The Wichita daily eagle., 1891-11-03
sUNFLowER sILHoUErrEs.
Eugene Wares epitaph on ingalls,
vanitys

OF his stuckEitude
He fell"
The gall that ingalls, has and the gall OF
J. r. Burton has are different.
Next month Senator Peffer will begin to
do rattling business in ingalls, chair
John ]. Ingalls, wears the same kind Of
red neckties now that he did in the senate
Jake Stotler of wellington gives 1t out
that he is selling thirteen postage stamps
for cent and quarter.
A great many siiver-tongued orators in
Kansas have forgotten that tarnish IS re-
suit of too much exposure.
Governor Humphrey. it is said. will To-
cate permanently at Kansas City, Kan,
after the expiration of his term OF Office.
OF course the Alliance and the Democrat
ic parties are different, but you can't tell
the difference in their fight on the hepuoli-
can party.
1t is time to ring the chestnut bell on
the man who is Just as good hepho-
lican as you are" but who talks Alliance
and votes the Alliance ticket.
The old-fashioned, two-sided election is
the most humane. There will be twice as
many men disappointed tomorrow morn
ing as there would have been with two
parties in the field.
"Ah.n said the blind man who had been
taken TO a public meeting. what beau
tiful bass voice. Who IS hep
"Hushr' whispered his companion, ITS
Mrs Lease"
Old Ben Clover and Gingerbread Baker
will undergo a palpAble disappointment
when they discover that the speaker OF
the house of representatives at Washlhs-
ton will not address them as brother"
The whole truth of the matter is that
Kansas has three parties because two par
ties could not accumulate ali the men
who wanted to run for office AS the con-
tagion of politics spreads, it may DE neces-
sary TO have a fourth and fifth party
Billy Buchan made his appearance, for
the first time in long while, at pan
ouet in Kansas City, Saturday night'
where he responded to the toast, 'Leglsla-
ton" As for last wiuter's work IN that
line, Mr. Buchan probably feels better ht-
ted for a roast than toast.
At the benefit given aC the Columbia
theater in Chicago, for Leonard Wash
burne's family, last Thursday, s4,OOO was
taken in. James Whitcomb Riley wrote
poem for the occasion, Carmencita
danced, Manola sang "Digby Bell" and
other celebrities took part.
Jerry Simpson is smart. There IS
move among the members OF the next con-
press to set down on him. They imagine
that he is going to be fresh and they III
tend to take it out of him. But he VIII be
wary and surprise the country by keeping
his mouth shut.
Landlord" yelled the guest down the
dark stairway of the hotel, Il can't stand
that dog bowling. Kill him"
eyes SIR" answered the clerk.
sand when you get him killed, give me
a room where L can't hear the wind how
so plain. / am Republican"
as that sO?"
'You bet your boots; straight-out
rock-bottomed square-toed Republican
and 1 can't stand any kind of bowling"
Arthur Capper in New York. 1t hardly
seems possible that you can SEND mes
sage from New York TO London and receive
a reply in less time than you can get al
order to your down town grocer, but IL IL
done every day in the week. stood Oh
the floor of the New York stock exchange
few days ago and saw member of the
firm of Henry Clews 81 Co, the vel
known bankers, send cablegram to theil
agent on the floor of the London stock ex
change and get an answer in six minutes
could hardly believe 1t. Twenty min
utes later the broker started another mes
sage aud asked me to time it by the ex
change clock. In five minutes and "A verl
few seconds the reply came. Then he toiC
me that to send cablegram to Londor
and have a reply In five minutes was NJ
unusual thing, in fact it had often beer
| done in less than four minutes.