davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20
AN APT REPLY.
An Actor Who Saved Himself In a Time
ly Way from a Kings Frown.

An Actor Who Saved Himself In a Time
ly Way feom a Kings Frown.
A well known Danish actor had re-
Gently an order conferred upon him. On
the day OF reception he presented him
self at court to thank the king for the
distinction. A large number of gentle.
men We're assembled in the ante-room
awaiting admission, and, as the room
was very draughty, the actor, who had
Just recovered from severe cold, craved
permission to keep on his hat This was
granted, and our comedian took seat
in one corner and silently rehearsed his
part for the evening At last the equerry
in waiting called out the name of the
actor, who, forgetting he had already
donned his hat, quickly snatched up a
tall sinner from window ledge, and
thus equipped entered the audience
chamber. The king, astonished at the
extraordinary apparition, burst into a
hearty laugh, while the actor was quite
dumfounded at this exhibition of hilar.
ity on the part of the monarch.
MY good friend" the king said at
length, you have afforded me plenty OF
amusement before today Excuse my
saying that l can quite understand your
keeping hat on your head, but what
is the use of the other which you carry
in your hand?"
"Ah, your majesty is right. as always,
replied the artist, rs with gesture OF
alarm he put his hand to his head; 1.-TWO
hats are most certainly too many for a
man who has lost his head" ."-Kiele,
Zeitung.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20
Theory and Practice.

Nine. Tweedledee principal of great
dramatic SCHOOL, was so sorry could
not be present at your debut last night
Did you follow my advice, and hold your
powers in check during the earlier acts,
50 as to reserve yourself for the grand
climax in the fourth act?
New Society Actress-Y-e-s
Mime. Tim so glad. And didn't
the audience go perfectly wild over that
grand climacteric scene in the fourth
act?
New Actress (sadly}-They went be
fore the fourth act-all of them.-New
York Weekly.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20

FAST MAIL TRAIN with Electric lighted END
Steam heated Vestibuled trains between Chi
cago. Milwaukee, st. Paul and Minneapolis.
TRAN -CONTIf ENTAIL ROUTE with Electric
lighted and Steam heated Vestibuled trains pc
tween Chicago and Council Biuns, omana Oh
st. Paul and he Pacific Coast.
GREAT NATIONAL ROUTE between Chicago
Kansas City nd st. Joseph. Mo.
500 MILE OF ROAD reaching all principal
points in Hin ois, Wisconsin. Minnesota, Iowa
Missouri Sou IN Dvkota and North Dakota.
For maps tine tables, rates OF passage ano
freight, etc., apply to the nearest station agen'
of the Chicago Milwaukee q st. Paul Railway, OF
TO any railroad lgent any where In the world.
ROSWELL MILLER, A.V. H.CARPENTEh,
General Ma nager. Gen'l Pass. q L. Agt
rH-For infori nation in reference to Lands ans
Towns owned by by the Chicago, Mllwaukse 9
St Paul Railws Company, write 70 d. ~ hau
gen Land com missioner Milwaukee. Wisconsin
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20
Value of the shock.

You have all varieties of pansies,
SUPPOSE? he remarked. as he entered a
florists store.
Yes, sir"
Let me have some chimpanzees.
please"
The clerk said nothing, but soon pro-
duced some flowers which were dis.
tinctly marked with eyes, nose and
mouth, like Il monkeys face, and said;
This is the variety you want"
Yes; make u buttonhole bouquet"
Yes, sir"
"How much?' asked the customer
when the bouquet was ready.
Nothing"
What! I've never got anything here
under n dollar before"
Its all right" protested the clerk
with weary look: ''the shock is worth
the flowers. ."--Pittsburg Chronicle-Tele.
graph.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20
Nearer Still.

Bloodgood-I say, Travis, who was
that pretty girl you had at the play the
other night? You seemed on delight
fully familiar terms. A cousin, | sup
pose!
Travis-On, no! A much nearer rela
tive than that.
Bloodgood-W What, pray?
Trayis-A sister by rejection. We
are everything to each other now-Bur.
,ington Free Press.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20

Your distressing cough can Le cured.
We know it because Kemp's Bslsam
within the. past few years has cured so
many coughs and colds in this rommun-
ity. Ask some friend who has used it
what he thinks of Kemp's Balsam. There
is no medicine so pure. none 30 effective.
Large bottles soc and 81 at all druggists.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20
What Does II Msany

100 doses one dollar" means simply
that Hoods Sarsaparilla Is the most eco
nomical medicine to buy. because it gives
more for the money than any other prep
aration. Each hottie contains 100 doses
and will average to last a month. while
other preparations taken according to
directions are gone in week. There
fore. be sure to get Hoods Sarsaparills.
the best blood purifier.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20
BuCkLEN's ARNIcA sALyK.

