davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-08-21
TT PAYS TO ADVERTISE.


IT PAYS TO ADVERTISE.
First Burglar-Well, you're bright
'un.
Second Burglar What's the matteri
"The paper says there was $500 an
money in the drawer you got that gold
watch from, an you missed it.n
"That 500 I'll go hack after it to-
night. n-[Epoch.
WOULD 1T REPAY Hn2
Bowles-Miss Alice, when leave you
in few minutes, may never see you
again, for / sail in an hour to Australia
You know how I have loved you, and
though you have not reciprocated tho
feeling, / hope you win think Of me
sometimes when I am grinding out
wearisome existence at the Antipodes.
Miss Alice (who has penchant for
jewelry)-I will endeavorto think you
sometimes; But, Mr.. Bowles, if you will
get me oneof those pretty gold necklaces
to.which lock is attached, will give
the key to your keeping. I will then be
unable to take the necklace off, and II
will be constant reminder Of you.--
Jewellers Circular.
GENEROSITY BEGINS AT HoMR.
No.r uo.u. nd.,;, raoha.
~ .io% a.:a.ss oa1 an az. J,
ne, .. nlnose9n'n os'.s p'.sa ;s ~ .; ..o sn
1;As 1;a,.,n,% noIsa. ..;. in'onu " si'o ,0'
Dashard Poore- II wish I were rich
enough to buy diamond ring.
I ..nH "a. r. n
Maud Linn-She'll take the will fol
the deed.
Dashard Poore--Yes, if were. rich
enough to buy diamond ring for Gwen'
dolin, "a buy apair OF shoes for myself
rNrrsrrp.
II understand you are engaged to Mis-.
Longs"
eyes; my first engagement.
"Your tirsts"
Eyes; Inever smelled powder before.
-[Binghamton Leader.
HE SPOKE TOO LATE.
He was a pastor of high repute; s
That shewas beauty none could dispute.
He loved her dearly, yet loved in vain,
For he dared NOT tellher his longing pain.
sbe asked his escort q mart of tbe wav ''
His heart beat high, and he almost
thought
He'd be able to plead for the love he
sought
9I've a favor to ask, y the maiden said,
AS she Diusned and drooped ner lovely
aT wish to know If vou,ll marry me
In church next TUESDAY ~ balf-nast
three.n
"That's just what wanted to ask, \ h.
said.
"And now we'll hasten each other Ia
n we'd"
"Ohl mo-" she cried, "that was lot my
pan :, !, 4.,,.,. -. ~.
---TNcw York Herald.
.....
p'oos hshD.
Burglar (soliioquizing) We'll, ! guess
that's alL ! can get here. /.
Waiter (talking IN his sleep)- Haven't
lExit burclar--sash and all l---(T,ife.
THE LOWERS KNOW IT.
The big girls who have little brothers
! Who aIways run and tall their mothers
Whate'er they hear and see, know wen
IN Hie US httie Ihlngs thab teH
'sas AS 4 80
TURNING THE TABLES,
po.+ : aor,+ - ,,,,,, ,,,,, ,,.,,. x.
cheek to charge $75 for that suit.
Tailor-My name is worth something
{ air MY IN NJ n \
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-08-21

A Refection-ThereFs q Reason for
Everything -cruel-well Named.
Etc. Etc.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-08-21

