Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1890-04-05
THE OLD LADY's DUCK.
And How It Scared Young Man
Into Swearing off,"

A very funny seens occurred on q
Chicago sheesear recently. 1he News
Of that city saws:
At one of the down town s'rre.s
young man got on. rni selsctiI & 4 con-
Portable seat, took out his evening pa
Ter aud began to rad. He was a youth
who bad an A No. I opinion Of himself.
and didn' I care Who knew IT, He vAs
supremely satisdel with ihs existing
condition Of things. and his soul was
sites ped IN serenity.
At one OF the CT ss strfets Wun,an
curying live duck In a bTosn paper
package GOT on the Gar. There we're
feveral vacant seats, but. as fa,e direct
ed, the woman sas down b siie the
young man. When tie a began 10
bowl along again, and the bird z I use
to the motion, il proc, eded b 'ssize up
the surrounding objects. aft r Il had
satisfied it, curiosity. II turrei lis q.
tention to the Young man. Thre VA
n nj, ce Of white thread on n e hiter'-
coat sleeve The duck raw itsntn.a e
meditat We peck at It Tie Young
man didn't notice this, bit every one
else in the EAR Il Il ard tao q rs
N the opposite seat sDrkered. Every
BODY was ANXIOUS to see what tie
duck would do next. Not su CO ding
in mailing tie mprssi al the frt shot
the creature triei Il acan. Just then
the young fellow uncons iously moved
his arm. The duck uttered loud quark
OF disappointment and disapproval The
youth heard the shout which gre ted
this act on the part OF the du k, aud,
1ra - Ill g..
tened upon him he fin ly turned to
his paper and tried 70 appear as if he
were not conscious Of the presence of
the bird which had thus disturbed his
eqr animity. For possibly five minutes
he managed to keep his attention riyet-
ell upon his pare, but by and by he
began to lie affected with burning de-
sire to know what the duck was d leg.
He could hear the passengers laughing
convulsiyeiy, and every now and then
the cultural outlaw Of a coarse-min2el
man smote upon his ear. The unhappy
victim tried to quell his rising desire,
but ma ure finally asserted itself and he
looked down at the fowl. Tie lat er
was gazing up into his eyes with cold,
fishy glare that was pc sitiy ely horrifying
in its intensity and grotesqueness. With
gasp OF despair and mental anguish
the youth got up and went out en- the
platform, aiming the door behind him.
Say" sad the young fellow to the
conductor, ''isn't there sn ordinance
which prohibits the transportation of
live stock on the street cars
"Whys" asked the knight of the
punchec.
because I though it m ght possibly
include that duck in there"
Now, the conductor was n good deal
of wag, and 50, tipping the wink to
the b. ISLANDERS, ask d:
''What ducki"
'You don't mean to say you don't Sc
the duck that old woman is carrying in
a brown paper pTcets I"
Ger My, don't see it, said the
conductor, ''because there amt duck
or an old woman in the car.
Here he appealed to the bystanders,
who, each and everyone of them, sol
emily upheld the cen 1uctor in his
statement,
The yor NJ mans face he ane eshy
pale, Cir at beads OF swt at stood upon
his brow, aud his knees smote tog or.
"Boys," lie whispered hoarsely, Il feel
that you are right bat ] hope | may
die if / don't see in the CIR this Diesel
moment an old woman with duck in
her lap. Boys, last night with sed the
last oyster supper which / shall ever
attend. have laughed Of t warnings
of friends, and | am TOW lelping the
fruits of my folly You are now looking
at reformed man. get off here.
Good night.
The reclaimed youth faded into tho
darkness, and above the roaring of the
pas sengers could be heard the wild, tri-
umphant sqnawk of the duck as the car
ioltsd round the corner.