The Caucasian. (Clinton, N.C.) 188?-1913, 1891-04-09


or chuckle about eternity, or smirk
about the things of the immortal soul
You know what caused the accident
years ago on the Hudson River railroad.
1t was an intoxicated man who for q
Joke pulled the string of the air brake
and stopped the train at the most dan
gerous point of the journey But the
lightning train, not knowing there was
any impediment in the way, came
down, crushing out of the nangled vic
TINS the immortal souls that went speed
ing instantly to God and Judgment 1t
was only joke. He thought it would
be such fun to stop the train. He
stopped it! And SO infidelity is chiefly
anxious to stop the long train of the
Bible, and the long train of the churches,
and the long train of Christian infiu-
ences, while coming down upon us are
death, judgment and eternity, coming
a thousand miles a minute, coming with
more force than all the avalanches that
ever slipped from the Alps, coming with
more strength than all the lightning
express trains that ever whistled or
shrieked or thundered across the CONT
nent.
THE LAUGHTER OF FOOLS.
Now, in this iocularity of infidel
thinkers | cannot join, and l propose
to give you some reasons why I cannot
be an infidel, and SO I will try to help
out of this present condition any who
may have been struck with the awful
plague Of skepticism.
First, I cannot be an infidel because
intidelity has no good substitute for the
consolation it proposes to take away
You know there are millions of people
who get their chief consolation from
this book. What would you think of
a crusade of this sort2 Suppose man
should resolve that he would organize
a conspiracy to destroy all the medi-
cines from all the apothecaries and
from all the hospitals of the earth. The
work is done The medicines are taken
and they are thrown into the river or
the lake, or the sea.
A patient wakes up at midnight in a
! paroxysm of distress and wants an
anodyne ''Oh," says the nurse, 'the
anodynes are all destroyed; we have
no drops to give you, but instead OF
that I'll read you book on the alb
surdities of morphine and on the alb
surdities of all remedies" But the man
continues to writhe in pain, and the
nurse says: ''Pll continue to read you
some discourses on anodynes, the cruel
! ties of anodynes, the indeceneies OF
anodynes, the absurdities of anodynes
For your groan I'll give you a laugh.
Here in the hospital is a patient having
gangrened limb amputated. He says
'Oh, for ether! Oh, for chloroforln =
The doctors say: ''Why, they are al
destroyed; we don't have any more
chloroform, or ether; but l have go
something great deal better. I'll reat
you pamphlet against James Y. Simp
son, the discoverer of chloroform as al
an@sthetic, and against Doctors Agney
and Hamilton and Hosack ant
Mott and Harvey and Abernethy
But" says the man, Il must hav,
some anasthetics. No" say th
doctors, ''they are all destroyed
but we have got something
great deal better" What is that?
Fun" Fun about medicines. Lii
down, all ye patients in Bellevue hos
pital, and stop your groaning; all y
broken hearted of all the cities, ant
quit your crying; we have the cathol
icon at last! Here is a dose of wit
here is a strengthening plaster of sal
casIn; here is bottle of ribaldry tina
you are to keep well shaken up, an
take a spoonful of it after each meal
and if that does not cure you, here is
solution of blasphemy in which yo
may bathe, and here is a tincture {
derision. Tickle the skeleton of deaf
with a repartee! Make the King {
Terrors cackle For all the agonies O
all the ages, joke! Millions of peopl
willing with uplifted hand towar
heaven to affirm that the gospel {
Jesus Christ is full of consolation fe
them, and yet infdelity proposes
take it away, giving nothing, abs
lutely nothing, except fun. Is thel
any greater height or depth or lengt
or breadth or immensity of meannes
in all Gods universe!
MISERY OF IGNORANT NO-FAITH.
Infdelity is religion of don
: know" Is there a God? Don't know
Is the soul iInmortal2 Don't know!
: we should meet each other in the flu
ure world will we recognize each othel
Don't know! A religion of ''Don
.. know for the religion of Il know"
know in whom l have believed"
) know that my Redeelner liveth." Il
fidelity proposes to substitute a religic
of awful negatives for our religion I
glorious positives showing right befol
us a world of reunion and ecstasy an
high companionship and glorious wo
ship and stupendous victory; IL
mightiest Joy on earth not high enoue
to reach to the base Of the Himalaya
, uplifted splendor awaiting all tho
!, who on wing of Christian ia ith W
soar toward it.
Have you heard of the conspiracy
put out all TIE lighthouses on the coas
Do you know that On certain mig
Of next month Eddystone lighthous
Bell Rock, lighthouse, Sherryvore ligf
L house, Montauk lighthouse, Halter
> lighthouse, New London iShthous
Barnegat lighthouse, and tie six hu
dred and forty lighthouses on the a
lantic ard Pacific coasts are to be e
tinguished? oh" you say, ''wh
). viii become of the ships on that nigh
, What will be the fate of the one inilli'
sailors following the sea? What W
; be the doom of the millions of passe
gers2 Who will arise to put down su
conspiracy?" Every man, wom
: and child in America and the worl
But that is only fable. That is wh
;, infidelity is trying to do, put out all t