The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1891-05-22
MIR. BowsER's GYMNASIUM.
His Wife Tells of Numerous Mishaps
Trying to Beat the Doctor.

1
Trying to Beat the Doctor.
Large bundles, tied with ropes, cam,
up to the house the other evening, and
had not time to pry into the contents
when Mr. Bowser came in. waitet
until after supper and then asked:
Have you got new hobby, Mr.,
Bowser?"
hobby, new or old?"
You are regarded as man of hob.
bies."
II am, EN-? Then it is by few idiotsi
No man in the country is more clear OF
hobbies am often told that am tee
practical
"Well, what is in the bundle?"
"a doctors prescription-health, mus.
Gle, longevity. In other words, don't
propose to pay any more doctors bills.
why, you have wonderfully good
health, Mr.. Bowser."
And propose to keep it I haven't
been exercising enough. I have brought
home small outfit "
II think it is foolish and useless. You
are strong and healthy and you can
make no change for the better.
There you go! Always opposing
everything I do wouldn't have your
spirit for boat load of gold.
well, don't blame me, as usual
Blame you! AS usual2" Who ever
blamed your should be sorry to sus-
pect you of being light headed, but you
are acting very queer, Mrs. Bowser
No more was said, and he got out the
tools and lugged his bundle upstairs
and began fitting up gymnasium. In
about an hour he called me up He had
two weights at the end of two cords
running over a pulley, and as he worked
one and then the other he said:
This exercise strengthens the arms,
shoulders, and chest feel like new
man already. See those clubs?"
Yes"
well, those are Indian clubs. They
are more particularly for the arms
They are worked thus-and thus
and"
He was swinging them over his head,
and one fell upon his bald pate and he
sank down as limp as bag. tore off
his collar, ran and got water, and by and
by he sat up and asked:
What was doing?"
Exercising with the clubs knew
you'd do it
And when my back was turned you
hit me on the top of the head with a
hammer!"
"Of course not How can you be SO
foolish?"
He maintained an attitude of severity
toward me for about an hour, and then
slipped back upstairs to practice with
the dumb bells. slipped up after him,
pretending to hunt for an old coat, and
pretty soon asked him what particular
benefit he expected to derive from the
use of the bells.
Develop the arms and chest, of
course, he replied.
But you weigh 200 pounds now"
"Thats nothing to do with being
strong. It's muscle I'm after.
What for2"
"For fifty reasons Suppose should
be attacked by loafer?"
yes"
Suppose grab burglar here in the
house2"
YES"
Suppose a footpad should try to hold
me up?"
What would you do?"
Dor Do? Watch mel"
He began making vigorous motions
with 10 pound bell. and catastrophe
followed. He hit the wall with it, let
go his hold, and it fell upon his foot.
Then he yelled. And whooped. And
howled. And hobbled about, and said
he'd get even with me if it took a
thousand years
And you are blaming me, Mr..
Bowser?" / asked as found chance
to get in word. !
"Of course you're to blame!"
what did do?"
mo matter! I expected it from the
frst, but it's long road which has no
turn, Mrs Bowser! You just wait
I got him down stairs and rubbed his
foot with arnica, and after two or three
lays it was all right again. I think he
enjoyed being asked why he limped,
and think he told all inquirers that he
had just put up 80 pound bell when
he roof of the house gave way and
portion of the chimney fell upon his
DOT / heard him hammering away
Upstairs again, and 1 went up 10 ask
him what he was doing.
Arranging the bar, he replied.
what for?"
ITO exercise on.
why, Mr.. Bowser, you are not going
INTO practice again, are your"
Certainly. am not to be dismayed
y two or three slight accidents.
Il wish you would let it alone. You
re clumsy and awkward, and you will 4;
lurt yourself severely before you know
t.
Are you talking TO me?"
"Of course
Clumsy and awkward, eh2 That's
II right! Just what / might expect .
rom you! That's a reason, however,
TIy / should persist in this. ="
well, if you get hurt again don't ::
lame me. J