The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1889-07-24


learned in all the languages Of hell
The most horrid oaths and inferna
curses load and taint the air about
him, and this language passes current
us the graces of conversation, as :
polish of style that shonld suffice tt
class him a fine gentleman. Benevo
lence to ollr fellow men was perhap!
never less cultivated in any country
than of late among u.s.. Hard hearted
Indifference to the poor, the widow
and the orphan, has risen up among U:
and seized her throne. Pride ant
false honor have disgraced our armie:
with the barbarous practice of duel
ling; and friends have imbrued thei
hands in the blood of friends. Ava
rice stalks the streets, or turks in thu
corners, and has stained the public
roads with inhuman murders. FRAUD
and oppession sweep all before them
while debauchery and vice fill boil
town and country; private robbery
thefts, and burglaries abound more anc
more. Intemperance, also has become
sadly common among the men, and
this monster, not content with hu-
man sacrifices among the men, ant
with making shipwreck of many
professors of religion, too, has begun
to ravage and destroy even the gentlel
sex. 1t is well known that this peri
cd never had it's parallel in Americi
for the prevalence of all the vices o.
sensuality. Adulteries are excused
under the name of gallantries."
The reader will notice that intemper
ance is spoken of as one of the vices
resulting from the war. The late DR.
Beckwith says ''It is well known thai
the war of our Revolution was the
starting point, the great fountain o.
our national intemperance."
HOW to be Happy Though Married
This is a1hackneyed subject, I grant
you, but not more hackneyed, l am
sure you will allow, than the unhappi
hess Of homes. We are told that
"God setteth the solitary in families, .
but surely when we look around
among our friends and acquaintance
we see many marriages that can not be
heavens making. 1t takes good dea
of that charity or love that "seeketE
not her own" to insure happiness in
any state, and especially in the mar
ried state.
"My children" said white-hairec
father, as lie bade good-by to his new
unmarried daughter and her husband
"you will be happy just SO long as you
each seek the happiness of the othel
instead of your own" There yor
have the whole secret in q nutshell
"But," asks sadfaced wife, "suppose
you have always tried to make youl
husband happy, without having YOU
efforts recognized OF appreciated :"
Then, 1 fear, you can only find youl
own happiness in the consciousness O
having done your duty; and, believe
me, it will be q greater and higher
happiness than you can find by neg
lecting it for vain search after youl
own pleasure. Seeking the happines:
of a husband or wife does not always
mean that you must bear injustice ano
ilI-treatment in silence. Selfishness
and it's twin brother thoughtlessnes:
are two of the greatest evils that mar
ried people have to contend with. /
YOU find them to be the besetting sin:
of your husband, and that you can no
shame him out of them by your gener
GUS conduct, see if his past training
has not had something to do with 1T
don't let it run on; you Will nave
more influence to correct it during
your honeymoon than you will later
Perhaps he has been the only son of 6
doting and umwise mother. l once
knew of such Il case, where gentle
man of noble and generous impulses
had had his home-life so narrowed by
his early training that when he mar.
ried he allowed his wife to fall into the
same state Of servitude that his moth.
er had held before her. TO my mino
she was rather the more to be blamed
of the two, only-poor Woman-she
erred in kindness and ignorance. Fif
teen years of this servitude opened hel
eyes to the fact that she had been
wrong, but it was too late then to re-
pair the wrong. All unconsciously he
had grown to feel q contempt for the
woman who could so lavishly yield to
his slightest and most unreasonable
whim.
A young friend of mine without a
single penny by way of a marriage
portion welded gentleman OF means
somewhat older than herself. There
was Il true foundation of love and re-
spect, but the husband, having been
taught to believe that all women were
extravagant and not to be trusted IN
money matters, made his wife no al
lowance, and eXacted from her an ac-
count of all she spent. Being wo-
man of high and generous i'm,
pulses, she could not brook this, ana
while yet OH their honeymoon one day
called him to her side and asked him
to make her Il regular allowance. u
want Il certain sum of money that l
can call my own," said this intrepid
wife. at need not bc large, but II 1t IS
only five dollars u month [ want 1t TO
be my very own, and l wish never to
feel obliged to give you az account OF
it.u Like wise man as he was, he
succumbed to the inevitable, made her
Il handsome allowance, and thus one
of the worst perils of matrjm0ny was
avoided. When I commended my
friend for her courage, she said: All
my life I had seen my mother suffer
from this same trait in my father. A
man of great generosity outside of his
family, he never allowed my mother Il
dollar of pocket money, and when pre-
fectly reasonable bills were presented
to him for payment, there was always
q scene. Had mamma taken firm
stand i'm the early days Of her married
life, we should have been. i much hap
pier family"
DON'T condemn your husband as UNI
generous until you have presented
your reasonable requirements in the
most tactful way and failed. If you
do fail, in this or other matters, a.s !
said before, resolve, God helping you,
. nnl tn SD trn n