davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The evening world., 1890-04-29
Quite a
lFFom the Epoch.

Cumso-The editorials in the English
newspapers are not as long al they used to
be.
Fangle-Is that so?
Yes; one often sees a paragraph now as
short ~ o column and a half
The evening world., 1890-04-29
The Harmonies.

Prom the Nep York Weekly.
Inquiring Child-Mamma. why did they
make Gen. Washington's statue OF marble
and Gen. Lafayette's statue of bronze?
Mamma after some Thoughtful presume
Gen. Lafayette was u brunette.
The evening world., 1890-04-29
Honesty Is the Best Policy.

IRON the bosfon COurfer.l
Mr.. Flush-Yes. l would lend you a couple
Of dollars If l knew you.
Mr.. Ded Brock-Why, II was because you
don't know me that 1 asked you. II you
knew me you wouldn't lend 1t to me.
Mr.. .Flush-That's an honest confession.
Here IL Is.
The evening world., 1890-04-29
A Busineas Woman.

tFrom Judge.
Mabel-The mau who marries me must
have = good big bank account.
Ethel-You don't mean to say you will
marry solely for money
Mabel-No, not exactly; but II any one
sweaTs he loves. me l shall require a deposit
merely AZ an evidence OF good faith.
The evening world., 1890-04-29
A Slight Diferenoe.

lyon LiEpi1con's NdQdtfn,.
Tennyson n. Twiges-would il make any
il | should read this poem to YOU
or leave il here for You to read
The Editor-Yes: | think il would. II you
it you'll go out of the door: but If you
read 1t YOU NAV go out of the window.
The evening world., 1890-04-29
He Didn't Tell.

lfTom Hdrpsrs bdEdr.
Let me never hear Of our disobeying
me again. :" said his father. as he laid the
hair: brush aside.
II w-won't, 4" sobbed Tommy, ''ifI can
help II. I-I-didn't t-tell you t-this time"
The evening world., 1890-04-29

On the stage of the Palace Museum. in
East Fourteenth street, q very good enter
tainmenI was given hourly yesterday.
Among those whose efforts were appreciated
were Smith and Fuller. Morton. Reno and
Mack. Dalton and Watts, Rosina. Charles
Phillips, n. Mack. Annie d. Evans, Ed
Clar .nce, Tom Carr and VIM. Hickey. In
the curio halls there was plenty OF interest
ing material. The Monkey Circus aud the
illusion called "Aphrodite Rising from
the sea " claimed attention.
The evening world., 1890-04-29
Stunning.

From Harpsr's Bdrar.l
What caused Goliath to fall down 2"
He was stunned"
How"
David hit him with q stun"
The evening world., 1890-04-29
Proof Positive.

From the Ohio State Journal
Hotel Guest-Now you are sure this bed is
quite clean?
Bell Boy-Yes, sir; the sheets were only
washed this morning. Just feel EN-. they
Amt dry yet.
The evening world., 1890-04-29
HARLEM oPERA-HoUsR,

William Gillette's ~well-knoWn drama.
Held by the Enemy" began = weeks en-
gagement at Hammerstein's Harlem Opera
House last night 1t was well received and
to appeal to the audience as strongly as
ever. The drama was we'll put upon the
stage, and the cast was 3 thoroughly good
one,
The evening world., 1890-04-29
Probably Not.

IRON hs Epodh.i
Mrs. Gazzam treading the newspaper)-
Here's an article on shooting Stars"
Gazzam-Were any of them hit?
The evening world., 1890-04-29
Another NoIe Protected.

