davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Los Angeles daily herald., 1890-01-20

~S~~~S~s
In Hades, while eternity holds out;
May he forever look through all the papers
In search of something new to write about
May brindled asps and dreary salamandeTs
Writhe round him thick as ears upon sheaf
May he have earache, leprosy and glanders,
Who steals fallen nations slice of beef.
May his lone feet DER many North Pole hum.
mock
OF glaring ice, plod without hope of rest,
While toOthless furies dance upon his stomach
And redhot ibis beaks dissect his breast
On earth may every hangman call him brother
And down below-the foul, inhuman thief
Be cooped forever with his first wite's mother
Who takes the Indian heathen's bit OF beef.
Beyond Albuquerque the desert begins
in real earnest the great emptiness
which extends on the south far across the
Mexican border and in the west stretches
out it's inhospitable space even into Cali
fornia-and in this region the tramp falls
upon evil days. Some half dozen dreary
slumbrous little towns are dotted down
150 miles apart, few laborers' butts anc
a section house, wherein resides an
Extensively naughty railroad ofticia
clad in little brief authority, appear
about once in fifteen miles, and the rest
is sky and dust and an eternal vista o.
two steel rails straddling monotonously
from one horizon to the other.
THE DESERT.
In this locality the traveller must dis
pense with scruples of all sorts as to how
his dinner is procured-if he procuret
one at all he has cause for thankfulness
For my own part, my last qualm OF con
science departed at Deming. A bowel.
less inscription on board told me that
San Francisco was still l, POP miles away
and filled with this depressing informa'
tion banged at the door Of section
house Q few miles along the line, with
the intention Of demanding something tc
Los Angeles daily herald., 1890-01-20

Sohmer pianos and Estey organs
Liberal terms and prices at @. E. Day's
music store, 8 N. Spring street.
Los Angeles daily herald., 1890-01-20

ness, Impotency and Lost Manhood permanent,
ly cured. The siok and afflicted should not fatl
to call upon him. The Doctor has Travelled ex-
tensively In Europe and inspected thoroughly
the various hospitals there, obtaining greae
deal of valuable inform alton, which ne ID com
petent to impart to those In need ofhis services
The Doctor cures where others fail. Try him.
DIR. GIBBON will make no CAaygG nnlell he
effects cure. Persons at . distance CURED AT
HOME. All communications strictly conhden-
tisl. AL letters answered in plain envelopes
Send ten dollars for package Of medicine
Call or write. Address DIR. J.F. GIBBON, Boz
1857, San Franofsoo, Oal.
Mention Los Angeles HRhALD. O7-1Zm
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21
Count waIdersee's Predicament.
Cor. New York Tribune.

Cor. New York Tribune
There is story going about in Berlin
which reminds one of the Archbishop
Of Granada and Gil Bias. Emperor
William, Some weeks ago, sent in an
anonymous essay to the annual compe-
tition of the general staff, which Count
Waldersee not only criticised but ridi-
culed. The Emperor, who was present,
became SO excited that Gen. Won Caprivi,
who was listening, began to suspect that
His Majesty must be the author, and he
at once proceeded to support the ideas
of the writer, which he eulogized, de-
scribing the essay as in every way ad-
mirable. The Emperor then dis
closed his secret, and begged Count
Waldersee to tell him candidly
whether Gen. Won Caprivi had con-
vinced him that His Majesty's views
were correct, the result being that the
count repeated his former observations,
but in milder terms, and then the En-
peror could not conceal his anger, the
result being that the count went to Italy
for holiday. and, probably, it was Gen.
Won Cnprivi's intelligent appreciation of
His Maiesty's essay which first recon-
mended him for the post Of Chancellor
The authors of the best three essays in
this competition make their names
known after the award has been given,
and the Emperor would have been de-
lighted, and with reason, if he had won
the prize anonymously, 80 that he was
much 1rritated and mortified to find his
paper put aside with scorn and derision.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21
ers and Founders. and lust enough to

ers and Founders, and just enough to
fill my creel to the bursting point.
I looked at them carefully to see that
they were not branded with the name
of anybody. and when found that
they were not l turned my back upon
the trough and fell into an distracted
mood, wondering how l could catch
them. Insensibly to myself, of course,
my line with baited hook attached fell
into the fountain. Suddenly felt q
terrific Juggling and wrenching sif some
one was trying to take my pole away
from me. I seized it valiantly, and the
next knew fine fat trout lay gasping
and somer saulting on the highway. [
looked around to see that no one was
looking, and hastily transferred the
beauty to my basket, and in a moment
or two I was off in another fit OF alb
straction with my back to the fountain.
That night / had the boarders green
with envy. [ did hear that the land
lord of certain wayside inn INDUCED
in terrific swearing bee next morning,
and said something about city thieves
and blackguards.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21
Great Light at Sea.

