The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1891-12-13
but you cannot marry madame. There is
something very fascinating about that idea.
! Cincinnati ENQUIRER.
MARRIED PEOPLE.
The Target of the Horrid funny Eel

The Target of the Horrid funny Eel
lows.
| Snively-I understand that Gazlay's wife
Keeps him in hot water. Snodgrass-No;
It's scold.-PhiladelphiG Press.
The man who continually pirates about
now he Is attached to his wife will fire.
quenty be found tied to her apron strings.
| TEXAS STttngs.
Mrs. Grimm-How did you manage with
your wife away all summer9 MIR. Grum-
DIDN'T nave to manage. Did as pleased.
IN. 7. Weekly.
Mrs. Grabb-Dear me! There comes my
husband. There won't be whole piece of
furniture left in the house by midnight
Mrs, Gadd-Horrors Does he drink, and
is that q case of liquors he is carvings
Mrs. Grabb-No, he doesn't drink. That
new box OF tools. ~. Y. Weekly.
"Do you stay up to receive him when
your husband stays out late at nights"
mo, indeed. l go to sleep very early so 1
can scold him the rest of the night after he
mas come in. without loss of Sleep"
Time was when, with impatient tread,
he watched for her at twilight dim;
NOW Things have changed since they are wed,
0ne now Sits up and waits for him.
w. KHerald
| Mr.. Watts-If that isn't just like a
woman, Buttoning her shoes with hair
pin. Mrs. Watts-I don't care. Didn't l
near you telling MIR. Potts about having to
put on your hat with a shoe horn?
Belle-What do you think Of the idea of
marrying for love? Nell shouldn't think
Twas good way to get it. I've noticed
that married people usually don't seem to
nave any too much love to waste on one an
| other SOmeruiue Journal.
Brown-Of course, it's none of my bust
ness, but feel it my duty to say that saw
your wife reckoning to man right in the
puohc street yesterday. Gray-Beckoning
to man! My wifea Right in the public
street! Brown-Perbaps ought to say it
tnen, It's no consequence. OF course, he
didn't see her, SO there's no harm DONE
Boston Transcript.
REMINDED OF A FILE.
John" said loving wife, s'I wish you
would sing two or three lines of song for
me.n
"What on earth do you want me to do
| that forl'
There is something want you to bring
nome and I've forgotten what it is, but
| mink II remember it if you sing"
The good-natured husband complied and
the charming wife said:
1 remember now. It's hle want"--
| NeD York Press
SOFT ANSWER.
Shell thought married the best man in
town, but find I made mistake.
Hell thought / married the best little
girl in town, and find that was not mis-
taken.
She-Forgive me. Charlie. You know
that don't always mean what say.
He (sotto voce) -Neither do it.-Brooklyn
| Life.
DELIBERATIoN OF PURPOSE
| MIR. Billus, calling down the stairway
MARIA, have the children gone to school Z"
| Mrs. Billus--"Yes."
This is the girls day out, isn't it,"
Yes. She's gone"
This is not the minister's day to call, is
| it,"
"No.n
ANY of the neighbors likely to drop in
during the next hour or so2"
81 think not"
"You are alone then, are youi'
Yes. What do you--"
''Then put some cotton in your ears,
Maria, am going to shave myself with that
new razor you gave me the other day.
Chicago Tribune.