davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The National tribune., 1889-07-18

FUN FOR THE DARKEY. FUN FOR THE MULE.
useful equine mulatto the important function
be performed in putting down the rebellion.
Tho average American mule has not the soft
fur fine as dressed sealskin aud smooth as
coffin vamish nor the rich shades OF colorlng
worn by his pampered kinsfolk of Spain or
Cvprus or Smyrna. AS 10 skin he was habtu-
ally neither soft nor shining-he was simply
tough As 10 color, his muzzle was always
Nhifish rs If fresh from n meal -tnh, but other
wise he was more various than delcctable-
sometimes yellow sometimes dun, sometimes
sorrel but oftenest darkly, deeply, bcauti-
fully hay. Second cousin 10 the New Mex
Jean burro. but happily gniltless of any
traccable relationship to the disreputable
Texas mustang. his aspect was liahie to be
as onc-sit,ed as q Louisiana riOi-lT negroes
killed aud one white man slightly wounded.
But texture and color apart the harmless,
unspeakable servitor of our march and camp
was doubtless the peer Of any that the cfiete
mDnarchies OF Europe or the East can boast.
he had 40 overplus Of style about him,
But HE WAS RELIABLE, HE WAS SINCERE,
his muscularitv was conceded by all. His facial
angle was a convex curve. which somewhat
impaired lis beauty. but not his utility. Some
knew hin who did not love him; few named him
except 10 praise, after reasonable aequaint-
ance. HIS air OF innocent gravity WAS some
bic and fatal error! lie could look as imbecile
as 3 rustic fop playing Glory Haileluiah on
an accordion. lie could look rs guiielcsS as
the youth who murdered his own father and
mother aud then begged the judge 10 have
mercy on q poor orphan. He could look as
soulful A. q law clerk summing up 60 jury Of
one with his arm around IL. He could look as
sober a. though his whole intellect were grind
ing ou lhe plus and minus Of some unsoiyed
problem like that for example, which the
Book az Mormon and Mahomet's Koran and
Clarke's Commentaries. with all their attention
20 detail have neglected-whether Aaron's
golden calf Was liOlsfein OF jersey. Sleepy
OF aslr-p he may have seemed. but let some
small darkcy imp Of mischief tweak his patient
ear then note how swiftly that magnetic hO0f
viii list the tweaker % pearly seat amidst
the celestial cherubim. DIRECT aud speedy cir
cuit Of nerve telephone here manifest. without
the Intervention Of any dilaiory central office.
His dropping lids were thus but the token Of q
measnrrlcss content. which crayed not the mere
bric-a brac aud gum crops of existence. but WAS
liallc g. shift rs specific gravity IL any missit
perfume came between the wind and has no
hilifv. and explode in a sndden touch and 10
style rocket ike, tTiEger-like flashing.
he GOULD szfILE LIKE A HEAVENLY BLESS
TEG.
His expressive yawn was widely eminent;
without II no mule WAS genuine. HIS bray,
opening clear and soBorous. like the report Of
q Judiciary committee. rapidly shaded OF into
a sucress50n n disembOdied shrieks and discm-
boReied groans that sent thrills OF suicidal
deiirium through all the encireling camps. No
further seek bis general merits 10 disclose !
They developed constantly on the sensitive
plate of our regard, and we have waited long
The National tribune., 1889-07-18