Ths case With . small trader who put all his cash
into furniture. eATpsts and general house furnish
inEs instead OF keeping his cash IA HIS business, aud
buying everything for mis- home OF the q VIPER
Hos. near Chatham square. -
The evening world., 1890-04-29
Whimsical Fancies Which Keep
Their Pens Busy.
Built That Way.
Iron Jaiae.l

Mr.. D~eakin-Yo's smokin dat butt clean
down d brush.
Mr.. C~opeck-Yo's lynn. l jess lighted dat
seegar, but nah teef sets 40 fer back | hab
Z poke HIM pretty well III { git q grip.
The evening world., 1890-04-29

SMALL size. small dose. small price, strong points
in favor OF CAnTER's LITILE LIvER PLLA. =.
The evening world., 1890-04-29
OFTEN WISHED He WAS DEAD.
OTHER BOYs AND MEN, TOO, MAY
RE AFFLICTED TnE SAME WAY.

Mr. John ~. Haas, Of this CitY, Describes
HoW lie suffered wih Cdtarrh that
Affected Al Ms Senses. aud Hoe Drs.
Copeland and mar Hare Made HIN
Sfrong and WrIt
The evening world., 1890-04-29

+" Ever since first commenced going to school I
have had trouble with my head," said Mr.. John VI.
Hans, who resides at I42 west 5Sth Vt. THIS
Trouble made me dull at school" continued MIR
Haas. II WAS slow to learn. on account ~ my poor
memory, Ihave often wondered since " the boys
and girls at school who apprar dull and stupid are
not Vhlioted with = trouble such a. I was. As I
grew older my trouble grew worse, until I thought
I could stand II no longer. There Was much about
my ttouble that was disagrreable. My nose would
he blocked ur trst on one side. then on the other.
nv eyes were weAk, and wAteted easily. There
were ringing noises in my ears, which sounded so
loud that | could not hear when any one would al.
dress me. The sounds Of q human voice came to
me indiatinctly, like the voice Of . dream, and when
the person addressing me would attract my atten.
ton by shouting or clapping me on the back I
from a dream.
The evening world., 1890-04-29
Want and Need.

" HIII III AFNNN8
Prom RaTp~Ts BlslT,
CCedTic's mother was a New Yorker, but
Cedric himself was born in BOSTON,
"CedrIc. you are a naughty boy; you
want a licking, sud she.
So, mother, returned the child. hrayCly.
II may need c-hastlsenleuL but | do NOT
The evening world., 1890-04-29

Tomorrow the lonR-delayed d" grand
opening" of Eastern Park will take place.
Rain sadly interfered with John Ward last
week. At this formal ontree Of the Brook
Ign Players Club into the baseball arena all
the pleasing and diversified attractions in-
The evening world., 1890-04-29
HARRY KEYNEDY's THEATRE.

Little Ida Heath, who has been seen here
with the Boston Howard Atheneum Star
Speciality Company, was the principal at
traction at Harry kennedy's Theatre last
night. A very good vaudeville performance
Baggesen, Ella Wesner, Harry NJ. Parker.
the VEINS Brothers and the Coyne Sisters.
Charles Mcdonald. Roach and Castleton.
L. Manning, Campbell and Nebbe.
and Harry kennedy.
The evening world., 1890-04-29

A prettier game of baseball than the
BROOKLYN National League team put up yes-
terday against the Fhillies would be diff
cult to find. Their fielding was q marvel Of
accurate throwing and a succession Of
brilliant catches and stops. BROOKLYN
cranks are banking high m tho Bride
grooms winning the National Leagne PEN
nant
The evening world., 1890-04-29

Advertisement can he left at any or the
following
AUTHORIZED OFFICES
at the Regular Advertising Rates
The evening world., 1890-04-29

The Titan Athletic Club. which has grown
to such big proportions during the past
Winter, ia on the lockout for large grounds
whereon a suitable track. clubhouse. train
~ing-quarters, and so on, Ican be built.
The evening world., 1890-04-29

The fremont Athletic Club. Of Boston.
intends to send a man to repreRent IL III tile
all-arounl amateur championship, which
occurs at Livingston. B. l.. June 10.
The evening world., 1890-04-29

It il sNdd that George La Blanche. the Ma
rine, ia seeking to cement a friendship with
Dick Roche, the ~well-known sporting. man
of st. Louis, with q view TO securing back
ing in another glove contest with Jack
Dempsey. The. Marines next engagement
il with Young Mitchell, whom he will meet
at the California Athletic Club.
The evening world., 1890-04-29

