davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1889-01-11

line Ncal SsSKStot tdS uupaaitSiNu 9usSNe
of THE CHICAGO DAILY News may h
found in As00 distinguishing characteristics
which more than anything else have con
tributed to its remarkable growth.
FIRsT;-H 6e DQNv Paber1 oy BHsy PegsAs
Thcpeople ofthe busy " est appreciatek keen
lv the necessityo Of an intelligent knowledge
Of the worlds daily doings, but they are taf
busy to waste valuable time in searching
through a cumbrous :. blanket-sheet' news
PAGER for the real news Of art. Literature
science. religion, politics, end the thousand
and-one things which make up modern ca
ilizaticn. They want news-all the news
but thev don't want il concealed in TN over
poweringfaas Of the trivial andinconsequez
tial. 1t is because THE CHICAGO DAIla
News is "aK z0ksaf end no eaq6,s thu
its circulation is over 9 c a4Ng9R a Neek.1
SEcoNp:-Hia1 LgdsssHatst, I3xssh-aaAas
Nsausbabey. The people demand a far, IN
partial, Independent neNspaper,which give
aH tie mes, and gives It free from the tain
of partisan bias. With no mere political am
bition to crafty, no 3" AK to grind,'' the IN
partial, independent newspaper may truly Il
sguide, philosopher and friend y to hcnesi
menofevery shadeofpoliticdl faith andihi
i why THE CHICAGO DAILY NEWS hes Il
day circulation Of FOYER "a million a a1e
THE CHICAGO DAIRY News now adds
these two comprehensive elements ef aol
laritv, a third, in its unparalleled redrell
Of price TO ONE CENT A DAY.
II is akoays ks1ss ezoagA,-Nesgy de
THE CHICAGO DAILY NEws is fcr A.e
all newsdealers at one CNf per COPS
will be mailed, postage paid, fer W
year, or rs cents per month, The laf
and mechanic can now afford, Is wei
merchant and professional F'aas a. fy
metropolitan daily.
Address VICTOR r. LAWsD.S
Publisher The Daily Eev's cai4zS
The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1889-01-11

their homes, and snow 20 those who eau, ho9l1p.st. ~.
rsi,ntie and very useful SAMPLES.
ThePe samples, as well as the watch, we send free and after you
tsvs keot them in your home for :. months and shown them
s1,,nse mo may have called, they become your own property;
a. a. u,ssih.e 10 make this great offer, sending the SOLID
ths samples in any locality, always results IN q large trade ior
- a ~ ~ our samples have been In a locality for a month or Two
ns, ~, 81 from $1,000 to $4,000 IN trade from the
surrounding country. This, the most wonderful oner ever
tn,vn Is made in order that our samplesm may be placed al once
.j,ere tltey can be seen, all over America, Write u once, anu
~ sure Of the chance. Reader II Will be hardly any trouble
ne o,, \, show tnesamples 10 those who may call at your home
snt ynur reward viii be most satisfactory. a postal cara on
sst ~ a yrite IA costs but | cent snd after youknow all ~ you
Nh.e. " : "a On further. why no harm is doue. But II youdo
800 vonr address at once, you can secure tiREE one o. the
senA sN ~ ,cft watches In the world and our large line OF
IssrIy SAMPLES. We pay all express irsisat &c
sssrsss 80. SIISsoN a CO., Box sls, fVhiLAspj nAinA
The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1889-01-11

If you want the celebrated 'Reeve" or
Lester boots, go to the New Store under
the Opera House.
The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1889-01-11
MEDICINES

Wepygb0se to KEEP a stock at
aHMe 0aa70us Proprietary Meal-
zines that there IS a1zy denaana
for, and aoiX, from time to time,
add to orr stoek all safeh that may
be eugul1ea fer. w annex a
Price list, and eau furnish any
byocu1uble articles IN this line
at about the same acreage of Price
The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1889-01-11
E. A. URION.

If you rave any need for dishes see our
immense stock before you buy. We have
nearly all kinds, i. b. Humphreys &Co.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-02-19
DERRY's HARNESS OIL SOAP.

