davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1891-11-20
CHINAWARE. &c.

A N IMPORTATION OF NEW EARTHEN.
"A WARE.-Do you want Tea Set, or Cham.
Der Set, or Dinner Bet or do you only want
few pretty decorated pieces to fill out until fall
II you do you must not fail to look at the New
Decorated Porcesne We have Just received direct
from johnson Bros. Celebrated Pottery in Hsnley,
England. We have NO hesitation in stating that
you will not find any moro beautiful Porcelaine
in any market and IS we buy these goods direct
from English potters, we guarantee the goods and
prices in eyory instance. Look over your Chins
closet, and soc if the old set ia not about gone.
You will need new set this fall so call no.o and
select it. Besides the decorated which comes In
pencil, and brown print sprays, we have full
line Of the plain white. 11cre is no use IN buying
ener uarc than this porcelGino n ,riU suit tho most
fastid;oty. For sale only, by
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1891-11-20
ZOE f,yrR FIPTYYEARS.

An OLD AHp RELL.TRrED REMEDY.-Ars.
Windows Soothing Syrup has been used for over
Et1v Years by Nil,;s1s Of Mothers for their Chi
Gren While Tects;.s, with Perfect Success. 1t Soothes
tho CaiM, Seftess the Gum, ALlays all Pain; Cures
Wiad Cs.tc and 10 tie best remedy for DtarThea.
Sold By Druggists in overy psrt OF the world. Its
vslue is incalculsb!e. Be sure and ask for Mrs.
Rinsiocs Soots;ng sgrap and take no other kind
Tventy-Gya canta "attlo.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1891-11-20

WARRENTON-Trains Nos. 9, 10, Ii and Ia
onnect daily, 15 and JIG daily, except Sunday, to
and from Warrenton.
FRANKLIN DIvIsIoN-Leave Rocky Mount
Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays $40 a. M,
arrive Franklin Junction $50 a. NJ: leave Rocky
Mount Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays 1000
a. m, arrive Franklin Junction 1:15 p m.
Leave franklin Junction Mondays, Wednes-
Mount 4:4O p. M, AID leave franklin Junction
Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays 7;25 p. n ;
arrive Becky Mount 1920 p N.
SLEEPING CAB sERVICE.
On trains Nos. 9 and 10 Pullman Buffet slecu.
ers between New York snd Atlanta snd At
lanta and New Orleans, and Atlanta and Memphis
via Bennington.
On trains Nos. II and ~ Pullman Buffet Vea-
tibule Sleepers betwoen Washington and Char
lotto; New York, and Washington to Knox
vile via Salisbury and Asheville, and through
coaches between New York and Atlantis.
Through tickets on sale at the principal stations
to all points. For rates or information apply 10
sny agent of the Company, or to
WASHINGTON AND OHIO DIVISION.
ALL TRAINS DAILY EXCEPT SUNDAY.
Leave AlexandrjG from depot at $40 Q. m
and 4:4O p. M; arrive at Round Hill 11:40 a.
m. and ITO p. m. No 4:45 p. m. trsia Sunday.
Leave Alexandria Sunday at $40 q. M and
$50 p. m.
Returning trains leave Round Hill 500 a. m.
and 300 p. M, arriving st Alexandria at o:25
a. 10. and $50 p. m.
Leave Washington at 6:25 p. m. and arrive st
Leesburg at $40 p m. Leave Leesburg at 6:1O
q. M, and arrive st Washington at 653 a. m.
The 9:10 o. m. train from Alexandra connects
at Bound Hill with stage for Blue Ridge, Berry
Vile and Winchester, and at Leesburg with stages
for Aldie and Middleburg.
The $40 o. m. train and 40 p. m. train from
Alexandria connect at Vienna with stagea for
Fairfax Court House.
T. o. TROY, Acting supt., Alexandria, Va.
W. a. TURK, Asst. g. P. A., Charlotte, NC.
VIII. GREEN, Gen. Mgr, Atlanta, Gs.
JAS. L. TAYLOR, G.. P. A., Atlanta, Ga.
SOL HAAS, Traffic Mgr, Atlantis, Ga.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1891-11-20
TEE GAZETTE
JOB PRINTING OFFICE
Is PREPARED TO Do at TIE SHORTEST
NOTICE AND on THE hCST RIA.
6oAABLE TERas
All Kinds Of Book and Job Printing
Opening ana Clcsing of ths Mails.

