davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

- @~-&4 &%&&<
Thcre = ~ ckSorfa lness a the var Il eslnr
parsnls - tEst sfor4ea ey the a4iy hfe q
. lsrss f@Ally sass E.rpsrs h~zsr There
sass be e. eze@l smouEs of hspplaess in =
sa.u iesal.y. there aass be aspsa 81 bl,s
~hsrs cay twe sFs sogeahsr u watch tAs
lie lised ~ to1 "a > aozcn oeGla efar1 a.
idea, s4t foE tAs e1eer II ssrla3 lUtcrNs.s.
81 uvely ve.oaa, ~ go-ar s1d cagaiag. q
sons snc s2sasef, - lasslag nE1res, ~ ths
sense u acti.su and i.le. what oan lse desired
better than laHiiiy sehsre f-sAef ana
nothsr aDd eranasaather, s0nlR sal ell-
1roa, ulAAs the Feun1 aozcni H. 4 sss..l
f2mlly a = aiolit - keep ap the wiee "a
tersst "a people ans pc.gt oQrnoo1 WHOA
does great deal l. prolE-<s cAecrfu.aess,
u is elnnoeu - keep up suc1 lntertst ia
mere than a very lev, from Tie l1srs
Wsnt 81 tine. iron tie csnho4itg 81 setting
abo0L asa he iInpossi 0lllty 81 bclDk lA
mere Than ost place a. : time. II frsm 40
other re.-son. bat wAere there are naia-
Der q people uaaeT the resi- that enswers
every purpose. "a esct one rriugi2s Ia Aeca
fooling for tAe .rsirs II several olherk. siae
n hole together TaAlGtatu = vice ana deep
connection from which cheorfaluess is pre-
clptaged AXE sat fron its component
sssos
b4L apart from tie cheer derived from
intercourse aud relationship via tac aat-
eide nulutgcs ~ means - large fRmlss
varied scQl4i tEEoe. c0mes thai derived
from other SOURCES in coEsee uoDoe ~ oar
f41 c. rClo- THIS a. enbef cf TIE larGc house
hold IS the one devoted q charity al she
ret ( Q = great deal % Vlcarious charity. as
Ne may CAL b.. through that chsnuel, aud
feel content sSlth s@tls ned cansC4cuCcs ia q
sense q duty done which sense, whether
Il contributes 20 virtue or not does. az any
rate. 70 chceTfLlness. ano IL - cbocrf 0lufss
Of whloh We are speaking Ihls o.her NOM
her is the student cf science. anG olt az tAe
chance conversation, The books. plates. ex-
peflments aad experiences - this IN
dividuai, the rest hive a suffcieni amount -
scientific honey for their own uses. % are
enriched with learning without the least
exertlon Of their own. receiving a. as IL
were, through the pores. These others
again, DO tie gay society business; nn1
those of the remainder WHO are quietly IN
clised 20 20 all tue roDts snc drives ard
sal.s IN the CAV ones enjoymeut. See Whist
the bellies wear and how she besox behave.
aud never have 90 leave their tranquil cor
per al az Aud this last one, with scraps
of singing and scraps of piano playing and
mornings of pract4c.ng and evenings %
mirth, welos every thing together ia a sort
% perpetual ringing of Joy bells. Ia short
IN s large "a Elily the whole worlc oomo< 70
every member Of II. and in q email family
only q narrow segment CT II can come
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31
BIG STREET-CAR DEAL.

