Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-03-25
MISCELLANEOUS.

four children, who are all alive and do
ing well.
| 81 haven't told anybody lost my
job. How did you know it?" ''Yor
, did get fred, didn't yol?" eyes"
''Well, I heard the report of it.''-Chi
cago Tribune.
Mr. Dolley is a very d fferential
man marked Amy to her mother.
eyes," assented the old lady' ''he's diff
Tered with everybody ever since he was
little boy"
"A correspondent wants to know il
lifts are hereditary" Any small boy
clothes could tell him they are not.-In-
dianapolis Journal
The Little Diplomatist, Scarf, it is
not very good of you to say bad things
of your friend behind his back eyes,
but father, when say them to his face
he beats me. ''-Fliegende Batter.
De Fer-''I feel like new man this
morning" Waite (anxiously)-''Ahl
Do 20 feel any thing like the kind of
a man that would be apt to pay a debt
of five dollars?" He paid it-Manhat-
tan.
e. Elwood. of Mount Morris, Mich,
guessed he would die nine years hence.
He was so sure of it that he had his
ombstone erected and dated 1899. His
prophetic vision was at fault, as he has
just died.
"A Lesson in Economy. -''I wish you
wouldn't bite threads off with your
teeth" said Mr.. Skinnphlint to his wife
You'll wear your teeth out, and the
set my first wife left wouldn't fit you. :"
Chicago Tribune.
An Englishman called upon Sir Wal
ter Scott, saying he wished to see the
great lion of the North. Scott politely
invited him to dinner, saying "That
the lion of the North is best worth see
ing at feeding time"
The cranberry is recommended as a
house plant for the following reasons:
The foliage is shapely, delicate and
evergreen, while the bright crimson
berries remain on the plants in all their
beauty until very nearly time for the
flowers to appear
Butcher, who has been reioiced by
the birth of a son, is informed that the
child weighs nearly eight pounds. He
takes him in his arms to feel his weight
and calls out astonished: by Jove, so
he doesr' then after moments pause
adds: ''But with the bones, mind you"
-Fliegende Batter
"A New Orleans letter says that a
charming feminine school-teacher at
Bayou Teche is, with Cupid's help, play
ing havoc with hearts on Bayou Teche.
One young man tried to drown himself,
another took laudanun, and third
will hang himself all on account of get
ting the grand bounce
An Ohio man who married without
a license was proceeded against at law,
but he held that God ordained man to
marry and threw no obstacles in his
way, and that man had no legal right
to thvart Gods viii He pleaded his
case so well that he was acquitted
Detroit Free Press.
1t takes a business man to describe
a costume to his wife. A busy son of
commerce, after seing a very taking
dress on a very taking shopper recently,
informed the partner of his joys that 1T
was fine. The dress was made of some
kind of cloth, with some sort of trim
ming. It was sorter lilac or shrimp
pink in color, and had for a waist some
kind of a basque that was indescriba BILE
She wore one of those hats you some
times see on women, and altogether
gave an effect that I wish you could
have seen. IN. Y. Sun.
Mr.. E. NJ. Shepard, of Bridgeport.
Conn, has some young kittens whose
mother disappeared soon after their
birth. Deserted and cold, the poor lit
tie things made their way to setting
hen few feet distant, and tried to get
under her wings. At first Biddy re-
sented this, and peclzed at them vic
iously. But the kittens persevered and
at last she gave them shelter When
her chicks were Matched few DAYS
after this, the kittens at once became
very fond of them. The kittens refused
to be separated from the chickens, and
with them follow the mother all day
around the barn yard.
School Mistakes. =" Fallacious +"
means likely to fall" as ''He rode a
fallacious horse" A girl in the course
of an essay on the pictures in schools,
saids "sight is gift of nature, for
without sight, pictures would be of very
little use" In the certificate examina-
ton, second-year student wrote: "Con-
stantinople was formerly not belonging
to England, anj was dull place, as the
Turks generally are; but, since it has
belonged to us, it has frightened up,
and is now the key to the Black Sea-
Another student said glaciers move
"down slopes along valleys, over hills,
just as streams DOL ournal of Educa-
ton, London.)
-''If the Broadway Surface Railroad
were far Western corporation, doing
business in that region, it would afford
embarrassments to enterprising horse
thieves, for every horse in the com
pany's service. is numbered, and the
number is branded in the newest and
oldest imaginable place-on the upper
part of the front of the hoof. AS soon
as a horse is purchased the company's
blacksmith gives him a new set of shoes
and brands his number upon his hoof,