davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

1t is notable that ex-Presidens Cleveland
and his wife attracted mOio attention at
the great centennial celebration than the
President did. Dir. Cleveland has many
of the sturdy qualities of manhood and
strong convictions Of duty that character
lied the first President, and we do not
doubt, if George Washington should be
President fer four years at this period oil
our history, with politics st their present
stage of development that he would be the
most thoroughly unpopular man to be
found, no matter which party he belonged
to His Ratchet would fall in unexpected
places as CT old. 1t is, however, impossi.
BILE, to conceive George Washington as
anything but an honest, high minded Dem
ocTat, steering by the chart Of the Cot
stitution, that standard which he insisted
upon erecting for the aim and guidance Of
all wise and honest Americana.-N Norfolk
Landmark.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15
Josh Billings's Philosophy.
New York Weekly

Affeckshun liz a vine full ov tendrils, and
if yu don't phurnish it sumthing better few
climb it will phurnish itself SUMMING
wuss: this ackyunts for its running alter
sore eyed lap dogs and sick monkeys
Poverty is the step-mother ov genius.
Beware ov the man who makes Still
noizs when he walks, and who purrs when
he talks; he is a kat in disguise.
It il now 80 years ago since phellow
with green goggles on and white necktle,
offered few sell me sumthing for 5O cents
which he sed was worth 8 dollars. I've
forgot what it waE, but remember It wa2
a beat, and az often az once year ever
since have tried the same thing over, ano
got beat every time.
Mi friend has got his phailipgs, and tha'
liz one thing that makes me ike MIN b
mulch.
When shame leaves man, the kanois
goes out and his soul gropes its way IL w
dark, slave tew mean and brutal pasnuus
Civilisashun hax made justiss one ov thu
luxnrvs for which we hav tew pay its high
est price.
Lies are like bad penny--sdre tew re
turn to their owner.
"Time il money" Menny people TAX
this saying in its literal sense and under
take tew pay their debts with it.
Competishun is a good thing, even amunl
| brutes: two dogs on farm mako boil
dogs more watchful.
Originality in writing haz alwus beel
| uraized: but I hav red sum authors VIII
were too original tew be interesting.
Altho the learned and witty often cate
to the rich, thare never was enc YET, nov
ever poor, who wonld swap estates Wit
them.
If a man il very bizzy he kant be yer.
sorrowful, nor very vicious.
If thare IL emmy human being that thol
oughly loath, it il the one who haz nothinI
tew boast ov but hiz munny-a mere wore
magn fled into an ass by hiz welth.
! One oy the saddest sights ov all few me
| " an old man, poor and deserted, whom
once knew living in ease and luxury.
| don't think the world haz ever seen
sparkling, brilliant wit yet who was &C
troubled at times with the-hiccups.
Silence il one ov the hardest kind ov al
guments tew refute.
The fust thing in this life tew be desired
in the phiskal line,i IL happy set OF diges
tive apparatus; after that virtew and brane
are in order.
Justiss now dazs amt worth what
kosts.
I've seen men so fun-proof that u koulo
MT fire joke into them with double bal
relied gun.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

THE WONDERFUL PROGRESS OF THE
SOUTH Dow, Jones g. Co.'s financial Cir
cular of May contains an interesting story
of recent observation IN the South made by
Mr.. G. 3. Hopkine, of New York. Mr..
Hopkins visited the eotton and iron regions
of South Carolina, Georgia and Alabama,
and the coal and iron country of East Ten
nessee. The improvement of the sections
VISITED in five years has been phenomenal.
Manufactures have increased wonderfully.
A remarkable eireumstapce Of the develop
ment of the country was the fact that ,E vas
being ffected by Southern men and largely
by Southern capital. In the hill country
the money-makiug spirit was keen and ag-
cressive. In South Carolina cotton mills
pay from 70 to 25 per cent. on the capital
| invested. Labor ie abundant and steady,
and as Mr. Hopkins said, ''not get demon
alized by labor organisations" The earn
ing power of southern railroads very much
impressed Mr. Hopkins. Those in the
states visited have profitable present bus
inefs in cotton, tobacco, lumber, coal, ore,
&c., and the future has great deal il
store for them. A number Of the Southern
roads be found in first class physical oondi-
ton. The csnsns of 1890 will show rev.
CLINTON 10 the South.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

