The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1891-01-08
PuNeENT PARAGRAPHS.

-Eluerr olSGeF-s' why uOnb you 1mls
prove your mind, Belle, instead of con-
tinually dawdling about the house?"
Belle-''What's the use? I'm engaged"
-Ethel-"Poor Clare! She is growing
old" Maud-'It must seem sad to you,
seeing you have known her since she
was an infant in arms. IN Y. Herald.
tone of the papers gives list OF
gems for the months" II saw that It
wasn't accurate. 1t didn't mention coal
once all through the winter months. -
Harper's Bazar
"A Canadian doctor has just been tes-
tifying that murdered mans hears
stopped fright in the middle Of beat.
That's nothing; policemen often do the
same thing. Utica Herald
--''You have paried from Miss Win
gis forever2" Eyes. | was always
afraid her brother would cause our sep
aration, and he did" 81 didn't know
she had brother" "But she has. I'm
her brother "-Philadelphia Press.
bridget, this is altogether too
much; you have new follower in the
kitchen every week" swell, ms'am,
you see the food in this house is so bad
that no one will come here for longer
than week. Courier des Etats- Unis.
"A mother always feels compile
mented when you tell her how much she
looks like her daughter, but the man
who thinks to please the daughter by
telling her how much she looks like her
mother is a fool -SomerVilIe Journal
Willing to Learn: George Ito deb
utante sister, 'I'm almost sorry to
see you go into society, Edith; you are
like rosebud-so pure, so innocent
Edith Never mind, George, can
learn. Puck
An Autumn Incident: DR.. A. to DR..
B.-''Nice trick you have played me
during my vacation. Here i turned over
to you lot of patients I have had for
years, and you have cured them all up
in a month. Courier des Etats-Unis
"A man will abuse the loafers him-
self, but when he has an idle day and
busy friend, did anyone ever know him
to respect the time of his busy friend SO
much that he did not go around to his
place and loaf with him?--Atchison
Globe.
Caution: Little Boy (in crowded
street car, to pretty little girD-'Tll
give you my seat if you'll take it." Lit
tie Girl (whispering)-''Im ever SO
much obliged, but you shouldn't offer
your seat until you are ready to get off
cause people will think you're from the
country. Good News.
He (about to take to his departure)
-"Where did 1 leave my hat2 Why
your pug is playing with it in the cor
ner. What-no-yes-he's torn the lin
ing out?'' She-"O, isn't he cunning2
Stay little while longer and we'H
watch him play with it. Isn't he anus
lng?"
-''I should think, Mr.. Owelots, that
you would be afraid to marry me. am
so old and have so much money that
people might misiudge your motive
my sweet Angeline, love you so, that
l would willingly marry you though you
were three times as old and had twice
as much money. - Boston Times.
Mate Ton ocean steamer rushing
into cabin) Captain, vessel has been
sighted off to the southeast displaying
signals of distress. Shall we change our
course to help them?" why, man, are
you crazyP Certainly not. Have you
forgotten that we stand q chance Of
beating the record on this trip?"-Bos-
ton Herald.
No Help Wanted. Visitor-'I say,
old boy, you are the most absurdly in
fatuated husband ever saw in my life,
considering how long you've been mar
ried. You praise every dish your wife
makes and yet her cooking is abomina-
ble." Host-"Sh! Don't speak so loud.
know her cooking is bad; but if say
q word she gets discouraged and sends
! for her mother IN Y. Weekly.