The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1891-07-24
MISCELLANEOUS.

Eyes" ''Now the question is. will he
be able to make his knowledge useful,
to impart it to others?" Il guess so.
He has begun to impart it to me. N.
y. Press.
~ believe you are carpenter" she
said to the new boarder. Il am" he
replied meekly. 'Well," she continued,
then suppose you can be trusted to
plank down your board money. st.
Paul Globe.
Sensational News. - Smiley - Did
you hear of the great movement in real
estate yesterday" Riley-''No-what
was it?" Smiley - ''The earth made a
complete revolution upon its axis" -
Saturday Evening Herald.
Owner of fish pond Ito man who
is trespassing) - Don't you see that
sign, No Fishing Here?'" Angler
with an injured air)-"Yes, and dis
pute it. Why, there's good fishing here.
Look at this basket"
AT a fire in Georgia recently, there
being no water at hand, some little col
ored boys pelted it with watermelons
which were growing in neighboring
field, and the melons bursting, soon
quenched the flames.
In Tacua, Chilli, there is an old resi-
dent who has recently discovered that
he must be Isl years old. The other
day he found document, which he
stated he signed when he was nine
years old, as the date of it is April, 1749
Perhaps his long life may be to some
extent due to the fact that he has only
just learned how to lie.
A lady living in Torrington, Conn,
found a humming bird with its bill
buried half an inch in one of the wooden
posts of the veranda of her house and
quite dead. The little thing had evil
IDENTIFY darted at flower close by and
struck the post with such velocity that it
could not get away.-liartford Courant.
blacksmith Ripper of Iglau, Mo-
ravia, had attempted suicide several
times and had been interfered with; 50
he constructed box like a clock case,
seven feet high, the door of which could
be fastened with a paddock inside. Then
he put strong hook in the top board.
entered, locked the door. and comforta-
bly, hanged himself inside. He is dead
Here are some of the themes which
the college girls discuss in their de-
batting societies: THAT the influence
of fashion is morally, intellectually,
Rsthetically and socially wrong" Car
ried by four. That it is well for people
to cultivate good opinion of them
selves" Carried by 49, That in order
to think more, we should read less"
Lost by "a.
AT a recent wedding in a Pennsyl-
vania town, to the clergyman's solemn
question, "Dost thou take this man to
be thy lawful welded husband?' the
bride responded very emphatically,
God helping me, do" The minister
looked grave and the groom cast sheep
ish glances, while several of the guests
smiled. The bride got the marriage
and baptismal ceremonies mixed"
An Etficacious Remedy.-A woman
in Iowa went to a physician to get
prescription for tender feet. He gave
her a mixture containing two quarts OF
cold water, one tablespoonful of bay
rum and two tablespsonfuls of am
monia. lie did not tell her how to
apply it, and she drank the mixture in
six doses. She says her feet haven't
felt tired since.-Detroit Free Press.
The perch in California streams are
being destroyed by the catfsh-that is
to say, the perch work their own ruin
by attempting to swallow the catfish.
The eat has two spikes or horns pro
jecting from the sides of his head, and
when caught by the perch these spikes
catch in the latter's throat. He can
neither swallow nor eject the catfish
and is starved to death.
"A prominent official of the Reading
railroad addressed porter on the train
as John" The latter said: Il beg yo'
pawdon, sab, but on this cyah, sab, it is
etiquet to call me 'potah,' and that
title, sab, | will answer to. You have
not an acquaintance with me, sab, that
warrants you calling me by my Chris
tan name, sab, although if you really
wish to know my name-which is not
John, sah-I will be happy to give you
my cahd, sab" The official was over
come.
In Philadelphia there has been
found lady of one hundred and four
teen, still in very good health" The
reason why I am here now" she ex-
planned, lis because l never worried
iabout anything in my life. If didn't
have anything" H. e.. get what she
wanted), II didn't worry about it, and
I've never had even a headache" this
last being the more remarkable, since
Of late years she has taken, and very
kindly, to milk punch. Let the doctors,
and the vegctarians, and the total alb
.stainers, and the 'anti-everythingarians
say what they will, that is the true
secret of health and longevity-not to
worry nor be worried. 1t is not neces-
sary to be indifferent. but only not to
fret. g.
Benefits of Abstemiousness.
An old man who enjoyed remarka-
b1a Of vi OF ,ra