The National tribune., 1889-10-10
BOWSER wHITEwAsHEs.

Lime I'm His Eyes Makes Him Mad Clean Through.
lie Yells Like House Ailre and Blames his Wife.
[Dctrdit Fres Press.I
There were several little things wanted
done about the house this Fall, and so the
| other week. / engaged colored man to como
and wori.f .fex couple Of days. 1t 80 happened
that no came one morning before Mr.. Bowser
had left tho house, and was greeted withi
well, what's up uow2"
"Tze dun bin hired to work, ssh."
"Who hired your"
| ode lady, sah."
"Wkat to dor" '-
| "Jobbin', sah."
"Well, the lady has changed her mind and
doesn't want you" r.
After the man had gone Mr.. Bowser came
| into the house and asked
"Did you hire colored man2"
"Why, yes"
"What for2"
"I was going to have him whitewash the
vegetable collar, take down and clean the laun-
| dry stovepipe and do some other jobs"
HIM Mrs. Bowser, don't believe In en-
couraging such people. He'd have done about
one hours work and charged you for whole
day. i don't believe he knows any more about
whitewashing than do about playing the
harp"
"But he said he did"
Certainly. Did you ever see negro who
wouldn't say anything to fit the occasonP"
Well, but
"There is no but about IL. If there are any
| little jobs about the house Pve got plenty of
time to do them. In fact, need just such ex-
ercise. Such work is diversion for me, and
! the doctor recommends it,"
Do you mean to say you will do the white
washing9"
"I do don't do II to save dollar but for
| my own benefit. 1 always like the smell of
lime"
II wish you wouldn't do t. You'll get lime
In your eyes and you will blame me for 10,
and"
There you gol Blame you What would
blame you about7 If | get lime in my eyes it's
my own fault. Mrs. Bowser, you are getting
To be good deal Of crank lately"
Well, If you are determined on it, don't say
that asked you or encouraged you"
That's funny way to talk to me, Mrs.
Bowser! Are you getting ready for the insane
asylum? think run my own house yet If
I'm willing to peel off and do these odd Jobs
ought to bo encouraged instead of being in
suited"
j was quite sure how II would end, but said
nothing more, and in tho course of half an
hour he got into his old clothes and went down
cellar / followed him down to give him few
last words of vice, but he didn't need them.
You go right upstairs and sit down and
enjoy yourself" he said. Here's the brush
and here's "A pail of lime, and II don't white
wash more cellar in 10 minutes than Moses
could in all day. I'll never try it again. Be-
sides. Mrs. Bowscr whitewashing is not the
slouch work you imagine it to be 1t has got
to be- done by person Of taste and intelligence
or IL won't stand. l want little blueing TO
give 1t tnge"
=" YOu understand" / said, az ! got what he
wanted, that i did not ask you to do this
work"
Ask mel What on earth ails you, Mrs. Bow
ser2 You are making fuss enough over 10
minutes work to warrant years Job"
1t must be we'll done"
Certainly"
1.-TWO coats all around"
"Just So"
% Even IL ii takes you all dayp"
Even IL takes me over half an hour, which
IL won't. III show you n job here that will
| make black man turn green with envy. Just
run upstairs aud make yourself comfortable"
retreated up the stairs 70 tho kitchen door
and waited for results, which knew were sure
to come Mfr. Bowser dipped and dishod and
sozzled and stirred until hc had the liquid TO
his liking, and rs no began on the stone wall
heard him cbuckliug:
- / said l5 minutes. but I'll 20 slow and make
IL 90 The idea OF a colored man sloshing
around here all day to do this work. Let's see.
believe Ill take the overhead first"
held my breath IN suspense for long min
nte. Then yell arose from that cellar which
made her cry out:
"For Heavens sake Mrs. Bowser. have We
been struck by another cyclone?"
There was a second aud a third yell. and Rs
hurried downstairs Mr. Bowser stood In tho
middle of tho cellar, hands outstretched, and
jumping up and down as II he had fire under
his feet.
For heavens sake, what Is IL, Mr.. Bowser9"
/ asked.
"whitewash- --lime-nrel"
"Whereg"
"In my eyesl I'm blindl I've burned them
onti"
got hold of him and led him ont 10 the
laundry tubs and set the water TO running. He
had indeed got dose in his eyes, but it was
more painful than dangerous. lie could hardly
see daylight after w6 bad washed out ali the
lime, aud as led him upstairs he said:
- Hhall never see again-neyer see you or
the baby again ia my liiol'
washed his eyes with milk and got him 10
lie down on the lounge, and In couple of
hours he was pretty near all right. His eyes
were sore, but no great damage had boon DONE
lie was very gentle until he discovered this.
Then he suddenly turned OF mo with:
"Mrs. Bowser. what possible excuse can You
urge in extenuation Of your conduetl"
"What do you mean2"
"What do meanp That's cool question TO
ask me! In view Of what has transpired what
have you to say2"
81 say that you were foolish 10 undertake tho
Job. j warned you how 1t would turn out"
"Mrs Bowserl" he shouted, squirting tears Of
| lime. water out of his eyes. do you pretend to
deny that you didn't encourage mo TO under
take a task which you knew would put nv
whole future happiness, IL not my life, in
| peril?"
81 do, sir. did all / possibly could to dis
suade you"
"And you are not TO blame"
"Not in the least"
"And brought IL all on myself"
"You did"
Mrs. Bowser, this Is too mnch--too much
/ could forgive one who had wronged me, IL
1