davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1891-10-02
Reviving a Drowned Man.

A man, while fishing, suddenly fell
into the water A fellow fisherman of
benevolent aspect promptly helped him
out, laid him on his back, and then be-
gan to scratch his head in a puzzled
way. whats the matter :" asked
the bystanders. "Why don't you re-
vive him p There are sixteen rules
TO revive drowndcd persons" said the
benevolent man, "and | know 'em all;
but | can't call to mind which comes
first" AT this point the rescued man
opened his eyes and said family: us
there anything about giving brandy in
the rules ?" eyes" Then never
mind the other fifteen" london
Fi1drO.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1891-10-02
SullsCrintion Ilnus

DR.. Tuckerinau, editor of The Work
man, Cleveland, has taken somc pains to
collect and compile the decisions of the
United States court on this subject. and
gives to the Washington Post. as the
result Of his Investigations, the follow
ing:
First-Subscribcrs who do not give express
notice 10 the contrary are considered as wishing
TO renew their subscriptions
Sccond-If subacribers order the discontir,,
ancc OF their periodicals. the publisher may con.
unue TO send them until all tho arrcarni,cs arc
paid.
ThiriIf Subscribers neglect or refuse "a
take their periodicals from the poetoncc "a
which they arc directed, they are responsible
until they have sottled their bills and ordered
thcm discontinued.
Fourth If subscribers move 20 other places
without informing tho publisher, and the pa
pc;r aro sont to tho former address, they are
h&ad responsible.
Fifth-Thc courts have decided that refus.
ing TO take periodicals from the otficc or re-
moving and leaving them uncallcd for Is prima
facto evidence OF intentional fraud
Slxth-If subscribers paid in advance they
are bound to givo notice at the end OF the time
IL they do not wish to continue taking IT.: other
wise the publisher Is authorized to send Ii, and
the subscriber will be responsible until ex.
press notice, with payment of all arrcaragcs. ID
sent To the publisher.
The latest postal laws are such that
newspaper publishers can arrest any one
for fraud who takes paper and refuses
to pay for it. Under this law the man
who allows his subscription to. run along
for some time unpaid and then orders i,
discontinued, or orders the postmaster
to mark it refused" and have postal
card sent notifying the publisher, leaves
himself liable to arrest and fine the
same rs for theft.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1891-10-02
Do You Cough?

Don't delay. Take Kemp's Bal
sam, the best cough cure. 1t will
cure your coughs and colds. 1t will
cure sore throat or a tickling in the
throat. 1t will cure pains in the chest.
1t will cure influenza and bronchitis,
and all diseases pertaining to the
Lungs because it is a pure Balsam.
Hold it to the light and see how clear
and thick it is. You will see the ex-
cellent effect after taking the first dose.
Large bottles soc and 81,
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1891-10-02
That Baby of Mine,

Auntie, three months ago had the salt
rheum SO bad that his head was a
mass of sores, and had begun to lose
all hopes Of raising him, but my drug
gist recommended Sulphur Bitters, and
to-day he is as fat and clipper as any
baby you ever saw, and he has not a
sore on his head, and just think that
after paying out so much, that few
dollars worth of Sulphur Bitterslshould
cure him.-Mrs. j. e. UdU, Lo,ceU.
To-, 2t
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1891-10-02
The Boy Gould Discriminate.

"And how old are you, my little
man ?" said Detroit gentleman to a
youngster he met on Michigan Cen
tral train, the other day.
ask years old he promptly replied.
"Any brothers or sisters ??
"Yep. sister"
"How old is she ?"
'She's 6"
''rhen you must be twins"
course we is. Didn't think We
was trplets, did ye 3"-Detrom Free
Press.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1891-10-02
The Country Editor.

He can live without towels,
Live without soap,
Breakfast on vowels,
And dine upon hope:
He can live without galluses,
Live without shirts,
Keep a kicking despite
All manner of hurts
He can manage to get on
Without advertisers, .
But the editor cannot
Survive without scizzors.
.SutnY South
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1891-10-02
Now Try This.

