The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1890-01-07
BUMPS AND JINKS.
Thy Discourse Again on the Political
Situation.

Situation.
| A few evenings later our reporter found
| his old friends again engaged in discus
| sing politics. Jinks was asking about
points the different parties were divided.
Turning to Bumps he said, GLOW is it
that one party is having open meetings
in the wards, an is calling all hands to
come to them, an the other is so secret ?
| thought shat folks that is working for
the god uv the people alwu5 la / meet
ings in publick ?"
"Well, JiIks," said Bumps, "I'll tell
you how it is. The people that believes
in decent government calls themselves
the Reform party. They are the folks
who Strengthened out things here two
years ago, an has been navigatin' the
| ship ever since. This crew is made up
Nv people from different countries from
| Ameriky, England, Germany and other
| places, besides good many of the ma
| tives. Wv course they don't all think
alike an some doesn't prove Nv all thets
| been done, but they wants to see things
| done fair an above board. They's the
| folks thets been havin' their meetin's in
| publick, and shows their colors. The
other folks isn't party 'zactly, though
| they calls themselves the opposition, but
| is all kinds Nv people who wants differ
| ent things. Mos Nv 'em wants to have
things as they was before; but they don't
like ter say SO. They haven't got no
| cOlOrS Nv their own, only what they's
| borrowed.
''But, say, Bumps" said Jinks, 81
heerd one teller telling about a Me-
| chanics Onion that was agin the Chinese,
bat was in favor of good COVER ment.
An about a 'Hewey Karolaina' Tor
something Nv tibet sort) that was agin
| good COVER ent, but favored Chinese !;
| what's become Nv them?"
81 wuz jest goin' ter tell yer bout
that, Jinks," said Bumps. "It's a
'markabie thing these folks tibet calls
! themselves the opposition is made up
Nv what's left Nv them mechanics and
karolainos. The heft Nv Their real me-
chanics left the onion-either mutinied
outright or deserted-'cause they couldn't
stummick what the others wuz up ter,
an the karolainas was weak an hadn't
no organization, an neither they nor
what was left Nv Their onion knew how
to make up ticket, an some fellers
who had axes to grind an who didn't
care fer ther principles Nv either party
brot' 'em together.
AN then they got into peck O trou-
BILE, ther trouble wuz ter git pussons to
60 on their ticket who wud represent
their principles. You see Their CONSOLE
dated concern he'd no principles. What
the onion he'd started in fer an what
Their Hewey wanted wouldn't mix emmy
more then lie and water. Wv course
they couldn't hev public meetings under
them circumstances, they had ter cover
things up an see what could Oe DONE"
"But, l say Bumps" said links, sits
seems they has made up tickle, They've
got Weederman, Maciarlane, Walker,
Crab, Cummlns, Phillips, Pua, Muller
an Mccarthy for Mobiles; an Bush,
Cummins, Marquee, Lucas an Wilcox
for Representatives"
eyes," Jlnks, 'thet's the gang that's
trying ter git in, theys mostly nomm-
ated themselves SO ter speak an thinks
they is great an good men. But it's
very funny bizinis.''
''Why there's Widemann, he's held
offices all the way from deestrick road
supervisor to ledge NV the 'Spreme
Court an Cabinet Minister, but he's a
turribel onsartin party. He's like some
Nv them fireworks what shoots one way
then another, an fiz an squirt, an ger
can't tell were they's 'goin' ter light.
Or like some guns thets jess as likely ter
shoot the teller that's got hold Nv it as
the teller its aimed at"
can there's Walker, we'll, what shall
l compare him ter. Some folks says he's
something like one Nv them jelly fish
squeeze i'm an he'll take mos any
kinder shape, ter suit.
can Macfarlane-The concern he's
connected with was so mixed up with
Guv'ment bond rackets an dooties on
ticker, an things, tibet it's hard ter be-
lieve he's bein' consumed with the fires
Nv patriotism.
can there's McCarthy-why he's thel
Teller that blazed up glorious Oh thel
Chinese question tibet time when Wilder
an Schmidt was runnin', tibet tole vel
about las year. Red hot agin Chiner
=--..-. nm out with proclamation
i'm me the a" paper, an, w,,y. fN ~" s
wouldn't prosecute Wilcox ter be hung, /,
but changed it ter 'spiracv, he jess billed |
right over with holy 'dignation, an re-
signed from the army, an all that, an
now they've put him on the ticket with
fellers in favor Nv Chinese, an with that
same Wilcox!
AN | might 60 on an tell yer bout
Their rest Nv 'em. But it's 'nough ter
turn yer stummick. Yer see they tried
an tried ter git men that the communi-
ty would support ter 60 on Their ticket,
an finally used fine comb, 30 ter
speak, an got what they could.
But mus go, Jinks. Ez tole yer
before there's no two things as democrat
ICES men more'n Ticker an politics.
Good night, ole man, I'll see yer agin,
an tell yer more, maybe"
Arm Embellishments