davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1889-11-07
Books and Stationery at
+. E. WARREN's.
BROOKS PLUMBER ,ST0BE


BROOKS PLUMBER .STOBE
We offer to the buying public
A STOCK of SIX THOUSAND
DOLLARS, consisting of
Dry oods,Boots,Shoes
Hats, Gaps, Gloves,
Mitten6 g. Notions
of all kinds and in endless variety
at WHOLESALE PRICES for
Sixty Days. This we do ''Just to
get our hand in" to advertise our
firm, and at the same time we pro-
pose to EXPOSE THE OUTRA-
GEOUS PROFITS heretofore
charged for the same class of goods
in Worthington that we are selling
To the winds with profits, for 60
days we will pay our own expenses,
sell goods at cost, below cost, even
at half price to get the big end of
the trade. Human life is too
short to be wasted in the ordinary
method of working up" a trade.
Low PRICES
is bound to win and we propose to
do business from the start. We
have no
LEADERS TO CATCH
customers. But have cut prices
all along the line. Everything is
cheap. You are paying too much
for goods. Worthington has the
reputation of being the dearest
market to buy in, Of any in a civil
lized country. We propose to
change this. Cur motto is,
CASH
and Competition. Bring your cash
and we will give you practical H.
lustration of
RED HOT
competition. This is YOUR
BENEFIT, take advantage of it.
Our stock is we'll selected, the
quality is first class, and every
thing ridiculously low in prices.
Having no old accounts to COL
lect you need not pay cash to make
good the losses for those who can
not or will not pay. : Remember
there is no friendship
in business" It is low prices
and money that talks. Our COM
petitors are Eat their wits end" and
will have to follow our lead in the
reduction of prices. But as we
don't care for profits we shall
still undersell them and save from
Is to so per cent on your purchases
Buy of us. Yours for Business.
BROOKS & CO.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1889-11-07

ORDERS RECEIVE PROMPT ATTENTION.
Ice cream, milksl,ake and all sum
ner drinks, ciga.s. conftctioue,y, etc.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1889-11-07

Jamestown dress goods at Is cents
per yard at H. E. ToRRANcE's. q
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1889-11-07

Call and examine our stock Of oak
cherry and walnut.
NAMAKAGoN I4Us1rEn Co.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
FASHIONS FOR MEN.

The strict rules of outing attire pre-
clude the wearing of the sash with a
starched shirt.
The size of the scarfs will be in nowise
diminished. The huge puff scarfs will
be more popular than in the early spring.
The signs wouii indicate that the dark
backgrounds in scaring will predomi-
nate to a greater extent than last season.
The extra wide Ascot will enjoy the
popularity presaged by the success it has
had this season in the light weight tex
lures.
The wearing of suspenders when the
sash is assumed is tabooed as illustrating
a lack of confidence verging on the
humoresque.
Waist belts are sometimes worn under
the sashes to give an additional assur-
ance and to secures looser and less bind
ing effect Of the sash.
The line of the fall styles of neckweal
viii be generally quieter, so far as color
and pattern is concerned, than the scarf
ings at present the vogue.
The Windsor tie, either tied in but
teray bow or folded without being press
ed aud tied in crayat form loosely, is th'
particularly "propah capah' with I
neglige shirt
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
The rnstantaneous Photoerapher.

He's the sort of person rate as an embryonic
pirate, as he ever seems TO gyrate
From the mountains to the sea;
He's the bane of timid lovers, for days he near
them hovers, till their presence he discovers.
Then he laughs in ghoulish glee
For he thinks it very funny watching them ex.
tracing honey lip from lip, and ere they're
done he
Snaps the shutter on the pair;
This the object Of his ruse is, and the kiss he re
produces, although 1t no earthly use is,
AS he doubtless Is aware.
And you never can evade him; 10 reform, you
can't persuade him. till In the grave they've
laid him,
Underneath the willow trees;
But youth find him with his small ways, on the
street or in the Railways. like a kleptonaniac,
always
Taking everything he sees.
If you threaten TO expose him you are foolish, for
It shows him you're afraid of him, which throws
him
Into fits of scornful laughter;
Thus his shamelessness he shows, you're quick 10
realize he knows you're bound TO silence, for ex
posure
Is the very thing he's after
Though il may be long delayed, he win some time
meet the lady he viii love, but I'm afraid he
Win have reason TO be sad
If she feels toward him as did when as neighbori
we resided he'll receive the most decided
Negative he ever had.
IF. H. curtiss in New York Sun.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
A Knock out Blow.

