Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1890-01-02
HERE AND 1HEaE.


the wheel wright should always be
spokesman.
Harrison Hogan OF Indiana, known
locally as the terror of Bull Greek, IL
sbout 70 marry his eighth wife. And yet
there are no end of mild and timid men
who apparently can't get even one wife.
Judge (topolics offioerj- ron snre,
air, thot the prisoner WIS iutoxicated?"
Officer "Am shnre, yer hnnor2 Share
il he nd sphoke through the tiiiphone
the birth nv lin wud ay made the poles
abtaRger"
Pound fnr Pound Noore-Did you
saw 80 much money as ycn thought you
would By spending tue snmner in tho
country2 Po1re (with s nard, bitfes
lauRh} = Save money! Why, man, my
wifa hos put up GO Jars Of preserves !-
Time
At e.aad pqytv-Mr Btco51noa 10
Ml5s Tlmss from the country dRy
have the pleasure % esaotting Won into
iha conservatory r Miss Games (eeEgrIy)
--"C ert4inly, Nj. Hloaloco1 - tell
tha truth, / nm Inf starved. ~ B0st2n
Besc9lb.
Electricity is life,n is fEynrite Fay-
ing with fskirs st agricultural fairs. But
when you touch dead" wire in this
city Won soon como To tho conclusion
that electricity il dasth; or, il vpu DON'T.
ynus frton3a d. for you. Mem York
2fjjRte
''I'd lilo to have the Apae.msntz ocou-
plGl by The Priro" 81 Walas" exclaimed
pnmpoua Eggllsl man nt ons Of the
snnm,r resatta Tin sorry TO say The
priar9 never waited this Motel well,
t'oq, rive o" the roam next to his. y
R6cfs,t'' RU3lst
Az Unhsppy Comparison. Dsu0hter--
''Eut I 1oNi intend 90 marry. | intend
Ia studT . Mother "rhaf's absurd, This
men Hiii think the le:s OF you in tho end.
4 III you knnv much" Dtuehter--"O
nlamms! You alHRvs expect Other men
4 10 No iiSa paua.n- Tint.
] 1t ia seriously related that the Rev.
4 join Far ha1 u Charlotte, n o., wears
a number 81 -ho", which ,eqlires sole
4 ~ inches long and Z inches broad. II
,loas not aeon as though even the most
h.a''hy worm wng,s turn II John should
/ treni on |, - Mo- YAH Taib4ne.
4 Wedding Gusst - Where's the bride
groom r. Rr,tu--tJlat gone out or q
ltttla srrsua." Wedding Guast-"Some,
thing important, | suppose, or he
wouldn't base iatt you so soon after tho
ceremony Brido--"0h, yes, he went
ont 10 saa il apa's wedding check was
t. good. - Rpoth.
Waiter What will you have, sir?
Ceunlrymsn-W Wal, lsmme see Gimme
come larnh and groen peas. (BGwlne
ordsr) 20 lamb aud emerald pills"
"Hor IN 9osh'nighty, vhola iaintl
Durn my snek9, ah'd think would want
pills. Lamme ont. Which is theF nearest
cnt tew Their do.i2 Soat.h- Time.
The smart yonng man who has been
deYotinR bis summer to the young womAC
who now refuses to recognize him sadly
moralizss unnn the ups and downs OF life
laying especial stress upon the fearful
appetite his Hssnd- witch, ma hs calls her
displayed iii tia pursuit of bon, hons
". y. Commercial Ad0erttser.
Transportation Problem. An OK
prersman was busiiy loading his wagon
enc hot noontide, and as he piled III,
bundles high an assistant appeared il
! haste carrying small dog in his ont
Btretchaa bands. "W.ll," sni5 the frs
| man sharply, az he took him, where's III
to 20 7" II don't know" "Don't know?'
j ''ND, don't, nor nobody don't He's ca
I mp his tag Youths Companion,
j a Confusion of Localities. Old Mrs
I FogSrty--"lt's letther Oh hcv from n
j son In Ameriky. Wud yez rade 1t to me
t Tim Burns?n Mr.. Burns (with difficulty
: ---.t1e says, t tn best az my shpeilin'
: Mrs Fogarty, thot he's goin' Z tn islam
4 fer mont" Mrs. Fogarty-"H ivin ar
I Saints be prsissd! Mary Gaffney's Mix
! wor waiter doom they're, an it's nothit
but music m daucin' an shBy-rocket
J from wan wake's ind Z tn other m-PNC6
4 An observing westerner finds that res
o even lenRthens the life of shoes. II
/, used to wear cut four pairs year; bu
) now, by resting them and q monthly az
plicaticn OF yaseine, they last him twic
D that time. He says; ~ give each pal
4 one day of work and two days OF rest an
y this leather has time to regain its elasticit
and stretch out the wrinkles the foot hs
0 made. These wrinkles b come breaks i
8 ths leather when the Shoe is continuousl
0 worn. The vaseline is.better than any o
i for tiue leather.
o Intrepid stanley! Cease to roam
And bring your gray hairs safely home,
/ We're very much obliged to you
4 For proving the Ghaegheelahyuh
:, Flows through the 0olAhkoolah land
= OF Warasuras bloody band.
I And that the roarirg AnlltBZaac
: Flows clear across md HALFWAY back.
o We thought Lake UiaakRhz 1oz9lzsa
d Was larger than 1t seemed 10 bs.
II But you HAYS made these things as clear
a AZ tn ugh We had them all right here.
so there just let the matter stand,
. And cease to live on hope and sand.
u You've done real we'll for beginner,
:, Come home and eat a Christmas dinner
q Chicago Herald,
!. The Herald this morniug startled Il
y Greeks who read its account of the roy
II wedding ct Athens, with the profour
remark: "Ba7ilikos gRmos hugeia
eptughia els TO nearon zangos.n There
not seintilla of truth in this, ami
N there wers can tails giossais ton anthrupC
lalo ksi ton aRgeiop, agapen dc me ech
RagonS chakos echon o kumbalC
q. alaiaznn. Tbs only way in whioh Il
IA Herd d can possibly defend the peculi
i. ptediGnment IN which it has placed itse
h is by directing the attention of its reade
10 TO TIE following exhorfation; "Hostt
IN adaiphoi mon, zeloute to propheteneir
ksi to la,sin m scsuete glossais. ~.
a C0m4.r1@l .idgerttser.
ID II making huas proof before tho Unite
States tsud Office Judge Gniebsrd
i. Weita Wuila nsasily HBEs " Have you
4. famiiS?' Most Of them Auswer in Che O
n iirmatiye, but the other day he got no
OF man who had tina biggsst family {
racord. Have yon fatnil5?" said Il
judge as he pulled down his vest. "Ye
IL bir, said the man, somewhat confuse
"Whst does it consist OF" ooniluuad n!