Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-07-29
M'SWAT'S EXPERIMENT.
His Ingenious Scheme for Reducing House
hold ExpeDSeS.

nOlU Expenses.
Mr. McSwat went home one afternoon
a few weeks ago with something
wrapped up in a brown paper. He laid
1t on the kitchen table, but kept his
hand on it, as if it were mystery too
momentous to De unfolded without TAX
ing precautions against inficting upon
the sensitive nervous system of Mrs.
McSwat a sudden and unexpected
shock
well, blliger, what is it?'
Don't be in a hurry, Lobelia. All in
good time. have made up my mind to
try a little experiment | can hardly
call it an experiment, though 1t is
such an obvious, practical thing'that it
a wonder to me it hasn't been done for
a hundred years. | am going to show
you, Lobelia how to save money and
add to the comforts of life"
Mr.. McSwat then proceeded with
great deliberation to open the package.
He took off the string, rolled it up into
little coil, and gave it TO Mrs, Nc
Swat.
Its a good idea, Lobelia,' he said,
ito save every piece of string that
comes into the house. You may need it
some time"
She had bag full of similar coils
laid away somewhere, tangled into an
inextricable mass and running over at
the top, and had no use under the
shining sun for another inch of string,
but she promised to take care of this
particular wad. Meanwhile Mr.. McSwat
was slowly unrolling the bundle. He
brought to view at last beef's tongue.
There it u.s. Lobe1ia," he exclaimed.
81 don't see anything remarkable
about it, Billiger, except that it isn't
smoked"
"That's just the point madam" he
retorted. 1--WE got tired of paying
sixty cents apiece for smoked tongues
that look like a section of dried mon
keys forearm and taste as if they had
been dug up out of an Indian mound.
I'm going to smoke my own beef
tongues hereafter"
But how are you going to do it? We
haven't any smolse-house."
''Just you wait minute and you'll
see? Bring me an iron poker"
Mrs. McSwat hunted up the desired
implement and brought it to him.
Nov observe
He thrust the poker about half it's
length through the slit in the smaller
end of the tongue.
''Now come on, Lobelia."
He preceded her upstairs, opened a
back window, stepped out on the
kitchen roof and made his way up by
laborious climbing to tie comb, and
thence along to the chimney at the
farther end. Lifting himself carefully
up he placed the poker across the top of
the chimney, the beef-tongue hanging
down inside.
'"That's the scheme, Lobelia," he
said, clam bering back to the window.
It'll smoke the thing all right and save
just forty cents. Catch me buying
smoked tongues any more!''
But there's no smoke coming up that
chimney, Billiger," said his wife. eve
burn hard coal, you know"
''I'H fix. that. Well throw in a slab
occasionally, and if that doesn't make
smoke enough we'll burn a little soft
coal. They're both cheaper than bard
coal"
They went downstairs, and for the
next twentyfour hours or longer, in
compliance with instructions from Bill
Iger, Mrs. McSwat and the amiable do
mestic, Ophelia, piled the kitchen range
literally with slabs of wood and chunks
of soft coal.
On the morning of the second day
after Mr.. McSwat had put in operation
his grand scheme for saving money and
adding to the comfort of living he
climbed out to the chimney again, lifted
the tongue out and brought it down
stairs.
mo discount on this job, Lobelia, y
he said, holding it up. cts smoked till
you can't rest. Ever see finer looking
tongue than that?"
Doesn't it look a good deal shriveled
Billiger?" inquired Mrs. McSwat, dubi-
ously
"a smoked tongue always looks shriv.
eled. All you need to do now is tc
scrape it off nicely, peel off the skin.
and cook it.
Mrs. McSwat pulled the tongue off
the poker, laid it down on the table
and it broke in two.
1t was covered with thick deposit Oh
SCOT, was charred almost to the center
and from it's steaming interior came a
rich odor in which several distinct kinds