Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1890-01-16
HIS PEPPERS FAILEp.
The Remedy for . Man Who Saw tho
Woods Full OF Coons.

The Remedy for Man Who Saw tho
Woods FUN OF Coons.
Doctor" said red-faced and watery-
eyed man from Wayne township, as he
came in DR.. Babcock's Office in Ham
mondsport, N. Y, the other day, "I'm
afraid my eyes is goin' back on me, and
dropped in to kind o. see If can find
out where they're lame" s@aI... i..
"AhW said the doctor. 'What seems
to be the matter with your eyesP"
"That's what don't know" replied
the man; Shut they played me q trick
tother day that don't leave no room for
doubt but what there's somethin' out O.
gear with 'em, somehow. I'll give you
the symptoms. Maybe you don't know
that I'm quite coon hunter, but am.
T'other day my boy b~ught one o. these
britch-loadin' and repeatin' shotguns,
and I told him I'd go out and see how it
d work on coon. I went out, and
hadn't gone more than mile up the hill
before seen big coon pop on to the
limb OF chestnut tree. He came
there 80 sudden that I couldn't get it
through me where he had come from or
how he got there. But didn't stop to
ask no questions, but up and blazed
away. Now I've got the name over our
way, Doc, OF never missin' any thing
I shoot at, and of course when pulled
up and whanged away at that coon ex-
pected TO see him tumble, but he didn't.
When the smoke clear away he sot
there jest as he waa when
seen him first. was surprised,
now, tell you. I thought it was
the guns fault, but bIazed away
again. The coon never moved.
happened to look, somehow Or other, at
tree of to the right of the one the
coon was In, and there sot another coon
ON limb. I thought I'd try my luck
on him, and 30 l let him have shot.
He never stirred. begun to git mad
by this time, and durin' little CONVEX
sation was hsvin' with myself about
the gun happened to glance ct tree
to the left Of the first tree, and there on
limb was another coon. I tried INV
luck on the third coon, and didn't hit
him no more than did t'other two. I
looked at the first tree; there w.s that
coon, settin' right where he was when
first seen him. looked at the second
tree, and there was that coon, still on the
limb. l turned my head toward another
tree, and there seen fourth coon, and
lookin' around me whichever way I
might, every tree seen had q coon in
it, and all as fat as coons could be.
got wild.
'Thunderi' I hollered; here's the
woods full o. coon, and hain't got
nOthin' but this new-fangled gun that
won't hit barn.
"But begun to blaze away as fast as
the gun could spit cartridge, fust at
one coon and then at another, until
every darn load was emptied out O. that
gun, and hadn't dropped coon. was
jist agoin' TO slst that gun to flinders
against tree, when happened to rub
my eye, and when I took my hand down
there on my hrger was . nice. jolly, fat
wood-louse. l looked up, but every
coon was zone. The fact o. the matter
is, Doc, that wood.louse had been hsngin'
on to one Of my eye-winkers all the
time, and I thought was seein' coons.
Be I gittin' near-sighted or is the optic
nerve doublin' up on me2"
Neither ono, said the doctor. "Have
the hind pocket In your hunting pants
cut down from quart size to half-pint,
and you'll be all right"
The man went out shaking his head
and said he'd think about It.
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