Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1889-08-09
LIGHT MOODS.

LIGHT MOODS.
SoNa of the drygoods clork-Swing-
ing in delaine.
SARAH BERNHARDT on foot is con-
tinual walking match.
WE should be good to our Indian
proteges. They are our kind red.
IT is reasonable to suppose that some
trees are very old, especially those that
produce chestnuts
WHEN IN orator becomes n great gun
In his own estimation he is apt to DO n
good deal of n smooth-bore III the esti-
mntion of others.
ASK permission of penurious man
to interview him for the benefit of some
charitable object and the chances are
he will not give assent.
TIE room dark. tho mniden roso
To fetch match, sho said
But ho persuaded her tn s,ry
And mako II mntch instead.
THERE arc small insects that re-
'scmblc base ball players, inasmuch rs
they are liable to go out on fowls.
They ara liable to make short stop on
bats.
COULD "thc father of his county"
see how the stars i'll the field on our
flag have increased from thirteen to
forty-two he would be surprised Mt tho
growth of his family
"KEEp way from dat nigger, l tell
you," said Uncle Rubc to his sable
daughter. Hes like wot John dc Bah.
tbs lived on" slows dat?" she asked.
Low Gus nm wild, honey" WAS tho
reply.
ONE HUNDRED years ago Now Jersey
was a frontier State" 1t is so still
when You take into consideration tho
size and savagcry OF the wild game.
Where can the Jersey mosquitoes peer
be found?
AT the theater: Dlobson (rising OK
citedly)-Down with that rcd umbrella
in front! Mrs. Blobson drawing him
back)-For mercy's sake, hush upl
That amt an umbrella. It's new
spring hat.
AT recent examination of girls for
the rite of confirmation, in answer to
the question: "What is the outward
and visible sign and form of baptism 2"
the reply was: please, sir, tho
baby"
had told hcr that loved hor
Sho hnd whispered mo tho snmo;
Thon in innocent flirtntion
was caught. Tho climax came.
6ho demanded bncl her letters:
And my mind is in whirl.
For by some mistake 1 sent her
Lottprs from another girl.
MAINE, Iowa and Kansas nre said to
use up more cloves than any other
three Stntes in the Union. The area
suitable for Glove cultivation is very
limited, rs they require o peculiar kind
of soil and if prohibition ever becomes
United States law they will become
worth their weight in gold.
WHATS the occasion ?" queried the
tramp as he came TO n dozen or more
carriages before home on Fourteenth
avenue. Funeral" answered ono of
the drivers. cold or young?" "Bnby,
believe" Good I struck an old man
out here for n quarter the other day, and
1 was afraid the shock had killed
him."
The following squib has its moral
"Talk about wives" said Farmer Hnw-
buck. "I've got ono wife in million.
Why, she gets up in the mornin',
milks seventeen cows, and gets break
fast for twenty hardworkin' men by six
o'clock" "She must be very robust
woman, Hawbuck," remarked one of
his hearers. "On the contrary" put in
the farmer, "she is pale and delikit-
like. Gosh, of that woman was strong,
dunno what work she couldn't do"
A GOOD work: $50 this is where
Congress sits?" said travelling man
States Capitol for the first time. ayes, !"
was the reply; "you want to take off
your hat when you come in here. n
"Take off my hat, what for?" "Out OF
respect for our Congressman and the
great work they are doing" "What
great work did they do last session ~
"Why-er. Why, they adjourned.
$50 they did," said the traveller, I'm.
covering his head $50 they did "