Daily Republican., 1890-06-13
numoHs OF THE CENSUS.

Euumcrator. "Give your Christian
name in4ull, pleaee."
Householder. "kioses Lazarus"
Z. Ibid you serve in the rebelIion?"
II. II waited until 1t was all over,
They also servo who only ssand and
Z: "whst's your relationship to the
head Of the iamiiy?"
II. ''Fm her husband"
=. "A.e you white or blacki"
II. "Blue most oil the time"
2. hWhat 10 Jour sexi"
h. "Doubtful. My wife calls me the
old man. aud most Of my friends speak
OF me ~ an old woman"
K. What is your age at nearest birth.
II. "Never had but one birthday. I
was then Of NO age 10 speak Of.
4. "Are you married or single?"
u. Cant you SOC that have no hair
on the top OF my head?"
E .Whst ..A. wa: your place of birth9"
Z. "Whcre was your father borna"
II. II wasn't present on the occa-
sion."
4. "Your motheri,
d. at was 90 long before my own
birth that really don't remember"
+ +. H,'.a H0w many s,..!y yssrs have you been
h. at 10 six years since / left New
jersey"
u. "what Is your professionW
4. ~ have none; Pm an agnostic." 3"
Z. "Are you able to readF'
H: "Almost anything but my own
z. "Can you vrite?"
H. "Those who have undertaken to
read my manuscript say cant't."
E. ''Do you speak Englishl'
Il. .Wkh an ungram matical accent. I"
E. "Whst disease do you suffer
irom?'
H. "My wife's headaches princl.
Z. "Have you any defect in your
mindi'
II. my wife says I'm q coniouud cd
fool but possibly she may be preiudic-
cd"
=. "Have you ever been . prisoner?'
II. II have been locked 10 the en-
brace Of girl; but that was years ago. y
4. "ls your house free from mort
Il. "Do look like an eccentricp
Z. "What live stock have y0uf"
H. "Water bugs and other hugs
mice and limited number of rats"
| Z. "What do you raise in your gar
| den?"
h. "My neighbors' hens attend te
that"
z. ado you hope to be savedi"
h. ~ did before you came; but Aftel
this ! expect to spend the remainder O
my days in profanity such a. will ruiz
my chance for salvation. "-Boston Tran
script
TOO BIG A JOB.
A dusty, weary and foot-sorc census
taker rang the door-bsll Of house OF
Fortieth street late yesterday afternoon
~ am tired. am not used 10 walk
Ing" he said to the man who opened thu
door, II am taking the census OF thii
part OF the city. and will have TO trouble
you fos chair to st on while l ask you
the questions. Thank you. Your name,
pie Sc"
nslorzinstivos BrutklewIez."
"What?"
"siorzlnstivos Brutklewles."
sHave you large familyp
Fifteen Of us. sltergedder."
The census-taher turned pale, looked
Al his watch. closed his book, got up, put
on his hat. went slowly down and out,
| booAN NoA VIZ aAoe bsAoes S0t E0Auk hoA bu
ward, and wrote out his resignation as
soon % he got home.
II am man not easily discouraged.
Caroline" he said TO his wife. "but I've
concluded there's no money In taking
the census at two cents mily."-Chi.
cago Tribune.
FOREIGNERS SUSPICIOUS.
Ono enumerator came In this morning
to get advice o to what to do with lot
of Italians. There are fifteen OF them;
they work for Fred 6winner, the rail
| road contractor, and live altogether In q
| wrecked freight car that lies, without
wheels, at the foot OF Greenwood avenue,
Allegheny.
These Is men keep the car looked rs
closely as possible, and. aside from lis
Inability 10 get in, the enumerat0r does
not particularly desire to enter the car
at all. Each one Of these 15 men gave
him to understand that he could not
speak English. 1t was learned that they
thought the enumerator had come 10
ind out how many OF them were able to
carry arms Tor enlistment IN the army.
One enumerator to-day made grand
objection because he had no saloons In
his dis rict; another said he had only one
veteran aud he could not be found.
There 10 plenty OF exercise about the
work, and the men grumble about their
pay. Ono enumerator spent all day
yesterday among Poles and Russians. or
course there ore no veterans aInvng them
and there Ia not factory IN sight. As
the Poles and Russians are ignorant and
very ely and reticent, 1t is not easy to
make living finding out all about ia bo-
iipskies and Grabovolokofs at two cents
. name.-Pittsburg Chronicle.
CANvAssINa THE FREAKS.
One Of the ceneus ouumerators entered
diwe museum on the Bowery yestsr-
day.
He explained to the proprietor that he
was taking the cendus and that The dime
museum came In his district. The mu
scum owner gave him permission to
question The ''living curiositles."
He began with the Crcassian beauty.
Where were you borni'
II was born In New York." said the
| CircassiAn beauty. s'in dc Ate Ward"
"Where were your parents borni"
my father and mother were born In
Germany"
Whit 10 your uRmei''
Mary Ann Higgins" said the beau
tiful Circassian.
Are you white, black, mulatto, quad
room, 0ctoroon, Chinese, japanese or
"I'n green"
yOrcedl'