davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03
HUMOROUS.

l. WOCu OTluS anu US"1MTS.
Laffagen-"Reaching after the unat-
tainable, dear?" Mr.. Laffagen-'It
appears so. I can't seem to reach the
end of the broken suspender under the
back of my waistcoat.'
-''What is the matter with me, doc
tor?" the patient asked in despairing
tone. Matter with you, man?'' was
the doctors cherry reply. Matter with
you, do you say? Why, man, you're
sick. ''-Somerville Journal.
The country boy cried to the boy from
"Don't you envy my health and my skin
brown?
get tanned by the sun as through meadow
IrOam,
And also by mother when get home"
Washington Post.
His Choice.-Proud Father (show-
ing off his boy before company)-''My
son, which would you rather be, Shake
speare or Edison?' Little Son latter
meditation)-"I'd rather be Edison"
Fond Father-s'Yes? 1Vhy?" Little Son
-"Cause he amt dead
Not Her Fault MARY" said her
mother, you'll have to make that Mr..
Golosh leave earlier Its not nv
fault. mamma" Not your fault?
Didn't hear you last night at the front
door say: Stop Edward half dozen
times? If he wanted to go, why did
you want to stop him.
"A Surprise. Widower Ito his daugh-
ter, aged ten)-"Dora, do you know
that Susanna, our housekeeper, is going
to be married?' Dora-'Oh, I'm so
glad we are getting rid Of the old peli-
can Won't it be jolly! But who is go
ing to marry herr" Father-''Well, 1
amr'-Mainzer Tageblatt.
"A Thoughtful Spouse.-"I've a
great notion to go and jump into the
| river" said Mr.. n. Peck at the end of a
little domestic discussion. as he picked
| up his hat and started out. ''You come
! right back here said his wife. IF
you intend any such tricks as that, just
| march upstairs and put on your old
| clothes before you start. "-Indianapo-
| lis Journal.
Let Him Down Easy.-''We1l, did
| you get the money from Short?" ''No, :
answered the collector, but he made
| his refusal pleasanter than / expected
pleasant! What do you mean?'
''Why, he was careful enough to have a
nice thick rug on the floor, SO that when
he threw me down stairs fell on the
rug, and didn't break my neck, as he
intended. "-Philadelphia Times.
| The other day a visitor entered the
public library and passed some time il
looking at the list of new books. Their
he went to the counter and in few
moments the librarian stepped along te
| attend his wants. Some time wa:
passed in inquiring about the --latest
publications, when he suddenly asked
"Have you any late books by Charlie:
Dickens?"-Bangor Commercial
tine of Us.-Miss OldInayde-'FYol
wretched man, how could you breal
into my house at midnight and carry
sway all the silver we have cherished
In the family for SO many years?'
Burglar you see, mum, I'm col
lectiI' souvenir spoons Miss Old
mayde-''Let him go, officer, RICH
away! And SO you, too. are collecting
spoons, my man? That puts differen
aspect on affairs Yam something of
spoon enthusiast myself. "-Somervill
| Journal
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03
UTILITY OF THE TELEPHONE.
The Vast Amount of Labor and Expense II
Saves,

The Vast Amount of Labor and Expense 1t
Saves.
A vivid idea of the extent to which
the telephone takes the place of the
''errand boy of our forefathers was
given few days ago in Boston, says
the Chicago News, when the represent
alive of the New England Telephone
Co. stated before a legislative COM
mittee that the messages it handled
would require the employment of ten
thousand messenger boys if they had to
be carried through the streets instead
Of over the wire. The average use of
telephone by the man in whose Office it
hangs and by his friends who don't pay
anything for its use and who rail at the
telephone monopoly" in good set terms
is from six to twelve messages day,
Hence in a city like New York with
nine or ten thousand subscribers the
number Of telephone messages will run
up some days to seventy-five thousand.
If ten of these were gwen to one boy as
his days work. as letters or kilograms
for delivery, this would figure out not
less than seventy-fve hundred boys on
active service. Thus it will be seen
that the telephone man was not at all
wide of the mark in his figures, and
any interruption of telephone commu-
nication is now felt acutely in the sharp
tax that it at once puts ON the district
messenger system. which still remains
an absolute necessity for many pur-
poses, and is every year put to some
new work. The absence of it is one of
the first things that strikes an Ameri-
can in London, and it puzzles him to
understand the grounds on which it can
be objected to. as it lately has been by
the British r-general.-Chica-
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03

