Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1889-07-12
Distressing n Tram.

/ was eating dinner at a farm house
In Indiana when one OF the children
came in and announced that high
way tramp had called at the kitchen
door and asked for a bite to eat The
farmer was very fat. very short, and
very bald-headed man, and he was
postmaster at the corners and justice
OF the peace in and for the county.
He had IA son called James, another
called Moses, AMI hired man who
was addressed as Towser. He sent
out word for the tramp TO sit down
and rest, and as a laugh went around
the table he explained:
After dinner | shall be pleased TO
show you how we encourage tramps in
this section. This is evidently new
man To this part of the state or he
would never have called here"
After dinner We went out. The
tramp was sitting under a cherry tree,
looking IA comfortable as you please,
and evidently unsuspicious that any
thing except dinner was in store for
him. He looked to me like bad man
To fool with, but the farmer didn't
bceui 10 Ttdu MIN JnhL way.
Now, them" he said, as he rubbed
his fat hands together, ''you will stand
up"
What furP" asked the tramp.
TO be kicked! | am going to boot
you from this spot down to that silver
ed telephone pole.
But, / object"
Cant help that As fourth-class
postmaster OF the United States of
America | command you TO arise"
IF | am Kicked somebody else will
get hurt" cautioned the tramp as he
got up.
LAS one OF the Justices OF peace in
and for this county | command you to
disperse," said the farmer, as he turned
the tramp toward the gate and admin
istered kick.
Next instant he received left-hand-
er on the nose which knocked him in =
TO confused heap on the grass, and
the tramp got out of his old coat and
prepared for business.
"Towser, pulverize him. shouted
the farmer IA he struggled to his
knees. ''ln the name of the United
States | command you To knock him
down.
Towser advanced, his big fists doub-
led up, but the tramp danced to the
right and the left. and then sent in one
on the hired mans commissary de-
partmeut which doubled him up and
laid him among the hollyhocks.
james. Moses. make him a prison
err yelled the old man, as he plucked
"A handful of grass and held it TO his
bleeding nose
The tramp chucIlel. There was fun
ahead
The two boys were strapping young
fellows, strong enough to knock down
an OK, and they We're willing TO GO in.
As they stripped off the tramp backed
mp between two current bushes, where
they could not flank him. and as they
advanced upon him he griuned all
over. He played with them for IA
minute or two. and then drew "a long
breath, made three or four feintS. and
piled them on the grass together.
Neither moved to get up for full two
minutes Meanwhile the tramp
rested and looked over To me aud
queried:
You ant one of the crowd?"
'sNo.r
"And don't want me to disperse?'
Not particularly"
.'All right. don't think the United
States aud his gang want anything
more OF me just now, and rs have an
engagement down the road I'll move
on. When they get washed up and
the bandages on tell 'em | used to
scrap with the boys in Chicago in days
gone by. and that ! held myself in and
let 'em off very mild Good-by stranger.
Ia. la, old fatty"
And he had not been gone ten
minutes bcfor. the postmaster cam q
over to me AMI whispercd
Did You ever!'-New York Sun.
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