Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1890-09-22
SNAP SHOTS IN SEASON.
DID Mr.. Delamatsr kiss the Blarney Stone

as we're happy, old boyF' Perhaps
YOU have, perhaps you have not However
this may be, the fact remains that something
draws US over the beaten paths. Your doctor
says: seek new scenes: don't look at the same
faces, the same buildings or tramp the same
streets day in and day out; change Is what you
want, and you must have it." That's all very
well, Doctor. but unless we seek new field we
almost always stick to the well-known Streets
meet the familiar faces, gaze upon the same
rows of houses and business blocks. It's queer,
isn't itf What draws our feet over the worn
toepaths week in and week out is a mystery
which, possibly, few have tried or cared to
probe. Is this the Sixth Sense referred to by
Mind-reader Observation-Disclosures? Per-,
haps it is. Who knows?
IF YOU want to see creased lightning watch
the fellow wh0 swabs of the trolley wire on
sleety day.
THE SUN put on an overcoat Saturday. So
did the folk who keep such articles in stock.
A MARYLAND woman has a goose which was
given her when she married 81 years ago Lots
of women still have the goose they got on their
wedding day.
PAsTEUR is treating woman for cat bite.
Catnip tea will not be prescribed.
THE Conger lard bill slipped through as
easily as conger eel.
UNDREssED kid is not as popular on the
street as in the nursery.
THE college boys are talking more about
football than the course of studies If they ex-
pect to follow craftsmanship this is probably
the best course TO study. The coming Congress
man must be well up in rough-and-tumble
tactics.
WANTED-A quorum. Apply to Thomas
Brackett Reed. House end of Capitol, WASH
ington. ID. c. No kickers need apply.
THE fellow haunted by a smils may have
ghost of chance after ALL
IT'S not the cigarette. but the thing at the
end of it that causes the anxiety.
THE chief product of Mary Anderson's
rancho now is coyotes and jack rabbits. Our
Mary can handle a stock company more sue
cessfully than a stock farm.
THE Gear must be preparing for big hunt
ing expedition He has placed order for
100000 guns in France. Perhaps the beautiful
blue Danube will be Redeemed after all.
IT costs less to buy a title of nobility in
Europe than to buy title to real estate in
Pitrsburg.
THE hair and whisker crops are the only
ones up to the average this year.
THE ballot is the lottery ticket of the poll
tician-
The model housewife does not need to count
her fruit jars and calculate how much jam she
will put up this winter. She can take a rest
and feed the visitors on gelatine and cake.
JOHNNY seems to be getting his gun all over
the land.
THE New York Herald illustrated rain
storm the other day. This is carrying the thing
too far. How do they expect to get good re-
suits from dry plate on a wet day, anyhow?
JAY GOULD says the country is all right. In
other words, it's not jay.
AN actress in one of New York's society
theaters shocked the audience the other night
in a studio scene. She appeared in pink flesh
ings. stripped of all superfuities. Even the
actors were staggered at the life-like model
will doubtless draw the drapery around this
pink of perfection and lower the box office re-
ceipts.
THERE be scruples in drachms, but many a
man takes his dram without any scruples.
In this age OF misplaced switches loose rail-
way ties, Flobert rifles, canned fruit, unloaded
guns misft prescriptions, cyclones, dynamite
INln arI
wires, it behooves every man. woman and child
to have names ana addresses tattooed on their
bodies and stitched into their clothing, so as
their friends can be notified and decent burial
assured.
ADAMN will not stop the current of events
PERHAPS Mind Reader Johnstone can tell
an anxious world who struck Billy Patterson.
THE elephant has roaming nose.
BROTHER SHEPARD, of the Mail and En-
press. is advertising an article in Gay Paris"
by Rev. Dr. John Hall. What Brother John
does not know about the high jinks of the gay
city would fill book. Or has he been
Summing?
JUDGING from the vote cast Friday at DIS
PATCH Exposition headquarters on the ques-
tion whether funerals should have right of
way over street cars. good many people think
the hearse should be turned into hurry-up
wagon.
TALK is cheap, Tut it takes money to build
pipe line Collect the cash, Messrs. Pro-
ducers Pittsburg will furnish the pipe If you
pay the pipers
RECIPROCITY in the voting line seems to be
quite popular in Pennsylvania this year.
as Sarah Bernhardt she could have handled
a snake with impunity, too.
If the tariff bill could be so fixed as to keep
the sand out of the sugar the consumer might |
stand tax without grumbling.
ing, TAT the request of Democrats" the eulogy |
lamented Samuel J. Randall OF course, the |
orders to print came from headquarters.
Don't drag dead men or dead issues into it,
managers. The people are wide awake this |
time and they want live questions to digest.
THE widow who enters a cemetery after |
dark and places a wreath on the grass growing |
over the remains of another person instead of |
her husbands, makes grave mistake.
WHEN the treasury Is full money cannot |
help being tight.
WRONGS can be buried in the heart and car. |
ried to the grave.