davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19
HOW DID YOU GET HERE2,,

"a Question Never Asked in Good 60
ciety.
IL is a rule of good society savs q
writer IN the Century, that as soon 90
you arrive you affect to have alvravs
been there. Of other ascents man
boast OF social success, rarely, Yonr
lni!ilonalre, for example-and million
larlSm IS getting so common as to he
Vuigar-your millionaire never tires Of
Ielilng you how he worked the multinli-
cation table until cents became dimes
ana dunes we'll sown blossomed pres
ently into dollars, till hundreds swelled
10 hundreds OF thousands, and the man
VINO had been blithe youth but twenty
years before became the possessor
OF an uneasy tumor he calls
a fortune. Once this narrative
is begun no matter that Won
beat your breast with reluctance to hear
out the tedious tale, while loud bas-
soons perctance are calling YOU to we'd
ding 1easts. Pray hear the modern
w hlttlngton with patience, good reader !
Inc recital OF hits story is his main con-
ISOLATION for the boredom of complicated
possession in which bis life is inextric-
ably lnyolved-his recoupment for the
lrksome vigilance with which he must
defend his hoard against the incessant
attacks OF cheats and beggars, subscrip-
ton papers and poor relations. But
the man who has won his way in that it,
luslve sphere we call society sends to
swift oblivion his processes. In society
no man asks another, GLOW did YOU get
here? ?" or congratulates him on moving
among better people than he did ten
years ago. Theoretically society in sta
tionary. Even while breathless from
climbing, the newcomer affects to have
ALWAYS been atom
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19
SHIL.. OTIS
'0NSU 7PETlON
CURE.

AHccess of this Great Cough Cure IS
1a parallel in the history of medicine.
|a1SgNtS are authorized to sell it on pos
qRnee, atcSt that no other cure can sue
;y stand. That it may become known,
0PHeors, at an enormous expense, are
"a Sample Bottle Free into every home
United States and Canada. If you have
y h' Sore Throat, or Bronchitis, use ii, for
cure YOU. If your child has the Group,
IA'Trg Cough, use it promptly, and relief
H If you dread that insidious disease
SEnDton, use it. Ask your Druggist for
-V4S CURE, Price 10 cts, 50 cts. and
,. Il your Lungs arc sore or Back lame,
&uohS Porous Plaster. Price IS cts.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19
Entitled to the Rest.

All are entitled to tie best that their
money will buy, so every family should
have, at once, q bottle of the best family
remedy, Syrup Of Figs, to cleanse the sys-
tenn when costive or bilious For sale in
SOC and $1.00 bottles by all leading drug
gistS.
CHAPPlE-"Dear girl, why do you keep
me constantly on the rack?' Jenny
II don't want to get you separated from
your hat. "-Harper's Ba@or
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19
Precious Stones in the United States.

some people think there are no
precious stones found in this country,
butltis mistake. Rock crystal, which
admits of such high polish, and which
is much used in jewelry now, is found
IN large quantities in North Carolina,
Virginia, Georgia, and Arkansas. There
is fine jet in Colorado. In Maine there
is mountain called Mount Mica, out of
which tourmalines to the value of
100000 year are taken. Moonstone
IS found in Virginia, and the soil of
New Mexico is enriched with sapphires,
rubies, and garnets.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19
A Real Balsam is Kemp's Balsam

The dictionary says: "a balsam is a
thich, pure aromatic substance flowing
from trees" Kemp's Balsam for the
Throat and Lungs is the only cough medi-
cine that is real balsam. Many thin.
watery cough remedies arc called balSams,
but such are not. Look through bottle
of Kemp's Balsam and notice what a pure,
thick preparation 1t is. If you cough use
Kemp's Balsam. Atall druggists. Large
bottles so cents and 81.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19
Beware of OintmentS for Catarrh
that Contain Mercury.

