The Telegraph-courier. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1888-1946, 1890-09-04
FOLLY AS 1T FLIES.

FHE silver question-got change fol
q quarter?
SHRoUDs had no pockets and they
went out of style.
PREPARED meat manufacturers can
all they make and make all they can
DEss-I say, Ned, can vou mend a
racket? Ned-No, sis; but can make
one.
It HEAR that your picnic was a swell
affair" 1T was. We all got stung by
hornets"
The bridal trip often saddles the
groom with outlay enough to make him
little sulky.
A PROMINENT Burlington caterer has
4 rather SLOPPY name for young society
buds. He calls them chicken CO.
quettes."
"No: 1 CAN'T say that I want the
earth, unused the freight car tourist.
about three-quarters of it is water,
and that amt got no use for"
"HIs life has been q success, be-
lieve?" "Yes, indeed. He's been mar
ried four times had the measles early,
and never got left in horse trade"
VISITOR Ito prisoner)-What brought
you here? Prisoner Misplaced conf
dence. Visitor - How was that :?
Prisoner thought could run faster
than could.
The way of it: "How is she your sis
ter? By marriage?" "N-no" stam-
mered Chappie. "Quite the r-reverse,
you know. By-by re-refusal of m
m-marriage.
"YoU are not the young lady to whom
I give lessons" said the piano teacher.
"No. The young lady to whom you
give lessons is sick and she has sent me
to practice for her."
EDIToR-I notice that you never
write ANYTHING about men getting
drunk and having the tremens. Rumor-
ist-No, sir. Editor-Why not ? Humor-
ist-I have had them myself.
DID you thank Mrs Nabor when
she gave you piece of cake, Bessie 2"
"No, mamma; it was the last piece on
the plate, and I knew there was no
chance of getting any more. +"
SHE-Don't you think You had bet
ter have shine? Your shoes are very
dingy. He-Why, they don't need it
they are patent leather. She-The
patent must have expired; you had
better get it renewed.
"MR. JONES, your mother-in-law law"
"Oh, do not say that anything has hap
pened to her. F" Nothing has happened
to her. What makes you so anxious
about her safety" "Why. man, she
pays my rent every month"
MAMMA-My dear. what are you
doing? Little daughter = Making a
pen-wiper for my little sister. M
But you haven't any little sister.
L. d. No, not yet, but Sally Stuckup
has juut got one. and know we always
get everything the Stuckups do.
OvERwoRKED HOUSEWIFE wish to
get a servant. Employment agent
Well, madam, we have some elegant
ones who wish trip to Europe, some
less desirable who would summer at
Saratoga, and few cheap ones who do
not object to Long Branch. Which
do you prefer?
CHICAGO actress should like to
have O part in your revival of "Cinde-
rella" Theatrical manager-Do you
think you can play the part of Cinde-
rella? Chicago actress-N-o, but I'd
do beautifully as one of the sisters
whom Cinderella's shoes wouldn't fit.
HER MISHAP.
She kissed her little hand to me,
Then blushed and quickly fed;
A crimson rose-bush caught her foot
And roses were her bed
hastened after aid to give,
and soothe the pain she had;
kissed the wounds the thorns had made
Not on her hand-I add
She pouted some and looked quite mad,
Then rising from her bed
And shaking out her truant curls-
You think you're smartl" she said.