The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1891-10-03
Mr.. AND MRS. sowsER.
Tt Makes Quite . Difference which &
Of the Two In Nfok

r1e that you or any other woman in New
York is out Of her coffinP
Its only-only headache, dear" i.
Yes, only headache; but what do head
aches lead tor II you are not a dead wom-
an before Saturday night you may consider
yourself lucky. Didn't warn you not to
sit In draft, not to wear thin shoes. not
to eat too much in warm weather. Little
good 1t does to talk to a womanr"
You can't help ailing occasionally, she
replied, as she got up to wet the bandaRe
around her head
Mrs. Bowser, look at meP' he said. "a
he struck an attitude and held one hand
aloft When am ever ailingi When do
| you hear me cor@,laiui Neveri And whv
is it! Because, Mrs. Bowser-because |
don't cram my stomach with watermelon
buttermilk, gumdrops, custard pie, sweet
cake, ginger ale, and all that Because |
don't go around with my feet sopping weti
Because l know enough to come in when it
rains Because exercise little common
sense in taking care of myself"
Your dinner is ready"
And Pm ready for dinner. A healthy,
happy person is always ready for his meals
You won't try to get up. supposed"
Not now"
|
You may learn in time, but doubt it. I'd
like to find one woman with about two
ounces of horse sense in her head before
die, but l don't expect to do it. Well. it
can't be helped. l suppose The Lord
made you that way, and it's no use to ar
gue.'
| Mr.. Bowser eats his dinner, smokes his
cigar and sings and whistles as if the
slightest noise didn't go through her ach-
ing head like a bullet 1t never occurs to
him to fan her, wet the bandage or ask if
she can't sip Il cup Of tea. 1t does occur to
him, however, to say, about bedtime
Pm sorry, of course, but then you must
have more sense. I'll 20 up to bed and
you can come when you get ready II you
are going to kick around much. you'd bet
ter sleep in the spare room"
Now and then the tables are turned.
Mr.. Bowser comes home to lunch, drag
ging his legs after him and looking pale
and scared.
What's the matter?" asked Mrs. Bow
ser, as soon as Le steps into the house.
Got a sore throat and feel feverish.
IL think Pm going to he sickr
She doesn't call out that it's just as she
expected and declare that no husband in
New York has sense enough to look out
for his health. She knows he was out in
draft in his shirt sleeves. but she doesn't
even mention it. On the contrary. she re
marks:
TRY and eat IL little something and then
lie down. You'd better gargle your throat
and then tie it up"
"Do you-you think it's anything ser
ousf" he whispers, as he grows paler.
II hope not, but it's best to be on the
| D. H.
know, and spinal meningitis begins just
this way"
II believe Pm going to de-" gasps Mr.
Bowser, and he grows so weak that she
has to take off his coat and vest and get
him on the lounge. Everything about the
house is ordered to go on tiptoe. and even
the cat Is put out and the clock stopped
After his throat has been tied up, his shoes
taken off and quilt thrown over him Mr.
BOwser plaintively inquiries:
Don't you think you'd better send for q
doctors"
mot just yet. dear don't think it's
very serious"
MRS Bowser, believe Pm already
struck with DEATH"
"Nonsensel You've just got little in
fammation of the tonsils."
1--WE felt for some days rs il a great ca
lamity hung over this household. Hadn't
we better have two doctors?"
Just try and get to sleep. Mr.. Bowser,
and I'll warrant you'll feel better by
night"
"Ahl how suffer-" he groans. you
may be widow before the week is out
hope you will always be kind to our child.
| have tried to be good husband. and
and"-
Mrs. Bowser lays her hand on his fore
head tenderly. and the tears come to his
eyes and he suddenly becomes great big
BOBBY She has to hold his hand to get
him to sleep, and when he wakes up he
wants tea and toast and Jelly and he Is AZ
petulant as sick baby until finally put to
bed. He Is a new man when he awakes In
the morning, and when she asks after bis
throat he replies:
"Throat-humph. Mrs. Bowser, for
about five hours yesterday was lowering
between life and death. Had 1t been you
you would have died ten times over. but
grit pulled me through"
''Gritf'
Yes. Grit-sand-pluck-Sp cour-
age and fortitude. ! let none Of You know
how bad ! actually was, but Just shut my
| teeth and determined to live and here In
the result Of it. Ali Mrs. Bowser, II you
only had hundredth part Of my courage
and will power you'd be far different wo-
man from what you are now-a far diner
emit womani"-M Quad In New York
| World.
The Medical Profession.
The attitude of the medical profession
to what is known as ''patent medicines
is not at all unreasonable. Thousands of
these nostrums are offered to the public
every year. Some of them are dangerous
and some OF them are futile. Swift's Spe-
cific Is. s. s., We are all glad TO say, 10
not classed among these nos'rums IL
has overcome the wholesome prejudices
of physicians in all par OF the country,
and some of the It ongest testimonials in
it's beh II come from medical men who
have used it in their practice and who do
not hesitate to endorse it's wonderful re-
suits This In ext emely gratifying, out
by NO means astonishing, fOr every claim
<fan a. ,>.,< foswar RI Il, hn4Raif OF y. b. b. 10