Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1890-10-19
4 SHIFTaESS COOT.

Written for the SUNDAY UNIoN-By Len.l
II don't care; will never come back,
blamed if l will" and the speaker walked
away down the graveled walk that led
from the snug farmhouse in Howe's Hol-
low. Presume likely she would like to
run the hull consarn, and she kin without
let or Underwent from me-" he continued.
s'She won't have a chance to call me
sshiftless coot' again, blamed if she will"
So, muttering angrily as he went, he
reached the river, boarded a schooner en-
route to Boston, and worked his passage to
that city. Here he found the ship Van
dalia ready to start for California round
the Horn, and had engaged a steerage pas
sage before his temper had cooled down.
The more leisure he had the more he
brooded over his wrongs, fancied or other
wise. The salt sea breezes should have
blown away his i'll humor, but even as salt
will set color in washed colored goods,
so the sea salt in the air seemed to set and
harden his temper, already stubborn and
inherited from some pig-headed ancestor.
So the Vandalia sailed, and the man whom
we will know as Sam Saunders, for under
that name he registered, made his exit
perhaps final one-from the East.
The weather was fine and it was smooth
sailing for some time, but ah everything
was so different from the snug hitherto
happy home life. No dinner horn (really
an old conch SHELLY summoned him to a
we'll beloved boiled dinner; no menu or
bill of fare, such as he sometimes saw in
his visits to the city on business, at the
hotels he frequented. No, an ! no. But
the black steward would yell out from the
main deck, "All gemmelmeu that wish
poke and beans, lobscouse, duff or dandy
| funk will please fotch their dish to the
fo castle cuddy."
How was Sam to know he was included
| in the list of "gemmelmeQ," and that lob
scouse, although a meat and potato stew, a
familiar dish at home, was unfamiliar
under its new name. The desert of dandy
| funk was no palatable pumpkin or mince
pie, but pudding of mammoth proper.
tions, composed of bareback, molasses and
-four, and duff, plain or plumed, was a
boiled batter pudding, very hard, and of a
weight that would entitle it to the
| name "a heavy weight"
When Sam understood that he was one
of the called and chosen to bring forward
his dish, he shuffled forward, and then
took his seat on the bulwark nearest the
capstan. to chew the cud of bitter re,
Election. as he said, and tried to render the
dandy funk soft.
"Aint l like the prodigal son." he
| unused, "only not so prodigal as to go back
nuthin' as soft as husks either" he said
"But a shiftless coot amt no call to any.
thing better" and at this final bitter
thought he brought his clasp knife down
| with clatter on his tin dish.
"Hi, there" said Mike Flynn, ''ain't yer
puddin' to yer loikin? Anything wrong
with this yankee doodle dandy funk
Faith,wan needs an open countenance loikt
an alligator to swallow it; I'd call it stick
Jaw if had to boot out the bill of fare like
that haythen nagur beyant."
The men all laughed, and as Mike
balanced a piece of it on his knife, he con-
tinued, 81 till you, min, it's loike plaster
of paris, to make US waterproof inside, ii
we tumble outside, where the watkins
wet"
you've hit the NAIL" said Sam grimly
presume likely it is"
Some days when the wind was high and
the sea to match, the steward would give
each man a tin mug of molasses, and hard
tack to dip in it, when the seas they
shipped would put out the fire in the gal
ley, and it was impossible to even get tea
or coffee Then Sam thought his lines were
not cast in pleasant places, but he would
mutter, "Prodigal son warn't wus then this
! but | amt a-going back, blamed if | will
A shiftless coot, EN-" The thought of thi:
always gave him courage to bear the pres
ent ills though hard.
One day as the cabin boy was crossing the
main deck with his mug. of molasses, the
ship gave terrible lurch that sent him of
his feet to sitting posture still clinging
to the mug. The motion of the ship kept
moving him from side to side. The sailors
shouted with laughter as the boy tried to
| hold the molasses up out of harms way
but the sea proved too much for him, his
arms lost their balance and the whole mug.
ful went on his head and down his face.
''Stick to it, young feller," shouted
Mike.
81 am" shouted the boy, with both eyes
full, as he staggered blind and dripping tc
his feet. And even Sam had to laugh al
his appearance.
So the days and weeks and months
passed, and after six months sailing they
sighted Golden Gate and the land CT prom
Use, the