davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1890-09-06
If I WE'RE THE GAR.
i'll were the ear.

| If were the ear,
wouldn't scnddo Siberia
Every man could find whom thought m
superior.
Wouldn't paddock the lips of my best mon O
letters,
Flog women to death, and prt old men il
fetters
| And | wouldn't ride around in a powder
proof car
II were the car.
III were the ear,
would rule so benignly
That men would all say" Why. you're dom:
finelyl'
For Id drive all the men who say. in hot
weather.
Is this hot enough" in the river together
And Id let them cool off while [ gigs.cd
"Ha, Ha!"
If were the car.
If ! were the ear,
And could rule arbitrary.
And impose my commands upon Tom Dick
and Harry.
would drive Il sharp. slick, and Strengthening
sabre
Right through the lett ear of my flute playn.
neighbor.
And then carry his scalp Oh my triumphal
ear
II were the ear
III were the ear,
And wanted to snore.
And my fve-o'ciock neighbor got ont his
lawnmower.
And went rattngaround while his ncighbors
were sleeping.
I'd give him right up to my constable's
Keeping,
And tell him TO brusa him. and bauish him
II were the car
II were the car,
would make people like me,
And not try to shoot me- and slap me. and
strike me:
But the fatally fluent I-told-vou-so fellow.
I'd run through a wringtr until he WAS mel
low,
And send him back home. G. o. D., to his ma.
If were the ear
II were the ear.
d adiudge with good reason.
All men who talk tariff as guilty of treason.
Aud that cruel musical monster. the Nero.
no whistled "McGinty" should follow his 1
hero: /
He should 60 down and down where the
White mermaids are.
IL | were the ear.
rs. ". Foss, in Yankee Blade.
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1890-09-06

A scheme of the French Government
to encourage the intermarriage of life.
convicts in New Caledonia with life.cop.
victs imported from the prisons at home
is pronounced mischievous by the London
Lancet. The purpose is to build up
family relations in the interest of mo.
rality; but British experience is to the
effect that such alliances lead to the
multiplication of criminals, and that ths
real check to crime lies in breaking I'D
and isolating the criminal class. Testi-
mony CLEANED by NJ. Louis Barron from
the journals of New Caledonia points in
the same direction, and forms an in.
structive commentary on the law of
heredity as deduced by Darwin.
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1890-09-06

Nothing in this country more astonishes
an English university-brcd man, asserts
the Chicago Herald, than our college
yelis. He never takes the practice as
bit of American fun, but seriously sets
to work to prove now even educated
Americans follow the customs of the say-
age Indian, his varhoop being perpetu.
ated in the college yell.
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1890-09-06
PRIVATE SIMMONS.

Corporal Slanc of the British regiment
stationed in India. was engaged to be-
married to Miss Jhansi McKenna. He
had secured his colOnel's leave. and. be-
ing popular with the men, every arrange
ment had been made to give the wedding
what Private Ortheris called "eeklar. -
1t fell III the heart of the hot weather,
anil after the wedding Slane was going
| upt to the hills with the bride. None the
less, Siane's grievance was that the affair
would be Onl y hired carriage wedding.
and he felt that the "ecklar" of that was
mcagrc. Miss Mckcnna did not care so
much. The scrgeant's wife was helping
her to make her wedding dress. and she
was very busy. Slanc was just then the
only moderately contcnted man in bar
racks. All the rest were more or less
miserable.
Aad they had so much to make them
happy,to All their work was over at
o'clock in the morning. and for the rest
of the day they could lie on their backs
and smoke Canteen plug and swear at
punkah- coolies. They enjoyed fine.
full flesh meal in the middle of the day.
and then threw themselves on their cots
and slept until it was cool enough to 20
out with their Z" towny," whose vocabu-
larry contained less than 600 words. and
the Adjective, and whose views on every
conceivable question they had heard
many months before.
There was the Cantecn. of course and
there was the Temperance Room. with
the second hand papers in it: but man
OF any profession cannot read for eight
hours day in temperature of SO or %
degrees in the shade, running up some
times to 1903 degrees at midnight. Very
few men even though they get "a pannikin |
OF fiat stale muddy beer and hide it under |
their cots. can continue drinking for six
hours day. One man tried, but he |
died, and nearly the whole regiment /
went to his funeral, because it gave them
something to do. It was too early for
the modified excitement of fever or
cholera. The men could only wait, and /
wait and wait, and watch the shadow of
the barrack creeping across the binding
white dust. That was gay life
They loungcd about cantonmcnts-it
was TOO hot for any sort of game, and al
most too hot for vicc-and fuddled them
serves IN the evening, and filed them
selves to distcntiou with the healthy
heterogeneous food provided for them. and
the more they stocked the less exercise
they took and the more explosive they
grew. Then the tempers began to wear
away, and men fell a-brooding over in
suits real or imaginary. They had moth
ing else to think of. The tone of the
"repartees" changed, and instead of
SAYING light-heartedly: "Tll knock your
silly face in, men grew laboriouslv polite
and limited that the environments were
not big enough for themselves and their
enemy, and that there would be more
space Io- one Of the two in place which
ii Is not polite TO mention. I
II may have bcou Satan who arranged
the thing, but the fact OF the case is that
Private lesson had for long time been |
"o.r, ins Private Simmons in an aimlcss ,
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1890-09-06

