Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1890-08-29
ANNAPOLIS. MD. FRIDAY EVEN



the descriptive name Of ~Clawed. ~
Hartford Times.
The best cure for obesity is to board
for the summer at a farm house where
you will be treated like one of the fam
ily.-[ Boston Gazette.
As Elsewhere. -Teacher-W What reg
uiates the supply of liquor in Maine ?
The demand. -[Puck.
Jim-Jack, lend me a fiver. please?
Jack-Certainly Lend me the fiver
last loaned you and you can have it
boston Courier.
Intending Settler-But is Prairie City
well watered2 Kansan-Of course it is.
There amt no other water there but well
water. .-[West Shore.
Slightly Different. -Minister-Arc you
going to the church, miss Miss High
see-No, sir; I'm only member of the
choir, sir Yonkers Statesman.
Little Johnny calls neighbof Jones
Posterity. Johnny has been recently
told that @posterity" means those who
come after us. Boston Transcript.
The man best qualified to enjoy the
honeymoon is the one who had all the
romance kicked out of him before he
reached that period. Il Ashland Press.
A Good Idea. Sergeant you are
in love with the cook at Mr.. Browns, /
hear9 "Yes:" but only ON weeks
trial till ! see what sort of a cook she
is."
Snodgrass-Td like to pay that bill,
but can't just now. You must give
me time. CREDITOR don't mind giving
you time, but you seem to want eternity.
Life.
Mendicant-Can't you give me a few
pennies for my poor family at home,
sir2 Merchant-No, no, man; / don't
want to buy any poor family. .-[Yonkers
Statesman.
Incongruity. Mr. Figg- What are you
thinking over so deeply, my dear5 Mrs.
Fgg-I was just wondering whether to
cut off Tommy's curls or to make him
stop swearing.
Sufferer-Do you pull teeth without
pain? Dentist-Well, not always.
sprained my wrist last time pulled a
tooth and it hurts me yet occasionally.
-[Texas Siftings.
Gertie--What shocking fright that
Alden girl isl Her costumes are out
landish. Florence - No wonder. She
dresses according to the fashion articles
in the Sunday newspapers. Life.
Mrs. Gabb--Yes, my daughter appears
to have married very happily. Her hus-
band has not wealth, it must be ad-
mitted, but he has family. Mrs. Gadd-
Yes, heard he was a widower with six
children.
The latest device of girlhood is fancy
for stuffing pillows with their old love
letters. There is one thing about the
contents of these pillows that can be
depended upon with marked degree Of
certainty-they are sure to be soft.
Hicks--I saw Miss Whatshername to-
day. You know her well enough; that
plump little curly haired girl that used
to live in your street / can't recall her
name just now Hicks-Nor she either.
She was married last week. Boston
Transcript.
Algernon-Little Virgins is paying a
great deal of attention to Mrs. Portly,
the stout widow. Have you noticed il? +?
Augustus-Y Yes, she weighs about $50
and he about 100. The boys have a new
name for Virgins. They call him the
widows mite. II America.
A farmer sent to an orphan asylum for
q boy that was smart, active, brave,
tractable, prompt, industrious, clean,
pious, intelligent, good looking, re-
wrote back that, unfortunately, they
had only human boys in that institu-
ton.
What nonsense this is going the rounds
Of the press, that such and such woman
has been the first to be admitted to the
practice of the law in this country.
Haven't women, and particularly mar
ried women, been laying down the law
to men for centuries?- Philadelphia
Times.
John-Tm sorry / shall be away so
long, Miss Janet. You don't know how
hate to say good bye to you, but j sup
pose the best of friends must part, you
know. Janet-Oh, yess and what's the
use of people who are nothing to each
other growing sad over separation
That's the way look at it.
A-You see that fine house? The man
who owns it made all his money as a
cab driver. B-How did he manage to
do its A--Easy enough. He made it a
rule to know the exact minute when the
train left in which his passenger was
going. and reaching the station at the
very last moment, the passenger could
not dispute with him, no matter what
he charged.
You must push matters little,
James, said a chemist to his new boy;
Shy calling customers attention to this
article and that article, you often effect
sale. Yes, sir, responded the new
boy, and then he hastened to wait upon
| an elderly person who wanted 3 stamp.
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