davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1889-10-12

A CHALLENGE.-The proprietors of DR..
Bulls Cough Syrup hereby challenge the
Faculty to prescribe remedy more effec-
tive than theirs.
l cordially recommend Salvation OIL to
all suffering with rheumatism.
Jos. 8. Fox, Cattle Dealer,
III North Broadway, Baltimore, Md.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1889-10-12
Their Name Is Dennis.

Their Name Is Dennis.
oh, II was a gay deceiver
And a mighty gall he had.
He approached our thrifty merchants
And solicited their "ad."
The Chicago NepS he came FROM
That's the story that he told,
But he was merry schemer
And a gallant sharper bold.
The Chicago Nens Is mighty,
And the merchants that he hit
Were delighted with the prospect
And most beautifully bit,
They considered II an object
To set forth their business Views
In the advertising pages
OF the great Chicago Nens.
But alas for advertisers!
And alas for wasted tin!
And alas for all the sheckels
That the schemer gathered In!
1t was not the mighty daily
These lads" was going to use;
1t was just little paper
That Is called the Sunday Ne,oS.
So these merchants are disguised
And are wishing that they had
All the pretty little buckets
They lad paid him for their "ad.'
And they think It Is maxim
There Ia little room to doubt
That its's best, In advertising,
Just to "lOOk leedle oudt,"
Now If lads" In mighty papers
Are what merchants want TO get,
What's the matter with the Daily Ne,o
Right here In Joliet9
You are certain 1t Is published
Just exactly as you're told,
And you get just what you pay for
And you know you don't get sold.
Smiley, in Joliet Ne,os.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1889-10-12
(Oct. 81

FINAL SETTLEMENTS ESTATE OF
ELLA J. HoRNIcK, DECRAsED.-Notce Is hereby
given to all persons interested In said estate that the
Undersigned administrator the estate Of said Ella
HOrnick deceased viii appear before the Probate Court
Of the county Of La Sale ami state of Illinois at the
County Court House, in Ottawa, In said county, on
Monday, the 2st day OF October 1882 for the pur
pose OF rendering account OF his proceedings In tho
administration Of said estate for the final settlement
Dated at Ottawa this 18th day OF September 1880
RICHARD j. HORNICK.
Administrator.
Attest HENRY HRLMIa.
Clerk Probate Court, La Sale Co., H. septlSw
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1889-10-12
The we.struck audience gazed


On the figure, gaunt and gray
Twas the murdered king, or the ghost of
him,
And Hamlet was the play.
His hour was brief, he said,
He must go ere light Of day,
TO the place of torment prepared for him,
Till his sins were purged away.
Yes, purged was the word he used,
And though what a remedy rare
Would Pierce's Purgative Pellets prove.
In his case, then and there.
DR.. Pierce's Pleasant Purgatlve Pellets
have no equal az cathartic In derange-
ments Of the liver, stomach and bowels
Small, pleasant In action, and purely vege-
table.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1889-10-12

The statement that Mr.. Breed, of Lynn,
received a vote In the Massachusetts Re-
publican Convention recalls the anecdote
told years ago of an ambitious Pennsylva-
MAN named Green, who was candidate Tor
office. He received one vote. His morti'
tication was intense, and to make 1t more
bitter his neighbors all insisted upon wor-
rying him by pretending to suspect that he
cast that himself. This annoyed him SO
that he offered a suit of clothes, worth not
less than $50, to the citizen who would
come forward and prove that he was the
voter whose lone ballot was east for Green.
A Dutchmau responded to the appeal, fur
nished satisfactory proof that he was the
man, and claimed the reward. How did
II happen?" asked Mr.. Green "that you
voted for me-" The Dutchman hesitat-
ed and dlsliked TO answer. Being pressed,
he said: "Ef told yon don't 60 back on
der close ," Oh, no; you shall have them
sure" Veil, den, dells you; l make a
mistake In de teeket"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1889-10-12
Ruck,,n,s Arnica Salve,

