davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07
TERMS OF THE DISPATCH.
PITTsBURG, MONDAY, SEPT. 1, 1871.
AN EXPLOSION OF THE RAIN MAKERS.

The race between the Government rain
makers and Melbourne, the Australian in
yentor of rain-making machinery. has, up
to date, appeared nearly dead heat. The
Government rain makers sent back glow.
ing, or rather damp, reports from Texas,
OF the rains which followed their aerial
explosions; while Melbourne went out to
Cheyenne and, after he had done a due
amount of grinding on his machine, a rain
of three-uuarterS of an inch fell on the
aStOniShcd inhabitants Of that Western
town. As quarter of an inch of water
is all that the Cheyenne citizens use in
their whisky, they are copying the pro-
verbal question what in blank they are
expected TO do with so much water. On
the post hoc, 7Dr0pter hoe logic honors are
easy between the explosive rain generators
and the Australian wizard
But the letter which comes from Texas
and appears in our news columns this
morning deals the Government rain manu-
facturCrs a black eye in thei: regulations.
The epigrammatic, if hyperbolic assertion
is made from the scene of action that the
Government eXperimenters have not pro-
uuced "enouGh ram 10 water their WHISKY
while the peTverSe elements vOuchsafed
that region several showers before the
experiments began. If this obviously un-
friendly criticism is founded on fact, it
may be explained that the reported devO-
ton Of the Government party to spirituous
potables is due to a scientific theory that
a condition of general humidity may be
i Al,
suit of intoxicants in multiplying the
objects of vision will afford an eXplana-
ton of the large volume of rain produce.
in the previous reports.
1t is getting to be pertinent question
whether the rain-making business is
fraud OF a fact There is not much room
for doubt as to Melbourne, but this ruth
less exposure of the scientific junketerS
viii make it necessary for them to define
themselves
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07
APoor Season for the Resorts.
Brooklyn Standardization. =.

Brooklyn Standardization
was talking with General Jourdan yes
terday when he made the observation that
this has been the poorest season for summer
resorts in years. He referred especially to
Coney Island, in which he, of course, is most
interested, being the President of the Brook
lyn and Brighton Beach Railroad. The
principal cause for the poor season, the
General said, was the fact that there were 46
rainy days. The season is only about 70 days
long, and when more than half of these are
rainy the profits of the proprietor Of the
seaside resorts are bound to suffer. General
Jourdan said that Coney Island was not
alone in having bad season. All the re-
and in several places hotels have failed,
notably in Atlantic City, N. j., where two OF
them have gone under. He said that New
port and Bar Harbor were about the only
resorts on tho upper Atlantic coast that had
had any sort of Il season at all.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07
FACETIoUs FANCIEs.
CHUTE IT.

Oh, aeronautic sailor folk,
By high ambition goaded,
Before you try to parachute
See If the darn things loaded.
-Washtnoton Ss1r.
Mrs. Bilkins-1 never saw such forget
full man in my life as you are. The clock has
stopped again. Mr.. Bnkins-That's because you
forgot to wind it. Mrs. Bilkins-Huni You know
very well, Mr.. Bilkins that told you % remind
me to wind 1t and you forgot about it.-Se0 York
Weekly.
Chauncey-General, that was pretty
fine speech Of yours.
Horace-Thank you, Chauncey. Irather liked IL
myself.
chauncey-I don't think you SPEAK it as well As
you used to, Horace. .-Ssa0 YORK HsrohI
Mother, will you be kind enough to
cook tho dinner to-day? John was 50 dissatisfied
with the cook thatI sent her of, without telling
him about it,
Certainly. my daughter"
John lat the dinner tabe)-Maria, you must send
of that cook This is the worst deal she has given
me yet.-Tsras SVtfnOS.
ST have such an indulgent husband" said
little Mrs. Doll 'Yes; 50 George says, " responded
Mrs Sntteft1l ''SOmetimes indulges too much
doesn't Z he -BostOH Transcript.
"Hear about that little difference between
lieutenant Governor Jones of New York and the
barber who shampoos him?'' inquired the exchange
editor placing a weapon of defense within reach.
s.No What was it2 A matter Of sS cents?'' said
the financial editor. bristlng up susplciously and
looking about for bis cane
.sThe difference. " rcjoned the exchange editor
dehantly lis that one pays the freight and the
other trays the pate.-Chicn1o Tribune.
An imperious individual entered a
crowded street car and did not notice that at the
door there was n vacant seat.
sit up there, will you,' he said grufay to the
passengers.
sit down there, win you, " said one OF the pas
sengers pulling him suddenly by the coat tails into
the vacant space.-DstrVit Free Prsss.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07
EeAN MUST BE RECALLED.
Recent Events Have Destroyed His Useful
ness Diplomat.

