The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-05-25
BRIGHT BITS.
FAT WOMEN are good-natured, aye,
And talk much less than thin;
A curious fact. for. strange to say,
They've all a double chin.

FAT WOMEN are good-natured aye,
And talk much less than thin;
curious fact. for. strange TO say,
They've all a double chin.
Boston Courier.
WHAT is an old fogy?'"
"a man who tries to walk so straight that he
leans backward. ~ Chicago Times.
81 AN another man since was rnarred!'s ex-
claimed the happy benedic...
And does your wife love that other man?''-
Puck. ~
FIRST TRAMP-Jerry, what's your opinion of
de eighthour movement?
Second ,TrampvIts my honest opinion dat
eight hours movement is a heap TOO much for
one day rerre HGpte Erprsssy
Miss KEEN-Is Mr. Bright an Irishman:
Miss Blunt-An Irishmanf Why, no. What
Miss Keno. he Is always making such pat
remarKs.-SoH.eI vile Journal.
A THOUSAND CONGRATULATIONS, old fellow,"
shouted his chutn to the hereof a German stu
dent duel; that was glorious victory How
ao6, He'd ali cut upy' replied the champion.
Puck.
WIFE-Why, husband. I thought you had
more sense than to buy a cornet. You know
the fellow next door worries us nearly to death
with his. N-t--
Husband-CaIm yourself, my ear. That's
the one bought.-Detrolt Free Press.
But ! don't think I have the pleasure of
your acquaintance"
20, yes, | trod on your foot about half an
hour since aud heard you say you would re-
member me as long as you lived. The Jester
CoUNTRYMAN lat a Bowery museum. reading a
sign over a vacant chair, THE only Patagonian
ever brought to this country'0 Say, where's
the Patag onanf +
Lecturer absent mindedly) -He'll be back n
a minute. He's just gone round to his mothers
His brothers been run over.-Chdtter.
MoTHER-Do you allow Mr.. Comeagain to kiss
you Bertha?
NO. indeed. assure you, mother, he kisses
me only when he starts to leave"
Mother-How many times did he start to
leave last mig t.?
Bertha-About fifteen times, | think.-Har-
per's Bazaar. 1n.
EMPLoYER-Patrick, have you tapped the
| maple trees in the yard. as l told you to this
incoming?
Patrick trecently arrived from Cork)-Yis,
scr, but dlvil a OFT av juice KEN from them.
Employer-Strangel This has been beautiful
sugar weather. What did you tap them with !?
Patrick-Wid a sthick, sor AMI begorra OF
shtruck them hard, tool-Burlington Free
! Press.
DON'T you remember me, ma amy" said the
emaciated tramp. Il stopped he e last miner
| and moved your lawn for you"
WHY, you are not that magnificent tramp
that Hercules, to whom gave my first loaf of
| br ad?'
II am the same" rs.
What has worked such dreadful changes in
| so short timer"
Your first loaf of bread, ma'am"-New
| York Sun.
DEAREST" said Miss Serena to her own and
| only, as they were coming no ne in the gloam-
| ing, do give me your opinion on a Ii erary
! question. Why does the young man in Bayard
| Taylor poem protest that he will love his love
until the leaves OF the ldgment book unfold I?
What is there in the unfolding of the leaves of
| the judgment book to prevent him from keep
/ ing right on loving her?''
Very easily explained, my dear Serena ;"
replied the youth. The Judgment book, of
course, contains the history of his former
hirtatons, which. when read aloud to the
( assembled nations, makes the girl look so mad
and disguised that, naturally, he can't love her
any more. '-Pac4.