The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1891-06-29
Peri 8 of Modern Life.

SOubThtlS Will cicClrlC WucSs diuOhu dCCiuCutb
broken car and elevator cables, explosions of
steam, natural gas and chemicals, poisons in
adulterated food and drink, are a few; but all
these dangers combined do not kill as rapidly as
slow and sure Consumption. The death rate,
however, from Consumption. is being yearly cut
down since DR.. Pierce of Buffalo. N. Y, has given
to the world his celebrated "Golden Medical Dis
eovery," a cme for Consumption and Throat and
Lung troubles that lead to Consumption II taken
10 time and given fair trial. The time to cure
Consumption (Which Is really rothiDg more nor
less than Lung scrofula), is in the FIRST stages.
cough generally sounds the alarm, and you should
take the Discovery" at once. There is time
when 1t is too late.
Little Johnny Fizz'etop has the habit of waking
up every night and demanding something to eat.
At last his mother said TO him:
"Look here, Johnny, never want 10 eat any
thing in the night"
We'll, | dol't think ia care much to eat any
thing either IN the night If kept my teeth in a
mug of water."-Texas Siftings.
In the "Guide to Health and Etiquette" will be
found much useful advice on both subjects; this
book is sent free for &c stamp, by the Pinkham
Medicine Co., Lynn, Mass.
First Grl-Don't you ever cry when you 60 to
the theatre?
Second Girl-No; I'm not so easily affected as
that.
Second GrNo L isS SCI nf taf :r1 Ba fAi''s Gould
never cry and chew gum at the same time
Judge.
To be free from sick headache, bill
iousness, constipation, etc., use Carter's Little
Liver Pills. Strictly vegetable. They gently
stimulate the liver and free the stomach from
bile.
Shopkeeping in the Suburbs.
Suburban Customer-Eight cents yard? Is
that the best you can do?
Suburban Merchant-It is, ma'am. Cost me
seven and half.
Customer-I won't payit can get the same
thing in the city for seven cents.
Goes away Indignantly, spends twenty cents for
car fare, sacrifices half day, and saves fourteen
cents in the purchase OF roll of calico.-Chicago
Tribune.
Gentlemen who retain youthful appearance
preserve their hair with Ayers Hair Vlgor.
A Revised Opinion.
81 was pleased 10 call that cake of yours per-
feet symphony, as you may remember" said
young MIR. Fits two hours after dinner
81 want 10 revise that expression. l feel now
as though had swallowed a whole Wagnerian
opefa.-lDdlanapolis Journal.
Not one In 1--WE nty are free from some
little ai.ment caused by inacton of the liver.
Use Carters Little Liver Pills. The result will
be pleasant surprise. They give positive re-
lief.
Having the Advantage of Him.
Mr.. Hoy Polay (extendirg his hand)-Howdy
40. Don't you remember me-Hoy Polloy?s
Mr.. Haulton-Oh-eh, yes - Policy unusual
name-that stuck; but your face is such CON-
mon one it really escaped me, you knUw.-Life
To invigorate and beautify the hair use Haps
Vegetable Sicillan Hair Remover.
Something Wrong.
"Have you got your house fixed, Uncle?
blouse fixed, Frank? What house?
.Your house. heard pop say there was some
thing the matter with your upper story.-Phila-
delphia Times.
Baby cried.
Mother sighed,
Doctor prescribed: Castorms
At the Studio.
Brown-There. look at that landscape by Mah-
stick. There's originality for you.
Fogg-Originalityl You may well say IT, He is
nothing il not original. A great artist; very
great artist Nothing was ever seen like that;
certainly not In naturalization Transcript.
Got hay fever? Some say Johnson's Anodyne
Liniment will cure it. Try 1t and report to US.
Minerva docking up from her reading)-Aunt
Fidelia, the Esculapian attributes rheumatism to
pathogenic micro-organism, which under GER
tain favorable conditions is received and propa-
gated.
| Aunt Fidelia-I don't believe word of 1t.
have had the rheumatism twenty years. and 1
never saw sign OF the creature yet.-Pharma-
ceutcal Era,