St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1890-02-08
AN UNDERTAKER'S TALK.
Some Experiences of the Men Who
Bury Us.
Hard Work to Coax People to he Moderate
an ExPenditures-AL Lamentable Oc-
casion When the Remains
Wee Mixed Tn.

1" " or1 Co Coax People to he MOderat
IN ExPsnditures-A LamentabIe Oc-
casion When the Remains
Wee Mixed Up.
T.
"As rulc,'" said a well-known Fourt
avenue undertaken recently, .'there
no occasion when . man feels so ibera
In fact SO reckless regarding the ex
Penditure of money-as when he is run
ming up the expenses of a first-clas
funeral, and it requires a good deal @
TACT and strategy to keep him within
bounds and protect ourselves from loss
When the customer is wealthy and ca
stand 1T. why naturally we are incline,
70 humor every whim, and sometime
where carte blanche is given us we d.
the job up in a manner which reall,
makes it pleasure to be the star at
traction OF funeral. However, all o
our customers do not possess health,
bank account, and we have to look ou
and see that we do not get hung up
Not long since a charming widow
came into our place to make arrange
ments for the funeral of her husband
She was heavily vailed, and she sobbed
In distressing manner as she took Z
chair and proceeded to make known hcl
wants. She detailed the story OF heI
husbands illness and its fatal termina.
tion, and wound up by stating that
his funeral must be the most i'm.
posing and elaborate that could be got
ten up. Nothing we had in the estab.
bshment could be any too good. BY q
few carefully-directed questions we as
certaincd the age of the deceased. his
size, stature. and also the all-important
Tact that he had left his widow and fam.
lily in very moderate circumstances. As
soon IS our customer could compose heE-
self one of our clerks was detailed to
show her what we had, with the Quiet
admonishment that her bill should not
exceed $3.50. Various styles of caskets
were shown her, and as she had some-
what recovered her spirits she kept up
. running fire of questions and sugges-
tions. Finally, as she was about to de-
eide upon a casket which the clerk had
suggested as most appropriate, she hap
pened to cspy in another part of the
warerooms several most elaborate and
costly burial cases, which she insisted
upon looking at. In vain did the clerk
endeavOr to divert her attention from
them. Those caskets, made in mahog-
any, ebony and other costly woods.
were trimmed with silks. satins and
laces Of tho richest kind, and were orna-
mented with solid silver and gold
mountings, and were the finest goods we
kept. Compared with them the goods
which she had been looking at seemed
cheap, and she wasn't slow in detecting
the difference. The clerk shut her of
on several of them by stating that they
were sold. and that it would be impossi-
BILE to duplicate them in season for the
funeral. However, the bereaved widow
couldn't be made to swallow all this
fiction, and finally she ordered an elab-
crate affair. the price of which was just
seven hundred dollars. Having COM
pleted her selection, she gave her orders
for embalming. flowers. carriages and |
the other details. At last. when she |
had ordered every thing she could think |
OF. she started to leave, whcreupon the |
clerk politely requested her to step into |
the Office while he had the bill made up,
intending to ask her to pay . certain |
of it, or at least to give sat-
isfactory references. At the word bill"
she few into a passion. s'Bill," she
didn't care what the bill was; that would
be settled at the proper time. The poor
clerk tried to explain, but that only in
creased her anger. She called the clerk
all sorts of hard names, accused him of
a lack of feeling, and finally hounced
out of the door, and as . parting shot
said: my husband shall have the best
funeral that ever took place in the
even if have to take in
washing to pay for it,"
I'VE have many experiences similar
10 that, but in the majority of cases our
are very reasonable and we
have no difficulty in persuading them to
Letter their Judgment to ours. We much
,refer to deal with men on such oeca-
'ions, as they are less moved by senti-
nent, and are more practical and sensi-
lie. We always strongly advise that
he funeral arrangements be left to
ome male relative or friend of the fam.
ly; . bereaved woman is in NO condi-
ion to transact such business. II
AOOut mOntu ago We were called
non to officiate at the funeral of beau ,
iful young woman, the only daughter {
4 wealthy parents, who had died quite |
The grief of the stricken IA
her and mother was quiet and undem-
yet, nevertheless, Of the
eepest nature. The father was 90 pros Z
rated that he couldn't bear the thought Z
entering our warerooms to make any 4
elections; he merely sent for me to call Z
t his house and then quietly requested z
ne to make ali necessary arrangements c
or the funeral, and. handing me blank G
heck with his signature attached, bade ?
le fill it out myself.
Occasionally we receive orders for I
ersons who are alive and well, and t
hose chances Of living to ripe old :
&c are apparently as good as yours or
line. Some of these customers have il
,eir csskets sent to their homes. q