Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1889-12-08

J
had much of that sympathy between hand
and eye which is so essential 10 good play,
and also that some of her strokes were
really mastery. ! felt, therefore, that u
would be quite triumph TO beat her. But,
unluckily. before we were hall way through
the General came in, and as had TO be IN
troduced 20 him, and as he proved TO DC
/ very prosy and lonC-winded, we were sum-
moncd to tea ere he had stopped talking, so
/ the finishing Of the contest had to bc post
poned TO more convenient season.
How got through dinner that evening /
/ have not the faintcst notion. But ! am
sure that my conversation. Improperly so
/ called, had neither sense nor sequence IN
! IT, ard feel fully persuaded that tho luck
/ less individual TO whose lot fell regarded
me as q duaer Of the deepest dye.
/ And yet still more startling experiences
awaited me, and ] was 10 be still further
mystiiied ere that day was DONE
I II had been arranged that they were to
/ have charade after dinner called The
/ Golden Wedding the General in one
Z scene, taking the part OF bridegroom, with
/ Granny for his bride; but unfortunately
/ at the eleventh hour he was seized with
sudden attack OF govt. which prevented
/ him from acting, and as | was the only ono
F in the house who was tall enough to look
in the least like him. with nv usual luck l
was forthwith importuned 10y everybody to
take bis place.
/ OF course protested velemently against
| such a suggestion, assuring all whom 1t
concerned that had no Mstrionlc talent
whatever, and was certain to spoil any
thing / undertook. But each of nv Objcc-
tons was overruled III turn, and when
Granny pleaded with me in her soft tones
I and told me | should oblige her 50 much if
/ | consented, and that ] should really have
nothing to do but repeat some words after
Mr.. FentOn, the clergyman of the piece,
( naturally had 10 yield IN the end, though
| cannot say / did so with very good
/ grace. Indeed so far from II. Tat
/ when ] found myself stepping on the
/ scene, disguised in gray WIZ and a fierce
white moustache. felt | was making such
aconsummate ass of myself that ] would
have drawn back even then If | could.
But such a proceeding was not possible,
for Davy, who was my best man, prOdded
me with pin and obliged me 10 advance,
and in a few moments more was kneeling
beside my bashtul bride, who, though l
noticed she had q very smart gown on. was
so closely veIled that | could not get
glimpse OF her features or see how she was
looking.
The ceremony thon began, bungl;ng
whenever it was possible for me to do so,
and after each blunder Dayy whispering
into my ear such remarks rs You're dong
beautifully. old mani ! had no idea you
had so much talent What a shame 10
have kept it in a napkin all this time!
and so on. until at last grew so savage with
him that | said in a smOthered aside,
Confound you. Dayy. If you don't Let me
aloneI shall collapse altogether :" Where
upon, fearing that such catastrophe
might ensue he did keep quiet the rest OF
the time, and soon atterward the important
rite was concluded.
Now, sir. kiss your bridel" said the
CLERGYMAN, who seemed 10 Toe in the lOcu-
lar vein. age is no bar. and of course
YOU know that kissing Is only out Of fash
ion when gorse is out OF bloom. and that
is never"
So, in obedience to this exhortation,
bent forward and proceeded with awkward
and unsteady fingers TO draw aside the
veil with which nv grandmother bad con-
cealed her features from view. But dl-
rectly bad succeeded in doing so ! started
back as if had been shot, for instead OF
the white eyebrows. gray curls, yellow
skin. and blue spectacles ] had expected 10
see, Isaw before me lovely blooming face,
framed in chestnut hair, with sweet red
mouth and laughing blue eyes, which, as
they met mine. were full OF condensed
mirth AT the bOundless bewilderment and
unspcaEahle amazemeDt that were depicted
IN every line Of my startled countenance.
Good heavens. what does il all mean?"
] exclaimed as soon as | could ind voice
20 speak. "Where am Z Who am /?
Who il everybody? Speak, somebody, be-
fore | lose the small remnant Of sense that
/ have left. and tell me am l awake OF
dreaming?"
Calm Yourself. nv dear fellow" said
Davy, patting me on the back in the most
irritating manner. " You are awake. though
/ cannot add very wide awake, and you
have merely been the victim Of a practical
Sol hot 10 oil II
proceeded nv tormentor, but you must
remember that the month we have Just en-
tered on is April, and, above all, that tins
is the first OF it, and therefore the legltl-
mate time for quips and cranks and jokes
and tests of every kind. and
But what is the meaning of it alp" /
cried, interrupting him impatiently.
What has become Of the old lady? And
who is it that has
OUGHT 10 have introduced YOU n due form
TO Miss Prittie Protheroe, the prettiest
Girl and the greatest hirt in the county,
and il should also have told you that our
reyerCd grandmother, whom she has per-
sOnated with so much success, ls upstairs
and has been bedudden for the last six
months"
no longer, II hope you won't mind what
Davy SAYS! Pm really not so bad as
that" cried my ci-derdnt grandmother.
It's merely that I've got good spirits, no
thing mOre.'
"Ah, you've been nicely sold!" ieered
Barry, who had just come in. Never saw
such an unsuspectiug, unresistlng victim
in my life. We all put our heads together
and laid a deep plot for YOU" he added.
and must say you fell into the snare like
a"
Like duffer!" suggested, in despe-
ration.
"Well. it would be hardly polite to say
that, but YOU certainly gave us no trouble,
and YOU did afford Us so much amusement
that feel we owe you vote Of thanks.
Prittie used to have rs in fits OF laughter
with her accounts of your revelations, and
she says you were so nice and confidential
to her -"
And as Barry uttered these words my
memory flew back over the weeks that bad
passed. and as | recalled all the strange
things Ihad said to this very young woman
under the impression that she was very
old one. / felt so overwhelmed with shame
and confusion OF face that the only wish |
was capable of forming az that moment
was tina. ,he ground would open beneath
my feet and receive me into It's friendly
bosom.
No such catastrophe occurred. however.
and the next minute ] found myself lead
ing my blushlng BRIDE INTO the supper
room and trying mean while 10 act and
talk like a rational being. But vain were
all my efforts, and so completely unstrung
was l by the startling discovery 1 had
Just made and theextraordinary turn which
affairs had taken that l moved ike
a man who was walking in his sleep
and spoke like one whose brains
were in that peculiar state called
wool-cathering. Indeed. my mind was
in such n whirl that / often felt in
clined to doubt the evidence of my senses
and to imagine that they must be PLAYING
me false. And with my ideas running
bither and thither and refusing to be sub
servieDt TO my will, my remarks were ne
cessarily so inconsequent and incOherent
that 1 feel sure Miss Prittie PrOtheroe
could not have found me a very agreeable
companion on that occasion, whatever she
might have done previously. And yet, as
she was the cause of the change, she ought
TO have made allowances for me, and this
| have every reason to believe she was
amiahlc enough 10 do.
Well. my story Is nearly told, but there
is q sort Of anti-climax to it which / must
relate before J lay down my pen, and
which came about ia the following man