davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

| had just gone down on my knees
and was in the most impassioned love
scene in the play, and the house was
en- rapport with the scene, when an
unearthly b-a-a came up from the
regions below the stage. The house
was very still and the sound went all
through it. 1t might have been all
right if it had stopped there, but it
didn't stop, and before the audience
had recovered from the first surprise
the b-a-a sounded again and the crowd
shouted with merriment. The actors
were affected, and the play for that
night was ruined. / don't remember
whether finished my love speech or
not, but l think not. We found af-
forwards that sheep had been shut
up in the market by mistake, and the
sound came up through fue and
sounded as plainly as if made on the
stage.
"The American public" said Mr..
Thorpe, as he switched his conversa-
ton to recent observation, "are not as
enthusiastic as the English people.
They never grow really excited, and,
if they don't like play they do not
hiss but leave the house. Neither do
they applaud sentiment as the Eng.
lish people do, and l am aware Of the
fact that l have not the same substrata
of mental connection with the Amer
lean audience that l have with the
English. They are certainly recep-
tive, but there their feeling ends. -
Elk.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03
A Two-Sided Moral.

"It is true that much human misery
results from lack of economy" said
a man whose face wore the marks of
midnight thought, "but / once knew
man who now owes his happiness to
riotous living. The story is a sad
one. There were two brothers, John
and Hank Bullfnch. They were
twins. They were graduated with
credit, and with equal showing they
went out into the world. They had
no money, but they managed to get
into business. John was careful and
economical Hank was prodigal and
reckless. If John could not save one
dollar per day. he saved SO cents. If
Hank could not spend one dollar per
day he spent 80 cents. At the end
of their first two years in business the
difference between the brothers was
very great. John had money; Hank
had nothing. John owned horse
and buggy, but Hank was compelled
to walk. He did not complain, hut
it was with sad smile that he would
step from the middle of the road, to
keep from being run over by his
brother. One night while John was
driving around town his horse became
frightened, ran away and smashed the
buggy. Just as John was striking
the ground Hank was beating his way
into minstrel show. John was kill
ed. Statistics proved that he did not
even kick after he struck the earth.
The dead mans property was willed
to charitable institution"
"Say," some one remarked, "ain't
you drifting from the point Of the
story Z"
"Oh, no."
"But you said you once knew man
who owned his happiness to riotous
living"
Eyes, it is fact. You see that
Hank, had he been able TO buy a
horse-had he saved up enough
money and bought one-would doubt
less have been killed, and, in fact
Hank was trying at one time to buy
the horse that killed John. Hank is
still living and enjoying himself
though he is afraid to save money
| think that the careful, economical
man has been praised too much. We
ought to give the spendthrift a
chance"
II think" said member of the
company, that the moral Of your
story is destroyed by one fact"
What's that :"
"Well, you see, if John had been
more economical he wouldn't have
bought that horse"
"By George, l believe you're right
Well, sir, thought I had that thing
fixed up all right. Thought / was
going to give economy a black eye.
l was going to be more reckless, but
don't believe l will. Was going to
order the drinks, but you have taught
me to economise."
When the man who had told the
story got up and left the room, the
old fellow-known rs "tough"-whC
had changed the moral, looked at a
companion and said
BLAMED il he didn't beat us after
all. Arkansas Traveller.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03
He Shouted, Next"

"Yes," said the proprietor Of an up
town barber shop, "Jim was good
workman, but l had to get rid of
him."
"What was the trouble ?"
He was too absent minded and
forgetful. One old fellow, with a
head like billiard ball, he never
failed to ask if he didn't want a
shampoo. Another bald.headed old
chap got mad because Jim insisted
upon selling him bottle of elixir
that was warranted to keep the hair
from falling out; ayoung man who
was slightly under the influence of
beer, fell asleep in the chair and Jim
shaved off his mustache. l had to
call in a policeman then. He cut
one mans ear nearly off while watch
ing dog fight in the street, and some
times he would rub hair oil over a
customers face instead of his head,
and fill his ears full of lather and
forget to wipe it out. Jim didn't
mean nothing wrong, but, as ! said,
he was absent minded. You remem-
ber when old Deacon Jones died ?"
"Yes."
"Well, the family sent for barber
to shave him, and l told Jim to go
up. 1t was that job that lost him
his situation. He did the work all
right, nobody ever found fault with
Jim's work but when he had put on
the finishing touches and pulled the
towel off the poor old deacon, he turn
ed round and shouted 'Nextp 30
that people heard him block away.
So / told Jim guessed I'd have to
let him go."-Brooklyn Life.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

