Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1890-01-16
PAPA AND THE BOY,
An Early Morning Conversation In the Bed.
room of Pater EamiIias.

AN Larry morning Conversation In the Bed
room of Pater Families.
Charming as is the merry prattle of in
hocent childhood, it is not particularly
agreeable at about one o'clock in the
morning. when you are dead for Sleep
and wouldn't give copper to hear even
Gladstone himself talk. There are
young and talkative children. who have
no more regard for your feelings or for
the prophecies OF life than to open their
peppers with snap at one or two a. m,
and to seek to engage you in enlivening
dialogues of tais sort:
Papa
You think you will pay no heed to the
Imperative little voice. hoping that
silence on your part will keep the
youngster quiet; but again the boy of
three pipes out sharply:
Papa
''WelI?-' you say.
You wake, papa?''
''Yes"
''So's me-
''Yes, / hear that you are" you say
with cold sarcasm. What do you
want?"
'-Oh muffin"
We'll, lie still and go to sleep, then"
Il isn't s'eepy. papa"
well. | am. young man"
us you? l isn't-not bit. Say, pa
pa, papa?"
.'Wel?"
''If you was rich what would you buy
me?''
Il don't llnow-gO to sleep"
''Wouldn't you buy nuffin?"
Il guess So-now YOU"
what, papa?'
We'll 4 steam engine, may be; now,
rou go right TO sleep"
with bell that would ring, papa?'
Yes, yes: now you
And would the wheels go wound, pa
pae''
oh, yes Cyawning). Shut your eyes
now. and"
And would it go choo, choo, choo, pa
Yes, yes: now go to sleep.'
Say. papa"
No answer.
Papa
Well what nOw?'
is you 'faid of the dark?-'
No" (drowsily).
Il isn't either, papa"
Well?"
IF was wich, I'd buy you somefin."
would you?.'
Yes; Id buy you some ice cweam and
some chocolate drops, and a toof brush
and panties wiv bwaid on like mine, and
a candy wooster. and
That will do. You must go to sleep,
now
Silence for half a second; then
''Papa-papa.'
well. what now?'
Il want 4 jink.'
No. YOU DON'T
Il do, papa"
Experience has taught you that there
will be no peace until you have brought
the link. and you scurry out to the
bathroom in the dark for it, knocking
your shins against every thing in the
room as YOU go.
Now. | don't want to hear another
word from you tonight" you say, as he
gulpS down Il mouthful of the water he
didn't want Two minutes later he says:
Papa
''See here. laddie, papa will have to
punish you if
Il can spell dog papa"
We'll, nobody wants to hear you spell
at two O'Clock In the morning."
''B-o-g-dog; is that right?"
No, it isn't; but nobody cares if"
Then it's dog isn't it?''
Yes. yes; now you lie right down and
go to sleep instantly"
Then III be a good boy, won't 1, pa
pa?"
Yes. you'll be the best boy on earth.
Good night, dearie.''
Papa
We'll. well. What now?"
rs your little boy?'
YES, yes: of course"
Some mans haven't got any little
boys; but you have, haven't you?'
Yes"
Don't you wish you had two, free,
nine, 1eb"n, twenty-six, ninety-ten, free
hundred little boys?"
The mere possibility of such remote
and contingent calamity SO paralyzes
you, that you lie speechless for ten min
utes, during which you hear yawn or
two in the little bed by your side,a little
figure rolls over three or four times,
pair of heels fly into the air once or
twice. warm moist little hand reaches
out and touches your face to make sure
that you are there and the boy is asleep
with his heels where his head ought to