Morning journal and courier., 1891-06-16
A KIND-HEARTRD DRUGGIsr.
Mark Twain Tells an Interesting
Story OF Him.

Mark Twain was present at the banquet
of the National Wholesale Druggists as
sociation at its recent meeting in Washing
ton, and in return for his dinner related
the following story, given in the Pharms-
ceutical Era:
About thousand years ago, approx
mately, was apprenticed as a printers
devil to learn the trade, in common with
three other hoys of about my own age.
There came to the village a long g-legged in
dividual of about nineteen from one of
the interior counties; fsh-eyed, no ex-
preston, and without the suggestion of a
smile-couldn't have smiled for salary.
We took him for fool, and thought we
would try to scare him to death. We
went to the village druggist and borrowed
skeleton. The skeleton didn't belong to
the druggist, but he hsd imported it for the
village doctor, because the doctor thought
he would send away for it, having some
delioacy about using-Laughter.) The
price of the skeleton at that time was fifty
dollars. l don't know how high they 60
now, but probably higher on account of
the tariff. Laughter) We borrowed the
skeleton about nine o'clock at night, and
We got this man-Nicodemus Dodge was
his name-we got him down town, out of
the way, and then we put the skeleton in
his bed. He lived in a little one-storied
log cabin in the middle of vacant lot
We left him to get home by himself. We
enjoyed the result in the light of antici-
patton; but by and by we began to drop
into silence; the possible consequences
were preying upon us. Suppose that it
frightens him into madness, overturns his
reason and sends him screeching through
the streetsl We shall spend sleepless
nights the rest OF our days Everybody
was afraid. By and by it WAS forced to
the lips of one of US that we had better go
at once and see what had happened
Loaded down with crime, we approached
that hut and peeped through the window.
That long-legged critter was sitting on his
bed with hunk of ginger bread in his
hand, and between the bites he played a
tune on a jews's- harp. There he sat per
fectly happy, and all around him on the
bed were toys and jim-cracks and striped
candy. The darned cuss, he had gone and
sold that skeleton for five dollars laugh
ter.) The druggists iftydollar skeleton
was gone. We went in tears to the drug
gist and explained the matter We could
not have raised that fifty dollars in two
hundred and fifty years. We were get
ting board and clothing for the first year,
clothing and board for the second year and
both of them for the third year But the
druggist forgave us on the spot but he
said he would like us to let him have our
skeletons when we were done with them
There couldn't be anything fairer than
that; we spouted our skeletons and went
away comfortable. But from that time
| the druggists prosperity ceased. That
rs tIa
| tions he ever went into. After some years
| one of the boys went and got drowned;
| that was one skeleton gone, and / tell you
! the druggist felt pretty badly about it. a
| few years after another of the boys went
| up in a balloon. He was to get five dol
lars an hour for it. When he gets back
they will be owing him one million dollars
The druggists property was decreasing
| right along. After few more years tbs
third boy tried an experiment to see if (
| dynamite charge would go. 1t went al
| right. They found some of him, perhap,
a vest-pocketful; still it was enough Il
show that some more of that estate had
gone. The druggist was getting along IL
/ years and he commenced to correspond
| with me. l have been the best correspon
dent he has. He is the sweetest-natured
man l ever saw; always mild and polite
and never wants to hurry me at all. / ge
a letter from him now and then and b,
never refers to my form as q skeleton
says, Well, how is it getting along-is i
in good repairr l got a night-rste mes
sage from him recently-said he was get
ting OLD and the property was depreciatinl
in value, and if 1 could let him have
part of it now he would give time on tn
balance. Laughterl Think of the grace
full way in which he does everything-th'
generosity of it all. You cannot find
finer character than that. 1t is the gra
cious characteristic of all druggists So
out of my heart, wish you all prosperit,
and every happiness"