Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-04-01
MUSIC AT THE BAR.
Horror Lest Judge White Hears Of a
Saloon Song-Fun for Drummers.

Horror Lest Judge White Hears OF
Saloon song-Fun for Drummers.
The serio-comic bearing of events sup
posed to affect the granting or refusal OF
licenses to applicants, has hardly had better
illustration than was afforded by two witty
travelling men from out-of-town last week.
Applicants from Allegheny were to be
called before Judge White the next day.
Everybody anticipated a severity more
striking by far than was actually panned
out The remarks Of Judges White and
Ewing last year, concerning the marvel
GUS development of single or double
room hotels on the Southside; the
scorching sarcasm administered to every
saloon keeper who based his claim as land
lord of both hotel and restaurant upon the
fact that patron at his bar could, for a
nickel, get not only glass of beer, but
toothpick or nibble at little crust of bread
with mustard on it-these and other mem
ories of admonitions had caused the Allie
gheny applicants to tremble in their boots
Everybody appreciated the real delicacy
of the situation, and the two travellers
alluded to were none too slow to catch on.
y
stead, proposed this plan to his fellow:
Music, they say, hath charms to soothe
the savage breast. Let's try it on some of
these anxious ones, or at least offer them the
chance to try it. Let's see if they II con-
sent to have us sing them into the sew
enth heaven of that hope that springs eter-
nal in the heart of every man who doesn't
want a license"
The plan of campaign was none too
clearly defined at the outset, either in this
prospectus or in the mind of the pros
pector; but that it was susceptible OF devel-
opment was clearly proven in the subse-
quent proceedings.
The plotting pair started in to "do up"
Federal street and the Allegheny Diamond,
so far as saloon men were concerned. Drop
ping into one place away up Federal, the
jolly gentlemen ordered drinks, and then
another round for the hangers-on. Then
one of the two, assuming the air of man
halfseas-over. placed an index finger along
one side of his nose, looked really earnest,
and Ito the barkeeper) said:
''This is right jolly group of fellows; 1
wonder how a good song would suit them"
[clearing his throat as if by way of prepara-
ton.
mo, no, mol Oh, for heavens sake,
NOh ANO AnuoAN ACAOJ PAOoSO' -ANI - NeSAA
it low dance house, if you do; they'll say
we countenanced breaches of the peace;
they'll swear its a variety show, and not a
restaurant we run; and Judge White'll-
well, you know Allegheny is to be called in
the License Court tomorrow
Such was the expostulation of the bar
tender, who, with both hands up, and an
anxious, imploring look, pleaded for a
withdrawal of the musical proposition.
This formula was repeated, with varia-
tions, at every saloon on Federal street, and
some of the Mortified protests were amusing
in the extreme. At the last place visited
the barkeeper's retort to the suggestion of
"a song" was
"Sing? Not Fl know it ! Look ERE, gen.
tlemen, 1 was oncet a member of the Saliva
tion Army; with lungs to qualerfy me, too.
1 sang. did; and was arrested, was;
and it was good religious singing, too.
Look ere, gen 'lemen, 'fyou should sing in
.'ere wilst Judge W'ite's 'oldin' court,
couldn't answer for the conserkences-no,
sireel Ye can't sing. Dye hear me? Ye
can't sing in ERE, 'thout you do it over my
dead corpus. We want license, we do; an
singin' don't 90 P'