Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1891-08-07
"A TOMBSTONE POSTMASTER.

"A TOMBSTONE POSTMASTER,
Gulf News: John P. Clum, post
ohice inspector, was in the city on
Wednesday He found everything in
good shape, but was not fayorably i'm.
pressed with the crowded room in
which our postofice is loc ated. II
there is any manin the country who
knows all about postofllce, it is John
.P. Clum. lie was postmaster at
Tombstone, Ariz., in the days when
Chocise and his band of Apache in
spectors used tornlT the stage drivers
and prospectors so fullof arrows that
the men who followed in the next
stage would pull the arrows out Of the
bodies and use them to bulld a camp
fire. The Apaches then assorted the
mail, and after culling out all the
nice picture papers sent by absent
friends to the miners, would send in
the balance to Tombstone for Mr..
Clum to hand out to anxious inQulrers.
Yes, John p. had tough time at the
delivery window, and when a man
came up and said, "John p, l want
that letter the stage brought in for
me yesterday" the letter was forth
coming, especially if big six shooter
was thrus, through the port hole at the
postmaster
Mr.. Clum was good and kind to all
of us, and it was no trouble to get let
ters or papers from him. He kept all
kinds in stock, and never raised his
priceif you called every hour in the
day. lie was not stuck up and did
not reserve his best letters for special
customers, and never played fayorte
with anybody. Ifa man kicked or
grumbled at a soiled yellow envelope
with an antiQuated stamp on it, he
would say hold on, have just got in a
new stock. Here is what Kinnear
Thought in ION blackboard, ana this
got in en- Sandy Dobs line, and he
would Cop down big bunch Of late
arrivals on the top Of a cracker barrel.
You could help yourself If you
wanted a letter with a six-shooter hole
in it, it was there. If alate SAL home
print" newspaper, like the ones pub
i,shed by the Mcfarland children, was
what yon were after, you could get
'cm, strung On arrows with telegraph
wire heads, You could get white en-
velopes spginkled with the stage
drivers gore, and 4 few hairs from his
scalp thrown in; il your fancy run that
way.
Talk about a popular postmaster,
why, John p, Clum was the boss.
We elected him mayor and would
have made him superintendent Of the
poor farm, bat the county was too
poor to buy the farm. There never
was any kic'dng in Mr.. Clum's post
Office, or backing or Alliny to take ad-
vantage Of your neighbor. John p.
ran the squarest game ever opened by
Uncle Sam anywhere, and you could go
down looi; at your hand, and bet all
You thoushtit was worth, from a. m,
till u NJ. You could not bluT the
postmaster, and ne ran the game wide
open, no cappcrs allowed or necessary.
If you did not Ike the first letter you
picked out, he would 60 down in his
pocket and hand you one of his own
received from tho department at
Washington. And John p. was
scrapper, too, in those good old days.
He would strap his old, absent-mlnd-
ed, mecH-looklng mountain howitzer
on his back, get into the middle Of
the street, and "hlye tout that way,
il you cast any reflections on himself
as the representative of the greatest
and frcest government on earth, or
the way he administered the "afiairs
of territory or ran a "Jcilersonian
simplicity" postoflce at Tombstone.
Mr.. Clum could have left the camp
with eight box cars full Of silver bricks
il be mad only improved his oppor-
but he didn't want wealth.
He left with the respect and good will
Of everybody, and viii ever carry with
him the best wishes of old timers,
who stakcd their lives TO enter Tomb
stone in the early days and tramp cut
busted.