davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Los Angeles herald., 1891-12-25
CHRISTMAS CHEER.

First Turkey-What is your opinion
of Christmas, anyhow? Second Ditto
Don't ak me.-Philadelphia Inquirer.
A ring would be very appropriate
gift for Christmas belle.-Norristown
Herald.
The most useful Christmas present
this year would seem to be pair of
goloshes or an umbrella. Baltimore
American.
The cash girl in the notion store didn't
need anybody to tell her that Christmas
was coming. ng.-Merchant Traveller.
A green Christmas makes cross coal
man. milwaukee Wisconsin.
Miss Cumso-I don't know what to
give papa for Christmas present. Mrs.
Cumso-Give him one of those new
long handled umbrellas l need it ever
SO badly.-New York Sun.
What a good thing it is that Christ
mas comes once a year. We are then
able to take note of the number of mean
men whom the Lord allows to live ON
from day to day.-Kearney Enterprise.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-12-25
Still BelieYed In Santa Claus.

Faith in the Santa Claus myth hasn't
entirely faded out Of the juvenile mind,
though even the very youngest repre-
sentatiyes of the present generation are
apt to be skeptical. The proof:
Little Bettina, three years old, has a
rag doll with whom her relations are
particularly tender and sympathetic.
A morning or two ago this doll was dis
covered near the fireplace in a shocking
condition. She was black in the face
and, in fact, black al over, and the
smell Of SCOT about her was very strong.
1t was Il mystery until Bettina was in
terrogated. The condition vi the doh
made her look Il little raeful, bat she
frightened up, and said:
Il ficpered to Patty all the things /
wanted for Christmas and sent her up
the chimney to tell Santa Claus!"-Bos-
ton Transcript.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-12-25
Old Time Epicurcs.

Listen to the enumeration of good
things described by Whistiecraft to have
been served up at King Arthurs table
on Christmas day. If the list be authen-
tic, there is less reason to wonder at the
feats Of courage and strength performed
by the Knights of the Round Table:
They served up salmon. venison and wild
hoars
By hundreds and by dozens and by scores.
Hogsheads of honey, kilderkins of mustard,
Muttons and fatted beeves and bacon swine,
HeroDs and bitterns, peacocks. swan and bus
tard.
Teal, mallard. pigeons, widgcons, and, in
fine,
Plum puddings, pancakes. apple pies and GUS
tttrd,
And therewithal they drank good Gascon
wine,
With mead and ale and cider Of our own;
For porter, punch and negus were not knowA.
Christmas Book.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-12-25
Christmas, 1891.
THREE CHRISTMAS CHIMES.

Hearkeni how the Christmas chime
Sings on earth its song sublime!
''See the twain whose weary feet
Wander through the village street.
Doors are closed against the stranger
See the Child, the meek and lowly,
Christ the mighty, the all holy,
Sleeping Graded in manger."
Sing your joy. o Christmas chimel
Let us keep the Christmas time.
Be the loaf of plenty doled,
Be the poor mans heart consoled-
Thus we keep the Christmas time.
Hearken! still the Christmas chime
Sings on earth its song sublimel
Wondering shepherds see the night
Flooded with celestial light
Wondering hear the argel message:
Come and let us kneel before him.
Let us find him and adore him.
Peace on earth this child doth pres
age"
Sing your joy, o Christmas chime!
Let us keep the Christmas time.
Let all strife and hatred cease,
Kindness live, good will and peace.
Thus we keep the Christmas time.
III.
Hearkenl still the Christmas chime
Sings on earth its song sublimel
Eagerly the Magi sped
BY the wondrous star beam led,
Gold and myrrh, and incense offer.
He brings most-yes, he the highest
Draweth unto God the Highest
Who heart of love doth proffer."
Sing your joy. o Christmas chimel
Let us keep the Christmas time.
Love shall be the law to bind
In one band all humankind.
Thus we keep the Christmas time.
Century.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-12-25

