The Roanoke times. [volume] (Roanoke, Va.) 1890-1895, 1890-10-03

Fl IN HOT PURSUIT.
Hot darkness, to hound to the gallows
4 foul mnrdercrs, is, thinks tho heroic
4 embryo, the acme Of earthly glory.
Such being tho case, it is not strange
3Ithat so many applications arc received
4 by the detective agencies for positions.
There are scattered through the country
agencies which advertise for mon to do
4 detective work in the counties OF their
#.residonce, and it is this sort of an in
stitution which generally catches the
a Igrangers. Advertisements arc sown
broadcast in tho country papers, and
upon application from an ambitious
youth, he is cheerfully accepted. The
applicant is at once informed by mail of
4 his appointment as detective, and re-
\ quested to advance the sum of five dollars
! as payment for his star, credentials, etc.
This tho future Pinkcrton is ALWAYS
A ready to do, and upon sending in his
4 cash he receives a large glittering tin
star, q beautifully wordcd certificate of
4 appointment, and instructions to lie low
4 and await developments.
The agency, in addition to the above,
generally youchsafcs the information
that an important case is developing in
the new detectives locality which will
/ shortly be placed in his hands. "Only
i this and nothing more" for no matter
how long tho young slcuth waits for
further instructions, they como not. 1t
is straight case of ''soak," sufficient to
cure the detective fever in most cases,
and, as general thing, the victim set
1 ties down to farm life and sets up
country grocery, with nothing to re-
mind him of his youthful folly but his
fading credentials and rusting star. In
some instances, however, the would -bc
4 sleuth makes more systematic effort to
reach tho much to-be desired goal, and
4 makes application in person to the bona
fide agencies in the large cities. Such
applications arc not of rare occurrence
i in tho agencies of Chicago, and many
amusing incidents growing out OF them
can be told.
Tho applicants classified as dime
novel readers arc almost exclusively
fresh from farms or country towns whore
the excessive quiet renders desire for
almost any sort of excitement natural
The youths, for they arc always young,
generally have an exaggerated idea of
the important figure they are to cut in
their new sphere which makes their ig-
norance more laughable than it would
otherwise appear.
Ono Of tho most verdant of these
specimens was MIR. Joel Albatross Rad
kin, Jr., from Switzerland County, Ind,
who not long since applied for posi-
ton at one OF tho prominent detective
agencies of this city. Joel was pict-
ure, chrome, u landscape. He was
built upon that slim, slender plan, which
has been disguised by some inhuman
punstcr as tho ''raillcry of nature" and
was about as inartistic 1t piece of archi-
lecture as one would sec in days Jour
ney. An extremely small head, light
blue eyes, long, pointed nose, shocky
straw-colored hair, wide mouth a form
like clothes-horse, and Joel Albatross
is described. Joel is, in his neirhbor-
hood, accounted a literary phenomenon,
for not only has he read ''heaps and
piles" Of the Seaside Library and other
dark tales, but he has oven, wondrous
to relate, written several Indian stories
and two or three poems, stanza from
one of the latter being. hereby published
as proof of the young mans genius:
" Oh, blest be the Wcst the far away West:
The land OF the sword and guns,
Where the brave heroes the dark robber mows
Down, aEdsalsERthc Injuns."
Such talent could not long remain un-
noticed, and Joel soon became the sage
of his township. But he longed for
more glorious field in which to earn
fame and fortune, and determined to
seek it in our own windy city. Accord
ingly he gathered together what fire.
arms he could scrapeup in the neighbor.
hood and landed in Chicago.
lie Immediately sought outone of tho
agencies here, and firmly grasping tho
old army musllet which he carried on
tered the presence of the supcrintend-
ent.
II want to be detective,' he calmly
announced, ha-thc-villain-still-pu
sues-her expression stealing over his
nohlo countenancc. "I'm. from Indiany,
and amt no slonch of detective, YOU
bet," continued Joel to the superintend-
ent, who stood aghast, gazing at the APP
partition. i've been n modling my cay
reer artcr Deadwood Dick, and am good