davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06

to the Inverness, and is very popular
among tourists. The principal OBJ
iects Of interest are Nelson monu-
ment, erected on the summit of the
Cluny hill, al elevation to the east of
the town, hydropathic establish
ment and massive perpendicular
stone bearing curious prehistoric hero
glyphics.
When Sir William and his Ameri-
can bride arrived at Forces they were
received by several thousand persons,
who extended hearty welcome The
council, the provost and the town
band aided in the festivities, and the
ovation went far to heal the wounded
feelings of the baronet. Lady Mid
dleton, sister of the groom, and who
eighteen years $50 was welded at
Altyre accompanied the bridal party
and added to the eclat with which Sir
William and his party were welcomed I.
VIOLATION Hall, where Sir William and
Lady Gordon Cumming spent the first
days of their honeymoon, is one OF the
most perfect specimens of Elizabethan
domestic architecture in Great Britain.
For more than three centuries the old
castle braved the storms which have
swept across the islands, and scarcely
stone has crumbled in all those
years. The halls where the outlawed
society king and his bride sought
refuge from the harsh world have rung
with the tramp of many mailclad
heel, and about the stern turrets fierce
battles have been fought and won.
When the Armada sailed from the
coast of Spain the castle stood com
pleted. It was finished in 1888 by Sir
T. Willoughby, eight years being con-
sumed in the building. The material
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
His Own Funeral.

Capt. Ben Wakefield. of Biddeford,
who lost his life Monday, once at
tended his own funeral, being one of
the few men who have had that priyi-
lege, says the Bangor (Me.) CONNER
cidl. He had gone on fishing trip
down on the Grand Banks and had
been away from home good while
without his family hearing from him.
The same season had proved very dis
astrous to number of other fishermen
who went out from thereabouts, and
the vessel Capt. Ben was in had her
share of hard luck. and the report
reached home that she, with her crew,
was lost. Time passed and Capt. Ben
did not return, until at last his family
gave up all hope that he had been
saved and day was set for the MEM
orial services. The services were held
in the church at Cape Porpoise. The
minister had offered prayer for the alb
sent fisherman who was supposed to
have found his grave in the sea, and
was just beginning his sermon when.
Capt. Ben walked into the church.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
HowL;phtning Makes Glass.

When a bolt of lightning strikes a
bed of sand it plunges downward INTO
the sand for distance less or greater,
transforming simultaneously into glass
the SILICA in the material through
which it passes. Thus. by its great
heat, it forms at once a glass tuDe OF
precisely its own size. Now and then
such tube, known as fulgurlte, IS
found and dug up. Fulgurites have
been followed into the sand by e1cava-
ton for nearly thirty feet; they vary
in size of a quill to three 1nches or
more, according to the bore OF the
flash. But fulgnrites are not a1one
produced in sand; they are found IN IN
solid rock, though very naturally Oh
slight depth and frequently exl rs bg
merely as a thin, CLASSY coating on tne
surface. Such fulgurites occur IN !. as IS
tonishing abundance on the g, SUNNY l.aaS % y
little Ararat in Armenia. The rock ks is
soft and so porus that blocks blocks a u 1901 s,S
long can be obtained, perforaa1t,eaa In nal; oh
directions by little tubes tiled . Win ~
bottle-green glass formed from 'ne
fused rock.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06

ards in spouted cans and poured into our
tin mugs as we hold them out Here
again, it is case of shove, and If you
don't shove forward pretty hard you are
liable to get left.
At 1890 we are rung to our SUNDAY
dinner. This consists of soup, boneo
beef from which the previous soup mas
evidently been made. for there is not the
slightest nutrment in the meat, potaa-
toes in their Jackets, and plum ~ puo.
ding. Here agaia it is manifest thae
quantity gives full place to quality. IL
is also evident that we must scramble
for our food.
The soup is in large tins placed on the
floor, with ladle for self-helpers. Inc
beef is brought round in another TIN
from which the steward extracts IT,
partly with a fork and partly with MS
fingers. The potatoes arrive in another
big tin. Each grabs as many as ne
feels like. and when one is satisfied ne
throws few along the corridor to his
friends. :,
This may appear clever baseball
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06

