davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
Three Little Words.

With the three little words, why"
chow" what" it is quite possible for
some blockhead to puzzle philosopher.
"Why does the magnetic needle point al
ways to the north?" "How was the uni
verse made?" What is light" Here are
three questions that any fool may ask, yet
that all the wisdom in the world cannot
answer. There are hundreds of other
queries as simple and as likely to suggest
themselves to the inquisitive to which sci
ence can make no satisfactory reply. On
the other hand, positive philosophy. his
tory, the mechanic arts and other practical
branches of human knowledge afford con-
elusive responses to a vast number of i'm
portant "whys" and "hows" and whats. "
All that it is necessary for man to know
he can learn from these sources, and educa-
ton in it's best sense consists in the broad
cast diffusion of the information they
afford, in its simplest, clearest form.
Europeans say that we are an over curious
peOple-that we examine and cross-examine
strangers about matters with which we
have no concern. That's mistake. Every
thing in the way of information that any
human being is willing to impart concerns
us. We want to know. If those we ques-
ton do not choose to answer, or cannot
answer, our why's" and elbows" and
"whGtsy" they can say so. We shall not be
offended by the rebuff; but ask, we will
New York Ledger.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
go West, Young Man."

"Do you know" said an old timer at the
Chicago club, that that epigrammatic bit
of advice to young men, GO west so gen.
orally attributed to Horace Greeley, was
not original with him? No? Well, it
wasn't. 1t all came about this way: John
l.. B. Soule was the editor of The Terre
Haute Express back in the sos, and one
day in 81, if l remember right, he and
Dick Thompson, afterward secretary of
war, were conversing in the formers sane
tum. Thompson had just finished advis-
ing Soule to go west and grow up with the
country, and was praising his talents as a
writer.
why, john he said, you could write
an article that would be attributed to Hor-
ace Greeley if you tried
"'No, couldn't responded Mr.. Soule
modestly. I'll bet couldn't
"Tll bet barrel of -four you can if
you'll promise to try your best, the flour
to go to some deserving poor person
"'All right. I'll try responded Soule.
"He did try, writing a column editorial
on the subject of discussion-the oppor-
tunities offered to young men by the west.
He started in by saying Horace Greeley
could never have given a young man bet
ter advice than that contained in the
words, Go west, young man.
"Of course the advice wasn't quoted
from Greeley, merely compared to what
he might have said, but in a few weeks
the exchanges began coming into The En-
press Office with the epigram reprinted and
accredited to Greeley almost universally.
So wide circulation did it obtain that at
last The New York Tribune came out ed.
itorially, reprinted The Express article,
and said in a foot note:
1.-THE expression of this sentiment has
been attributed to the editor of The Trib-
une enormously. But so heartily does he
concur in the advice it gives that he in
dorses most heartily the epigrammatic adj
vice of The Terre Haute Express, and joins
in saying 60 west, young man, go west. VI"
Chicago Mail.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
France Burles All Its Cltizens.

1t is the law in France for the govern
ment to bury all of its citizens In that
country funerals are a government monop-
oily, and the undertakes are military of
ficers, ranking usually as majors or cap
tains. The finer the funeral the higher
the rank of the official in charge, who is
dressed, as a rule, in black velvet, with
much gold lace, sword and a cOckade.
The burial bureau in Paris occupies one of
the largest buildings in the world. If you
die there your relatives and friends are not
consulted at all as to your funeral. The
bureau upon receiving report of your death
through the police takes its own steps to
find out the social position and means of
your family.
In accordance with its information on
these points the funeral is ordered. If the
bureau decides that you ought to have a
first class funeral you are compelled to
have it whether or no, and if it is not paid
for promptly the family goods will be con-
6scated The sort of funeral chosen for
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
Carelessness Criticised.

