Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1890-11-08
THE HONEST GRANGER's VIEWS.


Nor keep the crops from yieldin' well on
Uncle Sans big farm.
Some Nv 'em say that tariff law-'Squlre Bill
McKinley's BILL
Has riz the price of brandy as well as fine
cigars;
Ar SO, you see, them city chaps who fizzy
Went square agin' the very men who have
put up the bars.
Coll durn 'em. we kin raise wine grapes an
make the f1zzy stuff,
An grow terbacker fur cigars as well as
granny's snuff.
Some Nv 'em say that Tom Reed driv good
cattle from the clover.
An then run in young stockers by crack nv
party whip;
Perhaps he wouldn't be 50 fast if he had to do
it over,
An we uns can't b., badly blamed fur givin'
him the tip.
When men who run fur Congress git the votes
to send 'em there
They have a right to legislate, an should be
treated fair.
"some Nv 'em say Ben Harrison has treated
Jim Blaine bad,
An lowed few alick fellers to run the ship
Of State;
An, 1 swow, it looks to me, arter all, as if he
had,
AS he 'pear'd to st.ut both eyes to what they'd
legislate.
Ben seems to have kin bankin' on the name his
gran'dad bore.
An hid his reputation in the hat the old
chap wore.
wall, now. I'll givs you my own views on the
unsettlin votes
Which hev turned the nations sod and
planted new crop.
While I'm not a politician, I've ben quietly
takin' notes.
An think understand why they've made
such flop.
I'll not attempt to thrash the load an separate
the grain.
AM use highfalutin' argument instead of
language plain:
Them fellers down to Washington kept sittln
nigh year,
An acted more like loafers than real hard
workin' men;
Some of their speechifyIn' the wimmen blushed
to hear,
An fellers on the papers Just made Is
with the pen;
Fur the words they used debatin' would not be
An drinkin' men IRE seldom seen in more dis
graceful rows.
There wur millions In the treas'ry Uncle Sam
my runs,
An this they MIXED effectu'lly until 1t just
went dry;
An then they tried to pass law which meant
that loaded guns
Would play part in politics, to scare US by
an'-by.
An there they cussed and tangled until the peo-
pie tired:
Now this is why so many hev quietly ben
fired.
"They acted just as if us folks had nutbin'
more to say,
politics:
But reckon in the future they'll work instead
of play,
An not trifle with the people, or cut up any
tricks
1 think this is the reason why US people revo.
luted:
An we'll just keep on doin' it until we all are
suited"
SARAH BERNHARDT's son has indicated
his mas honor on the field of honor. Of course
he lives to tell US all about it.
THE man who bet the money he had saved
up for an overcoat and landed on the wrong
side now hunts the sunny side of the street.
A LIAR would require omniscence to guard
all points and prevent discovery.
CoNGREssMEN should realize by this time
that the people do not judge of their work by
the revised record presented through their
official organ,
STANLEY holds the log book of the rear
guard, and is loaded for his jealous traducers
He will undoubtedly come out Of the African
jungle with flying colors.
IF HE'LL was robbed of all its horrors the
world would be full Of sinners.
THE Democratic organs are shouting "Stealr,
already. They want the earth now.
ANOTHER Philadelphia Campaign liar has
humbly apologized. The surprises of the past
campaign are growing as fast as the Demo-
cratic majority in Congress.
REED seems to have ruled himself out
IF Barttelot struck woman the Arab who
shot him is the hero.
THERE are more Wildcats than coons in this
section this year, thanks to the oil men and the
Independent.
THE only mud singers in the country now
are the rival baseball cranks.
CLARKsoN doubtless believes by this time
that the people can work The guillotine as well
as he can.
IRELAND has lots of sympathy but she wants
bread.
THE would-be Speakers Of the next House