davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Meridional. (Abbeville, La.) 1856-1906, 1890-06-14
a Crank Takes In tle Town

Bunkie Blade.
Last week a crank who said that
he had ridden all the way from
Mexico on horse back, was in town.
Ater telling some thrilling stories
Of the gold mines that he owned out
in The rugged mountains Of Mexico;
and other yarns that would compare
favorably with his gold mine stiffs-
during the meantime indulgiGg
freely in apple juice, he pronounced
himself ready 10 take in The town.
The citizens who we're standing by
began to turn pale and shake about
the knees, looking every midute to,
see the Mexican pull two shooters
of the frontier patent and do the
sw.sbooter ''act;" but to their utter
fxonishment and relief Of feelings,
-ashich made their knees rest easy
and their face assume a ma tural
color, the Mexican ia regular COW.
boy style, mounted his horse,
facing the crowd he asked
several questions about the
different turns in the streets, after
which he started his horse off il d
SLOW trot, by the time he reached
the end of the street his horse was
in q galop, then the fun commenced:
he slapped spurs to his steed aud
started off at break,neck speed up
sand down the streets, which attract
'ed the attention Of every person
within hearing distance of his horses
hoofs, who lookek on in fond anticis
patton to see who would get to the
end Of the street first, the rider or.
the horse, as the Mexican seem bent
Ton beating the horse from the way
he Topped his arms. kicked, leaned
forward and twisting mis- body in
every conceivable shape; but they
always got there at the same time.
After this novel yet exciting per.
Tornance, the Mexican rode back to
the place Of starting, making d
poll e bow. said: Gentlemen. that
The Meridional. (Abbeville, La.) 1856-1906, 1890-06-14

A dispatch from Joliet, H.. saya:
J. B. Stirling, secretary Of the Iii
nois Steel Co., of which company
the Joliet rolling mill is a part,
employing about 2,OC0 men, address
ed the employees last night, submit.
ting q proposition to them which is
remarkable, considering the way
the world is now running on. The
company will give to each man who
stays one year / per cent, of his
wages, and SO up to five years, when
5 per cent. of his wages will be
added to his pay; thus at the end OF
FIVE years the company will be Civ.
ing these employees $50, O0C a year.
Men entering the company's employ
July |, 1889, are entitled to the
benefit. The men received the
proposition with nnbounded Joy.
This will settle all likelihood Of
strikes or quitting Of work without
giving notice.
The Meridional. (Abbeville, La.) 1856-1906, 1890-06-14
TOO bad! Mbmims
Baton Rouge Truth.

Baton Rouge Truth.
In reporting the proceedings Of
the regular monthly meeting Of the
North Louisiana Agricultural So.
siety for May, the Picayune and
TimeseD Democrat each stated that
a committee Of ladies was appointed
to discuss at next meeting 1.-THE
Extent of man0re Influence, etc.
The question to be discussed is,
THE Extent of 1comqn's Influence on
the Farm" The ladies are not at
all pleased with the work of the
intelligent telegraphic operator or
learned proof reader who made the
fearful bad break, and if the guilty
party could be detected he would
surely hear from the fair members
OF the above named society, one of
whom writing to Is says:
I'VE organized q sub society Of
ladies, and the question for discus.
sion at next meeting is THE Extent
of Woman's Influence on the Farm"
Imagine our CONSERVATION when the
New Orleans papers announced it
as THE Extent of Manure's Influence
on the Farm" The ladies Of the
committee nearly tainted when they
read the report. Wasn't that The
awfullest newspaper error you ever
heard of? 1t appears ridiculous to
other folks. It is tragical to u.s."
Surely the author of such a wicked
error should be mobbed, and would
be ifhe made himself known to the
ladies Of the above society.
The Meridional. (Abbeville, La.) 1856-1906, 1890-06-14
APPROXIMATION PRIZES.

y TOOsSUs @
SPECIAL RATES ARRANGED WITH AGENTS.
AGENTS WANTED n tou every sgg
city in the United STATES aud British
America.
The payment of Prizes is. guaranteed BY a
special deposit of five hundred thousand
dollars tS508,000 with the State Govern
ment, and approved by Jesus Arechiga
Governor.
Drawings under the personal supervi-
sion of Lie Hermino Arteaga. who is ap-
pointed by the Government as Inter
ventOr.
II CERTIFY that with the State
treasurer all necessary guarantee are de-
posted, assuring full payment of all
prizes Of this drawing.
HERMINIo ARTEAGA, I~nterHentor.n
IMPORTANT.
Refnittanees must be either by New
YORK Draft, Express or Registered Letter,
America money. Collections can be made
by Express Companies or Banks. Ticket
sent direct to management will be paid
by drafts on New York. Montreal. st.
5au!, Chicago, San Francisco or CITY of
Mexico. For futher information address.
JUAN PHEEDAD MANAGER
A Partado 4S.
HMt
The Meridional. (Abbeville, La.) 1856-1906, 1890-06-14

