davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23
Bridget and Polly.

New York Truth.
There was an incipient riot at the
Lorena apartment house a few days
since, and it all became about be
cause Ralph Harrison, of the Hote
Register brought two balded-heade6
parrots into the building. These
active and irreligious birds were
born and brought up amid surround
ings that must have been honest, fol
they were miserably poor and the
ordinary school education, which was
the only advantage possessed by the
couple, was taken where the extent OF
learning was measured by the worm
wood and gall of the conversational
powers. Mr.. Harrison moved in
on Tuesday, and on Wednes-
day the parrots had become
thoroughly acclimated and lubricat'
ed their language ready for any
emergency that might require its
employment. The opportunity was
not long in coming Two cooks EN-,
ployed on the second and fifth floors
respectively INDUCED in the custo-
mary exchange of condolences from
their windows on the air shaft, and
remarked in an incidental manner OF
the delicacies each expected to enjoy
for dinner. Suddenly, at the most
intensely exciting period of the CON
fidence, q voice rang out with all the
conciseness and clearness of a philos-
pher chary of his breath:
"Oh. shut up!'
"Shut up, who?" came excitedly
from the second story.
"Oh, shut up!' was repeated.
"Shut up yourself, you freckled
huzzy; what right have you to inter-
rupt us?" came from the fifth.
Eyes, you impudent thing, it would
be more becoming for you to mind
your own business" echoed the
second.
"Show your frowzy head out OF
your window, wherever you are, and
I'll fill it with redhot ashes" was the
upper floors threat.
"Rats!" came the voice again.
"Hold your tongue" ] tell ye, you
miserable insultin' nuisance, cor III
complain to Mr.. Burte about ye."
Mr.. Burte is the cyclone that pre-
serves order among discordant
tenants.
81 know who We are, confound ye,
and I'll get even with We. I'll make
life burden to ye," was uttered in IL
falsetto shrek from second.
"Shut up, SHUT UP, SHUT UP?'
came in a volley, and whether it was
the vehemence of the continued as
sault or that the infuriated chefs
caught sight of the green feathers
and yellow head of their tormentor
as Mrs. Harrison removed him from
the neighborhood of the window and
placed him further indoors, is not
known. but of sudden the air shaft
became as silent as the husband OF
a prima donna, until the laughter
of that wise bird, smothered by dis
lance, came to the grateful con-
seriousness of the amused listeners
thereabouts.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23
Saved From the Blizzard.

Capt. Grozier, a Waterman, got
caught in the snow-storm while on
his way from his ranch on Diamond
Creek, Tex, to Chloride, asmall min
ing camp. He was mounted, but
soon lost his way. He had neither a
gun with him to discharge and thus
attract attention and help, nor
matches to start a fire. All he had
was pocket-knife. When he found
that he was fast getting benumbed
he killed his horse with the knife,
took out the entrails and crawled in
to the warm carcass. Completely
covered with snow he remained in
this retreat for three days. When he
was missed a party went out to hunt
for him and was successful in its
search. He was taken to q nearby
mining camp and was properly at
tended to: He was badly frost-bit-
ten.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23
Whittier's Internal Machine,

Not long after the close of the war
of the rebellion a small but heavy
box came by express from Lookout
mountain to the poets home, then
in Amesbury. When the cover was
removed a peculiar array of iron
points was visible. His niece, who
was a dearly beloved adopted daugh-
ter, cried out in terror: ooh, Uncle
Greenleaf, don't touch it! It's some
dreadful explosive thing those south
erners have sent to kill you! Don't
touch it!' To pacify her it was bur-
led deep in the garden. The next
days mail brought letter from a
friend, saying he had sent an ink.
stand quantity modelled from south
ern balls and northern bullets picked
up from the famous Tennessee bat
tle-feld. From it's SYNONYMOUS bur-
ial it was resurrected to post Of
honor on the poets antique desk,
and still graces the garden ROOM
Worcester Spy.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23

