Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1891-02-12
misunderstood.


last"
Il Philadelphia Times.
MISUNDERSTOOD.
He-I hear you attend the Oratorio
Society's performances. Were you pres
ent at the "Crcation?n
She Gndignantly)-I suppose you Will
next want to know if sailed in Noah's
ark.-[ Illustrated American.
SHE NEVER KNEW.
He-What do you think of the ALI
ance for third party2
She (glancing at the chaperone)-1
never knew of third party helping on
an alliance New York Herald.
A DESIRABLE CONDITION.
'I wish | were a Canadian boy,n said
Willie, ruefully, after Mr.. Ferule, the
school teacher, was through with him.
"Why so?" asked Jimmie.
''They are not going to do any more
whaling for ten years"
ENTIRELY FAIR.
The maiden blushcd and hung her head,
"What do you take me for2" she said.
The young man spoke up eagerly,
"For better or for worse" said he.
= Pittsburgh Dispatch.
THE AIRS WE'RE NUMEROUS.
elbow did you enjoy the opera last
night?" asked Hojack.
1'Not very WE'LL" replied Passifer.
THE people in the next box prevented
me from hearing anything"
"They talked, did theyl"
"No, but they put on more airs than
the orchestra played. = Chicago Inter
Ocean.
WHAT WAS ON HER MIND.
81 am sorry to say, Mr.. Hicks" said
the Boston girl, 'that | cannot marry
you, but | assure you,n she added, has
tily, "this rejection does not necessarily
imply that you lack literary merit. 1t
may be that
Ea"You've had poems rejected, too, eh "
said Hicks, interrupting, and Penelope
blushed to think how she had given
herself away New York Sun.
TIE AUTHOR OF HIS INJURY.
Osborne--Harringto of course you
know of Halliburton; come, l want tc
introduce you.
ngton-Excuse me, l have no use
for that fellow.
Osborno-Why, what have you agains
him2
Harrington-Well, old fellow, o.
course you didn't know; but, you see, hi
Tilted my wife once. Bazaar.
FINE CHILD.
Caller-And this is the new baby.
Fond Mother-Isn't he Splendid
Galleries, indeed.
Fond Mother-And so bright2 Se
how intelligently he breathes.
A SENSIBLE GIRL.
Johnson-When l do marry | intent
to marry sensible girl, if | can fine
one.
Tomson-Now there's Miss Sharpe
she Tilted me
Johnson Just the girl want. Won
you introduce me3-l Epoch.
A YAcHTMAN.
May-And so you are an expert yachts
man, Mr.. Roundabout
Roundabout-Wby, no; l never han
died yacht in my lifcl
May-You didn't Then what a fb
ster Tom Ryder must bel He told mt
the other day that you were the cleveres
hand in the whole city at standing off
bar!-[New York Herald.
HE "wAsN'T IN IT."
Sanso-Have you been playing poker
for money!
Rodd (disconsolately)-No; but the
fellers I've been playing with have.
| PHILOSOPHY.
This world is like crowded bus;
A few good men, perhaps,
May find n seat, but most of us
Must hang on by the straps.
-[Chicago News.
HINT LOST.
Waiter (as guest rises from his chail
and moves away)-Beg pardon, but
haven't you forgotten something, sir?
Guest mot pleased with his dinner
Not at all! l may forgive, but never
forget.
A NEGATIVE FAULT.
Father-Whosc fault is it that you ar,
not nearer the head of the class2
Son--It's the fault of the other fellows
Father--How's that?
Son--'Cause they're smarter N be
-LEpoch.
USUALLY APPROPRIATE.
Sanso-Have you a baseball team il
your town2
| Rodd-Yes