Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1890-11-22
HONEST CARL puNpER.
He Makes = Journey 90 BunAis tn Get n
Eye-Teeth Cut.


NE Makes Journey 20 BufsAis To Get ma
Eye-reeth Cut.
"Well, we'll, WELT" exclaimed Ser
geant Bendail yesterday. as 4 corpulent
form darkened the doorway OF the
Woodbridge Street Station. and he looked
up to see Carl Dunder walk In
"It vhas me. Sergeant"
.Yes, l see. Where on earth have
you been for the last three months?"
Sergeant, you know me for long
time"
"Yes."
81 vhas some hayseeds-"
"Yo were"
81 vhas so shildlike dot eafsrybody
shwindles me-"
"rhats true.s
"Nothings und nobody vhas twice
alike in dis country"
"No."
"Yon advise me TO soak my head,
sandpaper my neck, shump in der rifer
or hang myself"
"Yes. l did"
"Vell, ! like TO oblige yon. because
you vhas my friendt, but ! goes to Puff
falo instead. My bruder vhas in Puffa-
lol Ahi sergeant that Puffalo vhas .
great place--a great place. Sooch sharp
peoples you nefer saw. goes by my
bruder und take some lessons Dat
vbas der place to get some eye-teeth cut
out Sergeant, look at mer,
''l'm looking. You look like differ.
ent man from what you did You've got
a foxy look about the eyes. and nobody
would take you for greenhorn now"
Sergeant, | vhas more ash one fox
i wash four foxes. IL anybody can beat
me now j like To see him try ID on.
doan' take ten tousand dollar for what
learned in Puffalo."
"weli, I'm glad OF L. What aiis your
fnger?"
''She vhas brolxe-hal hal hai'
"a joke then?"
der biggest kind OF a shoke. While
yhas in Cleveland der odder day .
stranger comes oop to me und says vhill
buy some photographs OF Gsrfield'i
tomb ! hit him so queek ash light
ming, und dot finger vhas broken"
.What did you hit bim for?"
"Becanse he takes me for some hay
seed. Nobody has tomb until he vha,
dead"
but Garfield is dead"
mot mooch. Doan' / see aboudt him
] in der papers all der time. Doan' 1t say
: dot he shall vetoe dot silver bill"
That's Harrisonl You have got tn,
!; two mixed upr'
"You doan' say mel Yhas dot posi-
blel Vhas IL ben Harrison who vhai
President, instead of Ben Garfleld?"
"Of course"
'Great scots! Und dot feller vhas al
right, und ] almost killed himl II Gar
. field vhas dead / doan' remember 1t
Velll velll make oop for it, however.
''How?"
J ''on der train meet man who vha
: hard oop. He takes me for a sucker
He beliefs he can swindle me like seek
, ty. He has a watch und wants to sci
} him und get money to go by his mud
der's dying bedstead. He asked me fiftl
dollars"
! And you paid it?'
, Not moochl Dot isn't the Puffal.
vhay. | offered him twenty, und b.
: sheds some tears und says he shall ha
! b do it,"
'Got 1t with you?"
Yes Here she yhas."
Got tired, ] see, and stopped. Wheel
loose, too. Silver plate on nicke
ease. Worth five dollars bushel whel
the market isn't glutted. Mr.. Dunder
1t was swindle."
"Noa!"
! ''He took you in and made a fool o
you. What's In that package?"
'Some agency for Michigan. / bu.
! him in PufTalo."
Fly screen, eh? Where does IN,
agency come in? Isn't 1T likeany othe
fly screen?"
''She was reversible, You see. I bu,
der whole State agency for twenty-five
dollars"
Reversible? How?"
.'Voy. II you haf dis side out der file
can't come in. IL you haf dis sid,
out der bugs nnd mosquitoes can't com,
In"
"And he made you believe thatr'
''Belief thatl Can't / see init my tw,
eyes?'
YES, but look at that screen in IN.
window. Doesn't one side keep ever,
thing out. Yos have been victimiEed
all around"
Sergeant said Mr.. Dunder, as b.
rose up. was wictim?"
Yes"
"Doan' ] know more ash hay-stack.
"Not much"
"Vhas sfast as green ash before
goes TO Puffalo?"
''Greener.',
''Dot yhas all. Good byei When mi
body yhas pulled oudt of dot rifer shusl
speak init dem reporters und say dot
couldn't help it. | vhas n good man
but so child-like dot dis cold und
weeked world yhas no place for mer'-
Detroit Free Press.
Terrible Revenge.
"That was mean trick the editor ol