The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1891-12-19
MANY YEARS A MANIAC
A MAN WHO HAS BEEN INSANE
TELLS HOW THE FEELING SEEMS

Hc Explains His Peculiar uRliuclnation
Began Muslng over Immortaiity--ul
Fad Was to Got Rich by Raising Rad
tshcs-Au Men Seem 60 Re Ills Enemies
was once insane, and | often muse
over my experience. There are OF COURSE
many kinds of insanity Some mental
disorders take place so gradually that
even the closest companions Of the vie
tim are at loss to remember when the
trouble began. II must have been this
way in my case. One evening, after an
oppreSsively warm day, a day when
experienced more fatigue from the heat
than ever before or since, sat on my
porch tanning myself This arm that
is now in motion, unused, must one
of these days be dust wonder how
long win the time be-"
Then | muSed upon the evidence had
of immortality could do things that
other people could not accomplish.
had gone through battle after battle,
and though bullets sang and struck
around me us thick as hail, yet remained
uninjured. had passed through epi.
denies of yellow fever Ny idea gained
strength rs Unused. and Twas convinced
that | should live forever No, this can
not be, for death follows all men alike,
Yes, am to die like other men. and |
believe that it is my duty to make the
most of life; to make money and enjoy
myself, and to educate my children. |
wanted to be rich, and began to study
over an imaginary list of enterprises
THE RADIsH SCHEME
At last | hit upon radishes. People
must have radishes They should be in
every shop, They could be dried and
sold in winter | would plant fifty
acres with radish seed, and people all
over the country would refer to me as
the "radish king" would form a
radish syndicate. and buy up all the
radishes and travel and be admired.
FASTENED to the house to tell my wife
that she was soon to be radish queen.
AT the breakfast table said, "Juha,
howwould you like to be radish queen2'
"A whatw she exclaimed.
! explained my plan of acquiring great
wealth, and during the recital she be-
hayed so curiously that was alarmed
| feared that she was losing her mind.
Finally she seemed to understand. She
agreed with me. but told me not to say
anything more about it. After break
fast saw her talking earnestly with her
father, and | know that she was ex-
planning to the old gentleman how she
intended to pay his debts when | be-
came known as the radish king. The
old man approached me with much con-
cern, and told me that needed rest and
that must not think of business.
He was old and sadly worried, and |
promised him that | would not think of
business, Pretty soon | went out to in
spect my radish kingdom Looking
round saw the old man following me-
From the field went to the village.
approached Il friend and told him how
| intended to become rich. He seemed
grieved, and | saw at once that he was
contemplating the same enterprise. 1t
seemed mean that he should take advan-
tage of me and told him So He tried
to explain, but he made me so angry
that | would have struck him if my
father-in-law had not come up and sepa-
rated u.s.
CURED AT LAST.
| tried to calm myself, but could not
Those who had been my friends proved
to be my enemies, and was determined
to be avenged; but before | could exc
cute my will was seized by several
men. My father-in-law did not attempt
to rescue me, and hated him was
taken to prison My wife came to see
me, but she did not try to have me re-
leased. | demanded trial, but no law
yer would defend me
Then realized that the entire com
munity was against me. | became so
wroth that my anger seemed to hang
over me like dark cloud. 1t pressed
me to the floor, and held me there. Men
came after a long time and took me
away, | thought, to another prison. One
day o cat came into my cell, and tried
to bite her She made the hair fly, but
killed her
| don't know how long remained
here, but one morning the sun rose and
shone in at me through the window. 1t
seemed to be the first time that had
seen the great luminary for months. A
mist cleared from before my eyes. My
brain began to work, and suddenly re-
allied that had been insane called
the keeper, and when he saw me he ex
claimed THANK heavenF' and grasped
my hand.
was not long in putting on another
suit of clothes and turning my face to-
ward home. A physician said that was
cured, and everybody seemed bright and
happy at my recovery | went home.
My wife tainted when she saw me and
learned that had recovered my mind.
| asked for my little children, and two
big boys and young lady came forward
and greeted me had been in the asy-
lum twelve years. .--Pearson's Weekly
----
African Wit.