davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1890-05-22
HUMOROUS.

-Snipper-"Do you believe you could
tell diamonds from paste?'' Shears ian
editor)-"Yes, can tell paste wherever
see it."-Lowell Citizen.
Considering that a cat has nine lives,
it seems pity that he should feel it
necessary to lengthen them by sitting
up so late at tnight.-Somervill journal.
-Tramp-"Well, mum, you see I've
been out of a job so long that hate to
tackle one now" Farmers Wife-"Ah,
you have become lazy?' Tramp-"No
mum; it's not laziness; it's disinclina.
tion to work"
There goes young fellow who
lives on the fat of the land, and yet
doesn't do a stroke of work" "How
does he do it?" "Well, you see, his
mother is the fat woman in the dime
museum. m".-Boston B.
Papa" said Mabel, "were you ever
in an ice palace?" NO." said the old
gentleman, "but I've had to get up at
five o'clock in the morning in January
to see what was the matter with the
heating apparatus, and l guess I'll try
and worry along without an ice palace. u
-Friend-"How are you coming on?'
Good. I've got the material
on hand for frst-class novel" "You
are a lucky man." "That's not all.
I've got the material for splendid com.
edy, besides" "You are fortunate. u
"Yes; all need now is the material for
new pair of pants. Texas Siftings.
Enter clerk with his face all swol.
len up with an angry tooth-"Ahv says
"a sympathetic friend, you should go tc
the dentist Immediately and have that
tooth pulled out" II know i ought,
says the sufferer, 'but the fact is
haven't got the nerve" "Ohl don't
bother about that. The dentist will find
the nerve. e."-Louisville Post.
-James-"Hullo, De Forest; how's
the world usin' ye, my boy?" De Fores
Now is the winter of our discomfort
Bad, bad, Jimmy. I'm playing Buck
ingham in Richard at fifteen a week
But anon, what cheer with you?'
James - "Hippopotamus in the 'Tir
Hippopotamus' at two hundred. Come
and dine with me. "-Harper's Weekly
Man Ito friend)-"You didn't seen
to treat that gentleman with polite
ness" Friend-'I spoke rather rough
ly, / admit" Man-"You have changed
toward him. The other day saw yol
cordially shaking hands with him.
"Yes, he owed me then, but he has pait
me; consequently, you see that am nj
longer under Obligations to him."-Ar
kansaw Traveller.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1890-05-22
AMERICAS NATIONAL BIRD.
4 Plea for the Patient, UncomplaininH
and Eminently Usefol Hen.

and Emnently Usefal Hen.
~ could never understand" remarked
Uncle Abner, when the conversation
turned on national emblems, why the
eagle was selected as the ornithological
representative of the United States"
''Why, is it not the king of birds?"
asked Nephew James.
IA king 1T may be-" assented Abner,
'if by king we mean something that
lives on the labor of others, and doesn't
earn its salt, but we haven't much use
for such monarchs in this country. The
eagle scars toward the sun, the orators
tell us, and looks the orb of day in tho
eye. There they leave him. They do
not watch him as he comes back, Won
dering If some humble subject has pre-
pared breakfast for him. He sees pa
tient and enterprising fisl,-hawk hover
ing near the surface Of tho lake, and he
waits until the hawk has secured nice
fat fish, when Mr.. Eagle gwoops down,
taps Mr.. Fish-hawk on the shoulder,
and says:
"'Beg pardon, but that's the very fish
/ had selected for my breakfast The
hawk drops it and the eagle breaks his
fast That is the kind of bird he is,
and he makes me tired"
"What bird would you prefer as the
American emblem?" asked two or three
at once.
1.-THE hen is my choicel The patient,
uncompla lining North American hen OF
commerce. The energetic way in which
she scratches for living is exactly typ
ical of the people of this country, and
when she has, by diligent perseverance,
accumulated store of eggs for the pur'
pose of running opposition to the pat
ent incubator, and that nest is broken
up by boys or by housewives, she goes
to work at another, just as patiently as
an American goes into business again
before he is well through with his first
failure. And then, her persistence
Boys, did you ever try to set hen when
her mind was made up not to set; OIL
endeavor to dissuade hen from set
ting when her conscience told her thai
spring chickens we're needed? If yor
have ever done either, you will under
stand something of the hens claims tc
represent this active, restless, progress
i've country. She is energy and cleal
grit all through, and sho is, on account
of these characteristics, entitled to sup
plant the eagle in the armorial bearing
of this country. Besides the appro
priateness Of this, on account of he
Industrious habits, the adoption of tn,
hen as the National bird would hell
to keep in the minds of the American
people two incidents, related of mel
intimately connected with the discover,
of this continent, and with the formation
of this great Nation"
"What are they, uncle?"
"Columbis' egg, and Washington
little hatch it."-William II. Siviter, II
Jury.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1890-05-22
WISE BOSTON STUDENTS.
Thoy Keep House and Have Every Thing
Their Own Way.