All tho Lines OF Dss Moines Pass Under
One Control - Electricity for Motive
Power.
DEs MoISss, Ia, Aug. 3o.-A street-car
deal Of large Importance was closed here
Thursday by whioh all the strees-car lines
OF the city pass into one control. The
electric street railway il sold for $3.50. go.
The narrow-gauge horss-c r line reverts u
It's original owner. DR.. Turner. by fore
closure OF mortgage. and the East steam
motor also goes into the trust Tho value
OF the consolidated property is estimated at
$50 0c0 and the chief members OF ths syn
dicate are T. J. Polk, Or. glurner, I. i
Brown and G r. Catch ali Of this city. IL
IS expected that electricity will bs intro
duced on nearly ali Of the system
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31
THE RARRlSTERS.
Important subjects Discussed at the Meet
ing Of the American Bnr Association In

CaicAoo, aug 3o-The American Bar As
soclaron ~ - meeting on Ihsz day con-
sid8red tho question II recon ending 10
Congress the necessity Of ndcprHg some
measure ~ relieve the ledcfs. crlrts It
was finally decided 10 ask Congress tor re-
nef. leau z that body 20 Cets mine the
best way o. accomplishing H. President
Field appointed a committee Of ten 10 Al
range r0r the centennial anniversary OF
the establishment o. the United States Su-
preme Court The association then ad-
iourned and tho members left at o clock
on an excursion over the Illinois Central
railroad 10 Pullman
At the evening ses ion the question of
bankrupt Law vas discussed and a resolu-
tion adopted authorizing tho comm!stse ON
commercial law 10 present the matter TO
Congress
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

A. Aibsrv cfi rrFfoot fnrs1sF whe
esile5 tbs otter night fer hsf iover vuo rad
srrset = cru,e 81 soorf thetsros hour g. 30
o. bsst mar 81 = n toned s'rpe1rert
ne b1rr ~ v-ts c1eE ~fftet nre isl fae
voure lazy svvsr wh.ls ts % w~rt if ~
rot - tsass Their fke vcunF r,sr care
arc bBrgiay ~ pret~n8ea r. - 80 Trr r
lsdT sn5 feilo~ef hiTn OF it< tns rtf
wtst pa pocsefs fgN - piarfer HnfF
psssse urdrr rrf SIC - is~sr vss &c
rgs~~f - fnd tsrt tls esrrr1psr lar vess usnr
rro1s1iT tns snrrT "a. 30 - ths glrL Tf.s
~onrs r1ao sorordiusy eeonu.p-c thelt
fte ss-.e t.Te tas Firi cisuvrsrsf heF rr
tsFs sn1 sss rs-srrsc ~ tes tcDss Sc
rzs fceet ic tar-rsftT rsp~-tstt rioos
~ 80 socrst~r tns r~rt psoyrirf Fe.s
$3.50 snsta-r s~rr - trs vounF uiar's r1f
- nIse~-re~s ~ rxustsf ~ 81 - razrreS
r--rrfrr sa Frr~rafs
~ p-ses.-s ~ f~sstitf et f1ssrsls j. ftf1
n vogg. q LaScssbe7. Fs
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31
SPECULATION THE CAUSE

An Iowa Bank Fails because Its Gus
TONERS Discovered That the Cashier
Was Buying Heavily of Land. stock.
Etc.-Liabilltie of About eIoO 900.
DEs MoISEs. Ia, Aug. Sl-The Citizens
Bank OF Prairie City. Jasper County. has
failed, with liabilities estimated at from
81. .OoO TO tlOO.OOO The assets are claimed
to be above the latter sum The failure is
attributed TO the insolvency or J.
b. Roach, who was for fourteen
years the banks cashier, and who
failed about ten days ago For
several years ho has been speculating in
land, stock aud merchandise, and had
drawn on the bank so heavily that when il
became known the depositors began 10
withdraw 80 rapidly the bank was com
pelled TO close
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

SHuDYvILLE, Ind, Aug. 30. - Michael
possey, Democratic treasurer OF this
Shelby county. confessed to his attorneys.
Adams and Hord, that he was short s13. coo
In his accounts Judge HoTd has notified
bis bondsmsn OF the fact and they will
taks action. Po.sey states that he used
the money % pay OF private debss which
we're the result OF ill-health and heavy
campaign expenses He viii turn over
several thousand dollars worth Of prop
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

