davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1890-11-13
Theory and Practice.

Good Mlnister-I don't see how am TO get
through my sermon to-day. It's almost church
| time.
Fond Wife What Il the text!
| at Ia about the wise and foolish virgins"
"But you were writing at that sermon last
night. Why didn't you finish iti'
~ couldn't; the lamp went out"
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1890-11-13
tn. Es,enc. of Philosophy,

ufIvos sor question dot could nefcr au.
swer,
Uf vos got think, but could not schpoke
e.;
Uf l ybs wanted Something's. und some Won
says you cant, sir
Ivos ohoost put lin mine pipe und sohmoke
H.
Uf some Won snysdcy Gifts mo Something's. und
don't do ",
Uf vos make u promise und vos proko II,
Or vos try hig ohob, una could not quite
get drun It.
l vos choost put It In mino Pipe und sohmokc
10.
Uf l yps got bnd lucNnoss. und could not
Nonoe pcschtOp IL,
Uf vns got ambitious, und vos no chance
Co woke a.;
UfI vos lur elm maedohen. und vos not nerves
TO pop IT.
l vos ohoost put II In mino pipo una sohmoko
II
-, bcnpstt in Light
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1890-11-13
Wouldn'tDo

Committee Man ito pnbllc school tsacher)-
We was thinin' OF putin up nice motto over
your desk 10 encourage the children. How
would knowledge is Wealth" dot
School Teaoher-That wouldn't do. The
children know how small my salary IA
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1890-11-13
VOTE BY COUNTIES.

The following are the Official re-
turns from tho counties so far heard
from:
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1890-11-13

wonsa are the most consistent patrons Of
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01
THE NOISY DRUM.
1t Is Ancient Instrument That All Ma
lions Use.

1t Is az: Ancient Instrument That All Ma
lions Use.
They have got little barrels,
The heads be kivered wiz leather;
They beats upon 'eln VII little clubs.
To call their folk together
Thus somebody described the first APP
pearance of the Briti>,' SELLERS sent to
America to quell the rebellion Of the
colonists.
Since that time the English drum
heaters have attained such precision in
their art that it is stated that if all the
drummers in the British army were col
lected together, Icy would go through
with all the beats in use (therc arc tif-
teen principal ones) in perfect time.
Could our drummer boys do that?
The drum is at home in almost all ma
TONS
The Laplanders venerate their sacred
drums. These are followed from piece
of pine or birch trunk. and covered at
one end. A portion of the wood on tho
under sido is left for a handle.
Tho ancient Ro~lans used hand
drums in their religious dances, and
more than thousand years ago other
nations used them to give signals in
war.
In Asia, immense kettle-drums are
carried across the backs Of camels in the
trains Of all crowned heads. The drums
are adorned with gorgeous trappings,
and a seat is prepared for the player
upon the cancels back.
The musicians Of Hindostan play very
deXtcrously on a very small pair of l1ct-
tle-drums, called toublabs, which arc
fastened before them by lengths Of
cloth wound several times around the
body. They are beaten with the fingers.
Single drums, beaten with two sticks Of
hard wood, are sometimes used to
frighten away tigers.
Drums used in Hindoo religious pro-
cessions are called doles. They are
made of baked earth, are sometimes a
yard long, and twice as large at the
center as at either end. Kettledrums
are thin copper basins or bowls, COW
cred with parchment or calf-skin, which
is held in place by an iron hoop.-N. Y
| Mail and Express.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01
FROM DIST ANT DOMAINS.