wsveriy (Mo) Times, Dec. 6
Casper Weaver is a German. He was
born in Hessen, Germany, in 1889,
landed at New York in 1856, lived in
Pennsylvania and New Jersey years.
From thence he moved to Georgetown,
KY, where he subsequently Joined the
confederate army, and became tried
and true soldier of that famous chief
tain, Gen. John Morgan, serving
through that distinguished revolution
which put at rest the question of seces-
sion. After the close of hostilities he
came with other friends to Waverly,
Lafayette county, Missouri, U. ). A.,
where he still resides, peaceful, law
abiding citizen and good neighbor. A
few weeks since he was induced by the
solicitation of his friends to Join them
in pooling chances in the November
drawing of the Louisiana State Lottery,
by which he has as one OF four in the
club, come in possession OF one-fourtl
of one-twentieth of the capital prize Of
$500. 900, being the comfortable sum Of
So, $50. Three others have also received
their money which was collected by the
Middleton bank of Waverly, Mo-, theil
names are Albert Goodwin, William Is
rael and colored man named Robert
Stewart, all of whom live in this city
and are oil well known to our people
They will doubtlebs in the future al
they have in the past continue to o:
warm friends of that institution which
has so wonderfully surprised them all
For the average man, though hopeful, II
generally disappointed if successful
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23
Slower Than Christmas.

Yes, my son, yes, Philadelphia is
slow old town-a slow, pokey, check
er board Quaker town. 1t is as you
say, an overgrown country village.
One of the villagers has just given
81 500, 900 for the establishment of
free school of mechanical trades,
wherein the instruction, boarding
and lodging are free. The villager
has done this all very quietly, while
New York is loudly declaring what q
monument she would build to the
memory of Grant if somebody else
would furnish the money. Oh, yes!
Philadelphia lisa slow town. THERE'S
no life in it. Once in a while q villa
ger like Isaiah Williamson gets off a
Joke of the industrial school pattern
that makes the angels laugh. But
your Jokes about Philadelphia, my
son, makes other peoplelaugh. Yes,
indeed. Got one ready now? Well,
fire it off, and we'll listen to the
cracking of the thorns. How cheer
full they sound. Pity they don't last
longer.-Burdette in Brooklyn Ea-
gle.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23
Miss Marion Laugdon.

Among the numerous pretty women
in New York there is one who is never
spoken of without the proper prefix to
her name. She is beautiful, gracious,
lovely and lovable, but she has never SO
Ear forgotten her womanliness as to have
conducted herself in such way that her
name is freely used behind shop coun-
ters, or that there is general wonder
ment as to how she is going to behave
herself. This is Miss Marion Langdon
and when one looks at her one cannot
but wish that the numerous Mays and
Fannies, Jennies and Kitties, Babys
and Gerties would learn the lesson that
even her appearance teaches. Good
breeding, like good teaching, is coming
in fashion and then where will be the
standing of the young woman who imi-
tates the fast young man in her man
ners ?-Philadelphia Times New York
LETTER
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23
Blown From a Gun,

From Hayes History of the Sepoy War.
During the Sepoy rebellion of 1857,
SO many of the mutineers were
blown away from the guns. 1t was
terriblep punishment, one which had
been inflicted a century before at the
first mutiny of the Bengal army in
1764. A battalion of Sepoys had
seized and imprisoned it's English OF
ficers and vowed that it would serve
no more. A strong hand arrested
the mutiny atits beginning Twenty
four Sepoys were tried by a drum
head court martial, fourSd guilty
sentenced to be blown away from the
cannon.
On the day of the execution the
troops were drawn up, English and
Sepoys, the guns were loaded, and
the prisoners led forth to suffer the
terrible penalty.
The word of command was given
for the first four criminals to be tied
I'D to the muzzles of the guns. AS
the men were being bound four tall
stately grenadiers stepped forward
from among the condemned Sepoys,
saluted the commander. Maj. Hector
Munro, chief of the Bengal army,
and asked that as they had always
had the post of honor in life, they
might be given the precedence in
death, as it was their due. The re-
quest was granted The grenadiers
were tied to the gums and blown to
pieces.
A murmur ran through the Sepoy
battalions, who grea tly outnum-
bered the English troops, and it
seemed as if they were about to. res
cue their companions, the twenty
condemned men.
The officers of the Heterogeneous
approached Munro and told him
their Rlen were not to be trusted. as
they had determined not to permit
the execution to proceed. The CHIEF
knew thai on the issue OF that
parade for execution depended the
fate of the Bengal army. The En-
glish troops were few and there was
scarcely man among them not
moved to tears by the fearful death
of the four grenadiers. But the com
mander knew that they could be
| trusted to defend the guns, which,
| turned upon the Sepoys, would de-
feat any attempt to rescue their
comrades.
Mai. Munro closed the English on
the battery-the grenadiers on one
side, the mariners on the other-and
loaded the pieces with grape. Then
he sent the Sepoy officers back to
their battalion and gave the native
regiments the word of cammand.
"Ground arms!"
"They knew it would be madness
to disobey in presence Of the loaded
guns and laid down their arms"
Fright about face! Forward
march," was the next command.
The Sepoys marched a distance
from their grounded arms, and the
English soldiers, with their guns,
took ground on the intervening
space.
The danger had passed away.
The native troops were at Munro's
mercy, and the execution went on to
its dreadful close. The sacrifice of a
few lives saved thousands.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23
Oriental Justice.

