Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-01-08
In the Breakers,

In the Breakers.
Everywhere there's CONSERVATION in the halls
of legislation,
And the leaders are perplexed,
For they fear the agitation will lead to disinte-
Hence they're vexed.
They regard the honest granger as the canine
in the manger,
And they fear him.
Will they treat him as a stranger, and increase
the present danger.
Or revere him?
He is very democratic. but in language auto
Might demand the richest plums
He may prove to be phlegmatic, grow exceed
ingly emphatic
Over crumbs.
This honest. earnest son Of toll, this splendid
product of our soil
Is in the swim,
And you will see red-hot broil unless fair
share of the spoil
Goes to himl
THE thief does not let his left hand know
what his right hand doeth.
GIRLS. there's real live genuine Count in
town. He's good fellow, too, but he's mar.
ried.
The druggists are kicking because drugs are
going down. Blame it on the doctors.
SPEAKER THOMPSON promises working
session of the Legislature. If he can deliver the
goods he will be called blessed.
LOOK at your $40 bills. A Colorado national
bank note worth SIS has been quadrupled by
l
growing nervous, however.
CONGRESS is going after the bucket shops.
This will make the dealers in options turn pale
A BALTIMORE bank cashier who allowed a
friend to overdraw his account claims he was
hypnotized At all events he closed the eyes of
the directors.
The willy Indian warrior stoops to conquer.
A STATESMAN who cannot draw bill can
draw his salary with neatness and dispatch.
THE Parnell-O O'Shea scandal is to be reopened.
| Canon O'Mahony seems to be loaded with mud.
THE spiritualists are struggling to obtain SUBJ
stance from shadows.
A Neglected L1ssie.
Singers sing of love and flowers
Pretty faces, finger tips;
Some have wasted precious hours
On sonnet to the lips.
But as vet no song or story,
No sublime poetic pearl,
Has resounded with the glory
OF the willful hired girl.
WHEN you have secret talk it over with
yourself. but nobody else.
IT is easier to call man liar than to nail a
| lie.
THE ghost dance has been transformed into
| q rifle ball.
THE first business in order after the Legisla-
| ture met on Tuesday, was a raid on the Treas
| ury by Philadelphia members who wanted to
| draw their pay In advance. Money is very
| tight and campaign expenses are heavy in the
| Quaker City.
A TENNEssEEAN l07 years old has just been
married to spry old girl of 80. This is a won
| derful age.
THE thicker the smoke the longer the pay.
| rolls.
| THERE are two things which Legislator
| will take without murmur: Recess and pay
| BANKS have tellers but when the cashier
| doctors the books they never tell on him.
| NATURES laws are harmonious, and human
| laws should be.
| 1T was cold day in Harrisburg after Allie.
| gheny county got left.
THE Canton watch firm may keep their
works moving, as the creditors are lending it a
helping hand.
THE hotels of the city are full to overfowing.
| and cots are at a premium. This is a healthy
| sign.
| A BILL for the condemnation of Some of the
levees is ready for the Legislature. If II
| ters for their old wagons, scrap and lumber.
| OCEAN vessels always carry some tip top fel.
lows.
You cannot Judge note by its face, but the
| back tells the story.
| THERMOMETERS work under Q sliding scale.
WILLIE WINKLE.