davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

Doctors Advice.
A clever writer, the possessor, In
all probability, of bald head, has
proved that badness is a product
and sign OF culture. III badness Is a
sign OF culture, something devoutly
to be wished, we shall perform a
public service In showing how this
condition can be quickly reached.
Non-scientitic people will possibly
study our advice In order to do the
opposite, and thus keep their hair as
long as possible.
I'VE lose, In the course of time"
said Voltaire, "our teeth, our hair,
and our ideas" That may be true as
far as the teeth and ideas are con-
cerned, bat we cannot always depend
upon losing our hair.
Persons who long for the proofs OF
culture must resort at once to meth
oda of art. The first good rule Is To
keep the head warm. In summer, il
you wish to become bald, do not wear
straw hat. On the contrary, let
your headgear be a felt or cloth hat.
derby or a stovepipe. In winter
always wear fur cap. While in the
house, at all times of the year, do not
fail TO wear fez or an oil cap.
Women whose light hats do not
wear of the hair rapidly enough may
accomplish that end by using heavy
switches of false hair. A roll of
fale hair will work even more rapidly
than fur cap, as the hairs will fall
out by the hundreds when the roll Is
heavy enough. The beloved night
cap, so dear to our grandmothers, is
to be highly recommended also. The
helmet. of the officer and policeman il
also splendid invention. What Is
the effect Of these head coverings?
They make the head perspire. Moist
ure is the deadly enemy Of hair. On
the temples and the back Of the head
near the neck, usually untouched by
the has and caps, it Is seldom thai
one fees badness. A bald ring often
ma.ks the position Of the hat or cap.
Cur young handles who curry their
heads every morning with two
brushes, and in the course of the day
comb their hair whenever they see a
mirror, are on the right path to bald
ness. That is also true of women
who allow their hair to be combed by
Impractical servants.
The savant Gazenave found the
heaviest and most beautiful hair ON
the heads which had never been
touched by scissors. People who
wish to become bald should have
their hair cut as often as possible. 1t
is encouraging to notice that this
practice is increasing. Children
have their hair cut often in the alb
surd belief that the hair will become
thicker. Again, go as often as pos
sible to the BARRIERS. In the brushes
and combs of the barber shop, used
indiscriminately upon the heads Of
all kinds Of customers, micro-organ-
isms destructive to the hair flourish
In great quantities.
The investigations Of Lossar, the
dermatologist, have proved beyond a
doubt that these parasites spread dis
eases. The dandruff from the heads
Of persons whose hair is disappearing
would produce bald spots on the
backs Of rabbits or mice. AS long rs
BARRIERS are not compelled to disinfect
JneIr brushes and combs there will be
victims ready to purchase, hair re-
structive to the hair. Cesar and
Louis XIV. both owed their famous
bald pates to immoral living. DIR.
Alex. Winckler. in Illustrite Welt.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26
BY many rushing river,
Through many u palmy plain,
They call us TO deliver
The land f,Ox,, a.rnrsa chafn

WHEN the social geologist Of the
future lays bare the stratum in which
we live to-day, and examines it, he
will doubtless name it "The Age Of
Bill Boards" He will find layer after
layer of bill boards, thousands upon
thousands Of feet of advertising, and
very little else; for that is the great
tendency OF to-day-the tendency to
advertise. Not in commercial way
particularly, for the legitimate dis
play advertisement of the regular
merchant is the most modest of them
all. But take up any paper you may
OrsOO'SO, any nIaBoArrIo you may nnu OF
book you can name, and cast out all
that is simply an advertisement of
some man or other and how much re-
mains? The magazines and books
are worse in this regard than the
newspapers, Pick up your favorite
magazine; look at the title page.
What do you find? Names, names,
names. Names Of men and women
who are trying to get notoriety. Turn
over the pages. What do you read?
Is it literature? Is the diction clear
and pleasing2 Is the thought par
ticularly deep? Is-the thought of
any consequence save in connection
with the man whose name is under
it? Isn't it merely an opinion? An
opinion of whom? OF an advertiser
to be sure, and nothing else. Look
II you did not know of the author,
would you read it? II he were not
alive to run his advertising bureau
would his book find readers? What
great preachers sermons would sell
under an unknown name, any more
than would Jimson's soap under like
circumstances? What great doctors
remedies would find favor if they came
from more learned but less notorious
physician? Half the lawyers who
win cases would lose them If their
names were changed. In former days
the Great Unknown" was mascot;
to-day he is Jonah. And this only
shows the extent to which advertis-
ing has become part OF our exls-
tence. But there is this good fortune
in it all. There is no divine right To
advertising. 1t is democratic in its
favors, and he who possesses the Sc
cret of the art Of advertising has his
hand upon the door which leads to
success; but woe is he If he try To
! open when he is unworthy; for If the
world Vorships her heroes-sooner OF
later she numerically crucifies her
| auacks.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26
Mystery Of a Lost Diamond.

