The record-union., 1891-06-24
MARVELLOUS DEFINITIONS.

The wide misapprehension that obtains
concerning the meaning of words in ordi-
nary and daily use is not often realized
But when those who aspire to teach our
o children come up to examination, and a
rather small class of them manages to
blunder thirty or forty times in half as
many minutes, one is apt to conclude
that more people do not understand the
meaning of ordinary words than is gen.
orally believed. Certainly one must set
tie to the Judgment that there is either a
scarcity of dictionaries or of good stock
for teachers.
There was class of ambitious teach
ing people before the County Board yes
terday in Sacramento, and they managed
to make thirty of forty blunders with a
facility unparalleled and that ought to
disgrace them. If people who claim to
be competent to teach cannot off hand
define correctly and fully every one of
the words given below, they are not quail
ifed for the Office they seek to fill. Of
course no one person made all the errors
we quote; they are the cream of all the
blunders committed by the class. But
we undertake to say that not one of them
should have been committed.
For instance, what right has any per-
son to a certificate of qualification as
teacher of any grade who defines obesity
as "a bow,' or the other person who said
1t was improper language" or the third
who defined it as courtesy" Choler
was defined as "to snatch; paricide as
killing something; billingsgate, as
water in the bottom of ship" defini-
ton, by the way, if inaccurate, at least
moving IN an odorOusly right direction.
Humidity was defined peaceful"
''calm''; caliber, lone who scribes': carl
cature, small in character" Environ,
the board was told by one, meant "envi-
ous," and by another "irritated." Our
Christian friends will not feel that the
person who defined demagogue as lone
that processes religion" is certain of
eternal salvation under present condi-
tons, and logicians viii be more amused
than amazed that a teacher should define
hypothesis as 'the longest side of a tri-
angle" Ingenious was interpreted to
mean grateful" and vitiate "to make
VITAL" and another gave to paper this
wonderful definition certain rules a per-
CT frn 1o,If 70 1,a Z
society" Doctors will be excited to
mirth by learning that in the opinion of
some one aspiring to teach the young idea
how TO shoot, mercenary means ''the
place where medicine is kept" and medi-
cant is one who Ideals in Medicines by
which token the physicians can poke fun
at the apotnecaries.
So the list runs on. Indigenous, mot
dignified'; arrogate, average; agrarian,
"a combatant"; and one wrote that anti
septic means "to take BEFORE" while allu-
vial means round" and cursory THAT
which is curse" This lastwas not. how
ever laughable, so bad as that of the as
piring pedagogue who defined benignant
as 'unciviliZed," nor so unpardonabIy
stupid as the candidate who gave a defini-
ton for nocturnal, by which it was de-
clared TO mean ''every three months"
Arabic was defined as "that which may
be read''; effervesee, respect; guerdon,
that which girds''; erratic, "rational";
hypothecate, 'to make ridiculous: pres
tige, put on extra work." and "a robe";
reciprocity, that which is brought before
the head'i urbanity, profanity; COM
pendulum, reference to writing" and so
on. But the best OF all remains, and we
submit that despite photographers, good
usage and all else, the ambitious one
brilliant genius was right who defined
celibacy as ''unsoundness of mind"