New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1891-11-29
CHANCES HERE AND THERE.

in "The Pirates of Penzance' OF the very model OF
modern Major General >One can imagine LOT"
WslseIey TO be constant badhead at every perform
ance OF that exquisite satire on the British army Oh
to-day. very remarkable passage I'D thcse crueism'
Of Won Mokc gives Lord Wolscleys explanation OF his
oppostop. from military point Of vlew to the con-
fstructior OF the proposed Channel tunnel
between England and France. lie had said that such
q tunnel would enable the French TO descend uheA-
pectedly upon Great Britain in force. Won Molthe
had Suggested that tie French army as IL debouched
from the English terminus OF the tunnel could Dc
"killed with sticks" Lord WolSeley says he replica
that the entire French army could seize the English
mouth of the tunnel before the British army could be
moved to oppose II, whereupon Won Moltke assuming
that 10 be a fact agreed with wolseley. ie Lord
.olscley laws great stress upon the importance OF
the telegraph in the conduct OF modern wars; cM-
IDENTIFY forgetting that In the event OF threatened war
Hodncen England aud France ~ severance of tce-
graphic communication through the Turner's wires
might justaby be regarded as warning oil approach
ing forces
People abroad have very different ideas from ours OF
the use and value OF tunnels and railways and other
artificial means of REORGANIZATION secretary OF
State william II. Seward once remarked in CONVEX
sation That the adoption Of uniform gauge of rail-
WAYS I'm this country would do to restore and
cement the Union than would all the Reconstruction
legislation then pending or suggcstsu' anu :"
embodied the idea in more digniGed language, how
ever in one of the last of his state papers, in which he
urged not only uniform railway gauge but the brids
ing of the rivers Of the country at every point OF
vantage, and describing all means OF Intercourse
and commerce bonds OF the Union Az the OPEN
ing Of the St. Clair Tunnel recently Sir John Ross with
something as nearly akin to Sewards idea he could
venture TO express at n banquet where politics were
decried, alluded to the tunnel rs fav0nng "unre-
stricted reciprocity "a sign Of perpetual friend
ship, and added that commercial connections between
Iaad In
This was a modified form Of what Erasts wim nan
had said In his more mpnlsive way 10 cries Oh Np
and lord at that was not Kissed. In fact. the truth
Of what he said was too patent.
The experiments lately made in this country show
that we have rstclass article Of smokeless powder
invented by an American, and the secret OF the manu-
facturc OF which is in loyal Americans keeping.
II is probably not generally known that smoke
less powder for Germany to be used In ar
tiIlery and small in her next inevitable war,
is being now manufactured by an American well
known in New-York City. under another invention by
another American and by q totally dlHerehc PrVccs'
from that lately tried In this country.
Some people though not born humorsts were born to
cause humor under certain circumstances. 1t was at
the horse show that many people were pouring through
the entrance and crowd had blocked the space within
the building proper The hunters were performing ana
one horse who was acting unusually badly attracted
building so that they did not begin to look for their
seats but stood where they were to what the out
come of the struggle between horse and rider would
be- The odds seemed greatly In favor OF the hunter
until the rider, who probably knew very well with
What material he had to deal, cut his seed hafdozen
blows which were keen and rapid in succession
that the strokes cracked sharply all over the garden
and startled every one. AT that moment from the
crowd within the entrance came roar OF Indignation.
Of brtfa
YOU hitting that horse forl' But when people realized
who IL was that had opened his lungs in defence OF
the vicious BRUTE there was howl or laughter' LOT
IL was great broad shouldered. heavy policeman.
He was armed with the usual deadly club and no one
failed to catch the humor Of the situation where a
giant of a policeman ready at the slightest word to
crack with his stick the skull OF man onIeetea 10 tie
iashing Of an ill-tempered horse. And that's why
The crowd laughed and why few people In that part
of the building the hunter, now brought 10 his
senses take his next woGumps In beautiiul shape.
Every one knows how wonderfully successful police
men are at football game in obstructing the view OF
those people who are not high in the air. The prnc
pie of the thing Is this The newspaper men naturally
must be within the ropes that they may follow the
PLAYERS in their cyclonic course, and thus give an
accurate account Of the game in their papers several
score more or less, policemen are placed within the
ropes to see at the reporters unsuccessful as
possible in following the elevens and the buecoated
gentlemen outrunning many times the newspaper men,
place their expansive backs in such opportune places
that no one behind them see anything at oil except
the tips OF the goal posts Now the point OF this story
Is this Two policemen at the horse show had their
view OF the performing horses shut of by the horses
which were awaiting their turns. The policemen being
one side Of the fence at the edge OF the tan-bark
arena and the offenders being the other, there was
nobody to club so the policemen began to howl at
those within. Not the least bit OF notice given
to their protests until an attendant the
bark and asked what all the noise was about. ave
can't nothing" said OF them, and he added
some language thereto which is rarely seen in type
see.' The attendant went to deliver his message.
and coming back he leered through the fence. "H
ont HU the Street There's lots Of horses out there
and you can get good look at them.' Those police
men were simply dumbfoundcd. a good high fence
sometimes carries authority than blue uniforms
and brass buttons Fancy, a stable boy talking that
wav to two NewTOrk policemen out in the street.
You can hear a.skull crack at the very thought.
Some moro about The horse show since the subject
has gone Jar They very pretty girls and they
wore very pretty gowns, and their box was worth
second glance, good many people thought. They
may have known a good deal about some things. but
their knowledge OF horses could be represented only by
the cube root OF nearly nothing. One hunter could
not Tor would not jump over the seam OF oaken
floor, but the animal had good rider who did his
best under the circumstances. "Why, he doesn't
seem to be able to ride at ALL said OF the young
women-the prettiest one by the way. "Not a little
Bit said tho other. Shortly they changed their
mind, for Of them said, cappng her hands, "why
II the horses fault after all lie rides beautifully
doesn't he but his horse can't Jump Bit" (As her
words recalled she said, can't Jump FOR cent y
NOw In those two Young women should read this
column the writer humblv submits that there were
two hunters and two riders. and the first rider was
good horsenan. and his animal acted like q cur and
that the second animal was jewel of hunter, and
his mount clumsy. stupid fellow who should have
been anywhere IN the wide world ut that moment save
in the saddle So people go to horse show Just
as they 60 to the opera.
Some men get through the world so easily that the
wonder IS that they willing to stay in Il. The
field for their brilliant minds on this earth Is too
limited. man came ont from theatre the other
evening and stood on the sidewalk Number Of