davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18
Too Much Shade.
Gro BE CONTINUED

Houses in places otherwise unex-
ceptionable are often so closely over
hung with trees rs to be in n state
ofhumidity, by preventing n free cir
culation of air, and by obstructing
free admission of the suns rays.
Trees growing against the walls OF
houses, and shrubs in confined places
near dwellings, are injurious also, as
favoring humidity; ut u proper dis
tance, on the other hand, trees are
favorable to health. On this prin-
ciple, says DR.. james Clark, it may
be understood how tho inhabitants
of one house suffer from rheumatism,
headache, dyspepsia, nervous atlcc-
tions, and other consequences of liv-
ing in confined, humid atmosphere.
while their nearest neighbors, whose
houses are otherwise situated, en-
joyed good health; and even how one
side OF large building, fully exposed
to the sun and to q free circulation
of air, may be healthy, while the 9th
er side, overlooking damp, shaded
courts or gardens. is unhealthy.
Humid, confined situations, subject
to great alterations of temperature
between day and night, are the most
dangerous of all the physical quail
ties of the air, and humidity in gen.
eral is the most injurious to human
life. Dryness, with n free circulation
of mir, and u full exposure to thesun,
are the material things to he attend
ed to in choosing a residence.-Med
ical Classics.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18
The Imprisoned Duck.

a young duck, by some accident,
had its leg broken, and the wounded
limb having been put in splints. the
duck was placed under 81 small crate
or rallied coop, to prevent it, for II
time, from running about. Thcpoor
prisoner looked very forlorn in this
cage, and was evidently an object OF
pity to it's brothers and sisters
around. They tried to release their
companion by forcing their necks iin-
der the crate and SO lift it. but the
effort was beyond their strength.
On nscertaining this, they held aeon
sultation and then they marched
away in a body. Presently they re-
appeared with all the ducks belong
Ing to the farm yard, amounting to
about forty.
Alter great deal otquacking they
surrounded the crate. and every neck
was inserted under the lowest rail;
they then made Il united effort to
raise the crate, but alas! in vain:
'hcii "tl'i. gu hdS uol sulilSIeIG. Au-
other consultation was now held,
and, after another storm OF quack-
ing, the whole of them came to one
side of the crate; as many ms posi-.
bly, could now thrust their necks be-
Meath the rail, the rest pushing them
forward from behind. This time
they succeeded: the crate was raised,
their imprisoned friend was liberated,
and noisy were the greetings she re-
ceived as she limped, once more free.
into their midst.-New York Mail
and Express.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18
Curiosities of the Postage
Stamp,

There are about 5000 varieties of
postage stamps now in use by the
different nations Of the world. The
museum of the Berlin postotlice alone
contains a collection of between
1000 and 5000 specimens. half of
which are European and the remain
der divided between the Americas
Asia. Africa and Australia. The
emblems upon the stamps OF nations
are legion: he earth, the sea, and
the vaulted canopy above us
have been ransacked for curious and
meaningless devices and legends.
The entire animal Kingdom, the
stars. and the moon in oil itsphases,
besides legendary emblems by the
thousand. are known to the collec-
tors OF stamps, who pride themselves
upon being "p hilatelists." Upon the
printed faces of these little squares
Of paper, may be found the cfiigies OF
five eInperors, eighteen kings, three
queens, one grand duke, several in
terior title rulers, and many prcsi-
dents. NJ. Philippe de Farrari per-
laps has the largest and most vnlu-
able collection ofstamps in the world.
amounting to something like $780,
600, and within the present year he
sold one single little stamp to col.
lector in Paris for $4,000.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18

