The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-06-12
BRIGHT BITS.
HAVE you husband?" asked the census man
OF the lady from DER the Rhine;
She softly shook her f1axen head
And sweetly answered "Nein. "

= HAVE you husband" asked the census man
OF the lady from Ter the Rhine;
She softly shook her tiaxen head,
And sweetly answered 'Nein."
Baltimore Herald.
A SMILE of modification is frequently sort
of chagrin.-Ne1o York Commercial
WHEN man has done a foolish thing he al
ways looks around quickly to see if anybody
saw him; when woman does-but whoever
knew woman to do foolish thing. -Soner-
Uiile Journal.
NEW NURSE Ginging)-Rock a by baby on
Precious Child starting up)-Don't sing that
old chestnut, or l shall never go to sleep; sing
something new.-Boston BUDGET.
THERE is one thing Idont understand about
crab"
why, whenever a crab wants to see anything
he puts his eye out Harpers Bdzar.
You never saw such dog as my Nerol The
other day friend borrowed him to go shooting
with He didn't have any luck, and when they
came back Nero actually dragged him to the
stand of game dealer.-FJtegende Bldtter.
Two WIVES were chatting in London market
II think I'm frightfully economical" said one.
There wasn't day last week that l didn't
haunt the bargain counters. picking up things
that will come handy. - Philadelphia Record
PASS me the rolls, - said the professor.
They are all gone, said the landlady. you
were late for breakfast and they were eaten
What time do you call the roll? l shall en-
deavor to be present hereafter. "-NeD YORK
Herald
You've Simmer tpatronizingly)-You never
enjoyed the advantages of collegiate educa-
ton, did you. Uncle?
Uncle Bill-No; but I was in two or three
draft riots endurin' the war.-Terre Haute
Express.
ICE is too expensive, Mary. You must get
along without it. -
But how am | to keep the beef fresh and the
butter and milk cool?'
You have fan. haven't you?'-Ne,c Orleans
Times Democrat.
NEtLIE-Uncle Jack, who was that lady all in
black, with the queer white hat, whom we saw
Uncle Jack-That was a Sister of Charity,
dear.
Nellie (after a pause)-Uncle Jack, was it
Hope or Faith?-I'he Jester.
HERE is a sample of the honor paid to birth"
in Berlin: A well-dresSed lady enters a shop
The clerk says: Does the countess want silk?''
NO." (She is passed on to another clerk
Does the lady want woolen?" No" Third
clerk (to r-strapper)-Please wait on the
woman-She wants cotton.-BerLin Letter.
Ep1roR-Mr. Palmerhouse. what do Won mean
by this sentence: "Future ages will certainly
applaud the act with both hands and feet
while the present age fiops its ears in vain
endeavor to sweep the cobwebs of doubt from
Editorial writer Cblushing) I must have thought
sir, that was still on a Chicago newspaper
Judge.
PUTS ANOTHER FACE On IT.-"So you married
Miss Hicks?"
Yes"
well congratulate you; though I should
hate to have Alice Hicks for a sister-in-law.'
Il haven't"
''How's that?"
"Alce is the Miss Hicks married. "-Ne,o
York Sun
CENSUS ENUNERAToR Ito head of the house,
Are you married or unmarried, sir?
Head of the House-Married.
Enumeration "a little later)-Have you wifes
Head (astonished)--Yes.
Enumerator-Er-maleo or female?
Head NOW thoroughly aroused)-That, SIR is
one of the questions am not going to answer
LolUeH Citizen.