davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-07-16
A Rad CnA

Yesterday afternoon fourteen-vear
OLD lad named Hemrickhouse, who lives
at the corner OF Nineteeth and Jacob
streets, received an ugly cash in ths Ios,
arm while at work at the Whitaker
mill. 1t was caused by another how
throwing him piece OF sbarn shay 10y
iron. 'Aoo'
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-07-16

Next Thursday, July 16, via the -
40. R. R., round trip rate $40. Iiek !,
els good ten days, and good to stop on
4 Washington City, returning. trains
.eaye Wheeling at 1905 and 4;oo a. NJ
'ad 2:35 and 6:1O p. m. Secure sleep
Dg car space at once.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-07-16
Music In the Woods.

For the accommodation Of those VINO
gay wish to attend the cantata VI
SSleen Esther at Moundsville Assemo =,
SAl' July 16, II and IS, the B. d U. VIII
IN special train, leaving camp
"0unos at 10 p. N. for Wheeling.
16, II, Is
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-07-16
THE NEWS OF THE DAT.
Seriously Injured.

Geo. Wise, an employe of Paige carav
q Co, was seriously injured whiIa :,
work at Caldwel's Run, Tuesday after =.
noon. He was taken to his homo sa .
DIR. Frissell, the company's nhvs,c; Inu
summoned, who dressed his wounds
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-07-16
The Defendant Gets Sc, 600.

The commissioners in the condemna-
ton proceedings OF the Wheeling Bridge
and Terminal Company VS.. Mrs. Mary
HandIan, yesterday awarded the defend
ant 8, 900.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-07-16
DIED.

SMITH-Wednesday, July 18th, 1891, at two
O'Clock p. m, HAZEL, infant daughter OF Charles
W. and Kate Smith, aged month and ID days.
Funeral this Thursday afternoon Mt O'Clock,
from the home OF her parents, corner Of Fink
and Elm street
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-07-16
married.

BELL-CHARNOCK-On July 18th, 1891, al
the parsonage Of the Fourth Street NJ. L.
Church, by the pastor. c. W. Cushing, Mr.
GEORGE BELL 10 Miss JESSE L. CHARNOcK.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-07-16
ron TaREE DAYS ONLY.

ox. Cream india Lawn s l-3c.
so0 .rsn.a Orrandy Lawn 9 i-4c.
,s,-ac American Chaiiies 90.
Ii n. EMSHEimkh'
ss..A "a Hleventh Street.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-07-16
Beu-Charnock.

A very pretty wedding ceremony was
solemnized, in the parlOr of the Fourth
Street M. Z. parsonage, yesterday
afternoon, in which the contracting
Dsrties were Mr.. Geo. w. Bell, and
Miss Jessie L. Charnock. The cere-
mony was performed by Rev. G. W.
Cushing. Only a few intimate friends
we're present. At the conclusion OF the
ceremony %S, the party entered carriages,
oDd were driven to the home OF the
brides parents on South Market street,
where a splendid wedding dinner was was
discussed. Mr.. and Mrs. Bell lels las.
evening for Canada on their Weuu I;s 3
toUr T2non their return they will reside
on the south Side. The groom is mem,
he her of the firm of Bell Bros, the coal
o one and the bride is the accom-
O oiisbed daughter of Mr.. Benjamin Char.
p,ST She has been teaching school at
CsIdwelps run for several terms
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-07-16
,.s. Rall Notes.

The Etnaville Juniors uev nv
n,ol n nine Yesterday at Bridgeport oy
score Of 10 TO II. >, n,,o ~ hear
IL, Inc The % Athletics Of Benwood for a
game of base ball, on SUNDAY Gon a r. ac-
NEXT, or the following Sun 1ay,srrp
cented answer through the REaisI H.
The Young Actors and Fort he III,
base ball clubs crossed bats , on ' Vonng
. oSSs grounds yesterday. The Young
yer t.Srs we're defeated by score OF TO D
1 Aeso tso s of the game were the pat
. Inc ~ Heating and pitching OF moran 1ana
tihk s,' " Fort Henrys. Batteries ior rors
81 gsD nv nine, Moran and Keasins' i0'
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-07-16
Health Officers Quarterly Report

MORTALITY STATISTICS OF THE CITY
30, 1891 Deaths from all causes. 35. Proper
ton in 1000 OF population, 1924. Deaths same
quarter last year. x7s. Males, 1853. Females, ib3
White 2oS. Colored, IL. Not given. 4.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-07-16
a1e,u Advertisements.
DUBLIC NOTICE.

