davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1891-05-30

POSTPONEMENT.
Tho above sale Is postponed on account OF
rain until
MONDAY, JUNE /, 1901.
at same hour, C.L. DENOON,
WILLIAM ELLYSON,
my2Q Trrlstees
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1891-05-30
BY Frank ID. Hin & Co,
Real Estate Auctioneers-
CHOICE BROAD-STREET STORE
PROPERTY.
No. 4e5 EAST BROAD STREET, BETWEEN
FOURTH AND FIFTH STREETS,
NOW ocCUPIED BY
MEssRs. FORD & PEATRosS AS A SHOE
HOUSE,
ToBE SOLD AT AUCTION.

ON THURSDAY, JUNE 4, 1891,
on the premises, at 81 o'clock P. NJ, we will sell
that most EIIGIBLY-LOCATED THREE-STORY
BRICK STORE, No. 425 east Broad street, south
side, between Fourth and Fifth streets, at pres
eut occupied by Messrs. Ford & Peatross, and for
years occupied by Charles L. Seigel, Esq, as a
shoe store. IL Ia unnecessary to say word In
favor OF this property, az its unsurpassed loca-
ton and value as a solid investment Is well
known to all businessmen and capitalists. We
will only add that an opportunity like this may
not occur again for n long time.
The LOT fronts 10 7-12 feet by 1873 feet TO a
wide alley In common.
Terms: One fourth cash; the balance on very
easy and extraordinarily long time, TO be an
nounced on day Of sale.
For further particulars apply to auctloneers.
FRANK ID. HILL Il CO.,
nv % Auctioneers.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1891-05-30

j. w. McCARRICk,
General Southern Agent, ONCE Rockets.
w. p. CLYDE & CO.,
no General Agents, Philadelphia.
VIRGINIA STEAMBOAT sExly
COMPANY'S JAMES-RIvER ane& zA<zks
LINE. Cheapest and most pleasant route 70
OLD POINT, NORFOLK, PORTSMOUTH, NEW
PORT NEWS, CLAREhONT, and JAMES
RIVER LANDINGS DIRECT by elegant saloon
steamer ARIEL leaving Richmond EVERY MN
DAY, WEDNESDAY, and FRIDAY at A. VI.
Street-cars go directly 70 steamers wharf. Fare
70 Old Point or Norfolk. sl.50; second class, 81.
Connections at Old Point closely with all lines
for Washington, ID. C., Baltimore, Philadelphia,
and New York same afternoon, James river by
daylight. Great tourist line. Cheapest route.
Tickets only half OF Rail Rates.
Through tickets on steamer and at CARRIERS
Agency, o01 Main street. Baggage checked
through. State-rooms engaged for day or night.
FREIGHTS.
Freight received daily for NORFOLK, PORTS
MOUTH, SMITHFIELD, HAMPTON, OLD
POINT, WAVERLY, HICKSFORD, and ALEX
ANDRiA, VA; WASHINGTON, ID. c.; NEW
BERNE, WASHINGTON, TARB0R0, n. C.; all
stations on the Atlantic and Danyille railroad,
Seaboarc and Roanoke railroad Norfolk South
ern railroad, Farmyille and Powhatan railroad,
Eastern Shore Of Virginia, and all regular land
ings on James river, at LOWEST RATES, and
through bills issued
EXCURSIONS
by NIGHT or DAY 10 NORFOLK, OLD POINT,
VIRGINIA BEACH, OCEAN VIEW, and DUTCH
GAP can now be booked for the coming season.
LUCIEN Is. TATUM, Yice-President,
No l117 Main street and Rockets.
IRWIN WBIsIGEB, Freight and Passenger Agent.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1891-05-30
By X. B. Chaffln 6 Co,
Real Estate Auctloneers,
No. l north Tenth street
TRUSTEES AUCTION SALE
~

OFTHAT
MAGNIFICENT JAMES-RIvER ESTATE
KNOWN AS BELMEAD,
LOCATED IN PoWHATAN COUNTY, VA,
ABOUT FORTY MILES FROM RICHMOND,
CONTAINING 1910 ACRES, MORE OR LESS,
WITH SPLENDID DWELLING AND OTHER
BUILDINGS,
WHICH ORIGINALLY COST ABOUT s75, 900.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1891-05-30
ByJ. Thompson Brown & Co.,
Real Estate Agents and Auctioneers,
1113 Main street.