New York Tribune, Rep.J
me recall of Minister Egan from Santiago
VIII PROBABLY be rendered necessary by the
oownfau OF the Balmaceda Government
mhether justly or unjustlv, he has incurred
the displeasure Of the leaders Of the vic
torious party. 1t Is evident that another
American Minister would exercise greater
nnuence and excite less personal resent
ment than Mr.. Egan in the transition period
wnlch must ensue in Chilean politics. We
Doubt not that the Administration will
speedlly replace him, and thereby improve
It's relations with the maritime Republic.
AT such crisis it will be of the highest i'm
portance to have the United States repre-
sented at Santiago by strong and ex-
perienced diplomatist who has not aroused
prejudice In any quarter. 1t would be wiser
20 transfer Minister from some other
tirely fresh appointment.
The displacement of Minister Eynn will
simply be one of the fortunes Of civil war.
During the American conflict the foreign
ministers, with few exec tions were mark
edly in sympathy with the insurgents but
they remained at Washington accredited to
the National Administration. This was in
accordance with general diplomatic usage
whenever there is civil war the representa-
tiVes OF foreign powers are under obligation
to maintain relations with the legitimate
government at the capital. 1t was Minister
ESdn > uuCy TO remain IN SanblagO and to
recognize in Balmaceda the chief executive
who had been elected by the nation pre-
c1sely as the British and French Ministers
were stationed at Washington rather than at
Montgomery or Richmond. In performing
that duty lie has given otfense to the victors.
Tne success of the Congressional party in
wolves his recall Tor tho simple reason that
MS relations were necessarily more intimate
with Balm2ceda than with the Junta at
1quique. The Congressional leaders may en-
tertnln deeper feeling of resentment
against him than the circumstances have
justified, but the fact that they are exceed
1ngly bitter in their complaints of extreme
partisanship on his part during the civil war
mevftab bly, impairs his usefulness in the pres
ent crisis. The Administration doubtless
VIII speedily recognize the necessity of de-
ferring to the wishes OF the leaders of the
victorious party, and recalling a Minister
whose continued presence in the capital is
now source or embarrassment.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07
A WARNING TO CHICAGO.
Take Lesson From Paris and Don't Call
Down the Wrath of Heaven.

1ake u l1esSOu anu DOnL Call
Down the Wrath of Heaven.
Philadelphia Times.l
We do not remember whether at the time
of the construction of the Tour Eiffel any
body was sagacious enough to point out the
fate of the projectors and builders of the
Tour Babel as an awful warning, but if it
wasn't done some prophet has apparently
lost good chance TO score. 1t is not that a
confusion of tongues has resulted among the
visitors to the Eiffel tower though the
polyglot inscriptions in the elevators might
easily have brought about that consumma-
tion through the intemperate efforts of the
curious to read them. The judgment>which
has overtaken the city of Paris is OF differ.
ent nature, and, as BELTS the times, wears a
more scientific cast.
French meteorologists now boldly declare
that NJ. Eiffers prodigy has entirely ruined
their climate. Thrusting its proud head up
iuto the clouds, 1t attracts the electric forces
of nature, which come and perform their
terrifying gambols around Its metallic sum-
init and cause every manner of aerial dis
turbance in their power. 1t behooves us to
study Ihese significant phenomena closely,
for we are not only projecting, planning and
raising buildings which may turn out Babels
they are certainly not intended for Bethels
but Chicago is promising herself a Tour OF
her own. If Judgment follows the build
ing of a Tour Chicago it will doubtless be
appropriate. Maybe the inhabitants of the
city will be stricken with modesty.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07

lands of the East or in the new territory
of the West they would speedily become
self-supporting citizens, small-property
owners in their own right and material
addition to our productive forces in de-
partment where overproduction is impos-
sible. The fact that this has already
been done with marked success in New
Jersey makes the failure to pursue the
policy peculiarly wanton blunder
With the demonstration of the beneficial
results of that course the crowding OF the
immigrants into the tenements and slums
of New York to break down the wages OF
already underpaid labor is mark OF
either exceptional idiocy or crlmlual ana
dishonest selfiShnesS.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07
The Dardanelles Agreement.