The search light hitherto used on
American warships is very heavy ap-
paratus, made in France, weighing
about LOCO pounds, and costing about
$4,000. The new search light weighs
only about 100 pounds, is of about 1000
candle power, and costs $3.50. One man
can easily handle it, and the light is con-
centrated in parallel rays, instead of be-
ing diffused over wide area, as in those
previously used. At the distance of
half a mile. on clear nights, huoys can
be plainly seen, and every rope in the
rigging Of ship. It is claimed that the
light will penetrate the thickest fog suf-
ficiently to prevent collisions. An in
teresting 4perimaAe was made by
turning the beam vertically, when col
umn of light three-quarters of a mile
high was produced. visible on dark,
clear nights many miles away. and said
to be visible in the thickest fog at the
distance of one eighth of q mile.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21
she frtOored Him

From the New York Herald.
There is rush and scramble on the
Brooklyn bridge. 1t is the Brooklyn
workaday crowd going to New York.
The seats are quickly filled, and in a
breath almost there is big crowd of
''standees."
A "dudeful" clerk, with q most lam
gushing air, arises and gushingly prof
fers his seat to a pretty girl of the genus
I. W., otherwise known to fame as the
independent typewritist.
The maid is very pretty, and lnstinc-
lively you look to see and share in the
smile which she is sure to cast on the
charming .'clerklet." Instead, to your
establishment, there is look of wither-
ing scorn.
Don't trouble yourself, pray" she
says, and there are barDs and sharp
points in her speech.
.,s.Aw, no trouble, | assuah you,' SAYS
the "clerklet." pray sit down and aw
blige me-"
The independent t. W. straightens up,
and look OF ineffable scorn mantles her
face.
s'See here, young man." she says, and
she says it with the plainness of the
business manager when he tells you
that there is not the iaintest shadow of
chance of raise of salary, "you may
keep your seat. [ don't want 1t. You
permitted me to stand all the way from
East New York on the crookedest road
in Brooklyn, and do not propose for a
seven minutes ride. to give you the
privilege of staring in my face and tax
ing whatever other liberties may enter
into yonr feeble intellect"
She said this in low tone, but one
SO keen of concentrated edge that it
permeated the entire car. Then she
turned her back on him. The remain
der of the audience smiled audibly, and
the act was ended.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21
The BOwery and Its Story.

From Frank Leslies Popular Monthly.
The Bowery Is mile OF history. No
other street tells so much of the story of
the republic and its metropolis. A trail
of the warlike Wickquaskeeks when
yet the primeval forest overshadowed
the Island of Manhattan, and the In
dian village occupied the future site of
Chatham Square; a bridle-path to the
homestead of the last and greatest of the
SAINT, whose Bowery gave its name to the
roadway which his English successors
widened and improved; country post
road through which ratified the stages
to Boston and Albany, and down which
the Quaker merchant Murray numbered
in his ''leathern conveniency" from the
heights of Nuremberg, now Murray
Hill, and the wife of Frederick Phil
lipse, the Yonkers Patrocn, drove her
four black ponies at break
neck speed; a broad avenue
that echoed proudly to the tread
of the American battalions that
marched in with Washington on that
November day which saw the last Brit
ish soldier embarking at the Battery;
a street bordered with stately poplars
and lined with pretty rural homes in
the early years of this century; a street
in it's transition state famous for its fire.
men and it's fights, for it's theaters. and
its bellies, for it's patriotism and its
pugilism, for it's American types of
character and it's development of for
eign methods, the Bowery is now a
great historic thoroughfare, which all
nations of the earth have combined to
make the moet cosmopolitan of all
streets in the new world. From first
to last it has had the strange distinction
of never having seen a church erected
upon it's building-line, and yet it has
always been typical OF city life. and the
story of New York would be shorn of
much of it's glory if no mention were
made of the mile of street which
stretches between Chatham Square and
the Cooper Union.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21
A SUMMER SONG.
nv rANxN roRREsrEI-


