Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1889-10-26
FLASHES OF FUN.
Called to order-The waiter.

CALLED to order-The waiter.
A RIFLE team: A pair of pickpockets.
How e8S short felt for hats supply
long felt wait?
TIE electrician is good soldier. He
knows low To charge battery.
GoEs without saying-the Young
man too bashful to pop the question.
"DID Won ever fall in love" eyes, hut
I 60. out with the assistance of her
father"
4 MAN ma. no. b" afraid of danger
hut lie looks down In the mouth when
he prepares 10 descend into mine.
4 DISPATCH saws whisky is going
mp in New York" The New'Y"rkers.
are probably sucking it through straws.
IRIS no more than right"
80 say all the misses.
That tho boys should bring Gun!drops
When we furnish kisses"
No. colonel. you cannot Law rail
road with her tracks any more than
you can get mosqui'c bill through
Congress.
An exchange speaks Of a new tor
bacco center An old tobacco scenter
is the man who smokes vile cigar IL
She psrlor.
A KANSAS minister snvs: Il have
been q far more useful man since the
Lord revealed to me that waa never
70 he great man.
"tNCTHER hunting accident" Tia.
seems 70 he tho principal occupation o!
hun ers-huniicg accidents. And they
find them fire. Iuently.
tMrrRriNENcE: Cabby Where are
YOU EUine, sir? Bjackson--None of
your business. just dive there, and
stop asking impertinett questions.
THERE is no use camping out for tn,
sake of keeping cool. At the New
fUrs militia encampment the heat was
in tents, Just thc same as elsew here.
THE regular recipe: Miss Twinkle
Why, Mr.. Wrinkle, what It cold you
have. Are you taking anything for it
Mr. Winkle-Yes, ma am; four pocket
handkerchiefs day.
Il CAN'T understand all this fuss
about using electricity for executions,
remarked Judge Lynch, of Kansas, re-
lectively. Out in our section We have
used the telegraph pole for years
In the Sullivan case in Mississippi a
deputy sheriff couldn't swear that the
ring was in Marion county. Marion is
the only county in the United States,
then, that hasn't ring-court house
| ring.
4 CoUNTRYMAN had consulted a for
tune-teller as to his future: you'll be
| poor, kind sir, until you're 80, was the
prediction of the Pythoness. And
| then 2" "Oh! after that You'll get used
| to it."
4 pEDKDDEN patient i'll 81 kansa:
| hospital who was eXl erlmented On witt
the elixir of life, was able TO leave hi:
bed the next day. He bad to, in fact
in order to fill place prepared for him
| IN the cemetery.
4 PASSENGER on an ocean stcamel
complaining of the untidincss of tn,
table service, said il Didn't look u,
though il was ever washed on board
Waiting for it to he washed ashore
probably" said companion.
well, my dear, how would Farmer
Brown suit you for husband? Ht
seems uncommon sweet on you lately.
Perhaps go, father; but his hair is Sc
red that -" True. true. my child
but You should recollect that lie ha
very little of il"
BEAKFMAN-Rushv Nashville
Train stops here ten minutes TO
lunch, Deacon Blossum--Seems t.
me that's mighty queer r1le, Miriam
Gy. Well, let's git out that basket c
sandwiches quick if we've got to ca
em in ten minutes.
Miss SLYPpE--Mr. Penteather is st
easily embarrassed, don't you think
asked him yesterday to tell me jus
what he really thought OF me. and h
was so taken by surprise that he coul'
net say word. Miss Flyppe-Tha
was MOI embarra ssment, it was merel
politeness.
"Do You belorg to the salvation
army" 10 asked of a stHrn-vlsaGc'
woman who stood Mt his side. No, sir
lido not. But in this ger Grafton # tire
men," she added, with q with GRIM
glance at She row of sitting males, e
seem to belong to the standing army.
She got seat
BLINKs-What has become of d
Fashion? Jinks-He and his famil
are in Europe. They wanted to go, AM
/ paid their expenses. "Eh? Wha
You paid their expenses" "Well,
amounts to the same thing. ! SAY
their summer cottage advertised 10
rent and / rented it,.
"VELL, Mr.. Isaacstein, how ish bliss
ness?" Business vOs Ioody good
aber noding eggstra." Il hat been hal
ing a poody hard time myselluf. NJ
poy laid der fly paper on der chair an
/ sat down on it," "Vhell, how doe
dot affect your bissness ?" 81 got shtuc
on tiy-paper, don't it ?"