Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-07
Dead Sea Fruit.

II you ever met Suzette
Surely memry brings regret
If not signing;
Visions of fair women's faces,
Rustling silks and fluffy laces
Flowers dying.
If you ever saw suzette,
Wreathed in smoke of cigarette.
Atyou glancing,
You imagined life's best prize
Gould be captured from her eyes
So enhancing.
If you ever let Suzette
Weave around you silken net
Heart caressing,
You'll recall pleasant hour;
But dry leaf, not flower,
You were pressing
If you ever met Suzette
You amused a gay coquette
For season,
Now in every flashing eye.
Black as night or blue as sky,
You see treasonI
WHEN you wrestle with the world you Sc.
| cure a good hold if you grab time by the
| forelock.
THE brush is mightier than the pen in the
production ofspectacular dramas.
DICK QUAY read a novel while the hustlers
| at Harrisburg hustled in caucus. Dick will
| doubtless be a Legislative novelty.
TIE seals will probably be exterminated be.
| fore the Bering Sea correspondence Is termin-
| ated.
WHEN burlesque is burlesqued it becomes
a farce.
A DOG in Chicago saved six souls from hor-
rible fate and lost its life. If there is a dog
heaven, that canine will surely occupy place
of honor.
DEAD issue-The force bill.
A WATCH company has failed. Too much
tick will swamp any concern.
THE Grangers are in control at Harrisburg.
| If they refuse to farm out their votes to the
| bosses states will be smashed to smithereens.
Give Her Time.
The world will seem place of bliss,
Life will become more sweet
When in the car a standing Miss
Will thank you for a seat.
THE newspapers which stick to the super
| fuous .h' in Pittsburg putting the much
abused letter in BeriDg, in spite of the Govern
ment order to dropit
A MILK company has assigned. In this case
| the water was in the stock.
THE Supreme Court has decided that shoot
ing quail and eating quail are not Synonymous
| terms. Birds shot in Ohio can be served on
toast here at any time.
WOMEN are clamoring for recognition. Still
they keep changing their dresses fast that it
keeps man on the lookout to recognize his
| own wife.
A GREAT many reformers imagine that
new human nature can be created by agitation.
| They are wasting their energies.
IF you work youearn living. and that's all
you have been promised in this world.
IT'S better to confine your fourishes to your
signature and be plain in public.
Not An for Glory.
Our cup of woe is now chock full
The statesmen are at work;
They will soon pull each others wool
| Or WELD the party dirk.
At Harrisburg the FUR will hy;
But after all, it's play.
They're devlish sly-they close our eye,
And draw the usual pay.
THE soldiers say sduaws cannot be distin-
! gufshed from bucks, and fight just as fiercely
| as their husbands. But machine guns are not
respecters of persons, anyway.
CARE must sit lightly on the shoulders of
women. If it didn't it would soon feel the
| sharp ridge of the puff.
| LACK of cash is the alleged cause OF the col
| lapse of the window glass trust. Better say 1t
was an over supply of common sense. gentle.
men.
| BETWEEN the Indian war and the burlesuue
craze the red paint makers, will reap golden
| harvest.
THE Indian Commissioner has asked Con-
| gress to give him money for seeds. He proba-
| bly, imagines seed must be used to plant In
dians. If Uncle Jerry Rusk should make a
break like this his farmer friends would shunt
| him.
| KERR says Pattisons Cabinet will be Har-
! rity, Hensel and McClelland. Mr.. Kerr takes
| The DISPATCH.
ALLEGHENY would feel better If somebody
would turn on the light for her.
THE weather reports often mention mean
temperature. but pass the weather by without
an epithet.
| MILES still lives to part his hair.
| CITY politicians are beginning to realize that
| slick statesmen can be raised in the rural dis
itricts as well as turnips.
WILLIE WINKLE