davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21
HUMOROUS.

-Jack-"I have pressing question
to ask you, Miss Amy" Amy-'Go on,
Jack. Press ahead. Leigh.
do you believe in fate, Pat?"
"Sure, and phwat would we stand ON
widout 'em?"-Kansas City Star.
-"Great Heavens, what smell! You
can almost hear it. What is it?"
Must be a co1fish bawL"-Puck.
-Debtor-'I want to pay that little
bill of yours" Creditor-"All right,
my dear boy. Debtor-''But 1 can't
Somerville Journal.
did my argument strike you forci-
bly?" Eyes; if you had continued ten
minutes longer would have had brain
fever. r."-Munsey's Weekly.
Mrs. Watts-''What a sweet child
your Willie is. He's perfect angel,
think" Mrs. Potts-"No, not quite.
He takes after his father in some OF his
~ays."-Terre Haute Express
-Prisoner-"Yer honor, would you be
kind enough to discharge me. want
to go of into the country" Judge-'I
am afraid to discharge you, Sullivan.
You are too heavily loaded. Texas
Siftings.
MIR. Bullion-"You are far too young
to marry my daughter. You are only
eighteen" Tom-'Yes, sir, but Miss
Julia is thirty-four, so the two of Us
would average about right"-The Bos-
tonian.
-"l can see now why you advertise
rooms for single men," remarked an ap-
plicant to the landlady. "Why?" Be
cause the rooms are too small to hold
double ones Judge.
Little Miss Lily was paying her first
visit to the country. Seeing some birds
in meadow, she exclaimed: Poor
little brides Of the field! They haven't
even cage to sleep in. Judge.
This is the season when you ask
the bartender to mix you drink to
keep out the heat, and he gives you the
same prescription you took last winter
to keep out the cold. P. $50 we've
been told. .-Norristown Herald.
Little Tommy had spent his first
day at school. l.-'What did you learn?"
asked his auntie on his return. Didn't
learn any thing" said Tommy. "Well.
what did you do?'' Didn't do any
thing. A woman wanted to know how
to spell cat and told her" ."-Louis-
vile Tib-Bits.
Now look here" said the Professor
to the infuriated Bull, you are my
superior in strength, am your superior
in mind. Let US arbitrate this matter
and see which should by right get tho
better of our controversy" "Oh, no."
replied the Bull, 'let's toss up for it."
Later.-The Professor lost-N. Y. Sun.
Each has its good and evil side;
Jekyll, alternate with Hyde,
To tickle or to trouble.
Thus history repeats itself;
The apples green the small boy eats
Are sure to make him double.
-Philadelphia Press
Now, my friend, what will you do
with all that money!" said an old gen.
tleman to tramp to whom he had given
nickel. Tramp gazing at the coin)-
''Well, guess I'll 60 to the races and
bet some of it. If lose l reckon I'll
spend the simmer at Asbury Park in
stead of going to Saratoga. Texas
Siftings.
The lesson was about the Darwinian
theory, and when the order came for the
class to close books, Willie knew just
enough about the lesson to get every
thing mixed up. The firstquestion was
put to him: "Who was Darwin?" Willie
scratched his head: Darwin was a per-
son who made men out of monkeys!'-
Philadelphia Times.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21
The News Briefly CnronioIe 9 4.

