davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
The Name Came Natural.

Names are sometimes changed in
.lneer ways. Anew years ago a Bohc-
mian came into a Western town and
proceeded to work at anything he
could find to do. Shortly after his
arrival the local paper, partly out Of
iun and partly out OF u desire to help
him, printed this p ,ra9faph about
him: A foreign gentleman with an
struck town. He is proving to be
such IL good citizen in every respect
that we are disposed to relieve him
Of Ills incubus ofa name, and we
therefore salute him as john Smith,"
When the Bohemian heard OF the
paragraph he was much pleased and
Immediately adopted the new name
and Mr.. John Smith is now one of
the leading citizen OF the town.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
Motive Power of the World.

Four-tilths OF the engines now
working in the world have been con-
structed during the last twcnty five
years. Franco owns 1880 sta.
tionnry engines, 1000 locomotive
and $50 steamboat engines. Gers
many has 10000 locomotives OF oil
kinds, $4,000 stationary engines
md boilers and 100 ship and
steamboat engines. Austria has 49,
600 stationary engines and $500
locomotives.
The force equivalent to the work
ing power steam engines represent:
In the United States, 1900, 900
horse power; in England, 1000, 900
horse power; in Austrin, 1900, 200
horse power, and in Germany, a.
100000 horse power. In these fig.
ures the motive power of the locomo-
tive engines is not included, whose
number in all the world at the be-
ginning of 1890 was 1O5, 900, repre-
senting n total ofbetween 5000, 600
and 100000 horse power; for the
sake OF convenience we will say
5000, OOOhorse power, which, added
to the other powers enumerated
above, gives lis u total of49, 900, 900
horse power for the world.-St. Louis
Republic.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
Photographs Of a spook,

A strange case ofspirit photogra-
ply occurred few days ago in Los
Angeles. The lady who was the
chief actor will not consent to the
use Of her name, but there isno ques.
ton OF the reality of the event, and
1t is made nll the stronger by tho
fact that both she and the photogra.
pl'er are skeptics OF spiritualism.
She took her position in the gallery,
and the photographer threw his
cloth over his head TO arrange the
locus, when, with an exclamation of
fright, his head bobbcd suddenly out
from beneath its covering and he
stared ut tho lady.
"Did any one pass behind you just
then?"
why, certainly not" she answer
ed.
He then took the picture and went
into tho dirk room withit. Hecame
bounding out in u few moments, aud
with n white faco and strange man.
Her snid she must sit agnin. She
complied, and again when l,e pro-
ceeded to adjust the lenses he could
not restrain his terror. His face be-
came headed with "a cold pcrspira.
ton, his hands trembled 80 that he
could hardly proceed with the work.
Five times did he take the lady's
picture, refusing to give her any en-
PLANTATION of his strange behavior.
At last he told her she would have
to go to some other place-he could
not tnke her picture satisfactorily.
Then she insisted on an explanation.
He refused for a long time, but at
Inst he brought her five plates from
the dark room. In each of them by
her side, dressed in grave clothes,
with outstrctched arm and beckon-
ing finger, stood the figure of u per-
son who had been dear to her, but
who had recently died. The lady
nearly fainted and denounced tile
thing rs trick, hut was soon con-
WINGED if there was fraud the photo.
grupher didnot know it. The pho.
tographer developed the plates, and
the portraits of the living and the
dead are exact and startling.
The lady is not supcrstitious; but
tho ineNplicable affair has worn on
her nerves so us to render her seri-
ously ill.-Cor. st. Louis Globe-Dem-
Ocrat.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
Old Time Moral Laws,

This was q period when the SO call
ed "bluc laws" were most rigorous
ly enforced, not only in Connecticut,
with which tradition associates
them, but in Massachusetts. In the
former colony no food or lodging
could be given to Quaker, Auamite
or other hereto. No one could run
on the Sabbath day or walk in his
garden or else where, except reverent.
ly to and from meeting. No one
could travel, cook victuals, make
beds, sweep house, cut hair or shave
OIL the Sabbath day. No woman
could kiss her child on Sabbath or
fasting day. Whoever brought
cards into the colony paid fine OF
G5.
No one could read the Book oil
Common Prayer, keep Christmas or
saints days, make minced pies,
dance, play cards or play on any in
strument OF music except the trum-
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
Infant Depravity.

