Hopkinsville Kentuckian., 1890-12-16
EVENING UP THINGS.


l:ow Drummer I.esented q IIotcl-keep-
er's Iapacitr.
I had room next to commercial
traveller in St. Louis hotel and when
both Of us wero packing up to go after
a stay OF throe or four days, ] heard
sudden crash in his room and went in to
ascertain the cause. lie had the lounge
on It'll back and had broken of leg.
''You see," he explained, in an answer
to my look of inquiry, ~ am getting
oven with the house."
GLOW do you mean?"
"Sit down, my dear fellow" he con-
tinucd, as he reached up and cracked
one OF the gas globes with the door key.
Let us theorizo q bit. Tho object OF
MOTEL Is to furnish temporary home for
man away from his own. The idea Is
to feed and lodgo him and make him
comfortable for a money consideration.
The rate here is four dollars per day.
Did you fee the porter for bringing up
your trunk?'
"Yes."
$50 did /. That was sheer blaclmail.
Did you fec your waiter?"
"Yes."
$50 did |. Wo had to, or one wonldnt
been half waited on. That's moro black
mail How was the gas in your room?
"Very poor"
EXACTLY. 1t is turned of 50 that no
one can get half light. That's fraud
on the guests. Did you drink at the
bare"
"A glass OF beor."
"And they charged you ten cents, and
the glass was only pony. They made
fully 700 per cent. profit on that beer.
That is cxtortion. Did you have ice-
water at night?"
"Yes. two or three times"
"And you gave the bell boy dime
each time. You felt that you had to- lilo
felt that you ought to and stood waiting
for it. That was moro extortion. Did
tho mosquitoes bother you any?'
"Ycs, nearly ate mo up"
IAN why not? There's not screen Of
any sort at any window In the whole
house. In other words, tho landlord
hasn't the slightest care for your com
fort. lie won't go to the least cost OF
trouble to give you d good nights sleep
Buy any cigars in the hotel?'
YES"
"Wcll, they made from 150 to 200 POI
cont on them. Have any laundry"
"Yos."
"Well they charged you from rs to 10
per cont. above outside prices. Pcrhap
you had coupe"
"Yos."
"ordercd it through tho Office prob
ably?"
"Ycs."
"Wcll you paid from 90 to5Oper cent
above regular outside ratcs maj
took your hat at the dining-room door
IIo is stationed there to bleed the pub
lie. and he bled you. II yougot shaved
you paid twenty-five per cent. over out
sido rates Same II you got shine oil
your shoes. AS matter OF fact yo'
have been blackmailed and robbed iron
basement to top story. Now, thcn. hoy
arc you going to get even2'
) II don't know"
) '"rhen learn. have broken log OF
that lounge. The fact won't be discoy
cred for week or two. No one can So,
] broke this globe. take this bottle o
ink and pour it on the carpet and NOV
the bureau along. With my knife | ri
slit in this mattress. It's on tho unde
! eide, and won't bo seon for month.
take this paper and crowd 1t into th
overflow plpo of the wash-stand an
three or four days hence they Will hay
to call plumber. Now, with my knii
crack two of the upper panos OF thl
window. The pieces win work loose b
fore snow flies. rack these burea
!. drawers so and so, and shut them u
! and that will give the carpenter iol
: That's all, guess, and I'll leave 1t
: any fair.minded man II I have mor
| than cvened up accounts.''-N. Y. Sun,