The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1889-10-26
MAN ABOUT TOWN.
THE THROSTLE.

New, new, new, new! Is ~ ohoh on
new
That you carol so madly?
Love again, song again, nest again,
young again"
Never prophet so crazy!
And hardly daisy as yet, little friend,
See! there is hardly a daisy.
"Here again! here, hear, happy year"
o, MARBLE, unchidden, unbidden.
Summer is coming, Is coming, my dear,
And all the winters are hidden.
TENNYsON, Ne,c Rerie,c, Oct.
s'Haye YOU the Rule of the MOnk?'"
asked a young student at the DOCK
desk of Reddick's library.
ono, sir, l guess not; but we've
got the Rules of the Reddick's Library
Won't they do as well?"
Garibaldi seems to be back num-
Der.
A very fair story comes up from
StreatOr John - dled, ana MS
relatives at once proceeded TO procure
funeral notice. The printer was a
DOet. He was heavy on elegy, but also
stickler for accuracy. He combined
both in that funeral notice, which
read something like this:--
''The death angel smOte John -,
And gave him protracted repOse;
He wore billed shirt and a number
ten shoe,
And he had pink wart on his nose.
No doubt he is happier dwelling in
space
Over there on the evergreen shore.
His friends are informed that his fu-
neral takes place
Precisely at quarter-past four"
1t is perhaps unnecessary to state
that the relatives made short work OF
the printer-pOet. He was buried on
the same afternoon that saw John
consigned to ''prOtracted re-
pose"
Speaking of this man BOlzer," said
Mitchell, of the american Miller, III
reminds me of a circumstance con-
nected with his case. l was in Ut.
tawa just as he had had his first trial
and had been condemned to be hanged,
and, while walking along Columbus
street, met Rec Hit, who is EN-:
gagged in the case. Hold on, Rec.,' !
said, where are you gOing?"
"'Why, said Hit, it's like this;
This man Boiler has been condemned
to be hanged. | have just come from
situation at all. He just sits around
though he was waiting for his dinner,
instead of waiting for the rope to
choke off his wind. Pm going up after
the priest. I'll see whether he's going
to keep on acting like an idiot when
he may hang in a month. It's awful.
And Mr.. Hit got the priest, but
whether Boiler became fully conscious
of his awful situation at that time
cannot be said"
w. w. Taylor, of the Clifton, re-
ceived telegram from an Omaha gen
tleman the other day. This of itself
is not remarkable, but while arranging
his reply a compile of Chicago drum
mers entered, and hearing the word
'ChicagO" repeated several hundred
times Mr.. Taylor wrote: $40 -, -
St., Chicago" In about an hour the
messenger boy returned with the in
formation that there was no such
street in Chicago.
81 didn't send that message TO Chi
cago!"
"Yes, sir, youd did. Come over to the
Office and see for yourself"
Mr.. Taylor walked over, and there
was his message in black and white
*-t-x-t x-S-l-x-H-," said Taylor.
Nv
The other day, coming down town or
street Car, The Man" heard a hustle
and shuttle out on the platform that
seemed to indicate something out OF
usual going .On out there-enOugh at
least to demand an immediate investi
CATION: and arriving upon the scene
just as half-d0zen boys were picking
themselves up from the dusty street
The Man asked:
"What is the matter, CONDUCTOR"
"Oh, nothing: just dispellin' little
gloom"
He had merely kicked few young
darkies off the platform. That was
adjust then. About an hour later
the conductor passed the dispellin
place. He dropped off the car and
rolled into the gutter Some one had
struck him with brick Perhaps it
was the gloom
~
They had spent the summer very
delightfully."- together at Waukesha
and just as the season was drawing to
a close and he expected to return tC
his honorable but not lucrative posi-
ton as tape measurer at the Fair, he
ventured one moonlight night, in a
tentative sort of way, to see how the
coast line stood. So as they wandered
under the trees and lamented the dry
ing summer sOlstice, he said:
'And sweetheart-youl let me call
you sweetheart, won't you?"
''Oh, rats" she eXclaimed; ''call me
DenniS.'
And he feebly warbled under his
thin mustache, Il guess I'll call my
self Dennis"
~
She had returned to the seminary.
She had been belle during the sum-
mer and had had the world of young
men at her feet.
"Well, say, Blank" said one of the
boys. you didn't seem TO catch on