The Bolivar bulletin. (Bolivar, Tenn.) 1888-1946, 1891-09-18
A Sample of our Legislature.

lie was newly arrived Legislator.
You could have surmlsed as much from,
the length Of his beard, the tangled and
hayseedish appearance of his hair, and
from the innocent and altogether inuoc-
uously guileless expression of his face.
As you saw him walk, with a digniied
tread, through the lobby of the Maxwell
House, you could see, also, in imagination
an old farmhouse on creek bottom farm
away up in "Hurry" County; the Squire
going 10 the barn saddIing the old gray
mare. and riding off to "town" where all
the different Alliances in the county are
havin ne meeting to unite on candidate
for the Legislature; the Squire iss chosen
their candidate he Ia nominated and elec-
ted and here he Ia. He has gone through
the regular session without accomplish
ing much, save the passage of one or two
measures of interest only to his imme-
date constituents. Things have changed
little since then. But the Squire Is am
bilious now. lie would like to have a
beard long ever unto that of the great
prophet, Mcdowell by whom q handful
of his people swear, and whose name even
is a password in the subordinate Ali
anees; he would even desire to edit great
paper like the Toiler, which is not the
friend of the toiler, neither is il of the
spinner.
When the squire left his home with the
determination of Wrestling the State gov
eminent from the corporations, he packed
his belongings" i'm his old leather trunk
and boarded the good steamboat g"
which in due course of time, landed at
the port of Nashville. The Squire, used
10 helping himself, lifted the trunk uron
his shoulder, walked off the boat, and af-
ter laborious struggle for foOthold
among the rocks on the wharf, finally
reached the lamp.post at the corner OF
Front and Broad, put his trunk down,
and after drawing several long breaths,
inquired of an old steamboatman: "Say,
Mister, kin ye tell me whar the Legisla-
ture boards her hands?"
As the Squire strobe through the corri-
dors, meditativeIy pulling his whiskers,
he met one of his constituents who had
come to town to zee the sights, and had
stumbled on the Legislature as the first
curiosity.
"Hello, Sqire, how's you and the Lig-
isiatur gittin' 'longf
I'm, eOrter $3.50.
@Passed tina. bill putin my land in
t'other county,"
"Interjuced it and passed on first
readin'."
SHOW many more readin's it got to
pass?"
1.-TWO more"
"When win you get it passed tother
two?"
"Bill," said the squire solemnly. as he
took hitch on his trousers and another
pull at his whiskers, 81 don't think I'm
a howlin success as a Legislator. i don't
seem to ketch on, or else they are all agin
me. Durin' the reg'lar session / could
sildom git bill writ out as would suit
me. When got one fixed and inter-
juced it, they'd pass it first readin' refer
1t TO some committee, and thatd be the
last ever hearn of it. The bill / writ
out to change the county line to make
her run with Lickskillet Creek, SOS ter
put Squire Perkins out o. the county,
never got away from the committee on
County Lines, and it's as dead as tr door
nail.
"I interiuced a bill 'lowin, County
Courts to lend money on pumpkings and
pertatoes, but it hez died er unnatural
death, and the bill to make stealth of wa
termllyons felony is goin' the same way.
Bill don't never want ter come here no
more. I amt success. Pll give an &C.
count of my stewardship to Shakerag IN
ion when go home with fear an trem-
blin. IN ashville Herald.