St. Landry democrat. (Opelousas, La.) 1878-1894, 1889-02-09
The ARIZONA KICKER.
Lively Editorial Freezes from the Far ar
lnpnl!uted West.

SUSPENDED. Wy it'll this issue we sus-
pend the agricultural department, ~
tabiished five months ago. We inL =
tuted this feature as an experim3k
and to help out q literary tenders y
from the East, who was barcelona
and penniless, but who was fertile VI
suggestions. The experiment was X
failure The aforesaid /. tt. 81
drunk most of the time, and W kn
sober he didn't know a cactus fro, III
wild lemon. The most valuable Sk
oesti0n made by him was that DE
farmers of Arizona drink less oatsaEd
SOW more whisky. We have bidshn
the tenderfOOt permanent and I;bt-
ing adieu, and we now bid arewelr to
agriculture as a set thing. We shalt
occasionally refer to the subject in
reckless, o1f-hand way, taking chances
on results, but there will be no further
studied attempt to make the sandy
plains get up and hump themselves
into fields of waving corn, and we
shan't cover the rocky hilIsides here
about with vineyards or patches Of de-
ceptive buckwheat, Goodbye, ten
derfoot-good-bye, agriculture!
Go EAsY.-We warn those meddc-
some citizens who are charging u9
with political treachery to 90 easy. 1t
is true that the Kicker has been Demo
cratic at times, and that we have oc-
casionally had a good word for the
Republican ticket, and that we have at
intervals seemed to be red-hot for pro-
hibition, but we were sort OF feeling
around to see what kind of a paper our
subscribers preferred. We didn't pro-
pose to brea8ourselves in two in the
first six months by getting left. We
had Democratic and a Republican
rooster ready for the election returns,
and we didn't care q cent which way
the old kangaroo jumped. We shall
now be a little more Republican than
| Democratic, as we want the county
| printing, but whenever we say any
thing distastcful to the Democracy we
| will, as soon as the matter IS called
to our attention, turn about and give
Harrison a wipe in the next ISSUE
We shall be Independent in nothing
and neutral in lots of things, hoping
that the Democrats will get there next
time and advising the Republicans to
hang on if it takes a rib we are
heavy on the political principles OF
our forefathers, but we have run on =
circulation up to 1913 copies, and we
don't propose to hit any of our SUP
scribers between the eyes to tickle any
partisan. Il
NOTICE TO CONTRIBUTORS. we can
not return rejected manuscripts IL
not accompanied by stamps we use
them to light the Office fire. 1t stamps
are sent we use them on our ousifle7a
letters. If the author OF "oeFe'i
Buckets of Blood, or the Cork-Scre" :
Revenge" will send her address 10 'l''
Office she will hear of something 70
her advantage. We have received
sketch entitled "Bobtailed BOD, or
the Bcbbers of Bobber's HILL when
we will publish on receipt Oh Tue
authors check for fifty dollars. we
must respectfully decline the storle
entitled: "Her Father Booted Me- ans
can Adventure With Indians IN
France" They seem to have an IN
moral tone. Contributors shoulu a.,
WAYS send in their right Names no''oi
publication, but in order that none u
our thousand checks shall 60 10 'hF
wrong person.
STEADILY IMPRovING.-Since our
last issue Colonel Fairbanks has mao
three rods of beautiful picket lence
erected in front of his adobe, anu 'n'
Gem saloon has received three p"' ~, 1,'
of whisky and q new pier-glass. W.
chronicle these Improvements al Nv
boastful spirit, but simpl y tha' ou.,
siders may know that the spifiC ~ "
progress is not dead within US
are going right to the front as a 10" L.
ACCIDENT. We regret to learn 'l'''
Major Jackson, one of the piol,e'' ~,
idents of our little city, kicked a' ~.
dog last Saturday and drove his U's
toe back into his heel by h'ttlhg w
corner stone of the new Masonic le'i'
pie. The Major was our Seeol. 49,, @,',
scriber, and he never meets Us VIII, .,.;a,
asking us to drink. We SymPab'il"|
with him in his dark hour OF trla'' ar -,
trust that he may soon reap
among US. Should his cond!eion
come critical we shall issue da'iy
tins from this office. 49,
Go HENCE. "A correspondent -" '''!
us to explain the meaning OF sno ,e'm
"From Alpha to Omega. we S'"n
do it We have had politlc' e.,o" >,
for one season. and propose 10 ~ "
on the machine. We never ll,af" :.
Alpha, anyhow, and as for ola o'hoS"
L . Ia, ,,lt - {JgkrOL IfC- fe"'