The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1891-11-18
A LETTER TO BILL NYE.
Two Minds That Ruu as One on the Dead
Beat Question.

| Dedt question
My Dear William:
| trust you will pardon the seemingly
gross and unwarranted familiarity in sd.
dressing you in the above terms, as | have
never seen you, nor the production of your
great DRAMA" though, if you resemble
your portraits in THE SALT LAKE HERALD
and other great daily newspapers, I fancy
might recog nize you should we meet
Many years ago | knew a girl blessed
with your surname. She was not what
the world would call a beauty, having n
thick, tawny skin, coarse, straight. black
nalr, and was cross-eyed, and her under
Jaw was built on the plan of bull .doe's.
Sne was not belle at social parties. Tor
sne couldn't dance nor play the piano nor
even sing Way Down Upon the Swanes
river" but she was square and honest.
ana thought more of other peoples com
Tort than her own, and when any of the
neighoors were sick or needed help she
was on hand. She had motherly love for
other peoples children. Though
she never had beau she helped other girls
prepare their wedding outfits, and after
tney had once married she congratulated
Lhem on their happiness with as much ap
parent pleasure as il the wedding had beeu
her own.
PERSONS who were stran gers to her would
sonetilnes remark that her LONELINESS
would cause timepieca to Quit work and
used to pity the inconsistency between her
lace and character; but like everyone else
VINO Knew her well, l admired and rsspected
ana almost loved her.
also once knew noble and distineuIshed
FAMILY OF your name, whose ancestors set
ueo IN ONO at an early date. and they
could trace their lineage back seventv-lve
OF elgnty years without finding any rascal
tly recorded against it: How it may have
been previous to that l do not know. but I
mink they had noble blood in their veins.
AT least one of their ancestors was chased
oy the Indians, and If they had caught him
they would probably have scalped him
But the Old man was long legged, and his
Wlno was good, SO he reached home earlier
IMAM was expected, and saved his topknot
ana kept the family escutcheon from being
dlshgured by scalping knife. However,
1t Is not on account OF these nohla cbor
acterlstlcs OF people bearing your name
mat L addressed you as "My Dear VII
liam y" II
1t is the just and merited criticism Of the
Ialented Dead Beat Family, ia your letter
puonsned In The SALT LAKE SUNDAY HER-
AID, ana the other great metropolitan
ealiy newspapers, October u, 1891, that
g SuoEu III my leart.
My own chfldlike confidence. and trust
IN human nature, has been dwarfed and
tnWarIeu DY running up against so MANY
hish-toEed gentlemen" who have bor
roWed my money "for day or two" or
have sought other favors and have appsr.
entity forgotten my existence forever afrer.
ward. If the breed of the people who want
and expect something for nothing from
ot1er people could ell be beheaded, it would
reduce the population of the United states
very considerably, but the world would be
better off for the loss. When reach ~ nc
York intend to look you up and ask Won
to take somethin'n as measure of fra
ternal sentiment on the Dead Beat ones
ton, and, if have not sufficiently apolo
Rized Tor calling you by endearine terms
already, I'll "set 'em up" aga n.
JoMTLToN.
SALT LAKE CITY, November II, 1891.