Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-05-02
Mrs. Austin as a Crusader.

sHave you read what those ono
out West went and done the other day?H
Mr.. Austin asked his wife as they sat at
the breakfast table.
Dunno whether [ have or not" re-
piled Mrs. Austin, somewhat testify.
She wasn't feeling very we'll that morn
ing, because her hired girl had quit her
in a huff and she was compelled to do
the homework until another one could
be obtained.
CHATS just like you," said Mr.. Aus
tin, impatiently, you never seem to
take any interest in the affairs of your
SEX"
Got about all I can do to look after
our own affairs replied Mrs. A., with
more spirit than she often displayed,
but she was nervous and tired.
"All ove the world women are rising
up and endeavoring to throw off their
thraldom," cried Mr.. A., grandilo-
quently. after being crushed down
for centuries they are beginning to as
sert their manhood-Imean their wom-
anhood, and to show that they will no
longer be trodden down under the iron
heel Of the oppressor."
What have the mi been doing
out West?" asked Mrs. Austin, with
dawning interest, although she had a
West was located.
"In a body they tackled the demon,
Alcoholic" said MI. Austin, putting great
emphasis on the last word.
A.. "Gracious!" cried Mrs. Austin; "do
you mean to say they took to drink in a
body? How dreadful"
"No, no! They made an attack on
King Alcohol in his stronghold, the sa-
loon. They v%anquished the saloon
keeper, seized mis- poisonous stuff and
emptied it into the street. Ah!" cried
Mr.. Austin, rising to his feet and point
ing to an imaginary group of strong
minded women smashing bottles and
demijohns, "there are women to adj
mire!"
But, john" said Mrs. Austin, dole
fully, would you want me to break
into saloons with an axe and go to
smashing in the heads of whisky bar
rels?"
"You would if you were at all in
spired with the spirit Of the Crusades-
if you recognized the true mission of
women, to battle against wrong and
clear the moral atmosphere of the times.
All, Mrs. Austin, you are not equal to
the demands of the hour. You do not
possess the heroic spirit of those brave
and noble women of the West. How 1
could admire and worship you if you
were made of that sort of stuff, and
would emulate their glorious example"
Mrs. Austin was silent for a moment,
then rising hastily she went into the
kitchen. She quickly returned with a
look of tirmness on her face and the
kitchen poker in her hand. She strobe
resolutely to the side-board, and brings
ing out a demijohn Of "Old Rye she
smashed it with one blow of the poker.
"Mrs. Austin! are YOU crazy" cried
her astonished husband springing to his
feet.
Il suppose I am a little off," cried
Mrs. Austin, deity knocking off
the head Of a brandy bottle. Then she
followed up the attack by assailing the
various bottles of liquor standing on
the shelves.
Wife! wife. you are"
"Im a crusader! Whoopee!!" and
again the poker descended among the
cherished bottles OF select liquors. I'm
going for tbedemon, Alcohol"
But these are for family use," ex-
claimed Nh. Austin, lodging a reckless
swing Of the poker hat came within
dangerous proximity to lis head.
We'll, amt the family using emp
"Stay thy hand, woman" with
stern authority.)
Cant any Of this stuff stay here"
aiming a deft blow at a bottle labeled
"Old Tom Gin"
I'll call the police!"
Call anybody! I'm following your
advice-attacking King Alcohol in his
stronghold. Emulating the noble wo-
men Of the West! Hurrah!"
MI. Austin gazed ruefully at the dew
astation wrought, and then went off in
a rage, while Mrs. Austin went off in a
fit Of Mysteries. -Teras Si.ftings.