davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

A BILIOUS Britisher writes in the
London Sunday Times: IF I were
asked for an epitome of American life
1 should point to Broadway tramcar.
1t dashes along, Juggernaut of ille-
gality. The road was built through
bribery and corruption. It is owned,
not by NEWCOMERS, but by Philadel-
phia shareholders. The car is over
crowded, to the inconvenience and an
noyance of every passenger On the
front platform, in open violation of the
regulations of the company, is mob
of smokers. On the back platform,
also in violation of the regulatory, is a
mob of pickpockets. The driver is dis
regarding city ordinance by the speed
at which he drives, and there is no trip
without its accidents. Corrupt, un-
comfortable, but fast that is the
Broadway tramcar; and it is, I regret
to say, in these respects, characteristic
of the great countr- which permits it
to exist"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

Mrs. W. o. LEEDS, wife of one of
the richest men in Indiana, has secured
evidence that nineteen different saloon
keepers of Michigan City have sold
liquor to her husband this year after
she had, in accordance with the law,
formally notified them not to do so.
She proposes to have the saloonkeepeSs
suffer from $40 to 800 for every drink
sold to Mr.. Leeds after notice was
given. Her investigation showed Incl
dentally that out of sixty-five places in
Michigan City where liquor is sold
only ffty-one are licensed. It is ru-
mored that Mr.. Leeds has promised to
support the saloonkeepers and supply
the sinews of war. The amount of
money he can control is estimated to
be $1,000 600.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08
Food and Drink.

A British officer who used to amuse
himself by visiting the baZars of Bonn
bay in the dress of native, once made
the acquaintance of an old Hindoo who
had travelled both in Europe and North
America
"How do you like their big cities"
asked the turbaned Englishman.
"YOu never saw such fine buildings"
said the Hindoo; "and it's pity they
should have such tenants, for those
Christians are surely not more than
half civilized"
"They kill their COWS, don't they?"
Eyes; and more than that" said the
worshiper of Brahma, their teachers
preach against the sin of wrong drink
ing, and never say a word about wrong
eating"
Those teachers might reply that al
cohol is responsible for countless crimes,
and for at least nine-tenths of our nu-
merous digestive disorders, but it is not
less certain that the remaining tenth
comprises some very troublesome and
yet very avoidable complaints.
In the countries of the Caucasian
nations nearly all persons who can
financially afford it, eat, in the course
of their lives, tons of things which
they cannot properly digest; and yet
overeating is not the chief trouble. 1t
is very much as with excessive drink
ing. If we would regulate the quail
ity, the quantity would take care of
itself. People are not apt to commit
nightly havoc for the sake of cistern
water. Nor do lager beer drinkers
swallow bottle after bottle to quench
their thirst. They do not drink beer
for the sake of its nutritive properties.
They use it for its stimulating quail
ties, and for similar purposes nine out
ten gluttons stuff themselves with
strong meats and peppered made
dishes. They gorge themselves to ex-
cite the jaded digestive organs with
tonic viands, just as the topper e1cites
the torpid energies of the system with
tonic fluids. There may be persons
who ruin themselves by an undue fond
ness for water and bread, but they are
as rare as outdoor workers injured by
an overdose of fresh air. Potatoes and
milk do not fill gluttons' graves. As .
rule, natural appetites have natural
limits, and under anything like natural
circumstances can be safely INDUCED.
Osuald.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

THERE has expired at Rye, England,
an old sailor named James Bayley, who
was known to have saved no fewer than
twenty-six lives, frequently at the i'm
minent risk of his own. On one occas-
ion he kept three men afoat in Sunder-
land harbor until they were rescued,
and he twice saved the occupants of
Deal boats which had capsized off the
South Foreland.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

An army officer, familiar with Okla
homa, is credited with the statement
that among its indigenous productions
that will furnish employment and OBJ
trusive fellowship with the settlers are
skunks and bedbugs. Of the former
he says there are countless millions,
and they will be found strong, pun
gent contestants for the country. The
Indians have been in the habit of kill
ing them and selling their pelts by the
wagon-load. The soil is full of the
bedbugs, and they are a thousand
times worse than the sand flies.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

MISS MARGARET BLAINE is fast earn
ing the reputation of being one of the
wittiest young women in Washington.
She is clever and sarcastic, but uses
her powers with rare judgment and
good-nature. Her voice is particularly
pleasing, and it is said that she has a
naive way of saying Don't you know ?"
that is the envy of all other Washing
ton bellies. She acquired it in England
during her visit last year, and uses it
frequently in her speech.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08
Wide.AWake Boys.

