Morning journal and courier. [volume] (New Haven [Conn.]) 1848-1894, 1891-06-27


sculptor; "I have retouched this part and
and brought out this muscle; have given
more expression to this lip and more en-
ergy to this limb" "Well, we'll" said his
friend; "all these are trifes" ,'iIt may be
80" replied the master, "but recollect that
trifes make perfection, and perfection is
no trif1e." HILARY.
MIR. wAKEMAN's JOUHNKYfNGs.
English and Scottish Inns-The
Landlord-Hew Your Luggage is
Grabbed-CoHee Rooms.
LONDON, England, June 16.
To the Editor Of the JOURNAL AND COURIER:
There are two classes of inns in Eng
land and Scotland in which the guests find
comfort. One class comprises the great
hotels of such cities as London, Liverpool,
Glasgow and Edinburgh, which have be-
come comfortable, during the past quarter
of a century, in proportion to their adop-7
ton of American hotel manners and i'm
provements. The other class is the hum
BILE and simple hotels of remote villages,
of almost unknown dales and glens, of
bonnie old Scotch clachans and of rose
embowered English hamlets, where one
thanks God, if he have come by design or
accident, for the tender repose and blest
rest to be found among them.
There is another class. Its inns are the
hotels the average traveller, commercial or
uncommercial, is compelled to patronize,
and which lay in wait for the doomed
tourist from Lands End to John O 'Groat's.
They are simply places where one for
necessary period resigns himself to captiv
ity, surveillance and extortion. The un-
feigned and tremendous surprise and in.
dignation evinced at protest against either
are elements of humor in the situation, if
those may exist where there seems only
opportunity for downright despair.
The effusiveness of your welcome at
| one of these inns is alarming. The next
| instant you have cause for alarm, for with
| queen's-warrant you could not find q
shred of that gaumy, greasy, gaseous well
| come. From dozen to a score of grin
ming, jumping, wriggling, vociferous be-
ings grab and gasp and gurgle at you un-
| til you are inside the door and outside the
law, and your belongings have been
wrenched from you, and yourself left as
lone as is silence between the stars. Then
if you find theh, or anybody that, with
out ransom, will acknowledge to having
ever before seen them or you in that
blessed inn, you possess genius and great
brave and patient soul.
If you have come to the inn by carriage
and been mulcted by the station porterf
for bringing your baggage to the door. by
other porters who grab it and carry it te
some other place, by other porters who
now seize it and deposit it near your car
riage, and by still other portera who assist
the scornful coach1nan in getting things
to rights and under way; or if you have
walked and carried a portmanteau or two
and been haunted and taunted by street
porters and urchins for your niggardnes
and efforts to destroy the customs of tn
country; you will find them all there
these Shiny, slippery human tentacles O
, the concrete British inn devil-fish, separat
and distinct notifications of the life-bloot
sappings you will be called upon in spiri
and pocket to endure.
There is the landlord, riotous in obse
quiousness the landlady beaming witt
smiles, but measuring your capacity fo
, imposition with unerring accuracy; tn
head waiter, a superior foreign being, usu
ally German-French adventurer in ful
. dress, who performs all Offices with scorr
but now standing there with bland pc,
instability in his face for your comm
trial; the porter and the second porter
who grin at you this once to ever afte
. grind; "boots," that sodden, grimy slav
who never sleeps and who is ever at wa
Q with all other souls within the place
"buttons," in uniform as to clothing, BIT
in permanent gloom as to face, save whe
you arrive and he lights up with joy at tt
misery he alone can cause you; a half do
g en- odorous stablemen, who each watc
8 their chance to leer and pull their for
locks at you in effort to establish seer
recognition of what you may expect if yo
!, | do not placate them; the bar maid WI
i knows, you know, that it is she alone WI
10 supplies the awful voluminousness an
!, minuteness of that inevitable bill, an
t. who giggles and gyrates as she sees yol
;e own writhing recognition of what is
q come; and a number of muscular catt
d called chambermaids, who in trice ha'
r | settled the manner in which you shall
o racked and wrecked within the precinc
d of the dank, clammy den to which ye
D. are certain to be consigned.
X LII d luOuGuG Uuo COlu IcdilSu VI yO
If situation has come. You are inside a 10,
le dark, narrow hall and alone At one si'
ID is the bar, an affair constructed like
N American railway-station news-stan
h which is shut out from sight whenever t
t, bar-maid wishes to yawn, the landladv
L. sires to abuse her Boniface, or your ov
10 objurgations become too numerous and d
8. cisive. Opposite is the s'Coffee-Room, y
9, long, low, cheerless table, spread with
,g cloth ever decorated with misplaced ms
or ter. If you have the good fortune
I'd finally get anything to eat in the plat
n you will have to partake of it with
* blowsy tourist possessing one sofa,
ut drunken guest snoring upon another,
I'D crowd of drovers, of politicians or of
be constabulary or military, swigging ale
as stout beside you, and the whole room
blue as channel-fog with the smoke
ng tobacco. Directly you are in the prise
Is, like hall. The head waiter is gone; I
II In porter has grabbed your luggage and d
10 appeared; "boots" and ''buttons" hs
1t, vanished; landlord, landlady and BARN,
tn have been swallowed up in the inconcei,
,ts BILE somewhere behind the bar; stablem
'as and chamber1naids are whisked into I
ire discoverable retreats. Great, gloo,
est doors, black, mouldy walls, hard, forb
'h- ding ceilings, alone confront you. Y
bang your knuckles against the bar-w
7as dow. Landlord, landlady or bar-maid,
in and by appears, giving you look
cir panied surprise, and then disappea
on You call, "Porter!" - s'Boots!'' '-tsB
gle s!"-"Chambermaidl" There is
oh even reproving glance now in answ
ID You call and bang some more. This ii
gh echo alone reproves you. Cropping alb,
in the place, you snatch at bell-cord big
ese you wrist, with tassel as big as "
er- head. This you tug at very violent
BILE The clang and clamor of the bell, VIII
On, you cannot locate, fill the whole pla
ted The bar-window comes up with sis
nd goes down with slam, and an express
or, of disgust and dismay is caught escap
rue between the slams. Then, peering
lei from dark stairways, and peering out
md quickly-opened doors, are seen faces
DIS, Of grave surprise; you hear all about
eaf exclamations of disgust and dismay;
b a in another instant all these faces are &c
ork and you are again alone. Then you I
out loud to yourself for while in r
ups American words.
cen Strengthened, you return to the
life bell-cord. You jerk and jerk at Il