Morning journal and courier., 1890-05-16
ENTERPRISING.

Woman-You're ths first tramp I've seen about here this spring. Tramp-Yes, ma'am; always was noted for my enterprise and push.-Judge.
 Prison Visitor-You seem an honest fellow and feel an interest in you. Gould anything
 be done to make you more comfortable! Conviction betl Visitor-What9 Con- vict-Lemme out!-Puck.
 Miss Pert-How still you have been for the last five minutes, MT. Softleigh. MT. Soft- leigh-Have F We'll, perhaps I have,I have been buried in thought. Miss Pert-Not buried very deep, were you, MT. Softleighf- Somerville Journal.
 Mir. Adams-You don't mean to say that you have to carry all your letters into town from the collegel Miss Poughkeepsie-Yes
 indeed; they are so strict at Vassar that they
 won't even allow mail box on the grounds. -Munsey's Weekly.
 His worship-s'I must really make an ex.
 ample of you-you are hero so often" Pris.
 oner-"Don't be too 'ard on me, guv'nor; you
 ant lad any trouble with me for eighteen
 months. Why, only came out this morn
 ing'!"-Funny Folks.
 Tenant-'sThe windows in your house shut so badly that nay hair blows all about my head You must really have something done to them" Landlord-"I don't see the necessity for that. It would be much sim pier for you to have your hair cut."-Flie- gende Blaetter.
 Editor to associate)-"Why did you &C., cept this spring poem?' Associate-"Well, sir, the blamed poet (for who does not blame him0 walked in here with that poem in one hand and a revolver in the other, and said l must take the posm or something worse. ] told him didn't wish any worse than the poem and took has."-West Shore. "Shtop my paper!" Editor
 "But you ordered it for year" O'Flynn-
 "Oi doan't care if orthered it cintury Shtop my paperi" Editor-"Well, then pay for the six months you've hadp o'Flynn = Pay for the eix months Dive hada Didn't I order it yeara An if shtop 1t now Oi Bedada yez can let the six months that l lave yez kape fur the six months Oi had. Opll trow lem off and meet yez half way. Good marnin' to yez, sorl"--Light Owner of premises (to tenant)-Now, Jones, you may show me those rooms that you think need repairing.
 Tenant (with alacrity)-All right. We'll begin with
 Owner (enthusiaatieally)-One moment! is
 this your baby, Mrs. JonesG What remark ably pretty little fellowl Ootsy, tootsy, knee, baby? Bless it's little bright eyesl I'll be along in minute, Mrs. Jones. Mrs. Jones (to baby)-Go and sit on the gentleman's knee, dearie. (To MT. Jones)- John. don't see that there's anything about l the house that needs fixing up this spring SC very badly.-Chicsgo Tribune. She Sized Him Up.-A citizen who was l passing by a house on Indiana street the other day observed smoke coming through i the roof near the chimney, and he rushed ur | to the door and knocked an alarm. "Wha do you wsnts" asked the woman as she ap- 1 peared. Madam, don't get excited, but
 must tell you-" "oh. I sha'n't get ex
 cited, she interrupted, ''I always keep thi
 handy by." And she lugged out big re.
 volver, which hung on one of the pegs ol
 the hat-rack, and continued: "No clock wanted. No rugs wanted. No books want I ed. No sewing machines wanted. No colo victuals nor old clothes given away. Travell l And he had to retire to a position outside tn ! gate and inform her that the roof was ol fire-Detroit Free PresB.