The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-07-28
HEWOULDPLAYCR OQUET
,,uuRCH MEMBERS OBJECT AND
THEIR PASTOR RESIGNS.

antsd Himself From Prayer
s,oo+i,o to Play the Pernicious
cone-ae says He Was Only Talk
about CtHcago-An Editor the
Accuser.
From the Chicago Tribune.
r.,ropo1Is. Ill, July 23.-Brethren
- dwell together in unity. But then
can the brethren dwell together in
..o;tv if the parson plays croquetl As Mr..
ITJuin Booth says very pertinently, that
- ouestion." 1t is this question that
- ] A. Bozarth is discussing with a
- and tluembarrassed mind. He is giving
- ,vhole time to it. He used to work on
tarro but. of course, ne had to give that
Now he sits in the woodshed and pom
sars this question prayerfully and thought
fnIlv while his wife weaves rag carpets for
a living.
Now and again Farmer Garvey comes
into the village and looks up ex-Farmer
Rozarth They sit on the saw-buck and
nbavv tobacco and discuss the question.
And it is q question worthy of this i'm
nortant consideration.
Revision of the Westminster creed fades
into pallid insignifcance; the debate on H.
FAINT damnation takes a back seat; Father
NcCIlynu is out of it; the horse-racing par
son is back number.
How can the brethren dwell together in
unity if the parson plays croquet. This
question sticks to the Christian Church of
GIIiopolis like bur to a mules tale.
But facts. as Mr.. Graagrind remarked in
his nleasant way. The church of Illiop-
oils IA weird, CHASTITY bit of word-making is
this same name Illiopolis)-well, the church
is a white. wooden, abrupt building, square
and with wart-like tower.
Nine months ago the Rev. R. e Howells
came from Nebraska to administer the
bread Of the word to the congregation Of
this church. He was a clean-shaven, Henry
Dixey-looking young man; athletic, pretty,
with notions distinctively progressive, and
with ways that were pleasant and social
Moving as he did in the elite of Illlopolis
society, it was natural that he should appear
at the recherche receptions in Brother
Dakes front yard.
Right here one stubs mental zoe on the
nub Of the story.
The Rev. Mr.. Howells was postmaster of
the science of knocking wooden balls under
iron wires. At this he was an eminent
success Sister Mary Ticknor admitted as
much. She is slight and lively widow,
with dark hair and an age that is reasona-
bly, certain. 1t goes without saying that
she was a social belle, rung up every time
at these gatherings of the haut ton.
Every one loved this "Adonis" parson
until he began to play the fascinating and
aristocratic game too, too well. He beat
pounds q week chasing his ball about the
village limits when the parson had got
through with it, after deadly crack with
his long-headed Hgnum-vite mallet Now,
Editor Spencer had been something OF a
figure in the social world himself He was
not very tall, but he made up SO much in
width that one might. call him a fine
proportioned man. There was a place on
his head where silky black hair used to
grow, and he wore a large and beautiful
black moustache, through which his teeth
cleaned with white and icy radiance. His
eyes were trimmed with red circles, but these
added distinction to his appearance. Few
people have them. Then, as Landlord
Shrewsbury Of the Shrewsbury hotel re-
marked: People says as how he got them
red eyes by overwork in the litt'ry busi-
ness.n
The iron of the parsons success entered
into the editorial heart aud ranked there
Mr.. Spencer put his hand upon this rankle
and swore vengeance He challenged the
parson to game of croquet.
1t came off. Again the plump little edi-
tor chased his ball about the town limits,
while the parsons long-headed mallet got in
its fateful work.
The parson should have lost that game.
Don't you believe it,
Ask his gray-haired mother or the
comely pretty wife who nurses his athletic
youngster Troublous times for the little
manse among the roses.
Editor Spencer is not a church member
and yet there are three churches in Illiopolis
-to-wit; the M. E. church, the Church of
the Christian brotherhood, and the Cath
olc church. Landlord Shrewsbury. who
has delightful humor, says that Mr..
Spencer's physical proportions prevent him
from walking in any straight and marrow
path. A merry conceit and withal a pretty
one.
But Mr.. Spencer knows his dury and does
1t like man. He expo 7tulated with Par
son Howels on the sinfulness of PLAYING
croquet. Parson Howells laughed a good
natured laugh. The editor went away sor-
rowful.
Sorrowful, but with fine and noble de-
termination to fight the world, the flesh.
the devil, the parson, and crouuet.
lie and ex-Farmer Bozarta aud Farmer
harvey sat out in the woodshed and talked
ltoVer. Mrs. Bozarth staid indoors and
"oVe rag carpet The three eminent citi-
zens decided that croqlet was pernicious
and sinful-in parson; that it cloudeJ his
!neeillgence; cast torpor over his con
science; Stulttted his moral sensibilities.
That was Wednesday, Mr.. Howells' wife
was In Eureka with the jolly lump of a
paoy and the good mother. That is the old
hotne-Mr. Howells is a graduate of Eureka
college. so the parsonage was closed nm
Inc parson had been staying at the house of
brother Dake. Said Brother Dake returned
that day from Chicago.
ihey sat on the lawn--these two-and
talked about Chicago and Then suggested a
game of croquet
IT III Is Wednesday night" said Parson
ing" - 0y "a iiiee'-
,, put you are not the leaderY"
No; but always like to be there
30 do !, 4" said Brother Dake,
but about Chicago"
"Chicago"
lnen Brother Dake began to talk again
anu that prayer-meetil drifted into the
N"lgKelt as far as Parson Howells was
uonoerned. They sat and talked about the
~onuertul city on the lake until the early
I nai paled their Intellectual fires and Mrs
i DaEe put her head out of the window and
eald: - -" A
Then they Vent to bed
l.. "a they play croquet! A practice on ma
tbo Iue atternoon-nothing more. So saws
We parson. Corroborated by S. Dakes
b; ven, Brother W. f. Correll, who owns
~ H,s Iarm aud town mouse as well. believes
TT1ien 50 does his brother, u. s. CorrelI
~ - mere is Reuben Smith, the wealthy