davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-11-15
DlSPENSARY HUMOR.
Even So Gruesome Place as 8 Hospital
 Has It's Funny Side.

Even So GruesOm0 a Place as Hospital Has Its Funny Side.
 woman who was being treated for stomach difficulty at the north end dispen- sary, writes Arlo Bates from Boston, found in the ash heaps of the dump 8 bottle con- tainlng some gruesome black mixture, and the next time she presented herself for ex- animation she brought it with her.
 "Doctor," she said, twill yer blaze to taste O thata l thought to take little last night; ye wouldn't believe the power O dis tress was in the whole blessed time." "Distressr' the doctor exclaimed in vex- ation; "I'm glad of it. Didn't tell you that if you kept taking things I wouldn't have any thing moro to do with youa"
 "Yes, know, doctor, an ax yer pardon. But couldn't bear to waste it, for fear 1t might be just the very medicine I'd need" And when she went away she asked for the bottle, as she had Q sister who was not well and she thought 1t might help her. . On another occasion happened to be in the room of the dentist of the dispensary when there came in an elderly Irishwomau with her daughter, strapping woman of two or three and twenty. The mother was urging the daughter to have tooth extract. cd, and 1t became apparent from the con. versation that they had been there the day before, but that the daughters courage had not been brought up to the sticking point. This time, however, the woman was per. suaded to get into the chair and to allow the dentist to examine her teeth; but upon the inquiry which was the offending tooth, the interesting fact was developed that there were none of the young woman's teeth par ticularly out of order, but that it being superstition to which she and her mother religiously held that whenever woman bore child she must lose a tooth, they had thought it best to have one taken out before it became painful.
 (Which one would you like mo to take outi" inquired the dentist, much diverted.
 70, shure an' it's yerselfll be after know. in' which one it'll be will be achin'," was the reply. 'It's her first child, an hos the fin. est boy ever yez laid eyes on." From which it will be evident that even so gruesome place as dispensary has it's humors.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-11-15

catch. In the body thou sayests then, per- chance, I know thee in a dream'"
 "Ay, O Queen, in dreams have we met"
 "Thou art strange man who talizest thus, but if what l hear be true, ono well learned; and, indeed, I do mlnd me of thy counsel when thou didst bid mo join my Lord Antony in Syria, and how things befeil according to thy work. Skilled must thou be in the casting of nativities and in the law of au guries, whereof these AleXandrian fools have little knowledge. Once knew such another man, one Harmachss," and she sighed; "but long is he dead-as would l were !-and at times I sorrow for him.' She paused, while l sank my head upon my breast and stood silent.
 Interpret nc this, Olympus. In the battle at that taccursed Actium, just as the fight ragged thickest and victory began to smile upon us, Q great terror seized my heart, and thick darkness seemed to fall before my eyes, while in my ears Q voice erred: 'Fla .jlu or periSln and 1 fled. But from my heart the terror leapt to the heart of Antony, and he followed after me, and thus was the battle lost. Say, then, what God brought this evil thing about:''
 'Nay, o Queen," answered, ''it was no God-for wherein hast thou angered the Gods of Egypt Hast thou robbed the temples of their faiths Hast thou betrayed the trust of Egypts Having done none of theso things, how, then, can the Gods of Egypt be wroth with thee. Fear not, twas naught but some natural vapor of the mind that o'ercame thy gentle soul madc sick with the sight and sound of slaughter; and as for the noble Antony, where thou didst go needs must that he should follow"
 And as spoke Cleopatra turned white and trembled, giancing ct me the yvhile to find my meaning. But well knew shat the thing was of the averaging Gods, for, by their will, l myself had some hand therein.
 "Lcarned Olympus,'' she said, not an- swcring my words; "my Lord Antony is sick and crazcd with grief. Like some poor hunted slave he hides himselfin yonder sea- girt tower and shuns mankind-yea, cen mo he shuns, who, for his sake. endures so many woes. Now, this is my bidding to thee. Tomorrow, at the coming of the light, do thou, led by Charmion, my waiting lady, take boat and row thee to the Tower and there crave entry, saying that ye bring tidings from the army. Then will he cause you to be let in, and thou, Charmion, must break this heavy news that Canidius bears |; for Canidius himself dare not send. And when his grief is past do thou, Olympus, soothe his fevered frame with thy draughts of value. and his soul with honeyed words. and draw him back to ne, and all will yet be well. Do thou this and thou shalt have gifts more than thou canst count, for am yet q Queen and yet can pay back those who serve my will.''
 ''Fear not, O Queen,"I answered, "this thing shall be done, and no reward ask l who have come hither to do thy bidding to the end"
 So went and, summoning Atoua, made ready q certain potion.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-11-15
To Eros.