1t will cost you nothing and will surely do
you good, if you have Cough, Cold, or any
trouble with Throat, Chest or Lungs. DR..
Kings New Discovery for Consumption,
Coughs and Colds is guaranteed to giverelief
or money will be paid back. Sufferers from
La Grippe found it just the thing and under
its use had speedy and perfect recovery.
Try sample bottle at our expense and learn
for yourself just how good thing it is. Trial
bottles free at c. A. Kleim's Drug Store.
Large size sos, and 500.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1891-10-02
Pay the Printer.

When storm cavorts around your door,
And you, by light of taper,
Sit closely by the evening lire
10 read your country paper.
Just think OF him whose work thus helps
To wear away the winter,
And put this question to yourself,
~Iinve paid the printer"
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1891-10-02
Be Your Own Doctor.

1t won't tcost you one half as much.
Do not delay. Send three two-cent
stamps for postage, and We will send
you Dr. jKaufman's great work, fine
colored plates from life, on disease, its
causes and home cure. Address, A.
P. Ordway & Co., Boston Mass. 1912
at.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1891-10-02
Not a Fair Deal.

Bell Boy "You gave me an old pair
of trousers this morning that you said
YOU didn't want, and I thanked you
for them.'
Guest. "Well, what of it? p
Bell Boy. Iwant you to take back the
thanks. l have just found out that
you didn't leave anythingin the pocket.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1891-10-02
CONTINUED NEXT WEEK.

A fact that all men with gray and
many shaded whiskers should know,
that Buckingham's Dye always colors
an even broom or black at will +
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1891-10-02

Constipation, Lame Back and
Headache it proves its worth in one
dose as it will cure the worst cases of
Bilious troubles. Manners Double
Extract Sarsaparilla can be given to
children as we'll as to adults. Mrs.
Thos. Morton, of Avoca, Pa. says that
1t is the best for constipated children.
For Pimples, Boils, Rash and Eczema
it cannot be beat. For Erysipelas,
Scrofula and Salt Rheum it has no
equal. Once tried and it proves the
home friend. If your druggist does not
keep it, have him get it for you, and
you will never regret it. For sale by
all druggists, also at Meyer Bros,
Wholesale & Retail, Druggists. Price
soc a bottle.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1891-10-02
EVERY PATRIOT

should read good newspaper. In the selection
OF a newspaper many considerations should gov-
ern. First, It should be one that endeavors TO
give all the news without prejudice, 1t should
be neatly printed on good paper. II should be
independent-in favor OF all that is good, up
right, clean. Such a newspaper is
The Patriot,
printed In Harrisburg. 1t is under new manag
ment-enlarged, handsome, bold in the right
fearless In denouncing wrong is always and
unswerylngly Democratic. 1t Is the only Dem
ocratic newspaper at the State Capitol. 1t makes
speciality or Department News. II is the only
paper in Central Pennsylvania that receives
and prints full Associated Press Reports, 0
tained by it over its own wires. 1t presents each
day Special correspondence from all points trb-
utary TO Harrisburg, all the Harrisburg News
Fashion Notes, Household Hints Domestic II .
cipes, Society Gossip, Scientific. Humorous and
Political A. .lcles, Short Stories and Sketches.
It's Market Reports are com 'lete, both as to FL
nance and Commerce. Its 1--we stock Markets
are prepared specially for THE PATRIOT, and
have only been successfully Initiated by one
other newspaper in the State. The Saturday
sermon OF Rev. Dr. Spurgeon, OF London, is a
great feature. ..t..t ~.
THE PATRIOT wants the rascals turned out or
locked up. TO this end 1t heartily urges the
election or Wright and Tilden as the only means
To stop the plundering OF the public treasury.
THE WEEKLY PATRIOT, s pages, is only 81
year. 1t maintains The best features of the
daily, including the Spurgeon sermon. First
take your home paper, then It. Send foe circu-
lars and sample copies qree) of either daily or
weekly.
Liberal rates for campaign or otherwise.
Address,
THE PATRIOT COMPANY.
ID, A. ORR, PRESIDENT, HARRISBURG, PA.
JOHN &. ORR, TREASURER. --SC.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1891-10-02
PATENTS.

