The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-06-13
BRIGHT SIT ).


II had as much mopey as Pennsylvania
politician can't resist temptation, I'd dig a
monument to myself as tall au artesian well.
Detroit hree Press.
''wHAT do you think the best advertising ne
dunn"
Il couldn't tell you: really know very little
about the spiritualists. PUCK.
A POLITICIAN with a pull addressed this letter
to an official at the head OF the police depart
ment: Dear sir: My father is too old to
work Can you put him on the force?"-P hnd-
deiDhtd Record.
In VIEW of the fact that silver dollars of 1904
are worth Sl,h0J APIECE Colorado seems TO be
overlooking an opportunity when she fails 70
ask for the free coinage of few of that date
Detroit Free Press.
TWAS the intelligent compositor who changed
"a miss is as good as a mile" to "a miss is as
with pardonable pride. that means some
thing. "-Boston Transcript,
ANGRY CUSTOMER here, have only had
this suit q week and there's a button off.
Taiior-Yes, sir; sewed that button myself,
account.-ClOthter and Fttrnisher.
MISS CALUMET from Chicago)-wly is it that
you New York men always crease your
trousers?
Cleverton-They offer less resistance in the
wind, and we can get around faster.-CLothier
and Furntsher.
SHE-I notice that you are always glancing at
He-Good gracious. You don't suspect for
moment that am weary OF your companyY
She-No. but suspect that you have pawned
you watch.-Hnmorist
Mrs. BRowN-I declare Just hear that
canary sing! It's always so; every time a1y-
body begins to play on the piano. that bird be-
gins TO chatter.
Mrs. White-Yes; one would almost think the
bird to be human.-Boston Transcript.
CLAR1cE-I'm going to palm myself off as be-
ing much younger than am; aren't you:
Dela-Yes. What age have you decided on!
Clarice-Sxteen.
Della-Dear me! Do you want people to say
that you are old enoughto be your own mother !!
-HdrperS Bazaar.
AT SIGHT Of the castor-oil bottle Willie had
| disappeared
"Come dear" coaxed his mother, land take
your medicine like little man."
"You ought to be asian ed" answered a
muffied voice under the lounge, ITO talk like q
| prize fighter. Chicago Tribune.
TEACHERS in the public schools have very fire.
| quent illustrations of peculiar association of
ideas in the minds of their pupils. AT a recent
examination in geography in one of the public
schools the teacher asked: What valuable
| things are taken out of the eartht" Much to
her amazement one young hopeful Immediately
| replied: CLANS and mummies. "-Bostoh
Times.
ENFANT TERRIBLE dntently watching Mrs.
| Scareall, a newly arrived guest who is unpack-
| ing her trunkl-Wel / don't see as you've
brought any rope at all.
Mrs Scareall-Any rope, my dear? Did you
want me TO bring a rope?
| Enfant Terrible-Yes. I've been standing
| here all this while to see q horrible things
that Aunt Jane told mamma you'd be sure to
bring in the clothes line.-Hdrper's BazGr.
''AH old fellow" said Texas gentleman to
| another on the street. so you are married at
last. Allow me to congratulate me, for hear
| you have an excellent and accomplished wife 3"
II have, indeed was the reply. ''She is ac-
| complished. Why, sir. she is perfectly at home
in literature; at home in music; at home in art;
where except"
Except wbatf"
Except at home. ''-Terds Siftfnos.