The Dickinson press. (Dickinson, Stark County, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1883-1927, 1890-05-31
LAWYER ALIENS FIRST VICTORY.
A Bad Case Made Good by Profound
Opinion from the Classics,

Opinion from the Classics.
"Private John Allen," of Mississippi,
who became the wit of tho house of
representatives with the death of Sunset
Cox, tells good story OH himself of how
he came to be q profound lawyer.
A party of members were telling yarns
in the cloak room Of the house, and when
Aliens turn came he told this one:
II want to tell you of the greatest legal
victory of my life," said Allen, as he
lighted cigar and propped his feet
against the wall in true southern style.
"1t was down in Tupelo during the trying
period just after the war. was at that
time practicing lawyer-that is, I prac-
ticed whenever had any cases to prac-
tice with. One day old Uncle Pompey,
one of the old negroes of the settlement,
came into my office and said:
"'Mars John, wants you to c'lar me.
Use gwine to be rested for stealin' of two
hams out'en de cross road store
"'Well, Pompey,' asked, did you
steal the hams?
MARS John, 1 just took 'em.'
Did any one see your asked.
"'1as, boss,' said the old negro dis
consolately, two ole white buckra's.'
"'Well, Pompey,' 1 replied, Il can't dc
anything for you under the circum-
stances
"'Now, Mars John,' said old Pompey,
heres ten dollars. l jist want you to
try
"Well, I consented to try," said Allen.
"The case was to be heard before all old
magistrate named johnson. He was
totally uneducated, and was moreover a
perfect dictator, and no negro ever came
before him who was not fined the maxi
mum penalty and sent to his field to OK
plate the crime i'll the sweat of his brow.
"The magistrate heard the case. Every
possible proof was brought to show that
Pompcy stole the hams. There could be
no doubt of it from the testimony. Ibid
not put a single question to any of the
witnesses, but when the testimony was
all in l arose, and in my most dignified
manner addressed the magistrate:
"'May itplease your honor, it would be
useless for me to argue before one who
would adorn the superior if not the su-
prcme court bench of this grand old
commonwealth. And may say that
those who know you best say that you
would grace even the supreme court of
the United States, the highest tribunal
in the land. 1t will be useless to dwell
upon the testimony. You have heard it,
and know the case as well as do. How
ever, it may not be out of order for me
to call your honor's attention to short
passage in the old English law, which
clearly decides this case, and which, for
the moment, your honor may have for
gotten
'Then fishcd down in my pocket and
drew forth, with great flourish, an old
copy of Julius CRsar.' Iopened it with
great dignity to the first page and read
the line which is familiar to every school
boy, 'Omnia Gallia in parties tres divisa
est That decides the case,' said 1,
throwing the book upon the table. THAT
clearly acquits the defendant
"With great dignity and solemnity l
then took my seat. The old magistrate
was completely nonplused. He looked
tee Ae dAlolueAC qulzZlcally anu scratched
his head. Then, turning to Ponpey, he
raised himself to his full height and
said:
"'Pompey, Il know you stole them hams,
but by the ingenuity of your lawyer I've
got to let you go. Git out, said he, as lie
planted his No. 8 in the seat of Pompey's s
pants, 'and if you ever come here again,
lawyer or no lawyer, you will git six
months Atlanta Constitution.