The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1891-07-30
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS.

IT S mlgnUy cOWdrQlY man VINO |
hasn't the courage to advise another
with the toothache to have it yanked
Out.--Boston Transcript.
The day is at hand when it will be
an open question as to which is taking
the other to the circus, Johnny or his
father.-Wa Washington Post.
He is very dear friend of yours,
isn't hep" Yes, borrows ten dollars
regularly every week. brakes Maga-
zine.
-"Debitn' is word probably in
vented by some disappointed creditor
with cold in his head, who meant to
say something else.-Puck.
-''Mrs. Small, this coffee won't set
tie, !" complained McWatty to his board
ing-house keeper ''Then it is in good
company, Mr.. McWatty," replied Mrs.
Small frigidly.
-"Grayfellow seems to be greatly
changed - ''How so?' Formerly
when l saw him out walking he was al
ways in the company of some young
woman; now he is always alone" 80,
he is married now, you khow."-N. Y.
Press. ..E
Making Him Ashamed.-'If-ify you
only knew what the bill was for"
sobbed the young wife, ''you would b-be
ashamed to scold so about it." ''What
was it for?" demanded John. oMy
birthday present for you, said the lit
tie wife, Y. Sun.
-Wife-''Do you suppose the Creator
made woman last on the principle the
best comes last?" Husband-"Of course
not. He did it because he didn't want
everything talked about and pulled to
pieces and made over. Washington
Star.
I'm the spring a man always thinks
it is cheaper to buy lawn-mower and
trim all his lawns himself. In the heat
of July he always knows it is cheaper
to hire laborer to do the job-but he
can't persuade his wife.-Somerville
Journal.
"A Good Rule.-Rosenberg Senior
Simon, my poy, now that are going
into pizness for yourself let me gif you
Won good rule to follow" Rosenberg
Junior we'll, fader" Senior.-''It's
dis: If your customers don't see vat
dey want, make dem want vat dey see"
Yankee Blade.
Women are free in their gifts of love,
OF presents of different kind,
But does giving her husband a piece Of it
show tE
She's rich, too, in presence of mind?
Philadelphia Times.
Some Musical instruments. Rob
1.-The most wonderful organ | ever saw
was the property of private gentle
man. 1t had nearly hundred stops. !"
Richard-"The most wonderful organ
ever saw was the property of widow.
1t was her tongue, and it had no stops
at all"
Woman never swears, but when a
man steps on the hem of her dress and
ruins couple of yards of expensive
trimming, the thoughts which pass
through her mind afford the devil as
much amusement as though she had let
out a string of oaths mile and half
1ong.-N. Y Herald.
Ezra said Farmer Begosh to his
son, II want We to go to town to-day"
''Yes, sir" '.You go to the store and
buy me couple of gallons Of milk a
few dozen eggs, six loaves of bread, and
| put an advertisement in the newspaper
tellin' people we kin give 'em country
| board. Washington Post.
in the Wardrobe. "My hat, please?''
"Here, SIR" ''That isn't mine" ''Ex.
| cuse me- Here it is.'' "That isn't it,
either" ''This one then! No? What
kind of hat was it?" "A new one
with white silk lining" ''What! A
/ o1-
pardon, but here all the new hats al
ways go away before eight ~ Fliegende
Blatter.