RUSSIA has taken ono further step in
the adoption of modern improV cmCnts,
and announces the introduction of in
,tcrnational money orders good for three
months.
THE courts of AlSace lately sentenced
GAG young Alsatians to terms of imp1is-
onment of six months each for seeking
to emigratc secretly TO America, their
desire to leave tho country being con
strued as an attempt to cvado military
duty.
THE heir apparent of the Japanese
empire having become of legal age,
eleven years, recently was given a sword
which is said to have been kept in the
imperial family for nearly 1900 years,
and installed in an office that will en-
title him to be called Colonel or some
thing of that kind.
THE Armenians in the province of
Alashgerd recently sent u petition to
the Shah of Persia asking permission to
| cmigrate to that country in order to cs-
cape the oppression of the Turks. The
Shah not only asscntCd, but granted
lands to the petitioners, besides offering
them money to assist in the work of Gull
tivation.
THE cremation furnace in Perc-la-
| Chaise Cemetery, in Paris is now COM
plete, and tho Project of the Seine has
approved the scale of charge to be en-
| forced thcreat. The charge for the use
| of the cremation furnace is to DO fifty
| francs, which sum includes the keeping
| in the columbarium of the funeral urn
containing the ashes for a period of five
years.
TIE number Of cloistcrs and monks in
Spain have increased with astounding
| rapidity of late years. Spain now has
| 1920 monks and $4,000 nuns in 1 1916
| cloisters and 179 orders. In Barcelona
alone there are 1913 cloisters for women
In the last fourteen years the number OF
monks in Spain has boon scxtuplcd and
| tho number of nuns has been doubled.
A REMARKABLE find was lately made
at ST. Pabu, Finisterre. On removing g
granite block to tho southwest of the
village Roman Hanged tile was oh.
| served which had, apparently, served as
a cover to q box of wood, now fallen int
decay. Inside were found over ten thou
sand small plated Roman coins of Vale
rian, Diocletian, Constantinus, Maximus
Lucinius, Constantine the Great and
Constantinus II. They are all we'll pre-
served, and date from 26O to $50.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01
WHY WOMEN LOSE MONEY.
While Shopping They Become Too Much
Engrossed with Bargains.

While Shopping They Become Too Much
Engrossed with Bargains.
1t is easy to see that all those hand
some, fashionably stamped leather porte
monaies, strapped and clasped beyond
pcradventure of mishap, as we'll as the
long, cunningly knitted silken purses,
aftily linked to defy light and honest
fingers alike, are made exclusively for
feminine use. No one ever hears OF a
man keeping his money in any thing OF
the sort.
Now, those who have taken the
trouble to observe soman's tactics
when shopping are familiar with the
stereotyped rules she follows, and the
poorest rogue has shrewdness enough to
avoid them when first entering an es-
tabliShment.
Get a shop-girl to describe how loftily
Indifferent, languidly disdainful or cold
ly neglectful ninety-nine women out of
hundred look when they first step in
off the street. Then they have them
selves we'll in hand, a firm purchase on
parasol and purse, and green clerk
would wonder what on earth ever
brought such dilettanti in to be bored.
Before ten steps have been taken,
however, those wary glances have been
ensnared Bargains boldly set forth on
the center counter fetch a glow of ami
nation into listless faces, and every dig
nified muscle is relaxed as the light Of
trade shines like lamp in either eye.
Here the fray begins. The thrifty
shopper goes hard to work to see how
| much stuff she can get for the smallest
| amount. Bangs slowly dampen and I'M
| curl, powder fades as though it had
| never been, collars melt, mitts creep
| stealthily down the arm, walls moisten
| and part asundcr and yet never does the
| ardent buyers attention relax for mo-
| ment
Inspired by the devotion to the bust
ness in hand, she works faithfully and
we'll; every thing is forgotten save that.
| ten cents difference on the embroidery,
and as is invariably the case, patience,
and perseverance conquer all difficulties.
Flushed with triumph, reveling in the,
victory that will create envy in the
bosom of every woman friend, she
promptly turns to count out the neces-
sary nicksls.
Abomination of desolation Where in
Heavens name is her pocketbool1?
With feverish anxiety every article
up and down the counter is overturned,
tossed ruthlessly about or pushed hasti-
ly aside in one vain effort to catch a
glimpse of its beaded fringe OF oxidized
clasp.
During this prolonged hunt every
man, woman and child is suspiciously
eyed No one knows or has seen any
thing of the mislaid purse, but sudden
ly the light of conviction makes the
whole thing clear.
The robbed woman sinks helplessly
on the nearest stool and tells of those
two well-dressed blondes who sand
wiched her between them at the en-
broidery counter. Too absorbed to no
tice aught beyond their Sympathetic en-
thusiasm over the goods she had iostled
and jammed about with this result.-At.
lanta Constitution.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01
THE CARDINAL FOILED.
How One of Richelieu's Intended Victims
Was Accidentally Saved.

