davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
\ sub.idv to Mnl-Owners.


The protected mill.Owners Of this country
are not IN favor OF extending the farmers
foreign market. for the simple reason that
the American farmers are the only competi-
tors that the mill-Owners have. When our
foreign trade is analysed it Will be found
that the American mill-Owncr does not have
any foreign competition. Every foreign
mill product that comes over our tarlil wall
comes in change for the agricultural pro-
ducts that 90 out. The American mill
owner does not, therefore. compete with
the product of foreign labor, but with the
product Of American farm labor, for the
goods received by the farmer in exchange
Tor the products OF his farm are as
much the creation of his own
labor as though they had been produced on
his own land. The mill-OWncr would nave
absolutely no competition whatever If none
OF our farm products were exported, iOl
nothing would be sent here IN exchange Tor
them. That is why men like BrOsius try TO
convince the farmers that they should raise
no products for export, but should limit
their crops TO the demands OF the nome
market IL would be a nice thing for the
mill OWnerif the farmers could be per-
suaded TO adopt the advice which Br0sius
gives them. Tariff or no tarlll, nothing VIII
come into the country when nothing goes
out. The protected mill men, now that they
have learned how 10 combine, can charge
whatever they please; and they can get
their labor as cheap as they want III, 100
for about One-quarter OF the farm labor
would be forced TO leave the farm and seek
emplOyment in the factories. 1t Is very
shrewd scheme, but no intelligent farmer
or city workman will take any stock IN H.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
Playing Grip" in the Catskiils.

There is in the village Of Catskill Rip
Van Wrinkle Club. This society did me the
honor to invite me to act the character in
their town. | accepted, and when | ar
rived was met by the worthy president and
other members of the club, among whom
was Young Nicholas Nedder, who claimed
10 be "A inea descendant Of the original
"Old Nick" Emulating the spirit of evo-
luton, the citizens had turned the skating
rink into theatre and a very respectable
looking establishment it made, though IN
its transition state the marks OF rollers dld
ceiling 20 it still" | was taking cup of
tea at the table in the hotel, when l was
attracted 10 the colored waiter. who was
giving a graphic and detailed account OF
this legend of the Catskill Mountains TO
one Of the boarders who sat nearly opposite
20 me.
ayes, sab" he continued; rip went up
into d. mountains, slep' for twenty years,
and when he come back hyar to dis berry
town his own folks didn't know him."
"Wby," said the listener, YOU don't be-
lieye the story is true'
"Truey' Oh course IL is. Why point
ing AT me. ''dats de man"
The town was blled with farmers and
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
A Monkey with some sense.

The following anecdote proves conclu-
siyelv that animals do reason: A friend Of
the writer owns a monkey, who answers +
the name Of ,Iocko. The children OF thu
house and Jocko are boon companions, and
Of a summer afternoon enjoy fr0lic to-
gether upon the lawn. One day some one
threw match down and the grass ignited.
making little blaze. Jocko saw 1t, stopped
and looked, then glanced all around. and.
seeing "A piece Of plank not far of, ran for 1t,
crept cautiously 10 the fire. all the tint
holding the plank as a shield between him
self and the flame, then threw the plank on
the fire and pressed it down and eXtin-
guished il. What child could have reasoHed
better and done morel Although, perhaps.
no danger could have come from the fire,
still, no one knew what the result might
have been. and the monkey evidently be.
leved that prudence is the better part OF
.yalor.--New Orleans Picayune.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
FLEETING FRIvOLITIES.
BITS OF FUN DRIFTING ABOUT IN
OUR EXCHANGES.
He Was Treated Kindly-Cleancd Up the
Onice-Fate of An Economical WIFE
How the Cook Dismissed the Mistress
short Selected Laushs.

