davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24
His Qualifications.

Alexander II. Stephens, the Georgia
statesman and historian, was distin-
guished for many unique traits OF
character. He was man whose
brain was too powerful for his body,
and its active forces kept his body
weak and fraiI. He never weighed
over eighty-fve pounds, and had
to be wheeled to his place in the
House of Congress in an invalid's
chair. He was, among his many other
superlative qualities, a rough customer
to run against in debate, and his quick
wit and keen sarcasm struck terror to
all members who opposed him.
A new member from Maine opposed
the diminutive Georgian one day, and,
with that confidence in himself usual
to the new member who is fresh from
some place where he has been consid-
cred the lion of his tribe, he under
took to annihilate Mr.. Stephens. An
gered by the GOODNESS and native pO-
likeness of the SOutherner, the Maine
man became angry, and reflected on
Mr.. Stephens smallness, intimating
that the gentleman was small of brain
and of character. Every old member
became interested, knowing that there
would be some fun. And there was.
into the aisle, and in that loud, piping
voice which always drew the attention
of the House and gallery, he ex-
claimed:
"Mr. Speaker, the gentleman from
Maine says that I am so small of body,
brain and character that he could
swallow me whole. I simply wish to
say, sir, that for the good of himself
and his constituents it would be well
if he were to do so. He would then
have more brains and morals in his
stomach than he ever had in his head
and soul"
This settled that member. Another
new member from the then new State
of Kansas crossed swords with him one
day, and said that Mr.. Stephens
should be on a farm. Mr.. Stephens
never began a personal debate, but he
never let another make him q personal
target without teaching him a lesson
never to be forgotten. So he had his
chair wheeled into the aisle, and his
piping voice caused all to listen while
he exclaimed:
81 would like to remark that I do not
think the gentleman from Kansas is fit
to feed sWill to swine, and should not
be on a farm, but at a school of high
morals and manners.
The Kansas man felt insu1ted, and
demanded the words taken down on a
question of personal privilege. Mr..
Stephens replied:
"Mr. Speaker, I viii make that IN
necessary by apologizing for the Ian
guage if it be unparliameutary. I VIII
withdraw the remark, and say that I
think the gentleman is eminentIy and
superIativeIy qualified for feeding swiII
to swine-but I know of no other
qualification he possesses. 20 bicago
Ledger.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

which the water comes tumbling only q
few inches in depth. The spsarsrs have
q lantern strapped on the crown Of their
head by an arrangement Of wire. and a
basket strapped at their backs This
basket has 8 top shaped like our eel pots
with q hole through which the fish can be
dropped, but can not crawl out again. He
takes his station at the foot Of the dam or
where the light from his lantern falls on
the water above. The lampreys at night
hold on to the stones with their mouths
like our suckers, and when they see the
light they let 60 their hold and drift
laziIy, tail first. to the dam and over it,
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

every night with the torches Of fishermen
In quest of the silver eel OF the pickerel.
Fish spears have long been laid away, for
spearing fish during the spawning season
is crime that should call down all the
thunders Of the piscatorial Jove. Yet,
such fish sIayers do exist.
Visitors along the bays Of our coast and
inland streams may now see, when they
are walking abroad in the calm evenings,
light-lize enlarged will-O'-the-Wisps float
ing from poiut to point among the shall
lows. They investigate them, to find the
mystery resolve itself into boat with two
men, one to pole the boat and one to
spear the fish. The light proceeds from
an upright about three feet high, from
which projects an arm of about the same
length, the end Of which is loosely
wrapped around with tow or cotton
waste. On the top of the upright is q
two-quart can fitted with a faucet and
holding kerosene, which flows fast or slow
as desired. along the arm, which is hollow,
and saturates the bundle of tow, and THIS
being lighted attracts the fish and shows
them plainly to the spearer.
In the old days an open-Work cresset Of
iron was filed with dry pine-knots, which
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

