The Caucasian. (Clinton, N.C.) 188?-1913, 1891-04-02


the brethren will please sing.
"On Jordan's stormy banks i stand ;"
The III. and NJ. hister was
squatting between the handles
of a pillow stock. Without furth-
er ado the candidate had an
iron hook fastened in the seat
of his pants, to which q rope
was attached and thrown over
a beam above. With a st lady
pull, by two sinewy Alliance
men, the distinguished gentle
nan was soon dangling III the
air, with hands and fee. vainly
clutching at the floor.
"Now hold the candidate in
that position, where he can BET
ter appreciate the beautiful les
SONS inculcated by the Alliance"
remarked the III. and NJ. III. cit
is needless for s. partially injtia-
ted brothec to longer clutch at
the floor. He has already had
some experience az resigning
and tho Wisest thing he can do
is to put into practice that vir-
tue aud be resigned to that 20,
sition we have placed him in,
and not postpone this matter
until he gets to Washington
again"
That hook, the High listed
explained, illustrates the firm
hold the Farmers Alliance has
on mankind. Your struggles in
the air show the folly of a eau
didate trying to regain his eqili-
brium while in the mighty grasp
Of our Order. 1t also illustrates
our political power to elevate or
lower man at will. Your futile
clutches in the air are to show
the folly Of a candidate trying
to reach for office through polit-
icians. The candidate can now
be released and carried before
the Supreme Spanker for further
enlig htenment, and while he is
making the circuit of the room
the brothers will sing,
"On Greenland's ley Mountains"
AS | notice that the candidate is
beginning to shiver in the cold
air of the room.
The Supreme Spanker sat up
on bale of hay. He ordered
the bandage removed from the
candidates eyes, remarking that
he had perhaps progressed far
enough TO stand the light Of the
Alliance, and, besides, he was to
go through another ordeal that
required all Of q mans faculties
to endure.
The seeker after light Was
then led up to barrel, and in a
tWinkling stretched over it.
Bring forth the sub treasury
plank, commanded the Supreme
Spanker, and convince the new
brother that it is not a rotten
one, but made of good, sound
timber. Let the High Execu-
toner do his duty like a good
and true Allianceman, while we
will all sing:
"Once I was blind but now I see.n
Forty time that plank rose in
the air and came down with a
mighty thump, before the with
ing victim was released and car
ried before the Supreme Spank
er again, to have the lesson lie
had just received explained.
'Yon have passed through one of
the most beautiful and edifying
chapters in the Alliance mode
Of initiation. You have public
ly asserted that we had only one
plank in our platform, and that
a rotten one. | feel assured that
you are how prepared to correct
this statement, and assert that
our sub-treasury plank is one of
the soundest you have ever felt.
We have several other planks,
as we can prove to your entire
satifaction, if so desired. Oh
you say you are satisfied! Well.
be careful in the future how you
speak sluringly OF something
you know nothing about. Now
carry ~the candidate, Bother
Conductor, tor other useful les
sons, and while he is on the move
let the members sing
''This is the way l long have
sought"
The great drencher had on a
table before him three black
feathers and a goblet half filled
with what appeared to he Bour-
bon.
After his long fatiguing pill
grimage our brother is doubtless
in need of rest and refreshment.
Place a chair that he may be
seated"
This was done, but by some
Straightforward the candidate
made a miss and was landed on
the floor.
"My unfortunate brother, you
have now learned the uncertain
ty of political campaigns. Just
as a. man thinks he has found a,
nice, comfortable seat, the A lii
ance slips it from beneath him.
and painful indeed is his disap-
pointment. | spoke just now of
refreshments, and had prepared
n. MIRO m acc n