1t is quite among the possibilities that the
Dauntlens Boat Club will decide to put .
senior eight-oared crew in the Harlem
regatta as well aa a junior. There is ample
material in the Club for such q crew. and q
good deal of rowing enthusiasm IL being
manifested by the members.
The evening world., 1890-04-29

The varuna Boat Club Ia famed for the
great amount of athletic material which 1t
contains. Most of its members can hold
their own at other forms OF athletic sport
besides rowing. Their good boxers are pro-
verbal.
The evening world., 1890-04-29

The Scottish American Athletic Club will
hold a vet of games Memorial Day at Gale
don an Park. Runs n obstacle races will
be the leading features,
The evening world., 1890-04-29

A EVERYBODY can Afford II: only 81 weekly,
IA gold watches. American Btemwinders, S25
M .Chsrig d Co.. 116 Nassau st. alter May l.
D3a broadway.
The evening world., 1890-04-29

A -A.-A.-A. A.-A.-We are the people
IA beautiful gold watch, American stemNindsJ
{!5 payable 81 weekly. ChGrig a Co., ll6
Nassau 81.
A -A.-A.-A. -A.-OuT customers are our best
xAs friends; gold. stem-Wind nE watch, non-mAg-
hstic movement, 42S. lady's watch. slS; others
low. Samples submitted. Mutual Watch
Co, .Ol Broadway.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-03-26
A Pompous Doctor.

Some years ago, in New York city,
there lived a divine named Osgood.
He is now dead, but many people will
not fail to remember him and his
amusing pomposity. For long time
he was pastor of the church Of the
Messiah, but after giving up that
charge he never got another. This
fact was a matter of some wonder to
many who knew him, and to many
who knew him it was not wonder in
the least, for the latter class felt con-
fident, from the doctors actions, that
it would have to be a pretty good
place to suit his vanity. He attend
ed all the swell meetings but none OF
the small ones. While at ore of the
former Dan Haskell, then on the Bos-
ton Transcript, and some others got
into conversation about the doctor.
Some one asked why DR.. Osgood did
not succeed in getting another church.
The reply was that he was not very
anxious to get one but Dan Haskell
Clipped in, saying: "Oh, yes he is,
but he is waiting for particular
place."
"What place is that. DAMP" some
one asked.
"a vacancy in the Trinity" replied
Haskell. -Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-03-26
Walked Up Efectually

A lethargic, dormant condition of the
liver Is hardly TO be overcome with dras-
tic cathartics and nauseous cholagogues.
A gentlier, pleasanter and far more effec
tive means exists of arousing the organs
when somnolent. This Is Hostetter's
Stomach Bitters, vouched for by the med
ical fraternity, tested by the public for
many years. A resumption by the hillary
organ of It's secretive function, with the
activity attendant upon health, q return
to regularity Of the bowels, and renew
al OF digestion, are the no less happy and
certain results of using the Bitters sys-
tematically. Its laxative effect Is never
painful and drenching, its tendency being
rather to pcrpetuatc regularity than to
produce copious action. Malaria, ner.
vousncss, debility, kidney troubles and
neuralgia 1t cures effectually.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-03-26
Away Up.

