The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1890-10-29
PlTH AND POINT.

doesn't talk about any thing but the
sea, and he uses so many sailor terms
that l can't understand half he says.
| Does he own ship?" Landsman-"No,
| but he has friend who owns cat.
boat Good News.
Wife during quarreD eff l was
man would blow the top of my head
off before l." Husband (interrupting)
II don't doubt it, my dear; especially
If you had to live with the same sort of
wife do" EPOCH.
Only Question of Time. TT he
Doctor-"If you will keep me in clothes,
| will treat you for nothing" The
Tailor-"But l am never sick" The
Doctor-"No, but you will be after we
have made the arrangement Racket
They talked that way of me; they
called me an ass and donkey" cried
the lawyer to his clerk. "Why didn't
you take it down in writing? I'd have
made them prove it. 30, 1 thought
their word Of mouth sufficient" -Phila-
delphia Times
-Parson Bluff Remember, you
must give an account of all your actions
and deeds when you go to the other
world" Jimmy Fastboy-''I'm glad
you mentioned it. am studying new
system of improved memory. guess
I'll drop it now."-Yankee Blade.
-Alonzo-"What has come over
Reginald? He used to be such shy,
bashful chap, especially with women.
Now he puts on more airs than he can
carry" Alphonse- "Why, don't you
know? He was the only man at Under
tow Beach during the whole month of
July. America
-Smiley-"The Improvements in
travelling accommodations are simply
marvellous Why, travelling has actual
ly become pleasure, the appointments
of trains are so perfect" Bibliomaniac
And yet they neglect one OF the
principal comforts of life. They have
no old books shops on the trains. -
| America.
| -Judge-"You are sentenced to one
weeks imprisonment. You shall have
the best of food and any literature you
may desire, and"-. Prisoner" Most
righteous judge" Judge" Little An.
ME Rooney shall be played under your
window four times day." Prisoner
calling on his knees) Mercy! Mercy!
Sentence me to be hanged, instead. -
Boston Herald.
-Lucy-"Im afraid you do not love
me as fervently as you did" Jack-'I
swear by yon star that love you more
fiercely than ever There is no sacri-
flee would not make to convince you
that l speak the truth" Lucy-"Well,
anyway, when you called tonight you
did not embrace me half so closely as
usual" Jack-'You sec had this five.
cent cigar in my vest pocket and was
afraid I'd crush it, Chicago Post.
Jones Ito gatherer of personal gos.
sip)-''What balderdash is this? You
say here | am stopping at Saratoga
was there only long enough to eat a
sandwich" Il did not say you were
staying there. All say is that you
stopped there. Isn't that true? There
is all the difference in the world be-
tween staying and stopping" $50? I
never thought of that But stay! You
may stop my paper" boston Tran
script.
"A magazine writer has been having
something to say about remarkable
cases of memory, but none of them are
SO difficult to account for as the fact
that man will sit for hours in crowd
around hot stove in a grocery, telling
about things he can remember ever
since early childhood, and then go
home without the hairpins and other
things his wife sent him AFTER taking
along several letters he went up town
to mail.-Ram's Horn.