Just above the hotel there is a bootblack's
stand presided over by an italian. On tho
first day Of his arrival, a month ago, Penn
sylvanian took the chair for a shine and in
paying his dime and making change there
was some mistake and dispute as to five
cents.
II no helpa-no helpal" protested the Ital-
ian, with many shrug.
"Do you mean to swindle me out Of that
nickelf
81 no helpaln
"Hand over that nickel or l win take an
awful revengel"
"No helpa-no helpa."
The man had three friends at the hotel Be
told them the story and they started up town
together
'See here old Italy, let's figure a bit, -
said the spokesman rs they halted at tho
stand Here are four Of us That's an
| average of at least five shines a day for tho
forty days we shall be here. Two hundred
shines at ten cents apiece figures up just SO
You beat US out of a nickel and lost saw
buck How much are you aheadp
And the Italian stood there with his mouth
open and his hair crawling up on end, and
all he could say was;
"Wheefl Dat was one hossa on me, chr
Detroit Free Press.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
MoNKEYINa wIrH A eAaooN.
A Hard slugger of st. Louis Gets Knocked
Ont i'm One Round.


In the old ST. Louis museum we had, among
other attractions, a baboon called Dick. He
was a solid chunk Of fellow, good tempered,
and a great favorite. He had one pecul
iarity, though, which we had to cater to. He
took short maps twice day, and if aroused
before his time he was as ugly as sin all the
rest of the day. We had him dressed up as
little boy, and when the time came to take
his naphe crept into an old fashioned cradle,
and the fat woman generally rocked him to
sleep. That very thing was quite a draw,
and plenty of people came in solely TO see the
baboon rocked Off to slumber.
One day, soon after Dick had closed his
eyes, a half drunken chap entered the place
and created considerable disturbance. lie
went by the name of Awful Pete, and was q
hard slugger. tried to reason with him and
get him out, but he unfortunately caught
sight of the sleeping baboon and at once de-
manded that the animal be aroused and put
through his tricks. | sought to explain, but
be wouldn't have it, saying;
81 paid to see the bab, and I'm going TO SEQ
him or bust the b'ilerp'
"But If you wake him up he'll fight"
"Then I'll wiring his neck"
Before could stop him he lodged under
the rope and lifted Dick out of the cradle
Tho animal woke upand took in the situation
in about the tenth part of second, and then
he fastened his hands into Petes hair, got a
grip with his teeth on the siugger's nose, and
we had museum, menagerie and circus com.
bined for the next five minutes Pete roared,
and wooped, and pranced around in pain and
terror, and the bab pulled handfuls of hair
from his head, and bit aud scratched like a
wildcat. When we finally got him off that
suooer was n sipht to n .n,,it a,,d had 10 lac
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
:. Errrurs or nronERN LIrr.

Eminent authorities unanimously agree
that the high pressure methods Of modern
lie are rapidly making us a race Of helpless
mvalids-subect 10 all manners Of nervous
affections, headache, insanity, dizziness nell
ralpia, baclSache, hyste ia, nervous trouble
Of the heart, stomach, kidneys, pain etc
Ladies aud gentleman who are thus afflicted
or who are compelled TO keep late hours do
much mental or physical work, who worry
or fret about business or domestic troubles,
should remember that no other remedy in
the world will so speedily cure these DIS
eases, remove worry and the blues, induce
tranquil sleep, relieve pain, or build up the
BRAN and nervous systems, as DE-. Miles
great discovery, the Restorative Nervine
lt contains no opium or morphine. Trial
bottles free at Biery n Thomas's drugstore.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

AT the risk Of provoking a smile at our
simplicity, we will relate that long years ago
when we thought that great men, if they
speak at all, always speak words of wisdom
we followed Tennyson, who was accompanied
by lady and two children, about the South
Kensington museum for two hours and a
half, hoping that he would speak. At last
he made signs as if he were about to do so.
Hoping to hear some criticism of painting
we listened intently, and these memorable
words fell from the lips of England's poet
laureate: "You take care of the children
while go and get some beer. n-Dr. j. NJ
Buckley in Christian Advocate.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
He Could AGord It.

