davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
Old Jokes Are Good.

A professional bumorist said the other
day: .sThere is great truth about jokes
which both readers and writer's recog-
nize in practice, but do not often formu-
late. 1t is this:
A good joke improves no less with
age than does wine. Once upon time
there was a famous speaker whose toll
efably bad lecture started off and ended
with two of the most exquisite jokes
ever invented. People travelled miles
and sat patiently through the same lect-
1re year after year to split their sides
laughing at the same old jokes After
the effect of the introductory joke had
worn off there was always perfect 81.
lence until the lecture was three-quar-
ters done, when the anticipations of an
audience which had never been swindled
would begin to break out in gurgling
laughter, mods, winks and whispers of
sIt's comingw And when at last this
we'll seasoned old chunk of wit brought
the performance to close the very roof
was raised.
But one fatal night there was bad
case of dyspeptic pessimism in front
seat. It is true that when he roared
chestnut at the first joke the audience
nearly mobbed him, but the lecturers
tender spot was touched. He prepared
a new lecture, which began and ended
with two absolutely fresh jokes. When
the lecturer walked upon the platform
with his new manuscript in his hand he
received an ovation.
The first new joke seemed to stupefy
the people. But few sentences of the
new lecture woke them up, and they rose
as one man and demanded their money
at the box Office. At the next town the
lecturer affixed the old jokes to the new
lecture, and all went SO well that he is
still cracking them with constantly in
creasing success. Chicago Mail.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
THE MONMOUTH RACES.
Horses Who VIII Sport SILK in the Ea
Today.

Horses Who VIII Sport SILK in the East
Today.
The starters and weight for the differ.
ent races at Monmouth today are as fol
lows:
Three quarters-Arab, III; Reckon
Ill; Stryke, 1903; Carrie c., 100.
Optional stakes, selling, three-quarters
-Rhoda c., Wah Jim and Hamilton
Ill; st. Pancras, Airshaft, Prohibition
and Disappointment, 104; Moonraker
106; Lamplighter, 1903; Absconder and
Rolfe, 80; Mascot, 96.
Newark stakes, one mile-Adventurer
Register and Uno Grand, 155; Beansy
and Picknicker, 121; Judge Post and
Kirkover, ITO; Sir George 107; Fairy
117..
Five, NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS., colt, Take
Back, Brooklyn (formerly Happy John)
Schuylkill, Roller, Knap, Faux Pas, colt
Krush, Ale .lde, Sir Mathew, Flash, Ill
Maid Of Athel, filly, 106.
Mile and eighth, handicap-Lone
Dance, 118; Edgar johnson, 98, anG
Westchester, "a.
Mile and sixteenth, selling Edgal
johnson, 9S; Celia, S8 Esquimau, 112
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
Properties of Aluminium.

Before dealing with the many proc
esses now in the field for the cheap pro-
duction of aluminium, we may briefly
glance at the properties and special char
acteristics of the metal under considera-
ton. Aluminium has a white silver like
appearance, is both malleable and ductile,
and from its sonorous properties is much
used in the manufacture of bells. An
exceedingly important feature is its
hghtness, property which favors its
employment for many special purposes
aluminium has specific gravity of only
2.56-that is, is two and half times as
heavy as water, and is four times lighter
than silver.
Heat and electricity are conducted by
aluminium as well as by silver, while it
does not oxidize in air even at red heat,
has no action on water at ordinary tenn
perature, and preserves it's luster where
silver would tarnish, being thus specially
remarkable as the lightest metal capable
of resisting the action Of air even in the
presence of moisture. Chambers Jour
nal.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
At Mime. Recamier's.

