Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1889-10-16
A MODERN MIRACLE.
What Rip Van Wrinkle Really Found When
He Woke From His Sleep.

IdNlu0 JUST UdCh VI tIl0 Ulg OdLSklll
Hotel, and found that his beard had
grown three or four feet, and his gun
fell apart when he touched it, he ut
tered no exclamation of surprise, but
started peacefully off in quest of cock
tail.
WELL" he remarked, as he lifted his
beard in order to cross a small stream,
this air is even more bracing than the
advertisements led me to believe, and
as for that cheap parlor rifle it's won
der there's anything left of it at all. .
The guests on the long piazza stared
at him as if he we're a wild beast, and
he looked vainly among them for the
familiar faces of his friends of the day
before.
II see they've all gone," he MUIR
INJURED, land to tell the truth I'm not
surprised. I can't see how any man
short of Crpsus can afford to stop
more than q minute in this house.
Why, even in the bowling alley where
we played last night they charged us so
| much for every game and each round of
drinks that / haven't got more than a
quarter left in my pockets. Well, l can
get cocktail with it, anyhow"
"Where's old Lie Simonds?" asked
Rip, as he leaned against the bar and
watched the cocktail Undertaking. I'M
der the deft touches of the drink-Inixer.
Don't know him." was the reply.
"Do you know if Billy Avery's
about ?" asked Rip, after moments
reflection.
"Bill Avery !" exclaimed one of the
guests. why, he's been dead these ten
years.
Dead Why, we were playing in the
bowling alley only last night" gasped
Rip, rubbing his eyes like one in
dream. Don't anyone know me around
here ?''
No. nobody knew him, and the poor
old man stood staring about him in DIS
may and confusion. A copy of
New York paper was lying on the bar.
He picked it mp and glanced at the
headlines.
"By Jove !" cried one of the guests,
"I'lll tell you who it is. It's Rip Van
Wrinkle come back after his twenty
years Sleep"
THAT'S my name," cried the old man
eagerly; 'but I've only been asleep one
night"
A shout of laughter, tempered by
brought half dozen more of the guests
into the bar-room to see what the mat
ter was.
"Just look at that paper there and
see how far behind you are in the
news" said one of the merrymakers.
mot SO very far behind, / reckon"
he 1etorted, as he read aloud: The
site committee of the Worlds Fair held
a meeting in the Times Building to de-
eide upon site for the great exposi-
ton. A memorial from the property
owners of Hohokus was read and an in
vitation to visit that historic town and
nor foE DO Of frno Inn fod hxz
unanimous vote
'Therep exclaimed old Rip, trium-
phantly, "that'sjust what they've been
doing for the last two months. I guess
I'm not more than day behind.
What's this next article? Skipped
with Hired Man. hey? Well, that's
about what you might expect"
Turn over the page and you'll find
something new" said one of his new
acquaintance.
''All right" said Rip, confidently.
Nov We'll see. Josiah Elderberry, of
Beanville, Conn.,, came to New York
few days ago in reply to letter he had
received Offering him 81 100 in counter
Depot, yesterday, he opened his bag to
get bill with which to pay for his
ticket and discovered that a package of
sawdust had been substituted for the
counterfeit money. He made a COM
plant to the police, and was sent to the
house of detention as witness against
Sawdust Pete, who swindled him, and
who was released under bail. Mr.. FL
derberry is trustee of the Beanville
Church, and is said to have used some
of the church funds to buy the counter
feits with
ST guess that fellows been asleep
twenty years instead of me-" said Rip,
briskly, as he finished the paragraph.
as easy as you think. What's this !?
Sucked in at Niagara; the Awful Fate
of Stranger from the Country Why,
that's just what happened to me when
[ was there, week ago, and it's what
happens to everybody those fellers can
lay their hands on. You can bet it's an
awful fate when one of those hack
drivers or photographers gets hold of
you. I guess the worlds been moving
pretty slow if it hain't got ahead any
more than that in twenty years."
But I tell you it's fact chimed in
another OF the company. There was
man named Rip Van Wrinkle WHO dis.
appeared from here just twenty years
comes the landlord; he'll tell you the
same thing. Just ask him."
Landlord" said the old man, "these
gentlemen say that disappeared from
here twenty years ago and have been
asleep down in the ravine ever since.
Now, my recollection is that came up
here last night with basket of sassa-
fras to sell at this very hotel to make
into tea Tor the boarders, and 1 want to
know whether Pm right Or whether
they are ?''
1--WE don't make our tea ont of sassa-
fras," retorted the landlord, "and there
was man of your name who disap-
peared from here about 20 years ago
in 1859 think it was. guess you must
be the man."
Rip Van Wrinkle communed with him
self for few moments, and then MUIR
INJURED softly: 'sI'll try him once MORE"
"Landlord,' he said, putting his hand
in his trousers pocket. ''I've been
sleeping out in your ravine for the past
twenty years. How much do I owe
you?"
Nothing" replied the boniface.
"What you let man sleep twenty