The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1890-10-17
MISCELLANEOUS.

The faShlonable London woman
now dyes her hair mahogany color.
-Mulligan-"Take some of the medi
cine, Mary Ann. The doctor said il
would ayther kill or cure without fail
Mrs. Mulligan-'Arrah, but which will
it do first?'-America.
1t is said that thirty new one-dollai
bills weigh as much as a twenty-dollai
gold piece. Any one who can get hold
of $50 at one time can easily ascertain
the truth of the above statement.
old Lady-"Where is your husband,
Mrs. DeLong?" Mrs belong lie
couldn't come. He has the rheumatism
all over him." Goodness me! And he's
over six feet high. food News.
II trust" said the love-lorn young
man, that the poem l sent you touched
you, even if only very little" ut
did, it did," she murmured; Il made
curl papers with Washington Post.
"A farmer near Los Angeles has
forty-seven acres of corn and is willing
to wager that 10000 of the stalks are
twenty-five feet high, which is higher
than man on horseback can reach.
acre.
In June and July, when the seals
are congregated at the rookeries and
mother seal has given birth to her pup,
the animal must 60 fifty miles for her
food. The visit is to the fishing banks,
and the seal swims it in about an hour.
Benevolent but Near-sighted EN-
ployer-"Patrick, what's that under
your coat?" Pat (who is working the
growler)-"T'm sorry to say it is can,
sir" Employer-"Great heavens, Pat
rick! Stop work and go straight to the
hospitalH-Munscy's Weekly.
Nathaniel Bailey's English Die
tionary," published in 1921, contains
the word Observation-Disclosures the
definition being "honorableness. " That
knocks completely out that familiar
breath tester of the old-fashioned SPELL
ing schools-incomprehensibility."
Two boys while hunting recently in
Oiai Valley, Cal, were freed by big
bear, which kept them on their uncom-
Portable perch for eighteen hours, de-
vouring all their provisions in tho
meantime. An old hunter came along
and raised the siege with bullet.
Mrs. Livermore says that her hus.
band is Republican, while she is Pro
hibitionist; he is u protectionist, while
she is a free trader; he has pew in one
church and she in another: he has one
doctor, she another: and vet they are
happy and harmonious and never dream
OF quarreling.
1t is not generally known that q
single mouse turned loose in a grocery
window will catch more flies in single
evening than fly paper catches all day.
And, besides, he eats them and don't
leave them lying around loose Don't
grudge the mouse his little mischief; he
is good fly and roach exterminator.
The romance of diamond mining is
all gone. 1t is now matter of excavat-
ing vast beds of blue clay by machinery,
washing it and sitting out the diamonds,
which, after being roughly sorted for
size, are sold in bulk by weight. The
men who do the actual work are mere
laborers, and their pay is proportion
ately small. Post.
First Auditor-''Who is that man
sitting in the box over there?" Second
Auditor-"He is the author of this
comedy" First Auditor - "Nell. |
should think he would have better taste
than to laugh so uproariously." Second
Auditor-"O, it's all right. He is the
author of the play, but he never hoard
those jokes before. Those were put in
by the comedians"
The wholesale destruction of forests
in this country is attracting attention
in Germany, and it is predicted that we
Shall in a few years be impoverished in
tree property. A striking comparison
Is made of the two countries. While
the United States has but II por cent of
its area covered by forests, the Empire
of Germany has % per cent of its en-
tire area so covered.
First Criminal-"Hello. Jim: how
did You you get out of iail?" Second
Criminal-'I filed bar and let myself
out Of a window" First Criminal
"But how about your striped clothes?"
Second Criminal-"O, that was all right.
The Jail isn't far from bathing resort,
and as soon as got down to the beach
was all right. They took my convict
rig for a bathing suit. America
The fall of William Hanlon. the
acrobat, seems as nothing in comparison
with that of George Holloway, of New
Albany, Ind. He was sent to the top of
the large brick chimney, ninety-fve
feet high, at the glass works, to tear
down the structure. Hardly had he
reached the top when he Slipped and
fell into the stack, and ricochetting
from side to side struck the bottom
without scratch. lie was at work
again in an hour.
There is a young lady in a sani-
tarium at Clinton Springs, n. Y, who
has become such q slave to chocolate
candy that all the shopkeepers for miles
around have been notified not to sell
her any. She has eaten so much of it
that her skin has become the color of
chocolate. Recently by a piece of de-
ception, she was able to get two pounds
of the candy from confectioner's and
ate it all at one sitting. She was seri-
ously i'll for while, but is again ready
for more chocolate.
Hard days are coming for those who