Let lovers complain that their love's unre
 quited- Lalage and Doris and Phyllis alla three, With feryor intense which I've hardly in And astonishing ardor, all madly love me; And tho when with Phyllis my hearrs ar
 efame. My feelings for Boris find much the same; And still fair Lalage profoundly adore Omnipotent Eros, what would'st thou have
 moreI A heart in three fragments lay at thy shrine, :, A favorable hearing, pray thee, be mine, Merely settle tride on ono of the three Some three hundred thousand or so let it be;- When, praising the bounty which grants my
 request With soul filled with peace and g mind set at
 rest; ' And without hesitation further would state I'd follow rejoicing the 1eadings of Fate.
 -Mnbel Louise Fuller ip Life.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-11-15

FALLEN ANTOINE"
 he should die as yet; since, had he died at that hour, Cleopatra had made her peace with Caesar, who rather wished the death of Antony than the ruin of Egypt.
 "Art mad, Antony9 Art indeed Q cow ard2" cried Charmion, "that thou wouldst thus escape thy woes and leave thy partner to face the sorrow out alonel"
 "Why not, woman9 Why nots She would not be long alone. There's Caesar to keep her company. Octavianus loves 0 fair woman in hls cold way, and still is Cleopa- tra fair. Coma now, thou Olympu thou hast held my hand my dealing desaLi. upon myself, advise me of thy wisdom. Shall !, then, submit myself to Caesar, ard l, Fri umVir, twice Consul, and aforetimo abso- luto Monarch of all the East, endure to follow in his triumph along those Roman ways where l myself have passed in tri- umph9"
 "Nay, Sire,"I answered. .If thou dost yield, then art thou doomed. All last night 1 questioned of the Fates concerning thee, and this saw: When thy star draws near to Caesars 1t pales and Is swallowed up; but when it passes from his radiance, then bright and big it shines, equal in glory to his own. All is not lost, and while some part remains, every thing may be regained. Egypt can yet be held, armies can still be raised. C9sar hath withdrawn himself; be is not yet at the gates of Alexandria, and perchance may be nppeased. Thy mind Tn its fever hath fired thy body; thou art sick and canst not judge aright See here, have potion that shall make thee whole, for well skilled amI in the art of medicine" and held out the phial
 "A potion, thou sayest, manl' he cried. "More like 1t Is q poison, and thou q mur- derer, sent by false Egypt, who would fain be rid of me now that 1 may no moro Ee ot service to her. The head of Antony is the peace offering she would send to Cesar- she for whom have lost all, Give me thy draught. By Bacchusl will drink 1t, though it be the very elixir Of Deatha"
 "Nay, noble Antony; it is no poison, and no murderer am I. See, will taste it, if thou wilt" and held forth the subtle po- tion that has power to fire the veins of men.
 "Give it me, Physician. Desperate men are brave men. There l. Why, whatis this Yours is g magic draught! My sorrows seem to roll away like thunder clouds be- fore the southern gale, and the spring of Hope tlooms fresh upon the desert of my
 To be contlnue..
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-11-15
Vacations Over.

The sun shines with more sober light The bells ring out from belfry towers, The streets fill up with faces bright Like dusty roads with fairy flowers. The little shoes go hurryng past That scarce have lost the scent of clover. The old schoo-house awakes at last.
 Vacatiou's over. Like some great hive of buzzing bees, The school-house starts its drowsy humming And curls that danced meath summer trees Now quietly droop OCT sums and summing. The sun paint tanned on each weo hand Of mountain lass and seaside rover Is lost beneath an inky brand.
 Vacation's over. When school time comes the streets and parks
 With no small tongues to be disturbing Seem strangely Lonesome with their marks Of pencils sharpened on tho curbing And oh, those little folks ns yet About whose hearts no shadows hover, Are not tho only ones regret
 Vacations over
 -S. w. Norris, in N. Y. Mail and Express
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-11-15
POEMS OF THE PRESENT.
Her Rirthdav.

