davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1889-06-13
HUMOROUS.

"A BARRIERS trust has been formed
In New York. OF course, it will
shave every body. Washington
Critic
-Four Oil City ladies met on one OF
our streets the other day and talked
five minutes without uttering a single
word of gossip A great many
strange things happen in Oil City.
Blizzard.
-Mamma-"Howard, are you going
to take part in the tree-planting at
school on Arbor Day." Howard
(emphatically)-"No, hain't; there's
huff switches CROWN round our
school now" Lille.
When Blooms Stop. -Eastorner-
IF understand the great land boom at
Dugout City has collapsed. West
erner-"Yes; no use keepin' it goin'
any longer. All the land now is
owned by outsiders. IN. Y. Weekly.
AT a Grocery Store.-Mrs. Snooz-
ers -"Land alive! What are you 60
ing to do, Mr.. Greengoods, with all
these coops of chickensp" Mr.. c.
"a great scheme of mine. Eggs laid
while you wait, you know. I'm tired
of the kicks against my eggs" Chi
cago Herald.
Miss Loveleigh-"I am afraid you
are rather hard on my sex, Mr.. Syn
icaL What comment have you to
make on the fact that four-fifths OF
every church assemblage are womenp'
Mr.. Synical-'l have but one COM
ment to make, Miss Loveleigh. There
is always man in the pulpit. "-Once
o Week.
mo, SIR" said the editor to the
poet Your work is rank plagiarism.
Now get out Well, what do you
want?n he added, addressing the
humorist. Il have some original
jokes" Don't want 'em. l can
get all the original humor l want on,
of my exchanges. Good morning. ~
Harper's Bazaar.
(which do you love most, your
papa or your mammal" Little
Chsrlie-'I love papa most"
Charles mother--''Why, Charlie,
am surprised at you. thought you
loved me most Charlie-"Can'i
help it, mamma; we men have to hold
together. Texas Siftings.
You look tired, Miss Brown; toe
much dancing?" oh. dear me, no
but we gave what is called an 'en
gagged dinner last week, where eighi
oetrothed couples were invited. and
afterward they retired to eight differ,
ent corners Of the two rooms and
whispered all the evening. and il re
minded papa and mamma SO much o.
their courtship they went out and sai
on the stairs and left me alone. Do
you wonder ! still look tir~de-
Funny Folks
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1889-06-13
IwoMAN's CAUSE is MANS.

The woman's cause is mans; they rise or sink
Together, dwarfed or godliko, bond or free.
For she that out of Lethe scales with man
The shining steps OF Nature, shares with man
His nights, his days, moves with him to one
goal,
Stays all the fair young planet in her hands
II she be small, slight-natured miserable,
How shall man growi As far as in use lies
We two will serve them both in aiding her
VIII clear away the parasitic forms
That seem TO keep her up, but drag her down.
viii leave her space to burgeon out Of all
Within her-let her mako herself her own
To give or keep, to live and learn and be
All that not harms distinctive womanhood
For woman is not undevoloped man,
But diverse: could we make her as the man,
Sweet love we're slain; his dearest bond Is this,
Not like TO like, but like in difference
Yet In the long years liker must they grow,
The man be moro of woman, she OF man;
He gain in sweetness and In moral height,
Nor lose the wrestling thsws that throw the
world;
Bhe mental breadth nor fall In childward care.
And so these twain upon the skirts OF Time.
Sit side by side, full-summed In all their pow
ers
Dispensing harvest, sowing the To-Be,
Self-reverent each and reverencing each,
Distinct in Municipalities,
But like each other even as those who love-
Then comes the statelier Eden back to men;
Then reign the worlds great bridals, chaste
and calm;
Then springs the browning race OF humankind.
From The Princess" by Tennyson.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1889-06-13
COORDINATE HUMANITY
No Sex of tho Mind-What the Evolution
of Society Is Reallzlng.

