The morning call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1878-1895, 1891-02-01
THE RIDING-SCHOOL.
How an English Master IlSfucE Els Glass Of
Ladies and Gentlemen.

much cHcciiuIueSS 10 the Interior, WHICH Is
pare ana bleak, and pervaded by blush haze.
Members OF the class discovered standing
about on the tan, waiting for their horses to be
brought In. At the further end Is an aIcoye,
with small balcony, in which Mrs BIlDow-
Kay, the mother of one the equestrians, Is
seated with young female friend.
Mrs. Bilbow-Kay-Oh, Robert used to
ride very nicely indeed when he was boy,
but he has been out OF practice lately, and
so, as the doctor ordered him horse-exercise.
/ thought it would be wiser for him to take
few lessons. Such an excellent change for
any one with sedentary pursuitsi
The Friend-But isn't riding a sedentary
pursuit, too.
Mrs. B.-K.-Robert says he doesn't find
it so.
Enter the Riding Mastery
Riding Master (saluting with cane)-Ev-
enin'. gentlemen-your 'orses will be in di-
rectly; 'ope we shall see some ridin' this
time. (Clatter without; enter Stableman
with horses.) Let me see-Mr. Bilbow- Kay,
sir, you'd better ride the Shar; lie amt
been out all day, so he'll want some and
ling. CMr. Blk, with sickly smile. ac-
cepts tall and lively horse.) No, Mr.. Tongs.
that amt your 'orse to-day; you've got past
i'm. sir. We'll put you up on Lady Loo;
she's bit rough till you get on terms. with
bit. Yes, Mr.. Joggles, sir, You take Kan
CARGO, please. Mr.. Bumpas, I've lad the
Artful Dodger out fer you; and mind he
don't get rid of you so easy as he did Mr..
Grpper last time. Got nice 'orSe for you,
Mr.. AIRY Singers, sir-Frar DiavolO. You
mustn't take no notice of his bucking Bit
at starting-holl saon leave it off
Mr.. Singers (who conceals his qualms
under forced facetiousness)-SoUn leave
me off, you mean!
r. ii. (pfter distributing the remaining
horses)-Now then-bring your 'orses up in
to line, and stand by, ready to mount at the
word of command. reins taken up in the
left ana with the second and little fingers,
the first Mount! That 'orse amt bicycle,
Mr.. Singers. (Mr. s., in an undertone.
No; worse luckD Number off! Walk! L
shall give the word to trot directly.
seats - that back a bit straighter, Mr..
Copper. No. 4 just fall out, and
We'll let them stirrup-leathers down an
other 'ole or two for yer. (No 4, who has
just been CONTEMPLATING himself that
has to see them let down to
distance where he can touch them
by stretching) Now you're comfort
able. con, are we?" from Mr.. S. Troll
Mr.. Tongs, sir, 'old that 'orse in-he's get
tin away with you already. Very bad, Mr..
JOggles, sir-keep those 'eels DOWN. Lost
your Stirrup, MIR. Jellyi Never mind that
feel for it, sir. | want you to be independ-
ent of the irons. I'm going to make you
ride without EN- presently. (Mr. Jelly shivers
in his saddle.) Captin' Chopper. sir; if that
volunteer ridgment as you're goin' TO be the
Major of sees you like you are now on a
field day. they'll ave to fall out to larf, sir
(Alr. Chopper devoutly wishes he had been
less ingenious as to his motive for prac-
ticing his ridng) Now, Mr.. Singers, make
that brute feel 'oos the master! (Mr. S.
''He knows, the brutep)
Mrs. B.-K.--Hes very rude to alls the
class, except dear Robert-but then Robert
has such nice easy seat.
The r. M.-Mr. Bilbow-Kay, sir, try and
set bit closer. Why, you amt no move
'old on that saddle than a stamp with tho
gum licked off Can-ter! You're all right
your saddle, sir! didn't say onthe
ground!
Mrs. Blk (anxiously to her son, as he
paSsesl-Bob, are you quite sure you're safe?
CIo fTiend)-His horse is snortIng SO dread
fully.
R. M.-'Alt! Every gentleman take his
feet out of the stirrupS, and cross them on
the saddle in front OF him. Not your feet.
