Telegram-herald., 1890-11-11

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Successful LArysr Aers. Il = SD taAE
six Ea0nghs sftsx hAs senatorial terra h44
sxpissa fear blg b1nAls,s Of listers were
fgaAd IA his dosk. adirassed - s-snaseF
CoIgsr, from whlch the red tsps pat "a
shska - Eas pages IA tie ssEla.Is chaz1-
Der aad asg~r b<~G removed
Thsre l. = senator ~hozn some 4 tho
fellows who have boen Iookiag fOr lobs
and hnding thsm lot win extend bat
ss2nt welcome - Ca hls return This
0ld geuEieEaaa evidently believes tae
Erst duty Il ssEtesnlza = q attend 70
ths wants II Lis own family immediate
and remote. At any rate. L Is said n
has seven nsmbsrs II his family On the
pay I'll u tas senate. aa1 beS4des keeps
his private coach team IA the senatorial
stables.
Tie hAbitoss Of poor, forseken Wash
ingtoa wil bs glad 10 see SENATOR VOL
c0tt, even II the goat stil hAs hin IA It's
gzip. senator Woloott's goat was ono
Of tie Jokes Of the last session II is
sad that not for twenty years had
clear. unmlst zkRble. robust case Of gout
been seen IN the senate Of the United
States. aud 1T last came along this
breezy person from the west, the young
est man In the senate, and carried of
the honors- With a score or more Of
old chaps industriOusly dining out four
OF five tunes a week. and dining in two
or three times week. ia tho most ap-
proved gout producing sunptuousness.
all their efforts came 70 naught and the
I prize was eaptgTed by boy
( Even Senator Morgan. who costs the
/ United States government s., 900 year
7 for his salary and perquisites, and 81, 900
o year for printing his speeches in The
Congressional Record, viii be forgiven
So win Mr.. Springer. Of Illinois, who
I does not make long speeches, bat great
I many Of them The Ginoisan Is one of
the ablest members Of tho house, bat his
activity Is 50 phenomenal that his col
/ leagues call him bob Up Bill Springer. T"
Two or three years ago Capt John r.
/ Thomas, then q congressman from nh-
nois, lay seriously i'll at his rooms in the
Ebbitt House. His case was SO critical
that a consultation OF physicians was
held, and while this was going on at his
bedside ono of the physicians made =
somewhat lengthy and proeaic statement
Of his views. The patient was supposed
TO be unconscious, bat as the doctor con
cluded Capt. Thomas opened his eyes
and Iauttered;
Whose speech WAS thstY
Tho doctors looked at one another, and
finally one said: He thinks he is in the
house. Humor him and tell him il was
Mr.. Springer's speech" This was done,
whereupon Thomas brought the sem
blance of smile to bis lips and retorted:
II am very, very sick, but If / can
stand one of Springer's speeches l can
stand anything. viii get we'll"
And get wei he did. That said
one OF the physicians, twas Jest made
almost in the grave, the ruling passion
strong IN death, for Capt Thomas was
then so low that mono OF Us expected
him 10 recover. Though we laughed at
his joke not one Of Us would have been
surprised 10 see him die as we laughed.
Thomas and Springer have often laughed
over the incident, and Springer claims
that be and not the doctors saved the
captains lie"
Washington is 80 duh a place that
even Mr. Springer's speeches would now
draw large audiences. We could gather
an enormous crowd here 10 go out in a
vacant lot and see Joe Cannon make a
speech with his arms Life here is 50
eolorless that if Washington restaurant
keeper could hire Senator Hosr 10 come
here and eat his usual midday luncheon
OF crackers and milk that restaurant
keepers fortuns would be made Or, il
he couldn't get Hoar. Senator Blair. as
the great senatorial pie bitter, would dc
quite as well WALTER WEIAAK.