davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1891-03-14
j. TURNER
DEALER IN
General Merchandise

F10eV1uucs kDss
Has Just received y Large Stock Of Fall
and Winter Go"ds, which is to be sold at y
small margin above cost for cash.
The public are invited to call and exam
inc his large and we'll selected stock OF
DRY GOODS,
consisting of Dress Goods and Trimmings.
Fancy Goods, White Goods. adies' Gloaks
and Jackets. Jersies. Hosiery. Shawls and
Hoods, Balmorals. Jeans, Cassimeres aud
Flannels, Linseys. Blankets, etc
Mems and Boys Hats. and Ladies' Trim
med Hats.
A large stock of Boys and Menss CLO-
THING. Special bargains are offered in
Boys and Mems JEANS Clothing, which
were bought at a sacrifice.
A fine assortment Of Boots and Shoes.
Saddle,y, Crockery. Hardware, Groceries
Plantation supplies. TRUNKS. valises,
Towers celebrated "Fish Brand" of Slick
ers, and FURNITURE.
Agent for the Dupont Gun Powder, the
Oldest and best in America.
A carload of the celebrated MILBURN
WAGONS will he received eaily in Octo-
Der, the best on the planet.
Highest market price paid for Cotton,
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1891-03-14

Snug iissis fbrsunea have been made q
WORK for ~, by Anna Isev, Anttin-
rexss. and Jno. Bonn. Toledo. uhi'A
|ser crt- ofh<rs ere doing - we'll. Why
hot yous Some earn over SVo.W
.nonth. You can do the WORK and live
hi hcme, wherever you are Even be-
rinncrs are easily earuiuR iron - 70
ti0a dRv. An sFrs- We show 200 how
aud starr you. Gas work N >pers time
% aIl the time. Zig money for work-
era Fsiiure unknowu <yno1g thrsu-
xEW aud wouderfsl P.rti~ulers sfes-
/, Box eoE'seel0ud, mpine
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1891-03-14

"The art of putting right men
in the right places" Talleyrand
once said, sis first in the science OF
government, but that of finding
places for the discontinued is most
difficult"
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1891-03-14
mo. IS.


In all organized bodies of men a
large per cent of the business is
done BY q small per cent Of the
membership. A large majority of
intelligent men are slow thinkers.
They reach conclusion by q slow
process, but not the less surely and
judiciously on that account. When
such men are called upon to decide
questions which they have not fully
considered, they are apt to be led
by those who have or are supposed
to have matured and competent
convictions concerning the matter.
Here is where the demagogue gets
in his work. He is always glib
and plausible, and as his hearers
cannot on demand controvert his
positions, they are apt to consider
them incontrovertable. The result
is line of policy given out as the
matured convictions of the body,
when perhaps not one in ten has
reached any conclusion by process
of reasoning. Inasmuch as this
action bears the seal of the body
every person present and partici-
pating feels himself under some
sort of moral obligation to adhere,
even after deliberation has con-
WINGED him Of his error. Most
men also have q holy horror of
- ga 4 :. Il
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1891-03-14

The u. S. commission appointed
for the selection of the best point
on the Gulf coast for establishing
a naval dry dock, have reported in
favor of New Orleans, after giving
a full and impartial examination
of the claims advanced by Mobile,
Pensacola, Galveston and other
cities on the Gulf.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1891-03-14

The two months deadlock in the Hi
nois legislature was broken on the 18th
instant, by the election OF Gen. John M.
Palmer, Democrat, as U. s. Senator, the
Alliance men voting with the Democrats
for his election. Thus again the princi-
pies OF our grand old party triumph, by
the help of the Farmers Alliance, which
is fast realizing that all of the objects it
seeks to accomplish can be attained by
battling in Democratic ranks
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08
| will" Then they departed for the
squire's.-Free Press.
Famine in the Soudan.