SO -- N-'-~o ~ s~~S ---
Northern mails clcas at 7:3O and $50 a. n
md 1916 an1 SAG p. n. and S:45 p. n. Open
AZ 500 4. T., 1900 r., sEd Gao p. m.
Gouthern mails, via Charlottesville Virgins,
ciose at 8 % and HOO q. m. and 9.45 P. N.
Open at 600 and 1:47 p. m. and $50 p. m.
Manassas Division uails cloes ct $50 8. n.
and 400 p. u Open at lao q. m.
southern mails, via Richmond Va, closes q.
1920 q. m. 4.45 and 800 p. u. Open at SAB
q. M and 1900 p. m.
Alexandria end Rodnd Hill, We, malls closc 8.
$50 q. m. and 40 P. n. Open 5. 500 a. n and
$3.50 p. N.
Closed mails to Ealls Church, Vienna, FsirisI
CHI, Herndon, Leosburg, PuIcellville and Eouna
Eill, Va olose at z:10 p. n. and open ct 800 an;
Western maiis close at 1886 .. m, 12:45 ana
300 .. N. 0pea st $50 and 1000 a. M, and
300 p. n.
Washington, T. c., mails close at 7:So and 9 80
q. m, md 1915, E:40 and $50 p. N. Open
at s.3t md 1000 g. H., 1900 a., and 800 aid
ONCE Houra-opsn at 500 a. m. Close at $50
D. N. Open at $50 p. N. Close st p. N.
Sunday RoRrs-open at 900 8. N. Close a'
CassIEas' Collections made on 5,
,rip routes-6:30 and 1000 Q. M, 12:2O
zoo and 5:45 p. n. On "Trip route-6:3o $40
1000 =. "a. and 5:45 p. n.
Deliveries mada at 800 a. n, IL N. and 5;Vo
Q. N. IN ~
sunday-Car7isrs window oPea at 900 aaa
close at $50 g, q.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1891-11-20

OTONE MILK PANS, from the factory in Penn.
y sylvania, just received car load, which we
offer at xceedingly low prices Sond In your or
dera, rompt shipment guaranteed.
aug1 E. ]. MILLER q SON.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1891-11-20
LEMON EIIxIR.
lis Wonderful Effect on the Liver, Stomach, Bouels
EidReus and Blood.

0'' wv
Kidneys and Blood.
TT. Moz'ey's Lemon Elixir il pleasant lemon
drink that poi lively cures all Buiousnes', Con.
stipston, Indi sestion, all Sick and Nervous Heal
achep, kidney Disease, Dizziness Loss OF Appe,--
tito, Fevers Chills, Palpitaticn of Heart and oil
other disessss csus,d by disorlered liver. stomach
and kidneys, the first great cause OF ell fatal d.
ti,ts. Tr,pared Only by H. Money, M. D., At
l.uto Ga
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1891-11-20

A CAB LOAD OF STONE JARS & JUGS ius:
n received and fox sale at lowest prices by
aug1 :. J. MILLER & SON.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1891-11-20
EroMran,a Arntca seIve

THE BEST sALvz in the world for Cuts Bruises
Sores, Ulcers, Salt Rhoum, Fevor Sores, letter,
Chapped HsSda CAil5lains, Corns and al Skin
Eruptionr, snd positively cures Piles or no pay
required. II i'd guaranteed to give perfect Salts
faction. o. money refunded. Price 20 cents per
boz For sasa ~ E-Gl Leadbeater & Bro.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1891-11-20

