San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1889-06-19
FROM THE OTHER SIDE,
A LECTURE FOR HUSBANDS ON
HOME DUTIES, BY A WOMAN.

One can seldom pick up paper of miscel-
laneous reading without coming across ad-
vice to wives to spend the major part of their
existence in striving to retain their husbands
love and admiration. Unquestionably this is
right, and no good wife with good husband
but will find it her supreme delight, as well
as duty, to daily strengthen the sweet cords
that bind them together. But there are other
sides to the question-shadowy, gloomy sides
and it is toward those wives who are. con-
signed to dwell perennially in the gray, SOM
Der lives their lords and masters make for
them that am impelled to say my say.
"Meet him at the door with a smile and
kiss"-that is an old, beautiful and sensible
piece of advice that every wife in this coun-
try ought to be encouraged and able to carry
out from the very depths Of her heart; but,
alas that only the husbands who are in the
minority deserve.
WHISPERING IN THE HUSBANDS EARS.
Suppose-and / call upon hundreds, aye,
thousands, of wives in our midst to witness if
do not draw picture they recognize all toe
readily-the wife has been up and down all
night with the croupy baby, while its father
lay comfortably asleep. Well, take this wife,
who, after the nights anxiety, loss of rest and
fatigue, has to get up and prepare breakfast,
attend to all her usual duties with splitting
headache, caused by sleepnessness and conse-
quent irritability of the stomach, that utterly
loathes the idea of even toast and coffee,
while her handsome, well dressed, well
fed husband goes off for the day with
"Well, I'm off; take care of yourself!' Think
you, she will feel much like meeting him with
a bright, cheerful, sunny smile and kiss
when he comes in, perhaps half hour later
than usual with his greeting: Haven't you
had dinner YETI What did you wait for me
fora You know detest having you wait"
l wish l could get the ear of the general
masculine public for just a little while and
whisper into it that perhaps it would bee quite
as well if the husbands took little more
pains to retain their wives respect and affec-
ton. According to the inevitable law of
nature a woman cannot be happy unless
somebody loves her, enthrones her, crowns
her and let's her know in unmistakable Ian.
guage that such is the case. l have heard
men say: "Of course love my wife. What
do you take me fora brute? Well, no; not
exactly such detestable thing, or that deli.
cate, ladylike little wife of yours never would
have married you. But there is a resem-
blance between you and that quadruped in
the fact that brutes never speak their feel.
ings Of what use to me is a gold mine in
Australia or diamond field in Brazil if the
riches of them are net quarried2 Where is
the sense or reason of your loving your wife
if you never speak it, or look it, or act it? In
fact, you don't love her if you do none of
these things; for if there is truer aphorism
than that murder will OUT it is that love
cannot be concealed.
am well aware Of the argument in favor
of the sterner sex-that they are all day ex.
posed to the friction of business, and, when
night comes, they ought to be received into a
quiet, peaceful, happy home, where they
may don slippers and smoking jacket, and
read or doze ON the library lounge until bed.
time. Very good. But your wife is all day
subjected to something far worse than the
contact with business annoyances, and that
is the mOnotonOus, endless routine of domes.
tic drudgery, which, home keeper, home
lover that she is wears and tears on the SEN
sitive nerves in a way few men appreciate.
When evening comes, the babies are asleep,
she wants little exhilarating change, some
thing rather more effervescent than the
pleasure of feeling alone in the same rooms
she has occupied all day, watching the hand
some features of her recumbent lord, or i'm
mersed in the columns Of a newspaper.
ON THE COSTLY MONUMENT.
Now which shall it be2 The husbands
comfort or the wife's? l can tell you the re-
suit 1t will be the survival of the fittest,
and, as he is the stronger physically, and gets
plenty of air and exercise, the chances are
nine hundred and ninety-nine out thousand
that before his eldest child is in its teens
there will be a costly monument in some ST
lent resting place. Sacred to the memory
of my beloved wife" While, if Gods own
truth were carved on that pure, white cross
in letters of blazing gold, they would read:
"A woman's life wasted; heart disappoint-
ed unto death; hopes destroyed-by little
things"
Yes, little thingsl l know a husband,
bright, intellectual man, who is killing his
wife by his philosophy, he calls it, that he
never fails to air upon every occasion when
his wife is in distress or disappointment or
trouble. No matter how keenly she feels any
pain, physical or emotional, he invariably
freezes her with his formula: "Well, what
are you going to do about it?" Never a low
ing word of sympathy, a kiss or a caress-and
yet he'd be insulted if you told him he didn't
love her-never a word, 'It is too bad, dear;
but as it is unavoidable, can't l help you
bear It'll" know that wife would sacrifice
ten years of her Life if she could get out of
her mind that cold, judicial, unsympathetic
tone of voice and look that she will carry
with her into eternity.
When that husband is in straits, which he
often is, and is depressed physically, for he
is not in good health, and unstrung nervous
ly, as is often the case; when his famous cold
hearted "What are you going to do about it,"
is temporarily silenced-that wife of his, that
he never did deserve and is killing by de-
preeS. Is ali gentle WomanlY svrnnathv com