Morning journal and courier., 1890-06-19
WISE.

If you want to get money out of a man, always appeal to his cash-ear.-Binghampton Republican.
 She-"John, you have been eating cloves" He-"No, Mary. I merely took drink" ."- The Bostonian.
 A wise man and fool understand each other better than any two wise men, Fliegende Blatter. 4#ss.-asa-a l
 "Midgely is horribly vulgar" s'whyq' "He makes remarks about other peoples breeding. "-Philadelphia Society.
 "sir," said the subscriber to the editor. | '.those supposed jokes you print are very foolish" "sIr," replied the editor, ''you should see what reject. ."-Harper's Bazaar. A Good Idea-Sergeant-s'So you are in l love with the cook at Mr. Browns, hear2" 1 "Yes, but only on weeks trial till I see l what sort of a cook she is."-Fliegende Blat- 1 ter.
 He Died Summarily. Cusic-"I hear poor Jinks is dead. He must have died very summarily." Reed-"very summarily in deed. He took off his hannels too soon."- Texas Siftings.
 Easy , on the ,e pog..old Huatsr-'.Is n. your is very peor at it," Old Hunter-"Then he is just the kind of dog you need, as you rarely ever shoot anything. ."-Texas Siftings.
 The whirligig of time reverses some things
 completely. Thirty years ago, in this coun- try, old masters sold their slaves at auction. l Now we frequently see told masters'' adver.
 tised to be sold at auction.-Norristowr
 Herald.
 Nellie-"Unole Jack, who was that lady al
 in black with the queer white hat whom WI saw go past just now4' .Unole Jack-"Tha was Sister.of Charity. dear" Nellie (afte , pause)--"Uncle Jack, was it Hope 0 P Faith."-Jester.
 A Gentle Hint.-"There seems to be number of weddings this month" he re- marked. "By the way. Miss Carrie. whe1 will be invited to yourss" "Will you nee, an invitationa" she asked, with downcas l eyes and mantling cheek.-New York Her "I called on those snobs, the Tittletons f this afternoon and they insulted me-" sai @ Mrs. Struckoyle, with marked indignation :. "They said they'd return my call next weeA
 I told lem not to trouble themselves-I didn want it back. Bazar. . Conductor (to Nose Einstein, who is stand r ing)-"Fare, please" Einstein-"But I WE a not eidding." "Thst makes no difference. "Don't ids Wy, dot notiss says, 'Shildren oe upying sesds will be charged full fare. , s "But you are not 8 child" "Yes, was. . l vos one ov der children of Israel. ."-Bo |. ! tonian.
 Clarence (courting Miss Alice, observes tn,
 her little toddier of brother has been sta
 ing at him from the parlor doorway full fl, Q minutes) )-"Why are you looking at me s r. Tommyp' Tommy-"Waitin' for you to pr' i. l pose to Alice" Alice-"Oh, Tommy, ho 10 came you to say such thinga" Tommy. "'Cause ma said if he proposed you'd HiI
 yourself right at him, and want ter s
 you."-Chatter.
 Aunt Kate-"Why Is 1t that Harry deesr l. come to see you any more, Anniea" Ann .a -"Why, you see, aunt, he asked me | 'o other night, Do you love mel Will you
 my wifeP" Aunt Kate-"Welll" Annie If "You know I always did have to be cat
 chised, and I told him, Now you just stt right where you are:' And do you kno l. auntie, the goosie didn't do anything of t h. kind, but went away without saying anoth
 word."-Boston Transcript.