The daily critic., 1890-12-12
TALE Tub
How "Uncle Jerry" Rusk Vow rakes
HIS Daily Pinnre.

How "Unole Jerry" RusE Vow raEes
HIS Daily Plunge.
Uncle jerry Ruek. the palriarchal.
/ looking Secretary Of Agriculture. is q
1 great believer ia cleanliness combined
with personal comfort in attaining that
desirable end. "Uncle Jerrv" is al.
/ ways independent and fre0ueotlv ORIG.
| maj aud unconventional I'm his wave
/ as The following DER true and no,
/ twice tOld' tale will attest.
Since Secretary Rusk has taken un
/ his quarters in Washington he has de.
I cided in bis own mind that IL is neither
| comfortable nor dieuifed for the frsi
I Secretary Of Agriculture the Itnifsd
Sihtes has ever had 10 be shaved In n
public barber shop, where tho barber
would tell him all about crops and
ihings, or even TO waste any part of his
oilicial lie ia the bathroom of his own
home
lie does not believe in Shawn him.
self. He had TO do that in former and
less prosperous days and acquired a
disiaste FOR The exercise. Neither will
lie trust himself 10 the tender mercies
oil a vale;-that would break him mn
with the farmers Of Wisconsin. who
wouldn't know a valet from a wood
chuck.
Uncle Jerry is possessed Of large
end knowing head, however and it did
not take him long 10 figure out plan
whereby he could accomplish his pur.
pose without great outlay Of capital,
personal or otherwise.
In the eastern end Of the basement of
the Agricultural Department building
Is q cosy, well-ventilated, airy room.
which has in years psst been used as n
laboratory BY the chemical division. IL
hAcks up against the boiler room. and
acquires thereby temperature a. genial
as Uncle Jerry's' temper In this room
ihe august Secretary has had planned.
constructed and built n model bath
room. In one corner is set large and
elongated tub, the dimensions of which
are sufficiently large to receive the Sec.
retary' ample body. Therein he daily
lies at extended length and pondefs /
upon the DEGREES Of fate.
The contrast between HIS Dleasipg I
surroundings as he lies there in thai /
tub filled with tepid waters and the 1
Time when lie was want 10 take his oc.
cesicnal wash all over in the swim.
ming hole IN summer, or in the chilly |
meal room Ia winter, always ickles the
energetic fancy Of the Secretary and
causes him 10 plunge outlike porpoise
ltulay.
Across the -oom, and where the sun.
light streams brightly down, Is a com.
nodious and riChly-upholstered barber's
hair In which the Secretary lolls corn
or'ably while a messenger, employed
" the people Of the United States.
Yields q keen edged razor with skill and
pleasing effect upon the Secretary's /
.enial countenaBco. A tall mirror faces
he chair, into which "Uncle .terrv"
miles self CALCULATIONS.
Life Is short and time Is neetipg. es.
ecialiy With this Administration. ard
ccrciary Busk Is eminently correct anil
Is shaggy head level as a turnpike road
making things pleasant about him ,
hen lac retircs the United States will
W. own the bath tub and tho BARRIERS
lair, and II nerchanco Jerry Slmp
~, the Congrcssman-uleCt from Rangts.
no IS rcputed not 70 wear "sox." be-
mes Secretary In "Uncle .Ierrv'sn
cad. The tub and chair can be slld to
coup Uncle sam ia part And the :
easing memories OF the place would
.ide with Uncle jerry" always. :