davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1889-12-24
NARh GOODS CIRE DIAMOND s,
ELKO, NEVADA.
Undertakings.

Having purchased Of Brown & Hos.
kins their interest in tho Undertak-
ing business, ! am now prepared to at
tend to all calls in that line. / will
also attend to the repairing and up
holstering of Furniture, etc. Shop
on Commercial street, next door u
Brown & Hoskins' old stand.
6-5 N. f. PETFPsoN
Wanted TO rent an upright pisno
Address Mrs. Il. s. Reeves
Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1889-12-24
Indurated Fibre Mare.

The attention Of the public Is. di-
fected to my new stock of Tubs,
Buckets, Basins, etc, manufactured
from Indurated Wood Fibre, pressed
put in one piece, without seams or
hoops. 1T Is light and durable, will
not shrink or swell, will not taint any
kind OF liquid and bids fair 20 super
ceds tin and wooden ware. Gail and
examine It.
II, CuAssN
Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1889-12-24

=
An immense stock
of Wallpapers, Bor-
ders and De 7''eC'l
tons, in all grades
and qualities and at
lowest prices at
Reinhart's. These
goods have just ar
rived and are the
latest patterns out
this season.
Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1889-12-24
The Latest,

A'-Have you heard the latestp
B>--No. Wh,tis it?
&--Did you hear what tho rain said
tn tho dust2
H;;--No, I did not,
The, rain ssia q the dust, II
GaVa the drop GA 5on; your nsme ia
uWaS"-1iAt..
Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1889-12-24
To the Public.

Mrs. F. s. Reeves, for ten years
most successful teacher in the Girls
High School, San Francisco, Califor-
MIA, will give instruction in all the
higher branches Of an English educa-
ton. Lessons in Elocution. Resi-
dence north rooms, a. J. Pullman's
building. t.
Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1889-12-24
Hides and Peltries.

] will pay the highest price in cash
for all kinds Of Purs, Deer Skins, Hides
and Sheep Pelts. Those having any
thing OF the kind to sell will do we'll
to give me call.
j. ALExArDER. (.
Elko, Dec. 20, 1889.
Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1889-12-24
aonsehold ssppiiea..

A. Bruce keeps constantly on hand
and will supply customers with fresh
bologna, Head Cheese, Sausage, Beef,
Pork and Mutton in any quantity,
and will deliver the same at your
door al reasonable prices, Families
will find it to their interest TO pat
ronize the Elko Butcher Wagon.
Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1889-12-24

Now and fancy styles of Wedding
Stationery just received at the INpE.
PEaDEr1 office. r.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10
Knew what He Wanted.

AT Napoleon, Ohio, before Judge
Potter and jury, a case was on trial,
and an outsider seated himself on one
of the puncheons at the far end of the
panel of jurors, there being no other
available seat. When the defendants
counsel arose to address the jury, he
scanned the face of each very closely,
and naturally his gaze was directed
to the farthest man from him, who
didn't happen to be juror at ALL
Glaring at him he began
Gentlemen of the jury, l want to
know what this man (referring to the
plaintiff in the case) has come into
court for? What is he seeking for ?
Again l repeat, gentlemen of the ju-
ry, why is he here ?"
The countryman imagined that the
question had direct reference to him.
self, and when the lawyer paused to
give due weight and emphasis to the
question, he jumped to his feet and
howled:
"What am here for, you cross-ey-
ed cock of the walk What am /
seeking for in this yere court? I'll
tell you in short order, you weazen-
faced old son of gun. I've been
here three days awaiting for my fees,
and nary red kin l git. Pay me
my witness fees, sir, and I'll git out of
here immejetly."
This unexpected Grafton brought
down the house, and the lawyer nev-
er finished his able argument.-Cin-
cinnati Enquirer.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

nection with the Kicker, the hay
was out for sign. We were tried,
convicted and fined $9-the greatest
outrage ever perpetrated in the name
of the law.
We shall bide our time. That is,
we shall begin next week and show
Squire Williams up as a drunkard,
dead-beat, absconder, embezzler and
perjurer, and if we can't drive him
out of the country in six weeks we
will forfeit lung. The man who
made the complaint did it to get even
with us for refusing to lend him our
only button-behind shirt. From this
out he is marked man. We will
begin on him next week, and we'll
bet ten to one that he hangs himself
inside of a month.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10
It was Suicide in Kentucky.