ness, said Brand. gaily; "for dinner will
soon be ready. and We have no time to
lose. How stands the account?"
The papers are on board tho fclucca, and
it will be more convenient. when the settle-
M"nt is made, to come on board with the
MONEY. How would tomorrow morning
d.? There's no hurry"
"Jast ~ You please, friend Of nv heart!
The danbloona, or the silk; or brOadcloth
is ready for you at any moment. Pay You
III anything except the delicious wines of
France. Bueno!" he added, pulling out q
splendid gold repeater, with marqaiss
coronct on the chased back. "Aud now,
amigo. accept this little token into the bar.
gain"
Don Ignacio's fiery eyes twinkled with
greed; hut it was only for . moment, when,
giving quick glance at the coronet and
coat of arms, he waved his forefnger gent
ly to and fro. aud shook his head.
What? No! Why yBu know It once
belonged to the Captain General Of Cuba,
old Tol de rol de riddle rol-what WAS his
name? He gave it me, you know, together
with some other trinkets. for saving his life
-a-you remember2 Very generous old
gentleman-nobleman, iLdeed-he was.
May no live thousand years or more, il
he CAM"
Ay, Don Ignacio did remember the cir
cumstance attending that generous transac-
tion. and he remembered to have heard also
TINT the captain general made a present Of oil
his money and jewels with the point OF u
broad blade quiyering ut his throat. He
said nothing, however, in allusion to this
interesting episode. but he smiled mean-
ingly, and went on with his cigar.
Not take it. Ell? Well, amigo, must
look you ur something else; but now for
dinner. Babette, clear away for dinner.
Here are the keys of the wine-cellar The
best, my beauty, and plenty of it, Then
turning to his companions; Suppose we
take IL stroll to the Tigers Trap; the sun is
sinking. aud q walk will give us an appo-
titc for the turtle soup-vamapos!
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18
Cabby Found Asleep.

"A somnolcnt cabman was enjoying
u comfor table nap OH his box, in the
Rue de Metz when an cnterprisin"
person came along, cut the reins. un-
harnessed the steed OF the sleeping
Jehu, mounted the animal and tried
to gallop it up the Fnubourg Saint
Martin. The nag, however, was al
most as sleepy us it's master, anu re-
fused to proceed at n pace fast enough
to enable the street brigand to get
away
The cabman having been aroused
from his slumbers by IL good Samar-
itan who had observed the tibet, rub
bed his eyes and tried to ornament
his face with Il feeble smile, which was
accompanied by n muttercd malcdic-
ton. At length, deeming energy
imlmratively necessary. cabl'y seized
his whip and proceeded briskly after
the disappearing anneXer OF nags,
was ultimately conducted to n po-
lice station, where he treated the
adventure as n pure joke. This
species of horse play was, how
ever, neither rclislled by the victimiz-
ed cnbman nor by the police, who
sent the thief to the lockup.-Lon-
don Telegraph.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18
Wonderful Mechanism.

The Bank of England's doors are
now SO finely balanced that IL clerk
by pressing a knob under his desk,
can close the outer doors instantly,
and they cannot he opened again en-
cept by special process. This isdone
to prevent the daring and ingenious
unemployed of the great metropolis
from robbing this famous institution.
The bullion departments of this and
other great English banking estal,-
lishments are nightly submerged in
several feet OF water by action of
machinery. In some OF the London
banks the bullion departments are
connected with the managers Sleep
ing rooms, and an entrance cannot
be effected without setting off an
alarm near that PERSONS head. II u
dishonest official, during either day
or night, should take even rs much
as one from n pile of Il thousand
sovereigns the whole pile would in
stantly sink pool of water take its
place, beside letting every person in
the establishment know of the theft
st. Louis Republic.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18

clincd his hend to ono side, and gave a
slight clack to his lips. rs if to illustrate. in
" humorous way, II man choking 10 death,
with u knotted rome under his ear. "lIow-
ever, We must be more cautious i'll future,
and retrieve the past disasters. for there
arc still OH the sea as good barks us ever
hoated."
Captain Brand said this rs if he was u
merchant OF largo means and strict integ-
rity, and WAS about to enter into some
sl,rewd commercial speculation.
Hunt" mumured Senior Iguacio while
pouring out another little glass OF nnisette.
Amigo milo! you had better read the pa
pers from Havana before you talk Of m
other cruise"
"Oh! delighted to read tho news; quite
refreshingto get peep Mt tho world after
being cooped up here for months! An
other French revolution! Bonaparte alive
yet! A patriot war! Nelson aud Villen-
euye! All interesting!"
Thus glancing rapidly over tho prints.
pausing at times at a paragraph that ar
rested his attention, then tossing paper
away and taking up another, till suddenly
Captain Brands hand shook with passion
Us he read aloud
His Britannia Majesty's squadron has
been Augmented OH the West India station.
The brig Fire. Fly. corvettes Croker and
Joker, touch at Nassau, New Providence,
OH the End instant. bound to leeward. We
also learn that tho United States have fit
ted out u squadron OF small vessels, called
the Mosquito Fleet. to search for the noted
pirate Brand, who has so long committed
atrocities among the.islands. He wus last
chased by the American corvette Scourge,
oft MUrant BAY, on the east coast of Jamaica.
but escaped during the night. The follow
ing day shattered boat was picked up,
which has been cut adrift from the piratical
schooner, containing several dead and
dying hodies of the pirates. One of the
later gave such information to the captain
of the Scourge as leads to the hope that
Bnnd'S retreat may soon be discovered lad
his nest of pirates be destroyed. Recent
advices from Principe state that vessel
loaded with valuable merchandise stuck on
the Cavaloo Reef and went down. The
crew, however, five in number. were res
cued, but on landing were identified by the
mate of the English bark Trident as por-
tion Of the men who robbed that vessel and
murdered the master and several Of tho
passengers. Our readers may remember
that among the latter were two sisters, who
leaped overheard aud were drowned in or
der to save themselves the horror Of more
cruel fate. Tho men alluded to, who were
wrecked in the brig off Principe, were sent
i'll chains TO Havana, and were yesterday
publicly garrotted in the Plaza of Moro
Castle"
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18
A Clear Monopoly.

