The morning call., 1890-10-03
+" OUR CLUB"


"OUR CLUB"
The BacheIette Tells How Refractory
Members Were Brought to Terms.
Editor Woman's Column. Morning Call:
"Our Club" met last week. for the first
time after the summer vacation, and it has
occurred to me that possibly an account of
its proceedings would interest some so l
will jot down my notes while still fresh in
my mind.
1t las at last dawned upon the world that
as men enjoy asSociatng themselves to-
gether, unhampered by the presence OF
mothers, wives and Sweethearts, so women
may enjoy asSociating themselves together
unhampered by the presence Of fathers, hus-
bands or brothers; and so, from SOrosis OF
New York to the Century Club of San Fran
cisco, wCman's clubs stretch in federated
union across the continent, atfording to the
intelligent infinite resources OF help, conf
partnership and impi Ovement. But, while
men have generally established their clubs
for pleasure or for politics, and "have built
them stately mansions" for social enjoyment,
women have almost invariably chosen an
other plan, different, if not better, and have
organized for works Of benevolence or for
mental Improvement. They meet to inves-
tgate the most abStruse subjects, 10 study
Browning or biology, to plan graver works
Of charity; to listen to Ramabal OF the HIM
doc child-widow, or TO study the micrUcosm;
and they have steadily set their faces against
any qualification of the appeties, even glass
of lemonade. Instead of W ordsworth's plan,
plain living and high thinking" it is thigh
thinking" and no living at all Take second
thought ladies, and let us have at least
cup of tea and sandwich, lest we faint by
the waySde," and there be cause for at-
other much-intialed Society for the Pre-
vention of Cruelty in Women's Clubs"
Well. in organizing ''Our Club" we de-
cided, after due consideration, To concede
the fact that women have bodies as well rs
souls and minds, and try to combine the ad-
vantages of both plans. The result is very
delightful for uS-''great few as the chill
dren Say-and if we had not
HIDDEN OUR LIGHT UNDER BUsHEL,
SO far, and women know how enjoyable
such an association is, there would be Our
Clubs" Nos. ., 3, etc., sprin2ing up in all
directions.
We meet fortnightly at / o'clock in the
afternoon and devote an hour to general
business, which includes invariably some
form Of charity. in which we lend hand
to some unhappy woman, and it does not
matter What has caused her unhappinesS.
We do not take the Levite's liberty and
pass by on the other SIDE" for any cause.
We are all sinners and sisters, daughters of
the same King.
We then take recess and pass into the
dinlng-room, where we chat, frollc and ENJOY
The most delicious luncheon which the lady
of the house can provide. | had forgotten
to say that we meet at one anotherS houses
in rotation. As soon as we are rich enough
we intend to have a clubhouse of our own
and any millionaire who wishes to contrib
ute toward our building fund can send his
6 Fur NCr ~ In
rewarded by unanimous election as honor
airy absentee.
After luncheon, soothed. refreshed, aud
in that mellow mood of good nature sure to
follow choice meal, we return to the par
lors sufficiently amiabe to stand listening to
one another'S papers without visible en-
nut.
Those papers! They are on all sorts of
subjects. There is but one restrictlon-they
must be on the topics of the day-live sub
jects; nothing about sarcophagi or num-
mics, RameseS III or the caye-dWellers. We
are much more interested in the nineteenth
century ''toilers of the sea- than i'll the
builders OF the pyramids; in the President
of the United States than Nebuchadnezzar.
In short, we will have nothing with the
mold of decay on it in Our Club"
And now | come to our Specialty-fOr we
have a speciality, or this report would not
have been written. We are great students
of parliamentary law. In the very begin
DluE We utltlluil iltNGl W nave
THE MULTIPLICATION OF REPORTING
Some proceeding at home, to be met with
that eXasperating smile of masculine SUPERB
0rity and the pleasant remarks, That is no
way to put the moti0n-you should do SO
ana So''; or, You were entirely out of or
DER or, Il suppose you all talk at once; it
must be perfect babel" etc.
SO we studied-yes, actually studied-our
manuals Every lady has her Roberts, or
her Cushing and though at first, the per-
petual obiector book in hand, was some
what tircSOme, we worked away together
and now, though possibly we make some
niStake-errare humanum-we have con-
quered that delightful freedom which comes
only with order, and are pretty well up
in parliamentary law. Our officers could, |
believe, preside with dignity AMI discretion.
over almost any body, except the United
States House of Representatives, and | am
not sure after the last meeting, but they
could even manage that.
At this meeting, the first business before
us concerned a matter Oh which there was
deep feeling and vital difference of opinion
| Being a matter pertaining to cur private
charities, it cannot be stated here, but the
subject is net of consequence Neither
party had been idle during vacation votes
had been canyassed, our 'whippers i'm had
been out; we of the affirmative knew that
we had majority of two and we're accord
ingly jubilant. But. as the President who
was Of our party, cast her bright eyes around
the rooms, they were troubled. Three OF
our number had sailed away on summer
seas and though their steamer was due at
IL O'Clock in the morning, n provoking wind
was blowing from somewhere and their
seats were vacant.
However, the club was called to order
and, after the transaction of some uninl-
portant business, the casuS belli, which was
III order and could not be deferred, was pre-
sented by our brightest member in little
speech so wise and witty and pathetic that
it was enough to move stone. But de-
termined woman sometimes has heart
harder than adamaut. The question was
put without debate, a rising vote was taken
and behold, not Il member Of the opposition
moved from her chair! There they sat- like
smiling statues, and then the dreadful fact
DAMNED UPON Us.
They were going ito filibuster," and were
playing the fast act in that little political
comedy entitled: 'How 10 Be Present and
Absent at the Same Time"
Our President, however. is not to be taken
unawares, and, turning to the Secretary,
said: Count as present Mrs. - and
Call the rollv' Call the roll!'' resounded
tumultuousy from all sides.
The roll-call began, when, presto, change!
With tutter of ribbons and rustic of silen
plumage, out into the long hall focked
every member of the opposition, and there
they stood, leaning against the walls or sit
ting on the stairs, laughing AT our discom-
hture. There was no quorum now. Grad
ually the absenteeS Sauniered back, but by
the time they had again taken their seats
the President (who had mysteriously disap-
peared for a few moments) returned to the
chair and another exodus had taken place
during second r0ll-cali, saYory Odors began
to steal through the house and the pretty
maid appeared at the door with the welcome
words Madame is served"
The President, at whose house the meet
ing was he'd, with seeming Qt was only
seeming) f0rgetfuness, failed to announce
the result, but made motion toward the
dining-roOm, which was carried unanimously,
and we all repaired to the dining tables.
The delightful, old-fashiUped house in
Nlicl We met has q very LONG. low DINING