davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Irish standard., 1890-08-02
HUl ORC US DRIF Z 1 GOD | J.

II
NY son, define ambition. =
..Well, it's always feeling that You
want to d, something that you know
you can I. =
"A Kansas editor has been granted q
pension Of $72 . month for indigestion.
He has. probably been using too much
plate matter in his inside.
Clerk How did that moth mixture
20 that sold you the other day, sir?"
Customer Like hot cakes. The
moths won't eat anything else.'
Reporter Well, Mr.. Cleveland, do
Mr. Dana's remarks annoy you very
much?' Mr.. Cleveland well, ! am
not losing any Assh over them. y
Sunday School Teacher 81 Now John
ME, tell me what took all the snap out
of Sampson?'
Johnnie-''A horne made hair cut,
ma'am."
Judge -''Have you ever seen the prs
oner at the bar!''
Witness -''Never, your honor; but
I've seen him when I strongly suspected
he'd been ct il"
II hear that you were robbed last
night, Gilroy." eyes, Larkin; but the
highwayman seemed to. think i needed
some assistance" 'sHow was that?"
Gle held me up.''
Chicago Teacher-s.Ye corned beet
is one OF our most famous exports. Now,
who can tell me what stands next to
corned beef?'
Boston Little Boy (triumphantly) -
Cabbage"
/. "And did you grow up with the coun-
try?" was asked Of young man who
had taken Greeley's advice and lived to
repent.
.'No," was the reply; ''but I came
near getting planted"
An electrician has invented wonder
full watch that will tell man when his
note Is coming due. His watch would
be great deal more remarkable. as we'll
as useful. if it would tell the man where
to get the money to pay the note.
He-ssWould you care much if
should steal kiss?''
She (strictly puritan1c)-sI should.
L could not bear to look at you again
should T know you to be guilty Of
violating in the smallest degree one Of
the commandm snts. II you mntt have
a kiss occasionally ask for it and l will
be only too willing to donate it; but you
:, must not steal it.
While Thad. Stevens was practising
law at. Lancaster, Pa. a boy sided up to
his desk. "Take off your hat" Mr..
stevens said ST amt got my hat on, =
eplied the boy. ''What do you mean
" contradicting ms?" demanded Mr..
stevens IT amt got my hat on, :,
persisted the boy: tits my brother Joe's
hat" ''Oh'' Mr.. Stevens said, as he
repressed smile. SWELL, the next
time you have an errand here bring Joe
/, with you, so that he can take off his hat. .
The Irish standard., 1890-08-02

Duluth.
Special Correspondence OF the Irish Standard.
Miss Belle Henry is visiting in st.
Paul.
Bert Webber returned from business
"trip to Chicago.
F. P. Green, Of Saltwater, has come
to Duluth to make it his future home.
Geo. L.. Hendrickson, Of the st. Paul
Daily Record, was here during regatta
week.
Misses Mamie and sadie Farrell, of
St. Paul are visiting with their uncle,
Capt. James Farrell.
It is reported that the Hotel st. Louis
has been sold to the Boston Investment
company for $4,000
MIR. Perkins, of Chicago, is in the city.
He is brother of Mr.. Perkins, of the
fake Superior Catholic.
G. P. Leidner and III. w. Clark were
drowned by the capsizing and sinking
OF their sail boat in the yacht race.
John Kenna has resigned his position
as deputy sheriff of st. Louis county
and accepted the Office Of chief of police
of Lake Side, a suburb of Duluth.
Tracy Bangs, jr., formerly Of lie
Sueur, but now prominent attorney
of Grand Forks, spent a few days in the
city on his return from the K. P. en-
campment at Milwaukee.
James Kilduf, ST., and his son Mi
chael. both Of Belle Plaine, MIMI. were
(: in the city during regatta week. They
were the guests Of Mrs. Patrick o. Don
nell. daughter Of Mr.. Kilduf.
Rt. kev. Bishop MEG olrick has been
in Belle Plaine and neighboripg ms
\ sions. of which his old friend, Rev.
Father Kennedy. is pastor, and admin
istered the Sacrament of Jonfrmation
sto large numbers.
Alice May, II iinona Mrs,
Nellis, In sO' /, fisses Grace and
The Irish standard., 1890-08-02
Exchange Of Uourtesies.

