Telegram-herald., 1890-10-06

- uns ar AZ - tnas 4 s~enas- - ne.
4a1 - -, ,xesoFs AZ ave s<~a feal
seec sscGs ssearizx - sh-a I hass
ehz1sed serks ~irh sezas q rses2 tezt
eay s~e-rsEs b IAelr th-ass. "a 80,
snsFe thss wss Cd oesnra1ss lac. aad
tasy s~<2riaz q n1ins - Eetsrn-
'-l4e naan-fn asssT forss< his KID
Eess q Ee-s~ore that ~ wAs ~ ths
z1xsx whsa i sEruck nv. he gave tAs
cate &E1 everything. al the circun-
Stances regarding the cass snd s2la tnat
after mianighE th<y h~d invested soEae
tao Thousand zpsvx n9l1s II TIE door
ard extended thsfa inso tie atmosphere
above. when BE w.s called ugo1 u AL
he sad be took shs Sugsr With heavy
heart, BAT made lsss spp-sal hoping -
bore into the barre sni hl ~-shgab
eyed boys, who hsd been whooplng Of Is
ap TIE night before aud 81 plRet now
FOR something q naisten their mouths.
which, as they expressed IL. ha3 = favor
which reminded them Of basket Il
pups.
IIe said he al al once heard yell.
which turned the hairspring IN his
watch perfectly white lie Jerked the
anger our, aud. according 20 his sw0rn
testimony. sn ne end il had fras
Inent Of an old army shirt and birth
mark which he recognized. saying TO
those about him. Ny God we have
bored into the commissary's assistant; let
US begone without delay
After such testimony as this thought
would only have u establish my own
identity. and assert on oath that my vi
tails are constantly exposed 10 the night
air, and my finer feelings are liable AT
any moment 10 fall out and be appropri-
ated by others. | did 80 state % the
commissioner OF pensions, who replied
IN fippant way, referring me 10 tho
bureau Of vital statistics. and stating
that friend of his hsd just perfected an
awning 10 DO worn over such spertures
10 keep the works Of those who had been
bored into in that way from getting
freckles on them.
80 have mortgaged my place, think
ing it was perfectly safe TO do so, and
that beneficent government would
listen TO my sorrows and pity my great
misfortune. But the surplus has came
and it has went away, and am left
here on my mortgaged farm. trying to
raise the mortgage with one hand and
hold my pancreas in with the other,
while you people at Washington, full OF
fun, good victuals and high purposes,
sit there on tho woolsack, as il were,
ready 10 burst with i'll concealed laugh
ter every time display my wound.
Dog on such a government, Isay, and
Isayit fearless, too. Who cares a tinker
mill site for mirth and multiplication
tables and mean temperature and the
mortality among microbes when folks
are suffering on every hand? You seem
TO think you are saving the great ship OF
state by asking me TO state ON oath that
/ am in debt. and not only CRAFTY the
idle and venomous curiosity OF your old
senseless burro that hasn't been able
vet TO count a single town correct since
| knew it, but then you must also come
and ask me TO swear TO my shame, and
make oath publicly to my tottering
credit.
"Go tol you old intellectual pus cav
ityl Go home, you old stirling ass, and
put a bread-snd-milk poultioc on your
morbid curiosity. Get outl Avaunt! and
don't waste any time about it. Go home
and tell your folks TO bar the door when
they see the fatigued Washington foo
killer coming Tell them l said sol'
There are others, many others. that
are Of interest, but space viii not permit
of any further at this time. shall nc
doubt, in my work of eIpurgating, find
others which may be published in the
press in the future.
a oAt
~ en Ax