San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1889-09-07
MUST FIT COMFORTABLY.
HATS AND coNscIENcEs MUST SIT
WELL. ON THE WEkRER.
The Matchmaker Was a Fine Mechanic,
but He Couldn't Put Burdette's Hat on
Right-It Is Just as Difficult for One

but He Couldn't Put Burdette's Hat on
Right-It Is Just as Difficult for One
Man to Fit Another Out with Conscience.
My son, one day stood at a work bench,
looking at friend who was putting a watch
together The delicate bits of machinery
that he adjusted and set in place, tiny screws
| scarce could see as they lay on his table,
delicate springs, fairy like wheels, that SEEM
ed all too dainty for anything but ornament;
the work which he did so deftly was little less
than a miracle to me- l said to him: 81 see
you have some artificial eyes in the window;
you could make a real eye, that could see, if
q man preferred it to a glass one, couldn't
your But the matchmaker only laughed
and said: No; that was little beyond him."
But | don't know. my boy; | don't know. AS
looked at him putting that watch together,
and especially after he told me that he could
make watch, had an idea that he could
make human eye if he gave his whole mind
to it.
By and by he said, Come this is enough
for one day; let's go out and hear McQuaid
call of for baseball cotillon." He caught
up my hat and slapped it on my head. That
isn't right" | said. He laughed and djusted
it more carefully. "How's that" 1t wasn't
right again, SO put it on myself, showed MIN
how wore it, and, after examining its posi-
ton closely, he took it off and tried to read
Just it. He tried it over and over for five
minutes, and then gave it up. He could
make watch, he could adjust the most deli
cate arrangement of mechanism the human
eye can see and do it accurately, SO the watch
would keep time for years, but he couldn't
put a soft felt hat, only worth dollar, on my
careless head, just as always wear it, or as
want it, for / am not sure that man ever
wears his hat twice in the same position.
THEY NEVER FIT.
lis something no man can do for another
put his hat on for him Mothers fondly
think they can put their boys hats on for
them, but it is feat that has never been per-
formed There is always final touch, just
a mere shadow of a touch, not much more
than gesture, may be, a shake of the head,
a some sort of motion that adjusts things,
settles hat and head into perfect and com
Portable relations with each other, which the
man must make for himself You can't put
another mans hat on for him and do it right.
Now, my boy, once in a while man comes
to me who can't put my hat on for me, but
who essays, with sublime confidence to fit
living, of doing, of speaking and thinking.
He picks up my conscience, turns it around
with the bow on the wrong side, straightens
out the brim, smoOthes out the crease or the
dent that l always wear in it, sets it straight
across the back of my neck, so to speak,
holds it tight while he pulls the front of it so
far down over my eyes that my ears stand
out like lateen sails, slaps it down hard on
tp,a Of o,,I
He can't put on my hat, he admits that,
but he willard thinks he can-adiust my
conscience Sometimes wear it as this we'll
meaning friend wishes me to, but it never
fits; am always a little uneasy with it that
way: am always nervously afraid that it
will blow off, and man chasing around after
his conscience in gale of wind is a spectacle
at once undignifed, pitiful and heartrendlng.
Now, my boy, perhaps my friends way of
wearing his hat is the correct thing; do not
know. But it frets me, it inks me as we walk
along the street to have him continually polk
ing at my hat to make it set on my head just
as his does on his own And when am sure
that he is not looking at me | shake my head
lightly-ah, she settles; she lays herself right
in the leads and feels as easy as quiet con-
science right away.
seemeth grievouS, | admit; but | am willing
to receive it. If hang my hat on my ear
am willing to have friendly hand place it
on my head, and | will wear it there; but |
am going to give it the final adjusting shake
or touch myself If | tilt it over my ewes
and balance it on my nose, | will tilt it back
when my attention is called to it, but will
push it back just where | want it, not where
The other man wants it. Mad enough he
would be if | took hold of his hard, stiff hat.
which he wears straight across his brows-
and very becoming the style is to his peculiar
type of beauty-and tilted it over, Just a
little out of line, as prefer to wear mine.
Fortunate would be if he didn't snatch it off
his head and smite me resembling thump
with it before he replaced it.
THE ETERNAL FITNESS.
Finally, my son-for the weather Is warm
and omit I'm conclusion, ""but again. AN
other thought" and ''one word more"-the
purpose for which your hat is designed is to
cover your head; to protect your brain tank
from the heat of the sun and the warp of the
drought, from the pelting hail and the driv-
ing rain That dc, therefore Not every
man can stand it to wear hard felt hat
pulled far down straight across the brow,
when the thermometer marks 80 in the shade.
You know how to wear a hat and what kind
of a hat to wear. You wouldn't wear Buff
falo Bill sOmbrero to ctRrch, and you
wouldn't go fishing or into the surf in
high, slick, shiny silk hat. You know how to
cultivate a good conscience. "Do mean that
fellow should have an adjustable conscience
not he Ol, 70 h.