davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12
Getting it through his head.-Lite
Choosing a Profession.

Chosing u Profession.
Loiterer lat railway station)-Why
does that boy set up a yell every time a
locomotive whistle blows?
Small Boy-ne's tryin' ter see if he's
got voice enough to drown tn noise Of
tn engine.
Loiterer-What for?
Small Boyle wants ter find out if
he's adapted for selling papers. -Ne,c
York Weekly.
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12
A Natural Conclusion.

Small Susie-Aunt Kate, isn't Miss
Locutte real poor?
Aunt Kate Gracious, child !no. What
makes you think SO?
S. S.-'Cause, at our party last night
I looked at her, and there wasn't enough
OF her dress to cover her shoulders, and
there was big wide rip down the back.
--Pittsburgh Bulletin.
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12
An Accommodating b

City Dame lin the country
can't you get me some cat tails?
Country Boy-Yes'm. Long ones.
City Dame-Oh. long or short, which,
ever are the prettier. ~.
Boy-Well, mum, guess I'd betse.
bring you in TIL cats an let you cut tne
tails off to suit y'rself.-StTees ana
Smiths Good Nous.
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12

Mr.. Poeticus (enteripg cheerfully)-
Ny lose=is like the red, red rose!
Mrs. Pcet;N.-s. y IS ~ ,@aAroW the
stove)-You'd look red, too, you lazy
scribbler, if you'd been bending over a
frying pan for twenty minutes!
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12
Tho Original Statement

Adam-Come on, Eve; the flaming
sword is right behind us. =
Eve-Really, l can't this evening,
Adam. my dear, I-I-haven't any
thing to wear. Boo-hoo, (weepsD-
Springfield Jester.
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12
Something of M.

she-Isn,t DR.. Anderson very alb
sent-minded?
He-Yes. That's why he never mar.
ried. He went to kiss his sweetheart's
hand once and vaccinated her instead.
--LudQe.
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12
A Bad Woman.

"Now, the best thing you can do"
said the Judge to an old negro who had
applied for divorce, is to go home
and behave yourself"
"Yas, sah."
Il do not see why you should not get
along all right"
"Yas, sah."
1--WE all have to make sacrifices"
"Yas, sah, so I heah 'em say, but
mighty few men hasser put up wild such
Ell wife ez rs got. 1 ken stan de COM
mon run O. wim,nen, but dat puson,
jedge, is rank pizen. Wy, sab, if she
wuz er sleep an wus:er dream dat wuz
enjoyin' myself, she'd wake herself up
an see dat de enjoyment wuz stopped
right dar. She likes ter died some
time ergo. Wuz mighty in hopes dat I
wuz gwine ter lose her, but when she
found dat I WIZ pleased, blame eff she
didn't turn ober an git we'll. She's q
bad oman, sab. Trav-
eler.
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12

First Little Boy-My pas Freewill
Baptist; what's yours?
Second Little Boy-Mine says he's q
Free Thinker, but I doubt it.
why so?"
II know it because he has to think
about as ma says. Mas boss in our
house. "-Teras SJtings.
Same Dog Bit Ne.
Two colored brethren we're holding o
little religious convention between
themselves. Said Elder Jefferson:
Now, Bruder Jones, jist what am
yoaa besettin' sin?
well, elder, if must confess /
reckon my settin' sin am Tub for de fe-
male sect"
"Ah, oh, ah!"
what for you larf SO, Mars JEFF
ferson?"
"Well, jist dis, Bruder Jones. same
dog bit me-"
"Is dat so?"
"Yas, for shuar."
They shook hands and the conven-
ton adjourned.-Chicago Herald.
Younglove Kccons,dered
"By Jove," exclaimed Younglove,
hastily tearing open al envelope he had
just sealed, 81 came near putting my
foot in it that time"
whats the matter?" inquired
Thompson.
"Why, I was just about sending a
letter to my best girl, proposing mar
riage."
@Well. what's wrong about that"
"Penal otfense; marriage is lottery,
you know, and Wanamaker might find
me out. Guess I'll telegraph Ea-
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12
Tlle limo Not Ripe.

Anxious Patron-Doctor, don't YOU
think you'd better call in some other
physicians for consultation?
Family Doctor {cheerfully)-Oh, no,
not yet. There is still some hopes
NeW York IHeeklu.
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12
LAUGH AND GROW FAT.
A HEALTHY TONIC FOR n
vALlDs OF ALL KINDS.

