davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27
Merchants Week.

This week promises to be a gay one in
this city. There will be thousands of
visitors. and if the weather is fine they will
have no occasion for any regrets. An elab-
crate programme has been arranged each
day for their entertainment. There will be
military displays, parades, races, excur-
sions TO Tybee and other things in the day
time, and at night the great Pompeiian
picture will afford amusement
And the people Of the city are prepared
to do all IN their power to make the week a
successful one. The effort should be, and
will be, to make Merchants week this year
surpass that Of last year.
The managers have incurred heavy ex-
pense, and they deserve to have their efforts
appreciated. They expect, aud will no
doubt get, all the encouragement to which
they are entitled, aud they are entitled to
a great deal. The whole city should Join
enthusiastically in making the occasion one
that our visitors will loag remember.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27
BRIGHT BITS.

ToM-Yes. she roped me into an engagement,
but have scheme for getting out of it.
Jack-WhatiS it?
Toni have to ask her father, and I'll fix
myself up as dude when go to do so.-Nei1
York Herald.
But, doctor, you said, you know that must
avoid all excitement"
Certainly, it hurts you. have always told
you So"
Why, then, did you send me your bill yester-
dayf'-h lteGeTlde Batter.
Mrs. NEUwED-C Charley, love, why was plain
gold ring adopted as a symbol of marriage?
Charley-Because, by the time fellow pays
all the expenses Incident to an average court
ship he is not able TO buy anything more elab-
orate.-Jel0eler'S Weekly, y
Tom KNox-I am glad to see that you hay
Joined our athletic club.
Howell Gibbon-Ah, ya-as, the doctah wecom-
mended exercise, 20 know; and as l heard that
walking was good, | just walk down evewy
mawning and wead the papahs Puck
''YoU SEEM to be having nice time of it
here, said the rate parent to the young man
whom he caught kissing his daughter in the
hall.
'Nice?" said the young man, smackinc his
lps, why, sir, that's no name for it!'--Neo
York. Press.
Mrs HOMILY (after church)-How did YOU
come to preach on backsliding, dearesty You
said at breakfast that you were going to preach
your sermon on profanity.
The Rev. DR.. Homily-I had intended to, my
dear; but my collar-button got down my neck
when was dressing for church. Puck.
Mrs. UPToDATE-The committee has decided
to stop sending clothing to the heather during
the summer. We are going to work in a new
field.
Mrs. Lovstogive-Indeed?
Mrs. Uptodate-Yes; we are going to send the
clothing to the seaside resorts.-Nelo York
Herald.
Ma. N1MRoD-I am going out hunting this
afternoon, and I'll bet l bring down some
thing.
Mrs. Nimrod-But the dog you shot last time
isn't well yet.
20, I'm not going to have any dog with me
this time"
No dog! For heavens sake. Henry,
what do you expect to shoot,"-Teras SIT
ings.
BROOKLYN is about TO let itself be appended
to New York-much to the ACKNOWLEDGMENT of
the latter. "Where,' asks the Boston Tran
script, will Chicago and Philadelphia be when
the consolidation goes into etfect?" Well we
cannot speak for Philadelphia, but Chicago
will be in Northern Illinois, on the shores OF
Lake Michigan. And it Will be, as now, one
compact homogeneous city-not a pair of
municipal twins with but one name between
them.-ChicGgo NeWS.
AFTER the bridal party partook of sump-
tuous banquet, younger brother of the
bride got up and said solemnly, raising his
glass
Ladies and gentlemen, I have to pro-
pose a toast, which, however, must be drunk
standing. Please take your glasses and stand
up
The guests, although somewhat bewildered
did So
Now" said the young scapegrace, 'if YOU
Will remain standing for few minutes I'll find
out who has been sitting on my new stovepipe
hat, '-IeTdS SiftingS.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27
Germany Is Very Gracious