General Greeley, of the Signal Service
Bureau, does not think that this country
will suffer any extraordinary damage
from tornadoes. He says that the build
ings destroyed are generally of an un-
substantial character. Strong, old
fashioned houses would stand almost
any wind storm.
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1890-09-06

The prevailing epidemic of homicide,
Including suicide. will shortly demand
the attention of the State, declares the
New York Sun, for at its present rate
the artificial mortality will begin to af-
feet our vital statistics.
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1890-09-06
country.

The city of Philadelphia makes a
profit of more than 81, 900, 900 year by
supplying gas to the consumers, besides
having the entire city lighted free of
cost.
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1890-09-06

France has half as many people as the
United States, but her national debt is
twice as great as ours.
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1890-09-06

Progressive agriculture is said TO be as
far advanced and fully developed in
Western New York as any section of this
country.
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1890-09-06

The Treasury Department at Washing
ton has received an unusually large
amount of conscience money" lately.
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1890-08-06
TO LOCK THE GATES.
Morrow's Bill for Absolute Elk
clusion Of Chinese.
ONLY DIPLOMATS MAY ENTER.
favorable Report Of the House Commit-
tee. win Dissent BY Hitt, the
Coolies Friend.

WAsHMoroN orrY. AuR. 6-Repfesentative
Morrow of alhoxnia. from the committee on
foreign affairs, has reported to the House his
bill TO absolutely prohibit the coming Of Chi
jects Of the Chinese emperor or otherwise Tho
bill proposes to Include all Chinese, even those
who may leave the United States aud attempt
TO return, except diplomatic and consular and
commercial sgents, and the coming OF Chinese
70 the United States for transit il expressly pro.
hibited. A fne Of 500 for each Cinnamon
brought into the United States Is provided for
the punishment Of the vessel and master bring
Ing tn m In and any such vessel win be subject
to forfeiture. provision Is made for the pun
ishment OF persons aiding Chinese TO enter the
United States by land or otherw De, and for the
removal OF Chinese found unlawfuliy In the
United States. Further prov siou ID made that
Chinese shall not be admitted to citizenship
In itg report the commit ee, further reviewing
the history OF past legislation, says that the act
had not long been in forcs when It was discov-
cred that systematic efforts were being made to
evade its terms Of exclusion. and In 1888 there
were landed ct San Francisco alone SOFA Chi
nesc, including large class who were without
certificates but claiming TO have been in the
country at the date of the treaty. They we're
permitted to land under habeas corpus issued
by courts. The act of October, 1858, provided
against the return Of laborers, bat did not pro-
vide against the coming Chinese who never
were In the Urited States.
The bill now under consideration proposes
to settle that question. II makes
exclusion permanent and effective. The report
refers to the disposition shown to reopen the
question of the propriety OF exclusion based on
the statement that Chinese are never found in
prisons or poorhouses. and are peaceful citizens
In answer to these statements, tables produced
show that in ten years q. 165 Chinese were ar
rested In San Francisco. and the statement
made by the chief of police is to the effect that
Chinese commit more crimes In proportion
than any race In the city. and that they are
vicious. immoral and dangerous to the young
OF both s. xes of other races.
Chairman Hitte presents minority report
dissenting from the favorable action OF the
majority. The bill, as he says, IL in conf ct
with the treaty now In force, by which the faith
Of the United States 10 pledged, and which de-
clares that the United States may regu ate or
suspend such coming or residence, but may not
absolutely prohibit It."
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1890-08-06
CONVENTION OF CARP ENTERS.
Eight Hour Question the Great Feature
"A New Platform.


