The prison mirror. [volume] (Stillwater, Minn.) 1887-1894, 1889-07-11
Choosing Between Duties.

Choosing Between Duties.
There is no more perpleXing problem
than that presented when an apparent duty
comes in conflict with ones kindly feelings
and desire to help an unfortunate person.
particularly when the latter is close friend
or relative. There are some who pride
themselves upon being so just that when
friends or dear relatives are in the wrong
they can oppose or thwalt them; who. in
the interest of truth, will expose their fail
ngs. give warning as to their faults. and
generally act, not as friends, but very like
enemies. In contrast with such people may
be set of the class of Simon Cameron, to
whom is ascribed the saying: Amy man
will stand by you when you are right: it is
only friend who will stand by you when
you are wrong" Both classes may be set
down as extremists, each with a germ of
truth upon which to found false rule of
conduct. The one eXaggeiates his duty to
the general public as against his friend in
the endeavOr to be just. or to be considered
just; the other eXaggerates the duties Of
friendship. ignoring his duties to the gen
eral public. 1t is true that the duties of
love and friendship are paramount, but
they can best be observed by trying to cor
rect the friend who is wrong, and endeavOr-
ing to protect him from such consequences
of his wrong as might prevent his refOrma-
ton. Such course may require a iudcOus
silence AS to faults and shortcomings, apollo
geS and efforts to put the best possible face
on circumstances or actions that cannot be
defended rather than such frank admissions
as the man who prdes himself upon being
just is supposed to make. The duties that
press upon men in their social life are many
and sometimes conflicting. Thus if a man
happens to learn that another perhaps his
friend, has been dishonest and is now in a
position of trust where continued dishonesty
may do great harm to other innocent people.
it is his duty to give warning to the latter.
But if he has hopes that his friend may be
reclaimed it is just as clearly his duty to do
all in his power to effect a reform and keep
his friend from falling into confirmed evil
ways. II he should utter the cry of warn
ing for the benefit of the general public the
inevitable consequence would be to blast
his friends reputation and perhaps drive
him into practices from which he should be
saved. Ii, on the other hand he should re-
main silent and give negative support to
his friend by association he might promote
the wrongs to others which he is bound to
avert if it is within his power The situa-
ton is one OF great perpleXity, for which
there can be no fixed rule and guide But
it may be laid down as safe principle that
vague general duties should never outweigh
special duty arising from friendship or
other close relation, and that no mans rep
utatiOn should be assailed except upon the
plainest grounds of necessity. Where there
are opposing duties the benefit of the doubt
should always be given to those closest and
nearest to US, especially in cases where
there is possibility OF promoting reform
and redeeming friend who is going wrong.
Quite apart from cases involving serious in
jury or crime are those where one becomes
cOgniZant OF the growing bad habits of a
friend or acquaintance, as. for example,
where one happens to know a trusted clerk
who is beginning to drink and keep fast
company. The ultra just might consider it
duty to warn the young mans employers
from loss. But such course might wreck
his life by mere suspicion. The just and
fair thing to do by all concerned would be
to call the young man to one side. warn him
OF his danger, and frankly explain to him
that if he should continue in his evil WAYS
the other duty Of giving warning would
have to be fulfilled. BY that means a re-
form might be effected without scandal or
injury to any one. Whatever the course to
be adopted, however. all duties should be
considered and weighed. and no action
taken coldly from sense of public duty
alone. nor blindly because of personal
friendship. -BaltimOre Weekly Sun.
a lon,