davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1891-07-17
nnmmrr hfsOrls.
ARVERNE.BY.THE-SEA, l. l.

AKVEKNE uUTEL NJ" VrH ,,,oa
directly on the ocean superb beach; staphs Railway
III. tim 4 Y. via Long Island iAi" m
,,o1 40 minusT ri ,1OI RENT
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1891-07-17

r YdLEw0OD HOUSE. Engl.Eood; \. ,!a;.,on, .,n,..
nv trains daily t. Nen.Yori moderate prices.
II sOPUS ON THE HUDSON.-Bo1rd farm IN the
IL h, plenty na~ fruit ana fresh vegetables price,
90 pr W. N. NIBLoCR, Esopus, " Y.
HOTEL ALLA HIPEEEiyc LAKE NJ
Directly on beach First class Ate;a9 water
TrnTEI FS-ICK -Hclthic,t mouatln resort In Amerl.
Il NJ F,SiCE Pr51'r IiyoahG Ike, Lyco.n-nr Co., Pa
II IGnLAND n0rsE occa2 froy} moi JLSepi,93
S. sG9 to s.! H'''' "'''' ''''' +. D. RoSEcEXNs.
HOTEL EARLINGTOE, -. 30
IL r1cnffiRfETI,65 S}HrRHiHHG$S3, w.
+. II. EARLE. owner and Proprietor.
AkE CL1RGE .
Rates moderate. 70, circulars, adde's
GEO. 4. TEi"Ts. Cleyerdae, " y
AwREYCE BEAcH HoTlr TawISnce T. ITSo lSS
Eotlsqne p Isgad5ya I 2e eH or5hctra
eTsss se.'H II. ' D. PSSTUHRs PToprle,or
, oNG BRANCH-THE FLoEENCE.I,Fi, "-f lamily
- 9S, l ocean We've eleScnt table, Terms go
Tor persons.
II A1.MnR HOUSE, SPRING LAKE, y. -,
l''n N1''O"' G. FALMi.R CLEAVER.
rT,1E HOLLYWOOD HOTELS.
VIII d opa6 E Iar gas,t t. June June 1.
k kddSss 20 f' FIXED n6EY Long nranch N. j.
nv He STRATFORD." ~
at 1taa aG ben rug M S$' " LYMAN Lock clos
VAN VEGHTEN HOUSE. SARATOGA SPRINGS. Ny.
ono block from Roadway: hrstcla-s in al H. ap-
large ~ ROOMS special for sent
tcn'ent H. hotels and springs Mrs $ VAN VtGIEN.
THE "CAhLETON" .,-, ,,,,.-,, ~
Onion Tune l. SpeCIal rates June and September.
|. =. HINKNON. proprietor.
VIZ OODWARD COTTAGE. 100 S. Maryland ave- Allan
w tic CITY n J. Located finest part OF the island.
near the ocean modern improvements terms $40 TO go
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1891-07-17
THE KITTATlN NY,

DELAWARE WATER GAP, PENN.
Now OPEN A mountain resort celebrated for grandeur
q scenery and heathfulness. For circular and terms
address W A. BROADHEAD SONS.
SBURY PARK. n. }.
4 HOTEL ALBION.
Cor. I'd and ocean 80 Yards from the surf I2th
orcbetf9; :rins from IS SIP week transents 81
per day :. II: fI-M DEn1OA.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1891-07-17
Summer Resorts.
LONG BRANCH.
LONG POINT HOTEL,

INTTED HUI
Newly furnished aud decorated select family and tr
sient hotel
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1891-07-17
HOTEL COLUMBIA.

BELMAR n. j.
18th Season.
Finest location the coast. Hotel open AFTER Jun
1sth For circular, terms. &c, address - 49,
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1891-01-16
SEAL FlNlSHERS.
Hands Must BE SkIllful to Sew the Costly
Sacques of Fur.


