Los Angeles herald., 1890-11-01
INGERSOLL AND THE BIBLE.
How He Caused the Purchase of One
in Printing House.

IN Printing House.
Probably nobody will be more sur
prised at the story which follows than
the big-hearted and genial Colonel bob"
Ingersoll himself.
Strange as 1T may seem, 1t is never
theless the solemn truth that Colonel
Ingersoll was the cause.-the direct and
certain cause of the purchase of a
Bible in one of the printing offices of the
country. The office is situated not
1000 miles from the carved figure OF JUS
tice on the dome of the New York City
hall. To tell just where - we'll, that
would be another story, as Rudyard
Kipling would remark.
This Plain Tale from Printing Office
begins with the circumstance that Col.
Ingersoll once upon time wrote an ar
ticIe in which he had occasion to make
a quotation from the Bible. 1t is COM
monty believed that he is fonder of fall
ing foul OF that book and criticising it
with relentless ferocity than he is of
quoting from it. But this time he ex-
tracted verse from the Old Testament
in order to add point and emphasis to
the argument he was making.
Taking the colonel's unfamiliarity
with the Bible for granted, the proof
reader, when he came to the quotation,
instantly surmised that something was
wrong. In fact, the suspicion was
born in him that the quotation was not
correct. He therefore reached out for
the Office Bible in order to verify his sus-
picons or else 10 send it whistling down
to the wind.
1t was the first time in years that any
one in the Office had had occasion to
consult the Bible. Quotations from it
had come and quotations had gone-all
on the general principle that they must
be all right since they had been used as
a rule by ministers; and if ministers
could not quote the Bible correctly,
surely it was not the business of the
proofreader to correct them.
When the proofreader in qeustion
reached out his hand to pick up the
Bible, and prove or disproye Colonel In
gersoll's familiarity with the book, he
was somewhat astonished to find that
he could not find it. A brief examina-
ton of the reference books at hand
showed that the Bible was not among
them. The general utility boy of the
Office was then summoned and ordered
to produce the Bible instanter.
The boy grumbled something to the
effect that he thought he had seen it
summer afore last" With not very
good grace he began to overhaul pile
of dust-covered books and papers in
which it was supposed that the missing
book might be concealed. He discov-
cred fragment of French dictionary,
Tribune almanac OF the early seven
ties, an old Atlantic Monthly, a few torn
passages Of an encyclopedias Of an early
date, and other more or less worthless
odds and ends of things. But no Bible.
The boy emerged from his quest in
sorry-looking condition. His bands,
face and clothing were smeared with
dust so thickly that it was several days
before he began to resume his normal
appearance. He had certainly merited
success in his search, though he had not
won it.
The proprietor of the office was then
consulted. He was positive, he said,
that they had had Bible number of
years before. Indeed. he had had occa-
sion to consult it once-he couldn't re-
member for what, or when, for that
matter-but it certainly was as much as
nine or ten years ago. What had hap
pened in the meantime he couldn't say.
The Office certainly ought to have
Bible, but as he had bought one and the
men do not think enough of it to take
vesting in another.
come interested by this time. The
search had already occupied nearly half
a day. The question was broached of
taking up a subscription to supply the
needed book but one man suggested
ha ~ hn 10 e
the pitiful condition to which the Office
had found itself reduced, it would be
glad to send down an agent with a
Bible as free gift. This idea found
little favor, however, as it was thought
that member in the society's annual
report OF the fact that "The - print
ing Office had been supplied with one
Bible, it being found to be without a copy
of the Sacred Word" would not be pre-
cisely the sort of advertisement that
the proprietor would like to see.
Finally the head proofreader, with a
sudden access of generosity, declared
that he would supply the Office with
Bible at his own cost. He stopped at
well-known bookstore the next day and
asked for the cheapest Bible they had.
The cheapest proved to be an English
edition with gilt edges; the cost was
thirty cents. He might have got
cheaper one, he said, if he had taken
the time to look further, but still he
thought he could go thirty cents on it.
When Colonel Ingersoll reads this he
will learn how it came about that he
was the immediate, though unwilling,
cause of the purchase OF thirty cent
Bible.
1t may interest him and the "gentle
reader as well, to know that the quota
ton which aroused the proofreader's
suspicion was not correctly made in the
colonePs manuscript. - New York