The record-union., 1891-03-14

|
election, and so the word is being passed
around all over the country.
THE ONLY PRACTICAL REMEDY.
| It is not the fault of the professional
| blatherskite that he is elected to Office;
nor is it the fault of the manipulators
who nominate him. 1t is absolutely the
fault of the people themselves, and one
remedy lies in voting for no man who is
known to belong to that class, regardless
of the ticket he is running on.
The better and most etfectual method
of all is to pass constitutional amend
ment making none but mutes eligible
for legislative poSitions-deaf ones pre-
ferred.
BY this means, that large and respect
able class of our fellow citizens viii be
lifted from what is now generally con-
sidered an unfortunate and afflicted con-
dltion, to plane OF eminence and great
usefulness. The idea possesses rare fea-
sures of practical feasibility, and at the
same time the cause of humanity is pro-
moted TO an advanced stage in the super
! lative degree.
Will the California Legislature take the
initiatory step in the direction thus briefly
outlined?
THE PRIVATE CALENDAR.
This is matter which the people of the
United States know as little about its in
side workings as anything else belonging
| to Congress.
AS the name implies it is an annual reg
lster, year after year, and session after
session of the just and honest debts which
| this Government owes to its private citi-
Zcns, and embraces every class and char
acter of private claim which would be
| found IN the management of any other
| large commercial institution.
The Government Of the United States is
known TO be most exacting and relent-
less creditor. No one with experience
| VIII deny this position, but this private
calendar has become an official advertise
ment to the world that it is most heart
| less and dishonest debtor. During late
campaign in California there was IL party
which enjoyed the exceedingly euphoni-
Gus title of honorable bilks.'' 1t was a
misapplication of terms. The way the
| average Congressman treats the Govern
ments debtors through the medium OF
| the private calendar entails upon them
alone all the odium which those words
imply.
One can form an idea of what eminent
| equities private claim must possess
when it is known how a favorable report
is obtained. Upon appearing before the
| committee or Subcommittee of their
number, instead OF sitting as impartial
judges to hear and determine the merits
OF case, they inStinctively resolve them
selves into that many attorneys for the
other side, and try their best how to de-
feat it. From meanness or ignorance, or
both, they stupidity consider this method
to be their bounden duty.
Possibly majority OF these claims arc
unpaid balances for which there is no ex-
istlng appropriation, or they may have
Jailed to suit the age, or the pocket, OF
some pigeon-headed, narToW-gauged,
efficient clerk in one of the depart
ments.
That last-named individual derives his
reputation and holds disposition through
all kinds Of administrations, solely unon
his usefulness in knowing the precise
pigeon-hole, the exact number of file, the
State whence it originated, and name o:
every claimant.
His efficiency is based upon and main
tanned by piodding along III the same un-
certain trails of his more pigeon-headed,
narrower-gsuged and less efficient prede-
ceSSor They intuitively regard every per-
son who has the misfortune to place any
reliance in the honesty of the Govern
ment in its business transactions, as re-
yivifed Confederate soldier indiSguise,
and his claim wholly intolerable-unless
the claimant has pull" When these
cases are presented TO Congress. regard
less of the justice of the demand, in nine
cases outof ten it would be charitable to
report them adversely, instead Of report
| ing them favorably, and consigning them
after year.
Occasionally some sterling member
makes specially of one or more of these
claims from his district, and after great
trouble and delay gets it through both
Houses in one Congress-but that is the
exception.
Noticeably from the Pacific Coast are
Mitchell of Oregon, Stewart of Nevada
Sargent and FELTON, OF California, but it is
OF very rare occurrence, although they all
ladle out very large quantity of soup tc
the starving claimants.
Pension cases belong to this list. There
have been many of that class presented
here which could not possibly be safely
handled, even through those valuable ex-
emptions promised by the improved
odorlesS excavator.
Friday of each week is set apart by the
rules for consideration of the private cal
endar. Six or eight times during Il ses-
sion it may be observed, but thereafter
the rules are suspended and some lone
winded especial order'' takes its place,
and so does debate, for the rest Of the ses-
sion.
Friday evening of each week is SET
apart for pension cases exclusively. II
never yet has been set aside for other
business, and they grind out from fifty
to a hundred and fifty every evening.
Congress rarely ever adjourns without
clearing the pension cases from the calen-
dar. The reason is simply that the pen
sion cases have the Grand Army pull -
The other private claimants are unor-
ganiZed, withouta pull and it is sub
ject that demands the earnest considera-
ton of the national conventions. 1t has
been wonder to me that the Farmers
Alliance have overlooked that glaring in
justice. The House calendar has nc
trouble. There is big money in some OF
those cases.
ECCE FEMINA.
Closely covering the retreat of the
grand army of soap-chewers comes the
regular annual-female-veter
corps. Boxes, $40; season tickets, s.; adj
mission, so cents.
The same debate which the country had
been nauseated with, and was about con-
graduating itself upon being rid OF, is
supplemented with four-days' side
show, presenting the same identical Jaw
work in more antique but less danger
ouS form-to full houseS-varying the
monotony with music, sex and an opera
house.
Everything ran along smoothly until
two OF the delegates emphatically claimed
from the rostrum that each, personally
had encompaSsed the overthrow of SEN
ator ingalls,. Inasmuch as that gentle
man has always been q warm friend OF
genuine work in the line of female adj
yancement, those two sanguinary gladi-
ators were stImmarily coughed down. 1t
also had the additional happy effect OF
sitting their rampant jea Iousies, and
they sheathed their bowie-knives with
Christian-like resignation.
Some well-meaning lady evidently not
on the ''inside''l sent them note asking
consideration for the poor female wage
worker" The little episode unfortunately
got into the local papers.
The show continued on according to
| 4 l.. l.. Al
put in an appearance. Had that ''impu-
dent hussy'' been found, first-class