Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1890-09-05
Mr.. AND MRS. BOWSER.
THE HEAD OF THE FAMILY TRIES
SLEEPING IN A HAMMOCK.

| his OOnoCi thO oNhCA OfOhthS 40
he sat reading his paper.
"What is it 2"
"Nothing, except that Pve been
a fool !"
The next evening be came home
an hour earlier than usual, and he
had a large bundle under his arm.
He didn't wait for me to ask what
1t contained, but unrolled 1t and
said:
81 propose to sleep in this ham.
mock after this"
"But where will You hang it ?"
"Oh, I'll find a place. How
stupid of me not to have thought
of it before y
After prospecting for while he
decided on the fiat, grayeIed root
of the kitchen, which was easily
reached from an upstairs window
He found a place for the hooks
and stretched the hammock, and
an hour before our usual bed time
he was prepared to occupy it. he
removed his coat, vest, collar and
shoes, kissed baby good night and
went out Of the window, while I
sat down beside 1t to watch the
course OF events. Mr.. BOwser had
sluDg the hammock about three
feet above the roof. He walked
over to 1t, gave it shake and fell
into it. No, he didn't. It dOdGed
him and he went down on his
hands and knees and got up NUT.
teriDg:
ooh, that's your game, is it ?
Well, you don't beat me again" "
1t took him ten minutes to get
stretched on his back in the folds
of the hammock, and he had
scarcely heayed the first sigh of
satisfaction when he gave kick
and growled:
"Consarn it, but the mosquitoes
have found me out already. Take
that"
For the next ten minutes he was
busy with the pests, and it was
while be was thrashing his arms
about and kicking his feet that the
hook at the foot of the hammock
pulled out, and Mr.. Bovser came
down with a crash on the roof.
The gravel flew and he uttered a
yell, and l appeared at the window
to ask:
"Mr. Bowser, what has happen
ed ? Has the roof collapsed Z"
COLLAPSED nothing" he growled'
as he hunted for the hook.
"But what was that awful
noisei"
81 didn't hear a sound. got
out of the hammock to lower 1t a
bit. Go back to bed and stay
there ,
When he thought l had gone he
fixed the hook and got back into
the hammock, but could hear
him growing under his breath
about pitch, gravel, mosquitoes
and idiots, and | knew he WASN'T
at peace with all mankind, for the
next half hour | could hear him
slapplng at the insects and twist
ing abolt. Then | suddenly caught
sight of three or four boys skulk'
lng up the alley. 1t was bright
moonlight, and from the way they
acted / knew they were son" to
Mr.. Bowser. Some of them had
, probably seen him Singing the
hammock before dark and sns
3 pected his design. They came op
? posite. stood in line and at a sig
nal all let fly, and jumped behind
the barn. Each one threw a po.
+ tato, and while only one hit the
hammock the others cras h
against the house with a lou'
noise.
sJewhittaker but what on eartt
: is that 7" gasped Mr.. Bowscr as h'
sat mp.
u "Mr. Bowser, is everything al
right Z" Iasked from the window.
"Everything all right WHAT
y y the matter with youi Why don
% you go to bed !"
- "I-I thought l heard anothe
q noise"
- "Oh, you did 4! Well, l didn'
I was almost asleep when You gel
!, ed out"
| pretended to 20 away, an
after bit Mr.. Bowser settled dow
on bis back and everything wa
- quiet. Then the boys came OF
again. There were four Of then
y. They had a hat full of missiles, an
:. each threw three or four belol
making a retreat. MIR. Bcws'
was hit in The head with a pOtat
= and in the side with tomato, an
on the leg With a cucumber, al
>; the noise of the other missl'
.xn, liLa