davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Press., 1891-05-14

New York Journal of Commerce: We were present as child in 8 Connecticut town meeting where one, who was wiser and more thoughtful than his neighbors, had been urging change in the highway to avoid the climbing of steep round hill over which the only path out of the village fin one direction had been con- structed. The suggestion had been met with the plea that going around the hill would add so much to the length of the road. The venerable citizen brought in a large tin pail and placed 1t on the table in front of the deacon's seat, the orthodox
 meeting house" being the place of as- sembling. He then lifted the wire handle to its upright position and called atten- tion to it as an illustration of the highway which went up the steep pitch on one side to go down the other. He then let the handle drop on the edge of the pail, and asked, with 8 twinkle in his eye, If it was any greater distance around the handle when it lay down than over it when it was held up. He carried the day, and when the road was changed it was found that going around the hill on level had ac- tually shortened the way by nearly 300 feet.
The Press., 1891-05-14
COUNTRY GROCERY DIscUs
 ..-... SION.
BY SOCRATES SMITH.

BY SOCRATES SMITH. .,,v3s =. HIS head wuz full CT theories; be talked 'em by T the job; aila st 'GSsE1 Ss l<zrA His speech wen shened was one part corn an ninety nine parts cob .-&.S9sg. It sounded purty; some the boys they said twas { lest irnmense:5 ssfs@5 k4- s.ft a75. :-ssttz : 4The sounds all right, sez Ito them, ''but where Z in times the sense f"S 4z. He callea purtectton '.robDery," like all the s CoHnen school, EDs --- 3 erngOlden rule. &AE ,sb fist light ter rob your wife and kids," sez tel 2 him, fist right For foriner to get our work while we must starve q orn nghtap yas.sg ! SItis sound economy sez he, ito let the cheap
 est sell. ?.
 sez I, My friend, that barb brousrule would drag
 us down to hell. .,-s ..... ,. 5a.-. Ter purtect yer home and kimberly may be ( ! deadly sin ... But thems jest the kind CT sinners thet St. Peter sFree trade 'ud save fer you," sez he, ''on food aar cloeas nsrent.s sGsas5 tts+s~#4f aax \, 4Meat's dear t a cent pound f ye haven1
 got no cent. Free trade itrobs yer wallet an steals yer meal an corn,
 An'oners ye big bargain sales, wen all yer mon
 ey's gone"
 last him. "Wouldn't pauper find it purty mid
 dlin' hard
 To be.a dude with trouserin's at thirteen cents F yard7 We'd wear di mon studs fer buttons if they sol 5A lem -ffsr A nickle
 But if we had no money we'd be in the same ol pickle"
 sFFee trade Will usher in," sez he, ''the gran incidental age Forsecia ahy seers and prophets ez the worls grea1 1i heritage"
 Ssoh, wen the big mellenium comes twin be al { right" sez I, &--. ~a>e 'sW'en our rivers flow ith honey an our shade trees bloom 1th pie; :: Wen the angels drop down mama from thu
 bendin firmerment, An we hoR our hans an take it an don't hay,
 topay a cent; % s-4S @-=ss~ Wen food drops in our open jaws vile loafin' il the shade ..
 Wy then twill be bully time to inter1uce fre, = trade"
The Press., 1891-05-14

Rev. Prof. Charles s. Nash, of the
 Hartford Theological Seminary, is report
 ed to have accepted an appointment as
 professor of homiletics aud pastoral the
 ology at the Pacific Theological Semi
 nary Oakland California. Prof. Nash is a nephew of the late Dr. H. M. Knight of
 Lakeville, nephew of Col. Wilbur F.Coe of this village, husband of the late Miss Lulu Henry, 8 lady well-known to many Winsted people Ca niece of Ms. W. F. | Coe, at whose home she was married two or three years since), and besides all these relationships was shipmate of the editor
 of the Herald in 1876, on cruise down the Atlantic coast and up the Delaware river to the centennial exposition in Phil adelphia. He is one of the most promis- ing graduates of the Hartford seminary of late years-so the older professors say lis fine preacher, can play an organ like a professional, and can sing a great deal better than most ministers, and bet | ter than most other people, too, for that matter, and it is hardly necessary to add that the report of his intended removal Iunwelcome information to great many people.
 The above is from the Winsted Herald Prof. Nash will be remembered by many Stafford people as a grandson of Rev. MT. Knight, a former esteemed Congre- gational pastor in Stafford, also as having
 himself preached many times in Stafford while student in Hartford.
The Press., 1891-05-14