At the time of our arrival March,
1890, the entire Soudan was under
going the horrors of famine of al
most unexampled severity. The
visitation extended over an immense
area, from the frontiers of Lower
Egypt in the north, down to Abyssinia
and SEMINAR in the south, and across
to Darfour in the west. Not a town
or district escaped, and such frag-
ments of news as appeared from time
to time in the English newspapers, so far
from exaggerating, fell short of rep
resenting the terrible reality. At
Suakin there were fully three thous-
and starving natives congregated out
side the city walls, and the scenes of
misery witnessed daily will not
readily be effaced from my mind.
Eleven people died the day of our ar
rival. Cats and dogs were devoured.
and dead bodies dug up for food, and
one heard terrible stories of the
murder of children by their famished
kinsfolk. Day by day the throng of
famine-stricken wretches augmented
in the numbers, attracted by the
news of the bread served out daily by
the Suakin Relief Committee and the
dhurra distributed by the Soudan
Trading Company.
Native reports agreed in describing
still more shocking state of affairs
in the interior. One of the company's
Arab traders, who had just returned
with a caravan from Berber and
Khartoum, gave us graphic account
of the scenes of desolation he had en-.
countered on his journey. The road
south of Berber. he said, was strewn
with human bones and skulls, and
the people were dying like flies. At
Metammeh, where, it will be remem.
bered, Sir Charles Wilson's force
fought a battle with the dervishes,
not soul was left. Khartoum was
full of widows and orphans, and
dhurra was selling at $50 a bag.
South of Khartoum things were not
nearly so bad.
He further expressed his opinion
that Mahdism was done for, and that
force Of one thousand men could
make a promenade through the
country. All the owners of the mills
were dead or gone-"Not a sound of
a water wheel to be heard throughout
the land" 1t is we'll known that the
Mahdists destroyed all the water
wheels, so as to force the owners to
join their ranks or else remain be-
hind and starve. This enlightened
policy, pursued for number of years
and over vast extent of country,
has contributed not little to reduce
the Arabs to their present wretched.
ness.-The Fortnightly Review.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08
Changes of Climate

XIII moro people than is known. Par
ticularly Is this the case In instances where
the constitution Is delicate, and among
our immigrant population seeking new
homes In those portions OF the west, and
where malarial and typhoid fevers prevail
at certain seasons Of the year. The best
preparative for change Of climate, or ol
diet and water which that change necessl
tates, Is Hostetters Stomach Bitters
which not only fortifies the system against
malaria, variable temperature, damp
and the debilitating effects Of tropical heat
but Is also the leading remedy for consti.
patton, dyspepsia, liver complaint, bodi.
ly troubles specially apt to attack emf.
grants and visitors to regions near the
equator, mariners and tourists. Wheth.
er used as a safeguard by sea voyagers,
travellers by land, minors, or of agricult-
uralists in newly populated districts, this
fine specific has elected the most favora-
BILE testimony.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08
Drew the Line at Ducks.

Sambo, the typical Sambo, joined
the church, and the shepherd of his
soul thought best to look after him.
"Have you stolen any chickens
Sambo, since you met with change
of heart 7" said the shepherd, one
day.
"No, massa oh, no, / hasn't stole
no chick'n tall"
"Any turkeys?' persisted the pas
tor.
"Ob, no, massa | hasn't took
nary turkey"
"Well, Sambo, l am glad to hear
livery glad. Watch and pray p
and the good man went on.
"Golly !" chuckled Sambo, peeping
inside his coat, "if he'd a sed
ducks he'd he'd me !'-Boston
Commonwealth.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

The race for fame does not always
go to the swift. The fastest man in
his class in Harvard twenty years age
is now in Wisconsin poorhouse.-
New York Recorder.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

"What did the poet mean when he
called this country the land of the
free and the home of the brave 7"
HE was probably referring to bache-
lors and married men," said old Mr..
Smithers, sadly.-Puck.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

Annie (seeing George slip on a
banana peel and slide under a fruit
stand )-"George doesn't look much
like dude now, does he ?" Bessie
mo. He has more Of subdued ap-
pearance at the present moment. -
Toledo Blade.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

Doesn't it make you sick to see
Gallon in his cupsi'
"I meyer saw him there so I can't
say but he's certainly sight to behold
when his cups are in him. New
York Herald.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

Passenger ION the Boston express)
-"Porter!" Porter-"Yes, sab. u
Passenger--"Will you oblige me by
stepping to the door and getting me a
glass of air ?"-Life.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

Irate parent-"Young man, what
do you mean by taking my daughters
hand just now?" Ratified swain
"You are mistaken, sir. Search me. "
Princeton Tiger.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

