Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1889-03-22
A COMEDY IN THREE ACTS,
THE NEW THEATRICAL MANAGER
AND THE THINGS HE LEARNED.


The Leading Man rests his cigar above the
sign. Rules such as these are for ordinary
mortals, not for him. He regards himself il
the looking glass with something of pleasure
in his gaze. He sits down in chair opposite
the dressing table and shouts for his servant
This worthy rushes in at once and the even
ing's transformation scene begins.
With defines learned by long experience
the dresser removes the masters street attire
The master, in the meantime, is engaged il
looking over the evenings correspondence
Here is letter from stagestruck schoo
girl desiring an introduction. The note i.
torn up and thrown in the corner. The Lead
ing Man has long passed that stage of hi.
his profession. The next letter is a request
for an autograph. The dresser, who is E
better writer than his master, attends to this
department. He takes certain delight il
writing his masters name and deceiving the
innocent. All dressers are alike in this par
eicular.
PUTTING ON THE HANDSOME.
Now comes the make up" The Leading
Man is strictly intent on business He throws
away his cigar, looks earnestly at his relec
ton in the glass, rolls up his sleeves and be
gins to work. First he covers his face with q
grease preparation which serves as q ground
work for the paint. Next the eyes are pen
ciled, the wrinkles drawn, the mustache de
fined and the wig carefully adjusted. The
work is done rapidly, years OF experience are
brought into play in as few minutes. The
joining place Of the wig must be hidden.
More paint is used, and as the work progresses
the entire countenance becomes transformed
to such an extent that the Leading Mans
mother would never have known her son had
she seen him. A last glance in the looking
glass and the work is over.
Ii the meantime the dresser has changed
the shoes, prepared the costume for the act,
and arranged all its minor details.
The door now opens and the manager
enters. His hat rests jauntily on the back
part of his head. He smokes very strong
and singularly atrocicus looking cigar; his
talk shows decided Hebraic accent.
''How's the house?" is the first question
that greets his entrance The manager
shakes his head There are volumes of in
formation in that shake.
about $500, mostly paper
An ominous silence prevails.
The manager sits down upon trunk, kicks
vigorously and finally pulls a bunch of dra-
matte papers from an inside pocket. They
afford him little satisfaction.
''Them fellows don't know good play
when they sees it, he remarks sadly "They
are precious lot of jays" The Leading
Man turns to his master encouragingly.
''Never mind, old fell. Wait until we get
New York opening, that's all. They can't
do us, you know You're splendid loser
ono T hot Nav
son we'll laugh at this
The managers countenance brightens; he
is pleased at the compliment, for it is his first
season in the business. Next year, if he lives,
he will know more, but the probabilities are
that his wealth will not be source of great
trouble to him. 1t is the common lot of NOR
tails. Why should we seek the exception?
Presently the bell rings for the rising OF
the curtain. The manager takes his place in
the prosecenium box and leans back with the
lordly air of q Standard OIL magnnte, pre-
pared to applaud at the proper time and
place. The people in the body Of the house
look at him curiously and envy him. They
don't know ALL
THE MANAGERS TRIALS
The act is over and an adjournment to the
dressing room is again in order The leading
man is wiping his heated brow and drinking
a large schooner of beer which one of the
kings guards has just brought in from the
nearest saloon. The manager, enters and is
invited to share the feast. He drains his
glass quickly, when knock is heard at the
door. The property man enters.
PLEASE, scr, want tin cints for to buy a
cake for the third act"
''To buy what."
ga cake, sor, for the dinner scene VIZ
need cake, you knows it, sor.''
''Nhat, in the name of heaven, became o.
the cake you got yesterday Tell me al
oncer'
''PlaZe, the rats ate it last noight, sor.''
The manager swears long and loudly
''You're pack of thieves all around. Money
money, all the time. Last night the stags
baby got sick. Had to get another; S. out
Now you want a cake. I'll give you The
cake, but, by Cd, sirl if it goes you go too
You hear me. Rats is too thin a game t.
work on u.s."
''Third acts inn screams the call boy TIL,
leading man walks toward the stage, leavin:
the manager still sitting on the dressing room
trunk, smoking vigorously. By and by ther,
comes q gentle tap at the door, 1t is gentle.
very gentle.
Como in" growls the manager. The dool
opens little by little and the soubrette enters.
She looks charming; her timidity is delight
full to behold
''Well, what's the matter now?' says ths
in rather modified tones. "Oh, sir
you're not like the rest Of the managers I'vt
played for; indeed you're not. II you were
wouldn't have troubled you. But you see
sir, I'm all alone. Mother has gone to New
York and 1 only want one weeks salary il
advance to pay my board. Can't have it
please!" The blue eyes look up SO appeal
ngly. The manager cannot stand their gaze.
well, you can have it this once, but mind,
this is the last time. Alone, Ell? I'll walk
home with you tonight if you're lonely"
sob, thank you, sir" is the answer, ant
the maiden vanishes.
The show has now come to an end. The
audience file out to the music of the orches
ira, and the manager goes in front tc
wither with his glances the souls of any OF
the critics who may have been in the body OF
the house. Then he walks back once more
He reaches the dressing rooms. They arc
empty and the gas is out 'Where is Mis-
M" he asks of the back door man.
"Just gone on, sor, with gint in a coupe
WAS it Mr.. M" he asks, mentioning
the name of the leading man.
at was, sor,' is the answer
Sold again, guess I'll go to the hotel anG
go to bed,' soliloquized the manager. my
names Dennis, anyhow"
The play was indeed Philadelphia
Times
An Experiment for Young People.
Take two cumbersome filled half full
Of salt water, and one filled half full of fresh
water Put fresh egg in the tumbler OF
fresh water. 1t will sink to the bottom. Put
it in the tumbler of salt water, and it viii
float on top. Carefully pour the brin,
through long funnel into the bottom of The
tunlbler containing the fresh water The
fresh water will rise to the top, and the egg
will lie directly in the middle of the glass,
r,oisad bafwapO tba two