The Helena independent. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1875-1943, 1890-10-02
Three Hours of High-Class Comedy
by a Company of Compe-
tent Performers.
The First Ward Neighborhood
Brawls Again Re-
hearsed.
Entertainment That Proves Very Expen
sive to the Taxpayers-How
1t Ended.

The most successful original light farce
comedy of the season was presented at
Judge Sanders police court last evening.
The audience was very small, but this can be
readily accounted for when it is announced
that the renowned Clara Morris was in the
city and of course drew a large audience
The scene of the comedy was laid in the
First ward and the farce was entitled Spell.
man vs. Moran, or tale of assault and
battery.
The star-well, every actor in the farce
was star; it was All all star company OF
comedians, late of DonnyDrook or some
other place on the "auld sod.'' 1t was a
comedy in three acts. Judge Sanders oc-
cppied a seat on the stage and six men who
found it difficult to look serious were the
critics of the evening. County Attorney
Nolan filled the "prompters" box and Ser
geant Quirk gave the "cue'' to the several
comedians as they were required to recitc
their lines.
Martin Moran occupied front seat during
most of the performance and on the whole
the small audience witnessed one of the
most ludicrous and laughable farces of the
season and by the time the curtain dropped
on the last scene there was not a person in
the room whose sides did not ache
with laughter. The most amusing part of
the performance was that the players we're
totally unconscious of the fun they created.
Mrs. Patrick Spellman opened the pro-
logue by reciting her version of the story of
q fight which took place at her house Tues
day. This star is familiar figure in
the witness box Of the police court. She is
Ito hear her tell 1t) the very acme of limo
cence and peace and would never
Co. Mnrt MI
who pleaded his own case, permitted the
witness to relate her tale of woe and then
began to cross examine her, but her ideas
were directly opposite to his. Frequently
Attorney Moran forgot himself, and in
stead OF waiting his turn went on to relate
his version. and II kept the judge busy rap
ping him to order.
''Shure, tits no USE judge, | can't get the
likes o. that woman to tell the truth" and
wringing his hands, he allowed the woman
to go.
Then Maggie Spellman. eight years old,
took the stand. With angelic innocence
the little one replied to the court when it
asked her if she knew what an oath was,
that she knew her sister told her if she told
lie she would not go to heaven.
This little girl was the cause of the entire
row. While passing Mr.. Moran's house she
threw stones at his wife. Her husband saw
her doing this, and made the mistake of
going to the girls home to report her con-
duct to her mother.
Again did Attorney" Moran find it i'm
possible. he said, to get the truth out of the
girl. Its no use, judge, l tell you they
will lle."
Next Miss Mary Spellman was on the
stand, and she only reiterated, but in
more entertaining way, her mothers YER
sion of the farce. and Morans cross -Ques-
tlonlng was very amusing. After the wit
ness would make statement, Moran would
proceed at length to contradict, but by a
persistent use OF his gavel and commanding
tones the judge managed to hold them at
bay. though he occasionally gave up in de-
spair
When Patrick Spellman mounted the
stand there was craning of necks and
expectant feeling among the audience for
some fun. Asked to proceed, the little
Irishman in most inaudible but emphatic
and broguish tones began: "Well yer
honor, yesterday afternoon / wus exca-
vayting on my lot, which somebody says is
on some other mans lot, and" Here the
court interfered and told the witness to
contine himself to his knowledge of the
case at bar. well. as l said before, was
excavayting and heard screams of murder,
and l rushed to the house and saw Moran
having, hold of my wife. He threw several
kicks in me belly, SO he did, After the
laughter had subsidized Patrick pro-
ceeoed to amuse the audience in his
most original way, and when he got through
the dialogue between him and Moran was
side splitting.
The second act began with Moran's side
of the story, and his wife appeared first.
Among other things. she said Mrs. Spell
man had frequently thrown stones at her,
called her unmentionable names, and
threatened to burn her house. Mrs. Spell
man then spoke out IN court, and. notWith-
standing the judges threats to fine her for
contempt. she continued to jabber Mt a
rapid rate. until she had her say complete.
Mrs. Sullivan, an old woman of about
seventy on more years, on whom the
wrinkles of time have set deeply, next tot
tered to the platform. She began by in
forming everybody that if she ever told
truth she would do it now; and, striking a
position IN her chair that suited her, she
started in. Very few words she said could
be understood; but now she was on her
feet. then STOPPING over next doubled up and
going through all kinds of motions. irving
to picture IN most graphic maner just
what took place at the casa de Spellman.
Mr.. Moran called at her house to borrow
smoke. The old lady got a pipe for him
and about this time the little spellman girl
was seen throwing stones. Mrs Sullivan
and Mrs. Moran We're both ut Speliman' 8
room trying to save Moran's life. The old
woman said she shouted 20, Meelo muir
der!' when she saw the scene. She grew
very excited while relating the story and
while i'll this condition she noticed Mrs.
Spellman laughing at her and making
faces. The old woman immediately dropped
her story and turned loose en- Mrs. Spell
man to the great amusement of everybody
present, and it took the combined efforts of
Judge and sergeant and Officer FRYE to re-
store order. There was no use irving to
stop the old lady; she was wound up for
some time and said all she had to say.
AS she got down from the stand another
conflict between her and Mrs. Spe,lman
hrnER
hight IN the court room would result,
Bllly' Mellen, who was on the Jury. fell
over his chair and rolled on the floor with
laughter and the other iUrymen enjoyed il
nearly as much andthe court itself forgot
its usual dignlfed countenance and Joined
in the revelry.
Quiet was finally restored and Mr. Moran
related his story. 1t appears that when hs
got to Mrs. Spellman's door she and hel
daughter dragged Moran inside and began
to annihilate him without giving him ,
chance to talk. Pans and shovels and pok.
ers and everything available was used as ;
weapon and Moran found it difficult to es.
cape. Patrick Spellman soon appeared OF
the scene with a shovel in one hand and ,
hatchet in the other and assisted in the as
sault on Moran, Mrs. Spellman urging Pat
rick to kill him. Not until a policeman
appeared did Moran get away and he car
ries scars that tell the story Of a hot struc
gle. None of the Spellmans were injured
In his brief address to the jury Col. Nolal
said he thought that hostillties among thes,
factions had ended; but now a declaration
of renewed and vigorous warfare hetuaa,