The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1890-10-30
PumoENT PARAGRAPHS.


You can't eat enough in week TO
last you a year, and you can't advertise
on that plan either.
The man who keeps still when he
hasn't any thing to say is public bene'
factor.-Somerville Journal.
The only time the average woman
Aever talks back is when she accept.
sour seat in street-car.-Puck.
If one has cold and doesn't know
what to do for it, all his friends can tell
aim; but that does not affect the cold.
-'Tm going off on my own hook,T
aid Trouty to his mamma. But he
.ound out too late that the hook be-
ionged to the man at the other end Of
the ine.-Harper's Bazaar.
eve are all interested in the com.
ing woman" says an exchange. Not
half so much, though, as we are in the
woman who has already come. Boston
Gazette.
That man who hasn't any work to
do never seems to be quite happy unless
ne is bothering somebody else who has.
-Somerville Journal
Sunday school Iteacher-"Now, little
boys, whatdo you know about Goliath?"
Freddy Fangle-''Please, ma'am, he was
rocked to sleep. Figaro.
-Winkers-"I haven't seen you at
the club for a week. You seem to have
become a great home body lately"
Blinkers-"Yes. Wife's away."-N. Y.
Weekly.
She (enthusiastically)-"0, Georgel
Ion't you think the greatest Joy in life
is the pursuit of the good, the true and
the beautiful?" He-"You bet! That's
why Pm here tonight t"-Burlingt
Free Press.
-'Did your husband leave will?"
asked thelawyer of the weeping widow
for-the-second-time. 81 don't think he
could. / know he never had any as long
as I've been married to him. "-Phila-
delphia Times.
Might have been expected.
son-''Poor Mrs. Tufstake! Doyou know
how she happened to lose all ermoney?"
Dumpsey-''Y she took three lawyers
in to board Huntington Free Press.
-Fannie-''Papa, Mr.. Havmuch has
asked me to marry him" Papa-"And,
my child, doyou think you love him"
Fannie (astonished) )-"Love him, papal
Why, he's worth million dollars!'-N.
Y. World.
-Prisoner-'sI don't think there will
be any need of your addressing the jury. !"
Lawyer-'Why not?" Prisoner-'fMy
insanity will be Instantly plain to them
when they see that have retained you
to conduct my case. Puck.
First Resorter-s'That mosquito Just
came up and presented its bill to me as
cool as could be. never had anything
sting me So" Second Resorter-"T That's
nothing. Wait till the landlord does
the same thing. America.
CHARLES and George have both pro-
posed to me. | don't know which to
take" SIS George rich?' ''No He has
81, 800 year." ''How much does he
spend?" ''s1, 400" "How much has
Charles?'' 1910, 900 year" "How much
does he spend?" ''S12, ,OOO." 'Take
George. ."-Harper's Bazar.
-Mabel-"Papa, how do you suppose
we can play tennis in that yard?" Papa
-"Why, my love, I've had the grounds
beautifully laid out for you." Mabel
Yes, but there's a high fence around,
it. How is any one going to see our ten
mis- suits in place like that?"-America.
-Irate Patron ''You advertise to
cure consumption, don't you?" Doctor
Quack-"Yes, sir. l never fail when
my instructions are followed" Irate
Patron-'My son took your medicine
for year and died an hour after the
last dose" Doctor Quack-"My instruc-
tions were not followed. told him to
take it two years IN. Y. Weekly.
Home for Womenr Future.