The morning call., 1891-10-11
THE INVENTOR OF
PHOTOGRAPHY.
Jules LGrmina Gives a Fantastic Account
Of Il.
The Rebellious Reflection That Would Not
Go Back Into the Mirror-1t Resents
Threats and Is Pugnacious.
special to The SUNDAY CALI.

Who invented photography? For. at last,
1t Is time to render under me that which be-
longs to-Casar. have been annoyed. for
a very long while. by seeing continually in
special books the error propsgated which
attributes to a Niepce, to a Daguerre, an
invention which belongs to Inc and to me
alone.
1t was 1 who invented photography. and
that under circumstances curious enough
and original enough, L may safely say, to
be worth the trouble of being related.
This is how it was. One night long, long
ago, had returned home after a wedding
repast. | had drunk conscientously to the
health of the young couple and had even,
on that occasion, pronounced a little as
course, at once eloquent and affecting, when
had been received with unanimous applause.
With my head slightly troubled. but GER
tainly not so much that my Ideas did not
preserve all their clearness, l had allowed
myself to be placed in carriage. was
simultaneously satisfied with myself and
somewhat irritated. The fact was that
though | had hundred times taken the
resolution never TO drink anything but
water at these feasts of which salmon with
caper sauce forms the most conspicuous
feature. had permitted myself to be drawn
into absorbing the innumerable mixtures
and DIVES sold By the patent protected
prisoners. Hence throbbing temples dry
tongue and palate and an over-eXcltement
of the most disagreeable description, WITH
out counting the humiliation one experiences
in disputng with his center Of gravity and
the laws of the immortal Newton.
MY REFLECTION DEFIEs ME.
Well | had reached my chamber and
begun 10 undress. / had taken up posi-
ton in front of my dressing bureau and
while unbuttoning my vest with my some
Et,ra I in ha mi
my pale face, my swollen eyes and my
drawn lips, and, getting into rage against
myself. which every man OF experience Will
comprehend, shovk my fist at myself, ex-
claiming:
"Animall brute! wretchl is it possible
that one can be weak enough 10 get lnlO
such condition?
My reflection came out OF the glass, also
shaking his fist, and said to me:
Just hit me once and I'll mash your
faceW
| admit that was greatly surprised, and
that for moment could find no reply. So
my reflection, growing boder, continued:
1--WE had quite enough of this! Every
night he cuts these capers, my word OF
honor for it. Every night monsieur comes
home in this disgusting state and stands be-
fore the mirror. and must obey his orders
i must appear, and for what? To have
insults hurled at me; to be menaced with
gestures which would disgrace street por-
ter. I've had enough of it, repeat. I'll
never go back into the glass again.
He said this in little peremptory tone,
the tone of reflection who has firmly de-
cided no more to let himself be led by the
end of The nose.
At bottom felt myself forced to admit
that he was not altogether wrong. What
idea had possessed me that had addressed
menaclng, nay rude gestures TO this lnottens-
i've creature.
Hence l excused myself the best l could.
when one wishes to be respected"
grumbled he, zone begins by respecting his
re1ection!'
"Refeetion, you are right; shan't do it
again. Let's fix everything up right. Go
back into your glass"
He seemed to reflect; then, with re-
bellious gesture he said:
Decidedly, nor
He commenced to provoke me. l turned
my back upon him and went TO bed. l slept
the best | could with a buzzing in my ears
aud dancing lights before my eyes.
THE REFLECTION MISPLACED.
The next day on awakening my first
thought was to smoke q cigarette by way of
mOistening my palate, which felt was full
OF dry pUinto.
brass l beheld my reflection. 1t was not his
place, as l politely observed to him. He
replied:
Il shall be everywhere, but 1 wont 90
back into the glass"
Shall admit to you that this reiterated
| affirmation of the past night made such a
painful impression on me that dare not.
no. dare not look in the glass?
| arose, dressed myself ana went out a
little more preoccupied, l own, than there
was reason for.
Now, this is what happened to me.
could not take single step without finding
myself face to face with my reflection. He
came out of everything, from the marble-top
tables of the cafes. from the metal of my
holder and from the nickel of my ink
! stand.
This had become a veritable persecution,
when 1t would have been so easy for him to
| have remained quietly in my glass, like a
reflection who understands his missive
Oh! / had no need to look. was quite
| sure he was no longer there. He had told
| me so and a reflection does not lie.
THE MODE OF ESCAPE.
said to myself
There is but one way of escaping this
persecution, which sayors of impolite-
ness. l must fall in love. When l am
alone with my adOred one, this reflection
must, indeed. be the vilest of the vile to
| thrust himself where he has no business"
So fell iu love. l cast my self at the feet
| of the beloved blonde, whose old gold locks
| shOne with the brightness of a new kettle.
| Horrorl nv reflection was there, in her
locks. watching me, sneering and mutter-
| ing:
81 won't go back into the glassw
He was also in her eyes aud in her nails
| polished with lanbikin.
Human strength has its limits, as General
| Trochu said. | resolved to bring this to an
| end. A reflection has no right, any more
| than any citizen, to put himself in state of
| vagabondage. a reflection has a domicile-
the mirror. He must go back into it either
| of his own free will or by force.
| OF his own free will. that was not to be
thought of. Now, it was in vain that l
| spoke to him, appealed to all his feelings as
| a reflection, objurgated him, strove to
awaken in him social, nay, even family
| notions, called him, in order to humiliate
| him, Benoton reflection, as being always
away from home-nothing had any effect on
| him. He sprang from everywhere, from a
| door-knob. from door, plate. from the
| gliding of an open box, from the shining
| ware in tlnker's shop.
| Wait bit! 1t was then that an idea of
genius shot through my brain. 1t was nee
essary to fix him, to fasten him somewhere,
from whence he could not escape.
THE GREAT DISCOVERY.
| Being somewhat of chemist, combined,
| / searched, [ analysed. l rubbed. And l
| established that upon plate o: silvered
| copper, covered with asphalt, reflections
OIL they had not the slightest suspicion of
| what awaited them-were fastened, impris-
| oned, incarcerated, fixed.
| | shall not enter into the details l have
been 50 much stolen from since thenl But
| the real truth is that | said TO my reflection
"Once, twice, will you go back into the
| glass!'
lie refused peremptorily. Then, l made
I him pass through tube into little box
where was arranged a plate Of glass pre-
| pared with art
And he was caught, hooked, as in mouse
trap. This done, put him back into the
mirror, where have seen him ever since.
Hence, it was / who invented photog-
raphy. JULES LERMINA.
TOO MUCH DRIVING.