Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1890-11-20
SINGLE TAX DEPARTMENT.
THE DEVIL TO PAY.


The King was puzzled. for his treas
| ury was empty. and he knew not how to
| fill it While he pondered this mighty
question of state, the devil came to him,
! not in a dream, but in sober earnest
And the devil, as is his habit, went at
once to business.
You are in trouble, sir" said he to
the King; shall I helpyou out of it?"
No, thank you." replied the King.
you charge too much for your help. ]
do not forget that my father is still
working out a debt to you which was
beyond all proportion to your service"
Yes" said the devil Il did charge
the old man about all the traffic would
bear; but have tried to be considerate,
and although he is still working out the
debt, let me assure you that his position
is tie most comfortable, in winter. in
all my dominions- But that is beside
the question. Your treasury is empty, and
can fill it. I will make no conditions.
You may command me freely. What
say you?"
And has the devil turned saintT' the
King inquired
Not by a long shot shall get my
pay; though not from you, from your
subjects
My subjects be -"
Stop interrupted the devil. that
sentiment IS not original with you. 1t
is the motto OF my kingdom. and l won't
punity. Come. what do you say; shall
tell you how to fill your treasury"
Yes" the King whispered.
Then, listen. All your subjects have
plenty, have they not?"
They have There is not poor man
in my kingdom, except myself"
How do they get it?''
They work for it."
why do you allow them to work?'
1T is the command OF God -'
''Silence.' the devil screamed, his face
purple with rage and his tail flashing the
floor of the palace till the air was laden
with sparks.
We'll. them gasped the frightened
king. they would starve if I stopped
them, and what good would that do
me?"
1T would do you no good if they
starved" the devil answered, as he gath
cred his tail under his left arm and
opened tbe'window TO let out the sitting
fumes. But it would do you some good
to charge them for working, wouldn't
it? They would pay rather than starve.
eh?"
Good idea!' exclaimed the king.
Il thought so" said the devil Now,
suppose you issue a proclamation that
no one may work without a royal char
ter
Yes" the king interrupted, inpa-
tiently.
And then suppose you sell charters to
one man to work in a certain territory
and to another man to work in another
territory, and SO on"
YES"
And suppose you allow the owners of
these charters to farm out the privileges
under them
Yes
And suppose you issue no Charters
at all for some of the best territory;
don't you see that you will get p lot of
ready money from the sale of charters
and have permanent income from the
territory reserved, and be favored with
a wealthy leisure class in whose society
you may enjoy yourself?
''Capital!" exclaimed the King, but
before the word was out of his mouth
the devil had vanished.
The King lost no time. Having is
sued his proclamation forbidding his be-
loved subjects to weary themselves with
work, he sent for his encouragement
and ordered that functionary, on the ba-
sis of a contingent fee, to draft form
of charter. It read In substance like
this: Be it known that his pious and
gracious majesty. Impecunious X. hav-
ing from love of his faithful subjects
forbidden them to work without his
command, does now, by these presents,
confer upon his well-beloved By!ighote,
lord of Towmaytokahn hill, his heirs
and assigns forever, full power and au-
thority to permit the good people of all
that territory known as Quad. and
bounded, etc, etc, etc, to work or not
to work. as to him may seem best, and
on such terms as to him may seem just.
Signed, sealed, ETC., etc, etc.
The proclamation caused an uproar
among the people, for the seeding season
vas just opening, Int when Lord Ryli-
ghote appeared with his charter in Quad,
quiet was restored and terms were made
Il will give SO much year to be allowed
TO work.. said one. and Il will give so
mucii." said another. And in this way
it went. Until Lord Bylighote had ar
ranged with all the p6opAe in his terri
tory. And while Lord BFlighote was
adjusting things in Quad. Lord This and
Lord That and Lord Tcther were doing
the same in Guam and Quinn and CURL |
And SO it was that the Kings treasury
was full from the sale Of charters. and |
the Lords, instead Of working as they |
used to do, lived on what the people |
paid them for the privilege Of being al |
lowed to work, while the Attorney GEN
erals contingent fee was big enough to |
make a shyster respectable. And be-
tween them the King. the Lords and the
General enjoyed their leisure
amazingly.
But as the Kings subjects increased
great many could not buy the right 10
work and had to hire themselves to
those who could. and many of these |
could not find men to hire them. and
many more found it easier to follow the
example of the Kings and lords and live
IN plumber than either to buy the right
10 work Or to hire themselves out. And
{ came about that there were paupers
n the kingdom, which was something
novel, since the King had Heretofore
2een the only pauper; and there were
,riminals there. which was also novel.
or when nobody had to pay 10 be allow
d TO work, and everybody got rich by