Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1889-11-07
His Golden Opportunity Came.


There was grocery just across from the
depot, and ON bench under the window
were seven large watermelons. A short,
cadaverous-lOoking colored man sat on a
baggage truck looking across at the gro
Gerry After a bit one of our crowd
sauntered up to him and carelessly OBJ
served:
''Some fine melons over there -
Deed dey is, boss, was the reply.
"Do coIored folks ever eat watermel-
ons?"
'Does dey? Does dey eat water
mellyons? should reckon to..consider dat
dey did,
lis that so? How many colored men
about your size would it take to get away
with one large melon?''
''How many? Say, boss, pears to me
you doan' lib in dis kentry."
mo; I'm just over from England. y
''Dat accounts. Yer doan' know us.
How many would it take? You'd better
ak how many mellyons would be wanted
fur one Guild pusson named Josephus
Pardon.
''You don t mean you could eat whole
one?"
'Doan' I. If l can't eat de hull seben,
Ill go off to de swamp an die!''
We Clipped in to buy up the lot and
give the man the golden opportunity of his
life. The melons were brought over and
laid in a row, and Josephus removed his
hat and coat and let out his leather belt
three notches, and sat down with his back
braced against box.
Rip went the knife as he got the word,
and the storm had burst. He cut the mel
on into four pieces, dropped the knife,
and in less than two minutes by the watch
nothing was left but heap of rinds and a
handful of seed. A second was rolled over
to him, and he gained five seconds on his
other time. On the third he lost ten sec
onds, and ON the fourth nearly minute.
He cut the fifth, ate quarter of it, and
then stood up to inquire:
''Was it 'spected dat was to eat de hui
seben right DOWN."
''Oh, no. The idea was to see how
many you could eat at once.
''Wall, lie lettle disappointed in myself.
| did believe ] could git away wild de lot
in bout half an hour, but ize sOrter filled
up on TO- Reckon / haint feelin' overly
well, an dat de dozen turnips / ate dis
mawnin hev sorter held me off. If you
would be so kind as to give me bout FIVE
minutes to finish de rest Of dis, an den let
me take de odder two down dar' in de
bush by myself, I'm believin dar' won't
be nothin left by sun high. "
He soon finished the fifth and then took
a melon under each arm and made for a
thicket down the track. Twenty minutes
after he left the train came along, and as
we rode past the thicket Josephus rose up
with solitary melon in his hands, bowed
his thanks and shouted:
''Ize gwind ter do it, white man. It's
de only one left, an I'll git away wild him
befo' you dun got down to Petersburg!''
New York Sun
Facts About Indians.
The Indian agencies are sixty-one in
number.
The number of houses occupied by In
dians is q. 232.
The number of Indians living on and
lands is 1872
The total Indian population of the
United States Is 247, 761.
The number of Indian church members
in the United States is q, 1858.
There are ten Indian training schools in
different parts of the union.
The number of Indians IN the United
States who wear citizens dress Is 81 ,621.
The number of Indians In the United
States who can read English is %, 595.
The number of Indians In the United
States who can read Indian languages is
1902.
By the explosion of boiler at the Bel
laire blast furnaces at Bellaire. O.. prop