Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1890-02-06
THE TARIFF.
Hon. VIM Snort Shows the Farmers how
Their .onderful Prosperity is due
4, the Tariff ON Corn.

No sooner was the announcement
made that the Hon. Windy Snort,
Representative in Congress from the
yellow corn district, would spend the
holidays with his constituents, than
arrangements were under way for an
immense mass meeting of farmers at
Cottonwood school house, to be ad-
dressed by the great orator, the foe OF
monopolies- the terror of trusts, and
ever perspiring champion OF the horny
handed sons of toll, whose bass drum
voice has been heard throught the land.
When the time for the meeting had
arrived, less than 10000 tillers Of the
soil packed the school house to suffo-
cation. A chairman and secretary
were promptly chosen, and the speaker
at once introduced, who, after waiting
three-quarters of an hour for the
deafening applauses to subside, said:
My tell0sr citizens: This magnifi-
cent, overwhelming and paralyzing
ovation is only equalled by that
spontaneous and irrepressible welcome,
always extended to me as your dis
tinguished representative, every time 1
enter the halls of Congress. Tire
mendous applause and cries of Bully
for Congress.'') My countrymen, the
great prosperity of to-day is due to the
marvellous influence of our high pro-
tective tariff. (Amid the applause
which followed this declaration, an old
fellow opened the stove door, and
shoveled il, two bushels Of corn in the
ear, at tn sight of which the orators
face fairly olazed with look of triumph
as he said. Little did expect my old
friend, Farmer Plethoric, with a scoop
shovel in Land. would SO Opportunely
furnish al ocular demonstration of the
truth of n !, assertion, that the tariff IS
the great source of the farmers
wonderful prosperity. (Applause.)
"Under the magical influence of the
protective tariff, the yield per acre of
corn has IL creased to an alarming ex-
tent; not charming to the farmers, but
alarming the coal barons of the land.
(Applause and cries of ''down with
the coal oarons.'0 1t requires no
prophet, my fellow citizens, to see that
under the encouraging influence of the
tariff, corn is rapidly coming to the
front as the popular fuel of the day.
(Cyclonic applause.) And why should
it not, my countrymen? First 1t is
cheaper th;. n coal; second, it is free
from sulph T; fourth it is cleaner than
coal; fifth, it lightens the labor of your
servants.
What more pleasant and sublime
scene can we contemplate, than to
witness the farmer in his richly fur
nished, fou story brick mansion, with
twenty-five rooms, mansard roof
and seven gables, listening to his
queenly daughter as she plays the ac-
Compartment on her thousand dollar
Steinway grand piano, and sings that
beautiful farm ballad, 1.-The flowers
that bloom in the spring, tra-la," while
he, with his wife and little ones, toast
their toes before a fire, from fuel which
nature has furnished him on the COB,
as the product of his own toll. Jim
mense applause.) But gentlemen, this
is not all. nor even half.
BOSS OF THE CATTLE MARKET.
Under the wonderful influence of
the pl plotective tariff, you are not only
holy terror to the coal .nOnopOlies,
but the farmer is boss of the cattle
market. Years ago you had to butcher
your own beef and drive your fat
cattle ON foot to market. To-day, by
the aid of the tariff. you find yourselves
50 thoroughly masters Of the situation
that Mr. z. D. Armour is forced to
convey your cattle in palace cars.
furnished for the express accommo-
dation of farmers-tO central point.
where your animals are gorgeously
entertained in stock yards erected
for your benefit, until such times as
they are kindly led out one by one and
gently chloroformed, and in due time
lald down at your own doors In tne
shape of beautifully dressed beef
Applause and cheers for Armour.)
1T is true you generously allow
small stipend for these Accommodations
but under the blessings of the tariff
you find yourselves abundantly able
to do so, bes ,des, MIR. Armour being
your servant, you, as Christian men
recognize the justice of the principle
that The laborer is worthy of his hire.
(cries of amen.) And gentlemen. an
gratified to be able to tell you, that
under the muniticent provisions of the
! interstate commerce law, this lovely
arrangement, SO advantageous to the
farmers has been held to be perfectly
legal, and Mr.. Armour can't get out oil
it. tApplause, and three cheers for the
courts.)
but more. my conntrymen, (Crie:
of Yes, give us more.) There is not :
dud on your backs, board in your pi:
pen, chicken house, corn crib or COW
| cb al t,,at ia NOT fully r,rotncfo1 Won,