Iron County register., 1890-03-27
AN APRIL FOOL.
WAS in a aprivate board

To play them some good trick,
We lay awake night after night
To think of something sleek;
Nhen IN the morning all were met
And each revealed her plot,
AS with one voice they all agreed
That mine went to the spot.
The day We chose was April Ist
The time the MONDAY hour:
MeanWhlIe we looked as innocent
And harmless as a flower
The time was come; each man sat down
with heavy, 1ong-drawn sigh;
Albeit underneath we saw
A twinkle in each eye;
They looked for cotton in the ,1fe
For corn-bread frosted thick
For napkins sewed together fast
The sponge-cake loaf brick:
For drinking water peppered strong,
And beefsteak seasoned sweet;
In fact, suspicion lurked about
What'e they touch or eat;
But when the meal in safety passed
They rose with grateful sigh,
And little dreamed the blow they feared
Would catch on" by and by;
For while they ate with cautious fear,
4: Jest then the sword might fall,
One of US stealthily did slip
Round to the entrance hall,
And warmly pressed with fingers deft
In each hat hanging there
"A piece of shoemaker's wax
To lay against their hair
Twas one OF those warm days in snring
That forecast summer heat;
But, unsuspecting, out they go
Upon the sunny street.
AS one went sauntering jauntily,
Who should he chance to meet
But fair Miss Blank, q lovely girl
And one he thought real sweet.
He threw his toothpick on the walk,
All smiles he did appear,
He tried to raise his hat. but 10!
It stuck fast to his ear.
The next a well-llnOwn banking clerk
Returning to his biz,
Essayed his derby to remove
Why, what in thunder-s this."
He paused-glanced ro"nd him in disrnay-
BY Iove. but this is pat;
Those horrfd girls have somehow glued
My hair fast to my hat,''
He sat him down. resigned to fate
His hat upon his head:
Soon in walked Mr. President
And to him coldly said:
" Have you been on a lark, young man
Or have you got cold:''
"Dear sir, beg you will excuse
To tell the truth, I'm sold!
Perhaps you'll kindly bear in mind
What day It's said to be-
And some one, sir, has made YOU see
An april fool of me-
The next, a man of real estate
Was asked to call at two
Upon widow, young and rich,
Who would her lease renew;
He rang the bell. then Strengthened up
To bend him like a bow,
With hat in hand and blandest smile
As agents do, you know
She came; he ierked and pulled and tugged,
And twisted in despair,
Made desperate effort-futile all
1t stuck as if grown there;
She stood in frigid dignity
And smiling scorn the while,
Although she scarcely could repress
\ naughty, witheriEs smile;
But presently he found his voice,
Then frantically he spoke:
"I crave your pardon. madame, I'm
The victim of n joke
And as he backed himself a-down
Those steps with eager haste
He took his spotless handkerchief,
And mopped his sweltering face;
His swear-words were original
\ list beyond define;
i thanked my stars he knew not tn
The trick was one of mine.
But what befell each one in turn
For all met hapless fate
/ fear 'twould weary you to read,
The writer to relate.
Suffice to say, they cNme to tea,
Their hats they slowly dofT;
For every mothers son of them
Had all their hair cut Off
Hannah NJ. Kohaus, in Inter Ocean.