davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-04-25
BRIGHT BITS.

THERE are so many people who pray for a
change of heart who ought to pray for cha lse
of head.-Atchison Globe.
MANY a man who is inclined to reach tie top
Of the hill gives up whea he finds the hill is so
inclined.-EtnltrG Gazette.
THE ANcIENrs excelled us in many things.
Now, there was JOB. a boiler that never ex-
ploded.-SGn Francisco Alta.
AT HEIDELBERG VIII you kindly tell me the
way TO the university?
Certainly; see you are a student, as well as
myself. "-rlie0ende Bldtter.
SCIENTIST lin restaurant Bring me decoc-
tioa of bur0t peas, sweetened with glucose, and
hShtened with chalk aud water
Waiter (vocferously)-Cotfee for one-ChGt-
ter.
AT THE ExHIBTTios,-First Critic Magnificent
truth TO naturel Don't you think 50?
Second Ditto--A real triumph of naturalistic
art! Perfect! But what do you think it repre-
Sents?-F Iiegende Btdtter.
WIFE latter lively ''spat"J-The fools amt
Husband-They amt, eh?
Wife-No, or would have the amount of
your insurance policy before this Wall Street
Neios.
VIsIToR-I do.'t see anything remarkable
about this girl. She seems to me to b. lust an
ordinary, uneducated woman.
Manager-Yes, that's so; but she is the woman
VINO bosses the elght-foot giant 1erre Haute
Express.
RESIDENT lin surpriset-You back again:
Didn't you know this is the day predicted for
the destruction of the city:
Returned Chicsgoan-I did. / wanted to
go to heaven with the rest OF you.-Chicdgo
Tribune.
BRIGHrwrr's Boy Father, was there any ship
which carried more people than the City of
Paris?
Brightwit's Boys Father-Yes, my son, the
Mayiower. She carried all the ancestors of
American socety.-Etmird Gazette.
Poor WOMAN! Have you no husband to help
you earn living!"
Il have husband, so called, but he is deeply
engaged in something else"
of what nature!n
'Trusting in providence Chicago Times.
HosTETrER McGINNIs-Do YOU really think
that we are going to have real spring weather
now.
Gilhooly-Tve no doubt of it, | see the
shadow of the stra Nberry shortcake looms up
no bigger than mans hand-IerdS Siftinqs
FAIR ExTHusIAsT-What dear little picture
it's just too sweet for anything Can you make
out the name of the artist, Mr. CadmiumS 1t
looks like "Ochre."
Cadmium recosnizing picture by rivap-
Humph. Mediocre, guess.-AnlesicGn
Grocer.
HARRY-She has lifted me, and l know 1 shall
die. Tne disappointment viii kill me,
Aunt Hannah-I knew how disappontments
affect one. Harry. But you'll get over it
felt just as you DO now when | set that waller
hen on thirteen eggs and only got just one poor
cnick out of the lot.--Boston Transcript.
Mrs, GABB crushing inl--O, Mrs. Gadd why
did you leave Six & Co. 5 bargain store SO
early They've just opened beautiful bank
rupt stock Of ribbons. Come right, back, uuick
Mrs. Gadd with powerful effort at self-con-
TROLL cannot Indeed, cannot must help
my husband to get dinner.-Ae,o York Weekly
You love your wife,
Yes"
And she loves you?'
Yes"
Then where does the incompatibilty comes
Il can't live on her income, mueh less sup
port The Epoch
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-04-25
He Was Glad to Get Rack.

There is considerable trouble between the
north and the south relative to the treatment of
the negro down in Dixie said ex-Congressman
Tom Ochiltree to a New York Star writer, ''and
that reminds me OF one of our Texas darkeys
named Sam, whom used to have in my service.
Sam could read, and in the newspapers he had
seen so much of the love the people of the
north bear for the colored man that he con-
Guided the north was the. place for him. So to
Iowa he went, where be was pretty well treated.
The people there cal ed him Mr. and shook
hands with him aud talked politics with him
as II he were an equal, but NOBODY seemed anx-
lous to have Sam WORK for him.
After awhile all of his money was gone, and
he then concluded the best thing for him to do
was to go back to Texas; so he started on foot,
hoping TO pick up enough food on the way to
a farm house, where a man from New York
lived. The farmer was very polite, but when
food was mentioned, said times were hard and
he didn't believe he had anything to spare. He
trie1 several other farm houses, but always with
the same result Everybody was polite, bnt no.
days he didn't have anything to eat,
until finally he came to a place where
man was out in the front yard
moving grass. To him he told the old story of
leaving Texas of his bad luck in Iowa, and of
his desire to get back to Galveston. and of mis-
great hunger. Before he had concluded his
story, the farmer interrupted him: You black
IDIOT" he exclaimed, why didn't you have
sense enough to stay in Texas? Sans face
Frightened instantly. he almost fell on his
knees for JOY, and he cried out: Boss. you
dunno how glad is to see you. When did you
to git 'mong friends agin.' Go in the house
there. you black fool, an git some chuck. Per
hapS you will know enough another time to
stay where you belong"
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-04-25
a Drummer Cuts His Eye-teeth.

