The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1889-01-05
LIGE'S LUCK.
The Story Of a Big Find.

tng-ln the rather DufdenSome name
of Elijah Worthington Graves; Lig'
for short, and who counted one o
the seventy odd pupils who absorbed
wisdom and made life a burden tt
the long-suffering andpatient teacher
in the Plum street, Deadwood, school
The boy whom he addressed was
much like himself, under the disguise
of grime and rags which covered him
the only difference being that hi
individuality was determined By
q name peculiar to himself
to wit: "Jim-Jams," He had doubt
less, at an early period of his exis.
tence, been ehristened James In the
orthodox manner, but that title had
long since been discarded by his com
panions for the more striking nom de
plume before alluded to.
He was still farther rendered illus.
trious by the possession Of an Under:
sized, tan-coiored; ''tihchbaek''
mule, which dragged out a miracu-
lous existence on visibly nothing, and
answered to the airy appellation Of
Pansy: Furthermore he was joint
owner of a small two-wheeled cart,
the wheels whereof being the sole re.
mainder of a stray perambulator,
which had, in it's palmy days, given
sundry airings to numerous juve-
nile Deadwcedites, and, which had
changed ownership q score of times
being finally relegated to the region 81
things decayed-the dust-heap1
where from it had been rescued in
triumph by the two "pards," Jimmy
and Lige. The wagon box had been
fearfully and wonderfully constructed
from bits Of boards gathered here
and there, by hook or crook, in the
partners zeal to provide some means
of locomotion 5ther than their nat:
hral giftsa, pair of legs respectively.
AS for Lige, he was the only child
of poor but decidedly not honestpar-
ents, the female moiety of whom had
long since succumbed to the COM
bined effects of general shiftlessness
and opium, while the male sponsor
for his existence. yet in the flesh, was
as far gone In wicked ways as his
capabilities for liquor and opium
would permit.
Let no deluded reader suppose that
Lige Is an embryo hero, who, after
the fashion ofmost narrators, can be
washed up, indicted into some new
clothes, and made to shine forth into
magnificent potentialities. Lige was
not a cherub, either patent or con-
cealed. Hewould lielike a trooper with
an unruffled conscience, or steal like
Hindoo, thinking the sole disgrace
connected Herewith consisted in be-
ing detected in the act. His capacity
for chewing and smoking was limited
only by his supply of tobacco; and
swearl A modern raftsman would
stand agape at the variety of Lige's
explosives.
1ige's sensibilities were not of the
highest order. Once when a minis
ter essayed to offer him some
good moral advice, Lige forci,
bly, clinched that good mans
hitherto uncertain belief in
his (Lige's) total depravity by
firmly and impolitely declining to
accept said advice, with jeers and
objurgations petrifying to the re-
cipient. Bear with Lige, dear reader.
Oaths and vile epithets constituted
the greater portion of the language
his baby life had learned when he
was toddling about, unheeded and
uncared for, amidst the filth and
refuse heaps of "Rag Alley"
So had Lige battled with the world
up to his tenth year; A. D. 1883, and
to the day whereof we write.
AS for Jim, read Lige's description
over again, and you have his story
told. In short, he was an outcast
and a vagabond, moreover,
his gratest delinquency was
that he was Lige's friend, steadfast
and firm.
Lige and Jim were in constant
open rebellion against school. To
them reading was torment; the
multiplication table a mockery;
while their untutored minds received
with utter incredulity the statement
that the earth of a surety revolved
on an axis. If any lingering doubt as
to the falsity of this strange tale OF
the earth's motion found refuge in
Lige's mind, it was forever crushed
by the crucial test to which he subject
ed the theory. He placed his fathers
familiar black bottle upon the top OF
the pump in the back yard, one night,
saying, with wag of his head: 'Ii
she 1.-THE earth) fops, the bottle'n
tumble, n that'll be the way ter tell. Il
she flops, n the bot busts, it'll be
with tn lickin', anyhow, ter find
out"
When Lige arose next morning at
daybreak, and ran out to look at
the bottle, only to find it just as he
had left it the night before, he ejac.
ulated: "nary q fopl" And ever
afterward the absurd theory of the
earth's motion was received by him
with a cynical sneer, born of superior
knowledge.
The unanimity of Lige and Jim, as
regarded their hatred of school, was
so great that the proposition of the
former Git was on Saturday this oc-
cured. but it would have made
no difference had it been
any other day. to leave
the dirty streets of the city for a day
of unlimited freedom. and a scamper
among the hills, with a dazzling
vision of the possible discovery OF
untold wealth floating before his
eyes, was received with rapture and
an enthusiastic "whoopl you bet!''
by Jim, and the luckless Pansy soon
found hsrseH hitched to her cart. The
arpa staaaaaO eserUded M insfda khe