Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1891-08-13
WRESTLING mrn = BED.
Experiences of One Man While Transfer
ring the Article of Furniture.

Experiences of One Man while Transfer
ring the Article of Furniture.
IL moved my folding bed up stairs last
week-all the week" he said.
81 have had that bed for a year, and
must say that during that time its conduct
has been such as to allay the suspicion with
which regarded it. had come to repose
a good deal of confidence in it.
''The landlady's husband suggested that
we'd better take it apart. He said he knew
how-it was very easy. So we agreed that
after dinner we'd take it apart. After din
ner he stepped out for few Jinutes.
While he was gone Podley came IN. Podley
means well, and he's my friend, but win
say that Podleys got no more head for
measurements than horse.
"Podley looked over the staircase and
hall 'Pshaw,' he said, 'you'n I'll take
hold of that and shake it up there while
you wait.
81 laid off my coat and lifted up the end
of the bed That was about half-past
last Monday. evening. Going up stairs
took the lower end. When we got up high
enough the tall, ornamental back OF the
bed jammed into the ceiling. 1t plowed
a jagged furrow in the plastering and the
Jar hurt me good deal. That reminded
Podley that he'd have to lower his end. He
lowered the bed so the top cleared the cell
ing and the bottom struck on the next
stair. Then we lifted the bottom to clear
the stairs and the top got tangled in the
plastering Podley thought | might lift
the bottom real quick, while he held down
on the top and got it by that way. Finally,
after we'd lifted and twisted and perspired
enough the combination came right and we
got it by the jog.
sit was easy enough then until we got it
to the top of the stairs, where the banisters
turn OF course it was too broad to turn
there.
"Podley rested his end on the top step
and leaned over the banisters and en-
couraged me while the bed slowly tore the
flesh from the palms of my hands and
crunched my shin bones Podley famed
himself and got facetious just at the last
gasp the landlady's husband came In. He
flew to my relief We lifted the bed clear
over the banisters and set it down in the
narrow hall. But we could neither turn IL
SO as to get it through the bedroom door
nor get it back on the stairs again.
after that bed had finished me and Pod
ley up and reduced the landlady's husband,
who is fieshy man, to mere soggy, pal
plating mass, we pushed it into room at
the head of the stairs and quit.
Tuesday evening the landlady's hus-
band came up smiling and confident. The
headpiece. he said, lifted right off We
opened the bed and lifted Then we shut
it up and stood it on its head and its side
and its stomach The landlady's husband
eyed it critically in each position and shook
it and thumped it on the back. But moth
ing came of that, so we opened it and got
the laudlady to sit on the bedpost while we
lifted on the headpiece. When we got tired
of doing that we shut it up and examined
it some more.
"Wednesday dropped in at furniture
store and asked for an expert with crow
bar to come up and take my bed apart.
The man said there was no need of sending
a man. He'd show me that a child could
do it, Then he opened bed like mine,
told me where to lift. and it came apart as
easy as anything went home and laughed
at the landlady's husband. After dinner |
went to show him-bnt didn't.
"Thursday | sent for the expert again.
Thursday evening went to dinner The
landlady's husband was sitting on the
porch He was deep lobster color. His
collar was nothing but yellowish rag,
and he drew his handkerchief ever and
anon across his brow.
EYES he said dejectedly, your beds
apart, but it isn't in your room. The man
says he'll have to saw the headpiece in two;
it's too tall for the door, The man, he
continued, just went away. He came here
about 1880. Que of your gears was sprung
The landlady's husband mopped his brow
and looked away as one who accepts chas-
in Christian spirit.
Friday | sent for the expert and his saw
and Friday night had the great happiness
Of seeing my folding bed in my room.
There, in the ungrammatical language of
the poet. let it layp For I'll lodge in an
ash barrel before I'll ever attempt to move