Uncle Peter, tho last man thai
worked here admitted that he drank
intoxicatingliquor. Now, you don't,
do you?
eyes, mum, / does sometimes.
'Don't you know that thous ands
ofhomcs have been broken up by it
and that it kills hundreds of thou
sands every year?"
"Nebbcr had that effeck on me,
num-"
Haven't you any children?" said
the lady, trying to strike u tender
chord.
Use got a boy"
''Does he drink"
"ies, mum; he jes' began to drink
like fish,"
"rhis is awful! Sec what an OK.
ample you have been for own your
son, and now lie is on the downward
path. How old is lie? Can't he be
wenned from
"Dat's jess exactly what we're dom
wild him. mum. DE boy is toahtcen-
months old"
Uncle Peter finished his work in
peace.-Boston Transcript.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19

ssSSAS SSsSs y
Among the pithy sayings OF u we'll
known German philosopher and read :
er occurs the following: "Sign no
paper without reading it." In these
days ofeducation, enlightenmenta and
progress, such acaution would hard.
~ seem necessary to any person in
the full possession of his faculties;
yet it is astonishing how many peo-
pie there IRE, including good bust.
ness men, who attach their sigma
lures to papers or documents whose
contents may have serious bearing
upon themselves or their affairs.
with scarcely n glance at their con-
tents. Carelessness in failing to ac-
quaint themselves with the contents
Of q paper before signing it has
worked incalculable harm to thou
sands OF well-intentioned people. 1t
is good thing, therefore, to bear
in mind continuously the above quo.
tation, particularly with respect to
such papers IN express orimply any
thing in the nature ofa contract or
legal obligation.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19

to it, could take tobacco without n
physicians certificate. No one could
take it publiclyin the street or in the
the fields or woods, except on n
journey of ten miles. Nor could any
one take it in any house in his own
town with more than one other per-
son taking it at the same time. This
last injunction was leveled at the
so-callcd tobacco parliamcnts. /"
About 1915 the Massachusetts mag
istrates were greatly troubled that
the people would tell lies.-Weeden's
"First One Hundred Years."
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
Misplaced Zeal.

"And, fellow-citizens," continued
the political orator, "this is the
party of the people! Thisis the clean,
honorable party! Where, ask you,
where are dishonesty, corruption,
fraud, rottenness, blackguardism,
and the scum of politics to be
found?"
CLEAR, hear, hear, hearl" cried an
enthusiastic man.
"Not by a long chalk!" said the
orator. "There's none of it here.
It's all in the other party! Chuck the
traitor Quit"
And he was thrown out.-Boston
Traveller.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
Ups and Downs Of City Life.

The "New York Witness" says that
a merchant who advertised for an
experienced clerk at n salary OF $12.-
90 per week, received 200 answers
from men who had held good posi-.
tions, and were now so reduced that
they were glad to accept any place
in which they could earn a fair liv-
ing. This illustrates the ups and
downs, and particularly the clowns"
of city life. The percentage OF fail
ures in business life is astounding
and the misery and poverty that
results IRE almost beyond belief.
Such suffering and privations seldom
come to country homes. Whatever
else of hardship and hard work those
who live in the country IRE called
on to endure, they have enough to
eat and generally enough to wear,
and never know what it is to seek
day after day for opportunity to
work and earn IL living.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19

Prominent Clcrgymcn, Physicians, and all
classes of citizens are unanimous in the in.
dorsrment of Salvation Oil, the great cure
for rheumatism. Price only % cents bot.
tie. At all Druggists
Young ladies', on the eve of marriage, now
give 'spinstcr dinners" at which female
friends only are entertained. They are nj
lowed to talk ofevery thing. and never fnil
to mention the numerous curative benefit \
of DIR. Bulls Cough Syrup that cures all
cough, cold, bronchitis, Group, aud sore
throat.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
The Paris Bull Ring.

The arena of the Rue Pergolese,
Paris, where bull fights take place
every Sunday. and Wednesday, was
several days ago the scene OF an ac-
rilent which will probably prove TO-
tai. 1t was recently thought that
greater interest would be given to
the spectacle Ivy the addition of ne
groes stimulating the bull with
pointed cudgels during the fight.
One OF these men was SO seriously
gored l.y an Infatuated bull that he
was carried out of the arena and
conveyed to his lodgings.-Pall Mall
Gazette.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
Why Banks Don't Want to
Take Gold.