Three sizes-$1, so and 25c sizes; the finest
article in the world for harness. For sale by
feb27 W. r CREIGHTON & co.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-02-19
letter from Fauouicr.

Correspondence of the ALEXANDRIA GAzETTE.l
MARSHALL, Feb. IS, 1SS9.-Quite change
has come over US here. The mountains are
white with snow and sleet; during the past
week small quantity of ice was housed ;
the longer days and warm suns will dimin'
ish the chances to get the usual supply.
While the physicians have no serious dis
eases to treat there is some sickness In our
midst. The families of DR.. Frost and Mr.
J.H. Foster have suffered from influenza.
The convenience of the telephone allows
the prompt aid of consulting physicians
and in this way Drs. Hicks and Sewers, OF
Warrenton, and Settle, OF Paris, may now
and then be seen in our midsy, and messages
exchanged in few minutes as lately oc-
Cured when Mrs. Woodward, most inter-
esting lady became seriously i'll.
We cay all praise is due to Professor Il.
M. Smith to urge settlement OF the state
debt. Already the neglect OF doing this mas
set back the prosperity of Virginia quarter
of century and to the outside world has
given people poor opinion OF the integrity
of her citizens.
Merchants in Marshall have THIS year an
nounced To customers new schedule; VIZ,
the shortest credit, and then settlement.
Our schools continue to prosper. Through
the courtesy of Robert A. Bright, esq, OF
williamsburg, and Secretary of the Alumni
Association of William and Mary College,
we have received the announcement of this
historic institution. The faculty consists OF
siT professors, among whom are Lyon G..
TYLER. A. M. University of Virginia; j. Les,
lie Hail. late Fellow of Johns Hopkins Uni
versity. w and Hugh Bird, of Nashville Nor
NAL College, with others of distinguished
merit and who will doubtless contribute tc
revive the prestige of this. the oldest col
leee in the country. In Fsuquier county
the writer knows of only two of her alumni
Bishop Randolph and a. S. Furcron.
Among late publications may be noticed
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-02-19
ADVICE To MOTHERS.

Mrs. WINsLoW'S SOOTHING SYRUP, for
children toething is the prescription of ono OF the
best female rurses and physicians in the United
States. aud bs5 been used for forty years with
never failing success by millions of mothers for
thcie children. During the process ot teothing
its value is incalcu!ablo 1t relieves tho child
from pain cures dysontery and disrrbea, gripping
in the bowes and wind By giving health
to the clii'd il rests the mother: pTioa % cents
bottle.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-02-19

r,HE LADIES FRIENDS-AC CARPET SWEEP
ER and an ENTERPRISE MEAT CuTIEK.
Both are useful all the year round and make
capital Christmas gift.
dec10 JAS. +. CARLlN q oONo
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-02-19
Ru Grnen & wise. Auctioneers.


DY VIRTUE of decree Of the Corporation
d Court of the city of Alexandria, Va, rendered
on the 26th day of January, 1889, in the cause OF
Karen Happuch Crump vs.. Isaac Kudd ct ais the
undersigned, commissioner therein named, will
House Royal street. on TUEsPAF FS0T@sTs Ts
OF LAND in the city of Alexandria, Va, begin,
ming at the northeast corner of Washington and
Wilkes streets, and running north on Washington
street 90 feet inches to 12-feet alley, and on
Wilkes street 20 feet inches to 10 feet alley.
The lots to be sold according to plat.
Terms of Sale One third of the purchase mon,
ey to be paid in cash. and the residue in two equal
instalments at Blk and twelve months from the
day OF sale, with interest at the rate OF SIX per
centnm per annum, to be secured by the notes Of
the purchaser, with satisfactory surety, and the
title to be retained until the purchase money ia
fully paid with right of the purchasers to antici'
pate the deferred payments.
H o. CLAUGHTON,
Commissioner of Sale.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-02-19
BuckIen's Arnica SaIye.