The salon of Nine. Recamier was
not in any sense philosophical or polit-
ical, but after the cruel persecution of
La Harpe, the Punishment Of Nine. de
Stael, and the similar misfortunes of
other friends. her sympathies were too
strong for her diplomacy, and it grad
ually fell into the ranks of the opposi-
tion. It was well known that the en-
peror regarded all who went there as his
enemies, and this young and innocent
woman was destined to feel the full bit
terness of his petty displeasure.
We cannot trace here the incidents Of
her varied career, the misfortunes of the
father to whom she was ministering
angel, theloss of her husbands fortune
and her own, the years of wandering
and exile, the second period of brief and
Elusive prosperity, and the swift reverses
which led to her final retreat. She was
at the height of her fame in the early
days of the Restoration, when her salon
revived its old brilliancy, and was a
center in which all parties met on neutral
ground. Her intimate relations with
those in power gave it a strong political
influence, but this was never marked
feature. as it was mainly personal.
But the position in which one is most
inclined to recall Nine. Recamier is i'll
the convent of Abbaye-aux-B Bois, where,
Invested of fortune and living in the
simplest manner, she preserved for nearly
thirty years the fading traditions of the
old salons Through all the changes
which tried her fortitude and revealed
the latent heroism Of her character, she
seems to have kept her sweet serenity
unbroken, bending to the passing storms
with the grace of facile nature, but
never murmuring at the inevitable. One
may find in this infexible strength and
gentleness of temper clew to the subtle
fascination which held the devoted
friendship Of 50 many gifted men and
wemen long after the fresh charm o.
youth was gone.-Amelia Gere Mason
in Century.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
THE NATIONAL GAME.
How 1t Was Played Yesterday-Rain
Winner in Some Cases.

How 1t Was Played Yesterday-Rain the
Winner in Some Cases.
PITTsBuRG, July 20. Good all around
playing made the visitors easy winners
today. Pittsburg, Q; Cincinnati, 8.
Batteries: Baldwin, Mack; Mullane,
Harrington.
New YORK, July 29.-Both clubs
played we'll. Brooklyn, s.; Philadelphia,
a. Batteries: Lovett, Kinslow; Glea-
son, Clements.
BosroN, July 29.-Boston-New York
no game; rain.
BALTIMORE, July 29.-Baltimore, 8;
Boston, 2.
PHILADELPHIA, July 29.-Athletics-
Washington game postponed; rain.
DULUTH, July 29.-Duluth, Z; Kansas
City, 13.
MILWAUKEE, July 29.-Denver game
give to Milwaukee. 8 to 0, as Denver re-
fused to play.
M1NNEAPo1ls, July 29.-Minneapolis,
/; Lincoln, 4.
Sioux Cry. July 29.-sioux City, s;
Omaha, 3.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
NEEDHAM THE VICTOR.

Nahan Threw Up the Sponge After
Twenty-Nin Game Rounds.
SAN Francisco, July 20. = Danny
Needham, of st. Paul, and Billy Mahan,
of San Francisco, met in fight to a
finish for a $1500-purse, at the Occi-
dental club, tonight. This was their
second meeting, Needham having de-
feated Mahan in forty-three rounds at
Seattle last fall.
Mahan weighed 136 pounds; Need
ham, 13S. The men lost no time in get
ting to work, Mahan setting the pace,
while Needham waited to get in right
hand knockout. The latter caught a
corker on the nose in the first, but stop
ped the rush in the second with right
handler that nearly hoored Mahan.
Mahan punched Needham with both
hands in the succeeding rounds, landing
on all portions of the st. Paul boys
anatomy, while the latter still waited
with his. right. Mahan was warned
several times against punching too low,
but he claimed that Needham knocked
his hands down.
Needham landed two hard rights in
the ninth, bringing blood from Mahan's
nose. The latter continued to lead and
the first good exchange came in the
olRnbecQCn. mdIldu WdS Olcu UiCOuluS
at the ear and was exasperated at Need
hams coolness. The nineteenth was a
hot round and it looked as if Mahan
would fight himself out. In the twen-
tieth Needham met him with left and
right, swelling his left eye and bringing
blood from his mouth. Mahan was APP
parently groggy when the round closed,
while Needham seemed as fresh as at
the beginning.
Needham refrained from pushing mat
ters. Mahan freshened, but his left
hand jolts did less damage than Need
hams occasional counter which seldom
failed to raise lump or draw blood.
Mahan several times dropped, appar-
emily to avoid punishment, and at the
close of the twenty-ninth round he
came to the center of the ring and said
he had terrible pain under the heart
and that it was impossible for him to
stand punishment longer, and that he
would give up the fight. He was cheered
by many of the spectators, on leaving
the ring, for the gameness he had shown
during the fight. His face bore traces
of considerable punishment, willie Need
ham, save for swelling on his left
cheek and slight pufiness of the rib
flesh, was apparently unmarked.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
MORRIS PARK EVENTS.
The Longstreet-Tenny Match to Con
OF Saturday.

