The Anaconda standard., 1890-02-21
the "ARIzoNA KICKER"

several New Specimens OG Western kseh-
torsal Raserprtse.
From the Dctroit Free rress.
We extract the following frusn the last
issue Of the Arizona kickrr:
Ir Hit THE NAIL.-In our last issue We
called attention tn the fact that we had
started u representative of thc kickrr
around the world. That representative ~
Apache Jim, ~ full-blooslcsi Indian. He is
the first and only rGstlskin who has ever
started ont on such tour. and probably
the meanc.t and siirticst. He is not to
see how quick hc can make the trip' b''t
how long he can bc abO'it IL. We gave
him - to- lay in supply OF tobacco ana
whisky, and he will heat his way ON trains
and steamboats,.
Our offer of prize Of "a coyotc-sk,n
jacket to the person who gIcsses nearest
the time made by Jim has alrcnsiy brought
in I 10 gucsscs. ranging from i0i days to
laO years, aud our enterprise il the talk
of the whole West. We don't wonder that
our lol,-earcd contemporary down the
street il trying tai raise. money to buy n
box of rtuiglI-oIi-oltl-niossib The
only editorial enterprise hc has ever
shown in this town was in riding out two
miles tn meet a circus and , ..,ah,"f an IN IN.
ls.s.tetl was his father in disguise.
Ir's a GO.-Last night We forwarded
rais.. n " cavairy company here. to- b,
known as '.rhc Kicker LcRion," and To
he appointed colonel of the same. Ihcs'
swallowed like hot buckwhc;,t cake, and
that i'm less than two months the streets of
this town will echo the thunder OF ch;,rg-
ing ssi,padroiIs. We propose to donate the
weekly services of six mules. in case our
request il complied with, and VIC promise.
the boys i'm advance that we shall lead
then. or, Ia glory and death whenever IL is
convenient to do SO.
How arc you ''coIoner''--a real, live col
oilel with - commission i'm his pocket aili
"a bosom full of patriotism and glory! No
wonder th.. old shelllDlck down the street
sits and gazcs into vacancy ,, 10y the n"1r. h,.
secs the handwriting on the wall. No a'i-
vance will la made in our advertising
rates ON this account. All advertisements
Intended for the weeks issue must bc i'm
No let him howl. When tn. old cllattcl-
unortglgcd, bankruptcd, poverty stricken
concern down tho avenue, which claims
tn be "a ncwsrapcr, bought an old powcr
ns;;1, I'rr ~ nxc, t'..r,. hy /. mule
tcani.hc expected the American contincnt
tn tip mp at AN angle of 45 slcgr.cs. "He
was the first to display cnterpris.--it was
the first lpower-prcss i'm Inc would
show the people w hat real newspaper en-
tcrpris. was," and So forth ana :" ON.
That press, as everybody knows. has
proved "A Hat failure. except to kill OFT two
t,alf-brectis. who talked into its bowels
under the idea that II was "a photograph.
:lusl as for any improvements in ttie typo
graphical appearance or interest of our
contemporary il isn't there. Nothing hut
n drunken riot aud a case OF absolute ''pi
could sio that.
We havcnt hccu Growing around any,
but have been at work all tue same.
We now take pleasure iit announcing to
our readers that. beginning next week. wa
shall not only ink the forms OF the k"ke''
with regular glue ant molasscs roller
procured in Denver at great expense.
| and aS u particular favor. hut We shall
| place II jar of beans in o'ir window ana
| offer lUO years subscription to this paper
| to the person making the nearest guess
| as 10 the exact number. Three months
will hc allowed for sending i'm the Rtcsses.
L.ss
| the aforesaid cross-cyed. lame -joip ted.
! bick-kncsti. oiic-storis.i hycna who adds
the the word .cli,"r :. his namsi ',Si, viii iIar h.,
! prize of four gallons Of whisky to the
half breed who can wear shirt the
| longest, and take our whole Office force
| ,p In IA balloon az soon the vehicle, al
ready contracted for, can arrive here.
Now let our contemporary howl with
together. We hay. only just begun with
| him. tie talk of editorial enterprises: He
prr,c pn of GIx.nE ;nir ,"by snc%Sy Wnx % vi. can, @
| think of more schemes in live minutes
| than could bc crowded into his Uranium
| in 1000 years. We've been IA little saving
| of late, hut now that this so-callcd ''pub-
Usher" l,.ts seen III To blow his buglc horn
about enterprises well 60 down int" our
| him into u rabbit hole and plug ny the en-
trance.
| Clever Replies.
/, History has recorded that :, foreign Irin-
/ cess To whom Henry VIII. OF England
offered his hand in marriage, sent back the
| pointed answer that ''if she had two headr
she would have GLADLY placed one of them
| at his ma ajcsty'S disposal. This allusiot
l To- the fate of Anne IBolcyn and Katherine
! Howard was IA good specimen of the cpl
| gr;inhniatic suartucss of that period; but
| says David Kerr. AN equally credible per
/ forEancc has been furnished 10y our owl
/ age.
Just at the time. when vague reports
were beginning To creep abrsp:ad that Ger
/ many WAS ,uc,litutiu, fresh extension I,