Telegram-herald., 1890-05-23
20 Il 80 - -

0a-tfsa Overturned
ne Liars' Grub ssss assembled AZ tas
ssss4l glzce, a sIlal.I roon IL LYRIC hzu,
chossn tsr rs4ssns - 0cvio4ls sf.st ex-
plA1sEtoa s nog aeoesszry. TIE zzs
sCose hsd been touched "a Che cixars
kgnfes, and Lhs door koekea 70 ke-o es1t
an yagr4Ilt ceE-scssaEssssls scruple that
Elght come P,SnnS around y disturb
saY member 81 tie c4szs.
The medal. che reward II hfrn 1ho
Should Tel the biggest ~boyper. y be
~orn antli the preceding biggest wh0p-
Per b2i beea out~hopPsd, reposed upon
Tie sre4st n Ens colonel, ~hers X hAd
gLlrtered for ne az ssecsdenEedly bonx
period Il sK months. Il -as haad-
some medal, made q gold eighteen kar-
as me, bearing uPoa the Jns side al
hdeAiLzed head n profile 0f AnanilAs, aud
oa iLs diverse tAis exalted senEimenr
hendaciIy Is the daughter Of invea-
nOG"
The colonel vas proud Of his proves
II the science % which the chb vas do
voted From ia early yoush DC had re-
saTded = good he a. rathsr u Dc chosen
Nst-AA -Ab fAa+-Er- IL 60 NAAAl4k tt4E N+a-
onel pulled lp0n ais cigar with al air Of
supreme seif satisfaction. He had lust
finished telling the most magnificent lis
Of bis life, ~hich ~as. Ia brief that ne
had Onc- told the truts. IL sas a short
he, out ns q. - t,s1ed WITH It Never
tEsi~-r syua Sssaas x disappointment
we're uanLlssfed oy fEls fellow members
They ia ri a good liz a. much as she colo
nel did out they lad. one and all. no
ton that a lie told at the expense Of ones
SELF respect should not De told.
That may Do, cOk0nel." puE In the
major. "anOng ordinary liars. but with
Is it doesn't 70. We all admit that is
hAsnt a grain Of truth Ia IL, but you
~eaken your position among men OF our
standing when you toil a lse OF that sort
Auy nan ~bo yVll adEl.t that he once
told the truth violates one OF the first
principles Il cur As-ociatlon. However.
I. for one, don't believe in rubbing il Ia.
You've held on to the medal for six
months most nObly, and IN view Of your
past record for pure, anadulterated falsi-
hc4tion, Il - my sentiment that the club
should overlook this evenings faux pas.
The man who attempts 20 hold that little
badge of honor which you wear for more
than SIX months has bitten of more than
he can cbew-like the bull heard Of
last week that swallowed a watch when
he was calf.
What bull was it?" said the colonel.
Why, my butcher was telling me
about it. His father once owned little
red bull calf that swallowed the hired
mans vest. with his watch and a silver
dollar IN tit was ten years ago. Last
week the bull was killed, and in cutting
him up they found the money and watch
In the vest pocket intact.
"A fair story that, but nothing wildly
Improbable about It. said the colonel.
If the bull had increased the money at
the rate Of o per cent. per annum. and
had been found With dollar and sixty
sents In his stomach at the end Of ten
yr~r~. We might think something of it.
Well said the major, passing lightly
over this astonishing criticism. that's
all right. but there was one thing re-
rrAArkable about the watch. II WAS going.
and hadn't lost a seconds time in ten
years"
"GOing' The watch was going p cried
the colonel. his face growing pale with
excitement
yes. sir; going" replied the major.
at was a stem winder. and the wheel had
ro< caught between the animals lungs,
~ that every time he breathed he wound
the watch up"
Here, major put in the colonel.
"take The medal and give me your
butcher address
The major bowed. Taking the medal
he pinned 1t upon MS breast with a sweet
smile
''ThuAAerationl- cried the major, sud
denly.
What Is she mattery' queried the
coloDeL
Are you SckI' put in another.
Bring some brandyr' cried a third.
The major u going 70 faint.
'So, I'm not, said the major. with a
gasp. But, boys. look at the medal"
The boys" looked, and 10. AnAnias'
face bad turned green--New York Even
ins SON