The Newberry herald and news. (Newberry, S.C.) 1884-1903, 1889-04-25
A Bil1y-Goat-

One Of the humorous episodesin the
book is the description of the character
and adventures of a bucking-goat once
owned in mining camp by Mr.. Pep
perell, and suggestiVely named "Per-
cussion." Of the general nature of
this animal, who would attack any
thing from an Indian to e landslide
Mr.. Pepperell said /:
'Nov, as you know, gentlemen,
there is a good deal of dynamite in a
billy-goat. 1t won't do to drop on to-
one suddenly, unless you want to be
lifted. Any man who runs against
goat without teiegraphing him be-
forehand, acts as if his business educa-
ton had been neglected. For a goat
is the embodiment of a terrific energy
when aroused, and nothing starts him
quicker than a sudden. appearance.
Any man who approaches him with
out circumspection is liable to lose
some part Of himself. More than one
man has lost his balance and his self
esteem by such carelessness. Both
these essentials of standing and char
acter are apt to remain absent during
the entire interview.
"a goat is endowed with great
quickness Of apprehension, and he
acts on his impulses. When a goat of
the masculine gender stands and gazes
at you with a look of curious delibe-
ration in his eyes, you will, ifyou are
a rational being, promptly pick the
nearest tree and get behind it. This is
the only wise course to adopt. Nor
should you be slow in doing this. It
is not safe to take any chances with
billy-goat if he is within fifty feet of
you and has in his own mind decided
Ia act. You can not rely on his remain
ing where he is any considerable
length of time. He is apt to move
suddenly, and when be moves he al
ways. moves in a straight line, and
with his objective point clearly in
view.
ITO know goat thoroughly, gentle
men, I am convinced that man
should begin his investigations in
childhood. The knowledge needed is
not acquired readily by an adult. A
man can pilot a steamboat better than
boy can, but to steer goat success
fully into paddock without any back
action of the paddler is feat at which
a boy will beat his. father every time.
The innocent sprightliness of early
life is an essential element of success in
such an undertaking. A deacon Of ma
ture age and dignity of character might
do it, but he would never be fit to hold
the Office after he had finished the job.
His record would be broken, as it were.
What he had gained in 1uency of ex-
preston he would have lost in resigna-
ton of spirit and the sweet placidness
of his vocabulary. A deacon should
always leave the management of a
billy-goat to his hired boy, and keep
out of hearing, too, when the boy and
the goat are in close communication.
Any material departure from this rule
will always result in unhappiness.
The manners of the goat will be spoiled,
and the deaeon-if the matter be fully
reported-will surely lose his office.
"a. goat is like any other highly Or
ganized creation. He learns evil fast
and forgets it slowly. He is a creature
of vanity and relishes success. After
he has learned a mans anatomy by
experiment, the knowledge is fixed in
his mind forever. Time may obliterate
the impression he has made on you,
but it never oblitrates the impression
he has made on him. Years may pass ;
your hairs may be whittier and his
coarser, but if be ever gets chance to
hit you again, your years and venera-
ble appearance will not save you. The
old reprobate will hit you in the same
spot. never been able to satisfac-
torily explain this to my own mind,
but the fact remains. I have seen it
demonstrated"