davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
Double and Twisted Speech.

! The New England dialect 10 still
kinky with q misuse of vowels and a
redundancy Of negatives, but thes,
pecuiarities are not blemishes; on
the contrary, they add picturesque
ness to the language.
"Yes / be-" does not mean igno-
rance, but local habit.
81 don't spose," is common to
Maine and Vermont and is used to
preface a question.
When speaking of a man who has
been unfortunate in business, our
down-east friends say: "He has fail
ed up"
OF a man who is stingy, they re-
mark that he els a little near" or
Every near"
Some of the phrases are full OF
meaning, as when they speak of one
carrying a great load, che logged it
in, which means more than fetched,
as it gives a good idea of an outlay
of strength.
In some localities, instead of say
ing che has rented q house." it is "he
has got his rent" or i've been over
and seen his rent" idioms as simple
to them as they are obscure to the
visitor.
A word in common use among the
old-fashiond people strikes the unac-
customed ear as very peculiar.
When a mans coat doesn't fit him,
they say, at lays badly" Looked
up, the word is by no means a vaga-
bond, but one of respectable antece-
dents, and found in every modern
dictionary. 1t is good old English
word meaning to fit.
A man who has "hoss" to sell
does not tell the buyer that he is
in good condition. He says in the
vernacular: "You kin trot that boss
thirty miles and back and you won't
find any outs in him."
All these little peculiarities of
speech OBTAIN" as the dialectans
would say, among the educated peo-
pie. The laborers have a language
of their own, of whom a chronicler
reports this amusing speech
Il don't s'pose there amt nobody
seen nothin' of no old ielt hat no.
where?
This exhaustive use Of The negative
is duplicated in the Same locality as
the preceding question in this way:
| don't s'pose you don't know of
nobody that don't want to hire no
body to dew nothin."
There is such picturesqueness in
this poverty OF language that we
feel sure it would lose real value in
a contest with leXicons and gram
mars and sink TO the dead level of
the commonplace. And it fits the
condition OF a free born citizou look
ing for honest employment.
1t is indeed seldom that the trust
ed vowel, or local phrase, is lingual
deformity. 1t is more often the ira
dition of family handed down from
father to son as hereditary SIS the
eyes and hair.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
Frightened to Death.
rom tho Hartford Courant.

qrrom the Hartford Courant.
G. w. Durham, prominent Ken
sington man, died recently from ef
iects of ar accident which happened
10 him while working at his occupa-
ton as a butcher. Mr.. Dunhe N wa
dressing hog, and Us he drew the
body toward him q knife, which lay
unnoticed upon the bench, was
thrust into his groin, cutting an ar
terry. DR.. Gillin, of Berlin, was sent
for, and when he arrived it was found
that surgical aid was necessary, and
Drs. Lyon and Comings, of New Brit
min. were summoned. The flow OF
blood was checked, the wound was
dressed, and the patient left in q
comfortable condition.
During the night Mr.. Durham
nwoke, and. thinking he was bleed
ing again, sent for DR.. Gillin; but
when the Doct or arrived Mr.. Dun
ham had passed away. This led the
Doctor to believe that another ar
terry must have been cut, SO an ex-
animation was held, and, as no trace
Of arterial blood was found upon the
bandage it was certain that the man
had not bled to death; and the only
theory given is that, as the patient
was very weak from loss of blood,
the sudden thought that he was
bleeding to death caused shock
which stopped the pulsations of thu
heart, or, in other words, the man
was frightened to death.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
1t Would not Draw.

