San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1891-10-19
FEMALE WINE AGENTS.

How Some Society Women Manage
to Put Money in Their Purses.
Philadelphia Press.
"Othello's occupations gone" muir
INJURED a sad.eyed youth who sat Oh
the piazza of the Newport Casino, in
the moonlight, drinking glass o.
wine. A sympathetic friend sleepily
inquired what was the matter.
why" went Oh the first speaker
"unless We fellows have pretty wives
or sisters to act as our assistants, we
can't get positions any more as cham.
payne agents. You know well enough
that the one thing a hard-up gentle
man can DO without loss of dignity is
10 become agent for champagne
house. | made very tidy little sum
last summer by recommending the
- brand 10 all my acquaint.
auces."
A little while ago / was informed
by the firm that my services would
no longer be required. Afterward |
found out that chaps having direct
control over pretty women were now
es. The idea is great one, L am
willing to confess, but it lets me down
very hard, for / am a bachelor and
haven't a woman i'm my household.
But see how we'll the thing works.
Suppose a fashionable woman, who
is constantly entertaining and be.
ing entertained, always express
es herself as preferring car
tain brand of wine. Immediately
JnaG bland OF wine Obtains favor with
the people that are admirers of her
taste. The champagne people have
suddenly realized Inis, ana their
principal agents now are women.
iney nave them In society, and in
Bohemian circles, and are making
play get to the leading actresses of
the country. You see how sound the
plan is, because woman can always
declare her preference for wine, and
the men entertaining her must supply
the Bind she wants. But Pm simply
out of 1t on the new deal, and, con-
found it, Pm awfully short this sum-
mer.n
We'll, why don't you marry and
make all assistant of your wife?"
asked the friend.
81 never thought of that" was the
reply. perhaps that wouldn't be
bad idea, now. I'll think 1t over"
MeteorOlosists and the Winter
From Galignani.
Meteorologists are like doctors, in
asmuch as il is difficult to decide be-
tween them when they disagree. A
q % ha
wise came 10 the conclusion that the
coming winter is to he even more Sc.
we're than the last one. They
based mis- theory on various
grounds, among other reasons ad-
duced being, first, that the stOrks in
Holland had unanimously agreed not
to extend their return tickets, but to
leave for the south at the earliest mo-
ment; secondly, that the holly, ivy
and other hard berried trees showed
that nature had provided a large
e,Ure OF foot for the birds; and, third
1y, that We had an exceptional plum
year, and there is always some occult
connection between frost and stone
fruit, with many other reasons which,
doubtless appear valid TO the per-
son who discovers them. To them
another class of meteorological
which we may call the Optimist
school-replies that if the strokes are
leaving very early the swifts are stay
ing preternaturally late, and swift
10 quite as likely to be right as a
stork, any way, and that this Sep.
tember has been the warmest known
since 1854, the winter of which wear
was one of the mildest on record; with
other cogent reasons TO prove their
case. 1t is obviously difficult to tell
which of these two doctrines is right.
Nature is rldicuiOusly wasteiul, as
she may have caused q glut
in the stone fruit and berry
market without any after.iutentiOn.
1t would be impossible for any bird to
be as wise as stOrk looks, but ap.
pearances are deceptive, aud the
swift, though much smaller biped
Is more experienced traveller, and
keeps a pretty good grip on the
handful of things he Knows" On the
other hand, September has not KEPT
up the reputation it commenced with
and snow Is reported to have fallen
not only on Pilatus and the Rigi
but also at Annecy, which rather
looks as though the pessimist t.
were right in their prognCstica
tions. Perhaps, on the whole, i
would be better if both classes obey
ed the wise apOthegm which al
American millionaire is said to have
invented. and never prOphesied un
less they knew. Weather report
are only another form Of statistics
and statistics, as every body knows
NAV be made To fell wbipbayar W a,
the statistician chooses. In meteor
o!Ogy it is bad rule tina
won't work both ways, as Con
fGcius Is said to have remarker
when he tried to double up a 2-foo