davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1891-09-25
DON'T MARRY LITERARY MEN. :

The moral for ladies is, Don't marry
literary men," The marriages of authors
have been wretched out of all proportion
to The common lot The reason is not
only that authors are vain and irritable
aud Eighty and absorbed like artists in
their work. The true or chief cause of
married misery among writers is prob
ably this: They do their work at home.
Now, bricklayers, soldiers, doctors, bar
risters, clerks and most men do their
work away from home. Domestic
troubles about servants, children, butch
ers, dressmakers, cannot be launched on
them while they are occupying their bus
mess.
Nor do they,in turn, bring pre-occupa-
ton with briefs, or bricks, or clients, or
what not, into their domestic circle.
But Mrs. Literary Man is apt to rush in
upon the solitude OF Genius with some
terrible tale from the BAKERS" while
Genius, when summoned to his meals,
has his head full of rhymes, or of the
persons in his novel, or, TO take Mr.. Car
lyle's case, of Frederick the Great or o.
liver Cromwell. His mind is absent
when he should be lending the pleased
ear to feminine pIati'e, and, later, when
examined therein, he is miserably pluck
ed Heis convicted of not having attend
ed to what was saba crime of insult.
dare say Mrs. Carlyle often found Mr..
Carlyle an unconcerned and impatient
nearer of her witty conversation, where
as lie did listen when away from home
in country house TO Lady Ashburton.
Hence these tears of Mrs. Carlyles, and
and the condolences which she inflicted
on Mazzini and others. The unlucky
pair, as Ors. Carlyle said, had thinner
skins than other people, and were pro-
fusely profane to begin with. But it Mr..
Carlyle had been wise enough to keep
his books and papers in remote studio,
and walk thither every morning, he and
his wife would have given less handle to
the gossip and the biographer.
Young ladies' about to marry literary
men, young men engaged to literary la
dies, should ponder on these things and
arrange to do their work away from
home, unless they have much better tenn
pers and digestions than the Carlyles en-
joyed. "Homes industries" may be sal
utary when they are mechanical, but
when they are mental, especially if the
laborer has the irritability of some
luckily not of all-geniuses.-Andrew
Lang.
The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1891-09-25
WHY THE DRUMMER QUIT,

You look blue"
81 feel blue"
-"Still travelling for Silk & Satn?"
'No; I've quit"
"Quit! You don't mean it! When did
you leave emp"
about 20 minutes ago"
what was the trouble? Expense ac.
COUNT
Eyes, expense account"
''Kicked on 80 for medicine when
you were suddenly taken i'll, SUPPOSE"
30, no; they passed that"
Didn't see how you could pay 81 a
day in a IS a day ho,ei, perhaps?"
mo; l charged it up at $3.50 and they
let it go at that"
OBJECTED TO paying 80 cents for a
shine, then?'
81 don't believe they ever saw that
item"
Thought dollar too big tip for a
sleepiug-cHr porter, imagine?'
NO; they've always allowed that"
what did they object to, them"
''Well, you see | sweled everything a
little TO sort OF make up for the night
was out with the boys, and they passed
every item unit. they came TO one of 81
for a sIeeping-car berth from st. Paul TO
Minneapolis. TntS was 900 much fOI
them. "-ChicdgO Tribune.
The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1891-09-25

Senators, Congressman, attorneys and
others have in this way offended him,
but he has not complained. His position
as Cabinet officer demands that he treat
them politely.
'The story of Mobiles dislike for to-
bacco accounts for something that hap
pened in the General Land Office during
the holidays of 1880, There was young
man in the Office who wished to be polite
to his chief, so he presented him with
box of fine cigars as Christmas present.
On the morning of the Goth of December
the clerk received note from the chief
clerk, returning the cigars, and a letter
of dismissal. The clerk was astonished
at such treatment, and took an appeal to
Secretary Noble, asking that he might
resign, and thereby not be disgraced by
dismissal. When the clerk appeared be-
fore the Secretary he informed that Off
cial that the only thing he had done was
to present Commissioner Graft with a
box of cigars as Christmas present.
"Then, sir, you have smoked yourself out
of office, came the answer from the Sec
rotary. Your case is hopeless, young
man; your example is bad one, and 1
cannot have you under this roof as an
employee
THE young man said the other day
that Noble had made one reform in the
tobacco line. He had not bought or
smoked cigar since, and said that he
had saved since that time on his tobacco
account up to the 3Oth of last June
$53. 25." Washington Post.
The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1891-09-25
DAUGHTERS OF THE REVOLUTION.

