davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Sullivan republican. [volume] (Laporte, Pa.) 1883-1896, 1891-02-13
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

The supreme court--A youths first
wooing.
A good thing to have around the
house-A Afence.-Statesman
sis Mr.. Robinson a single man?"
No; he has twin brother. Life.
A comb may show its teeth, but it
never gets its back up.-Binghamton
Republican.
The favorite plant of the political
worker is the famous itching palm
Chicago Post.
s'I draw the line right here" as the
fisherman said when he got bite
Pitts6urg Chronicle Telegraph.
Customer-"Is the manager in2 l
want to buy some DOORS" Boy-"Yes,
he's in-but he's out of doors. "-Nep
York Herald.
A lawyer defending burglar used as
an argument in favor of insanity the fact
that the burgular left $40 in the safe.-
Dansoiue Breeze.
Age comes to every man, but fate
Is kind to woman fair,
For when she reaches twenty-eight
She stops r1gnJ unen ana ghere.
Cape Cod Item.
Father-"Another bad report from
your teacherl hope next time you will
do better" Son-sThat's right, papa
don't lose your courage. Flieqende
Blaetter.
Patient-"That medicine you gave me
for my cold, doctor, cured me entirely"
Doctor lin surprise) its Well l
believe I'll try it myself. / can't get
rid of mine"
Visitor-'I suppose your daughter is
busily preparing for her wedding"
Mother-"Yes; she is up to her room
now, destroying all her old letters. y
Household Monthly.
The Duke of Norfolk, who was much
addicted to the bottle, asked Foote, the
actor, in what new character he should
30 to masquerade. $50 sober, was
the instant reply Chicago Neacs.
Pm saddest when sing" said;
Twas little Maud said it to.
She sighed and raised her pretty head
And spoke-"Theres others Just like your
-Nep York Herald.
"How does it happen that DR.. World
y performs the marriage ceremony for so
many old maids" "Oh, he always asks
them in an audible tone if they are of
age, and they all like him. ."-Neao York
Herald.
Fashionable Young Lady-"Papa,
what would you do if you found out l
was going to elope" Father-"Why.
I'd stand outside the house and hold the
ladder for your Romeo. ."-New York.
Journal.
s.If you wish in the world to advance,
Your merits you're bound to enhance
You must stir it and stump 1t,
And blow your own trumpet
Or, trust me, you haven't a chance
The newspapers are forever speak
ing of "the blushing BRIDE" Well,
when you reflect upon the kind of hus-
band not few of the brides marry, you
cannot wonder that they should blush.-
Boston Transcript.
s'What kind of physician is DR..
Scalpela" "Splendid! never saw his
equal. His diagnoses are wonderful.
He makes dead sure thing of it every
time" "Does hea Well, guess won't
have him. Boston Transcript.
Salesman Showing samples Of wall
paper to young couple)-s'Here, now, is
pattern with beautiful chocolate back
ground that" Youthful Bride-"Oh,
Herbert; that will just suit mel You
know almost live on chocolate. = CHI
cago Tribune.
"Five years ago." began the stranger
to Wentman, 81 sought that woman to be
my wife. / believed her to be congenial,
light hearted and beautiful. Has our
married life been pleasant! No"
"Why not2" asked Wentman. "Why
not2 Because she declined to marry me,
of course l''-American Grocer.
Sullivan republican. [volume] (Laporte, Pa.) 1883-1896, 1891-02-13
VOL. TX.

1t is said that over thirty eight thou
sand copyrights have been granted to
American authors during the past year.
The amount of real literature put forth
is not stated.
Sullivan republican. [volume] (Laporte, Pa.) 1883-1896, 1891-02-13

Yokohama, in Japan, is $500 miles
from San FrncIsco.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29
Proposed Use of Smokeballs in War.

In the sham fight Mt Portsmouth in
honor Of the Emperor William, an ad-
vancing column was so affected by the
fumes of tho smoke ball which was
used to raise Il cloud Of impenetrable
obscur!ty under which they could ad-
vance, that the men had to keep their
hands to their noses to avoid sutfoca-
ton. 1t is now proposed that the
smokcbul! shall receive further devcl-
opment. 1t has occurred to some
military men that instead Of half suf-
locating their own troops it would be
better to follow the example Of the
Chinese pirates with their stinkpots
and asphyxiate tho enemy. A Vienna
scientist has accordingly invented q
bomb of such power and virulence
that everyone who is within a certain
radius Of it when it explodes is rem.
dered unconscious. Devices such as
these would soon modify the art OF
war. and probably tho next develop
ment will be an anti-asphyXiating
| bomb, whose fumes will neutralize
those of the other. 1t Is said that
many years ago scheme based on the
throwing OF poisonous gases over a
tract of country was put before the
war Office in England for the purpose
OF devastating the country in the face
OF an invading army. but the agency
employed was SO terrible in it's effects
that it was not made public aud wal
consigned to the secret record of thu
| war office.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29
Blasts From tho Rams Horn.