The old Mussulman Justice, the justice
of the arabian Nights" was admins
tered by o cadi according to his innate
notion of the fitness of things, modified
or confirmed by more or less appro-
pirate text from the Koran. In CRITICS.
ing native Justice we must bear in mind
that this system existed in Egypt within
the memory of a middle aged man. In
Bowring's report upon Egypt, published
in 1910, he gives various instances of this,
and exemplifies oriental notions of JUS
tice by conversation he relates between
a Mohammedan and IN English travel
Ter. Governor-Is it true that you in
England send your thieves and rogues
to q distant country? Traveller-yes.
Governor-and what may be the cost Of
sending each? Traveller-perhaps f100
or 10, 600 piastres. Governor-and what
is the cost of sabre? Traveller-about
910 or 1000 piastres. Governor-and
what is the cost of a hempen rope?
Traveller-almost nothing. Governor
and you call yourselves civilized and
an instructed people, you who can get a
ssber for 1000 piastres and rope for
almost nothirg-a sabre that would be.
head many rogues and rope that would
hang many thieves-and who pay 10, 600
piastres to get rid of one! This is your
civilization.-The Fortnightly Review.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23

s. r. Roger and his brother left their
homes near Hastings, Mich, about four
years ago and went to Breckenridge,
Colo, where they worked in a stamp
mill. They got possession of two
claims, the "Iron Mask" and the exc
vance, and worked them during spare
hours, putting considerable time and
money into them. The claims had been
worked previously for six years by IN
old miner, who failed to find paying
ore. Roger recently put man in the
lower one, and went to work himself
In less than half an hour, after digging
about two feet, lie struck gold and sill
yer bearing carbonate of silver, said to
be the most valuable and easily worked
deposit in that state. The vein was fol-
lowed to the surface, when it was found
that all the previous years work had
been within eighteen inches of the vein.
The Roger brothers have been offered
300, 900 for the two mines, but want
100000. Within week after this find
5000 men were on the spot establishing
claims, but the Rogers had secured
many of the most desirable. The mine
is on the east side of the mountain, and
the snow necessitates keeping it rooted
oyer,-Chicaoo Tribune,
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23

A distressing occurrence is now being
turned over and over by the scandal
mongers of fashionable circles. One
night during the past week policeman
found an elegantly dressed lady wander
ing about the streets in condition of
maudlin intoxication. She could give
no information as to where she lived or
by what name she was known, and the
officer therefore took her to the station
house. After being there for some time
she recovered sufficiently to realize
where she was and begged piteously to
be taken home. About the same time
her husband entered the station house,
having been in search of her for several
hours, and at once deposited collateral
for her appearance at the police court
in the morning, and took the lady away.
He was high official of the war depart
ment His wife had been at fashion
able assembly during the exening in
question, had partaken too freely to
WINE, and had wandered forth unob-
served, only to be gobbed up by the
police. Washington Letter.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23
A CAPTIVE for Thirteen Years.