The best salve in the world for cuts, bruises,
sores, ulcers, salt rheum, fever sores, letter
chapped hands, chilhlains, corns, and all SKIN
eruptions, and positively cures piles, or 70 pay
required. 1t is guaranteed to give perfect sat
isfaction. or money refunded. Price 70 cents
per box, For sale by D. Lorriaux.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1889-10-12
whats female beauty, but an air divine,
Through which the minds all. gentler

graCes shine"
This may be good logic In poetry but In
real life the minds all-gentler graces
shine" to better advantage when enclosed
In sound physique. DR.. Pierce's Favor.
lite Prescription Is positive cure for the
most complicated and obstinate cases of
leucorrhea, excessive flowing, painful men.
situation, unnatural suppressions, prolap-
sus, falling of the womb, weak back,
female weakness" anteversion retriever
sion, bearing down senations, chronic con-
gestion, Inflammation and liberation of the
womb, Inflammation, pain ard tenderness
in ovarles, accompanied with internal
heat"
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1889-10-12
M. N. ARMSTRONG.
ATTORNEY at Ldr

ESTATE OF CAsPAR LANG, DKcKAsEp-Nouee u
Il hereby given that the undersigned, adminisuatrx
of the estate Of Caspar Lang late of the county Of II
sale ami State of Insis deceased will appear before
the Probate Court Of said county the third Monday.
(beng the 18th day. Of November 1889 at the Prooe
where ali persons having claims or demands against
said estate are notified to attend and present the came
in writing for adjustment -
Dated this I'd day Of October. A. D. iSSs.
CAROLINE LANG.
ADMINISTRATIVE.
(Oct 5.1
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1889-10-12

Colonel Olcott, now preaching his theos.
optical creed In England gave hts expla-
tion of the ultimate state: "The spiri,
is sexless. Sex is the result Of the fall
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1889-10-12

Entered at the Post 0tnce at Ottd,Oa. Illinois, "a
Second Class Mai Matter.
The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1889-10-12

WHEN in a grocer's store y9g .t1nd
And cakes of IVORY Soar demand,
Be careful not to be mislcd
And limitations take instead,
For dealers oft will praises sing
OF that which may more profit bring.
Let not your senses clouded be
Because snowy cake you see.
For villainy is not confined
To darkest colors, bear in mind,
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16
Mules Train as Well as Horse.

II had as lief have mule as a horse,
if he is only intelligent" said an old cir
Gus horse trainer. when 1 select q
horse or a mule see that he has clear
cnt head and neck; he must be broad
between the eyes and full above them.
and broad between the ears. The ears
should be of good shape and stand we'll
up. These are indications of large
brain and intelligence. The ears ought
to set pretty we'll forward. The animal
should also have large, full eye, with
q mild expression. The first thing do
after selecting the horses is to get them
accustomed to the whip.
This is done by placing q halter or
bride upon them and then fourishing
and cracking the whip, first lightly, but
with increasing sharpness, until l can
run all around the horse and crack the
whip as loudly as I please without
causing the animal any fear. He will
then stand perfectly still. The next
step is to teach them their names and
how to stand in the class. You may
wonder how this is done.
when the horses are standing in a
row I call one of them by his new name.
I stand short distance away and cause
him to come to me by a slight tap from
the whip. When he comes caress and
feed him SO as to let him know that he
has pleased me. generally give him
q little sugar also. In four or five days
q horse will stand in class with the
others without bride and will know
what his name is called After they
have gone thus far with their education
they are ready for special training
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

Capt. Traylor stood at the head Of his
company, the dead man at his feet. He
heard the battle on the right-the rat
tie and crash of musketry, the ceaseless
thunder of cannon, the desultory cheers
of the invisible combatants. He marked
the ascending clouds of smoke from
the distant forests. He noticed the
sinister silence of the forest in front.
These contrasting extremes affected the
whole range of his sensibilities. The
strain upon his nervous organization
was insupportable. He grew hot and
cold by turns. He painted like dog,
and then forgot to breathe until APP
praised by vertigo. These symptoms of
excitement he interpreted as cowardice,
and was filled with apprehensions of
disgrace. Il shall break down! I
shall dreak down. Over and over the
words repeated themselves with me-
chanical iteration. He thought he spoke
them audibly - believed that he
screamed them SO that all could hear.
Suddenly he became calm. He had
glanced downward at his naked sword
and-God knows how-it had reminded
him of an ancient Roman antidote to
military dishonor. He grssped the hilt
in both hands, set the point against his
breast and bent his arms with all their
stength, thrrsting the keen blade
through his body till it came out at the
back; then falling heavily forward upon
the dead man, he died.
A week later the Major General COM
handing the left cOrDs of the Federal
army submitted the following official
report:
SIR have the honor to report. with re-
gard to the action of the 18th inst, that ow-
ing TO the enemy's withdrawal from my
front to reinforce his beaten left, my COM
mand was not seriously engaged. Ny loss
was as follows: Killed, l officer; man."
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

