Omaha daily bee., 1889-06-10
RUN CATTLE TRAINS FOR him
What Should be Done With the
Street Gar Fiend.
SEVERAL VARIETIES OF HIM.
The Pig Who Crosses Hrs Bcgs-The
Fellow Who Spreads His Out
A Boor without any
Discretion.
,ERAL VARIETIES OF HIM.
We've all Mot ,yIm.

"Some passengers ought to charter
cars all for themselves, and tho cars
should be cattle cars" Indignantly re-
marked Manager Will j. Davis, the
other day in my hearing writes Charles
Lederer in the Chicago Herald. Mr..
Davis resides on tho North Side, and
his theatre is on West Madison street.
Having, therefore, to patronize, daily,
the public vehicles OF two divisions Of
the city, he is undoubtedly qualified to
be something Of an expert in street car
ethics. The cause of this particular
outburst of indignation was this: He
was in a North Side cable car. Opposite
him sat the semblance of a man occupy
ing the space usually allotted to three
passengers. A couple, certainly young,
and probably LOVING, entered the car.
The space on each side of the solitary
individual was all the seating capacity
not already occupied. Did the party OF
the first part move to the right or the
left in order that the couple might sit
togetherp Not bit of it. Impervious
alike to an appealing glance from the
young lady and subdued scowl from
her escort he remained rooted to his
central position. The couple seated
themselves, one on each side of him,
That was not the worst Of it, for it be.
came apparent from the conversation OF
the newcomers, which was necessarily
above whisper on account of the bru-
tai obstruction between them, that they
were to be parted for quito time.
Evidently they must make the best OF
the present opportunity. This phase OF
the situation was fully grasped by the
-, s,,t 1>N l..1N ls..l- 4
and gleed as he listened and leered"-
that sounds like quotation from some-
thing or other even If it isn't.
There was, withal, something fiepd-
ishly sympathetic about that nickel
paying, interloping auditor. When the
conversation between the two young
people was of q serious character he
looked PANIED, and even sighed once
when something very distressing was
alluded to by the blushing and con-
scious damsel. Then, when her COM
panion said something particularly
cheering and even facetious, the loutish
NAL mouth into an appreciative grin
that was simply diabolical. Little
wonder, then, that Manager Davis
should wax wroth and wonder that
some one did not stop the breed Of the
lop-eared middle man and all his liz.
Faint chance of his extinction, however. /.
He comes of prosperous and prolific
family Of the genius nuisance, and is
irrepressible and Interchangeable.
Unhappily there are too many of his
kind to kill off. To advocate wholesale
slaughter may bring one within the
pale of the law. The street car brptS
is choice lot; he Is impervious to pub
lie opinion and deems personal censure
a dainty compliment to his aggressive,
Independent American manhood.
Sometimes he crosses his legs at right
angles with the aisle of the car until
they resemble a poorly constructed
stile, on which occasion he extracts
much keen enjoyment from the FREE
quent trippings over his feet of his fell
low passengers. If expostulated with
he is won't to inquire Of him who expos
tulates: .'Sa-a-y, dyer want the
whole carp" which bright bit of repar-
tee acts as crusher.
Again, he will keep his bony legs
within bounds as far as lateral lines are
concerned, but extend them to an as-
tonishing degree in longitudinal
direction. This is his mildest form Of
nuisance-mania.
When suffering from an aggravated
attack he is apt to load himself with
select assortment of bundles and satch-
els and stack them on the seats of the
car he happens to infest. 1t requires
personal alteration with him then to
procure the removal to his lap of even
single package when the space taken
up by the latter is required by human
occupation.
He willingly suffers from asthma for
the privilege of sitting IN a sidewise po-
sition next to you and musically breath
ing down the side of your neck. And 4
,uh ha laip hi 10
naturally innocent look in his face that
plainly tells that his apparent enjoy
ment of the scenery from the car win
dow is the most pretentious of shams.