The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1890-03-13
NOT SUITED AT ALL.
A Tale of Matrimonial ADVERTISE
ment and a Trifiing Mistake.

"But / really think / am quite old and
experienced enough to manage these
affairs for myself. And I've heard Of a
great many happy marriages that have
been arranged just in this way. To be
sure, it is running a risk; but, after all,
life is a lottery, and one has TO take
things as they come, in this world"
Miss Malvina Maroon generally known
as ''MaIly" by her friends and acquaint-
ances) was sitting in a very stiff backed
chair, in the best room of the little
country tavern at Observation-Disclosures
The stage had been in for an hour at
least, and Miss Maroon was tired of wait
ing. She had chirped to the thrush in
his cage, counted all the little red balls
on the Jerusalem cherry tree in the
window, and looked as the picture Of the
'sSigning of the Declaration OF Independ-
ence'' until she knew every wig and
buckled shoe by heart, and still nobody
had come to meet her. She was begin
ming to feel a little uneasy at this unex-
pected delay. The landlord had peeped
at her, under pretense of coming to fill
up the big stone pitcher with fresh cab
bage roses; the landlady had courtesied
at the door, and asked her if she should
cook a little piece of steak or a dish of
brook trout for her dinner.
81 don't expect to be here to dinner"
said Miss Maroon, with dignity.
"Oh!" said the ~landlady.
"My friends will doubtless be here to
meet me in a very few minutes . ex-
planned Miss Maroon, glancing at the
clock.
"Ah!" said the landlady.
But this was where Miss Maroon had
intrenched somewhat on the strict truth.
She had no friends at Infield-on-the-
Hudson. She had come hereunder
our breath be it spoken-with the des-
perate resolve to answer a matrimonial
advertisement. She had seen it in the
paper. She had read it twice over and
rather liked the way in which it was
worded. She had asked herself, sWhy
not?' and echo had returned no unfavor-
able response. And she had, so to speak,
taken her fate into her own hands and
come boldly to nfield-on-the-Hudson
But now, as the moments sped by, she
wac 0SSAAAAiiS w @ 6CSACbiI oilCooJs
Suppose there should be any mistake?
Suppose the advertiser should be suited"
already? Suppose any number of awk-
ward circumstances to have interposed
themselves in the way of her welfare?
But, Just as she was beginning to make
herself thoroughly uncomfortable, there
came a tap, tap at the door, and in
walked a stout, short man with a red
necktie and a countenance to match!
Lady from New York; said this per-
sonage, without the least embarrassment.
Miss Maroon rose with dignity. Eyes,
sir" said she.
He was not exactly ~aristocratic look
ing. There was no mistake about that.
He wore no gloves, and his hands were
stumpy and freckled-his hair stuck up
like the bristles of the fretful porcupine,
and his face, although good natured,
bore in it no trace Of ancient blood or
or lofty lineage! But Miss Maroon be-
thought herself of the old proverb about
the deceitfulness OF appearances, and
plucked up spirit.
You saw the advertisement, / sup
pose?:' said the stout man.
81 did, sir" said Miss Maroon.
"Think you'll SUITE questioned the
stout man.
.'Sir?' said Miss Maroon.
Because he's a little PECULIAR" ex-
planned the man; "and it amt everybody
meets his views, you see!'
"Oh!' said Miss Maroon, a light break
ing in upon her darkness, ''then you are
not the party himself?'
sob, no." said the stout man. "No;
I'm the business mani l settle everything
for him."
81 should prefer negotiating with prin-
cipals,' said Miss Maroon, drawing her
self up.
ssIt's the usual way we does it," re
marked her interlocutor, picking a broom
splint from the floor, and beginning to
chew it.
''The usual way?7 repeated Miss Ma
room, more puzzled than ever. MAY !
ask how often the-the gentleman has
been married befores"
.'Neyer been married in his life" said
the stout man. circumstances was
against it, you see"
ssOh!' said Miss Maroon.
"He amt hard to manage" said the
stout man. .'Them as he takes a fancy
to can do most anything with him."
Miss Maroon cast down her eyes and
simpered at this.
Ibid you bring any references said
the stout man, abruptly.
"References!' echoed Miss Maroon.
Ever had any experience?7 he went on.
ssSir.' said Miss Maroon. II really
don't quite underestimate
"Your age seems quite suitable" said
the man. 81 calculate you're about 40,
amt you? We couldn't give you many
holidays, nor Sundays out, but for a
good, regular, steady place.
'sStop," cried Miss Maroon, sdo stopl
I don't at all know what you're talking
about. MISUNDERSTANDING out! I'd have
you to know that l am no housemaid
looking for a place. And as for being 40
years old, my appearance must be very
deceptive if you take me for anywhere
near that age. am only six-and-thirty.'
.sThree or four years way or the