The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1890-10-26

OlOcu dlotAtQ 70 WISH I-A~s NC was oSo0-
and his staff have promised. SO far as
possible, to crafty his every wish
The king of Spain is brunette glut-
ton from quite distance up the creek
He founders himself almost every day
and then murmurs because he can con-
tain no more. Els doctors bills, they
say, would buy good COW every year.
he hates books and enjoys nothing but
feeding. He takes no interest In his nice
new clothes. but constantly his ear is
strained to catch the sound of the II
o'clock whistle, which announces that
the hands at the castle have knocked off
for dinner He then blows off the royal
digester to a square meal, to use crude
Americanism.
The king of Dahomey has had both
his own and his wife's relations strained
by France. and war is almost inevitable
He knows also that it will be one of
those disagreeable wars in which he will
have the excitement Of getting some of
his most INDISPENSABLE brains shot out
without the glory of u victory. Though
he may think he is right. and that it IS
better to be right than to be relative
of the executive, he is almost certain to
get done up by France, and go home
carrying his largest brains IN a collar
box.
The king IF Italy formed the foolish
habit Of cutting his hair pompadour
years ago. and now he cannot make it
Glow 5or-n Ovar ooI Ox,ar oo-oi,, ba no q
written to me TO know what he should
do in order to destroy or allay at least
that appearance of surprise which his
erect hair gives him. lie says his life is
imbittered by it, and that if it were not
that he fears that he would brighten the
Seraphim he would willingly blow out
the gas and go home.
Pedro Ii, Of Alcantara, made an assign
ment last year, and putting his throne
out in the carriage house with burlaps
over it he went abroad, telling the rump
senate and house of representatives, to
take their old empire and never to
darken his doors again. When last
heard Of he was preparing a magic Ian
tern slide lecture on blow to Reign
with Least Fatigue, and What Style of
Scepter Is Best Fitted for Indoor Reign
ing"
Leopold II, of Belgium, says that if
he could get tAe same salary from Phil
Armour for sticking hogs that ne does
for reigning over Belgium he would be in
Chicago early in November, when the
great anniversary ard carnival of the
hog assassination of Illinois is at its full
height, and he would have his clothes
sent to him afterward.
Khulaloukcru |, king of Siam, says
that he would rather run a soda fount-
ain than be king. He gets all het up in
the middle of the day, and his throne
fairly aches by o'clock at night.
Muley Hassan, the sultan of Morocco.
is tired and sick of his job, and says that
if he could take a few Of his best wives,
and shotgun, and wall tent, and go
out camping for about eighty-fve years
and let the kickers do the ruling them
selves, he would be willing to do it if he
could do so honorably, bat it's Ike Jay
Gould with his money, he says. The
thing has no doubt made slave of him,
with big iron collar on his neck that
leaves him never day or night, but curses
him even with the fear that he will lose
it, and not only be again poor and
forgotten. but occasionally raked up
as an example and jeered at by the mob.
That is why, as Muley Hassa1 says. q
man frequently cGGgs TO throne that
has big hornets nest in the bag. of it.
He hates to quit, and thus admit That he
was not Indispensable, or give the COM
mon people a chance to say unjust
things of him when he is gone. He is
like the cOlored man who held the bear
by the tail and desired help to let go.
Wales has been very successful in
some ways He has heshed ND first rate,
and has also made a record as the Oldest
prince in England, Ireland or Scotland.
he is looking real rugged, but his figure
reminds one of disabled penchant with
q string around it.
Georgios Ii, king of Greece, is a SOM
nambulist, and hardly night passes
that he does not wander forth and fall
OFF the edge of his kingdom somewhere.
He says if he felt sure that he had made
his calling and election sure he would
not care hew soon the summons came.
He says he is tired reigning over little
clearing hike Greece. where the history
of all the old family business is repeated,