The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1891-05-16

l. y.
A BREACH or PROMISE.
He sued for her hand-did the dude
In a moment exceedingly rash;
Aud he in turn is being sued,
And she's after ten thousand in cash
ACCEPTING THE COMPLIMENT.
"lour rich aunt has grand air about
her"
Yep. Pm the heir"
RECIPROCITY.
Scrawley-Drcadful bore that fellow,
Pennies. DO you know that he kept me
on street corner for half an hour this
cold morning talking about his new play
which he has just finished!
Scribblerus-And how did you finally
get rid of him?
Scrawley-I began to tell him about
my new poem, and he left at once
lAmerica
THE MEAGRE DIET MADE HIM THIN.
Borrowit-That's rather swell board
ing house you are stopping at, Carleton.
Gazzieton-Why, yes. tried a cheap
r one, but / couldn't afford it. l fell
away so that l mad to buy new suit in
aHweeks.-l Iiarpcr's Bazaar.
INDIAN TROUBLES.
General Killem Irregular army)-What's
become of all those hostile Indians who
were expected to make an attack here?
Mr.. Starvcm Qndian Agent)-I-I gave
EN- something to eat, and they went off.
New York Weekly.
LIMITATIONS OF GENIUS.
Book Publisher have looked over
me manuscript which you submitted to
lis. and find a good pot, many we'll
drawn characters, and some picturesque
word painting: but the love-scencs are
cold and stilted. Can't you improve on
them?
Authoress (wearily)-I am afraid not.
Tn married. York Weekly.
HORRIBLE EXPOSURE.
Whats the matter, Chappie, you
look all broke upl"
II am. Chollie. deah boy. I've a
dweaifu cold. Miss Buddc would use
her fan at the cOtillion lahst night, and
got it all, doa't You know, wight on my
chest"
TIE REJECTED LOVER.
T+c proposed, she said no, and he pon-
dercd upon it.
And his brow grew as black as
heaIsc,
And as he departed he called her a
sonnet.
Because she to him was avcrse. Cape
God Item.
NOT TIE RIGHT SORT.
Applicant sec you advertise for a
college graduate to take a position in
your business.
Publisher-Ycs. Are you a graduate?
81 am"
"What place did you hold in the col
hge eleven"
II did not play football. Twas afraid !
Of getting crippled"
"You won't do. 1 want man fer
scok agent. - New York Weekly.
HOW SHE WAS CURED.
; Manie.-Oh, George, / feel so faint !
What is good for fainting-spells, George?
George (excitedly)-Now you've got
met
Mamie-Oh, am so glad to hear you
say so, dear George! feel better al
ready. Puck.
DIDN'T KNOW 1T WAS so FAD.
Biggs-Isnt it sal that poor Iiggs has
lost his mind?
Dggs Awfully, He was absent
minded the last time met him, but l
lldH't fancy it would be chronic
brooklyn Eagle.
A THEORY.
."Why does man always grow loqua-
NOUS when he's drunk"
The spirit moves him to speak"
RED AND BLUE.
In the Stationery Store-First Young
LAdy--Do you always buy two kinds of
paper2
Second Young Lady-Always You
see when write to Charlie use red pa
per; that means love. When l answer
'lm's letters l use blue paper, which
means faithful unto death. See9- Tex
Siftings.
TOTALLY UNLIKE HIM.
ut was beautiful day when had
ny portrait taken" said old Gen. Grow
,er. 81 don't see why we didn't get a
likeness"
You must have obcyed the photo
ssIIapher and looked pleasant" returned
&Ys, q.