The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-01-07
BRIGHT BITS.

ONLY QUESTION OF TrHE.-Mabsl-Ther go
Mr. tledgeoy and Ethel Gibson. | heard that
they were engaged; are tney;
Flossie-Not yet, but ] think Ethel intends
that they shall be.-Ne3C Orleans Times.
Mr.. NEwLYwED-Aly dear, what is this pro-
cesson passing through my back yard? l
thought tie political excitement was over.
Mrs. Newywed- Why. lovey, that isn't pro
cession It's the bred ri rs cousins coming to
call on r.-Burtinqt0n Free Press.
ToUoH LUcK-First Stage Robber-What did
you git yesterday, Jerry:
Second Robber-Nothin'. There wasn't no.
body III the stage 'ceptln lawyer, Two PLUMP
ers and prima donna, an professional cour-
te5y wOuldn { allow me 70 touch EN-, or course.
-Terre Haute Express.
LANDRua real estate agent)-This corner lot
you may have for 500 front foot.
Bingham prosperous Isn't that trhe
steep?
Landrum-Steep? No, Just look at the
magnificent sky over this lot that | don't
charge anything for Yen0icjHe'S NetcS.
MISS LAKKsIDE-You eastern women don't
seem to a 70 the life and energy our western
girls have. Now you can bet that | look out
for number one, and mean to get ahead II
there's any show for it.
Miss Beaconstrest-Tha is a good idea of
yours-try to get ahead. You have the feet
already .-Terre Hdute Gazette.
THE ANARCHIST had just come home with a
clean shirt on.
Good heavens, Barlowski!'' exclaimed his
wife, sinking into n chair, nave you become a
bloOd-suckng capitalist and aristocrat?'
mo, he said, "the sdirt was present.
"HOW does it happen that you haven't traded
it for whisky"
at was the saloonkeeper who gave it to me, -
he replied, bitterly. Chicago Tribune.
DURING the late war a young southern soldier
just bel ore going into battle, called his servant
to him and said, most sO!emnly: Rod | may
be killed in this battle, and if am, find my
body. buy a coffin" handing him his belt of
money, ''and take me home to my mother. You
may have whatever money is lett The boy
took the money and looked up with a broad
grin. MARS Raymond said he, "how much
you think dat box gwine to cost?'-Harper'S
Magazine
AN EXCHANGE says that in the Arctic regions,
when a man des res a divorce, he quits the
house ia anger and does not return for several
days The wife understands the hint, packs
her trunk aud leaves. We can understand Eve
packing her trunk and leaves, for her ward
robe was leaves and nothing else, but you can't
make us believe that woman could get along
with such himsy clothing in the arctic regions
Even her aunt Arctic would scorn a wardrobe Of
that material Texas Sifings
Mrs MARIGoLD Chostess at fashionable re-
ception)-COma :, Mr.. Swinburne, let me intro
duce you to Miss R1chgirl. We want you two
to fill up set.
Mr.. S. (hestatingly)-I don't know that care
to be introduced TO Miss Richgirl. She seems
TO be so naughty and all that, don't you know;
I'm afraid she wouldn't care to dance with me-
Mrs. M-Oh, don't have any fears on that
score, Mr. Swinburne. Miss Richglrl isn't bit
particular whom she dances witty Yankee
Blade.
EMBARRAssING.-A.- is your prospec-
tive bride going TO give you on New Years.
asked a young society man of his friend.
b believe she is going to give me hand
somely worked watch cas-, and l am in a fix
about it.
How so?"
ssWell Won sea | pawped nv watch to get her
a Christmas present and haven't been able to
redeem it yet, so you see I'll be in a sort Of a
corner when she presents me with the watch
case. "-Terds SiftingS