The Camden journal. [volume] (Camden, S.C.) 1866-1891, 1889-03-15
HUaoR OF FHHRAL


The placs-tecaR the roll Breakfast.
ACrhowling swell"-Fhe sea in 9
ssofm.
A political nobleman-The of'cis9|
count. ..ss,s
"catch wordsn- -'tNab,n grab,
'tclutch," etc. e
Happy is the dude wno has the mus
tache down fine. ~,
A bank note-HDear sir, you're ac1 !
count is overdrawn.n
There is but little poetry in q gas bin
when the metre is out of order.
Object to the impediment to their
speech. The Chicago Anarchists.
A woman glass. eater named Eliza I'M
Denver dime museum, is known locally
as Crystal Lie. Pktsburg Chronssle.
When public ofIice-holder comes to|
feel that he is big gun, It is time ioII
him to be fred. journal.
A kiss is often explosive. But we have
yet to see the lovers who shrink fre>
this particular kind of dynamite.
Pacific State. 4
A mans disposition can often. bel
Judged by the color of his eyes, but still
more correctly by the color OF his noss.|
Burlington Free Press.
When the bashful young man finally
comes to the point, it cools his ardos|
considerably to find, perchance, that ~
is the freezing point. -4irlas.
How like the ague is this boon
or matrimonial strife! -
The fever ends in one short moon,
The chill runs on through life.
-B dfords MdJds
sThat Campbell family are the
scum of the earth2" "But, Harry,
move in the very highest circles. = 8.
isn't scum always found at the tor
Time.
'.Well, Patrick, what struck you
during your Southerntrlp2" "Theu
sorp, replied Patrick, with grin
disclosed the absence of nine molar
Burlington Fres Press.
"I-aw-wahnt tie, doncherkI
to match my eyes, "Let me see.
eyes and-er-sorry sir, but our
ties with red edges are all sold. H
some in next week. p HarPer's Bdsos
Monsieur X-ssI have an invitation
NIme. Y.'s ball next week Monsi
$50 have II Monsieur J. last
ished) )-..Is it possibleI She must i
tend to give . very large parf
4metaca. .
A Rcado barber 70 seei1
never, get an tsedge' ON hls razors, g -. q
5dnmbfounded several days ago whenTr
customer dropped slto the chair ana
said: "Giye me laughing gas before you
begin operations. go IS s
"Why not call North Dakota Inca
nana2n asks the st. Paul Pioneer 4 reg; 9.
'rhat,s it: why rot2 Why not call is y.
cbanbunagungamaug2 Why not call
Il Chimoua ssabamtook, or Molechunka
munk7-Nwpich Bulletin.
netition is being circulated among
the business men of New YORK., Wno
natronizc the elevated road, requesting
The onards not to kill more than one
member in family, except in cases sot 't
absolute necessity.-LJe., =
The merchant hud been sick unto
death. ,.Tell me the truth, doctor nc
sand. "is the danger overp "sure, :" sac ~
the doctor; "thereis is no moro danger; tne
crisis is passed. And the merchant re-
vokes his bequest OF $4,000 to the % nos
pital. .ep;..-
Bad Actor Gn restaurantl-Wa allel. =
what do you mean by bringing me sue,
eqqs9 They are absolutely rot.en. ~
Waiter (who had seen the actor Perion.
tne night before)--'I thought that wa
the kind you always got Sir '"-Drass
Magazine. ~ ,r
Miss spinster Ito snoe dea!er)-"
see that you have marked down some ~ =
your shoes" Shoe Dealer--"Ses; .na
line of ladies' shoes is marke9 down
We have marked 'em all down two sizes
Now there's tidy little gaiter, .l4.
think will just fit you" Miss spins1e
bushes and buys the shoes. -HarPsr'
Bazar. r.,
A patent-medicine render in countr.
village was dilating to crowd upon tn
wonderful efficiency of his iron bltters
"Why.a said he, "Steve jenkins ma
only taken the bitters one week when q
was showed into prison for murder. an
what does Steve do but open vein }
his arm and take iron enough out OF d
bIood to make crowbar, with which o
pried the doors open and let h'mse
outl"