News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1891-03-12
ALY BABOON BEDFELLOW

1t has been said by the wise man of
old that there is no new thing under
the sun If this means that the ad-
venture l am about to relate was only
repetition of something that occurred
to some other hapless damsel in the
pre- historic ages l herewith accord her
my sincerest sympathies
The intelligent reader must be kind
enough to understand, asa preliminary,
that am impulsive, and apt to EN-
brace opinions with a degree of enthu-
siasIn and a total disregard of all ad-
verse arguments, however weighty,
that is truly feminine. When, there
fore. shortly after leaving school, /, as
my brother says, took up evolution,
and read various abstruse treatises upon
the development of species and the
descent of man," it wGs in no half
hearted manner Gha5 I rode my hobby,
but so Thoroughly tHat I became a
thorn in the q tsh to most of my rcla-
tiors and eTiea sas,ez =, 7 -,-4sr ssSsl.J0l5oy
brothers, denoJAcing the theory laconi-
cally, but tOrcibly, as aWIul DOSn,
bestowed upon me the contemptuous
appellation of thI'.baooon, and made
unkind allusions to my frequent visits
to the Regents Park gardens as being
paid to next of kin"
Certainly l did resort often, almost
every day, to the monkey house to
study the attributes of its interesting
occupants. Perhaps some lingering
infatuated idea possessed me that it
might be my brilliant mission to dis
cover the missing link" at any rate,
my notebook of that period contains
many finely worded desires to watch
the agile monkey in its native habitat"
and to trace the simian likeness to the
human amid the primeval forests of
another hemisphere"
At length was enabled to partially
fulfill my dreams.
Having received a warm invitation
from an old school friend to spend
some weeks with her at her home in
the west of Ireland, l started, with my
maid as escort, for Ballynaghader
ried three years before an Irish gentle
man of some property, and l had never
seen either her husband or herself
since her marriage, SO that it was with
delightful anticipatiOns of renewing an
old friendship and forming a new one
that | set out on my journey. My
brothers accompanied me to the sta
ton, and sped me on my way with a
unanimous wish that l might meet a
gorilla or a chimpanzee while taking
my walks abroad in what they per
sisted in calling the ''wilds."
My maid, Hannah, was an estimable
woman, very much privileged by req
son of her long and faithful service,
and as we neared our destination after
long and fatiguing journey, the de-
tails of which would be as tiresOme as
unnecessary, became overwhelmed with
dismay, falling into tears, alleging be-
tween her sobs that p G.. b. 1872 had
told her the day before we started that
Ireland was a country where nobody
cared for the police.
lILS WIS, III LAetiiAiSbiA .
eyes, the climax of barbarism; and
when she proceeded to state from in
formation received"-presumably from
the same reliable source-''that being
murdered in ones bed" was considered
in Ireland quite an ordinary and peace
full way of departing this life, L felt
that it behooved me to assert myself,
and finding all soothing arguments OF
no avail administered a sharp scold-
ing, which had the desired effect, and
induced my abigail to dry her eyes,
while she ''hoped, with an incredulous
snort and dcsponiing shake of her
head, that things would turn out bet
ter than she expected"
The prospective pleasure of my visit
was largely enhanced by the discovery
chat Mr.. Ardagh, whom | liked directly
saw him, was q great lover and stu
dent of zoology, and had quite menag-
erie Of tame and wild animals, to which
he was constantly adding interesting
specimens | promised myself great
pleasure in inspecting the animals and
cultivating their acquaintance on the
morrow, but was recalled from my
plcasurable anticipations to devote all
my attention to an account Marian was
giving me of the mysterious loss of q
very handsome and much valued brace
let which had occurred that very day.
Some hours before my arrival her
maid had informed her that this brace
let, which had been recently under re-
pair and had been returned that morn
ing from the jewelor, was missing. 1t
had been laid carclessly on the dressing
table when it arrived, and had disap-
peared. Search had been made in
every likely and unlikely spot, servants
had been questioned, and, as usual