davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Durham recorder. [volume] (Durham, N.C.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-25

DIR. G. X NELSON, Of South
Bethlehem, Pa, has accepted
the bishopric of Georgia, sub.
ject TO the canonical consent of
the church,
The Durham recorder. [volume] (Durham, N.C.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-25

THERE are over i2,50O, 900
pupils in the public schools Of
the United States.
The Durham recorder. [volume] (Durham, N.C.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-25

The storage battery cars re.
Gently tried in Dubuque have
been pronounced q failure, but
the Philadelphia Company in.
Producing them claims that the
local company misrepresentsth the
facts because Il wants to con.
solidate with an overhead wire
company.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
When and Whom to Marry,

AS to the age when people should
marry, the lady should, in my opin-
ion (says Rev. DR.. McKendree,) be
twenty or twenty-five, and the gentle
man five years her senior Poor men
cannot marry extravagant girls, who
expect as good q home as their
parents were only ableto acquire after
many years OF toll. The deceit prac-
ticed on both sides is very great. The
ugly sutton gets tailor to hide his
deficiencies; the unsightly maiden
calls in the aid of her rouge-pot and
milliner. Until recently marriage
brokerage was carried on in France.
We Americans are guilty OF the same
thing in another way. Mothers sell
daughters to the highest bidders, and
daughters sell themselves for gold to
men old enough to be their grand
father. Such women would no more
choose honest mechanics for hus-
bands than they would convicts from
the penitentiary. There is no reason
why women should not choose as well
as men. At present the men have
the advantage. No girl is fit to be a
wife till she can if necessary, cook
meal, make a dress, and keep q
house in order. Accomplishments are
good, but tired husband would much
prefer good square meal. All matches
that are brought about by selfish
motives are unholy, and women who
marry for position or wealth are just
as guilty as those who sell their virtue
for given sum. They, are, in fact,
living life OF legalized prostitution.
Marriages in which there's no adapta
ton are unlawful. AS oil and water
will not unite without alkaline, SO
many couple are united by means
of gold. Such artifcially made
matches are often broken. You may
force alcohol and gum camphor to
blend, but at presence of water the
alcohol elopes and leaves the camphor
a grass widow. In like manner a
third party often steps in between a
badly associated pair, with what
results can be easily seen. None but
those who have been united through
pure motives and deep, abiding love,
have fulfilled the conditions under
which a man and a woman may really
become husband and wife.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
ltCame High.

A gentleman who was in great hurry
rushed into swell uptown hotel few
days since and handed someletters to
atypewriter says theNew York World.
He asked her to copy them, and said
he would be back in half an hour. It
was gorgeous hotel, and the type
writer was beautiful. The shoulders
of her gown were pulled, she wore a
natty toque, the color of her eyes were
brown, and her rings were numerous
and valuable. Over her patent-leather
boots she wore pair of remarkably
smart white duck "spats" and when
she sat down to the keyboard it turn
ed out that she could write almost as
we'll as she looked.
The keys hummed little while, and
then she leaned back in her chair and
waited the coming of the business man.
GLOW much is it?'' he asked as he
showed the letter hurridly in his poe
ket.
1.-TWO dollars" said the young WON.
an, quietly.
The man started, stared, and then
glanced at the gown, and the Jewels.
the duck spats, aud paid her without
a word.
.'Those things all cost money" he
said philosophically, as he passed the
money over and took i'll the details of
the young woman's attire.
"Yes" she said, serenely, as she took
up a uovel, "they are expensive-to
my customers.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
Startling a Stranger.

Down below Natchez, while the boat
was running in close to the left-hand
bank and had stopped her wheels to
avoid a big tree floating in an eddy,
we saw a native sitting on a stump
fishing. He sat bent over, hat on his
eyes, and there was scarcely a move
ment to tell that he was alive. We
had a smart Aleck with us on the
promenade deck, and he had no soon
er caught sight of the native than he
called to one of the deck hands to
toss him up q potato. A peck or
more OF the tubers were lying loose
near a pile of sacks, and one was
quickly tossed up.
"NOw see me start1e him." said
Smart Aleck, as he swung his arm for
a throw.
The distance was only about a hun
dred feet, and his alma was SO true
that the potato landed ON the natives
head with dull thuG. His motions
were SO quick that We couldn't agree
as to how he did it, but in about three
seconds he had dropped his fish-pole,
pulled a revolver as long as his arm,
and fired at Smart Aleck. The bullet
bored hole in his silk hat, just above
his hair, and the young man sank
down in q heap and tainted dead
away. When we restored him to his
senses he carefully felt of the top of
his head, looked back at the fisher
man and absently asked:
did she explode both boilers, or
only one?"
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
Quaint characteristics.

