Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1891-06-20
TIRE ARIZONA KICKER.

Western Journalism Has Its Annoyances.
From the New York World
WE DID 1T.-Bill Burbanks, the mule
whacker on the other side of the creek, is try
ing to make great mystery Of the fact that he
got a dose of bird shot in this town the other
evening. He says that some one certainly at
tempted to assassinate him az he was riding
along Cheyenne street at midnight, and he
thinks of offering reward of 900 for the ar
rest of the wretch
William is simply playing the public, but he
can't play us. We had Just stretched out on
our cot Thursday night, and the hour was
about IL. when Bill came along on his old
dromedary. We heard him cussing while he
was yet long ways off. When he reached the
Office he dismounted and hunted up a club, and
was about to smash in a window when we pep
pered him with handful of fine shot kept on
hand for such emergencies. We hardly believed
any of them would get through the buckskin
and dirt but 1t seems they did. and he had to
have a doctor pick them out The best thing Bill
can do is to keep shet. He attempted a smart
trick and got left. and there isn't q man this
side of Tombstone who would have cared il all
the shot had gone clean through him and his
dromedary. too.
GAIL HIM OFF.-H the so-called Mai. Skin
ner, who has ioafed around this town for the
last six months, has any friends who have his
welfare at heart they will call him of the perch
It seems the major has been LAYING bis pipes
for Office and that our article of two weeks ago.
asking him where he stole his last COW, has
somewhat clouded his prospects,. He now
threatens to shoot us ON sight and was seen at
the post office yesterday with big revolver
belonging to Luke Higgins.
We regret these little annoyances, but II they
must be met we are not the man TO shrink
from the task. Tomorrow afternoon. after our
first form goes to press and we work of 200
auction bills, we shall strap on our gun and
take walk. II Major Skinner has departed
for Tucson he may live to be hundred years
old; if he hasn't he will make No 10 in our
private graveyard. This is official and comes
right from headquarters.
NEw BooM.-We understand that several real
estate firms in this town have combined to get
up a boom and make things jump. In fact.
they offered us a half-page ad. for this week
but we didn't take ii. As an individual we
might cheat a man from Omaha at poker. but
as an editor we can't be hired TO help swindle
our subscribers. In order to offset the machine
tions of this syndicate we wish to say:
We have got the fag-end of one railroad here
and neither want nor will ever be able to get
anything more.
Society is not cultivated. Such q thing as a
toothbrush or a volume of poems found on
man here would hang him.
The land around the town is so poor that II
takes nine feet of it over u dead mule to hold
the carcass down.
1t is not trade center. We have the Dig
ger Indian on three sides of us and large
family of coyotes on the fourth.
The climate wobbles all over creation. max
ing the demand for bufialo-skin overcoats and
linen busters about equal and mighty steady.
1t is not a sanitarium for invalids II The
climate didn't kill EN- our doctors would
This is about all, but enough to put our SUBJ
scribers on their guard and to clear our con-
A No.
temen OF the combination, go ahead with your
boomlet