To the Editor of The Dispatch:
I see much in the papers now about a
virtual violation by Russia and Turkey of a
treaty, the terms of which prohibit the
passage of the Dardanelles by warships of
any other power than Turkey. When and
under what circumstances was the agree
ment which was violated concluded2 L.
WASHINGTON, Pa, September 8.
The agreement was one of the articles
of the treaty of peace which terminated the
Crimean War in 1855. In that France,
England and Sardinia united to pro-
tect Turkey against the aggression of
Russia, which power was known to covet the
possession of the Bosporus and the Dardan-
elles. The allies were victorious, and one of
the conditions they imposed was that those
straits shall be forever closed to the war
ships of all foreign nations, unless on special
permission of the Government of Turkey,
which permission shall not be granted with
out the consent of the other powers.l
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07
BETTER DOG THAN MASTER.
An Incident Showing That Brutes Some
times Rise Above Humanity Itself


New York World.l
"Snow is a white setter dog, and Thomas
McEvoy is "Snow's' master. McEvoy ought
to have some sense, for he is a clothing cut
ter. But he did not show any sense on
Thursday. He brought Snow down from
Newburg and drank strong drink until he
lost his balance and went to sleep on the
sidewalk at Madison avenue and Forty
second street. When McEvoy fell his hat
rolled into the gutter, but Snow" brought
it back in his teeth to his tipsy owner.
Then the dog put his fore paws on the
mans body and snarled and snapped, and
growled and barked at every one who came
near the senseless form or made as if to harm
it, Policeman Regan came along and seized
McEvoy TO raise him. 'Snow" flew at him
viciously. Regan took one or two backward
steps and reflected.
Men who looked on called Good dog, good
dog" and tried to coax "Snow" away, but he
was no more to be cajoled than scared. At
last some one lassOed him with rope.
Regan got McEvoy on his feet and took
him to the West Thirtieth street station
house, "Snow" following, tugging at the rope.
Dog and man were in jefferson Market
Police Court yesterday morning, but when
McEvoy was arraigned at the bar Snow"
was kept in the pen-in which Policeman
Regan showed ut once respect for the dog
and regard for his trousers. McEvoy was
fined IS, but had spent all his money. So dog
and master went to prison together for five
dayS.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07
CHARITY GONE AMRY.

Baron Hirsch may be pardOned, if after
reading the reports of meeting of He
brew workingmen in New York the other
night. he comes TO the conclusion that the
way of the donor Of wholesale charity is
harder than that of the transgressor. The
assemblage roundly denounced the ad.
ministratiOn of the Baron's immense gifts
for the relief of the Russian Hebrews.
The ground of complaint is that the
refugees are being brought to New York
and by the aid of the Baron'S funds are
put into the already crowded departments
of labor at rates which cut down the previ-
ously insufficient wages of the regular
workmen in those trades.
If these complaints are well founded it
shows a singuiarly stupid administration
of the HirSch charity if the most charita-
BILE view of it u taken. If less disposition
TO take tie best view possible is exercised
il might infer that the administrators
OF the fund, being interested in
the employment of labor, are using
the fund to break down wages
by importing cheap labor. This
course gives some foundation for the re-
mark Of New York cOtemporary, the
other day. that as the Argentine Republic
objects to the Hebrew immigration as
aided by the IIirscb charity the United
States should be prompt in following that
example and excluding the immigrants.
1t is plain that such course is all the
more inexcusable because an intelligent
and honest administration of the fund
would make the immigration desirable
one to any country which has surplus of
arabic land There is no dispute as to the
fruga;ity and industry of the immigrants
driven from their homes by Russian in
tolerance. A large majority Of them are
accustomed to agricultural labor. If the
Hirsch fund were used to settle them on
small farms either among the abandoned
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07
DEATHS HERE AND ELSEWHERE.
Judge Douglass Boardman.

