davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1889-12-12
A CANINE ARGUMENT.
An 1nssrnce Which Proves That There n
n Doe LANGUAGE.


Dog Language.
A e,a'ious sirht was Witnessed one
afternoon on the wharf at Cincinnati.
A gentlemen. accompanied by two fine
speci;.ens Of the water spaniel, went
down to the landing Of the Newport
ferry. ut the foot OF Lawrence street.
Somehow, says tho Commercial Gazette,
he became separated from the CANNES,
or rather they failed to follow him
aboard. The boat had got out in the
stream when the dogs caught sight OF
their master and discovered he was fast
leaving thcm. Standing on the edge OF
the float, both set up q vigorous yelp-
ing, which attracted the attention Of the
bystanders.
Suddenly the older and larger dog
plunged into the river and began to
swim rapidly toward the Kentucky
shore. He had gone about o hundred
yards when he seemed to become aware
that his brute companion had not fol-
lowed. Turning around, hc swan back
toward the spot where the younger
dog stood. AS he drew alongside the
float he made no effort to get aboard.
Tho two began to bark at each
othcr--to hold On animated conversation
in the dog tongue, as it were. The older
dog, as he fioated by the side of the
landing, barked encouragement to the
more timid animal, and apparently was
urging the latter to jump into the water.
Tho barking duet lasted some minutes,
and then the young dog, seemingly con-
vinced by his companions assurance,
grew bold, and suddenly bounded into
the river.
Tho first dog gave delighted yelp,
and, both turning their noses toward
Kentucky, began to swim straightacross,
side by side. Both continued to bark
until they reached the shore, and could
be heard on both sides Of the river. The
people on the ferry and the Kentucky
shore saw tho strange race, and, with
people on this side and on the bridge,
watched It to the end. The dogs landed
opposite to the barracks, where they
were awaited by their owner, who, with
several'other gentlemen, had hurriedly
walked down the bank. There was no
limit to the delight Of the two animals
as they rushed up to their master. The
river at that point is nearly half q mile
wide. The action of the dogs seemed to
indicate that they had language OF
their own, and the paternal manifesto
tions Of the elder brute were most inter.
esting to see.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1889-12-12
Cure ET,sted by q Iliss-

A good story is being told about the
wife Of prominent gentleman Of
Scranton, Pa, who has long been con-
drmed invalid. a fow weeks ago she0
took to her bod and bid fair to lie there
helpless tho rost Of her life, and there
seemed to b, little tho matter with her.
Her husband prepared novel test for,
her. He took their presty oolored serv-.
ant into his confidence and by e prear-
ranged plan tho t1o rLct II to in
valid's hca-o aauh"" y, tAe- passad
the mc1 q d a. 0,gl. crh"Aatag
the girt psi q o { wasa Ii e, o. Lar
Black SKIN. fAu w,Ies loat Y,rUars re-
turi-od to la. 40 :aoe, ~. $40 lumped
cut of her bed and drove the girl from
the house. She now does all the house,
work herself with ease.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1889-12-12
1t Ended Their Friend ndship.

81 amt nebbor gwine ter hab muffin
mo- ter do wild Pcto Willis, boss. He
flung my bran new Sunday suit out de
window t'other day" 1T didn't hurt
your suit much, did it?' mo, sab, but
1t hurt me. l happened ter be in it at
do time"
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1889-12-12