How One of Richelieu's Intended Victims
Was Accidentally Saved.
Dumont, the proprietor of a small fac
tory in Paris. one day received a polite
invitation to take supper with Cardinal
Richclieu at his country residence. Du-
mont was somewhat surprised, as he had
no acquaintance with the Cardinals; how
ever. he made his preparations for the
trip, and mounting his mule one after
noon he started for the Cardinals villa.
Dumont had scarcely left Paris when
a tremendous storm overlook him, and
he was obliged to seek shelter in tav-
crn. He was warming himself by tho
fire when a second traveller, who had
been overtakcn by the rain, entered.
While the two strangers were drying
their clothes by the fire. they entered
into conversation with each other, dur
ing the progress of which Dumont men
toned his proposed visit to the Cardinal.
''Iiavc you ever said any thing to
awaken the cnmity Of the Cardinal"'
asked the stranger of Dumont.
Not that | know Of Well, now
como to think of it, l believe that did
say something about the death of tho
Duke de Montmorcnci."
And your name is Dumont?'
''Ccrtainly, that's my name
'NOu seem to be an honest man,
Monsieur numont, SO let me give you
some advice. Don't go to Cardinal
Richelieu's. You are mistaken in his
object of inviting you to supper. He is
going to have you hung"
THAT is not possible!"
81 know better. for am the man who
is expected to hang you"
Dumont recoiled with horror.
'Who are you?" he asked.
Il am the public cXecutioncr. l have
| received an order to come to his country
| house to hang you. Overtaken by the
storm, like yourself, l sought shelter in
| this inn. Your honest face impressed
me. and l determined to save you. The
| Cardinal frequently calls on me to do
things l abhor, and l am about to give
up my position. You had better take
my advice, return to Paris as soon as
| possible, and get out of the country if
| you can. l hope you will remember
| that | have done you good service,
and the least indiscretion on your part
| may cause my ruin"
| Dumont thanked the eXecutioner,
| mounted his mule and returned to Paris
| as fast as he could travel. He then
went to friend to whom he intrusted
his secret. By the liberal use of money
he obtained a forged passport and
finally reached England in disguise,
where he lived until after the death OF
| the Cardinal, which occurred two years
later.-From the German.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01
Mr. RJxBY'S PATENT.
It Was a Good Thing. But Needed Few
improvements.

improvements.
"By Jove! I've an idear' said Mr..
Bixby gleefully, while at the dinner
table the other day. Nov here we've
suaut half orr time while at the table
passing things to each other and it's all
nonsense. | know just how it can all
be done away with and I'll have the
thing patented before month and
make mint of money out of 1T. I'm go
ing to put in all my spare time on 1T and
I'll soon show you a model of one of the
clevcrcSt inventions of the age
Mrs. BiXby did not say any thing.
She was accustomed to outburStS of this
kind on the part of Mr.. BiXby, who was
frequently seized with a mania for in
venting and patenting something, and
as he had always recovered without
mortgaging the house or iniuring any OF
the family. she hoped all would end
we'll this time.
Three days later, after he had worked
most of the night before, he came to
Mrs. Bixby with his latest CLEVER in
vention."
"You see. my dear, what it is" he
said calmly as he gave it a whirl. '1t's
revolving dining-room table, to dc
away with this eternal passing of things
| to each other. When you see any thing
out of reach that you want, all you have
| to do is to give the table a gentle little
whirl. and there you have the dish you
want right in front of you, Now what
do you think of that, my dear? Don't
you think our fortune is made, oh?
1T might work, Elijah" replied Mrs.
Bixby calmly, IF you could make sew
eral little improvements"
what improvements snapped out
Bixby.
well, tell me, please, where your
own plate would be when the dish you
wanted had been whirled around in
front of you?'
! "Why, I-I-it-'
"And where would the rest of our
plates bc?"
well, 1 never thought of that. L
Il suppose, my dear, there might be
some sort of a signal given by which al
the others could grab their plates ant
hold on to them when the table was
about to be whirled, or we might"
Take care, Harriet Amanda Bixby
don't yon go too far now"'
''Or we might-why, Elijah, what dc
you mean by throwing valuable paten
like That into the tre?'
"What do l mean, woman? You'll
know what l mean when you're left
despiSrd grass widow with six young
ones to look out for! And that is jus
what will happen, as sure as sheol i
you open your mouth again. Laugh now
Giggle! litter. Tee-hee some more
can't you? Darn a woman, anyhow!'--
| Time.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01
DR.. .SACE''S CATARRH REMEDY
cures the worst cases, no matter of how long
standing. so cents, by druggists.
ERIDEN, WATERBURY, & CONNECTICUT
WI RIVER RAILROAD.