Mrs. Snowden-I hear that Jimmy
Jenkins, the coachman, has eloped with
old Moneybag's daughter. Mr. Snow
den-That will tickle the old man inn
mensely. Mrs. Snowden-How so? Mr..
Snowden-W Why, the old skinfint will
get out of giving her Christmas pres
ent.-Kearney Enterprise.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-12-25

Five century plants, all in bloom, is
the interesting and very rare sight now
to be seen in Los Angeles in the garden
of the Church of Our Lady of All Angels.
They are said to be growing about foot
a day.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-12-25

A gentleman at Eastman, Ga, day
or two ago on opening freight car dis
covered hen Matching nest of eggs
which she had laid during long rail
road Journey from another state.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-12-25
O. What n Cough.

Will you heed the warning? The signal per-
haps of the sure approach of that more terrible
disease, Consumption. Ask yourselves if you
can afford for the sake of saving soc. to run
the risk and do nothing for it. We know from
experience that Shiloh's Cure will cure your
cough 1t never fails. This explains why
more than Million Bottles were sold the past
year. 1t relieves Group and whooping cough at
once Mothers, do not be without 1t. For
Plaster Sold wholesale by Haas, 3srlch &
Co., and all retail druggists.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-12-25

The new Maxim flying machine will
be propelled by a light screw making
$500 revolutions per minute. Its sus-
pending power will be kite 11O feet
long by 40 feet wide. The motive power
will be petroleum condensing engine.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-12-25
miles,s Nerve ana Liver ,p,I,..

Act on a new principle-regulating the liver.
stomach and bowels through the nerves. A
new discovery. Dr. Miles's Pills speedily cure
bilionsness. bad taste, torpid liver, piles, con.
stipation. Unequalled for men. women, chill
drep Smallest, mfldest suresti SO doses, 25
cents. Samples free, at C. Fl. Hance.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-12-25

''Render therefore unto Caesar the things
which are Casa s." and accept fact that is de-
lighting the civilized world. This is, that pain
will no more walk the earth, it Is being last
killed out with Salvation Oil.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-12-25
Our Home Brew.

Maier d Zoeblein's Lager. fresh from. the
brewery, on draught in all the principal sa-
locus, delivered promptly in bottles or kegs
Office and Brewery. ]4l Also st. Telephone 81.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-12-25

We have q speedy and positive cure for
catarrh, diphtheria, canker mouth and head
ache in SHILOH'S CATARRH REMEDY. A
nasal injector free with each bottle. Use it If
you desire health and sweet breath Price SOC.
Sold Wholesale by Haas, Baruch d Co.. and all
retail druggists
Los Angeles herald., 1891-12-25

Campbeips Curiosity Store,
325 South Spring, headquarters for Christmas
novelties.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-12-25

Horse blankets, clippers and buggy robes at
Foy's saddlery house, 315 N. Los Angeles street.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22


The baseball field is not the place
where one looks for literary wit, yes
now and then it happens that good ptt
saying is heard there which shows not
only readiness. but familiarity with ht.
erature.
II was on an occasion when a college
nine was playing the nine from a fitting
school, and the shortstop of the latter
was an absurdly tall and thin fellow
named Brown, apparently some 10 years
older than the boys with whom he WIS
associated. He played very badly.
muffing and fumbling until it was sug
gested that he was only put on the nine
for the joke of having So long man as
shortstop
"He is like the ancient mariner. one
of the college nine said; "he is long and
lank and Brown.
He is more like the ancient mar.
iner, quickly and Mittily returned the
friend TO whom the remark WIS male.
because 'he stoppeth one of three
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22