Not many physicians make great thera- peutic discoveries. For the most part they content themselves with administer ing 1adiciously what is prescribed in the books. To Dr.J. e. Aver, however. la due the credit of discovering that greatest of blood-purifiers--Ayer's Sarsaparilla.
The Press., 1891-05-14

It was very bad railway smash, and as they pulled one of the victims from the wreck they asked him how he felt, 70, all right. You SC I'm used to this kind of thing. I'm cyclist."
The Press., 1891-05-14

SAFE GUARD. ALWAYS ON DUTY.- Thousands make 8 practice of taking Dr. David Kennedy's Favofite Remedy, oi Rondout, N. Y., whenever they have symptoms of possible sickness, and through the prompt action of this remark able medicine they are never really. illl It is perfect safeguard against all forms of malaria, sick and nervous headache, palpitation, dyspepsia and heartburn.
The Press., 1891-05-14
Juliet Corson, in Harpers Bazar.} DINING WITH DISCRIMINATION

If one desires to dine with physiological discrimination, the meal should begin with few uncooked oysters or clans,
 which are immediately stimulating, nu- tritious, and digestible; both oysters and sea-fish contain tonic quantity of iodine, and are good nerve foods. With the ex- ception of cayenne, the earlier dishes should be mildly seasoned the entrees may become piquant gradually; the ice or Roman punch refreshes the tissues of the mouth and throat, which have been heated by the food and somewhat in famed or, rather, stimulated j. the liquid cooiness counteracts those feverish con- ditions, and prepares the palate for the flavor of the roast or broiled game. The accompanying salad greatly enhances the intense flavor of the roast, while the con- ailments and salad oil. favor digestion. The dessert sweets tend to regulate the the blood, exercising a chemical: action not yet thoroughly understood. Black coffee or tea without milk has an astrin. gent effect, that is,s it contracts the mu- cous membrane of the digestive organs, interfering with the flow of the gastric and intestinal fluids, and thus retardine indigestion. When their effect is desira- ble, the warmth and stimulus derived from either of those beverages can be re. placed by drinking Q glass of hot milk and water, swallowed as hot as possible, in large sips, and there is no handicap, as with the tea or:cofee.. The milk soothes the sensitive digestive tract, which may be disturbed by other foods, and the hot
 water is sanative; .ethe milk taken with out the water would become 8 solid food directly it encountered the gastric juice
 thus lacking the necessary liquid quantity Children not yet full growns and invalidf who are eonvalescing fayorably from some exhausting illness. should have 8 hbera
 diet in milk, eggs, fruit, vegetables, ana
 such digestible meat as mutton, or moi high game. --.--.-----..s -.-...----.-
The Press., 1891-05-14
SORRY WHEN HE FOUND OUT,

