davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1891-06-25
The Story ola Book Clerk.


Mark Twain told me a,good story
the other day, says the New York
correspondent Of the Buffalo Courier.
1t Illustrated his point that all the
clerks in our book stores are not
we'll informed in, literary matters
The humorist's wife. and friend
recently Went into a book store in a.
city of good size, not many miles
from New York. Accosting a. clerk
Ms. Clemens said. that her friend
desired to secure a.. copy OF Taine's
"Ancient Regime.'''
-. "Beg PARDON" said the clerk; :"wha t
book did you saW"
Mrs: Clemens repeated the. authon
and title of the book.
Going to the rear of the store. the
clerk soon returned, only to. inquire:
MAY ask you,ta repeat the name
OF the author?" ..<-..:- =,
"WhN Taine, "replied Mrs. Clemenss
becoming a little annoyed. ..... ,
Assuming an, air OF superior knowl4
edge, and looking at his customers
with a. piteous, glance ofsympathy,. he
ventured to Mrs Clemens:
>. "Pardon noe, madame, but you,
have the name a trifle wrong. You,
means Twainr-not Taine." ...-
And, it takes Mark Twain to taA. tho:
story.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1891-06-25
Reforming Gamblers.

III had a rather remarkable ex-
perience when was chalpain in the
army" remarked one OF tile ministers
at pastors union. .#-r- f..
"What was it?" @.s..a... -. ..
ri had been working and talking to
the boys about gambling and they
finally turned all the cards in the
camp over to me. TheneNt day they
were paid off. The following day
was passing out and saw blanket
spread out, with two Jumps OF sugar
on one corner, and about half the
money in the camp spread out"
"What were they doing!!''
'"They We're betting on which lump
OF sugar any would first light, and all
themoney on the blanket changed
hands on the result"
"What did you say to the boys
II said Here boys, come get y@nr
cards" Detroit Free Press.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1891-06-25

But was read for the Captain and
felt Imogene's heart throb against
mine as my weapon expl odeM. / had
broken ms rlghtrarmland his.pistol fell
to the floor. Ere he could use his left
hand had himacovered, while / saw
Black Sam writhing on thefoor in the
death-throe, Whale Luce. ass calm as
ever, had both OF his pistols levelIed.
full on Captain Roberts: "One OF as is
enough, Luce. Twill keep himc covered
Whl i you bind his arms securely, Civ,
ing INN no unnecessary PAIN
And then turned to Imogene. Brave
girl! She had mot fainteda Roberts
had led her to this place by pack OF
lies, and when she discovered his vii
lanly ne bodily demanded that he have
her promise tomarry him when they
reached Washington, for, as T had
long suspected, he was a. SOW, and
was then on his way Northa.
cob! my darling" said to her.
ibid you mean it, when GU; called me
by my first name?"
She put herr hand into mime. She
looked for q moment in mX,eves. and
seemed intensely agitated.
"Remember," | said, "that you be
long to one people, to another. We
may not meet for years again
In a moment her arms Were around
my neck and she kissed meas il she
would newer cease. "Danling," she
whispered, :'take me back toRichmond.
Where youlgo l go, your gods are my
gods, andyour people my, people. I
could not live without you. This
night has>shown me that. -.
'"Then'u ought to thank that villain
yonder for one good turna You will
really share our. fortunes2.1s
Her only answer was o. kiss. .
Il Eel i 4 ,- u T. 4
| may mention,, en- PEASANT, that
"Oaptain" Roberts was tried and hung
next day.-Atlanta Constitution.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1891-06-25
He Waited in the Cellar.

In travelling over the battlefield OF
Antietam met an aged negro, who
seemed to know the lay OF the ground
perfectly well, and after time l
inquired,
"Were you here when the fight took
placer"
Fright yere, sah," he replied.
"Saw it all, then?'
"Well. sab, not 'zactly, but saw
de dead folks arter de battle
"Why didn't you witness the
movements Of the troops?"
well, sab, / was dun embarrassed
9 heap dat day. / knowed Gineral
Lee was dependin on menQt towhocp
for de Yankees, an dat Gineral
Mcclellan was dependin' onmenot to
whoop agin 'em, an an SO ] dun went
down cellar and sat on de head Of a
cider bari an let EN- fight it out de
best way dey could,
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1891-06-25
A CHAIN OF THOUGHTS.
Had cigarettes no asnes,
And roses ne er a thorn,
M WAN mould ho n fLo.

