Indian chieftain. [volume] (Vinita, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1882-1902, 1891-12-24
PASTE AND SCISSORS.

burg Dispatch.
Justice is made blind so that she
can't see what is going on in the court
room. Dallas NetcS.
Il has been discovered that music
comes out Of barrel organ In slaves.
49, Washington Star.
We tip the scales to learn our weight,
and tip the waiter to avoid walt
Binghdmton Republican.
Mine 10 patient wait. +" remarked
the young doctor. Rs he sat lonely in
his office. Baltimore american.
The world is more likely to speak
we'll OF man when he is dead than
when he is dead-broke. Puck.
He-"Are we going to have some
musicPn She-"No. Miss Van Howl
is going to siug."-M T. Herald.
The moon shines best when she is
full. II is not so with the leading
lights Of society. Orleans Picdy-
itHe.
When they say the brides costume
was dream do they mean TO imply
that it was an illusion3"-Boston Ga
I zette.
The flowers that bloom in the spring.
tra-la. have a good deal to do with the
| breach of promise case in the fall
[ Dallas Netgs.
Why should officials spend thousands
shooting dynamite balloons when any
ordinary teamster can draw reinP-
I Columbus Post.
Foreman (to editor)-"You'd better
/ look outi Old Jones Is red-hotm Ed
/ itor (calmly)-"Whcn did he dep
Atlanta Constitution.
A man never fully realizes how much
I of sponge he is until he slips down in
puddle of water aud mops it all up.
! i-RichmOHd Recorder.
I've got $4,000; want to build a
house, You can't do it, why
not?n "It takes $40. 900 to build a
house for $40, ,0OO Puck
A Western man says this is "tough
world" and it is his opinion that very
few who are in 1t now will ever get out
alive. pharmaceutical Era.
Deacon Smith-"What kind Of col
lection did we have to-day?" Parson
Brone-"A collection of misers,
should judge. ."-LO,oeH Citizen.
Heaven helps those that help them
selves, but praying for your daily bread
does not entitls you to the entire
bakery Indianapolis Journal.
It is so easy in the spring, when APP
I ple-trees are in blossom. for a man to
promise his friends all the apples they
want in the fall.-Atchison Globe.
Guest Cat Maine resort) What
/ lake is that?n Hotel Proprietor-"ry
been here only one season and can't
pronounce it yet."-M J. Weekly.
What was the trouble at young
Fits house this morning?" Fits was
trying to organize bread riot, so my
wife ."-IHdtanapolis Journal
Teacher-"What is the Island of
Java noted for?" Bright Boy (son OF
u grocer)-"It's noted for the coffee
that used to come from there. ~ GOOD
! NetUS.
Prin,us-"Did you read my play?n
/ Secundus Yes" Primus- Were
YOU struck with it?" Secundus-' Yes.
You ought to dramatize wallpapers
I Bdzar.
Talking about literary style. there
/ goes inau noted for his finished SEN
tences." "Indesd2 Is he a novelist?n
No; he is an ex-couvict. .n-BditiH0re
] AnericaH.
There are men who are such con-
[ frmed slaves TO the weed that they
/ would not euter the car of progress
unless it was a smoking ar.-BostoB
Transcript.
"Ahl II seemed that my remarks
were wholly uncalled for commented
the author when his essays came back
{ to him by way Of the dead-letter Office.
| indianapolis Journal.
A government employe expresses the
/ hope that the new rapid-iiring ma
/ chinery will not be brought into use
/ after any changes Of administration
that occur. - Washington Star.
Visitor-"Are you acquitted with
/ Scribber, VINO writes poetry3' Ed
itor-''I should sag knew him. had
to buy new waste basket last week
on his account. .'--Teras Syiings.
The leaves will be dropping soon, 4"
he said, with tiuge Of sadness in his
voice. Yes" she answered, they
rave to be up with the fall styles, you
knO@. - Washington Star
Winkle-"I wish could devise some
way OF hanging up my clothes Nodd
al wish ! could devise some way OF
getting them out after have hung
them up. Ciolhier and FurHisher.
Madison Squeer-"They say that
one-half Of the world doesn't know
how the other half lives Morrison
Essex-"The man who wrote tina;
never lived in small town.n-PUet.
First Little Boy-"And does your
sister play the banjoP' Second Little
Boy (proudly) Indeed she does; you
Just ought 20 hear her. She's grad.
uate OF Vassar she is."-GoOd NeC5.
II have seen all the large openings
Of the season." said Mrs. De. Style.
beg pardon, my dear" meekly said
her spouse; have you inspected my
bank account?'-BaltimOre american.
And ladies and gentlemen, roared
the temperance lecturer, what bai
filled more graves than whiskyP
; Doctors squaked a still. small voice
in the back part Of the halL-Detr0t
Free Press.
Plumduh HAS that charming
widow any property" Ketchum-
Yes considerable" Piumduh -
Real estate or personalP' Ketohun
-"Personal. She has six children. -
Boston Courier.
They practically sold me when the
entered into negotiations with an En-
glish lord old enough 70 be my father.
But you didn't marty him. and an,
not going toPn That's where they
sold LIE. "-Lye.
Dc Wilkens-"No. Miss Tompkins.
] am afraid you won't see much Of
| ma boo.uua ,rou zoe I am ~ 80 ~,