The record-union., 1891-05-10
Barnum's Truism That the People
Like to Be Humbugged.
a Great Showman-Dealings With
Phenomenons and s''Indians''-The
Managers Make up - Successful
Operations of Street Phrenologists.
"Oh, it's a fake.u

crooked sporting affairs and theatricals.
The word "fake'' is generally tabooed by
real nice folks as emanating from slang
dom.
1t may have been slang once, but it's
English now.
Just look in your big unabridged
Webster's dictionary. You will not lind
the word in the regular compilation, but
turn back to the appendix or supplement
and you will see that the author defines
the word as "a trick; a swindle." He
might have added, as another synonym,
''humbug," but he was probably in a
hurry and forgot it.
Speaking of humbugs, fakes or
swindles, I might quote from the late
World-famous Snowman, P. T. Barnum.
Old Barnum used to say that people like
TO be humbugged, and judging from the
success he had in the business, there IS
little doubt but that he was right. Bar
mum was himself All expert in
that line, getting up more humbugs
and on larger scale than perhaps any
other man that could be named. He evil
IDENTIFY knew what he was talking about
when he made that remark. People do
like to be humbugged, and they are
never satisfied unless they are taken
in" paradoxical as it may seem.
An illustration of this peculiar quality
in human nature may be seen every
evening on the streets of Sacramento,
where the fallirs operate uninterrupted.
Some Of these anti-labor individuals
peddle out wondrOuS antidOtes and
6liXirs warranted to make the old
young again, and the young still
younger. If their medicine could be ad-
ministered TO a man who was just in the
al
matter what his ailment-broken neck or
anything else-he would Immediately
change his mind fool the angels, and
stay with US hundred years, according
20 the songs of these festive fakirs.
Others sell trinketS and novelties of
aIluring type, and still others deal out
wisdom in art, science and such in large
chunks. Another class, of more
aggravated type are the so-called
street phrenOlOglStS, one OF whom
operated successfully at Fourth and
Il streets only Il week ago. These
iakirs examine the heads Of people, tell
them all about their peculiarities, eccen-
triCities, and tendencies, by feeling of
their bumps, looking wise and declaring
that they can interpret not only outward
marks and signs, but the very thoughts
OF their subjects. They awaken the
interest and perhaps the awe Of
the listening crowds by exhibiting a
CHASTITY scOnce atfectiOnately, and talking
learnedly after their peculiar fashion
albeit they take great and unwarrantable
liberties with the Queens English.
Then they invite the throng to come
up one by one and have their
heads felt at two bits feel. And
the number of suckers that they
catch is astonishingIy large. 1 even saw
well-knOwn professional man jump
into line the other night and submit his
Uranium TO the takir's fingers. Most of
those examined seem perfectly satisfied
that their money has been well invested
This is accomplished by the fakir very
cleverly, by dealing out a liberal supply
OF ''taffy" and telling the subject that he is
bound to make a great success in life and
that he is destined to be Mayor or Presi-
dent Of the United States. The subject
steps down OFT the platform, shakes
hands with himself and his admiring
friends, and votes the doctor" great
man.
Yes, Barnum was right. The people
do like to be humbugged.
Barnum was a Snowman, and a great
one at that. Great showmen are scarce.
1t is hard to give a good idea of how
scarce they are. / can only think OF the
exalted -Four Hundred out OF popu-
lation of millions who Jointly breathe
the ozone Of the Atlantic in the great
metropolis of the Union, and say
that comparatively the proportion of
great shOwmen, if we count ali that claim
TO be ShOwmen, is much smaller. Shakes
peare says: Some are born great, some
achieve greatness, and some have great
ness thrust upon them" Old Shake was
not referring to showmen when he wrote
that, but il fits nicely.
But / have prepared a little recipe, at
considerable expense and research, for
the manufacture of common, ordinary,
L. sHH,g
and file Of to-day, and / herewith offer it
gratis. Cut ii out and paste il in your
hat if you are ambitious.
Now, in the first place you must get a
plug hat and an overgrOwn diamond
crayat-pin. All showmen have to have
these in order to be successful, particu-
laTly the diamond. The quality of this
gem does not amount TO so much, but
everything depends upon its size. The
greater the Snowman the greater
the diamond. Take Charley Hall,
for instance. Well, now you have
these requisites, and the next things you
must supply yourself with are man
ayers directory, a dictionary (for show
bill purposes Only) a printer who viii
trust you, a railroad guide, and com
pany, the members of which are only in
the business for glory, and will not ask
you for q guarantee for their salaries.
Now you make up your route from your
G,
get some faxed newspaper clippings
booming your company as the greatest
on earth lit's better to use the names of
papers which do not exist in working
this snap, and thus save trouble) and
then have your showbills printed. Get
all the printing you can on credit.
The next and by far the most import
ant thing TO do is 70 use your best en-
deavors and most persuasive eloquence
to find an Indian" or an Angel"
To the beginner it may be necessary
here 10 explain the difference between an
Indian" and an Angel" The "Indi-
an'' is a stole who possesses the sublime
quality Of being able 10 lose all the money
he has without showing signs of suffer
ing. The "Angel' possesses all the ad-
mirable qualities of the Indian, " and be-
sides, that of sincere sympathy for you il
you are unfortunate in your enterprise. II
you can't get one of these articles, and no
famous business representative" or
even common advance agent can be
found willing to take chances on your
outht. get any other trst-clasS liar and
give hln beer money enough 10 mingle for
lew days with some of the celebrated
young men who have been on the road a
season or two, especially those who have
been ahead Of female minstrel show or
a ten-Cent circus. These worthless are
never backward about giving all neces-
sary information, and, under the inilu-
ence Of couple of layers will furnish a
valuable list of country editors, petty
railroad officers, and influential citi-
zens who, on the strength of an
Introductory card, or the mere men
ton oftheir names, viii give your bust
ness representative anything he asks for.
Now, if you fail on all these, you must. as
a last resort, engage one Of those Tdya
qyis-a well-seasoned, hardened theatrical
manager. If he be what the name im-
plies, you can always count on getting
from one town to another with Your COM
., N 10 crra on too and this Is tho o,r,l =.