A spicy exchange of compliments has
passed between Loren Fletcher, the
we'll known politicians, and joe sW hee-
lock, the editor of the Pioneer Press.
Says Loren to Joe: t'Y our first venture,
as recol]ect it, was when you went to
the Chippewa country and ATTEMPTED to
do business there. but you became so
pusillanimous and indecent that even
the squaws repudiated you and drove
you cut"
Says Joe to Loren: "Fie! Fletcher.
foul fxer of found-out and frustrated
frauds, Tuning and fretting. with frenzy
ferocious. through forty.fiye folios of
feculent fustlan; of fbs and fapdo0dle;
Of datulent fribbery; of filthy and fool
ish fanfarronade-fi3! Fletcher, fixed
fixer of fixes that wouldn't stay fixed,
go fry in the fat of your fury frenettc
aud founder forever IN your hill of a
fix" W. ~
This Is certainly fine piece of ALI
iteration, and Loren will find it difficult
to retaliate in words commencing with
..w."
The Irish standard., 1890-08-02
Why She Gould Not Comply.

( 7" LIZ tAu0 NOuAa lNVb VOAuP}ys
There is spicy story Of peevish old
farmer who had married young wife,
and, being lately on his death-bed, with
his dearest beloved in attendance YVES
giving her directions how to go on with
the management Of his estate after his
deoease; when, after some questions,
she asked him: LAS you have been so
kind as to leave the whole stock on this
farm to me, it is not to be supposed that
I shall be long without a number of
suitors; pray, my dear, have you any
desire that should marry any particular
person in preference to another. for it is
my intention to act sgreeablY to your
wishes?" To this he very waspishly
rep lied "Marry--why, you may marry
the devil if you like!" 20, my love-"
she replied IN very tender voice, ''that
cant be done, for, if you recollect, my
dear, it is not lawful to marry two
brothers. .
IRISH AMERICAN: Jeremiah O'Don-
oYan (Rossa) has accepted an agency
from Messrs. Thurbsr, Whyland 81 Co.,
Of New York, TO dispose OF groceries
for that firm, at wholesale. He thus
returns TO his original busin sss pursuits,
and we wish him unb oundsd suctess /.
therein. In pursuing that line he can
make himself 4 much q ore prosperous
and useful member Of society than he b
could ever become while engaRed sin the.
farcial ynamite'' crusade To which he
has devoted his recent years, hrs;
own persona 1isad yantag and the
The Irish standard., 1890-08-02
A