Andy Boiling was bad citizen Of
jackson county, and had killed hall
dozen of his fellow citizens. One
evening Boiling killed his seventh
man in Clover Bottom. The next
day coroner's jury was impaneled to
inquire into the affair. The testimo-
ny was that the deceased had called
Boiling "a - liar" and that Boil
ing Immediately drew his pistol and
fired, killing the man who had insult
ed him, at the first shot.
The jury went ont to deliberate,
and after short time returned the
following verdict:
1--WE find that the deceased, Henry
Jones, committed suicide"
The coroner was amazed. "I shall
not receive the verdict" he said. "The
testimony was positive that A. Boil
ing did the killing"
eyes," replied the foreman, "and
the testimony was equally positive
that the deceased was of sound mind,
and in full possession of all his facul-
ties just previous to his death, and
that, while in this condition, he call
ed Andy Boiling "a - liar 1t
stands reason that if he had not med
itated self-destruction he would not
have been so rash. He knew what the
consequences would be, and he evil
IDENTIFY wanted to die"
So the verdict of suicide stood
Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

As several versions of the incident
that occurred in our Office Saturday
night are flying around town and have
probably been telegraphed all over the
world, we deem it but right to give
the particulars as they occurred.
We were seated in the editorial
chair, writing a leader on the Euro
pean situation, when rough charact-
er known around town as mike the
Slayer" called in. AS we had never
had word with the man, we suspect
ed no evil. AS matter of fact we
reached for our subscription book,
supposing, of course, that he wanted
to subscribe for the best weekly in
America for year. The Slayer then
announced that he had come to slay
us, not because we had ever done him
harm but because the influence of the
press was driving out the good old
times and customs.
We retreated towards the door of
our harness department.
He pursued us with a drawn knife.
We then felt it our duty to draw
our gun and let six streaks of day
light through his body, and as he
went down we stepped TO the door and
sent a boy for the coroner. 1t was Il
clear case of selfdefense, and the in
quest was a mere formality. We la
ment the sad occurrence, but no one
can blame us. We paid his burial
expenses, and in another column will
be found his obituary, written in our
best vein and without regard to space
No other Arizona editor has ever done
half as much.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

The boys got after stranger the
other evening who was pointed out as
a horsc-thief, and ran him all over
town with the object of pulling him
up to limb. In some manner he
gave them the slip, and in their zeal
they got hold of Judge Duwney and
held him up to "a limb for over min
ute before the error WAS discovered.
The Judge is gu-gning around with a
sore throat and stiff neck and threat
ems to bring about fifty damage suits.
Take a friends advice, judge, and
hush up. You got off powerful easy,
considering your general character.
While it was u mistake, the boys
were not so far wrong either. We
wish such mistakes would occur often
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

While selling Mrs. Colonel Prescott
four pounds of prunes for half dol
lar the other day, Constable Button
entered and asked us to step across
the street to the Office of Esquire
Williams. We obeyed the request,
and we're at once served with war
rant charging us with keeping bales
of hay on the sidewalk in front of the
Kicker Office. to the detriment of pc
destrians. Asft is we'll known that
we run a grocery, feed store, harness
shop. bazar and music house in con-
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10
The Arizona Kie.,er.

We extract the following items from
the last issue of the Arizona Kicker
For the last six months Maj. Davis,
of this burgh, has lost no opportunity
Of abusing us and boasting of what
he would do if we did not step softly.
The reason for this conduct lies in the
fact that the Kicker not only called
him a horse-thief, but proved him a
biggamist besides. Last Saturday
the major, who has no more right to
that title than a mule has to that of
professor" borrowed a shotgun and
gave out that he had camped on our
trail and meant to riddle our system
with buckshot on sight. Word was
brought to us, and although we were
very busy at the time experimenting
our combined weekly newspaper, har.
ness shop, grocery, bazar, and gun
store, Gall combined under one roof,
and the largest retail establishment in
Arizona we laid aside our work and
went oyer to Snyder's saloon in quest
of the major. We found him, and
gave him such whipping as no man
in this town ever got before. He lies
a broken and stranded wreck on the
shores of time, so to speak, and the
doctor says it will be six weeks before
he will find any more trails or do any
more camping.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10
Consumption Surely Cured.