The Boston Globe has this To say over a
much discussed topic: The sermon delivered
by Bishop Potter, ofNew York, during the
centennial celebration, which has aroused
such q storm Of indignant comment from
Republicans, derived its chief significance
from the fact that in 'hA front pew sat Ben
iamin Harrison. President Of the United
States. We suspect that the sting of the
Bishops words lay in the involuntary con.
trast which everyone who heard them was
forced to draw between the man who sat
there as the President of the Repablic aud
the man whose memory was that day hon
ored as the fouuGer Of the Republic. That
was comparison anything bat 14ttering
to Mr.. Harrison. He had d0Dbtless ex-
pected the good Bishop to stoop TO flattery.
When he heard him tell the plain, uuvarp-
ished truth it probably made him feel small
and it certainly made him feel angry.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

Tue RULE FOR OUR QUIDANoE.-Rey.
Robert Collyer in his sermon last Sunday
week in the church Of the Messiah in New
York city said:-
81 notice that there has been some differ.
eucs of opinion about the good taste of the
Bishops remarks. There can be only one
opinion among true and thoughtful AmeTi-
cans. The coed bishop was timely and
right when he spoke those true and brave
words. We must watch the tendencies OF
the times. We must stand by our own con
victions and allow no abuses to corrupt our
Inheritance and the great and holy trust
that has come down to us. We are jealous
Of trusts, but here is one that we cannot
guard too previously. The rule fol our
guidance is to hold sacred what Washing
ton held sacred-truth, right, freedom,
honesty and honor-and see that they do
not suffer at our bands. IL we are as true
to cur trust as he was to his there are no
fears about the safe maintenance of the
Republic of the United States"
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15
For the SPECTATOR. J
A BOY-PLAN OF LIFE.

A brace of boys went out to play
Upon bright December day,
AS balmy as the breath of May
They gamboled DER the ample ground,
And ran the gauntlet round and rouno'
RThen sat down on grassy MOUND.
Bob. to his younger brother said'
.How Row. would you get meat ana preao
Ifyour dear parents both were oeao
Row looked, as oft wiseacres do,
And said, I'D farm the summers through
But in the winters, game pursue"
nd be o farmer, then, you see.
Aud very Independent be
With time enough to hunt Vice."
I'D FILL" said Rob. with thougntiui lace'
A lawyers or doctors place,
Or be minister of Grace"
uAnd so would learning have ana RANK
Some money in savings bank,
And pretty home like uncle Frank
Time hurried on, the moments few,
And up the boys to manhood grew,
When they some calling must pursue.
But each forgot the little plan
That through his mind in boyhood ran'
When he became settled man.
Rob did what Roy had thought TO DO
In that December interview,
And Roy the thing Bob purposed to.
Rob, as a farmer in the race
Ofnfe, filled an important place,
But Roy, the preacher was of Grace.
Nor should we think it very strange
To find in Rob and Roy this change,
Since neither could the future range.
And now, my little readers, pray,
Whatever you may do or say,
Be good and true both night and day.
Athens, Tenn. R. M, FUTILE
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

THE PRESIDENTS BROTHER.-It has
remained for President Harrison to make
himself responsible for the most pro-
noupced acts Of Depotsm in the history of
tho government. General Grants record
in this respect was notable, but he bever
went so far as to give an own brother an
official commission.
The appointment of Major Harrison to a
Federal marshalship is particularly bold
defiance of public opinion, from the fact
that the popular disapproval of acts of that
description has been so clearly expressed of
late years. It comes directly upon the
heels OF the Centennial celebration OF the
Inauguration of Washington, who con-
demned family appointments in ringing
W ords which, just repeated. are fresh in
the ears OF the peope.-N. Y. World.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

''Boss." said the old man, cts mItily
trubbled wild de confoomiterry rumatiz.
Did yer uvyer hev dat?" We denied all
knowledge of such disease "Well, boss
you's er happy man. When yer gifts de
confoom:terry rum aSiz, yer'll wish dat yea
nuss had dropped yer in de fab whom yer
wur err baby, an' burnt yer up" Ard he
groaned as he reached for a cigar stump
Looking around he saw nurse girl with a
pretty child 10 her arms. sDat's a nifty
purity chile. What 9eu0minashun Or hit? ,
"Dunno what yer mean by 'nomnashun,
Uu' Kiah,' said the girl. SIS de chile or
female gal er er male boy chile-'pears ter
me de more edicaiou yer Civ er niger, de
harder 'tis fer 'em ter unnerstar' plain
Newnited States tork," and he moved off
Disguised. Charlottesville Chronicle.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

