The Wichita daily eagle., 1891-09-21
suNFIowER s1LHoUETrEs.


Mrs. Lease travels over the Santa Fe on
a pass-No. 2718
The time is fast coming when the
Alliance will fail to ally.
1t is safe to say that the rainmakers
have many a water-haul.
Peffer owes his present position to the
Kansas soil, but be ought not TO soil han
sas' name.
The only way for Mr.. Diggs to get the
reputation of supporting his wife. Is to
have her run for some Office.
The Dickinson county Republicans re-
solved that we favor 20 instead of 13
pounds of sugar for dollar"
Senator Plumb says there are only two
sides in politics. And Plumb takes the
right side, which is the bright side
Even the Alliance has improved in the
last six months. The Democrats are said
to be Withdrawing from it in great num-
bers.
Brigadier General Polk's sympathy for
the Kansas school children probably arises
from the fact that they study northern his
tories of the rebellion.
There are q good many one-legged sol
diers who are running on the Repuo olican
ticket in Kansas who are going to get
there with both feet this fall.
It remained for Wichita to prove that
the roar of the lion and the howl of the
hyena can attract bigger crowd than
Peffer's roar and Simpsons howl.
"How long oh how long" PETER cried
in his speech. stroking his beard And in
the silence that followed man in the
audience remarked. We'll, don't know,
but should judge about thirty inches"
'The Alliance is doing a great work for
Christianity" said a minister yesterday,
''the average Alliance haraugue is so poor,
you see, that the farmers are anxious to go
to church and hear something good"
W. F. Craig in the Emporia Republican;
Approach farmer and seize your front
collar button with your left hand If he
responds by taking hold of his back collar
button with his right hand, you then say:
"Well, times are mighty tight, amt
they?" If he thrusts his tongue into his
cheek, rattles the money in his pocket and
says, "Yes, brother" you may know he is
Alliance
Last Tuesday morning stranger with
long beard stepped into barber shop on
Douglas avenue and took his seat in
chair. Every barber in the shop looked at
one another knowingly and the man who
was preparing the lather, remarked ven
turesomely: you're going to have nice
day for your meeting"
The man fidgitied d little and said short
ly he supposed So
81 suppose you find the people of Kansas
in pretty bad shape everywhere you go?
the barber remarked again.
A strange change came over the bearded
strangers face.
"Your party is growing right along,
isn't it?" continued the barber, without
noting the effect it was having.
The stranger sat straight up in his chair
at this, and his eyes flashed fire.
"Why wha-what's the matter, Senators"
asked the now astonished barber.
Senator! Senator!'' groaned the unhap-
py man, great heavens! mani you don't
| take me for that for that pusilanimous PEI
fer?" The stranger was holding his head
with both hands.
The situation was embarrassing for ev-
erybody in the shop.
"I am patriot, the man shrieked. 81
am a Kansan, sir. 1 love Kansas. She is
the greatest state i'll the Union. Perdition
on the man that defles her," and the
stranger hid his face in his hands. Then
he braced up. "Cut it of" he said, ''cut
it off. every hair. My wife likes boards.
So do 1; but 1 will not be insulted. Cut it
off" and the man fell back in the chair
like he was going to go through surgical
operation, muttering something about PEI
fer. "Cut it off, he cried again. Il don't
| care if it is five dollars extra"
"And the mustache:" said the barber.
running his finger over the razor-edge,
Jerry Simpson wears a mustache."
"Cut that off, too, !" said the stranger. II
am patriot, sir"
| And after the stranger had gone, minus
a beard that he had worn twenty years or
more, the smart barber held up three fin
gers to his fellow employees,
| He had worked the same game three
times