The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-06-18

Well, you see In me a regler out-an'-out
hOld-fest Christian; not one of Them theo~
logins, but for more'n dozen years I've bin
church leader up in the Black River
country, an most of the time I've been a
deacon In purity good standin'.
Snow, wuzn't always that way. Time
wuz before jined the church when wuz a
use'ter say that could outcuss any other
man from Cohoes to Buffalo, an that's
sayin' good deal. Now, faint for me, a
Christian man, to boast of such a thing
now, but l kin say that could cuss along
with the next man. But wen l asked
Marthy-shes in the cabin now-to hitch
up with me she said that if | wanted her to
hitch up with me I'd have to give up cussin'
an jine the church. As / wanted her did
wat she said.
"Now, young man, a mancan't change him
self all to once. l meant TO give up cussin'
an did wat l could to. But it wus hard
work. l got along fust rate for few weeks
and then fust thing I'd strike a snag and
break loose. Then Martby she'd report me
to the church, an fust time l wuz up that
way they'd try mel 1 WIZ reported so often
that when I'd lay up an go home for the
winter the church ID be kept busy till spring
tryin' me an prayin' with me an kinder
straightenin' of me up. That went on for
more'n two years an must have been tried
more'n forty times, an wuz gettin' tired of
it. Then somethin' happened that changed
the whole business.
81 wuz sittin' jest about where am now
one night, thinkin' the whole thing over,
when along comes peddler an wants to
sell me a parrot. Well, I dickers with him,
an finally buys it for SIS. He wuz big
gray Teller, an seemed quiet. decent sort
of bird. used to let him out on deck on
sunny days, with string tied to his leg.
Well, it wuzn't long before somethin' hap
pened, an broke loose as usual When /
started tibet parrot looks at me. Then he
begins to ruffie up his feathers an swear.
Marthy she came runnin' up on deck to see
wat the row wuz, and she finds us at it
like two pirates. but that air parrot wuz q
beatin' me at every jump. He'd swear in
English and then he'd turn on some other
language. but there wuzn't no mistakin' his
meanin', anyway. | just give it up, an
when he saw was beat out he gave kind
of a satisfied croak an went to sleep.
"Marthy, she said he was the devil an
wanted to throw him overheard. But
wouldn't have it, for l wuz tryin' to think
| somethin' out. Well, young man, made a
study of that parrot. found if he heard
any one cuss he'd outcuss him. Ii you
poked him with stick he'd cuss; but IL you
let him alone he acted like church mem
Der. Then l got an idea. 1t strikes me,
Why not have this parrot do the cussin'
for you an thatfl keep your church standin'
all right? 'Twuz only that day that l had
| a chance to try this plan on. l got In a
| row at one of the locks an felt like cussin'
my best. But didn't. jest poked Jim
that was the parrot-with a stick an he
opened. Young man, he did some of the
/ prettiest cussin' l ever heard. He jest set
the men on the other boats crazy.
$50 that experiment wuz a success.
| There want any more need for me TO
swear. Jim could attend to that. In less'n
a week every one along the canal knew that
had parrot that could cuss the roof Off
| a court house. Then Marthy she goes an
reports me to the church fer bein' in league
with the devil-Jim bein' the devil. So first
| time gees home they puts me on trial an
| starts in to investigate me an Jim. That
air trial wuz as big thing up there as this
here DIR. Briggs case, an the meetin' house
wuz crowded that day. / took Jim with
me. Well, / wuz asked wat had TO say
about the charge agin me.
"'Ef you mean this here parrot SEE I,
he kin speak for himself an then l jabs
| Jim a little with a pin an he lets out. He
ontdone anythin' I'd ever heard him do.
| The minister nearly went into a fit an the
| sisters into Mysteries, an l wuz a bit scared
before Jim stopped. Then l wuz asked how
| l could purtend TO be a Christian an q
church member an keep a eussin' parrot
| like Jim on my boat. / knew / wuz in fer
| it then, but / jest thought I'd make sort
| Of fight for Jim's sake as well as my own,