The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1889-02-23
PuNoENT PARAGRAPHS.

PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS.
Patti says plenty OF sleep is tho SO
cret of preserving ones beauty. Th,
hired girl believes this.--Boston Cour
ier.
-Olive--"I do not think I am quit.
myself this evening"" Jeanette
"Allow me to congratulate you."--
Life.
Anybody can tell you what to take
for a cough. The man who can cure
one has not yet appeared. N. o.
Picayune.
An experiment recently made in
Scotland proves that the tortoise can
walk a mile in four hours. When COM
pared with the boy who delivers par
cells from the stores the tortoise has no
flies on him. m.-.Detroit Free Press.
She was decorating her room with
pictures. and she perched her hus-
bands picture on the topmost nail;
then she sat down to admire her work,
and remarked. quietly, "Now every
thing is lovely, and the goose hangs
high"
--Dumley (whose credit is not first
class)-1 say, Brown, can you lend me
$40 for few daysp" Brown (reluct-
antly pulling out roll of bills)-'I-er
--s'pose I'll have to, Dumley." Dumley
-"Thanhs. You seem to have plenty
of money, old fellow" Brown-"Yes. I
seem to have more money than brains"
IN. Y. Sun.
IL notice in the paper" said Mrs.
Barracks, pouring out Mr.. Barraclt' s
coffee, "that a Brooklyn clergyman
says that women should be permitted
to whistle" "Yes," retorted Mr.. Bar
racks, agreeably. "He is right. We
should surely not deny to women a
privilege we accord to tug boats and
locomotives. "-Harpers Bazaar.
Where Larders Are Full.-Young
Tramp-"Let's break into the kitchen
of that big house tonight, and git
something to eat" Old Tramp-"We
wouldn't find much there. Them folks
puts on too much style. Git into the
kitchen o. steady-goin'. old-fashioned
folks ef yer want ter strike a banquet"
IN. Y. Weekly.
-Tom-"I dreamed last night that
/ had died" Harry-''That was cer-
tainly mosthorrible dream" Tom
But there was a still more horrible
experience connected with it." Harry
-"Indeed. What was it?" Tom-"I
had to read the obituary poetry that
some well meaning but unpoetical
friend wrote about me-"
An Augusta store: Genial and io-
cose proprietor. Enter lady. "Is Mr..
A. IMP" "He is not, madam" "Do
you know when he will be in?" ~ do
not" "Will find him at his house if
l call there?" "Do you take this for
an intelligence Office, MADAME" asked
the proprietor, "Not after l look at
your face, SIR" and the door slammed
after willowy feminine form.-Au-
gusta (Me.) journal.
That delicious and juicy fruit, the
orange, is often refrained from in COM
pany because "it is SO hard to eat it
gracefully" In its native haunts it is
managed thus: In Havana the orange
is served whole on the table, peeled
down to the juicy "meat of the fruit"
and you present the golden ball to your
lips on the prongs of fork. A Florid-
ian fashion is to cut the orange in half
and pass its juice and pulp to the
mouth with Il teaspoon.
-'.Mrs. Graham, said the young
man, 81 have traced to you the story
that l have been divorced fourteen
times and arrested seventeen for cruel
ty to my wife, and / would like an ex-
PLANTATION" "Mr. Bailey, l am GER
tainly astounded. The only story
have told about you lately is what you
informed me last Thursday-that you
mad just been engaged" "NIay ask
'ou where you mentioned that9"
"Why, certainly; it was at the Friday
sewing circle. e."-Time.
Col. Plunger Extraordinarily -
"Ah Miss Grace, you handle the rib
bons wonderfully. Quite woman af-
ter my own heart. l inherit love of
you know. My father, the
General, was a superb tandem driver
in his time" Miss Grace calmly
"Yes, have heard of the Generals
early efforts in driving"-"Ah!-may
you-P" Miss Grace
We'll, you see, grandma told me of it.
She was often passenger in the canal
boat drawn by the first tandem driver
by your father"