:. FreEE1. sress4r~f e a L.ero- As~ ga
q u<zSr1. ! AssaFsls -l4e2es44 = q Aseks
ssssSsr.e sa4xe4 - r u .@f 49, 3s4Es Ga
asa ~.pSf = aea4sss - t'usls IA fa1tle1. 4.
q Hs1t Goa 81 .ss.o4eF oi AErse-A1or< b
E1k1sst. EasasaE4s IomL i4sl41er, " A
Pres -. h-t-rss - Nc442-zss seTfA ?. r.
s4fkaL ! a E4lsy sAa fs4sf S4sasrsI Ne9s
bsl q Co4sFsss. a4s~4 sA~-sa A-zsA~- - "
NAlatA
kssAAkcx r. Aux 81 ~t1ovsrDor ne4s
lstts Azs 4ssle1 . FIoclSE22tlQn ealing A.
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31
TEN THOUSAND DIED.

Enormous Loss cf Lie by Recent Floods
in japan 10000 Survivors Homeless.
LoSDnS. Aug. 30 o--Advices from Yokohama
state that eisastIous storms have recently
occurred in Whkayama Ten Thousand
persons perlshed IN the floods following
20 storms and 2e,os0 were rendered home
.oss. Tie less OF property ~-ss enormous
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31
GRANTS REMAINS.
rhey VIII Not BE Removed from the Tomb
at Riyerside.

at Riverside.
NEW YORK, Aug. 30-The Suns Long
Branch n j. special says; George ".
Childs told reporter that he was con adent
that General Grants body would not be
removed from the tomb st Riverside Park
As 20 the story that Mrs. Grant would con-
sent to tee removal Mr. Childs said:
II rccc.Vs letters constantly rom Mre.
SranL reoo we'd one tbs wee she has
aevog mentioned any thing about tho removal
- her husbands BODY - The cemetery at
Arlrston. II she favored tao removal OF the
sody / should have heard OF IL TIE body can
cot bo removed TO Arlington without the ccns
sent ot Mrs. ant and I DO not believe that
lie viii ever consent 10 it
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31
The SHAW ESTATE.

The Holdings Of the Late ~. Loeis Phi
lanthropist Valued At Upward of %, oo0.-
oeo-hi.sourrs Metropolis Likely to Rs-
ceive tho Bulk OF IT.
ST LouIs. Ang. 3o-Tho will OF Henry
Shaw Is now deposited In his private vault
where it was seen Wednesday by his age nts
and administratorA Tho shaw estate L.
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31
HEyrr gHAv.

sstirnated at 81. 500 600 upward, but den-
mite rgures are not yet known IL is said
that the entire estate has been left in va
Tious forms 10 the city OF a. Jouis. with
the exception of q few minor and inslg
nihcant bequcsts Tho administering OF tte
estate has been left in the hnnds Of a beard
OF administrators The Episcopal Orphans
Home and one or two charities have been
remembered
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

AvRosa. I'll. Avg - Tas village of Pig
Rock twelve n lss west = this city. vss
visit by destructive sre. which swept
awsv the entire business portion. inciuf-
ing Dr Harris drug store Norris Jones
grocery and L Vests implement sters.
together wf.s their contsnts he post
oScs wss located IN Tssts store ard 80
entire mail matter rss Destroyed Iss
loss can rot be sstimatsd "a y-t
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31
Assasainated.

NEw ORLrASs. Aug. -. A special TO the
Times Democrat from Sstartis Miss. says:
J NJ NsWbsksr was assassinsted Wednes-
dav night about o'clock "a he was enter
ing his house. He was riddled wish bullets
Newoaker was prominent politician and
a candidate for the Legislative nomination
at the last county convention An attempt
vas made about year ago 20 assass.Aate
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

MASON Gloh. Aug 81 -Flre Wednesday,
CT midnigh; destroyed eighteen s,oiea and
5weiiings burning the eulire wcst portion
of the business section O.; tia village of
Dansvili. There was no Ere apparatus ia
the town ana The Ere spresd Tsr diT re
fore brisk breeze The lo+scs Aggregated
ss0 600 with Its's insurnnc.
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31
TataI Jesfousy.

