Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-08-06
A COMEDY OF ERRORS.
The Tale Of Two Anglomaniac
Families in England.

The Tale Of Two Anglomaniac
Families in England.
The fast-growing custom of wealthy
New Workers coming over to England
and renting country-houses has lately
led to an amusing occurrence, the facts
of which might be profitably worked
into a scene in novel or a play. 1t
seems that two fine country-houses,
each surrounded by splendid park and
situated close to each other, in one of
the home counties, are severally owned
by certain peer whom we shall call
the Earl of Portcullis, and by a certain
baronet, whom we shall call Sir Rod
erick Blennerhassett The nobleman's
place is called Grassland Park; that of
the baronet Oakden Manor. Sometime
during the autumn months, both Lord
Portcullis and Sir Roderick, for reasons
of quite distinct character, determined
to spend the winter on the continent
and to let their houses for six months.
To that end, they put the houses in the
hands of two West End house-agents to
be let, and, ere long, satisfactory ten
ants we're found for each in the persons
of two New York families. II should
be remarked that neither house-agent
was aware that the other house was for
rent. So that when the two New York
families applied to each, one was told
that Sir Roderick was a near neighbor,
while the other was informed that the
Earl of Portcullis lived near by. A
house owned by an earl, with baronet
next door, suited one Anglomaniac down
TO the ground, while house owned by
baronet, with an earl next door, ex-
actly filed the bill for the other.
Nothing could be better. Rent, ac-
commodation, and habitable condition
were minor considerations in both
cases, and the houses were taken in
stanter.
So Grassland Park fell to Mr.. Schuy-
Ter Van Wrinkle and Oakden Manor to
Mr. Hiram Il. Bassett November saw
each gentleman with his family in resi-
dence. Now, the Van Wrinkles and
Bassetts, though both New Workers, did
not know each other. The Van Wrinkles
were in and of the world-famous -Four
Hundred. The Bassetts were not. That
was sufficient. The Van Wrinkles con-
sisted of Mr.. and Mrs. and their daugh-
ter Julia, a handsome, high-bred girl of
two and twenty, who had been nearly
but not quite belle in New York soci-
city for couple of seasons. The Bas-
sett family was made up of Mr.. and
Mrs, their daughter Dora, a pretty but
somewhat loud young lady of nineteen,
and their son Hiram r., Jr., commonly
designated among his family and init
mate friends eli"
Let us bark back to November, when
the Van Wrinkles and Bassetts have
been in residence about fortnight.
Pm considerably disappointed, says
Mrs. Bassett. one morning at breakfast;
ave been overhauling the card-receiv-
er and find there isn't single title
among them all"
"All double ones, eh?" asks Hi, who
thinks himself wit.
Ills mother does not deign TO notice
him; Mr. Bassett reads in silence the
London morning paper while he
eats (he could not do a more un- En-
glish thing IL he tried), and Dora says:
"How very provoking What can be
the reason? I'm afraid the house-agent
took us in. lie said Lord Portcullis
lived very near
Eyes, know he did. Perhaps I've
overlooked him. Let me have another
try" and Mrs. Bassett, with hopeful
look in her eyes, produces the china
card-receiver from her lap beneath the
table-cloth, and spreads the contents
out, one by one, on the table in front of
of her, pushing aside her plate to make
room. mo, ] was right There's no
name of the sort. AS | say" and she
gathers up the cards and throws them
disdainfully back into the receiver,
there is not single title among
them"
THE Earl of Portcullis," says Dora,
meditatively; 81 wonder i wonder"
"Well. what do you wonderP" asks
her mother, with some misgivings as to
the drift of her daughters cogitations;
"if he's myth2"
MY, nor exclaims Dora; II know
better than that. Our groom knows
one of his lordship's grooms very we'll.
Only II Lord Entitled knows him"
Mr.. Bassett looks up quickly from his
paper; -, -, r..o..,s
asks.
81 only said ! wondered IL he knew
Lord Portcullis."
who's Lord Portcullis?"
"How tiresome you are, papa!
He's Lord Portcullis-or the Earl Of
Portcullis, II you like IL better. That's
all know about him, except that he
| lives at Grassland Park"
'Oh, yes TO be sure. That's the man.
] forgot his name. Bye-the-byc, ] saw
him out driving to-day. That is to say,
he drove out of the park gates as ! was
passing in my four-in-hand coach. A
tall, handsome, distingue-looking man,
and he had mighty pretty daughter
at least, presume she was"
What? Pretty OF his daughter?'
queries Hi.
Both" answers Mr.. Bassett, with an
annihilating nod at his son; anything
further to offer?" Iii has no., and his
father goes on. IL guess" he begins,
with one of those lapses back to his nat
ural individuality, not uncommon with
the average Anglomaniac.
"What?'' cry Mrs. Bassett and Dora
in breath.
"Eh?" says Mr.. Bassctt; what? OH
Well, fanny It was the earl. lie
looked like on Englishman, anyhow"