The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1889-04-04
NOT so PROSPEROUS, AFTER ALL.
Engaged on the SpOt-A Friendly Caution
Their Mother-Mr. Vanderbilt Got In
A Smart Boy.

'You must prepare yourself for disappoint-
ments."
''Oh, mustl How kind of you to give me
warning! Mrs Bowser, l don't want to
seem vain or egotistical, but I'll invite thirty
six people here on that night, and for every
one who fails to come I'll give you $50 bill. +"
''You are kind-very kind. 1 hope the
party will be a great success. You can begin
at once"
When he came home next night he had a
list of eighteen couples who had been invited
and solemnly promised to come.
''Voted too much trouble-can't get people
enoughr' sneered Mr.. Bowser, as he looked
over the list Its in the management, Mrs.
Bowser-all in the management"
For three days he walked around on tip toe
and took every occasion to brag over me.
Then came the first set back. We were at
dinner when the telephone rang and Mr..
Bowser was asked for.
'Hellol Bowserl"
'sYes.n
''This is Hilbert"
eyes"
81 wanted to tell you that we can't come
down to the party"
"You can't!"
''No. My wife has just remembered that
she agreed to go over to Johnson's on that
night Sorry, old fellow, but hope"-
Mr.. Bowser shut him off with a loud bang
and turned to me and said:
MRS Bowser, don't you never darken Fill
bert's doors again-never! They are liars
and dangerous people. can fill their places
in five minutes"
Before he got out Of the house there was
ANOTHER ring.
''Hellol Bowser!"
''Yesn
"This is Watkins"
eyes"
''When told you the other day we'd be
Eva was to have childs party on the same
evening. That knocks us out.n
''And you can't comeln
''Of course not. Sorry to diSappoint you,
old fellow, but of course'-
Watkins is liar, Mrs. Bowser-a first
class, bold faced liarI' exclaimed Mr.. Bowser,
dead as a door NALL"
He went off saying he could get two million
couples to take their places, and he returned
at evening just as the following note came by
the hands OF a messenger boy:
pliments, and regret that the death of an
uncle in China will prevent them from being
present on Wednesday evening"
Mr.. Bowser had begun to turn white when
the telephone rang.
Hello! Bowser!"
.At'Yes"
Say, old man, this is a world Of change,
you know. When told you we'd come down
,--s-
ter. She's to be married that same evening.
Tra-la, old boy, hope you'll have q good
time"
81 told you it would be hard work to get so
many people out, >" I remarked.
did you, Mrs. Bowserl How kind of you!
But I'll show you and these liars and de-
ceivers a thing or two before get through"
There were no more declinations until
Wednesday morning. Then Mr.. Bowser was
called up by telephone.
THAT you, Bowserp
yes"
SIS it tonight you have that Party?'
YES"
'Pshawl thought it was a week from to-
night! Well, that knocks US out. We've got
to go to the Y. NJ. c. a. Sorry, you know,
but this is a previous engagement
Mr.. Bowser was jumping up and down
when there came another ring:
Hello! Bowser!n
''Yesn
Mice weather"
eyes"
'sAll well down there!"
YES"
''Say, Bowser, my wife made a previous
engagement for tonight. We've got to go
to"-
Mr.. Bowser shut him off with bang and
Aytarted for the office. During the forenoon
Took in two more destinations, and while he
was at dinner there was ring and the old
familiar hail:
Hello! Bowserw
Eyes"
''Say, BOwser"
Eyes"
eve expect to be down early tonight"
''Glad Of it."
''But it may be that my mother-in-law will
come in on the $50 train. If she does we
can't come"
Mr.. Bowser seemed dazed as he hung up the
trumpet and left the house. The last blow
came at z in the evening. The telephone rang
and he crawled over to answer.
SIS this Bowser'si'
s'Yesn
ssWhere's the old man"
II am Mr. Bowser."
"Oh! so you are. Your voice seems mighty
weak tonight. Say, old man, the three
couples of us in this terrace were coming
down tonight, but we must disappoint you at
this late moment. We have had free tickets
sent up for the opera, and of course''-
MIR. Bowser walked to the front door,
locked it, muffied the bell and turned out the
gas. Then he sat down and was very quiet
for a couple of hours. At last he looked up
and said:
s'AIrs. Bowser, some husbands would muir
der a wife for this'
\ ''But what have doneg'
s'What have you done! Coaxed, bribed
and bulldozed me into giving a progressive
euchre party, and where's the partyl I told
you how it would come out, and here we
are! Mrs. Bowser, LIP
But he was too full for further utterance
and went to bed.-Detroit Free Press.
Engaged on the Spot.
Dry Goods Merchant-You have called in
..a.-e-.o 20 our advertisement nc q floor