Mrs. Youngwife- John, dear want a new
dress.
Mr.. Younghusband-I can't afford it at
present, my dear I've got to get new suit
for myself,
Mrs Y.-You're mean thing, so therei
You get a new suit for yourself, but none for
me.
Mr. Y Il can't afford both at once and my
business requires that | should dress well,
and
Mrs. Yves, you dress well There's Mr..
Jones, our neighbor; you dress much better
than he does and he's In business, too.
Mr.. Y.-Ahl my dear, but he's rich man
and can afford to goshabby Boston Courier.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

The transition from long, lingering and pain
lpl sickness 10 robust health marks an epoch in
the life OF the Individual. Such a remarkable
event Is treasured in the memory and agency
whereby The good health has been attained Is
gratefully bcssed Hence il is that so much is
heard In pruse of EletrIc Bitters. So many feel
shey owe their restoration TO health to the iise of
the Great Alternative and Tonic. If you are
tloubled with any disease Of Kidneys, Liver or
stomach. OF long on short standing you will sure
" find relief by use Of Electric Bitters Sold at
Soc aud 81 per bottle at REBER'S Drugstore.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
100 Ladies wanted.

And 100 men to call at druggists, for
free package of Lanes Family Medicine.
the great root and herb remedy, discovered
by DIR Slas Lane while in the Rocky noun
tanins. For diseases of the blood, liver and
kidneys it is positive cure. For constipa-
tionand clearing up the complexion it does
wonders. Children like it, Everyone
praises it. Large-size package, so cents.
At ali druggists
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
"A GooD APPETITE

Is essential to good health; but at this sea-
SON il is ohenlost, owing to the poverty or
inpurity of the blood, arrangements Of the
digestive organs aud the weakening effect
of the changing season, Hoods Sagsaparilla
rs a wonderful medicine for creating am ap-
petite, toning the digestion, and giving
strength TO the whole system. Now is the
time to take il. BE sure to get Hoods
sarsaparilu.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
The pangers of oonspiouousness.
Quickly sileneed.

First Old Lady-Conductor raise this win
dow; l shall smother to deathl
Second Ditto-Conductor, lower this win
dow, or I'll freeze to deathl
First o. L. (agaim-Conductor will you
raise
Irate Passenger dnterrupting)- Conductor,
hoist that window and freeze one of those
old women to death; then lower it and
smother the other onel
Silence in the car Washington Capital
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
ron rHE coon or 0THERs.

! want to make known the fact that |
suffered from Bladder and Kidney trouble,
and that was cnredby DIR. David Kennedy's
Fayorite Remedy-made at Rondout, N. Y,
-and look forward to spending the balance
OF my life free from torture and with heart
grateful for the medicine which affords me
50 pleasanta prospect.-Rev. S. G. Chandler,
Lebanon Springs, n, Y.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
SUDDEN DEATH.

The papers are full ofsudden deaths. If
yon have choking sensations nutteriug, pain
or tenderness In chest faint easily, take Dr.
Miles New Cure for the Heart. and SO es-
cape death as did Henry Brown, druggist Of
Cleveland, Ohio. Sold by Biery & Thomas,
druggist.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
A Rare scoId.

/"Augustus," said Mrs. Henpeck severely,
81 see woman down In New Jersey has been
convicted Of being common scold. l should
like to see any brute of man try that on
mer
But you are no common scold, Maria,
responded Mr.. Henpeck, with a sigh. And
Mrs. Henpeck is still wondering what he
meant-Life
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

for young ladies who are troubled with
'reeles, pimples, moth and tan and a bad
skin generally to use liquid paints or dry
powders, for they only make the skin look
we'll for the time being. TO have a good
complexion you must have pure blood. Use
sulphur Biiters and youa skin will be pure
and complexion rosy.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
A DILEMMA.

