davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26
SOME Fun.

Detected Youth should like to re-
turn this engagement ring purchased
here a few DAYS ago.
Jeweler - Didn't it suit the young
lady;
ID Yves, but another young man
ha, already given her one just like it
and I would like to exchange it for a
welding present.
Poverty may not be a crime but it gets
more punishment than any crime does.
Guest-Waiter, bring me cup Of cot
fee.
Waiter-How will you have it, sir
weak or strong;
I'D like it weak, but not week after
next Hurry up.
Charge Of the light brigade-Seyenty-
five cents per lamp per night.
Mrs. Bloodgood-What. not an open
fireplace nor a stove in the whole house?
how does your father warm his slippers,
Willie?
Willie Cruefully)-warms EN- on me,
ma am.
No one wants to put out woman who
blazes with diamonds
Agnes should think these long tun-
nels would be very dangerous while
travelling.
Mabel-They are if you are not en-
gagged.
Cholly-I am practising on the type
writer every day now.
Mollie-I thought there was an i'm
provement in your counting here lately.
sucker (whO lives on his friends
What's them; Beets; No thanks, 1
never eat beets
Blunt-Does YOU credit, old man. 1t
would look litsle like canabalism, that's
fact
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26
Eirsiuia fire. grrss.
BOS-BONa

A boil on the stove is worth two on
the neck.
Kind words are ike bald heads, they
can never dye.
Silence is golden; but it is the other
fellows silence that is meant
The game Of blind mans buff suggests
fellow feeling for fellow-creature.
In the lap Of luxury one forgets the
lapse Of time and the slaps Of conscience.
Mystery lends charm to almost every
thing excepting clearinghouse mince-
pie.
A man IS happiest when he can forget
all the mean things he knows about hlm-
self.
Il is said that a man from the Pine
Tree State can be told BY the pitch Of his
voice.
Boston is called the modern Athens
because grease is always to be found at
he hub
A bear seldom lives longer than twenty
years. unless he infests the stock ex-
change
The man who is employed in afeather-
store Is apt to get down on his knees
pretty often.
Nature has wisely arranged matters 50
that man can neither pat his own back
nor kick himself
Tho phrase Everything goes Is not
absolutely correct For instance. there
n the Keely motor.
It = a risky business 70 engage
chemist in a war Of words, a. he Is al
ways ready with a retort.
Poets must sufer before they can
write. saws a philosopher. After that
it Is other people who suffer.
What is a laundry. mother: IT Is
place. my child. where your father
sends his shirts 70 be torn into ribbons
A novelist asks in a recent title.
Would You Kill Him: Certainly, II
he we're 4 tOm-Cat who murdered sleep
III the back shed
A South Carolina woman possesses the
mysterious power Of making crockery
and furniture fy around the room. or
course she is married.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26
sbe cave Him the Reason.

"How happens it, Julia-that ring on yous
finger
That costly and elegant solitairc3
And why in the parlor so long did you hnser.
Last evening thought you detested young
Blair"
"why that's what told the horrid young
man. sir"
said Julia, and blushed to the roots Of her
hair.
"But. papa, he wouldn't take no for an
answer,
And he brought-a good deal-of-pressura
10 hearH
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26
How 1t Works In Georgia.

An enthusiastic Prohibitionist, when
he learned that his fellow-passenger was
from Georgia, tackled him at once Il
am very glad to know, sir, ~ he said,
shat YOU are a resident of that grand
old State. What's the latest prohibition
news from your secdon:" Well, re-
piled the Georgian, people were little
slow in coming round to buying it by
the quart at fust, but they've got right
smart used 10 it now, stranger.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26

There Is a queer explanation given Of
the reason why the people Of CONSTANT
noplc tolerate so many dogs in the streets
Of that city. IL is in effect that when a
MuSsulman commits a SIN he prays and
pays to have it forgiven. After this is
done he takes a piece Of bread and breaks
Il into bits, which he throws to the dogs.
II the latter accept he food il is a sure
sign that the sinner IS forgiven. II they
refuse 10 eat IT, he is not forgiven The
more dog that roam around, the more
bread will bo eaten and the more sin for
given
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26

and commits all sorts Of atrocities upon
the human form divine. Perhaps some
of these fiends have been taking liber-
ties with the digniied legislators them
selves. JUST imagine bucolic states
man placed before his constituents in
the STYLE above shown Shall such things
he: No mo tho sword Of vengeance
has slept in its sheath too long. The
amateur photographer must so.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26
she Mnnted 10 sleep AgaIn.

