Morning journal and courier., 1890-05-23
M MANUFACTURED.
The hand that rocks the cradle Rules the world, as poets say; But it cannot point a pencil,
 Elor if isn.f hlliIt that uau

New York Journal.
 The British capitalists have all the best of 1t. They buy our breweries, but they don't have to drink the beer that is manu- faotured by some of them. Washington Post.
 Bad boy-'.Lick me, an yell be sorry.n Cause, if you do it'll make my hands sore, an if they're sore can't ketoh in to. morrow's game, an If I don't ketoh the game'll be lost an the name O the school dragged in the dust. Sees"-Lawrenos American.
 Son-"Ps, monkey is five times as good as Deacon Good, ain't hea" Pa-"Jimmy, I'm surprised! Why do you say so disrespectful things" son-''Why, you only gave him a cent last Sunday when he came around with the plate, and you gave the organ-grinder's monkey five cents this morning. ."-Texas Siftings.
 Mir. Gotham-"You Say my old friend, who resides in Chicago, has become very un- popular there lately.' Mir. Lakeside (ef Chi oago)-"Unpopular's no name' for it. He's just hated an' detested" Mir. Gotham -"My goodness! What has he done?" MT. Lake, side-"He's been argyin' that all them what subscribed t the worlds fair ought ter pay up."-New York Weekly. Almost Everybody Will Be There.-Q.- 'Do you think that the fair at Chicago will be successf' TT think it will be a success financially. There will be immense crowds there" "But the Chicago people are not going to make much of an effort. {" ''They do not need to make any special effort The fact that Chicago is regarded as the wicked est city in the country will draw immense crowds from all over the United Srates."- Texas Siftings.
 Farmer Wayback-" wife, han me out fhne e11 kt@ l>f I>.- z1 q huntin' knife" Mrs. Wayback-"What dye mean, Phelam, by takin' them to the field with yep "Well, I understand that there's band of premature autographers or | some kind of outlaws comin' through the | country takin' farms and everything else they set their eyes on. oale'late to make 1t pretty lively for lem if they try to take my farm in broad daylight. ."-Chissgo Post.
 Not So Green as He Looked.-"Dinnerl' replied MT. Farbaek to the clerk, as he reg istered at frst-class hotel, 6:30 p. m. "Will I have dinners Nol I won't have dinner, and don't you forgit it, nutherl Ain't you made | mistskei Look at me ag'inl Do look so darn greena jest want ter say to you, young feller, that seen New York long afore you was born-stayed all night, tew-and wasn't humbugged nuther, and ain't goin' ter be I'm ready; but darned if Pm goin' to pay fel dinner after 6 o'clock at night, and I want yer ter jest understand that afore gin ye ur my satchel. ."-Puck.
 You have seen him in the orchestra l With aged, thoughtful face, When care and time have both combined | Their furrows deep to trace. His eyes oft wear far-en look, As if he were aloDe When he plays the part that's written | For the big trombone. l It isn't much-a note or two 1 The harmonies to fill; l It doesn't take remarkable | Intelligence or sl1ill With feelingless precision, | Since to habit it has grown,
 He plays the part that's written For the big trombone And yet the face is delicate, l The forehead broad and high; No doubt replete with promise Was the youth of years gone by, T Ger lot of faded manuscript He looks when he's alone
 Ere he plays the part that's written l For the big trombone. | -Washnpton Post