The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1890-06-26
NOW is THE TIME OF THE RIBBON
TIED ESSAY.
One who Went to College Recalls Some
Funny Incidents of the Day-A Proposal
of Marriage Made Publicly


Funny Incidents of the Day-A Proposal
of Marriage Made Publicly.
If all the commencement day essays
which will be read in American schools
and colleges this June were gathered into
book form the result would be a series of
volumes as numerous and closely printed
as those comprised in the Encyclopedia
Britannica And, however much you
may scoff at the statement there would
be much in those volumes worth the
reading-much original, sensible thought,
many examples of splendid composition
and perfect English.
Speaking of commencement day recalls
an incident which occurred at one of the
New York State colleges few years ago.
Among the graduates was young
mani think his name was Dessoit-who
was one of those combinations of bash
fulness and wit which are known so sell
dom; and the faculty had consented that
instead of preparing conventional essay
he should write semi humorous record
of the work of his class during their four
years of college life. A peculiarity of
Dessoits shyness was that it only ap
peared when he encountered strangers
lie was always the best speaker at class
dinners; he "knew no fear'' when talk
ing to people with whom he had even a
slight acquaintance, no matter how large
the gathering, and among his many
friends his witty little speeches were Of
ten heard. But let one wholly unknown
face appear among his listeners and Des-
soit's tongue thickened, his cheeks
| flushed and his wit fled.
OF course he knew that there would
be many people whom he had never seen
among the commencement day specta
tors, and he trembled accordingly.
Weeks in advance he began schooling
himself for the event, but he could not
overcome his bashfulness. When the
great morning dawned he was terribly
frightened. His agitation was really dis
tressing, and if he had begged off,
giving sickness as his excuse, his appear
ance would have justified the claim
But he had made up his mind to do or
die, and of the two he considered doing
preferable, His name was among the
first on the programme, and as he waited
for the signal to go on the platform he
fairly qulvered with painful excitement.
At last it came, and, wonder of wonders,
with it came instant and absolute free
dom from embarrassment. Calm, self
possessed, his agitation wholly gone, he
stepped forward, inclined his head to-
ward the audience, and began. He said
afterward that he never felt more certain
that his manner was easy, his smile nat
ural, his gestures graceful, than at that
moment.
When he reached one of his good
points he threw back his head, and his
eyes twinzled merrily as the audience
showed it's appreciation by deafening ap-
plause. He had gone on for perhaps five
minutes, and the audience was convulsed
with laughter when the president of the
college stepped up and put his hand ON
Dessoits shoulder. His face was black
with rage as he said in tones which must
have been distinctly audible in all parts
of the hall: "Mr. Dessoit, leave the
stage at Oncer'
Dessoit was dumfoundcd. The presi- |
dent had read and approved his Grafton
only the night before, and that he should |
command him to retire before he had |
half finished delivering twas outrageous.
Boiling with anger, he did as he was
told. Within two minutes he learned |
what had been the trouble. He had not
made an audible sound while ON the |
stage. He had stood there opening and |
shutting his mouth, gesticulating, put |
ting on the most delightful of facial eX-
The spectators had expected something |
funny from Dcssoit, and when he began
to go through his silent imitation of a |
speaker they were immensely pleased |
The president was surprised beyond |
measure. He thought that Dessoit was |
trying to make game of the occasion.
Fully tWenty-four hours passed before |
Dessoit was thoroughly convinced that
he had not spoken-he said he had felt
the words pass his lips. Butoverwhelm- |
ing evidence proved that he was wrong. |
The president never thoroughly believed
that Dessoit had really thought he was
talking.
At another college, where both sexes
are received, an equally ludicrous Incl
dent occurred on commencement day. |
One of the young men students who, like |
Dessoit, was very bashful, had fallen vio- |
leptly in love with one of the prcttiest of
the 'cO-eds.m The night before com
mencement day this young man was
called upon by one of the professors to
help return the essays, which had been |
handed in by the students for final eX-
animation, to their owners. While the |
young man was at work he ran across
the essay written by the girl of his heart. |
He had been unable to muster up suff
cient courage to declare his love, and as
on the morrow he would leave on rail |
road train in one direction, while the
pretty 'co-ed" went in another, expedi-
ton was desirable. Between the differ
ent divisions of her essay the girl had
left blank sheets of paper, the whole be-
ing bound together with ribbons at the
top, of course.
When the young man saw these blank
~. l., 80,
Hastily seizing pen he wrote on one of
them declaration of his overpowering
affection, and ended by asking the
''oo-ed'' to marry him. He enaturally sup
posed that she would go through her cs-
say to see what markings had been made
before the exercises, and thus see his
note. But he was mistaken. For some
reason or other she didn't do it.
When she stepped on the stage,
radiantly beautiful in white, he noticed
at once that she wore the roses which he
had sent her in her cOrsage. He took
this for an affirmative reply to his note,
and was mad with joy. Her essay was
an argument in favor of the independence
of woman, and in it she gave everybody
who was unfortunate enough to be a
mere man round roasting Her voice
went out into the hall firmly and distinct
| ly. She had finished the first argument
lie was full of bliss. Without looking at
her manuscript, butgazing calm and self
possessed at the audience, she turned a
page. She paused for an instant before
proceeding.
Then she glanced downward, started,
flushed and read in surprised but very
audible tone:
'DEAREsT MATTIE:-I love you-pas-
sionately, devoutedly. viii you be my
wife? HENRY HANKER."
For a moment she hesitated. Then
the enormity of the thing seemed to fall
on her with crushing force, and she fled
from the stage.
1t was long time before he was able
10 explain things satisfactorily, but the
fact that the pretty coed is now Mrs.
Henry Hanker is reasonably good evil
dence that matters were finally arranged.
N. Y. Press.
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