George-Marian. 1 just came in and
found YOU upon the sofa asleep, and
please don't be- mad with mel kissed
you.
Marian-Why, George. yawning) |
believe I'm not half awake vet
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26
Keeping Up Appearances.

The Editor Won't you remove your
overcoat, Nj. Fervid?
Mr. Fervid, (the poet, who has just left
his mcle's)-Alas, sir, you know not
what You ask.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26
JEFFERSON WOOLEN MILL
Formerly POrter's Factory.

Under the above mentioned name the old
"Porters Factory" which in days gone by en-
joyed almost national reputation for excel
lent manufactures, will be operated by the un.
designed. Necessary repairs have been made
and improved machinery introduced, and il is
our expectation TO maintain the reputation Of
the mill and to meet the demand OF the public
for first-class goods.
The Highest Market Price will be paid for
Wool delivered at the Mill or at such points as
may be designated.
Orders for Cloths, Yarns &c, will receive
prompt attention.
Respectfully,
J.J. J0BE & co.
Post office-Ripon, Jefferson County, VIVA
j. J. Jobe & Bro will continue 10 operate the
Mill at Brucetown, Frederick County, Virginia,
and will pay the top market price for Wool de-
liyered there.
April 10, 1888.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26
PriCate Sale.

4 VERY desirable place of Il acres, mile
"A from Charlestown, suitable for home or
summer residence. Two dwelling houses 5
rooms each. and all necessary out buildings
Apply to A. w. CRAMER,
Charle.town, JEFF. Co., W. Va.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26

Is It not worth the small price of 10 cents
to free yourself of every symptom of these
distressing complaints if YOU think so call
at our store and get bottle of Shiloh's vi
taliTer. Every bottle has printed guaran-
tee on it, use accordisgly, and if it does you
no good it will cost YOU nothing. Sold by
George T. Light
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26

MOULD inform the public that every Pre-
w scription that comes to my store is pre-
pared by me individually. Persons can find
me at night at the room over the old Sheriifs
Office, Jail Building. Respectfully,
July l6. 1881. GEO. T. LIGHT
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26

We have a speedy aud positive Cure for
Catarrh, Diphtheria. Canker Mouth. and
Headache, in SHILOH'S CATARRH
REMEDY. A Nasal Injector free with
each bottle. Use it if YOU desire health
and sweet breath. Price 80 cents. Sold
by GS0. T. Ligh,
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26

Trains No. Az 4i9 and Az are daily except
Sunday; Train No. 449 runs Sunday only.
Additional mixed trains leave southwark at
2.3l a. m. and SIT a. m. and arrive at Harri-
sonburg at 9.0s a. m. and 5.5op. nj. ex Sunday.
WESTWARD.
Train AIS connects at Harpers Ferry with
Vestibuled Limited Mt 1855 p. m, arriving in
Pittsburgh at s.55 p. n Columbus 2.45 next
morning. Chicago 1885 next morning and
with Cincinnati Vestibuled Limited at 4.39 p.
m, arriving in Cincinnati at 40 a. m. next
morning. st Louis 655 p. NJ. next evening.
EXCURSION TICKETS will be sold to par.
ties of ten or more between all ticket stations
on the Valley Division-Good for two days.
For tickets and further information apply to
& o. Agents or 10 b. +. Bond. Pass. Agent,
Baltimore, c. +. Dudrow, Travelling Passenger
Agent. Winchester, Va.
b. & o. Palace Sleeping Cars are run through
TO Cincinnati st. Louis, Chicago and Pittsburg
on all express trains.
j. T. 0DELL, Gen'l Manger
CHAS. o. SCULL, Gent Passenger Agent.
T.C. PRINCE, Superintendent
Feb 5. 1890.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26

Aroused atLast.

An outraged people are at last getting
up and shaking themselves. In several
Of the State legislatures bills have been
introduced to protect the public against
the amateur photographer, who goes
about with his little snap instrument
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26
RO0rders Wanted.

THE Misses Ware having removed to the
l. dwelling on Mt. Paryo" recently occupied
by Mr.. Jno. p. Brown and family, will take
few boarders. The house is very convenient
one-delightfully situated.
Miss Lizzie Ware will continue her Mantua-
Making.
April s. 1888
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26
Shenandoah Valley Railroad.
ST. TYLER, RECEIVER.
Schedule in Effect February o, 1890.