He Was Treated Kindly-Cleaned Up the
Onlce-Fate OF An Economical wife
How the Cook Dismissed the Mistress
short Selected Lauahs.
A needy Frenchman once heard that a
marriage was on the taps between the
daughter OF a certain wealthy merchant and
the son Of rich banker. The dowery that
was to be given with the bride was five
hundred thousand franc. The merchant
was well known TO be on the lookout for
good bargain or to save a dollar, so on this
the Partisan founded his hopes of good
dinner at least.
He accordingly called at the merchants
residence and asked the privilege OF see
ing him on very important business. Ar
ter little while he was admitted to his
presence.
.The matter, sir, on which | called" he
began. "inv0lyes for you the practical saw
ing of two hundred and fifty thousand
francs. I
"Oh, my dear sir" interrupted the mer,,
chant. s.tbis is too serious to be discussed
before dinner. and as it is now my hour for
dining. pray take dinner with me, and we
will afterwards consider your proposition
at our leisure
Having partaken Of meal that left
pleasant flavor in the unfortunate's memory
the rest Of his life, they returned TO the
merchants study.
And now am ready TO hear your pro-
pOsal," he remarked.
The Partisan, after moments thought,
began:
II understand. sir, your daughter is to be
shortly married to the son OF the banker,
D'Argent p
Yes, that is true"
"And that her dowry is half a million 2
This was also assented to.
"Well, then, here is my idea: l am
ready 10 take her with half that sum and
thus you will save or gain exactly 2oO,OOO
francs"
The merchant could not but smile at the
proffer. though he did not profit by it.
"Well. how did he treat you DID he pay
the bill p
mo, he didn't pay the bill, but he treated
me very nicely indeed. lie sent servant
with me TO show me the door"
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19

A Detroiter who was in collision on the
Baltimore and Ohio road two or three weeks
lgo SAYS he was sitting just back OF a
farmer and his wife. The train was run
ming so fast that the couple were nervous,
and by and by the woman turned about and
inquired:
"Mister, do you think there is any dan
gerg"
"No. ma'am, not in the least" he replied.
Five minutes later, the speed having per-
haps increased little, the woman again
turned with:
mister, where are you from!'
detroit, ma'am."
"And there's no dangerW
"NOne whatever"
Ten seconds later came a grand crash.
aud the coach reared up and fell over. As
it went, with everybody shouting and
screaming, the voice Of the woman was
heard above everything, crying:
"Oh, William, what liar that man from
Detroit has turned out to be-"
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19

The name OF Lord EllenD0rOugh, whose
death is announced, was in his youth asso-
ciated with that Of Queen, then Princess,
Victoria. 1t was matter OF common rll-
NOR that the TWO young people were de-
voted 10 each other, and that the youthful
Queen insisted that she should choose him
as her c0nsort. But reasons of state pre-
vailed over love and young Peterborough
was given a commission in the army and
went 10 India. where he distinguished him.
self His romantic love affair led to the
writing of "A ballad which used 10 be sung
i'm the drawing-rOOms Of Great Britain, the
first verse OF which was as follows:
III hang my harp on willow tree,
I'll on TO the wars again;
4 peaceful home has no charms for me,
The battlefield no pain;
The lady love Will soon be a bride,
With a diadem on her brow.
Oh. why did she latter my boyish pride?
she's going 10 leave me now
Philadelphia Record
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
A Wonderful Memory.

~ want something" said farmer as he
other day.
"Well, what Is it:'
IL didn't tie string around my finger,
but | guess | can get aroued 10 il all the
same. What's the name of the lake below
us~
Lake Erie"
Exactly. What's the name Of the bay
which the boats run to-?
'Put-in-Bay."
Correct. Now, then, who put in there"
Perry"
straight as a string. want ten cents
worth of parygoric. My old woman said I'd
be sure TO forget IL. but here's the proof
that didn't."-Milwaukee Journal.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
Party and Its lmpersonation.


Everyone knows that corporation mas
neither "a soul 70 be damned nora body to be
kicke and much me same tn,ns may ,,t Ie
the Republican party. Where large num-
her of men is concerned il is hard TO iiN
the responsibility for wrong-doing on any
one man or on any one set Of men; and
people in general are inclined to treat
win serious consideration the judgment
Of many minds. Thus it comes that
party may go much further in folly aud
wroilg-doins than an individual might dare
10 And thus il comes that the Republican
marty, which has been playing the Matt
QUAY for years, finds itself in an uncom-
Portable position when 1t has to support me
very man who has best learned its teach
ings, and who most closely follows lis eN-
annie. What Inc has done would have been
all right, according TO the Republican stan.
dards, had The party done IL. but u 10 no'
quite the same thing when mana con-
crete, plain, undcniable, gei-at-able man.
Is concerned.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
Our Office Boy.

We see him In the cashiers vest
with faded satin lined.
And on his head the battered hat
some drummer left behind.
We see him Mondays I'm our frOch
And Tuesdays In our sack,
We see our Old suspenfers on
His sturdy little back.
We see him smoking cigarettes,
Anon we hear him swear;
We catch him reading "Doadeye Dick"
Upon the Office stair.
We see him every saturday,
He hangs around 10 dlaw
The "three cold bones" he talks about,
And carries nome tO"maw.'
We see him grave and see him gay,
In sunshine and In rain.
But when we want our Office boy,
We look for him IN vain.
lClOthier Furnishcr.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
A Kind Living Angel.