A dignifed looking stranger enter
ed the ticket Office of the st. Louis,
Iron Mountain Il Southern Railroad,
says the Memphis Avalanch, and stat
ed that he wished to purchase tickets
for himself and family to Texas, and
also wanted to secure rates for a car
load of household furniture. Colonel
Harry Wilson waited on the gentle
nan, and ascertained that his name
was Martin. He negotiated trade
with him for the tickets, and referred
him to the freight office on Monroe
street for information about freight
rates.
As the stranger displayed goodly
roll of Doodle, it was incumbent on
Col. Wilson to treat him with the con-
sideration due his Importance and so
he told Billy to take the colonel over
and introduce him to Mr.. BARLEY, and
he took care to lay the accent on the
colonel.
Billy got the stranger safely over
to the freight Office, and in his politest
manner presented him to Mr.. BARLEY
as follows:
"Mr. BARLEY, allow me to introduce
to you Col, Martin"
The stranger drew himself up
haughtily, and, striking an attitude,
with his right hand over his left breast
pocket, said IL am no colonel, young
man; am something higher than
that
Excuse me, | meant to say briga-
der apclogized Billy.
II have a higher title than that"
said the great man.
Billy was equal to the occasion, and
again came with, II really meant to
cay major-general, you know"
He was knocked out again, howev.
er, by the supposed officer remarking
with heightened dignity, which, how
ever, was softened by quiet. amused
smile: you have not got up high
enough yet"
you must be commander-in.chief
of the army" suggested Billy in a
doubtful sort of tone, but the strang-
err parslyzed him by the announce
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-03-26

ment that he had "a still higher title.
Bill was stumped. He thought the
distinguished visitor was no other than
the president travelling incog. but he
dismissed that idea, and then his curl
osity got the better of his reverence,
and he blurted OUT "Well, who are
you anyway 7"
"The stranger softly replied, II am
II minister Of the gospel, sir" and
Billy tainted dead away, while Will
BARLEY made "A half rate for the di-
vine on account Of his high title.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-03-26
Is Consumption IncurabIe.

Read the following: Mr. &. Ii. Morris
Newark, Ark, says: "Was down with
Absccss of Lungs, and friends and physi-
clans pronunced me an Incurable Con
sumptive. Began taking DIR. Kings New
Discovery for Consumption, am now on
my third bottle, and able to oversee the
work on my farm. 1t is the finest medi.
cine ever made"
Jesse Middlewart, Decatur, Ohio, says
"Had IL not been for DR.. Kings New Dis
covery for Consumption would have
died of Lung Troubles. Was given up
by the doctors. Am now In the best oil
health Try IL. Sample bottles 10c at
+. j. Monaghon's drug Store. o
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-03-26
ALPENA WEEKLY ARGUS.
MISCELLANEOUS.
THE MAN IN THE MOON.

A4Aa &&AaAf A&t 49, @@S1~
Oh, the Man In the Moon has crick in his back
whee
whimml
Amt you sorry for him
And mole on his nose that Is purple and black
Aud his eyes are so weak that they water and run
II he dares to dream even he looks at the sun,
So he Just dreams OF stars, the doctors advise
Myi
Eyes
But isn't he wise
To Just dream Of the stars 40 the doctors advised
And the Man in the Moon has boil on his ear.
Wheel
Wiling!
What a singular thing
know but these facts are authentic, my dear
There's boil on his ear and corn on his chin
He calls IL dimple. but dimpies stick in;
Yet IT might be dimple turned over, you know.
whangi
Hot
Why, certainly sol
1t might be dimple turned over, You know!
Gee
whizs
What pity that Isl
And his toes have worked round where his heel
ought TO be;
So whenever he wants TO go north he goes south.
And comes back with the porridge crumbs all
round his mouth.
And he brushes them Of with u japanese fan.
Wiling
whangl
What a marvellous mani
What very remarkable, marvellous man
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-03-26
Electric Btttcrs.

This remedy Is becoming so well known
and so popular as to need no special men,
tion. All who have used Electric Bitters
sing the same song OF praise. A purer
medicine does not exist and it Is guaran-
teed to do all that Is claimed. Electric
Btters will cure all diseases of the Liver
and Kidneys, will remove Pimples, Boils,
Salt Rheum and other affections caused
by impure blood. VIII drive Malaria
from the system aud prevent as well as
cure all Malarial levers. For the cure
OF headache, constipation and indiges-
ton try Electric Bitters. Entire sat
isfaction guaranteed, or money refund
ed. Price 30 cts. and 81 per bottle at
T. j. Monaghan's drug store. B
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-03-26
Bucklen,s ArnIca Salye.

