The record-union., 1891-09-12
PEARLS POETRY.
Hoffman Deals Gently With a
Stockton ''Poetess.
He Points Out Great Truths Which
Were Partly Concealed in Ambigu-
Gus Language and Advises Pearl to
go It.,

My honeymoon, which was in full blast
a week ago, is now on the wane. My
father-in-law has laid his antediluvian
musket away, my mother-in-law has an
nounced her intention of paying me
visit in the fall, and peace reigns.
Owing to the usual lack of funds / was
compelled to leave my bride with her
mother and go to Los Angeles on my bri-
dal tour alone Wifey will take her bridal
tour sometime during the winter, pro-
vided | can borrow the money from some
OF her relations. At present our hopes
are centered upon one of her aunts and a
ten-acre field of beans. If the aunt dies
and leaves her nothing, and the bean
crop is a fizzle, she will be compelled to
forego the trip until my thrilling novel,
Fillmore After the Gas Was Blowed
Out" begins to prove profitable.
At Los Angeles my reception was inn
mense, thanks to the free puffs given by the
Times and Express, and to the untiring ef
and abetted by the Y M. a., Y. NJ. l., w.
| G.. Il. u. and w. Y. O. d. societies. Some
of the speeches lacked originality, and
the welcoming ode seemed to have been
used once or twice before. The rendition
of See, the Cankered Hero Comes," by
| especially were well rendered. The evo-
| lutions and maneuvers of the police de-
partment were remarkably fine. The
delegation of prominent citizens who
called upon me in the evening and invited
me to inspect the Courthouse and Jail
were all very fine. adroit gentlemen.
The freedom Of the city was presented in
| the usual way and was accepted. The
only disagreeable incident of the evening
was caused by Herald reporter, who
! endeavored to crawl into my bed without
removing his hat and got his legs tangled
up in the tail of my wedding garment.
My visit to Los Angeles was rather
| brief, and those who came to the hotel
the next day to grasp me by the hand
and wish ME luck, and get on to my sad,
sweet smile, were panied to learn that /
had fastened away on an early train for
Sangus, where I had made arrangements
| to assist i'll the capture of a rattlesnaBe
said 70 be as big around as a stovepipe
I Ind eighteen feet in length. We did not
capture the snake, but we enjoyed the
scenery.
Pearl" of Stockton, has sent me a
real gem of a poem, with request that l
shall sean it closely and criticise freely
[ think that rare and radiant maiden,
which her name is is a. r. L., will
appreciate the beauties Of the poem, as
there is in it a sad strain, analogous to
some of the productions of her own
facile pen. Allow me to say, in the be-
ginning, that l think there is no better
plan than for aspiring your poets to send
specimens of their best work to those who
have grown grayheaded in the business
for frank and open criticism. Such peo-
pie are always very much delighted when
these first works are received, and never
fail to return lengthy dissertations upon
the art of posey, telling how the poeti-
cal machine should be creased, and often
sitting up very late at night in order to do
SO. l really rejoice when some love-lorn
poetical genius fires an ode to his lady's
bangs into my sanctum, with a request
for criticism. II there is anything really
exhilirating to a man who is tetotally
| tagged out, it is the reception of a poeti-
cal idea so hastily dressed that he feels
like putting it into an incubator until it
has evolved a full-grown set of wLiskers
But this is not complying with PEARLS
request.
shall comment upon each verse sep
arately, in order that the fair author may
the more easily perceive the defects. The
| title Of the poem is
ALONE.
Pm sitting alone this beautiful eve
Reposing on days gone by;
Viewing the sun as IL slowly retreats
As it sinks far down IN the sky.
This is beautiful thought. The writer
was sitting alone, reposing on days gone
by. She was looking at the sun, which
was retreating and sinking at the same
time, therefore the sun was going in two
directions at once. This is a state of
things allowable, perhaps, in poetry, but
hardly compatible with the laws govern
ing the solar system. Said laws are i'm
mutable, or, are thought to be So 1t is
just possible that Pearl has witnessed an
astronomical freak, which should be more
fully mentioned. / have frequently seen
| the planets in the exuberant state conse-
quent upon jag, with moons consider
ably in excess of the usual number. but
have never witnessed a movement on the
part of old Sol similar to that seen by
Pearl. Pearl was repoSing, that is, sit
! ting, on days gone by, holding them
down, so to say, lest they should bob up
in front of her and obscure her view of
! the sun. But let us pass on to the second
and third stanZas.
Thinking of persons most dearly loved.
Recalled TO my memory but dim
BY the power of that all-wise Being above:
With warning He called them to Him
Those persons once known in childhood are
gone;
Have buried their heads in gloom:
Their splendor of roses will come TO new life,
Like The swell of some sweet tune.
Now we are getting down to something
which suggests action. The poet was ac-
| tually engaged in thought. Her memory,
or something, / cannot exactly determine
whether it is her memory or the defunct
persons alluded to, is din-very dim.
Another fine poetical point. There is
nothing so apt to form a taking paragraph
as an alluSion to the dimness of memory.
Some folks forget all aboutthe dinness of
their memories, and it is the poets duty
to allude to it. Some of us might 90
thrashlng along through life without
knowledge of the fact that our memories
were being made dim or worthless by
Strabismus, or cataract, or something of
| that sort. The noble generosity of the
poet is shown in the admission that her
own memory is all out of whaclx
In the third stanZa we are informed that
the persons the poet knew in childhood
have done gone and gone away and buried
| their heads in gloom. What they did
with their legs and arms is not stated.
which evolves the mental photograph of
a rooster, pursued by more valiant
rival, sticking his head into the inter
stlces of picket fence. This shows
| genius. The most trivial ideas of the poet
| should call up other ideas, and some
times little ideas which appear to be of
| no importance are really the foundations
Tor tremendous thoughts. We are also
assured that these bygone persons will
| live again, muSically, in their own splen-
dor-'hke the swell of some sweet tune"
! This is grain of comfort-another thinp
which the poet should scatter with a
lavish hand. had never thought of the
resurrection in this light, not having
taken much interest in theosophy, but 1
| am carried away with the idea. If I am
| allowed to choose tune having a real
good swell, or, so to say, a well-developed
Inflammation, like "Old Dan Tucker
Daddy Shot Barr or "Yankee Doodle,
l shall be greatly pleased with the re-
newed splendor of my roses. But how
about those people who have ignored
roses and cultivated Johnny INN nuns