Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1890-06-05
DECLINE or COURTESY.
Why American Men Are Forgetting the
Gracious Arts of P0lfteasss.

why American Men Are Forgetting the
Gracious Arts of Politeasss.
Your editorial on the decline Of cour-
tesy among men was a statement Of
fact, well known and fully recognized
by every citizen of New York who has
occasion 70 use the various transporta-
ton lines from his home to business, So
ciety, etc, 1t can not be denied that
mans courtesy toward women is declin-
ing among Americans, and it is likely
TO decline still more under present ad-
vantageous circumstances. hut effect
must be preceded hy cause, and, seeing
the effect, let us search for the cause.
You attribute the decline Of courtesy
very largely to the widening Of womans
sphere, making her more and more
self-reliant being, neither needing nor
asking nor caring for the protection and
attention Of man. While this may be
true to some extent, ii is only small
part of the underlying cause Of this de-
cline of courtesy in man. For the main
and true reason we must look further;
we must look TO woman TO show the
cause. As you aptly say, "A tree is
known by its fruit, so let us Judge
men by their mothers 1t is the mother
who is neglecting the culture Of cour-
tesy in her children who is responsible
for this lack of courtesy in man. 1t is
daily occurrence on the elevated rail
roads, in horse-cars, and ferryboats to
see ladies placing their children in
seats, to the exclusion of other women.
who are compelled 10 stand. Or you
can see lady giving her own seat TO a
lady with small child: and then. just
as soon as the next seat is vacated, the
child is deposited from the lap into this
empty seat, even though the lady who
gave up her seat may still be standing.
Is this intoxicating the proper degree of
respect, not to say courtesy and polite
ness IN the young?
Again, an American woman treats
courtesy in man SO much as her right
that she often forgeJs 10 thank one for
a seat or other courtesy, not even deign-
ing to notice the giver. 1t is not the
poor shop-girl, who generally smiles or
bows an acknowledgements. who is at
fault in this respect, but those richly
dressed, with all the outward signs Of
10 AA4ati iitA 94aNts VI 0OtN 5HG
not appreciate his considerations
Is it considerate for lady to remain
out, making her society calls. doing her
shopping, etc, until the hour is at hand
when the large mass of mankind is re-
turning home, tired by hard days
labor? Should she not be at home at
that hour, if only to welcome her nus
band, father or brother from his work.
Or is it any more considerate for lady
70 saunter along the busy thoroughfares
Of our metropolis, preventing business
men, with urgent affairs on their hands
and minds. from passing ahead? Is it,
indeed, so uncourteous to iostle such |
inconsiderate ladies aside in the rush |
and tear Of business?
Further, when man is so gallant as
TO hold door open for the lady behind |
him the lady very frequently passes |
through without taking the door from
him, compelling him to hold it for the
next lady, and SO on, until some gentle |
man takes il from him. This is done /
very often, regardless Of the fact that |
the first gentleman may have lady |
with him, waiting for him, Is man |
treated in this manner apt to grow more |
courteous toward woman?
These are few Of the vital causes |
conducive to a decline Of courtesy in
man toward woman A courtesy or an /
act Of gallantry becomes an act Of impu-
dence the very moment il is not appre-
ciated by the intended recipient, and il |
eourtesies are not worthy Of aeknowl-
edgement they are not worth receiving. I
Cor. n Y Tribune.