The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1890-10-23
MISCELLANEOUS.

Mu1ligan-'',rake some 81 the ,nedi.
cine, Mary Ann. The doctor said Il
Woiild aythef kilt6r cure without fail. u
Mira. Mulligan-''Arrah, but which will
lido MATHEMATICS:
1T is said that thirty new ene-doiiaf
bills weigh as much as q twenty-dollar
gold piece: Any cae who can get hold
OF $50 at one time can easily ascertain
the truth OF the above statement.
~ trust" said the love-lorn young
man. "tbat the poem sent you touched
you. even If only very little" 1T
did, 1t did," she mu1mured; II made
curl papers with it."-Washington Post.
"A farmer near Los Angeles has
forty-seven acres Of corn and is willing
to wager that 10000 of the stalks are
twenty-five feet high, which is higher
than q man on horseback can reach.
He expects a crop of $50 bushels to the
acre. 15' 800
in June and July, when the seals
are congregated at the rookeries and a
mother seal has given birth to her pup,
the animal must 60 fifty miles for her
food. The visit is to the fishing banks,
and the seal swims it in about an hour.
-Benevoleht but Near-sighted Elm.
p1oyer-''Patrick, what's that Under
your coat?" Pat (who is working the
growler)-''I'm sorry to say it is a can,
sir" Employer-''Great heavens, Pat:
rick! Stop work and go straight to the
Observation-Disclosures Weekly.
Nathaniel Bailey's English Die.
tionary," published in 1921, contains
the word Observation-Disclosures the
definition being ''honorableness." That
knocks completely out that familiar
breath tester of the old-fashioned spell.
ing schools-incomprehensibility."
Two boys while hunting recently in
Ojai Valley, CAL, were freed by big
bear, which kept them on their uncom.
Portable perch for eighteen hours, de.
vouring all their provisions in the
meantime. An old hunter came along
and raised tho siege with bullet.
Mrs. Livermore says that her hus
band is Republican, while she is Pro
hibitionist; he is a protectionist, while
she is free trader; he has pew in one
church and she in another; he has one
doctor, she another; and yet they are
happy and harmonious and never dream
ofQuarreling.
1t is not generally known that a
single mouse turned loose in a grocery
window will catch more flies in single
evening than fly paper catches all day.
And, besides, he eats them and don't
leave them lying around loose. Don't
grudge the mouse his little mischief; he
is good fly and roach exterminator.
The romance of diamond mining is
all gone. 1t is now matter of excavat-
ing vast beds of blue clay by machinery,
washing it and sitting out the diamonds,
which, after being roughly sorted for
size, are sold in bulk by weight. The
men who do the actual work are mere
laborers, and their pay is proportion.
ately small.-Boston Post. :-r.;
First Auditor-"Who is that mar
sitting in the box over there?" Second
.Auditor-''He is the author of this
comedy" First Auditor - ''Well, l
should think he would have better taste
than to laugh so uproariously." Second
Auditor-"O, it's all right He is the
author of the play, but he never heard
those jokes before. Those were put in
by the comedians"
The wholesale destruction of forests
in this country is attracting atten ton
in Germany, and it is predicted that we
shall in few years lie impoverished in
tree property. A striking comparison
Is made of the two countries. While
the United States has but II per cent. OF
Its area covered by forests, the Empire
OF Germany has 26 per cent of its en-
tire area so covered.
First Criminal-"Hello! jim; how
did you you get out of jail?" Second
Criminal-''I filed a bar and let myself
out ct a window" First Criminal
but how about your striped clothes?'
Second Criminal-''O, that was all right
The Jail isn't far from bathing resort,
and as soon as got down to the beach
was all right. They took my convict
rig for bathing suit. "-America.
The fall of William Hanlon, the
acrobat, seems as nothing in comparison
with that of George Holloway. of New
Albany. Ind. He was sent to the top of
the large brick chimney, ninety-five
feet high, at the glass works, to tear
down the structure. Hardly had he
reached the top when he slipped and
fell into the stack, and ricochetting
from side to side struck the bottom
without scratch. He was at work
again in an hour.
There is young lady in SAM.
tarium at Clinton Springs. N. Y, who
has become such"a slave to chocolate
candy that all the shopkeepers for miles
around have been notified not to sell
her any. She has eaten so much of il
that her skin has become the color OF
chocolate. Recently by piece of de-.
ception, she was able to get two pounds
OF the candy from confectioner's and
ate it all at one sitting. She was seri.
ously i'll for while, but is again ready
for more chocolate.
Hard days are coming for those who
love to crack and MUNICH the savory pea.
nut, and the small boy especially can
prepare for misory, for the price of the
peanut is moving skyward. The high
price is due. it is said, to the short crops
of last year and the year before. The
best grade of Virginia hand-picked
peanuts is now selling at 81 cents a
pound, and it is stated by dealers that
soon the price will be 10 cents "a pound.
The peanuts coming to this market are
mostly from Virginia. The Virginia
nut is medium-sized, with well-detined
and pleasant flavor. Tho North Caro-
lima nuts are smaller than the Virginia,
but have about the same kind of inside
shell.-N. Y. Tines
-. HOPS AND INSECTS.
Why English Farmers Hail tho Advent Of
tho Ladybird with Delight.