DAUGHTERS OF THE REVOLUTION.
Mrs. Benjamin Harrison sends out the
following circular:
WASHINGTON, Sept. 14th, 1891.
To the regents of the National Society
of Daughters of the American Revolu-
ton.
With view to the establishment of
complete unity of action and perfect
harmony of feeling throughout the Ma
tional Society of Daughters of the
American Revolution, the board of man
agement, conscious of the integrity of
its purpose and the legality of its actions,
requests meeting of every officer of the
society, and of every lady who had at
any time received an appointment
through any officer of the society,
whether she has received notice that
such appointment has been confirmed or
not. The meeting will be held Thurs
day, October 8, in the. drawing rooms of
1907 Massachusetts avenue, placed at
the disposal of the society on that date
as hall, and to be in no sense considered
private residence.
1t is earnestly requested that every
chapter formed, OF in process of forma-
ton, shall be represented on this 90
casion. 1t is requested that the ladies
coming TO this meeting shall bring a
clearly defined statement of any just
cause of complaint they may entertain
and documentary evidence to support
the position they are prepared to take.
The advisory board of the National So
ciety will be present and each chapter
regularly formed is invited, if it so de-
sires, to send one member of its advisory
board or council of gentlemen to aid its
lady representatives in maintaining its
views.
The fullest opportunity will be allowed
for the discussion of every question, and
it is believed that in the course of this
candid and friendly conference a full
understanding of mutual relations will
be attained and confidence established
In the Society of Daughters of the
American Revolution, which has for it's
high aim the patriotism of our native
land. Plans will be proposed for the adj
vancement OF the society. Practical
lines of work Will be considered and each
regent is invited to present her views
and those of her subjects.
1t must be understood that this meet
ing is for the conference only, and does
not take the place of the Continental
congress, which meets February 22d,
1892.
Carolina Scott Harrison, president
general; NJ. V. E. Cabell, vice president
general, presiding; Mary L. Shields, re-
Cording secretary-general; Ellen Harden
Wslworth, corresponding secretary
general.
The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1891-09-25
HOW A BOSTON MAN LOST ONE GIRL
AND MARRIED HER SISTER.

Miss Mollie Graham, formerly head
thinner in the millinery department of
Donalson's glass block, but now engaged
in similar capacity with a millinery
house in st. Paul, was to have figured as
bride recently in wedding which never
occurred The young lady not long ago
formed the acquaintance of Charles
Davis, young mercantile dealer of Bos-
ton. The young people began a cori e.
srondence, which promised to have a
happy sequel. Such would have been
the case but for the young lady's tickle
ness.
The wedding was to have occurred
some weeks ago at Springfield, ILL.,, the
former home of Miss Graham and the
present home Of her parents. The mar
riage pi eliminates were completed and
the happy young folks were to meet at
Miss Graham's parents home in Spring
field. A day or so before the time fixed
for the wedding, however, Miss Graham,
for some reason best known to herself,
telPgtapbed to Mr.. Davis that he need
not 60 on to Springfield. This bit of I'M
welcome instruction did not, neverthe-
less, keep Mr.. Davis from going toSpring-
field. He evidently thought there was
some mistake about it. If the wedding
did not occur he did not want to be re-
spOnsible for the awkward affair. So he
called upon his lady's parents in Spring
field oud had quite pleasant visit.
Mss Graham had several bright and
Attractive sisters. One of these, Miss
Jennie, took quite f. ncy to Mr.. Davis.
She came to Minneapolis and visited
with her older STE for time. Now it
is announced that after the exchange of
several tender billet dOuc Mr.. Davis and
Miss Jennie Graham a,e to be wedded.-
ST. Paul Pioneer Press.
The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1891-09-25

