New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1889-12-16

So sam Small is going TO become an Eplscopa;
Clergyman. Well, he will make a pretty good one,
but how he VIII surprise some Of lie pOrtly Old dicni
farlcs Of that Church who almost worship The cor
ventlonal, especially II he continues to initiate the
style of his friend sam Jones.
Bad Boy (gotting IN body blowl-There take that
Good Boy folding his arms with a sanity express
son)-No, Tommy, will not hit you back because l
promised mother that would never strike playmate
but (tckng him in the stomach how do you like thatf
-(Life.
An eminent Bostonian thinks that there Is some
thing wrong with the Gulf Stream. Thackelay once
told how that most excellent woman, Miss Josie
Mackenzie, in the habit Of writing ssterly letters
from Edinburgh in which she questioned the morality
OF Parks, waxworhs, and Towers of London.' y
similar questioning attitude may be found in Boston.
Illustrated by that other story told by somebody
Sidney Smith was 1t l-about old fellow who damned
tho North Pole. Oh that is nothing" said the great
sidney to Mortified liscrer he has even been Known
to sreak disrespectfully Of the Equator
1t Is fact that within year lady Of fashion
has engaged as maid a prep0ssesslnR young w0ma'i
of excellent education and envtable acquirements
whose grandfather employed her grandfather as , h,
her maid does.-(New-Orleans Picayunc
"The Pail Mall Gazette" has stupid would
humorous article on the collars Of great men, with
some illustrations that appear to have been cut out
with a meataxe. And doubt It's contemporaries
will at once say that The Gazette is becoming
AmcrlcanlZeu.
our faults aud falngs and then go about as sort OF
sandwich men advertising this country.
Who're 1t Would Be Boon..Quevedo-l tel you
capital punishment is relic OF barbarism, ana ought
TO be abolished in a progressive ana ehiisnteheo
country like this.
Curtis-It ought, eh ;. ,.
to he done away with entirely.
Curtis land there seely glitter In his eye and
cold raspns tone to his yoceoDd you ever o Sit
digging his elbows into your ribs every ume no
imagined he heard something funny on the stage :
and ouevedo bowed HIS head in siencel-(phla-
delphia Inquirer
"The Catholic Review" doesn't appear TO be satisfied
with Catholic literature in this country. We sigh
It says, for a glimpse of novel, biography, a
history-anythlng written by Catholic American with
literary SKILL taste and md esty. But we sigh in
vain French TRANSACTIONS. German TRANSACTIONS. Eng
lish poppy prose- sermons dun and meditations awful
continue to pour from the Catholic presses In long
drawn-out agony"
A veteran of the late war died not long ago from
the effects of his army experience. leaving Two
children one OF them a boy IN his infancy. This
little fellow the other day wanted TO play prayer
and Opened IN '9 Seay y@s that % right
said his sister. Yes II s' persisted the young
pracr any rate tha' wh3 thS Sgd SAY bl IN sunday Sy
fused idea in his mind 10 the father who fought on
earth and the "Fa,Lcr which art In leaven"-lBostoh
Transcript
is "The Christmas Judge which has Just been issued
No expense has been spared by tlc enteIprsng pub
fishers TO make this the best number Of tho year.
II is full of fresh jokes, bright daogues, humorous
Stories and catching poetry on tho topics OF the day.
Tbe Illustrations are in keeping with the high repua-
| lion OF "Judgeo As supplement- to this number
there is given handsomely execute copy Of SPIRITED
picture entitled, bringing Up th2 Guns painted
EXPRESSLY for The Christmas judge by Gilbert Gau'
4 girl in Smith County, Kansas, won 900 by
! buskinr and crbbing sixty bushels of corn In hys
h"urs 4 man In an adjoining county got six mont s
| Hoard and lodging at the cOultys expense Dy GRIP
! bInes omly one blshel Another man husked II.
| i Norrstown Herald.
Constantly the English language Is becoming en-
r,ched nv new words the Woman's Temperance Pub
llcat,on Society Of Chicago is advertising "eeganr
! booklets In Autograph uh'S'
INDIGNANT Physlclan.-Man, what have you done
! You sent NV patient the wrong prescription aud II
killed him. .. -, ,,.,o. ,, .o,, ,os.
I'll, n', vo,r oider paent der right prescription
and dot killed him How can somebody please sooch
n man NJ Sprln gGeld Republican