The Lamar register., 1891-09-12
THOMPSON OF OURS.
THE CONFIDENTIAL REPORT.


dahar it gets very cold in January
nasty, biting, clustering cold that nips
the liver and shortens the temper;
that comes whistling your mud
hut with a northeast wind from off
the SHOWS, and cracks the shrivelled
skin OFF you like old parchment.
The Colonel blew on his fingers,
howled for fresh wood to be piled up
on the fire, and fell to the contempla-
ton of his thumb, which was FROST
bitten.
Before him upon the table lay the
loathsome sheets of foolscap known
as the annual Confidential Reports.
Someof thesewere alreadyfilled in, some
blank as yet. Each was headed by
the name OF an officer, and fringed by
the impertinent personal riddles set
yearly for commandants to answer.
Now, even when forced to look from
the point of view OF disapproval upon
any one of his Boys" this honorable,
kindly English gentleman held the
system OF confidential disparagement
in horror. But really this morning,
what with the cold and the maggots
in the rice which had put him off his
breakfast, and the extraordinary de-
lay in the mail letters, he felt inclined
20 damn every man-iack OF them, him
self included. With a roaring blizzard
searching your bones, and suspicion
0f faVar. N ynrr. blood pD+hip,
decent to eat, you don't feel like certi-
lying that every soul under your com
mand is remarkable for all qualities
that go to make saints upon earth.
Anyhow, the Colonel did not feel
like it. He began turning over the
sheets with that sickly, languid feel
ing OF revolt with which monotony in
its unpleasant forms is apt to inspire
one after long years OF patient grind.
He hated these grim skeleton sketch
es in black and white. 1t was always
the same thing-the same weary
struggle to combine strict truth with
fair words; to put "Yes' where it
ought to be NO" and NO" where it
ought to be Yes" For were they
indeed-all these youths-zealous in
well-doing, all talented, all factful, all
OF equable temper? Had they every
one OF them been endowed from their
cradles with unnatural sagacity and
aptitude for command? Were they;
in short, ready-made generals from
the moment they entered the service?
Alas, no! The Colonel's eye wandered
to his crippled thumb again and then
back to the sheets under his other
hand, and presently fell upon
certain name heading one OF them
Whereupon he cursed the authorities
in his heart for pack OF fools and
sighed. 1t was Thompson-Lieuten-
ant William Thompson-known by
the name OF ''Billy."
The Colonel took it in his hand and
sighed again. There was not one, or
hardly one, of those cut-and-dried
questions that could be answered
gracefully, yet conscientiously, as re-
garded this young man. ~ could
describe him in three words" groaned
the Colonel; "harum-scarum young
devil"
Then, for.he liked the lad, he began
to wonder how on earth he was to fill
up that Report. He was n keen SOL
der himself, and, If truth be told, had
partiality for the type SO pithily de-
scribed in those three words. He
would rather have such with him in
lllt lltlll llltIl EOIlt OIIltTS LOT NIOln
perchance more could be said on pa
per. OF such he knew was the king
dom OF heroes.
The ghosts of many haunting TRACE
dies came crowding into the old sol
dier's mind as he sat lingering that in
fernal paper. Did any OF these harsh
moral photographs OF them, with
'Yeses" and Noes" in the most un-
becoming places, lie rotting still per-
haps in the Adjutant-General's offices?
He got up shivering and kicked the
logs into a blaze, then returned with
stern determination to the study of
the vexlng questions in hand. What
could he say for Billy thompson The
lad had the temper of game bull-ter-
rier, the tact and Judgment OF a New
foundland puppy, and about as much
ability and requirement as the aver
age English schoolboy. The thought
OF Billy Thompson as ornamented
with the complete list of Confidential
Report virtues was nothing less than
grotesque.
He glanced down the list. Why, that
very morning he had spent. a bad half
hour in wigging the youngster for
shortcomings in almost every item.
Late again for parade. Violent with
a Sepoy. Hadn't the faintest notion
of his drill, and so on.
"What on earth am l to say for
you, sir?" he had asked, angrily, tap
ping the bundle OF uncompromising
papers, at which Billy glanced with
ruefui despair in his honest eyes. "You
are distinctly careless, wanting in tact,
useless at office work-what's the
use OF complaining of your writer's,
and argumentative
Ride? OF course; and that's about all
youre're fit for. That and tennis;
but unluckily these won't advance
you in your profession, nor gain your
respect nor fit you tor a command"
Then the Colonel had stolen look
at the frank, bright face, and thought
for the millionth time how ridiculous
it all was. The lad was honorable
and brave. Why not trust to time
and training to do the rest? He
wanted tight hand over him OF
course; but why be forced to send up
a nasty, disparaging report of him to
headquarters?