The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1889-05-04
THE MAN ABOUT TOWN.
He had gone TO Oklohoma,
And lie didn't take u gun,
So he missed his quarter section,
And his bones bleach In the sun.


A good story is told as to the way in
which tricky landlord who was keeping
hotel at an early day in Illinois on stage
line between 81. Louis and Indianapolis
was 'come up with" 1t appears when
the stage stopped al this particular hotel to
change horses as we'll as drivers, that just
about the time the hungry and tired pass
engers were we'll seated at the table,
which was always nicely set with the best
Of china and silverware and loaded down
with the best the house afforded, for which
one dollar head was charged and invariass
bly, collected as soon as the guests We're
seated at the table, and by the time they
had tasted their coffee, the stage horn
would sound, and the unwelcome shout Of
"all-a-board" from the driver would greet
their ears, and they would have to resume
their journey without having half finished
their meal. II Sd happened that long
raw boned Missouran by the name of
Bezekish Spaulding, known at home as
Hez, was going East, and was thus cheated
out of his dinner at this place by the usual
Method-which he subsequently learned
was always In vogue there. Hez said but
little, but, as he afterwards expressed II, he
did powerful sight of thinkin." 1t so
happened that about six weeks later our
friend Hez. returned that way and with six
other passengers stopped at this same hotel
for breakfast. The table, as usual, was
loaded with the best and most tempting
victuals, all placed on the table as was the
custom ut that time. The seven hungry
passengers eagerly took seats at tempting
board, and paid their dollar each, and were
just beginning to do ample justic to the
ham and egg, hot biscuits and butter, and
coffee, when the stage horn sounded, and
the driver called "all-a-bsrd!' Up got
six hungry passengers and got in the stage
Hez. remained at the table deliberately
eating his breakfast; when again the dri
YER screamed, "all-a-board!' but HeZ
paid no attention TO anything but his meal,
1.-THE stage is going, you will be left" LET
her CO." was He's reply, and he continued
to stow away ham, eggs, biscuit, coffee,
&c, at a rate that astonished our host, who
stood looking on while our friend engaged
him in conversation as he deliberately
discussed the edlbles. mice country bout
here. Raise your own pork squire ?" as
he took another piece of ham as big as a
mans hand. "Reckon you find hotel
keepin' nice bizness, SQUIRE At last he
said, we'll, now, squire, just gimme bowl
of bread and milk 10 sorter top off with
and IL be much obliged" The landlord
went out and soon returned with the milk,
when Hez. said, "Spune, too, If you
please" The landlord looked around for
the spoons but none could be found. He
finally said, "Well, it's strange, | know
there was dozen solid silver table spoons
here when breakfast was called" HeZ
spoke up, "See here, SQUIRE do you reckon
those passengers was going to pay dollar
apiece and get nothing for it? ah! |
reckon not" "Did one of them take the
spoons" hastily enquired the hoste. 81
have nothing furder to say" observed Hez,
"Could you point out the one who has the
spoons? 2" said the landlord. "Well, now,
/ rickan | could, and that too, magnify
quick" Out rushed our host, puts man
onto a horse, and started him after the
stage, which he overhauled about four
miles out. He rode up and spoke a few
words to the driver in whisper; the
driver turned aroune and drove back 10 the
hotel, just at which time out stepped our
friend Hez., all smiles and said. Glow are
you, gentlemen, mighty glad to see YER"
as he stepped in the stage coach. "Now,"
said the landlord, ''just point out the one
who has the spoons" "See here, squire"
said Hez: THAT was a powerful fine
breakfast, and | reckon l got the worth Of
my dollar. Them spunes ale In the coffee
pot, Go ahead driver"
80
why are we, the citizens OF Illinois,
especially we who were born In Illinois,
called suckers?"
Just how frequently this question has
been asked me am unable to say, but 1t
has not been asked less than thousand,
and perhaps more. Until recently have
been unable to answer it, but from articles
in the Peoria Transcript and the Galesburg
Republican, Register, | now preceive that
the long sought for information has evi'
IDENTITY come to light.
The first settlements in the state were
made in the southwestern portion, where
the land was new and rich and yielded
abundantly with but little cultivation. ALI
was serene, but there was scarcity of
money and means of transportation TO the
markets were very meagre 1t became so
bad that copper cent was to the settler as
large as full moon, and was invaribly
placed in place of security for use in an
emergency. The wages paid at the lead