The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1890-10-05

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sure; but when a spoon was sent her to
eat it with she called out with shrill
laugh:
'I'll trouble you for fork. my dear;
| have not taken spoon meals since | was
a baby"
So that dinner was spoiled for every
one. and my poor little friend cried her
self i'll with a headache, and became
| guilty of most unchristian sentiments
not vet abated, and all for what cause?
| Simply because that woman cultivated
! a brutal honesty under all circumstances,
and had not the grace Of pretending
! contentment she did not feel
You may say that she was simply de-
fcient in good breeding, but l reply,
good breeding involves a certain reti-
cence that under other circumstances is
stignatized as hypocrisy.
One form Of sincerity is to my mind
especially Objectionable, and that is, re-
mari king upon the appearance Of i'll
health, or OF WEAKNESS or worry in the
face and manner Of casual acquaint-
anGe.
why, how thin you've become!" or
How pale you are!' or What have you
been doing to YOURSELF" or You're not
looking as well as when | saw you last"
all are over sincere speeches. likely to
offend some persons and to frighten
others. There is a New Orleans story of
a practical joke resulting in what one
may almost call murder. 1t was in yell
low fever time, and half a dozen men
cOnspired against another, of some
what timid and nervous temperament.
The first one met him, and breaking off
his morning salutation exclaimed, But
man alive, how i'll you're looking! What
IS it?'
The victim declared that nothing was
the matter, and went on, feeling little
nervous. The second met him and made
a similar attack. until as the fifth ap-
preached the poor fellow fell up against
the wall, and begged the startled con-
spirator to call a carriage and take him
to the hospital.
Well, he died, and died of fright, and
although we need not in every day life
expect to produce quite so startling an
effect, the story is a warning. 1t is not
only Notifying to be told that you look
pale and tired and under the weather."
it is really injurious. and it is in my
opinion decidedly bad taste.
OF course, in the case Of ones intimate
friends, of those one loves and feels sure
of being understood by, it is different;
true and tender sympathy is one of the
most precious gifts Of love, and the balm
administered with one hand viii more
than heal any little wound to vanity
given with the other. With such COM
paniOn one may dare to be sincere; that
is, on the subject of health, and yet not
on every ground even so. Men are apt
not to quite understand this limitation,
and good and honest man viii often
say things to his f1ncee or to his wife
which had much better be left unsaid
No intimacy, no tenderness Of affection
ever makes it jUstiiiable to tell a woman
that some other woman Is more charm
ing than herself, although the speaker
add that she to whom be speaks is dearer
10 him.
once heard a man say to his wife,
"She has the same lovely complexion
you had when you We're young" Poor
woman! She had complexion enough
for the next few minutes, and felt that
she would always hate me for having
heard it. Again. | heard young fellow
tell woman Of about 40 that she must
have been very handsome when she was
a girl, and another asked friend Of
mine what color her hair used to be.
What color is it ncw:" asked she So
renely.
"Why-er-er-gray, isn't it," STAN
mered the youth.
"Oh, ! didn't know you were color
blind; Tn dreadfully sorry" said she
sweetly, and he retired not at all in good
order.
People come 20 see you, and when
they go away say that they have had a
delightful time Sometimes they have
and sometimes they have not; but in the
latter case had much rather they
should not be sincere about it. The
phrase means nothing; it is a silver GER
tiicate, and I should never think of de-
manding cash for it, although prefer
taking it TO not having it. You tell
people that you liked their song, or their
poem, or their lecture, or their book, if
you are called upon to say anything
about their efforts, and unless 1t has
been a very unfortunate effort, indeed,
there is always something about it that
You did like, and it is quite unnecessary
70 refer to the other parts.
Somebody meets you and begins a te-
diOus, desultory discourse upon his or her
own affairs, and bores you numerically.
Shall you cape in somebody's face, and
say, Il don't care in the very least about
il, or any Of it, That would be quite
sincere. but ] really think it is better 70
be a little insiEcere and smile prettily
and say, Yes" or No" or Indeed"
in the appropriate places and gently ex-
tricate yourself from the clutches of the
bore without TOO much frankness.
OF course do not mean that in mat
ters reaching down iLto the SGbSol Of
life one Is 70 evace or palter with the
truth. There are times. and not so very
seldom, when It Is ones duty TO stand
bravely up and speak the truth. though
it risk the love Of one we hold most
dear. or the y0mradesuip Of p valued as
soclate; bat when these times come, we
know II for certain. and the man or
woman who shiras the call does II to the
loss OF their self respect, whether others
know II " not. There Sre times when
4
flee ara times whe1 the uobl->t and