The Iowa plain dealer. [volume] (New Oregon, Howard County, Iowa) 1867-1895, 1890-07-31

1t II worth knowing that SCREW.
hole In wood too largo for the sire OF
screw II il desired 10 use may be plugged
with piece Of cork driven tightly In,
and thereby be made to afford frm
hold for the screw.
Don't despise the Ignorance" Of
our ancestors Of the eighteenth century.
The things We boast Of now will proba-
bly, be as far behind tho tines in 1890 -
the works and ways Of 1890 are to-day.
Modesty is the lesson Of history.-In.
ventive Age.
-Philadelphia boys saturated rag
with gasoline from the public lamps
and by inhaling it in their nostrils be-
came intoxicated. The police detected
them in this new and novel scheme Of
juvenile dissipation and arrests have
followed.
Human nature Is good deal like
dog nature. Whenever some other dog
wants the bone 1t becomes doubly pre-
cious; and when man is about to lose
something upon which he has put slight
value. It's worth goes skyward rapidly.
Rams Horn.
A certain Gascon, boasting OF bis
travels, said that he had seen . church
mile long. Surely, you are mis-
taken" said his auditor. "Yes, and two
miles broad" replied the Gascon; Il
should have leade 1t square II you had
not doubted ne."-London Journal Of
Education.
Pretty women are attractive, pleas
ing, and agreeable to the sight; lively.
graceful, captivating, and beautifully
charming. Handsome women are beau
tifnl, charming, stately, statuesque,
sometimes cold and formal: fascinating,
though often distant. digni6ed and
proud. We like and love pretty women.
Hands me women we admire and wor-
ship.-Omaha Republican.
EDITOR Ito Associate)-"Why did
you accept this Spring poem?" Asso-
ciate-"Well, sir. the blamed poet (for,
who does not tlame him?) walked in
here with that poem in one hand and .
revolver in the other, and said must
take tho poem, or something worse. /
told him didn't wish any thing worse
than the poem, and took that Wcst
Shore.
-"Poe's "Raven"has found counter
part at Gainesville, Fla, where . mon
ster owl has taken up his abode in the
residence Of DR.. Phillips. where he
called very early one morning and
perched himself on top Of the frame Of
picture hanging on the wall. He
looked wise and said nothing except
when poked with stick. At last ac-
counts he still remained guest OF the
family.
--Poots. looking out OF the window Of
his sitting room, saw man ascend the
steps Of his residence whom he didn't
wish to receive. To be candid, hc was
bill collector. Calling the servant,
he babe him tell the man that he was
not at home. did you tell him l was
out?" said Poots, when the servant re.
turned from answering the bell. II did,
sir" ibid he appear to be in doubt
about it?" Not at all, sir: he said II
was lie. Texas Siftings.
Two colored porters in Texas hote
were about to wrestle with the larg.
trunk Of newly arrived stranger, when
one of them took occasion to remark
s'Dis heah trunk weighs at dc loas
twenty-five pounds more den free hun
dred pounds, and I KANT lift no moal
den free hundred pounds" ssNebbe,
mind, SAM" replied the porter; ..jes
catch on and tote free hundred pound
mp de sta's, and I'll be 'sponsible for d,
est."-Tcxas Siftings.
-On drawing net Florida fisher
man succeeded in landing an alligator
and . turtle. The alligator was min.
feet In length, while tho turtle was o
the loggerhead variety, and subsequen
weighing showed 1t to be eighty-fiv.
pounds in weight Tho back of the ALI
gator was broken in two places, Will,
one of the feet was almost severed from
the body.
"A widow Of Miller County. Missouri
who lives on farm, gave another woman
SIS to secure her husband. Tho mar
was secured and warranted all right il
every respect, but the next morning
after the marriage he licked his bride
stole the $50 she had saved up, and IL
the night silently stole away to NJ
Mans Land, and now there are tws
women in that neighborhood who dom,
speak to each other.
p. O. Sullivan, who lives about 81,
miles above the junction Of the Middle
and South Fork Of Boise, on the former
killed black bear with q knife few
days since, says the Boise lIdaho) States
man. He had followed the bear fol
several miles. It laid down beside
rock and Sullivan crept up to it anl
plunged big knife into vital part
George Alexander. who is q neighbo
and saw the bear when it was dea !, wa,
in the city on Saturday last and related
the story. The bear was very large and
would weigh 500 pounds.
Among various expressions of in
telligence which often places the dog ii
no mean place Of comparison to his mas
ter. little habit developed by . dog i,
the suburbs is worth mentioning
Whenever this dog becomes angry. in
stead Of making an exhibition OF hi
temper he turns away from the offend
ing person as quickly as possible ant
makes . bee line like . fash to tn.
nearest brook. In few minutes he re
turns dripping, but serene, without
trace Of his former excitement in hi
manner. His plunge has apparentl,
cooled of all angry feelings and ever
caused forgetfulness Of causes Of dis
turbance. Journal.
Some idea Of the great cost In tim,
and money required in producing
great engraving or etching and tho risk
assumed by the publishers may be ha,
when it is known that the engraving o
Meissoneir's "Friedland, 1907" in siz,
19xsS inches, was begun by the etcher
Jacquet, In August, 1883. and it is no
yet ready for publication. Two years
time, Of an expert, the risk of destruc
! tion by nre and Of the death OF the artis
engraver during the prosecution OF tn
work and then tho additional risk at
tending every publication whether
will afford profit or not When con
sidering the price charged for some On
cravings all the way from $3.50, or NOR
down these facts may be borne in mind
An Ohio journalist read in anothe
paper statement to the effect tha
"Miss Kellogg has . larger repertoir
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