The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1891-03-04
The Lords Way.

IL SGCDS marc, anu bitterly nara, 10
sit here with my hands folded, my feet
useless, and wait in silence till the end.
| have prayed so earnestly all my life
that the Lord would let me drop in the
harness at the end, not keep me wait
ing in helpless letters till the summons
came in my old age; but my prayers
have not been answered. / am crippled
with rheumatism at the age of seventy,
and feebly old.
Old, did say? why it seems but yes
terday that father brought me home to
the old farm a bride; and here as l
think it over, it is fifty years agol
Fifty years together, and now L am
alone!
My life has been a hard one, aye,
very hard one, from my girlhood up,
with the endless round of toll, and as
the years have gone by without those
let-ups Herman's wife is always getting,
work ceased to be the drudgery it was
to me, and became my real life after
ALL
Yes, Pm old; there can't be any
doubt about that, for my hair is white,
and my face is wrinkled, and has lost
the bloom father loved to see. God
bless dear father; it's one of my mer-
cies now that he amt here to see me
helpless in this way, for he was so
proud of my strength, and my nimble
fingers, and the clipper way | used to
step around. It's small mercy to
think of, but it's mercy for all that.
thought my heart was broken when
father went; and it was awful missing
him from my de at every turn, when
baA nj p,h thA hin Iar
that June day fifty years ago, when
Parson Roberts made us one. 1t was
long time before | could get used to
putting out my hand, as | sat by the
sitting-room fire alone, and saying,
Father" and then not have him
take my hand in his, as of old and say,
"What is it. mother? Are you think
ing of little Willie tonight" But the
Lord knew what he was about wht n he
led father away from me, and-and
have learned to get used to his way,
but | amt got over missing of father
yet, for all that.
dinn't realize was so old and help
less, it seems to me, till found | was
giving up one duty after another be-
cause it was too much for my strength;
and the rheumatism got hold of me,
and Herman's wife began to take my
place in the house, and, little by little,
| was set aside, and the old west cham
Der became my world. Herman's wife
is good to me, that's fact; but some
times | do wish she'd leave the darning
of the stockings to me, the cleaning of
the silver or the sewing on of the but
tons; but it seems it wasn't best, for
Ida said l shouldn't do any of her work
while she had so many servants to do it
for her-besides that, | wasn't strong
enough.
So sit here day after day looking
out my southwest window and irving
to say: "Oh, Lord, Thy will be DONE"
but | can't get out anything but " Oh,
Lord-Oh, Lord" and it's nothing but
a reproach in my voice after all. My
Bible lies over. there open on the pretty
stand Del covered so nicely for me,
and my spectacles atop of it, but it
seems like rebuke to me in my rebel
ion, and | can't read it.
l amt taken much comfort in any
thing lately, but the rose-bush Jack
brought me month ago; and maybe
that's because its soft, velvety touch
reminds me so much of Willie's little
pink cheek when he was baby that L
kinder banker after it. Jack put the
rose where he thought | could best see
it, but it was in the shadow of the cur
tain; and so every day I've held the
curtain and let the sun shine in upon it.
I've watched it thrive and grow, till l
know every blessed leaf upon it, and |
love it as dearly as if it were alive; |
often feel as though it knew and loved |
me, too, for when the breeze gently |
lifts its head, 1t mods in friendly way |
to me as if it were thanking me for Civ
ing the sunshine to it so carefully every
day.
l get terribly lonely sometimes, for
it's hard, after being so active all my
life, to be set down suddenly helpless
cripple in my old age, of no use to any
body and an added burden besides.
Sometimes l think the Lord has for
gotten me, and left all my prayers un-
answered, but may be it amt so.
lie back with folded hands in the
twilight, struggling with the old rebel
lion. The door is pushed open, and