davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-07-15
THE SEAL AS A BIRD.
Why Uncle Jerry Appointed an orni holo-
gist on the Commission.


gist on the Commission.
New York Advertiser.l
1t is evident that the Bering Sea difficulty
will not be definitely settled until it is
officially declared what a seal really is. 1t
scientifically asserted, and generally ac-
cepted, that the seal is ''an aquatic car
nivorous mammal;" but so is yachtsman
'for that matter, and during the seaside
season even the lovely summer girl' would
come within the definition.
But Uncle Jerry Rusk, advanced from an
agriculturist to be meteorologist now
assumes to be an ornithologist, and makes
public his belief that the seal is bird. The
assumption that he does SO verify believe is
based upon his securing the appointment of
Prof. c. Hart Merriam, the young but able
ornithologist of the Agricultural Depart
ment to be one of the two American COM
missioners to examine into the condition of
the seal fisheries in the Bering Sea.
Prof. Merriam is now somewhere in the
region of the great Colorado Desert, where,
If he encounters some of the recent TO-
mancers in that region, the official orni-
thologist will see some very queer birds, and
Uncle Jerry has been endeavoring to reach
him by telegraph, by mail and by messengers
to notify him that he must turn his orni-
theological studies to the species vulgarly
known as seals, and must turn his steps
toward Alaska.
The belief OF Uncle jeremiah that the seal
is bird, is undoubtedly based upon an in
States, which certainly does display upon
its face q terrific specimen Of ornithology
in the shape of a spread eagle glaring at the
sun and bearing in his clutched talons the
emblems of war as well as peace. But this
noble bird, which is q seal, will remain in
the State Department and will not be trans
ferred to the keeping of agricultural, metero-
logical and ornithological Uncle Jeremiah.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-07-15
Grating Horns on a Rooster.

Hon. 7. ]. Younger, of Osceola, No. once q
prominent member of the Missouri Legisla-
ture, and who is best known by his full
name, Thomas Jefferson Younger, tells this
story in the st. Louis Republic: "Some
months ago l saw statement in a St. Louis
newspaper about a rooster with spur on
his head that seemed to be attracting con-
siderable attention. This apparent freak of
nature can be accomplished by a simple
surgical operation. Take a young rooster.
When his spur is only bud, make an in
cisfon around the spur; then, with the point
of the knife, lift the spur off, taking with it
the cartilaginous formation: next make an
incisiop on the head, or any other place
where the bone can be reached, place the
spur therein, close up tightly the cuticle
around the spur with a few stitches and
keep the chicken enclosed until the graft or
spur has healed and adhesion has taken
place. The spur will then be as solid as
though nature had caused it to grow there
and 1t will continue its normal growth. The
young spur or the germ of a spur can be
grated either on the head or on the foot by
the same process, which is similar to the
grating of budding peaches. Squire Berry,
of near johnson City, st. Clair county, is an
expert at that business and while scientific
men may experiment in that direction, If
they desire. we stand ready to demonstrate
it as fact"
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-07-15
VERY ENCOURAGING REPORTS
Read at the Monthly Meeting of the Ale
gneny w, C. T, q. YESTERDAY.


gneny w. c. T. o. Yesterday.
The monthly meeting of the Allegheny
County w. C. T. U. was held yesterday after
noon in the Smithfield Street Church. The
attendance was small. Mrs. j. S. Porter
presided and Mrs. Rhodes conducted the de-
votional exercises. Mrs. Porter offered
prayer in behalf of a man whom she had in
duced to sign the pledge and whom she be-
lfeved was earnest in his efforts to reform
Miss Martha Mcconnell, Treasurer, reported
balance of $50 Is in the treasury. Twenty
six dollars and twenty-eight cents had been
expended during the last month. The
sum of 81 o. had thus far been
received in support of the Worlds
Was I to hoG Fss0Htoa h shs
for a month more so that it might possibly
be increased. Mrs. Porter stated that there
were six new unions organized since the
meeting in last September One of these had
been recently instituted at Sharpsburg, hav-
ing II members. Mrs. E. S. Law is its Presi-
dent
Mrs. Rhodes made an address appealing to
the meeting to take some action with refer
ence to the protection OF young girls who are
erty or orphanage. Action on this
appeal will probably be taken at the
next meeting. A petition was read from
the union at Bellevue, asking that the W. C.
T. Q. place itself on record as opposed to the
opening of the Worlds Fair on Sunday, and
that a committee be appointed to visit the
different churches of the city and county
and have them denounce the opening of the
fair on Sunday. The meeting had already
pronounced itself in regard to the first part
of the petition, but in conformity to the lat
ter part committee consisting of Mrs.
Atchison, Mrs. Irwin and Mrs David Nc
Allister were appointed. Reports from sew
eral unions were read, showing the unions to
be working successfully.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-07-15
PREMONITION OF DANGER.
A New York Drummer Who Escaped the
Ravenna Disaster Tells . Story-A His
torical United States FIag-Some Short
Slrat,haa nm O Variety of SubiecfS