In this busy, hurrying age, when
competition in all lines of work is sharp
and continuous, the boy who desires to
excel must needs be wide-awake and
prompt. Not that he must necessarily
possess what the world calls "cheek, !"
nor the sharpness that approaches dis
honesty; indeed, quite to the contrary.
But he must go about the world with
his eyes open, and be ready to take
advantage of every suitable opportu-
nifty.
Thirty years ago, Mr.. H., nursery
. man in New York State, left home for
day or two. It was rainy weather
and not the season for sales, but Gus
toner arrived from distance, tied up
his horse, and found his way to the
kitchen of the farmhouse, where two
lads were cracking nuts.
"Mr. II. at home?"
"No, sir" said the eldest, Joe, ham
mering at nut.
"When will he be back?"
"Dunno, sir. Mebbe not for week.
The other boy, Jem, jumped up and
followed the man out. "The men are
not here, but I can show you the
stock" he said, with such a bright,
courteous manner, that the stranger,
who was little irritated, stopped and
followed him through the nursery,
examined the trees, and left his order.
"You have sold the largest bill that
have had for this season, Jem," his
father, greatly pleased, said to him on
his return.
I'm sure" said Joe, sullenly, I'm as
willing to help as Jem, if I'd thought
in time"
A few years afterward, these two
boys were left by their fathers failure
and death with but two or three hun
dred dollars each. Joe with them
bought an acre or two near home. The
land was poor, the crops scanty, the
market low. He has worked hard and
faithfully, but he is still poor, dis
contented man. Jem bought an emf
grants ticket to Colorado, hired as
cattle-driver for a couple of years, with
his wages bought land at forty cents an
acre, built himself q house, and mar
nied. His herds of cattle are numbered
by the thousand, his land has been
cut up for town lots, and he is ranked
as one of the wealthiest men in the
State.
This quick, wide-awake energy which
acts as 1eaven in character is partly
natural But it can be inculcated by
parents and acquired by boy, if he
chooses to keep his eyes open and to
act promptly and boldly in every emer-
poncy
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08
German for "In the Soup.''

That more or less popular phrase,
@In the soup" it may not be gen, ally
known, has long been in use in differ
emit forms among the Germans. For
instance, der sitzt in der bruhe" Gle
sits in the soup"); @Er hat SIGH cine
schone suppe eingebrockte" Gle has
made nice soup for himself, meaning
he has put himself in bad fix"); and
~Er muss die eingebrockte suppe selbst
essen" Gle must eat the soup he has
cooked himself"),
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

A New YORK physician who attends
numerous charity patients in the south
eastern section of that city, says the
standard of morality is higher among
the Central European Hebrews of that
region than among any of their neigh
bors of different race and creed. The
Jews, too, cut loose quickly from char
liable assistance.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08
Stealing a House.

Stealing q house is an act of rather
cumbersome larceny; but this peculiar
feat in criminality has been practically
accomplished in Paris. Nine. CASTOR,
q wealthy widow, went to Nice in order
to enjoy for a while the balmy breezes
of the South, and she accordingly
closed her suburban villa at Abort
vile. In the meantime local tiler, or
slater, by name Bossonay, cast his eyes
on the villa, and, entering it one morn
ing with four companions, he calmly
appropriated not only its internal fur
niture and fixtures but its doors, win
dev4 uncovered MOOT marble man
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

WHEN coal was first introduced in
London an outcry was raised against
burning it, on account of the smoke.
A law was passed prohibiting it's use
for fuel, which, being disregarded, the
law was strengthened by making the
burning of coal capital offense. It
is recorded that one man was executed
for transgressing the law.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

SIR THOMAS GLADSTONE left an es-
tate of 46, 900 acres in Kincardineshire,
which passes in fee-simple to his son
Sir John, who is an uncompromislng
Tory. The estate is a magnificent
wooded country, and is overlooked by
Fasque House, one of the finest man
sions in Scotland.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

The Board of Education, of New
London, Conn, reporting on orthogra-
ply in the schools there, gives forty
nine different ways in which the word
busy" was wrongly spelled, thirty
seven ways of misspelling (which, "
ninety-nine ways of misspelling
whose" and ffty-two ways of misspell-
ing Scholar"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

According to Mr.. Cannon's statistics
there are 1911 Mormons, of whom
49, 1902 are children and 81, SIT officers
of varying degrees, from deacons to
apostles. This gives one officer to every
three Mormons, excluding the children,
or one in five of the whole population.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

New YORK CRY has lately bor-
rowed 100000 at q per cent. inter-
est, the lowest rate on record. The
loan runs forty years, and is exempt
from taxation. About one-third of the
amount commanded a premium.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08
Advertising Stamps.

