davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25
PuNGENT PARAGRAPHS.

Lie on tho left side, says health Ecl,
Journal. If it had been law Journal
it would have said: Lie on both sides. 5
Boston Courier.
1t is said Of District Attorney out
West, by a rival politician, that the
only thing he ever succeeded in hang
ing was his single. brakes Maya
zine.
cit takes three generations to
make a gentleman. 1t would some
times seem as if the thing most requls-
tie to accomplish the result were one
regeneration. Puck.
Jane,n said Carlyle on one Occa-
sion to his wife, but then he was no
model husband 80 ane, yell find your
self in a more compact and pious frame
OF mind if We shut yer mouth. :
I'll am self-made man, said
a sharper, the other day to a gentle
man whom he had just got the best OF
in bargain. II am glad to hear you
say so, 7 responded the gentleman, "for
itrelieves my Maker Of a great re-
sponsibility. N. Y. Ledger.
Lately a gentleman sat down to
write deed and began: know one
woman by these = y on are wrong, =
said a friend, sit should read sknoW all
men, etc. ..Very well. y answered
the writer, ssif one woman knows it all
men will, of course. Z
Mr.. Impecunious Mary, 1 have
brought you home a little book on
How to Cook Mrs. Impecunious
(sarcastically) 80 Thanks. my dear,
but what I need worse is a book on
What to Cook - Burlington Free
Press.
Philosophic bore-..If you will lis
ten to me for ten minutes I'll prove to
you that the Theory Of the survival of
the fittest is correct" Sarcastic suf-
ferer" If that theory is correct, how is
it that you manage to survive? Ex-
plain that, please, before you go any
further. = Texas Siftings.
Mrs. Walworthy Il declare,
Henry, your eternal talk, talk, talk of
how good a cook your mother used to
be will drive me wild some day! My
most fervent wish is that little johnny
will never worry his wife that way
when he grows up and has a home .
Mr.. Walworthy-' There's no danger
of that. ''Terre Haute Express.
'tAaffr Mr.. Dusenberry can't see any
thing about the shipwreck which hap
pened in the paper s'Look under the
head Of marine intelligence, my dear. !"
ut isn't there Then look under
marine stupidity" .There isn't such
heading s'Then there ought to be,
my dear. No Intelligent collision ever
happened. Time.
"A man who persists in imagining
that he can sing when everybody else
knows that he can't, lifted up his voice
the other day in a strain Of harassing
discord that compelled his wife to COM
mand him to stop. 'sWife," said he,
''you are too critical. When man is
doing the best he can that is all that
should be asked of him. every well,
my dear, but the best thing you can do
is to abstain from singing and GER
tainly don't ask any thing more.
Lewiston journal.
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25
a TAILOR'S DAUGHTER.
Story of the Morsanatic Wife of Eerdi-
nand III. of Portugal.

Story of the Morganatic Wife of Eerdi-
nand III. of Portugal.
s A little over five years ago Spring.
field man in Paris found a former
Springfield girl in ah1uence as the NOR
ganatic wife of Ferdinand III, the ex-
King of Portugal She received him
kindly and inquired particularly after
several Of her former mates in this city.
The story Of her life was familiar to
lilly Haynes and his sister, now
travelling in Europe, and while in Lis
bon recently their cards were presented
to the Condessa d'Edla, as she is now
known. The Countess appointed an
hour for visit and received her Amer
lean friends very cordially, as a letter
states. 10 quote by permission: eve
enjoyed our visit very much. The ex-
terror of the house or building where
she lives is not at all prepossessing;
we would call it shabby; but they all
seemed to be the same. The drawing
room where she received us was hand
somely furnished in modern style. She
expressed herself as being rather de-
sirous of returning to the States to live,
and should doubtless do so sfter her
business matters are settled here. She
says society is dull, and since the death
of her husband she has gone out but
little" This ig Elise Hensler, who
thirty-fve years was the little daughter
OF Conrad Hensler, a tailor, whose
shop and house were in a humble loca-
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25
An Old Time Partisan.