Tho News Jsrieny ChrOnlcjed.
Recently at Hallock dense clouds OF
grasshoppers were seen going sSpth.
Laborers on the West SevenA street
car line in St. Paul struck f6t higher
wages recently. - 81
The St. Paul Retail Clerlas Union is
taking steps to secure the enforcement
of the Sunday closing laws. @e
Several cars laden with farm imple.
ments were derailed near Rochester
and badly smashed.
DR.. Carl Wirth. OF St. Paul. was fined
$25 for failure to make o return on
case of scarlet fever.
The telephone company in st. Paul
claim to be expending $s5, 600 in putting
their wires under ground. BY Septem.
Der Is they will have builded about two
and one-half miles of conduits
Mrs. John johnson, living north OF
Litchfield, filled a gasoline stove while
it was burning and received injuries
resulting in her death.
The colonist sleeper on the west
bound Great Northern train burned at
Ada the other morning. The passen.
gers lost every thing, barely escaping
with their lives. Conductor Stahl was
badly burned while uncoupling the car.
The damage to property in Lake City
by recent storm will amount to about
S1O,O
During July the Minneapolis police
made 451 arrests; receipts Of the mum.
cipal court were 81, 134.O9, $500 for
criminal business and $225. 90 for civil.
The hull of the wrecked steamer Sea
Wing has been raised by the captain
and crew of the steamer Ed. s.
Du-ant, Jr., and taken away, together
with the engines and barge. 1t is
understood that the owner of the vessel
last named has purchased what remains
of the Sea Wing. The boilers of the
steamer, which rolled out when she cap
sized, have not been recovered. s
The St Paul & Duluth road filed its
statement with the State Auditor re-
Gently, showing earnings Of S612, TAO for
the six months ended June 80, 1890. A
tax of SIS, 1888 was paid -,s'5
Herbert G.. Stout, an ex-postal clerk,
convicted of robbing the mails ut the
June term of the United States Court at
Winona, was sentenced to States prison
for three years. >.a4 1s~t r1 W. Il
Private Martinson, Of company K,
Saltwater, who did brave work in res
cuing people from the Sea Wing
wreck, was confined to his bed in a very
low condition as the result Of exposure
to the elements.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21
PERSONAL AND LITERARY,

General Longstreet is understood
to be writing his military memoirs.
Wesleyan University (Middletown)
has received over $4OO, 900 in gifts the
last year.
Mr.. Robert Barrett Browning has
given the MSS. of his fathers poems to
Balliol College.
Henry M. Stanley's manuscript is
very legible. and scarcely an alteration
is made in folio.
The Emperor of China has sent the
German Emperor large box of play
things-little dragons and things-for
his five little sons.
The Confederate Memorial Liter
ary Society has been formed in Rich
mond to collect literary works and
relics relating to the late war.
Those who advocate spelling reform
in the English language argue that one
letter out of every seven, used accord
ing to the present practice, is absolutely
useless.
Cardinal Lavigerie has an extern
sive acquaintance with modern litera-
ture, especially history and polemics,
though he is known to the world more
as man of affairs than an eloquent
preacher and student.
-Dinah Salifou, an African King,
was so impressed by the splendors OF
civilization at the Paris Exposition
that when he returned home, he
ordered all his male subjects to wear
trousers. So they have kill ed him.
Like many other wise elderly man,
Francis Parkman, the historian, has
taken to gardening, and is as successful
at it as was Evelyn. He is particularly
fond Of roses. He is writing again,
having in great measure recovered
his health.
John Ross Ward, the British Ad-
miral whose death was recorded re-
Gently, organized the working depart.
ment Of the National Life Boat Insti-
tuition, and during his thirty-one years
of service as General Inspector of Life
Bots that institution saved more than
twenty thousand lives.
The newest and most select club
about London is the Two Pin Club, COM
posed chiefly of Punch's young men,
with the addition of few persons like
Sir Charles Russell and Lord Rose
berry. The two pins in question come
from the names of Dick Turpin and
John Gilpin.
DIR. Heinrich Schliemann is MEM
Der Of the Grocers' Company, of London.
Before he unesrthed ancient Troy and
dug up Agamemnon's tomb at MycenB
the irrepressible excavator sold herrings
and butter, potatoes and milk for over
i've years in . little shop in Fursten-
burg, where he was . grocer's clerk.
1t is an interesting fact that Gold
smiths Deserted Village has been
translated into the Hindu tongue, by
Sari Dbara. 1t is said to have been done
with much skill. 1t is an almost line
for-line translation, and preserves near
ly all the ideas Of the original. -"
The Princess Of Wales uses co0
metic, the nature OF which the ladies In
her court would willingly pay dear for.
Although nearly fifty years OF age, her
Highness has complexion as smooth
in texture and as delicat to in tint as tho
beauty of schoolgirl. 1t will stand
the closest scrutiny, the test OF sun
shine and the electric lantern, and 10
proof to handkerchief sad lorgnsttsL
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21
POTATO CROP A FAILURE.
Dad Reports from States North OF the
Ohio River-Averaging tho Probable
Yield, 1t Will lie the Smallest Ever
Known.

