davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-11-18

One dollar year will cover your doctors bill ii
you take Simmons Liver Pc .ulstor.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-11-18

PERSONAL Lee, vie ofthe Cover.
nor who has been visiting friends In this city
and Washington has returned TO Richmond.
Miss Alice l.. Dunham, formerly of this
city. waa married in Hokah. Mimi, on
Wednesday last. to Dr. E. B Johnston.
Mrs. A s. Durham was in the city on
Saturday on abort wilt to friends here.
Captain Charles A. Dempsey, 5. A, Is
in the city on short visit to Lis relatives.
Dc. +. @. Powell. who has been quite sick
for come time past, is improving.
Messrs Edwin Kemp, James Fitzgerald
aud Frank EVsns, of this CITY, who were In
ilred 10 the recent railroad collision, are all
doing well.
1t ia reported that Rev. Father O'kane,
of st. Mary's Church. will soon be transfer
red 10 another charge. 1t is hoped by
Father O'Kape's many friends of all depom-
inatic ns here that the report is incorrect.
Mr.. Luther r. Ashby, of Delaplane, was
in The city yesterday on short visit 10
friends.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-11-18

stewea oysters deliciously served at Mrs.
Rsmmel's restaurant
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-11-18
The New Discovery.

Steamed oga,ers specially at Mrs.. I. Rammep'
restaurant.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-11-18
SALE
IMPROVED CRY PROPERTY

IMPROVED CITY PROPERTY.
By virtue of deed Of trust from Henry A. Tur-
ner and wife, of record in the Clerks office Of the
CORPORATION Court in deed book No. u, page 215,
snd being thereto required by the party secured
thereby, the undersigned, trustee in said decd,
will oaor for sale at public auction, in 'front.' OF tho
Court House, Fairfax street. in the city of
AL, xxndria, Va at II o'clock m. on SATURDAY,
the 30 h day OF November, 1889, tho following
property; to wit
situate in tho city and State aforesaid BOUNDED
and described as follows: Beginning on the north
side of Queen STREET one hundred and seven feet
five incnes east OF Alfred street, and running
thence north parallel to Alfred street one hundred
feet to al alley thirteen feet seven inches wide,
leading into Alfred street Themes west on said
aley thirteen feet four inches; thence in straight
line one hundred feet to Queen street, and thence
east OIL Queen street thirteen feet fur inches to
the beginning, with the right of way over strip
of land parcel of the djoiuing lot, on the west,
and constituting the west hslf of an alley Two feet
wide between the house Oh the land above oe-
SCI ibed and the house on the lot adjoining said
land on the est, said alley extending from Qaeen
street north distance of thirty-ive feet and the
strip of land parcel of the abo described land
forming the east half of said tw feet alley being
subject to right of way in the owners of said ad-
joining lot on the west also right of way over
said alley ID feet Z inches, leading into Alfred
street.
Terms OF Sale: Cash. Conveyancing at the
cost of the purchaser.
nov1S IS THOMAS HOY, Trustee.
AZ OTICE-A Council of UNITED AMERICAN
IN MECHANICS will be organic d at Harmonic
Hall. north Fairfax stree, on FRIDAY EVEN.
ING nex', at 7:3J o'clock Persons desiring to
unite with the same will report there or to
y. b. CHEW, D.p. Natl Counsellor,
ii Brsddock House
DUFFY's NEW YORK SWEET CIDER just re.
novis GEO. McBURNEY g. SON.
NEW FRENCH PRUNEs, medium and large
novis GEO. McBURNEY 8 SON.
RRUIT JELLIES in many varieties in pals
l. and tumblers, very low at
nov1S GEO. Mc3URNEY SONS.
Jersey KNIT SHIRTS. splendid thing for
- warmth and wear, only 75c at
movie AMOS B. SLAYMAKERS.
CARDIGAN JACKETS. all wool and extra size,
" at luov16l AMOS B. sLAYMAKER'S.
WHITE TAR oAMPHoR GLoBULEs easy
w to use, and very effective as 8 moth destroy
or. For sale by E. L. ALLEN,
apo Corner King and Pitt streets.
DOCKET and TABLE CUTLERY, Scissors and
l. Razors at extra low prices at 1923 King street.
corner of Royal, wholesale and retail.
my15 1T. CREIGHTON & sON.
XyIRGINIA ARSENIC, BRoMINE AND
LITHIA, the strongest Lithia and Arsenic
Water yet discovered, for sale by
Ay29 JOHN D. II. LUNT.
EREsH SARATOGA CHIPS just received at
T. nova McBURNEY'S,
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-11-18