of Society Is Realizing.
In the evolution of society, says Rev.
Joseph B. Cottrell, ID. d., in the Wo-
mans Journal, there have been revolu-
tions, but all upon the heaven-ordained
axis and within the divinely appointed
sphere. That marks the individuality
of humanity as coordinate with the
ranks OF intelligence, beneath and
above. HE that breaketh hedge
shall be bitten by serpent" but the
field OF human privilege and enterprise
must be enlarged in spite ofthe snakes
Let us candidly inquire whether 1t is
wisest and most just to hinder or to
help the movement now being made on
behalf OF co-ordinating women with
men all along the lines Of industrial,
social, educational, governmental and
religious engagements.
There is no sex in mind. Examples
are so numerous OF the capabilities of
woman in every range of intellectual
life that 1t Is unnecessary to discuss this
question. 1t Is established that men are
all the greater whose touch and turning
OF personality approximate the woman
ly standard. Women are more potent
and effective as they possess those char
acteristics OF strength and courage usu-
ally denoted as masculine. The differen-
tiating finger-touch OF God has given an
inefiacoable distinction OF femininity
from masculinity, SO long as humanity
continues In this sublinary environment,
but we are assured that ''in the resur-
rection' these will be eliminted. There
is deeper significance in the words
that in Christ Jesus there is neither
male nor female" that the world OF
mind has yet apprehended.
The history, thus far, of our race dis
covers to the observant student that
questions of precedence have uniformly
been settled according to the rule that
might makes right. That women is
ruled out and off from the ways in
which she might develop her powers
more fully, and be at once more inde-
pendent OF, and helpful to, mankind
than she now is, results simply from
this same fact-might dominates.
Gradually, in the unfolding of the
stock of humanity, the organic life
principal Of equal right and privilege
to all asserts itself; and just rs In the
growth Of the corn there ere FIRST the
blades OF fodder, then the tasselling
then the sllking, so that from out the
shuck there is to como 1.-THE full corn a
length" even so has II been and does Il
promise to be in regard to human
atfranchisement The declaration thai
'all men are created equal was as the
tasselling of the stalk; now this move
ment of woman's Acknowledgement is a,
silking; and the full and complet,
sruitage prophesied in the Scripture
when the nations shall beat thei
weapons OF warfare into the nipple
ments of peaceful industry, will b.
reached. Woman in our counsels will
wonderfully qualify and reconditiol
the measures whereby 1.-The kingdom
of this world are to become the king
doms of God and His Christ"
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1889-06-13
PERSONAL AND LITERARY.

Mary Kyle Dallas, who has been
writing serials for quarter of a
century, has just published her first
book.
Constance Fenimore Wcolson, the
novelist. began her literary career as
a contributor to the amateur journal
of friend.
Harriet Prescott Spofford, the
author, lives at Deer Island. halfway
between Amesbury and Newburyport,
Mass, and she takes great pride in the
decoration of her home and her flower
garden.
"A copy of the first edition OF
Charles Levers works latoly sold in
England for $l,375. The craze for first
editions is now at its height and abb
surd prices are given for many modern
books which have little value as
literature.
Rev. Edward Beecher in 1854 pub
lished book on the pre-existence of
human life. His father, DIR. Lyman
Beecher, was asked what he thought
of the theory. We'll" he replied,
''if the Almighty has been running the
universe on this plan all these ages,
and has succeeded in keeping it a Sc
cret, | think it's shame for Edward
70 expose it"
One of the most remarkable feats
in modern journalism was once
achieved by Mrs. Isabelle B. Barrows.
of Boston. She wrote verbatim re-
port of a speech made in German by
Carl Schurz, which she turned into
English while her pen was flying
across her paper in stenographic char
acters To write geographically and
translate from German to English
simultaneously was a remarkable piece
of shorthand reporting.
Mr.. Swinburne says that the most
fattering homage ever paid to him
was by an old border gamekeeper with
whom he was accustomed to 60 out
when quite boy. This man used to
repeat to him legendary ballads and
stories, and one day the budding poet
summed up courage enough to repea,
an early effort-.an imitation of the
ballads he had heard. 1t took the
gamekeeper's fancy directly, and he
declared it as good as any OF the old
ones--a bit Of criticism which Mr..
Swinburne says gave him more pleas
ure than any thing he has heard since.
One day during the siege of Paris
shells from the Prussian guns began
to fall near the museum Of the Jardir
des Plantes, where M. Chevreul ther
had his laboratory. He sat down and
wrote King William q personal letter
in which he protested in the name O
science against the Smelling of the
garden and museum under his charge
and that, if continued, it would be ar
act of vandalism. The King appre
ciated this appeal. and the guns wer,
Immediately pointed in another direc
ton. Then the King sent the letter t.
a scientific journal, of which he hal
been a subscriber since its foundation
When the war was over the letter
translated back into French, wa
printed in Paris, and great was tn,
sensation which 1t produced.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1889-06-13
EDUCATIONAL EQUALITY.
Reasons For Advancing Women In School
Positions.

