Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1889-07-28
TOO CRANK.
A TALE OF BAR HARBOR WITH A THRILL
ING CLIMAX
She Couldn't Say "NO" to Harry Even to Avoid a
CaPsize. Moral Young Man, Never Pro-
pose Unless You're Safe on Shore.

CapSlza. Moral: Young Man, Nsver Pro-
pose Unless You're Safe on Shore.
Marley H. Pike, in Puck.
place, Bar Harbor Time, 'the living present"
Persons, Miss Maud Lowell and M. Harry
spooner, in the latter's canoe, half a mile or
SO from shore. Maud is full of carefully con-
cealed fears OF a spill; Harry, of perfectly pat
tient alteration Of her.:
Maud (apprehensively) Have you ever
been capsized.
Harry without reflection )-Oh, Yes:
lots Of times. (Bethinking to himself)-
That is, mean never; or, at least, not
when had passengers.
Maud-Didn't You cay Just now that
this is the first time you've asked anyone
to 90 out with you?
Harry (heedlessly ardent -Indeed, yes!
l have always preferred being alone until
until now.
Maud Gathering to the point Then you
have never had any passengersP
Harry-N.no.
Maud lin a Q. E. D. tone)-Ah, 1
thought SOL
Harry thinking opportunity favorable)
What need you fear when with me
when with one who would gladly give his
life
Maud aside oh, dear. oh dear, oh,
dear He's going to speak And of alI
the places in the world, in this hOrrid,
webbing thing that, the least lurch may
turn bottom side up! One might as well
make declaration on tight rope over the
Niagara falls!
Harry-I fear you will think me pre-
sumptuous-
Maud (aside) NO, not at all: but so
dreadful fidgety! Why can't he propose
quietly? Every time he clasps his hands
in that sgonized way, we only just miss
going over.
Hlrry-But if you knew my suffer
ing!
Maud (aside)-And if you knew minel
Oh. how he makes us rock when be sighsl
Harry growing desperate)-And you
ait there
Maud aside)-It's all can do, though
when you bounce about So
Harry (wildly)-Calm, cool uncon-
cerned-
Maud ide)-Anything but that.
Harry-Motionlses-
Maud aside One of us must be, if we
hope to see land again.
Harry Sinking down I almost lose
hope.
Maud (aside)-And you'll completely
loss your balance, if you don't mind.
Harry lin great excitement)-But new
thelees I'll risk my happiness
Maud (aside)-Aud our lives! Good
nesel We took in bucketful that time!
Hsrry-And if you love nae?
Maud aside oh, what shall do? III
I say Yes" las 1 always intended), he'll
instantly eieze me in his arms, and then
souse we 90 into the wafer. And l really
save capsise, hut
Harry (dispsiringly throwing himself
back Mo answer
Maud (aside)-Oh! All! But ne
mustn't be permitted to do that again.
It's miracle that we're still above water.
I'll temporize -hesitate-coquette
-lie--anythipg, anything to keep him
quiet and this wretched craft right side
up until we can get ashore again (Aloud)
Mr. Spooner-
Harry Violently starting up)-DOn't
call me that
Maud neutrality-suspicious. or
speeck-eeems to agitate him; and worse,
makes him agitate the canoe. ALOUD
Well, Harry, then!
Harry (much excited)-She calls me
Harry!
Maud aside)-I certainly won't sgain,
if it causes such plunges as that. thought
we we're gonel (Aloud.) This is so sud-
den-so unexpected, that l hardly know
what 70 say. We are both very young
Harry half rises to his feet in pro-
test.
Maud aside And doomed to die 60, it
looks 10 me- He'll be through the bot
tom, indeed he will! aloud scsrc-
ly feel that L
Harry Gearing his hair)-She's going to
refose!
Maud (aside)--Not in case that is q
specimen of the way you'd receive the an
nouncement. How passionate he is, and
how he does thrash arOundl No girl who
couldn't saim would be likely TO refuse
him-until she got on shore. Aloud.
You misunderstood me, DIR. Sp-Harry.
Harry (demonstrstively Then yon &C
cspt me?
Maud (aeide)-Mercy on me! Do all
his emotions take the form OF spssms?
(AIoud.) Plesse paddle back to the pier;
and, on the way, will consider my an
swar.
Harry (glcomily)-ye we'll. Paddles
in silence
Maud (aside)-Pm saved Evidently
the feeling of suspense is the sole one tina.
doesn't react upon his muscular syetem.
Half way in, already. Poor boy, how an1-
icus he looks! He fears I'll throw him
over. when it's only that want to pre-
vent his doing the same to me. Bot few
rods more. Suppose l speak? One little
word would entirely reverse his feeling
veg. and the canoe likewise. No, I'll wait!
Twenty yards-fifteen-ten-snd here we
are. Not soul in sight, either!
Harry assists her ashore, following him
Maud (aside) Thank the stare! Now
he NAV be as convulsive as he likes.
aloud Well, ye'es, Harry-dear Har-
Harry (somewhat later Do you know,
darling, that by your conduct in the
canoe you quite upset me?
Maud very teuderly Yes, but you
don't know how often you almost upset
me, dear!