Hook here, E" said young man to the clerk of a big hotel on Broadway in the
 hearing of @ Sun reporter, "you'il have
 to change my room or else move that big, fat old man next to me to another part of the hotel He snores like steam en- zine" .@a fa f~ "Let me see," replied the clerk, "your
 room is 72, believe, sir?" 1"Yes, and the fat old man is IT." -'-' The clerk looked over his room list, and shadow of smile fiickered across
 his face. "Wait just moment, and I'll see about this, ? he said to the young man, and then he called hall boy and spoke to him in an undertone. ' "I've sent him up to see if another room is vacant, ," said he. "Ill move you at once. Bad weather we're having, is it not ?' '' fs'
 From this a conversation such as will sometimes take place between hotel clerk and guest ensued, in which various subjects were lightly touched on, and at 1 last the clerk called the guests attention to a frame of photographs that stood near, the photographs representing young act. l ress, who was at that moment playing al one of the city theaters " Most beautiful girl I ever saw" said
 the guest. liam ready to admit to the world at large.that worship her for hel
 loveliness and flor her art. Oh, she's sc
 dainty, so refined in all she does. She's like flower, you know, violet. Why
 I'll confess to you, I simply go to the
 theater where she is playing every night
 and to-day I could not resist sending a basket of flowers to her, just as a mark
 of perfect strangers esteem of her Oh she's an angel!"
 The hall boy returned and spoke to the
 clerk. The latter said: "Tll move you to 147, sir, on the other side of the house But do you know you were rather humor
 ously mistaken in thinking that the indi
 vidual that snored in Fl is fat old man. Well, isn't it ?" asked the guest. "Not exactly" replied the clerk. "Tha' | is the bedroom aof the beautiful actress
 whose pictures are over in that frame" "And she snores," gasped the young
 man. '. ,+,'..' ' l "Well, yours is the third complaint,
 said the clerk. And he laughed as the
 disillusioned youth went away with al haste in quest of a bracing drink.
The Press., 1891-05-14

A SAFE INvEsTMENT.-Is one that is guaranteed to bring you satisfactory re- suits, or in case of failure return of pur- chase money. On this safe plan you can buy from our advertised druggist a bottle of Dr. Kings New Discovery fore Consump- tion. It is guaranteed to bring relief in every case, when used for any affection of the throat lungs or chest such as consump- tion, inflammation of lungs, bronchitis, asthma, whooping cough, croup, etc. It is pleasant and agreeable to taste, perfect ly safe ,and can always be depended upon. Trial bottles free at Taft's Drug Store. 1 Well, good night, Miss A." said young man the other evening to a Bridge port girl whom he was visiting. II think its better for me to go. I feel certain that if stay two minutes longer I shall be indiscreet enough to kiss you"
 "Well, good night, Mir P. :" replied the girl. "Oh, by the way" she added, ''I want to show you my new sachet bag be- fore you go. It will only take a couple of minutes" e
 It is only necessary to state that the young man in question is the possessor of a bright intellect, and he quickly en- braced the situation, and we can further assert that the girl was in It.
The Press., 1891-05-14

F A girl in Kentucky has recovered $500 damages from a steamboat company for naming a boat after her without asking her permission, and they must rename the boat. She took offence at a marine item stating that 'sKittie Marshal took the lower chute and run her nose into a plantation"
The Press., 1891-05-14

The first congressional district is now composed of Hartford and Holland, the second of New Haven and Middlesex, the third of Windham and New London, and the fourth of Fairfield and Litchfield.
 As our total population Is 745, ,S81 each of the four congressional districts should theoretically have population of 1s8, ,485. As now constituted the figures actually
The Press., 1891-05-14

Puck: First Egg Gin dreadful suspense) What do you expect to be when you !F.4t. -r' v. ;'.A - -.s:-' fS grow up? s.J ts.tssi3s ..sf.tsl tsE} 91s 7
 Second Egg An omel elette and your :.
 First Egg w ell, don't know. Until this dreadful mystery as to my percentage is cleared np, I do not know whether to be spring chicken or q roast goose.
The Press., 1891-05-14

Mystic Press The new dress and enlarged form of the Stafford Springs Press speaks Of prosperity for it's publish CTS, Messrs. James and Lewis McLangh- lin, father and son. x The senior gentle man is one of C0nnecticut's older printers and editors, publishes . good paper, aud is highly esteemed by all who know him.
The Press., 1891-05-14

