Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-24

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II ~
lARE2 to know is how to
WhlXMS make good friends,
NH6NK and how to bring it
eAtS%t1 about that our friends
4Eszk shall make us good.
,muTF+ISs He has gone q long
way toward making
the most of life, who has plenty of good
friends. Whether we make the most of life,
or the least of it., depends greatly upon
the character of our friends.
"a man that hath friends must show him
self friendly" This would be Just as true,
and would stand somewhat nearer to our
starting point if it read: A man that de-
sires to have friends must show himself
friendly. you have no friends, it is your
own fault If you have few friends, the
fault is your own. Be yourself a friend.
Show yourself friendly. Cultivate the
friendly spirit. Then you cannot help hsv-
ing friends.
IMPROVE YOURSELF.
Some one has said that the best rule for
fathers and mothers who wish their children
to grow up into gentle, cultured and Chris
tisn men and women is, improve yourself.
That is good rule for making friends. I'm
prove yourself Strive to keep kindly and
helpful temper. Do not make random and
foolish criticisms. ''Do not let familiarity
swallow up courtesy"
Be yourself such an one that your friend
ship will be worth having. Be always
watchful of an opportunity to contribute
something to the pleasure of those in whose
company you find yourself So develop
whatever graces God has given you, so store
your heart with kindly and generous i'm
pulses, and your mind with wise, interesting
and helpful thoughts, that people may find
it both pleasure and a profit to be with
you. Then you will have friends.
Just here fits in comment npon one of
the diseases of friendship. The name of it
is sensitiveness. Sensitiveness is always
misfortune. 1t is sometimes sin. 1t is a
kind of selEconsciousness And self-con-
sciousness is one of the most uncomfortable
ailments of our social life.
WORST OF THE THREE.
Grant Allen said that If it were put into
his hands to abolish out of this human life
either plague, pestilenee or self-conscIous-
ness, he would put self-consciousness out
first, as being really the cause of greater
amount of misery. In its milder form self
consciousness is an acute realization of the
possession of hands and feet and entire
ignorance as to what to do with them. In
severer phases the sufferer imagines that
every two people whom he sees talking
together are talking about him. Such self
consciousness is a misfortune, and should be
persistently fought against like stammering
or any physical defect.
Sensitiveness is sometimes sin. 1t is
then phase of selfshness. The person who
is thus sensitive puts self in between him
and his friends You cannot cultivate the
sensitive. SensitivenesS makes friendship
i'll at ease. Your friend knows perfectly
well that your imagination is on the alert
day and night to persuade you that he has
neglected, or slighted, or insulted you. He
is afraid to speak above his bteath lest he
shall hurt your tender feelings.
Make diagnosis of this disease of friend
ship and you will find that it is a very un-
pleasant disorder. 1t is partly pride. You
are thinking too much about yourself. 1t
is partly suspicion. You distrust your
friend. You are not willing to put genuine
and unhesitating confidence in him.. 1 do
not know many things which are more an
tagonistic to true friendship than very much
pride and very little faith.
FORGET YOURSELF.
1 do not know what true friendship can
be held to mean, unless it implies, at the
very least, that you forget yourself and ad-
mire and trust your friend. 1 cannot see
what friendship is good for, or how it can
deserve its honorable name, unless it leads