II $50.
a case Of sunstroke was reported o.
"Wednesday.
5s You can get any repairs for your
stoves at 1855 l8S w Seventh ST., ST. Paul.
Loren Fletcher's letter to Editor
Wheelock, Of the Pioneer Press, is racY
reading. Wheelock retaliates with more
hapdoodle.
Z. 81. Kelly has left for Europe to
join his daughter. They will visit the
principal cities and return home in
September.
Thos. Lowry took out two building
permits Wednesday morning. one fol
the Arcade and Masonic Hall building,
to cost $250,OOO. The other was for
the electric motor power house on Hill
street to cost $15, 900.
The 12-year-old boy named Albert
Boetsch, who was run over by Great
Northern train Saturday evening, died
at st. Joseph's hospital late Monday
night. It had been necessary to ampu-
tate both hands previous to his death.
His parents live at 597 Thomas street.
Lovers of macaroni will soon be fur
nished with that article made from our
own Minnesota wheat. A company COM
posed of Boston and New York capital
lists, with 800, 600 at their command,
will commence operation as soon as the
necessary buildings can be erected. The
factory will be located at St. Paul park.
Assistant Dairy Commissioner Law
renee has received long letter from a
firm OF butter importers IN Germany, in
which the writer's mention that the
butter sent from America in tubs gets 3
bad taste from the wood, and recommend
ing that it be packed in oak wood tierces.
1t also desired that the butter be uncol-
lored, as at present it Is too yellow.
They prefer butter slightly colored in
summer, and in winter very pale.
On Sunday evening last representa-
lives from the Total Abstinence societies
of Minneapolis, saltwater, Hastings
and St. Paul met at Cretin hall. j. R.
LalIy, vice president of the union. was
made chairman. It was decided to hold
the union picnic at Minnetonka park, on
Thursday, Aug. 21st. A programme of
sports will be arraigned by the COM
nittee appointed for that purpose.
Tickets of admission to the grounds will
be placed within the reach of all-25
cents being the price ofadmission. This
will be a basket picnic, and any one who
goes hungry on that day will have but
one person to blame. The meeting adj
jonrned subject to the call of Chairman
Lally.
A cold blooded murder was committed
at North St. Paul on Sunday afternoon
last. Two laborers had been drinking
heavily during the day and quarrel
ensued, in the course OF which one OF
She men grabbed an old rusty pick and
plunged it through the brain Of his adj
versary. The victim was instantly
killed. The murderer walked to the
Margaret street police station in this
city and gave himself up, relating the
story Of the murder. The offence was
committed Just beyond the Washington
county line, and the officials at Saltwater
were notified. Officers Of t1isss latter
place took charge Of the remains of the
murdered man, and the prisoner will be
prosecuted.
The Irish standard., 1890-08-02

|.QuOeQ Dy s0tnpr s6EOuDle6. she 1A0 b8k0nf
breakfast with the fanlil y as usual, com
planning, however. Of not feeling we'll
Shortly afterwards she was taken very
i'll and in.half an hour had passed away
She was born in Cork county, ireland,
il 1884, but when an infant was brought
by her parents to America. She resided
at Auburn, n. Y. until sixteen years OF
age, when she went to Port Byron, sub
sequently living at Aurora and Savanna,
N. Y, being married at the former place
in 1854. Some four years ago she came
with her husband to Winona, and during
their residence here they have been held
in high esteem with all with whom they
have become acquainted. Mrs. Flynn's
death will be heavy blow to her hus-
bard and children, eight of whom SUR
vive, four sons and four daughters.
Another son, Mr.. Ed. Flynn, was killed
by the cars little over two years ago.
All the children reside in Winona, with
the exception Of Mr.. John Flynn, whose
home Is in Minneapolis. The funeral
took place on Monday morning at $50
o'clock, Rev. P. J. Gallagher officiating.
There was large attendance at the
services and about ninety carriages fol-
lowed the remains to their final resting
place in ST. Mary's cemetery The pail
bearers were M. Mccarthy, T. .Fitz-
patrick, ]. Dunnigan, j. Brophy, p.
Flannery and j. Regan.
Oakland.
Special correspondence to the Irish Standard.
Ambrose Murphy has returned from q
visit to his parents IN New York.
Miss Anna Cummings, who has been
attending school at Milwaukee, has
returned to her home in Oakland to
spend her vacation.
Austin's Catholic Total Abstinence
society is making rapid progress in the
cause. There are now thirty members
in good standing in the society.
The new school building at Austin is
being rapidly built AMI when completed
-, :. If which all the resi-
~-oud.
The Irish standard., 1890-08-02

