The Anaconda standard. [volume] (Anaconda, Mont.) 1889-1970, 1890-08-02
A MISAPPREHENSION.

Adelbert Dangleboy and Gertrude Gig
e~letitter we're threading their way toward
the GiRRletitter mansion, though the
mooubathed suburbs OF the city, says the
Burlington Free Press. 1t was a soft night
in spring, and the ice cream saloon. once
more alluring its unwary victims from
among the dispensing worshipers OF
Thalia, had detained their innocent foot
steps until the great hands OF the city
clocks already Swallowed the hour OF mid
night.
Still, as the lovers turned their faces
homeward, the dreamy quiet of the night,
the witching spell of the moonlight, and
the ~fuIlness of their own hearts, with the
regions adjacent thereto, forbade unseem-
ly haste. and attuned their footsteps to q
kind Of adagio stroll, with variations
from the straight c~ourse).
At length they turned into a street SHIN
mering with long lines of unlaid water
pipes, awaiting the operations OF one OF
the city ''gangs." For a few minutes they
stopped to admire the effect Of the moon-
light on the great black cylinders, stretch
ing away until they melted into a vista of
golden mists and tool carts.
Suddenly Gertrude Gittletitter started
and grasped Adelbert's arm tightly. Adel-
bert looked up quickly. A stalwart fig
ure was walking swiftly down the avenu
toward them. breasting the moonlight as
n ships prov breasts the incoming tide.
ut is papa!n exclaimed Gertrude, with a
convulsive shudder. What shall We do?
You know he has positively forbidden our
meeting again. You must hide some
where! | will face him alone. He is so
short-sighted, i am sure he does not see
US yet. Hide, Adelbert!-here, crawl into
one of these pipes! That is ~right-thank
heaven, my darling is SAFE"
just as Adelbert Dangleboy's coat-tails
had disappeared within the long, sepul-
chral pipe the pedestrian whose rapid APP
proach had startled Inc lovers came
abreast of the trembling girl and stopped
Miss Giggletitter. What are you do.
ing here at this time of the highland
alone"
Heavensl, 1t was Richard Claw,ail, a
rival sutton!
Gertrude stammered, snickered, and
burst into tears, and sitting down OF the
pipe in which Adelbert Dangleboy was
now hopelessly entombed, buried her face
in her hands. Richard Clawtail sat down
beside her and succeeded in engaging one
of her hands. Ii was an old trick of his,
but was as far as his engagement with
Gertrude Giggletitter had now succeeded
in going.
all alone at midnight he said tenderly.
for his throat was still raw from the
effects of In grippe, "you will certainly
permit me to remain by you as your pro-
tector. or, better still, allow me to escort
you bome""
What could Gertrude Giggletitter say?
She could not give away the dear admirer
wedged fast in the water pipe. That
would be too Illuminating a triumph on the
hated rival. Neither could she in con-
sistency object to the rivals courteous
offer of protection. For she realized that
circumstances had indeed placed her in a
very compromising situation. Poor, in
nocent, u~nsuspecting lovers! How sud-
denly had tickle fortune brought them
into tight quarters-tight for Gertrude and
very, very tight for poor Adelbert!
Miss Giggletitter meditated upon the
situation for a few moments. Then-for
she felt the pipe begin to vibrate beneath
them with Adelbert Danpleboy's frantic
effort to release herself-she rose and said
sweetly: "iou are very kind, lear Mr..
Clawtail, and / shall be most happy TO
have your company as far as my home"
There was something both in the words
and tone, which may nave deceived
Richard Clawtail, and may not. At any
rete an osculatory sound-wavo went bill
lowing away into space, followed by the
nervous litter of a young female who is
accustomed TO being kissed and is fallen
into an irresistible habit of objecting to
il. At the same time n pair of shoes
appeared at the black throat of the pipe,
and a tremendous throe ran along
its huge hollow length. But Richard Claw
tail walked away with Gertrude Giggle-
litter upon his arm, seeing nothing but
the loneliness of her face and hearing
nothing but the music of her voice.
Fifteen minutes later a s~orry-looking
figure emerged from the water-pipc, and
stood upright. Not even its own mother
would have recognized il as the exquisite
Adelbert Dangleboy. Its hat was gone;
its face was livid with passion and suffo-
cation; its coat hung in tattcred folds
about its shrunken and compressed form
its rousers were shredded above the
knees, and its shoes gaped hidcously with
long kicking at the pavement.
The figure stood ir~resolute for a min
ute; then lifted its bloody fist, shook il
impotently in the moonlight, and sneaked
away into the nearest chicago
Mail.