Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1889-10-17
RUSSIAN IRREGULARITIES.

The Paid Public Joker-Guides Who Get
Drunk-C Choosing Wives-BarbaricS Spleen.
doris.
DR.. Barrett saw a great deal of the Rus
sian people.
Some funny things he observed among
them:
''Did you ever see a paid joker?" he
said ''Well, if you never did you would
be interested to watch one. There in
those Russian cities they pay so much an
hour to listen to the Joker. | have always
thought that this class of people deserve
some remuneration, but | never saw such
thing till I reached St. Petersburg
How do they work it?"
''Well, the joker provides himself with
two or three hundred tickets, and mount
ing a sort of rostum he announces that
he is going to regale his audience with
choice tidbits of mirth-provoking lore.
He begins by selling tickets at about 212
cents EACH and when he has sold enough tC
warrant his beginning, he turns himself
loose, and the audience remains spellbOunC
by his humorous stories for an hour OF
two.
II listened to them several times, an6
although | could not understand one worC
the joker said, | was sure from the way
the audience greeted these stories with
roars of laughter, that the joker and the
jokes were above the average.
Another curious thing about the Rus.
slams was the guides. Faithful and honest
to a rare degree, they will go with you all
day and half the night, never murmuring
nor complaining of the least fatigue
Several times | felt like paying the guide
more then he charged, simply because
felt that he had earned and deserved extra
compensation.
''But they get drunk.
mot fighting drunk, but sort of good
natured drunk They drink stuff with
queer name, that makes them mellow
drunk, and in a few hours they sober up
and do not seem to suffer from the effects
of it all. During these bibulous intervals
they meet each other with the most ELUSIVE
greetings. Men embrace and kiss each
other, and become unusually merry.
among the lower classes women are
not priced for their beauty. 1t is theT
strength. A lady of our party asked q
Russian guide if his wife was pretty.
''' No, he answered, she is very strong
and very good, but she is not pretty. She
is very ugly We all laughed but must
confess that admired him for his candor
Parents choose the wives for their sons,
and they have an eye to the useful as well
as the agreeable. If the woman is healthy
and strong she is quite an addition to the
working force of the family of which she
becomes member.
1.-THE bishops choose the wives for the
priests, and they generally select the girls
of the older priests who are burdened with
the largest families, which Is very prac-
tical way Of looking at the question.
Nothing on earth equals in magnif-
cence the barbaric splendor of those old
czars | visited the museum, where they
showed me with great pride the products
of the Russian mines. Here was the larg-
est nugget of gold In the world; the largest
lump of silver, the largest specimen of
malachito and the largest lapis lazuli, with
a hundred and one other things from the
Siberia mines
Il saw the saddles and caparisons of
some of these old warriors One, | remem-
Der, had large saddle blanket, as you
might call it, made of cloth of gold. At a
distance it looked white, and it was large
enough to cover the greater portion Of the
body of the war horse a closer inspec-
ton showed that it was covered over with
diamonds of the purest water. The larger
ones were sewn on in the form Of stars and
figures, but the entire surface was covered
with these gems.
1.-The blanket was worth thousands and
thousands of dollars.
Then, In one of GATHERINGS palaces, |
saw columns of pure amber, with the walls
of entire rooms covered with the same
costly stuff.
And yet, in other countries of Europe,
amber has become so scarce that it is al
most impossible to secure pure article,
and imitation amber is used for jewelry.