profanity was the staneh. infalible test Of
bis identity. Huge quad riIateral oaths. shinged
with birthstone and fFinged with FIRE, were
the soft relaxatiOns Of his happier hours.
Blue, blisiering maledietiOns, heeked with
white foam, marked the approach Of his par
oxysInal frenzies, and no postpOncment on ac-
count Of the weather Cruelty, uncl6aked and
unleayened, lumpy and rocky, was the encrgiz-
ing motor Of his existence, and his anti-phlo-
CYSTIC treatment always insured the dispersion
Of the mules vitality TO his extremities hence
those kicks.
To the tender nerces Of this loscl vile were
committed by inscrutable fate the career and
destiny Of the speechless undecipherable mule
Following the current aeceptaton Of the nor.
NAL order Of things in civil life,
whEs Man, LITTLE LOWER TRAN THE
ANGELS.
bestrides a mule uBquestionabIy possessed Of
the devil, he starts on the basalt road 10 perdi-
tiOn safe 20 arrive. But IN this zigzag OF mill
tary contradictions the man and the beast, the
sem i-seraph aud the bFeVet horse have exc
cuted mysterious transnigratiOn Of functions,
until "gravtation, working tother way, lifts
all things skyward." The honest, intelligent
mule restores the equilibrium Of robust virtues
lost through the depFayed aud dissOlute driver
raises the average Of merit and the sum total Of
achievement, go that the credit for their Joint
share Ia the grand eliInacteric will be AS endur-
ing as the solemn temples, the great globe itself
Under such iRauspicious guidance
aud control, the Army Mule, luckily pachy-
dermatons, proceeds TO his sanguinary exploits.
Lowest in rank Of created beings assigned a
part In the drama, fame held 10 him no tessel-
ated rewards for excess of zeal. He was not
built for general range of cynosnre business.
For the splendid Immortality Of sculpture he
was ludicrously inapt, while ifpainting deigned
10 give him grudged space, it would ever
The National tribune., 1889-07-18
FOR THE LADIES.

- Aher being totally bliad for Is years Mrs.
Todd LATHE, of Bronson. Mich, suddenly
cured. The first person she her daughter
aud her first remark was, "Myl how you've
grown"
~ The mao who beqHesihed bali of his estate to
his vile IA long sbGlFEfHHinCd single after his
death. with y provision THAT the other baif he
given her ia case she married again. as II costs
more TO Keep two than one was daisy.
An immense oTseF faF eotsots has been received
In Paris frem BrRzii. The explanation ~ that tho
enaRcipated slave omen have ialcn 10 wearing
them,
--sIadame-Dn op my hair. Feiiec, while / am
down 10 breakfast
Fciicc-ier. madame which enloFg
Madanr-fiic black. please; Im going to a fI-
BefHt.-- biughap4f0n RFTsibilcaH.
The National tribune., 1889-07-18

for somebody 70 take of blue print of his
ground plan and front elevation. The posses
sOr Of many virtues. poor bot honest with a
large circulation aud but little local influence,
EaEaciOEs and serene he stood. thick Of bead
tough of hide, hard Of heel. the progered hero
81 the expressive army shibboleth: Here's
youF male"
The plni0nie, speeehless qHadruped. mule,
like fhe PiaiOnic GeatheFless biped, man, after
being inspected IN the hOof. was obliged 10
graduate through the three military degrees Of
recruit. soldier and veteran.
We AT remember those recruiting days:
those hrst companies o. picked meu-m0stly
picked before they were ripe; when the fray
WAS curtaiBed behind song and hurrah, the
cataract obscUred by tie rainbow Who eau
forget the wrathiul buzz and fermont, the
wild tossing and Writhing and moaning Of an
aroused people; the fierce uprising; the keen
TszOr-edge Of fervOr; the enrolling aud drill.
ing and marching and evOlDting IN the moon
lit squares aBd streets; the nocturnal vista
The National tribune., 1889-07-18
ieoPYRIGnTED BY FRANK O. CARPENTER, 1901
Special Correspondence NArroEAL TRIBUNE.
CArRo FcypT 1899

FOLLOWED q tele-
phone line in driving
from Cairo TO the PyFa-
mids to-day. and as /
waded through th g
sands from the edge of
the Nile Valley up the
plateau w II ere old
Cheops stands, | could
see a party of foreign
ers playing lawn-ten-
mis- in the court of the
hotel which has been
built near its base.
Il h o next improve
ment in undermining
Egypt will probably be
"a cable road running
to the top Of these great
piles of stone, and al
ready a flagstaff has
been planted in the
very center of the apex
of the biggest of them.
The Pyramids are dis
appointing when you
first see them from
Cairo. They look bazy
and ghost-Iike as they
loom up out of the
sands of the desert,
The National tribune., 1889-07-18

