Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-08-19

SERVANTS MANNERS ARE PECULIAR.
able bur involuntary abstinence from
food and the sudden hospitality of his
i'll advised hosts. wrote what he evil
IDENTIFY deemed "A scathing criticism of
certain social aspects of American life.
drew his pay for it and disappeared
His name was Hamilton Aide.
he says among other things that the
''love of privacy, so prominent feature
in the English character, is unknown
here, the privilege Of exclusion 50 rigid
ly enforced in the walls and fences of
our gardens, the closed doors of our
withdrawing rooms, Oh the first floor, is
rarely enforced here" But it is going
to be, Mr.. Aide. We are going to be
more particular in the future We arc
getting acquainted with your methods,
and we shall be more careful in the years
TO come.
If your nobility cannot play a fair
game of cards Of an evening or over
come the pernicious correspondent com
plant. what may we expect Of one who
is not noble at all and who visits in our
country only what is free, and who then
imagines ne is familiar with American
society?
do not know Mr.. Aide very well, but
it has been my misfortune TO cross his
plague stricken trail once or twice to
gnaw at the closely cropped heritage
among the hills where yet still fingered
the echo of his bray.
Judging by the sentiment expressed
by the low, coarse innkeepers along the
chicken feather trimmed orbit through
which he passed, it will be money in his
pocket if he will not come that way any
more. If he should, there are intima-
tons that good recipe for removing
egg stains from wearing apparel will be
great convenience TO him on his steamer
ride home.
Mr. Aide, whose signature shows that
he neglected to put up his fly screens
until too late in the season, says that
manners among servants of both sexes
are peculiar, as indeed they are in all
the lower orders Of one may be allowed
such an expression about Americans
Judging from Mr. AIDES familiarity
with American society, the article he
has written should have been entitled,
some Aspects Of Life Among Ameri-
can Servants" Then this gentle criti-
cism of mine would have been unneces'
sary and unwritten.
Dinners" he says, 'as a rule, in pri-
vate houses, are less good and less well
served than | expected to find them
You will notice great falling off even
from this. Hamilton, if you will come
back here next season. There will be
very noticeable flavor of pounded glass
in your pie, and every bed quilt in oul
broad and beautiful land will contain
little checkered sample Of your loud anc
vociferous panties pried from the un
willing Jaws of the household dog
Some of the dishes are excellent
but" l1 adds, as he dips his trenchan
pen in the bluing bottle at his coy LITTLE
hall bedroom in Whitecbapei street
"tbe prevalent taste for uncooking can
vasback duck generally renders tina
admirable bird forbidden fruit to me-
But that is not what renders 1t "a for
hidden fruit" to him at home.
The reason he does not keep his fabb!
being continually upholstered with can
yasback duck at home is probably tn
same one that prompted him to have hi
wine and the blacking Of his boot
charged to Mrs. Stanley at San Jose
Cal, in the spring of the present year o
our Lord and of the freedom OF tn
United States from the rulo OF Grea
Britain the one hundred and fifteenth.
Mr.. Aide accompanied Mrs. Stanley
Mrs. Tenant and Captain Jephson I
San Jose. where he registered as MRS
Stanley and party" They stopped at tn
Vendome. first class, tip top hote
which had preserved blameless reputa
tion M TO that time. Mr.. Aide, the neN
Rudyard Kipliug, who will doubles
lecture here by and by, was asked
register for the party, which he woui
have done if he had ever Travelled befor'
He flew into beastly passion and r.
fused TO register or give names OF any
the party, insisting that 1t was piece
American iInpertinence on the part
the hotel that he never saw eqnaie'
He finally told how many rooms the
wanted. to which he added priya'
dining room. =,
Everything was ordered sent to IL
dining rooms-wines, canvasback due
etc In the morning the two gentlem'
left early. They paid their otcn bill
The clerk took their word for what WI
theirs and what was not.
When Mrs. Stanley came to leave 8
found Of course wine she did not orde
and had to pay for backing the Doc
of this Keen critic of American manne
and cookery, this able savant of Britt
cold victuals, this bright young hybr
whose surprised and delighted Thu
stomach was tossed across the troubl
deep within the year now only HI
gone hy