Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-12-31
COMMON SENSE IN SURGERY.
A Brief Popular Paper on Some Recent
Triumphs i'm Practical Surgery.

Triumphs in Practical Surgery.
"A doctor and surgeon NAV be the
same person." remarked the philo-
sophical trainer. oraculary, but they
seldom are. If YOU whine-as the
dogs do when their feet hurt after a
hunt-or if you limp or complain
doctor guesSeS what is the matter with
you. Then he guesses what will cure
! you. Ii both guesses are right, you
are in luck. and he is Skilful doctor.
In nine cases out Of ten he is giving
you something harmless, while he is
| taking n second and third look at YOU
Cat your expense, of course) to guess
over himself
His medical pessinIsm and his sur
gical optimism amused and entertained
me. and | encouraged him 10 90 on.
'Now with Il surgeon it is different.
Surgery is an exact science. Before |
took this position | was Il surgeons
assistant in hospital. In some places
we are called trained nurses. In our
place we were called surgeons assist
ants. That's why | make such a dis
tinction between doctors and surgeons.
I've seen the two work side by side so
long. I've seen some of the funniest
mistakes made. and I've seen mistakes
that were not funny. I've seen post
mortem examinations that would have
! made surgeon ashamed that he had
ever been born. looked .on bv the
doctor who treated the case rs not at
all strange; didn't stagger him il bit in
| his own opinion of himself and his
scientific knowledge next time. | re-
| member one case. 1t was a Japanese
bov. He WAS as solid us 4 lite OK,
but he told Dr.. C that he'd been
taking homeopathic prescription for
Il cold. That was enough for DR..
C.. A red rag in the van of
bovine animal is nothing to the word
homeopathy to DR.. C. HYDRO
pathy gives him fits. and eclectcism
almost lays him out. Not long ago he
sat on jury which sent man to
prison VINO had failed in case of
'mind-cure.' That gave deep delight
to his regular soul. Well. Dr. C
questioned the little Jap who could
not speak good English, and had the
national inclination to agree with
whatever you say. Ever been in
JapanP No? Well. they are droll
you say Or suggest.
Did you ever spit blood?' asked
Dr.. c., by-and-by, after he could
find nothing else wrong except the
| little cold for which the homeopathic
physician was treating the boy.
Once replied that youthful victim.
Aha! we are getting at the root
of this matter now said DR.. G..
| Now tell me truly. Be careful! Did
you spit much blOodP
Yes, sir; good deal
The doctor shifted. He always
knew that homeopathic humbug
could not diagnose Il case, and would
| be likely to get just about as near the
facts as Il light cold would come to
| tuberculosis.
How long did this last?' he in
CURED of the smiling boy.
81 think-it seem to me-
"A half-hour?' queried the doctor;
twenty minutes?
IL think so. Yes, sir. About half
an hour-twenty minutes responded
the obliging youth
Il heard that talk. Common-sense
told me the boys lungs were all right;
but it was none of my business. and so
[ watched him treated, off and on. for
lung trouble for over Il month before |
got chance to ask him any question.
Then asked. incidentally.
.'What made you spit that blood
that time. Chip
IL didn't know l ought to swallow
him. he replied. wide-eyed and anxious.
Dentist pull tooth. He say to me,
Spit blood here" l do like he tell
me. Your doctor Say ver' bad for
lungs. spit blood. Next time l swal-
low him
Il helped another practitioner. in
good anC regular standing. to examine
"a mans heart. He found Il pretty bad
wheeze in the left side. I had to
nurse that man. He had been on
bat. and all on earth that allied him
was that spree. but he got treated for
heart trouble. 1t scared the man al
most to death.
I'D learned how a heart should
sound. so one day tried his. He was
in bed then. and it sounded ali right
so when the doctor came 10. took him
aside. and told him that man was
scared about to death over his heart.
and it seemed to me all right-sounded
like other hearts-and his pulse was
all right too. The doctor was mad as
March hare, though he had told me
to make two or three tests, and keep
the record for him against the time of
his next visit. Well, to make long
matter short. the final discovery was
the man don't know it yet, and he is
going around in dread of dropping off
any minute with heart failure-that at
the first examination the man had re-
moved only his coat and vest. and his
new suspender on his starched shirt
had made the squeak. That is cold
fact, and that man paid over eighty
dollars for the treatment he bad for |
his heart. "-Heleis II. Gardener, IN
Harper's Mrgazt'ae.