The Louisiana Democrat., 1891-10-28

thorough book keeper. - Baltimore
American.
-Women's sweet disposition is al.
ways shown by her husbands long
hair.-Texas Siftings
The counterfeiter is satisfied If he
can spend money as fast as he can make
tt.-Yonkers Statesman.
-He-I always have you in my
mind" She-"I don't object. There
is no danger of my getting beyond my
depth"
The thermometer is thing OF
which everybody has low estimate
when it takes high stand Boston
Transcript.
With some people it is not their
own troubles SO much as the happiness
of their neighbors that disturbs them.
Rams Horn.
"A turtle is very slow until he is
made up into soup. Then we've no.
ticed he goes pretty fast.-Yonkers
Statesman.
-Tommy-What part of speech is
"woman?" "Woman' is no part
Of speech at all, my son. She is the
whole of it. Judy.
-Clara-"Mr. Bristle, the artist,
wants me to stand for him as model
Maude--"What! Is he studying geom.
etry?'-Cloal1 Review.
The young man who says "Thank
you!" when the girl he loves has prom
iscd to be his wife ought never to say it
in words.-Somerviile journal.
There is in Florida what the Starke
Telegraph calls "a natural born news
paper man." 1t does not say whether
he was born daily or week 'y.-Texas
Siftings.
Not n.-Collector-"Is Mr.. Dett
in?' Servant-"No, sir, he is out"
Collector-''When will he be IMP" Ser.
want (artlessly)-''As soon as you go
away. y."-Yankce Blade.
-He-"You have q beautiful co]lcc-
ton of pressed flowers" Shc-"Yes,
butI lack one variety" Hc-"What is
that, pray? Perhaps I can secure it for
YOU" Shc-"Orange blossoms
81 feel like queen-and you all
are my pages" said the popular girl to
the group of dudes surrounding her.
Nearly enough to make a blank book, {"
remarked her envious rival.-Harper's
Bazaar.
AS They Say 1t in Boston. Miss
Wabash This is ''measly'' hotel,
isn't it?'' Miss Hubb-'.Itdoesp partale
of the cha, ncteristics Of q malady COM
mon in early childhood" Brooklyn
Eagle.
That the ears of humanity are grow.
ing larger and their jaws growing less
is but another illustration of the sur
vival of the fttest. The man who keeps
his ears open and his mouth shut is
coming to the ont.-Indianapolis Jour-
nal.
"A Last Resort.-"Do think she
would marry you? Well, no, l think
not" Jaclz-''You must be jesting." !"
Tom--"No, am in earnest, You see
she is only in her second season now.
There is still hope for her" Yankee
Blade.
Next to the one who will let you
talk all the time about yourself, the
most pleasing companion in this world
is the one who will occupy all this time
in telling you Of good things that other
people have said about you.-Someryile
Journal.
Rose said her mother, you'll
have to make that Mr.. Golosh go home
earlier Its not my fault, mamma. :"
Not your fault? Didn't hear you last
night at the front door say, stop, Ed.
ward, half Z dozen times? If he want
ed to go, why did You want to stop
him?"-Philadelphia Times.
He Needed cst.-Lorg-haired In
dividual Ito managing editor)-''Is the
literary editor mp Managing Editor
NO, he's gone off on his vacation" {"
L. II. I.-"Do you know whether he
read my poem before he wcnt?' Man.
aging Editor-"I think he did. He asked
for an extra weeks rest Buffalo Elk.