The St. Johns herald., 1890-09-25
HAD A RAT-TRAP.
But He Made Mistake in Waking Cp Q
 Passenger.

 But He Made Mistake in Waking Up g
 Passenger. ' It was on one of the Sound steam CTS coming down the other day. 4 man of middle age and much dignity had fallen asleep in his rocking-chair on the promenade deck, when he was approached by a sharp-nosed, hawk eyed man of forty, who had a parcel ln his hand.
 "Hey-your' he exclaimed, as he slapped the sleeping man on the shoul- der.
 "Sir! How dare you?" sternly de- manded the latter, as he reused up.
 .I haven't done any thing that ! can be sent to State prison for, have I?'' ''What is your business with me, sirP''
 That's better. That's coming to the point. Let me draw up chair and take it easy as we chat You told me at Stonington that you thought you would order twelve dozen as { starter. Suppose you double the
 
 Sir, what are you talking about and who do you take me for?" de- manded the man.
 "Your name isis Faxon-frm oi Faxon 6 Brown, dealers in hardware, isn't it?''
 "No, sir!''
 "What! Why, I'd bet @ farm agir a wheel-barrow that it was! Didn we have a conversation at Stoning tonP''
 ''No, sirr'
 Didn't show you my centennial rat-trap and exhibit it's worlzings?"
 "No, sir!'
 Didn't demonstrate the fact that i would catch and hold any thing iron a mouse to a raccoon, and that th- public was bound to buy millions O. 'em?''
 ''Sir! Do you intend to insult shouted the other.
 '.N0 0t for Joseph. I never insula nobody. It's curious if I have mad mistake. Didn't you spend half e hour yesterday Investigating my ant friction, double leverage, anti-cogles centennial rat-trap, warranted t clean out a whole county of rats, mice chipmunks, gophers and rabbits in side of ten days, or no payP"
 ''No, sir! No, sir!''
 ''Well, that's queer! I'd take my afidavy it was you. And you didn'J order twelve dozen, to be shipped the first of the weekP''
 Never! You ought to have more sense and manners, sir! Go away about your business!'
 My business is to sell the centen- nial rat-trap-only thing ever invent ed to entice rats without bait; nodeli- cate machinery to get out of order; no cost for steam power to run it. If l have made a mistake beg your par don"
 linen go away, sir-go away be fore forget my position and do you injuryr'
 You wouldn't injure a feller for wanting to sell you.a rat-trap which lays over all other inventions in America, would youP If you ain't the man who ordered the twelve dozen, you may want to give me an order just the same. I will show you how it works.
 ''No. you won't! Go away, sir-go, or I'll do you harm! You are the most impudent rascal I've met in @ yearr'
 '.And you won't look at my trap?" ''No, sir!''
 ''And you want me to leave you in solitudeP"
 '.At once. sir!"
 "Well, I'll do it. Some folks force their inventions upon the public. That ain't my style. My centennial rat trap speaks for itself l go, sir; but leave my card. Peruse it at your leisure. All mail will reach me promptly at that address. Send you 8 dozen on trial, or give you a.discount of five per cent. on all over three dozen. Send in your orders as early as possible, as the season is forward. Au revoir, sir. "-N. '. Sun,
 Wood Pavements in Europe.