desire to notify all patrons OF Louis Ernst
deceased, that the ice business viii be conduct,
ed as heretofore under my supervision. All &C
counts due him and all debts owed him will be
settled by me. Respectfully,
MARIA ERNST,
iy15s Administrative OF Louis Ernst.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-07-16
~ Change the Survey.

netition will be presented 10 Vno
commissioners of Belmont County, ONO,
~ their September session asking ior d
cbe nee in the survey of the pike from
ReIiaire to West Wheeling so as TO i4l-
low tbe river road instead OF along 'n !s
hin hin side When the road was iald IL
was not known that land was so valuS a
HE along the hill side, but since the te -
t tim Of the owners and others as 70 70
the yalue and great damage 'ne
o Cnu will sustain by the loca-
ton Of road through it, there Is =, d
General c,on conviction that it woIlo DC
wrong 10 use land so very valuable ana anG
discommode its owners so seriously anu aho
S Sence this movement to change Inc
iocation OF the road. Aside from ' .n,S
i IL Is believed that the pike on the river =,
road would yield much more S revenue revenue
toc it would catch the Wneehn :
trsSel over the upper ferry, whereas IL
,aid mon the hillside this traVel. en m -,
ia,u dpO Of the year, would evadefoll by
travelling the present road.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-07-16

dor RENT-A LARGE BUSINESS ROOM.
II now being constructed, fronting 81 feet on
Main street and the same on Market Square,
and 200 feet on Tenth street. III IL cannot be
rented as whole II will be divided 10 suit ten-
ants. The cellar and the second story each be.
ing 200 by 81 feet, are also FOR rent Enquire OF
JAS l.. HAWLEY. 1920 Mnin street. leA
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-07-16

ITO PRINTERS-FoR SALE-Two ROLLER
i Moulds, enc inches In diameter and ~
inches long; one 2 feet long and "a inches Ia
diameter. Also set OF chains ana shafts for
connecting folders with cylinder presses. APP
ply At this office. Je23h
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1891-07-16

dor RENT-FARM CONTAINING rs Acres;
II good land for gardening and farming pun
poses on Caldwelrs Run, six miles from Wheel.
Ing; good dwelling house and outbuildings; two
orchards and ali kinds Of small fruits, excellent
we'll For further particulars apply TO the
owner on the premises. WIDOW LOhMAN.
iysb
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25
THE ARIZONA KICKER.
THE CURRENT ISSUES TALES or
BLOOD AND THUNDER.
How Hank Curtis, the Bloodshirssy
Cowboy Came 90 subseribs-The
Court House Ring AFTER she Editors
scalp weekly Crop OF Humorous
Paragraphs


PERsoNAIs--We never speak OF ourself
I'm the columns of our own paper when
we can possibly avoid IL. IL is not in
good taste for an editor of "a great
journal 70 do so. We shouldn't do SO
ON this occasion II not forced To in
order 20 set certain rumors at rest.
About a year ago Major A. Hoyt
Dudley struck this town with his fam.
lily. lie subscribed for the Kicker and
all went well for time. He was made
Assistant County Clerk. and 1t was not
until he began 10 get drunk and light
his cigars with deeds and mortgages
that we had anything 10 say. He
felt revengeful for our remarks
and in order 20 get even with
us gave grand party one
night last week and cut us dead. Not
only that, but he Dragged of IL and SO
did his wife. The idea was 10 belittle
and degrade MS in social way. but we
don't think any one will try II ON
again. We tclegraphed up TO Joliet
that the Major was here, and day be-
fore yesterday he was taken back 10
serve out the other two years OF his
service. We understand that his wife
Is furious because we also learned tina.
she used To perform in beer hall con-
cert i'm Philadelphia, but we can't help
IT, They set out 20 slay and got Stayed,
and must make the best of IL. We
never attack any one, but If stepped on
we always seek 10 make IL hot for the
steppist.
FEw PLAIN Beng on this
subject and not wishing 10 refer TO IL
again, we wish 10 say few words To
our home readers. The question IS
often asked. who is the leader of
society in this town." We desire TO
settle that question right here and
now. We are There isn't the slight
est doubt that we are the
only man i'm this town using per-
fumed soap, to0th-btnsh and having a
white shirt which buttons behind. We
are the only one, so far m we can
learn, who has regular summer socks,
eats with fork. or knows 20 what use
60 put a table napkin. We don't brag
OF these things We were brought mp
that way. and It's perfectly NATURAL.
We are gentle and refined. No one
ever saw us cxcpectoratc on the floor
while dancing, and we don't want Il
bricl-laycr's trowcl 20 eat ice cream
with. We trust this will settle the
question ut once and forever.
The OTHER SDE.-We understand
that Hank Curtis Is telling everybody
in town that we tried TO murder him
the other day because he refused 20 re-
new his subscription 10 the Kicker.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

