Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1889-02-13
Fitting FOLLY.

WITH the temperance Of the sealekiu
sack comes the pungent edor Of camphor.
Ion, yo1 have come first at last: Won
! were always behind before was the queer
greeting schooimaster gave to the first
boy at school.
WHAT are you doing with my microscope,
1 Georges" i've been shaving, father: and
want to see ii there are any hairs in the
lather as yet
| How DID you contrive to cultivate such
a beautiful black eyer asked Brown.
/ ''Oa," replIed White, who had been prac.
/ tlcing upon bicycle, Il raised it from a
Slip
! Love is blind, but the doting husband can
always tell when the JOY of his heart has
mended the congressional district of bis
light gray pants with a slab of dark blue
cloth.
Observation-Disclosures old LADY IN eth
floor of hotel-''Do you know what precan.
tons the proprietor of this hotel has taken
against fre.' Porter-'.Yis. mum: he has
the house inshoored for twice wot it's
WORTH
THE young man who will call on a Young
woman and go home of his own account at
nine O'Clock may be just the sort of a Young
man that stern parents are apt to like, but
he never win be popular with the girls.
CLERK-''Mr. Brigsby, want to ask a
favor OF you" Employer-ssWell, James.
what is its" "a beloved uncle of mine is to
be buried to-day and would like to go to
the funeral" Very well James; but wait
few minutes and Wen go together. I
want to see the bali game MYSELF
Nor long ago, in a public-school exarnina-
ton, an eccentric examiner demanded:
What views wopld King Alfred take of
universal suffrage, the CONSUMPTION and
printed books if he were living noyv?' The
ingenious pupil wrote in answer: IF King
Alfred were still alive, ne would be too old
TO take any interest in any thlng.n
"PA, who was it turned the garden hose
on Reginald when he was serenading
meF' SIT was l, daughter.n Sand whv
prayF' Because Shakespeare advises it.
He says, IF music be the food of love. NAV
on and assuming Reginald,s brand of
music to be the food of love, 1 PLAYED on
played on him with the hose and a dliution
of insect powder"
A MAN with the blue badge of temperance
IN his buttonhole was addressing Sunday
school in Michigan, and put this question:
NOW, can any little boy or girl tell me why
do not drink, and why | am not a drunk
ardf' Il cam" said a little fellow. "Very
well, my boy; now speak right up so all the
children can hear; why is ita" Because
this is Prohibition townr'
Mrs. DoNovIN-"Good mornin' to yez.
Misther Murphy; sure tits an early birrud
yez are this BLESSED marn1n'" Mr.. Muir
phy-"Thrue for yez, Missis Donovin: but
us thrifle more than days job Oh have
here, so Oi SEE to mesllf DIN list shtart in
an hour betoor Oh commnce, and wirruk an
hour or so afther Oh quit, wild maybe the
Taste bit in the wirruld while OHM restin'
at noon, an so Ofll have it done betwixt
daylight an darruk.n
A HAPPY father of Buffalo, N Y. had his
first child, girl three months old, vacci
mated. by Georgel isn't that great?n he
exclaimed as he saw the doctor at work.
by Jove! why guess I'll call her by that
namel Vaccine! Why. that is girls
name, amt it! Vaccine Virus SaundersI
Capital! People will think we are descend
ed from some old Roman family. Dear
little Vacciner' The mother strongly OBJ
Jected to this appellation for her first-born.
She wanted it named Imogene, but the
father was determined and Vaccine Virus
Saunders she viii go through life