davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-09-23
Artistic Advertising.

Undoubtedly the Ivory Soap people de-
serve credit for the best grade of illustra-
lions now being used for advertising pur-
poses. The series of full-page drawings
which have been appearing ON the last
page of the Century represent some of the
most capable book and magazine artists in
the country. The series must have cost no
small figure. AS yet the ''way up" artists
do not sign the work they do for adyertis-
ers, but apprehend that it will not be long
ere we shall see in the advertising columns
such names as George Wharton Edwards,
E. w. Kemble. etc. Such men as these
bring to their work, besides mere mechan-
ical Skill a trained Imagination and an
artistic conception of things. These quail
tiles, when used in connection with adver-
tisements, command scarcely less interest
than when used in the ordinary literary
way.-P:i7tte1's Ink, Aug. -, 1891.
CHAT goes without saying" said
Miss Blocker in the course of converse
ton. YES" replied Miss Backaway,
Of Boston; cit perambulates without
articulation. "-Judge.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-09-23
A Sure Thing.

An early risers outfit is one of the
recent electrical novelties. 1t has a de-
cided advantage over the old alarm
clock, which would run down and allow
the early risers to take another nap.
The electrical outfit does not need any
winding. 1t keeps up its nerve-graf-
ing .jangle for two hours, unless turned
off. The early riser is bound to get out
of bed and cut off the currrnt.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-09-23
JACK and Jill went down the hill

JACK and Jill went down the hill
10 get pail of lager;
Some words were passed and Jack at last
Began to cuss and fog her.
He Knocked her down and broke her crown,
And kicked without cessation,
Until cop caused him to stop,
And took him to the station.
Next morning Jill las women willy
Forgave him for the drubbing;
His fine was paid with what she made
by going out and scrubbing.
Detroit Free Press.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-09-23
A Dream of Happiness


Ma be followed by morning of ola Grippe"
Easily, and why Because the displacement of
covering in bed, neglected draught from q
partly closed window, open transom con-
nected with a windy entry in hotel, may con-
yey TO your nostrils and lungs the death-deal-
ing blast. Terrible and swift are the inroads
maze by this new destroyer. The medicated
alcoholic principle in Hosetter's Stomach Bit
tiers will check Inc dire complaint. A persist
ence in this preventive of its further develop
ment viii absolutely checkmate the dangerous
malady. Unmedicated alcoholic stimulants are
of little or no value. The just medium is the
Bitters. Not less efficacious is it in cases of
malaria, biliousness, constipation, rheumatism,
dyspepsia and kidney trouble. The weak
usually those upon whom disease fastens first.
Invigorate with the Bitters.
THE WRONG FLAvoR-Mrs. Beach-"I
think you have made slight mistake"
Grocer = How SO, MADAME" Mrs.
Beach = This sand tastes salty. l
wanted it sweetered. "-Puck
Bronchitis is cured by frequent small
doses of PisO's Cure for Consumption.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-09-23

Checked
the frightful inroads of Scrofula
and all blood-taints. DR.. Pierce's
Golden Medical Discovery purifes
and enriches the blood, cleanses the
system of all impurities, and restores
health and strength. It cures all
diseases arising from impure blood.
Consumption is one of them. It's
simply lung-scrofula. In all it's ear
lier stages, the "Discovery" effects
a cure. It's easy to see why. The
medicine that masters scrofula in
one part, is the best remedy for it in
another. 1t IS the best. It's war
ranted. It's the only blood and lung
remedy that's guaranteed to benefit
or cure, or the money will be re-
funded. No other medicine of it's
class does it. How many would be
left if they did?
It's the cheapest blood purifier,
sold through druggists, Ono matter
how many doses are offered for a
dollar,) because you only pay for
the good you get.
Your money is returned if it
doesn't benefit or cure you.
Can you ask more?
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-09-23
Made To Look Like New.