10 THE EDIToR-Please inform your
readers that l have positive remedy for
the above named disease. BY its timely
use thousands of hopeless cases have been
permanently cured. L shall be glad to send
two bottles of my remedy free to any Of
your readers who have consumption If
they will send me their express and post
Office address. Respectfully, Il. A. SLO-
CUM, NJ. c., 1Sl Pearl ST., New York.
S99yl
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

Omaha parent-Well, my son, how
are you getting on at college?
Omaha youth-Just splendidly. l
have only made one error in the last
three games of ball we have played.
-Ex. 4,
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

In company with the elite of this
neighborhood we were invited to the
abode of Judge Graham last Thurs
day evening, to witness the marriage
of County Clerk Dan Scott to the
beautiful Arabella johnson, only
daughter of the aristocratic widow
johnson, of Bay Horse Heights. The
widow had made spread worthy of
the days of Cleopatra, and Dan had
Oh new suit sent by express from
Omaha for the occasion. Everything
passed off pleasantly until s o'clock,
at which hour it was discovered that
the bride was missing, and investiga-
ton brought out the fact that she had
gone dead back on Dan and skipped
the tra-la, whatever that is, with a
bold cowboy named French Jim. She
left a message to the effect that she
never could love a man with cata-
ract in his left eye, and that meant
Dan. There was feast, but no we'd
ding, and Daniel will have to try it
again.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

Baby carriages are now made to
cost as high as 1878 each. This is
good for the carriage makers, but it
looks very much like a blow at our
infant industries.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

"What darned fools some of these
fellows who write for the press are"
said Mr.. Goshorn.
eyes, newspaper has to suit all
kinds of people," said Mr.. Jarpley.-
Elk.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

Why do vealy young men occupy the
front row of the parquet at the per-
formance of a burlesque? On the
principle of mutual attraction-there
are always calves in the ballet, don't
YOU see ?-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

Snooper-You call that a picked
choir, do you?
Choirister-Yes, why do you ask
1t strikes me that it was picked too
soon Time.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

Susie-Oh, mamma, I'll never dis
obey you again.
Mamma-Why, Susie, what have
you done?
Well, drank my milk at lunch,
and then ate-a pickle; and the milk
said to the pickle, "Get OUT" and the
pickle said, 81 WON'T" and they are
having an awful time Life.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

thought you told me you didn't
use tobacco.
| don't.
But you are putting cigar now.
Yes, but that is only 5-center.-
No tobacco in it.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

She-By the way, who is that lady
in white you have been so attentive to
this evening?
He-Attentive to You are mistak-
en- that's my wife.-Life.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

Bobby has been imparting to the
minister the important and cheerful
information that his father has got IA
new set of false teeth.
"Iudeed, Bobby" replied the min
lister indulgently, "and what will he do
with the old ones ?"
"Oh, l s'pose," replied Bobby, "they
will cut 'em down and make me wear
'em."-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

Mrs. Jones-Really, my dear, you
owe it to your friends to get new
dress suit.
Mr.. Jones-Well, if | do, | shall
have to owe it to my tailor.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

De Smith-Don't you think Miss
Travis is very cold and distant?
Popinjay-She ought to be; she
has gone to Toronto to spend the win
ter.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10
MICHIGAN CENTRAL
"The Niagara Falls Route"
Time Card in Effect

#Daily. Daily except Saturday. All other
trains daily except Sunday. Parlor cars on day
trains. Sleeping cars on night trains
j. WHITING, Ticket Agent.
O.W. RUGGLE5, G.. p. 81 r. Agt
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

Big sister shouting to Bobby
Bahbee you are wanted to do an er-
rand.
Bobby shouting back)-Tell moth
er / can't do it now. I'm busy.
It's not mother who wants you it's
father.
Bobby (hastily)-All right. Tell
him I'll be there in a minute.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10
WIT AND HUMOR.

