Sturgis advertiser. (Sturgis, Dakota [S.D.]) 1887-1???, 1889-04-13
SAVING HARD SIN N Frs.
BIZ JOHN STEPHEN.

Two commercial travellers sat in the Of
| fee Of the Brunswick Hotel. Tom, "
said the youn.er, Il have just obtained an
| inside position in the firm, and will leave
the road, imagine, for some time. have
had enough of hotel and restaurant life, and
am determined to try the portal Of home,
If not home itself, o boarding house. Do
you know Of any good place?o
| No, Jim; I've not been boarding for
years. The best way is to put an adver-
tisement in one Of the Sunday papers, and
| cago is divided into two classes. those who
| board and those who keep house.
Il should like to get nice, quiet place,
where could have some home comforts, a
little music, chat in the parlor, and that
sort Of thing, you know.
4Oh, yes. know all abeut it, Mr.. James
Barclay. You have got romantic notions
of boarding houses and expect to find in
them all the comforts of home, but you will
learn that there is no place like home, and
| trying to find substitute in boarding
house is like trying to gather figs from
thistles and grapes from thorns.
4Come now, was the CHEEKY rejoinder,
don't try to discourage me. think I
can get through an advertisement just the
place want.
| there is nothing under the sun that may
not be obtained through the medium of an
advertisement"
@Yes, believe you. And don't think
there is anything TOO ridiculous on earth
| in the way of an advertisement that will
not elicit reply.
Then, suppose you illustrate the truth
Of your own theory by advertising for
board in some quaint, out of the way man
ner, that will ward off the average race of
professional boarding house keepers, and
bring to your relief one of these matronly
souls, full Of the milk Of human kindness,
who only keep boarders for the sake of
company, and are entirely above mercen-
airy motives?"
Since you have been talking have
doubt, may consider ridiculous, but / bet
you supper at Kinsley's shall get an
answer to it. Here it is.
Mr.. James Baclay, taking pencil and
note book from his pocket, wrote the fol-
| lowing:
Board Wanted-A young gentleman,
| nth the best of references, desires board
| 10 refined family Of good social position,
There his edifying conduct will be c0nsid-
6red as sufficient compensation for. his
board. Address J. B. %, this Office. y
Great C@sar!" exclaimed the other, in
| genuine astonishment, you don't imagine
for moment that even in this big city of
| Chicago, which contains every shade and
variety Of characters. from the sweetest
| saints to the sourest cranks, that you will
find anyone SO philanthropieally foolish as
| to answer that advertisements"
Yes, Mr.. Thomas Temple, sage and
sober philosopher and man Of the world
| that you are, will get genuine answers to
this advertisement. Will you accept the
| bet?"
Il should say so! And being something
! of an epicure, will concoct the most ex-
pensiye menu I can think of, and will do
| the supper given me by the Don Quixote
Of advertisers the most ample justice.
Don't be too sure that the entertain-
ment will be at my expense.
Both gentlemen, after lighting their CT
CARS, strolled to the Office of one of the
| great dailies, where the singular adyer-
tisement was duly paid for and ordered to
| be inserted.
After this operation the friends parted,
| The last remark of Mr.. Barclay being:
Now, my doubling st. Thomas, you will
| see that get an answer, and shall enjoy
-Four supper and prove the truth of my
theory"
In number with four figures on Michi-
| gan avenue sat mother and daughter in o
| cosy anteroom that had every appear
ance, if not of oppressive opulence, yet
| of elegance and refinement.
Il think, my DEAR" said the mother,
| shat Harry needs more cheerful asso-
| ciates than we are; although, poor boy, he
| bears we'll up under his affection. But,
ever since that dreadful accident which
1 - 10 II 30 srrf
once SO buoyant, seem to be depressed.
I should like to engage some agreeable
person to come and read to him every day
| Tor an hour or so. 1t would relieve you,
my dear, and give Harry an opportunity
| to converse with some one who knows
more of the outside affairs of life, of
| which, in our exclusive retirement, we
| have been SO long ignorant.
yes, ma, think Harry would be
much improved by coming in contact
daily with an intelligent person from the
| active circles of life. One who could talk
| to him of his old business associates and
haunts. could never interest myself on
those subjects, and / actually forget the
| price of wheat two minutes after being
| told the latest market rate of that exceed
ingly fluctuating staple. always thought
staples were more steady characters.
| Il hope Harry will not interest him.
self too much in that speculative COM
modify, replied the !. mother as a shade
| crossed over her face. He can make all
the money it takes to crafty an ordinary
| ambition out of his late fathers business.
But suppose, my dear, you write an adyer-
tisement that will secure the person we
want.
Suppose, mamma, replied the daugh-
| ter, II look over the newspaper and get an
| idea from it, about the way to word it..
| Here are all kinds of wants; board wanted,
and SO forth. But just listen! Did You
| ever hear such an advertisement as this?
"tBoald wanted-A young gentleman,
| with the best of references, desires board
in refined, social family Of good social
position, where his editying conduct will
be considered as sufficient compensation
| for his board.
Did you ever hear Of such assurance2
Does this person really expect to find peo-
| pie to board him for the benefit of his
| edffying conduct"
1T is rather singular advertisement,
replied the mother. Il have heard many
| subterfuge of taking boarders for COM
panions, but not without compensation.
Perhaps this edifying persons conduct
might be of some good to Harry; but the
| probabilities are that he is goody -goody
| divinity student, and you know Harry is
i something of Robert Elsmere and has
| peculiar views on religion.
But, my dear, you are taking it Tor
granted that the advertiser is divinity
| student. In all probability he Is very
different sort Of person. He states no has
Il NJ q