Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1890-09-28
MUSIC In OUR ALLEY.
The Two Annies Forever on the Air
in the Gladstone Retreat.
A BAND THAT is PRIVILEGED.
Notes That Called Up Visions Of Beauty
Only to DissppOint.
THE PRAISES OF SIR PAT M'NALLI


Shee-e-e's my A-a-annis
I'm her-r-r Jo-o-oI
Na-ow we'll ma-a-arrv
Nayver-r-r to-oo par-rt:
Little Annie Rooney-she is
My swee-ee-thearrrt-"
The above is an attempt to render on pa
per the singing of a popular refrain by Miss
Maude Muldoon, of Our Alley. Miss Null
doom is one of the Alley musicians. She
has rival in the Cast Iron and Kaiser Will
helm Brass Band, whose headquarters are q
few doors below. and another in the solitary
concertina player, who resides on the first
floor front in the house across the way.
But Miss Muldoon, when she gets fair
chance, can beat either or both OF her COM
petitors. Give her ten minutes practice on
her mothers first-hoor lady bosrder's un-
tuned piano, and she will silence any Teu-
tonic trombone that ever roared. The first
floor ooarder, however, does not wish Miss
Maude to use her darling instrument" for
practicing purposes; and it is only when
the owner of the piano is out that the fair
girl dares to tinkle its keys. The first-hoor
boarder's husband was music teacher, and
he bequeathed his sole (undisputed) piece
of property-the piano-to his beloved wife.
She cannot play note, but she keeps the
instrument, partly in remembrance of Sig
nor Muldunio, and mainly because she can
never find any dealer enterprising enough
to purchase it.
SHE HAS TWO TUNES.
She objects to Maude's style OF perform
ance, but when her back is turned Maude
has splendid tune, and the aged piano
very bad quarter of an hour. Maude in
dulges in two tunes, and only two. They
are annie Laurie" and "Annie Rooney"
She tries both with perfect impsrtiality,
and has often been heard to sing the former
to music OF the latter, or to warble the latter
to the formers delightful strains. The
philosopher growIinely explains that the
reason for this extraordinary exchange is the
fear of Miss Muldoon that if she lays all her
musical powers at the feet Of one Annie. the
other Annie will grow jealous after the old
time fashion of femininity.
So ANNE of Maxwellton and Annie of
the Bowery cannot complain of unfair
treatment at the hands or lips of Miss
Maude Muldoon. Maude's rendition of
"Annie Laurie" without a piano, for she
sometimes spares US the additional infction
of that wretehed Instruments "rum-tum-
tum" ling, is superb. When she is washing
in the back kitchen, il runs like this:
Like doc on the gowing lyin' splash
-thump-splash-'is the fall of her fairy
feet" dump, bump, as the fairy's ele-
phantine pedal extremIties kiss the floor;
"and like winds in summer si-highing, her
voice is low and swe-eet"-(which, II must
be observed, the singers is not); "her
voice is low and swe-eet, and she's all the
wor-reld to me-e''-(splash, splash, bang)-
'and for little Annie Rooney wad lay me
down an dee-will you lave 60 o. that
basket, ,iye little divil, or I'll warm your ear
for yez." This to her small brother.
Michael.
A MAZE OF MELODY.
The Cast Iron and Kaiser Wilhelm band
of our alley is a great institution. To hear
it in the calm summer time. when darkness
has overshadowed the land, or when Nthe
fragrant odors of the alleys fauna and fora
permeate the atmosphere, to hear it at such
period is to remain awake all night. It is
impossible to sleep and give all ones soul
to rapture when the band plays die Wacht
Am Rhein" or "Vaterland"
"Music hath charms to soothe" as we all
know, and also "to soften;" but alack, it en-
tirely fails to soothe the sleepless poet, or TO
soften the strident blasphemy OF our friend,
the philosopher. The alley has complIined
over and over again OF the G. l. and Z. W.
Band; but the landlord gets good pay from
the bsndsmen, 50 he refuses all petitions for
their eviction. 81 like to patronize the arts
an Sciences" he says, $50 I'll let all them
play all the music they want. See?''
As for the coneertina player, he is harm
less. No one objects to him but the philoso-
pher, who objects to everything on princi-
pie. When he first came we all felt that he
must have a terrible load upon his heart.
The airs he played were filled with such de-
=. IL aba1-r
ing, that every maiden in the alley knew at
once that he must be at least broken
hearted corsair or expatriated ChiIde harold
in disguise Even the philosopher was at
first touched. "Poor thing" he growled,
the plays as if he hadn't had square meal
for months"
NOT EXACTLY CHILDE HAROLD.
But one day we saw the concertina player.
He was four feet one inch in height and
very nearly three feet in width. Under his
arm ne carried a big parcel Of steak and
onions for cooking purposes, and behind
trotted his fat and horid spouse, wheeling a
case of lager beer in baby's perambulator.
All the alley felt grieved, and even in
suited, at the spectacle.
OF course. there are manv other musicians
in the alley. Little Michael Muldoou pIays
the jews-harp-melody is deeply imbedded
in the souls of the Muldoon family. Then
the colored settlement are great banjo play
ers, and the Italian colony possesses a barrel
organ. There was monkey attached to the
organ some years ago, but he died Of old
age, and now the organ can appear in public
no more. Mr.. Timothy j. Flanagan has
"real Cremona" fiddle, and knows how to
play the wailing melodies OF "Ould Ireland"
thereon, while the flute, which the Young
German bartender plays at No. 9, is
charming addition to the concert Then
there is nation of sparrows in the alley,
which lends its ehirping to swell the tide OF
melody.
M'NALLY IN OUR ALLEY.
The following lyric was composed by one
of the falrest maidens in the Alley. 1t COM
memorates the virtues OF the Alley Apollo,
a certain Mr.. Patrick MeNally, for whose
six feet of stalwart manhood both Philoso-
pher and Rhymster have the greatest possl-
BILE admiration and respect. Readers of
Henry Carey's delightful old song will at
once perceive the vast superiority of the
new version, which is given below:
OF all the boys in love with me-
There's none like Pat McNally;
He is the best OF all my Deaux
And he boards down in our alley.
There's not high-toned dude in town
Can match with Pat McNally:
He is the best OF all my beaux
And he boards down in our alIeyf
ii.
His father works in Mooney's mill
And sometimes gets jag on:
While Pat himself for Bung q Co
Conducts a brew'ry wagon
The politicians in the ward
have hopes Of Pat McNally;
Obi he's the best of all my beaux.
And he boards down in our aIleyi