The Washington critic., 1890-03-23
THE AWFUL poRr1ERE.
A Household Hanging that Keeps Mf
Irnin Yrnnmslng.

from Proposing.
A few evenings ago, says a writer In the
Buffalo Courier said 10 my friend Dareal'
"Joseph, why haven't you marrledF' Inc
question seemed abrupt, | admit, but tue
moment was most propItous. AS we sat
In the cosiest corner OF the club-rOom test
ing q new and Tecomponsing brand OF
cigars, we talked a while at random, and
finally we, too, drifted to the eubiect OF
marriage in Buffalo We spoke of the mp.
parent reluctance of certain young men TO
do anything but dawdle about the object Of
their adoration and when Joseph said, "Do
not blame them; perhaps IL is not their
fault,n put to him the startling question.
"Joseph, Why don't You marryW Joseph
took several long pulls at his cigar before
replying, but finally said, his eyes fixed on
the ascending smoke: "lf you wish TO know
what has kept me from motrlmony VIII
tell you. 1t is the portiereN ! stared.
Joseph went on: "In other words, IL is be-
cause parlors have no doors-because our
modern house is one vast whispering gal
lery. in which the slightest sound is heard
from one end to another. IL Is years siuce
! have felt sure that | was absolutely alone
with girl--an environment necessary for
sentimental demonstrations But to par
ticularize. 1t is not long since ! became uu-
usually interested in young woman Of my
acquaintance Perhaps / was in love with
her. If not, | know that ] might have be-
come So, paid her rather marked attention
for nearly year, but in my numerous visits
| to her house there was never an opportunity
for anything but the most formal CONVERSE
tion. Usually her father sat IN the library
across the hall in full hearlng-if not In
| view-of us. No chance to shut door. At
the parlor door-portieres; at the library
door-porteres; at the diningroom door
| portieres, and never an opportunity for that
| sense Of private tete-a-tete which gives a
man inspiration for sentimental deeds.
"Now, 1t is my idea that the time when
! mutual love is first acknowledged should he
n supreme moment in life-one to be made
the most of, and not to be thrown away by
any such insensate proceedings as propo-
| sal by letter, or even to he rslSed at uupro-
pitious seasons, when interruption is prob
! able or possible. Therefore, did not tell
my love with papa reading his paper in the
| adjoining room, or with the servant fun
bling at the sideboard in the dining-room,
with only thickness of a curtain between
her and us. | did not tell my love while
all the doors were wide open and the sisters
were active in the upper halls, and could
hear the brother in his room overhead
dressing to 90 out. No; ] waited for some
moment of assured privacy. 1t tnever came"
There was q long silence. "Well?'
said at last. "That is all. Last summer
| the young woman in question made visit
to a provincial town where she could shut
the parlor door. While there she became
engaged, and was married last autumn"
"And that is courtship as she is conducted
in Buffalo, 1 sighed. "rhat is the state
of things in nine houses out of ten where
l pay social visits" said Joseph Dareal
And as | recalled the houses of our we'd
able but unwedded maids l concluded that
Joseph was not wrong, and that what IL
most needed by our young men is not cour
age, but ga chance.n