The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1889-02-06
HUMOR OF THE DAY.
Bound in calr'-Xeal.

'Bound in calf'-Veal
Caught on the hy-Trout.
Two physicians are paradox.
The burning question-Smoke.
Fireside companion-The poker.
A loan tellow-The pawnbroker.
Unpopular reserves--Jim- jams.
A writ of attachment-A love letter.
Old maids know what mis-spent life
means.
The oldest and n ost inveterate smoker
in history is Vesuvius.
1t is the astronomer who most fire..
quently rises to observe.
When q man doubles his fists you can
hardly say he has four hands.
There is a resemblance between books
and real estate. Both have titles.
The man who lives from hand to
mouth should not have far to go for his
dinner.
To make Russian name--imitate the
"tchug" of a bull frog, give one snee c
and say ski"
Honor and respect the busy bee.
Once full, he makes straight for home
--Nep York News.
A young New England baby was
named William after his father, who was
bilious. -H~per's Bazar.
The manufacturers of perforated chair
seats have combined. Their object can
be seen through, and will be sat upon.
A barking dog is the most courteous
of all animals. He makes his bow to
hxy 0h
Iicdn.
Money can slip through pretty small
hole sometimes. A Brooklyn man lost
considerable sum lately through pew
rent
All the street cars have sign ''no 5
smoking" and vet any conductor will
helpa woman to a lght.-Ne'0 York.
World.
A good many of the cashiers who are
settling IN Canada are those who have
neglected to do any settling oveg here
Neio York Neps
Woman to tramp)-"How's the soupp
Tramp-"Tain' quite strong enough,
ma'am. wish you would wash few
more dishes in it."
Waiter-'You want frogs. eh ~
Guest-'Not zee whole animaile, 1 want
zee, vat you call him-zee drumsteoks.
philadelphia Record.
Brown-"Did you dispose Of that last
lyric yon wrote" Young Byron-"O
yes, got it off on the publishers for a
song" Yaakee Blade.
Duluth people say that that city is
growing so rapidly that, sitting down IN
the suburbs, with the city against the
skVlina Won can see IL grow
'It requires only two things to run
successful campaign, said the politi-
clan. "And what are theyl" asked a
bystander. ''Dollars and sense"
Tramp, picking up five cent piece
"a bloody nickel, hum! Wasn't nothin'
but Jonah all my life. Anybody else
but me "a pick'd up that nickel and it "a
been quarter, sure" (Sighs).
Shakespeare was slightly mixed iu his
"seven ages" 1t is the "whining
school boy" whom the maternal eye has
detected in some fragrant act Of dis
obedience that ''shifts into the slippered
pantaloon."
Leader Of the Boggsville male quintet
to editor of the Boggsyile Herald
"What can we do to interest the public
in our organization2" Editor (wiihout
looking up)--"Disband " - Darlington
Free Press.
A baby girl in Missouri has been named
Rainbow. SiXtern years hence, when
she is caught in a summer shower size
should feel very much at home, although
she would then be a little rain deer
Norris,orn Herald.
They say the German Emperor
Is spelling 10 pitch in
He sharpens up mis- spurs and longs
To make the sawdust spin
who wants to pit cock against
The Bantam Of Berlin,'
Huntington Free Press
Lawyer-'So that is the entire list of
your debtsM lnsolyent Manager-"Oh.
no; there are many other little items"
Lawyer ''Don't you want me 20 add
them in details" Manager-"No; Just
say, for further particulars see small
bills. n--America.
An exchange wants the name of the
man who invented the wheelbarrow:
but what many more persons crave is the
name of the man who let's his wheel
barrow stand in the middle of the side
walk after dark. The latter is more
deserving OF death. .-Norrist0on Herad
"Did that lady buy auythingl" asked
the jewe'er of his new boy, as the lady
in question left the store, apparently in
a temper. ''che did not She asked
me for an old gold breast pin, ana /
asked her if she took this store for Junk
shop. Then she went out. n--Joeeleg's
Weekly.