A New York Drummer Who Escaped the
Ravenna Disaster Tells . Story-A His
torical United States FIag-Some Short
Sketches on Variety of Subjects.
"I have been on the road ever since at
tanned manhood" said George Bailey, a
New York travelling man, to Detroit Free
Press reporter, "and 1 am as free from
superstition as any one 1 ever knew. cover
the country pretty thoroughly every year,
journey from New York to the Pacific coast
and from Duluth to Galveston. without a
thought that the train may run Off the track
or collide with another, and yet for a week
prior to the recent frightful accident at
Ravenna, o., whereby there was such ter
rible loss of life, l was as nervous and full
of vague, underlined apprehension as L could
be, was working along the line of the n.
Y, P. & o. Railroad down in Ohio during
that time, and several times remarked to
my chum, Tom. something's going to
happen; there's going to be an accident, and
am booked to be in it, or just escape it,
"Tom, who is an unsentimental fellow,
would gruffly respond, o, pshaw, you're rat
prescription would do me no good, and the
day of the accident Tom and 1 started for
the ill-fated train that bore so many poor
mortals to their fate at Ravenna. At the
station a telegram was handed me request
ing that go to Cleveland and there meet q
member Of the firm p! represent. said
goodby to Tom, turned back and In two
hours later was on my way to Cleveland:
The next morning l. of course, read the full
particulars of the accident at Ravenna, and
until late in the afternoon supposed that my
chum was among the killed. Luckily, he
escaped without injury, and when he next
saw me two or three days later, the first
words he uttered were: If you ever have
another presentiment or foreboding of ap-
preaching disaster, George, I'll listen to you,
and anchor myself in some hotel until the
storm blows over. 1 laughed at you the
other day, but wished 1 hadn't the minute
] realized the predicament we were in at
RayennaD
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-07-15
A n1ANDAMUs WANTED.

A very interesting suggestion was made
public yesterday Gy those whose indepen-
dent spirit causes them to imperatively de-
mand partisan judiciary. 1t is to the
effect that bill in equity shall be filed
asking for mandamus on the Republican
County Committee to make it issue call
for judicial convention.
The device is certainly attractive for its
original application of the theory that a
suit in equity is a panacea for all the
political ills that flesh is heir to. Only one
amendment can be suggested to the prop
osition, which we hope the orators will
adopt as The DISPATCH suggests.
Let them file their bill in Common Pleas
No. 8. The judges of that court are In a
position to give prompt attention to ap-
plications of that sort.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-07-15
IT WAS A SURE SIGN.
A Learned Astronomer Gets a Few Points
From a Countryman.

