Lewiston teller. [volume] (Lewiston, North Idaho) 1878-1900, 1890-08-14
CURRENT NONSENSE.

It is n sad fate for the self-made
man to he tied for life to tailor
made girl.
There's n silver lining to every
cloud, but there wouldn't be long
New York aldermen ever got to
heaven.
"Wlat did hubby do while his
wiley was away" asked the dear
creature on her return. 81 played
solitaire nearly every evening" he
replied, sheepishly. "Who WITH"
was the next query, in tone Of deep
suspicion.
Little Oracle had been very naughty
about something, and her mother
told her she might take her choice
between being put to bed in the day
time or being spanked. Grace thought
minute and then replied: "Bedness
is awful, but spanking is worse.
"Mu mma," said little girl as
they dragged along in the rain with
out an umbrella, ''how old is Gen.
Greely?' "Old enough to know bet
ter" snapped the mother as she
thought OF the fair-weather predic-
tons in the morning papers.
Tenant-"Landlord, our house
wall one side has sprung out about
ten feet" Landlord-"Make your
self easy. Although it probably
renders the house that much bigger
do not fear; will not raise the rent
on you. "-Philadelphia Times.
Mrs. Cumso when her new bonnet
came home)-"Why, actually, the
bird on this bonnet hasn't any BILL"
Cumso-"The bill was too large to
go on the bonnet. 1t will come sep
arately in a wheelbarrow about the
first of the month";
Mrs. Auger-'I hear they are max
ing a door with five keyholes. 1t
will be easier to unlock. You can
find it when you come home late at
night" Mr.. Auger-"Rubbish; when
l come home late one keyhole is
/ about all l care to find"
Among some old papers sent to q
i, Texas Jail for the entertainment Of
, the inmates was the election circular
of one OF the local candidates. One
of the prise ners, who has been in jail
! for over a year, looked Mt it and said:
/ "Look here, boys, this is not intend
j., ed for us. 1t is addressed TO the
, people at large That don't mean
+ u.s.
1T is queer world, sighed Jones.
t "Think so?" said Smith. 81 dom
+ think so, I know it is so! When ]
was going slowly up hill and finding
Y the way was difficult and my burden
n heavy, nobody gave me the slightest
Il assistance; but now when am going
l. down hill everybody seems willing to
give me a push"
ie "Willie," said his father, as he came
F. home at night, "have you been q
good boy?" "Did you ask mamma"
,r said Willie, doubtfully. "Don't yor
d. know" inquired the father. well
!. it's this way" explained Willie
10 "Ma's ideas and mine differ as tc
u. what is being bad, and don't want
a to 90 back on anything she might
K. say"
- Effie Ito Mrs. Belweather, who ha.
a just been speaking of Mr.. B.)-Why
W Mrs. BelweAther l thought yo'
is hadn't any husband? Mrs. B.-Why
" of course have, Ellie. Do you meal
a to say that you don't know Mr.. Bel
weather? Etfie-Yes, but dn'tsup
pose he was your husband. though
you hadn't any. Papa said youmar
ried for money, and that was all yo
~ got.
}" Her voice was harsh and she jawe
r. all day, Till her husband was Graz
~ as one may say; From morn t
night it was chin. chin, chin, An
ty people who couldn't help hearing tn
,is din Knew we'll that the man had
cross to bear. And he cried in tt
49, depth OF his wild despair, 'I'velove.
~ ~ I've loved her through good and il
~ And with all her faults l love III
- STILL"