Caveats and Trade Marks obtained, and all
Patent business conducted for MODERATE
FEES.
OUR OFFICE Is OPPOSITE THE L. S. PAT
ENT OFFICE. We have no sub-agencies, all
business direct, hence can transact patent busi-
ness In less time and at Less cost than those re-
mote from Washington.
Send model, drawing or photo, with descrip-
ton. We advise if patcntable or not, free OF
charge. our fee not due TIL patent is secured
A book, "How 10 Obtain Patents with reier.
ences to actual clients in your state, county, or
town, sent free. Address
G. A. SNOW & CO., Washington, ID. c.
Opposite U. S. Patent Onlce.l
Telegram-herald. ([Grand Rapids, Mich.) 18??-1892, 1891-05-23

VIM woekmen wcre digging near the
hfllsSds above McKecsport Saturday they
struck e . depth Of twenty-five feet pe-
cuiiar looking body that had been I'M
earthed BY the blasting OF The rock. Il at
first rcsemblcd vein Of dark clay or shale,
bot on cioss examination 10 was found
that IL was covered with scales. The In
tsress Of the workmcn was aroused. and by
careful digging they finally unearthed q
stone body twenty-eight feet long and
tApering AZ both ends A close examina-
ton showed IL was that OF an enormous
reptile that had become petrified.
The tail end was first found. and twenty.
five feet OF il have been taken ont. but the
head il Jet imbedded In the rock The fcs-
oil rested in fssurc in the solid rock. and
about it were also discovered dead leaves.
The remains have been seen by . nun Der
OF responsible PEOPLE. who win take care OF
them for further examination
This End recalls the famous McKeesport
snake that bad been seen In the vicinity
many years ago, and which was described
by those who had seen is as being over
twenty-five feet long. The snake was last
seen abrris twenty five years ago. and there
are people still living herr who say they
hare seen IT, There Is 20 doubt the body
iuss found Was thst ~ an enormous snake.
and 10 Is thought TO havs been the same ~
the one which created such fears years ago.
-Pistsburg Dispatch.
Telegram-herald. ([Grand Rapids, Mich.) 18??-1892, 1891-05-23

r~sH; Dot tsaA's2ayuss. 'hcuses~rythisz
"a. barnt II ] MIA tbs .sS<ex~ 10 give
thai by sch nekia' = hs eoaida's
stan"
what forrs ssAsd shs tns~pesna Jerry.
ssWhy. fur .-tIla' tAs barn axiss. = "a.
The rselY. but thssei farso& Ter tsii se
's.sas tl.aE part of II. Ne se~ tho .qaAre :
boy-xssAx loagh bead he found an ON
sesssn' CA ,he Fistso iole. &ss4i -. ~ opaFs-.
le hs.i Ter sboes Al it
.swsI, Ale barn wtndcrwas cf.sn. "a chs
xun~aa went right later tbs Asynow. IA
t.aaE li>e minutes aicFe Iva. all a -hlaz.
Ia. Every BID, tarss<.i cat. and 90 SGT on.
tho oId A4ss. IA then hill Ire<sx sail's-
aud ga thseh man ~eat GA with hons
ss-5ry. gistas sssrY detail VI what waz
aoae. sad AID thought by each Que wAa
was pr..sns as she fise<
whsa az lAsG tho story wss ended oil,
Jerry rvsnAinui for sosvsal usllato~ al
leatiy fneiitassng on what be haAi heard
than be .adsisniy looked ap aud Erasciy
sak~i. "pid 20 cay whether tic Ivy kiiie>l
tho owis'-xouth's Companion
Telegram-herald. ([Grand Rapids, Mich.) 18??-1892, 1891-05-23

