Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1889-12-27
MisckllamenMs.
HOW PoDDLEs PROPOSED.

Mr.. Toddles arose one morning In
very melancholy mood. 1t was his forty
fifth birthday, and he was still bache
lor.
"Time is flying" be said "Youti
has gone. ] have nothing to look for
ward to but n miserable single life Mt
boarding house. Why have | neve
married ? 1t is too late now"
"Toddles ! you in ?" cried II voice Al
the door. Il want to consult you"
Come Income in" replied Tod
dies, and the door opened to admit tai
gentleman, with head like the popu
lar portraits of Shakespeare and beart
which he trimmed in the way best oalcu
lated to impress the likeness on all be-
holders.
He wore Il very snowy little smoking
jacket and cap to match, and carried
in his hand roll of manuscript and &
photographic pen He looked what be
was--a literary man. His serials, which
were Of the most romantic sort, were
read with avidity by all the young ladie,
who subscribed for the Weekly Gushe,
of who bought it at the stands or sta.
TONERS stores or borrowed it of their
neigh bors His heroes were never more
than two and twenty resembled, nc.
cording to description, the wax figure
with which hair dressers decorate their
windows; smoked constantly rolled up
their eyes continually; and all pos
sessed silk night gowns and slept on
their handkerchiefs and decorated their
button holes with hot house plants, and
had only to double their fists and shake
them at any other man in order to make
him fall as fiat as the walls of Jericho.
In fact; they were even mixtures of the
Apollo Belvidere and the dandy Of the
time of THE Spectator, with some of the
stuff that goes to the making of the
hero of the modern prize ring How
ever the girls like them and many a
married dame sighed over the romance
and wished that her prosaic John was
more of that pattern.
Good morning, Toddles, old fellow r
said Mr.. Sparkle, genially. Here l
am, coming for advice again Whenever
| want genuine advice come to you.
You have literary taste. It's n con-
founded pity that you are rich. Tod
dles-you'd have made your mark with
your pen else. Well, you'll advise me p
81 shall be delighted, I'm sure" said
Toddles delighted +! But you hatter
me-
"Not at ALL" responded Mr.. Sparkle.
"Breakfcst is not ready yet; I'll just
read this to you, if you don't mind.
I've taken new departure in the serial
I've introduced an old fellow"
''llow old p asked Toddlcs
Thirty" responded Sparkle-"al-
most thirty"
Now, | call that young" said Tod
dies.
"Of course it is, in real life," said
Sparkle Forty is young, to all in
tents and purposes. But literary age
is very different. 1t would blast nn
authors reputation to make heroine
out of her teens or hero out Of his
twcnties This thirty-year-old is an
old bachelor who has long adored a
certain lady, and remains unmarried for
her sake She is going down into the
vale of years-fve and twenty of 'em "a
spinster for love of him Neither guesses
the love of the otber--good int, ell p
Very" said Toddles.
Now, the question u.s." said Sparkle
"whether to unite them or TO have her
confess her love for him beside his death
bed"
THE latter p cried Toddles, enthusi.
astically. "But have him recover after
all and then marry EN-"
Sparkle started up and graspcd Tod.
dies hand.
Magnificent" he said. "You al
ways have original IDEAS"
He sat down at Toddles' desk and be-
gan to lance his photographic pen ints
the air in a furious manner highly sug.
gestive of delirium tremens. However
Toddles was not alarmed he knew tina
he was only getting his pen into work
ing order.
"Ah !" he said, as drop Of ink ap
peared at the point of the instrument
"here we are at last !" He jotted dowr
a memorandum, and then wheeled about
"Let me read you this" he said /; :"
think you will like it. My hero is solil
oquizing-imagining that he is declar
ing his love-ahem J" and Mr.. Spark
pushed his smoking cap to the back Q
his head. smoothed his Shakespearcar
beard with his hand and began
Beloved ope-Nay, start not lon
have | called thee SO in my soul"