davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Roanoke times. [volume] (Roanoke, Va.) 1890-1895, 1891-08-23
WASHINGTON AND LEE

University, Lexington, Va. Academic;
Law; Engineering. For Catalogue ad-
dress, e. w. c. LEE, President.
LAW SCHOOL
Washington and Lee University, Lex
ington, Va, C. A. Graves, Prof. Com.
and Stat. Law. j. Randolph Tucker,
Prof. Equity and Constr Law, etc. Opens
Sept. 10. For Catalogue address,
aug13-1m q. w. c. LEE, President
The Roanoke times. [volume] (Roanoke, Va.) 1890-1895, 1891-08-23

Advertising rates made known on applica
The Roanoke times. [volume] (Roanoke, Va.) 1890-1895, 1891-08-23
THE ROANOKE TIMES.
TELEPHONE NUMBER 1ai.

THE TINES is delivered in Roanoke, Salem and
Vinton every morning by carriers for 80 cents per
month.
The Roanoke times. [volume] (Roanoke, Va.) 1890-1895, 1891-08-23
THE WEEKLY TIMES.


THB WBBKLY TINES, containing the news OF
the week in more condensed form. one year,
ft00 In advance
The Roanoke times. [volume] (Roanoke, Va.) 1890-1895, 1891-08-23

Items OF news, communications, etc. should
be addressed to the Editor OF THE TIMES.
tered letter. check, or draft, should he addressed
and made payable 10
The Roanoke times. [volume] (Roanoke, Va.) 1890-1895, 1891-08-23

Roanoke, Virginia.
The record-union., 1891-07-20

stood looking at each other for some time
and then suddenly the second fox at
tackled the other most furiously, as though
enraged by having trick played upon
him.
In the Island of Ceylon the people are
very fond of elephant-hunting. They be-
gin by clearing an open space near forest,
part of which is strongly fenced in with
trunks of trees, with open places for
doors. This is called a corral. When so
much of the work is done the natives get
behind and around the elephants with
blazing torches, shaking spears and rat
Ting all kinds of noisy instruments in
order to frighten the huge animals, while
all the time driving them toward the
open doors of the corral. At last with a
rush the great herd enter, the entrances
are barred, and the poor giants of the
woods find themselves hopelessly i'm
prisoned. An elephants rage is dreadful
to witness, but the ingenuity of man has
found q way of subduing it. One by one
each prisoner is freed again, and tame
elephants, remarkable for their sagacity,
come up to him, stroke him with their
trunks, and otherwise cajole him until
they lead him on to a good, strong tree.
The natives creep up behind, and in a
minute a rope with a running knot is
round the elephants leg and made fast to
a tree. All the time this is going on the
tame elephants are humorIng their de-
luded victim, but as soon as he is secured
they go away and leave him, which is a
shabby trick. Then the men bring him
nice cocoanuts and leaves to eat, which,
of course, he refuses, as he is again in a
great passion and struggling to be free.
But hunger subdues even the tiercest,
and at last his wild roaring ceases to re-
sound through the woods, and he is
forced to eat. From that time the tanning
process is comparatively easy; again and
again he is fed, as he requires it, by a
kind hand; and the elephant, suscepti BILE
to kindness, becomes at last a docile serv-
of man
The record-union., 1891-07-20
A VERY OLD TRICK.
But 1t Was New to the Green Spanish
HOteI- I-Keener.