- Oo00k8l 1oooo0BOr Ae0nt'0 StOTN
Colonial A @. Dawes IL general passenee.
agent Of . system Of western roads with
headquarters In st. Joseph. Mo. Before
tho days Of the interstate commerce law
tho colonel was easy OF access to the editor,
who waSaiways in need Of transportation.
One night he was called out OF bed by one
Of tho profession. who informed the colonel
that be, the editor. was broke, and that he
kzd received . telegram from home an
nouncing family sickness, and that he was
expected to leave on the firss train The
colonel took out map and saw that the
p<tce o< q tackes % tho point Of destination
was about SlH He handed the editor a
two dollar bin, explaining that ho had no
blnkA As tho editor left tho colonel
th0uxhtof him In every way except the
o0mptmentAxy way. and hoped he would
nover look onzehe mans face again.
Two years later q bin was before the leg.
fsfn1Uxe Of Missouri In which the colonel
I'D an Interest," He was there TO put the
msrs through. In casting about for
sn1ancsAecame upon the country edi.
t@vhom- e.had favored and asked him il
he could b Of any service. Tho editor
TUNED in hnd through his influence the
insure was paced. "It wss a lesson to
M usver forgot" said the colonel
sIs taught mo to never despise tho day of
man things The man whom / could
hsv0 kicked into the street for what
thought IN impertinence turned out to Be
IN angsl Tribune.
Telegram-herald. ([Grand Rapids, Mich.) 18??-1892, 1891-05-23

punchss are nos favortss sxrsrs With .
few animals. though rabbits fancy tAssa-
Never cus yoar eerus with = sharp in
ssrumsnt This - ~ best bat temporary
rellef
The United States has referred thirty
three iueernafionai dssratca % arbitration
during the present. century.
All the letters Of the ALPHABET appear IN
IN the following santence. "rhe quick
brown fox jumpa over lazy dog"
A child three year> old has actually been
carried on by "a eagle near Trenosin. in
Hungary. In sight Of the father and mother.
A citizen Of ST. Louis Is said to make =
good living by renting turtles TO rcstaa-
rants for advertising purposes.
On dark nights white light can bc seen
farther than any other color; on bright
nights rcd takes the frss placA
MrxI Worth, tho wife OF tho famous Pa
risian drcsszraksr. dresses very plainly. lt
goes TO prove tho truth of an old provcrb
Lady Burton's revised version Of Sir
Richard Burton's TRANSLATION OF the cara
biau Nights" Is the edition from which
the exemperor Dom Pedro Is making a
Portuguese translation
Rub together one tablespoonful Of butter
and three OF -four. Roll this into the up
per crust of pies. 1t will render the crust
fiaky and tender.
A Boston society woman says 1t il quite
fad among Boston young gentlemen to
take up the practice OF veterinary surgery.
The same thing is noted in Washington.
In arrnorplate tests steel has generally
been found 10 compete more successfully
with compound armor when the plates
were eighteen inches thick than when they
were only twelve inches thick.
Previous to the emancipation act OF 1893
Roman Catholics were excluded from cor
porate offices, from parliament. forbidden
, to marry Protestants or to carry arms. and
were under various other disabilities.
1t IL well known that vegetable and ami
NAL oils are unsuitable for cylinder lubri-
cation, and recently in France where coiza
| oil was used it was found necessary To
burn out the deposits in the ports of the
| locomotive cylinders.
Telegram-herald. ([Grand Rapids, Mich.) 18??-1892, 1891-05-23
srnlcs or CAR SEAT sslasHsssa
Why . vss csn.e-a D-<s 49, s.ss =