Sacques of Fur.
About this time of the year there is
plenty of work for seal finishers, or girls
who know how to sew sealslSins and
other furs. The employment of girls in
this sort of work is comparatively re-
cent. A few years ago the cutting and
sewing of fur skins were mainly done
by men. Sometimes man would teach
his wife or his daughter, but the men
monopolizod the best work and earned
good wages. There is skin cutter now
working as a journeyman in this city
who is said to be worth 100000, and yet
works his regular hours. He has intro
duced several generations of his fam
ily into one or another branch of the
business.
OF late years the sharp competition
which has got into the fur business as
we'll as other lines OF trade has led to
increased employment of females as
sewers. The work is nice, and requires
good deal of skill. The smooth, even
color of lady new sealskin sacque is
not produced without q good deal Of pa,
tient skill and dexterity OF course,
skins do not como perfect, There are
slight blemishes that need to be cor
rected The skillful cutter takes a
skin and blows the hair aside until he
can see the roots all over the skin. If
he finds spot that is bare of hair he
must select piece of skin to fit it, and
the hair must be exactly of the right
length to fit. On seal the hair near
the. tail is shorter than the hair near the
head. OF course, piece of fur from
near the tail will not fit in a bare spot
near the head of skin The cutter has
a peculiar method of shaping the pieces
to be set in, and this must be under.
stood by the girls who do the sewing, SO
that a girl who has worked at the husi.
ness becomes an expert, and girl who
has not served any apprentice at sewing
furs is of little use in the shop
1t is not an unusual thing for one
! large establishment 70 have fifty OF
sixty girls sewing fnrs in the busy sea-
son in the summer. The most expert
girls readily get employment the year
round, while those who are less expert
are the first to be discharged, and &c
from shop to shop The wages earned
are somewhat higher than the prices
paid for ordinary sewing, as the bust
ness Is somewhat unhealthy and re-
quires considerable skill The girls
earn from nine dollars a week upward
Frequently, when fur houses advertise
for help, girls apply who ire totally ig
norant of the business, and pretend
they know how, but & ey are soor
] found out and discb argea- IN. Y. Sun
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1891-01-16
WIT AND WISDOM.

When it comes to giving advice the
--Atohison Globe.
The design of the silver dollar is to
improved, but it is expected to be just as
hard as ever to get the coin.- Pittsburgh
Chronicle.
Turn About is Fair Play. you
love me, Marie?' "Yes, Arthur, with
every fiber of my being" II will be
brother to you."-N. Y. Sun.
1t is we'll thore is no one without a
fault, for he would not have friend
in tho world, he would seem to belong
to different species. -Hazlitt.
Did lovers tell truths as they know 'em,
Their luck would be very much worse,
Icalled her "a beautiful poem,"
Well knowing she wasn't averse
-Harper's Bazar.
You ought to tako more exercise
Play tennis" 81 can't play tennis"
"That don't make any difference You
can get just as much exercise trying to
play. "-Harper's Bazaar.
Tailor Ito would-be customer) )-"Sol
You want me to make you full suiti
Look here, now; a whole suit is little
too much. would rather, think, lend
you $40. "-Fliegende Blatter.
M. Alexandra Dumas fills has begun
in morning paper series of hitherto
unpublished maxims of his own. One
runs as follows "Give aims anony-
mously, for then they have the dou-
BILE advantage Of doing away with In
gratitude and abuse at the same time.
Tho Handy t, Man. -Wife-'That
pane of glass has been out all summer
and now freezing cold day has come
and we need it in. I've told you forty
times to send man here to fix it, Why
in the world haven't you done it?' Hus-
band-"Because / can fix it myself
| Good News.
Show me boy who loves his moth
er, and will show you one who will
make faithful friend, noble lover,
and a loving husband. Show me one to
whom home love has no attraction on
the ground that 1t is too slow, and will
tell you never to trust that man with
any thing thatconstitutes the happiness
of others. Young Christian.
Shortening Call.-Mother-My
dear, when ladies call on you, you
should not spend the whole time talk
ing about your music, as you did this
morning, Daughter-But, mother, tho
callers this morning were married
ladies'; and if hadn't kept them on
music, they would have got started talk
ing about their babies and they wouldn't
be through yet-N. Y. Weekly.
"A Terrible Blow Mo-" observed
one of the neighbors who had called to
see the new baby, "the child's mouth is
none too large And see how mobile
and flexible it is. You will live, Mrs
Banks, to see this little girl become an
accomplished elocutionist" And the
young father, who had been listening
unobssrved at the door, went of up
stairs, crawled into an attic, and Wept,
Chicago Tribune,
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1891-01-16
Chinese Alligators in London.

