Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1891-05-26
A DEMOCRATIC MoRSEL

The Democracy have found another
sweet morsel in the formation of the
Peoples party, and, as usual, they are
rolling it under their tongues and ex-
tracing all the saccharine matter
which it contains.
They have sounded their timbrels,
sung Poems Of delight, for in the birth
Of the child they seem to see that the
inheritance Of the Republicans will be
divided.
The new party is hungering after
the good things of the earth, and IT
knows full well that there is nothing in
the Democratic cuisine to tempt it.
1t is a typical mother Hubbard larder,
with only the very bare bones Of a
nouldering party TO invite attention.
For this principal reason do the Dem
ocratic brethren rise up, and il they
do not exactly call the child blessed,
they praise IL for its healthy appear
ance and its lusty lungs, and fondly
predict that IL will be at least the peb-
bic with which the Democratic David
win smite the Republican Goliath.
They see, or profess TO see, in the in
FAINT prodigy that will wax gross and
kick violently, and each individual
kick will have for its sole end and aim
the party which they so much dread.
The birth OF the Peoples party is,
to them, an oasis in the barren desert
OF Democracy, as the sight OF a ship
TO shipwrecked mariner, bringing
hope TO the hopeless, to the dying life.
They felicitate themselves upon the
great good fortune which chance has
sent them. They grid up their Ioins,
and say TO each other: "There is balm
still in Gilead. There is a physician
there and the health OF our people will
soon be recovered"
They see in it very large bundle of
sticks, which, in good Democratic
hands, will fagellate the bare back Of
the Republican party, with never so
much as a blister left upon their
hands, at once so soft and yet so firm
and clean.
The mountain labored, and parturi-
tion was not particularly paiuful; the
midwife showed the infant to the
leaders Of Democracy, and they began
at once TO cast about for a calling for
the child. Phlebotomy, although now
almost lost art, was decided upon as
the profession TO which the youngster
should be trained, and these men,
wise in their generation, had already
a subject upon which the student
could practice. The young phleboto-
mist could try his prentice hand upon
the good body OF the Republican
party. Constant blood-letting would
weaken IL, and II the fates were kind,
application, the great secret of
successful life of man or party would
accomplish the rest.
Hence there is JOY, not in Heaven,
but In the Halls of Democracy: not
over one Republican whom they have
gathered In, but over an intangible
something sent before its time into
this breathing world scarce half
made up"
This Democratic jubilation is in ex-
tremely bad taste; 1t is also prema-
ture, inasmuch as the sucking has not
as yet shown any special prediction
FOR the party that would fain hug IL
TO its bosom, and force coagulated
Democracy between its unwilling lips.
But Democracy has a record to
maintain; a mission as yet unfulfilled.
The days OF Its qualification are not
yet over, and not until 1t crosses that
extreme limit will its perturbed spirit
rest. A party that is ever halloing
before II is out OF the woods; that
crosses bridge before 1t comes to IL;
that does not wait until it comes to