Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1889-05-23
MIS- GE;g::I::E s GOES.
Love anGdouse- Cleaning.

""i4Ctsr VINO HrSG jWeHted
house-clea1Ihg9" groaned ~, Mer-
rion, Whoever he was, Jhope he
died in ajiunatic asylum! Slippers
IN the <yeau drawer, in&sny best
esqfrrT7 LstaHG "ndc- Ne bed;
dressing-gowa nobody: linowf where;
chairs all tied up in Holland wrap
pings, and nothing to sit ON but the
cop of hat-bOX! And, worse than
ali, carnc!s ruthlcsaly wrenched up
aud floor all dclugcd with damp
Soap-suds, enough to give a man
rheumatism and neuralgia for the
remaining term Of his natural life!
Job might have had great many
trials to test his patience haven't
any doubt OF tlat-but there was
one trial he didn't have. | never
read in Scripture that jobs wife
cleaned house. That's modern
arrravatiou. I mean to marry 4
nice girl, and and make it 4 StiPula-
ton beforehand that VIC won't turn
our house upside down, on princl-
pie, twice year"
Mr.. Merrion soliloquizcd thus, as
he stood before the mirror, smooth
ing his brown, curly locks with his
fingers, in lieu of the halr-brush,
which no amount OF search proved
available in finding,
Not 81 bad looking after all, in
spite of his scvcn-and-thirty years,
he could not but tell himself rs he
stood there. Dark brown hair,
waved ut the ends, bright hazel
eyes, clear complexion, albeit
somewhat touched with brown; and
square chin, cleft with 4 deep
dimplc in the centre. An old bache-
Tor, but rs yet not irrcmediably so.
While there is life there is hope,
and the aggravated torments OF life
in 4 clearinghouse were slowly but
surely driving him toward his des-
tiny.
Old Mrs. Griushaw. the land
lady, was ut the head Of the vesper
banuueting table pouring out dc
eUction of weak tea into an array Of
Clipped stone china-cups, as Mr..
IIerriou entered. She greeted him
with 4 happy smile.
"Of course, Mr.. Merrion, you're
quite delighted to see how finely we
have got along cleaning your ROOM"
80, lna'am. I'm not !'j,-car hero
made answer gruilly. - I, regard
house-cleaning as an invention of the
Evil One, and I don't care who
knows it."
The assembled gentlemen of the
establishment murmured unanimous
consent: the assembled ladies rolled
up their eyes and wagged their tea
spoons in pious horror.
"Dear me! sighed the landlady,
how peculiar men are! My dear,
departed Grimshaw never breathed
a word Of objection to spring clean
ing; in fact, he used to help me at
whitewashing, and papered the walls
with his own hands ~
"And he died, didn't he, ma'am?"
Intercepted Merton.
Eyes, he died." said Mrs. Grim
shaw, shut it was govt in the stom-
ach, and at the age of fifty-twoW
"Ah ~ said Mr.. Merton, sepul-
churally. "And there is no saying
how much longer he might have
lived, if it hadn't been for spring
cleaning"
Nothing Of the kind !" cried
| Mrs. Grimshaw Indignantly, and
she began Il detailed account Of the
symptoms and signs which had &C
companied the last days Of the de
ceased Grimshaw, to the ladies i'm
mediately around her, under cover
Of which Mr.. Merton swallowed
his tea and effected his escape.
GA man must be made Of cast
iron to endure this sort of thing
much longer" said he to himself,
strolling out into the May air. 81
won't continue a solitary-alone in
the worlds great procession any
longer. Pill become g married
man."