The story goes that when Captain
Cook discovered Australia he saw some
Of the natives on the shore with a dead
animal of some sort in their possession,
and sent sailors in a little boat to buy
it Of them. When it came on board he
saw it was something quite new, so he
sent the sailors back to inquire its
name. The sailors asked, but not being
able to make the natives understand,
received the answer, "I don't know, 3"
or in the Australian language, Exam
ga-roo." The sailors supposed this
was the name of the animal, and so re
ported it. Thus the name of the curl
Gus animal is the "I-dont-know."
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

the boys collected from the woods. The
fault Of this was that it could only be
used in the bow of the boat. and SO as to
cast the strongest light in an awkward
place. The dense smoke also came
straight back over the boat, much to the
discontinue of the sportsmen. Then the
lamp with a reflector was tried. This was
dark at the back and was fixed on a pivot
allowing to be thrown from side to side,
but even with this the strongest light fell
too far ahead, so the upright and arm
came in use, and is more generally used
than any other.
The duties of the man with the pole
are not easy, and but few people can pole
a boat to suit an old spearer. He must
not strike the bottom hard with his pole,
for sound is much increased under water,
and the mere conclusion of the pole on
rock bottom will scare fish twenty yards
away. Then he must pole the boat just
so, neither too fast nor too slow, and in
direction to keep the smoke from crossing
the boat When a fish is struck the boat
must be staid and held still, or a sudden
lifting of the spear will enable the fish to
get away. In using the spear consider
able skill is required, as will soon be found
OuU by the repeated misses scored at first
trying.
One must ale " for 7fraction in max
ing a strike. A perfectly straight stick
held upright in a depth Of three feet Of
water will appear to be bent at an angle
of 20 degrees, and this angle will decrease
when the water becomes shallow, and in
crease as it deepens. Consequently the first
thing to learn is to judge the depth at which
the fish lies; at the depth of three feet
strike fully foot behind him if he is COM
ing toward you, and trihe more if going
from you. The best way is to try first at
fish going against the stream as in strik-
ing with the current the slightest thing
varies tha accuracy and nothing mere so
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24
GERMAN JOKES.
OITITE APPROPRIATE.

\
GOverness-M Emma, have YOU
found in SchiIler's works an appropri-
ate poem to recite at the silver we'd
ming of your parents.
Miss Emma-Yes, I have found an
appropriate poem. 1t is entitled "The
Fight with the Dragon"
SHE WAS UP TO HIM.
He-My dearest, darlingest little
She-You needn't employ any of that
sort of taffy, for you won't get the latch
key, no matter what you say.
MUSICAL ITEM.
A.-SO your dog has run away again,
has he?
B.-Yes; since my daughter has been
taking singing lessons there is no such
thing as keeping him on the premises.
HE LIVED HIGH.
VisitOr-HOW did you come to rent
room the stairs to which are so steep
and dangerous?
Poet had an object in view. You
should see how polite the bill collectors
are when they get up here and I hint
about kicking them down stairs.
AN EYE TO THE FUTURE.
Father-Why do you ask for the
hand Of my younger daughter instead
Of that of her elder sister?
Because [ think the elder
sister would more satisfactorily fill the
position of aunt to my future children.
A DEAD GIvE-AwAY,
InquisiYe ncighbOr-YO mas hair
is as black as if she dyed it. Does she
really dye it, Tommy?
TOmmy-O, no. she don't dye 1t.
That's the color it was when she
bought it.
NOT AN ELIGIBLE BOARDER,
LandIady's daughter Mother, you
tell that man in the front room to clear
out at the end Of the month.
Landlady-Why so, my daughter?
He Is a very nice gentleman.
Landlady's daughter-Hei is a fraud.
I've been through his trunk, and found
lots of letters from a woman to whom
he is engaged to be married. What
sense IS there in wasting the nice
front room to that sort Of a bOarder
We want one who isn't engaged.
MEDICAL ITEMS.
A-Dr. Jones is a good-hearted
man.
BIN what way?
Avery often he don't take a cent
from his patients.
30! I see. The executor Of the
patients estate is called to paw 1t.
FEW PASSING REMARKS.
Jones-What did your wife say when
you got home last night?
Smlth-WhRt did she say? My dear
fellow, 1t would take me three hours to
tell you half Of what she said.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

