Connecticut western news., 1890-09-03
THE MATTITUCK PLAN.

From the New York Weekly Tribune ofAug 27l
 An unbridled press has, during the last two or three weeks, contained many allusions to recent Presbyterian church fair at Mattituck, l.. I. The reader may or may not have seen accounts of it. To be on the safe side we will say that the feature of the fair which awakened gen. eral interest was what we will call the osculatory proceedings. A dozen of the best-looking of the Mattituck Presby- terian young ladies screened themselves off in one corner and allowed any Matti- tuck Presbyterian man, young or old, to kiss one of them once for 25 cents, ridiculously low figure we may remark in passing. The plan was a great suc- cess, and of the $2OO raised by the fair, $16O came from the kissing operations, leaving only $40 to be credited to the ice cream, lemonade, tidies, slippers, flowers, ish-pads, grab-bags, and so forth all of which speaks well for the taste and discretion of the men of Mat tituck. The occurrence becoming pub lie through the active agencies of the Associated Press, they have awakened much comment and not 8 little adverse criticism.
 It seems to us that this adverse criti- cism is unjust. The end justified the means, if they needed any justification. But what was the end ? Nothing less than the clothing of the natives of the Boolibool Islands, small Pacific Ocean group in 2 degrees north latitude. The unclothed condition of these islanders has long been notorious in Mattituck. Most of them4i* is known, have been partially converted to Christianity. but nothing more can be done without clothes. Besides, winter is coming on i'll the Boolibool Islands, and winter where the second degree of north lati- tude comes in the back door and goes out the front window of mans house Is something to be dreaded, so it is whispered in Mattituck. Yaggiyaggi, the head chief, needed fall overcoat. He is more nearly converted than many of the others, and it is advisable to culti. vate him. Each of his 125 wives needed bonnets, or some sort of head Lowering. His 487 children Census of 1889) need ed shoes and stockings. Old Yaggiyaggi is not so we'll able to provide for his family as he once was, having overwork- ed himself in June, while on little excursion to neighboring island, at the pleasurable task of cutting off the heads of: the other islanders previously knocked down by his own followers. The exertion brought on decline, and without winter overcoat and other clothing to match, another spring may see the largest collection of royal widows and orphans ever known in Boolibool. All of these facts, or at least a foundation for them, were conveyed to Mattituck by young man who for merly lived there, but is now laboring as missionary in the Boolibool Islands Of course, feminine interest was im- mediately aroused, especially when it was known that that horrid second de- gree of north latitude ran right through the islands. The poor natives must be clothed before winter if every man in NIattituck had to be held up and forci- ply kissed and his pockets picked of the fee, proceeding which, fortunately for the good name of Mattituck men, was found unnecessary.
 To-day there is $16O in the foreign mission fund which would not be there had it not been for the bright idea of the Mattituck girls to kiss the Matti- tuck men at 25 cents apiece. Besides. it is hinted that the girls rather enjoyed 1t themselves, and to find fault with the plan is absurd. Let them organize an other fair, advertise it in the New York papers and clothe all of the islanders from Alaska to the Antaxtic Circle.