The best salve in the world for cuts
bruises, sores, ulcers, salt rheum, fever
sores. letter, chapped hands. chilblains
corns and all skin eruptions, and posi-.
lively cures piles. or no pay required. l,
is guaranteed to give perfect satisfaction
or money refunded. Price % cents pei
box. For sale bv Hartz & Bshnsen.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20
Mamma Whips.

Friend of the Family am afraid yor
little fellows don't always agree. Yor
light each other sometimes. don't you?
Twins-Yeth, thir, thumtimth.
Friend of the Family-Ah, thought 40
Well, who whips?
Twins-Mamma wipth. Exchange
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20
One of MANY.

Thompson-You look pale and thin,
Johnson. Why will you persist in kill
ng yourself working night and day
such weather as this?
JohnsOn-I am trying to earn money
enough To pay the expenses of week's
Sest lii the country. York Weekly
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20
No I,lnce.

Tramp-Madam, I'm weary and dis
oouraged; can l go out in the barn and
die?
Lady of the House-Poor man! I'm
sorry for you. But you'll have to come
some other time. We're going to have a
dance out there tonight. Harper's Ba.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20
An Important Qualification.

Bunl,er-I'm going to give up study
ing SO hard and learn how to dance.
Hill-What brings you to that deter
,nination?
Bnnker-rve just been invited to join
literary society.-Epoch
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20
Not Engaged.

Pitcher-DO you want man with q
surve?
Baseball Manager What kind of d
>urve have you got?
Pitcher-Curvature of the sline.-
xnwen Citizen.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20
Cooking Up q Reason

Wife-What do you suppose baby il
thinking about?
The Brute-I 'spose he's thinking wha.
10 cry about to-ni~ht II ife
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20

Love will come IN loves own time. +"
warbles poet Love reminds us so much
of hotel waiter.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20
His Nose for News

New Reporter crushing in from the as
sonomical Observatory)-Now | hava a
SCOOP
City Editor-What is it?
Reporter There will be total eclipse
af the sun visible in this country May
e7, the year i9O0.-Chicago Times.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20

1t requires no self-denisl for pawn
broker to keep the pledge.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20
Safe.

II should say that armless girl in the
museum would be safe from marriage
proposals"
why SOP
because nobody can ask for her
hand. Boston Courier.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20
Ask Your Frlsnds About 1t.

The new sash craze for men may possi.
bly, cause pane in the stomach.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20

D BURLINGTON ROUTE c., b. & O. RAIL
- way-Depot First avenue and Sixteenth st.,
j. Young agent
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20

DOCK ISLAND II PEORIA RAILWAY-DE-
III pot First ave enue and Twentieth atreet. F.
Poe Afren
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-08-20

CHICAGo NIL WAUKEE IL ST. PAUL RAIL
~ way-Racine & Southwestern Diyision-De-
pot Twertieth street between First and Second
avenue, +. II. W. Holmes, agent.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1890-01-21
EAST OF TER ROCKIES.
4 New York Official Gets Into a
Fight Through Els POliteneSs.
BRIDGE ACROSS TEE RUDs0N.
An Insane Asylum Attendant Elopes
With One OF the Patients-Mary-
lands Peach Crop-Etc.
BRIDGE ACROSS TEE BUDs0N.
lRBo1AL DISPATCHES TO rHz RzooRD-UNIos.l
AN IMMENSE STRUCTURE.
The Hudson to be Spanned by Ponde
ouS Steel Bridge.


