The Newberry herald and news. (Newberry, S.C.) 1884-1903, 1891-10-08
A Tale Of Copjugal Infelicity in the Penn
sylvania Backwoods.

stiff gaite" asked the anxious woods
man.
ayes, he was, come to think of it," I
replied.
''Seem ez if he were goin' to git thar
Gid he?" said the lumbermau.
''Get where?" I asked.
''To Geetown."
''Tbere's'no doubt about it" l said.
''Were tina woman with him, did
y'notice?" asked the man.
''Yes, there was," replied.
"Cross-eyed?" questioned the woods
man.
81 don't know about that
''Mole Oh her nose?"
stThat's more than can say"
sWere the mule lame in the eff hind
leg?"
II think he was"
'sDidn't notice whittier the woman
were cross eyed, hey?"
s'No.n
"Did the m1n have yaller balrd?'
"Yes; a long, yellow beard"
"From w'athttle y see O. the woman,
dye think tha were room enough on
her nose for a good-sized mole?"
"Well, yes, think there was"
'sDid the mule wheeze consid'able as
he spun by y'?"
she acted to me as If he might have
touch of the heaves; yes"
couldn't sw'ar the woman WANT
cross-eyed, could y':''
ssNo."
blackboard kind o'rattly in the
spokes, an actin ez if a pint or two O.
grease wouldn't hurt it?'
1T seemed that way"
"Woman hev on blue dress'n
green hat with red feather in it?''
81 remember the green hat with
red feather"
''Were tha gap IN the buckboard's
dash, sumpin' like ez if mules heels
mowt'a' gone through it some time or
other?"
"Yes, there was hole IN the DASH"
"But y hain't dead sartin th't tina
were mole on the woman's nose?"
"No."
'Tha hain't no doubt, though, but
wat they was goin' to git thar?"
''Not particle.n
"Man in his shirt sleeves an one
gauus?"
"Yes, remember that he was in his
shirt sleeves and wore but one suspen-
der"
The aaxious woodsman paused as if
trying to think of something else to
ask, but at last said:
"Y'll hef to 'scuse me stranger fer
bein' so kinder curious, but mebbe y
mow't know who them folks be?"
ssIhaven't the least idea"
"Wull, the mule m the woman m
the blackboard is mine. The man is
Sim Bilger. He's slopin' with the wo-
man, IN it's jist my durn luck to be
too late to ketch 'em, fer they've took
the keers at Geetown afore this!"
"What! The woman your wifen'
"Coursew
"Well," said L, sit don't seem to me
that would go 20 much trouble to
fetch such a woman back"
"Fetch her back! Great hoop-pole! I
hain't arter her to fetch her backw
"What were you in such hot pursuit
of her for, then?'
"WulI, it's this here way. Time she
sloped with Bill Balls, year ago las
spring, she kim back two or three
weeks arterw'Gs m said she'd fergot
some of her duds, m she'd kim back
to git 'em. tor her whar she KID find
'em, but she jist settled down to hum
ag'in m were bossin' the clearin' same
ez afore, in less'n half an hour. She
run things fer spell, m then sloped
with Sam Fletcher, the mule boss.
'Twa'nt long fore she diskivered th't
she'd fergot to take sumpin' else O
her'n, mt she kim back to git it, m
first thing I know'd I were workin'
fer her agin. Las fall she cut sticks N
dug out with Joe Fassett.
"'GoshD I says. 4 hope Samanthy's
mem'ry hain't ben bad this timen I
says. If she's fergot anythin' this trip
I mow't ez well move outr
"But sure eZ sap she'd ben fergitful
again, m twan't three weeks fore she
kim prancin' back hum arter suapin'
she'd left ahind her, N mem her went
to workin' in harness ag'in. Now along
comes Sim Bilger, n Samanthy puts
on her bes' bib m tucker m slopes with
him, N Pm too durn late to ketch
'emm
"Let 'em gor I said. ,"What do you
wantto waste your time chasing up
such cattle for?"
Let 'em gow exclaimed the anxious
husband. "Course I'll let 'em go! But
here's lot O. things in this here bundle
th't Samanthy's fergot. Wat l wanted
were to overhaul her m give mto her
so she wouldn't hef to come back arter
'em! Now she'll member 'em in
week or two, m eonsarn it, she'll come
home hummin'. It's just my durn
luck"
And the disappointed husband turned
his horse about and galloped disconso-
lately away.
Always After Him.