The President is catching il from the
civil service reformers for removing Post
master Pearson, of New York. Il really
does seem as if he WIS led into a trap in
this case for if he had waited a week Or
two the death of Mr. Pearson would have
made a vacancy which he might have filed
and escaped all this criticism. 1t does not
make much difference, however, with his
Republican excellency what the civil ser
vice reformers say, even though his plat
form commits him TO that policy, for be
has within the past few days appointed his
own brother to district attorneyshp in
Tennessee and his old private secretary to
a similar place in New York. He has thus
emphasized the comparison made between
himself and President Washington. Nor
folk Landmark.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15
A Ridiculous Question.

"Do you enjoy good health ?" asked
Brown of bis friend Jones. The reply of
Jones was short, sharp and to the point.
"Why of course do, what fool doesn't ?"
Everyone enjoys good health when he has
it. Bnt SONS people do not have it to en-
Joy. Sick headache, biiousness, constipa-
tiOu, derangaa liver, and host of ills, real
and imaginary, are their heritage. Thous-
ands of pc, sons cure and prevent these dis
tressing complaints by taking DR.. Pierce's
Pleasant Purgative Pellets. Small sugar-
coated and easy to take; one dose.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

THE CHESTERFIELD OUTRAGE Simon
Walker, the negro who was brought to the
jail in this city last night fer fiendsh as
sault committed on the little twelve year
old girl, Mary Aun Quill, will probably be
kept here until the time of bis trial. His
arrest was made so quietly that but few
persons knew of it until he had been
brought here, else it is probable be would
never have reached Petersburg As it was
the man was in AFFECT fear when lie arrived
at the jail and asked to be put in safe
quarters. His Identification by the little
girl was beyond doubt. 1t is said that an
uncle of this man was lynched some years
ago 10 one of the lower counties for a like
crime -Petersburg Cor. Richmond Dis
patch
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

THE Cost OF THE CENTENNIAL. The
cost of the Centennial Committee of the
three days. show was about $240. 900, as
shown by the statement of expenditures
made 1p to date. The sum of $500, 600
was placed 10 the hands of the committee
for disbursement, and it is thought that,
with the bills yet to come in, the expenses
OF the show will about measure up even
with the receipts, SO that, with nothing
left over, either in the way of resources or
liabilities, the committee will come out
about even. The city Of New York, which
paid very small proportion Of the freight
about one-fourth-g about nine tenths
of the benefits. The hotels, the public
houses, the railroads, the theatres, the
street railway lines and the fakirs got the
lions share of the benefits, but the public
got view of the sights.-BaA. American.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15
1880 1880.
FGe q IA HB 2
The place TO buy
MEMS 4 BOYS FURhISA'G GOODS.

My Spring Stock is now complete, 1 have
bought the largest stock OF the season that will
DEPARTMENT.
Consists of full line of Scarfs in Puffs, Tecks
Fourth Hands and WindsoTettes Full Dress
Bows and all the latest novelties in these goods
DEPARTMENT
Collars and Cuffs. A full stock OF the latest
styles received every day. All of the latest
styles of East q Wilson.
DEPARTMEN
My line of Shirts sarpass any ever brought to
this market. The Gold and Silver are Inc nest
made for the money Plated. Plain and Fancy
"P, K.' bosoms. Next comes Negligee Polo
Flannel shirts. These goods are In all styles,
quality and prices.
DEPARTMENT
Hosiery-Lise Thread, Baibrig.an. In black
fancy stripe and solid Co ors.
DEPARTMENT. ..
Underwear-Lisle Thread, Balhriggan, eauze,
In colored and white, st all prices.
DEPARTMENT o.
Suspenders-My leader is the Celebrated At
wood. for which am sole agent, and all oths
er styles at prices 10 suit.
DEPARTMENT
Gloves-Kid, Dog skin. Castor. Beaver, I'm
dressed Kid, Calf skin. Buck, SILK and Isle
Thread
DEPARTMENT. S.
Um re las, Canes and satchels, full stock
DEPARTMENT o.
Handkerchiefs-Silk and Linen, in white and
bordered of the latest novelties
DEPARTMENT 10.
Jewelry-Cuff-eo Gas. Seari-pils, Collar but
tons, Shirt Studs, Cuff and Sleeve holders,
DErAGAG0ENT
Hats-all the latest Spring shades and styles
Silk, Deroies, Felt and Straw,
DEPARTMENT
Tailor-made Clothing to order My line OF
Spring samples just received. II will paw Won
TO call and examine prices before purchasing
else where. A perfect ht guaranteed or no sale.
THESE goads are made at the largest Tailoring
establishment IN the world Jacob Reeds Sons.
Fhliadeiphia, Gail and see me an will save
you money, am yours truly,
JAS. III WOODWARD.
lS +. Main St., Staunton, Va.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

