Telegram-herald. ([Grand Rapids, Mich.) 18??-1892, 1891-02-15

er with imputity a. regards skating.
10 not know what . handicap i, neither
20 [ care Mr. Weeks can wear such
clothes a. be looks best in, but when il
comes 70 skating take up the gauntle.
On behalf Il Staten Island, the hotbed Of
athletic sports, where frernen are not
allowed sufficient beer money 10 make
an ordinary FIRE any object al all.
VIII acccp: the challenge 10 limited
extent only. l am getting along in years
myself. bat st.l read fine print, though
preferrlng editorials and display ads.
/ am an American by birth. and remem-
her very well the figh. between Heenan
and Sayc-s: also Lydia +. PinkhaIn-was
kissed by her rs child. can saw
cord Of wood In given time, and look
forward 10 pleasing immortality be-
yond the grave.
hereby agree TO skate with Mr.. Weeks
from 500 10 / 800 miles in an easterly di-
rccnon. from any point he may select on
Long or Staten Island, with bare
knuckles 70 q finish. | also challenge
him or any other skater from 20 years of
aga upward 10 skate backward up the
rain water Pipe of the Chicago Audi
forum for gate money and the cham
pionship of tho world. / will also agree
70 challenge Mr.. Weeks or any other
gentleman OF his ago 10 compete with
RE in dalineating on the ice four pages
Of Ssnscrit which / viii select.
also challenge the world 10 compete
with me in skating on the ice an orna-
mental POEM from Browning. which
shall select: also decorating margins Of
same with fancy scroll work. turtle doves
engaged in trystins at springtide; also
eagle with Grace Roman beah and
Spencerian pretzels in his tail feathers.
| will also agree TO skate on more parts
OF myself at one and the same time than
any other man between the ages of 20
and - years respectively.
Will challenge any man Of twice my
own weight ard age TO skate the score of
TIE opera &C II Trovatore backward, to-
gether with scroll work and ornamental
swan az top. wearing doughnut wings
and beautiful full arm movement panta-
lettes.
For purse Of 5000 and funeral ex-
pcrses | VIII agree To skate across Lake
Victoria Nyanza rs soon as the rec shall
b suitable for shat purpose. | also viii
accept a handicap Of twenty rods for
each mile. or anything else that is not
too indgestible.
The following bona fide letter. with
tho name slightly suppressed, is giver
merely - show that good help can al
ways y, had in America IL one goes at it
in the right way. The right name IL not
Earnest Pernarnbuco. but / do not wish
- use The real name. fearing that some
one eles rnaY seek to decoy my new
cossch1aan from TIE before can get him
home:
yESUARY H. u
NoRwAw Hsrkigusr co ~ Y TAR Bfi I'VE See
in your iotsr ia fae new york weekly world
and tainkln hat you mite wish IN employ a
and 70 - some o. your arents l thsOt wood
sply befre eayone eire hal tsken The job
v1sh to know 70 yuu wished TO ifn-icy man
that = g. years oil and an olsie c-fppel hut can
walk with cut n cane Bria disslski IN enc aruae
can frive . fentei ho-se II desired - bgt don't
tnow cnv thing soput The city = new york
shp hsvr s~en thar for few days | dFd rot
get -nv ss,nanted With .hs st-vass OF n1rnhcrs
hare she svrod ike IN ~ wish to hsvs god
hc-vi ADJ stsod io.z1ts this means a sOsd bed -
rsst "a, after days work don arrass or driven
a. v,su think can r~t ptscs - drive FIR a
itiv or do srrnts ssuse say thai | am ROD
isokia hut dcut ssisss e. aay e1ly thing on this
81 fert pleas II thar a chance IN forul yours
Nth respects FssSzgv FwssAHnUCo.
POI should wsnt s>D S<s&sr~ q month Pc-sie
hzsr-i ana ie<in And w<shfn yoFtrs truly +. =.
cskn-e ~ tst Sssltn os rTteu
In me fancy | can sea paescsf trying 20
got from the Cortlsurit street ferry 30
Forty second strees station On three
wheels 20 catch tram. with Earnest on
the box and tazssrsck pole under the
arlr*rca q the OF corner II Cur cs~srh.
while I hold in my hap TIM dished and
e:shsvelcd nice red wheel which now
looks like countrymsn schsracfsr after
one ssss<i,sn IN Ire New York Legislature.
Oh yes. Earnest. We can slsow you The
streets. bat We Garnet ssrpw I'm how 10
sit ~ straight slcng West strses or Ful
ten street or L5wer Bru~slway and look
ike an co exessn kosepa vfsts Ne r7In
rosea driver It = losd cf lssd suDensne
green hi,ies snd Pests p~eas <Ise nsce pant
81 y0rr caxriaxe ard CURSES yon n lov
sir~ori cut tones Yoa ccui3 ak~o run
M s'srents- Tor ne. Bat yon nsrss get
vuursaif out Of the Fcurahrw asskua.