The Forrest City times., 1890-08-30
A ring on the finger is worth two in he pawnshop. Boston Herald


 DeHvcr Road.
 Mrs. Rceder-"T see by the papers that there has been rebellion in the deaf and dumb asylum" Mir. Reeder Not rebellion, my dear; mutiny." Puck.
 Lady Doctor (young and fsir)- "Please turn your head little. :" Masculine Paticnt--''Ah! dear. you have already turned it. - Laurence American.
 Parish is very much in love with that girl" "Why doesn't he marry herr" He has his misgivings as to whether she is able to support him. "- N + Sun.
 It has been discovered that kisses love kisses, we mcan-are full. of cleo tricity. Now we know why old maids have always called kissing shocking!-- Boston Courier.
 II am something of wit myself at times" said stupid man to a wag. Just as bright man has an occa- sional dull period" was the reply 7eras lsytings
 Cumso-.'I see that Denver de- tective has mysteriously disappeared " Fangle ''He's probably found the criminal he was looking for and the shock killed him. n-Epoch.
 Teacher Now. my children, we will parse the sentence, John refused the pie Tommy Jones' what is Johno" Tommy-''A darned fool."-- Biaqhamton Leaaer.
 Mir. Figg "If you were out In . boat with your wife and sister and the boat should upset. which one would you saveP" Mir. Hogg Myself. - 1errc Haute Express
 He-"Perhaps you won't believe me, but never laugh at an inferior She -''Of course l believe you. It would be irr possible for you to do such a thing. "- BoStoa Transcript.
 Mrs. Merriit-.'I hear your husband fell on the ice and broke his leg. That Was dreadfully unlucky." Mrs. Giles -'I should say it was. He fell on our own sidewalk. " The Epoch. Mrs. Humphrey Wards eldes, son, Ar. mold. who is only fourteen years old. is said
 
 an essay 10 a magazine and received l; check for 50 and a lettor of thanks
 The present British rage for frs, editions has brought up tho prices One hundred and flTty dollars were given latel, for tho original edition of Sketches by Boz with Cruikshank's illustrations
 The statement Is made that at lcas, seventy letters day miscarry because of the similarity Of the names Of Oswero and oweSo-cities in the State Of New York For lhis reason each town wants the other to change its nail.
 The largest steam derrick in the world is used by shipping company a. Ham. burg. Germany. It is kspt at tho docks and used in lifting immense weights on and off shipboird. IL can pick up ten " hceie locomotive with perfect ease.
 A novel way Of raising money to build n church has been adopted by acongregation ia an Iowa town. They borrowed sia0, 0o1 and gave life in urance on number of the members, which is to bs applied on Inc debt as fast as death ensues
 Charles r. Wright, who last August sho. and killed Sheriff Marshall and Deputy
 
 papers Of attachlnsnt at Bensonia, Mich., WAS found guilty of murder and will bc sentenced to life imprisonment
 There is craze in London for auecr leathor Some shops are stocked with fancy articles made from tho skins of all sorts of beasts, reptiles and fishes, inelud. ing pelican ssias, lion and panther skins, fish skins, monkey skins and snako skins, etc
 use in mines to indicate the presence of fire damp, or in gas mains to indicate tho e,cape Of gas The invention ts based up. on the property certain metals havo ol evolving heat iu the presence of hydro gen gas
 There is cry of fear In Paris lest dano ing may be forced out of fashion. One reason assigned is that women with salons uo longer encourage 1t Another is that the waltz, which has for soine years almost monopolixed dancing, is too boisterous and oxhausting.
 One of tho relics placed in ths corner stone of the Confederate Soldlers' Home T, Atlanta Is . spur sent by General Longstrcet It was madc from Union cannon captured at the first battle of Bull throughout tho war.
 Mabcl-''Did you hear that Bessie Willis was married yesterday 10 Tom GuzxlerP" Maud Really | thought she would be the last person to marry him. Mabel Well. she was. wasn't xhe ?" Harrard Lampoon.
 smith-"You do wrong wasting your SAbbaths as you do. Your wife tells me you arc mapping it almost all day. Why don't you go to church as dof' Jones Well, whats the difference, should like to knowP"-- Boston 7ran- script.
 Congressman Cat home. among his constitucnts) -~'Gentlemen and fellow citizens; want you to tell me what. in your opinion. this country most needs" Tho Crowd (with astonishing unanimity) Shorter sessions of Con gresse"-N. '. Weekly.
 Papa its no use talking Emma, these Sunday evening meeting have got to be shortened. My last gas bill was enormous. Emma "Its not my fault It wouldn't be half as big If mamma didn't come into the parlor 90 often. "---B Boston Herald
 Mir. N. Peck--.'Alcxandre Dumas says that anything useless Is danger ous.' What do you think of that dearp" Mrs. N. Peck--"I think he was an old fool who didn't know what he was talking about. There is noth- ing dangerous about you. is there9"
 ''Ars you the man that weads mind" asked Gus Dc Jay of gentle man who had been giving an Sxhibi- ton of his powers in kis pArlors. .'Yes. sir" Would you object to swyinS te wead minep" Not at all. 0rine it along with you any evening. VI HssA- S'stos Ssst.