Humorous Anecdotes G,oancd from vari-
GUS Notwithstanding to Road which
Will Make Any body Sleep wcll-Better
Than Medicine Whom Taken before Re-
firing.
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12

HUNGRY Little Ragamuffln-Please
gimme ginger snap? Pompous Baker
"a pharisee)--No. sir; never give q
snap away. Boston Post
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12

Jeremlas. Iompklns, farmer, APP
p led IT, tho magistrate for advice.
Magistrn.e-Well?
Applicant cane up from Lincoln
y q at% and in the evening dropped
Observation-Disclosures Hall?
Applicant-No; opposite. "The I'll
Volt" think.
Magistrate-Proceed.
plicant-On leaving met lady
who inquired the time. / informed her
my watch would not go. She was a
very lady ike person, and told me her
father was Bishop! She said she
could make it go.
magistrate What did you do?
Applicant handed her my watch.
Magistrate-Audd did she keep her
promi q?
Applicant-Oh, yes. She made it
go-and she went with it.
Magistrate Qaughing)-Take sum-
mons.
Applicant should like to add, she
she was perfect lady.
Clerk to the Court-Quite so.-Pick-
Me- Tn.
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12
What Congress Does.

Johnnie-Mamma, do Congressman
work for living?
Mamma-Oh, yes, my child.
What do they do, mamma
Mamma-They meet on the first
Monday in every December, my son,
and begin OF once trying to adjourn some
time between the Fourth of July and
the 18th Of October.
Johnnie-Is it very hard work,
mamma?
Mamma-very difficult, indeed, my
son. Wdshinqto7a Star.
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12
MY.LADY WAITS.
BY CHARLES WASHINGTON COLEMAN.


Beneath the splendor the Southern sun
woman wits; dark chestnut Ia her hair.
And like a clean-cut cameo her face,
BY some rule artist wrought and dwelt upon
Till life breathed in the stone; and she Is fa1f
Like some slim lily in the garden place.
That in her heart my life should find place,
Tint she should wait for me at sot Of sun,
That she should name me -Love" boon
more fair
Life cannot give, than 1 should press the
hnir
Back from her low white brow, and gaze upon
The love-lit trunkness of her poor young face
Away from hor. and win the right to place
My life at her oumund, strike heal upon
All that is false. nor must to-day's spent sun
Know mo untrue may not touch her ho1r
Unless be rs true rs she Is fur.
She hsth not spoken aught, or cold or fair.
Nor havo asked. huve but read her race.
And watched the sunlight glinting on her hn1r,
And loved her. If for mo there be u place
In her pure h art. know not N the sun
May kiss what would lay my hand upon
1know not what may be, hut thus upon
My heart is put IL pledge for purpose fair,
Whatever else may chnnce. Beneath "a. sun
Men IRE but hu1n'.n SO this woman g face
Would keep mo strong and pure; then hatAy
place,
As doth the sun, my kiss upon her hair.
And this ltnow-my lady waits, her hair
Her lip, Against my heart my hand place
And pray that be true Us she is fur,
So HAT ut last may look i'll her face
Beneath the splendor OF the Southern SUM-
Oheart all doubts displace-the prize is far!
That may kiss he, hair, as doth the sun.
Strive bravely on, thy shield her pure Eon'';'
face.
-Lippincotfs magazine.
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12

One of the ladies murmured: II
that can't be it.
And the Judge, still smiling, repl :
Il told you that my explains .
wouldn't satisfy you.
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12
"Yes; most comfortable chair in the
world. Now, if I wish to recline at ease
all have to do is to press this little
button, and up She
sComes! life.
F,sarss whioh Mean Dollars.

Rattler-I hear Snapper is going to
marry Miss Smiler. She's nice girl,
aud has good figure.
Tsttler-Yes, good figure is neces-
sary in society marriage nowadays.
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12
Iscn,,;.i'ui Innocence.

Jeremiah. Tompkins, farmer, ap
pied t. the magistrate for advice.
Magistrnte-Well?
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12

do not see why you should not get
along all right.
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12

well. what's wrong about that"
"Penal otiense; marriage is lottery
you know, and Wanamaker might fine
me out. Guess I'll telegraph. Ea
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-12-12
Young,ovo Kccons,iered.

