The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-09-17
BRIGHT BIS.

TIE man who wants to use Central Park for
the world S fair is le ident cal man who thought
i Wodld be a COOL idea 10 put the bull in the
china shop.-Judge.
ILLINOIS claims to be the only state in the
union at is out Of debt This is a healthy con-
dltiop for n state that is consttutionally and
chronically Ill-LOIUeH COurier.
JACOBS oPPoRTUSIrY.-Mr Himmelstein (who
was first TO get oyer)-Run toward de bull,
Chacob! Wave him your redt handkerchief
And you, Rachel, come dis way! Cnacoo is der
Won to be tossed-he has der live-insurance.-
Puct.
SHE Gin grand tand}-What tickles the crowds
don't see anything TO laugh at.
he-D mt you see ha! h4!-that the umpire
no! no has just had all his front teeth-haw
haw!-knocked out by pitched ball?-Chicago
tribune.
SHE Cor THE FAcrs.-"Oh, had my fortune
told, and Miss LarAins broke off the engage
nent."
Why, is she as supersitious as that?"
"Oh, no; but my fortune was told by Brad
street, and that settled me"-Hdrper's BdzGr.
De PIERsoN-Aw. old chappie, 50 it's all over
between you and Miss Kate?
Fitz Noodle-Yaas,
De PiersOn-Wnat was the cause?
Fltz No0dle-Tnat beaSty brat of a brother
mr. peppsr on my cane.-BinghGnIton Re
publican.
ISIS PLANTAGEEET De VERE-That mans at
LcutlOus 10 inc are IliOsi Juc
reputation of beng fortune-hunter. Do you
suppose that it is papa's wealth that allures
MIN?
Hiss Dolly Flicker (thoughtfully)-why what
else can it De?-Life.
A SERIOUS MIsrAKE.-Enraged Father-Well.
that's the last time I'll ever be fool enough to
give any of my daugute S a wedding check.
MJtner-Why, Charles? There's nothing
wrong, hope.
Euraged Father-Yes, but there is That fool
of q Snu-in- In u has and mad il CaShpl
Judge.
The CORRESPONDENT who wants to know chow
to cook cabbage without having an odor IN the
house Is informed, in abseace of the expert
VINO conducts our household department. that
another .oO1 way is to boil the cabbage in the
middle OF q l0-acre lot and keep the doors and
Windows Of the house tightly closed while 1t is
cooking. -NorristoWn Herald
GEORGE" remarked Mrs Jackhi-h to her
husband, who 10 this Sam Taylor | heard you
aud Maj. johnson talking about? Is he good
waiter"
"A good waiter, my DEAR What do you
mean?"
why, I heard you tell the major that down
at the club the other night Sam Taylor came in
with tray full and dropped his pile, and /
thou ht he must have been very careless"
An then George gaz3d out of the window
with q far-away look in his eyes. Life.
"Gosul but it's hot" he said. as he backed
into doorway on Woodward avenue to mop
bis brow.
YES, but it is needed" replied the man who
was ahead of him by about two minutes.
lis it? WHAT for p
The potato crop"
All yes. Isuppose So"
There was a silence for minute or two, and
then he q cried:
How viii it help potatoes?''
BAKE 'em ~ for tae tabl : and thus save
a heap of fuel and trouble next winter. If you
lave few inmates to spare will figure a
little, I'd l thln& we can arrive at a pretty
close estimate of The fuel Ii remember right
it axes four pounds of coal to ba 4e six pJla
toes. Let US now estimate the yield Of
I'm be hanged if we will :" growled the
other, and he went off huffy.-Detroit Free
Press.