Morning journal and courier., 1889-06-12
DIFFICULT.

As the season advances 1t is no longer a difficult task to recognize the restaurant shortcake by it's strawberry mark.-Chicago News.
 Smith-Are you going to hire cottage at the beach this year, Joness Jones-No; I cannot afford to hire one; I'm going to buy one.-Boston Courier.
 The papers continue to speak of the "blushing brides" Flushing fiddlesticks The brides are all right. It is the fdgetty bridegroom to whom public sympathy should go.-Boston Transcript.
 A New York paper says the city hotels lose their best walters in the summer because they go to the watering places. The water ing places wonder if the best walters ever get there.-New Orleans Picayune. An advertiser in the New York Herald, in advertising for "a competent and reliable bookkeeper," specifies that ''bookkeepers who suffer from thirst caused through the smell of the ink or the dry look of the paper need not apply.-American Stationer. Fweddy Gin deep distress)-Cholly, I'm in twouble this mawning.
 Cholly-Whats the mattah, old boy? Fweddy-The stweets are all sloppy and nawsty, and cawn't woll up my twousehs ! without destroying the cwease, bah Jove!- Chicago Tribune.
 Very shabby in the old man: A Cincin- ! nati father fixed the big rocking chair in the parlor to upset if 8 greater weight than 40 | pounds rested on it. On the very first night | afterwards his daughter got broken shoul- der and her young man had his nose skinned. Detroit Free Press.
 \ Distrusted the Fisherman's Scales-"Have you got your scales with youf' said the trout \ to the sucker. 'I have" answered the sucker, "whya' "Well," said the trout; "Im going to take that fly, and I'd like to be ! weighed before leave the brook, just for my own satisfaction. ."-Puck. Plover shooting in Te1as.-Young MT. Shoosum (who has been missing the first shots, but always good with his second)- ! sfHang the luck! can't make a double shot I this morning" O'Toole (the driver)-"Phat ! yous want to kill two birruds with is a three
 barreled gun."-Texas Siftings.
 J. Pullman Porter-Well, Rastus, how's
 de worp usin' you now daysa
 Rastus-Oh, pooly, sah; deys too many ups an downs bout my bi2ness. ! J. P. P.-Shol you doan say sol What you doin' any ways
 R.-I'se runnin' de elevator up to de
 Thorndike.-Lampoon.
 | Little Jimmy visits his fathers office, and
 after examining the typewriting machine ob
 do they take those to the thsater fora" "My
 boy" replies his mother, "they do not take
 them to the theater." ''Well, it's mighty
 funny, then. Pa was tellin' MT. Nofies that ' he LOOK hls typewriter to the tnea-
 "Jsmes," said his father sternly, ''I'1l see you in the stable this evening. g."-Drake's E
 Magazine.
 One more chance-Billy Dobson, proprie
 tor of the Blue Front saloon and gambling
 house, was the first subscriber to the Kicker.
 He encouraged us and occasionally lent us
 money, and our gratitude has prevented us from drawing public attention to his den o1
 iniquitY. We can't promise to hold off much
 longer. We shall give him one more chance
 to reform the place, and if he doesn't i'm.
 prove it we shall give him three or four col
 umns per week of the hottest kind of Ian
 guage. Gratitude is all right up to certain
 limit. Beyond that an editor owes duty te
 the public. Arizona Kicker In Detroit Free | Press.