Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1890-07-12
THE ARIZONA KICKER.
A Number Of Points which the East Ca
Not Duplicate.

A rumbsr Of Points which the East C&m
Not Duplicate.
We extract the following from the last
issue OF the Arizona Kicker:
DIDN'T Know IT WAS LOADED. Smith
a Davis minstrels were billed for an
entertainment at Montezuma Hall las,
Friday night, but IT didn't come of.
Instead of that the whole gang stepped
of. They came here with the avowed
intention OF doing business without the
aid of the Kicker. None Of them called
at the Office and they had no courtesies
20 extend. We advised the people 70
stay away. On Friday morning, seven
members OF the gang entered our Office
70 demand satisfaction. They didnt
know 1t was loaded. It was, however,
and when IL went of some of tho bird
shot got in on each and every one Of the
gang, and we had 10 tap one of the end
men with an ax-helve in addition. We
haven't any one in this town who makes
q speciality of digging lead out of the
human system, and at noon they started
for Tombstone to give a man there \
weeks job. Hic jacket which is Mexi-
can for saying: THE Kicker is always
loaded"
WE TOLD You So.-Six weeks ago q
man named Scott opened grocery store
on Comanche street, and when we casu-
ally dropped in and mentioned the fact
that the Kicker was the best advertising
medium In the West, he didn't enthuse.
We knew there was something wrong
about him, and we sent his description
TO the sixty-four sheriffs and chiefs Of
police who are constantly in communi-
cation with us. Last Thursday. just
after we had gone TO press, detective
arrived from Louisville and collared Mr..
Scott, who Is q defaulting county treas
nrer. He has leftus, and we bought the
stock OF groceries at about twenty-five
cents on the dollar Had Mr.. Scott ad-
vertised he would doubtless have built
up a. large and profitable business; but
he took wrong view of ii and will
probably go to State prison for fifteen or
twenty years.
Pooh oLD PALsy!--we never refer TO
our contemporary down the street II we
can avoid it, In the first place he hasn't
got enough brains or Office to deserve
the title, and in the next he Is poor,
palsied old man who is gradually dying
of envy and starvation. and we shall
have TO foot his burial expenses when
he does go. The other week we men.
toned our private graveyard and It's five
occupants. This so excited the jealousy
OF the old relic of the seventeenth cen.
tury that he borrowed revolver and took
atrip around town yesterday In search oi
blood. He finally found one Of Colonel
McCracken's Digger Indians asleep in
the sun and opened fire on him from a
distance of four feet. He didn't ever
wake the redskin up, and Judge Tall
man. who objected to so much noist
around his house, went out and drove
poor old palsy away with broom.
We are sorry for him. They say he
cried while going back TO his one-horst
alleged newspaper, and no wonder. HI
should never have come West. HI
came, as We ascertained, TO evade ar
rest for bigamy, but he should hav'
taken some other route. When natur.
fits man 10 raise hollyhocks in Ney
Jersey, he has no business coming wes
20 try TO raise that other product
Nor HIS FAuLr--A number of ou
towns-people have expressed the hop'
that we would pitch into DIR. Staghorn
the popular druggist, for killing oil
man Slew by putting up arsenic for qui
nine in a prescription. We shall d
nothing of the sort. The doctor has no
only increased his advertising ene-hal
fhta hnt hna a,tf f,aa bod for Htt
copies OF the The Kicker to send away
While this of course does not infuenc
us in the least, we know from persona
observation that the doctor Is a YER
busy man, and that the room in hi
store is limited. He has no choice hu
TO keep many different sorts OF powder
in the same drawer and it is only to b,
expected that mistake should happe
now and then.
Furthermore, who was old Slew, any
how? A lazy, dissipated vagabonC
whom the boys would have hung in tn
course OF few weeks at best. In foo
ing his funeral expenses the dooto
has shown himself very liberal and fai
minded, and he has shown himself
various ways that he belongs TO thS
class wanted in this town 10 build IL VI
No EXTRA CHARaE.-In this issue "
publish the full particulars of two ex,
cutions, one Jail delivery, three shootin
ARRAYS, one highway robbery. two III
fights, three dog fights, one found deas
adrowning accident, the arrest of a roa
agent, the deaths OF two Mezicans
the late blizzard and the stealing
Judge Sprouts four-mulo team.
The thing down tho street which cal
itself newspaper, and talks about i
lightning press and its wild-eyed corr
of editors from New York, has, to mate
all this, a cooked-np account OF q figl
between q jackass rabbit and COVER
ment camel. with it's editor for the so
spectator and reporter. Is 1t any wo
dor that the people of Arizona can
wait for the Kicker 20 be issued eaC
week. and that dozens OF them roost {
our door-steps all night Wednesds
night TO get copies the first thing Thur
day morning? All this and no ext
charge, and no hand-bills out announ
ing that anything unusual was going o
Detroit Free Press.
~=------
Romance of Molar.
II any one Is casting about for pl
~. Il. l..