Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1891-04-18

Up went the hawk to circle in the air,
hungry as ever, but none the worse for
his great scare.
In the barn there was an old gray jack
ass who had been noted as a kicker in
his younger days, and had never out
grown the propensity entirely. Now
| Mrs. Joshua Phlatkins had neglected to
| give Jack his measure of corn and oats
that morning. Jack had keen ON his
good behavior for several days, and was
nearly ripe for good old fashioned kick,
1 but had refrained from indulgence for
| lack of sufficient cause. When the hours
went slowly by and no corn appeared,
Jacks ears moved forward viciously but
still he refrained from rash actions, as a
good old mule should. When, however,
that "bangi" came, Jacks youthful
| vigor began to return.
"Slashl Crash!"-with every successive
kick board few from the barn into
space stats, boards, studding, everything
went down before his righteous fury
Not until everything within his reach
was kicked out of reach, did Jack stop to
rest, and condescend to eat the corn which
his master forwarded
A litter of young pigs that had been
shut in the barn went squeaking through
the newly made door, and Joshua spent
up out of reach of an old gentleman hog
who was jealous of them, and deemed it
his duty to devour them.
Thus it was that when Joshua returned
to the house he found the fire waning;
after renewing it he recommended his
| churning.
Wonderful never heerd Marier say
that butter would churn itself muttered
sir. Phlatkins, peering into the churn,
where the cream was in state of strange,
weird agitation. Reaching in with his
hand to see what might be the cause of
the odd phenomenon, his flesh came in
contact with a splinter After fishing
few moments he drew forth the strangest
looking specimen of butter ever churned.
This roll of butter said in a queer, CUR
Cling voice, Me-youw!" It was Mr.. t.
Cat in disguise so complete that his own
mother could never have recognized him.
Poor old T. Gait He loved cream, but
this time he had even more than he would.
Josh placed him outside the kitchen
window, when he began a process of
cleaning which to this day he has never
ended.
Josh was wiping up the cream as well
as he could, when Dan came in.
@Goshl Pop, what kind of animal is
| that out in the yard?n
"Dan'l, said Mr.. Phlatkins severely,
aDan'l keep your mouth shet; an if you
say word about this I'll tan you within
an inch of your lifel"
/ Upon trying the bread, which was
beautifully brown outside, but heart
brokenly sad within, Mr.. Phlatkins said: (:
@Dan'l, dinners goin' to be late to-day,
an you had better go over to Aunt
Sally's for something to eat, or you'll be
tardy to school
@All right, pop, said Daniel, march
ing off obediently.
Owing to dearth of eatables, Mr..
Phlatkins dined on cob pipe and medi-
tations
After dinner he put the bread, butter,
and other uneatables in large pan and
took them out into the back yard. This
done, he sat down, rot to rest, as usual,
but to commence work upon a sock,
which he succeeded in darning good
deal by 4 o'clock.
For supper he toasted a little dry
bread and made a cup of tea by the
time his wife drove up to the barn and
/ had attended TO the horses.
After supper Mrs. Phlatkins said:
Well, Josh, after you git the dishes
done you kin 60 an milk the cows. I've
! got few papers and things / want to
look over this evening"
When Joshua had returned from do
| ing this she remarked:
Josh, / don't see the bread nowheres.
| Wasn't it good for nothin' 2"
Never see nicer bread In your born
days, he affirmed boldly.
That's queer" muttered Mrs. Josh.
3No one ever could bake decent bread
without turnin' that damper to heat the
oven. Then she added in louder tone,
4And the butter, Josh: where is that9n
@That was awful fine, too, replied ne,
| from behind his newspaper.
Just then the cat rose from where he
had been lying by the kitchen stove. and
Mrs. Phlatkins' quick eye caught sight of
the grease spot with which he had decor
ated the floor.
-Graciousl Josh, what on earth is the
matter with Tom? Just look a-hereir
Pop, he began Dan, who sat in the
corner making little Satans on his slate.
aDanl, interrupted Mr.. Phlatkins
harshly, @Dan'l, have you carried in
enough wood?"
Guess so, pop.
Well, go and carry in some more; it's
| going to be colder tomorrow.
Joshua, said Mrs PhIatkins, when
Dan had dragged himself out to the wood
shed, what have you done with the
bread an the butter5"
Fact is, said the truthful house
keeper, -some poor people come along in
covered wagon gypsies, guess an
gave all the things, an the squash an
taters / had cooked, to them for their
dinner. Awful big family they had.
aWeIl, Joshua, if they ate the bread
| that you cooked in that cold oven, they
must be dead by this time, sure But
what did you give them all that butter
| for?n
@Oh, they seemed so fond of good
butter, could not disapint 'em. T"
Just then Tom followed Dan in with
his load of wood. Poor, sticky Toni
| He walked as if his once sleek fur had
| been converted into a water proof. skin