-"Oh, mamma" exclaimed little
Johnnie, "the trees in your yard are get
ting bald-headed."
The hunting season will soon be
here, when the country steer will need a
hide about foot thick.
Soda water should be quite favor
lite drink with the lmpecunious. They
can always get it charged.
Dentists seldom go into politics,
which is all the more remarkable when
we remember the pull they have.
The man who owns railroad never
gets half so much joy out of it as the
man who travels on free pass.
-Totling-"Why do people borrow
trouble so muchP' Dimling-"Because
it isn't necessary to put up any collat-
eral."
Mr.. Newly Rich-"My income is so
large 1 can't spend it." Mr. Ed Itor-
why don't you start newspaper"
If, as the dress reformers say, "cor-
sets have filled more graves than whisky
ever did," it is presumably because they
have been tight.
-Caller-''Is Miss Brownston at
homep" Servant-'Yes'm She'll be
at home all the evenin'. It's my night
out"
-Edwin-"And you'll always be true
to me, Angelina?" Angelina-"Why do
you doubt me, Edwin?" Edwin-"Oh,
you're too good to be true
-Pudley-"By jove! What tall fell
low Jones is" Dudley-''Don't see it,
old man. He's always short when l
meet him."
-"Music alleviates the sorrows of the
soul" but to alleviate and cure the ills
of the body, such as Influenza and ca
tarrh, we must have recourse to Old
Sauls Catarrh Cure. Price only 25 cts. a
bottle.
''Self preservation is the first law of
nature" Use Old Saul's Pile Ointment,
and cure your piles.
You have forgotten something,
SIR" said the waiter, as the diner was
leaving. keep it for your honesty"
replied the generous man.
-Jagson says Nature did mean
thing when she gave the giraffe such a
long throat, and refused to make Ken
lucky his native state.
The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1891-09-25
Merit Wins.

We desire to say to our citizens, that
for years we have been using DR.. King
New Discovery for Consumption, DR..
Kings New Life Pills, Bucklen's Arnica
Salve and Electric Bitters, and have
never handled remedies that sell as WELL
or that have given such universal salts
faction. We do not hesitate to guaran-
tee them every time, and we stand ready
to refund the purchase price, if satisfac-
tory results do not follow their use.
These remedies have won their great
popularity purely on their merits. G. D..
Gibson, druggist.
The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1891-09-25
ONE THING GEORGE DIDN'T KNOW

They were walking on hillside over
looking Lake Champlain.
George, DEAR" she said, chow charm
ing it is TO get away from the heated
city and its artificial life and spend few
weeks among these simple rustics.
What are those little green things grow
ing on those trees? They look like
gooseberries.
''Those are apples, Mabel"
George, how absurd you are ! APP.
pies? Those little things! I'm going to
ask this wee country girl and see."
Nonsense, Mabel, don't display your
ignorance. Don't you think l know
Those are apples in their first stage, far
from ripe yet, small and green. Goose
berries don't grow on trees. anyway;
they grow on bushes"
Dear George, how clever you are to
know all those things. Where did you
learn it all? How heavily the trees are
loaded All but one. Look at that one,
George. 1t has no apples at all on it
What is the reason of that, dear?'
'Well, really, Mabel, 1 know a good
deal about things in general, but it's a
little difficult to say just why that tree
has no apples. 1 presume the farmer
has picked them ALL"
But, George, how could the apples
on one tree ripen so far ahead of the
other?'
Perhaps he likes them green"
Then why not pick some of the
other trees ?'
"What little tease it is" said he
perhaps the wind shook them off; per
haps caterpillars destroyed the buds
perhaps dozen things, dear. Agricul
ture is precarious pursuit. About as
safe as poker, should say"
The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1891-09-25
AN ANTI-ToBACCONIsT.

