Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1891-10-23
PITH AND POINT:

Otops Ut notnlng -your credit with Z
tho bank Washington Post. ~
A man who sleeps the sleep Of the just
is one who is just asleep.
AS the mercury climbs up the perspi-
ration rolls down.-AAanta journal.
Tho wheel to the wheelwright: Obi
you make me tired Washington Post
"Hello, Quinine2" "Why, Malaria,
old. boy, how arc your shake2"-Pa
ddelphia Times.
The telephone girl may be frivolous,
but everything she says gocs.-U Union
County Standard.
You can't give barefoot boy enough
to eat. His appetite has no bottom to
it. Galrestoa Mc,cs.
a man reaches turning.point in life
every timd he grabs the door kn6Ns3, u.
Binghamton Republican,
n kind husband will eat little of his
young wife's first bread if it kills him
outright. Galpestoa Neus.
It's the heiress's won't aud her fathers
will that keep the aspiring young man
mentally occupied. Washington Star.
The stores in which machines that tell
your age are displayed havo very few
women customers. philadelphia Record.
"These are jewels of my own setting,n
quoth the speckled hen, as she gathered
her chickens about -Bubass En-
quirer.
We all know people with whom wo
should never quarrel in the world il they
would keep 5000 miles away -Some,uaHe
journal.
There is young lady in West Mexico
who swallows pins for pnstime. Has
anybody ever got stuck on hcr?-1ferico
Intelligencer.
The man who speaks without think
ing is sure to come out second best with
the man who thinks without speaking.-
SomcroiHo Journal
She-..sI don't believe in long engage
ments, do your" He-"No; people are
apt to find out too many things about
each other. boston Me,os.
If the sun had nothing else to do but
shine on the righteous, it would be
hardly worth while for him to rise as
early os he does.-1'eras .Sytings.
If the United States is ever again com.
PEELED to let loose the dogs of war, it can
be sure of having on hand fine pack of
West Pointers Baltipao,e American&
She waits each night till get home,
And greets me at the door;
But 1t is not Tor my sake alone
She wants to know the score
Judge.
Nature has provided us with cye-lids;
but car-stoppers are wanting. This ex-
Mains xyhu ,yn offap 1o sNot -. .
although we hear it we'll set FORTH
Puck.
reflections of General Boulangern
are to appear in book form. There have
already been published in the newspapers
enough reflections upon him to make
companion volume. Philadelphia Led
ger.
Waiter cat fashionable restaurant)-,
"What is your order, aah2" Customer
"Bowl of crackers and milk. (Giving
him tip.) Hurry, please. My trains
leaves in three hours. '-Chicago Iri-
6une.
"Call him stingyl WHY, he is a man 5
that would divide the last cent with
you" "You don't tell met" eyes;
he is perfectly willing, for he knows no
one is going to ask him to divide mere
cent" "Oh"-lndianapolis Journal.
Alas said the tramp. al am hungry and
sore;
,d Is there no one to pity my plight
"on yes cried the dog, as he sharpened his !.
Come in, and I'll give you bite"
-Bdttimors american.
McFingle-"Griggs seems to have
given up his frivolous ways. saw him
wheeling the baby out the other even. s
ing" McFangle-"Yes, but if you had
gone by his house you would have seen
his wife using the lawn-mower."-B Boston
NeDs.
Miss Mabel Ito young NJ. D.)-"IAsa
what particular branch of the profcssi6
do you practice chiefly, DR.. Shiney-
seam2" DIR. Shinyseam 10 little sadly)-
Atpresent, Miss Mabel, am making a {.
speciality of vaccination cases. r-Nev
York Times.
Lucy-"Such an exquisite skirt as
your little daughter wore at the children's
fancy dress party Was it your design y, s
Ella-HNot exactly. You see, the
time was very brief, and I Just let her.
wear the shade of the parlor, extension.
$500 II sseo0tlIy 1'ttttSttit.
Dennis, the new plowboy tic the
mule which has insisted upon standing Z:
motionless for an hour) "Begorral but
yer the obstinate haste. AIasther snys
It's money makes the mare 90, an, after
eatin' dollar bill out o me hand, niyer
an inch have yez moved at all, Mt alp
Truth. Is
NOW, little boys, can you tell me, X e
said n Columbus teacher, awhas the
effect of tobacco is upon the system?', s
Little Billy, who has wrestled with his
first chew, promptly held up his hand.
swell, Billy, what iss the effect2p
''AIakes ye wisht ye wuz dead ~ Coluns.
Jus Post.
His friend had just surrendered his
seat to lady in downtown street.
car yesterday, when Mr. Portly, who
weighS nearly two hundred pounds. oh.