will Joy gness the heart Of dear one
opportunities holiday shoppers inspection
aen confident that with anything
ior quality and cheap Of the large city dealers.
Dress Goods
In all the latest styles, from a handsome
printed od-time calico, up to the finest import
| ed Dress Goods in wool or silk. special line
of Grosgrain Silk in coors, never sold for less
| than ST. now Is cents per yard.
Shawls.
| India, Paisley, Broche Cashmere and Wool
| in great variety including genuine French
Beaver sold at $780, now $3.50
Cloaks,
Plush, Silk and Cloth Wraps in Misses
! Ladies' and Childrens, at greatly reduced
prices
Furs,
Mufs Boas, Stoes and Fur Trimmings in
desirable styles. Some little beauties in Fur Sets
for the children
Umbrellas
Rare designs in gold and oxidzed caps for
i Ladies and Gentlemen.
i Dressed and Undressed Kid, Silk, Cashmere
1 and Lisle Thread in Ladies' and Children's
sizes.
Handkerchiefs,
i From the common Cotton to the finest Silk
! including a magnificent line of the dantiest
! Embroidered Linen Cambrcs in scaloped
| q
Silk and Cashmere Muflers
Window Draperies,
!, In and nobby effects
Lace Bed Sets,
i Spreads and Shams to match
Portieres,
Il In beautiful designs and very cheap
Table Linens,
i All grades and prices
Napkins,
Fine and common. We closing some
i extra large sizes in fine qualities, one out
side Of package, slightly soiled at one.half their
! value
Bed Spreads
i great variety, including the new counter
! pane designed for rope work See them
i In all qualities. Ask to see our Christmas
u Blankets, fine enough for Queens bed cham.
! ber.
Stamped Linen Goods,
i Throws, Scarfs, splashes, Carving Cloths,
Tray Covers and Umbrella and Slipper Cases.
Satins and Pushes
i Complete line of colors for fancy work
Knit Skirts,
In plain and striped effects
Hoods and Toboggans
Some beautiful goods closing at mere nomi-
I nal price,
Underwear,
Ladies', Misses and Gents all marked down
i to clear out
Miscellaneous.
i Lace Barbs Ruchings, Collars and Cuffs,
! Pocket Books, Chatham Bags, Card Cases. Cor
\ sets, Fascinators Tides and Silk Throws also
i elegant line of Gents Suspenders Silk and
i fine Cambria Handkerchiefs and fine Cashmere
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1889-12-12
YOU CAN'T AFFORD 1T.

We can't make happy but little udou
pended will bring aness the heart Of Owing
the magnitude stock the uniformly departments
fer extraordinary opportunities holiday We solicit inspection
confident
quality a cheap any of large city dealers
Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1889-04-30
F. C. AMSBARY, Superintendent.
eod13

numiliatea man - not humorous. Life I'M
Ter a monarchy and an aristocracy is hui
initiation, all the way from infancy 70 tho
grave. Some may deny this. But these d
not belong TO the human race ] sm tslkin,
about the hum All race.
"What / arrive Aft my premises arc
right, you uBderstand-is this: The thing
>alled American humor Is misnained; 81 has
40 patent, il Is not peculiar, IL IL mere
human humor, with the pressure lifted on.
It's chains broken, It's spirit set free. Ouiy
once in the worlds history have we seen a
aation enjoying these several things al ~
the same time, bright sky, general free
dom from the depressing bread and meat
cares Of life, and every man entitled 70 hold
his head as high as bis neighbors. The re-
suit il the only example in history Of
human humor not In q state % arrested do
SelOpment.
There 1t IL. for better, for worse, You
asked for something IA humorous vein.
hen you should have given mo a dismal
opic Anybody can get a humorous para
graph or two out Of things which are essen
Tally unhumorous, but 70 do that when the
ext Is huraor its very self. is 70 put Up q
hand which no man can call Anybody can
nix blue and yellow and make green, bat
oobody can make green out Of two yellovs.
Whose strivsth against tho laws Of God, tho
same shall get left. Traly yours,
80 Z Fr~~r
Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1889-04-30
A NEW YORKER ON WICHITA.

S. c. Beckwith, Esq, of New York, who
accompanied the New England excursion
to Dennison, Texas, arrived in this city
yesterday noon, and in spite of the rain
and slush and chill, desired to see Wichita
of which he said he had read so much. He
came up through Oklahoma and he said
it was Wichita and the EAGLE all the way
along. In company with Mr.. George
Hammann. OF this Office, he spent two or
three hours riding about the streets last
evening. On returning to the Office he de-
clared that while the day was gloomy,
Wichita was revelation and he had fall
len in love with our trees, our homes and
in fact with everything and that it was no
wonder that the whole world was talking
about Wichita. Mr.. B. left for the eaat by
the D. u. Santa Fe.
Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1889-04-30
A SUCKER KICKS.