81 notice by the Post that Secretary
Noble dislikes the scent of tobacco
smoke as much as ever, and can tell
you the cause of it," said an old Ohioan
last night. sit dates back to his boy
hood days, when his father and Capt.
John Duble, one of the best known river
men who ever walked the deck of a
Western steamer, Kept the old Dennison
Hotel in Cincinnati.
John w. Noble was small boy, bright
and ambitious, thon a. now; wanted to
run things after his own way of think
ing. He Was known around the hotel as
little Jack, the cake boy. He got that
name from the fact that he was the boy
who brought tho hot Juck-wheat and
corn cakes from the kitchen Ito the
dining-room for the guests. The Denni-
son was noted in those days for its hot
cakes.
There are I few Of US left who have
not pulled in our gang planks and
headed for the other shore. remember
little Jack, the cake runner, and the
good times we had in the winter around
the blazing fire in the large sitting and
reading room Of The hotel, smoking our
clay pipes filed with choice Ohio and
Kentucky tobacco, You can imagine
what fog twon.y OF thirty clay pipes,
well charged with strong tobacco, would
make in close room. Young Jack Noble
had to look after this guest room and
see that the servants kept it clean and
tidy and properly wait OH the guests. 1t
was very responsible duty for small
boy, but he did his duty like man, but
the tobacco smoke made him sick, and
from that day to this he has been an
open enemy of the weed.
There are many anecdotes told of
John and his trouble with tobacco.
When he was at school large boy one
day, knowing his aversion for tobacco
smoke, lighted pipe and walked by
John when he was deeply absorbed in
his lessons and pulled the smoke in his
face. Young Noble sprang at the fellow
and before he could be pulled off, whip
ped him thoroughly. L will strike any
boy or man who puffs tobacco smoke in
my face said John, as he picked up his
book and resumed his studies.
During his service in the army on one
occasion, early in the morning, he was
passing around the camp of his regi-
ment and found soldier in front of the
commissary tent smoking cigar. The
colonel received Whit of the blue curl
of smoke as he passed. He halted and
asked the soldier to advance. 4 have
one request to make of you,' said Colo
mel Noble, and that is never again
smoke your cigar about the camp when
am likely to be around
1.-The trouble about that is, Colonel
replied the soldier, you are very uncer-
tain in your rounds; you always turn up
when we are not looking for you. l did
not expect you about SO early, but will
pass the word along the line never to
smoke when the Colonel is expected
around
''Since he has been Secretary of the In
terror, Mr.. Noble has been worried al
most into madness at times because peo-
pie, not knowing his popularity about
smoking, have smoked in his presence.
The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1891-09-25
A Good-Looking Face.

We like to see. Yet Erysipelas distig-
ures the features and the disease is as
dangerous as it is repulsive. 1t is some
times called ''St. Anthony's Fire." and
often ends in sudden death. S. B. Car
penter, Granville N. Y, had it in both
legs, and was cured by DR.. David Ken
nedy's Favorite Remedy of Rondout, N.
Y. This medicine excels all others for
blood.
The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1891-09-25
HIS COFFIN READY FOR 40 YEARS.

DR.. James Ramsay Speer, distin-
guished physician, who died few days
ago at Pittsburgh, at the age of SO years,
was a relative of Presidents Buchanan
and Harrison. He was, forty years ago,
one of the leading managers of the Allie
gheny Cemetery, and at that time was
most active in promoting the beauty of
the grounds, while acting in the capacity
of secretary and treasurer. In opening
new driveway it was found necessary
to remove large walnut tree. DR.. Speer
ordered the tree to be cut down. He
told John McMasters, now deceased, the
carpenter employed by the corporation,
that he could have the tree to sell or use
as he pleased. McMasters, who was a
great admirer of Dr. Speer, kept his pur-
a secret and made two elegantly carved
collins from the trunk of the tree. He
expended number of months on
the work, and when he com
pleted the two Baskets they were real
works of art. He concealed both baskets
in the attic Of the house of the superin-
tendent of the cemetery, where they re-
NAMED undiscovered for nearly twenty
years. Upon the death OF Mrs. Elizabeth
Speer, the wife of Dr. Speer, McMasters
took one of the Baskets from its hiding
place and presented it to the family, and
Mrs. Speer was buried it at his special
request. Then he told the superintend-
ent of the cemetery that the other coffin
was indended for the burial of DR.. Speer,
but urged that the matter be preserved a
secret even from DR.. Speer himself, and
his request was complied with.
The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1891-09-25
MY FAMILY DOCTOR

