Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-08-14
The Stolen Garlic.

aphce. w men Jne crop was almost
large enough for pulling, he placed
beside the bed portable hutch, and
slept there O. nights to guard against
thieves. After watching for many
nights without seeing signs of tres
passers, he concluded that there were
none about, and that he might as
well sleep at home so he left the
empty hutch beside the garlic bed and
spent the nights in his own house
When he came back next morning tC
water his vegetables he found that al
had been pulled and carried off.
In CONSERVATION aud tears he went
to the magistrate and entered com
plant of his loss. The magistrate
called him up for examination and
asked him why he did not seize the
thief.
Because, your honor, l was moi
there when he came"
"TheY why did you not bring as
witness some one who saw him 2"
Because, your honor, nobody
caught glimpse of him."
"Then why did you not bring from
the garlic bed some clew by which he
might be traced ?"
Because, your honor, he left moth
ing in the bed besides the portable
hutch which was there before"
very WE'LL" said the magistrate;
"since the hutch was the only object
known to be on the field at the time
Of the theft we will make the hutch
the defendant in the suit, and to-
morrow morning you will appear here
as plaintiff against it,"
The complaint and the result of the
preliminary examination were report
ed far and wide, with the official an
nouncement that on the next morn
ing a portable hutch would be tried
for the theft. So remarkable trial
had never before been heard of, and
it became the subject of enquiry, COM
ment and debate throughout the
neighborhood.
When the case was called the
court was crowded with spectators.
The constables brought in the hutch
and put it in the place of prisoners.
1t was charged with the crime, and as
it offered no defense the magistrate
ordered that it be beaten until it con-
fessed its guilt. The constables ad
ministered blows with will, leaving
it shattered to pieces. As the punish
ment proceeded the spectators gave
way before their sense of the ludicrous
and by the time the constables were
following up and whipping the frag-
merits of the hutch the audience were
laughing heartily.
III apparent rage the magistrate
charged the whole assembly with con-
tempt Of court, ordered all the gates
to be shut and locked, and fined each
person present pound of garlic, with
no release until the fine should be
paid. Many constables were deputed
to escort those who wished to go out
to buy garlic, and each merrily spent
a few farthings paying his fine.
In the course of the day all the
garlic in the market had been bought
up, and the adjoining hamlets had
been ransacked to supply the un-
wonted demand, each as he handed in
his fine, was required to tell where he
got the garlic, which was then deposit
ed bunch by bunch in chamber of
the courthouse.
When all the fines were paid the
plaintiff was invited to examine the
punches of garlic and state whether
he recognized any as his own. He
unhesitatingly declared certain bunch
es to be his, and when the record of
the purchasers was examined these
punches were found to have been all
bought at the stall of certain green
grocer. The green-grocer was arrest
ed and made to tell where he got the
stolen goods. He declared that he
knew nothing more about the garlic
then that he had bought it from
certain villager The vllager was
arrested, and was proven by circum-
stantial evidence to have committed
the theft. The magistrate thus got
for himself u great reputation for
sagacity. the thief got forty blows. and
the poor gardener had awarded to him
all the garlic that had been received
in fines for contempt Of court.-Ex.