There is never any love for man on
this earth until God gets into his heart.
No man can love anybody or any
thing that he does not know anything
about
The great trouble with the world to-
day Is that SO few people have their
own God.
Nothing on earth makes the devil SO
much trouble as u christian with a
pure heart
The devil never fools way his time
In trying to make a drunkard out OF u
sstingy man.
II head preaching could save the
world the dcvil would have been used
up long ago.
In ono moment n resolution may be
formed that will take all OF life to
carry it out.
The devil don't caro- how much
religion you get II you never do any
thing with 1t.
Preachers and churches who please
everybody are the kind who never
have revivals.
+: 10 be meek in spirit is not only u
inherit the earth. but to own rea
estate in heaven.
Could God confer greater honor
upon us than to be willing to make u,
like Himself?-Ram's Horn.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29
The Battles of the Future.

1t is becoming moro or moro appar-
ent that the battles of the future.
whether on land or sea. will be largely
contests of machines with machines.
The development OF modern weapons
has gone ON at such pace that it
seems not unreasonable to predict that
who fight battles will be. more than
anything else. thorough knowledge
Of mechanism; in short they will be. to
great extent, mechanics and en-
ginecrs. Already the modern naval
vessel has become what may be called
simply lighting machine. all its space
not required for the men and officers
being taken up with intricate and COM
plicatcd machinery for doing things
which in the old days were done by the
men. OF left undonc. Indeed, the
modern war-ship has grown SO rapid
~. that it is said many of the older
officers of the navy are meeting with
considerable difficulty 10 Keeping
abreast OF the improvements. and that
tho younger men. fresh from the study
of science, and with more ambition to
stir them on to further study. are COM
ing rapidly to the front in consequence.
It seems that future naval victories are
to be won not by the side that has the
strongest and bravest men necessarily.
but by the side which has its men best
protected from the machines of the
enemy. and is itself provided with
superior machines. All this. OF cousse.
will inevitably bring more aud more
into prominence tho machinist and
engineer. and it is beginning to be
recognized that some additional effort
must be made to secure the best OF both
ON war vessels. -American Mdchinist.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29
LARGEST FARM IN THE WORLD.
Some Interesting Partic ulars Conce rnins This
lmmeuse Tract.

In the extreme southwest corner OF
Louisiana lies the largest producing
farm in the world, measuring 100
miles north and south aud % miles
east and west 1t is owned aud oper-
ated by n syndicate Of northern capt.
talists. The 1900, 900 acres of the
tract were purchased in 1888, from the
state OF Louisiana and from the United
States government.
At that time it was vast grazing
land for the cattle of the few dealers
OF the eighporhood, over 30, 600 he ad
Of half wild horses and cattle being
thereon Now this Immense tract is
divided into convenient pasture sta
tons or ranches existing every six
miles. The fencing alone cost SO, 600.
The land is best adapted for rice.
sugar corn and cotton. All cultivat
ing, ditching, etc, is done by steam
power. \ tract. say half n milo wide,
is taken and an engine is placed on
each side. The engines are portable,
and operate Il cahic attached to four
Pip"7, anu Nhhtr WIS u'EaIs tihtH u
thirty acres a day arc gone over with
only the labor of three men. Harrow
ing, planting and other cultivation Is
done in a like manner. There is not
u single draft horse on the entire
place.
or course horses are used for the
| hcrders OF cattle, o. which there are
10000 head. The Southern Pacific
railway runs thirty-eiN miles through
the farm. The company have three
steamboats, operating on the waters OF
their estates, of which there 800 miles
navigable. They have also an ice
mill. Spare Moments.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29


