Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1890-10-23
WHAT HE WOULD DO.
A General Rainy MOrninG Growi From
che Man who Rode In Q Herdio.

IT I were District Commissioner" said .
man in hsrdic this morning Who had never
occupied such small quarters before. I'D make
somebody do something % that ~ poor
wretches who, BY reason Of natural and un-
natural causes have TO ride In public convey
ances, need not suffer 90 much I really would
I'd have An order issued making the owners Of
these coaches punch holes through the roof.
90 that some Of the foul cir might escape. I'd
make IL penal otfenss II Q single public w.
hicle was ever started On the street without .
ventilator in the top. I'd hold every stock
holder personally responsible for diseases
bresthed into lungs from the air that 90
s sSssu e in ,,a the roof 'p;ss when
cold caught when window 10 opened IN order
10 get fresh breath or two. I'd punish every
driver-poor fellows, it's not 20 much their
fault after all--for each stop he makes after the
seats are ell taken aud ten men are standing in
senger who sits next to the caeh boz on every
fare he deposits. and I'd let him charge the
company for each financial Transaction with
the driver for tickets or change.
IN MAXI IT A cRrMI
for man to wear . rubber coat In Q public
conveyance, and I'd fne the other one who
carries a cane on . rainy day. An umbrella
is bad enough - An eyepuncher,
but il 10 necessary evil, while . cane
is an impudent burden Then I'd allow the
company TO charge double fare on the man
who forgets to move up to the front in the mar
row aisle when there 10 a space ahead OF him
and folks behind him. I'd also fine woman
who will not take . seat when il IL offered TO
her by . gentleman, but who stands up Eve
minutes longer while she protests that she
would really rather stand I'd fne her twice
for the ib and once for taking up time and
room when both are valuable.
lis there anything else Id do?" he gasped
as he grabbed frantically for . strap 70 keep
himself from falling when the coach made q
sudden stop. "les. there's lots more I'd do.
In the FIRST place ID not confne my attention
to the herdics. Look there" He pointed
through the misty window to . passing car.
''See that mass OF suffering humanity. Look
at that poor little mantle one with the gray
beard-who has just room for his toes on the
platform and for his fingers on the handle,
while the shelter roof drips water down on his
collar. I'd first pension that man for suffering
SO, and then I'd fog him for being fool enough
to ride. And yet he has 10 ride. He's too poor
to own carriage and too old to walk, and he ID
unfortunate enough 70 live 20 far down town
that the cars are all
CROWDED BEFORE THEY REACH nrM.
"But see! just look at thatl He has gone.
by Jover' and sure enough, the little old man
had lost his grip IS the car swung around q
curve and was falling into . pool of water.
When the herdic moved on he had picked him.
self up and was limping back 10 his precarious
but precious station on the square inch of the
platform.
Eyes, I'd do something about that" con-
tinued the wish-I-were man, glowering and
talking excitedy. I'D make that street car
line and every other line triple its accommoda-
tons on morning like this instead of running
so few cars that each one is filled before it has
gone three squares away from the terminus.
Id make the company pay stated sum for
every passenger standing on the platforms and
you'd soon see them come to time"
Here the herdic stopped at the junction be-
tween the Blaine house and the Executive
Mansion and nine-tenths Of the load poured
out into the rain to wait for the other coach.
.'Just see there" the would-be reformer went
on as he slipped down with sigh into seat
thus vacated, still talking.
mot SIGN OF A SHELTER,
not a board, and half Of those folks withou,
umbrellas. But that's their fault IL they
haven't 1t is the fault Of the Commissioners,
however, that the company 10 not allowed 10
build shelter there for its transferred passen-
gers. just as the avenue line has done at 7th
street. If / we're Commissioner there'd be a
change. I'd let 'em build neat iron roof
or I'd ct least give the transfer agent
box to stand in. Oh, I'd soon make
changes. I'd satisfy the public and the com.
panies and punish them both at the same time
Thered be just as much kicking then as now,
but there'd be more comfort and less disease
I'd be terror to stockholders and the horror
of men who forget things. I'd prove blessing
to everybody, but it might hurt Ugh! This i,
where take my shower bath. Da, d." and
with this the man who would do such remarka.
BILE things if he were in power plunged out oil
the herdic and into dispensary of wet-weather
comforts, where he took q three-fnger drink oil
brandy. He stopped kicking then.