The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1890-12-04
$500 per Annun1.
PuNegNr PARAGRAPHS.

-Giles-"What does Brown do with
All the money he makes in that
scheme?" Merritt-'Loses it in an
other scheme. ."-Harper's Bazaar.
The Qualification First Tradesman
--''Is he gentleman" Second Trades
man-'Well, l suppose so. He doesn't
pay his debts until you make him do
so."-Munsey's Weekly.
Contributor - 81 have an article
here concerning the benefits of advertis-
ing, which Il" Editor eagerly
''Yes, sir, we'll examine it with pleas
ure Yankee Blade.
eve have decided that baby looks
like Uncle Joseph" said the happy
mamma. "Why, Joseph Harris is as
ugly as a mud fence" ''Yes, but he is
worth 50, O00, 900. IN. Y. Sun.
Particular Citizen-"These new red
stamps are not as adhesive as they
ought to be-" Postal Officia1-'I guess
you never tried carrying sheetof them
in your pocket on hot day."-N. Y.
Weekly.
he-"George, dear, what do you
think our happiness is chiefly depend
ent upon?" He las his arm steals about
her willowy waist)-"Upon our Sur-
roundinrs, sweet - Burlington Free
Press,
II suppose, Somberlin, that you
often entertain your friends by reading
your Jokes to them" Friends? Alas,
I have none They all left me when I
took to writing jokes. Yankee Blade.
Mrs. Larkin (reading) MFRS. Nc
Gill, of Salt Lake City, found SIS gold
piece in the crop of chicken she was
dressing for dinner Larkin-"Now
look out for an English syndicate to buy
up all the chickens in the country. -
N. Y. Sun.
We notice that the number OF
female cashiers in large establishments
is greatly on the increase. We suppose
the explanation of this is that they are
either more honest than men, or else
they can't run so fast.-Ram's Horn.
New Assistaht-''W fer We always
give that there woman full weight"
Iceman-" Cause she amt respectable. !"
Assistant -"Ehv Iceman-''She's one
O tn low down kind that 'ud grab up a
light weight lump an run right out
inter tn public street, an make us
weigh it over agin. Good News.
-Loiterer lat railway station) why
does that boy set up yell every time a
locomotive whistle blows?" Small Boy
Hes tryin' ter see if he's got voice
enough to drown tn noise Of tn en-
: CINE" Loiterer-''What forP'' Small
: Boy-''He wants ter find out if he's
: adapted fer selling papers. IN. X.
Weekly.
: -He-"How have you been enjoying
yourself, Miss Esmerelda?" She-"I
have never enjoyed myself SO much as at
this very moment. 1t is so delightful to
be alone, absolutely alone, in perfeci
: solitude by the seaside" N. B.-He
mentioned this little conversation to his
, friends, and now they call him Perfect
, Solitude. Texas Siftings.
| -"But, Tom, dear, where is the big
> trout you said you caught?" ooh! that
t one! Why-yes, of course we'll, took
3 that trout, and it looked so good
: cooked it and ate it on the spot. And
l speaking Of eating, Maude, wish you'd
hurry up that dinner. / haven't had 9
. mouthful all day." And then Maude fol
: the first time doubted her husbands
: veracity. -Harper's Bazaar.
n The following advertisement il
n taken from the Liverpool Daily Post:
t WILL THE LADY WEARING SPECTA
w Giles, who, on Thursday evening, the 7tl
. inst, drove a dark pony and four-wheele'
j phaeton with groom behind, along Halewoos
Road, and INJURED A VALUABLE SADDLE
HORSE by not taking her side of the road
J. kindly GET BETTER PAIR OF GLASSES
v and TAKE DRIVING LESSONS before sh
ventures out again.