Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1890-11-15
Written for TIE EVENING srAR
A MAN AS HOUSEKEEPER.
His Opinion OF Himself and the Opin-
ions Of Others OF Him.

HIS opinion OF Himself and the Opin.
ions Of Others Of Him.
HIS ANOMALOUS POSITION UNDER HIS OWN ROOF
WHAT SOME MEN ARE GOOD FoR-THx CASE OF
JOHN MISUNDERSTANDING WITH THE SER
vANTs-THE NEWLY MARRIED couPLR.
| lM ANS position in a family, while anom-
ilWk alous from one point of view and appar-
Yently paradoxical from another. is
SNS6V nevertheless one Of considerable i'm
portance-unless he himself ordains it shall
be otherwise-and as factor of success is, as
rule, indispensable. If good for nothing else,
as many are, he is serviceable in prohibitory
sense against the invasion Of tramps or for
ayers with burglarious intent pretty much as
stuffed scarecrow lends deception to the vision
| Of predatory birds with Weaknesses for barn
yards and chicken roosts. 1t is as the man of
the house, head of the family indoors, that his
position is anomalous. He is, or rather, is al
lowed by the shrewd partner Of his fortunes,
his feelings and his fame to suppose he is the
source from which all power and authority
emanate, while it is almost certainly the case
| that he holds the mastership of domain simply
on sufferance-that he is wheedled without his
knowing or suspecting it into having done ex-
conceived and wanted done.
HOW MEN TALK OF HOUSEKEEPING.
To hear most men talk Of housekeeping and
domestic affairs one would imagine they knew
it all and that it is mere childs play instead of
one Of the great arts of life. Now, the perfect
housekeeper--never of the masculine gender
has state to gOvern-her laws are born of
just necessities momentous to her work as
those OF political economy to government and
as essential to success She is in fact a queen
In her domain and her authority should extend
to the uttermost parts thereof. II she is merely
secretary OF state, prime minister to her hus-
band, who can know but little of the exigencies
OF household affairs and merely guesses at the
superficial methods by which he conducts them
there can be no housekeeping at all worthy the
name; 1t is merely getting along, and that's all.
Those men who feel called upon to assume the
duties belonging to their wives-includlng the
management OF servants-generally succeed
in making pretty mess of it, and getting their
home matters into entanglements they are
totally unable to extricate themselves from and
then blame it all on the women folk. 1t is a
curious fact that such men are almost invari-
ably small in stature with thin piping voice,
fierce in countenance and cyclonic in the ex-
hibition of authority.
DIFFERENCE WITHOUT DISTINCTION.
This class Of athletic patresfamilia are but Of
kind with others who underestimate the vol
ume OF housekeepers work and overestimate
their own understanding Of the principles in
volved. They generally think it very strange
that little as there is to be done there should
be such a fuss about doing it.; that if they had
it to do it would all be done up brown by noon
every day-and all that sort of thing. They
are counterparts of John Grumlie, he Of whom
we read in an old Scotch ballad:
"John Grumlie swore by the light O. the moon.
That he could do more work in a day,
Than his wife could do i'll three"
So Mrs. Grumlie, as the ballad goes, caught
the bull by the horns, SO to speak, and exchanged
places one day with cannie John. leaving him
while she went to the field with the pillow to
the tweer" she had spun the day before to
turn the malt lest the beer should spoil and to
watch the hens for fear they should lay away
These four simple things, as it was he, were all
she would ask. Well, he did dress the children,
and it is not hard to guess how they looked
when he got through with them, but he forgot
the malt and the beer was lost, which grieved
his innermost soul. lie endeavored to sing
aloud merriy as he reeled the tweel but
never once thought of the hens until his
wife came in at nightfall, and what sorry
pickle Mr.. John found himself in. No wonder
that in fever Of vexation and repentance he
wanted to resign his house wifery, but the
sharp old lady pretended to be satisfied with
and willing to stick to her bargain. OF course
she felt like humping him over the head, but
she didn't; she let him off with just enough
grace to keep his spirit of self-adulaton barely
above the freezing point. There are q great
lot Of John Grumlies in the world now who
might have followed to good effect the counsel
OF the wise old man who advised his son:
when thou art counting, my lad, keep thine
eyes wide open, when thou art married keep
them half shut
MEDDLINa WITH THE SERVANTS.
The meddlesome man about the household
especially with the hired helps not SO scarce
as to be a curiosity, but on the contrary, is a
very numerous individual. When any ill-feel-
ing happens to exist between mistress and
maid he is just the fellow to sit BY and quietly
enjoy state of affairs he claims would not
have been possible under his personal admin
istration, though there has possibly never
been an instance when the man OF the house
has had the control of hired women where they
situation or rebelled openly against his direc-
tons. How could 1t be different? What does
man, who is supposed to have all outdoor vo-
cation to follow and absorb his time, know of
the thousand and one small, but, at the same
time, important household duties that must be
looked after. No more than a housekeeper is
expected to be conversant with the way in
which lawyer tries his case or physician
prescribes for his patient. The worst of all
drawbacks to housekeeping is the man who is
continually finding fault with the servants and
endeavoring to force the execution of his ideas
upon the better judgment of his wife or the
housekeeper. There is probably only one time
OF his existence when
A MAN HAS PRECEDENCE AS A HoUsEKEEPER,
and that is when the housekeeping of a newly
married couple is in a chrysalis state and has
not sufficiently advanced to wear away the
novelty of the thing. While this novelty lasts
the recently made benedict is the center
around which all things revolve. His COM
forts, his likes, his preference in eating. his
ideas about the servants and every whimsical
notion are consulted until he is in fair way
to be spoiled-and perhaps that lies at the bot
tom Of much of the trouble with him in after
life. The length Of time all this lasts. how
ever, varies, but it may safely be predicted
that those exceptional households in which
there is not after awhile dimunition OF his
ardor and final Encouragement of household
duties and a general RELOCATION of their man.
agement to her to whom it rightfully belongs.
The Triumph of Right.
~, q