The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1890-05-15
BRIGHT BITS.
DON'T ask for kisses; kissing has
A more presumptuous SAVIOR,
Than bodily to embrace the lass;
For kissing goes by favor"

For kissing goes by favor"
philadelphia Press.
IL MAN is made of dust, McGinty's name must
be mud by this time.-Puck.
FORWARD WArcH-Eight bells and all's we'll
Seasick Old Lady-He wouldn't say so if he
knew how badly felt.-L(fe.
That emblem OF domestic happiness-thep par
Tor carpeJ-wil soon be flung to the breeze and
the man of the house will be asked to beat it il
he can.-Chicd0o Globe.
JUDGE-How do you earn a livingg
Italian Prisoner-M raisa tabaco.
You raise tobaccoH
"Yessa. Me raisa i'm from de gutta. Terds
Siftinos.
SALEsLADY-For a garden hat, madam, the
one you are trying on is hardly large enough.
Now this would be much better.
Customer-Oh. no. That wouldn't do at all
Our garden is very small.-B0stOn Beacon.
WHY don't you ask the guests if thew will
have some? asked MRS. Gazzam of her hus-
band, who was handing the pastry around in
silence.
Because we never speak as we pass pie"-
Judge.
law joke when the Angel Gabriel blew his horn
This is the seventeen million, five hundred and
twenty -one thousand, four hundred and sixty
seventh time have been reSurrected. ~ Wash
ington Post.
Mr. OLDBUCK-Woman, you have disgraced
mel Do you hear? Disgraced me-
His Young Wife-Why, dear, am sure that
it was only an innocent chat we had. was not
flirting indeed was not.
Mr.. Oldbuck-Oh, don't mind your flirting
You are built that way. But you told that
young sprig was your father.-Terre Hdlte
Cypress.
SHE was young thing-or rather she wished
people to think she was-and this as she
listened to an air that had great though tenn
porary popularity many years before, was
what she said;
''Ah, that strainl how well recall it, asso-
ciated as it is with some OF the pleaSantest days
of my childhoodr'
He was a horrid brute OF a man. and as he
located the same air in the dim abysm of the
past, this was what he said:
Indeed! indeed!' Here he paused, then
drawled. What a phenomenal memory you
must haver
And deponent further saith not.-Christiau
at Work.
THERE is an elderly lady in Cass avenue who
is rich but peuurious. At one of the recent
notable theatrical events at the Detroit opera
house she went early in order to secure good
| seat. She was the first person to present her
self at the gallery door. AS the crowd began to
arrive she held on to the door knob.
Il guess am sure to get front seat" she
remarked to a gentleman behind her.
1T looks that way" he said.
For half an hour she stood there and never
once relinquished her grasp on the door knob
At e:30 o'clock the door was unbolted and
opened. The old lady had calculated on its
opening in. but it proved otherwise, and to her
CONSERVATION she found herself pushed behind
the door while the crowd entered. 1t was not
| until the last person had rushed in that she was
released from her uncomfortable position
Grasping aud adjusting her false hair she ran
up the stairway, shaking her umbrella at the
man at the door.
Il want a front seat. she said.
'They are all taken, ma am"
But was the first one at the door"
"Well, you are the last one upstairs"
81 insist on having afrent seat"
II couldn't accommodate you, ma am unless
some one will vacate his seat"
The old lady fumed, but to no purpose. and
finally took seat on the seventh row, reciting
her grievances between the acts in a loud tone
of voice to her nelghbors.-D Free Press