The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1890-09-20
ow, taen said IA thss q

ow, I'd TINT
g he approached the tened D
on the terrace, i've sent your 7brothsrs
81 to Chicago Il \ do not knos I.
selected Chicago as 8 place where ones
would 20 on honeymoon. But I'm nos5
very good at it Now, il you will ~ ~
troduce me I'll see Whist can be done
toward getting you two babes out q tns5 &
| woods"
Standish said: .'Miss Cambridge. this
| is Mr.. Cortlandt Van Bibber, OF whom
you have heard my brother speak, I and
Miss mbridge said she was very glad
to meet Mr.. Van Bibber even under
such peculiarly trying oircnmstance s.
Snow, what you two want to do.
said Van Bibber, addressing them -
though they were just about fifteen
wears old and he was at least forty, rs
to give this thing all the publicity you
can"
"What?" chorused the two runawayA
in violent protest.
''Cersainly," said Van Bibber: ''you
were about to make fatal mistake
You were about to go to some unknown
| clergyman, OF an unknown parish, who
would have married you in back room
| without certificate or witness, just
| like any clipping farmers daughter ana
a lightning rod agent Now, it's diff
ferent with you two. Why you were
! not married respectfully sin church,
| don't know; but kind Providence has
sent mo to see that there is no talk or
| scandal, which is such bad form, and
| which would have got your names Ia
| all the society papers am going TO
arrange this wedding properly, and you
will kindly remain here until send
! carriage for you. Now, just rely on nae
| and eat your luncheon calmly. Allow
nae to recommend the salad, which 10
! especially good"
Van Bibber first drove madly to the
Little Church Around the Corner,
where he told the kind old rector all
about it, and arranged to have the
| church open and the assistant organist
| in her place, and district messenger
| boy to blow the bellows, at three
| o'clock. ''Now,'' be said, II must get
some names. It doesn't matter much
| whether they happen to know the high
contracting parties or not, but they
| must be names that everybody knows.
Whoever is in town will be lunching at
! Delmonico's and the men will be at the
| club" SO he just went to the big res.
| taurant, where, as good luck would
| have it, he found Mrs. 'Regy" Van
Arnt and Mrs Jack Parrish and this
Misses Brooklino, who were just off the
Yacht Minerva, OF the Boston Yacht
| Club, and he swore them to secrecy and
| told them about it,
! At the club he pressed four men into
service who knew everybody and whom
! everybody knew, and when they pro-
| tested that they had not been properly
| invited and that they knew only the
bride and groom by sight, he told them
that made no difference, as it was their
! names only he wanted. Then he sent
| messenger-boy to get the biggest suite
| Of rooms on the Fall River boat and
| another one for flowers, and then he put
Mrs. Regy Van Arnt into cab and sent
| her after the bride, and, as best man, he
| got into another cab and carried off the
| groom.
| 81 have acted as best man or usher
| forty-two times now,' said Van Bibbsr.
as they drove to the church, land this
| is the first time I ever appeared in
either capacity in Russia-leather shoes
! and blue-serge yachting suit. But
| them" he added, contentedly, "Tm
nothing to the other fellows. One OF
| them is in st-iped-hannel suit"
! Mrs. "Regy' and Miss Cambridge
| wept great deal on the way uptown,
! but the bride was all smiles and bushes
| when she walked up the aisle to meet
her prospective husband. They all
f, shook hands after it was over, and the
assistant-organist played the wedding
| March," and one of the clnb.nen in.
sisted in pulling Il cheerful and jerky
| neal ON the church bell in the absence.
| of the ianitor, and then Van Bibbe1
buried an old shoe and handful Of rice
| which he had thoughtfully collected
from the cook at the club--after them
! as they drove off to the boat
| "Now," said Van Bibber, ''when that
| Is printed in the papers tomorrow, It
!! will read Like one Of the most orthodox
and swagger weddings of the season.
But still can not help thinking
| ''Well?" said Mrs. "Regy," as hs
| paused doubtfully.
"Well, l can't help thinking" con-
| tinued Van Bibber, ''of Standish racing
around Chicago with the thermometer
| at one hundred and two in the shade,
and of our meeting when he gets back.
1t will be feverish--very feverish.
Wish l had sent him to Jersey City only.
| It Just shows that a man who is NOT
practiced in lying should leave it alone"
IN. Y, Sun.
Queer Facts About Goldfish.
! Goldfish that swim in globes OF water
in our parlors are very sensible to
changes in the weather, and an observ'
ant person may learn to rely on thona to
! foretell the coming of storm. At such