Positions.
The controlling reason for placing
women on boards of education is the
fact that they are less selfish than men.
The curse OF the race is selfshness,
and there can be no regeneration OF So
ciety until this vice Of the age is burned
and purged away by education.
1t may be said flippantly that sell
fshness is necessary to the preserva-
ton of the individual, and that altru-
ism is only an idle dream Of the opti-
mist But 1t is the sternest OF all stern
facts OF historic analysis, that in the
deadly grip Of sslfshness all the an
cient civilizations persisted.
II Is time for Americans to realize
that there is something better than the
Greek worship Of beauty, hotter than
the Roman lust of power. better than
the greed of the English. And this
better thing is right, truth, Justice
Justice TO all men, and to all women.
But this jewel OF great price is not tc
be picked up by chance in the market.
place, nor found like mama in the vii.
derness.
First Of all, il is not to be secured
without the aid of woman. She must
no longer be degraded; the theory o.
her inferiority must be abandoned a.
| rubbish; her equal interest with mar
in all the worlds affairs must be full,
and frankly admitted Conceded tn,
right to life. liberty and the pursuit o
happiness, she must be taken into ID,
absolute confidence Of society, snd in
vited TO keep step with man In tn
vesk Of molding its aestinies. An
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1889-06-13
WOMEN AND THEIR WORK.

THE State of Connecticut has law
which exempts all honorably discharged
soldiers and sailors in the State from
paying taxes on 81, 900 worth Of prop
erty.
WOMEN are at last permitted to prec-
tice medicine in Canada, and the first
to receive license is Miss Mitchell, of
Kingston, graduate of Queens Uni
versity.
MRS. S. A. SAWYER, OF Boulder, COL,
has been for ten years her husbands
business partner in the principal book
store OF the city. She is declared to be
mot whit less womanly" in conse-
Quence.
The South seems to be the home of
women journalists New Orleans has
q number OF them, and there are sever
al papers throughout Louisiana which
are edited mainly by women. One pa
per-the Carroll Banner-is the exclu-
sive property OF Mrs. Louise Garner,
who has entire control of the papers
policy.
DR.. JENNIE McCowEN, of Iowa, has
been unanimously elected president OF
the Davenport Academy OF Science--a
rare honor for a woman. The retiring
president declared that in resigning the
chair ''he did so with peculiar pleasure
to one whom he felt to be In every way
competent worthily to fill the official
position"
DIR. SARAH J. MILLsoP, of Bowling
Green, KY, is doing good work for wo-
men by removing prejudice against
women as physicians. She has built
up fine practice in her part of the
State, and last fall she was appointed
chairman Of the Bureau OF Gynecology
by the Southern homeopathic Associ-
ation-the first woman ever appointed
TO Office in that society.
The city charter of Detroit having
been amended to allow women to vote
for school officers, bill was immedi-
ately passed forbidding boards Of reg
istration to meet in rooms or buildings
where liquor is sold. This is the first
good result Of woman suffrage. Hith-
erto 1t has been common thing in De-
troit as in many other cities, to locate
the registration Office for voters in a
saloon. -Woman's Journal
| HENRY WARD BFECHER's sister Mrs
Isabella Beecher Hooker, said to a
Boston reporter on Sunday: IL hope to
see the day when we shall see a woman
President Of the United States Then
the whole English-speaking world will
be ruled by women. think
we shall have woman President OF the
United States before the ballot Is given
to women. Susan B. Anthony, for in
stance. Is the equal Of any man living
a. statesman and politician"
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1889-06-13
VOCAL MlMICRY.
An Account of the Art of ventriloqulsm
and How 1t Is Performed.