CHICAGO, Aug. 5.-Representatives Of the
Brotherhood OF Carpenters and Joiners Of the
United 8 ates commenced the session of the
national convention yesterday They have an
der consideration several important changes in
the constitution which was adopted eight years
ago. Mayor Cregier, Judge Tuley, and Others
address d the meeting.
Judge Tuley In his speech said that the meet
ing TO-DAY was an important one, and Il meant
the success of making eight hours day an es-
tablishet TACT to carpenters aud joiners in Chi
cago. He said there were some things, how
ever, radically wrong. There are two many
strikes and too much disorder. A strike
means an industrial war and rights founded on
violence are unstable. Rights should be reached
by legislation and not by physical force
The secretary's report showed that from 5000
members in 1856 the union had grown TO 1000,
distributed in ninety-four unions In thirty
nine cities eight hours In q days work, and at
23i places men work nine hours, while in
900 cities work for the day Is over 1t 4
o'clock. II il estimated that total increase in
the country has been $4,000 year. or from
Is to rs cents q day for each workingman
There were la strikes during the past year, and
in only eight cases were they unsuccessful
About 5000 was spent In sick and death ben
efts for members and their families
The carpenters occupied today as . commit
tee of the whole on revision of The constitution.
The old constitution was practically wiped out,
and. in the words of Secretary Mcguire, then
The eight-hour question was given q
prominent place. and strict enforcement of the
eighthour rule strongly urged. Secretary Ma
guire thought there was some probability OF
consolidation with the Amalgamatsd Brother
hood, which has its he headquarters in England.
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1890-08-06
THE POLICE COURTS.



THE Lake acknowledgment.
Mr. George r. Baldwin, Of the firm Of Baldwin.
Caleutt Blakely Publishing Company, OF
Chicago, who recently published Seattle Ilius-
trated." appeared before Justice Rivers yester-
day aud fled IN informa ion against James G.
CcimesniI, charging him with forgery. A war
RAFT for his arrest was issued and Is now In the
hands Of the constable for service. Colmesnil
solicited for the book without authority, and
made number of collections. These he re-
ceipted for. signing the publishers name. and
pocketed the money. The forgery consisted in
signing the firms name to the receipt Very
little is known Of Colmesnil. He Is sti In the
city, however, and will not enjoy his liberty
very long.
The case Of C. II. Hodge. the young iorger.
was continued again by Justice Rivers yester-
day, but will come up today. A telegram in
quirng If Hodge was ever an inmate of the
steilacoom asylum was forwarded to that insti-
tuition yesterday.
John Grsdale, proprietor Of the floating saloon
on lake Washington. near Kirkland, was held
to answer before the superior court by Justice
Miller yesterday, on nine connts of selling
liquor without license. Bail was fixed at $500,
which amount was furnished by Rdward
sweeney. Of the Claussen-Swseney Brewing
Co. At last. after many unsuccessful attempts,
Grisdale will have to stand trial for the o6ense
of which he has been motor ously guilty for
mon his past The police have done everythia
possible to close him ont. but in spite OF all. u
place 10 probably open again today. The pross-
cution made out strong, clear case yesterday
afternoon, and II the same evidence can be sub
mittsd sgainsf orisdals in the superior court he
win have to attend to his business BY proxy for
time.
The case Of David and Eddie Caffee. who stole
q watch from w. r. Peters. West Seattle fisher
man. WIN be called In Justice Millers court
-ssf -
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1890-08-06
ID NB OF NORTHWEST.
ftond Indians Forced to
Surrender Murderers.
~ DROWNED NEAR AsERpEEN,