There are still places in Spain which,
although comparatively intelligent and
thicllly inhabited, are yet centuries be-
hind knowledge Of some of the wicked
ways Of the world. A recent occurrence
in a community not a thousand miles
from Madrid makes this observation
striklngly true.
A citizen of that city, who might have
been the counterpart of a stranded
actor in our own land, found
himself penniless in certain
town, writes a PHILADELPHIA Times CORE
spondent. He entered the best hotel the
place possessed and demanded a good
room with a good supper. Both were
provided. The fornalities il vogue in
America with strange guests as to bag
gage, etc, were scarcely known here, or
at least not put in practice in this par
ticular instance.
After supper the guest slept the sleep,
if not of the just, at least q very good ar
ticle of imitation. But ut the dawn of
morning he raised the whole household
with his angry shouts. On the landlords S
rushing to his room in hot haste he de-
manded to know who had entered his
room and stolen his pantaloons.
The landlord went pale. Feebly look
ing around he noticed the garment was
missing.
81 had them on when 1 came in" said
lIlS
''You can't deny that. What's become
of them?''
The landlord gave orders for thor
ough search of the establishment inside
and out. The one or two servants were
closely questioned. Nothing was learned
of the missing leg-wear.
In despair he returned to his infuriated
guest.
Not to be found, sir"
Not to be found? Come, come, that
story won't do! | want my pantaloons
and the purse, with $50 it contained
Otherwise, sir, Tll blazon the robbery to
the world.'
This would never do, so, after much
persuasion, the landlord induced him to
accept pair of his own and half the sum
alleged to have been lost. Fuming, and
apparently only half content, the traveller
after breakfast proceeded toward the cap
ital.
AT the beginning of the following cold
season the landlady's chimney wouldn't
draw. An Investigation was made and
from the 1ue was dragged pair of old
breeches with nothing in the pockets.
About the same time a noted gymnast
and pantomimist was amusing large
audiences in nearby towns with new
act the principal feat of which was where
the hero climbs dexterously onto roof,
drops his pantaloons down chimney
and then tricks the innkeeper, as was
done in the story.
The record-union., 1891-07-20
HE DIDN'T WANT SOAP
The Farmer Had Opinions of His Ow
and Enforced Them.

w
and Enforced Them.
"You can either beat farmer as slick
as grease or you can't beat him at all !"
said the patent hay-fork man as we were
talking about his adventures in the rural
regions. THAT is, he is either gullible or
oyer-suSplclOus. Some will refuse a
good thing and some will snap at swim
die. l think l can illustrate my deciara-
tions right here, or at least one of them.
The man in the seat over there is a
farmer"
Il should say so.'
And he's one of the sort who suspects
every stranger Watch me try him"
he took cake of toilet soap from his
satchel, and, going over to the farmer,
saluted him in a pleasant manner, and
added:
81 have new make of soap here which
L am introducing to the public. 1t is
worth fifteen cents q cake, but make the
price only tive.'
Don't want it." was the gruff reply.
with every cake goes a S5-greenback,
a gold bracelet, the deed of a town lot in
Kansas, a pocket-knife, pair OF eye
glasses and solid gold ring.''
Don't want 'em, STRIP
''As l want your opinion of the soap /
Will give it to you"
Il won't take itt"
But, sir, i'll order to introduce it into
your neighborhood l will give you 100
cakes free, and at the same time leave five
watches and five deeds to town lots.'
"Look-a-here ~ shouted the farmer as
he jumped up and spat on his hands,
You go away from me or IN smash
you! Pm on to your tricks, old man,
and if you think you have picked up a
haySeed you are barking up the wrong
tree"
And the hayfork man had to move
lively to escape the blow leveled at his
nose.
The record-union., 1891-07-20
Care of the Ewes.

Never read in a poor or dim light, or
with the light shining into the eye. The
light should come from behind or the
side, and thoroughly illuminate the
object looked at. 1t is bad habit to read
lying down or with the head bent over
an object. This is the more common
cause of nearsightedness. When the
eyes begin to pain from use, if rest does
not give relief, seek the advice Of an
oculist. Avoid reading in railway trains
and omnibuses. 1t requires too great
exertion of the accommodatiEe power to
keep the eyes accurately focused and
fixed on the letters. Do not read much
during convalescence and illness. Take
plenty Of sleep. Sleep is a sovereign
balm for weak sight Bright gaslight in
crowded rooms and the impurity of air
in such places are especially to be
avoided. Foreign bodies, if not washed
out by increased flow of tears, should be
removed by an oculist. Eyestones are
useless and smart neighbors worse than
useless where hard particles are embed
ded in the transparent surface OF the eye.
II lime or other destructive alkalis get in
the eye, wash the eye thoroughly with a
weak solution of vinegar and water,
followed by pure vaseline or sweet oil.
The record-union., 1891-07-20
TOO INDULGENT BY FAR.
The Irrepressible Small Boy, the KIND
Parent and the New Minister,