bydrophobia, or a camel
charged with dynamite. Marching triumph
ant home, knee.sprung but rrcpressible, his
large, luxuriant ears were tremulous with the
Intoxicating emotions of the hour, and
HIS DoUBLE-TURRErED VOICE
was loudcst In the wild acclaim of victory.
Long years he lived, 10 may be, wearing upon
his knigIHly shoulder the proud insignia OF his
service, tho indelible brand of honor, which
no humility Of vocation could degrade nor
pursc-prond aristocracy of money hagS-thc
basest yet known on earih--c0n TENN with
impunity. And when the end comes, as come
It must, even to the longevOus mule, then
spcechless and unspcakablc, ut last and etcr-
naily, the Hag under which ho toiled might be
put to worse uses than that Of covering his
cmaciated frame as it is trundled off to the
g'ue factory | mean no disrespeCt to the flag,
That flag is our flag Man has always and
everywhere sought in hammered bazonries the
symbols OF sovereign power. Everywhere
and Mt all times some emblem Of might which
confessed no mighter. has led embattled hosts
to triumph, and taught heroic spirits how
sweet it is to die. The banner becomes the
capitalization Of the Nations life and the
embodiment of her glory, until fighting be-
meath 1t IL patriotism. dying for lis immortality,
ana treachery to II Is the backest of crimes. Our
ilag of beauty aud renown, descending 10 us from,
stainless sires by shining pathway pure as
thAt uown which the holy grail slid from the
opening heavens, won q new luster in the
hands of our generation. Overlapping each
other III the crowduE profnsion of their golden
legends, every stripe of our banner is weighty
with its battle roll,
EVEN As EACH SILVER STAR BURNS,
the prime jewel In crown of vaorous
achievement Douelson and Shiloh and Vicks.
burg. Nashville and Murfreesboro and Kene-
saw, Winchester and South Mountain aud An
tietam, Gettysburg and the Wilderness and
Appomattox-these and 800 morel How the
dcathless names eild the respondent folds OF
tho proud ensign OF Liberty! Flag of the conti-
neut, rivers and seas; flag Of a reunited country;
flag OF the glorious past aud of the dimiesI
future; flag of freedom; flag of the world
Washed in the blood Of the brave and the bloom
iug.
Snaiched from the altars Of insnlent foes.
Bntning with star-fire-. bat never consuming,
Flash It's broad ribbaHds OF lily aud rose
Let us cherish the remembrance Of the days
when we followed Ii and fought for il. Among
the soft, delicious echoes which float booming
across the ocean Of memory. will sometimes
come, whether we welcome il or not. the sunny
recollection of the seductive wink, the tunefui
bray, aud the electric kick of tho Army Mule.
The National tribune., 1889-07-18

carded his agony, he ac-
cepted tho wido-open
policy of his castigator,
and crunched his bar
mecide fcasts, lacerated
and scarified, hoping
the brighter day. Bap-
siized with fire adjacent
For, remote, or even with
its rumors aud reilec-
, ,tions, the pattering
skirmish shots of ac-
! tion, he ut length be-
came a veritable veter-
an, and could upon oc-
i teasion thirst or seem
: to thirst for gore, with
.aIl the mad ferocity of
n sheen smitteu with
The National tribune., 1889-07-18

ti0ns Hifh ffe and
drum 10 she Vcrandas
Of oTatoriczl patriots
iOF a Hisbt-eap " Of
inspiring speech. alter
nated with raids on
Euspected disloyaIists
20 denaDd the prompt
up hosting of tie Star
spaHgied Banner Sax
On aud Norman aud
Dane were we. or Celt
or Ieuton ia birth or
descent but all u ug
then crystalized in the
alembic u patriotism
into the FIRST generation
Ofunafuiteratcd Amer
Jeans. 10 the bIasphe-
nous eilalieuge Ofseceg-
The National tribune., 1889-07-18

