Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1889-08-30

for two long hours those men sat down on q
ladder and discussed the question whether
back gate should open inwards or out
wards, and the advantages offered by either
situation. Mr.. Bowser contended for the
gate opening outwards, and the neighbor
for the opposite, and the discussion resulted
in Mr.. Bowser getting red clear back OF
the ears and jumping up to exclaim:
"Well, let's drop the subject right here.
There can be cranks on alley gates as well
as on politics and religion"
"And there can be lunatics outside Of the
asylums," hotly replied the neighbor.
Don't call me lunatic"
sand don't you call me crank"
go homo and hang your old gate to the
moonn
"I'll hang it according to the rules Of COM
mon sense and don't you forget It,"
When Mr.. Bowser came in TO wash his
hands observed:
Mr.. Bowser, did IL ever occur to you
that there was any thing in life beyond
hanging back gatem
He replied with n "humphw of disgust.
"Select some subject of sense, Mr.. Bow
ser-a art, science, mineralogy-t labor
question or self-government, and discuss it
with calmness and Judgment and learn
something worth remembering for half an
hourln
He looked around in desperate, helpless
way, aud put on his hat and went OF with.
out a WORT in reply. l wasn't going TO let
him off en- that, however. When he came
home That evening 1 had Mrs. Orfendorf
over TO supper, and as soon Us we were
seated at tho table qucred:
Doesn't it strike You that Germany's
policy on the Samoan question is one of con.
ciliation instead Of aggression.
sit certainly does" she replied, 'but
there may be q hidden motive behind this
seeming submission. Trace the record of
the man back rs far as you will, and his
policy has been either aggression or stra-
tegy.n
The stare Mr.. Bowser favored me with
made my flesh creep.
81 do so hope you can come down to the
next meeting of the Woman's Scientific,
Political and Literary Club" said Mrs. Or.
fendorf, MS she toyed with her strawber.
ries. "Those gatherings are very, very in.
teresting. AT our last meeting we dicussed
the Drift period, and at the one next week
we shall discuss Two Proposed Amend.
ments TO the Constitution OF the United
States"
Mr.. Bowser sat there, turning red
and pale by turns, until his chair grew so
hot that he had to pretend headache and
get excused. l anticipated an awful trag.
sdy after my visitor took her departure, but
Mr.. Bowser contented himself with saving:
"Now that that shallow-pated, long-nosed
old nuisance has finally taken he leave let's
20 to bed.n
He regained his assurance after couple
Of days, however. was talking to our two
year-old baby, and talking as all mothers
talk, when Mr.. Bowser flung down his paper
and cXclaimed:
Mrs. Bowser, you make me tired talking
to that youngun that way! No wonder so
many people grow up to be sap-headedr'
"How shall taIki''
"Talk sense-the same us you would to
an adult. He's old enough to understand,
and believe he will appreciate it."
VERY well; I'll try"
"Thanli you. It's more than expected
you'd do"
The trial came that night. We had
scarcely got TO he'd when baby awoke and
began TO whino. He had got cold and was
fevcrlsh.
Snow, Harry,"I began, "snug down and
try to go to sleep. ''lts nothing serious,
and object to being kept awake"
He howlcd more Justify.
"My son." l continued, "this exhibition of
ingratitude astonishes me, and insist that
you change your course of conduct at once,
or leave my house. Filial respect, IL moth.
ing"
"What in thunder and blazes are YOU
talking aboutW roOred Mr.. Bowser, Us he
sat up in bed
"Im talking sense to baby"
'Not by jug-ful, you aintw
"Then you try it."
'Ill try 1t by wringing his neck II he
doesn't shut off steam. He's showing out OF
spitew
"Then warn him that you may be com.
PEELED to inflict due chastisement, but do II
calmly and grammatically."
"! | | ~
That's what Mr.. Bowser said as he jumped
sut OF bed and disappeared into the spare
room, and that was the last saw Of him un.
I'll morning.-Detroit Free Press.