He came out of the house, boarded the
car and looked about with the good hui
mOred air of man who has just finished
"A satisfactory breakfast. His eyes rested
on the feet of a man opposite, and he con-
tinued to look at them with half amused
expression as he "hewed his toothpick
Finally the other passenger left the car,
and he of the toothpick turned to his
neighbOr:
Did you notice the great blotch of dried
mud on that gentleman's shoe?" he asked.
IT'S funny" he continued, "how a well
dressed man will be so careless sometimes.
Had a fresh shine, walked out of the
house, didn't look to see where he was go
ing, and stepped right square into mud
puddle the first thing. dunno, l think
that kind of gives a man away, don't
YOU"
Excuse me-" said the other, but you've
got something on the under side of your
coat sleeve. don't know what it is"
The toothpick chewer raised his arm to
get Il view of the spot indicated, then care
fully wiped off the sleeve with his hand
kerchief, remarking as he did so, cts
stewed Goldfish and cream, that's what it
is."-Detroit Free Press.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
Disposal of Sewage.

For many years the only important OBJ
ject in regard to sewage seemed to be how
to get it out of the way, and thai, indeed,
with some variation, is still the burden OF
the inquiries on the subject in all populous
places where the retention of offensive re-
fuse is recognized as an evil, and where
many other things are postponed to the
great cause of public health. In some
communities the solution OF this problem,
even in v""-' "H"ieIt times, was subStan-
TALLY wn~C ~ is now u the best s...~.
cities; that is, sewage was carried TO uas-
tant points by current of water flowing
through close pipes. Even in the city Of
Jerusalem this system was in operation in
the days of solomon, and modern engin-
GERS have discovered the remains of the
system, and thus proved an interesting
fact as to which history was silent save for
few vague phrases here and there.-Har-
per's Weekly.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
Some Foreign Words.

One of the fair young girl graduates who
quite recently mapped out the destiny oil
the world in an essay entitled "a Dream
of the Future" has taken to writing so
ciety novels, and her latest effort, the
manuscript of which lies on the desk OF
the literary editor for review, is well up to
the standard of current fiction. Especially
is this so in the selection of foreign words
and phrases which abound in the story. II
strikes me, however, that they are not al
ways up 10 the mark in the application.
For instance, ii is going a little too far,
think, to say TIT the rounded cheeks of
Jessica wore beautiful sub rosa hue, and
that her hat draped in nom de plumes was
most becoming. | don't quite see how the
little bona lide could come in wagging his
tail, or that the chickens could be put into
their coup d. etat. l should not care to
risk my bones galloping away on hors de
combat, but suppose | should be as safe
as in ordering my steak double entendre,
especially when Ich diem at 2 o'clock pre-
cisely. Finis, the end is an apt quotation.
Memphis Times.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
The House Fly.

A house fly is born fully grown and of
mature size, and there are no little flies of
the same species, the small ones OCCASION
ally observed being different in kind from
the large ones. The house fly does not bite
nor pierce the skin, but gathers its food by
a comb or rake, or brush like tongue, with
which it is able to scrape the varnish from
covers of books, and it thus tickles the skin
of persons upon which it alights to feed
upon the perspiration. A fly is a scaven-
ger, and is vehicle by which contagious
diseases are spread. 1t poisOns wounds,
and may carry deadly virus from decaying
organic matter into food.-New York Tele-
gram.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22

One of our city undertakers relates lit
tie incident which illustrates the power of
prayer in a way different from that which
is taught ~ orthodox ministers. lie says:
II had 4 funeral the other day. 1t was
the child of poor family; but few people
and no minister were at the grave. |
pitied them; it looked 50 desolate and for
lorn that made prayer at the last my
self, although had never done the like
anywhere before"
You didn't" exclaimed his wife.
Eyes, did. have heard it done so often
that it all came to me without thought.
Besides that it did me good; got three
funerals last week which would never
have come to me had it not been for the
prayer" -Pittsburg Chronicle-Telegraph
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
A Witty Cabman,

Among the cabmen at the city hall plaza
is one who has reputation for wit among
his fellow cabbies. His name, think, is
Cornell. He had as customer the other
night certain literary gentleman who is
distinguished by the elegance of his raj
ment as well as the costliness of the UNI
brellas he carries. OF this literary swell
one of his inUimates says che spends three
fourths of his time in selecting clothes
and the other fourth in buying umbrellas. ="
One wet night he sported particularly
loud umbrella, aud probably fearing that
the heavy shower might injure 1t he hired
a cab to take him home. Arriving there
the cabman demanded 81 from him.
What do you mean by overcharging
me-" said the literary swell as he hoisted
the umbrella. do you know who l am?"
Il don't care if you were the umbrella,
I'll have my fare" said the coachman, and
he got it.-Brooklyn Eagle
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22

