The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1891-10-29
To start new growth OF hair, Halls Hair Re-
newer is the best preparation.


To start a new growth OF hair, Haps Hair Re-
newer is the best preparation.
Forced to 1t.
Melton-I see that Manager has broken off his
engagement
Dobbs-What was the difficulty2
Melt0n-He found out that he couldn't get
married without getting a new dress suit
Clothier ana Furnisher
Prompt relief In sick hea dache, dizzi-
ness, nausea, constipation, pain in the SIDE guar
anteed to those using Carter's Little Liver Pills.
One dose. Small price. Small DOSE Small
pill.
A Slow Recovery.
Briggs-Where is Spunker?
Giggs-Gone abroad for his health.
Brggs-What was the matter?
Griggs-He undertook to lead Boston german
in sack coat.-Clothier and Furnisher.
Ayers Hair YIgor invlgorates the scalp; cures
dandruf and itching. An elegant dressing.
Unkind.
Mrs. Credo-You may smoke if you like, Mr..
Pundit.
Mr.. Pundit-Thauk you; but never smoke 1t
Mrs. Credo-I know. But | always thought
that you sm0ked.-Puck.
With Elys Cream Balm child can be treat
ed without pain and with perfect safety. 1t cures
catarrh, hay fever and colds in the head. 1t is
easily applied into the nostriIs and gives imme-
date relief. Price so cents.
The following incident occurred in Medford
school:
class 10 grammar was reclting and one of the
younger boys was asked to compare "sick" He
began. thoughtiully: 'Sick," paused while his
brain struggled with the problem, then finished,
triumphanlly, "sick, worse, dead."-Harper's
Bazaar.
MY catarrh was very bad. For thirty years
have been troubled with it-have tried num-
Der of remedies without relief A druggist ad-
vlsed Ey's Cream Balm 1 have used only one
bottle and can say / feel like new man.
make this voluntary statement that others may
know of the Balm.-J. w. Mathewson, (Lawyer),
Pawtucket, r. /.
Judge Bender. celebrated Texas jurist has
son of whom the judge is very proud He thinks
the boy has a judicial mind, and will grow up to
be great jurlst. The boy Is, however, very lazy.
A few days ago the Judge said
my dear boy, why don't you study more in
dustri0usly? want you TO become a famous
1urist. You have not touched your books
today"
am not going to study any today; am going
fishing" responded the indolent boy. al don't
see that it makes any difference, pa, whether
become famous jurlst a few days sooner or a few
days later."-Texas Stftings.
Are free from all crude and Irritating
matter. Concentrated medicine only Carter's
Little Liver Pills. Very small; very easy to
take; no pain; no gripping; no purging. Try
them.
Harry-That Montmorenc girl is nothing but a
heartless tirt. have been toJing her around all
summer, aud last evening at the party she &C.
tually turned her back on me.
Richard-ThaPs all right, my dear boy. Turn
about, you Know, Is fair pay.-Boston Tran
script.
No fictitious certificates but solid facts, testify
the marvellous cures by Ayers Sarsaparlla.
Mystery Cleared Up.
"How is 1t that your boss sweet wines cost so
much more than the sour ones?' asked gentle
man OF the liquor dealers boy.
"Do you suppose the boss gets his sugar for
nothing?" was the incautious reply.-Texas Slf T.
ings.