The great West. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1889-18??, 1890-01-03
PROMISES OF MARRIAGE.
A Woman Tells How to Avoid Broken
Marital Vows.

10lnSS 20 30 A0ougnt Oh 0e10To 1Ouug Eco.
pie Become Engaged-some Causes Of
Broken vows-A Famous English Novelist's
Words Of Advice to the Young.
Probably the custom most discredit-
able, in the estimation of foreigners,
writes Mrs. Alexander, is the legal
right of Tilted lover to bring an &C
ton for breach of promise of marriage
against the faithless fance.
A more degraded picture of sordid
imbecility can not we'll be imag ined
than the scene presented at the trial
of such a case, where the claims for
compensation in hard cash, for wound
ed feelings, are supported by the read
ing aloud of mawkish letters teemfng
with silly pet names and terms of en-
dearment amid the laughter of the
listeners.
Such scenes arc the result of GER
tain Indebtedness in our social code
which, if it entails some inconvenience,
at least leaves us free from that grand
motherly legislation which, while
striving to provide for all possible
contingencies. only FORCES letters for
Its unfortunate subjects, cramping the
muscles which might otherwise enable
them to paddle their own canoes"
successfully into smooth waters.
The best preservative against broken
promises is deliberation in giving them
and rapidity in making them irrevoca-
BILE by the final marriage vow. So
much can be endured, so much is en-
durable, when we know there is no
way of escape, that the ''fast-and-
loose" period of a long engagement
can not be too earnestly avoided.
On the contrary. a long acquaint-
ance previous to marriage is a great
advantage; familiarity with each 9TH
er's character, tastes, family, circum-
stances (Which latter never fails to
color our lives) forms an admira BILE
concrete on which to build the founda-
lions of married life, and the most
lasting loves are those which are sup
ported by the Orders of friendship.
Indeed, glancing round at the hap
hazard way in which the all-important
and fateful relationship of marriage is
undertaken, the impression OF all sane
persons must be amazement that the
failures are not far more numerous.
Between the conflicting evidence sup
piled by experience it is difficult to
strike balance. In matrimony, as
in preaching, "God gives a different
gift to each," and it is impossible to
recommend one line of conduct above
another; but deep down in the sources
may be cultivated such qualities as
justice, self-respect regard for the
feelings of others, loyalty, truth, and
by their fruits shall life be happy, or
noble, or both.
There is certainly no fairer ideal
than the union of two young creatures
linked by true, tender, unselfsh love,
dashed with the salt of passion, clothed
with fair illusions not all unfounded
respecting each others nobility and
loneliness, and strengthened by the
bulwark of hearty comradship, facing
LIES battle hand in hand, and growing
in affection as they grow in complete
knowledge of each others Imperfect
tions as we'll as virtues.
On the whole, there is truth, though
not invariable truth, in the prove RIB,
''Marry in haste and repent at leisure. -
The masses will always be needless
and improvident; but while we depre-
cate this, we ought not to forget that
the prudent profit by their recklessness;
their failures fill up the trenches which
we must cross, and make bridges
whereby we may pass dry shod to in
creased ease and wider outlook.
What is the sum of this reverie on
'Promises of Marriage?" Very little
and that little may be epitomized in a
sentence-"Be slow in making and
faithful in keeping promise. Will
any young persons ''about to marry
or become engaged heed our words of
wisdom? II trow not;'' yet we cast
them on the waters, and though ap-
parently of small effect, they may add
their infinitesimal bulk to the slowly
accommodating mass of opinion, as the
tiny, filmy shells described by marine
explorers. floating and slowly sinking
in the vastly deep, serve to build UP
the sub-ocean ridges that are finally
upheaved to form the cliffs against
which lawless waves dash themsel YES
in vain.
Bully for the Babies on Our Block.