practice, but it is hardly in accordance
with the etiquette of meal table
But methods and not manners rule the
storage. They are herded like beasts
and they act as such.
On Monday we have porridge for
breakfast, in addition to the coffee, etc
I have been wondering all along who
cleaned our cups and plates. poor
innocent.-imagined that it was done by
the stewards. Not a bit Of it, Louis
has been quietly doing mine, but this
morning Louis is still slumbering, and |
learn that every emigrant washes his
own dishes, going to the cooks galley
for warm water for that purpose. An
other bit of ignominy for me, but have
to take it in with the rest.
Every morning after breakfast all
Storage passengers must get upon deck
while the doctor makes an inspection Of
the compartments
A self-opinionated little fellow is this
doctor, who seems to imagine that he
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06

menu for Monday, Thursday and Satur-
day, Whlle soup, salt cod and potatoes
serve Tor Tuesday and Friday. Wednes-
day mas speciality to itself in soup, hot
boliea beef and potatoes. All very
thriving, If it were not thrown at US.
Every afternoon the women bring out
their own tea and go to the galley for
hot water in their tea-pots. Then thew
have 1east, after which they sit inside
Just over the engine boilers and warm
themselves and dry their clothes at the
same time.
| get great idea of the Englishman's
ignorance OF mixed drinks when 90 to
the bartender for brandy and soda. |
astonlsh him by asking for piece of ice
in it. He silently accedes, and I walk
away to quaff
Half an hour afterward l return and
call for another B. and S. He fills I'D
the glass and | again ask him for ice.
He stares at me and says:
"Why, where is the piece of ice YOU
had just now?"
Ihlngs run very much the same until
our second Sunday night, then the bar
being closed for a very long time, the
whole gang of Irishmen assemble ia
front OF it, and form themselves into a
Come-all-ye choir. The tunes are very
quaint but the verses seem intermina-
BILE, and the vigor Of the vocalists rather
repels than attracts.
BY and by the Scandinayians seize the
opportunity of lull and start their
quaint, but still more unmusical ditties
that is, the rendition is unmusical be-
cause it embraces too many contrary
keys. Then the Irish get renewed en-
ergy and start again. But the Scandi-
navians won't give in, SO the result is
general pandemonium and no bar.
But when all have tired themselves
out and dwindled away, the artful Louis
quietly creeps up to the bar window and
taps. 1T is opened, and Louis says,
with a fearful innocence:
81 didn't sing note."
He gets drink
On Tuesday I retire sullenly, for we
are due in New York. Wednesday, /
feel more and more homesick as the day
passes by and no Fire Island is in sight.
At last we sight the lighthouse, and |
can't hep falling On my knees.
When we reach Sandy Hook I almost
dance with JOY. But when we arrive at
quarantine, after shutdown, and find we
have to anchor there all night within
the hooking sight of Liberty Statue and
the lights of Brooklyn bridge, I sink
sullenly into despair again. So near
and yet so far.
No chance to sleep that night. No
body tries to. The men roar, yell and
Jump with their excitement at being
within sight of the promised land. The
women answer with shrieks and screams
of laughter and SnatCheS OF song.
At 2 o'clock the donkey-engine goes
bling! bang! bang! drawing up the bag
gage from the hold. At 6 o'clock we go
forward on deck and are inspected by
the Health Officer, and at o'clock we
reach the desired haven, pass through
the necessary formalities, and my pur-
gatorial career as an emigrant is over.
HARRIS HARRINGTON.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
Three Pronunciations.

"What do you think of this taccarat
scandal ?" asked Shingles.
"Baccarat," replied Dukane; "you
mean baccaraw. don't your"
"Is that the way to pronounce it ?"
"Of course! I'll leave it to Dinwid-
die"
"All right! Dinwiddie, how do you
pronounce this game that the Prince
of Wales and Sir William Gordon
Cumming played at Tranby Croft?"
"I pronounce it bad, sir very bad
tough, in fact. Pitts burg Chronicle.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
A Bad Precedent

Mrs. Motherhood Why is it I have
such time finding nurse-girl for my
children?
Employment Agent Well, you see,
mum, some time ago lady had a baby
die, and she thought so much of that
baby that after it was dead she kept
the baby's nurse right along at the old
wages, with nothing to do but walk in
park, pretending she's got the baby
with her. Since then I can't get a
nursegirl to go into a family where
the baby looks healthy. -Ne.O York
WeeEM.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06

