The Mason County journal. [volume] (Shelton, W.T.) 1886-1927, 1890-04-25
FAMOUS REPARTEES.
Great Men Whose Wit Formed Part G
Their Greatness.

Great Men Whose Wit Formed Part of
Their Greatness.
A friend of Socrates once babe him
give his nature full play and be himself.
"Oh! yes" replied the sage, land, when
ever | show my face out of doors, have
all the urchins of Athens at my heels,
shouting, 'Yonder goes the biggest
blackguard in Greece unhung!"
Apelles. the greatest of Greek paint
ers, used to hide himself behind his
pictures to hear what folks would say
of them in his absence. And, far from
despising the criticism of ''outsiders,"
he rather invited it; indeed, cordially
welcomed it so long as he felt sure that
they knew what they were talking
about. Thus, on one occasion, he gladly
accepted the structures of shoemaker,
who found fault with the painting of a
sandal in one of his pictures. But when
the man of leather began to criticise the
leg. Apelles promptly shut him up by
saying, ''Cobbler, stick to the shOe!''
1t is an open secret that the poet Pope
possessed but a smattering of Greek.
Hence, when he undertook to translate
the ''Iliad," he often found it useful to
consult the friends whom he was wont
to meet at his favorite haunt, Buttons
cOffee-hOuse. On one of these occasions,
however, certain passage proved more
than a match for all the assembled pun
dts While they were vainly cudgel-
ing their brains. young guardsman.
who happened to be present, ventured
to suggest that note of Interrogation.
judiciously supplied, would remove the
difficulty. Now every schuol-boy knows
that in Greek the note of Interrogation
is represented by semicolon. But
Pope, eager to show his knowledge of
that tongue. and at the same time to
take the shine out of the young officer
who had presumed to teach him his
trade. rashly assumed him to be ignor-
ant of that eleme ntary rule of punctua-
ton. So, thinking he had the guards
man fairly or the hip, the poet-who,
besides being Searfully deformed, stood
barely four feet six in his stockings
sneeringly inquired, "Pray, sir, are you
scholar enough to inform the company
what Greek note of Interrogation is?'
Eyes, SIR" said the son of Mars, with
frightful glance at Pope's puny and
misshapen figure: II am perfectly well
aware that tbs crooked little thing
which sometimes asks most impertinent
questions.
In one of Dryden's unequal dramas. in
which sense and nonsense seem contend
70, no or+a no -,
which wins, ranting lover is made to
exclaim, My wound is great because it
is SO small" Immediately on hearing
this bit of fustian, the witty duke of
Buckingham capped it with the strictly
logical and rhyming conclusion: "Then
twould be greater were 1t none at allr''
A nobleman. notorious for his un-
punctuality, having kept George ".
waiting for him for upwards of three
quarters of an hour, came busting into
the royal presence, exclaiming, with SIM
pering smile, "Ah, sire, better late than
never!' Nay" replied the king, 81
think the words of that proverb should
be transposed, "better never than later
At hotly contested election for the
borough of Cambridge, one of the mob
flung a rotten egg, which found-and
made its mark-in the face of Thomas
Darlington Macauley, then an under
graduate. Il humbly beg your pardon.
SIR" pleaded the offender. Didn't mean
to hit you. Aimed at someone elsev'
$50 be it, calmly replied the future
historian. ''Only, the next time you
throw shall be better pleased by your
aiming at me and hitting someone elser'
whats going on?" asked an intoler-
able bore, button-holing Theodore Hook
rs he met him in the street. Quoth the
celebrated wit shaking himself free, 81
mn and on he went.-Boys Own Paper.