The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1889-07-17

Il Nv. ~ AlShbh w VIZ
Queen Victoria; but
at the same time, it is said that he has some
ideas about reform that are not altogether
10 be despised.
He always gets what money he requires
for his personal use, if the money is in the
country. When he sends out one OF his
wives-he has several thousand-to borrow
cup of parched coffee, or little brandy
in glass for the cramps, he always gets
It. Several thousand years ago one OF the
Shah's ancestors sent across the street for
the temporary loan of toothbrush, or
some similar agricultural implement, but
the unnelghborly neighbor sent back word
that he was using it. The consequence
was that the Shah then sent his private
executioner over with q bag and little
Ratchet to borrow the neighbours head,
and ever since that time the neighbors
have been so kind. They esteem it a favor
to be allowed to contribute.
The Shah Of Persia can readily supply all
his other wants. When he shakes his hand
at the saloonkeeper the latter knows what
to do But there is an aching void in his
treasury department. His government is
run similar to that of certain Texas city
that was financially embarrassed a few
years ago. There was no money in the
treasury, except city scrip, and that could
only be given away when q large chrome
was added as an inducement. The city
officials were only paid at large intervals,
and then in homeopathic doses, which,
nevertheless, caused some of them TO throw
up their commissions. The city assessor
had to sweep out the offices, act as police
man and light the street lamps, while the
only policeman of the town had to get on the
board as Alderman, drive the scavenger
cart and act as mayor when that function
ary was overworked or out Of town. 1t may
not be quite so bad as that in Persia, but
the situation is very discouraging.
The country is infested by robbers and
murderers, who have sufficient influence to
set the law at defiance or evade it. High
way robberies are committed almost within
sight of the Shahs palace. But the education
al condition of Persia is still more distressing.
There are no public schools worthy of the
name, consequently the young generation
of Persans is growing up in ignorance
One of the consequences of this is that
many Of them, not being qualified for any
other occupation, are loafers and vaga-
bonds, while all the lucrative positions are
being filled by outsiders, who come from
states where the free-school system reigns.
The Shah, who has travelled q great deal
in Europe, and is very observant man,
perceived that those countries in which ed
ucation and intelligence prevailed were
powerful and respected. He noticed this to
be the case with England and Germany.
heShah also visited Spain, Portugal and
Italy, and was surprised at the squalid pow
erty of the people, and the contempt which
other nations entertained for them. The
Shah made up his mind on his return to his
native country he would subdue the ban
ditti and establish an efficient system OF
public schools.
But to obtain the arrest of outlaws with
out offering rewards and to establish free
schools without money was very difficult
question to solve. The Shah had no large
school fund, and instead of cash balance
there was huge aching void in his treas
ury. Just as the Shah was about to
give up in despair, he was seized with a
raging toothache. Neither he nor his sew
eral thousand wives got wink of sleep for
whole week. Nothing could be done for
his relief. Id.
The Hakeems and Mollahs who ran the
augury and clairvoyant business in Persia,
held solemn conclave, and the oracle de-
clared that the only hope for relefwas in the
Shah holding certain root in his hand,
Upon further inquiry it was disclosed that
the root referred TO was the root of the
tooth. 1t just had to come out A French
dentist was escorted with brass band and
guard Of honor to the palace, and in the
presence of the officers of state, the
molar of the Shah was yanked out. A
royal salute was fired, and the entire people
gave themselves up to public thanksgiving.
But the point is this: SIT is customary
in Persia whenever the Shah is rescued
from any danger for the wealthy mobiles to
repair to- the palace, bringing with them
bags OF gold or rich jewels as presents"
On this occasion nearly all the wealthy
noblemen who had refused to contribute q
cent to the publo-school system or to offer
any reward for the stage robbers came for
ward and filed the Shah's Golfers.
The Shah got new wrinkle. He now sees
his way clear to establish free schools all
over Persia, and he will have enough money
left over offer rewards for the arrest of the
stage robbers. The Shah winked at his
minister OF finance not long ago, and init
mated that he had nineteen teeth left, and
that every one of them was hollow and
would have to come out, and also that he
rather enjoyed laughing gas. As long
as the teeth hold out the Shah will
have plenty of money to carry out
his reform measure. He says he would
rather go down into his grave without a
snag IN his head than TO have it SAID of him
that he encouraged highway robbers or al
lowed the children to grow up in ignorance
He can be safely relied on to do all the pub
lie robbing himself, but if he educates the
rising generation his trips abroad, which
first put the free-school idea into his head
should be encouraged
ATFy. Z. SWEET.
A Brave Little Boy.
l.