Woodville Republican. (Woodville, Miss.) 185?-current, 1889-07-06

absurd for hideous old virgin like
yourself to ape the style Of girl of fif.
teen. Go to, vain old woman-instead
OF indulging in such yanities. prepare
for death. who stands waiting for you"
The old lady did not appreciate my
truthfulness. She few at me like an
attenuated tigress, and called me fool
and beast, and ordered me out of her
house The. excitement was so great
that she fell into fit Of coughing,
which killed her. She lived, however,
long enough to alter her will, leaving
every dirhem of her estate to the So
eiety for the conversion OF the French
to Mohamedanism. 1 never saw cent
of it.
This was somewhat discouraging,
but l determined to persevere Bio
hard had dwelt so strongly on the
necessity for absolute truth, that ]
could not think Of going back on it. So
gritted my teeth and waded in.
had an uncle, a very rich man, who
was afflicted with poetry. He was
troubled with the idea that he was a
poet, and spent the bulk of his time
hacking away at it. He had finished a
poem OF thirty-six cantos, and he in
vited me to hear it.
"Uncle," said |, ''the poem may have
merits, but fail to discover them. 1t
is defective in rythm, utterly and en-
tirely devoid OF sentiment, and afro
cious in design. A more stupid. sense
less performance l was never bored
with. 1t is hog-wash. 1t is idiocy-it
is deliberate idiocy 1t was conceived
in weakness, and brought forth in in
sanity. | would, for your sake, that
could call it lunacy, but it lacks the
strength and fire that an overturned in
tellect would have given it. l can not
say lunacy in connection with it, for to
say lunacy presupposes intellect, OF
(which this performance gives no to-
ken. 1t is drool 1t is drivel For
the sake of your family do not publish
it,
| did not expect this criticism to
produce the effect it did, for it was en-
tirely honest and just. But it did not
strike the old gentleman pleasantly at
ALL He glared at me moment fierce
ly, and raising a chair, felled me to the
floor He kicked me out of the house,
protesting the while that a more in
sulting dog than was did not dwell in
lspahan.
He did publish the poem, however,
and the public of Ispahan sustained my
criticism. The wits of Ispahan and
Teheran made him their butt for weeks
But when he died, he left me, who
should have been his heir, bound
copy of the accursed trash.
followed up this thing for year.
told an orator that his peroration was
bosh and his entire speech was clap
trap. l told a dervish that his whin.
ing and bowling were only half as good
as they had been year before. In the
most candid manner l informed al
actor, who had invited me to witness
and criticise his performance, that he
was the worst l over saw-in short, ir
that year / made an enemy of every
man, woman and child in Ispahan; and
what grieved me was that in all thai
time l held closely to the truth, never
deviating from it hairs breath.
And finally l came to blows with
Blohard himself. He asked my candid
opinion of lecture he had delivered
and l told him what I thought, as he
had instructed me. merely remarked
that the badness of the thought was
only equaled by the badness of the ex
ecution, and that both together were
exceeded by the badness of the deliv.
cry. Instead OF thanking me, he flew
into rage.
My son, truth is not the highest wis.
dom in ordinary hands, but silence is.
Only very rich men can afford tC
spread truth about recklessly Trutl
is too precious for everyday use.
When a rich man says II am plain,
blunt mans and am used to speaking
the simple TRUTH call things by theii
right name, | do'-set him down as 9
disagreeable old brute, who goes about
making people uncomfortable, because
he can do it safely. When poor mar
says that same, set him down as a fool
do not advise lying, but beware of tht
too free use of truth. 1t needs to be
handled judiciously, Were the worlt
perfect-were every body as free from
weakness as, for instance, myself, i
would answer, for truth would then bt
pleasant; but as it is, beware Of it
Silence, my ingenious friend, is YOU
best hold. Silence will conceal the fac
that you are an inferior being, and viii
offend nobody.
Let silence be your rule-speech the
exception. Then you shall prosper an(
be counted as one OF the wise. Blu
leave me now, for l would rest.
And Abou. after the manner of III,
Eastern sages, mixed him in tumblei
the strong waters of the Giaour, with
lemon and sugar, and very LITTLE
water, for the water OF Trenton is no
good, and swallowed it, saying, "B,
chesm, but it is good. 1t warns th,
midriff and makes one charitable. Fo
an excuse torepeat, would be willing
almost, to heave out another. chunk o
wisdom"
And with this oriental ejaculation
he clambered into his bed BY th,
late d. K. Locke, in Toledo Blade.
"A letter was recently discovered
among the Massachusetts States arch
ives written by William Cullen Bryan
in November, 1874, and soliciting in tn