The Sister.
II No household is complete without a
sister. She gives the finish to the
family. A SISTERS love, a SISTERS i'll
fluence-What can be more hallowed!
A sisters watchfnl care-can ANYTHING
be more tender? a sisters kindness
does the world show us anything purer?
Who would live without q sister? A
sister is sort Of guardian angel In the
home circle. Her presence condemns
vice; she is the q uickener Of good reso-
lutions, the sunshine in the pathway OF
home. TO every brother she is light
and life. Her heart is the treasure.
house of confidence. La her he fnds a
safe adviser. a charitable, f0rgiving,
tender, though often severe, friend.
In her he finds a ready companion.
Her sympathy is as open as day aud:
sweet as the fragrancs of flowers. We
pity the brother who has no sister. no
sisters love. We feel sorry for the
home which is not enlivened by a.
sisters presence. A sisters Office is a
noble and gentle one. It is hers to
persuade to virtue, to win to wisde ms
ways; gently to lead where duty calls;
to guard. the citadel Of home with the
sleepless vigilance OF virtue; 70 gather.
graces and strew flowers around the.
,ome altar. To be sister is to hold 81
.Weet place il the heart Of hons; it Isl
ominister Ia q holy office. 55.s
The Irish standard., 1890-08-02

holding possession Of Boston, and watch
ing their opportunity to communicate
information to the enemy, he directed
certain precautions to be taken in the
selection Of sentinels, not against for
eigners as such, but against traitors and
spies in disguise.
&c DIR. Burrell has time or inclination
to read authentic history I would re-
commend him 10 read the writings of
WASHINGTON as given BY his eminent
biographers, Irving, Sparks and
Headley, and he will find that Washing
ton uttered sentiments Of sympathy for
the distressed Of foreign lands, and gave
9 cordial welcome to those from abroad
who reached the hospitable shores Of
America &, 28 3s
No rhetorical clap trap on the part Of
DR.. Burren will G onvince the student 81
American history that Washington was
either q Know Nothing Or bigot. and
injustice to his memory resent the i'm
.putat ion cast upon his noble character ].
4 have already offered 800 for any Pro
testant institution IL Minneap olls ii Dr..
Strong can trace the Lafayette motto to
any original SOURCE and 4 now make d.
similar offer or the benefit Of any Pres
byterian institp ton i Df. Burrell canj
The Dalles times-mountaineer. [volume] (The Dalles, Or.) 1882-1904, 1890-06-14

con6rmations strong as proofs OF holy
Writ" Any plank in platform IS
believed in full, aud no questions are
asked. This is not the case with Re-
publicans. Every proposition made
by the party receives the most careful
scrutiny. and if not suitable is not
upheld. By reason of this discrimina-
ton Republicans are liable to be led
astray by any idea having the sem
blance of morality, or the better
ment of the human race. They are
progressive, and cannot be bound to
to any old idea which received the
sanction of their fathers twenty years
ago, and some of the descendants of
old-line Republicans have forgotten
the issues of quarter of century
ago. They have joined with Demo
Gratis in the greenback, prohibition and
other movements, whose only ten
dency is to defeat the Republican
party, and give victory to the oppos-
ing organization. If we had the same
shackles upon adherents that Democ-
racy has, Hon. D. P. Thompson would
have been elected governor, and the
victory of June I'd would have been
veritable Waterloo.
The Dalles times-mountaineer. [volume] (The Dalles, Or.) 1882-1904, 1890-06-14

We shall soon have the official fig
ures of our population, and after that
there will be no opportunity for real
estate boomers to distort facts. The
census enumerators are doing their
work carefully, and are taking the
name, age, occupation, etc., o. every
inhahitant, whether he or she he Mon
golian, Indian or African. Aside
from the number of people IN the
United States in 1890, the census will
furnish valuable information regard
ing nationality and physical condition
of residents. We are satisfied Oregon
will lie entitled to two representatives
in the lower house from the increase
of population, and the people of East
ern Oregon will be gratiied to be
accorded the privilege of a representa-
tive of their interests in the halls OF
congress. This will be one good effect
of the census of 1890, for which we
should be thankful.
The Dalles times-mountaineer. [volume] (The Dalles, Or.) 1882-1904, 1890-06-14

