Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1890-09-11
WOODBURY., n. J, THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER H. 1890

reckon we better go to bed, so as to be
in trim for the work tomorrow.
II will show you the room. the old
man remarked, arising
The politicians were shown into an
upper room, and the old man, placing Il
candle on the mantelpiece. bade them
good night and went down stairs
"What noise was that the major
asked when the old man had quilted the
room.
81 didn't hear any noise. the colonel
answered.
81 did; it sounded like some one gasp
ing for breath.
He might have heard noise-might
have heard old John struggling to sup
press his laughter.
Suppose we 60 to bed said the
major.
"All right You go ahead and viii
blow out the candle.
I They talked for some time before lying
down; then, after long silence, the col
onel uttered deep growl The major
reached over and gave him a rake with
the comb.
"What the deuce are you doing?' ex-
claimed the colonel, springing up in bed
"What do you mean?" And in his rage
he began to CRATE his teeth
The major, supposing that he was get
ting ready to begin biting, reached over
and gave him another rake.
"You Internal idiotr' yelled the colo
mel, feeling for the majors hair. "if
DOM xrrco1 x-o,, T,,, a eli
"What are you doing?" howled the
major. Let go, or I'll hurt you Quit,
tell you'll Haven't you got any sense?"
The major had found his hair
''Fll let you know what it is to rake
the life ont Of me with crosscut saw.
81 was doing it to oblige you, you
confounded wolf! Let go my hair!"
"Oblige me! Do you take me for
saw log? Look ont! If you hit me
again I'll pull every hair ont of your
head!'
They tumbled out on the floor, rolled
over and over. and then overturned a
tottering old wardrobe that came down
upon them with Il crash The major
swore that he was dead. and the colonel
yelled for light, but no light came
Had they listened they might have heard
another noise that sounded as if some
one were breathing hard The old man
was in the hall shaking the railing of
the stairway. The major was the first
to scramble to his feet.
81 will throw You ont Of this window"
he exclaimed.
"And if can find my pistol I'll shoot
the top Of your head off, howled the
colonel
This threat SO frightened the major
that he gathered up his clothes as best
he could and rushed from the room
"Why, what's the matter?" the old
man asked when the major came down
Nothing, only am going away to
get cannon and then come back and
blow that fool into eternity
''Did he try to bite you?"
He tried to kill me. that's what he
tried to do"
"Why didn't you rake hilny"
Il did rake him."
"HumphI" grunted the old man; ''he
must have lost his popularity What,
you are not going out in such night as
this?'
Eyes, | am, for if see that fool again
I'll have to cut his throat Good-by."
Shortly after the major left, the
colonel came down why, look here.
said he; Il growled just as you told me
70 do, and | wish may die if that fellow
didn't come within one of ripping my
life out Of me"
Mighty sorry to hear it. He must
have changed since | know'd him so
WELL
When the convention met next day
the major and the coloRel fought each
other so violently that neither of them
could win, and at an opportune time,
old John Perdue stepped in and received
the nomination. -Opie P Read in New
York World