Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1890-10-11
LONGFELLOw's POEMS REVISED


FANNIE B, WARD.
LONGFELLOw's POEMS REVISED.
Version Which VIII Not Bring Blush
to the Cheek Of Innocence.
From the New York Tribune
1t is rumored in the literary circles Of Boston
that revised version OF the poeticai works of
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow will shortly be
placed on the market. His publishers have
learned with emotion that one of his most ia
mliiar poems, The Building OF the Ship" has
proved cause Of offense; that II has been in
dicted as calculated to start q Blush on the
cheek OF Innocence. Now. the members of the
nrm OF Houghton, Wifflin Il Company are not
only publishers, but moral men. so naturally
they are anxious to do the square thing by
Innocence. The delicate task OF pre- pairing this
revised version has been intrusted. as is I'M
derstood, to an accomplished Brooklyn critic,
and Judging from the advance sheets he has
performed his delicate task in a highly credit
able manner. We have not the space to give
more than a few of his felicitous alterati Of
the original text, but our selections. are
snre, will convince the intelligent reader that
the revision will supply whatever popular
want exists for It
1. The Building of the Ship. This poem as
~ stands calls the sea the bridegroom of the
ship. 1t also deals with another couple COM
posed OF sentient beings. to wit. young man
VINO Is evidently engaged to the ship builders
daughter, and that young lady. In the revision
the sea Is spoken of as the grandfather of the
snip, while the young lady-who is going out
In the vessel on its initial voyage a mission
airy to the Fiji Islands-is represented as
being the elder sister, a good deal freckled
but very good, Of the young man. The ship
builder sings:
my SON" SAID aid he I'VE viii build this ship
Ana IoIt0M we'll this Iian OF mime.
Here together shall combine;
And the day that gives her 10 the sea
Your ~ sister and You shall sail for Fin."
EnTsptured the young man heard.
He kissed his reckied elder sister, A'f'
Iik LINZ oesuteous barge WAS she
nhis side the place where the pillows grow rougher
Was rather sort of kind Of duaer
The ocean old.
With WITH his bis snow white hair and trembling lip.
10 10 as , iondiy toward him 1t leans and lurchss
They're watching u.s. child in The City of Churches,
II some schoolmaster
ShSf o5r rise Sc and remark mad hopper
Aiio' oui reiailohs were quite improper"
Z The Skeleton in Armor. This poem calls
ior very little revision. Only one Of its verses
Is 70 Dc altered, slightly altered. This is the
one:
wooed the blue-eyed maid.
Yielding, yet half afraid,
And IN the forest shade
Our VOWS Were plghted-
Gnder its loosened vest
FlGttered her little breast
Like birds within their nest
By the hawk frighted,
In the revised version this will read:
Iwooed the bue-eyed maid
But she was sore afraid.
For in the forest shade
doomed up lauky.
o, it was sweet see
Sstwo beneath a tree.
OF Moody aud Sankey!
8. Excelsior. Ii will be remembered that
the hero of this poem while on his way to the
uplands receives an invitation from Young
lady:
"Oh stay" the maiden said, land rest
Thy weary head upon this breast"
tear stood in his bright blue eve,
But still he answered with sigh.
The revisor felt that this was not the sort of
proposition to be addressed to a Young gem
neman distinctively bent upon the higher life.
He also was penetrated with the conviction
that it was calculated to start Blush on the
cheek OF Innocence. Hence when he gets
through with the verse it will have this form:
20 stay remarked the maiden coy,
Get thee to Brooklyn" cried the Lad,
Then added-'twas q way he had
The second line of the above is pretty long
but then SO is Art. Mr. Longfeilow himself
holds, what is lost in rythm is gained in pro-
priety.
4. Endymion. In the unexpurgated edition
this poem is inclusive Of a sensational statement
concerning Diana:
On such tranquil night az this,
She woke Endymion with kiss,
He n dTsane sPi not On On her EFH love
Those who have felt that LongfelIow needed
to be taken in hand by judicious revisor will
be delighted at the Transformation which this
quatrain has undergone:
On such tranquil night she found
So, tearing what might 6eiaii him,
she hired a HAL to call him.
1t is not impossible that in the final revision
the last two lines of the above will run:
So she woke him with many a call
And her proddng parasoL
5. The Courtship of Miles Standish. Pris-
elias searching question addressed to John
Alden,
Why don't you speak for yourself John,
is to be stricken out as in the last degree
unmaidenly, not to say brazen. In its place
will be put question which has not yet been
decided upon. But it will probably be. Don't
you think we're going to have an open winter.
John? Or, What's the best news up your wav.
John? Or, Do you happen to know good cure
for a cold. John?
G. The Day is Done. This poem has never
been accused of starting a Blush on the cheek
OF Innocence. No; but the revisor thought
that while he had his hand in it might be well.
In the interest of 'distinctively American
literature, to alter its last verse bit:
And the night shall be filled with music
And the cares that infest the day,
Shall field up their tents like the Arabs.
And as silently steal away.
The Arabs be-that is to say, what have we
got to do with the Arabs? the revisor is under
stood to inquire as he adopts the amendment:
And the night shall be filled with music
Shall fold up their tents like our Barnum,
And as silently steal away
We have exhausted our space. But it is safe
to say we have made it clear that the revised
Longfellow leaves nothing to be desired-saye
possibly the other edition. 1t is only to be
added that the entire civilized world will unite
in the prayer that the day may never come
when the cheek of Innocence may lack
champions.
Cerfafn Attributes of a Gauflana,