davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02

Great States Yes, my son, I wish
Won 10 rise TO the highest place within
the gift Of the nation Keep this aim in
view always, and never neglect an OF :
portunity to advance yourself" Ambi-
tious Boy don't neglect ar opportU-
nifty, father. Every day l read the pro-
ceedings Of Congress, and every night /
go out and kick a Chinaman.n
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02

I have been troubled with catarrh OF
the head and throat for the last FIVE years.
About three years ago commenced the
use Of Ely's Cream Balm, ard from the
first application I was relieved. The
sense Of smell, which had been lost, was
restored after using n bottle. / have
found the Balm che only satisfactory
remedy for eatarrh, and it has effected a
cure in my case.-H l.. Meyer, Wayerly,
y
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
The Population OF Somerset

Is about two thousand, and we would
say at least one-halfa are troubled with
ONE affection Of the Throat and Lungs,
a. those complaints are, according to STA
~tistics, more numerous than others. We
would advise all not to neglect theoppor-
tunity to call on their druggist and get a
bottle Of RemPs Balsam for the Throat
and Lungs. Price 30 cents and 81 90,
Iriai SO free. For sale by all leading
druggists.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
Answer this Question.

Why do 50 many people we see around
US seem 10 prefer TO suffer aad be made
miserable by Indigestion, Constipation,
Dizziness, Loss Of appetite, Coming up
of the Food, Yellow skin, when for -
cents We viii sell them Shiloh's System
Nitalizer, guaranteed to cure them. Sold
by Geo. W. Bentord & Son.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
Address
The New York Press Co., Limited.


T~ATARHR.-Prof. c. 3. Cook. PIin
- ciral High school. ct Be7ld. IA, formally 81
Somerset county Ia. ssy. - MATTERS REMEDY
FoE CArAEFH, Its me best p%niiiaier i0r Ca
tarrh ] ever tricd. Il is the bosf caiarTh cire I
ever tried il Is the Simplest and easiest 90 U.s. %
anything ! ever tried. II ANY fi.nd % mine
should read this. ! wish Aimt 10 Understand that
.ay with al sincerity that ! am acquainted with
Mr.. ]. 81. gray, enc az Tie pneprirtou of Nstures
Remedy for Catarrh. lie l. an upright honorable
gentleman, and his medicine Is the best caiarrh
believe Is viii cane any person suffering from
mtarrh."
II = sold by druggists and dealers Il may be
sent ~ uiail price 81. EYegs package contains a
hll gnarier lound 81 medicine. send for oar
hsak l6mo. - p.1 entitled How b cure GatsrTh -
Address. ]. N. GRAY Co, RUSH, susQCERtNNA
COUNTY Pa.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
Too LiveIyf or the Flies.

Augustus Treadwell amusing himself
with Willie BY while waiting FOR his
sisier}-Does your mother eve take you
in hand, Willie?
Willie Bly-Yes, one hand. There amt
any dies on the other hand, though, you
bet.-BarliagtoH Free Pres.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02

"sfscr using ia bot
ties q Paine Celery
Compound. ] am cured
q r~icumasism.
SAMUEL HUTCHINSON,
South Cornish, n. H.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02

'Paine's Celery Com
pound has been q grcat
beneff for torpid liver,
indigestion. and bilious
ness. ELIzAEzTH T..
lpALL. Onechee. VI.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02

The circumference Of the neck and the
calf Of the leg are the same. The circum-
ference Of the neck equals twice the cir
conference Of the wrist. Three times the
circumference OF The head equals the en-
ire ZENITH ofthe holy.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
REC4VSEa

