Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1889-11-30
there fur.

Jerry Hammond, says l. speakin rather
rough and husky. we knows that you've got a
lot o money IN this house and we've come fur
it. We mean business, and there's no use
foolin'. You can give it to quiet and easy
and keep a whole head on your shoulders or
well lay you out ready for a wake and help
ourselves to the funds; and now you pays your
money and you can take your choice how you
do it. There's nothin shabby about us; but we
mean business. Don't we pardY That's So
says Putty.
"Look here says Jerry, Jest as cool as if he
had been sit.in' outside on his own curbstone,
i know you two men and no mistake. You're
Tommy Randall and you're Putty Henderson,
so you might well take off them masks
Which / am glad to do says /, for | hate EN-
and put mine in my pocket and Putty he took
off his"
Excuse me-" said Aunt Martha, interrupt
ing at this point but when Mr.. Hammond
mentioned the name OF Tommy Randall to whom
did he refer?''
81 can explain that. madam" said the tall
burglar, quickly This man by his criminal
course Of life has got himself into good many
scrapes and is frequently obliged to change his
name. Since L accidentally became acquainted
with him he has had several aliases and think
he very often forgets that his real name is
James Barlow"
That's So" said the stout man, :'there never
was a more correct person than this industrious
and unfortunate man sittin' by me. | am
dreadful forgetful, and sometimes l disremem-
Der what belongs 10 me ana what don l.. Names
the same as other things"
"'Well. now, jerry saws |, won needn't
think you're goin to make anythin by knowin'
us. You've got to fork over your cash all the
same, and if you think to make anything by
peachIn' on Us after we've cleared out and left
you peaceful In your bed. you're mistook so far
as I'm concerned, for I've made the track clear
to get out of this town before daybreak, and l
don't know when I'll come back This place is
gettin' little too hot for me, and you're my
concludin' exercise" Jerry he sat still for a
minute conslderin. He wasn't no fool, and he
knowed that there wasn't no use gettin' scared,
nor cussin', nor hollerin'. What's more he
knOwed that we there to get his
money, and If he didn't fork it over
he'd get himself laid out, and that
was worse than loosin' money any day.
Now boys says he. III tell you what I'll do.
IN make you an offer, fair and square offer.
What money I've got I'll divide even with you,
each of US takin' a third, and I'll try to make
up what l lose out OF my next contract. Now
nothin' could be no squarer than that How
much money have you got, JerryF says |;
that's the first thing to know I've got So 100
even, says he, and that will be Sl.033 80
apiece. I've got bills to pay tomorrow for
lumber and bricks, and my third will pay 'em.
If don't I'll go to pieces. You don't want to
TO see me break up in business, do you?' Now,
Jerry, says /, that won't do. You haven't got
enough to divide in three parts. Putty and
me agree to go halves with what we get out OF
o
don't make no changes Half of that money is
for me and half is for Putty. So just hand it
out, and don I let's have no more jabberin'.'
Jerry he looked at me pretty hard and then
says he: You're about the close-fsted and
meanest man l ever met with. Here | offer you
third part of my money and all you've got to
do is to take it and go away peaceable I'd be
willIn to bet two to one that It'll more than YOU
expected to get, and yet you are not satisfied;
now I'll be hanged If I'm going to do business
for no =
| No, won't says he. and he turns to Putty
| Henderson. Now, Putty says he, you've got
] pie more sense than this pal of yourn and
I'm goin to see If can't do business with YOU
Now, you and me together can HEX this Tommy
| Randall Just as easy as not, and II you'll help
me do 1T I'll not only divide the money with
you, but ii give you fifty dollars extra so that
instead of fifteen hundred and fifty dollars
| that's all he d given you, if he didn't cheat you
| you'll have sixteen hundred. and I'll have
| fifteen hundred instead OF the thousand and
! thIrty-three dollars which would have had
left if my first offer had been took. SO, Putty.
/ what do you say to that9 Now, Putty
/ he must have been a little sore with me
/ on account of the arguments we'd had about
/ dividin. and he was mighty glad besides
TO get the chance Of maxim fifty dollars extry
aud SO he said it was all right and he'd agree
/ Then thought 1t was about tune for Ele to
\ take III some of my sail, ana says i: Jerry
that's pretty good joke and you can take my
| hat as soon as get new one, but of course
/ don't mean to be hard on you, and if you really
have bills to pay tomorrow IN take third and
/ Puttyll take another, and We'll go away peace
i full No you won't sings out Jerry, and with
that he jumps out of bed right at me, and
/ Putty Henderson he comes at me from the
! other side, and between the two they gave me
the worst lickin' ever got in my born days.
and then they dragged me down stairs and
/ kicked me out the front door, and had hardly
/ time to pick myself up before / police
man about block of, and if he hadn't been
fat one ne d had me sure. 1t wouldn't have
been pleasant, for was a good deal wanted
I about that time.
! 80 you see, ladies and gents, that it's true
what said-things don't always 20 right In
| our line Of business more than any other
\ one."
Il think you were served exactly right" said
Aunt Martha. land wonder such an expert
| ence did not induce you to reform"
1T did, ma m, 1t did, said the burglar. 81
made n vow that night that il ever again had
to call in any one to help me in business Of that
kind I wouldn't go pards with him I'd pay
him so much for the job and I'd take the risks,
/ and I've stuck to il"
/ But even that don't always work. Luck
sometimes goes agin q man, even when he
working by himself. remember q thing of
| that kind that was beastly hard on me. gem
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