The best salve In the world for cuts
bruises, sores, ulcers, salt rheum, fever
sores, letter, chapped hands, chilblains
corns, and all skin eruptions, and posi-
lively cures piles, or no pay required. II
Is guaranteed TO give perfect satisfaction
or money refunded. Price rs cents pei
box. For sale by p. J. Monaghan, drug
gists. 944y1.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-03-26
Club List.

Parties desiring to save money can
take advantage Of the following club
list at this Office, for journals for
Qnn.
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1890-06-28
Tho Democratic Nominations.

Ohio county Republicans should not
make the mistake OF bclittlipg the
strength OF tho legislative ticket placed
In the field yesterday by the Democrats,
and should look about for material that
can beat It. There Ia plenty OF 1t, and
the exercise Of good judgment Is all that
is needed 10 bring It into the field. The
character Of the Democratic nominations
and the caution pursued in selecting
them demonstrates two things-tlras,
that tho party realizes the serious con-
dition that eonironts 1t, and the fact
thu. the Democracy is in the throes Of
death, as illustrated by the last election !;
second, that they have carried out the
policy outlined by tho State Conference
at Parkersburg last week, which is to
select the best men available. 1t Is un.
doubleday true that the ticket nomi.
mated yesterday could have been i'm.
proved upon, but 1t does not follow that
1t Is not formidable one.
Tho ISTELLidEScgn trusts that the
Ohio county Republicans will come to-
gether ut their primaries in spirit born
Of determination to send solid dele.
CATION to the Legislature this year as a
rcbuke to the desperate gang Of poll
ticians who composed the last Assem-.
bly, and succcededin cheating the people
Of West Virginia OF their rightfully
elected Governor. To this end the aim
should be TO prevail upon the best and
strongest men available to make the
race-men who arc willing to sacrifice
any private considerations for the good
Of the party and for the State Of Wes
Virginia.
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1890-06-28
NZPH LOCAL CASES.
The Series is Continued Great
Work q DIS. Copeland 4 Bell
sill Goes on..-Ths Chain
LsnSlhhsls.
Fashioned Link by Link-Each
Week Marking Its Extcnsion..Evi.
dcnCc or Nfr. John Marshall .


In continuing the series OF chapters
relating personal experiences, place Is
given 10 the following, furnished by n
gentleman well known III Wheeling us a
contractor and builder.
Mr.. John Marshall has lived for some
time at q Twcnty.second street, Wheel
ing.
"Just put Il down and describe It as J give II
10 yoN," said Mr.. Mar.hall. Though II Is PAST
now. there Is not anything that have forgot
ten nbout It. Men don't forget s,ich things. II
WIS my head that frat began to tronO!e me
about eight years ago." hs continued. MY
nostrils would clog up, tltst one side aud then
tho other. sometimes they would be sore aud
sentative on the inside. For Il timc 1t was 10
bad that could not bica,he through my nose nj
all-would have to sleep With my mouth open.
There was n continuous discharge, with such n
constant dropping Of mucous from my Head
back Into my throat Ms TO H!mtst stranglc me III
times. wbs nlways hawking and raising 10
clear II. l was never FREE from sore throat. II
WAS usually SO raw and intiamt1 that ! could
hardly swallow NJ all, or with great difficulty.
would catch cold without any apparent caase.
A continual hacking cough set In, which, try ~
] HoHl4, could ao{ ret I'D III.
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1890-06-28
Crossing tho Atlantic In rlvo Days.

Neu York Tribune. As
An expert opinion Of higher value on
the question OF still further reducing the
time required to cross the Atlantic could
scarcely be obtained than that Of tho
builders OF such swift and magnificent
steamships as the City of Paris and the
City OF New York. Mr.. James II.
Thomson, CT the firm Of James & George
Thomson, who built those twin ocean
beauties, has written briefly but point
eddy on tho question. He has mo hest.
tation in saying that in very short
time the record will probably be re-.
duced to close on to five days. As
the principal agent in reducing tho
time Of the voyage, he rates the twin
screw, declaring that its superiority
to the single screw is beyond dispute.
While reduction Of the passage to less
than five days is impossible from an en-.
gineering point OF view. Mr.. Thomson
believes that it would be imprudent for
any company to build ship to go faster,
as the expenditure would make 1t ex-
tremely doubtful whether such ship
would pay. OF course it is obvious that
there must bea limit to the possible speed
OF an ocean steamship; but the marked
reductions that have taken place in the
transatlantic voyage in recent years
make it pretty certain that this has not
yet been reached. Five days does not
seem an unreasonable time from Sandy
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1890-06-28