Dad Reports from States North OF the
Ohio Rivor-Averxging the Probable
Yield. 1t Will Ne the Smallest Ever
Known.
CHICAGO, Aug. 16. 16.-According to re-
ports from the principal States north of
the Ohio river it appears that the potato
crop this season will be almost a
failure. Averaging the probable
yield in these States it will be
the smallest ever known in one
season. In some parts the failure is al
most complete, in others the yield is
fair, but nowhere above the average.
The surplus will be small, hence prices
higher, though the unfavorable season
precludes the raising of any superior
quality. In many places there will not
be enough for home consumption.
Wisconsin, Minnesota, and the Dako-
tas are the only States in the North west
where there is any prospect Of surplus
Of potatoes, and even there 1t is not
large. The province of Ontario, Cana
da, makes good showing. There is .
tariff of 25 cents a bushel, but prices
are much lower in the province than in
the States, so the tariff would not en-
hance prices above home market in case
potatoes are imported.
There seems to be lamentable short
ageinaKansas, and Nebraska is little
better off. Iowa is favored little
more, but the greatest shortage ever
known prevails in Indiana, Ohio and IL
linois. Although the season began
with an extraordinary fall of rain, con-
tinuing through several weeks, the
principal cause of the failure of the
potato crop seems to be the drought
The last few weeks, the most important
to the crop, were unusually dry, and
caused a scarcity of potatoes in the hills.
The observations upon which the
above conclusions are based cover the
entire area from Nebraska to the At
lantic seaboard, including the States Of
Minnesota, Dakota, Wisconsin, Iowa,
Illinois, Ohio, Indiana, Nebraska, Kan
sas, Missouri, Michigan, Pennsylvania,
New York, Massachusetts,, Colorado,
and the province of Ontario, Canada
DUBLIN, Aug. 16.-The potato blight
is spreading in the counties of Donegal,
Cork, Waterford, Tipperary and LINER
lex. Prices have already doubled at
Westport, where the guardians and the
Government authorities are exerting
themselves to avoid rioting. The
blight has spread to the whole of Gal
way and is not confined to any particu-
lar soil. 1t is partly due to the plant
ing of old seed in old ground, but in
greater degree to the rainy season.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

A CORRESPONDENT of the London Daily
News who is making tour of Macedonia
describes the province as in the possess
sion of the Arnauts. The officials, he
says, are leagued with brigands, and
the lives of Christians are held as moth
ing. He instances a number of out
RACES by Arnauts. At Pristina, party
of Arnauts entered school of Servian
Christians, maltreated the three mas
ters and closed the school. The owner
of a farm at Pristina and his three sons
were murdered by Arnaut raiders, and
on another farm at Prisrend the in
mates were cut to pieces. He says there
are hundreds of other similar cases.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

The new bridge to be built over the
Hudson river between New York and
Jersey City will eclipse the monster
Brooklyn structure. The great central
span will be 1850 feet long, nearly
twice the length of the span over East
river. There are to be five towers rising
to height of 500 feet above the water
1t is one of the most daring feats of en-
gineering undertaken in this or any
other country,
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

AT last after many years of waiting,
there seems to be fair prospect that a
lighthouse will be built on the Dia-
mond shoal at Cape Hatteras. The cape
is considered the most dangerous point
anywhere on the United States coast
line. More wrecks and injuries to ship
ping occur there than anywhere else.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

GENERAL FREMONT, at the time of
his death, was engaged on paper for
the Century, to be called "Finding
Paths to California" 1t was not only
to deal with the several exploring
expeditions, but to narrate the
writer's intimate connection with the
events which led to the conquest and
occupation of the territory. The work
will be continued by Mrs Fremont
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

JosEPH Il. PAINE, who is said to have
been the finest expert penman in the
country, died recently in Brooklyn. He
seems to have been born penman, and
even his youthful productions of pen
and ink were really wonderful One of
his best known works was the emanci-
patton proclamation, nagnifcept
piece of penmanship, which he present.
ed to President Lincoln a short time
before the latter's death. He repre-
sented kind of penmanship, however,
which is but little used now. The orna-
mental style of writing has been ex-
changed for the plain, business hand,
easily read. .
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21
CHURCHES.

