The Newberry herald and news. (Newberry, S.C.) 1884-1903, 1891-01-22
THE ARIZONA KICKER.
Eastern Journalists Have to Get Accii-
mated.

mated.
In its last issue, which was three
days late, owing to circumstance be.
low narrated, the Arizona Kicker says:
ONE MORE USFogTUSATE-The
other day tenderfoot who said he
had been a reporter on the Pittsburg
Chronicle, came along and struck us
for a job, and we set him to work Mon
day on the agricultural department Of
the paper. We warned him against
the strange climate of this strange
country, and that he must not attempt
to handle anything until he first
asked toe name of it. After -tWo.s
or three hours he got the swell-hssa
and went out to chin with The T6eys,
and that afternoon We buried him. He
had heard tell of jackass rabbits, but
had never seen one, and somebody !.
made him believe that Col. Moore's
mule, which was tied near the post
Office, was one of the gentle creatures
OF the plains. He was looking to see if Z
the rabbits feet were webbed when the
calamity came. Mortum bum, which
is Latin for he didn't know it was
loaded, and that we have his latch
key, i've cents in money and sum-
mer necktie which we will forward to
his friends on request.
IoLD him So.-Three months ago.
when young man who had stnck
type for thirty-fiye cents, per NJ ona
Cleveland paper, and had knocked off
because he couldn't agree with the ed
toriai policy of the paper, came out
mere to establish plant and grow
wool on his back. We sat down and
talked to him like brother. There's !.
nothlng mean about US. We don't
want the earth. We have a great
weekly newspaper, a butcher shop,
grocery saddlery, shoe shop, mil
hnery store and signal service bureau
all under one roof and we don't
care how many other enterprises
are established in this wild west.
This young man planned to start A.
weekly over at Pedro Valley, and we
warned him to pitch into the Car of
Russia and go light on the BOYS at
home. That's the safe policy while
learning to shoot right and left handed.
he didn't seem to take kindly to our
advice, and our last words, as we lent
MIN sixteen letters out of a font of lob
type; were to prepare for the up-hilIs
and down-hills of the hereafter The
sequei proves that we were correct.
he issued one edition, jabbed his home
subscribers, and now he sleeps on lot
No. II, section 81, ofTower's sub-diyi-
sion of the 1000 acre tract. He died a
victim of the climate, assisted by will 5
ing hands.
LOOK A WALK.-Any particular lack
OF interest on our editorial page this
week must must lead to a little incident !
winch occurred Tuesday forenoon. A
crosseyed pressman, who was working
himself from San Francisco to Boston
10 see his mother die, had put in a
couple OF weeks with US as literary
editor. He seemed prudent, level
headed fellow, and we passed in his
copy without reading 1t. What did he
90 out ring in little item to the effect
1nat four aces always beat a royal flush.
no matter what old liar held to the
contrary. Col. Johnson, who is Ari-
IONA authority on poker, ca ne around
to have a look at our man and ask
where and how we had captured him.
and he had scarcely stepped inside the
Office when the pressman lost his nerve
and began to shoot.
What was the Colonels gain was our
loss. We had 8 finger split by a bullet
the devil got rake across the skull,
and the foreman now carries his arm
IN sling. The colonel, it is needless
TO say, was untouched. When our
young man got through shooting at
everybody except the man he wanted
to hit, we assisted to take him out,
mead him for the cactus plantation,
and start him off. He won't see his
mother die-not if he keeps on in that
direction. Tenderfoots sailing in this
direction should bear in mind that our
customs, ways and habits are some
what different from those of Boston
and New York, and on arriving in this
locality they should expect to be ad-
vised and posted by citizens who can
exhibit nine graves in their private
burying grounds.