M'Dallagh, is again walked away with herself, and left me with hel four small children and her poor old blind mother, and nobody else to look after house and home, and hear has taken uI with Tim Guigan, the lame fiddler, the same that was put in the stocks last Easter for stealing Biddy Doody's game cock. This is to give notice that I will not pay for bite or sup on his or her ac ccount to man or mortal, and that shs had better never show the marks of heI ten toes near. my home again. N. B. Tim had better keep out of my sight,"
The Press., 1891-12-31


 Surgery under difficulties was that per- formed by two New York sawbones who were called to operate on woman, and over whom, during the entire operation, the husband stood with 8 loaded gun, and the information that he'd kill lem both If they didn't save the mother and child. Moreover, after the operation had been safely completed, he compelled them to remain awaiting possible later develop gnents till finally he himself fell asleep, and thus allowed them to escape. There Is no intimation that the man was a Iunatic. He was simply one of those intelligent voters who come from abroad and undertake the rule of New York city's affairs without knowing enough to rule Noasoich BatIletin,
The Press., 1891-12-31
A MOTHER LIFE SAVED, AND LINGERING DEATH AvERTED. A LADY GIVEN UP TO DIE
 BY SIX PHYSICIANS
 CURED BY DIR. ROYCE.

The marvellous cures by the wonderful skill Of Dr. Royce are the subject of discussion all over New England, and many patients come a long distance to consult win him and be cured by him. The following remarkable cure tehs but the truth and. adds anOther testimonial to his great power Of heal1ngt Mrs. Eliza M. Wheeler Of Plttsheld, Mass, was taken several years ago which terminated in an aggravated form Of dys- pepsfa and what was supposed to be an 1ncurable chronic diarThea. MT. Wheeler, who was anxious about his wife, employed the best physicians the country affords, all Of whom attended her through period Of several years without any help, Mrs. until she became helpless invalid. During the time she was taken with a terrible form of fe- male disease, inducing great loss of vitality, which also produced alarming attacks Of neu- ralgfa Of the heaft She was given up to die by her physicians and her friends abandoned all hopes, and as MT. Wheeler expressed 1t, ''Were waiting for death to end her sunenngs." In this condition, without hope of relief. she applied to Dr. Royce, and in a short time was entirely cured, and now is as well as ever, and able to attend to her household and suffers no pain. She says she can never be sufficiently fateful to Dr. Royce for saving her life Ms.y Of the worst cases Of dyspepsia, scrofula, Af 4ey and. bladder neuralgia, rheumatism, and in fact all kinds of chronic diseases have been permanently cured by him. Members of the best families in this country are numbered among. Dr.. ROyceS pa- irons, and his success is unparalleled. He treats all forms Of chronic diseases, and all the cures that have been published are genuine. Dr. Royee's off1ce lis now sat thes Hotel Gilmore, consult with him, no matter who may have told you your case was incvrable. Call and consult Dr. Royce. Consultation free, by letter or in person. s. '.r .f'--'it
The Press., 1891-12-31
GEN. GRANTS REQUEST.

Speaking about the Vanderbilts re- minds me of story told me by certain noted newspaper man as he received 1t from the lips of the elder Vanderbilt. It was an account of the occasion when Gen. Grant, in desperation, went alone to MT. Vanderbilt to borrow money to tide over the Grant Ward business.
 Gen. Grant was not business man, says the Cincinnati Commercial Gazette He knew nothing of business methods He was keenly sensitive in money mat ters, and had seen much of poverty and pecuniary trouble. Few people can ever know what 1t cost Gen. Grant in humilia- tion and distress to make the visit to Van derbilt.
 He sent his card to MT. Vanderbilt dur | ing the latter's business hours. When MT. Vanderbilt saw the card he stepped out into the ante-room and there saw Gen. Grant sitting with other people, waiting for an audience in the order in which he had entered. He greeted the general warmly and asked him to step in- to the private office.
 Gen. Grant drew back, saying that there were other persons ahead of him and he would await his turn. MT. Vanderbilt insisted, and Gen. Grant passed into the private offices. He was not there over five minutes.
 MT. Vanderbilt seated himself, but Gen. Grant remained standing, declining to take seat, and holding his soft hat, with military cord, in his hand. Gen. Grant said: 1T have come on g. matter of business, MT. Vanderbilt" "All right" said MT. Vanderbilt. "Is there anything can do for you, general ?" for he suspected the nature of the gener- al visit.
 Said Gen. Grant, with ghost of 6 smile: "I would like to exchange checks with you"
 "Glad to hear It." said MT. Vanderbilt, drawing to him check book and dipping his pen in the ink. How much shall 1t be?"
 Gen. Grant hesitated and looked away and finally answered in a low voice: "One hundred and fifty thousand dollars. !"
 The check was quickly filled out and handed to Gen. Grant. He took 1t, grasped Mir. vanderbilt's hand moment and walked out hurriedly without word
The Press., 1891-12-31

