Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-05
GOOD MANNERS,

NS- -
GOOD MANNERS.
Patent Leather shOes-Eriquette Of We'd
dinEs-An Usher's Duries-FIowers for
Brides-Whnt the Groom Should Wear
How to Rat Cheese.
WRITTEN FOR THE DIsPATcH.l
The author of ''Don't" this week answers
a number Of questions on many interesting
points Of etiquette, and has little discussion
with an army officer on the matter of titles.
Two gentlemen differ as to the propriety of
wearing patent leather shoes during the day
time Please state if it is good form TO do so.
CIVIL
Formerly patentleather shoes were consid.
cred questionable taste at any time. Gentle
men of nice instincts dislike all excessively
polished surfaces, such as glossy cloth. over
pressed hats or highly glazed linen. But re-
Gently patent leather has become much used
for evening wear. A little book entitled
Hints About Mems Dress" by New York
club man, recently published, approves Of
patentleather shoes for evening dress. Per-
hsps the tact that Lord Coleridge in his recent
visit TO this country always wore patent leather
on dress occasions may have had something to
do with the fashionable revival of this mate
rial But to our mind nothing is so suitable for
evening dress as shoes of fine calf skin or mo-
rocco. The latter is especially quiet and ele-
CANT For the promenade nothing is in such
good taste as boots of fine calf skin. But in
the country patent leather is convenient. Dust
dew or the friction of the grass either Of which
soon renders calf skin unpresentable, has no
hurtful effect on patent leather; dust is easily
brushed of, moisture does not affect the polish,
and the friction of the grass in q ramble
through q meadow really improves the appear
ance of the leather. With patent leather in
the country one never needs the bootblack, and
this adds much to ones comfort on a rural
visit.
Is it proper for a lady TO bow or speak
first to a gentleman Of her acquaintance In
passing on the street, or should he2
ONE OF YOUR READERS.
The lady should always speak hrst, as we
have repeatedly said. It is the lady's province
to recognize An acquaintance or not as she may
prefer.
SIMPLY THANK HR,
!. II young gentleman should escort a lady
home from an evening entertainment, should
the lady thank him? if 80, in what manner?
z. How should lady congratulate her sister
and brother-in-law upon their marriage?
A. E.G.
l. vi COule6 idug buduk ull1s AZ
would be exceedingly ill-bred not to do So 1t
is underbred to accept any service or any kind
ness without acknowledging it by thshks. 2 If
q lady does not know how to congratulate her
sister or any member of ber~family upon her
marriage. we doubt if any instructions would
aid her. Put your ann around your SISTERS
neck, kiss her and wish her much happiness.
Shake hands with your brother-in-law and wish
him much happiness.
L In case of a church wedding, where there is
. maid OF honor. bridemaids, and groomsmen,
how does the bridal party go from the house
and how advance to the altar q When it 10
desired TO exclude all but invited guests from
the church, is it the custom to issue cards TO
be presented at the door, and if so, how should
they read. Or il not, what course is adopted2
g. Should more than one invitation be sent to q
family where there are sons and daughters in
society? 4 Which is the better form of ad-
dress, Mr.. John Smith and wife or Mr.. and Mrs.
John Smith?
i. The bridal party should leave the house in
the following order: In the first carriage the
BRIDE and her father; in carriages that follow,
the bridemaids. Members of the family usually
precede the bridal party to the church. At the
church the ushers head the bridal party to the
altar; the bridemaids usually come next, and
then the maids of honor, but commonly there
are not both bridemaids and maids of
honor. Then comes the bride upon the
arm Of her father or elder relative. The natural
place of the maid or maids Of honor if there are
also bridemaids would be after the bride. but
individual taste and preferences govern these
details, very few marriages being in all particu-
lars alike. The groom and best man enter
from the vestry and stand at the altar, the
groom in readiness TO receive the bride from
her fathers hand. The bridemaids take their
place at the side Of the bride. and the maids of
honor behind her. After the ceremony, the
bride and groom lead the procession out. q
II 1t is desired to exclude all but invited guests
cards OF admission must be issued. Print on
the card the name of the church and date and
hour of the ceremony q For each married
couple in family one invitation may be sent.
Each single adult member of the family should |
receive an invitation. 4 'tMr. and Mrs John
Smith," Always ''MI. John Smith and wife" |
never.
POINTS FOR BENEDIoTs
VIII you kindly favor me with the beneft of |
your advice on the following: / ] am about to
be married and shall send announcements out |
20 my friends whom hope will call upon me. |
but being engaged in q business which makes /
my evenings at home very uncertain my wife, /
who ls perfect stranger, Will have TO enter. /
tain. How ought the announcements to be /
it be TAT home" or ''resi- |
dence" 2 Knowing more than one person in |
q family should send an announcements to /
and in case of ladies whose mothers ! am not |
acquainted with, to whom should I send? 8 |
How soon after receiving these calls should |
We return themi 4 If person on whom you /
every Tom, Dick ana Harry was invited and /
failed to invite you, would you assume that he /
desired to cease the acquaintance s. I was |
few evenings ago after a public /
dinner because / used my fingers in eating Sar- /
atogo chips, which appeared TO me to be the /
only natural mode of eating them, was 1 /
announcements, what Is done in the case Of
business relations? an not acquainted with |
the wives Of many Of my associates. Should I |
address to the gentleman onlyi
L The circumstances you mention should not |
liter the form of the invitation. You issue
your cards ''At Home" giving place and time,
and this is all 2 To each adult person (count-
Ing married couples as one), it would be proper
and graceful to include the mothers of the /
ladies' under such circumstances. g. About two /
weeks. 4. It would bear that Interpretation,
unless the omission was by accident 8 Sara
ioga chips can be eaten with the fingers in the /
same way that biscuit or cakes are eaten. In
TACT there is no other way. 6. In sending invi-
ta1ions always include the wives of married 4
men, whether you know them or not
SOMETHING ABOUT WEDDINGS.
=. At an evening marriage at the church, il
icmary for the bride to walk in with the groom
oE groomsman? 2 There are two bridesmaids
and two groomsmen. Is it customary for the
adies to stand on one side and the gentlemen
on the other, or should the couples not be sep
arsted7 3. What are the most fashionable
lowers for the bride and bridesmaids? 4 Is it
for the groom and ushers to wear
gloves? s. What kind of neckties should the
groom and ushers wearf 6. Should the groom
md ushers wear plain or pique shirt bosom?
: Which cake is preferred for the bridecake,
white or pound? In A QUANDARY.
The bride should not, according TO present
Iocial customs, walk with the groom to the
lltsr. If she is not to be given away, she must
walk alone. Sometimes the bride is escorted to
he altar by her mother; this, of course, when