Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1890-11-28

pe IN our house.
You kin imagine my fceIin's better than
kin describe 'em, only | kept repe;itin all
night long, while Mrs Burrige and Mrs.
Snlithers held ne tight, by both arms:
eff jeremiah is hung must be hung
likewise, for advised him to DO his wust,
and he done it"
The keepin' room was an awful sight
next mornin'. The coroner, he come in
with his twelve jnrys-all neighbors-and
nothin wurn't expected but that I'd die,
and bein' the only witness | was obleesed
to answer what they asked, takin' my Bible
cath
But ever and constant repeated, 'IThat
he done was by my advice-hany me, not
him, or leastWise hang us BOTH And
while was repeatin' this the door opened
and in walked Il gentleman, kinder elderly
and fat, and six of them nedicated students
that had caused AL the trouble.
Coroner, have brought some wit
nesses," said the gentleman. Their state
mcnts will materially affect your verdict
swear 'em. "
So they were swore, and Mrs Burrige
and Mrs Smithers had to hold me again 10
keep me from flynn at 'en, and the first
that spoke was Il Young man named "Ben-
iamin Franklin Bunker" Said he was i9
years old
"a disgrace to your namesake and nine
ty in iniquity," said aloud.
"And what do you know about this here
murder, Mr.. Bunker?" says the coroner
"Well," says the young man. "it's only
q little joke of ourn."
(which" asks the coroner.
ooh, putin him there.' says the meeii-
Gated student.
Putin which there?' says the coroner
1.-THE cadavera," says the boy.
"Seein' the solemn occasion you needn't
use slang" says the coroner.
'Well,' says the boy, ''call it the body.
Pm from the college up here"-
lord knows you are,' says |.
'tAnd you KNOW said the boy, I'VE
have disseeting room. This body was
there for dissecting purposes = and we
wanted bit CT fun. We dressed it upand
took it down to old what's -his-name's''-
"You kin speak more respectful" says
the coroner.
"Mr jeremiah Popcorn's house, them"
said the medicated student. We knew
he'd cut a big stick for us, because we
knocked at his door, now and then"-
"Now and thenl Constant and contin-
ual," says |.
And we fixed it so he'd knock this cid
fellow ovcr"-
1.-THE deceased gentleman" said the cor
oner.
"And then we groaned," said the meti-
Gated student, land ran away We be-
lieved the old man would go into the house
and hide when he supposed he had killed
somebody, and we'd carry-er--him off;
but he took him in and went for the doc
tor who must be a smart chap, to think
the body was that of man just killed,
and we had to go back homo. There was a
deuce of fuss about Northumberland
party, and we had to own up. and that's
ALL"
mot quite" says the old gentleman, as
if he meant suthn' another petickeler,
and then the rest of the indicated students
gave their testimony, and everybody knew
that jeremiah had not committed Il muir
der after all But of all practicable jokes
them medicated students had got off. this
was the wust-
But one good thing came of it after ALL
They never troubled us no more, and
tisnt likely never will. Eff they do, Jere-
miah says, hayin' committed one crime.
or supposed he had for considerable spell.
he's kinder hardened, and they'd find him
dangerous.-Mary Kyle Dallas in New
York Ledger