Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1890-03-01
HONEST CARL DUNDER.
Things the Old Gentleman Caught On To-
While in Retirement.

While in Retirement.
'sWelll welll' exclaimed Sergeant
Kendall in great surprise, as Carl Dun
der softly entered the Woodbridge
street station Saturday afternoon Il
thought you had started for Germany
sure"
Not oxactly,' replied Mr.. Dunder,
as he blew his nose with great compla-
cency.
But where have you been?"
Sergeant, vhas some greenhorns?
''You don't look to be-
IF some COW meets me on der street
would she take me for hay?'
Hardly"
'If you vhas some confidence MAJ
would you try to play game on me?'
Il don't think so. But what do you
mean by all this?'
Sergeant, used to be like some cab
bage-head. Eaferypody beats me.
Eaferypody laughs at me, und like
to go back to Shermany. Dis vhas all
shanged now"
''How?"
.'Vheu, keeps quiet for der last six
weeks und get posted If somepody can
make fun of me now ike to see him
do it. | vhas right onto an der tricks
YOU eater heard of, und l can spot Z
sharper two blocks away. You won't
hat to tell me any more to shump into
dot river"
I'm reioiced at the news. Now tell
me who posted you"
"A Teller from New York. He takes
me in class all alone for fifteen dollars
per week How vhas dot, eh?'
And he threw up his right arm and
made a long jump sideways, knocking a
chair over and soaring a boy out of 8
years growth.
That's pretty good. What kind of a
movement do You call it?'
dot vhas nickeI-plate movement,
to be practiced if man shumps oudt OF
der alley to hit you with sand-club.
When dot club comes down you vhas
ten feet away. Dot probably saves my
life one tousand times"
What else?"
''VhelI, if tief comes aroundt can
spot him like grease rolling off log"
How
"He carries his left hand in hi,
pocket. und can't look you in der face.
can pick em oudt on der street by del
Dozen
That's good thing. and you ought
to start detective bureau. Anything
else?"
Il should shmile! If you vhas some
pickpocllet, where you look for my
money, eh?"
In your breast-pocket."
so? Ha. ha. ha, Dot vhas another
trick, put my handkerchief oOp here
und my wallet in my coat-tail pocket
und if some tief goes to rob me he gets
nottings. Dot probably safes me two
million dollars"
Yes. Any thing more?"
''Vhell. suppose ] vhas in Chicago und
A bunkO man likes to make me his vic
tim. If it vhas you, vhas would you
Io?"
81 don't know
''Ha, ha! ha! 1t pays me to learn dot.
Il safes me tousands of dollars. | shust
wink at him-so. und say: How vhas
ICONS to-day?' und off he goes. Dot
makes him understand | vhas on to der
Jacket"
II see. What else?'
Suppose you vhas going home at
night. und a robber steps oudt und wants
our money or your life? How would |
you do?''
Give him my money, of course"
'.You would eh? Ha. ha! ha! Dol
Aows who vhas grcenhorns! i should've |
10 dot vhay. | should open my umbrella |
md hold it before me und cry fire.! a,
a;rd as could No robber can get al
,ca if YOU hold an umbrella Oudt !
!. now lois of odder things, but | hat no
more time to-day. / come down to gil
YOU some complaints. SOmepody stole
twenty-five dollars from me last night.
und dot Teller from New York vhas lost
He goes oudt to walk around leedle by
himself, und being a stranger he vhas
all mixed oop und can't find his way
back"
"Ah. Didn't you lose coat, too?'
YES. 1t vhas behind der door, und
takes coat und money, too"
Come this way
He led him into the lookup, halted
him at one of the cells, and asked him
if he knew the occupant.
Why, he vhas my trainer!" exclaimed
Mr. Dunder. ''How he comes in here.
Was he some lost shild?"
'-fie got yoar coat and money. We
have the coat and most Of the cash.
How do you tell thief. Mr.. Dunder?''
But Mr. Dunder didn't reply. His
hair stood ZIP, his eyes bulged out, and
he walked out of the station like a man
going somewhere in nightmare. -
Detroit Free Press.