The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-09-14
BRIGHT BITS
TO-DAY AND Tomorrow. -

TO-DAY AND TOMORROW
TnInk twice before you speak" is wise,
And oft it will save sorrow;
In thinking twice think once today
And the other time tomorrow.
philadelphia Times
IF IT is DISCOVERED that Mars is populated.
OF course the people are all soldiers. = Washing
ton Star.
JACK STEIGHLArE y would go to the very cen
ter OF the earth to please you.
Miss BORED You needn't go so far as that
just go hone.-Epoch
HE-Aw.aw, I'm rawther surprised to hear you
say you sad in the balcony of the London
theaters- The stalls are the proper place, Y
know.
SHE-Yes, for calves. The Jester
SIZE (pining for pleasant words)-Oh, George.
| cannot understand it. Why do you lavish
this wealth of love on me when there are so
many girls more beautiful and worthy than 1?
Helm bowed If l Bnow.-Spdre Moments
HoJAcK-Helo, Doctor, I thought you intend
ed to leave town this morning for few weeks
rest?
Dr. Lobelia-I did intend to- but several of
my patients attended watermelon party last
night Chicago Inter OceGn.
IT'S STRANGE" observed Jinglepop, how
politics creep into the names of favorite edibles
Now there's Washington pie and cabinet pua-
ding and
And cottage pudding" limited mis- wife,
who reads the ewspapers.-Americdn Gro
Ger.
PRINCIPAL of Girls Boarding School Ito her
butcher From tomorrow you can send me
three pounds of meat less than the usual
quantity.
Have you lost some of your boarderssr
mo, but four of the girls have fallen In
ove."-BGsIer Adchrichten.
ITS PRETTY DAMP for a person with the
rheumatism to be prowling around, Uncle
Josh "
''Mebbe, boss, but it's der doctors advice"
"Do you mean to tell me the doctor advised
you to be out nights?"
Not 'zactly dat away-but he said I must
have chicken brof. Life.
AScHoLAR-Jones prides himself upon his
| learning"
80 believe"
''Self -educatedY''
wholly so''
Does he know Latino"
know Latin! ! should say so. Why, man.
| when he writes to the papers he signs himself
| Pro Bono Publico. boston Courier.
no" said she, IL can only be a sister n
you"
Very web, =" said he 81 must be going. 7
had expected a different answer, but-well, good
night"
| George" she faltered, as he started out into
| the night, GEORGE"
What is it?" he asked Grossly.
"Arent you going to kiss your sister good
| nightg"
He did not go.-Ldcrence american.
| 1AeON-"O On you give he dnOJQeF KISS before
( l go?
Janet-Well, just one.
Jason-Thanks. That was sweet. But don't
you know, Janet, that am getting tired of this
small retail business, only one at timer 1t is
upcon stitutional.
Janet-Ah, indeed, Jason.
| Jason-Certainly. | prefer them in the
| original package.
| H got the original package and two souls
were made happy. -Pittsburg Dispatch
He was a stamp fiend, young and precocious
| The plain American stamp had no interest for
| him. he was making collection of foreign
| ones, and 50 when they sent him down to the
| postohice for package he did not pay much
| attention, but brought it home and handed it
over. and skipped out TO play tag. Next day
they showed MIN new sister who had arrived
| He looked at her with some curiosity
Say, where did she come froms''
| ION, from heaven"
From heaven! know that was the pack
| age brought from the postoffice Yesterday
and never knew anything about it.
yes"
"Goly why didn't you save me the stanpss"
-SGn francisco Chronicle.