The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-11-15

proper dose Of psregoric and put hot salt
I bags on the place where the pain Is and sit
and smooth your hands until YOU 20 to
sleep. l wouldn't let a woman doctor expe-
rlment on my fox-terrier; 1 know what suits
him, and l can give It 70 him myself
Women have always known you could rub
away pain; they have always known the
advantages of heat for simple ailments. and
wnen they have tried all these, then they
want man TO fall back on. Idon't think
there have been many great women paint
ert; don't think there have been many
great women writers; Adam Bede' will be
forgotten when Tiny Tim is remembered.
and Jane Eyre will be a thing of the past.
an unpleasant memory, when Col New
come Is teaching the world what a gentle
man is.
WHAT WOMEN CAN'T DO.
u never saw but one woman lawyer, but
l may mention quite casually that would
let no woman ruh my squabbles; those that
couldn't attend to myself l would refer to
Che lawyer who had Mr.. before his name
No woman need want to learn to be a
preacher she was born with that instinct
but her pulpit should be an armchair, her
listeners her immediate family, and, if she
practices as she breaches, her congregation
Will be great credit TO her. As for a
woman preacher marrying people, let peo-
pie who like it be Joined IN wedlock after
this fashion; for my own part should feel
that the preacher was married to my young
man, that we were rather mixed up, sort of
Mormons, don't you know. What women
need nowadays is little ignorance. Why,
you blessed dear. don't you know that life is
great deal happier If you don't know too
mucha Ignorance is bliss.
There never was a more beautiful poem
written In few words that that by Owen
Meredith, in which he says:
ITO thee be all men heroes; every race noble;
An women virgins; every house a temple;
Know thou nothing base"
That's my idea of knowledge am
sorry not to seem to agree with the rest OF
the band Of tea drinkers. but do think if
woman didn't know quite so much it would
be great deal better, and she would be
great deal happier. And she would make
the men around her feel that way, too.
MEN ONLY GRowN.UP BABIES.
every blessed one of you has fashion
Of taking it for granted that whatever a
man says to you isn't true. Now, nine
time out of ten it Is, so the tenth time give
him the benefit Of the doubt, and when he
finds you do believe him he will take fancy
TO living up to his reputation and he will tell
the truth SO he may not go back on you A
man is like propheJ-he wants to be be-
lieved In his own country, and when the
women of his household don't show him
that they have faith in him, he is pretty ant
to give them cause not to. Just take one of
your babies, and wnen it comes and tells
you that it loves you, and you are brute
enough to push it away because you are
too busy las II a woman ought ever to be too
busy to refuse to listen to child, then the
next time that small boy feels the same in
cllnatlon he will work it out in his baby
mind that you didn't believe him before
that you won't now, and soon he will stop
giving expression to his love, and nine times
out Of ten the love will disappear. Now.
men, In some respects, are only grown-up
babies, 80 just have faith in them, and after
awhile, from sense Of pride, maybe they
will make themselves what you think them
TO be. There, meandered from my SUBJ
ject."
HOW WOMEN END AN ARGUMENT
The small woman who had lately become
Mrs. Charley announced:
Don't surprise anybody, for you always
drift to the men,"
ought to have looked Inundated. but
didn't. simply, but forcibly, announced
that was only following the example of my
foremothsrs, who from Eve down had
shown the same inclination. The speech
maker was afraid we hadn't answered the
question, but somebody said something
about a lovely black velvet cloak that she
had seen, fresh tea was made, and the ques-
ton was allowed to sink into oblivion,
which, by the by, was the very best place
for it.
THINGS WHICH GO INTO OBLIVION.
So many things might go into oblivion
with good results-the butter that is high
and the canvas-back that is not.
The ices that are tasteless and the coffee
that tastes too much of chicory.
The buckwheat cakes that are tepid and
the oysters that are warm.
The terrapin that is messed up with some
sort Of an egg sauce, and the champagne
cup that has four bottles Of soda TO one of
champagne.
The soup in which the cook has lost the
pepper POI end the mutton done crisp.
The tea that wants a prop because of It's
weakness aud the toast that's thicker than
cream.
The eggs that are not infaIlible and the
milk that has been so long away that it mas
forgotten the COW.
But, most Important of all, there
should go to oblivion the bad cooks-they
have wrecked families, they have caused in-
digestion, and have MADE the
hour of dinner one of sadness and despair
when ii should be one of joy and delight
BY the by, in sending this consignment to
oblivion, do not include Bah.
He Igt1