The Globe-republican. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1889-1910, 1889-11-27
JUG RIDGE SOCIETY.
1Ae Simmons Apple Bee Marked WlsA
Many Pleasant Features.

| ne Simmons Apple Bee Marked Wlsh
Many Pleasant Features.
Since our last epistle to your valuable
paper society on the Ridge has been all
agog. Word was sent out early in the
week that an apple bee would be given
by the Simmonses, and the event cul-
minated on Thursday evening in one of
the finest bees we have had in the town
ship for a long time. The Simmons
girls are among our most popular bellies,
and none know better than the Sim
mons boys how to maintain order at So
cial affairs. We regret exceedingly that
| our duty as a journalist compels us to
chronicle the painful fact that Grandpa
Simmons rheumatism is no better.
The Simmons bee drew together the
very best people of the Ridge. with here
and there a black sheep, whose room
would have been preferable to their
company. In justice to the Simmonses,
we are glad to state that these people
it is not necessary to call nameS-were
present without invitation. Fiddler
Cypert had evidently read our scathing
denunciation of his reprehensible con-
duct, and was comparatively sober.
Great is the power of the press. Apples
are not of the best quality this season.
worms being unusually large and abun-
dant. On this account we regretted to
see some of the young folks core their
fruit with such a seeming Indifference
to the way in which said cOring was
done. We do not believe in sighting
ones work, although it is done without
any hope or expectation of reward.
Your correspondent had the honor
to be placed at the head of the
corers, and if all had worked as consci-
entiously as did we, the cider would
have been of better flavor.
In our capacity as a journalist we
must animadvert against the practice
some of the young gentlemen have Of
splitting on the stove. The world moves,
and Ridge society shoUld move with it.
Spit on the floor, gents, spit on the floor.
eWWe think we have the guilty
wretch who placed setting-hen in your
correspondents new hat on the back
porch, where said hen and hat were
found next day. A few Jumps of coal
had been placed under the hen, so Che
would be sure to not forsake her trust,
and she would no doubt have been set
ting there yet if Maggie Simmons had
not found her next day and driven her
hence. Maggie is always ready to do a
kindness, and she will please consider
our hat off in recognition of her interest
in our behalf. Good luck to you, Maggie,
say we. We would not have minded the
trick, only that it was generally under
stood we intended 20 take Sarah Rud-
spinner home that evening, and a walk
of three miles with handkerchief tied
over your head is not the most agreeable
experience in life. However, the pleas
ure of such a charming lady's company
dispelled all thoughts of our missing hat,
and the delightful walk home terminal
ed all too soon. Sarah is one of the most
beautiful and accomplished ladies we
have on the Ridge. The gentle pressure
of her hand at parting at her fathers
gate gave the lie to the story cruelty
circulated that Sarah had herself placed
the hen in our hat.
az Richard Snodgrass took his coon dog
to town last week and had his ears fox
ed and his tail bobbed. The work was
done by your genial tonsorial artist, land
there is no better job of the kind extant.
The dogs appearance is vastly improv-
ed, albeit he seems to miss his tail quite
a little.
BIn our capacity as journalist we
again call the attention of the super
visor to the mudhole in the big road
II " HVNI.
last man fished out of this hole was our
new minister, and it seems about time
it was attended to. This is the second
time we have paused to direct attention
to this crying evil, and on the next &C.
casion somebody will hear something
drop. With both the pulpit and the
press arrayed against him. the super
visor is going to find himself between
the devil and the dun cow. All, there,
old ROad-ScraDeri-COr " World