Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1891-11-26
"BAB" TALKS OE BONNETs AND BRIDES
Impressions Created by Weddings
This Autumn.

Story of Pretty Bonnet--Not n Marrying
Giri--Young Wives in Boarding Houses
The Right Kind of Wife.
| Special Correspondence Of Gazette and journal
| New YoRK, Nov. 20.-The getting and
giving in marriage colt es on the in
crease, but the more weddings you go to
the more forcibly are you convinced
that the average bride in New York
Is neither young nor beautiful, and that
she is perfectly capable of looking after
the gentleman by her side, who is counted
OF so little worth that he is not even
spoken of as best man at his own we'd
ding. Youth and beauty used to be sup
| posed to go with white satin and orange
blossoms, but so-called swagger air, and
q rather blase look oftenest accompanies
them nowadays.
NOT A MARRYING GIRL.
The New York girl is not over-anxious
TO get married; she has too good time
| while she is single, and she doesn't pro-
pose to attach herself to one man too early
In lie; or even to be counted among the
| young matrons before she is about 2S. This Is
pure, absolute, feminine selfishness. She
doesn't want to marry for love; she wants
position, and the man with refined tastes
whose income is small will find 1t difficult
70 get bride from among the so-called
fashionable girls. He thinks he would
| like dear little wife to welcome him home,
and to listen to him If he wants to talk
about his affairs; or to tell him of her
Gay; and after while, IT'S. just possible
that he thinks that she will carry in her
arms little bundle that will be Toms
baby and mine," for that's what she will
call it. He sees this vision going away In
the smoke of his pipe, and he gets up,
shakes himself together, and goes
TO DRESS FOR THE OPERA,
where he will talk to bright women, good
looking women, brilliant women. But
they are not women who would be willing
to sacrifice one French gown, one new
bonnet, or one single pleasure for an
honest mans love. You think am ex-
aggerating? i am not
You have only to read the descriptions
of fashionable weddings to find out who
marries the man who has just slender in
come of money and a magnificent outcome
of love. These girls leave it until too late
10 marry. They have their. own tastes
settled. and they seldom yield to man.
Ills influence over them Is generally slight,
and, at the best the marriages are apt TO
be merely comfortable, not Just happy
ones. That isn't right.
MARRIAGE AMONG THE JEWS.
There is one thing that like about the
Jews-that is their devotion to their wives.
No men in the world are as considerable of
women for whom they care and no men
give and create so much love in the heart
OF their wives as do these men. was talk.
ing to Jewess about happy marriages,
and put to her the question: "Are you
happy. in your marriage?" And she an
swered: II am so happy that the days are
not long enough for me to be glad in"
Now, this was not young girl, who had
been married two weeks year, or five
years; but q woman who had grown-up
sons, and who still loved the husband Of
her youth with greater ardor than she
dld IN the first year of her marriage.
don't know whose fault il Is, but should
like to know how many Gentiles could say
that. i know there are plenty of men
who do wrong, but also know that there
are a great many women who nag and
worry them into it. know there arc
great many men who haven't large in
comes whose wives insist on living in
boarding houses, and l think the place for
married people is home, even II II con-
slsts OF q room, of two chairs, bed and
table.
YOUNG WIVES IN BOARDING HOUSES.
Dolly is dear girl, but leave her alone
all day in boarding house, and she will
get into some sort of mischief, even IL il is
only IN being lazy. She is u sociable orea-
ture, and after she bids you goodbye she
runs into the parlor and talks to the other
women, and after awhile she goes out with
them to walk, to the matinee, and they all
go to the same dressmaker. Now, these
women may be just as good as your Dolly,
but | don't believe it is good thing for
women, five or six of them, to be too much
together.
THEY GROW TOO CONFIDENTIAL;
they discuss things that they have no bust
ness to know about and some evening
when you come home you will find your
room dark and no sign of Dolly to meet
you. She II rush in about Is minutes later
and say that she and Mrs. Chatterbox
stayed out longer than they intended. You
are not u brute and you don't like to be
dsagreeable to her about this; but that is
the time when little Lancashire treat
ment would be good for her. The treat
ment is severe but ellicacions.
THE THEN AND THE NOW.
However, you don't give 1t to her. and
after awhile you get used to coming home
to dark room, fumbling around for the
matches, or getting one from a sympathetic
chambermaid; and as you come uptown
you drift into the club getting home just
ut dinner time, and you give sigh be- |
cause, ten to one, Dolly wants to go to the |
theatre. There was time when going to |
the theatre was great frolio. Saturday
nights you and Dolly went and you had Il |
bit of supper afterwards, and the other |
nights in the week you two used to sit and |
talk, or you would read and Dolly would |
work away at Christmas gifts for some |
body, and she would drop the Christmas |
gift once in while, and interrupt the |
reading by patting your hand, or telling |
you for the millionth time what good |
looking fellow you were. Now she don't |
seem to care.
HOW TO LIVE NATURAL LIFE
II you are the average man you will find |
some woman who does. and, if Won are |
not, yon will plod along in your usual |
way until some day you will be taken |
with the pneumonia, something that will |
Kill you quick, and after you are gone and |
are cold and still and can't hear her, poor
Dolly will cry and moan because of what
she has left undone. Poor, weak Dolly.
1t would all have been different if Won had
gone into little home of your own, borne
children to keep you and your husband
young, and lived natural, loving life. |
never go to the funeral of a man and see
the widow weeping that / don't wonder
how much OF IL is remorse rather than
grief. We women leave so much undone
the little kiss, the tender pressure of the
hand, the gentle touch, all mean much to
q man, and give him courage to express
the affection that he has felt half ashamed.
half afraid to show to you.
THE RIGHT KIND OF WIFE.
Marriage Yes, | believe in marriage.
believe in marrying girl of Is to a man
oil ~ Delleve in marrying girl of 70 |
to man of 30; l believe in a girl going
from her mother to her husband, knowing
from her mother how good she must be
and only learning after she is wife of the
ways of the world and of the many things
it is wise for, her to avoid. The suffrage
people and the temperance people do not
agree with me, but I'll back my TYNE of
girl to be a good wife and good mother
against all the knowing ones that are the
result of isms and fads.
BoNNErs without AN rrn