HC Eh Is printing those ne
III CbE markab'e articles on "S-
IBERIA and the Exile system. by GeoTrc KEENAN,.
which arc attracting universal atteutiou and are
being reprinted in hundreds Of foreign uewsta-
pers. but ap Hut ailuWed 70 enter Russia. The
lhioUg3 i1a1ts says that " ut other magazine ar
tlcles printed 10 the English language Just now
touch upon a subject which 50 vitality Interests all
Thoughtful people ia Europe and America and
Asia They arc "as judicial Is the opinion Of u
supreme Court tribunal, IA thrilling rs the most
sensational drama.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
- l.9 .. -

during 1879 ~ oe'a9
craving OF the greatest pictures OF the old Italian
masters. made hy Timothy Cole. the leading
wool engraver of The world, who has spent four
wears in italy on this work q series of Strange
True Stories % louisiana. hy George ". Cable
occasional richly illustrated pIpeTS describing the
scenes Of the current International Snndav-srhool
lessons interesting illustrated psIers on ireland
and a SeTics OF humorous and pathetic Irish Amer
jean stories = striking illustrated novelettes.
The Romance % Doiari, by a new writer. and
other novelette, % be announced later supple
mental war papers. uutechnicHl and descriptive
of special Incidents Pictures Of the Far Vest
by Mary HallOcS Fo0te, etc. etc. We have not
SPACE here 20 announce all the new features. let
rs send YOU free our Catalogue Of Special Publ.
cations, with original Illustrations. containing
fun prospectus. special offer OF back numbers 10
beginning Of the Siberian papers, etc. The Now
vember number, which begins the new volume.
Is for sale everywhere after Nov. Ist. The cntary
costs ) cents = number; 800 a year. Address
THE CENTURY COMPANY,
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02

The Nep York Press nov q National
Newspaper, rapidly growing IN favor with
Republicans Of every State Ia the Union.
Cheap news, velgar sensaiions, and trash
find no place ia the columnsoI iae Pfess u
Il Is an expensive paper, published 1t The
lowest price American currency permits
The Daaa PrcsS has the brightest editorial
page in New York. II s~eareies ~ili points
The Saasaag Pres isa splendid i page pa
per. covering every current topic 81 intere>t.
The Weckis IrfzS contains all the good
Things OF the Daily and Sunday editions,
with special features suited t0a Weekly pub
lcation. For those who cannot aiiara Iae
Dqflg Press ur arr prevented iy distance from
early receiving II, TIE Hceag fres l. a splen-
did substitute
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
TIE PRESS

Hlflin the roaol II az Bot AID a,cIpcf
gelrspaper published ha A1eriet
Daily and sunday Press. one wear. -.-.--H %
six qonths---.-- . -
one manth--.---- 90
Weekly Pres, one J %
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02

An old shoe horn is Of stained ivory,
with a silver handle twisted rope FASH
ion.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
Salt Rheum

Is cneoffhe most disagreeall e diseases caused
impure blood. II is readily cured by Hoods
aarsparilla, The great blood purifier.
William spies, Eyria, o, suffered greatly
fr1Ia erys.pelas ard salt lheum, caused by
l1alimg iphacco. Al times his hands would
crack open andbleed. lie tried various prep
arlfions without aid; faailv took nooi's Sar-
szpariila, and now SAYS; Ian entirely wen"
"Sy sra had salI fhean on his hands and
On the calves Of his legs. lie took Hoods
sarsapauila and IS entirely cured" j. z
Stanton, ~ Vernon. Ohio.
Hoods ~SarsapariIIa
sod ty al druggists, 81 sn Tor Made only
b CT ROOD CO. AIothesaries, lowell Mas
100 Doses One Dollar
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
. DEMONSTRATORS NOTICE.

