The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1891-02-20

H4 I'd hearn tell OF em and I'd
seen 'em, with their broad
IyN brim'd hats and long wastid
% coats; but I'd never cum
into immejit contack with 'em, and I'd
sot 'em down as lackin intelleck, as I'd
never seen 'em to my Show-leastway
if they cum they was disgised in white
peple's close, so didn't know 'em.
But in the Spring of 1S-, l got
swampt in the exterior Of New York
State, one dark and stormy night, when
the winds Blue pityusly, and l was
forced to tie up with the Shakers.
was toilin threw the mud, when in
the dim vister of the futur | obsarved
the CLEANS of a taller candle. Tiein
hornets nest to my off hoss's tail to
kinder encourage him, l soon reached
the place. knocbt at the door, which
it was opened unto me by tall, slick
faced, solum lookin individooal, who
turnd out to be a Elder.
Mr. Shaker" sed |, "you see before
you Babe in the woods, SO to speak,
and he axes shelter of you"
"Yay," sed the Shaker, and he led
the way into the house, another Shaker
bein sent to put my hosses and waggin
under kiver.
A solum female, lookin sumwhat like
last years beanpole stuck into long
meal bag, cum in and axed Inc was /
athurst and did l hunger? to which
urbanely anserd "a few" She went orr
and endevered to open conversashun
with the old man.
Elder, spect?" sed /.
"Yay," he said.
"Helth's good, reckony'
"Yay."
whats the wages Of o Elder, when
he understans his bizness-or do you de-
vote your sarvices gratooitus?"
"Yay."
Stormy night, sir"
"Yay."
''If I may be so bold, kind sir, what's
the price Of that pecooler kind of wesket
You wear, incloodin trimmins?"
"Yayw
pawsd mint, and then, thinkin
I'd be faseshus with him and see how
that would go, l slapt him on the shoul-
der, bust into harty larf, and told him
that as yayer he had no lvin ekal.
He jumped up as if Bilin water had
bin squirted into his ears, groaned,
rolled his eyes up lords the sealin and
sed: you're man of sin!" He then
walkt out.
Just then the female in the meal bag
stuck her he'd into the room and statid
hot &c %oI
traveller, and I followed her into the
next room.
sot down to the table and the female
in the meal bag poured out sum tea.
She sed nothin, and for five minutes the
only live thing in that room was a old
wooden clock, which tickt in subdood
and bashful manner in the corner. This
dethly stiffness made me oneasy, and /
determined to talk to the female or bust
So sez l, Marriage is agin your rules,
bleeve, marm?'
"Yay."
"The sexes liv strickly apart, I spect?"
"Yay."
Its kinder singler," sez l, putin on
my most sweetest look and speakin in a
winnin voice, "that so fair made as
thou never got hitched to some likely
feller."
II don't like men!" she sed, very short.
wall, l dunno" SEES l, "they're a
F.. rayther important part of the popula-
shun."
''Us poor wimin folks would git along
a CRATE deal better if there was no men!"
You'll excoos me, marin, but don't
think that air would work"
I'm afraid of men!" she sed.
That's Unnecessary, marin. You ain t
in no danger. Don't fret yourself on
that pint"
Here we're shot out from the sinful
world. Here all is peas. Here we air
brothers and sisters. No wicked matri-
mony here. Would thou like to be q
Shaker?''
NO." sez I, "it amt my stile."
l had now histed in as big load OF
pervishuns as could carry comfortable,
and, leanin back in my cheer, commenst
pickin my teeth with fork. The female
went out, leavin me all alone with the
clock. hadn't sot thar long before the
Elder poked his he'd in at the door.
You're a man of sin!" he sed, and
groaned and went away.
Directly thar cum in two young Shak-
eresses, as putty and slick lookin gals as
ever met.
They comenst clearin away the dishes,
castin shy glances at me all the time.
got excited. / forgot Betsy Jane in my
rapter, and sez l, my pretty dears, how
air you?'
I'VE air well," they solumly sed.
''Whar's the old man?" sed l, in a soft
voice.
"Of whom dost thow speak-Brother
Uriah"
II mean the gay and festiv cuss who