From Countryman.
Harper's Young People.]
A very learned professor of astronomy
one who was skilled in the signs of the skies
and the winds and the clouds-was once
travelling. While on his journey he lost his
way, and, wandering about, came across a
simple looking countryman, who was sitting
under tree tending d flock of sheep.
"Friend,' said the professor, ''ran you in
form me of the direction and distance Of the
nearest adjacent town."
Now the countryman perceived that the
professor was very wise, from the long words
he used; but he presently managed to under
stand him and replied:
eyes, sir; it is all of five miles; but" he
added, "you will get O good wetting before
you get there"
This surprised the professor. He could
not discover any signs of q storm, and he
was so sure of his own knowledge in such
matters that he laughed at the countryman,
and started his horse on the road pointed
out to him.
But before he had gone two-thirds of the
distance sudden black cloud covered the
sky, the rain poured in torrents, and the
wise man reached his inn soaked and dis
gusted.
The next morning; before he had proceed
ed on his journey, he determined to ride
back, and if possible, find out by what hid
den signs-of which he, Il great professor,
was ignorant-this foolish countryman had
foretold the storm.
So he rode back, and after spending day
in the search, tound the countryman, and
explained what he wanted to know.
Il will not tell you my sign," said the coun-
tryman, without good sum of money"
They struck a bargain. The professor was
so anxious to hear this valuable secret that
he willingly paid the large amount de-
manded.
'Do you see, sir, asked the countryman,
"that black sheep with a white face over
there-the only black sheep in my fock?"
The professor said he did.
"Well, sir" said the countryman "when 1t
is the fairest day In June, and when there is
not cloud in the sky, L surely know it is
going to rain IL l chance to see that old
sheep caper around, with her tail held
straight up in the airI''
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-07-15
IN THE 400 AND OUT.

Mrs. WILLIAM WALDORF ASToR is one
| of the finest mandolin players in New York's
| 400.
| to purchase the Newport home of the late
| George Bancroft.
EX-GOVERNOR BIGGs, of Delaware, and
his two sons expect to sell 10000 baskets of
peaches this year.
TENNYsoN was once asked to supply a
| dozen birthday poems of eight lines each
for 1000 guineas. The poet refused.
HENRY HILTON has fine collection of
fancy and colored diamonds, numbering
nearly 100 stones, in brown, yellow and
pink.
MRS. THOMAS A. EDIsoN'S oldest
daughter is a brilliant performer on the
piano. She is now in Germany under rare
musical tuition.
GENERAL ANsoN G. Cook, Secretary of
the United States Senate, is strongly-built
man, about 80 years of age, and has dark
hair mustache and eyes. He is one of the
most agreeable and popular men in Wash
ington.
THE property left by the late Sir Richard
Sutton, owner of the Genesta, is estimated
at over f7,OO00OO The heir to the estate is a
pOSUnunOuS cnliu only JUST DOrls anu Dy the
time he becomes of age the fortune will be
among the very greatest.
YOUNG James G. Blaine Is getting the
reputation of being one of the best dressed
men in Washington. He displays a London
wardrobe of irreproachable taste, and espe-
cially affects neat morning suits of gray.
In his button-hole he wears bunch of sweet
peas.
MINISTER FRED DOUGLASS has a hand
some home in Anacostia, pretty suburb of
Washington, aud he says he would much
rather live there than in Haiti Thomas p.
Fortune, the colored newspaper writer, is
said to be anxious to Try his fortune IN
Haiti.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-07-15
CAMPBELL IN THE LEAD.

Though Governor Campbell has the re.
nomination in his hands, there is pros
pect Of sharp fighting in the Democratic
convention to-day. Mr.. Neal is evidently
not inclined to retire without a struggle,
and perhaps he may obtain support from
quarters which have been counted till now
for Campbell The forecast in our news
columns to-day, however, indicates that
Mr.. Campbell has a firm hold
on enough delegates to elect him, if not on
the first ballot, pretty soon after. The
only other new phase in the situation is
involved in the proposal to push the silver
question to the front with special plank
in the platform. But whether the Demo-
Gratis of Ohio declare for free coinage or
not the.main issue must be Protection.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-07-15
The Cause of Old Maids,

A professor at Ann Arbor, Mich, was dis
cussing the process of fertilizing plants by
means of insects carrying the pollen from
one plant to another, says an exchange, and
to amuse them told how old maids were the
ultimate cause of it all. The humble bees
carry the pollen, the fed mice eat the
humble bees, therefore the more field mice
the fewer humble bees and the less pollen
and variation of plants. But cats devour
field mice and old maids protect cats. There
fewer field mice the more bees. Hence old
maids are the cause of variety in plants.
Thereupon a sophomore with a single eye
glass, an English umbrella,a box coat, with
his trousers rolled up at the bottom, arose
and asked:
Il s-a-ay, professah, what is the cause-ah
of old maids, don't you know?"
Perhaps Miss Jones can tell you," sug-
gested the professor.
''Dudes!'' said Miss Jones sharply, and
without moments hesitation.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-07-15
CANDoIT MORE CHEaPI,y.

