The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-11-12
BRIGHT BITS

STRANGE To say. everybody likes to see a
square man 'round.-Boston Commercial Bull
letia.
BEWARE of the under-tow-when you see a
blonde young woman in a black wig.-Terus
SJtngs.
BE fiIrtuous and you will be happy" as the
young lady remarked to her friend.-Lawrence
Ameracdn.
FOR every industrious man there is an idle
one wanting to borrow money of him-Atchi-
son Globe.
parkey Warrant OATS good; but TO de
Lawd. don't got de face ter do t.-Neto York
Morning Journal
THOUGH there are cycles of time, it is reason
able To assert that the old gentleman never rode
them.-JetDeters' CIrcutar.
HAPPINESS is good deal like butter in one
respect--it goes further when it is spread on
thin Birmingham Leader.
SOME PEOPLE who are sure that they could
never tell lie have never had an adequate
temptation. Sooner DIlLe journal.
'.PLuSKrTT.' said Ducketts. IF you had a
million, what would you do:''
wish 1 had another" replied Plunkitt-
Puck
BEFORE election the candidate finds your but
ton hole almost as useful a thing to hang on as
he afterward finds tne pigeon holes into which
he slows your requests. Puck.
WHEN a wise man said Pine feathers make
fine birds, he put sarcasm in the mouth OF
| bird OF paradise that flies by.-Atchisor. Globe.
BEARS live mostly on plants and fruits re-
marked the teacher.
I'm New York they live on lambs" inter
rupted Tommy, who reads the newspapers
| Racket.
MAuDE DO you believe that 1.-The course of
| true love never runs smooth?
Mabel-Hm. Well l don't know. There's a
| hitch at every marriage, anyway.-Boston
Traveller.
| Mr.. YouNGMAN Cafter long thought)-Is there
any way to find out what a woman thinks of
| you, without proposing?
Mr.. Benedict (abSently)-Yes; make her mad.
| Good NeUs.
THINK that young doctor understands his
! business pretty well?''
Il think not. 1 heard several of the older
| physicians praising him yesterday. "-IndiGn-
| dpois Journal.
Mas. DE BoRT-Dear, l think Mr.. Corral who
recently made his fortune in Texas, is a veri-
| table rough diamond.
Jeweler de Bort-Tnen, my dear, we ought to
| cut him.-Jet0eters Weekly
HELLO, Patching up your togs?' asked the
| light comedian.
| mo; I am Just taking little lay-off. ~
| answered the end man. as he continued to
scraps the egg from his costume.-IndiGnapo
| lis JOHi ma.
He docking dresmlly into his cup}--What's
|
She dndignantly)-Why no; that's coffee. and
| good coffee, too!
/ He-Wel, isn't that MISUNDERSTANDING
| Chronicle
| DISTRESSED Young Mother travelling with
| weeping infaut) Dear, dear, don't know what
| to do with this baby.
Kind and Thoughtful Bachelor Gin next seat)-
Madam, sail l open the window for your
| Boston Courier.
New SPIRGr-Was that very bad man you
| just turned away?
st. Peter-No; bis record is good enough
| but he's been the head man in a small town all
his life, and l know there'li be no living with
him.--NeW York Weekly.
THE difference between an embezzler and a
| Napoleon of finance is practically naught."
/ How do you make that outy"
We'll, it matter of one or more naughts
Steal thousands and you are an embezzler steal
millions and you are the other thing So.
Joseph NetCS.
WHAT, my child! You danced last night
with the colonels' And he goes to balls while he
yet wears rnournings What light man he
must Beg
oh. but mamma, really you should have
seen how beautifully sadly he dancedm-ETie-
! gerde Bldtter.
Mr.. TICKs-Adam was certainly in great
| luck
Miss Wickles-How was that?
Mr.. Ticks-Why, when he got wife he had
| only to give up a rib, and now it takes all the
backbone a man has just to think of getting
married.-Boston Courier.