Fort Worth gazette. [volume] (Fort Worth, Tex.) 1891-1898, 1891-11-02
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THE BUMM Err.

| just in from the Oklahoma Territory anC
| who was present when the grand rush was
| made for homes and glory. He said thai
| among the wild riders who wore revolvers
| about 'em and who scooted over the ground
| at a breakneck pace were lady and gen
tleman formerly of Fort Worth and well
known to many of our citizens and that the
| mere mention of their names would cause 1
| commotion. He said further that the young
| lady rode a bronco with all the ease and
| grace of a cowboy. Their wild rush won a
home for them, which they gained without
accident and some day cards will announce
| that MIR. and Mrs. - will be at nome
to their friends" at their dugout on the
plains.
| ! was fellow victim few evenings since
| with carload of passengers on belt line
| car when an incident occurred which goes
| to show how utterly Indifferent to the III
| convenience of others the average human
| being is The car had Just turned the curve
on Taylor street, when little golden
haired tot came tripping out and hailed the
mOtorman with Mamma will be out in few
minutes, she's only trying to arrange her
new bonnet; you'll wait, won't you?" The
puzzled motorman made no reply, but
looked at the passengers and-waited
Speaking about street cars reminds me:
day, the dozen passengers were annoyed by
q continual clucking and cooling, accom-
panied by low chirping, which they knew
was in the car. but could not locate. The
motornan looked back and saw his passen-
gers, among them four ladies, We're an
noyed, and remarked he'd like to strange
that ventriloquist," but the noise contin-
ued, and a small boy with a bird whistle
was informed if he did not stop blowing
that - thing, he'd be put off, but the I'M
accommodation noise kept up. Finally, just
as the public square was reached, little
man with long whiskers, who had round
hat box under his arm, got off, but as he
did so the ear gave q sudden jerk and he
dropped the box, and out came a fretting
old hen and dozen chirping chicks. The
motorman turned red in the face and re-
marked Had l known it was yez that
was making that Internal racket, I'd have
put yeZ off afore yeZ got Oh at all, at all, so
l would" but the man with the whiskers
was vainly trying to corral his chicks, and
only stopped long enough to shake his fist
At the motorman for dumping him, while
the passengers rOared.
-
was very much amused a few after
Moons since when two rural young men
came in competition for the same young
lady at the car line crossing on Seventh and
Main. One of the young farmers was get
ting on q Riverside car with the young
lady in question, when the other young
man with me squite grass in his locks OBJ
lected TO her accompanying the young man.
Young man No gave young man No. to
understand he mad no chips in that game
and that the young lady dare not board the
car with him, and grasped the young lady's
arm. Her escort resented the interference
by John L. grasp on the other fellows
neck and seat of his jeans and tossed him
about ten feet in time TO cause an Airing
ton Heights motorman to reverse his en-
gine'' in order to keep from running over
the youngster. at which the tall, cookbook
ing young man who engineers the River
side car took his cue and gave his machine
five points down grade, leaving the duck
who got tos sed wild with rage. shaking his
fist at the fast disappearing couple and
swearing he would lick the victor at a camp
meeting soon to begin in his section.
1t is perhaps little out OF date, but the
Bummer heard pretty good one the other
DAY while enjoying two-for at his friends
expense. As it goes, a Federal veteran,
minus both legs and arms and one ear, came
to the Grand Army of the Republic reunion
at Detroit few weeks ago and asked char
ity by the roadside He received generous
donations from all hands. One day tall,
broad-shouldered Southerner came down,
looked him over carefully, and then draw
ing out good-sized roll, dropped a IS bill
in his tattered cap.
'Stop, there!" cried the cripple, 'you
have made mistake
mo, sab, not q bit of it. You're welcome;
good day sab"
xviii you kindly give me your name7 I
have never received so large a donation be-
fore"
MY name doesn't matter, sab; good day
sah.''
But, sir, will you tell me what prompted
you to give me so large an amountl''
Because you're the first Yankee soldier
l ever saw trimmed up to suit me; now
good day sab" and the Southerner walked
rapidly away. -.
An amusing incident occurred a few
nights since in the rotunda of the Pickwick,
and The hummer happened to be in hear
ing. A group of gentlemen, composed of a
well-hnown Fort Worth banker, who is
noted not only as pronounced Democrat,
but man of stong Southern sympathies,
and two Northern Republicans of radical
procllvlties were conversing pleasantly to-
gether The conversation drifted smoothly
along until they struck politics, when, all
unconscious of the bankers political
opinions, one Of the Northern gentlemen
exclaimed: swell. I'm Republican, and
don't you forget it.''
The banker was fired, and. stretching
himself back in his chair, he said, with an
air of pompsus indignation: You'd better
forget it, and that d-n quick, tool"
-
There's no use worrying about what
don't come your way" said genial Main
street saloon man to The hummer few
days since. "a mans days on earth are too
short, and fretting don't help matters as l
can see. When man does the best he can,
he should let it go at that. If l was to fret
about everything that happens to me, why
I'd go6razy. To show you, only q couple Of