Bismarck weekly tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1884-1943, 1891-09-18
HOW TO BECOME BALD,
A GERMAN PHYSICIAN GIVES SOME
SARCASTIC ADVICE.

He Speaks of Many Dangerous Practices
That Arc Very Common, Especially
Among People Who Pride Themselves
|, on Being Cleanly-Hints to the Wise.
A clever writer, the possessor in all prob
ability of a bald head, has proved that
badness is a product and sign of culture.
According to this savant a mans growth
of hair lessons in proportion to his advance
ment in civilization. He declares that
every anthropologist could prove this as
sumption by examining the races of man.
kind. The old Romans then looked upon
the bald head from a wrong point of view
when they only paid half price for a "slave
with a shining pate"
If badness is q sign of culture, some
thing ~"devoutly to be wished" we shall
perform a public service in showing how
this condition can be quickly reached.
Non-scientifc people will possibly study
our advice in order to do the opposite, and
thus keep their hair as long as possible.
We protest at nee against such misuse of
our wisdom.
Before enumerating the ways to become
bald, it may be better to say a few words
regarding the necessity of an art to accom-
plish that end. Doubters might say that
there was no art in becoming bald; that
time and age would accomplish that de-
Sideratum without other aid. 1--WE lose,
in the course of time" said Voltaire, "our
teeth, our hair and our ideas"
That may be true as far as the teeth and
Ideas are concerned, but we cannot always
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many aged men with heavy heads of hair.
The hope, therefore, that age will make
one bald is deceptive.
ture must resort at once to methods of art.
It is not even possible to depend upon loss
of hair after sickness, as it usually grows
again when health has returned. But art
accomplishes other results.
EFFECT OF HEAD COVERINGS,
The first good rule is to keep the head
warm. In summer if you wish to become
bald do not wear a straw hat. On the con-
trary, let your ~headgear be a felt or cloth
hat, a derby or a stovepipe. In winter al
ways wear a fur cap. While in the house
at all times of the year do not fail to wear
q fez or an oil cap. Women, whose light
t do not wear off the hair rapidly
enough, may accomplish that end by using
heavy switches of false hair.
A roll of false hair will work even more
rapidly than a fur cap, as the hairs will
fall out by the hundreds when the roll is
heavy enough. The beloved nightcap, so
dear to our grandmothers, is to be highly
recommended also. The helmet of the Of
fcer and policeman is also a splendid in
vention.
What is the effect of these head cover
ings? They make the head perspire.
Moisture is the deadly enemy of hair. On
the temples and the pack of the head near
the neck, usually. untouched by the hats
and caps, it is seldom that one sees bald
ness. On the other hand, the hair usually
falls out on the parts of the head which
are covered. A bald ring often marks the
position of the hat or cap.
As perspiration destroys the hair, fire.
quent use of steam baths is to be highly
recommended. The habitues of the Rus.
sian n Turkish baths can show, almost
without exception, beautiful bald pates.
AS stated above, moisture is the deadly
enemy of the hair. Consequently, diving,
when one is in bathing or swimming, is a
praiseworthy practice. The douche is even
more effective. I annot praise it too
greatly.
RAPID MEANS EASILY AT HAND.
The custom of many women of allowing
their wet hair to dry in the air also deserves
to be mentioned here. The moisture re-
mains longer in the hair when allowed to
dry, and acts accordingly. The widesp"e ad
practice of washing the head is a good
thing also. A comb with moderately mar
row teeth will clean the head if properly
used.
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rapidly enough, it is advisable to wash it
frequently. Ellinger has proved from sta
tistical reports that eighty-ive out of every
hundred fortunate possessors of bald heads
have been accustomed to washing their
hair from early childhood. That is really
encouraging.
The various hair waters, hair oils, DO
mades, coloring substances and other in
ventions of the BARRIERS and perfumers
must be considered also. They are all
praiseworthy. The pomades and hair oils
accomplish their purpose in various ways.
The warmth of the head makes them ram
cid and sticky. The scalp becomes irri-
tated and makes washing necessary. The
other cosmetics for the hair contain poi
sonous chemicals.
The fluids for coloring the hair, for in
stance, are made almost invariably, in
part, of salt of lead, which not only poi
sons the roots of the hair, but the whole
body in the course of time. The materials
supposed to aid the growth of hair are
usually admirably adapted to destroy the
bits that may be left on the head of the
user.
COMBING, BRUSHING, sINGEING, ETC.
All pulling, tearing, rubbing md toss
ing of the hair aids it in falling out. I rec
ommend, therefore, the frequent use of
hard brushes, such as steel brushes. Our
young dandies who "curry' their heads
every morning with two brushes, and in
the course of the day comb their hair when
ever they see a mirror, are on the right
road to badness.
That is also true of women who allow
their hair to be combed by Impractical serv-
ants. As to combs, those which nave lost
teeth are the best, as they tear out hairs by
the dozens. Rubber combs have an ad-
vantage in making the hair electric-when
in that condition it often falls out by the
handful.
Singeingt the hair causes it to fall out also.
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