The Longstreet-Tenny Match to Come
or Saturday.
NORRIS PARK, July 29.-Weather
cloudy; track heavy. The match be-
tween Longstreet and Tenny will be run
Saturday, August 1st.
Sweepstakes, six furlongs-S Sleipner
won, Chesapeake second, Marystone
third; time, :161a.
Sweepstakes, five furlongs-W Walcott
won, Correction second, Kirkover third
time. :00A.
Sweepstakes, mile-Trot won, Celia
second, Marguerite third; time, 1 :4334
Sweepstakes, six furlongs-Roquefort
won, Salisbury second, Punster third
time, l IA.
Handicap sweepstakes, six furlongs-
Cadence won, Candelabra second, AL
calde third time, IA.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
cIined. "A half ladleful of soup is epoupb

clined. "A half ladleful of soup is enough
to serve, unless it is a country dinner,
where full ladleful may be given; but
do not fill the soup plate. Avoid the
appearance of self engrossment when
eating, unless you wish to be considered
entirely devoted to your food. Never
overload the plate of guest or any
person you would serve. If you are to
serve anything of which the supply is
limited, use discretion that all may en-
joy some Of it.-Mrs. S. H. Snider in
Housekeepers' Weekly.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
BRIGHTON BEACH RACES.
The TuIla Blackburn Kingston Mat
POstponed

The TuIIa Blackburn-K Kingston Match
Postponed.
BRIGHToN BEACH, July 29.-Weather
cloudy; track sloppy.
The match between Tulla Blackburn
and Kingston has been postponed.
Six furlongs and half. @. E. won,
Beck second, Insight third time, l: :25.
Five furlongs-Peruvian won, King
dom second, Refrain third time, :061s.
Seven urlongs-Dalsyrian won, Houri
second, Houston third; time, 1929.
Six and half furlongs- Emma won,
Blossom second, Monterey third; time,
l:25.
Mile-Seymour won, Romance second,
Puzzle third time, 1:471s.
Six and half furlongs-L Lithbert won,
Willie second, Mucilage third; time,
:2434.
Five furlongs--Wave won, Cober Sec
ond, Davis third; time, :O6.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
Pritchard Challenges Mitchell.

New YoRK, July 29.-The Police Ga
zette has special cable from London
saying Ted Pritchard has challenged
Charley Mitchell to fight for $4,000 and
the championship of England. Pritch-
ard says he is not going to the United
States, but is willing to fight either
Fitzsimmors or Hall for $4,000 a side
and allow expenses.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
Promiscuous Cutting.

CHARLESTON, S. c., July 29.-At an
Alliance barbecue at Prosperity, New
berry county, today serious cutting
affraysoccurred between James Hunter
and the Morrises. 1t was caused by
an old feud between these parties.
Hunter was struck on the head with a
club and seriously injured. Geo. Morris
received a bad cut in the face and neck,
which may prove fatal. H. NJ. Singley
rushed in to stop the fight and was seri-
ously. perhaps fatally, cut in the throat.
F. Julius Epting was cut in the back OF
the hand in trying to stop the fight, and
several others received minor injuries.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
CLEVELAND CIRCUIT.
Temple Bar ExpelIed-Hal,P Pointers r.
M markable Pacing.

