The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-25
BRIGHT BITS

VERY. PLAIN..''Hans, you got punished to-
day; what for?'
Because, papa, Edward Lang had been
fighting"
"And with whom had Edward been fghting?"
with me, papa. "-Fgie0ende BLdtter.
Cant you stay little while longer?' asked
the criminal, as his kind friend was about to
leave.
mo, Bob, haven't time today"
We'll" SAID Bob, take some of mine; I've
got ten years more than want here. Life.
MERELY AN ExPERIMENT.-The Judge to
bridge jumper)-What induced you to commit
such foolnardy act.
The PrisOner-Please, yer honor, Micky Coy
said any fool could jump off that bridge, an 1
wanted to see if he spoke the thruth.-Hdrper' s
Bazaar.
AMATEUR PHoToGRAPHER-Tve got her mega
tive, old man,
.Tripodde-I thought you told me she wouldn't
sit for her picture.
Amateur Photographer asked her to sit
with me through life, and she said 'No."-BOs-
ton Herald.
Mr.. LusHFoRTH scratched his head reflect
lively and then remarked: Il forgot some
thing on my way home. and for the life of me
can t think what 1t was"
1T wasn't your jag, was it?" said his little
boy. u heard ma say that she supposed you
were late to supper because you were bringing
your jag home. "-Terre Haute Express.
Mr.. OLDBoY-My dear, when is your birth.
day?
Mrs. oldboy-why, James, the idea of your
not knowing. The fourth of November. Why
do you ask?
Mr.. Odboy-Well. I've lost my silk umbrella.
and was thinking it would be a good idea to
get you one for birthday present. Exchange.
A CANADIAN says that the muskrat houses are
higher this year and nearly twice as big as they
were last year. This, he says, means that the
coming winter will be twice as cold as last win
ter. But our weather is not governed by the
muskrat houses in Canada, where the winters
are regarded as being open If the snow is less
than two feet deep on level.-NorristO,on
Herald.
MAMMA what's hereditaryg' asked Bobbie
laboriously tripping over the syllables of the
long word
why, it is-it is anything you get from your
father or me, replied the mother, little puz-
zled to find a definit on suitable to his years
Silence of two minutes.
''Then, ma" he asked, sis spanking heredi-
tary?'- Health Monthly.
A BIG DIFFERENCE Newhand-Wh hat
Twenty cents a pound for mackerel? Why
the man across the street only asks 16 cents?"
Flshmonger--Very good, madam; but you
must rem nber that my fish are all hand
caught. Those you see opposite are caught in
nets. It makes difference, You know.
Mrs, NeWhand-Of course; how stupid of me !
You may give me that large one there.-Pltck
NATURAL ENEM1Es-Conductor (opening the
door and calling out hurriedlyJ-Are there any
surgeons in this car?
Response by two or three passengers-Yes,
sir
Conductor wild with excitement)-Hold your
selves in readiness, gentlemen. Two farmers
from different counties in Oregon are in the
next car inquiring about each others crops
Chicago Tribune.
''YoUR MAJESTY" said an interviewer to the
car. what was your object in presenting snuff
boxes to Prince Bismarck and his SOM"
ITO enable, a." replied his majesty, with a wink
OF the left optic, "about 800 newspapers In
America to get off those brilliant and compare
lively new jokes about somebody being up to
snuff and not to be sneezed at
Thanks" said the interviewer, 81 suspected
as much. '-NorriSto1cn Herald