WIZ . vur esls.rss Dsss No. naas -
Ma. r~s sss.asas n~y~sa nis owo-
s<ryfunny % sec . s<k1sa man IN
ala presene k-~p yuer-ssas sra OF efsy
travel Laooring - establish syss~m "
ssoles. or wat my frssnd jiaks calls co.
aaelle, which vii satisfy a uneasy eaa-
science
SON After O'Clock tia oshsg svsning .
crowded laird avenue car train we1s
north~ar,t. and - - always the CASE.
there were more men tkAn women sssxiax
A1a naors women shAnmsn standing
Among the latter we're three Grand
stress shop girls-ioad mnnshesi. slaagy
and prsssy. Tn<y nAds. ~ s<crcs-ef what
thsy Thought Of The msn Who woold nos
riss and give them ehskr .snxz Il was not
Complimentary.
At Twcnty-thfrf ssrsss . remarkable
specimen II humanisy-oneof your zznoota
faced. eigasss<s smoking. fur cotlAred
trioe-hAsing reached tho end Of has ride.
arose, and with IN elaborate smile offered
his seat TO one Of tho giria. A nineta
fooeed man near By slipped insDtI EVERY
body laughed bar the girts and tho dude
The latter turned . look upou the en-
croAcher which was calculated ~ crash
kIm 10 earth 50 thai he would BOZ rise
again. and - he passed she mAadens saad
with depressing air.
THAT fellow Is an awful cad-an awful
cad"
He's got face" said one Of the shop
girls, and AL three collected about the cul-
prit and proceeded TO pass high favored
remarks about him, which no listened 70
Win apparent amusement
SsunS With indignation. . young man
xitting next TO him got up and Cs -ons OF
chs girls his seat
Another man who had not thoaght OF
giving up bis own seat turned around and
said:
"Yoa ought 20 lie ashamed Of younelfl
You had no right Co tina. sat. A man can
do with his seat what he chooses"
That's what did. /" said the culnri. an-
blushiDgly. Il SAT- in IT,"
-Iou ought 10 ne ashsmed"-
"Oh, give Us a restF' cried another pas
senger Get mp and give the lady your
own SCAT II you are 80 troubled about It."
Indignant passenger subsidies.
By this time Mr.. Dude, feeling that he
had made rather q neat exhibition OF him.
sels, got near TO the door, when . strong
hand was laid on his collar He turned
and saw a very angry workingman looking
into his eyes,
..See here. said the lstter In tone which
made tho fur lined fraud quail, I've .
good mind to black your eye for you"
.Wawawhat IS the nattsrs" gasped the
fellow.
The idea Of your trying to do the purity
after riding all the way to your own sta
ton. You deserve = cowhiding. No, you
don'ti Yell ride 10 the next station"
And amid the plaudits Of the entire car
ful the indignant workman gave the fur
iined collar twist that made Its ownel
black In the face, and would not let him
OF unit, the train reached Thirty-fourtt
street, two stations beyond where be want
ed TO go.
AID
Telegram-herald. ([Grand Rapids, Mich.) 18??-1892, 1891-05-23
.at.I.....msat.

Is one which is guaranteed Ia bring
you satisfactory rsturns. at An cast OF
failure return OF purchase price. oti
tins safe plan YOU can buy from our
advertised druggist u hottie OF pr.
Kings New Discovery Tor consumption.
10 10 guaranteed ~ lring relief ia every
case, when used for any affection of
Throat. Lungs or Chest. such as Com
sumption, Inflammation of Lungs. Bron-
chitis. Asthma. Whoop!ng Cough,
Group. etc, etc. II Is pleasant and
agreeable 10 taste, perfectly safe, and
can eiways ho depended upon. Trial
bottles 10 cents, at Peek Brokers' drug
stpYa
Telegram-herald. ([Grand Rapids, Mich.) 18??-1892, 1891-05-23

II Is singular how the oopybook tsrts Of
orr childhood do occasionally Get a sewers
contradiction In after yesrs. yor instance.
on Monday va obliged to spend an hour
or more in the of1se and eosn>any q one
Of cha most sscceasfBi businss men Ia De
trois. Order u Heavens f.ssf lay" eanis
into my mind the fnstAns ! glanced over
his ae-k and around the rom. Tbs desx
wss litter 81 penhosdsrs and psns. Ia.
srapru. p>nciiS cards. paper weights,
nuciiaer bottles, spoois Of tabe. seats.
wsess1one. n pair Of ssissors. letters and
epufxsrf~ fled and not nied. ed add ne
calendars, bioefins pads and - sb- The
ofy,cs loohed ~ though IL hs, Bss bera
dasted - swept m q DontA. &nd yse cheek
boots and niez ali>d vfsh bonds asd mort
g.e-s told thai ths man was saass.sfsi Ia
= saasnann var Whist bss this ~ 10 with
Aesvens Why sks fnaa In sss=sisa l. .
vevy proxaiDsus nesaf~y u . very brsSas-
eat ehunA -D~tross yrss bfssA
Telegram-herald. ([Grand Rapids, Mich.) 18??-1892, 1891-05-23
lie: 10 il too late. ~


