Idaho semi-weekly world. [volume] (Idaho City, Idaho Territory) 1875-1908, 1891-07-17
POINTERS FROM BILL HYE

r. w. Mitchell, who has been APP
pointed Secretary and Sup't of the
Portland, Oregon, Industrial Exposi-
ton, writes to that wise sage and
great moral philosopher, Bill Nye, in
regard to the drawing qualities of GER
tain proposed attractions. He pro-
pounds thousand and one queries,
but we will omit the questions, and
have room for Bill's answers to but a
few of them: Here they are:
Sam Jones is good drawer. So
is Sara Bernhardt-in fact, they are a
pair of those. But we will let that
pass. Sam is straightforward preach
er, cheerfully telling people what
miserable hounds they are, and warn
ing them to flee from the wrath to
come, at SO much per warn. He will
not only bring thousands of curious
people to your exposition, but he will
save quite lot of souls at the same
time.
You speak of Mr. Gould IN show
window shearing coupons off his
bonds as a feature. / would favor
that, but you know, perhaps, that
Mr.. Gould cannot sit in draft, es-
pscially sight draft, as he has facial
neuralgia or Tic$oo. Do not depend
upon him, for am sure he could not
come.
Ensilago should be cut as early as
possible. Some use teetbing ring
for cutting their ensilage, but l think
it Injuries their gums. Gumquats
are not popular in exposition restau-
rants generally, especially during the
heated term. What are gumquats,
anyhow?
Special days are not advisable, I'M
less you think it would be we'll to
have special days such as you suggest,
"iio AVoi CCi Vail WOulu DO successful.
In that case, if you feel assured that
1t would be advisable to do so, YOU
might consider it good plan to do
80, and in case of success you would,
of course, be glad that you did so.
An exciting thing and feature
that has always drawn enormous
crowds everywhere that it has been
tried, is a discussion between two
able men on vital questions, like this
for instance, "Is the Tariff TAXI"
So many people would like to get
down off their dry goods boxes and
make experiments with industry if
they only knew whether the tariff
was tax or not AS it is now, val
ues are unsettled, industries languish,
resources remain undeveloped, trade
becomes atrophied, commerce ceases
and our shipping stands rotting at
our docks.
II you could solve this great ques-
ton of whether or not the tariff is
tax, the air would be full of men
getting down off the top of the rail
fences, and the rattle of closing jack
knives would gladden. the heart of
every true American. Men whose
wives have been bringing in the
wood ever since the war would, | am
convinced, take up the burden of
life, and some of them would turn the
clothes wringer while their wives take
In washing, if they could only know
from some good, earnest thinker
whether or not the tariff is or is not a
tax-or not.
1t is so, too, about religion. How
many of US would take up the bur
den of life with true alacrity and
true earnestness and praiseworthy
zeal and eagerness if we could know
more regarding the existence and
literary habits of personal devil.
How often l arise in the morning.
and inserting myself into a pair of
shlmmering trousers, from which the
glad sunlight is reflected in thou
sand different directions, and would
go gayly forth to renewed effort and
a more praiseworthy scuffie with sin,
it l knew whether or not the hosts of
the opposition were or were not led
by a personal devil