St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-03-11

O'-ANiASS NV w OuloSANCo EOU
Sired Sumner says he will explain what
the sundrles mean when we get beyond the
Iowa line.
None of us know much about trusts
except Diment, who says they are lust
like state institutions. Hompe said
that he guessed if that was so they
must be octopi. which made Diment a
little rliy. We've got card hung out
On our section of the sleeper which
reads:
All earthly trusts must surely bust:
In God is Minnesota's trust.
The porter of this car is real obliging,
Hanke gave him a cork to smell of
which came all the way from Minneapo-
lis, and the fellow was so tiekled that
he put sign up over the door:
Mad dogi
Take carel
We told him that we came from Min
nesota, in fact belonged to the legis-
lature of that state, and were going to
st. Louis to save the country from a
trust.
''For Gods sake, boss, what am a
trust?"
Pour aces out and five i'm YOUR Oh
pOnent's hand" said Fred Sumner-at
which we all felt quite relieved, for we
did not know how to answer the cues
ton. At Kenyon we were subjected to
lndIgnitieS; for sheriff came on board
searching for minister who had To-
Gated trust upon all of the married
women of town near by. AS soon as
he saw Forbes he swore that he was the
man, and to tell the truth he does look
like preacher. We swore that he was
a member of the legislature, but the
deputy said the man he wanted had
hpnn fhnrn "hnn
look troublesome, Forbes got up, said
he was Ill favor of local option, showed
his muscle, and the deputy ac-
knowledge that he was mistaken and
let us alone. HOmpe says that it seems
very strange to be so far from home.
although he thinks it would be more
lonesome if he wasn't in a prohibition
state. He thinks this would be a first
class place of refuge for Mayor Raw
son, but Hanke says it is too dry. When
we crossed the Iowa line all of us began
to feel thirsty, so we Clipped in a dol
lar. gave it to the porter and pinched
his leg. Pretty soon he came back with
a big black bottle.
docs any OBJ de gentlemens drink
the cordial of health?'
Sumner said he had ever since he
contracted consumption in the state
capitol, and the rest of us thought we
had the same disease. So the darby
passed the bottle around. and it was
very good-eSpecialiy after we saw on
the label, SD. Aberle." Tastes just
like home" said Senator Pope.
Senator Dodge had brought along a
big book entitled, ''How to Feed Calf
When Young" He says there is moth
ing so essential in this trust matter as
to know how to feed young calf with
out getting its dinner UP your sleeve,
and that if the farmers all knew this
Phil Armour and all the other monop-
Olists would soon go out of business.
We caunot tell you how thankful we
are to Gov. Merriam and the rest of the
boys for sending us OH this trip-and
paying our expenses. 1t is comfortable
to think that we won't have to hear the
chaplain pray for a week and our paw
runs on just the same. The cars are
warm and comfortable and everybody
so deferential-guess they know who
we are. Iowa is big state, we hear,
but cannot see because it is too dark.
Hompe went out OH the platform and
said that 1t looked longer than Otter
Tail county. Hanke has brought along
treatise on 1.-THE Cow" which he is
studying, so as to be able to make
speech. He says he is determined to
earn his money, for if he doesn't his
POOptO tlidb
with Jay Gould or some other blasted
monopolist. We can't decide yet what
the beef trust is, and the governor neg
lected to send the dictionary along, nor
do we know what in thunder we are
going to st. Louis for except to spend
a thousand dollars which the state
didn't know what to do with. Sumner
says he has relation in st. Louis who
is butcher, and that he will get him to
explain the subject to us. Late this
evening Senator Pope, who is going to
act as our captain, assigned the follow
ing subjects to us. which we are to look
UP as soon as we get an encyclopedia:
Hanke-The effect of trusts UPON
early June bulls.
Sumner-IS Oil inspection trust?
Finseth-The history of trusts prior
to the birth of Christ.
Forbes-Is it safe to trust in a heifer
at any time?
Hompe-Wiil trusts affect the devel-
opment of grasshoppers in Otter Tail
county?
Diment-If it had not been for trust
would We have been sent on this bust?
Dodge-ReSolutionS of thanks to the
governor and Mr.. Estes.
Pope-What are we here for?
Tomorrow we will be on the soil of
Missouri if we do not die of thirst
before then. Our expenses to date
have been:
Pinching the darky's leg 800
Cordial of Health 90
Peanuts for Hompe ... O5
Prize package for Hanke . 10