NRUIT JARS.-We are now on our eleventh
e 11) car load Of Fruit Jars for this season. and
yet the orders still como in. Dealers should get
our prices before ordering elsewhere. The
woodbury." FRUIT JAR is no higher now
than the other inferior kinds, and house-keepers
in this vicinity should call and examine this jar
before purchasing. There ia nothing Ike il. Buy
them OF us now. for they are running abort, and
you will need them for your pesches in August.
Remember, they arc the ssmo price as Maeon's,
the Gem" and the other kinds that you have
ua eue1 -. 'A-' ''' Ell. MILLER soN.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1891-11-20

Washington and Southwestern Vestibuled Linn
tied, operated daily between Washington and At.
lanta. Leave Washington, No. 81, HOO p. M;
Alexandris 1923 p. ~; Charlottesville 2 10 q.
m; Lynchturg 1924 s.nl., arriving Danyiile $40
a. M arrive Atlanta 500 p. m.
Returning, leave Atlanta, No. 39, 1.25 p.
NJ; Danville 100 a. M; arrive Lynchburg
3:45 q. M; Charlottesville 5:15 M; Washington
1888 a. m. This train is composed entirely Of
Pullman carr, on which an extra fare is charged,
not exceeding So over and above regular Pullman
charges to any point.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11
F.tare Of wheat in America.

We have had run of prosperity for
some years. and had been regaled with
the thought that we had more food ma
terial than the nation could consume,
and as much to spare as the rest of the
world Knight want to buy. The indica-
lions Ore that the day of heavy surplus
production is fast waning. Our wheat
crop In 1874 was the magnificent total of
612. 760, 900 bushels. 1t has not kept at
the upper notch, and in the year 1889 II
hgnred maximum yield of 400. 800, 900
bushels. We have greater population
by nearly $1,000, 900 than decade ago,
and the increase Of home consumption
would necessitate q larger yield and not
: smaller Economist
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11

What is termed telpherage, or the con-
veyance Of parcels by electricity along
lines Of wires placed overhead, is little
known in this country beyond the stage
of experiment. We have little real need
of this device to assist commercial bust
ness. In South America, however, tel
phernge schemes appear TO DO propitious
TO the specnlator, and line has been
constructed 1856 miles long, which places
Buenos Ayres and Monteyideo in com
munication. Across the La Plata there
Is q swing for the wires OF nineteen
miles, and the initial start for this jour-
ney is afforded by two towers go feet In
height. It is intended to dispatch letter
boxes between the two cities at intervals
Of two hours New YQyk Journal.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11
She Had to wash tho Pets.

A curious case of special interest to
elderly spinsters and lovers of house pets
is shortly to come before the Berlin
courts. A young woman was engaged as
companion to an old lady at stated wages,
but ran away from her place two days
after entering service.
Her mistress procured her arrest under
the law that servant must give due mo-
tice before leaving her situation, but the
police, after hearing the girls statement,
told the lady that she could not compel
the girl to return, and could only claim
damages in tho civil court.
Forthe girl stated, and her statements
have been proved true, that on entering
the lady's fat four immense dogs jump
ed at her. although they did not do her
any harm. In the next room another
big dog, with litter of pups, met her
gaze, while the third room was tenanted
by at least three dozen different varieties
of birds.
The kitchen of the old lady was given
over to cats, and the girls sleeping room
was converted into q temporary hospital
for invalid members OF the animal world.
"The old lady," said the girl, twas
very kind to me, but as my duties con-
sisted in washing all the dogs daily, and
had to share my bed with half dozen
dogs and cats, l was obliged to run away
to avoid sickness London Telegraph.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11
A prama.ist With Iniluenes.