THE BEST SALvE in the world for Cuts, Bruises
Sores, Ulcers, Salt Rheum, Fever Sores, letter,
Chappcd Hands, Chilblains Corns and all Skin
Eruptiors and positively cures Piles, or no pay
required. 1t is guaranteed to give perfect satis-
fsction or money refunded. Price 25 cents per
box. For sale by E. S. Leadbeater s BIO.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-02-19
ALEXANDRIA VA. TUESDAY EVENING FEBRUARY 10 1889

tor the benefit of Virginisrs outside of the
State valuable book, Virginia and Vir.
giDians," By R. A. Brock, esq, the talented
secretary of the Virginia Historical Society
who has received lately the degree of F. r.
is. of England,
That the Journal of the N. E. medical SO.
cety should DOW be in state of suspended
animation is universally regretted, at least
by the Faculty. 81.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-02-19
TRUSTEES SALE.


By virtue of deed of trust dated on the iotn
day of March, 1873, and recorded in the lano
records of the city of Alexandria, in Virginia, IN
deed book No. 7, page rs, made by Thomas fefry
and wife to E. T. Carlin, the subscriber lWno py
an order of the Corporation Court for the ssd Guy
of Alexandris made and entered on the 23d osy
Of January, 1889, has been appointed ana suosti-
tinted as trustee in said deed OF trust in the place
of the said E. R. Carlin, who has departed this
ife1 will by request Of the holder OF the note &C.
cnred bv the said deed Of trust, offer for aae on
SATTRDAY. tho Odd day of February, 1852, at
nnblic auction at the front door OF the Market
Pniidinp. on Royal street, in said city, at IL m
the property conveyed by tho said deed OF tTust,
to wit: nno,-,rD. a.,
said CITY of Alexandra, bounded as foliows, viz;
Beginning on the north side Of Prince street 70
feet east of Washington street. and running there
on north rs feet, cast feet north "a feet to
ten.feet alley; east on said alley Ia feet, south
100 feet to Prince street, west on Prince street
81 feet to the beginning, with all sppurtenances'
Terms of Sale: 81 500 in cash, and the residue
of the purchase money in two equal payments at
six and twelve months from the day OF sale, WITH
the pririlege Of paying all the purchase money IN
c,sh the deferred payments TO bear interest from
the day of SALE and to be secured by the notes OF
the purchaser, and deed OF trust On the property.
Conyeyancing at the expense of the purchaser.
WORTH HULFIsH,
;ono5 cots Substituted Trustee.
/
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-02-19
.AsIexsucSIx & G sef's
FCBI YsEGD DALF and TRI. WKRELT 81
Edgar WDER,

At he Gazette gsiiaisq, 31U eHd 312 Prines 6
DAILY. 7EI- WEEKLY.
One ysG.. 90 Cris ysas s.......",.Ss W
Sir months ....... 8 co Sir mos.s... .......... 2 90
One month s...... 80 Three s,ontks..... 90
Contract aIrerse,s ;R not js alo,sed to exceed he:r
space ,ess TIE IS pa2 er 1t transient rrtesr
ard a,,dsr circumstances rA they be allo'ced TO
-tirertse other faan tcr c5ita'cfe business in the
space CONTRACTED for.
AH transient advertisements n..st Be paid for in Cd
vGncE
Marriage and death notices must be Da;d fer ia Cd
uGnce.
Resolutions in neaoram othents, tributes Of respect
resoltions adopted by societies persons, nless Of
public coicer1l, uil only De psi'sd in t.:S paper as
advertisements.
Persons leasing the ciy car haos tie Gazette mailed
to them, postpaid, for fJty cents month. en6 ibc
address changed es often desired.
al Communications should 5c addressed 70 6asetts,"
Alexandria, Vc.
The Gazette office IS connects: igih the Telephone 8r
change. Advertisements orders for Ike pGper necs
CT any information business cd: 5s seat 5r Tel
phone.
[nsrsd at t.s POstq6gcs ct A'e1atar:c Virc;a;a,
sscosdcless a:Gt;eS.;
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-02-19

At DE Gazette ggi!aisq. SIC end 312 Prinee 6
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-02-19

DRIED CHERRIES, Evaporated Peaches and
- Apples for sale by
jan20 j. G. MILBURN.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-02-19

DoTATo CHIPS, in half-pound boxes, received
4 to-day by
noY2 j. G. MILBURN
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-02-19
An Unusual Clearing Sale 0fDry Goods Notions, &c.