Oh, lovely sunbeams through the meadows
On golden pinions, all the livelong day,
Kissing young leaves, on crystal streamlets
Changing to living gold their slvery spray!
Wee amorous elves, coquetting with the roses,
Wooing the daisy in her grassy bed,
Till the shy flower uncOnSc1Ousiy unClOSeS
Her dew gemmed leaves. and bushes rosy
red
Bidding the flowers in sheltered hooks awake,
Calling young song birds from their happy
Waking the laughter of the dimpling lake!
Playing "Bo- peep amid the white buds blow
In nearly clusters on the hawthorn tree
To the round eyes of wondering childhood
showing
1.-THE rapid journeyings of the wandering bee.
Shedding a halo bright on youthful tressess,
Bidding young hearts for very rapture sing,
Touching the brow of care with KIND caresses,
Or glinting lightly on the Skylark'S wing
All, merry sunbeams, like sly cupids straylng
In the glad footsteps of the rustic lass,
On sun-tanned cheeks and snow-whlte kerr
TwinkIing like fiireflies in the emerald grass
Oh, lovely sunbeams, like blest angels gliding,
Through courts of squalor, sickness want and
Telling of clouds like golden chariots riding
Proudly, majestic DER world of bloom;
Of winding lanes, and milkwhite homesteads
peeping
Like modest virgins from secluded bowers;
Or shallow pools, and baby streamlets leap1ng
In giddy gladness meath housekeeping flow
ers.
Dance, lovely sunbeams through fair country
meadows.
Battle hill and cottage in your holy light
From city slums go chase the mournful shad-
That fill poor homesteads with eternal night
To those who pine i'll ignorance and sorrow
May all your tenderest, hottest gifts be given,
That sorroWing hearts one ray of hope may Dor
row
In the sweet knowledge that ye come from
Heaven!
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21
Examples of Good Breeding.

From the Youths Companion.
An accurate remembrance of names
and faces has been called a gift of
princes. Another gift, showing the no.
bility of both heart and breeding, is that
of punctilious courtesy toward the hum
BILE as well as the great.
why" said rich and vulgar woman,
who was walking with a relative who
could claim better breeding, " is it pos
sible you bow to your cook ?"
81 hope / shall always be found
worthy" was the quiet reply; ''my cook
is very good woman"
"Ah but I'd 60 out Of me way and
back ag'ln to mate wild him." said an
old Irish woman, enthusiastically, In
speaking of the rich man of her town;
hes the only .gintleman that takes off
his hat to me-"
A young Englishman staying at Fon-
tainebleau in the time Of Napoleon Ill.
CHANGED to fall in with royal party
while hunting in the forest, and made a
pleasant impression upon the Emperor,
who invited MIN to dinner. The young
man longed to accept so signal an hon.
or, but he had previously made an en-
gagement to be with some old ladies' at
Geneva on the appointed day. Doubtless
they would have gladly released him
from his engagement under the plea of
dining with an Emperor, but he did not
ask that grace. The Emperor received
his excuse, and the old ladies his pres
ence.
A modest but exceedingly punctilious
gentleman, an English clergy man, one
afternoon took tea with the poet Tenny-
son, who, as his guest was about to leave,
invited him to take a walk. Much as
he desired further conversation with
his host he was obliged to excuse him
self, and hasten away to meet one of
his hum blest parishioners.
Il should have been greatly pleased
to 60 with him." be said afterward,
but, you see, | had promised old
Thompson to take walk with him, and
of course he came first"
"Why should you thank a servant ?"
asked father who was fond of the So
cratic method Of teaching, and loved to
question his little son until the lad
reached wise conclusions by his own
wit. "They are paid for what they do.
Do you owe them anything but money"
Isl owe them money!" said the lad,
somewhat perplexed in expressing
what he really felt, land thank them
because-because 1 owe it to myself to
be polite"
He had learned the meaning of the
old, grand motto, ''Noblesse oblige."
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21
Two Copper Cents.
From Chatter.


