The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-03-11
BRIGHT BITS.

A WAL oFToE-
A little corn on maiden grew,
Listen to my wall of toe
Caused by the pinch of a too tight shoe,
Instead of three number two,
IL grew, il grew,
Listen to my wall of toe.
AS time went on las time will dol,
Listen 70 my wall Of toe,
The corn waxed red-the maiden blue
Twas ten times worse than the grip (kerchew),
Too true! Two true!
Listen TO my wall of toe.
She had a seat in the end of the pew,
Listen TO my wall Of toe,
And man with another seat in view
Put his cowhide boot on her kangaroo,
Oh, whewi Oh, whew!
Listen to my wall Of toe.
-WdshinQton Post.
How BEAUTIFULLY soft it is" he murmured,
laying his hand on her gloriously white arm
How less beautiful, out o, so much softer -
she tendery replied, laying her jeweled hand
on the top Of his venerable head.-W Washington
star
JEFFERSON CITY MAN has invented patent
guard for beadsteads, to prevent children from
railing out on the floor. This device ought to
nave large sale in a state which is expanding
IN population as rapidly as Mssouri.-KGnsdS
CItV Star.
clerk.
No, think you'd better get it printed-get
oCOuO "a copies OF SO. IL IL nceu LlldI
number before he pays it, and time and money
Will De saved in the end. "-ErchGnge.
CLARA VAN STREEK-And what did papa say?
Alfred Sellers (sighing)-He said what!
Your Why, I'll boot you downstairs before I'll
let you marry my daughterl"
Clara Van Streek (practcal)-And of course
you let him-and now / am yours, Alfy!-NetC
York Sun.
Miss TwIRLER-Tm afraid, doctor, that have
heart trouble
Doctor-what makes you think so? You look
WELL
Miss Twirler-Yes, but for the last few weeks
my affections have been so terribly fickle.-
Nunsey's Weekly.
QUITE -Biggs-Old Mr.. Dresser, the
tailor who has been in business forty years,
toner's measure. What do you think of such
an ending as that to a mans life?
Boggs-Fitting clothes, should say.-Smith,
Gray d Co.'S Monthly.
RUsE OF BUSINESS. Eastern Man (writing
home from the far westt-The rush of the bust
ness in the glorious west is simply marvellous
things move like lightning. l stepped into
real estate Office on my arrival to buy lot,
and they made out the receipt and filed out the
deed in exactly three minutes.
Same Man (writing home five years later
III come back as soon as | can sell my lot. l
have been trying to sell it for four years now,
and think few years more will find a Gus
tomer.-Neto York Weekly.
DocrRINAL INrsRuCT1oN.-The son of a we'll
known Cambridge family was being given some
doctrinal instruction with somewhat unsatisfac-
tory results one evening when his Irish nurse
appeared to put him to bed. Here was an
opening:
Tom said his grandfather "who takes care
of you at Dight?'
Tom looked amazed at the stupidity of the
question.
why, Bridget Mccarthy, of course,
grandpa
Still undismayed the old gentleman per-
sisted:
who takes care of Bridget Mccarthy,
ThomaS?'
This was too much for the young man, who
looked first at his instructor and then at the
stalwart proportions of the Irish woman.
Il should think" said he. that Bridget
Mccarthy was big enough to take care of her
self, if she's ever going to bel" There was no
more doctrinal instruction that. evening.
Vide AlCdEe