CONFINED TO HIS Room MIR. Smithkins
How is your husband, Mrs. Jonesworthyi
haven't heard word from him since
have been gone.
Mrs. Jonesworthy-He is very poorly
Mr.. Smithkins--confned to bis room, in
fact.
Mr.. Smithkins-Indeed! He was such ar
| active man, too. How do you manage t.
keep him contented at home?
Mrs. Jonesworthy-Oh be isn't at home
He is in states prison.--Burling'on Free
hess.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

THE MATURE AND IMMATURE MIND
4 beg your pardon, sir, but find this
realise on representative government al
most incomprehensible. have come to
return it,"
"What's the matter with it?''
cit abounds in classical, scientific and
other illusions and contains an immense
number of words which am obliged to look
up in the dictionary, and when have done
SO find them marked Obsolete"
''Ah, see. 1t was mistake. This
work is intended to be used in schools.
will give you another treatise on the same
subject for grown readers that can be un-
derstood. "-TSme.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15
Washington's view of appointing office
hOldarS.

From the address delivered by Bishop
Potter in New York city on April Both, the
centennial anniversary of the Inauguration
of Washington, we make the following ex-
tract
"The conception of the National Gov
eminent as huge machine, existlng MALI
" for The purpose of rewarding partisan ser
vice-this was a conception 80 alien to the
character and conduct of Washington and
his associates that it seems grotesque even
70 sneak of it. 1t would be interesting to
imagine the first President Of the United
states confronted with some one who had
ventured to approach him upon the basis
| of what are now commonly known as ''prac-
teal politics." But the conception is i'm
possible The loathing, the outraged ma
| iesty with which he would have hidden such
a creature to bcgoue is foreshadowed by the
gentle dignity with which, just before hif
Inauguration, replying to one who had the
strongest claims upon his friendship, and
who had applied to him during the progress
of the "Presidential campaign" as We
should say, for the promise of an appoint
ment to Office, he wrote; 'In touching up0r
the more delicate part of your letter, tnt
communication of which fills me with rea
concern, will deal with you with all tina
frankness which is due to friendship, ant
which I wish should be characteristic fea
ture of my conduct through life. =
Should it be my fate to administer the Coy
eminent, will go to the Chair under nj
Encouragement Of any kind er nature
whatever. And when in it | will, to thu
best of my Judgment, discharge the dutie
of the Office with that inpsrtiality and yea
for the public good which ought Heger T,
suffsr conneetiong of blood or friendship tt
have the least sway on decisions of q pabli
nature"
On this high level moved the first Presi
dent of the Republic. To it must we VIII
ara the heirs of her sacred interests be no
unwilling 60 ascend. if we are to guard GU
glorious heritaget''
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15
A DECISION OF INTEREST TO FARMERS.

A DECISION OF INTEREST TO FARMERS
"A dispatch from Lincoln, Neb., says the
Supreme Court has decided question of
interest to money loaners. Growing corn
has been mortgaged, SO after coming to
maturity it was harvested and sold to grain
dealers. The owners Of the mortgage sued
them for the value Of tbs corn. The cour
decides that growing corn is not the cort
after it has been cribbed and sold, or in
other words, that the mortgage will not
hold good and the plaintiff cannot recover.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15
A Western PostMfice.

Tenderfoot lin new Kansas town.
"Where is the postoffice ?''
Resident "Over there"
'sWhere ."
sDo you see that man saving wood
He's the postmaster"
yes but don't see the postoffice."
"Of course You don't. Its in his hat
Nep York Weekly
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15
FURNITURE. RI at 81 G
IVSHRlOGH BROYHGRR { 10,
Manufacturers of and wn olesale and retail
dealers in
PARG0R AND RED-ES0N SUITS.
SH airs, Mattresses, Ect.
ll2 WEST MAIN ST,
@TAUNTON, VA.

