The Pascagoula democrat-star. (Pascagoula, Miss.) 1878-1920, 1891-04-03
G:heDrmorraf-S Star
A 1T OFT ~ TRADE.
DEDICATED TO COUNTRY rDIroE.

To The country editor The above
remark is quite familiar. II il {
song he hears from the first day 0I
January until The last day of the
next December. The newspaper
man depends principally upon his
advertising patronage for the sup
port OF the paper, and when he
asks a merchant to advertise. 90!
out OF each 100 will say: ''Wel.,
I'll give you an advertisement il
you'll take it ont in trade" To
make matters worse. the majority
refuse to advertise their wares I'M
less such an arrangement is made
with the editor.
The dry goods man wants you to
take it out in trade.
The grocery nan insi is that
you take it out in trade.
The saloon man swears that you
must drink it out.
The butcher says You must eat ii
out in beef.
The livery man declares that
you must ride it out. The leather
dealer insists on making you a
saddle, while The undertaken is
willing 10 put in a little al. pro-
vided the editor will let him take
his measure for a coffin.
| was once the proud owner and
perpeirator of Il great cosmopoli.
tan weekly-the Lampasses Dis
patch-a1d like every other young
and ambitious editor plunged into
the journalistic maelstrom with
more confidence than brains and
less money than either. My saluta-
tory was a boquet of rich and rare
exotics plucked from The fields OF
fancy, interspersed with bright and
witty little bon mols, worth about
60 cents per mot. In my wild en-
thusiasm | made promises in that
salntatory that bread cast upon
the waters returned continually
and YER very troublesome.
May Moons have waXed and
waned since | penned that glowing
literary gem aud sent it flying TO
my 127 paying subscribers ard L.
1873 deadhesds, but | must say |
am not so proud of il as l once was.
| think every one who read that
paper cut out my salutatory and
pasted it in their books. My first
resolution was to print paper
that would please the great throb-
bling public-not a portion of The
people, but all of them. | soon
discovered that | had a govern.
ment contract on my hands. The
second issue | printed contained
an editorial entitled, did john
the Baptist baptize by miners on?'
and every Methodist subscriber
stopped his paper. The next week
l wrote an able leader, healed
''Campmeelings the Safe Guard OF
our Country" and the BapliSts
stopped their papers, but the
Methodists al called around and
renewed their subscriptions. had
considerable trouble with all relI-
Cious denominations but managed
to keep The full membership of
some of them on my books.
My next trouble arose with The
advertisers, and desiring to 1--we at
peace with God and all mankind. I
| agreed 10 Grade out" every adj
vertisement in the paper. When
hiring a printer | had it distinctly
understood that | was 10 pay them
with ''orders" for goods on various
houses that advertised in The pa
per, and seldom had any trouble.
except in one instance when having
done some rlnting for a preacher,
/ gave a typographical tourist an
order on HIM for ST. worth ol
preaching and Is cents worth of
Sunday school, the printer became
slightly personal in his remarks
and said he didn't think he would
make a success rs an evangelist,
and proposed to swap both orders
10 another printer for three drink
checks and a meal ticket. | dis
charged him after giving him u GET
lie reprimand. OF course | some.
lines found some difficulty IN pleas
ING each particular printer in giving
the "orders" but | managed TO get
The way ! managed was
to alternate the "orders" amonp
the printers, ~reserving the saloon
advertisements to make change
with.
Before the first twelve months
out my advertising ''ordcrs"
were used like street car tickets at
all The stores aud were quoted ac-
cording to their market value.
dry goods, hardware,
feedstore. restaurant, ~barbersliop.
lunchcounier and saloon "orders"
were quoted at 81 rs, while livery
blacksmith, wood and re.
pair shop. laundry, lawyer, doctor.
undertaken, sheriff and second
hand store went down as low as
Is rs.
Al last The patent medicine man
came along aud | secured one hun.
dred Editorial Puff cigars and
Twelve dozen quarts OF "Tolu Rock
and Rye" The cigars were natur-
al c~uriosities. | had an autopsy
over one and foun6 almost every
known 10 The scientific
world underneath its Early York 3,
wrapper.