The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1889-11-09
MISCELLANEOUS.

NtNAA w
world from London in slxty-nine days,
by way Of Vancouver.
"A gentleman meeting one of his
friends who was insolvent. expressed
great concern for his embarrassment.
You are mistaken, my dear SIR" was
the reply, tits not L; tbs my creditors
who are embarrassed"
"A New Castle, Pa, woman mixed
mess of bread and set it near the open
window. When she got ready to put it
in the oven she was surprised to find
chicken standing in it. He had got his
feet in the dough and was unable to
eXtricate them.
"A steamer sails from England ev-
cry year for the mouth of the Yenesel
river, taking merchandise thus direct
to Siberia by water. The steamer gen.
orally manages to get through such ice
as it encounters, and it sends its mer-
chandise up the Yenesel into the very
heart of Siberia on 6at-bottomed, light
draught steamboats,.
"A little girl from charitable in
stitution spent day in the country.
She knew SO little of green things
growing that she pulled up weeds and
plants to see how they were fastened
in the ground. An ear of green corn
was given her to play with. ''Oh! oh!
oh!' she said, ''its all wrapped up in
little green blankets!"
Only Question of Time.-Guest
(who has been waiting impatiently for
his pastry) Il ordered that tapioca
pudding at least fifteen minutes ago."
Waiter: Eyes, sab. Takes bout two
hours for tapico to soak. It'll be along
by an by. Ere's one of the afnoon pa
pers.' sab. Chicago Tribune.
"A large American eagle few on the
ship William Starbuck recently in the
Gulf Stream. and was picked up in an
exhausted condition. The bird had a
glass eye, with the undecipherable in
itials of the supposed owners name in
it. The birds craw was entirely emp
ty, and it is supposed to have been car
ried to sea by the force of the wind and
was unable to reach the shore.
In Western drama called "Black
Hawk" the bartender finds himself
obliged to listen to this: "You dom
know me? You don't know me? Pm
Bloody Bill, the Howling Terror! I'm
creased thunderbolt from Hell's Can
yon! When l twitter the clouds hide
themselves! When 1 yell the rocks
split, the waters stop running, and the
sun turns back. When | Shrek
'Y-e-i-o-u. it rains b-l-u-d!'
-Americus and Sumter County can
boast of the oldest horses and mules of
any city or county in the State of Geor-
gia. There are seven horses whose
ages will aggregate 200 years, and six
mules whose ages will aggregate the
same. Some of them are remarkably
young looking and get about in as live
ly a manner as if they were only five
years old One of the horses included
in the estimate Was offered for sale at
auction recently that is known to be
thirty years old.
Sir Edwin Arnold lately lectured
W Ollc oluuCHlS anu DIOlSSoOIo vi 1Iel
ward college in the College theatre, in
Cambridge. His subject was the philos-
ophy of the Brahmins, aud in the course
Of his remarks he said that lin India,
with its 200,000,000 inhabitants, there
never occurs marriage of inclination.
Yet there are more happy marriages in
India, more happy homes, more pure
domestic relations than in any other
part of the world"
"A gossip writes that new London
freak is "Ihe Peace Society,"" The men,
bers assemble for tea in fashionable
studios, languidly look through collec-
tons of sketches and as languidly listen
to music, and then, with continued lam
guor, discuss questions for banishing
ideas of war from the youthful mind.
One idea is to treat war as merely an
incident in text books of history. This
is the society which, some time ago,
began its self-appointed mission by
recommending the Punishment of drums
and tin soldiers from the nursery.
An American joke sometimes loses
itself through translation into another
language. A native humorist wrote,
Notwithstanding that a lady should
always be quiet and self-contained. she
can not even enter place of worship
without a tremendous hustle" A
French writer reproduces it in this
form: According to an American
author, the ladies of that country are
so greedy of notoriety that they can
not enter the holy sanctuary without
disturbing the kneeling worshipers
with their vulgar and unseemly ado. -"
A German, long resident in Lon
don, who left home at twenty years of
age, thereby evading service in the
army. sent to the English papers a
communication received from the au-
thorities in "the Fatherland' in an
swer to an application to be permitted
to come and visit his father ere he
died. Come by all MEANS" was in
effect the austere rejoinder, but you
will have to pay fine of E6 10s., I'M
dergo six weeks drilling and spend
six months in fortress. This was a
little too much for the correspondent