The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1891-10-03
PuNoENr PARAGRAPHS.

PuNcENT PARAGRAPHS.
Sunshine Is better than medicine.
And you. don't have to pay $3.50 for
five cents worth of it, either. = Rich
mond Recorder.
When lightning tries to be funny it
Is very liza lie to make even. the strong
est oaks split their sides = Baltimore
American.
Most Remarkable.-"Wh did you
say was the most remarkable thing
about my last poem?" THAT it was ac-
cepted. Yankee Blade.
-Irate parent-s'Young man, whit
did You mean by taking my daughters
hand just now" Ratified swain You
are mistaken, sir. Search me. Primes
ton Tiger.
SO many people are like the fire.
cracker; they can only make big
splurge and noise in the world at the
expense of being hopelessly busted. -
Atchison Globe.
IF there is any luck in horseshoes a
good many people are of the opinion
than it is not when they are fastened to
the feet of the horses they bet on
Philadelphia Times.
Job once said the ostrich was the
most foolish of all animals. The man
who takes pug dog out for its morn
ing walk was not allowed to exist in
Jobs tiine.-N.. Y. Recorder.
Representative you heard of the
terrible scandal in Boston," Cubleigh
mo. What is it?" Pupson-''Oneo of
the ladies of the literary set mispro-
nounced word. Iowa Topics.
The Silver Lining. Miss SIT is
dreadful that all your furniture was
burned up in that fire in your fiat, Mr..
Smith" Mr.. Smith-s'Yes, it was pretty
bad; but, then, we got rid of the
reaches. Truth.
Young Husband-''My dear, bust
ness reverses have caused me to make
an assignment and" Young Wife
(tearfully)-"Y-e-s" Young Husband
1--WE will 60 abroad and travel year
or two. Epoch.
-Father-'I wish you would not lace
SO tight. 1t is positively inhuman. "
Daughter-"Why, thought you would
be pleased. father. The material for
this dress cost 81 yard. Cloak Re-
view.
-"You have spurned mer' he cried,
bitterly. II will go into the world
will fight and win. Ny name shall be
known and my riches envied-
"Then," he interrupted, try me
again. Christian at Work.
NJ Sa1fvro1o ssTs11 bova - ov,<
down your salary about 20 per cent Mr..
johnson" Mr.. Johnson-''But why?
Is not my work Just as well done as
ever?" "Ye-es, l guess so; but I've
just found out that You are one of these
college graduates. indianapolis Jour
nal
"A Rapid Recovery. = "Wonderful
cure in the case of Smalledgc." "What
was it?" ''Why, you see his legs were
paralyzed, he hadn't walkeda step in five
years, and out of sympathy they made
him cashier of the Lone Star bank. y
''Well?'' ''Well, in exactly two weeks
he skipped. "-Elmira Gazette.
-Reassured.-I hear that Mr.. Stacy
spoke rather slightingly of me the other
evening" You're very much mis-
taken. Mr.. Stacy never says anything
against person. Ionce heard him say
that if he couldn't speak in ones favor,
he'd keep silent No; your name wasn't
mentioned.-N. Y. Sun.
Gus Was in No Danger.-sI say"
said Gus de Jay, as he laid the paper
across his knees, this article says that
a food of intelligence is going to sweep
the country" swell. deah boy. don't
let it worry you" replied Willie Wish
ington you're not likely to be any
food sufferer, you know. "-Washington
Post.