The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1890-02-05
NUM0R OF THE DAY.

counting Ine Clergyman III, IL ilheS
three to make pair ir.-Puck.
The musical critic should necessarily
be man of good sound Judgment
Life.
Miss Adipose refers to her slim lover
as beau and narrow.-Bmghan,ton
Leader.
You never can tell the size of woman's
grief by the frequenc! OF her sighs.-
Boston Post.
No American consul was ever seasick
enough on his voyage to throw up his ap-
pointment.
Because boy is remarkable little
shaver is no sign that he will become IA
barber. Binghamton Republican.
The fact that the poor man wants to
own mule may be because the animal is
SO we'll heeled. Merchant I'rareJer.
~ called to see you just az a matter of
curiosity, said the dime museum man
ager to the armless phenomenon. .-Mer-
chant TraUeJer.
Money is not essential to happiness,
but there is an indefinite something about
a big bank account that at times is very
refreshing g.-Epoch.
Young Sprigg-''Mr Bidquick, am
worth $50, 900 and l love your daughter. y
Mr.. Bidquick Qetired auctioneer)-
"Sold. y Chicago Tribune.
Mrs. Littlun (as her husband enters)-
"Hushl Baby's asleepw Mr.. Littlun
-"But that's the only time l have a
chance to be heard. ."-PWeE.
Gabby-"How did you get that dread
full cold?" Snufilcton-"Id the datural
way, stoopid2 S'pose 1 advertised for
plads ad spedifgatiodsP P-SVtings.
"When Greek meets Greek
Then comes the tug of war;
When the Way Back Sewing Circle meets
Then comes the tug of jaw.
Mrs. Broadhurst-'You must stay over
for our ball on Thursday night" ca unit
assassinate me with your kindness. -
Judge.
Stranger Gn dime museum) )--"Say,
where's the walking match you adj
vertised9" Manager-"See the livin'
skeleton over therel" "E p" "Well,
that's him. Time.
Necessity is the mother of invention.
These patent self-applying buttons would
have never been invented if women had
remained content to stay at home and do
the sewing g.-Terre Hawte Express.
Brown-"You know I'm quite a near
neighbor of yours now, Mrs. Golightly.
I've just taken a little house on the
river" Mrs Golightly-"Oh! Well,
hope you'll drop in some day. Judy.
Alice (at two A. NJ. in the parlor)-
"oh, George, ] hear papa coming
Rum" George (smiling)-"He won't
come in here" ''How do you knowl"
II lent him $40 this morning. Lao
renee american.
Put your best foot forward has ever been
shown
To be for mankind conmendable plan.
But the mule with way that is solely his
Puts his best foot backward as hard as he
can.
--Chicago Herald. I
What happy world this would be if
it were not for the thought of the long
and expensive litigation that will take
place when our heirs try to burst our will
in order to get a chunk of our million
aire state.-DaHsUitio Breeze.
''Well, John, said gentlemen to his
servant, ~ must say that it doesn't take
me half the time to dress that it does
YOU" "No doubt, sir; no doubt; but
then, sir, we are not all alike, sir, for
I've no valet TO help me, sir. "--Judqe.
Belinda-"I see that Clara has taken
to sending liberal donations to the hospi.
tails and asylums." Annable-"Yes;
you see she has everything she could pos
sibly want, she has not a wish ungrati-
fed, so she is going in for self-denial and
giving to the poor. ."-Ameriea.
Miss Charity TO bcsgar woman)-
"There, my good woman, is an old dress
Of mine with only the front widths and a
part of the waist gone. Ifyou will get four
or five yards of brown cashmere TO com
bine with it, and some new Innings and
velvet for a collar and curfs and panel
at the side, it will make you quite a neat
and comfortable gown. That is all have
for you to-day. - Time