.isnsIy. and the private secretary sided
into the room.
You wanted to see ne, Mrs. ElIistonf-
he said, In his low, fauning voice.
Yes; I understand my husbnnd has
sent for you, and that you will be obliged
to start for Washington almost immed-
lately
1T is true. The Senator writes that he
can no longer do without me, and 50
am to JOIN him at the earliest possible
-And when viii the earliest possible
moment bs?"
T think I can get matters into order
here SC as to be able to leave in weeks
time.
$50 soonf Lshall ts vafy sorry to part
with you, slyme. / shall miss you very
much.
He raised his eyes Q little, and gave
her quick, searching glance.
But You, Mrs. Elliston, you will soon
Join your husband in Washington2"
yes. but not before the latter part d
May
-Ths last of Mayi 1 am sure he ex.
poets you before that"
i dare say, she reioined carelessly
-but can not leave New York for q month
yet.
A black look settled on the private SEQ.
retary's face, and in q somewhat different
voice he said:
Z am very sorry to hear it. But yor
did not call me here merely to say this
What information-what new service ds
you require of me before 90 away2-
eora paid no attention to his altered
looks and tone, but promptly replied:S
I'm the first place, Iwant to know abou
that girl at Roxbury. Is she being wei
cared for?"
Treated like queen"
-She still lives in the cottage you hired
for herr"
aNo, she is with the family of Mr.
Nathan Metcalf, the owner Of the cot.
tage."
Very agreeable, I assure ycu. Mr.. Net
calf is an elderly man, we'll infcrmed--il
fact, the oracle of the town. Then ther'
are his daughter and granddaughter, and
several servants.
-His daughter and granddaughter, 20,
say2"
is young widow, and, out of pure com
passion, acts as companion to Mrs. Cleve
land"
Mrs. Cleveland? thought that nam
had been dropped?"
True; in Roxbury sne is only know
as Mildred Lester.
-Lesterl Why did you give her her owl
maiden name?"
at was a risk, / admit; but there eva
no help for it. Mrs. Denton found tn
name on her linen, and besides, strangel
enough, she remembered that when sh
had forgotten all else.
"Butwill not the people around her fin,
out who she really is2"
Little fear of that, the people OF Ron
bury are not likely to run upon any on
from Riverside"
Il hope you are right. Has she quit
recovered from the effects of that fever?
In q way--yes.
What do you mean by that?"
Il mean that she is well--as well as sh
will ever be, and yet she is not what sh
was before that accident.
Il suppose you have reference to Il
mind. You have already mentioned tbs
her memoryhas become impaired; to wht
extent has she lost it?"
-She has lost all recollection of wins
happened before that fearful night. He
life, as I may say, dates from the HOT
when she recovered consciousness aftt
the fever"
STRANGE. but very fortunate"
aYes-for you.
Cora gave him aduick, searching glanc
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-08-21
4 wEIcoalR nunaLAn.

Buggs proprietor Of cross roads Jew
elry store) Hello therel Who's be-
low2
AVoice Below-A burglar; I am look
ing for your sterling silver
Buggs-Hold on; I'll be up in a min
ute and help you--[Jewelers' Circular.
IT PAYS TO ADVERTISE.
First Burglar-Well, you're q bright
'un. +
Second Burglar = What's the matteri
"The paper says there was $500 On
money in the drawer you got that gold
watch from, an you missed it,
"That 500 I'll 60 hack after it to-
night. .n-[ Epoch.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-08-21
his LATEST TITLE.

=. afl. : " .944 q +
.srll have q fit, I know I shalll''
shrieked a woman who was refusing to
be coaxed into the surf at Ocean Grove.
sNot in that suit you have on said
another woman next to her in such a
tone that she fell in heap, and it was
harder to get her out than it was to get
her in. Washington Star.
AMATTER OF PRINCIPLE.
Cumso- II don't like the idea Of send
ing exploring expeditions to the North
and South poles.
Fangle- Why notg
Cumso- Because am opposed to going
to extremes.
LATE RETURN FROM EVENING CHURCH..
"What kept you, my daughter, at service
so late2
Sweet Imogene's father said.
Whenever you go with young Repro
bate MI
You never get back to our garden gate
Till every ones gcAc to bed
1.-THE sermon was tedious, . his daughter
replied;
THE preacher was dull and grim.
Till the end Of the service We had to
bidc,
But the longest wait and sweet Imo-
gene sighed
.sNas caused by thcp parting him. I
+.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-08-21
v1nwrNa THE CASE PnorERLr.

VIEWING THE CASE PROPERLY.
Deaf Man Go musician) Mo, I'll not
give you anything. I'm deaf and can't
hear your music.
Friend (speaking into his trumpet)-
Well, give him dime out of thankful
ness because you can't hear him.
Epoch.
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-02-14
Properties of Ouicksand.

