Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1891-06-06
written for The Evening Star.
UNCLE REMUs' PHILOSOPHY.
The Old Man Tells About His Experisncs
with Atlanta"

Tn. Old Man Tells Abou. His Experi.nc.
| with "Ha'nts.''
| TEE STRANGE APPEARANCE AND pIsAPPRARANcR
| OF BASKET or vfcruALs-A CONFIRMATION
| BETWEEN CHLOE AND REMUs MISS sALLYs
KITCHEN ~ REroRTED BIZ JOEL CHANDLER
HARRIS.
LONE MORNING RECENTLY UNCLE RE-
Omus sat In his Miss Sally's kitchen with his
chair Tilted back and his head leaning against
the wall. His attitude was reflective, though
there was twinkle Of humor in his eyes as he
watched Chloe, the cook, preparing to make
waf1es for breakfast.
II hear TELL" he said after awhile, "dat
faint no use fer ter have no cook in dis house. {"
| How come dat?" inquired Chloe with some
interest.
| ',Ah, Lord, chile ~ exclaimed Uncle Remus,
shaking his head, '.you mos too much fer me
| when you Ak me dat. You know what de
preacher say: SO Is DESC, how come % 10 mo-
so.'"
| Il amt hear no preacher say dat yit," said
Chloe, eomplacently. ''Ef dey ever IL Say 1t
dey done say it long TO my time"
II hear tall" said Uncle Remus closing his
eyes and elevating his eyebrows, dat all you
got ter do is ter git you some -four en- lay 1t
dar in de pantry en- walk out back'ar on de
mex mornin' dar you'll fin yo' light bread done
ris up en- baked"
1T don't do dat Away fer me-" remarked
Chloe, .ei it did boun' you I'd feel mighty
"Dsy tells me-" the old man continued. dat
10 me an Miss Sally come here de whole place
"oh, hush, mani exclaimed Chloe, "who
Dem what know" said Uncle Remus, SOL
emnly. "But, bless yo' soul, honey, dey amt
had no needs fer ter tell me, kase time i sot
paths runnin thoo de grass en- no tracks in UNI,
en- de red spiders wuz a-spinnin' der wheels on
the front porch. Oar dey WIZ. 'Roun' on de
side or de house 'twant no better, en- right out
| dar on de back steps de snails had done writ der
name on de planks l know'd right den dat
ha'nt. had been projikin' 'roun' dar in dom
neighborhoods."
What you do den?' inquired Chloe, as Uncle
Remus paused.
"S'posin dat had er been you?' the old man
| asked in an argumentative way.
'.Man-sir" exclaimed Chloe, Aourishing
dishrag wildly above her head, ''ef dat had
been me. d q des riz an hew-dat would /!
Ef you don't want ter see human folks fly
don't you put me whar deys any ha'nts. Now,
"well," said Uncle Remus, II stood dar,
did, en- scratch my head. Iknow'd in reason
dat dem kinder doins can't be put up wild.
Den it tuck'n come in my head dat de signs
| what seed want sho' nuff ha mt signs. Oar
dey wuz plain es day, but low ter myself dat
maybe done 60. so ole en- fibble- minded dat
can't tell han sign hfe ] useter. So, den,
| what gwine do? gwine see fer myself
gwine come dar arter dark On see what kinder
capers dey cut up 'twix' shutdown On moon.
RISE"
"Oh % ,vav man -, sxclsim.a Cblo. nth
unfeigned astonishment
"Ysssum," said Uncle Remus. "dat 'zackly
| de way de idee struck me, en- she struck me
hard. mon. Iput out fer home en- got what
little scraps err vittles de ole oman done save
up fer me. Some er deze made way wild den
en- dar, and the yuthers tuck en- wrop up in
little piece err paper en- put il in nv pocket.