Norfolk oysters, large and fine, received daily
at Mrs l. fammel's restaurant
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-11-18

Drunkenness and the craving for liquor ban
lshed by dose Of simmons Liver Regulator.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-11-18

TREY Nj L FAIR.-The Young Mems
Sodalitv Lyceum fair was we'll attended last
Saturday evening There were number of
Washing onians present. The hal'oiog at
the close of the evening stood as TO lows
T.ady's diamond ring: Misses M. Kelly,
IN. Dtiefus, 6S; L. digger, 81, NJ Smith, 20
L4dy's gold watch: Misses West, Il
NJ. Wbitcomb, SO; A Hawkins, 10; a. Rey
mods, 80; NJ Lob, II; NJ Hickey, .
Table scarf: Mrs John Dounelly, Z; Mira.
NJ. B. Harlow, % Mrs. G. A Mushhsch, 6.
p -otherhood Locomotive K lein"ef's pin :
+. Childs. % C. Palmer, 81; I. Gorham,
J. Davis. ..
G,ntIeman's god watch: r. Thee Cook
49,: T @ linn. SO Robert Sninn. 90 Will.
l,an, ]. Schuler. E f LAWYER, y
God-headed cane: A. w. Gibbs, q; Il.
Dowuey. 30; F. RYAN. %; L Brill, ir, 20 ;
g Appich, s. J. p. Quinn, 80.
Gsntleman'5 gold ring: G. Padgett, 10 ;
J -pn Mulley, 4; Thomas Cation, 40.
Boy silver watch: I. Fegap, 40; 1. Nj
D il baby Misses L. o'Brien, II A. Cor
ham, 20; A. Jones, 81 G. Marshall, IA l..
Daingeri Id. II
Pohcemsn'- uniform; Measrs. Orlando
Night gil, 20; G. Brenner, IS; Frank Bet
tbs, rs
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-11-18

No harm ever done by the use Ct Simmons Liv-
er Regulator.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-11-18
Housefurnishing Goods.


anda at
b,utismd the fnetw
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-11-18

A number of colored persons we're yester-
day baptized in the river off Battery Rodg,
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05

cred, and SAID something about my
not being a. black IN l was painted.
ne opened Al the windows. ana re-
marsing pnew went OUT. hoio'ng nis
nose. Then Igot mp. said phsw and
went out' TOO, holding my nose.
darrison 10 small potatoes. Wnen
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05

CosrRARIETy.-Why do the oxen
trample the finest grain?
Why do the things we want most
tarry latest2
Why does ones bread always fall
butter-side down ?
Why does the storm ALWAYS snap
the most beautiful ok?
Why does the baby always act worse
when you have company
Why are those who scoff ut things
generally so often supsrstitious
Why is blind love intrusted with
weapons Of such awful potency {?
Why does it always rain on inau.
gural, anniversary and picnic days I?
Why does an accidental exchange
Of umbrellas always result for the
worse?
Why is it always your grsat-graud.
mothers teacup that the maid let's
fall?
Why does it always rain when
you decide TO leave your umbrella at
home?
Why is noble love 90 often Law.
ished upon those who know not gold
from dross :?
Why is ones name always found in
the last corner Of pocket.handker-
chief?
Why does car window always stay
up when you want it to 90 down, and
vice versa?
Why do certain people always cry
at weddings and have an insane de.
sire to laugh at funerals q?
Why are those who seek the drow.
~ god most ardently obliged TO wait
the longest for his coming2
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05

@ Hostctter Maginnis dropped
into Nose Shaumburgs store one day
last week, and instead Of his usual
cordial greeting the latter acccsted
him with:
"Maginnis, old boy, Use 90 mad as
ter tuyvil T.
what has reused your ire |" inter.
rogated Hostetter.
"Gott in himmel dhream las
nide | vas yelling a cote fur dwenty-
fife tollars vot yust cost fife and it
yust meek na mad, COS it vas all
dhream. / gif you my wort, yust
lose dwenty tollars by dot dhream."
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05
BIZ HEADS

was estimated at his real value; shod-
dy was not known; nobody struck
''ile." and true merit and honest worth
were the only grounds for promotion.
One hundred years ago. people did
not worry about rapid transit and
cheap transportation. but threw their
bags of grain across the backs of the
horses and uncomplainingly awsnt to
mill"
One hundred years ago. 10 tell the
truth, people generally died from nat
ural causes, while in our day thsy
step out through steamboat explosions,
railroad smash-ups, hurricanes, circu.
lar saws. and Q thousand other ways
discovered since the birth of the old.
est inhabitant.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05
BILL SNORT'S LETTER.
Ha7lson Apprshensive-Bn Snort
.Devises a Plan to Dispel HIS Mel
ancholia-TAe Pionograph as a PO-
Hticas Bo,merang -Snort Presented
With Several .Aromatic Testimonials.
[Alex. E. Sweet In Texas siffings-l
WAsnrnarox. Nov. 0.