An Elaborate Luncheon for children.
One OF the favored small folk OF this op-
ulent city was the recipient not long ago of
n luncheon which must have been q de-
light to her and the other wee ones who
graced the feast. The guest Of honor was
lovely four year-old with golden hair and
big brown eyes, and the dozen little ones
asked to meet her counted their years, the
eldest of them. not more than twice as
many For this company OF tender ago
the table showed hank Of varicgated hya-
cinths through it's center. Wax lights
with shades to match the parti-colorcd
flowers added TO the brilliancy % pleasing
to the childish eyes.
At every plate stood . miniature pot
swathcsi In q Chinese napkin in which was
growing small hyacinth. and by it, side a
lovely doll, whose gown exactly matched
the hue Of Its companion flower. This
Kaleidoscope OF color and gifts brought adj
miring "Ohsi' from every separate small
girl az she took her seat.
The ssgsible mother who provided the
Luncheon deserves record for the menu.
which included bouillon. crcamed oysters.
brdi~i chicken, oolored jeIiiea. Ice cream,
small cakes. not rich, aud chocolate. The
last course Was q Jack Iiorneg pie--thls
ons showing. 10 match the bsSlesuin
luncheon. top gay with many colored
fan. 81 tissue paper. each 81 which dnly
rssoived itself into plum" Of acceptable
shaSe 60 IL delighted l.oSse<sor Her Point
- tlaw ia New York Times
Telegram-herald. ([Grand Rapids, Mich.) 18??-1892, 1891-05-23
Mss.t o,..

We desire to SAY 10 oar citizens that
for years NC have been ceiling br.
Kings New Discovery for Consumption.
nf. Kings New I.lfe Pills, hueklen's
Afniea asslse aud Eioeissa Elglefs. and
have never handled remedies thai sell
a. we'll, ar that have gwen such utsi.
scrsai satisfaction, We do not hesl.
tate "a guarantee them every time, and
We stand ready 90 refund the purchase
price II satisfactory results 10 not FOL,
low their use. These remedies have
Won their great popularity purely Oh
shci. merits. Peck hrus., druggists-
Telegram-herald. ([Grand Rapids, Mich.) 18??-1892, 1891-05-23

Katie was going to bed after a day of
toll minding her sick and MANNED dolls
chrouic invalids all of them-and her
beautiful duck, the one old quaker
that Travelled with the hens because he had
no better company. The robin that had
been watching her out OF the corners Of his
bright eyes, as he ran over the lawn and
listened to her prattle, was asleep already
with his head under his wing, and Katie's
hung heavily on mothers shoulder as sho
was undressing her. "Now lay me- had
been said, with many yawns in between,
and mammals pet had been tucked in
snugly; but just rs the sleepy eyes were
closing she sat suddenly bolt upright
Mamma" sle said, 81 want Johnnie's
picture book-that with the lambs"
"Hush, Kat er' said her mother, the
least bit ws>-ily. for the little feet and tho
little tongue had never ceased going one
moment all day. "Now we will 60 to
sleep"
"But, mamma" and the big eyes pleaded
earnestly, cant have Johnnie's picture
book this onst,"
Mot tonight, dearie: IL il too late"
Mamma" said Katie, sitting up very
straight and looking very solemn indeed,
II heard a story Of q little girl-she was a
good little girl-that asked her mamma
onst when she was put to bed for the pict-
ure book with the lambs, and the mamma
told her she couldn't have it, and-and"-
the baby voice fell to an awed whisper and
tho eyes grew very big-'in just-about-
two-rlinutes-she was dead"
"My. Katiel And what killed her 90
quick"
because" said Katie with conviction.
because she didn't get the book"
Sho got 1t, and In five minutes was asleep
with it in her arms.-Harper's Young
peooIe