St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-18


"Mr. Potter. am in favor of the park,
but am rather particular now what L
sign"
He declined to put his ]. T. Blaisdell
on the paper.
William Henry Eustis claims to. have
sinch on the sonatorship from the new
district of which the Fourth ward will
be the principal constituent, but Free
man Lane thinks he will have some
thing to say on that question himself.
i
City Clerk Haney has reduced the
calling of the roll of the council to an
art. On the passage of sidewalk and
other formal resolutions he wastes no
precious time giving the aldermen
chance to vote. He usually starts olt
fair with Adams, Barrows, Bradish, and
then gradually increases his speed, and
the balance of the roll call goes some
thing like this:
Brazie, Brueshorell- Gown, Par Smith
Vandewarren, Boom, Berrarum, Presden-32
yeas, nays nothing.
The voice he has developed and cul-
tivated is unlike anything ever heard in
the council chamber before. 1t is
cross between a buZZ-Saw and the open
ing of an oyster can. 1t penetrates the
walls, fits across the avenue and par
alyZes the second trombone in the Pence
Opera house band. The Salvation Army
takes a recess when he begins to read,
and the exposition puts up its shutters
to save window glass. Street car horses
coming down central avenue hill rear
up high in the air, and the birds in the
trees scurry for shelter from the ap-
preaching cyclone. The telephone wires
cross and the central complains of
mixture of languages on the line. 1t is
a voice that sheds luster upon ian Or
dinance entitled an ordinance" and
makes "a careful and thorough inveStl-
CATION" sound like something that ought
to be remembered. 1t is voice that
does not stop to turn corner, but ploWs
ahead through every obstacle. 1t is a
Spokane voice with record to beat.
j.
The alleged system Of street lighting
in Minneapolis is modelled upon a
schedule adopted in certain sleepy vii
lagos of America, prominent among
which are Charlton. To-, and Philadel-
phia, Pa. 1t is called the Philadelphia
schedule, because it first occurred to
somnambulist in Philadelphia TO save
the city couple of dollars year by
cutting off the streetlights on the nights
when the moon is supposed to shine.
1t was adopted in Minneapolis, and its
effect is that when the moon shines
over Philadelphia there shall be no
street lights in Minneapolis. 1t made
no difference to the great mind that con-
ceived the idea of adopting this Scned-
ule that the atmospheric conditions are
not always the same in Philadelphia
and Minneapolis. When the morn re-
fleets its etfulgent beams over John
Wanamaker's store in Philadelphia a
thick bank of clouds often neStleS over
his branch pants emporium i'll this city.
All the same, the citizens of this city
must grope in darkness and be Slugged
in secret, and paralyzed with helpless
unanimity because OF this famous Phil
adelphia schedule. 1t is worse than
Indiara politics in Minnesota.
i
He's going home at O'Clock,
And rather dizzy gated.
But fearing no domestic shock,
No spouse for him has waited.
He falters not but lifts the latch
And walks him boldly in;
No one is there his beard to snatch,
Or give him needless chin.
His boots he wears right up the stairs
And noise galore he makes;
The naughty man for nothing cares,
His wife is at the lakes.
i
First Chappie-Aw, deah, boy, what
d'y think of this new opera co, y know?
Second Chappie-They're clevah,
doosed clevah.
Yeas they sing might well, y'know,
but then"
But what. chappie9"
"The chorus"
Yeas? whats the matter?"
Jaw. its awfully bad fawm, don't
cherknow, to be shaped that way. Two
clawet lemonades bartender, please"
The following is an acrostic sent in by
a confident crank, who says the prophecy
contained therein is sure to come true,
if the home team plays ball:
Morrison
HaNrahan
CrosSley
McVEv
Mitchell
Foster
HeNgle
Duke
Pat Dugdale
Miller
JAntzen
DrisChel
MinnEhan.
The second shows where they will
end the season if they fatten up the
error column as they have of late:
Morrison
HaNrahan
JanTZen
MinneHhau
DugdalE
Mitchell
Foster
HeNgle
DriSchel
CrOssley
McVey
Miller
DUKE
i
Robert Roland Odell,sdwho has re-
turned from an Eastern trip, says: 81
know three things-FlrSt, That Chicago
will get the Worlds fair in 1892; second,
The Brown-Sequard elixir is dangerous
stuff to fool with; third, The positions
of deputy custodian and janitor of the
postoffice have been rolled INTO one
office, to be called the superintend-
ency. The busiest place l saw when
rY,oc nUuov VOC tha onar+orc nf tho