The properties of quicksand are thus
described in the Mechanical NeUs ::
The difference between building sand
and true quicksand is most easily ex-
planned by comparing building sand to
road metal, while the quicksand must
be represented by fragments no larger
than large buckshot, but shaped like
very smooth potatoes. In a word, the
quicksand is small and thoroughly
waterworn, so that every fragment has
been deprived OF all it's angles and
fairly we%ll-polished. It's particles are
very small as compared With those Of
the building sand. The smaller the
size and the more complete the round
ing the more nearly will the sand ap-
preach a liquid condition when it is
moistened. The first glance at a fairly
mounted sample Of quicksand under a
microscope is sufficient to show that the
quickness Of the sand is amply &C.
counted for by the innumerable fric-
ton wheels which the particles them
selves furnish. Sharp or building sand,
on the other hand, will show few round
corners, many angles, corners and a
general condition like that Of broken
stone. Sea sand is often unfit for
building, even though perfectly de-
prived of it's salt, the reason being that
the particles have been worn and pol
ished till they have no more binding
powers than SO many cobble-stones. It
is we'll to remember that quicksand
when dry, if very fine, shows the same
properties as a liquid. In holding up
the centers Of large bridges it is some
times put into cylinders with a plunger
on top of it. It will, when thus CON
fined, hold up the load like q column
Of water. When it is desired to strike
the center a plug is drawn out Of the
side of the cylinders, and the sand
flows out like SO much water. The adj
vantage, OF course, is hat the sand
does not need a packed piston, and
does not leak out, though the work be
prolonged for years. Quicksand when
dry and confined forms an admirable
foundation, and when wet can be load.
ed over it's whole surface, and give a
good support if side openings car be
avoided"
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-02-14

suffering the wrong you have suffered
kills, in a moment of mad anguish, the
man who stole his happiness and
robbed him of his wife's honor. But,
before you commit this rash act, ask
yourself if you have any grounds to
even suspect me? None, except that
1 am a stranger, and happened to meet
your wife when she vas a young and
innocent girl. And. as [ heard her
speak of you yesterday, and as 1 saw
her face beam with a happiness which
could not have been feigncd while tell
ing me of how much she loved you, 1
believe there is some terrible mistake
here-that your wife has either played
some joke on you, Or tlat this letter
was not meant"
stop, stranger! I believe We sir
inherent; but eff yer try ter preach
ter me erbout her, ! shall curse her
purity face. Oh, fool, that I cver
brought her ter SIGH Il lonely place as
this. But Issthought she meant it
when she said she'd be happy any
whares with me. God curse ther day
tibet 1 ever thought she could be happy
here, l wuz so happy 1 thought Of
none but myself. l see now she hain't
been ther same since 1 got her them
new dresses, an the books of city ways
an styles, an tibet fine lookin'-glass
thur. An ther little gal has changed
since ther papers L 'scribed fur came
all filled up with love, an grand ways
O liyin', an plenty O company fur
young wives. She war all alone.
/ know [ oughten ter expected she'd
like it, an it new oughter come tween
us, me bringin' her here. It's awful
rough, stranger, but 1 guess I'm ter
blame. Ny God! she mighter stayed
one day longer, an giy' me warmth, SO
s l could Ell drunk in enough O. ther
music O. her voice ter las me. an so s
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-02-14

I mighter bathed myself in the sun
shine o her bright eyes one mo- day.
But she's gone, as I mighter expected
eff I'd thought enough ov anything
'cept myself. An here's her note, as
slick an nice es emmy schoolmarm
coulder writ-but Their words seem
hard and cold ter me, an 1 feel like er
man thet's dying by inches'of Their bite
O a pisen %sarpent; but yet I can hear
the music O her voice IS if it WIZ sound
in ter me from away Off What's
tibet? Her voice? What's she sayin'?
Excuse her fur bein' so late, but she
stopped by Mrs. Quillin's, whose baby's
dyin'? Stop thar, gal! Whut Yer
comm back hear fur?"
Poor Jennie, who heard these words
as she started lightly up the steps,
with her lips pursed up for the usual
kiss, stopped as if petrifed at hearing
these words, and seeing her husband
with a gun in his hands. Before she
could reply, he had flung the paper al
her, and Missed:
"Heur, take yer note, an go with
! Their a who will treat yer better i
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-02-14

