Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1890-05-25


"Mrs. Patterson used to come into my
house and some way even the servants
treated her with more reverence than they
did my other guests. 1 used to watch the
effect that her presence had on different
people, and even those who seemed most tc
lack delicate intuition would appreciate her
rare charm. I once took lady to call upou
her whom thought had every good quality
but one, that OF delicacy of feeling. When
we came out she said: WAS there ever SC
perfect woman. She is like a bit of most
fragile china But Mrs. Patterson had
generations of good breeding back OF her,
though 1 think woman can be perfect
lady without that. Indeed I have noticed
members of her own family who did moi
have touch Of her peculiar graclousness.
Instead of thinking kind things she always
did them, and do not know whether that
is not the quality that most of all makes
the woman we recognize as the perfect
lady
SOUTHERN WOMEN ARE HELPLESS.
SIT is true that Southern women, as a rule,
| are held up as examples of perfect womanli-
ness, and take it it is not because they are one
whit more kindly of heart, but because they
study the art OF pleasing more, and won
| der, too, if their seeming helplessness does
not have much to do with their reputation.
1 have noticed that even if you do so slight
thing as to ask them to your dining
room to take cup of tea, they look at you
in such a helpless fashion that futter OF
pity fills your heart, and you involuntarily
take them out, all the time thinking
what a sweet woman"
After this little talk Mrs. Ingalls, wrote a
| note in which she SO we'll defined the quail
ties of the perfect lady" that give it. ga
woman may be cultivated, accomplished,
stylish and thoroughly au fait in all the
forms and customs OF polite society and still
be lacking in the essential qualities that
make lady. On the other hand true lady
may be neither stylish or accustomed to
society, but she will grace any occasion she
may honor by her presence. The true lady
possesses the refinement of the heart and
soul that reveals itself in every action. In
training daughter mother should en-
deavor to instill kindness of heart and
thOughtfulness of others and to be thor
oughly unselfsh."
Both Mrs. Miller. wife of the Attorney
General, and Mrs. Senator Hearst think
that simplicity is the chiefest charm of
young girl, and Mrs. Miller says above
everything else q young girl should act so
as to receive the praise of older people.
MRS. SENATOR FRYE's STORY.
According to Mrs. Senator Frye, OF Maine,
Mrs. Hamilton Fish was one of the most
perfect ladies ever in official life here. Her
eight years reign as the wife OF General
Grants Secretary OF State was certainly un-
matched in the annals of Washington
women, and her acts and decisions are still
quoted. The story is told of her when one
of the other Cabinet ladies at the close of
General Grants last term suggested that
they lay down some rule for the government
of future Cabinet ladies, saying with consid-
erable esprit, MADAM, we have done as we
chose. Let US permit our successors to fol-
low their own pleasure"
Mrs. Frye tells story of her that shows
her sweet thoughtfulness. Her little daugh-
ter was home from school and the mother
took her with her when she called upon
Mrs. Fish, introducing her by name, Alice,
and mentioning that she was home for a
short vacation. The next week the little
maiden was overjoyed to find by the side of
her father and mothers invitation to large
reception, card, bearing the words, For
Miss Alice" A few years later when that
little Alice died the heart-broken mother
met Mrs. Fish and there was no word spoken
but only a gentle touch of the hand that
made the tears come to the eyes of both.
That is sweetness and surely the perfect
lady must have this kindly thoughtiulness
of children. Mrs. Frye says that the thing
most to be criticised in Washington society
is something that people have complained
of ever since society originated-that Of an
invited guest taking the liberty to take one
or two or dozen friends with her to q re-
ception or entertainment.
MRS. CLEVELAND HER IDEAL.
Mrs. Grover Cleveland is the ideal, ac-
cording to Mrs. Senator Cockrell, the wife
of the Missouri Senator, and she gives the
best of reasons for her choice. "Mrs. Cleve-
lands simplicity of manner was what made
her The Perfect Lady," said she, "al-
though think even that would not have
made her so dearly loved if she had not had
with it gentle dignity which kept her
from being confused in the most trying stu
ations. A woman who is easily fustered,
no matter what her other charms, can
never appear the well-bred woman. I saw
Mrs. Cleveland in society, where she was
both guest and hostess, / saw her in the |
privacy of her lie at Oak View, and 1 |
think never, no matter how familiar l |
became with her qualities. missed express
ing to myself or whoever was with me my
admiration for her uniform affability and |
gentleness.
"People seeing her just once might have
thought it assumed for the time, but know
it was natural. Did you ever think that |
that woman in the whole time she was con-
stantly before the public never said one
word that Mr.. Cleveland's enemies could |
turn in the slightest degree to his i'll? That
is a marvel to anyone who has been in |
society for any length of time,
for know I have pitied in my heart men
whose wives had so little tact that they
would openly say things which would en-
danger their husbands prospects,"
'Tact is a great thing anyway and espe-
cially necessary in the vile public man.
There is one quality that think is incom-
patible with the idea of perfect lady, and
that is the saying of just what one thinks 1
have noticed that people who say what they
think usually think very unkind things.
Mrs. J. G. Burrows. of Michigan, thinks
that Mrs. Hayes was the most perfect type
Of American womanhood.
Miss GRUNDY, JR.