For the last two years has been Sulphur
Bitters, and until began using them in
my family, we had more or less sick
ness, and our doctors bill has been very
large. Since we began their use we have
had no doctor to pay, and three dollars
invested in sulphur Bi,Cers has kept
health in our family.-E. Knott, Post
master, Waverly, Iowa.
The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1891-09-25

snow, George, dear, just let me see if
this little girl knows"
Little girl, can you tell me why this
tree has not single apple on it, while
the others are fairly loaded P''
"Cauth 18th not an apple tree,
am"
And it was't.-Nep York Tribune.
The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1891-09-25
Overheard on the street-"We

Overheard on the Street-"We sum-
mered at Newport and We'll fall at At
lantic, but I haven't thought yet where
we will spring"
"A colored philosopher is reported to
have said: Life, my breddern, am mos
ly made up of prayin' for rain and then
wishin' it would cl'ar off,"
The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1891-09-25

When Baby was sick, we gave her Castoria
When she was Child, she cried for Castoria
When she became Miss, she chung to CastoriA
When she had Children, she gave them Castoria
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1891-07-07
Make Money.
BETTER THAN 8 PEP CENT.
The Atlantic-Pac ific Rail.
way Tunnel Company

Incorporated in 1854 to buy land, mines,
mill sites, water powers. machinery,
etc. in Colorado, to pay for the same in
shares or money; to open mines and
carry on the business Of mining and
treating of ores to open a tunnel and
operate the same for mining as we'll as
general railway purposes later on.
Under and in strict conformity with
it's charter it has authorized the issuance
of 700 900 SHARES OF THE FAR VALUE OF
$40 each. It has disposed of about $780,
600 of its shares for valuable properties
in the counties of Clear Creek and Sum
init, Colorado, and for such cash as has
thus far been used to develop and in
prove its properties.
Its shares are full paid and no taxes
or assessments can be laid against them,
and, therefore, no act of the Company
can deprive one person of his share or
shares for the benefit of others.
Two hundred thousand shares still IN
its treasury for sale as the Company
offers them for improvement purposes.
MORE THAN 1900 men, women and
children now jointly interested as share
owners, and, therefore, members OF the
Atlantic Pacific Railway Tunnel Co.
wThe Company has more than
four millions OF dollars worth OF
property ali FULLY paid for.
wAu Its Interest obligations are
met promptly as they mature.
More than 5000 feet of tunnel already
driven. including 800 feet on the east
side of the Rocky Mountains, 60 miles
due west from Denver, Colo, and more
than 400 feet of tunnel driven into the
west side of the mountains, as well IS
side tunnels into veins.
Main tunnel, when completed for RAJ
way use, will be rs, 200 feet long.
More than So 900, 900 worth of gold,
silver, copper and lead owned by this
Company, already In sight, to be mar
keted in the future.
Work going on in the tnnnel and IN
the mines day and night.
More than $50 rich, large veins OF mi
neral, gold, silver, copper and lead are
being cut by this tunnel, at depths rang
ing from 1000 to 400 feet below their
surface, so that millions of dollars worth
of the precious metals can be brought
out each year and sold, the profits all
going to share owners in exact proper
ton to the number of shares each per
son owns.
Full paid, worcestershire, non-taxablc
shares in the above-named Company,
making the purchaser MEMBER OF
THE COMPANY and JOINT OWN
Err in all the rights, properties, fran
chises and Pre- fits from sale Of ore, lani
and mineral. and from all rentals as
they accrue. These shares are of the
PAR VALUE OF $40 EACH. Present selling
price, So each, but no fewer than TWO
SHARES will be sold at time. No per-
sonai liability to share owners, and no
running in debt by the COMPANY.
On money thus Invested, the investor