Emphasis goes a long way in making
speech interesting. An old fellow on a
down east fishing smack was looking
out lazily into the water. Seeing some
objects moving he asked another old
fisherman: "Be them porpoises?"
The other old oracle lazily replied
without moving an unnecessary
muscle: ~ don't know as they be,
and don't know as they be-"
This oracular answer gave entire
satisfaction.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
At the End.

She was a bright girl, and they were
at the seasons last game of base ball.
She had won his enthusiastic heart by
understanding the game right off, and
he loved her even more than if she had
been his only sister.
at reminds me of the household"
he said. ''The plate, the batter, the
fowls and the flies, etc.
''And it reminds me of marriage"
she added. "First the diamond, where
they are engaged, then the struggles
and the hits; then the men going out;
and, finally, the difficulty they HAVEN
getting home!"
And he sat and thought and thought.
philadelphia Times.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
He Had Nerve:

"What are your symptoms?" asked
the nerve doctor.
"Well, feel weak"
EXACTLY. Great disinclination to
do anything?
"You've hit it exactly, doctor-dis-
inclination to do anything, and that's
why I've come to see you"
lucky you didn't put it off any
longer. Bad taste in mouth morn
ings."
lawful"
'Vision dim?"
"Can't see across the street.
"You ought to have come here be-
fore. Your nerves want strengthing
Immediately. You've actually no
nerve left"
"No nerve left, you say?" With
sudden energy: doctor, lend me
$40"
When the doctor came back from
kicking the fellow into the street he
muttered: Try to borrow money OF
me! Well, he had nerve" It'd Bits.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
Preparing for Emergencies,

Husband (going to his rich uncle's
funeral.) "Put couple of large
handkerchiefs into my grip, dear. The
old gentleman promised to leave me
$4,000, and l shall want to shed
some appropriate tears"
Wife. "But suppose when the will
is read you find hehasn't left you any
thing?"
Husband. "In that case you had
better put in three"
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
FORCE OF HABIT
Strange Freak Of an old Scotch Sail

Strange Freak Of an old Scotch Sail
or,
It was after dinner at Young's. A
ell-knownw Commonwealth Avenue
physician had been dining with few
professional cronies, and as the cigars
were lighted the talk drifted to the to-
. bacco habit, first in it's peculiar effects
upon the race at large, and then in it's
peculiar effects upon the various indi-
viduals.
81 know a man." said the elder ply
sician, whose income, by the way,
runs into,,theIfve figures; Gin fact, he is
now In my employ, who is the victim
OF the strangest whims in regard to
use OF the weed that ever came under
my observation. He is Scotchman,
about sixty years old. Twelve years
ago he deserted from the English Navy
and came to this country, when gave
him a place as coachman.
Zone morning Invent into the stable
and noticed that hole about two
feet square had been cut in a parti-
ton between two stalls and little
shelf had been nailed up underneath
it. wondered what on earth it had
been done for, but Donald was away
at the time, and when he came back
it had slipped my mind.
cit was as much as week after
ward before l had occasion to 90 into
the stable again, and when l did I
found Donald standing on stool,
leaning his elbow on the shelf, with a
long clay pipe in his mouth, smoking
away like a good one, and blowing
the smoke through the little window
he had cut. Upon my questioning
him he told me that OF the twenty
years he had passed in Her Majesty's
service ten of it had been on board a
powder ship, where the rules against
smoking were very strict.
During all this time he had been
accustomed four times day to stand
upon chest and lean out of q port
hole to smoke, so that no one would
smell him, and when at last he took
French leave he found that he could
not get any satisfaction out of a pipe
unless INDUCED in the old posture, and
so, from that day to this, you can
find him after each meal, and for half
an hour before coming to bed, stand
ing on that stool blowing the smoke
through the little Window Boston
Herald.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
A Splendid Opening.

Stranger Tin new town)-What's
the show here for a pushing business
man?
Native-First class. What is your
business?
Stranger-Tm an undertaken.
Native-Great Scott! This is the
chance of a lifetime. Come right here.
We have five doctors, and three more
coming here next month. Pittsburg
Bulletin.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
A Quarrel at the Club.

