The morning call., 1891-01-09
MEN ABOUT TOWN.
Odd Stories Cleaned From the
Byways of the City.
Bill Armour's journalistic valedictory-Not
According to Murray - Relin-
pushed the Spells.

Times have changed sadly" sighed the
venerable exchange editor as he paused for
a III oment to polish his spectacles. "a new
generation of newspaper men has grown
up, ana 1t does seem to me that they are
dl1erent from the old set Now, there was
oJu Bill Armour-you didn't know him. bat
ne was a good one in his day. Had started
III at lhe case, you see, and was a lightning
conlposltor In addition to being clever
writer, but like too many good men he
"ouiu drnk. A Particularly bright piece of
WORK on his part was likely to be followed
by spree. Well, Bill skipped out of Chi
cago one night, and a few weeks later he
popoed up down in Chester in the southern
poIlloh OF the State as the proprietor and
euitof OF weekly paper. Things went
aiohe smoothly Tor time, and Bill was on
.lie nish road TO prosperity, until an uufor-
tuhate accident befell him. An unus Tally
Drlght issue of his paper brought him the
CONCENTRATIONS of his friends, and Bill pro-
ceeueo al once 10 fill up. The result was a
week Oh drunken oblivion, from which he
aWoKe 10 ind that another publication day
hau rolled around without a single thing
having been done in The way of prepara-
tlon. The last weeks forms lay upon the
stohe' ana not line of copy had been writ
teh' dere was dilemma, but Bill was
equal to the occasion. Lifting column
from the front-page form he went to the
case, and in a few minutes the announce
ment mad been made in double-Ieaded type
that IN response to an almost unanimous re-
quest from his hundreds of delighted sub
scrlbeIs the editor had decided to reissue
the paper Of the preceding week.
Two weeks later Bill walked into Chi
eago sadder but " User man"
NOT ACCORDING TO MURRAY.
a card bearing the following printed in
scrIptlon is posted in a conspicuous place in
the sale Deposit Building ON Montgomery
street:
Persons viii please not handle these hose-it is
Iof hfe purposes only.
And yet they say that the school-master is
abroad in the land
RELINQUISHED THE sPoILs.
IL. III. Wade, the General Manager of the
Atchlson, Topeka and Santa Fe, who is now
III tIle city, was formerly with the Wabash
hailWay as Division Superintendent at
Moperly, Mo. Among the switchmen at that
pace was Al Hanklns, the original Patsy
bollVar, whose eScapades are well known
10 the old-umers among the railroad men.
IL appears that refIigerator-car loaded with
peer Strayed into the yard as an empty, and
1t took Hankins but a short time to dis
cover the mistake. The car was placed
on back track, and that night
the contents were quietly carted away
10 a saloon, HankinS receiving S175
as his share of the spoils. Securing
a leave OF absence he skipped out 10
hansas City, and proceeded to have a high
old tlme with the money. On his return to
Work pair OF new shoes was all he had to
snow Tor the entire amount spent. He found,
however, that during his absence the mis-
lake had been discovered, and an inveStiga-
tlun was being held to locate the less. He
was summoned by Superintendent W ade to
appear and tell what he knew.
Inc next morning boy carried a small
ana queerly shaped bundle TO the office, and
whtn the Superintendent opened it he
ionhd pair OF shoes, accompanied by the
following note:
Enclosed please find the car OF beer. Iamoff
Tor Texas. HAWKINS
ARMY PROMOTIONS.
An old army officer sat in a chair at the
Occidental last night and unused over the
uncertainty of life, and Of army life in par
ticular Strange as 1t may SEEM he said,
thouRhtfully, there are thousands and
thousands of people who fondly believe that
merit and seniority govern promotions in
the regular army. Now there is General
Miles, Tor instance, a Major-GeneTal close
up TO the top of the ladder, and away ahead
OF General John Gibbon in the race for pro-
motion; and yet if you Will search the re-
bellion records you will find that the latter
o5if;.ialded a division in Hancock corps
during the Wilderness campaign, and for
conspicuous merit was promoted to be
Major-General of Volunteers at General
Grants request Colonel Nelson A. Miles
commanded a brigade in the same corps,
and attracted little or mp attention. Since
the war, however, Miles has leaped upward
with great rapidity. Why? Well, he is
good soldier and was so fortunate as TO
marry a niece of Senator John Sherman.
The latter may have had something to do
with it-who knOws?'
A HIGH-PRICED BOOK.
The most valuable book in the city OF
San Francisco, or will be so when COM
pleted," said a prominent book-dealer
yesterday, :" is one in the possession of John
K. JaIboe, the attorney. II is an extended
edition of the history of the French Revolu-
ton, and on it has already been expended
nearly $4,000. Pretty steep price for a
single book, isn't it? Yet it will probably
cost much more before it is eompleted. The
stores OF Europe have been ransacked for
books for the mere sake of the illustrations,
which are taken out and added to the COL
ection to be embodied in this one work.
Thousands of engraviDgs many of them of
the most costly nature, are included in the
collection; but, not satisfied, he is still
searching and still adding to the list. When
completed it will be without rival. but if
placed upon the market would not bring
tenth Of its actual cost. 1t is merely an ex-
pensiye hobby"