The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1889-02-18
HIS VERY LAST CIGAR.
FlCkLEBY'S DIZZY EVENING AT A
FIVE DOLLAR BANQUET.

FIVE COLLAR BANQUET.
He Had IN and Was Going to Get the
Worth of His Money Everything Went
Beaatifauy Uu,n That uorrid Cigar Got
In It, Wicked Work.
1T was my last cigar said Nlr.
fIckleby, and. carried away bv the flood
OF sad memories, hc leaned his head upoH
his hand and wept "You See" said he,
THE fellows in our set determined 10
have banquet. and we've been saving
up since the last Fourth Of July. Il was
10 be five dollar affair. and for a week
beforehand lived on husks and abiurcd
PIE. was determined to eat. drink and
be merry, and forced myself intoa vast
capacity.
The night came II took me two
hours 10 dress, but il was worth while.
and when ! looked OF myself at 8 O'Clock
beheld a glass of fashion aud a mold of
form. There must have been fifty or
sixty Of the fellows at the banquet Be
sides our set there were large number
Of invited guests. IL was about lOoclock
when we sat down, and was so oma-
ciatcd from continued and rigorous fast
ing that l could hardly hold myself
straight
THAT FLYER sPURRED Hrf OS.
81 rarely touch wine, but when pay
> for single meal, when 90 my board
ing house | can get twenty-one FOR the
same money, | stop at nothing. So
permitted the mental to replcnish my
sherry glass az often as | emptied it,
while oysters, bouillon, salmon, sweet
breads and lamb chops vanished behind
my waistcOat. Nor did l permit the
claret TO low past me, but slipped it
while | discussed a tender bit Of beef
with asparagus. / have heard much of
the seductive and insidious influences Of
punch, but | must say that the punch
we fellows had at the banquet seemed 20
me more like lemon leo cream soda
water than the fiery untamed spirit Of
the alcoholic flask.
Cigarettes came with the punch. /
may as we'll confess that l am not an in
vetorate smoker. In fact. two or three
cigarettes year generally is sufficient 90
allay any cravings l have for the noxi0us
weed. But on an occasion like q five
dollar banquet ] ann possessed 90 indulge
in the most reckless dissipation and after
the punch made away with two cigar
cites. Partridge and q sip or two of
ciaret followed ! dealt literally, as is
my wont, with the ice cream and the
cakes the coffee and the fruits. and when
the t0asting began, and the champagne
was poured out / began 10 feel glorious.
"lhe speeches were capital Some of
the most learned and witty men | ever
heard answered TO the several t0asts
Every man around me was smoking. j
summoned a waiter and babe him bring
neacigar. twas Just glorious. Through
he blue wrcaths Of smoke l could Just
see the orator flinging out his arms over
the china and silver. slipped the spark
ling wine. Everything was happy. |
sat and laughed and let my head roll
where il would
The cigar finished l sat back finger
ing my wine glass as i listened to tine
speakers about me- Suddenly | felt
something like @ dark. damp green mold
creeping over me. l broke ont i'm pro-
fuse pcrspiration. 4 vague feeling that
was fun of prOt0plasms possessed me.
\ strange power seemed trying TO raise
my lungs into my throat. Ihespeoch lost
It's brilliancy. / shaded my eyes with my
hand and gazed earnestly az the table
cloth. The plates began 10 move about
strangely. Through the cloud of smoke
about my head came the sound Of clap
ping hands. Who had been speaking I
neither knew nor cared. There was q
wild, turbulent feeling of rebellion in the
region Of my diaphragm.
"HEs UNDER THE TABLE
Somebody rose and began TO speak.
| dared not raise my eyes % sec him.
The plates swan round and round How
the damp perspiration gathered on my
forehead / could endure the suspense
40 longer. l felt that something was
about 10 happen. Without a moments
hesitation | slipped under the grooming
board and began myself to groan in
unison with IT, 1t may be said that the
cause OF our gr0aning was identical-a
heavy load, II tobacco smoke can bo
called a load. ! lauguidly raised my
eyelids and looked around. | saw
forest Of legs belonging to the leading
preachers, doctors and lawyers in town,
a vast forest %. legs. l heard more hand
clapping. The legs began to dance, tho
table rocked, chasm opened some
where. Somebody cried, He's under
the tabler Then there was laughter.
All at once / went TO pieces. / re-
member nothing save a confused APP
pearance of black faces. ana wondered
If / was with Stanley. They hauled me
along. | tried 20 think whether | was
Emin Boy or Gerard Fickieby. If / was
the former | knew Stanley would rescue
me. Ii / was the latter ! knew that |
was not feeling well. Iasked the colored
person who was supporting me, and
whom ! believed 70 be tie king Of Sene-
gambia, if we were anywhere near the
Congo river. he said something about
Genesee, and believe argued the point
with him, though am not sure. know
| looked az the floor just a second, and
when | raised my eyes the stars were
shining over my head and tho Their
mometer was below zero.
1T seemed to me that the common re-
ports Of African torridncss were all
wrong. looked about for a chair, but
could find none, and was forced 10 cit
down on the sidewalk. \ policeman,
believe it was, came along and tried t.
carry on a social conversation with me-
He was an ignorant man, however, and
failed 20 follow my train Of thought, ana
| told him what thought o. him. Ire
member nothing more until | found my
self in bed with large wet cloth on my
head. No, am firmly resolved never TO
smoke another cigar. buffalo Courier
An Exclusive Club.
"Tm sorry, gentlemen, but ITEMS my
L....I.,.- l-nrr-l..t nIlliI n.Ln-Ir n-Il hnuf