political organization that ever ext sted
in the country, and will continue to live
and flourish as long as the republic
lives. Can democrats desert such a
party with such a wonderful record, and
become members of political Organi-
zation that can never have nation al
existence or commendable plank in
its platform that has not been taken
from the platform of the party they
| now desert?"
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03
Musical Normal-Date and Place.


Prof. Henry Newton's musical insti
tute will begin at the Great Bend Nj.
E. church, Monday evening, Sept. It'll,
at O'Clock. The first night will be
free to everybody. Prof. n. will work
at this place, together with Larned,
three nights at each point, alternating
between the two places until he has
given each city twenty lessons includ-
ing concert at the close of the term.
The tuition fee for adults is 81 for the
twenty lessons-OnlY ten cents lesson,
all given in the evening. There will
be juvenile class for children from
the age of thirteen to six, taught after
4 o'clock, after school hours, twenty
lessons for so cents. No tickets are
transferable; no one shall be admitted
to evening class on juvenile class
ticket. No ticket shall be sold for
part of the course for less than the
price of full course. All tickets must
be paid for at the first meeting of the
class Monday evening. Sept. ~ except
that tuition tickets Tor cnlluren CLASS
may be paid for on the following after
noon. Parents purchasing adults class
tickets at 50 shall be allowed to send
all their own children under thirteen
years of age to afternoon class free.
The institute will meet on the eve
nirgs of Monday Tuesday and Wednes-
day of each week until twenty lessons
are given. The first two weeks session
will be held in the M. E. church, the
next two in the Presbyterian, and the
next two in the Congregational church.
The last two lessons of the course will
be rehersals for the concert, in the
hall where. concert is to occur. The
place for holding concert will be an
nouDced in due time.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03
A CLEVER ATTORNEY.
low He Secured Acquittal for H
Client Ageinst-Creat Odds.

Row He Secured an Acquittal Tor HIS
Client Ageinst-Great Odds.
In trial in the United States court
! where a young man had been indicted
for passing a counterfeit ten-dollar bill.
the counsel of the latter, c. A Baldwin,
objected to Gen Stricllland'S course in
endeavoring to prove by business men
the fact that the bill in question was a
counterfeit, but to no purpose Finally,
improving favorable chance, Mr..
Baldwin substituted good bill for the
counterfeit, which genuine money Gen.
Strickland then proved by three bust
ness men to be the rankest kind of
counterfeit. Thereupon Mr.. Baldwin
vehemently demanded that attention be
given to his objections. and Judge
Dundy insisted that the district attor-
ney send out for bank cashier and an
expert. With great confidence Gen.
Strickland handed the expert the bill
after esta blishing his business and his
experience in handling money-and
said:
estate to the jury whether in your
opinion that bill is good or bad"
''That is a good bill, SIR" returned
the witness
''What,'' shouted the attorney" ''do
you mean to say that bill is not a coun-
terfeit?''
Eyes, sir; if you will bring it down to
the Omaha National bank, we will give
you the gold for it,
Then there was scene, in the midst
Of which Mr.. Baldwin managed to eX-
plain to the court that he had changed
bills without the knowledge of the dis
trict attorney, and that, in view of the
fact that three good business men had
testified that genuine bill was coun-
terfeit, he thought considerable allow
ance should be made for his client-an
ignorant country boy-in installing a
counterfeit for good bill. The jury
were evidently impressed with the idea,
for they returned verdict of acquittal.
Omaha Bee.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03
CENTRAL COMMITTEE MEETING.

A meeting of the Democratic County
Central Committee of Barton County
Kansas, is hereby called, to meet in the
parlors of the Grand Central Hotel
Great Bend, on Saturday, September
18th, at 1000 O'Clock a. M, for the pur
pose Of calling a convention to put in
nomination candidates for county OH
GERS.
FRED ZUTAvERN, Chairman
WILL f. STOKE, Secretary.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03
Better Late Than Never.