Queen Elizabeth of Roumania has
written q play which she is pleased to
describe as a tragedy, but which Is really
piece of the most wildly and extrava-
gantly sensational kind. It Is entitled
"Meister Manolly," and it is to be intro
duced ut the Vienna Court theatre. The
piece is Of the old transporting order,
with ghosts, murders, wife walled up
alive, and other sensational episodes, and
it is full of preposterous situations, alb
surdly stilted dialogue and Bombastes
Furioso defamation, Queen Elizabeth,
when sho was recently at Vienna, in
vited the company Of the Court theatre
to partake of sumptuous dejeuner OF
the Hotel Imperial, and the champagne
flowed in rivers at the meal. Her mai
esty read the play to her guests, who
applauded it as a matter Of course, and
then she went to see the emperor, and in
duced him to command that the piece
should BIO produced at the Hofburg,
where, as q rule, new plays are not
readily accepted. London Truth.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11
Paying a Creditor.

Like many another famous man, botE
before his time and since, Talleyrand cx.
hibited-at least in early life---a great
reluctance to settling with his creditors.
When he was appointed bishop of Autun
by Louis XVI, he considered fine new
coach TO be necessary to the proper main
tenance of the dignity Of that office.
Accordingly, a coach was ordered and
delivered, but not paid for. Some time
after, as the newly appointed bishop was
about to enter his coach he noticed q
strange man standing near who bowed
continually until the coach was driver
away. This occurred for several days
until at length Talleyrand, addressing
the stranger. said:
well, my good man, who are your
~ am your coachmaker, my lord" re.
piled the stranger.
"Ahw said Talleyrand, ''you are my
coachmaker; and what do you want, my
coachmakerY'
81 want to be paid, my lord"
s'Aht You are my coachinaker, and
you want to be paid2 You shall be paid,
my coachmaker."
"But when, my lordg'
tHumi7 said Talleyrand, settling him
self comfortably among the cushions oil
his new coach and cycling his coach
maker severely, you are very inquisi-
tive. boston Transcript.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11
Just Like His Russian Brother.

The sultan very rarely or never leaves
the grounds of Yildiz Kiosk, except to
go once week to a mosque Just outside.
when the very striking ceremony known
as the Selamlick takes place. Once a
year, also, he pays q visit to STEAMBOAT,
but the route there and returning is
never known in advance. He is in con-
slant fear of assassination. Some grand
duchess whom he received at his court,
on his complaining that his health was
Indifferent, advised him to take more
exercise and change of air, and to drive
about the country. On her departure he
is reported to have said: "What harm
have done that this woman should de-
sire my death2 Why does she advise me
to run into such dangers?' Nineteenth
Century,
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11

The Alaskans, as rule. are not par
,ticularly found of bathing, but some Of
them like occasionally to indulge in q
sort OF Turkish bath of q primitive char
acter. For this purpose a number Of
long sticks are driven into the ground in
. circle four feet in diameter, being
thereupon drawn together and tied at a
point six feet from the bottom. A small
fire Of wood, with stones, is lighted in
the middle. and the heat is kept in with
blankets spread over the framework.
When only the cinders are left, and the
stones are well heated, the bather takes
q seat inside and proceeds to perspire.--
Washington Star.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11
HEADQUARTERS
of
MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS,
Trenton. N. Il. -

Z Sohmer, Mason e
Hamtin, James & Holmstrom !; all
6rst-class Pianos. Tone, pure aud
musical; Workmanship and Mater
iots, high grade; Reputation none
better Styles, Grand, Upright and
Square Cases, variety of designs, in
rosewood, ebonized, mahogany, wal
nut, and oak Prices, right. "a poor
piano is dear at any price Other
Pianos at lower prices, good for the
money.
ORGANS ,---Masoa &C. sI9amhin,
acknowledged to betheshest. Other
makes, some good, some not so good;
All worth the money asked. Bug
ers, come and see stock, or write for
catalogues. yon will find what will
suit you. Sheet music, Books,
Strings, and all musical merchandise.
Remember name and place, -
SNEDEkER'S,
No. 5. North Warren St..
MASONIC TEMPLE, TRENTON, Nj.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11
An Immense shark.

