Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1891-02-19
MISCELLANEOUS.

how long will you have to study before
you can wear glasses?"
An uptown druggist in this city has
In his window a card bearing these
words: "Your headache cured while
you wait"
Mabel (confidentially)-"I WAS aw,
fully stuck. on yon once, Jack" Jack
(gratifed)-"Whenw was that?" Mabel
s'Before l knew you. Epoch.
81 tell you l won't put another
blamed cent into the business" he said.
''Don't talk so loud, Mr.. Bullion" urged
the other, ''the clerks downstairs will
hear you" ''What of it? It's no secret"
roared Mr.. Bullion. ''They know I'm
the silent partner. "-Chicago Tribune.
A woman called at the department
of charities on Saturday bearing letter
from charitable Sewickley lady, which
stated that of the three varieties of poor
persons--namely," Goods poor, the devils
poor, and poor critters"-the bearer was
of the third named species and deserved
special aid. She was sent to the County
Home.-Pittsburgh Commercial.
"A French doctor has secured a
patent on process for electro-plating
people after they die, and making their
bodies as indestructible as copper or
brass. If this is true, we can't see why
no-account husbands and good-for-noth-
ing sons-in-law may not be used for
bookcases aud hat racks, after they
stop spelling pure air by breathing it.
RAMS Horn.
One Form Of It.-"You call RoXley
a conccited man? He's always running
himself down. I've heard him say he
had no memory, no imagination, no
faculty of doing things like other peo-
pie, and he hated to look at his own in
significant image in the glass" 'Ies,
that's his way of saying that if he'd had
the making Of himself he could have
done much better job than the Lord
did. Chicago Tribune.
| -Stammerers, when whispering,
rarely show any impeachment in speech.
| On this fact a new method of treatment
has been advocated, which is as follows
In the first ten days speaking is pro-
hibited: this will allow rest to the voice,
and constitutes the preliminary plan
of treatment During the next ten
days speaking is permissible in the whis-
pering voice; and in the course of the
next fifteen days the ordinary converse
tional tone may be gradually employed.
in 1909, during the second invasion
of Spain by the French, some valuable
crown hocks of sheep were sold to raise
money. The (then) American Consul at
Lisbon, Portugal, Mr.. Jarvis, pur-
chased !, 400 head and sent them to this
country. A portion of the pure and I'M
mixed Mcrino blood of these flocl1s is
still to be found in some few parts of
America. Such was really the origin
sheep now to be found in the Unitct
States.
The meanest man in California
crawled into his hole with disgust whe
he heard of the mcanness OF the fellow
who became plaintiff in a remarkable
lawsuit. A man from Bare Butte Val
ley lost his pocllet-bool1 containing $3.50,
which was found by a man of Elk Creek.
A month later, upon learning who was
the owner, he returned the same, and
the owner was very thankful sued
for interest for the use of the money for
that time. Judgment was given for
SLID and costs.
An absent-minded Maine man, along
in the fall, when he saw his ncighbors
digging their potatoes, took his horse.
put some baskets into the cart and
with his boy, drove the team across the
pasture to back field. Opening the
bars, the boy drove the cart into the
field. when the farmer stepped out few
rods from the fence. looked about him
gazed across the field up and down. and
seeing no signs of potatoes. said to
himself: "Wcll, | declare, | thought !
had some potutocs here. but | guess /
forgot to plant EN-
To growl is one of the joys of life,
according to Il commutcr on one of the
railways running into this city He is
even willing to pay for it, apparently,
for, at the beginning Of the year, an
official on the road having offered him
al annual pass he declined to accept it.
mo, Thanks said he. returning the
card. Il am much obliged, but ] prefer
to pay my fare and retain my privilege
of expressing my Indignation at tho way
this road is managed. | wouldn't sell
my right to revile you and your blanked
old system for all the passes in cre1.
ton. N. y. Sun.
, The pleasure of bathing in Pull
man car is thus drolly pictured by a
gentleman who has doubtless expert
enccd what he describes: The coach
swings and jolts along, and you feel
your way unsteadily to the tiny bath.
room. The portr fills the tub which is
narrow and deep and more like barrel
tn n the vessels we use in our houses
Ten to one, as you sit beside the ap
paratus to undress: the car will strike a
sharp curve, and all the water in the
tub will leap out and deluge you from
: head to foot. If you escape that luck
and get into the tub, the curve and the
car are certain to meet, and in an in
! slant you find yourself in an e1St,ty re
ceptacle. while your shoes and stockings
are floating around in the lake that ha:
! covered the floor.
J The Two Japans.