Blue-grass blade., 1890-11-15
You see a noble generosity like

| You see a noble generosity lik'
that of "Silver Tongue" stand
in striking contrast with that o
..J,' that would not give "pooI
Lo" even a drink of whisky. It,
hard to down man like "Silvel
Tongue" Such men, like Ban.
quo's old chestnut ghost, will not
"drwn at the biddlng' Of yo Pro.
hibition crank, aud if they dc
down him for u while, they find
that "it's hard to keep u good
man down. as the whale said
when he found that Jonah would
not lie on his stomach and he had
to wade ashore and "cast" him
up.
"Silvcr Tongue" goes to Wash
ington and gets in hIs work for
whisky by his vote for the
"original package bilI,' but when
he comes home you don't hear
the newspapers saying anything
about his going to the races
and getting turned over in a
buggy as he goes home, by run
nning against a blasted rock that
was dissipating a little and had
gotten itself off the side of the
road into the middle of the turn
pike.
No, "Silvcr Tongue" doesn't
go to the races, doesn't say" "dam,'
either in horse talk or profanity,
doesn't chew tobacco, smoke u
pipe, tell nasty stories or commit
any of the conventional peca-
dilloes Of the Kentucky regulation
politician.
But with q melifluous cadence
he would talk as sweetly as if he
were yet in the pulpit, and will
"roar you as gently as sucking
dove in words that exhale a
holy perfume on the circum-
ambient air,as they fall like petals
from the last rose of summer.
If somebody will manage that
political AdOnis, that mundane
angel from whose shoulders the
wings are sprouting for the realm
of harps and palms, this cham
pion of whisky and Sunday
Schools the Bluegrass Blade and
1 will try and set up with $40
aud all the Lexington editors and
beer .jerkers just by our two lone
selves.
But "Sllver Tongne' is too
much for me.
Now l am going TO say the
ugIiest thing that | ever said in
any newspaper Cr anywhere else,
and people who want to stop
their papers on account of it are
to send in their cards
all at once, and let me gel
the job of taking their
names oft my lists.
L never swore an oath IN nv
life: but last summer Il blasted
old stray COW got into my hay field
and | tried to drive her out. The
hay was the thickcst | ever saw
grow ON the ground. and to run
through it was rs hard as running
through Il snow drift four feet deep.
But instead of being cold it was
hot as the dickens, and the sweat
rolled off me like shot off shovel.
| ran the burned old COW for
mile and Il half through that stand
ing timothy, and when ! finally
broke down she was ut the iurthest
corner of the field from the only
gate into it, and the field was in-
closed by new wire and picket
fence and Il strong, new plank,
fence.
That old stray COW had Knocked
down fourteen dollars worth of
hay and was still tramping around
in it where you could not see
much of her but her horns
sticking up. | was 50 mad |
didn't know what to do, and |
came So near swearing, if | did
not do it, that | went to the house
and confessed to my wife, and let
the old COW tramp down about
four dollars worth more.
But Ill tell you what | have
concluded: When | do swear my
first oath | am not going to waste
it upon the desert air of II pachy-
dermatous stray COW. ] am going
to swear one that the natives will
recollect, like they do "tncle
Toby's" oath in "Tristram Shan
dy
am going to wait until get an
appreciativc audience, and | am
going to raise my hand toward
high heaven, and say,
such man as "Silver Tongue.