The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1889-05-14
VAGARics THAT TROUBLE AND
ANUsE THE HOTEL CLERK.

-=s...- -. -. '''.-s- '---'ies-An Old
lad, Who Wanted tire Fire screen-A
Western business Nan Missed Ills wife.
Ml,nt Trap to Catch Thief
"lNo zee n great deal OF tho queer side Of
human nature. said Nsw York hotel clerk
the other day. "and tlnk absent minded
people give us as much trouble as ans other
elias. of customers. but there is generally SD
much 20 amuse one in their mistake chat
theg are willingly forgiven can generally
SPOT absent minded people by the quicknes-
with which they assume a preoccupled ar
whenever the conversation or their surround.
ings DO not interest them 10 Is not often.
however. that a perfectly sane and sober
man f0rzets his own name, yet such case
once came under my observation
SOME AMUSING EXAMPLES
a stranger 90 New York came IN here one
dav. seeming % be little dazei with the
hustle of the crowded streets He was one OF
that kind Of men YOU often bump against m
Broadway. a. he walks backward with his
mouth little open and his eyes fixed on the
% the desk pushed the register toward him
He took the pen. dipped &c in the ink, and then
hesitated. sc0wlei and then blushed Think
ing that perhaps ho could not write. pulled
tho register toward me % write DC myself and
,ad What namef I'M Dee han-oi 81 ]
haven't tsrg0tteu &C. bee said. as mad AS "a hat
ler looked no the man BOZ astoni,hmont and
said Give me your card This brought it 90
bis memory in flash Probably that part
Of bis thinker that recollected sounds was
taking q rest. but that part which rcmem
bered how his name looked when it was writ
fen ont was on duty
We had wealthy old lady staying with
ns last winter She was sitting in the parior
al alone musing in front Of am open CRATE
fire. one day. when sho began 20 call loudly
Tor the parlor maid Receiving no answer.
She rang the electric bell, which she could
reach without rising, SD long that thought
s1mething must Doe wrong. and | sent rwo bel
u0y. up stair. 'on the dead rum When they
reached her the Gre was burning iiercely. and
aer face was red with the heat and with boo
lignation Bring me the fire SCREEN she nl.
most screamed. such lazy servants ] never
saw have been calling for an hour Bring
me it at once before ANA roasted 90 DEATH
Certainly. maam, said one of the boys. with
"a grn. but mightnt you have pushed back
your chair a little Upon my word. She ro-
pllei. 4 never thought of that And then
She burst ont laughing IL my friends hear
1T this. she added they'll think I'm Zoo nay
lotage. and she gave the boys o half dollar
each and made them swear o. Keep DO an ID
secret
IL have known a man, continued the hotel
clerk. "t0 20 10 his room % dress for dinner
40 the house OF friend By the time bee had
got OF bis business suit the dinner bad van
.shed from bis mind, which was still running
on business and plans for the morrow. Tine
gas being it, and the process of undressing
evidently suggested bel time to him, for he
continued 20 disrobe, turned out the light
and cot into bed As bee did not appear no
the dinner. where bee was fully expected the
l0st teleploned down to the office 90 know ii
Sir D. bad suddenly be- % taken I'D or II $50
snew where bee was 4 boy went % bis room
aal found him sleeping s0uudly.
COMBINING BUSINESS WITH PLEASURE.
Il had fussy man OF middle age come here
last fall with a young aife. They were on
their wedding tour She was a timii, little,
pale, lonely looking, SICILY thing and kept her
roo nearly all the time Tie was outall day
visiting the wholesale places buying goods
i0l-his store iu a western city. thus comhil-
iug business with pleasure 10 thrifty Chi
cago way he spent his money freely though
and had no end Of trap. and trunks and par
GELS sent % the hotel When he got ready 10
start for home be counted over tho whole
pile with great care and checked them OH on
lis fingers. Look here, porter, he snapped
out, there's something missing 4 think
not, said the porter. what Is itf / don't
know, replied the bridegroom, obviously,
but / feel sure there's something else.
know I'm forgetting something. -Four Sara
t0gas, two leather trunks. one linen covered,
three big travelling bags, ono grip, two bun
dies in shawl straps, one hat box, bunch OF
sticks anl umbrellas-that seems 10 be all,
but / feel sure am leaving something be
mind and set can't think what il is We'll.
broke In, you'll miss your train II you de-
lay any longer II you discover your loss
wire us at once and well keep 10 Tor sou till
your return or send it % you Your wife
has sent down word that size is IN tine parior
and Ny wife, he calculated, Shaping
himself OF course. that's H. had forgot
ten all about her How absurd Well. the
laughs on me thisrime Gord-by
"One Of our steady patrons. however,
made nie laugh heartily the o,ler day lie
suspected new Cumberland OF stealing
little things from Ills room. and was soing
90 dismiss her az once lietnought be would
ise "a be- sire that size ua. guilty first, how.
ever. ard suggested that be leave marked
cOin lying on his bureau SeSt morning.
when Doe cane down. be said 4 improved
somewhat on your trick, old ml thought
that leaving one coin Do a conspicuous plco
would looA 50 palpably like the oil trick That
the cunning little fox might not bite at 10 at
all I'm keen judge u human nature, you
Eno" 80 just placed "A whole handful OF
small coins on the bedclothes, as II bad
been emptying my pockets and hat forgotten
them. and IL the girI's dishones sle'i tuiu1
size can take one or two pieces without tt2.s
being missed
II may be an expensive bait. however,
| said perhaps she viii scoop 10 all LlA
much did you leavef
by sove, be said. forgot T. count lt.ir
New York Tribune