The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1890-12-11

HOW IuuCH call SeG 10 40.
Foreign Agitator-"Slave! Slave!
You are only a slave. My mission to
this country is to form an organiza-
ton TO-
American Mechanic-"I can't stop
to talk now. I must get around
with my deposit before the bank
closes" PUCK.
Peculiar Collaterals.
Sam Johnsing-Say, niggah, cam
you lend me two dollahs for few
days?
Uncle Mose-I mout do hit, but
what security am yer gwinter gimme
dat yer don't skedaddle jes as soon
as yer has got de money?
Sam Johnsing-What s'curity! lie
glib you as security my sacred word
of honor as a gennerman and pa
OF ledder britches almos' as good as
new.-Texas Siftings.
Something Unprecedented.
Ethelinda handing her mamma a
letter)-Robert has proposed at
last.
Mamma latter reading it)-You
are mistaken in your belief that Rob-
ert is a college graduate.
Chow do you know, mamma?"
"From the fact that e1 cry word in
his letter is correctly spelled" -
Pittsburg Chronicle.
A Womanly Answer.
Sophomore-I heard one of the
girl undergraduates making a truly
womanly answer the other day.
Junior-Indeed?
Sopomore-Yes; the professor in
astronomy asked her why the earth
goes round the sun.
Junior-what answer did she make?
Sophomore - 'Because." - New
York Sun.
A Young Lady Who Was Posted.
First young lady examining d.
rectory in a drug store )-I cannot
find the name in this directory Ethel.
Second young lady-No? What
shall we do?
First young lady-Let us go to
Hudnut's drug store and examine
their directory. They keep better
stock of everything.-New York
Mercury,
Misunderstood.
West Shore: Deaf old lady Tin
street-car accident): ooh, sir, can
you tell me what has happened?'
Pious gentleman: "Pray calm your
self, madame: remember that a kind
heaven bends over ALL" Deaf old
lady Ito female companion): "Mar-
tina Jane, what's that old fool say
in to me about mems overalls?"
On Business Basis.
"1t was brave act, young man,"
said the grateful father, with deep
feeling. cat the peril otyour life you
rushed into the burning building and
saved my daughter. How can ever
repay you?'
would a couple of dollars be too
much?' suggested the brave rescurer.
New York Mercury.
In Society,".
Observation-Disclosures, what was the
name of the new plant we got from
the florists to-day?"
Mamma-Really, daughter, I don't
know; but I should think you could
find tin the Encyclopedia Botanni-
ca that the bookseller sent up yes.
Observation-Disclosures Star.
| His Advice.
Du Sappy-Ah, doctah, I am aw
fully afwaid that I, aw, might get
poisoned some, aw, day. What
should l, aw, do if 1 accidentally
dwank some wuff on watts?
Doctor-Run out into the yard. .
But, aw, what foah, doncherkno?'
$50 as not to die in the house,
Lawrence American.
His Falling.
"Why don't you join our athleti,
club. The initiation fee is only $1O(
and the monthly dues only $40"
Il am afraid l could never be al
athlete"
"Why not-shortness of breath?'
"Ah, no; merely shortness of funds
Texas Siftings. 49,, "
His Angel Wife,
Wherefore we were married vol
said l was an angel, but you never
say SO now. ..-E.:.. .-
Husband (tenderly)-No, darling
but wish you were one Washing
ton Post.
| Women in the Case.
He-"That man yonder was one,
the wealthiest man in the Mormon
Church,
She-"What broke him?"
He-"A sudden changein fashions.
-Munsey's Weekly.
A Foolish Doctor.
Puck: "a Brooklyn physician ha
failed in business. From wha
r S