| 49, =
Its easy to recall to mind his familiar
figure as he sits, during winter EVENINGS.
IN his favorite corner. s
Id MS Il easy chair. with pipe in hand and
ms sllVer-rimmed ssspecs' pushed back
untll they lind a soft resting place on his
neloVed snoW-white head, with eyes spark
ing ana ms face beaming with pleasure as
ne calls back old memories of DAYS long
gone by, he IS likely to talk something after
this fashion: Is
It's q long time since was a boy. All,
put mat was many years ago. Sixty long
years nave gone and the good Lord knows
they We're short enough. was then as
spruce and pert as any chap whereabouts
"Oh, but we boys were boys! Things
have changed a heap since those days
Boys then didn't take much stock in stylish
clothes and they didn't carry canes like
they donoW. Clothes and canes didn't cut
much caper then, but it was good hard
sense and work.
The boy who could do the biggest day
work-could cut the most wood, split the
most rails, ploW the most corn, was the
most envied for he was sure to have the
sweetest and best lookin' gal at the ss1ngin'
school, or apple peelin'.'
II tell you those were good old times!
: didn't think any thing Of going thirty
mile or more to see your grandmother,
and we didn't have very good roads either,
but generally had to follow some old Indian
trail.
"Talkin' about sickness then, there was
no sickness like now. If we had cold, a
pain, or any thing, there was the best med
icine in the world found in any log cabin
home you came across. Why, remember
that my old grandmother, God bless her
soul, she's been dead these fifty years or
more, could make the best home made
medicine for miles around Her ssarsapa-
rilly' couldn't be beat. Come to think I
just read in the paper about somebody who
is making this same old log cabin medicine,
under the name Of Warmers Log Cabin
Sarsaparilla
st does seem sple ndid to think that you
can buy those good old home cures at the
druggists nowadays.
ssMebby you think people were not
healthy in those days, but tell you that il
was mighty seldom anybody was sick Ions
when they had such good old grand
mother medicine SO handy.
ssPeople used to be stronger, healthier
and they lived longer, when was a boy
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25
Physicians wise in Their Generation.

Physicians Wise in Their Generation.
The above class of scientists recognize,
and have repeatedly borne testimony. to
the efficacy of Hostetter's Stomach Bitters
as a remedy and preventive of fever and
ague, rheumatism, want Of vigor, liver com
plant, and some other ailments and infrm
conditions of the system. Experiences and
observation have taught them its value.
They but echo the verdict long since pro-
nounced by the public and the press. Only
the benighted now are ignorant of Amer
ica's tonic and alternative
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25
Thought He Saw a Difference.

MARIA. do you remember that fine
dinner You got up all BY yourself on
the day l asked you to be mine?''
9 es. indeed, George!''
Every thing was splendid.
~ am sure it was. 2
An An, q wish Your mother was living
with us now, Maria!''-
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25

a MAN in Rothschild, Neb., dressed him
into a coffin which he had purchased. II
this position he went to sleep When his
friends discovered him, some hours later
he was dead.
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25

W. i. THOMAS and J. c. Hunt, of Lowndes
County, Ga, have deer farms. The animals
are as tame and gentle as cattle. They are
Kept IN pastures that are Enclosed by wire
fencing twelve feet high.
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25

. PAIN from indigestion, dyspepsia and too
hearty eating, is relieved at once by taking
one of Carter's Little Liver Pills Immediate
" after dinner. Don't forget this.
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25

GOOD ADvIcE.-Use Hale's Honey of Hore
hound and Tar fora cough or cold. Pike
Toothache Drops Cure in one minute.
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25

AMONG the portraits on the walls in the
study Of the late John Brighttis one Of
Gladstone, one of Washington and one Of
Lincoln.
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25

RUSSIAN naval officers We're the first to
make general use Of and appreciate the adj
vantages of breech-loading guns for their
men-of-War
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25

PHILIP ARMOUR is said to give away moth
ing less than fye-dollar tips to walters,
train hands, ETC., when he travels.
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25

To REGULATE the stomach, liver and bowels,
Little Liver Pills every night Try them.
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25

JOHN BRIGHT's collection Of pipes is OF
great value, and is to be preserved intact
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25

"A WALLINGFoRD Comm milkman has a
shepherd dog with three tails.
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25

KING MILANs last official act was to dec
crate his cab-driver.
The Progress. [volume] (White Earth, Minn.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-25

l5 70 SOU ing Us. Agents sns G
can furnish horse and give their whole time to
Rlo y also few VACANCIES in towns and cities
7MB-Pease state age and business experience Never
mind about sending stamp for reply B. II. j. d. Co.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-19

