davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22
The nriAe.Na.ia In the Past,

The duties Of the bridesmaid were in
olden times more important than at the
present day. She attended the bride
elect in her shopping expeditions and
helped direct the invitations, il these
were used. She also helped to dress
the happy maiden. and made herself
particularly entertaining to the guests
in waiting upon them and putting them
at ease. 1t is said that the bridesmaid
was often the one who had the best
time at wedding, and it frequently
happened that she captured q husband
for herself. as the English termed it,
and II she did not do this much she
was looked upon as unattractive in
deed. Hence the old saying. Three
times q bridesmaid never a bride. ~
An English superstition is that the
maid must throw away all the pins
used in the brides toilet, or else evil
fortune would follow her. and she who
kept any of these need not hope to be-
come q bride before the following
Whitsuntide.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22
HIS ENGLISH FAILED HIM.
A Ger man Who Thought lie Had Mas.
tered tho Language.

a Ger man Who Thought lie Had Ma.
tered tho Language.
When the United States ship Ports
mouth reached Hampton roads recent.
ly. fresh from the West Indies shs
found in that port the German Man.
of-war Nike. and in the course Of a
few days warm friendship was esab-
lished between the young officers Of
the two ships. Frequent visits wera
in order. Among the German officers
there was one young man who thought
who knew-that he had mastered
the whole English language in his
short month in American waten
He was 90 sure of this that he hasten
ed to exhibit his fiuency whenever any
Of the American officers were about
This led to trap which awoke the
German somewhat rudely to realzs.
ton of his error. He was On board
the Portsmouth. cOnversing with .
knot Of officers. when a shower came
up. This is quite malignant
storm. he said. positively. :.
YES" replied Ensign G.. who steoa
near by. ''but its only half as bad q
it would be il it were twice as o@
a. 1t is" remark which caused 'ns
German to stare blankly at the speaS'
er. He couldn't grasp it, :,
"Heye" he finally said. with daaea
air
'Oh! / merely remarked. said "
that it might have been if it Was aaa
1t would have been If it could, ou'
1t hadn't it didn't-see?" ;,
But the German didn't see Nv
edged his way slowly toward the gang
way as though bereft of his senses
His eyes were CLASSY, his face ~a'
pallid and careworn. They never " y
him again. IN. Y. Times.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22
CHURCH AND STATE.
A Few Verbal Due,s In Whichthe for"e'
Came ON Victor.

Came ON Victor.
Tradition tells OF fiery Anglo
Indian colonel who. getting into hot
DISPUTE with a portly clergyman. re-
marked pointedly. 1T is a pity that
black ants should not be useful IN pro-
portion to their size" Wherein the
parson at once retorted. 1T is great
or pity that red ants. which are 80 In.
significant, should yet be so offensive.
Another collision of this kind be-
tween church and state, in which the
church again had the best OF 1t. Is
said to have occurred at an English
public dinner, where would-be-witty
officer asked ~ well-knOwn colonel
bishop, who sat next to him, whether
he could tell the difference between q
bishop and a donkey. and then pro-
ceeded to explain that the one wears
the cross on his head. and the other
wears it on his back.
Very good. Major B. said the
bishop. But now, can you tell the
difference between an army officer and
a donkey"
No my lord, I cannot" replied
the major.
Nor can IT, rejoned the bishop,
quietly.
Even this however. was surpassed
by another passage OF repartee De-
tween the gown and the sword which
is still preserved among the society
legends OF Calcutta. A certain ia
nous English general. the hero OF the
two Eastern wars found his health be-
ginning to give way beneath the strain
of long and arduOus service, aud was
ordered home by his doctors. On the
day of his embarkation for England
he was accompanied by a vast crowd
of friends. to whom he began to dis
tribute various small tokens Of his re.
gard.
We'll. general" asked the bishop
of Calcutta, who was one Of the party.
..have you no memento to leave to an
old friend like me?"
.Oh, l have not forgotten you, my
lord" cried the general. ''On the
contrary. l have bequeathed to You my
entire stock of impudence.
Ten thousand thanks. my dear
general, replied the undaunted bish-
op. You have given me by far the
largest and most valuable part OF your
property"
And then the bishops wife turned
to her husband, aud said. sweetly.
MY DEAR am glad to see that you
have come into your legacy SO soon"
-Harper's Magazine.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22
ACCIDENTS.
Strange Facts COncerning Disasters in
Various Businesses

