Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1890-10-06

| chilly reception at Vienna as Mr.. Delamatei
did at New Castle the other day.
THE tariff has increased the price of eggs
which will be good news for the bad actor.
THE baseball players will now give their feet
and hands rest, but will continue to work
their jaws, more's the pity.
PUT away the bat and batter,
Hang the mask upon the wall,
Shoot the crank whose awfnl clatter
Brings back mem'rys of baseball.
THE clergy of Treves in Germany, have de-
clared that lawn tennis is not fit game for the
Frauleins. Possibly there's too much racket
in IL to suit the surpliced shepherds.
THE devil seems to be umpiring the game of
life.
THE Delamater boomers are paying more at
tention to the campaign to come than the cam
paign on hand. Stick to the issues of the day,
gentlemen.
FOUNTAINS can play night and day without
growing tired.
THE only dealer not benefited by advertising
Is the faro dealer.
IL Birchall had 1ured Benwer over the line
and killed him on this side he would not be in
the shadow of the gallows now.
You cannot be arrested for begging pardon.
IT is not necessary to join gymnastic club
to learn how to turn your attention.
8oULANGER made the millions of the
Duchess d'Uzes fly at. the rate of about $1,000
q. week. To what base uses, etc.
THE Oklahomaites know how to get good re.
suits out of their Legislature. They make the
members work under an armed guard. Law
making at the muzzle of shotgun is decidedly
refreshing
The anti-lottery law is bit more sweeping
than the general public supposed. 1t includes
lots beside the New Orleans nuisance.
MOTHER EVE was the first person to turn
over new leaf.
THE fellow who talks behind your back does
not relish back talk.
DOWN to the South the sun has gone,
The birds are fitting;
Frost paints the earth at early dawn
For autumn's fitting.
The shades of night fall earlier than when
The hay was grass;
oh, these be the days of happiness to men
Who sell US gas.
THE Congress just ended has one thing to
boast abour-it was the longest on record.
BLACKGUARDIsM will not disprove Emery's
charges, gentle men. Stop it.
ITO DRY straight'-mean1ng to come out all
rights the latest London slang. Dense isn't
it. anglo-maniacs who use the phrase will nave
to furnish diagram.
THE Congressman left enough in the treas
ury to pay their salaries at all events.
SOME betting men get straight tip on
If an avaricious man were offered all the
money he could lift he would rupture blood
vessel in the attempt
DEALERS who throw in a baby gun with a
package of prize candy are determined to teach
the young idea how to shoot.
SOME of the policemen counting New York's
population are liable to call twice at the little
side doors Of the saloons and practice double
entry.
IF Congressman Cannon is defeated at the
WELL-stocked drugstores will profit by the |
rew tariff. They will elevate their drugs to fit
the higher duties. 1t will cost more to be sick |
than it used to. |
The cold water candidate should get the |
floating vote, but he won't.
WHEN a princess Of the blood bushes she
holds royal flush.
THE market quotations on baseball players |
have dropped several points.
COMMON sense is not quite common enough.
THE men of Manitoba are short of matrimo. |
nial material. Go Northwest girls.
THE Cramps have been cramped for money, |
but are all right now. That sl300O, 600 cruiser |
is pretty plum.
IT is not always the mark of cockney to
drop the "b." THE PITTsBURG DISPATCH |
sensibly drops it from the name of its native
Tribune. Thanks, awfully.
WILLIE WINKLE. |