The other forenoon IL messenger
boy was going up Woodward avenue
stopped for Il moment i'm the shade
ofone of the Circuspark naples. He
was sopping up the sweat on his face
and hands, when an ice-wagon came
along.
Gimme IL hmk!" called the boy.
The driver shook his head.
alt may prevent sunstroke," con-
tinued the boy.
"T 1,, 10 cents,' replied the driver.
'"rllen femme ride"
The driver shook his head.
ut may save my life."
"For 5 cents" grimly replied the
driver.
"rhat's n clear monopoly. and
here goes to down ity' sai, the boy,
and he hit the driverin the back with
a stone and escaped.-Detroit Free
Press.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18
"whatn question to ask your pious and

"Whatn question to ask your pious and
devout Padre Ricardo
"Aguestion you'll find it difficult to an
swer, "retorted the Doctor, us he opened n
book lying on the table before him, and put
an end to the dialogue His COMPANION
quietly helped himself toa measure Of pure
gin, and unclapsed the covers of his richly.
bound missal.
Scarcely, however, had their conversation
ceased when hoarse hum of macy voice.
was heard in the direction sfthe shed with.
out, mingled with sho. Is of uproarious
laughter.
"Look!" cried the doctor, looking out of
an open window; "the people have knocked
of work and aro coming home to their sup
per. They seem tc have brought sor,e Of
the crew Of the fclucca with them too. We
shall have loud night Ut it, for the captain
has sent them pipe of wine and o barrel of
rum to carouse with"
"Pobre Citos! They have had a hard time
Oft daring tho summer; short Of rum, and
Waterloo, Ihear, and they need rcfreshment
and repose. So many of mypoor flock kill
ed too by that savage American corvette, and
Inotnea to administer the last consolation
ana holy rites, sighed the padre, as he kiss
ed the crucitix and bowed his head, There
wv
refused the sacrament intidel MS he was, the
day before he sailed; but what turtle-soup
he msde" Tho Padre thereupon sighed
deeply again, but whether for the loss of the
Iascar or tho soup no one knows.
The noise without increased; the rattle of
crockery. the blinking of glasses, the NOV
ing of feet. anda all the sounds OF hungry,
boisterous sailors ut table. Soon, too u
shout or cheer would be heard, then verse
ola song, roa.s of laughter. and now and
then the tinkle of a guitar struck by vigor-
GUS fingers in waltz or fandago.
"AIerci!" muttered the doctor, as he look
ed compassionately at the sick child on the
bed; those noisy devils will, fear, disturb
the little boy, and it's too hot here, Padre,
for the sick child"
Tits warm, my son!" he replied, as his
thick. unctuous lips parted with smile ut
his companions allusion to another and
hotter place; "but think our good Capitano
would have u cot slung for my little priest in
the saloon of the big building there. tits al-
ways cool on the crag, you know"
"Ah!perhaps he will! said the doctor, re-
fectively; "Tll see aboutit."
Stepping again to the bedside of tho little
sufferer, he laid n hand gently on his fore
head, where the soft curls lay in confusion
abou: lis temples, and then quickly touch
ing his pulse he regarded HIM attentivelr for
few moments, while at tho same time n
light glow of Precipitation came fainlly over
the innocent face and spread itself down the
neck.
His fever is breaking!" whispered the
doctor to the padre; his breath is regular
and heis sleeping sweetly. Now, if you like.
We will 60 to see the captain: and if he con-
sents, will carry the child when he wakes
to tho dwelling" The doctor carefully
closed the door of tho room as he and his
companion s;eppedo out into the open court
yard and moved towards the spacious sheds
beyond.
Gro BE CCNTINUED.)
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18
Am Unslnkable substanoe.