There may be few people In town
who don't know that Hank IL the
greatest liar in Arizona. and for their
benefit we will give our side of the
story.
We met Hank on Apache avenue and
told him that his subscription had ex-
pired lie claimed 90 be SO hard up
that he could not renew. We advised
him 10 take less whisky and more
Kicker, and he received IL In laughing
good-natured way. We have habit
when talking with man ON the street 81
putting our hands on his shoulders and
pushing him backwards IL simply
arises from our earnestness and Is gen
orally understood that way. Hank,
however, pretended that he thought we
were going 90 assault him and he
reached for his gun, Before he could
get IL we had him covered. and he gave
us n dollar 20 renew his subscription
and begged our pardon for being 50
hasty. That's all there was TO II, and
he is very silly TO go around lying about
the matter.
Nor THE MAN. Yesterday we re-
ceived very pleasant call from Col.
O'Ncill, who keeps the Golden Eagle
saloon on Cactus avenue His erranc
was 10 subscribe for two copies OF the
Kicker and To insert the ad. TO be found
on tho fourth page, bat II incidentally
came ont that-we placed him In falls,
position before the public last week. II
will be remembered that we had an
item about man having his
ear bitten OF In the saloon
and OF calling the place hcll-hole
and Col UNeill duffer who ought h
be swung up 90 n limb. IL seems we
were mistaken. The man had his ear
bitten off by a mule over ut Grass Val
ley. and Col O'Neill gave him whisky
20 battle the wound as he came along
To the saloon. e.Golden Eagle also
turns out 20 be first~class place, and 1,
run as quietly and deeently as cotton
factory. We are glad TO hear this. and
take this opportunity OF correcting the
error which we fell into.
WV SHALL sEK---we understand thai
the court-house ring, which has vainly
tried 70 nee 'this paper as an organ, Ia,
declared that we shall nsver hold ar
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

Where the cowbny comes from is q
mystery. lie Is often OF Mexican
origin. and moro than half Indian. lie
Is democrat always; he lives under
the dag Of q republic. and knows IL
Ile recognizes no social superior In
any man; bat. on the other hund. 10
those he considers his interiors. rs tho
Indian or negro. no arlsiocrat or arts
tociats could be laughter. lie IS
brave TO fool-hardiBess, and will take
chances OF his Lie that it would seem
none but a crazy man would. He takes
no manner oi care OF his health. When
a long way from the camp or ranch.
he sleeps whore night finds him on tho
open prairie. with only the stars for
light Ho bathes when he has time.
and ents and drinks anything he can
get. and al he can get. He can be de-
pended upon 20 do his work well. be IL
AZ camp or when driving in a big
bunch of horses from the ranges to the
ranch. He is strong as an OK. has an
unbounded love for gay trappings. and
IL generally gay and free from care
His chief characteristic Is a profound
contempt for the denizen OF the east
whom he calls tenderfoot. The cow
boy might not shine ON Fifth avenue.
says llarper's Weekly. but he is found
just the proper person for tho ranch.
and he Is withal very picturesque.
very useful. and very natural man.
Tho wages paid him are small. and arc
usually expended rs the first oppor-
tunity presents itself He thinks not
OF the morrow. He Is creature OF
to-day. He Is tho same cowboy that
Mark Twain knew and he Is no differ
ent when driving tho beoves In Kansa,
or the bunch Of horscs on the prairies
Of Dakota and tho Northwest.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

ofice In this town. IL may be proper
for us. in view Of this declaration. 10
define our position. We are fitted by
nature and education TO make the best
mayor this town ever had OF will. have
IL we don't get v. We want the Office.
IL properly belongs to ms. because
We have the dignity and education
TO grace II. five were mayor and the
governor came here he would be re-
ceived In manner TO do him proud
and To make our own people proud o.
It's mayor. All our mayors for five
years past have been set OF drunken
and ignorant galoots whom every de
cent honest man was ashamed of. i.
is time that decent honest man lilS'
us was put at the head -
municipal affairs. and we say
plainly that we mean To get there.
IL the ring sees fit Co oppose us the
members thereof must abide the consc.
qnences. AS 20 the city printing. tina:
will of course come TO the Kicker, and
there will also be considerable job work
to be done; that, however, il OF second
airy Importance. What the people want
is sober, honest. educated man-one
even tit TO grace the halls OF Congress
or TO hold down the chair of a governor
They have found such man in us, AID
we shall be nominated and elected
without doubt.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25


