New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1891-09-18
YOU CAN BET ON 1T.

YOU CAN BET ON 1T.
Now from their rural outing
Come the summer boarders, shouting
Bout the siim-mllk and the alimentai JUNK
They have forcedy partaken,
OF the widowed pork and bacon
At the farmers In showhegan and squedunk'
They will drip with revelations
OF their wonderful privations. .,.
OF the s he beds 81 a Macsds e' 'S
or the meanness OF the Madam,
And the snakes that thr0 the porous h0onnS crept'
They will pratte of the chickens
That were tougher than the dickens
OF the pigs that Overran the parlor floor,
OF the wtngless little critter'
That doth Summertime cmhltter,
And of sunerings and miseres galore.
Yet It's safe to be predicting,
When again the springs evictins
And these very people pack their outing trunk,
You'll discover, II you eye them,
They'll unanimously HE them
To the farmers In Skowhegan and Squedunk.
-(BoSton Courier
The German Emperor has been measured for a new
crown. 1t win be made in the most approved fall
and winter shape. Some people think that this is an
unnecessary bit of extravaganza. They say the old
crown is just about as coed as new. and would do
very well for another season with little renovatng.
To be sure the Emperors head has increased in SIZE
that the old is little snug; but that difficulty
could be readily obvlaed by taking 1t to establish
mert which advertses Your Crown Blocked while you
Walt"
Shells that friend of yours whom you are eS-
He-About six feet two inches. Why do you ask
she-Because in that case shall have to dust the
ornaments on the top shelf.-(Der Schalk
Some jewellers in Chelsea, Mass, street are so
classical that they have peudoned the city govern
ment to academic" it.
whats all this fuss about the darning needles that's
in the papers now ?" asked wearied snburbante
OF another In smoking car the other morning. "Why
danlng needles" The other suburbante thereupon
proceeded to prop0und his views If the Eastern qes
lion, which did TO be much profound than
those OF the man who was wrought up about the
"darnng needles. '-(BOston Transcript.
According to Dr. Mofat, president of Queens Col
lege Galway Ireland of titles borne by Prince
Albert of irish origin. 1t arose. he
from no English town village Of Clarence but from
tho county OF Glare. The Dukedom Of Clarence was
created for Prince Lionel Of Edward III, who was
Viccroy Of Ireland in 1861 and bore with II the county
of Glare in fcf Through the marriage Of this duke
with an Irish princess, OF the old O'Conor family
and ancestress TO the RoscommOn oConOrs present
Queen derives Irish Blood, and has claim other than
of conquest ON the Irish throne.n
The Way Clear" Beg pardon, SIR" said the man
who had been standing up In the aisle Of the car az
he wedged himself down by the side Of man who
was trying 70 occupy two seats but have you ever
al have not, sir" gruHiy answered the party sd-
dressed.
pleasantly. You ought TO visit II. You would
have no trouble getting In now."-(Chcago Tribune.
The fund for the support Of the Protestant Episco
pal Bishop Of Massachusetts, is $o2Uo0 which. until
the present time has been invested at per cent thus
giving the bishop an income Of S6.44o year. The
managers of the fund declare that it Is longer
possible to invest 1t safely at per cent and com
mIttee has been appointed raise the fund to $3.50,
900, which, invested at per cent, would give Bishop
A 40 + a tod
that the amount required will be raised by individual
gifts and special contributions from parishes.
Bishop Newman during his missionary trip around
the world visited India and, IL Is told, addressed
gathering OF native pastors the best methods OF
carrying evangelical work. Native pastors accord
ing to tho missionaries, are apt 70 think they know
just what 70 do and perfectly qualified to get along
| without advice Bishop Newman began his talk but
constantly interrupted by the native brethren, who
| jumped up one after another TO remark that they
thought this tfat would be preferable Now, looh
here finally exclaimed the Bishop losing his paenct
little, any OF you think you can conduct thus meet
Ing better than can Val you please nseP There