The record-union., 1891-01-11
Miss Susie a Victim of the Physi-
cal Culture Fad.
SHE HAS A ROUGH TIME. BUT
ENJOYS HERSELF.
How She Learned the ssFlying Rings''
Act-Sho Forgot to Bend Her Knees
and was Jeered-A Thrilling Feat
on the Ladder Mastered.

Miss Susie Blank is vivacious little
lady of Sacramento who caught the phys
cal culture fad.
Her friend, Miss Strongarm, had joined
the ladies' class of the Sacramento Ath-
letic Club some weeks previous, and her
much-expanded chest, straight back,
graceful carriage, healthy color, and cord
like muscles fairly set Miss Susie wild.
She would be an athlete, too.
Miss Susie took her first lesson the
other day. When she was ushered into
the gymnasium, in the old Pavilion, and
beheld the array of Indian clubs, dumb
bells, horizontal bars, trapeze, and count
less other muscle-making paraphernalia,
she clapped her hands and laughed with
glee over the prospective good times she
would have. But what took Miss Susie's
eye most was the score or more of ladies
in picturesque costumes, who were en-
gagged in the most extraordinary acrobatic
and gylnnatic featS our young and en-
thusiastic friend had ever seen-even
at boarding school. Some were flying
through the air, hanging to the big iron
rings, others were making desperate eff
forts to balance themselves on their
hands, some were juggling the Indian
clubs, and two OF them were actually
punching each other with the boxing
gloves. But for each feat she saw per-
formed Miss Susie made mental resolve
that she would soon do likewise.
Professor Godetroy cut short Miss Su-
sizes contemplations by ordering her to
divest herself Of all tight-titting garments
qncluding stays and get into regular
gymnasium rig, so she retired into the
dressing and, borrowing suit
from a Il participating member, soon
appeared quite as grotesque-looking as
very short full skirt, which allowed free
movement to all the members of her body
awaiting development.
The order was given, "Form in liner'
and all the flying figures came to earth
again and stood in an orderly row, the
tallest girl at the head and our Miss Susie
well down toward the foot. Then they
marched and countermarched, shuffled
their feet like the regular militia, fright
about faced" and went through regu
lar drill, III which the new scholar felt
rather uncomfortable, as she could scarce
ly tell her right foot from her left, or
which heel to turn upon, the orders came
so rapidly.
After that came the regular calisthenic
exercises, and Miss Susie waved her arms
and bobbed her head and knocked her
knees together until she felt like an
automaton, with just enough sense left to
wonder eagerly if the muscles were grow
ing any after all that hard work.
At any rate, She was in a delightful
glow, and the blood was tingling in her
veins when they got through that and
We're ordered to practice on the rings.''
Whatever that is, !" thought Miss Susie,
81 am in for it. and [ hope | won't break
any bones" She echoed the hope as she
saw each girl in turn go forward to
practice. The ring was suspended from
the ceiling, and about eight feet from the
ground. The exercise was to jump up,
catch hold of ii and swing first from side
to side, then backward and forward, then
round and round il a circle.
Those who were timid were hoisted up
by the Professor, the others Jumped up
themselves, but Miss Susie's heart failed
her as her time came. She looked first at
the ring, then at the floor, then at the Pro-
fessor, but he without any waste OF words
placed his hands ON her hips and said,
''Jump!" She made mild effort and
raised herself two inches from the
ground.
''We'H try it again." said the Professor,
kindly. bend your knees this time.1
She bent them double, made a spring
with his assistance, clutched wildly at the
ring, which eluded her grasp, and came
down with heavy thud that shook the
building.
Always bend your knees" said her in
structor, land that will make YOU come
down more lightly"
With a third and last effort Miss Susie
caught the ring and hung on to it like
grim death, shrieking to her supporter
not to let her go or she would surely fall;
but he did not notice the despairing an
peal, and calmly moved aside, leaving her
hanging up there, feeling as if her arms
would leave their sockets, her neck break
and other disagreeable things take place,
while the rest of the class were in one
broad grin at her misery. But the climax
was reached when the Professor told her
to swing, and started her with fine
shove that took her breath away. She
closed her eyes and gave herself up for
lost as she swung up almost to the ceiling
and came back again almost to the start
ing point. Then she begged to be taken
down.
Jump" said the Professor, .'and re-
member to bend your knees"
She said her prayers, shut her eyes
tight, and drew up her knees as high as
she could, then let go and came down. not
on her feet or knees either, but very
nearly ON her nose. She was picked up
and put on a bench to recuper;ite. while
the others went through their ''rine prac-
tice.''
Miss Susie thought she had had enough
OIL III Tor one cay.
Then they were ordered to march to the
ladder. '1f it is climbing" thought Miss
Susie, II can do it alreadyr' But it was
not climbing; just more jumping and
swinging. 1t was not very high from
the ground, so she acquitted herself well:
but The last exercise stumped her and
good many others, too. 1t was to lump
up to the highest round of the ladder in
reach, swing from side to side, and with
each swing move your hand one round
higher until you reach the top of the lad
der, then come down again any way You
can. The Professor did it beautifully.
but somehow the girls stuck fast. They
could not advance even one round, and
Miss Susie sat down on the lowest round
in perfect despair, hot and tired But
their patient instructor made the whole
class so over it again, and finally the tall
est one did manage, by dint of strenuous
exertlons, to slowly push herself up, inch
by inch, until she advanced about three
rounds; then she dropped, flushed, but
Miss Susie was fired with ambition.
and determined to try once more. She
caught at the ladder with both hands and.
suspended from it, worked her body like
a pump-handle, first this way, tnen that.
until every bone cracked again, and some
one said: ''She must be breaking!''
But the only result of all her kicking
was to raise large blister on each hand
and nearly dislocate her spine: so she.
too, dropped with more force than ele-
gance.
This concluded the exercises for tbe