COMMISSIONERS SALE OF A DE-
~ TACHED BRICK DWELLING ON CANAL
STREET AND A CORNER BRICK STORE AT
THE SOUTHEAST CORNER OF SECOND AND
CANAL STREETS.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1891-05-30

REAL ESTATE AT PRIVATE SALE.
NOR SALE PRIVATELY, WE'LL
IL ESTABLISHED GROCERY STAND, &c,
where live man can make money. Apply TO
my 20-3t APPERSON az 90.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1891-05-30
FOR RENT.

EOR SALE AND RENT, SEV-@
Il ERAL desirable places on the Richmond. II
Fredericksburg and Potomac railroad in Ash
land and between Ashland and Richmond. WIN
sell for cash or instalments. A list win be fur
nished on application. modern COTTAGE
with eight rooms, we'll built, with lot 20Ox0O0
feet, good shade trees. Can be purchased for
$1,000; 900 cash, balance eco per month.
GEORGE K. CRAWFORD,
my 30-2t 1908 Bank street.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1891-05-30
0RK-RIVER LINE. VIA WEST F'I''
THE PAvoRTrE ROUTE NoK4@
LEAVE RICHMOND:

TRAIN No. 10, ElV - ~ ,-t.t
LOCAL EXPRESS, daily, exccp. --s.s
s,ons AZ All stations AZ Lesior MaHor ~. Z,
with stage for wslAerton; vi'A
steamer at vest Point.
TRAIN No. 10, a. 2. NJ so,
BALTIMORE LIMITED, daily, eAoyg p. .g,t'
for West Point, connecting WIN i-,.,-ss
siesmers for Baltimore. Al Ba,Ii'nor 80, x
connect with Baltimore ana - ~
Washington, PhiladelphiA and NJ 80 ,xt2;
steamers leave Baltimore D T. NJ -a-''
Sunday. as A N ssl
l0:4o A. N.
TRAIN No. 40. TAO A. NJ ,.,c.
LOCAL. MixED, daily except $500 i,s;'s't,-,l-
Twenty-third street for West foihs AM
Tctss-offioe at station foo: Of NtsS,789 a. IS
opea a. N. 70 p, ~ and nom T.
AN. -. .,,aet.
SOL. HAAS, JAP. L = Ascgs
JOSEPH = POrIA nisi-ioa rs3'"
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1891-05-30
DIOHMoND AND DANyILL2

DICHMOND AND ID IN Al''-
LII RAILROAD
SCHEDULE IN EFFECT NAY n. l''.
TRAINS LEAVE RICHMOND. H..
2:55 A NJ. SOUTHERN EXPIRES t,.'
lsnta, Augusta, ana 3. 80
Connects az Greoust'0' D.. A..
and Raleigh: az Sai.suiff .. ~.
cru North Carolina ~, s
take sleeper 40 . J.. y.
sieepers from Dauyl.4' >t.+ ..,H..
1925 A. NJ. VIRGINIA AND Npatf t
LIMA EXPRESS, daily, l..-.-
20 Raleigh ga Kry,Yi..r ,...-s
Burkeyille with Norfolk A-i go
railroad for Farmul",
and points West; ~ '''.-
Clarksyille, oxford, i'll I'D
Durham. .,... A..
800 T. N. FAST MAIL, daily ~ Ai'-,'-.., i.
eus,a. AMI poiuts South. coon.
Mosley's function win yarn.
Powbatan raiiroat. lhfV-+.
ers from Danyillle south. ,,,.I.S
connects with the l-sl>ii,,.
AND SOUTHWESTERN - ''-'
LIMITED. s..r.rtf p
600 r. N. LOCAL, daily. eXrfit ,-...l..s
Amelia Courthouse aHi h'''-'
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1891-05-30
AUCTION sALBs-This Day.

