The Roanoke times. [volume] (Roanoke, Va.) 1890-1895, 1890-11-20
MISCELLANEOUS.

passed, seventy-three are credited to
France, and but five to the United
States
-Celetine-"Why didn't you take that
scat the gentleman offered you?" Earn
estlne-"Because l would have had to
BIT next to that woman whose ress
doesn't harmonic in color with mine"
domestic servants are so scarce in
Montreal that women in want of help
are said to visit the Jail with the view
OF engaging young women to work for
them at the close Of their terms Of i'm
prisonmcnt.
Jockey ''Can't ride to-day, Mr..
Petit" Petti["What's the matter?
Are you sick?" Jockey-"No. I'm not
sick; but I've got silver in my finger
and I'm afraid they'd make it out tn at
was overweight. Judge.
-Lady-"I would like to get serv-
ant-girl. The family consists Of my
husband, myself and five children"
Employment Agent = Every sorry,
madam, but you will have to kill of
some of the children"
-Manderville Virgins, OF New
Brighton, Staten Island, suggests drown
ing as humane form of capital punish
ment. He says he came near being
drowned not long ago himself. He went
far enough to discover that death by
that method would DO painless.
old gentleman (at his daughters
wcdding)-"My dear, don't sec how
am to got along without YOU" Bride
Never mind, pa. Since tho ceremony
was performed, my husband has con-
fessed that he hasn't enough saved to
go to housekeeping, so you may not lose
me after all."-N. Y. Weekly.
Eighteen words have como into the
language = probably temporarily. most
OF them = to denote the act or state of
electric killing. They are as follows:
Electromort, thanclectrize, thanatelec-
trize, thanatolectrisis, electrophon, cleo
tricise, clectrotony, elcctrophony, cleo
troctony, electroctasy, electricide, cleo
trop0nizo, electrothenesc. electrocd,
electrocution, fulmen, voltacuss and
| clectrostrike .-Garratt.
Don't clean your nails in public"
said critic to n Detroit Free Press re-
porter. 1T is unspeakably valgar. Tho
toilet should DO mado in the privacy Of
ones chamber, or, at any rate, out of
the public gaze. If there is anything
In the world that disgusts person it is
to see a fellow pull out o jackknife in q
street car and begin pairing away at his
hands. Don't do it, for it is vulgar to
tho highest.
| "A gentleman who wrote concerning
tho price of board in country town is
said to have received this telegram in
reply Board. $40 week, including
washing up the carriage and piano
agent Robinson" He wrote in an
swer that though both piano agent and
carriage needed cleaning, he was not
accustomed to such charges in board
Dill, and soon after learned that tho
original copy had run thus: Board,
$50 week, including washing, use of
carriage and piano. Agnes Robinson"
The annual product OF roofing slate
is given by Superintendent of the Cen
sus Porter as S2S, 800 squares, of value
of So, 1921, of which Pennsylvania
share is 474, 602 squares and 81, $50, 945.
or slate for other purposes the value is
given at $500, 5s2, Pennsylvania's part
being 1914, S31; total value of all slate
produced, 50, 444, S63; Pennsylvania, 81
O11,77G. = Pittsburgh Chroniclo-Telc-
graph.
The man who was hurrying into the
hatter's was on business. He wanted
his old hat. when did you leave it
here?" 81 dunno" was tho reply. They
hunted over great pyramid of hats and
found 1T, labeled July .. When no went
out the hattor said: ''That man bought
n new hat here and when no won't out
said that he would call for it in half an
hour. 1t has now been four weeks. Wo
throw away seven or eight hundred old
hats evory year for which the owners
| N hal
Lewiston Journal.
The London Hospital tells OF q
scamstress, who, like Hoods pathetic
heroine in the "Song of the Shirt"
worked till tho stars shone on the roof
Her eyesight failed and the story goes
on: "She saw at tho Same time four
hands. four needles and four seams
She at first treated them as an illusion.
but at the end of some days, in con-
sequence Of weakness and prolonged
mental anxiety, she imagined that she
was really sewing four seams at once,
and that God, touched by her misfor-
tune, had worked miracle in her
favor"
/ According to calculation mado by
tho Economists Beige, the cost of firing
o 110-pound gun is, in round numbers.
sS32, divided as follows: 900 pounds Of
powder. $3.50; 1850 pounds projectilc,
e435; silk for cartridge, SIT; total Ss32.
But this is not all. The 11O-pound gun,
1T appears, can be fired but 05 times,
and after that becomes incapable Of be-
ing used, and requires repairs. Now,
the cost OF the piece being So, 400, it is
necessary to estimate the cost of wear
at about 1865 for each shot, thus raising
the cost of each charge to S1,7OO
-Thoy struck town Tuesday, pictures