Schedule Ia Effect February q, 1890.
LEAVE cHARLEsTowS-souTHwA
$50 A. NJ. Daily-Memphis Express Roanoke
and intermediate stations and
all points South and Southwest
Through Pullman Sleepingcars from
New York and Philadelphia 10
Roanoke, Chattanooga and Mem
phis.
1911 A. NJ Daily-N Orleans Express from New
York, Philadelphia and Baltimore
With day coaches TO Roanoke max
ingconnection through 10 the South.
Carries through Pullman Sleeper
TO New Orleans via Harrisburg.
LEAVE NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS..
2:0i A. NJ. Daily Baltimore Express. from all
points South, for Washing ton. Bal
timore. Harrisburg. Philadelphia
and New YORK Carries through
Pullman Sleeper from New Orleans
to Philadelphia via Harrisburg
2:5s A. NJ. Daily-New York and Philadelphia
Express. from Mobile, Memphis,
Chattanooga and all points South.
For Philadelphia and New York
Sleeping cars through 10 New York
via Harrisburg.
Ticket Agents will furnish all Information
and through schedules upon application.
o. HOWARD ROVER, Gent Pass. Agt.
Feb. IL, 1889. Roanoke, Va.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26
notice.. NOTICE!

WE are the leader in Low Prices and Head
w Quarters for Tinware. To prove the fact
to you we are selling the best Fruit Can in the
market, with a guarantee with every one, at
the small price of 40 cents per dozen. Hoping
you will call before buying elsewhere we are,
Yours, very truly,
September ), 50. c. d. EBY.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26
Diamond Dyes.

A S the Spring advances we call attention TO
"A a full stock of Diamond Dyes, and guar
antee them to color Ribbons, Dresses, Hats,
Feathers aud Cotton Goods.
GEO. T. LIGHT,
Druggist, Next Door to Post Office.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26

DAINTS. Oils, Varnshes, Window Glass,
i Putty, Paint Brushes, &c. We have large
stock of these goods on hand to which we call
the attention of the people. Lewis pure Lead,
pure Linseed Oil and Lucas celebrated Pre-
pared Paints, ready to apply, in all colors in
cans from one pound to one gallon. We have
all colors, either dry or in oil. Examine our
stock before purchasing elsewhere.
Apr. IS, So. AISQUITH & co.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26
To the Public.

HAVE in stock some superior brands Of
i Whiskeys. among them a Sour Mash Ken
lucky Whiskey highly recommended as una
dulterated and pure.
Nov. 22. JOHN s. YESTERDAY & co.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26
Baltimore and Ohio Railroad
Time Table in Effect December 10Th, 1889.

Trains No. 400. AIS and AS are daily exceDt
Sunday Train No. $50 runs Sunday only.
Additional mixed trains leave Charlestown
4.O5 y. m. and ll6 a. m, and arrive at Harpers
Ferry at $40 p. m. and l.55 a. m. ex. Sunday.
SOUTHWARK. All 4l9 Az 44s
Stations. Pass. Pass. Mix. Mix.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26

S0APS.-We have in store i large stock of
y Toilet Soaps. We call special attention to
our 70 and cent soaps. NSQUITH & co.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26
MISS AMELIA HICKS

IMPORTED Green and White CASTLE Soap,
i and Imported Bay Rum.
IN GALLONS pure Norwegian Cod Liver
~ Oil and > gallons Extra Pure White ely
cerine.
IN Richardson's improved Butter Color, three
sizes % and so cents and s1OO. Fine stock in
store. AISQUITd & co.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26
ChaniOis Skins.

NHAMOIS SKINS from ten to sixty cents.
" Carriage Sponges and Boston Coach Oil.
Aug. 80, 1855 AISQUITH & co.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26

For sale at DIR BISHOPS Drug Store in
Charlestown, Jefferson Co., w. Va.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1890-03-26

CHARLEsTowN. w. Va Sept. p, 1888
Having used the preparation made by the
late Dr. Schefier, Dentist, of Charlestown, 1t
gives me pleasure to recommend its use as
valuable dentifrice and wash for the mouth
and gums.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1890-06-05
A Haunted House.

