St. Paul daily globe., 1889-09-02

TOT. 1Ou see, the bird had not talked
before, because it was too young to
talk. AS soon as he got old enough to
talk it spoke the words most familiar to
it-words it had heard Sophia ding at
and into Leander every day, week after
week, month after month. This was
natural enough. There is nothing new
what we are all doing.
The task of picturing Leander's mis-
cry were vain for us to undertake. In
adequate to that task, we shall simply
say that Leander suffered-suffered for
days. for weeks, for months, yet suf-
fered in silence, for the auStere horrors
ofpthe probate court had terroriZed him.
PerhapS-ah, who shall say-perhaps
he was somewhat buoyed up by the dim
and twinkling hope that some time
Cfalse word y his reward would be har-
vested in the death-the natural but
none the less righteous death-of this
wretched bird. At any rate. Leander
bore his martyrdom mutely.
sit must be-" said Lawyer Beebe,
ever and anon; sit must be sweet
consolation toyou to have this perpetual
reminder of your sainted wife-to hear
continually the echo of deceased's voice
and to feel that, although she lives only
in the spirit, the endearing epithets
with which Sophia's melodiOus con-
tralto caressed your ears are still pre-
served by this inspired bird. Leander,
you are the blessed beneficiary OF a
special providence"
Leander never made any audible ans
wer to congratulations of this charac-
ter. But his face spoke volumes, and
even then the sentiments that surged
hnSnn1
Meanwhile. Dinkety, the parrot, reSur-
rected and revived Sophia in every
particular except that of the flesh.
A demoniac activity had now sue
ceeded to that semi-comatose condi
tion which characterized the earlier
years of the miserable bird. Some
times it thrust its ceruiean head out
between the bars of its zinc cage and
shrieked: "You think you're going to
get my money, eh? Leander. Leander,
I'll fool you yeti" At other times,
standing upon its adamantine beak and
rasping the air with its horny claws, the
grOtesque creature cried: ''Never
marry for money, Leander-never
marry for money!'' Then again-but
why enumerate the thousand prepos-
ferrous tortureS which the heartlesS
reptile inflicted upon Leander? Hour
after hour, day after day, week after
week, Dinkety. the parrot, performed
its acrObatic mOnstrOSitieS and shrieked
shrilly the old-time objurgations and
reproaehes which Sophia bad used so
industriously.
81 will bear it patiently" said Lean
der to himself. My time will come /;
the parrot will die natural death, and
then the $4,000 shall be mine. / shall
be happy then-rich and happy-and l
shall have a parrot for dinner every
day!"
But one morning when Leander was
reading in newspaper he turned pale
and trembled violently. His eyes had
caught an article headed 'FactS About
Parrots" The article started out in
thiS wise: sat recent meeting of the
French academy, Prof. Achille Sanin-
Brillait made the interesting statement
that OrnithologiSts were now agreed
that the life of the average parrot ex-
ceeded 100 years.
Leander gasped; just then he heard a
vOice-hiS SOphia's voice-raSp out in
file-like tones of eXultatiOnI ''Neyer
marry for money, Leander-never marry
for money!"
Leander gave it up then and there
He gathered himself together, pro-
ceeded to a cheap lodging house,
rented room, turned on the gas. went
to bed, and died miserably of broken
heart. By chance as he departed from
his own house he left the front 1OOr
open. and vagrant cat, wild with hun
ger, entered, and after three-hOurs'
battle vanquished DiDkety, the parrot.
and ate it. So, after all, Dinkety died
the death natural to parrots, by which
we mean violent death, which, we
aver, should be natural to parrots even
though ornithologists and probate
courts hold otherwise.
The minister who preached Leander's
funeral sermon was very eloquent, for
the estate paid handsomely for it.
..'Ninthly," said the minister, 1--WE draw
this lesson from the life of the deceased :
Never to -"
But why quote the minister. since
you who have read this true narrative
must certainly ere this have gathered
the moral hereof?