The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-08-03
LOCAL HUMOR.

The mayor says he is sure to be reelected.
Il am so well supported he says that fall
CAN'T"
DEN TURN1PA," said the Yamacraw Italian
vegetable dealer, lis rutabaga, but dis sacka
potata is bag-o'-rOota."
IRELAND" yelled the blatant anti-home
ruler, lis Synonymous with murder" He
probably only meant that 1t was ASSASSINATION.
AN EDUCATED PARROT "A Broughton street
parrot devourei several pages of dictionary
the other day, and now speaks only in polly
syllables
Col. YAMAcRAw- What do you think of young
Pulaski, my dear, as match for our Elfrida:
Mrs. Yamacraw (doubtfully)-I-d don't -
know He is little too loose-I-fear for
safety.
TIE WORST YET-'Mr Hall, " said Miss Prue
DISH, won't you read something to me-"
q. certainly" r.splied Mr.. Hodgson Hall;
Il would like that lovely poem about Gray's
limb"
ABOUT Gray's -- oh, yes" and he grayely
proceeded to read Gays Elegy.
ALGY AND PRIsclLLA-AN IDYL.-"Une pen
dule, don't Le SUjet etatt PdmOur fdlsdnt pGsser
te temps, on le teJDS pdsser fdis1nt rdmoltr je
ne sctS troD tequet "-fd7tthier
AS Algy tn Priscilla still de avs,
Unhee1ed passeth the swiftly flying days.
Quoth youthful love to hoary time: Aha
See how make you pass my grlndpapaM
NAS I'LL 0iO W.T. 1nN cONNLol ihOhIuo ndNG
The dragging hours to lingering days have
grown,
Qloth heavy age TO youthful love: Ohio!
You saucy boy, see how | make you GO"
He UNDERSTOOD - Mai. Pulaski Yes.
bought that tract on the Iybee road, but it cost
pile of money, and had to soak some of my
Bay street property to pay for it.
Jimmy Yamacraw-Had to soak it, Maj. Pu-
Mai Pulaski-Ye5, my boy; you don't under
stand that 10 you?
Jimmy--No; but 'xpect that's what ma was
talking about to-day.
Mrs. Yamacraw-Me? Why. Jimmy, you
never heard me speaSing of Maj. Pulaski's bust
ness affairs.
Jimmy-well, you said Maj Pulaski was a
regular old soaker.
us THERE gentleman from Georgia in the
carr"
With his usual urbanity Maj. Pulaski arose
Yes, sir, he said, Il am from Savannah"
From Savannah! that's still better Then,
sir" stepping brskly forward, may trouble
you for your corkscrew moment?"
An explosion of laughter greeted the old
chestnut, but the major was equal to the occa-
hand in his pocket as though to seek the desired
Implement and then paused. Excuse me, " he
said, . ay ask what state you are FROM"
OH am from Ohio"
Then, sir, replied the major, as he calmly
resumed his seat, Il am sorry cannot acc )mmo-
date you; but every time that have loaned my
corkscrew-or in fact, anything else-to an
Ohio man. it was the last ever saw of it,"
WELL KEPT ACCOUNTS. -Uncle Absalom keeps
a leading Yamacraw cigar store. One evening
several of his chums were seated with him be-
hind the counter commenting on his apparently
large business and consequent prosperity
Yes, replied Uncle Alb. thoughtfully rub
bling his nose trade is good. but somehow l
don't seem to get ahead much"
Just then rather hard looking citizen came
in md asked for some cigars. Uncle Alb laid a
box before him; he took two handfulls, and as he
put the cigars in his pocket remarked that
makes ST.
Yes, ah yes" said Uncle Ab; ST."
who is that, ABB" asked a chum as the
customer went out.
Il don't know"
you don't know! Then how do you keep his
ACCOUNT"
II don't keep his account, replied Uncle Alb,
cheerfully, he keeps it,"