time is perfect. Some Of their dances
are a revelation. The "fu-su, or fight
ing dance, is illustrative of their fstic
skill. The Samoans are accomplished
boxers, and in this dance assume al
most the same attitudes seen in the
prize ring. Ages ago they discovered
the knockout" blow, which they de-
liver with precision and power. The
"tOllOla," or presentation dance, used
when the village takes offerings to the
chief, is rich in meIOdiOus singing, and
the "satke, or stick dance, is a marvel
of precision. In this dance, whether
there be a dozen natives or 800, every
alternate one has either two short
sticks or one long one. Time is kept
by beating the long sticks with the
short one. In the "siva, or war dance,
they sit in a row like a lot of tailOrs
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

VERY few persons can truthfully say
that their destiny has been decided by
the drawing of straw. Edward Span
genburg, one of the most successful of
the younger attorneys of Cincinnati,
owes much of the good things that
have come to him to such an apparent
ly trivial circumstance. The time was
just at the close of the war. Mr.. Span
genburg and his brother had done serv-
ice under the stars and stripes, and
with their father found themselves in
Denver, then a small place. A good
opening was found for one of the boys,
but which was to stay there was a
question. Neither had a profession.
So the good father prepared two straws
and, covering them in his fingers, babe
each son to pull one. Young Edward
drew the short one and was obliged TO
return to Cincinnati. He left the West
with heavy heart, arrived in Cincin-
natl, procured employment without
trouble, gained the fancy of the late
W. T. Forrest, began to study law,
and in few years has, by diligent
work and honest methods, buiIded a
practice that many an older attorney
would be proud to possess. Mr.. Span
genberg says the short end of the straw
turned after all to be the long end.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

A CURIOUS accident which happened
recently in Paris points out a possible
danger in the wearing of combs and
bracelets of celIuloid. A little girl sat
down before the fire to prepare her
lessons. Her hair was kept back by a
semi-circIe comb of celIuIoid. AS her
head was bent forward to the fire this
became warm, and suddenly burst into
flames. The child's hair was partly
burned off, and the skin of the head
was so injured that several months af-
ter, though the burn was healed, the
cicatrix formed white patch on which
no hair would grow. The burning
point of celluloid is about one hundred
and eighty degrees, and the comb worn
by the girl had attained that heat as
it was held before the fire.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

as they slip down the incline they hang to
the hrst projection. and quick as a fash
the spear strikes them and they are trans
ferred to the basket
Visitors crossing the bridges see these
lights scattered over the river, blending
with the lights on shore, rendering it diff
cult to define the houses and the river;
they think it the lamp of some vessel lying
at anchor or at a wharf, and go home to
bed never dreaming of the strange indus
try going on just under their noses.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24
and go tlrough . gerieg Of extraordi-

and go through a series of extraordi-
nary caisthenics.
Some of the Samoans have fery-red
hair. Their hair is naturally long and
wavy, but devoid of kinks. BY bleach
ing it with lime, they obtain the brill
liant red they all admire. They are all
"doublejointed, " and they are able to,
and naturally do, move their arms,
fingers, and limbs into positions no
white can initiate. In color the Samo-
ans are a fair duplicate of the muIatto.
but there is a sub-tint to their skin
which frees it of any muddy" effect. 3"
The men are all tattOOed from the
waist to the knees. This tattoo con-
sists of a solid background of blue.
enlivened with a smaller design in terra
Gotta In that sunny land the bows
mature at 10, but they are not men
until they are tattOoed. The operation
requires weeks for its completion. and
is the one great expense in their lives.
The girls are married at from IL to Is.
an unmarried one of is being consid-
cred an old maid.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

