The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1890-10-18

The people then played some
games, ate what cake they did not
feed to the children in the pastors
bed, broke leg off II hair-cloth
lounge and propped it up with the
encyclopedia, drove their teams
over the cucumber vines and went
home.
He died last year, just before
time to celebrate his tin wedding.
1 have always believed that a
porterhouse steak would have
saved his life. His congregation
submitted to the inevitable and got
another harder shrub to take his
place. Probably they got an orchid.
The tin wedding occurs at the
tenth anniversary. AT twelve
years silk and linen are the gener-
al characteristics. At fifteen years
comes the crystal, at twenty the
china, at twenty-five years the sill
yer wedding, at thirty pearl, at
forty ruby and at fifty the golden
wedding. The seventy. fifth anni-
versary is called the diamond we'd
ding, but very few succeed in get
ting that far hand in hand.
Your job printer will show what
style of invitation to issue, so you
will have no trouble in regard to
that.
AS regards refreshment you must
use your own taste and conform
somewhat to the customs of the
place in which you live. Some just
pass around the victuals, say about
8 or 10 o'clock, and let her 60 at
that It's good to avoid so far as
possible going into perishable grub.
Get things that will keep, and then
serve after you have run your eye
quickly over the gifts. A friend of
mine got all ready once to feed his
guests on the fat of the land, but
after seeing the layout he sliced
watermelon and went to bed, leav-
ing word in an audible voice for
the butler to turn off the gas as soon
as the guests went home.
1t was crystal wedding and he
told me that eight Of the guests
dubbed together and bought him
glass marble with little turtle in
1t. AT first he thought he would
seek relief in the false joys of rum,
but later on he yielded to better
counsels and bought present for
one of those friends who was about
to have n tin wedding. 1t was "A
thing to use in tearing off checks,
and he made it himself out of an
upholstered oyster can. He also
got the entire list of guests to unite
with him in the expense. This did
much to break up the custom Of
exchanging cookies for carved fur
niture and prune sauce and a glow
ing welcome for a set of silver or
cut glass.
However, may say in conclusion
that marriage, if not carried to eX-
cess is wise provision and a
sacred far as possible, especially as
'egards sex. You will never regret
t. If possible marry above your
station. Both of you should do this.
1t is sure to advance your race. Do
lot mary a foreigner unless highly
ndorsed by those in whom you
rave perfect confidence, or unless
,ou want to very much indeed.
Do not encourage long engage
nents. 1t is better to get weary of
zach other at your leisure after
than todily around and
10 it beforehand. Courtship, how
'ver, is a most delightful industry
nd should not be rashly broken in
Ipon by marriage. Some people
eem to be admirably fitted for
uitors but fail in other occupa-
ions. This is very fortunate in
eed. No suitor can be sure of
situation. The supply
realty exceeds the demand, but
ood husbands and wives are none
90 plendiful.
If the United States Government
established standard of excellence
Or suitable husbands under thirty,
nd able, amiable and sensible
ives under the same age, and
warded II medal to each and {
urse annually instead of oiling [
he thOraX and patting the back of G
apital we would never regret it.
anniversaries containing
opcorn and presents of course are {
'ithin the scope, jurisdiction and |
of those who are inter- {
sted, and may be encouraged or ,
owned upon as best suits those
'ho may or may not be willing to
lace themselves i'm position
here the positive electrOde of pie
nd angel food may be applied in
lch way as to connect with the
ectrode of pincushions and con-
You can suit yourself. "Anxious
Iqufrer," but as you gaze fondly
1 the tin caster which makes your
liver wedding, and dig the jam
1t of your hair on the morning v
ter your anniversary, please do
1t shake your mucilaginOus locks
me and say / did it, for did not. 8
BILL NYE.