a744rtiVxs OF MANY incidents of both humOr
and pathOS. Therefore, determined to
make my return trip to America, after
i've weeks holiday in Europe, means
transformation and profit cannot now
SAY, pleasure.
Gonsgning my baggage to the care OF
4 friend who Travelled by the saloon, |
content myself with the toughest suit of
cl0thes | can find, and armed with
hugo bundle, consisting of mattress, a
heavy rug, a brush and comb, towel and
SOAP tin cup, two tin plates, and knife,
fork and spoon, ] embark upon the ten
der at Princes Landing, Liverpool, En-
1land and amidst an uncomfortable
crowd of people and baggage, / find my
self on my way to "the ship that's to
carry me over"
Az last we reach her, and mount to
tI1eGupper deck, having my bundle thrown
up after me III q very unceremonlouS
manner
II already begin to realize that am
not feeling very haDpy-I grasp my bun
de and look around. "Down-stairs, F"
says a gruff voice. and another uncere-
monous shove brings me opposite o
rickety-looking ladder, down which |
have to climb. My incumbrance causes
merather to fall than walk down, and
WhGn | rcaCn the lower Qeck, SlC on
thebundle and sigh.
Ihayen't been sitting there minute
before | get another ungent!e shove,
and gruffer voice eXclaims, "DoWn-
stafrs!"
NNhat!" gasp, "more descent?"
Then [ look down a large opening into
what | thought was the hold for cargo
or eatte, and | see more rickety ladders
with iron guides, and | almost weep as
land on the first step and roll down the
rest
SIS this the steeragc?" / ask.
Yes; get your bunk" is the reply.
Get your bunE?" | murmur, plain
tiveIy; but where am | to get it?"
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
NUMBER 8.
WHERE SIR GORDON LIVES.
How Cumming and His American Bride
Passed Their Honeymoon.

How Cumming and His American Bride
Passed Their Honeymoon.
The notorious haccarat scandal
which lately set all the world agog
and shook the greatest throne of mod
ern times to its foundation, has thrown
glamour of romantic interest about
the belongings of the principal actor
in the scene, the unfortunate Sir
William Gordon Cumming
The accompanying cuts give an ex-
cellent idea Of the appearance of two
of the gentleman's favorite haunts-
Altyre, at Forces, in the north of Scot
land, and Violation Hall. Lord Middle
toms seat in Motifs. Altyre is fine
old mansion, about which center many
memories of times long gone by.
"How far is it called to Forrest" in
CURED Banquo of Macbeth, and the
query of the original of the famous
ghost has been repeated. with varia-
tions and additions. many times since
the skeleton has been discovered in
the closet of the popular baronet.
The town of Forres is on the highway
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06

is placed there for no other purpose
than to keep his mustache in order and
full view l ask him for some cod-liver
OIL
"Why don't you bring your own cod
liver oil?" he replies.
/ venture to suggest that don't keep
drug store.
"Neither do I. Passengers bring their
own"
All! At last am passenger" at any
rate. I had begun to think was only
thing.
Later on I remarked that a seidlitz
powder would be useful, at which in.
timation he slammed the door in nv
face.
find that the matron of the steerapo
daily gives the doctor ongue-lashing,
and that everybody on board hates him,
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06

iron tank filled with water from taps.
Perfect abluton is cut OF the question.
am crowded away the moment | touch
the water, and the bell rings for break
fast before I am properly dry.
Our Sunday breakfast consists OF
bread butter, and coffee. The bread
and butter (same old axle -grease) is in
tins on the table, the coffee, ready
MIXED condensed milk and water, with
4 prepondcrance CT the latter and
sugared, is brought round by the stew
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
Limberlip's Loquac.ty.

"Yo' pashtur' hab ter 'nounce ter dis
congregation dat on de forfcomin'
Chuseday ebenin' Perfesher Nozzel-
tester will glib a Interpretation on
character as REFLECTED in de art oh
snorin', an TO de puppus er maxim de
'casion full er marrer ter de presen'
comperny he will erply de funnygraf
ter de nasual fackelties er sutton egs-
perts in dis fol-, an afterwards, in de
course oh de lectur, tu'n de crank an
let de perfeshernal snorers er dis
chu'ch hear TO darse'fs de sorter music
dey s'plies DER breddern wild endurin'
de sarmons. Elder Yawp, Deacon
Buzzfue, Brudder Bundle an Sister
Treetode am speshually quested ter
bring dair double barreled trombones
wild EN- on dis ercasion, an low de per-
fesher ter can few er dair bes' nasual
oblergatters fo' comparison wild de
works er some udder shelf dovers in
dis line. Boston Courier.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
Rusiness Head.