~H-h-how nl-In-m-uch f-f-for ro-To-
rooml suffered man named Petten-
gill who registered from Jackson,
Mich, at the Auditorium
@On what fioor7" asked the clerk.
~S-s-sev-en. TT th f-f-foor.
Five dollars. was the prompt reply.
Il t-t-th-in-k I'll g-g-g-g-o-"
~Wel. can give you a 50 room,
the clerk made haste to say. -and It Is
one Of the best rooms on the seventh
floor 'FRONT.' Show this gentleman to
728
The haste Of the clerk was the means
ofdepriving the Auditorium Company Of
$40, for Nr. PettengilI said afterward
he intended to say he thought he
would 60 right up. and that he would
want the room for five days
81 but t-t-the c-c-clerk d-d-did<h-
MT w-w-wa-it. !" explained the jackson
man.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22
Lamb and ,ls nurglar.

Lamb was awakened cary one Christ
mas morning by a noise i bis kitchen.
and on going down TO that apartment
found a burglar doing his spoons up in
a bundle.
why DIDO you s-s-st-t.teal2" he
asked
Because / am starving, returned
the housebreaker sullenly.
Are y-you re-re-ally ver-very h-h-
hung-hung-gug gerry hungry" asked
Lamb
very, replied the burglar, turning
away.
~Pup-pup.poor fuf-fuf fellowi' said
the essayist. IA here's l-l-leg OF LII
Lamb for y-you.
And so saying, with a dexterous
movement of his right leg lie ej.cted
the marauder into the street, and lock-
ing the door securely. went back to
bed Tie burglar confessed afterward
that he didn't see the joke for six
weeks -[Harper's Magazine.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22
A vERY CANDID APPLICANT.


why Life Insurancs Policy DId Not
Fali his Way.
A Detroitlif insurance agent recently
received letter from man in the in
terror cf the State who said he was
thinking of taking out policy, and he
asked that blank be forwarded him.
Il was returned, and the following is a
specimen of the mans honesty:
@What did your father die OFF,.
"Consumption
Your mosherg"
The anne.
Ever have heart trouble1"
Yes. very bad
"Lost any brothers or sisters by death,
and if so what did they die off"
~Lost five # them and all died Of
consumption and heart disease.
~Do you ever spit biood."
Heaps Of times.
Ever had any serious acci lent7"
~Yes. Had nearly all my bones
broken two or three times.
Memory good Z"
mo.
sleep wellf"
@No.
How's your appstite2
very poor.
Several other important questions
were answered after the same candid
fashion and the agent viii have to write
him that there is no life Insurance forso
truthful a man. IL Detroit Free Press.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22
ouIEr, bur Rrcn.
Mrs Hetsy Green's Seloura IN Humbl.
Lodgings in baltimore.


Once not very loag ago i reduced
gentle woman who keetss lsrgs board
ing house in Baltimore received a letter
from lady signing herself Mrs Hetty
Green, asking that Two rooms might he
reserved for herself and her invalid SIN,
who would be ia Baltimore for a few
days The landsady reserved the rooms
and Mrs Green and the invalid boy ar
rived in due time.
Now, tie landl:tdy was not well up IN
railroad affairs aud hadn't the remotest
suspicion that her quiet lodger was the
richest woman in the United States and
the one OF whom an editorial wag re-.
marked. at the time of the appointment
of the Interstate Commerce Commission.
that If the President wanted 10 appoint
a person VINO knew all about railroads,
Mrs Hetty Green was miles ahead of
any other railroad sharp IN the country.
Nothing in Mrs. Green's styleor manner
of living was calculated to enlighten the
landlady. She did not take the most
expensive rooms in the house. and the
only luxury she permitted herself was a
daily drive in livery stable carriage
with her crippled boy.
But in few days after her arrival
superb carriage dashed up 60 the door
and Miss Mary G rrett sent up her card.
Next came Mrs Robert Garrett, and
then the president If the Johns Hopkins
University. The Baltimore and Oaio
magnates were very anxious to be
friendly with Mrs Hetty Green. This
rather opened the landlady's eyes, but
Wien Mrs. Green appeared one evening
lressed to go TO $ endid dinner given
aer b. tie Garrett's the landlady
catce,y recognized her quiet lodger.
.ar size was nagnificently gowned and
Wore the jewels that she reserves for
very grand occasions.
Then the whole thing dawned upon
he landlady. She fou, out that the
quiet lodger was a person regarded with
espect not TO say superstitious awe, by
very railroad nlagnate in the country.
But the quiet lodger continued as quiet
Is ever and looked sharply over her
m3dest bill on leaving before payiug it.
ILLUSTRATED American.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22