Strange Facts COncernlng Disasters in
Various Businesses
The collection OF large groups of
facts about accidents which has been
made necessary by the development of
accident insurance has made contri-
button to one department of social
science that is by no means uninterest-
ing. For instance. it is a curious fact
that a man is much more likely to lose
his left hand than his right hand, or
his left eye than his right eye; statis-
tics show. too that when a man in
sures himself against accidents he
thereby greatly diminishes the risk of
accident-and this is probably ex-
planned in this way: when a mans at
tention is called to a danger he fixes
his mind on it. and thereby conscious
ly or uncOnsciOusly makes unusual ef-
fort to avert it. 1t therefore happens
that man is more likely to be VIC
tim OF an accident Of a kind that he
never thought Of. than OF the kind
against which he insures himself. A
man. for instance. who handles sharp
tools will insure himself against an &C
cident from the use of them. and the
first thing he knows he will be draw
ing pay from an insurance company
for an injury done by getting q cinder
in his eye. Not only are such odd and
curious facts 40 these brought to light
by the development Of accident insur-
ance but a great many important
groups of facts which bear upon the
habits OF mon and the development Of
civilization. For instance, accidents
are much more common in the sparse
y3settled portion of the country than
in the densely settled portions and
they happen more frequently in the
middle Of winter and the middle of
summer than In any other seasons Of
the year.-The Forum.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22
All He wanted 70 Know.

''Did you say your brother had a
detective camera?" said Herbert to
Ethel.
Yes"
'Of course everybody knows that
photographs can be made by electric
light"
Certainly"
And your father is putting incan-
descent burners into the house,"
He is."
That is all l want to know" and
Herbert left, never to return.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22
About An Arch bishop.

There is q good story told o. w
late archbishop OF Dublin Dr. Iren.I
says the Dublin Times. In his ave
years the good archbishop haa Wv
idea that he was suffering IRON :
cipient paralysis and was aNs
fancying that he detected more or ~.
Of dumbness in his limbs. on Wv
occasion he was at dinner P'.v ;,,
and it was noticed that he was w..
silent for while and looked g'a,
At the same time it was observer 'I ..
the lady at his right-hand sloo .,,
blushing deeply. At last MS
said In q lanentable voice: ...s
my worst fears are realizeo'
can be no longer any doubt Of II .,ie
''Of what?" asked the symps'"'
hostess. In
That paralysis has really n ~,
hold OF me, " answered the arcno's.i
Il am sure OF it. Ihave been p min.
ing my right knee for severa ..r
utes and l cannot feel the ie"'
satiOn." -. %
The lady on the right was ''
comfort him. :. ,oa
II hope it is not 50 bad - ~.
think. she said; 'lt was ny
you were pinching." ,. Al alb
A silk dress feels very iik9 ,,.kA
apron. hence the archbishops
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22
HE WASN'T DEAF,
The Predlcame Of Hostess who IRE.
aumed TO Much,

The Predlcamemt OF Hostess who Prs-
aumed to Much.
It 10 never wise to presume upon the
misf0rtunes OF Others and many a Der.
son has come to grief by saying things
which he did not wish overheard BY
the very ears which have been most
quick to catch them. The only safe
rule, says the Boston Courier. is not ia
say things which one would not be
willing that everyone present should
understand.
A gentleman who has been afflicted
with deafness returned homo from a
visit to the city. and soon after went
to call on lady OF his acquaintance.
He found her ut home. and with her a
cousin Of hers who was paying her a
visit. The hostess received him with
politeness and introduced him to her
cousin. but to the introduction she
added. In a perfectly audible tone:
Hes a good man enough; but he's
terribly stupid and "a deaf 40 post
The gentleman changed color . little.
Il may be stupid. he said, but
am no longer rs deaf As . post. for
have been cured during my absence.
and can hear as we'll as anybody"
1t is needless to say that the call
was rather awkward after this opening.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22
HOW BILL CROSSED THE DIVIDE
Saw tho Tops OF the Mountains ON tho
Other Side.