Gene Smith, travelling salesman for whole.
sale hat store. said to the Chicago Tribune: I
am older now than l was when | started out on
the road about five years ago. l arrived one
night, on my first trip. at a small town in Wis
consin. To be honest about it, was homesick
After had partaken CT measly supper at the
tavern / went across the street to one of the
stores. 1t was oimiy lighted with candles The
merchant was clever enough in his way, and
much to my surprise, gave me an order. Still
l was disguised with the town. 1t was in me 10
say something, and it had to come out AS
was about to leave him said:
How in the world do you manage to live in
such God-forsaken hole as this?''
He said he had managed to live there most of
his life. The subject dropped and went back
to the tavern. Please take notice that do not
use the word hotel. On the following morning
the merchant came over to the tavern and cali.
ing me to one side said, how in the world is il
that you can get your consent to ask anybody
in such God-forsaSen hole as this to buy your
goods l do not think. he continued, that it
would be treating you fairly TO take your goods
aud you will please cancel my ORDER
l went out of that town with something a
good deal bigger than flea in my ear, and ever
since that time have always Dragged on every
town went into.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-04-25
A Breach O. Faith.

It is now clear that the republicans of
New York do not want ballot reform They
have been pretending ever since the present
legislature Of that state convened that there
was nothing they wanted so much as ballot
reform. They even went so far as TO charge
that the democrats were opposed to the re-
form, and that Gov Hill would veto any
ballot reform measure the republican legis-
Iature might pass.
1t is true that Gov Hill did veto the
Saxton ballot reform bill, but be gave ex-
cellent reasons for doing so. He pointed
out that the bill was unconstitutional, and
be made other objections which genuine
ballot reformers ad nitted were strong ones.
The governor, however, said that if the
legislature would pass bill that did not
contain the provisions TO which he objected
he would gladly sign it.
Senator Saxton, acting on the governors
suggestion. framed another bill which, after
being approved by the leaders of both
parties, was submitted to the governor, who,
otter a careful study of it, announced his
willingness TO sign it. Senator Saxton was
satisfied that there would soon be ballot
reform law bearing his name. He wrote to
the NewYork Ballot Reform League as fol-
lows: THE bill embraces every principle
for which we have been so long contending.
| shall therefore make every honorable
effort to procure its enactment into a law"
On last Tuesday night the republican SEN
ators considered the bill in caucus, and, by
a vote of 0 to s, decided not to support it.
Enough republican votes could have been
secured to pass the bill, however, notwith-
standing the caucus decision against it, as
all the democrats would have supported it,
but Senator Saxton weakly yielded to the
cancus demand and withdrew it.
The bill was the result of a con ference
between the republican and democratic
leaders of the House and Senate, and the
caucus action of the republicans was a clear
breach Of faith. 1t is asserted that the re-
publican leader, Plat, gave orders to his
friends in the Senate to kill the bill, tnough
what his purpose in doing SO was is not evil
dent. The republicans are now estopped
from charging that the democrats are OPP
posed to ballot reform. Indeed they have
placed themselves in the position of oppos-
ing the reform. 1t is doubtful If there is
any other state in the union in which poll
tics is so corrupt as in New York.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-04-25
PERSONAL.