Estate Of joss pn. Mosgraye. deed late Of stony
creek Township somerset Cnuaiy. Pa.
Letters ofadminiStrion on the above estate hav-
ing been granted 10 the undersigned by the prof-
er authority. notice j. hereby given 60 an persons
indebted 70 said estate % make immediate pty-
nent- and those having claims Or demands
against the same viii present them dslv authou-
Heated for settlement on saturday. the 18Th day
Of Janusry. 1879. at the Office u j. o. KimmeL. ia
Somerset Boroagh.
JONATHAN GUsfHERT.
decl2- administrators.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02

Elss Cream BAm cured NE ofcafarfh
and restored my sense Of smeIl. For cold
n head it works ike magic. Z II. sher-
wook, Banker, Elizabeth, n. J.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
CURE


j. the hane % SO many lives that herr is where
we make our great boast. Our pils cure u
while others DO not
CARrrts FarrLE LIVER Puts are very small
ard very eass o. take one or two pslz inake
g dose. Theg are strictly vegetable and do
nos grippe or purge. bat IS their gentle action
plaa-e an who NE them, In yials at p CENTS;
five for 81. sold everywhere. or seIt by nAall-
css1z2 yE-lsrfE 60, New ZaE
snY fl Snail SrA Snail sTa
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02

LOCKWOOD ACcoMHoDATIoN-No. 81
LoercZ 4vfrcs
SOMERSET ....--.2ff p m lockwood ....-243 . m
Allford-------2;Hl m
Passengers leaving on This rain can make con
nection al lockwood with night Express trains
east ana west.
. Daily. Daily except Sunday.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
A pMINIsrgAroR,s NOTICE.

Estate Of John r. McGrcg0r. decd. late Of shade
Township, somerset County Pa
Letters Of Administration on the atovc estate
having been granted 10 the undersigned by the
proper authority, notice Is hereby given 10 all
persons indebted 10 sfid estate 20 make immodi-
ate payment. and those having claims against
the sane viii present them duly authenticate
for settlement on or before January Il, Iss9. ~
myresidencc ia shade Township
JACOB Mc5REfOR.
dec5. administrator
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
cAUTIoS NOTICE.

Ny soa william Eiouch having les my house
and taken himself from ansler my control all per-
som are asrehy notified not to harboro or trust hifa
on my ascanns. asl vllHot be responsible for
any debts he may contract
SAMUEL G. BLOUGH,
Bolsapple, Dee. y. ISIS.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
Beware of Scrofuia

scroin'a is probably more general than asy
other disease. Il is insidious in character,
and maniiesis itself in running sores, pustular
cruTtions. boilS, swcliings. enlarged joints,
aascesses. sore eyes. etc. Hoods arsapaEiila
czpels al trace Of scrofuia from the blood
leaving it pure. enriched. ard healthy.
"Iwas severely AFFECTED with s%-rofuia, and
over earhadtw Drumming sores oamy neck.
Took Eve bottles Hoods S~arsapariila. and am
cue1.1 c. Z LoyEJoV. Lowell, Mass.
c A. Arnold. Arnold. Me-, had sernngions
sores for scvcn wears. spring and fal. Hoods
sarsaparli.A cured him.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02

The mystery is Gods the promise is
yours.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
shiloh's catarrh Remedy.

shiloh's estarrh Remedy, a marvellous
cure for Catarrh, DipLtheria, Canker
Mouth, and Headache. With each bot
lie there is N ingenious Nasal Injector
for the nor successful treatment Of
these complaints without extra charge.
Price 30 cents. Soil By George W. Ben
ford & Son.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02

When You rise in the morning form the
resolution to make the day a happy one
% Il fellow creature.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
The Homeliest Man

In Somerset, as well as the handsomest
and others, are invited 10 call ON any
druggist and get free a trial bottle Of
Kemp's Balsam for the Lungs, 4 remedy
that IS selling entirely upon its merits
and IS guaranteed to cure and relieve all
Chronic and Acute Coughs, Asthma,
Bronchitis and Consumption. Price 80
cents and 81.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
THE
NEW YORK PRESS
FOR 1sSo-
DAILY. SUNDAY. WEEKLY.
The Aggressive Republican Journal
Of tho Metropolis.
ANEwsPApER FOR THE MASSES
FouSpED D1cSxnrn J, s..
Circulation. November i. IS lo7,iW
:. So. 254.s49
ANEwspApER FOR THE MASSES
Largest Circulation Of any Repub-
iican Paper In America,

sTHE Pass IS the organ afno faction pulls
no wires has no arimosities 10 avense.
The most RsmarkaAs Nssrspaper Saocsss IN
Inl.rie.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02

SOMERSET AocoMMoDATIoy-No s.. :

Passengers from Pittsburgh change cars for
points ON the Somerset q Cambria at Lockwood.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
SoUTH-BouND TRIMS.

on the Pittsburgh Division, change ears at Rock
wood. .
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02

silence is the highest wisdom Of a
fool.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
Marie Becomes Personal.