four o'clock in the afternoon, [ strolled
out in the woods with q book, about
noon, to enjoy 81 quiet repose under the
shade of the trees and the thlck-hang-
ing vines so common to that locality.
1t may have been Imagination, and
it may have been the spirit OF proph-
ecy, but I stopped reading to hear
the signing Of the great tall pine trees
as the zephyrs gently swept through
them. It seemed to be whispering to
them a story of sadness and tragedy.
As the soft voice Of the southwest
winds played upon the long needles of
the pines, L could hear them say,
"O-o-o-h, o-o-o-h! W-w-o-o-e-e, w-w-o-
o-e-e! S-s-s-o-o-r-r-row!"
I closed my book. the soughing,
mourning pines making me too SAD and
lonely to read more, and went back to
the house. ASH drew neal Iheard the
voice of old Mrs. Adams crying and
moaning, and asking herself why was
she ever born. and what had her dear
son. Their best an kin'es' son N trust
fullest husband in the world, ever done
ter deserve SIGH deceit an SIGH er blow
ter his hap'ness?" / was amazed be-
yond measure; but when I went i'll my
amazement was turned into bewilder-
ment at what l heard and learned.
Mrs. Adams started in fright when /
entered, and Iasked her what was the
matter. and she shrank from me as If l
were a ghost.
"Whnr is Hank? Didn't he fin
yer?" she asked, as if amazed.
"Where is he? Find me? Why, what
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-02-14
hev. Go, quick, befo' I furget

She glanced at the note, recovered
her spirits in q moment, andthen burst
into a peal of the merriest laughter 1
ever Granddaughter in which real
mirth was mixed with the melody of q
happy heart suddenly relieved Of a
great burden. Then, before he could
recover from the stupor into which
this threw him, she ran up the steps,
grabbed his face in both her hands,
looked into his honest eyes a moment,
and then kissed him repeatedly, laugh
ing and crying, and exclaiming:
|. "You sweetest of husbands, and did
this little note make you jealous?
And did you have that gun to kill me
on sight, or the man whom you thought
l had gone with?"
She explained the note was one she
had penned as the beginning Of a little
! story she was going to write for an
Eastern paper, and which she did not
intend Hank to see until she read it to
him in the paper. She had written
several stories, and had been paid for
them, and was going to use his name
in this one, and then read it to him,
and tell him the secret.
It was q merry household that night,
and I never was treated so royalty IN
my life. Hank took me out into the
horse lot" after dinner, and saw that
no one else was neal, and then said:
MI. Mcpherson, [ hope yer will not
hint ter jimmy whit er blamed fool l
made O. myselfover tibet fool thing. By
jings, I trimble when I think how near
I come ter shootin' yer. I hev told
mother ter never breeth er word O.
whut carryin's on we had fore jimmy
come back. It haslarned me er lesson
"a bitter one, too. I'll never be jeal-
Gus O. my wife ergain. I think a
jealous man is ther bigges' fool on
earth. I said this onct befo', when
saw err play erbout tibet Teller, "Thello
an Desdymony, but I never knew whut
it meant till now. A man whut is
jealous ov a wife whut is lovin' an:
gentle an bright to him at home is a
villain; that's whut [ think. An
don't want jimmy ter ever know whut
er blamed fool I wuz fur nothin'."
l promised I never would tell, and
have eve done SO. If they see this
they will know who wrote it, perhaps
but I know they will forgive me, and
l know that Hank will bear me no i'll.
will for thus breaking the spirit of my
promise, as there is a great lesson il
this experience to others. I think
most of us can profit by "Hank Adams
Bitter Lesson"
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-02-14
She Would Like to Be Wicked Just 70,
0ncn

