The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1889-09-26

which greeted me was IN itself q test
Of my love for Alice. Cats, rats, birds,
rabbits aud guinea pigs were in prolu-
sion. and liberal allowance of chain
permitted fox terrier of the most &C
tive disposition to snap at my legs.
causing me to jump aside on 3 pen OF
Cochin Chinas, which upset. and my
own equanimity also. just when most
required it for q diplomatic triumph.
The proprietor, very grimy and mo-
rose man, in a slouched hat and dirty
shirtsleeves, and putting, l think, the
very rankest shag ever smelt. stood
behind his counter cycling me silently.
When had replaced the Cochin Chi
mas in their position, which didn't i'm
prove my gloves, l broached my errand
and said had heard of parrot which
was rather accomplished. negligently
limiting l had had many experiences oil
similarly talented birds, and might, at
a fair price, buy it; to all of which the
proprietor made no reply. but smoked
contemplatively and looked at me
somewhat sardonically. At last he
condescended to reply, at the same
time refilling his pipe:
III ever yer saw par rot, mister, ia
ekal mine, I'm a Dutchman."
This was point I had not come to
discuss. But it was necessary to pro-
pitiate him, so l observed had heard
the bird was fine talker.
''Torker!" answered the proprietor,
scornfully. ''why. she'd tork any bloom.
in Washers head off," with a personal
application which was marked, land
French as we'll as English. answer
questions, tell the time; in fact. the
ole bag O. tricks. Tork, indeed!''
"And what is the price of the birdp''
said /, coming to the point.
1.-The price of that bird is twenty
pun-and no less.'
This was rather ''facer." I was
determined. on the great principle OF
the sprat for the salmon, to pay for the
bird out of my own pocket, and mag
unanimously insist on refusing to take q
farthing, presenting it to dear Mrs.
Hillstone Gold wretch) as proof OF my
regard and esteem. But twenty pounds!
nothing, OF course, to that well-to-do
vulgarianess. if I may coin a word, but
to me, who had limited salary and
unlimited tastes, great deal. How
ever, it was quite clear the Individual
before me was not to be diplomatized
into any reduction of price. So, after
a brief inward struggle. l resolved to
pay the money and get in some way an
enormous profit for the expenditure
afterward.
''You say the bird talks French and
English?''
''Yes. Find one like 'er, mister, il
you can"
''And is in good health and plum
age?" added, congratulating myself
on my business-like aptitude.
why, yer don't think I'm such a
bloomin' fool as to keep my birds in
bad eth. do yer?' said this truculent
man, while the fox terrier growled
carniverously, "rm an honest man,
am"
/ really felt in this wild region some.
what nervous, especially as some of the
natives were looking into the shop.
So to close the interview, l said: ''Well,
III give you the price you ask"
The proprietor made no movement
and looked at me silently, then quietly
remarked, Il know yer WON'T
1 felt annoyed. but he was too for.
midable for me to show my annoyance.
Did he doubt my ability to produce the
cash? Calming myself I repeated, III
pay twenty pounds to you for that
Bird
Il know yer WON'T" repeated the
proprietor, and some of his friends
laughed approximately.
And why not, them" said
haughtily at which they laughed
again, and most Extensively.
''Cos that there birds Sold"
"Sold?" I repeated, while the audi
ence laughed more than ever, and one
the wit. suppose, with brutal famili
arity, said: "And so are you''
"Why didn't you say SOP" 1 replied
to which the proprietor answered, he
s'posed COS I didn't ask him, which
caused another ebullition of merriment
To be the cause of wit in others is I'M
pleasant anywhere, in my opinion, bu
in the case of a Bethnal Green group
particularly annoying. 0 that ridicu
lous enthusiasm of mine!
However, was really in doubt VIVA
to do, for, having said I'd buy the ole
woman parrot, I didn't choose afte1
a flourish on my own trumpet-th'
only performance, by the way, Badger
says in which shine-but let that pas
TO 20 back and confess my diplomac,
at a discount.
THAT there birds sold to party il
Russell square," the proprietor con
tinued, but needed him not, though
did afterward. What was the bes
thing to do? "Buy bird of some sor
and pass it off as the Simon pure,
said expediency. At what a tangle.
web we weave when. etc. Had I neve
listened to expediency's voice-bu
you can find out the moral of this stor
for yourself.
Il want to buy parrot" said I, so
some sort-a good talker. and hand
some bird, and as like the one you "
sold as you've got"
"'Ere's the IDENTICAL" said the bir'
seller, producing cage containing
good looking bird enough, which h
informed me would talk very fairly
would not swear, and was as handsom
as the Russell square one. The pric
was two pounds, and another for tn
cage. so pat down my three sover
eigns, got with some difficulty "a small
mob of children following under tn
idea the parrot was going to ''perform'
q cab. and went back to the Hillstone