Judge Douglass Boardman died suddenly
Saturday morning at his summer cottage at Shell
drake, N. Y, on CayugA Lake, He recently re-
turned from an outing in Alsaka. where he con-
tracted cold which developed into pneumonia
He was the law partner of Judge Finch for MANY
years He was elected District Attorney of Tomp-
kins county in 1S47 was advanced to County Judge
in 1851 and was promoted to the Supreme Court
bench in 1863. He there served until the age
limitation prohibited his re election, retiring on
December 3. 1887. His hearing of the famous Fisk
Stokes trial made his name familiar to the State
His General Term decisions gave him a high legal
standing. His more recent connection as executor
with the vast estate of Jennie McCiraw Fisk and
Cornell Universty's endeavOr through the courts
to retain the same are yet fresh in mind. He was
Dean OF the College of Law of Cornell University
and President of the First National Bank of Ithaca
He leaves large estate.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07
nIEMORY'S LESSON.

''By, byi baby by,
Sings the mother to her daughter,
When, like anchored craft on water
Stirred by breezes fitfully,
Rocks in pretty cradle nigh
Motherhood's most precious guerdon,
Blinking ut the tuneful burden
"By, byl Baby, byr'
by, by! Baby, byl''
Memory with the words is laden,
When the infant, grown maiden,
Doth unto the tradesman's HE
And, perhaps unconsciously
Musing of the songs creation,
Gives it this Interpretation
"Buy, buy! Baby, buy. .''-Boston Courier
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07
TIMELY TRIPLES.

BULL fighting is now the principal di-
version in Wall street.
THE moral element is hurrying away
from Asbury and Ocean Grove because the
trees are beginning to show their limbs.
THE tippler occasionally shows cloven
breath.
As SOON as Patti heard that gold was
leaving Europe for America she announced
another farewell tour.
WE have the tin, we have the men
To treat it in the fire,
And we will all be happy when
This chol1es the tin plate liar
THE world will surely be a stage when
the short-skirted dress cranks appear on the
scene.
BARRED oUT-The mosquito.
FOOLISH females imagine the pink of
perfection can be found in the rouge pot.
JAY GoULD's motto: s'Where there's a
rail there's way.
A FALL opening-The sidewalk coal
hole.
You saw her on the sandy shore
When she looked chic and dapper,
But now, alasl she scrubs the floor
In soap-bespattered wrapper.
Too much corn whisky will make the
voice husky.
RUSSELL HARRISON failed to raise the
wind, but he managed to raise a breeze just
the same.
WHEN the young man goes out on lark
he naturally takes fly.
BALLOONS should be available for Arctic
exploration since the Kite has been tried
with success,
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07
Mr.. O'MaIley's Performance.

New York Evening Sun.J
The late Mr.. Reed, of Pittsburg, danced so
often with Fannie Pettigrew that Michael
O'Malley killed him and two of his friends.
Mr.. O'MalIey seems to have established his
claim to the young wo:nan's hand for the
next set. In some countries Mr.. O'Malley's
own performance might be pas seul on an
unsubstantial aerial platform. Strange as it
may seem, it is nevertheless true that the
actual odds are more than 40 to against the
gentleman's indulging in any such exercise.
The ratio of hangings to homicides is less
than to 40 in PENNSYLVANIA.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07

THE following remark by the esteemed
Philadelphia Record is not up to its usual
standard of discretion: "The Junta rules in
Chile, but the burning question is, which
Junta is on top III New York Republican
politics?" This way of putting it is alto
gether too suggestive of the retort that there
is no question at all that the Hill Tammany
Junta controls New York Democratic poll.
tics
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07
THINGS IN GENERAL.