Youths Companion: Three elderly
 gentlemen, all college graduates, were
 discussing the effects of time in obliterat-
 ing early training at school. One of them,
 MT. A, asserted that they had all forgot
 ten nesrly everything they learned at
 school, and this the second gentleman, MT. B, as strenuously denied.
 "For instance, said MT. A to MT. B,
 "what do you know about geometry now Anything at all '" &' Certainly" said B, "a good deal."% stWell," said the third man, MT. 0 breaking in, "let's have little examina. tion. A, what Is the shortest distance between two points called?" ~5' "A railroad, said MT. A, promptly. Mir. B. laughed heartily. Hs &i ssWell, B." said 0, perhaps you car | tell me what the shortest distance be
 tween points is ?" 1->s ;. .s51r -=5 r,1at "A telegraph line, of course," said MT B, trinmphantly. .s $
The Press., 1891-05-14

The first chapter in a novel contained the following: And so the fair girl con- tinued to sit on, the sands, gazing upon the briny deep, on whose heaving bosom the tall ships went merrily by, freighted- ah, who can tell with how much joy and sorrow, and coal, and emigrants, and hopes, and salt fish.''
The Press., 1891-05-14
i Be man first, and then you can be gentleman at your leisure. -....-.

MILE's NERVE AND LIVER PILLs.-Act on new principle liver ,stom- ach, and bowels through the nerves. A new discovery. Dr. Miles Pills speedily care biliousness. bad taste, torpid liver, piles. constipation. Unequalled for men, women, and children. Smallest, mildest, surest. 50 doses 25c. Samples free at w. D. Heald's Drug Store.
The Press., 1891-05-14

Young Lady-You are the Chief Head Center of the Pullers and Haulers' Union in papa's factory, aren't you? Walking Delegate Yes, Miss. We'll, I'll give you a gold breastpin, 8 pair of diamond ear rings, two nice rings, a lady's watch and twenty-seven dollars, if you'll order the men to strike on the 1st of May. Eh What dye want us to strike for? Be cause papa was too busy at the factory to take us to Europe last season, and don't want him to have any such excuse this time
The Press., 1891-05-14
AMERICAN CITIZENSHIP.

MT. James, E. Boyd, of Omaha, and the people of Nebraska generally, appreciate now, probably better than they ever did before, the value of American citizenship. Mir. Boyd has been leading citizen of Omaha for many years, and is generally liked and respected. He has made mon- ey in Omaha, and has contributed not a little to the prosperity of that marvellous city The fact that he was not technical ly an American citizen was lost sight of both by himself and by his friends. The loose character of the laws concerning the franchise in Nebraska, as in other western states, allows aDehs to vote very soon af- ter their arrivalA qpon the smallest evi- dence of their intention to become Ameri- can citizens. Indeed, there Is reason to believe that the desire to vote itself is sometimes taken as evidence of declara- tion of intention to become citizen. It was on this, account, doubtless, that Mir. Boyd was allowed to hold the office of mayor of Omaha for several terms with out question.
 The govefporship, however, Is another matter, and Ve presume no one will deny that the governor of one of the states of the union ought certainly to be, both technically and practically, citizen of the United States.
 The highest court of the state of Me- braska has ROW declal ed that Mir. Boyd is not an American citizen, and hence is in- eligible to the governorship. He came to this country when minor, and his father never became natufalized.
 The case of MT. Boyd is interesting in more than one aspect, and suggests va rious lines of thought. In the first place,
 it makes clear the duty of every man who intends to be citizen to declare his in- tention and establish his legal rights. In
 the second place, it emphasizes the neces- sity for 8 more careful scrutiny of the credentials of voters and candidates, and
 should tend to the adoption by states like Nebraska of legal provisions requiring ! voters to be really citizens.
 American citizenship is not thing to 1 be lightly held. It is high privilege and
 honor. It's requirements by aliens should
 not be made so easy as to be held of little
 worth. The case of Mir. Boyd affords g good object lesson.
The Press., 1891-05-14

ERANKLIN HI. SAGE, Attorney
 II and Counsellor at Law, Room z, Warren's Block
The Press., 1891-05-14
H[:-:o'EsEnrN'
 N,oT'ICEl \ I

