The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1890-09-20
PuNcENT PARAGRAPHS.

"A mountain OF alaDaSter lS SuppoSeu
TO have been discovered 150 miles north
OF Denver, Col
First tClerk-"Business pretty good
ut your placer" Second Clerk = 20,
yes! 1t has been so rushing that they
have not had time to pay the hands
for three weeks"
Prof. Donder, OF Utrecht, has dis
covered that 1t takes the brain .087 of a
second to elaborate single idea. But
then the average brain has long time
to rest afterward. d.--Exchange.
Proud Mother-"At last, my dear,
your education is finished, and you have
diplomas from the highest seat OF learn
ing in the world" Cultured Daughter
(wearily)-"Yes, and now I'm too old
to marry. IN. Y. Weekly.
1t is customary in Russia for trav-
elers to carry their own bed-linen, pill
lows, towels, etc. That is better than
carrying off the towels, etc, belonging
to the hotel, as is frequently done in
this countrv.-Texas Siftings.
"A negro draYman while driving
dray heavily loaded with merchandise
at Macon, lost his balance and fell OFF,
and the dray passed directly over his
neck. Strange to say, 1t was not broken,
but the negro's injuries were serious.
THAT new girl of yours is rather a
shrinking, modest creature, Scadley,
isn't sheP" ''Well, should say she
was. l didn't visit her more'n week
before she suggested that turn down
the light in order that she might hide
her bushes. Philadelphia Times.
-Larkins--Divorces are not numerous
in Japan, 1 believe" Bunting-"I
don't know; but how did you form that
opinion? Larkins-"From the fact
that women are not permitted TO appear
on the stage in that country. IN. Y.
World.
-Mamma-"Um-ah dear. This
young man who is calling on you so con-
stantly-do you think he has any inten-
tions?" Laura-"He doesn't know
whether he has or not I am the only one
whose intentions are going to cut any
figure in this deal. ."-Terre Haute Ex-
press.
--Pat--"This is a great scheme" !"
Bridget-''Phwat is?" Patti see that
man can get post-ofIice money order
for $100 for 45 cents. / have dollar
left and I'll git some av thin ordhers
this very day and sthart in business
again. This is great country. New
Hampshire Republican.
-Bib,iomaniac-"W want now is
suitable motto-please don't touch
that book; paid forty dollars for the
binding alone-a suitable motto for this
room. What would you suggest?"
Cynicus-"Why not adapt Coleridge-
Books, books everywhere, but not a
thing to read? "--Harper's Bazar.
-Villager-"Ah! Congressman Blank,
very glad 1 met you. / want you to in
troduce a bill compelling all brass
bands to join the militia, and in case of
war march to the front. Congressman
"Um! Suppose such bill should be-
come lawl then what?" Villager-
"Then what? Why, we'd get up war"
Good News.
"A Clue.-
Within hammock snug they sat
But how the two behaved,
One could not tell, it was so dark,
Had 1t not been for the remark
20, George, you must get shavedl"
Philadelphia Press.
"A woman may fret and chafe be-
cause the pudding is overdone, or get
her nerves all into snarl if her hus-
band happens to bring home company to
dinner unexpectedly, but when it comes
to wrapping up sore finger she stands
at the top of the heap, with mien free
of vinegar and touch lighter than day.
RAMS Horn.
-Susie-"Going TO the country this
summer, Bessie?" Bessie-"Yes; but
we hardly know whore to CO." Susie-
"Why don't you go whore you went last
year?" Bessie-"To Farmer Haycut's?
That's where we were intending to go,
only we heard that Farmer Haycut
made so much money out of keeping
summer boarders that he came to the
c;t +n 1.-Two ~, VanIaa Plodo