There is an old belief that salt water in
jures the hair, and a delightful old lady
once explained the reason therefor
You see," she said, ''the salt in the
water is stronger than the hair in YOU
head, and so the salt just draws the hail
right out" Assuming this to be true
that salt water will draw the hair out OF
the head when it isn't otherwise specially
inclined toward coming out, by good
homeopathic reasoning we come to the
conclusion that when the hair insists upon
coming out of its own accord vigorous
treating with salt and water will put a
stop to it. NTlcther the reasoning be true
or not the fact is Not all the tOnics you
can buy at the hairdresser's will do your
hair half the good, if it manifests a
tendency toward falling out, that a daily
scalp bath of strong salt and water will
New York Evening Sun.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22

There was new dog at the farm house,
writes n correspondent of Wide Awake,
and Baby, aged 4, had been told that he
must not play with it. On his way to the
farm he was reminded of his mammals in
junction not to play with the strange dog,
and he exclaimed in a tone which showed
him proudly conscious of his virtue:
of course | wouldn't for the world do
what mamma tells me not to!' Then, de-
scending suddenly from this unusual
height of morality, he added conttdentially,
And, sides, he snapped at one of the men
yesterdayr'
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
LOVE ONE ANOTHER.

1t was Saturday night. and two children small
Sat on the stairs in lighted hall,
Vexed and troubled and sore perplexed,
To learn for Sunday the forgotten text;
Only three words on gilded card,
But both children declared it hard.
"Love, that is easy-it means, why, this
CA warm embrace and a loving kiss);
"But 'one another, don't see who
Is meant by 'anOther'-now, May, do your"
Very grandly she raises her head,
Our thoughtful daring and slowly said,
AS she fondly smiled on the little brother,
why, am only one. and you are another,
And this is the meaning-don't you see?-
That must love you, and you must love me. v
Wise little preacher, could any sage
Interpret better the sacred page?
Good Cheer.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
Pineapple Fabric.

Still another textile material bids fair to
rival jute. This time it is the pineapple
fiber, and a Mr.. r. Blechynden, of Cal
Cutta, is attempting to awaken interest to
the great economic value of this product
The pineapple has long been cultivated for
its fiber in India, while it is manufactured
into cloth in the Philippines and woven
into linen in China But more recent in
vestigations show that when subjected to
the process of bleaching the fiber becomes
plant enough to be spun like fax and by
the same machinery. The fiber can be sub
divided into threads of such delicacy as to
be barely perceptible and yet sufficiently
strong for any purpose-New York Tele
gram
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
For Office Seekers.

The following story. which may be true,
but more probably is not, is related Of
President Lincoln: A local politician went
to Washington seeking an Office, but in a
fortnight came back without it. "What
was the trouble?" asked one of his friends.
Didn't you see the president" eyes, of
course" answered the politician. "Well,
then, why didn't you get the Officer"
"Well," said the disappointed applicant,
1--WE went in and stated our errand. The
president heard US patiently, and then
said, Gentlemen, am sorry that l have
no Office for Mr.. -, but if | can't give
you that can tell you story Then he
went on:
"'Once there was a certain king who
kept an astrolOger to forewarn him of
coming events, and especially to tell him
whether it was going to rain when he wish
ed to go on hunting expeditions. One day
he had started for the forest with his train
of lords and ladies when he met a farmer.
"'Good morning, farmer, said the
king
"'Good morning king, said the farmer.
Where are you folks going|
Hunting said the king.
Hunting. You'll all get Wet said
the farmer
1.-THE king trusted his astrologer and
kept on. but at midday there came up a
tremendous rain that drenched the king
and all his party. !,
CON getting back TO the palace the king
had the astrologer decapitated, and sent
for the farmer to take his place.
Laws sakes, said the farmer when
he arrived, ''it amt me that knows when
it's going to rain, it's my donkey. When
it's going to be fair weather he always car
ries his ears forward, so. When it's going
to rain he puts 'em backward, So
Make the donkey the court astrol-
oger!' shouted the king.
=" 1T was done, but the king always de
clared that that appointment was the
greatest mistake he ever made in his life.
"Mr. Lincoln stopped there" said the
Office seeker why did he call it a mis-.
take? we asked him. Didn't the donkey
do his duty"
YES said the president, but after
that every donkey in the country wanted
an office '"-Youth's Companion.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22