"Your prejudice tobacco. Marie,
observed Mr.. Biilus, lighting his pipe, Is
unreasonable. God made tobacco"
ale made a certain animal, too" said
Mrs. Billus, sharply, opening the doors
snd raising the windows, and aiterward.
according 70 Moses. pronounced it IN
clean, Mr.. Billus.'-Gte1go Tribune.
4 necklace Of human knGckleboEe;
was the gift received BY a missionary
from a partial chief
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
His Plea

Use the surest remedy for catarrh-Dr
Sage's.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02

" En1HS EIit Is publishing the life
III OPA o! Abraham Lincoln. by
his pTivafc.secreiarics ofthis IL has been said.
1.-THE young man who Is not reading it uts him
selfo OF that which he viii one day hunger FOR.
The coming year presents the most important
part fths great history. which may te begun AT
any time
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
RAILROAD TIME TABLES.
BALTIMORE e. OHIO R~ATLR0AD.-
s0MERSET6 C1MBRIA BRANCH
SoR7H-BouSD TRAINS.

winter arrangement In saee, Nov. %, IS
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
BALTIMORE MAILING. o. +
AccoMNoDAT1ox-No. 81. :

Passengers for east and wess change cars at
lockwood.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02

The more fashionable the woman the
smaller is her hustle.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02

THE SEMI-vvEESLT INTER OCEAN.
Demolished n MONDA Ks and THURSDAYS. and teadesh ouwsr condensed from no
Daily tcontausln many especial features of great EeU to hose s1auartu1f uHro not
secure e D1lyewyd day. The Monday issue contains fac sermons nu-a4l ia rae Daily
inter- Ocean OF thu "a date.
THE WEEKLY INTER OCEAN
Ine Host opuIar Family Newspaper published West the ifrEhauF -ount-
aims owes its opaAayu the fact haiti istho BEsT EDITED an4 lasUe U1DH-
BRIGHT. ani the able ezponsato Of IDEAS and PRINCIPLES tearto tie NueacaH
people. While it il broad uhs philanthropy IL IS FORANE.ICAA AGAINST TnE
WORLD md buadly claims that the best service that can be Aonc FOR MfNNiNDIS
TO INcREA sE AND Nj AXE PERM ANENT TIE PROSPERITY OF OTE GREAT
REPUBLIC. Conscientious service in utsp patriotic line Of duty has eui tan rnusual
hold upont the AnecanD people Bsade%no paDereN ehs Hasa mssmtnatoro aaWs.
II MARKET REPORTS AXE RELIABLE AND COMPLETE. THE.
NEWS OF THE WORLD Is found condemned in its columns, aus the very best
in its columns Anouz the special family famrs are the deparmeat-THE
FARM AND HOME. WOHNN> KINGDOM and otRCUBIosfrN SHOE Onh
whos it is a MODEL AMERICAN NEWSPAPER and richly deserves uhatti has
THE LARGEST REGULATION Of my utilization Of the kind in America. Hises
betpaDsr fort the home and for he workshop
The price Of The Weeky 500 eryear
The price II The Sen-Weeky peryezr
Forue accommodation Of patrons the maa2senent Of ~ II m fEiN has
mad arrangements to club both these editions with THAT BSILLIASr AND sue
CESSFUL PUBLICATION.
SCRIBNER'S MAGAZINE.
One of tn best Leray MDmnes in America ani which compares volbF win NY o.
the odsr Mgl1nes in Illustrations and literary matter TIL PRICE or THE HAGA-
I'M Is . but we viii send I'll WEEKLY INTER OCEAN M sCEIBSEK5
MACHINE both syar Tor THREE DOLLARS Both raelcaons ar ne pws
of os. THE sENuHTEEKLY INTER OCEAN aai sCRIBNEssS MAGlZINL.
both one year for FOUR DOLLARS
In the political campln that ended IN the election II HARRISON and 1tortrOS
and THE TRIUMPH OF Projection PRINCIPLES paper hal more Influence
than III INTEROCEAN. Hhasbwn first last ans always Republican a1i da-ur
the campdgn team tbs recognized asme IL aOTNG REPUBLICSNPt rROFTHE
WEST. twill maintain this Dosidon, aud vH give special attention 10 goNrmeuaiABd
political Affairs
RamnHanoes may be made at rh risk iherby dEn. express Pooaee oraeEepS1
orders. or registered letter ADDRESS
THE INTER OCEAN. Chicago.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1889-01-02
THE CENTURY COMPANY.

