Weekly graphic. [volume] (Kirksville, Adair Co., Missouri) 1880-1949, 1891-03-27
Mossback Epistolary.

behind bleeding silence and an
aching awe in all cases. The slave
whip of party has been found un-
availing, where the victim happens
to be suffering with candidates
paralysis. In politics, as in love,
"who falls from all he knows of
bliss, cares little into what abyss"
Disappointment is only milder
term for desperation-that ls,
with men of spirit. Lately
neighbor handed me note from
the Multums, reqaestirg me to come
to town immediately, as itsswas i'm
perative that a talk be had with
me. Boarding the lion in his den
was never strong point OF mine
lit l thought he was hungry.
Hal had diplomacy equal to dis
cretion, half the steamboats, III the
United States might have been
named the Solomon Mossback. l
might even have gone David B.
Hill one better, and held three
offices at time. But it is weak
mess in the undiscovered states
man to gaze on the Utopia of the
might have been. The might
have been is poetical illusion-a
rainbow born of tears. Cleveland
might have been a tutelary saint,
and l might have been President
only we are not. The request
of the Muitums, which in honest
truth, had more the nature of a
command, brought me great per-
plexity. | desired to meet the
worthless, yet l feared the issue.
Like most model husbands who
chance to get puzzled, L consult
10y wife, when no one else is
handy.
"What would you advise me to
do, Sally Amp" asked, after
reading aloud the communication.
The question was ill-timed. Mrs.
Mossback had washed that day,
and was rather in bad temper.
l 81 would advise you Solomon,
: to 90 to work, and leave politics to
men whose wives are not the only
visible assets. | am tired of hunt
:; ing carpets to weave while you are
4 hunting for Office, Mr.. Mossback. [
: have waited for reform until pa
i, tience has become folly. Only
last Sunday that nasty conceited
Smith boy asked our Adoniram if
n he knew the Rip Van Winkle of
Elm Narrows. DO you know him,
y Solomon? Why, you are verit-
S able Rip, in everything except
b sense enough to let politics alone.
| would advise you to 60 out and
look for some work, Mr. Mossback,
# and stay away from town. But go
j. to town if you know best. [ dream
r ed last night you were in Jail, any
how"
!, Mrs. Mossback is dead shot at
n the future when she is asleep, SO
the closing remark WAS not without
70 its effect. [ determined to address
the Multums from a safe distance,
- by means of pen and ink. [ con-
l. fess | was snob enough to address
e directly the Rothchild of the CON-
e bination. After infinite worry
and pains, the following was pro.
duced and sent;
- "Great Jupiter of the Junto and
Il Midas of the Multumsl Mendicant
Mossback halls you from afar. Re.
peated disappointments and be.
trayals have made him wary. While
y retaining full confidence in human
st nature, he has learned to look with
d deep distrust upon the leaders OF
-" his party. Believing Don Quixote
g is none the better for having beer
,' written in prison, and concluding
n his Own letters could gain nothing
ot by his confinement in Jail he de,
clines to place himself wholly al
the mercy of those who haye nc
e political conscience. He appre-
q hends that the Symposium society
"a of your town, of which he believes
:, you are member, presumipg up
Il on his moral weakness, has IN
J. trigued to deprive him of the lib
IS erty of person and his freedom of
s speech. He desires to say that
when he seeks a compotator he
goes among his friends. He
IS promises that his boots shall be
innocent of the soil of Lancaster
for some time. If truce or treaty
J, be in contemplation, he will meet
o the Multums either at his humble
r home or on neutral ground. He
would not object to Glenwood, as
it is neither incorporated nor
bourbonized
"Mendicant Mossback's lett ers
T Will continue, unless a cash con-
: sideration be entered as a protest.
q He must have money or revenge.
y Once, great Midas, when he was
about to turn Greenbacker and
run for sheriff, you weaned him
from his purpose by falthless
y promises and false representa-
" tions. Yet he might have been
:. elected. He mentions this only
# to prove it not forgotten. He
numbers his political defeats by
the furrnXs ON his hrnw. and his