Cultivated 10.
One OF the most abundant and most
toothsome plants Is the 'homeiy weed
called pussy, says writer In the New
York Herald. As table vegetable
Il Is not to be despised. The succu-
lent stems with their leaves. are
boiled tender and dressed with butter
the same as spinach. The French
market gardeners cultivate IL regularly
and have different varieties The
young plants are used as a salad ana
are very good when served with
bacon dressing and one or two hard
boiled eggs. chopped find and sprinklei
over the salad. Pussy flowers arc
sometimes called wax pinks. When
the plant is full grown the thick.
feshy stems are stripped of THEN
leaves. tied into punches and served
as asparagus. The leaves are cooked
as spinach and by many are consid-
cred superior TO that vegetable.
A story is told OF Benjamin lie Feyrc
In connection with pussly. At his
Ohio home the genial ex-congressman
had vegetable garden, which the
more he cultivated the more luxuri-
antly grew pussly. He finally gave
up tho attempt Mt gardening and per-
mit,ed the pussly to monopolize the
premises He was one day bcmoan-
ing his IN luck at trying to raise veg
etablcs from government seeds. and
was roundly accusing the agricultural
department OF putting up packages OF
pussly seeds instead OF beet seeds.
when friend informed him that as
an article OF food the pussly was moro
valuable than the beet Whereupon
the distinguished gardener tele-
graphed to his head man 70 weed out
the beets and cultivate the pussy.
The order was carried out. much TO
the surprise Of the man of all work.
who never before heard OF any one
eating pussly.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

A worn-ont boat upon tho shore.
The chiidren's playground IL Is now.
The troubled deep IL tempts no more,
II lies at rest like rusty plow.
And yet IL basks I'm bright noontidc,
IL echoes gladly childish voices;
A sailors wife leans here. and wide
Her outlook till hsr heart rejoices.
Here lovers meet when dusk draws near.
Their voyages have scarce begun;
All may they keep vows true and dear,
Until their resting days are won.
For Ills not every craft that lies
SO calmly on IA kindly shore,
And tits not every heart is wise
To cherish, love when youth Il o or.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25
EYEGLASSES FOR CATTLE.
Thousands OF Animals Wearing Immense
Goggles tn Austria

Thousands OF Animals Wearing Immense
Goggles la Austria
At tho suggestion OF DR.. Vcrincourt
OF the department OF agriculture OF
Russia "a large number Of farmers have
had recourse 10 blue spectaclcs in or
der 20 preserve the sight Of their herds
OF cattle and in one province over a.
900 animals mcander bout with tho
aid Of blue glasses
This has been found necessary be-
cause the reflection OF the light upon
the snow has been so binding that tons
OF thousands OF cattle have been at
tackled with ophthalmia.
According TO n dispatch from Vienna
TO the London Times, the entire supply
Of Vienna has been exhausted. and IL
has been found necessary 10 obtain add
ditional supplies from Paris and Lon
don.
An English farmer. In Vienna,
says that the sight OF thousands OF cat-
tie cropping their way through tho
snow with their eyes incased la i'm
mense goggles Is one that can neither
be imagined nor adequately described.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25
By InstnIInent..

Miss Prentice What do all those
signs | see ia the cars mean? How do
you Get n Home on the lnstallmcnt
plan?"
Tom Dewitt-First you get house,
then you get a wife. and then-the other
instalhnents complete the home.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25
A Candid crisre.

"Well, what do yon think 81 my pict
ure at the academy of design" asked
young MahlsticlS OF Jones the other
day
Fair, dear boy, fair; but now you
ask me | must confess liked your
earlier style better"
Earlier styleg"
Eyes; when You didn't paint at all,
you know"
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

Train Robber t''going through Pas
scngerl-- Well, ! swow Got "a gun in
your pocket, hev ye? If il wasn't for
my pressing engagements I'd turn ye
over TO the town authorities just ahead
for carrying concealed weapons with
out a permit
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25
Ancestral Comparisons.