He sat in the lobby Of one If our
prominent hotels. His hair was as white
as snow and matted in thin and scraggy
locks over high and creased ,rehead
Lines Of sorrow marked his face and
ran through his f.. lures rs numerous
as the rivers in central AT lea. In his
eyes there was sadness, which be pDk
weight of sorrow on the mind, and
seemed to suggest that grief had greatly
assisted time in turning the hair white
and furrowing the face. A number of
men were sitting around him and they
had been telling stories Of the ~p;stol
which had not be loaded" and its fatal
ity. The white haired man said in a
plaintive voice:
II have story to tell returned
home one day from my place of busi-
ness Everything had gone my war
that day, among tie things good many
dollars, and ] felt unusually gay and
skittish. told my wife of my good fort
une and asked her to get me a match
We were standing by dressing case.
and when she refused opened drawer
and drew forth stol, which knew
was not loaded, as had examined it the
night before. Leveling the pistol
straight at her heart-poor woman, she's
dead now-I playfully threatened to
shoot her There was a look Of trust
ing, confident love in her eyes-shalI
forget that--as she dared me. placed
my hand on the TT gger and pulled it
closed my eyes, afraid to open them.
Obi it was awful.
after time, it seemed hours,
opened my eyes and put the pistol
back.
But your wife-was she killed in
stantly9" eagerly asked three question
ers.
"No-o-o.
"A lingering. painful deaths" sympa
thetically they asked.
No; as i said the pistol was not
loaded. Ny wife was unhurt, of course.
-But you said she was dead?"
-Yes. she died about two years ago,
of old age
~And why did you tell this story7"
~To show you that there are times
when the pistol is really not loaded.
There are exceptions TO all rules, you
know. This is the one exception to the
seven instances you gentlemen have re.
cited louisville Post.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22
HE COULDN'T PLACE Hrm.
Dr. John HaIl's Memory Is Put to
strain It Failed to stand.


Dr. John HaIl's Memory Is Put 90 =
strain It Failed to Stand.
Not long ago, as Dr. John Hall was
leavi his house in Fifth avenue he
saw u young man looking at the nuns
bers. From his dress and address he
concluded that he had recently come
from the Z herald Isle. and was there
fore a fellow countryman. As he
seemed at loss to find the house for
which he was searching. DIR. Hall asked
him if he could assist him with any in-
formation.
Il am looking for DR. John Hall,
said the stranger.
II am he. modestly replied the Fifth
aver ne Clergyman.
@Are you DIR. Hall?"
II am"
"Did you come from Ireland?'
II had the good fortune TO be born
there.
Don't you know me. DR. Hali?" said
the new arrival, after a moments pause.
II regret to say that can not place
you at this moment, though / may have
seen you before
SWELL. think you have. Then he
stopped for an Instant. as if to deepen
the impression that he had made and to
prepare the minister for the startling
assertion which he al about TO make:
why. you baptized me 25 years ago in
the old country. and yet you have for
gotten me entirely.
1t was not time for levity. added
DIR. Hall in relating the incident; ~oth-
erwise might have reminded the young
man that he should have remembered
the face of one who had sustained such
an important relation to him in his early
life. New York Tribune.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22
nuase or norAL asMrEn.