and How 1t Is Performed.
Ventriloquism is kind of vocal
mimicry by which an illusion concern
ing the origin and direction OF the
voice is produced. The etymology OF
the word, from venter, the belly, and
loquor, to speak, indicates the idea
formerly held concerning the manner
in which the sound is produced. 1t is
now, however, well known that the
sound does not proceed from the abdo-
men. The art was known to the an
clients, but not being understood by
them, it was supposed to indicate the
presence of familiar spirit, or de-
mon, which resided in the internal or
ganism of the speaker. The prohibit
tions against the use OF familiar spirits
in the law of Moses are believed to be
directed against this practice, and
the Hebrew phrase translated, "having
a familiar spirit" signifies in the orig
inal, speaking from the belly" The
famous responses OF the oracles among
the Greeks were most probably
produced by ventriloquism. By this
trick the diviners and soothsayers
obtained great influence over the
ignorant populace, and in spite of the
death penalty pronounced against
them by the Levitical law, they flour
ished among the Hebrews as well as
among other nations. 1t was sup
posed for many years after the old
superstitions concerning the art had
passed away that some peculiar con-
formation Of the vocal organs was
necessary for ventriloquism, but it
has been ascertained that in reality
no such popularity is needed, and that
the ventriloquist speaks, in practicing
his art, in precisely the same manner
as in ordinary articulations. ~ he
only difference" says DR.. Hammond,
lis in the mode of respiration. A
very full inspiration is taken, and then
the air is expired slowly through a
narrowed CLOTHS, the diaphragm beng
kept in its depressed condition and
the thoracic muscles alone being used
to empty the lungs" This can be done
without moving the lower jaw and
with but slight movement of the lips,
and If at the same time the attention
of the hearer is directed by skillful
and natural gestures away from the
ventriloquist and toward the point
which he wishes to have regarded as
the source of the voice, the deception
is usually complete. To quote from
DR.. Hammond again; at is at all
times difficult to determine the source
of sounds by the hearing alone, and
the only means by which the unassist-
ed ear can form an idea of the distance
of sound is by estimating its intens.
ity." 1t is therefore said that for sue
cess in this art the ventriloquist only
needs keen perceptions, an ear deli
cately attuned to the variations o.
sound produced by distance or direc
ton, and u strongly developed talent
for mimicry. With these qualifica'
tions any one can develop skill in ven
triloquism by practice. Chicago Inter
Ocean.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1889-06-13
MUCH LABOR LOST.
The Kind of Cats Tails an Old Ferme
RrnuYIt I'm Market

The Kind of Cats Tails an Old Fermep
Brought TO Market.
Old Farmer (sauntering into largo
dry-goods store bearing well-illed
two-bushel bag on his shoulder)-
Say, young Teller, is this whar they
buy cats tailsP
Clerk-Cat's tailsp
Eyes, cats tails.
'Great Scott, man, what do you
mean?"
"Meanp Why, mean jest whut I
say. Do yer buy emp"
''Certainly not never heard -
any body buying such things
"Never, eh?"
"Of course not"
oval, thar's somethin' quare erbout
it then. Why, err leetle while back
Their ele oman read in err paper whar
it wuz writ down tibet cat tails wuz in
big deman' an that city folks paid
fer 'em fer ornamentin' proposes.
Then l fell ter thinkin' on it. an it
come ter me tibet es Their wuz or power
O. cats erround, l could jest es easy
turn or few honest dimes es not, an
ercordin' went ter work an gethered
up that air bag full ov 'em, an
they're moustrous fine 'uns, too. Yer
shore they don't buy 'em, air yer?"
"Yes. But / think | understand
where you missed it. The cat tails
referred to by the paper are u species
of slough grass.
"Hey? An it didn't mean rale
shore huff cat tails er tall?"
mo"
"Wal, eff that don't jest nashuly
stump my taters. Why, say, I've put
in err whole month gittin' them air.
an Eve cut Their tail often every cat
fer ten mile Ground. Say, l bet yer
never seed SIGH er lot o bobtail cats
sence you war born es thar is up whar
l live."-Detroit Free Press.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1889-06-13
SCHOOL AND CHURCH.

