Weekly independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 1887-1914, 1890-08-17
JEST AnD JoLLl1y.

unsuecessfully, and then Fangle sug-
gested: Try \ small number first and
gradually work up"
WOULD you mind" asked the editor
in q conciliatory tone, "if l left of che
first aud last verses Of your poem?"
'.But there are only two stanzas in it"'
sented the editor, afiably.
ME;sS q a nice sum in arithmetic: II
the icc-man leaves IS pounds Of Ice for
20 cents worth, when ice is 10 cents per
100 pounds, what will homemade ice
cream cost when he leaves e5 pounds for
10 cents worth when leo Is so cents per
pound?
"ToMMY," said his mother, do you
think you'll get a prize in the school
for being good?" ''No, ma" said Tom
my. "Why not, STRIP asked his father,
sternly, laying down his paper. BE
cause they don't give any," answered
Tommy, meekly.
"kEErs coming right down. don't it?"
cheerily remarked young Shallowpate
to Uncle Sowersby. Uncle Sowersby
Eeckoned him in out OF the storm, care
fully adjusted his glasses, and then SOL
cmnly remarked: Young man, did you
ever see rain go up?"
PENSION AGESr-'Want a pension,
eh? What's yonr clamp Friend
''Naal, my grandfather was the third
husband O. the widow OF a veteran of
1919, an as near as ] can figger it out
there amt no one but me left to repre-
sent the old lady's claim"
JUNGLE JonS," said little Emily. 'do
you know that 4 baby that was fed on
elephants milk gained twenty pounds
in 4 weck?" Nonsense! impossible.'
exclaimed Uncle John, and then asked:
Whose baby was it?'' ut was the Gle
plants baby" replied little Emily.
SUPERINTENDENT feel sure Grcggs
is going to demand a twenty per cent. in
reese in his salary" Manufacturer
as that SO? Call him up at once and
tell him We are compelled to reduce his
wages twenty per cent. We can after
wards compromise and let him stay at
tho old figures. See?"
First Tramp-"Met a old Teller up
the road yesterday that thinks tina when
a man dies his soul goes into some ma
chine or other. Thinks he's got his "
grand-daddy in a old pump" Second
Tramp-"Well, that there amt such a
bad notion. lust think Of a Teller bein'
turned into a beer keg when he died.
Eli, Ierryf"-Terre Haute Express.
Johnnie, you must stop playing with
those Murchison children across tho
way. They arc common, and their
father is n nobody" "a nobody?,
echoed Johnnie. "Why, / guess you
don't know him, ma! He ate twenty
h~ard-boiled eggs in twenty minutes,
and his likeness was in last weeks Po-
lice Scrapings. Next week he's going
over Niagara Falls in a barely. Y.
Ledger.
Mrs. Mushroom-"Well, altogether,
1 I'm not so very sorry that l have not
any ancestors" Miss Mushroom-"Why,
mamma, L thought you rather regretted
that we had none that We know off,
Mrs. Mushroom-"I have changed nv
mind. / nave been to call on Mrs. Mon
taguo Devereaux n she showed me all
the portraits OF her ancestors Miss
Mushroom-"And didn't you like their
looks?" Mrs. Mushroom-"Oh, tho peo-
pie was good enough, / s'pose, but I
wouldn't WI ancestors that dressed
AS6oA ANA ' 10. -kAiltElCa-
The Ohio Serpent Mound.
The famous Serpent Mound, in
Adams County, o., where the Peabody
Museum OF American Archaeology has
long had workers uncarthing the Sc
crets OF the strange structure, has been
bought and turned into n magnificent
park. for perpetual preservation. 1t
is the most notable OF all tho mounds
OF this country. Prof. Putnam has re-
Gently found reasons for reversing tho
opinion that had been growing among
scholars, thnt this mound. and all sim
ilnr structures. were tho work OF Cher
okee or Shawnee. OIL other historic
tribes OF Indians. lie concludes that
ut least tho Serpent Mound was the
work OF IL race OF men either identical
with the ancient Mcxicans or akin TO
Thorn. Tho preservation OF u most
important and characteristic monu-
ments OF antiquity should engage not
only our universities. but tho Govern
mcnt. Harvard. with Prof. Putnam.
has so far been left 10 do the work in
Ohio. 81 Louis Globe Democrat.
a chooi- Ma'am's I.awsuit.
Miss Kato Kennedy, who has been n
teacher in tho public schools OF San
Francisco for NOR" than twenty years,
has just gono through a years fight
with tho board o. education, and ostab-
lishcd tho principle that tho board can
not discharge teachers without cause.
Miss Kennedy, having obtained n lcavo
OF absence, made n visit East, and was
surprised upon her re. RI to ind that
her place bad been given to her substi-
tutc. Tho board Of education coolly in
formed hcr that sho was not wanted,
~whereupon sho brought suit to test the
legality Of her discharge, meanwhile
making formal application every month
for her salary. She won her caso in tho
lower courts; and now tho Supreme
Court sustains these decisions, and or.
dcrs that sho DO restored and receive
her back salary.
Auburn Hair Has the Gan.
a st. Louis hair-drcsscr SAYS oyery
body now is calling for auburn hair. II
Is tho color above all others in favor in
tho world Of fashion. rho shade 4,
very becoming, especially TO women