The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1889-02-07
MISCELLANEOUS.

good joke after it is over.-Merchant
TrGUeier.
1t is matter of economy as well
as mercy to properly mate horses that
have to work side by side.
According to a Chicago wagon.
maker, white oak requires eighty years
to mature; shellbark hickory, from
thirty to fifty years; white ash, fifty
years; tulip trees, sixty or more years,
and red or Norway pine, at least sixty
years.
"A Kalamazoo girl was engaged in a
public gum chewing contest at Mime
apolis, and after an exhibition of rapid
chewing her jaws ''set. " She become
almost frantic and rushed off to
physician, who discovered that some of
the muscles of her jaws were paralyzed.
In short time the trouble passed
away, but she declares she has no
further use for gum.
"A regulation has been adopted in
the Michigan State prison by which
hereafter convicts may earn the right
to wear plain gray suits instead of the
prison stripes. Men who obey the
prison rules for six months may discard
the stripes; but if after that period they
become unruly again they must once
more don the Objectionable clothing.
The law does not apyly.-'I just
think the authorities ought to send
that Persian Minister back, so do, ;"
remarked Mrs. Snaggs. Whats the
matter now?' asked her husband.
''Why, not long ago they fined London
minister 81, 900 for coming this eoun-
try, and here they let Persian Minis
ter come in without saying word. l
expect he's not orthodox, either. -
Pittsburgh Chronicle Telegraph.
Tom Ga borrower)- say, Dick,
I've made bet with Harry and you
are the only one who can keep it.
Once upon time, you know, Douglas
Jerrold was asked by an acquaintance
if he had the courage to lend him a
guinea, and Jerrold replied that he
had the courage but he hadn't the
guinea Now, have always believed
that you would give me different am
swer if l should ask you the same
question, wouldn't you?" Dick-''Yes,
/ would" Tom-'tSo, I've won the
bet. Can you accommodate me with
the loan of five?" Dick-''My dear
boy, I've got the money, but haven't
the courage. o yes, Jerrold and
differ - KGrabee Blade.
The Western papers speak of a man
taking his private car and skipping fol
a journey of two or three hundred
miles, as though it were a matter O.
every day occurrence. Such, indeed
: is the fact. Private cars in Chicago
are almost as common as yachts in New
> York. Every man, from the attorney
, OF a railroad down through the bound
. less qualifications of it's management
D until the clerks are reached, controls
q the movements of p private car to |
! greater or less degree. A Chicagt
: railroad attorney will step into his owl
S car and take run down to Milwaukee
: in the most matter-of-fact manner il
9 the world. 1t never occurs to him tina
= he Is uOlHS OH uuuouStt bA4uSs anu yC
4 to a New Yorker the performance seem
: based upon wealth in unrivalled mag
# nitude.
>, -Misapplied Mythology. My dear
s Ihave been reading up within the pas
!, week, and I think l have name 70
Il our baby" said Mrs. Greening, as he
IS liege lord emerged from his bath thi
morning. you have, eh? What
e, it?' Il read that Phoebus, the god c
> day, comes up bright and beautiful i
. the morning; that he lights the world
At that without him -" ''Now, loo
ut here, madam; let's have no foolishnes
lie here. You can't call that child by an
T. such name! Did Phoebus of histor
=, ~ yell from II p. m. to 8 a. m. and intel
er mittently from to z? myself am d.
,u ing the god-of-day business in the ma
is ter of getting up, and I'm not dividin
re honors. If you want mythologic'
az prenomen for that destroyer of rest,
~ have it, what is it?.' asked Mr.
i'd Greening, with considerable asperit.
ey Aurora brutally yelled Elisha. The
he he left the house.-Detroit Journal.