A monument to the lifebOat now stands
at South Shields, said to be the lifeboat's
birthplace In 1883 the ship Adventure
was wrecked off the Tyne and a committee
was formed to consider the matter of pro-
viding a liieboat The models submitted
by Henry Greathead, boat builder, and
by William WOuldhave, a journeyman
painter, were selected by the committee
for use. Whether Wouldhave or Great
head was the actual inventor is a moot
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22

We find in a Theological exchange the
following sound advice to persons learning
the art of engraving: There is no greater
hindrance to progress in learning to en-
grave than in trying to cut with badly
set or a half sharp graver. Such prac-
tice speedily engenders some of the worst
evils, 'constraint' and restraint in the
use of a graver, by which is meant the
wrist becomes stiffened, the easy motion
of the hand impaired and the ability to
hold a graver lightly materially crippled,
and thus the power to cut strokes clean,
true and free is measurably destroyed"
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22

Eccentric bachelors, if you want to be
cured of your oddities and become polished
Christians, marry! You, sir, with the
slOuching gait, the pocketed hands, the i'll
tailored frame just pair off with neat,
smart little damsel who has an eye for the
picturesque, and before the honeymoon is
over she will so transfgure you that you
will scarcely know yourself in the looking
glass.
Beauty and the Beast" is no fable.
Many n monster" has been transformed
into a gentleman by the necromantic in
fluence of pretty woman. You, Sir MINI
rod, whose talk is of double barrels and
settlers, of deer shooting on the Adiron-
dacks or moose hunting in the Canada
wilds, do you wish to be civilized and So
ciali2ed? Doubtless you do. Then marry
q true gentlewoman, and she will soon
make you as gentle and gallant cavalier
as ever shawlcd lady at ball or opera.
Even the miser may be won from his gold
en- Pc gol l., Z. .,cau.0GS vic, though it
must be confessed Chat of all eccentricities
the greed of riches is the most difficult to
eradicate.
The fact is that every eccentric bachelor
is like a helmless ship that has waved
more or less out of her proper course. A
good wifc's advice is the tjller that he
needs to b-ing his head round and steer
him safely and happily over the sea of
Iife.-New York Ledger.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22

An effective means of preventing the
furnishing of silverware by exposure to
the air or from sulphur fumes liberated by
heat is by painting it with a little soft
brush dipped in alcohol in which some col
lodion has been dissolved, says The Deco
rator and Furnisher. The liquid dries inn
mediately, and forms thin, transparent
and absolutely invisible protection. 1t can
be removed at any time by dipping the
article in hot water.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
Lsaves for Textile Purposes.

For cordage and other textile purposes
numberless leaves are used, and they serve
very generally for packing and wrapping
up small parcels in India. In Guiana
Tibisiri fiber is obtained from the inner
surface of the spiral leaves of the TIA palm,
Mauritia heXuosa. 1t is used by the In
dians for making hammocks, etc. The
leaves are cut before they ere open, and
the midrib separated by drawing each di-
vision of the leaf through the finger and
thumb. After drying the fiber is ready
for use without further preparation.
About a quarter of pound may be pro
cured from each leaf, and if the central
leaf is left uninjured no evil effect is pro-
duced from the tree. Bags and mating
could be easily and cheaply made from this
fiber, as well as hats similar to those
known as Panama.-New York Telegram.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22

A single pair of herrings, if allowed to
reproduce undisturbed and multiply for
twenty years, would, at the end of that
time, not only supply the whole world with
food but would have become inconvenient-
ly;numerOus.- Chatter
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
Josh Billings.