The report that the expenses of the exec
utive department of Connecticut's govern
ment under General Bulkeley are paid by
an insurance corporation of that State
moves the New York EUeninq Sun to some
reflections on the power of corporations to
run government 1t draws a picture of
possible time 'when a combination of
corporations shall1ind it to their interest to
supply the sinews to an administration re-
pudiated by the people"
We should say that the first thought in
connection with such a report should be
that an insurance company taking the
course referred TO would be an eminent
subject for the avoidance of insurers and
investigation on the part of shareholders
by criminal process. Not even the broad
est theories of insurance management can
regard an investment in a State govern
ment as proper one for insurance trust
funds, and if the reports referred to are
correct the officers of the insurance com
pany in question are eligible candidates
for the penitentiary. Which fact permits
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-07-15
AN HONOR CONTESTED.

California Claims to Have First Produced
As You Like 1t in Arcadia.
New York Telegram.l
Various items in the English papers claim
ing for Lady Colin Campbell the credit OF
giving an out of door performance Of GAS
You Like 1t" for the first time has caused
considerable comment in this city among
actors and managers 1t is alleged that the
first performance was given in 1884. Yester-
day AL Hayman, the San Francisco theat-
rical manager, said:
1.-THE English papers are all wrong. The
people on the Pacific coast claim the honor
OF originating that idea. 1t was in 1882 when
the Bohemian Club gave its first out of door
performance. GAS You Like IT. was the
piece, and Joseph r. Grismer, the actor, had
charge OF it. Tho piece was given on the
Russian river, and was one of the most sue
cessful things of its kind ever seen. The
English papers copied a description Of the
performance, and imagine 1t was in that
way that Lady Colin Campbell heard of it !"
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-07-15
NOT UP TO THE STANDARD.
A Dude at q Recent New York Fire Re-
ceives a Reprimand.

Dude at q Recent New York Fire Re-
ceives a Reprimand.
New York Adyertiser.l
Among the crowd watching the f1remen at
work on the burning Sixth avenue car
stables last Wednesday stood O young swell.
"Why are those f1remen taking it easy upon
the roof instead of going to work?' he
growled.
AS his remark seemed to be addressed to
no one in particular, a little boy with bare
feet and a very dirty face, volunteered the
information that the firemen referred to
were not "taking it easy" but had crawled
out Of the smoke for breath of fresh air.
"Dey couldn't live, boss, if dey stayed in
dere right long" he said.
wv ait until you are spoken to-" said the
dandified young man, at the same time tap
ping the boy on the shins with q cane he
carried. The little fellow knew his brown
fist was no match for the heavy headed
walking stick and said nothing, but the light
in his bright young eyes spoke volumes.
In q brief space of time the young man
had forgotten all about the occurrence and
again spoke aloud, this time addressing his
side: I'm glad I'm not a fireman.
couldn't be one, don't you know; 1 really
couldn't"
Immediately the thin voice of the small
boy replied: "Naw, yer couldn't They
only has brave fellers in the fire depart
ment, am q feller of yer size as would hit
little un like me amt no good, seer" At this
outburst the pretty young lady turned q
rosy red, and her escort evidently wished
her many miles away as he fondled his cane
and glared at the grinnfng face of the retreat
ing boy.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-07-15
A CITY UNDER GROUND.
Rare Antiquarian Discoveries Made in Far
Away Bokhara-

