Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1891-10-22
The Boston Drummer.

Among the passengers on Philadel-
phla train coming north the other day,
says NJ. Quad in the Evening World,
were several New York drummers.
One of the latter was coitish young
man, who prided himself on being
student of human nature. Where a
number of drummers are gathered to-
gether there you will hear Boosting and
Dragging, and each and every one will
put forward his particular speciality as
the best joke or trick of the season.
The young mans specially was by-and-
by duly explained. Said he:
"Gentlemen, | have little scheme
which l have named the John Henry
scheme. 1t is worked entirely on the
farmer, and it furnishes one with Won
deriul insight into the characteristics of
the horny handed sons of toll. Per-
haps you didn't know that the farmer
is naturally the most suspicious person
IN existence, albeit he is oftenest made
the victim of sharpers p
Two rthree Of the crowd doubted the
truth Of the assertion, which was just
what the cOltish young man desired,
and he continued:
81 propose to prove what have said.
| have made study of the farmer, and
l know him from head to heel. You
all see this watch? 1t is a bang-up
time piece and cost $3.50. If it had
Waterbury works, and a plated case
and was worth about S., | could sell it
to farmer for SIS as easy as rolling Oft
q log. AS it is straight goods, it would
scare a farmer to death to offer it to
him for $40"
81 think he'd snap it up" observed
ana of hn
''Thatshows you are not posted. There
is probably at least one farmer IN the
coach ahead. I'll just bet you an even
$40 that | will offer him this watch for
an X and he will take me for taklr
and refuse to invest"
After some hesitation the stakes were
put up, and, followed by two of the
party, the young man entered day
coach Almost the first passenger in
sight was q middle-aged farmer. lie
| had on an old straw hat, was without a
collar, and one of his cowhide boots
rested on the other seat as he inter
ested himself in newspaper.
"My friend,' began the young man.
as he smiled bland and seductive
smile, Il have met with misfortune,
and am obliged to-"
Il hain't got no money to give
away" interrupted the farmer.
- do not ask for charity continued
| the Young man. 81 have a fine watch
here which | promise to dispose of for
casht to relieve my temporary embarrass-
ment."
"Don't want no watch"
"But let me explain. Here is a
watch worth $3.50. | will sell it for $40.
Take itand look it over"
The farmer hesitated for while and
then took it, held it to his ear, shook 1t
| once or twice and said:
II don't claim to be the sharpest
man in this world, but l do hate to be
taken for a hayseed."
''No one takes you for a hayseed, my
dear fellow. | simply offer to sell you
my $3.50 watch for S1O.'
''Oh, that's it, Ell? Wall, [ guess | Il
take 1t !"
He dropped the watch into his poe
ket, tished up ten-dollar bill, and con-
tinued:
''Half the wheels may be gone when
I come TO examine it, but teller must
take some chances in this world"
Then the coltish young man turned
red and white and blue, and he smiled
and suffered and stammereC, and his
bland smiles faded away as he eX-
planned that it was all a joke. The
| other wouldn't have 1t that way, now
ever, and he finally closed the argu-
ment by splitting on his hands and ris-
ing up to fight the whole crowd. lie
kept the watch, and the young man
from Boston will have an armtul of sor-
row to hug for a year to come. He
doesn't know that one of the New
Workers, having heard of the trick and
expecting he would work it, had that
farmer posted half an hour III advance:
If he did it would break his young and
| rOnfGlng heart