The Hudson to be sranned by a Ponder
Gus Steel Bridge.
NEW YORK, January 20th.-The biggest
OF all bridges is well on its way to things
finite. Congress has been asked by Repre-
sentative McAdo of Jersey City to grant to
the North River Bridge Company the right
part between Hoboken and Fourteenth
street. This project emanates from Gus
tave Lindenthal, an eminent engineer and
bridge builder of Pittsburg.
The incorporators are: Jordan L. Mott
of the Mott Iron Works of New York;
w. A. Roebling and w. F. Roebling, the
famous bridge builders; Charles j. Canda,
once Sub Treasurer of the United States,
and now Vice President of the Western
National Bank of New York city, and half
a dozen leading capitalists of the East.
These gentlemen ask Congress for the
right to build, maintain, equip and operate
bridge, proper approaches thereto and
terminals, appurtenances and works con-
nected Herewith across the Hudson river,
between the State of New Jersey and the
city of New York, and to lay tracks there
on for the connection of railroads and to
facilitate transportation.
1t is stipulated that the bridge shall not
be constructed with single span over the
entire river between established pier lines
in either State. No pier or other obstruc-
ton IS to be constructed in the river be-
tween the pier lines, and the bridge is to
be completed in seven years, unless delayed
by legal proceedings.
The plans have all been prepared. 1t
will be the largest bridge in the world.
The English channel bridge, which is
talked OF, will not compare with it, for its
longest span will be LOO feet, while this
span will be 1850 feet long. 1t is the
length fspan which decides the size of a
bridge, and not the length of the bridge
itself, from an engineering standpoint.
1t is cheaper to bridge the river in q sim
gle span than with pier in the river, be-
cause it is 200 feet down to the rock forma-
ton. The bridge span will be 1850 feet
long and $50 feet above the water, fifteen
feet higher than the Brooklyn bridge.
The material of the bridge will be steel
and steel wire. When the Brooklyn bridge
was built crucible steel wire was used
which cost about cents a pound. Now
wire made of open-hearth steel, more uni
form and just as tough and strong, can be
bought for about cents q pound. Steel
wire saves much dead weight in long
span.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1890-01-21
DUEL WITH FISTS.
a Dispute Between an Englishinan and
Scotchman.

Dispute Between an EnglishInan and
Scotchman.
SCRANTON, January Goth. A brawny
Scotchman and stalwart Englishman had
a fight in a mining settlement on the out
skirts of Scranton. They had got into a
dispute over race characteristics, and it was
decided and agreed that they should settle
the affair by giving one another single
fist punch in the center of the forehead
The one who failed to fall was to be de-
clared the better man, but if neither
went down on the first trial they were 10
try it again, and if each stood up at the end
of the second bout the match was 10 be
called draw.
When all was ready the fighters drew the
cut for the first hit, and the Englishman
won. The Scotchman, who weighed tw elve
pounds more than his opponent, then
towed the scratch and braced himself
Then the word was given and the English
man struck out with his left and hit the
Scotchmau squarely in the middle of the
forehead. 1t was a terrible blow, and it
sounded as though it had split the Scotch
mans skull
He staggered back for ten or twelve feet,
but he didn't lose his balaDce although he
came very near it. His eyes were watery
when he came to standstill, and few
drops of blood trickled from his nos.rils,
but 10 five or six minutes he said he was
ready for his hit.
The Englishman toed the line and the
big Scotchman doubled up his right fist and
knocked the Euglishman fiat. He fell as
though he had been hit with an ak, and for
several minutes he didn't move a muscle
The men labored with him and gave him
restoratives, but for while it looked as if
he would never get up again.
In eleven minutes he began to come to,
and in twenty minutes he was able to stand
up, greatly to the joy of those who had a
hand in the affair. They all tried to keep
the matter quiet, but yesterday it leaked
out. The Englishman says he is all right,
and the Scotchman is satisfied.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1890-01-21
Swindlinc Peasants.