Her Birthday. My dear, on this your birthday Let me congratulate" "Oh, papal not another word, For am twenty eight! Twas we'll enough when in my teens To greet in such way, But now I think it foolish is To speak of one's birthday. What do linear? That for each year diamond largo you've bought And in necklace had them placed 'Twould please me, so you thought I'm charmed with such splendid gift Large diamonds adore! But-papa dear, do have 1t changed To hold but twenty-fourr' -Blanche Rosalie Leeds, in N. Y. Mail and Express.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-11-15
J. F. FLOOD,

CoR. LIBERTY AND MILL STREETS, Choice Liquors Ales and Wines. Fine Brands o
 Foreign and Domestic Cigars. Pool Table connected. t GIVE ME A CALL
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-11-15
The Dial's Shadow.

 Go. Cupid; say to her Hove, That roses fall and time is feeting, watch the dial shadow move, And wait-and wait-to give her greeting. For youth is sunshine on the dial, And love Is but an old, old story; The years may dance with lute and viol- The shadow moves-so ends their glory! Go, Cupid, beckon with your wing, That sweetest chance may wait her hither For we must WOO, remembering How fast the roses fall and wither. And oft the dial long ago. The pavement sunk with messy edges, Saw Youth and Love meet ell aglov, And whisper by the old yew-hedges. Go, Cupid, tell the maid prize How many in the courtyard wandered, What laughing lips and wtching eyes, In loves delight their beauty sQunnderedI The ru1s, brocade and buckled shoes, How softly down the paths they pnttered With gallants gay in old-world hues. When crowns and kingdoms little mattered Co., Cupid, sleep; your cheek is pale; And we can WOO among the sages; Romance is but weary tale Monotonous from all the ages.
  My heart! She comes from wonder door; And time and shadows fit for ever; Why, there was never youth before, And love like ours, oh, never neverl
 IN. Y. Tribune.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-11-15
Tho Girl fin the Calico Dres..


 My lady is naughty and grand, She's vision of beauty and art But fear that her dainty white hand Is softer by far than her heart Shall l come as 8 suppliant near her To be crushed when my love confessl An, no! there's fa1rer and dearer. X si=t Ii: a calico dress. lily laoy has money and style, She has dresses and gems by the score And lovers to strive for her sm flo Besides men and maid servants galore; But my heart sings as loud as q linnet Anu al, envy quickly repress, When hold in my arms just minute That girl in the calico dress. My lady is travelled and wise, She reigns at reception and ball, She kills, if need be, with her eyes, But she bushes, fear, not at all. Shes peonY proudly aspiring, With no fragrance lover to bless; But mignonette sweet and retiring Is my girl in the calico dress. My lady may freeze when I bow, Or as bright as an houri may beam; WatNl not her moods, for VOW That her charms very poor to me seem: For there's never mad in all story So worthy prinee's caress, And nothing so fair out of glory AS my girl in the calico dressl
 George Horton, in Chicago Herald.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-11-15
CHAPTER XVIII.

OF TIE DRAWING FORTH OF ANTONY FROM THE TIMONIUM BACK TO CLEOPATRA; OF THE FEAST MADE BY CLEOPATRA; AND OF THE MANNER OF DEATH OF EUDOsIus THE STEWARD.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-11-15

thrown open in the door, and an aged eunuch, looking forth, roughly asked our business.
 ''Our business is with the Lord Antony" said Charmion.
 "Then it is no business, for Antony, my master, sees neither man or woman.'
 'Yet will he see us, for we bring tidings. Go tell him that the Lady Charmion brings tidings from the army.''
 The man went, and presently returned.
 ''The Lord Antony would know if the tid- ings be good or i'll, fer, if ill, then will he none of it, for with evil tidings hath he been overfed of late."
 "Why-why, 'tis both good and ill. Opeu, slave, will make answer to thy master i' and shs slipped purse of gold through the bars.
 Well, well," he grumbled as he took the purse, ''the times are hard, aud likely to be harder; for when the lions down who will feed the jackals Give thy news myself, and If it do but draw the noblo Antony out of
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-11-15
Tho Old Tin Dinner-Horn,

