The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1891-04-03
ADVERTISING PAYS.

VAscouvER. B. c., April For thirteen
long years Robert Gamble, who lives at
Mount Lehman, about fifty miles up coun-
try from here, had . partner in life-one
who bore his joys and sorrows, who
laughed with him when the sun shone
brightly. and condoled with him when
things went wrong, who scrubbed and
washed, and cooked, and mended his
clothes. and MIXED the cows, and baked,
and what not all, while he titled the soil.
She died and was buried. The old man
still hung on. and with his boy of II. tried
to live the same contented, happy life that
used TO be when Frau Gamble did the
chores.
But it was no use. 1t was hard lines to
have to come home at night from the
swamp where he had been cutting rails all
day, and then have to hustle around and
light FIRE and cock something to eat.
Then to wash. the dishes and, tired and
weary, to turn in between the damp sheets
with the pleasant prospec. ahead of being
compelled to climb ont in the morning to
cook his own rasher of bacon before going
to work. There was no sentiment about
life, no comfort, no happiness, no more of
the old content. no more of the fieeting
Joy OF thinking of the ''gnde wife
nothing, in fact.
Nor was this ALL Gamble felt in his
bones he was not 50 young as he once was.
Time and toll had deprived him of that
kittenish disposition he once had. Care
and worry had caused his once flowing
locks to fee, while the scraggy red whiskers
were still scraggier and the square
shoulders had become stopped and
rounded. No more could he toy with the
affections of maiden-his day Of wooing
was lost and gone forever. Dreams he
might have of how some wandering Philiis
might run across his path, but these he
dismissed, for being practical, matter-of-
fact man, he had sized up the situation
and knew there was no hope of his ever
again becoming brilliant or successful
crusader in the matrimonial battlefield.
But marry he must. How? That was
the question. ALI schemes we're consid-
cred. A love match he dismissed as being
out of the question. The most feasible
one would be, he thought. one conducted
on a strictly business basis. This is the
way the whole thing was figured out:
1, Robert Gamble, aged about 45, want a
wife and want one badly. Personal beauty
well, not much to speak of. Brains
about as much as the average settler who
undertakes to hew q fortune out of pine
forest and dig competency out of the
uncultured soil But these have: First,
good home; second, plenty of work;
third, q little property. Now, thought he,
If there is anyone in the world
who wants a home, and some work
to do, and the satisfaction of knowing
that there's enough in the homestead to
keep her during her old age, that's the
woman I want. And, he argued, there
must be someone anyway if only one that
win I'LL the bill Like a sensible man, he
conclude ed to advertise. Hitching up the
old grey horse he drove to Westminster
and put an advertisement in the local
papers. One week of a wait, but no reply.
Then he went one better and tried the
Vancouver papers. The editor of one of
the evening journals was sitting alone i'll
his Office one rainy night and had just
finished grinding out some copy for the
first takes in the morning. With hest
tating steps Gamble walked in. BE you
the editor?" he asked. Being answered in
the affirmative. he continued: II want to
advertise FOR wife, and guess you ken
right the notice ruther better than l KEN
.All right said the scribe. go ahead.
Now what do you wants"
ssI want wife," again replied Gamble,
much relieved.
"Yes, but what kind of a wife?''
He never smiled "A middle-aged woman
as can cook and look after things. Make
it plain SOS she'll understand" he con-
tinued, ..for doan't want any o. them
gals what don't know nawthing."
Some more explanation followed, and
this is the advertisement which next day
appeared in the personal column:
JVANTED--& WIFE; \ MIDDLE-AGED
Mount Lehman: oilers rood home: has one boy.
Il wears old. and Is comfortably well eff. Apply
by letter 10 Robert Gamble, Vancouver postoihce,
and he VIII cali.
Mr.. Gamble received several replies, but
none of the applicants for the position of
wife, were up to his expectations. He
wanted a heipmeet; they wanted a home
only, and he thought they were too shall
low-minded to fill the bill. The ideal
didn't come along until just as he was
getting about discouraged. Hope had
almost vanished, when he got letter from
Calgary A Eth application it was, and
the very tenor of the epistie once more
filled his heart with faith An answer was
sent at once: the rep!y was satisfactory,
and last Tuesday the lady came along by
train, was met at the depot by her unseen
betrothed and the engagement contract
was ratified for good by Westminster
clergyman. She who is now Mrs. Gamble
had purchased Vancouver paper near
Calgary, and seeing the advertisement
thought she could Eli the bill.
All is now settled. In the words of the
orthordox finale TO dramatic incident;
Gamble now looks ten years younger. his
bride fair, fat and forty proudly presides
over happy household. and the world
ways on to the same old tune.