WIT AND HUMOR.
A star girl-Meta Oric-Ex.
A slick girl-Sallie Vate.-Ex.
An oft mentioned girl--Helen
Blazes.-Ex.
The clay" of the last minstrel-his
grave.-Ex.
The richest gambler has seen "bet-
tor" days.-Ex.
Hobbs Interested in mind reading)
Don't you think some men have six
senses, my dear?
Mrs. Hobbs-No, nor five either.
-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-07-10

De Smith-Don't you think Miss
Travis is very cold and distant?
Popinjay-She ought to be; she
has gone to Toronto to spend the win
ter.-Ex.
Snooper-You call that picked
choir, do you?
Choirister-Yes, why do you ask
1t strikes me that it was picked too
soon Time.
Baby carriages are now made to
cost as high as 1878 each. This is
good for the carriage makers, but it
looks very much like blow at our
infant industries.-Ex.
she-By the way, who is that lady
in white you have been so attentive to
this evening?
He-Attentive to You are mistak-
en- that's my wife.-Life.
Mrs. Jones-Really, my dear, you
owe it to your friends to get new
dress suit.
Mr.. Jones-Well, if | do, | shall
have to owe it to my tailor.-Ex.
Omaha parent-Well, my son, how
are you getting on at college,?
Omaha youth-Just splendidly. |
have only made one error in the last
three games of ball we have played.
-Ex. (.
"What darned fools some of these
fellows who write for the press are"
said Mr.. Goshorn.
eyes, newspaper has to suit all
kinds of people," said Mr.. Jarpley.-
Elk.
Why do vealy young men occupy the
front row of the parquet at the per-
formance of a burlesque? On the
principle of mutual ttraction-there
are always calves in the ballet, don't
you see ?-Ex.
thought you told me you didn't
use tobacco.
| don't.
But you are putting cigar now.
Yes, but that is only 5-center-
No tobacco in it.-Ex.
Susie-Oh, mamma, I'll never dis
obey you again.
Mamma-Why, Susie, what have
you done?
Well, l drank my milk at lunch,
and then ate-a pickle; and the milk
said to the pickle, "Get out" and the
pickle said, 81 WON'T" and they are
having an awful time Life.
Big sister shouting to Bobby
Bahbeel you are wanted to do an err
rand.
Bobby shouting back Tell moth
er can't do it now. I'm busy.
It's not mother who wants you it's
father.
Bobby (hastily)-All right. Tell
him I'll be there in minute.
Bobby has been imparting to the
minister the important and cheerful
information that his father has got "a
new set of false teeth.
Tudeed, Bobby" replied the min
lister indulgently, "and what will he do
with the old ones ?"
"Oh, l s'pose," replied Bobby, "they
will cut 'em down and make me wear
em."-Ex.
Bessie-You refused Mr.. de Temps?
Why, any other girl would jump at
an offer from him
Maud just graduated 20, l know
he is handsome, but | never could
marry such an ignorant man. Why,
| asked him few questions about the
differentiation in protoplasmic molec-
ular bivalves, and do you know all
he said was, 81 suppose so."-Ex.
Lawyer-Now, Mr.. Costello, will
you have the goodness to answer me,
directly and categorically, few plain
questions ?
Mr.. Costello-Certainly, sir.
Now, Mr.. Costello, is there female
at present living with you who is
known in the neighborhood as Mrs
Costello?
There is.
Is she under your protection?
She is.
Now, on your oath, do you main
tain her ?
do.
Have you ever been married to herr
have not.
(Here several severe jurors scowled
gloomily at Mr.. Costello.)
That is all, Mr.. Costello, you may
90 down.
Opposing Counsel-Stop one mo-
ment, Mr.. Costello. Is the female in
question your grandmother?
| Che ,o-.Ev
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1889-07-25
Mechanrsbwn Frederick County, Maryland Thursday July 25 1885,

The manager departed, and few
moments later tall, swarthy young
man entered the bankers Office and was
coolly received.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1889-07-25
$elttt 4ottrp,
WHAT'S IN A NAME.

To farmer Cass was born son
Which caused exceeding joy.
Quoth he, "We'll name the urchin, John
He'll he an honest boy"
So John the little chap was called,
In cradle. street and class,
In all the town no brighter lad
Than little johnny Cass.
The father looked with filial pride
On this, his only son,
And thought no parent ever owned
A brighter, manl,cr one.
"lll guard with care his childish steps
Till tender youth shall pass,
Then in old age III fondly lean
On thy strong arm, John Cass."
An uncle of our prodigy
Glanced to drop in one summer,
A keen eyed man of business, he,
A bold Chicago drummer;
But when he heard the youngsters name
Cried he, II am astounded.
That you should give llm such name,
Nor notice how it sounded y
"Why," quoth the sire, inclined to ire,
II really cannot see"
"Just hold your head, says Uncle Ted,
"1ll tell you how twill he;
As long as people call Inn John
OF course the name might pass,
But when they come to call him Jack,
Twill simply bc Jack Cass."
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1889-07-25

