The L'Anse sentinel. (L'Anse, L.S., Mich.) 18??-current, 1891-08-29
THE LEMON TRICK.

Some men are born villains. some
men achieve vlllainy, others have vii.
lf.iny thrust upon them. / belong te
the last category"
He didn't seem the least like a vii.
lain. he was stout; villains are sup.
posed to nave lean and hungry look.
And at that moment Bobby. his young
est little boy. presented him with g
sticky pear-drop, which he ate. Who
ever heard OF q villain eating pear
dropsp We were next-door neighbors;
we were both fond OF gardening, and
there was good deal of innocent
rivalry between us. He was some
thing in the city; 80 was i; we always
went to town by the same train. gen.
orally in the same carriage and we
were both first-class season-ticket hold
ers--that In itself was guaranty OF
responsibility. Still. he said he was q
villain.
"Yesp he said; II obtained my wife
by piece OF designing villainy. ]
should like to tell you about it."
was sitting in this villains garden.
on this villains garden-seat. smoking
one OF this villains cigars (Which
wasn't at all villainous). and Bobby.
aged three, hal retired. We were
alone, and / was in for 1t. l crossed
my arms upon my chest as / have
seen persons do in my position upon
the stage go on" / said with o
melancholy smile; your story inter-
ests me much"
You are probably aware that my
wife. Carlotta, is the daughter of an
eminent fautist,"
Yes" he continued, my father-in-
law was the celebrated Trcmolo. /
met my present wife at little dance
in the suburbs. fell violently in love
with her, and wasn't bit awed when
l was told that she was the daughter
OF Tremolo, the tlautist. I've got u
decent business, said. Twas earning
six hundred pounds Il year at that
time my dear fellow, and l had saved
little money. Why on earth shouldn't
l marry Tremolo's dahghterp Ididn't
know that was Philistine, you see?
Signor Tremolo divided the world into
two classes-professional people and
Philistines. Now the lady at whose
house had met my Carlotta, though
she knew Miss Tremolo well enough to
ask her to her little dance. was either
unwilling or unable to give me % formal
introduction to the young lady's papa;
but was not to be baked. I'll take
lessons, said to myself. and get to
know him that way So bought a
flute, and knocked boldly at Signor
Tremolo's door and demanded an audi
ence. He was awfully civil, and he
was greatly astonished when | told him
that wanted to have some lessons
Z" i shall be delighted, young gen.
tleman.' he said; how many years
have you been working at the iastru-
mentp'
q TO tell the truth, Signor Ticmo-
To- ! answered airily. learning the
flute is just little within OF mine. /
only tried once and then l couldn't
get 1t to make II noise
Never in my life had seen man
get into such an awful rage all at
once. Signor Tremolo sprang 10 his
feet and turned purple. Wretch,
brute, animal, Philistine, dog, beast
toad-pigr he shrieked, and thea he
clutched at his collar as though he
were going to have a fit And you
come to me-to me. Tremolo!--tO
teach you the rudiments! Get out OF
my place, you insolent rascalp
| II thought IL best to make n clean
breast Of the whole matter ut once.
'Signor Tremolo,' said, i beg that
you will excuse me. love your
daughter to distractions; the LESSONS
that asked you to give me were q
mere pretext.' But that only made
him worse.
:" .Philistine!' he cried in an awful
voice, as he flung the door wide open
'gor He wouldn't even give me time
to tell him about my six hundred Q
year.
For three months was perfectly
miserable; had no opportunity Of
meeting Carlotta Tremolo. and how on
earth was Ito get over her fathers in
superable objectionp How was I to
cease to be Philistinep 1t is difficult
TO become professional after you are
eight-and-twenty; and could not
very well black my face and turn ne.
gro minstrel.
II am rather fond Of dry reading; !
like book which Ia. so TO say, capiarc
to the general. was reading 'Wugs-
by's Physiology one day--the section
on mental impressions. This was what
l read: The mere mention Of favor.
ite article Of food will often make the
mouth witch involuntarily. This pc.
culiar phenomenon is often observed
In an exaggerated degree at the sight
Of very acid fruit--as the lemon.
These obscure phenomena, etc. Toe
ldea-the fiendish idea-came to me
In an instant; / became designing vii.
lain in the twinkling Of an eye. i will
become an evil genius to Signor Ire
molo.' / thought; 4 will become tt
him as the Old Man Of the Sea. Nc
more shall he delight the public. Wher
see his name billed for concert il