Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1891-02-07

II. Quad Olives IN Account a . Pleasant
etsamb0at Journey.

TRAVELLING WITH LIAR.
II. Quad Olives IN Account a q Pleasant
etsamboa& Tourney.
r NEVER COULD SEE any PARTICULAR
i enjoyment in making . long journey in
company with an upright, truthful man. Ifhs
has ever had any adventures hs won't exag-
gerate them, and you know that he WON'T try
70 pick your pocket, cheat you at cards or
challenge You to fight duel II you seem to
Be bored With his company. Therefore, when
I took steamer at Memphis for the run down
10 New Orleans and the captain offered 10 in
troduos me 10 Maj. Davis, the biggest liar in
the late southern confsdsrscy, vas heartily
rsjoiosd.
found the major 70 Be small. thin man
scarcely shaken hands when he pointed to the
Arkansas shore and said:
Fright over thar is where swan ashore
after the gun-boat battle above"
Then you were in that battls?'
DO you doubt my word, sab! II 80,
chief clerk OF the boat, who will consult with
''Oh, no, no, no, major! I don't question
your word in the least. 1t was hot fghtg'
1T was, sab. ! had command Of the fifteen
Fifteen? Why Admiral Porter's naval his
tory says there were only eight"
Porter, sah9 Nsvah heard Of Ports.. Here
10 my card, sah."
"0h, no, no, major! II you say there were
ably left out seven just to belittle the affair.
Go ON, major"
Il was on the Beauregard. We sunk three Of
your craft and then struck snag and went
down ourselves"
"But Porter says the Union ram Monarch
rammed the Beauregard and sent her to the
bottom" I protested:
''Sahl You will please call on Col Hicks r.
said the major, as he stifay arose and handed
me his card and moved away.
shade, and dropped the majors card over
board. He was absent about twenty minutes
and then returned wiping off his chin. As near
- could figure he had taken whisky.
''See that bluff over thar'?" pleasantly
queried the major as he sat down.
well, 1 had q battery Of ten guns thar for
several months, and it was my own eye which
sighted the gun that blew up the Yankee gun
boat Mound City. Sad affair that. but war is
war, you know. The shell which entered her
furnace and exploded resulted in the death Of
700 men,"
Lets see, major? If I remember Alright
the Mound City disaster occurred at st. Charles,
on the White river"
"Ana the shell exploded in her steam chest
"And the killed and injured numbered only
=. "sAa! You seem to doubt my word and
"Oh but don't, major! Let me beg of you
to believe that don't! was simply wonder
ing how Porter could make 80 many plumbers
in his history"
Porter, sah2 Never heard Of Mistah Porter
In my life. In the oommissary department, I
presume!"
I managed to change the subject after little,
and by and by the major went to sleep in his
chair, and got away from him until evening.
chair beside me and said
Ever meet Mistah Farragut Of your side?'
Admiral Farragut?"
''May have called himself such"
''No, never did
Sorry. He'd have probably told you about
the battle on the river above New Orleans"
Were you there9'
"That is, you we're there, Of course What
Commanded the confederate navy, Of co'se. ~
you did. Why, I thought Commodore John
Z. Mitchell commanded there"
"Look heah, sah-do you doub. my word ~
ooh! no, no, major! How can Il? You were
there, and wasn't. I have often read of the
ironclad Louisiana Of that feet"
She was my flag ship, sab. I steered her
while she rammed and sunk six Of Mistah Far
raguts vessels
Els it possible! Why, Porter says she did not
even IRE a gun, but drifted down the river and
"sah'l Porter, sab! Will your friend Mistah
Porter act for you in this emergency" de-
manded the major, as he jumped up.
"Sit down, major, please sit down! Porter
by sectional malice. Please give me the par
ticulars."
But he went away and did not see him again
until next morning. Then he came to me Just
as we were passing an island and said:
II had one Of the hottest fights Of the war
on that island 1 hao two regiments Of cav
airy under me, and we whipped a Yankee gun
boat fair and square and captured her.
Indeed! Well, you hustled around good
deal. You were u commodore, q commander,
''Sah, my friend, the chief clerk, is now in his
Office"
"But don't want to see him. Your word is
confederate ram Arkansas?
.rbuilt her, sah."
eyes, sah-built her and commanded her.
"Where was she built?'
up the White river, sah.'
"And where was her first fght?"
AT Baton mr. Rouge sah 1'unk three Yankee
why, that's curious. Porter says that the
Ark"
''SahI''
Porter says the Arkansas was built at Yazoo
City,
.'Sahr'
'And that her first fight occurred a. abe
came down that stream and continued on to
Vicksburg."
MY card. sab! MY friend, the chief clerk,
will act for me in this matter!'
Yes, know, but it's curious hog Porter
could be SO mistaken"
''Mistah Porter-Mistah Porter. Neyah
heard OF the person befo," sab. Army con-
tractor, probably"
HE says the Arkansas was commanded by
Lieut.. Brown, of the old navy"
"Ah! he does! Is your friend Mistah Porter
on this boat?''
''No."
win he meet rs at New Orleans7''
''No."
'Then, sab, I will again recommend YOU to
my friend, the chief clerk, who will be pleased
to arrange ell details. You have questioned my
veracity, sah!''
"Oh! No, no. no! How could IY''
4, See my friend, sab, and the sooner it's over
the betterr'
I went in and saw the chief clerk and told
him that had been challenged to fight Q duel
" .Rsa h him to go to srs''," he replied.
.'He wasn't Ave years old when the war broke
ont. Biggest liar in America Tho only thing