New-York tribune., 1891-04-30
THE TALK OF THE DAP.

THE TALK OF The DAY.
In It's expanaro OF the sunday-school Bible lesson
on the book of JONAH The Baptist Teacher" took the
following extraordinary position "n 1t had pleased
God so 10 order it would been entirely possible
even for an oyster to swallow Jonahquite as easy as
for Jonah 10 have swallowed an oyster" upon WHICH
The Congregationalist' thus comments: II IL haa
pleased God so to order, IL would have been ehuIey
possible for Him to have made an oyster Sunday
school teacher; and it would hardly have been moro
remarkable than that one who could write such nom
sense as the comment quoted should be chosen for
that place But the oyster II allowed to follow hs
natural instincts, would have kept his mouth Closed
An American woman, an artist, who was lately mar
red in Italy TO an Italian Radical: VINO VINO Is asP ster
ali, did not have to be married III Catnohc oHu1, It'll
b,vs mot SseS Ss a @ Hv ny am and nG @s
Presbyterians, but perhaps they dd not nave me
@ m for we %sTe out o% a sf was When the
prost who thought that he had the responsibility OF
came to see me about it, he begged 70 tell him
what words were said over me when was baptized
1sd ae ne n he feared that he could not be tie
one to perform the ceremony Imagine t ' what he ne
baptized at all managed 70 keep my face straight
when he talked Of the rosewsteT for II generally Ta,
supposed here that American Protestants 0apuze their
children In e-water. "-(BOston Transcript
Next fall gentleman ffty-three years of age will
enter the class Of '04 OF Princeton CoIcge' during
the Civil War he sophomore in that institution
but left il to fight for his country AS INC CONSIDERS
that the late unpleasantness is about settled nO"' he
intends to return and finish his college course We
hope that lie will fraernlZe WIFI Iie OIe' O'S' anu
have all the fun there Is.
"I desire to insert this small advertisement In your
paper to morning" she satn ,-, 4. .
This said the advertising clerk, looking II over
! "w 90 among the wants"
Have you no wish column
| tba lad rOm Boston,
! haughtily, lyon need not insert IT, ! simply Wish
situation as govc,ncss. That is all. 1t IS not case
Of went. Is there any newspaper printed IN EhshSn
| In this place ?'-(Chicago Tribune
Can it be possible as "The Boston Transcript de
carcs that cultured business man Of tlsat city pro
claims the following his motto:
! Worth makes the man,
| The want Of IL the chump
lie who would succeed m life
Must get on move ana numpt
| An extended ana nattering notice OF The
Tribune apropos OF rs recent celebration was reprinted
| I'm ouc columns last week. impro pery credited 70
| 4. The Paper World Of NewYOrk, whereas II was
taken from the pages Of that admirable trade journal,
" The Paper World . of Springfield, Mass i such a
slip Of the pen be excusabic this could ony be
when a newspaper is embarrassed by the number ana
heartness Of such courteses as have recently been
extended TO The Tribune by the press in general
The most autocratlc hotekeeper in the world is in
0Tapf GoTs sD cGGny S said to Tas @e e BACK before
O'clock "Whyi' I asked. Because l 60 To- bed
at that % and s0n me- are Sy PER s
t st1p in such a hotel' "Oh, no! you won't, won't
ote in s her ee town no other stable other
store You can't buck agin ne h9n re oaen ona co
e cnd,d TI r lad better stay sat down and he
around and aably questioned me- L2oS o,t DeTTs sort
70 he bothered with you So keep your questions TO
YOURSELF I've half mind 10 zen you s y, " Ton,.
Can't speak TO man in my own house !"-St' hon'
Globe Democrat.
An American girl in Paris writing to friend
in This country says We generally managed to make
our French understood enough to order what we waVu
But the rub came when papa wanted some mus'iu'
We asked for it IN French, Italian and Spanish ou'
all to no purpose, till mamma Said' 'MuS'aru' Sou
IDIOT " ....
"sOh mustard, said the waiter IN utter cohUeinp''
why didn't you say before"
In Paris one day papa noticed man stop man
who was walking front of him and address MN III
French He evidently asking quesuoh III
regard TO his watch, which he held In his hahu'
But the other failed 10 understand him. anu he iei.
him much ANNOYED, and turning 10 papa. repeated
the request in French still pointing to his watch
popa shook his head and said, 4 speak English only
.1Oh do youp said the stranger, why, SO DO l.
am from Louisiana"
A Wolf and a Lamb were drinking out OF the Same
purliug stream when the Wolf angrtly burted out:
Il say YOU! You are Rolling the Mud an up, .,,
Let her roll" returned the Lamb nonchaldntly;
Whercrpon the Wolf Leaped across the stream ana
tplI rDon the Lamb. The Fierce Creature had naruB
acmpted To Tear the Lambs Shoulder however, DeiOFe
HE Teeth broke Off Short and fell to the Ground.
nah ~ said the Lamb; what Fool you are TO try
vour Pa Fangs on a Hardened old Tough like myself
| Can't YOU See that spring Lamb !-tPucK'
Boston papers report that the Massachusetts Church
I'non a High Church organization with cierlca
and Law membership Of 1G2, has adopted the Kew
Dr. satteree Of this city, its candidate for DlShop
of the Episcopal diocese Of Massachusetts,. ms
practically narrows the contest down to Dr. saterlee
and Phillips Brooks 1t is not at all certain however,
that Dr. satterlce would accept. Somewhat over
wear ago ne was elected bishop Of Michigan ana de'
clined on the ground that it was his duty to remain
with his parish which is one of the most important In
the city.
They are telling story out in Wicmta AZ haI mn%tes 1t
woman who kept line OF voters waiting hve ihhue h
until she found her ballot, which she au put III IA G
pocket Then she tried TO vote recipe ior "a ~ He-
pickles and rot mad with the warden wheh I've vou NC .st
Il wasn't a ballot. Thereupon she said On III.
how stupid and found her ballot and v0ted lhe ~ IN
man fhere is something inrnscaiy imRIOpaOn, ,ot -
the story OF II woman putting her ballot IN her ~ ~.
Every woman who considers herself lady goes 70 ~
n DOlls in Kansas with her ballot IN her portenV,'
| which she carries in her hand.-(Boston IrahsoriP"