St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-10-06
letter GO" COLUMN
4 Collection of Pertinent
Paragraphs, and Sayings
Of Minneapolis Men.
IN Interview With a Cigar
Sign--Unele Loren Flet-
eher's Stories.
& Theatrical Mans Views on
Advertising - A Good
Story On Judge Hicks.
q Few Casual Remarks Upon
the Famous AmeS In
tePVieW.

chumps."
These words. uttered i'll a soliloquiz-
Inc tone. startled GLOBE reporter one
morning last week as he was crossing
the steel arch bridge on his way back
from ali East side fire. At first, on
looking around, he could see no one,
but closer scrutiny disclosed the we'll
known features of the wooden image OF
Puck. which does duty as a cigar sign
AT the corner of Third street and Nicol-
let avenue. Puck was wearing an ulster
several sizes too large for him, for the
night was chilly. The reporter greeted
Puck as an old acquaintance. and eX-
pressed surprise at seeing him out so
late, or, rather, early, for it was about 3
q. ID.
ooh. YES: I come out occasionally for
a little recreation and to get away from
tie other cigar signs. TO be frank with
Won they are not quite up TO me III brain
mower. and it is trying to associate con
stantly with ones uncqualS. ! gu see 4
an, quite an old man and have seen a
good deal OF the world in my time. You
may have seen what Billy Shakespeare
has said about my trip around the earth.
That was. OF course, all pure lmaglAa-
<+iOn on BilIy'S part. Billy Was good
elbow, fond Of a social glass and all
that. but he had a sort of bug in his
head Strange to say his spirit is still
troubled the same way. But mention
Bacon 10 Bill ShakeSpcare's ghost and
the air will be blue with abuse OF the
attempt of that hog to eat upeperythlng
good in old English learning"
What is the matter with your cigar
stand companions that you can't assO-
Ciate with them?f
"Oh. they are not my style. They
are too frivolous or too vulgar. Now
there is that girl who stands on the cor
npr of Third street and Hennepin ave-
nue. She used 10 live in ancient Greece.
but has forgotten all her early training.
The Simpering air with which she stands
there on the corner. sort of Come
buy my flowers lock. diSguStS me. Then
that Indian on the north side of Henne-
pin avenue. below Third street, is a
pretty fellow, but his auctiOne2r atti-
Jude is too much for an old Sixteenth
century gentleman who knew Billy
Shakespeare The irl-With-Slinl-ankIe,
who stands on the south side of NicOl-
let lust above Sixth street. IS about the
incest girl in the cigar sign variety, but
she is too cOqucttiSh. However, she
will get over that, | hope. Sam Scalp
litter, Just below my station there on
NicOllet. would be decent fellow If it
were not for his low tastes. lie is an
Old mOuntaineer. and has no love for
frivolous modern society, but, as the
gun he holds and the way he glances
toward the gutter indicate, he will
shoot SnipcS.'
when came along here. Puck, you
inN of of
fools. What gives you such OpiniOnS?"
WHY. the way these MmneapOlitans
act They do not know what is good
for them. For instance, look at this
bridge. That old suspension thing there
will fall some day and several persons
will be hurt. The twin TO this steel
arch affair should be put up there as
quickly as possible. Then the wants of
the city at this point would be supplied.
This water power company seems to
think that it OWNS the Mississippi.
Then, see the way Doe kilyingtOn is
being jumped on. Doc may not be the
greatest physician on earth. but he is
huStling health officer. No doubt his
crematOry smells a little, but / am an
Old-timer and have seen a good deal,
and believe that with careful expert
menting that cTematOTy could he made
to do its work satisfactorily.
"YOu newspaper fellows ought to know
something about this exposition matter.
The directors Of that mammoth failure.
OF nearly one, are all looking for the
best of it. They are too much taken up
with their own schemes to make capital
out of their connection with it to give
any heed to the needs of the enterprise
am an old show man and my opinion
IS entitled to some respect when l say
that man vino is experienced in cater
ing to the amusement loving people is a
prime necessity in the managerial place.
Now. want to tell you one thing
more. The people of Minneapolis are
10 blame for this AmeS business.
Ames is good fellow, but every time
he gets keyed up a little with f1attery
and adulatiOn, he is sure to SlOp over
The public have made him apply that
Old saying, common in my time, to him.
self, viz: The king can do wrong.
You newspaper fellows also help to 70
ment these QuarrelS. Thank God there
were no newspapers when l was a
young man.
We'll. my boy. l have talked to YOU
a good while now. and am getting q
little chilled. Tell the GLOBE readers
my reasons for being out here some
times O'nights. so that if any of them
ever meet me they will not be
frightened.
Good night"
=
DR. S. s. KilvingtOn says he is salts
fed that the stencil which is knocking
out the people in the Second ward does
not come from the crematOry. A great
many OF his friends agree with him and
have been helping him to find some
other cause for it. They have been
calling at his Office and telling him
about burning peat bags. rubbish piles
manure heaps, etc. Yesterday another
new cause was brought to light. 1t is
claimed that the engineer at the Pills
bury elevator has been burning chaff in
tie furnace. If this thing keeps VI
ond ward will become So faStidiOuS that
they will demand that health inspector
be detailed for every house to see thai
nothing is burnt but hard coal.
=
If any one will start a perfume factory
In East Minneapolis he can probably
get sufficient bonus to make it an OBJ
ject for him.
O. II. Hall, president of the Wood
pecker club, reports that the house com
mittee, which was instructed at the last
meeting to hire a readheaded darky
for janitor, failed to find that kind of a
gentleman. and so. as a last resort, they
have hired a bald-headed darky, who
agrees to wear red wig while OH duty.
-
J. Junius MeHale was a good deal
taken back yesterday Whena gentleman