The Hot Springs star. (Hot Spings [Hot Springs], Dakota [Dakota Territory, i.e. S.D.]) 1886-189?, 1890-03-21
PLEASANT PARAGRAPHS

ApnEcIous pair-diamond earrings.
The undertaker's favorite exercise is
boxing.
An official organ is one that has an
authorized crank to turn 1t.
LOVE is . species of intoxication that
swells the heart instead Of the head.
IT was q thoroughly sophisticated
young woman who asked the waiter for
. stack of Saratoga chips.
BRowN-Does your wife keep her
temper very wells Jones-Um-er-
some; but 1 get the most of it.
FENCING classes for ladies are very
popular now, and we don't wonder
ladies are SO fond of making thrusts at
each other.
MorHER--You'd better put on a veil.
The wind will chap your face. Clara
Never mind. A chap never hurts my
face. I rather like the sensation.
TEAcHERl would like some one of
the class to define the meaning of vice
versa. Bright boy-It's sleeping with
your feet toward the head of the bed.
WAITER Ito Uncle Greencorn)-What
is your order, sir? Uncle Greencorn-
I belong to the Masonic order ut Stur-
upville, thank ye. Can't I have some-
thing to eat?
DIGN1F1ED Mamma When that
young man left you last night, 1 heard
something which sounded like a kiss.
Dignifed daughter-Did you? How
does a kiss sound, mamma?
"THEY say the Gar doesn't mean to
he so harsh to his subjects" GLOW SOP"
Because ven when he puts the small
est of the Nihilistsi upon trial for his life
the Gar is only trying q little Russo"
A GOOD thing can be carried too far.
A Boston man, who had been told that
he was about to die, asked the doctor
for his bill, saying that he did not like
to depart from his lifelong rule, "Pay
as you co.
You've Bride (pouting) Here we
have only been married two days, Clar-
ence, and you're scolding me already /!
Husband! know, my dear-but just
think how long I've been waiting for
the chance!
Nh. YOUNGER (meeting Miss Winters
on the street)-Why, how do you do?
Miss Winters with a cold stare)-You
have evidently made a mistake, sir.
MIR. Younger beg a thousand par
dons-I mistook you for your mother.
sIF I only knew what to give my
uncle for his birthday! He is SO very
saving that, no matter what you give
him, he will always put it away and
never use It." "Oh, that is easy; fill
half a-dozen bottles with water, cork
and seal them nicely, and label them
old Rhine Wine, $780,"
WHITE Citizen: sWell, jackson,
what are you doing for a living now ?
Co!ored Citizen: "Ain't dom nothin';
de ole woman takes in washin'." White
Citizen: SAINT you ashamed of your
self to allow your wife to support you
by washing?" Colored Citizen: aWell,
boss, my ole woman am q mighty ignor-
ant niggar, an doan' know how to do
muffin else"
TARDY WIT.
A bright little mar sat bemoaning the fate
OF the wit that IL tardy and sparkles too late;
OF the Keen repartee that is strictly ones own
But comes into view when occasion has flown.
Oh! the ideas. opposite. bright and sublime.
1nat travel IKE 6tage-cOaches, never Oh time, Z
So sluggish III movement, 80 slow In the race
That q new topic renders them quite out OF
place.
So the bright little man, with a serious look,
Remarked TO himself as he opened tho book,
Q regrets that annoy O huMorist's head,
Thu saddest is this: 1t might have been said!r
FAREWELL, dearest" she sighed as
she lay against the lapel of his double
breasted coat; sand George. you may
kiss me once on my forehead ere you
go "Thanks, Angeline," thoughtfally
murmured the young man, "but the last
time I kissed a girl on the forehead
got o bang in the mouth" A moment
later he left the house, looking as if he
had been eating marshmallows.
A YOUNG man writes to inquire If II
is proper to take hold of young lady's
arm in promenading. Certainly it is.
Nothing looks so nice as to see q tall
youth walking with a little lady who
comes not up to his shoulders, with his
arm hooked in hers, lifting her half off
her feet every time he steps. The
nearer you can reach the appearance Of