Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1889-10-31
WHY ABE RESIGNED.
Political Honors Are a MOckery
and a DelusiOn.


ez constable O the Lost Grow Barren
deestric', Squire remarked the Old
Settler, with show of unusual inter-
est in the subject.
He has, hay?" said the Squire.
''Wall. faint noways likely th't the
ship O. State is gointer be shuck up
much or be slammed and banged agin
the rocks to any alarmin' degree, is it,
cause Abraham hain't gOinter con-
stable no more? Is tn any danger O.
the Constitution bein' splintered.
Major? Is the commonw ealth shakin'
from center to ci'cumfer nce?"
We'll. mebbe not" replied the Old
Settler. THE ship o. State an the
Constitution proberly is sailin' plumb
an holdin' stiddy. but FIN all th't
hear Lost Grow Barren is in the agi-
tatinest state o. mind over Abe's quit
tim ez constable th't any deestric'
ever were. Nobody didn't hev no idee
th't Abe were gointer quit, an it
dropped down on the deestric' like a
ton O. lead. They don't talk bout
nothin' else. The dominie's APP
proachin' donation, an sign o. bar,
even, has had to take back seat. Do
we know 'Zek'el Glazer o. Lost Crow
Barren. Squirrel"
'Pve heerd th't he were man ez
had made his mark over thar" said
the Squire.
so he has, b'gosht" exclaimed the
Old Settler. Hes made his mark
over thar, and it's mostly made on
notes an due bills! Wull, 'Zek'el is
mixed up in this constable business
him and Gabe Owens an brindle
cow. If l were Abe Fendle I'd hev it
out O somebody's hide fore 1 got
through with it, or I'd know the
reason fer why. Abe were runnin'
fer constable ten or fifteen year fore
he got elected. Every town meet
in he put hisself in the hans
of his friends. jest ez regular ez
town meetln' kim round, but the hans
OF his friends didn't never seem to git
clutch on Abram strong enough to
lift him up an set him in the splint
bottom cheer at the constable's office.
So las spring Abe he stuck himself in
the hans of his friends some more, an
tot EN- b'gosht'lmighty. th't if they
didn't snatch him an tumble him inter
bein' constable that time, he'd jist quit
an lay down. an mebby pass down in
sOrrer to an ontimely an disciplined
grave. He toll 'em th't he 'spected
'em to rally like one man. an show
the t'other side th't some things KID
be did ez well ez others, if not more
SO. Wull, they rallied. an that night
wen Mrs. Abram Fendle went to bed
she were constable's wife an no mis-
take. fer Abram were 'lected. Some
folks said he wouldn't ha' been 'lected
If the man th't were runnin' agin him
hadn't up an died with appleplexy
fore the lection were over, so th't tn
want no one to vote fer but Abram;
but mebbe that were a campaign lie
Abram were lifted clean up an
chucked into bein' constable O. Lost
Grow Barren. an / s'pose he an his
family growed more'n foot apiece
Him an his rallyin' friends had a re-
j'icin'. an Billy Crunly made speech
an toll Abe, bgosh. to go ahead, to be
just an fear not. pledged but to truth.
to liberty-an' law. No faver SWANS
We, says Billy. an no fear can awe.
an hew to line. says he. let the chips
fall where they may. Abram said he
would, or else he wouldn't deserve to
hev the right to run his feller-citizens
tothe county Jail. an to levy on their
goods an chattels whenever the
statues in setch case made an pervided
called him to his duty. b'gosh. an he
hoped they wouldn't forget it. Abram
were quite a stumper. an he made a
speech tibet folks said ID mebbe land
MIN In the sheriff's office, or mebbe in
the Legislature. An now he's knocked
over the hull business an Quit con-
stablin'. an tn amt no tellin wat the
Z eend III be, fer Abram is cut up wuss,n
a hog at a killin'
lex elGlazer got mixed I'M in this
constable business sumpin' bout ez
follers: He had neighbor, an this
here neighbor were achin' to build a
smoke house, but wen he looked the
matter over he found th.t he didn,t
hev no lumber. He had a brind,a cov
but no lumber, an ez he couldn't thirL
. no way th't he KID work his brirdIe