Away Bokhara.
In the rightbank of the river Amoo-Daria
near the town of Karki in Bokhara, grottos
have been found among the hills leading to
subterranean city, the evidence of which
dates back into antiquity, according to re-
cent Russian advices. Silver coins and in
scriptions of the time of Gapora I. (the first
Persian King of the Gassanidean dynasty,
who lived about 200 years B. c. were found
in the place. The subterranean town
stretches over a distance of more than three
versts (about a half mile) with streets,
lanes, squares, and hanging fountains. In
some places the ground on the top has
caved in; but the largest part of the city can
be passed through without the least diff
Guilty. By the light of the miners lamp, the
place presents quaint, fantastic appear
ance.
There are houses in perfect construction,
one or two stories high, with q pretence Of
architectural elegance, and filed with
furniture and various domestic utensils.
The ceilings or upper covering of the streets
are constructed of blocks of alaoaster gran
ties. The natives of Bokhara knew Of the
silver and gold coins, ornaments and uten-
sils of great intrinsic value and of still
greater archaeological Importance. The
Russian authorities of Bokhara have made
arrangements to take care of the antiquities
of the place, and sent notices of its discoy-
cry to the Archaeological Society of Moscow,
The society has sent a commission of ex-
perts to make explorations during the
summer
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-07-15
NO MORE AGITATION,
Fenians Meet and Advise Organization
Upon a Military Basis.

remains meet ana AOV1Se ORGANIZATION
Upon q Military Basis.
ESPECIAL TELEGRAM TO THE pIsPATCH,l
New YORK, July IA meeting of the old
Fenian Brotherhood was held in this city to-
day, representatives being present from
Boston, Philadelphia, Paterson and several
other cities. An official report from Ireland
was among the documents read and consid-
cred The following is an extract:
Gas to the intention of h-Americans
with regard to Ireland. we entirely dissent
from the views expressed in your last letter,
viz: that the Irish people at home should
dictate the policy. The Irish in Ireland
must not be left to follow their own views
or rather the views of a band of selfseeking
agitatators called leaders American gold
has corrnpted them and made them nearly
all Constitutionalists, whether Parnellites or
anti-Parnellites; and now on the Irish
Americans rests the responsibility of
directing a more manly and national
policy in the struggle for Irish inde-
pendence. The only organization that
Should now be considered is one with
a military basis-no more vigorous agi-
tation, which is always corrupting, and
brings a low worthless, self-seeking class of
men to the front. The Parnellites are no
better than the Wings and West Britains of
the Mccarthy party"
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1891-07-15
LAUGHING WATER.

"What do you suppose Thompson did
when the nat he lives In caught a-fre the other
dayP''
''Sent in an alarm?''
mo; he became wildly excited, apparently, and
threw his wffes pug out of the third-story window
Killed the brute of course; and now she Is WONDER
ing If Thompson didn't know just what he was
doing all the time. ''-Ea Indianapolis Journal.
As he sailed across the tide
Foolishly he tied the sail
To the railing at the side,
And was sdled DER the rail.
When he landed in the sea,
Where, though he could see the land.
He was stranded 'mong the fishes
Till they fshed him from the strand.
-Ee1o York Herald.
weldon-'fYou a church member? You
surprise mel I've know you for a dozen years, and
never should have suspected it,
Raredon-''My friend you don't expect a man
to bring his religion with him when he comes here
on Change. do you?''-Chiea0o Tribune.
"Have you Watts on the Mind?' asked
South Second street girl of the intelligent clerk.
ssNo miss ~ replied the intelligent clerk, but
1 have warts on the knuckles, If you'd Ike to
some. ''-Bruoklyu Eagle.
Gertrude refused Tom four times before
she married him, - said girl to her friend at the
seaside
..Ah, Isee. 1t was case Of well shaken before
taken. ~ Washington Post.
Harry came in from his play roaring like
a little bull of Bashan. He cries so often and so
easily that little anxiety is felt when he is heard
screeching his hardest On this occasion his
mother said:
''Well, we'll Harry, what nowG'
''Oh, have skint my knee"
''Skint ID, Harry7''
''Oh, yes yes! L walking along and fell
down, and when got up my knee was all skun upl
Just see how It is skinded. ''-Tble1o Blade.
Peace fills the man who richly reaps
And with plenty is content.
And likewise, too. the tramp who sleeps
And doesn't care to earn a cent
-Chicu0o Herald.
Kind-hearted employer-Mr. Grubber,
wouldn't you like to go and spend q vacation ofa
week or two at some summer hotel in the countryf
Overworked employe-Mr. Pushem, this comes
30 Unexpectedly that-that-couIdn't you send One
of the other boys2-Chica0o Tribune.