REMARKABLE REsoUE.-Mrs. Michael Cyrtain, Plainfield, H., makes the state. ment that she caught cold, which settled on her lungs; she was treated for month by her family physician, but grew worse. He told her that she was hopeless victim of consumption, and that no smedicinee could cure her. Her druggist suggested Dr. Kings New Discovery for Consump| tion; she bought a bottle, and to her del light found herself benefited from firsl dose. She continued it's use, and afte1 taking ten bottles found herself sound and we'll, now does her own houseWorkI and is as we'll as she ever was. Free trial bottles of this Great Discovery at Taft'l Drug Store, large bottles soc. and $1.
The Press., 1891-12-31

Miles Nerve and Liver Pills act on new principle regulating the liver, stom- ach and bowels teyofsgh ths nerUes. A new discovery. Dr. Miles Pills speedily cure biliousness, bad taste, torpid liver, piles, children Smallest, mildest, surest! 50 Hdoses, 90 Cts. Samples free at w. D. Heald's drug store.
The Press., 1891-12-31

The literature on dress during the last 10 years would form an, imposing collec- tion. Equally curious and imposing also would be the cOllectionfof all the empty bottles of Dr. Bulls Cough Syrup used in the last ten years,
The Press., 1891-12-31

BUCKLEN's ARNIoA SALvE.-The bes salve in the world for cuts, bruises, sores, ulcers, salt rheum, fever sores, letter, chapped hands, chilblains, corns, and all skin eruptions, and positively cures piles, or no pay required. Guaranteed to give perfect satisfaction or money refunded. Price 5Oc per box. Sold by E. K. Taft.
The Press., 1891-12-31
P. D. Q. vs. C. o. D.

The tailor said he'd send my clothes As soon as he could do Them up for me, and sIanrged him To send them p.ed. a.. And so he did; but I,.alas, Must dress as nowyou see, Because, forsooth, by some mistake He sent them 0. o. d. And p. d. q. is but tink- Ling cymbal and a sound Ing brass that is no earthly good When c. o. d. s around.
 -DetTOtt Free Press.
The Press., 1891-12-31

Binie-tI'm going to bring my wife around to call on you tonight
 Witherby- That's right, but do me d favor, old man. Don't let her wear hei new sealskin cloak. Idon't want my wife to see it just now. ,
 Bingo (grimly) )-" Why, that's just what we are coming for.''
The Press., 1891-12-31
Highest all Leavening Report Aug IT, 1889. @!a!:'!l:! Q! Bs,,'sa Bs.isar
 ABSOLUTELY PURE
ABSOLUTELY PURE

The one sure thing about the ill-luck of 13 at table, is the fact that so many fam flies are equipped by only single dozen of everything, knives, forks, spoons, etc.
The Press., 1891-12-31

The annual report of Factory Inspector William s. Simmons shows he has exam ined 435 factories during the year. The employees of these mills number 55 ,922 All the changes and Improvements order ed at former inspections had been fully executed except in few instances where they had been only partially carried out. The whole number of changes ordered were 579 in 242 different establishments. The inspector recommends to manufac- turers further Improvements in ventila- tion, sanitary provisions, fire escapes and protection of employees from accident, making these. comments thereon: It is now recognized. that no man can do his best work unless he is physically con- fortable. Excess of heat or cold, poor light, and more than all bad air, are pos itive hindrances to good work, Of two men,. equally skilled, one in a close, damp or hot room, with g bad light, and the other in dry, sweet and healthful room, with the best light, the man who has the most. comfortable quarters will do the most and the best work in a day." MT. Simmons is. doing most useful work, and working out, in spirit and purpose, the factory laws of the state.
 
