The state herald., 1891-06-19
eoTH SIDES SATISFIED.
Vow d Bloody Ducl In Kcntucsy Was
Happily Avcrted.


The last dueling episode in the South
Ind romantic and II comical foaturo
that quite won the hearts OF the fair
sex and pacilied tho austerc authorities
OF the law, shys the New York Record
or. A bold Kentucky colonel was the
father OF II lovely daughter, who loved
n nice young man, In all respects un-
Objectionable. All the girls and ma
irons OF the country sympathizcd with
the lovers. and the gossips pronounced
it the happiest ailnir in the line of
marrying that had been heard OF for
long time
But the colonel was an obstinate
man. with very red countenancc,
fierce, gray eyes, and n nose somewhat
bottled in blue md purple from tho
long habit Of generous potations of
bourbon.
The more he heard of the cour,ship
the more he swore that he would have
no such puppy for u son-in-law, and
the young man got into such state
that no was afraid to sec his betrothed
except surreptitiously, and both were
afraid to even open the subject to the
colonel.
Happily, when tho path OF true love
does not run smooth, owing TO the
opposition Of II cruel parent, the misery
OF the situation hcightens TO delight,
and SO the wretched, happy couple
went on day by day, us tens of thou
sands have done before
The stolen interview and the sur
reptt.rSvs mote, tho agony and fear.
and tho constant suspense made the
hours glow with romance. But, anon,
tho colonel was told that an clopement
was on foot. He s,alkcd up and down
the hall muttering and growing some
thing to the effect that this was the
first time in his life he had ever been
opposed. and, by Jupiter and all the
other gods, 1t would be the last. Then
he sont for his friend, the major, and
the two worthless discussed whether
the presumptuous rascal should be
horse whipped, shot on sight. or po-
litely slaughtered according to the
code.
The Inst method was determined on
and Il challenge delivered TO the
enemy. with nm explanation OF the
condescension that accorded the chiv-
alrous terms, "as lady's honor wns
concerned. sir"
But womnn's quick wit, always
sharper under the inspiration Of love
and romance, suggested n rising act of
l,.. t-,.. la txs.
the maiden implorcd her lover to obey
her wishes, saying: "You know. dear,
how obstinate papa is. The only way
! can get anything is 10 pretend not 10
want II, and 1t was just so with man.
ma when she lived Now do you un-
dcrstandP'
In the meantime tho colonel nnd the
major prepared to make worms meat
of the poor lover.
The proposed fatal morning dawncd.
the gentlemen were promptly on the
ground and the ceremonies were about
to proceed as usual. when the lovers
friend approached the bloodthiisty
colonel with great formality and said.
Colonel, my friond has done you n
wrong which he proposes 10 repair
without the loss of his life, which would
only make the matter worse for the
young lady II is true that he declined
To marry her and -"
''lIc declined To- but tho mon
strosity Of the thing cholkcd the colonel
out of uitcrance.
"Ycs, md he desires TO olIcr m
humble apology and"
'ApologyW shouted tho colonol;
- his apology. Refuse To marry
| n Kentucky gentlcmnn's dnugh,erl by
all the Internal gods, wo'll roe about
that Major. get mo n preacher, sir,
! and n church, and all that sort Of thing
mighty quick. Thcre'll be wedding.
sir or a funeral In less than hnlf
hour, Not II word, gentlemen.
don't like puppy for n son-in-lnw.
bu, honor shall be yindicated."
or course the colonel had his way.
but II he ever finds out tho hoax hc
will burst II blood-vosscl or fall deal
OF apopleXy.