The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-06-26
BRIGHT BITS.

SHE IN sArIN-Are you glad that you got mar
ried!
She ia Silk OF course am. Why, 1 got S47
presents.-Matnsey's Weekly.
ACCORDING to Edison's last invention, the
kinetograph. you can see your sweetheart and
hear the smack even were they a mile down
the beach.--Neto York Truth.
You LOOK rather pale" said the World to
the Moon. Getting old and feeble, eh?"
II can go all around you just the same,'' re-
piled the Moon MuHsey's Weekly
MAxMA-Now, Pussie, you must go to nurse
and tell her to put you to bed; it's past O'Clock.
Pussie-No. Mummie, dear, it isn't; cook has
just told me it is only halt past.-FNn.
A DELAWARE PAPER heads an editorial,
Peaches Go Up" Evidently nature has re-
versed herself in the Diamond State. In Penn
sylvania peaches go down. Philadelphia Press.
If the new Countess of Clancarty's trades
men should attempt TO overcnarge her when
she goes to housekeeping in Belgravia she may
be relied on to do some tall Kicking. Chicago
Journal
81 AM indeed grieved to hear that your poor
husband has gone to a better world"
THANK ye, sir; but, poor dear it's just as
well. This ere cold climate never suited his
complaintl"-Jttdy.
ASKED BY SMALL BoY.--"Papa, do they have
fencing master at the Fencers' Club?"
Eyes, my boy"
And is there writing teacher at the Au-
thors Clubr'-Puck.
DISSIPATION seems to be natural. The moon
gets full, the sea gets high. the wind gets on a
tear, the trees often get on a bender, and all
nature Smiles At least they say she does.-
Nodh's Sunday Times.
DE SMARTEE-Why do you persist in buying
your clothes at instalIment housesY
De Sharppe-They always try to give me
stuff that will last until the installments are
paid.-Ne,0 York Weekly.
THE sharper who has been selling painted
sparrows for 81 apiece as Australian warblers
would be none too good to put gilt wings on
the tariff and pass 1t of as the angel of reci-
procity. - PHILADELPHIA Record.
ST FISH DIET has brain developing power
what deep thinker Jonah must have been, :"
remarks the Philadelphia Times, evidently
under the impression that Jonah swallowed the
whale PittsbtrG Chronicle Telegraph.
DEAooN-Rev. Mr.. Poundlist is the shepherd
of our flock.
Badun-And you?
"Ahl see. You are the shepherds crook p"
77Cttcd0o Journal svH
BEss-No, indeed. Belle, I didn't say that
your shoes were too small for your feet.
Belle-What did you saw
Bess-I said that your feet were too large for
the shoes.
Belle molifed)-Ol-Ydnkee Blade
,ALeERNoN-Good heavens. Marial Have you
really decided that yellow is your choice Of
color for my summer trousersi
Maria Certainly, dearest. The picnic season
has begun, and you may sit down in a custard
You generally do And the contrast is too
vivid,-PittsoIrg Bulle. tn.
Mrs. LANsNeTos--I hear your daughter was
married recsntly?
Mrs. St GIair-Yess two months ago.
"What kind of q match did she maker
20. safety match. Her husband is wogth a
million and gave her a hundred thousand as a
marriage portion. "-Detroit Free Press
"THIs is very sudden. Mr. Jawsmith." said
| the maiden, after his proposal. while feel
| honored at your avowal, you cannot expect a
| favorable answer from one who knows SO little
| Of you as II
well, what am to do, Miss MildredY'
pleaded Jawsmith. .sEone of the girls who do
know me well Will marry me. Epoch.