, 1891-01-31
A FOOL KILLER NEEDED.
His Services at Once Demanded in
a Kansas Town.
An Alleged Poet Who lmagines
Himself a Wit.
He lnflicts a Communication on
Governor Barber.

TUG EoNei'uE Ol u state seeus 10 Dt u
fair mark for all the crabks in the coun-
try. When they have any new hair
brained theory to prOmulgate. the various
governors are sure to hear from them,
usually with an intimstion hat a small
contribution will not be considered offens-
i've. Governor Barber is coming in for
his share of this sort OF attention. Among
the letters which reached him yesterday
was one which is almost superlauve in its
rank idiocy. On the printed letter-head
on which the letter is written is placed in
small type and with various ornaments
tons these announcements:
HERNANE.
A Humorous Comedy-Hernarne, the
babe. child. maiden. lover, soldier, gen.
eral. Fun, poetry, love and war. Now
with my printers. Advance orders for
this volume, cloth bound, 300 pp.. must
be accompanied with the price, 90 cents,
prepaid.
ELBLANKE.
A romantic tragedy, The history of
Lulus, Princess of Atlantis, a kingdom of
that legendary continent submerged in
the sea. Cloth, 246 papes. Gettysburg,
in the same volume, price SO cents, pre-
paid.
GETTYSBURG.
A martial poem, descriptive of that
great, decisive struggle on Northern soil.
In same volume with Elblauke, cloth, 246
pages. Price prepaid SO cents.
The letter itself, which is peculiarly
fresh, is as follows:
WIN. B. FELTS,
Attorney.
RUSSELL SPRINGS. Kan, Jan. 2l.-
Governor of State, Cheyenne. Wyo.-
PARD:-Is 1t a go? Please let me hear
from you by the first mail or the next pre-
ceding one. Truly yours,
WIN. b. FELTs.
AS if the letter and its printed an
nouncsments were not IdIotic enough it Is
accompanied by a printed circular OF the
following is a literal copy:
ELBLANKE.
House joint resolution No. 80.
WHEREAS, William B. Felts, a citizen
of the State of Kansas. has written
"Elblanke-L~-e-Love, a Tragedy"
and
WHEREAS. He has written a martial
poem, Gettysburg"
Which tries to celebrate that valiant host
That stood to breast the storms of civil war
And paid in human lives and blood the cost
To save their country in rebellion lost; and
WHEREAS. These two productions have
been published by him in a neat little
cloth bound volume of 246 PIP; and
WHEREAS, this volume is for sale at
house oft the Kellam Book and Stationery
company OF Topeka; and
WHEREAS, This book gives eveldenee
of literary ability and dramatic power;
and
WHEREAS, William B. Felts Is a young
citizen of this commonwealth, destined to
do work of merit in the future, and be-
come one OF the sweetest warblers among
the sunf1owers in the land of poetry and
sopg-kansas; and
WHEREAS, We believe him worthy Of
the encouragement of the Sunflower state,
and
WHEREAS, The Alliance legislature OF
this state should feel it incumbent upon
itself to be ready and willing at all times
to perform a meritorious and pralseworthy
work: Now. Therefore, be it
ReSotred, Every member of this legisla
tnre, res ardless of political creed concur,
ring therein:
Section l. That we recognize the abil.
ity Of the boy author and citizen.
Sec. 2. That we hold him in favorable
reputation aud accept his first juvenile
work as bis note of hand and promise to
be redeemed at a future day.
Sec. 3. That the sum of 90 cents be
appropriated from the purse OF each
member OF the legislature Tor the purpose
of buying each said member one of his
books.
We do hereby certify that the above is
a faithful copy of the original enrolled
house resolution No. 90. and that it is
binding IN its action upon each and every
member of the legislature whatsoever his
political affiliations may be.
JOE JONES,
Guy Ass T. Cute ISIS of the Republican
Party.
JNo. SMITH,
High Muck a Muck of the Alliance.
Bill THOMPSON.
Prophet Of the Unwashed aud Unterri
fed.