New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1890-02-02
AWKWARD CHRLSTENINGS.
EMBARRASSING MOMENTS AT THE FONT.
A D1CrAToRIALo OLD PASTOR WHO MEANT WELL
BUT OVERSIGHT THE MARK-THE BASH
Full PARENT.


number Of clergvmen were chatting the other day
over dinner at Cark's given by church club. when
the conversation turned on the old syle Of dctatOria
preachers who used to bully their ocks and attempt
to lay down the law for their temporal as well as
spiritual guidance.
81 remember ludicrous instance Of the kind, said
one when two Of his humble parshioners came before
the little pope of backwoods circuit and brought
their baby to be baptized.
" what name do you give this child p he said.
"Now the woman lisped and the preacher was
rather deaf so that when she replied Luthy. thr p
meaning Lucy SIR he started back I'm surprise.
"'Whatp he calculated.
"sLuthy, thir,' repeated the embarrassed mother.
"'Luciferr Numbered the outraged pastor Non
sense woman. Would you name your child after the
devil? would as soon call him Judas Iscariot. and
dipping his hand in the font he stihed the infants
soueals with liberal dose of the water full in its
mouth adding with JUNCTION:
"'John Wesley. baptize thee
And the trembling parents accustomed to letting
the old man have his in all things went quietly
out with their little girl bearing that famous. If not
exactly feminine. name.'
"That's pretty good story" said another of the
PARTY and reminds me Of somewhat similar. though
not so funny case where the parents wanted to call
the child julius Caesar. but the minister remarklna
severely None of your heather Names dubbed II
Simon Peter. But that class of parshoners who are
willing to submit their viii to the pastors whm
is not common, nowadays in cities anyway. and anv
preacher who attempted such thing would be likely
to get piece Of her mind from the good WIFE !
remember unwttlngly offending such one when /
was young in the ministry.
Il had performed the ceremony and was making out
the certificate and registering the christening in nay
book Forgetting the day Of the month, sad 10 inc
Let me see-this is the twelfth, is it notp
The twelfth broke in the indignant young
mother It's only the second, and you baptized the
first yourself. If you vistc1 us oftener you WouIa
not make such absurd mistakes. Inc t"eHth' III
1T took me some time to assure her that had in
tended no reelection on her age.'
II used to feel awfully nervous over baptisms be,
fore got married and had children OF my own aoued
another of the cergymen when haG 10 taHe INC
baby from its mothers arms before the whole conge
CATION. 1 never failed TO grab 1t the wrong way, II
seemed to me at first and invariably set the most
raSsneH and to tie delight of the young people in the
congregation. one day good Ola mother sIg f Far
an instant and came back bearing clever ana pretty
have made up my mind, Mr.. M she said
from watching you handle the babies that are brougRt
to you for baptism Chat you need few lessons III oo
yate with the baby as an objectless0n, and nobody
Will be any the wiser, but your own Comfort as wen
as that OF the congregation, not 10 SPEAK u '"'
was little staggered at first by the novel prop
osltion but soon fell into the humOr OF IT, ana aitSr
few Instructions from the old adys stock OF mother
lore handled that child like father Of twins. ana s09I
became so expert that l have queted many squaWi,
ing child at the font and restored it TO IT'S mother
arms cooling and soothed. In fact found ont long
after was married that my wife first took HIKING
TO me- as they say, from seeing the mastery way IN
which quoted a particularly bad baby, WHICH had
set the whole congregation a-hdgetting" 49,,
AZ once met a case" the speaker ADDED, "wnere
a yOung couple whom l had married at the same
altar came to me TO baptize their first child inc
father was unusually young and abashed ana looked
even younger than he was. me wlie was sen p9 }
sessed enough and had evidently coached him for the
ceremony. His embarrassment was SO great, now,
ever that when | said TO him, in the due course OF
the service Name this child he looked helplessy
at his better half. - s - A.,
tho con gre gation some OF whom began TO smile.
!. The wife nndgcd him, however, and he woke up
answering in a clear voice:
~ WILL 81. . IL. ~. u
still fresh in his mind as it indeed in the minds
~ many present and his pat reply ticked them so
that ID was with difficulty decent order was pre-
ruad