The prison mirror. [volume] (Stillwater, Minn.) 1887-1894, 1890-12-25
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AT CHRISTMAS PLAY, AND MAKE GOOD CHEER,
FoR CHRISTMAS COMES BUT ONCE YEAR."

black bottle had erlong for company. Wall,
l reckon l were about five miles from home
when ole Nance give snort an stopped
stark still; an Pm burned if could see
what allied her. l IwhOOped an hOllered.
an she would MT 60. Wall. jes as l was
gOin' to git down she give jump. an l got
a whack erlOng side my he'd that keeled me
over in the wagon.
An, boys. when kim back from angel
land, what do yer think l saw? l could MT
believe it myself at first, an l took out my
bowie an jes tickled my rib with it to see if
[ was dreamin'. But no. sir, was broad
awake. and seen eleven bars sittin' errOuud
me in regular ole Arkansaw style. An
thar were every durn thing 1 had in my
wagon piled out in front of me. Wall. sir.
my ha'r ris yer can bet. an when one of
them big ole brutes hit one of the kegs of
ole SO rye and busted it, it made me cuss.
Wall, sir. reckon that bust saved my life.
for them bars crowded errOund that Ticker.
an talk about Salley eatin' ice cream, it
was whisperin' to the way them bars licked
up that ole $50 rye. Wall. in e1bout fifteen
minutes yer ought to have seem them-but
when one ole chap got erhOlt on that pianer
box and begin to turn the handle, then thar
was fun. 1t kind O. s'prised him at first,
but he tuck to it like an lrishman to
whisky, an them other bars jes doubled up,
an I'll be dad gasted if did MT see some
as purity Virginia reels as l ever seen in our
old barn by the best O. the boys an gals.
- Wall, sir, tried to leave that crowd seV-
eral times. but could MT cut 'em, for they
left off their fun whenever made move;
an the ole fellow who had the pianer box
dropped it on me an picked it up. to kind
O. save it from gettin' broke. They busted
another keg, an, when seen 'em lickin it
up [ concluded to take sup too. an l out
with my bottle an took good one. Il
needed it boys fer what followed.) Them
bars got up close errOund me an it seemed
to me was 'sputn' as who was goin' to have
me for supper. When thought struck me-
l jes got that ole organ, or pianer, on my
knee, an started that handle ergoin'. Them
thar bars jes looked an then-bOys. did
you ever see one of them ole darkes rock
an twist hiself a'fore he struck the right
swing fer the ole hoe down? Wall, them
bars begin rOckin' an a shakin' their
he'ds. an then. with kind of whOop an
grunt, they started to scratch the rocks to
the tune of THE Irish Washerwoman."
tell yer. l could hardly keep still myself,
boys. Wall, l kept her windin', till l was
plum tagged out, an them bars was a
sweatin'.
Wall, they lckered up again an so did 1,
an give 'em the ''Suwanee River fer a
change. burned if them bars wasn't like
humans. Wall. once more l had to stop
an rest. an take sup of old rye. an l
did MT start again till seen them bars get
tim kind o. Uneasy. an then l started er
new tune-One as the man who sold me the
pianer box said was new anyhow. Wall.
boys. l had no more than got the handle
twice erround on the new tune. when them
bars stopped short an took to the woods;
but one as was near me hit me a whack
with his paw that put me to sleep.
When kim to again, ole Jim Mcclure
an Miranda was bendin' over me, an
callin' my name. Wall. to make an endin,
tOle 'em of my adventure. but they said l
was dead drunk. But 1 showed em the
busted kegs an everything had bought in
town, or what was left of it, but they
would MT believe me. l even showed 'em
the pianer box that l had been workin' fer
them durn bars. l showed 'em the tunes l
played. an the last one of 'em was called
''Down With McGinty." or somethin' like
that.
Wall, got rakin' from the ole 'oman,
you bet, but Jim Mcclure an Scaggs went
back and got some more Ticker an we had a
gay old Krismas, an got more drinks fer
tellin' 'em how them thar bars stepped.
than l ever will get again. Wall, it's all
past an gone now an here am in burned
worse fix than when l was playn' dancin'
master to eleven bars in ole Arkansaw.
PEToRA.
Labor brings pleasure: idleness. pain. !"