First Club Man-"You should re-
spect my gray hair and not use such
language to me-"
Second Club Man-"But, my dear
sir, you are excited. You forget you
are bald-headed."
First Club Man-'That makes no
difference. You should respect the
gray hair I would have had if 1 had re-
manned single" Texas Siftings.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
Chunks Of orldiy isdom.

Be kind to those who are stronger
than yourself.
When you get a man down hit him
That is one of the few livery cheap
consolation this life affords.
Teach your boy trade; or, if he
doesn't know enough for that, put him
into a profession.
Every man worships either his head
or his stomach; we all despise our
livers.
A great many people are not happy
unless they are miserable.
A man is apt to let things rip when
he goes out on a tear.-Milwaukee
Sentinel:
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
ar M. Diet me see your

Popular M. Diet me see your
tongue.
F. P-Well?
P. M. D.-(absent-mindedly)-
think it needs good, long rest.
F.P.-frigidly-What do you mean,
sir.
P. NJ. D.-Beg pardon. Imean you
need good, long rest.-Pittsburg
Bulletin.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
Ten Grains for Wet Feet,

1t is an innate idea Of the English
and American mind that there must
perforce be some drug adapted to the
ever-varying states of the body which
contains it. So many disorders, SO
many remedies. The faith that never
wavers that nature has panacea for
every i'll is touching to witness, and
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
Up and Down,
The Old Man Knew.
And should

"Pa," said Johnny Shattuck,
''here's an item which says
that Lucullus usually paid $50, OOOfor
a feast. Who was Lucullus?"
'Lou Cullus, Johnny" replied Shat
tuck, was noted actress who died
last year. Those theatrical people are
awfully extravaganza" Inter Ocean.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
To Late To Change:

Old Lady Ito butcher)-Meat is so
dear now l can hardly afford to buy
any.
Butcher-Perhaps you had better
turn vegetarian, mum.
Old Lady-A vegetarian! No. indeed.
Twas born and brought up a Baptist,
and it's to late to change my religion
now.-Texas Siftings.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06

generally seem to be-, four or five.
we believe that ten is the correct dose
Tor wet feet. The qninine bottle is
equal to every emergency, and pro-
duced on all occasions. We are glad
IL Is no worse than quinine; at one
time 1T used to be morphine and
strychnlne pellets; it might even now
pe ether.-Brltish Medical Journal.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
Just the Same.

Brown-Would you speak to me if
you had bushels of money?
Jones-Of course, would; just as 1
do Aow.
Brown-How nice of you.
Jones yes, I'd say mo" every time
you asked for loan.-Washington
Star.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
Alliance Business Agency,
673 WabaSha ST
ST. Paul, Mimi.

seems to flourish in an age of science
and scepticism as vigorously as in the
past. Americans especially exhibit
robust form of this faith American
girls, it is said, now carry about with
them ornamental cut-glass bottles
containing quinine pills, with which
they dose themselves from time to
to time. II fatigued, they take two
pills; if chilly, one; if hungry las they
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
A Little Lesson.

Mrs. rvenoo(patronizingly)- $50,
you don't know Mrs. Berrydim? Such
a charming widow lady!
Miss Keene (pointedly)-No, but 1
know her brother, a nice young bach
elor man and her father, a lovely old
widower gentleman.-Pittsburg Bull
letin.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
A Fit Subject.

The Mesmerist-Wills some one who
is acquainted here kindly select good
subject and ask him to step up?
Voice from the audience don't
want man of strong will power,
do you?
Mesmerist-No, sir. Just the op-
posite.
Voice-Here he is; the only man in
the crowd who allows his wife to Sc
lect his neckties for him.-Clothier
and Furnisher.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
The Point Of View:

Mr.. Murphy entered a bar-room and
called for q glass of whisky. After
drinking it he said to the barkeeper:
'Charge it,
81 don't know you"
''My name is Murphy"
The barkeeper, turning to the pro-
pietor. inquired: "Is Mr. Murphy
good for drink"
''Has he had it?"
"He has,"
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
A Seasons Work,

Housewife-Will you clean off tn is
snow fora quarter?
Boy-Yes'm.
Housewife-Well, after you have
cleaned off the front walk and steps 1
shall want you to make a nice path
down to the well aud through the
orchard, clean off the cellar doors,
and then bring up some water fro m
down stairs.
Boy-And then, ma'am I suppose
you'll want to have your grass cut
New York Sun.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
WIT AND HUMOR.
SOMETHING TO CHASE AWAY
THE BLUES.