An electrician has invented a
wonderful watch that will tell a man
when his note is coming due. His
watch would be q great deal more
remarkable. as useful, if it would
tell the man where to get the money
to pay the note.--Norristown He
raid.
The Meridional. (Abbeville, La.) 1856-1906, 1890-06-14

All ordinary Letters Containing
Notes. Money Orders issued
Companies or New York ExgAane
Addressed
The Meridional. (Abbeville, La.) 1856-1906, 1890-06-14
NOTICE.

Hunting on the lands and premises
of the undersigned, IS, henceforth,
prohibited. Anyone tresspassing
On bis properties will be prosecuted
to tho all extent Of the law.
J. p. GUEYDAE,
Shell Beach, La
The Meridional. (Abbeville, La.) 1856-1906, 1890-06-14
TERMINAL PRIzEs
AGENTs WANNTRD EYERYW

2, 1AaPfizes. amonntingto So
The Meridional. (Abbeville, La.) 1856-1906, 1890-06-14

heats the six-shooter act, two to one,
and it is the latest fad out west, and
has taken the place Of the six
shooter altogether"
The Meridional. (Abbeville, La.) 1856-1906, 1890-06-14
NOTICE

ABBEyfE1R, Jan
The undersigned give not
the public that bunting oa
lands and premises Is. hepes
prohibited. Any one tres
on their properties will ~
cnted to the full extent 81 tae
ADRfEN NUNEz
w. w. KuEHLls
NJ. LEoUBUz
The Meridional. (Abbeville, La.) 1856-1906, 1890-06-14
NeH Orls
Address Registered Ietf
new ORLENs NATlOaAi
NEW M

NEW 0aEg
sREMEMBER. also, that The
of Prizes is GUARANTEED Bk
NATIONAL BANKS Of New 0Tleaa
the Tickets are signed bE the Bfes
an Institution whose chartered g
Fecognizedin thehighest Courts
beware of oil limitations and ana
schemes.n January
REMEMBER THAT ONE
is the Price of the smallest part
ton of q ticket issued IN any
Anything in orr name offered
price. is either q counterfeit Of
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

Many diseases, especially those of the ner.
vous SYSTEM, are the products of daily renewed
mental exhaustion. Business avocations often
involve an amount of mental wear and tear very
prejudicial to physical health. and the profes.
sions If arduously pursued, are no less destruc.
tive to brain and nerve tissue. 1t is one of the
most important attributes of Hoststtsr's Stom,
ach Bitters that it compensates for this undue
loss Of tissue and that it imparts new energy tc
the brain and nerves. The rapidity with which
it renews weakened mental energy and physical
vitality ia remarkable, and shows that ifs in
vigorating properties are of the highest order
Besides increasing vital stamina and counter.
acting the effects of mental exhaustion, this
potential medicine cures and prevents fever and
ague, rheumatism, chronic dyspepsia and con.
supation, kidney and uterine weakness and
other complaints. Physicians also commend il
as a medicated srimulant and remedy.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18


Gold and coughs are prevalent
throughout the city, but throat affec-
tons are by far more. common among
business men. Every unfortunate one
mutters something about the abomina-
BILE weather and curses the piercing
wind. Much of the trouble, however,
is caused by overheated rooms, and q
little more attention to proper ventila-
ton would remove the cause of suffer
ing.
DIR. ]. Ewing Mears, who is thus af-
ficted, said TO an inquirer: @The husk-
mess and loss Of power of articulation
30 common among US are largely due to
the use of steam for heating. The steam
cannot be properly regulated, and the
temperature becomes too high. A per-
son living in this atmosphere has all
the cells of the lungs open, and when
he passes into the open air he is unduly
exposed. The affiiction is quite COM
mon among the men who occupy Offices
in the new buildings which are fitted
with all modern improvements.
"The substitution of electric light
for gas has wrought change to which
people have not yet adapted them
selves. The heat arising from a num-
Der of gas jets will quickly raise the
temperature of room, and uncon-
sciously people relied upon that means
of heating to some exteLt. Very little
warmth, however, is produced by the
electric light, and when man reads by
an incandescent light he at times finds
himself becoming chilly, and wonders
why it is. Too hot during the day and
too cold at night are conditions which
should be avoided" - Philadelphia
Record
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
Keeping Trousers in shape.