JUICE GREsHAx's HEALTH is failing 10 such
degree as 70 cause his friends much anxiety.
THE PRINCE OF WALES recently appeared in
public with a yellow waistcoat and green gloves
DR. McCosH. ex-pressdent of Princeton. is
looking wei aud seems totase pleasure in social
intercourse.
CLEMENTS WHITE, aged -. OF Smyrna, Del.
walked thirty-six miles to notify son of a death
in the family.
Mrs. BURNETT claims that the four-act play
The BURGLAR is a pratIcal extension Of her
sketch, "Eiitha's Burglar"
KING HUMBERT's DYSPEPSIA having been ad-
yertlsed. his mail brings him an average of
forty sure cures every week
JAMES Hicks, aged s.. who has spent forty
nve years ia prison, has Just been arrested for
larceny In Pre5is county, Indiana.
The ELDEST DAUGHTER of Count Ferdinand de
Lesseps is soon TO be married to Count Ferdin-
and de Gontaut Biron, godson OF her father.
WILLIAM H. ENeLIsH is selling all his Indian
apollS real estate Harrison's return to Indi-
ana in 1892 may have something to do with it.
ELIZABETH POTTER, negFess living near Cum
beriand, Tenn, is said to have $50 descendants.
She is 1856 years old, and a great-great-gra
mother.
CHIEF JUSTICE FULLER made his first public
speech at Pierce and King meeting in Au-
gusta, Ne, IN 1852. His mustache wasn't ia
nous In those days.
BUFFALO BILL receives about ten letters a
week from women who want to marry. Some
OF these epistles are from this country, though
most OF them are from Europeans.
Rev. CANON BRosNAN of County Kerry, Ire
land, is on his way to this country to raise funds
Tor the completion of thu great memorial
cnurch In that town to Daniel O'Connell.
SENATOR T. c. PowER of Montana is a little
man with sallow face and Insignificant fea-
lures His eyes are bright and piercing. He is
more OF ousiaess man than a politician, and is
apoor orator.
GEORGE W. CHILDs, the rich Philadelphia edi-
tor and philanthropist, began his business
career by sweeping out stores in Baltimore. He
went 70 Philadelphia unknown and penniless,
and finally worked his way into a bookstore.
TIE QUEEN REGENT of Spain rises early, takes
a cold bath every msrning, even 10 winter, and
performs her toilet with the help of one of her
waiting maids. She usually dresses plainly.
ana never wears jewelry except on ceremonial
occasions.
COUNT MUENsrER, the present German am
oassador at Paris, is the author of one of the
best cooS-books of the day. A sarcastic col
league once said of him: "He is the best cook
among the diplomatists, and the best dplo-
matlst among the cooks"
DAN LAMONT says of the persistent talk of the
denomination OF Cleveland: 1T is without his
sanction and beyond his ability to avoid. There
are good many excellent people who think
that the old man should go round with club
and kill off all the fools
IT WAS REGULARITY of the late Samuel ].
Randall that he left the handling of his own
financial matters to his wife. 1t was a common
occurrence for those who were frequently at
home 10 hear him call to his young son Sammy
to ask mother for so cents or 81 wherewith
to buy postage stamps,
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-04-25
Tired of the Ballot

There is mistaken impression in some
quarters that female suffrage is on big
boom in Kansas, but the fact is that it is
steadily on the decline At the first NUM-
cipal elections under the act establishing
female suffrage in that state about so. 900
women voted. That was in 1887. The
women were quite enthusiastic, and such
workers as Mrs. Julia Ward Howe, Lucy
Stone, Miss Willard, Helen B. Gouger and
the Rev. Annie Shaw went into the state
and made speeches. White and colored
women crowded each other at the polls.
and the result of the elections
the balance of power in good many of the
towns. The next year, however, the female
vote fell off nearly so per cent, and it has
been diminishing each year since. For a
year or two no woman availed herself of
the privilege of running for office, but
finally a few of them were elected members
of city councils, and in one or two towns
female mayors were chosen. At the recent
elections the female vote was quite small.
and the number Of female candidates was
not as large as it was the preceding year.
1t appears that the women have simply be-
come tired of the ballot, but whether they
became SO because the novelty of the thing
wore off, or because they were disguised
with going to the polls with colored women
whose votes were sold to the highest bidders,
is question which is left to conjecture. 1t
may be regarded as significant fact, how
ever, that the white female vote has fallen
off much more than the colored.
1t cannot be denied that some good was
accomplished by the female voters. Al
though the right OF suffrage was conferred
upon them by republicans. in order to more
firmly establish republican supremacy in
municipal affairs, they have not held to party
lines much, but have generally voted for
the best candidates. Most of them have
asked only three questions about candidates
first, are they in favor of prohibit iona
Second, are they moral in their private
livess Third. are they competentl
Unless something happens to again en-
thuse the women, it is thought that ia
year or two the female vote will not be
large enough to attract attention.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-04-25
Diamonds and Johnny Cakes.