Manifestations OF good will from the
young Emperor Of Germany toward the
United States are accommodating. Quite
recently he was making the most friendly
overtures to the American hog, and now he
has accorded to United States officer an
extraordinary privilege.
Berlin papers have lately been discussing
at length the very unusual fact that Lieut..
Powhatan H. Clarke, of the Tenth United
States Cavalry, has been detailed to serve
with Westphaian hussar regiment. As
this is the first instance wherein United
States officer has ever been permitted to
serve in a German regiment, the more fact
that he has been permitted to join the
hussars is in itself sufficient evidence Of the
kindly feeling Of the German government
for the United States
But an exceptional advantage was af-
forded Lieut.. Clarke by his relationship TO
the distinguished Gen. Won Versen of the
German army. 1t was through the friendly
intercession and good offices of Gen. Won
Versen that Lieut.. Clarke secured this
very unusual opportunity to learn by
actual service the practical cavalry work
Va WIG SOA hiou SOubSub IECIu bu6
war department was obtained readily
enough after the German minister of war
had given his consent TO the project
By serving with the Hussars the heuten-
ant expects to bring back with him many
new maneuvers that have not yet been in
PRODUCED into cavalry tactics in this coun-
try, as the German cavalry is popularity
supposed to be the finest military organiza-
ton of the kind in the world. Should Ger
many manage to come to active hostilities
with France. however, that would place
the lieutenant in an embarrassing position
1t would seem particularly ungracious, not
to say unfriendly, to retire, and yet the
| United States could not afford to have
even one of its officers fighting against our
! Oldest friend in aid Of foreign power.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27
The Song of the Bacillus.
Fron London Punch.

From London Punch.
Once fourished unmolested, now my troubles
never cease;
Man, investigating monster, will not let me rest
am ta'en fl ON friends and kindred, from my
newly welded bride,
And exposed-its really shameless-on a
microscopic slide.
Sure some philbacilc person a society should
start,
For protection of bacilli from the doctors bale
full art.
Koch the evil game first started, and his lyrnph
came squirming in,
But, 'twixt you and me- hAoiIh did not care a
single pin.
We went elsewhere DsrfAe body, and it onlv
made us roam,
But IT, hard. you must admit it, to be worried
from your home,
And methinks the hapless- patient had much
rather we had rest,
When he finds us wildly rushing up and down
his tortured breast.
Then came Berrheim and his lodges: his specific
is to flood
All the circulation freely with injections of
goats blood.
That is really rather soothing and it doesn't
Though they lacerate your feelings with an
automatic squirt:
Time will show if it's effective, but twin be re-
,. 4. Nehge most SWEEP
If the patients take to butting every single soul
they meet.
Next fierce Liebriech, quite a savage. has de-
clared that we shall die
Shatterd and exacerbated by the dreadful Span
ish fly.
We should like to ask the patient if he thinks
he'll live at ease,
With this system lmpregnated with that vile
cantharideS?
We perchance may fall before it, waging an I'M
equal strife,
But it's any odds the patient will be blstered
out of life.
Therefore, o my friends, take heart, and these
indignities endure,
Although every week brings news of an in
dJbitable cure;
We have lived and tiourished freely ever since
the world began,
And our lineage is as ancient surely as is that Of
man;
While I'll venture the prediction, as a wind-up
TO my song,
That despite these dreadful doctors, we may
haply live as long.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27
Eow TO Market Melnns-