I0RESBYTERIAN.- ]. G. RiheldafYer
L pastor. Services every Sabbath at 10: 30
O'Clock AN. and at o'clock p. N. Sab.
bath school at II O'Clock n. <ss
NETHODIST.-Rev F. A. Cone, Pastor.
AtA Services every Sabbath, at 1880 o clock
A. N. and at Pm. Sabbath school at IL X.
THRISTIAN.- Preaching on every Lords
~ Day at 1880 O'Clock A. NJ. and p. NJ, by
J. G Harrison. Sunday School at Il M.
LNP1SCOPAL.-Churc of The Holy Com
L muniOn Rev. :. B. Purves. Service
every Sunday, except the last Sunday in the
month, at lU:3J A. NJ. and P NJ. sunday
school at I'm.
NATHOLIC.-Timeso Of service to be an
~ nounced hereafter.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

THE military draft in Italy in 1888
consisted of 1862, 1925. OF this number
$1,000 could read and write, 1854 could
only read, and 50, no could neither read
nor write. Comparing this proportion
of educated men with that of the draft
of 1885, the general state of education
in Italy has advanced by s 80 per cent
within the last three years. 1t this
progress is continued for the next forty
years, there will not be man in that
country unable to read and to write.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

The next trade to try for a universal
eight-hour day will be the miners. The
executive committee of the Federation
of Labor, in conjunction with the Ma
tional organizations of miners, has
named May l, 1891, as the date for in
augurating the movement, and no con-
tracts are to be made with mine-owners
beyond that date except on an eight
hour basis
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21
EORElGN INTELLIGENCE

DURING storm on the lith at Gre.
feldt, Germany, a house containing
fifty persons fell, and thirteen were in.
stantly killed and twenty badly in
jured.
THE British steamers Halcyon and
Rheubina collided on the 11th near
Vigo. Spain, sinking the former, and
thirteen persons were drowned.
THE eminent English Catho olic divine,
Cardinal Newman, died at Birmingham,
Eng, on the 11th after a short illness,
aged 50 years.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

MRS. THOMAS A. SCoTT's residence in
Philadelphia Is one of the largest
private dwellings in the United States
1t contains as many rooms as good
sized hotel. These are all under the
supervision of a young man, who goes
about with so many keys in broad
girdle around his waist that the trades
men who visit the house call him
''St. Peter. There are seventeen
bathrooms in the house.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21
Transfer Of Weak-Minded Men.

The first installment of eighty insane
FatSea.s arrived. in Fergus Falls from
st. Peter Asylum and are in the asylum
in that city. The car containing them
was run to the door of the asylum and
the transfer made without confusion or
disturbance. The patients are all
men and were set at work about the
asylum and grounds at once.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

CHAUNcEY M. DEPEw says that in some
respects the Prince of Wales is the
best public speaker in Great Britain.
"He is," said Mr. Depew, 'in his manner
Of speaking and in his habit of thought
more like the American speakers than
are the majority of English orators. He
speaks without hesitation, somewhat
rapidly and yet with an ease and alb
sence of the hemming and having
which characterize the public utter
ances of some of Great Britain's clear
est thinkers"
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21
FOR THE FAIR SEX.
A Call Issued for . Woman's Intern
tional Industrial Congress.

A Call Issued for Woman's Intcrna.
tional Industrial Congress.
WASHINGTON, Aug. 16. - Charlotte
Smith, president Of the Woman's Ma
tional Industrial League of America,
has issued call to the women of the
civilized world, inviting them to attend
the Woman's International Industrial
Congress, to meet at Chicago during the
quadro-centennial celebration in 1898
This congress is intended to consider
problems of woman's advancement in
connection with the woman's industrial
department of the worlds fair, which
the league is working to establish.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21
Mortgage for "a, 800. 900 Filed.