shudder, like fine ladys bare shoulder vital
lied by musketo bite. But he is helpless and
supine. With the final linking together Of
the detached tackle into one engirding gearage.
the first step in his humiliation is com pletcd.
aud the paintings of his suppressed fury mingIe
with the ehokings of his self-contcmpt. From
that hour he is changed mule. I1aFncssed
and hamiliated, ahased and abashed. the higher
regions of pride and Independence wherein he
has praneed with all the lofty grace of thor
oughbred. know him no more forever.
In this clinging, clanking harness toggery
cribbed aud confined he is led out 10 where
five shame faced fell9w-martyrs wait 10 endure
with him the eliminating innignty. The
mule units are now to be transmitted into the
Aule team for the glory OF Yankee Doodle.
and an entirely novel program OF aerobatic
niarycls is 10 he enacted.
No sooner have the predestined ST. been
with infinite patience aud circumspcctiou
aligned and coupled aud 10 the nonslrous
vehicle deity attached than down they all 20
ia heap, rolling plunEing mass of offensive
paftisanship in one dusty burial bient En-
tangled, PROSTATE. wriihing like coil oi
rattiesnakes; each eager nose and active heel
and iufied tail points al ways at once. like a
mariners needle la thunder storm.
The mule recruit has thus rapidly developed
into the mule soldier IL has been summariIy
mustered IN, with role around his lower lip.
Tasping ~ 10 raWneks, bat without any very
searching inquiries A. 10 his uncertain age h.s
wholly immaterial sex, his supetauous name
or his complicated " social status" lie has
been blaeksmithed as to honf, aud vcterinaricd
a. TO shoulder. lie must now march forth "a
The name Of Union aud emancipation. bul
must first be introduced 10 Isis commander
and SO must you my beloved You who have
bushes 10 blush for your species prepare tc
blush them now.
THE ARMY MULES COMMANDER.
The army teamster, with the rare and radi
ent exceptions OF those who. like the immortal
nominee 0i the Seattle caucus, carried hare IN
aud pure heart. may safely be diagnosed as !
I chronic malady Of war times When his slim
sweetheart the dove eyed, fiat-chested maiden
OF the Wabash, a suffering siren, to be conrted
/ only on the installment plan, sent him to tht
| field. il was IN full confidence that he woull
/ not be lost TO her foreveT-not he. The fore
ordained autocrat Of the speechles4, unspcak
I able mule, his coTn-fed, lank Delilah shrewdf,
The National tribune., 1889-07-18
TIE PYRAMIDS IN 1889
Our Correspondent Climbs these Mount
aims of Stone and Calls Upon the
Sphinx.

Commonplace View or the Most Wonderful
Monuments OF Iiist0ry-HeliOpois, where Joseph
C0urted His Wlfe-a Visit to an Ostrich Farm
and n Look Mt 500 Osirichcs-0 Ostrich Raising,
and How 10 Is DOne-What the Birds are Worth,
and What IL Costs TO Keep Them-Daby Os-
trichcs aud an Ostrich Incubator.
The National tribune., 1889-07-18

ancient times in many parts Of the East, and
Is much used also in most of the countries
around the Mediterranean Sea, and in the
mountainous parts Of South America. Great
care Is bestowed on the breeding Of mules in
Spain and Italy, and those particular districts
are highly esteemed. In ancient times the
sons Of Kings rode on mules, and they were
volea ia chariots They are still used to draw
fhg carriages Of Italian Cardinals aud other &C.
clesiastical dignitaries." Aud more 10 the same
effect
We respectfully submit that here is we'll
buttressed certificate Of character which fully
justified the Government in assigning to this
The National tribune., 1889-07-18

