Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1889-12-26
English Prejudice Against Pipes.

English Prejudice Against Pipes.
The worst of these changes Is tina
English people chatter and shiver, ant
sneeze and blow their noses, in de
termincd sort of way, as if there was
no remedy for il all.
"Why don't you have firc?" said
| one day to lady who was sitting
with blue knuckles in drawing-room
that felt like refrigerator.
"What" she cried, ga fire in Sep
tember! never heard of such a
thing. Fancy ones coal bill"
"But," said |, "what if September
is as cold as December"
"Oh, | never begin fires till, at the
very least, the end of October" she
answered; 'not till November, if ]
can possibly help it,"
'It is not a question of dates" said
!, but one of temperature, l should
think"
al wouldn't break through my rule
for the world" she replied; "my
mother always followed it, and so shall
l." and she looked over my head with
the grand air of the regulation Prim-
rose Dame. Clancy fire in Septem-
Der. never heard of such thing"
And so it is, think you will find,
with most English people. They pre-
fer to shake and culver with cold
sooner than "begin fires" before the
regular date for them.
Even then the fires do not do much
good. As general thing, / do not
suppose there are worse warmed houses
in the world than English houses, ex-
cept, perhaps, the huts of the Esqui-
maux. An English fire is not intended
to warm the house or room in which it
burns. 1t is only meant to sit at-a
sort of spot where You can warm your
self by drawing your chair up to it, or
standing with your back to it, when
ever, after sitting out in the room away
from it, you have got chilled through
and through.
ats unaccountable to me that you
don't have your houses warmed by hot
air or hot-water pipes" l heard an
American gentleman once say to the
English owner of one of the finest
houses in the southern counties, at
which he was staying on visit. "It
would save YOU extensively in fires"
81 wouldn't have such a thing in my
house." replied the Englishman with a
snort; s'imagine the stuffy air! And
fancy giving up ones fires !-one's
fireplace of winters night
The blazing logs are one of winters
greatest charms"
ITO look at" said the American;
''not to feel. An oil portrait of fire |
inserted in the CRATE would give as
much heat twelve feet away from it."
s'But who wants TO get twelve feet |
away from it?' exclaimed the English
man; .sno one is such fool as that, ! |
should think. Draw your chair up to
i as close as YOU like. That's the way /
we do in England"
"If there are a dozen people in the
-oom, what are you going TO do? All
iraw up TO the fire? Take q pretty /
zig fireplace, ] should Judge. You
ant squeeze in over four in front of
my fireplace Pve seen, when you con-
der the chairs. Going to let the
,ther eight freeze before your face
md eyes,"
The Englishman looked cornered
or moment.
"What? Eli? Oh''-and q smile
it up his face as happy thought
anne to his rcscue-"first come, first
erved. That's my motto"
Now, it is curious thing that, about
tx months after this, the Englishman
ct his house for year and went
broad. The people who took it had
ot-Air pipes put into the house at their
wn expense and without the know
edge of the owner. After their ten
ncy was up and the Englishman back
a possession again, was staying in
he neighborhood, and one day went
yer to call.
$50 you put them in after ALL" said
noticing a suspicious-looking grating
4 the wall of the library.
'.No, didn't, I'm ashamed to say"
e replied; ..but the people who had
ne house did. | was awfully angry
hen | found it out. But --"
naming the American gentleman)
was quite right, and I've been thinking
writing to him TO tell him and send
e him an apology for my rudeness." :
"Then you like them?'
al never knew what comfort was {
efore.p
!