Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1890-01-19

A good story comes from the railroad
depot, and as the fair occurred on one of
the trains-or the cars-it will not be out Of
place in this column.
The Oregon express was rafting along
southwark verg early in the morning, and
had Just passed Dixon, when suddenly a
very large corpulent gentleman, who occu-
pied seat near the heater, and whose sono-
rous snore had kept the entire car awake
during the previous three hours, gave vent
to a wild yell, and began TO prauce about
the aisle in a manner that caused many to
believe he had gone daft. Where is ii?
Where is il? say!' be exclaimed, and he
began to poke under the seats with his
cane, excitedly. Where is il? Who's got
ii? Where is it? 1 say"
where's whai?' asked the conductor
who had Just entered the car in search Of a
passenger who got on at Dixon.
why, my vallse," said the stout gentle
man, who was now very red in the face
from STOPPING to look under the seats. Il
was taking a little nap, and had my two
valises beside me-a big one and little
one-and when | WOKE up jast now one
of them the little one, was gone. Some
body's got it, sir, and 1 wish you would
find it for me-"
why didn't you put it in the baggage
car and check it? We are not supposed to
watch your baggage if you persist in crowd
ing it into the passenger cars" and the
conductor proceeded on his way without
paying any further attention to the matter.
"Oh, of course" roared the irate passen-
ger, "you blank fellows are only supposed
to look pretty If that valise is gone I'll
sue the blank company, that's what I'll
do. I'm not going to put myself to lot
of blankety blank blank trouble checking
my baggage. Ill-"
What was in the valise ?" asked an
elderly gentleman wearing a travelling cap,
and who had been aroused by the disturb
ance.
| understanding of very much value,
but it's blank annoying just the same, and it
won't prevent me from kicking up big
row about it, either"
perhaps you left it at the other end of
| the car or under a seat some place and for
got where" suggested middle-aged man,
who looked like commercial traveller.
Under seat be BANKED l'' retorted the
owner of the valise. Don't you suppose
know where l left it? I'm no blank
idiot. Somebody stole it; that's what"
Just then the conductor returned and in
formed the Tuning passenger that he re-
membered having seen Chinaman sitting
in the seat next to where the valises were
some time previous. HE got on at Marys-
vile and left the train at Sacramento"
added the conductor.
! AHA ~ howled the coTpulent gentleman,
stamping his feet with rage. "a BANKED
Chinaman He's the thief. Why do they
allow such creatures to ride in the same
car with white people? I'll have the whole
BANKED city Of Sacramento searched, that's
what I'll do, and the railroad will have to
stand the bill" He was now fairly beside
himself with rage, and pranced from one
end of the car to the other, cursing and
gesticulatiDg wildly with his arms-all to
the intense annoyance of the lady passen-
gers who were in the car.
Presently the brakeman came into the
car. and, upon seeing this unusual commo-
ton, asked what was the matter.
"Why, COMPOUNDED pig-tailed, copper
| colored, blank blank of Chinaman has
stolen my valise, that's what's the matter.
And you fellows have been asleep instead
of watching passengers baggage"
Have you looked for it p
Looked Why, I've looked every
where"
Under the seats?'
Eyes, and every place else
"Let me hunt while"
Suiting the action to word, the brake
man picked up the stove poker, and began
| to rummage around among the seats.
Where were you sitting lasl?" he finally
asked.
Fright here in the corner"
| The brakeman looked under this seat,
and then on top of it. The passenger S
oyercoat lay where it had been carelessly
| thrown over the arm-rest of the seat. This
| the brakeman threw aside, and there lay
| the identical valise. 1t had been there all
the time, and neither it nor the coat had
| been disturbed at any time during the
passengers search about the car.
The stout gentleman's eyes began TO
bulge, and he was almost speechless.
| "Wha-wha-did you find it?" he finally
stammered, and the passengers all began
to roar with laughter.
Didn't find it at all, replied the brake
man. ut was there all the time"
Look here, young man." said the gen.
| tieman, who was even madden now than
he was before, 81 think you are prevari-
Gator, and as soon as get to Frisco I'll
see that you are fired off OF this road. You
put that valise there and you know it,
One of our local business men returned
| the other day from a visit to the Shasta
district, having spent several days at Sisson.
III speaking of his trip to q reporter he
said: There is man up at Sisson named
| Maxwell who has invented steam sleigh,
and it beats anything l ever saw. l wit
messed several experimental trips of the
invention, and was more than satisfied that
it could accomplish all that is claimed for
it. As the inventor has not got his ma.
chine patented, | am not at liberty to tell
you Just how it worked, but at the same
time will not be abusing the confidence
placed in me by praising it. | saw it run
over a road which was buried under four
feet of snow just as gracefully and smoothly
as duck glides over a pond. A number
of well-to-do citizens of that country have
| taken an interest in the invention, and a
stock company is being formed to place
several sleighs in operation. 1t will
| be a great benefit for the transportation
of passengers and mails between places
which are otherwise completely shut out
| from the world during the winter. They
are talking of placing one on the Fall river
or Adm route from Sisson. 1t is not an ex-
pensive device, it being estimated that they
| will not cost over $500 each. A six-horse
engine runs it heavily loaded, with COM
parative ease. This is not the first inven-
| ton Maxwell has made. He has produced
several valuable devices, in the way of
labor-saving wood-sawing machines, door
catches and splitting wedges, but the lates.
one overtops them all, and l believe for
tune is in store'fo him."
| Eddie Simpson, the mighty correspond
ent for Holbrook, Merrill & Stetson's estsb-
| lishment, is the latest victim Of practical
| jokerdom.
Two of his acquaintance were overheard
| by reporter on the cars the other day, dis
cussi1g the matter.
| Eddie, it appears, prides himself on his
| qualities as a gallant, and very properly,
| TOO, as the ladies will all admit A couple
of weeks ago two very nice young ladies Of
San Francisco paid visit to friends in this
city and remained until few days ago.
Eddie had become acquainted with them,
and rendered his services as chaperone dur
ing their stay. The young ladies, being ia
miiar with his abilities in this line, gladly
accepted.
Well, they attended all the tony balls,
parties and germans, and were frequently
at the theater. Eddie was in his glory, and
| the dudes in town were madder than hor-
nets. But an end comes to all good things,
and the fair visitors announced their inten-
ton one evening of going home the next
day. The gallant felt sad, of course, but
/ l.. 81. 49, Hov