] fain would limpid lines attune
Unto the climbing crescent moon; F.l .
Hail her as Luna calm, serene, I"
And eulogize her "silvery sheen;"
might the ''sllent stars" exalt r.
With comments upon heavens vault;
But when come to think it Ger
It's all been done so well before.
To sylvan and sequestered haunts
might repair and tune my chants
To mountain, fountain, rock or rill, u
To dale and vale, to brook and hill
/ might sing of the roses blush,
Or praise the linnet and the thrush;
Yea, that would but--what bore
It's all been done so well before.
might become a misanthrope,
Forego the charms Of joy and hope,
Assume pessimistic pose,
Compare life to withered rose.
With morbid cynicism sigh
And all the charms of life deny;
But-think Of the dyspeptic corps
It's all been done so well before.
OF Cupid might sing anew;
But rhymes for ''love" are, oh, so few;
And ev'ry Strephon nowadays
To his own Phyllis tunes his lays.
Beside all bards, the worst and best,
Have their ideas of love expressed.
Oh, grant me, MUSES., l implore
A subject never used beforel
Harry B. Smith in America.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

The bell in the steeple of the Union
church at Boyertown is 126 years old, and
was rung last week for the first time in 16
years.
German miners have won.
The best diamond cutter makesS60 per
week.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

farmers Boy (Illinois) Pop pop the
preire wolves are killing the stock ag'in.
y here's the gun? Old Farmer (sadly)-
My son. IT'S ag'in the law to shoot guns in
the city limits. We're in Chicago now.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
NEWS Annur TOWN.

1t is the current report about town that
kemp's Balsam for the throat and lungs is
milking some remarkable cures with people
who are troubled with coughs, sore throat,
Asthma Bronchitis and Consumption. Any
lruggist will give Won trial bottle free OF
cost. Ii is guaranteed to relieve and cure.
The large hotties are 50cand 81.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
A MARVEL GUS RECOVERY.
Or, KGan8dy's FaV0rits Remedy.
DIR. DAVID KENNEDY, RONDOUT, N, Y,
el per bottle Six for &c. By all druggists.

-Guest-I wanta rope fire escape placed
in my room. Call Boy-Yes, sir; I'll bring
up your bill Those VINO have chance to
escape with their lives paw their bills in ad.
vance.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
The Amcrican Hotel svstep,

Proprietor leverage hoteD-Very sorry,
sir, but you will have to leave this house at
once
Guest-Goodness mel What have / donei
Proprietor (solemnlyl-Y said something
to a waiter which has displeased the cook
New York Weekly
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

-Postess tabout fifty years old)--No the
Of The Cycle Magazine does not speak very
favorahly of my work, but he refers to me
as ''young poetess,' and there's good
deal Of consolation in that
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

Bolivia has one of the most interesting
exhibits at Paris. II is practical and
natural size model of lead mine-a
famous one-out Of which many large
fortunes have been made. The entrance
to it is through a special pavilion, erect
ed by the Bolivian government
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
One Wav Omen.

Wife (weeping)-I haven't had new dress
for year, and (boo-hool you're mean old
thing, so therel
Husband-But, my dear, don't blame me.
This is the dull season in business
Wife-Well, why don't you fail, theni-
Cloak and Suit Review
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

With evening dress, of course, the sash
may be worn. With the sack dress coat
colors are permissible, but black Cum
berbund is considered the best form when
the swallowtail is douned.
Several new Parisian bows are bid
ding for favor az present The fact that
the buckle bow however, is a Yankee
creation, and aas just about run its
course, seems to have been forgotten by
the importers
That there win be anynumher of Teck
and puff scarfs sold, however, when the
bewildeiing number Of novel and beau
tiful styles which viii he put on the
market is considered, goes without say
ing.-Clothier and FuInisher
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

SATAN at the portcullis-Wh are you?
Lost Soul--In the other world was a fe-
male novelist OF the erotic school. Satan
Go to. It's hotenough down here already.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

"A factory for the manufacture of
"horse millinery is being erected in Pitts
ton
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

The Penn Iron company after thirteen
weeks suspension, have resumed, employ
inn. $50 hands.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

Nearsighted Man ,at dime museum, closely
examining mummyi--May ask
Proprietor Of Museum hastily producing
revolverl-Get outside that railing, sirl I'll
shoot the first man that tries any of that
darned Frenchman's elixir on that mummy
Chicago Tribune.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

