Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-11-12

rage, ana MD behind a column OF the
sacred edifice to play strange tricks
The sermon was over, the benedic-
ton given. The housekeeper, who had
taken care to put her bright bonnet in
direct range of Mr.. Van Tweedle's eye,
had hurried home to oversee the din
ner. Mr.. Scratched, who had been
gazing at Miss Van Tweedle when he
should have been looking at his prayer
book, went into the dooryard to see
her step into her gig. For some reason
Mr.. Van Tweedle was delayed. The
fact was he had dropped his eye
glasses, and as he could not see with
out them, to find them was on his
knees on the floor of his pew rummag-
ing for them. Nobody saw him. Every
one hurried home.
The sexton locked the door and Miss
Van Tweedle, out of all patience, wait
ed and wondered in her gig. Finally
she espied Mr.. Scratched posed be-
side a column in an attitude of re-
spect and called to him in tone of just
Indignation:
''Mr. Scratcherd! Here, please! My
brother must have gone home without
me. Will you kindly drive me home?"
Poor Scratched could not believe his
own eyes. Drive Miss Van Tweedle!
Sit beside her in that sacred Van
Tweedle gig! Could it be? In his JOY
he forgot that he knew nothing about
driving. He jumped in, seized the reins
and did something with them, he knew
not what. The horse was newly pur-
chased of gentleman at Black berry
vile. He had never been driven to
church before, and it occurred to him
that the eccentric person who was try
ing to cut his mouth open with the bit
wanted him to go as fast as he could
back to Black berryville. Away he flew
as though he were put upon his mettle
to win a race, and vainly did Mr..
Scratched cry: whoa! Whoal
Whoa!''
Nothing could stop him. He flew up
the street, overtaking scattered mem
bers of the congregation. Every body
saw the gig and who sat in it. And so
out upon the high road, the distracted
Scratched urging him on while he de-
sired to stop him.
where are we going?" gasped Miss
Van Tweedle.
II don't know" cried Scratched.
''Whoa! Whoa! Are you fright
ened?"
'Dreadfully," gasped Miss Van Twee-
die; but on they flew, until. after max
ing such time as had never been heard
NAL paused at his old owners gate,
with a jerk that tossed Miss Van Twee-
die into Mr.. Scratchcrd's arms and
brought the watch dog to the gate in
fury.
Nobody was at home. The horse
could go no farther.
Mr.. Scratched left his fainting fair
one on a messy bank, and went in
search of vehicle. There was none to
be hired
The steam cars of that part of the
world were pious and kept Sunday. So
were the stages. At five o'clock Miss
Van Tweedle resolved that she must
sup and take a bed at the hotel, and
accordingly, having thanked Mr..
Scratched for his great bravery and
having assured him that he had saved
h err life, retired and left him.
He also hired little room near the
roof, where he lay awake and dreamed
of the moment when Miss Van Twee-
dies bonnet touched his hair and her
kid glove rested on his arm. At last
he slept. Loud KNOCKS aroused him
from his slum bers, and a cham bermaid
informed him that 1.-The lady was taken
very bad
He rushed downstairs In the parlor
sat Miss Van Tweedle in a fainting
condition. She held in her hand the
morning paper, and pointed to a para
graph headed:
'ELoPEMENT EXTRAORDINARY IN HIGH
LIFE.-Just prior to going to press we received
the following news: The sister of our most
respected citizen, Mr.. Van Tweedle. eloped
yesterday from the church door, with his pri.
vate secretary, Mr. Scratched, in whom he
had placed the most implicit confidence. The
lady has heretofore been much respected, and
is no longer young. They briDed the sexton to
lock Mr.. Van Tweedle up in the church until
they could make their escape"
''Oh! Oh! Ohv' cried Miss Van
Tweedle. ''What shall do?"
'Scorn them!' said Mr.. Scratched.
'Insolent wretches!'
II shall never hold my head up
again. sobbed Miss Van Tweedle.
But before the last ejaculation had
more than passed her lips, Mr.. Scratch
erd seized her hand.
There is one way to silence Them
said he, ''lovely Miss Van Tweedle.
adored you. Be mine. adored one!"
There was balm in this to one who
had been spoken of as mo longer
young"
'How eloquent he ISL thought Miss
Van Tweedle. And what fine eyes he
has! And he has been so noble in hid
ing his admiration so long"
Say Yes charmer! pleaded Mr..
Scratcherd you'll be Mrs Scratch
erd! I'll fght anyone who breathes a
word against you!"
Miss Van Tweedle permitted him to
kiss her hand, and they walked togeth-
er to the minister's house, and prudent
~ hired boy to drive them home aft.
erward.
Meanwhile Mr. Van Tweedle sat
gloomily in his breakfast-room, when
Mrs. Bly, entered. She, too, had been
reading the paper, and seemed to have
been crying over it Yet she looked
very pretty.
ats dreadful of Miss Van Tweedle,
SIR" she said ''I'd never have thought
it of her. And now I've come to bid
you good-by. sir. I've got to go, you
know; it can't be helped"
''Go." cried Mr.. Van Tweedle.