, 1889-12-08
BUSINESS.
Several Attempts to Start a Horse while
the Driver Was Looking for n Brick.

Several Attempts to Start a Horse bill
the Driver Was Looking for a Brick.
A bay horse drawing a heavy express
wagon baked on Dearborn street, near
Washington, about noon the other day.
The horse was a vicious looking animal
with a sinister eye, reeking nostrils, and
long, reclining ears, and he baked with
such determination right across the cable
track that the cars were stopped as far
down a. Monroe and La Sale streets, and
the gripmen all swore as gripmen will.
A crowd of young clerks, old business
men and jolly little typewriter girls
gathered on the sidewalk, and all the
office boys in the block took front seats,
after their habit, and awaited develop
ments. The driver, who was a tall, thin
youth with a red neck and freckles, left
his seat, and by way of opening business
kicked the horse rudely in the abdomen.
Amember of the Humane sRiety caught
the boy by the collar and shook him, and
everybody laughed except the boy and
the member of the Humane society, who
glared at eack other.
HAS anybody got a lump of sugar.
the member of the Humane society asked
after a while, the boy having gone to
look for a brick.
II have" a typewriter girl replied,
diving into her handbag.
The member of the Humane society
said, THANK you, miss" bowed, rolled
back his cuffs in the manner of the gen.
tleman who is just about to make a
nickel disappear in his ear. and then at
tempted to thrust the sugar into the
horses mouth. The horses ears tapped
back, his eye Redeemed and he grabbed
at the Humane mans arm with his pink
jaws. The Humane man yelled, "Whoai"
and jumped away; the young men in
the crowdl laughed hoarsely and the girls
shrieked.
Banker George Schneider had been
standing in his window watching the
performance, and he now came down
stairs and walked through the crowd.
"In the old country" he said, 1--WE
used to make balky horses move in this
way" and he got on his tiptoes and
threw his arms around the horses neck.
The animal snorted ~savagely and shot up
its angry head till its neck looked like a
stand pipe, and of course Mr.. Schneider
went with 1t. When he had gone up so
high that he could almost see the roof OF
the Tacoma building he let go, and, fall
ing, struck Tailor Joe Day. Mr.. Day
changes his trousers every hour, and he
now wore a pair of gobelin blue trousers
with white hecks. when he jumped out
of the way to avoid Mr.. Schneider he
rubbed some axle grease off a wagon hub
with his trousers and swore softly. Mr..
Schneider blushed under the taunts of
the crowd and withdrew to the bank.
A red faced man with a sandy mus
tache, who wore n checked scarf around
his neck, then came forward and re-
marked: "'Ere's the honly woye to do
the bloomink think" He took a hitch
ing strap from a horse attached to a
buggy near by and passed it behind the
balky horses right front leg.
Then he began to pull and haul, and
Assistant Postmaster John Hubbard,
who has a good voice, started to sing
Saw my leg Off" E verybody in the
crowd knew "Saw my leg off" and
the chorus was large and enthusiastic.
Officer LAWN paused on his way home
to dinner, saw the unhitched horse, and
calmly drove off with the buggy, accord
ing to the ordinance regularly made and
provided. The owner, a little man with
a plug hat, came out of the Grannis
block at this juncture and assaulted the
Englishman, inc somebody began welt
ing the balky horse with a barrel stave.
This was the signal for a combined at
tack, and everybody who could get near
enough took a hand in hammering the
poor brute. While this bombardment
was at its height the driver came up.
He inquired for the member of the HUI
nan society, and finding that he had
rome he climbed into the wagon, glared
contemptuously at the crowd, kicked the
horse in an ungentlemanly like manner,
yelled "G-ee-t-ee-app," and drove
away.-Chicago Tribune.