The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1891-01-24

"Oh, yes, 1 see. Please get me som.
! paper and a pencil; you might get sew.
eral sheets of paper so we will be sure
to have enotgh.r While Alan was get
| ting the paper uncle said: You don't
mind my lighting a pipe, do You, Mary?
| can always work better when I'm
smoking. It's a habit l acquired in
college. 1t seems to brighten my rea-
. soning faculties"
Not at ALL" sweetly said the lady
addressed. Il believe the reasoning
faculties should Re as bright as posi-
BILE"
Uncle did not say any thing in reply,
in fact. it was some time before he ~
tered a word. Then he looked up from
a sheet of paper crowded with
figures and said, impatient ly:
There never was an est3te in
the world divided in such an idi-
otic fashion. A man who would make
such a will would be declared insane in
any court on earth. and the will would
be broken"
Perhaps that is pure mathematics"
suggested a voice behind the paper.
Uncle broke his pencil point in some
way just then, and when Alan sharp
ened it he got up on his knees in the
chair, with his feet tucked under him,
and took a fresh sheet of paper. When
that was nearly covered he said:
There there's your answer; 81 ,3249-1I,
and a pretty small estate that is to put
into an arithmetic"
"Why, uncle" said Alan, Il don't see
how that can be, for the daughter got
81. 723Ss."
what kind of an arithmetic is this,
any way?" growled uncle. Its an out
rage to make such books. When | vas
a boy we had sensible school books
and"
That is your old arithmetic, Robert"
said the lady behind the paper. When
| found they were using that kind, |
told Alan he might as well take yours as
to buy a new one"
Uncle got down from his chair,
walked slowly around the table,
climbed up again.
is that to change your luck, uncle??"
asked Alan. They say it will do it"
Mary" said uncle, Indignantly,
you ought not TO let Alan get such
vulgar superstitions into his head.
Mathematics. sir. are not to he con-
quercd by luck"
Fresh sheets of paper were taken and a
maze of figures grew under uncle's hand.
Around the edge of her paper Alan's
mother saw experiments in proportion,
allegation. arithmetical progression,
and here and there a dash of algebra.
The domain of mathematics was ran
sacked from center to circumference.
and victory came at last. That
estate" said uncle, impressively, was
worth eactly 81, Ill 13-Sa," and he said
it in the zone of a man ready to fight ii
his word was disputed.
Il presume that is right" said Alan.
"Any way. that is the answer in the
book. Now here is an easy one-at
least, our teacher says it is easy" and
he read:
IF - men In q days. by working 10 hours 4
day. can dig a trench % feet long. IL feet wide,
and Il feet deep. when the ground is rallied 2
degrees OF hardness. how many men in y days.
by working s hours a day, can dig another
trench - feet long, IL feet wide, and Is feet
deep. when the ground IS estimatcd at ) degrees
OF hardnesst"
As step by step the features of this
problem were presented to uncle. that
gentleman slipped further down into his
chair. When the voice of the reader
stopped. he looked like nothing in the
world so much as Grandfather Small
weed. if that amiablc old person could
be imagined as deprived of even the
presence of the birthstone Cat" The
eyes of Alan's mother appeared over
the paper and the abject appeal they
saw in uncle's eyes could not be re.
sisted.
Alan" she said, 1t is your bedtime.
Uncle is tired"
Alan gathered up his books, kissed
his mother, babe the figure in the chair
goodnight, and said cheerfully: We'll
try pure mathematics next time. uncle"
N. Y. Sun.