Had cigarettes no asnes,
And roses ne er thorn,
No man would be funker
OF whin, or burn, or bunker,
There were no need for mashes,
The turf would meier be torn,
Had cigarettes no ashes,
And roses ne'era thorn.
Had cigarettes no ashes,
And roses ne'er thorn, H..
The big trout would not ever
Escape into the river
No gut the salmon smashes
Would leave US all folorn,
Had cigarettes no ashes
And roses meier thorn.
But It's an unideal, ...........s.. s..
Sad world in which we're born,
And things will go contrary
With Martin and with Mary.
And every day the real
Comes bleakly in with morn,
And cigarettes have ashes ....
And every rose thorn.
-Longman's Magazine.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1891-06-25
SPECTRE OF BLACK SAM.

HIS is a legend OF the
Seven Pines.
1t is an authorita-
tive and truthful
statement of what oc-
CURED one night in '62
when Mcclellan was
sustaining one whole
week OF solid thrash
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1891-06-25
Limbe,..p on Ursnpiring.

svThey tell me, ParsDn, that you've
consented to umpire the ball game
between the Squash Hollow Babtists
and the Zion Brstherhood. Is that
so?"
Oats de gospel trnfe, sah!''
ut strikes me that's O rather preca,
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1891-06-25
An Authoritative Decision.

To mn1N game running ts,hi father
one day With a weight OF trouble, on
his minds. 'sSadie says THAT the 1moon
is made>ofi green cheese, pa, and I
don't hallewe it, 'Don|tyou believe
it? Why not?" ~ knew it ism t."
"But how do you k1lowiM.'' stIs it,
papaSs5'' ''Don't ask me that question;
you must find out fory yourself <tHow
can Itind it out?" ''Noyt, must study
into,it. s'Hew went to. the parlor, took
the faaaily Bible FROM the. table, and
was: naissed for some time. when he
came rsnning inta, the. study. II
have. found it out; the, moon is not
made OF green cheese, fos the moon
WAS made before tia CONS were"
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1891-06-25
Not the Propar Thing.

Mrs. Dukane-A New York man, i
who was Respondent over his DELAYED
marriage, has, shot his sweetheart.
Dukane-I don't see how that could
hurry matters, Chronic Telegraph,
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1891-06-25
A NeWCur&

Mrs. Cribber-aWhat has become of
all your Cleopatra; iewelry the asps.
SNAKES, serpentss. and things?"
Mrs Bibber>-.'Hueh! Don't let nv,
husband heara yoas> have hidden,
them away y ....r..
Haven't Nau worn them at ALPS
II wore them once, and the monsent
my husbaadi saw them he rushed off
to a doctor.. The next morniagr he,
took the pledge> I sha'n't weaR them
again unless he backslides. New
York Weekly.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1891-06-25
A Strong Reason.

She was having as confidential talk
with her aunt.
III can never MARRY Harry WEST
lock-" she said,, i'm q tone which,. inn
piled that it was~seless to tall about
it. II never CAM
fAnd why CAN'T you?" asked: her,
aunt. .l'm su#a-I should think any
girl would estess.l it an homer to, be-.
Harry WestlQak>s wife. He is very
wealthy, tooo, Why can t youe alwy
him?"
because lge.hasn't asked me. to, and
l know he 1asNsr will. ''-Bsston, Her.
aid.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1891-06-25
Accommodating.

lrate Guest (toaeeommodaing land
iordotan Oklahoma hotel 81 GU in
formed me that might order what
'evertI 4zked'ford dinner. called for OK
tail seRp,. salmon, chops, potato SAL
ad, a. bottle OF wine, and the like, and
The: waiter brought me cosn bread
and bacon. /"
Landlord acheerfully) Ugh, that's
outright an> regular, stranger! We like
to be. accommodating andsso we let
the newcomers order what.ahey please
aphat then give 'em jest the same as the
restlgit.. It's no trouble fee the wait
erto'take their orders, ana it makes
the strangers feel kinders good while
they're Waitin'." -Brooklyn Life.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1891-06-25
Am Unforeseen Emergency,

j: First Youth-:sI know where we can,
ARE a boat, Let's go sailing"
! Second Youth-"T 12aFer sailed a. )
boat, nor did you, I guess
First Youth-Nso; butTve bought a..
book which tells all about how to =,
sail boat. Come on I'll read the
instructions while you steer
; Both Youths haitian hour latanl.:
1000! WOO WOO! We're upset"
/. Second Youth [houndering around }
lin the water -"Whaswha-what shall
we do now?''
First Youth gasrihgg] -"LI don;t-
a>rl-Enow, I've lost The book."-Cood
News.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1891-06-25
Core citing the Maoistrate.

