Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1889-07-19
THAT CROP OF FOOLS.


In discussing another subject IN
last weeks HERALD, we said the
crop of fools blooms every gear.
We should have said further, that
it is the most certain crop as to
time of maturity indigenous to
this country.
This is no matter of mere specu'
latlon with us. It's the result OF
wears of the st,observation-no,
experience. There is no particular
season for preparing for, or seeding
this crop. 1t pulls through any
kind of winter weather and spring
AWAY finds it fresh, vigorous and
ready for the harvest on very
short notice.
Anything like personal service is
not necessary. All that is required
is to line the the principal side
walks of the streets with bill
boards, have the fancy bill car
stand on the siding while the brush
and paste artists slash up the Sc
ductire pictures, and send oat rolls
of the same fascinating rainbow
colors to ornament the gables OF
the country barns.
Then the crop is ready to Take
in." We must all 60 to this show.
There are so many things on these
pictures we never saw ia a circus
before. We are the small sized
fools. we find it out next morn
ing without being toed. Oar first
impulse is to Jump out OF a third
story window. But douche bath
and a cup of hot coffee served by a
wife who takes this method of IN
fiicting the cruelest OF punishments.
sets US up.
We are obliged to receive the
treatment kindly, but our anxiety
to get away from that house is on.
~ equalled by the CELEBRITY with
which we don our clothes and rush
into the gosslping centre of town
OF urgent business.
The circus is gone; the streets
are deserted /; here and there is a
group of halt laughing little fools,
Just like US, and we JON them for
comfort. Each little fool tells what
he knows a certain big fool did,
and We all laugh till we shake
every thing hut the silver which
we carried yesterday morning. We
have a regular rendering of every
body's accounts but our own. One
little fool tells how he saw some
fifty or more big fools congregated
on Court street, near the
Graded School building, where
a man in a buggy sells med
icines and gives away dollar bills
for a while, then sells five dollar
bills for ones till he iubilates all
the hig fools in the street. Then
he gets more liberal. His charity
knows no bounds. Twenty dollar
bills become the only circulating
medium in less time than we tell
1t. Five minutes more, the man in
the buggy is gone. He has all the
twenty dollar bills in exchange for
a few ones, twos and fives left, with
the curious audience now gazing
wOnderingly after him.
But there is a guiding principle
with fools little and big. The
former "swear off from ever going
to another circus, and this solemn
obligation is kept till the elephants
come again aud the band plays.
The big fool says | will look for my
money where lost it. He goes
straight to the "COmmOns," sees
that pea under the shell. knows
exactly which one of the three
cards 1t Is because the corner IS
turned up, can beat that simple
buncO game dead sure, and then
he gets himself together for action
InduIgent subscribers, would you
believe 1t? we had a dozen men,
young and old, call on us Saturday
to arrest that Snowman and recov-
or lost money. But the truly good
man had taken the freight with
about $500 we know of.
There will be a full crop ready
for the next circus.