MERIDEN, W WATERBURY, & CONNECTICUT
WI RIVER RAILROAD.
In EFFECT SEPTEMBER IS, 1889.
FROM WATERBURY TO CROMWELL.
Lea> Waterbury, New England station, s;55 am,
1855, AGO. 6.42 p. IN.
Leave Waterbury, Dublin street. 500 a. H.. elo
AIN; lao, Az, *7:O7 p. m.
Leave Meriden, $3.50 m, ST, 5:45 p. m,
FROM CROMWELL TO WATERBURY.
Leave Cromwell, 63O a. NJ, 1913 4:2Opm
Leave Meride West Main street, 7:O2, $50 a, m.
12:51 500, 6:35 N.
Arrive at Dublin street, TAO, ".11 a. M 1885, $50
1:3J p. m.
Arrives Waterbury, N. E. station. 1858, 1926 a. M,
100, 6:U5, sos p. IN.
*For Meriden and way stations ouly, arrive al
1852 p. m.
All trains arrive at and leave West Main street
Meriden.
CHAS. NJ. CRAWFORD, Supt.
Merden, Conn
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01

THE Boston Herald would like to obtain
the opinion of James G. Blaine as to the
ting his foot in it rs speaker of the house.
Mr. Reed naturally comes into compari-
son with Mr. Blaine, who was his prede-
cessor in office from the state of Maine,
and is acknow lodged on all hands to
have been one Of the most successful
speakers the house ever had. Mr. Blaine
also is understood not to love Mr. Reed
any better than the scripture en- Joins.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01
HE MARCHED WITH SHERMAN
TO THE SEA:

Trudged all the way on foot, over mountain
and through morass carrying knapsack and
gun, slept on brush heaps to keep out of the
mud caught cold, from the effects of which
his friends thought he would never recover
Lingering with slow consumption for many
covery advertised in a country newspaper.
and he determined to try it.. A few bottles
cured him. Always too Independent to ask
his country for a pension, he now says he
saved himself! Consumption is Lung-scrof-
ula. For scrofula, in all its myriad forms, the
discovery is an uncqualed remedy. It
cleanses the system of all blood-taints from
whatever cause arising, and cures all Skin
and Scalp Diseases. Salt-rheum, letter. Ecze-
ma. and kindred ailments. 1t is guaranteed
to benefit or cure in all diseases for which it
ID recommended or money paid for it will
be refunded. Sold by druggists.
Copyright. 1885, by WORLDS DIS. MED. ASSN.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01
Weather Indications.

wAsH'NGTov Feb l. For New England:
Fair; clearing in Eastern Massachusetts;
westerly winds: colder tonight and to-
morrow.
For Eastern New York and New jersey:
Light local showers.
For Western New York; Colder: fair
NorthWesterlY winds;
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01

-"Gentlemen," said an eminent Aus
tralian lawyer recently, ''the case for
the Crown is a mere skeleton-a mere
skeleton, gentlemen; for as l shall pres
emily show, it has neither flesh, blood
nor bone in it. On another occasion be
solemnly declared that verbal agree
ment is not worth the paper it is writ
ten on"
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01
And lie Probably Did.

