The Austin weekly statesman. (Austin, Tex.) 1883-1898, 1891-07-30
TWO STRANGE LOOKING
OBJECTS AND WHERE
THEY BLEW IN FROM.
Narrow Escape of Two Prominent Hous.
tOnians From Being Devoured Alive
BY Marauding Brindle Cow
With IA Taste for Greens.

Late yesterday afternoon two strane
looking objects appeared on Congress
avenue. They were astride of bicyces
and evidently alive, but were so I'M
canny in appearance, so outlandish in
attire that the electric car manifested
disposition to run away, and Chief
Lucy blew his whistle and appealed to
Major Burbanks of artillery, to stand
by him with his battery i'm case
of need. The Mexican tamale
man on the corner fell
on his knees and crossed himself
and the summer girl uttered a tiInid
shrek, and chung with a death grip to
the manly arm Of the nearest commi,o
stoned officer with curl paper mus
tachios. An old negro got out his
hoodoo bag and began muttering an
incarnation and the crowd stood in
that silent awe which follows a homi-
eide. Finally Officer Cato mustered
up courage to tackle the two specters
and pulled them into neighboring
cafe for inspection just as the band
struck up Johnny Get Your Gun"
and the Houston Light Guard began
to form a hollow square. 1t was
soon learned that the strange objects
were none other than j. l.. Watson,
chief conspirator of the Houston Post,
and Fred Dumble of the Talmagian
whiskers. A rigid cross-examination
brought out the fact that they had
gone from Houston to Lampasas with
their bicycles chained up in the bag
gage car and FROM there had wheeled"
it to Austin. They were "gotten up
REGARDLESS, with knickerbockers, sur
cingles, flannel shirts with rolling
collars, etc., and the trip begun under
the happiest auspices. Everything
gave them the right of way. Farmers
en- route ''tu town" ran their
teams across bitches and through
barbed wire fences when they
saw them coming, and thanked
heaven that they had escaped with
their lives. The great drawback TO
the trip was the resistance which
the ozone offered to Fred's whiskers.
1t was not used to that style of hirsute
appendage and refused to dawdle
through them in familiar manner.
Finally they went into camp for the
night and decided to wash their
clothes in the brook that babbled by.
They did so and spreading them on
the bushes to dry lay down to peaceful
dreams. While they slept prowling
brindle COW came nosing about seeking
what she might devour and proceeded
20 make lunch of the silk surcingles
and had just begun on the knicker-
bockers when j. l.. muttered in his
sleep: The Post will give
the earth and red string
to swing it by to the
most popular gum chewing summer
girl in Texas. Send in your votes"
The brindle COW dropped the knicker-
bockers with the alacrity of tramp
printer relinquishing bowl of water
when asked to take suthin." Why
should she fill her internal economy
| with old stockings and brass pants
| buttons when more toothsome proven
der was to be had? She licked her
chops, uttered low moo of satisfac-
ton and started forward. That cry of
delight saved the sleepers. They
sprang to their feet with cry of hor-
ror, and with the narratives of their
neither garments streaming wildly in
the wind, made break for tall tim
Der. They were saved, but their gaudy
apparel was ruined.