Blue-grass blade., 1891-12-12

OF Danvllle credit tor the balance.
Yours
n. j. MCDANIEL.
Of course | believe in these cid
Elijah ravens. You remember
that Bro. Freeman said he liked
my paper, but he was poor and
could not pay me for it for a while,
aud that l must not send it until
he could pay for it, and said !
would send it anyhow and that
the "ravens" would bring me the
money for it; and sure enough the
next mail man named Wrenn-
another kind of bird except that
he does not know how to spell
his name as well as the other acren
does-seut me 500, and one was
for Bro. Freeman; and now Bro.
Mcdaniel wants to pay for it.
But let me tell you something
that beats either of these. a
poor widow woman dressed in
black came to me and paid me
81 90 for her own Blade and
wanted to pay for Bro. Freeman's.
Don't that 10 k like the 'ravens"
were getting in their work? You
better bet.
Now if about forty of you good
Christian people don't get mad,
and say | am trying to ruin the
Christian religion | will explain
that story about Elijah and the
ravens.
Elijah was nice old man. He
voted with the Prohibitionists and
hated the Democrats worse than
snakes, and the Republicans
couldn't fool him.
He was stumping the state for
good honest religion, and he got
strapped, and some poor man
named Raven, in Hebrew, like my
friend is named Wren in English,
or some poor woman dressed in
black, staked him-or rather
steaked him,-and gave him the
bread to go with the steak. It's
all poppycock about its being a
snonuf raven that flies around.
I've seen plenty of ravens in
Europe, and they are nothing in
the world but old kentucky
crows putting on foreign airs be-
cause the nabobs "much" them;
and you know these old crows are
the stingiest birds in the world
One of them would not give you
a cracker, if he owned a whole
bakery and you were starving to
death.
Now while | have got my hand
in | am going to tell you another
story about old Bro. Elijah. He
got off Il mighty good one on
those heathcis that were bullrag
ging him about his theology.
You reccollcct the heather were
Dragging on what their old
wooden gods could do. and Bro.
Lily bantcred them for "A trial.
Bro. Lily said to them that he
would build a pile of wood to bis
God, and the heathen should build
one to their gods, and they would
each put an offering on it and ask
his god to send down fire from
heaven 20 burn it up, and the man
whose pile Of wood was burnt up
was to have the belt. The hea-
then saw it was fair deal, aud
they could not back cut.
But Bro. Lijah had a good
scheme. lie told the heathen
that they might split up pine
goods boxes and stick in their
wood pile. and he would pour
water all over his, and his would
beat theirs burning. The heather
SAID 1t was Il go. 30 bro. lIiliill
made them stand over by their
own wood pile, and he brought
bucketiul after bucketlul and
poured all over his woodpiIe.
Then he ran his finger down in
his vest pocket ana pulled out a
match-he carried them to light
his pipe-scratched it on the seat
of his breeches, and stuck il to his
woodpiIe, and it flashed all over
before you conld hai your eye.
The heather just threw up the
sponge and said their old god was
a regular fake, and that Bro. Lily
was bully boy with glass eye.
You recollect that Bro. Lijah
guyed them, and told them their
god had taken his shotgun and