VILE f. POND, saroT, e s4,SsssSs gicss ..seas 9.s
Sno sportsnen some valuable hints on rabbit
and squirrel shooting.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-19
THEY WANT TO KNOW
JohnstoWn Citizens Demand Definite
Information About the
DISTRIBUTION OF RELIEF FUNDS.
Another Brace of Murders in the West
Virginia Mining Region.
ALL THE NEWS FROM NEARBY TOWNS

JoHEsTowN, October 18-Notwlthstano-
ing the statements of members of the State
Commission that everything is moving
along satisfactory here, such is not the case,
Within the past few days the genera
opinion prevailed that everybody would be
paid on a percentage, and members OF the
Board of INQUIRY seemed to understand 1t
that way. This being denied, the people
were at a loss to understand anything about
the situation. So great has the dissatis-
faction become that the Finance Committee
took cognizance of it to-day by requesting
the Board of Inquiry to make public state
ment of the condition OF things.
The letter concludes as follows: The time
has come when further delays must have ample
justification. Many cases are now arising daily
where people are obliged to make sacrlnces
which wonld be prevented if they could receive
if they had any certain knowledge that such an
award would be made. Will you kindly give
us official information on why the money is not
paid out"
PLENTY OF LETTERS.
The following was also addressed to the
Flood Commission:
To J. b. Kremer, Esq, Secretary of Flood Com
mission:
DEAR SIR-By resolution of the Committee
on Finance, the Board of Inquiry has been re-
Quested to answer the following matters: nave
you finished your labors for the final dlstribu-
tionP What ippediments, if any. are in the
way of prompt distribution to classes ana D!
Will the money be paid out in accordance with
your awards, or is any further revision OF the
schedules contemplated? The interest IN mat
ter of distribution is so great and the delay IN
this matter of a day or even an hour is now SO
detrimental that 1t is due to the public that
full and official information should be pub
lished. Will you kindly advise us In regard to
the following matters: What are the I'm,
pediments if any, to the immediate ana maj
distribution of the relief money? has the
Bureau of Inquiry completed its laborsT WIN
the money be paid in accordance with awards
OF the Bureau of Inquiry, or will the schedules
be subject to changes or notifications? II so,
how and upon what principle will these
changes be made, and who will make them. ana
WHEN WILL THIS WORK
be accomplished? An early reply will greatly
oblige. By order of the Committee on Finance.
CYRUS ELDER, Secretary"
The committee of leading citizens who had
been appointed to inquire the excuse OF the
delay have been instructed that if sufhcientrea-
sons are not given that they shall at once call
public meeting to take action on the question.
1t is stated that the Flood Commission Will
meet here next Tuesday.
The transfer and reinterment OF the unlden-
titled dead will begin next Monday and II Is
suggested that those who have lost friends
whose bodies have not been identlfed that
they be present when the graves are opened,
when an opportunity will be given and all pos
sible clews furnished for Identification.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-19
NEW ADVERTISEMENTS.
B. & B.
SATURDAY. October 10.


SPECIALS FOR TO-DAY.
8BUTTON LENGTH SUEDE
KID GLOVES, 81, with fine and
handsome embroidery - superb
quality-the remarkable part of it
is the price, 81.
CENTS KID AND CASTOR
GLOVES, for street and driving
wear, in largeS variety, from the
most Celebrated Makers-newest
styles cf stitching and all the new
features in overseams and fastenings,
and most important, correct shades
and low prices.
Some rare Bargains. Fine ALAS
KA SEAL JACKETS at 500 each.
Superb ones ditto, at $I25.
Large arrivals LADIES LONG
GARMENTS, JACKETS AND
WRAPS for to-day's sales.
MISSES AND CHILDREN'S
WRAPS-choicest and largest as
sortment of these goods offered this
season-prices that will interest
your pocketbook if you want salts
factory quality and newest styles
and cloths.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-19
TWO OF LUCIA FELANDO. ,;a,s.
Marriage License. Granted Yeste

american romance, by Dante FFedlR, Is I
lished in to-morrolU's DISPATCH
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-19
A LUSATIc.s EBULLITIoN.
A Former Gas Producer who Wants Aid
In Manipulating Markets.

