The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1890-11-29
iHlCdlcu.
Everyday Cranks.


Everyday Cranks.
Have YOU ever noticed the look of scorn
v hich spreads over the features of "a trot-
ting horse crank when you speak to him
of a. running horse? And, on the Other
hand. You cannot fail to notice the scorn
which wreatheS the countenauce OF |
running horse fanatic when you mention
a trotter. spoke to one OF the former i
one day this week abont the achieve
ments of Cecil county runner at New
Jersey track. The look of disgust that
came over his face was something horrible |
to gaze upon.
Say" he remarked, ejecting pint OF
tobacco juice, this talk about runners
makes me tired. don't take no interest
in runners. There's 10 sport about 1t.
You might just as we'll take string OF
elephants and race 'em. See? The man
what sees sport in running lace hes
mighty poor idee OF sport"
The advocates of running are just as
sincere in their adherance to that branch
of the sport as the others, and just as
emphatic in their scorn of trotting. A
few DAYS later | heard one of them say
"a trottipg race is about as dreary as
funeral procession Why, Id just as soon
sit up all night at Morgue as occupy
seat on the Grand stand at a trottipg
affair. You sit on hard bench for several
houls before the races begin, and then
when they do bring out the horses and
Just as you think they're off, the bell
rings and they have to commence all
over again. If that's what you Call sport
give me a strawberry festival"
No two men hold the same Opinions
upon all matters, and the man who
imagines 10 can please everybody is
either fool or a knave.
The last paragraph in the above re-
minds me of species OF girl whom you
meet frs queutly-that is, the opinionless
girl. call her "opinionless' Tor wait
of better term.
You meet her everywhere, and the
more you meet her the m ,re you are i'm
pressed with the fact thu she either has
no brains or is too lazy to use them. You
happen to meet her on the street ard
naturally remark that it is going to rair.
If you have headache aud tell her
about it-and where is the person WHO
doesn't tell every other person he meets
about his infirmities ?-she sympathizes
with you, and says she has a headache
and a faint touch of toothache. II you
feel like the proverbial lark she is with
you. In fact, her sentiments are but the
echo of your own.
cnce knew d girl who agreed with
everyone in everything. Ii you sat at
table and ate cucumbers and mince pie
together she did the same if you said
your neighbor on the left devoured soup
with noise like hog she seconded you.
On one occasion an argument arose when
she was in the room. Both sides ad-
vanced their fayorite theories, while she
did not know which side to advocate.
Finally, she was appealed to, and the
mental agony she endured in being
obliged to differ with one side and favor
the other may be imagined. She com.
promised By remaining silent.
Whether this sort OF thug is the result
OF training, or a lack of intellect, or
l. I'll
to have notion OF her own is more than
| care to explain. But she exists, aid
while We cannot reform her or place a
contradictory idea in her brain. let LIS
hope that the future will modify her 10
that she will De able TO dissent from our
opinions, Tor one who hUmors us in every
thing, who does not argue with us, is
most insIpid person to endure.
There is the person who continually
talks shop Or business. No matter what
the time or place, III church, ON the
street, at party, he talks vi nothing
but his business, and reminds one OF
violinst playing on single string.
Whether he is the butcAer, the baker or
candle stick maker, he impressos you
with that fact, and tries to convince you
that his goods are the best aud cheapest,
and all others in his line are frauds and
swindlers.
If you try to open conversation on
politics lie interrupts you with descrip.
ton, il LIE be a tailor, Of the last suit he
made Tor the unfortunate who is to be
married next week. If you talk about
current events he switches OF oz
eulogy OF the striped pants he wears, and
dwslls with loving tenderness on the
beauty Of each curve and line.
Printers are, perhaps, the greatest SIM
ners in this respect. A printer has ego.
tsm enough to think that he knows a
thing or two more than the average man,
and he bases his conduct accordingly.
His conversation is Atut1ed with technical
terms about his trade unknown to the
uninitiated, and the higher his talk is
spiced with the theme the better pleased
he is. A piiLtsr never ceases to talk shop
except when hs is drnnk, and when
printer becomes drunk his jag is of such
weight that TALKING is out OF the ques-
ton.
or all the bores with which this other
wise pleasant world is cursed the infant
prodigy is the most torturing. By this
l don't mean every year old infant whose
fond parents imagine it is the sweetest,
cutest darling of all. No it is whom the
infant attAins the age OF or years
(Some are younger, some are Older, and |
some, thank fortune, never reach that |
age, they die young), that their boring |
proclivitles become greatest. IL is usually |
OH lx,