The Wichita daily eagle., 1891-10-10
sUNFLowER sILHoUErrEs.
The last rows of summsr-eOrnstalks.

| The last rows of summer-eornstalks.
An Alliance man who is a deaf mute
would be an interesting object.
Charlie Gleed of Topeka is in the same
luck as Grover Cleveland. 1t is girl.
The year 1896 is year of great promise
for Kansas. This is the year PETER re-
tires.
One of the county fairs in Kansas was
so intensely agricultural that they used a
barb wire at the judges stand on the race
track.
Professor Garfield has slumped to the
| Alliance. Garfield is a man who is dis
tinguished for having SO many bright
| friends.
Waiter" said the Alliance orator fierce
| ly after he had just finished speech call
ing for blood, waiter, bring me piece OF
roast beef, and have it rare-very rare"
"There is one thing sure" said a man
who was bounding along at the end of a
rope to which wild bull was tied, them
dern Alliance fellers can't accuse me OF
being stockholder."
The man who has an inclination to clap
Senator Plumb on the back when he first
meets him, usually wants to take off his
hat TO him after he has heard him make a
speech.
Ex-senator Ingalls, personally announces
that he believes the Alliance wll last
until after the presidential election. In
gals is no longer prophet. He is plug
guesser.
The Kansas City Times has discovered
that ingalls, plagiarizes from the Congress
sional directory. The next thing and the
iridescent will be appropriating the Times
sheriff sales for his literary efforts.
1t cannot be denied that the proposed
statue of the late Sam Wood would be, in
the view of the mans dress and character
istics, unique enough, b ut if art is to re-
produce nature, the whiteness of marble
at once presents an obstacle.
A Democrat has purchased the Hutchin-
son News As rule what Democrats
Kansas has are we'll off financially. The
principle reason for this is that the large
Republican majorities have prevented
them from holding Office.
George Peck's objection to the Partisan
hotel is that a guest is given a candle to go
to bed by. The warm drops of hot tallow
on a mans bare skin are harmless. but are
not pleasant. Paris may have its advant-
ages, but in the matter Of light 1t can't
hold candle to Topeka.
They are telling a story of man out in
Stevens county who wants to be juror
in the Brennan case. When he was ques-
toned about his views on the case ne said:
~ want to see that man Brennan given
fair and impartial trial-but damn him,
he's got to be convicted"
A peddler in Lawrence stopped at a cot
tage and asked to see ''the lady of the
house"
Mrs Diggs, do you mean?" the girl
who opened the door asked.
"Ohl beg your pardon" exclaimed the
peddler. SIS this where Mrs. Diggs Ive?"
''Yes sir"
Indeed. Is Mr.. Diggs in'''
George T. Anthony was interrupted in
his speech at Burr Oak Monday by an ALI
ance man, and asked why the government
provides warehouses for whisky, but re-
jeats the sub-treasury, Mr.. Anthony
promptly silenced the interrogation, and
sent him home with his thinking cap on
'Oh, l came here armed" replied An
thony. Here" holding up statutes, sis
the law on whisky warehousing. 1t costs
10 cents a gallon to distill whisky. The
government taxes it 90 cents a gallon, aud
then the distiller builds warehouse and
the government permits him, under sur
veillance, to store whisky there, and the
of the tax is delayed during the
period of warehousing Now, if you want
your wheat taxed nine times the cost of
production, and if you want to build
warehouse for it, the government will
probably consent to let the tax rest unpaid
for time This is the whisky warehouse
law"
A group of men were talking on the
Union depot platform at Kansas City.
Gentlemen, " said one man with the air
Of shabby respectability about him. a
1uiet tone of voice aud modest way of
coughing behind his hand. gentlemen"
said he, ''you can ridicule Senator Peffers
,ales of destitution all you please, but l
know that he is right"
The crowd all grumbled and one man
,aid Rats
Il know you all don't like me to say
hat, gentlemen" continued the man, with |
ome sadness in his voice, "but PETER is
light"
There was the same suppressed grumble |
rom the crowd and the man who had said |
Rats" turned on bis heel in disgust.
'Peffer is right, gentlemen" he went |
N, "and know it, because l have done |
business in Kansas. Something is wrong |
radically wrong. Yes, sir. have
kimped and skimped My family have
zone without clothes and lived on the |
poorest food. have had no bad habits. l
Ion't smoke nor chew nor drink. Last |
week, gentlemen" the speaker faltered
lere, 81 made an assignment and cannot |
,ay nickle on the dollar. Something is
wrong in Kansas. gentlemen"
The group of men were taken aback.
they felt that the man had the best of
hem. Just then the man who had said
Rats" came up and asked: what busi-
less was you engaged inW
The little man coughed behind his hand.
81 was an undertaken"
-
THE FUTURE OUTLOOK.
rom the Live Stock Indicator.