Having bought the Harness Business of F. N. Crane, solicit share of your patronage.
 I Ihave had sixteen years experience in both fill your orders satisfactorily if you will give me call.
 A full Line Of HORSE GOODS constantly on nahd SF3 s~
 REPAIRING OF ALL KINDS neatly and promptly done.
The Press., 1891-05-14

~ T. PRESTON, Counsellor at |Os Law, Notary Public and Real Estate Agent, Wilmington, Conn.
The Press., 1891-05-14
Highest in Leavening PowerU. Govt Report Aug ISSo
 RGNhI Baking .lVI essss,s 4s Powder .......sl-. p<0as rrEs>> a3sfnr gf
ABSOLUTELY PURE

During a recent examination a lawyer put the following question to Thomas A. Edison: Explain what is meant by the number of volts in an electric current p To which he replied:
 II will have to use the analogy Of a waterfall to explain. Say we have cur rent of water and a turbine wheel. If l have tur bine wheel and allow . thous- and gallons per second to fall from the height of one foot on the turbine, get a certain power, we will say one horse pow CT. Now the one foot fall will present one volt of pressure in electricity, and the thousand gallons will represent the am- p7re or the amount of current. We will call that one ampere. Thus we have a thousand gallons of water or one ampere falling one foot or one volt or under one volt of pressure, and the water working the turbine gives one horsepower. If, now, we go a thousand feet high, and take one gallon of water and let it fall on the turbine wheel, we have got the same PO"CA "O AUO UOAOAO, AbAAAOAys oAAO AAOACO- power. We have got thousand times less current or less water, and we will have g thousand volts in place of one volt, and we will have a fallsof water 2 thousand feet as against one foot. Now the fall of water or the height from which it falls is the pressure or volts in electric ity, and the amount of water is the am peres. It will be seen that thousand gallons minute falling on man at a height of one foot would be no danger to the man, and that if we took one gallon and took it up thousand feet and let | fall down it would crush him. So it IS not the quantity or current of water that does the damage, but it is the velocity or
The Press., 1891-05-14

FIFTY SpAsMs A DAY.-Had Mrs. Gard ner of Vistula, Ind, lived 2OOO years ago she would have been thought to be pos- sessed of evil spirits. She was subject to nervous prostration, headaches, dizziness, baekache, palpitation, and forty to fifty spasms day. Though having been treat ed by eight physicians for years without success, she was permanently cured by one bottle of Dr. Miles Restorative Nervine.
 A trial bottle of this new and wonderful medicine, and a finely illustrated treatise free at W: D.. Heald's Drug Store, who reenmmauf1s 1t n.s.--. s.ssslsse sssssS
The Press., 1891-05-14


 Fourth district, 2O3,3 The population of the second district is more than twice as great as that of the third. If Middlesex county now united with Hartford county to form a new first district and Holland county were added to the third the figures would stand: First district, 1S6, ,696 Second district, POS, BOA Third district, 146, 904 Fourth district, 203, 357 Such & encouragement would be a sub- stantial approach toward equality in pop ulation over the present arrangement, but it is entirely practicable to do much bet ter. By uniting Middlesex county and a tier of the eastern towns of New Haven county to the present third district and giving to the present first district the eastern portion of Litchfield county the ! four districts can be made substantially equal in population, and they will be t'composed of contiguous territory" This is question which deserves con- sideration and discussion. No political disagreements should stand in the way of | any possible improvement in our con- gressional representation.
The Press., 1891-05-14

T H.. REED, Attorney at Law, office O in Stafford National Bank Building, East
 Main-St.
The Press., 1891-05-14

2cn, ana DOW0lS bnfOuSn Uno u0TNcS. A new discovery. Dr. Miles Pills speedily care biliousness, bad taste, torpid liver, piles. constipation. Unequalled for men, surest. 50 doses 25c. Samples free at w. D. Heald's Drug Store.
 