Memphis CTenn.) Appeal, December ..
Upon the principle that none but eagles
soar with eagles, the Appeal reportoriaI cap
italist yesterday sought out Mr.. Chas. E.
WOOdsOn, the extent of whose good fortune
is only excelled by his handsome appear
anCe. Mr.. WOOdsOn was the lucky holder of
One-foItiebh part of ticket No. SO, 455 in the
December drawing of the louisiana State
Lottery which drew the capital prize of
100000. The Appeal commissioner found
Mr.. WOOdsOn hard at work at MS desk,
in the Office of the welI-known retail dry
goods establishment of Hunter Broth ers,
corner of Main and West Court streets. The
Appeal reporter approached him with the
hgUrRtlve question: ''Weu, Mr.. WOo1son,
suppose your ship has come imp How IS
that, sir?" said he, and then, as if catching
on to the ide7, continued; ooh, yes, sir; 1
made the rifle the last drawing" In reply
to further interrOgatOries Mr.. WOOdsOn
elaborated, 81 he the lucky number, de-
posted 1t with my bank, received the re-
turns ($15,0OO) promptly, and have not yet
decided what Investment I will make.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

Australia pass the Islands but do not
stop. They @sIOw up" enough for the
transfer of mil for officials or mission
aries to a small boat and continue on
their course. There is practically no
trade with the islands, and merchant
men rarely visit them.
The missionaries in the Samoan Isl
ands are not permitted to teach the
natives the English language. There
are schools in which the people are
taught, but they are conducted in the
Samoan tongue, a impid language
which has been called "The italian of
the Pacific"
When the Samoans are not dancing
they are swimming, and when not in
the water they are dancing. The
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

ing southwest, west, or northwest
winds, which drive the rains almost at
right angles against the bank sloping
from the east, and wash away the soil
in much greater quantity than from
the western bank. Some of the river
valleys Of Prussia and Bavaria exhibit
similar phenomena.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

A FEW weeks ago two Pittsburgh
surgeons performed an operation on
the side Of woman by removing a
tumor. Since then the woman suffered
excruciating pain. The other day an
other surgeon was called in, and on
examination found a small pair of
foreeps used lby the former physicians
in the wOman's side.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

ALECK SMITH, of Bull Greek, near
JeffersOnville, Ind, is probably the
only farmer in the Union, perhaps in
world, who devotes all his time and
territory to the raisingof butter beans.
He owns a small place and has on this
for years grown the butter bean,
realizing comfortable living there
from.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

HE Samoa or Navi-
gators Islands are
Situated some four
thousand miles in q
soUthwesterly direc-
ton from San Fran
cisco. The regular
monthly steamers
that ply between
San Francisco and
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

THE bed which the German Emperor
and Empress occupied during their
visit to the Sultan was of solid silver,
with Oriental curtains of surprising
richness, heavily embroidered with
gold.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

THREE years ago seven working girls,
who moved in the same set, resolved
never TO marry. Now they are pro
vided with husbands except one, and
-her. engagement is announced.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

THE first sawmakers' anvil used In
this country is in the possession of E.
Andrews, of WilIiamspOrt, whose uncle
imported it from England in 1919.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

GERMAN papers assert that both ex-
Empress Frederick and her sister,
Princess Alice, regularly reported to
their mother, Queen Victoria, the
secrets of Germany's diplomatic and
military operations during 1870.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

THE late EnaiIe Angler left the fol-
lowing complete account Of his life /:
<'I was born in 1926, and since then
nothing extraordinary has happened
To me- %
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

A MISTAKE of one word recent
1y cost S. o. Fisher, Of West Bay
City, the price of fifty bushels Of pOta-
toes. He told his clerk to write to a
. Graying man for twenty-five or thirty
bushels, and the clerk wrote for bar
rels
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24
THE SPEARING OF FISH
METHODS OF PURSUING THIS PIsCA
TORLAL SPORT.

