Evening journal., 1889-05-10
TIRED OH so TIRED.
"6si6ER" REELS OFF A LIST UNTIL
SHE'S TIRED OF THAT, TOO.

Enough of So Called Civilization-OrD Dudes,
Egotists and Humbugs She Is Weary.
Especially Tired of Being Told That
Woman Can't Take Care of Herself
I am tired Of civilization and all the so
| called improvements Of modern science.
! am tired Of sewer connections, steam heat,
! furnaces and double windows | am tired of
people who believe in all the gospels but the
gospel Of fresh air, and who count the first
aud only aim Of mortal existence TO be-to
keep warml am tired of the evolution of
tho ''hired girl" and the embarrassmentsco con-
sequelt upon meeting her on the new foot
ing. am tired Of having TO wear twenty
pounds Of clothing when one would suffice.
am tired Of trying TO compromise on dress
reform, and the consequent scorR of the low
minded. | am tired Of paying for dead
horses, and Of being cheated in special bar
gains. | am tired Of encountering the merci-
less woman with a dead bird ON her bonnet
and the idiotic woman chewing gum l am
tired Of the cat which lies ia wait for the
spring robin, and Of the good little Sunday
school boy who is also lying low with his
sling shot.
SOME OF THE HUMBUGs SHE HATES.
am tired of cultivating people in whom
take far less interest than do in carrots and
cabbages. | am tired Of excessively candid
people whose fraRkness is the outcome Of
boorishness and i'll breeding am tired Of
being told that mouey does not bring happi-
ness, when | know that the statement is a
fallacy and long to prove it. am tired of
dudes ye gods how tired | am of them and
of the cacking voices Of loud mouthed peo-
pie everywhere. / am tired of looking
through crowds for faces to take on trust
am tired Of law makers who cannot tell the
distinction between freedom and license, be-
tween the American eagle and the low flying
foreign buzzard. / am tired OF the devil
turned monk, and people who steal "the
livery of heaven to servo the devil i'm am
tired Of mon who mistake this great breezy
globe Of sunshine, as it spins through snow
dazzle and summer blossom, for cuspidor
and live in it but to deile it. am tired Of a
law that does not justify homicide in the case
of the hanson cab driver and the brute who
carries black snake whip to torture his
horses with am tired Of the patient de-
spair written in the faces of lost dogs and in
the eyes Of horses slowly suffocating in nose
bags. l am tired of hearing people blame
Providence for the loss of friend or child
/ wien violated laws of hygiene killed him and
Providence had naught TO do with it. am
tired Of ear muffs, and Of awaiting the day
when the mills of the gods shall grind their
wearers into fine dust / am tired Of egotis-
tical people who SEQ no particular merit in
even the plan of redemption because they
wero not consulted in regard to it l am
tired Of doing things because the rest OF the
world do them, and OF being considered a
crank if l preserve enough individuality to
refuse to bs q conformist. / am tired of be-
ing labeled with the great alike, " like chari-
ty bibs at fair. am tired Of being served
with vinegar and tannin when ! call fo1
claret, and with bottled thunder and light
( ming when l ask for whisky to take homo t.
an invalid parent.
rnRKD OF SEX DISTINCTIONS.
! I am tired Of all the impositlons pat upos
me because / am q woman / am tired 0
!, waiting for tho day when can have an oQua
r chance with the men, and can be genH
t hammered politician, a oosualer o. a noal
I. county commissioner with "th8 rest of tn
A boys" am tired Of folks after they goo to-
S old to turn a coffee mill expecting to stay &
q the ships helm and guido her through th
u breakers l am tired of last years flowe
pods in this summers garden, and Of au tw
legged donkeys ! am tired Of eSpandil
sympathy upon book agents, cripples, hurd
gurdy grinders, and tramps / am tired c
S the brakeman who night after night an
year after year cries "Bvingston" on tho 81
t burban train. am tired of tho mother VIII
a allows her boy to be a little rowdy because
. Is boys way when no might be Iittl
~ y Lord Fauntleroy with proper training.
: am tired of seeing children sent 10 parents G
q recklessly as though ono should send pearls {
: swine or garlands OF summer flowers b Bee
e lamites. | am tired of people who neve
o mean what they say or say what they noer
{ / nm tired of waiting for death 10 prove ho'
o good a fellow man was, or how noble a sair
! and martyr woman has been. I am tire
{ Of hearing that our girls cannot So sbot
= without chaperons, when the fashion is onl
4 toadyism borrowed from European societ.
r am tired Of being asked to believe that
sweet and true American girl may not
trusted the world over without a keeper.
# am tired of people who make long prayer
while their fingers are twisted in the cola
Of an employe or a debtor, and of men VII
talk about Heaven when thoy are unfit to liV
. in the best circles Of HadeS I am tired {
g injustice that gives tho golden cup to the pr
" tender, and places the crown upon tho in
s postors head. am tired Of extortion an
10 unalleviated wretchedness l am tired
e tearing through life kindling flames that &
8 not pay for tho matches and candles used.
y am tired Of tear shedding and the grea
y voiceless supplication Of dumb brutes an
!, little innocent children in pain. ! am tire
4 Of trying to keep cool AMI calm in storm
n that constantly send bravo ships onto Il
e. rocks. am tired Of big troubles and Of lit
8 facts, of roaring lions and little foxes. a,
4 tired of lots Of things besides, with no tin
to onumerate them.-Amber in Chicago II
bune.
4 Getting a Night on.
1fO4,te - q rvan l-,,ov.-,, eIonfr-fr. ltol