"Do you know that gold is the
most unwieldly of all the different
kinds of money now in circulation?"
said prominent banker to your
correspondent.
"Why?" was asked.
because tisnot bankable without
care!ul scrutiny"
GLOW is that"
"Simply this: take grcenback, a
silver certificate, n gold certificate
or n national bank note to your
bank, and it is received and placed
to yonr credit without n moments
delay. Not SO with gold. A few
days ago n gentleman brought to
our bnnk upward of $4,000 in gold
OF different denominations. and was
much provoked because we would
not receive it forthwith, and give
him credit with the amount the face
OF the coin represented. This we
could not do, because the law re-
quires that gold shall be redeemed
only Mt it's actual value. Coins car
ried in the pocket for any length of
time naturally lose something in
weight by abrasion, probably but u
fractional part of e cent on n 1O-dol-
lar piece, but it is a loss, nevertlle.
less, and therefore bankers cannot
give credit for gold deposits until
the coin shall have been weighed.
in the case in point my friend took
his gold to the Treasury Depart
ment and was compelled to wait
there nearly an hour before he coul,!
get notes for it. Every coin had to
be passed through the scales, and
after the weighing process had been
completed, three coins, two fivc-dol.
lar pieces and one 1O-dollar piece
were returned to him short in weight.
Before returning short-wcight coins
the department stamps on the face
of each n cross. The owner is left to
either send the coins to the United
States mint for redemption or to
again put them in circulation.
Eventually the coins with crosses on
their faces will go to the Mint and
be redeemed at their actual value.
In many instances there may not he
more than several cents shortage on
$50 worth of coin. Business men,
however, object to the inconvenience,
and get rid Of their gold as fast az
possible. "-1ndianapolis journal.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
How to Give Medicine to a Cat.

A New York gentleman has very
valuable Angola cat, and so fine Il
specimen OF her kind that she is ia
nous in n large circle Of fashionable
folk. She is not rugged in health,
yet she cannot he pursuaded to take
physic. 1t has been put in her milk.
it has been mixed with her meat, it
has been rndely and violently rubbed
in her mouth. but never has she been
deluded .or forced into swallowil g
any OF it. A green Irish girl APP
peared among the household ser
wants. She heard about the failure
to treat the eat. Sure" said she,
give me the medicine and some lard
and I'll warrant she'll he ating all |
can give her." She MIXED the pow
der and thrgreascnnd smcare,l it on
the cats sides. Pussy at once licked
both sides clean and swallowed all
the pllysic. Faith" said the ser,
want girl, Everybody in Ireland
does know how to give medicine to
q cut.-BOstOn Post.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
Good Place for a EIGHT

'Dog fights were very popular in
that town. One particularly lively
party of sports had great luck in
evading the police. They hunted
high and low for them, but never
found them. They don't know to
this day where the fights were held. u
"Isuppose you know. Where were
they held-if there's no harm in tell
ing"
swell, they were held in the cellar
of the barn OF the chief of police
lewiston Journal.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
A Contented Man.

A fnmily by the name of Perkins.
consisting OF the father, his wife and
four children, passed through Atclli-
son bound Tor Brown county, Ills.
The man had lost one eye and the
left arm, the woman was minus the
left arm, one OF the children had but
one leg, another was blind and
one sick. He had 50 in cash. II plug
OF tobacco, a clay pipe, n yellow
dog. and altogether was MS happy
nnd contented as if lie owned half
the state.-Atchiscn (<an. } Cham.
nj on.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
He Spheres,

Persiaage in the Void: "I'm no
coward" said the earth.
NO; but you have two great
fears," observed the Sun holly.
"And they?"
"The henisphere's."
"You've forgotten tho ntmos-
phere." put in the Moon. And the
Comet wagged his tail with Joy
Herald.
This gossip must have been over
heard while "the morning stars were
singing together for jov."
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
Sleptwith a Life Preserver.