There are at least twenty students at
Boston University who are securing a
college education in a large city and at
the same time enjoying all the advan.
tages Of dormitory life.
These are to be found at 81 and 80
Holyoke street. They are known col
lectively as lambda charge of Theta
Delta Chi, and enjoy the distinction of
being the only college fraternity hav-
ing clubhouse in Boston. The house
is headquarters for brethren from other
colleges who happen in the city.
There is no green-eyed monster of fe-
male shape there to rake in the shekels
on mysterious delicacies. The boys live
on the best of the market, and it is not
an expensive rate, either. In their
unique plan commissary is appointed
who makes the purchases and attends
to all the necessities of the dining ROOM
in return for which he is exempt from
board bill
The actual expense of the week is
added up at the end of each week and
apport!oned equally among the feeders.
Thus they are free from all the disa-
greeable ingredients that go to make
up a boarding-house meal. The chef is
not exactly French, but near it."
In short, they have ''all the comforts
of home" IAN they gifts it 'alf price"
Accommodations equal to those at
the club would cost the average student
at least IS per week. 1t is estimated
that S. per week would cover all ex-
penses of room and board, the board
averaging something like $3.50 each
week.
The Accommodations of the house are
much too small now. after three years
trial of the club, and next fall the
students will be located in more COM
modious quarters nearer the college
There is also some talk of uniting
with the ten "Tech" students, who are
soon to be instituted as chapter of the
fraternity, so that plans may be made
for a larger clubhouse that shall accom-
modate at least fifty.-Boston Evening
Ponord
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1890-05-22
ITEMS ABOUT WOMEN.

Miss MAUD CoTToN has been appoint
ed deputy collector of internal revenue
for the Seventh Indiana District by Col
lector Throop.
A New York letter says: ''There are
four female dentists in this city. One
of them, who graduated in Philadelphia
two or three years ago at the head of
class of sixty-one men, already has a
large clientage up town."
THE wife of Hermann Kaulbach, the
painter, is beautiful, clever, and a nota-
bly, fine swimmer, She has lately re-
cived the gold medal of the Order of
Merit Of the Bavarian Crown for hav-
ing, at the risk of her own life, saved
young man from drowning
Mrs. LIvERMoRE says that her hus-
band is Republican while she is Pro-
hibitionist; he is a protectionist and she
free-trader; he has a pew in one
church, she in another; he has one doc
tor, she another; and yet they are hap
py and harmonious and never dream of
quarreling.
AT recent election in Concord, N.
H., the woman suffragists scored a sig
nal victory, electing their candidate for
the board of education by a majority of
773 votes in total of 3,S26. Mrs. Wood
worth, the successful candidate, is
graduate of Vassar College, and is the
first woman ever elected to public Office
in Concord.
Rev. ANNIs +. EASTMAN, of Brock
ton, N. Y, lately occupied the pulpit of
Rev. Thomas X. Beecher, of Elmira, n.
Y, and preached two sermons to great
congregations that crowded auditorium
and gallery. DR.. Beecher assisted in
the ordination of Mrs. Eastman last fall,
and was SO struck by her exceptional
fitness for the ministry that he invited
her to come and address. his congrega-
tion.
Miss MARGARET II. McCALLA has
served for fourteen years as the superin-
teudent OF the Bloomington, Ind, city
schools During much of the earlier
portion of her service she was the only
woman in the State holding the position
Of superintendent of schools. Her devo-
tion and ability have given the Bloom
ington schools high standard, and her
resignation recently, because OF failing
health, is deeply regretted
Miss ANDREA HoFER, girl Of twenty,
is editor of the McGregor (Is.) News,
She carries on the paper herself, doing
all the editorial as5 nearly half of the
,x,oob,nso.l ur0,l 0ha hos x.-orIyo1 i
the Office since she was ten years old
and has graduated ont Of every depart
ment Her helpers. boy and girl, botl
younger than herself. set the cores
pondence and clippings. The editorials
notes. reviews. etc, Miss Hofer sets il
type as she thinks them out her tim
being too precious 70 write them
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1890-05-22
FOOLED THE MAGICIAN.
A FOXY Amateur Gets tho Best of Her
mann In Private Performance.

