Beverly banner. [volume] (Beverly, N.J.) 1877-1964, 1889-10-19
VARIETIES.
Thought is power.

HSiJ ways obOi 1s
A colicky baby at night is athletic.
1t can raise the house.
There is nothing so holy (and mex.
pensive) as sisters love.
Vinegar is sharper when it has
good mother" So is boy.
Loyalty is the highest, ~ est and
most generous of human virtues.
1t is vain for you to rise up early if
the kitchen chimney will not draw.
You cannot measure mans daily
walk by the thickness of his carpet.
When l say that l know women,
mean that | know that | don't know
them.
Samuel Colt, the famous revolver
manufacturer, was blacksmith in his
youth.
A rising joker-The boy who bends
a pin inadvertently sits down on it
himself.
One may ruin himself by frankness,
but one surely dishonors himself by
duplicity,
He-What would you do if should
offer you a kiss : She-See if my little
brother is under the sofa
A Sympathetic atmosphere sur
rounds Boston tramp-one Of the
might-have-beans, you know.
Garry dollar and nickel in pock-
ct with hole in it and you will lose
the dollar and save the nickel.
Truth crushed to earth will rise
again, but by that time the funeral of
some ones character is all over.
Crusticus says in summer time he al
ways fears squall upon the beach, be-
cause there are SO many babies there.
"How do you like my boy, Mr..
Brown? Nice quiet little fellow about
the Office" Eyes. He doesn't snore."
When a man gets three sheets in
the wind" it is time for him to wrap
the drapery of his couch around him."
Intelligence will everywhere and
always establish the health of the
human mind Ignorance is its malady
and its curse.
When a modern youth becomes es.
conced in a street car, the ladies dis
cover that he doesn't belong to the
rising generation.
Those ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS seven
wise men of Greece never got in the
soup, because they remained in the fat
of their native land.
The bread of sorrow is leavened
with error, mixed with impudence,
kneaded with perversity aud baked in
| the oven dissipation.
Pride, like the magnet, constantly
points to one object, SELF but unlike
the magnet, it has no attractive pole,
but all points repels.
Prodigal-"If had so much money
as you, | wouldn't be so careful of it.
Economy-"That is the very reason
you will never have it.
"The love Of fattery," says Swift,
Gin most men proceeds from the mean
opinion thy have of themselves; in
women from the contrary.
People live to a great age nova
days do they not, doctor p YES but
don't indulge in false hopes. They
usually are men of brains"
Mistress (to new servanU: "We
have brea kfast generally about eight
o'clock" New Servant-"Well, mum,
if amt down to it, don't wait"
In the Park-Proud mother (piqued
that her child's advances meet with no
response from fair stranger)-"Wny,
baby dear, that's not your grandma !"
1t has been determined that tor
toise can walk mile in four hours A
messenger boy may not make as good
time, but he has more fun along the
road.
1t does not follow that all men are
honest because they are poor; and
have known some who were friendly
and generous, although they had
plenty Of money.
THE worst Of these cAild's banks"
said fond father the Other day, sis
that it takes SO long to get the money
out Of them when you are i'll hurry
to catch Il train"
A Hindoo has reduced laziness 60 \
fine art. He says: at is better to
walk than to ran, better to stand than
to walk, better to sit than to stand
and better to lie down than to sit"
Tramp Thank ye, ma'am, for
givin'. me the grub, but can never eat
without a fork" Farmers wife
swell, amble along, and You will find
fork in the road little further on"
Bloodgood-"Bigsby is a great
walker, understand that he covered
a mile in ten minutes yesterday" DE
Smith-"Pshaw With his feet he
ought to be able to cover mile stand
ing still"
Pat, in gaping wonder at the letters
on Hebrew butchers sign; "Here
Mike, It's yerself as has the foine
larnin'. Can yez rade that now :"
"No, but if had me flute here / be-
lieve | could play it."
Pain and sorrows are mysterious.
Inexplicable often it is in our life why
we are ffiicted but sometimes the
veil is drawn aside, and we can see the
reason clearly. In Gods counsels
sorrows draws out good.