Through the latticed window came
the soft droning of countless insects, as
Merriam, trilling slowly, rose from the
piano stool and gazed YEARLY across
the intervening marsh that separated
her fathers ancestral hall from Hobo
ken proper.
''Why does he not Gomez" she NUT
tered. For three long years 1 have
waited"
just then a step was heard on the
gravel outside and young mans face
appeared in the door. With glad cry,
Merriam sprang into his arms.
AT last.' she sobbed- MY darling,
why have you delayed so 4ong?"
Gently smoothing back the tresses
from the pure young face upturned to
his, he replied.
do not agitate yourself, my darling
merely stopped to sew on a button
jury.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03

The NJ. E. people raised in cash and
subscription the neat sum of 81, 900,
on last Sunday, with which to pay
off the Indebtedness on their church
in this city. If they can collect that
amount, and also the money that was
subscribed when the church was first
built, but never paid, the church will
be we'll fixed. Money can be paid to
Frank Z Smith, treasurer, or to F.V.
Russell.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03

Jindrak Bros the cigar manufact-
urers of this city, are having a big
trade now, and have found it necessary
to employ more help. They have an
immense supply of the finest tobaccos,
and make the best pure Havana fill
er five cent cigar to be had in the
west. They are prepared to supply
all demand.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03

Geo. Hastings, the man who drove
off with Mr.. Philburn's team about
the beginlng of harvest, and forgot to
come back until called for, was last
week sentenced to two years in the
pen, and was taken down to his new
place of abode by Sheriff Wilson last
Thursday.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03

NOT OUTSTANDING President Hall
was defeated in the Missouri state ALI
aEce meeting last week, by the sub
treasury and land and loan advocates,
the platform adopted does not contain
the sub-treasury and land and loan
planks, but is virtually the st. Louis
platform. The better those objection
able demands are becoming known the
less popular they are with alliance
men.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03

Down in Chilli the insurgents, who,
by the way, have the sympathy of most
Americans, say that Balmaceda is a
''Ch1li old mark" and they propose to
run him out of the country. To use
another AmeriRnism, Balmaceda, the
despot, will soon be mot in it.''
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03

Scratching in wheat is not SD popu-
lar with many Barton county farmers
as it once was. Thorough blowing a
little oftener will be done by all who
can get wheat in that way, and the
prevailing opinion is that such method
will be we'll rewarded by improvement
in yield and quality.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03
COUNTY TREASURER'S
LIST OF LANDS AND TOWN LOTS
FOR DEED DECEMBER %. 1881.
OFFICE OF COUNTY TREASURES.
Great Bend, !
Barton Co, Kansas,
Tne 0S-1, 12G1

Great Bend.
Barton Co, Kansas
July 2Sfh. 1891
NOTICE is hereby given that the following is a
list of the lands and town lots situated in Bar
ton county Kansas sold at the Delinquent Tax Sale
November 2sd, 1885, and unrececmed at this date:
and described as on the tax roofs, giving the
OF persons to whom assessed if any. and the
of taxes charged and Interest calculated the last
day of redemption due each parcel; unless these
lands and lots be redeemed from such sale OF
before December 2S 1881, the viii be duly
conveyed to the purchasers.
Redding, neqr s "a, IL, X b. s5I Sc
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03
LODGE 127. A. o. U. W., RESOLUTIONS
OF COINCIDENCE.

WHEREAS, The Supreme Master
workman of the universe in His infinite
wisdom has seen fit to take unto him
self the beloved son OF, our Esteemed
Brother G.. w. Buckland, therefore be it
Resolved, That while our sympathy
cannot mitigate the sorrow which time
alone can heal, we nevertheless extend
to our bereaved Brother, his wife and
family our heartfelt sympathy in this
their great affection and bereavement.
Resolved, That these resolutions be
spread on the minutes of the lodge, a
copy to be furnished to Brother G. w:
auckland, and to the city papers.
G. NJ. SMITH,
Committee a. J. SMITH,
GEO. CKUMMACK.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03

a. S. Houck's drug store has are
lamp No. 3-put in Monday. Yet
there is more to follow.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03
A Sad Death.