While native fishermen were out fish
ing with nets OF Waialua, on the other
side of Oahu, monster shark got en-
tangled in one Of the nets and was
hauled ashore on the beach. Almost the
whole village went down and killed the
monster with axes. The shark meas
ured eighteen feet in length. When cut
up into pieces two good sized turtles,
one Of which was still living, were found
in the stomach. The turtles measured
eighteen inches across Other things Of
a varied nature were also found in the
stomach. The jawbones were brought
to Honolulu by the steamer G. r. Bishop
and placed on exhibition. The jaws
have seven rows Of teeth and measure
twenty-five inches when fully extended.
The natives stated that the mate of the
dead shark managed to escape.--Hono-
lulu Times
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11


What Is the reason ono hears in public
places the loud voices of women so much
ofteuer than mens
Women-these loud voiced ones--seem
to have the fancy that they cannot be
seen unless they are heard. And so they
can't-in their true character. Ifitwere
not that their words and laughter Hoated
out into space and above the hum of all
other voices they really might Mt some
time get mistaken for ladies. From
their looks no one would imagine for an
instant that they were common, i'll bred
and vulgar.
A quiet fash Of intelligence from their
eyes, accompanied by an appreciative
smile, would really convince an oniooker
that possibly IL was the forerunner of
the keenest wit. But no wit can ac-
company the loud guffaw that bursts
ont at the slightest proyocation; no wit
from the 5oisterous laughter, and no ap-
precistion Of wit in others. &C Chicago
Herald.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11
He was unduIx Anxious,

One of the most amusing distortions
of English that ever heard was perpe-
trated by waiter ON Grand Trunk
dining car, eager for his fee.
/ had ordered simple supper of lake
trout and buttered toast. Its meager APP
pearance seemed To- disturb my friend in
the white jacket.
''Aia't you goin' to have no other meat
besides that fish, sir?' he asked. Lewis
ton Journal.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11
one 81 worn.

Az . reugh estimate $4,000 young wo-
men were thrown out Of employment the
last Of the year from the retail dry goods
stores Of New York city. One firm alone
dismissed 100 women and girls and an
other 700. These unfortunate little mar
tyrs of commerce and circumstances
were for the most part extras" hired
In November and December for the holt
day trade at salaries that barely paid for
car fare, lunches and the, wear and tear
Of clothing. One manager, when APP
preached ON the subject, said: 81 was
ashamed to tell a girl who wanted an en-
gagement the wages, and so dismissed
her. II was less than her living would
cost. And yet, what can doP If wo-
men offer TO come here to clerk for fifty
cents day why should offer her SIP
The trouble is women do not proper.
ly value themselves. They are alone In
the world, dependent on their own en-
ergies; they want q chance, a footing, an
opening anything that viii enable q
! beginning. In their desperation they
viii work for almost nothing, and once
in position, have not the bravery to
assert themselves by properly valuing
their services. Time goes ON, tho star
walton wages are accepted, and not only
does the individual suffer. but tho whole
community of labor is affected by the
lower standard of resulting prices.
What the working girls of New Yori
need is less poetry. less kitchen garden,
ing, less pstheticism, less patronage,
and regular lecture on business tactics
She has no library, she does not take .
newspaper, and il she is to know hei
worth tho value of honest, earnest labol
and the relation her skill and industry
bear to capital. she must DO instructed
by sermon, speech or address. AS it is
she is cropping in the dark and growing
the plant Of experience for herself, bui
it is sad gardening, for there are thorni
instead OF fruit, and in the leaves |,
poison. New York World.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11
AN OLD riME INDIAN reRRoR.


