The Austin weekly statesman. (Austin, Tex.) 1883-1898, 1890-10-30
LOVES FITFUL FATE.
MATRIMONIAL ADVERTISEMENT
LEADS TO COOLING AND BILLING
BETWEEN TWO SUSCEP-
TIBLES.
A Giddy Chicago Girl of Some Fifty Sum
mers Mashed on an Uns0phisticated
Texan OF Some Twenty-Five
Winters.

Ihere Is danger In matrimonial
advertisement.
Some times, peradventure, there is
Joy IN one, and two hearts are drawn
together and man and wife 90 down
life's highway hand in hand happy
and forever blest.
A matrimonial advertisement, how
ever, as general rule, is dangerous
thing to tritie with, for beneath its
sugar coated surface there is oftimes
the bitter of disappointment, aud
hidden shoals and rocks upon which
hearts are broken and dashed to
pieces.
Some time ago, no matter how long
an unsophisticated Texan living in an
adjoining county, too bashful to do
his own counting and too modest and
heightened to come the arm clutch in
vogue among the fashionable,
answered a matrimonial advertise
ment he saw going the rounds of the
papers.
His letter was promptly answered
and regular correspondence took
place, in which there was much yearn-
ing, flaming passion and lurid infatua-
ton.
1.-TWO souls with but single thought,
Two hearts that beat as one,"
were cast upon the world.
Under the coquettish little stars
playing bo-peep among the constella-
tions, and beneath the gentle rays CT
the silvery moon falling like mantle
of beauty DER the earth the refrain
"Thou at so near, and yet so far"
softly went up to mingle with the
soughing OF the wind, and the whisper
ing of the leaves.
Time wore on and tender missives
bore raptuous love to two devoted
hearts.
The lady and the gentleman became
endeared to each other and arrange
ments we're made to meet in Austin
and be joined in the holy bonds of
matrimony.
A few days ago lady reached the
Driskill and registered from Chicago.
On the same day gentleman
reached Austin and registered at the
Driskill from an adjoining county.
Nothing strange in that, for, per.
haps it is an almost every day occur
renee.
But in this particular case there
was something strange about it.
The gentleman inquired for the Chi
cago lady and the lady inquired for
tn Texas gentleman.
Strange, very. So thought the cour-
teous and obliging Mr.. Rimassa, the
popular clerk at the Driskill.
The two met-the lady from Chi
cago and the gentleman from Texas.
They met in the luxurious parlors
of the Driskill, but what occurred at
that meeting will ever be mystery.
What the governor of North Caro-
lima said to the governor of South
Carolina may be discovered and pub
lished to an anxious world, but what
the lady from Chicago said to the
entleman from Texas and what the
gentleman from Texas said to the
lady from Chicago will never be
known.
On his part it may have been a great,
bewildering, gaping "G-o-s-h,"
while on her part it may have been a
long drawn out "O-h, NY"
No matter, it is not material.
He had expected to meet maiden
like half blown damask rose, fair as
pleasant dream and full of the sweet
fragrance of dawning womanhood.
She had pictured to herself shapely
Apollo, graceful, symmetrical, attrac.
tive, picturesque, brilliant in mind
and elegant in attire.
Alack Alack! both were sorely dis
appointed.
The lady, while neat and of pleas
ing address, had had the brown leaves
of at least fifty autumns to hutter
down upon her head and shoulders.
Her eyes were not peerless stars,
her lips were not red red roses.
He was somewhat Gaunt and sCraggy
and inclined to be cadaverous and the
two disguised with each other unani'
mously determined not TO marry and
the lady left the Driskill and went
back to Chicago and the gentleman
left the Driskill and went back to-
an adjoining county.
So ended the matrimonial adver-
tisement episode.
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