The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1890-12-27
PuNeENT PARAGRAPHS.

-Browu-"Can I sell you horsow
Bagnall-"What's the matter with
him?"-Brookly Life.
AN active foot ball season at the
colleges is shown by an equally ener.
! getic sale OF arnica in college towns.
II do like crying childrcnr'
| The bachelor said "And why"
friend asked, SHOULD you like tEissn"
They're sent out when they cry"
--In Spain the barber shears donksys
as wen as men. In America the barber
shears dudes as we'll as mon. st Jo-
seph News.
! AT twonty msu thinks he knows IL
all; at thirty he merely thinks he could
have known it all If ne had tried.-In-
dianapolis journal.
| In the market coffee is said to be
strong, and growing stronger. But it
isn't that way in the restaurants
vannah News
When Aian succeeds in saving
$4,000 he regards himself as rich man,
but after that he gets poorer all the
time. Globe.
-Incurable. Officer - t'He's pretty
wild, sir. Thinks he owns tn world"
Justice-"What's his business?" Officer
Hes been ianitor of downtown
| office-building. Judge.
--Husband-"For heavens sake, what
is the matter?" Wife tgroping desper-
ately under the bed)-'T have lost my
collar-button. ".-Binghamton Republi-
can.
Want of wholesome and adequate
food docks one-quarter one-third, or
one-half from the natural term OF the
industrial force for all those who come
to mans estate.
"A mans idea OF married happiness
is having wife who will devote all her
energies to secure his comfort. a wo-
mans idea of married happiness is hav-
ing a husband who will love her alone and
tell her of it once in while.-Somer-
vile journal.
-Rose-"Ah, you're ready for the
ball, are you? 1t makes me think OF
our schooldays to look at you. You
were always so clever at composition"
Maude-"Yes; but what reminds you of
it?" "You still make up so well."-St.
Joseph News.
Win mans friendship by telling
him to-day that he is the smartest one
in his family, and you will have to tell
him tomorrow that he is the smartest
man in town, and the next day that he
is the smartest man in the State.-Atch-
ison Globe.
Good for Both. -Peddler-"What's
that air bird in the cage, ma'am?"
Farmers wife-"That's bald eagle"
Peddler-"You don't say! Better try a
bottle of my hair-restorer, ma'am. It's
good for man or beast.-N. Y. Ledger.
Entitled to pass: President Y. NJ.
T. r. r. (haughtily)-"Who is this
James w. Bungstarter who wants a
pass?" Private Secretary-"Great cap
italist of heboygan-president of the
Knocash Natural Sand Bank-lessee of
the" President chastity ly)-"Send him
an annual. | thought he was some poor
devil who couldn't pay his way. ."-West
Shore.
1t is said that scientist somewhere,
after two years close practice, has got
so that he can exchange ideas with his
dog. And now if he will buckle down
for few years more and get on speak
ing terms with an old hen, SO that the
news may be carried to the hen-roost
whenever eggs are worth fifty cents q
dozen, he will be very apt to get monu-
ment with gilt letters on it.-Ram's
Horn.
First lady-"Come, let US go and
see the play tonight. It's a society
drama, and everybody says it's just
lovely" Second ditto: "Why not go
down to Tating e Biasfeld's opening of
Partisan costumes? Well see just as
much and more, and then, you know,
we don't have our attention distracted
by the conversation of actors, which SC
distracts from the effectiveness of the
drama" First lady: so, yes; that'll be
ever so much nicer than the theater.
Strange l didn't think of it myself
Boston Transcript.