By George y. Crawford
Real Estate Agent and Auctioneer,
1905 Bank street, Richmond, Va
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1891-05-30

EOR RENT, 27O6 EAST FRANKS
h LIN STREET; six large rooms, hot andE7
original can be renewed. A nice house and q
BOWMAN, BOSWELL q sHUMAN,
nv 30-2t 1901 east Main street.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1891-05-30
JAMES-RIyER DIVISION
Richmond ami Allegheny KA.-.,J
LEAVE RICHMOND

900 A. VI. daily Tor Lyrcnb4rf N.'.-fr-...
Lexington, AMI Clifton t..s.
4:30 L. N. except sunday frr iY.f. ..-.. ..-
Meeting with train I.tt.s ..-
burg &C . A. NJ. daily f- =
Brilgc, Lexington. a.I ...
Forge. sleeping, 'l ........
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04

"Whatr' exclaimed Texas Justice to a
colored culprit, have you the audacity 10
say you do not recognize this pocketbookw
Eyes, sab"
But it was found in your possession"
"In my what did yer say, jedgef"
in your possession. This pocketbook
was found in your pocket, sir. +"
"Jedge, you has done tole two stories
about dat ar. Fust yer said hit was nm
In my possession, and den yer lowed hit
was foun in my pocket. Bofe dem yarns
can't be true. IF de jedges on de bench
can't tell de troof, hits no wonder dat a
poor, miserable niggah like ME am led
astray."
The justice drew long breath. and once
more producing the pocketbook said
you denied just now that you had ever
seen this pocketbook now ask you again
IL you ever saw this pocketbook l,eforef''
"Why, of course. Hit am de same one
you showed me a minute ago. Yer must
be losing yer mind, iedge"
Remanded to Jail without baill--Texas
Siftngs
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04
Engineer Gas he rounds the curve)-Good
heavens, Bill There's man OH the track,
and can't reverse In time.

Siftings.

The curtain had gone down on the second
act of the opera, but the spell of the COM
poser's genius. interpreted with matchless
skill by the eminent artists who had es-
sayed the leading parts yet fingered, and
a hush had fallen upon the audience.
Maud" said the young man in Il thrill
ing whisper, ''is not even the silence elo-
quent?"
The lovely girl bowed her head and
blnshed at the unmistakable but hitherto
unsupported ardor of the usually cold and
stately young man at her side.
''In moments like this, Maud" he whis-
pered. 1.-THE soul, moved Wy impulses it
cannot resist, sweeps conventionalities
aside and speaks to it's fellow SOUL Hear
me, Maud, hear me, when say
Opera booksl Books of the operap' ppetl
a shrill voice at his elbow
And the conversation thus interrupted
never. never was resumed. Chicago Trib
une
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04
One from Fifth Avenue.

was investigating lot of old relics in
a second hand store on lower Sixth avenue
when coored woman cane in and in
quired for a second hand coal stove
Certainly. 'am-hundreds to select
FROM" replied the dealer. "I'll have my
man to wait on you at once. Here, Henry,
show this lady some coal stoves. How
high did you want to go, ma'amW
"Not very high"
''Then show her those three stoves which
that millionaire on Fifty-ninth street
burned one winter and then sold because
he was going to Italy on three years
trip"
"Yes, sir" replied Henry.
"And if none of them suit her show her
the four dollar stoves got OF that heress
on Fifth avenue last week because the
trimmings didn't match her carpets"
The woman took u Fifth avenue stove"
and she was only seven minutes looking it
over. paying cash down and getting out Of
the store.-New York Evening World.
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04
Aid to Memory.

"Tod" Walters is a ten-yearold boy in
whom the spirit Of mischief and the spirit
OF investigation are developed to an UNI
usual degree at least his suffering grand
parents entertain that opinion. Tod made
them short visit few months ago, and
although they are fond and proud Of their
grandson, it cannot be denied that their
principal feeling when they said gcodby
to him was one OF relief
Neither of the old people had very sharp
eyesight, and they seldom used their spec
tacles except for reading, SO it was not sur
prising that they failed to discover some
peculiar indentations which marked the
top rail of the polished balusters on the
first morning after Tod's arrival. and
which grew deeper with each succeeding
morning.
TO all appearance Tod did not notice
them, either, until the last day of his visit.
Then he announced ia confidence to his
grandmother
"Tm afraid, grandma, that I've male
some marks on the baluster rails with Lay
Waterbury, but you see I've always run
down so fast that never noticed them till
this morning!'
with your Waterbury, Todp' echoed
his grandmother in amazement.
"Why, yes'm. I've wound it by pressing
the winder on the rail, you know, every
morning since | came. 1t was such a
splendid place, and saved such a lot OF
time, because l could do it as l ran down to
breakfast. And always doing it that way,
of course it kept me from forgetting to
wind it, you seep-Youth's Companion.
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04