Two examples of the Chinese alliga-
tor have just reached the Geological
Gardens. They are the first that have
ever been exhibited here alive. The
alligator is so distinctively an American
animal that the proof, so recently as
1879, of the existence Of a species in
China, was extremely interesting. New
ertheless the Chinese classics contained
numerous references to the creature,
and even pictures, which could be
easily recognized as being meant for a
crocodile of some sort 1t is to be hoped
that the specimens at the Zoo will bear
out the notion of the extreme longevity
of the reptile. Its name is apparently
used in certain parts of China in the
same sense as Methusaleh in this coun-
try. Marco Polo wrote about this ami.
NAL, and recommended its gall as an
excellent remedy for the bite of mad
dog and for various other complaints, sc
that it seems to have been the medieval
equivalent of some of our much adver
tised remedies Of the present day. Gu
riously enough, the beast is even nov
made use Of in Chinese medicine Lon
don News
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1891-01-16
NUMBER 10.
RELIGIOUS AND EDUCATIONAL.

Men may Judge us by the success OF
our efforts; God looks at the efforts them-
selves. Charlotte Elizabeth.
Mr.. Trow Ahok, prosperous mer-
chant of Foo Chow, has just given $10,-
600 to found an Anglo Chinese college in
that city.
"A man can no more be Christian
without facing evil and oonquering 1t
than he can be a soldier without going
to battle, facing the cannon's mouth,
and encountering the enemy in the field.
-Chapin.
"A good supply of students is COM
ing forward in the Presby terian Church
of England; the classes will be we'll at
tended again this session, and almost
entirely by young men from her own
congregations.
Philadelphia and not Brooklyn, says
the New York Critic, is the city of
Churches" New York and Brooklyn to-
gether have only 76O churches for pop
ulation OF 2,419,000 people Philadel-
phia has $40 churches, besides 81 denom-
national and II undenominational mis-
sions, for population of 1,050,000.
The recent visit of Methodist bishops
to Washington was made memorable by
the planting of eighteen plane trees.
one for each bishop, in circle around
the highest point on the Methodist Uni
versity grounds, known as the t'crest"
1t is the highest land in the District of
Columbia and commands view OF sixty
miles in one direction.
The sum estimated for elementary
education in England and Wales for
1S90-'91 is about $1S,000,0 0,0O0 This will
probably cover A per cent. of the entire
expenditure, and with the amount de-
rived from local rates, will make up
two-thirds the cost of the schools the
remaining third being met by fees, sub
scriptions, and other sources. -Educa-
tion.
The Tuskegee Normal Institute,
Tuskegee, Ala, which has been from
the first oflicered by colored people, has
entered upon the most prosperous year
in it's history. There are 425 students
present, representing thirteen States,
and double this number would be pres
ent if there was room. A friend in New
York has just given $4,000 toward the
endowment fund.
Think how your own happiness
filed you with kindliness to other peo-
pie, but ask yourself at the same
time: Did any such thought as this
come up first and foremost to my mind,
and seemed to me the most precious
part of all my blessing, that God
had done this for me just to make me
filter and more transparent medium,
through which He might send his COM
fort to other men?"-Phillips Brooks
| One of the best features in recent
college reforms is the increased atten.
tion given to the study Of the Bible. A
chair has lately been endowed at Prince
ton for the sole purpose Of promoting
Bible study under q competent instruc-
tor. Under Prof Harper there has been
a noteworthy increase of Bible study
among the college students at Yale
During the current year sixty-seven
seniors and ninety-two juniors elect
course Of two lectures week on the Old
Testament the English Bible being the
only textbook, while Oriental history
with especial reference to the Bible will
be required study in the freshman
year. IN. Y. Examiner
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1891-01-16

