St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1890-08-03

N III Ol UuC WOIlu dllu
~ the simple, honest
expounder Of common sense. All OF
these have said their say, all Of them sc
were the subject less vital one, il
might well be called threadbare.
There are, however, so many sides to
the question that there is always some
thing more to be said about it on one
head OF another.
There is no hard-and-fast rule that
can be given to secure happy mar
rage. Who has not seen the most un-
likely matches, which have proved
wonderfully happy? Even the old saw,
Youth and Grabbed age
Cannot dwell together,
is proven false now and then, There
are notable instances of the happieSt
unions between June and January, and
[ have known some when the wife was
many years the elder. If we can give
no rule to insure successful welded
life, there is one that we can give which
will not often fail to insure the reverse.
Where the balance of the power is III
the hands of the intellectually inferior,
trouble is very sure to enSue.
AS an instance, take the case-tO
which there are many parallelS-0f a
woman of sensitive nature, who is by
descent and education progressively in
tellectual, mated with a. man who is far
behind her in quality and capacity of
brain, but who is endowed with mas
sive unreasoning will. and who is mate.
rally the master of the situation, pos
sessed OF fortune, while his wife is
dowerless. He is not intelligent enough
to realize the unlmpOrtauce (between
l., iEal Of fhar
ton; everything that she receives
comes in the form of gift from him tc
her. He gives her every new dress
every jewel,
Every Knick-Knack
she possesses, and yet never lets hel
feel that anything is hers in her own
right, but that they are held as a vassa
holds his goods in fealty from his lord
He would be the custodian not only OF
| her person and possessions, but of Ell
mind as we'll. She must not read the
| books of such a writer nor hear the
teaching of such master; she must moi
| think their thoughts, she must not hold
their doctrines. What he believes,
what his mother believed. it is fitting
| 1t the wife finds it, on the whole. easier
to yield outward complaisance, while
at heart she rebels against having her
mind compressed, like a Chinese
woman'S foot, she leads double life.
Externally passivelY submissive, in
reality defiant and disobedient-this
| means deceit and deceit means unhap-
piness, gradual growing apart, cool
| ness which too often hardens into aver
| sion. On the other hand, if the wife
have high spirit and will not stoop to
| tacit lie, we have open warfare, the
| saddest, the most terrible of all strife.
| She refuses to measure life by his
| small standards; she insists upon heI
| rights of free and independent thought;
she is willing to obey aud serve him fol
| three-and-twenty hours out of the dav
but she claims the twenty-fourth fol
the freedom of her own soul-he denies
| the claim; nothing but miracle can
save them. The miracle is Otter
wrought; through love the eyes of the
blind are opened and the ears of the
! deaf unstopped. But miracles do not
happen every day.
Who does not know the unequal mar
| riage between brilliant intellectual
| man of a gentle nature, married to {
| woman who is his inferior intellectually
and socially? She cannot think his
thoughts, she cannot speak his speech,
| she is
| Horribly Jealous
of those who can, she lsolates him from
his peers. Through his own gentleness
! and sweetness shs rObs him of his birth
right, of the companionship and in
| Spiration of his equals and her Supe
riors. He either rebels, throws off the
despotic yoke, and seeks in her despite
| int hn nnnHc on6 Ina hnI
| alone, Soured and injured, or else sub
mits patiently, denies himself the sym
pathy he could find in the world out
| side, and tries to content himself with
her conversation and companionship
| He was born with strong wings like al
eagles. but he is mated to wren, anC
must flap his pinions sadly beside hi:
| tiny companion. His flight is not to
| ward the sun, but through a dusty sub
urban grove.
Another fruitful cause of unhappi
ness is the total lack of sympathy which
| we so often find between the tastes o
| man and wife. Where one is very de
| pendent for his or her happiness upor
| the excitement of city life, and the othe
| only knows contentment in the quiet o
the country, some ones tastes must bt
sacrificed, and both are likely to have
an uncomfortable time of it, unless ont
of the pair is willing to find happiness
in the happiness of his OF her partner
The Irishman whose statement tina
"One man is as good as another" wa
amended by his friends saying, Yes
and better. too" was surely citizen o
New ireland. The sentiment of equalit.
is so universal III our country that the
very term marrying beneath ones sta
fioy, :, xUbioh 9 en- aAm,nnn in EDUlqnh
is only used with us by very conserva
tive people; and yet, ignore it as WI
| will, there is system of caste among III
which is as memorable in its laws as tht
caste of the old world, with one grea
and notable difference. With us tht
ranks are always open; gentle manner
and true desire to belong to the bes
| people are the simple watchwords which
| open the gates of the best society ii
| America. Not the smart society, no
the gay set, nor the most fashionable
/ world, but the smaller, more eXclusiv,
| circle of people who love the really go0t
things of life. For girl bred i'll thu
best society of high thought and gentl,
manners, a marriage with a man of al
inferior position is sad fate. Love is
great reconciler of differences, blu
it must be a very true and strong low
which can equdllZe Tile tastes OF MAI
who at sixteen is put into counting
house, and from that time on learn
nothing but how to make money and
girl who has been
Bred to Love tlae Arts.
to think, to study, to reach ever up
ward toward higher plane of life.
How many marriages have we seel
turn out the most lamentable failure
| from this inequality, the only seriou