Courtney Thorpe, of the Vokes Co..
tells All interesting episode of his ear
ly experience on the American stage.
at was during my first season in this
country" said he, land we we're play
in" THE Parvenu' in Washington or
Baltimore, l have forgotten which.
The opera house was located over a
market. Everything went off smooth
ly until the middle of the second act.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

There are two sides to every ques-
tion-the wrong side and our slde.-
Terre Haute Express.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

In regattas catboats ought to be
the first to come to the scratch.-Yon-
kers Gazette.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

"Will you pass the butter, Mr..
Bronson ?" "Not if l see it in time
to turn and 60 the other way. madam"
New York Commercial Advertiser.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

Tramp-"Say, mum, your dog bit
me-" Lady-"Well, never mind, I'll
wash his mouth. Good News.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

The dude does not look SO much
like an ass, clad in his blazer, as he
resembles a zebra. This is rather
rough on the zebra, too.-New York
Commercial Advertiser.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

"Tis hard to part" sadly remark
ed the man with bald crown sur
mounted by three little whisps of hair.
-Somerville Journal.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

Nobody seems able to account for
the scarcity of apples, but the small
boy will endeavor to find the cores
Boston Transcript.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

The maid--"Oh, yes; / had love-
ly time this summer. There were five
men to each girl" New York Her.
ald
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03
0. |. PARTRIDGE.
Real Estate Agent

Rooms 4, s, Dawson Block. I'd
WIN take chargeof estates for residents and non-
residents. collect rents. pay taxes, place insurance
obtain abstracts Of title, ETC.
Office hours-10 to 12A. NJ, 4 to6P.M.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

Parasol sticks are a little longer
this season, but sticks for soda remain
about the same.-Burlington Free
Press.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

"Why did you marry man who is
80 years ofagei" Because l couldn't
find one 80 equally as rich. Chicago
Tribune.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

Sunday school teacher "And
now who can tell me what special act
of favor God showed to Lot p
Small boy: "Please sir, he turned
his wife into pillar of salt."-Puck.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

"That new girl is rather a shrink
ing, modest, sort Of u creature, Scad-
ley, isn't she ?" "Well, / should say
she was. didn't visit her more than
a week before she suggested that l
turn down the light in order that she
might hide her bushes. ."-Philadel-
phia Times.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

A gentleman in search of man to
do some work met on his way high
ly respectable lady, not so young as
she once was, and asked her: "Can
you tell me where l can find man ?"
mo, ! cannot" she replied, smiling |;
"for have been looking these twenty
years for one myself."-London Fun.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03
WIT AND HUMOR.

The good baker is thorough bread
man.--Washington Post.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

Dolph-Here comes Eva's beau.
Let's ask him for ten cents.
Clair-No, wait till he gets in the
house and is talking to Eva. He
won't refuse before her.
Dolph-That's SO, and she won't
scold before him.-Munsey's Weekly.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03
MIGHIGANCENTRAL
"Thc Niagara Falls Route"
Time Card in Effect

'Daily. Daily except Sunday. Parlor car on
day trains and sleeping on night trains.
J. WHITING, Ticket Agent
o.w. RUGGLEs. G. p. & t. Agt.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

