Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1891-01-22
WIT AND HUMOR.

~ NOooh bdJ lnS lAih DOo'O'S
Herald.
The self-made man is always inter-
esting- specially to himself.-S0nler-
uijie Journal.
| Even the successful feminine effort to
be beautiful is a vain attempt Wash
| i7LJt0H Post
| The partisan in politics is the man
who does not think as you do.-Aea0
Orleans Picayuae.
A man of a fighty disposition should
never be made the cashier Of bank
Ptttsburg Dispatch.
Fame is glorious thing to achieve.
but small salary is more negotiable.
-BjngbaDltoR Leader.
There is one thing about the man
who likes YOU; no one can say he is
prejudiced.-Atcbis031 Globe.
When the office seeks the man it is
not necessary to shout loud. He will
hear the caIl.-Ne1C Orleans Picayune.
First Old Maid observation-disclosures
man under the bcd!' Second Old
Maid (calmly)--''Lock the DOORS
Epoch.
The bloom that is on the rye is all
right. 1t is the bloom that comes on
| the nose that is all WrOng.-Ac1C Orleans
| Picay1t1e.
Some animals she'd their coats in
warm weather but the dog leaves off
his pants ut the approach OF winter
| P0StOB Bulletin.
ut is said that money can never give
L., nh,
| ever, that every man wishes 10 try for
himself.-Ic1as SyJj@g8.
Emma-"Does my dress hang all
| right, dear?" Lucille-''It certainly de-
serves to. The style is positively
criminal!'-N. y. Herald.
Did she give you anything, BiI?"
| asked Bits fellow tramp. Yes. She
gave me the cold shoulder with plenty
Of sauce. "-HHpcT'S B0z0r.
DO you play cards?" asked the
minister Of the three cara monte man.
No" said the gambler, gravely, I
work with them. -,Son2crU5tlc Journal.
Mr.. Brumfoarl Chppy-''A fellow
told me today that | didn't know
| enough to 90 in when it rained.n Miss
EdgarIy-''What want of tact:'-
Lyc.
Sunday-School Teacher-"Love thy
neighbor us myself Who is thy
neighbor's!''' Little Girl - Please,
ma pnl, the folks as borrows from U.s."
PucG.
Il really don't see how Center man-
ages to live" They say he lives by
his Wits Yes. That's the reason /
wonder at his living at all. st. Joseph
Nc2OS.
He (sneeringly)-''Ts it because your
me?n She (sweetID-''No, it is be-
cause am told you are so very short"
-Bp0ch.
Minister-''You ought to whip your
hoy for fishing on the Sabbath"
Deacon-''I intend to, sir but thought
I'd let him clean them first. "-Detr0W
Free Press.
4 scientific exchange states on
authority that two bodies cannot come
! together without losing some of their
energy. How about man and tack?
-LUaCrenc8 american.
just see that trombone player. His
| face is red rs a beet from blowing
hard" Yes; he certainly ought to
know what is meant by strains Of
| music. "-B0Sl0@ HcraId.
The high-shouldered dresses which
are now the vogue were probably su@-
oested by an instantaneous photoUraDh
OF Fremchman in the middle of a
STANDARDIZATION Irt32scriDt.
..The town is boomino." writes a
GEORGIA editor, we have taken in
seventy new subscribers. and orr
efficient Mayor has oiven rs Sf0-or
thirty DAYS. -4hanW .LgHynnl
vo,1f,,ross \n ,''I,,,'' ''. ..} ~,
i five icoIas 1ron, wv M w. VII Ill ),
Aonn,;,,t.,,an XVIII alr, W..
WV - si,a r>r,+oe. Eonlz R2., '''''
is Inc baroness at homer, Yes,
better annonnEa MAJ, M 7 tr,;o o'
not IF ,,-o,.,, to .',,,o,,,l,-1 ,In!t
thinL sbn,d La ~ Lon,o =, ~ T2;oa 1,''l
Rluttlr, S''''
~. ,,--4 -. ,,o.., ,..,.
LOU 'li1,9t nave De?I gwen Il IaI'let
to his dcmoraliznd cniIoct0r ..WnT
rather If was, combination of fra
and ton en- - sHonI' >, T,,i,,a,n l't
Jouy01I 'l'~"'N' -'''''''''''A'''''
rho ,,,c-o,, -,,o1-o - .ho ,,.,oo, 1
so;I - ,,'7I, ;!"N1 ~ l''I ",.Icl '.n',
with snch low fnIIo ,r ~ he ~ waS hnl be
was surrounded NV , circle fhyonoT
which he couId moi Lrr,J- - Rocf71a
Courier
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