West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1891-05-07
LIaR.KILN CLUB.
Reports OF Committees on Divorce
and Finance.

said Brother Gardner when tn,
meeting had been opened in du,
form, "to h'ar de reports Of sartIr
committees an discuss de same.
may say right here an now dat an,
pusson who frizzles piece of lcath
or on dat stove, or so fur forgiti
hisself ms to raise an alley winder Il
see il bis dawg am waitin' dowr
dar, is gwine to be fined not less
than TO thousand dollars. Oar an
sartin things dis club believes to be-
wrong, an sartin other things il
believes to be right, an de people OF
dc State of Michigan hev DER ewes
on us an expect us to do our dooty.
We will now listen to de report OF
committees.
Judge Circumstance Lancaster,
chairman of the committee appoin
ted to inquire into the cause and
effect OF divorces. and suggest such
changes as deemed expedient, re-
ported RS follows
Your committee hev traced d.
vorces back to period ober 5000
years aso. De chief cause seems to
be dat husband an wife can't agree.
Some folks think dis fact is power.
full queer, but we doan. If juries
can't agree-if nations can't agree
IF churches, societies, ladies an
clubs bust up bekase they can't
agree-if we differ in politics, re-
ligion, customs an habits, why
81 ould it be expected dat husband
an wife must agree? IL hey a
business partner wild whom | can t
get along de courts gin me a way
out. but some folks nuke a great
hullabaloo bekase de courts ar
asked to separate a couple who
make life miserable fur eaeh 0dd6r.
We would recommend as follows /:
81. No courtship of less'n three
years.
"2. No lynn on either side.
80. Ebery new married couple
has got to move right of by DER
selves to Dakota.
Among the members of the club
discussing the motion to adopt the
above vas Judge Comedown Carter,
who said
Il mr. satisfied dat divorce orter
be made easy arter sartin condi-
shuns are fulfilled, such condishuns
rs dat committee has jist reported.
but whenebcr a wife gifts divorce
it orter be de law dat she leaves ut
least S25 in cash in de house fur de
husband to git along wild until he
can strike new job"
After some further discussion the
report was adopted.
Prof. Singletree White, chairman
of the committee on finance, re
ported as follows
"Your committee has traced de
use of money back to 1000 y'ara b.
c., an has not been able to find dat
de poo man eber had any mo- dan
he has got to-day 1t ar our opin-
yum dat sunthin' orter be done. -
Dis gwine aroun' dead broke ism {
only hurtful to de feelin's, but very
inconvcnient. We would darfore
recommend as folders
81. Expand de currency until de
basket slops ober.
"2. Coin huff silver dat cherry
man will hov an extrl hind pocket
to carry his share.
"3. Make days work six hours
long an de pay sc, but doan hev
too many Of 'em in one week.
~. Bring de price of white
washIn' up at lest 200 per cent.
but knock de price Of meat and
Eaters down to de VERY lowest
notch.
rs. Fix it 50 dat cherry Guild
pusson in dis kentry who wants to
wear diamonds an ride in his ker-
ridge kin do so. but If ridin around
makes his back ache. den fix it so
be kin open Is bink an drink all de
champagne he wants to-"
Waydown Bebee, Shindig Wat
kins, Wbulebonc Howker. GiNtd ~
Jones and others spoke very strong
ly on the question Of sdopting The
report but Broth Gardner arose
and said
Dat report will be- sof dow. .-