AS mercury will surely destroy the sense OF
smell and completely dera1ge the whole system
when entering it through the mucous surfaces.
Such articles should never be used except ON
prescriptions from reputable physicians, as the
damage they will do is tentold to the good you
can possibly derive from them Halls Catarrh
Cure. manufactured by F. J. Cheney & Co, To-
ledo, o., contains no mercury, and is taken in
ternally, and acts directly upon the blood and
mucous surfaces OF the system. In buying
Halls Catarrh Cure be sure You get the genuine.
1t is taken internally, and made in Toledo, o.,
by +. J. Cheney & Co.
N9 Sold by Druggists price -5c per bottle.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

NEEDY CL1ENr-"If lose my case I
don't see how you are to be paid. "
LaWyer-'O, don't worry about that,
my dear sir. The lawyer on the other
side is my partner. "-NeW York Ueeklu.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

srss a good deal Of
>,-sc business in the store
! 10 of to-day. It's TOO
I've. Or too reluctant.
/ be time it means moth
Words ouLy a00rIs.
! (; offer to refund the
! 4. or to pay a reward, is
Under the hope that you
want your money back,
hat you won't claim the
nd. Of course.
| whoever is honest in
he it, and works-not on
Tn reputation alone, but
! Oh the local dealer WHOM
know, must have some
! he has lal' Th ml h p"Cn oa
: a. Az oo'll ":4I
1nE S'@l'u " ye"A WILL
. ,.o,-; = oe
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

Mrs. BoND-'Did YOU tell Mrs. Jaw
smith that / was out, Norah ?'' Norah
Il did, num-" Mrs Bond-"Did she
say anything" Norah-"She said
Thank goodness mum" Nee York
Sun.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

THEY say truly, "The more servants the
less service" Save wages and gain service
by using SAPOLIO. 1t is a solid cake OF
Securing Soar. Try it.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

CRUEL. fashionable mothor! Why don't
YOU look after the welfare of your sickly
little child? The nurse hasn't sense enough
to get it box of DR.. Bulls Worm De-
stroyers. By mail. Is cents. John d.
Park, Cincinnati, Ohio.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

Dobbins' Electric Soap, pales into 4lothing-
ness before the story it will tell you itself,
of it's own perfect quality, If you will give
it one trial. Don't take imitation. There
are lots of them.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

THE ENTIRE BOOK is ably written, anG
gives trusty information for everyone
growing fruit OF any SORT or kind. Sent
free by Stark Bros. Louisiana, Mo-
Orange Judd Farmer.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

THE professional instinct is not q
thing to be easily suppressed. The
Chicago dentists extracted corks at their
banquet. CHICAGO NeuS.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19
BEEcHAM's PILLS cure Bilious and Nervous Ills.

LAWYER BRIEF-"Will you try one OF
my cigarettes, Judge 2" Judge-tWhat
do you want me to try it for murder %
I0nkcrs Statesman.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

COUGHS AND HOARSENESS.- The
irritation which induces coughing imme-
dlately relieved by use of "ByU'Clts Bron-
chat TrOcheS." Sold only in boxes.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

THE only certain way to Judge mans
position in society by his dress is when
you see him in the penitentiary garb.-
Terds .SiftinoS.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

CALL BoY-"Mephistopheles says he
won't go on without glass of grog, sir.
He's all Of shake" Manager-"W ell,
give the devil his dew. '-Judqe.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

GREEN-"How was it the fox hunt
turned out a failure ?' White-"The
fox struck; said he wouldn't run with
non-uniOp dogs .N-MnnseN's WeekLu.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

p,R,DoxrcAD.-Daggett-''Gregory is Is
AH go isn't he % Cutting-"i don
very CIV fiat can be. He's always been
T nyetty well otf!'-Amertcan Grocer
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

F1TS.-All Fits stopped free by DIR. NIine's
Great Nerve Resttrer. Motifs after first DAYS use
Marvellous cures Treatise and So trial bottle free
Fit eases Send to DF. Kline, GGl Arch St Phla..
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

THE tired street car horse best knows
1.-THE luxury Of whoa. - Washington
Star.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19
Esta blished 1853.

Dresses, Gents Clothing, Feathers, Gloves,
etc, Dyed or Cleaned, Plush Garments
Steamed at Otto Pietch's Dye Works, 246 w.
Water ST., Milwaukee. Send for Circular
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

,..ndcrstand it," said the in
''.l DDr ran see for yourself by the
. .5nJ the written descriptions
gam :.sbin idea ought to prove inn
=. aiI nrr,aLrtical." Yes" replied
~ ,:,t "jt is another instance
ID. D.'9 ncn is mightier than the
|D.IIashiagioa Post.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

The best cough medicine is Piso's Cure
for Consumption. Sold everywhere. Csc
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19

NEVER do to-day what some one else
will do for you to-morrow.-IeraS SJt-
inqs.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19
a GRAND INVESTMENT
NEW DuSCOVERY.