5flnrour1 Mont, Aue. k--Hor some time past
i I1x71S - boon bfeuine 81 the r1nfhe6d lake
ssGnl1k within he past year fully half dozen
1If11o IN hoxo tnIlen Victims to Indian rifeG
~ U1In inssigators Ct these crimes were Pierre
4&1&1 "a f11aoo tNo Flathoad Indiana, who
1ilzIato 11eh thnt branch Of the Kootenai tribe
2l11or 0neof Aenes, whose camping ground -
go 1t IlnxheaA laka
q p - Sro s reward q 500 was offered by
- }orx15ofia1 governor for the capture Of the
4 90 m11nna bnt no one wouId risk their life
- 1916t % arrest them. Instead Of the In
fon6 tfylnk 10 escape capture, they became
~ 11oubIo1Cme, eu0 et dfderent times rails
$50 Wnd0 On Dettler9 cabins About
houth ego IN Indian arrested 1t
S Sn6mb ofnfed that white man had
n MED by en Indian named Pascalo, and
o6 Wlheeo the skeleton IVES concealed, an
6f6pont u which was given IN the PosT-INrELr
Sorn 1lepatcheA Two weeks later posse
fHl1Y men, aided b. company OF United
~ 6iofp, stn<ted Quito capture rascale, but
5loe - ~ pose and the soldiers not meeting
II ~ eoopoe tfue the expedition Was failure.
~ 1onan, 81 To rlathead agency, prom
- county authorities that he would turn
26< ~ renes1dse, Tief1e Paul, Lalacs and
- md eloo two other known murderers
r1o0n1oo he M slow about keeping. and
1In, oEsenfsed posee Of sixty men and
& a = ~ camp o. Chief Aeuas. reaching
{ 6lS y delook Nondey morning.
E ~ HIT the Iudiana were on the defensive, but
& = ~ tahen prieoner and. held until he or
SG I6ooale end two other mnrderers, named
11I6us end Antee, turned over to the sheriff.
~ 0oG done and the chtef given his liberty.
- 1h1oe Indians were PLACED In the county
f6l6oo md Piefrs Paul ~ now on the Fiat
49, reservation, md this morning Sheriff
40 md pose started out for their cap
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1890-08-06

California Athletic Club Will Match
DenOn ana Stranger.
Il Il more than probable that Joe Acton, the
1anaous WRESTLER who Il now IN this city, VIII
meet Evan LAWS. the stfeusler, now IN San
franchise, befors the California Afhletic Club In
: lew weeks The Little Demon last night ~
ceived the following dispatch:
Wrestler. VIII you wrestie Lewis for clnb pure
and how soon? Answer
FL. r. Fu1DA, Prex Cat Athletic Club"
Here is the reply sent hy Joe Acton:
sBEArTL1, Ans. AL X PuJdd, California
Athtetic GLIB, San Ffoncfsco: Yes. viii wrestle
Lewis in nx weeks. 81 40 pounds fox club
purse. Answer aud give full paricularA
'sJoE ACTON"
The conditions imposed By Acton may bar
the match.
Tho san Francisco Post Of late date says:
EVAN Lewis, speaking on the subject Of .
match with Joe Acton, said: I rec that Acton
wants me TO come down 70 10 pou lds. but
will not asree TO that / weigh about 1876
pounds now and / am willing 70 take ffteen
pounds Of that Of That won make me $50
pounds. and II got any lower than that I
fore, Il he hes made mp his mind to limit -
10 pounds It 10 no MSS Of AZ Offering any more
about the matter Lewis stated that on = pre-
yious occasion he reduced In weight, and when
be wrestled in match In Wisconsin he found
his strength had gone from him. Since then
he has determined not 20 be caught in similar
trap
Young Mitchell, besides being one Of the
cleverest middle-weight pugilf-ts living. IS by
no means poor wrestler, and his exhibition
with Joe Acton at the Standard last night was
the main attraction Of tho evening Mitch II
and Geogsn will spar this afternoon ct Corts
Casino, and tonight 1t the Standard.
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1890-08-06

MOUNT VERNON. Aug. 5-Court adjourned
last Saturday, after four weeks term, In
which over ghty cases were disposed OF. 1t be-
Ing the most important term Of court ever held
IN Skagit county, as there were several impor-
tant criminal and equity cases. beside the
usual amount Of " c&s There was mat
tendance last week on the court the
following Seattle attorneys J. 7. Ronald,
g. H. Piles, ]. r. Relfe General J. B. Metcalfe.
w. h. Andrews Judge r. : Greene. Judge
Turner. Messrs Strudwick. Allen and E~sly,
and Judge Rhen Smith. and II. A. Fairchild. of
Whsfcom. The next term OF court win be held
IN December.
The Mount Vernon Improvement Company
has nled ita articles of Incorporation. with Har-
yfson clothier,s Aidelbert Ford and Matt Me-
Elroy. Of Seattle, as trustees, and has COM
menced the construction Of several large build
INN.
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1890-08-06
Fifty-Five Bu.hel. Per A..