After n lime, sharp palms. sticking Ike N
khlse. would take Inc In the region OF the heart,
sometimes 40 severe rs to almost take my breath
away. had constant pains through the head,
over the eyes. on top and IN the tack Of the
head that at times almost drove mo iiantlc.
"1loSt steadily In flesh. Ny sleep dian seem
to do me any good. | would get up IN tho morn.
Ing. feeling Ms tired Ms when went to bed. My
appetite failed. Might swcats came on and
weakened me terribly. had feverish spells.
followed by cold, chilly feeling, which made
me unfit for business. Whatever would take
on my stomach seemed TO rest life heavy load
there. would have a feeling Of discomfort and
nausea after eating. l would sit down TO tAe
table with hearty appetite and would only
eat a few mouthtulls,
81 tried everything and everybody. but grew
steadily worse. My head aud throat became III.
most unbesrhb!c. The pains In my chest and
night sweAts increased, Al last read In the
daily papers OF a case similar TO my own which
had been trthted aud cured by Frs. Copeland &
Bell. went to see them myself. md found their
cha'ges very reasonable and within my means,
though am not r rich mni. Although they
did not promise much, felt that they could
help me.
"They did indeed. improved steadily from
the start under their Treatment. Ny head and
throat became clear. The night sweats disap
peared. gained In weight. can cat n good
meal now and feel well afterwards. feel well
and strong uow-qulte like another man.
1T was not BY any ulCnns temporary In
provcment. I continued to gct stronger aud
better until the last trace OF my trouble pissed
away. | am we'll and hearty man, and feel
grateful to Drs. Copeland & Bell for my com.
plete and entire recovery"
Mr.. John marshall, who makes this statement
Wheeling, and his statement can be easily veIi.
fed, ...s ~.
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1890-06-28
lilaino to tho Farmers.

Secretary Blaine last week gave n
quiet tip to the Western farmers, in a
letter addressed TO citizens OF Minneap.
oils, which, ii they accept it, might
prove Of value to them. ut has been
constantly said" writes Mr.. Blaine,
"that the Western farmers demand the
unconditional repeal OF the sugar duty.
1t is within the power Of Western farm
ers, by encouraging q system OF recin-
rocity, to secure, in exchange for the re-
peal Of this duty, tho free admission OF
their breadstuils and provisions into the
markets OF forty millions Of people, in
Guiding Cuba. In my opinion this is
the most profitable policy for tho West.
ern farmer. Free sugar in the United
States should be accompanied by free
breadstufls and provisions in Spanish
America"
These ideas DO not involve a yielding
OF one inch OF Mr.. Blaine's protection
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1890-06-28


We offer One Hundred Dollars reward
for any case Of catarrh that cannot be
cured by Halls Catarrh Cure.
FL. cheney 4 Co., Props, Toledo, 0.
We, the undersigned, have known T.
J. Cheney for the last Is years, and be-
lieve him perfectly honorable in all bus.
mess transactions, and financially able
to carry out any obligations made by
their firm.
WEST 4 TRuAx Wholesale Druggist,
Toledo, 0.
WALpING, KISSAN 4 MARVIN, Whole:
sale Druggists, Toledo, Q.
Halls Caturrh Cure is taken inter.
nally, acting directly upon the blood
and mucus surfaces Of the system. Tes-
timonials aent Tree. Price 75c. per bot
tie. Sold by all Druggists. DIV
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1890-06-28

-, FoR a Disordered Liver try Beecham's