Jack-T am told that Harry fell
in love with Maud at first sight when
he met her by the seaside"
Tom-"It is true but you must
remember what a sight it was. New
York Herald.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

Chappie-"I always pay as | CO."
Maud-"Do you see anything in
this room you would like to buy Y"-
New York Herald.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

The mercury in the thermometer at
noon to-day was looking around to
see if there was any room at the top
Washington Star.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

Marie-"Would you be surprised il
| told you that Sack White proposed
to me last night ?" Louise-"Not at
all. l knew his creditors were press.
ing him terribly, and I fully expect
ed that he would do something des.
perate. ."-Munsey's Weekly.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

A mans idea of being good to a
woman is to give her opportunities to
be good to him.-Atcbison Globe.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

Budgely says the most difficult part
of drinking song is the "refrain. =
Binghamton Republican.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

He-"How prettily the moonlight
falls upon the sea and on the beach,"
She-"Yes, but don't you think it
is even more beautiful still among the
boulders away from the hotel p
1t had occurred to her that he, too
might be bolder over there.--Somer-
vile Journal.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08
WIT AND HUMOR.

Never ask woman her age, unless
you desire to witness her rage
Texas Sifiings.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

She-"These flowers are just lovely.
but mamma thinks it is not right
for me to accept such gifts unless
unless we were engoged."
He-"Well, l guess it. is a go.
These flowers cost $1h, and it seems a
pity to have the money thrown away"
-Indianapolis Journal.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

Discouraged father-"I don't know
what to do with the boy. He gets
worse and worse all the the time"
Friend Of the family-"Do you try
to develop the moral and religious
side Of his nature p
Discouraged father-"Do ~ I've
whipped that boy thousand times
for not committing to memory bis
regular twenty-five verses a day from
the Psalms Chicago Tribune.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

"And you say you would die for
met I'm afraid you're not as brave
as that" "Am l not? Why, show
my fearlessness Of death every time l
come into your presence" "How is
that?" Because you always look so
killing" That settled the business
New York Sun.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

Ethel-"Bohoo I'm sure that
Charlie doesn't love me any more"
Maud-"What makes you think
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08
MICHIGAN CENTRAL
"The Niagara Falls Route"
Time Card in Effect.

Daily. I Daily except Sunday: Parlor car on
aay trains and sleeping cars night trains.
j. WHITING, Ticket Agent.
RUGGLES, q. Y. T. Agt.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

Don't build a raft to cross river
until you come to the river.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

Ethel-"Why, we haven't had a
quarrel for four or five ays."-Mun.
sey's Weekly.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08
A Possum Ridge Love Scene.

n genLiendH Wds over on Ooeuul
Ridge the other day hunting, and
after tramping about for some time
he sat down on log in the woods to
rest. Directly he heard voices, and
peering through the bushes he saw a
young couple but few feet away
sitting side by side on the grass.
They were both barefooted, and he
was in his shirt sleeves. his cotton
pants being held up by single bed
ticking "gallus." The gentleman
overheard portion Of the couples
conversation, which ran thus:
He-"I wuz thinkin' O. you to-day
She-"Now. wuz ye'"
"Yes, I wuz."
"What wuz ye thinkin' bout me =
"Lots O. things"
"You jest talkin', now."
~ haint nuther. I did think bout
ye."
"Wuz they good things or bads"
"They wuz good, O. co'se."
"Now you jest talkin', Hiram"
II haint nuther. I wuz thinkin
good things bout ye."
swat d. yer think ?"
"I'm feerd you'll git mad if I tell u
"Co'se l won't if yer thought good
things"
T-I-thought yer wuz awful
purity"
ooh, Hiram, amt yer shamed
yerse'ff"
"No, l amt. Yer air purity"
eyer know I amt, an yer ain't
got no business ter make fun of me-"
"Hain't maxim fun of ye. Yer
the purtiest thing I ever see."
"Thar's lots O. gals heap purtier'n
me, yer know"
81 amt never seed EN-"
"Te, he, what else wuz yer thinkin'f'
81 thought yer wuz awful sweet"
"Oh, Hiram, amt yer 'shamed ?"
"What fer ?"
"Fer tellin' sich big stories"
at amt no story. Yer air sweet"
"How yer knowp
eyer look like it. Yer look awful
purity an sweet"
Nov yer jest talkin'."
81 haint nuther."
"Yer jest pokin' fun at me-"
II hain't. l mean ever word
say"
"Oh. Hiram, ha int yer shamed ?"
"No, I hain't. I wuz tbinkin'
somethin' else, too"
"What wuz it ?"
"I'm feerd you won't like it,"
"Wuz it bad :"
"No, it wuz good"
II won't git mad, then. What wuz
il o.
"I-I-wuz thinkin' I'd love ter
marry yer."
"Oh, Hiram, I'm goin' home"
Eyer said yer wouldn't git mad"
II hain't mad, but yer orient ter
make fun of me-"
"Hain't maxim fun of ye. I do
want ter marry yer"
eyer know better"
II do want yer. I'd git married
to-day if yer would. Hain't yer
willin'?"
"Uh, uh."
"Why ?"
Cease"
"Ca'se what Z"
"Jest case"
"Yer don't love me none."
eyer don't love me, nuther."
81 do, too. Wished you loved me
as good as l love you."
"How yer know I don't ?"
eyer amt never said so."
eyer ain't never axed me-"
"Yer do love me then, don't yer ?"
IL hain't said 60, hev II"
"No, but yer will won't yer!"
II like yer heap"
"How much yer like me ?"
"Better'n anything"
"Better'n store candyw
"Yes, l b'lieve ] do. Dyer like
me that good 2"
"Uh, huh. Yer lots sweeter'n
store candy"
"How yer know? Yer never
tasted me-"
81 would like to, though. Mout /
kiss We jest once"
"What yer want ter kiss me fer1'
cease it's good"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08
0. |. PARTRIDGE.
Real Estate Agent

