Tombstone epitaph., 1890-01-25
A WORD ABOUT BORIS
Even the Most Incor-igibIe of the IIz Can
 Be Advised.


 man as he bowed out a visitor from his
 ofice
 Certainly, every body is at times a
 bore, for this question of bores has two
 sides, writes Harkley Harker in the New
 fork Weekly. There is no such thfu0
 as boring with an auger into granite
 Diock' There is no such thing as boring
 WIIh your finger into a pine log. A sO-
 cIdI pore must meet a social sensitive.
 Some men are never bored by anvbodv:
 they are of such unfailing good nature,
 such philosophic patience and helpful-
 ness toward all, they read men so clear
 y and judge them so charitably. that the
 most persistent, bothersome fellow
 does not eXasperate nor weary them.
 They say some sbillful word, they listen,
 yet go on with their own affairs, they
 are masters of tact, and .nay .,s wise
 enough to foresee that the tine naT come when themselves will want @ favor
 But there are others to whom even a lovely child is a bore. Their best friends bore them more than half the time. These people are in chronic condition of selfshness, and every one
 bOres them who fails to contribute something to their majesties' comfort or happiness. More than half the boros are not bOres at all. In fact we our selves are bOreable-we are hypersensi- tive. We want our friendships to be all receipts and no outgoes; and if a friend insists on our doing a little something for him by way of amusement in return hOPp6 I coT D+ oil ~,~ us, kind reader, at all times. We mean to give and take generally. But we have our times and seasons of being Over-sensitive, when even our dear old mother herself would seem to bore.us.
 q bore yOu," said a shabby gentle man to a young fnancier in the back room of bank some years ago. ''To confess the truth, you do,' replied the young man, smartly. The old man got quietly out of his chair, folded ID his patent, which he had been exhibiting, and politely took his grip-saok and him self off. That patent has now become worth it's millions, and the smart young financier is now at work as clerk in the office of the great company of which the old inventor is president. Had this financier been less nervous or sensitive he might not have so missed his fortune.
 It is hardly safe to tell any decent man that he bOres you. The result is stinging, and is rarely forgotten. In fact, 1 think patience to endure being bored, and not show your fret, is one of the happiest qualities of mind for sue cessfully dealing with men.
 Who is bore? The man with hobby The tedious, uninteresting talker. The borrower. The fellow who boasts and tells about himself all the while. The friend who can't keep a good situation six months, and always comes round for new letters of introduction. The in veterate funny fellow, who can never talk sober sense. The hOmelv wOmap who gets too near you when eonversing on her long yarns. The dudish youth who makes long, long call and sits in dumb silence expecting you to do all the entertaining. The man or woman who calls too often. The person who persecutes you with genuinely kind invitations to come and visit him, and will never take no for an answer. The fellow who is always on the contrary side, and fires up with: ''Let us argue the point" The good soul who is always preaching to you that smoking is kill ing you" The curious person who picks and peeps, that he or she may find out a secret that you do not wish to tell. The very, very smart man who always wants to teach you something. The vis- itor on whose face you see cons -antly written, ''What shall we do next to amuse ourselves?' notwithstanding you have just jumped from one thing to an other ever since he or she has been guest in the house. The writer of lengthy letters full of platitudes, which keep you continually in his debt. The man with nothing to do, who drops in on you when you have every thing to do.
 The list is capable of addition. Some persons would bore you who would not bore me. am vexed by some whom you call perfectly delightful" Taste has much to do with the matter, the hidden law of likes and dislfkes. Hence never allow myself to take another persons word for it; I'll wait and see if l am bored. Some men begin by boring you: but they end by endowing ard blessing you. I know a certain college professor who is the most tedious per son in the world for the first half day that you are in his company. But after that he seems to wake up; he lets you into his very soul. His company is the finest delight.
 My experience is that they who talk most about bores are themselves even less careful about trying other peoples patience than ordinary mortals who do not have so much to say on the subject. Good nature, sound health, a manly or womanly heart, full of sympathy for the rest of mankind, is not very often bored. We mortals are all here together on the fOOtstOOl. Take us as we run. we arc not so very different one from another. The earth is filling up and elbows are square miles are being pCpu- lated. We must help and be helped. We must learn to laugh at each others foibles and find the jewel in every heart, for there certainly is one. It is going to be a worse world for the over sensitive soul who is only seeking his own comfort and wants nothing from he rest of us except what he can make contribute to his own happiness.
 Even the most incorrigible bore can be advised. Try it. Tell him kindly hat he is tiresome on certain lines. You are his friend. Get him right and frankly set him right. You will besur-