TompIe Bar <folnter's fse
markable Pacing.
CLEVELAND, July 29.--In the 2:14
class race today Temple Bar was favor
ite, and it soon became apparent that
ing to win. After the third heat drivers
were changed. and Temple Bar won in
straight heats. At the conclusion OF the
race the horse, his driver and his owner
DIR. M. s. Sale of Kentucky, were ex-
PEELED from the National Trotting asso
ciation..
The performance OF Hal Pointer in
the free tor all pace was remarkable.
He not only broke the track record for
PAGERS, 2:l11, but made the three fast
est heats ever paced in q race. The track
was fast ~
Glass 2:2l trot, $4,000, unfinished yes
terday Lakewood Prince Won New
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
A Thiers Opportunity.

SAG HARBoR, L. l., July 29.-During
circus procession here, today. the Pc
comic bank was robbed of $4,000. All
the clerks, but one, were on the street
watching the procession, and that one
had left his desk to watch the procession
through front window. The thief en-
tered by the back door, seized pack
age OF money, and ran out the same way
he entered, being soon lost in the
crowd. The robber has not been
captured.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
DisilluSiOn.
Oh, sweet reality long deferred
PIa-f ho,,o cr fair a nd cfropul

Oh, sweet reality long deferred
Blest hope SO fair and strongl
And love notes trembled in each soft word
Till scared my spirit like somc glad bird
Whose heart to tenderest deeps Is stirred
And my soul burst forth in songl
No fear gave warning or doubt demurred;
Faith lulled in slumbcrs long
That same sweet symphony oft required,
Y And dearer, tenderer each time heardS
Like wood note wild of love mad bird
Y Whose being is lost in song!
All, page of destiny, dim and blurred
With tears of pain and wrongl
y All, means Of agony all unheard!
Blind fool to trust in woman's world
Nay, never again shall this heart be stirred
By glories of sun or songl
-eMontgomery NJ. Folsom in Atlanta Constitu.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
sarotoga RACES.

SARATOGA, July 29.-The races were
continued here today. There was a
heavy shower this morning which laid
the dust, but did not stiffen the track.
Purse $400, for 2.year-olds, six fur
longs-Galinda won, Charade Second,
Foreigner third; time, :1624.
Mile and one-sixteenth Carroll won,
Ballyhoe second, King Grab third
time, 81 :50A.
Six furiongs Glen won, ORR
noco second, Little Minch third; time,
16.
Five furlongs-T Tom Tough won, Mount
McGregor second, Beaverwick third
time, / :0334.
Mile-Gettysburg won, Golden Rule
second, Saunders third time, l :445
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
Quite an Every Day Anair.

One of the Rescuing Party-My man,
you have had a miraculous escape! Blown
fifty feet through the air and then piled
Under 500 tons of brick and mortar. You
don't seem to realize your good luck;
Just as cool as cucumber.
The Survivor (calmly)-I don't mind a
little thing like this. You see, boys, !
married red hair and a temper. Pitts
burg Bulletin.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
Needham Again Defeats Billy
Mahan, Of San Francisco.
Hal Pointer PAGES the Three
Fastest Heats on Record.
Brandolette Shows Wonderful Speed
at Chicago.
Galinda, of the Santa Anita Stable,
Wins at Saratoga-Interesting
Sporting News from
All Points.

