Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-05
Mr.. AND MRS. eoWSER.
The Head Of the House Gets on the Ira
o of tile Deadly Microbe.

Tho Head OF the House Gets on the Trail
of tile Deadly niicrobe.
"What's the matter, and what have you
got there?" ouered Mrs. Bowser as he came
home the other day half an hour ahead of his
usual time, and being loaded down with
heavy purchase of something.
Don't say word-not word, and don't
bother me for ten minutes! hope I'm in
time to avert the dangerl"
She turned pale and fell upon the sofa,
and he hurriedly broke the string securing
the package, seized the three quart bottles
which comprised it's contents and rushed
up stairs, down the back stairs, down into
the basement and up again. A strange.
disagreeable odor followed him as he
hustled around, and by the time he had re-
turned to the sitting room Mrs Bowser
had recovered sufficiently to ask:
"Mr. Bowser, what on earth are you do
ing. and what in the name of goodness is
that stuff"
what have l been doing? Saving our
lives, Mrs. Bowser-saving the life of every
one under this roof!'
"But IL didn't know our lives were in
danger"
"Of course not. If the house was on fire
from top to bottom and the fremen pitch
ing our furniture out of the windows you
might possibly realize the fact, but it has
never struck you that death silently turks
in every room in this house."
"How you talk, Mr. Bowser! What has
been the danger hanging over us"
Microbes, Mrs. Bowser" he whispered,
as he sat down and wiped his heated face.
microbes and bacteria-millions of 'emp'
'It can't be!' she replied.
"Can't it! You've lived in New York
two weeks, been out as far as Broadway
once, and you think you know all about
it'll Iknew, of course, but having SO many
other things to see to this one slipped my
mind until today"
"But what causes that terrible odor?"
Nothing terrible about it, as l see. On
the contrary, | rather like it. 1t is the
odor Of disinfectants, Mrs. Bowser-the
odor of something which has no doubt
saved our lives"
"How?"
"By killing off the microbes and bacteria,
which would soon have entered our sys-
TENS and produced terrible illness, if not
DEATH"
"Well, 1 suppose you know BEST" she
said, as she opened window to let a yard
or two of the carbolic smell dodge out.
Certainly l do, certainly. All husbands
do. Mrs Bowser, let me draw you pict-
ure of a microbe. You can then realize
the danger which menaced u.s."
He drew the insect, and as she surveyed
it in surprise and disgust, he continued:
mice thing to have about forty of those
birds cantering around through your sys-
tenn, eh?"
"Where do they come from?"
"Sewer gas. By this time tomorrow the
house would have been swarming with
them, and nothing on earth could have
saved US from typhoid fever or diphtheria.
If the microbe was the only thing to look
out for l shouldn't have been so anxious,
but there is the bacteria"
whats that?
"Here is u picture of him. Comes in the
same way, and his mission is to eat out the
lungs. 1t is calculated that 1900 of them
will eat out the strongest mans lungs in
month"
"And they were in this houseP she
asked.
Fright here, in this house."
"And ready to be absorbed into our sys-
tems?"
'Not only ready. but anxious"
4ou dIo Sufo yOu OOu uucttu COCk-
reaches? saw two under the kitchen sink
yesterday, and was going to ask you to get
some powdered borax."
'Mrs. Bowser," he began, as he stood up,
"are you growing soft in the top of your
head? Do know Bengal tiger from
woodchuck?"
"I-I suppose So"
"But don't know a microbe or a bacte.
ria from cockroach?" he thundered.
"But never heard you speak of them
before, and LIP
"Do you imagine that or any other hus-
band sits down and tells his wife all he
knows?" he shouted. Because 1 haven't
told you that a jack rabbits legs have three
joints is that any reason why haven't
known it for forty yearsr'
"But this is medical science, isn't it?"
she softly protested.
"And suppose it is! Do you suppose Pve
gone sloshing around all these years with
nothing but recipe for making soft soap
in my head?"
She was silent, and after striding up and
down the room few times he halted be-
fore her and continued:
"a wife isn't expected to know these
things, of course, but Pll be accounted a
pretty husband and father and member of
a scientific club if didn't know all about
microbes and bacteria"
"But that picture of bacteria looks like
lobster" she persisted.
"Lobsterl Looks like lobster, does it?
Very we'll, Mrs ,G'owser, this discussion
will end right here. 1t is plain enough
that you haven't the necessary knowledge
to appreciate it,"
"But don't you"-
"Never you mind, Mrs. Bowser! Let it
drop right here Is supper ready?"
The odor was so strong in the dining
room that the butter tasted of it, and after
supper the cook called Mrs. Bowser into
the kitchen to ask:
''Is it going to be like this all the timer"
"Oh, no. Mr.. Bowser had to kill off the
microbes and bacteria, you see."
whats them9"
"Pll have him come out and explain"
"No need of it, ma am, for my bundle is
all made up, and Pm going. A man who'll
drag dead cats through his own house
would cheat poor girl out of her wages
at the end of month. Microbes and bac-
terra, eh9 don't believe it'll Let him show
them to me up in the Geological gardensl'
When Mrs. Bowser told Mr. Bowser
what had occurred he bristled up, got red
in the face and exclaimed:
II see how it is; couldn't carry your
point with me, and SO you went out and