IAlex. E. Sweet In Texas Siffings-l
WAsHrHaroz, Nov. 0.
My DEAR JoHNEY Sam Dozen
bury's Mastondonic Mammoth Min.
strel Aggregation has been giving
performances to crowded houses here
in Washington. D,ozenbury is an
old friend of mine. Ihavs known him
for years, but I'll give you our con.
versation, which will explain things
quicker:
81 suppose. Doozy, you know that
a tepid friendship exists between my
self and President Harrison" said I,
thinking to awe Doozy.
"All right. Snort. I'll keep quiet
about it. I'll not give you away. but
you ought to drop him and 90 into
some legitimate business" replied
Doozenbury. who leans toward the
Democracy.
DOGGY, ! want yotSto do me fa-
vor."
Snort. I'll make any sacrifices for
you. except I don't want you to bring
Harrison around here and try and in
troduce him to me. I draw the line
at Indiana Presidents
You know. Doozy, one of my du-
ties is to cheer up Harrison when he
has the blues, and now that Dave Hill
has been sneering AZ Clevelsnd and
making him unpopular, Ben feels
pretty bad
so Cleveland is the source Of Ben 8
depression ?
Yes. Ben is not like the sky. 1t
is most cheerful when il is bluest. 1t
is not that way with Harrison
You ought to keep him out of the
Blue Room
That wouldn' I help him. What he
needs is some sort of an ovation. BE
hasn't heard anybody say 'Hurrah for
Harrison + in long time now
Well, Snort, if I can help you in
getting up some bogus Harrison en-
thusiasm. I'll do it for your sake
You can. A feature Of your min.
strel show is q trick phonograph,
from which you grind ont sayings ol
distinguished men,
Well. what of that r
'I'll blacken my face and work that
phonograph. I'll say Listen 70 the
voice of that pure patriot. Benjamin
Harrison Then I'll grind ont some
thing about civil service reform. Sim.
ultaneously large portrait Of Harri.
SON viii appear on the stage. the band
will strike Up. Hail to the Chief I
The vast audience will rise like one
man and the cheers for Harrison will
be deafsning. Then the old man will
smile once more like q Florida alliga-
tor.
L am not sure Of that replied
Doozenbury. AT Indianapolis I got
off something favorable to Harrison,
and in consequences We lost 90 much
money that the end men had to sell
their very bones to raiss money to
pay their board bills. Ell had said
anything more in favor Of Harrison,
I might now be hunting for rail splin-
ters in my legs and smelling Of tar.
That's the sort Of . popular idol Har-
rison is where they know him. That's
why I daspise him.'
But. Doozy. It's different il Wash
ington.'
I'm not soing so take any foolish
chances, but you can say what yoa
please in favor Of Harrison on my
phonograph.'
The National Theatre vas crowded.
In box sat the entire Blaine tribe,
which struck me a. s little peculiar.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05

H Whatever tends to increase
usefulness, BY banishing pain and
suffering, will certainly secure notice
and approval. We alluds to Saliva.
ton Oil.
Insure your life for 25 cents az ainst
oil the danger of a CoDsumptive's
death BY keeping q bottle Of DR.. Bulls
Cough Syrup convenient. IL is the
best.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05

@ Unconquersble: Train Rob.
Der (entsring smoking car Throw up
your hands
Jenkins (engrossed in euchre)-
Hanged If I will. Here's both bow.
ers and the Joker.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05

