The morning call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1878-1895, 1891-06-06
THE GOOD OLD TIMES.

- w ny, you KNOW saul MIS- OlONtttS
"Bayley has been in Jail for debt for the last
ten years"
In-jail-for-debt," said Blewitt; "here
we are again. have been transplanted. l
give up; but say, here is cents. You send
q letter down TO brother John and he Will be
up here in a day or two"
"Why, husband, the mail only goes once
a week, and then he will be three days COM
ing up on the stage, and, furthermore, it will
cost a shilling-12 cents-to send q letter to
Albany"
Say, said Blewitt Just bury me, will
you? don't belong to this century. Stage
cOaehesl Twelve cents postage! Telegraph
him, then!"
There goes another new word, said his
wife in a solemn voice, and she wetted
cloth and laid it on his forehead, as she re-
peated to herself: Telegraph what q
funny word j.
Blewitt was in despair Could 1t be that
all the common things of life were to him
dream? Had he ever ridden on the cars?
Did he ever own a moving machine? Was
there ever a telegTaph-pOle IN front OF his
house? He turned his eye and looked out.
he only saw the tall post snd long pole OF
the well-sweep. Along the other side of the
road ran Z dense forest. be vas willing 10
swear that he had once owned nice meadow
where that wood was. Backed up against
the log fence was an OX-CaTt with q neap as
large as q young libeTty-p0le. Down cellar
he could hear the banging OF an Old-faSh-
Toned churu. He looked ND the road TO the
east and saw the road was full OF great
heml0ck and pine stumpS, and over II the
doctor was coming on horseback, with sad
dle-bags before him.
BleWitt was a loan of determination, and
he arose from the lounge and went to the
door TO consult with his wife.
- Marie - said he - flpTo has bpRU pn0ugb
of this fOoishness. You stare at everything
/ talk about, and l can't locate myself, or
seem to fay in my surroundings. Now,
will you just answer me one question :?
Certainly l Will if l understand i" said
"Wen. then, who is President of these
ERE United States?"
"Why. John Adams, Of course" she
said.
Blewitt sank down and whispered: Then
you never heard of Cleveland swingin'
round the Circle?"
No never" she answered.
"Then, all right. Shoot me or put me in
bag and lay me away IN the garrett
have got through" said Blewitt, and he
went back to the lounge ana fell asleep.
When he awOke 1t was Sunday morning,
and the whole family were stirring around
getting ready Tor meeting. His wife, of
whom he was somewhat proud, had put on
a dress with a waist about nine inches long
q
and on her head such a b0nnetl 1t made
Blewitt hold his breath, but he had got
through talking. Tue boys had on suits of
full-cloth, and shiTt-cOlaTs seven inches
wide Blewtt smiled. but said nothing. At
last Mrs Blewitt came to him and asked
him if he was going to church.
Certainly, certainly" said he, anything
to accommodate. Tell one Of tue boys to
hitch horse on to the top carriage"
Top carriage? There you go again"
10 the stone boat, hitch on TO the Ox-eart,
hitch on to anything. Have II your own
way"
"Why, we will go on horseback-you on
the saddle, l on the pillon behind" said
the wife.
"All right" said Blewitt, and away they
went.
Blewitt made soma adverse remarks about
the singing in the church, which was led
by a deacon with fiddle. The sermon was
too long, toe. 1t lasted two hours. On his
way home from church his wife appeared to
be in a fear of something and urged him to
hurry up. lie asked her what allied her,
and she told him, in trembling voice, that
his queer talk had made the minister think
him bewitched, and she feared he would be
burned or drowned.
what kind of country is this, any
how? ?" asked Blewitt.
Then Mrs Bewitt reminded him that in
New England several had thus died, and
Iudl every DOGy DellEFpQ IN IL, anu the cHQTcu
was dead on witchcTaft.
Then l guess we better light out from
here" said Blewitt, as he clapped spurs TO
his horse.
Away they went, rattle-te-bang, over
stumpS and logs an stones, and there was
rattle and roar behind, and he knew they
were after him. They came 10 a log bridge
over brook. and they struck il so hard that
down it went, Blewitt and horse and wife,
and with yell of despair he awOke-yeS,
awOke, for the chair had tipped too far back
and he was in a heap on the floor, with his
head In a pan OF apples and his feet in Mrs.
Blewitts Waste-basket He heard the rat
ding yet. and he looked out of the window
to discover its source, and saw that the boys
had started the reaper in the field OF wheat
One Of the girls had just driven into the
yard with the tOp-carriage, and was just
taking out bis daily mail, and had offered
him a telegraph dispatch about his hops.
His wife was putting in a tenor to the racket
with a sewing machine in the front room,
and the hired girl was blackening the cook
ing range.
With pleased smile Blewitt sauntered
out to the wheat field, and as the reaper
stopped, he said: Darn the good old times
These ere times is good enough for me-"
What's that, fatEer?" said John, 81
thought you was in favor of the real, honest.
reliable, good, old-fashioned times Of 100
years agO?
Never you mind, john" said the smiling
father. You can 60 down buy that
Thompson colt you've been wantn', and
let Charley have your side bar buggy; and
say, If the wheat amt tskin' no hurt, you
may 60 down to Barnum'S Circus tomorrow
and cut the wheat next day."
He looked down at his diagonal pants and
white Marseiles vest and muttered as he
went to the house; Darn the good old
timeSl These ere Tires will dew fur mel'
Professor Gouge, in albany Journal