The stock consists of LADIES', MISSES and
CHILDREN'S WRAPS, which have determined
to sell at HALF PRICE, having too many on
hand and not wishing to carry them over
A great many NOTIONS, viz: HOSIERY,
GLOVES HANDKERCHIEFS. CORSETS, &c.
An extensive lire of DRESS BRAlDS and other
trimmings
An immense stock OF UNDERWEAR for ladies,
gents and children.
A complete stock OF DRY GOODS, too numcr
ous To mention.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-02-19
AUCTION SALES.
By Green & Wise, Auctionecrs.
OOMMISSI NERS' SA l. E. &.

NJ III L
By virtue of a decree of the Corporation Curt
of the city of Alexandria, Va, rendered at tho
October term, 1878, in the suit OF Thornton and
wife w. Cole ct ais, the undersigned, commission
ers therein named, will, on SATURDAY tho 9th
day of March, 1889, at II o'clock M, in front Of
the entrance to the Court room, on Fairfax street.
Alexandria, Va sell by public auction, LOI0i'
GROUND, with two FRAME TENEMENIs
thereon situated the south side of Queen street,
between Henry and Fayetto streets, Alexandria,
Va, 30 feet in front and 100 feet in depth to a
15-feet alley.
Terms of Sale Ono third of the purchase mon
ey in cash. and the residue in two equal payments
at six and twelve months, and to bear interest
from the day of sale. and to be secured by tho
notes of the purchaser, with approved personal
security and the retention of the title to the prop
erty until said notes paid.
ALBERT STUART, Comm,rs. of Sale.
JOHN NJ. JOHNSON,
r.l1
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-02-19

7. John S. Beach Clerk of the Corporation Court
Of the city of Alexandra, certify that the bond
required by the decree in this cause has been duly
executed. c,,,
ian28 2aw4w JOHN ). BEACH, ClerK.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1889-02-19
MPoRTANT NOTICE.
HANDSOME GOODS AT LOW PRICES.

u, We have large stock of Haviland China, Royal
worcester DOultor, Cameo and Japanned Goods,
WIN some very rich Cut Glass Patterns, which
EVIL pe VIII dispose of for the holidays at GREATLY
HHhDUCED PRICES. If you want handsome
TpSyiand Lunch, Fish, Ice Cream or Salad Set,
n 6SEait, Cake or Oat IDEAL Plates, Chocolate jug,
6Se Eole Dishes or Celery Trays, or rich piece OF
Sa'aeo Doultor Royal Worcester for the Cabinet,
We can give you some rate bargains. We invite q
COMPARISON with other styles snd prices, and feel
are is!e tnat We can please you. Give us call, and
WV make purchase il this line until you see
sOoas. dec15l z. ]. MILLER & SON.
)O&ESTIC SEWING MACHINES, st this time
- Inc leading machine. Prices the same as
,. asaai. Old machines Of any kind taken in part
pAyment ssPlease cali md examine
e~hs =. :. LGADREATER & BRO.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-12-18

better not start for New York. I've
known Colonel Sherman some time,
and always found him a man of his
word and if he says he will have you
shot if you leave here without his con-
sent, believe he will do it."
1t will be believed that neither
President, Colonel, nor anybody else
tried to stop the noise that followed.
The soldiers cheered, yelled, laughed,
and some of than jumped with the
fun of the thing; and the captain
wished he had let we'll enough alone.
Ledger.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-12-18

