The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-02-09
BRIGRT BITS.

WHY are colts like rich mems sons? Because
they won't work until they are broke.-Pitts-
burg Dispatch.
TOMMY gazing after dude)--When get to be
a man, papa, will dress like that?
Papa (severelyl-No Tommy; not if you get
to be man.-Life.
GREENE-Gibson is fond of Yentilating his
White-Yes and the Lord knows most of 'em
need it.-MLnseyS Weekly.
GARRULoUs STRANGER ON A TRAIN-My wife's
name was Wood What was yoursS
Crusty Old Bachelor guess mines name
was ''wouldn't.n Ididn't get her.-Wdshfn0-
ton Star.
MAMMA-Willie, you must not spin that hum
ming top of yours to-day. This is Sunday
Willie (whirling it AGAIN. That's all right
mamma. It's humming Sunday school tune,
Chicago Tribune.
Mrs. GuMMEy Creading)-A man in Chester,
for $75.
G1mmey-H'ml He must be awfully fond of
his wife.-JudGe.
BLIMMER-Nhy is it that poets always make
the barefooted farmers boy whistle.
Bubble-I SUI pose it's SO that he will keep his
courage up when he goes into a stubble pasture
after the cows.--Chfcdgo Times.
81 DON'T SEE how you gentlemen can render a
verd let of not guilty. said the judge.
We'll, your honor" said the foreman, DO
litely, IF you'n watch us close Wen do it over
again and show you how. "-Aeto York Sun.
SIGHT that must make angels weep,
AS this broad earth they scan,
Is a $40 suit of clothes
On 99-cent man.
Smith, Grey d Co.'S Monthly.
"oH, MADAM, Jip has just hit a man on the
street,"
What kind Of !, looking man was it'"
poor JIpl Was the darling's mouth out with
little eau de cologne. Judge.
WICKwIRE--I tell you, Yabby, my boy, there
is nothing like baby to brighten up man s
home.
Yabsley-I have noticed that the gas seems
to be at full hight in your house at almost any
hour of the Embellishments Journal.
DEACON HARpscRABBLE to passenger requir-
ing three seats for himself and baggage)-You
are from the city, presumed
Mr.. Shoat-Yes; how did you know it?
Deacon Hardscrabble-O, we butchered our
country hogs three months ago.-Neic York
Herald.
AT 10 she jumps the rope and performs on a
trapeze. That is the age OF action. At 90 she
Tolls on o sofa or hammock and reads novels
That is the age of passion. At 30 she yields the
slipper or stove poker, according to the size of
the subject. That is the age of reaction. And
yet they say that action and reaction are equal
and opposite In effects.-BuGidto Express.
YOUNG HUsBAND-Here's the old chestnut
about a rose being Just as sweet by any other
| name. It's a lie; it wouldn't.
Young Wife-Pray, what difference could the
name make?
Young Husband-Well here's your own case
Two months ago you were Miss Catchin, and
Moses! how sweet you werel and now you're
Mrs. Coffin, and-Jerusalem! Boston Courier.
LOVELY DAUGHTER-Pa, Mr.. Nicefello pro-
posed to me last night and / referred him to
you.
Pa-weI, really don't know much about the
young man, and I'll have to-
Daughter--When he calls to see you about it,
you are to receive him kindly--real fatherly
remember-and help him along all you can,
until he asks for my hand, and then you are to
look alarmed and talk about what an angel
am and how many millionaires aud dukes and
princes I've refused; and then you are to reluct-
family consent and give him your blessing.
20, am, am I? But suppose don't, then
what?"
"Tll marry him anyhow" - NeU York
WeekIu.