Mohave County miner. [volume] (Mineral Park, A.T. [Ariz.]) 1882-1918, 1890-09-27
WIT AND HUMOR.

ttcay1fiA
Seaside flrtatIcrs do not last because
they are huildsd ON the sand. - Soper'
vile Journal
Chorus Of Coquettes LET Us each
be up and doing with q fate Tor any
heart. ~ Washington I'aF.
The only popular adviser Is the one
who gives counsel that hts our IN
ciinations. Miloankee Journal.
Life h Ike game Of whist--its
mystesiss viii be solved when the last
trump is played. Eimirs Gasette.
He who goes into the world with CEN
sure on his lips will pass through life a
friendless man. Atehfs0'g 0Ioott
There Is, generally speaking. moth
Ing green about widow, notwithstand-
Ing Der weeds. Boston Transcript.
There Is more real heartache in q
square yard Of suspense than in an
acre Of realization.-0reat Harrington
Rews.
The oyster will remain at the sea
shore all summers but The clam viii
be most In soeiety.--Nev Orleans
PieayHns.
There may be sermons In stones. !"
but don't imagine, friend that there
are rocks In religion. Harvard
Lampoon.
Minister-"Ars you in the church.
missP Miss Highsee--'.No, siri I'm
ouIy a member Of the choir, sir. p
KoHkeYs Statesman.
II you want clear skin" all that 10
necessary 10 to buy goods Of street
peddler or sign paper without read
Ing it.---Bgsh1seH Record.
she-"Wbat a strong face he has"
He--"Yes; that comes from exercise
He has been travelling on II for many
years. 7eyre Haute EzprcsS.
rs your husband In, MADAME mo.
be was just here minute rgo arguing
with me. You'll find yhim probably
down at the doctors. "-Epoch
Interviewer--.you began life az .
clerk, did you notg' Merehant--''No,
sir; began life as king. was the
first baby. Terre Haate Express.
1--we got 8 good dog Id like to sell
you" said fancier 10 Yangle. met
muckr' replied Fangle; ''why. I've got
four marriageable daughters" --Epoch.
'.will you think of me very often
while YOU are away, dearest john"
But, Emily, you know that this is to
be a pleasure trip. "--Fifegeade Halter.
Smythe-"Youl look unhappy. What's
the rnatter?n Roberts--"I have bad .
row with my uncle" Snythe--'Did
you lose the tickets"-TsEdS sifttngs.
"How Is she your sister? by mar
riageP" "N-no," stammered Chappie.
Quite the reverse. you know. B-by
re-refuoal of m-m-marriege. IN T.
Sun.
Yabsley--'.How Timrnins has inn
proved since his marriage wick
wire-"I suppose he geta rid Of all his
cussedness at home now. 1srre HaEtt
Express
Children not addicted 10 fun, bolster
guinness. and mischief may grow up 10
lie respectable members Of society.
but as children they are failures. =
Boston Budget.
Jenks-''Winks married q woman OF
intellect, didn't hep" Blinks-'G don't
know. Whya" Jinks--'I notice he
never has any buttons on bis clothes"
~ y. Weekly.
Want some Of my hair restorer.
sir?" asked the barber; best In the
world" 20, I've something better
I've just 20, divorce from my wife. :"
Philadelphia Tunes.
Il understand that Cntely. whom
they wanted 70 arrest Tor erabezzle-
ment has skipped TO Europe Yes.
be has gone beyond the seizeT
- Laurence american.
Faker-s'Neckties suspenders--"
Baboony lhaughtily)--''Dc / look like
man who'd wear 20-cent necktieP'
Iaker---"Vell. half some for 10 cents,
nister."-TeSas Sytings.
HDo you know why that How ut the
opposite table keeps his paper all the
time so before his facet" why, Of
course. The man at this table Is his
tailor. "--Fliege,sde Biatt<r.
Biggs- hair falling ont. old nanP"
Baggs Biggs--''What does
that BALI spot means" Haggs--"Well.
there was little falling out up at the
house last night come TO think. "
Detroit Free Press.
Some one says that 'fhe happiest.
looking man Is the ono who Is not
brdened with wealth. He evidently
did not form his opinion from seeing .
friend returning from the races
Yonker'S Statesman.
Did your husband leave a willP''
asked the lawyer Of the weeping
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES. 81 don't
think he could. l know he never had
any as long as I've been married to
him. y" Philadelphia Times.
A philosophical and calculating man
rises TO remark what singular thing
II Is that the simple utterance OF the
word Yes" at the altar gives woman
the right to No" so much after mar
riage. Philadelphia Ledger.
Anxious Mother-"D on'4 you know
that George Washington never, never
told lie?" Sinful Boy~-"Maybe bis
mamma didn't care how much cakes
and jam he took. and he wasn't 'fraid
to tell her."-N Y. Weekly.
Dude (facetiously)--'T've been try
ing the mind-cure for my rheumatism. !"
Young Lady (grayely The mind
curep Why, you ought to have tried
that long ago. There is nothing you
need SO much. "--Boston Courier.
Now pray for Susie Bates" said
Mrs. Slmeral To 6-Ynnr-nld Elnasin whn