Telegram-herald., 1889-11-09

Hts o-s za1 Lezt hAs 5se.
A printer t9la she f9llo~ang sxcsnent
story - Chieaso ttg-sa nan.
4 hsd . go.d oe. Pc s4ia. IA s
Monroe street fcton f2anary one q
those print shops where they Plbliss
stories u the skeleton Hunters last
Gurglinx Gasp or3eF - tls cord. it IS
the rsnkest kiud of rot. and i liable ~
give = printer blood poisoning u he
handles m4ch % it. IL IS Tie sort ~
literature thai ind ices hgtle boys 10 get
Up in the nlght. steal Sic Old man 5
poo et-hook, buy guns and START our
Vest 70 rescue the imperial maiden
from the lair of the rot5er chleflaln
and restore her % her sgonlzed parents.
There were twenty printers and six
liars, each f4ll Eedged AuAnl2s, work
ing IN the place. Tie ll4fs s4t - .
table la one end % the room grinding
out those unwholesoue stories as fast Is
We could put them in type One day /
Got = Wad % copy that wAs positively
slckening. II was about a lovely girl
who had been captured and torn from
her home By heartless white desperate
and his band of bloodthirsty Apaches.
The girl was in desperate TX She
either had - marry the villain OF be-
come his wife, be- didn't care which, and
be was then on ais way 20 cave IN the
mountains, where he was going 70 have
the ceremony performed.
That night they camped in rocky
gorge two hundred miles from nowhere
and bound the unfortunate maiden % a
tree with the usual buckskin thongs,
which cut deep into her tender wrists
Then they all laid down and went 70
sleep. In the meantime old Zeke, tho
Hairy Scout, who was on the trail,
sneaked up just az daylight, when peo-
PIE sleep the soundest. Zeke sailed in
and killed twenty-five or thirty Indians
with the butt end of his trusty rife. lie
didn't want TO shoot for fear he would
waken the others. Then, after he had
cut a notch for each corpse in his gun
stock and hung tho coarse, black scalp
locks 70 his belt, he released the girl,
hoisted her under his arm, jumped into
the saddle and rode away.
He rode at full speed for forty-eight
miles without stopping When night
closed in the bold scout pulled rein and
went into camp. First he picketed his
horse, then built fire, fixed a cot of
leaves for the girl, and got her some
thing 10 eat out of his saddle-bags. This
was where | got in my work.
This first thing Zel1e took out Of the
bags was several thick slices Of fresh
Vienna bread with honey on them.
Next came cold boiled ham, cut thin, an
apple pie with a short, crispy upper
crust, and last a tender spring chicken,
roasted a delicate brown. Mind you, he
had all this stuff in pair Of saddle
bags in the wilds of the Rocky mount
aims, three hundred miles from civiliza-
ton, in the year Of 1886. 1t made me
sick, but resolved that the poor girl
should have one good feed if died for
it. So showed in another paragraph
like this, completing the bill of fare:
'''After getting the girl started Zeke
reached into the saddle-bag and pulled
out bowl Of steaming hot consomme
and a brOiled fresh mackercl, some dev-
lied crabs, cold Slaw. potato salad, half
fry, veal outlets Dreaded, with tomato
sauce, green corn on the cob, some clam
chowder, stewed turkey. a portion of
rice pudding, two cups Of chocolate,
pork tenderloin, Rochefort cheese and
a bottle of Bass ale, Saratoga chips, a
plate of vanilla ice cream, a Chinese
paper napkin, sliced cucumbers, some
California grapes and nickel-plated
nut-cracker.
did it go?" asked an interested lis
tener.
No, it didn't" said the printer, sad
", but did. The boss came to me
next morning with proof slip and want
ed 10 know who was writing that story.
! said the author was making a staggeI
in that direction, but he wasn't giving
the girl fair show.
That may be- said the boss, but If
he wants TO run cafe in connection with
the story we'll hire cook and make it
easier for you
Then he told me thatI was too smart
TO be printer, and had better go out
where the cool air would strike me. l
went