like an ass, clad in his blazer, as he
resembles a zebra. This is rather
rough on the zebra, too.-New York
Commercial Advertiser.
Sunday school teacher: "And
now who can tell me what special act
of favor God showed to Lot p
Small boy; "Please sir, he turned
his wife into pillar of alt."-Puck.
A pious hope.-"You must be as
quiet as possible tonight, Johnny"
said his mother, "for we are to have
the minister for supper" "Have him
for supper, eh? Well, l hope he'll
taste good. Ashland Press.
Young Mrs. Tocker says she really
believes that Charley has gone into
the lumber business without telling
her word about it, because he is con-
stantly talking in his sleep about buy
ing chips Washington Post.
Maude-"Did you have a good
time at the beach. Alice ?" Alice
Didn't 1! l was engaged to all,
three young men at the hotel at the
same time, and the other girls were
perfectly furious. Lawrence Ameri-
can.
He-"It is really 80 warm here
that think | will 60 out and get a
breath Of air, if YOU will excuse me.
Miss Bjones."
She CON his return)-"Do you call
that air, Mr.. Bjohnson ?"-Harvard
Lampoon
Putting Him at His Ease.-Papa
(who used u bad word when he tore
his trousers)-"I forgot myself then,
Sammy. 1t was wrong of me to say
such a word" Sammy-"O, you
needn't apologize, papa | often use
it myself."-Life.
Dolph-Here comes Eva's beau.
Let's ask him for ten cents.
Clair-No, wait till he gets in the
house and is talking to Eva. He
won't refuse before her.
Dolph-That's so, and she won't
scold before him.-Munsey's Weekly.
"That new girl is rather shrink
ing, modest, sort Of u creature, Scad-
ley, isn't shef" "Well, ] should say
she was. l didn't visit her more than
a week before she suggested that |
turn down the light in order that she
might hide her bushes. "-Philadel-
phia Times.
A gentleman in search of man to
do some work met on his way high.
ly respectable lady, not so young as
she once was, and asked her: "Can
you tell me where l can find man p
"No, l cannot" she replied, smiling
"for have been looking these twenty
years for one myself. f."-London Fun.
Lazarus Goldstein-I love your
daughter, and would like to marry
her.
Isdore Goldfogle-You may have
her my poy. Nit Rebecca, who is 1S
years old, give $4,000; nit Sarah,
who is "a, 10000; Lorenza. who is
30, $4,000. Vich one do you want
Goldstein-Haven't you vun about
so?
Jimmy Peck crushing into the
house where Mrs. Xavier is with his
mother)-Ma, | just saw woman
arrested for wearing mems clothes, SC
you'd better look out
Mrs. Peck-What do you mean
Jimmy?
Jimmy-Wby, heard you tell pa
this morning that he could under
stand that you we're going to wear the
breeches in this house, SOW le
20 my earl-Jester.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

A pious hope.-"You must be as
quiet as possible tonight, Johnny"
said his mother, "for we are to have
the minister for supper" "Have him
for supper, eh? Well, | hope he'll
taste good."- Ashland Press.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03
Detroit, Bay City & AIpena R.R.

Mail and Accom- Mail and Accom-
Express modation Express mediation.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

Maude-"Did you have a good
time at the beach. Alice ?" Alice
Didn't 1! l was engaged to all,
three young men at the hotel at the
same time, and the other girls were
perfectly furious. Lawrence Ameri-
can.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

Young Mrs. Tocker says she really
believes that Charley has gone into
the lumber business without telling
her word about it, because he is con-
stantly talking in his sleep about buy
ing chips ashington Post.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

Lazarus Goldstein-I love your
daughter, and would like to marry
her
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1890-09-03

Putting Him at His Ease.-Papa
(who used bad word when he tore
his trousers)-"I forgot myself then,
Sammy. 1t was wrong of Inc to say
such a word" Sammy-"O, you
needn't apologize, papa | often use
it myself"
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-03-15
VIRGINIA ITEMS.
MAJ TIERS OF INTEREST FROM
ALL OVER THE STATE.

Papers In the Cornerstone Of n Peters
burg Hall Found 10 be Ruined bv Wa
ter-Mr. Pryor's Illness AIexandria's
Musical Association.
PETERSBURG, Va, Mar iI.-rspccial.
The insurance on the odd Fellows Associa.
tion Hall on Sycamore street. which was
destroyed by fire several months ago. has
lust been paid. The amount received bv
the association was $1,000, with salvage.
The association will rebuild on the same
site as early rs practicable. The corner
stone of the burned building was opened to-
day. The contents. which consisted Of
papers Of various kinds. had been ruined
by water soaking in on them.
The Ettrick Manufacturing Company
have received a large number of annlica-
uons irom persons outside of the city for
work In their factory. % take the places Of
the operatives who have struck.
General Roger a. Pryor of New York. is
IN the city, on his return from NottOway
courthouse, where be has been TO see his
father Rev. Theoderick Pryor who was
stricken with paralysis some days ago.
General Pryor reports his fathers condition
as unchanged. Rev. Dr. Pryor is cighty-dyo
years OF age, and has been in the ministry
for fifty-iVe years. lie was born in Din
widdie county, where he at one time prac-
ticed law.
The day hands i'm the large tobacco fac
tory of David Dunlop, i'm this city. who
number about POO. adopted resolutions To-
day asking for the ten hour system without
any reduction of pay. Those hands now
work eleven hours, The resolutions were
presented 10 Mr.. Dunlop, but no final action
was taken in the matter The hands made
no threats Of a strike.
The Blue Ridge Cotton Manufacturing
Company, Of this city, have made no rcduc-
tion in the wages Of their operatives on ac-
count Of the ten-hour system.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-03-15