Dresses, Gents Clothing, Feathers, Gloves,
etc, Dyed or Cleaned, Plush Garments
Steamed at Otto Pietch's Dye Works, 246 w.
Water ST., Milwaukee. Send for Circular
PERsIFLAGE ON TAP.-He-"I have had
you in my mind a good deal lately, Miss
Helen" She-"You always did try to
make me feel small, Mr.. Chumply."-
BrOOkLJo Life
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-09-23

SHE-"What shall | say when papa
asks me what your prospects are 2.
He--"Tell him expect to have one of
the richest men in town for my father
ln-laW O-FrHnE TesHeS
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-09-23

FoGG says fierce thunderstorm re-
minds him Of an onion. 1t is peal on
peal.-BOston TRANSCRIPT.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-09-23

THE latest popular ballad is entitled
"He Never Came Back" This is prob
ably due to the fact that he did not
have a round-trip ticket. = Louisville
COn1roerci0I
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-09-23

M. l.. THOMPSON & Co., Druggists, Cou
dersport, Pa, say Halls Catarrh Cure is
the best and only sure cure for catarrh they
ever sold. Druggists sell it, 70c.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-09-23

FITS.-An Fits stopped free by DIR. K1ine's
Great Nerve RestOrer. No fits after first day suse.
Marvellous Treatise and g GO trial bottle free TO
Fit cases. Send to Dr. Kline 931 Arch ST., Phlla Pa
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-09-23
The Only One Ever Printcd-Can
You Find The Word?

There is 3-inch display advertisement
in this paper this week which has no two
words alike except one word. The same
is true of each new one appearing each
week from The DR.. Harter Medicine Co.
This house places Crescent" on every
thing they make and publish. Look for
it, send them the name of the word, and
they will return you BOOK, BEAUTIFUL
LITHOGRAPHS, or SAMPLES FREE.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-09-23

"M1NE is a checkered career" sighed
the champion chess-player.- Washing
tom Star.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-09-23

'Is that the president of the bank ?"
(Which one ?" THAT stylish-looking
fellow who says 4 and the board of di-
rectors' SO much" ''No, that's the jan
itOr - BYOOEZ7rn life
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1891-09-23

Bronchitis is cured by frequent small
doses of Piso's Cure for Consumption.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

The Washington Post credits Secre-
tary Blaine with telling story illus
trative of President Lincoln's some
what free manner of receiving dignifed
officials
At the beginning of session OF
Congress Mr.. Blaine had been APP
pointed by the Speaker of the House
of Representative member of the
joint committee to wait upon the Presi-
dent and inform him that Congress
had duly assembled Senator Foot OF
Vermont, one of the most dignitied OF
men, was chairman of the committee.
On being ushered into the presence
of the President, Mr.. Foot involun-
tarily struck an attitude, and pro
ceeded to say. in his stateliest manner
mir. President, we have been APP
pointed committee on the part of the
two houses of Congress to apprise YOU
that they have met and ganized, and
are ready to receive any communica-
ton which it may be your pleasure to
make to them"
AS he concluded, Mr.. Lincoln stepped
up to him, and taking him familiarly
by one button of his coat, said:
Now. look here, Foot, if it is mat
ter of life and death with you, I can
send my message in to-day; but if it
isn't, I should like to keep it till to-
morrow to slick it mp little"
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

500 feet, with tail as small as II file
In shape ii has resemblcd q fish, q bird
q beast. 1t has chased ships and fash
ionablc summer resort bathcrs, and is
only cqualcd by the Flying Dutchman,
that phantom ship which last century
made ocean travel very uncanny and
unpleasant.
The moon myth was another favoritc
with voyagers, Sailors used to allegC
{ that if u man went to sleep under the
equator with the moon shining in his
face, the lunar orb would draw his face
awry all to one side, and he could only
get it straight again by lying in an oppo-
site direction the next night. This was
about as reasonable as that adopted by
the doctors Il few decades since, who
were wont to cup and Deed their patients
for nearly every imaginable disease
under the sun.
Our land has had its myths. Two of
them arc worth noting: Years ago,
everybody believed the story about the
Great American Desert This western
tract OF territory was said to be u vast,
arid waste, fairly whtcned with the
blcachCd bones of travellers who had
died in vain attempt to reach Calfior-
MIA. 1t was only in 1910, when pioneers
crossed the plains in large numbers, that
this story was found to be a fiction.
1t is only since the signal service has
been organized that the true source and
direction of storms have been accurately
learned. 1t was supposed for years that
as the wind blew from the east, the
storms came also from that direction.
We know that Il wind always blows
against an approaching storm, the storm
being the cause, and the wind the effect,
instead of vice versa, as originally be-
lieved.
These are only a few OF many of the
exploded myths OF history. 1t has taken
the light and int ligence of modern
thought to gain the truth, where error
prevailed for many centuries.
WELDON J. COBB.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12
Rememberin. His Prisons.