There is an inherent desire in the
breast OF nearly every oma of life
and spirit to be at times just the least
bit wicked. She wants to don the un-
mentionables occasionally, figuratively
speaking, and go out and have a time.
AS a young married lady remarked the
other day to an intimate female friend:
How I would like to go suit on a 'toot'
some night. 1 want to take in the back
rooms OF two or three saloons, drink a
glass Oh two Of beer, and eat some dry
bologna and Swiss cheese. My hus-
band occasionally brings a lunch of
that sort home with him, and accom-
panies it with a bottle Of beer, but
there is no fun in it unless you go TO
headquarters. 1 have often urged my
husband to show me the elephant to
a mixed extent, and have offered to
wear q veil or his old clothes, but he
always frowns down my opportunities,
and 1 don't think it would be much
fun, anyway, to go with ones own hus-
band. Why should we be so circum-
scribed in our amusements? I for one
propose to get out of the old rut some
night, and, while [ don't intend to be
too wicked, 1 shall be Just wicked
enough to enjoy myself" And there
is no doubt but hat she Will. He,
ideas may be condemned, but in how
many feminine hearts will YOU find O
reflex of her desires !-SacrGmentc
| Bee.
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-02-14
Disappointed.

There was a certain nobleman at the
court of Louis XIV. Of France who was
known to be Unfortunately anxious for
distinction. One day the King asked
him if he understood the Spanish Ian
guaSe.
sNo, sire," was the answer.
That is unfortunate" said the King.
The nobleman at once conjectured
that the King wished to make him am
bassador to Madrid. He accordingly
employed a teacher and applied himself
day and night to the acquisition of the
language.
At last, pale and exhausted, but with
a satisfied and expectant LOOK upon his
face, he came to the King with the al
nouncement:
"Sire, Z can now speak Spanish"
3Do you understand it we'll enough
to converse intelligently with a Span
iard?"
"Yes, SIRE" the man replied. in cage,
expectation.
Il wish you JOY" said the King; snow
you can read Don Quixote' in tAt
original"
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-02-14
COMM back shows no might be inner

comm back shows Ito m1ght be inner
aHis bosses an buggy amt no sign,
nor his bein' back hear, nuther, cause
he'd be sharp enough ter try an bin
us that way. But I'll let yer hev yer
way. mother, SEEM as We air all 1 hev
LET ter me now"
He handed me the paper. and 1 read,
in a clear, feminine hand, these terri
bly, plain words, the outraged husband
watching me closely as I read:
Dear Hank-I thought / loved you
once, but 1 find / do not. I ought to
have told you before. but could not
bear TO do so, as you seemed so happy.
1 cannot longer bear the loneliness,
and the drudgery, and the desolation
of life here. If 1 staid longer 1 should
hate you for bringing me here. 0, how
can 1 sign my name to this terrible let
ter? I go away with n you do not
know. but do not try to find me. It
will be useless. I will not sign my
name, because I want you to forget it.
Forgive me, as 1 hope God will"
That was all. But l trembled as ]
read it, and staggered, and would have
fallen, had not his strong arms caught
me.
Mr. Adams" I managed to say.
this is, indeed, terrible. How you
ever came to imagine [ was concerned
in it l do not know. But, kill me il
you will; but, if you believe I did this
terrible thing. / shall die forgivine
YOU. L believe that if God ever does
forgive q murder, it is when a man
Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1890-02-14
The o e
BY CLARA Nj. HOWARD.

I sawa garden, in springtime,
Prepared with greatest care,
And L thought when ono tho nm
hare Covers will be blooming there.
But summer found i'll the garden
sui many q noxious weed.
With never q, flower among them,
For none had own the seed.
/ a n life that gave promise
0f Il harvest rich and rare,
Had the fertile soil been tended,
Aud the seed been planted there.
Neglected and implanted
O'ersrown with sims foul wecda-
o, the lowers we might gather
Did VIC only SOW tho seedsl
Oh. the precious moments wasedl
Tho deeds of love undone;
The bitter thoughts wo cherished
Come back to us one by onei
And We sigh FOR the vanished sprlnG-tlme
OF whicl, we took no heed.
Oh. ihe harvest we might gather
Did we only sowt the sccdl
fad We soNn the seeds Of virtue,
OF holy love and truth,
OF charity ald kindness
In The srrinstilne of our youth,
In Tie autumn we'd have gathered
a harvest rich and rare
A harvest OF fragrant flowers
Been blooming for us there.
Ned nave never cause to murmur
At the hardness of our lot;
Our lines full Of contentment-
In palace or in cot.
Did Ne Improve the golden springtime,
Root out each oxiou weed
What n bountifal harvest waits us,
Do we only SOW The seedl
HARVEY. Wis.