Morning journal and courier., 1889-12-05
ORNAM MENTAL.

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 An ornament to American 1etters-The post age estamp.-Burlington Free Press.
 'tFlesh colored hose in two shades-light pink and black, " is the sign in an Eighth street stocking shop.-Philadelphia In- quirer.
 Life is very short, but 1t doesn't seem so when fellow is waiting for an overdue train at country railway station.-Somerville Journal.
 An exchange says: ssRev MT. Smith preach ed at the South church all day yesterday" !" Rev. MT. Smith must be a long -winded speak Burlington Free Press. ..s -
 It is said Napoleon could go to sleep and "wake up when he wanted to-" That's easy enough, but the trouble is to want to wake up in time. = Jacksonville (Fla.) Times Union.
 correspondent who has been reading Stanley's letters asks how to pronounce Mpwapwa. Take mouthful of hot coffee Quincy tnl) Whig.
 Jinks--Winks must be doing finely. He tells me he has country house and city my country house in Winter and my city house in Summer.-New York Weekly.
 Old sport-ssYou don't want ter shoot at them ducks, young fellsr; them's decoys." Young sport-"Well, If they're as hard eat ing as they gre shooting, Decoys can keep his ducks, and welcome to 'em."-Harpsr's Weekly.
 Space Limited.-Mr. Bascom-I notice young Timothyseed is payin' consid' able 'tentions to our 'Lizy Jane. Do you 'spose there's anything between them?
 Mrs. Bascom (who hasn't forgotten old times)-Not much, I guess. when they get to sittin' on the sofa.-Burlington Free Press.
 It was an Oldtewn teacher who thus en- trapped his pupils in the district school:
 Teacher (upon discovering that the fire needs replenishing)-W Which little boy is the strongest Tn the room?
 Loud and unanimous chorus-I, I, I.
 "Well, the strongest one may go down cellar and get an armful of wood."-Lewis- ton Journal.
 "There is one thing, dear madam, about your charming little boy which pleases me particularly" said the visitor, who had pa. tiently submitted to having his corns tram- pied and his whiskers pulled out by young hopeful.
 :'And that isi" smiled mamma.
 "Dsar madam, that he ia not twin."- New York Truth. There is some talk of holding an interna- tional dog fight in this country, but the ex- act location of the contest has not been de- termined on. In compensation for the loss of the Worlds Fair it would seem that New York ought to be made the scene of the edi- flying display. But few cities would care to compete for it, end if the natural objections of the principals in the contest could be over- come, nothing else would stand in the way. Join kaasds, t.sen, sv cry body, and boom New York's great international dog fght.-Chica. 90 News.
 "Doetor," he said, as they met on the plat I form of a street car, "can I get . little ads vice of youa" "For cash?'
 "Well, no. simply want to ask ques- tion or two, and being an old patient of yours, you won't think of charging me-" 'sGo ahead" "Well, my feet are troubling me and l thought"
 "Sayl Cut lem right of" interrupted the l doctor. ''I've often wondered why you l didn't do 1t. I've got to get off here-good night. ."-Dstroit Free Press. She met him on the doorstep. And the tears were in her eyes; And her countenance resembled l Some dark and rainy skies 1 Thus she said unto her husband, "How could you so disparagsf Precious little comfort after marriager" Then he pressed her to his bosom. | For folks quite mistook my meaning, You're my precious. little comfort dear" | Chicago Sun.