The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1889-09-04


I percussed as equally as pos
the two sides Of the thorax.
are on the left side" He was
right! In a moment however
surprise was changed to admir-
Of the fashionable PHYSICIANS
audacity. His professionalism
yet hope l may more truthfully
it unprofessional-trick was OBJ
enough. but performed with such
feet aplomb that l was duped ev0n
whilst taking part in it. He haG
turned his back to the patient, to Ms.
Midas Contango and myself, but no
was looking into large mirror above
the console which faced him!
What could 1 dop ! was mute. The
tables had indeed been so completely
turned upon me that had nothing to
say.
Madam, I must not alarm you,"
observed the triumphant specialist to
Mrs. Contango, who was in blissful
ignorance OF the deception; ''these del
icate gradations in tone can only be
at once detected after immense prac-
tice. only by those who examine a
stream Of patients; but there is some
thing on the left side Of your daugh-
ter's chest-nothing serious-so little.
indeed, that my young friend here has
been unable to find it; but there it is.
And now, the examination being COM
plete, permit us to consult as to the
treatment, and then I must 60, or /
shall incur the displeasure Of noble
but somewhat impatient patient of
mine"
When we were alone l again ex-
pressed my incredulity, delicately
limiting at my observation of his ruse
"Tut, tut! my dear young friend"
said he. testify, "you have not vt
grasped the situation. Now, here you
have a girl who coughs and has been
hoarse for q long time-then how the
deuce can you get over the fact by
telling the parents that there is no
cause for it! Very likely there is
nothing the matter with her; but why
does she coughP"
THAT was exactly what her mother
said to me-"
"There you are; and mamma was
quite right; there must be some cause
for it. We may not be able to lay our
finger upon 1t, for we must examine
and understand our patients thor
oughly very often before we can make
out their ailments, and then one finds
the mischief, because, you see. we are
expected to discover it"
"But suppose there really 10 moth
ing" A a
"Nonsense! There always is. But
even il there were not, we are equally
bound to find it; for If you tell these
anxious people, i can discover moth
ing wrong they will naturally put il
down to your ignorance, and send for
somebody else who has knowledge
enough Of human nature or sufficient
savoir fairc not to be embarrassed
with so email difficulty. Now, do
| you see my meaningP"
Theoretically there is nothing,
practically there Is" "a
"You may put 1t SO. If SO it please
you. But l assured you that there is
and there is your vigilance and
punctllious exactitude notwithstand-
ing-a little convenient difference in
resonance. The mamma heard the
remark, as intended her to do; she
had not the remotest idea what it
meant-why should she havep-but
she is perfectly happy now that the
cause Of her darling's cough has been
discovered, because she thinks, the
cause being known. the cure will fol-
low. The more unintelligible the ex-
PLANTATION. the more convinced is she
of its correctness One may remedy,
you know, q difference in resonance
but how can you pretend to cure per-
SON whom you persistently declare to
have nothing the matter with herP'
Ibegan to understand.
.Now," continued this consummate
reader Of society's intelligence, II adj
NIT that this is not SCIENCE
'.Nor what the schools and our
academical training teach U.S." haz-
arded /. at
'Quite so, my dear fellow; but &C
cept for once the tuition of man who
has not altogether failed in his pro-
fession. What I have taken the
trouble to demonstrate to you gratis is
q good working rule-smelling a
little, perhaps, so to speak, Of the
shop or OF legal tape-but il our
patrons are satisfied, our patients
made happy. our regulations ad-
vanced. can we wisely permit so triv-
ial matter as departure from slavish
adherence to what is miscalled prin-
ciple to stand between us and successp"
"Well." admitted l. q little sadly.
perhaps you are right"
| ''Of course I am, my dear young
friend. am cynic, but l succeed.
have been, for instance, beseeched
70 meet you here to-day. And now for
treatment"
A little delicate counter-irritation
was suggested and agreed on; then
the fashionable physician stepped into
his elegant turnout before the door Of
Mount Aureo, amid the profuse thanks