River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1891-03-26
The MANY LIGHTS.
Personal Influence and True Test
Friendship.

frfeft-ntPs
II is surprising that, with the really
honest effort we make to understand
each other, we fail so frequently. II il
the triore surprising that We make this
failiire, one of the most painful in life.
for most of us acknowledge that we are
conscious of the many sides of our own
natures, and of how differently differ
emit people aifec. hs; how One friend
will call out all that is gay and joyous;
another, all that Is serious; another, all
the antagonism in us: while rarely.
very rarely, we find one whose toucb
is like the touch of master on a
harp; every string is touched, but that
hand brings out only harmony. We
all acknowledge the power the
people whom we meet have 10 bring otit
the several mental and spiritual ele-
ments that make the ego. We are con-
stantly brought H. face the fact that
those whom we know well are not esti-
mated as we estimate them by others,
and vet we are constantly surprised
that we are misunderstood. or seen only
i'm "a half light or side light. Perfectly
conscious that different people draw out
different qualities, we will not remem-
Der that we have corresponding effect
on them that all our estimates of ths
people whom we meet are based on
half knowledge, except for the very few
who enter the inner sanctuary of our
lives. and most of us guard jealousy
the way hither.
The wise person is the one who takes
from each the best he has to give, and
expects perfection only from divinity,
not from its shadow, humanity. Trust
is the foundation of felicity in any res
lation. near or remote. With that we
can defy the currents of moods, the
whirlwinds of physical disorganization,
the inroads of heredity, or the adaman-
tine walls of temperament; we know
that when the real test comes. the best
in our friend Is ours Doubt, distrust
corrode the iron chains of friendship
and they only can corrode it, Emerson
says: Il do not wish to treat friend
ships daintily. but with toughest cour-
age. When they are real, they
are not glass thread, or FROST
work. but the solidest thing we
know" And again, a friend proposes
himself for contests where Time, Want,
Danger, are in the lists, and he alone Is
victor who has truth enough in his con
stituti1n to preserve the delicacy of his
beauty from the wear and tear of
these" How many of US stand, or would
stand this test? Only In shat relation
that Emerson defines as friendship
and but few give to il the Interpretation
that he gives-is the higher test put.
Much that passes as friendship is but
little more than the q uch-and-go of
ordinary society contact and our error
is in being panied as we are when we
discover that we have mistaken the plane
of relationship. We must learn that
only when we know and are known in
all our relations TO the world In our
homes, in our families, our books, our
loves, our antipathies, are we known or
do we know. and never let the shock
that comes from the discovery of new
trait in one whom we thought we knew
destroy the building that we constructed
and called my friend II is depriving
ourselves of happiness. Better rest in
a portico whose proportions satisfy us
than on the stony road where there is
only the glare of MONDAY sun or the
unsheltered miasma of night. We will
find we get what we give in our inter
course with our fellow-lnen. Christian
Union.