The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1889-12-24
SOME ODD EPITAPHS.
Tombstone Inscriptions Found i'm DiffeI
ent Parts of the World.

Tombstone Inscriptions Found in Differ-
ent Parts of the World.
There Is always mysterious fasci-
nation for most all OF us about grave
yards, tombstones, monuments, and
any thing appertaining TO the dead.
The word epitaph is derived from two
Greek words meaning an inscription
and a monument The Greeks, the
Romans and the Egyptians raised
splendid tombs over their noble dead,
those of the Egyptians being probably
the Oldest. although in many cases it
is entirely impossible to approximate
the date of some of the immense
mounds raised in honor OF the dead in
our own country.
If what is written on tombstones
were strictly true the world would
scarcely have need of other history;
but unfortunately such is not the case.
The tender feelings of the survivors
influence them to forget the wrong
and write only the good, and in most
cases expand the latter as much as
possible.
One of the best and most epigram-
matte of epitaphs is that of Alexander
the Great. 1t is in Latin. which,
translated, is as follows:
Here mound suffices for one Tor whom the
world was not large enough
The following has the virtue of brew
ity, but contains the now tabbooed
pun. It is on the tombstone of Charles
Knight of England. and is simply:
Good knight.
Here is one from a headstone IL
Cornwall. England. and can be read
both ways:
Shall we all die,
We shall die all.
AL die shall We.
Die all we shall.
This one is on a London cook:
Peas 70 his III shes.
A great deal of libelous matter has
been written on tombstones concern
ing wives; the following is AZ example:
Within this grave do lie
Back to back my wife and L;
When the last trump the air shall fill,
IL she gets up I'll just lie still.
The next one breathes spirit of de-
vout resignation:
She once was mine;
And now
To Thee, o Lord. her resign;
And arr your Obedient. humble servant, Robert
Kemp.
Lawyers have always come in for
their share OF pOst-mOrtem abuse. The
following is taken from the tombstone
of Lawyer Strange:
Here lie an honest lawyeS
And that's Strange.
This is the epitaph of James Straw,
attorney. Lincolnshire. England:
Here lies James Straw,
Who forty years, sir. followed the law;
And when he died the Devil cried:
Jimmy give Us yer paw
The cpitaphs OF the great in West
minister Abbey are as a rule too long to
be quoted here. There are some ex-
ceptions. however, of which the fol-
lowing 10 Ben Jonson is one:
o Rare Ben Jonson-
That is all of it. but it speaks vol
umes.
In Denver. Col, is the tombstone of
a policeman which bears this inscripr
ton:
Move on, Mister: move on.
In rural graveyard in Massachu-
sets is the following:
Here lies Ezekiel Sounder. who was accident
ally killed in the isd year or his age This stone
was erected DV his grateful faslilv
This appears in a Southern grave
yard:
The Yankee hosts. with blood-stained han ds,
Came southwark to divide our lands;
This narrow and contracted spot
Is all that this poor Yankee got.
At San Antonio. Tex. in the mill
tary cemetery. on large board that
resembles a railway budapest, is
written the military command:
In Plsce-Rest,
Besides the trail which leads from
Fort Concho to Fort Davis. Tex. is a
lone grave. At its head is placed a
rough limestone slab. on which are
the Spanish words:
Quien sabes (who knows.
A passerby has scratched beneath
them:
dos sabe God knows).
Can any high-sounding phrase on
granite compare in pathetic
grandeur with this simple little cpl
taph over that solitary grave on
the sandy Texas Chicago
Tribune.
CNnDC nc oahNt