New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1890-03-08
THE TiLK or THE DAY.

"There is only one thing" recently said magazine
writer, that surprises me more than the rejection
Of so many Of my articles and that is that many
Of my articles accepted Are the ways Of the
editor as inscruable this remark would indicate.
is the man who made 1t just taking a chance shot
at the editorial sanctuml
No Test Requircd-Patent VERY loud)-I am
completely deaf that can hardly hear pistol shot
Physican--Thcn, | suppose, there's no use tak-
power Of hearing Meet me downtown at the Stock
Exchange "A few minutes before 3. ! want to see
whether you can hear the noise before the closing
Patient after having read the invitation)No need
Of that, Doctor; that's where / got deaf'-lPuck.
Clubs arc multiplying in Boston with amazing
rapdity; in fact the city seems to be club mad
This gives point to recent remark OF bright
woman. ave returning she said, 4" to the DAYS
Of savagery, and are being dubbed to DEATH
An exchange speaks Of a who was struck
by a train and instantly killed. and adds that he
lived only half hour after being struck and was
mny be somc t queer 5oSt it. but % have e
quently noticed that the man who lives only half an
conscious nc greater part OF the day.-(Norrisown
| Herald.
In "Thc Gondollers," the Grand Inquistor tells
Casilda that she is distinctly jimp' meaning that
shc Is and handsome. This is word that should
not be allowed lie buried in libretto. 1t Is Itself
both neat and handsome and will I'LL many long,
| felt want.
Fertile in Expedients.-Agent--Id make you my
| Ianltor only must have a married man
| Applcant-Kcep the place open for an hour ana
III tx that It's easier get married than 10 gct
| ob.r-The Epoch
Gan end to apologies" shouts the gallant Colonel
watterson, in The Louisville Courier Journal We
| Infer from this that Henry has talDn of his coat
and is going to hit something with a duh thud
a Blghted Race-Thc phrase Come of the peril
/
honor 10 descend from yonr present altitude 70 nay
ton degeneratng at the rate Of five volts per yeari
detroit Free Press.
Commander McCala IS said to be popular as
clubman in Washington. But as a swordsman in the
Navy he TO be decidedly unpopular.
Just indignation nrigss-Ilelq III, What; your hnrry
A communication signed IOne>tas,' and The
blamed fool added an extra $50 10 it.-lTerc lIaute
Express.
vital Statistics OF Norway. recently published show
an expectation OF life in that country that hardly
he paralleled in any other country. The mean durs
ton OF life is 1888 years for males and 33O years
for females. In England the mean Duration OF
life is Al 80 years for males and 4l.s2 years for
females. In other words Norwegian at his birth,
may rea sonaby expect to live years longer than
an Engllshman. But of course Englshman would
reply 70 this that short life in the tight little
Isle is more desirable than a long life in NORWAY.
| in the spirit Of tho line Better fifty years of
Europe than cycle Of Cathay.'
Fixed Hablt.-Brlsk Young Man ION a collecting
| tour-Mr. Bunkam | have here a little bill which /
Democratic Congress (furiously)-I am not here.
sir. absent.-(Chicago Tribune.
What's thisi General Bragg, who. in 1854. loved
Mr. Cleveland for the enemies he had made. declares his
preference for william C. whitney a. the Democratic
candidate In 1892. Well may Mr.. Cleveland exclam
Bragg is a good dog. but IIoldast Is BETTER BY tho
way who is cnactng the part of Iloldfast for the ex
| PRESIDENT
Mrs Largent-what, not like terrapinl I'm as
| tOnishcd. ..
| awful.
! Mrs. Iargent-They considered quite Injury,
and they are very expensive, you know.
| Mrs Struckcm-Oh! | think will try little moro
| -(}oston Transcript.