Rooms 4, 5, Dawson Block.
win take charge of estates for residents and non.
residents collect rents, pay taxes, place insurance
obtain abstracts OF title, etc.
Once hours-10 to 12A. NJ, 4to8P.M.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

II trust, young man." said the
preacher during his call on the family
the other evening, that you are pur-
suing the even tenor Of your way :"
I'm pursuing the even tenor Of our
church that's in my way" replied the
youth hotly. IF he doesn't stop
flirting with my girl I'll lamm him."
Buffalo Courier.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

"No l don't. Yesterday he was
short and he is short again to-day"
did he want to borrow from your
mo. hang it, I wanted to borrow
from him."-New York Press.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

Miohi an Central.
PM p. M
$40 Bay City, leave, rs
l25Pa. leaves Detroit, arrives, $40
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08
Detroit, Bay City & AIpena R.R.

Mail and Accom- Mall ana Accom-
Express. mediation, EXDress' nhoustoh'
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1891-07-08

IL don't know what Smith does
with his money"
mo 20
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-04-23
WOMEN AND CHRISTOPHER COLUMN
PITS
From the Atchison Champion:

From the Atchison Champion:
In the life and career of Christopher
Columbus, the alleded discover of Amer
lea, the four hundredth anniversary of
which is to be celebrated on big scale
in Chicago in 1898, women figured prom
inently and inf1uentially. Columbus
was himself seven times discovered and
bv women. His mother was woman
of aristocratio birth, and, like many
American women, married below her
station, wedding a foreign count, and
like them in another respect, she was
obliged to support him.
Thrown upon the shore at Portugal
from wrecked ship he metiPhillipa,
whom he subsequently married. This
woman taught him three things-the art
of printing, the use of the quadrant, and
the improvement of the clumsy compass
of that time. The next remarkable
woman with whom he came in contact
was, strange to say his mother-in-law.
Stranger than all else, she loved him and
treated him nicely and boarded him for
clothes also for nothing. She petted and
coaxed him, and awakened in him de-
sire for the sea.
IIi6 D6Al WOUldu w liC lctL ilcI
upon Columbus was his sister-in-law,
woman who deserves a large place in
history, for it was to her that the dis
coverer was indebted for the enthusiasm
which led him to sail in quest of the I'M
known continent.
Then there was another woman whom
he met who. in turn. sent him to Queen
Isabella, of Spain. While in Spain he
met another woman who showed him
the way to the royal palace. This was
the woman who, later on, became his
second wife Her name was Beatrice.
But, next TO his first wife, Queen 1sa-
bella was the most helpful woman Co
lumbus ever met. Isabella called a
council of men from the kingdom of
Castile-aIl the shrewdest and wisest OF
the nation-who. by the way, consider
ed Columbus proposed voyage Of dis
cover an absurdity. Finally, however,
Isabella gave UP all her Jewels that her
protege might sail 10 the west-''to
place where nothing is,"-as her wise
counsellors said. And, when at last the
long. long voyage 10 the west ended. It's
perilS, mutinies and trials all over. Us
the storn-beaten ship stood IN towards
san Salvador, the night before Columbus
stepped for the first time on the shore of
the land he had so ardentlv sought. q
woman, the wife OF an Indian. saw the
strange vessel, and holding aloft torch
suddenly snatched from neIghboring
heap OF emhers. gave TO him light by
which he az once made a safe landing
aud became the discoverer OF America
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-04-23
THE SUN ON HARRISON.

