The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1890-04-29
THE mi MAN.
Unique Story About a Person Who Syn
Dictated Himself.

" OO Aux w liz SO4N 4LJOOIASO vi q y uCA
world. It is true he realized that he was
indolent by nature and ~extravagant by
habit, that he had neglected certain golden
opportunities aud had been careless where
he should have been attentive; but in his
present mood he did not dwell upon these
unpleasant facts, but shook his fist at the
throng of humanity beneath his window
and denounced society, civilization, law,
order and every thing which in the most
remote degree tends to reward effort and
punish laziness.
Then he lighted a cigar, sat down upon
the edge OF his bed and counted the change
which remained from his absolutely
farewell" dollar He figured thus:
Breakfast.
Two ......25
newspaper
II ought to have thirteen cents left,
and I find only three. O, yes I remem-
ber-I gave a begger ten cents. Cad,
that was foolish! He's now sever cents
richer than I am. But away with these
gloomy thoughts. I'll read my paper and
forget my cares"
He drew his only chair to the window
and gazed down upon the crowded street
for a moment. Then, with a calm in
difference to his wretched financial con-
dition, he began his perusal Of the days
news.
Rubber trust, he murmured, between
pufs. Corner in wheat" "Talk Of a
New Salt Syndicate, :" "Reported Consoli-
dation of Southwestern Roads
Throwing down the journal, he watched
the smoke from his cigar musingly.
monopoly" he s~oliloquized, "that is
the keynote to success. Control some
thing that everybody wants-put up the
price-and there you are. What can [
get hold of? l own nothing but myself
hardly in the list of available assets.
Nobody wants me. There is no demand
for me-. | can't sell myself to an English
syndicate.
81 can't even pawn myself. But hold |!
Don't these capitalists work in a narrow
groove? They monopolize only those
things for which there is a great demand.
Why would it not be practicable to cor
ner something that nobody wants? For
instance, the world has no use for me.
Why not make the world pay for my
absence? By Jove, I'll syndicate my
self! Talk about Napoleons of finance!
Ye gods, I'll be Alexander, Caesar and
Sergeant Gilhooly all combined! Whoop!
Where's mypen? Here's paper! Good!
Now for itr'
Thereupon he wrote the following:
We, the undersigned, knowing Richard
Frothington, pronounce him the meanest
man in New York City. He has taken
food from the hands of hungry babes,
ROBBED blind beggars and treated his
friends to domestic cigars. Even in as
large a place as the metropolis his presence
is considered a public calamity. Beware
Of him.
Carefully brushing his hat and over
coat, Selling his cane and casting an
amused glance at himself in a small mirror,
Frothington left his room, locked the
door after him, lodged his landlady in
the hall and was soon in the street. He
looked like a young man Of wealth and
leisure as he strolled along, a smile on his
well-cut face and an air Of self satisfaction
in his iaunty steps. He entered a famous
uptown bank, after a short stroll, whose
president he had known in happier days.
Will you kindly sign that, Mr..
c." asked Frothington, stepping
boldly into the presidents room and
thrusting his paper before the busy cap
italist. The president looked up, recog-
nized Frothington, glanced over the paper
without seeming to grasp its significance,
scrawled his name beneath the legend,
Beware of him." answered the young
mans " good morning" with a bow and
was at once hard at work again.
Frothington smiled more gayly than
before as he returned to the street. He
realized that a most important step had
cost him but little effort. Going at once
to the lobby Of the R-Hotel he sent
up his cards to a celebrated politician.
A few moments later his paper bore a
name Of National reputation. The poll
tician had not even looked at the Screed,
having read the name of the bank presi-
dent at the first glance.
F~rotbington's task was now an easy
one. Before business hours were over
his document bore twenty-Seven sigma
lures, each one Of them a name known
to all men from Maine to Texas. Nobody
had read his scroll in such a way as to
gather its full meaning. He had been
questioned now and then, but his smiling
~countenance had treasured all doubters,
and the first name on his paper was a
magnet Lot to be resisted.
And now a horrible thought entered his
mind as he turned homeward. Had he
enough stamps to complete his design?
For the first time since he set out the con-
fident smile left his face, and his features
grew set snd stern as he quickened his
pace. Rushing to his room he nervously
unlocked his door, threw open his desk
and found-O, oy!--ffty two-cent stamps
and a pile Of writing-paper and envelopes.
Seating himself as though for a long effort
he drafted the following letter:
Mr.. Mayor: Will you kindly inform
your advisers that I, Richard Frothington,
pronounced by Messers.-here he in
serted his list Of names)-to be the mean
est man in New York City, intend to
take up my abode in your town at once
unless l receive by the next mail the sum
of fifty dollars. I inclose the full text of