The Port Gibson reveille. [volume] (Port Gibson, Miss.) 1890-current, 1891-10-28
THINGS WISE AND OTHERWISE.

eyDdgs lWh0 wants little free advice)
II feel 80 tired and exhausted, doctor.
What ought to take? Wary Physi-
cian-Take a cab, madam.
A correspondent asks, "N hat should
a bOw-legged man do?" This is a puz-
cling question but if he has nothing
else to do, he might start an agitation
IN favor Of wider styles Of trousers.
The Only Thing Left: Traveller
Looks as if you had had a cyclone here.
Kansas Farmer-Yes, one struck my
farm last week and swept off every
thing except a three-th0usand dollar
mortgage.
When a man calls another liar and
a scoundrel, why does the insulted per-
son almost invariably ask, what do
you mean, sir?" II woul1 seem that
such language hardly requires q map
and diagram 10 make it clear.
Far Gone: Little Bettie-Oh, Mr..
Bull, when did you get we'll? Big Sis
ter-Why, Bette, what do you mean? ?
Mr. Bull hasn't been ILL., Bethe-Yes
be has. Papa said yesterday that he
wasn't able to take up his paper.
The Old Mans Sarcasm: Young Sap
py-Base ball is dangerous game. /
was hit on the head by a bat, two years
ago, and knocked senseless. Old Mon
eybags (his father-in-law)-How long
before you expect to recover your sens
es d?
Heroic Measures: Customer-Gim-
me big dose of whiskey and qulnine.
I'm full Of malaria. Druggist-We !
are entirely out Of Quinine, as our last
shipment miscarried. Customer-WeIl, !
gimme the whiskey by itself. I've got
to do something.
Handed Down: Inquiring Lad -Fa-
ther, the paper says you officiated at the
wedding in the traditional garb of the
clergy. What does traditional mean
Rev. Mr.. POundtext (glancing down at
his threadbare suit Of black DIT means
handed down, my son.
Fiendish Revenge: "Vatw said the
leader Of a German band to man who
had watched them from his window,
you no gif nOdding for dot musig ?"
mot cent? replied the citizen with
hopeless emphasis. "Blay, den, some
more" said the leader sternly to his
followers.
HaTpe.'s 5 Bd=ar, on table manners
says: DO not betray by any gesture
that you are hungry" OF course not.
No one is supposed to go the table to
sltisfy his appetite; it Is a mere form.
Any indication that yougo there because
you want something to eat is very ILL
bred Boston Post.
A acknowledging young girl
stepping from the train the other day,
pe:tishly said to her mother, Come on
you are always behind" A white
haired gentleman passing stopped and
asked the girl this question: Never
behind when you we're i'll, was she ~
Chr stidH Advocate.
Fiat Experimentum in Corpore Viii
Rector-I am glad to !
rave been Of any assistance to your suf- !
ering husband. Mrs. Craig; but how
anne you to send for me instead Of your {
,wn minister? Mrs. Craig "a rank {
'resbyterIahl hl-Weel, sir, it's typhus
ny poor mans got, and | dinna like our
in m mister to rim the risk.
Important Business: "0h, paw" I
he said with blush, "young Mr.. Cox
r, the rich coal-dealer, is coming again
lis evening, and says he wants to see !,
Ou on important business" "All "
light, my dear, " responded the old man, !,
hucking her playfully under the chin,
] can guess what he wants." That 4
vening Mr.. COker came TO the point at b
nee: "Mr. Hendricks" he said bold 4
J, Il want TO ask if you have laid in :
our stock Of coal for the winter. lean p
uote some very low prices" =
1t is one of the mysteries of humani- r
= that mothers whose sons have, as h
hey believe, gone down to perdition I,
% regain not merely the faculty of GO Ii
ng on with the business of life, but in 5
most cases even cheerfulness. The In u
mite Truth, the Love of the universe q
Imports them beyond their conscious u
ess, coming to them like sleep from y
he roots Of their being, and having q
othing to do with their opinions or \
eliefs. And hence spring those CON- y =
orting subuerfuges Of hope to which I,
hey all fly. Not being able to trust -,
he Father entirely, they yet say, "Who Il
an tell what took place at che last mo- OF
lent? Who can tell whether God did Il
ot please to grant them saving faith at "
be eleventh hour ?"-that 80 they Ia
hight pass from the very gates of hell, &C
he only place for which their life had 70
tied them. into the bosom of love and cI
urity! This, God could do for all
ais, for the son beloved of his mother, pl
erhaps he might do =. ~
o rebellious mother heart dearer TO -
cd than that which beats laboriously :, -
,lemn under Genevan gown or Luther d,
n surplcei if thou wouldst but read in
7 thine own large light instead of the bl
immer from the phosphorescent brains ce
theologiansl .....Lord Christ not au
one from the pains Of hell or of con- dc