Interesting extracts from little Maine
girls letters from Ober-hmmergau, the
celebrated home of the Passion Play, writ
ten 10 her aunt in Hancock county, are
published by the Ellsworth American. The
place was so crowded that she and her
companion had to sleep on lounge, while
many were without shelter for the night.
"One of the angels brought us here to-day.
and he was kind enough to lie about it and
tell me | spoke beautiful German" she
quantity writes. What a volume of ethics
there is in this story OF the Kind and lying
ANGEL -LewistOn Journal.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
The Presiden'- opportunity.
Philadelphia Times. J

President Harrison now has Il rare oppor-
tunity to elevate himself in the estimation OF
the entire country by the appointment Of
Judge Gresham to succeed the late Justice
Miller as Supreme Judge.
The President won't incline % do IL be-
cause Judge Gresham has been In some
measure his rival; but its only big men who
do big things, and il yould be the biggest
act of the Harrison administration to
make Gresham supreme Judge.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
NeyerDrank Rain water

In new country house - Bridget
Pbwat's the matther wild the wather, Mary ?
Mary-YOu mean the color?
Bridget do. It's stained, IL is
Mary-It's rain water.
Bridget-An' do they drink rain wather;
Mary-Certainly.
Bridget-Sure that's the furst | iger
heard of that. In the ouid country We
drink no rain wather. We may be poor,
hut. thank God, we're not ignorant
Puck.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
Fate of,be economical Wife.

A young husband, who knows his own
weakness for spending money, tells the fol-
lowing unkind story about his wife, who il
supposed 10 be. prudent. Mrs. Jones was
always on the alert to save the pennies
which she said that her husband would
squander in cigars and newspapers. Her
economy was not only y virtue that she
made OF necessity, but pet and mestipa
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19

ALEXANDER w HARRIS, promi-
nent LAWYER at No. 11O5 G street \. W.
Washington. d. c, under dat 81 lanuary
Co, Richmond. Va, giving the history OF
a case of skin eruption OF twenty years,
standing, the result Of malignant biood
disease. (At this time Mr.. Harms had
been unable 10 walk for six months In
replyhe was directed TO use A. b. {. Altera-
cured : March 1, 1890, Mr.. Harris again
wrote A. B. c. Chemical 60. IN the follow
ing words: 1.-THE improvement in my case
so far is almost miraculous. am really
yettino we'll. ard can walk as well as
ever could. and my general health was
never better. shall write you from time ne
TO time. Meantime you can refer any one on,
to me YOU desire. and shall certainly tell
them that the A. b. c. Alternative has done
me more good in two months than mas
twenty years experience with various emf
nent physicians and all other remedies
tried.J Under date Of April 9TH, 1890, MI
Harris wrote 81 am entirely well.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
FEMALE IRREGULARITIES.
No. 2O6 W. GRACE STRgEr, !
Septembcr 20, 1889.

A. -. c. CHEMICAL Co;
, IL gives me pleasure 10 recommend your
" A b. {. Tonic" | have observed It's
action very closely with a lady member OF
my family. Your Tonic was used for what
Is commonly known as change oflife The
patients condition was indeed critical.
very nervous, weak and emaciated, with
no appetite. She had the best medical
attention from the commencement, ana
had tried many recommended remedies,
disheartened and impressed with the be-
lief that no remedy would be Of benefit To
her that | found II quite difficult TO get
her 10 try your Tonic. Finally she did.
1t had n charming effect. A friend OF thi.
lady also tried IL with similar results, and
I heartily endorse IL as the greatest boon
ever offered 10 suffering women.
W. C. CLEMoNs.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
Durrmc ninO chiquitO
Que Viene 81 COCO
\ Sc ilcVa a los nlnOs
nn4 In4rmpn pOgJ

Thus the King of Spain falls into slumber'
and as his sleep-song ceases. His Majesty
senunels pace with heavy steps outside the
walls of the palace, and during the long
watches OF the night repeat the hours with
"A deep-toned "Alerta'' guards, be care
mrr-as they meet each other IN their
rounds From Paris Figaro.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
iforfity Yourself

Against malaIial diseases that are 80 pre-
yalent at this season by thoroughly cleans
ing The bowels and accusing the liNef 10 us
norm Al action. Take DIR. DtYids Nesempie
Liver Pills.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
WASHINGTON. d. c..