 Dispatches from San Francisco report that Admiral Brown has secured the op- tion for the government on a new and powerful lstug, just finished at the Union Iron works. and also on four big Spreck- els steamships for possible use in trans port service. In the meantime cruisers from various directions are slowly work ing their way towards the Chilian coast. While the chances are still greatly against any war with Chilli 1t would nevertheless seem eminently wise for the Chilian gov ernment to hurry up it's investigation of the murder of thesei Baltimore seamen and reach a definite decision whether 1t will defend the crime or apologize for 1t and make reparation.'
 Between two small lakes near Boras, Sweden, strip of land has interrupted traffic, but engineers have overcome the difficulty by constructing ship railway across 1t and building small. steamboat that can run itself across from one lake to the other. The vessel has accommo- dations for sixty persons. have been troubled with catarrhi for ten years and have tried Q number of remedies but found no relief until pur- chased bottle of Ely's Cream Balm. consider it the most reliable preparation for catarrh and ycold in the head. Geo.
 K. CrandaIl, .P.M.,. Quonoohawntaug R. I. 1 Coon AND RELIABLE.--A good and re- liable family medicine is Sulphur Bitters. Every spring, for six years I have been troubled with boils. Since. I began using
 Sulphur Bitters, have not had single one. You can rely on Sulphur Bitters every time. Editor Weekly Nesos.
The Press., 1891-12-31

A flood of thoughts came o'er him, A memory winged in flight To that sweet hour, when feelingly He gave his solemn plight; And did he go as he was bid, Y Responding to love's fiat? Why, certainly, he took her arm And 5s
 Went
 Right By r It..
The Press., 1891-12-31

WILL BE GIVEN AwAY.-Our enterpris- ing druggist, w. D. Heald, who carries the finest stock of drugs, perfumeries, toilet articles, brushes, sponges, etc., is giving away 8 large number of trial bot ties of Dr. Miles celebrated Restorative Nervine. He guarantees 1t to cure head ache, dizziness, nervous prostration, sleep lessness, the i'll effects of spirits, tobacco, coffee, etc. Druggists say it is the great est seller they ever knew, and is univers- ally satisfactory. They also guarantee Dr. Miles New Heart Cure in all cases of nervous or organic heart disease, palpita- tion, pain in side, smothering, etc. Fine free
The Press., 1891-12-31
THE BRUTEl"

As passing by a jew'lry store, Agem she chanced to spy, s And while she gazed upon the,stone She drew her lover nigh. You promised me a diamond,'' She whisperaa on the quiet, "Engagemen some but once, you know, . Dear George, @
 Cd B Buy
 Ttn
The Press., 1891-12-31

I have been troubled with chronic ca tarrh for years. Ely's Cream Balm is the only remedy among the many that have used that affords me relief.-E. W. Will lard, Druggist, Joliett, Ill.
 If there is going to be money lost, the best friend you have in the world would a little rather see you lose it than lose.l himself. S
The Press., 1891-12-31

A GENCY of Holland County Mutual "A Fire Insurance Go. at J. w. CHANDIER'S office at residence, WestfOrd-ay., Stafford Springs
The Press., 1891-12-31

MURDERED.-The body of Julius Baer was found by freighters five miles west of here Tuesday morn, in a terribly mangled condition. His head and face were smashed, so as to be hardly recognized, and numerous wounds were found on his body. MT. Baer was agent for the great bery was undoubtedly the motive, as he was well known to have large sum of money on his person. As we go to press there is no clew to the perpetrators. T Colorado Press
The Press., 1891-12-31

Ihave been troubled with catarrhi for ten years and have tried Q number of remedies, but found no relief until I pur- chased a bottle of Ely's Cream Balm. I K. CrandaIl, PM, Quonochawntaug R. I.
The Press., 1891-12-31

Life: He-"Why are you so sad, dar- ling?
 She-''I was just thinking, dearest, that this was the last evening we eould be together. till tomorrow .a
The Press., 1891-12-31

Coon AND RELIABLE.-A good and re- liable family medicine is Sulphur Bitters. Every spring for six years Il have been troubled with boils. Since | began using Sulphur Bitters, I have not had single
The Press., 1891-12-31

EGts H. HOBBY, Piano Tuner and
 Oe Dealer in Pianos and Organs, Mansneld,
The Press., 1891-12-31

~ HI. KING, Attorney and Counsel pensions. Of1cesover-L Leach's Clothing Store.
The Press., 1891-12-31
BUSINESS DIRECTORY

YKTM. WOBBECKE, Merchant
 w Tailor, Room 1, Warren's Block, Stafford Springs, Conn.
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1891-04-02
THE HOUR-GLASS.


