Thomas County cat., 1890-01-23
UNCLE THOMAS.
A Tramp Who Worked the "Geat1e0aA"
Racket bat Wsarssa Of IL

A Tramp Who W0rked the 'Gent1e0aA"
Racket bat Wsazssa Of Il
The city marshal of q small town in Indi
ana having informed me that he had bad
exposito." IN the town lookup, and that
could see him il l 50 desired, it was only nat
ural that curiosity should be aroused. | went
over to find clean shaven, respectable look
ing man in broadcloth, and when we had been
left alone, on pretense that he wanted to
consult ;egal authority" he offered me 4
cigar, crossed his legs. and complacently 10
marked:
"Well, the bottom has dropped cut at last,
and I'm burned glad Of it. hain't felt q bit
happy for the last three months Look at
me! Dye 'spose q decent tramp would rec
ognize or have anything to do with me
logged out in this fashion. Regular broad
cloth, this suit is. and I've got ON regular
undershirt, same as governors wear. and reg
ular socks and linen collars. Is It any won
der ! hain't had good nights sleep i'll long
weeks, and that my liver is out of order and
my system running downT
"You are not what you seema" observed
by way of encouragement
"You've hit the bulls eye. old man! Say,
it's too funny for anything when l think 1t
over. Sometimes I've laughed till my sides
ached. and then again I've bin SO lonesome
that it seemed as if must fy."
'Go on with the tale"
He noted the time by a new silver watch,
settled himself back on the bench, and be-
gan:
Down here about three miles lives an old
maid nigh onto 50 years old She owns the
farm, and a man cousin of hers works 1t.
One night last spring struck the place for a
cold supper, and the door was hardly open
before Martha flung her arms about my neck
and kissed and hugged until Jim, the cousin,
had to pull her off,"
Mistaken Identify" remarked.
Exactly. Seems that they had ON Uncle
Thomas off somewhere, and that he was sup
posed to be rich and eccentric, and that a
fortune teller had told 'em he would come
along in disguise. They tumbled to me for
the old eccentric, and it wasn't over two
. toots Of the whistle before was onto the
racket They didn't ask me any hard ques-
tions, but stuffed me full of good things,
piled me into feather bed. kissed me good
night, and that was the beginning of a down
ward career which has landed me where
am. Last night, when l struck this Jail,
began to feel at home for the first time in
twelve weeks. If only had my old duds
my happiness would be complete"
Ibid it take them three months to find
that you were not their Uncle Thomas"
ut did. They thought l was deceiving
them about my riches, and testing them to
see if they were worthy. They bought me
this watch, clothes, cane, and a lot of other
stuff, and was fed on the fat of the Land.
Gained thirty-two solid pounds to prove it.
l used to long to get back into the old duds,
and to sleep under a straw stack and to steal
apples and encounter bulldogs, but had to
play nv part. knew that had q soft
thing, and prudence warned me to hang on
to it."
"How did they discover your identityT'
"Well, she went Off to a neighbors, and
Jim was working in back lot. Along came
three of the boys, and Wis so glad to see
'em that hugged each one in my arms and
then invited 'em into the house. They had
eaten and drank their fill and gone before l
heard anything drop. l told 'em who was
and what a snap had, and I'll he banged if
Jim, who had come up for water, didn't hear
it ALL He posted right OF to town, got the
officers, and here am. l want you to do me
q favor"
"Wellr
They'll hev to turn mo loose, for hain't
broken no law. want to send these clothes
and this watch back to Martha and Jim, and ]
want you to get me something more in keep.
ing with my station-something an old tramp
will feel at home in. I've been guilty Of de-
ception, but l really couldn't help myself.
It's tie first time ever put on clean shirts
once a week, washed my face once a day, and
tried to sleep respectfully, and l promise you
it shau't happen again. It's human to err,
you know"
arranged at the hotel for some old clothes
and carried them over, and as he united the
bundle Uncle Thomas" said:
Most too respectable, but I'll doctor 'em q
little. A thousand thanks to you. By Iais
time tomorrow III be ten miles away, dodS-
ing the dog at the gate and working the back
door for cold vittles. Won't it seem good!
Won't l roll up into ball and have q solid
old snooze in some fence corner tomorrow
night! Thanks, again. But for your disin-
terested kindness l might have been COM
PEELED to go out of here all dressed up, and
under false pretcnses, and it would have
taken NE a month to convince the boys that
was born to the purfesh, and loved it for
itself alone" New York Sun.