The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1891-02-19
Put the Plaster on the Wrong Man.

speaking or accldental cures, salo an
old physician to Chicago Post reporter,
"re,ninds me of an incident in the Off
cial career Of Ex-Governor Paddleford,
of Rhode Island. The Governor was q
very corpulent man, and shortly after
his instalment an abscess formed in his
stomach. It wss most painful, and, to
eaae the pain, his physician Instructed
him to travel. The Governor, accompa-
MED by his wife, sst forth, and pretty
much over tie entire country they went.
One night, in sleeping car, the pain
attacked the Governor with extrsordi.
nary force, and, as usual at such times,
his good wife got up to prepare mustard
plaster. So accustomed was the Cover
nor to such applications that, like drinks
for an old topper, they had to be made
extra strong to be made effective. With
the assistance Of the porter, however, she
fixed up large, fat plaster, which, she
calculated, would coma pretty nigh
drawing the very abscess itself out of her
liege lord, then, holding it carefully be-
fore her, trotted back to the berth, and,
parting the curtains, she placed the
poultice on the proper place. AS che
gave it its last pat, she looked up for a
smile of thanks from her husband, when
to her horror she discovered that sho had
stopped at the wrong berth, and opera
ted upon o strange individual, who was
q drummer for liquor house. That she
had not before discovered her mistake,
or that he had not awakened, was due to
his being person of about the same size
as the Governor, and considerably under
the influence of liquor. shuddering with
fright the good lady found her husbands
berth aud stammered forth what she had
done. The Governor, although in great
psin, aud Notwithstanding that the p!sa.
ter contained his entire stock of mustard,
laughed loudly and vowed thatilh he died
he would not stir till the man NTH the
gubernatorial plaster on his common clay
stomach should awake. The time Was
not long, A piercing yell that brought
the conductor and porter to the drum
mer's berth announced its arrival. As
they tore aside the curtains the drummer,
putting his hand to his stomach, felt the
soft plaster. My Godp he screamed, as
visions OF premature decomposition
danced before his eyes, I'm spoilingp
In an agouy of mind be tore the plaster,
which he supposed to be layer of de-
caying flesh, from him, and With q
scream Of despair flung it away. 1t
struck tho porter in the face, and that
individual, fancying that his brains had
been knocked out, fed.
"IYhaL's the matter with you2" the
conductor inquired Of the drummer.
"sN1atter?' echoed that parsonage With
misery in his face. Matter? Great
heavens, eau you ask7 Look there he
said, pointing to his stomach. I am
rotting away; and 10 think tina! it was
my own wLiskey that didit!'
"The conductor looked at the spot in.
dicated, but saw nothing unnatural. lie
50 told the drummer, who cautiously
placed his hand on his stomach. Lis
lightning change Of connterance told tho
relief he felt. must have had night.
mare he said. The conductor, consid-
erabls mystiGed, Withdrew aud obtained
an explanation from the Governor, who,
having overhead the drummer, was just
recovering from paroxiam of laughter
which had broken the abscess. It's
breaking was what had been sought, and
in few hours the Governor was entirely
cured.