c. S. Bushnell in the New Haven
Palladium: Mr.. Ericsson, soon after
our acquaintance. let me take the Mont
tor plans. He had vowed that he would
never go to Washington with the plans
because the Government owed him
81, 900 for his engineering work in con-
structing the propeller Princeton, the
first propeller ever built, but would not
pay it. took the plans to Mr.. Wells,
Secretary of the Navy, and also to Mr..
Seward, Secretary of State. Mr.
Seward gave me a note to President
Lincoln, and the following day called
on the President. He said he did not
know much about vessels, save fiat
boats, but he agreed to meet me the
next day with the Board of Naval Com
missioners. Well, at this meeting Presi-
dent Lincoln heard great deal of
adverse criticism on the part of the
naval officers. but he said that the idea
reminded him of the expression of the
girl who, when she put her foot in her
stocking, said: There's something in
it. Then I requested the board to
make a favorable report, that there
might be vessel constructed from the
plans. Two were in favor and one was
opposed, and could not persuade him
to consent. I was rather discouraged,
and saw but one way to secure adop.
ton of the Elan, and that was to bring
Ericsson before the board. I left Wash
ington for New York that night. 1 saw
Ericsson the next morning, and, by the
way, was admitted by servant girl,
Ann, who has been in Mr.. EricssonA
service from that time until the present.
1 succeeded in persuading him to break
his vow and return with me to Wash
ington, telling him that all that I be.
ieved was in the way of the acceptance
of the plan was the fact that one of the
members of the board did not think that
he understood the idea we'll enough to
give it his appreciation. So Mr.. Erics-
son returned with me, and under the
influence of the mans enthusiasm and
eloquence the board became convinced
of the feasibility of the project and gave
it hearty approval Thus approved the
plan was carried out and the Monitor
was built.
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

'.The peerless empire of form and color,
Is found IN Colorado" says great artist.
SO are many other very wonderful effects.
There is that grand triumph of engineering
skill the Bow Knot Loop. famed all over the
world; the pretty town of Graymont nestled
against the base of Gray's Peak. the giant
prince of the range: sunrise on Gray's Peak
"a sight once witnessed never to be forgot
ten: Idaho Springs the beautiful, restful
spot blessed with the healing waters for all
who come. within two hours ride of young
leviathan Denver: the storied gold camp of
Georgetown. perched in the upper AIR of the
mountains ever fresh and cool and clear
these are few of the delightful spots in the
american Alps" reached by the Colorado
Central Division of the Union Pacific Rail
way IN Colorado.
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16
The Two Suits Of Feudal Steel ArmOr at
AbbOtSfOrtl.

The one was designed for a French
knight, one of the gendarmes of the
Middle Ages. He must have been a
man considerably under the middle size,
and the suit of armor exhibits one pecu-
liarity which will be interesting to
students of the learned DR.. Meyrick.
The shield, which is very rarely the
companion of the suit of armor, is not
only present in this case, but secured
in an unusual manner by nails with
large screw heads. instead of being
hung round the neck, as was common
during "a career" the hands being thus
left free, the right to manage the lance,
the left to hold the horses bride. To
complete this suit of armor lance is
placed in one hand exactly after the
measure of one in DR.. Meyrick's collec-
ton. In the other hand is a drawn
sword; which is carved over with writ
ing, and contrived SO as to keep record
of the days of the Catholic saints. In q
word, it is calendar to direct the good
knights devotions. The other suit of
armor, which is also complete in all its
parts, was said when it came into my
possession to have belonged to knight
that took arms upon Richmond's side at
the field of Bosworth, and died, think,
of his wounds there. If one were dis
posed to give him a name, the size of
his armor might suggest that he was
Sir John Cheney, the biggest man of
both armies on that memorable day. I
venture to think-for 1 feel myself Gid
ing into the prosy style of an antiquar-
ian, disposed, in sailor phrase, to spin
tough yarn-I venture to think that the
calendar placed in the hand of the little
French knight originally belonged to
the gigantic warrior of Bosworth Field.
l imagine it was Withdrawn for the pur-
pose of supplying its place with a noble
specimen of the sword of the Swiss
mountaineers-a sword nearly six feet
in length, and welded with both hands.
This we must consider as the glddius
militis leUis dI'mat,tr6e, or the sword
of the ight-armed soldier. 1: was with
such weapons that men in old times
fought at barriers, or passes in the nat
ural straits of a mountainous country,
or upon the beach of defended castle.
They are found mentioned in the wars
of Switzerland and in the feuds of the
Scottish clans. The Scottish poet Bar
bour gives most interesting account
of the successful defence made by his
hero against the vassals of John of
Lorne, three of whom, armed with these
dreadful weapons, attacked the mon
arch at once after the rout of Darby, and
were all slain by him.-From a hith-
erto unpublished fragment by Sir
Walter Scott, IN Ha,pers Magazine.
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16
How to Use a Cane Of|ensiyely,