yTES%,. Aug 81 - Yrs-z Fernbach. n
millionaire and a wcl-known ct.gsn 81
Vienna killed bis wife ThuTsdav and t5en
made an Unsuccessful attempt npon ~
own ife He nov lies IN a critic. condi-
ton Terbbsoh IA said 20 have beer '-a,0Bs
- hIa rffe
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

a Wedding Ceremony psrformsd In an
Air-ship at nsnch..ter. n. II

ktrcEEsTER. y Il. Aug 70 In the
presence OF q. 100 peoDle Miss Addie Brooks
and Sir. James ;. BOYD were united in
marriage Thursday sft>rnoon The
nuptial knot was tied with the coupi.
standing within white -drsped car at
t,ched 10 a mammoth bsiloon christersd
GLORY Of the Skies" Iumedisr~
" on the completion Of the mar
risgs ceremony Ny and Mr., BOYD b-gan
their marriage nfs. far from the nsocine
crowd hy voyage among the clouds
The kanehest~r Driving Park vss IN.
scene Of THE most unique Wedding aud
the affair formed the great event ef the
New Hanrshirs STATE far for lssa
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

BERLTS. Aug. 30 -Ths Emperor William
= Al interview with member os
ths PFovincikl Council said that existing
avs for ths protection Of laoorers in
Prussia wsrs depiorsbly .usunicient n pro-
tsct them sgaisss ta- fnordinats greed OF
their -mn'oyrrS Reform. he said, was
.L-.Ir nh rrssarF
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31
nrany victims of Kerosene

DKSvER. Col. Aug. So-At soprls. small
mining camp south OF here, Thursday night
n s-year old daughter Of James Dsnochy
started 70 kindle s. fre with coal oil Tbs
an exploded. burning The girl to death
and fatally burning the IN. ther. who al
tempted 20 save her child This makes ~
teen lives lost In this State during the psst
month by the explosion Of Kerosene oil
cans
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

Iovnox Auz a. NJ Rie-itz The oorre
rDordsns % ths Times n Paris, teiezraphs
sa he p1per rhzt he Is confident General
RoulsnFsr ril return 20 France before tas
sections, which tske p ace next month
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

Pozr1ASD. Ore. Aug 80 - The Ore
xonian's special from Tacoma ". T., says:
Fire about to. Is yesterday morning In the
Deuber lodging house. a frame building
originally blilt for 9 skating rink. caused
a. aggrezats less OF about SEQ. 900 70
knapp. Burreli 4 Co r Latham h Co. and
Robertson 4 Co. occupants Of ths lower
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

Fersrtic Ds1gsfer Ho.ner. - rust
a. nit ~ Da<Iels-ts - . risIns vnunf rns-
co lady H1mzt ! ssv hfu s'ftinT
r c~rwreS strsef--sF ths ,fner a.
~heT pocr "a ~rrsr eresrso. s-<
p. c1st rase Az test ns-sc~1 ~ 7.
Nes
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31
TOWERS VAST ESTATE.
The Late Phuadeiphis Milion.lrs Mine
Operator Leaves Property Worth s2o.-
ooo o00

PHILADELPHIA. Aug % An inventory OF
the personal effects OF the late Charlemagns
Tower. ths millionaire mine operator, con
sisting OF stocks and bonds and personal
property on farms and in store houses at
watervills, y 7, was tlsd With the regis
ter OF wills Thursday. The appraise nent
places the valuation OF the persona effects
a. o. &ei. on. and it Il estimated that the
real estate held by the decedeut which
consists mainly o; mining property ia th
state and in Western lands. will reach rear
lvsf5 n03 O.0
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31
THE SEAL FISHERIES
A Business That Employs Twenty vssseh
and 45O Men

