St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1891-03-02
DR.. BURRELL'S SATIRE
It Is Directed at the Catholic
Doctrine Of Extreme
Unction.
Runge Has Returned, But He
Doesn't Say Much About
the Fire.
Meagher Explains His Reel
procity Speeches and War
Is Avepted.
A Child Spiritualistic Lectur-
eP--Echoes From YeSter-
days Sermons.

When Rev. d. j. Burrell stepped into
his pulpit last evening, he was clothed
in garb of satirical cut. He had, in adj
dition, large roll of satire concealed
beneath his Prince Albert coat, which
he opened in full view of the congrega-
ton. Not always of the stiletto-like
quality was his satire he didn't hesitate
TO WELD bludgeon where it would be
most Scarifying. All this came out in
the good doctors prelude to the
regular Sunday evening sermon.
His barbed shafts were meant to be con-
cealed under the seemingly innocent
title of Extreme Unction for the Prot
eStant Church" This is substantially
what the doctor said:
There is good in all things, even III
PapiStry. We can hate everything too
much except sin. Why should we dis
card the cross as an emblem of faith
because it surmOunts St. Peters at
Rome? Or why should we deny COM
fort TO the dying soul because it is part
of the rites of a sect to which we are
opposed?
This much of preface is necessary
before coming to the arguments as to
why extreme JUNCTION should be adopted
by the Protestant church. Oil has al
ways been used in religious ceremonies.
It's use formed an important part of the
LeVltical economy. Admitting that
there is no Biblical authority for anoint-
ing, may we not yet accept it because Of
its convenience? What a blessing it
would be to ministers. Ser
mon preparation is exceeding
ly laborious. Why should we
go to all this trouble when bottle of
oil Is all that is necessary? A minister
might leave with every family his card,
bearing theseinstructions: "Send for
me and my vial at any time of the day
or night when needed" Thus could be
done away with sermons, houses of
worship and all the machinery of re-
ligious teacding. And what help the
bottle OF oil would be to missionaries.
Think OF AdOniram JudSOn tOiling for
weeks and months for one conversion,
when, had he the Oil. he could have
rested until the last moment and then
insured the conversion of the pagan.
What Il world of labor and of trials
WOuld have been saved to st. Paul had
he the bottle of oil.
Then consider the convenience of
TINS plan OF extreme JUNCTION to the sin
ner. Right living. open confession,
cross bearing. would all be done away
with. The epicure could pamper his
tastes to the utmost, the business man
could go on with his mOney-getting, re-
CARELESS of religion, conscious that he
would be saved at the last through eX-
IRENE JUNCTION. Then, 20 guard against
sudden death. ETC., JUNCTION insurance
companies could be formed. Ministers
could guarantee prompt and accurate
service on demand. We might carry
this further. Every man might carry
his own oil with him. Each family
might be provided with its private bot
tie. No man need die in doubt as to his
future. for, with the oil on his forehead,
all his sins would be wiped away.
"Then think how at the mercy of all
good Christians would be the incOrrig-
IDLY wicked. They would be saved,
nOlenS yOienS. All we would have to do
would be to wait until the moment of
Inconsistencies, and then, with the
wafer and the oil, we could land them
safely III heavenin spite of themselves. .
The old prayer method would yield to
oil.
There would be one danger in the
adoption of this plan. Sinners might
organize. They might invent an unc-
ton alarm similar to the present burg
lar alarm, which would either wake the
victim of threatened Sanctification or
kill the bearer of the holy Oil. What
a dangerous instrument such would
have been in the hands Of the late Gen.
Sherman, added to his hatred of priests
and tlummery.
Extreme JUNCTION, the bottle of oil. if
adopted by the Protestant church, will
furnish a guard against offense to the
cross. 1t will become the grand trunk
line to Heaven, running solid vestibuled
trains. When SO much can be said for
it, let US, by all means, have it."