''Yes," said Mr.. Easyman to Rev. DR..
Prudent, the new minister, who was pay
ing his pariShioner friendly visit, "you
are unquestionably right. | do not be-
lleye IN being over stern with children.
Now mine treat me as they would an
elder brother or playmate. No scamper-
ing upstairs when they hear my latch
key turn in the door. Not much. Make
your home cheerful-that's my motto"
A frowsy-haired youth of some six
summers appeared on the scene at this
juncture. After eyeing the clergyman
critically for moment he broke out:
''Say, pa, what is q jay?''
An ominous frown settled upon the
brow of the indulgent parent as he re-
piled: "A jay, my son, is a rather SNOWY
bird having low, erectile crest Of teath-
ers and"
But, pa, they can fly, can't they?"
Certainly, my boy. They are noted,
too, for their propensity to chatter, and,
for instance, to ask foolish questions -
The frown deepened as the boy went
on:
But how can they fly, pa, without any
wings?"
My son, think I heard your ma
calling you few moments ago.
es, pa, Pm going, only as / heard
you tell ma last night that our new min
lister was regular jay, l just wanted to
come in here TO see whether he could fly.
Say, mister Ito the astonished clergy
mani, you amt got any feathers, have
you?"
There was sudden rush on the part of
| the indulgent parent, followed by the
sudden disappearance of the youthful in
quisitor. Then came series of discord-
ant howls from the hall beyond.
''My dear SIR" observed the parent
upon entering the room, while l admit
| that | am kind and indulgent parent
whyr'
At this point the front door was heard
to slam violently. The minister had dis
| appeared, and now Mr.. Easyman is talk
ing about renting pew in another church
New York Herald.
The record-union., 1891-07-20


with the lines, and sent it racing after the
ram and bear. 1t WAS down grade, and
at turn in the road the ram sprang over
a stone wall and took across field. Just
then Holland overlook the bear, ran
the right runner of the pung against it
and tumbled it into ditch. The bear
was turned end for end, and when it got
up it started on its back track. Holland
wheeled the colt quickly, ran tho bear
down again and Knocked it out of the
road once more with the runner.
Again the bear was reversed, and when
it got up it was unable to move in a
straight course. 1t whirled round and
round in the road, and once moro Hol-
land knocked it out with the runner. He
kept doing that until the bear was pretty
well used up, and then he pulled out his
knife, stabbed it in the jugular vein and
bled it to death.
Holland found his ram in barnyard
about mile and a half from where he
had killed the bear, and after he had Sc
cured him he loaded the carcass on the
pung and drove home
The record-union., 1891-07-20
A Cask of Precious Wine.

The most precious wine in the world is
that contained in cask named the
Rose" in the Bremen town hall cell
lars. 1t is Rudesheim Rhine wine from
the year 1868, and the cask is repIenished
by degrees, whenever wine is drawn,
with carefully washed and dried gravel.
The wine has at present the color Of dark
beer, and very hard taste, but an indie
scribable aroma. 1t is never sold, but
destined exclusively for the sick of
Bremen, who receive a very small guam
tity oa the production of a doctors GER
titicate. In the year 1858 a stuck had the
value OF 300 gold dollars Ia gold dollar
equals 98 marksl. AT present the sup
posed value. .ofthis unique wine has so in
creased that bottle containing eight
glasses would cost 1S,000,000 marks, a
glassful 100000, and drop 2,346 marks
The record-union., 1891-07-20
Murdered by Prejudice.

Thousands of men die every day who
might be saved. Prejudice has murdered
many man and woman. If it were be-
Geved that the sum of disease could be
reduced by physic, much would be gained.
The nightmare ofdeath would not frighten
US as it does. In our modern civilization
we ought reasonably to expect disease to
settle upon us because we do so much to
attract it; because we so often and so
steadily expose ourselves to it. At the
same time we all ought to understand, as
part of our rudimentary education, that
to save ourselves from the effects of such
exposure some kind of fortification should
be built around our vital forces lest the
enemy carry us, as it were, by sudden
onslaught. For many years the unpreju-
diced have used BRANDRETH's PILLS in
this way and they have proved most
effective wall against the approach of
disease.
Sold in every drug and medicine store,
either plain or sugar coated.
The record-union., 1891-07-20
HOW TO KILL A BEAR.
A Frisky Colt and Pung Runner Ca,
Do it IL YOU'RE smart