A FOXY Amateur Gets tho Best of Herr.
mann In a Private Performance.
1t is related of Hermann, the magi-
ian, who is fond of playing his tricks
off the stage, to amuse his friends that
he was accosted one evening in an up
town cafe by a conceited-looking man
who had been watching the prestidi-
gitateur do some clever sleight-of-hand
work, and finally broke in with:
"You're pretty clever man, Mr..
Hermann, but can do trick as good
as any of yours. 1 can change five.
cent-piece that you may hold in your
clenched fist into one-dollar gold
coin"
"Why, my dear fellow" laughed the
magician, that's one of the simplest
tricks in my profession, one that an
adept would think it beneath him to
perform. He might amuse child with
it, perhaps, but so could mere be-
ginner."
"You may laugh at it" persisted the
man; "but I'll bet you can't do it."
Nonsense" said Hermann, 81
wouldn't"
you're stuck, old man," sneered the
conceited one; "Ill bet could play it
on you and you can't play it on me, and
amt in the perfesh either"
"Do it for him, Hermann, if just to
shut him up and get rid of him." said
one of the bystanders.
"Well, where's your fve-cent piece?"
said the magician, rather wearily.
"There it is" replied the rival
wonder-worker; 'now change it to a
oae-dollar gold coin if you can"
"Now I'll show you," said Hermann,
show an amateur magician or tyro in
the profession would proceed to perform
this idiotic little triclt before drawing.
room full of children or gaping crowd
of country pumpkins at country fair.
EXTEND your arm," he comm anded
with wave of his hand, assuming a
nock-heroic attitude.
The man showed out his hand, in the
palm of which lay five-oent piece.
This is your own coin, my friend?'
"Yes."
you're sure of that?"
"Yes."
| ''Tell the audience whether there is
any collusion between us to deceive
them in any way"
There amt any,"
"All is fair and above board, gentle.
men and ladies. No fraud, collusion,
or any thing of that kind whatsoever.
Shut your hands tight my friend. Now
take care not to let your coin slip
Clench it. Presto" and Hermann
made several theatrical waves and passes
with his arms.
Now open your hand"
The man did so, and there lay 9
bright, new one-dollar gold piece.
"Well, you did it after ALL" said the
conceited one cunningly, little crest
fallen, 'and as slick as 1 could hav,
done it myself" and se turned to q
away.
Goodbye" said Hermann, "yol
may leave me my gold dollar, though
before you 60"
what do you mean?" said the man
with a twinkle in his eye.
"Why. the gold dollar palmed of OF
you. Here's your five-eent piece"
Nonsense, said the man; ',yol
changed my fve-cent piece into golt
coin without its leaving my hand. II
leave it to the crowd if you didn't"
The crowd promptly burst into
-x,.r Ja-ia=;1z Aha i.a-h --.c f-:-
ly on Hermann, and compromise wa
effected by which the apparently con
ceited stranger passed the gold coli
over the bar and all dram, to the cleve
magician, the amateur remarking wit
grin: Here's luck to you. old man
till you're tired Of it"--Chicago Jouru
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1890-05-22

want OF readiness, but from iong habits
of self-distrust. All these are draws
backs that must be cleared away II
women are to compete with men in what
has hitherto been mems sole work.
Whether it is best that they should SO
compete is not now the question; for the
Bureau of Statistics show it to be al
ready settled
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1890-05-22
Helping HIM Out.

The Young Man (argumentstively)-
but, don't you see, Miss Bessie, that
when you reason in that way you are
only begging the question?
The Young Woman (blushing beauti.
fully)-I am sure, Mr.. Penducle, IL
didn't intend to-to beg you TOTO ask
me any question:
Sudden mastering up of courage on
the part of the bsshful Mr.. Peduncle
aud agitated propounding of question
Miss Bessie had been waiting to hear. I
Chicago Tribune.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1890-05-22

weli-0ff-It isn't true that you're en-
gagged to that cock-eyed, hair-lipped,
broken-nosed Miss Real Estate, is it?
Hard-Up (cheerfully)-Yes, cards will
out in a week.
But you can never have any affection
yuch a scare-crow?"
sest assured that ! would never
her II did not love her lots
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1890-05-22
GOLDENiIEAD.

Blue as the June skies
Were her wondering eyes;
And her laugh was as glad and free
AS the south wind on the sea-
Summer ahl summer is fled,
And with 1t Goldenhead.
Dear little Goldenhead-
How sweet must her laughter be,
Happy her childish glee,
Now that her feet are led
Where the shining pathways rise
Through Paradise.
summers gone, but she is not dead,
Our little Goldenhead.
William Sharp, in N. Y. Independent.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1890-05-22

The laws Of Wyoming require equal
ray for equal work to men and women
- school teachers
The Anaconda standard. [volume] (Anaconda, Mont.) 1889-1970, 1890-05-19
SPORTING GOSSIP.