Ayoung woma an who was pas
senger with some friends ON one of
the steamers leaving boston for q
Maine city was asked in the morn
ing whether she had II comfortable
night, and she replied that her sleep
was disturbed because she had not
got used to the lite preserver, which
prevented her from getting into an
easy position, says the Chicago Her.
aid.
1t turned out that she llaS
tened 81, one o. Ter body
~: !; ~ J; z
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
Still She CREW old.

Betsy Harper has just died at Ban.
gor. She wore stays in her youth,
slept on q feather bed. nte pork all
her days, drank-strong ten and just
dotted on mince pieNend hot dough.
nuts. and she beat oGD>all the health
eranks by living to the ~e of 1O1.-
Springfield { lass. Hon tead. =,
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
Got What He Needed,

A young medical student walked
into the Old Book store, and said:
81 want to look ut q work on anat-
omy." II regret to say" replied
Mr.. Burke, "that I have only one
book on that subject" "What's
that" "Burton's Anatomy OF
Melancholy" and lie showed him
the volume. The young man turned
the leaves mechanically a few seconds,
said it would do, paid for the book
and walked out.-Atlanta Journal.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
An Absent-Minded Maine Man

An Absent-Minded Maine Man
kenneke journal.
Along in the fall, when lie saw the
neighbors digging their potatoes, lie
took his hoes put some baskets into
the cart, and with his boy, drove the
team across the pasture to Il back
field. Opening the bars the boy
drove the cart in the field, when the
furmer stepped out few rods from
the fence, looked about him, gazed
across the field up and down. and
seeing no signs of potatoes, said to
himself:
Swell, I declare, l Thought 1 had
some potatoes here, but l guess
forgot to plant 'em-so did"
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19

beginning Saturday. December goth, and
continuing every Saturday evening until
further notice, The burlington" will run u
through Pullman Sleeper from St. Paul and
Minneapolis to Hot Springs. Arkansas.
Everybody knows about tho Hot Springs
aud every body WHO wants to go there should
rrrollert that 1.-The burlington" is the only
road by which YOU cnn reach the Springs
from the Northwest without change Of cars.
When YOU make arrangements to visit
Hot Springs. therefore, buy your ticket via
The Burlington" Fortickets, reservation in
Hot Springs Sleeper and further Information,
apply to the local agent or write to w. j.
I. Kenyon. GEM Pass Agent, Z. B.& N. H. r..
st. Paul, MINI.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
Her woman's WIN pefeated
Him


A theatrical man tells the following
story. He did not attempt to vouch
for its truth, 90 the writer does not,
merely giving it here for what It 10
worth az an illustration OF "a woman's
will. The man who told the story al.
80 disclosed then ames Of Those about
whom it is related, but owing to the
doubt about the absolute veracity Of
the tail it would not be fair to mention
the names. Suffice it to say that
one was an actor and the other an
actress, and both very we'll known
to the public. So coll the actor Y,
because that is about rs far rs one
can get from his name, and the nc
tress Miss A., because her name
is nothing like that either.
Miss A. besides being perhaps
the most pro minent chararter in the
play was also the stage manager, and
it was she who regulated MIR. Y-'s
salary.
Now Y hadlong contended that
his salary was not one-half what it
should be, and Miss A. declared
rs. firmly that this was neither here
nor there, for the salary would re-
main unchanged. This condition of
affairs did not make the two love
each other as good christians are ex-
pected to do. Such scenes as these
(behind the flies, of coursel. BECAME
frequent:
".When are you going to raise my
salary?"
Clever"
"All right, then. 1 leave you to.
morrow"
every well, why don't you?'
Or the war might be varied to this
form:
his week 2"
:No"
Next week."
"No."
"When?"
t'Never."
That determined "never'' was q
disngreeab BILE check to the argument.
Finally y worked out a sub-plot
in the play. In one act he, the noble
hero, Carried Miss A from top
story to the ground down n ladder.
One night when this scene came on
he stepped upon the round OF the Ind
der us usual. holding in his arms his
fair burden. But instead of coming
down quickly as usual, rs q vigor-
GUS, invincible hero should, he
stopped.
Now" he whispered in her ear,
"Never."
s.Raise my salnry or drop you."
Here was crisis. Two things were
in danger-the success of the scene
and the actress bones.
raise my salary or drop you."
The house" was whiting. Miss A
closed her eyes.
"Never!" she said, and lie carried
her safely down the ladder.-New
York Tribune.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
Salt Rheunn
On Head, Face and Neok-A Ch,ld's sur
ferlngs Relieved.

