Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1890-01-16
WHEN DOCTORS DISAGREE.
Inc Difficulties a Man Has in Followin
miscellaneous Advice.

The Difficulties Man Has In Following
miscellaneous Advice.
On going into a drug store. or looking
through the advertising columns of a
newspaper. one wonders why any body,
except out of pure wilifulness. should
ever die. But when. on the other hand
one notices the different things that are
regarded as fatal by the doctors, he be-
gins to wonder that any body should be
so Illogical as to continue to live.
For example. as the winter APP
proacheS. u man begins to consider the
practical problem of underfannel But
II he lays to heart the different varie-
ties of medical advice he will find HIM
self IN the condition of the celebrated
long-eared animal between the
two bundles of hay. lie may not
starve. but he will be in serious dam
ger of freezing. / have been looking
up the matter. Germany has a famous
professOr-of flannel. DIR. Jaeger tells
all the world that it must dress in wool,
the pure, natural, uncolored article. 1t
Is good for sheep, and since the ira
dltlonal view is that the human race is
only a flock of sheep to be shepherded
and fieeced, why-the logic is plain
But famous Boston doctor tells us,
on equal authority, that cotton is Tho
only wear" l do not recall his reason.
Perhaps it is part of 4 universal system
of vegetarianism.
On the other hand, DR.. Felix Oswald,
of New York, loudly proclaims that the
only thing that ought to touch the out
side of civilized being is linen.
Meantime what is distracted man to
do as the cold weather comes on? Prof.
Blot used to say that the best cup
of coffee was the one that contained
mixture of the largest number of kinds.
How would it do to get up composite
suit of underclothing and get the benefit
of all the different varieties?
But this is only an illustration of a
larger problem. l am not yet aged. but
within my memory nearly all kinds of
food have in turn been declared dan
gerouS, if not fatal. The same is true
of all the drinks. Fleeing from the
threatening qualities of Cochituate.
am confronted with the magnified forms
Of death that Turk in the insidious bot
tie of Apollinaris. And then | am
startled by an array of statistics pre-
pared by an English medical commits
sion, wherein it is cSnclusively shown
that all water is dangerous. At any
rate, these figures are said to prove that.
in the tables of longevity, the total alb
stinence" man stands lowest.
1t begins to look as if there was "a
good deal of human nature" in doctors.
As a man reads the Bible. and sees all
texts that make for his opinions and
treats the rest as ''figurative," so may
1t not be with others besides theolOgi-
ans? There is such a seductive tenden-
cy in men to make their foot-rule tho
measure of the universe.
1t seems to me Just possible that there
is a grain of truth in the old proverb:
What is one mans meat is another
mans poison" Those who, logically,
ought to die, as matter of fact keep
right on living, and those who ought to
live do die. Perhaps little individu-
ality should come in here. as in some
other things II a man has not sense
enough to find out what kind of food
and drink and clothing agrees with him,
and to govern himself accordingly. then
perhaps it is just as well for the world
for him not to stay here. Let him go
on, and save the fool-killer trouble. But
if he has any sense. then experience
will become his teacher. The only
''safe" person in this world is the one
who has learned his own personal lesson
as to how to live.-M. j. Savage in BoS-
ton Globe.