St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1891-11-17
sANCTuM TROUBLES.
The Lot of the Exchange Editor
an Unhappy One.

The Lot OF the Exchange Editor
an Unhappy One.
The exchange editor of the Daily
Bread sat at his table scissoring and
maDgiing with something like ghoulish
glee the defenseIess exchanges in front
of him, says writer in the New York
Telegram. All over the table lay as
sorted piles of clippings. each pile held
down by uSed-up eleetrotype of Mrs.
Lydia Z. Pinkham, the s. shoe man,
battered baking powder ad., the solid
metal cut of a bottle of somebody's Sar-
saparilla, or plea slug from the COM
posing room.
He shipped.
He clipped.
He snapped.
He had started in to find material for
a hsif-column symposium on DR.. Mary
Walker, and had only succeeded i'll ind
ing three or four consumptive and in-
significant little paragraphs about the
doctor in sixty-Seven exchanges.
Blood was In his eye, and there was
something horribly suggestive in the
way he pounced on a fraii copy of the
Bogeyville Spike, the Perkins junction
Shorter or the Jubilee Logroller, sciS-
sored something out of its quivering
vitalS to add to his pile of Curious
Clippings. ""The Public Drift" or'What
They Think" or to smear with paste
aud slap down hard on a sheet of white
paper for the purpose of putting a
bIood-curdling OF savagely ironical head
above it.
And he kept on hunting for editorial
expressions of opinion on DR.. Mary
Walker.
A timid citizen from the suburbs
opened the door. took off his hat, aud
came in edgewise.
rs this the ROOM" he began, where
the exchanges"
what do you want?"
u should like the favor of looking
over the Hackettstown-"
There isn't a Hackettstown paper
about the othcei''
BEG pardon for troubling you,"
apolOgized the timid citizen, bowling
himself out backward.
'You the exchange editor?' inquired
sprigbtly, long-legged party with his
hat tilted on one side, vino came in
shortly afterward.
Yes"
"DO you get the Rocky Falls"
Don't get any paper from Rocky
Falls"
''Short Horn Palladium"
Snipl Clip Slash.
SIS the Short Horn Palladium on your
exchange list?''
"What do you want of it?''
Like to look it over, that's ALL"
you'll find it in that pile over there
on the floor"
The long-legged party went over to
the spot indicated and was looking
through the pile for the organ of public
opinion in Short Horn when another
man walked in.
Il should like to see copy of the Virgil
Guidepost."
Snip! Clip! Slash,
where will | find it?'
''At Slocum d Gofast's advertising
agency, probably"
''Umphi"
He slammed the door as he went out.
The next man that came In was pOrIly
person in Prince Albert coat and a
high silk hat.
''Ah! Have you the Chelsea Inyesti-
gatOr?" he asked.
1--WE don't keep a news depot, Sir"
'.Ah?"
''No, sir"
II did not wish to buy it. 1 only
wanted the privilege of looking it over"
Snip Clip! Clip. Snip
I'VE haven't it on our list" the ex-
change editor at last permitted himself
to say.
Can you tell me where will be likely
to find it?''
''At Slocum & Gofast's advertising
agency, presume"
Thanks. Good morning."
Morning."
Slash. swab! clip! clip. smear. snip.
sIashl
Il want to see the Poker Flat"
''Go to Slocum & Co
Hey WHAT'S that?''
The exchange editor locked mp.
A man with bad eve, a broad
brimmed hat, very long hair and a gen
eral flavor of Southwestern Texas about
him. was standing by the table.
What did you say, sir?" demanded
the visitor. with his hand on his hip.
II didn't say anything" protested
the exchange editor, hastily. What
paper was it you wished 10 See?'-
The Poker Fiat Currvcomb"
Certainly-certainly. Take a chair.
I'll look over these papers and find iU
for you. Beautiful day. isn'tit. Mighty
good paper, that Currycomb. It's one
of the best on our"
faint wuth a cuSS."
1ndl NhaI was gong to say. 1t
isn't as good paper-er-ah-''
"All want to see it fur is 10 find out
whether the internal old idiot that runs
it has said anything about my going
away. Ell he has, I'll"
notwithstanding. You're quite
right. Ill find it in second. Here it
is. What's to pay? Nothing. Glad to
accommodate you. Take it right along. >
The man from Poker Flat went away
with the paper.
The exchange editor of the Daily
Bread wiped his forehead, drew long
breath, picked up his shears and went
to work again, but he didn't slash any
more that day. He handled the ex-
changes tenderly, and when he used his
two-biaded weapon upon them it was
wirh chastened air of regret and the
slow, measured motion of a capitalist
clipping a coupon off government
bond for the purpose of making dona-
ton to charity hospital.
They Sized Him Up.
Ono of tho fret n, WING i,nDrae.od o,,