"Why, I was just about sending a
letter to my best girl, proposing mar
The silver state. [volume] (Unionville, Nev.) 1870-1903, 1890-06-24
peal Gently with the stomach

II il proves refractory, mild discipline is the
thing 10 set il right Not all the nauseous
draughts and bouses ever invented can do half
as much TO remedy its disorders as a few wine
glassfulIs, say three day-of Hostetter's Stom-
ach Bltters, which will afford it speedy relief and
eventually Danish every dyspeptic and bilious
symptom Sick headache, nervousness, sallow.
ness Of the compile xioa, fur upon the tongue, ver
tigo and those many indescribable and disagree
able sensations caused by indigestion, are too
often perpetuated by injudicious dosing. An
immediate abandonment of such rendom and i'll
advised experiments should be the first step in
the direction OF a cure; the next step the use of
this standard tonic Alternative, which has received
the highest medical sanction and won unprece-
dented popularity.
The silver state. [volume] (Unionville, Nev.) 1870-1903, 1890-06-24

Are you disturbed at night and broken of your
rest by q sick ohid suffering and crying with the
excrutiating pain of cutting teethi II 30, 20 at
once and get bottle Of MRS. WEsLow's SoolH-
me SYRUP II will relieve the poor little sufferer
Immediately. Depend upon it, mothers, there is
no mistake about it, IL cures dysentery and
diarrhBa, regulates the bowels, cures wind collie,
roftens the gums, reduces inflammation, and
gives tone ana energy tc the whole system.
Mrs. Winsows Syrup for children teething is
pleasant to the taste, and is the prescription OF
one on the Oldest and best female nurses and
phys iCians in the United States, and is for sale
5y all druggists throughout the world. Price IS
cents bottle n-1y-mv
The silver state. [volume] (Unionville, Nev.) 1870-1903, 1890-06-24

Wish to inform the public that we are ready to
make clothes to or ier and guarantee fit in all
respects or money refunded Just received a lot
Of Foreign and Domestic Samples of Spring aud
Summer Goods.
Also Agents for f. j. CLARK OF New York city,
REPAIRING A SPECIALLY. GIVE Us CALL
ie9-lS90.t
The silver state. [volume] (Unionville, Nev.) 1870-1903, 1890-06-24
CONVERTING HEAT INTO ELEC-
TRItICV
The Startling Discovery of a Young Man
From Maine.

For fifty years electricians have been
trying to discover a method OF converting
heat directly into electricity. Until re-
Gently no results OF commercial value
have been obtained. Such method
seems now to have been discovered, or
invented, by young man from Maine,
H. B. Cox II Mr.. Cox claims are just
and Hartford capitalists have conf
dence enough in them to have formed a
COMPANY with capital of 81, 200, 600
the whole system of power and lighting
will be revolutionizsd and steam will be
regarded as too expensive for ordinary
uses. 1t is impossible to estimate 10 ad-
vance the immense value of Mr.. Cox in
ventiou, bat it is certain that be expects
almost incredible results from it and that
he has inspired with his confidence some
of the shrewdest business men of Hart
ford and Boston.
The apparatus used for converting the
heat into electricity is so simple that the
company does not dignity it by the name
of machine. By Mr.. Cox method heat
is changed to electricity as simply as
water is changed to steam. His furnace
is all that may beseen. From glowingcosls
comes the subtle current, without the aid
of boiler. engine or dynamo. A jet of
gas can be made to run dental machine,
a sewing machine, or anything which re
quires no more power than these. No
power yet been discovered that is half so
cheap as will be electricity obtained by
this new process. This has been the
dresm-appsrently impossible of realiza-
tion-of all electricians, and even the
Wizard of Menlo Park has almost des-
paired of its ever being brought about.
Yet young man only twenty-eight years
| of age seems to have solved the puzzle
| problem. Hartford Courant.
The silver state. [volume] (Unionville, Nev.) 1870-1903, 1890-06-24
Inherited Scpofula.

Swift's Specific (S s. 81 cured my little
boy of hereditary scrofula, which broke out
all over his face. For year he had suffered,
and had given up all hopes of his recovery,
when at length decided to use S. s. s.. AZ
ter using few bottles he was entirely cured.
Not a symptom now remains of the disease.
This was three years ago.
MRS. L. l.. MATHERS, Mathersville, Miss
The silver state. [volume] (Unionville, Nev.) 1870-1903, 1890-06-24

In the early part of last year had a vio-
lent attack of rheumatism, from which
was confined to my bed for over three months
and at times was unable to turn myself in
bed, or even raise the cover. A nurse had to
be in constant atten dance day and night
was so feeble that what little nourshment
took had to be given me with spoon. At
ter calling in the best local physicians, and
trying all other medicines without receiving
any benefit, was induced by friends to try
Swifts Specific Is. S. 81 discontinued all
other medicines, and took course of s. S. s..
thirteen small bottles, which affected COM
plete and permanent cure.
l.. Z. BASSET, FL Dorado, Kansas.
Treatise on Blood and Skin Diseases mall
edfree. SWIFT SPECIFIC co. Atlanta, Ga.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1890-06-26
Taking the Hint.