In the city of New York there are
upward Of fifty able Methodist preach
ers who are paid less than $500 per
year.
In New York City the Catholics
have obtained $12,000,000 of public
money in the past fifteen years for
school purposes.
The number of colleges and insti-
buttons in the country is the same as
1t was ten years ago, but the number
of students has increased from II, 161
to 80, 316 in the same period.
Berlin is considered the most cos
mopolitan university on the globe,
having now $3.50 matriculated stu
dents, and 1850 who hear lectures, III
are Americans. Theological students
have greatly increased, there being
now $50. The rise is attributed to the
popularity of Harnack, the new pro-
lessor of church history.
Mrs Maria ST. John Sheffield,
widow of Joseph Earle Sheffield, the
founder OF the Sheffield Scientific
School of Yale University, died of
paralysis in New Haven lately at the
age of SS years. By Mr.. Sheffield $
will the homestead was to go to the col
lege after the death of Mrs. Sheffield.
The property is valued at $250,0
The trustees OF Mount Holyoke
Seminary and College met at North.
ampton lately and chose Miss Mary A.
Brigham. of Brooklyn, N. Y, presi-
dent of the college. The action was
taken under the reorganization OF
the seminary, with "a new charter
for women. Miss Brigham has for
twenty-seven years been associate
principal of Prof. Vests Brooklyn
Heights Seminary.
Andrew Ferguson, an old negro,
formerly slave, has presented Louis
vile Presbytery, Kentucky, with COM
pletely equipped church built on a
spacious lot, the furnishings including
fine organ. 1t is to be held as place
OF worship for colored people. This
last gift is only one of many more by
Ferguson since he secured his free.
dom. He is janitor of a bank, earn
ing about dollar a day, lives alone
in little attic, and does his own cook.
ing and washing. He is now in his
SEVENTEEN year.
For many years the Russian
Church has been doing missionary
work in Alaska, chiefly among the
Thlinkets of southeastern Alaska.
Sixty thousand dollars has been ap
propriated annually for this work
from the Imperial treasury at St
Petersburg, but in spite of the lapor'
of large band of priests and deacons
the success Of the movement has beer
small, and it is reported that "th'
strength of the Russian Church Seems
to be waning before the incoming o
American influences" whatever tina
may mean.
The American Sunday Schoo
Union has organized, during the pas
year. 1,75S Sunday-schools in thirty
one States and Territories in place
hitherto destitute of religious priv
ileges. 1t also gave aid to other need,
schools in 6,43S instances. In man,
cases. the schools have developed int
churches of different denominations
1t also distributed, by sale and gift
1858 Bibles and 1868 Testaments
and made 40, 041 visits to families. j
the winter its missionaries conducte
evangelistic work, and gathe, ell man
hundred souls into the churches
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1889-06-13
WAkIN' THE YOUNG uNS.'

THE old man from the foot OF the sta,rs-fye
a. M.
Bee-ull! Bee-ulll o. Bee-ull my gracious,
Air you still sleepin'?
IN hour hands crecpin'
Nearder FIVE.
oval, burned OF this ere amt vexatiousD
Don't ye hyar them cattle calini
An tn ole red steer a-bawlin'i
Come, look alive,
Git up! CT up!
Mar'ann! Mar'annl DIST hyar her snol IN D
Marannl it's hchoovin'
Tibet you be a-movin'l
Brisk, Isay.
Hyar the kitchen stove a-roarini
The kittle's a-spIlin'
Ter get hsse'f blin',
It's comm day.
Gitup Git up
Julel o, JULIE Now whut is ailn
You want ter resif
Wal, Til be blest!
S'pose them COWS
u give down milk 'ithout you palm.
You mus be gon' crazy:
Err more like, gettn' lazy.
Come, now, rouse.
CT upl Git upl
Jake, you lazy varmintl Jake Hey. Jakcl
Whut you layin' theer fur!
You know the stocks ter kecr fur;
So hop out
(That boy is wusser'n a rock ter wakeO
Don't stop to SILVER,
But jist unxiver,
An pop out!
Git up Git upl
Young uns! Bee-ull Jake! Mar'ann! Julel
OVAL durn my ornry skin!
They've gone ter sleep agn,
Fur all my telln'o
See byar, haint no time ter fool!
It's the las warmth
I'll give this mornin,
I'm done yelln.
Git up! Git up!
Wal, whut's tn odds-an hour, more or less
B'lieve II makes 'cm stronger
Ter sleep leetle longer
Thar in bed.
The time is comm fas' enough, guess,
When I'll wish, an wish 18th weeDin',
They was back up yender sleepin',
Overhead,
Ter ct up.
John Boss, in Boston Globe.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1889-06-13
Happy by Comparison.

Hello, McGinnis, you look blue
What is the matter?"
Matter enough. Boil on the back
of my neck.
BY George. old fellow, / sympa-
thize with you'll"
But you are not looking remarka.
bly, cheerful yourself. Winchester.
ANY thing wrong with you?"
My wife is cleaning house.
(Fervently.) Thank Heaven for
nv boil. Chicago Tribune.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1889-06-13
One Dollar Per Year.

the first and most natural step toward
the rehabilitation of woman with the
rights and privileges OF which she was.
at the outset, uniustly and by force de-
prived, is to make her an equal CO.
worker with man in the conduct OF all
our educational institutions. Detroit
Commercial Advertiser.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1889-06-13

Gold Meat Dish.-Take any sort OF
cold meat aud suet, mixed; chop very
fine; add salt. onions. minced ham or
tongue, a slice of bread soaked in
milk, two well-beaten eggs. one ounce
of butter; stew altogether gently for
fifteen minutes; turn it into a mold,
and bake till brown. Turn out on
hot dish and cover with the gravy
strained OF when nodded.