Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1890-05-23
HOW THEY PROPOSED.
SEVERAL DIFFERENT WAYS OF POP
PING THE QUESTION.

An Experience Meeting in a New York
Hotel-Love and Mercenary Matches.
The Proposal with Joke String Tied
to 1.-THE Ring with Two Meanings.
"One of the recent revolutions in felton,"
said bald headed, jolly old fellow, who
sat in the center of a group that filled the
window of a Broadway hotel the other day,
sis the way in which the heroes propose
marriage to the heroines. In this genera
ton the novelists make short work of it,
but whether they are any truer to life than
those who wrote and went to their reward
before them is an open question"
"Well, how did you do it yourself?" said
another of the group. s'Tell the truth now,
and then we'll be able to judge, perhaps,
how near the novelists come to the real
thing"
''That's just a little too personal, laughed
the old fellow, land besides, what could
you determine from one instance? But
rll tell you what l will do. will relate
the incidents of a proposal which l know
to be true, names of the parties to it not to
be asked for, if each one of you will do the
same; absolute truth the only condition"
"Agreed, agreedr' was the chorus. "You
make the START.
LOVE AND 800 A YEAR.
"Well,' said the old fellow, with twin
kle in his eye, II remember nice young
man around our parts some forty years
ago, who was of an affectionate disposition,
the kind that generally marries young, but
he had a saving appreciation of the value
of money, which it is supposed would keep
him out of foolish marriage. However,
ba foil hood hoo1c i'm q
less but beautiful girl, who had a score of
admirers all eager for her hand. He was
anxious to win her, but did not feel able to
marry ON the income he then had. Promo
ton in year or SO was pretty sure, how
ever and he thought he could hint to her
that if she would wait until his income
was 81 900 a year he would then ask her to
marry him.
"After bring ing the conversation deity
around to the proper point, Mary said he,
I have only $500 year now, would you
marry me if 1 had 81, 000?'
John said she, smiling sweetly on
him, 4 would marry you on a hundred
"What could he do? Back out and lost
her forever or bind the bargain then ane
there. He was made of good stuff, wa,
John, and they were married soon after,
much to the surprise of the villagers, who
had often listened to his condemnation OF
hasty marriages, and not without many
misgivings on his own part, but believe
he never repented."
"While we are on the subject of mercen
airy matches" said another of the company
"Tll give you my contribution before for
get it. I knew of an attractive widow
twice married, who was left almost PENN
less by her second husband and did not
know what to do for living Her last
husband had had big income and was
supposed to be rich, but in reality had al
ways lived up to the last cent of it, and
had left his widow only few thousands
She kept up appearances, however, and
met clever and rising young lawyer at a
ball one evening, who paid ardent court tt
her under the impression that she was
wealthy.
"She encouraged him and not long afte,
sent for him to draw up her will In the
will she bequeathed hundreds of thousands
of dollars in stocks and bonds among her
relatives and various charities. The young
lawyer estimated that her fortune was al
least half million. Before long he pro
posed, was accepted and married, only to
find that his wife was penniless.
THE CAUTIOUS MAN.
L LII u CcloplOuo Solu tuOUllcI vi
the group, "and Pm inclined to think that
the best way to propose is with kind of
laugh, as if it were a joke. Then if she &C
cepts you, why, all right; if she refuses
you, you can say you were only in fun.
II remember" he continued, 1.-TWO young
fellows in our town who were both court
ing the same girl. Neither of them could
say which she preferred, so nicely did she
play both her fish, not willing to lose either
till one had been fairly landed. One even
ing THAT is, Jim; you understand, we
will call him Jim. One of these fellows to
whom 1 refer, you understand. Don't
your"
Eyes, yes, of course" said every one
Jim. Go on!''
Jim found her alone, and he began at
once: Miss Jennie, do you think you could
bring yourself to leave your comfortable
home, kind father, loving mother and lit
tie brothers and sisters, and go to the city
as the wife of a young fellow who has his
fortune yet to make and has nothing to of
fer you but his honest heart and strong and
willing hand"
"Jennie cast her eyes down demurely,
and after moments reflection said: YES
James, | think l could, with the right sort
of a young man.
"'Well,' said Jim, my friend John (his
rivaD is going to New York to seek his for
tune and wants to marry. I'll mention to
him what you say
"'You horrid thingr she snapped out, 4
thought you meant YOURSELF Oh, my,
what have said? and she burst out cry
ing and made for the door. But caught
her and assured her that it was for myself
"Why, what are you all grinning att
Oh, shucks! I mean Jim caught her and
explained that it was for himself and they
lived happily ever after, as the story book
says"
"I'm afraid you let the cat out of the
bag, old fellow, but now we come to the
last man." said the jolly originator of this
experience meeting. "You're a bachelor,
though, Brown, and I don't suppose you
have any "reminiscences of that kind, have
you?''
"Why am I bachelor, them" replied
Brown. Come, now, I'll be honest with
you and tell you my own actual expert
ence, as I believe you all have been doing,
though you won't acknowledge it. had
studied how to propose gracefully, and
bought ring and composed a little speech
and had got it all down fine. Drawing the
ring from my pocket, struck telling at
titude and said:
"'Will you wear this beautiful ring for
my sake? 1t resembles my love for you.
1t has no end'
''To which she replied: Keep your ring,
sir. 1t also resembles my love for you. 1t
has no beginning
"Thus was l saved from a horrible fate
which l never again tempted"
"HughP' grunted the old chap with the
manageable daughters. "The man who
shuns matrimony for fear of its petty cares
is like one who cuts off his leg for fear of
corns. New York Tribune.