Startling a Stranger--He Had Nerve
"A Splendid Opening--Too Late
to Change--Hard on the
Grizzly,
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
Not a Liar.

Landlord Hooks (of the Tanner
House, Can you refer me to a work
from which I can learn how the
ancients constructed those catapults
that would throw stones half mile?
Friend-Don't believe 1 can. Why
do you want such Information?
Hooks-Well, you see I've advertis-
ed that the Tanner House is within a
stones throw OF the depot, and now
have to rig up some plan for throwing
that stone. I am enterprising, but I
am not a liar-Munsey's Weekly.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
How He Was Travelling.

The new reporter had heen sent out
to secure an interview with the dis
tinguished foreigner visiting in the
city. He came back and reported
that he had failed.
"What was the reason?" demanded
the city editor. as he travelling
incog?"
"I-I think not" answered the new
reporter, somewhat perplexed. ''He
was travelling aronnd somewhere in a
cab. Chicago Tribune.
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06
Hard on the Grizzly.

Thompson (who has returned to his
western home after ar absence of some
years. What has become of the Mar
tin boys? | haven't seen anything of
them since | got back.
Friend of his youth-They're all eat
en- up.
Thompson-Eaten up? By what?
Friend of his youth-One by a griz-
ely and the other two by conceit.-Out-
ing.
A Doctors Lapsua Linguae,
Fair patient-What is the matter
with met
The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1891-02-06

WIT AND HUMOR.
SOMETHING TO CHASE AWAY
THE BLUES.
Startling Stranger--He Had Nerve
"A Splendid Opening--Too Late
to Change--Hard on the
Grizzly.
Up and Down,
HERE And should
is crown, desire Down.
rhyme fbis of w ths y %;nd and and
modern donkeys inspire it
time, When Why, read
New York Herald
The Old Man Knew.
"Pa," said Johnny Shattuck,
''here's an item which says
that Lucullus usually paid $50, OOOfor
a feast. Who was Lucullus?"
'Lou Cullus, Johnny" replied Shat
tuck, was a noted actress who died
last year. Those theatrical people are
awfully extravagant." Inter Ocean.
A Little Lesson.
Mrs. Parvenoo (patronizingly) $50,
you don't know Mrs. Berrydim? Such
a charming widow lady!
Miss Keene (pointedly)-No, but I
know her brother, a nice young bach
elor man and her father, lovely old
widower gentleman.-Pittsburg Bull
letin.
Just the Same.
Brown-Would you speak to me if
you had bushels of money?
Jones-Of course, I would; just as
do Aow.
Brown-How nice of you.
Jones-Yes, I'd say mo" every time
you asked for loan.-Washingto
Star.
To Late To Changes:
Old Lady Ito butcher)-Meat is so
dear now l can hardly afford to buy
any.
Butcher-Perhaps you had better
turn vegetarian, mum.
Old Lady-A vegetarian! No. indeed.
l was born and brought up a Baptist,
and it's to late to change my religion
now.-Texas Siftings.
A Quarrel at the Club.
First Club Man-"You should re-
spect my gray hair and not use such
language to me-"
Second Club Man-"But, my dear
sir, you are excited. You forget you
are bald-headed"
First Club Man-"That makes no
difference. You should respect the
gray hair I would have had if 1 had re-
manned single Texas Siftings.
ASplendid Opening.
Stranger Tin new town)-What's
the show here for pushing business
man?
Native-First class. What is your
business?
Stranger-Tm an undertaken.
Native-Great Scott! This is the
chance of lifetime. Come right here.
We have five doctors, and three more
coming here next month.-Pittsburg
Bulletin.
Preparing for Emergencies,
Husband (going to his rich uncle's
funeral.) "Put a couple of large
handkerchiefs into my grip, dear. The
old gentleman promised to leave me
$4,000, and l shall want to shed
some appropriate tears"
Wife. "But suppose when the will
is read you find he hasn't left you any
thing?"
Husband. "In that case you had
better put in three"
Quaint CHARACTERISTICS.
LnlpnaSiS goes u long way In making
speech interesting. An old fellow on a
down east fishing smack was looking
out lazily into the water. Seeing some
objects moving he asked another old
fisherman: "Be them porpoises?"
The other old oracle lazily replied
without moving an unnecessary
muscle: 81 don't know as they be,
and I don't know as thew be-"
This oracular answer gave entire
satisfaction.
The Point of View:
Mr. MurDhv entered q, har-roono and
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1891-05-23
THE WOMAN OF FASHION.
A Novel Riding Habit to Be Seen
In Central Park.
Palmer Dresses at House wcddings-A
louis QHRtorze Coat and a Plain Skirt
OF Almost Any Material Is Smiled
Upon by Fashion Dcvotees.
COPYRIGHT. lso1.l