! The watermelon growers IN this state are
already beginning TO discuss the question Of
how they can market their crops to the best
advantage. The shipping Of melons TO COM
mission merchants has not proved to be
wholly satisfactory. and the distribution of
the melons by an exchange has its defects.
It is an easy matter to grow melons, but it
is not so easy to market them at a reasona-
bic profit. A great difficulty is to avoid
overstocking any one Of the principal mar
kets, and thus reducing the market price
below the profit line.
Cannot the melon growers get hint
from the orange growers1 The orange
growers have never been so succ assful in
marketing their oranges as they have dur
ing the season that is about closing. They
tried shipping to commission merchants
and they tried the exchange and still they
didn't get such returns as they were en-
titled to expect.
Finally, they decided to try the plan Of
selling their oranges to buyers who visited
their orchards, and who relieved them of
all trouble connected with picking, pack
ing and distributing the oranges. And they
say that their returns have never before
been so satisfactory as they have this season.
Those who. buy the oranges on the trees
know how to handle the fruit, and Just
where the best prices are to be obtained for
them; and, being fruit merchants in the
large cities, they do not run the risk of
being fieeced by middlemen. The orange
growers think they have solved the problem
of marketing the product of their orchards,
and it is quite certain that they will not
return to the old methods of distribution.
}[hy cannot the melon growers have
their melons handled in the same way that
oranges are' 1t may be little difficult at
first to get those who handle the melons in
the markets to 60 to the melon fields aud
purchase the entire crop at SO much per
melon or so much per hundred or so much
per carload. but any difficulties that may
be encountered can be overcome,
doubtless, by the exercise of
reasonable amount of skill and persistence.
Once get the buyers TO go to the melon fields,
and the growers of melons will have little
trouble in marketing their melons at re-
munerative prices.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27
Italy Win Temper Her Indignation.

Italy VIII Temper Her Indignation.
Manifold practical reasons contribute tc
deter Italy from any sort of aggressive
demonstrations, or even offensive express
sions toward the United States. 1t is all
very well for the Italian premier to express
sympathy for our lack of the keen, patriotic
perception that would enable us to fully ap-
preciate Italy's fine frenzy of patriotic an
gulsb, but he would probably discover by a
conscientious analysis Of his palpitating emo
tons that his poignant sympathies are en-
listed chiefly for his own unhappy country
No one can blame him.
With the national finances tottering on
the verge Of collapse and threatening utter
ruin his country certainly cannot be con-
sidered in any suitable condition to engage
in an expensive war with a powerful nation
of almost unlimited resources. Such a thing
is simply beyond the pnle of rational posi-
bility.
As for the alleged threat to withdraw
from all diplomatic relations with the
United States, that is simply absurd. While
so foolish a course virtually would not
effect us any more than the departure OF a
NASBuobSu pSduub NSLueTt III WOulu Dc q
severe loss to Italy from commercial
standpoint.
Beside, Italy is literally overrun by a
half-starved population that is becoming
murderously desperate from sheer lack of
proper food and reasonable chance to
make a living. These people have been
shipped to America in hordes for years.
They are certainly not particularly de-
sirable acquisition to our population. But
we are rather inclined TO be charitable in
such affairs. With decent chance to make
living they frequently turn out very good
citizens And the room that their departure
makes in those packed districts at home is
undeniably great relief to Italy.
Any one who may think that Italy will
rashly abandon all of these advantages
through mere impetuosity is greatly mis-
taken. Italians have too sharp an eye to
the main chance.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27
Thrifty Theories Of Theology.

Western ministers of the gospel are some
what agitated and interested by the recent
strike, so to speak, in the Iowa presbytery
caused by the introduction of theological
students into pulpits which the veterans say
the various congregations would have to
employ graduated journeymen expouuders
to fill if it were not for those enthusiastic
aspirants who volunteer their services
gratuitously just for the practice they may
thus acquire. Possibly the students get all
their services are really worth. But such a
suggestion would be very unkind. More
over, it is not the point.
Heretofore the impression has commonly
prevailed among the laity that the good
men of the gospel held the dissemination of
the Holy Scriptures as the highest aim an d
sole purpose Of the sacred calling to which
they had consecrated their lives simply for
the sake of the good they could do man
kind.
Apparently that is an egregious error.
These gentlemen place the ministry upon
the ordinary plane Of a mere profession for
the purpose of making living. Not only
that, but the members of the craft clearly
have thrifty notions about the essentials of
success, and deem it necessary to keep a
close watch upon cut rate competition. In
fact, they appear more than usually i'm
patient Of any sort Of invasion of their
province, which has hitherto been con-
sidered an open field in which all corners
were heartily welcome.
All that is now changed Theory has
been Transmitted into practice of the most
practical sort. Cold calculation would not
incorrectly describe it. But is that likely
to advance the cause of religiona That is
the grave question which now presents 1t
self. Are men trained in SO thrifty a school
of crafty calculation upon pecuniary gain
more likely to diffuse pure Christianity
than the old school of simple teaching of
the gospel for the benefits it was supposed to
confer upon their felIows' Really it does
not seem reasonable.
Those veterans of the text and bcnediction
preachers than that they should keep quiet
and let their hair grow, so to speak. In other
words they should "go to Jericho and wait
until their boards grow.n How a great
growth Of whiskers would increase their
piety or augment their talents is not stated
Meanwhile those young men are presumably
to allow their religious fervor to gradually
cool and their enthusiasm slowly ooze out
of them from inaction while they waste the
best years of youthful vigor in awaiting
their turn at the evangelical till
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27