Mr.. F. Brady, of Denver, writes gentle
man in this city that some time ago a
Wichita man induced him TO sign a sight
draft for 500 and in few days he was
very carefully given the news that he
would be called upon to pay it. He looked
for the man but could not find him, but
finally paid over the amount called for by
the once innocent paper. He says he was
very foolish in writing his name on that
occasion and he Certainly would not do it
again if he had chance, and adds that if
Mr.. - ever comes to his town he will
surely have him arrested In postscript
he says this makes four times he has been
done I'D by fellows in Kansas in that
very same way. In the answer to his
epistle he was told that he had no reason
to complain surely for he had escaped
miraculously we'll and if the per cent don't
increase on him he may get rich yet and
enjoy his Kansas acquaintance very
much
Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1889-04-30
WANT 1T QUICK.

An effort will be made at the next meet
ing of the city council TO get that body to
take another step in the Waco avenue paw
ing scheme. The petition in the posses
sion of the council has on it four-fifths of
the resident property owners on the ave
nue. from Third street to Seventeenth and
the friends of the measure are giving
special attention claiming that the move
ment has reached the home stretch and
they think it is time to work hard.
The estimate made by Mr.. Squires that
on Market street to use the asphalt paving
it would cost S134.95 per lot is thought by
some to be much lower figure than had
been generally considered on rough esti-
mates. Those interested on Market street
say they expect to wait action on Waco or
at least not to try to rush in ahead. They
of course hope to see the Waco scheme go
through, as it may pave" the way for
them
Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1889-04-30
POINTS ON THE Outside.

Mr.. Henry c. Stryker, of Minneapolis
Arrived last evening from the Pacific coast.
He has been on trip for some weeks Wis
iting all the towns and cities of promi-
nence and making his trip in the interest
of prospecting. He stated last evening
that the deadest city he was ever in is Los
Angeles. Fine buildings resulting from
the boom supplied with all the modern
Improvements Practically vacant. No
one making anything but the sign painters
who have graat run on For Rent" and
TO Let" He stopped on the corner of the
two business or formerly business streets
of the town and saw about one hundred
people sauntering along, and not q man he
says looked S though he was going any
where on business. The people keep wol-
dering when eastern money with suckers
behind it will come to their rescue. They
don't talk or seemingly think
or have any hopes of engaging in any bust
ness to make living or pay off indebted
ness, but depend solely on the chance of
sucker eastern people to buy them out
A short distance this side of La Junta
Sunday night the engine was derailed by
some cattle on the track and caused Law off
VI ScNcu HUuIS, iio OLc Ndo SoDCcTH-
ing yesterdays rain he said il rained some
in eastern Coloradosnd all western Kansas
seemed TO be getting glorious spring
wetting and all the western part of the
state he said is looking fine.
a gentleman who came from Carthage,
Mo-, yesterday, stated that il rained hard
all along the road. So i: would seem that
the entire state was greatly benefited
Yesterday.
Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1889-04-30
VALLEY CENTER TOWNSHIP.

Through the courtesy OF J. S. Morris. our
township trustee, We give our readers the
following statistical report OF Valley Cen
ter township for 1889 and we call especial
attention TO the number Of citizens who
do not pay any tax on personal property
because of the exemption law, there being
IS per cent Of the adults of this township
who pay no tax on personal property and
many of them are better able TO pay taxes
than many who do paw. There are in the
township 40 Inhabitants of which num-
her so are under 81 years of age There is
Sls,7S5 of taxable personal property OF
which s 400 Is exempt, leaving 81, SS5 &C
tualIy uolect TO taxation. here are l25
men who are entitled to exemption. There
are oSs horses. lei mules, sis mich COWS,
loo cattle. OF other kinds, l. ST. hog in
the township. There are a,l53 acres Of
corn planted, :, SIS acres of oats and 431
acres Of wheat sown, which Is a fine show
ing Of the acreage planted Mr.. Morris
has got his books up in fine shape this
spring, and very quickly, having only oe-
cupied % days at the work, something less
than week quicker than it was done last
Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1889-04-30
A SANDWICH MAN.
The Story Of His Downward Career from
an Army Position.

