The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1890-01-24
TALK oFTHE DAH.


/ II riches have wings we wish they
would occasionally fly our way
Epoch.
The man who Is ''alone with his
| thoughts" often is surrounded by tho
deepest solitude.
''See what I got in my stocking"
said Chicago girl as she pulled out q
piano from her hung-up hose.
Two of the wealthiest men In tho
west are said to have been messenger
boys. 1t pays to go slow, after all.
Patti is grieved that Chicago did
not appreciate 'Romeo and Juliet. !"
But then Patti did not sing where
Did You Got That HAITI"
We have at last solved the mystery
why tailors put buttons on the cuffs Of
coat sleeves. It is to tear out overcoat
Innings and get themselves job.
Sympathetic How bruis-
ed and tattered and torn you are"
Bad bcy-'Yep; l went out looking
for something" ''What was itP" IA
fight"
A Pittsburg newspaper, in its an
swers to correspondents says: '-Anna
Dickinson was born in 1872" Then it
gallantly adds: I'VE do not know the
lady's age"
Little Mabel-"Mam-,
ma. may have something to eat?"
Mother Gmpatiently)- -" Yes; take this
piece Of cake, and don't open your
mouth again.
A countryman who has been wear
ing an electric belt for liver complaint
found that it also affected his lungs,
so that now he has an electric liver
and electric lights.
At the theater. Van Jones'
George, l think it is awful, your go,
ing out between acts" Mr.. Van Jones
Mot half so bad. dear, as coming in
between drinks. Time.
A candid girl-,Father-"What was
John saying to you last night, May,
that he stayed SO late?" Daughter
.'Nothing much; John isn't a great
talker. He's all business.
The foresighted maiden-Urgent
suitor-.'With any kind Of manage
ment we could certainly keep alive on
$500 year." She-''Yes, dear; but
I would sooner be comfortably dead"
The consistent minister will not
preach steadily for two hours upon,
the iniquity of lying, and then bland
ly ask one of the leading members of
the congregation how he liked the SER
mon.
Harry-''And, dearest, do you think
of me all the day long?" Dearest
Il did, Harry; but the days are getting
longer now, and, OF course-well. you
know that that must make some differ
ence.'
'.Patient-"That medicine you gave
me for my cold, doctor. cured me en-
tirely." Doctor lin surprise) -''Did
it? Well, blamed if l don't believe
I'll try it myself. I can't get rid of
| mine"
Four:hly always has his sermons type
written Mr.. Grump-"Out of pure
gratitude; you don't know how that in
| vention has doomed the matri monial
| market"
What he does-First boy-"So you
have got q situation?" Second boy
Eyes, an good one" First boy
what do you do most of the day?"
Second boy-"Keep out of tho way Of
the boss"
Nature Freaks.-Miss Clara Qook-
ing at MIR. Crowley OF Central Park
What very droll little creature, and
so ugly" Young Mr.. Sissy-Yes, Miss
Clara, we are fearfully and wonder
fully made"
A ripe production Coming from the
theater-Wife-(to husband)-.'I en-
joyed the play ever so much. 1t is an
excellent piece of dramatic work-a
ripe production, I think" Eyes, a.
mellow drama"
The established rule-First poet-"I
wrote Miss Starlight week ago and
sent her my love. 1 don't see why she
has not returned it." Second poet
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES you inclose
stamps for its return?"
Thought they were for him.-Bobby
saw his mother buy some whalebones
in the store. When he got out he
said: ''Say, MAJ "Well, Bobby,
what is lt!'' Il don't think them'll
hurt as much as your slippers"
Briggs-"Young Smithers is a
friend Of yours, is he not? Braggs-
"Oh, yes" Briggs-..Does he ever
recite any of his poetry to you?"
Braggs -sCertainly not Didn't I
just say he was friend of mlne?"
A Doctrinal Necessity-Jones (who,
with Robinson has just passed q
Quaker on the street, Robinson do
you believe in the doctrine of non-re-
sistance?" Robinson-''Yes, when the
other fellow Is bigger than 1 am"
AS She is Spoke. -He-"Now that
you have made me the happiest Of
mortals, can / kiss you?" She (Boston)
Never having had any personal
experience of your osculatory abilities,
Mr.. Gesner, do not know if you can,
but you may"
| Overheard in the Kitchen. -s'What
did you wear last n!ght?" asked celery.
"a lovely mayonnaise." replied the
lettuce. "And youp" Il never was