Some people would think it strange
that ! should still regard that cell in
which / spent nearly n year of solitary
continement-with affection, but it is
true. Man is n domestic animal, and
to n prisoner with twenty years" on
his door the cell is home. [ look back
with fond regard to great many cells
and great many prisons in England
and Australia, which are associated to
nv mind in way not to be wholly
understood by any one but myself
And If ever / should go back to En-
Gland which is doubtful, for | ESCAPED
from mi on in Australia in 1869, and
so permanently ended the twenty
years. the first place | would visit
would be one of the old prisons. Re-
member, my name and many passing
thought are scratched and written on
many small place within those cells.
which perfectly well recollect. and it
would be a great treat to go back some
day and read them. And then, during
the time / was IL prison, | got &C
ouainted with thousands of profession
nj criminals, old and young, who will
be the occupants of the English jails
for the next twenty years, and con
fess it would be of great interest to
me to go back and walk the corridor
with all the brimming responsibility
of n visitor, and stop when / saw
face | knew of oil, and observe how
time and villainy had dealt with it
From the UnpUbttShed MSS. OF John
BOYLE OReiitq.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

per hat onto one Of his knucklcs, deftly
curves the fingers SO as to produce the con-
tour OF face, carries out an arm hold
ing rod on which ball is balanced by
extending his thumb with quill, to
which is affixed little bail, dashed to it,,
and tho "balanccr" stands forth com
plete.
Still moro ingenious is "Thc Athletic
Clown" which invariably produces a
roar Of amazcmcnt. How, says the au-
dicnco, can Il shadow Of that size hold u
chair in it's mouth?
1t is easy enough, as our picture shows,
with an accompanying hand equipped
with diminutiVc chair, tiny dumbclls,
etc.
man." in the shadow picture, and II boat
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12
LIVES OF GREAT MEN.

All Remind Us of Biographical Chestnuts
The first man who ever wrote an
other mans life probably was ham
pered by lack of facts If he were not,
would he have laid so much stress on
the fact that his hero was born of such
or such parents, of such or such race,
and then conjectured that from said
parent or parents he inherited such or
such traits?
Wonder who was the first historian
to introduce this now hackneyed
method?
See, here are some samples of the
trite phrascology of which his example
has caused others to be guilty:
His parents came from Yorkshire,
Eng, and from them he inherited the
deep sincerity of the Anglo-Saxon
character"
Coming of good old Pilgrim stock,
he early evinced II predisposition for
theological controversy, etc"
"Of genuine Puritan ancestry, no was
anything to please readers)."
His parents were Irish, and from
them he inherited (anything to please,
but especially WITT"
Born in Boston, he had all the ad,
vantages." Here are worked in at,
, mosphore, literary, not east wind i'll.
stitutions of learning, not penal
"A Virginian by birth, he was fine
type of the Southern gentleman. .
| Here are worked in mother of Presi,
| dents, Old Dominion, etc.
His parents were Scotch, and tC
such origin must be attributed (good
| place for intense religion feeling, some
thing about Bobby Burns, etc."
"Of humble parents he never forgot
the people" (Self-made man Is also
! added
"The son of German immigrants, he
was noted for his sobriety, love of
mercantile pursuits, etc"
But of all the time-worn phrases,
"born of poor but honest parents" is
! the worst Not only is its age against
it, but it suggests either that poor peo-
pie generally are dishonest, or that il
the hero's parents had been rich they
could not possibly be honest-two
propositions equally absurd.
But think what we are coming to
No doubt the following will be found
in the biographies of the future
His father was n fine Chinaman,
and from him the son inherited his de-
lightful humor, prepossessing counte,
nance and fashionable clothes"
"In his veins flowed only the pure
blood of the noble Comnnches, which
accounts for his imperturbable good
nature. strict honesty and civilizing
tendencies.
His father was descended from n
bona-tide oklahoma boomer, and from
this source he inherited his love of
poetry and fine arts.
His parents spoke over the first
telephone ever put up in Bla2eryille,
Wis, and to their adventurous spirit
must be attributed the stupendous
enterprise that characterized his
careet."
Where this style of biography may
stop the Lord only knows boston
Globe
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

