The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1889-03-15


think so?-don't you know it is SO?
The audience of one became exceed.
ingly uneasy.
but. doctor, you are too deep for
me-" he said.
THE mastery of the mind. the reduc-
ton of the soul to a tangible, apprecia-
BILE condition, is the aim of modern
philosophy" continued the lecturer.
ITO me it has lost its complexity. and
my theory of immortality is based on
truth as solid and old as Mount Olym.
pus." Then, sinking his voice to a
harsh whisper, he continued: II have
mastered the problem of SO disengaging
the soul from its mortal case that it re.
mains knowing, thinking, seeing,
omnipotent creation. which exists un-
changed at will in whatever portion OF
the universe, celestial and terrestrial
THAT is a valuable discovery" re-
marked the now frightened commercial
man; ''why don't you put it into prac-
tice?"
Because" said the philosopher, in
an ominously hoarse voice; "because !
must demonstrate the truth by expert
ment. / must have a subject!'
"a subject"
Il must have subject who, like you,
is a believer in the philosophy, and is
willing to go through the form Of dying
in order to become immortal! For sci
ence-philosophy-immortality-"
Lemuels saw the black eyes flash like
fire, felt the mans sinewy fingers close
with a claw-like grip on his neck before
he could utter a cry, and then the car
and people seemed to whirl about him
with a terrific roar. Then before him
passed the vision of his weeping widow,
his orphaned children; he saw his own
funeral, he heard the Grafton over his
coffin, he saw his own body lowered
to the grave, heard the clods fall upon
his breast.
"His soul-his soul-it must not es-
CAPE" Kissed in his ear. Then all was
blank.
As the train was entering the city OF
its destination Lemuels first felt a re-
turn of life and opened his eyes. Above
him stood two men who had been work
ing upon him with restoratives. and
about him were faces of his fellow
passengers, some sympathetic, others
stolid.
"He's all right now," said one of the
men, a muscular keeper, "he'll get over
his choking well enough"
"Yes, but it was a pretty close call, !"
replied the other; five seconds more
and he would have been goner. You
caught the philosopher just in time"
The two men went away, leaving the
still dazed man where he sat With
returning consciousness of what had
he SAW, at the further end of
the car. his murderous assailant bound
fast. but still furious. Then appeared a
realization of the fact that he came near
being a victim to a violent maniac.
When the train stopped, Lemuels
started to go out of the car and escape
At the door he was stopped
by burly guard. who told him to go
back and sit down.
''But am near home now, and am
willing to say goodbye"
..Yes, yes; that's all right" said the
guard, "we're all near home now, and
We'll soon be all right. Go sit down
like good fellow and I'll give you an
orange after awhile"
The commercial travellers face first
blanched, then famed fiery red.
Sir! demand that you let me out
of this car at once. | am Lcmuel Z.
Lemuels, travelling for the house of
Yodde. Rode & Co, and my home is
in Toledo"
.'Yes. that's all right" said the
guard in a manner meant to be quiet
ing; "yes, we all know that, but go
back and sit by the King of Sweden
and William Shakespeare for few
longer, and we'll soon be
home"
I'VE gods!" almost shrieked the now
really alarmed commercial traveller;
..you don't think I'm crazy, do your
''Oh, no, no." replied the guard.
who held the door; ''oh, no; of course
are none Of us crazy; we are
all kings or poets or philosophers Or
drummers. But GO back and sit down
now or" noticing Lemuels' evident
desire to be violent, .'or I'll put the
jacket on you"
The astonished representative of
TOdde, Rodde & Co. sank down on the
coal-box, his knees weakening beneath
him.
Great Jehosophat! To think that l
am kept here as a crazy and will
probably have to go to the asylum"
Then brilliant thought struck him as
it should have done before. In desper-
alton he drew out gold watch. opened
it and disclosed the photograph OF a
baby.
My dear sir, let this prove to you
that am not a lunatic, and only dead
beat This baby and her mother wait
me at home. Here is my name en-
graved. and the simple fact that l have
such a watch proves that l am not a
patient. Here is my order book-see
an order took at Shandees this after
noon-see my thousand-mile railroad
my pocket-book-see all
these proofs. and then believe me that
though l am mad, am not crazy"
To be brief, the proofs were con-
vincing, and after a small financial
transaction between Lemuels and the
guard. by which the latter was five dol
,,s r;obor Tho 6rI,, oooraditad capro