The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1890-05-09
lelt real pleased to see
50 clipper. Did | tell you I

~ 49,
a-goin' through the village to the station
grandper held up his head like he wus on
parade, and when anybody stopped to
say, why, how dye do? Wllerebe you
goin', Grandper Whitaker he ups and
boilers right out, I'm agoin' tn take the
boys and gals up tn town tn the theayter,
fur tn see my grandson, Jackson Jeffer-
son, perform"
You see, grandper was a perfesser, and
he'd walked upright all his life, and
knowed he wus jest about as good a sany
of 'em, ef not considerbul better.
Every now and then grandper would
turn his head-grandper had a real talent
fur turnin' his head clear round SO it
looked as eff it growed backward-and
say:
.,Tell you, folks see we air ON a spree,
and 1 reckon they wish they could so
along."
So we went ahead, lookin' fur the tents.
Grandper said ~theayters always played
in tents. But we didn't see none. nor no
place fur none but all of a sudden we
came to a great, splendid house w.eh the
name of the t~heayter we wanted to see
up all over it, and great pictures at the
door, and a policeman standin' by the
lamp posts.
Grandper looks around agin and SEE he:
stEben, | reckon things Is got more fixy
sence | wus a boy and went to the circus,
and got whacked for dom it when / got
home. They've got their theayter into a
house, and sure enough, the policeman
said the tickets wus fur that place, and
we went i'll.
A young gentleman, all fixed up like
he wus goin' to get married, showed us
some seats. Grandper he sot down on
the outside one.
.Goldarned eff it don't look like meet
in'!' sez he. "But there's a band, any
way and pretty soon it began to play;
but we didn't see nothin', only a little boy
standin' or some steps jest as eff he WIS
eoin' to come down but felt skeered, until
all of Il sudden up lie went in the air. !
wus SO started shruck right out; but
Jane she said she thought first off it WIS
a big shade with a boy painted onto it.
And then we could see straight into
somebody front parlor, and there wus
lIt iItiD ii tlihiI ~ beloCh uiih Do III
all sorts of things about the family. Then
the door bell rang and in came our Jack
son jefferson, never wus SO surprised
in my life. lie wus all fixed up, and he
didn't take no more notice of us than ef
We waren't there. In q minute l saw
why; he'd come to call on a young lady,
and WIS so taken up by her he hadn't
eyes fur nobody else. didn't mind, but
Jane did. They sot on a sofa and talked
until in come an old gentleman and asked
Jackson Jefferson what he wus there fur,
and told him he didn't want no low down
poor folks comm after his daughter.
Now, there amt nothin' fires grandper
up SO as anybody lookin' down on his
family, and he riz III from his seat like
a fash. lie is six feet two is %grandper,
and his hair is white and grows real
long. He kin be seen quite a distance.
Everybody looked at him so pleased they
had to laugh.
"Iiullo, your says he. "You, l mean,
talking to Jackson Jefferson es eff he wus
the dirt under your feet. I'll hey you
to know that the Binghams and the
Whittakers air as good families as you
kin find anywheres. jackson jefferson
is quite good enough for that gal of
yourn, and as fur bein' poor, I've got
considerable to leave myself; and eff |
hadn't, his pa is ~forehanded, and his ma
has a forty acre farm of her own, be-
sides stocks. jackson Jefferson can
marry Squire Maltby's darter fur the
askin', and eff l was him / wouldn't hcv
a gal that would go round with the bach
of her waist split down SO it amt decent,
when she could patch it with the trail of
her dress and leave plenty to spare to
trip folks up on
Grandper always kin talk eff he wants
to, and the folks they all jest set and
laughed to hear how good he gave it to
that old gentleman, and he neyer SO
much as answered up, and we couldn't
hear what Jefferson said for the noise;
but he went out, and the young lady. she
jest tainted dead away. | WIS sort of
sorry for her. But Jane SAID she was
sure she painted, fur she saw white on
her nose, and then her pa, he jest walked
about and talked to himself until she
came to, and then he told her shed got
to marry somebody or other-I forget
names SO easy that / can't tell you who
he was-and she said she'd die fust, and
went onto her knees. Then folks called,
and they all had tea, and nobody so
much as pulled the shade down, and
some ladies that came they talked, and
a gentleman he made love to the young
lady jackson wanted, and it was real in
teresting, but there warn't no horses nor
no dancing, only after awhile they did
pull the shade down, and the band came
out of the cellar doors and played again.
Perhaps the theayter will begin now"
says g%randper; ''but l don't see no tight
rope"
But in a little while in the band went
again, and the shade went up, and there
was jackson. 1t didn't look like the
same room, and he said he was jest
home and was tired, and grandper said:
"Ay, ay, you had orter keep carly
hours, Jackson"
jackson he said he had the most
awful presentiments of suthin another
dreadful, and grandper said:
"Don't fret, my boy. Your ma is well,
and the rest of the folkses tolerable."
And Their Jackson laid down on the
sofa and ven 70 sleep, and everything
rOt blue. and there must hey been an