, Saw tho Tops OF the Noun aims ON the
Other Side.
Bill raised himself tremblingly upor
his arm and looked at me with q
strange pallor gathering in his face.
was alarmed and tried to persuade him
10 lie down. But he would not and re.
NAMED in his upright posture. resting
against me for support.
Ralph" he said in hoarse whis-
per. do you remember the time we
crossed the divide together and wen,
to prospectin' on the slopeo"
''Yes. Bill" answered soothingly.
''but we'll talk about that some other
time. You must be quiet now"
II can't be quiet. Ralph. I'm run.
min down. can't last long an
must speak, Ralph!'
Eyes. Bill?"
1--WE had a hard tussel when we
crossed. didn't we!"
ut was rough trip. Bill"
But we kept cheerin' each other on
by takin' about the Golden Gate and
the yaller dust we was goin' to git
didn't weT'
YES. Bill"
I'VE were goin' to become rich in a
few months Ralph, but that was thir-
ty years ago. an here We are in the
same old rut."
/ didn't speak and Bill continued:
AN the Golden Gate-there Wasn't
much sparkle about that, was thereo"
..Only rocks. Bill"
Then Bill was silent His head fell
on his breast and l was about to Law
him down when he reused up and
whispered:
Ralph. old friend. am l goin' to
find any gold across the divide?"
could not answer him. My heart
was full and turned from his plead
ing eyes.
"'Cause l can see the white tops of
the mountains" he went on, shading
his eyes with one trembling hand and
looking up at the dark rafters. land
they re harder range than the Rock
les, Ralph" he shivered There's a
cold wind comes down from the snow
an ice on their tops an it makes me
cold. Let me lay down. Ralph. an
cover me up. There-thank you, old
boy. I'm afraid" he added after a
pause. that my life amt been right
I'm afraid shant find anything but
rocks when | get there. No Golden
Gate. )" he unused YEARLY. as his eyes
closed, 'only rOcks-rocks.
And / wept beside him and lived an
age in the hours that night. And when
the sun came and threw its beams
over the lonley mountain my comrade
had gone. He had crossed the
divide. Free Press.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22
HE HAD THE BULGE ON THEM.

There Are Some Advantage. in Being
Educated by Doctors.
/ hadn't but one cigar to offer. and
there were four men on the bench. In
this emergency the man on the end
observed:
Boys, it's only enough for ono to
smoke. and moves that it goes to the
best dedicated of u.s."
There was considerable growing at
this. but holding the cigar aloft he
continues:
The man who can spell the best
gets the cigar. Tho wora is pneumo.
mia. Go ahead. Jack"
Not one OF the three dared tackle it
and the end man calmly lighted the
cigar and began smoking.
How do you spell it?' l asked, As
he looked up and winked.
why. SIR" he whispered. .it's
n-e-w-m-O-n-e-y. OF course. Where I
got the bulge on the boys was in being
in the hospital with it for four weeks
and kept track Of how the doctors
spelled tn. Y. World.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22
OUTWARD BOUND.

Out upon the unknown deep,
Where the unheard oceans sound,
Where the unseen Islands sleep,
Outward bound
Following towards the silent west,
Ger the horizons curved rim
On TO islands OF the blest,
He with me and with him,
Outward bound.
Nothing but q speck we seem
In the waste of waters round,
Floating, floating like dream,
Outward bound.
but within that tiny speck
Two brave hearts with one accord
Past al turnult, pain and wreck,
Look up calm and praise the Lord,
Outward bound.
-Dinah Unlock Craik
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22
WHlMS AND FANClES.

