Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1890-10-23
PiTh AND POINT.

Dyspepsia is said to be unknown in
Japan So are boardinr houses.-Rau's
Horn.
-He--9ou are puzzle to ne -
she tcoldlyl-"Nell, you had better
give me up-"-N. Y. Herald.
-Iom--EWhat quarrelsone fellow
he IS BY the way, do you know what
his name is?" Jack - Yes Make
peace Yankee Blade.
Did you tell Sixties that I was an
infamous liar?'' NO, did no. Quite
the reverse, in fact I said you were q
famous one.'-N. Y. Sun.
Mrs Jason--''When they tie I'D z
railroad they don't actually use d rope,
do they@" Mr.. Jason-''No; II IS gen
orally done With Z string Of resolutions -
The Interior.
Mrs. Strikefre, why are you set
ting the alarm for / a. IL - My bus-
band always comes a little after that
hour. and he shau't catch me- mapping
When he comes Epoch
Marriage is, indeed, lottery"
sighed Tomnoddy, after a tiff with his
wife And We both drew prizes, re-
turned the lady. All said T, some
what modified Yes; you got q capi tai
prize and took the booty. - anesville
Signal
Mamma Ito Johnny, who has spent
his money for candy and has none left
to Guy 1op)-N'You can't eat your cake
and have it. too" Johnny-'When I've
eaten cake I would like 10 know who
has got il If ! haven't boston Tran
script
Then you have made UP your
mind young lady, never 10 get mar
ried?n Yes, sir. I'll die an old maid"
But If some young man were TO pro
pose TO you?'' An. that would be
different thing altogether"
istsche Blaetter-
And If you should ever come 10
Berlin my dear sir. you Will always
find me ready TO receive you Pray al
ways come TO my place Thanks, my
dear slr, ] am charmed TO have met you.
May ! ask f you are q hotel-keeper?'
Nc, Z photographer "-Fliegende Blat-
tar.
Adult Son-ssNotber. does girl
mean 10 encourage or discourage man
when she" Mother--'My son, there
Is no need Of going INFO details When
girl starts out 10 either encourage or
discourage a man. the man never has
any doubt about what she means -
Good News
- Scene: Uptown Palace Cafe. Group
Of -'GeniaIs'' around table Terrible
Predicament Of Colonel Nevertreat-
who, while pounding the table to en-
phasize one Of his favorite oaths, acci-
aentally touches the bell Waiter
Suddenly appearing W hat shall il
be, rtntleueu?"-
1T was growing late, and papa crept
down stairs 10 warn the young people
that It was TOO damp 10 sit outside any
longer. i don't see why you have &c
ask ne for my hand. Tom, he heard,
as he reached the door; you've been
keeping Il al the evening" Papa
quietly retired Harper Eazar.
-Capers-'I don't see why Chadband.
the minister, should have TWO months
vacation every summer. I'm sure his
work Is easy enough" Smiley-''Oi
course. his sermons are not hard tc
write; but Just think OF all the after
noon teas he has 10 90 to-" Capers-
That's So he ought 20 have three
months. America.
-Imperious Monarch ito Prime Minis
Jerl-'Order my most exalted state
robes and instruct the lord keeper o.
the p-ivy seal. the grand lord OF the
imperial bed-chambe tire grand knigh1
Of the wash-basin and all the rest o.
the chief functionaries 10 be IN readi-
ness for the coming visitor TO oU
realm" Prime Minister (trembling)-
1t shall be done. sire, Your gracious
pardon but who Is coming?" Inpe-
rious Monarch-'I don know his name,
bat he Is an American railroad ticket