This body of ours has been likened to tene-
ment. 1t often has a haunted apartment-the
stomach. Scared by the eldrich sprlte, dyspep.
sa, digestion flies and refuses to return. What
can break the SPELL what can raise the ban laid
upon the unhappy organise We answer unhesi.
tatingly, Hostetters Stomach Bitters, and we
are warranted in the response by the recorded
testimony of myrads, covering Il period OF over
third OF century, course of the Bitters
taken in any stage OF the aflliction, and persist
entity followed, viii terminate in cure positive
not partial. The Bitters restore tone to the cpl
gastric nerve renews and purifes the juices
exuding from the cellular tissue that act upon
the food digestiyely, exrels bile from the stom
ach and the blood, and promotes a regular habit
of body. Malaria, kidney complaint, nervous
ness, rheumatism and neuralgia give way to this
medicine
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1890-06-05
YOU WILL LIKE 1T.
Try the Most Popular Journal in Ten.
neSSee one Year.

Every citizen who desires to be well
informed should read newspapers, and
should make good choice Of news.
papers. No paper can take the place
Of our country newspaper, and il YOU
take only one paper always subscribe
for paper published in your own
county.
But every intelligent citizen should
have a newspaper which is published
at the capital OF the state. and which
will give him the greatest amount o
general and political news
The weekly Journal which gives
most news and gives it most impair
TALLY is the Nashville Banner.
The Banner gives all the news
without coloring it for party purposes
and discusses all questions freely
frankly and fairly.
The Banner IS an eight page paper
and is very cheap at the subscription
price of $1.00 per year.
And we mako it cheaper still by
clubbing with the COMET and sending
both papers one year for S1.75; six
months for 90c, three months for 45c
Send for sample copies.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1890-06-05
oarfleld's Monument Dedicated,

CLEVELAND, O., May 30.-The Gar
field Memorial in Lake View GENE.
terry was dedicated to-day with impos-
ing ceremonies in presence of the
President of the United States, mem
bers of his cabinet and distinguished
men from all parts Of the country.
The memorial is q colossal structure
towering 165 feet above an eminence
in the cemetery which overlooks the
city and surrounding country. The
edifice cost $4,000, OF which almost
one hall was contributed by the PEG
pie OF Cleveland, the remainder com
ing from every State and Territory in
the Union and from many foreign
lands.
The exercises Of to-day began with
a parade, military and civil soc ieties
the procession forming in the center
Of the city and moving to the GENE
terry, distance OF five miles. The
city Is filed with strangers and thous
ands OF people lined Euclid avenue
and hocked in from the interesting
streets long before the hour for the
procession to move. The decorations
along the line Of march aud all over
the city, for that matter, were the
finest ever seen here.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1890-06-05
1t is Wise to Forget
Your neighbours faults.

Your neighbor's faults.
All the SANDER you have ever heard.
The numerous times you have told
a servant how TO do things and the nu-
merous times she has forgotten. Try
again, and perhaps she will remember.
The date OF your neighbours new
dress, so that she will not believe,
when for some special reason she has
to wear it Il long time, that you re-
member it from season to season.
Forget the faults of some OF your
friends, and remember the tempta-
tions.
Forget the fault-fnding and give a
little thought 10 the cause which pro-
voked it.
Forget the peculiarities OF your
friend and only remember the good
points that make you fond of her.
Forget any personal QuarrelS or his
tories which you may have heard by
accident, and which, if repeated
would seem a thousand times worse
than they are.
Forget that somebody's hair i,u ugly
remember only how soft and beautiful
are her eyes.
Blot out, as far as possible, all the
disagreeables Of life-they will come
but they only grow larger when you
remember them, and the constant
thoughts OF the acts Of meanness, Of
worse still, malice will only tend t.
make you more familiar with them
and to almost grow tolerant of them
Obliterate everything disagreeabl,
from yesterday; start out witha clear
sheet for to-day aud write upon t,.foi
sweet memory's sake, only those
things that are lovely and lovable
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1890-06-05

The project for railroad to connect
this country with the South American
republics is little further along than
it ever was before, inasmuch as the
President has asked Congress to APP
propriate funds for our share OF the
preliminary surveys. Many people
seem to think Mr.. Helper is the father
OF this idea. The fact is, however, that
John A. Lynch, OF Washington, was
the man who launched the project al
least fifteen years ago, some time be-
fore Helpers scheme was heard Of
and Lynch's bill, which included all
the principal suggestions now made
by the President and Mr.. Blaine, has
been knocking at the doors OF Con
gress, off and on, for the past ten
years. His bill was first introduced il
the Senate by Senator Davis in 1880
subsequently by Senator Morgan, anC
three times successfully by Senator
Sherman.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1890-06-05
Things to Remember.

