Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1891-11-19

When a new rooster shows up in a
bsrnyard the "cock of the walk" without
any provocation whatever, pounces upon
the new arrival and tries to spread him
over the adjacent landscape. There is a
fierce but brief contest. and il the new
arrival comes out victorious, it is ever
afterwards in all their subsequent social
relations, .Apres vous monster" with
the defeated candidate.
Changing the &c xes of the combatants
that is what occurred as soon as Mrs.
Snort showed up in the White House. but
Mrs. Harrison soon discovered that the
Boston pullet was "loaded for bear"
The joint dis, ussion occurred when we
took dinner for the first time with the
Harrisons The last round was particu
larly interesting. Coffee had Just been
served. and Mrs. Harrison, who had lost
good deal of plumage in the discussion.
said:
Isn't it little singular. Mrs. Snort,
that there are so many more blue stock
ings in Boston than in Indianaf'
at isn't at all singular" replied Mrs
Snort. smiling pleasantly, "when you
take into consideration how much more
blue blood there is in Boston than there
is in Indiana"
Mrs. Snort-I'll (spsnk) teach YOU
(spank) good manners, (spank) you little
hoosier imp (spank. spsnk).
Baby Mckee Please, mum, Ill be
good Goo boo).
President Harrison-Ah, Minerva dear,
IL you bad only been the mother of my
son Russell he would have turned out ell
right. and not been the WEAKNESS of his
father that he is.
gave a genuine rebel yell, and Harri>
son. Who had his mouth full of coffee, had
to laugh too. and came very near choking
to death. Mrs. Harrison indignantly
withdrew from the convention.
Another little episode occurred yester-
day that goes TO show the superiority of
Massachusetts mind over Indiana matter.
Mrs. Snort spanked Baby Mckee for i'm
pudence, and they didn't dare raise row
about it.
Minerva came into our boudoir where
was smoking. On hearing her fairylike
step 1 said:
Birdie. CHATS her pet name), come to
its own wootsie- tootsie duckum, and get
your yum-yum. Shorty always has yum.
yum on tap for his little Birdie Whose
Birdie is 90? Is 90 Bllly's Bnde?" etc.,
etc.
Instead of Birdie festooning my swan
like neck with her ivory arms, she stood
in front of me and said:
William, l have just castigated that
Mckee child"
Good for you, Birdie. The little
wretch ought to be spanked three times
a day with steam welded mush paddle
but what did he do to earn its"
He pointed his finger at me and sang
a low song which contains request to
one 'Johnnie'-presumsbly Jonathan
to procure his fowling-piece. with several
Of the last clause
20. he pointed to you and sang Johns
Die get your gun. gun, gum Mrs. Hsr
rison put him up to that"
''1es, said Minerva. with fire enough
IN her eyes to start Chicago fire, and l
put him over my knee and spanked him |
SO hard that l fear have caused q luxa
lion of the phalsnges and metacsrpus of |
my dexter hand ="
We'll. 1 am glad you didn't sprain it,
Minerva was SO thoroughly exssperated |
hat 1t took me more than half an hour |
% get her back into good bumor again
The warning Baby Mckee got may
create sensation Of chiliiness among |
some of the first ladies of the land.
Mrs. Col. Snort has created great |
ensation in Washington society. Where,
'ver she goes she is the cynosure of all |
yes. and there is great rivalry among the
lobi ity TO become intimate with US. Mrs
Snort instructs me to send you her CON-
ailments. She is not feeling as we'll rs
The did in Boston but all newcomers in
Washington are more or less affected by
ne miasmatic vapors Of the Potomac
iats. Yours truly, BILL SNORT