Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1890-05-14
Copyright by Edgar W. Nye,l

WE SCARED UP A BEAR
noon and found that the Indians had
burned up his buildings, massacred his
wife, driven off his mich cows and
killed his children. He looked over the
bloody scene, and then said to himself
with great feeling: This, it seems to
me, is perfectly ridiculous"
drove out with real estate man for
two days at Seattle, not buying, but just
riding and enjoying the scenery while
we allowed prices gently to advance and
our whiskers to grow. Finally | asked
him if he knew of a real "snap," as Her
bert Spencer would call it, within the
reach of poor man He said there was
a bargain out toward Lake Washington,
and if | wanted to see it we would go
out there. | said would like to see it,
for if really desirable, | might buy some
outside property. Wedrove quite awhile
through the prineval forest, and after
batting our team and eating some lunch
which we had with us we resumed our
journey, soaring up bear ON the way
which | was assured, however, was a
tame bear. At last we tied the team,
and, walking over the ridge, we found
lot facing west, 70 feet front, which
could be had then at 1900. | don't
suppose you could get it ut that
now, for it is within a stones throw of
the power house and cable running to
Lake Washington from the city
A friend of mine was telling about
how he lost trade in Spokane Falls
He had the refusal for a week of a "a
foot business lot "at $500" He thought
and worried and prayed over it and
wrote home about it and finally decided
to take it. On the last day of grace he
counted up his money and finding that
he had just the amount, he went over to
the agents Office with it to close the
trade.
Have you the currency with you to
make the trade all CASH" asked the agent
Eyes, sir, L have the whole $500 in
currency" said my friend. drawing him
self up to his full height and putting his
cigar back little farther in his cheek.
Five hundred dollarsi' exclaimed the
agent with a low, gurgling laugh; "the
lot is $500 per front foot. | didn't sup
pose you was Pan-American ass enough
to think you could get business lot in
Spokane for $500. You can't get load
of sand for your children to play in at
that rate"
We have been riding on the cars to-
, day, and ever and anon the blue water
gladdens the eye, the dark pines sough-
ing in the quiet air, and far away in
solemn grandeur, the grandeur of eternal
silence, knowing heap yet giving Moth
ing away, we see old Mount Tacoma.
When we get over to Seattle we will
have to call it Mount Rainier or go away
from there. I've forgotten at what point
on the road You have to change time and
call it Rainier, but l shall try to be safe
and talk about the climate till | find out
about it.
1 met with a medical and surgical
curiosity today on the cars. Itconsisted
of a young man who is compelled to take
his nourishment through rubber tube
which leads directly into the stomach
through the side. had heard of some
thing like it and in my extensive medi-
cal library had read of cases resembling
it, but not entirely like it. The CON
ductor, who had shown me great many
little courtesies already, invited me into
the baggage car, where he had the young
man, in order that might see him.
The subject was German of about 90
years of age, of dark complexion and
phlegmatic temperament He stood
probably about five feet and four inches
high in his stocking feet and did not at
tract me as person Of prominence until
the conductor informed me that he ate
through the side of his vest.
1t seems that about two years ago the
boy had some little gastric disturbance
from eating nocturnal watermelon or
callow cucumber. AS / understand it,
he, in an unguarded moment, called a
physician who aimed to be his own
worst enemy, but who contrived to work
in the public ON the same basis, using no
fayoritism whatever. He was doctor
who has since gone into the gibbering
industry in alcoholic circles. He had
the previous evening been out late, as he
informed his wife, acting as the chair
man of a reception committee, selected
for the purpose of meeting and showing
the proper courtesies to a brand new cit
lien of the United States, but. as mat
ter of fact, he had been appointed by
himself to be the custodian of bright
blue, disorderly jag of great potency
So it happened that TN the day he was
called to the bedside of this plain, juve-
nile colo, the enemy he had taken into
MS mouth the evening before had, as a
matter of fact, rifled his pseudo brains,
and being bitterly disappointed in them
had no doubt failed to return them.
Therefore, Doc as he was affection
ately called by the widowers through
the neighborhood. was entirely unfit to
prescribe. He did so, however, Just the
same. That kind of q doctor is gener-
ally willing to rush in where angels fear
to tread. He cheerfully prescribed for
the boy and, in fact, filled the prescrip-
ton himself. The principal ingredient
OF this compound was carbolic acid. A
man who can, by mistake, administer
carbolic acid and not even smell it must
do his thinking by means of sort of
intellectual wart.
But he did it anyhow.
30, after great suffering. the vouno
slow lost the use of his entire esophaeus