The Kerosene Torch Has Superseded the
OId-EasIiiOned Pine Knots and Wire
Rack Habits of Different Kinds Of Fish
paIing Them.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

TIE Royal Humane Society has late
y presented awards to four ladies for
saving life.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

HE SPEAR WAS
at one time regarded
as an honorable and
effective Implement
Of war, but now it is
only used by bar
bariaus and sport is
men. Our inland
rivers and coast
creeks are lit up
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24
THE SAMOAN ISLANDS.
FACTS CONCERNING A VERY PECuE.-
lar PEOPLE

The Inhabitants OF the Navigator Islands
In Peace ana FVar-The Mon Are AN
Tatt0oed-lEaIos Mature at Fifteen and
Girls g. Eleven Years Of Age.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

Perfection Is attained in DR.. Sage's Ca
tarrh Remedy. Tt cures the worst eases.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

No one ever complains TO me of having bad
Cold or Cough but what recommend Aliens
Lung Bslsam to them. So much has It done for
me. 1t is q true friend 10 all sufferers Of the
throat and lungs Mrs. z. COTSHELL, Jack
son. Michl
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

A Vocat;on.-Baykir: $50 you're going
TO Philadelphia? What on earth can yoU
do In that sleepy Old town2'
EaykiF; do the people,
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

IT is doubtful if there are many
families in the country that can show
an army record equal to the family of
Gersham Davis, of the town of WeIles,
near TOwanda, Pa. Davis and his
eight sons enlisted in the Union army
early in the war. The father and four
of the sons served until the war was
over and returned home. The -four
other sons We're killed in battle.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

AN English scientist says that if we
were to visit the moon we should find
the days and nights fortnight in
length, and if we Survived the scorch-
ing during the day, we should certain
~ be frozen to death during the ensu-
ing night
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

If a visitor must look on a do0r-mat for
Welcome his name is mud.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

wonder is how
they find time for
work. AuOf their
dances are &C
eompanied by
songs, and every.
on S pic s
event is com
memOrated with
a song and a
d a nee. Their
singing is entire.
ly different from
t h Q discordant
yells of most
savag es. The
basso, baritone,
and air are car
ried with pre-
cisiOn. and the
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

RUSSIA, although in many respects a
semi barbarOus nation, is making
steady progress in civilization. The
announcement is made that the infic-
ton of corporal punishment on peas
ants is to be abolished in the Baltic
provinces. It has been the custom to
employ the lash for petty offenses or
. as means Of extracting rent OF taxes.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

No matter how small a man may be, the
woman who marries him loves him Just as
much as if he was six feet two.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

THE Norwegians are said to be the
longest lived people in the world.
Official statistics show that the aver
age duration of life in Norway is 48. 80
for the men, 80 for the women, and
49.77 for both sexes. The duration of
life has increased of late years.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

LaGrippe ought to be popular in secret
society lodges, If any where.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24
So PerforEns = d..

A mince pie may be sans rIme' but Sc
shall never be sans Faisiu.'
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

The fashionable bud is modest; she never
wants to blow.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

New ideas come with the progress of tima.
Every year bring, some new wrinkle.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

LARGE deposits of ice, believed by
some to be relics of the glacial period
in this country, have been discovered
in Idaho. They are imbedded in earth
and overgrown with moss, which has
prevented them from wasting away. It
is seriously proposed to form com
Panies to mine this ice for sale in
Western cities, where ice is always
dear and scarce.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

McGinty ought to be happy. He WON'T
catch the influenza at the bottom Of the sea.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

Cup to Date" The title of Lord Teny-
sons new poem, ''Demeber'' was, of course
suggested by the gas strike.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

Life-insurance agents can make life
burden.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

The cOnceit of some people is so strong
that they admire their mistakes because
they make them.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1890-01-24

IT has been observed that many of
the rivers of Saxony which flow through
loose or soft materials have a steep
bank on the east, northeast, or south
east, while the opposite shore is fat
Herr Rucktaschel, who has been study
ing the subject, attributes this one
sidedness to the action Of the prevail.