DIED AT the home of his parents in
Great Bend. Sept. !, 1891. EDWARD t.
auckland, Oldest son of Mr.. and Mrs.
G. w. auckland, aged Is years and IL
days.
The sudden and unexpected death OF
this estimable young man caused feel
ing of sadness to enter the hearts of all
our citizens who had the pleasure of
knowing him. Eddie was born in
Buffalo, n. Y, Aug. IA, 1873, and
removed to Great Bend with his pa
rents some years ago. He was always
close student, thorough and earnest
in all he undertook to do. He gradua-
ted from the Great Bend high schools
with the class of 1890, being, we think,
the youngest of his class, and deporting
himself in a manner that showed he
possessed an unusually bright mind,
and all the essential qualities to make
a successful man. He was an earnest
of the Presbyterian church, and always
willing and anxious to do his christian
duty. After graduating, he entered
the DEMOCRAT Office as a cOmpOsitOr,
and we have never known of more
faithful and scrupulOus boy than he
proved himself to be-. On the 10th of
August he commenced work in the
Farmers and Merchants bank, and had
great hopes of acquiring thorough bus
mess training.
He was taken with typhoid fever, and
after an illness of less than two weeks,
which he bore with manly fortitude, he
suffered cohgestive chill and in its
cold and relentless grasp he passed tc
brighter world, leaving behind him
an example that it would be well for
all young boys to follow.
Funeral services will be held today
Thursday-at p. M, from the Pres
byterian church, and will be attended
by large host of sincere friends who
regret deeply that such young life of
promise should be thus suddenly cut
short.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03

Just received, a car load of
O'Brien wagons; also Birdsell
and Odds wagons. Call and
see them at the Great Bend
Implement Co.
Children Cry for
Pitchers CaetoFta.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03
The NJ. E. people raised in cash a

The first agricultural exhibition
was held at Georgetown, D. c.. in 1910.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03

q " Buckiand AV Co I'D e hf 81 % 80
i.eizer & Brinkman Heller Ad all % I25 90
l.. NJ kRAUSE, Treasurer,
Barton County, Kansas.
by T. II. MILLER Deputy
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03
Castoria.

"Castoria is an excellent medicine for chill
dren. Mothers have repeatedly told me Of its
good effect upon their children"
DR. G. G. OsGooD,
Lowell Mass.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03
CASH MARKET.

Corrected to p. M. Wednesday, Aug.
10. 1891.
CHICAGO-wHEAT, No =, Sl-o4; CosS, &c
OATS So
KANSAS CfTY-MHEAT, No. =. 90.
GREAT BEND-BUTTER, TO 1Oc: Fees 1Ocs
CHICKENS, Spring $50 - per doz old hens 5to6c
per pound
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03

"Castoria is the best remedy for children OF
which 1 am acquainted hope the day is not
far distant when mothers viii consider the real
interest of their children, and use Castoria in
stead of the various quack nostrums which are
destroying their loved ones, by forcing opium,
morphine, soothing syrup and other hurtful
agents down their throats, thereby sending
them to premature graves"
Dr.. j. z. kINCHELoE,
Conway, Ark
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03
CaStoria.

The Company, Street. New York City
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1891-09-03

Gus ana DufUonSOme ACCUMULATION OF
surplus in their hands for their use?
There are no other palnks in the peO-
pies party worthy of the name that is
not substantially democratic, and the
democrat who now deserts his party
and joins the so-called peoples party''
can only do so for the benefit he expects
to receive from the two planks above
mentioned. He must repudiate, or be
wholly unmindful of the continued bat
tie made in and out Of congress by
democratic statesmen during the last
twenty years against the criminal legis-
lation of the republican party and in
favor of those very principles under
which the peoples party now claim that
relief will come.
IF they are honest in their professed
dislike to high protective tariff and
politically opposed to high tariff states
men why do they place a gubernatoria!
ticket in the field in Ohio, thereby i'm
proving the chances fer election of the
author of the Mckinley tariff law at
least 15 per cent? There are but two
horns to their dilemma, one their igno-
rance of the impetus the election of
Mckinley would give to protection, or
else they are guided by the republican
friends Of Mckinley in some mysterious
way. The resources and wealth of the
manufacturers are vast and concen-
trated. They will willingly divide with
any party or parties which will aid
them in their support of protection.
1.-The democrat party has seen the
birth. the life and the death of every
Morning journal and courier., 1891-04-27

The city is full of prominent Americans. Among those now here are E. J. Mason, a Harvard trustee, and Mrs. Pierpont Nor gan.
Morning journal and courier., 1891-04-27
TALMAGE,s TABERNACLE.