NEW DISCOVERY.
u IDD'S GERM ERADICATION. Positively Cures
IN All Diseases =! Because it kills oil Germsr Bacte
ria Parasites, Microbes and Animacul8 in the system,
which the prominent physicians in convention agreed
the of all disease. The air. water, vegetables
and fruit are full OF these impeISepbe to TIE makes
betes and Brighs disease cancers tnmors, and all So
called nCurabe diseases. (Never known fail tocure
consumption catarrh, kidney troubles and syphilis
ReIuled 81 ~ ?nd ~ Sizes anywhere receipt or
others dangerous countcrfeits. Sold in Milwaukee,
by druggists Hunter Drug Co.. IL Grand Avenue,
Wholesale and retail.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19
August.
Flower
For Dyspepsia.

For Dyspepsia.
A. Bellanger, Propr., Stove Foun-
dry, Montagny, Quebec, writes: II
have used August Flower tor Dys-
pepsia. It gave me great relief. I
recommend it to ali Dyspeptics as q
very good remedy"
Ed. Bergeron, General Dealer.
Lauzon, Lewis, Quebec, writes: II
have used August Flower with the,
best possible results for Dyspepsia. -
c. A. Darlington, Engineer and
General Smith, Sydney, Australia,
writes: August Flower has effected
a complete cure in my case. 1t act
ed like a miracle"
Geo. Gates, Corinth, Miss. writes:
81 consider your August Flower the
best remedy in the world for Dys-
pepsia. I was almost dead with
that disease, but used several bottles
of August Flower, and now con-
slider myself a we'll man. | sincerely
recommend this medicine to suffer
ing humanity the world over. "a
G. G. GREEN, Sole Manufacturer,
Woodbury., New Jersey, U. 5. A.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-02-19
,d Sour Milk.

tcrl'''' ms, +bnndn,
sojns ,e0r.eived q scientific ex-
! ii ns .b [s' hands Of an Italian t !
h 4, To T5'ooIomei. He has found
''Pn i:,1c Of an electric e rl current rr
+ p .assG6 milk, so far from n SOY sour r
ar;, until the sixth or n, ninth
5.e1 . no" the surface Of fl. milk X it
u @ss' sour, and this the Proe :
.,oI !Sntes to the generation or
Gri2'tibve9 sollring is more rapid
5e {, an1b[Saracd explosively, more
sdI'rpr' rated by the former
.s1s latte EATER method; The fact
ID, a,ing OF milk can be retarded
.o Iaa procedure as the PASSAGE
9P, .,;r current may prove OF
.oI .rno and offer q safer way OF
y'. milk than by the use of
p DL.Saniuv Nclcs.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1891-06-15
DON'T BE A LOAFER.

Young man, hold on momeno ana
be spoken to. Rob your parents Of all
they have worked to save to leave
YOU after they are dead. Steal horses
from q deacon or mules from farmer
who is in debt Tell a one armed
constructive man to his face that he is
a liar. Steal all the sugar from a
house where they are cooking pie
plant. Put tar in the bottom OF
hens nest so the meditative hen
cannot turn her eggs. Drive nails in
the boot heels of friends while they
are asleep, so they will prick then
soles when they put on their Shoes
Soak the ends of matches in vinegar
so they will not ignite. Smoke ciga-
rettes and be a loafer. Borrow small
sums of money and never repay 1t
Start all the lies you eau think OF
against the girls and women of YOU
acquaintance. Wear yonr hair long
and 90 with your ears dirty if you will
but don't do the meanest of all thing:
stand at the door of school-houst
or a church waiting for your girl tx
/ come out, so you can spear her ant
lug her away as goes dog with ;
stolen bone. If you have no respec
for a girl, leave her alone. If yo'
have, dig the dirt from under you
finger nails, wash your face and hands
call for her, escort her to meeting, pa.
her proper attention and walk hom
with her like a gentleman. But don't
be a loafer.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1891-06-15
A socialistio commonwealth.

