Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1891-09-04


since 1863, is hardly qualified to sit on
q jury to decide whether the labor of o
barber on the Sabbath is necessity.
The report that Henry NJ. Stanley
and his wife, who was Miss Dorothy
Tenant, have separated suggests that
so far as her husbands heart is con-
cerned the bride was only tenant ut
will
A New YORK man climbed monu-
ment at New Haven only to die of
heart disease brought on by the exer-
ton. This will give New York another
excuse for not finishing the Grant
monument.
Mrs. JAMES BROWN POTTER says she
will not return to America until they
are ready to go down the bay with tugs
and brass bands to meet her." New
Workers should at once put every tug
and brass band in town under bonds.
A KANSAS woman induced her neph-
ew to commit a thousand verses to
memory to gain reward in the form
of Bible. He traded the Bible for
gun, and accidentally shot his aunty
in the back. Retribution is sure as
taxes.
The first steel postal car ever built
has run over 100000 miles on the
Monon Route, been successfully
through five snash-ups, and cost the
company only $40 for repairs. The
steel-car pioneer appears to be "a
slayer
AN inquiring statistician has esti-
mated that there is $500, 900 worth of
gold in the mouths of Philadelphia
women. It is fortunate that this was
kept quiet until after "Honest John"
Bardsley had been sent where he will
be harmless.
1t is stated that 4-year-old boy in
Forsyth County, Georgia, can read
any piece Of music at sight. He would
be capital chaperon for number of
pretenders who are toiling toward Bay
reuth with ponderous Wagnerian
scores" under their arms.
How MANY husbands and wives in
the world who are only living together
for athe sake of the children?" 1t is
not marriage that is a failure; it is the
people, and they begin to show each
other what failures they are when they
have been married eight or ten years.
HAVE parents any rig hts? You will
SO often see young. girls and their
beaus monopolizing the front porches
warm summer evenings, to the exclu-
sion of their mothers and fathers.
The parents cannot enjoy sitting in
the warm house, and the view from tho
back stoop is not pleasant. Have they
any rights to the front porch?
A GREAT many people who are miser-
ly when they are old. were very gen.
erous and free-handed when they were
young. To be disappointed has ten
dency to make people miserly. IF you
ever meet man who gloats over q
penny, you may know that one time he
gloated over the trust he had in his
friends, and that they proved disap-
pointment to him.
THERE is always something In st.
Louis to interest the stranger who
fails TO make railroad connection. Inst
at present one of it's enterprising
journals announces that the way to
test the good breeding of a dog is to
take the animal by the tail, and carry
it block by that appendage. If the
dog doesn't bite, it is a sure sign that
he took prize at bench-show.
The car stove is not playing any
part in the summer railroad wrecks,
but the coal-oil lamps are attending to
business during it's vacation. By the
way, we hear nothing from those bot
tie extinguishers which are hung up
at the end of the car, near the wreck
ing axe, saw and hammer, to assure
passengers that there is no danger so
long as they are conveniently at hand.
In one minute and half Pennsyl-
vanian ate twenty-four raw eggs,
shells and all, on wager and an
empty stomach, and is anxious to bet
$50 he can eat twice as many in three