The sun. [volume] (Morris, Stevens County, Minn.) 1882-1895, 1890-03-13
TALK OF rnE DAY.

| eggsP" Boarder- "Fresh."
The peal OF banana has falling
infection. -Yonkers Gazette.
The squirrel seeks warmer climb
by going TO the sunny side of tree
An engagement is delicate thing.
You can't drop one without breaking.
The man with strong mind who is
asked TO mind the baby generally
doesn't mind 1t.
The true humorist never smiles
that is, unless somebody else pays for
| it.
1t is not well for stranger to go
| alone to q bank when he wishes 10 get
| q loan.
The Washington Star thinks it Is
Glove and liquor that makes the world
go round"
After the proposal-And do you love
him, childp Love him, mamma? I've
seen his bank book.
While the true American does not
believe in king he will bet his last
cent on four of them.
The less pair of lovers have to
say, when sitting up o. nights, the
longer 1t takes them to say it.
| Two OF the wealthiest men in the
west are said to have been messenger
boys. 1t pays TO go slow, after all.
People who are perpetually preach
ing that honesty is the best policy do
not always keep their policies paid up.
THE plot thickens," as Fogg re-
marked when he sank ankle deep in
the mud on the site of his late kitchen
garden.
Teacher: James had sixteen APP
| pies and ate fifteen" Small boy in men,
tai arithmetic: 'How in thunder did
he do it?'
Dignity is a good thing; brt if
you're in the rear of a big crowd, and
wish to see the procession, don't stand
on it. Get on barrel. Puck.
An item ON etiquette says: "Do not
smack your lips at the dinner table.
1t might have added that it is not de
rlgueur to smack other peoples lips
there, either.
Little Miss Fanny: II say, Bob,
can you tell me what a widower is?"
Master Bob Jagged -: Don't know,
Fanny, unless its the husband of a
widow. Judge.
Minister (to choir leader)-"I see
you have dispensed with Mr.. Deep
tones services" Choir leader-"Yes,
sir; ] thought change of base desir-
able. "-Pittsburg Chronicle.
Dalkins-I hear you are going to
start "a paper devoted to women. Have
you decided on the policy of it? Ink
sum-Yes. 1t is going TO be altogeth-
er about men.-Town Topics.
The imperfect simile-'I am like a
tree" he observed, as the clock struck
II. II am rooted at your side"
Yes, but you never leave, do you?"
said the maiden, sweetly. And then
he put forth"
Brother do you not feel concerned
for your soui?" asked the deeply sin
cere revivalist. My sole's all rigt"
replied Farmer Fifewheat, ''ef the
gosh blame d uppers don't gin out on
me-"
Prisoner at the bur-" said a North
Dakota judge, your offense deserves
to be punished by the state with a
term of ten years in prison; but as the
state is very harG,up at present l will
girs you only five years.
, An American e3itor incautiously
signed his name to aStypewriter testl-
monial, in which he says: Your type
writer is splendid companion for a
busy editor" The decree for divorce
has not been granted, but it is pending.
, Boss-''This makes the third day
now that you haven't shined my
shoes" Cuffy-"par's no bacEzin' in
, de house, sah.'' why didn't you tell
me before?" "Bekase 1 was afreed
: you mout buy a box. Texas Siftings.
Mean business man-Seems to me
you take a good White for lunch.
You've been gone an hour and a half,
, and yet restaurants are as thick
as hops about here Poorl v-paid
} clerk-l was hunting for place
within my means. New York Weekly.
The peacemaker: Don't you know
r it is very wrong to fight, little boy?
r What does the good book say?" Tom
my (who has just polished off the class
, bully): dunno. I amt read it nc
: further than David an Gerlire. "
Puck.
Little sister: MA wants you, Sam
my. Where have you beenP'' Sammy:
;; "Fishin'." Little sister: '.Did you
: catch anything?'' Sammy (sadiy)
5 'Nothin't all. -" Little sister (reassur-
AHStYJ' oh' IAU SCu VAL "AOu yOu
get home"
Q Landlord - "Sir, to you come, no,
Q tice to give, that you have not me paid
: for six months a penny. Of that not
) a word will say, but you are to my
0 wife love-making, and that must i'm,
mediately to an end come next month";
: German Wit.
! One day Ernest had been seriously
lectured by his mother, and finally
. sent to the yard to find q switch with
o which he was to be punished. He re-
: tuned soon and said: Il couldn't fine
any switch, mamma; but here's stone
q you may throw at me-"
d Sunday school teacher-'.Now tel
j me what the Epistles arep" First
scholar-'I dunno" Second scholar
-"l does.'' Teacher-'Well, John,
}, ny, what are the Epistles?'' Second
r scholar The Epistles are the wiye:
of the Apostles. "-America
Anxious Wife-Doctor how is my
e husband? Doctor-He will come
10 around all right What he needs now
J, is quiet. have here couple Of OPT
u ates. when shall give them tc
|. him?' "Give them to himP They
b are for you. madame. Your husband
needs rest"
A man will trust his friend with his
family happiness, his honor, life ITSELF
but when he sits down to game o.
9 poker with the same friend he'll watch
n him-well, if you've ever played poker
9 you know all about it; If you haven't
! it isn't necessary that you should. -
: Philadelphia Inquirer