Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1889-10-05
HELPED THE AUTHOR OUT.
How a Printer Inserted a Good Idea of
His Own and Lost His Job.
From the Chicago Times.
A printer told the story,

printer told the story.
Il had a good job,'' he said, Gin Monroe
street fiction foundry-one of those print shops
where they publish stories of the Skeleton
Hunters Last Gurgling Gasp order by the
cord. 1t is the rankest kind of rot and is liable
to give printer blood poisoning if he handles
much of it. 1t is the sort of literature that in
duces little boys to get up in the night steal
the old mans pocket book. buy guns, and start
out west to rescue the imperiled maiden from
the lair OF the robber chieftain and restore her
to her agonized parents.
There were twenty printers and six liars
each full-fedged Ananias, working in the
place. The liars sat at a table in one end of
the room grinding out those unwhoesome
stories as fast as We could put them in type
One day got wsd of copy that was positively
sickening. 1t was about a lovely girl who had
been captured and torn from her home by
heartless white desperate and his baud of
bloodthrsty Apaches. The girl was in des-
perate Tx. She either had to marry the villain
or become his wife, he didn't care which. and
he was then on his way to a cave in the mount
aims, where he was going to have the ceremony
performed.
That night they camped in a rocky gorge
200 miles from nowhere and bound the unfor-
tunate maiden to tree with the usual buck
skin thongs, which cut deep into her tender
sleep. In the meantime Old Zeke, the Hairy
Scout. who was on the trail, sneaked up Just at
daylight, when people sleep the soundest
Zeke sailed in and killed twenty-five or thirty
Indians with the butt-end of his trusty rifle
He didn't want to shoot for fear he would
waken the others. Then. after he had cut
notch for each corpse on his gunstock and
hung the coarse. black scalp-locks to his belt,
he released the girl hoisted her under his arm
jumped into the saddle and rode away
He do OF nll for to- ,vbx IL.
without stopping. When night closed in the
bold scout pulled rein and went into camp.
First he picketed his horse, then built a fire,
liked cot of leaves for the girl and got her
something to eat out of his saddle bags This
was where | got in my work.
The first thing Zeke took out of the bags was
several thick slices Of fresh Vienna bread
with honey on them. Next came cold boiled
ham, cut thin. an apple pie with a short. crispy
upper crust. and last tender spring chicken
toasted a delicate brown. Mind YOU, he had
all this stuff in a pair of saddle bags in the
wilds OF the Rocky mountains, 300 miles from
civilization. III the year 1885, 1t made me sick
but resolved that the poor girl should have
one good feed if died for it. So / showed in
another paragraph like this, completing the bill
of fare:
AFTER getting the girl started Zeke reached
into the saddle bag AMI pulled out bowl OF
steamlng hot consOInme and broiled fresh
mackerel, some devIlei crabs. cold slaw, po-
tato salad. a half fry, veal outlets Dreaded,
with tomato sauce. green corn on the cob.
some clam chowder. stewed turkey, a portion
OF rice pudding. two cups of chocolate, pork
tenderloin. Rochefort cheese and a bottle of
Bass ale, Saratoga chips, plate of vanilla ice
cream, Chinese paper napkin. sliced cucum-
6ers. some California grapes and q nickel
plated nut cracker"
Ibid it go?" asked an interested listener
mo, it didn't" said the printer sadly, 'but
/ did. The boss came to me n ,xt morning with
proof slip and wanted to know who was writ
ing that story. 1 said the author was making
blind stagger in that direction, but wasn't
giving the girl a fair show.
That may be- said the boss, but if he
wants to run a cafe in connection with the
story wen hire a cook and make it easier for
you
Then he told me that was too smart to be
printer and had better go out where the cool
air would strike me. went"