A Former Gas Producer who Wants Aid
In Manipulating Markets.
The appended communication, which evl-
IDENTIFY ought to have been postmarked
"Dixmont Insane Asylum" but for some
unaccountable reason was not, has been
sent to this Office. 1t must either have been
smuggled out of the asylum by one OF the
slyest and most cunning lunatics, or have
been written outside of an insane instltu-
ton by some disingenuous knave, VINO
thought all he had to do to compel news
paper to bull or bear stock which he was
interested in manipulating, was to accuse
that journal Of doing what it never had
come anywhere near doing. The DISPATCH
is a newspaper, and can't be cajoled or
coaxed into the fields of either bulls or pears
to suit any manipulstor's purpose. pee
what this one has to say:
Editor of the Dispatch, City:
DEAR SIR-Keep up your persistent bulllng
of Natural Gas Shares; Keep on trying 70
deceive the public to the end.
Gas is failing just so sure as the sun snines,
and all the newspaper bulling In e1is.ence
cannot resuscitate the fields from which tne
leading companies of this city have been, and
are now, obtaining their supply. TnLty-sl1
1857 inch mains may for a time meet the re-
Quirements. but the beginning OF the eno is
near and don't you forget it,
Widows; Orphans; Butchers; Bakers anu
Candle-stick makers by either Ignorant or
wlllful misrepresentation of the press OF Inls
city, have been encouraged to invest In class
of securities without an intrinsic value. heep
Ex-PRopUcER.
PITTsBURG, October IL, 1889.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-19
NEW ADVERTISEMENTS.
NEW ADVERTISEMENTS.
O.McClintOck&CO.
CARPETS
AND
DRAPERIES.

The lightest and most deli
cate shades of color are now
permissible and advisable in
Pittsburg's clear atmosphere
and clean surroundings. Car
pets and Curtains are now
selling freely which in the
smoky days of Pittsburg
(anti-natural gas days) would
have been admired but not
purchased.
The delicate harmony and
chaste appropriateness to
each other, in form, color and
design of our new Carpets,
Curtains and Furniture, will
be made apparent by an in
spection of our show windows,
our Exposition display and
our new stock in store.
We can aid you in the diff
hcult task of combining fab
RIGS and colors in correct and
tasteful furnishing by expe-
rienced and reliable statesmen.
Special designs and sketches
of draperies will be submitted
if desired.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-19
PUBLIC WORKS CLOSING.
Water Pipes and Sewers Pushed TO Antici.
pate Cold Weather.

"aIer Hlpes ana sewers tuened TO Anttci-
pate Cold Weather.
As the 18th of November approaches the
works in progress on the various streets OF
the city are being hurried up to avoid the
subsequent probable cold snaps interfering
with the business. Superintendent Brown,
of the Water Bureau, says there are now
only about ], 200 feet yet to lay of the 30
inch water main to Bunker's Hill street.
and that will be completed by the date men
toned unless some extraordinary impedi-
ment in the shape of rocky formation or un-
favorable weather should intervene. All
the mains leading to the city will be con-
nected with this giant pipe. The 16-inch
pipe on Penn avenue from Fifth to Home
wood is finished, and all the small pipe, 6
and 4-inch, contracted for, will be COM
pleted next week.
The 18th of November is generally
thought to be the limit at which all the
streets must be closed up, as provided BY
the ordinance, but the city bureaus are not
particular as TO a week or so. Last winter.
which was an open one, unpaved streets on
the outskirts of the city were kept open for
sewer construction the whole season. On
the paved streets, however, the ordinance is
strictly enforced.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-19
IRREGULAR OCCURRENCE.

Two More Murders Reported From the
West Virginia Mining Region.
ESPECIAL TELEGRAM TO THE DIsPArcHi
WHEELING, W. VA, October 1S-Meager
accounts have been received here of the mur-
ders committed Wednesday at Elkhorn, in the
Wyoming county mining region. Moses Ben
mis-, a Belgian miner, quarreled with his wife
late on Wednesday afternoon and shot her
four times, death resulting in very few
minutes.
About the same hour and in the same com.
munity a negro named Arthurs crushed his
wife's head with a stone. In each case the
husband charged the wife with unfaithfulness.
Both men are IN jail at Bramwen.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-19

Druggists Carry CoaIine Powders.
CoalIne Headache Powders are guaranteed
to cure any case of headache.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-19
GROWTH OF LAUNDRIES.
Sixteen Concerns Doing Business In the City
at Present.

