Indian chieftain. [volume] (Vinita, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1882-1902, 1891-08-06

haven't had so good chance' nam
Horn.
When n man feels that his pores need
opening he will find little sage tea 10
be wise decoction. = Biaghamton
Leader.
She-"I don't believe in long en-
gagements. do youP" He-',No; peo-
pie are apt to find out too many things
about each other. "-Boston Ne10s.
college educatione Pshaw! What
good did 1t ever do young CutterP"
Lots OF goodl Why. every bali team
ia the country is after himr-Boston
Netss
These are jewels Of my own set
ting" quoth the speckled hen, as she
gathered her chickens about her. -
Buffalo Enquirer.
Your wife is in the country on her
vacation is she notPn 'My vacation,
you mean.n answered the man.-Iil-
diGnapolis Journal.
20 yes, there's skeleton in the
closet in every family. but it is so COM
mon a thing that we make no bones Of
it. Boston Transcript.
Jeanie Gus takes life easily,
doesn't hep" Jane-'I always sup
posed he did. till he tried to talk me to
death last night. Pack.
St. Peter-"No, You can't come in"
Shade of Kid--"Aw, say, don't be too
rough on a feller. wuz an Office boy
myself. ~ Y Herald
What did the ass say to Balaam.
WillieP" Come off" why do you
think that?" Because he knew
Balaam was onto him Puck,
What do you sell pound of tobac-
co for?n Cash. was the lacouic
answer. How much for poundp"
Sixteen ounces " philadelphia Iimss.
so your husband is dead. What
did he leave .you?' Il haven't in
quired. l am perfectly satisfied so
long rs he has left me. life.
Cora-"You never played baseball.
did you, JakeP" Jake-"O. yes. ~
Cora (yawning) - We'll, of course
YOU never made home run.n--M. J.
Herald.
did you speak to me when you
asked for the Billy FairPn inquired the
blonde waiter. mo. / didn't menu.
replied the saucy maiden. = BmghamtoH
Republican.
Talk about the worldly ignorance oi
girls! Why, they can no man SO
thoroughly 10 week that be will want
to 60 aud hire Sheriff o hang him. =
Washington Star.
She-"O, yesl quite believe there's
a fool In every family. Don't youPn
He-"Well-er-my opinions rather
biased. You see I'm the only member
of our family.n-Juds
Shells it better to have loved and
lost than never to have loved at all. .n
He-''fes. 1t is better for the florist,
for the jewelers.. and sometimes even
for the lawyers. " Harper's Ba&ar.
"Yes. sir" said the old gentleman TO
his son. ''if YOU want to make money
study for the legal profession. Don't
forget the old-time motto The laws
and the profits. ~ Washington Post.
How were things where you came
from9h said one business man to his
friend. "Wcll, the general condition
seemed to be long on telescopes and
short on bathing suits. Washington
Star.
Hoffman Howes-"You remember
Jack Eastman. who married Miss
Termagant last year. don't you? He's
dead.n Murray Hill--.Out of the fry
ing-pan into the fire. eh?'-Kate Fields
Washington.
"Is there no hope. doctorP" asked
the dying Congressman. mo. "
Then if must die tell the boys to
place the limit at s. and drink moth
ing but champagne on the funeral
train. n-EDoch.
Whom the Lord lovetn he
chasteneth," and it must make him
feel very tired to hear the guilty men
who are justly punished fer their sins
lay their punishment to the extreme
love of the Lord.-AtchisoR Globe.
Citizen-"I hear you are running for
ofiicea' Candidaie-"Yes. month
ago ! placed myself in the hands Of my
friends. y How are you now?" Il
would like TO borrow l5 cents to get
dairy lunch. baltimore american.
We went to the seashore in search of
health. aud when we returned we found
the office closed. The Sheriff was in
possession, but he is now occupying
our lot in the cemetery and the paper
comes out as usual.-Atiania C0HstiiH-
tiOn
You know so much. Miss Vassar.n %
said young Pert. 'rhat thought. per-
haps. you could tell me why the sea
side?" Certainly" she replied. equal
to the emergency; doubtless it was
because the sea was blue. "-Baitim0re
american.
Gabriel-"What do you think of
these religious rows on earth. ST.
Peterg ST. Peter-"O. the arguments
on both side are interesting. Tho
writings OF both parties remind me Of
the average Englishman's impressions
on America. Puck.
A.-"So you have sworn OF from
using tobaccoP" B.-"Yes, / suffered
4 good deal during the first week. but
after that felt all right What did
you take 10 allay the craving for to-
baccoP" Il took to smoking again.
That allayed the craving right orr
Iezas SJisngs.
Floor Walker-''Aiadam. NAV I in
luire why all this paraphernalia is
'pread out right Ia the way Of custom
srsS Madam (calmly)-"This is my
portable table. folding chair. alcohol
amp lunch basket and sewing bag.
have bought = spool Of thresd here.
md thought / might as we'll make
myself comfortable aud improve my
ime while waiting for my change. - 4
J. 7. Weekly.