The way to use your cane," said a
noted foreigner the other day, is not
to strike with it as if it were a club.
That is of SO little use that it is doubt
full if it would not be wrenched away
from you the first blow you tried to
strike. You can make a cane the most
ugly and vicious of weapons by simply
punching with it. You hold the handle
in your right hand and use your left
hand merely to guide the point. Then
jab with it at your assailants stomach,
neck. or face, according IS you want to
hurt him. He cannot get the cane
away from you and cannot get within
arms reach of you"
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16
Your Life in DANCE.

Take time by the forelock ere that rasp-
ing cough of yours carries you where SO
many COnsumptives have preceded you: lose
no time. but procure a bottle of the nation
al remedy for Lung and Bronchial Diseases.
SCOTS Emulsion of Cod Lirer Oil with Hy-
pophosphites. 1t will cure you. Sold by all
Druggists.
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

"Speakin' of twins" SAID the old man
Chumpkins, there was two boys raised in
our neighborhood that looked Just alike till
their dyin day. Lem didn't have any teeth
and his brother Dave did, but they looked
precisely alike all the same. The only way
you could tell them apart was to put your
finger in LENS mouth, and if he bit Yer
twas Dave"
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

Doctor-I4ee Just what's the matter
with You. You need something
Strengthening. Eat plate of oat meal,
boiled. every morning for breakfast.
Patient-I do, doctor.
Doctor equal to the occasion) Then
leave it off.-Hankee Blade,
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16
Better Than Oklahoma.

LOO acres of the choicest land in the San
Luis Valley, in Southern Colorado. all under
fence, water-rights secured and bitches
ready for use. 1t will be sold as whole or
in quantities to suit the purchaser. 1t Is the
finest land in the valley, and is adapted to
either farming or stock-raislng. For Price,
terms, etc., address HENRY A. BUFFERS,
AlamOsa, Colorado.
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16
A LUCKY HIT.

st. Louis (MO.) Star-Sayings, March y.
Last Monday morning, Paymaster Ran
dolph of the st. Louis and San Francisco
railroad, called at the Continental Bank and
collected $4,000, one-twentieth of the cap
ital prize in the last drawing of the Louis
lana State Lottery. The number of the tick
ct was 1881. A couple of weeks before the
drawing came off, the employees of the
Frisco road Clipped in 10 cents each and
purchased the One-twentieth ticket which
drew the capital prize. 100000. The lucky
ones were A. d. Masters, chief dispatcher;
]. l.. ToOmey, Mark Waters. George Wher-
~ and Robert Gregg, freight conductors;
W. ID. Reyes, a dispatcher; Dan Mahoney
and J. B. Sheldon, brakemen; J. Z. Eddy,
foreman of the roundhOuse, and A. Veach,
division superintendent. Mr.. Randolph says
the boys were very glad last Monday when
he gave them each 81 800. ''Most of the boys
are married and the money came in handy.
There are few of them talking of joining a
building association of some kind too. They
may try the same scheme this next drawing,
for there is some talk to that effect"
''What man has done, man can do" is an
cd saying. MOdernized it it reads, ''What
man has due man can dun," though he
can't always get it.
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16
IS 1T GENUINE?