On Head, Face and Nock-A Chtld's Suf
ferlngs Relieved.
"when my little boy was only few months
old. eczema. or salt rheum. appeared on his face.
head and neck. 1t also came out on his body. but
not SO severe as on and about his head. Blotches
and pmples would come out thlckiy. break and
discharge thin watery fluid. and then scales
would form. titched intensely. and caused
= .e little fellow much suffering for years. wo
consulted leading physlcians but he did not seem
to get any better. Then. about u year ago. We
decided to give him Hoods Sarsaparilla. and MS
the result Of fair trial he IL now entirely well.
his skin being smooth and fair rs can be. We
also used Hoods Olive Ointment and found 1t ex-
cellent as an Outwsrd application" n. +.
GoOHiN. Furniture Dealer. Lowell, Mass.
n. u. II you have decided tobuy Hoods Sarsa'
paria do not be induced to take nny other.
Hoods Sarsaparilla
soldby all druggista 81 ak for$5. Prepared only
by c. /. HOOD 4 co. Lowell. Mass.
100 Doses One Dollar.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19

vagantly joyous; but the next day
oh +! but he is surly and grim, his
stomach and liver are sluggish, he is
morosc, Respondent and /" out of
sorts" generally. But he may get
a prompt return for his money by
purchasing DR.. Picrce's Pleasant
Pellets.
There's nothing like them. They
are tiny Liver Pills, sugar-coated,
but thorough in results. One Pellet
is laxative, three to four cathartic.
For Indigestion, Biliousness, and
all arrangements of the Stomach,
Liver and Bowels, they work like a
charm, and you get a lasting benefit
and permanent cure.
They're the cheapest Pill, because
cafe and sure, while the manufact-
urers guarantee they'll give satisfac-
ton, or your money is returned!
You only pay for the good you
get. Can you ask more?
What's the use! suffering any
more from those dizzy spells, the
headaches and all make the attack
yourself, with cnc or two of these
little, Sugar-coatcd Pellets, and they
will do the rest. They are a perfect
vest-pocket remedy. Purely vege.
table and perfectly harmless. By
druggists IS cents . vial
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19

When Baby was sick, We gave her castoria,
When she was q Child, she cried for Castoria,
When she became Miss. she chung to Castoria,
When she had Children, she gave them Castori,
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19

There IRE knavcs now and then met with
who represent certain local bittcrs and pos
"nnus stimuli us identical with Or possessing
properties akin to those OF Hostetter's Stom.
nch Bitiors. These scamps only succeed in
foisting their trashy compounds upon pco.
which il rs much their opposite as day ia to
night. Ask and take no substitute for tile
grand remedy for malaria, dyspepsia, consti.
patton, rheumatism and kidney trouble.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19

GARFIELD TEA; harmless herbs, nets on
liver. kidneys md bowels, creates IN uppe
lite, cures dyspepsia and constipation.
\ red tomato in cut glass makes an odd
ink bottle.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19

CouGns AND CoLDs. Those who are suffer.
ing from Coughs Colds. Sore Throat, etc,
should try BRowS's BRONCHIAL TRocHEs.
Sold only in boxes
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1890-12-19
ONE ENJOYS

oNH HNJo4S
Both the method and results when
Syrup of Figs is taken; it is pleasant
and refreshing to the taste, and acts
gently yet promptly OH the Kidneys,
Liver and Bowels, cleanses the sys.
tenn efiectually, dispels colds, head.
aches and fevers and cures habitual
constipation. Syrup of Figs is the
only remedy Of lis kind ever pro-
duced, pleasing to the taste and &C.
ceptable to tile stomach, prompt in
its action and truly beneficial in its
effects, prepared only from the most
healthy and agreeable substances, its
many excellent qualities commend it
to all and have made it the most
popular remedy known.
Syrup of Figs is for sale in 800
and 81 bottles by all leading drug.
gists. Any reliable druggist who
may not have it OH hand will pro.
cure it promptly for any one who
wishes to try it. Do not accept any
substitute.
CALIFORNIA Flc syrup co.
SAY FRANCISCO. cal.
LOUISVILLE. kE REW YORK. n.y.