The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-09-07
The Bachelors Club.

into a fierce determination as be
wickedly brought down his ham
bone to call the meeting to order
So sudden was his action that
Bachelor Steunenberg choked on
a cork, and Secretary Fahy tried
to nibble white check for timber
ger cheese.
81 have concluded to resign
my high Office" savagely said the
president. 81 have it on good auth
ority that charges will be preferred
against me on the grounds that
several articles of feminine APP
parel were found charged in my
last months bill. I will make no
defense. If l can't enjoy the con-
fidence of the members of the club,
l don't want any honors. l there
fore tender my resignation"
On motion of Bachelor Cakes,
who was going to prefer the charges
above referred to, President Re-
bert's resignation was accepted.
On motion of Bishop Sisson, Prof.
Bed Springs Harmon was elected
president by reclamation.
After thanking the Club for the
honor conferred upon him, at the
same time sliding a ham sandwich
in his coat tail pocket, President
Harmon said he had great treat
to announce to the club. can hon
orable member had just returned
from over the sea, and had kindly
consented to address the Club that
evening. Said member was a man
of rare eloquence, a close observer
good judge Of human nature, Of
answering fidelity to the order, 8
gentleman and scholar, in short,
I take pleasure in presenting tt
you our highly honored brother
Monsieur Patrick J. Fahy."
Bachelor Fahy arose amid. wild
applause and popping of beer bot
ties, and modestly commenced:
"Monsieurs-Not wishing to tire
you with a detailed statement O
my travels, | will relate little ad
venture l had in gay Paree. One
morning as l was strolling dowr
boulevard du lunch counter, | saw
coming briskly toward me a French
man who looked strangely familiar
AS we drew nearer together my
eyes began to stick out like mar
bles and an engaging smile over
spread my Paree countenance
Surely said to myself, surely
cannot be mistaken; those militar.
moustache, those classical features
those alfalfa button hole bouquet
those store clothes; it is! it canno
be otherwise! it is my old ldah
friend, Monsieur DeVersP Will
a cry of recognition impulsivel.
rushed forward and seized his hand
But instead of the hearty pressur
I expected, the hand was coldl.
withdrawn, and with a Taught.
bow, my supposed friend said
Monsieur one great fool, re max
one grand mestakel My name i
Boulanger, on re way to issue z
manifesto; ze seconds will wait O
Monsieur Well boys, | was PAL
alvzed. The cussed frog eater too
away my breath, hut l realize
that I had been challenged t
a duel by Gen. Boulanger. NJ.
first thoughts were to jump off
the Eiffel tower, and actually starr
ed to carry out my design. At tn
foot of the tower, however, luck
thought struch me. Taking N
note book l hastily scrubbed tn
following, and sent to his residence
You old blower--Not penetrating my di
guise you rashly challenged me TO fight.
will meet y,u for $4,000 side and Il
championship of he world, TO finish.
am, sir, yours truly,
JOHN L. SULLIVAN.
Well sir, it worked like charm
The messenger came back in ha
an hour with an apology and an ii
vitation to supper. Of course
went. and truly the old Gen. coul
not do enough for me. He got stuc
| on my shape, took me in and gay
me introduction to President Ca
not, and we beat him out of thrt
bottles of beer at "solo." Q
closer observation, however, | see
, wronged Monsieur De Vers, and
want to apologize to him. Boulan
er is much coarser. But speakir
of coarseness reminds me of Quee
Victoria"
> Here Bachelor Brown aro'
!, to a point of order, and loud
called attention to Section | of Il
Bylaws, which reads: mo mer
: Der shall occupy the floor long
:. than ten minutes without refres
ments," and also called attentit
to the truthfulness of that trite o