Miss Jessie Lacomber, who is max.
ing short visit to this city, says
The San Francisco Call, has a roman
tic history. She is the stepdaughter
of Gen. Lagreato, a retired Mexican
officer, who became a citizen of the
United States many years ago.
Miss Josie Was stolen from her par
ents in 1871 by the Banitto tribe OF
Indians of northern Idaho. For
thirteen years her parents were I'M
aware of her whereabouts, and many
times had given her up for dead.
The matter was brought to the at
tention of the United States govern
ment and a search begun. Gen.
Sheridan was the man selected to
look up the case, and after pro-
tracted investigation, in which the
department at Washington expended
many thousand dollars, and during
which many lives were lost, she was
rescued Aug. 7, 1884. The guide
whom Gen. Sheridan employed during
his search was the famous Dosh
Kensington, q great Indian scout
and frontiersman.
Miss Lacomber is a woman per-
haps 26 years of age, and although
giving no evidence of careful educa-
ton, is quite intelligent, and is not
in any wise reticent about relating the
history of her captivity.
When she arrived at the age of l3
one of the chiefs of the Banittos de-
claring that he would make her his
wife. She Indignantly refused, de-
;laring that she wished to 60 back
to her parents.
In order to force her to marry the
copper colored captain the Indians
resorted to easy methods of torture,
but, finding it impossible, gradually
increased the dose. AS evidence of
the ordeal which she suffered Miss
Lacomber now exhibits sixteen
wounds, the result of knife gashes,
On her person. Finding they could
. aot prevail upon her to comply, the
5arbarians forsook their brutal
methods, and for the remainder OF
her stay contented themselves with
keeping a strict watch upon her
movements.
After being rescued Miss Lacomber
went to her home only to find that
ner father had been killed by the
Mexicans along the Rio Grande for
participating in clearing some rene
gades from Texas.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23
The MOther-in.Law.

Perhaps to-day there is no relation
IN life in which woman is so persist
emily abused and misunderstood as
in that to her daughters husband,
says the New York Press. 1t has
oeen made the theme ofthe Jest book,
The circus clown, and the topical
songster ad nauseam. In the vulgar
and witless warning against matri-
:nony, sung by Nadjy, it is encourag-
'ng to note that the hit at mother
in.law" extracts only a sickly smile
from the audience. No doubt this is
due to the staleness of the subject
quite as much as it's false sentiment,
but let us hope it marks n revulsion
IN public taste, Notwithstanding that
air bride, Amelle Rives, who makes
Herod say:
Methinks that Satan was q married man,
and his wifes mother egged him to rebel, zee,
ing Heaven would not hold them both
People are beginning to find out
that when a man vilifies his mother
n-law it is generally safe to assume
that he ill-treats his wife. A young
girl, when she marries, takes it for
granted that her husbands love and
devotion will continue to be hers as
much as the sunshine and air. The
mother, from her wider observation
and perhaps bitter experience, is full
Of fears and alarm. When her daugh-
ter stood at the altar she trembled
She was losing not only her child, but
her power of insuring that child's
happiness. Her maternal eye, keen
as eagles, seeks to pierce the future;
but no. she must fold her brooding
wings and wait with beating heart
to learn if this marriage meant the
highest happiness or the greatest
misery that comes towoman.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23
Pussy Pays Her Own Board.

A correspondent of the Maine Farmer
speaks q good word for the cat, and ad-
vises the farmer to keep several. Fur
thermore, the correspondent says, the
cat ought to be kept we'll. just keep
your hired man, or even yourself, 80
meanly that you have not strength to
work-you accomplish but little. Just
SO with your horse, with your cows,
with your cats. The case of man who
lost 500 worth of property by mice
girdling young apple trees is cited, and
kept half q dozen cats it would have
been money in his pocket. He might
have had the credit of having the best
in town, and taken comfort himself, be-
sides making his family happy and saw
Jag his trees. -Lewiston (Me.) Journal.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23
Soap vs.. Law.