Josh Billings is the nom de plume of
Henry W. Shaw, who was born in Lanes
borough, Mass, in the year 1878 He first
became known as humorous writer and
lecturer in 1868, and since that time his
comic sketches have been extensively pub
lishcd in the journals of the United States
and England.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22

point; out locally wOuIunave is IUuhru
upon as the author of the model. The
names of both men are given on the memo
rial The first occasion on which a ship
wrecked crew was landed by means of a
liieboat was on June 80, 179O.-Chicago
Herald
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22

why, where have you beeu so long?"
;he asked, rs he joined the parry on the ho-
tel piazza.
"Oh, simply INDUCING in quiet refec-
tiOns"
ooh, you vain man. Looking at your
self in the mirror, l suppose. New York
Herald
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22

Senator Davis, of Minnesota, was for
merly an expert telegraph operator and
was for long time employed in the Office
at Waukesha. Senator Davis was one of
the first four men in the country to read
telegraphy by sound
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22

Longfellow's favorite gem was the royal
amethyst; that deep, flashing purple that
changes to ruby by an artificial light. This
love was shared by the artist Hunt, and the
two were always looking for new speci-
mems OF Ibis stone
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22

you Will be one or eIeven classes, as the Du-
teau may direct, the expense descending
from $1,000 for a first class burial to SD
for tenth class interment. Paupers come
in the eleventh class and are put under
ground for nothing. Cor. Washington
Star
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
The Race Question Again.

Uncle Abe, they tell me your colored
church is very exclusive?"
at tries to be, sab, but err Thite man
will sneak in ercasionally."-Eranh.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22

Lucy tef1'usivolv)->Iv dear, WIS 50 very
sorry that was not in when you called
yesterday.
Jessie Earnestly Please do not feel
vexed, dear; | assure you it didn't matter
at all.-Pittsburg Bulletin.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
His Excuse.

Jessie-You careless fellow Can't you
dance without falling?
Jack (whose hated rival is Britisher)-
Pardon me, but l merely stumbled over
the his dropped by your Cockney admirer.
~Pittsburg Bulletin.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
A Young Man of business.

Teacher-Willie, can you name the five
senses?
Tommy from back seat)-I-I can tell
Teacher-Well, Tommy, what are they9
Tommy-A half dime.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
RAILROAD TIME TABLE.
I. D. G. NJ. RAILROAD.

u d .. ~. haILHSRp'
DEPARTURES.
For st. Louis via Iron Noun
tain or NJ, X. & t.. ..... ..5:45 a. m
For st. Louis, via Iron Noun
tain -0ute. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS. 500 p. m
For Laredo. lilo a. m.
ARRIVALS.
From st. Louis, Iron Mountain
and NJ, K. 81 T.............10;55 a. m
From st. Louis, Iron Mountain
and M, X. & L. routes. 1000 p. m.
From Laredo. Observation-Disclosures. 1895 p. m.
SOUTHERN PACIFIC RAILROAD.
THROUGH EXPRESS EAST.
Leave for New Orleans, Houston
and Galveston. . 900 p. m.and 9:25 a. m.
ARRIVE FROM THE EAST.
Arrive from New Orleans, Hous-
ton and Galveston 6:40a. m. and 4:10 p. m.
THROUGH WEST.
Leave for San Francisco, Ell
Paso and Eagle Pass. .......: 4:4O1p. m.
Arrive from San Francisco Ell
Paso and Eagle Pass. ........ 9:25 a. m
THE s. A. & A. p. r. REMISSION
ROUTE.
DEPARTURES.
Leaves for KerrvIIle, daily, ex-
cept Sunday, at............ 500 p. m
Leaves for Galveston, Houston
and Cuero, daily, except
at. ........... ...... S:45 a. m
Leaves for CorpusChrsti,R Rock
port and Beeville daily, ex-
cept Sunday, at.............. las p. m
ARRIVALS.
From Kerrville, daily, except
Sunday, at. northumberland. $50 a. m
From Corpus Christi, RockpOrt
and Beeville, daily, except
Sunday, at. .............. Las p. m,
From Galveston, Houston and
Cuero, daily.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS. Gas p. m.
MALLORY STEAMSHIP LINE.
Steamers sail and arrive at Galveston
every Wednesday and Saturday morning.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1890-08-22
The Sad Part.

Fred-l wish my girl would hurry up
and marry me, if she is going to-
Edwin-Is she keeping you in suspense?
FreG-No, eXpense.-Detroit Free Press.