Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1891-08-27
POWER OF LOGIC.

POWER OF LOGIC
The professor of logic Ito hiaself)-I
laid my hat somewhere in this room.
Nobody has come in since I've been
here. | can't see it anywhere, therefore
| Quitting his hand beneath him, l have
sat on it. Another proof of the irresist-
ible power of logic tliegende Blet-
| ter.
THE VALUE OF EDUCATION.
Old Hownow-So you're through col
lege? What are you going to do now?
Young Smilax-Well, | hardly know;
I've had two otfers-one to go in a law
Office for two years at 50 week, and the
other to play third base on the League
team for $4,000 for the season. Boston
Courier
HIS LITTLE DODGE.
Cutely-Here comes Cynicus. See me
get cigar from him. lights n cigar
ette.)
Cynicus (as Cutely pufs the smoke in
his face)-Whew! How can you smoke
those things? Here, take this cigar and
threw that away Puck.
HIS INFERENCE.
81 tell you frankly said the young
lady to the young journalist, that your
company is agreeable to me, but | am
sure papa will not permit me to receive
any attention from you, for he is awfully
down on the newspapers.
"He is down on the newspapers, is
hep said the young journalist smiling.
What scrape has he been in?"-ll New
York Press.
SPIDER AND FLY.
"Will you walk into my parlor?" said
the spider to the fly;
"Well, hardly" said the insect, as he
winked the other eye;
"Your parlor has an entrance, but of
exit it is shy,
So I'll stay outside in safety and remain
a little fly"
HIS SPECIALLY.
"Oh! yes. He's quite remarkable
man. Able to concentrate his mind on
one particular subject, no matter how
great the crowd and confusion around
him. His power of abstraction is simply
wonderful"
"What is his special branch of
science?"
"Kleptomania, | think they call it."
i Washington Post,
NOT so MUCH TO LOVE.
"You don't love me so much as you
did" pouted young Mrs. Mcbride.
Didn't just now say you were worth
your weight in gold?" demonstrated her
husband.
"Yes, but you said that when we were
first married, and weigh seven pounds
less now Pittsburg Chronicle.
APLACE OF SAFETY.
Wagg-We had u terrible thunder
storm as came up in the train this after
noon.
Wooden-W eren't you afraid of the
lightning?
WaSg-No, got behind brakeman
Wooden-Behind brakeman? What
earthly good did that do?
Nagg-Why, he was not a conductor.
Boston Courier.
TWO VIEWS.
Miss Emcrsonia Russell from Beacon
llill)-Don't you think Mr.. Bowles' 5
countenance would arrest the workings
of the interior mechanism of horologe?
Miss Calumetia Porcine from Michi-
gan ayenue)-I don't know, but think
it would stop clock jewelers. Cir
cular.
IT VARIES.
as a point the end of line?"
"Not always. Sometimes it's the end
of pin"
NEW FORM OF PROPOSAL.
Miss Simper-Aren't things much
cheaper than they were last year?
Calloway-Yes, indeed. | only pay
one half as much formy neckties. The diff
ference is so great that now (smilingly) |
could easily afford to get married.
Miss Simper-Oh, Mr.. Galloway, this
is so student Clothier and Furnisher.
TIMELY REBUKE.
They were walking in the starligh
fully three feet apart, when he broke the
silence by saying:
"Do you think the stars are watching
u.s."
Perhaps they are" she replied, "but
it doesn't matter much; they are not
| likely to see ANYTHING" "