Probably thousands Of people in this
section OF country, and this section is
no exception to any other in this re-
spect in the United States, have read
the report said to have been written by
Prof. S. A. baltimore, Phi. D., LID,
Analyst Of Foods and Medicines, New
Yo State Board Of Health and Pro-
lessor of Chemistry in the Rochester,
n. Y, University, stating that all of the
Safe Remedies manufactured by II. H.
Warner & Co., were pure and whole
some, nor did any of them contain any
mercury or deleterious substance. To
shorten the controversy, however, We
will give Prof. Lattimore's report entire.
UNIVERSITY OF ROCHESTER,
CHEMICAL LABORATORY.
Mr.. H. H. Warner has placed in my
possession the formula of the several
medicines manufactured and sold under
the general designation of "Warner's
Safe Remedies" I have investigated
the processes Of manufacture which are
conducted with extreme care and ac-
cording to the best methods. 1 have
taken from the Laboratory samples of
all the articles used IN the preparation
OF these medicines, as well as the sever
al medicines in which they enter. T.
have also purchased from different drug
gists in this city warmers Safe Rene
dies" and upon critical examination I
FIND THEM ALL ENTIRELY FREE FROM
MERCURY AND FROM POISONOUS AND DEL
ETERIOUS SUBSTANCES.
S. A. baltimore, Phi. d.. LII. d.,
Analyst of Foods and Medicines, New
York State Board of Health, Profess
or of Chemistry, University of Roch-
lister, n. Y.
We cannot think that a firm of the
standing of H. H. Warner & Co. would
dare publish such statement if it we're
untrue, and we now have that firms
authority to say to our readers that it
is absolutely and unqualifedly true in
every particular.
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

Omaha chief: 'And when the shooting
Proud policeman: 'Yes." d. c. Ibid
you not know you would be called coward
all your life?'' 2. p: Il made hasty
calculation to that effect, but / thought
would rather be a coward all my life than a
corpse for fifteen minutes.
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

Oh! - who teach the ingenious youth of
our great and growing nation, let them
learn the noble art of self-defense, as Sal
vation Oil is the specific for hurts.
Two charming little girls were dancing
1.-THE racket" in the streets. ''What makes
you so happy" a gentleman asked. ''Oh!
our mas have thrown away all our horrid
medicine, and we have only TO take DR..
Bulls Cough Syrup, and that amt bad at
ALL"
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

At our Washingtonian tableaux. Little
Henry: Il don't believe this shows goin'
to 60" Little Edith: .'Why not?" Little
Henry: Il just heard George Washington
tell General Gates he didn't have a cigar.
and saw two sticking out of his vest pock,
ct"
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

THOSE biscuits would kill mule.
growled Squildig. ss he surveyed a pile
Of those edibles Of his wifeis oonstrue-
ton. Il think not. dear she replied.
sUestly. sTy them and See
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

Mr.. A.: 81 must compliment you: you
have charming wife," Dentist: Have
you seen her teeth? Bertha, show him your
teeth. / finished them only yesterday"
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

Meddler: .'What is your business:,
Cynicus: Winding it, Meddler: mind
ing what!" CynictIs: My business
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

The King of Urawandi has three wives
whom he pounds numerically when he gets
drunk. His course is approved by Hoyle. We
believe. A king full always beats three
queens.
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

WIN. HAMScoN, Oshkosh. Wis, who
was for seven years SO afflicted with piles
that he was unable to attend to business. is
entirely cured by the use of Coles Carboli-
saive. Price % and 80 cents, at druggists.
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

Clara: "How comfortable pants must be.
Wish was man." Her mother: my
dear, you shock Inc. You should say trous-
ers." Clara: 81 don't care. Charlie al
ways says pants" Mother: "You forget
that Charlie works in clothing store"
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

Ii afflicted with sore eyes, Use Dr. Isaac
ThOmpsOn's Eye Water. Druggists sell it. 25c
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

Did you ever notice that nature observes
the rules of proportion in making the hu-
man features? When it gives man an un-
usual allotment of cheek it also gives him an
unusual quantity of chin
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

4 juvenile base ball club in this city is
called the Units. The urchins that christ
ened it probably did not stop to consider tina.
1t Will take twenty of them to make one
score.
Dodge City times. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1876-1892, 1889-05-16

Yes, the bard is right: life is like mighty
river. And the man with the most craft
gets the biggest cargo.