one hundred years ago wedding
tours were not fashionable.
One hundred years ago. there were
no Pacific railroad subsidies.
One hundred years ago. the gin
best known was not the cotton gin.
One hundred years ago. farmers did
not cut their legs of with moving
machines.
One hundred years ago there were
no disputes about the impoliteness of
street car drivers.
One hundred years ago, horses
which could trot Q mile in 2.44 were
somewhat scarce.
One hundred years ago, there were
no disordered sewing machines for
mother to worry over.
One hundred years ago, false teeth
were not considered preferable to the
original grinders.
One hundred years ago, time and
tide waited for nobody; and now no.
body waits for time and tide.
One hundred years ago, crooked
whiskey was not known. Our fore.
fathers took theirs strainght.
One hundred years ago. the people
did not enjoy the inestimable pleas.
ure of growing about gas bills.
One hundred years ago. every young
man was not an applicant for posi-
tion as clerk or bookkeeper.
One hundred years ago. kerosene
lamps did not explode and assist wo.
men to shuttle off the mortal coil.
One hundred years ago, university
boat clubs were not entered at pool
sales like cocks in a pit.
One hundred years ago, men did not
commit suicide by going up in bal.
looms and coming down without them.
One hundred years ago, there was
no steam on the canal-even the dri.
Yer on the tow-path didn't steam up,
those days.
One hundred years ago, there were
no Turkish harems at Salt Lake, and
no Ann Eliza suing for the nineteenth
part of divorce.
One hundred years ago. England
was not very far behind the United
States in all that goes to make na.
tion powerful and progressive.
One hundred years ago. Q young
lady did not lose caste by getting her
hands wet in dish-water, or rubbing
the skin off her knuckles on a wash.
board.
One hundred years ago. the physi.
clan who could not draw every form
of disease from the system by tapping
a vein in the arm, was not much of q
doctor.
One hundred years ago. the produ.
ducsr carried his surplus produce To
market on bis horse, the products bs.
ing placed at one end of the bag and
the jug at the other end.
One hundred years ago. the condi.
tion of the weather on January Let
was not telegraphed all over the con.
tinent on the evening Of December
3lst. Things have changed.
One hundred years ago. our fathers
did not light their pipes with matches.
but carried FIRE in their pockets, in
the shape Of piece Of punk, q piece
of steel and flint.
One hundred years ago. q public
officer or other citizen could not steal
enough to make the act respectable
and insure the actor q prominent po-
Gition in the first circles"
One hundred years ago. every man
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05

kH As Eve rem arked to Adam :
"The fall has come"
As Adam remarked to Eve an they
sat outside the garden gate: We've
had an unusually early fall, have We
not ?"
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05

sA- If you are costive, don't wait
until costiyeness becomes constipa-
tion. but take Laxador at once, reeu.
larly and persistentlY until you are
cured.
Do not poison your little ones with
paregoric, laudanum, etc., but use DR..
Bulls Baby Syrnp; it contains moth.
ing injurious to the infant system.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05

No. The Dsacon-That man at the
rear Of the church just sent word that
he'd like to contribute.
The Pastor-Who 10 he?
The Deacon-Dilbacker, the button
manufacturer, of Philadel-
The Pastor-Shut up the box
Judge.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05

1 At q California fair recently
several bottles of strained honey were
put on exhibition, when q chap put
bostle OF castor oil with the rest. The
opinion of ell who tried il was that
the bee that laid il was q fraud.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05

S4- What do you mean, sir, by
swearing before my wifs2 You must
apolgizs
Pardon, monsieur ? Pardon I
do make ze apology. / did not know
ze lady wish to swear ze frst.-Cour.
rier des Etas. Unis.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05

~ Jack Toosoon I'D like you to
be my wife, Ethel. Is a go?
Ethel Unreddy-Well, it's half 20.
You 60.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05

IF you cannot conve-
niently come to the city
send rs your order
we'll fill it subject to
your approval.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05
conapletelu stocked

: completely stocked
FUR D E P ARTMENT,
FUR GARMENTS. FUR
TRIMMINGS and FUR
ROBES.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05

Don't forget that we
are complete OUTFIT
TERS-and can sup
ply you with everything
you need.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05
UNDERTAKING,

HAVING rented the property Of +. ID.
Adams at Mechanicsville, ST. Mary's coun-
ty, am now prepared to furnish caske;s,
Collins and all burial goods, and TO attend
funerals at the shortest notice and at prices
never before offered in ST. Mary's. Hop
ing TO receive a fair share of the patronage,
which win be highly appreciated by
Yours respectfully,
tB. e. HICKS.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1889-12-05

OUR PRICES for
BOYS OVERCOATS.
6 to 9 yrs, $3.50 to $50.
9 to Is yrs, $6 to $25.
Is to 10 yrs, IS to S25
KILT OVERCOATS,
8 to Z yrs, So to S15.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-10-28
MUSICAL MATTERS:

TH1 baton used by conductors of concerts IS said to have been introduced into En- gland by Spohr in 1890.
 IT is said that Q new tenor of extraordi- nary ability, named Henri Reltram, has created vast impression at Barcelona in the part of Don Jose in "Carmen."
 JOHANNES WOLFF recently played eleven pieces on his violin for Queen Victoria and she gave him diamond pin and wrote him an autograph letter.
 IN recent interview Sir Arthur Sullivan confessed that his sacred song, s.The Lost Chord" had already paid hi.n $15, 900, and still had very large sale.
 MAX STRAKosCH, who brought some of the most brilliant singers to this country that ever left the other side of the Atlantic, is in the Home for Incurables at Fordham, N. Y., paralytic.
 AN English tenor who gets about $10O for singing at a concert at home asked 1000 to sing tn five concerts in Boston. He ex- plains why he asks such an exorbitant price by saying that 1t is worth that to sing in an American provincial city.
 SIR ARTHUR SuLL1vAN's music seems to lind as much favor at the seraglio as in the operatic auditoriums of Britain. A selec. tion was recently sent to the Sultan at his imperial request by the Duke of Edinburgh, and Abdul Hamid was so delighted that he conferred the Medjidie order on the com- poser.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-10-28
ACCIDENTS AT SEA.

From the annual report of Inspector General Dumont of the Washington Steamboat Inspection service it is shown that during the fiscal year. ending June 30, 1889, there were B accidents at sea, resulting in the deaths of 3O1 persons, or Sl more thanilast year. Of those lost, 92 were passengers and 20 officers or hands on the vessels. It may be remark ed, that, as compared with the previous years. there was an increase of 300 in vessels and 2,OS1 in the number of of hcers licensed, and when it is considered that 55O, 100000 passengers were car ried on steam vessels during the year, one is forced to acknowledge, with Mir Dumont, that the efficiency of this important service has been singu- larly increased. With 73 per cent less than steam vessels in service in 1875, there were 5O6 deaths by accidents. There has been, therefore, reduction of 54 per cent in that interesting direc- tion. The inspector general congratu- lates the subordinate officers for their esprit de corps in faithfully carrying into effect the laws enacted by congress, advocates g better schedule of salaries among his own officers, and condemns the use of naptha gas as motive power.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-10-28
PRESS THUNDER.

OYSTERS are very self-possessed creatr ures. They never turn red when they get into stew.
 THE book that tells how 8 person may live on $50 a year was probably meant for camp in the back woods, or it may be read as one of the thrilling romances of the year.
 TIE sons of Adam have always wanted the world to take them at their own valuation and pay them every Saturday night; but the world has always declined to do that.
 A YOUNG woman who had just returned from Europe says that while she was in Southern France she visited town called Nephew, or Cousin, or Niece, or something like that.
 even to eat vegetables that have been in the same refrigerator with meat, but the same fellow was once caught kissing butchers daughter.
 THEY say they have discovered wonder full salt lake in the interior of Africa. This Is good news. They can now pack some oi the stories they send from there and pos sibly they won't spoil before they reach us.
 ONE day recently, not having any thing particular to do, the captain of a schooner lying i'll Tampa bay counted the number o1 sharks in sight, and he made the figures 76O As he is cross-eyed and near-sighted he allows that some of the fish must have got away while he was counting, and are to be. Jumped in at about fifty. AT the foot of Sand mountain, Ala, there is a large box bearing transcription '.Drop coin in the slot and draw out whisky at the rate of two dollars g gallon. '' This automatic bar is known as 8 "blind m opyoio oA for running this box bar-room escaped convic- tion, as it was impossible to prove his own ership.
 Our in Ohio they want "style" even in housework, as the following letter received lately by the Castle Garden superintendent from Youngstown, O., will show: ''M Su- perintendence Castle Garden-Dear Sir: ] would ask this favor of you. Air they ane gerls thair that would like to get a good plase to live in a family of 3 growen persons too doc house work it would halter be one with some stile and not under teenty years old and one that iSe ones and can be trust Nothen but mise and good looken enc will file the bil. Pleas answer"
 A LETTER just received from London says that the other day 8 thief broke into man. sion in Belgravia early in the morning and found himself in music-room. Hearing footsteps approaching he hid behind Q screen. From 2 to o'clock the eldest daughter had a lesson on the piano. From 8 to o'clock the second daughter took Q singing lesson. From to 10 o'clock the eldest son had a violin lesson. From 10 to Il o'clock the other son took 8 lesson on the flute. At il all the brothers and sisters as- sembled and studied the ear-splitting piece for piano, violin, flute and voice. The thief staggered out from behind the screen at Il 80. and, falling at their feet, cried out ''For heavens sake, have me took to the station, but cheese that bloomin' bandv'