The MORNING NEWS is on file at the following
places, where Advertising Rates and other in
formation regarding the paper can be obtained
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The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27
A Complete Apology.

A prominent official at Tabreez. IN the course
Of an alteration with an English gentleman,
says Persia and the Persians, called his adver.
sary liar. The result was a challenge, which
seemed TO the Persian p-eposUerous
Il fight said he. 'What shall fight for
only called him a liar"
We'll" said the gentleman who took the note
70 him, he says you will have TO fight him;
there is no way Of getting out Of h Il viii
never do TO call an English gentleman a liar, :"
But, say won't fight replied the other
Then you must apologize
Apologize! What does he mean by apologiz-
ingT'
Why, take 1t all back. and say that you are
sorry that you called him a liar. That is what
it means
is that all,' replied the Persian. ''Of course
I'll apologize I'll say whatever he wishes me
70 say. lied when called him liar am a
mar, the son OF liar, and the grandson Of liars
What more does he want me saw"
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27

Oklahoma judicially declares that women
are eligible to ho.d office in that territory
OF late years the territories have shown a
much more liberal and progressive spirit in
this respect than the old established states.
Possibly 1t is because the territories have
no long established precedents and deep
rooted prejudices to sustain. Or it may be
because they have not so many women
and don't mind humoring their whims. At
all events the manifold Increased opportu-
mites there render appropriate the para
phrased injunction, "Go west, young
woman, and get elected to Office. Not par
ticularly because we wish to be rid OF you
but-go west ~
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27
NDEX TO NEW ADVERTISEMENTS.

MEETINes-Clinton Lodge No. 81. F. and A.
u
SPECIAL NOTES.-THE 12d Anniversary Of the
Independent Order of Odd Fellows, Monday
Evening, April q; Refreshments to be Served
BY Ladies Of Independent Presbyterian Church;
Heidt's Special Prices; Notice to Water Takers
suggestions for To-day at Reily's.
RAILROAD SCHEDULES Central Railroad Of
Georgia; Savannah, Florida and Western Rail-
way; Charleston aud Savannah Railroad; Tybee
Schedule Central Railroad of Georgia
STEAMSHIP SCHEDULES - Ocean Steamship
Company; Baltimore Steamship Company
ExCURsIoNs-A Sail Out on Old Ocean to Sea
souy per Steamer Eliza Hancox.
WHO ARE THEY?-Lindsay & Morgan.
DIsMAy AT The Famous"
CHEAP COLUMN ADyERTIsEMENrs-HelpW Want
d; Employment Wantsd; For Rent; For Sale;
sost; Personal. Miscellaneous.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27
Is the President 1Rnorant2

