Beverly banner. [volume] (Beverly, N.J.) 1877-1964, 1889-09-28
VARIETIES.
Etching g a Yank-y invention.

Nature end wisdom always say the
same.
Little things that tell-Little broth.
ers and sisters.
Where did the gas man meter in
the cellar, of course.
There is little influence where there
is no great sympathy.
A reputation is a poor thug to
rely on Tor steady board.
The gr an apple makes most tell
ing fight after it is down.
The quickest way to smooth rough
characters 3 to iron them.
Graft borders upon knavery wis.,
dom neither uses nor wants it.
An eagle always feels more or less
Soarness i'll its wings when it uses them.
A hairdresser hopes to flourish in
this world and in the world that is to
comb.
How much sooner it gets too dark
to saw wood tho ii docs to play lawn
tennis.
Diamonds no longer indicate wealth,
any more than slang pass for
finement.
There are men who are really wise.
TO + wise in ones own conceit IS to
be otherwise.
When you feel like "alling big
man liar, be sure your right, then
use the telephone.
The bad small boy, when his mother
calls, is like the echo. He suswers,
but he doesn't come.
A citizen who his been run into by
safety bic ycle says it hp~ts just 90
much as the old kind
A man who can't sing and will sing
has depro sing effect on The value Of
real estate in his locality.
Every man hss his role N life, es-
pecially the MN who tries to ride q
bucking mule at circus,
The young idea may sometimes be
best taught to shoot by putting it
through course Of sprouts.
1t IS not good that repels or evil
that attrac' hut he nonotonv of
good and the variety in evil.
We should not trust too much to
ourselves, because we have ;often
neither grace nor under standing.
Many 81 object IN life must be at
tanned by flank movements it 10 the
zigzag road hat lends to the top.
The excuses of our youth are
draughts upon old age; payable with
interest about thirty years after date.
Those are the bcss husbands and
fathers who prove their devotion by
actions which continue to bless even
after death.
A man in strange village reads
sign: "Ask your druggist for it,"
reflects a moment End says with q
grin: "Ah, l see. A Prohibition
town."
He-"How beautiful and poetic are
some of the old Indian words! Mime
haha, for instance or Alabama r She,
eyes, and Kissmee.' Which he did
if he was any good.
johnny is an awful boy" said Mrs.
Brown. "He hasn't sat still moment
this whole blessed day." eff I wss
his mother" returned Mrs. Slipper,
che wouldn't sit still for whole
month"
There is burden of care in getting
riches-fear in keeping them, tempte
lions in using them, guilt in abusing
them, sorrow in losing them, and
burden of account at last to be given
up concerning them.
Drug CLERKS ought to have good
salarir-. The man who hurts h's con-
science l 900 times day by saying:
eve do not keep it, but we have
preparation put up by ourselves that
is better" should be we'll paid.
A COUNT yman had consulted a for
tune teller as to his iture. you'll
be poor, kind sir, unit you are thirty"
We the prediction of the Python g.
"And then p replied the countryman.
"Oh after that you'n get used to it."
The Good Man (sadly)-Ah, my
son, you have been 10 the circus it
pains sme greatly to think that one
so young should have crossed the thres-
hold of iniquity. The Bad Small Boy
i didn't cross no threshold; [
crawled in under the INT.
A gentleman was once lament'ug to
a fiend the conduct of his son.
"You should speak to him with
frmn' IS and remind him of his duti ,"
said the other.
He pays no attention to what
say. He listens only to the advice of
fools, Then, with sudden thought,
Il wish you would speak to him."
Poet (iuvading the sanctum) Your
compositor made an awful mistake in
my poem. I,stead of 1 kiss | her
under the rose, he at it up under
the nose.
Editor-"I don't the T;st"ke."
Poet-"You don't ?"
Editor-"No; you kiS,ed her uo-
der the nose when you F'ss her un-
der the Use, didn't you Think it
over my friend.'
One morning little Dora wss busy
at the ironing table, smoothing the
towels and stocking.
"Jsn't it hard work for the little
arms?" | asked.
A look OF sunshine came into her
face as she glanced toward her mother