A well-know Boston business man.
whose aged father resides in a Cana
iian town, recently sent TO the old
gentleman package OF prepared
mustard plasters, thinking they
would be of use in case of q recurrence
Of rheumatism, with which he had
been afflicted.
The plasters were thankfully re.
,eived and Immediately thrust into
q desk among other odds and ends.
One night, being awakened by an
acute attack of his complaint, the
Did gentleman arose from his bed,
and going to the desk, took what he
supposed was plaster, and, wet.
ting it with water placed it over thu
SPOT in which the pain was located.
For time all was quiet in his
chamber. Soon his daughter, occu.
plying a room in another part of tho
house. heard him swearing roundly.
Come in here, Annie" he cried. as
she looked into the door of his room;
'see if you can get that mustard
plaster off my back; it's as coarse as
Oran, but it don't draw bit"
Annie did as she was hidden and
gently removed square piece o,
sand-paper from his back.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

found himself lace to face with his
mortal enemy, Tom Richardson
carrying in his hand n rifle. No
alarin, no anger was exhibited by
either. Are you heeled, Jim?" asked
Richardson in quiet sort of way
"Well, no, Tom" answered James
Just as quietly. 81 forgot the shoot.
err this morning"
"Then I've got the dead wood on
YOU"
$50 you lave, Tom"
"Do you take water, Jim?"
"Oh, Yes, Tom, l take water"
"By- by, jim"
80 long, Tom" and they parted.
A mouth later James Tolmy was
again up early in the morning and
strolled of in the direction OF the
Richardson's, but this time didn't
forget his shooter" Tom Richard
son was milking his last COW.
you're a slow mixer, Tom" he
said, looking quietly over the fence
at his enemy.
Tom looked up. EYES," he replied
calmly, Il am very slow this morn
ing"
'Are you 'heeled,' 'Tom?" softly
asked the other.
"Wcll, no. You see the milk
ing
Then I've got the dead wood on
you"
"To be sure, JIM" he answered
lazily.
"Do you take water, Tom?"
ooh, yes, jim; | take water some
times, like yourself"
Good morning, Tom"
$50 long, jim" And the relent
less foes once more separated. The
feud had narrowed down to the two.
A third time they both met, now on
the banks OF the Missouri so there
was water for both. This time they
were both heeled; each had his load
ed rife. With hearts OF lions, but
stealthily as tigers, they approached
each other slowly and cautiously,
SIS there any water about?"
asked Tolmy, in bitter irony.
Not II drop, jim" was the easy
reply, and they advanced a little
closer Quick us lightning richard
son raised his rife and fired. Toll
my dropped, but ere death sealed
his eyes forever he raised his weapon
and lodged it's contents in his enc
my's heart. Both were found
dead next day within fifteen yards
of each other. This was the end of
the last act in the domestic tragedy.
But now word of poor Julia.
Passionate in love she was inconsol-
able in grief, and after the slaughter
OF the brother she had loved and OF
the lover she still adored died broken
hearted. She was buried beside the
grave of Belle, the intended of her
brother. And these are the two lit
tie graves which are the indices OF
the story.-Cecil Hastings in Omaha
World Herald.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
Congress Caters and Drown

iiiSs
Speaking OF congress CATERS and
drowning recalls Il fashionable laid
die aged physician who thoroughly
believes in this fatality. He gave it
away in this wise: While consulting
a man in delicate health about his
care for himself in the winter time the
doctog said: What kind of shoes
have you got on?" They proved to
be the fatal congress CATERS, and tho
doctor objected. Ibid you ever GEE
an account of adrowned man found
in the bay that they didn't say he
had on congress CATERS? You laugh
and say that doesn't make any diff
ference, and there is no connection OF
cause and effect.
How do you know there isn't?
You can't traceit, but Pm not certain
that congress CATERS do not tend to
such moral and physical degeneracy
that a man is liable to fall off q ferry
boat, or in fit of dependency to
jump into the river At any rate !
don't wear them. | told a wom-
an the same thing once and she
laughed. | went on, and when /
reached home found a letter from her.
saying she picked up a paper after l
went away, and the first thing found
several combinations of what | said,
and she wanted to admit that she
was convinced. New York Tribune.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
This is an Advertisement. It

contains no fun nor foolishness, but few
facts that will interest all farmers: Why do
you let the horns grow on your calves and
then have them sawed off. and rs a result have
bleeding heads, loss of appetite, in COWS, a
decrease in milk, AMI often have
one or more diei We suppose 1t is only
because you have not heard Of the
Warranted Dehorning Compound.
1t is positively guaranteed TO prevent a calf's
horns from growing, and without injury TO
the calf; leaves a perfectly smooth head !;
causes no shock to the system; can be used in
fly time, as It makes no raw surface; will keep
for years in any ciimate-will not freeze. De-
horns at a cost Of less than one cent head (;
no after treatment necessary. Our guarantee
is-"Money refunded if it fails Any bank
in Newton, Iowa, will tell you our guarantee
is good. II not for sale in your town send
sl.00 to us by postoffice money order or bank
draft and we will send at once. Testimonials
sent on application. Manufactured only by e.
L. Lyday & Co., Newton, Iowa. Agents
wanted in each county.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