Miss Blewbludd proudly r. My
grandfather was Virginia Taylour.
Ncwby Indeed, Well TO be equally
candid, mine was Jersey City
butcher.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

The commerce OF New South Wales.
one OF the Australian provinces. In
proportion To It's numbers Is three times
that OF Canada, FIVE times that OF
France. and eight times greater than
the trade OF the United States.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

"Nursin' amt what II used 10 be-
said Mrs. Camp. They fix up all
their medicine so nice nowadays that
there amt no fun In maxim people
take IL ut all. "--Indianapolis Journal
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

Miss Cropper How do they tell the
age OF horse.
Jack Crupper. by the teeth
Miss Cropper oh, yes; whether they
are artificial or not.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

The roe deer Is the smallest and
most nearly domcstlcated Of the three
species which inhabit Germany. II Is
likewise the most beautiful, and It's
flesh Ia the daintiest venison known 10
the epicure.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25
Men.

Men are but bullets by fair Nature shot
Aimed at the Target OF Successes Human.
Her frequent misses show that Natare's
not
A better shot than any other woman.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

Mr.. Stayforever--'I admire Bull
finch; he has 40 much go 70 him. ="
Miss Smllax--"Yes. wish there wore
more like him. boston Courier.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

Pluto. - You look serious to-day, Cere-
bus.
Ccrebus Yes. | wish ! had been
born triplcts.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

''What Is the cause OF Dumley's sud-
den popularity Mt the club?"
Ssh. Don't let IL go any further. lie
was caught cheating ut cards"
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

Morrison Essex-IIow Is that piece
OF real estate you had?
Rutherford Paterson-Oh nv, yes;
that has been taken of my hands,
Morrison Essex Ali Have YOU
used --?
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25
IsconomIraIIy speahIng.

Somo day you'll be old aud hating;
salt your dollars while you're clever.
Most pickles are made by sailing.
But financial pickles n-vef.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

Some OF our people who experience
so much difficulty In keeping up APP
pearances should try n hand at keep
ing down expenses. Epoch.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25
In Tic Yernncninr.

"Dr. Bridgman has deserted the Bap-
lists"
Eyes; he's got in ont OF the wet at
last"
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25
All ti,e same.

Ibid whisky lead him astray."
"No; IL sent him a-rye.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25
An Arter,honght.

God save the Quecn"-until the
Prince is dead.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

"will he Marry Herw Is the title OF
. serial story. What Is the jury's
verdictp--New York Recorder.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

Rose Hawthorne says that Emerson's
memory became 80 weak at last that
he used 70 go out looking for himself
In the streets OF Concord.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1891-07-25

The man who knows he was one kind
OF fool yesterday often has n suspicion
he = some othsr Kind Of fool to-day
Rams Horn.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-09-04
Lemon Elixir.

Pleasant, Elegant and Reliable.
For billlousness and constipation take
Lemon Elixir.
For fevers, chills, and malaria, take
Lemon Elixir
For sleeplessness, nervousness and
2alpitation of the heart, take Lemon
Elixir.
For indigestion and foul stomach, take
Lemon Elixir.
Fer all sick and nervous headaches,
take Lemon Elixir.
Ladies', for natural and thorough or
yanic regulation, take Lemon Elixir.
Dr. Mogley' sI.emon Elixir will not fail
you in any of the above named diseases,
all OF which arise from torpid or
diseased liver, stomach, kidney or bowels.
Prepared only by DIR. Motley, Atlanta,
Ga 80 cents and LOO per bottle, at drug
gists cod i coy.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-09-04

Professor Qecturing)-In conclusion !
would instance mental alteration, "a mania
TO which the learned are frequently sub
ject, and occasionally make themselves
ridiculous without knowing it. After
saying which the professor took, instead
of his hat, the lamp shade off the bracket,
put it on his head, and walked out.-Bos.
ton Post.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-09-04
Amateur Presentation.

A dentist, whose stories are always
founded on facts, tells of negro who
came TO him with his wife 20 have ons
Of her teeth extracted.
Gas being something whose mysteries
added to its charms, the solicitous darby
questioned: Couldn't you gibe hen
suffin' a little milder'n gas, doctah'
Couldn't you gibe her gasoline 2"