Fort Worth gazette. [volume] (Fort Worth, Tex.) 1891-1898, 1891-05-03
M'SWAT'S EXPERIMENT.
In Which tho Tongue That Never Told
Lie Got smoked Out.

In Which the Tongue That Never Told .
Lie Got smoked Out.
Mr.. McSwat went home one afternoon a
few weeks ago with something wrapped up
in brown paper. He laid it on the kitch-
Ell table, but kept his hand on it, as if it
were mystery too momentous to be IN
folded without taking precautions against
inficting upon the sensitive nervous sys-
tenn OF Mrs. McSwat sudden and unex-
pected shock.
''Well, Billiger, what is it,
Don't be in hurry, Lobelia All in
good time. l have made up my mind to
try a little experiment. | can hardly call
it an experiment, though. Il is such an
obvious, practical thing that lisa wonder
TO me it hasn't been done for a hundred
years. am going TO show you, Lobelis,
how to save money and add to the COM
forts of life
Mr.. McSwat then proceeded with great
elaboration TO open the package. He took
off the string, rolled it up into little coil,
and gave it to Mrs. McSwat.
''It's good idea, Lobelia,n he said Ito
save every piece of string that comes into
.ae house. You may need it some time"
She had bagful Of similar coils laid
away somewhere, tangled into an ineXtric-
able mass and running over at the top, and
had no use under the shining sun for an
other inch Of string, but she promised to
take care of this particular wad Mean
while Mr.. McSwat was slowly unrolling
the bundle. He brought to view at last q
beef's tongue.
There it is, GIobelia," he exclaimed.
Il don't see anything remarkable about
it, Billiger, except that it isn't smoked"
That's just the point, madam" he re-
torted. ''Fve got tired of paying sixty
cents apiece for smoked tongues that look
like section of dried monkeys forearm,
and taste as if they had been dug up out of
an Indian mound. I'm going TO smoke my
own beef tongues hereafter"
But how are you going to do it, We
haven't any smoke house"
"Just you wait minute aud you'll see.
Bring me an iron poker"
Mrs. McSwat hunted up the desired i'm
plement and brought it TO him.
Now observe"
He thrust the poker about half its length
through the slit in the smaller end of the
tongue.
He preceded her up stairs opened back
window, stepped out on the kitchen roof,
and made his way up by laborious climb
ing to the comb, and thence along to the
chimney at the farther end. Lifting him
self carefully up he placed the poker across
the top of the chimney, the beef tongue
hanging down inside.
CHATS the scheme Lobelia," he said,
clambering back to the window. It'll
smoke the thing all right and save just
forty cents. Catch me buying smoked
tongues any more.'
p.
chimney, Billiger," said his wife. I'VE
burn hard coal, you know"
"I'll fix that. Well throw in a slab
occasionally, and if that doesn't make
smoke enough we'll burn little soft coal.
They're both cheaper than hard coal"
They went down stairs, and for the next
twenty-four hours or longer, in compli-
ance with instructions from Billiger, Mrs.
McSwat and the amiable domestic, Ophelia,
piled the kitchen range literally with slabs
of wood and chunks of soft coal
On the morning of the second day after
Mr.. McSwat had put in operation his
grand scheme for saving money and add
ing to the comfort of living. he climbed
out to the chimney again, lifted the tongue
out and brought it down stairs.
"No discount on this job, Lobelia," he
said, holding it up. Its smoked till you
can't rest. Ever see finer looking tongue
than that"
Doesn't it look a good deal shriveled,
Billiger" inquired Mrs. McSwat dubi-
ously.
"A smoked tongue always looks shriv-
eled. All you need to do now is 10 scrape
it off nicely, peel off the skin and cook it."
Mrs. McSwat pulled the tongue off the
DOear laid IL down IN the tab and If
broke in two.
1t was covered with a thick denosit of
SCOT. was charred almost to the center. and
from its steaming interior came rich odor
- Lot, ronoar,t;hIo
Oft 1von,t need ,nv mora cooki,, Rilli-