The Republican., 1890-07-18

who said thort We were referencin'
to me? never thort O. sctch thing
b'gosh! Thuz more present comp'ny
thin me here th'ts relation O. my rela-
tion. Gender sets Sol Duzenberry. lie
married M'riar's secon' cousin, an dye
'spoSe I'm gointer set still an hev ye
throw impytations on Sol? Not vile |
kin git up an pertest, b'gosh!'
''Wull, said the Squire, good deal
gentler, lis tn any o. your relations S
relation here sides you an Sol?''
mo, tn hain't," replied the Old Set
tier.
''Then, Major" said the Squire, 81
don't mind sayin' to ye th't | didn't
mean Sol"
''All right, 'Squirc!' exclaimed the
Old Settler. Il 'ccpt yer 'pology!"
The Squire and the old Settler shook
hands and sat down, the 'Squire's eyes
twinllling as he winked at the boys
while the Old Settler ordered leetle
sumpin' refreshin' fer all hans.
Major" said the Squire, after
awhile, 81 think ye said spell ago th't
l made charge ag'in ye an wouldn't
stan by it. How'd | make charge
ag'in YEP"
''Wull, Squire" replied the Old
Settler, "speakin' o them high an
curious winds o. your'n, We said th't |
hadn't never heerd O winds ez was ez
high an curious ez them. That were a
charge ag'in me, an a serious one, an
Wen begun to try an git some fac's
outen ye bout them winds o yourn We
drifted to subjects ez was furrin' to the
question, an little unfort'nit.'
''Sech bein' the case, Major" said the
Squire, I'll take back the charge an
asst ye to perceed with yer Examination
O. me ez to wuther them winds O mine,
ez We call 'em, was ekal to sartin things
or wuther they want. ReplYin' to yer
two fust questions now, I'll say th't
none O. them winds O mine ever
dreamt O changin' mans shirt 'thout
him KNOWN of it, and ez fer gittin' up
a bar fight 'mongst the clouds, they
wouldn't ha' had no more idee O. doin
of it thin they would ha' had O takin'
up election fer the heathens in Af-
ferky.''
That's wat / thort, b'goshp' said the
Old Settler. AN now, then, Squire, was
any O them winds O. your'n high an
curious enough in their natur' to hev a
man arrested charged with cattle steal
in'?"
"Never, sir!' replied the Squire, with
the solemnity of witness in court.
"Good?' calculated the Old Settler
Now, sir! Did any O them winds O.
your'n, ever show their height an their
cur'ousness to be setch az to change the
veenoo of Il case in court an save an in
nercent man from perSecution?"
Never answered the Squire.
''Then, Squire" said the Old Settler,
'th'has been winds and harrycanes
durn sight higher and cur'ouser tn n
them O yourn, an I'll prove it to We by
the case of an ANCESTOR O mine who lived
in the Sugar Swamp deestric' at an arly
day. 'Cordin to the dockyments his name
were Hiram Wuncut. l wun't say that
the winds they had in the Sugar Swamp
deestric' in them days was higher an
cur'ouser thin any th't had ever ben
heard on afore, cause it mout be a
charge ag'n somebody, but the family
dockyments says they was, an also
says th't they was uncommon suddent
an contrary in their dispositions.
''If ever tn were a victim O. sarcum-
stances, the dockyments says his name
were Hiram Wuncut. Hiram were a
poor man, but he were ambitious. He
had a clearin' th't were contin' ally bein'
squatted on by bar th't didn't make
no bones O walkin' off with a sheep or a
pig or calf, right afore Hiram Wun-
cuts eyes, an it was the ambition O.
Hiram to lay that bar low. But the
bar were too cunnin' chap fer Hiram,
an he continnered to gether in the liv-
in produce O Hiram's farm an keep
Hiram poor The bar didn't seem to
bother nobody else's sheep nor calves
but Hiram's, an so, vile his neighbor
Philander BoleS KID raise wool enough
to make him nice fiannen shirts an his
calves crowd up inter cows an oxen,
Hiram had to keep on weariE' ruther
used up OF cotton shirts th't had kim
with him wen he landed in sugar
Swamp, an his calves couldn't stay
with him long enough to git to be COWS
nor oxen.
Them winds O. the Sugar Swamp
deestric', so these family dockyments
says, usety come up so suddent th't one
minute yer corn in the garden wouldn't
be shook by ez much ez zephyr, an
the next minute yer house ID be sot
down in the mex township by streak
O. wind. Folks in housen th't was bein'
scooted through the air in one direction
d meet housen from neighborin' dees-
tries passin' along in t'other direction,
them winds run in setch contrary
streaks. Hiram Wuncut alluz said th't
nuthin' tht none O. them winds mowt
do would ever s'prise him not one ioty.
''One afternoon Philander Boles' wife
hung out her wash, an lef it out over
night. 'Mongst the wash were one O
| Philander's fannen shirts. Mex morn
in wen she went out to take in the
wash the fiannen shirt were gone, an
in its place on the line were curious
lookin' cotton shirt. That were as
toundin', but wen Philander found th't
his yoke O steers were gone, long with
his wagon, tn were a time on that
clearin', an no mistake.
Zone O. them tarnal winds must ha'
| ba,, vim hob oo.'iD pirbt, uoid