The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1890-09-14
CONFIDENTIAL CHAT.

CONFIDENTIAL CHAT.
The first thing Chicago did with the
Worlds fair was to break it in two
Chauncy Depew made a bad strike for the
presidency.
| Will the city council get the garbage out
Of town. 1t is more important than paving
Vhe streets with gold A person can live
on muddy street, but cannot do anything
but die on garbage heap. Dlphtheria, the
avenger of bad sanitary regulations, is en-
tirely too promiscuous and every mother
with babe should await on the derelict
council with her infant in her arms and
labor with them. The city council should be
held responsible for nine tenths of the
deaths from diphtheria, and an occasional
Indictment for being accessory to the act
might arouse them to action.
| Reciprocity is free trade by the spiggot
instead Of the bunghole. Cleveland's
tariff reform message was gimlet hole
that let the generated gasses out ard saved
the barrel from bursting. The retailer
draws on the spiggot while the wholesale
merchant uses the bunghole. The retail
reformers are getting there by inches and
may in time succeed in drawing out the
surplus Of American barrelled-up protec-
ton hoped industries and give them the
earth.
The coroner's verdict of mo one to
bame'' is easily rendered and as readily
forgotten. The death Of an honest man on
the city works through no fault of his own
should not be so easily dismissed. The
plan OF driving tunnels through sandbanks
is not safe one nor productive of longev-
ity to the men who work in them. Had the
ditch been properly timbered it would not
have caved in. Properly braced implies
sufficient timber TO resist the inward pres
sure of the earth.
The word "plunger" appears with alarm
ing frequency in one of our daily journals
Mr. Erb, who is as fond of a sjoke as his
brother. the major, registered at the Walker
| house under fictitious name and passed
Tor some time as al entire stranger. The
major noticed resemblance and was per-
picked to know who the deuce it was that
looked like him. After letting the thing
run for some time, the brother asked the
major what he would have That settled
| it. The two brothers fell together and en-
braced each other. Mr.. Erb has been To-
Gated in Northeastern Kansas and may con
| cIude to locate here, as he likes Salt Lake
much better than the blizzard be. blown
grasshopper state
| 1t will require several extra blocks to ac-
commodate the increased demand for
gambling rooms.
| 1t is intimated that the grand jury has
| under consideration the puzzling question,
| whether or not to set down upon the houses
| of prostitution, the gambling dens, and the
Sunday liquor sellers. Within stones
throw of the grand jury rooms there is ma
terial enough to make several indictments.
Ii any evidence is needed now as to
| whether or not houses of prostitution do
| exist in this city, it will be merely neces-
| sary to subpoena the chief members of the
police force.
was very much struck, the other day,
| by the appearance on the street of a peat
| and dasnty little lady, who was dallying
with big case of bills l wondered who
she was and in whose interests she was
employed. Time wore. on and one day
| there came rather timid knock at my Of
flee door. Come in," yelled, The door
gently opened, and it was she whom I had
seen on the street few days previous. 1
wondered what business she could have
with me. My reveree was cut short.
| SIS this Mr.. -" she asked
at is" was the reply
| "Well, left small bill here few DAYS
ago. 'vn-
Yves, what kind of, a bil!p
| "F'rom the laundry" r
ooh, yes. l remember it now" replied.
and the mean man in the next room saws
he never saw me ''shell out' so quickly be
| fore AS the fairy football echoed lightly
| along the hallway, the Mean Man turned
| to me and said: "If she has the same sue
cess with all the patrons of the laundry as
she has had with you, they win find her
| treasure worth having" l acknowledged
| the corn.
have it upon the best of authority that
| the whole cause of the delay in the con-
struction of the city and county building is
because Apponyi didn't vote the Liberal
ticket. l wonder whether it is fact that
several of the city councillors are in favor
of paying the architect his 215 per cent. on
the cost of construction, rather than let
him finish his contract, which he stands
prepared to do!
| Councilman Coin was right when he said
last evening that the action of the city coun-
Gil, sitting as an alleged board of eaualiza
ton, in refusing to reduce the assessments
on the worthy building and loan societies,
might have the effect of driving them out
of business, and if So that it would be a
public calamity. l admire the councillor
for the manly stand he took upon this very
important question; the public generally
will be at his back.
"Get money, my son; get money; hon
estly, if you can, but - get money! is
the advice that an old Scotchman is re-
ported to have given his son. In the mat
| ter of equalization, it looks as though the
city councillors were all sons of Scotchmen.
Senator Tabor may be progressive cit-
H., ~ bo T.