Nearly two years ago., says the San
Francisco Bulletin, quite a stir was
made at Mills College, California, about
the loss Of valuable diamond pin be-
longing TO Miss Maud Sparks of San
Reno. Servants and pupils were sus-
pected and much notoriety was given
to the case in the papers. Miss Sparks
was removed from the school in conse-
quence of the supposed theft. Lately,
when one of her old gowns was being
ripped, the pin was found in the drapery
of the garment, where it had been safely
concealed all the time"
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26
An Ancient Arab University.

The old Arab university of FL Azhar,
which was founded in the tenth century,
and has constantly opposed an infexible
front to the advance OF European ideas,
is to-day the most important Mohamme-
dan college in the world. Although it
has no longer the 10000 students who
crowded its courts in the thirteenth and
fourteenth centuries, there is still an Mt
tendance of from seven to ten--some say
twelve-thousand and its pupils are sent
out to every Mohammedan country from
the Soudas to Indio. Il Atlanta Coasii-
tuition.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

THIS is hopeful year with France.
Its harvest has been good, its people
have confidence in the Government,
there is no hostility between employ
ers and employees, its financial credit
was never better, Boulangism sleeps
with Boulanger, and the Government
ioes not fear war from any foreign
power. Denmark has taken its stand
with Russia. 1t stands guard on the
Baltic and over the Gulf of Finland.
Belgium takes pains, as 1t has not
done for many years until now, to
claim its independence of Germany,
and its determination In the event OF
a rupture between France and Ger
many to maintain its neutrality.
Even the usually modest and retiring
M. Freycinet, the chief OF the min
Astry and Minister of War, says: Il
shall have something to say myself
about warv-by which he means
about keeping the peace. At the late
fetes OF Marseilles the Bohrgmestrc
Of Brussels said: Permit me TO speak
as a friend to friends: that Is to say,
with that frankness which friendship
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

In the midst of political campaign
upon which depends his last chance
of returning to power Mr.. Gladstone
has found time to write a theological
paper for an English review. The
grand old man is indomitable. When
Charon finally takes him across the
last ferry he will, no doubt, jot down
a few notes with view to an article
upon archaic methods of navigating
the river Styx.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

A LOT of exquisitely told bits of
Russian folk lore have been restored
to present day people by Tolstoi, the
eccentric. They may serve purpose
and a good one, perhaps, in showing
to us, who are acquainted with tele-
phones, steam engines and things,
that centuries ago property rights and
the sin of buying and selling were as
freely made use OF by Russian story
tellers and fable builders as they are
at present by men in the same bust
ness. On the other hand, when we
consider that such conditions were
discussed and presented by writers
who thought centuries ago and that
those conditions are no nearer reali-
Eation now then they were then, the
idea has tendency toward producing
fatigue.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

THE prospects for the speedy open
ing Of the greater part of the Indian
lands in the Oklahoma country are
good. The Government commission
ers are now on the ground negotiating
with the TOnkawas, and there is
every reason to believe that salts
factory settlement will be reached in
a short time. Their reservation en-
braces about 10000 acres, of which
SO, 200 will be opened for homestead
ers. The commissioners will next
negotiate with the Poncas, Otoes and
Pawnees, and some time in Novem-
Der they expect to go to Tahlequah to
resume negotiations for the Cherokee
outlet.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

authorizes II has panied us to see
1t reported In your press that there
was a secret treaty between King
Leopold and Germany The truth is
that Is a pure invention. am
authorized to say no such treaty ever
existed. Our people love France, but
we shall never renounce that rule OF
neutrality which is the sure guaran-
tee OF the independence of our coun-
try"
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26
pome.tIc Fellclty Must De EARNED.

