Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1889-10-11
sOME OBSERVATIONS.
By v. B. HOLLAND.

SUEE Uz5SEfttf AtIL5ESs
By ". B. HOLLAND.
y - "A LII s coming.
~ - This may strike
- Csss5s 8StSYA & h e reader as q
E,sSS.S5A a. slSS staggering q 81 err
- SNe tion, but It was
...sls4s - 81 made only ft er
g. - &SsS1 areful research
szy5ss,A and can be recon-
e}S VNfsVF mended as relia-
w SW bic. The fall is
IN ~ an invention of our
rs -, Hebrew friends, to enable
RHS 4them to work off their sum
NE mer clothing, by announcing
8 fall In prices. The wealth
er VIII be cooler and mutt
lated socks viii be no longer
n style. Still ventilated socks viii
beat no socks at all. Our venerAtiOn
for the man who invented straw hats
Will soon disappear, as Will the straw
hats. The hats viii be boxed up to
be brought out again next spring. and
labeled, --latest Style, just Imported"
/ am glad fall Is coming. 1 dislike
warm weather, and it seems that it
mostly occurs In the summer time.
Last summer I would take q damp
water bath, put on clothes lately reno
waited and upholstered by my loving
wife, and 90 out to l-n Il . lawn
mower. I had rat rUn a lawn
me " Ell }hap Dabv cat mage, as there
is less noise ana danger. My wife
doesn't care how often upset the lawn
mower. Well, after gleefully running
the machine for an hour, L would be
sweating like q candidate at an cleo
ton and would stop and count the
blisters on my hands. My clothes
would all be clinging to me and 1
would have a rich, creamy smell like
piece of burnt rubber. This is not
pleasant to a man with aristOcratic
tendencies and the cRtarTh. I would
take another bath, using great vigor
and bar of brown soap. No use. A
man can't smell like new-mOwn limo
thy aRd run lawn mower at the same
time during the summer months.
Even julius Caesar or Lydia Pinkham
would find such an attempt futile.
Brains may be of great value in writ
ing a letter or in saving wood, but
they do a man no good in his efforts to
keep cool. A man might as we'll try
/ to keep an umbrella as to keep cool in
the summer. The more he exerts him
/ self to keep cool the hotter he will be.
! Still the summer has some advan-
/ tages. Eggs and butter are much
! stronger and invigOrating in July than
/ in November. Then again one does
not need buy so much coal, but that
! fact viii not lessen his coal bill.
During the summer months L would
HE myself to the barn, and, seating
myself in the hay NOW, I would gayly
/ write q imam with one hand and fiObt
/ flies with the other. The greatest
! trouble about writing where flies are
so plentiful lies in the fact that your
work is liable to be profusely punctu-
ated.
Another little animal that makes the
summer interesting is the chigger.
! This charming, petite creature, with it's
! iron complexion and afectiOnate dis
/ position, Is indigenous to all climates.
! His greatest fault lies in the fact that
! he Is not big enough to whip and he is
! too big to pass unnOticed. On the
! blank desert of a summer in the cOun-
! try the chigger stands in all his glory
! and says, Forget me If you can" OF
! the early life of the chigger little is
! known. He seems to have no ambition
to do better and no hopes of q future
! life. He settles on the very spot you
! don't want him and commences i'm
/ proving his claim. You Immediately
! take measures to remove him, but if
/ you succeed in securing his claim, he
/ has left a large and vigorous mortgage,
so to speak, that will attract more at
! tentiOn and develop better staying
| qualities than did the chigger. &c hi.
CTgO Ledger.