printing Scotchman. Robert Chambers,
She explored the Carpathians alone.
''bcstrding mountain pony in all the
glory of skirtless knickerbockers. walk
ing the mountains barefoot and rough.
ing it on RATS an English magazine
says. The correspondent OF the 1.oudon
Daily -ttics describes her address as fol.
lows:
The low. sweet voice; the real and
the simulated na!vetc Zone as good rs
the other; the original thoughts. the
pretty bits of poelico artistic description
of places and peoples. the witty criti.
cisms built upon concrete OF common
sense, The information running. warp and
welt. through the entire fabric-the
paper. in short. from beginning TO end.
gave US one Of the most delightful treats
ever enjoyed at British Association
meeting. 1t was eloquent, clever, re.
tined. womanly. and vigorous"
Altogether Miss Dowie has made for
herself almost as big place in the talk
Of the women Of England as Miss
Fawcett made for herself some months
ago. That bright woman. by the way,
shows that her knowledge extends be-
You'd mathematics iii which she beat the
men of Cambridge. by II sympathetic
| and highly creditable article in the Con.
temporary Reo'e'o on Child Marriage ia
India
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29
Tho Perversc Japanese.

Located rs they are on the Otilel side
Of the earth, what wonder is it that the
Japanese should do things in a fashion
that looks contrariwise to usp At any
rate this is, indeed. the case. and will
.numerate few illustrations OF the
topsy-turvey way in which they do
things in that remote and remarkable
land. The Japanese books begin upon
page which we call the title page they
utilize for the colophon or tinis. Iu
the superscription Of q letter the
Japanese begin with the name OF the
country to which the letter is to be
sent; then follows the city. then the
local address, and, finally. the name of
the receiver. thus: America. Illinois.
Chicago, 1l2 Jones street, Smith. John.
This, after all. makes an easier job
for the Post Office employees - this
descent from the general into the par
| ticular.
In Japan babies are carried not in
the arms but upon the back. Etiquette
compels the removal of tho shoes
rather than the doiling of tho hat.
Boats are stranded with their stcrns.
, instead OF their prows, on the shore.
4, Instead Of saying northeast or south
west. the Japanese say east-north or
! west-south. Wine is always drunk be-
| fore. not after dinner. and sweets are
served before the substantial viands Of
q meal. In all books the foot notes
occur at the top Of the page; keys turn
to the left carpenters plano toward
the body instead Of outward. aud in
cash accounts the figures are written
first and the corresponding item next.
The Japanese mount the horse from
the right side, the harness Ii fastened
in al parts on that side. and tho manc
Is brushed aud made to grow that way.
In his stall the horse Is placed with bis
head outward aud his food Il always
served at the stable door from . tub.
In Japan women fall in lore with
actors. but never man with An actress.
Among Japanese women tho penchant
Il to sew on laces, cuffs. and frills topsy-
turvy and wrong side out CAica9e
.NeUs.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29
WATERS ARE VERY ACUTE.
Traits Which Eaabls Thorn to Siae Up
Customers At . Glance.

II suppose that the average run OF
people think that waiter does not
know anything beyond the knowledge
which leads him to serve the fruit be.
fore the entrec or the tutti frutti in
advance of the demi tassc" said an in.,
tclligent French waiter in downtown
restaurant the other day to N. Y.
Herdid man.
Yet, rs II matter Of fact" he con-
tinued, 1--WE do notice every little
detail about people who seat them
selves at the tables apportioned to us
by the manager of our restaurant. The
reason we do so is because hy this
practice of sizing up our guests we can
generally tell how it is best for us to
go to work in order to get II fee out Of
them or to discover that we are likely
not to get any fec at all.
"Iou see il we come to the latter
conclusion there is no use Of our vast
| ing time on them, rs we can put it to
Il much greater advantage by letting
them wait, while we hurry the orders
OF better paying customers
1--WE are not afraid of any COM
! plants which they make to the head
! waiter. because while we give up free.
lv to him we can never get into any
serious trouble. Besides he would
! only listen to complaints that came
from habitues, and, us they always fee
us we'll, they are always we'll looked
after.
| How can we judge people at y
glance? Well, III tell you, sir. You
see, in the first place people from the
country or those not used to city
restaurants always enter the room with
kind of an uncertain air.
Suppose it is q young man who is
going to buy lunch for his girl. II
he is not used to the business he looks
doubtful and unhappy. He does not
know what to do with his hat and hcsi-
tates in choosinga table. and very like
ly will end by putting his hat on the
floor when he takes his seat, and his
girl will invariably take her place be-
side him instead of on the opposite
side of the table. rs she should.
Then, in studying the menu, he is
apt to look at the prices first. and it is
apparent that all the French names in
the list are so much Greek to him. The
result is that his order is of 4 most in
congruous nature. and would make
any but a well-trained waiter smile in
spite Of himself. There is no money
for the waiter in people like that.
The city man is different. At a
glance he sees which available table
has the best location and instinctivcly
chooses one as far from the kitchen
and as near window rs possible. He
always knows, too, exactly what lie
wants. and will often order without
looking ut the menu ut all.
Still, city men often make me tired
by insisting in talking French to me.
have been in this country twcnt,
years. my wife is an American. and
: speak English perfectly. yet some OF
my customers insist on giving all their
orders in French that sometimes make.
my hair fairly curl. Still. l do m,
best to understand them, and Away.
compliment their French, particularly
il they have n lady with them. In tina
way am always sure of good fee
, though sometimes have to get then
J to point to the place on the menu be
, fore l can make out what dish the3
want"
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29
TAs Country too Fiat for . Railway

