The Helena independent. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1875-1943, 1891-07-31
THE SHADOWGRApHER.

THE SHADOWGRAPHER.
The following conversation was overheard
in a popular resort. I've Montana colonies
meet aud shake hands.
"Howdy to-day, c%olonel?"
"Very good, colonel. How are you,
aah?'
"only tolahble. sab. And yoh wife and
family?"
'Tolahble. And yoursp"
"~Tolahble."
Colonel. will you take something's"
"Thank you, sab. I don't mind If / do"
Nj Barkeeper, give us a little of that
old Bourbon county whisky, If you please,
sah."
NV
l saw a souvenir photograph of the Bill
lings l%ynching. 1t pictured a poor wretch,
tied hands and feet, hanging to the CROSS
beam of a telegraph pole. His head was
turned sideways from the body and his face
was distorted by suffering. What a picture
of Montana life for the early-rising North
ern Pacific tourist. What would be his first
impression of a commonwealth rustling day
and night to bring more people within her
borders?
~
Noticed that the Denver Elks enjoyed a
big clam bake the other day. 1t was n
| grand success. Now, then, why do Helena
ties not arrange a summer entertainment
of this sort, for there is no greater fun in
the world than an old-fashioned clam bake
with good fellows? Baked clans, spring
chicken. lobster. green corn, fish and new
potatoes. Do not worry about the CLAIMS,
for they can be brought here from the east
in good condition.
~
John Mcguire thinks he now has the
dead open and shut inch" on the must
clans who occasionally divert themselves by
striking for higher wages. h pastime
has caused some annoyance in years gone
by. When a company appears the orches-
ira is like a dress coat-it must be had or
the entertainment must be sacrificed. Well,
what do you think Mcguire has found? 1t
is a piano that will brilliantly execute any
music, providing an adjustable crank is
turned with proper energy. 1t will play
any air or accompaniment if the music
is set between an ingeniously arranged
system of wires. A Chinaman can
grind out Mendelsohn's concerto de Butte,
part third in A minor and with the same
ease can break the stiffness left by a TRACE
dams s%oliloquy with the melodious strains
Of when McCarthy's on the floor | do ad-
miro him." Mcguire says that no one
would NOW the difference between Joseffy's
execution and the rendition Of the China
man. He expects to have the machine in
his house at Butte and says the people will
have to pay to hear it.. He has been study
thinks he has discovered a method by
which the music of a triple tongued %cornet,
a fine edged violin and a blazette can be
added with only a trife more e~xertion on
the part of the performer. Think of hear
ing Liberati, Remenyi, Josetfv, John Ma
guire and Wing Lung in one orchestra and
that orchestra in Butte.
~
Because one of the electric guy wires near
Hollins avenu was hanging down a small
boy was horribly burned and may be a
cripple for life. This is a short story but it
tells a good deal. Does it not. Mr.. Turn
bull?
III your nOnOr plehSe, Salu Mr. meyers,
sin my limited experience as an attorney,
I have never been instructed in the use of
any personalities, and haye never INDUCED
in them. l shall not on any consideration
be drawn into them now."-Report of Da-
Wis Trial.
Don't be so sure, Mr.. Meyers, about
that. You are in Montana, q land free
from legal conventionalties. Then again,
do have some regard for the poor public.
We are crazy to see Ingersoll, Sanders,
you and the Others get into an old fash
toned justice court scrap before this thing
is finished. Ingersoll wants it, and SO does
Sanders. You, too, must stand in for it.
~
The Shadowgrapher is not a prophe t,nor
the son of a prophet, but he respectfully
submits the prediction of warm times
when the construction of the high school
building is fully investigated. Many good
citizens believe the odor of scandal can
be already detected without extraordinary
effort. The matter will certainly be sifted,
and some one will be very tired before it
is finished. The appointment of Col.
Jockey to fill tho vacancy caused by Mr..
Fdoar,a raaipnation will ha raceiyed with