The Sunday morning news., 1891-06-07

or pronouHces against him. however, it is
a social stigma which 1t is hard to wipe
out. A young man should lose no oDpor~
tunity OF improving himself There is
line instruction in works of art. He
should read and study in his leisure hours
and frequent picture galleries and
museums a young man becomes the
most agreeable Of companions If he brings
u keen, fresh Intelligence, refued tastes
and q desire to be agreeable into society.
Success In society is like electricity. lt
makes itself felt and is yet unseen and
indescribable. There is such a thing as
an absurd success with little merit behind
it. But we generally find that men have
worked very hard for this sort of success.
It is nice thing ii man has some ac-
complishment. such as music or pleas
ant trick of elocution, and to be a good
dancer is almost Indispensable Yet a
man gets on without any OF these.
In addressing a note to a lady whom he
does not know well, Tilden should use the
third person as follows:
"Mr Tilden presents his compliments
to Mrs. Montgomery, and begs to know il
she and Miss Montgomery will honor him
with their company at theatre party on
the evening of April at the Chestnut
Street Theatre. r. S. v. p. III South
Market place."
This note should be sealed with wax,
impressed with the writer's coat-Of-arms
or some favorite device and delivered by
a private messenger, who should wait for
an answer. In addressing letter to a
gentleman the full title should be used:
Walter Tilden, Esq. y or, first name not
known, g." Tilden. ESQ., never HMr.
Walter Tilden. II IL be an in IMITATION 1t
is not etiquette to say Mister In writ
ing In the first person Tiiden must not be
too familiar He must make no ellis
ions or contractions, but fill out every
word and line, as If it were q pleasure.
At pail a young man can ask friend
to present him to a lady who is chaperon-
ing a young girl, and through her he can
be presented to the young girl. No man
should, however, introduce another man
without permission. IL he is presented
and asks the girl to dance, q short walk is
permitted before he returns his partner to
the side of the chaperon- But 1t as bad
manners for the young. couple to disap-
pear for long time. No man should 20
into supper room alone or help himself
while ladies remain unhelped.
GETTING ON IN SOCIETY.
"To get on in society involves so much
thar can never be written down, that any
manual is, of course, imperfect. for no
one can predict who shall succeed and
who shall fail. Bold and arrogant people,
cheeky" people, succeed at first, modest
ones In the long run. 1t Is a melancholy
fact that the most Objectionable people do
get into fashionable society. II is to be
feared that the possession of wealth is
more desired than the possession Of any
other attribute, that much is forgiven the
rich man which would be rank neresy to
the poor one.
We would not, however, advise Tilden
to choose his friends from the worldly
point, simply, either of fashion or wealth.
He should try to find those who are well
bred, good, true. honorable aud generous.
Wherever they are, such people are al
In the ranks of society we find some
times the ideal gentleman. Society may
not have produced so good a crop as It
should have done, yet its false aims, its
giittering ffiezes. have NOT yet dazzled all
men ont of the true, the ideal. breeding.
There are many clubs, but there are some
Admirable Crichtons-men who can
think. read, study, work and still be
fashionable.
A man should go through the fierce
fires of social competition and yet not be
seorcned. All men have not had tina. fine
repressive training which makes our
navy and army men such gentlemen.
The breeding OF the young men of fashion
is not what their grandfathers would
have called good Tney sometime have a
severe and bored expression when called
on to give up a selfish pleasure. One asks,
''Where are their mannersW
Breeding, cultivation. manners, must
start from the heart. They must be fos-
tered and the dancing master added on
The old saying that it takes three genera
tions to make a gentleman, makes us ask
how many does it take to unmake one? 4?
Some young and well born men seem to
be undoing the work of the three genera
tions, and to have inherited nothing of a
great ancestor but his bad manners, a
poor inheritance.
An American young man should have
the best manners. He has had nothing
to crush him; he is unacquainted with
patronage, which In its way makes snobs,
and no one loves a snob, least of all the
man whom the snob cultivates. The
word gentleman" although one of the
best in the language should not be used
TOO much. Be gentleman, but talk
about man" And man avoids dis
play and cultivates simplicity, neatness
and fitness of things. if he is both man
and a gentleman.
EVENTS OF THE WEFK.