Isaac Murphy has engaged Ia ride for J.
B. Haggin.
Orrin Hickok has given II horses REG
orls ranging from 2:l1h I o 2:a.
Roy Wilkes, 2;i2a4, will make n short
season In the stud this year ut Terrc
Hautc
When old Joe Battin makes three hits in
a game Il Is time for the youngsters Ia
brace up.
Ike Weir says he will quit the ring and
go to work unless he ran get n fight with
some person..
Sir Dixon has shown a mile i'm l:iTk,
aud gives every evidence OF standing a
strong preparation.
Robespierrc. with S3.sa5. was the chief
winner at Nashville. Ida Pickwick, with
S3,3i2. TODD second on the list.
Toledo is coming down the strctch like
n four-timc winner. The Black Pirates
are q strong aggregation of ball players.
Buiinton blamcs his poor showing la
the fact that he has not got down to his
pitching weight. Perhaps that IL what
ails all the boys.
Some Of the players in the California
league have queer me Here are some
of the qucerest: L~ookabaugh. TIT. Pace.
DePaughcr, Tribon.
Elmer Foster is playing great ball for
Minneapolis. In the first twelve games he
| made a batting average of .3SS and "A field
ing average of 1000.
That $1,000 fine imposed on l.. T.. Davies,
owner of Roy Wilkes, at Lexington las,
fall goes. andothe fast PAGER cannot start
again until IL is paid.
Some Of the Canadian fiat racers and
! jumpers, with Bledsoe al the head. may
put In an appearance at West Side park,
Chicago, before long.
The Golden Gate club Of San Francisco
has put up a purse of 5000 10 he Tough
for by Denny Kellihcr INT doe Filings
worth. The fight will take place May -
Manager Mutric says that lac released
O'Rourke a Scanlon to reduce ex-
penscs. O'Rourke is an excellent catcher
and should not be long OUT of employ
ment.
The Boston scorers still insist on putting
wild pitches, passed balls and bases on
balls In the error column of their cores,
thus senselessly ~disflguring them, and
against the instructions of base bal
authorities at that.
Fitzpatrick has engaged with Pierr,
Lorillard as heavyweight jockey. Will
two such crack shots as Fitzpatrick aud
Taylor to- guide his fine youngsters, ia,
The Anaconda standard. [volume] (Anaconda, Mont.) 1889-1970, 1890-05-19

the door he could hear two men talking In
low ones
"Tnis isn't the stable" he heard some
"No, confound it.' replied another. ~
| remember now the stable was back OF the
castle. We will 20 n tab two OF the
best horses and carry them around by q
lodge gate. We will not only get n hand.
some ransom for the count, but we will
also have three of his hest horses. IL 10
now II o'clock, and we must be at the
rendezvous bya. Conceive have no ''me
Norvitski lay perfectly still until the
sound Of the footsteps died away In the
distance, when he arose and. dropping out
of the window, noiselessly approached the
castle and pulled the large brass knocker.
Its echoes had scarcely stopped vibrating
came too the door n enquired h was
wanted.
~ must see kour master al once" re-
piled Petroff in q low voice.
"You must come I'm the morning." re-
piled the ervant. "Master has long
since retired, fatigued with the chase OF
the day"
~ must see our master at once" rcit-
Grated Petroif. ~ may save his life. Go
| and deliver my order! he commanded.
Seeing from Norvitski's excited man
ner that something Of importance re-
utllrNfu Tilt fOuElt y lIilttietlIhtS
the servant hastily departed. Returning
In n few minute he admitted PetroH and
conducted him to the count, who had
slipped into q dressing gown and was sit
ting on the side OF the bed.
swell, fellow, what brings you here at
such an u1seemly hour?' asked the
count, in an e~xasperated voice.
"Your own secretary replied PETROL.
boldly. He then, In as few words as pos
sible, related his story.
"well, that is audacity i'm TRUTH" said
the count. i'm a o OF surprise. 81 was
captured once by brigands In kroski's
pass and had tn pay a round sum for my
freedom, but | never thought of anyone's
entering the castle to coInmi sIcha deed.
Perhaps we will reverse things this time"
The servant who had announced Pc
trolls knock was summoned and to him
the count old the tale.
"Thcrc il no use in alarming the house
hold" he said; ''wc three a easily take
them. They will effect an entrance by
way OF the buttcry, and as q o as they
are well In the house we must capture
them"
Plans were laid, and the three noise
lcssly descended to the buttery, the count
leading the way with a lamp over which
was thrown a large cloak so that its rays
could not he seen. Secreting themselves
in different parts of the room, they ner-
vously awaited developments.
Soon after the clocks i'm the castle struck
I a file was heard swiftly and almost nois-
Iessly going through the iron easement.
In thirty-flvc or forty minutes -though IL
seemed an age TO the watchers-part OF
the easement was removed and "A cat-like
tread was heard In the room, followed i'm
mediately by another. As the mufiied
feet approached the door leading to the
the lamp, n three voice called out sim.
ultancOusly:
The Anaconda standard. [volume] (Anaconda, Mont.) 1889-1970, 1890-05-19
NREAT NORTHERN R'Y LINE