The Chronicle suggests that we
would be rendering good service by
continuing some scheme by which the
Republican party may gain control in
the Board of Freeholders of the county.
This has already been done, brother,
Postmaster Laning, chief head Of the
Chronicle did it, when he learned that
the Board was Democratic and urged
that every Republican official
be turned out. This being the case, the
challenge f the Chronicle, in that line
was hardly eeded.
1t is accepted, however, and in due
time the Board will be Republican,
when there will be clean sweep all
along the ike.
You couldn't have coaxea that sly
old fox, of the Patriot, to urge the
Board to such course, or throw out
so silly challenge in a strong Repub.
lican county, as is Cumberland.
We are glad the Chronicle is render
ing the Republican party such efficient
erv'ce.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1890-06-26
Too True! Too True!!

mo paper can be published without
home patronage" says discriminat-
ing exchange, "and every man is in
terested in keeping up home paper.
If railroad or factory is wanted, the
newspapers are expected to work for
it. If a public meeting is wanted sor
any purpose, the paper is called OF for
a free notice. If the charitable saoie-
ties have a social or supper of any
kind, the newspaper is always expect
ed to give all the necessary notices ana
then puff it after it is over. The ews-
paper must puff the school and then
do everything else to advance the in-
terests of the business men of the
place, and then give them handsome
notice when they go to heaven. And
yet some of them do nothing to hecp
up q paper"
Bridgeton pioneer., 1890-06-26
ARE ANY MISSED?
Ii So, Report to the EnumeratOr.

Ii So, Report to the EnumeratOr.
Have the Census Enumerators missed
anyone in their inquiries?
1t is not unlikely if they have. In
some of the larger cities, some of
the press and others are making
great deal of excitement over
this fact, and claim the enumeration
has not been thorough. Such idle
complaints are silly. There are un-
doubtedly cases in this city and vicin-
ity which the enumerators have failed
to reach. There are others, perhaps,
who will endeavor to keep out of the
enumerators' way. and when the work
is completed, will be the first to call
attention to the fact that they have
been missed.
In many cities, there will be disap-
pointment. There may be some felt
here. Each city is anxious to show a
great increase. 1t is in the interest OF
the town to do so. But if the increase
is smaller than expected, do not blame
the enumerators, and make the ex,
travagant statement that they have
failed to do their duty. If you have
been missed, then report to the enum'
orator in your district. and have him
! report you.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1890-06-26
Lituell's Living Age.

The numbers of The Living Age for
the weeks ending June. 14th and 21st
contain 1.-THE Prussian Monarchy and
the Revolution of 1s4s, by Sir Rowland
Blennerhassett, Blackcood's Magazine;
''The Colonel's Boy" CornhiN; 1.-The
Comte de Clermont," Nineteenth Cen.
tatry: "Out on the Deeps," Temple Bar;
"a Quiet Corner of Normandy" Mar
rags Magazine: "A Girls Religion"
Longnam's Magazine; Maurice de
Sake" Temple Bar; Mountain Sheep
Gentleman's Magazine; ''The Cry of the
Parents" Macmillan; Insect Commun.
lists" National Revieec; Rathillet, Black
acood; Robert Browning" Quarterly,
CDR. John Covels Diary" Gsntlemon's
Magazine; "Poor Mrs. Darlington, !
Z empte Bar; Newfoundland and the
French Fishery Question" National
Reuie,c: 1.-The Gold Fever in Madagas.
car" Standard; and poetry.
For tifty-two numbers of sixty-four
large pages each Cor more than $500
pages Year, the subscription price
(SS) is low, while for $1050 the pub
fishers offer to send any one of the
American $4 90 monthles or weeklies
with The Liuing Age for year, both
postpaid. Littell & Co.. Boston, are
the publishers.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1890-06-26
NEW PROPRIETOR.
The Hotel Cumberland Changes
Hands.

