The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1891-07-01
" MY Wife,

She's a very nice woman, my dear
Mickleberry, very nice woman, indeed,
said Mr.. Partanbridge, sagely but yon
allow her TO dictate too much For in
stahce, my wife should never tell me not
to smoke in the parlor on account of the
curtains - -
1t does often turn them yellow, y
observed Mr.. Mickleberry, thoughtful
ly.
Granted-but what becomes Of your
coniugal superiority E? And then you
didn't buy that corner lot because she
advised you not to What is a woman's
judgment worth in a matter of business
like that, Mickleberry ?"
Mary knows more than half the men
going" parenthetically asserted Mickle-
berry.
Excuse me, Mickleberry, but you
don't keep her in her place. Don't the
Scriptures expressly say that woman is
the weaker vessel? I should like to see
Mrs. Partanbridge venturing to oppose
me-"
Mr.. Mickleberry looked admiringly at
his big friend.
"How do you manage it, Partan-
bridge ?" he questioned, somewhat tim
idly.
"Tact, my dear fellow-tact, dignity,
supremacy. | wouldn't have mentioned
it if circumstances hadn't pointed direct
ly to the fact, but you are getting hen
pecked, Mickleberry. Everybody motto
es it, you know. You must assert your
self"
Mr.. Miekleberry laughed.
But what is the use of asserting my
self?" he asked, loosely. Everything
goes on like clOck-work at home-Alary
always meets me with a smile-she
spends the money sensibly, and never
has she asked me for an unnecessary
cent"
"Does she tell you how she spends
it ?"
" Not always, but"
Mr. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS his friend
with a groan.
" Oh, these women, these women l
/ should like to see my wife buying a
silk dress, as Mary did last week, with
out first consulting me"
" But she has saved the money out of
her housekeeping funds
Then, my dear fellow, it's a sign that
you give her too much money for house
keeping. Cut her down-draw the purse
strings little tighter"
Mr.. Mickleberry looked uncomforta-
BILE.
III should hardly like to do that"
Partenbridge."
You'll never be master in your own
house until you do"
Mr.. Moses Mickleberry went home
and told his wife all about what Parten-
bridge had said. Mary laughed, then
colored, but she was title angry with
al.
L wish Mr.. Partanbridge would mind
his own business" said she. I'm tired
of hearing about my wife She must be
a poor, spiritless concern.
Partanbridge is man Of great abiii-
ty," said Moses, grayely.
Fiddlesticks said Mrs Mickelber-
ry. A regular hen hussy-a thorough
going Miss Nancy! =
"I'm sorry you feel so about him, my
dear" said Moses for he doesn't Ike
the place where he is boarding now and
/ told him he might occupy our spare
room for few days"
"Oh, I've no objections to that" said
Mrs. Mickleberry, composedly. "Im al
ways glad to entertain your friends, my
dear, even if they are not the most
agreeable people in the world, and dare
say can get along with Mr.. Partanbridge
for few days"
You're a little jewel, my dear" said
Moses, and he forgot all Partanbridge's
insinuations at once.
Mr.. Partanbridge came, bag and bag
gege, and took possession Of the spare
room in the Mickleberry mansion as
Importantly as if he had been the Grand
Turk. And thenceforward my wife
began, hguratively speaking, to trample
Mary Miekleberry into dust.
MY wife " spent no money my
wife went nowhere my wife would
sooner cut off her hand than go to q wo-
mans rights convention my wife , was
not literary, but spent her days doing
housework and her evenings mending
stockings. She held her husband in sal
utary awe, never spoke when she wasn't
spoken to-and in short, she knew her
place"
And how did you manage it, Par
cambridge ?" asked Mr. Mickleberry once
again, in the admiration of his soul.
Mr.. Partanbridge waved his hand
loftily.
Mickleberry ~ said he, there are
some things that can't be expressed in
words"
Fortunately" put in Mrs. Mickle-
berry who was sewing away as vigorous
ly as if every stitch were an unuttered
protest.
And" went on Mr. Partanbridge, as
if he had not heard the interruption, il
is woman's duty TO listen-to submit
to keep silence"
There goes the door bell" observed
Mrs. Mickleberry win you 90, Moses