Mr.: Singers. we amt Turks 'erel
Mr.. 5. soto yocel-There'S one bloomin'
Turk ere, anyway!
R. M.-Now, then, walk! Troll Set
hack, gentlemen, set back all,Old on by
your knees, not the pommels. l see you,
Mr. Jelly, kitchin' odd O. the mane-I shall
come. Quicken up bit-this is ride not
funeral. Why / could roll faster than
you're trottng! Lor', you're like row o.
Guy Foxes 43 on 'orse6ack, yoI arel An, I
thought I'd see one O you orfl Goa-ron. all
O. you; you don't come ere to play at ridin'
-Pll make you ride afore I've done with
you! 'Ullo, Mr.. Joggles. nearly gone that
time, sir, There, thatll door we'll ave all
your saddles to let unfinished. Wa-alkl
MI. Bllbow-kay, when your 'Orse changes
his pace sudden, it don't look well for
you to be found settin 'arf-way up
his neck, and it gives 'im bad
opinion OF yer. sir. Uncr0ss sterrups. Trot
on! 1t amt no mortal use your clucking to
that mare, Mr.. longs, sir, because she don't
understand the langwidge-touch her with
your EEL in the ribs. Mr.. Singers, that
'orse is dom Jest what he likes with you. 1t
i'm, sir; he's no friends and few relationsI
Mr.. S. with spirit)-I amt goint to lit i'm.
sefp'
R. M.-When 1 say "Circle Right"-odd
numbers ii wheel round and fall in behind
even ones. Circle Right l..... Well, If ever
i didn't tell you 10 fail off he'lDd. Ketch
your 'orSes and stick to 'em next time.
Right incline! o. course, Mr.. Joggles, if
you prefer takin' the animal for little ride
all by himself Wen let you out in the streets
otherwise p'raps you'll kindly follow yer
leader. Captin Cropper, sir, if you let that
curb out bit more, Reindeer wouldn't be
'arf SO nasty with yer. All, now you ave
done it. You want your reigns painted diff
ferent eolorS and labeled, sir, you do. AIT.
the rest of you. Now, seem you're shook
down in your saddles a bit-("Shook
ups more like itp' from Mr.. S.)-we'n
ave the 'urdles in and shew you a
bit O. Donnybrook! (The class endeavors
to assume an air of delighted anticipation
at this pleasing prospect) Go Assistant
r. NJ, who has entered and said something
in an undertone) Ell, Captain 'Edstall
here, and wants to try the gray cob over
'urdles? Ask him if he'll come in now
we re Just going to do some jumping
Assist X. Minis don't look much like
going over 'urdies-'cept in front o. the 'orSe
but I'll tell the Captain.
The hurdles are brought in and pre- pped
up. Enter well turned-out Stranger, on q
gray cob.
MIR. Singers Ito him)-You amt lost moth
ing by coming late, can tell yer. We've
bin having gay. old time in Grenade US
ride without sterruDS he did!
Captain Hedstall-Haw, really? Didn't
get grassed did you?
MIR. Swell, me and my 'orse separated
by mutual consent. l amt whot you call a
fancy 'orseman. We've got to 90 at that
ldeer. Ell? It's no good funking tits got
to be dunei
R. M.-Now, Captin-not you, Captin
Cropper-Captin 'EdStall, mean, will you
show them the way over, please?
Captain II. rides at il; the cob jumps
too short and knocks the hurdle down
to his riders intense diSgust)
MIR. 81 say Guv'nor, that was near
thing. l wonder you weren't off?
Captain .-I-ah--don't often come off.
MIR. S.-You won't say that when you've
been ere few times. You see, they've put
you on quiet animal this journey. l shall
try to get him myself next time. He be ayes
like gentleman. he does.
Captain H.--1ou wont mount him. if
you take my adyice-he has rather a deli
cate mouth.
Mr.. Sob, don't mind that-I should
ride him on The curb. O. course.
CIhe class rides ut the hurdle. one by oae)
X. M.-Now. Mr. Singers, give i'm more
OF is ed than that, sir-or he'll take it.
Qh, Lor, well, It's soft falling luckily Mr..
Jogglrs, sir, keep him back till you're in
line with it,. Better sir. you come down