River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1891-03-12
STIRRED UP A WiIRL WIND.
Dad Nickel Gets the Melancholy Man
Into Trouble.

!
4 Twas a melancholy looking man who
I inarshaled himself and am ominous frown
into the car at Grand avenue Friday
morning His right hand was bare and
/ clenched and his left was enveloped in
a thick, wooden mitten. lie suspended
himself from strap because no seat
was ready to receive him and his too
/ apparent anxiety. and as he gently
lurcl ed from side 10 side he viewed
with evident envy the more or less
placid faces bent over the morning
1 prints The main object of his observa-
ton was thin man with mutton-ehop
whiskers, who edged this way and that
so give leeway for the unexpected move
ments of the new passenger. The lat
ter opened his right hand, gazed rue
fully into it, pushed the mans paper
aside and said:
as that counterfeit ?"
The thin man wasn't pleased. Every
body in the immediate neighborhood
saw that. but he pushed down his spec
tacles and replied in self defensive
tone:
How do | know p
Look at il p commanded the melan-
choly man us there grease on it
Has the sun melted the edge off ? Is
the date upside down, or, " he added, as
summing an air of walSeful and senor-
Gus suspicion. does it look as if |
made it outen an old lead pipe?'
1T doesn't interest me, sir, said the
thin man, endeavoring to give the inn
preston that an illustrated furniture
advertisement in his paper had secured
/ his whole attention. Il don't care one
way or t'other."
''Don't?" cried the other, whose mel
ancholy had given way to anger. do
you mean TO say, sir, that a cross-eyed
| ticket-seller has a right to tell me this
coin isn't worth any thing when the
train is just about at the station? Do
you mean to insinuate that / am run
ming "A counterfeit factory, where | turn
out five-cent pieces with a bullet mold
and plaster-of-parisc east? Do you mean
to work your cadaverous features into
the expression you haven't courage
enough 10 give voice 10, that that
crooled-nosed ticlxet-seller suspected
that l was regularly robbing the Gov
/ ernment2"
The Tim man didn't reply; in fact, he
seemed to be the least interested. A
MISUNDERSTANDING, roundfaced passen-
| ger leaned over the speakers shoulder
and. after look at a disreputable imi-
tation of a five-cent piece, sighed. This
seemed to lend additional eloquence to
the n. ,lancholy person, and he snatched
/ the paper from the thin mans hand,
seized him by the collar and shouted:
why don't you talk? Why don't
You have courage enough to say that
I'm am escaped bank thief, forger, a
rag-picker, dealer in secondhand
hand-organs? What do We twitch yer
whislSers for? Why don't you talk up
like a man and back up the black muz-
zled ticlket-seller? You know you
think that's a counterfeit, why don't
you say"
The thin man broke off the speech by
disturbing the others breakfast He
laid the melancholy mans form on the
mating. and while his arms flew around
like a windmill on stormy day he
| gasped
I'm not Constant Reader whRck
I'm not, 'Veritas' nor [whaclSl apT o.
those fellows [whacl1l; but if you V ant
a downright [whackl argument [whtclil
on counterfeits, here's [whacl1l or = o
my kind for you"
The brakeman escorted the melan-
choly man out at the next station and
gently told him where the nearest drug
gist did Enthusiastically Eagle.