Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1889-12-01
BACKTOODS BELLIES.
as SEEN ON THEIR EATIvE HEATH BY
ONE OF THEIR SEX.
The Light Bombastic Toe" as it is
Tripped in the RI gion of the
Piney Woods.

Tripped in the RI gion of the
Piney Woods.
EDS. SUNDAY UNION: Did you ever at
tend country dance? Yes. of course yor
have; and is it not a quantity of fun
banked up in reserve for months to come
a never-failing source of hiliarity, out o.
which you can recall incidents to provoke
many an audible smile? My partner
chats bob" of course) and l attended
one not long ago, and in justice to the
perusers of the society column think il
ought to be recorded and few of the most
interesting features spread before their
gaze. We two old spinsters arrived on the
scene of action just in time to participate
in the grand walk-around, and on the
principle that, when you are in Turkey
do as the turkeys do, we sailed over the
floor in transport of joy, skipping the
cracks in the boards gracefully, and wiping
| up the dirt and sand with our costumes,
imported for the occasion. (The costumes
were imported, the sand being purely To-
call The music defies description-no
ordinary pen can do it justice. The strains
were of such an extraordinary turn of
| mind as to make ones feet undecided, but
| IN the language of the gamin, I'VE got
there"
THE BELLE OF THE EVENING
Was a fairy of some 165 avoirdupois, and
was attired, as well as my memory serves
me, in dark blue skirt that struck the
= Ill L
high mark a front of Oriental lace, a
basque of dove-colored satin, cut decolette
and especially so at the bottom-from
which floated streamers of narrow ribbon
of an exact match. At the swan-like throat
was some illusion, and attached to this was
bunch of pink roses, presumably culled
for the occasion from the bonnet of the
grandmother of said belle.
The drab hair was drawn away from the
forehead in a startlingly abrupt manner,
and reposed in little lump on the north
west section of her Uranium. Canvas shoes,
cotton gloves and a confident smile COM
pletes this toilette.
sULLIvANLIKE sERAPH.
Another candidate for the smiles of the
sterner sex was a vision in light blue
whose face rivalled the red, red rose in
color, and whose smiles would stop train
with ease. This rosebud was shoulder
striker" and no mistake; | was just in the
midst of gents t right" when | saw
number of arms and legs struggling in mid
air, and clearing the way for it TO land and
materialize, it took the shape of the little
blonde drummer, who had been whisper
ing airy nothings into the shell-like ear of
the female Sullivan. l caught her smile
which revealed whole joblot of tomb
I, cd 10,
fellow who timidly approached her:
Did you see me throw 'im? He's the
third one I've throwed this EVENING"
FEW OTHER SPECIMENS.
1t was not uncommon TO see dainty
miss in a pink satin and lace rig, with can
vas shoes on her feet, fit by in the arms of
specimen of manliness in a gray wooden
shirt, white collar, and q breath like a
| Dutch band of music.
One other erection in the dress-making
art that demanded my attention was a
startling combination of greens. The
basque had evidently sustained disappoint-
ment for its appearance was that of hav-
| ing started in to be q redingote, but had
| failed misersbly and was trying to bear its
burden gracefully and cheerfully. The
| back was military to severe degree OF
some twelve inches, while the front was
cut a Ia high water. On the back, just about
where the hustle should have been (but
where it WASN'T, were three immense brass
buttons that cleaned like the headlights of
three approaching trains. The sleeves and
skirt were Of two separate and distinct
shades, and around the edge of the skirt
row of folds and plating zig Jagged &C.
cording to its own sweet will.
Oriental lace seems to have been the
1a+ ID foI nd 0F
the effects of draperies reefed and looped
and yanked into place with artificial roses
were quite startling.
The band stepped out sometimes to i'm
bibe liquid refreshments-I might sag uery
sometimes-and in their absence the COM
pany conversed happily, and all went
merry as a funeral-knell.
The chandeliers were candles of forty
horse power-or something like that-and
while l was avoiding the crevices under
foot and prolonging life by escaping the No.
II brogans of my partner, dreamily float
| ing around to a time that threatened dis
| aster to the fiddlers arm, the sperm from
| the cleaning candelabra dripped down my
back in oily little rills.
But it was the Oriental dress that took
| my eye. l am quite confident it is not
copyrighted, ard to any of the lady readers
| of the SUNDAY UNION who are interested in
| it, and who will send stamps TO pay post.
age, l will send plans and specifications by
return mail. l do this in the interest Of
society.
AMBITION SAT UPON.
During the temporary absence of H. a.
| McCraney, editor of the Araldnche, the ed
itorial quill is in the hand of his gray
haired sire, Orlando McCraney. Thinking
| to be funny The other day, l went into his
| office to say something brilliant, and took
two or three friends along to note the
effect. l told the old gentleman [ had q
| business proposition to unfold, and he
| leaned back. stretched his feet across the
rusty old office stove. and gave me his at
| tention. l proposed that the Avalanche
/ start me out in its own interest around the
| world to beat the record of the two young
ladies who were gaining name and fame
for those two other publications. | grew
| animated over the scheme, and sat out on
the edge of my chair and assured him !
| could be ready inside of four days, and that
my baggage would consist simply of q
| tooth pick, pair of cuffs and a collar-but-
ton; how could take the steamer City Of
Lakeport," now lying at the wharf, reach
| Bartlett Springs the first day, Arbuckle
| (perhaps) the second. and in all probability
| would gain Davisville the third. i.
The old gents benevolent face kiDdled
| with interest. He hitched his chair nearer
passed one hand over his bald old pate tc
clear away the cobwebs-stunned, par.
alyzed, as he was by my business PROPOSE.
ton. In a moment his blue eyes twinkled
and with his sparse gray hair on all ends
he said:
'I'll tell you what we ,pM do. Well en-.
ter you in a contest against the world as
the biggest dead beat %
As i fitted out into the mud and drizzle
the thought struck me, with more forct
than ever before, that country editors art
not what they SEEM" LAURA.
| Lakeport, November 26th