WARRINGTON, ID. ~ I
D2o Ninth ST., n. w, April 4, 1901
A. Il. c. CHEMICAL Co.;
Gentlemen,-I have been using your a.
II. {. Tonic and A. Is. G. Expeetorant tor
chronic Bronchitis and cough for two.
months. II is the only thing havsfound
10 give me REAL RELIEF. really believe
/ am now cured, bat will yet continue ~
for some time. I would urgently advise
any one TO take il for similar troubles.
Respectfuliy yours, A. o'BRIEN.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
cLyxpox. MD. April II. 1890.

A. u. c. CHEMICAL Co.:
csntlemen.--I have used your A. u. {.
Tonic Tor Dyspepsia. catarrh, and general
debility, and hnd IL very superior RIM
edy. have suffered with this trouble Tor
thirty years. but have good reason 10
believe your Tonic Will cure me.
w. T. uAUottEY.
npIcE ONE DOLLAR.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
RICHMOND. August 81. 1889.

To THE A. b. c. CHEMICAL Co.;
Gentlemen,-After n thorough test OF
YOUR "A. Is. &. Tonic" in my own house
hold, cheerfully state that believe " 70
he an absolute specific In cases TO which
ladies are subject at certain periods OF
life, and where an arrest Of depletion IN
physical strength Is sought.
las. ID. CRAIG.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19
FROM A wEiL.kNowN PHYSICALLY


Or. r. NJ. BAcBY. a weii-known physi-
clan of Louisa county, Va, Bumpass post
office, under date of Sd Feb'y, 1890, re-
norts two severe cases of scrofula.
First Case--A lady with hereditary scro-
fula, afflicted twenty years, discharging
purulent after during these twenty years
through three fistulous soresfron the hip
Joint until about six inches of the thigh
bone had been destroyed by liberation.
In Iune last she commenced the use OF A.
b. {. Alternative. Her health rapidly i'm
proved. One of the fistulous sores ceased
TO discharge matter and healed readily.
During the three onths following anot Their
sore ceased to discharge and healed as the
first one. The last one has abated hall
its former discharge, DIR. Bagby says he
has good ground to hope for her perfect
recovery by persistent use of the remedy.
The limb was shortened about six inches
by destruction of bone before the remedy
was used.
second Case--A young lady of the same
family with hereditary scrofula ana ens
largement, with liberation OF parotid
glands, and many sores on various parts
OF the body, commenced using A. ID. {. Al
terative three mouths ago. All the sores
and engagements have disappeared, AMI
the doctor writes his opinion that her per
feet recovery is only a question OF time
and OF the continued use OF the remedy
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-10-19

Alter our enthusiastic visitor had made
ont his case with entire satisfaction 10 his
own mind the knowledge Of single fact
suddenly dissipated his views and brought
him 10 a serious and startling conclusion.
lie insisted that the country 50 inviting,
and by nature 20 beautiful 10 behold, was
not in truth al that very time inhabited by
civilized people. He had just been told that
the chief hudrance 20 the realization OF his
views on the sheep question was in The diff
Guilty. nay, imDOssibliiy. o: protecting the
animals from the fangs Of marauding dogs.
That, but for this great obstacle, Virginia
would long ago have recovered from her
financial troubles. aud her people
would have become prosperous. When
lac had listened 10 this he main
tanned still more strictly his unique propO-
sition. Asserting that until the public
mind was reused % a sense Of It's darkness
and Ignorance, tni had realized indiyidu-
ally and collectively ia what state OF de-
basement they lived, there could be no hope
for them. and that any community con
iinalng 10 submit 10 the government Of
dogs and their deputies did not deserve
any other than the fate they then suffered.
: lms thought the Engliehman's opinions
rather extreme. II not personal, and not "A
few began % vince Under his reflections.
On the whole could but endorse much that
he said Here is the Oldest state IN the
Union, settled nearly three hundred years
ago, and It's best interests, It's most valuable
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1890-08-31

One of the most transformations men Of
whom there il any record. written or un-
written. died lately lie was ON his
death bed surrounded by sOrrowing friends
and relatives. Ia q voice weakened by
disease. yet fraught with deep earnest
ness, lac said:
Il know you are all quite fond of me
aud sorry to see me 20. which Is very
satisfactory at this time. When | am
slowed away for good and all. you will
probably place a tombstone or monument
10 mark the spot where ! am buried.
Don't let il be- gaudy or expensive; just
something plain. Above all. don't allow
anything fulSomc chiscled on the stone
In short, let there be no Eighty literature
just put on il my name and the letters ;
\. L.. see YOU later
Having received satisfactory promises
that his wishes should be Obeyed to the
letter-even the three letters-this I'M
OstentatiOus man turned his face TO thu
wall and modestly died.-Will Nisscher II
Chicago Press Bureau.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1890-08-31
oRIswoLD's LECTURES