A firm of great genius has offered
the British Government an immense
sum for the use of the national post
age-stamp for advertising purposes.
The advertisement is to be printed on
the back of the stamp before the gum
is put on, so that the purchaser of ev-
cry stamp must see the announcement
before he moistens the gum. This is
an Australian idea.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

FARMER DuTToN, of Ellisville, n. Y,
searched high and low for his fathers
will after the old gentleman died, near
~ ten years ago. Last week he took
mp the family Bible, and the missing
paper was found between the leaves. It
had been there all the time.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

, A CURIOUS result of being hit with a
baseball is reported from Philadel-
phia. A suffering man was struck in
the mouth and when he got well the
impeachment in his speech had disap-
peared.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

NOTES AND QUERIES thinks @vase"
should be pronounced to rhyme with
@face," "grace," cease" instead of hav-
ing the affected pronunciation of
"vawz," lately given it. Rhymes from
Pope, Byron, Moore, and Keats are
given in support of the old-fashioned
pronunciation of the word.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

Mrs. ELLIOTT F. SHEPARD proposes
to erect in New York a large seven
story fire-proof structure and present
it to the Young Women's Christian As
sociation, to be used as q lodging house
and home for workingwomen.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

WARRANTS have been issued in
Washington for the arrest of two en-
ployes of the National Museum for
stealing alcohol in which fish, snakes
and lizards were being preserved and
selling it to local druggists for making
bay RIM
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

The Rev. DR.. Talmage is credited,
no doubt wrongfully, with this odd ex-
ample of mixed metaphor: 1--WE pur-
sue shadow-the bubble bursts and
leaves ashes in our hands,"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

children. He has just returned after
twenty-nine years. wandering in all
parts of the earth. He finds his chill
dren grown up and married and his
wife living with another husband.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

JAMES GORDON BENNETT seldom drops
into poetry, but when he does it is to
produce little gem like the following
when the angels made shad
The devil was mad,
For it seemed such feast Of delight;
So, to ruin the scheme,
BE jumped into the stream
And stuck in the bones out Of spite
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08
The Man Who Guards the President.

One of the most interesting charac-
tiers connected with the White House
is Waterman who keeps guard over
President Harrison's household from
midnight until morning. His name is
Thomas Pendel, and he has been in
the service of the Chief Executive ever
since Lincoln held the position. He
was . personal witness of the tragic
termination of the war Presidents life,
and he has in his possession at present
the broadcloth frock coat that Lincoln
wore when he attended Ford's Theater
on the night when he was assassinsted
by Booth.
He saw President johnson come in
and out of the White House during the
latter's impeachment trial by the SEN
ate. He served under Grant and
Hayes, and during their administra-
tons witnessed many changes in the
White House. He kept solitary vigil
in the main corridor of the White
House during the time that Garfield
fingered between life and death, before
he was removed to the seaside. He
was with Arthur, too, and, although .
stanch Republican, continued in his
position under Cleveland's Democratic
administration.
Mrs. Cleveland he learned to like so
well that very good picture of her
now ornaments his mantel at home.
When he first went into service his
hours of watching were during the day,
but recently his time has been changed
to night. He is the only one remain
ing of the four who were with him
under Lincoln. -Washi11gtOp Post.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

JAMES STOKES, of PENIS Manor,
Bucks County, Pa, is thirteen years
old, weighs $50 pounds, and is grow
ing heavier rapidly.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

The Young Mems Republican Tariff
Club of Pittsburgh has over 400 mem
bers, and club-rooms furnished at a
cost of $S1, ZOO.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

HERE'S some characteristic news
from the London Times: "Robt. Lin
coin is a brother of the famous war
President and an excellent Judge of
horsefesh."
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

JOHN D. JENNINGS, the Chicago real
estate millionaire, who died few days
ago, was called the father of the ninety
nine-year lease system. His estate
amounts to more than $5,OOO,OOO.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

SUCH thing as bringing libel suit
against newspaper has not been known
in Italy for fifty years. The belief is
that newspaper seeks to tell the
truth. If it is mistaken frank state
ment to that effect satisfies the Italian.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08
TOPICS OF THE TIMES.
A Choice Selection of Inter-
esting Items.

The great fire IN the imperial palace
1t Pekin is reported to have caused q
loss of 1000, 900 to s., 500, 900.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

PHoroGRAPHER-N sir, the expos
ure is about to be made. Put on q
pleasant expression. Think of some
thing agreeable wife, for in
stance. The same "a moment later)E
Good heavens, sir! You have cracked
the camera.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08
How q Medieval Monarch Went to Bed.


