The Anaconda standard. [volume] (Anaconda, Mont.) 1889-1970, 1889-09-25
FUN AND

FUN AND PHILOSOPHY.
Msssa o. WIS., s.A nssAly E~xhsl.s.sa.s
Properties.
The waiter girl IL diRerens from q poet.
She II not horn; she ID maid 10 order.-
The highest grade of impudence-to
pass o~ver.-FYieyra0e Halter.
good time .ay VS. .TSers are r., no. HE. on
me;" But he forRets ''Timc hies."-FAd-
Cis a..;: ito a .sC want your advice
Lawyer-Excuse me. but u fee of I'D
will he necessary before Discussing legal
Citi.cnL.Certsinly; there yon are. My
sorry, air. but you are n little TOO late. 1
have been retained ny Sniith.-Af".1er's
Baxar.
Yabslcy-what has become of old man
FiRg? never hear OF him any more. Is
keeping boariers.-Tssye Ha"te E.rr"css.
Mndgc-Peck, do you helieve i'm sheoi
Mr.. n. Peck-No, 1 don't believe i'm it,
bat l have got To stand it.-Ie'Te Haute
E.rDress.
any friends are Responsible for my be-
"How was that" asked the syrnpathctic
visitor. II was sentenced to IN. hanged.
=. "'i ii ief im T%i ONE e%S:t"1f 70 Ss" s%s"s.
An murderer of African
blood, when about to be led tn the scat
more watermelon before he locked his
last on earth. His request was granted.
and i'm an hour he was dead. Yet people
tell las that watermelOns are not unwhOle-
some.-DetsOif Free Press.
Inca telling Of her Watching trip,-And
all Y ss : way sa nS%s we H%ss do ' ssn sh Snsw I
would have been VERY glad tn have been
Inez-Thanks, hut the shore has lots of
rocks; quite. an attraction nowadays, as
you are aware.-.Keo''sey Enterprise.
Late HOURS tell ON a man. but he d3ssn't
Miss Crimpie Ito clerk Of the Snake
tasrss s Z" %"r ro conn Mr. H.. B Ri.sssas @e Gier sne
Yes ma'am. ANYTHING wrong: Miss
wc , WOULD aifina IKE P ,ir : jn1 to " ca mns''h Il o. ana
M"asky's Weekly.
When maidens greet
ulnn the street,
At "a sight Of it,,
Now. "herr'sa pretty how.ly,lo;I
\ CHANCE ACQUAINTANCE.
Two men meet i'm n dark alley.
First STANDARDIZATION me; IL is too
dark tn see your face or distinguish your
size, but IL mistake not you are slack
second Stranger am. And, although
I rave never met you before. I ann quite
confident from what l have read that
your voice is that of Tascott of Chicago.
the police station, where we can he safe
from the officers of the law.-.J"i0e.
THE WIND TAKEN OUT OF HER SAILS.
"Mr M~cClintock,' she shouted, IL want
you to take your feet off the parlor table"
Mrs: McClintock." he said, i'm II fixed,
determined voice. 81 allow only one per-
And who is that: she ~.manded
You, my dear" he replied softly, AS he
$50, young man. said the painter. as
he daubed a streak of sky on the canvas,
''ycy want to he an artist, do you"
'Can You live on crackers and cheese
ON some days and ON nothing at other
~ don't know; I never tried"
'Can you work from q o'clock I'm the
morning till 8 o'clock at night. and never
get tired and stop to rest?
II don't know. II must say it's doubt
tistic signs for "a brewery orciearrtte firm.
with the soft end Of q brush""
swell, you think il over, and IL you
feel certain of IL, come around and l will
sec what you can do at p~ainting."-Me'-
Something wrong.-A child who had
jus. mastered her caiechism confessed
"though I obey the fifth commandments,
and honor my papa and yet my
many days are not n bit longer i'm the
land, because I am still put to bed at .
o'clock."-7imes IF Inaiio.
NO. sobbed the widow, Il shall never
find Johns equal; but p-perhaps ] c-can
find h-h-his equivalent. "-HoI1er's Boear.
City Man ION a iiInImer jauntI-Arcy you
going TO have an agricultural exhibition
here this year?
Farmer lsadly) Moo, I'm 'fraid not.
Most of the old ladies what makes quilts
is died OFT, and there amt IA decent race
hoss i'm the county.-Neo York Weekly.
"What is that?' asked the pretty WISH
tor at the camp. as the bugles sounded the
CHEEKY dinner call. THAT" said the cor
poral, smelling the battle f-on afar, sis
the horn that cheers bat not inebriatcs."-
BTookiyn Eagle.
..This il somewhat of n Irvine trnst.'"
said the young man AS his best girl wound
her arms about his neck to whisper sweet
nothings i'm his large left ar.-keo,ney
Enterprise.
No longer need We the advice
"Be thou cOntented with thy lot:
For we get everything that's nice
by dropping nickels in the slot.
philadelphia Press.
The counter sigh-.sC-a-s-h!"-Capita
IBested by . Hotel Clerk.