50 E.sr l7ru STREET. NEW Yonk.
Butler citizen. [volume] (Butler, Pa.) 1877-1922, 1889-11-29
How $4,000 Pounds was Made
a Horse Power.

When men begin first to become famil-
lar with the methods of measuring mechan-
ical power, they often speculate on where
the breed of horses is to be found which
can keep ut work raising 80, 900 pounds
one foot per minute, or the equivalent,
which is familiar to men accustomed to
pile driving by horse power, 33O pounds
100 feet per minute. Since 5000 pounds
raised one foot per minute is called one
horse power, it is natural for people to
think that the engineers who establish
that unit of measurement based it on the
actual work performed by horses But
that was not the case. The horse power
unit was established by James Watt about
q century ago, and the figures were settled
in curious way. Watt, in his usual care
inl manner, proceeded to find out the aver
age work which tho h0rses Of his district
cauld perform, and he found that the rails
ing OF 80, vvv pounds one foot per minute
was about the actual horse power. At
this time he was employed in the manu-
facture of engines, and had almost a mo-
nopoly of the engine building trade. Gus
TONERS werelso hard to find that all kinds
of artificial encouragements We're consid
ersd necessary 80 induce power users to
hny steam engines. As method of en-
couraging business, Watt offered to sell
engines reckoning 80, 900 foot pounds to a
horse power, or one third more than the
actual. And thus. says the NanWactw-
er's Gazette, what was the temporary ex-
pedient to promote business has been the
means of giving false unit of very i'm
portant measurement TO the world.
Butler citizen. [volume] (Butler, Pa.) 1877-1922, 1889-11-29
Song OF Ye Olde Pedagogue.

Twas jolly old pedagegue, long ago,
Tall and slender, and sallow and dry
His form was bent and his gait was slow,
And his long thin hair was white as snow,
But wonderful twinkle shone in his eye;
And he sang every night as he went to bed.
''Let us be happy down here below;
The living should live though the dead
be dead"
Said the jolly old pedagoguc. long ago.
-4acienf PoMe
Delay always induces ultimate trouble
and especially il this true in its applica-
ton TO the human system. Laxador saves
time and trouble by prompt use IN the
beginning Of sickness.
If your baby Is sick, suffering and cry
ing with pain OF cutting teeth, soothe u
with Dr. Bulls Baby Syrup. IL Is safe
Price 25 cents.
A prominent member of the ancient
and aristocratic family Of Dupont, OF pow
der making fame, has seandalized his ma
tive State by marrying Queenstown bar
maid noted for her beauty. Her name was
Margaret Fitzgerald, Familiarity called
"Tottie," and the young man became
enamored while on tour with relatives
and took her from the tavern TO marry her.
He is possessed Of q large fortune.
-Mother-Get up Johnny. fou are
sitting ON my new bonnet what ars you
laughing att
Johnny (rising)-Thsre is nothing new
under the son.
Butler citizen. [volume] (Butler, Pa.) 1877-1922, 1889-11-29
Why Some Mills Fall.