NORFOLK. Va. Mar. H. Special. F.
ARRANGEMENTS have been made 10 hold an
art exhibition in this city beginning April
9th. under the auspices Of the Young Mems
Christian Association. The pictures viii
De selected only from the works of the most
prominent professional artists OF the day
and neither labor nor expense viii be
spared TO make the exhibition perfect sue
cess. No more suitable place could be
found for the advantageous display of these
high works of art tnan the handsome rooms
of the Young Mems Christian Assocciation'
and 10 is only necessary 10 announce that the
works of such artists will be shown az the
Sartains, Diclman. Chase, Chapney, the
Norans. &c. Of New York city, 10 ensure
lively interest among the lovers OF art ana
culture. The community at large, as well
as those interested in educational enter
prises should welcome this opportunity OF
bringing the best examples Of modern art
within the reach Of all. I'm addition TO the
collection Of pictures, which viii include
oils. water cOlors. etchings and mezz0-tints,
there will be exhibited many from the old
masters. owned i'm this city, and also de-
partment of antiques and curios.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-03-15

this line soon: in fact. IT looks as il we are
on the eve Of a decided boom.
A prominent gentleman Of this place has
invented machine for making cigarettes.
Those who are familiar with II say IL is
very complete and will be a decided sue
cess. lie is now in Washington having il
patented.
The street committee have been ordered
by the Council 10 advertise for bids for paw.
ing Main street.
An election has been ordered for the 9th
OF March, 10 take the sense Of the people ON
proposition for the town 10 buy the cleo
trio light plant. At present il is private
corporation, but it is thought best that the
town should own and operate il.
Cards are out for the marriage Of Mr.. r.
5. Barbour and Miss Bessie Stoyall at the
Presbyterian Church on the morning Of the
18th.
Dr. A. Trent Clarke, who has been in
New York for several months taking "a post
graduate course in medicine, returned home
last Saturday. DR.. Clarke is one Of the best
physicians in this section Of the State,
Messrs. j. NJ. Darlington a Co.. of this
place. have received a contract on the Elk
horn extension Of the Norfolk and Western
Railroad
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-03-15
FROM LYNCHBURG.
Electric Machine Works-James River
and Bedford Railroad.

and Bedford Railroad.
LYNCHBURG. Va, Mar ii-fspecial r.
a plant for the manufacture Of small ma
chinery, fittings and switches for electric
light lines will be established in this city at
am early day Mr.. Cecil Pool. superintendent
of the Piedmont Electric Light, Of this
place. Mr.. Pool expects 10 have the plant
in operation 10y the lst Of May. with ample
capital and force. The articles 10 be manu-
iactured are almost exclusively inventions
of Mr.. Pool, who is an accomplished cleo
trician and a graduate of the Electrical
school of Cornell University. The cstab-
lishment will be the only one Of the kind
south of New York or east of Chicago,
where all The instruments now used in the
south are made. Mr.. Pool thinks he can
establish a large trade in the Southern
states.
Bedford city, formerly Liberty. il certain
~ growing lively since she took "a new name.
The people are expecting the James River
and Bedford Railroad 90 be soon built. con-
Meeting the Norfolk and Western with the
Richmond and Allegheny at Big Island,
and 10 will open up the finest Of iron ore
beds. On the south side Of the county has
been found asbestos in large and ineXhaust-
ibc quantities. There has also been found
fine mica. worth SO per pound al
retail. There is magnetic ore Of quail
ity I'm the southern and northern parts Of
the county. on the line OF the proposed rail-
road. furnishing it with plenty Of freight.
Upon the completion of this new road the
whistle and the hammer will be heard all
over Bedford county.
Rev John 4. Edwards is better from his
attack Of grip. and hopes TO be able 20 Oc-
cupy his pulpit Sunday.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-03-15

