The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1891-05-28

what caused the accident years ago ON
the Hudson River railroad. 1t was an
| intoxicated man who for joke pulled
! the string of the air brake and stopped
the train at the most dangerous point
of the journey. But the lightning
train, not knowing there was any inn
pediment in the way, came down crush
ing out of the mangled victims the i'm
mortal souls that went speeding instant
~ to the God and to Judgment. It was
only joke. He thought it would be
such fun to stop the train. He stopped
it! And so infidelity is chiefly anxious
to stop the long tram of the Bible, and
the long train of the churches, and the
long train of Christian influences, while
coming down upon us are death, judg
ment and eternity, coming a thousand
miles a minute, coming with more force
than all the avalanches that ever slipped
from the Alps, coming with more
strength than all the lightning
trains that ever whistled or shriel1ed, or
Numbered across the continent
Now, in this sentiment of infde1
thinkers can not join, and 1 propose
y L
be an infdel, and so / will try to help
out of this present condition any who
may have been struck with the awful
plague of skepticism.
First, can not be an infidel because
infdelity has no good substitute for the
consolation it proposes to take away.
You know there are millions of people
whoget their chief consolation from this
book. What would you think of cru
SADIE of this sort? Suppose man should
resolve that he would organize a con-
spiracy to destroy all the medicines
from all the apothecaries and from all
the hospitals of the earth. The work
is done. The medicines are taken and
they are thrown into the river, or the
lake, or the sea. A patient wakes up
at midnight in a paroxysm of distress,
and wants an anodyne. "Oh," says the
nurse, ''the anodynes are all destroyed;
we have no drops to give you, but in
stead of that I'll read you book on the
absurdities of morphine, and on the abb
surdities of all remedies" But the man
continues to writhe in pain, and the nurse
says: '1'n continue to read you some
discourses on anodynes, the cruelties of
anodynes, the indecencies of anodynes,
the absurdities of anodynes. For your
groan I'll give you a laugh" Here in
the hospital is a patient having gan
grened limb amputated. He says, ''Oh,
for ether. Oh, for ehloroform." The
doctors say: "Why, they are all de-
stroyed; we don't have any more chic
reform or ether; but 1 have got some
thing great deal better. Pll read you
a phamphlet against James Y. Simp-
son, the discoverer of chloroform as
an an@sthetic, and against Drs.
Agnew and Hamilton and Hosack
and Mott and Harvey and Abernethy
''But, says the man, 81 must have some
an@sthetics. mo" say the doctors,
''they are all destroyed, but we have
got something d great deal better"
what is that?" Gun" Fun about
medicines. Lie down, all We patients
in Bellevue hospital and stop your
groaning-all We broken-hearted of all
the cities and quit our crying; we have
the catholicon at last! Here is a dose of
wit, here is a Strengthening plaster of
sarcasm, here is bottle of ribaldry
that you are to keep well shaken up
and take a spoonful of it after
each meal, and if that does not
cure you, here is a solution of bias
phemy in which you may battle, and
here is a tincture of derision. Tickle
the skeleton of death with repartee!
make the king of terrors caclzle! For
all the agonies of all the ages, a Joke!
Millions of people willing with up
lifted hand toward Heaven to affirm
that the Gospel of Jesus Christ is full
of consolation for them, and vet in
fidelity proposes to take it away, giving
absolutely nothing, except fun. Is
there any greater height, or depth, or
length, or breadth, or immensely of
meanness in all Gods universe?
Inidelity is religion of ''don't
know" Is there God? Don't know!
Is the soul immortal? Don't know! If
we should meet each other in the future
world will we recognize each other?
Don't know! A religion of 'tdon't know"
for the religion of 81 know" 81 know
in whom I have believed" 81 know
Ohe1O ASy AeOOSCuCI 11fCbus 1luQGllUV
proposes to substitute a religion of
awful negatives for our religion of glo-
rious positives showing right before MS
a world of reunion and ecstasy, and
high companionship, and glorious wor-
ship, and stupendous victory; the might
lest 10y of earth not high enough to
reach to the base of the Himalaya of
uplifted splendor awaiting all these
who OH the wing of Christian faith win
soar toward it.
Furthermore, can not be an infideI
because of the false charges infdelity
is all the time making against the Bible.
Perhaps the Islander that has made the
most impression, and that some Chris
tians have not been intelligent enough
to deny, is that the Bible favors polyg-
amy. Does the God of the Bible up-
hold polygamy, or did He? How MANY
wives did God make for Adam? He
made one wife. Does not your com
mon sense tell you when God started
the marriage institution He started it
as He wanted it to continue? If God
had favored polygamy He could have |
created for Adam five wives, or ten