, 1889-09-25
A
Making Award In the Dark Region to
the Greatest Enemy of Horses

the Greatest Enemy of Horses
Weird. unearthly shapes, as if nov
ed by some resistless impulse 10 o
greEate at a common center, hurried
through the sulphurous air that over
hung the bottomless pits and fiery
lakes OF the Region Of Darkness. Wan,
cadaverous, uneasy s~pecters, new to
the dread mysteries of Inferno, side by
side with the tough and hardened
Oldest Inhabitants, whizzed horribly
along, and the grimy walls Of Pande-
monium echoed presently TO the dis
cordant niurmuring and snarling of
one OF the largest throngs that had
ever gathered there.
Il have called you together, my
countrymen," said the presiding off
Ger of the internal regions, for the
purpose of deciding a disputed point.
A contest has arisen" he continued in
a voice that pierced the remotest cav
ern within the vast inclosure, las TO
which one OF my faithful subjects can
claim the honor of having inflicted
the most torture on horses during his
earthly existence. The contestants
will now have an opportunity to be
heard"
Il was a country blacksmith for
afty-three years, called out one of the
claimants as he mounted the platform
and looked complacently about.
There was a murmur of applause,
and a general shaking of heads, nc
oompanied by whispered observations
to the effect hat his record would be
hard TO beat.
An uncanny specter, with n counte-
nance that would have broken the
strongest camera on the surface OF the
earth, came to the platform next.
Il was n harness maker" he said.
II invented the stiff bit"
Il made the first pair of spurs" ex-
claimed the next candidate as he ell
bowed the ex-harness maker off the
stage.
"Gammonl |" said another claimant,
II set the fashion of cutting horses
tails Off"
"And / made the first machine for
clipping them" announced another.
The presiding officer checked the ap
plause that followed, the assembly
having seemed to be on the point Of
bestowing the award on the last speak
err without further hearing.
A hard looking resident mounted
the rostrum.
MY friends" he said, II made the
first check rein"
In vain the chairman attempted to
silence the cheering of the audience.
II was only after some of the noisiest
of the spirits near the door were
thrown out and the warning given
that the galleries would be cleared if
the offense were repeated hat order
was restored.
Suddenly a commanding voice rang
out:
II invented the barb wire fence"
A deathlike stiffness pervaded the
cavernous place. With the convic-
ton that no contestant would have
the hardihood TO dispute the claim of
the last speaker the chairman half
rose as if TO announce that the contro-
versy was at an end.
Atthis moment a comparatively mild
looking and unpretending shape took
its place on the platform and looked
timidly about.
Speak out if you have anything to
sayl' said the presiding officer, almost
contemptuously.
IL was the first man that ever
paved the street of a city with gran
tie"
Amid the widest and most tumult-
uous applause that had ever shaken
the walls of Sheol's capitol the Prince
of Darkness placed a crown of laurel
on the head of the unpretending COB
lin, shook his hand warmly, and pro-
claimed that the contest vas over
Chicago Tribune.