have solved the problem of keening
pantaloons in shape. The so-called
trousers stretchers are in many respects a
delusion and snare. The machine has
tendency towards lengthening the legs.
My plan is to have a separate pair of sus-
penders for each pair Of pants and hang
the garment by the supporters on two
pegs about as far apart as mans
shoulders. Try this and you will notice
that the pants will never bag at the
knees. Besides there is great deal of
time and worry saved in not being
obliged to change suspenders every time
you change trousers. -[St. Louis Globe
Democrat.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

A departure
from ordinary methods has long
been adopted by the makers of DIR.
Pierce's Golden Medical Discovery.
They know what it can do-and
they guarantee it. Your money
is promptly returned, if it fails to
benefit or cure in all diseases arising
from torpid liver or impure blood.
No better terms could be asked for.
No better remedy can be had.
Nothing else that claims to be a
blood-purifer is sold in this way
because nothing else is like the
&C. M. D."
So positively certain is it in its
curative effects as to w0rr0et its
makers in selling it, as they are do
ing, through druggists, on trial.
It's especially potent in curing
letter, Salt-rheum, Eczema, Fry
sipelas, Boils, Carbuncles, Sore
Eyes, Goitre, or Thick Neck, and
Enlarged Glands, Tumors and
Swellings. Great Eating Ulcers
rapidly heal under its benign in
fiuence. Worlds Dispensary Med
ical Association, 663 Main Street,
Buffalo. N. Y.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

Reggie-Cholly's matched his pair of
donkeys against Bertie's cobs and Teddy's
broncos.
The Major-Cholly goin' to drive the
donkeys?
Reggie-Of cou'se.
The Major-Then 1 back the donkeys.
Reggie-ButI don't see why, dontcher-
know.
The Major-Because three of kind
beats two pairs.-Ltfe.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

Will-Have you never noticed how
frequently it happens that sons are
exactly the opposite to their fathers?
George-Certainly, there are a great
many families in which this is the case.
'Were you acquainted with my
father?"
''No, never knew him personally,
but 1 have always understood that he
was very intelligent gentleman.-Terds
Siftin0S.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

Harry docking over manuscript)-You
don't expect any editor will accept such
stuff ss that, do you?
Jack-Certainly nOtl 1t has been re-
fused by seven already.
Harry-Why under the sun do you
keep on sending it around.
Jack-rm trying to discover how
many ways thing can be cOurteously
declined.
Harry-What for?
Jack-I promised to go with Imogene
to the dinner of the Mystic Cooking
Club.-Lge.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
Splendid Luck.

''Hullo, Walton; did you have any luck
on your fishing trip Yesterday"
"Yes-splendid."
"How many did you catch?"
"Didn't catch any; but about three
miles up the river we struck camping
party who had two kegs of beer, and we
were invited to join them. "-Norristo,cn
Herald.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

First Custom-House Inspector Cat the
steamship pier)-I've been watching that
heavily overdressed woman for some
time, and I have my suspicious.
Second Custom-House Inspector-So
have I; I think she is heavily under
dressed. Let's call one of our female
smuggler-pullers!
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
II. Excellent onnIItI.,

Commend TO public approval the CaIfornIs
liquid fruit remedy. Syrup Of Figs. It is
pleasing TO the eye and to the taste. and By
gently acting on the kidneys. liver and
bowels. II cleanses the system effectually.
thereby promoting the health and comfort
Of ali who use Il
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

A GREAT mistake perhaps was made when
DR.. Sherman named his great remedy
Prickly Ash BTTTERs: but 1t is presumed
that at that time all remedies for the blood,
ETC., were called Bitters. Had he called 1t
Prickly Ask Regulator" Curative" or
almost anything but Btttcrs, it undoubtedly
would have superseded all other prepara-
tions OF similar character. The name Bit
ters is misleading; it is purely . medicine,
and cannot be used q beverage.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

First Editor-What! Your building
burned down?
Second Editor (sadly)-Yes!
''How did it happen?"
so, one of those erotic poems by a
young lady was sent in, and foolishly
threw it in the waste basket along with a
lot of other paper and it set fire to
verything. g."-EUchange
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

"Oh, SIR" continued the Texas trav-
eler, ''you do not know what it is to be in
the hands of a desperate gang of men, to
have rope around your neck, and to
feel it crushing and crushing on your
throat, to-
''No, interrupted the other, ''but !
know what it is to propose and be ac.
cepted by a Boston girl."--PhttadetpliO
Times.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

Mr.. Gush (after the proposaD-And
what can give you, darling, to seal the
vows which have passed between us?
Miss Giddy-Well, George, don't you
think sacque would be very nice?
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
discriminating Evidence.

