Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1890-02-02

| THE great army Of borrowers is not made up
entirely of those ''who walk, by blazes"-the
| gentry "who ride in chaises" are sometimes as
great adopts in negotiating loans as the Celtic
gentlewoman who asks her neighbor to lend her
the loan of gridiron.
Once it was my fortune to live in little vii
lage near New York City and still nearer the
romantic neighborhood which the glorious
Hudson and the beautiful memories of Wash
| ington Irving make one of the Ioveliest spots
on this earth. We occupied one of group of
half a dozen villas and our next door neighbor
was an old soldier; jolly old fellow, brave as a
| lion doubt not, a splendid story teller but an
| incorrigible borrower. He had an income
| ample for all his needs, but he was always bor-
rowing. His wife, an angular lady who wore
| girls hats, had much sweetness of manner and
a temper and tongue easily equal to any emer-
gency. She was also a borrower from way
| back
One summer night as we were all enjoying
| the cool air from the river on the porch mes
senger from our friend the Major appeared
with request that we would lend him several
packs of cards, as some people from the city
had droDped in upon him unexpectedly. The
cards were sent over. In five minutes the mes
| senger returned with request for a card table.
| The table was lent. At regular intervals of
about 10 minutes for two hours that messenger
a small housemaid, returned, each time with
| new request. Teaspoons, cake, candles were
asked for in turn. Then the emissary announced
that the visitors had decided to stay all night
and Mrs. Major D. would be 80 much obliged
if we would lend her some bedclothes and two
pillows. The lady who presided over our house.
hold was most good-natured soul. She lent
everything that was wanted.
About midnight she came upon her husband
reading in the library. "Why don't you go to
bed, Charles?" she said.
~ can't go to bed; Major DIN want to
borrow my bed, and don't want to have to get
up and dress"
IT was this same military hero or rather his
wife. who sent over one morning before
breakfast to borrow a griddle greaser. Do you
know what griddle greaser is2 1t is piece Of
fat skin from ham, used for greasing the
grlddle on which the buckwheat cakes are to
be baked. The cook remitsed the griddle
greaser, saying to the colored boy who brought
the request: "Tell your missus that it's gift,
not loan"
Another housekeeper of my acquaintance,
lent an apple butter stirrer-a weapon greatly
in request in the fall-to woman worth a
million dollars at least. The latter not only
failed to return the stirrer but when the owner
asked for it the following year only consented
to loan tito her.
IT sounds queer to hear of anyone playing
practical jokes staid Mary Anderson,
but ]. n. Rowe, the actor of this city, SAYS that
he did and that she liked Joke herself years
ago. Said Mr.. Rowe: MARY Anderson in the
summer OF 1876. her first season on the stage,
came to Baltimore Nd, under John T. Ford's
management and played three weeks en-
gagement between Baltimore, Washington and
Cumberland. Miss Anderson used to be very
fond of 'guying' and candy. In Romeo and
Juliet in the scene with FTiGr Laurence,
which 1 had to play, she would deliberately
walk down the stage with her back to the
audience and make faces at me during the
FFidr's long speeches. This was all done in
good humor, but it is no small task to wrestle
with the FTiGT's very hard lines and have Juliet
make faces at you. So 1 was bound to have
revenge. I was very fond of spring onions,
Mary Anderson was not-at least she did not
like their odor, and knew it.
$50 one night in Cumberland we were playing
'Evadne.' My scenes as L1GdoUico were
mostly with her, so took an extra share of on
ions that day, and smoked a dressing-room pipe
to back it up and gave her the full benefit of it
when could. 1t is hardly necessary to say it
was too much for her. She said nothing to me,
but the next day her stepfather, Dr. Griffin,
came to me and asked me if 1 wouldn't stop. 1
said would. coEditionally-if she would let up
making faces and chewing candy.
John W. Morton, who was in the company
at the time, was heartless enough to christen
her Long Mary but doubt if she ever knew
where the name came FROM"
*4*
a REPUTABLE citizen of Pittsburg tells me
that when he was in New York week or
two ago he saw on Broadway man who hob
bled along on two wooden legs, while with his
left hand-his right was gone-he turned the
crank of barrel organ. The sight touched
my friends heart, and he gave the man a
quarter, asking at the same time: "How's busi-
nessP"
The mendicant looked at the quarter, and
then at his two wooden stumps before he re-
piled: II can't kick, sirP'
HEPBURN JOHNS