Fort Worth gazette. [volume] (Fort Worth, Tex.) 1891-1898, 1891-11-30


will not be so great as it has been hereto
fore. 1t is in the nature of epidemics to
gradually exhaust the material upon which
they feed. Then antiseptic surgery is max
ing such progress that there will not be the
same opportunity for diseases to spread as
there have been. 1t is very difficult to give
ANYTHING like a general cure. l do not
know really that the old advice of keeping
the head cool and the feet warm does not
apply with as much force in this as it does
in everything else"
A number of gentlemen stood at the
counter of one of the leading hotels few
nights since scanning the signatures OF the
guests. They were q learned body of gen.
tlemen, evidently, in the matter of dissect-
ing characters by means of caligraphy.
Its wine for the crowd" said one OF the
number that that signature, - pointing to
certain name, 'belongs to an affable gentle
man and banker" The bet was taken and
now the difficulty arose, how was the pro-
fession of the gentleman to be ascertalned.
Every one agreed that it must be aScer-
tanned, but all seemed as helpless as to the
manner in which an investigation should be
made as the meeting of mice which made up
its mind it was desirable to bell the cat.
One young man whose modeSty was only
exceeded by his love of the excitement
which bet of VINE for the crowd created
the gentleman, by whom he was politely
received. Then he asked if the gentleman
was not banker. No, the gentleman atfa-
bly, replied, he was not a banker, and the
young man explained that he thought he
was banker from his signature. After
the conversation the guest returned to his
seat and the modest young man to his
friends, who joined him in the wine and in
the hearty laugh which the first attempt at
deciphering character evoked.
-.
There are two ways of doing everything.
This fact was very forcibly impressed upon
the mind of The hummer one evening dur
ing the past week. Two gentlemen stand
ing on the corner of Fourth and Main
streets noticed delicate, almost fragile
looking, lady come from the direction of
Houston street. She was carrying baby
and leading a child about four years of age.
1t was evident that she was fatigued, that
her slender arms could scarcely bear the
burden they held, while the little fellow
cinging to her skirts was fretful and Sc
tired that his little legs could scarcely tod
die. Both gentlemen noted the weary wo-
man as she passed them, and heard her re-
mark that they had ''only six more blocks"
to walk.
Il would help that woman if l dared"
said one of the gentlemen, but II | should
speak to her she would resent it, and would
tried that kind of thing once and the
woman called an officer and | narrowly es-
capped arrest"
well, am going to help her, and / don't
think I'll be arrested" said his friend.
Walking up to the tired little woman the
gentleman said in u low tone: "You are
about to drop that baby; 1t is too heavy for
for reply he lifted the child out of her
arms, and she was so glad to be relieved of
the load that she forgot to get frightened.
As the little woman and her benefactor-
for such he really was-diSappeared down
the street, the other gentleman, turning TO
The hummer, said: 'lf had done that
she would have screamed and there would
have been a sensational street scene" He
was probably right.
s'It is an old umbrella, sir; it is weak in
the limbs and stiff in the joints like a rheu-
matte. but yet it is highly respectable UNI
brella and one that has served me faith
fully for years" SO spoke an exquisite
gentleman at the Plckwick, and he spoke
with an affection which there was no at
tempt to conceal. do you know" he con-
tinued, there is something wonderfully
companionable about an old umbrellas l
have a strong regard for everything that is
old-old pipes, old cigars, an old friend, old
wine-especially the last named, on suit
ties. Therefore ! like an old umbrella, and
moreover, 1t is quite companion, as have
said. l do not think there are many men
who can boast OF the same care as ! have
shown for this umbrella, and that is the
reason why it has lasted me 50 long. There
are couple of points with regard to the
care of an umbrella with which / would
wish to supply the public, for am crank
on the subject. One is in connection with
the rolling of it up. To do this SO as not to
injure the ribs and joints, firmly grasp the
points below the cloth with your right hand
while you glide downward with your LETT
till the folds are nicely laid. The other is
when the umbrella is soaked with wet, set
1t with the handle resting on the floor and
let the water run off the ends of the ribs.
If you set it with the ferule down the water
will rust the hinges at the crest" The
audience to whom the remarks were ad-
dressed agreed that the advice was timely.
~
A gentleman with a jaded and detected
look was pacing the lobby Of an uptown
hotel few evenings since in deep study.
His occasional signs attracted the attention
Of friend, who inqhired what the cause of
his unusual gloom might be- II am unfor-
tunate, sir, very,' replied the gentleman.
Il think there should be a law against
voices which are sufficient to terrify a
neighborhood and the singing of songs
which are enough to drive the average man
insane. heard three voices to-day, each
of which grated on my shattered nerves.
The first was like the humming of hand
saw, the next was like the preliminary tun-
ing of a long-disused bag-pipe and the third
was like the dying sound of a fog-horn of
an ocean steamer. Then as l left my house
yesterday the first thing which greeted my
ears was the refrain, Comrades, Comrades
l ran into cafe to get rid of the effect, and :
ordered bottle of claret. .Caret?' said
the waiter, and then he began to whistle,
Comrades, Comrades Tipping him a
quarter l asked him not to whistle, explain
ing that was suffering from a headache.
He obeyed and gave the order for soup.
Soup ready said the cook, and then be be-
gan to hum in a soft accent, sufficiently
loud for me to hear, Comrades, Comrades
BY night my usual good spirits had re-
turned and 1 went home, forgetting my
troubles of the early portion of the day,
when to my horror ] heard the young man
in the next room singing in most musical
voice, Comrades, comrades, ever since we
were boys to banjo accompaniment. The
horrors of the early hours returned. |
have not slept since Marching Through
Georgia. had much to do with the shorten
ing of Sherman's days. am afraid Com
rades, Comrades will have much to do |
with shortening mine.n
A neat little story in connection with |
matrimonial engagement that is just now
agitating society, was heard by The Bum |
mer. The seal of confidence under which |
it was related prohibits the use of the |
names of the four persons who figure in the |
story hut thew ara all pl.Ominent in Soeiatv