Daily Republican., 1890-06-26
THk ARIZONA KICKER.

Last issue Of the Arizona Kicker We ss. ~
tract the foalowinA:
our 0AIN.-On Monday Afternoon an
Italian with a'dancing bear struck the
town, and half an hour later Col, Sid
thompson, Assistant Rsgiseer OF Deeds.
eWoke from u suooxe he had been oujoy-
Ing 10 an srm-cAair In the Mighty West
billiard parlors. Whsu the colonel osw
the bear dance he made up his booxv
mind TO have . waltz with him. IN
friends called him of, but be wes piS.
heAded end obstinate and refused to stav
on. He suddenly jumped In on the bsar
with {oil and . whoop, and being new
TO our Ways the beast probably supposed
himself attacked. Al any rate he set to
work with teeth aud claws, and 90 ussJ
the colonel up 10 about three minutes
that he died last night The general
vordice OF the public 10 that his loss 10
our gain. lie had no enterprise a 3
citiren, and 90 . man some of uu would
have had to plant him within . io3
weeks anyhow.
SETTLED AT LAsT.-As will be no.
tieed elssw here In the regular court pro
ceedinRs, the legal trouble between the
editor Of the Kicker and Prof. Mccall has
" lust been settled and an amtca bie mn.
ders'andIng arrived at The profeseor
came here about two years ago, and being
In hard luck borrowed our only suudsy
shirt aud fifty cents In cash, aud later Oh
refused 10 either return tho same or
recognize our claim. We posted him a.
Q dead beat and hs sued ~ for 600. 600.
We proved him Z bigamist and be cred
Two shots at Us in front OF tho postofflce.
We advised lgnching, and he was laid
up for month In the attempt to horee-
whip uA The professor Instituted no
less than hye suits against US, and on
several ainerent occasions planned our
assassination.
Day before yesterday, while the pro-
lessor was laying for ns with . shotgun
At tho postof1ce, he was run over In
stampede oil mules. We were the first TO
reach him and render aid. He was car
ried to The Kicker office 10 an uncoD-
ecious condition, and II wac half sn hour |
before he came TO. Mutual friends seized |
upon the occasion 10 settle the trouble.
aud their Efforts wore successful. We
now desire to announce In Italics that
the professor 10 an honest, worthy pen-
tleman, possessed Of fine voice and we'll |
qualified to teach the divine art OF m usic.
On VI the other hsud, he subscribes for The I
Kicker, paying In advance, OF course,
ana ADVERTISE 70 the extent OF S24 Der
year. f
APPLY TO THE CoRoNER,-Just a.
IudRo Knight called a. The Kicker Office
and invited US to ride out to Lone Tree
WITH him In bis horse and buggy. and
half oh hour later We were there. The
boys had preceded us, and we found
hem 10 circle arouud "Dr. B. B, Bel.
pRer, late Of tue Royal College Of Medi.
line, Of London-the only dlscoverer Of
sure cure for consumption. The doc
or has been with us about . month
laiming TO cure almost everything on
arth, but after his remedies had I
nocked over half dozen citizens ths [
oys concluded that 1t was time for him
drop out He refused TO drop. Hence
committee called and asked him to take
Walk. He had taken the walk and ]
toed on barrel when We caught sig ht I
Y him. There WAS connecMO between 9
lie doctors neck and q stout limb. and
Q was making q speech.
The ductor recognized US at once and
esought us to explaiu 10 the crowd that
Q was in hurry to leave the country.
10 couldn't fly, but he would do the .
ext best thing. Although he had not d
dyertised with u, and he had Riyeu ali .
10 Job work to our cotempofary. We o
ould u t refuse his request. As a per- II
onsl favor to us the boys, after letting b
i'm hang long enough to insure . GOOD b
lse OF soro throat, cut him down, gave E
I'm nip Of whisky, and advised him to g
0 cast he went. The last we saw OF
I'm no was making such time as no Jack
lbbit In this countryDan ever hops to
lusi: Any one having any legal claim :,
l06 bottles Of consumption cure, =,
'gethsr with machine for mskiug pills. y
70 packs of cards and office furniture q
aiued at eS.25, will please apply to our !.
orthy coroner. While Or. BeIiuper -
Ill lives to the world at large, there is Z.
doubt that he 10 dead to this COM III
unity"