New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1891-11-29
" WE ARE FROM NETWORK
A WINTER RESORT FARCE.
SCENE I.

Mrs. P.--Well, we're here at last, though NUS
say l dent see what there is about Florida TO make
such fuss about. But then. coming from New-fork'
We can't be expected to 60 into raptures over any other
place. People from other places always look so
countrl6ed Did you look the register, Magnus,
TO see II there are any New Workers In the hotel
Mae-Yes, my dear, and am afraid there are none
but ourselves.
Mrs. P.-Ch. horrorsi Let us leave after break
fast I never could endure a place where there are
no NEWCOMERS
Mag (slylyl-we, dear, there have been some places
you couldn't endure because there were NewYorkers.
Mis-. P.-Nonsense Magnus, you know what Tean.
OF course there are low people in NewYork recently
come from the country whom wouldn't know under
any circumstances. They try to pass of as old in
habitants by putting outward veneer OF man.
ner and style. But they can't deceive me- can tell
them at glance docking around the room through
a quizzing glass, with all air Of superior insolvency
New Workers. always show that they know they are
from New York, and outsiders can't Initiate u.s. (Dl-
rectng her gaze on q quiet, wellmannered, mas
sumng lady and gentleman at the next table and rails
ing her voice for their beneft.l Why, Magnus, there
are those country. looking people who came down on
the train with u.s. should have thought from their
looks that they would have gone to a secondclass
house. But suppose the poor creatures wanted to
get near swell people for once In their lives. How
easy it is to see they not from New-York! Such
atrocious dressing And such democratic manners!
Why they were positively cordial to everybody on the
train, including the porter. And in the bus he got
up and gave his seat to fat old negroes. oh, no,
they are not from Yew-York: Did you happen to
notice who they are and where they are irons
Mag (evidently distressed by his wfes nsolence and
loud tores)-Not loud my dear. Don't you know
1t is very bad form to talk at people' Their name
was hlotted and so couldn't make 1t out, but they
come from Ilohokus, N. ].
Mrs. P.-Never mind their Names then. It's enough
to know where they come from. How such country
pumpkins can have the face to come to frstclass
hotel Is past my comprehension Where do you sup
pose they get their money! presume however, they
sarve themselves the rest Of the year in order to get
a little outing. / knew she wasn't lady when saw
how dcferentiay she talked tO that ridiculous con-
sum,.tive schoolmam on the train. People who are
used to low society always think everybody they meet
as good as they are, il not better
Mag fdespairingyl-well, dear. let's make the best
Of whatever place in. Here's breakfast
Mrs p (glancing critically at the breakfast and ap-
parently uncertain what line to take in regard TO
it)-walter what is your name7
wait0r-Dey gnrally calls me S'nacRrb, maam
Mrs p (majestically)-I shall call you Snack. DO
you know your French chef has ever been employed
in New-Yorkl
Tallahassee way.
from her)-I knew it: knew IL the moment set eyes
on this stuf. Magnus. we certainly can't remain here.
No one from New York and cook from up Tallahassee
way Snack take this breakfast right back and tell
the cook Il is not ht to eat lie will understand
when you say that we are from New York. and arc
used to the best Take it right back, and say that II
he can't do better shall at the proprietor.
Mr.. p. who being hungry is aghast at the removal
Of the really excellent breakfast-My dear, you
really going too far So far as could there was
nothing the matter with the breakfast Those Hohokus
people ordered the same breakfast and seem to be
enjoying it very much.
Mrs. P.-Magnus, You don't understand the re-
fnements Of life. Even IL the breakfast was
all right, you say, which IL wasn't, /
did right in sending it back. for it will i'm
press on the people here the fact that are from
New-YOrk and can't be imposed upon. All the swell
people in New-York mako fuss over things even
when they are all right Just to show that they know
what's what 1t is an English Idea. inspecting an
other breakfast, which Snack has Just brouglt) All
that is better. knew II would do some good to tell
them that we are from NewYork You see, Magnus
was right. This breakfast Is really decent.
Snack (asde)-Golly she am a corlier: but dun got
de best oh her. brought back ezaly de same brekfus
she sent away He, he, hel
Mrs. P-Remember, Magnus, we are not to mlngle
with any CT the people here They are not from New
York, and one must be careful
many New-Yorkes about whom should be very care
full. You must learn to take people as they are.
dare say you would find those ohokus people pleasant
enough, and III be darned IL snub them for any
Mrs. P-Magnus, how can You Would you have
me put myself on a level with villagers who PERTAINS
keep country store ? II speak to that woman at
all. 1t will be simply to show her who am and show
her how lady from New York holds herself
Mag (under his breath)-Confound New-York
SCENE II.
ION the piazza Of the hotel-Sitting around Is tho
motley collection of Northern people usually
found In Florida during the Gmpses OF
"Crackers' here and there Uncle CeI,has Dbble OF
Maine, is telling old Rubadub, Of Rubadubyille
Ohio, what great State Florida would have been II
Maine men had settled It, Mrs. Copestone, OF Phila-
depha Is telling group OF ladies scrappie may be
made In eleven different ways. Various ladies' each
wearing shawl, are swapping diseases. q pastme from
which they seem to derive great comfort Professor
Dormouse. Of Boston, is impressns upon the Rev. Rich
man Charmer two facts, first that the Rev Joseph Cook
is not omnscient he tsed tn be, owing TO the cir
cumstance that he knows more, and secondly that the
present religious revolution originated in Boston inst
after Professor Dormouscs book myths Morallty'
appeared The consumptve schooma'am is trying TO
feed happy by forgetting that she money enough 10
remain just two weeks in Florida. Mrs. PunbaIl AMI
Mrs Hohohus are sitting together. The former lady
starts the conversation being careful to remind Mrs
Hohokus in multitude OF little ways that there is a
social gulf fixed between them all of which appears
10 anoru MIS- hohohus CONSIDERABLE quiet amusement
Mr.. Punball and Mr. Hohokus smoking and chatting
together amicably enough, at some little dstance)
Mrs. P.-Yes. presume IL must be horribly dull In
a little place like HohOkus i simply couldn't stand
IL; but then Pm from York, you know. OF
course, 1t is different with those who have never
known anything better. Mr.. Puftall sometimes
talks about going TO live In the country But tell
him it Will be time enough to think of that when we
have lost all money. l suppose you manage to
run in to the city once In a whllel Have You ever
attended the operai 1t seems to me saw you one
evening in orchestra chair the door. Our box
being on the side, commands good view of the
orchestra. And you have idea what fun Il Is to
watch the rabbc down there, who come to hear the
music and hiss at us II we say word. Have you
ever been In Florida beforel
Mrs. H.-ies, We ran down to the Ponce for a short
time last winter But | think like a nniefer and