, 1891-07-16

Compound for sins | am inclin'd to,
By ding those ! have a mind to!
In the first place let us consider letters
Of friendship, especially those occurring
in u correspondence. How many per
sons begin these with apologies for long
silence, 81 don't know what you rave
been thinking or saying about me all
this while" or, more artlessly, 81 sup
pose you are provoked ut me for not
writing" or some other form of depre-
cation Of wrath, and then follows a string
of apologies and minute explanation Of
the reasons why the letter has not been
written sooner and promises of doing
better in the future.
Now all this is very conceited and
vain, since it takes for granted that
one's letters are of great value and have
been watched and waited for, whereas,
in point Of fact, your correspondent has
very likely been just as busy and just as
preoccupied as you have been, and has
not had time to notice that your letter
did not come or even has been glad that
it did not, because it has not demanded
an answer. One of the sad lessons of life
is that we are not of rs much conse-
quence to anybody else as we are to our
selves, and that very many of our friends
do not much care whether they receive
n letter from us today or this day week.
Ny own dearest and Oldest woman friend
and ! correspond very seldom, and never
accuse zach other or excuse ourselves
concerning the gaps between our letters,
and yet we love each other more and
more deeply as the silent years 90 on.
The next most common fault in friendly
letters is filling them with discussion Of
the person to whom they are written,
advice and suggestions about that per
sons movement or affairs, and ques-
tiOns rs to his or her health, opinions
and domestic circle. OF course, between
intimate and familiar friends all this has
its place, and there are plenty Of coca
lions when the very object Of writing is
to advise or question, or in some fashion
express ones mind about the person to
whom one writes, but in the ordinary
friendly letter this is not advisable.
When one takes up a letter in Il familiar
handwriting n says to ones self; "Ahl
here's u letter from A. Now | shall
hear all the Washington gossip" or.
"Now | shall get a little rest from all
this worry and bother of business"
But 10 and behold, the friendly letter
is simply "A raking over of all the things
which fret and weary you the most:
How are you getting along with your
lawsuit, or is there any chance that those
bonds or stocks will recoup themselves:
And how is your neuralgia, and did you
ever hear of this or that remedy, gener-
ally remedies that you nave thrown aside
long ago; or how you must miss your dear
little dog, and can't you trace the thief?
Or perhaps the letter is filled with adj
vice upon some matter whose true in
wardness' nobody understands but your
self, or some course upon which you
have deliberately made up your mind
and fixed your resolution, although you
hav not announced it to the world or
even to you correspondent.
MOI In Il friendly letter don't try t.
avoid egotism, but rather cultivate it.
Your friend knows all about herself and
her own affairs and surroundings; wha.
she wants now is to know sumethinl
about yours; some brief, bright little &C
count of something you nave done, som,
person you have met, some amusemen
whereat you have assisted and wherO
you have met acquaintance mutual t.
yon and Your correspondent.
Perhaps you live so quiet a life tina
you nave no social anecdotes to relate
perhaps it is so uneventful that you hav
done nothing and seen nothing wort
|, repeating. Well, then, fall back upo
the things not worth repeating so loa
as they are wildly in your mind. On
of the very most amusing letters | eve
read in my life was from n young gil
$ living n very, very quiet life and NAL
' ing no pretension to literary ability.
; was all about the adventures of a piec
: of sticky fly paper on a windy day, enc
y ing with her father setting his silk HI
down upon it, and then, while nobod
could speak for laughter, snatching L
:, the hat, clapping il upon his mead m
rushing ont of the house in masculir
contempt of the senseless hilarity of h
A family.
A very triaing occurrence you wi
c. say, and a very silly letter, but all II
le same it ave me u good laugh and
s merry mood, and l havo had n pleasa
Thought for that girl through all Il