New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1889-09-29
STARTING THE WINTER FIRES.
At so MUCH AN HOUR.


This ts the season of the year when the humorous
newsnaper makes its facetious remark about the
man setting up stoves. How does tho merry editor
Of that sort Of sheet delight to enlarge on TINS SUBJECT
How slvly he hints Of the language USED by the hea"
Of the house what aughabc matter II appears thai
the wife sat down on the floor and cried; how ninety
bo draws the scene whore the small boy tries to
insert the family cat in Joint OF the stoveppe by
tho TAIL No doubt the humorous editor makes good
choice of subject on which 10 exercise his sporive
non We have no desire TO crluclso
We only wish to say that the popular
idea that that more Opulent individual VINO hres d"
ovnert from the hardware store to mhaDilitate MS
stove is to be enved by the humber houSehoiher
who does the work himself is erroneous.
II has been said and generally believed that s'oVe
nine t,hor down in the spring will not go together
nronerv IN the fall even If you lay II carefully away
in the attic in the exact order in which 1t came down
and SIT on II all summer. It was left for Phl'aoel
mia man to prove the fallacy OF TINS oy ae'u"i
experiment-hO, according to recent copies I" u'u
PHILADELPHIA papers. finding last spring mat nc hdu
five or six months TO spare determined 10 Jest ,ho
matter and the result was that his pipe went toeethef
IN the most perfect manner. But this Is neither mere
nor tbere-the recent cool weather has reminded inc
Ncvr Yorker that the season Of artificial neat j. a'
hand and he sends 10 the haN"ar"
store for a man who skilfully bring toeemer on'
lengths of stovcpipe long since divorced ior lhoo"
Inability OF temper, and who UNDERSTANDS I"p@'lns
the detective furnace and prescribing for the asthma'
draught Of the open fireplace. and who knows VIVA,
IS best for the dsaranged mysterious m'ethai
economy Of the Baltimore heater.
II Is the popular belief that there Is no man so
destructive of time and innocuous to work a. inc
plumber. but we believe that the claims OF the heat
ing apparatus expert for distinction In the Same
lines should be considered. We suspect, however,
that he is really plumber in disguise; that though
I IN liz with SCOT his nose llsteAl
OF putty on his hands, that after the fires are We'll
started he will visit us with burglaEious looking
OF tools rolled UP in piece Of canvas and hold long
oommunions with the lead pipes, and come back and
visit them the next day, and the third day come
again and bring a bill for four days work. and with
the day OF the month and your street number added
n the slovenian and the plumber each have the same
general characteristics Each approaches his WORK
cautiously, and Is guarded and circumspect while IN
It's society. You cannot accuse either OF forwardnes.
or of encouraging undue familiarity ON tho
part of work when necessarily thrown In with H.
Each works by the hour And an hour with a man
who is putting up Is a. nothing. lie con.
sumes al hour In applying his haa,d ~ the work
another In taking II oil. lie goes down into the
basement 10 examine the furnace you forget about
him you do moi know him whsn he comes up--he
looks older and more mature. lie becomes a hihlr,
in the family-at 50 much an hour. At night you
II you do not ieel that your financial condilio'
%s nst yon !" 1I %aT S pa ~ your oS
the stcplmider trying TO force the pipe together viii
a hammer aud three caso-knives, bat think of tbs
ware store, Of how he moves nto tho hall 10 CIV,
thom plenty of nom, aud watches. thinking that the,
must do something the next hour, aud lsens iO hi
head man taking his assistant hio corner and len.
him u long humorous story, aud hears them laugi
and Jar the brc-a-hrT Oh he ei~aii az 80 mir
an hour Happy Is the man who can start up hi
awn winter fires.