The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1890-01-19
Fascination is Not Love.

The other day | received a letter from one
of the many daughters Of Eve, which con-
tanned the following paragraph: "Dear
EDITOR want to know if there is any
such thing as love. Now please to take
notice, want you to publish this; am
not telling you my wants in private way,
for then you might think have intentions
which have not, because l do not know
but what you are woman, but what's the
use of giving an editor reason!
''What is Iove! We shall bar out diction-
aries. have always had an idea that it is
something once living, lived as long as we
did, and, in discussing this | wish to take
only the period of life, extending from the
time one reaches the years Of discretion
until five years after ones marriage. All
other loves are born in one, or are the re-
suit of long association. Does love exist
during the period | mention"'
Our young people grow up with the idea
that it does: that there is some one with
whom they will ''fall in love;n therefore
they are, it may be unconsciously, on the
lookout for what they deem the signs
within them which prove, to their own
satisfaction, that such an one is known TO
them The signs, if they but knew 1t, are
only the response of a handsome face or
the obedience to stronger mind than
their own.
This feeling, which we shall call love,
g generally results in marriage, and then
who dare tell them they have not been nor
are not in love! They float above tins
hard world, and floating is so pleasant Ii
a rock shows itself or makes itself felt
ever so slightly, the love bids defiance and
and for a time they float little higher.
This love is thoughtful, kind, obedient.
compassionate, tender, conSiderate and
everything else so pleasant to one, but
alasi alas! there comes an hour when the
bright fire in the CRATE darts out wicked
little fame, swapping fooled" when the
wind dismally bowls ''fooled;" when the
dog looks with sad eyes into your lace
saving ~ am sorry, but you are fooled
Even the clock seems to measure off, oh
so evenly. fooled, fooled" There seems
stiffness in the house: something is dead
and you know 1t is.
Humanity does not like to be fooled
The worse it is fooled the more it will try
to hide it. A wife, finding her husband un
congenial, will kill him, kill herself, oil
yorce him, run away or make the best Of
it.n To kill him would likely involve hel
in a somewhat similar death. That, anC
killing herself woman naturally shrink:
from: therefore she keeps these two alter
native till the last. To divorce him is al
most impossible in Canada, and is looked
on as a sor0 of disgrace almost equal II
running away: therefore we may elias:
these four az desperate means.
The Way Juous III most respectable IN tnt
nineteenth century is to make the bes
CT it.
Let some of the thousands of wives who
are making the best of it candidly tel VIVA
it means. Poor creatures, they hardly
know what another experience would fee
like. So many people have no character
BY their lives they say: II was porn U
live and die, let what is to be come along.
They do not know the great truth tina
what is to be will be unless they make al
effort to bring about realization OF thel
own ideas of what should be. Happy mar
ried life is no proof that love existed be
fore marriage. The Honess has a love 10
the lion.
Marriage is never the result of love, bu
rather the desire of wealth or position
fear of old maidenhood, necessity, the prey
alent idea that marriage is the usual, Gus
tomary, proper thing to do, expected OF 20
nv the world, as it were, and that sent
mentality, widespread and most danger
ous. falsely called love. do not say that
marriage founded on any of these will tur
ont unfortunate. This world is almos
equally divided between happy and III
happv exceptions, but if girls but kne1
that GnlS love Is d UlluS W OC oPNihON
loathed and avoided as if it were som
dread disease, if they recognized it as
form of insanity, we would have MOI
happy. healthy looking households in GU
land. People in this age laugh at Jaco
being engaged seven years to Rachae
They believe in short engagements, and th
result is so usual it has ceased to be wo1
dered at-a man ard woman agreeabl
when circumstances are very favorable
cold. ouarrelsome, or sarcastic general.
the children, if any, in about the same lat
tude and longitude as their parents.
Different causes can be brought forwar
for this great evil-the belief that love eS
lists before marriage-the evil effects {
which are boundless. 1t is harder reno
ing cause than giving a cure. A long el
gagement is very efficient.
/ should like to have some other opinion
on this topic. / wish to say in closing:
do not discourage marriage, nor yet Low
but | maintain that happy married life ca
best be attained by long and careful stuc
OF each others habits and nature, and ma
riage will always be very liable to fail ;
long as its foundation is built of a beautif
and crazy idea called love.
Six O'Clock Tea.