Idaho news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1887-1891, 1890-03-22
Some HUMOROUS sporte,

without a permit, wilted when in
formed that it had a poetic license.
Mollie-"I wonder how the express
sion AN arm of the sea- originated"
Harry with tender look)-"Per-
haps somebody noticed that it hug
ged the shore"
While an ounce of wisdom may be
worth pound of wit, it doesn't fol-
low that the toot of the man-who-
knows-it-all carries any weight
Time.
Waiter lat the club -"There is a
lady outside who says that her hus-
band promised TO be home early to-
night. All (rising)-"Excuse me
moment. boston Budget.
"His Gain, Our Loss" was the
motto which they told the florist to
reproduce, but he got it accidentIy
His Loss, Our GAIN" and now the
widow is suing for libel.
A Mr.. Webster wants to change the
name of this republic to the United
States of Columbia. Well, why
dosen't he change it? Who's a-hin-
dering?
Mabel-"Hal, dear, what makes
you always call me youriittle lamb?"
Hal-"Because you always return to
the fold" and he opened his arms
with an expectant and satisfied look
upon his smiling face.
'No use," exclaimed an impecuni-
Gus debtor toan importunate credi-
tor, you can'tget blood out ola tur-
nip" 81 know that. +" responded the
creditor, "but unless / get that
money I'll have gorefrom a beat"
"Your studies are costing me a
great deal" said father to his son
as he reached in his pocket for
money to buy more books with"
Il know it, father" replied the son
with some emotion, as he pocketed
a $10 bill; ''and | don't study very
hard, either"
Chicago Girl-The horrid thingI
Boston Girl-What's the matter?
Chicago Girl-Why, just got let
ter from my brother in India. He
shot an elephant the other day, and
writes that il he can kill another he'll
have a pair of slippers made out of
the hide for me
Stammerer-'I have b-been t-told,
d-d-doctor, that you h-have sure
c-cure flor s-stuttering." DR.. Hum
bugh-"Yes; for an advance fee of
$40 will let you into the secret of
it, "W-well, here's the t-tenner
Now, how c-can / s-stop m-m-my
stut-tut-er-ing?' Don't talk. Good
day, sirl''
'Do you feel any changer" said the
minister, solemnly, rs he walked back
during the revival meeting and plac-
ed his hand gently on the sailors
shoulder. The sailor, thinking he
was expected to contribute some
thing, quickly ran his hands deep
down into his pockets, then looking
up into the minister's face with n
blank smile answered, Not a derned
cent, parson."
A school teacher who lost all pa
thence with very stupid boy finally
said to the boys father: "Your son
is getting worse and worse every
day." Il don't think he can be quite
that bad, demonstrated the partial
parent. "Well, then, he is at least
getting worse and worse every other
day, or say three times week, said
the teacher.
visitor-And so you are studying
astronomy at school. Do you like
it? Little Girl-Oh, its awfully in
teresting. The weather on the moon
isiust like it is here. Visitor tincredu-
louslyl-Does your astronomy say
that? Little Girl-Why. yes. It
saysif there were people ON the moon
they'd roast one day and freeze the
next.-New York Weekly.
Johnny came home from school the
other day very mucheXcited. What
do you think, pa? Joe Steward, one
OF the big boys had an argument
with the teacher about a question
in GRAMMAR" "What position did
Joe take?" "His last position was
across a chair, with his face down
ward!'
Bishop Gullem-"I believe it is a
Wisconsin clergyman who has finally
succeeded in converting water into
fuel" Miss Penelope Peachblow-
That's very well for this world, but
for the next it might add to ourcom-
fort il the clergy could devise some
means of converting fuel into water.
Lie.
John-I'm sorry | shall be awayso
long, Miss Janet. You don't know
how l hate to say "good-by' TO
to Won. hut | supnose the best OF