Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1890-01-18
HOW TO GIVE GOOD DINNERS.
A Veteran Society Man Discourses
Upon an Interesting Topic.

! THE FIRST THISo TO CONSIDER Is YouR CON-
PANr, THE REST WILL COME OF ITSELF
CHOOSE YOUR GUESTS FOR THEIR MUTUAL Az
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. DEcAY1Sa AS AN Art.
"a perfectly managed dinner party is the
| highest expression of an enlightened civiliza-
| ton"
1t was veteran society man who spoke and
the half dozen younger fellows about the little
/ drinking table at the Meridian club listened re-
| spectfully to what he had to say.
| "A good dinner giver," the oracle went on,
must possess the social talent in its highest
| development. Anybody can give a tea-leave
the front door open and let the people come
| in. There is considerable knack in organlz-
ing ball, but even that makes itself a success
| II only the appointments are good. the people
| all OF one set and the rooms sufficiently
| spacious. Only real social philosopher, how
| ever-the person who has made study
| of the art of entertainments qualified to
| offer dinner. The dinner is necessarily
| stamped with the mark of host and hostess.
| Their company does not come together; it must
| be put together, and to accompany this well
and happily is indeed a science. For You must
remember that upon the makeup of the list
OF guests at the table chiefly depends the fes-
| tive enterprise"
Il quite agree" said one of the young men,
| HOW NOT TO DO IT.
"Why, it is an axiom. of course. The ordi-
airy dinner giver supposes that SO long as sat-
isfactory food is well served, with an accom-
paniment of good wines, he has a right to ex-
| pect that the entertainment will go charminglv
Last OF all the things he considers are the COM
pany and its arrangement; very likely he will
throw his guests in higgledy- plggledv in such a
way as to make every one miserable. He will
have the young girls taken in by married men;
people who have known each other so long and
| intimately that they have nothing new to mu-
tually communicate will find themselves seated
| together. The tactess host usually considers
this fine stroke. you know, and age will be
| mixed in with youth. the two having no interest
or feeling in common. This sort of business is
| unutterably distressing. The guests are COM
PEELED, whether they will or no, to submit to the
| misery, aud the sentiment aroused in their
breasts Is apt to partake of resentment as well
as disgust"
| THE WAY TO MANAGE A DINNER
| "Pray tell US how you would set out to give
dinner party?'
"WeIl, In the first place. 1 would-as l always
| do-have everything prepared bv nv own
| cook. know what she can do and where she is
apt to fail and 1 would make no experiments
| Having made the best possible arrangements
| about the menu, wines and general appointments
| l would set prayerfully about the all-importaut
| =
| must not only be agreeable Individually but
more important still, they must have a natural
| affinity for one another. l would have let lis
say, clever young Romish priest who has seen
the worId,an would put him next to a girl he
| has never met-the bright Miss Dash a Young
woman OF convictions and talent. Next | would
| have that gay young blade Thingumbob. who
has sneaky fondness for frivolous Miss What
ye-may-cal-it; would invite her too. and put
| them together. l would ask that solid old bow
| 1llnPQmailC. who pOl6-nOun,a6
tacles and takes life seriously and he would be
| startled and pleased as well to find himself
next to Miss Rapid.
| WHO Is JUST A BIT FAST.
And so 1 would go on, putting people as I'M
like as possible in the closest proximity, taking
care to select none but bright Ones the notion
being, as one might say, to bring the negative
and positive carbons of intelligence into con-
| tiguity, so that a brllliancy results 1t is a
! fortunate thing that one may invite guests to a
| dinner whom one would not welcome into his
set. For example. you know might with
| proprlety ask Henry George to dine with a
| party at my house. and he would doubtless be
a welcome addition; but it would hardly occur
to me to send him an invitation for a cotillon
even supposing that he danced the german
| You perceive the distinction. of course Thanks
TO II you can recruit your dinner company from
| much wider circle than your own, and it
| is unnecessary to remark that there are plenty
| of interesting people to be picked up outside of
| fashionable society. To wind up the dinner
arrangement we were speaking of | would take
| In the least important and desirable girl myself
MY wife, necessarily, would pick out the man
she liked best. Women, as hostesses are not
expected to sacrifice themselves in this particu-
| lar. When go to dinner party and find in
| my envelope the name OF the daughter of the
establishment l know that am recognized az
| the most important man there. But, if am q
! girl and pick up card that hands me over to
the master of the house. it is a bitter Dilf |
know that l am given to him because no other
| man Is likely to want me-"
THE ART CONVERSATIONAL
"Conversation, you argue, is the most i'm
! portant thing in making a dinner party sue
cessful?'
| Good conversaton-yes. Unhappily, the
art is almost lost one in this day. Listen to
| the conversation around dinner table and YOU
Will ma almost invariably that it partakes
! largely of shop. The guests are SO pervaded
| with the industrial spirit of the age that they
cannot lift their talk out of their business The
best conversationaists in Washington at pres
| ent are forelgners-men of leisure and cultiva-
| ton. An American never has any leisure, and
| his cultivation stops short when he leaves col
| lege. People In this country make too much
| money; they don't loaf enough. You NAV say
| what you please, but the highest refinement is
not attained without leisure. When a man has
| to work all the time he is unable TO pay proper
attention to the elegances OF existence. Aud
| by the time he has made his Pile he has lost
the capacity for enjoying himself. genera
ton ago the dinner talker was still to be found
Che has since disappeared almost altogether)
and, despite his weakness for taking entirely
too much VINE late in the evening. his loss NAV
well be mourned. One never sees such dinners
IN these times used to be given by a certain
distinguished man who was famous for the
little banquets he gave.
THE FEAsTs WERE STRICTLY STAG
| in make up and seldom more than eight be-
sides the host, sat down at the board. Not
fewer than the graces nor more than the muses.
should the company be, he believed. The
/ host himself stood up and carved and the vege-
tables were placed on the table in silver dishes
Never were there more than eight courses
| First came half dozen rare oysters: then an
lnimltable PURGE; next, noble turkey with
| t-uihes; following this, genuine Kentucky
| mutton shop; then pate, with crust that a
| breath might puff away; ext. three or four
| canvasback ducks, scientifically Gissected, the
blood following the knife; and finally salad
| and the usual dessert, with coffee and so
| forth. Alas! one goes to no such
| dinners III these degenerate days. The
! conversation, too-how delightful it was.
After all, the expert conversationalist
| is nowhere so i'll his glory as at dinner party.
l have heard of dinner takers preparing their
| topics and appropriate wittlcsms beforehand
| but don't believe that any really good con-
| versatlonaist does that sort of thing A dinner