appearance, but they loom IN tromon-
1ously on the screen. Let us take tho
Eiffol Tower. 10 '''"o inc
mere we still have simplicity, but tho
form ana the impression of magnitude
Oh o., the vast tower are we'll produced
Inc spectators are enchanted. and ali
'hlS IS done by bringing the forefnccrs
ana thumbs together, and holding in tho
oshcr outstretchcd fingers conical piece
OF pasteboard. 1t is, says Trcwey, the
simplicity of this that makes it great
Next III order comes the "The Balanc-
or' capital subject In this one
lrcwey has increased the number of his
accessories. Presto! he fits little ma
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

1.-Two dcrtlv managed by the interiors;
,ion Of slip of Paper across the shadoW r.
b b Of paper held between the hn ogG.S the
s.. y n"| ~ E Viii II are artfuIly arranged
M Simulate Is the face OF man. ana Inc
TO S ,,,h wIth tiny whip tied to it appears
t I'll shad"w as an arm outstretched w''"
IL whip. .ro.,or facing "rhe
roa"nca Donkey" with his Wnlp nr.n ~ ~
IS h'I 10 't bring tho beast to the "''''"'' Oh
attention ,, ,rottv littlc series,
,,.hinh always cicits cries ., 49, ,,'n
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12
Very EXpressIXe.

Nabor-How are matters, around to
your church now, Parson Limberlip?
Parson L.-Mighty active, sab!
Mighty active!
Nabor-Things are fourishing with
you, Ell?
Parson Fl'urishin'? Yo' struck
onter der ve'y word Eff yo'd been
yo'seF ter de 'sistovy meetin' las night
an see de razors in de ar yo' couldn'
'spress yo'sel mo- plum wild de sitter.
walton.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

that alleged marvel, which later were
proved To be tho VcrcSt tictions.
Some of those will readily remember
the old Biographies which used to con-
tain picture Of a wonderful maoIstrom,
located of the coast OF Norway This
terrible volume Of water was reported
by sailors to actually exist, II Vcritablc
marine mon Stcr which lowered in space,
ready to cngulf and dcvour any ship
that came near its broad vortex. 1t has
never yet been discovered by actual eX-
plorers, and has at last been rclcgatcd
to the obScurity whence it emanated-
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12
NUMBER 40.
HUMOR.
lie Told the Truth.

President Board Of Police Commits
sioners - We are sorry to say, O'Hoo a
han, that you are discharged from the
,orce.
O'Hoolahan-An' fer wphat cause,
yer honor?
Presidential ewelry store was burg
larized in your district last night. Did
you meet any one on your beat last
aight?
O'Hoolahan -Yis, your honor /
met man an he said, said he, he WINS
going to open jewelry sture.
President-He did open jewelry
store and stole So, 600 worth of goods.
O'Hoolahan--The man may have
been n thafe, but he wus no liar. --Jeac-
elerS' Circular.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

UNCHAUSEN is
laughed at in this
age of the world
as Il clever weaver
OF marvellous adj
ventures border
ing on the inn
probable, and yet
he was nothing
less than a satir-
ist on the popular
superstitionS o f
his day. Super
stition, however,
is scarcely the
word - myths of
history would be
FAR more appro-
pirate, and the
b 90 k S of real
travel published a
cen fury sin C o
abound in deScrip-
tiOnS of these as
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

mlators in Europe, and it
to see followers
ysnrUg up all over America.
%ladoW pictWroS." ombrcS
,N the French call them, after
~, who invented everything
long before our civil
vas thoUght OF, are produced by
rDrorcSS ot projecting upon Il
wtIcS obtained Ivy the aid Of
.wpoScd Between the wall and
02ra0dOc or lamp.
@.. happens t. be transparent,
""ohi0g at the silh0uttcs, as
rs tUrongh, they seem to be
@ In consequence, when the
'ar thrown upon Il screen, be-
+" the performer sits, with tho
.M him, the effect is marvel
fake one Of the very simplest
.>@hIoctS to illustrate. Here
.0j When shown it produces
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

man who seems much moro real than
shadows generally are.
Another change Of the flexible fingers;
the thumb this time donS Il tall paper hat
and the wrist has u bit Of drapcry
thrown over it. We have before us the
bent and docrcpit figure of drunkard
holding his bottle in his hand. 1t is like
magic.
But still bottor than all these is "Thc
Learned Donkey" composition III
which the whole resources OF both hands
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12
Preparations for the Spring.

