St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1890-01-19

run human brains. Roswell p. Flower.
with his 200 pounds of flesh and bone,
has made fortune, while Jay Gould,
with 100 pounds of sinew, has
his tens of millions. McAdoo,
of New Jerseys weighs about
100 pounds and he is brainy enough.
Mckinley weighs 100, and Buchanan, of
New Jersey, kicks the beam at 225. 1t
takes 1000 ounces of flesh and bone to
make up the speakers weight, to nOur-
ish the gray matter on Tom Reeds
Uranium, and nearly the same amount
is required to supply that used up daily
carries about 155 pounds under his big
collar, and the I40 pounds of Frank
LAWYER elevated HIM from Chicago sa-
loon TO the house OF representatives.
One hundred and forty-five pounds
have sufiiced to get up Henry Cabot
Lodges biographies of statesmen,
and all of Holman's economy
is ground out under the sup
port of pure bone and sinew.
Ben ButterwOrth weighs 200, and rhe oil
of good living, as we'll as that of good
nature, shines forth from his counte-
nance. Dorsey, of Nebraska. gets
along nicely on $50 pounds and Charley
O'NeiIl, of Pennsylvania, weighs $50
and his stomach is good. The total
weight of the house of representatives
is nearly $4,000 pounds, and, at the rate
we pay for the congressional animal
show, these men cost US just $500 a
pound every year. Estimating them at
an average height of five feet eight
inches, their total height is 1870 ieet
and the average cost is nearly $500 a
foot. 1t is the dearest beef and brain
that was ever sold or hired by weight.
Congressional Albinoes.
There are two albinoes in congress
and they are both men of weight. They
are Grosvenor. of Ohio, and Brecken-
ridge, of Kentucky. Both of these men
have hair as white as newly-slacked
lime and the faces of both are AS rosy
as the setting sun. Breckenridge has a
wonderful head. He is straight and
well padded and his head is fastened by
a strong neck to pair of broad should
erS. The strands of hair are of the
finest of frosted silver and his short,
full beard is of silver bristles. He is a
handsome fellow and his blue eyes snap
and his face grows redder and his hair
seems whittier than ever when he makes
a political speech. lie is known as the
sllyer-t0ngued orator of Kentucky, and
he comes rightly by his eloquence, for
III his veins flow some of the same blood
that produced John G. Breckenridge.
He is well worth his $1,000 as a show
hgure. and he comes out into the arena
at every political tussle.
The other albinO, Charley GrosvenOr,
is now walking about the house with his
hands in his pockets. He is a straight.
good-looking, long whiskered freak. and
he has as many outside tricks worth
noting as has Mr.. Breckenridge. He is
good speaker, and is happiest when
eng ged in political fight. He strikes
from the shoulder, and delights in es-
pOuSing. the EXTREMIST views of his
party.
The Hairy and Hairless.
Speaking of hair the congressional
animal show has all kinds and colors.
There are twenty-seveD red heads i'll
this congress as there was in the last,
but the house has still its share. from
the brightest vermillion to the brick
dust hue, and from the black of DalZell.
OF Pennsylvania. to the Silky-white fuZ
of Tom Reed. Fully one-third of the
members are more or less bald. and this
badness runs all the way from the little
white spot as big as a fifty-cent piece
which now appears in the center of Ben
ButterWorth'S crown, to the vast eX.
panse of rosy-white which covers the
brains of Cole, of North Carolina.
Hit, of Illinois, needs the serv-
ices of the seven lOng-haired
sisters to revivify his scalp,
and Harry Bingham, of Pennsylvania,