Impecunious Dude-I'd like to put
this gold-headed cane in soak.
Pawnbroker examining it and hand
ing it back)- that case l guess you'll
have to keep on carrying one end of it
in your mouth, my friend.-Chicagc
Tribune
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01

NEW YORK has evidently got to pay
q heavy penalty for being democratic
city. The worlds fair is altogether too
big a plum for republican congress to
give to the unfaithful.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01
Quite a Difference.

american girls come cheaper than
Circassian maidens."
"What do you mean?"
"Why, the Sultan of Turkey buys Cir
cassians, but we often read of American
girls being presented to Queen Vic
toria."-N. Y. Sun.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01
a Word for Mothers.

Mothers, let us bear in mind that
what we desire our children to become
we must be before them. If we wish
them to grow up kind, gentle, affection
ate, upright and true, we must habitu-
ally exhibit the Same qualities as regu-
lating principles in our conduct, be-
cause these qualities act as so many
stimulants to the respective faculties in
the child. If we can not restrain our
own passions, but at one time over
whelm the young with kindness and at
another surprise and confound them by
our caprice and deceit we may with as
much reason expect TO gather grapes
from thistlcs or figs from thorns as to
develop moral purity and simplicity Of
character in thcm.-lIousehold.
What the Trouble Was.
"You look weary" said one travelling
man to another.
II feel it,"
MAY be your dinner didn't agree with
YOU"
'No, that isn't it. My wife and dis
agree. "-Merchant Traveller.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01
PRUNEs AND TIL TARIFF.


A strong effort is being made by the
California fruit growers to have tariff
tax Of three cents per pound imposed
upon Prunes, the claim being that Il
very large quantity of cheap foreign
prunes enter this market, and are sold al
such low prices that the Californi,.
fruit growers cannot afford to compete
While this is true, these gentlemen neg
lect to state that the cheap prunes are OF
low grade in quality, and that the
higher grades, with which the Cab
fornia fruit would naturally rank, hav,
been entirely driven from the American.
market by prunes grown on the Pacill,
slope. For the quality they actual,
raise the Californians have now the en-
tire market. What they desire is thai,
those who cannot afford to pay but e.
few cents a pound for prunes shout.
either be forced to 60 without them 0.
purchase the better, but very muci.
more expensive, California fruit.
NEWS OF THE DAY.
w. II. Turner, superintendent OF the
New York New Haven and Hartford
Railroad, is dead.
The strike Of glassworkorS at Cob
long, Bohemia, is spreading. The mill
tary are preserving oI"er.
The United States squadron of evo-
luton is expected at Toulon early this
month to remain three weeks.
The trial Of Ernr t Bcnzon for frau d
and forgery has been postponed woek.
The ablest advocate in Nice has becn
retained for the defense.
The sale OF the pawtucl,et, r. l.,
Times to Mr.. -. q. Black will prob
ably not be cOuSummated Tho latest
report Is that the salo is off.
The scullcrs Matterson, Of England
and Kemp. OF Australia, are matched
to row race on the laramatta course
in April for 81, 900 II side.
Mrs. Louisa Rocistroh, the vito of
the Rev. Johannes Rockstroh, tho pas.
tor Of the German fpiscopalian Cnurc h
in Newark, n. j.. died in Lakewood.
Tho jury in the Michael Kennedy
murder case at Syracuse, n. Y, brought
in a verdict OF guilty. lie was sentenced
to life imprisonment. Kennedy killed
his wife last Thanksgiving Day.
A raid was made on rendezvous oil
tramps in Newark, n. j.. and /. were
ASShSe up' Wv VI wv "CIS
turned over to Truant Officer Haynes
and the other 10 were sent to jail fol
90 days.
William Halliday, OF Franklin, N. j.,
employed as brakeman on the Eric
railroad fell from the top Of car al
che West End tunnel, Jersey City, and
was horribly manglod. three cars pass
ing over him. Death was instanta
neouS.
Samuel Eberly, n prominent and in.
huential citizen, died in Hampton
township, Pa, from severe attack Of
la gr ppo, aged ~ years. AT the time
Of his death he was member of the
board OF directors of the First National
Bank Of Mechanicsburg.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01