A Puvallup brave is known a. Yuhr
Nawt lnnyt.
Clara-''Mr Bristle. the artist, wants
me to stand for him as a model" Maude
what! Is he studying geometry pr
Cloak Review
ut says here the last Of the 600 have
just died. They were noble band" 81
didn't know they were q band. l thought
they were cavalry. Life.
Bishop Gullem--''So you think heaven
Is like Boston do your Mrs. b. from
the Hub)-'Oh, Of course. not exactly: I
don't expect too much. Life.
Mrs. O'Brien-''Hev yez a son in the
pinitincherys' Mrs. Ryan-"Yis, me dear.
Shure, Oh hev nOine uf EN-. an We couldn't
ixpict thin aul to he good Life.
'Eoodness. John! How queer baby
looks believe he is going to have q at. :
BY George. l believe you are right.
Where's my amera''--Detroit Free Press
Mrs. Keyboard-"Why do you always
sit at the hotel piano. You can't play a
note" Old Stokes Neither can anyone
else while Pm here. "-Munsey's Weekly
Mr.. Bloobumper There's nothing Gro.
tistical about Goslin" Miss Dollie (ssr.
castical!y)-''Nof' Mr.. B--.I heard tim
say Yesterday that he hated a fol. -
Brooklyn Life.
little boy, the son Of good Presbv.
terrain parents, was asked the question in
catechism, What Is tie chief end of man y,
and he answered: 'Man's chief end Ia tn
glorify God and annoy him forever.
What makes writer use such an ax.
preston as The swors roundlvru asksd
Nippans' II don't know, y replied Psnnibs,
unless the hero was in perjury case and
Jailed to swear squarely w ashinptop
Post
"A teacher in New Jersey was hearing
her class in natural history recite. and
calling up bright looking little girl
asked: ''What Is a ruminnfinU .r;,,eI,,,
One that chews her cubs" was the limo.
cent reply.
Over the shop door Of pork butcher in
. village in one of the eastern counties of
England may be seen a sign board repre-.
senting man In black coat brandishinq
. Ratchet, with the inscription: John
Smith kills pigs like his father"
An elephant about to cross frail bridge
requested the mahout astride his neck b
dismount. "Arrah, now" said the ma.
noot' with true oriental obstinacy, ..wud
ye DC havin' me walk across wild va an
make TWO NV us ON the bridge at wancea,
ferceiving that bulk was the same thing
Is Drains. the elephant hid away his feel
ings In his trunk and moved on.-Ssu
Francisco Examiner
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22
Can Animals Talkl

Sir Thomas Brown. in dealing with
Vulgar Errors" not only maintains
that animals may be made to talk, but
gravely cites instances to prove that
elephants. at least. have been actually
taught to speak. One of these know.
ing creatures in Portuguese India, &C.
cOrding to Mr.. Brown. stubbornly re.
fused to do what he was bid until il
was commanded solemnly in the name
OF the King OF Portugal upon which
the beast answered.: Il will, I willr'
very distinctly in the Malabar Ian.
euage.
Sir Thomas is also at great pains 70
point out the fact that the oral con.
formation of apes indicates their ca.
pacity for reasonable articulation. We
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22
RELICS OF THE RuEc..
Prairles Covered with their r.,A. !.
ing Commerce Of thai.

frA'fie' Uoverea with their ratA.--u..
Ing Commerce Of their soass =
After travellers on the Co..
Pacific are farely launched uros
great plains west of Mauitoh. !. ''e
see many reminders of the hus '''
Stretching over the plains a. "a, ~'N
the eye can reach, crossing one ,n..' :
sr in a perfect network. are the -.
merable paths in which the bus., aa
trOd one behind another in -,
countless numbers. The little kna''s
too. are thickly dotted with h., Sls
wallows, where the animals. hs.Y 1870
up the earth with their hosn.u
then rolled in the dust, Or whst y. 90
ed them better, visited the ~.n suit
after a shower, and enjoyed thu y
ury Of a mud bath. Here and th ~
too. one sees the skeletons Of N. s's
BILE animal. But not MANY n, n NJ
are seen from the railroad ,.,. .hsa
nearly all the skeletons within s.I TX
miles OF the track have been o.,h.. ea
together and brought to the railro. sa
where they are piled up. readv =.
shipment. At many OF the sta,;.' :"
and in some places far from tho .,s
tions. these great piles OF buffalo NJ -.
are heaped. They are laid I'm - . ..s
ularly rs SO much cord wood ~
piles are about eight feet high, txs'u'
feet wide, and anywhere from sf.s.s
to fifty feet long. The outer lay .1
Is made by piling up the skulls win
the frontal outside, and within th; n.
wall the bones are hcaped promise
ously. sssA'
1t will give an idea of the eno.mo..
quantity Of these skeletons when \.
fact Is mentioned that within ras;n,
OF two miles OF a station on the MI,
read to Prince Albert $500 skel.,o.,
were picked up. Out OF sight Of n,
railroad track. these skeletons mas
still be found in countless numba.:
and the industry OF gathering than
will be continued until they have N
been removed from the prairies
These animals were Tho victim,
very largely OF the Indians. who kil4d
the stupid beasts frequently only u
get their tongues. which We're estssme3
by the Indians rs particularly ali.
cate morsel. The bones are taken IA
Chicago and other places where sue,,
Is refined. are ground up and Nav
some part in the work of refining.
favorite diversion of many of the tour
lists when the train stops is to visit ops
OF the bone heaps knock out a few
buffalo teeth. and carry them away a,
relics.
The wood buffalo which is allied
to the bison now extermiua,ea
still roams in the forests far
north OF the Saskatchewan. lila
numbers, however. are constantly
decreasing, and there is every pros
pect that he will meet the fate OF his
prairie relative. In the course Of
| time as ranches are extended and
grasses are sown. the buffalo paths
and wallows will he obliterated. and
no relics of the bison will then bs
found on the great prairies which
were once all his OWN. Y. Sun
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22
An lnsplraelOn.