Klag William III OF the Netherlands.
who died while A..o, was, in his best
days. nan OF frightfnl temper, SAYS
The New York Sun The person who
excited him alove all others was the
link, pl4legmatic ThorbecSe, mho left
the dssS cf n Utrecht professorship to
become minister of state. The king
expressed his contempt for Thorbecke
by always addre sing him as Sir Pso
fessor. In 1870, while William was
drifting swiftly toward an alliance with
France. in order that he might avenge
tile wrongs all Dutchmen feel they have
sustained at German hands, the "Pro-
fessor" was selected TO convince the
king that his people would not suppors
him in such a course. Thorbecke
entered the kings bed chamber with his
hands behind him on the morning of the
day of the decision.
-Good morning. sir professor What
is the newsa" asked the king,
Nothing special. sire; only the people
of The Hague are talking good deal of
nonsense, said 1horbecke, with diplo.
matte deliberateness.
"Humphl Concerning my ministers n
No, sire. droned on Thorbecke, -con-
cerning you
Concerning me?" shouted the king,
~and what. oh. honored professor, con-
corning me2"
-sire, / hardly wish to repeat it
-"
Eaougl.i wish to hear it /"
Well, sire, the people of The Hague
say you are as or. z as a loon.
Bifl Like shot the short, heavy
body of the king bounc from the bed
to the floor. Purple and speechless, he
caught up a great silver inkstand to
throw it at Thorbecke. His hand be-
came entangled for moment in the
bed curtains Thorbecxe strobe up to
him. thrust down his keen white face
to the level of the kings eyes, and said
in tone of icy ind ference:
"And if you strike me with the ink
stand the people of The Hague will be
right
The king dropped the inkstand in thr
curtain that had caught it and glowere
at the professor, who hastened to pile
reasons on reasons why the Netherlands
should remain neutral during the
Franco-German war; A few hours
later. in the presence of all his minis
ters, William III tore into bits and
stamped on the declaration of war
which he had all but forced on his un
willing subjects.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22

He had been bounced out of West
street saloon. and was much ruiiled.
when an observer took a step nearer and
asked;
-Throw you out r.
@Yes, threw me right outl"
ANY particular reasong"
Il haven't any money"
Il see. Well?"
aWeIl, the blooming boke didn't get
any the best Of me. and don't you forget
It'll"
did you hit him2"
"Hit himl Forty times worse than
thatl told him right IN the presence
Of five other blooming blokes that he
was no gentlemanl'
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22

Mr. Longbow (relating an adventure
with hostile Indians in the Black Hillsl
~ seized my revolvers and rushed /"
the door Of the tent, when WAS ii.-
stantly knocked down by a war club la
the hands of painted fiend.
Miss SiNmikins with fervor)- -lfow
lucky.
Mr.. Longhow-Wh-h-a-a-tl
Miss Simmikius-I mean how lucky
/ have on my cloak and muff 1t al.
ways sends the cold chills creeping
through me to listen to tale OF ad !
venture.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22
Tha FIrst step.

Perhaps you are run down, cant eat,
can't sleep, can't think, cant do any
thing to your satisfaction, and you won
der what ails you. You should heed the
warning, you are taking the first step
into Nervous Prostration. You need q
Nerve Tonic and in Electric Bitters you
will find the exact remedy for restoring
your nervous system 10 It's normal,
healthy condition Surprising result
follow the use of this great Nerve Tonic
and Alternative. Your appetite returns.
good digestion Is restored and the Liver
and Kidneys resume healthy action.
Try . bottle. Price 50cents, af City
Drug Store
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22
A Natural Indignation.