We were minted the same day in 1886.
One of us bought paper almost as DON
as we left the mint. The other went
into young fellows pocket. 'tor luck, I"
he said. The young fellow was on his
way to Europe. The cent that bought
the paper bought cents worth of milk
for the newsboy's mother. Then the
grocer paid it out to an expressman with
some silver. 1t got in with its betters
and was uncomfortable until it got in
a bar-room till" After that it led to
lowly liSe. For years the owner of the
bar-room kept it on the table when he
played cards with his customers. He
said it was his ''lucky penny"
One night late middle-aged man
came in begging. Without thinking, its
owner for fifteen years tossed it to the
beggar with an oath. That was all he
got there. The cent went into his
pocket. He was poor. From that time
credit for his good luck. Though un-
fortunate itself, it had always brought
luck to others. 1t never lett it's last
owner. 1t saw him grow from poor to
rich man, and from middle-aged to
an old miser. The more he got the
more he wanted. There was nothing
short of murder he would not do for
money. He robbed his best friends,
and they never knew it. He passed for
q good man. He was the greatest and
the most magnificent hypocrite that
lived. This is what he used to whisper
to his smooth, shining, and lucky pen
ny.
Well, the other penny stuck to the
young fellow, on his way through Eu-
rope. When he came back, after hap
by years of wandering, he had velvet
case made for the lucky cent. The first
day it left his pocket for the case he was
killed in a runaway. His things went
to this one and that, and the cent was
shot at in shooting-galery for a num-
Der OF years. No bullet ever struck it.
Everybody knew that and rybody
wanted it. So it was finally sold
tor So and lost by the gambler who
bought it, and, found by the miser, and
it went into the latter's pocket, and
found it's twin alter ffty-tive years.
Two nights ago the miser choked to
death on piece of hard bread. They
came and placed him in coffin. They
conld not close his horrible eyes until
until they thought Of two copper cents.
So, here we are, in our coffin, divided
by nose, holding down the lids Of a
dead mans eyes.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21
Supppme1y DELIGHTFUL

To the emaciated and debilftated invalid is the
sense of returning health and strength produced
by Hostetter's Stomach Bitters. When that pro-
moter of vigor is tested by persons in feeble
health, its restorative and vitalzing potency
soon evinces itself in improved appetite, diges-
ton and nightly repose the sole conditions un-
der which strength and nerve quietude is vouch-
safed to the human system. A gain in flesh of
course ensucs upon the restoration of digestion
and assimilation. AS surely winter follows
the fall of the leaf does disease shadow the foot
steps of declining strength, when the premature
decadence of vitality is not arrested. Marasmus.
consumption and other wasting maladies arc
prompt to tasten upon the enfeebled. Avert dis
ease, therefore, with this grand enabling tonic,
which not only renews failing strength, but
mitigates and counteracts the infirmities of age
and those of the gentler sex. Rheumatism, ma
laria, liver and kidney trout les yield to it.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21
A Quaint Old Parsons Prank.
From the lewiston journal.

FTO1n IlG lev ISIOH JOUTIdI
A very eccentric old bachelor was
Father Fletcher, one of the old Metho-
dist ministers, and his shyness of wo-
mankind amounted to antipathy. One
day as,he was riding along a country road
one of his lady Pensioners, who was
walking the same way, politely asked
for a ride. Certainly, madam" polite
ly replied the pastor, and he immedi-
ately alighted, as the lady supposed, to
assist her to enter the carriage. She
stepped quickly in. whereupon he
handed her the reins and said, ''Drive
on, madam, and when you arrive at
your destination please hitch the horse,
and I will soon be along"
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21
A Woman Two Hundred Years Old.

A case is ON record of woman who
lived to this advanced age, but 1t is scarce
ly necessary TO state that it was in ''the
olden time" Nowadays too many wom-
en- do not live half their allotted years.
The mortality due to funtionai derange-
ments in the weaker sex is simply fright
full, to say nothing of the indiscribable Suf-
Se v mach n m so we R Mofn
these sufferers there is a certain relief. DR..
Pierces Favorte Prescription will posi-
lively cure lucorrnea, painful menstrual
ton, prolapsus, pain in the ovaries, weak
back; in short, all those complaints to
which SO many women are martyrs. 1t is
the only guaranteed cure, see guarantee
on bottle wrapper.
CLEANSE the liver stomach, bowels and
whole system by using DR.. Pierce'S Pei
let's
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21
An Innocent FISHERMAN.
EroYo tho NoxU VorE Horo1d

From the New YORK Herald.
/ had been fishing all day with indif-
ferent success, had taken numerous
tumbles, and was wet from the soles of
my Ieet to the nape Of my neck; my
flask was empty and my FISH basket 30
nearly so that it was no fun at all to re-
turn to the hotel and suffer the sings
and arrows Of my fellow boarders. In
the dusk of the evening halted by a
ways,de tavern, with large drinking
fountain in front, and happening TO look
into 1t saw several fine lat, speckled
trout-beauties they were-half pound
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21
A Gard of Thanks.