The hours drifted by as lightly as the
foam on the waves that swelled under
the yachts snowy keel.
"Where on earth have you been%'
said Thalia, sharply, when Dorothy
came in after luncheon-time.
Sailing with Mr.. Campbell" was the
quiet reply.
"ln the MyosotisP Humph! l think
he has a great deal to do to run away
with Mr.. Gordon's yacht. He wanted
to take US fishing this morning, too. /
declare, some people have the cheek Of
an elephant"
81 am very sorry" said Dorothy,
quietly.
"And you haven't put the fringe on
my sash yet You know want it to.
night, too"
ut will be ready for YOU"
Thalia 6ounced out of the room.
81 wish hadn't promised to go to-
morrow" thought Dorothy, with a sigh.
But on the morrow her regrets had
vanished.
nv 4nJ ooOVio 10y aV uhOhOI dU btlo
landing for weeks. One day 1t was
Gordon who went sailing; the next 1t
was Campbell. They never went 10,
gether.
'Your cousin seems quite kindly dis
posed to my friend Gordie, said Camp
bell, one day, down on the rocks. 81
rather think it will be go--don't you?'
Very likely" Dorothy said, stitch
ing away at the embroidery she had
brought with her.
"Put that sewing away, won't you?'
Campbell persisted, impatiently "You
are always at it,"
81 have to do it," Dorothy said, quiet
ly. II am paid to do it,"
"Well," said Campbell, pulling it out
OF her hands, "l'll pay you to put il
away. Do stop! want you to listen tc
me, Dorothy"
He had caught her hands and held
them so she could not pick up her worl
again.
Listen to mel" he persisted ~ love
you. If you will only marry me, yor
shall nevor be forced to do any thing
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1891-01-16
Tired of Drumsticks.

'What do chickens look like Mrs,
CodhooRer?" inquired the bank clerk OF
tho landlady, as he inspected the drum
stick on his plate.
"Are you in earnest, Mr.. Wanks?" she
asked.
Look something like centipedes,
don't they?" he continued, fretfully.
Certainly not. Haven't you ever
beon in tho country and seen the chick
ems scratching?"
We'll, yes, but I've drawn only legs
and pin-foathers for eleven months in
your house, and I've sort of lost shape
of the bird. N. Y. Tribune.
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1891-01-16
SHE WASN'T AFRAID.
A Farmers Wife Who Was Posted
the Habits of Angels.

Farmers Wife Who Was Posted on
the Habits of Angels.
One summer evening an old farmer sat
on his door step smoking pipe before
going to bed, says the Mifinburg Times.
Presentlya a tramp approached and said:
"Good evening, sir.
Good evening"" answered the farmer
81 have been walking long dis
tance," said the tramp, "and If you'll
permit me I'll sit a few minutes on your
door step"
"All right" was the answer.
The two men fell into conversation,
and as the farmer discovered his guest
to be an intelligent man, their talk was
continued until late hour.
Would you mind giving me mug of
cider?' asked the tramp, at length.
mot at all, said the farmer 81 will
do it with pleasure"
The cider was procured and disposed
of In summary fashion, and then came
the next request;
1--WE travelled good distance to-day,
allu ohOuiu llhC NOlI w lONe5O
with you, if you have no objection"
"All right" answered the farmer, II
can accommodate YOU"
Meanwhile the wife, who had long
before retired and was listening to the
conversation from her bedroom, called
out:
"No, you won't l won't have him
hero. Come husband, it's time for you
to come in and lock up"
Madam" said the tramp seriously
turning in the direction of the voice,
you should not speak so abruptly to a
stranger You might be entertaining
an angel unawares."
81 amt mite afraid" returned the
old lady, calmly, "angels don't come
around begging cider after dark"
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1891-01-16
ON A SUNDAY TRAIN.
Little Willie's Arguments Were Too L
zeal to BE Refuted,