Biddy-Shur, mum. an if yez don't be
afther takin' the clock out ag ihe kitchen
Oi'll lave yez Il be afther insulting me
beau
Lady-Why. how can the cock insult
anybody
Bid ddy-Shure, and before Patrick had
heen in the house foive minutes it said:
Cook coo!"-[Jewelers' Weekly.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22

Mrs. Skinner-Great heavens, Mr. Six
aweek. what have you done9
Mr. Sixaweek--W Why. nothing.
Mira Skinuer-Have you eaten the
bottom crust Of that pies
Mr. Sixaweek-Why, yes that's bout
all there was
Mrs. Ekinner-D Didn't you know that
always kept the bottom crust for the
next pie?-[ Boston Conrier.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22
S I r "A JTSS
Retail Liquors II Wislsssl, Prices.
WE CARRY THE LARGEST STOCK OF
Al Kinds Imported land Domestic
Fine Wines and LIQUORS.

Come and convince yourself before pur-
chasing elsewhere.
We import and receive all our goods
direct. All our WHIsKIEs come direct
from UnitedssStatcs Bonded Warehouses
We are known to sell the best e.. 90 Whis-
key In the market, and are able at pres
ent to offer better article than ever be-
fore purchased for the money We are
The enty psece 6n the city where you can get
ALL KINDS Of CoRDIALs.
We believe in large sales and small prof
its. Special attention paid to all city and
country orders. Give US . call and be
convinced.
N. B.-Families supplied with Bottled
Beer ct short notice, at
STRAUSSsS
decS1y 10 Market Space
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22
FOR RENT,
$4,000
u FOR RENT. e

HOUSE On Prince George Street corner 81
Craig, belonging 70 the estate or Mrs Rgbers
silver, deceased. Apply 20
- J. WRIT RAKDAl L. Executor.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22

You have heard friends and neighbors
talking about il. You may yourself be
one OF the many who know from per
sonal experience just how good = thing
il is. Ifyou have ever tried il, you are
one of its sfaunch friends, because the
wonderful thing about ii is, that when
once given trial, DR. Kings New Disc0v-
ery ever after holds place in the house.
If you have meyer used it and should Re
afflicted with q cough, cold or any Throat
Lung or Chest trouble, secure bottle st
once and give il fair trial It Is guar
anteed every time, or money refunded.
Trial Bottles Free at City Drug store.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22

Go to 4. Hart's for Al kinds Of smok-
eK,s goods. Pipes. Cigar-smokers, Meer
chaum goods 0f Al kinds. The Writ
Fountain Pen also for sale. A. HART,
rs Maryland Avenue.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22
CLOTHING !

Before going Baltimore and get Prices and compare them
any Baltimore store and see our Prices not to 25 Per
Cent Less. We viii give you below few
lt-Our expenses only onethrd of BALTIC. stores.
2nd-We do all our own work and don't have any
fancy price clerks.
Srd-0ur Policy is Quick Sales and Small Profits
4h-We don't buy of jobbers, but direct from the
manufacturer.
5h0ur rent is not half of store Of our size would
be in Baltimore. These are general facts
Wewin only mention a few of our Bargains.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22
NOTICE.

Families supplied with the Celebrated
Niag0ra Falls Beer. Coolest in the city,
Send in your orders 70 SMITHS 81 West Street
Annapolis. Choicest Wines, Liquors and Ci-
gars kept on hand at the +. & L. RESTAU-
RANT. same number. eII
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22

The best SC. cigar ever sold in ths city
1t 4. Hart's, 70 Nd. sve.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22

All brands Of paper wrapped cigarettes
can be secured a the Central Drug Store
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22
FOR SALE CHEAP.

DESIRABLE BUILDING LOTS on
Conduit Street and on Market Street -
These are the only lots now available in
this section of the city. Apply to
f. EUGENE WATHEN.
j9 Attorney at Law, 10 Church Circle
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-01-22
PANTS DEPARTMENT..

Great many but not to mention.
Va Gents Furnishing Goods Department stocked its fullest
hats we have anyhing want in the Hat line Remember
moi guarantee how long these Prices will they viii
& @ goods We duplicate these goods for these prices
S. SPANDAUER.
The Leader Of Low Prices,
IS MAIN STREET.