The Logan County banner. [volume] (Logan, W. Va.) 1889-1903, 1891-03-12

1T takes two to gossip The man
who listens can threw no blame on the
man who tells. - tchison Globe.
The best way to pack trunk y e
sit In an easy chair and watch your wife
do II ~ Richmond Recorder.
Its somewhat remarkable how 30
many crooked mon get into straigh sened
circumstances. - Washington Fosk
Peasant TO his son1 'Say, Hans,
how long will you have 70 study before
you can wear glasses" Fliegendc Rlat-
tor.
--Scribbler-s II have just lots Of fun
writing my Jokes" Friend Thcn that
explains ii wondered where the fun
came 49, Detroit Free Press.
Isl know what the nights OF labor
are, said the mother Of six boys rs she
at dewn to repair the pile Of trousers
and Jackets
--Watts-r"How Is old man Giiflllan2
Is he out Of danger yet?e Doctor Bowless
II don't know. He died this morning.
indianapolis Journal.
when person gets into hot water
you may be sure that he has furnished
his share Of the fuel TO heat the same.
~ Boston Transcripts.
An agnostic is man who does not
know any thing, and glories In the fact.
Tho atheist Is smart man who re-s
joices In making fool Of himself-
Boston Traveller.
Not Wholly Bad. rs your son one
Of those noisy, dissipated college boysq"
Not exactly. He Is what yon Might
call the cub that cheers, but not In.
ebriates. IN. Y. Sun.
There are two things needed In
these days: First for rich mon TO fi1d
ont how poor men live, and second for
poor men to know how rich men work.
Edward Atkinson.
-"well," said Brown to his newly
married friend, $50 your wife docs the
cooking ] wonder you arc alive to tell
the tale eyes, replied the other,
"bnt am alive ffyo and kicking =,
lid Bits.
Why Is II that 1t is so much easier
for other people to say mean things
about man than ii Is to make pleas
ant comment? You YOURSELF you know.
never say any thing but pleasant things
about anybody -Somerville journal.
Mr.. Quilp says that the popular
game known as "Tiddledywinks" must
! have been invented as safe alternative
for persons unable to stand the mental
strain Of prolonged indulgence in the
idiots Delight. =" Buffalo Commercial.
The Almanac Said So Doctor
GLOW do you know that your kidneys
are deranged, and you have consump-
ton and heart disease?' Patient Be-
cause I've been reading patent medi-
cine almanac. Yankee Blade
= Dapper-.sWhat is the greatest lie,
Snapper, that ever impressed itself on
your experience?" Snapper Well by
all odds, the worst lie ever heard was
the one your quartet psrpetrated last
night whom they came around TO the
house and sang There's Music In tho
Air w. Boston Courier.
-Jenks-"Shall you go to the opera
this season as usual, Miss Helen?''
Helen-"We don't know yet Ethel and
: / want to go very much, but cur brother
George is on hiskcollege football team.
and we can't tellaget whether we shall
be In mourning this year or not - ar-
per,s Weekly.
s His IDEAS Not Wanted. Great Ed
tor-"You want to be journalist, Mr..
Deake? What are your qualifcations?''
Mr.. Deake with pardonable pride) ST
was graduated from Harvard, and took
postgraduate course at Yale Great
Editor-"Um. yes; both good colleges,
athletically; you must have a good pair
Of legsl Suppose you start in collecting
hicvcla nnfaa far r,,r Cox. ., a. ficut adf-