The hour-glass with its glittering sands
That fail In steaiths, slender shower
On convenient bracket stands
While Mabel practices her hour"
The agile sant grains run their race.
And a they make their downward journey,
They serve to register the space
That Mabel gives To scales and "czerny"
IT'S one Of her mammals DEGREES
That all young girls must learn TO play" !;
So Mabel thrums the weary keys
AT least one hour in eyry day.
One half this time with nervous hands
She rouses musical Disaster:
The other half she eyes the sands
And prays that they may hurry faster
Oh. sand that's closely watched Il slow;
A minute counted seems 80 long.
And yet her glance royes to and fro
Between tine hour glass and the song.
While friends pass time with games or books
She feels like one prescribed and baniShed:
Till suddenly She upward looks
And laughs to tnd the hour has vanished
Well. youth has many hours like these
When Phabus rides in laggard car.
When time seems standing still to tease,
And longed for goals are. oh. so far.
Engrossed In de IDS or dreams Away,
We sometimes suddenly awaken
To find that sands have slipped away.
That youth a stealthy fight has taken.
Sweet-but unmusical-yeung flower,
Ipray such fate may not be yours,
May you be conscious Of each hour.
Enjoying II while IL enaures.
So, when sweet youth las passed you by.
You may not look with glances Hurried
Upon the glass and startled cry:
'Alack how fast the sands have hurried -
Harry Il. Smith. III America.
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1891-04-02
American Forest Consumption.

Says lumbcrman: 1.-The signing of
a contract for 600. 600, 900 feet of pine in
Minnesota should serve as reminder
that the fear of American forests giving
ont is far from being an imaginary one.
have been handling lumber by the
10000 feet for two-thirds of lifetime
but the figures in this deal took me by
surprise, and it was some time before
could realize them. The supply of lum-
Der in the north is steadily giving out,
as the figures for Michigan in particular
show. Ten years ago the annual output
or product was just about the size of
of the great Minnesota contract just
signed, for single companies, but the
aggregate totals for 1890 barely reached
these figures. We are lavish and ex-
travagant with our lumber now. but at
the present rate of consumption there
will be precious little left to consume a
quarter of a century hence. -Chicago
Journal
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1891-04-02
Hard to Suit.

People sometimes have good ground
to complain of their grocers. and not
unfrequently the grooSrs have reason to
complain of unjust criticisms on the
part of their customers.
One Saturday evening, when there
was quite crowd of purchasers i'm a
grocery in one of the suburbs of an
Eastern city, ii gentleman came in in a
clustering mood.
See here" he said to the proprietor.
that fancy creamery butter of yours
tastes of the firlin."
Il don't see how thai can be-" an
swered the grocer, for ! keep that but.
ter in glass jars"
We'll" said the customer, sharply,
lit tastes of the glass jar, then!"
Youth Companion.
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1891-04-02
A VALUABLE NECKTiE.
1t Contained Twenty Thousand Dollars 4
Cash

