The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-05-01
"INJUN MEAL"
I Extracts from a Lecture Delivered by
the Late =. Minor Griswold.

@uS subJcSt Is 1nlu Moti. NY keCJuro
is a scientific treatise on the American In
dian. shall treat the Indian fairly. I
shall not treat him so often as he would like,
but will treat him honestly and scientific
ally. with no humor or levity.
It's comparatively but a few years ago
that this asst continent now resonant with
the hum of commerce and manufactures -.
and radiant in the garb OF civilization, was
one vast forest, in which the Indian ruled
supreme. But the Indian has been COM
PEELED to retire. put it as mildly as pos
slble out Of consideration for the feelings
Of any sensitive savage who may be in this
assembly to-night-to retire before the on
ward march Of civilization. "He has been
compelled" in the language Of an eloquent
Indian orator, ito land on other lands aIfd
to climb-other clipesn and, might add
to live-on other liver Once he wore the
white mans scalp at his belt, but now the
white man "beits him over the scalp" He
has followed upon the scent of the red man
until the red man hasn't a red cent.
In the language of the Psalmist:
Once here the lone Indian took his delights,
Eished. fit and bled;
Now most of the inhabitants is whites
With nary red.
The decline of the American Indian, so
sudden as to presage his early and final ex-
bAhSbAOus was Jus 70 u
causes which l will not stop to enumerate
They are too well known. There was one,
however. to which / must allude, more
potent than all the rest. The white man
Introduced it, at the same time that he in
PRODUCED gunpowder, but it has proved a
more potent destroyer than the white
mans bullet. This dreadful scourge, this
fearful destroyer of the Indians, whose vic
tins outnumbered those destroyed by pesti-
a al ~,
Griswold would pau in a perplexed way,
striving TO recall the name, then be would
draw piece Of paper from his pocket, ad-
just his eyeglasses and scan it carefully to
make sure of no mstake)-whiskyl That
was it. Whisky destroyed the Indians. |
put it down so that | would remember IT,
And any man will remember it il he puts
enough of it down.
The Indians took the whisky with a
readiness that can hardly be accounted for
when We consider how many years they
hsd been without it. In an incredibly
brief period of time after the discovery Of
America by Columbus, every savage-of
any pretensions whatsoever-had whisky
on his sideboard and in his wine cellar.
who, said Logan, In that eloquent and
touching speech of his delivered before one
of the early Washingtonian societies, at
Washington, "who ever entered Logan's
~
The Indians were not given to poetry.
The most OF the poetry written by the In
dams has been found. upon careful exRmi-
nation. to hove been composed by white
people | have written some very beauti-
full Indian poetry myself. There was a
period III my life when l didn't seem to
think anything Of throwing off a poem
and the public didn't seem to think any
thing Of it, either.
Some years ago, while editing a paper in
the far west, received some verses written
by the widow of a celebrated Indian
killer, euloRi2ing her deceased husband,
with request to copy. The first verse, l
remember, ran ike this-the other verses
walked:
My husband he was gallant,
My husband ne was gay,
And when no took warlIke stand
The In1uns rund away.
He laughed laugh OF Scornful wrath
To see the towards fee
With their high, their low, their
Puma ditdle rip-atog-a-
Rally-goggle' jun bo-ree!
There were ninety-five verses in all, and
each verse had like satisfactory termina-
ton.
The Indian ladies we're not Of a literary
turn of mind. They didn't care to vote.
Not being literary, there were no blue
stockings among them. In fact, very few
stockings of any color whatsoever. They
were not passionately fond of dress. There
is no instance on record where a business
lnjun-a thorough business Injun-has been
compelled TO make an assignment on ac-
count of his wife's extravaganza in dress.
The diversions of the Indians were Of the
most innocent ana cheerful description.
They consisted principally in running the
gauntlet and burning gentlemen at the
stake. L think, in the latter case, should
prefer to have my steak done as rare as DOS
sible.
Running the gauntlet is an ingenious com
bination Of the gymnsstic. calisthenic and
acrobatic exercises, intensified by the ex-
citing phases of the chase, which run quite
through it. The Indians form two lines, be-
tween which the culprit is to run, and
loosely brandish sled states, cleavers, plow-
handles, bedstead wrenches, cistern poles
and other stuffed clubs, the judicious exer-
csc of which is calculated to pronounce the
highest muscular development, while their
application on the gentleman under treat
ment has the most exhilarating effect.
The Indians had many interesting tradi-
tions; one in particular recall. There was
once an adventurous young Indiana sort
Of copper-colored Christopher Columbus
who, before the discovery Of America,
wanted to get up an expedition to discover
Europe. He told the Indians that way
across that great body Of salt water was an
old world, and assured them that if they
didn't discover it pretty soon some one
would come over from there and discover
them. AID if he had succeeded in his plan,
the whole current of emigration would have
turned from America to Europe. Indians
would have gone over there, planted colo
MES and driven out the white men.
He claimed, this Indian did. that by
taking Cunard steamer and sailing many
days-in those times ocean steamers only
sailed days; they tied up nights-he would
reach the old world, to the perpetual con-
fusion of Columbus.
He asked, in case they did not open COM
municatiOn with Europe, how they could
expect to have the Injuries of the east here
such as the cholera-and the rinderpestl
He advised, among other things, that q
shipload of Indian missionaries accompany
the expedition for the purpose of introduc-
ing the principles of Indian morality in
sections Of the old world corrupted by east
ern civilization.
In the midst of this harangue news was
telegraphed to the Indians that Columbus
had come [laughter] and the red mans ex-
petition to discover Europe came to an IN
timely end.
A SWELL CHINESE WEDDING.
Festivities That VIII Last for More