The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1891-06-10

as much of a surprise 10 the bloody beast
as that daring leap had been to him.
Newman now was regaining his strength
rapidly and a few evenings afterward We
were sitting on the gallery, the moon was
at It's full, the stars were shining as only
the stars can shine in a high altitude and
through pure, clear atmosphere. All
nature seemed 80 quiet; indeed holy
calm had settled down upon mountains
and canyons and ones very being seemed
permeated with the deliciousness OF abso-
Lutte rest. / was going away on the NOR
row and doubtless this thought, the break
ing up OF our long association and the
drifting back again into our respective
channels. the working out of life's prob
lens, each for himself, engaged our refiec-
tons. and thus for a long time, If silence
Is golden" we must have been exceedingly
rich. Newman finally broke this dream
ing quiet peace by saying:
'Since began to recover how often l
have lived over and over again the days
and years long gone by. and summing it
all up | declare that l am nothing but a
broken and empty vessel.
For many years the running sands Of
my life were glittering gold, but l fear
sometimes now that all the white and
scarlet lines have been written, and that
hereafter the gray and sombre only will
fill up the pages of my oncoming years
Not because | have lost my courage or
that hope, the last rampant usually to sur
render has died out within me, but for the
reason that sometimes l seem to have
reached that point in the highway where
the climbing is exceedingly rough, and so
my feet grow weary and my limbs become
unsteady, and vet ] have every incentive,
every on-spurring encouragement, low
ing devoted wife who has unbounded
faith in me, and two delightful daughters.
| never had political aspirations, though
more than once alluring channels invited
me to walk therein. ! was ambitious only
to succeed in my profession and to become
a useful member of society, scattering
only good seed and making smooth the
pathway OF those | loved and who were
all of life to me.
"Do you know. when l look back the
years meted unto me seem but a tangled
web, for / have been drifted like the sands
by currents over and beyond me. When
| was eighteen, and two years within COM
pieting my collegiate course, the cruel
war came on. My plans were then well
settled and the pathway had purposed to
tread WIS well defined. My profession
was chosen, and | had my arrangements
all made to study law under one of the
ablest and most brilliant jurists in the
South as soon as left college. had gone
even little farther in matters 'momen-
tous grand, for 1 had proposed to a little
girl. with deep gray eyes, and hair as black
as the ravens wing, and she had accepted.
and many be the hours. at our old trysting
place down by the brook, that we had
builded castles in the air and counted
over and over again the years, months and
even DAYS until we should take up the
burdens of life together. As you know.
all the available men South, young and
old entered the army, and unwilling to be
less patriotic than my companions, so did
], and | met grim visaged war face to face.
Twice | was wounded and once left on the
field of battle for dead. From the ranks [
won honorable promotion, but | went
down with our cause, my face to the foe,
and while l looked out upon our DESC
lated, war-swept and impoverished coun-
try, | still had faith in her people, in their
recuperative powers, and believed she
would rise, phGniX-like, from her ashes.
"And thus across the preface of my
young life the deadly lines of great hopes
crushed out had thus early been written,
and all my patrimony had been swept
away in 'Sherman's great march to the
sea- l felt now that | must cast anew my
lines and walk in a pathway hereunto un-
thought OF by me, as 1t promised greater,
or at least earlier, remuneration. | talked
it all over with my little sweetheart, and
as | could neither offer her fortune or
even promise her early promotion in So
ciety 1 suggested that her hand and heart
were once more at her own disposal. But,
true TO a woman's nature when if self
sacrifice is required she never fears to
walk where angels dare not tread she de-
clared, for better, for worse was my troth,
and in due time publicly it shall be so pro-
claimed, and then, encouragingly, she
continued: 10 your work, whatever that
may be, and will keep the fire burning
upon the altar, and whenever you want an
helpmate here you will find heart and
hand for any fate And thus matters
were settled, and | went away
to distant city and studied
medicine with a zeal worthy OF so great
profession.
For the first year l abandoned society
entirely. Alter that at the earnest solicit
tation of u fellow-student | occasionally
became the escort OF young lady cousin
of his. For some reason, unaccountable
to me then. noticed that he invariably
made provision for her or else accompan-
led her himself | told him in the begin
ming OF my engagement, and that my
going into society at ali was more to ac-
commodate him. as he seemed so earnest
about it, than to crafty my own wishes.
The young lady however was very prepo-
sessing, an accomplished musician and
had keen taste for literature. Her par
ents were wealthy and she lived in an ele-
CANT home and possessed the happy fac
ulty OF making her friends enjoy it. 1t
would be unnatural to say that
in time did not become verv much at
tachdd 20 her, but believed she knew Of
my engagement, and hence never dreamed
of her misconstruing my attentions,
though | do not remember that | directly
told her so. | often said to her, however,
that she must not refuse other company
on my account, for was simply acting in
the nature of 'supply'-a kind OF super
numerary to be called for in emergencies.
And thus our acquaintance began and
continued until our friendship ripened, at
least blossomed upon the border land of
more sacred things, and in time learned