The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-05-11
BRIGHT BITS.

HE-Do you belong to the Psychical Society!
She-No, bat ] sometimes go cut on my
brothers machine.-Puck.
A SKETCH headed The Soldiers Feeling in
Battle" is going the rounds. He generally felt
for the place he was hit, if be happened to get a
dab. - air hduet Herald.
LEIsuRELY TRAVELLER emerging from wash
rooml-Well, it's your turn, sir.
"Next"-If I'm as long about it as you, it'll
be my 'ternity.- OurMOnthIV.
CLARKsoN thinks that Harrison lacks electri-
cal power. But look out for coTuscation in
case live Blaine wire should drop across the
Presidents circuit. Boston Post
GALL Hohenzollern princes are baptized with
water from the Jordan" They are? Thunder!
We thought all along that they were baptized
with beer Kentucky State Journal.
SoBERLY-Do you believe, Wiseman, that
there Is luck in horseShOes?
Wiseman-If there is it stays in 'em. Inever
knew of any coming out of 'em.-BoSton Cou-
rteT.
NoBBsrE. the office boy There's a man down,
stairs says he's goin' to kill yer and beautiful
young lady as wants to go on der stage.
Manager-Well, show the man up.-BrOoklyn
Life.
YES PARENTS. keep your children from bad
company. 1t was bad company that caused
brother with base ball bat,-Kentucky State
Journal
GILHooLY-This world is full of misery. The
happiest man is the one who is never born.
Hostetter McGinnis-Yes, but there isn't one
in million that has such streak of luck
Terds SiftingS.
If there is anything that makes a girl feel
bad it is to have the young man send her photo
graph back after the engagement is broken,
and not be able to find the trace of single kiss
upon it.-SOneruIlle Journal
MATURE rarely wastes, but sometimes she
does said Mehtable at the circus. Look at
the elephant. for instance, Two tails prac-
tically, and yet with a hidsl absolutely imper
vious to flies, "--Nele York san.
THE character of man is told
BY the way his jaw runs ill.,
So, too, woman may be judged
Quite easy by her chin.
philadelphia Times.
o GRIP microDe, pray hear me speak,
List to what advise;
The next time you victim SEEK
Take some one OF your size.
The Continent.
"MERcy MEn said Miss Passee, az sincerely
hope they will not pass the law making day of
eight hours"
"WhY not"
Just think how rapidly we shall age Just
| three times as fast. '--Hd per's Bnzdr.
DE TAG-we had amateur theatricals one
night on the steamer coming over.
De Jagl-Were they successful?
De Tag-Well, no; in the middle of the play
the steamer gave a lurch, and all the actors ran
to the rail and threw up their parts. Smith
Grdy Monthly.
GOVERNMENT INSPECTOR in the Prson-And
what brought you here, my man?
"A cold, your honor. You see, was just
climbing into the window all right, but had
| such cold could not help sneezing, and so
the gentleman walked up and caught me, and
here l ann tiegende Bidtter.
did you ever meet a real pirate?" asked the
| young lady.
"Yes," replied the old navy officer; "once on
| the coast of Maine"
"How delightful! And did he live on sloop
| pointed black?''
mo. He kept a summer hotel. "-Nep York
| Recorder.
QUEsrER-They tell me that Battin, your
| base ball friend, has concluded to adopt the
| ministry as profession.
Jester-So am told. He ought to be able to
| pr acl a sermon that would please the masses.
Quester-What makes you think so?
Jester-Becauss he's such a famous short
| stop. Dos ton Courier,