Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-10-25
WOMAN AND HOME.
IMPORTANCE OF TEACHING POLITE
NESS EARLY IN LIFE.

About "stropg Minded" women-A wo-
man Who Makes Pocket Puns-The
French neutrality-suspicious. Time"
Il Is becoming a matter Of some anxiety
among thoughtful people whether politeness
is not almost a lost art. Not that there is any
les of etiquette or niannerism rather the
contrary1. but that there is less OF habit
nal politeness than there formerly was among
people OF respectable social position. And It
L a los greatly TO be deplored. There are
some misguided persons, who, confounding
hypocrisy with good manners, think 1t honest
TO be rude, but there many more who
never cast a thought upon the subject. To
them one word
Do not think that your son or daughter can
acquire habits Of politeness as they eau cloaks
at the moment they are needed The very
phrase-habits Of pOliteneSs-teaches Us the
of that. Habit implies the fac
ulty of unconscious action in any given direc-
ton. II we would have our children truly
polite, they must first see that We are 80, and
that from the first breath they draw, for
even - early do impressions begin 20 be made
upon them, aud secondly, they must be
gently checked In their first manifestations
Of selfshness, for no person can he truly po-
lite and selfish at the same time
To render thanks with gracious warmth
for every slightest favor; 10 never meet an
other, Of whatever rank, or however many
times daily, without IA smile or bow OF genial
courtesy; 70 rise spontaneously in the pres
ence of age; 10 'lend hando gracefully
wherever one is needed; TO step aside that
another may pass before; To ask no questions
concerning another's private matters; to
20 NJ 80 80,
really not know the things that we have rea-
son 20 suppose that others would not wish US
70 know. To make no comments upon such
occurrences when by circumstances we have
been obliged to see or hear them; TO avoid
disagreeably loud talking or whispering; to
allow 20 others their fun share of the CONVEX
sation, without leaving the whole burden OF
of it upon them; 10 think first of others and
only secoudarily Of ourselves. are all essential
parts of true Politeness, and they can never
be successfully assumed by those 10 whom
they are not habitual from babyhoOd
We hardly realize to what an extent our
daily actions and motions are automatic, or.
TO speak more correctly, are 50 habitual that
mental action in regard to them is uncon-
scious We rise, dress, eat, walk, talk, laugh
or cry without consciously exerting our mus
Giles 10 produce these results In the same
way we should be polite without knowing it,
without having TO cast a thought upon it.
One Of our best writers on etiquette says:
Snow il is easy enough TO learn when and
how 20 leave a card, how 70 behave at din
ner, how TO dress, how TO eat with ones fork,
how to sit in a carriage, how 90 bow, how to
curtsey. how TO receive and how TO drop an
acquaintance, but how to be polite is a far
higher education" And it is this education
which must begin in the cradle.
To a certain extent 1t may be an inherit
ance. Mr.. Forepsugh, whose long expert
ence with animal training has made HIM an
authority, says that the horses whose sires
have been trained are much more readily
taught than are others, and those who are
descended from two or more generations of
trained animals are themselves already half
trained, their intuitions are quicker and surer,
their minds more responsive.
Among human beings we recognize the fact
that there are cultured and uucultured
classes and that il is ordinarily easier for
child of cultivated parents to acquire the
habits of cultured people than for one not 30
descended. But this alone Is not enough
The colt whose sires for a dozen generations
have been taught to perform most wonderful
fests for the Snowman, cannot vet dispense
with training. He may learn TO dance the
Equine Quadrille" more easily than can the
wild horse Of the praiyie, but he will never
learn It without instruction. Neither can
child, no matter how Lon G his pedigree, afford
to dispense with the silent education which
comes from constant association with people
who are themselves always polite or with the
not less important knowledge conveyed by
precept upon precept.
The children who see-and they are won
derfully quick and sure to see-that the po-
hteness Of their parents Is but a veneeriug Of
company manners put on for show. will
be little likely To trouble themselves 70 obtain
even this infnitesinal degree Of 1t, and their
parents are almost sure to be exposed, at the
moment when they would least desire it, by
the i'll manners Of their children
The enfant terrible is in general only the
inopportuue spokesman Of his parents i'll
breeding. II the child says-I Will, won't;
you shall, you shan't; give me some Of that:
/ want some Of the other; tie up nv shoel
You're a fool. You lie! OF uses other anna
BILE expressions OF the sort, we may be quite
sure that be is in the habit OF hearing them
st home, and no amount OF shocked looks and
deprecatory expressions Of astoniShment on
the part Of his Darents will or should alter
this opinion.
Let no parent console himself for the bois-
ferrous rudeneSs Of his child by the thought
that "he will know better by and by For,
though friction with the world will undoubt-
edly in time teach an offending youngster
that people viii not always submit 20 having
their clothes used as foot mats or 10 receiv-
ing other similarly agreeable attentions, vet
the worlds friction Will never bring more
than an exterior polish. II should be our
end and aim not 20 have our children's hearts
and minds like the marble on which friction
has bestowed Ortiltant surface, for within
the marble Is rough and uncouth still Ra-
Their should we wish them TO be like precious
stones shining with an inner light which no
miShap can destroy .-Helen f. Smith in La
dies Home Journal