A bard sat at the dining board
Whence all but him had fed
Excepting, il you please, the dane
Who graced the tables head,
And as the latter asked of him
In speech as smooth as glass
II he the plate of butter would
Be kind enough to pass,
He struck an attitude, and then
The oleum did reach,
And as he passed the same to her
Exclaimed In brand Of speech
That quite revealed the poet-soul
That did within him CLEAN
"Life's butter passing dream" he said
"Life's butter passing dream"
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22
In Japan.

What Europeans mostly find the
want of in Japan, when they have to
live upon the food of the country, is
wheaton bread. which is quite un-
known. and all milk products. The
japanese do not use milk either unso-
phisticated or in any other form, such
as butter or cheese. and most of them
dislike the taste OF it intensely. It is
given like medicine in the hospitals
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22

Charley has had such bad luck
with watches, said young Mrs locker;
''he lost two because they got satur-
ated." Charley said they got soaked. ~
remarked her mother. II know. but
saturated 10 . prettier word and means
the same thing. These rains are so
penetrating. suppose they got into
the works aud rusted, them. Wash
ington Star.
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22

They have . curious custom at the
burial Of married women In Brazil.
The comm. hearse and the livery Of the
driver must be Of bright scarlet the
four white horses drawing the hearse
must be covered with scarlet nets, and
scarlet plumes must deck the horses
heads
Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1891-10-22

know that birds Of no intolligence
whatever have shown remarkaoie
powers in the acquisition OF language
st. Louis Republic.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-03
Months.
5. Value.

None of the tin plate will be required
by the canneries this season. They
have received all the cans they want at
the canneries, or have them stored
away elsewhere. They will therefore
pay no more for cans next month when
the import duty is higher than they
paid at the opening of the season.
"You see," said one of the officers OF a
big fruit and fish cannery to D. R. re-
porter today, "the importers and dealers
in tin plate anticipated the advance in
the tariff, even when the Mckinley bill
was under consideration in committee.
They must have been Republicans and
wanted protection, eh? Well, at all
events, many months ago we got notice
of an advance in the price of cans. Last
year we paid only $26 thousand for cans.
Since the raise we are required to pay
$3.50 thousand. The advance in tin
plate was also made four or five months
ago. The price was raised from $4.75
to $3.50 and $500 box.
Naturally one would suppose that the
increased cost of tin cans would cause
an advance in the price of canned goods.
So far we have made no material differ
ence, although in time Isuppose we will
be forced to raise the price OF our pro-
ducts as it costs US more to turn them
out. When the stock of tin plate on
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-03

And why not? The same shystering
manipulation of the tariff on. tin. plate
which parcels out $S42, ,725 to California
speculators, has surely expanded the
amount to $4,000, 600 or $4,000, 900 for
the whole United States. Thus we have
the tin plate proposition reduced to big
initial steal, and to gamble for cinch
on the consumer for all time to come !;
for our infant industries, bless their
dear little hearts, never lose their in
fantile characteristics. When they are
six feet high, and wear top boots, they
clamor for the protection bottle.
To be sure, Billy Mckinley knew
nothing of the tremendous largess he
was giving to tie spectators and mid
dlemen at the expense of the consumers
and producers. Oh! not he! His heart
is without guile. He wouldn't wrong a
man for anythlng-in horn. Mean
while, the actual producer of tin can 60
and whistle or blow on his fingers,
whichever exercise may please him
best. Mckinley and bis tribe have no
use for him.