The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-01-23

what do you wantT' asked MIR. Mad
dox fiercely. Don't you see l am en-
gagged"
"Oh, 1 know" said Guy, 'what you
are about to 60! Don't think that am
going to interference at all. But be-
fors you make your quietus wish to
ask YOU few questions. Have you pro-
vided for your niece's future welfare:"
whats that to your
considerable. / am about to marry
Miss Silver; so her interests are natural
ly mine"
"Then she is provided for-amply."
THANK you for your information.
Very glad to hear it. And now excuse
the apparent impertinence of the ques-
ton, but where is your will?'
Here" said Mr.. Maddox, laying his
hand on it.
Suppose you give it to me to take
care Of"
"Give it you'll Why, pray?'
ut might become misplaced" ex-
planned Guy.
I'm keep it myself" said Mr.. Mad
dox roughly.
Then just leave a memorandum on
the table, said Guy earnestly, ''to
tell where it is. 1t will save trouble,
perhaps"
Get outr' cried Mr. Maddox angrily.
"Ah. / see!" said Mr.. Cheevers coolly;
Gin hurry to begin. Well, won't de-
tain you; but have little suggestion
TO offer"
"Well?" said Mr.. Maddox impatiently.
"It is this" said Guy. Miss Silver
informs me that you have made several
previous efforts to cut short your trouble
and your breath, and always unsuccess-
fully. Now it seems to me you don't go
the right way about it. This box" and
here he opened the box before alluded
to, contains several little plans that l
think might please you. Here's one,"
and he showed little steel instrument.
Whats that" asked Mr.. Maddox Gu
riously.
This" said Guy, sis an article that
YOU can place round your neck like
collar, then, by striking your hand on
the left side of your neck, sharp spike
is driven right into your jugular
VEIN
But that would kill me?' said Mr..
Maddox, staring.
"Well, amt that what you WANT"
demanded Guy sternly. ''NOw, here's
another" he went on. Here's wheel,
you observe; you place this band round
your neck, pass it round the wheel and
give it two or three turns-then let go.
The recoil will twist your head almost
off your shoulders-kill you to a GER
tainty."
Mr.. Maddox stared at him with IN
feigned horror.
Then" went on Guy coolly, "here's
a little package, a torpedo. 1t contains
nitro-glycerine. You place it in your
mouth, snap your teeth on it, and off
goes your head, smashed into millions
of atoms"
Good heavens!" exclaimed Mr. Mad
dox fearfully. What terrible ideal'
Not at ALL" said Guy soothingiy.
Beautiful invention-I quite pride my
self on it-scientihc suicide, you seel
Anybody can take poison or blow their
brains out, but to do it scientifically re-
quires real talent. You have it, and
am confident that you will reflect credit
on my inventive skill. Now" he con-
tinued confidently, IF you could use all
three of these inventions at once-cut
your jugular, garrote yourself and blow
your head off, all at once-why, I'd thank
you"
"Whatr' cried Mr.. Maddox fiercely,
edo you think I'm crazy? Do you think
I'm going to use any of your internal
inventions? Get out of this room, you
cold blooded villain, before throw you
out of the window
But have great many more to
show you" demonstrated Guy, land you
see want you to try as many as posi-
ble Well, well!' he added, as Mr.. Mad
dox grasped the poker threateningly,
I'm going But I'll leave this box here.
and before you get rid of yourself Just
make a memorandum of what you will
use and leave it on the table, because
you know there will probably be moth
ing left of you to draw conclusions from,
and so"-
Here any further speech was cut short
by Mr.. Maddox Selling his visitor and
hustling him out into the passage.
"Well?' said Lizzie, anxiously, to
Guy.
II think it's all right" said Guy, grin
ming. Get the lunch ready. Your
uncle is all right He'll be down"
And sure enough. so he was, and
though he spoke not he ate most vora-
ciously of everything.
Lizzie" said he suddenly, after an
hours pause, did you ever see an infer
nal old fool and an idiot"
Never that l know Of" said Lizzie.
Why
Because just look at me and you'll see
one" said Mr.. Maddox grimly, and he
stalked upstairs.
Up TO the present time of writing Mr..
Cyrus Maddox is still alive, enjoying re-
markedly good health, and he seems to
be on friendly terms with Mr.. Cheevers
and his wife Lizzie. He probably for
gave that gentleman on account Gf dis
covery that he made that the nitro-gly-
cer1ne torpedo contained nothing more
dangerous than salt, and the other in
fernal inventions" were infe. nal in about
the same ratio, but Guy still maintains
that when persons are weary of life they
should end their troubles by scientific
suicide.-Boston Globe.
Beware of Them.
There are no less than 1900 little in
cidentS' about Stanley going the rounds
of the papers, and at least 1899 of them