The Telegraph-courier. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1888-1946, 1890-07-24
HUSBANDS AND WIVES.
BY ELLA WHEELER WILCOX.


Is is my constantly increasing con-
viction that, after the marriage vows
are taken, two-thirds of the power
necessary to the creation Of an endur-
ingly happy home lies with the wife.
It therefore follows that two-thirds of
the fault is hers where the home be-
comes a failure.
I would classify the failures Of wives
in their duties as follows:
/. Those who lack liberality of mind !;
2. Those who complain and find fault );
3. Those who are selfshly wasteful
and extravagant; 4. Those who are
petty tyrants and "naggers;" 5. Those
who lack tact
Now, if a wife has love, patience,
good temper, beauty and accomplish
ments, yet any one of those five faults
above mentioned may serve to ruin her
home and make her husband wish he
was single again" A wife's love
should be as liberal as the love of God
She should study the daily habits of
her lover before she marries him, and
then she should allow his life to run as
nearly as it is possible in those old
channels of pleasure without trespass-
ing upon the honor or purity of the
new relation If you marry man
who has had life filled with firta-
tons, clubs, cards and races, do not
demand of him the sacrifice of any
thing but his firtations. That you
have the right to demand, but leave
him his clubs and races, with no more
restriction than he felt before marriage.
Add to those pleasures which he has
so long enjoyed the happiness of a per-
fectly ordered home, and the sweetest
and most loving welcome when he re-
turns to you that it is possible for a
man to receive No matter if you are
obliged to pass good many lonely
hours to cultivate this hberality, it
will repay you ere long. Eight mer.
out of ten will appreciate this spirit
of generosity. and will in return plan
for the comfort and pleasure of the
wife.
It is foolish to expect a husband, who
has entire access to his wife's society,
to make the same sacrifices to be with
her for an evening that the lover makes,
who is only admitted to the loved ones
presence for an hour. 1t is no lndlca-
ton of any lessening of love if he some
times goes out and leaves her, at home.
A jewel may be very precious to us,
even if we do not always wish to wear
it in sight and gaze upon its brllllancy.
Some women seem to marry with the
idea that wife" means "interferer. ;"
They set themselves TO work at once to
.revolutionize the mans whole life, and
demand attentions which, if they ex-
ercised little gentle patience, would
be gladly given. I have seen wives
who laid plans for almost every hour of
their husbands leisure time. Now, no
man likes this. It is natural for them
to be the planners and directors, and
the wife who in all ways strives to ca
ter to her husbands tastes and comforts
will find him planning for her happi-
of any feeling quicker than to see that
his wife yields her wishes to his, and
gives up with ready sweetness in small
matters. Pay attention to any wish of
his, no matter how trivial and foolish
it may seem to you, and respond to his
requests cheerfully, not sullenlv, and
in little while you shall find him the
most reasonable and thoughtful of men.
OF course am not writing of brutes or
DULLES, but of men with hearts and
heads.
The woman who saves up her house
hold worries and her bodily pains and
aches to entertain husband with on
his return home, drives a sure nail in
the coffin of conjugal happiness.
True marriage means subjugation
of self, and losing of ones selfish feel
ings in love for another. Every man
ought to have the certainty that he can
find peace and rest from all strife and
fret in his home. Every husband ought
to feel when he turns the key to enter
his own door that he is sure of sweet
er welcome and more cheerful and
restful atmosphere than he has found
outside of it. If each wife would make
this the leading resolve of her life, the
world would be revolutionized.
Trr11 TIL Il