If the proprietor of Kemps Balsam
should publish a card of thanks. containing
expressions ofgratitude which come TO him
daily from those who have been cured of
severe throat and lung troubles by the use
Of Kemp's Balsam, it would fill fair-sized
book. How much better to invite all to
call on any druggist and get free sample
bottle that you may test for yourself its
power. Large bottles SOC and 81.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21
A Poetr idea Spoiled.

From th~Detroit Free Press.
famous astronomer denies that stars
twinkle, and declares that the poet who
wrote Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star"
was of his base. The stars stand up
there like hard bricks in wall. and all
the twinkling is done by your eye. It
is one of those optical decisions which
don't cost a cent, and are always on hand
when wanted
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21

LoNGFELLow's house in Cam bridge is
now occupied by his eldest daughter
and her uncle. Rev. Samuel Longfellow.
The house is kept unchanged. Miss
Longfeilow's sisters, Mrs. K. III. Dana
and Mrs. Thorpe, have built houses ad-
joining the old estate.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21

CHARLES GIBSON, of St. Louis, has the
highest homer ever conferred upon an
American citizen by Germany. It is
that of the frst-class decoration of the
Royal Order Of the Crown. Mr.. Glib
son has represented the German
Crown in legal way for several years.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21
Your Blood

Needs good cleansing this spring, in order to
overcome the impurities which have accumula-
ted during the winter, or which may be heredi-
tary, and cause you much suffering. We conf
IDENTIFY recommend Hoods Sarsa parilla the
very best spring medicine. BY its use the blood
is purified enriched and vitalized; that tired
feeling is entirely overcome, and the whole body
given strength and vigor The appetite is re-
stored and sharpened, the digestive organs are
toned, and the kidneys and liver invigorated.
II was feeling very much worn out and found
nothing to benefit me till took Hoods Sarsapa-
rilla. l have now taken several bottles, and it
has made me feel perfectly well. l was also
troubled with sores breaking out in my mouth.
but since taking Hoods Sarsaparilla have had no
further trouble from tn em. l have recommend
ed it to others, who have been very much bene-
flied by using it." Mrs. MARY ADDERLY, 627
North Water Street, Decatur, III.
Hoods SarsapariIIa
Sold by all druggists ST. six for So. Prepared only
by C.. T. HOOD Il CO., Lowell, Mass
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21

Slr Noveis Free, will be sent by Cragin &
Co., Philada., Pa, to any one in the U. s. or
Canada, postage paid, upon receipt of 25
Dobbins' Electric Soap wrappers. See list
of novels on circulars around each bar.
SOAP for sale by all grOcers
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21

WILLIAM WALDORF AsToR has recently
been selling some real estate in New
York City. This is 80 contrary to prece-
dent in the Aston family that people are
talking about it.. az.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21

M. PEDRoUs, physician at Nantes,
France, has the strange GIFT of being
able to see the color of sounds. He
says that human voices are red, blue,
black. tan, slate and all other colors,
and that the color of some very hand
some women's voices is like butter
milk.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21

IF afflicted with Sore Eyes, use DIR
Isaac Thompson's Eye Water. Druggists
sell it. 25 cents.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21

CONGRESSMAN MCADoo has accepted
the invitation of the veterans and citi-
zens of Brooklyn to deliver the Grafton
at Greenwood Cemetery on Memorial
Day.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21

NJ. L. THOMPSON & CO.. Druggists, Couders-
port, Pa. say Halls Catarrh Cure is the best
and only sure cure for catarrh they ever SOLD
Druggists sell it, 75c >.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1890-05-21

BRONCHITIS is cured by frequent small
doses of Piso's Cure for Consumption.