The Durham recorder. [volume] (Durham, N.C.) 1879-19??, 1889-09-25

4
of it was carried overheard, so to
speak.
"By thunder" gasped Mr.. Bow
ser, as he regarded the damage, aud
he carefully washed all the lather
off that side to closer inspect the
calamity. Investigation proved that
the damage was not beyond repair,
and he renewed the lather and went
ahead.
| In the course OF the next fifteen
minutes Mr.. BowSer must have re-
moved as many aS two hairs from
his face, and he uttered fully 100
aghs and >grunts. He tried the
razor in his right hand and in his
left, and in every conceivable posi-
tion, and he brushed on the lather
until a hoe would scarcely have
scraped 1t off.
"You see," | heard him saying to
himself, "a fellow has afool around
awhile to get confidence in himself.
expected it would take me about
half an hour this time, but inside of
a week Ill make a clean shave ill
side Of FIVE minutes. There-that's
a good job"
| He wet a towel and wiped the
lather of his face and look in the
glass. The result astonished him.
So far as he could see he had not re-
moved one single beard. He had
scraped off the lather, but the beard
was still there. He growled away
for awhile, and then mixed a fresh
lot Of lather and brushed it on, and,
after satisfying himself that the
razor's edge was all right by cutting
a hair pulled from his, head, he laid
it against his chin. He gradually
turned it up and began to scrape,
and | heard him sDftly saying:
Now, then, I've got the real
hang oft. ! was carving it too
fiat. There's trick"
Two things suddenly happened.
| He cut the left corner Of his moust-
ache off and gashed his chin at the
same stroke, and the next instant
he bounded into the hall and shouted
for me.
well, what is it?" I-asked as
rose up.
Look here! I'm fatally woundedr'
he cried. as he danced around the
hall.
Let me see. Why, it's nothing
but slight cut. Let me wash the
iather of"
| Ii was a lively cut, and it bled
freely for a quarter Of an hour, dur
ing which time Mr.. BOwser dld a
great deal Of signing and groaning
and forgot about his moustache.
When | had plastered up Oh cut he
returned to the glass, discovered
that his moustache was lopsided, and
wheeled on me to explain:
Look at 1t! Look at that, Mrs.
BOwser!'
ayes, you haggled your moust-
ache. III get the shears and trim
it off,"
Never! Keep right away from
me! Mrs. Bowser, your plot has
been discovered"
Don't be so foolish, Mr.. Bowser.
told you YOU couldn't shave your
self"
ut is all as plain as day now!' he
continued. rs he upset the lather
cup and walked through its con-
tents; you probably figured that
| Id cut my throat. You were sit
ting ut the head OF the stairs to
catch nv death rattle"
add | tell you to bring home that
razor? Didn't ! try to discourage
you from shaving?'
lie turned from me without a re-
ply. aud | went down stairs. He
came down after about half a hour.
He had been Obliged to sacrifice a
third Of his moustache TO get it IN
proper shape again, and the lather
which had gotten into his eyes gave
} him the appearance of having wept
: for a week.
ats too bad" | said, breaking a
long and embarrassing silence.
"Oh, il is, is itY" he sneered in re-
ply. "Too bad that | am not lying
q headlsss corpse up stairs and you
. figuring on my life insurance."
"Well, its no use to talk TO you,
Mr.. Bowser."
Not q bit, Mrs. Bowser You
bad a plan; | checkmated il. You
| stand revealed in your true light a
!. q would-be Borgia or worse. This
a il the last straw, Mrs. Bowser--tht
1 very last. Ia the morning we will
talk business"
e But when morninglcamehe didn'I
4 have word to say. | found hi
shaving outfit in the side yard
J, where he had thrown II from tn,