Young people sometimes fancy that
they can get married happiness
merely by going through the marriage
ceremony. Domestic felicity, how
ever, like.sverything else worth hav-
ing, must be worked for--must be
earned by patient. endurance, self
restraint and loving consideration for
the tastes and even for the faults of
him or her with whom life is to be
lived.
aNo man e'er gained happy life By chance
or yawned IL into being with w!sh.'
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

Two REPUTABLE citizens OF Michi-
gan recently discovered a hairy wild
man seven feet tall, who leaped
twenty-threc feet at a bound. These
gentlemen should by all means take the
course in mythology at the Kelley In
etitute
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

A YOUNG lady of Memphis, Tenn,
wrote an essay on 1.-The Model Hus-
band" This brought her a prize of
$40 and better-half In the shape OF
a rich and handsome young banker, OF
Minneapolis. The public may now
look for more essays on the same sub
ject.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

The number of emigrants from the
United Kingdom to America during
he last eight months was 100, O51, an.
Increase Of 5000 over the same period,
Il 1890. or these 4l,57S were from
Ireland, an increase OF 1,437.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26
A scene of Majestic Grandeur.

Sutherland Falls, at the head OF
Arthur Valley, New Zealand, would
be the highest waterfall in the world
If the water descended in a cOntin-
lous stream. From height of 1904
feet the water drops distance of S15
feet into an enormous caldrOn.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

needs an expanse OF brim, white on the
other hand, the pert, pretty face will
often bear shape that flares boldly up
and shows her just as she is A short
figure Of the dumpy build should beware
Of wide brimmed felts- They loek like
extlnguIshers on haIf-burned down
candles.
My second illustration pictures a
dashIng bit OF headgear In felt, trimmed
very high with bows Of velvet ribbon.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

Thence it shoots over the edge of the
caldron and takes another drop Of ISL,
feet. 1t is again broken by ledge
Of rock and takes final plunge OF
1913 feet. The noise Of the water as
1t falls from ledge to ledge is deafen-
ing and the entire surroundings are
Of the most majestic grandeur.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

III seems anomalous that Shakers
should be religiously ayerse to the
dice box.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

MARIE WILT; the once noted soprano,
who committed suicide in Vienna last
September, met her death by jumping
from fourth-story window.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

An eommnpic.tions for tia papsr should BE- sos4n
.-l1 ~ IL name Of TIE .uLhos, nst nses4.azly 81
Fe1nc@lcn. but evidences Of good faith on the pan
- us u1a,~s Wsiis only enc sds Of the paper. Ne
-1eeeAxg careful. IN diving and data hlvs
- lstters and asurss plain and distinct
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26
THE JoKER'S BUDGET.
TESTS AND YARNS BY FUNNY MEN
OF THE PRESS.
Does Advertising Pay--Cereals and
Serials-The Old Story--A Bad Fit
Cake and Broad Language, Etc.,
Etc.
DOES ADVERTISING pAyf

1st Jeweer--I have had proven to mo
that advertising brings results.
End Jeweler was the case?
LIST Jeweler "Wednesday evening l
advertised for Waterman, and during
the night my store was burglarized.-
jewelers. Circular.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26


of that good wife who refused to allow
her husband to go on journey shabbily
dressed lest In the event OF railway
accident the fact might be drawn to the
attention OF the public. Commencing as
1t did, with an instructive fondness of
personal adornment- this question OF
dress, like tho attire of the ce ebrated man
of fashion above mentioned, has grown
to such importance that 1t now monop-
olizes a good half of the worlds atten-
tion. Take from our poems, our novels
and cur newspapers the descriptions of
the raiment worn by the characters and
people therein mentioned, and S.u would
leave a tremendous gap. But the time
which a woman spends over dress Is not
lost by any means, though thu contrary
is very apt to be the popular opinion A
celebrated physician, an authority on
nervous diseases, has expressed the
opinion thai The mental occupation re-
sulting from love OF dress is a most
valuable preventive of many forms of
hysteria. 1t is better to talk chitfUns
than to NOPE or discuss unwholesome
topics. That being the case, even II you
don't care to order such q costume for
yourself, you will have no objection to
examine and discuss the handsome cos
tune pictured in my initial illustration
"a white silk, striped with pale blue.
with a white crepe de chine plastron.
With this costume is worn very stylish
bonnet of white lace, embroidered with
large pearls. which form kind of dia-
dem in conjunction with bows Of black
velvet and black feathers
Speaking of becoming headgear, says
our New York CORE spondent, | should
remind you that this Is par excellence
the season OF felts, when the new styles
come so fresh and beautiful from the
hands OF the makers. II you will dis
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

A RAILROAD in the Argentine Repub.
lie has one stretch OF 21i miles without
q curve CT bridge.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26
A CASE IN POINT.

