The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-05-10

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plants Iounu only IN Central Arabia, Bel
loochistan. and the mountainous region OF
the northwestern frontier of Grim Tar
tary." Oh. there could not be anything IN
it, of course, it was q swindle. II 1t were
only genuine, / felt that would not hest
tate for single instant. At that moment
the door opened and Bumstead-l mean
Mr.. Wyatt-entered.
"Well, my young friend" he said, with a
good humored smile, ''what is your deter
mination?"
"Mr. Wyatt" said, and I assumed my
very best professional manner, IF could
only believe in the genuineness OF these
testimonials; if could only think that the
Infallible Tincture does all that it is said
to do; if could only honestly believe in it,
would cast principle and pride and preju-
dice to the winds and instantly jump at
your most liberal offer"
you don't mean to say that you doubt
the genuineness of the testimonials" cried
Mr.. Wyatt, in evident indignation. Then
he read Lord Anticipates testimonial very
slowly and very softly. DIR. Sprigge," he
said, at its conclusion, Lord Addlepate Is
peer of the realm, one OF our hereditary
legislators. Would you presume to doubt
the word of an hereditary legislator? Call
on his lordship, you are physician; you
can form your own opinion. The whole
of these testimonials, sir, are absolutely
genuiner' cried Mr.. Wyatt, and he
thumped the table with his fist. Il be-
lieve in Bumstead. sir, and I've never had
days illness in my life" did not think
much of that argument.
Look here" said Mr.. Wyatt; "I'u make
you present of gross of it, Take it to
St. Skinfint's and try it on your pa
tients." The horrible suggestion caused
me to shudder in spite OF myself.
"Do you care so little for my daughter,
DR.. Sprigge," said Bumstead-I mean Mr..
Wyatt-very solemnly. that you actually
decline to investigate the natter Didn't
the whole world believe the earth to be IA.
till it was proved to be round? Wasn't
Columbus looked upon as fool and an
impestor? Let me tell you, sir, the day is
coming when all the world will revere the
name ofBumstead.
When l looked round upon the evident
signs of wealth, when looked into that
old mans face, and / remembered that he
was Laura's father, I could not doubt the
honesty of his convictions. I seized his
hand; there were tears in my eyes as
babe him an affectionate farewell.
II will investigate it, STRIP l cried, "aud
will communicate the result to you in a
fortnight"
Then we shook hands.
/ went into the nearest chemists. / ask
ed for a bottle of Bumstead's infallible
tincture.
Its very valuable remedy, sir, "-said
the chemist; most of our customers find
it perfect panacea.
1t was strange, very strange. Your true
psychologist never hesitates to make a
crucial experiment upon his own person.
/ took a double dose of 'Bumstead" that
night. 1t did not have the slightest effect
upon me. | finished the bottle the next
day; it did not even make me feel i'll.
did not think much of "Bumstead" as
medicine. Most valuable remedies make
you feel very i'll, indeed-that is my expert
ence. Then called on six of the testi-
monial givers. They all swore by bum
stead" "a man must take medicine of
some sort, sir" one remarked to me; when
I'm a bit out of sorts just flies to Bum
stead and it does me power of good"
My next step was to insert an advertise
ment in The Agony Column of the Times.
1t ran as follows:
To the physician who recommended BUM
stead's Infallible Tincture" to an aged noble
man suffering from heart disease in the Pull
man train running to Brighton, on the after
noon of Tuesday, the 18th. Kindly send address,
and greatly oblige Lord X.
Then followed an address in Mayfair.
got 237 answers to that advertisement.
Over 1000 them sang the praises of Bum
stead" Thirty inclosed prospectuses of
rival medicines. One was a very rude let
ter. 1t ran as follows:
DEAR BUMsTEAD-I1l give you testimonial
with pleasure on receipt of O postal order for
one pound.
The six remaining letters were all from
medical men. Each of them declared that
they remembered the incident perfectly
that Bumstead's Infallible Tincture was
the very thing, and each of them intimated
to Lord x. that he had better consult the
writer at his earliest convenience. One
was from the senior physician of St. Skin
fint's.
After such evidence as this, could doubt
any longer? Could any man who pos
sessed well balanced and judicial mind
dare to doubt such evidence as this2
"Bumstead' must indeed be an infallibe
remedy when six eminent physicians, each
travelling by the Pullman train to Brighton
on q particular afternoon, should each
have the good fortune to meet with an
aged nobleman suffering from heart dis
ease, and each and every ONE of them from
the very bottom of his heart recommended
"Bumstead" as matter of course.
On the appointed day | called upon Mr..
Wyatt. | respectfully saluted him as
benefactor of the human race. Within
three months married Laura. l gave up
the practice of the profession as a matter
of conviction. l went into partnership
with old Mr.. Wyatt. He died year or
two ago. He left everything to Laura
am a rich man now. | live in Kensington
Park Gardens. and have a lovely place in
the country, and | became-I practically
became-well-"Bu st. James
Gazette.
How the Oyster Feeds.
How the oyster feeds may seem a prob
L !.