Bismarck weekly tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1884-1943, 1891-06-12

2Dcu DuIleT Will Ue 10 OIL MS next OlrCn-
,day. On the principle of "never too old to
learn" he may become one of the possibili-
ties of the peoples party for president.
Respect for old age ought to make some
impression on the cartoon fends.
The resolutions as finally adopted by the |
Detroit conference prohibits christians
from playing games that cannot be partici-
pated in in Gods NAME. Gods name is al
ready too freely used in connection with
games.
1t is said that church rows have become
so fashionable that even the Quakers are
quietly arguing points of belief.
1t is now claimed by the churches that
the next time Bob lngersoll lectures in
Minneapolis he will have to be under con-
tract to say nothing about religion.
Whether this insinuation is for Bob or
christianity is yet undecided.
The peoples party much resembles the
whale that swallowed Jonah, and the DEM
'ocratic party is the Jonah. Just how long
they will be able to keep the burden inside
depends to a certain extent on the number
of silver letters Cleveland writes.
The Grand Forks Herald is not trying to
bulldoze Governor Burke. 1t is only mad
because he won't do as it wants him to.
Schweinfurth, the second Messiah. over
whom the star of Bethlehem refused to
rise, escaped a coat of tar and feathers in
Kansas City, through police protection. 1t
is such protection that leads to scenes of
the New Orleans nature. This imposter is
conducting an institution contrary to both
~ laws of God and man. Innocent girls
daily fall and sink beneath his power. yet,
under the veil of religion, this disgrace is
permitted,
A frail lad of Is is now in Jail at Omaha
charged with tampering with the United
States mail. He concealed a letter sent to
his mother by a would-be lover during the
absence of his father. The law is power
full, but the jury should return a verdict
like unto the one defending the girl who
shot her betrayer. The child placed him
self in peril to save his mothers honor
which would bring disgrace to his little
sister. The human brute who sent the
letter should be put on the seventeenth
gridiron of purgatory and fried to a brown.
The man who will destroy home happiness
is beneath the reptile.
. The latest fad for the American girl is
health. For once the young American
says amen.
A clock III Battle Creek, Mich, has run
or 100 years. During all this time it has
coupled one place in the parlor.
A priest in Chicago has refused to chris
ten a child Garfield because the great
statesman died without the proper religi-
Gus performances. This is in line with
the other christian acts of the present
day.
Now that the Delaware peach crop is out
of danger sensational papers have begun
to raise the price Of oysters.
While Quay is saying sweet thingslaboYt
.Clarkson as a possible presidential candi-
date r. @. Mills does not forget to get in a
good word for the democratic party and
himself.
Ex-senator ingalls, has begun a series of
articles on heresies and false doctrines.
Now if Bob lngersoll would only begin to
talk tariff the people would soon find out
how little these men really know.
At Danville, ILL.,, two prominent church
members undertook to lick an editor be-
cause he published the fact that an opera
was to be given under the auspices of the
church, in which the girls would appear in
short skirts. 1t is needless to remark that
the editor thrashed them both and also
that a more full account of the short skirts
will appear in the next issue.
1t is all a matter Of taste. You nave DR..
Briggs on heresy, the Charleston and TIA
ia, the base ball games or the Prince of
Wales scandal to choose from.
The latest definition of a kiss is a report
at headquarters.
"ShaIl women woo ?" is the title of an
article in Kate Fields Washington. That
depends Oh whether she is asked to or not.
The Minneapolis and st. Paul papers all
had a little special yesterday to the effect
that the Grand Forks Herald is roasting
Governor Burke. Some one ought to in
form the governor so that he may appreci-
ate the Herald's efforts.
~
Now that we have got the Itata we do
not know what to do with her.
A young lady in Massachusetts was re-
Gently attacked with a serious case of grip.
She apparently fell asleep and remained so
for fifteen days. On awaking she said she
had been to heaven, and told about the en-
joyments to be had in that beautiful land.
aShe could name the most popular summer
resorts, but positively refused to tell which