II is always we'll to remember that
in saying things against any religion
you are not only guilty OF bad taste,
but you do not know whose feelings
you may hurt.
1t is good to remember that many
words and loud voice never eonsti-
tuted conversation,
That the elaborate dress bought
last spring should be lesson to you,
and that this year you will choose a
quieter one, better suited to daytime
wear and to your position in life.
That all your own children are not
swans, nor your neighbors' children
ugly ducklings.
That the long lane which has nc
turning is to be compared to that one
which says, "The darkest hour is just
before dawn"
That virtue is not alone peculiar tC
your own family and friends, but thai
there are good people with whom you
have not even bowling acquaintance
II is also good to remember JUS
what the surroundings were when
you formed such decided opinions
and to think little bit before you ex
press them.
Remember, too, the beginning o
most things in this life, and then your
judgments are apt to be more tru,
and greater to Your own credit.
The evil spoken of another woman
is always set down to envy.
It's best Of all to remember tina
the unkind word left unspoken, tn,
unkind look averted, the unkind man
ner changed to one of sweetness an
dignity, are never regretted.-La
dies Home Journal.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1890-06-05
Got His little Pony.
Nashville Herald.

Nashville Herald.
An incident showing the generous
kindness Of heart which characterizes
Col. Jere Baxter occurred at the
Maplewood sale.
The little son of Mr.. Thad Mason
whose unfortunate death at Louisville
is still lamented, was among the visi
tors, and tears were coursing dowr
his cheeks as he looked lovingly at the
sleek ponies which were to be sold
His genuine grief attracted the atten
ton of Col. Baxter, who asked tht
cause and received the sobbing reply
81 want one OF those ponies so bad
and they won't buy it for me-"
"Well, my little man." said Col
Baxter, "you pick out the one you
want and take it home"
"Thank you, sh, so much, Mr.. Bax
ter" said the little fellow, land / will
get fifty votes for you."
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1890-06-05
Scraps Of Information.

The fees for probaling the will Of
Junius S. Morgan in England are said
to be 100000,
A Georgia man had to sen his last
cow to pay tho expense Of lawsuit
about some chickens
The largest vineyard in the world is
owned by senator Stanford aud is in
Trhama iuoty, Cal and covers three
Thousand, eight hundred and twenty.
five acres.
DR.. Eugene J. Kaufman, Of New
York, was divorced on Tuesday from
Minnie Seligman, an actress, and on
Wednesday he married Mary Helen
Sykes, with whom, he says, he had
been in love for five years. He mar
ried Miss Seligman in 1886.
Two years ago colored woman
slipped down on streetin Cincinnati.
A white man named James Taylor as,
sisted her tohcr feet without reference
to color or previous condition. Last
week she died, and in her will she left
him $4,000 in cold cash,
The German court is Just moving
into Il splendid new palace at Pots.
dam, Emperor William has had an
electric railway constructed for bring,
ing the dishes from the kitchen to the
state dining.room. The reception and
ball rooms will e the finest in Eu.
rope.
A steel splinter that had become
imbedded in the eye OF an Albany
workman was drawn out by means oil
powerful magnet and the patients
ey esight saved. The bit of steel was
about three.eighths of an inch long
and sixteenth OF an inch thick.
A midnight marriage took place al
Cakes, N. D., recently, the parties
being S. S. Latta, OF Verona, N. D..
and Miss Minnie Thompson, Of Gin
cinnati. The cour;ship had been car
ried on by mail, and the couple me-
for the first time the day they were
married.
The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1890-06-05
Clapp viii Not Run.

Memphis Special, May &c
Han. w. L. Clapp was asked by an
Avalanche reporter to-day it he still
intended to go before the convention
as a candidate for Governor "No,"
answered Mr. Claop emphati'ally II
shall not ! am not candidate, and
my name will most positively not be
presented ia the convention at any
stage of the Proceedings IN iact il !
desired t remain in the race, should
not do 50 on Maj Boards account He
is candidate far the Supreme bench.
and my candidacy, If persisted in,
would initiate against him. | am out,
altogether out"