Try Phelan's Cream Java Coffee at
30 cents. Remember the number is 81
East Main street, Platt's block.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01

SAYS Congressman Mckinley: We
settled one question at n great deal of
cost-that the minority c. uld not rule
in this country. And we intend to set
tie, if we can, in the broad light of pub
lie opinion and in the presence of sixty
millions of people, whether the constitu-
tional majority Of this house shall do
the business of the house.
Senators Hawley and Plat, who are
in position to know, should hasten to in
form Mr. Mckinley that minority rule is
still in order in old Connecticut
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1890-02-01

BOULANGER'S NEGLECrED WIFE.
No more pathetic spectacle confronts
the eyes of the world, says the Paris
Figaro, than that of Nine Boulanger
Here is a sad, though handsome face, IN
which pain has cut more lines and
grooves than time, while to listen to he,
low, sweet voice is to wonder how the,
general can endure passing any of his
days beyond the reach of its subtle
music. She is n gentle little heart
broken lady, from whom the iron hands
Of ambition has clutched all that she
found best in love. And she has not
even the satisfaction of knowing that
the man who turned t., sunshine of her
earlier days into the black desolation Of
the present ever gives her single
thought. "It is HOT ;or me to Judge
him." she sometimes says when some
one accosts her concerning him eve
loved each other once ! Some day." sine
usually adds, she Will need my love
again. / do not wish to be divorced
from him because | want to retain the
right to care for him VIII IL all the rest
OF tho world forsakcs hin-when, save
his wife, he has no friends
Telegram-herald., 1890-06-11
Motions and Resolutions.

by AID. STEIN:
Resolved. By the Common Council of tne
city of Grand Rapids. that the grading and
graycl.ng Of Rumscy stree IA publ cfstreet.
ia the city - Grand Rapids. from the vest
liuc ~ Hilton street. IN said CTS. - the east
line OF Graudvil,e avenue. in said ctv. inc.u1-
llg the construction Of paved gatters .n SID
described portion Of said kumscy street .ud
also intending the construction 81 tbc ucces
sary bridges. culverts. crosswalks man-holes.
catch-baslus approaches and cesspoois ia said
described portion Of said Rumscy street.
IS p necessary public improvement.
Adopted.
Yeas-AIH. Anderson. Carpenter. Creeus.
Dor.u Doyle. Emmer. Hsuser. MIer Mills
Mckee. O'D1nueu saunders. stein. stokes
I -proa'. stcbbins. stryker. Tsfsum. Turner.
/ lrrs-I
Nays-Nooe
/ Hy Alf. -1RIKER;
Resolved By the Common Council ~ the
/ cifv a. Grand Rauiis. that the graGlaE and
f gravoling of Oakland avenue. "a pUhIc street
T in tho city 90 Grsud Rapids. from tae south
/ ane ~ Wealthy avenue. = public rre.t in
l in said city. % -B" street. q psaI'o & o 10
T said city. ior.udiuz fhs construction oI the
/ necessary paved cutters. bridges. c1Ferts
4 cras.rsfks. man holes. rsf. basins ar
/ prracha and oeesreo's iu sa.d described urr-
+ t.on oi said Oakland avenue. isa Necessary
PUBL improvement
Adopted
Tess-Aa. Anderson. Carpenter. Creque
\ Dereo. DeT.e. Emner. Hs1ser. Iale- H1s
Mchff uu.nrff SENDER. -te -tetes
I -rrouf ststbas 5t1ker. Iafeen. Turner.
Ie~eE-tt
Nays- Sore
Us hid. -rRTKER-
co @ H.a