The Port Gibson reveille. [volume] (Port Gibson, Miss.) 1890-current, 1891-06-17
SOMEWHAT. FAcrrlous.

oid)-lts believing what you know
isn't true. (Fact.l-HWrard Lam
poO,l
The Voice Of Experience Lady
(in bric-a-brac store)-Show me
something handsome, but cheap.
Clerk-Yes; something for a we'd
ding present?-Lfe, ~
The Inexorable Laws of Etiquette:
Mrs. Laker (of Chicago Are you
ready for dinner ,dear2 Mr.. Laker-
| will be as soon as / take my coat
Of.-N y. San.
Stranger--Can you tell me when
the band begins to play? Police
mani kin I; it's not deaf / be.
Wait here, and whin it sthroikes
up I'll let ye know.-JHdge.
"He. put an enemy into his
mouth, says a western paper, "to
steal away his brains, but the en-
emy, after q protracted search, re-
turned without finding anything"
A Stroke of Policy: He desirable
catch h)-How slender and graceful
Miss Willoughby is 4 She--Yes,
and they cay her mother was just
like her once. She weighs 240 now.
Life.
A Connecticut deacon is under ar
rest for stealing $3.45 from the con-
tribution box. IL is hardly neces-
sary to add that his peculations ex-
tended over a series of years.-Biag-
hampton Republicans.
Speeches 10 be Lived Down Mr..
Smarty-No, Miss Jones, they can't
deceive me Im not such a big
fool rs / look. MISS Jones (endeav-
orlng TO fiatter)-No, indeed Ids
covered that long ago.--JRdge.
Enough is Feast: Old man
with emotion)-Do you realize, my
dear sir, that you are asking for my
only daughter? Young man (calm-
but if you had a dozen 1
shouldn't want but one.-M y. Sun.
At the Rehearsal Amateur ac-
tress-YOu must not say erit, Mr..
Sissy, when you leave the stage.
Amateur actor Showing the book -
That's what the book says, Miss
Stagely. Amateur actress (convinc-
ed)-Why, so it does.-EpOck.
This is no Joke a well-bred wo-
man never kisses the lips of her lady
friends. She may kiss your chin,
your check, your forehead +; but if
she has any social training, any true
delicacy of refinement, she will
never kiss your mouth.-ChicagO
lRter-OceaR.
81 hope you never play ball on
Sunday, Bobbie," said the new min
lister. tNo, indeed,D said Bobbie,
with fervor that smacked of the
religious. "Why not, Bobbie p
continued the pleased minister.
"Cause it's forbidden" "And by
whom, Bobbie ?" "Paw," said
Bobbie.
Tommy's Careful Politeness /:
Hostess-Here's piece of buttered
bread for you, Tommy. Tommy
(sadly)-Thank you. Hostess
That's right. ! always like to hear
children say "Thank you" Tom
my-Maw told me to say that, if you
gave me anything to eat, even if
'twa'n't nothin' but bread and but
ter.-CkristiaR AdrOcdte.
For People Who Intend 10 Build:
A $4,000 house" is one that the
architectural paper says can be
built for $2850; costs $500 accord
ing TO the architect; $500 accord
ing to the carpenter; increases in
expense to 1880 during the pro-
cess of erection; and you draw a
check for $5, 1853 before you move
in.-JOwnet Of Education. s.l'o
Rigid Court Etiquette "The
queen" writes a London cores
pondent, "eats at state dinners with
out gloves" The reason is at once
apparent. II enables her majesty
to get better grip on the wing of a
chicken. In wrestling with the
common hen OF commerce at the
dinner table, she must be handled
without gloves, or the battle is lost.
Gloves would also be very much in
the way when her majesty desires
to clutch an ear of corn by each
end, while she gnaws at it amid
ships, so to speak. A hundred
other emergencies might arise dur
ing the progress of a state dinner
wherein gloves would be In the way.
-BRfdetto.
Tn North Carolina: The tar
vineyards of this state are we'll
known everywhere, and rank with
those of Europe as TO adhesive
qualities and bouquet The mule
also fiourishes here. He is rarely
found associated with his own kind
here, but is oftener hitched up with
a highly mortified horse, or some
times budding heifer. The North
Carolina mule has never been en-
tirely satisfied with the terms Of
surrender at Appomattox, and it
has imbittefed him good deal, SO
that instead of taking up the duties
and obligations of life, be strikes
onn ae hafno rather n1orhid and nm.