WYTHEvILLE, Va, Mar. A. Special.
Within the last three days real estate IN
Wytheyille has advanced from - 10 80 per
cent. in value, and property is changing
hands rapidly. ON yesterday Mr.. stephen
+. Ewald, of Roanoke, bought square on
LAWYERS Hill. known as the "Chain lot"
for $1,000, and to-day herefIsed $1,000 for it.
Mr.. Il. g.. Kent sold seventeen acres Of
land near town on yesterday for
$1,000. and it was re-s0ld ON
same day for $1,000. Two acres
owned by Mr.. :. W. Williams in the sub
urbs. brought $1,000; the company who
purchased it refusing $500 for il this
morning. A small house on the south end
of Main street. owned by Mr.. Robert Rogers,
for which he paid 500 last November sold
on Yesterday for ST 100 cash. MIR. ii. B.
Maupin purchased few days ago, a tract Of
land near town, from DR.. William Farmer
for 81. 900, which was sold neXtd day for $1,000.
Several other less valuable pieces OF
property have changed hands.
The ice factory is an assured thing, all
the stock within few hundred dollars, being
taken. new clothing store and another
millinery store have been opened here IN the
last week. also an Office Of the Singer Sew
ing Machine Company. II is reported that
a large hotel is 70 be built on Scamp Jack
son" by the company who purchased the
tract of land, so-called, few days ago.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-03-15
DYNAMITE FROM CANNON.
The First Successful Experiment ON Bis
scale.

=
scale.
SYRACUSE. y. y. Mar 1.-THE first sue
cessful experiment on big scale of firing
dynamite from cannon, with gun-powder
as the projecting force. was made in deep
rayine near the village 0f ierryyilie Mad.-
son county. this afternoon. by DR.. j. e..
Justin ana hi- corps of assistants. The ie-l
was witnessed bg quite large number Of
persons from different parts Of The state.
The dynamite used was the most powerful
made, containing - per cent. AZ nitro
glycerine. The Doctor and bis assistants
spent the forenoon in loading the shells,
four in number.
AT o'cl0bk +. NJ, everything was In
readiness, and the firing began an hour
later. A shell, containing i've and one
quarter pounds OF dynamite, WAS fired
first from the big twolyc-i0n cannon,
the amount Of powder used being
fourteen pounds. 10 struck the
limest0ck cliff at the end Of the gorge "a
quarter OF a mile away and glanced up
wardwithOut doing very much damage. Two
other shells We're fired with similar results.
The fourth she'll containing eighteen
pounds of dynamite, struck the cih with
such effect that TWO huge masses Of rock
were sent rolling down into the gorge. The
Doctor is satisfied with tho results. ,ecre-
tary Tracy will be invited 10 attend the
next experiment.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1890-03-15
AN EARTHeN AVALANCHE
Buries Alive q Party Of seven Railway
Norkmen.

PIrrsBURG, PA, Mar. IA special %
the Times from Cumberland. Md. says;
"Thls morning. between 3 and O'Clock, a
"A huge rock rolled down the mountain side
and fell upon the West Virginia Central
Railroad track, in "a cut between ,haiiee
and Blaine. The work train. with crew %
twelve men. was dispatched To- the
spot 10 remove the obstruction and
clear the track. A large cable was placed
around the rock and attached t0 the engine.
that Il might Dee dragged from the cut. All
was nearly ready, and the men were making
a final adjustment of the rope, when great
mass of earth came rushing down upon
them from the steep mountain side, and
buried seven Of the men Out of sight. Their
hOrrifcd companions rushed 10 their rescue,
and as speedily as possible eXhumod the ill-
fated ones. Two We're dead when taken
out one has died since and three were sc-
riously or fatally injured. The dead are.
James %. Lambert. thailee. W. Va leaves
"A widow and family; Josephine Macheni,
an Italian. unmarried. The injured We're
brought 90 this city and are now under the
care of the company's physician.