St. Paul daily globe., 1891-12-06
SUNRISE SIGNALS.

SONh1SEs SlGNALS.
Milwaukee is "deap set agin' st. Paul hay-
ing the national Democratic convention.
She thinks that she wants 1t herself Mil
waukee should get herself innoculated with
a little biehloride of patient resignation.
Edgar Fawcett has written a new story,
entitled american Push" 1t is the Ameri-
can "puIl, F." though, that gobbles the political
Offices.
Why should great poet like Goethe, and
great musician like Mozart. have been
ehristened ''Wolfgang?" We should as soon
think OF naming pond lily ''snarleyow."
Those jealous Chicago policemen who at
tempted to scare everybody away from the
worlds fair by midnight Y ell of 'Anarch-
ists!'' have become the laughing stock Of the
entire press of the country, and few of
them are seriously threatened with dis
charge.
+ IL the indefinite friend Of the GLoaE who
contributes bright, witty colloquies, puns and
epigrammatic sentiments without revealing
his or her identity will consent to disclose
himself or herself, it may prove of mutual
advantage. Anonymity doesn't go" in
well-regulated newspaper Office.
X"
That Russell scandal in England cannot
amount to much. The Prince of Wales is
not in it.
Under a Republican administration trains
are robbed in the suherbs of great cities,
children of wealthy bankers are kidnapped
and returned for heavy ransom, and dyna-
mite bombs are hurled at millionaires Still,
let us not forget that we owe the good
crops" of the Northwest to the Republican
party, assisted by the great and only Bill Nc
Kinley.
When Chicago policeman cannot club a
man into subjection he sinks his teeth into
the prisoners flesh. 1t looks as though
diet of horse meat was The first step toward
cannibalism.
Beware of the man with long hair-and his
little russet satchel stuffed with dynamite.
-"
Congressman Crisp is man after Gov
Hills own heart. Judging from Mr.. Crisp's
profile. he is. also, man after Gov Hills
own head.
The Chicago Evening Post suggests that il
the people of China fear trouble they should
see to it that the great wall is well covered
with broken bottles. 1t is thought that if
worse comes to worst, the Philadelphia
Glover club might volunteer to go over and
break the bottles
The Princess of Wales recently paid $3.50
for tabby cat. No wonder his royal iags
looks old, careworn and harried. A $3.50 cat
in the family is by no means well-spring of
pleasure.
-
There are 100000 blind people in Europe
If the estimate includes royalty it may ac-
count for the ease with which some of them
are allowed to glide into scandal OF magnif-
icent proportions.
So
The temperature of man is 9SI5: that of
fish q deg. And yet in nine cases out of ten
1t is the bunco-steerer and not the sucker"
who is the coolest blooded.
Here is another case of hes English, YOU
know" Sir Edwin Arnold says that the late
Lord Lytton was the best after-dinner speaker
he ever heard, and superior 10 our own
-Chauucey NJ. Depew at his best Still, true
patriotism will lead US to stand by Chauncey
in his acknowledged pre-eminence as a post
prandial anecdotist. In fact Dr. Depew is
The best fulldress monologuist in the world
even though he was Obliged to stand aside in
1883 and allow the Republican party to nomi-
nate little railroad attorney down in IN
diana.
Our esteemed contemporary. the Milwau-
kee Sentinel, says: Even the New York Sun
hesitates to approve Gov. Hills course 1t
is worthy OF remark that the New York Sun
has hesitated so much that it is already lost
X -
One of Chicago's public school teachers
stands accused of ferbidding pupils to come
I to school with onionladen breaths As it is
I impossible for pupils to leave their breaths
at home. it looks as though Chicagoans were
too prone to strain at an onion and swallow
horsesteak.
Now that Sir Edwin Arnold has indorsed
Boston's English. viii he do as much for her
beans
1t is now said that the world will come to
an end Christmas day. but the GLOBE will
come out regularly on the following morning
and tell you all about it, and how the people
seemed to regard little thing like that.
*
Bro. Wanamaker is keeping remarkably
quiet just at present. It is not known how
he will escape from the political hurly-burly
~
Chicago protective organ editorializes
anent '.An Enlarged Market" The protec-
tionists idea of an enlarged markets. to build
a Chinese wall around a small one.
Tacoma does not want:the national Demo-
cratic convention. That Seattle earthquake
gave Tacoma pointer.