Fort Worth gazette. [volume] (Fort Worth, Tex.) 1891-1898, 1891-11-22

they wouldn't give her. whether she
was damaged any or not. The lawyers
they told Pa rs how they got forty thou
sand dollars for man that slipped up on a
streak of molasses and Sprained his heel,
cause the store where it happened be-
longed to i cinderkate without any sole, and
the jury put it to EN-. Pears to me like
Prof. Numbskull don't like me so well as he
used to, and he's quit philanderln' around
our house so much ever since one evenin'
when he up and asked my Pa how he lost
his leg. You see, poor Pa, he's awful
tuchuS and sensitive about that left leg of his
and nobody that knows him rite well ever
says anything TO him about II cause they
know il Sorter rifles MIN; so when the Prof.
looked sorter squint-eyed over to where my
Pa was readin' The GAZETTE and asked
him how he lost his leg, Pa looked up over
his paper and said if he wouldn't ask any
more questions he'd tell him. and the Prof.
he said he would never mention the subject
again. ''Well, then" says Pa sorter smlln'
and settlin' down to his readin' again, 1T
was bit OFF, II was so still in the room
you could have heard 4 gum drop, and al
ten OF my ants looked IL each other and
Ant Deuteronomy Pants, she's sOrter young
and giddy, she giggied out loud, and the
Prof he said he said he had an engage
ment and took his hat and left and he's
wonderin till yet, 1 reckon, what bit Pas
leg of.
All my ants, they liked to went wild
when they read III THE GAZETTE how the
girls up to Hardin college celebrated Hal
loween, and they all talked ii over with Pa,
cause my Pa he's good man and he
knows something about most anything you
never heard of, and Pa he told EN- as how
it wouldn't make any difference If it wasn't
the right mite, and they might try their for
tunes and perhaps get look at their future
husbands. though ia said they better throw
oils NJ
'em mad Teller to come they couldn't
all Get into one room. So we had big
time that mite and played more games. and
there was lots q grub and my chum come
over and brot about fourteen uonutS, ana
Ant Canda Samyna. she's an awful nog. she
eat six donuts aud four big pickles and
hunk Of cheese and swiiled down three
glasses of lemonaid and four cups of coffee,
and you never did see such cuttip' up IN
your born days, ana it was after II O'Clock
when we all went to bed; but none of 'em
never saw nothin' 'ceptin' my Ant Can da
Samyna, and she set up an orfull howl and
walked the whole place up, includln' my
cote that beloved like a kaT, and she says
she'd rather die than marry the man she
saw; she says that Teller on the front pa sc
of Ayres Ager Cure aimdnaX, with the
snaiX and goteS and fishes and crabs and
such like all around him and nothin' on him
to speak of, amt Il circumstance Pa, ne
mite have eaten somethin', and said 1t mite
have come from putin a No. supper in
No. 2 stumack, and he gave her bottle OF
Perry Davisis Pane Killer ana she was all
rite the next mOrnin'. but dldn want much
breakfast. None of the balance of us dion't
see nothin', but we all caught an orfuu
cold that mite, cause you see my Pa he
always likes to keep up with the times as
much as he can, and Just before that last
norther when Teller come along selin'
patent heatin' stoves and explained it all TO
my Pa how one of them stoves would save
half the fuel used in the kind we had, why
Pa said he'd take two of 'em and save all
the fuel SO he sold our old stoves TO
secondhand man and put up the new ones,
thinkin' If one OF them would
save half the fuel two of 'em would save it
all, and he never had no coal sent down, and
that's how we all got such Il cold My Pa,
he says that stove man is u frawd and Tor
everybody who reads THE GAZETTE to look
out for him and not to believe him about
them new-fangled stoves. We are all mitey
sorry about my Ant Lavender Pants
ketchin' such j cold cause you see she's
got loud and unusual voice and takes 20
singing right smart, and Pa he says as
how it mite do her voice up for sIngin'.
None of US knowed what a voice Anty had
till the piano tuner come to tune the piano
next door to US, and Anty benz over there
and sOrter friskin' around the young man
he asked her to sing for him, and she cid
and it pleased him so much that he LATED
right out loud and told Anty by all means
to hold onto that voice of hers till ne come
come around again and he'd tune it for her
and not charge cent. Well. Anty she was
sorter stuck up about it for awhile and kept
hintin' to Pa about an organ and vocal
lessons and such like and one day here
comes Pa and an express wagon and Pa
comes in and says, says he: Here, girls, is
your organ" and shure enuh here come the
express man luggin' an old hand organ and
Pa said as how he got it cheap at an auction
sale, and all it needed was new crank and
it would play as good as new. ALI my ants
liked to PLANTED and fell back in it when
they saw that old thing, and Ant Lavender
she told Pa that he would do splendid fol a
crank, and Ant Mollie she's sorter educated
and funny hke) she said mebby Pa could act
the monkey, and they made so much
fuss that Pa dumped the old orgain out IN
the wood house and my old cote butted the
hind sites often it and got one of his horns
stuck in the inwards of the thing and ha-
vorted and belered like kaff till big po-
liceman that was asleep on the next corner
come runnin' up and wanted to know what
number the alarm was turned in from.
Poor Pa, he said he thought an organ was
an organ ard If he got one with a crank to
it the whole family could play on it without
takin' musick lessons, but the girls wouldn't
have it and it hurt Pas feelings.
Some of my Pas lady friends in Fort
Worth sent him a pretty bunch of roses
yesterday, and you orter seen how proud he
was of 'em, and he wouldn't let me and my
ants tuch 'em nor hardly look at 'em; and
he stuck 'em in a wash-bowl full of water
over mite SO they'd keep and sat up half the
mite ritin' some pretty verses; my Ant Mol
lie she sneaked 'em out and copied em, and
here they are:
my hart Feldt thanks can't Express,
So / send them BY the Mail:
Them roses Was red and Nifty sweet
and so is Sugar and you're Another.
Yours geographically,
NICHoDEMUs PANTS
Aunty she says the first two lines is pretty
hut l,nln is hnl thl.rrn