New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1889-11-23
THE TALK OF The DAY.

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@Tle your necktie, SIR" Don't be surprised If al
usher should address this question to you as you All
! taking of your ovcrcOat in the foyer of the oper
! house It IS new business, started in Philadelphia
and VIII doubtless get here this winter You let tn
polite ard respectful young adjust your tic, whic
has been diSaTanged by your wraps, and after spph
a quarter In his open hand you 20 in, feeling tina
! you are all right. 1t is great thing for you, bu
still greater thing for the usher wlW will soon max
enough out Of the business to buy one Of those won
dcrfully cheap villas in Jcrseyville or Wimansand
II Was an EyeOpener.-1he idea that convict in
state prison had any legal rights left him never seems
to have entered the mG 9 OF sno bV prisoner for
damages for brutal treatment and had to pay anou,
the wariens have laid aside the Instruments Of torture
-(Detroit Free Press.
And now We are told that revolutionary spirit
is growing in Portugal This is all very WELL out
the trouble in Europe Is that they apt to pick
their revolutions before they are ripe
Wanted Information-It wasn't so many years age
here in Detroit that two were on trial for as
sault and battery. Tho evidence was plain and con.
the Jury would find a verdict IN five minutes. Ihey
didn't though being out long Two hours ana lhon 1t
was announced that one was holding Out against tle
DO you want to ask for any legal information on
any particular point7' asked his Honor as tne jury
II do answered the obstinate Juror.
GO ahead D.. o.nvs,. my,
to ask IL II Is right lot mo 10 o"n'o0 my
And il was found that they held that very relation
to him. Detroit Free Press
1t seems that the Parisians have coined new word
struggle for ufeurso to designate lively. go-ahead
people who never say die. This word IS TOO ponder
ousv Anglican and scientific to live long on the boue
wards OF Paris. An adaptation OF one OF our own
words" hustleurs'-w be great deal more chc''
The Kind Of Paper lie sared.-Jones Hello, smith |;
back from the West again. ehl What did you DO out
smth-Started paper.
Jones-Aha What was tho name OF itI hal, r.s.
Smh-A subscription paper TO get me bacR East
again. Burlington Free Press.
Keen your eye on Canada, for 1t may decide that
It. too, wants to be republic one of these days.
Patriotic Oh, yes. of course. But the words
"United states of Canada would strike great many
Canadians as Just about the cheese. The beaver Is
a sccretve animal and doesn't caclde much, but he
does good deal of work. And tho beaver is, so to
speak, the national bird of Canada. Just now he is
couchant: some day he may be rampant.
station-Naster-C Come come, my good mani You
Tramp Cdisgustedly) The conductor says I can't
ride, and you say can't walk Mhn Aour oianie"
Old road here for, any way !-(LoweH CITIZEN.
The situation in a nutshell Tho Republicans OF
prazl have cracked the Imperial Brazil nut, and have
shipped the shells to Lisbon
Arithmetic -Tramp-Pease, sir wish 10 raise
twenty cents. If | get five cents apiece fOm four
men that will make up the sum. VIII you kindly
start the subscription with nckelF
Ttizcn~No but I'll tell you what I'll do: I'll give
Won one cent and you get the same sum from nineteen
other men and your object will be STANDARDIZATION
Courier.
Won can get the Throne Of Hawaii for triio of
asoo 400 perhaps less II you pay cash down. The
throne Is in good condition, having been recently
unbolstered with the best curled hair. The crown
and the sceptre both good new, will be thrown
in as King Kalakaua would like to go out OF the
king business II somebody will make 1t worth while
FOR him TO withdraw. At least the Hawaiian dIIky
birds say So
n,s Uolvhock-"I don't want anybody to stick
% Sarrcd 70 the Memory Of Betsy Hollyhock on me
r., I'm, gone; fer | heered anything yt that
I didn't fcrgit it."-(Ilarpers Bazar
"Tbe Congregatonast allows another correspond
Ont TO call in question the goodness and heroism
NJ tho late Father Damien. Cui bonol The man
IA dead let him rest 1t may be remarked In passing
not seem so heroic if they viewed through a
microscope.
Hospitality. physician with view TO
diarnosisl-What do you drlnkl
New Patient cheering up at the proposaD-oh,
sir thank you, Sir-Wh4tcVer you'll leave that TO
YOU sir .S-Q.Ondon Punch.
Orando Oregon. Is a town OF eight Inhabitants, four
men three women and a girl. As may be inferred.
/ has very little present less past but most glorious
future. At least the lively weekly newspaper pub
ilshed In the town says so.
This Is a Joke.-"I understand Mr.. waverng is d.
viding his attention between you and Miss Jones.
Clara ,,
as 10 which OF us 20 propose"
II have thought so. Don't you think she's a
Oh no, think she's very charming rl'-(Bos
ton Courier.
During the Paris Exposition go ,pichpockcts were
arrested OF whom 136 were French twenty three Eng
fish, and seven American. The small number OF
Americans arrested would indicate that our light
fingered gentry are moro def than their European
brethren.
SAYS "The Journal OF Education shake hands
with tho children occasionally you greet them III
tho morning. especially Of Monday morning."