Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1890-02-18
..T,,,x =. = ~. 70, =. 3 IN.

.sDunt ffse, ny boy. Yosr m = wsns
end the NJ Of the folkses tolerahsa
Ard then Jackson laid down On the
sofa and vent to sleep. and everything
| got blue: and there must hev been an
organ somewhere playing hymn tune,
and there WIS somebody peepin' in Ut
the winder. II wus the gentleman that
| had fiirted with the Low neeked girl, and
there wus two awful tramps with him.
Then one tramp says:
"Is that cur man. MASTER
And the gentleman says, Yes. and
told them that he had paid them well.
| and they must not slight their work.
| | thought he was going to have the
carpets shook. but when the other tramp
| said:
"Ay, AZ, master! Dead men tell no
| tales" got skeered. and then the gentle
man went away and the tramps got in at
the winder and came tiptoe down toward
jackson jefferson And one Of EN- took
| out big knife and the other handker-
| chuff. and it wus jest as plain as any
thing they meant to kill him.
Grandper jumped up to his feet again:
jackson" he hollers; but jackson
didn't wake up.
| Jackson wells Eben, but he never
stirred, and the tramps were tiptoeing
| along.
Come on, grandper." says Eben.
"Ay. my boy" says grandper.
| Jane, she shruck most fearful
saw grandper rush up the aisle, club
| hing his umbrella. and Eben doubling his
fist. All the congregation jumped up
and laughed and shrieked, and l saw
Eben catch the biggest tramp by his col
lar, and grandper catch hold Of the other
one by his belt, then the shade came
| down, and the band came out Of the
cellar doors and played away, and every
body laughed until up went the shade.
and out came stout gentleman with a
bald head, and says he:
| Ladies and gentlemen, allow Ine To
entreat your patience. The interruption
caused by misapprehension on the part
Of venerable guest from the country,
who, carried away by the realism of the
scene, bravely flew to the relief of the
hero, shall lie but brief. Thanking you
1 lOT NOuI COuLtCSN ann kN'1u icClAAks !
offer you my apologies and regrets
| Then he cen most turned a summerset
lowing, and everybody clapped and
pounded, and the congregation sat down,
and the young man in the tail coat come
fetchin' grandper and Eben to their
seats. EDen was the color Of an egg
plant and grandper was like red flannel
| III Il nd
off and Eben's sleeve was pulled out.
| Come along, gals, SAYS grandper.
Fur nv part | side with your aunt
Bingham and the dominic forevermore.
never seen such carvings on, and don /
want to see such agin. In cut Jackson
Jefferson off with nickel. Ell l did
make mistake he might hev said,
Much obliged fur yer good intentions.
grandper, or I haven't no need of as
sistance, but thank you kindly Instead
Of that he called me an old idjut. Now,
amt no idjut, as he'll find out when my
will is read"
II be-" says Eben, 1.-THE darndest idjut
goin'. 1t was all takin' off, Hammer: but
who wus to know it! It's q massy the
| tramp STdHupeE atteHueu 70 Sot hi7
breath az in or he'd be hung and ME, too,
fur all know, fur helpin' him"
The fat gentleman spoke real pretty
about it," says l. Suppose we sit still
now we know it is takin' off, and see ii
out:'
But they wouldn't, SO We all went.
Jane was in highstrikes, and Hammer
spilled the bottle of lemonade, and the
handkerchief came united. and all the
apples went bobbing up the aisle, and
Jane left the crullers in the seat. But l
kept the peanuts, and handed them
round in the cars, though nobody didn t
seem to enjoy them none. and we ain t
never had no tickets fur the theayter
from jackson jefferson Bingham since,
though his ma says he's comm home to
take place in the store agul and Jane
is beginnin' to critup her hair once more,
and has bought a new plaid dress. and is
maxim it quite cheerful. Mary Kyle
Dallas in Fireside Companion.