Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1889-07-20
HE HAD A RAT TRAP.
And He Was Determined That Its Merits
Should Not Go Unrecognized.


Should Not Go Unrecognized.
From the New York SUM-
1t was on one of the Sound steamers
coming down the other day. A man OF
middle age and much dignity had fallen
asleep in his rocking chair on the prom
enade deck, when he was approached by a
sharp-nosed, hawk-eyed man of 40, who
had parcel in his hand.
"Hey-youw he exclaimed, as he
slapped the sleeping man on the shoulder.
"Sirl How dare your" sternly de-
manded the latter, as he reused up.
81 haven't done anything that / can be
sent to State prison for, have II"
what is your business with me, sir ?"
"That's better. That's coming to the
point. Let me draw up chair and take
it easy as we chat. You told me at Ston-
ington that you thought you would order
twelve dozen as starter. Suppose YOU
double the order and take ten per cent.
discount? ~
"Sir What are you talking about, and
who do you take me for?" demanded the
mon.
"Your name isis Foxon - firm of
Foxon & Brown, dealers in hardware, isn't
it ?"
"No. sir"
"Whatt Why, I'd bet a farm agin a
wheelbarrow that it wasl Didn't we have
a conversation at Stonington ?"
"No, sir p
"Didn't / show you my centennial rat
trap and exhibit its workings"
"No, sir p
didn't demonstrate the fact that it
would catch and hold anything from a
mouse to a raccoon, and that the public
was bound to buy millions of 'em? ?"
"Siri Do you intend to insult me ?"
shouted the other.
"Not for Joseph. l never insulied no.
body. It's curious if l have made mis-
take. Didn't you spend half an hour yes
terday investigating my anti-friction,
double-leverage, anti-cogless centennial
rat trap, warranted to clean out whole
country of rats, mice, chipmunks, gophers
and rabbits inside of ten days, or no pay ?'
''No, sir! No, sir p
"Well, that's queer! I'd take my aff-
davy it was you. And you didn't order
twelve dozen to be shipped the first of the
week ~
"Never You ought to have more sense
and manners. sir Go awav about your
business
My business is to sell the centennial
rat-trap-only thing ever intended to en-
tlce rats without bait; no delicate ma
chinery to get out of order no cost for
steam power to run it. If | have made a
mistake | beg your pardon"
Then go away, sir-go away before /
forget my position and do you injury"
You wouldn't injure fellow for want
ing to sell you a rat-trap which lays over
all other inventions in America, would
you? If you amt the man who ordered
the twelve dozen, you may want to give
me an order, just the same. | will show
you how it works"
No, you won't Go away, sir-go, or
FL do you harm You are the most i'm
pudent rascal Eve met in a year,
And you won't look at my trap"
No, sirr
And you want me to leave you in soli-
tude ?"
:" AT once, sir p
=" Well, I'll do it. Some folks force their
inventions upon the public. That amt
my style. My centennial rat-trap speaks
for itself. | go, sir; but leave my card.
Peruse it at your leisure All mail will
reach me promptly at that address. Send
you a dozen on trial, or give you dis
count of five per cent. on all over three
dozen. Send in your orders as early as
possible, as the season is forward. Au
revoir, sir"