WASHINGTON, Aug 81. -Consul Stevens. o.
Victoria Is c. in his report TO tue State
Department saTs there are over twenty
vessels employing 40 men and valued a.
about sl25. O1o. engaged in hunting fur seal
They operate In tie northern waters a. Tar
as Behring sea from Nay 20 sept mbsr. and
IN waters farther south from January 70
Nay Tas totsi catch in 1888 was about
e.. 10. of which i5 90 wers from Bshring
sea. valued az about sl0o0sa uadrssssd. or
$500 Oo0 when dressed and dried.
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

szlreHaI. A1r g. - ssriss - -
rhoons ruprsced snt~d IN tesir fUr- sbd
destTuctsvensss have swept ever sspts
sud part o. China Ths esnsr. - prop
ertv is FuoaioulshIs sse TIE iev.sf est
r1s's o. ths ioss of lie by drowHtnx pisoss
n A. Co
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

E,r.as CITY. No. Aug 20 IN. works oi
the Kansas Ctv MT and Bolt Company si
Sheffield snb1rb O. nsns CITY. vsrs
burned Tkrrsdsv night Lose flso9o 7hs
er. -~1s undo btedly ~ inesn6iarv oTfsin
Two snploves who were dlschsffse -
Gently ere saspscted q the crime
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

baltimore Md. fuE - The Wsrn-
f,ctursrs' Record Favs he Eutrstvfils
ron works ard e. o. seres % ti~r~I snd
-fnsral lends sitas'e1 nssT Jouesboro.
Isnn ksvs zen 'ols n Kngiitfmsn for
go oo9 Il b. been cot q blast fncs
-
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

CEARr EsroV. " IA. Aug 20 John
Turnsr. Negro who sho- and Killed Char e
WaIker. At Rusa Eun. Fsyetss County. In
Talv. rss taken from the Fa7sttevilis jail
So Thursday night aud iJnched by mob
y aInnL ~ rl.-rara
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

Rrxo Nev. Ang - The tag. from 81
~au ~hieh srrives ThnTs6sv night ~as
.-opred tys hf9AwsTmsn sas robtst of
wsHs FsTxs \ Cos tressur. box Ihs
rohher ssosp-d Ths smonnt ssksa 10 nor
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

o.4.-v-sa j. sax ~ a eispss1f =.
~.i~.< ssr. ssv. 90 1ssasa ss.t sfs7"
-srx 70 tsis eorrtT ~s ft-tes
-lSat rs1vsg acc 1sr1 s<sS DsA
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

ovrpcrsts Kicb tps - -Ths ssv-Erfh
- srritk 4 pay nssr kers vss tetsliT a.
sfrrv.e ~ Ere TtsrszsT Th. isss 70 pises1
a. from a. 90 20 - 80 partially insured
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

yz~rosr. p L. Aaz ?, On Tsur.dsY
rs-rzs Kerr - chazpiou tsnuis pisT.r
~ ne ar5 detected Ten F.rtit - Arrr-
icsn pref .ssI5ssl thrss slrsiFht gszss-
a. s. 81
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

H.r-roFD. Conn tuf - On Thur.-
6sv Johnrton drf~sn ~ Bu1f Debls
PACED ~ is in ? "a hslf-seeer1 -
p r6 fis rscerd whies wss made - On.
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

A1u1ais-ersG - Vstsrans 90 Pea.
sL-a C1E14zl z4icasr I41usc
IEg CsaFl2lLS PoICT nDoRSE0


