The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1890-05-14
A CASE OF SPOONS.
An Appropriate Wedding Gift. to
Which the Brides Did not Take.

II ulGu thQ OllAVO IN "
The amount of shopping for we'd
ding gifts that is going on is m
thing tremendous, and the man who
at the club the other day remarked
that he had concluded to be married,
SO that he could shift to the shoulders
of his wife the responsibility
of making dinner calls and
of buying wedding gifts raj
answered by a groan Of SYM
| pathy from all the bachelors present.
| And the mention of wedding gifts re-
calls one Of the bits OF light but sonie-
what amusing gossip floating here.
S'The tale tells as William Morris
says in beginning his new volume,
that in tines not s'long past" there
was a wealthy and artistic bachelor
in Boston who semitic an acquaintance
as a wedding gift a set of berry spoons
of a fashion peculiar and unique.
They pleased him much, but they did
not please the bride at all, and she,
therefore, quietly took them back to
the house where they were bought
and exchanged them. In the course
| of the winter the gentleman went to
the same jeweller to procure a wedding
| gift for another friend, saw and recog-
nized the spoons, bought them and
| presented them, still unmarked, to the
second bride. She liked them no
better than did her friend, and, like
her friend, she took them back to the
silversmith. But in the fullness of
time the original donor of the spoons
took unto himself a wife. and then
one of his friends who had not heard
of the first purchase, went to the
jeweller and said to him
You know what Mr.. J. would like.
Tell me what to give him as a we'd
ding present.
Il think answered the jeweller
with a smile, that he mus like these
spoons pretty well, for he has bought
them twice.
Then he shall have them,n was the
reply, but / really think it will be
well to have them marked this time,
so that they shall not come back
again.
And so it came about that the
unique and most artistically ugly
spoons came into the possession of
Mr.. j., who declares that they are the
handsomest berry spoons that he v %
saw.-ChicGgo Tribune.
Physical Culture Cranks.
The other day | accidentally a
across o member of the new school of
physical culture women, whom / take
to be the same women who recently
made a man rich by letting him pre-
scribe hot water by the quart three
times a day as the great catholicon
and beautifier.
list possible, = / asked, that there
are ladies who will walk around and
around their rooms on their hands
and knees"
Hands and feet" ~ she said, inter-
rupting me; ION their four palms,
t'There really are such personsgn
81 am one" said she.
"And are there ladies who lie on
their backs and gesticulate with all
their limbs, like an overturned beetle
endeavoring to right himself?n
Eyes, yes,n she said; 'sand it's most
beneficial. You don't know how bene-
fetal it isl
will you kindly tell me where
your sense Of humor is when you are
engaged in these most peculiar per-
formaDces?n
II don't know said the lady. II
think it must be wherever it belongs.
Why?r
"Oh, nothing,nI replied, picturing
in silence to myself the utter impossi-
bility of my locking my chamber door
ana Transforming myself into a circus
of such dimensions. Breaking the
silence, / asked:-"And do you go up
and down stairs on all fours, as some
do?''
sOh, no. she replied, with a sigh.
TT is impossible for most persons to
do that. One must be alone in the
house to make it possible. It is a
pity, for it would be very beneficial.
AS we can't do that, we are ordered to
take carriage rides over the toughest
roads in town. "-Cbatte9.
Like Meets Like.
The anxiety of newly married
couples to appear like old married
folks is proverbial. When ex-Secre-
tary of the Navy Whitney. then a
promising young attorney, was united
in marriage to Miss Flora Payne they
started from Cleveland ON their wed.
ding trip firmly resolved to appear as
if they had been married for years.
Now, ii ! appear a little cold" said
u1It WAlbtlSJ W hio 0AldC, 10
member | am only acting my
part" When the train reached Ash
tabula a verdant couple. showing be-
yond all doubt that they had just
come from the altar, came into the car
where Mr.. and Mrs Whitney were
seated. why, anybody could tell
that that couple had just been mar
ried,n said MI. Whitney. Just look
at the mans pumps, the woman's
flowers and all that. Nobody would
doubt hal they are bride and groom.
Their dress shows that to anybody,
but | don't believe we look quite 50
green"
After a few hours the train stopped
at a station and Mr.. Whitney left the
car for a few moments to smoke a
cigar. AS he paced up and down the
platform enjoying his Havana the
Ashtabula groom stepped up and
asked Mr.. Whitney for q light. The
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