The two chief causes of failure in -four
mills at the present day are bad Office man
agement aud wasteful milling. The manu-
faetnre of -four il in different conditions
from what ii was ten or twelve years ago.
Then man Of small ability and limited
experience could run mill with consider
able profit. But those times are, believe.
gone forever.
Sometimes a mill started in prohtably
comes to turning point and begins to lose
money. When this is the case. it will not
avail to curse the timcs and the 1uctua-
tions of the times The thing to be done
is, by means of frequent balance sheets in
the office and frequent tests in the mill, to
ferret out the true cause, and then to apply
the remedy This may involve the dis
charge of trusted wheat buyer, manager,
or head manager, but it is the only thing
that will save the enterprise from ship
wreck.
One of the gravest mistakes that can be
made in milling and one that has more
than once come under my observation, il
that of changing, for the sake of a small
apparent saving to poorer grado of
wheat Let mill build up by steady ad-
herence to high standard Of product a
profitable home demand amounting. we
will say, to hundred barrels daily. Then
let that mill begin to use inferior wheat,
putting the product out under the same
successful brand, and in thirty days its
flourishing trade will be knocked endwise
Just to save three or four cents a bushel
on wheat
But this saving on wheat, l can show, is
not actual. We will take 5000 bushel
lot of good wheat, mill it into -four, and
calculate the yield. Next we will take
6, 900 bushels of poor wheat and treat them
in like manner. Comparing results We
shall find, am confident, that the first lot
has yielded not only more barrels of -four,
but a greater percentage ofhigh grade than
the second. scarcely need add that sue
cessful milling to-day hangs on high grade
percentage.
Another important matter, often over
looked by millers, is the proportion of loss
or waste to each barrel OF -four. There
are mills in which the total waste averages
as high as four pounds TO every barrel of
-four manufactured, while others there are
where it is kept down to one and hsif
Four pounds seem to me a good deal, yet
some millers habitually allow for that aver
age of loss without special test. Others
mill as though there were no such thing as
waste or loss.
There is no skill or cunning 30 great that
it can for any long period foist poor
quality of -four upon the market without
detection and loss. The public may be
fooled for time, but sooner or later they
will note the difFnrnron "ra nunish the de-
ceit.-Roller NIL.
Butler citizen. [volume] (Butler, Pa.) 1877-1922, 1889-11-29
Progressive Theology.

A certain evangelist in Western Virginia
organized Sunday School, and by dint of
diplomacy obtained a good following of
youngsters into whose uncomhed heads
and plant hearts he instilled the rudiments
OF religion. Neither did he spare the cor
rectiye rod in case his charge failed to
come to taw with the catechIsm
One Sunday q new arrival was discover
ed over in the boys corner He was call
cd down before the teacher and cross. ex-
amined with view to learning his religious
requirement.
"How many gods arc there'" asked the
teacher,
The boy thought moment and ventursd
the assertion that there were two
"Wrongw said the teacher
Three
"0h! you must know better that that
try again. "How many gods are theref"
"Four?' whimpered the boy.
Wrong again" shouted the ipstractor
~ will give you one more chance. II ynn
don't snswer right this time I'll tan you.
Now. for the last tune how many gods are
theref'
'Fivew walled the unhappy tow head.
Smack! The teacher gave him thorough
dressing down and sent him from the
room in digrace. A belated scholar found
him sitting by the roadside bowling at the
top of his voice.
What's tha ni-tser, Jackf"
.'4eacher licked me"
"What fort"
"Cause didn't know how many gods
there were"
"Huh! that's easy enough"
"D'you know"
| "Coarss."
How many are thereY'
lone, you stupid"
Gone, ehl Well. you just 60 in there 6
with your little one god and you'll catch
it. 'lowedthere was five, and he nigh
killed me. Washington Post"