Baxter Springs news. [volume] (Baxter Springs, Kan.) 1882-1919, 1890-08-09
COURTESY SELF TAUGHT.
Bill Nye Gives Pointers on Funeral and
Other Etiquette.
Copyright by Edgar ". Nye.


Copyright by Edgar W. Nye.
A recent work on how TO conduct
ones self in good society has escaped
from the press within the past month
and is now temporarily engaged in ly'
ing before me. Every little while some
self made man gets new fountain per
and writes book OH how to coruscate
IN good form. No one can light up the
gloom of social ignorance like the ar.
chitect who has carved out his own
fortune, and spattered the gloom and
gravy thereof all along down the cor
ridors of time. Give me the self pois-
cd and self appointed studenticket who
has won his way unaided from the
counting room of the livery stable TO
the proud and dizzy height of "caller
of" at q catch. as-catch-cah and Greco
Roman hop for incontrovertible and
seek -no-further advice OH how to be-
have. lie Is the man who generally
thinks that good writer is man who
has won his fame in that direction by
lis good penmanship. He seems to
think that good writing implies fe-
verish and delirious display of orna-
mental swans and bad spelling. and
that powerful writing is produced by
bearing Oh q little harder than is ones
wont.
In short, he is, as general thing
and by general concession, the ass de
luxe of the century he disiigures, the
artificial, veneered gentleman who,
living, lectures his betlers, and dying
he and his whiskers together-gocs to
his reward just as the Odor of scorch-
ing wooden and hot air dye is waited
to us across the bourne OF that country
where round trip tickets are unknown
and perpetual siop.over privileges are
accorded. In his life he dstracts at
tention from his own glazing short
ages by lecturing Others, and in death
he wears very toothsome, artificial
smile and a costume which does not
extend below the plate glass peep hole
of his narrow house. In his home pa
per on the next week appears the fol-
lowing:
| CARD.
I desire TO thank the friends and
neighbors most heartily in this man
ncr for their united aid and co-opera-
ton during the illness and death Of my
recent husband, who escaped from me
by the hand of death on Friday last
while we were eating breakfast. To
the friends, both one and all, who
thus contributed so willingly toward
making the last moments aud funeral
Of my husband bowling success, |
desire TO be remembered most kindly,
hoping that these few lines may find
them enjoying the same blessing. l
bow to the cruel stroke. l also have
good mich COW and roam geiding
horse rising of eight years old which !
will sell cheap OH the premises. God
moves in mysterious way his Won
ders to perform. He plants his foot
steps in the sea and rides upon the
storm. Also 4 black and white shote
very low. Yours truly,
wilt HANNAH RosEoLA PEETY.
Much space is given in this book TO
the question whether or not it is good
form to leave the teaspoon in the cup
whilst encompassing its contents or
when passing it back to get it replen-
ished. 1t is the belief among the old
Presbyterians and Wings, l think,
that the spoon should remainin an up
right position in the cup, whilst the
modern or Mckee dynasty holds that
the spoon should be laid in the saucer
or concealed about the person whilst
slipping the coffee. To this the Cal
whistle gentlemen who still adhere TO
to the fly front pants and infant dam
nation reply that according to good
usage the laying down of the spoon
implies dissatisfaction with the hand
and call for a new deal. However
this may be, the manual above refer
red to does not straighten the matter
up at all, but says that the author
himself adheres to the custom of leav-
ing the spoon in the cup. This, /
think, will have great deal TO do
with breaking up the practice.
A gentleman making formal call
in the morning should retain his hat
in his hand. He may safely leave his
overcoat or dog in the hall, but he
must retain his hat, as it means that
the call is a formal one, and not with
a view to matrimony. The name of
the maker on the inside of the hat also
furnishes good reading matter when
one has said all one has to say, and is
just recovering from the facilitating
effects of a great thought. Families in
deep mourning should use black fire.
crackers on the Fourth of July as far
south as Bleeckcr street.
When calling oil any one at hotel,
send up your card and wait for a re-
ply. If the servant returns with the
reply that the gentleman is not in, do
not lose vour temper, or throw rub