was sitting with the sheriff In front Of
the town court house. when he suddenly
stood up, shaded his eyes with his hand
and looked across the street, and then
called out;
"Heah, vol Is that yo, Jims"
Acolored man, about fifty years old, who
was slouching along on the other side,
came across tho street and replied:
Eyes, Mars Eenfog, dis am mel'
"And what ar' yo' doing heahs"
"Ize jist wallSin out,sah. dun thought
I'd drap down an see my darter."
How did you get outf
"Jist made hole frew de back wall,
sab"
"Look-a-heah, Jim," said the sheriff, as
he sat down and picked up a stick to whit
tie on, Il amt gwine to stand this fussin
no mo-. This Is nigh about seven times
you's broke out o. Jail"
eyes, sab, nigh bout seben times, sab,
but doan' be hard on me-"
"You's rot out by the doah, the win
dows, the floor, the ceiling and the walls,
and you's put me to trouble and the coun-
ty to expense. New, yo' can't go back
thar no mol''
"Please, sahp'
"No, sab; yo' can't do It'll I've given yo'
u lhiT sHOWt anu w CdH tApccO no Iiios
Yo' kin fist take yo'self off"
But, Mars Renfog, Pze dun bin put in
Jail on a hog case, an PIE got to stay dar'
till dc cote house meets" protested the
man.
II know you were arrested and examined
and bound over, and all that, but I've got
tired of the fussing. l amt going to stand
by and let nobody damage the Jail. Ycu's.
got out and come back, and got out and
come back, and now l won't abide it no
mol Jist take yo'self right Off and don't
come back to my Jail again unless yo' want
to be hard used. II l find yo' breakin in
I'll shoot yo' shores yo'r born"
won't yo' try me jist once mop" pleaded
the prisoner.
mo, sah I've drawed the line, and now
yo' has got to go and take keer Of yo'self.
Pm tellin yo' to scatter befo' ! make yo'
turn to and stop up that last hole in the
wall"
The man scattered in 8 discouraged,
detected way, and as he was lost to sight
down the street the sheriff growled:
"Durn Niger who don't know when
he's being used like bon gentlemanP'-
New York World.
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04

Among tho stories which Professor
Sousz, OF the Marine band, brought back
wiki him from Europe is one about Fred
Candy, the theatrical partner OF Francis
Wilson. Candy found hsmself iii Paris
che day. He found even gay "Paresn dali,
and having no one with whom he could
share his black butterflies, as the French
call our blue devils, he read Shakespeare.
think fellow must be in pretty hnd
way indeed when he is compelled, In Paris,
to read Shakespeare for amusement
Tas ps-ticular piece that Shakespeare
wrote which, Candy read happened TO be
1.-TWO Gentlemen Of Verona" He deter
mined TO 60 to Verona and hunt up the
two gentlemen, II so be ii they survived.
He went and arrived at the ancient capital
of Theodore the Goth without accidep..
Aughting from the train he was accosted
by a courier or guide, who protfered his
services TO show him tine town. Candy in.
quired whether THE Two Gentlemen of
Verona" were still there,
81 nota know them. sare, was the cour-
teous reply of the ppzzled courier.
well what is there in the old town TO
see. anyhowsn inquired the American.
81 can shoa you Juliet's tomba, sare, y
replied the courier
"Jaiet,s tomb--what's thatpn asked
Candy
THE tomba of Juliet. sare. OF Romeo
and Juliet, saren
So they visited the tomb of the lovelorn
heroine The courier pointed it ont, ex-
patiated on the history of the somb and
then described its construction
"The tomb" he said, lis of granite, and
weighs 100 tons. Inside 1t is a marble sep
ulcher which weighs seventy-hve tons. In
side that is stone sarcenhagus which
weighs twenty-five tons. Inside that Is a
leaden casket which weighs five tons. In
side that is the mahogany coffin in which
Juliet lies" Here the courier paused TO
see how the American was impressed.
well old man." said Candy, taking a
long breath, you've got her safe, haven't
YOUR Washington Post.
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04
why HIS Health was So Poor.