Tho Old Tin Dinner Horn. When the blossoms on the tater and the tas
 sers on the corn, An the ripenin' tomaytesses s blushin' like the morn, Whom the pole beans young an tender on. the ingen an the beet An the cowcumber an oabbage's bout big enough to eat; When the yaller-leg spring chickens fried iu butter 'to turn" An corn pones hot an buttermilk's fest emptied from tho churn Oh, it's then love the music ot the tootin' Whom the blossoms on the tater an the tas sells on the corn. When the scorchin' sua O. summer pou.s down on fcllcr's back, '. An him a-workn' 1t to kill 6 pilin' up the
 stack; With tho dusty sweat a-pourin' down his face into his eyes, An the thresher keeps a-buzzin' like a pantry full of flies; When he feels about as holler as the everlastin, sky, , Then he gifts a sense O goneness nothin' else can satisfy | Like the appetizin' music of the tootin' dinner! horn, When the blossoms on tue tater and the tas: sells on the corn. Milk an honey, ham an eggs, and biscuits hot and light, Buckwheat cakes an tree merlasses 8 a mighty luscious sight; An roast spar rib an sweet pataters baked with sassidge-meat But buttermilk an' garding sass Is mighty hard to beat An when feller's empty from his buzzum to his boots Thes sight O hallylooyer in the satIsfyin' tOotS Of the wimmen folks a-blowin' on tho old tin dinner-horn, When the blossoms on the tater an, the tas. sers on the corn.
 Edwin s. Hopkins, in Judge.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-11-15

1EaaA RE IT was yet dawn = came Charmion once W a g a i n, Tn d w @ ~ walked to the pri-
 N vate harbor of tho a y palace. There, talk 7 ing boat, we rowed to y the island mount t where on stands the Timonium, q vault t d tower, strong, small and round. And having landed, we twain came to the door and knocked thereon, till at length a gratin was
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-20
The STOLEN TREASURE.
by
ERNEST H. HEINRICHS.

not take any part in these escapades of his
friend. Immediately upon his arrival in
the town he looked around for the wise men,
that heN might learn from them and be
taught in science and art. He soon found a
very old, gray haired wizard, whose reputa-
ton for learning extended all over the
world. This man knew all the secrets under
and above the sum. He knew the number of
hairs that would cover bald mans head; he
knew how long it would take a man with
out wings to fly to the moon, and he knew
how long 1t would take man without legs
to walk to the north pole. To this wizard
the wise young man went and asked him
whether he wanted an apprentice.
"I do" replied the old man, "but he
must be able to answer me one question"
will you. ask me and see whether I
will do?'
"Who do you think is the wisest person
in this world?"
You are" quickly replied the youth.
"Why?"
Because most people think themselves so
wise, that to inquire for other peoples wis
dom they believe to be Unnecessary
"You are certainly the wisest youth I
have ever seen," said the wizard, land be-
lieve ME am proud to call you my ap-
prentice"
From that day the two lived together and
the young man soon became known all over
the land as the wIsest youth that had ever
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-20
by

