The morning call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1878-1895, 1891-04-26
DOMESTIC DEVOTION.
Coaching Thai Brought About Very Affect
ing Sequel

From London Punch
Scene the First-At the Galahad-Green
Mrs. G.-G.-GaIahad!
MIR. GIG. (meekly) My loyef
Mrs. G.-G.-I see that the proprietors of
''All Sorts" are going to follow the American
example, and offer prize of $40 to the wife
who makes out the best case for her nus
band as model. It's just as well, perhaps,
that you should know that I've made up my
mind to enter you!
Mr.. GIG. (gratiied)-My dear Cornela |
really, I'd no idea you had such a
Mrs. G.-G. -. Nonsense! The drawing
room carpet is a perfect disgrace, and as
you can't OF wont provide the money in any
other way, why-Would you like to hear
what I've said about you?
Mr.. G.-G.-Well, il you're sure 1t wouldn't
he troubling you too much, should, my
dear.
Mrs. G.-G.-Then sit where I can see you,
and listen. (She reads) "Irreproachahle
in all that pertains to morality land it
would be bad day indeed for you, Gala
had, if l ever had cause to think otherwise
morality; scrupulOusly dainty and neat
in his person"-ah, you may well blush,
Galahad, but, fortunately. they wont want
me to produce you The imports into cur
happy home the delicate refinement of a
preuX cheYalier of the Ulden time" (Will
you kindly take your dirty boots of the steel
fenderD "Ne rule our little kingdom with
a Joint and equal sway, to which jealousy
and friction are alike unknown; he consid.
crate and induigent to my gOmanly weak
ness You need not stare at me in that per-
fectly idiOtic fashion u looking 10 him
for the wise and tender support which has
never yet been denied. The close and daily
scrutiny of many years has dlScOvered'-
(What are you shaking like that fol-? )-
discovered no single weakness; no faint or
flaw of character; no irritating trick of
speech or habit" (Hew often have | told
you that l will not have the handle of that
paper-knife sucked? Put it down; dob
His nyerSation-SparklIng but ever spir-
itual-renders our modest meals Veritable
feasts of fancy and flows OF SOUL. Well,
Galahad?
Mr.. G.-G.-Nothing my dear; nothing. IT
struck me as-well, a trihe flOwery, that
last passage; that's all.
Mrs. G.-G. (seveCely)-If l cannot expect
to win the prize without descending TO
fi0werinesS, whose fault is that l should
like TO knowP II you can't make sensible
observations you had better not speak at
ALL Coatinuing) "Oyer and over again,
gathering me in his strong, loving arms and
pressing fervent kisses upon my forehead,
he has cried, Why am | not monarch,
that so | could place diadem upon that
brow? With such c0nsort am [ not
doubly crowned? Have you anything to
say to that, Galahad?
Mr. G-G.-Only, my love. that II don't
seem to remember having made that partic-
ular remark.
Mrs. G.-G.-Then make it now. I'm sure
| wish to be as accurate as | can, Mr. g.
G. makes the remark, but without ferYor.1
Scene the secOnd-at the MOnarch-Jones'.
Mr.. M.-J.-Twenty quid would come in
precious handy just now, after all I've
dropped lately, and l mean to pouch that
prize if | can-s0 Just you sit down GrizZle
and write out what | tell you; do you hear?
I fu1id I1rl-- Mnuarqf, daar
would that be quite fair? No; don't be
angry. / didn't mean that-Tll write what
ever you please.
Mr. NJ. J.-You'd better. that's all ! Are
you ready? l must screw myself up an
other peg before | begin. He screws.) Now,
then. Stands over her and dlctates.) 10
the polished ur0anity OF perfect gentle
man, he unites the kindly charity OF true
Christian" OWhy the devil don't you
learn to write decently, ehJ q" Liberal, and
even lavish, in all his dealings, lie is yet
stern foe to every kind OF excess -lHoid
on a bit, l must have another nip after
that)-'eyeTy kind OF excess. Our mar
Tied life is one long dream OF blISstul con-
tentment, in which each contends with the
other in loving self sacrifice" (Haven't
you corked all that down yetD "Such cares
and anxieties as he has he conceals from
me with seruDulous consideration as long
AS ble"-fGad, | should be a fool II 1
didn't i)-'while l am ever sure OF finding in
him q patient and sympathetic listener 10
ali my triflng worries and diffien tiles. -
| Two rs in difficulties, you little fOol-can't
you even spell2 Many time, falling on
| his knees at my feet. lie has rapturously
| exclaimed, his accents broken by manly
emotion, oh, that l were more worthy of
such pearl among womeni With such a
helpmate. | am indeed TO be enYed ="
| That ought to d. the trick Ii l don't romp
| in after Ihati-(ObSeryina that Mrs. M
Us shoulders are coDVuised-) What the
| deuce are you giggling at now?
| Mrs. M.-J.-I-1 wasn't Cycling, Monarch
| dear, only -
! Mr.. M-J.-Only what?
Mrs. M.-J.-0nly erYingl
The Sequel.
1.-The judges appointed by the spirited pro-
| prietors of 'All Sorts to decide the Model
| Husband Contest-whieh was established
| on lines similar to one recently inaugurated
| by one of our New York contemporaries
! have now issued their award. Two cOm-
| petitOrs have sent in certificates which have
| been found equally deserving of the prize,
! viz: Mrs. COrnelia Galahad-Green, Grae-
mair Villa, Peckham, and Mrs. Griselda
Monarch-Jones, Aspen Lodge, Lordship
Lane. The sum of twenty pounds will con-
seQuently be divided between these two
ladies', to whom, with their respective
spouses, we beg to tender our cordial felici-
tations. Extract from daily paper, some
six months hence.
TynNIJA Mn rUIDDTDIn