Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1890-09-04

THE flannel shirt is shrinking out of sight.
CLASSIC ground is dirt cheap in Athens.
The land on which stood the Academy of Plato
is in the market. The reserved price is only
Sl1, 900. The real estate agents there are not
such high flyers as their Pittsburg brethren.
RUMoR is reckless rogue.
WHEN select few combine to accomplish a
given object the public call it ring, and hint
at shady and sharp transactions. Certainly a
ring cannot be square.
ALL the home coming crowds have the grip.
PITTsBURG is building many castles in the
air. All stand on firm foundations, however.
MCGINTY has gone to meet Tom Collins He's
no longer fooling thee.
The peanut stands will experience a boom
soon. The country cousin is preparing to visit
the Exposition.
SOME sensible New orkers are inducing bar
bers to stop rubbing the lather into long suffer-
ing faces with their hands. This is a reform in
the right direction. Why BARRIERS persist in
giving the face a massage which makes the
jaw bones ache is mystery which non-shavers
cannot fathom. People scientifically inclined
the least soften it. The lather does the busi-
ness. You have the remedy in your own hands
Let's ask the BARRIERS to lather and shave.
IT is called Liberty street. Is this why the
big railroad companies are taking such liberties
with it?
THE best stores are not always located on the
sunny side of the street.
SOME Iew conceits are shown by the window
dressers.
THE homemade girl is superior to the tailor
made article.
FASHION, to use police vulgarism, Is a
bunko steerer.
JUDGING from the displays in the Wholesale
milliners windows, birds will be popular trim
ming for bonnets this wirter. Look for your
self.
THE Standard Oil office on Fourth avenue is
power house.
MISFORTUNE like twins comes in pairs.
GIRLS who want to look chic most wear their
hat slightly on one side. This is English, girls.
LONG nights mean longer gas bills.
IF you want to work up an appetite for
breakfast take stroll through the markets
these fine mornings.
MARRIED men are expected to wear wedding
rings now. This is also English, me boy.
A SIGN on Fifth avenue reads High School
Books" The text book trust must be getting
in It's work.
THE yachting suit makes girl look IA keish.
The Jockey like cap makes her look roguish.
The vest, jacket and collar makes her look
mannish. The tailor-made suit makes her look
dudish. The paint. powder and baby-stare
makes her look foolish.
THE grip is not like lightning. It strikes
twice in the same place.
A CANE is a stick and an overcoat is top
per this season, you know.
THE joke about the red-headed girl and the
white roadster is horse chestnut.
The summer diving bellies are evening bellies
now.
JOHNNY MORGAN grinds the organ-and SO
does NJ. s. O.
CHANGES in the real estate face of Pittsburc
are going on everywhere except at the Point
and the commission house section of Liberty
street. Get move on. gentlemen, and keep
up with the procession
You can sober up a drunken man, but can
you keep him sober?
ACTOR SULLIVAN was laughed at in New
York How it must gall the giant to be jeered
under circumstances which prevent his right
from reaching out for the jeerer's jugular.
IF your name is not on the registry list to-
day you cannot drop ballot in the slot next
November.
SOME dyed-in-the-wool Republican organs
say Arkansas is disgraced State. It's Demo-
cratic, you know.
WHEN Old Sol breaks through the fog
banks these murky mornings he seems to say
"You will not be mist"
SEPTEMBER has made q fine start. The
cool, calm, bright days and moonlit nights
mako Nature smile and induce lovers to linger
on the back porches. But perhaps it will rain,
hail and cyclonize before this paragraph is
printed. Weather, like the oil market, is
mighty uncertain.
WHAT is home without newspaper.
THEY don't say Lets have a beer'' now. It's
Lets drop q nickel in the SLOT" This is not
English.
AN elephants trunk will hold the modern
burlesque stars wardrobe.
If you like good music py the band 60 to the
Exposition. TIE cornet soloist caught on in
the second number last night.
MACHINERY HALL will get there in few
days. Push it along during the intermissions.
THE House end of Congress is better than
three-ringed circus. When Reeds away the
rascals play.
THE Exposition caught on immensely.
INNS Band belongs to the N, @. s. NJ Y.
They are not n. 6. however.
JUDGING from the crowds, all Spads must
lead to the Exposition.
WILLIE WINKLE.
ENORMOUS RAIDS ON FORESTS.
L.