The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1890-08-06
THE BILL sNoRrLETTERs.
Alex f. SWEET in National Democrat
CoTTAGEBY THE SEA June 27. 80


CoTTAGEB BY THE SEA, June %. 80,
Major Dan Nc Gary, Houston, Teras.
My DEAR MAJoR-So. people
inherit cottages, others buy cottages
or build them, but this reform Ad-
ministration has cottages thrust up
on it. Talk of Cleveland's luck
Why Cleveland is Il child of misfor-
tune to US. When i say Gus j
mean this Administration. Person
ally l never had any luck. The on.
ly streak of luck / ever had was
once when / found dime in the
pocket of a previous years vest.
Yes, here we all are at Cape May
Point, enjoying the cooling breezes
and the newspaper. comments on
the impropriety of the President ac-
cepting the cottage, and having a
nice time generally. o, yes, we get
our cottages as cheap as Sancho
Panza did his Island of Bartat,rria.
Pious John started the idea, and
the Cape May property owners were
only too glad to second the motion.
For a while there was hitch in the
negotiations, and l thought we
would spend the vacation at some
other summer resort. There were
three or four other seaside resorts
bidding for Harrison as an attrac-
ton. One of them offered a cash
bonus. So Harrison said to Wanna
maker: Business is business.
There is no sentiment about this
deal. If you can't afford to lubri-
cate me properly, know of some
body who can. / want clear deed
to the cottage, and it has got to be
fixed up in style, too."
"Wanny" consulted with the prop
erty owners, and as Cape May was
about as dead as can of pressed
beef, they rallied and did the clean
thing. By thunder, we havn't had
to pay for as much as a can of con-
densed milk. Ilubricate the fianges
of my throat with genuine import
ed English ale, as often as they need
it. You and Andy Faulkner, of the
Texas Central, ought to be here.
OF course, you understand that
the President himself Indignantly
refused to accept the cottage. He
said sternly, in my presence, to
Wanamaker: "Sir, have the deed
made out i'm Mrs. Harrison's name"
lie used the strongest language in
denouncing the transparent attempt
to bribe him.
By the way, Baby McGee got or
good thing few days ago. 1t
seems he was in the room when
Harrison and "Wanny" were MAX
ing out list of the generous donors
and what officialrewards they were
to get. After "Wanny' was gone
Baby Mckee said to Harrison:
"Grandpa, you know who gave us
this cottage?"
"No, 1 am sure / do not" replied
Harrison.
"Then why did you pinch your
eye so much when you were talking
with Uncle Wanny?"'
The little scamp had caught Har-
rison and "Wanny" winking at each
other. That's what he meant by
"pinching" his eye.
AT night sleep the sleep of the
just on rosewood bed contributed
by a man whose daughter is to be
showed in the Treasury Department
as clerk. / don't know what
the man who supplied the bed
clothes expects, but the party who
furnished the wash basin and the
rest of the crockery is going to be
put on the pension list as war
veteran with back pay.
verify believe, Dan, that the
only thing in this whole cottage
that is not tainted with fraud is nv
tooth brush. / paid for it with my
own money, honestly earned by
playing poker with a member of the
Texas delegation. At breakfast 1
sit on donated chair, and drink
coffee out of a contributed cup, and
grease my toast with butter with
which Harrison himself has been
fabricated. Funny, isn't it?
This Harrison family reminds me
of family in Texas that was an
object of compassion to the neigh
bors. When the big lazy SON came
home at night and the supper was
spread, he would look around and
say, whiningly:
"Mother dear, is this all the neigh
bors have sent us to-day?"
There is another side to this pic
ture, my dear Dan. If you will
take my advice, when you get to be
President you will buy your own