Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1889-04-20
ICopyright 1881


The following questions have been selected
for answer this week:
l. Wi! you kindly tell me If white shoes should be
black costume? ~
1. White shoes are not now worn at all. The
most fashionable shoes for evening wear are
ties or CATERS of ONE leather.
Ian~colored gloves are generally worn with
black costume.
WEDDING RECEPTIONS
ATTENDED wedding reception, and. upon entering
most formal greetings passed on thrnnyh the room TO
an 9d(oinine apartment as there We're many guests
!ostgni'y to again speak with her. Should have
leave Should snd sas have Ta made iS an e.
fort TO come - me:
You should have found opportunity to take
leave OF your hostess. 1t is not incumbent
upon the bride to seek ont her guests; she
should remain in one place.
Is i proper fog the gentleman the lady the
The fan is for the lady. A gentleman might
relieve lady of her fan for few moments
especially if she is fatigued. but the fan in the
lady'S hand. if rightly handled. is graceful,
elegant and forms part of her costume
R.s.v.P.
Should r. S Y be inserted notes of invitations
1t lis now thought to be in better taste to
omit this request for the reason that il may be
does not know what is proper to be done. All
invitations should be responded TO. and hence
Il. ). '. p. is considered unnecessary.
ANNOUNCING AN ENGAGEMENT.
I. How should young lady announce to her friends
that she Is TO be married when the marriage will be
witnessed by none but the family: Is there no way
but to call and announce the fact!
-, + the linen Of trousseau expected to 90 to
have it pressed that the lace will not have TO be
starched and spoil its b anty?
l. There is no regular form of announcing an
engagement of marriage Sometimes il is en-
trusted to friend, who takes occasion to make
II known, or dinner party may be given either
by the family OF the bride-elect or that of the
groom. the friends of each being present. and
the host at the close of the entertainment an
nounces the fact.
2. The linen Of a trousseau should generally
be laundried, but where there is much lace 1t
may be pressed If the owner prefers.
he f hsSa i ie his & for lady in Pea
SMITH
1t is customary for wives TO refer to their
husbands by their titles but it is in better taste
to add the name. Instead of 1.-The colonel said
so and So say Colonel Smith said" &c.
THE USE OF SEALING WAX.
!. Please inform ne if il is still good form TO use
sealiyl, WY IN sDe,jgJ cfrrsst,D5sncs ' W use
= Would like instruction with reference to station
l. IL may not be reasonable to use wax for
sealing letters, but under no circumstances
could 1t be bad form. Wax gives a letter an
elegance and distinction that makes it ALWAYS
appropriate. What can be more inelegant than
I the custom of sealing letters by mucilage
moistened with the lips. A Frenchman once
challenged an Engishman for sending him a
letter sealed with wafer on the ground that
no gentleman should send another his saliva.
:. Note paper should be unruled, white with
out ornamentation and with envelopes to
match. Note paper folded once and inserted
III square envelope is considered the most
elegant.
l. At a luncheon where boulion is served should
you drink IT out OF the cups sip it with spoon:
married the same day the present is sent which wonId
cohgrstu. atiOns and best wishes"
l. Should be drank out of the cups.
2. with best wishes, only, and not with con-
gratuiatIons. Congratulations can only be
properly addressed TO the groom.
rehta Ps a vino hHTe Gesh m mourning desire to
They must leave cards at their friends and
acquaintance, an intimation that they will
now receive visitors and make calls In cases
where cards of inquiry have been received
during their seclusion cards should be sent
with the words, Thanks for kind inquiries
ESQ. OR MR. on LETTERS.
]. Which is the proper way to address letter to
gentleman: MIR. Y. L. Jacks" or 'Y q. Jacks Esq &"
. Should note to person living in the town
as writer be sent by mail or messenger Could it
. When I note is lett by writer or sent by mes
phrases: Addressed, Present, In Haste, En- Vile, En-
kndness Of Be&rer c1aresy of prfFr or
must you name the friend?
rrecede their children to abie and dinner lunch
supper Sc Is Eren should the host and hostess ad-
vance in the dining first, should the host 70
before the guests aud hostess after them or
the hostess first and the host last State clearly which
: a wi VIII
be her nositon and II she has brother living
l. In this country usage isnot uniform. In Eng
land esq" must always be added to the name
OF the person addressed. if he is a gentleman
This rule is adopted by many persons here. but
others disregard it. Punctilious people gener-
ally act upon 1t, and tradesmen also recognize
1t IN addressing their customers, as a patron
might deem 1T impertinent to be addressed
otherwise.
2. letter for a person living in the same
town can be sent by mail, or messenger, or de-
Iivered in person.
3. Ofwhat advantage are anv of these phrases?
Use none.
4. Upon the envelope of letter sent by a
friend write "Polteness of Mr.. -" whatever
the name may be.
5. In the family it is natural for the elder
members to take precedence of the Younger
At - dinner party the host offers his left arm to
the Oldest or most distinguished lady present.
other guests then follow, the hostess coming
last upon the arm of the gentleman she has
asked to take her in. But if the dinner is given
IN honor of some gentleman it is proper for the
hostess to go first upon the arm of this gentle
man, the host coming last. If the head of the
house is a widow then, of course she is the
head of the house, and her position is not diff
ferent from that of married woman. 1t may
be, however, that the house is not hers but the
inheritance of her son, and in this case her po-
sltlon is solely by the consent of the rightful
heir. Everything depends upon circumstances.
In England, for instance. the son becomes the
head of the house, and the widow gives place
at once to the sons wife, if he has one. or re-
mains solely by the consent of the new owner.
THE wEDDING-DREss OF A WIDOW.
What is the marriage costume of widow
widows wedding-dress differs from that Of
other brides. only in her wearing neither veil
nor orange blossoms.
Does widow put upon her visiting cards her hus-
bands Christian manner
No; widow is not supposed to require visit
ing cards under a year after her husbands de-
mise, and then she uses her own Christian
name. This is the strict rule, but many widows
insist upon retaining their husbands Christian
name, partly as a means of identification and
partly in reverence and affection for the name.
Should package containing gift be opened in the
presence Of the giver, If other than an intimate
friendS
There is no reason why it should not, as
otherwise it would look like indifference.
In entering room at reception party should the
lady appear on the arm of her ESCORT
The time was in American society when the