The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-01-12
BRIGHT BITS.
Now in the parlor meet the pair

NOW in the parlor meet the pair
When the golden day is done.
Two forms with but one rocking chair,
Two hearts that beat as one"
Boston Courier.
A LITTLE GIRLS VIEW OF IT.-Minerva was
the Goddess of Wisdom; she never married.
NeW York Tribune.
The girl with six-foot sweetheart said she
wouldn't tell a story, but she couldn't help but
draw long beau. ~ Washington Post
THERE is one thing to be said in favor of in
vesting money in church fair lotteries. The
prize man draws is never large enough to ruin
him and send him to a drunkards grave in a
year or two. -MorriSt0U1l Herald.
EMINENT PHYSICIANS CLERK-Shall make
out Mr.. Younghusbands bill and send it to
him?
Eminent Physician Ia man with soft heart)-
Well, no, not yet He seems TO be in a seventh
heaven over the arrival of that baby, and
hate to intrude on his innocent joy.-Nep York
Weekly.
TRAMP--,You gave me a counterfeit IS bill a
few months ago.
Practical Joker-He! he he no! hol Found
it out, Ell?
"Yes, sir; and, on my information, an officer
is now looking for you. Glm me s. in good
money and I'll throw EN- of the track. Thanks
Ia, ia !'-Nei0 York Weekly.
FIRST VAssAR STUDEST-Say, girls there's
one thing we've forgotten We haven't any
-AAA
Second Student-Why, Of course Strange
We never thought Of it, LET'S have one.
Third Student-But | don't see how we can
yell without taking the gum out of our mouths
Fourth Student-Lets let the yell GO 1t
isn't very lady-like anyhow.-NeiO York Weekly
"BLoBsoN," said Dumpsey. as he met his
friend on the bank steps. New Years morning,
waiting for the building to cave in; "hsre
conundrum for you: Why is champagne like
the brightest boy in his ciass?"
Because it never gets LETT ventured
Blobson.
NO" replied Dumpsey, emp7atically;" be
cause 1t always gee. to tae head. "--BurliagtO
Free Press.
SURELY INsANE-Judge- Well deacon. you
are charged with stealing a hen FROM your
neghbor, fIr. Jones. WHAT is your defense?
Deacon Whea ley-Insanity, jedge, insanity.
Judge-Insanity: Why, 1 never knew you
were insane.
Deacon Wheatley-I was insane dat night,
shuah, jedge: cause Mistah Jones sez d It big
roostah was in de same c jOD, al / neb0er
looked 'im.-Hdrper'S Week a.
CHANGE OF BAsE.-Smth-I understand that
JobsOn's wife makes it pretty warm for him.
Somebody saw her chasing hiil around the
house with the boOtiacE the other day.
Jones-Sad! l pity the poor man. By the
way, do you remember her high school gradua-
ton essay ten years ago?
Smith-No. What was it about?
Jones-lt was beautiful thing. The subject
was ''Repose Of Character. Burlington Free
Press.
"WHAT quick tempered fellow Gapeleigh
isl
why what has he been doing nowi"
I'VE were AT dinner the other day, and Cape
leigh-who never has any use for fork you
know-was quite in earnest in what he was
pleased to call the unreasoning prejudice
against the knife at table. tie coltendsd. with
much warmth, that the knife was the proper
thing to eat with. 1t was the most convenient,
every way-st least, he found it So"
We'll. ard wba5 them
ION, simply remarked that all persons were
not gifted with a mouth like the mouth of a
river and if you Il believe it, Gapaleigh took 1t
as personal aHront, and he hasn't spoken to
me since But then he's so quicN tempered it s
hard TO get along with him, any way ."-Boston
Transcript.