The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1891-04-24
BRIGHT BITS.

DO YOU know. Ethel said Chappie that
you dwell in my mind altogether"
Il don't either" said Ethel, and what is
more, never shall live in a fiat as long as
live. Epoch.
ToSMY-My grandpa has voted for twelve diff
ferent Presidents.
Jimmy-Ah, de ole mans not in it, My daddy
voted twelve times for one Observation-Disclosures
dpoltS Journal.
EXCITED LADY-Why don't you interfere to
Bystander / was just goiu' to, mum; but you
kin calm y'r fears now. My dog is on top at
last, mum.-0OOd NetCS.
Administering your visit TO Boston did
you encounter Cupids darts?
Bertha-Boston Cupf1s do not use darts,
Arahella-What, then, do they use?
Bertha-Bean shooters.-PucE.
MODEST MAHIsTIoK-Oh! l can't expect to
get on the line-space is so limited, you know
Sympathetic Sara-But, if there isn't room on
one line, why don't they put another higher
up, or something's Cords cheap enough. -
Run.
BRIDGES They tell me you don't like the new
minister very we'll.
Brooks like him we'll enough. but his SER
mons are too confoundedly short. Why don't
realize that | have been asleep at all.-NelC
York Herald.
why, Johnny is very bad sometimes and
the only closet | have to shut him up in is
where the preserves are. / put the mask on
him with lock and the preserves are safe ~
HaTper'S BdzUr.
DO BRUTEs have Language? ?" asked the pres.
ident OF the Midwife Literary Circle at recent
meeting
do they9" replied the secretary; you ought
to hear my husband when he loses his collar
button. "-Net0 York Recorder.
"wE1Ip prisoner" said the prison chaplain to
the convict, whose time was nearly up, II hope
your punishment has done you good"
Yves, sir, it has, returned the prisoner
ITS put me in bully trim TO 20 back to town
ana knock thunder out of the witnesses who
convicted me. The Epoch.
THE SENATOR from Vermont is mistaken
he is fighting a windmill" said Roscoe Conk-
ling one day in the Senate.
81 know it, Mr.. President" retorted the man
who has just resigned, turning his face thought.
fully towards the senator from New York
| NO one ever said that George F. Edmunds
could not hold his own with the best of them -"
Springfield Republican.
On, MATTERS mundane now and then
Get singularly mixed:
Here is an inconsistency
That hardly can be fixed.
know hard and narrow man,
mlser and morose.
Who, though million miles away,
Would still be just as close.
Boston Courier.
Mr.. YoUNGHUsBAND (who has been out in a
hurry to get theater tickets Here we are! |
couldn't get seats at the Frvolity, but have Sc
cured capital places at the Jollity,
Mrs. Eounghusband-The Jollity? O, how
thoughtless of you, Edward! Don't you know
that the seats are crimson there? Why, they
would simply kill our dresses You must really
go back and change the tickets for some other
theater where the seats are of more becoming
color-FInny Folks.
SINGERLY-what are the Kildeers doing since
they lost their fortune?
Strawber-I understand that they are doing
very well. He is writer Of songs, and she is a
dressmaker.
Singerly-Tndeed. shouldn't think they
could make their salt at it, because dressmakers
have such time collecting their bills
Strawber-Her husband attends to that
When they have any trouble with a debtor he
sings him one of his songs. Brooklyn Life