Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1890-02-06
CHAUNCEY DEPEW,
western Girls Funny Experience With
the Great Dinner-TaIker.

Chauneey Depew tells so many good
stories on other people that there is
general rejoicing when some one man
ages to have the laugh on him, and the
clubmen are telling each other with
much JUNCTION the following little tale,
says the Brooklyn Eagle: 1t is not per-
haps secret that our Chauncey is,
like Mrs. Gilpin. of frugal mind, and
is thrifty with his stories and Jokes.
After the press has once gotten hold of
his good things he never uses them
again, at least in that particular COM
munlty; but no man can have a whole
set of brand-new brilliants every day
OF his life. and little discretion and a
good memory will make ones store 90
a long way without being guilty of
repettions to the same audience. But
the discretion of even Cnauncey is at
fault at times, and the other night he
suffered because of it. The daughter
OF a certain famous American who has
hitherto made his home in the west has
been visiting in New York and was one
OF the guests at dinner of very dis
tlngulShed men and women last week.
She is woman accustomed to the in
tellectual best of the men who 90 in to
dinner with her, and on this occasion
she regarded with some surprise the
efforts OF the man who had taken her
IN to dinner to amuse her. He looked
like person of ability but she gradu-
ally gained the impression that he was
laboring under the delusion she was a
wild westerner who was many years
behind the times and had not heard
any modern jests. When this idea be-
came firmly rooted in her mind she
was at no further pains to conceal her
Indifference to his efforts, and at last
in despair her dinner companion re-
marked: Miss -, we don't seem to
get on. What is the matter? l wish
you would tell me frankly" Il will.n
she said, laughing little. 81 am
cross because you have been telling me
Chauncey Depew's old stories all the
evening. don't know him myself.
but I've heard all his stories over and
over again. and | don't think I can
stand them again" Her companion
paused moment, then shook all over
with amusement and delight, and said:
Miss -, your frankness is simply
ChCHdHtIHSS, duu IL confess IN my
turn. | thought you were very young
girl, and from so far away in the west
that you were not likely to have heard
these stories, so was using old stock
on you, but | see my error, and now l
will tell you some stories of Chauncey
Depew's that [ am sure you've not
heard" From that moment the west
ern girl declares that such a stream of
brilliant talk, anecdote, and witticism
poured forth that she never noticed
what she was eating and was desper-
ately grieved when the hostess gave
the signal to rise and she was separated
from her clever companion. Going
home in cab she said to her father:
''Do you know the name of the man
who took me in to dinner? | didn't
catch it, but l found him perfectly
charming" my dear girl" said her
father, you don't deserve your privi-
leges. Of course you found him charm
ing. That was Chauncey Depew!"
There was dreadful silence from the
young woman all the way home after
that, but she told the whole story next
morning at the breakfast table with
much shamefacedness and her family
found it too good to keep.