, 1890-12-28
HYMEN VERSUS CUPID.
"How SHALL a WOMAN KEEP HER
HUSBANDS Lover


Copyright by American Press Association
1t is always rather Notifying to a
woman to read articles telling how to
retain her husbands affections, when
few writers, if any, ever go TO the trouble
to correspondingly inform n husband
"How to Retain Your Wife's Affections"
1t seems to be taken for granted that it
is an easy matter for husbands to keep
their wives in love with them. This is
not as it should be. Every woman should
manage in some way to make her hus-
band feel hat her love. and not her mere
faithfulness, is the sine qua non of hap
piness for him, and that 1t cannot be con-
tinued to him unless his life and his love
for her are such rs TO deserve the rich
return which she desires to give him.
A woman of tact and rescurc who
genuinely loves her husband will take
this attitude unconsciously. both toward
herself n toward him, and the mutual
relations of the two, if he be a true man,
will be permanently adjusted on this ba-
sis; but there are thousands of wives,
well meaning and nffectionate
who, since things are rs they are, see
their husbands slipping away from them
day by day, and who would give any
thing for the power to bring them back
n hold them to the romantic fealty of
their counting days.
Sue women as these nave not de-
served, like the willfully giddy and per-
verse, to lose their treasure; they have
only been dull and stupid. Perhaps while
they nave remembered the paramount
instruction to keep their husbands well
fed they nave been too ''tamely and
truly true" or perhaps, while their
households have been neat and well or
dered. the strain of life has been too
hard upon their tempers, and their quick
words, regretted as o as spoken, have
created a breach. How can they regain
what they have lost? And how can they
keep it when gained?
Perhaps the strongest story which
SAKE Holm ever wrote is that in which
she tells "HOw One Woman Kept Her
Husband" There is some general truth
in that striking tale, but the main cir
cumstances were too exceptional to af-
ford much help to women at large.
There are, however, many truths regard
ing the keeping of husbands, which
everybody knows in a vague way, but
which few apply to themselves. There
are many men whom nothing could per-
suade to their duty. to say nothing of
love, either because they have not the
materials within them for honesty or
nobility, or because they are not men Of
principle nor of judgment.
But there are plenty of well meaning
men, brought mp upon traditions, who
do not feel the old glow OF affection for
their wives, and are not gentlemen
enough to simulate it. They find other
places more attractive than home, and
without being either immoral or brutal
they make their wives miserable by show
ing plainly that the old love has gone out
in their hearts.
There is one fact which such wives
ought to take to heart. 1t is this: In
spite of all the lovely and beloved in
valids. of whom there are not a few. it
remains true that health and happiness
usually go together. The healthy wife
is oftenest the happy wife.
But" many a poor, broken woman
has argued in defense of herself, "'what
if you had to be sick2 What if hard
wofk and anxiety and all sorts of wear
ing little burdens had affected you so
that you could not help being sick?"
This is largely nonsense. No woman,
unless under a crushing weight of power
ty, or the desp~erateillness of a loved one,
has my right to work too hard for her
health. 1t is n distinct robbery of her
household when she does this. She knows
that there is nothing gained by sitting
up night after night till the small hours
to get the family mending done to suit
her, or to put ten tucks in Cora Bellies
petticoats. 1t is far better to occasion
ally let n child wear an undarned stock.
ing and to let Cora Bellies skirts hang
plain forevermore than to injure ones
health. Ten to one the mother works
thus from the insane desire with which
some women seem imbued to pose as
| martyrs. Husbands do not, as a rule,
\ love whining, complaining, weakly wo-
men. Many "a wife recognizes this truth
after the mischief is done. Then she
would "give n thousand worlds to cure
what a trife would have prevented.
Perhaps the quality which tends the
! most to secure health. and which endears
/, one the most to ones friends, is the now
| unfashionable virtue of c~heerfulness.
| Addison SAYS: "Cheerfulness is the best
\ promoter of health. Repinings and Sc
\ cret mrrmurs of heart give impercepti-
BILE strokes to those delicate fabrics of
which the vital parts are composed and
wear out the machinery insensibly."
"There is no greater crime" says
Thackeray, ''than for a oma who is
ill used and unhappy to show that she is
so. The world is quite relentless about
bidding her keep a cheerful face" and
in spite of the bitter twang to this remark
it must be accepted, if for nothing else
than because it is a promoter of health;
and because it will pay, cheerfulness
should be cultivated. Sickness in the
housemother disarranges all of the
home routine: it "debases the mind" as
one writer remarks, it makes people
selfish and notional, it is not only a phys
ical but a moral and mental plague, eat
ing away all the beauty of life. A WON.
an, even if she cannot brace her soul u1
to the high pitch of taking care of her
self because it is right, should regulate
her diet, her exercise and her SLEEP
Alright, because thus she will conduce to
the happiness of her household and be
come more charming to her husband.
In fact, 1t will make her more charming
TO everybody.
Especially should she take care of her
clothing.
Dress as Won did during the DAYS OF