Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1891-01-22
WALLER JEANS JUSTICE

Twas coming up the Mississippi river
ON slow but magnificent boat, and was
sitting on the hurricane deck looking
over beautiful and seemingly endless
spread Of sugar cane land, when some
one standing near me remarked:
"You were never along here in the
sure enough days Of steamboating, 1
reckon"
/ looked up and saw tall man, to
whose appearance coming age had lent
o sort Of distinction. His clothes set
upon him with an air Of genial dis
arrangement, and his eyes, / noticed,
were moist with the dew of recollection
as he gazed far away over the fields. It
took me but second thus to estimate
him, and my answer to his question was
prompt:
'I was never along here in the old
days"
"Oh, well, then, You don't know any
thing about it. You only catch now a
poor shadow Of what was once glorious
substance" He seated himself beside
me, relighted his cigar, which had gone
out, and thus continued:
ga man that was never along here be-
fore the war don't know anything about
life. In those days the boats were pal
aces, and man in general was so accom-
modating and polite that he'd fight you
in minute. Now the boats are futter
mills, and man, instead of being gentle
manly and accommodating, will curse
you, sub. own plantation up the
river, but it don't amount to anything
now"
SIS the land worn outr asked.
"Oh, no; lands just as good as ever,
but the conditions that made life there
enjoyable have all been changed. Why,
sub, / knocked fellow down the other
day, and hanged if he didn't sue me for
breach of trust"
"For whatY exclaimed.
"For breach of trust, tell you. He
: had me arrested and hauled up before
what is known in our country as yaller
jeans justice of the peace. The fellow
stated that he had trusted me or he
shouldn't have been hit; said that if he
hadn't trusted me he would have lodged
in time, and he therefore thought that
should be dealt with for breach of trust
The yaller jeans justice said he thought
so, too, and hanged if he didn't fine
me S."
"Why didn't you appeal the case?' !
asked.
'Oh, well, you see, I'm not in the
law business. / just horsewhipped the
justice till the dust flashed out of the
yaller jeans and then let the affair
drop. l tell you," he added, after q
brief pause, "we used to have great
times along here in the old gentlemanly
days. remember one evening sort Of
preacher came aboard at landing just
about here. He was simple man, with
meek smile that seemed to have beer
mortised into his face. soon got ac
quainted with him and learned that
aside from being a preacher, he operated
aplantation and had some little money
"Among the passengers was one o.
the shrewdest gamblers I had evel
known, and when he found est that thu
preacher had money he began to lay
plans for catching him. Iwent to tht
preacher and told him. That's al
right said he. In this life it is but
natural that the wolves should be aftel
the sheep OF course You viii not play
with him. said I. 'Oh, don't know,
be answered. 4 have worked verJ
hard and am off for rest, and if he car
aid me in getting what seek all right
Some of tLs greatest Of English clergy
men, you kaow, have been quite exper
& cards, and although 1 am not a grea
clergyman, yet l am an Englishman
and am game for any sort Of innocen
amusement that may be flushed mp.
But that man Nickerson,' said I, refer
ring te the shrewd gambler, will bea
ytuF 'Oh, possibly the clergyman re
joined, but he can't beat me out o
much. Perhaps I might win from him
Don't think that I am an easy victim
ny dear sir. have had great deal 0
experience, and am not SO very easil,
ptked up
t'Well, sir, the planter continued, ssh
diln't dodge that gambler at all, bu
actually sat down to game of poke
with him. Ofcourse the preacher lost
buthe was shrewd enough not to be
ven high. The minister came up t.
me with his smile mortised in ittl
deeper, and said: We'll, he is prett
shar, and have lost about hundre,
dollas; but how are we to preach agail.s
an evil unless we know the ways Of tina
evil? In truth, aside from any attemp
/. to pee behind the mask Of evil, ] an
fond q playing cards, and if | shoui'
create my other impression Ishould b
1. .hypoGite, and hypocrite is wors
than a gambler. Do you wish to play
game? 7 Played, and away late tha
night when the preacher got off at Camp
bells Bend he carried 1900 Of my dol
lars with him. / don't know that Il
ever saw a pulpit, for found cns \ Tor
Wtrd that he and that fellow Nitsgrso
w,re partners. Oh, yes, those wsr