Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1890-06-29
SAGES WHO ADVISE.
Sometimes They Are Worth Listening
to-, but More Often Not
THE INEXPERIENCED TALK MOST.
Theoretical Nonsense Won't Stand Against
Practical Sense.
A FEW ILLUSTRATIONS OF THE FACT
rwR1rrEN FOR THE p1srArcH.l


grown.up English speaking people. I tried
to soothe a small friend OF mine in tina: way
once, and her reply epitomized large share
OF the philosophy of human life: "It's easy
for them that's got nothing the matter with
'em to say never mindi"
1t is a fact. universally known and very
generally admitted, that the place to have a
boil is on some other persons nose. So long
as you have it there you know exactly how
to treat it, and can study it in a spirit de-
void of all narrow W prejudice; whereas if
you have it elsewhere-on your own nose,
for example-yop find much difficulty in
maintaining that calm balance of mind
which is so essential to the proper consid-
Grafton of boils, as of other affecting ills.
l forget whether it was Charles Lamb, or
Douglass Jerrold, or neither of them, who
said that he never read a book before re-
viewing it because it prejudices man soP'
The People Who Give Advice.
Truly think all these things must have
been considered by many of the people who
thrust so much advice upon US by word Of
mouth and by stroke of pen. A little exam
ination of their teachings brings con viction
telling US just how to manage our children;
women who live in boarding houses give
copious counsel to housekeepers; men who
never earned a dollar or saved cent be-
cause of necessity, tell us how to economize;
people who never go from home tell us how
to travel with the greatest comfort and
profit; persons living on the equator give in
structions for finding the North Pole, and
millionaires preach contentment to the very
poor.
Not all of our advice comes from such un-
practiced sources; but vast amount of it
can be explained in no other way, unless we
would be uncharitable to those who bestow
it. Well, why complain? There are GER
tain principles which govern every con-
dition of life, and those principles can be
understood through study. Experience is
not always necessary. A man don't have to
be in a railroad wreck to help other people
out of it. A rich man may understand the
governing forces OF poverty better than a
poor man. A person who never painted a
picture may know more about art than an
other who earns his bread by it. A woman
who never scrubbed floor may know ex-
actly what is essential to the perfection of
housekeeping. In short, the looker.on sees
more OF the game than the players; and in
the philosophical division of labor it is meet
that he should give advice, and that the
others should follow it.
Experience of a House Wife.
Perhaps. But on the other hand practical
conditions are apt to have their way in spite
of theories The man who never was in the
water cannot be very reliable instructor in
swimming; and the woman who never saw a
washboard is not likely to give very yalu-
able advice about washing day. In one of
her rare moments of leisure surprised
busy house wife with pencil and paper in
her hands. She had just finished a calcula-
ton, and announced the result with sigh
and smile.
81 find the day would have to be Just 4S
hours long," she said. 'That would give
me At hours and half for work, and half
an hour for sleep. By not polishing the
bottom Of my teakettle might squeeze in
an hours sleep. But the day would have
to be 4S hours long any way. And that
had children, every day would have to run
over into next week-or else I'd have to
leave some OF the things undone."
She pointed to pile OF periodicals be-
side her. 'I've been studying series of
household articles here. They were writ
ten for the benefit of women who have to do
their own work, and the object Is to estab-
lish such thorough system that everv
minute may be turned to the best
possible account. suppose you
have read just such things. Pretty
nearly everything that's printed has them
in one shape or another. This writer fairly
revels in detail. 1 think it must be a
man. A woman who knew so much would
know little more. Anyhow he tells ex-
actly what must be done, exactly how to do
it, and exactly when, so as to keep the sys-
tenn straight.
"And under this system the woman who
does her own work is to spend the latter
part of every day dressed up. She is to |
keep up with her church work; leave no So
cial duty unattended to; keep abreast of the
current literature; by no means let 90 of
her music; keep her accounts to the smallest |
decimal point; take up special subject for
study or reading; entertain now and then;
keep supply of smiles to give her hus-
band the minute he come in; and whatever
else happens, never let her husband see her |
in her kitchen dress. Don't it sound de- |
lightful? Well, all that is part of the sys-
tenn.
She Figured up the Time.
81 feel very wicked because never really |
adopted the system. But at one time or
another have done most Of the things pre-
scribed, so 1 know just about how much
time each one requires. I've made little |
list of the various duties, and opposite each
item, I've put the time it would take. Then
Eye added up and averaged the time; and L |
find that each days work would require at |
least 4711 hours. And even then I'm afraid |
John would catch me sometimes in nv |
kitchen dress, and without smile And I |
wouldn't be able to entertain as much as I'd |
like
''It's all nonsensel Here and there you
can pick out a valuable hint, but the house.
keeper who would try to carry out such
system would come to grief in short order.
Of course we'll woman can keep her house
in good trim and have some enjoyment be-
side. Plenty of them do it who never
bothered their heads with any printed
advice. But there is Just so
much strength in woman's back, and there
are Just so many hours in the day; and
every woman has to do the best she can
under those restrictions and let the rest go.
She must judge for herself what she'll let
go-whether it shall be kitchen work, So
cIal dut. music, reading, dressing up, or
those smiIes Tor her husband. I try to keep
the smiles, and as much else as l can."
This was wise woman; and if the one
who devised the system had made an esti-
mate with paper and pencil to begin with,
why, sheer he-would have been minus
he income from that series of articles.
Advice for the Sleeping Car.
My lively and philosophical friend does
not travel very much; she has not the time,
md passes are difficult to obtain. Other
wise would call her attention to very
captivating article read some time ago.
This was letter of advice addressed to all