A Scotchmau who had been employ
cd nearly all his life in the building OF
railways In the Highlands Of Scotland
came to the United States In his last
years and settled In q new section on
the plains OF the far west Soon after
his arrival project came up in his
new homo for the construction OF q
railroad through the district aud tho
Scotchman was applied to rs q man Of
experience in su,h matters. "Hoot,
mon," said he to the spokesman of the
scheme. I'VE Gamma build q railway
across the kentry" why not. Mr..
Ferguson?" "Why notp' he repeated
with an air OF settling the whole mat
ter. ''why not? And dinna you see
the kentry's as fiat as a fure aud you
have nav place to run your toonnels
through"
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29

It is said that in many French
villages boards are set up bearing tho
following instructions: Hedgehog:
Lives upon mice. snails. and wire-
worms. animals injurious to agricul-
turc. Don't kill Il hedgehog. Toad; helps
agriculture; destroys twenty to thirty
insects hourly. Don't kill a toad. Cock
chatter and its Larvae: Deadly enemies to
farmers. lays seventy to 100 eggs.
Kill the cockchafer. Birds: Each de-
partment of France losses yearly many
million of francs through the Injury
done l,y insects. Don't kill the birds. !"
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29
Mark Twain Convinced.

A story is told that on one occasion
Charles Dudley Warner. who is neigh
Dor and friend to Mark Twain. wanted
him to 60 walking, and Mark. as usual.
refused. Dudley insisted. but to no
purpose.
You ought to do it." he said finally.
''Its according to Scripture"
mo neutrality-suspicious. chest
nuts on me-" replied the willy humor-
list. where's your authority?"
The fifth chapter of Matthew, verse
tie TO ty-first." said Mr.. Warner.
"whlcn reads thus: Aud whoever shall
compel thee to 90 mile. go with him.
Twain"
Mr.. Clemens won't with Mr.. Warner
that time.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29

..Well. ma'am. said the fisherman.
playfully sticking his lead pencil in the
Holsters claw. 1.-THE oyster season 10
here"
I'm sorry" said the landlady. NJ
gretfully.
How soa" he asked. in surprise.
well, I've been servin' them big
clans of yours, stewed. all summer. "she
answered. land whenever ono OF my
boarders struck q clam In the soup .
big as biscuit he'd chew on It till he
was too tired to chew anything ella"
IN. 7, Tribune,
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29

II m. But while the
spell is on lie is in
defa,igablc, hardly
ticking time to eat.
In fact. he forgets to
do so frequently,
and. after taking Il
bowl OF oatmeal and
cream for breakfast.
will paint or write
until warned by the
darkness 10 put aside
his tools. As an
artist ne is self.
taught, and has been
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29

A member of the British South Afri-
can Company reports the discovery of
an ancient ruin in Lundi. Mashona!and.
of which the race there now has no
record. 1t was there when their fore
fathers came to the country. It is II
circular and massive building. with
walls Of wrought stooe. in some places
ten feet thick. Il Is supposed to b =
fort.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29

RoBEEr Burns WILL both al apt pupil
son. and a painstaking
master. He is still very young.
when the Evening Cometh On" is
perhaps his most beautiful poem. At
terward he put his conception Of cven-
ing into new shape-that of . water
color, which pleased the eye Of Gov.
Buckner. and now adorns the walls Of
KentuckYs Executive Mansion
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29
Coed II Not soliA.

