New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1890-03-19
THE Talk OF THE DAY,


General william sooy Smiths son has had his name
changed to sooysmth by legislative enactment. This
will prevent him from taking part in the famous
nual reunion of the smith family at Peapsck, n. j.,
for all who take part in that reunion just plain
smiths. And that recalls amusing change Of name
that occurred few years ago in a Western town
gentleman named Smith came to the town to settle
and was interviewed by a local reporter who began
by asking his NAME John Smith," replied the
gent eman. didn't catch the last name" said tho
reporter, who little hard of hearing. Plain
smith, was the reply; and the next day the paper
had a bright interview with Mr. John Plansmlth, who
is about to locate in midst At first Smith
ANNOYED at the bundcr, but on second thoughts hs
concluded to accept the situation and the name, and
he is now engaged in founding family Of Painsmths
|" 4 Different vcgctablc.-Tom-Loo here, Dick
enough Joking about this. Pm in earnest now, ana
demand. sir, that you pay me tlat zen you porrowea
Dck-SO you're getting on your dignity, are your
Well. 20 ahead. You can't get blood oGt Oh turhp
rom-l'm not trying to- am trying to get money
out of a beat.-(Munscys Weekly.
one Of those Democratic statesmen who spend
several hours day in the grocshops was profanely
eloquent yesterday in denouncing the arrest on st.
Parick's Day. Of Old and tried Democrats IL was
pretty rough, that's fact but there arc still more
dreadful possibilities in the future. They may become
tried and convicted Democrats.
Eastern Wcakllngs-Mlss Gotham-Why do those
Wcscmcrs call Eastern people tenderfeetl .
Returned Touris-Iiecaise Eastern people ca AZ
suburban lot without feeling red-lNcwYork Weekly
some one wants TO start fund for the erection Of
statue of Dickens in this city. All right; but what's
the matter with having statues Of Of own
novcsts frstl Besides, there are the Grant Monu-
mcnt and the Memorial Arch yet to be built. Please
don't crowd u.s.
Important Law Pont-Law studcnt-I notice that
in selecting jury you always question them about
| igD n.
Mr. Iardnutt Careat criminal lawyer),I Is always
| Law stldent-Are you afraid they won't have no
Mr. iI.~l'm-no afraid they'll have 100 much
(New- York Weekly.
They manage TO have considerable fun one way o.
another in the Tennessee Legislature. a Tennessee
paper reporting the passage Of important BILL sayst
There was great enthusiasm. some disorder and some-
body tied sleeps bell 10 Mr.. Collins, Of Carter
| County, and he did not know where 1t was until ne
had attracted the attention Of the House. Visitors
then filed ont and the House resumed its usual ap'
pearance."
An Exploded Noton.-Mrs. Gotham-This paper
say, mud baths will cure rheumatism:
Mr. Gotham &, great sufferer)-Nonsense! Ivo
fallen down I'm Broadway half dozen times, and 10
didn't do a bit of sood.-(New York Weekly
some one who has kept count says that Senator
Blair, speech on hi, Educational bill contains c73oOo
words. And yet there people who assert that
senator's don't earn their salaries.
Have You heard it-that laugh-has it come 10 YOU
Has il crossed your long way through this valley Of
tears
H. 1t inged your teeth out and looscned your hair
and made You think brick Gg't Wa nick in the ara
| with il, Haw. Iiaw-IIaw Iaw.
Has your tvmpanum tremblei in delicate rain
A. ID caught the effects Of the mrthtul refrain.
liza, the matter of gray that, colcd mp in head
| Curr,lcd up all confused till the mass seemed Ike
/
Washington Post.
There is an old ncgress in Dallas, Texas. who IS
Although she very feeble. her memory is good, and
she give, clear and consistent history Of her life She
! is a great smoker.
An electrician has invented wonderful watch that
| will tell a when hi, note il coming due. HIS
watch would Dee great al more remarkable rs vel
- useful. II u would tell the man where 10 get the
money To- pay the not - NOrri,toWn Herald.
The people who invent hcfadic crcsts and mottos
are finding plenty to do nowadays. The other day a
man. who recently made stake" in r Western nine.
called 40 one of their establishments and said The
erl- want some of a motter. or crest. a they
| call IT, to put their letter paper. think it All
doeconcd fooli,hue-~ but : long they want IT, they
must have it. 20 ! want you Ia fix up one o yer
most expensive cre,iS. like what them English docks
and counts have. and send the bill To me. Whas
motter We'll don't care much. 4 aint pretty.
hu | get there all the same would suit all right.
Just throw 1t into Latin or Greek and Irvine 1t around
the crest