The Australians are state socialists,
and although their new constitution
proposes to recognize the independence
of the states in far higher degree than
that in which it has been allowed to
exist in Canada, yet it vests the virtual
control of the whole railway system OF
Australia in the federal power, which
will be a shock to your American minds,
whether north or south of the Canadian
border line.
The great majority of Australians
have confidence in the power OF the
state to do much for the people, and IN
the wisdom of its exercising this power.
You in the United States, the Cana
| dams across their border the CONT
mental governments, are far behind
even old England in this respect, and
| it would be of advantage to the world
that Australia, which is much before
US all. should have the opportunity OF
putting its doctrines into practice upon
the largest scale. Sir Charles Dixie IL
! Forum
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1891-06-15
ssee-Yes, | have bought one


One of the best fish stories told since
the opening Of the trout season is now
going through the corridors of the lead
inc hotels 1t comes from Thomas
Canary, the theatrical manager, and is
being vouched for by Louis Robe.
Mr. Canary spent the winter at st.
Augustine, Fla, and returned to the
CITY the other day. While in the south
the genial Thomas took daily strolls
along the beach to get an appetite for
dinner.
One day he noticed q little colored
boy lying upon his stomach along the
bank of the river, with his eyes fixed
upon the water He watched the little
fellow for fully fifteen minutes, but not
a muscle of his body moved. A few
minutes later he saw the boy make a
plunge toward the surface of the water,
and when he appeared again he held
in his hand a good sized trout.
Tom thought that this was such an
unusual thing that he offered the boy
five cents for every trout he caught
that afternoon. Thomas sat on the
beach and watched the operation. The
| boy caught the trout SO fast that Tom,
| fearing that he would be banErupted,
compromised with the lad. He de
clares that his curiosity was pretty ex
pensive
1t is rather a common thing to SEE
trout charming along the banks of the
southern waters The temperature il
so mild and the water so clear that one
cal walk along the beach and see the
fish jump almost a foot above the sur
face of the water.-New York Tele
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1891-06-15
ENJOY LIFE NOW.

Too many of us are looking forward
to happiness in the future years IN
stead of getting all the enjoyment pos
sible out of the present. 1t IS well TO
remember that the time never Will
come in this world when ws shall nave
everything we want, just where we
want it. The only way to be happy Is
to enjoy all we have to the utmost as
we 90 along. 1t is right to lay up Tor
old age in youth, right to prepare for
a rainy day, but it is not right to bend
all our energies to this end, ana put
off until the future the happiness we
may enjoy every day. 1t is far too
common to see people working and
saving denying themselves all recrea-
ton and many comforts, to lay up
money and buy more land, to build
larger and finer house, or to save for
their children, thinking that then they
will be happy and then begin to take
comfort. The hoped for point may
never be obtained, or, if it is, sickness
or death may come first, and the dear
ones whom we expected to be happy
with may be gone forever.
How much better to use some OF the
good things of life as we go along
make our humble homes as cheery
and bright as possible now, instead OF
waiting for a better house! Don't
starve to-day either body, mind OF
soul. thinking that you will riot to-
morrow. Don't hoard and scrimE
through all the best years of your life
that you may be generous IN you
wills. Life is uncertain, and it is bet
ter to make your children happy while
they are under the home roof-to cal
to that home every energy that VII
make their lives sweeter and better
than to deny them these that you may
leave them a larger bank account Whel
You are gone.
DON'T keep the parlor shut up an(
live in the kitchen, unless you wan
the boys and girls to leave you. Tax
time to read, to rest, and to enjoy tn
society of friends. Especially TAX
time to enjoy the companionshlp o
your children. 1t will only be fey
wears at best that they will be Wit
you, and these ought to be years G
happiness to both you and them. /
we are ever happy in this life we mus
enjoy what every day brings US. W
must be grateful and glad for all tn
good which comes into our lives, an
patiently bear our trials, belleVln
that all, if rightly used, will fit us &c
the enjoyment of perfect happlnes
hereafter.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1891-06-15