IBID the doctor give your husband
solid advice?"
mo. liquid. He advised iim 70
stop dxinking."
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29

Thomas J. Ring. manager OF the St.
Louis business OF the Armour-C uoahy
packing company of Omaha has been
arrested charged with not having 40
counted for q, 900 worth OF beef.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29
A Pig By Mall.

A sucking pig carelessly wrapped il
brown paper with both ends open wac
an article sent through the Rnglieh
postofdce and delivered TO IT, -
dressed.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29
KENTUcKY'S YOUNG POET.
Robert Burns Wilson, Who Il An Artist
AS Well, and Has Fame Before Him.

Frankfort Ky, is the home of man
who has made u name for himself in the
world Of lcttcrs--R ,bert Burns Wilson.
He is poet of no mean ability, and an
artist as we'll.
Mr.. Wilson is man of moods He
cannot work unless the inspiration moves
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29
ONE OF THE GIRLS OF THE DAY.
Misc DOwle, Who Explored the CarpathiAn
Mountains Without Male Help.

This is a picture Of Miss Meme Muriel
Dowie, whose paper on her trip through
the Carpathian Mountains delighted the
wischcads Of the British Association.
before whom it was read. and set all the
slow going ones to exclaim: We'll.
what will women be doing next" Miss
Dowie comes honestly by her literary
ability aud her pluck. for she is the
granddaughter of the famous book.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-01-29

Many laborsrs in Italy average -
ssuN day.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1891-03-13

Mr.. and Mrs. ". +. Weller returned
Sunday from Willston where on Saturday
they attended the celebration OF tue 10Th
anniversary Of the marriage Of Mr.. and
Mrs, Thomas Northrop. \ very pleasant
gathering was present, including the follow
ing representatives, of four generations:
Mr.. Thomas Northrop Mrs. W. L. Weller,
Mrs. Edward W. Parkhil and the latter ;
daughter. The aged couple enjoyed the
day very much. They received numerous
presents OF silver, flowers and other articles.
Mr.. Northrop has sawed and split four
cords Of wood so far this winter, rather
good work for man of % years of age
Him elf and wife keep house alone just as
they did when they started in the path OF
life together, ond they are passing IA bright
and cheerful old age,
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1891-03-13
wliIIAMSTOWN.

Next Sunday evening Rev. Mr.. Smithers OF
Barre will give an address in tho Methodist
church under the auspices of the Epworl h
leaxue-'rhe tndeavor society held their
semi-annual meeting for business on saturday
evening. Willard Walker was elected presi-
dent and Mrs. Ollie karnham vice president.
Mis-, Yates. a returned missionary from China
will give Il temperance address Tor the society
in the Methodist church on Tuesday evening,
March 1.-THE young people of tue Methodist
society will have an enter, ainment in the town
hall. when Mr.. Nanton will continue his lee
ture on sights and scenes in the Tropics. y
Our hotel keeper. Mr.. Durham will soon leave
for Barre and there are as yet no signs of the
new hotel being occupied.-On Wednesday
cert of vocal and instrumental music in the
town hall. On friday the ladies missionary
society of the Methodist church will hold Their
afternoon tea party at Mrs. Guerdon Martins.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1891-03-13
Tie New EXperiment Enrm.

A meeting of the special board appoint
ed to consider the offerings OF zeal estate
for the new Experiment Station farm was
held here Friday. The committee con-
sisted OF Gov c, 5. Page, Mr. q. S Fassett
of Enosburgh and Cassius Peck Of Brook
field. There were also present Gov. Orms-
bee and Hon. Crosby Miller of Pomfret
The party visited the James Shedd farm
farm aud Carlos Baxter farm and other
places and the subject was considered at
length. Owing to the fact that tho ground
was covered with snow, it was decided to
hold another meeting after the snow was
gone.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1891-03-13
PHI SEItlD.

Gertrude Ellis entertained a party of her
young fri, nd- last week Thursday evening"
Ranney, closed last wceE.-tfeOrge Davis and
vie nre soon 10 90 back to the Nose House to
hoard Mambriuo Clay, ir., Il valuable and
NJ hol-. died last week.--A j. Ellis and Ii AIRY
Breed have Lecu drawn for Ietit jurors to the
County Court at Rutland. 1t has been decid
ed To start he cheese factory aga this
spring and William O'Champaugh has been
engaged 10 make the cheese.