The Pal Mall Gazette says: "The num-
ber of Galician peasants who are said to
have been decoyed into emigration by the
agents, who are now on their trial at Wa
dowice, is over $4,000, of whom 6,000 were
not yet released from military service,
and consequently became deserters. Many
of these wretched people sold their lands
to the emigration agents to pay for grants
of land promised them in America. Their
ignorance was so gross that the agents
hoaxed them in a hundred ways. For in
stance, an electric bell was set up, and
some of the intending emigrants were told
that it was a telegraph communicating
with the palace of the Emperorof America.
The credulous peasants applied for grants
of land by telegraph, and when the bell
tinkled, bringing them, as they were in
formed, favorable reply, they were made
to pay the cost of the imaginary telegram,
with heavy fees besides"
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1890-01-21

Investigating the Charges Against the
Commission.
WASHINGTON, January 20th.-The House
Committee of Reform in the Civil Service
met to- day to hear argument on the resolu-
ton introduced recently by Representative
Ewart TO investigate the charges against
the Civil Service Commission, and the bill
introduced by Representative Houck of
Tennessee to repeal the civil service law
and regulate and improve and classify and
properly apportion the officers and en-
ployes of the public servic to the States and
Territories.
Mr.. Ewart spoke briefly, reciting the
charges which prompted his resolution.
The charge in substance are that one
Campbell, a brother-in-law of Commits
sioner Lyman, gave the prepared examina-
ton papers to person 10 charge of the In
shtute in Washington which prepared ap-
plicants for examination. That Lyman,
knowing about the facts, promoted said
Campbell, and that clerks were appointed
without any examination whatever, and
that the law had been utterly disregarded
in other particulars.
Houck advocated his bill to repeal the
law and improve the service by new
methods of appointment.
Frank Hatton. the editor of the Wash
ipgton Post, said the charges had been pub
lished because he believed them to be true,
and that they could be substantiated.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1890-01-21
ELECTRIC FLASHES.
Condensed Teiegraphic Dispatches From
All Parts of the World.

Condensed Teiegraphic Dispatches From
All Parts of the World.
Stanley will remain IN Egypt for while
to recoup his strength.
Arkansas is said to be receiving a large
number of negro emigrants.
Migel, French Republican, has been
elected Senator from Manches.
Sagasta has again been asked to make an
attempt TO form a Ministry in Spain.
The British man Of war Malabar has been
much damaged, having been aground. She
has arrived at Cadiz.
The disabled steamship Siam, with a
valuable cargo and 400 passengers, has
been towed into Alden by an English steam
ship.
The iocked-out gas workers in London
made an orderly demonstration yesterday,
and gave no opportunity for the police to
interfere.
Emin Pashas condition is much worse.
He is suffering acutely from an ahscess on
the exterior of his skull and partial paraly-
sis of the tongue.
The Senate Committee on Appropriations
will report Senator Hearst's bill, appropri-
ating 81 10000 for Postof1ce site IN San
Francisco, favorably.
John W. Mackay, it is said, has refused
an offer of $4,000 coo cash for his interest
IN the Postal Telegraph lines and cables,
but they are not for sale.
The funeral of Charles Edmund Pilleit,
editorial writer OF the Daily Ne,cs occurred
at New York yesterday and was largely
attended. Pilleit was in California in
1919, and practiced Law for two years in
San Francisco
There is a growing belief IN England
tha. Sir Charles Dixie will re-enter politics,
/ and that he was a victim of q conspiracy
hatched by group of women who person.
ally hated him, and paid for by an enor-
mously wealthy woman of titla, who had
polite personal reasons for desiring his
downfall
Another sensational versoz Of the Meyer.
ling tragedy is published IN the Vienna
| papers. 1t is stated THAI the Archdukt
| Rudolph and Baroness Vetzera were
brother ard sister. the ne,ber of the Bar
oness ana the Emperor Il one time hayins
been lovers, and it was this fact, which has
become known to the Arehduks, tha
caused him to kill hinself.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1890-01-21
Tho Jury Disagreed
, to obtain money for The suppress
icles affecting a gold mining con
We disagreed and been discharged.
Want Foreign Capital.
RIO JANEIRo, January 20th.-Th,
ian Government has decreed tha
eirrn cnrnnanins nnaratinrr in
A HIusquito in the Ear.

For the last fifteen years Mrs. Charles
V. Worthington, of Evansville, Ind, has
been partially deaf, and suffered a great
deal from liberation in her lett ear Dur
ing the time of the trouble she has placed
herself under the treatment of number
of physicians, and although they did much
to alleviate the pain their efforts were not
productive of satisfactory results Last
week she placed herself under the care of
DR.. F. S. Compton, who discovered the
cause of her trouble. it was large mus
quito, which must have been in the ear
for nearly fifteen years. The insect had
lodged in the membrane of the drum of
the ear, causing an liberation which has
never healed up entirely within that time
When the physician removed the cause of
the trouble the patient experienced almost
immediate relief and ordinary sounds,
which heretofore she was unable to hear at
all, were distinctly audible. The physician
is now of the opinion that in the course of
time Mrs. Worthington's hearing will not
only be perfect, but the liberation and
irritation caused by the presence Of the
insect in so tender part as the ear will
entirely disappear.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1890-01-21
RESPECT FOR AGE
Gets New York Official Into Serious
Trouble.

