Fisherman & farmer. [volume] (Edenton, N.C.) 1887-19??, 1889-08-30
HUM0R OF THE DAY.

The stepping stones TO success ara
'rocks. Life.
1t is the bearded lady whose face in
her fortune.-Litt.
First in war and first in peace-The
letters ''w" and '.p."
The good die young. This is particu-.
larly true of chickens.
mot in our set, " rs the false tooth re-
marked TO the old grinder
A man experiences that sinking feel
ing" when he falls overheard.
Two heads are better than one-On
the shoulders of a museum freak.
No wonder time is so often killed; it
struck every hour st. Louis Maq0zile-
A youth-the subject Of the rhyme
Spent all his strength in killing time.
years rolled On-the truth is grim
Time took his turn and slaughtered him.
Merchant Traveller.
There is no reason in the world why
''baby show" shouldn't be a bowling sue
cess.
A real life-saving station is always
managed by sailors, and not by doctors,
-Picayuae.
This is the turning period in the life OF
the farmers boy if there is grindstono
on the place. -Binghamton Republican.
When a washerwoman changes her
place ofresidence one may ask her where
she hangs out now" without using slang
When the maiden dons muslin gown,
And the dog has muZzle on too,
IT'S then we sigh to get out of town
And down by the ocean blue.
boston Courier. !
Mrs Parvenu Ito the maid) Now,
Lucy, you may do up my hair" Lucy
eyes, mum. Shall do it up in paper
or get bOX?'
A hard storm is often alluded to as q
rain of cats and dogs, but a biting storm
is probably when the fall is confined to-
CANNES exclusively Harper's Basar-
A man was arrested the other day fog
stealing an umbrella and tried to get of
by saying that he was trying to lay some
thing by for rainy day.-BostOn Post 4
The sheriff's notice thus supplies
A moral and tale;
The man who failed to advertise
Is advertised to fail.
-PhHadelphiG Press.
esPost no bills" CALCULATED Fleccy,
reading the wcll-known sign seen in
many parts of the city. "iunph! l
never do; l always prefer sending them
by the collector. ''-Judge.
When it amt rainin' it's bakin;
When it amt bakn' it blows.
When it don't blow it, a-haihn'.
So get in your coal fore it SHOWS
Detroit Free Press.
At the Jeweler s. But, Max, donb
YOU think it cxtravag CANT to give $500 for
a diamond to wear on my hand?" "NOt
at all, my dear; YOU don't consider how
much ] shall save on your gloves. -
FLiegende Blaetter.
Here lies man who laughed at death,
For many years he Knocked her.
Some say he died for lack Of breath
And some accuse the doctor.
-NeuO York Sun. q:
EtYou must stop this smoking during
business hours" said the head clerk
whats the matterl" inquired one of the
boys 1.-The boss says he can't apprecf7
ate his five cent cigar when you clerks are
putting your Henry Clays. "-Ep0ch.
Mr. Swallowtail-''Si / come 10 cons
fess great wrong | was about to do to
you and to beg your pardon. | was
about to elope with your eldest daughter"
Papa-''Come again; what was the diff
Guilty, my dear fellow! Didn't have
enough money? Let me lend you a couple
of hundred. = Chicago HeraM.
A tenderfoot whitfield beside a wood shed.
When some cowboys Of SaSaafrass City
Caused a shower Of bullets to whiz round his
head:
And he looked on their efforts with pity
For he gazed from his dream with beauti-
full smile
On the demons of carnage and bloodshed,
And murnured, "A miss Is good as a
mile
AS he carved the ball out Of the wOodshed-
-Harper'S Bdzdr.