About five miles from Aiken, s. c.,
on the Charleston dirt road, and in
sight of the railway, is a little place
called Montmorenci. Many years ago
young woman came with her pitch
er to Montmorenci, and set the vessel
on a stone post that some of the rail
road men had moved there. While
drawing the water fash of lightning
came that struck the chain to which
the well-bucket was attached, and the
woman was killed in her tracks. Her
remains were removed, but the pitch
er was left just where the dead girl
had set it.
To this day the pitcher remains in
that same place, and SO far from being
removed it is said that no living hand
has ever touched it save its owners,
although near the side Of a public
road.
But the most wonderful thing is the
superstition attached to this pitcher.
There is an indescribable influence
surrounding it that prevents its touch.
Hundreds of people have gone with
the firm intention of lifting the pitch
er, but when they approached it
strange repugnance comes over them
and they hurriedly depart without
carrying out the object of their visit.
One night bully in the neighbor-
hood, while under the influence of liq-
uor, made a bet with some friends that
he would 60 and bring back the pitch
er. He left to do so, but soon return
ed as pale as sheet and empty hand
ed. Boys" he remarked, "no person
alive can lay hands on that pitcher,
and wouldn't attempt it again for
the whole of Aiken county" He re-
fused to tell his experience.
Other parties have gone to see it,
but meet with the same repulsive feel
ings. So soon as they would step off
a few feet the sensation would leave
them. Parties have frequently anus
ed themselves throwing stones at the
pitcher, and when almost in reach the
missiles seemed to glide around it.
The other day, when Mr.. Toomer
passed by this spot with his wife, he
got out and tried his craftsmanship
with brickbats, and while pretty ac-
curate thrower he met with no success
that he had as well try to knock
down sunbeam with rock. Mr..
Toomer further stated that he had
been passing this pitcher for years,
and always found it in the same place
on the post. Before reaching it he
would firmly make up his mind to re-
move the vessel but when he approach
ed it he experienced the same repug-
nance to touching it as an uncanny
object. The old we'll from which the
dead girl was drawing water has long
been filled up. and no sign of it re.
main. Mr.. Toomer is an entirely re-
liable gentlemen.-Athens Banner.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-12-18

One day when they were criticising
DIR. Bliss, General Sheridan came to
the doctors defense.
"Dr. Bliss was a good physician, y
said General Sheridan, "he saved my
life once"
"How2 How did Bliss save your
life Z"
"Well," said Sheridan. 81 was very
sick in the hospital after the battle of
Winchester. One day they sent for
DIR. Agnew, Of. Philadelphia, and he
gave me some medicine, but / kept
on getting worse. Then they sent
for DIR. Frank Hamilton and he gave
me some more medicine, but | grew
worse and worse. Then they sent for
DR.. Bliss, and"
"And-you still grew worse ?"
"No, DR.. Bliss didn't come he saw
ed my life.-Ex."
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-12-18
MICHIGAN CENTRAL
"The Niagara Falls Route"
Time Card in Effect.

*Daily. tDaily except Saturday. All other
trains daily except Sunday. Parlor cars on day
trains. Sleeping cars on night trains.
j. WHITING, Ticket Agent
o.w. RUGGLE5, G.. p. & r. Agt.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-12-18
WIT AND HUM0R.
A Bible girl-Jennie Sis.-Ex.

A secondhand press-hugging
widow.-Free Press.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-12-18
0. |. PARTRIDGE.
Real Estate Agent

Rooms 4, 5, Dawson Block.
VIII take charge of estates for residents and non
residents. collect rents pay taxes place insurance
obtain abstracts Of title, etc.
Office hours-10 to 10 A. NJ, 4to6P.M.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-12-18

Was Miss Yellowleaf's portrait a
good likeness 1t must have been ;
she refused to take it from the artist.
Life.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-12-18

1t is said that smacking the lips is
a vulgar habit. Much depends on
whose lips are smacked.- Boston Her.
aid.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-12-18

Charlie Giltedge-In what respect
does your imagination serve you most
advantageously?
Poet (sadly)-When l am at the
restaurant, imagining that the liver l
am eating is quail. Chicago Chaf.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-12-18

"You have never taken me to the
cemetery ?" said married woman to
her husband.
"No, DEAR" he replied, "that is a
pleasure l have yet in anticipation"
-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-12-18


