Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-06
PITHY PARAGRAPHS.
Incidents and Ideas of the Lightweight
Glass Intermingled.


AN epidemic of fires.
WIT may be brevity, but brevity is not always
wit
Hite.
AN increasing tide of money is turning Ex.
posit1onward.
CABLE cars are actually stopping for passeh.
gers nowadays.
ST. AUGUSTINE school children gave pretty
musical entertainments
THE cheerful mortuary report says there
were 81 deaths last week.
LAST night the County Democracy ap-
pointed committee to secure larger hall.
Miss JENNIE HARDnHAN, aged Is, is wanted
by her anxious papa. She has been missing for
week.
Two hundred couples made merry the
masquerade ball of the Birmingham Turner'S
last night.
A PIECE of metal fell upon James Wilkinson
at the Republic Iron Works, yesterday, crush
ing his foot.
A AFLY1NG patrol encountered brindle pup
and on account of the wagon there will be no
more waggin'.
HON. A. w. SMILEY, of Harrisburg. is in
town. This is significant. Hon. Chas. Robin
son is here also.
JAMES CEILING was unfortunate enough to
have a foot crushed yesterday in Thirty
third street mill.
THE hatrack of John Cochran's home, IS
Clark street, was relieved OF an oVercoat ana
hat yesterday by thieves.
A TIME to beware of the ides of March has
passed, and ordinary mortals will do well to be-
ware of the winds of March.
THOMAS H WATT, one of the most popular
ticket sellers at the Union station, has been ap-
pointed station agent at Johnstown, Pa.
SARAH ScHAEFER wasselected from among
nine candidates, last night to be a teacher in
the Bedford school, Twenty-ninth ward.
No, Maudie. Don't ask gentleman into the
house upon his first call. He may refuse.
Knock him down with a club and drag him in.
THE mesmerized girl will have hearing
Saturday charged with surety of the peace,
when, in all probability, she will be the para
lyzed girl.
On one day 1O7, and on another 81 Belgians
and Swedes announced their intention to be-
come citizens. No wonder the eagle screams
occasionally.
JB. CoRRY, of Braddock, proposes to make
it warm for some people in that borough by
having the court supervise the returns CORY
proposes, etc
NINETEEN more lots have been sold on the
site Of the old Allegheny City Poor Farm, and
the sale was approved yesterday by the Poor
Farm Committee.
CoMERFoRD will have hearing tonight
charged with stealing calfskins He might
have gone the whole COW. As well be hanged
for a sheep as lamb.
CHIEF BROWN DEGREES that hereafter lock-
up prisoners must not be released on bail en-
tered before Aldermen. Such bail must be
entered before police magistrate.
Mr.. FREEBoRN, acquitted of tearing down
a neighbor's pigpen. not only indicated his
name, but received the courts Endorsement of
himself as an individual Board of Health.
A FIERCE one-round battle occurred be-
tween two hill dudes. One tainted, and the
other tainted. Cholly had struck Hawy in a
vital part, and broken his package of cigaw-
cites.
THE pewsies won't have to twist it into
Fuller count o. the lagerations" any longer.
It's a chestnut now, anyhow, and they'll be
privileged to yell their sales in words OF two
syllahles.
THREE carloads of colonists passed through
the city last night on their way to Western
homes. They came from the vicinity of the
Cumberland Valley and were bound for points
in the Northwest
THE following telegram received by gentle
man of one of the prominent political clubs
sounds more significant than was intended:
Received by the President at O'Clock; arrive
home at tomorrow"
IT is announced that the Harrison and Nor
ton Cowboy Inaugurating Club will this morn
ing stop over in Pittsburg on their rain of
terror in Washington. Allassoi has it come to
this, politically speaking?
AT last nights meeting of the British Amer.
ican Association in LawrenceviIle the member
ship was increased to 200. The duty Of men,
bers in taking out naturalization papers was
the theme of the speeches.
WILLIAM FRASER signed the pledge and,
his wife alleges Immediately loaded up and
smashed in the door with an ak and put her
and the children out of the house He will be
requested to explain on Tuesday.
"CARNEGIE's ticker on high, /" they will prob
ably call it; for work has been resumed on the
Carnegie Library clock tower in Allegheny,
and as plans for the clock have been approved,
Alleghenians will soon have handsome public
timepiece.
THE number ID was fatal to that many East
End boys yesterday. They were arrested for
stealing Is boxes of cigars from Richard Ray
They are probably as sick as if they had
smoked the cigars.
SCENE: A Pleasant Valley street car last
evening. First passenger-"Going to the Junta
Club to hear that lecture and learn about
Alaska this EVENING"? Second passenger, with
a non-imported shudder-"Naw, don't have
TO; these cars'n do"
THE police arrested James Brown, John Wal
lace and John Smith last night while intoxi-
Gated They went into the rooms formerly oc-
cupied by the Allegheny Tariff Club, on Ohio
street, near West Diamond street. They CON-
menced to break the windows and tear up
things generally.
THE Holiday Literary Society of colored
people celebrated iTs formation by lively de-
bate on "Does Columbus deserve more credit
for discovering America than George Wash
ington for defending lt?' At last account
Columbus was lap ahead with George a warm
second, pushed by his numerous namesakes.