WArTsBURG Aug. st. ] Hollowel has iust
thresned thirty acres OF wheat which averaged
hity-five and a-fifth bushels per acre.
An Old pioneer named Downing died Of
dropsy at Alto Friday evening, and was buried
at Dayton.
saturday while Mesdamess George Wood and
XII Wincheli, with young babe, were riding
through a narrow space between the mill race
aud the Union Pacific railroad tracy. . freight
train came along and frightened the horses
the ladies were thrown out and Mrs. Woods
limbs caught in the wheel She was badly
bruised and received severe cut in one Knee
The Others were uninjured
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1890-08-06
rHEmor1vzrow.n OF THE rurUR.

Electricians of New York recently found
much food for speculation in the remark
said TO have been made by Henry Willard
Just before he sailed for Europe, that it
would he well to go cautiously in respect
to certain expenditures for locomotives,
because it was probable that within few
years the motive power OF every railroad
in the United States would be changed.
Another rsion OF the story is that, being
approached by man interes ed in the de-
velopment of new electrical discovery,
Mr.. Willard declaed after having exam
ined the same. that this country Is on the
eve of Z great mechanical and industrial
revolution. so great, in TACT as to do away
with steam as manufacturing and motive
power.-Oregonian, July %
The application of electricity to the
treatment of disease ID ia being revolu-
tioa zed, as demonstrated daily by Drs.
Darn at their rooms. corner Washing on
anu Fourth stree 5. Portland, as the follow
ing personal endorsems nts show beyond
any doubt. These cures were M de four
years ago, and show conciusi ely that
cures by electricity are permanent:
More People Cared I'm San Francisco.
Mrs. G. Cotter. "a Scott Place. s. F.
Mrs. E. Connell. 1.o12 Fillmore ST.. 8. F.
-Ue8lHeSSe Cureus
S. Harman's daughter. Santa Cruz--Deai-
ness; cured in two months.
Thomas Silk, $50 FIJI erl ST., s. F.-Deaf-
ness two years; restored.
]. Carr. 523 Howard ST., S. F.-Rheu-
matte, neura gia. and dyspepsia; restored.
Silas Gates. COS Pine St-Deafness two
wears; cured in ten minutes.
Miss Mary l. Cushman, Chico. Butte Co..
Ca.-Deafness four years; cured.
Henry Chintz. l Fargo Place, 3. F.
Deafness thirty-se en- years; cured.
James Anderson, Franklin, sacramento
Co., Cal.-Deafness OF long standing; re-
stored.
A. d. Cameron, 1853 Third ST., 8. F.
Rneumatis ii and nsuralgia for weeks;
cured in wo weeks.
w. w. Travallion. Baker City, Or. ex-
sheriff Of Baker Co., Or.-Deafness; cured
in three DAYS.
Tpomas McGraw, $40 Dav ST., s. F.
d afness six months; cured instantly.
Miss Nsttie Ro enshai. I.606 Stockton
St., b. F-Weskness of the optic nerve,
and catarrh. ten years; cured.
III G. Harris, ia William St., :. F.
Deafness and all sorts of ringing noises in
the ear. five years; cured in six weeks.
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1890-08-06
HALLER CITY

THERE IS point in the OF Washington that offers
such great advantages for the investment of small capital
does Haler City The Seattle, Lake Shore & Eastern
Railroad is being operated Halter City The contract
has been let the san Francisco Bridge CO. to construct
rsass wagon bridge the Slaguamsh River thereby
connecting the south and north forks The railroad company
building side track accommodate the vast amount OF
freight for this place
You buy lot for sIa5 that in six months will be
worth several times much Terms half cash and balance in
three and six months
Three hotels are being constructed fast men and
money work.
Five buildings also being built besides great
many dwelling houses
The postof7ce Of "Iaer City will open for business in
side of days.
newspaper will begin publication about September st
Two townships of part timber and part farming lands
being surveyed the and will be open to settle
The timber lands of great value owing to the inn
amount Of timber claim The farming lands in
this section invaluable producing hops in quantity and
quality equal not superior the celebrated White River
and Puyalup hop lands. Coal and minerals found in
quantities up the north fork of the river Prospectos
diligently work. and gold paying quantities has been found
in this fork.
Now the invest and reap rich results as it is i'm
possible make a mistake by investing in Haer City
Haer City is destined be great railroad center as it
offers the only practical crossing of the Saguamh River
Already has this been taken advantage of by the Seattle Lake
Shore Eastern Railroad and the Fahaven Southern and
the Great Northern have both preliminary surveys
ing the river here.
QuERYAt what other point possessing many natural
and acquired advantages you be assured of such good
suits upon the investment of small amount?