The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-07-01
BRIGHT BITS.

AMATEUR ARTIST l should like to present the
last picture painted TO some charitable insti
tuition; now. which would you recommends
Cruel Lady t'riend-The Blind Asylum.-Life.
WHAT handsome plumbing you have. Your
pipes are plated, see. -
Il thought so at first; but Judging from the
way they work, should say they were solid
Puck. a4.t..-
srRLwBEe-I heard that you made an hours
speech at the debating club. Was it well re-
ceivedY
singerly-They cheered me when sat down.
Brooklyn Life.
'T see by a scientific paper" said the star
boarder, that butter Is very sustaining"
YES murmured Daggitt this ought TO
hold up twenty pound dumb bell''-NetD
York Telegram.
sHowMAN--Look here. Your bill says, Forty
nine days board for camel You've only had
Keeper That's all right; that camel has seven
stomachs. See?- P,tncl,
THE pEvII. is not a success declares Mis-
souri, revivalist We hope that this is true but
we trust that we shall not be regarded as pro
fame il we ask where in hell can his equal be
| found?-Net0 York Recorder
Mr.. ANN-There is one thing that like about
| your place over in New Jersey.
West Field-What is that?
| Dir. Ann-There is a train back every twenty
| minutes.-Nelo York Herald.
woot-wbat makes Mrs. Hicks watch her
| husband so closely?
Van Pelt-A few nights since she started to
| grieve for her first husband and Hicks sympa-
thized with her.-Nep York Herald.
| ANNE seeing George slip on a banana peel
| and slide under a fruit stand)-George doesn't
look so much like dude now, does heH'
appearance at the present moment.-Toledo
| Blade.
| CARAwAY-These new people are rich, but
from this invitation fancy they are from the
| west
Hooks-well?
Caraway- They have added D. O. to the R. S.
| V. P.-LJe.
''OH, HE is a model husband now. She doet
not even let him drink an occasional glass OF
| wine"
THAT is what 1 call downright mean. He
| never would have proposed to her had he moi
been under the influence of wine. '-IndianGp
| oils Journal
FATE seems to make things fit in nicely. Just
as wood was giving out coal was discovered
Just as whale oil was about exhausted petro
leum was found, and now just as we have about
given up hopes Of being angels Mr. Maxim as
sures us that his flying machine will soon be
ready Detroit Free Press.
DUDELE1GH- Nicely, old fellah. you lool
tiahd.
Nicely-Jove, old chappie. but I SHOULD
fawncy might Been working all the mawn
ing.
Dudeleigh- Working? Why. how, old fellah
Nicely-Ive been lahowing undah an i'm
preston - Session Courier.
WHAT do you expect to prove by all these wit
nesses,' sharply inquired the Judge
| I'VE expect, your honor, replied the attor
ney, ito impeach the testimony of the prosecut
ing witness
Whats the use" replied the Judge ''Didn~
he tell you he running big American tin
plate tory."-Chicu0o Tribune.
|
from the country)-Now. Adolphus 1 want yol
to take Endymion out for his afternoon walk
and, as you have not seen many of the sights O
London, you had better go along the Embark
ment and see Cleopatra's Needle. You know
is very old-so that Moses probably saw it wheI
he led the Israelites out of Egypt.
Page Boy with astonishment)-Lor' now
mum, to think that he should have come al
this way round -FunnV Folks.