KISS THE D-N Fool AND LET H1M
GO HoME.-The story goes that certain
society young man, noted for his hand
some bearing and winning voice, accom-
panied young lady to her home and,
as all true lovers do, fingered yet lit
tie while at the gate to have lovers
tete-a.tete with his fair companion.-
The night was beautiful, no one was
near to intrude, and above all he loved
her Why shouldn't she kiss him ?
With true maidenly modesty she re-
fused. He implored. She still withheld
from him that which would fill up his
cup Of happiness. The request was
repeated several times and so engrossed
did the young man become IN wooing,
he failed to notice the approach of the
parental step. The old gentleman had
been there himself and did not care to
intrude upon:the happiness Of the young
couple, so stepping behind a convenient
rose bush, he waited, thinking the young
man would soon leave. In this he was
mistaken. The lover tarried over the
request, until the patience OF the old
gentleman was exhausted. A voice the
couple we'll knew, aroused them from
their happiness, in tone OF impatient
anger, by saying: Daughter. kiss that
d--n fool and let him 60 home! !! 1t is
reported that the young man only
touched the ground in high places in
his endeavor to comply with the old
gentleman's command.-Ex.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1889-07-25
Church Directory.

Reformed Church-I2Gv. G. A, Whitmorc
pas or. Weekly Lectures Tuesday evening.
Meeting of Ladies' Aid Society every second
Wednesday evening Regular services by
appointment from the pulpit.
Lutheran Church-Rcv j. II. Barb, pas
tor, Services, Sunday 10 A. NJ. and $50 p.
NJ. Sunday School, 2. p. M. Prayer Meet
ing, Wednesday, GAS p. NJ.
Moravian Church, (Mcchanicstown) Rev.
r. w. Herbst Pastor. Preaching every Sun
day, alternating morning and evening"
Prayer Meeting every Friday evening sum
day School O'Clock, a. m.
Moravlan Church (Graccham) Rev. II. W.
Herbst Pastor.
Preaching every Sunday, alternating NOR
ming and evening.
Mite Society every Monday evening"
PRAYER Meeting every Wednesday evening.
United Brethren Church-Mitc Society
Second and Fourth Wednesday
Sunday School , r. NJ.
PRAYER Meeting every Thursday evening
Regular Services by appointment from the
pulpit.
Methodist Episcopal Church Rev. j..
N. Davis Pastor Services every alternate
Sunday at 10 \. NJ. Sunday School Q n. Nj.
Prayer Meeting every Thursday evening at :
r. NJ.
Unitcd Brethren Church-Rev G. j..
Rou,lab,lsl Pastor. Services every alternate
Sunday at 3 p. III. Sunday school every
Sunday at 2p. m. Prayer Meeting every
Thursday evening at y N.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1889-07-25

l am Henri Wintergreen, whom you
spurned! Avaunt!
Then the heroic young man went to
the depot, where Gertrude was waiting
for him, he having met her when he
came In on the train. The happy coup
lie went to the next town. were married,
and went on a tour to Europe, where
Henri was knlghted and given baron.
ial castle by a well.known and popular
king, to whom he taught the art of
pitching curved bill.
EPILOGUE.
Our story is nearly ended. Crushed
and mortified by the failure Of his afro.
cious Vaccinations, the banker lost his
reason, and is now confined in private
madhouse, where he persists in calling
the superintendent an umpire, and
amuses himself by loping around his
cell under the idea that he is making
home runs.
lie Is indeed pitiable object.
Jimalong led miserable life for a
few months when be was given situa.
ton as an umpire, and was lynched by
an infuriated populace.
Mr.. Bulletin, being unable to produce
the phenomenon at the next game was
sent to the Dry Tortugas, and is now
subsisting on roots and barks in those
melancholy wilds.
Thus we see, reader, that virtue is
always triumphant in the end.
The evil man may flourish for while.
but retribution will finally camp on
his neck and make him tlred.-Nebras.
ka State Journal.