Visitor-What are you doing with that
old Bible, Miss Yellowleaf?
Miss Yellowleaf-Well, the fact is I'm
going to tear out the leaf that has the
record Of my birth. 1t doesn't quite
agree with what told the census man,
and / am afraid some one might see it,
Limit
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
DUBIOUS EoREBoDINGs.

Miss Columbia--Are you sure you
really love me and are not marrying me
on account of my wealth.
Lord Anglo-And are you sure you
love me and are not marrying me on ac-
count of my title San Francisco Wasp.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

No SOAP has eper been initiated as much
as Dobbins' Electric Soap. The market is
not deceived. j. B. Dobbins, Philadelphia
and New York. is stamped on every bar.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

DR. L. L. GoRSUCH, Toledo, O., says Il
have practiced medicine for forty years; have
never seen preparation that could prescribe
with so much confidence of success as I can
Halls Catarrh Cure" Sold by Druggists, Zoe.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

The reason men never stop at one glass
when taking whisky is because it is O cereal
drink, and always has to be continued in the
neckS
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
THE JoKER'S BUDGET.
TESTS AND YARNS BY FUNNY
MEN OF TIE PRESS.

Dubious Forebodings-shs Saw too
Much-The Trouble-A Brutal
Retort, Etc, Etc.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

do GOOD with tn at thou hast, or it will
do thee no good" Ifyou know all about
SAPOLIO put your knowledge to use.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

ELEVEN children out OF twelve need DR..
Bulls Worm Destroyers occasionally.
These dainty little candies are always safe
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

GIRLS look upon the engagement ring az q
very promising hitGdelphiG ChTOili-
cle-t Herald,
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
A SHOCK TO HIS FAITH.

''Now, Tommy, " said that young mans
mother, after a heated encounter in
which he had come out second best,
''say your prayers right away and get
into bed"
81 already said 'em, maw," answered
Tommy, ''as soon as found out you
meant to gimme a lickin', but it didn't
work. p Terre Haute Express.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
The swans Last Song

The Swans Last Song.
Mrs. Peterby-Don't you think it is
very remarkable that a swan should sing
before dying?
Judge Peterby--Not so much SO as I
would II they sang after dying. -Terds
.Siftings
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

BEEcHAM's PILLS act like magic on Q
WEAK STOMACH.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

THE man who lives too fast is bound to die
too quick.-NelU Orleans PtcGHlns
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

THE most appropriate pastry for free
lunch counter-spongc cake.-EEttddelpI,
fr,n
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

THE best cough medicine is Piso's Cure
for Consumption. Sold everywhere. 25c.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
THE STOVE WENT OUT.

Mistress during heated term)-Get
dinner to-day on the gasoline stove,
Bridget.
Bridget-Plaze, mum, did thry, but
tn stove wint out.
Mistress-Try again, then.
Bridget-Yis, mum, but it's not come
back yit. 1t wint out Trough tn roof
New York Weekly.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
NoTHIN'.

"My dorg kin lick your dorg, Tommy
Bodkins."
ssHe can't do no sech thing, Patsey
Mcintyre; 'ain't got no dorg."
swell, my pa kin lick yourn."
s'Can't neither; 'aint got no pa"
'tWell, my ma kin lick yourn.
''Bet she can't; amt got no ma"
tWhat hev yer got, anyhow9"
''Nothin'"
"Well, jcs yer come over here, an
III take that out O yer."-[ [Harper's Ba-
gar,
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

.'PM locked in slumber," murmurs the
prison bird i'll his slcep.-P Philadelphia Record.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

Mrs. Colt (wife of Col. Colt, of Texas)
AS was going by Turner's this morn
ing, John, heard Jim Bluff say that il
justice had it's due you'd have adorned a
telegraph pole long ago.
Col. Colt (springing up from dinner
table)-Jim Bluff, you say? Let me
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
UxDEcEIvED AT LAST.