Up in the park these early spring
mornings may be seen pretty yet odd
picture of a woman on horseback, ar
rayed in an unconventional riding hab-
it. The woman is beautiful young
Spaniard. petite. bright in manner,
graceful. stylish and one which any man
might be proud to accompany.
Yet, for all, the pretty little Spaniafd
often rides unaccompanied by anyone
except the riding master or her hus-
hand; other cavaliers she has none, for
the simple reason that her attire is so
very remarkable that no other men
have been found sufficiently imbued
with the courage of their opinions to
dare venture forth at her side.
The dress that she has chosen is one
Of her own invention, suggested by
things which she has seen and read, but
yet her own after all. 1t is n cross be-
tween a conventional riding habit for
women, a conventional walking skirt,
n pair of Turkish trousers and n man S
riding suit. Yet the combination of all
these conventionalities produces a suit
which is the most unconventional thing
to be seen in Central park.
When a pretty rider stands upon the
ground, Sne LOOKS dS l. GU III d
Sight-fitting bodice with kilt plated
skirt. When she takes n step, the fore
most plat and likewise the back one
may fly apart as if a court petticoat were
opening over quilted satin skirt. But in
this case there is no quilted satin skirt
underneath, and the light is revealed
through the openings in these plaits in
the most shockingly unusual manner
possible. Yet the effect is very pretty,
and on still day one would scarcely no
| tice that the skirt differed from an or
| binary one.
Under this skirt, which is finished
with braid in a tailor-made fashion, the
rider wears a pair of full Turkish trous-
crs; thicltly wrinkled at every inch OF
their length and banded at the knee
with piece of black elastic.
OF course with this the rider sits
astride of the horse, and permits the
skirt to fall down on either sides so that
1t entirely conceals the Turkish trous
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1891-05-23
MURDER And
A Dissipated Shoemaker Kills
His Wife and Himself.
ONLY MARRIED A FEW WEEKS.
he Fired Six Shots at the Woman While
Running from Room to Room.

The Double Tragedy Brought About Over
Four Handkerchiefs He Accused His
Wife of Trying to Steal Them and Struck
Hcr-She Attempted to Defend Herself,
When He Pulled His Revolver.
ENGLEwooD, N. J., May 90. = Frank
Turke, aged 40 years, who kept a small
shoe store on Palisade avenue, quarreled
during the day with his wife, to whom he
had been married but a few weeks, and
finally shot her in the neck, inflicting in
juries which resulted in her death in a
few minutes. He then shot and killed
himself.
Although several of the neighbors
heard the shooting none of them wit
aessed the killing. From what could be
earned from the children who were look
ing in the shop, the double tragedy was
brought about by Turke accusing his
wife of stealing four handkerchiefs. She
Iad packed her trunk and decided to
leave him. She refused to open the
trunk, and this enraged him so that he
struck her and she attempted to defend
herself, when he shot her. She started
to run from one room into another and
he fired several shots at her, only one of
which took effect. 1t is said that he fired
six shots, including the fatal bullet
which he fired into his own breast.
Turke buried his first wife about seven
weeks ago, and engaged his second wife
as housekeeper from an agency in New
York. His first wife's mother committed
suicide in Harlem several days after her
daughters death by jumping from a
third story window.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1891-05-23

mits, and, indeed, suggests, that they
wear garments with the newness well
off Of them and not in any way re-
markable for their elegance or style.
For morning weddings n plain, scanty
skirt of any check or plain material
and the Louis Quatorze coat is suitable.
Even a plain skirt with loose open
bodice may be worn by a guest at one
of these morning weddings. The occa-
sion, while formal one, is not con-
sidered such as to warrant full dress.
Another side to this dress question is
the ethical one, which, with the nicely
not hitherto considered, forbids guest
to run the risk of wearing a better
gown than that in which the bride is
arrayed. The bride is the central
figure, the observed one, the only one
who is entitled to a gown which shall
attract attention and consideration.
For evening wear the shades of hello
trope, pure turquoise and the various
tones of green are fashionable. Red
and black are also much worn, and, in