St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1891-07-04
Day Of All Days to the Small
Boy With Snub Nose and
Fpeckled Face.
How the Fourth Will Be Spent
in st. Paul and Surround
ing Towns.
Citizens Who Will Crate or
Grow Hilarious Over Noisy
Crackers.
The Patriotic Heart Will Be
Touched by the Celebration
in the Sanity City.

When we were young, wild strawber-
ries weren't sour, green gooseberries
were delicious and the Fourth of July
was the biggest day in the year. Christ
mas couldn't begin to compare with it,
and April FOOLS Day wasn't patching
to it. We used to lie awake weeks be-
fore and think about new ways to make
noises. Then, on the morning of the
very great and very glorious Fourth,
we got up at l o'clock and let loose as
much of pandemOnium as we cOuh. con-
veniently manage to lay hold OF. We
rang the bells and fired rusty old guns
till our shoulders were pounded black
and blue, and shot of firecrackers and
whoOped and yelled, and were powder
burned and, perhaps, had an eye or two
in a sling all that week. Fourth of
July. like almost everything else that
used TO be fun, has about fizzled out.
There are even city authorities who
prohibit the firing of firecrackers within
the city limits!
The only mortal who gets all there is
out of life is the small boy. He is snub-
noSed and freckled, and his teeth are
parted in the middle, with wide. bald
spot where the part ought to be; but he
has fun. He has expended every cent
he could beg, borrow or wheedle for
fireworks. He has traded a jack-knife
with one rusty blade and two dandy
mud hens eggs and piece of old iron
for four sky rockets and a niger
chaser. He has snapped a bunch of
small fire-cTackers and toy pistol for
two cannon crackers and a pinwheel.
He got up early TINS morning and put
on a few clothes. Then ne went out
onto the trout gallery and whistled, and
in half minute seventeen of him were
on the spot. Ma, up stairs, began to
fidget and worry for fear something
would happen-as if anything short of
1000 of brick could faZe the small boy.
Pa began softly and profanely to say
euss words, ana sister yearned to Irvine
her lily fingers in the small boys hair
and relieve him of his scalp.
The small boy Will be with us all day.
He viii slam fire crackers in peoples
faces, and be in eyerybOdy's way. He
will 90 everywhere and let sparks fall
on every bran new muslin dress he sees.
He Will invade the most secluded of
sylvan solitudes, and just when Augustus
gingeringly puts his arm around Maude'S
TWENTY-FIVE waist. a cannon fire cracker
will drop from the skies and disturb
their bliss. The fair young thing from
the country, who wears very blue RIB
bons and very thin muslin frOeks, will
enjoy herself. She will eat peanuts
and chew gum. and giggle with the
masculine Young thing from the same
place, who wears snug fitting trousers
and plasters his hair down. Everybody
will take holiday. There will be four
white frocks on every block. Every
train to every neighboring resort will
be damned. The interurban cars will
be sardine boxes on wheels. There Will
be enough ginger ale and soda water
consumed to flo the national debt.
The streets will be crowded, and every
body will be gay.
There will be noise-plain bangs, long
rumbles, whiZzes and turmoil trimmed
with passementerie. Somebody will be
hurt, and something will burn down. 1t
will be day of racket and confusion,
but it will end finally. Night will shut
softly down over the lovely vally. Here
and there on the hills blazing star will
burst into the heavens. and happy
lovers strOlling arm in arm along the
shady avenues. will breathe delighted
"Ah!" in concert. Rockets will ascend,
and colored fires blaze. Here and there
some patriotic heart will think beyond
the uproar and confusion, back to the
glorious time it celebrates, and the far
| away events it commentaries. Rainier
and fainter will grow the noises, fewer
and fewer the rockets and stars. The
lovers will bid each other lingering
good night; the patriotic heart will take
his patriotic headache to bed; very
tired and grimy, but very happy small
boys will fall asleep; Pa and Ma forget
their troubles and are thankful the day
is over with. Everything is calm and
| quiet, and the street cleaners cart and
broom carry away the remnants of the
most wildly American of all holidays,
the glorious Fourth of July.