A. Miner Griswold. the famous Fat
one of the best humorous
|cmrers on the platform. and one of the
f,t fellows on earth, has been engaged
r q course of thirty lectures by the Stay
|n Lyccum Bureau. lie has a new
|Uure. which he claims Is even better
han his Tour Around the World, and
|iit Is the funniest lecture ever heard.
d-wod is unique among platform en-
|rtainers. lie takes the audience into
/. confidence. chats with them naturally
nd easily. and keeps them In roar OF
|agghter all the time-Allan FOrman. in
be- New York journal.
Mr.. Grlswold, managing editor of Texas
Strings, will visit Fairhaven the coming
Einter while on his Pacific coast tour, If
can be made for an engage
|nent with him. Some society in this city
would do well TO get him as he will prove
/ great drawing card, and the association
which secures him will do a good thing
|or its treasury. The Slavton Lyceum
Bureau, of New York, has charge of Mr.
|Gnswold's dates. and that Bureau should
| be communicated with ON the subject.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1890-08-31

holdings IN the village, he owned an eX-
cellcnt farm near by. and was president
of the village bank. OF course he was
violently opposed to Jims attention, to
his pretty daughter Sue. and the young
lady's old maid sisters and prim mamma
were in chronic state Of agitation,
Superinductd 10y the same cause. Jim
took Sue behind him on his saddle-horse
one evening and they rode away. I'M
known to all Others in the village, and
were married by a squire in neighboring
village, who had performed this excellent
Office for so many other fugitive couples
that his village had become famous in
lour adjoining states, as sort of Gretna
Green.
When Jim and Sue returned to their
home and Jim cOmplaceutly told what
| they had done, CONSERVATION prevailed.
extensively. in both families while out
siders chuckled and metaphorically
patted THE high contracting parties ON
the back sues father was irrecOnciahlc
| in the premises, and the polar GOODNESS
with which Sue was received by Jim's
/ people fortunately aroused Jim'S indigna-
] ton, lie decided to 90 west and do some
thing, if it was nothing more than to
grow up with the country. He negoti-
ated a small loan and Jim and Sue were
shortly in carbonate camp.
1t Is not necessary to this history to tell
how Jim quickly developed his ability TO
bore with big augur. Fortune favored
him in obtaining the opportunity and in
an incredibly snort space of time he was
an important factor in great silver min
ing syndicate. The news of his success
reached his native village. first as a
rumOr finally as Il settled fact. and pro-
pOrtionately as the information took
solid shape letters from the two families
which began to 90 to Jim and sue upon
the first information concerning his sue
cess. grew in warmth as the information
increased in reliability, The rich ol,
merchant banker farmer became eXccS
siycly aifectionate and yeamed for jim
and Sue to return and receive the bes
and freshest blessings in the home mar
kct. Jim was very busy but he too
time TO write a yerv expressive. thoug
brief and not altogether elegant letter
! II read:
p RESPECTED parents ON both side
: and all others whom 10 may concern.
g nave neither time nor inclination f.
epiStOlary elaboration. Got the earth j
/ a sling. ours. SHORTY.
Jim has not become a candidate f1
United States senator vet. but prOhabl
e will when he has more leisure
e WILL NI,SCIIEB.
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1890-08-31

The Roy RAY of late date says: I'VE
yesterday received an invitation to attend
the meeting Of the Washington Press
association. which is called to meet in
Fairhaven. Wash, on September 3, lsO.
The railroad and steamboat lines have
rendered free passage To all those VINO
NAV wish to attend. aud We should ike
very much to go, but when a fellow has
Ian the work to do, from washing the
roller. setting the type and collecting
what little news there is In such a paper.
ID, the Ray, he doesn't have much time 10
fobuob with millionaires, so We can't be
there. But we'll be with them In spirit,
Just the same, and wish those present "A
pleasant time.
The HERALD sympathiles with the Ray
on account of the good times that streak
Of light will miss. and while the Ray is al
home in fact and here in spirit the other
fellows will toast the absent ones, not In
spirit but in the mildcr vintage of cham
|tauup