Little Willie's Arguments Were Too Log
Ical to BE Refuted.
Willie-Mamma isn't it wicked for
us to ride on Sunday train?
Mamma-No, my son. We are on the
way TO church.
Its wicked to work on Sunday, isn't
it?"
"Certainly."
"Then it's wicked to run trains on
Sunday, isn't it. mammal"
81 presume so. Don't bother me, Will
lie"
"But it isn't wicked for us to ride on
emf"
FLUSH, Willie. Look at your lesson
paper"
"The men that run the trains can't GO
to church, can they?"
81 suppose not Quit talking, my
son."
"1hat's the reason why it's wicked
for them to run the trains, isn't it, nam.
map"
"It's work of necessity to run these
trains, Willie. Somebody has to do it
Now, don't talk any more"
"You wouldn't want me to work on
q Sunday train, would you, mammaP"
mo, my son."
"But it's all right for me to ride on one
isn't it?"
Don't talk any more, Willie"
81 won't"
Pause.
''Say, mamma amt 1t a good thing
don't have to work for a living? might
have to run on Sunday trains, yor
know, and that would bo wicked
wouldn't it?"
willie, you must hush"
"But there's nothing wicked in my
riding on em, is there?"
willie is lifted up and carried
squirming into the next car. Chicago
Tribune
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1891-01-16

j
her Cousin Dorothy, who was quietly
hemming the edge Of surah sash for
Thalia. "0nce heard you say that if
you were not married at thirty you
would take dose of laudanum."
Thalia laughed and tossed her pretty
head till her ostrich plumes danced
disdainfully. She thought there was
no danger of her being driven to vio-
lent death.
~ tell you what, Thalia" said Maud
Dare, looking up from her chocolates
and her novel, "you ought to make a
dead set at that Gordon man. They say
he is awfully rich-S5OO,OOO at least
and he owns that pretty yacht down the
inlet, too"
"The Myosotis?" said Thalia, with
growing animation. "Why, l didn't
know that. Who told you?'
"Oh, don't know" Maud replied,
carelessly. "You know, dear, since l
am engaged myself I don't pay much at
tention to these new men,"
"Who is that Mr.. Campbell?" Thalia
went on.
what Mr.. CampbellP The one who
was so sweet on Dorothy Oh, they say
he Is bank clerk somewhere He is a
friend of Mr.. Gordon's, you know. l
believe Gordon pays all his bills"
~ don't believe It'll" said Dorothy,
with sudden animation. He is not
that kind Of man at all. Idon't know
him very we'll, but am sure he is too
manly fellow TOTO"
Thalia burst out laughing and Doro-
thy paused.
Dorothy, my DEAR" she said, in a
patronizing way, don't 60 and fall in
love with a bank clerk, now-please
don't! should think you'd had enough
of poverty in all these years that you
have had to teach and sew and struggle
along. For PHYS sake"
II shall marry man whom can love,
no matter what his circumstances are, {"
said Dorothy, firmly.
''Be still, both of your Maud inter-
rupted, changing her pose. Here comes
Mr. Gordon now"
Dorothy gathered up her work hastily
and went into the house.
Thalia's face was wreathed with
smiles.
$50 glad to see you, Mr.. Gordon" she
said, sweetly. "We were getting SO
horribly dull! You have just come in
time to cheer us up"
Dorothy tossed her work into the bas-
ket under the window, seized her hat
and went out the back door
'Thalia will drive me frantic" she
said, as she dashed across the meadows
down to the strand "Oh, If were only
rich enough to refuse her patronage and
rid myself of this humiliating servitude.
Thalia treats me like her maid, and |
must bear it,"
"Why, Miss Floyd" some one ex'
claimed, at this moment. 81 was Just
going to hunt you up. The Myosotis is
up at the landing. Won't you take q
little sail with me?"
Dorothy stopped in confusion. Some
one with fine brown face and rather
stubborn dark hair that grew straight
up from a high smooth forehead was
smiling at her in the bright morning
sunlight.
''Oh, Mr. Campbelll" she began, and
stopped.
"You are out of sorts, aren't you?" he
said, easily. "Well, so am l. 1t will dC
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1891-01-16