The Story OF His Downward Career from
an Army Position.
Among the curious incidents in Colonel
Mapleson's Memoirs" is the story of an
officer in the British army, who told the
story OF his down grade career in social Do
'ition: II was formerly" he said, "a Cap
tain in the - regiment. and many time
have paid my six guineas for box at your
opera, both In Edinburgh and London. Sub
sequently began 10 take great interest in
the turf, and soon met with heavy losses,
which compelled me to give various promis-
sorry notes. This at last came TO the knowl-
edge of my Colonel, who recommended me
10 leave the regiment without delay. Hsv-
ing nothing TO live upon and being fair
performer on the corneta- piston. l Join ed
travelling circus, and ultimately came across
your opera company in Philadelphia, where
was one OF your stage band. Later On
joined party who were bound for the dia-
nond fields in South Africa, where was
most unsuccessful, and had 20 work my
passage home in sailing ship till got TO
London, where l became supernuner-
airy under Jour management a. Dru-
~ Lane During your third season
an aunt Of mine died and found
myself the possessor Of Glo.o00 Nv cousin,
who was largely interested in building op
srations, which be assured me paid him ..
east sixty per cent, induced ne 70 place
half my fortune Ia his specuis.ions- HIS
houses were in the west part Of London,
which had been considerably overouilt, and
being Eaortgaged, they would have been
lost but for my paying away the remainder
of my fortune. with the view Of saving
them IL spite OF this the mortgage fore
closed and again became . supernuuer-
airy, when, il the mimic fight II tie seeood
act Of ''Trovatore," one Of ny companions,
By mere accident with tae poins Of spear,
pat nv ere OCT 1 was now no loo ger qval-
lied for engagement even - . supernuner-
ary, and i became sandwich man. Ny
duties during TIE last forr and half years
have been 20 parade Bond street and Re
gent street, receiving as payment rire
pence day" On ny handing the poor
man bis sAlary aad settling Up, be q, first
declined 70 take the money, saying that
bad done hin so many kindnesses AZ differ
eut periods Of his LIE that low when WAS
in trouble myself be could not think CT TAX
ing lis weeg's pay. /, however, 10, only "a
sisted upon his accepting IL b.. gave hln
sovereign for hinse.t The unfortunate
gentleman, as he showed tilself - tas
LAST went AWAY blessing &c,
Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1889-04-30
THE LARGEST ADVERTISERS.

For over a week Mr.. George G. Read,
travelling agent for II. H. Warner & Co..
of Rochester, n. Y, the largest proprie-
tory medicine house in the world, has
been In this city attending to the FIRMS
business. While here Mr.. Read placed
advertising matter, pamphlets, books,
etc, also samples of Warmers Safe Yeast,
in every private house, and visited the
grocers and druggists, procuring large
orders for Warmers Safe Cure, Warmers
Log Cabin Remedies, and Warmers Safe
Yeast. Messrs. Warner & Co.'S great sue
cess in business is due to their liberality
in advertising. and not being afraid of
using printers ink, as well as carefully
compromising all their preparations, max
ing them wholesome and positively safe
and beneficial to the consumers.
No one knows the actual value of news
paper advertising better than Messrs.
Warner & Co. They advertise in over
10, 600 newspapers in the United States, to
say nothing of their contracts in Great
Britain, Germany, Austria, India, Ans
tralia and New Zealand.
Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1889-04-30
THE COURTS.
POLICE COURT.

Cue Gillies, drunk, brought In by Obi
GERS Heusler and Brewer, was fined S..
Henry Baker and DelwuDg Been were
arrested by Officer Brewer
Lizzie Smith. for prostitution, was ar
rested by Officer Weiter; execution sus-
pended on condition she would leave the
city.
Richard Lee, arrested for using indecent
language on the street and around the de-
pot, by Officer Dunbar.
VIM. Oliver. drunk, Officer Harmon.
Alex Burch, drunk and concealed weap-
OBS, Officer Knight
r, F. Dasson, leaving team unbitched,
Officer Dennis.
JUSTICE COURT
Justice keenan, has for today, State
vs. Hines, assault and battery.
State VS. Scheaeder, disposing Of mort
gagged property.
PROBATE COURT.
First annual account and settlement of
the estate of Jabez Lumbert, deceased.
Marriage licenses Were issued 10 George
w. Gale and Ada E. Winssl. and JOHN II.
Gould and Mary Ryan
DISTRICT COURT.
Judge Reed adjourned court yesterday
until Thursday morning.
Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1889-04-30
THE CHANGE,

