Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1890-02-27
GranIfeNiiIe Items.

ECs. R"gtSteT-COnsiderabl more than one
hundred years ago DR. Johnson, the cele
b-ated English writer, gave it as his solemn
belief that a difficult surgical operation had
to be performed ere joke of any kind could
be inserted into the brain of a Scotsman.
At different periods ] iifsfe been in Iined to
to doubt the truth of this assertion of his,
but, alas! the events of the last two weeks
have caused me to place the most implicit
faith in its truth, and credit the author with
being able to distinguish much more readily
than |, the fact thatsin the average Scottish
nature the grave predominates over the gay,
that the merriest moments of their lives
must, if taken any notice of at all, be cele-
brated with 4 certain soemnity of manner
and dignity of behavior suitable to the oc-
casion, and if some rash writer should see
fit to make mention of any of these solemn
gatherings of theirs, it is at his peril if he
speaks of them in other than a serious man
ner. Mr.. Editor, | have been led to this
strain of thought by the perusal of the letter
from Graniteville signed zone oftne Gang"
Though, quietly, l may as well confess my
first feelings were not at all serious. / had
of the thing. Is ii possible TO-. some people
to see the point of joke, or to laugh at one
even If the laugh be partly on themselves:
1t seems not, more's the pity. And now, my
Young friend, just q few words with you.
To begin with, get some good dictionary
Webster's, for instance-and see what his
definition of the word gang really is; when
you find out | trust you will have the good
sense to excuse yourself. Yes, my friend, it
is true tlat the most of the young IN question
are unmarried, but l doubt very much if
that is any fault of theirs. Appearances
wOu.d rather lead me to think that in the
good Judgment and sound common sense of
ne young ladies of Graniteville is where the
fault lies. Be not angry, young men, be-
cause | said you were unmarried; no one
blames you for your state of single unbess-
edness, knowing well you cannot help it and
also, that you would quickly alter it if you
could. As for that scriptural quotation
with which YOU seek to fortify your argu-
meut, the less said the better. Were some
young lady but to whisper yes to the ques-
ton you would like SO much to ask, st. Paul'S
admonition would get scant consideration at
your hands. Again, lay the fact of those
people whom you disturbed, looking and
acting so pleasant and happy, to their court
esy and good breeding rather than to pleas
ure at being disturbed by you. The last
section of his ette- mav be. taken notice of
very briefly. He speaks of facts, and by in
ference would have understood that do not
adhere to them as closely is consistent
with truth, yet in no material point does he
dispute anything L have said. As for the
story Of the fox and the grapes l would say
it does not apply to me in any way. No one,
unless lamentably obtuse, can find a vestige
of spite in the letter to which he takes so
many exceptions. 1t was penned in a spirit
of friendly criticism and as such 1 fully eX-
pected i to be received, but have been ais
appointed.
The entertainment which the choir of the
VI. E. Church gave on the evening of the IS h
inst. did not prove to be such a success as
had confidently expected it would. The at
tendance while fair, was by no means large.
and as a Consequence the receipts were
smaller than any one thought they were
likely to be. Most of the singing was of
high standard of excellence so far as the
singers and music were concerned, though
the propriety may well be questioned of hav-
ing, at an entertainment, the music all of
sacred nature. l yield to none in my respect
for the church, yet / must say that /, il COM
mon with many others, was much disap
pointed-not with the manner IN which the
singers performed their parts, for, as said