The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-10-06
BRIGHT BITS.
To shaking hands the candidate
Doth now hims If betake-
He later learns. alas, too late,
Whose given him the shake!


Doth now himssif betake-
He later learns. alas too late,
Whose given him the shake
-.- -vt'itts0ltrg Dispatch.
THE FOOL is pleased with himself; the wise
man dissatisfied. Score ons Tor the fool-Te1ds
Sifttn0s.
UNLESS a man is agreeable to all the women
he meets they go arouad plying his wife,
AtchtsOn Globe.
81 Amt COIN to say my prayers"
"Why not, Willie?'
oh what's the use? Every blame thing I
ask for amt good for me. "-Ne,o York Herald.
Horse DEArER-"Coullt. Won had bother buv
that horse, He is perfectly sound"
4 believe you. If he hadn't been sound he
would never have lived to such an age-FIieg-
ende Batter.
"WHERE are YOU going, my lusty man,
With the bucket OF chalk and the big tin can.
Down the path that leads to the brook-swept
glade?'
Tn going milkin', sir he said.-Jester.
FIRST LITTLE GIRL.-Don't you associate with
| thai little girlg Second Little Girl-No. ind ed
| We don't move in the same set at all Her
| family is below First L. Care they?
| Second L. G.-Yes They live in the fiat above
us.-Good NelCs
KNowITT-rm pretty well posted, let me tell
you. l really find it a burden to carry around
Bronson-H'm It's lucky for you that you
don't have to carry around what you don't
| know.-Lioht.
HuNoHIsT My output of jokes is now hun
| dred week. s'1
Frlend-And what of the returns?
About ninety"
"Dollars?"
mo; Jokes n-HdrpeY's Bazdr
LADY ordering a glass of beer in very fine
| restaurant in very good German, asks, she
pays the waiter 'Parlez-vous francais?" But
the waiter cuts short all attempts at amcable
conversation with the freezing reply, 20 YES
mum, but not when the bill is as small as this "
fHegende Btdtter.
A GROCER at lKeene, n. H., had sold powder
at retail by lanplig u for over twenty years
and he never found fault if the crowd in the
store was smoking while he poured out the little
grains Ono night last week, however-whisn!
bang -boom! Three men badly hurt-no
more powder-no more grocery-no insurance
-Detott Free Press.
HARRY-Dearest, l love you better than any
| one on earth. II you will consent to be mine l
will DO your humble slave till death calls me
hence Ny heart is wholly yours. 1 love you
distractedly. If this does not satisfy you of my
devotion what wills
Dearest-Cash
She was saeslady, and the word came to
her ruby lips by force of habit. But it came
like a cruel blow and Harry, with a great gnlp
of sorrow, turned away and went out into e
silent night to tell his griefs to the cold unfee-
ing stars in the ebon vault above.-6oston
Transcript.
Hoober. who stammers when embarrassed
have y-y-y-you ever b-b-b-been in S SIS ain"
Sir! exclaimed the indignant Mrs Jones.
"Hh-h-ave you ever b-b-b-bsen in-in-iu-in
S-S-Sain-in SIS Sain-have y-y-y-y-you ever
BIB BIB been in Sain-ii-ii-n Sain-"
How dare you, sir?" almost screamed the Of
Tended woman as she got up and went to the
other sids of the room.
Mr.. Hoober, aid the hostess shortly after
ward, Mrs; Jones complains that you have
been eedingly rude and impolite.
- was only trying to ask her, Mrs. Billus,"
explained the unhappy young man. IF sh- sh-
sh-she had ever been in S-S-S-Saint Louis. -
Chicago Tribune.