One of the most remarkable pro.
ducts OF French ingenuity, at the
present time, is a fibrous substance
called cellulose, and which, by some
secret mechanical process, is obtained
from the ordinary cocoauut husk.
When compressed its specific gravity
is far less than that of cork-it is
claimed, indeed, that it is the lightest
solid known, and, therefore, Of pecu-
liar value for life belts and the mat
tresses while in large quantities it's
buoyancy would render a large ves-
sci absolutely non.sinkable. 1t is
adapted to the filling ofcompnrt-
ments in u ships side, in this way
serving to prevent water entering
through n hole made by projectiie
or rock, for the simple reason that
the instant the water enters the cellu-
lose is expanded by it to an ilnpene-
trable tightness; it does not decay or
emit any odor, and has been packed
in n ships compartments without
undergoing change of any descrip-
ton. If, too, IL muss of this cellulose
be penetrated by IL projecetile it will
not he ignited by thefriction.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18
What Led to This Dream?

One night a lawyer sat in his office
troubled over u case, the keystone Of
which was u bit of testimony locked
in the breast of a certain witness
whose present place OF residence was
unknown. The lawyer had been do
ing good deal OF work and was
worn out. He folded his arms on
the table, laid his head upon them
and went to sleep. 1t was only for q
moment, but in that moment he saw
his witness standing at the shaft of
q lead mine and asking for work.
That was oil, and the lawyer awoke
and went on with his preparations
for trial. But that trivial dream,
which he had at first forgotten, came
back again with u curious persis-
tency, and lie at last gave it atten-
ton. That man at IL lead mine
where? Somehow Joplin, Mo-, sug-
gested itself to him. He concluded
to waste dollar in telegraphing,
and found in five hours time that
his much wanted witness was there,
-wor king in lead mine. Now, what
led to that dream?-Chicago Herald
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18
Good Deal Married.

The dispatches have reported the
case OF much-married Mrs. Weston,
of Providence. This is her story:
According to her statement the Rev.
Charles Weston is q marriage mani
nc, that is. he is ever seeking to be
married, never insisting upon a new
bride. but being perfectly content
with Mrs. Weston in that role. Ow-
ing to this matrimonial mania Mrs.
Weston says her married life has
been one long narrowing honeymoon.
They were first married Mt the little
town OF Millbrook, in Wisconsin and
according to the forms of the Meth
odist church. Europe was selected
for u honeymoon tour, and while in
Dublin he told her he thought their
marriage was not enthusiastically
perfect because the parson who
united them had not been ordained
by apostolic imposition of hands.
He held that it was absolutely nec-
essary, and made arrangements for
another marriage in st. Patrick's
Cathedral, Dublin. She thought
him over scrupulous, but consented,
and there was another wedding. On
their return home in the steamer he
discovered another flaw. He had
learned that st. Patrick's Cathedral
had once been II Catholic cathedral:
that the mass had been sung there,
and that the cathedral had not been
rededicated since it ceased to be used
for Roman Catholic worship. This
omission he held to be fatal and an.
other marriage Was ordered. Then
he forced her to be married on board
ship by Il Presbyterian minister, Rev.
James Monroe. Attendance ut one of
lngersoll's lectures, where John Cal
vim was denounced, convinced him
that his marriage was illegal. Mar
riages by Baptists, Unitarians, Swed-
enborgians and Spiritualists then
followed, and then, II year ago, his
wife got weary, left him and removed
to Providence. where she is now liv-
ing with her sister. She has had q
letter from her husband telling her
that he has ascertained beyond all
possible doubt that n Congregations
al marriage is the only one that has
the endorsement ofheaven, and that
il she will but consent to wedding
in Congregational church lie will
forgive her flight, and promises that
this shall be positively the last nup-
tials he will ask her to participate
in. Well, she won't do it.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18
Shakespeare Servants.

