The Opelousas courier., 1891-01-24
HUMOR OF THE DAT.

Ills AHeef SeSo0'
Enough may be as good as SfeastEbus
a feast is good enough'for mostFof@'s@
Yenowine's Meps.
Why doesn't ansEnglish, syndicatssbuy
Canada's debt2 There's millions inaes-
Pittsburg Telegraph.
Ladies, W POWDER dimpled cheek.
It can do execution well enough without
being loaded.-Puek.
Unless a man is agreeable to allSthe
women he meets they go around plying
his wife.-Atcbison Globe.
U-sWhat makes Smith SO .straighht2"
I-aI don't know, unless It is his circum-
stances ."-Ieras Sitftings.
Austin has a very precise business man
who never pays a visit acknowledgements
ing a receipt for it.-Tsras 6ysftangs.
Marriage is not o lottery; u is q gafae.
One man gets the prize, while.th Others
oct the hake.-Indi0napoas Journal.
Book Agent-Ihave just the kkinndHsof
work you want" Chappiee-tBltsmny
deah fellow, I don't wantework' ofsany
kind. "-Indianapolis Journal.
First Girl (proudly)-"our baby can
saw pa and ma" Second GitlzztsDat's
muffin. My cousin, wot's rich. us got
er wax one wot kin do dat."-LDs.
OF all the queer men Of the times
And unto cranks the nearest
The man who asks you questions Is
Tndoubfedly the uaBrist.
Mrs. Dobbins (readingl-aCountess
Maria Won Kensky, Of Bohemia, has
bagged 1873 .hares in, one day" Ropblns
-GHer husband. win soon be baldheaded
at that rate. "-Epoch.
"Kitty," said the lover, as they satin
the dark r of the piazza-'hatsys
close your eyes" "Why SO, .Georgew
ssIf you don't everybody will be able to
see US. "-Harper's Basar.
An exchange says there are 100000
women married annually in London.
The average Seattle woman thinks her
self lucky if she is married four times In
a lifetime.-8eattb Press.
.sDream on, dream on, 7 the singer cried,
And reused him from his trance
"Oh. how 1 wish that you he sighed,
HWould give me hal, a chance"
-Washingt6n Posi-.
A Canadian doctor has just been testi-
fying that a murdered mans heart
stopped "right in the middle of a beat"
That's nothing; policemen often do the
same. thing.-Utica Herald.
she-sThere goes poor Miss Price with
her fanee. Why, the man is old enough
to be her father and ugly enough to be
her brotherm He-"Oh. but he is rich
enough to be her husband. "-L0.
Agtudent who acted as a waiter at a
White Mountain hotel the past summer is
about to marry the daughter of q family
at whose table he served. All things
come to him who waits.-BostoD Post.
Silver and gold bands for the hair are
very popular among fashionable ladies,
but the brass band makes more noise M
the world-especially if it contains a bass
drum and a bassoon.-Jgelers' Circular.
He's surely a difficult person to kill,
His frame seems Of adamant;
He's dying each day, but remains with US
The coolest inhabitant."
Boston Courier.
Miss Passee examining the medal Of a
recent eraduate)--"Iha have a medal, too"
Young ~Friend-"You have2 Why on
earth don't you wear ita" Miss Passes
with a sigh1-sI would, but I can't get
the date off Of il. "-H@psr's Bazaar.
He-sshall we marry in October or
Aprila" She (carelessly>-"Really, I
don'tsknow. Let's toss up and see." He
feeling in his pockets)-sBy Jove, I
haven't a penny" She Grigidlyl-"Aha
1t isn't necessary to toss. "--New 1or6
World.
smithers (who had just prcposed)-
"Why do you smilea Is my proposition
so utterly ridiculous that" Lizette
-aNot at all, Mr.. smithers. U am only
looking pleased. / bet Mr.. Hicks a box
of candy I'd have therefusal of you with
in a week.n-New York Sun.
A Young man had been talking to a
bored editor for quite a quarter of an
hour, and at last observed: ssThere are
some things in this world chat go without
saving" Eyes" said the editor, tsand
there are still more persons in the world
who saw a good deal without going."-
LOndoa Gkbe.
Miss Terriut--ssWhen mornmer and !
were in Yurrup, oh, the awfulest thing
happenedI There was a prince-and a
count-and-and they fought a duel
about poor me-with pistols" Yabsley
-aAhl were they 1oaded?' Miss Ter
riut-aNo, they weren'tl They were
just as sober as could be. "-Lndionapolis
Journal.
Miss Flora (forty-five and homely)--
.soh, Mr.. Blunt, I had such q strange
dream last night" Mr.. Bluut-'fWhat
was it, Miss Floral" Miss Flora-"l
dreamed that we were married and on
our wedding tour. Did You ever have
such a dream2" Mr.. Blunt (energetically)
-stNo, indeed. I never had the night
1se. ~ HTn~ra 0sA&nGo