The Opelousas courier., 1890-06-21
HUMOR OF H DAY.
A. mark of respects

A mark of respects
On a racket-The tennis ball.
The last sad writes-Epitaphs.
A well ordered life-A walters.
The "fower" that was ''born to blush
anseen," was probably a wall-flower.
A facetious dime museum proprietor
named his ossiied man ''Bonaparte. p
Washington Star.
Fifteen inmates have Just been ad-
united to the deaf and dumb asylum, and
~rstill" they come.-NDe.
No one rides on a sheep; therefore the
saddles of mutton are not put to their
proper use.-Neao York Meaes.
"Johnny, what teacher are you under
most2" ssThey all sit on me when they
get a chance ."-Munsey' $ Weehly.
aWhat do you find is the first requisite
IN business?" "Pluck," returned the
dealer in live goose feathers. -Rasar.
A book he wrote.
His bosom heaves
When critics quote:
Leaves naught but leaves"
-Harper's Bazaar.
The horse car conductor is like a
p~ugilist, because he punches a great deal
and knocks down occasionally Wash
sngtoa Post.
aDo your boarders loaf around your
parior in the evening9" "No; my
daughter is learningt to play on the piano
-Boston Courier.
He-ssBy the bye, talking of old
times, do you remember that occasion
when / made such an awful ass of my
self?'' She-stWhich2"
An artist has just sold a landscape fol
@24, 900. It seems that an artists views
are getting to be worth as much as those
of a lawyer.--Statesman
They say love adds to young mans signs.
If it be SO, what then!
No single woman, who is wise,
Opposed is to Hymen.
Yankee Blade.
John Doe-eAre you carrying a mort
gage on yoas house2" Richard Doe
RYes; and, strange to say, I'm carrying
Ii because I can't lift il. "-Boston Tran
u snipt.
IA man can now be cremated in Pari
for sixty cents. But the trouble is thai
The man who has sixty cents isn't the
man who wants to be cremated.- lon.
Eegs Statesman.
Little Boy-ttAnd will you really be
be nv wife?n Little Glrl-"Really ane
truly ssThen run home and get my
penknife for me, and hurry up about it
Zoo. Chatter.
aWhat dancing eyes she has!" Eyes
IT'S good the dancing stopped there, too
ff she's had dancing cheeks and q trip
ping nose and d Waiting lip, she'd hav'
been in hard luck. "-Harper's Basar.
She Il o'clock A. NJ, in desperation)-
tI like the Chicago young men best.
He from st. Louis)-"Wh-why9-ma
L ask" She (earnestly-"They hav'
come sgo' to them. Chicago Times.
ooh, would / were a birdF' she sang,
And each disguised one
Thought to himself this wicked Thought;
tsOh, would 4 were q gunW
Chicago Herald.
AbY GeOrge! SAlu 0CnNKlIh A4uNSoA
IL he entered New York harbor, "wha'
i beautiful scenel / could stand here al
day and drink it i'm s'Indeed you are
right said his mate, ''it is most excel
lent port ."-Ha,psr's Basar.
esWhy do we call a handcuff a brace,
let9p asked the commissioner of an Irish
recruit at a recent police examination
ssFaith, bekase it is intended for artist,
replied the applicant, and he got the
position at nce.-Iase5ers' Circular.
Aunt Coupon-sAnd now, George,
how do you like the fine gold watch
sent you on your birthday" George
81 liked it pretty well, auntie. AfteI
me an Billy Smith got tired hearin' i
tick we busted it open and took out de-
works. Bills got der spring tied onto
his dog. It's q bully dog, tooi'-Je1-
dsrs' Rssiew.