ut Present.
The election of Mr.. c. H. Brace. of this
city, as one of the Vice Presidents of the
Laundrymen's National Association, is an
other evidence of the great growth of the
laundry business in this city within the
past few years.
The first to engage in the steam laundry
business in this city was Charles Pfeifer, of
Allegheny City, who established a plant
about Is years ago. Three years later
Brace Bros. removed here from Titusville
and entered the field. Following them
came the Iron City Steam Laundry, and
to-day there are 16 or II laundries doing
business.
In conversation with a representative of
the firm of Brace Brothers yesterday. the
AGENT stated that thousands OF families of
t5is city instead Of doing their own washing
give II 70 the steam laundries. The latter
have demonstrated that they can do the work
better and cheaper than it can be done at
home. The laupdries give employment 10
between AIS and 800 young women and men.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-19
JAMES ARCHIBALD q BRO.
4 III I'D " A A -

LIVERY AND SALE STABLES
LIZ, 119 and l36 Third avenue, two doors below
Smithfeld st., next door to Central Hotel.
Carriages for funerals, s. Carriages for operas
parties, &C., at the lowest rates All new car,
riages Telephone communication. myl-lI-rTs
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-19
NEW ADVERTISEMENTS.
NEW ADVERTISEMENTS.
UNDERWEAR
FOR GENTLEMEN,
LADIES' AND
CHILDREN.

CHILDREN
Exceptional T1Iues 7sOsU Bet''.
offered:
Gents Merin0 Undersht7'ts
and Dr0sOers, sOorth 4Oc, at
25c.
Gents fancy Scotch Wool
Shirts and DrasCers, sUOTth
81, at 75c each.
Gents AU- Wool Shirts and
DrasOers, Scarlet, White, Gray
and Natural CoLors, 75c set,
sold elsewhere for 81.
Gents Genuine Tic1,iG and
English Oxford Shirts and
Dr0IOers, IN saesO and destT-
able cOL0ri7sgS, at S3c each.
GenHeme7a's Lambs Wool
Shirts and DrGsUers at $40
each.
Full line of Gents No7TOLE
and NeaU BrupssUicE Shirts
and DrGaCers ranging in price
from 81 to So 25.
Ladies' Shru,,hc Knit Under
sUeGr Gt 69c and 99c.
Cbildren's ShrusE Knit Un-
dersOear at 25c and SIC.
Ladies' White Meripo at
39c.
ChSldreas's White .Merino at
lie.
-AU sizes In Youths Scotch
Wool at soc salt.
Ladies' fine Cancels Hair
Underwear at 59c.
CItilGre,a's Cancels Hair
Underwear from 16c up.
Ladies' Natural Wool I'm
dersUear, zoe each.
Ladies' Scarlet Wool Under
UeGr, elegant quality and
,Ooa'th 81 25, at 81. Also one
lot (On bargain table, main
aisle, Sicth st. d0oY.) of Misses
and Children's Medicated
Scarlet Shirts and PGntelettes,
strictly 0IL-sO0oL aOith sill
binding and pearl 6uttosas, at
just Osse-TGIf actual
Don't miss them.
DANZIGER & SHOBNBERG,
Sixth St. and Penn Ave.
ocls
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-19
SIS, SIS, $40, $25 and $50

for finest overcoat sell
hitherto been accustomed have their Over
made order Suppose $40 for Oyecoat made
tailor how much do you suppose he much
profit tailor and toward q
dating the owing by those who NEVER PAY their taor
will who his tailor "gougd the
and we'll you all this
money you good goods and satisfaction every
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-19
A Theatrical Company In Trouble.

IhFbOIA48 11-H71S7IAAA 10 TIE UISFAICH.l
BEAVER FALLS, October lS.-The Agnes
Villa Company played at the Sixth Avenue
Theater last night, and then discovered that
their advance agent had left his trunk here
and skipped out without warning An investi-
cation went to show that he had billed no
towns ahead of them, so they Immediately can
called all engagements in the West and this
morning returned to Brooklyn to reorganize
and make fresh start
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-19
NINE SPECIAL DRIVES
UNDERW EAR =.

Bows Scotch Wool Undershirt I6 only Childrns
Scarlet Undersh size I6 inch only Mems fancy stripe
Merno Undershir only Mems double breasted Scotch
Meno Shirts Drawers cheap 5oc for soc only Mems all
Natural Wool Shirts Drawers, 83c only Mems strictly
Hair Shirts Drawers 81 well worth 81
Mems a-woo double Scarlet Shirts FAC only. Mems
fancy stripe awoo Shirts Drawers worth 81 for ooc only
Special values in Mems Natural Wool Socks a4c only
will to our special bargains in lined Kid Gloves
only worth 75c Full line of Cardigan Jackets prices
to $ Jersey Oversh guaranteed non-shnkabe soc up