Morning journal and courier., 1890-07-03
ON LIZ.

Minister-Are you In tho church, Missi
Miss Hiehsee-No, sir; am only a mem
ber of the choir, sir.-Yonkers Statesman.
''She threw me kiss, but didn't get it,"
"Why notf'
sShe didn't throw It straight. -Pittsburs
Dispatch.
There is really no tangible objection to
violent plaid trousers, except shat they keep
one constantly wondering whose move 1t Is.
Washington Post.
"I'll bet with anybody except the police
men,"
"why except themi"
"They might take me up."-Philadelphia
Times.
"My dear Mr. Layman," said the pompous
bishop, show are you getting along with
your new pastor; has the congregation grown
much since his arrivali' "Groan," ex-
claimed the melancholy Mr.. Lsymsp; "yes.
| indeedl"-West Shore.
Getting in on Him.-Grsnd street dry
| goods nabob (who fails TO recognizs his sales
1 girl In her street dress)-"Won't you have
| my seat, madami" The sales girl-"No;
keep It, and give me one az the store for an
hour or two to-morrow."-Puck.
High Priced Doctor-You are now conva-
lescent, and all Jon need Ia exercise. You
should walk ten miles day, air. but your
walking should have an object. Patient
| All right, doctor. I'll travel around trying
to borrow enough to pay your bill.-New
York Weekly.
Cosls to Newcastle. individu-
al-"Bsg pardon, cir, but ! am around ool-
lectiug reading matter for the hospitals. +"
Busy Personage-"0h, they've got plenty of
reading matter, loads of IL. 1t Isn't a month
since sent them q Sunday paper New
York Weekly.
$50 your fiancs Is coming here next week, "
II 49,. II IL kho
am afraid thst our little walks will then be
over" ~ don't know about that" she an
swered slowly. eyes," he said, 81 am
afraid so. You see my fiancs is coming
here, then, too.n-New York Sun.
visitor-"well, Tommy. how are yeu get
ting on at schoolf' Tommy (sgsd sight)-
"First rate. I ain't doing as we'll an som,
other of the boys, though. / can stand or
my head, but have to put my feet sgains,
near the fence at all, and guess can after
hile."-Jewish Messenger.
Old Nanny lived in North Carolina, very
, near the line. When the boundary between
, that state and Virginia was changed, she wa
told that now she lived In Virginia. "Well.
: she answered, "I am powerful glad. 1 al
, ways heard that Virginia was q healthie
state than North Car'lina. a."-Argonaut.
Old Gentleman-Louiss, heard some on
L DelnR klbnou Ouoe OE tWloo III tuo lh1
: night. Was 1t youf
Louise (blushing)-once or twice did 20
| say, papai
Old Gsntleman-Yes.
j Louise-Then IL wasn't I.-Harper's Ba
r gar.
y Mrs. Youngthin9 (wofully)-"Oh, Clal
q ence, would you believe i'll The baby's hsi
!. is turning red" Mr.. Youngthinz-"Wel
u what of III Why do you take It SO to heart
Q Mrs. Youngthing-"Why, just think ho
n dreadful ii will be when we wear our blu
ribbons and sashes to the ball games an
cheer for Yalei Have you lost all respe'
o for your alma materf'-Lawrence American
d One of the justices of the peace was a.
/. pealed to the other day by q woman WI
N wanted warrant for the arrest of her hu
band for not supporting the family. "Why
y she says, she has only brought home tv
y sacks of -four, bushel of potatoes and q CO
= in two weeks. I have said would not Ii,
= with him another day, but as have just g
hen ID seems hard to break mp and leave
q -0wego Times.
n A Businsss-Eyed Girl.-Timpany dswele
I-'Say, Bobby, come here and tell me, Ill
good little boy, If you ever heard your 81
IS ler Gwendelin say anything about me
a tBobby-"Yesterday she said to mamma th
= It would be be good thing for you If y,
10 married her, as then the wedding ring wen
70 cost you nothing, and all her friends won
at buy their presents at your store; and pc
haps you might sell them aftsrward. ."-Je
- eller's Circular.