When President Harrison passed through
Tennessee he went somewhat out Of his way
at several points to pay his respects aud
make friendly overtures 70 the confederate
soldiers. In doing so he betrayed rather
surprising degree Of ignorance as 20 the
present status OF the confederate veterans
before the law. At memphis Mr. Harrison
said: 81 beg to assure you that l carry
from the great war no sentiment Of ill-will
to any. l am glad that the confederate
soldier. confessing that defeat which has
brought him blessings that would have been
impossible otherwise, has been taken again
into full participation in the administration
of the government; that 40 penalties, limi-
tations, or other infections rest upon him. 1
have taken, and can always take, the hand
Of a brave confederate soldier with conf
dence and respect"
As TO his sentiments the President may be
perfectly correct but he is certainly
greatly at fault so far as mis- facts are con-
cerned. Although the civil war closed more
than twenty-five years ago the men who
fought on the unsuccessful side are yet alb
solutelY inhibited from manifestIng their
loyalty to their reunited country by the
most offensive and CALLING enactment that
has ever been inflicted upon them. Under
the law they are positively prohibited from
joining the United States army. The law is
as follows: No person who has served in
any capacity in the military, naval, or civil
service of the so-called confederate states,
or of either of the states in instruction
during the late civil war, shall be appointed
to any position in the army of the United
States
1t appears somewhat strange that the
commander-in-chief OF the army should not
be acquainted with the laws governing his
own immediate department. Since we
should not like to suspect the President of
the United States of deliberate hypoc-
risy charity compels US to attribute his
statements to ignorance.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27
Struggling Up Life's Rugged B,n

With youth, vigor, ambition and an indomitabIe
Will to help us, is no such grievous matter.
but tottering down again, afflicted by the all.
ments which oeset old age--our backs bent with
lumbago, our elastic muscles and Joints stir .,5
painful, is woeful piece Of business, For the
lntrmite3 which the decline of life too oftan
brings, Hostetter's Stomach Btters is a benef.
cent source or relief, mitigating solace al
ways to be depended upon. No regulating tonic
evolved by botanic medical discovery is So we'll
calculated, so thoroughly able. but -witbomt
undue stimulative effect, to help the aged. the
delicate and the convalescent-to res1scitata
the vitality OF frame which time and physical
decline have impaired as this. Kidney and
bladder weakness and disorder, costiveness
man complaints. dyspepsia and rheuma
I'D. '0AN OlneS'
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27

Opelousas is a Louisiana town that is not
half rs well pleased with the administration
as those towns in which Harrison has been
received appear to be. Opelousas is fighting
As hard as it knows how against an obnox-
ous negro postmaster that the administra-
lion threatens to foist upon it. While good
Brother Wanamaker goes junketting
through the land preaching good will his
Iubordinates at Washington are doing their
almost to affront the people OF certain local
ties by thrusting upon them servants whom
hey must furnish the money TO pay, but
VIC are in every way repuguant TO them.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27
Reqtstered at a. Postoflce On savannah.


The MoRNING NEWS is published every day in
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DAYS aud Saturdays, three months, 81 Is; SIX
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Subscriptions payable in advance. Remit by
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Letters and kilograms should be addressed
r&oBtTING NEWS" Savannah, Ga.
transient advertisements other than special
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The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27
oUR NEW YoRK OFFICE.

Mr.. ]. J. FLYNN, General Advertising Agent
If the MORNING NEWS, office % Park Row,
New York. All advertising business outside of
the state of Georgia, Florida and South Caro-
Una will be managed by him.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27
Rustling for Harmony.

From the Cincinnati Comm ercial CRepN
The New York legislature is considering bill
to compel all owners of dogs and cats to keen
them confined at night. The success of the
measure has the prayers of thousands OF people
Of nocturnal restlessness.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27

Down in the capital of the Montezumas
illinois joe Cannon is regarded as too big a
;un to be fred. They don't understand
rigorous western English down there.
Therefore they cannot fully appreciate his
itrong points.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27
Don't Persuade Ben to Dese-t

From the Louisville Courier-Journdl CDern.l
President Harrison's admission that we must
trade with other nations makes him appear
very much like disguised democrat 1t is TO
be hoped that Benjamin does not really coute m
p ate the betrayal Of the men who furnish tho
republican campaign fund.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-27

Mexican lottery people find that the
United States lottery law gives them almost
IS much trouble as it does the Louisiana lot
cry. When they venture into Texas they
IRE promptly arrested.