The Durham daily globe., 1890-07-24

In lighter moments, when a renewed
and paid up subscription had kindled the
skies aglow with hope, | had fancied that
/ should indulge in some literary fight
it may be by firing few ''Pistolgraphs'
at "Salmagundi; but that field, knew
was filled, and filled with perfect salts
faction to all concerned.
'Harbor Defences" was another topic
that had conceived might prove of gen.
eral interest, but with the Wilmington
Star columbiad at our principal port,
knew that my services could not be
needed, so long as Duffey lays on, till he
has enough.
"Piety in Print had an alliterative
attractiyencss that for a moment tickled
my fancy, but not wanting to entrench
on the preempted field Of the editor OF
the Concord Times, I refrained nor do
forget that it was respect for another
Concord editor, he of the Standard tripod
that deferred my giving myself full scope
on prospective Matrimony, or The
Maiden 5 UOOS6 COOk-c
When | came to eliminating these
topics from the slate, | found among
others yet left, the patriotic subject, "Our
Governor, Commander Of the Army and
Navy" but | felt that was poaching ON
the exclusive -hrrntfng grounds of the
Washington Gazette.
'White Horses and Redheaded Men
opened up vast field Of speculative lore
and logic, which after a weeks labor was
abandoned when | thought | saw myself
in the Greenville Reflector, being watched,
too, by the hundred-eyed Goldsboro Rob
inson, who in sectional pride warned me
from trespassing in the eastern part of
the state
Believe me or not, as you will, sol
emnly asscverate that the only reason
you are not treated tonight by me with
an eXcecdingl ly funny treatise on 'laugh-
ing gas administered without teeth" is
the report that many windows were bro
ken recently in Boston by mans crack
ing classical and strictly Athenian joke
with scarcely any flavor of fun in it, in
the presence of our worthy president
who now has wire gauZe over all the
windows in his LumbertOn office; which
by the by, the census report shows be-
longs to our hOnored president, and is
mot mortgaged"
Though it purport but little that | do
not discuss here tonight "HoW to make
town with gold leaf tobacco as the
basis" l obtrude the excuse that it is
only because that feat has been success
fully accomplished by my brother Man
ming, Of Henderson; and that, too, be-
tween drinks, as it were, while he was
moving TO Alabama in quest of coal
mine while his own office towel stood
behind the door,
Certainly I was not unconscious that it
would be expected that should descsnt
on ''North Carolina as a field for daily
journalism;' but have been trained that
it is bad manners to speak Of ones mala
dies in company. "Evening journalism
as an adjunct of the morning press"
would have claimed beneficial hour of
discourse; but burnt child breads the
fire, and many of you will readily recall
the recent contiagratiOn in that direction.
Growing philosophical in my rumi
nations, the thought struck me-yery
gently, though, l do protest-that "Pro-
hibiton as Police Measure" offered
fertile field for an orator; and yet from
my experience | had never seen police
measured, successfully, by prohibition.
Indeed | am convinced that it would
cause a strike Of ''the force" all over this
continent, were prohibition made police
measure. Matrimony as a census meas
urc, next loOmed up attractiyely; but
from time immemOrial matrimOny has
never failed to raise a hue and cry that
is not lost even in the weary midnight
hours, long after sleep has come 20
bachelors That subject was abandoned
in the nick of time while | walked the
floor with four yearolder who was max
ing night hidcous because OF a discon-
tented tooth.
1t is betraying no secret Of my entire
when | take you into my
and assure you that | had
finally settled on "Woman" as subject,
and was winding up in a graceful apos
trophe to beautiful and rarely radiant
maiden when Mrs. Haydn glancing at
the page, demanded such explanations as
made me feel culprit.
How to boom town through the
local paper" was a practical idea that |
seized on after had yielded to woman's
rights in my own domestic empire
but that subject | knew was familiar to
all. and to tell the truth, habit that is
save in such consoling
reflection as Virtue is its own reward"
| hankered for something new. My pa
tience was rewarded. l had hit upon a
subject, How to boom the local paper
the town You will readily
admit that in that had hit upon an idea
worth preserving; and yet after turning
hat over in my mind fully week, |
e