Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1890-09-26
THE COLONEL'S FEE.
He Earned Under Conditions Peculiar
Even for q Lawyer. 6,se+

EttG SSSSiNS@ - - -S'
He Earned Under Conditions Peculiar
Even for . Lawyer. saf,
There lives in one Of the finest coun-
ties of kentucky an aristocratic old gem
tleman, who, though brave at time OF
physical trouble, has never succeeded in
summoning sufficient courage to shove
him into tho rscklessness Of paying a
debt. Like most men that are loose In
money matters, he is OF exceedingly
cheerful disposi tion, and has been known
to invite bill collector into the room
which he termed "the holy Of holies, p"
derived from the fact that the Colonel
kept his liquors there), and regale him
with bourbon that had attained great
age. But he would not pay the bill.
Once the Colonel was in debt to a
grocer that lived in neighboring vii
lage. He must have been newcomer,
for none Of the "old-timers" would trust
the old gentleman. One morning, just
after the Colonel had taken his third
julep and sat down on the gallery tc
smoke, the grocer came to the gate and
shouted, ''halloar
"Get down and come right in, sub !,
the Colonel called, getting Nn .,S' "a eor
daily advancing to pagtftth asggt the y visitor.
~l4 s@e @eSelighted to see you this brigh
morning." said the host when he hac
shown the grocer into the house.
"You don't know me, reckon" tn
grocer responded, giving the old man
peculiar look out Of his keen eyes O
trade.
80, most assuredly. You are tn
grocer"
"You bet. Did you get that bill-or
rather, them twenty bills-I sent you?
'I'presume so, but can not say posi-
lively who sent them. / get so man
favors Of the kind that hardly knoN
whence they come. Let us 60 into tn
holy of holes"
"No, reckon not. / have hearn c
that Ticker room an about you gittir
folks drunk that 60 in thar, but Nv
| bOfOI hCdlh VlidU q lhdh Whdu olu RO /
thar ever got the money comm to hin
Pm man of business an want m
money without any palarverin.' Do 20
understand"
Perfectly, sub, and l can not blam
you. Business can not be operated will
out money"
"But are you goin' to pay me?"
81 can't pay you now"
when can your"
Lets see; this is the tenth of th
month, amt it?"
"That's what it is"
"Ah, ha, and tomorrow will be tt
eleventh"
"Thats the size Of it."
"Well, you come round between Il
eleventh and the first of next month
"Will you pay me then?"
"No, don't think shall"
''Then what's the use of my comm
; None that / can see. Didn't kno
, but you might be more willing to
, into the holy of holies by that time"
> mot much. What l want is n
| money, and I'm goin' to have it or knc
a the reason why"
| 81 don't mind giving you the reaso
/. The reason appears to be that you'll n
Q get the money. Now look here: ha'
4 always made it point to look wi
a favor on the methods of life establish
A by other men. You have your rul
q and l have mine, but because our rul
= differ it is no reason for us to fall OF
4 One of your rules is to collect eve
a cent due you. All right. One of I
n rules is not to pay cent. All righ
mo, it's not all right-you bet yo
life it amt You've simply got to po
i up" .
IS "No, thank you. By the way, h
II much do l owe you?"
n "Ten dollars"
a "a beggarly sum-" .....
J. "Why don't you pay it, then?"
II Because don't pay beggarly sum
= You'll pay this one"
y POSSIBLY. BY the way again, let
;, give you piece of advice with regs
~ a to that bill. Shall I?'
!, "Yes."
"Well, then, sue me-"
q "Tll do it; you bet your life on tina
7 The grocer brought suit The Colo
q. promptly appeared. The case went
trial and the grocer got judgment
n seven dollars.
or m 81 want my money now," said
4 grocer
+ "And l want NINE" the Colonel
piled. ..... ......
"Yours: I don't owe you any thin
L. 30, yes. You see," the old n
ty added, "the courts many years
tn granted me license as lawyer, and
lg be hanged if you haven't given me
er first case. Here is the license"
TX "Why, haven't given you case.
es 80, yes; advised you to sue me
TO you did so. My fee is ten dollars"
"Mr. Billings" said the judge land
ps p, also owed the grocer, "you will h
~ to pay the amount"
III He did so, closed his store, shot
pc judges COW and ran away.-Arkan
"a Traveller.
a Two Points OF View,
- .Stranger-If man falls down an o