Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1891-01-10

MIR. AND MRS. BowsEk.
A Question Of Corns-Drsssnaksrs vsrsas
Tsilors.
From the Detroit Free Pres.
| I HAD been suffering with . soft corn for
L about week before Mr.. Bowser suddenly In
| quired:
"whas on earth makes you limp - you
walk2"
II didn't know e. did limp. Ihsve corn,
| however"
'Corn-yes! Evidence that the fools are not
all dead yet! Good enough for you or any
other woman who'll jam her No. s feet into No.
shoes. Hope you'll have dozenr'
''Corns don't always come from wearing
tight shoes"
Don't they? Bet you million dollars to .
| cent they do! Can't come any other way, and
q man or woman who will wear shoes too small
for them ought to be published to the public At
large as non compos mentis."
On the third day after the above converse
ton ! noticed that Mr.. Bowser imped a. he
came home to supper.
Had fall?" queried.
mo, lam"
~ notice that you are lame"
"Not much! I'm not one Of the lame sort"
was sure that he was uncomfortable. If not
| sunerlng, but nothing more was said until
| after supper. Then he lodged upstairs aud
when went upstairs after him few minutes
off.
.'Foot was cold and thought would rub it
| . little, you know" he explained.
..Mr. bowser. you've got a cornw
"Never!"
herer'
.Bosh! My foo, is cOld-thass all. Corn!
Id like to see corn come on my footr'
Hold II up here! There! There, Mr. Bow
ser, If that isn't corn between your toes then
never saw one, It's soft corn. It comes
from a tight shoe. Your toes have been pinched
until they rubbed together"
1T can't be-"
But it is"
"A man or woman who will weaa. shoes too
small for them ought"
He drove me out of the room and locked the
door, hut ] had the satisfa ction of knowing
that he suffered for a whole week. The near
est he owned up to it was when he came home
and said
mo wonder suffered. Carbuncles are ten
der things. 1t would have put you in bed"
81 never heard Of a carbuncle between the
toes"
Probably not. There are several things in
TINS world you have never heard Of, smart as
you are"
Expected a new dress to come up one even
ing In time for party to which we had been
invited. At 6 o'clock he began to grow un-
why on earth didn't you have it here this
at wasn't DONE"
Then you should have given your order
farther ahead. Mrs Bowser, you are q very
..But the dress will be here by ~
bet you two farms to a cent! Never knew
anything Of yours to come up within twenty
-FOUR hours OF the time promised. That is q
nice state of affairs, must say!'
The dress will come"
Not until tomorrow and we might az we'll
make up our minds to stay at home'
1t was there at $50 and he got out Of it by
saying that it was a mistake for which the
dressmaker would probably commit suicide. A
week later he ordered a new suit, STIMULATING
tnat they we're to be sent up at noon on a GER
tain day. We were to 60 to party that night,
and at breakfast queried;
DO You feel certain of your new suit?''
DO feel certain that live?" he replied,
with grand wave of his hand.
But it may not come up"
And the sun may bust its biler and the
pieces tumble to earth. The clock will not
nave struck IL before that suit is here"
But when he came up to dinner had to in
form him that no suit had arrived.
"Oh, well the parcel boy is taking it slow"
ne answered. "It will be here before co."
But it wasn't. He waited ten minutes over
time and then went to the telephone and called
the tailor up and said:
II suppose that suit has started on its way
up"
could not, Of course, hear the reply.
"Why, that suit ordered week ago."
[Tailor's reply unheardl
you haven't! That's pretty idea! Do you
mean to tell me that suit isn't inished?'
tTailors reply unheardl
well, you see that you do! If it's one min
ute after I'll leave the suit on your handsr'
'How about my dressmaker?" I asked as he
hung up the trumpet.
How about nothing! Dressmakers deliber-
ately perjure themselves, while this was mere
oversight. It'll be up at g."
''And if not?'
Didn't 1 Say it would be up at 6? Make all
your arrangements to go to that party
When he came home at and failed to find
the suit he turned five shades winter Going
to the phone he yelled to the tailor:
"Where in Halifax is that suit of mine?'
Tailor reply unheard.l
"No, it hasn't! What do you mean by such
conduct?'
[Tailor's reply unheard.]
Yes, II it comes at sharp7, but not minute
later! You folks down there must have ali
been on a drunk this weekn'
SIS it coming at 7?'' asked.
Certainly. didn't expect it before. lint
wanted to hurry 'em up little
We'll, hope it will come"
Hope! 1t will come, and that's all there is
about it,
But z o'clock came without the suit. It
didn't come at half-past nor at 8, and Mr..
Bowser called up the central and was told that
the tailor shop was shut up. He danced up
and down; raped on the box, kicked the cat
and told baby to shut up, and fually he fell
into chair and looked at me in a cold, lev
way.
well, how about dressmakers?" / asked
''Not word, Mrs. Bowser-not q word! I
see how it is!'
''How what is?''
''More of your revengeful work! You
wanted to get even with me and you have done
it."
''But what did do?''
Never you mind! Let your own con-
science answer! I'm going down town, and if
shouldn't return to the house YOU can COM
municate with any lawyer you see it'