ar....... a. -.
A - t---st@f pisf1
rs =. $3.50 = 80 tA- .A-+ s-r~-a FiaeAi
t--+ SIS --- e --a-1-s tsf -4S sl.f-ii8
4a-- s.- 4'4-s1 II de-see i rsElef.
~ as4aAt I..a 4-assa So tsol .s1sasTal
Ia fAiceFs. tt As1lll4T. Chaplain.
a.4 E.uf4ss Loss1t I4a.af KIce. Com
sa.a4.-
n.f If.-- -~......,s ~, .a.. f,,s-
. ...f 49,. 49,
- -
s-.. ~
.-- - . - a..
~. .-..-
..- .--.., ..-.... '.--
..--. ----.-
~,
.s..-. s -. 4. -
..r - 4. ~. -s-... .--.. -
-....-.-. e.-.-... '-.---..-- ~.
.......- ~. ...-..', 49,. So -
-. -'... -.- y. -. -. ,...-. -,
-. -
--.'t' % so Hf ~ @~
- a-l ga. tiAa- - .L-'isi-is pl = t9--.-A ot
tls press pea aa 1.--li co-l-e-
ArnI4lse .sst1 t-a resolution. ouI
Gaaaf.. 84rala 81 Nsa iork. eas qu5ck-
~ 4ran aI, f... 49, = sltstllass dee.1r-
a. .-.s ..r .fr T. .... I.- a. fts tats-tts ~ A.,
.. ....-...s $780,,
+ . =. ,.. r.-,,....
i. -.
-
sdpt = fo Ae AZ .t --e aoi 'lris "iA stl.ot'
81 -4a country -D.- aAe Ass a-l'"s1 10
Fu4f es--t E.aTer tl41 com a4i-tco
sl84.d bs 4en..a aG-d % tlsesl gate tie
vsrrfa... II ras PsaaIca Onss
An suluatst alseassien of three hours
Telegram-herald., 1889-08-31

n p-sesi-s ~ f-sstisr ,t f1ssrsls j. 81
n v9gg. q LzBcssteT. Ps
Morning journal and courier., 1889-10-19
MfsceII IIanerns.

Properly adjusted, every person with Her
MIA, or Rupture, may be made safe and
comfortable, and often
Morning journal and courier., 1889-10-19
A NEWTOWN TRICK.

Newtown in this State has suddenly be-
come conspicuous, and not in very credita-
BILE way. The Democratic majority in that
town is larger than the entire Republican
vote, and SO by dividing their vote in all
cases where the law intends to give minority
representation they elected all the officers,
giving the Republicans none. The boards of
selectmen. assessors, registrars of voters,
ETC., where the law provides for represen-
tation of the minority party. were thus all
secured by the Democrats, and not Repub-
lican official was chosen In the whole town.
The law Is intended to secure for the minori-
ty party q representation on all the boards to
which it applies, bat it does not specify that
no more than two members shall be of the
same party, but simply limits the voter to
voting for not more than two persons. But,
as has been said, the Democrats having a
majority larger than the entire Republican
vote, were able to elect the majority candi-
majority members to vote for a third candi-
date to elect the minority candidate also,
thus nullifying the law and defeating it's in
tent.
Probably the Democrats of Newtown con-
slider this very smart performance, but we
should not think there was enough to gain
by 1t to make 1t pay. OF course when the
law was made nobody thought of the New
town Democrats, but it will probably be so
fixed by the next legislature that even they
cannot evade it,
Morning journal and courier., 1889-10-19

he sued for prospective and implied dam
ages from the adverse prayers and direct
damages from the assault. After hearing
many witnesses the court fixed fine sufi-
eient to carry costs, and the young man
promises not to pay for any prayers.
Andrew J. Geiger, who died lately in
Philadelphia, leaving an estate Of $3.50, 900,
directed that an obelisk should be erected
over his grave which, besides the usual NOR
tuary inscription, should bear several others.
The north panel will bear the inscription:
''Travelea 10000 miles in America. Europe,
Asia and Africa" The south panel is to
read: "Young man, stop and think. See
what has been the reward for honesty, in
dustry and economy. In 1910 worked on
Robert Martins farm near Jersey shore for
25 cents day. No fortune left to me-"
The west panel will say: "Lived and died
in the faith of the immutable and unchange-
able and natures God. Believed In the gos-
pei of peace, right and Justice"
Morning journal and courier., 1889-10-19
saturday, october 10, 1859.
THE LATEST INSURANCE.


