The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1890-03-07

ceived that my Uncle John was as my
father had described him, a venerable
old man, all white hair and spectacles,
wearing tapped cap.
my sisters sent their duty and re-
spects, SIR" 1 said.
And then my uncle gave a sort of
grunt.
"Don't you find the room little dark,
Uncle JOHN" remarked. s5.,..s
"It's on account of my poor eyes," re-
piled my Uncle John, in the hoarse
whisper that seemed habitual with him,
"that's why I'm forced to wear these
green spectacles," he said.
How stupid was to have forgotten
my uncle's weakness of vision. l-
Then there was long silence, which
was broken by my Uncle john.
"You amt thinking of marrying, 10
seph, are your" said my uncle.
"Why, blesS,me, no, uncle" l replied.
'I've only thirty shillings week, and
there are four of u.s."
"But if she was an heiress, Joseph?
croaked my uncle.
"I'm open to an heiress," l replied.
''That was likely girl thai opened the
door for you, Nephew Joseph said my
Uncle John. "Pm very fond of that
likely girl" he went on, land she's an
heiress," added my uncle mysteriouSy,
"and she's a sort of girl as 'ud make
any young man happy" ..-
I didn't quite see how the slatternly
girl was calculated to make any young
man happy, but remembered that she
was my uncle's stepdaughter; so re-
marked namely, "She'sa spanking young
woman, sir"
'tShe's all that, nephew" croaked out
my uncle. "She's the very image of her
blessed mother, and look how happy
that woman has made me. Don't you
think you'd like to walk out with her,
Nephew Joseph? Don't you think you'd
like to take her to the Crystal Palace%
said the tempter, my uncle.
"One can't afford to take girls to the
Crystal Palace, uncle" replied, con
thirty shillings a week."
"But suppose I was to stand Sam,
said my uncle. Joseph" continued my
uncle mysteriously, ''she's a-puttin' OF
her Sunday clothes. You wait till you
see her when she's dressed
Here was horrible situation. My
uncle was about to propose that should
take the slatternly girl to the Crystal
Palace in her Sunday clothes, and all the
time I was engaged to Sophia; but
didn't dare to say anything about Sophia
to my Uncle John. .-saE -...
"That likely girl that's dressin' her
self for you, Nephew Joseph, in the next
room, IL have 200 golden sufferings the
day she marries, and I've been saving heI
up for you, Nephew Joseph, ever since
my wedding day. There's e5 note on
the mantel for you, Joseph, and there's
a suffering inside. Take her to the Pal
ace, nephew, and let me hear you've
squared it between you when you bring
her home. Don't you spare expense,
Joseph; treat her to swings and merry
go-rounds, take her on the switchback
railway; and mind you travel fust class,
Joseph, there's nothing fetches young
girl like travelling fust class. L was
young myself, once, Joseph" added my
uncle, with sigh. "She's a real high
stopper is Polly"
There was nothing else for it; I had tc
express my delight, and as did so the
real high stopper entered the room.
shouldn't have known her. She was
appalling that's the only word for it.
''She's a blessed angel" said my
uncle with enthusiasm, land the very
image of her dear mother. Heaven
bless you, my children! Don't be latel
than 9, Joseph. Good-by, children" he
said. And then and the real high step
per started for the Crystal Palace.
I draw veil over my sufferings al
that place Of amusement. Polly chung
to my arm till felt as if we were STA
mese twins; and she made warm love tc
me upon the switchback railroad.
you're the first young man I've evel
walked out WITH" she said to me ingenu
ously while the fireworks were going on.
was no philanderer, and was desper-
ately in love with Sophie; but couldnt
afford to quarrel with my uncle, SO
pretended to make love to Polly. I dis
sembled, and made it as like the rea
thing as possible; and when we reached
Araminta terrace felt like the villain
of a melodrama. Polly opened the dool
with latch key. We went straight w
to my uncle's bedroom, where the old
gentleman was still lying in state. Il
possible, his room smelt more strongly
than ever of brandy.
you're very late, Joseph" said my
uncle, reprovingly; "but young people
will be young people. was young
person once"
My uncle is getting little mixed,
thought. Dr.
slow did you enjoy yourself, Polly9'
croaked my uncle. a..t 3D..
lit was just heavenly, mother" cried
the girl; and then the cat was out of the
bag. Here was Polly s mother masquerad
ing as my Uncle John. Horrible thought.
flashed through my mind. Perhaps they
had murdered him and buried him il
the coal cellar. ] seized the poker.
shouted "Police"~ rushed upon my
supposed Uncle John and seized his lone
white beard. 1t, his venerable wig, hi
hairy face, his tapped cap and his green
spectacles came away in my hand, and
saw fat, red faced woman, perfectly
bald, and with huge sham eyebrows Of
white hair. III
a"Ain't you ashamed of yourself, you
young rapscallion, to treat your great
aunt in this way, and me lone widow
Oh, Mr.. Joseph" cried the woman, as
she bounced out of bed and flung herself
upon her knees. "Worleybone's beer
dead these three months, and we amt
provided for, and was doing my best
for Polly, which is my daughter, being
my bounden duty. Oh, Mr.. Joseph
spare the widow and her orphan childp'
"Down on your marrow bones!" cried
the frightened woman to her daughter;
eff it hadn't been for you, you hussy,
he'd never, never have found me OUT"
and Miss Polly, the high stopper, drop
ped on her knees at her mothers side.
OF course forgave them; of course
came into the $4,000; of course mar
ried Sophia, and equally of course
have never said word to her of the
fearful day at the Crystal Palace with
the high stepping Polly, or my subse-
quent terrific adventure at 'Araminta
terrace, Hoxton.-St. James Budget.
Lapp Wolf Hunt.
NIL a.. ..&;.ol,, Nth h