The Ottawa free trader., 1890-01-04

~& Gar as they are to
Queen Viatoria; but
at the same time, it is SAID that he has some
ideas about reform that are not altogether
TO be despised.
He always gets what money he requires
for his personal use, IL the money Is In the
country. When he sends out one OF his
wives-he has several thousand-to borrow
q cup of parched coffee, or little brandy
In glass Tor the cramps, he always gets
II. Several thousand years ago one OF tho
Shah's ancestors sent across the street for
tho temporary loan Of a toothbrush, or
some similar agricultural implement, but
the unneighborly neighbor sent back word
that he was using it. The consequence
was that the Shah then sent his private
executioner over with bag and little
hatchet to borrow the neghbor's head,
and ever since that time the neighbors
have been so kind. They esteem it favor
to be allowed to contribute.
The Shah OF Persia can readily supply all
his other wants. When he shakes his hand
at tho saloonkeeper the latter knows what
to do But there is an aching void in his
treasury department. His government Is
run similar to that OF a certain Texas city
that was financially embarrassed q few
years ago. There was no money in the
treasury, except city scrip, and that could
only be given away when large chrome
was added as an inducement. The city
officials were only paid at large intervals.
and then In homeopathic doses, which,
nevertheless caused some OF them to throw
up their commissions. The city assessor
had to sweep out the Offices, act as police
man and light the street lamps, while the
only policeman of the town had to get on the
board as Alderman, drive the scavenger
cart and act as mayor when that function
ary was overworked or out of town. 1t may
not be quite so bad as that in Persia, but
the situation Is very dscouraging.
The country is infested by robbers and
murderers, who have sufficient influence to
set the law at defiance or evade 1t. High
way robberies are committed almost within
sight OF the Shah's palace. But the education
al condition Of Persia Is still moredlstressing.
There are no public schools worthy OF the
name, consequently the young generation
Of Persians is growing up in ignorance.
One Of the consequences Of this is that
many OF them, not being qualified for any
other occupation are loafers and vaga-
bonds, while all the lucrative positions are
being filed by outsiders, who come from
states where the free-school system reigns.
The Shah, who has travelled great deal
In Europe, and is very observant man,
perceived that those countries in which ed
ucation and intelligence prevailed were
powerful and respected. He noticed this to
be the case with England and Germany.
The Shah also visited Spain, Portugal and
Italy, and was surprised at the squaid pow
erty OF the people, and the contempt which
other nations entertained for them. The
Shah made up his mind on his return to his
native country he would subdue the ban
ditti and establish an efficient system Of
public schools.
But to obtain the arrest Of outlaws with.
out Offering rewards and to establish free
schools without money was a very difficult
question to solve. The Shah had no large
school fund, and instead Of n cash balance
there was Il huge aching void in his treas
ury just as the Shah was about 70
give up in despair, he was seized with Q
raging toothache. Neither he nor his sew
eral thousand wives got wink Of sleep for
a whole week. Nothing could be done for
his relief.
The Hakeems and Mollahs who ran the
augury and clarvoyaut business in Persia,
held solemn conclave, and the oracle de-
clared that the only hope FOR relief was in the
Shah's holding certain root in his hand.
Upon further inquiry it was disclosed that
tho root referred to was the root of the
tooth. 1t just had to come out. A French
dentist was escorted with brass band and
a guard OF honor TO the palace, and in the
presence OF TIE officers OF state, the
aolar Of the Shah was yanked out. A
royal salute was fired, and the entire people
gave themselves up to public thanksgiving.
But the point is this: ut is customary
a Persia whenever the Shah Is rescued
rom any danger for the wealthy mobiles to
repair TO the palace, bringing witu them
bags OF gold or rich jewels as presents"
On this occasion nearly all the wealthy
who had refused to contribute 3
cent to the public-school system or to orer
my reward for the stage robbers came for
ward and filed the Shah Golfers.
The Shah got new wrinkle. He now sees
his way clear TO establish free schools all
over Persia, and he will have enough money
eft over to Offer rewards for the arrest ofthe
stage robbers The Shah winked at his
minister OF finance not long ago, and init
pated that he had nineteen teeth left, and
hat every one OF them was hollow and
would have TO come out, and also that he
'ather enjoyed laughing gas. As long
Is the teeth hold out the Shah will
lsve plenty OF money to carry out
us reform measure. He says he would
-ather 20 down into his grave without
mag in his head than 10 have 1t SAID Of him
hat he encouraged highway robbers or a.
owed the children TO grow up in ignorance.
lie can be safely relied on 10 do all the pub
10 robbiug himself, but IL he educates the
Using generation his trips abroad. which
irst put the free-school idea into his head,
hould be encouraged
ALEX. E. Swlsr.
Brave Little Boy.