The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1890-10-07
P00R LEFTY.
She Gave Up Her Money for Marina
duke. and Even Then He
Wasn't Satisfied.

"Debt-debt- nothing but debt"
grumbled Maj. Monthill. as he tore open
one after another the numerous letters
which lay upon his IL o'clock breakfast
table. "IfIwas Midas himself l couldn't
pay EN- all-and / wouldn't either.
There's only n alternative left open to
me that / know of-and that is marrying
an heiress."
The major eyed himself critically in
the opposite mirror. He was a tall, hand
some Apollo Of a military gentleman,
with well preserved teeth, hair and
whiskers, bright hazel eyes, and a gen.
eral air Of stylishness.
eyes" quoth themajor, Unjust marry
rich-and Lefty Price is the woman.
She's as ugly as a Gorgon-what very
unpleasant looking females those Cor
gons must have been, by the way, to get
themselves such a reputation for homli-
ness; but a man must overlook minor de-
fects when his settlement in life is at
stake. I've been a gay young bachelor
long enough; I must really turn my at
tention seriously to Lefty Price. But
there are several preliminaries to be con-
sidered, and n is that she has a lover
for every day in the week, and every
lover / believe q more genuine fortune
hunter than myself. It takes policy to
o%utgeneral so many %suitors, and I've got
to Look sharp if l expect to win the prize. "
Miss Lefty Price was rather after the
Gorgon style of womankind. Maj. Mont
hill was right in his criticism of her style.
She was fat and stout and ~ungraceful,
with a dumpy figure, ashort neck, green
ish gray eyes, reddish brown hair, a
turned up moose and teeth broken and
decayed. Her complexion was muddy
and her chin retreated, and altogether
she was a picture that sorely needed the
glitter Of a golden frame to set it off.
But then Miss Letty's grandfather was
worth 5000, 900, and she was consequently
what the newspapers call a society
favorite." People listened when she
spoke, and laughed obsequiously at her
jokes and admired her taste in dress,
and Miss Lefty, naturally of a confiding
and credulous disposition, believed it all.
With Maj. MonthiH to will was to do,
and no sooner did he make up his mind
that he must marry an heiress, and that
heiress Miss Letitia Price, than he set
vigorously about consummating the af-
fair. Bouquets, drives in the Central
park, books and photographs soft glances
and POLITICALLY favored quotations were
all alike the engines of his warfare;
and when at length the time had arrived
in his estimation to strike The fnal blow,
he dressed himself in the guise of a Nine
tenth century exquisite. and went to
call on Miss Price.
st seems to me" said the heiress, who
had contrived to make her blowsy cheeks
a shade blowsier than ever by a hideous
ruby silk dress, with a scarlet cashmere
scarf Topped over it, that you are unusu-
ally dull this evening, Maj. Monthill."
The major affected to start from a deep
and absorbing reverie.
"Ah, Miss Price, you Of all others
should not fepToaoh me with my lack Of
spirits" he said sentimentally.
"And why not?' demanded Miss Lefty.
with elephantine playfulness.
"Need you ask me when you know so
well that my heart is racked by contend
ing emotions"
''Tm sure" quoth the heiress, looking
down at the point of her Marie Antoi-
nette slippers, II don't know why it
should be racked."
Because / love you, and | dare not
speak my lover
Miss Price colored and essayed a faint
little giggle. 1
"Im sure, major, | don't see any ne
cessity for such timorousness.n
because" impressively went on the
major, looking unutterable things into
the greenish gray orbs-his own eyes
were an exquisite wine brown, and well
he was aware of his advantages in this
respect-''because you are rich and | am
poor, and | have registered a solemn
vow upon the tablets Of my own soul
never to wed an heiressl'
sLar' said Miss Price.
"Of all men," said Maj. Monthill, 81
am the least mercenary. Aroof to shell
ter me from the driving storm, a crust,
a glass of clear cold water from the
spring--that's all | want. Money /
spurn, gold is my bugbear. And yet,
dear ~Letitia-nay, let me call you Illus
for once-fate has decreed that l should
hopelessly lose my heart to one who is
unfortunately rich"
Miss Price burst into tears and i'm
pulslvely put her fat hand into the
majors slender palm.
"Don't talk that way, Marmaduke,"
she sobbed. land don't look at me with
those mournful eyes, O you'll break my
heart"
"Letitia. do you then love me?'
"Yes, yes, l do walled the heiress.
81 love You with all my soul"
"Alas!" groaned the major. ''that two
such hearts as ours should be parted by
a wall of goldr'
But they sha'n't bel' asserted Lefty,
her nose growing red and her eyes
twinkling in the enthusiasm of the mo
ment. No, Marmaduke. moi Not If
grandpapa was ten times as obstinate
and pig headed as he is"
my Letitial" sighed the major, In a
voice honey sweet, and as low as summer
winds breathing DER the twilight sea.
And when he left the Price mansion
he had the satisfaction Of knowing that
he was Miss Letty's accepted lover.
He plunged ruthlessly into more debt