San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1889-07-03
CHAPTER XXXVIIl.


filtered
take it for granted that sheep and cattle
are born at as tender an age in America as
elsewhere, but the society for the protection
of animals probably prevents their being
killed for food while they are young enough
to enjoy life. and so the patriarchs alone are
reserved for the table.
That which renders the problem of dining
almost past solving is that the meat has to be
attacked with plated knives which tear but
do not cut it. | suppose that, as half the
lower class Americans still eat with their
knives, it was necessary to abandon the idea
of having steel knives for fear of their acct
dentally gashing their faces If sharp steel
knives were in general use in America the
streets would be full of people with faces
SCARED and scanned like those of the Heidel-
berg students
The Americans drink little else but water
at table, and one cannot help wondering how
it is that the filter seems to be an almost I'M
known institution in the land. Leave your
glass of water untouched on the table, and
in few moments thick sediment of mud or
sand will be visible at the bottom of it.
Down south it is worse still.
At Jacksonville was waited upon at table
by an extremely obliging negro.
One day he brought me some water, put ice
in it, and discreetly withdrew behind my
chair
took up the glass and infinitely inspected
its contents
"Epaminondas!" cried.
"Dat's not my name, sab; I'm called
Charles"
Charles, look at this water; there is a
snake in it."
Charles took the glass, looked in it, and
then, with a reassuring grin, ammo iced:
Its dead, sah."
THAT is comforting" said I, "but it may
have left eggs, which will come to life by
thousands inside me-"
Charles was facetious, and was not to be
put out of countenance for such trile. He
took up the glass again, re-examined it, and
replaced it on the table.
"Dere's no danger, sab; it's a male" he
said.
In almost all hotels south of Washington
the walters are colored men. The service is
but poor. The negroes are slow-it is the
guests who do the waiting"
At Delmonicos especially, and in the prin-
cipal hotels of New York. Boston, Philadel-
phia and Washington you can dine admir-
ably. In the smaller towns you must be con
tent with feeding.
But let us take our seats at the table d'hote
of the best hotel in any second rate town thai
you please in Pennsylvania Ohio, Indiana, or
some other state of the Union.
No printed menu. A young woman, with
an elaborate couture of curls, rolls and bangs,
tempt at you and, turning her back upon
you, gabbles off in one breath:
"Croutaupoturbotshrim psauceroastbeeftur
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS atoestomatoesapplet
incepievanillacream."
Do not attempt to stop her; she is wound
up. and when she is started is bound to 90 to
the end You must not hope that she win
repeat the menu a second time either If you
did not hear so much the worse for you.
Unfortunately the consequences are grave;
it is not one dish that you INSIST is the
whole dinner. You are obliged to order all
your repast at once, and the whole is brought
you, from soup to cheese, at one time.
! was so i'll inspired one day as to order
some soup to begin with. The waitress re-
fused downright to bring me anything more.
THAT is all you ordered, she said to me.
'You do not suppose can make twenty
journeys to the kitchen for you"
rose and sought the hotel keeper made
the humblest apologies, pleaded that was a
foreigner who had only been in America a
fortnight, and was not yet accustomed to the
habits of the Americans. Ipromised solemnly
never to trunsgress again in this way. Mine
host went to the young person who was at
the head of the battalion of harpies in the
dining room, and interceded for me with her.
had the happiness of being forgiven, and
was allowed to appease my hunger.
From that day forward, as soon as one OF
these witching damsels began her incarnation,
| cried out:
"Holdl Enoughl Bring it all in"
Then | would eat the least distasteful of the
messes and leave the rest can assure you
the hotel did not make much profit out OF me.