First Boston maiden-Oh, mamma
and have been awfully busy to day.
And what has made you so busy?
First Boston maiden-We have been
getting out and cleaning our spring
spectacles.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12
ItLooIed Like Ono, but Was Not

Alice Gn Henry Stanley's library =
Oh, Mr.. Stanley, what queer neck
lace that is over your mantel! How
unique! Where did you find it?
Henry Stanley quietly That's a
petticoat that q belle in Umji Jimji
wore Mt Queen Ouou Hehe's reception.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

possibly the exaggerated fancy Of some
mariner who witnessed u heavy storm
at sea.
Books that were really valuable in
their day may yet be found which have
pictures of the giant races of Patagonia.
There are some tall people at Terra del
Fuego, but not above the average height.
A race of pigmics has been discovered
more than once, but they have all died
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

from tliAINi
append ".rEo pa ,,i,'
nurt and " The
Snail" two of the
tr;nmphs of Trcwey's
genius. L h 9 y ex-
main Il emsclves; so
we need add moth
ing, except a caution
that all the positions
<of the hands must | G
preserved with the
very greatest pre-
9 sion. or the results
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12
THE MYTHS OF HISTORY.
ALLEGED MARVELS THAT HAVE
PROVED FICTIONS.

The Mighty whirlpool or the Norwegian
Coast, the Great American Desert, and
the Deadly Upas Tree, the Existence of
Which We're once Taught in Our School
books, We're Veritablo Myths -- Other
silly Eictions of History.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

ers-by. Poets and orators still use it as
simile, but the natives where it grows
employ il to lindle fires, with little row.
erence for its reputation among the civ
ilized nations.
RThc sea-serpent myth, like the Flying
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

out before modern progress could reach
their place of residence.
Myth four was the upas tree. Accord
ing to some writer's this wonderful
growth of nature had arms that would
enfold and kill victim, or exude pois-
oned atmosphere that was fatal to pass
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

is held in the upper hall Of the famous
"Black Cat, )" a cafe frequcnted by young
literary Bohemians, and fashionable
Iarls goes to see it once a year.
By means Of puppets, beautifully cut
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

Dutchman myth, is one that time cannot
kill. This serpont is numerous and
ubiquitous. 1t has been seen in nearly
every ocean, upon nearly every sea
coast. It's length has varied from so
feet, with head as large as a house, to
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

Widow Hardfare QandladyI-My
husband used to say, poor man, that
he always felt better for it if he got up
from the table just little bit hungry.
Sarcastic Boarder tonly week be-
hind with his board and cons euuently
iudepe ndent)I s'pose, Mrs. Hardrare.
that Your husband felt good pretty
much all the time.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

VAN buren, was constant attendant
though not member of the Dutch Re-
formed Church in undertook, n. I.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

~, tue ~ monster monsters which no one VIII r'eos-
MIC. .hodow theater In Paris
,.' uoi has attained great esiepf''S' ~
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

out and dressed with great ingenuity,
thc spectator sees reproduced before
him all the pGgeants of the time of the
First Napoleon, the celebrities Of the
revolution, etc
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

there and I'll throw away this cane,
rub up my legs with liniment, and fur
the next week I'll jump on q street car
without its stopping or break my back
trying !"-Free Press.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12
Yo,v SILHOUETTES.
.un CURIOUS PlCT--
\ 30 an THE WALL.

,.. 1uduIgcd in by NJ. Trewcy--
p r,cntod FrcncIman Can
nh His Hand and II Light
,uotc Ills Ingenuity.
,ooto" is the namc invented
D.,r fine passion for making
'.boncrtcs, ait"r the manner OF
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12

actual facts. Mon who were boys half
Il century since can recall the wonder
ment with which they regarded this and
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-03-12
again employed

| ''' ~ WIZ aAiANA- -
the beginner, diff
cult positions. In
shadow pictures, If Il
Ilngcr varies by the
hundrodth part Of an
inch from the posi-
ton laid down for it
IN the diagram from
which the original
practice is obtained,
the result will be n
faulty image.
Hero is another fig
Urc which Trcwcy
In his entertainments