St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1890-01-07
DESIGNING UNCLE JOHN.
S.. James Budget.

10 u UCIS JONI, we cn!luTcu Cdileu HltH
uncle. The real fact is that he was our
great uncle. and my father was entitled
to the reverSion of 900 on his death.
1t was like the house that Jack
built; if it hadn't been for
Uncle John and the reversion, my
father would have consented TO work
like the rest of mankind. If he had
submitted to the common lot, | should
have had a proper education: and if
had had proper education, my fate
might have been different and happier.
Ny great uncle never did anything for
any OF us. My father used to 90 to see
him occasionally: and when he came
back he was always depressed
for several days. "Uncle John
is looking younger than ever; l
shall never come into that money, my
boy" he would say to me in melan-
chOly tone. Low diet and hope de-
ferred, my boy, have made wreck Of
me-" Tie might have added dizziness
and whisky and water.'0 He'll out
live me. my boy; Pm sure he will. But
you've got fine constitution, and, bar
accidents, you'll come into it after ALL
And SO in due course my father died
and / was left an orphan. On his DEATH
bed he gave me my Uncle Johns ad-
dress. Its all l can do for You, JO-
Seph. my boy" he said, land 1t isn't
.much." And as soon as the breath was
out Of my fathers body the landlord
came in and seized the furniture; and |.
having no other home in the world,
proceeded to seek my only living
relative, Uncle John. ] had new
er seen my Uncle John. He
fathnr q hos
been stated; but though | had never
seen him, knew all about him. Hes
all hair and spectacles," my father had
said, land he wears a cap with flaps to
it,"
Now. some six or seven years prior to
my fathers death, Uncle John had mar
ried his cook. When my father heard
Of that event he was overjoyed. That's
the last straw, Joseph, my boy"
my father had said to me; "thatll
settle him. Why, she's q regular
in his calculations. On his next visit TO
my uncle John he declared that the old
man was gaining t1esh:" and then he
quarreled with the horse grenadier.
Of course it was over the annual 95
note, which was all that my father ever
succeeded in extracting from his rel
alive. The fact is that it
was to to the cooks interest to
keep Uncle John alive; for besides the
$4,000 that was to cCme to us on
his death there was nothing but his
furniture and his savings. AS Uncle
Johns widow.the cooks position would
be precariOuS one; but, with one bed
rleden old man to keep out of $3.50
year. as Uncle Johns wife, the cook
had a very good bargain.
1t was fine morning in June when
screwed my courage up to the sticking
point, and in the interests of my three
sisters, whom | had to keep on so shl-
lungs week, determined to call on
my Uncle John and try and extract the
annual "fiver." My Uncle Johns
house was in Araminta terrace, HoX-
ton. l knocked gently at the door, lest
| should disturb my bedridden uncle: Il
slatternly girl opened it on the chain
and asked my business.
"Pve called to see Mr.. WOrleybone,
my uncle" | replied. As soon as had
! said the words look of terror passed
across the girls face.
Cant you call in an hour?" said the
girl; 1.-THE old gentleman's asleep, L
| think"
''If you don't mind. | think I'd like to
! come in and see my aunt" | replied.
Mothers out" said the slatterniy
| gentleman"
She didn't let me in, though; she left
| me waiting on the doorstep, and she
| left the door upon the cham. She
wasn't gone long; and when she re-
turned she opened the door slowly
enough, and, ushering me into little
| front parlnr, she said: "Will You please
to take chair, and MIR. Worley bone
| Will see you III minute or two"
Il I 7
waited. The houses in the Araminta
terrace are little two-story dwellings,,
masterpieces of the jerry-builder's art.
| | could hear great running about i'll
| the floor above and the trampling of
| heavy footsteps, which, il l hadn't
known that Mrs. Worleybone was out,
/ should have taken for those of my
aunt, the horse -dier.
Twill you step up, please" said the
slatternly girl, as she flung the door
| open. and | followed her to the first
| floor front. my uncle's bedroom.
As entered the room | detected a
strong odor of spirits. The Venetian
blinds were drawn down, and in addi-
| ton, there were heavy curtains to the
| window which made the room unpleas-
| antly dark.
ii hope l find you well, Uncle John,''
l SAID, walking towards the bed; and
| husky voice answered me from the
| pillows.
81 amt long for this world. Joseph.
| Please to take q chair"
Now, for the last ten years ] knew
| perfectly well that my Uncle John had
been in the habit of replying to my
| fathers inquiries after his health in
| these very words. At first | hadn't
been able to see my Uncle John. but
as my eyes grew accustomed to the dim
religious light of my uncle's bed room,
| perceived That my Uncle John was as
my father had described him, veneer
able old man, all white hair and specta-
cles, wearing tapped cap.
"My sisters sent their duty and re-
| spects. sir,'' | said.
And then my uncle gave a sort of
grunt.
''Don't you find the room little dark,
| Uncle john" remarked.
Its on account of my poor eyes, Ie-
piled my Uncle John, in the hoarse
whisper that seemed haUitual with hi m,
that's why Pm forced to wear these
green spectacles," he said.
How stupid was to have forgotten
my uncle's weakness of vision.
Then there was long silence, which
was broken by my Uncle John.
lyon amt thinking of marrying, Jo-
seph, are you?" said my uncle.
"Why. bless me, no, uncle" I4eplied.
'Tve only 30shilhngs week, and there
are four of u.s.
But if she was an heiress. Joseph?'
crOaked my uncle.
"l'm open to an heiress," I replied.
"That was likely girl that opened
the door for you, nephew Joseph" said
my Uncle John. "Tn very fond of
that likely girl" he went on. land she's
an heiress," added my uncle mystic
riously, land she's sort of a girl as
'ud make any young man happy"
l didn't quite see myself how the
slatternly girl was calculated to make
! any young man happy. but / remem-
bered that she was my uncle's step
| daugh.er; so remarked namely,
She's spanking young woman. sir.''
''She's all that, nephew" croaked out
my uncle. She's the very image of
1 her LlasSnl innLlnr and lnok hnu, ha nr,1