Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1891-12-06

1t was in Michigan week ago that
Mr.. Burbank and | went TO the drug
store to get some things in the way OF
grease paints and flake white for beau
tifying and whitening the neck and
arms for evening dress. Mr.. Burbank
inquired for some rouge de theatre.
That means theatrical rouge. give
this explanation because | am q good
French scholar, and used to translate
French novels until had severe Ill
ness which showed me how uncertain is
life, and then | made solemn promise
that / would be a better man. SO do
not translate French novels now. | am
far from what | ought to be, OF course,
yet, but | have made that much OF a
stride in the right direction.
"Got any rouge?" Mr.. B. asked.
"Any what?"
Rouge"
"Rouge?"
eyes, rouge"
"Why, believe so. What color do
you want?"
This is not the creation Of feverish
imagination or just seven fat lines TO
Llchl6 plluIcl diOuCs ~ 10 phO NSSi
nal truth, can prove it.
Near the Kentucky line, on the j. M.
& /. road, my attention was called to an
obese gentleman with chin. beard
which looked as though it had been
used for thirty or forty years as
hearth broom. He ate apples, slept
and visited the ice water end of the car,
accompanied by large barometer with
a cork in 1t.
Sometimes he would ask the rest OF
us to go with him and see what the
weather was going TO be for the blue
grass country. He generally went by
himself aud returned with happy tears
in his eyes and breath that would
polish a plate glass mirror and remove
warts, freckles, tan, superfluous hair
and Democratic votes.
Then he would take out his teeth and
cleans them neatly on the linen cover
OF the parlor car chair. He was just
that neat and pernickety that every
thing about him must be nice and clean,
even his teeth. Then he would eat an
apple with his pocketknife, carefully
wiping IL on his trousers before and
after using il. l never saw such a neat
man. Then he would go again 10 the
tank with his barometer and come back,
dignified, but courtly and kind5
Once he met a handsome little blond
boy I'm the aisle and reached out to pat
him on the head, but his weather re-
searches had worn him out pretty well,
so he missed the child and struck an old
woman from Peru, Ind, on the brow,
pulling off her spectacles and sticking
them in her lunch before he could re-
cover.
As write these lines he sits opposite
me asleep. Judging by the wrinkles In
the roof Of his mouth, would say that
he is man about sixty-eight years OF
age, but wonderfully well preserved.
He has done it himself. He has done
it by means OF alcohol. You know self
preservation is the first law OF nature.
But oughtl't to make such light and
flippant remarks about so gentle and
lovable a man as he seems to be; a man
whose whole being is as open as the day,
as fsr as the eve can reach. / feel half
ashamed now that / have exposed him
even thus to my gentle and indulgent
reader.
He shows every mark Of most kind
ly nature, and I'll bet anything that will
be respectable and not regarded as gam
bling that no hungry man ever left his
door aud no homeless wanderer ever,
with wet eyes, turned hopelessly from
that broad and welcome doormaJ at the
portals OF the home where this old gen.
tleman resides.
feel sure that no sorrowing heart
ever came to him for gentle pity and
cheer that went hungry away; no broken
winged bird with grieving cry ever
came 70 nestle 10 that broad aud reson-
ant breast to be dubbed away with cold
and cruel scorn: aud yet / grieye 10 say
that as l sit here writing these words
and look far down into his open face no
one can deny that the last time he wiped
of ki- teeth he must have been think
ing OF something else, for the lowers
are on the upper sr,e aed the vulcanized
rubber roof of his mouth Is doyn stairs.
so that he seems almost to be standis:
on his head. II makes me almost dizzy
to look at him now. So no more az
present from your true friend,
Ism AM