Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1891-01-23
The Cat as a Humorist,


To speak of the cat as humorist in any
shape or form sounds, we admit, some
thing very like contradiction in terms.
There are hundreds of people-and by peo-
pie we mean, of course, only those who be-
long to the fraternity of cat lovers, and are
bound by that subtle tie of freemasonry
that unites all the adherents of the white,
the black, the tortoise shell, the gray, the
mustard and the tabby-who are prepared
to maintain that the notion of humor must
be altogether ASSOCIATED from the cat, and
that dignity, degenerating in few excep-
tional cases into pomposity on the one
hand, or insolence and cynicism on the
other. is her special quality, and indeed
the only one marked enough to deserve
particular attention.
Though we do not altogether agree with
this theory, we are prepared to acknowl-
edge that it is the one ordinarily enter
tanned, and further to admit that up to a
certain point there is a good deal to be said
for it. Looked at merely from one point
of view, cats are all dignity and reserve,
and display hauteur of demeanor which
marks them off as the aristocrats of the
animal world-their absolute refusal to
hurry, even under the greatest provocation,
is alone enough to earn them the right to
rank as natures nobility We have seen q
tabby with black muzzle who, for cold,
calculated and yet perfectly well bred in
science could have given points to a spite
full dowager duchess whose daughter-in-
law wasn't one of us, you know. "-London
Spectator.
Great Antiquity of African Pygmies,
There has been no change or progress of
any kind among the pygmies of the forest
since the time of Herodotus. As the bird
has buildt it's nest, the bee its cell and the
ant it's new colony, the pygmies have sur
yiyed the lapse of twenty-three centuries,
and have continued to build their beehive
huts after the same skilless fashion as they
built them in the days when Herodotus re-
cited the story of his travels before the
council of Athens, AS years before the
birth of Christ. The reason for this is OBJ
vious from my point of view, which is that
the same causes which operated before the
time of Herodotus to drive them out of
their original lands continue to operate to-
day to keep them in the low, degraded
state they are now in.
Africa, more than any other continent,
has been subject to waves of migrating
peoples, who have been continually dispos-
sessing their predecessors. Many centuries
before the Asiatics came to lower Egypt
the ancestors of the pygmies must have oc-
cupied the delta of the Nile, possibly while
the cave men inhabited Britain and west
ern Europe.-Henry NJ Stanley in Serb
ner's.
Fire and Flood.
AT the Little Guinea Debating club not
long since the following question was up
for discussion: sob de two great clami-
ties, fire am flood, which am de mos CLAM
itoEs?"
The club debated the question at great
length and it was finally referred to Uncle
'Rastus for settlement.
II tell yo' what am de fac'," said Uncle
'Rastus frankly. "Yo' speakers done dis
combobberated me so dat cayn' tell which
am de bes' at argufyin', but / can tell
which am de mos c'lamitous c'lamity, an
de reason amt been teched on by de Gray
tors OBJ de ebenin'
'De fac am dis: De flood am de mos
c'lamitous, lease We can put de fire out by
pumpin' de flood onter it, but We cayn't
put de flood out by pumpin' de fire onto it
nohow!'-Exchange