Barber-Your head is full of dandruff,
sir.
Customer-rm glad you told me. I
was under the impression that it was
brains. II Life.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
A FAMILIAR CUSTOMER.

New Boy Cat news tand)-That man
has been standing there an hour reading
all the latest weeklies and magazines.
News Man-Have patience. He'll buy
penny paper when he gets through
TGood News.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
CHARGES SUSTAINED.

Immigrant Tnspector-We have infor-
nation that you came over here on con-
tract.
Lord Fitzmud- Fitzmud indignantly
-Aw-what-er-er- why, you wude, i'm
pudent fellah, come ovah here to marry
Miss Angelina Goldust, of New Yawk.
Immigrant Inspector (triumphantly)-
Well, what's the matter with yer; amt
marriage contract? You'll have to go
back.-[Life
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
STRUCK BY A TRAMP.

"What do, you mean9" said gentle
man, jumping aside as tramp drew
back his hand as if to strike him.
Nothing at all, sir" replied the
tramp meekly. 81 wouldn't strike you
for $50, sir. No, SIR" he continued
hurriedly; ''no, sir, wouldn't. But if
you will permit me I'd like to strike you
for quarter"
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
The Elects of Mental Exhaustion.

Wife-Now, John, please finish you
dinner. The shooting will l2eep.-Life.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
A TEcHNIcAL1TY.

Susie Papa, isn't it murder to kill a
hog2
Papa (who is lawyer)--Not exactly.
Murder is assaulting with intent to kill,
the other is killing with intent to salt. -.
Harper's Bazaar.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
AN INTELLIGENT ANIMAL.

Cautious Dame-Are you sure this
horse is suitable for lady to drivea
Livery Man--Yes'm. He's very in
telligent hoss, mum, and won't let you
run him into anything.
LOVES TIE DOESN'T BIND THE DOG.
Oh, loves chain of wondrous might,
We find it as on we jog;
Twill tie up hearts exceeding tight
But will not tie the dog.
j Washington Post.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
1MpRAcTrcABLE ADVICE.

Husband-Dr. Knowall says people
should change their clothing with the
weather
Wife-Huh And haven't but ten
dresses to my name, and only one waiting
maid.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
THE TABLES TURNED.

Distinguished Guest (at the summer
resort hoteD D-Garcon, you may hand me
the menu. By the way, your face is
strangely familiar.
Possibly. sir. Proudly.)
was guest of this hotel last year.
Distinguished Guest Indeed. (To
himself) I was waiter.-[Life.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

''What do you like best about school
GeorgeG'
''Not gettin' caught whisperin'."
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
A SUGGESTION.

"I don't know whether to make the
incision from the left hankipanki over to
the boorioboolaga, three inches, or to
achieve the same results by cutting from
the parallax straight through to the rut-
abaga," said the surgeon to his assistant.
''Take the short cut and you'll get
there quicker, DOCTOR" suggested the
patient New York Sun.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
PARTICULARS NEEDED.

fastener Gin far Western store)-Got
any neckties9
Proprietor mystifed) )-Um -er-what
sort-silk, calico or hemp9 Il -[Good
News.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

She (after marriage)-You told me
that I was your first love, but l have
found a whole trunkful Of letters from
all sorts of girls, just bursting with ten
derness.
He'll said you were the first I ever
loved. l didn't say you were the only
one who ever loved me. Sect New
Y ,rk Weekly.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
LOST TRACK OF THE PRICE.

New Boarder-What is the price of
good, fresh butter?
Landlady-Really, I couldn't tell. It's
been so long since 1 made any inquiries
about it.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

Agent-That child is very much like
you, Madam.
''It is not my child, Sir"
Gone would know that, Madam, for it
is very bomely little thing"
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
THE NEXT THING.

Mrs. Larkin (reading)-Mrs. McGill
of Salt Lake City found $5 gold piece
in crop of chicken she was dressing
for dinner.
Larkin-Now look out for an English
syndicate to buy up oil the chickens in
the country New York Sun.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18

''What's this2"
"That's your condensed milk"
''But ordered quart--that's no
quart"
Eyes, if is. It's condensed quart. "
Il Bazar.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1890-09-18
THE MERcENARy GIRL.

Miss Gotham-what kind of scent do
you preferl
Miss Bullion-Cent per cent.-[New
York Herald