Gets New York Official Into Serious
Trouble.
New YORK, January Goth. = Deputy
Sheriff John J. Lynch, attached to the
Tombs Prison, was passenger on the Belt
line cars on Saturday when woman 20
years old and feeble got on. Lynch arose
aud offered his seat to the old woman, but
it was taken by a young and fashionably-
attired woman.
Raising his hat politely, Lynch informed
her that he had vacated his seat for the
old woman. The young woman's face
flushed holly and she replied that she was
entitled to the seat if she was fortunate
enough to secure it. She then arranged
her wraps, while Lynch remarked, Il
suppose these cars are run for the aristoc-
racy."
at this the young woman called con-
ductor Persifer A. Kennedy and said that
Lynch had grossly insulted her. The con-
ductor offered him his fare and told him to
get off. Lynch refused, whereupon Ken
nedy attempted to eject him. Lynch struck
Kennedy right-hander between the eyes
which laid him fat. Kennedy sprang up
and clinched with Lynch, and the two Wig
orously pummeled each other. The car
driver and another man came to Kennedy s
assistance. Then policeman arrived and
arrested The two combatants. The young
woman who was the cause OF the trouble
disappeared.
In Court to-day Kennedy was discharged
and Lynch held for examination.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1890-01-21
A RED HOT LETTER.
One of the Officials of the Pension Ofiic,
Can Write.

Can Write.
WASHINGTON, January 20th.-Henry A.
Phillips, of New York, Chief of the Mid
die Division in the Pension Office, whose
resignation was recently demanded by the
Commissioner of Pensions, has written the
Commissioner letter, from which the fol-
lowing extracts are made:
II assume that you will not deny that
this request is not of your motion, but
prompted by the Secretary of the Interior
| must respectfully decline to resign, and so
place my neck in the position of the ak of
the executioner, who is Just now so busily
engaged in completing the work begun on
persons like myself and others, who fought
for our country among the Southern battle
fields. -Four of the best men in this Office
reported that the action in my case was in
accord with the evidence on file in my
case. Why does not the Secretary of the
Interior give me an opportunity to defend d
myself?
"He would never have held the power
he now does, and President Harrison would
never have had the power to put him
where he is, if my comrades and myself in
the State Of New York had not labored
with more effect than he did in Missouri
last fall.
"In bidding good-by to this Office, and l
uuuOuutcuIy Sueil fS oOpL Go tllc EA Cdh be
swung, l shall 90 thankful that for brief
session, at least, have had q chance to
serve my suffering and needy comrades in
this place. l confess that as l am human
have to call up all the equanimity 1 pos
sess to contemplate the fact that as I leave
behind me hundreds in this Office who
did their level best to keep our political
opponents in power, leave others who in
the contest of quarter of century ago
did their best to make my comrades eiigi-
BILE for pensions or the grave"
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1890-01-21

Royal Arcanum, who have been investi-
eating sensational charges against members
and officers. have concluded their work.
The accused are II. w. Chandler, one of
the most prominent merchants on the floor
OF the Exchange, Past Grand Regent of the
State, and now member of the Grand
Council; J. F. Coyle, of the firm of Coyle
d Sargent, st. Louis. Grand Treasurer of
the State, and Dr. A. B. Shaw, Grand Med
icsl Examiner Of the State.
The charges were conduct unbeeoming
members of the order, defrauding fellow
members, and falsifying books and ac-
counts. These charges grew out of min
ing transaction by which the accused
placed property known as the Fanny
mine among members of the order.
1t is charged that they made false repre-
sentations by which they secured from
members of the order enough money for
small share of the mine to pay for all of it,
leaving them owners of the controlling in
terest, for which they were out no money.
The mine subsequently, proved worthless.
Voluminous testimony has been taken and
will be laid before the Supreme Council at
Boston