An Aged Indian who for Ten Yeara Ter
rorizcd the Settlers of Arizona.
They were talking about Indian out
breaks when one of che party, who had
been for many years resident Of Arr
zona territory, remarked:
Itell you, gentlemen. that this Indian
business is pretty serious. Why, down
In Arizona we lived for fifteen years in
state of terror on account of maraud.
ing band Of Apaches that had things
pretty much their own way all this time,
in spite Of all the government troops
could do to keep them in check.
! call to mind particularly Old Vic
torio. There was a warrior for you. He
commanded band Of some 200 bucks.
They were the Chiracahua Apaches, and
the murders, robberies and depredations
committed by that band during those
ten years In which they were on the
warpath are almost incredible.
Old Victoria was nearly 90 years of
age when the troubles began. He ruled
those redskins with rod Of iron in
spite of his years. And he was para
lyzed, too, completely paralyzed. He
waa only able to use his left arm little,
just enough to lift cigarette to his
mouth
He was constantly in the saddle, and
had to be strapped on like a bale of
goods. His band had the finest ponies
to be found anywhere. They would
sometimes appear at one place, and in
less than twenty-four hours you would
hear of them some place 100 miles dis
tant. All throughout southern Arizona
and northern Mexico old Victoria con-
tinued his raids until the settlers finally
gave up in despair. The government
troops appeared to be utterly powerless
in the matter.
Why, that band of redskins would
sometimes plunder a wagon train right
under the noses of the troopers, and by
the time the latter were mounted and
ready to start in pursuit they would be
out of sight. The next day, perhaps, the
wires would tell of some fresh depreda-
ton committed by the same band in q
section Of the country over 100 miles
away.
This old war dog. however, was
finally rounded up and shot. He died in
the saddle, fighting to the last, and his
band, what was leftof it, dispersed. OF
course the settlers heard of it and were
delighted. Dismay followed, however,
when Cochise took tie field. This In
dian ran things pretty much the same
way for five years. and then came old
Geronimo. New York Herald.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11
writinr on nircI, Bark

A postoffice clerk Of sixty years ago
tells US that in those days it was COM
mon circumstance for men in the log
ging swamps in winter to write letters
to their friends on birch bark. They
took small quantity Of copperas with
them, and by stepping maple bark with
1t made q very good quality OF ink, and
used the quilts Of the partridge or crow
Cor psna Brunswick lMe.l Telegraph.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11
A weddlnr cake peaec,ed.

II had some wedding cake today un-
der very distressing circumstances, " said
postal clerk. "At the postoffice pack
age had been received containing heavy
invoice Of this style of fancy goods. II
was nearly six inches square and had
sixteen cents in postage stamps, but not
sign of an address. There was no help
for it. The owner couldn't DO found,
and rather than let the cake go to waste
it was distributed judiciously among q
few friends. OF course everybody was
sorry, but the state Of things might have
been worse. Buffalo Express.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11
A Dry sermon.

Bring your umbrella" called Mrs.
Brinkley to her husband, the other Sun
day, as she waited at the door for him
to go 10 church.
who's going to preachs' he called
back from upstairs.
"Our regular preacher"
sis that so? Well, I guess we won't
need an umbrella. Texas Siftings.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11
A DottIe,s Long voyage

Clement Wragge, the Ben Nevis me-
teorologist, threw overheard 100 well
corked bottle messengers during the pas
sage from Australia to England in 1875
Only six Of them were heard of after
ward. One was picked up at the entrance
Of Mobile bay, after having made cir
cult Of $500 miles in two years. 1t had
drifted from 81 dogs. north latitude, SO
degs. west longitude, through the Carib-
bean sea into the Gulf Of Mexico. Cham
bers' Journal.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1891-02-11
No nrains to sneak oE.

Dudley Canesuclzer went into res
taurant on Broadway and gave an order
for some fried calf's brains. After he
had waited almost half an hour. DUDLEY
said to the waiter:
'Well, what about the calls brainsy'
The waiter shook his head and init
mated that the outlook was gloomy.
Whats the matter with my brainsy'
"There amt any, that's all, /" replied the
waiter, looking at Dudley sadly. Texas
Siftinos.