Butler citizen. [volume] (Butler, Pa.) 1877-1922, 1891-05-08
West sunbury Correspondence.


John Shulrs little yellow dog. But don't
want to discourage him, want him to
keep on if he can't be Longfellow he mite
eit to the other end an be the Shortfellow.
He sined his name s'pose that's for
Tomcat.
Our old spreckled Tomas cat,
Out on the garden fence he safe,
He did not see the yelpen cur
That stood behind the wicket gate.
The cur he watched the pussy cat.
A easen ON the shinen ball.
The cur he yelped. The cat he sed,
Yum yum, an that was all.
Well Mr.. Citizen, the people hears bin
cxrrion on dredful lately, can stan most
enything, holes in the street an brush an
logs an blacksmith shops dumpen ground
IN old stables and rotten fences an dirty
ugly yards and sich things and You know
that's purity hard to stan, but when II
comes to tinkern with the meetin' house
preachin' it nocks me out on the first
round. I have been . member of the
Methodist meetin' house for nigh onto forty
year an was deacon before cum here
and took up the tin too, but never hearr
Of sich work before an my son Jerry that's
been away to college sed he never heard
of sich thing neither. 1t happened sum
thin like this: The parson what we had
had to leave for his health, it pears he lef
it sumwhere, and the presiding elder sent
rs parson to ELL his place till they'd have
meeting. Well this man it pears is {
fielder and don't belong to the conference
So we got up 8 petition an sent to th'
elder requesting him not to forward thii
man. that we would not support him mo-
Let him into the house neither. Well tht
elder went ON In the face Of that petition
m sent him. 80 he cum an sum Of then
locked the door and wouldn't let him in
Well thot that was goin little tn fur bu
i had sined the warrent an he'd tn stick
Wei he cum back last Sunday tn preacf
whether they opened the dore or not, bu
| the dore was locked an the gates all locked
with padlccks. Vel he'd repented o'
| what he'd dun an went rite tn the par
son an took his hand an sed ses Mr.. Par
son lie stick tn You An did. Vel sir yor
beleave me that psrson preached out or
the steps an he'd quite crowd tn. Wei
went to hear him an took me son Jerry
whats bin away tn college along, an tole
him tn watch close an see how he liked
him, IN he did an he sed he he'd purity
good delivery to be . feslder an thot be
was as good as they could git there an
think so tn. It beats me why the rest
don't come ont on his side tn.
You no rs Hethodists beleave we can
keap all the tournaments an ar still gitten
more erase but think that's fallen from
erase purity fur. don't no what We will
du yit about IL ime afrsde thear will be
trubble. He is goin tn commense meatens
next Monday mite don't no which him or
the devil get the best of it yit.
Wei got appointed intu the counsel but
we heven't he'd any meatens yit will hev
one this weak think and lie tel you all
about it. Yours truly, HAY SEED.
ITEMS.
Rennie Halstead and Elry Caldwell were
home over Sunday.
Several of the students were down to
Butler to see the circns on Monday.
Origen McCandless, John Thompson and
their sweethesits went to Grove City to
hear the noted pianist, on last Friday
night.
The concert given by the Choral Uuion
last night was . decided success and the
students esteem their teacher, Miss Eva
Coulter, so highly that they presented her
with . beautiful chair. Rev. Broaden
made the presentation speech.
ANOTHER ANSWER TO HAY SEED.
One would almost think after reading
the articles of Hay Seed that the mantle of
josh Billings had fallen on his shoulders
but it does not take very critical exami-
nation to dispel that opinion. Josh Bill
lings' wit did not depend on his peculiar
spelling for he was humorist in spite of it.
Of conrse "Hay Seed has q grievance;
fellows of his sort always have whom they
rush into print, but the real trouble is that
his stock Of talk is too large for his intel
lectuals. His mind is already trained
down too fine, and if no does not allow
himself some relaxation we who know him
best fear the worst. He is also afflicted
with two incurable complaints-Pesnmism
and Egotism-but with q spring diet of
sour-dock and dsndelion he may yet see
that Sunbury 10 not half bad place, and
his uncslled for slurs with at least part of
the contempt with which they are held by
our people generally. In addition take
care of your brains ~ and swear off writ
ing and talking about things you know
nothing about. Don't pose as a reformer,
as 1t is not in the nature of Mugwump to
be one; read something light; study the
speeches of Jeremiah Sockless Simpson,
then take rest during the heated term,
but do not inAict any more such stuff on
q long suffering public. N.