Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-04-21

in embarrassing positions in which they oc-
casionally find themselves placed while
mingling in the gay and giddy whirl of
society.
L VIII you kindly tell me IL white shoes
should be worn with light dress at an evening
party? 2 What gloves should be worn with a
black costume2
l. White shoes are not now worn at all. The
most fashionable shoes for evening wear are
ries or CATERS Of onze leather. 2 Tan colored
gloves are generally worn with black cos
tune.
WEDDING RECEPTIONS.
I attended wedding reception. and upon en-
tering was presented to the bride for the first
time. After the most formal greetings passed
on through the room to an adjoining apart
ment; as there were many guests and the hos
tess much occupied, there seemed no opportu-
nifty to again speak with her. Should have
made an attempt to have done So and was it
right to 60 OF without taking leave, or should
she have made an effort to come to me?
LILLE.
You should have found opportu nifty to take
leave of your hostess. 1t is not incumbent
upon the bride to seek out her guests; she
should remain in one place.
Is it proper for the gentleman or the lady to
use the fan at the opera? READER.
The fan is for the lady. A gentleman might
relieve lady of her fan for a few moments,
especially if she is fatigued, but the fan in the
lsdy's hand, if rightly handled, is graceful, ele-
CANT, and forms part of her costume.
R.s.v.P.
Should R. S. V. P be inserted on notes of in
vitation?
1t is now thought to be in better taste to omit
this request for the reason that it may be sup
posed equivalent to hint that the recipient
does not know what is proper to be done. All
invitations should be responded to, and hence
R S. V. P. is considered unnecessary.
ANNOUNCING AN ENGAGEMENT.
/ How should a young lady announce to her
friends that she is to be married, when the
marriage will be witnessed by none but the
family? IS there no way but to call and an
nounce the fact? 2 Is the linen of a trousseau
expected to 60 to a laundress before it is worn?
Is it not much better to have it pressed so that
the lace will not have to be starched and spoil
its beauty? IGNoRAMUs.
1. There is no regular form of announcing an
engagement of marriage. Sometimes it is in
trusted to friend, who takes occasion to make
It known, or dinner party may be given, either
by the family of the bride-elect or that of the
groom, the friends of each being present, and
the host at the close of the entertainment an
nounoes the fact. 2 The linen of trousseau
hould generally be laundried, but where there
much ace it may be pressed if the owner
prefers.
Please tel me If it is proper for a lady. in
speaking OF her husband to use his title. The
President, the Judge or the General, or simply
speak of him as Mr.. Jones or Smith?
It is customary for wives to refer to their
husbands by their titles, but is in better taste
30 add the name. Instead of THE Colonel said
30 and So" say Colonel Smith said. ETC."
THE USE OF SEALING WAX.
!. Please inform me if it Is still in good form
20 use sealing wax in social correspondence. 2
Would like instruction with reference to sta
donery to be used
l. 1t may not be fashionable to use wax for
sealing letters, but under no circumstance
could it be bad form. Wax gives letter an
elegance and distinction that makes it always
appropriate. What can be more ineleeant
than the custom of sealing letters by mucilage
moistened with the lips? A Frenchman once
challenged an Englishman for sending him
letter sealed with wafer on the ground that
no gentleman should send another his saliva
2. Note paper should be unruled. white with
out ornamentation and with envelopes to
match. Note paper folded once and inserted
IN a square envelope is considered the most
elegant
l. At luncheon where bouillon is served,
should you drink it out of the cup OF sip it with
spoon? 2 IN sending present to young
LADY who Is to be married the same day the
present is sent, which would be preferable on
q card, with best wishes" or With cong-atu-
]. Should be drank out of the cups. 2
with best wishes only, and not with con-
gratulations. Congratulations can only be
properly addressed to the groom.
When persons who have been in mourning
desire to re-enter society what course should
they pursue. LOUIS D.
They must leave cards at their friends and ac-
quaintances, as an intimation that they will
now receive visitors and make calls. In cases
rrh aardc of
during their seclusion, cards should be sent
with the words Thanks for kind inquiries"
ESQ. OR Mr.. ON LETTERS.
!. Which is the proper way to address a let
ter to gentleman? ''Air. Y. q. Jacks" or Y.
2. Jacks, ESQ" 2 Should note to a person
living in the same town as writer be sent by
mail or messenger? Could it properly be left
by the writer? 3. When note is left by writer.
or sent by messenger, should one write on it
one of the following phrases: Addressed
Present, In Haste, En- Vile. En- Campagne?
4 If friend take it what is the proper
phrase? kindness of Bearer" Courtesy of
Friend" or must you name the friend? g. In
their own family should father and mother
precede their children to table. and if a dinner,
lunch. supper, ETC., is given. should the host
and hostess advance in the dining room first,
vice versa, the hostess first and the host last?
State clearly which is correct. If the head of
the house is a widow, what should be her posi-
tion, and if she has brother living with her or
grown up son, also state particulars?
DANTE.
]. In this country usage is not uniform In
England ESQ" must always be added to the
name Of the person addressed, if be is gentle
man. This rule is adopted by many persons
here, but others disregard it. Punctilious peo-
pie generally act upon it, and tradesmen also
recognize it in addressing their customers, as
patron might deem it impertinent to be ad-
dressed otherwise. 2 A letter for a person
living in the same town can be sent by mail OF
messenger or delivered in person. g. Of what
advantage are any Of these phrasesf Use
neither. 4 Upon the envelope Of a letter sent
by a friend write "Politeness of Mr.
whatever the name may be. 5. In the family it
is natural for the elder members to take pre-
cedence of the younger. At a dinner party the
host offers his left arm to the Oldest or most
distinguished lady present, other guests then
follow. the hostess coming last upon the arm of
the gentleman she has asked to take her in.
But if the dinner is given in honor of some
gentleman it is proper for the hostess
TO go first upon the arm of this
gentleman, the host coming last. If the head
Of the house is widow then, of course
she is the head of the house, and her position
is not different from that of a married woman.
1t may be, however. the house is not hers. but
the inheritance Of her son, and in this case her
position is solely by the consent Of the rightful