A young fellow was inquiring of Officer
Button at the Third street depot, says the
Detroit Free Press, about the tram from the
north when the officer queried in return:
Didn't you come in this morning."
Yes"
with young woman?"
Yes
II thought Sc. 1 took you for a bridal
couple"
Yes so we were"
And you are going back alone:''
That's what's the matter. We were married
day before yesterday and came here on a tour
She was all right when we got here but in
about hour we mad fuss She wanted
diamond ring and l couldn't buy it, Diamonds
Just think of it, I've got S25 in cash and
twenty acres of land, and expect to have to
live on beans for the next six months to pull
through"
and where is she now"
Over at the hotel. | left her money to paw
her bill and get home and she can stay or
come. Better have this thing decided at the
start, you know. Some folks are built to wear
diamonds, and some to eat johnny cake. I'm
johnny cakist. Theirs my train. If she comes
in to take the next Just see her aboard, but
don't encourage her any. It's row to see who
shall boss, and the best man is going to win"
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-04-25
SPRING ADVICE.
ISeientffc Afaonzfne. ]

Be careful OF your diet You do Tot mead
heavy food such as you require during the
winter.
Spring may be beautiful. but it is treacher-
GUS Do no. let it deceive you into cold. a
fever, malaria or pneumonia
Do not throw of your winter fannels too
early. 1t is better to suffer little inconve-
nience than to take cold.
II you feel tired, feverish or oyer-heated, do
not rush on and take spring medicines" Cool
tenn and purify your blood.
IL you feel hot and thirsty, do not drink large
quantities Of water or other long" drinks It
water, which viii queleh the thirst, tone the
system, and fortify against disease
Remember that only pure whisky should
ever be taken into the system, and that the
leading chemists and scientists of the present
day unite in declaring that Duffys Pure Malt is
absolutely the purest and best.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-04-25

The month of May promises to be epoch
luaking In labor circles. Indications, the
vorld over, point to a concerted movement
ON the part of labor to secure better pay
and shorter hours. In number of places
in this country the movement has already
l>egun and the strike of the Chicago car
l,enters has eliminated in an assault on non
union workmen. There is nothing en-.
'couraging in such an outbreak as this.
Whatever basis of justice there may be in
fthe demands of the strikers they have
nothing to gain and everything to lose by
i'esorting to violence. This Chicago out
break has special significance in view of the
May movement to come. 1t shows how
aense are the relations between labor and
rrsoital
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-04-25
Is It a Hoax2

The news, having upon it apparently
the stamp of candor, has been handed
out that Leland Stanford, the mill
ionaire senator from California, de-
sires to be President Heretofore
there have been slight hints that his am
bition was in the direction of the white
house, but no one seriously gave the matter
any consideration. 1t is the senator's inten-
ton, it is said, to pose as the
champion of the Knights of
Labor and farmers alliance organizations.
The bills he introduced into the Senate some
time ago, asking that the cover nmeut ad-
vance money to the farmers on their lands
at per cent. will be the main plank in his
platform.
He is said to be ambitious, and besides he
has the mistaken idea that money cal do
anything. Already he has an army of
boomers around him, who are engaged in
sending copies of his famous bill over the
country. Several photographers, artists,
photographers and biographers are at work
preparing campaign literature for distrib1-
ton this summer. His biographical writers
have been informed as to the parentage,
pAi VI anu al SSuiuS VI Vills CIIluieSs
man of money, and no small space will be
occupied in explaining the fact
that his heart has always
been full of sympathy for the laboring
man. He is working earnestly, and will, it
is thought, attempt at thu proper time to
break all combinations aud states against
| him by those means which wealth can M
mand. His candidacy will be regarded by
the people probably as JOKE, but the sen-
ator is very much in earnest. He has his
workers in good shape. a i'd the tune of their
song has been pitched for them by the
biographer. They have learned their parts
well, AID Col Joseph K. Hickey, who is ia
charge of the campaign, is enthusiastic.
The little trouble between Huntington and
the senator has been settled, and Hunting
ton will now support the senator with all
his strength. 1t may be expected. therefore,
that the next campaign will present mix
ture of almost all kinds of political conbi-
nations, pools and reform movements.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-04-25
A Reminiscence.

When mem'ry strikes her tuneful harp,
Recalling scenes now faint and dim:
Mem'ries enshrined within the heart.
Like air OF half forgotten hymn
lis then the veil is lifted, and,
ses cottage on the strand,
see my mother in the door,
Gazing out on the pebbly shore.
And loudly calling, Tom come home.
Your fathers here, the COWS have come"
/ turn and listen to the bell,
That tinkled all the live long day,
Over the fallov, heath and dell,
listen, then leave my play.
/ turn my footsteps toward that home,
Fairer to me than palace dome.
That vine-clad cottage on the shore,
With roses blooming round its door.
No fairer place care l to see,
No dearer place Oh earth to me.
l help my father feed the stock,
feed the chicks for mother dear,
Which at my call around me flock,
They seem so glad to have me near.
And when our frugal meal is Ger,
Father closes the open door;
He takes the Bible from the stand
And places it in mothers hand.
She reads-the Bible truths we feel
AS around our Preside we kneel.
My father, mother, boyhood's home,
o, never shall see them more,
Ine'er shall hear her calling, come"
Meier see her standing in the door.
The grass is green Ger mothers grave.
My father sleeps beneath the wave;
I'm left lone and weary soul,
Seeking for that heavenly goal,
Hoping on the golden shore
To hear my mother call me Ger.
Mrs. w. G. PARKER.
BdrleH Ga.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-04-25

