Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1891-12-18
A LIVING TOMBSTONE.

You see, people said Jasper Dggs was
born foolish and that he was not respOu-
sibe for his actions. His mother died in
his babyhood and he was left to take care
of himself as his father was a poor, old,
weak invalid.
Public philanthropy was almost an un-
known quantity in Pine Hollow, and the
maxim of "every man for himself WAS
rigidly conformed to by the tavern keeper,
the proprietor of the grocery and other
less influential citizens of the village. Even
the seedy looking parson was imbued with
but a picayune spirit of charity, though he
frequently found occasion in the pulpit to
stimulate and encourage charity in Others
He was once compelled to urge upon some
of his brethren, who had placed brass but
tons in the contribution box, the necessity
of desisting from hammering down the
eyes of those buttons, for while that pro-
cess did not increase their value as coin, it
did seriously impair their usefulness as
buttons.
Jasper had grown to be very stable
young man of twenty. With all his shat
tered mental faculties, affection was
most pronounced trait of his character
This was manifested in his Jealous care of
his father, whose emaciated form had lain
lOr Illduy veal lllOutAo uPOu " COuSA "a
pain, from which the poor man was never
destined to rise again. Jasper was his
nurse, his companion. If the old man
sometimes wearied of the boys vague chat
ter about a thousand nothings, of his nerv-
GUS facial contortions or his monotonous
representations, he could, after all, hear
these trifling annoyances in return for all
the kind attention of which he was the re-
cipient from the same unfortunate son.
What little remained of the old mans life
ebbed away slowly day by day until at last
his name was written in the book of NOR
tality.
"Well, old Diggs is gone" was the cur
rent expression of the older generation
that knew him best. The funeral was
plain, not to say meager, both in ceremony
and attendance. Jasper was the chief, and
if appearances were any indication. the
only mourner. Mr.. Diggs' body was con-
veyed to the cemetery and placed by the
side of Hannah, whose grave was almost
lost under the thick jungle of weeds and
wild creepers that covered it.
Affairs in Pine Hollow, of course, moved
on in their unwonted style. Mr.. Diggs'
death was soon forgotten. Jasper Diggs
remembered it but too we'll. His mourn
full sobs could be heard at night in the
cemetery, and to passers by they were any
thing but cheerful sounds.
The idea of providing suitable tomb
stone to the memory of his father seemed
to have taken possession of Jasper's mind
few days after his sire's death. Some
one suggested that the easiest way to get
enough money to purchase one would be
to go around with subscription list.
Acting upon this hint he started out on
his hopeless mission. I say hopeless, be-
cause they looked upon Jasper as more of
fool than he was; hence they treated him
far worse than he deserved. He went from
house to house, meeting only rebuffs,
sneers and ridicule. At nightfall he re-
paired to the cemetery where he slept, pre-
ferring to be near his dead father than in
the lonely cottage. He had tramped all
over the village, and he found only one
person willing to render him assistance,
and that one had signed for 81. Every
body else had refused to give anything but
his moral support. Therefore, like per-
fectly sane young man, he abandoned the
enterprise, though the Unsuitable longing
for a monument to his fathers memory
possessed him as keenly as ever.
A week later one of Pine Hollow's
misery citizens, while passing the ceme-
terry, made a strange and wonderful dis
covery He did not go into the grocery
shop that night as early as usual. in order
to allow all the frequenters to assemble SO
that he might have a good audience to
listen to what he had to say. The crowd
was laying in a stock of peanuts and plug
tobacco as he entered, and his nervous pa
thence was taxed to its utmost in refrain
ing from calling the meeting to order at
once.
"Well, boys" he began, after the eoun-
ter and every available box and barrel had
been extemporiZed for seats, you'd
laughed your gizzards sore to have seen
what | see this mornin. l was footin it
over to Hi Cassaway's to see bout him
buildin me new corn crib next week, an
as | come to the graveyard / noticed
man standin in there. Coming up closter
l recognized Jasper Diggs, poor devil!
He was standin perfectly still, an when l
got right opposite l hollered out, Hey,
there, Jasp, what yer doin? Well, be
gol dang if he stirred COMPOUNDED inch.
Then hollered agin, but he didn't move.
Sez to myself, seq 1, like as not the dumb
critters III fit or got one of his blasted
delushuns. Pll jes' go up an see what
ails him. When got around not more'n
a rod or so in front of him saw square
piece of this ere pasteboard hangln on
string around his neck. There was let
tiers on it, but as don't purtend to be
much eddecated l couldn't read 'em. Bu5
it's my opinion he's ~tryin to run Bill
Davis, the marble dealer, oppursition and
be his own tombstone"
A loud 'sguffaw" on the part of the lis
teners followed close upon the conclusion
of these remarks, and then continued
laughter augmented the hilarity.
OF course the curious visited the GENE
terry the next day and found the report
true to the letter. There stood Jasper as
motionless as the monument he was repre-
senting, his facial expression displaying a
deathlike rightly. No amount of divert
ing noises or threatening gestures changed
the fixed stare that literally poured out of
his eyes. The placard printed about his
neck bore this inscription:
To fba af