Connecticut western news., 1891-12-31
HUM0ROUS.,STORIES.

Hut When He Found the Man Out He
 Wilted.
 A traveller for New York dry goods house was in the smoking car of train on an Ohio railroad when horny hand ed young fellow came in for a smoke and sat down beside him. The young man felt and looked happy, and pretty soon he remarked:
 ''I heard some one saying you was from New York"
 'Yes."
 Drummer, ain't you?"
 "Yes."
 "Bin around good deal, 'spose?"
 "Wen, I've been travelling for fifteen years"
 s'Shool You must have seen 8 heap. Say, I've got sort of favor to ask of you" "Well?" "Im engaged to gal in the next car. Pm goin with her down to Medina. She's the all firedest purtiest gal in four counties, and I know she loves me, but "But what" "You know feller is allus sort O un. easy about his gal till he marries her. She purtends that she wouldn't even look at the president of the United States if he was single man, but 1 dunno. You can't be sure of these women." No, you can't" May be purtendin to love you like a house afre, and yet be plannin to drop you for the first better looking feller who comes along. She's in the next car and I'd kinder like to try her. I'm purity sure she's all right, but I'd like to know jest how she'd act if you went in and sat down beside her. I know it's askin a big favor of you, butt
 ''Oh, I'm perfectly willing to accom- 1nodate you," interrupted the traveller, ''but you must promise to abide the con- sequences" 'Howp' 'Why, if she seems to take to me you mustn't get mad and raise a row. I am only trying to accommodate you, you know" Dye think she'll take to your "Why, can't say. She's sitting in a seat alone. I'll take my grip and walk 1 into the car and sit right down beside her." "Yes." "Then I'll speak about the weather the scenery-ask where she is going, and | so on, and the chances are that in about ten minutes we'll be talking away like l two old friends" ''Humph! It took me three months | afore dared ask if her ma was welll' "Then I'll gradually lead up to the l subject of my being 8 widower," con- tinued the traveller. "Tll remark how lonely I am, and how I'm thinking of marrying again, and how my second wife l will have sealskin sack, diamond ear rings and a horse and carriage. If you come in and find me holding her hand you mustn't fly mad and pitch into me" :" "Goin to talk sealskin sack to her, ehr' "Yes." "And diamond earrings?' "Yes."
 "And tell her she can have regular l Brussels carpet, stuffed chairs and a
 hired galr' 1 Certainly" l "You wait minit!"
 He got up and left the car. Just then the whistle blew for station and the train soon stopped The traveller looked out of the window and saw the young man and his girl getting off with as much alacrity as if there had been col ision expected. He put out his head | and called: "This isn't Medina; what are you get.
 ting off here fory' l ''I know it hain't Medina" l" replied the
 young man as he came forward a few
 steps, "but we will stop off here and takt
 the next train."
 ''But thought you wanted me to dc
 you favor"
 'I do. You jest keep right on tha
 train and git out of the state of Ohio a!
 soon as ever you can, and if ever ketcl
 you within fifty miles of my house aftel
 I'm married I'll thump you all over tho
 county."-M. Quad in New York Even
 ing World.