From Chambers journal.
In the time of Shakespeare domes.
tic service was in n state of transi-
ton; the old system was dccaying,
the new one springing into life; and
if one may be allowed to Judge from
casual references scattered through
out the plays of the poet, the new
order does not appear to have been
altogether satisfactory. In "king
Lear'-to take an example-Kent
denounces Oswald. the steward, as u
"knave, n rascal, and eater OF bro
ken meats: q base, proud, shallow,
beggarly, three-suitcd, 1OO-pound,
notwithstanding knave" From
Shakespeare's plays, it further APP
pears that the servants of the period
were companions and coniidants OF
their master, and that they were gen.
orally sly and offering, and players
OF practical jokes. In great families
it was customary for servants to
take an oath of fidelity on their en-
trance into office. Posthumous al
lu1es to the usage when he SAYS of
lmogene's servants:
Her attendants are
All sworn and honorable"
The condition of servants at this
period was therefore peculiar. and ii
is clear that they were ruled by n
curious mixture of stern discipline
and great laxity. One mode ofcn-
forcing obedience was 10y imposing
torfeits or fines, some of which are
enumerated by Sir j. Harrington in
his "Nug;r Antiqum." For being alb
sent from prayers, for uttcring an
oath. for leaving n door open, or
for any follower visiting thccook,"
Il fine was inflicted, while in another
set OF rules it is provided that
"lf anyone this rule doth break
And cut more bread than he can eat,
Shall to the box one penny pay
In any case an offender should rr-
fuse to pay "direct without resist
ance," provision is made at the con-
clusion that
Each one here shall be assistance,
And lie that doth refuse to aid.
Ivy linn one penny shall be paid"
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18
Preferred His Own Importa-
ton,

Col. Reynolds was wounded. Iii.
thigh was shattered by ball, hnG
after grave and protracted consul
tation the surgeons info rmed TIL,
brave Irishman that his leg must be
amputated in order to save his life
He was true grit to the backbone,
and protested against this strongly.
Cant you cure the leg?" he pleaded.
The surgeons shook their heads, and
one of them informed him that it
would not be SO bad after all, us Ii,
could wear q cork leg. cts q Cork
leg l have now" he replied, with a
grim smile, "and think great deal
Of it because l imported it myself
imported it from Ireland. Chicago
Herald.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18
Providence Knows Best.

An English author spent twelve
years on the manuscript ola book on
the history of dead lnces. When it
was finished his dog atcit up, and, in
his despair, the man almost died.
Six months later he discovered that
he was all wrong in most Ofhis state
ments and Deductions. and that the
publication of the book would have
made him n laughing stock.-Detroit
Free Press.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18
Men are Vain, Too,

"Talk about the vanity ofwomen,"
said the photographer, you ought
to work in gallery and note the
vanity of men. Women are nowhere
in comparison.
"Indeed."
"Why, n woman will come here to
have her picture taken-that's the
way they put it-and, outside of a
good deal of chattering. she's as
easy to handle as a marble statue:
but q MAXWELL, he's different. The
homlier he is the hnndsomer he thinks
himself, and the way he will kick
about the position, and light and
shade is enough to make n man give
up tho business and drive q horse.
carr
"Are they all alike"
"Pretty nearly. There isn't much
of a muchncss between them. I'd
sooner take n whole invoice of babies
any time than one man who thinks
himself pretty and even admires the
wnrt OH his nose. "-Philadelphin In
quirer.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18
A Long Island Husband.

A Long Island florist hasjust been
brought up into police court for
shooting ut his wife because she de-
clined to continue working in the
fields, blowing, narrowing, etc., and
because she finally rebelled against
cleaning out the stables. The florist
remarked that she was his wife and
he would do what he liked with her,
but the police justice does not seem
to be ofhis opinion.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-07-18
Killed in Battle in the Last 35
Years.

"Did you ever think how few peo.
pie are killed during wars?" asked
Thomas Sloane OF Boston as he sat
in the Colonnadclastevenin@. "Well,
here is IL memorandum l made re-
GENTLY regarding deaths in battle
since 1856. The entire number
killed during these thirty-lour years
exclusive of those who died from
disease-is about 2,2I3,OOo. In the
trimcam war 100000 were killed:
the Italian war of 1850 resulted in
the slaughter of Al, 900; in the Amer
lean civil war. 500, 900; in the Dan.
ish war (1S64), 5000; in the Austro-
Prussi;n war, 5000; in the Franco
German war-France 115,OOO, Ger
many 10000; in the Turko-Russian
war, 25O.OOO; the South African
wars, 10000; the Afghan war, D.
900; the Mexicanand Cochin-C chinese
expedition, 1000, and the bulgur-
ian-Servian insurrection, 25.O0O."-
Philadelphia Press.