The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1889-11-09
A BITTER mlsAnrARopE.
Railway Adventures which Have Made
Genial Bob Burdette Morose.

feOple VINO nave met me on the train
say that am of all men most morose.
unsociable and unaccomodating; that
never offer to open window for any
one, never close the door after the
brakeman has gone out and taken the
end of the car and crashing noise with
him, never offer to turn a seat for two
ladies who wish to monopolize four
sittings with trip pass and scalper
ticket; never, In short, offer any OF
those little attentions to my fellow
travellers which the fresh young man
and the simple old one are so ready
and so glad to extend. plead guilty.
/ never do. will do any thing am
asked to do, if | have time, and feel
just like it. and there seems to be no
good reason why | shouldn't, but
won't volunteer to do ans thing on the
train. | used to, some; / am older
now, and know SO much less than
formerly that both my neighbors of the
road and myself get along much more
comfortably. Years and years ago
one day picked up shawl which fell
from lady's lap into the aisle of the
car. AS picked it up such miscel-
laneous assortment of articles, mostly
of an edible nature, fell out of that
shawl that was paralyzed with amaze
ment and nothing but the lurid Ian
guage of the owner brought about
the reaction that was necessary to
save my life. For the largest fee
/ ever was paid, l never afforded
u car full of people so much amuse-
ment az l did for nothing by that little
act of kindness. With the exception
of the lady whose sha wi the lunch
basket was, and myself, think every
body in the car was pleased. And
passengers in the other cars. all the
way from the smoker. and the sleepers
hearing the sounds OF mirth came into
our car and asked about it. And the
people who had the loudest and clear
to me as THAT man" or toavoid tautol-
ogy, as the story had to be repeated
many times in the course of 145 miles,
"that fellow" or "that chap" or
THAT man sittin' there" sawed
wood very conscientiously for long
time after that, but on another evil
day l entertained another travelling
audience by tugging at a car window
which had never been opened since the
car was built. | wore u porous plaster
on the plinth of my spinal column for
a couple of weeks, and reformed again.
oil Il a.
tablets of memory, and engraved them
with pen of iron on my heart. 1 also
made up my mind that l would en-
deavor TO remember them.
Well. week or two since / was
laundering along through the miles of
exquisite landscape gardening that
mark the suburbs of Philadelphia. A
young gentleman sitting just in front
of me left the train at a local station,
and just as we started again, half a |
out upon the startled air: .Oh! Oh! |
Oh! That-young- -has-left-his-um-
brella! Oh! He'll-never-see-it-again!
Call-him-quicl -throw-it. QUITO
HIM do-do- do throw that young man.
And as they pointed at
the young man and shrieked at me, l
hastily raised the window, the powers
of darkness assisting me, yelled at the
young man, hurled the umbrella at
him like Il javelin, and we were gone.
In about two minutes young man
two stories and a mansard taller than
any member of my whole family. came
down the aisle Of that car with dark
ened brow, and looked long and earn
estly into the vacant seat whence / had
just fired a silk umbrella with q ham
nered silver head. He looked under
he seat and then he looked into the
'ack. Then he looked at me. didn't
ook up, but | felt his eyes go clear
through me, as | gazed fixedly out of
he window and tried hard to think of
he form of prayer TO be used for a
nan who expects to spend the rest of
he winter in the hospital. Before
could remember it the athletic
ooking stranger said kindly. but very
irmly: 81 left an umbrella in this seat
/ few minutes ago." For one moment
he ghastilest silence you ever heard
ettled down on that car and then
hose shrieking women giggled. as
bough it was light thing to die when
'ou had return ticket in your pocket
hat would be wasted. l tried to tell
he stranger that the young man who
vas sitting in the seat took it with him,
nut thought that had done enough
and folly for one trip.
wned up and told him the truth. He
vas a magnanimous man, and he
pared me. But it was a moment OF
gony. and to-day there are white
airs on the back of my head that |
ever saw before, and never pass
trough Merton station without a {
hudder. And l never again will offer {
D extend the slightest helpful courtesy 6
D a stranger. No; if the train should J
imp of bridge 1000 feet high into |
ataract fiercer than 10000 Nigaras | I
couldn't offer to hold lone woman's 7
ably and get her hand bag out of the $
ack for her, while she put on her ;
ossamer and hunted for her lost |
heck in case she should want her
aggage when we got to the bottom.
urdette, in Brooklyn Eagle.
Wine at S2.ooo.ooo a Bottle. :
1