Husband-I save 81 by buying That
cigar by the box. How nice it
would e h. # YOU would only buy ny t ave
boxes sa r Ge i away and give me the $2o
you save for q new dress
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06

However, after dinner to day he las .
chance to show his brutality.
We are all mustered down stairs. and
those who are vaccinated receive tickets
"VACCINATED! RETAIN THIS.
Those who are not vaccinated have 70
pass under this brutal scalpel's hands
He Just gives them dig or two Fought
with the knife, and shoves them on IN
make way for the next.
Our dinner to-day consists of sonn
corned beef, and potatoes. This is the
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
A Sad Condition.

First Bank President-Did you see
about the president of the Ninth Ma
tional? No sooner was he dead than
they discovered that he had defaulted
to the amount of 100000.
Second Bank President-Yes,I saw
it. It is getting SO bank president
can't die with any safety.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
Dian,t >trike Him as Unusua..

Sunday School Teacher Tommy, in
this conflict of David with Goliath,
what great lesson may we learn ?"
Tommy don't see nothin' very big
in it, ma'am. David whipped of
course, but the prophet Samuel had
been coaching him right along"
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
He Carried Them Long Enough.

Postmaster-So you would like q
position as letter carrier. Have you
ever had any experience?
Applicant-Yes, sir; my wife has
always given me all her letters to post.
You might ask her.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06

NElyer there" am told, and as the in
formal ton is accompanied by no further
direction, prefer the request:
MONT you please show me where it
sisYn
a<}per there, | told yer!" yells the gem
flerann in brass buttons, and he ShoveS
mL Inward narrow doorway.
T begin to wonder whether this SHOW
Ing il customary all through the voyage.
AlNss l speedily find out that 1T is
!, very general practice.
Bnwever. l go through the door, ana,
y $50 many struggles, manage to squeeze
: my bundle through the aperture, ana
There I see two long rows, on each side,
0f hat appear to me to be shelves. A
young fellow in shirt sleeves is arrang-
m& Dmething on one of the shelves, ana
4 I 6imidly venture to ask:
@aFhich is my bunk. please?"
ny bloody one yer like" he says;
A Mfzsk come, fust served Then seeing
~ nae perplexed, he kindly adds, "Yere,
,Aish0xe yer things up yere next to mine. ;"
nI@ he lifts my bundle and throws 1t on
toNne of the top shelves.
d In the horrible truth dawns upon
, me This is to be my bedroom, that
II lnX mink, and the slight partitions, two
! Snehes high are all that will separate
da7Fns of us during our forthcoming
kI0Mbers
re off. Shortly we have our first
I" WeNIr bread, butter and tea. That IS
6ueh names apply to similar-looking ar
IL Ga shore, but the present condi-
ks look suspicious, and as | fortified
lt II with a powerful meal before |
" Nx& barked | refuse the alurements OF
,ai f#{S repast, ana content myself with
I60kEhg around, and studying my fellow
e7N1&r Pants
H mum Der in all am speaking only
inn be steerage-three hundred and
.skYvS y six persons. two hundred and SIX
~ x{& Use being males and the remainder
W02aNn and children. Our nationalitles
SeoHNfise Germans, Norwegians, Swedes,
! ksiS ans, Fins. Polish Jews, Polaks,
/ MI n Jews lin families of three and
f&HK aud amounting to about fifty III
bout ten Britishers, fully fifty
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
Undivided Affection.

"Will you marry me?"
"Do you love me for myself alone ~
"Why, of course. Did you suppose
I loved you for the sake of your six
maiden aunts and four old-maid sis
tiers? Don't be unjust, Clara.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
HUMOR OF THE WEEK.
STORIES TOLD BY FUNNY MEN
OF THE PRESS.

Many Odd, Curious. and Laughab'e
Phases of Human Nature Graphically
Portrayed by Eminent Word Artists of
Our Own Day.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06

HAVE spent twelve
days ia the steerage
of an emigrant ship,
and | am still alive.
The Steerage of an
emigrant vessel -
even though it be on
an Atlantic liner--is
"a by no means
|palatiai abode, and
the conserving to-
gether of compare
tive strangers for
days in a confined
cnnn ,orCt no rt,n
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
Light on a Misty Legend.

Customer What do you mean, sir,
by saying that you are selling at cost?
I've been in this business myself, and
I know your prices are up 100 per
cent.
Isenstein-Vell, We are selling at
cosd-vat ii cosd the customer.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
Quite in Her Line.

Mrs. Dresser Why, John, why do
you go on SO about eating shad? Tn
sure the bones don't annoy me at all
Mr.. Dresser-Of course they don't!
You never feel so much at home as
when you have your mouth full of pins.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
\ A SHIPS STEERAGE,
GROSS THE OCEAN ON A SEC
OND-CLASS TICKET.