From an interview, N. 7. World.
In an interview With leading drug house
then. Y. World, Nov. Q, $780, gives the follow
ing comment on the proprietors of reliable pat
ent medicines.
''He is specialist and should know more
Of the disease he actually treats than the ordi.
nary physician, for while the latter may come
across say fifty cases in year of the particular
disease which this medicine combats Its man
ufacturer investigates thousands. Don't you
suppose his prescription, which you buy ready
made up for fifty cents, is likely 10 do more
good than that Of the ordinary physician, who
charges you anything from 50 to $40 for giving
1t, and leaves you to pay the cost of having 1t
prepared.
"The patent medicine mar too, usually has
the good sense to confine himself to ordinary,
every day diseases He leaves to the physi.
clan cases In which there is Immediate danger
TO life, such as violent fevers He does this,
because, in the treatment of such cases there
are other elements of importance besides med
icine, such as proper dieting, good nursing, a
knowledge of the patients strength and so on
where the disease is one which the
patient can diagnose for himself or
which some physician has already determined
the patent medicine maker says fearlessly. Il
have u preparation which is better than any
known and which will cure you In nine
cases out of ten his statement is true.n
This is absolutely true as regards the great
remedy Tor pain, st. Jacobs Oil. 1t can assert
without fear OF contradiction, that it is a
prompt and permanent cure of pain. 1t can
show proofs of cures of chronic cases of 20, 80
and 40 years standing. In truth IT rarely ever
fails II used according to directions, and a
large proportion of cures is made by half the
contents of q single bottle. 1t is therefore the
best.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
He Got Jim,s Picture.

At one 0. the tin-typc galleries the ottsl
day gentlem an who was In waiting noticed
bov about ten years old hanging around the
door, and he becBoned him IN and asked him
what was wanted, Gays the Detroit Free Press.
could get picture herei', whispered the
lad.
"Why, yes"
slow much'll It cost"
SONY quarter You'll be next"
"But 1t isn't for me: It's q picture of my
20 that won't make any difference. Bring
him in any time"
"I-I--can't sir!" gasped the boy.
"Whyln
"Causeyhe's dead, sir; died this morning.
Upon investigation the boy was found to be
In possession of only IL cents, and after ascer-
tanning that his statements we're true, the
gentleman paid the expense Of sending the ar
fist up with his camera and securing two full
dozen types Of the pale-fsced dead. lying in
house where cold and hunger held places al
most as members of the family.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
Cinnamon Can Not Raise
Boards,

The Cinnamon covets the hair on
ais face because it is regarded as a
symbol OF authority and power.
Some four centuries ago 100000
Wanchoo Tartars swept into China
md conquered 100000 Cinnamon.
The Tartans, coming from q colder
climate than that OF China, had q
greater capacity for raising boards,
The Tartans were quickly assimilated
by the swarming Chinese, and with
the assimilation came slightly in.
creased capacity for raising hair.
This tendency has been fostered
through all the successive ages, un.
til, by assiduous cultivation, the big
chiefs are now able to raise lead.
pencil mustache. This privilege,
however, is only enjoyed by men Of
high caste.
1t would be as impossible for an
ordinary Chinese laundryman to
raise a mustache like that of Bow.
cry dime museum woman as it would
be for a COW to handle musket.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
A Peculiar fact with refer
ence to DIR. Pierce's Golden