Municipal elections are different
from state or national. There is no
politics whatever in the former, and
every property owner should consider
the best interests of the city before he
casts his ballot. Men interested in
certain schemes for their own benefit
may present projects for their own
aggrandisement; but before these are
endorsed they should be carefully
analyzed and the fact should be ascer-
tanned whether they are for public
or private veal. Those who live in
The Dalles and own property here
have higher motives than "cold-
blooded business" propositions to
consider. The health of their
families and protection against fire are
of greater urgency than the mere "cold-
blooded business phase of the ques-
tion. We need water to drink-a pure
element; we need it to quench the
flames of incendiarism, ard there has
been already too much dilly-dallying
in the matter. Citizens protect your
homes and vote for the best interests
of The Dalles.
The Dalles times-mountaineer. [volume] (The Dalles, Or.) 1882-1904, 1890-06-14
The city election. which takes !,

The city election, which takes place
next Monday, is very important one
for The Dalles. Several members oi
the council will be elected, and prop.
erty-owners and citizens should be
careful in the selection. There is the
most urgent necessity that new sys-
tenn of water-w works should be inaug-
urated, not as a "cold blooded business
proposition" but as a matter of life
and health to our families and pro-
lection to our property. Nearly one
half of the city is without an adequate
water supply. and no more time should
be wasted on the matter. The funds
are available, and steps should he
taken Immediately to begin work. 1t
has been suggested that the council
advertise for bids forthwith for the
Of water works, and the
cheapest and quickest plan be adopted.
We believe this is the most advisable
method, and we hope that some such
plan be adopted.
The Dalles times-mountaineer. [volume] (The Dalles, Or.) 1882-1904, 1890-06-14
The Louisiana lottery IS r

The Louisiana lottery IS receiving
adverse criticism from nearly every
newspaper in the country, and it un.
doubtedly merits censure. That any
such system of gaining money is per.
nicious in its effects cannot be doubted
When wealth is accumulated by any
game of chance it divorces the moral
sentiment of community from the
basis principles of honesty, and will
eventually undermine the integrity OF
the people. The true theory, and the
only one upon which any community
can rest. is that an equivalent should
be gwen for all money. But we do
not believe, aside from the lottery or
"chance" principle involved in the
Louisiana scheme, that there is any
game of robbery carried on. We always
have discountenanced any such scheme,
and always shall, on general prinoi-
Piles, believing that the object of every
one having the welfare of the people
at heart should be, that every
dollar earned should be an honest
one and represent labor of some
kind.
The Dalles times-mountaineer. [volume] (The Dalles, Or.) 1882-1904, 1890-06-14

We read the editorials of many in
terror papers, and they claim a Demo
cratic victory as the result OF the re-
cent election. Th,s--putting it mild
ly-is a mistake. The Republicans
have gained one state otticial-state
treasurer the election of the rest
of the state ticket by an increased ma
jority. Oregon is more Republican
to-day than it was in 1883, as facts
and figures will demonstrate. 1t is
true that Hon. D. P. Thompson was
defeated for governor; but if Rerub-
llcans in Multpomah county had sup
ported the state ticket he would have
been elected. Further, if there were
no Union party, and the issue had
simply been on the national issues be-
tween the two parties, the majority
for the ticket would have been tie
same as that given to hon. BInSer
Hermann, 5000. Mr.. Hermann
is the representative of national
Republicanism in Oregon, and his
vote is safe criterion by
which to judge the strength of the
party. In 1888 he received 7400 ma
Jority; two years previous he received
less. This is indisputable evidence
that the Republican party is growing
in numbers every year, ard in 1892 it
will poll a much larger vote. There
is no reason for Democracy to be JOY
full, except Gov. Pennoyer represents
it wholly, and if he does it is well the
fact should be known.
The Dalles times-mountaineer. [volume] (The Dalles, Or.) 1882-1904, 1890-06-14