One of the most singular companies that
have lately been formed is that which has
been organized in New York for the purpose
of burying anybody who shall, during his
life, deposit with it money to pay for the
burial. All the money deposited will be
expended in the burial, and the company is
supposed to make its profit, if it makes it
honestly, by the interests from the invest
wents of the funds deposited.
Things are now 80 arranged that man
can get insured against almost anything.
He can be insured against loss by fire. He
can be insured against the loss which he
would bring upon his family by dying. He
can be insured against loss Of time and earns
ing capacity if he happens to meet with an
accident. He can be insured against loss by
shipYreck. He can be insured against loss
by the dishonesty of an employe. And this
new company will insure him against the
danger of figuring as the chief object in q
pauper's funeral. It will be interesting to
see how successful the new company is. 1t
is probable that there is field for it. There
are great many people who would consider
money we'll invested which would insure
them decent burial. And there are many
whose experience in this vale of tears has
been such as to make them more willing to
trust a company to bury them as they want
to be buried than to trust their friends or
relatives to do it.
Morning journal and courier., 1889-10-19

can be endured It It doesn't rain every day.
lumbia have decided that they will issue no
liquor licenses to women. They think q
woman should not keep rum shop under
any conditions. And they are quite right
ohork ~
Morning journal and courier., 1889-10-19
CHANCES.

First tramp-"Down with whisky 10 Whist
say. Don't you say 80, pardnerT Second
tramp-"rve allus set my face agin 1t when-
ever had the chance."-Tsrre Haute Ex-
press.
Some one asked an old lady about seq
mon: "Could You remember iti" "Remena-
Der iti La, no; the minister couldn't remem-
ber It himself. He had to have 1t written
down" n."-Christian Advocate.
Minister-How do you know, my little
son, when Sunday comes arounda Young
America-Give me an easier one Do you
suppose don't know when We have pork
and beans for breakfasts-Boston Gazette.
'sBoss," said an old darkey yesterday,
"what's all dis heah bout race preblemT
When it was explained to him he walked
away msttering: 'sAn' Use bin er thinkin' all
erlong it wuz sumpin' ter eat."-Rome (Ga)
Tribune.
"Can't you stay little while longeri"
asked the criminal as his kind friend was
abeut to leave. 'tNo, Bob, haven't time to-
day." "Well," said Bob, stake some of
mine, I've got ten years more than I want
here."-Life.
Liberal indeed-"You are giving your son
liberal education, understand, Mr.. Spar
rowgrass," remarked the pastor. ST should
just think sc, !" replied Farmer Sparrowgrass;
'shis first year at college cost me an even
PcVVs -AAAASs
''Talk about Observation-Disclosures" said .
citizen to-day, why, when I was q boy !
worked for man who was 80 absent minded
that he discharged me three times In one week
and paid me weeks wages each time."-
Kingston Freeman.
Jones, a chronic bore, telling about an acci
dent in which q man was drowned, said: "It
happened In less time than take to tell II. )"
'I guess so; otherwise the man might have
been rescued, replied a disgusted listener,
yawning.-Texas Siftings.
Mr.. Smart (as the church-goers pass)-"rm
surprised that Miss Sweet permits Bodworth
to accompany her. He's about the freshest
young fellow I know" Mrs. Smart-"Per-
haps that's the reason she let's him carry her
Psalter. Boston Times.
Ethel-Don't you think Charlie Desmond a
tremendously nice young mani Clara-Yes,
if he didn't dress with such awfully poor
taste. ST hadn't noticed It," "Why, he
carries the same cane in the afternoon that
he does in the morningI"-Time.
First burglar (keeping watch at the back
window)-"Wot's the matter, Bills Any o.
the family awakes" Second burglar with
extreme disgust) t)-"Nawl Somebody's been
yers ahead Of us. Fust thing found wuz q
children. Chicago Tribune.
A slip of the tongue: Mamma-"Why,
Harry St. Clair. You naughty, naughty boyl
I heard you tell your little brother just now
| that you'd knock him into the middle Of
next week. If he didn't sit over on the sofa.
What do you mean by using such languagef'
! Harry-'I-I-er-Ime meant to say please sit
| over but my tongue slipped. Time.
In small town in Baden minister closed
his sermon the other day with these words:
| 'We would be pleased, moreover, to have
the young man whe is now standing outside
| the door come in and make certain whether
she Ia here or not. That would be great
deal better than opening the door half an
| inch and exposing the people in the last row
Of seats to draught." "-Frankfurter Zei-
tunp