Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1890-03-03

An, Lawd,' sighed the old man. the
end amt no nearer in sight than it was
at fust Judy, fetch out the Jug" he
added, as the preacher said something
in an undertone. Now. boys" he con-
tinued. when the jug had been brought
hep yo'selves."
The boys being mighty partial toward
liquor, began to help themselves. The
old mar took few pulls and the parson
dampened his quicker. but the boys drank
recklessly. and after while they were
generously intoxicated.
JOB" said Mark, I'm the best friend
you ever had. You may have judy"
Mark" Job responded, You amt no
better friend to lie than ! am to you, 70
you take her"
Wont do it; you've got to take her. I"
mo; you've got to-"
Now. we can call on the parson to
decide" the old man delightfully."- ex-
claimed.
That's what we can" said Mark. Par
son, you pick out one Of us to be the hus-
band of Judy. here, an l want to say
right here that Jobs my friend, an that
if you decide agin' him I'll larrup you till
you'd run through a sitter"
"Parson, I'm in favor Of your maxim .
decision" Job declared; land l am will
lin to leave it to your Judgment; but let
me tell you right now, parson, if you de-
eide agin' Mark I'll whale you till all that
is left of you would ooze through q tow
sack"
Gentlemen" said the preacher, las I
Just now remarked, am not at all dis
pleased with my circuit l am attached
to my ninety-eight linsey shirts, and have
become smitten with my calico handker-
chiefs. shall make no decision
Mark and Job began to stretch them
selves on the floor. Let them sleep,
said the old man. 'Ho, me-" he sighed
II don't see no way outen this trouble"
II do" the preacher answered; step
outdoors with me-"
When they returned the old man said:
Judy, a decision has been made You
must marry the preacher. Hold on, now
don't fly off He'd do better by you than
any one of the boys. Why, jest think.
he's got calico handkerchiefs enough to
make more bedquilts than you could
stuff into a hired mans appetite, and
every woman in the community would
be-
"Petrified with envy" the parson sus-
gested.
An expression Of delighted resignation
shone on the girls face.
Il will make out the license and do
the marvin myself" said the old man.
80 don't lie skeered now; I'll fix the
boys all right"
Mark awoke, and getting up. aroused
job Squire" said Mark, 1--WE got .
little too much Of your ticker Where
did you get it?''
THAT preacher that WAS here sent II
to me the other day."
wall, he knows what strong ticker
is: don't he. Job"
That's whut he do, Mark" Job added;
Il don't know how we air goin' to fix up
this love business"
"Neither do l. Where's Judyy'
Its well you may ask whar she IL,
when you driv' her off in that way" an
swered the old man.
"Who driv' her OFF, job exclaimed.
"Why, you and Mark thar, when beg
ged you not to drink SO much, but you
didn't pay no attention to me. You swors
both of you--that eff didn't stand up
here and marry Judy to the preacher
you'd kill all OF us, and Jest had to do
it, and then you driv' the bride and groom
away, and you ought to be ashamed Of
yo'selves.
Mark and Job remained silent, sitting
over the fire for an hour at least, and
then Marx. looking up. said:
JOB, don't believe there's but one
bigger fool than am"
"Who's that, Mark"
Both of us together"
You are right, Mark. Spozen We
saunter on down yander an fall often
the bluff. Courier journal.