The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1889-11-29
HIRED. OH SO TIRED.

I am tired of civilization and all the so
called improvements of modern science. I
am tired of sewer connections, steam heat,
furnaces and double windows. am tired
Of people who believe in all the gospels
but the gospel Of fresh air, and
who count the first and only aim Of mortal
existence to be-to keep warmi | am tired
Of the evolution of the ''hired girl"
and the embarrassments consequent upon
meeting her on the new footing. I am
tired of having to wear twenty pounds of
clothing when one would suffice. ! am tired
Of trying to compromise ON dress reform,
and the consequent scorn Of the low minded.
| am tired of paying for dead horses, and
Of being cheated in special bargains. am
tired Of encountering the mereiless woman
with a dead bird on her bonnet, and the
ldiotio woman chewing gum. l am tired
OF the cat which lies in wait for the spring
robin, and of the good little Sunday school
boy who is also lying low with his sling
shot.
am tired of eultiyating people in whom
| take far less interest than / do in carrots
and eabbages. [ am tired of excessively
candid people whose frankness is the out
come of beerishness and il~l-breeding. /
am tired of being told that money
does not bring happiness, when | know
that the statement is a fallacy and long to
prove it. | am tired of dudes, ye gods,
how tired / am of them, and Of the cackling
voices of loud mouthed people everywhere.
| am tired of looking through crowds for
faces totake on trust. | am tired oflaw max
ers who cannot tell the distinction between
freedom and license, between the American
eagle and the low flying foreign huzzard.
| am tired of the devil turned monk. and
people who steal .'the livery Of heaven to
serve the devil in I am tired of men
who mistake this great breezy globe Of
sunshine, as it spins through snow dazzle
and summer blossom, for a euspidor and
live in it but to defile it. | am tired of a
law that does not justify homiside in the
case ofthe hanson cab driver and the brute
who carries a black snake whip to torture
bis horses with. I am tired of the patient
despair written in tie faces of lost dogs and
in tie eyes of horses slowly suffocating in
nose bags. / am tired Of hearing people
blame Providence for the loss of friend or
child when violated laws of hygiene killed
him and Providence had naught to do with
it. | am tired Of ear muffs, and of awaiting
the day when the mills of the gods shall
grind their wearers into fine dust. | am tired
of egofistical people who see no particular
merit in even the plan Of redemption be-
cause they were not consulted in regard to
it. I am tired of doing things because the
rest of the world do them, and of being
considered a crank if I preserve enough
individuality to refuse to be a eouformist.
| am tired Of being labeled with the great
alike" like charity bibs at fair.
| am tired of all the impositions put up
on me because | am a woman. I am tired
of waiting for the day when l can have an
equal chance with the men. and can be d
gentle hammered politician, a coroner or a
noble county commissioner with ssthe rest
Of the boys l am tired of folks after
they get too old to turn a coffee mill expect
ing to stay at the ships helm and guide
her through the breakers. l am tired of
last years flower pods in this summers
garden, and Of all two legged donkeys. l
am tired Of expanding sympathy upon
book agents, eripples, hurdy gurdy grind
ers, and tramps. am tired of the brake
man who night after night and year after
year cries Livingston; on the suburban
train. I am tired Of the mother who al
lows her boy to be a little rowdy because
it is a boys way" when he might be a
Little Lord Fauntleroy with proper train
ing. | am tired Of seeing children sent to
parents as reeklessly as though one should
send pearls to swine or garlands of sum-
mer flowers to Bedlamites. I am tired Of
people who never mean what they say or
say what they mean. | am tired of wait
for death to prove how good a fellow a
man was, or how noble a saint and martyr
a woman has been. I am tired of hearing
that our girls cannot go about without
chaperons, when the fashion is only a toad
yism borrowed from European society. /
am tired of being asked to believe that a
sweet and true American girl may not be
trusted the world over without a keeper. |
I'm tired Of people who make long prayers
while their fingers are twisted in the collar
of an employe or a debtor, aud of men who
talk about Heaven when they are unfit TO
live in the best circles OF Hades. l am tired
of injustice that gives the golden cup to
the pretender, sud places the crown upon
The impostor's head. I am tired of extor-
ton and unaileyiated wre~tchedness. am
tired eftearing through life kindliDg flames
thai do not pay Tor the matches and candles
used. | am tired Of tear shedding and
the great. voiceless su%ppiication of dumb
brutes and little innocent children in pain.
| am tired Of trying TO keep cool and calm
in storms that constantly send brave ships
onto the rocks. | am tired of big troubles
and of little facts, Of roaring lions and little
foxes. am tired oflots OF things besides.
with no time to enumerate them.-Am5ef
IN Chicago Tribune.
One OF MANY Testimonials