Omaha daily bee., 1890-05-19
A CoNsOLING THOUGHT.
yam Phon Lee Will Not Contest His
Wifc's Divorce Suit.

Yam Phon Lee asserts, with tears run
ming obliquely down his checks, that he
is victim to his wife's mother, says the
New York Morning Journal.
Van Phon Lee came to America in 1878
to study our language and customs. In
studying the language he also studied
the chief users of the language-our
young ladies. He found the occupation
a very interesting one, and had advanced
to point where he could conjugate the
verb Ito love" when he was rudely in
terrupted. The emperor of China had
learned that his subjects here were
learning other things than grammer,
and he at once recalled every Chinaman
in America. Those in the business of
taking in washing or giving out dope
refused to obey the edict, for they APP
preciated the blessings of our institu-
tions. But the students, of whom there
were number, packed up their paja
mas, let down their pigtails, and re-
turned to the howery kingdom. Van
Phon Lee was one of the obedient ones,
But Yam displayed 50 much new
knowledge that he surprised the empe-
ror. The latter was particularly pleased
by u sure way to win at fan-tan which
his Americanized subject explained to
him. He at once ordered Yam Phon
Lee to return to America. Yam obeyed,
came and entered Yale college. He also
entered New Haven society.
He Whs catered to, feted lioni2ed. At
every dance he was q cOnquering hero.
Fair maidens fought for the honor of his
hand, while the male defendants of a
hundred years of successful whale fish
ing stood by in silent rage.
The German was rechristened the
Chinese, in Difference to his nationality,
and the favors were always sweet al
monds, poetic allusion to the shape of
his eyes.
Among the pretty New Haven maids
was Elizabeth Maud jerome. Van saw
her, danced with her, loved her, pro-
posed to her and married her.
Elizabeth had an $S0, 900 marriage por-
ton. Van thought himself a very lucky
man.
Alas! he had reckoned without his
host-that is, without his mother-in-law.
Yam says his mother-in-law smiled
serenely upon him at first, but then she
began to suspect that one of his eyes WAS
slanted in the direction of Elizabeth
Maud's money, and she at once became
uglier than the homelieSt dragon that
ever adorned the walls of Joss house.
Yam says that she looks so to him.
Bit by bit husband and wife were
estranged, and soon they were as far
apart as Hong Kong and New York.
Van went TO San Francisco to clerk in
a bank, but Mrs. Yam was not satisfied
there. She insisted on going home to
her mamma, and did go. Yam followed
her.
But Mamma Jerome was not pleased
with the presence of her son-in-law. She
found him once laughing uproariOusly
over mother-in-law joke in paper
supposed to be funny, and she grew
angry.
Yam then came to this city, where he
is now the editor of the Chinese Advo-
cate.
A Journal reporter called on him yes
terday at his editorial office.
Yes" said Yam, with sigh, my
wife has sued me for absolute divorce.
She says that | was unfaithful to her.
1t is not so. She was the star of my eX-
istence. But, alas! | am like many other
wretched men. | have a mother-in-law.
1t is she who is prosecuting me; it is she
who has instigated this divorce. But |
shall let the suit go by default, because,
though lose my wife by the divorce, |
also lose my mother-in-law. That is
some consolation, at least"
Henry Schoenhals, foreman Henry Krugs
Packing Co., St. Joseph, Mo. uses DR..
Thomas Electric Oil with MS men for sprains,