Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-07-30
NAUTICAL yhUMOR.
Some Bon Mots Which Are Told of thu
Crack Oarsmen.

tnC
Crack Oarsmen.
AS a class, professional oarsmen are
the most ''amoosing critters" in the
sporting line. OF list'of some twenty
five professional ''seat sliders' at least
twenty are characters" Of the latter
number majority are looked upon as
born wits. Jack Largan, the English
sculler, who beat Pearce and half a
dozen other cracks of the British Isles
and who is now living in Harlem, is con-
sidered one of the funniest men in the
business. His jokes are known to every
amateur on the Harlem, and the dry
serious question has repeatedly placed
him in hot water.
One of the best stories about Largan
not generally known was told to a re-
porter the other day. 1t seems that
Largan saved a mum Der of persons from
drowning in the Thames at various
times before he won championship at
the SOULS. Some of his friends en-
couraged him in seek ng a medal from
the Humane Society. Hemade applica-
ton, but because he lacked the neces-
ognized. After that he turned very
sour on the Humane crowd, as he put
it. One Saturday afternoon Largan was
out on the Thames in boat much like
our American or Whitehall boat. A row
boat ontaining three men which was
near him capsized and before Largan
reached the scene one of the men was
drowned. Largan saved the other two
and hauled them into his boat. When
the rescued found courage to talk one
of them said to Largan that he was a
brave Briton and ought to be given a
medal by the Humane Society.
''It's no 60" said Largan. "They
can't try any of their flabbergast on me-.
I've been and tried 'em.'
Nonsense, man." replied one of the
survivors, you'll get reward sure.
! Why, just see what you have done!" and
the speaker went into glowing account
of the brave rescue Largan sat silently
throughout, his bubble of Importance
getting larger each second as the speaker
progressed, until finally he began to
think that perhaps he had won clear
right to the medal. The speaker con-
Guided: Eyes, you are bound to get that
medal. The man who was lost was our
boatman, this gentleman here is a
bobby and I'm the secretary Of the
Humane Society"
The speaker had hardly finished than
Largan dropped the oars with which he
was rowing, jumped to his feet, swore
two or three times, and finally said:
$50 I've saved bobby and one of
these Humane people, eh? The Lord
forgive me; what have / done-what
have / done?"
Another yarn about Largan tells how
he once attended ''spread" at one of
| the London club houses. There was a
little old Scotch woman In charge of the
viands. She was as selfish as six
months-old infant. There was a fine
piece of roast beef on the table, and she
started in to carve it for Largan and
few others. She cut it in It's
sue paper fashion, SO thin that
one could almost read a newspa-
per through each slice. Largan kept
his eye on her for time, and after she
had cut three or four tissue pieces he
| said: "Look out, ma am, look out, the
WIHuOW UcuAuu you Is open anu SOulo VI
that beef may blow into my plate"
The honest Scotch woman failed to
understand why every body within ear
shot of Largau's remark laughed When
he saw that his ration was not to be in
creased Largan shouted again at the lit
tie woman: May something divine
give your arm strength, missus, to cut a
decent piece of beef for workingnan. :"
Ned Hanlan, too, is a funny man. The
| night of the day that he first defeated
Trickett in England he was invited to q
| club dinner. Champagne flowed like
| water, and as the Canadian had pulled
off the good thing he felt justified in GO
| ing in for little pleasure. He became
muddled in due time, and while in that
state was called on by the four hundred
| or five hundred club men present for u
speech. Now, Hanlan had never adj
dressed an audience before in his life,
| and he objected, but it was no use there,
and half dozen of his admirers hauled
| him to his feet. He stood up. dazed and
confused with the champagne rushing
to his very brain, glanced at the small
army of faces that met his eyes, tried to
stand erect and finally blurted out as
/ his maiden speech: you gentleman
know your business l also know m ne.
Good night."-N. Y. Mail and Express.
Tho poiutar fha R~t