The Portland daily press., 1889-04-16
ALIfe Made MisarahIe

Guo Vtdoo WtS6fdDt6
BY dyspepsia Is scarcely worth the living. A ca
PRECIOUS appetite, heartburn, puzzling nervous
symptoms, increased action of the heart after
eating, sinking in the abdomen between meals.
and hatulence after. are among the successive
t,ldfcia Of this harassng complaint. Two things
Hosteter's Stomach Bitters and persistence in
use. These remedial measures being adopted a
cure Is certain. Taken Immediately before or
after meals, this great stomachic promotes secre-
tlon OF the gastric julce the natural solvent of the
food. The nervous and bilious symptoms conse-
complaint gradually yields to the corrective and
inyigorating influence of the Bitters. Appetite
returns, sleep becomes more refreshing, and as a
sequence, the body is efficiently nourished, mas
cular power increases, and the mind grows san
guine Use the Btters for chills and fever and
The musician was very sick. He was fiddler,
professionally called aviolinist, and posterially
called yirtuoso. He was man of standing at
concerts. He was so i'll that he had to send for
doctor.
How am I?''
"How do you feel?"
/ feel pretty we'll"
Then you've very sick. Yours is disease the
danger OF which is In inverse ratio to the sensa-
tion.n
IAN going to die?"
II shouldn't wonder"
For heavens, sake doctor, keep e,alive for
few days. must live couple Of weeks if posi-
"Why?"
:, II want to learn the harp. don't want to 20
there as an amateur."-San Francisco Chronicle
AWoman who IS weak, nervous ana
sleepless, and who has cold hands and feet can
not feel and act like well person. Carter's Iron
Pills equaze the circulation, remove nervous.
ness and give strength and rest.
After Susan B. Anthony had lectured at Ripop
she took walk on Sunday around the graveyard
there. While enjoying the literature of a tomb
stone, she heard some little boys saying THAT'S
her!"
"Such is fame" she refebted; and turning TO the
boys, said blandiy;
"WhO am ~"
,"Hoi KNOW replied one urchin. YOU'RE
the old woman what walks up the wire Oh the cir
Gus tent tomorrow"
BEEcHAM's PILLS cure billions aid nervous in.
Great Row about Small Matter:
Passenger (sprlDging from his berth) -Captain
Captain, alloy! Is the ship sinking?
Captain-0h, no; the mate is only setting the
watch. ''0
Passenger (dlseusted)- -Humphl suppose
n s dow up the boat starting Il if should STOP
Why aott you get one Of those light-running,
overboard.-Jewelers' Weekly.
When Baby wac sick. we gaze i IN, r..
When she was Child. she crtsi fnr 'gsir,ss,
When she became Miss. she clam; to .n,,t,,ri,.
When she had Children, she gave them Cas,torri
Janitor-Have you any children, sir?
Mr. Kidby-Yes three.
Janitor-I can't let you have this fiat, then
Mr.. Kidby-But my children are all married.
Janlt0r-lt doesn't make no difference.
Mr.. Kidby-They live out in Chicago.
Jantor-Cant help it sir; the owner says he
won't rent TO nobody who has children under no
circumstances.-Puck.
mans wife should always be the
same, especially to her husband, but il she is
weak and nervous, and uses Carter's Iron Pills.
she cannot be, for they make her "feel like
different person." so they all say, and their hus
bands say so tool
Useful Instrument:
Musical visitor-What a handsome piano.
Mrs. Tiptop-Yes, do not know of any single
piece OF furniture have that am more proud
OF than of my piano. 1t was made at a cost Of
$4,000.
ylsitor-oh, must try-.why IT'S lockedi
ago and have forgotten 10 get another.
30 TO be dead and done with the trouble
That fills each day with dreary pain"
This is the moan of many a woman
Who thinks she can never be well again.
at were better for me and better for others
If 1 we're dead" and their tears fall fast
Not so, not so, wives and mothers,
There's bow of hope in the sky at last,
and IL tells you that the storm of disease which
has spread its shadow over you will give way to
the sunshine of renewed health, il you are wise
and try DR.. Pierce's Fayorite Prescription. 1t
can and will effectually cure all female weak
nesses and arrangements, and no woman who
has not tried it need despair, for trial will con-
vince her that it is the very thing she needs to re-
store her to the health she fears forever lost.
To cleanse the stomach liver and system gen.