The decent property owners in the viciu-
ity of Five Points are greatly pleased with
the fact that the police have succeeded in
getting the vicinity quieted down. The
dens have been vacated by the gang of
robbers and all-around toughs that have
made the locality notorious for some years.
People can sleep much better within half
mile of the place and property used for le-
ultimate purposes is said to be enhanced
in value. Some of the fellows who own
he shauties and who have been collecting
enormous rents from the same, not know
ing, of course, VINO lived there, express
themselves as much disguised. Since the
change, however. one of the leading bust
ness men has been figuring on putting up
brick block for storage use on South
Fifth, near Williams street He says
since the vicinity has been made respecta-
BILE building there for legitimate pur-
poses would have chance 70 be paying
property,
Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1889-04-30
AMERICAN HUMOR:
Mark Twain's Characteristic Letter on
This Interesting Subject
cod lS9 st

At the recent meeting of an editorial as
sociation, one of the speakers, whose topic
was American Humor," read the follow
ing letter which be had received from Mark
Twain Samuel L. Clemens), In reply TO q
request for his views on the subject II il
well worth reading, and pervsded withal
by that peculiar dry humor which many
people find 80 attractive in his writings:
"Of course can not know what line you
are going to follow, but your text suggests
TO me word or two which / would Ike TO
say: II the quality of humor were lacking
in any people, one might fairly expect 70
find that lack in the American Indian, since
his grave and stole side lie so persistenIy
kept before US In accounts Of him. And
yet he Is brim full Of rude bumor, as Mr..
Parkrnan has sufficiently shown. have
superstition that humor is as much a part
Of human being as It IL OF God Himself,
who made II, enjoys il, and has exhibited
His fondness FOR it by casting examples and
expohents Of II In incredible number and
infinite variety of form-fornas whose fan
tastic animal and vegetable designs relieve
with overcoming levities the vast
gravity OF nature, and in whose long pro-
cession you fnd things TO charm and CON
tent all tastes; the artillery bug and the
squid. the insectivorous plant and the jack
ass, the kitten and the pole-cst; and along
down at the end, among the citizens In
carriages and on foot you observe Bur
cette and the monkey aud me.
''If one should ask: Why are some ns
tons so serious IL hunor has been dis
tributed in equal measure among themi
should answer with the questions: Why 10
Flashead Indians skull the shspe OF great
Cheops, Why isn't q strong bow straighti
A nations condition and its sky are tho
commission, I think, which must decide
whether the Nation huner shall be smoth-
cred or allowed 20 sing. The more sun
shine and the easier the life, the greater the
measure OF hunor that viii rise 70 the top.
The French have not had an easier life than
he In glish, but they have had . much sun
nier sky; with Engisnd's sky, the French
had been ~ serious a. are tie English.
There Is Still another factor. Do you SIP
pose an American 10 aEy more sensitive 70
humiliation than other foIksi On, 70; Irsa
are made ABOUT Aiike in shat respect TOO. A
Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1889-04-30
THIS Is A GREAT nay

At O'clock this morning the congrega-
tions and ministers of four or five of the
central Protestant churches will unite in
"A union service this morning at the First
NJ. +. church ON Lawrence avenue. At
the South Lawrence Christian, the En-
poria Avenue NJ. E church and the Re-
formed, the Olivet Congregational, the
Lincoln Street Presbyterian and the Law
renee Avenue Christian church will hold
services. At the West Side Presbyterian
the West Side Methodist will hold union
services. The character of the exercises
have not been outlined but no doubt they
will be marked by fervent patriotism
and above all with spirit of praise and
gratitude The day is kind of Fourth
of July and Thanksgiving day doubled up
in a two hundred fold force. The United
States have had one hundred and thirteen
Fourth of Julys, counting the one on which
the Declaration was signed and the inter-
esting colonial ones up to the day Wash
ington was sworn in, but the United
States with president is but 100 years old
today. Not one of all those who witnessed
the occasion which will be commemorated
today is left, yet it seems but a short time
in the history of the nations. Thousands
are living today, however. who have con-
versed with many of those who crowded
the streets of New York to see Washing
tonic see the man, to see the general, to
see the president. Three or four millions
of people have become half hundred mil
lion and more, and the narrow strip of ter
ritory confined to the Atlantic coast,
known as the United States of America,
now spreads from ocean to ocean
1t is great day.