Ma, MICH, WEDNE
WIT AND HUM0R.
A Bible girl-Jennie Sis.-Ex.
A secondhand press-hugging a
widow.-Free Press.
1t is said that smacking the lips is
a vulgar habit. Much depends on
whose lips are smacked.-Boston Her.
aid.
Was Miss Yellowleaf's portrait a
good likeness ? 1t must have been ;
she refused to take it from the artist.
Life.
The Edison girl-She has so much
magnetism.
You bet she has. Why, courting
that girl is one long electric spark
Elk.
Tod suppose the best way to find
out whether she loves me is to go right
up and ask her.
Ned-Not at all, my boy. Ask one
of her girl friends.-Ex.
"You have never taken me to the
cemetery said a married woman to
her husband.
"No, DEAR" he replied, "that is a
pleasure have yet in anticipation"
-Ex.
Sunday school teacher--Willie,
have you had anything during the
week to be especially thankful for?
Willie-Yes'm. Johnnie Podgers
sprained his wrist and l licked him
for the first time yesterday.-Ex.
Charlie Giltedge-In what respect
does your imagination serve you most
advantageously?
Poet (sadly)-When l am at the
restaurant, imagining that the liver l
am eating is quail.-Chicago Chat.
She knew the grip. BY quick
shot he had just rescued her from the
clutches of bear. "What were your
thoughts when bruin commenced to
squeeze ?" was his inquiry,
"Oh, Charlie, I thought of you."-
Elk.
How he warns his slippers. Mrs.
Bloodgood-Whatl not an open fire.
place nor stove in the whole house
How does your father warm his slip
pers!
Willie (ruefully-Warms them on
me, ma'am.-Ex.
Judge-Now, Uncle 'Lijab, were
there not some mitigating circumstan-
ces in the case?
Uncle 'Lijah (who witnessed the
prisoners drunkenesss)-I guess not,
sab. Da wus muffin but empty beer
bottles, sah.TEx.
Surprised innocence. "What are
yer doing, you young rascal" said
farmer to remarkably small boy, on
finding him under tree in his or
chard with an apple in his hand.
"Please, sir, I was only going to put
this ere apple back on the tree, sir;
it had fallen down, sir.-Judge.
A A'swell menu. Cholly Tapely--
Why did you leave your boarding
house, old chappie a?
Reggie Lacy couldn't stand the
swell dinners Mrs. Hashleigh gave.
Why, what ever did she give you
for five dollars week
Stewed dried apples, mostly.-Ex.
Pa was too anxious. Father-Ma-
ria, has that young man gone away
yet?
Maria-No, pa, he is just propos-
ing
Father-Oh, all right
Maria-Proposing to go.
Father-Well, you tell him to git.
Epoch.
Finance (of wealthy but ugly MANI
Have you shaved?
He=Yes.
Have you plenty of perfume on i?
Yes.
No tobacco in your mouth?
No.
Well, then you may kiss my poodle
Pick Me Up.
Freddy-Ma, whenever pa meets
DIR. Vandel he always says to him
"How are you, old hoss !" what does
he mean by that?
Mao, it's nothing more than a
term to express thorough familiarity.
Uncle Josh-Maybe; bat rather
think he calls the doctor old hoss'
because he's such a famous charger.
-Ex.
That omnipresent sell. Mrs. Cot
touburry-Why don't you 60 on It's
a splendid story.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-12-18

Sunday school teacher--Willie,
have you had anything during the
week to be especially thankful for?
Willie-Yes'm. Johnnie Podgers
sprained his wrist and licked him
for the first time yesterday.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-12-18

Judge-Now, Uncle 'Lijab, were
there not some mitigating circumstan-
ces in the case?
Uncle 'Lijah (who witnessed the
prisoners drunkenesss)-I guess not,
sab. Da wus muffin but empty beer
bottles. sab.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-12-18

Tod suppose the best way to find
out whether she loves me is to 60 right
up and ask her.
Ned-Not at all, my boy. Ask one
of her girl friends.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-12-18

The Edison girl-She has so much
magnetism.
You bet she has. Why, courting
that girl is one long electric spark
Ex.