The Russellville Democrat., 1891-06-18

contry, II still live," which words was
spoken by Danyil Webster, who was
able man. Even the old-line wings Of
Boston admit that.
| Webster is ded now, howseyer, and his
mantle has probably fallen into the
hands of sum dealer in End hand close,
who can't sell it. Leastways nobody
pears to be goin round wearin it to any
| perticler extent, now days. The rigi-
mint of whom was turnel, fneriy con-
cluded they was bettsr adapted as Home
Cards, which accounts for your not
hearin OF me, ear this, where the bauls
| is the thickest and where the cannon
doth roar. But as American citizen
shall never cease to admire the mastery
advance our troops made ON Washin-
ton from Bull Run, a short time ago. 1t
was well dun. Ispoke to my wife bout
| it at the time. My wife sed it was well
| dun.
1t havin there4 bin determined to per-
tect Baldinsville at all hazzuds, and as
there was no apprehensions of any inn
mejit danger, I thought would go orr
onto pleasure tower. Accordingly
put on clean Billed Shirt and started
for Washinton. went there to see the
Prints Napoleon, and not to see the
place. which win here take occasion to
obsarve is about as uninterestin locali-
ty as there is. 1t is easy enough to see
why man goes to the poor house or the
penitentiary. It's becawz he can't help
1t. But why he should voluntarily go
and live in Washinton is intirely be-
yond my comprehension, and can't say
no fairer nor that.
Iput up to leadin hotel. I saw the
landlord and sed. elbow dye do,
Square?"
Fifty cents, sir" was his reply.
"Sir?"
"Half-a-dollar. We charge twenty-five
cents for lookin at the landlord, and fifty
cents for speakin to him. If you want
supper, a boy will show you to the dinin
room for twenty-five cents. Your room
bein in the tenth story, it win cost you
a dollar to be shown up there"
"How much do you ak for man
breathin in this equinomikal tarvunT
sed /.
TEN cents Breth," was his reply.
Washinton hotels are very reasonable
in their charges. IN. B.-This is Sar-
kassum.
sent up my keerd to the Prints, and
was immejitly ushered before him. He
received me kindly, and axed me to sit
down.
II hav cum to pay my respecks to
you, Mister Napoleon, hopin see you
hale and harty."
II am quite WELL" he sed. Air you
well, sirl"
Sound as cussr' answered.
He seemed to be pleased with my
ways, and we entered into conversation
to onct.
Flows Lewis?" axed. and he sed the
Emperor was WELL Eugeny was like
wise well, he sed. Then axed him was
Lewis good provider? did he cum
home arly mites? did he perfoom her bed
room at unreasonable hour with gin
and fanny? did he go to ''the Lodge" on
mites when there wasn't any Lodges did
he often hay to go down town to meet q
friend? did he hav a extensiy acquaint-
ance among poor young widders whose
husbands was in Californy? to all Of
which questions the Prints perlitely re-
plide, givin me to understan that the
Emperor was behavin well.
II AK these questions, my royal duke
and most noble Illness and imperials, be-
caws I'm anxious to know how he stands
as a man. know he's smart. He Is
cunnin, he is long heded, he is deep-he
is CRATE But onless he Ia good he'll
come down with crash one of these
days and the Bonyparts will be Bustid
up agin. Bet yer lifer
"Air you preacher, sir?" he inquired
Rlitely sarkastical.
mo, sir. But bleeve in morality. l
likewise bleeve in Meetin Houses. Show
me a place where there isn't any Meetin
Houses, and where preachers is never
seen, and I'll show you place where
old hats air stuffed into broken winders,
where the children air dirty and ragged,
where gates have no hinges, where the
women are slipshod, and where maps OF
the DEVILS wild land air painted upon
mems shirt bosums with tobacco joocel
That's what I'll show you. Let us con-
slider what the preachers do for us before
we aboose EN-"
He sed he didn't mean to aboose the
clergy. Not at all, and he was happy to
see that was interested in the Bonypart
family.
"It's CRATE family" sed l. But
they scooped the old man in"
"How, Sirs"
Napoleon the Grand. The Britishers
scooped him at Waterloo. He wanted
to do too much. and he did it! They
scooped him in at Waterloo, and be
snbsekently died at st. Helenyl There's
where the gratest military man this
world ever produced pegged out 1t was
rather hard to consine such man as
him TO St. Heleny, to spend his larst
days in catchin mackeril, and walkin up
and down the dreary beach in military
cloak drawn titely round him. (see pict-
er-books), but 30 it was. He'd of the |
Ar1nyf Them was his larst words 50 |
he had bin. He was grate Don't
wish we had pair OF his old boots TO |
command sum Of our Brigadesl"
This pleased Jerome, and he took me
warmly by the hand.
Alexander the Crate was punkins, > |
continnered. 'but Napoleon was punlin-
serl Aiic wept becaws there was 20 |
more worlds 10 scoop, and then took to
drinkin. He drowndid his sorrers In the
f1owin hoie, and the fIOwin bole was too
much for' him. Itginerallyis He under
took 10 give snake exhibition in hia
boots. but Il killed him That was
bud Joke On Alicf"
Since ynu air ~ aoliciions about
France aud the Emperor. rnay ask you
how your own conntry Is gesting along
sed jerome. " = pheasant voice y