Morning journal and courier. [volume] (New Haven [Conn.]) 1848-1894, 1890-06-05
EQUATORIAL.

"You press the trigger and we do the
rest," as the revolver said to tho fool who
"didn't know it was loaded. New York
Tribune.
1t will be just like George Francis Train
to keep running around the earth now until
he is taken for another equator.-Dallas
(Texas) News.
Boy-"I say, mister, don't suppose you
don't know of anybody what don't want to
have nobody to do nothing, don't you"
Gentleman addreassd-"Yes,I I n't."-Life.
"What surprises me-" said fab dealer
this afternoon, tsis that there has been 30
many nine pound shad caught this season in
the Hudson River and have not been able
to purchase one."-Kingston Freeman.
One of .-Thornpson-"You look pale
and thin, johnson. Why will you persist in
killing yourself working night and day such
weather as thiss" Johnson-"I am trying to
earn money enough TO pay the expenses of a
weeks rest in the country. New York
Weekly.
Not that Kind of Critter. -Silversmith
Ito rural old lady ordering a tea service)-
"Wouid You like to have it with repousse
decorationp Old lady-"No, I reckon not.
If the's got to be any critters on it don't
want cats I'd rather have canary birds and
butterflies. Jewellers Weekly.
Sympathetic old lady-What is the little
boy crying for?
Small 5oy-He was kicked by three big
boys who were playing ball.
sympathetic old lady Did he do anything
to the big boys to make them injure hima
Small boy-No; he was just umpirin' the
game; that's all.-Judgs.
"Say. pop" said Johnny Blimkins,
Mary Tonight. He's got ladder hid in the
barn." "You don't say so. Wait till 20
in and tell your mother, so she won't think
| it's burglars and kick up racket. An,
Johnny, you kin hang around outside and
| hold the ladder If Charley wants ye to-
Washington Post.
| Here is a sample of the homer paid to
'tbirth' in Berlin: A we'll dressed lady en-
ters shop. The clerk says: "Does the
countess want silka" "No." (She is passed
on to another clsrk.) "Does the lady want
strapper)-Pleass wait on the woman-she
wants cotton.-Berlin Letter.
| 81 wouldn't run away with any girl. I re.
member going boldly up to the old man and
asking him for his daughter. He told me te
| 90 to Hades."
"And did you go.'
| "Well," he mused hesitatingly and refee
lively, II married the girl."-Philadelphil
Times.
The Glove Cure-She was talking conf
dentially to her bosom friend. "Now tha
we are married." said che, "John has stop
ped drinking entirely. I have not detected
the odor of liquor about him since cur wed,
ding day." ''Wss it difficult for him tt
stops" inquired the bosom friend. "Oh, no
not at all. He just eats cloves. He says tina
is q certain cure. life.
An awning maker who had received pos
tai card asking him to call at house on Por
ter street put in an appearance as soon a
possible and the woman of the house pointet
out the window she wanted provided with
shade. "But you get no sun on this window,
protested the man. "Well, suppose don'ta
"But an awning is to keep the sun out" II
ita Perhaps yeu are not too old to learn some
thing" "But, ma'am, do you really want al
awning here's "Of course do. Do you Sc
that awning on the next housea' eyes, bu
the sun strikes that window" "Can't he'll
that. That woman thinks she owns the earth
She put that awning up to spite me. I an
now going to put one up to show her that sh
can't. Go ahead and haveit done as soon a
possible; and want 1t to be fiery red wit
white stripes in it."-Detroit Free Press.