"Shakespere says, Some men are
born great, some achieve greatness and
some have greatness thrust upon them.
Do you think case ever happens where
a man has greatness thrust upon him f"
Certainly. Take great grandfather
for instance. - New York Press.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26
KsowLFDoE rs rowrn.

Doctor notice marked increase
In your Appetizer
Pafient-Yes.
Doctor - Sleep longer and moro
heavily than usual?
Patient-Yes.
Doctor-Feel very fatigued after
much exercise?
Patient--Yes.
Doctor Very grave case. But
the researches of science, sir, enable US
TO cope with your malady, and think l
can pull you through. Il Harper's Bazar.
TIRED OF 1T.
Mamma (raising the slipper)-Willie,
my son
Willie across the maternal knee)-
Spank away, mamma, but don't give me
that old gag about its hurtin' you worse'n
it hurts me.-lChicago Tribune.
SHUTTING HIM UP.
Spectator lin the dime museum)-Call
that knowing dog? I've got dog at
home knows more than him.
Dog Exhibitor-Then he is better
trained than you are, my friend.
| GOT INTO THE WRONG SHOP.
| When woman is hungry, but does
not know just what she would like to eat,
she always asks for cup of tea and
piece of lemon pie. This is true not
withstanding the humorists tell of the
"best girls" enormous appetite.
With young men il is different. One
of them entered Boston store the other
day and asked for plate of soup.
Soup" inquired a young woman be-
hind counter.
ayes. Isn't this restaurant"
"Why, no, indecdr Indignantly.
~ saw cream advertised in the win
dow, didn't II"
ayes, but that's for the hair. This is
hair store"
And the young man fed disconsolate.
Il Boston Globe.
THE PENALTY OF CULTURE.
Illiterate Vendor-Appricots! Appri-
cots! Three for 10 cents!
Miss Minerva Absolute, from Boston
Oh, most wretched man! wanted some
apricots so much; but your atrocious
INSTRUMENTATION has made it quite i'm
possible for me to relish them.-[ Boston
Courier.
A MODEST GIRL.
She is truly modest miss,
| Although charming little elf
So modest she won't give kiss;
Her lover has to help himself.
New York Press.
| CASE IN POyNT
"Shakespere says, Some men are
born great, some achieve greatness and
some have greatness thrust upon them.
DO you think case ever happens where
a man has greatness thrust upon him ?"
Certainly. Take great grandfather
for instance. IN York Press.
AFTER HER RETURN.
He-And you did not forget that we
were engaged, did you, Maud, while you
were away?
She--No, George; couldn't. Mamma
kept reminding me of it all the time
Bazaar.
KNEW HIS BUSINESS.
Mr.. Laman-Why do you always
question patients so closely about what
they eat? Does the information you get
help you to diagnose their cases
Doctor Emde-Uh, no. But by so
d9ing AZ sm rffgg qsB I to 5Uesh wgRkat fees ts
can probably get out of them.-[Puck.
/ EASILY OVERCOME.
Mamma-There is something about
Mr.. De Riches manner of walking that
greatly dislike.
Grace-That may be, but you should
remember, dear, that he can always
afford to ride.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26
WOMAN AND HER DRESS
SOME NEW STYLES THAT Arc
ATTRACTIVE.