Yolo Maid, the celebrated California
PAGER, had her colors lowered yesterday
by Hal Pointer, the fastest pacing
stallion in the world. 1t was no dis
grace to be beaten by such speedy
PAGER as Hal Pointer, especially when it
is borne in mind that he had to break
the record in order to gain the victory.
The time made by Hal Pointer is phe-
nomenal. To cover three miles each
under 2:11 shows that he is not only
the speediest but the gamest of all the
g idewheelers in the country.
x*x
New York Central, who finished Sec
ond in the trotting race, is by Simmons,
the sire of Gossiper, Raymond and sew
eral other horses owned in Southern
California, including the fashionable
bred 2-year-old filly recently purchased
by DIR. K. D. Wise.
x*x
Brandolette who yesterday ran one
mile and seventy yards in the record
time of AS is bay filly years old by
Job Johnson. In 1890 he started in fif-
teen races and was first past the post in
two races only.
x*x
The match race between Tenny and
and Longstreet was postponed on ac-
count of the rain and has been set to
come off on Saturday. The writer is
hardly prepared to venture decided
opinion, but on public form the sway
back appears to have the best of it.
XIV
Galinda who won yesterday at Sara
toga, is a two-year-old bred in this
county, and is in the Santa Anita string
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
4 IRON IN HIS GLOVE.
How an Obscure Pugilist Tried to win q
Fight.

M Fight.
WALLA WALLA, Wash, July 29.-Early
this morning Billy Pool, OF St. Paul, and
Jack Bane, an unknown, fought eleven
rounds with gloves, just across the Ore
gon line. The first two rounds were in
Bane's favor, but in the third round be
began to weaken, and in the ninth he
was almost knocked out by Pool. From
that time the fight. was all in POOLS
favor. At the end of the eleventh round
the referee noticed Bane put something
into his belt, and upon examin alton il
was fonnd that he had been using a piece
of iron in his right glove. The fight
was Immediately awarded to Pool,
Bane's face was badly disfgured.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
Lofty Lineage.

DENNIsoN, Tex. July 29.-Martha D.
Washington, of this city, widow of the
late DR.. Washington, died here today,
aged IL. The deceased was the wife of a
grandson OF the illustrious father of this
country, and perhaps the most direct
descendant, as his home in this city con-
tains a. sword and several letters and
other articles belonging to General
Washington.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30

Pretty hot weather, isn't it Just
the time one appreciates cool summer
shoes, particularly when you can buy
them at almost half their former price.
Gibson & Tyler Co. are offering russell
shoes from $3.50 to s.; formerly sold at
$4 to $3.50.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
Matches Postponed.

New YORK, July 29.--The Tenny-
Longstreet match race set for today at
Morris park, was postponed on account
of the bad condition of the track. The
Kingston-Tul Blackburn race at
Brighton Beach will be run on Monday !;
that OF Tenny and Longstreet on day
to be agreed upon by the owners of the
horses and the Monmouth Park Racing
association.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30

York Central second, Trim third, Abbie
v. fourth; best time, :16s4.
Free for al pace, purse $2000-Hal
Pointer won, Yolo Maid second, Dallas
third; time, 2:1034, 2:l0M, 2:10H.
Glass 2:27 trot, $2000-Happy Bee
won, Nth second, Jerry L. third. King
Chester fourth; best time, 2:17L.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
Long and Short of It.

Tailor-Haven't you run pretty long
account here, sir?
.Wentman-I don't know But at
home I've run confoundedly short. =
American Grocer.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
Goodwood Stakes.

LONDON, July 29.-The racing at Good
wood was continued today. Goodwood
stakes. two miles and half, was won
by G. A. RulIs's White Feather, j. B.
Burton's Barfnecide second, Baron de
Hirsch's Vasistas third.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
Twin CITY Track.

