The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-06-12
BRIGHT BITS.
.CoRNEL1A Is a widow now. a.,

"CoRNELIA is a widow now."
Il hadn't heard of her husbands death"
"She married Lord Bancastle you know and
it seems that title has been extinct for sixty
years.-Life.
BUNKER lat 1870 p. NIL can't say like
Spatts altogether. He goes by fits and starts.
Miss Blanche with little yawn)-Wen, 1
wouldn't mind man going by fits if he did but
start 1nally.-Detroit free Press.
TRUE to some deep, mysterious law
Unfathomed by the student,
The furnace now begins to draw
That all the winter wouldn't.
-Aew York Press
FARMERS WIFE-Just fancy, Hofbauer, our
neighbor has been to-day making me an offer
Of marriage in case you didn't get better!
Sick Husband-What that fellow? it would
serve HIM right if died tomorrow Hun.ori-
Sttsche BIdtter,
ARE YOU superstitious?" asked a bystander
of a slowly rising young tragedian.
"A little" said the actor, sadly. 81 have
learned from experience that to have Just thir
teen people IN the audience inevitably means
bad luck. "-SomeTUiIle Journal.
NELL say, Jack, borrowed your walking
stick, and one of your collars, and your Elton
cap. do so dote on masculine cvt. Think
look chapple like'
Her Brother-Well, l can congratulate so far;
you don't look at all ladyiike. Gray
Monthly.
EFFIE-Wouldn't you like to ride on my BIZ
cicle Amy?
Amy-No, thank you; I'm afraid I'm too
heavy.
Effie-Why heard Jack tell you in the parlor
last night that you we're as light as a feather
Nelo York Continent.
WArTs-So she refused you, did sheP
Dumley-Yes, said she wouldn't even be a
sister to me, That made me mad, and now
she's got to be one to me.
Watts-Howis that?
Dumley-f proposed to her sister and was &C.
capitalization Herald.
Nov. MY DEAR PASTOR, 1 do hope you wilt
pardon me for bothering you SO long with my
own little family cares and anXietieS!"
My dear madam, don't mention it 1t has not
bothered me in the least. While you were talk
ing l was thinking out my next Sunday s
sermon. "-Fltege11de Batter.
sis Mr.. PULLIAM originate"
things"
But how do you know when they are original
and when they are not?"
Il know they are original when hear every
body going around disclaIming them. Life.
MIKE-Are yez comm to my Maggie's we'd
din, Pat?
Pat-I can't come, Mike. I've had me arm
broke at two weddin's this winter, me eyes
BACKED at another, an wuz knocked down an
jumped on at another. If had chance to
lick some one, Mike, I'd come. But fate's agin'
me.-HGrper'S Bdzdr
GRANDMOTHER severely to Johnny, who is
calling for a second plate of pudding)-You
ought to know better than to call for pudding
twice at the dinner table; you didn't hear me
doing it.
Little Johnny-No, ma'am, and you won't
hear me doing it either when get to be as old
as you are. --Drdke's Magazine.
''GEssLER-Who was Gessler?" said Mrs.
Beckram to her husband.
He was tyrant my dear, and also a life
insurance agent"
What do you mean by such nonsense?'
There is no nonsense about it, Mrs. Beckram,
l assure you. Does not William Tell say to
Gessler in the third act; 'Ha. tyrant, has thou
| not given me assurance of my lifeY Your hus-
band, madam, never makes a statement that he
| is not prepared to support by documentary
evidence Terds Strings.