right in the desert, ms are indeed, ,,all of the 60
Pyramids of greater or less size which are
found in different parts of Egypt. The south
windows of the house would have good view
OF the Pyramids OF sakharah, which loom mp
in Reometrical figures of blue upon the site of
old Memphis, and on the front porch you could
have as n stationary ornaments in your great
yard below the old stony-eyed Sphinx who sat
with her paws stretched out before her in this
same position when these Pyramids were built.
aud who is one of the few females in the world
who grow old without losing their beauty.
The Pyramids themselves are by no means
young. The King who built the Great Pyra.
mid for his tomb lived a matter of 5000 odd
years before Christ. and he put up this pile of
stones to contain his royal bones. Now, nearly
5000 years Inter- We Americans climb TO the
top of his monument and go into the chambers
in its interior, which he thought would outlast
the ages. With magnesium lights We explore
the recesses of the rooms in which he expected
to be secluded for eternity, and San Francisco
man yesterday had a detective camera by
which he took number of photographs in the
heart of this old rulers tomb. He did not,
however, find the corpse of the King This was
taken out long ago, and histary does not record
what became of 1t. All we know of him comes
from Herodotus, who says he was vicious,
The National tribune., 1889-07-18

You see tho Pyramids when you leave the
city. They increase rapidly in size rs you
conc nearer TO them, and at the base of the
desert they look at first like huge heaps of
stone. disappointment comes over you, and
you feel that the travellers of all ages have lied.
A half mile farther aud you are ut their base.
You now change your opinion. The Pyramids
are more wonderful than they have ever been
painted, aud their immensity grows more and
more upon you ms you look. Standing in tho
middle of one of the sides of the Great Pyra-
mid, il seems as though the whole sky was
walled with stone. and tho top towers above
your bead, almost kissing the white clouds
which sometimes float in this clear Egyptian
sky. The Great Pyramid has base covering
- acres and IL Herodotus told the truth, it
was during his lifetime about half as high
again rs the Washington Monument Tho
stones within it 10. day would make $50 such
monuments, and fully one half of ID, / should
judge, has been carted away to make buildings
In Cairo. The Great Pyramid To day is more
than 300 feet lower than Herodotus described
IL, aud its sides do not measure more than 7J0
feet. IL is an almost solid mass of stone, made
In great blocks, which are piled up in the shape
of steps, growing smaller in size as they reach
the top, and terminating in fiat platform
large enough ON which to build house 30 feet
square A house so built would be iS2 feet
above the desert IL would command a view
of the Nile Valley for miles, aud its back win
dows would look out upon the great. billowy
plains Of yellow sand. This Pyramid Is built
The National tribune., 1889-07-18

ing me from one ledge to another, they howled
out in barbaric sing-song gibberish of Eng
lish, interspersing it with Cherokee whoops.
Their song was something like this:
"Ali right Very goodll
Hard work. Good boys!!
Mr. Frank saisfiedli
On top pay money"
This was continual reminder Of my indebt-
edness to them, and they enforced their song
with more numerous jerks the higher we rose.
They were surprised when / refused to give
them any baeksheesh until we got to the bot
tom, and they lifted me down with somewhat
the same jerk with which they pulled me up.
The National tribune., 1889-07-18
EsrRAxcE TO RRrpar.

arc Cling great jars of water and bearing
them away upon their heads as they did in the
days of Rcbeeca when Jacob gave her that kiss
aud formed the scene which Italian artists love
10 paint; and on out into the country through
seven miles OF this greenest of the green Val
ley OF Egypt. You pass caravans OF camels
ridden by Bedouins, who are carrying mer-
ehandize into Cairo to sell. The air Is rs fresh
as America in springtime, and the sweet scent
Of the grass and the clover Is blown into your
face by the bracipg wind from the desert.
The National tribune., 1889-07-18

In coming down from the top of the Pyra-
mid my Bedouin guides landed me at the op-
posite corner from whence / started, and here
was a camel ready to take me 10 the Sphinx.
It is only about quarter of mile from one
to the other. bat / climbed OF aud rode through
the sand 10 pay my respects TO the old lady. l
visited her when / was in Egypt eight years
ago. and | find her changed for the better.
Since that time the sand has been scraped
away from her sides and breasts. aud there are
half dozen iron ears standing about her fore
paws ready to perform further excavations. A
little railroad has been built reaching TO her
very feet, and this is for the swrting away of
the sand. | stopped beside her and took pho
tograph of her as she is to-day. The sands of
the desert and the winds which sweep over
Egypt have had some effect upon her body.
Her great face is much the same rs il was when
the Pyramids were built, and some of the red
which it is said used to be her complexion still
shows OF her left cheek under the eve. / wish
| coald give you some idea of the extent of the
Sphinx. 1t is, yOu know the head and bust of
n woman upon the body of a lion, and it was
carved out of the rock which here stood upon
the desert. 1t has been noted among the peo-
The National tribune., 1889-07-18