A Missouri constable rode out to a
farm near st. Joe, armed with sub
pena for a woman who was wanted
as a witness in case in court. He
found her in her backyard, busily en-
gagged in string boiling, bubbling
mass in q large black kettle. He
stated his business, and she said:
II can't go to-day"
"But you must"
"What's the hurry"
"Why, courts in session, and the
case is now on trial. They want you
by noon"
'"Well, 1 amt going. You think
I'm going off and leave this hull kit
tie o saft soap to Spite, just to please
your old court? No sirree!"
"Why, my dear madam, you must.
You really don't seem to understand
81 understand that I've got a big
kittle O. splendid soap greese On the
bile, and it'll make thin, sticky soap
if it amt finished to-day. You go
back and tell the jedge So"
"You'll be fined for"
"Pooh! Pdlike to see the Missoury
Jury that'd fine a woman for not
ieaven' her soap bilin' when it was
at a critical pint, as one might say.
Tell the jedge I'll come tomorrow, il
we don't butcher our pegs then; an
if we do, I'll come some day next
week"
"But tell you that won'tdo. You
must come now"
"Lookee, young man, you think
Pm fool? rekcon you never made
any soap, did you? Ifyou had, you'd
"What does the judge care about
your soap?"
well, what do care bout the
ledge, if it comes to that? Laws law
and soaps soap. Let the judge tend
to my soap. The good book says
there's time for everything, an
this is my time fer bar1 o. saft
SOAP"
"Well, madam, if you want to be
fined for contempt of court, all right.
You will be fined sure as"
"Bahl know oil bout the law,
an there amt anything in it, nor in
the Constitution of the United States.
nor in the Declaration of Injeepend-
ence, nor in nothin' else, that says a
woman's got to leave kittle o. half
cooked soap, and go off to court
when she amt mind to. guess
know little law self, "-Tid-Bits.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23
The Richest Town

The little town of Brookline, Mass.
which is nearly surrounded by Bos-
ton, is valued for purposes of taxa
ton at $4O7, 454 ,028, which is more
than one and a half times as much as
the valuation of the whole state OF
New Hampshire. 1t is the wealthiest
town of it's size in America, and
mainly because it has the reputation
of being a taxpayers parad Use.
Boston Traveller.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23

Often shrinks from consulting a physician
about functional arrangement, and prefers
to suffer in silence. This may be mis-
taken feeling, but it is one which is largely
prevalent. TO all such women we would
say that one OF the lost skillful physicians
OF the day, who has had vast experience
in curing diseases peculiar to women, has
prepared remedy which is OF inestimabie
aid to them. We rei-r to DR.. Pierce's Fa-
vorite Prescription. This is the only rem.
edy for woman's peculiar weaknesses ana
ailments, sold by druggists, under posi-
tive guarantee from the manufacturers,
that it will give satisfa ction in every case
or money refunded. See guarantee printed
ON bottle WRAPPER.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23
Petticoat Government Not Irksome.
San Francisco Report

san FRANCISCO REPORT.
The Rev. DIR. Benjamin Akerly, the
venerable Episcopalian minister OF
Oakland, said the other evening to
pretty young lady from New York.
GIN looking over my career, find
that have been ruled by a woman
all my life. When | was a boy my
mother ruled me, when got married
I had to do as my wife wished, and
now I find that / am not independent
of my daughters commands.
"And yet, you seem to have sur
vived pretty well under their tyran-
meal sway" remarked the young
lady.
'sfndeed have" said Mr.. Akerly,
"and were to confess should say
that had 1 always followed their
sound advice / should have made
fewer mistakes in my life"
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23
FIch,e Sleeping by tho side or Hegol


Owing to the widening of the APP
proaches to the new gate, a number OF
the inmates of the old Dorothenstadter
cemetery, in Berlin, had to be disturbed
in their last resting places. Some eight
or ten well-known celebrities were ex-
humed, and their remains reinforced in
the French cemetery. Among these
we're the remains Of Fichte (died in
in 1910, which have now been placed
side by side with those of Hegel; of the
iurists, Carl August Klenze; tie philos-
opher, George Andreas Gable; the coun-
cillor of medicine, w. Bremen; the nov
elist, Baroness Won Imhoff, together
with those of Hufeland and his CO.
worker, Professor Osann. This Gods
.cre now contains the largest number OF
Germany's great dead.-Berlin Letter.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-02-23
Consanguinoous Marriages.

Investigating marriages of near rela-
tives, Mr.. A. 81. Huth concludes, as did
Mr.. G. II. Darwin some years ago, that
the popular belief in sterility, or deaf
mute, idiotic or deformed offsprings, as
natural result of such unions, is with
out foundation in fact. The effect is
really to intensity the tendencies COM
mon to the progenitors, and it is only
when the tendencies thus liable to be
magnified in the descendants are bad
that unions of cousins need be avoided.