Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1891-11-15
motives, but how often we ask for divine

motives, but how often we ask for divine
guidance while packing our things!
| Chicago has several distinct advan-
tages over New York which strike q
traveller at once. One OF them is the
rapidity with which one gets his bag
gage in Chicago. When you land in
New York or approach the city we'll
informed and talented gentleman carry
| Ing large mass OF echoing brasses on 8
big wire key ring goes through your
| train with a little memorandum book
and agrees to transfer your luggage to
your home or hotel before you can pos
sibly get there yourself.
You have rashly sgreed to get mar
ried on your arrival. perhaps, or you
may have accepted an invitation TO be
| present at large dinner where you will
make few spontaneous, typewriter
| remarks. So when this able and thor
oughly we'll informed baggage checker
man takes your check and your address
you heave sigh Of relief and begin to
drink in the picturesque beauties of
Elizabeth and Jersey City, those beau
tiful abodes Of wealth and beauty, ard
with Joy you sniff the rich aroma from
the bone works along your route. You
feel assured that when you get to your
inn or your chocolate colored fat in
One Hundred and Thirty-ninth street
your trunk will be on the stoop with
glad welcome and one hinge waiting for,
you.
But after several bitter experiences
in this way you finally give IL up and
yield to despair. / do not know how
many happy weddings have been
broken of by the Express and Transfer
and General Mephistopheles Associa'
ton, OF New York, or how many i'm
promptu speeches have died in the
bosom of the typewriter because OF this
great incorporated disappointment COM
pany.
Once got my trunk on time, but my
wife did not. We were to go together
somewhere, for We were not then posted
regarding New York customs So We
were to 60 together. 1t was an evening
affair, and it was full dress. / wanted
to wear my full dress for had nice
new suit with embroidery down the side
of the leg. Ut was my first effort In
Il
try It, but my wife said nay. 1t would
be very rude and de trop to wear even
Ing toys when she appeared In street
dress.
So relented and went In short coat
with hectic hectic and mingled with
those who were clad in the severest
evening dress throughout. No one
knows how many hearts have bled over
these sickening delays and disnppoint-
ments. / remained month in New
York at that time hoping for another
invitation which would necessitate even
ing toilet, but no one asked me out.
In Chicago the railways come almost
into the center Of the city on the north,
west, and south, and when you have
bathed your features, and looked under
the bed for burglar, and rummaged
the drawers Of the dressing case for for
gotten hosiery and the bric-a-brac u
departed guests, the porter knocks
softly ct your door and wheels In on
rubber tired truck your welcome trunk.
1t is very great comfort and delight
Last week | met man on the train
who got even with me In way de-
splSe. lie nau Dcen NY Bucsb ouSc az
home for week, and certainly tried
to make it pleasant for him during that
time. He remained at the house as
much the proprietor as / was. He got
I'D when he felt like IL in the morning,
and his breakfast was ready for him.
We saved out the tender corner OF the
steak for him, and though we didn't al.
ways like to do 1t, we refused the second
Joint Of the fowl because we knew he
liked IL and his nerves were not quite
strong, being sort OF genius-the kind
OF genius that does not think IL has to
be responsible; that kind OF intellectual
child wonder that ignores the dull de-
tail OF receipted bills and just equiva-
lent to people who have no genius.
You have seen such genius. 1t ex-
lists in every profession. He Is the Kind
OF man who walks over the PROSTATE
bodies OF his friends and regards his
wife as misguided being who has been
mercifully permitted TO stand around and
admire him and reach up under his