The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1889-01-18
LAST WEDDING FEE.

LAST WEDDING FEE.
Some years ago, when marriage
licenses had to be paid for, the
Marylanders and virginians rode
across the narrow frontier In the
valley and married for nothing in
Pennsylvania. Of course they gave
something to the preacher for his
trouble. The conquence was that
oil the preachers on the Maryland
side of the line became as lean as
geese and the preachers across the
line in Pennsylvania grew as fat us
turkey gobblers. But there was one
preacher near Waynesboro who did
not grow fat. Garrick Howton, who
did the largest business, became
leaner and leaner the faster lie mar
ried people. He was too mean, the
peopied said, to enjoy life like Il good
Methodist initerant or a rubicund
priest. No chicken coops were ugi-
tated ut his approach. No little
pigs squealed and got under their
anxious mammus when Garrick
leaned over the sty and surveyed
them.
Nobody knew what sect or church
Garrick belonged to there, where
everybody was his own theologian.
He called his church tile Zionskitcs
and was the only one of 1.-THE Bis
hop indecd-cXcept his son. Wcasley
Howton, whom he called "tho dea-
con-"
The church building did not exist,
though branches Of the Zionskite
body were said to be "ful,ler west"
by both the bishop and the deacon.
Inquisitive people limited that there
never would have been as many as
two zionskites except for the fat
marriage fees which were to be had
along Mason and Dixon's line and
that Bishop Garrick Howton only
ordained his son Weasley into the
priesthood reluctantly that lie might
occasionally take some recreation
himself and not miss any runaway
couples which should arrive between
midnight and morning.
All the people far or near under
stood that the Howtons would m nrry
anybody, the delivery of the certifi-
cate being conditional on the pay
ment of the fee: and pains were taken
to impress strangers that the ZION
sixties discipline the certificate was u
part of the ceremony itself
a story was started and grew that
old HowtOn married children for the
snke of his fees.
This story came up romsorrowing
and broken-hearted parents in Vir-
ginia and from the rich manors and
hamlcts of Frederick in MARYLAND.
The Pennsylvaninns never verified
these reports because it was none of
their business.
That was the golden age, when the
people of every State did to til. peo-
pie of every other State Just what
they pleased, and the boundary line
made outrage justice or simplicity
criminal.
As time advanced Bishop Howton
became q widower, and his mind was
set on marrying again.
1t may have been the example of
marrying children under age, torn
from their parents by their own dis
obedient impulses or the powerful
sinister influence of man. or it nav
have been the childish beauty Of
Eunice lIowton, his distant relative,
which doomed her to become the
Bishops wife when she should he old
enough to receive his orders and not
bring the laws of Pennsylvania down
upon his head. The Bishop bided
his time.
Eunice was hardly fifteen, II slender,
gray eyed blonde, whose feet, touch
the ground az they would, turned in
to lines of grace and music seemed to
be playing as she walked or moved,
to such harmonies did she bend:
while in the action of ter head upon
her delicate neck and even in the
motion OF her lips there appeared to
be violin music whistled by her spirit
as the upland zephyrs played upon
it and her heart desired to dance.
The country people said that this
was because her mother had been an
actress and a dancer.
Somewhere back in the undisccrned
past tvngucnpss ola large world it was
said that Bishop Howton had l,cen u
show manager and that his orphan
cousin had married Il French dancer
who was in his strolling company.
This cousin hal been left to Garrick,
who had kept him down and nearly
starved him, repressing his spirit by
All avarice andsuperstition whichlay
across each other, and finally retired
Garrick from the show business a
complete failure, while his ward, set
free by matrimony, made Il nice
little fortune keeping a dancing
academy with his wife.
When the parents died something
of the husbands inherited tenets
caused him to repent. though he had
never done anything bad, and in the
weakness of dying he gave his child
to his relative to he her trustee and
the trustee Of IL respectn ble little for
tune.
The poor dancing teacher thought
the word Bishop" covered n rcgen-
erats heart.
The bishop was merely i, capitalist
in marriage fees.
This is considered reasonable hu-
mility.
Some of tho schoolboys called him
Old Yoke-finoki, because he yoEed so
many couples.
What education he had picked IN
avarice and illiterate associations
had chased out of his head, like an
old country Dutcllman, he could spell
ioists for his barn Joyce and talk
about the breeclman on his horse
when lie meant breeching.
As time advanced Gnrrick grew
deeply in love with Eunice, and for
got to give spiritual restraint to his
son.
CAT .o,.onf.,o,, .Io.,, - <>1.l E.,,:,I.