St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1891-12-08

Let US hear no more from the calamity
shrieKers who believe in the nonsensical
idea of tariff reform.
-
wild man has appeared at Carson, I'll
During lucid intervals, however, he stoutly
maintains that the collar button must be in
the same room where he dropped it.
Pugnacity-See here. dropped in to see if
you were prepared to eat your own words.
Sagacity-Excuse me, but am dieting
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Home rule appears to have gone to s leep
in the same grave with Parnell.
~
Annie Besaut, the Iheosophist, predicts that
intellect will become visible in time. Annie
is evidently right in line with those who ex
pect Democratic success in 1892
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The New York Recorder ssys: Democrats
pray for hard times as their only chance for
the presidency" There may, possibly, be a
few lonesome Democrats idiotic enough to
do this. just as there are thousands of idiotic
Republicans who claim that good crops are
owing to temporary Republican ascendency.
~
Postmaster General Wanna maker COMPLAINS
that the postal service is not quick enough.
Mr.. Wanamaker believes in quick sales and
small profits.
The enunciation OF the German emperor is
much clearer when he is not talking through
his hat.
As an Independent newspaper the Pitts
burg Dispatch simply needs push to land it
nf
would not take very hard push, either.
~
Kansas man wants two feet of the rope
with which a murderer was hanged, to cure
fits with. Two feet would hardly be long
enough. What's the matter with ten feet
exclusive of the moose?
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Judging from the alleged picture Of Russell
Sage published in the New York papers. the
explosion of that dynamite bomb carried
away mis- whiskers.
1t is high time that some energetic sheriff
held up a train robber-with q rope.
-
So New York is our only co mpetitor in the
convention race. That settles it. The ext
president of the United States will be nomi-
mated at ST. Paul
-
A great many Republican exchanges are
heading articles. Blaine Well Man"
Drive well or gas well?
Cautionary advice: Look ont for low bar
ometic pressure on the Christmas pocket
book.
A sporting item. waited UP from Omaha,
informs us that ''ldlejag will pitch for the
Brewers next season." Idlejag could hardly
have made a better selection of an appropri-
ate club had he been inspired by old Gam
brinus himself.
Quite a number of Republican ''spellbind-
ers" have already signed articles to bloviate
for high tariff next summer aud - de-
manded advance money.
-
Ella Wheeler Wilcox is sill buslly contrib
uting poetical definitions of love- As a lit
erary specialist Mrs Wilcox will ever COM
mand an enthusiastic clientele among the
young. ass
1t is rumored that 100000 Chinese rebels
are preparing to march on Pekin. What
Asiatic Jay Gould is putting up for these
And now those generous, whole souled,
open-handed New Workers have started
subscription to purchase silver service for
the new cruiser named in honor of their city.
However, the new vessel would better not
delay her first voyage Oh that account
The worlds fair managers might provide
special annex for English nobility, kind of
chamber of horrors, as it were. One prom
inent niche could be reserved for the Russells
He-Do you sing, Miss Violet?
She-No; 1 always prefer to make it pleas
ant for those visiting us.
Simply because men gamble on horse races
out at Garfield Park. the Chicago Inter Ocean
has decided to print no more sporting news
from that locality. Is the fact that gambling
is carried on at race tracks a new discovery
of the |. O.'s?
Anent the attack on Russell Sage. Sidney
Dillon, president OF the Union Pacific ralI-
way, says: Il never carry more than 50 cents
with me at time, SO do not fear being classed
as a capitalist" Those who have bombs to
shed need not prepare to shed them in the
vicinity of Mr.. Dillon.
To catch the speakers eye IN the Fifty
second congress it will not be necessary to
wear wire mask and chest protector.
-"
Ben Butterworth says that when abroad he
saw no pauper labor If he wiltgo DOWN. into
the protected districts of Pennsylvania he
can see manners IabOring for 50 cents a day
~
History repeats itself. Simply because Col.
John A. Cockerill of the New York Adver-
tiser, defeated the city editor of the Mail and
Express in a recent election for president of
the New York Press club. there is some talk
of organizing a new press club. This was