The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1891-12-01
He Asks Nine Hundred Questions And
Winds up Himself for An
other Week.
Hello! Mister Editor.

X w e were JuSU WOIIuSIlLS "LCl0
people went who take papers and don't
paw for them when the bell in this
office ratified and the above sound came
rushing in.
B.-"Hello! hello! What on earth
has become of the devil"
R-"You missed it this time. You
called the editor instead of the devil ,
B.-"WeIl, I reckin it don't make
much difference which Of EN- [ hitch
onto"
R.-"What can we do for your
B.-"I want yer to tell me how to
git inter the Third party"
RI don't know Of any unless it
is the Prohibition party. They will let
you in if you touch not the wine that
is red"
B.-"Where is that third party they
organized at Indianapolis the other
day."
R.-"No party was organized"
B.-"The thunder you say! Don't
the papers say so1"
R.-"Yes, the papers said so, but it
wasn't So"
B.-"WelI. l thought it was so.
Betsy an me are going to organize a
party if the Democrat party don't do
better. Betsy says she can get up a
better party than the Democrat or Re
publican in fifteen minutes"
R.-"Perhaps Mrs. Bilkins is mis-
taken. Thousands Of men have been
at work on both of these parties for 80
years. They have set up at night work
ing on them. Wall street has spent
lots of money on these parties trying
to make one look as we'll as the other
B.-Pshaw! you can't tell me nothin'
erbout that. l know all erbout it. But
[ want to try somethin' new"
R.-"That won't do, Bro. Bilkins.
You must keep quiet and let Wall
street have a chance. They will keep
the parties all right. Why, if one of
the parties were to incorporate a meas
ure in their platform that would be of
vast benefit to the country, Wall street
would make them take it out, for they
will not stand by and let one party get
ahead of the other one"
B.-"Dogone Wall street. I'm a
free citizen. Betsy an me are ready
to join any party that adopts the Oca!a
platform"
R-"But you must remember that
you will injure Wall street and q good
many politicians if you do that. Be
sides that you will have negro suprem-
acy in this country"
B-"Blast Wall street an the poll
ticians, niger supremercy an every
else perlitical and otherwise. I
dom business fer Wall street an
[ amt afraid of negro supremacy. The
party that adopts the Ocala platform
will get IS per cent. of the white votes
that is all [ want"
R.-Yts, but you want tariff reduc-
ton, don't you?
B.-Yes, I do, an I'm goin' to have
it, but [ amt a-goin' to spend all ofmy
life votin' for a thing that is unimport-
ant and leave out things that are i'm
portant. No matter how cheap goods
are, if you don't have money to pay
fer them"
R.-''Well, both of the old parties
say that we need more money in the
country"
B.-"'Yes, an blame their skins, they
mean more for Wall street an it's
friends and less for the farmers. I'm
a Tom. Jefferson Democrat and an Abe
Lincoln Republican. I'm for equal
to all an"
R.-"Hold on, the parties all claim
B.-"I know they do, but they call
themselves 'aH.' We farmers are
none So they get equal rights to all
an we get none"
R-"Perhaps you are too impatient.
If you will wait about thirty or thirty
five years longer a bill will be intro
duced ~forbidding hornets to build nests
on your land"
B.-"Call it impatient if you want
ter, but I've got another name fer it.
l can't get Betsy a new kaliker dress
the children can't get good shoes
this fall"
R-"Yes, but if you see if the tariff
was reduced you could get your shoes
5 or 10 per cent. cheaper"
B. onfound the tariff. 1t is
nothing but tariff, tariff, tariff. I told
the other day that I would be-