Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-05-09

" ia just give you uts TO F0A hearts great ueLlL
DRUGIsTs.
s'Oh I'm sick:' says the Dude Wen just 90 right
To Fishers the druggist where every things
Just everything nice from Eaude cologne
To Hostetters bitteFs your stOmuche 70 tone
Del harmon will cure you II Fisher should spile
With though on rats Cubebs or pure qua vitae
Which Nettie, the angel of mercy brings down
70 the suffering and sOrFOwing in Phllilps5urg
NEWSPAPERS
The papers come uext-The Herald, Dispatch.
The Democrat sturdy that ne er found his match
Except when he tries q conclusion with his wife
For she's a match for him, you may wager Your
But McNay, the sly rascal out quietly clips,
And though ne don't drink gets al the Elpps,
But in talking OF him we d better be civil
For here comes young Arthur the cute little devil.
BAND.
Stand aside for the band boys, my friends let
them pass,
They've plenty Of music. and plenty of brass;
With the blare Of the horn and the beat of the
They blow you right into the kingdom to come.
JEwELER.
The jeweler Hoffman, has set out his store,
And covered our Hettie, with jewels galore,
With watches and bracelets and gems OF first
If you don t buy OF him you certainly oughter.
CABPENTERs
There's E. and there's NJ. and there's o. and
think they need houses, ere long by the way
TIE lamps in the parlOrs, burn family at night,
And the iOag walks they take ia the EllveFy moon
If they do, Mr. Crookham viii build them house
A real bridal cottage, as snug as mouse,
when they II begin life as the poet has sungi
If you don't believe this, just ask LOtue Young.
BARRIERS.
YoH smooth, faced young dude who's somewhat
II you've stamina enough young whiszer to
And ye piOuss ones all, who believe It's sin
! To 90 day by day without clean skin,
Come over to Reams, who Il give you 8 shave
/ and bath. hot or cold, your bodies to lave,
/ So, to have new lease of your life, you viii
AS per banner bourne here by the best haif Of
Ream.
/ FLOUR AND FEED.
And here is couple who have ice, grain and feed,
| One shows the abundance, the other, the need
! They're just like the pictures the dOctOrs are
One, tabled Sbefore, the other, since taking
/ One look at plump Elba, and away you'll 90 flying
/ To McKee's for some flour to keep You from
And if you're too warm just take my advice
And ask jolly Elbie for big chunk of ice.
BANKS.
/ Solid and sober, and dignifed, now,
| Enter the banks Of our WOrshipful town,
With bank notes and silver, and gold all aglOW,
/ VIII loan You million, and plank it right down.
/ Young Rogers, treasury note good as the g0Id'
Though he thinks that Miss Ivy Is better L III
Miss Gussie is silver, vthe dollar of our dads,
Though she'll pass with the sens too, they'll take
/ her in scads;
Pass on Mr.. Banker, don't turn on the screw,
Be easy on Us and Wen be easy on you.
GENERAL MERCHANDISE
Hardware and dry goods, groceries and grain,
The wealth Of all lands, land the spOIls OF th'
The spices Of the islands, the silks of Cathay,
The wheat OF eur own lands, the teas far away,
The furs of Alaska, the fruits Of the isles,
And hardware and tinware, in carloads and piles
Theirs nothing too costly Tiers nothing too new
For our merchants to show you, If You just wan
And nobody viii sell you as cheap as they will,
For they love the bright silver that chinks IN tn
There's Spaulding and LefingweT and Gebhar
Who've every thing nice, in the way of dry goods
SeWeii and Polling, French Johnston and Young
No preacher ere told, and no poet ever sung,
The wonders they have, in the way Of hardware,
| Stoves, kettles and pans, it would make your eye
To see, the low prices, they've marked them a
, Way down below zero, in city and towns
Smith Center and Stockton, Almenn and Norton
We've got all the goods that their merchants ar
Seven beautiful girls, as good as they're pretty,
! Represent all these firms in wonderful city
/ There's Clara and Leila, Della and Rose,
5 And Katie and Emma and Winnie, who knows
= ! How to be gentle and how to be cruel,
3 I suppose she has learned il by CleFking fC
And last of them all Mrs. French, but not least,
For the sight OF her face is as good as feast.
9 ROCK ISLAND r r.
q / All! here comes the iron horse over the plains
a The Rock Island road with its vestibule trains,
= Its slespeTs and dining cars, servants and wine,
t Where we sleep half the day and the rest Of
q dine;
: I think if could I'd bring baby and wife,
I Preempt a whole car and just settle for life.
|, BLACRs1ITHs.
9 Under the spreading chestnut tree, the viuag
a smithy stands,
. Not much in the town of PhiIIipsburg, though
g may be in other lands,
Y But hear it stands just west of the bank,
y And all day long the anVils Clank,
u You may here every day both early and late
+ Al the lion is forged by good blacksmith Haigh
, And Ross MCCO mick will tell you his charge
Is neither too small, for mis- work, too large.
70 LAWYERS.
n And here come the lawyers the best of the lot
e They re go like Geo. Washington, only they
l. Behold! the sweet Lilies. how gorgeous tn
l. King Solomon-s glory was nowhere you know:
% If you'd be free from the meshCs these lawyG
The tolls of these sirens will cause you to griev
II you re lucky enough to escape the law sna
" Miss Everett will catch you in the waves eff b
hair
~ FURNITURE.
HO all ye young hOuse-keepers, prospective
Come right around to Kratz's and make your fl
deal;
Here's bureaus and tables and cradles and all.
And brisk little Nell TO attend to your call
mo flies on the stock and nothing Ike rats
About any goods that are handled by Kratz.
He'll furnish a cradle for babyhOOas days
And whatever you want along LIES devious wa.
re And in nice casket when LIES Journeys end
You can ride TO your grave in q heaFse that
air splendid.
HARNESS.
IfyOu wish any harness just go 10 Tom Page,
I His splendid new styles are the fancy ana RAGE
Like a good honest fellow he blows his own br
And he'll give you bargain as sure as You