--Bascom-Don't you feel as if it was
rather risky to send Jonas to collegs. Back
'ot2 Backlos-Not mite. Jonas has got
too much common sense for edikation to
hurt him
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

Recent importations contain in their
number bar pin set with eight upright
rows of diamonds varying in size each
way from the center.-Jeweler's Review
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

A dentist in York, Pa, extracted a
lady's thirty-two teeth-all she had--at
a single sitting,
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07
Rrieln4,s Disease.
a 1'en.Yrnr-Old ChEd Saved After che
Fmnnre OF Eaur IhN sieinns.

a Zen. Yrnr-Old CHA Saved After che
Faiiure OF Eour Ehysioians.
Myltlc girl ten yoars OF age. WAS taken sick in
March, 1855 with scarlet fever. When recovering
sho took "a Severe cold which developed Bright'a
were terribly swollen, she had a burning fever, and
oil tho symptoms Of on aggravated case Of Brght's
Disease Tourcf our best physicians attended her,
but without euccess, and
Her Life was Osspaired Of.
BUS amother's love and prayers surmount oil Diff
oultios ani 1 determined to Try Dr. David Kennsdy'a
Favorite Rcmcdy 11ade ut Bgnaout, Il Y This was
last resort snd hoped although my little dsIgif
tar's case q very severe one, that The Fovorita
Remedy would DO lr her what t had dono for otllefa
iess. How harry nm that deierndnod upon this
courso-for an Improvement yFas at once perceptible
The foyor Acr appetite iinIroved gained
six pounds in o short time, and ono hy one tho we'll
known ane drcadol syIaptos Of tho disease left hes
Words fill tocNp.oss my Errtita3a and cannot too
earnestly recommcnd ;ho FavoIite Renedy. 1t was
A MARVELLOUS RECOVERY.
and is duo cptiroly Go the Tavorito Remedy, which
Nas tho oplyt lle.neiuo taken after her case waq
mrs 55siiraA. Hepptqn, Vest ,sutland vermout
pphi and VARIOUS o,hor complaints often leave
behind toni eequglGs OF the most dangerous char
acteE @ M 10 sXpei Sli traces q such disorders, tone
and nutritious blood Gso DR.. David Kenneays
Dr. KGln8dy'S FavOritG Remedy.
Prepared by
DIR. DAVID KENNEDY, RONDOUT. NJ. Y.
elper bottle Six for &c. BY all druggists.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

Old Swineford-See here, my young man,
why don't you get up and give one of those
ladies seat1
District Telegraph Boy loutraged)--Holy
smoked Why don't you git up an give both
of 'em seats?-Muasey's weekly.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-09-07

A peach grower at Marshallville, Ga,
clear profit of $1,000 on one
carload of peaches shipped to New York.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1889-04-11
PENSION RULINGS.

Ruling That is of Interest to Heirs Of
PensiOners-A Decision Reversed.
WASHINGTON, April Accommodations
Tanner, of the Pension Bureau, with the
approval of the Secretary of the Interior,
has issued the following ruling: ''Pur.
suant to the act of Congress, approved
March 1, 1880 whenever q pension certifi-
cate OF any character, original, increase,
restoration, arrears or otherwise, sha II
have been issued by this bureau and the
beneficiary mentioned therein is found to
have died before payment, the amount due
on said certificate to the date of said PEN
sioner's death will be paid to the widow
of such pensioner. If there be no widow
then said amount will be paid to the mi.
nor children of said deceased pensioner.
If there be neither widow nor minor chill.
dren then the amount due said deceased
pensioner will, in the discretion of the
Secretary of the Interior, be paid to the
executor or administrator of his estate"
REVERSED THE RULING.
WASHINGTON, April 4.-Assistant Secre-
tary of the Interior Bussey has reversed
the decision of his predecessor, Judge
Hawkins, in the zimmerman pension case.
The latter was a soldier of an Ohio regi-
ment during the civil war and one day
while skylarking with some of his COM
rades was thrown down, breaking several
bones and sustaining other injuries from
the fall A few years ago zimmerman ap-
piled for pension, which was refused by
Judge Hawkins upon the ground that the
injury of the applicant was not received
in the line of duty. The reversal of this
decision entities zimmerman to large
amount of back pay.