Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-06-23
SOMETHING ABOUT BEAUX.


Ny mother used to talk about my beaux,
and perhaps for her sake 1 am fond of the
quaint, old-fashioned word. But let me
say in the beginning that it has distinct
meaning of its own, and should not be mis-
applied.
Hood says:
~ remember remember,
When my little lovers came,
With posy, or cherry,
Or some new invented game"
Well he does not mean lovers at all, he
means beaux.
One may have q beau, alover an admirer,
an adorer, or a comrade, but seldom may
combine any two of these in one individual,
and never all five in any one epoch of her
life, for the beau is a special attribute of
girlhood, and seldom develops the exacting
tenderness of the lover, the blind delusions of
the admirer, the infatuation of the adorer, or
the honest sympathy and helpfulness of the
comrade, who, however, does often develop
camaraderie into friendship, perhaps after all
the most satisfying relationship between man
and woman.
But the beaul The beauI What is he? Who
is he? What is his origin, habitat, sphere of
action?
Let us describe him first by negatives He
need not be young-in fact, IAN old beau is a
welt-known character in fiction drama and real
life.
He need not be handsome, although he inva-
He need not be intellectual or Iearned-in
fact, 1 never knew a beau who was either,
although l have known some men of whom
other men said, He isn't half such fool as he
looks.n
He need not be brave, for nobody expects
courage or leadership from him: nor need he be
business man, for he is usually found spend
ing the money his father or somebody else has
accumulated for him. In fact the beau, re-
duced to poverty and real work, is the most
forlorn of all objects reminding one of a per-
forming canary bird, or industrious flea. or
poor little trained poodle or any other help
less and harmless little animal coerced into un-
natural labor and foreign pursuits.
A VALUABLE ADJUNCT.
Not that 1 mean to speak severely of the
beau, for don't; in fact, like him and value
him, and should be really sorry to miss him out
of the world, but he has his limitations poor
dear like the rest of us, and one hates to see
him pushed up to the wall that defines those
limits.
Moreover, there is a positive as well as a
negative formula in the recipe for a beau He
must be good natured, and always ready, if not
with a smile, at least with simper; he must
be quick at repartee, even though a mild one;
he must have a good memory and a certain
adhesiveness of touch which will enable him
to pick up the floating gossamer threads of
society talk, and carry them to just the right
quarter for repetition He must never forget
anybody's connections. relationships, friend
ships, and enmities, and never by any chance
step upon anybody's toes, or anybody's remotest
frills. He must discover and keep the mar
row path between harmless gossip and perilous
scandal, and while always having something
interesting to say, never say anything that
could be repeated to his own or anybody else's
detrimenJ He must be sentimental to the ex-
tent of remembering the favorite flowers, colors
and perfumes of the lady to whom he is for the
moment attentive, and making graceful little
offerings in harmony with those tastes. He
must have sufficient tact to be placed where he
is wanted and to skiltully efface himself in the
presence of lover or a favored admirer or
adorer; for one of the peeuliarities of the beau
is, that he has his season, like the mushroom,
and is not at all acceptable out of it.
But even as one will sometimes capriciously
prefer salted dried or picked mushrooms to
fresh and tender vegetables, there will be in
tervals in life, perhaps to its very end, when
one turns from a grand passion. from the
pedestal Thereon ones adorers places one,
even from the solid satisfaction of a comrades
honest sympathy, and finds whimsical pleas
ure IN the conversation, the compliments, the
chit-chat of beau, and finds the same rest and
refreshment in his society as in that of the last
fashionable novel, or the lightest of society
comedies
ABUTTERFLY CoMRADESHIP.
We have spoken of the beau as an adjunct
of early girlhood, because it is only an in
genue who can be long content in the society
of beau, or who expects anything serious OF
him, or dignifes him into an ideal. Young
girls never classify the men who surround them
on their entrance into society; they are all
heroes ofromance, they all are possible lovers
and husbands and the beau, being the most
obvious, and the most demonstrative figure in
this new world, is often pitched upon by the
debutante as her ideal. and she is sometimes a
good deal disappointed in finding how wofully
TOO small he is for the giants robe" she fain
would fit upon his shoulders
Occasionally the girl is herself female beau;
not belle, for that is quite another thing but
a triher, a butterfly, an ephemeron-a person
ality answering precisely to that of the beau. In
such a case the two become not friends, for
TO be a friend requires characteristics neither
OF them possess, but familiar acquaintance,
even comrades in q certain sense, and spend
one sees a couple of butterflies lowering and
dancing over q sunny pool or bed of mignon-
ette, happy while the fine weather lasts, beaten
down and lost in the first wind of adversty.
] do not think the beau often marries; it
seems to me in glaucIng through my acQuaint-
ance on both sides of the water that he is gen.
orally bachelor. or if not poses as one. In eff
feet beau is generally mildly but intensely
selfish under his smiling and courteous surface;
he wants his money tor his own pleasures, and
he has fastidious horror of all the annoyances
and dlsill usionments of marriage; add to this
that he is neither the creature of impulse nor
of passion, nor at all capable of self-forgetful
love, and the question at once arises, why in
the world should he marry? And the answer
is: He does not-that is, not often.
But, although only the young girl believes in
her beau, as anything more than beau, he is
both valued and cherished by older women to
whom, as have implied he serves as recrea-
ton, an anodyne, a refuge from those relations
of life whose depth and intensity make them
as often the misfortune the blessing of our
lives. am, in fact very fond of my beaux.
and don't hesitate to acknowledge it; but not
for the world would let them know that
consider them as beaux pur ct simple, since
probably not one of them but would be Of
tended, for the world has grown SO false in our
day that no man is contented to ''see himself
as ithers see" him, but poses as something else.
II was not so in the days of our grand
nell, and host of their imitators were not
only content but proud, to fill the role of a
beau, and were only distressed lest they should
be taken for something else.
A REVIVAL OF GALLANTRY.
Wouldn't 1t be possible TO revive this guild
spirit. and start new school of professional
beaux-men who, finding themselves adapted by
nature and inclination for the profession,
should educate themselves for it, study up the
old masters of the ART. and embroider upon their
methods all the added fnesse and enterprise
demanded by the advance of the age? 1t is
really a subject worth considering, and
recommend IL to the notice OF my young male
friends, several Of whom show very pretty
talent in that direction.
But, pending this new departure in the his
tory Of beaux, let me impiore all my female
friends to be more precise in their classi-
Rcaticn of their male acquaintance, for