Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1890-08-14
JOSEPH'S FATHER.
And the Varying Emotions Which Joseph
Aroused in Him.
Prick

And the Varying Emotions Which Joseph
| Aroused in Him.
| Puck.
Joseph, my SON.
1t was the voice of Squire Buffie. an
honored justice of the peace, an upright
citizen, a consistent church member, and
a gentle village gentleman.
Joseph, my son!''
1t was very calm voice, soft and mild
yet full of determination.
Joseph heard, and reluctantly releasing
the cat, came with downcast eyes to his
ancestor
For Joseph knew from the voice of that
ancestor that something was wrong.
''Sit down, Joseph"
Joseph sat. He also stuck his knuckles
| into his mouth.
Yesterday was Sunday, Joseph
Joseph did not seem disposed to contro-
vert it.
Tell me, Joseph, was not yesterday
| Sunday"
Wees, sir
Sunday, Joseph. Did you hear
me, Joseph? Is it wrong?''
Il reck-reckon So"
And did you fight chickens yesterday,
| Joseph?"
But Joseph only answered with a watery
sniff
Joseph, did you fight chickens yester-
day?"
Joseph gnawed his Rnucl1Ees voraciously
and slobbered.
"Joseph!"
''Tha-that Crump boy-oy, he come along,
and | was a-setin' on the fuh-fenoe, l was,
90 hoo! l was
well, Joseph, proceed; but no cry
ing"
And he-he had a roo-rooster, he did,
and our old red was in the yard, and that
Crump boy said Shoe! I wouldn't have
that old rooster; nohow!'
go on, Joseph
And | said-said: You oughtn't to
talk that way = cause it's SUN
day. -
THAT was right, my son. Go on
And he said 4 bet $50 mine can
whip him And | said: You oughtn't to
bet cause it's Sunday :"
Nor on any other day. Joseph"
Then he said You git owt now! Yo'
old daddy amt nothin but hard-shell
Baptust, nohow, an he robs pc widderS
out n their milk cows, too; an I double
dare yer to open that ere gate an lem
my chicken git at that old feathers an
bones? -
Did he say all that; and bout the wild
ders, too?''
''Yes-sir-ee. An my fingers jus got ter
foolin roun' the latch, an fust thing |
know the gate slipped open, an that
Crump boy flung his rooster at old Red,
an away they went at it, ker-follopT''
And which whipped, Jo?'
''Old Red, [ tell you. Pa, you ies
oughter seen old Red spread himself, and
JUS hollaedg''
''Old Re-ah. Joseph, Joseph, how often
have | expostulated and taught you the
duties of the holy Sabbath? Boys were
different in nay time And he reached
for the switch
Joseph began to tune up again.
| go on. sir
and when holhallaed for old Red
that Crump boy lit into me, he did, an
tuck me side O. de head wild his fist, ye-es
he did,"
Did he? HIT you? Hurt you mach
And what did you do, Jo?''
I'll lit into him, too, an we jes' fit
it out-that's what
Fit, Ell? On Sunday? How often
have l. and the squire gathered Joseph
~ the coat and frightened his grasp ON the
witch.
"Oo-he lit into me fus', and called me
a son of a mud turtle-yes, and he did,
| too-oo!"
"Oh, he did Ell? And you got licked as
usual, reck n?'
Moo | didn't. | whooped him.
"Shuh! That Crump boy? Why, he's
bigger'n you, 10. Old he-did he holls
much?'' And the squire unconsuiously
loosened his hold on JOS coat. well,
sir, | reckon you can go now and pick
up some chips. But look here, young
man, never let me hear of you fighting
| any more, or I'll wear you out! Do you
/ hear me?'
PA, no Joe didn' whoop him" ut was
the 'squires other boy.) Il seed it all =;
and that Crump boy everlastingly went fur
Joe, I tell you!''
''J-o-s-e-p-h, come back here! Now,
how was it, Willy?"
That Crump boy jus got Joe down,
and got on top of him and chugged and
chugged him until Joe holIaed ouch and
said he'd give up-and that's just how it
was. too.'
The old gentleman again gathered Jo-
seph and this time the hickory descended
| hot and fast.
Licked again, huh! Licked again!
And you a son O. mine. Licked by a
Crunp. Amt you ashamed of yourself?
Mex time you get to fghtin' you hit the
first ick-d'ye hear me? and hit it right
under the gills-understand, sir? or plant
it in the short ribs or under the chin. and
never let me hear of you squallin' owch
any more, an disgracin' your old daddy
that way. Whooped Oh, pou! Whooped
by Crumpi Ugh!'
| Kerrwhack. ker-! IL!