The Red Cloud chief., 1889-06-21
MISCELLANEOUS.

blessed are the poor. because they
can move instead of cleaning house.
Milwaukee Journal.
"A newspaper paragraph estimates
that there are 800. 600 railroad EN-.
ployes in the United States who 70
ceive annually $4OO. OOO. 900. an average
of $500 each.
The Times says it Is the custom In
Philadelphia to send young ladies q
dancing school up to seventeen OF
eighteen years Of age. and then turn
them loose on society to learn how "a
talk.
A New York lady won the prize
for furnishing the best recipe by which
. dinner could be prepared for 81. As
soon as her husband found this out he
borrowed the dollar and took his din
ner down town.
California boasts Of the extent and
splendor OF her fora. but . statement
in a local paper that "a Martinez
woman killed seven big tarsntulas in
her flower garden lately shows that the
love OF the beautiful has some serious
drawbacks there.
"A New York pilot says that If one
sailing craft a sneak past another in
distress without being signaled she
will do it nine times in ten. It costs
the owners money to feed rescued peo-
pie. and they don't encourage humane
actions.
-Highwayman - Hold up your
hands, Pedestrian-..My dear sir. I
have just returned from Oklahoma"
The deuce you have! Well. you can
get a good free lunch on the next block.
Good evening."-Nebraska State Jour
nal
At teachers institute in a back
country district in Maine not long ago
. w~ell-dressed. rather progressing
young woman rose to say. with refer
encs to educational methods: '.Ther
childrane OF my skule are gittin' on
weller with the new eddycational sys-
tim than they did with the old I'm.
cause its simpeller."
"A Norristown (Pa) father. on
making his nightly census Of his nine
sleeping children. to see that all wa
serene, found that one was missing.
After a rigorous and exciting hunt Of
the house and neighborhOOd the lost
one was discovered peacefully sleeping
in the family wash-basket into which
1t had crept at play.
"A teacher Of the Sebewa, Mich,
school. took a novel method of supply
ing a demand that the school board re-
fused to heed. She had each pupil
bring an egg. and then sold them at .
convenient grocery. With the pro-
ceeds she purchased towels and soap.
and the appearance of the children
after play hours is much improved.
Didn't Suit-Mother-"Well, did
you get that situation as Office boye:''
Son-.Nope." What was tho
natter" Don't know. Tho gent is
a lawyer. and he asked me if 1 wa .
good whistler. and l told him I was the
best whistler on our street. and he said
! wouldn'td do. Guess he must want q
professionally. Y. Weekly.
There is an old negress in Clarke
County. Georgia, who prepares herself
for death every night, and this is how
she does it: After a short prayer she
herself in . long. fower-be-
decked gown. plaits her hair carefully.
crosses her hands on her breast and
then falls asleep. Two coppers are
placed on the table beside her to put
upon her eyelids. She has directed
she be buried on the banks Of the
Oconee river, and believes she is going
direct to Heaven. She is angry beyond
as she wakes each morning
not having moved . muscle during
her sleep-and finds herself alive.
-''lt is a curious fact" said a we'll.
merchant the other day. that
the worse case Of snoring can be stopped
BY a low whistle. You don't believe
i? Well. there's my ohice boy asleep
Tow on an old box. Here him snore?
d curse you do. The dead could
hear him Now listen" The mer-
.hant gave one quick. low whistle and
he fog horn accompaniment ceased
instantly. although the lad still slum-
'ered. what are you doing?" then
lsked the mar Of business, as he reused
lis satellite with a shake. ..Nothin',"
Fas the instant reply Of the youngster.
Il was jest hearin' q Teller outside q
Fhistling like blazeA"-Albany Jour-
,al.
"A nervous young man, who called
m the President, fdgeted around for .
shile. then walked boldly up to him
md said: Some time ago / made IN
application for an appointment I
want it awfully bad IdOn't care for
t myself but the fact il, Mr.. Presi-
and here the young man blushed
o the tips Of his hair, Il am engaged
o be married. Unless I get this ap-
'ointment the engagement won't stard.
There you have it and now you know
Thy lam 50 anxious" It is said that the
ard bearing the name Of the applicant
md the Office he wanted was laid care