Magistrate ito complainaat our
dog was poisoned on the north side,
yosh say?"
Complainant-:'Why, your honor, /
think he was poisoned all over
Chicago Inter-O Ocean.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1891-06-25

ism it?T 80 Se'i1i''s'
'..N,ocHnlookep;yesr Mister Man! I
lalnI no1prles fighter. ter be sho,'
iieeuei ., hain,t nuuver .wukked in no
quarry an got''miN'k up, wild a bias.
OUT q gentermannerr my perfeshion
OATS rumpired. fo'teen, church 'Iec.
tlons, Wd,ar de- arrivals, dat bris,Tn
Wld razoGs dat thesve'y wuds dat Va,
done spnesserfy git chop up inter
silly bsss TO = dey get half ont 40
mout, lenme 'te1l.y ya,dat kline O. chan
haln,t: gWlne trenple boat rumnir;n,
over 'dese yere ebby day baseball
erfa' rs, !1deedrhe ,hainlt,. sahp'-Ros-
ton Courier.
RaptdTransit.
The following Dialogue. took place
between tweold colored folks on the
street.
"Atlantats got randi transit now,
sure,"
"Whatrdo,oyou, mean de dummy
kyars?'' -
mo, l'doesn't meansno dummy"
lou 1ans' betalkin' bout de lee ,
trio line, yden'' = .
mo, Lisn't, neithsr:'''
in';'bout?"2~ w. '~''A
"I1n talkin'''b out dat pytrol wag-
gin, cause it tablespoons furder in ten
minutes dan you'll git back from in siT
months I Il Atlanta JoEnnal.
/ nDesperation.
iPedlarar "f ann introducing a. new
kind Of hairbrush, which,
Business Man (impatiently) give
mousse iona hairbrush~ Can't Won see
I'm baldR,,.,
Pedlar:,': eyes, .asr:. Your LADY, per-
haps--o' ~
Business Mann: "she's bald, too, ex-
cept. when she goes QUIT
/; !Pedlar:'- eyes, sir. Child at home
prQbably -
Business MANI: "only month old.
Bald too.'''
!. .Pedlara- "Yas, sir. You keep pet
dog, >maybe-'' p
Business Mann awe do, but it's a.
hairless dog"
{ Pedlarr (desparately): Cant sell
you aoIas typapens, sir?'
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1891-06-18
AsTORIA's RAILROAD SCHEME.
Reaching After Northern Pacific Con
nection-The Salmon Pack

Reaching After Northern Pacific Con-
nection-The Salmon Pack.
Mr.. and Mrs P. J. Trenchard, of Astoria, are
at the Rainier, and are making Seattle their
headquarters for a tour of the Sound, where
they are visiting relatives. Mr.. Trenchard is
county clerk of Clatsop county, Or, aud presi-
dent of the Astoria Board of Trade. To a Posi-
INTELLGENcER reporter last evening he said:
sour efforts to secure railroad connection have
been renewed, and Captain George Flavell has
taken hold of the scheme for road from AS
toria to Goble, on the south bank of the Column
bia, opposite Kalama, where it would connect
with the Northern Pacific. A survey has
been made by party of Astorians
and estimates show that the road, which would
be fifty six miles long, can be built for $4,000
mile. A syndicate has been formed to build it
in conjunction with the Northern Pacific.
astoria is growing steadily, and, like Seattle
and Portland, has recently extended her city
limits. We now have n population OF about
5000. Although the salmon catch has been
small, think the packers will lose nothing by
1T, as they will get better prices than they OBJ
tanned during the last two years. While the
season began fifteen days later than usual, 1t is
likely to continue fifteen days later. SO that we
shall make up at the end what we lost at the be-
ginning
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1891-06-18
who have Lost anything are few commission

who have lost anything are q few commission
men at th Western terminus.
There is absolutely no foundation for the
charges of discrimination in the distribution Of
Cars, which were rife last year. No preference
was shown to the Northern Pacific Elevator
Company or any other party. No stockholder,
officer or employe of the railroad is interested
In the elevator company-the officers and EN-.
ployes would not be permitted to be interested
in 1t. Any such preference would be directly
contrary to my distinct orders, which are 70
serve all alike. If there had been any violation
OF this order, 1t would have been reported to me
and am confident that there has been no such
discrimination. Notwithstanding all the de-
nunciations aimed at the road and at me per-
sonaily, not single complaint ever reached me.
il any complaint had reached me IL would have
been investigated and If there had been any
ground for it it would have been capable OF easy
uroof"
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1891-06-18
BRyANT,s BLooDLEss BATTLE.
He yainly Tried to Stop the Great
Northern TrackIayers.

