, 1889-03-13
THE NJ VOICE.
DIFFICULTY IN DESCRIBING THEM
ALL SATISFACTORILY.

Tho human voice is one of those tam
talizing things which can never be ade-
quately described, and yet which are
constantly tempting people to describe
them. The poets perspire in vain, and
the novelists pant a long way after them,
but nothing comes adequate to the sub
ject. Even the musical critics, whose
use of language is marked by an audacity
which the rest Of the world trembles at,
do not succeed. Nevertheless, there are
a few remarks which may be modestly
made on the outskirts of the subject.
COMPARED To ORGAN sroPs.
The human voice, in the first place, is
not a simple instrument, but n very COM
plicated organ, with n great variety of
stops You hear the glycerine stop, for
instance, when a man is trying to sell n
horse he doesn't want to part with" or
is persuading n friend to invest in the 500
Woe Mary James he happens to have
to spare"
Then man has another very useful
stop, he sucking love stop. When a
mans wife had to sit up for him he meets
her with the sucking dove stop full on;
you would think as he comes along the
passage, humming n psalm tune in It,
that he had just descended from the COM
pany of an innocent band of seraphim.
This stop is also made some little use of
in business, though the majority of men
have not sufficient face to play 1t sue
cessfully. Bold cabby very often has n
try at it. when he assures the stranger
in London, with tears in his eyes, that
the proper fare is Eve and sixpence; and
the skilled restaurant waiter turns it on
NNlan Ia, conn. tn, .l,,,It f-I .,,u-e 49,.
h wine supplied Ia actually what Is
named On the list. There are also other
varieties of masculine stop; such us the
mad bull stop, which comes into play
when the buttons oil again or the meats
underdon,-
Ladies' voices possess most Of the mas
culine stops and n few others besides.
They. however. make n little different
use of some of them. A lady, for in
stance, talks politics through tho glycer-
inc medium. and keeps the sledge ham
mcr for her domestic affairs, and for
training mankind in the way they should
go. She never uses her sucking dove
stop in matters of business, but keeps It
exclusively for affairs of n tender nature.
At the approach of any eligible man out
comes this stop at once, and all sho has
TO say to him has the seductive intonn-
ton of innocent candor. An exclusively
feminine stop is the w~oodpecker, spe-
cially designed in those crises in the
female economy known Familiarity as
''being out of sorts" This stop gives n
shrill, snappy timbrc to the music of
h lady's voice, which is much admired
by h hearers, when they have acquired
n taste for it.
Another feminine stop, and n pecu-
liarly beautiful one, is the Minnehaha,
or laughing water stop. 1t is not every
lady who has it in her organ, but when
she has, and plays upon it, the nearer Mt
once imagines himself under n green
canopy by the side of n sparkling rill,
and if he is not careful he sits there and
forgcts his train. The Minnehaha is the
queen of all stops, but, unfortunately,
has n terrible habit of changing into tho
woodpeckcr late in life.
PROFESSIONAL VOICES.
The above remarks are inspired by or
binary private voices. A more extended
view of the subject may DO obtained
from professional voices. The former
play on one organ of many stops, but the
latter have the run OF a great variety of
different Instruments, natural and artif-
cial. Tn stage, TO which one looks for
the ideal of what the spoken voice
should be, supplies us with some charm
ing examples. One especially beautiful
stage voice is that usually described as
bird like The bird voice is especially
affected by the young and innocent dra-
matte maiden, whose pride is TO remind
you of all the sweet songsters of the
grove in turn. While she is heart free,
she hops in n cheerful manner round the
scene, and emits little chirps, something
like n healthy sparrow devoid of care.
When the inevitable young man makes
his appearance, she puts on the swallow
and begins to twitter continuously; and
when he arrives Mt his declaration she
sinks into his arms with the true night
ingale gurglo and ends a pathetic scene
with n cadence of ~"jug-jug-jug." Then
when things get q little mixed and he is
thought to be faithless and to have taken
money from the till, she comes out
strong as a"pee-wit," and shrieks family
over her blasted hopes, much rs that
primitive bird docs over n worthless
moor. By and by there is n prospect of
things coming right, and she drops the
pee-wit for the canary.
N 5NS " = AAOAA lAAi "
hear sounds as though n canary were
fondling n fresh root of groundsel, and
when all is explained and he arrives
with the marriage license by the o p. m.
train, there is no more nightingale, and
the curtain comes down on n final jug"
The well trained jeune premiere runs
the gamut of the whole archaeological
tribe, and the experienced playgoer can
tell what the situation is from the
bird she is representing, even though he
is too poor to pay for a place where he
can see anything.
In the public meeting you hear the
turkey ~gobbling in explanation of the
object of the gathering, the bray of the
ass in moving the first resolution, and
the duck quacking in support, while
there follow the calf bleating an amend
ment, the cow lowing to Order" and
the clucking of a multitude of hens car
rying something simultaneously. 1t is,
of course, for the evolutionist to say