Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1889-10-09

DOdI on liver III A1dlue, WUell, tuIOuS III
the fault of one the other was precipi-
tated into the water. She was saved,
with some difficulty, by a gentleman
who saw the accident. The other was
chided on her return to the shore.
'tHow could you be SO careless with
YOUR little cousin? What would have
done if Mr.. Briggs hadn't saved her?"
''Oh, replied the little six-year-old,
demurely, ''we'd have got her when the
tide went OUT,
HE HAD LEARNED SOMETHING
One day Patrick O'Connell, a little
Irish boy, took his dinner to school, and
it was eaten by cats while school was In
session. The next morning he ate long
after the others were through, and, be-
ing asked why he was eating so long, as
he seemed to have no appetite, said:
"Why, the cats took my dinner yester-
day, so I'm going to put it where it
will be safe"
81 HAVE one little girl under my
care,', remarked a teacher, "whoSe
dress have pinned up every day this
week. There isn't button on the
garment" Pins and patience alike be-
came exhausted. "'Why doesn't your
mother sew buttons on your dress,
time, the child replied. Couldn't she
do it last night?' No, ma am; she had
TO 60 to prayer meeting"
a POPULAR physician of Brooklyn
has a little girl who expounded the
scriptures to him in the following re-
hn,-
Sunday school lesson on Friday night;
The Lord is my shepherd and 1 shall
not want. He maketh me to lie (hesi-
tatingly), He maketh me to lie-and do
lots of other things.''
81 AM sorry," said the hungry look
ing boarder, as he set the pitcher down,
THAT have said SO many unkind things
about the milk,
"Why?" inquired the landlady, su-
spiciously.
Because 1 fear that it has soured on
me.''
Two Paris loafers are reading a no
tice: Lost, black poodle. One hun
dred francs reward" One of them says
to the other. "You must take the one
you stole yesterday - '.But it is white,''
"Y You must say that it has turned white
through grief''
Mrs. ALEET-If you should make
thousand dollars Unexpectedly, Tom,
would you give me that diamond pend
ant I've been looking at so long?
Mr.. Aleet-Why, yes, dear.
Mrs. Aleet-Very well; I'll order it
to- morrow. l stopped wanting that
ivory-finished piano to-day, and a thou
sand was just the price of it.
s'WHAT have you for me this morn
mg?" said Blinkins, as the letter car
rier approached" something import
ant. suppose"
NO, sir; only a couple of postal
cards. One of them is an invitation to
the meeting of the Tawk-Tawk Club
and the other is from your wife, asking
you to meet her at the train"
y WoMAN's REvENGE.-Mrs. Hin
ton (recently married ibid you know
my husband was very ill?''
Miss Carrington-''I supposed he
must be, my dear, Before he married
you he told me had broken his heart. ="
NEARLY A STRANGER.-Mr. Club
man-"My private secretary, young
Nice fellow, says he is an acquaintance
of vours.''
Miss Citybelle- -"What impudenceI
L never meet him except at the sea-
side, and last summer 1 even refused to
become engaged to him again.
LECTURER-All statistics prove that
the blond women are more difficult t.
get along with than the brunettes.
AStoni>hed Man in the Audience
(starting up)-Are you certain of that?
Professor-It is a fact.
Astonished Man Then believe my
wife's black hair is dyed.
A NATURAL MIsTAKE.-Little
Brother (bedtime)-''Why don't you
take your stockings off?''
Little Sister (whoSe mother buys the
cheap black kind )-''I's dot all of 'em
off at will come off. -
SCHOOL TEACHER-Now. Johnny
Jones, your father has red hair and SO
have you. That is mark OF heredity.
Johnny Jones-Yes, ma'am.
School Teacher-Now, who in the
class can tell me what heredity isi Will
lie Dykins, you may answer.
Willie Dykins-Johnny Jones' red
hair.
Tonight and 1o-Morrow Night,
And each day and night during the weei;
you can get at all druggists Kemp's Bal
sam for the Throat and Lungs, acknolyl-
~lged to be the most successful RENE, "
ever sold for the cure of Coughs, CrouIr,
Bronchitis, Whooping Cough, Asthma,
and Consumption. Get bottle to-day and
keep it always in the house, so you can
check your cold at once. Price SOC and 81.
Sample bottles free.
There liz no substitute for wisdum,
but silence IL the best that haz been dis
covered yet.
Warm weather often causes extreme tired
feeling and debility, and in the weakened con-
dition OF the system, diseases arising from i'm
pure blood are liable to appear. To gain strength,
10 overcome disease, and to purify, yitaliZe,
and enrich the blood, take Hoods Sarsaparilla.
Coal tar should be spread ON tarred
paper roofs at least once a year if they
n rl ,-f aat, al -