Mental Occupation Resulting from n Love
OF Dress Is a Preventive OF Hysteria-
Becoming Headgear-The Long Cloak
Appears.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

THERE are ugly reports that come
from China TO the effect that the peo-
pie of that country are up in arms
against the Christian missionaries
and residents sojourning there. The
conduct of the mob is such as to ex-
cite the resentment OF every civilized
and Chrlstianized country on the face
OF the globe. 1t is something that
will not be tolerated. Unless 1t is
stopped and restitution made gun
boats as thick as mosquitoes will be
getting around Chinese ports and
vengeance swift and terrible will be
the result. All this conceded. 1t
might be well here to pause and re-
feet on the causes which produced
the outbreak to the end that recur-
renee Of the ugly scenes may be
avoided. AS far as this country is
concerned we are at a disadvantage.
We have solemnly excluded the Chi
nese, and with an inhospitality quite
unparalleled and strangely atyariance
with our Fourth Of July claim to be
the refuge Of the oppressed of all
countries" We have treated the Ce-
lcstials rather roughly in many in
stances, not always stopping short of
wholesale slaughter. Then we are
sending missionaries to convert the
so-called heathen--a piece of impu-
dence on our part unexampled-while
the heather within our borders can
see that our charity is long-ranged
and blind TO the wants of the needy
at home. We go forth to save souls
and with magnificent assumption
claim that
By many n rushing river,
Through many n palmy plain,
They call us TO deliver
The land from errors chain.
While at the same time there are
millions undelivered from errors
chain in our own country. With so
many conflicting creeds, all entitled
to the most profound respect, and
with the teachings of the Savior in
terpreted in so many ways, it would
be more seemly for our missionaries
to remain at home until their differ
ences were settled, and let the Chi
nese heather take care of themselves.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26
Mhat 70 Mear N MInter.

GEL EBR A TIE ID
dandy, whose attire
furnished the court
OF England with
moro subjects OF
conversation tn a n
did the war which
she was at that time
waging, once enun-
ciated the astound-
ing doctrine that IL
was a mans duty
to dress we'll even IL
he ran In debt for IL.
While such a doc.
trine m ust b Q
strongly condemned
from a moral stand
point, yet as a bit
of popular hi'oso.
ply it goes to show
how strongly In
trenchcd the human
mind is In that love
OF praise and COM
mendation at the
hands of our fel 'ow-
beings. The same
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26
CEREALS AND SERIALS.

Little Helen had always heard tho oat-
meal and rolled-wheat which were put
upon the table for breakfast spoken of
as cereals. So in her busy little brain
queer mistake once arose.
Ono day she heard her elders talking
over the latest magazine story.
''it's very good serial" said papa, ga
very good serial, indeed"
"Thcn, papa" said Helen, approx
ingly, II should think you would like it.
You're so fond of EN- for breakfast"
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26
THE PENALTY OF CULTURE.

Illiterate Vendor-Appricots! Appri-
cots! Three for 10 cents
Miss Minerva Absolute, from Boston
Oh, most wretched mani wanted some
apricots so much; but your atrocious
mispronunciation has mado it quite i'm
possible for me to relish them.-L Boston
Courier.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26

She is truly modest miss,
Although charming little elf
So modest she won't give kiss;
Her lover has to help himself.
II New York Press.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26
AFTER HER RETURN.

He-And you did not forget that we
were engaged, did you, Maud, while you
were away?
She--No, George; l couldn't. Mamma
kept reminding me of it all the time
Bazaar.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1891-11-26
EASILY OVERCOME.

Mamma-There is something about
Mr.. De Riches manner of walking that l
greatly dislike.
Grace-That may be, but you should
remember, dear, that he can always
afford to ride.
The Portland daily press., 1891-11-16

The total eclipse of the moon came of
according to advertisement promptly last
evening. The weather was simply perfect.
Not a cloud obscured the broad expanse Of
the heavens aud. In the keen. crisp atmos-
phere, the stars glistened like diamonds.
Many people went on to the promenades
for view Of the phenomenon. Others
went on to the roofs OF their houses and
brought into service spy-glasses and opera
glasses. At first, little nick seemed to
have been knocked out of the .outer edge
OF the moon, and this nick gradually
broadened until, at the period Of totality.
the orb had dull red appearance, some
thing like an electric light when the car
bon fails to fall into place. Gradually Lu.
ma resumed her brilllancy, and by 10 O'Clock
was sailing serenely and majestically
through the skies.
The moon entered the penumbra at 81
o'clock; the shadow at 5.35; total eclipse
began at 81; middle Of eclipse 7.19: tota
eclipse ended 81; moon left shadow 9.3
and left penumbra 10.2. Eighteen year.
from now, or In 1909, the curtain will rinl
up on "the same thing over again."