Hands.
Upon the 2Sth of July next, the
Hotel Cumberland will have a new
proprietor in the person OF G. M. True
man, now of Lewisburg, Pa. Mr..
Trueman has been in this city upon
two occasions and likes the place i'm
mensely, and is well pleased with the
handsome hotel building. He left this
city June 18th, after purchasing from
the Stock Company, all of the furni-
ture in the building. After the pur-
chase, Mr.. Tice, the present proprie-
tor, was informed, and announced his
willingness to vacate, and allow the
new proprietor to take charge upon
the above date.
Mr.. Trueman is a young man OF
about thirty-f years, and has wife.
He has spent his life in the hotel busi-
ness and has had charge of some OF
the first class houses of the country.
He thinks that the Hotel Cumberland
has brilliant future before it, with
good management, and with the pur-
chase of the furniture, at considerable
outlay, he becomes interested to such
an extent that he will do his utmost to
make the house successful, sstts
Bridgeton pioneer., 1890-06-26
STATE POLITICAL MATTERS.
NeWsy Comments of New Jerseys
Public Men.

State Treasurer John J. Toffey has
gone to Chicago for week.
The Quartermaster General viii not
have his Office in the Governors house
at the Sea Girt Camp this year. He
will erect a row of Office tents near the
entrance. The Governor and staff
will keep bachelors hall in the old
house, and hang the latch string out
for all State officials.
Congressman McAdoo denies that he
is going to become resident of Vir-
ginia. He is still Jerseyman, and
several of his confidential friends have
already begun boon for his return
to Congress from Hudson County.
Ex-Sheriff N. w. G. Hays, who was
an unsuccessful candidate for the Bur-
lington postmastership, is out as can
didate for Sheriff in Burlington County.
Up to date only twenty-seven men
have been found who are seeking the
nomination for this Office. Ex-Sheriff
Edward Emley is among the number.
The report that Hon. H. s. Little.
the astute Monmouth County politi-
clan, is going to write book, is denied
by Mr.. Little.
The bill repeating the charter of the
West Jersey Game Protective Society
has not been filed, nor up to date has
it been signed by the Governor.
The Democrats of Hunterdon county
are going to meet in convention next
Saturday, to change the rules of the
party so as to conform with the pro-
visions of the ballot reform law.
An effort is now being made by the
Republicans in the State to raise
money to defray the expenses incurred
by the Senate Committee on Elections
in Hudson county.
Should the Democrats control the
Senate next year, they intend to un-
seat Senator A. F. Stuhr and reseat
ex-senator Mcdonald.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1890-06-26
CHINAMAN ROBBED.
Boys Steal Money From his Cash
Drawer.

Boys Steal Money From his Cash
Drawer.
The Chinaman, with the peculiar
name, who does business on Commerce
street, in the Fithian block, is the vic
tim of boy thieves. On Friday even
ing last, the Chinaman went out into
the yard in the rear of his establish
ment and while there he says three or
four boys entered the store, and pull
ling open the cash drawer in the coun-
ter, took from its interior about four
dollars in silver.
The Chinaman says he should know
the boys If he should see them again
and the police will make an effort to
bring the guilty ones to justice.
Tuesday a boy by the name of
Biddle, wicked little fellow, who has
often been before the Mayor, was
taken in charge by the police. He
was closely questioned by the Mayor,
and admitted that he was in the place
of business of the Chinaman on Fri
day last, although he said he was not
one of the guilty parties to stealing
the money. Other boys will be ar
rested sure, and it is to be hoped that
the right ones will be brought to
justice, and made to pay for their
deviltry. -
Bridgeton pioneer., 1890-06-26
Female Census EnumeratOrs.

There are three female census emu
merators in New Jersey, one in Mon
mouth County and two in Ocean.
Miss Alice Bunnell, who lives in Bay
vile, a pretty school teacher of
twenty-one, is taking the census of
Ocean county. This county was a
very hard one to cover. 1t comprises
a seashore front, and the district in
which the people live has mixed
population and many of the inhabi-
tants cannot tell where they were
born. Miss Bunnell has shown a
great deal of womanly spirit in her
undertaking, as many obstacles are
thrown in her way. David Noyes, of
Manchester Township, who is taking
the census of that district, gave out
under the strain. He resigned and
his wife, Mrs. Lavinia Noyes, applied
for the position and received the ap-
pointment. She is doing good work.
Monmouth county is being canvassed
very creditabiy by Miss Jennie Her
bert. She was recommen led as an
enumerator by Senator Nevius.