The mortgage securing the debenture
bonds of the Pillsbury- Washburn Flour
Mills Company, amounting to some s3,-
500, 900, has been filed at Minneapolis,
and Governor Pillsbury says that this
is the concluding act in the formal
transfer of the mill property from for
mer owners to the new corporation.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

KANSAS CITY, Mo-, Aug. 16.-Wash-
lngton Waterman, one of the most
noted horse-thieves in the West, was
arrested again Thursday for horse.
stealing. Waterman is SO years of age
and has spent twenty-five years in the
penitentiaries of Missouri, Kansas and
Illinois. He completed ten-year term
in the Missouri Penitentiary last
Wednesdav r&" se# aF-..-~g '.,-
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

THIS is the way the great beast Of
Africa goes to his extinction. An ordi-
nary elephant produces 12o pounds of
ivory. worth $500. England consumes
$50 tons, for which it is necessary to
kill II, 600 elephants a year. ssss,,..
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21
Proctor Says No.

WASHINGTON, Aug. 16.-Secretary
Proctor, in an interview expresses him
self as opposed to the filing in of the
outer harbor at Chicago for the worlds
fair site. He said this harbor had been
provided by the Government at great
expense, and he could not see the pro-
priety in running it fol, merely tempo
rary purpose. ~
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21
Absconder RAY Arrested,

License Inspector Enoch Ray, wno
absconded few days ago with over
$1,000 belonging to Minneapolis saloon
keepers, was arrested in Montreal the
other evening by Detective James How;
ard, of Minneapolis. The sum of 1000
was found in his pockets, but it is be-
lieved he has more money.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

Miss EL1zE PINsoN, the bearded wom-
an who died at Wanenton, Ca, few
lays ago, accounted for the growth on
her face by the continual poulticing her
laws for the toothache,
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

STuMM is the great iron king of Ger.
ployes. He is said to have opinions of
his own, and to disregard the views of
others about the conduct of his business,
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21
FROM WASHINGTON

The exchanges at the leading clear-
ing-houses in the United States during
the week ended on the 9th aggre-
gated 81, III, ,642, 226, against 81, ,9s6, 759,
275 the previous week. AS compared
with the corresponding week of 1889 the
increase amounted to 1856
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

MRS. ANDREW HIcKoK, who is in her
ninety-first year, recently astonished
the sojourners at Norwalk Conn
summer resort by swimming long dis
tances and by her capers in the turf
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21
St. Paul Investment Company.

One hundred business firms and indi.
vidual subscribers Of st. Paul met at
the Chamber of Commerce the other
morning and completed the organization
of the Manufactures Investment Com
pany. Fifteen leading men were chosen
directors, and Secretary Phelps an
nounced that $5OO,OOO common stock
had been already subscribed.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

Mrs. GARFIELD lately sold farm near
Prestonburg, KY, to spectators for
$1,000, which General Garfield bought
Turing the early days Of the war for less
! than S7OO
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21
THE Indian idea appears to have con.

THE Indian idea appears to have con-
siderable following in New York. The
World says: 1T has been estimated by
an employe of the United States Bursau
of Labor that there are $1,000 married
men in the city Of NewYork who are sup
ported by their wives, less than 1000 of
whom are in menial service. The mod
istes are in the majority. This includes
dressmakers and milliners, many of
whom own property, some being very
wealthy, and all well-to-do. Boarding
house keepers rank next in number. This
does not include the fashionable young
men who drive swell turnouts and sum-
mer at the beach at their wives expense.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

EMPEROR WILLIAM has developed q
fondness for white horses, but the Ber-
in papers will not venture to trot out
the 'red-haired girl joke" on him.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21
Values in Otter Tail county

The assessed valuation of real estate
in Otter Tail County, as left by the
board of equalization, is S4. 029, 527. The
valuation of the real estate in Fergus
Falls is $751; This is slight fall
ing off from 1888.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21
Property and Life Destroyed by
The Fover Epidemic In London.
AMMAN un Il THE ox k.aonds q =,

LONDON, Aug. 16-The extraordinary
number of those who have succumed to
the fever now epidemic in London is
attracting public attention and exciting
considerable uneasiness 1t is estimated
there are now !, 700 cases in tho differ
ent hospitals.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

Miss WILLING, of New York, denies
that she is going to marry young John
Jacob Astor. She may be Willing, but
the inference is that he never Astor.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1890-08-21

BosToN, Aug. 16-The Letter-Ca
riers' National convention has adopted
resolutions indorsing the movement for
. monument to the late s. s. Cox, the
champion Of the free delivery system.