Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1891-08-01
HH PUT DOWN the CARPET.
Mr.. snd Mn. Bower and Their Housekeep
ing rriais.

ing rriaia.
Prom the New FORK World.
They finally brought up that bedstead this
| afternoon" said Mrs- Bowser after dinner the
other evening.
dad, sh2 Just week since you picked It
out, isn't it,
"oniy four dsys."
"Curious how everybody takes advantage
of you. They wouldn't have dared fool with me
| that wayr'
"That-that carpet isn't down yet"
There's another specimen Of your style Of
running things! The Internal falsihers agreed
| to be here two months sgor'
"oh, no, dear. They said some time this
week"
| And they'llfool around TIL September. Mrs
bowser, don't want to find fault with you, but
| ! DO wish you knew more about business. You
let everybody walk on you as IL you were
| worm of the Garth"
| tested.
How Is il that everything 1 order gets here
on the minute? Because, Mrs. Bowser. / do
business in business way. II / should lie, YOU
| nave full swing here where do you suppose we a
| land at the end Of six months? However. will
snow those carpet men that they can't tool with
can palm off on his wife. I'll slip up and put
'nat carpet down in about seven minutes"
lou-you don't mean IL ~ she gaspei.
1 Sertalnly do. i don't care about saving q
dollar or two, but propose to assert my indie
pendence. Where's the hammer
Il wish you wouldn't. carpet has got to
be nicely put down"
Exactly; have seen one or two carpets in
my life! Where's the tacks?"
But know how it will end" she persisted.
asn a ger .ired out; get mad, and then
But remember, il is against nv wishes. II
anything happens don't blame me-
when dad ever blame your When did any
| thing ever happen?'
| She gave 1t up, and he removed his coat
vest, aeektie and collar and disappeared up
| stairs The carpet lay in a heap on the floor
aud he unrolled it, pulled up his sleeves AMI was
about to begin work, when Mrs. Bowser opened
| the door and observed;
| Il don't see how you are to get il down with
| out a stretcher."
Perhaps not. There are Q great many
things in this world for you and every other
| wife to learn, Mrs. Bowscr."
She retired. and two minutes later heard the
! sound OF the tack hammer. She stood il for
nve or six minutes and then went up and looked
| IN on him again. He had got the CARPET tackled
along one side, but she called out:
| why, you are lacking that carpet on the
pare moor There's the lining on the window
you?"
| He couldn't crawl out of it. and he contented
himself with rising up and pointing sternly to-
ward the door She went out, but listened and
heard the rip! rip! rip as be pulled up his
work: IL was quarter Of an hour before she
dared enter again, and then it was in response
| 70 yell which made the cook drop seven
plates and the dog howl mournfully.
! "w-whst is ii 81" she gasped, as she rushed
| against the wall.
| what is what?"
| why, you whooped like an Indian. Your
face Is as red as fire, and something's hap
pened"'
Mrs. Bowser. am not in the habit Of
whooping be sternly replied, land nothing
has happened. When want your valuable
| services IL call on you. The exclamation you
heard probably came from some one an bal
loon passing over the house"
he mad hammered away for about ten min
utes when she looked in on him again. He had
| three sides of the carpet down and was lacking
| the fourth. just as she reached the head of
| the stairs he rolled backward out of the bed
crash.
What on earth are you trying to do, Mr..
You up here again. he shouted in reply.
| DIDN'T tell you to 60 down stairs and stay
there9 Does it take 100000 people to put
down one COMPOUNDED old carpet!'
| But can't help?'
"No, you can't help, I'll put the thing down
alone or pull the side of the house down. No
| wonder the carpet men dasn't come up here to
lay it! They cut ii foot too short on this side
and foot long on the otherl Lemme catch
EN- around the house and - What's the
matter now?'
Its got to be turned around! You are try
ing to fit it the wrong wayr'
| mo, ANTI"
| "Wby, of course You are, It's exactly a fit
the other way! told you not to do it. KNEW
Mrs. Bowser," he began. as he crossed his
hands behind his back and gazed at her with a
benign expression, do l run this house or do
We'll. suppose you do"
| Very well When man was created the idea
was that he should run the house. That's how
| he came to know SO much more than woman.
| III am not competent howeyer-f YOU have
put down fifteen or twenty million carpets, and
never saw one in my life. why, you'd better
| finish this job and ask the court to appoint q
| guardian over me-
| it?r '''' '' A''''H
mot by jug full! I'll put 'er down if it
kills me stone deadr'
| He banged the door after her as she went out
and when be grabbed hold of the carpet and
ripped it up it seemed as if the house lifted up
[ a foot or more.
Darn We, I'll wallop We to rags to pay for
this she heard him growl as sne listened at
the door.
| He whirled the carpet around the right way
upset his saucer Of tacks and punched the lin
| ing all up In a heap. and he moved about he
l suddenly uttered another whoop and hobbiei
| about on one leg. She knew this was the last
straw and she fled. On her way down stairs
| she heard the window go up and the next mo-
/ ment something scrsped alongside the house
| and fell with "kerwhop" ON the iron fence
| IL wasn't Mr.. Bowser. He came down stairs
with his eyes as big onions and his face as
| red as paint, and soon as he could get his
| breath he shouted:
| Your old carpet is down, Mrs. Bowser-
| down out of the Window
Didn't tell you before you began that
No! You wanted il down.
''Didn't say you'd get mad and blame
Never. Mrs. Bowser, this is the last time
| ever lift my hand TO do anything around this
| house! I've rubbed more'n a yard of hide off
my knees skinned both elbows and driven
thirteen thousand tacks into my feet. besides
getting a crick in my back which will lay me up
the rest of my life"
| But l told you in the very beginning
| that
That you wanted the carpet down, 1t is
down! / am down! That ends it! I'll nail
! the old room up with sidewalk spikes and II
you even ask me in the future to sharpen a
lead pencil l won't be responsible for my ac-
| tons! Mrs. Bowser. good night.'
And as he limped upstairs and threw himself
| on the bed with jar which shook the house
and stopped the kitchen clock she heard him
| groan:
/ xh;-