The Hunt for the Grave Of Captain Myles
Standish-John Alden and Priscilla Are
stin Living Names in the Historic Old
New England Village.
WRITTEN FOR THE DIsPATcH.l
Captain Myles Standish never claimed
to be saint The title was common enough
in the Puritan Massachusetts, OF his time,
and my friend Mr.. Hinginn, rector Of the
little Episcopal chapel here in Duxbury,
holds that Standish must have been men,
Der in full and regular standing of the
Puritan Church. Otherwise he could have
held no office in that old theocratic NUM-
cipalty. So the Captain was saint, whether
he claimed to be, or not.
Queer enough it is, in these days of demo-
cratic municipalities and i'll this land which
contains the worst-govemed cities of the
whole planet, to look across the waters of
Duxbury Bay and to remember that over
there on that opposite shore, where you see
the CLEAN of white houses'by day and the
glimmer of lights by night, was builded with
Plymouth Rock for corner stone, a city
whose charter was the Bible, and whose
supreme governor was the Lord God Al
mighty. We manage things somewhat diff
ferently, nowadays
Myles Standish, saint or not, was no doubt
handler with his sword than he was with
his Bible. He was one of those stout fellows
whose number was many in the sew enteenth
century, who were professional breakers of
the sixth commandment. He was fighter.
And it did not matter very much to him, so
long as there was fighting to do, what the
fighting was about. In the year 1920 there
was small occupation in Europe for q
mercenary soldier. So standish threw in
his fortunes with the adventurers of the
Mayf1ower, and came over here to battle
with the redskins.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07
Obituary Notes.

FRANKLIN BUG CHANAN, the noted rice dealer
and manufacturer of Savannah, Ca, died Satur-
day morning at the home of his mother in Talbot
COUNTY Md. He was the son of Admiral Franklin
Buchanan, ofthe Confederate Navy.
WILLIAM RYALLs died Saturday at his home
near Valley Springs, Ark. He was among
the irft settlers of North Arkansas, and the father
of 80 children. % of whom survive him. Seven of
these reside with his widow. Ryalls was native
Of Tennessee, and was In his S3d year,
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07

WHILE there is, as THE DISPATCH has
already said, q tendency in some quarters to
persecute Blair, the New York Suns objec-
tion to the suggestion that he be sent to
Chile is valid one. Blair's connec-
tion with the Shipherd job in the Peru
vian difficulty would make him o
very unfortunate person to send to Chile.
Besides which the United States happens to
need very able and skillful diplomatist at
Santiagoin order to retrieve past blunders.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07

THE advance of modern times is admir-
ably illustrated by the sketch and descrip
tion given elsewhere of the hospital about tc
be erected at McKeesport. This building
which will be seen from the illustration, OF
a scope and character that would be credit.
able to city of far greater size, will be a
monument to Mckeesport's public spirit
and charity. That prosperous town deserves
great praise for such an addition to its pub,
lie institutions.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07

AMONG other results of the Chilean
struggle there seems to be no doubt that the
Mannlicher rifle, with gelbite explosive,
is the most effective instrument for whole
sale killing that has been tested by practical
use A gun that can kill off the enemy at the
uninterrupted rate of one shot per second is
something that no well-proyided military
family can afford to do without.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07

The discovery by certain Democratic
organs of New York that Andrew D. White
would never do as Republican candidate
for Governor is taken by some obstinate
Republicans as an indication that White is
just the candidate they want. At the same
time the support of Prof. White by some of
the New York Republican bosses is the
latest illustration of the old adase that when
his satanic majesty was sick, hismind was
strongly turned toward religion and the
priesthood, or words to that effect.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07
Hon, Benjamin Hall.

The Hon. BENJAMIN Hall died at Auburn.
NY, yesterday morning, after lingering i'll
ness. He was born in Whitehall July o. 1914 In 1850
by the appointment of President Fillmore he made
a compilation and revision of the accumulated off,
cial decisions of the Attorney General of the
United States. In April 1851, President Lincoln
appointed him Chief Justice of Colorado n pOsftion
Of great peril in the days of the breaking out Of the
rebellion; conspiracy was formed to XIII him aud
the secessiopists. The scheme failed, and nothing
went further to defeat the plans of the Southerners
than n ruling of Judge Hall to the effect that in
cases of armed rebellion against the Government.
the courts could suspend the issue of writs OF
ahaae
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07
THE death of DR.. James R. speer. wbicl

THE death of DR.. James R. Speer. which
is noticed in our local columns, removes one
of our Oldest living citizens, who was long
an esteemed member of Pittsburg society.
The nindliness and benevolence of the old
doctor have been experienced by large
number of Pittsburgers, who will unite in
honoring his memory. He enjoyed a life of
longer and more unobtrusive usefulness and
death at a ripper old age than falls to the lot
of most men.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-09-07

How the mighty have fallen when Hon.
Jack Robinson is making his last effort for
victory in the league contest by the organi-
zation of clubs which are not even mush-
rooms, but are just Of the common toadstool
uor