The Saline County journal. [volume] (Salina, Kan.) 1871-1893, 1891-05-07

| AMOSu THE SPIRITS.
Ny naburs is mourn harf crazy on tn
new-fanRled idear shout Sperrrts. Spei
retooul Sircles is held nitely q 4 or
long harpd fellers has settled here an
gone into the Sperret biznis exclusively
A aternt was made TO git Mrs. A. War
10 embark into the Spsrret biZnis bu
the atemt failed. I Of the long hare
fellers told her she was n ethereal creete
& woOd make n sweet mejium. WHARF
upon she attact him with a mop handl
and drove him out Of the hOuse. vii
hear Obsarve that Mrs. Ward is a inval
cradle wOmun-the partner Of my COY
q the shairer Of my sJrrers. In my sb
sunse she wAtchis my interests q thing
with a Eagle Eye & when return sh
welcums me in afectiOnate stile. Trooll
Il is with us ~ il WAS with Mr.. & Mrs
lHGoNER in the Play. to whit.
ssJI-s with but a singh. hast
harts uhich bet as
Ny nabnrs injOoced me to attend q
Sperrctppll Sircla at Squire Smiths
when | arruye | found the east room
chOck full includin all the old maids in
the yillige g. the long harl Teller s4said
When I went in ! was salOOtid with
there Gums the b-nitel man"-"heal
Gums the hory -hedel unbeleever"-"her,
Gums the skoffer at tronth." etsettery,
etsettery.
SEE I, my frens. it's troo I'm hear, &
now bring on yOur Sperrrts"
Of the long haired fcll-rs riz up and
sell he would state few remarks. He
sed man was n Critter - intelIeck & was
movin ON tn Cole. Sum men had big
ger intcllecks than other men had and
they wOOd git To the Cole the sDOnerest.
Sum men were beests d wUOi never git
into the Cole at all He sed the Firth
was material but man was immaterial,
and hens WAS different from the Firth.
The Firth. contInnered the speaker, re-
solves round ON its own axeltree once
in 81 hours. hut n man haint gut no
axeltree he can't resolve. He sed the
ethereal essunce Of the coordinate
branchis Of superhumIn natur becum
mettymorfusSed "a man progrest in har-
mOnial coexistunce & eventOOally anty
humanized themselves & turned into
reglar sperretuellers. This was Yersif-
ferusly applauded by the cumpany. and
rs | make il n pint TO get along as pleas
ant as possible, | sung ont, bully for
yOu, old boy."l
The cuInplny then drew round the
table and the Sirrlr kGmmcrlst TO go it
They axed me IL there was anybody in
the Sperret land which wood like to
convarse with. Ised il Bill TOmpkins,
who was Onct my partner in the show
bizuis, was sober, should like to con-
varse with him a few periods.
as the Sperret Of William Tompkins
present. sed Of the long haired chaps.
and there was three knox ON the table.
SCI I. william. how goes Il, Old
Pretty ruff, old hOss." he replide.
Air yOu in the show biZniZ. William
sd I.
He sed he was. lie se1 he & John
Bunyan was travelin with side show
in connection with ShailsDcrc. JonsOn q
Co.'S Cirrus He SD old Bun (meanin
MIR. BunyGn,l stirsl up the animils &
ground the organ while h. tended door.
Occashunally Mr.. Bunyan sung n comic
'ung. The Circus was doin midlin well.
Bill Shakspepr lIs1 made q CRATE hit with
Id Bob Ridley, AMI H-n Jonson was
ielitin the peple with his O. Joly CRATE NJ
II hOs>Inanship without sIliul or bridal.
Seq !, William, my lnvly friend. can
TUu pay we that % dollars you owe me-
He sed no with one u the most tremen-
is knox ] ever experiunsed
The Sircle sed he had gone. Air you
zone, William Axed. "Rayther," he
-eplide. and I knowd it was no use 10
Jursoo the subjeck furder.
then called fur INV farther.
''Howis things. daddy
"Middlin, my son. middlin."
Amt yOu proud Of. your orfurn
DoyT'
''Scacelv."
Why not. my parient:"
"BecawZ yuu hav gone to writin for
he neOSpapers, nv son. Bimeby you'll
ne all your character for trOoth and
'errasserty. When helPt you into the
how biznis told you 10 diguerfy that
here prOfeshun. Litteratoor Is low
He alSD statid that he was doin mid
lin wei in the peanut biznis q liked Il
'uity we'll. tho the clmit was rather
TarIn.
When the SiTcis stnpt thay axed me
rhat I thawt oft
SEE |. MY frens, I've Ian into the |
how bixnis now gOin on 23years. THERE'S
artikil in the COnstitOoshun of the
United States which SCI in effeck that |
verYbody may think just as he darn |
leazes, a them IL my sentiments 10 a
are. You dOwtlis believe fhis sperret |
Octin while think Il Is little MKT. /
ust as soon as a man becums n reglar Il
ut q cut Sperret rapper he leeFes orr
TOrhin. lets his hare grow al over his
ass & cOmmenSis spungin his livip out
other peple. He eats ALI the dick
hunaries he can find g. goze round
bOck full Of big words, scaril the VIM
lin folks & little children q destrOyin
be piece Of mind O. evry famsrle be en-
~ He don't do nobody no good q d
cuss 10 society q = pirit on honest
eple's corn beef barrila Admittin an
on say aboWt the doctrin 10 be troo,
Iust say the reslar perfeszionai ersrxit