Los Angeles herald., 1890-10-13
The Tall Reporter Once More
Opens His Mouth
And UnfOlds Tale of Linn
berger and Onions,
Connected with Spooks Near COun-
ty Jail.
A Conjunction of Eatables and Drinkables,
With an Ode to the Moon Thrown In,
Causes Him To Be Robbed of
All His Wealth.

vi Oaturuay ulgnC anu seemed wealth.
Ter than the week before. He was just
as generous and talkative as he had been
on the previous occasion, and insisted
upon treating all around before his last
positively his last appear
ance, and no theatrical humbug about
it. He said he had fixed it with the
boys on the road-four divisions at 81
apiece-up to Frisco, and first-class
travelling all the time. He was made
an honorary member of the club, with
power to institute subordinate lodges
wherever he went, as long as his money
held out. Cooking one Of his stemwind-
ing legs over the other, the young man
who had been a soldier and cowboy,
but whose ambition was to be news
paper man, said that he was proud of
the honor done him. He reverted to
his three weeks experience as reporter,
and offered one more Renaissance of his
eventful career on the Tuscon Nebula.
''Boys," said he, "they say that re-
porters are prevaricators of the truth, or
to put it more mildly, liars, but you and
know that such is not the fact. Truth
is stranger than fiction, l have read
somewhere, although 1 don't recollect
whether the quotation is from cloth
ing store card or from Shakespeare. 1t
doesn't matter much but it is plain,
solid fact. Now if tell you that have
seen people rise out of the ground, the
same as they do on the stage in the
opera of Robert lie Diable, when his nibs
Of the internal regions sings in bass
tones, "Vous qui dormez sous cette
froide pierre, etc., EXCUSE my voice,
have eaten chile colorado-you will
probably not believe me. But l shall
soon convince you. Two days before l
left the cosmopolitan paper in
the land of the ella monster, had
worked very late. 1t was near 3 O'Clock
in the morning when went home.
My work had consisted, principally, in
playing faro and correcting the gram
NAUTICAL errors in the bosses editorials.
Also drinking whisky punches with pol
iticians, and letting them pay for them.
While l was vending my way home, try
ing to overcome the baneful effects of
Limberger cheese, onions and pumper-
nickel, meandered near the county
Jail and leaned against the wall of that
charitable institution. Why l should
have felt poetical under combination
of such sweet smelling products of agri-
culture and German industry, know
not; may be it was the beer. but that 1
doubt. was looking at the moon, and
threw off a four-line verse on that dead
satellite in less time than you could say
Peter Piper picked a peck of peanuts
peppers and pecans. 1t was so neat
that fell down and my legs Vent into a
hole. 1 pulled myself together again,
when, to my horror, head came out OF
the hole. "Vade retro, Satanas," MUIR
I~..L A ~o1x al
lowed the head, then legs, and finally
be drunk, but there could
be no other conclusion drawn, unless
was willing to give in that the appear
ance was supernatural. l have always
maintained that there are no spooks,
and that a good live corpse is much
more to be feared than dead one. And
here was now, either having to con-
TESS that was common ordinary plain
drunk, whom policeman ought to have
run in, or else that was in the pres
ence of the specter of some hanged GRIM
inal. know my eyes bulged, and they
bulged some more as l saw thirteen
more spooks climb up solemnly, one af-
ter the other. out of the pit. They
stood around me, freezing the marrow
in my bones with their uncanny looks,
and was holding on to the adobe soil
with my trembling hands, unable to
move. The silence was broken by one
of those horrid phantoms: Say, Gully,
what yer got in yer clothes? How much
Doodle have yer about yer? Show up
yer stuff, er I'll hit yer bat, see?" l
moved not; but they did. They stood
me on my head, took $l4 in cash and my
revolver. One of the spooks, before they
1oft hoe fspo hot of in, fo
stead dilapidated old sombrero, which
/ am sure had seen more years than l..
Silently they slid away, and l was so
frightened that fell into the hole N.Y.
self, on lot of chains, which hurt
me sorely where it matters least. l
climbed out of there as quick as / could
and made for home, spirit-broken and
wilted wretch. The next day when
came on the street with fearful head
on me-you see Limberger will affect a
man-everybody asked me for particulars
regarding the escape of the prisoners in
I the county jail. l knew nothing and
went to investigate. Then l learned
that they had tunneled under the walls
and dug out of the ground just as was
making myself agreeable to Fair Moon
and so FORTH" II l had not been so
emotional 1 would have had enough
sabe to run away, but what are you
going to do when the spirit moveth? So
I lost my fourteen dollars and my gun I;
likewise did have to have my head
shampooed to remove disagreeable COM
pany that had dropped from the disrep-
utable sombrero onto my hair. told
the story in confidence to one whom l
thought could trust, and, Of course,
that evening everybody knew it and was
making fun Of me. OH was so tired
that night that forgot to correct an
editorial of my boss entitled: "Of the
influence of cacti upon the rainfall in
prehistoric Arizona" and it came out
s'Of the indulgence of cats upon the cod
fish balls of Arizona" told you last
week that was fired-well, boys, thai
was the reason. The deacon was so mac
at me that he swore, and his wife would
not forgive him until had the bounce;
As your walking delegate, gentlemen,
now invite you to nominate your poison
We meet no more Adieu."