ST. PAUL, July 29.-First race-Catal-
pa won, Harry Ray second, Louise M
third time, / :45.
Mile and fifty yards-Polemus won,
Pat Conley second, Royal Garter third ;
time, :471s.
Five furlongs-Minnie L won, Lena
Frey second, Newton third; time,
102s4. sYs
Six furlongs-Fi heat: Sympathet-
ic's Last won, Glockner second, Leader
third; time, :1634. Second heat: Sym
pathetic's Last won, Billy Pinkerton
second, Glockner third; time, :1534.
Mile and sixteenth-Kingman won,
Eli second, w. G.. Morris third; time,
/ :51M.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
NONE BUT
ROYAL

(See u. S. Govt Reports No other made from
specially refined for it chemically pure No
other makes such light sweet finely favored wholesome
food No other will maintain its strength without loss until
used will make bread cake that will keep fresh long,
that eaten hot with mpunity by dyspepcs No
other is economical
The official chemists of the United States Canada State
analysts municipal boards of health and physicians ndorse
the great qualities of the Royal Baking Powder
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30

The electric lights were put out at AL
this morning, leaving the city in dark
ness, as the moon had not made its ap
pearance at that hour.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30

II. J. woollacott, agent for w. and A. Gilbey
London. Finest liquors for medicinal use
12z and 126 N. Spring street.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30

WHY WILL YOU cough when Ehiloh's Cure
viii give immediate relief? Price 10 cts 30
eta. and 81. For sale by Heinzeman, 222 n.
Main, or Trout. Sixth and Broadway
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30
6aratoga Chit

Asa vair srocerfor the Mrs. Holmes Saratoga
Chips
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30

Use German family soap.
Los Angeles herald., 1891-07-30

Baking Powder is
absolutely pure. No
other equals it, or
approaches it in
leavening strength,
purity, or whole
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1891-10-14
DIED

YEAkLE-On the 9th inst. in this
place, John Yeakley, aged II years
IL months rnd 2S days.
McKINLY.-On the Both ult., il
'Tuscarora township, Alexander Me
Kinley, in the Slth year of his age.
SrRoUsE.-On the 4th last, at
Mexico station, Turbett township
sn infant child Of Mr.. and Mrs. Phil.
fip Strouso.
WRIGHT.-zOn the 4th inst, Mt the
Residence of her son-in-law, W. II.
jackson. in Altoona, Mrs. Elizabeth
Mccoy, widow OF the late David
Wright, of Fermanagh township
aged 81 years 7 months aad 2t
days.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1891-10-14

About 3 O'Clock last Wednesday
morning Joseph Powley of Harris
burg, freight train conductor was
Knocked off his train and robbed of
his keys, his pocket-book, containing
a twenty dollar gold piece and sever
al dollars in silver. The conductor
said: THE train Of which I am con-
ductor was just pulling out of Lew
lstown about 3 o'clock this morning
on It's way to Harrisburg, so 1 suppose
that the two tramps who attacked
me boarded it at that point. 1 was
standing on the bumper of box car
about ten cars from the engine, when
heard a noise above me and look
ing up, discovered two men standing
on top of the car. Before 1 could
size them up correctly, one Of them
nit me on the head with some bard
substance, which L suppose was the
bottle that was picked up along the
track with my cap after the assault,
and OF course L dropped falling be
tween the bumpers aud outside the
track with the exception of my right
hand, which WAS caught by the
wheels of the car and mashed badly.
While lying there the two men Jump
ed from the train, and while one Of
them choked me the other went
through my pockets They uttered
not word but silently without any
waste OF time did their work. They
would have secured my watch also
had l not held it tight until help ar
rived. Outside of noting that one OF
the men was tall and wore dark
clothes and derby, and that the
other was short, with dark clothes,
and soft hat, l could not accurately
describe their personal appearance,
OWING to the darkness and the fact
that they gave me no time to recog-
nlge them more INFINITELY. l should
judge that they were men ranging
ing in age from 80 to 36. Ny es-
cape from more serious injury was
nGrrow as the train was running
about ten to twelve miles an hour al
the time. In riy struggle with 'jhe
: thieves | calle5 for help. Fiagmar
William Garnan heard me and haC
the train stopped. The hands came
Back to my rescue and the Williams
: t-an away.
The conductor was taken to lewis
. town where his injuries were attend
ed to by the compnny's physician
, after whichhe was removed to Har
! frisburg where his injuries are being
, cared for. \ number of arrests have
: been made.