The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1890-08-31
"REMINISCENCES.
AUTHORIZATIONS, REALITY AND
MEMORIES OF AN
OUTING.
A Summers Chase for "the Phantom
With the Reckoning Hand, That
Still Allures and Stal
Eludes."
To the Editor of the Eagle

To the Editor of the Eagle
When the erudite boy of the Nineteenth
century defined phlebotony as noun, the
bottom of a flea," he had about as correct
a conception of Webster as MANY of us
have of the definition of pleasure-to please,
to please whom, yourself or somebody else2
About sixty people from Wichita went
down TO Boston for pleasure. Some OF the
sixty laid awake o. nights, previous to de-
parture, too full of bright anticipations OF
pleasure for the drowsy God to get IN his
work. One can not have his cake and eat
it, and it has always seemed to me that
pleasures could not be enjoyed both in an
ticipation and reality Somewhere disap-
pointment was sure to enter the scene.
The party of fifty from Wichita and
twenty-eight from Winfield on embark
ing from the ocean steamer In the
harbor of Boston instantly disin-
tegrated and what became of
the major portion of them Is beyond
nv knowledge l have no doubt that If
each one was willing TO relate his or her
experience there would be such comedy
of errors depicted as would lay the one at
tributed to the immortal Shakespeare In
the cool shadows.
There was a party that went down TO
Nantasket Beach TO enjoy TO repletlon the
pleasures of a clam feast. In anticipation
each savory clam was rolled beneath the
tongue as a sweet morsel-thus being
made to do duty twice. The imaginary
clam was all right The real clam had his
post-mortem revenge, evidenced by the
victims oft repeated groan that he was
sicker-n-a-dog. There was a party that
went down to Plymouth to clam bake.
IN L. g. hn frQa fr1ln
there in bright anticipation were the
clans waiting to be devoured at the other
end of the road, and so this party paid
81 piece for a ticket and were
whirled away through as measly section
of country as disgraces the old Bay state.
Unless claims were unusually plenty al
Plymouth in that day there could not be
piece for each individual present, so crazy
was everybody for novelty that was TO
cost nothing. / have quite vivid recol-
lection of seeing a certain party change
front to rear in disgust and make tracks IN
the direction of the depot. Methinks |
can see them now, male and female, ana
the small boy too mot small fry" as the
type made me say in former letter. help
ing themselves at booth hard by, TO
Frankfort sandwiches to appease an ap-
petite cultivated exclusively for CLANS.
Here was another anticipated pleasure
gone oIimmering Then this party on ar
irving in Boston and thinking they
knew every street and alley In the
CITY by this time, lost their
way and eventually on the advice OF po-
| liceman took a car which circumnavigated
a portion of the globe and eventually set
/ them down further from home than when
! they started However, full compensation
was rendered when the Quincy house res
| taurant was reached and quilted only
when the cook threw up-hls Job In dis
| gust
There was party that went from Boston
| to New York and remained over night at
| the Stanevix Hall hotel in Albany intend
! ing to take the steamer on the Hudson the
| next morning | mention the name of the
| hotel because would like to get even with
the landlord for his exhorbitant charges,
| and the breakfast which travelling man
| would characterize as rocky" which we
were forced to leave severely alone. Our
stomachs were not in condition TO "abide
the result" There was a gentleman and
| lady not of our party, who made
a vigorous kick The gentleman, as he
called the attention of the head waiter to a
mutton chop which looked as If dog had
been tusseling with it, said he was paying
81 day and he wanted one mouthIul tha'
| was fit to eat The head waiter called the
landlord. who took the platter in his hand
shifted at the disgruntled chop, and ther
| mournfuliy, without word. but with q
sad expression of countenance took up his
line of march for the kitchen. He was toe
mild a hammered man to lead one to hope
| that the fiend who presided at the range
now Law in a CHASTITY heap in the bach
| ward But the ire of the man with the
mutton chop grievance was excited anC
like Banquos ghost it wouldn't down
worth a cent The colOred waiter at
tempted to defend the reputation of The
cuisine and unfortunately gave utter
auce to remark which this hot
spur construed as an insult to him
As quick as lightning he sprang from M
seat, put himself in the attitude of a mar
who means business, and right then anC
there expected to see the gore OF n de
fenceless waiter discOlor the table cloth.
was glad there was no shooting and | 90
out of that After paying my bill ha'
the satisfaction of telling the landlord u
his teeth that had breakfasted In thirty
four states of this union, but the one TO
which had just paid him dollar was
disgrace to a cent lunch counter. No
was this all. his very efficient clerk hat
charged several members of the party 70
baths. which they had neither ordered no
taken the pressure brought TO bear force'
a disagreement. AT COney Island part
stopped at the West End hotel for Dime
to be served as is their custom on tn
veranda. We only had thlrt
minutes in which 10 be served be
: fore the departure OF our boa
II seemed as If they never would get tn
table arranged. Finally the party wa
seated at two tables placed side by. SIDE
busily engaged jotting down on piece Q
paper their various orders. There appear
ed to be no waiter at hand TO receive then
| and. growing impatient, l raped on tn
table. which had the effect OF bringing a
idle waiter from another table. In toiel
ably fair German he informed US that Nc
| Is would take the order pretty soon afte
, a little while yet" As our time was no1
1 about up, we told him to give our compl
, ments to No II and tell him we would sc
him later. Then we vanished. / think
/ live TO be quite old and tough / Will I
= able TO look back TO Coney Island and b
r hold again in memory the look of blaa
| dismaY in the face of No u as he rushe
[ 10 the railing of the veranda and shadln
! his eyes with bis hand conten
: plated the loss Of four dollars and seYent.
five cents.
I have before nv minds eye party thS
went down 10 the Brooklyn bridge TO tab
| notes. so that when the new Douglas ay
=. | nue. bridge across Chisholm creek mate
ializes they may be able TO put the know
: edge gained TO some practical use. -
: the return, foot-sore and weary. as tired ;
{ though following the plough for Gay,
? certain member of this party hailed
crowded car and the first vacant seat Ofe
ing. sank so gently, All, so gently, into
that the glass in the window at his elbO
popped out simultaneous herewith, an
as il broke in a thousand pieces on Il
\ granite pavement sounded as loud
u some ears a. fire gong. The car vi
o stopped and am told that the scene tn
c ensued between the conductor and u
e Wichita pilgrim was OF that rich rars ra'
2 variety Astounding only IN certain loca
ties I WAS very much elateG when !
: formed that in the wordy scrap that ensu'
the member Of my party acquitted himse
' with credit and convinced the policema
< vrho arr,ea-a,1 On the scene g. an arbit