A Peculiar fact with refer
ence to DIR. Pierce's Golden
Medical Discovery is, that,
unlike sarsaparillas and other
blood medicines, which are
said to be good for the blood
in March, April and May, the
discovery" works equally
well all tie year round, and
in all cases of blood-taints or
humors, no matter what their
name or nature.
|. It's the CHEAPEST blood
purifier sold through drug
gists.
mr.? Because it's sold
on a 1eculaar PLAN, and you
only pay for tile good you
get.
Ian you ask more!
Golden Medical Discov-
cry" is a concentrated vege-
table extract, put up in large
bottles; contains no alcohol
to inebriate, no syrup or
sugar to derange digestion;
is pleasant to the taste, and
equally good for adults or
children.
The discovery" cures all
Skin, Scalp and Scrofulous
affections, as Eczema, letter,
Salt-rheum, Fever-sores, White
Swellings, Hip joint disease
and kindred ailments.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
Strange lnratuation.

she-She isn't beautiful. WHAT'S 1t that In
fatuates hint
He-Perhaps he admires her gracefulness.
She-Maggie Fuller glacefult She does
nothing graceful III.
He-But don't you. think she grows old
very gracefullyl
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
Parasites of the Tiger.

In speaking OF the minute para
sites which are found in the hairy
part of a tigers foot, scientist
says: "They constitute one of the
most wonderful curiosities know of
in the animal world. The parasites
are so small as to be almost invisl-
BILE to the naked eye, and yet each is
perfect counterpart of the tiger;
head, ears, jaw, legs claws, body,
tail, all are there. You may think
this is big story, but look the sub
iect up and see if it is not so. New
York Tribune.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
In the CAPITOL Lobby.

strnger-Who is that fine looking gentle
mani
Washingtonian-That That's Grlmshaw,
the noted coiner, who was acquitted in the
United States court last week
Stranger-Who is that man near him who
ooks like a counterfeiter--his partner!
Washingtonian-That Why, that's Con
gresham Henshaw, the author of the free
coinage bill.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

Take the Burlington Route" q. B. & q. r.
fR. In connection with the Denver a. Rio
lGrande r. X. the scenic line OF the world,
for all points In New Mexico, Utah, Nevada,
Montana, Idaho, Washington and California.
Enquire of, or write TO z. A. Hunter, Gener
al Agent, 232 Fourth street, Kirkwood House
block, Des Moines.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
Divining Her Weakness.

Henpekt-That new doctor you
introduced me to, Bowler, is great
symptomotologist-great student
of human nature.
Bowler-Suits you, does he?
Henpckt-To dot. Had him in
to treat my vile for a cold;
said she didn't need any medi-
cine, but that she must be particular
above all things, to keep her mouth
shut and breethe through her nosc.-
Boston Courier.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

Mistress-I am at loss to understand your
motive in leaving
Brdlget-The work is too harrud mum, and
it's worn out be entirely.
Mistress-Why, I've done the most OF 1t my.
self.
Bridget-Yes, but it's worn out be hear
ing yez tell about it,
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
An Exciting Game.

Idaho-Well, I'll raise YOU a silver mine.
Nebraska-Ill call you What you gotl
Idaho-Three senators, I'll take the pot.
INebraska-Hold on there. Three senators
amt good.
Idaho--What you gotl
Nehraska-Three governors.
ldaho-Take 1t. Three governors lays over
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

potatoes as stock food, claims that they cannot
be beaten by any food tried as a milk producer,
and that hogs fed on them fatten faster than
when fed on milk aud corn In addition their
well-known table qualities make them veg
etable well worth raising, especially as they
are so easily grown.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
Progress.

1t is very important in this age Of vast ma
terial progress that remedy be pleasing TO
the taste and to the eye, easily taken, accept
able to the stomach and healthy in its nature
and effects, Possessing these qualities, Syrup
of Figs is the one perfect laxative and most
gentle diuretic known.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
A Fit Subject.

