Bismarck weekly tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1884-1943, 1891-06-12

Scathing Words About the Appearance Of
he Average Business Man.

scathing Words About the Appearance Of
the Average Business Man.
The American, and l allude only to the
male, is lamentably untidy-I hesitate to
say urclean, but I do not hesitate to assert
and to assert it vehemently, that the first
clause is true of our men of all classes,
stations, vacations and degrees of wealth..
Its evidences parade themselves in our
palaces, where a lack of means cannot ex-
culpate. In fact, cleanliness, neatness and
money have nothing whatever to do with
each other.
Animals can teach men important les
Sons in self respect. An American lady re-
siding in London a part of each year, when
asked suddenly what especial superiority
she found in the British over her own peo-
pie, replied n~aively, ooh, their men are so
clean!" The thrust was as unconscious as
it was unstudied. 1t were we'll for our men
to accept it as such.
Take one of our morning trains and fer
ries carrying an average American crowd
to the city of a morning. Here we have q
fairly representative variety of types and
of classes, and a sorry enough spectacle it
is which presents itself to our view even at
this early hour. Spotted clothes, I'M
brushed shoulders, frowsy hair and frayed
shirt cuffs are not uncommon. When this
herd returns at S o'clock, after the struggle
of the day, we will draw the veil.
II l meet a man in the late afternoon
with uncertain finger nails, depressed col
lar and soiled cravat, and he laboriously
explains to me that he takes his cold water
bath every morning at 6 and a sea din
upon his return to his country home be-
fore his late dinner, 1 refuse to be i'm.
pressed. His assurances carry no convic-
ton, even though l do not for an instant
doubt their veracity. l do not care to be
informed that he was clean early and will
be clean again anon. His present aspect is
none the less revolving. desire him to be
clean now, while l I'm in the way with him,
and not poison my day with his present
forlorn performance.
The average American. He shuffles with
his feet. His head is sunk and held low
between his shoulders. His arms are car
ried like the grocer boys, busy in his con-
scientious delivery of the brown paper
parcel. If lie BOWS to you, he will either
give you a grin and an imperceptible nod,
or shove his h%eadgear back and forth on
his head without dignity. Nothing less
impressive and distinguished can be i'm
aglned than an Americans salute.
There has been a good deal of righteous
wrath covering the i'll concealed pin pricka
OF a foolish jealousy in the TRADES of our
countrymen against the American woman's
prediction for foreign lovers and hus-
bands Pray remember, my Indignant
gentlemen, that feminine creatures are al
ways allured by eXternals. The male bird
found it out long ago, if you did not. Nor
have / always discovered it a certain as.
surance of mental brilliancy and moral
rectitude that the poor body should bs
neglected.. This, however, is the prevalent
opinion, and it seems hard to persuade u
countrymeu that it is an error.
1t may be said that our women, on the
whole, are extremely clean in their Der
SONS, their clothes and their houses. They
are even dainty. Probably no establish
ments are more scrupulously well kept,
and this under that peculiar restriction as
to Il proper number of dom"stics which re-
mains Il tradition even III our upper classes,
and which SO greatly increases the Difficult
ties OF housekeeping. This is Il depression.
II the American woman be Il martinez in
the ordering Of her home and SO careful in
matter OF her costume, is it not a lack of
respect for her fastidiousneSs that her hus-
band, father and brother Should. as thev
must do, so constantly shock her delicacyf
There is Il much abused creature going
about IN our streets and drawing rooms.
hooted, ]erred at, made the laughing stock
OF the club and the ScapegOat of the the
alter, a harmless, mild creature enough as
to retaliation-possibly because he is so
perfectly self satisiied-the dude. Now the
dude has done for us a great deal more than
we deserve, for all the abuse that is heaued
on his good humOred dcfensclcsSnrss. The
dude has he ped TO institute out of door
life among us, which is excellent, and over
and beyond this the dude keeps himself
clean. All honor therefore to the dude.
say L.-Julien Gordon in COSMOPOLITAN.