Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1891-10-24
AN EGOTISTICAL EPISTLE.
Boss Wells is Not at All Slow
About Putting Himself.
A sample Of Vain Glory OF which it
Would be ID inicnlt TO Find Far.
allel-Haw "l' DO Tbipg..

Would be ID ificalt TO Find a Far.
allel-How "l' Do Tbipg..
If Mr.. Wells does not get the reputa-
ton of being model postmaster it will
not be the fault of Mr.. Wells himself.
As a matter of course it does not make
any difference to the pubic in general
what kind of a postmaster Mr.. Wells is,
so that the government tailor at WASH
ington is satisfied. and that he may be
satisfied, he has called upon Mr.. Wells 10
write up little account of himself and
how he does things. The latter has complied
with the suggestions of bis superior, and
the result is about as remarkable parcel
of egotism as could be put together.
As an apology for the boss vain
glory thus expressed, the Union
makes the strange confession that the re.
port followed the postmaster generals
public flattery of Mr.. Wells methods and
before, in fact, he knew them. and in
which the Rock Island Office was termed
"a model office" But without dwelling
at any length on the unfortunate revela-
ton that Rock Island should have merely
come in for the praise so freely bestowed
by Mr. Wanamaker on all his political I'm
der Office holders and that the stereotyped
application, "a model Office" was no
particular distinction after all,
the public will be apt to devote its atten-
master Wells personal report" which
the Union has come so mysteriously into
possession of. To the mind of the aver
age citizen it would appear strange that
citizen holding public Office should
deem it necessary to explain that he had
given the Office. ''close personal attention.
as without that, no business can be a
success, aud have 10 oked on the post.
Office as being my business during my
are few other quite entertaining little
passages in the boss personal epistle of
which the public should not be disprived
the privilege of reading, and hence they
are reproduced in THE ARGUS in the most
condensed form:
Il have now eight carriers with from
two to four deliveries per day. which
are made promptly and 10 the enti.
satisfaction of the public"
Il have my carriers. in the business
n rt nf tho aifu rnokn trn npllanrinnc Of
night. one at Z for all mails going
south and west, and one at 8 for
trains going east
Il use Brsdstreets Commercial Report
to fad firms where letters have been
missent to Rock Island 1t seems that
when a man begins TO write the name of
q town beginning with "R," he puts
down Rock Island, Nearly all these
letters can be delivered by using Re-
port Where letter is directed TO
firm not in Rock Island and they cannot
be found in report, return them to the
sender, explaining that no such firm is in
this city"
Il use the telephone to find how mail
trains are for time, and if they are too
far behind the carriers are sent out with
the mail on hand"
Il pay of 10 railway postal clerks. and
do not hesitate to ask for all the informa>
ton want on the subject of sending let,
tiers. They are so well posted that they
can be of great assistance to the postoff1 ce,
and find them very accommodating
II try to make the money order system
popular. and am glad to say that the bus
mess is increasing all the time; more for
eign orders are issued than eyer before.
and the public are pleased with the con-
duct of the money order department To
make postofice popular the postmaster
must study to please the public"
In conclusion the boss has one of his
funny attacks, and this is what strikes
him as fitting finale of a business post
masters report to his superior, on how 10
run public office:
Pay particular attention to the kick
ers, for they can tell postmaster lots of
| things he doesn't know-be prompt in
| answering rquiries-eouslly as prompt
| in looking up lost letters, parcels, money
| orders, postal notes, etc. If he does all
this and the public are still dissatisfied,
be had better resign. land go'-not west,
but south, where if they don't like a post
| master they will kill him."
After residing Mr.. Wells remarkable
letter 1t is just possible to imagine that
Rock Island would not have suffered to
any considerable extent if the author had
begun his public career in the sunny
eli Of MILK ha L.