He vainIy Tried to Stop the Great
Northern TrackIayers.
Details of the trouble between the Great
Northern traeklsyers and Captain W. J. Bryant
at Richmond Beach, reached the city yesterday.
No blood was shed, no shots were fred, and the
captain and his forces retreated in open order
after a warm parleY. Tracklaying proceeded
with but slight interruption, and there was no
occasion to call on the courts for aid to restrain
the captain from blocking the way OF the invad-
ing enemy.
On reaching Richmond Beach on Monday the
tracklaylng gang heard that plain Bryant had
built fence across the grade at the boundary
of his land and proposed to defend it against
the railrosd men. They telegraphed TO Andrew
Woods, one of the roads attorneys, who was at
Snohomish and he prepared papers in injunc-
ton proceedings. On Tuesday morning when
they reached the fence they found Captain Bry-
ant and FIVE men on the ground. The gallant
captain shouted TO them:
'Any man who goes through that fence does
IL at his peril"
The foreman of the gang went through the
fence. despite his threats, and the captain
struck at him with cane, at the same time
putting his hand to his hip pocket as il TO draw
a revolver The conductor of the train, whose
name is Reed, had stepped close to the captain,
10 catch his arm in case he tried TO shoot, and,
when the cane was raised to strike, caught his
arm anu SAID.
SHOVE out OF the way here
''What have you to do with it1" inquired the
astonished captain
"Never mind about that; move out of the way
or I'll put the handouts you." answered
Reed with an air of authority. as he pulled
pair of handouts from his pocket.
The captain was convinced that Reed was an
officer, and moved to one side with an angry
protest AS he did so, he shouted to his men:
Attend to your business. men!"
The party thereupon withdrew a short dis
lance up the grade and felled tree clear across
1t. Then they also withdrew. Tracklaying pro-
ceeded with only a half hours interruption
while the tree was being hauled to one side, and
as no further resistance was offered, the irnme-
date need OF an injunction passed away.
Track reached Edmonds last evening and will
be at Mulkilteo, twelve miles further, by June
%. Rails cannot be laid from Boulevard to the
city until the Lake shore withdrsws the loco
motive and cars from the track where the Great
Northern grade crosses. 1t is understood that
this obstruction is intended to force a crossing
agreement There are also rightof-way suits
with the Oregon Improvement Company on the
water front to settle before track can be laid
southwark to the city
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1891-06-18
THE PULPIT DECLARED VACANT.
Pastoral Relations of the Second Pres
byterian Church Are Dissolved.

Pastoral Relations of the Second Pres
byterian Church Are Dissolved.
A meeting of the Puget Sound Presbytery
was held last night at the Second Presbyterian
church, corner of Oak and Harrison streets, to
determine what action should be taken with
reference TO the passionate of that church. There
were present Rev. George F. Whitworth, d. D.,
Rev. 7. NJ. Boyd and Rev. J. NJ. Hughes, OF this
city; Rev. Calvin W. Stewart. d. D., president of
whitworth college, at Sumner; Rev. C. Head,
of Fremont; Rev. D. NJ Davenport, OF Sumner;
Rev. Wilmer McNair, professor in Whitworth
college, Revs. w. II. Cornatt of North Yakima:
McElmond, of Whatcom, and Brown, of snoho-
mish, and Rev. Benjamin Parsons, former pas
tor of the church.
II was decided to dissolve the old pastoral re-
lations and give the session of the church per-
mission to supply the pulpit until the next
meeting of the presbytery. which will be in oc-
tober. Rev. A. T. Fox, of Whitworth college,
will supply the pulpit next Sunday and formally
declare the pastorate vacant.
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1891-06-18
Colonel CIough at whatcom.

WHArCoM, June IL. - Especial. i Colonel
Clough, OF the Great Northern, is here today,
consulting with Cornwall, Hayward and Bell,
OF the Bellingham Bay a. British Columbia rail.
road relative to railroad matters. The relations
between these railroads are amicable, and the
Great Northern is likely to make traffic arrange
ments with the Cornwall road. The Great
Northern has not yet accepted the New West
minister Southern, and speculation is rife 1t is
said, that the Canadian Pacific business will
all be done over the Bellingham Bay & British
Columbia road for the present
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1891-06-18

The staff of the Chicago Graphic, which is
writing up and illustrating the state, went
across the bay to the grain elevator yesterday,
and also visited Ballard. This morning they
will make trip to Sidney, and this afternoon a
special committee OF the Chamber of Commerce
consisting of Mr.. J. B. MetcaIfe, Senator ". r.
Forrest Mr.. Alfred Holman, Mr.. A. NJ Brookes
and Mayor Harry White, will show them Seattle.
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1891-06-18
Didn't Like the Epithet.