guessed, would listen
10 the battles diss0nant
tEundcrs from remote
security, and come back
10 her unshOt and an
sabcTed, but covered
all over with yicarious
glory-which he did.
His previous occupa-
tions had varied from
cord wood carpentry TO
slaughter. house sur
gerry, but he had always
been disposed 10 shed
perspiratiOn with ex.
lreme difidence. He
was mostly red heade d.
Addicted also 10 excess
Of raw spirits, tobacco
and other ab0mina-
tioDs. His eye was
aglare with hate
every glance a stab.
lie had a torpid liver,
and was no " trustee Of
beauty" Freckies were
lfa fradn.tnnrk aud
The National tribune., 1889-07-18

then went inside the Pyramid and exam
iued the great chambers, which. built Of gran
ito blocks so closely joined that you cannot
put pin between the creviees, are quite as
wonderful as the outside construction. The
Queens chamber is II feet wide by Is feet long,
and its ceiling is 20 feet high IL is as dark as
the night which Moses spread over Egypt
when he wanted to soften the heart of Pharaoh
but tho night was turned into day by the burn
ing OF magnesium, and we could see the won
derfuE polish on the walls. The Kings cham
ber is as big as a country church, and its cell
ing is 10 feet high. 1t would take 125 yards Of
ingram carpet to cover its floor, aud it is lined
entirely with granite. The ceiling is rooted
with niue enormous slabs of granite, each of
which is Is feet long. and the only thing with
in it is great sarcophagus just long enough to
contain the body of man. and about three
feet wide and three feet deep. There are
other chambers in this Pyramid, and, consider
ing the machinery of the times, its structure is
wonderful Its cost can hardly be estimated
in the money OF to-day. On the outside Of It.
before it was mutilated. was the record Of the
radishes, onions aud garlic which had been dis
tributed among the workmen and these cost
over 81. 100000. The Pyramid itself must have
cost many millions and after all it is nothing
but the tomb of King.
The National tribune., 1889-07-18
NATIONAL TRIBUNE: WASHINGTON c. THURSDAY

supplies that smootbed wars wriul1led front
and queled its camorihg emptiness. Prodded
and hayed, until his staggering knees, his welt
fretted hanches and his bloody nostrils pla-
The National tribune., 1889-07-18

In going out of Cairo you cross one of the
finest iron bridges in the world, which passes
over the Nle aud which is guarded by great
bronze lions Mt either end. You 20 by the tax
office. where farmers bringing chickens, pig
cons aud grass or vegetables into Cairo are
stopping TO pay tax upon them before they
can offer them for sale; on past branch of
the Nile. where naked men are standing in the
water and sIapping clothes up and down upon
stones in washing tbem; by wells where women
The National tribune., 1889-07-18

and you do not reaIize their ago or ex-
tent In driving to them you go through a
long avenue of acacia trees, the branches Of
which intertwine overhead and form grand
arbor as straight as n line and as ilat as a floor
As you look down this avenue the trees appear
to grow smaller and smaller, and they finally
terminate in little patch of light as big around
as the head Of boys drum, and this patch IS
at tho base of the desert. This road is built
about 10 feet above the fields of the Nile Val
ley. On each side of you the green stretches
away to the north and south as far as the eye
can reach. and you sec groves of palm trees,
eameIs and doukeys farmers plowing and
women carrying water, together with the other
strange country scenes which make up the
Oriental types of this land of the Arabian
Nights.
The National tribune., 1889-07-18

Continued on 5th pageJ