Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-02-21
HEZEk
Walk.
a Business M"m's -adce"t"res ia Firth.
-ircstuc 0aG

V-iLN.
a business M"M's -sdceMt"yes ia Firth
ArcM"c 1mG Brood,rau.
Hezekiah Budlong is the name
OF aportly business man who lives
IN a fashionable block in West Steenth
street. Now, Hezekiah :.has lately
been reading about the impor.
lance Of walking as =. an exer-
else, and aftcr thinking the matter over.
ne determined TO walk every day from
his house to his Office. So the other
morning, after making his will and bid
ding goodbye to his family-for Heze-
klah is a m%ethodical mamie sailed
out from his elegant home with the
citation and the anxiety that great ex-
plorers always feel.
He swore softly to himself when the
butler OF his neighbor, Jinks, who was
cleaning the sidewalks, swept about
half a bucket of water ON him. But
when two other buffers did the same
thing before he got to Fifth avenue his
language became not only explosive.
but extremely audible. Inasmuch.
however, as it was raining so hard that
an umbrella was useless, he finally n
cluded that he would get wet anyhow,
and therefore the modus operandi was a
matter of small consequence.
Ao %1o~ A....-1 ~ S.c
was beginning to enjoy the stroll down
that Justly admired th%oroughfare when
he was sickened by the odor from au
exposed and leaking sewer pipe. But
he didn't have time to think Of that
long before his nostrils were assailed by
another odor equally vile. which came
from a wagon filed with garbage of an
evidently ancient vintage. Just at this
moment, too, he passed all ashman, who
was in the act of en1ptying a. large.
sized ashcan. As the rain had ceased
and the wind had come up, Nh. Bud
longs wet garments were at once COW
cred with athick coating of the best
grade of Lehigh Valley red ashes.
The ruin to his clothes was bad
enough, but what tried Hezekiah's tenn
per most was. that the ashes blinded
him so that he did not see a window.
washer who was using one of those long.
handled scrubbers with great vigor and
energy. Of course, therefore, Hcze.
kiah came in collision with him. for i,
is a well-known fact that no window.
washer ever looks out for pedestrians
he works on the theory that he own.
the sidewalk and the breadth thereof
The result Of the collision was thai
Hezekiah was hit on the nose with the
end of the long pole. This aroused the
indignation Of the honest window
washer, who Denounced him as a vile
"chump," Ser gittin' in der way NJ
further mishaps occurred until Heze
kiah was crossing to Broadway, wher
he slipped in the slime which cover tina
historic street, and came within an &C.
Of being run v by a street car ant
a brewery wagon.
After going into a barber shop ant
paying a quarter to have his clothe.
brushed, he pursued his journey down
Broadway, He had not gone far before
a subway worker hit him in the stomach
with a shovelful Of odoriferous dirt. and
while he was giving the grinning navy
q piece Of his mind, q falling electric
wire hit him on the head. Naturally.
he expostulated with the careless work
man .who had dropped the wire, but the
only reply Of that individual was, ooh,
wot's der matter wild yer; Der wires
dead" This retort was hugely enjoyed
by all the bystanders, and Hezekiah
felt that he was looked upon as q crank
of the worst kind.
1t would be impossible to relate all
the troubles of Hezekiah on this terri
be trip. He finally reached his Office
more dead than alive, and it was fully
a week before he recovered from the
effects of his rash adventure. He has
not since tried to walk down town, and
it is needless to say, he has firmly re-
solved never to dose again.--N 7. T''i-
bune.
HOW Walk.