Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1891-10-31
MR.. AND MRS. BOwsER.

MR.. AND MRS. BOwsER.
Mr.. Bowssr Gets Another Of His .strsaks"
On.
From, the New York World
All husbands are 'streaky." They viii run
along all right for week or two Is good as
pie and then all of . sudden and with no
valid excuse they will break out in the most
surprising manner. When Mr.. Bowser left the
house after lunch the other day he was in great
good humor and stopped to say:
Il think I'll stop and get tickets for the
theater tonight and Wen put in an enjoyable
evening""
When he returned at he sscended the steps
with scuff scuff scuff! unlocked the front
door. gave it kick and made his way into the
back parlor to growl:
house on q system?'
why, what is wrong. dear2' she qusrisd in
reply.
There's lots Of things wrong! had
scarcely left the office when this overcoat but
ton came off. l laid this coat off the 5th of
last May, and you've had five months to secure
that button"
''But didn't know it was loose. Why didn't
"Why haven't told you ten thousand other
things that ought to be done2 There are wives
VINO glance at their husbands clothing once or
twice year and discover what repairs are
needed; want darning needle and . piece of
string"
But I'll sew the button on"
mo; I'll do it myself. I don't want TO take
up your valuable time"
And despite Mrs. Bowser's entreaties and
protestatlons he threaded the needle with a
piece OF string and sat down and sewed ON the
button. He got it an inch out Of line with the
of Or lJv,x
nave stayed hve minutes in any event. but he
had carried his point. When he had laid the
coat aside he asked:
Have we got abrad awl and . piece of wa1ed
Il don't think so. What do you want of
them?"
ITO mend my suspenders, of course hadn't
gotta hundred feet from the house this noon
when it busted on me usual If there's
another house in the United States run like this
one Ia like to hear of it and go and sit down
on the doorstep for half an hour. Perhaps
can repair it with piece of clothes line until
l can get downtown again"
But you can't blame me. Mr.. Bowser," she
said.
anything"'
But how did know your suspender was
ready to break?'
That's all right, Mrs. Bowser! I'll get
piece OF clothes line or barbed wire and make
are wives and wives.''
Are we going to the theater?" she asked as
ne began pacing up and down the room with
his hands under his coat tails.
"What!' he shouted in q voice which Jumped
the cat out Of the room.
Are We going to the theater?'
"Theater! Theater! Have you gone crazy?
Mrs. Bowser, look-a-there, and then talk
theater to me!'
He unlaced one of his shoes and kicked it off.
ana there, at the end OF his big toe, was Q hole
about as big a nickel
II was intending to 60 to the theater," he
said as be stood and pointed at the hole .'but
l can't get away this evening. have got to
sta y home and darn my socks. That hole
there has started corn on my toe this very
day."
Mr.. Bowser, those socks we're bran new yes-
terday morning when you put them on!'
exclaimed Mrs. Bowser with q good deal of
energy.
"Oh, Of course! I probably cut that hole
with the shears / want a darning needle and
some string or something. As long as I've got
to take care Of my clothes through the rest Of
my life might as well begin tonight"
Mrs. Bowser protested, but he threaded q
darnlng needle with piece of red string and
used up about eight feet of it in darning the
hole. He appeared to be growing good ma
tured, and she ventured to ask:
Aren't We to 60 to the theater tonightY'
~ we get through in time We may"
''Get through with whatI'
"Mrs Bowser," he said, as he removed his
coat and turned his back, '1ook at the back Of
my vest!'
Il see it, but what's wrong?"
wrong! wrong! Is there q buckle there?
Put on your glasses and tell me il you can find
a buckle anywhere on the back of my vest
mo, don't see one, but this is the first time
you have called my attention to it."
Exactly. What was the use? That buckle
busted on three years ago last Thanksgiving
day. and yet you haven't noticed it. Is there
q spare buckle kicking around the cellar or
hanging up In the garnet? Ii not I suppose
can heat the stove poker and bend it up to
answer"
You only got that vest three months ago.
Mr.; Bowser, and the tailor never put y buckle
on! she exclaimed as she pulled at the strap
And this coat, Mrs. Bowser" he went on,
regardless OF her protests feel in this pocket
There hole there large enough to let cocoa
nut through! I've known it for years and
years and I've been waiting to see il you would
fix it. Have We got piece Of bed cord and
around?'
"Why didn't you tell me about it?'
"Tell you! Must a husband be eternally tell
ing his wife about these things? What's a wife
for? What are her duties? What should fond.
true wife delight in? Button off-hole in NV
sock-no buckle on my vest-hole in my
pocket-two buttons loose on my restitution
holes all torn out in my shirt Theater! Not
this evening, Mrs. Bowser! You can 60, but 1
haven't time After dinner I've got to get the
hammer, gas pincers, saw. file, brace and drill,
package OF rivets, screw driver, gimlet and a
lot of glue and see if can't repair some of the
damages and get myself in shape to 60 to the
office tomorrow. You can go and you'll prob
ably enjoy the play and have good time, but
shall be unavoidably detained at home-un-
avoidably detained, Mrs Bowserp'