The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1890-11-20
MlscELLANeous.

-Celetlne--''Why dldn' t you take that
seat the gentleman offered you?" Earn
estine-''Because l would have had to
sit next to that woman whose Gress
doesn't harmonic in color with mine"
Domestic servants are so scarce in
Montreal that women in want of help
are said to visit the jail with the view
of engaging young women to work for
them at the close Of theft terms of inns
prisonment:
Jockey = 'Can't ride to-day, Mr..
Petit" Pettit-''Wbat's the matter2
Are you sick?'' Jockey-"No, I'm not
sick; but I've got a silver in my finger
and I'm afraid they'd make it out that
was overweight. Judge.
-Lady-''I would like to get serv-
ant-girl. The family consists of my
husband, myself and five children"
Employment Agent Every sorry,
madam, but you will have to kill off
some of the children"
--Manderville Virgins, of New
Brighton, Staten Island, suggests drown
ing as humane form of capital punish
ment. He says he came near being
drowned not long ago himself. He went
far enough to discover that death by
that method would be painless.
old gentleman tat his daughters
wedding)-"My dear, Idon't see how 1
am to get along without you" Bride
''Never mind, pa. Since the ceremony
was performed; my husband has con-
fessed that he hasn't enough saved to
go to housekeeping; so you may not lose
me after all."-N: Y. Weekly.
Eighteen words have come into the
language = probably temporarily, most
of them = to denote the act or state Of
electric killing. They are as followsi
Electromort, thanelectrize, thanatelec-
trize, thanatelectrisis, electrophon, cleo
tricise, electrotony, e1ectrophony, cleo
/ troctony, electroctasy, electricide, elecs
! tropenize, electrothenese, electroed.
electrocution, fulmen, voltacuss and
! Observation-Disclosures
Don't clean your nails in public, Y
said critic to Detroit Free Press re-
/ porter. ut is unspeakably valgar. Thes
toilet should be made in the privacy of
ones chamber, or, at any rate, out of
the public gaze. If there is anything
in the world that disgusts person it is
to see a fellow pull out jackkrife in
street car and begin pairing away at his
hands. Don't do it, for it is vi lgar to
I the highest.
| "A gentleman who wrote concerning
the price of board in a country town Is
said to have received this telegram in
reply: Board, $50 q week, including
washing up the carriage and piano
agent Robinson" He wrote in an
swer that though both piano agent and
carriage needed cleaning, he was not
accustomed to such charges in board
bill, and soon after learned that the
original copy had run thus: Board,
$40 week, including washing, use of
carriage and piano. Agnes Robinson. :"
The annual product of roofing slate
is given by Superintendent of the Gen.
sus Porter as S2S, 800 squares, of value
i of 50, 81, of which Pennsylvania's
share IS 474, 602 squares and S1,636, 945.
Of slate Tor other purposes the value is
given at 1869, 582, Pennsylvania part
being 1914, S31; total value of all slate
/ produced, So, 444,863; Pennsylvania, S2,-
: Oil, ne. - Pittsburgh ChronicleTele-
graph.
The man who was hurrying into the
hatter's was on business. He wanted
his old hat. 'When did you leave it
here?" 81 dunno, was the reply. They
hunted over a great pyramid of hats and
found it, labeled July 2. When he went
out the halter said: ''That man bought
] new hat here and when he went out
said that he would call for it in half an
hour. 1t has now been four weeks. We
throw away seven or eight hundred old
hats every year for which the owners
are going to call in half an hour. -
Lewiston Journal.
The London Hospital tells of q
seamstress, who, like Hoods pathetic
heroine in the "Song of the Shirt, /"
worked till the stars shone on the roof.
Her eyesight failed, and the story goes
on: "She saw at the same time four
hands, four needles and four seams
She at first treated them as an illusion,
but at the end of some days, in con-
sequence of weakness and prolonged
mental anxiety, she imagined that she
was really sewing four seams at once,
and that God, touched by her misfor-
June, udu WOEh0u d mIFdCIS III u6E
favor"
According to calculation made by
the Economists Beige, the cost of firing
a 11O-pound gun is, in round numbers,
1892, divided as follows: 900 pounds of
powder, $3.50; 1880 pounds projectile,
S435; silk for cartridge, SIT; total 1882.
But this is not all. The 11O-pound gun,
it appears, can be fired but 95 times,
and after that becomes incapable of be-
ing used, and requires repairs. Now,
the cost of the piece being 49,, 400, it is
necessary to estimate the cost of wear
at about 1868 for each shot, thus raising
the cost of each charge to 81, 700.
They struck town Tuesday, pictures
of rural health and unsophisticated hap
piness, says tie Sidney IN. Y. Record.
Down our main street they wandered,
side by side, hand in hand. They saw
not the light of heaven; naught but the
light of the gentle fame of love illum-
mated their path and enabled them to
see their way to Justice Pierce's, where
their aching, throbbing hearts were
soldered into one, blissful and indi-