The three had discussed indifferent mat
tiers for something like fifteen minutes,
when the tall, businesslike fellow suggest
ed to the heavy set man;
"You look like pretty healthy man"
Eyes, do" returned the heavy set man
frankly. THAT'S the unfortunate part OF
it. If only looked like an invalid. people
would have more sympathy for me-"
"Why, what's the troubleg" asked the
tall man in surprise.
Heart trouble" was the reply. "Im
apt to drop Off at any moment"
"Oh guess it's not as bad as that"
1.-TWO insurance companies have refused
to take a risk on me at double rates. said
the heavy set man promptly.
"Reallyl'' exclaimed the third man in
astonishment. "Why it seems"---
81 know, know. 1t seems preposter-
Gus, but you don't understand the circum-
stances" broke in the heavy set man.
"You see, my father died of heart disease,
my mother OF dropsy, my sister has con
sumption and an uncle practically has one
lung in the grave now. | don't like to
talk of these subjects, but when any one
speaks of my apparently perfect health it
almost seems like sarcasm and feer'--
The tall man interrupted him by move
ment of his hand.
Let's drop the subject" be said. 81
didn't mean to stir up unpleasant thoughts.
1t was just a casual remark, you under
stand"
Certainly" said the heavy set man. ~
assure you take no offense."
And when the tall man had left the
heavy set mans companion turned ON him
and said:
"Why you never told me anything
about
Nor any one else." interrupted the big
nan.
"But"-
"But | happen to know that he's a life
insurance agent. See?"-Chicago Tribune.
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04

He wss standing on the corner of Has
tings and Gratict streets when another
young man about his age came along, and
the first one said:
Look heAh. Mistah Carr. want to gin
yo' few words OBJ advice"
"Well, sahf"
"Yo' seems to be payin yo'r 'tenshuns
somewhat 10 a young lady named Miss
Perkins"
YES, sah--yes, sab.
"Bin buyin her boxes of candy an sendin
up bokays, uaaersSan
"Jes so, ssh"
well, sab. liz order 90 save yo' furder
bodder an expense will inform you dat 1
am dun Engaged TO marry Miss Perkins in
de nigh fucher."
"'Zactly, sab. 'zactly; an in order to save
you furder hodder an expense will inform
you dat Miss Perkins dun becum Mrs. Carr
last eavenir at o'clockl Weddin strictly
privatel No ACKNOWLEDGMENT Free Press
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04
II Was ALL CIRCUMSTANCES.
He sssack . rs~a w+h.r. Truth wa
Cheap.

He Sssack . rs-H whore Truth Wa
Cheap.
This is the sfu-s rs he told it to me "a.
other night at the corner of Broadway ano
Vesey street. Said hes
IF was lazy or extravagant or shiftiess
! shouldn't ask you or any other man fo'
money; I'd be ashamed TO. I'd say de
served to starve or freeze. IT. in nowise M,
fault that am brought 20 this condition.
TITS circumstances, l sapposesn
Exactly I'd been working for man IN
Delaware for nearly year and had saveG
up 500. / started out TO 60 into partner
ship with man buying apples We ex
pected to make $500 in two months. A
mule suddenly kicked the man and he died
the man did. That's circumstances,
amt itg''
Certainly"
"Then somebody robbed a store, and as
they couldn't find anybody else to arrest
they collared me wasn't within fifteen
miles of the store, but they are not at all
particular in Delaware. They didn't claim
| was guilty, but said they paid their con
stables fer hustling and expected them 70
arrest everything lying around loose. Cir
cumstances again, ehs"
Looks like it."
Il wasn't content to stay in Jail. 1t was
too combining, and the sanitary arrange.
ments were bad sent for lawyer and
gave him fifty dollars to advise me. He adj.
vised me to give the other fifty to the jailer
to let me out. See the hand of circum.
stance?''
Yes
"Came out dead broke and headed for
New York expecting to meet friends who
would help me. On the way up tramp
held me up for an exchange of clothes, and
got here to find my friends gone to Europe
for five years tour. More circumstance,
eh?'
PLENTY of it; here's nickel"
He took it in gingerly way, felt of it,
held it out to the. light ON the tip of his
finger and said:
"If that's all you pay for ten feet OF
solid old truth in this town, what on earth
would liar do to get bed and bowl OF
soup?"-New York Evening World.
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04