First, a page took torch and went
to the wardrobe where the bedding was
kept. The articles were brought ont
by the keeper to four yeOmen, who
made the bed, while the page held the
torch at the foot. One of the yeomen
searched the straw with his dagger,
and when he found there was no evil
thing hidden there he laid bed of
down on the straw and threw himself
upon it. Then the bed of down was
well beaten and q bolster laid in its
proper place. Then the sheets were
spread In due order, and over these
was laid fustian. Then came q @pane
sheet, which we now call counter
pane. Finally the sheets were turned
down and some pillows laid on the boil
ster, after which the yeomen made q
cross and kissed the bed where their
hands we're. And then an angel carved
in wood was placed beside1he bed and
the curtains let down. After this .
gentleman usher brought the kings
sword and placed 1t at the beds head,
and the whole was then delivered into
the custody of groom or page, who
watched it with light burning until
the king retired to rest.-Pages or Hts
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

THOMAS COLEMAN, colored boy of
fourteen, in Anacostia, d. c., thought
he would have some fun throwing stones
at pigs in pen. One of the pigs be-
came enraged, broke out and COM
menced eating the boy, first attacking
the thigh. His cries brought help, but
his injuries were serious.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

CONVERSATION warns the mind, !"
said Benjamin Franklin. That won't
do for children, however. The slipper
or boot-jack beats conversation all hol-
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

"I AM tickled to DEATH" exclaimed
John Grant, Utica man, as he heard
the climax of story. Then, consist
emily with his allegation, he fell over
and died
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

NEW YORK is to have a new club of
women called the Dorothy" It's OBJ
ject is to provide a comfortable and
convenient home for the exclusive &C
commodation of ladies coming into the
city unattended,
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

MISTRESS Severely eBiddy, is that
man who comes to see You so often
your husband? Biddy = No, mum.
But Father Mulcahey says he ought to
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

AARON HARVEY, q sea captain of Ma
chias, Me-, departed on . voyage in
1850, leaving ct home . wife and five
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

The Gar of Russia, according to an
English traveller, wears silk strap
around his waist in place of suspenders.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08
A HANDSOME HOT9E=

The residence shown in the design hare given be erected for
close inspection OF the floor
would hard improve stone the FIRST stoy op
boarded and the second story
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

What is the height Of zeal? When
. newspaper reporter precipitates HIM
self from the third-story window N
order to get beat.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

The first pair Of slippers Adam and
Eve when they slipped up on banana
peel
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

A BOOK Of Western travels is entitled
@Afoot In Chicago" It must be i'm
menSe.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

PHILIP ARMOUR is said to give away
nothing less than S. tips to walters,
train hands, ETC., when he travels.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

TIE natives Of India reverence rats.
This u rough on cats.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1889-06-08

DANIEL BAUGH, who lives at Scots
burg, Ind, celebrated his Tooth birth
day anniversary by dancing jig.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-09-08
AN .EMPEROR'S DECREE.
BY EDWARD S. VAN ZILE.
WRITTEN FOB THE D1spArcH.J

Men Of my realm" he said, "and You
who bring your case to this the court Of last
resort, listen to your King. I have heard
the facts in this most foolish suit and have
been annoyed. There Is not, as it seems to
me, truly honest man left in my domain.
The egotist is all supreme. You boast OF
your wealth, your wife, your babe. NY
courtiers stand about feeling proud that
they possess neither wealth nor wife nor
bape. Our young men boast Of their strength
and our old men claim to be wise.
Homely women think they are fair and
fair women try to seem bright. Even
The children who play at our knees smile
in an egotistic way. Conceit in all its forms
is rampant in the land love 50 we'll. I
have held counsel with the truly wise men
OF my domain They tell me to be firm. /
shall be, Iassure you. The egotist must go.
There is in my vast empire no room for him
who feels in his pufed-up heart that he is
greater than the worm which vriggles be-
meath our feet. Listen, then, all Of you,
and let the Lord Keeper of the Scrolls note
carefully my words. If hereafter any one
OF my subjects shall express by word or deed
or manner overweening satisfaction in his
achievements, his possessions or his appear
ance. he shall lose his head. Any case
.AASA Comco uuucE Tie 4cW law buall Dc
tried by me and my advisers. You may 20.
The suit which led to this command is of
too trivial character to call for my decree.
And. take heed, all Of you, how you give
voice to the egotistic thoughts that are boil
ing in your BRAIN"
One by one the courtiers fled from the
hall, casting dark looks upon the last eoun-
selor, the thin, evil-looking Ramek, the
King had summoned. to his throne. But
Ramek, the wise, needed not their looks as
he ulucked fowerin the garden and placed
it in his bosom. For well he knew he con-
trolled the ear Of the king. and when he
wished to raise storm the royal clouds
would answer to his word. And in this case
he had his ends to serve, for he loved the
daughter of the King and feared that his
rival, Prince Hamassar, had already won
the hand of the Princess Bru.
Then throughout the city spread the news
of the Emperor's decree. Over mountains,
plains and rivers travelled the words of the
new law, and in distant villages the people
groaned in fear that their King was growing
old and harsh. The faces of the women
wore sarcastic smiles, and playfully would