have got to have pond of water and
children running about kareless, or
else the dog amt profitable.
There amt nothing made boarding
a Nufoundland dog. Rat terriers are
useful to ketch rats; butth rats amt
profitable after you have ketched
them. The shepherd dog is useless to
drive sheep; but if you have to go and
buy a flock of sheep, and pay more
than they are with. jest tew keep the
dog buzzy, the dog amt profitable-not
much. Lap dogs are very useful; but
if YOU don't hold them in your lap awl
the time, they amt profitable atal.
The coach dog is one of the most use
full Nv dogs 1 know Nv; but you have
got to have a coach (and that amt al
ways PLEASANT, or you can't reallze
from the dog. Thus we see that, while
dogs are generally useful, there are
times when they amt generally profit
ableD
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1891-06-15
COMFORT FOR HOMELY GIRLS.

"HoW did that homely woman con-
trive to get married." is not unfre-
ouently remarked of some good do
nestle creature whom her husband re-
CARDS as the apple of his eye, and IN
whose plain face he sees something
better than beauty.
Pretty girls who are vain of their
charms are rather prone to make OBJ
servations of this kind, and conscious
ness of the fact that flowers of lowell
ness are often left to pine on the stem,
while weeds of LONELINESS go off read
ilv, is, no doubt, in many cases at the
bottom of the sneering question.
The truth is that most men prefer
LONELINESS and amiability to beauty
and caprice, exclaims writer IN the
New York Ledger. Handsome women
are sometimes very hard to please.
They are apt to over-value themselves,
and. in waiting for an immense bid,
are occasionally cleft on the market"
The plain sisters, on the contrary,
aware of their personal deficiencies,
generally lay themselves out to pro-
duce an agreeable impression, and in
most instances succeed. They don't
aspire to capture paragons with
princely fortunes, but are willing to
take anything respectable and love-
worthy that Providence may throw in
| their way.
| The rock ahead of your naughty Jul
nos and coquettish Hebes is fastidious.
They reject and reject until nobody
cares to WOO them. Men don't like to
be snubbed nor to be trifed with-a
lesson that thousands of pretty women
learn too late. Mrs. Hannah More, a
very excellent and pious woman, who
knew whereof she wrote, recommends
every unmarried sister to accept the
first good, sensible, Christian lover
who falls in her way. But ladies whose
mirrors, aided by the glamour of van
ity, assure them they were born fol
conquest, pay no heed to this sort o
advice.
1t is noteworthy fact that homely
girls generally get better husband
than fall to the lot of their fairer SIS
tiers. Men who are caught merely b.
a pretty face and figure do not, as
rule. amount to much. The practical
useful, thoughtful portion of mankln'
is wisely content with unpretendln3
excellence.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1891-06-15
BeclOuded.

Nv Grandfather Good, pious, old soul,
who had stood for the truth all his life,
loved the pipe that he smoked,I think on the
whole,
Almost as he did his dear wife.
One night. as he slept, he had a queer dream
Experience quite frequent of late;
He Thought that he died, crossed over the
stream
And stood by the Beautiful Gate"
In replv to his knock, good St. Peter looked
out,
And lust a little to try him,
He sternly demanded what the noise was
about,
And made as if he should deny him.
..Good Sir and Kind Friend,' this disciple be-
gan,
1--WE lived. in a world full of sin,
4 true, Christian life; I've loved God and man.
And want very much to come in!'
..PIease. what was your name" was St Peter $
retort,
I'm the world where SHINING is rifeF'
..Jehoikim Good, or AKIN Tor snort;
It's down in the Lambs Book of Life"
The Saint went away, but soon re-appeared'
And said that the name was not there;
He felt very sorry, but he very much feared
That he could not give heed 10 MS Prayei'
The old man replied: cit surely must be
Recorded in letters of gold;
For always I've fed on the fruit OF the tree
Which stood where the crystal tide rolled
VERY weIl"' said the Saint, 'I'l seek 1t once
more,
For your nOmen might OVERLOOK
But he was not gone long, and said, as before
1T surely is not in the Book"
The old Christian wept in piteous way;
He said he could not bear the loss;
He'd obeyed the command to watch and to
pray,
And chung, all his life, to the Cross.
The Saint was much moved at his tears falling
fast,
Went through the list slowly, then spoke
s'Ah, yes, my good friend, I've found II at iasU
B,,t tbs all covered oUer lCith smoke!"