The critic. (Washington, D.C.) 1890-1891, 1891-03-16
OVER THE NUTS AND WINE.

II is always iy time with abscondcrs. -PiuS
burg Chronicle.
A cooks experience covers considerable
. range IonkerS Statesman.
When the average woman hasn't anything
else to do, she always feels as II she would like
to 90 ont and buy somethng.--S0Disryiite
Jcuindi.
"Ycs, hut how do you know that Bluflsins Is
u married many
y "Oh, am surc OF 1t. just see how happy he
is when away from home. ."-BoStoa Transcript.
-, What allied you last night' Were yon
'slIad an awful nightmare. Dreamed opened
jackpot with four aces pat and no ono came
-in.i-Ne'o York Recorder.
The oflicc-seekcr in Washington hopes for
an early spring opening.-7er SJtings.
his wife docs not understand him, and his wife
says II Is because his mother always spoiled
Naturalization Gio6e.
In token that America appreciates the
promptncss OF Franccin In being first to respond
TO the invitation for 1893, the menu cards at all
the great hotels will be printed that year,
French CHICAGO Tribune.
He chapley seems to me to be man of one
idea.
:. siie--Ile is more fortunate than thought
LIFE.
Baglcy--Don't you think the killing OF An
anias and sapphira for lying was pretty Sc
Bracc-w sos
Bagley..,It was about real estate deal, you
know.-.umseY'S Weekly.
The Emperor OF China TO Minister Blair)-
Welcome, Confucius OF the Western World
n MI III mi Qyta boa on md
played in 9D7 acts and SO tablcaux.-Puck.
Wife, wish you'd tell the nurse to wash
baby's face and hands and put on his clean
clothes
Ilusband--Why, my dear, are you going to
take the baby out this kind OF weather?
mo, darling, thought I'd let him play with
Mr.. Farwcst (at Florida Hotel)-Thc lady
you were talking to appcars to be person OF
Mrs. Farwest-sho is. She knows everybody
"Whs1e does she lives"
| '1n New York, presume. heard her say
| che spent six months OF every year In Florida
and the other six in Mainc."-Nev Yorh
| Weekly.
Baglcy--Did you ever have horror Of being
| buried alivcf
Brace-Ycs; but it all left me after had
lived little while in Philadelphia Brooklyn
| Flodgely-As II q all over with US, j wish
you would return me the ring and watch
Alice-I cannot give them to you until after
| Lent.
| Fledsely- But Insist upon them now;
/ Alice-You know, Mr.. Fiedgely, that l can
--JelesleyS Weekly ''77D'
De Duds.Aw, nah good man, do you make
trousahs wide or narrow nowY
| Fashionable Cuttcr-All depends hon tn
Nes1 York Wsekiys
a Texas miser keeps everything under loci
| SUtin0s.
! Well.dressed Stranger Madam, in the upper
hand pocket OF yest that you gave TO miser
belonging 10 yonr husband. ] have
Lady OF the iIouse-.Why, is this the SAME
manf What q great chaDgei
| Stranger-Yes, q rich uncle died suddenly ant
| left me all his wealth. As ] was about to say,
| have to thank your husband
Lady OF the Honso--Why, what fory
stranger-for the cigar. | gave II TO nj,
uncle. York Clothier and Fnnisher.
Brown.-Well, ] must say skinner Is th,
| luckiesf mortal ever knew. You know hei
been the boss promoter OF the slumgnllion IN
vestmcnt Company OF Alatexasf Well, sir, tn,
concern went all to pieces yesterday, and tn
stock, which has been selling atpar, isn't wortl
the paper it's written ON No, sir; and IL you'll
believe It, skinner sold out his last share tn
day before the collapsed II that isn't luck, IL
like to know what You call I'll
Fogg-Ycs, that's luck; the kind of luck tina
fills our prisons Boston Transcript.
Inf f1I,