been heard of. Kings, lords, dukes, princes
and mobiles came to him and asked for his
advice on all matters, and he became famous
the world over.
In the meantime, however, his rich young
friend with the bag of everlasting gold, con-
tinued to squander his ducats in the most
reckless manner. .and, ,as just about this time,
the Kings treasury had been robbed, everv-
body said that the strange young man with
all the gold had stolen his wealth from the
Kings safe. So one beautiful morning
when the young man stepped from his mag
nifeent palace to go out and enjoy himself
as usual, the Kings officers were waiting
for him at the door.
"We arrest you in the name of the King, I"
they said, ''as the thief who robbed our royal
treasury"
His protestations of innocence were with
out the least effect, and instead of going to
enjoy himself the young man was taken to
prison. Heavy chains were put around his
wrists and ankles. He was given water and
dry bread for his only food, and he had to
sleep on the floor. The next day the officers
came into his cell and they hauled him forth
into the court room, where the King himself
sat on the throne to pronounce Judgment.
When the young man was asked whether he
was guilty of the charge preferred against
him he replied "No," but as he could not
bring any further proof the King said that
he would have to sentence him. The pen
atty for such serious crime as robbing the
royal treasury was death, and it looked very
much as if the young man with the money
bag would have to die.
Fortunately for him, however, the wise
young man had heard of the affair, and
when he saw the danger his friend was in
he went into the court and spoke as fol-
lows:
Your Royal Highness, this young man
is innocent of the charge of robbing your
treasury, and can prove it" Then he re-
lated about the gift from the King of
dwarfs, and when the King heard about the
bag with the everlasting gold, be said:
"Can you produce that bag?"
This, of course, the wealthy young man
could do, and, as be showed the King how
it worked, that monarch stated: 1.-THE
young man is honorably discharged if be
will make me present of that wonderful
money bagP'
"No, sir, replied the wise young man,
''that he will not do if he listens to nv
counsel. The bag is his whole fortune, but
l have no doubt that he will take enough
money from it to fill all the Golfers you have
in your treasury
swell, that will do" answered the King,
and the young man at once began to count
10000 900 ducats down on the table before
the astonished monarch and his amazed
courtiers
Everybody was pleased for moment,
but alter awhile the King said:
Gentlemen, am much grieved to know
that we have not been able to detect the real
robber of the Treasury, and for the safety of
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-20
HeaIthiS Wealth

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Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-20
1ntere.tIns YOUNG Church Membsr..

Oliver Wendell Holmes says he would
rather be 70 years young than 40 years DID,
Being physician, he suggests the ways and
means. Some of these are hygienic, others
are social; all are within common and every
day reach. Ministers especially need not grow
aged and musty. That fatal dead line'' of 90
by attention to DR.. Holmes prescription Of
plenty of fresh air and lively interest in the
outlying youth and health may recede as we
advance like any other will o. the wisp.
Here, too, is the secret of pastors hold on
the more youthful members Of his flock. Let
him be their friend, their companion. Let him
get at their thoughts. ways, purposes. Let MIN
fill his lungs with their ozone. Let him pre-
pare his sermons with one eye on the boys and
girls. In this way, being one Of them, he viii
interest and hold them. They'wi hear him as
they do one another-and with added interest,
because of his larger knowledge and wider ex-
perience. Brother ministers read these lines:
We live in deeds, not years; in thoughts, not
breaths;
In feelings, not in figures on q dial.
We should count time by heart-throbs. He
most lives
Who thinks most, feels the noblest acts the
best;
And he whose heart beats quickest lives the
longest
Lives in one hour more than in years do some
Whose fat blood sleeps as It slips along the
veins.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-10-20
THE GIRL WAS FORGIVEN,
How a Lady's Anger Was Softeuod BY a
Little Judicious FIatfery.
nni OH 1

How a Lady's Anger Was softenod BY a
Little Judicious FIatterv.
st. Louis Globe-Democrat.l
Ireceived letter yesterday which demon
strated that reform homes do some very
efectual work. Last spring I employed a
nurse girl OF II, and she was somewhat of a
daisy in her way until she grew weary,
which happened just when it was most un-
pleasant to happen. She left and took
very elaborate, costly basket. Small things
will Irritate even great men, and this ex-
asperated me. l tried every method to find
that girl and basket, even to a private de-
tective. In vain, though, but this letter
came, and said: Dear Sir-I am at St.
IS Home, and the Sisters have been so
good. 1 am so sorry that 1 took your basket;
won't you please drop me your address on
card so can bring it back? And won't
you let me come and see the baby, too, for
know it's pretty"
I relented at once, but my esteemed wife
only read the first part of the letter, and
sorrowlully declared she could not. Then
she turned the letter over and finished it.
II don't know but what you might write
her that she may-come and see the baby
anyway, and-never mind the basket,
hubby"
What mamma doesn't know the worth of
hattery.