M Calino, the celebrated French simple
ton, never wishes other people 30 be at all
incommoded by his proceedings.
He had accepted challenge to fight a
duel, and was told that the hour had been
fixed at 9 o'clock for the next day.
"H'mp' said NJ. Calino. 'I'll try to be
there on time, but if Pm little late tell
the other man to begin without me- p
Youths Companion.
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04

A gentleman possessing large and ele-
CANT assortment of household linen,
marked with the letters M. p, which he
purchased for his bride elect, recently de
ceased, is DESTROYS, in order to avoid useless
expense, to make the acquaintance of a
young lady bearing the same initials with
view to matrimony. = Humoristische
Batter.
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04
Working Up Trade.

Mrs. Bingo (after the balD-I liked that
gentleman so much that you saw me talk
ing with tonight. He said that it was all
nonsense that ladies should take cold in
decolette dresses
: Bingo-You know who he is, don't you +
Mrs. Bingo-Why, no. Who is he?
Bingo-He is the owner of one of the
largest drug stores in town.-Cloak Re
view
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04

Reporter suppose'the jewels worn BY
Signori HaTfatti cost her a great deals
Manager-Yes. A few days ago she
stepped on one of the large diamonds
which broke it to atoms and cut her foot.
She'll have to pay doctors bills for at least
twenty-five dollars. -Jewelers' Circular
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04
waiting for Her.

Winkle-Have you seen Miss Twitter in
her new tailor made gown?
Nodd-No. She was out walking when
rallied.
Winkle-Was any one else at homer
Nodd-Yes. The tailor who made it was
there Cloak Review.
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04
What He Could Do.

He looked up and down the street fur
lively two or three times, took in the sign
over the door once or twice and darted in
as if afraid of being caught at it.
''This is an employment agency. amt
it?" he inquired of the man in charge.
"Yep," snapped that person.
''Get work for people, don't your
"Yep."
"Any kind of workr'
"Yep."
"All kinds?"
"Ysp"
SECT something for me to dor"
Yep"
"In a restaurant?'
Eye What in thunder can you do in a
restaurants" exclaimed the boss, catching
himself.
"Eat"
Then he got the bounce. Detroit Free
Press
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04

Miss Popln--You know that young Mr..
Sackerly. Isn't it funny that when he calls
he always asks you to sew on button,
and, of course Toying with her FAM, you
know what that leads to.
Miss Satinette Showing diamond ring
This is what it led to in my case.-Clotb-
Ter and Furnisher.
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04

"We only want economical men in our
employ" said the railroad superintendent
to an applicant fer a conductors place.
oh, that's all right" replied the appli-
cant confidently. 81 can save 5000 year
on a 8. 200 salary. u-Detroit Free Press.
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04
Demands of Society.

The Cook-Oi jist KEN in, mum, to tell
yez thot Oh won't be home to cook ther
dinner this afternoon, bein as Oh wur asst
be Mrs. Jimson's coolinary lady to foive
O'Clock tay to meet tn Jimsons' new Eng
lish butler, what's jist kim over on ther
Cephalonia.- Beacon.
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04

Travers-See here, that last suit ycu have
charged me fifty dollars for. and you know
you never charged me but forty Ave dollars
before.
Tailor-oh, we'll, sir, we won't quarrel
over such small matter. I'll give you
credit for the five dollars.
Travers-You don't happen To have 1t
about You, do yous-CloShier and Fur
nisher
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04
Some Difference.

Comparisons are odorous," said young
sportsman; "the hare is the most cowardly
brute alive, and no mistaken"
''True," growled an old Nimrod, ''but
should like to see what you would do in
it's place if you had it's legs and no gun!'-
Exchange.
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04
Her Favorite.

breakfast" said Miss Passee, sis my
favorite meal"
Naturally retorted Miss Perte; "onel
is younger at breakfast than at dinner. -
Harper's Bazaar.
The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1891-12-04

Little Girl Ode Fashion Flat)-Is that my
new brother? Amt he cute? Did the an
gels bring him?
Mamma-Yes, my dear.
Little Grl--Did they have flaming
swordsf
Mamma-N-o. Why?
Little Girl don't see how they got past
the janitor.--Gcod News.