Morning journal and courier., 1889-05-23
EARTHQUAKE.

| A woman with a hose ought to be very particular about her hose, for her aesthetic 1 neighbors' sake.-SoEerville Journal. ! It is not good for man to be alone. If yor ! don't believe it, and want to be convinced ask some other fellows old-maid sister, ! Somerville Journal.
 | The good old gentleman who is fifteen ol { twenty years behind the times usually hat
 son who is rapid enough to make the | average about right.-Merchant Traveller. Quillpen-"Have you laid by anything since you took up the profession of author ship, Scribblera" Scribbler-"Yes; about three hundred rejected manuscripts. Bur lington Free Press.
 Ella-"How could you tell that your hus- band lost money at the races to-day when he said nothing about its" Stella-'I know he talking about the advantage of saving money.'-The Epoch.
 After joining an athletic club, attending boxing school and being able to lift 195 pounds dead weight, Alonzo Wheeler, 8 resi- dent of Columbus, was licked by woman with broomstick. It's no use trainin' agin ,em.-Detroit Free Press.
 Annie Daily of Syracuse was told that ar- senic would give her a beautiful complexion.
 She took some on her bread and butter, and demonstrated in most graphic manner what
 Hamlet meant about to this complexion must
 we come at last.-Boston Transcript.
 "What's the occssioni" queried the tramp
 as hecame to the dozen or more carriages
 before home on Fourteenth avenue.
 Funeral" answered one of the drivers.
 "Old or youngs"
 Baby, I believe"
 "Good! I struck an old man out here for
 a quarter the other day, and was afraid the
 shock had killed m."-Detroit Free Press. Mrs. Oldrich-'I was very sorry to miss
 you last week. I thought l had hit upon
 your day to be at home. Have you changed
 its" Mrs. Newcome-"Oh, no; I have no
 regular day." Mrs. .Oldrich-'But your card
 says Thursday" Mrs. Newcome-"Yes,
 isn't it convenient? I noticed them at the
 stationer's. They're such neat reminder. I
 have pack for every day in the week, 50 that
 folks will remember just what day called" Boston Commercial Bulletin.
 Deacon Jones-s'And so you really think
 that you have met with changer Young Convert-"Yes, feel the time has come when must forsake my sins and errors By the way, that reminds me. What 8 confounded lot of errors the Muffers made yesterday afternoon. If they'd had Sliney in the box and Nippers behind the bat"
 Deacon Jones-"But, my. young friend. there's something more vital than base ball. Young Convert-"Oh, stow thati Some- thing more vital than base ball What yer giving of us, anyhow"-Boston Transcript. "As a member of the committee of ar- rangements," said the caller at the hotel, q want to find out what terms you can give to delegates to a convention to be held in this city next week. We shall need acoommoda- tions for fifty or more persons" ''Our reg- ular rates arc 8 50 per day." responded the landlord, ''but for party of fifty I can, of course, make considerable-By the way, what kind of gathering is it to bes' "It is the regular annual State convention of the Vegetarians' association" My rates" said the landlord emphatically, twill be $6 per day-"-Chicago Herald.
 Unknown Friends.-Some time during Monday night some kind-hearted but un- known friend left piece of rope about if teen feet long, beautifully noosed, on our steps present for our faithful work in this community. We took it in snd shall treasure it highly. The editors of the World, Herald, Times, and other New York sheets, toll from sun to sun and hardly known by name. Scarcely 8 day passes that we do not receive deadhsad tickets and beau tiful little mementoes to prove that the busy world is not too busy to remember us. Lum solis-which means, 'tis well.-Arizona Kicker, in Detroit Free Press.