The mesmerist-Wil some one who is ac-
quainted here kindly select good subject and
ask him to step ups
Voice from the audience-You don't want a
man of strong will power, 90 you!
Mesmerist-No, sir. just the opposite.
Noice-Here he Is; the only man In the
crowd who allows his wife to select his neck
ltias for him
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

browns Bronchial Troches' are
excellent for the relief OF Hoarseness and Sore
Throat. They are exceedingly efIectiye."-
Christian World, London, Eng.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

When Baby was sick, we gave her c0storis,
When she was Child, she cried for Castcria,
When she became Miss, she chung to castoris,
When she had Children. she gave them Castoria
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
w. N. U. ID. M--90S.

| tE-ln applying TO any OF the above adyer
tisers, do not forget 10 say that you saw the
J advertisement in this paper
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

You wear out clothes on washboard ten
times as much as on the body" HoU foolish.
Buy Dobbins Electric soap of your grocer and
save this useless wear. Made ever since 1894.
Don't take limitations. There are lots of them
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

cbeerfully recommend Salvation on for
chilblains and sprains. We have tested It at
home for these troubles, and three applica-
boss llnameht
J. J. NORFOLK (of J. J. Norfolk q Bro.)
COS. Charles St BALTIC. Md
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

n sFALJ NOFHTy HOtIc.
Halls Catarrh Cure Is taken internally and
acts directly on the blood and mucous surfaces
iof the system. Send for testimonials, free.
+. j. CHENEY & CO., Toledo, o.
eS3 Sold by Druggists, 75c.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

Chiffon mousseline Is new material intro
duced In Paris during the last summer and APP
'pearlng here last fall. 1t is a crinkled silk
muslin, and adds one more TO the list Of airy
fairy fabrics.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

The English red coats, the gay red-cloth
Spanish jackets for afternoon drives. and the
dark Spanish surouts and redingotes for walk
Ing are mach In favor
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

IL win bet that woman's terror holding
her own,n was remarked al the reception
what makes you think 500" II never saw
one show more backbone"
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
STATE OF ONO, CRY OF ToLEDo,

FRANK J. CHENEY makes oath that he is
County and State aforesaid, and that said firm
will pay the sum Of ONE HUNDRED DOL
LARS for each and every case of CATARRH
that cannot be cured by the use of HALLS
lCATARRu CURE.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

Garfield Tea, harmless heros accomplishes
benefits resulting from cat lttiss and avoids
pleasant and often injurious enecis or pursative
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

New Reporter-What do the editors mean
by this word fake that they use all the times
Old Reporter-That refers to the lies in the
other paperl
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

Disappointment first comes in life 10 the
baby who has q horn given to him for pres
ent and then finds he hasn't wind enough TO
blow IT,
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
More Cohesive.

. Mrs. HI think they win always love each
other devotedly, there gre such "Bonds of
Love- between them.
Mrs. B-"Government Bonds" are better.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

Mrs. Younghusband-Now that 1t Is the new
year, John, I hope you will be able TO say no
and 6y the way, John, won't you let me have
little money! John (heroically)-No.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
A Fact.

"What recheTcne sort OF an atfiiction you
have,n said Goodword to the man with a boil.
Such swell gatheringl"
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
Sweet Potatoes for stock.

In sporting parlance the man who pollutes
the outer air withsa donated ci gar is @ rank
nutsfder
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

Swedish Asthma Cure never fails.
Send address Trial package mailed free.
Collins Brothers Drug Co., st. Louis, Mo.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29
VASEIINB-

Or for stamps any single article at the price,
If you have occasion 10 use Vaselne in any form
be careful to accept only genuine goods put up by
In original packages. A great many druggists
trying to persuade buyers to take VASELINE put
up By them. Never yield to such persuasion. as the
article is imitation without value, and Will not
give you the result you expect. A bottle of Blue
Seal yaseline Is sold by all druggists at cents
CHEsEBRoUGH H'rS. Co.. "a State ST.. New York.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

If you do a man favor do not let him know
il, or the chances are he will come back for an
other lift
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

White crepes decline, with sprays of flowers
embroidered In natural colors, are beautiful
for evening dresses. These crepes come In
forty five inch width, with a hemstitched hem
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1891-01-29

Among the most stylish and elegant capei
are those of black mink skins with the fashion
able Queen Anne collar, the front Of the capc
being fitted to the figure