 BUSINESS DIRECTORY. IA GENCY of Holland County Mutual "A Fire Insurance Co. at J. w. CHANDELIERS office at residence West tcorc-av, Stafford Springs ~ HI. HOBBY, Piano Tuner and |Ss Dealer in Pianos and Organs, Mansfield, Conn.
 ~ H. KING, Attorney and Counsel Os sellor at Law. Special attention given to pensions. Office over Leach's Clothing Store ~ T. PRESTON, Counsellor at Os Law, Notary Public and Real Estate Agent, Wilmington, Conn. ERANKLIN H., SAGE, Attorney l and Counsellor at Law, Room z, Warren's Block. l E WAYLAND PRESTON, Auc- N tioneer.
 IT E. PATTEN, 37 Wells-st., Hart 11s ford, Conn.,. Dyeing and Carpet Beating Works Miss M. T. Russell, agent, ,Staford Springs. Tx H. REED, Attorney at Law, office O in Stafford National Bank Building, East Main-st.
 IT. w. CHANDLER. Insurance and O Real Estate Agency, Stafford Springs. Of- flee at residence on WestfOrd Avenue. TOHN G. WIGHTMAN, Carriage eJ Manufacturer. Repairing in all it's branches. A large stock of new and secondhand work con- tVrYN hnr.<1 Nof0 nf fnf nFd MeLAUGHLIN & SON, Printers MI and Stationers. Good stock of Mercantile Papers, Envelopes, Bills Statements, etc, La La dies Fine Correspondence Stationery. At The Press Onice.
 c B. ME, Agent for Brown Bros. 'os Nursery Stock. P. O., Stafford, Conn. MIMI. A. COMINS, Horse and OK w Shoeing, Machine FOrgings and Repairing done to order. Also builder and repafrer Of all styles of Wagons South-st., Stafford Springs WTM. wOBBECKE, Merchant w Tailor, Room 1, Warren's Block, Stafford Springs, Conn. -'' r E MIDDLETON,
 DENTIST. Office Hours a. m. to 8 D. m. , sJ0EINstaN.ss BEoc1R.
 VEGETABLE vAPOR administered for pain less extraction. Perfectly harmless STAFFORD
 .-.s
 L
 48zzzdz11o0m}.
 DR. E. w. FINNEY. Office Hours, s a. m to D. m. Stafford Springs.
The Press., 1891-05-14
E WAYLAND PRESTON, Auc-

IT E. PATTEN, 37 Wells-st., Hart 11s ford, Conn.,. Dyeing and Carpet Beating Works. Miss MI. Russell, agent Stafford Springs.
The Press., 1891-05-14

want him to have any such excuse this time.
 < Plans for big tabernacle on the Will- mantle camp ground call for a fine look ing building which is now in course of construction. It is fifty-eight by eighty feet. with seating capacity of 1000, and has an open truss roof rising forty two feet from the ground floor to the apex. The building will be completed June 1, and dedicated Thursday, August 13, during camp meeting week, which opens Aug. 10. .,a What makes you color your lemonade red?" asked the curious old gentleman of the circus merchant. ''Great Seett!" was the indignant response, ''you don't ex- peet us to take money for clear water, do you?'
 Mrs. Jason-Jehiel, was there ever any such person as the fooLkiller? s MT. Jason-What idiotic questions you do ask. How the Dickens do know? I never met him. 'a f~% s=
 Mrs. Jason-Oh, I know that
 Wanted-Seme one to write up base ball game without getting in::- "The fea- lures of the game were," etc.
 :BUCKLEN's ARNIcA- SALvE.-The best salve in the world for cuts, bruises, sores, ulcers, salt rheum, fever sores, letter, chapped hands, chilblains, corns, and all skin eruptions, and positively cures piles, or no pay required. Guaranteed to give perfect satisfaction or money refunded. Price soc per box. Sold by E. K. Taft.
The Press., 1891-05-14

~ HI. KING, Attorney and Counsel Os sellor at Law. Special attention given to pensions. Offlce over Leach's Clothing Store.
The Press., 1891-05-14
BUSINESS DIRECTORY.

IA GENCY of Holland County Mutual "A Fire Insurance Go. at J. w. CHANDELIERS
 ,nice at residence, .orc-lv. Stafford Springs