St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1891-03-28


Managing Editor-See here, Sport, want
you to go down to Billfinger's tonight and do
the scrap between Fakey Fake and Ranky
Rank
Sporting Editor-Yesh, (hic) shur. Ally
right (hlc). Shay, how long VIII that (hic)
give me to get into condishun?
Managing Editor-Three hours, and you
would better go into training at once.
Ex-senator Blair. it is announced, will sail
for China on April 1, but as this will be All
Fools day. it is feared that it may, unhap-
PLY, prove untrue.
An oil tank vessel has brought 100000 gall
Ions of molasses to Philadelphia. We can
not now throw all the blame on the retail
grocer if our new maple sugar tastes Of kero-
sene oil.
In times of peace prepare for a baking
powder war;
Like an oak by Jove's bolt riven,
Lies our worthy EXCELLENCE;
Stricken by pan-roast given
By the moribund P. p.
Timothy Healy is quite likely to lose his
Sight-until he can secure a new pair of eye
glasses.
Why fill store with goods, and then keep
dark about it? 1t costs money every day and
every hour to carry stock of goods. Let
the public know what YOU have to SELL In
terest the people-attract them-do not allow
them to forget you OF your crowded shelves
Turn on the lights, especially the brilliant
steady and far-reaching light of advertising
Cincinnati Commercial Gazette.
Morris w. Moorehouse, of Bridgeport,
Conn, took double-barreled shotgun to bed
with him. and shot himself fatally. In this
connection it is well to call attention to the
fact that Mr.. Moorehouse knew it was loaded.
The published statement that Secretary
Blaine has slight touch of the gout'' is,
indeed touching.
AS goes Gen. Palmer so goes the mayoralty
election in Chicago.
First Boston 1outh-Wen, Cholly, how did
you enjoy yourself out West?
Second Boston Youth-Beastly. Why, the
natives actually insulted me.
F. B. Y.-How so?
S. B. Y.-Used beans for poker chips.
Slightly resigned but still in the ring
Senator Edmunds.
The motto of Henry Watterson appears to
be: IF you have any doubt concerning the
safe transmission of your letters through the
mails publish them in the morning papers. "
One of the present st. Paul sensations
aside from the Merriam-W heelock mills a
corner in Easter eggs But it is thus that
history repeats itself; there is invariably a
corner in Easter eggs when the Minnesota
state Legislature is in session.
The statement that Barnum is trying to buy
Nelson. the rapid equine. for Sl50,OOO, to
star him with his circus, indicates that if
he should try dollar or two harder he
might secure him. Like the average legis-
lator, every race horse has his price.
Ex-senator Blair is going to China. AS a
narcotic John will find him several laps
ahead of dozen pipes of opium.
Senator Donnely finds occasion to say that
NAAN AOAiN~A ANSS 40 INV NOtoC HS"SP"PSt
that has existed since God made the world "
This candid avowal at once removes the Da-
kota senator from the long list of eminent
agnostics. 1t also proves that he can employ
language straight from the shoulder. Ian
guage that requires the aid of no cryptogram
to translate. The statement is intelligi
bic. Ii is at once terse, incisive and denun-
catory. 1t is SO plain that he who runs may
read; and, as Mr.. Donnelly has the Pioneer
Press on the run, it is safe to assume that it
ran &c hastily