Cash.
His neclStie was worth $4,000 A
plain. black. ordinary-loolling. every
day. four-in-hand, but worth $4,000.
lie was a traveller who had just come in
on the Sante Fe route direct from
Arizona. and he removed his coat and
vest preparatory to cleaning his cindcr
speckled face in the lavatory of a prom
inant Michigan avenue hotel. With the
carelcssness of western man he flung
his coat and vest on contiguous chair,
but his necktie. his four-in-hand he
carefully rolled up in small compass
and thrust deep into his trousers pocket.
This unusual exhibition of caution
excited the curiosity of friend. and
the natural query. ''Wherefore?" de-
veloped most ingenious device.
THAT nccktic is worth just $4,000
plus the cost price of the article itself.
Sabe?'
The smile of incredibly brought the
valuable piece Of black silk to view
again. With his penknife the traveller
open the seam. and unfolding the ripped
portions dazzled the eyes of the skeptic
with ten crisp. clean $1,000 bills. ten
thousand dollars on this end and the
same ante on the other. Beats money
belt all hollow. | was held up by the
James and Younger boys in Blue Clay
cut one time and Jim Younger ran his
hand over my body and felt the money
belt, and handed over just $1,000 But
what thief, or son of thief, would ever
look twice at fifty-cent necktie? They
might corral il if it was red or yellow or
even s!<y-biee, but plain black is too un-
obtrusiye. for those chaps run to high
color. This plaza is better than the por.
Gus plaster scheme, too. Never heard
Of it,
well, next time you travel with more
ready cash than you care to have OBJ
tn nable, step into drug store and buy
two porous plasters Fold your wad
neatly and fat, wrap around it piece
Of oiled silk aud stick plaster over it
and on to the outside of the other plas-
ter. Then slap tins double-deck plaster
on your chest and no ones the wiser.
But the fonr-in-hanl racket's the best"
and the man with the $4,000 necktie
gave it a final twist as he tied it around
his collar, slipped on his vest and coat
and walked out. serene and secure with
twenty $1,000 bills snugly hid away iii
his queer safety-deposi. vault.-Chicago
News.
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1891-04-02
Women at Auction Sales.

Our best friends are the women"
said an auctioneer as he hung out the
red flag in front of fancy and notion
store THE average woman is the most
determined bidder. for when ii woman
will she will The woman who attend
auction sales of any kind are neither
very rich nor very poor. They are from
the comfortable class. The women en-
JOY shopping, and we like to see them
at our sales, for we knew the prices,
and OF course the commissions will be
higher than If their men folks did the
bidding. Some women have Il perfect
mania for attending auction sales. They
will go to u sale in Maiden lane in the
morning and 20 another in the dry
goods districts in the afternoon. They
. invariably display good Judgment in ST.
Letting the newest designs and fashions,
but we have them when it comes to
prices, for | never met woman yet
who would let any man outbid her for
an article she had set her mind upon. +"
N Y. TELEGRAM
The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1891-04-02
EDUCATION IN ARGENTINE.
The Inferior Method of Instruction In
That kepublic.

That Republic.
The apparatus of public instruction
seems to occupy the attention Of the
government in becoming manner,
and doubtless in course of time the cit
liens will be fairly well educated. At
present. as far as my experience goes,
the young Argentines are as ignorant
and badly informed as they are badly
behaved. and that, too, not from want
Of intelligence-thev are even pre-
cociously intelligent-but from lack of
severe and logical training. One is
tempted to conclude that there is
want of discipline and good pedagogic
methods in the schools and colleges,
and one cannot believe that the ex-
treme license allowed to boys of ten
and twelve years of age, such as liberty
to smoke. and to contract premature
habits of vice and immortality. is com
patable with good intellectual train
ing. A more corrupt, rude, unlocked
and irrepressible creature than the
average Argentine boy it would be
difficult to find in any other civilized
country. The girls, too. haveAan air of
eifrontery and liberty Of language
to which the older civilizations of
the world have not accustomed us. The
educational statistics are, however, sat
isfactory, SO far as mere registered re-
suits are concerned. There are two
universities, one at Buenos Ayres and
one at Cordoba, which together counted
g94 students in 1889, and delivered pa
diplomas, including 81 doctors of law,
So doctors of medicine and II civil en-
gineers. In the whole republic there
are Is national colleges, with a teach
ing corps of AGA professors, and an at
tendance, in 1889, of 1850 pupils. In
the capital and the provinces there are
35 normal schools, with IL, 12i pupils of
both sexes, who become professors and
teachers, chiefly for the primary schools.
In Buenos Ayres in 1889 there were 2S5
primary schools, directed by 1,51l teach
ers, and attended by 54,5o9 children. In
the provinces there were a,7I9 primary
schools, with teaching staff Of 4,532,
and an attendance of EOS, 1856. To re-
sumo, the results obtained were 3,O43
primary schools, 6,1O3 teachers, 259, 695
pupils, and Abb primary schoolhouses
+! in the whole republic. OF these school
houses 4s5 are the property of the ma
ton Or of the provinces, and 1,SsS pri-
vate property.-Theodore Child, in Iiar-
per's Magazine.