Idaho semi-weekly world. [volume] (Idaho City, Idaho Territory) 1875-1908, 1889-01-11
SCHOOL or JOURNALISM.
Colonel Snort Instructs His Assistant How
to Run the "Clarion."

"OhI oi all cACuFSiOu. vi course, III
distinguished journalist, Colonel Bill
Snort, of the Crosby County Clarioi
and Farmers indicator, was one O
the excursionists. He was obliged t.
leave his journal in charge OF his as
sistant, Johnny Fizzletop. As john.
is young and Eighty Colonel Snort ha,
to give him copious and minute in
structions how TO run the paper.
Now, Johnny, want you to re
member what tell you, and carry on
my instructions to the letter." sait
Snort.
Colonel, you can rely on me; bu
how about paying the printers on Sat
urdayP"
just tell them to wait until I ge,
back. They are used to that sort o.
thing
But heard tho foreman say he had
to have money for a new pair of pants
on Saturday or he would quit"
well. II he gets ugly you give him
an order on some of the advertisers
who owe us money"
There isn't any clothing store ow-
ing us money"
mo; but Higgins, who has the tin
shop owes us four dollars In trade"
What good will that do the fore
nanP"
GIVE him an order on the tin shop
or force-pump or something OF the
Kind. That will keep him in good hui
NOR until get back"
Suppose old Major Smith calls for
The rente"
HE amt going TO call. Show him
the copy OF the editorial in my desk.
1t Is headed "A Social Earthquake in
Crosbyville-Maior Smith Implicated. >
Tell him II he insists upon the rent you
will publish IT,"
Suppose Miss Pegasus calls to see
about publishing her poem on Autumn
nal Reveriesp"
Tell her that II she pays In advance
for seventy-five copies Of the paper you
will publish ii, md for two dollars
more you will mention 1t favorably as
work of genius In the editorial column.
Don't do 1t under two dollars, Johnny"
ANY thing elseP"
Don't expose the mayor and city
council unless they give the city print
ing to the Argus."
Amt there anybody can go for
while you are gomez l want to have
some fun myself"
go for tho Gar of Russia. He
amt likely TO subscribe. Let UP on
Bismarck or old Zwetbeer, the saloon
keeper on the corner, will take his
ad. out"
ANY thing elseP"
Eyes, give Andy Faulkner, OF the
Texas Central, and Gibbs, OF the Sun
set route. favorable personal notices
30 sure and say Gibbs Is a genial pas
senger agent That's what | always
call him when want him to give me u
pass TO get back home on"
'I'll do it."
And don't forget. II Banker Peter
son returns from New York, to call at
tention to him editorially. You might
sling in some poetry. Home from IA
Foreign Shore II you don't do 1t he
will order his business card out, and we
need that ten dollars year"
"How about my grub while you are
gomez
Bring out Pete Jackson OF the Cros-
byville Hotel for Congress- and he will
let you have all the meal tickets YOU
need. II he don't reciprocate publish
that item about his uncle being In the
Illinois penitentiary.
That amt going to feed me-"
johnny" replied the Colonel, Sc
verely, III don't seem to me that you
have any talent for journalism.
Yes, but I've got to eat"
You ought to have established a
FREQ lunch route long ago. Well, II the
proprietor of the Crosbyville Hotel re-
fuses to ante up, call attention to the
Napoleonic mind and massive intellect
Of the proprietor OF the American House
across the way. He sets pretty fair
table,
us that ALL ColonelP"
Remember that II any money comes
IN Sou arc 10 ireeze on 10 IL lOlIGct
MI you can. but don't pay bills. You
arc my agent while l am absent, but
you are only an agent to take in, not to
pay out money. Understand"
Yes, | understand. What elsePn
III any bottles of wine frc. wedding |
parties come In. turn 'em over 10 the |
printers If they show signs of quitting
work. 1t will put them In good humor. |
and make them feel they are identified
with the paper"
I'm do it.
There Is u ham sandwich in IN,
desk. It's yours. Johnny"
Thank you, Colonel"
Don't forget to feed the bull pup In
the back yard"
YES, III give him that sandwich, II
he can bite IT."
That's right Johnny. Look on the
humorous side OF life. Goodbye. John
ny, and Colonel Snort started on run
10 catch the train. - Ieras Siftiags.
-
As To His Expectations.