Zen after it got dark good, get down my hat
en- my cane en- come back fer ter see how dc
Ian lay"
"well, / tell you now" said Chloe. s.ef dat
had er been me, bum you Id or been gwine
tother way"
II come back, did, the old man continued,
zen sot out dar ON de front steps, De grass
wuz GROWN rank in de yard, dc front gate wuz
of de hinges, en- de winder blin's ratified eve'y
time de win drawed q bref. High ez de grass
wuz dey want no crickets a-skreakin' in It, en-
dey want none er deze yer big night bugs a.
zoonin' 'roun'. I sot dar, l did, en- low ter
myself dat dunner how come Marse John en-
yuther folks fuse ter live"
Oats de Lords trufel' exclaimed Chloe,
with JUNCTION. Uncle Rsmus took no notice OF
the interruption.
How long sot dar amt swins ter tell
yer-it mought er been one hour and it mought
er been two, moughter drappsd of in a doze,
en- mought er stayed wake; yit long or short,
sleep er wake, de fust news l know l hear
sump'n trottin' long on de peaz-zer-dip-dip-
dip-dip. l look 'roun, 1 did, en- dough it wig
dar 4 L.
dog comm lords me- Dis bout dat time it
seem like de dog seed me, en- he stop en- look at
me. 'FO' l kin shew at him wild my cane he
fetched growl en- run right at me. l shot my
eyes and hit at i'm, but dey want no dog dar.
Dey WIZ a sorter cracklin' SCUM like dry weeds
Albumin when he Tipped over my head
''Ah-ha!" exclaimed Chloe; what he do
den?''
dat what been pesterin' me-" said Uncle
Remus solemnly. "He Tipped up in de ar, but
tell YOU" the old man went on, seeing that
Chloe was speechless with astonishment. ode
creetur Tipped up in de air, but he amt never
lit on de groun."
..wa'n't you skeerd mighty nigh ter death?''
exclaimed Chloe, dropping suddenly in q
chair.
.'Dey amt gimme no time fer ter get skeer'd,"
said Uncle Remus. '.Mos' TO l fine dat de
big dog done make his disappearance, hear
sump'n come long de piazzer-dip-dip-dip-
iOOh TOuu ell oar WIZ q Uttl0
black dog lopin' long, en- time could shut
my eye, he riz en- made his disappearance wild
dat same cracklin' SCUM like weeds Albumin :"
''Whyn't you break an run?'' cried Chloe,
with some show of indignation.
"Shoo" said Uncle Remus "Runnin' FUN
ha'nts is like dodgin' thunder clap. Yit
| ain t a-denyin' but what got up FUN dar en-
done my level bes' fer ter fofler on after de
dogs Dey moughter made der disappearance
mo quicker dan what done, kaze dey went
away like BLOWN out light, but l lay dey
want no mo- willin' dan what ole Remus wuz
des tuck de highest cut right cross de front
yard. Ispeck dey wuz Q fence in de way. kaze
when went back dar mex day de palms wuz
strowed all long de street, en- folks wuz
stan'in' 'roun' AKIN one amer ef dey hear dat
drove er bosses runnin' away endurin' er de
night"
"Ah-yir exclaimed Chloe.
"Dat what dey say" Uncle Remus contin-
ued. 81 went back in dar, did, en- look all
'roun,' en- dey amt no deg track in de yard
Needer wuz dey any yuther sign ceppin' whar
struck de groun' one time twix' de front
| steps en- de fence"
''what you dc den?" asked Chloe.
81 went right straight back en- tell Miss Sally
bout dat ar place be'in ha'nted. Miss Sally
| look SO quare she got me frustrated. I bin
KNOWN er sence she wuz little bit er baby all
what she b'leivs en- what she don't bleive, Wit
she sot in de hall dar en- stood me down dat dey
want no ha'nts. Bimeby I hear Marse John
stirrin' 'roun' in his room. on den know how
come Miss Sally gwine on dat away. Marse
| John he come out en- Ak me what il it, en- den
he natally gimme Down-de-country. A little