Do it IL You're Smart.
While Erastus Holland of Tunkahanna
Creek was on his way home from Stauf-
fer's Mills one day last week he stopped
at Darius Myers place and bought a
ram, says the New York Sun. Holland
was driving skittish colt to punp. and
he tied the rams legs and put him in the
bottom OF the pung along with lot OF
other things that he had bought at the
mills. On his way past Owl Swamp a
bear waddled out of the bushes and
started to cross the road in front of him
At sight of it the colt snorted and
wheeled completely around in spite of ali
that Holland could do. The punp was
upset, Holland landed on his knees i'm
the snow, and the ram and everything
else in the pung rolled out. Holland
chung 10 the lines, and after he had been
dragged for some distance he stopped the
colt.
While he was getting the rig righted he
heard the ram bleating, and looking back
he saw the bear making for the ram. The
latter was struggling hard, and before the
bear reached him he had broken the strings
on his legs and jumped to his feet. The
next thing Holland knew the ram ran
past him with the bear close at his heels.
The ram legged it along the road for dear
life, and so did the bear, but the ram was
tleeter of foot, and he kept several feet
ahead of the bear.
By that time the colt had got used to
seeing the black beast. and Holland
jumped into the pung, whaled the colt
The record-union., 1891-07-20
American Girls Waists.

Dr.J C. Kellogg of Battle Creek, Mich,
spoke at the Washington High School to
the girls of the school during his visit re-
Gently.
He opened his remarks by announcing
that he was going to say some very un-
pleasant things about young ladies. Not
withstanding their good-looking faces,
he said, most of them are crippled and de-
formed. ~
The doctor has devoted fifteen years to
the study of the human figure. He has
made measurements of the Mexicans,
the Italians, German and French peas
ants, and compared the size of their
has come to the conclusion that the aver
age American woman is deformed, that
her waist is too small for her body. He
had compared the waist measurement
with the hight, and, as a result of l 200
measurements, found that the
average waist measurement is only
30 per cent. of the hight.
woman is 24.6 inches. The waist of the
Venus de Milo is AZ per cent. of the
hight. With such waist as that woman
could draw good big breath.
The waist of woman, he said, ought
to be larger than mans, because her
liver is larger. He said "a smaller heart,
but larger liver" but not pleasing the
young ladies by this remark, he added
Only in quantity; in quality IL is other
wise"
The doctor said that these organs which
should be above the waist line are SC
pressed down by tight clothing as tc
make women deformed.
| He called particular attention to the
fact that although woman doubled in
weight the measurement Of her waist
| didn't increase at all.
While in Washington the last few days
DR.. Kellogg has measured the waists o.
twelve little girls in private school, and
| found the smallest waist was % inches
| The average was "a inches; one was 25l
inches and one PSI, and those waists, he
said, will become smaller as the girls
grow older.
These restrictions of the waist cause
many other deformities, such as hollow
chests, dropping and round shoulders.
| DIR. Kellogg did not see any reason why
women shouldn't be as strong as men
The doctor spoke of the Swiss womer
who carry heavy burdens on theil
shoulders up and down hills, and sale
| that they are among the healthiest womeI
in the world.
He showed by diagrams that the same
evils occasioned in women by tigh
clothes were to be found in men who
| wore belts.
The record-union., 1891-07-20
PRACTICAL, JOKES
A Very Tough One Played on Young
Clerk.


It is related of certain French come
dian that he would rather indulge in an
lnoffensive practical joke than keep faith
with his manager. Numerous instances
of his breach of the one and adherence to
the other are eXtant.
An incident in the latter line that he
confessed to himself was, that on certain
occasion he entered prominent hard
ware store when nobody was in attend
ance but young clerk. This individual
on his entrance treated him with that dis
tant and f1ippant condescension, (which,
although it exists there, is perhaps less a
characteristic of the Partisan counter
jumper than his kind elsewhere.
The actor took in the youths mental
proportions at glance and said:
Il would like, if you please, nice
copy of Hugo's complete works.
1--WE don't sell books here. This amt
no book shop. You are in hardware
store.r
''Oh, well, Pm not very particular" !"
continued the player, pretending with an
excellent imitation of nature that he was
very deaf. "It doesn't matter whether
bound in calf or morocco"
But this is no bookstoreD Shrieked
the attendant. getting red in the face
Just SO, just so,'' went on the come
dian. Pack it up in your incest shape.
But l would like to write my name in
it."
The young man gasped and fell back
against the counter. Then, with voice
that made the very nails in the floor rat
tie, he yelled:
''This-ain't-no BooK-STOREu'
"Oh, very well, then, I'll wait, OF
course" and the actor quietly took a
chair.
The clerk choked another effort to
either burst blood vessel or make some
impression on the others tympanum,
but at that moment the proprietor en-
tered.
For heavens sake, Mr.. Chysel," he
cried, eNcltedly, rushing toward him,
hurry up. There's crazy man in here.
and | can't make him understand me-"
Mr.. Chysel approached the comedian
and inquired blandly:
Can do anything for you STRIP
Certainly you can. | want a flea
common five-inch rat-tail file, if you
please. You have them?''
Certainly"
The side look Of whitening scorn the
proprietor gave the clerk was such that
for months afterward he dreamt he was
so small that deaf customers We're con-
tinually lifting him up and dropping him
through the eyes of needless Philadel-
delDhia Times
The record-union., 1891-07-20
1t Worked Like a Charm.

