The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1890-11-19
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

n
his ime.-Laorence american.
Enough may be as good as a feast, but
a feast is good enough for most of u.s.
Yen0Wine's Neos.
Why doesn't an English syndicate buy
Canada's debt9 There's millions in it
Pittsburg Telegraph
Ladies, never powder dlmpled cheek.
1t can do execution well enough without
being loaded.-Paek.
Unless man is agreeable to all the
women he meets they go around plying
his wife.-AtchisoR Globe.
U-"What makes Smith so straight9"
I-'I don't know, unless it is his circum-
stances. ."-Teras Sittings.
Austin has very precise business man
who never pays visit without demand
ing a receipt for it.-Teras SBtingS.
Marriage is not a lottery; it is a rattle.
One man gets the prize, while the Others
get the shake. .-Indianapolis JouraaL
Book Agent have just the kind of
work you want" Chappie -"But my
deah fellow, don't want work of any
hluus -LHdtdhdpObtS oOU'HdS'
First Girl (proudly) )-"Our baby can
say pa and ma" Second GIrl-"Dat's
muffin. My cousin, wots rich, 'us got
er wax one wot kin do dat. Life.
OF all the queer men of the times
And unto oranks the nearest,
The man who asks you questions IS
Undoubtedly the querist
-Munseys Weekly.
Mrs. Dobbins (reading)-"Countess
Maria Won Kensky, of Bohemia, has
bagged 1873 hares in one day" Dobbins
-"Her husband will soon be baldheaded
at that rate. ."-Epoeh.
"Kitty," said the lover, as they sat in
the dark corner of the piazza-"K Kitty,
close your eyes" "Why so, George"
''If you don't everybody will be able to
see us. ."-Harper's Bdzar.
An exchange says there are 25O,OO0
women married annually in London.
The average Seattle woman thinks her
self lucky if she is married four times in
a lifetime. me.-Sedttle Press.
Dream on, dream on" the singer cried,
And reused him from his trance
"Oh, how l wish that you,n he sighed,
Would give me half a chance"
Washington Post.
A Canadian doctor has just been testi-
fying that a murdered mans heart
stopped fright in the middle of beat.
That's nothing; policemen often do the
same thing Utica Herald.
She-"There goes poor Miss Price with
her fiance. Why, the man is old enough
to be her father and ugly enough to be
her brother" He-"Oh, but he is rich
enough to be her husband. life.
A student who acted as a waiter at a
White Mountain hotel the past summeris
/, about to marry the daughter of family
at whose table he served. All things
come to him who waits.-B0stOR Post
Silver and gold bands for the hair are
very popular among fashionable ladies,
but the brass band makes more noise in
the world-especially if it contains bass
drum and bassoon. .-Jeceters Circular.
He's surely a difficult person TO kill,
His frame seems of adamant;
He's dying each day, but remains with us
STILL
The oldest inhabitant"
Boston Courier.
Miss Passee examining the medal of a
recent graduatel l-"I have a medal, too"
Young Friend-"You hayel Why on
earth don't you wear it1" Miss Passee
with a sigh 81 would, but l can't get
the date off of it "-Harpsr's Basar,
He-"Shall we marry in October or
Aprill" She (carelesslO O-"Really, l
don't know. Let's toss up and see." He
feeling in his pockets)-''B Jove, l
haven't penny" She Qrigidlyl-"Ah3
1t isn't necessary to toss. ."-Ne'o York
World
smithers Cwho had just proposed)-
"Why do you smile' Is my proposition
so utterly ridiculous that" Li2ette
--"Not at all, Mr.. Smithers. am only
looking pleased. bet Mr.. Hicks box
of candy I'd have the refusal Of you with
in week. "-Nelo York Sun
A young man had been talking to
bored editor for quite quarter of an
hour, and at last observed; "There are
some things in this world that go without
saying" ayes, " said the editor, "aud
there are still more persons in the world
who say good deal without going. ~
| London Globe.
Miss Terriut-"When mommer and
were in Yurrup, oh, the awfulest thing
happened There was a priuce-and o
couut--and-and they fought a duel
about poor me--with pistols Yabsley
-"Ah! were they loaded" Miss Ter
riut-'No, they weren't! They were
Just as sober as could be. '-hadidRdpolis
Journal.
Miss Flora (forty-fve and homely-
"Oh, Mr.. Blunt, had such strange
dream last night" Mr.. Blunt-'What
was it, Miss Flonl" Miss Flora-'I
dreamed that we were married and on
our wedding tour. Did you ever have
such dream" Mr. Blunt (energeucaliyl
mo, indeed never had the night
mare in my life. ~ IeIas SlftiRgs
White hair is the court color throue't