St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1890-12-21
His Strength Was Useless,

i"But I don't believe he's a straight teach
err said David Compton, addressing his
wife.
David Compton weighed 500 pounds.
However, he was not a fiabby dime museum
freak. He was the strongest man in the
county, perhaps in the state. He stood up
as well proportioned as any other man who
weighed one-half less. When big David
went into butchers shop. threw a ham on
to The block and slapped it with hand al
most the duplicate of the ham, glass ratified
n the windows and big quarters of beef
swung uneasly on their hooks. One day he
cufed q mule OH the nigh flank to make it
stand over, and almost paralyzed the beast
And when it drew UP its Off foot to swat him.
David seized it, and the mule dislocated its
leg trying to pull away from him. Yes, David
was mighty man of muscle. yet as gentle as
child. In his strength lay his weak
ness, He was afraid of himself.
Though he was law-abiding farmer,
he had very human temper But he would
as soon think of attacking man with an AK
as of striking him with his fist. So David
would stand around and wrangle over poll
ties. and get mad, and some little, insig-
niticant shrimp who knew him would sass
back, and cuss him, and flourish his fist in
Big David's face, until the giant would fairly
cry, and sneak into the house, go down
cellar and swing full barrels of pork around
his head like Indian clubs, to ease himself
Off
what makes you think the teacher amt
straight?" asked David's wife. 'sYou air one
of Their school board
He don't talk proper. 1 amt overly ed
dicated, but he don't sunni ow swing Their
English languidge like er man Nv his cloth
orter, an as fer his marryin Mirandy, dunn
me eff he shall do it,
''But he's got er certificate frum Their SUPER
in tender
YES know he's got er teachin' 'stidicate,
but twtxt you an me, Lydia, theirs some
thin crooked in it. Dunn his picter; he's COM
in now'
The Objectionable pedagogue was creeping
cat-like along the walk toward the house.
Big David received him with scowl.
''Mr. Peters," said David attacking the
enemy boldly. My wife tells me you want er
marry our darter''
Il trust hit would be agreeable-like all
round.''
Your intentions is strictly honest?''
81 would marry her in propria persona"
Yer got tibet word outen Their back Nv Their
dictionary"
''What words
Properly persony."
Excuse me, but
''Dayid. bless me, here comes Their county
superintender" said Mrs. Compton.
The trio looked out on the graveled walk
and Mr.. Peters. with scared face, collapsed
in a chair.
i9o"Howdy do, SIR said David blandly shy
swife, Mrs. Compton an of course you know
mir. Peters?''
a 81 have not the HONOR replied the super
zintendent
ID Didn't you examine him fer er stiff
cater"
y, II examined a much younger man named
Peters, but not this gentleman. If he has
one it was obtained fraudulently."
jne' Great gosh, hold me, LYDIA Hold me,
Mr. Superintendent boiled David. 'Git er
rope i'll Their woodshed an tie me hand an
futl Set on me, everybuddy, an kiyer me
up with furniture!'
The alleged Peters cleared the room at a
single leap and scuttled down the roadway,
while Mrs. Compton and the superintendent
did more by persuasion than by wrestling
with David.
81 knowed it, ] knowed itl' he howled.
wringing his big hands in utter helpless
ness, Il knowed by his languidge he war
crooked. told We so. Lydia: / saw that he
didn't use the languidge proper. An nowI
must STAN still an see him lite out without
doin' nothin' TO him all erlong because I'm
SO strengthy. But by hockey. exposed his
eddication an saved our darter."