The Republican., 1889-04-06


head with it.
80 begin with he said, aftcra moments
silence, .'let me tell you that my name is
Edward Morton. Perhaps you will not be-
lieve me if l say that was once upon
time-what of all things in the world DO
YOU think-a dramatic critic! Yes, it's true.
What is more dramatic criticism was the
beginning and end of my downfall, and this
is how it happened. 1t was about ten years
ago, and soon after1 started my journalistic
career in the provinces, that took aItua-
tion on one of our great daily papers--Ih"
Blunderer, to wit. This succeeded III OBJ
tanning through the influence OF friend at
court, and, for youngster just entering
the profession, it was looked upon as an I'M
mense piece of good fortune However
that may be, up to town | came, and not
being quite fool, turned by chances to
such good account that was spoken of on
all sides as "A promising young man. L
might have gone on this way, and ultimately
attained to bald head and "a sub-editorship
at fifty or So but for doing two exceedingly
foolish things. I made the acquaintance Of
Charlie Dashwood and | fell desperately in
love with pretty actress, and one who was
quite as clever and good as she was pretty
Lizzie Ray burn-you remember her? Ihls
Charlie Eastwood was a journalist like my
self-a wild, harum-scarum fellow OF the
speculative sort-you've met this prototype,
dare say; always going off at tangent,
or breaking out in fresh place when least
expected; full of eXtravagent ideas about
the undiscovered possibilities OF the press :;
always vaporing about the reforms he in
tended to originate, if ever he should edit a
paper of his own. l. at that time, admiring
and looking up to Charlie, not only as the
best of good fellows, which he really was
but as the very prince of journalists and an
original genius, which only too late, have
discov cred he was not, firmly believed in
and held to him in spite of the rIdicule and
chaif of older and wiser heads
''At last, one day Charlie came to me at
the Office in n perfect frenzy Of excitement
with the news that he had just taken the
management of Il new weekly paper called
The Bullseye, which would make its appear
ancc the following week, and which had, as
usual. been started to tilthe not particularly
noticed void. We're all full up with the
exception of the dramat!cs, and, Teddy, my
boy, you're the very mani know you have
ideas Of your own about the way that sort
of thing should be done, and here's the OPP
portunity. Between us. we will make the
paper the biggest go III LONDON
"What Eastwood said was true. ] had
long possessed secret yearnings that way,
which l had at times contided to Charlie.
For a moment considerations of prudence
came to my aid, and ventured the mild
suggestion of doubt as to whether was
quite fitted for that line of work.
"Nonsense, my boyn said Charlie; i
know your proper capacity. You're sure
to MAKE a hit 1t was curious fact that
Charlie possessed the most remarkable in
tuitve faculty for discovering everybody IS
proper capabilities except his own.
"'Besides.' he added, think of Lizzie
"That settled it. Without further ado
closed with the offer, and fortnight later
saw me installed as dramatic critic of The
Bullseye, with the title Of that publication
inscribed on my cards underneath that OF
The Blunderer. The plan CT operation
proceeded to act upon was this: | had long
had wholesome contempt for that class of
dramatic critics forever hanging round
stage doors and hotel bars, and drinking
with managers and actors, Sc / resolved to
set an example in the opposite direction by
keeping religiously aloof from all associa-
ton with the profession-witho one eXcep-
ton. This was Lizzie, who insisted on re-
lines regularly every week, and with whom
/ spent each Sunday afternoon and evening
at her fathers place in Twickenham, whiIher
he had retired to spend the rest of his days,
free from the smoke Of Aldgate and the
cares of the grocery business There had
once been some talk of a Mr. Loydall, Il
huge, beetle -browel, hoarSe-voiced ira
godian, who played heavy lead to Lizzie's
Juveniles at the Olympian, but he soon found
out that he had no chance with me, and
after one or two tusScls retired from the
battle, leaving me to walk over the course
at my leisure.
"As you will guess matters were pretty
well settled between Lizzie and me, and we
obtained old Rayburn's consent to our mar
riage whenever the Blundeser's manage
ment should recognize my merits sufficiently
| to advance my salary, and to enable me tC
take Lizzie away from the stage. The Bulls
eye contrary to everybody's expectations
everybody, that is, outside the Office
showed signs of becoming pronounced
success NY dramatic criticisms were soor
one of the leading features of the journal
| had always had notion that the wither
ing, sarcastic style of writing was bes
suited to me. and this was the line took, witt
| Sucu CleCI lltlJ dJ llIlcS ~ DCCdHIO
to find out whether had been praisiug OF
Stating a piece or an actor. Some people
were unlIind enough to say that they woull
prefer the latter process to the former
Needless to say that, as the power and in
tiuence of the paper increased, soon be
carSa an object of hatred and dread to thu
whole profession. This only tickled my
vanity the more, and would strut alons
Fleet street and the Strand of morning
meeting the scowl of passing pros with
stare of superciIious Indifference.
Zone night, entering my club at the usua
hour. just before starting for the Lorn'
Theater, where new piece, entitled Fo
ife or DEATH was to be produced tina
evening. found a telegram lying for m,
in the rack. 1t was from Lizzie's mother
telling me that Lizzie had been seized witt
a dangerous illness that very morning, ant
begging that l would proceed to the hous
at once. For moment was in a seriou
dilemma. Az all hazards l must see Lizzi
that night, yet it was imperative that
should attend the first nights show at tn
Lorne, having for that special occasion ur
dertaken The Blunderer's special notice il
place of the regular man, who was absen
through indisposition.
"Then an idea struck me as / caught sigh
Of Scrubby, the dramatic critic of tn
Scorcher, at the other end of the room
already preparing to leave. Scrubby was
reliable man, 1 knew, and the best availabl
fer the purpose had in my mind. Crossin