The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1890-01-18
WIT AND HUMOR.

orleans Ptcuyune.
The man who wears his heart on hi
sleeve does not do it in order to bea
his way in life. "-Kearney Enterprise,
Mrs. De Style-'.Did your daughte
marry well?" Mrs. De Riche-"Y e.
indeed gas well. ''-New York Week
ly.
Marriage is a partnership for life
We all know who isn't silent part
ner, now, don't we?-S0naerUiHe Jour
nal.
One disagreeable feature about post
age stamps is that they are apt to ge
stuck on themselves. = B'nghd'nto'
Leader.
Some men can get along on their in
diyidual merits, but the oarsman mus
ALWAYS be "a man with pull. -
Puck.
There is a revolution in progress II
Guatemala. At present 1T IS nara .e
tell which side has Guatemalan.-feor'0
transcript.
To the thrifty housewife the whole
yexed color question resolves itself IN
to one thing-.'Will it wash?'-BdIti'
more american.
docs that imported clock of yours
keep timer" mot for any practical
purposes. 1t might for one of Wagner
operas. Puck.
The orderly mother with q walking
baby in the house has place for every
thing-and the baby knows where 1t
lSoneruiNe Journal.
Edison is reported as saying that the
world will soon be some vast ear. :.
Perhaps this is the scientific method OF
calling the world an ass.-Puck.
The law permits man to use his
wife to rob his creditors. Yet III the
face of this it is argued that marriage
is failure -Binghanato1 Herald.
The European Title-''Beg pardon,
but | think I've met you before. Don't
YOU belong to our set?" The American
Dollar-'No; your set belongs to me. .
Boston Times.
sWon at last" he exclaimed trium-
phantly. Eyes, Charlie" said she,
shyly. .'but only on the strict condition,
YOU know, that | am to be the one. y
.S0nerUille Journal.
Ada-'.How is it that Lena is SO pop
ular with the young men, Fanny Why,
She's as homely as a parrot!n Fanny
Yes, Lena is homely; but you see,
Ada, she has no little brother. Time.
When q couple of emperors embrace
each other, and then run home and
order a hundred thousand new rifles,
it is an earnest of peace that is en-
titled to the respect of the public
Pucf..
Political Gentlemen al
low me to say that in politics, as in
every private affair, every man should
have a mind of his own A Voice
'Are you married." -Kearney Enter
prise,
Teacher-'tCan you tell me, chill
dren, who first discovered the Parthe-
non frieze?n Small Boy reminiscent
ly)-"The kid that has to build the
fires in the mornIn'. st. Paul Pioneer
Press.
Angry Man-"See here, confound
you, | don't propose to have you dun
me for that bill any more" Angry
don't, ehp How're
YOU going to prevent it?" ''By paying
up. '-Binghamton Herald,
She-'sWhy do you look SO unhappy,
George? Don't you know we are one
now?" He-"Yes, I've heard that be-
fore, but when it comes to paying the
hotel bill the landlord doesn't seem to
think so."-LOhd0n Iid-Bits.
Miss Twelfthseason Speaking of her
Iiance) And dear George is such
lover of antiquities!'' Miss Feline
Anyone could see that!' And Miss
Feline will not receive an invitation to
lhe wedding.-Nea0 York Sun.
Annabel-"Count, dear, l love to
have you pat my cheek in your true
loving way. 1t seems so restful, too"
Count (sotto voice. Hounds, can 70
girl know l vas re barber in my own
countree. "-Kearaey Enterprise.
Wife-''Ive just found a receipted
hatter's bill in your pocket. / thought
you said you didn't feel able to buy
yourself new silk hat this fall?" Illus
indeed, that was one l
bought to pay debt with. Time.
Poet-"Can you tell me the cause of
these pains have in the legs?n Doc
l ask where you live?n
Poet-''In an attic room, sir" Doc
the pains are room attic.
Five dollars, please. "-NeW IOnI Sun.
Cumso-"I see that Punch prints
note stating that Mrs. Guy was not the
author Of its Don't advice to those
about to marry" Fangle-"'The cor
rection was unnecessary. No woman
ever gave such advice. '-Ne,0 York
San.
Irate Politician-"Look here, you
published lie about me this morning
an infamous lie. / won't stand it."
Serene Editor-''But just think where
you would be if we were to publish
the truth about you. "-Terre Hdute Er-
press.
Miss Snapper-"Stop the car!
won't ride if can't have seatm The
conductor with an air of gentle re-
have to stand up all day,
ma'am!' Eyes, but you don't have
to pay five cents trip for it. boston
Times.
Mrs. McSwillem-'I should think
you'd have more self-respect than to
drink the way you do" Mr.. McSwil-
lem" Self-r'spect m dear? I'm sho
full self-rspect, M dear, that l enter
every shloon by back door. "-New
York Weekly.
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. board do you pay
at your new placer" Yabsley-"Three
dollars a week" Wickwire You
must get rather simple fare for that
low price," Yabsley-"O, no; it's