The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-07-19
COMBING THE COLONEL.
Old John Perdue's Practical Political
Joke Gave Him the Nomination.

Old John Perdue's Practical Political
Joke Gave Him the Nomination.
From the Nel0 York World.
Sampson county, Kentucky, was in a grea'
political ferment over the approaching
election of county judge. The nominal
ing convention was to meet on Saturday
and on Friday night two well-known poll
ticians caught in a rain-storm stopped at
the house of old John Perdue. The politi-
cians Maj. Bloodgood and Col. Noix, were
sly candidates for the coveted position
so sly in fact, that neither one knew of the
schemes of the other.
After supper, while old John and his
guests were sitting on the porch talking
over the coming struggle and listening to q
wet katydid that held vesper services in q
locust tree. old John, getting upand stretch
ing himself. said to the major:
"Let me see you moment, please"
The major followed him TO the end of the
gallery.
Major" old John whispered. "I am
compelled to tell you something. You gen
tlemen are welcome to stay with me as long
as you like, but ability to accommodate
cannot always be measured by willingness
to do so. The truth is, 1 haven't but one
spare bed"
getherN the major rejoined.
"Yes. you can, but the truth is the colonel
is awfully peculiar"
''How SOP
"Well, as rational as he appears while
stirring about, he's strange man in bed.
Our families, you know, are we'll acquain-
ted, and | therefore know all about him.
His popularity comes from scare he re-
ceived when he was child. 1t seems that
a dog once tried to bite him; aud now,
just before he dozes off to sleep, he begins
TO growl, and, unless something is done tc
stop him, he begins to bite fearfully."
'-Humph,n the major grunted, that:
odd, but what can be done to stop HIM after
he begins to Rrowl"
"Well, his brother told me how he used
to work it, He always took course comb
to bed with him and would rake the colo
mel with it when he began to growl. AS
strange as it may seem, it was the only
thing that would quiet him. The family
doctor said that comb was somehow the
only thing that would start the hood tC
circulating"
THAT'S very odd. And would it quiet
HING
"Would make him act just like lamb
Why, he ulster insist that his brother should
take the comb to bed with him. He don't
like for any one to mention the freakist
misfortune. as he always terms it, but II
would be doing him a great favor il you
would take the comb to bed with you and
give him rake In case he should begin tx
growl. l am telling you this because | am
your friend because know that you are
good timber, and especially because / hops
that you NAV secure his influence If yoU
should ever desire any office. Don't you
know that we always respect the man that
understands our peculiaritles before we are
asked to explain them to hin2 He is sensi
tive that way, and if he sees that you un.
derstand him he will then know that you
have had your eye on him, have held him
in your mind"
"All right. You get me the comb and
will go through with the ceremony when
the time comes"
"Heres one; put it in your pocket"
They returned to the colonel and after
awhile, when the major stepped into the
house to get drink of water, the old man
said:
''You and the major are good friends,
am glad to see.n
Yes" replied the colonel; 81 think hi
is a first-rate fellow.n
"Glad you like him, for you and he will
have to sleep together tonight, for the fac
Is, | have only one spare bed"
THAT will be all right, reckon" sait
the colonel
Eyes, but the truth is, the major is tn
most peculiar fellow you ever saw"
"In what wayW
GAS a bedfellow. I was very intimat
with his family and knew all about him
1t seems that he had a nervous troubl
when he was a boy, and could not go t
asleep until some one growled like a dog
l have known him to lie tossing in bed TO
hours at time, and then when | woulC
go to his bed and growl he would doze OF
like a lamb"
II never before heard of an affection s.
strange said the colonel.
81 either, but then it is a very easy mat
ter to relieve him. He and fellow named
Buck johnson were once opposing candi
dates for prosecuting attorney. Well, the,
had to sleep together one night. Bucl
knew of his peculiar affection, and shortl,
after they went to bed Buck began to growl
The major didn't say anything that night
but next day he withdrew from the race
declaring that he would not run against 81
good man as Buck"
"You don't say sol" exclaimed the colo
mel.
Eyes do. and know it to be fact.
would advise you to humor him in the SAM
way"
"I'll do So.
'6uSh, ne 8 coming DacK.
1--WE are going to have more rain,
think" said the major, as he resumed hi
seat.
Yes" the colonel responded. ''but
hope that it will not interfere with the con
ventIon. If the attendance is large and tn
proceedings harmonious, the results will b.
of great tenefit TO the county"
"Who do you reckon will be nominated
for judge?" old John asked.
Neither of the candidates that hav,
been named. We have better timber thai
any of those fellers.n
"Well,n said the major, yawning, I"
reckon we better go to bed s as to be il
trim for the work tomorrow"
II will show you the room." the old mar
remarked, arising.
The politicians were shown into an uppel
room and the man, placing candle on the
mantelpiece, babe them good night anc
went downstairs. "What noise was that!
the major asked when the old man hac
quilted the room.
II didn't hear any noise," the colone
answered.
II did; it sounded like some one gaspine
for breath" He might have heard noist
might have heard old John struggling to
suppress his laughter.
Suppose we go to bed,n said the major
"All right. You go ahead and l viii
blow cut the CANDLE
Thav tauxad FOR sanoa Time altar lvfno