Waco evening news. (Waco, Tex.) 1888-1889, 1889-02-05

flcklEeY's DIZZY EVENING At A
FIVE DOLLAR BANQUET.

He Had In and Was Going to Get the
worth Of Ills Money Everything Wen,
Beautifully Until That Horrid Cigar Go,
In It's Wicked Work.
ut was my last cigar" said Mr.,
Fickleby, and, carried away by the food
Of sad memories, he leaned his head upon
his hand and wept. "You see," said he
"the fellows In our set determined tc
have O banquet, and we've been saving
up since the last Fourth of July. Il was
to be Ave dollar affair, and Tor a week
beforehand lived on husks and abiurcd
pie. was determined to eat, drink and
be merry. and forced myself into vast
capacity.
hours to dress, but It was worth while,
and when looked on myself at o'clock
beheld glass of fashion and mold OF
form. There rust have been fifty or
sixty Of the fellows at the banquet. Be.
sides our set there were large number
Of invited guests. It was about 10 o'clock
when we sat down, and was so ema.
ciated from continued and rigorous fast.
Ing that ! could hardly hold myself
straight.
THAT FLYER sPURRED HIM ON.
II rarely touch wine, but when pay
p for single meal, when at my board.
Ing house can get twenty-one for the
same money, I stop Mt nothing. So l
sherry glass as often as l emptied It,
while oysters, bouillon, salmon, sweet
breads and lamb chops vanished behind
my waistcoat. Nor did l permit the
claret to flow past me, but slipped It
while discussed q tender bit OF beef
with asparagus. have heard much Of
thoseductive and insidious influences of
punch, but l must say that the punch
we fellows had at the banquet seemed to
me more like lemon ice cream soda
water than the fiery unframed spirit of
the alcoholic flask.
Cigarettes came with tho punch,
may as well confess that am not an in
veterate smoker. In fact, two or three
cigarettes year generally is sufficient to
allay any cravings have for tho noxious
weed. But on an occasion like a five
dollar banquet am possessed to indulge
in the most reckless dissipation. and after
the punch made away with two cigar
cites. Partridge and sip or two of
claret followed. ! dealt literally, as is
my wont, with the ice cream and the
cakes, the coffee and the fruits, and when
the toasting began, and the champagne
was poured out, began to feel glorious.
1.-THE speeches were capital. Some of
the most learned and witty men l ever
heard answered to the several toasts.
Every man around me was smoking.
summoned waiter and babe him bring
me cigar. 1t was just glorious Through
the blue wy~aths of smoke / could Just
see the orator fiinging out his arms over
the china and silver. slipped the spark.
ling wine. Everything was happy.
sat and laughed and let my head roll
where 1t would.
1.-THE cigar finished l sat back finger
ing my wine glass as listened to the
speakers about me. Suddenly l felt
something like dark, damp green mold
fuse perspiration. A vague feeling that
l was full of protoplasms possessed me.
A strange power seemed trying to raise
my lungs into my throat. The speech lost
its brilliancy. shaded my eyes with nv
hand and gazed earnestly at the table
CLOTH The plates began to move about
strangely. Through the cloud of smoke
about my head came the sound Of clap
ping hands. Who had been speaking l
neither knew nor cared. There was
wild, turbulent feeling Of rebellion in the
region of my diaphragm.
HES UNDER THE TABLE"
Somebody rose and began to speak.
dared not raise my eyes to see him.
The plates swan round and round. How
the damp perspiration gathered on my
foreheadl could endure the suspense
no longer. ! felt that something was
about to happen. Without q moments
hesitation slipped under the groaning
board and began myself to groan in
unison with it. It may be said that the
cause OF our grooming was identical-a
heavy load, If tobacco smoke can be
called load. l languidly raised nv
eyelids and looked around. saw q
forest Of legs belonging to the leading
preachers, doctors and lawyers in town,
o vast forest Of legs. heard more hand
ciapping. The legs began to dance, the
table rocked, chasm opened some.
where. Somebody cried, He's under
the tablet! Then there was laughter.
"All at once went to pieces. re-
member nothing save confused ap-
pearance OF black faces, and wondered
Y ! was with Stanley; They hauled me
along. l tried to think whether l was
Emin Bey or Gerard Fickleby. II was
the former knew Stanley would rescue
sAaSs ~ W ~ VIC tuttcI l kueW tO8t j
was not feeling well. Iasked the colored
person who was supporting me, and
whom believed to be the king Of Sene-
gambia. II we were anywhere near the
Congo river. He said something about
Genesee, and l believe argued the point
with him, though am not sure know
looked at the floor just second, and
when ] raised my eyes the stars were
shining over my head and the ther.
mometcr was below zero.
ut seemed to me that the common re-
ports OF African torridness were all
wrong. ] looked about for a chair, but
could find mono, and was forced to sit
down on the sidewalk. A policeman,
believe 1t was, came along and tried to
carry on social conversation with me.
He was an ignorant man, however, and
failed to follow my train Of thought, and
l told him what ] thought of him. re-
member nothing more until found N.Y.
self in bed with large wet cloth on my
head. No, am firmly resolved never to