Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1891-02-18
Uncle Remus Nonplu ssed.

Uncle Remus Nonplu ssed.
HOW THE OLD MAN TOOK HIS FIRST RIDE ON
AN ELECTRIC CAR.
One pleasant day not long ago Uncle Re-
mus concluded that he would take ride
on an electric car. He had been engaged
for some time in making up his mind. There
was enough of mystery about the means OF
locomotion to make him somewhat skittish.
In point of fact he had his own private
opinion, fortified by an abundant supply OF
superstition, in regard to the whole matter.
Nevertheless he decided to make little ex-
cursion on the car. He saw other people
riding, and what they did he could do.
So the man was on hand when the car came
down to the starting point, where there is q
wait of five minutes. He watched the con-
ductor reverse the continuance that connects
the motor with the overhead wire, and then
he got on. He smiled as he took his seat,
but even his smile betrayed his anxiety. He
fumbled about in his pockets, until he found
o quarter, which he proffered to the motor
man.
"Don't be in hurry, old man," said
that important funcJionary, "the conduct
or will get yonr fair"
"Yasser," said Uncle Remus. Goa de
ter line. whar dey got muels, halter gi'
de money ter de driver-dat wat make l
han'it ter you. Dish yer amt de same kind
or kyar. Hit look mighty blank out dar.
I'd feel lots better eff dey was Vaughn
tongue stickin' out dar, or some muels or
sumpi'n."
"Why, if we had mules out there" said
the motor-man with consequential air,
"they wouldn't last five minutes. We'd
run over'em. We'd grind them into glib
lets.'
"You hear datw explained Uncle Remus,
solemnly, addressing no one in particular
After pause the old man continued:
"Boss, is de stuff what make dish yer
kyar 90, is she de same ez dat what make
de thunder?n
"The very same" said the man.
stAin't you skeerd?" asked Uncle Re-
mus.
SHAWL" said the motor. man; $50 long
as it don't SINCE the hair on my head amt
afraid"
"Well, suh!'' exclaimed the old negro,
looking at the man admiringy. Then, af-
ter little pause: "Boss, does you keep de
truck in dat ar churn dsI?" indicating the
brass cylinder containing the machinery for
turning on and shutting off the electric cur
rent.
Something in Uncle Remus's lonesome
suggestion of unusual polteness and affa-
bility-caused the motor-man to look at
him more closely, and the look was followed
bv a pleasant smile, which was at once
recognition of and tribute to the old ne
gro's attitude of respectful anxiety.
eyes" said the motor man, "we keep it
in here" touching the upright cylinder
18th his foot, 'sand when we want any we
Just turn it on"
"Same like you draw 'simmon beer out'n
a barrel" suggested Uncle Remus.
''Yes," said the motor-mar, somewhat
SIMILARLY"
''Sometimes," said Uncle Remus, ''de
beer got sech head on Ter dat she'll ny out
en- flew all over you. DO dat truck do dat
away?"
sit amt never done it yet" replied the
motor-man, sand when it does want to
be plumb away from here.''
EFF it's de same kinder truck what busts
sloose in de elements" said Uncle Remus,
sdey must be enough I'm it in dat churn
dar ter make thunder endurin' a whole
summer"
The motor-man made no reply to this.
In response to signal from the conductor
he struck the gong sharply with his foot,
causing Uncle Rsmus to dodge as if he had
been shot at, turned on the current, and
started the car. A negro girl sitting oppo-
site Uncle Remus put corner of her shawl
in her mouth and Uttered. The old man
turned on her fercely and exclaimed:
"Whar yo' manners, gal? Is dat de way
yo' nanny Parn you-come ggglin' in de
comp'ny?"
"Ds Lord knows amt dom nothin',"
said the girl, twisting herself around on the
seat. 81 des settin' here ten'in' to my own
business: want sayin' blessed word to
nobody"
"Who you GRIMM an gigglin' at den?"
asked Uncle Remus severely. "You'l be
apwipe on dat away some er deze oddcome-
shorts an you'll break yo' puckerin' string.
Den what you gwne to dot"
"Mister,'' said the girl, turning to the
conductor, II wish you'd please, sir, make
dis colored men lemms lone. l amt doin'
blessed thing to him."
sFarer' exclaimed the conductor. He
spoke so loudly and So unexpectedly that
Uncle Remus lodged again, and this time
be flung his right arm above his head, as if
to defend himself. This gave the angry
girl the opportunity she wanted.
s.Jes look at dat op mani she cried. 81
b'lieye be eoin' crazyw Then she began to
laugh again. Even the conductor smiled
and Uncle Remus percei 7ing this smiled
himself, but somewhat grimly.
As the conductor was giving him his
change peculiar groanipg sound issued
from the motor underneath the car.
sBoss," said Uncle Remus. somewhat
anxiously, "wharbous Is 8 all dat szoonini
Hit poun' like de win BLOWN thoo kno'i
hole"
"It's the current" said the conductor.
s.Yasser!'' exclaimed Uncle Remus
nDat what lowed hit wuz. Hit blawlin
down OAR like steer calf lef' out in de
ra,r. She amt gwine ter bus loose en- tai
ND hnthin' is she, boss?"
mot right now, l reckon" replied ths
conductor. :.
This was very unsatisfactory to the ole
negro, particula ly as the zoon'ng and
grooming sound continued to grow louder
I'll. looked out of the window, first on onf
side and then on the other, and then rose
and seized The hand-strap and gave it a
jerk Seeing that the car kept on, Uncle
Remus gave the car more violenl tug, and
then another and another.
EFF she's a-runnin' away" he exclaim
ed, "des say de word. en I'll tar up de fl J
brt I'll git ont'n here"
seeing tho old mans predicament, the