Jushua Audette was fined SIS yesterday by q
jury in Justice Neagle's court for assaulting his
neighbor, w. E. Lockard. The assault is alleged
to have occurred On June s, and was the result
of a dispute over an abstract for lot which Au-
dette bought from Lockard. In the dispute
Lockard called Audette "stinker," and the lat
ter resented the appellation with his fists. The
parties live adjoining each other in East Park
addition. Audette paid his fine with very bad
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1891-06-18
THE BURLINGTON COMES WEST.
An Extension to Helena and Butte
Under Construction.

Under Construction.
Notwithstanding the frequent denials that
the Burlington railroad will be extended to the
Coast, it is being rapidly extended in this direc
ton. The last official map OF the road showed
that the most western point reached by it was
Buffalo, in Northern Wyoming. Since
that map was published the road has
been constructed across the state line
into Montana, and contracts have been
let for an extension to Helena and Butte. The
road will cross the Northern Pacific at Billings
and run through Castle, where it will tap some
coal mines, which are one of the objective points
of It.
At Helena the road will meet the Great North
ern, and as the latter road uses the Burlington
as an eastern connection to enter Chicago, it is
presumed that the Burlington will use the Great
Northern as western connection to reach the
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1891-06-18
Union Pacific Mt A.. standst;u.

V. G. Bogue, chief engineer in charge of the
Portland & Puget Sound railroad, and Colonel
W. II. Effinger, of Tacoma, attorney for the
Union Pacific railroad, are at the Rainier. Mr.
Bogue said 10 a Posr-ISRELLIGEScER reporter
last evening: al do not know when work will
be resumed on the road. We have settled with
all the contractors and have not let any new con-
tracts. canno. predict anything in regard to
an arrangement for construction OF the road
Jointly with the Great Northern"
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1891-06-18
LAKE UNION VICTIMS BURIED.
An Immense Funeral Procession Fol
lows Them to Their Graves.


lows Them to Their Graves.
Between 500 and 600 people attended the fune-
raj yesterday afternoon of the two victims of
Sundays drowning accident in Lake Union.
The services were held at Cross 4 Co. at p.
m, and the sidewalks were blocked with people
on both sides of the streets. stream of people
poured in to look at the remains of the unfortu-
nate John Danieson and Miss Ida Sandberg.
The services were conducted at the parlors by
Rev. Erik Hadaen, of the Swedish Evangelical
church. and Rev. Alfred L. Scott. Mr. Hadaen
paid glowing tribute to the good qualities of
the dead.
The funeral procession was headed by the
First Regiment band and the Swedish lodge of
Good Templars, Monitor Lodge, No. s4 Good
templars from the other Seattle lodges followed.
Twelve pallbearers marched beside the two
hearses. At Temperance street the band opened
ranks and allowed the procession to march
through, and the band returned down town.
The procession formed into two long lines at
Mount Pleasant cemetery, and the caskets were
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1891-06-18
Insurance Surveyor for Seattle.

The Pacific Insurance Union is arranging to
strengthen the force at its Portland Office in
order that it may have a surveyor at Seattle one
week in every month. This arrangement will
hold good for six months at least or until the
Sound business has so far settled down thatit
will be no longer necessary.
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1891-06-18
Want the Fireboat Crew Drilled.

Members of the board of fire underwriters ex-
press the opinion that the crew of the freboat
should have q weekly drill In order to secure
quickness in getting to work at fire. Former
tests have only been made with a view to show
ing their ability to throw water but great deal
depends, they say, on quickness in getting to
fire. connecting with plug and laying hose.
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1891-06-18
New Train Between Seattle and Centraiia

CESrRALIA, June 17,-[Speeial. THE Posi-
INTELLIGEScER correspondents learned today
from source deemed reliable that the Northern
Pacific contemplates putting on a local accom-
mediation train between Centralia and Seattle
via Olympia. This will be very popular train,
ana will most certainly do a large business.
This will enable us 70 reach Olympia. Tacoma
and Seattle and return the same day, giving
time to transact business