That Mckinley monstrosity pleases the
Republic an party, or at least portion of it,
TO better than it pleases democrats. That
ordinarily thick and thin republican paper.
the ST. Paul Pioneer Press, is almost
naenacing in its attitude toward the bill. 1t
says: Western republicans have waited
for tariff reform because they believed it
could come safely only through that party
by which the tariff system has been main
tained. But they will not stand by tamelv
and see the tariff increased when it should
be diminished. They will not give their
consent to the imposition of duties not now
in effect in order that some capitalists NAV
be able to make good thing of it. They
Will not exchange tariff reform for bill
that raises the average of duties and dis
tributes them SO as to benefit the consumer
least" And vet, by what right does the
Roneer-PreSs complaint Hasn't Mai. Nc
Kinley built the Chinese wall demanded by
the last national republican conventions
And didn't the Pioneer-Press assert that
the success of the democracy and the Mills
bill meant ruin to the country2
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-04-25

The MORNING News is on file at the following
places, where Advertising Rates and other in
formation regarding the paper can be obtained:
NEW YORK CITY
J. h BATES, 50 Park Row.
O. P. RowELL & Co., 10 Spruce street.
W. W. SHARP & Co., p Park Row
FRANK KIERNAS & Co., I52 Broadway.
DAUcEY & Co., q Park Place.
w THOMSON, 80 PARK Row.
AMERICAN NEWSPAPER PUBLISHERS ASSOCIATION,
Potter Building.
PHILADELPHIA
N. W. AVER g. Son, Times Building.
BOSTON
s. R NILES, 255 Washington street.
PErTESGILL & Co., 10 State street.
CHICAGO
LORD & THOMAS, Is Randolph street.
CINCINNATI
EDWIN ALDEN COMPANY, &C West Fourth street.
NEW HAVEN
TEE H. P. HUBBARD COMPANY. 25 Elm street.
ST LOUIS
NELSON CHEsMAN & Co.. 1877 Pine street.
ATLANTA
MORNING NEWS BUREAU, So whitehall street
MACON
DAILY TELEGRAPH OFFICE, cs7 Mulberry street.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-04-25

The McKinleyites are getting into deeper
water daily. Their hearts yearned for the
Ohio wool grower, and the tariff on wool
went soaring skyward That ought to have
been satisfactory to all the protectionists,
but it wasn't, as the following from Tiffin.
o.. shows: 1.-THE Tiffin wooden mills,
among the largest factories of the kind in
Northern Ohio, have closed down indefi-
mUely. In an interview Supt. Waugh
unhesitatlngly asserts that the sole
cause OF the suspension is the prevailing
tariff, under which manufacturers are
compelled to pay heavy duty upon class
oil foreign wool which is necessary ia the
manufacture of high-grade woolens and
which is not and cannot be produced in this
country. L have been a lifelong republi-
can, said Mr.. Waugh, but tell YOU thous-
ands Of wooden mill operatives in this conn.
try, myself among the number, are having
their eyes opened on this tariff Question
The McKinleyites will get free raw mater.
al drunined into their heads after a whila
bnt 1t viii be after they are drummed ant
IF power"
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-04-25
INDEX TO NEW ADVERTISEMENTS,

MEETINGs-Palestine Commandery No. z,
Knights Templar; solomon's Lodge No. /, F. &
A. NJ.
SPECIAL NoTIcEs-Card Of Thanks, st. Johns
RectOry Society; Saturdays Special Prices at
Heidt's; Notice to the Public About Military
Parade; Savannah Volunteer Guards; The An
nual Examination at Female Orphan Asylum.
AMUsEMENTs- Complimentary Benefit for st.
Johns Rectory Fund at Yonge's Hall.
SPEcIALsAt Norton & Hanley's.
CHEAP COLUMN ADVERTISEMENTS Help
Wanted; Employment Wanted; For Rent; For
Sale; Lost; Personal: Miscellaneous.