The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1890-05-17
HuMORO s DRlF W0OD.
"a grain Of common sense NAV be Of
more. value than q scruple Of console


/ "a grain OF common sense NAV be 81
more value than scruple Of conscience.
Many man 50 IS he would die for 8
woman just because he thinks he knows
she wouldn't want him to.
"A man is like a chicken; he will leave
8 plate OF meat to run after another
chicken with bone in its mouth.
I am man OF peace; God knows how
1 love peace; but hope Ill never be
such coward as TO mistake oppression
for peace.
| Popularity ia like the brightness of a
fallen star, the deetlng splendor Of a
rainbow, the bubble that is sure to burst
by its very imitation.
'.Do you call this tough composition
you have given me liver, Mrs. Boxerl'
IT call that liver yes. Mr.. Slowpay.' u
"Well, l think l must haye got a
piece OF the pad"
Before an af1iction is digssted, con-
ISOLATION ever comes too soon; and after
it is digested it comes too late; there Is
but one mark between these, az fine
almost as q hair, for q comforter to take
ann at.
Compliments, which we think are de-
served. we accept only as debts, with
indifference; but those which conscience
| informs US we do not merit. we receive
with the Same gratitude that We do
do favors given away.
There is something exqnisitely cool
in the following rerlv Of a Yankee to q
European traveller when the traveller
asked If he had just crossed the Alps:
"WaN, now YOU call my attention to
the fact. I guess l did pass risin'
ground
He who complains that the world ia
hollow and heartless, uncons ciousIy
confesses his own lack Of sympathy,
while he who believes chat people as a
whole are kindly and human Is certailt
to have the milk Of human kindness in
his own nature.
The fruits are often gathered long
time after the sowing and planting; the
man who looks for them too ,or ls IN
reasonable. and makes himself uncom-
Portable. II We only know they are sure
and will come in their proper season,
we should be satisfied.
| When Alexander was asked how he
had conquered tho world, he replied:
''Bv not delaying" A good suggestion
for any practical worker in the world.
1t is from the habit OF putting OF, that
50 MANY good things that are thought
Of, are left undone.
1t is great thing for any one to Oil
his place in the world. 1t matters less
where ones place il than that it be
n|]ed wherever it is. The lowest place
well filled 10 more creditable TO b,m who
occupies it than would be che highest
poorly filled. And, indeed, no place in
the world can be so high or good as the
one to which God assigns one.
| Our sitter, life IL largely nodded bv
our bringing up. But our training is
not to be offered as an excuse for our
conscious wrong-doing. II know 1t
isn't right, but that's the wav was
brought up says one. But ''let me not
QUAR- Ell with my up bringing" says
Carl vie. Let us not seek a refuge from
blame in: the defective work OF our
parents. What We are. we are. Good
or evil, what we do. let US do.
what lot Of bright ideas YOU
havel'' exclaimed the young wife. ad'
mirinRly, to her husband.
"But haven't SUCH bright eyes. dear
az vou!" exclaimed the young husband
| to his wife.
| And then the family cat got no, dis.
gusted. from her warm resting place bv
the sitting room stove. and walked
soleunly and slowly out into the open
air.
"Do you know. George. wish you
would stay at homo tomorrow"
"Whv. darllngP"
',Oh, because this afternoon a terrible
! HOOKING tramn cana here while you were
away. and ordered me- to give him snn,e'
thing to eat, 80 had to give him all the
sponge cake made last Saturday, and.
George. he says he's coming back to-
morrow"
ibid ha eat the cake. darllnap"
ayes. ali OF it everv hit.''
"W~l1. then, set vnur mind at rest
dear; he will never come back"
| s.Johnl John! Wake npl''
"Wbat Is the matter. Mariap"
II hear q noise in ire kitchen. &c
down quick and see what it Is. Maybe
Its a burglar"
MRS Billns. what do you cnnside,
the actuai cash value Of the silver and
plated ware and other stealab!e articles
l IN tho kitchen9N