Four years ago, we established business in
small way. II has gradually grown into large
proportions and now we can offer as superior
and com piele stock of goods in our line and al
SO made TO order can be found anywhere.
In the special department of Mattresses and
Uphols.erirg we are sure that the, most COM
plete satisfaction will be given in the future as
has been ,!.e case In the past We~take con-
tracts Tor AID execute church and other up
holste1ine in the very best manner and guar
antee all work to please.
THE EEsTAKENG DEPARTMENT
is another speciality in our business which re
ceives fall nd prompt attention. Wood. Me
talic and cloth covered Burial Caskets of va
rious designs including those covered in white
satin velvet MIR. WM d. GAMBLER. so well
known in this community as an undertaken is
now permanently With us.
The man ncacturing department and ware
rooms are convenient, roomy, well equipped.
Onr warerooms and Mattress and Uphoister-
ing departments are still under the manage
mentor Mir. j. P. Kice of our concern.
Orders for tiie undertake g departm ent, when
the wareroonls are closed. can be left at the
residence of Mr.. Kice 207 South Church Street,
or st Mr.. Can oilers Ill Prospect Street
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

Monkeys are not noted for preparing for
the future, and yet they are four-handed
animals. Pitsburg Chronicle Telegraph.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

The horse rarely speaks, but when he
DOES it ia Eith decidedly neighsal twang'
-Earpsr' sBageg.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

PROOF. ooh, of course she marries
him." said the young lady, opening new
navei.
"What makes you think sos'' queried
the young man.
'sWhy. right on the top of the first page
it says, Chap Won.'"
,, And yet some persons say woman can't
pun.-Norristown Herald.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15
Bishop Keane Secures o Fine Portrait of the

rope.
Among the passengers Landed at New
York Sunday morning week by the
steamer Umbria from Liverpool was the
Right Rev. DR.. John j. Keane, Bishop Of
Jassa, and director of the Washington
Catholic University, who went to Rome
last November in the interests OF that edu
cational scheme. The Umbria landed hel
passengers about o'clock, and the Bishop
was met on the dock by the vice-rectol
of the university, Rev Father Garrigan,
who escorted him to the house of the Paul.
list Fathers, Fifty ninth street, where he
remained until Monday, when he left fol-
Boston.
In an interview with the New York cor
respondent Of the Baltimore San, he thus
states how he obtained for the Catholic
University at Washington City
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

When the elephant travels he doesn't
bother about having his trunk checked
Detroit Free Press.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

A western circus man calls his lion Au
rora, because-well. because he is one.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

A young man In town says the best kind
Of 9 Eetre to save gas is ''neet her by
moonlight alone. "-Norristo}0n Herald.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

II was anxious to have a good likeness
of the Pope, SO I secured the best artist
could in Rome aud asked the Pope to give
him sittings. No." said the Holy Father,
L have portrait which hung in the jubilee
exhibition, and which l intended should
hang in the Vatican, but prefer to give it
to you for the university, if you think it
good enough He had two men hang it mp
with great trouble in one CT the halls, and
when l came to see it some days after was
delighted with it. 1t is painted by Ugelini,
and represents thu Pope sitting in chair.
and is an excellent portrait. When l had
looked at it, Mgr. Augeli said: 'Nov you
have seen the picture, the Pope wants to
see you.' But l said, 'Monseignor,1 am
not in proper dress to pay him visit.
When they told the Pope this he answered,
Il don't care what dress he has on. want
to see him, not his Dress So went IN in
this democratic fashion, and when told
him how pleased I was with thu portrait he
had it at once boxed up for me, and il 10
do9p in the custom-house now The inau-
gural dinner we had in honor Of the univer
sity on March 10 you have already heard of
by cable, but everybody said it was the
finest ecclesiastical dinner ever given in
Rome"
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15

Chronic nasal catarrh positively cured by
Dr.. Sage's Ren5dy.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-05-15
DARM FOR SALE
u ALESM EN

Wanted for our complete line of MI RSERY
STOCK ALI new, choice and Fast selling
Spee'aiijes I can furnish z A L \ q POSI-
'TION-5 to wOrS ers. Ny large experience in
the business enables me to offer special advan-
tagas 10 beginners. I can make a SUCCESS
Full SALESMAN of any one who will follow
my instruction. ArPermauent employ m en- t..
Wages paid each week. Outfit free Apply al
once and secure choice Of territory.
EDWARD 2. SHELL,
Nursery man, Rochester, N. Y.
fish 2G-3In Rg Mention this paper.