''This is my last drink" said the i'm
pecunious customer, as he opened a
small paper and sprinkled white pow
der into the liquid
stop! stop" cried half dozen bar
room loungers, as they ran toward him.
"Hands off," he cried; this is my
potion" and he swallowed it at q
drought.
Now, barkeeper, you can collect your
fee from the Coroner"
Don't die here" shrieked the bar
keeper, and he rushed the wretched man
out on the street, and in five minutes had
the place shut tight as a bank.
Did the man die? No, he didn't. he
slid round the corner laughing.
''It worked" he chuckled; IT wouldn't
have believed it, but it worked like a
MICE" and again his mellifluous laughter
fioated out on the night air.-Detroit Free
Press
The record-union., 1891-07-20
ORIGIN OF THE BEDBUG
A Little Light on an Unpleasant Sub
ject-What Bug Means.

Concerning the origin of the bedbug
there is much dispute. For a long time
it was declared that the creature was in
troduced in Europe in timber brought
from America, but this is doubtless un-
true, according to the Washington Stdr
The name bug is Celtic word signi-
flying ghost or goblin, probably because
the animal is particularly the terror OF
the night. Hence the term "bugbear''
and 'bug" in this sense often occurs in
Shakespeare. In NichoLsOn'S Journal
there is mention ola man who, far from
disliking bedbugs, took them under his
protecting care and would never suffer
them to be disturbed until, in the end,
they Swarmed in an incredible degree,
and after his death millions were found
in his bed and chamber furniture, Two
centuries ago there was q hospital at
Surat, not for human beings, but for the
lower animals, even to insects. Beggars
were hired by the management of the
humanitarian concern to pass nights
among fleas and bedbugs, on the express
condition of suffering them to enjoy the
feast without molestation. At the pres
ent time the bedbug is sometimes given
by country people in Ohio as cure for
apue.
The record-union., 1891-07-20
A HORSE THAT SULKS,
Strange Exhibition of Seeming Jealousy
by a Brooklyn Equine.

by q Brooklyn Equine.
In a fashionable boarding stable in
New \ Ork is n horse called Tatters, about
which the Brooklyn Standard Union.
tells story. Tatters belongs to lady
who makes great pet of him, and never
visits the stable without taking him some
apples, carrots or sugar, of which he is
extremely fond. In a neighboriDg stall
is the horse of her friend, an animal re-
joicing in the name of Phil. Tatters and
Phil are on good terms, but the former
sometimes throws his ears back and
manifests jealousy when his mistress,
after giving him an apple or carrot gives
one to Phil. One day she went into the
stable while Tatters was in the hands of
the groom. He began begging for an
apple, and she deferred the gift until the
groom had finished his work and the
horse had returned to his stall. Mean
time she gave an apple to Phil. When
Tatters had gone to his stall she offered
him an apple, but he refused to take it,
and turned his head from her in disgust.
For half an hour she coaXed him, but to
no purpose. Then the groom tried to in
duce him to take it, and then another
groom made the same effort, but all in
vain. Take the apple he would not, nor
would he recognize his mistress in any
way. His ears drooped and he had the
appearance of q child in the Sulks Just as
much as horse can possibly have it,
His heart was broken, not so much be-
capse an apple had been given to another
horse, but because it had been given be-
fore he himself had received one But by
the next day heseemed to have forgotten
his grievance, and you may be sure that
his owner has been careful not to offend
him since in the same way.