The morning call., 1891-08-24
Some TlnGIy Corrections in a
Baseball Story.
TIE COLONELS ARE STILL SLIDING.
Bunglilg Work Lost Both Games TO The Locals
Yesterday, Making -Four in Succession
At The Capital CITY The Senator's Were
Presented with Baskets Of RiTa EE0ticS
and Two Defeats on The Same Day.
Standing Of The Clubs.

"Please tell Mr.. Hits, the baseball re-
porter. that l would like TO see him mo-
ment" said the new assistant sub-editor in
sweetly pathetic Im-new-on-th -job-but-
FH-get-there-yet tone of voice.
He was pale intellectual young man,
with large white oriel brow. around
which the soft brown madonna waves cluS-
tered in glossy profuson. Before coming
to work on the great metropolitan daily he
had been connected with a semi-reiigious
country weekly, and this was his first night
on the desk.
In his hand he held a thumby wad of
baseball copy and from the expression on
his spiritually beautiful face it was plain
to be seen that he was troubled. That is
why he sent for Mr.. Hits.
In response to his order, old Timely Hits,
the beer-soaked veteran of thousand ball
games, entered the sanctum. He wore an
So suit of clothes of doubtful vintage. a
supercllious I-know-my- business sort of
smile and the over-cOnfident air of a man
who doesn't know how it feels to be struck
by lightning.
Ibid you send for me, sir?' he asked IN
world-weary the-score-is-a as-follows accents.
THEY PLAYED WHITE BALL.
"Oh, yes. Mr.. Hits, and I'm SO glad
you've come. Sit down, please"
Mr.. Hits sat down.
~ see by your report of the game" re-
marked the new editor, as he picked up the
first Iage, THAT the Dubs and Blokes
played yellow ball at the Haight-street
grounds yesterday afternoon. Did you see
the ball?'
"Yes, sir"
"Was it yelIow?"
Mr.. Hits, who was confident that his su-
perior wisdom would prevail in all matters
relating to baseball. collapsed at this ques-
tion. The query was unanswerable SO far
IS he was concerned.
l once saw part Of game myself" re-
sumed the new editor. gazing severely at
the crushed Mr.. Hits. land if | remember
rightly the bal was white. ! see you have
acquired that perniciCuS habit which is
second nature to most repOrters-namely,
the gross misstatement of facts which is tile
most reprehensihe feature OF journalism.
We Will correct this by saying that tine
Dubs and Blnkes played with white ball.
VIII that do?"
u guess So" said Mr.. Hits, in still,
small voice.
Further along here find that Bill Bulk
filled the box for the Blokes. What did he
FL it with, may l ask?"
w IN his leel, Tepl6u MT. 11lLIS, VINO
had been mentally figuring up how much
salary was due him.
ONE OF TIE FEATURES.
well, why didn't you say so or hold on.
VIII You have some nutes?"
YES, sir"
Then perhaps it will be better TO state in
the notes that one of the features of the
game was bex fun Of feet, though for the
lie OF me cannot see exactly where they
come iu."
In the foot notes." said Mr.. Hits,
gloomily, but the joke was lost or the edit
or, who was looking for more inaccuracies
Now, here is Il paragraph stating that
the hits of the Dubs were very scTatchy.
Scratch, think, is too yuIgarIy suggestive.
Don't yOu think it would be much nicer to
modify that expression by saying that the
hits Of the Dubs were extremely irritating
to Mr.. Bulk?"
Mr.. Hits mutely coucurred in the above.
WHATS thisI resumed the critic.
SANDY Slides won golden opinions for the
clever daring he exhibited in stealing the
second bag?"
That's what he did," asserted Mr.. Hits.
well, L never! Why, what a deprnved
lot those Dall-players must be, aud to think
they didn't have him arrested when he stole
the first one. Here, make note stating
that the hilaTity of the occasion was sadly
marred by the thevng proclivities of one
Sandy Slides, who stole some of the para
MIR. Hits made note of it.
THE CORONER WAS NOTIFIED.
"You may also add that up tG the hour OF
going to press the stolen property had moi
been recovered. and that the police will
make tour OF the rawnshops to-day"
Poor Mr. Hits groaned aloud in the an
guIsh of his spirit
IS In the seventh inning" continued the
editor. reading aloud. Mike McSwat drove
corking three-bagger to left making the
circuit in safety, but died at the plate on g
wel-cirected throw from the"
And dandy play it was, too," inter.
Iupted Mr.. Hits, forgetting himself in {
food Of recollection.
Dandy playl Why. good heavens, sir
do you call killing man play? never
heard of such barbarity in all my life. Die
they notify the Coroner?"
NO, SIR" walled Mr.. Hits, In agony
as he tore his scanty locks, "but Pll do il
now, myself"
As Mr.. Hits has not been seen since, the
suppositiOn is that lie wandered away in
the moist and misty glimmer of the pale
gray dawn and jumped off ferry-boat be-
fore his corrected copy got into print. Al
any rate he is gone. and there is a lucrative
position open for some aspiring person whc
thinks he can get away with the technica
verbiage of professional baseball game
under like circumstances.
OF COURSE OAKLAND LOST.
Fortunately for the readers of The CALI
nothing of the kind ever happens in thi.
office, and they are enabled TO read Short
but sufficiently long account of the game
yesterday afternoon between Oakland and
Frisco. 1t made the fourth consecutive de-
feat Tor the Colonels, and the disaster wa:
witnessed by the largest audience for many
weeks past That is, it was large at The
start, but a great many Of them uuanimously
adjourned
There was little over two hours of slow
torture which opened with spasmodlt
twltchlng on the part of Oakland and ended
with the usual parOxysms. At the frs
clatier they secured three runs, Tree Phil
lips scoring Youngman and himself on ;
long drive to the clubhouse. Hunke,
Hines got TO third on some judiciously dis
tributed errors and scored on Hurley
steal to second. Then they rested on thei
lau!els until Frisco had lead of five or ST,
tallles, after which they spurted slightly
Dut IL was TOO late The game ended 8 to G
The COlnnels found Cobb for ten hits. bu
they scattered them and used poor iudgmen
In running The bases. They also fiocked il
herds after fly balls and then stopped ant
waited until it was everlastingly too late
Sommers and Balsz did the twirling AM
Umpire Sheridan stood and counted fou
until everybody got tired. Between then
they gave ten bases on balls and wer
touched up for ten hits. At intervals TIN
play was partly obscured by the fog, whic,
mas been OIL ON vacation, and for the re
turn OF which the spectators were deyoutl,
thankful. The score is as follows:
AT SAN FRANCISCO, AUGUST 23, 1881,
SAN FRANcIsCos. AB R. BH sB 70. A. ,
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