Brooklyn's New Place of Worship,
 Dedicated-The Dedfcatory Sermon
 Delivered by Rev. Dr. Hamin of
 Washington.
 BROOKLYN, April 26.-Rev. T. De Witt Talmage's new tabernacle at the corner of Greene and Clinton avenues was opened to his congregation and the public for the first time this morning. Three imposing dedicatory services were held during the day and thousands of people crowded the big edifice at each one.
 The tabernacle's dimensions are 200 feet long by 118 wide and it is Romanesque in it's style of architecture. It is built of brick and stone. The interior of the church has two galleries and will seat $500 persons. The big organ cost $50, ,000. Up to date the total cost of the church is SAC, 900 and it will require $40, 900 more to complete it.
 This mornings service was opened by the last congregation singing the doxology. Prayer was then offered by Rev. Dr. Has tings and the dedicatory prayer was made by Rev. Dr. Wendell Prime. Dr. Talmage then welcomed the congregation. Rev. dedicatory sermon, after which Dr. Tal- mage made another short address, speak ing of the disasters through which they had passed in the last twenty years. He said during that time over $S00,000 had been expended and $3O5, ,0OO subscribed for charitable purposes The congregation had been called upon to build three churches. Rev. Dr. Ives, the well-known debt raiser, was then introduced and made an urgent appeal to the audience for money. He called for $1 ,000 subscriptions, as it was necessary for them to raise S50,00O at once to remove the mechanics lein on the building. There were eight who sub l scribed s1 ,0O0 each, and then he called for $500 subscriptions and nine subscribed l that amount each. The total collection duriFgthe morning about was $32, 900. k Atthe afternoon and evening sessions
 almost enough more was raised to make up the required $50, ,000. There still remains
 a debt on the church of $200.
Morning journal and courier., 1891-04-27
COUNT VON MOLTKE.
The Whole Berlin Garrison to Take
 Fart in the Funcral-The Route of

The Whole Berlin Garrison to Take
 Fart in the Funcral-The Route of
 Pfocession-HOW the Body Looks.
 BERLIN, April 26.-General von Moltke was in the best of spirits on Friday even ing and reminded his niece that their supply of wine must be renewed. He mar rated the story of man who had sent him a calculation showing that the generals birthday had never fallen on Sunday and smilingly added: of I were superstitious I might believe that had seen my last birthday"
 The emperor desires that the whole Der lin garrison shall take part in the funeral. As the route to the Lehrter station is too short the coffin will be conveyed to the Silesian station. Thus the dead hero will pass the column of victory and through | the Brandenburgh Gate, where he made entries with his sovereign in 1866 and 1871. The route, which is five miles long, | will be lined with troops and veterans throughout. It is probable that the kaiser will personally command the troops. | Prince Bismarck has sent telegraphic message of condolence to the family of the dead soldier. It is not known whether the ex-chancellor will attend the funeral or not. Telegrams have been received from a majority of the German and other Euro pean sovereigns and princes.
 The body lies in coffin of yellow oak, which is placed on pedestal covered with wreathes. The head rests upon a white cushion. The classical features strongly recall the death mask of Frederick the Great in the Potsdam palace The room is draped with dark red cloth, but the associations dispel any idea of gloom. Men of all classes mingle in the chamber, many of them in tears. None of the numerous order decorations of the de- ceased have been placed upon the bier. In accordance with his own desire his only ornament is plain gold wedding ring on the right hand.
 VIENNA, April 26.-A deputation from the Austrian regiment of which General von Moltke was honorary colonel has start | ed for Berlin