The New York Sun can hardly be
accused of gush for anyone. The forte
of that paper is to fay, not to smother
with treacel. The following editorial
however is little short of grand tribute:
Gen. Harrison has evidently started
upon his Journey with the intention of
doing his full duty as an orator. At
every stop of the presidential train there
is a speech from the platform of the
of delivery the rhetoric of the entire
trip of $3.50 miles will amount to at
least thrice the volume of all the previous
speeches, published letters and papers of
Benjamin Harrison since he entered
puplic life.
But what speeches they are, thus far!
1t is pleasure to read them. Nothing
short of the extreme of partisan unfair
ness can find in the little Pullman ora
tons anything to ridicule or despise.
Candor compels the statement that at
the tail end of the Vacuna, surrounded
by the hundreds and thousands of his
fellow citizens, who throng to inspect
the wonders of the presidential train,
and to gaze upon the nations chief mag
istrate, Gen. Harrison is at the very best.
Whether prepared carefully in advance,
or extemporaneously excogitated, his
occasional remarks along the route have
been nearly faultless. Modest in tone,
interesting in matter, local in their APP
plication while general in their charac-
ter, lively without being sensational,
full of ideas, consistent without being
monotonous, excellently and often elo-
quently expressed, they deserve recogni
ton by political friends and enemies
alike as models of Pullman platform
oratory.
1t is as if Gen. Harrison had embraced
the PIE sent opportunity to exhibit HIM
self and the capabilities of his intellect
to the people of the United States in a
new aspect. Other presidents before
him have tried the same experiment in
the same way. Few, if any, of the nav
igators of the great political circle have
succeeded so well as Gen. Harrison.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-04-23

his introduction he said: Before I get
through your chairman will be sorry
that have responded to your invita-
tion." He told story of ''oid DANES"
who gave what they could not use in the
way of clothing to the poor, think
ing it would be laid up for them
IN heaven. He then drew picture
of these ''old danes marching down
the streets of the New Jerusalem arrayed
in all these cast-off clothing" at this
juncture several persons left their pews,
and one woman brushed out and slam
med the door in sign of disapproval. The
lecturer did not hesitate. but continued
to use his illustrations in the same strain
Of the saloon-keepers he said: sit Is
good thing we did not get rid of them all
of sudden, because they would form
such crowd at the gates of hell that the
devil could not take them in except one
at time" In the midst of his sermon
the organ began to play. But DR.. Small
not taking the hint, called up to the or.
ganist, "Hold on, there, I'm not done
yet" Again he started, and on more
the key was struck on the organ, but
this time the lecturer paid no attention
to it. He continued to preach and stop
ped at $50. Fully twenty people left the
church during DR.. Smalrs remarks.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1891-04-23

he wanted the carriage 10 can LOT nam
The kindly old gentleman did so. Hs
stepped il the Office, and calling 10 tbs
young man, said:
II want I'd see you about that carriare.n
wait a moment" said the youth, evi.
IDENTIFY aSitated He laid down his pen.
and coming from behind the desk led his
visitor into a far corner and continued: II
can't settle that just now, as am deucedly
hard up. I'll fix it by the middle of the
month, dead sure"
What do you mean'" said the old gen.
tleman.
ssWhy, amt you the collector for the
Gouge 'em Transfer company
..No, I'm not. I'm Miss Bondholder's
father, and want to know where my car.
riage is to be sent for you tonight"
He wen. TO the theater in the carriage,
but he did not enjoy it much.-Louisvills
Past