Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-09-12
NJ. ouAp,s SUNDAY OUTING.
He and Med. Go On an Excursion OF the
ssGen lie Lambs"

/ NOrLl river, on Ouho1J, tOON-o
boat which might be going TO camp
meeting somewhere, when young man
approached us and introduced himself
as one of the Gentle Lambs. He ex-
plained that he was consistent member
of the Society of Gentle Lambs, which
was going to take a ride on a steamboat
TO raise money to buy Sunday school
books for little wee Lambs who might
otherwise grow up in vice and ignor-
ance. This Gentle Lamb said the oo-
iect was worthy one, and should re-
ceive the support of every good man. :
spoke 10 Med. about it, and he said II
would.Drobably be just as good as camp
meeting, with a good deal more scenery
thrown in, and so we gave the Gentle
Lamb q dollar, and went aboard the
steamer, which was waiting to carry the
sheep up the Hudson.
We had scarcely got aboard when l
noticed two men rolling kegs OF beer up
the gangulank. 1t looked bithilariouS
TO me, and l got uneasy and spoke TO
Med. about It. He said he couldn't see
anything out Of the way In that. LAMBS
got thirsty as well as other folks, and
| il the beer could be turned into Sun
/ day-school books the Lamblets would
/ be so much ahead. | wanted to reason
the thing, but Med. said that it didn't
look just right for man to come mere
from the wild-eyed West and begin to
find fault with New York institutions
before he had got the prairie soil OIL his
heels. l let the beer go after that.
! That IS, let it come aboard.
Pretty soon young man with seri-
Gus cast OF countenance came along
with some badges on which the name OF
"Gentle Lamb" was printed. He want
ed to know why in devilled clans, great
cats, canned Holsters and the province
| of Halifax we didn't have badges on,
and in appreciation OF his style OF ora
tory and to add to the library fund, we
| bought couple and pinned them on.
| inst then l noticed that some more
beer was being rolled up the gang
| plank. 1 spoke to Med. about IL and
| he said some camp-meeting stuff had
probably got mixed up with ours.
Pretty soon procession of Gentle
Lambs came down to the boat. There
were four policemen behind the column
to see that no one got lost. / thought
there was little too much hilarity for
Sunday, but perhaps l was prejudiced.
Two Gentle Lambs set out to whale
each other on the wharf and vera led
away by the police, while the process
sion marched up the gang-plank sing
ing a song which couldn't remember
to have ever heard at a campmeeting.
Then they rolled some more beer up
the gangplank, and I called Mods at
tentlon to it, He said it must be an
other mix of freight and that we were
getting all the beer while the other boat
was getting all the baled hay. Pretty
soon some more Gentle Lambs came
down in procession. They didn't all get
aboard, however. Two of them were
tired ont and lay down on the wharf,
while the police walked two others away
in the most brotherly manner.
The boat was now ready to go. 1t
took on six more kegs of beer and
steamed away. We were only quarter
of a mile from the dock when wagon
came down with some more kegs Of
something. l think it was water. If 1t
had been beer the boat would
have gone back. We were
only well under way when /
was panied to observe the signs Of levi
ty on every hand. Also signs of beer
on tap. A man who had never been in
troduced to me in his life came up and
hit my hat and smashed it down over
my ears and called me old man and
grabbed my handkerchief and walked
off with it. 1t didn't seem right. l
spoke to Med. about it, and he replied
that it was probably according to some
bylaw of the Gentle Lamb Society,
and that kicking against bylaws would
not be tolerated on that boat.
Just then some fiddlers began to fiddle
as hard as they could, and great big
Gentle Lamb with black eye called out
for everybody to get a partner, and
minute later they were having regular
dance. was panied, that is, / should
have been panied in half minute more,
but young man came along with two
schooners of beer and wanted TO know
if we proposed to blk the Gentle Lamb
Sunday-School Library fund by turning
cold shoulder on the lager. spoke
to Med. about it, and he said we were
friends Of the little Lambs and had bet
ter take it, and the young man seemed
TO look on us more favorably after that.
The cheerfulness with which the beer
was brought mp from below was really
amazing. The dozen men engaged In
this noble enterprise were untlagging in
their zeal. II didn't seem five minutes
before q Young man with carbuncle on
his neck and his hat on the back of his
head came up and declared we were two
OF the bankedest blank Lambs he ever
heard of to be sitting there splitting cot
ton when they had twenty-siX kegs Of
beer aboard the boat, and he was falling
into a vein of oratory punctuated with
red-hot pokers when we cut him short
with an order. | asked Med. il we
hadn't made mistake and got on the
wrong boat, but he replied that every
body acted perfectly natural as far as
he could see. They hadn't begun friSk-
ing and smuggling quite as soon as usual,
but this was an oversight which we
really couldn't find fault with. They'd
make up for lost time as soon as they
got at it.
Then they had some more beer and
dancing and hilariousneSs.
Then Lambess whom I had never
seen before-a tall, willowy LambeSs,
with Sisterly smile on her face-came
up and slapped US on our shoulders and
smashed our hats down over our eyes
and wanted TO know why in-(you
know)-we were throwing cold water
on the benefcent enterprise,by refusing
to dance. l was beginning TO be en-
barrassed, and Med. was trying to ex-
plain matters, when two gentle Lambs
began to frisk about the pasture and
the delayed slugging-match begun.
Some paused to drink more beer, while