stand he did on this question when
there was such pronounced opposl-
ton, and believe he is following the
traditions Of the party more closely
on the question of finance than those
who have opposite views. The Re
publican party has received the COM
mendation of the country for its sound
financial policy In the past, and, if 1t
does run wild after some vague notion,
it will be endorsed in the future. The
treasury bill provides sufficient coin
age to 90 the business of the country.
and any more than this is imitation,
which will eventually result in great
suffering and depression in trade.
Secretary Window, one Of the ablest
6nanciers in the nation, fully explained
the matter, and showed that if free
coinage was adopted there would be
CONSTANT uTdln OL SlO,OVO,OOO
gold annually to purchase bullion
in foreign countries. OF course,
this bill wonld benefit silver mine
oU ners, by increasing the demand for
the bullion, and consequently enhanc-
ing its value. But the wage-earner
would be forced to work the same
hours a day for his money as he does
now. The free coinage Of silver will
not increase the price Of wheat or of
labor, as these are governed by the
law of supply and demand, which
uever vary. We must produce less
diminish the competition in the labor
market, and be assured Of good crops
before the distress of which such COM
plsint is made will cease.
The Dalles times-mountaineer. [volume] (The Dalles, Or.) 1882-1904, 1890-06-14

The central location of this city and
its adaptaGility to control the trade oi
a large portion of the interior is dem
onstrated every day. For the past
two weeks wool has been harvested,
and buyers have thronged our market
from all portions of the country. The
Dalles handles more wool and wheat
direct from the producers than any
city in the country, and this prestige
will continue if our business men ex-
ert sufficient enterprise to take ad-
vantage of the opportunities presented.
With an open river and railways to
the interior this city would be second
only to Portland in population, CON-
merce and manufactures.
The Dalles times-mountaineer. [volume] (The Dalles, Or.) 1882-1904, 1890-06-14
NEW TO-DAY.
Administrators Slle Of Real Estate.

NIOT1CE is hereby giyer that under and by virtue
IN of an order Of the County Court of the Statt
Of Oregon, for the count, of Wasco duly made and
entered therein Way s. 1890, in the matter of the
final estate of Ruthinda Wallace. deceased the un
dersigned administrat of said estate will, on Fri
day. the llth day of July, 1880. at the hour of
o'clock F. NJ at the curt house door in Dalies City
in wasco county, Oregon sell to the highest bidder
the efor, upon the following terms. viz: One half
cash in han and one half to be paid on OF before
one year with cent interest and taxes secured
by mortgage, the following described real estate,
situated in said county, and belonging to said cstate
Commencing at point 80 rods south of the quar-
ter section corner comm n to sections "a and 81
township north range 10 east Willamette merid-
ian, unning thence west 10 rods, thence n rth 20
rods, thence west 48 rods, thence north 10 rods
thence west 16 rods. thence south 10 rvds thence
west Is yods, thence north rod thence west IS rods
thence north rods, thence west ,ods, thence
south 20 rods. thence west Is rods, thence north
rods, thence west 80 rods, striking a point on the
west line IL rods south of the of sections 2
2S 80 and 81, thence south 143 rods to the south
west corner thence east 100 rods 10 the southeast
corner thence north l30 rods the place of begin
ping, containing l4S acres, more or less, and being
situated in Wasco untv, Oregon.
Dated at Dalles City, Oregon, this 18th day o
June, 1890. o. F. PAXTON.
Administrator of the estate of Ruthinda WaIlsce,
deceased. iunl2
The Dalles times-mountaineer. [volume] (The Dalles, Or.) 1882-1904, 1890-06-14

The expression at the mass meeting
Monday night leaves no doubt that
our citizens desire an early completion
of some system of water-works. Every
resident of The Dalles. who has the
health of his family at heart, is in
terested In this matter, and it makes
little difference whether he is tax
payer or not. Mr.. Nolan, the Sec
retary OF the commission, has the
figures of all estimates by pumping or
gravitation, and the only question to
be decided is, which is the most avail
able and can be placed in operation
the quickest.