The Globe-republican. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1889-1910, 1890-01-29
POOR COUSIN PARKER.
How He Returned All Favors
With Interest.

1t had long been the custom of the
Tasker family to hold an annual meet
ing in August at East Village. Such
TaSkers as were present asked about the
Taskers absent The Taskers absent
wrote letters to Abram Tasker at East
Village, who read them aloud at the
other the stirring family events which
had happened during the year since the
previous family meeting. Sometimes
the Taskers present were called upon to
commiserate death, or to discuss an
engagement, or to congratulate young
bride Sometimes they read of new
Taskers who had come into the world
Sometimes the squalling new-coming
Tasker presented himself in prOpraa per-
soma. Arrays they met to pity and to
blame poor Cousin Parker!
There were Boston Taslxers, and Chi
cago Taskers, and New York Taskers.
Then there were Taskers from every
State in New England. Universally,
however, the Taskers present felt called
upon every year to contribute for the
benefit of poor Cousin Parker. He lived
away off up in New Hampshire some
where-it was quite indefinite where he
lived, and hitherto he seemed to live on
his relatives.
He had had, it was said by kind-heart-
ed old Abram Tasker, at family gath
ering, the hardest kind of hard luck.''
Qt made the Chicago Tasker very angry
to hear about his hard lucky I'm the
first place." said Abram. ''he never had
ought to hev married Mis- Frink, the
school ma'am Mis- Frink was a widder
lady with nine children; an those chill
dren! they ate Cousin Parker outen
house an home; yes, they did. Then
he want fitted for business, an he
Oughtn't t have started to manufacture
oleomargarine in butter community
Cousin Parker nigh lost his life-he was
shot at because of that there oleomarra-
rine in butter community. Then he
hedn't ought t hev tried borin' for lie
up in that granite region where he lived;
there want no lie there, an Parker
he ought t hev known better. Then he
tried farmin' an failed. because he tried
1T according to city farmers journal.
He planted at the wrong season. He
hev mighty hard luck
Every year there would come to the
meeting either Cousin Parker himself. or
a long wall of a letter from Cousin Par
ker describing his Affections and asking
for help. Every year purse was raised.
and the relatives were taxed for ''Mis'"
Frink-Parker's benefit and her nine chill
-dren. Every year the assembled Task
'ers grumbled, and the Chicago Tasker
stopped coming East because of it. 'It
do SEEM" said Abram, '.as if the hull |
family was merely Twin from year to
year to kinder support Cousin Parker"
Miss Perkins. whose mother was |
Tasker. of Newburyport with the ac-
cent, please. on the ''port"), was used |
to speaking out in meeting, and she
usually freed her mind every year-she |
was regular attendant at these family |
meetings. She freed her mind. but at |
the same time she gave literally. And |
it was noticed that the louder were her |
protests, and the more severe her con-
demnation of Cousin Parker's unfOrtu- |
nate business habits, the larger sum she |
gave toward his support
cousin Parker" she snapped out as |
the meeting last August, don't deserve i
any luck. Turned inventor no,e. has he?
Well, land. what can he invent@'
..Hush, Miss Perkins, said Abram;
cousin Parker is present with u.s.
Miss Perkins put on her eyeglasses |
and looked around the circle of Taskers,
who had assembled in the great barren
parlor of Abram Tasker's great farm
house. There were several Boston
Taskers (N. B., the rich Taskers); there
were the New York Taskers livery well |;
Off; there were all the Vermont Task.
ers (hard. earnest folk; and there, last |
Of all, in corner, almost out of sight |