Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-15
SPARKS OF WIT.

Al you Want man 8 canulQ opinion
of you make him angry and you'll get
it.
When it comes to q question of
society the best is not always tho
cheapest.
Speaking of the man in the moon,
the general impression is that he is
mot In it."
Married people. it is said, live
longer than single ones. 1t seems
longer. any way. to unhappy couples.
There are many people in the world
who laugh all the way home and stop
as soon as they reach their front door.
Women may indeed have a sphere
that is boundless, but she has to stop
when she comes to a barbed- wirc
fence
The rate Of interest that a broker
feels in woman whom he is counting
is liable to depend upon the amount
of her fortune
The most bashful CIR! ever heard of
was the young lady who blushed when
she was asked if she had not been
counting sleep.
The matchmaker is doomed to per-
petual apprenticeship. Even when
he pretends to be in business for him
self he is really serving his time
He-"Maud is very young and in
genuous in her way, isn't she?" She
Yes. Her second childhood rests
very gracefully upon her, doesn't it9"
Poet (reading his latest effusion to
a friend my poem seems to
affect you very greatly-you are weep
ins?' Friend-"No. simply perspir-
ing!''
Teacher-''You think sin is an
adjective. do you? How would you
compare itP'' Smart Positive,
sin; comparative, sinner, speculative,
cynic."
There are men and men, rs there
are sandwiches and sandwiches.
There's nothing in some OF them aud
in others the more there is so much
the worse.
Isabel-"What an awfnlly shoddy
girl Genevieye Flyaway is! Every
thing about her has the air OF being
marked down." May-"Yes, even
her age"
In the distribution OF vocations it is
strange fact that the man who could
run a newspaper to suit every one is
always in some other business than
journalism.
j Who will venture to say woman is
not Infinitely the superior of man
when 1t comes to that which. in the
vernacular.i is Familiarity termed ''pack-
ing trunk?"
McCorkle Cooking at the individual
leaning against that lamp-posD-
That man has queer name-Trian-
gle" McCrackle-'.It is appropriate,
though. He is ryc-tangled triangle.
Sam Johnsing-"l'se all right now.
Use gwinter get up" Careful Wife
''Eool niggah. Jess you stay in bed
until you has tuck de rest OBJ de medi-
cine in dat bottle what paid dollar
for"
"Where is the doctor and what is he
doings" He's reading over his SER
mon OF the morrow to acquire fluency
in its production" ''Oh. I see! A
kind OF 'practicing. what-he-preaches'
system"
''Ethol-'Of course. papa. I want to
marry him. but you'll have to give mo
Mp. poor dear. won't you?" Papa-
'''Well. my dear. that's true; but then
we'll get rid Of your young man. too.
you know"
II wonder why it is that old violins
are moro valuable than others?" said
Quericle. II don't KNOW" replied
De Kicque. ''unless they have gotten
out OF order SO that nobody can play
on them"
She Hero you are getting home
late again. And there's flush on
your face" He-'Just my luck.
Been waiting for flush all evening.
and it comes too late to realize any,
tnlng on IL
Il say. Bobby" whispered Feather.
ly, Ibid your sister say that she hoped
my trip would do mo good?" Eyes.
she told me last night that II Mr..
Featherly went west she hoped he
would 60 for good"
'On what ground. Mr.. Cautious. do
you propose to break our engage
ment?" "There is no ground. Miss
Bellows; that's the trouble. I had
supposed. whom We became engaged.
you owned u large farm"
Johnny-''Mr. Hankinsou. amt you
shaped just like other men"
Mr.. Hankinson I'll suppose so.
JohrS,y. Why?" Papa says you
amt exactly square and Irene
says you seem to be always round"