The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1890-08-15
QUACKS HURT ACITY.
Long-Haired Cranks who Peddle
Pills, the Pest Of a Town.
THE QUAcKs OF ALL QUAcKDoM'
Salt Lake Flooded with These Hawkers Of
Promises as frredeemable as
Witches Curses.

Of all manner of quackery that sets up
its insolent quack claims to relieve
humanity of tapeworms and sea-serpents
and certain other reptiles that inhabit the
waste places of the human animal, the
wolsS and most uabearable quack IN al
Quackdom is the patent medicine faklr
who, on the street corner. hoo-doos COM
munily with his iargon CT noises, soft
saiycs, limp ointments, soap-suds and
whole benediction sardlanapolls OF fish
worm beneiactions.
The long haired cranks with their gaunt
cadayerous visages croaking on the street
corner with cracked voices to a crowd OF
curiosity seekers every manner OF twaddle
and side show idiocy, and insane Their
mapeutics are nulsances SO glaring that 1T
is q wonder that mankind is not thrown
into commissions at the sight OF these
hawkers of human credulity.
The lightning rod tiend has been rene
gaded TO oblivion by thunderbolt clashes o.
indignation, and the sewing machine agent
sufficiently civilized to habitate with NOR
tails without giving offense by his blatant
buffoonery and spurious claims OF mlracu-
lous mechanism, but the medicine vendor
depth in the scale OF creation. conforming
no more TO the usageS of civilized society
than puddle of tadpoles. In dress, fan
tastic; in manners, clownish; in converse
ton they are sophists and Doors. They
drag their eccentricities into the street and
set them up on high and in full view, VIII ere
the weak -skulled are attracted by maudlin
wit and the afflicted preyeG upon by catch
penny credulity. With stories of mirach-
lous cures and trick songs, they tickle
their audience, then scare them into buy
ing balsams by relating horrible tales OF
extracting tape-wor and sea-serpents
from the stomachs of two day-old babies.
Their blatant buffoonery and bumptuous
gall is enough to drive away minded
men, but the sorely afflicted who have suf-
Tered for years with chronic diseases are
easily gulled by the prodigious promises
that cost nothing but the wind with which
they are made, and are as irredeemable as
confederate currency or witches course
A city, as rule, will license anything
no matter how iniquitous, provided it will
pay a license into the city treasury, even
though it be damned for doing it. These
hawkers of vile pills and putrid oils and
Aunt Jemimiah's plasters pay the munifi
cent sum of 500 to bore the city, blockade
the sidewalks and upset the stomachs Of
this community for 300 days in the year,
morning, afternoon and night
The Salvation Army, for beating q
broken down bass drum with rolling pir
to startle sinners to repentance, was ar
rested as nuisance, while these fakirs oil
concoctions that may not only devour the
soul, but destroy the body and wreck the
whole intellectual and corporeal capacity
of a man, are allowed to ply their bushes!
under the protection of the policemen:
clubs with a written license prescribed and
certified by the mayor of the city-a pseudo
recommend as to the efficacy of thell
wares
Councilman Hall merits the benefactior
of the people of this city for injecting int
the sanitary ordinance clause that will
remand these medicine mongers beyond tt'
fire limits. The section is as follows:
Sec. 5--That it shall be unlawful TO
any person or persons to sell medicines in
public manner upon the streets of Sal
Lake city within the districts known a
the fire limits.n
The only objection TO the above is tina
it IS not sweeping enough and should no
stop at the confines of the fire limits, bu
reach cut and penetrate every nook an
corner in the corporation and throw it
mantle over every home where humanit
is weakened enough to be duped.
The doctor who pratices medicine mus
have hi sdiploma, and the apothecary VIII
prepares and sells medicine must be dull
commissioned Delore ne oealS WIN I'll
chemistry that kills as well as cures
Human life hangs on such feeble threat
that longhaired cranks should have thei
Off cial sanction 10 tamper with the huma
form divine abbreviated at the base G
their cerebellums.
If the reform cannot be made complete
the license shold be made $50 day, thu
shortening the visits of quackery to fe'
days instead of harboring them for month
and years. Give US a rest,
WAX WORKS