Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1889-01-24
Helena, Montana, Thursday, January "a, 1889.
He WASN'T A Shelf.
The manufacturer and the Dignified Man
Have a Talk.

Have Talk.
A man with a hole in his hat, red nose,
and his coat fastened together with horse
shoe nail approached well dressed and digni-
fed resident of Brooklyn on Hamilton ferry
boat and said:
"Sir, see by the morning paper that we
are going to have colder weather"
The Brooklyn man looked at him hard, but
didn't commit himself.
~ was capitalist onct, to change the sub
ject," said the man with the storm signal nose
II don't look it now, do IT'
"No," replied the Brooklynite.
81 was, though. The last of large fortune
has gone"
'Whiskyg" inquired the Brooklyn man.
'No, sir" decisively replied the man with
the Illuminated nose. Nothing of the kind
Speculation, sir. l went up to Croton year
ago and bought brick yard tried all the
dif'rent receips for making brick that l
howed and they all failed. Do you reckon
orter have put salratus in them brick to
make em raiseg
II am not engaged in the manufacture Of
bricks" said the dignifed man coldly.
''Exactly-only wanted your private pin
ion, podner," answered the man with the edi-
ton de luxe nose. "Jess wanted to know If
you thought the bakin' sody would Of h'isted
'em. Didn't know nothing bout brick, you
see-mebbe orter used bakin' powder in 'em,
ehr'
~ don't know, sir" and the man from the
City Of Churches buttoned his overcoat up
under his chin.
'Them bricks o. mine wouldn't swell up an
fill the dish we baked 'em in, you know"
went on the ex-capitalist, as he pushed back a
lock of his hair that was escaping through
the hole in his hat II didn't have no re-
ceipts for mixin' bricks 'cept ones picked
up. had never run no brick bakery. l
want no shelf You know what mean by
shelf, do you?"
please have the goodness to direct your
remarks elsewhere, will your said the man
from Brooklyn.
''No offense, sir, no offense," went on the
other, fastening his coat little closer with
the horse shoe nail; II s'posed you was
acquainted with French, that was ALL amt
no desire to use language that you don't git
onto readily. meant WANT no head cook,
that's all Mebby l socAed too much yeast
them brick. Praps l orter made salt risin'
brick. Like enough l should "a set them
'em in the mornin' an baked 'em with
quick fire. Pro'bly it 'u'd been better to mix
a stiff batter and set on the stove and stir
constantly. What's your idees'
"Let me alone or I'll have an officer take
you in charge when we land"
Don't do it, don't do such thing. You
are successful in business-I failed, that's all
the dif'rence Sometimes l think orter put
more short'nin' in them brick. | al'ays said
that if ever failed, give me 50 cents an
clear conscience an I'd git to the top a'gin.
Give me the half an I'll try an make my
conscience do"
"No, sir!"
"Make it quarter an I'll rustic fer the
other twenty-five"
mot cent?"
"Call it ten, old man, an I'll bank it till l
touch another gent for the forty"
mo, sirl l believe that you ere an i'm
poster and that what you told me abont your
brick yard is false" and the dignified man
arose.
"Sir, do your worst" said the unfortunate
manufacturer, as he took another reef in his
coat Don't even make it nickel unless you
feel that you can spare it without weakenin'
your capital You may see the day when
you'll be standin' over mess of brick un-
certain whether to put in one or two pinches
of salt Au revoir-beg pardon-good-by!
New York Tribune.