Montana Central Railway.
Great Northern Railway.
Eastern Railway Of Minnesota.
N Willmar II iou Falls Railway.
~ Duluth, WATERFOWL Il Pacific Railway.
The Anaconda standard. [volume] (Anaconda, Mont.) 1889-1970, 1890-05-19

Commencing with this sale on Saturday the first TEN Ladies
buying a boys suit, regardless of price, will be given a boys coat.
Bring the boys and clothe them.
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1890-12-09
AMERICAN rEDEn rIoS OF LABOR.
Annual Meeting IN Detrott-Soctaiisf
Knock for Admission.

Annual Meeting IN Observation-Disclosures
Knock for Admission.
DETROIT. Dec s.--Eightv delegates to
the American Federation OF LABOR assem-
bled this morning and were welcomed TO
the city by the president OF the Board OF
Trade, IN the absence of the mayor. Presi-
dent Gofnpers, OF the federation, responded.
Gompers then delivered the annual adj
dress. He advised the convention TO avoid
controversial questions and concentrate
their efforts upon such issues as the members
we're most agreed upon; that such course
bad been best evinced by the success OF
the eighi-hour movement. The agitation
Tor reform had been successful in 1877 cities
and had benefited 1900 workmen in the
carpenters trade. besides countless others
In other branches of the bu ding trade.
The demand for eight hours should be
made by other trade organizations. and
its final success cannot be questioned.
The next industry to make the demand
vas TO be the coal miners. They viii move
on Mar, ft91.
During the year the federation estab-
lished PA local branches of the National
Trades Union. and the 9i3 existing
branches had added TO So per cent. in
membership.
The address declares in favor of system
81 national unions of individual trades.
During the fear 1.16s author zed strikes
nave taken place. Of shich $50 succeeded,
seventy-six tailed and ninety-eight were
compromised.
Corners refers in commentator to the
proiect OF an international labor congress
IN 1893, coincident wi h the Worlds fair !;
demands the enforcement Of the eight-hour
law in government work; asks for suit
able federal alien contract labor law; sug-
gests an extended observance of Labor Day
as an annual holiday; warns against child
labor, and declares ios international copy
right and ballot reform.
When the COMMITTEES on credentials went
into session, Gompers appeared before
them 10 object to receiving any papers
from deleaates from the Central Labor
Federation (socialistic} OF New York. The
committee decided 10 allow the socialists
to present their case to the convention to-
MORROW
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1890-12-09
MUEDEmEp At SEA.
Captain Lyali, oftar Buckingham, Killed
on His Own snip.

Captain Lyall, OF tinr Buckingham, KfIled
on Ills Own snip.
NV YORK, Dec. Especial. THE four
masted steel British ship Buckingham
came into port today with one of her het-
erogeHeous crew. black barbarian from
Mauritius, named Crosse, tied 10 stanch-
ion on the main deck forward, with his face
turned to the northerlv snowiaden blast
and another savage manacled i'll the iron
deck-house. The ensign of the stately ship
was at haif-mast for her dead commander.
Captain Peter Lyall, a young Scotchman,
whose body lies many fathoms deep off the
bleak and rugg"d >hs tland islands. The
men murdered him October H. the first an
niversary of the captains marriage in
Brooklyn to a comey young Scotch
woman, who began q voyage to Calcutta
with him on their honeymoon and came
back on the ship widow.
Two members of the produce exchange
Captain Lawrence Garrick and Mr.. Barr,
friends of the couple went down the bay
on tug in the snowstorm to meet the
giant ship. prepared to congratulate the
happy pair of vcy ayers The ensign at
naif-mast gave them warning, and Mrs.
Ls all, who was standing in the cabin door,
greeted them with tears. They shortly
learned of the brutal murder of the cap
tain, and his subsequent burial In the
ocean of Shetland islands.