Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1890-01-17

wearing seven suits of clothes ard a
crocheted lap robe around his neck,
walked up TO the iron fence and be-
gan eating his lunch, the polar bear
tainted.
The polar bear inhabits the frigid
zone north and south of a given
point, where he subsists on trapped
relief expeditions. Once he was pure
as the beautiful snow, but now, by a
careful scrutiny Of his pluinage, he
finds that he is not SO. He looks like
detected door mat, and, on a hot
day, his pants are checked somewhat
by the heat.
We now pass on TO the kangaroo
| annex, where We find also the coon,
both American and African. The
kangaroo is ruminating marsupial.
But it is hereditary and therefore not
SO reprehensible as it might be other
wise. There are two or three varie-
ties of this pleasing beast, and all OF
the genus Micropus, think, though
| would not have any one TO take my
word for it on such matter as that,
! involving as it does the peace of so
many people. There are the micrQpus
giganteuS, the yellowfooted kangaroo,
also the rat kangaroo and the kan
garoo itself The kangaroo has been
so sedentary all his life that his lead
ing vitals seem to have settled into
the base of his system. He is of
long wasted turn of mind and springs
with great agility from place 10 place
like bogus nobleman seeking for a
bride. Some kangaroos are gregarl-
Gus in their habits, while others are
not. Whether anything can be done
for it or not | do not pretend TO say.
am not here to moraliZe. Ny duties
simply embrace terse description Of
the animal itself. The only cases,
however, where the kangaroo has
not been gregarious are isolated.
We here see the American opossum,
or didelphiS VUginiana. He ought to
be the crest Of the civil service reform
party, for to the casual observer he
is extremely dead.
We next pass to the fiat occupied
by the hippopotami or the genus
pachyderm. The two hippopota-
muses., as our best English writer's
give the plural, the other style given
above being the Latin plural, are eX-
tremely amphibiOus, and pachyder-
matous is no name for it. You can
make almost any kind of damaging
statement about hippopotamus and
prove it. The hippopotamus at Cen
trail Park always has large and en-
thusiastic audience. He has all the
various and versatile beauties OF the
morgue, with none of its drawbacks.
The hippopotamus has massive
brain, which he uses more for the
purpose of digestion than meditation.
He has broad muzzle, and when he
opens his mouth visitors get but an
imperfect view of the park. He loves
to insert himself in his neat little tank
just so that his brows and organ OF
self-esteem will appear above the sur
face and suffer himself to be ad-
mired.'
The puma is in the house with the
two-horned rhinoceros. He is called
field concolor by the biologists, who
have studied him at distance OF
several miles. The puma is also called
the mountain lion by those who have
associated with him. | saw one OF
these animals side-track himself in
order to let our train go past in Utah
once. He went up telegraph pole
and peered in the window as | went
by. The puma does not care for as
paragus. Spring lambs and little
children make a good style Of removes
for him. He rarely eats a person
who smokes cigarettes or eats raw
onions.
Near the puma we find some de-
lightful snakes. They are on an ele-
waited floor of a plain, unfurnished
cage. The moccasin snake is there
the beautiful, but disagreeable, Tori
copbls pisciUoriS Of the Southern States.
The boa constructor is also resting III
a corner, looking longingly and hun
prilv at the two-horned rhinOceros
on the other side of the aisle.
So much has been said of the late
Mr.. Crowley and his sorrowing widow
that | would not refer to them here
at length, for other and abler pens
than mine have covered the ground.
Suffice it to say that though essen
TALLY humorist, Mr.. Crowley had
his own sorrows TO contend with, ana
though lie brought many smiles TO
the faces of those who were sad, he
suffered mentally and physically all
his life. Matrimonially he was not
happy, having been forced mo an
alliance which was distasteful TO him,
yet Mr.. Crowley respected his mar
riage vows, even while hating the
bondage to which he was subjected.
No one will ever know how his heart
ached when he thought OF the petite
7 chimpanzee he had left in his far
away home. or how her image was in
his heart when he died and left his life
insurance TO the one who now bears
his name. Though his humor was
rather broad, and, therefore, objec-
tionable TO the more refined, he got
great many good press notices, and
with a little better voice would have
succeeded as lecturer. Dying in
/ Now York as he did. he will not get a