WAS JUST dOlNd III HUM hOO
us good to have sail this morning. 1
, feel as though l wanted to get away
m every body-every body except
l." he added. softly.
= IsMr. Gordon going, and Thalia and
and all the rest?" Dorothy said, du-
biously,
mo, indeedl" he said, with empha.
sis. II want you, and nobody else.
Will you go?"
Dorothy assented gladly. 1t was just
what she wanted, She wondered how
Mr.. Campbell took the liberty of run
ming off with the Myosotis-but it was
too delightful to puzzle over, and she
gave herself up to the pleasure of it
Nov, l want you to tell me some
thing" said Campbell, as they went
skimming over the water together.
"Where is it that | have seen you be-
fore we met hero at Miss Doane's? l
feel as though | had known you for
years"
II don't know. l used to teach, you
know. l was governess at Miss Law
toms before l came to Miss Doanes =
Mrs. Clarence Eawton, you know"
My sisterS!" he cried. IL knew |
had seen you somewhere, Miss Floyd,
Ihope you are going to be friend OF
mine"
"Do you believe in friendship" she
asked, idly.
And the Myosotis soudded along, quite
unmindful Of them beth
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1891-01-16

you don't like. Speak to me, Dorothy.
You can care for me little-just lit
tie, can't you? Oh, Dorothy, if you
knew how much love you, you would
not turn away from me-"
Dorothy lifted her shy face and
smiled at him.
"You-you won't give me chance to
blush" she said, with a forced laugh, by
which she tried to hide her excitement.
mol" he said, drawing her toward
him. Dorothy, speak quickly. Is it
joy or woe that is in store for me?"
"You may change your mind" she
said, with a touch of roguery, "after
we are married"
Campbell caught her in his arms.
Dorothy" he said, ioyously, tell me
in plain English that you love me a lit.
tie"
mot little, she whispered" very
great deal. "
The bow of the Myosotis was grating
on the sand.
"Don'tF' Dorothy cried, "There are
Thalia and Mr.. Gordon"
Campbell scowled at the intruders.
Don't speak," he said, in a low tone.
"They haven't seen us"
Thalia went up the beach, leaning
lovingly on Gordon's arm.
Whom Dorothy came in, rather late to
luncheon, she was lying in her room,
crying Historically.
What on earth is the matter with
Thalia?" cried Dorothy, who had tried
to get into her cousins room and had
failed.
Maud Dare was eating olives and
drinking coffee in the morning-room.
"Oh," she said, in a disgusted tone,
'Thalia has made fool of herself! She
and Mr.. Gordon went over to the village
this morning and they were married
there"
We'll" said Dorothy, with a curl Of
the lip, wasn't that what Thalis
wanted?"
"Well, you see," said Maud slowly
''she has married the wrong man. II
appears that people have got Mr. Cor.
don's affairs rather mixed up. 1t ar.
pears that he is only bank clerk. He
isn't rich at all, and-and the Myosotis
belongs ~ Mr. Campbell"
''Oh!" was all Dorothy had to say.
She did not dare tell of her own en-
gagement.
Thalia went home that afternoon
abusing her cousin fearfully
"You knew it all along!" she cried,
passionately. THAT is why you were
so sweet on Mr.. Campbell! l don't see
how any one could be so deceitful"
Dorothy went to her lover in great
trouble.
"Why didn't you tell me?" she said
pitifully.
II didn't think it made any differ
ence to you, darling, whether l was rich
or poor
THAT is true" she admitted. III
didn't But Thalia is so angry"
'Never mind Thalia," said Campbell,
''Dorothy,we will be married right away
and we will take our wedding trip in
the Myosotis. No; don't refuse me-
love. Why should we waltz You DOM
want trousseau for a yachting trip
besides, you can buy it afterward iust
as well as before, and if you will con.
sent dearest you shall have my check.
book as long as you like"
Dorothy hesitated and was lost Two
days later the Myosotis put to sea with
the owner and his bride.
We'll, upon my word" said Maud
Dare, and went on caring Chocolates
Saturday Night
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1891-01-16

Teacher Ito now pupil.-What is
your last name, my little man? New
pupil-Tommy Teacher-What is your
full name? New pupil-Tommy Jones
Teacher-Then Jones is your last name?
Tommy-No, it isn't When was born
my name was Jones, and they didn't
give me the other one ;or a month after,
ward, London Public Opinion