Experience of a Passenger Who Tried 1T
nom Curiosity-Huddled Like Cattle
Emigran@s Roughly elights
lDn a Dark subject
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
le Man-Read it.

Clerk-"Before | took your Elixir
my face was sight. You ought to
see it now. Send me another bottle
for my mother-in- Raw Brooklyn
life
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-08-06
Ambiguous.

Clerk Ito patent medicine NAM
Here is curious credential from one
of our customers.
Madicina Man-Read IL
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1891-08-25
EUROPE IN Brief.
Rewsy Notes by Cable to the Times From
Rcyond the Atlantic.

NfMsF NOTES DN IAbto W VITO AAtiA'H N'"A-A
BcVond the Atlantic.
A rruesome story comes from Lille, France.
Professors Deberre and Nertheimer have
been carrying on experiments with the heads
and bodies Of two murderers recently execu-
ted By the gniilOtipe. They claim 10 have
discovered signs Of vitality IN the heads
considerable tine after the execution, but no
evidence OF consciousness.
The cathedral authorities OF Ireyes have
GIVEN IL 10 be understood that the real
material Of tho Holy Coat is being exhibited,
and not merely the cover Of the garment. tho
cover having fallen of in the course Of ages,
and being completely removed during the
onurse of ages. Among the visitors 10 the
cathedral is a lady. ninety years OF age, who
saw the coat in 1910 and 1874. and a man
named Martin Kohn, living near Ulm. who
walked on loot to lTeyes IS ne had previously
walked 10 Rome and 10 Jerusalem.
The sudden death of Postmaster General
Raikas to-day has taken the public by sur
nrise as no one supposed that he was in any
HANGER Of a fatal result. He is extolled as
thefounder OF the extensive parcel post sys-
TEN. His grandfather was the celebrated
Robert Raikes, who founded the system of
Sunday schools in 1871 "a.
The Liberals are very hopetul OF reducing
the Tory vote of Lewisham greatly, II they
DO not win the seat The question OF home
rule for Ireland is being made more eonspieu-
Gus than il has been in.recent elections. The
temperance people are working FOR the Libe-
raj candidates.
A dispatch from Belgrade, Seryia. says that
n Russo -eeryisn bank has been opened there
with a large capital.
Acute trichinosis prevails Al Mnhiau, near
Eslaun. Sarony. Thirty people are Ill and
several have died from eating infected pork,
evidently OF German breeding. The local
inspector of moat has been dismissed from
Office and prosecuted
The London Standards ST. Petersburg cor
respondent says that the United States Min
ister Charles Emery Smith. acting under IN;
structions from Washington, has requested
an interview with the Minister OF the Interior
10 discuss the question Of the emigration OF
the Russian Jews TO America.
A dispatch from Swansea. Wales. yesterday
says that An explosion occurred IN mine pit
near Merthyr-Tidyill. So far two bodies have
been recovered, and IL is feared many more
are buried beneath tho dsbris.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1891-08-25

st Meeting OF OIstermen a Resolution
Amending the Present Law Is offered.

~ "A Meeting OF Oystermen Resolution
Amending the Present Law is offered.
GLOUCESTER COURTHOUSE, Va, August "a
Especial. AT an oyster meetingat Hogg Store
Saturday night the following was unanimously
adopted:
Resolved. That the present law should be
amended so as TO procure an accurate and
permanent survey Of all of the natural rocks
and ali Of the planting grounds IN the waters
of the Commonwealth and that the bound
aries between the natural rocks and the
planting ground should be defined by proper
metes and bounds.
Mr. f. A. j. Oliver, planter and pioneer
in these parts in the advocacy OF the modern
ideas lin the oyster culture, showed IL an IN
terestng speech that the interests OF planters
and tOngeTs are identical. He favored per-
manent lease Of the planting ground
Messrs Carmine. Hogg and Booker spoke
in behalf Of the tOnGers, claiming that natural
rocks are taken for planting grounds and that
the inspector ls partial 10 planters.
Resolutions were offered asking for now
inspector. and iavoring the two and half
inch Gull law.
Mr.. Catlett opposed the resolution and tried
to show the folly of such a culling law, and
he claimed that whatever ground Of com
plant there might be was due TO the present
law. ,,
The resolutions were laid on the table till
the next meeting. Our people are not far
apart on this question. and if passion and pre-
iudice can be laid aside, and If sober counsel
can prevail, We may yet be agreed.