New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1889-09-22
THE TALK or TIE DAY.

Probably the most industrious fool and krnve com.
bned in the country IS the Ohio mar who recently
bought $40 worth Of postage stamps and is writing
a begging letter a day TO rich man in this ely until
his stock of stamps is used up.
Foregone Concuson.-C anvasser-I have aee
work
Master Of the House-I can't read.
Canvasser-But your children
Master of the House, have no children ltn-
umphantly). Nothing but cat
Canvasser-Well, you want something 10 throw al
the cat. lie took ft)-tLtfe.
Magazine Editor-of all the would-be authors ,ha
send their stuff me- scrIbbler Is without doubt ia
most versatile.
Asslstant-why, how is thatr 1 thought he wa
particularly dull
That is Just it; he can be dull in direction
than any man in the country"
One of the lady students OF the University CoIl.e
OF Wales at Aberystwith recently applied for post n
teacher at the Royal Naval School at Twtckenkan
The correspondence Of a character that gave Ia
but last week she received a letter signed ~ Leysl
Informing her that the fact OF your being C0n
gregaOnalst will be nsuperable objection TO yog
being on nv staff as all the members must be church,
.'-(London Christian World.
The largest county in the United States is Custer
County, Montana, which contains $4,000 square miles,
being larger in extent than the States of Vermont.
Massachusetts. Connecticut, Delaware and Rhode
Island. One tenth OF our present population could
find a means of livelihood in this one county, aud
Omaha Papa-So you are going to marry, are you,
my son? l presume the young lady you are TO vel
knows all about homework and looking after the wants
Omaha Youth-well you just bet she does. I wish
you could cotOn-battng dog she made last week
and some butterflies she painted on veyet-Omaha
World.
Americans don't coin all the verbal monstrosities
that appear 1t is The ST. James's Gazctte7 of Lon
don which brings out the word husbandicide.'
"Now that Pension Commissioner Tanner has re
sIgned,7 said editorial writer on Democratic daily
to his chief, against what member Of the Admlnlsts
ton shall we direct our guns"
We'll tackle Baby Mckee again. was the reply,
-(Pittsburg Chronicle.
4 writer in The United Service Magazine says
that the stones used for scrubbing the decks of ships
are called holy stones because the work was gem
orally done Sunday. But a writer IN INC
Churchman" says that they were so-called because
those who used them had to 90 down on their knees
to do their work
A Marked Exception lobson-Popinjay, believe
they say that in union there IS strength
Popnjay-Exscty have you any oblecuon 10 maka
to this well known sayingF
Huntington Free Press
The Rev. David H. Moore the new Editor OF The
Western Christian Advocate" OF Cincinnati takes hold
his work in a bright and breezy way hat will msks
every Methodist who reads the paper his friend.
She Glode-At noon yesterday woman stood at
the corner Of Fort and Grswold SITS. 10 take car for
the exposition grounds When one came along u wa:
course, and she walked It's length and back withou,
discovering ayacancy Iaen she fastened her eyes %
brought it down u charge bayonets' the OUTSIDE
man and shouted:
He tried It, but he was wedged and thercfor
jumped out and ran for the back platform, while she
calmly climbed up, squeezed into the space, and called
Vow let her glide .'-(Dctroit Free Press.
W. II. Cross, of Mlroa, Ill., challenges any IN
tho world TO sleep with him 142 hours for cash
He says he sleep more hours I'm 142 than any
other man. Now let some Philadelphia man take
him up and make match.
Great Scott. Marla!p exclaimed Chicago father
as he saw his infant son with the daily paper In he
chubby fist don't you know you mustn't allow that'
Why, what's the matter, James y replied ne
mother Tommy's amused and what harm there
What harml Can't you see that he Is likely 10
receive certain impressions regarding the Cronn case.
ana that when he grows up he will be disqualified mon
sitting on the jury II You women had your way ne
Cronn murierers would never come to trial1-tBoson
Transcript.
4 noteworthy admission on the part OF : The
Cburcbman, IS that the Episcopal Church IN the
United states has no hold, and Is gaining none, on
tho city populations
For,e ~ IIabit-New Minister TO seXt0nl-Weh
John how do you Ike my preaching on tho whole
Sexton-very well, sir-only mink you pound '''
oe1 New CMniScr-oh that's force Of habit John fOrs
Of habit. You see. I've always "Sou s"ios'sP
pen L Burlington Free Press
1t IS not generally known mat queen Ilc'orls
prebendary OF st. Dayds oaaneora, one 81 !,
I,,os ~ prehenday is TO oficiate In the chtrh AZ
s,o,o1 Zines but for OBVIOUS reasons the Queen has
not performed this duty.
p,oer, restimony.-"I Is there anybody rom 's h,
~ ,ha ear ~ asked the conductor, openmg sna
door and letting In about iorS '"o 'o'' -
| blizzard. -, tall iapk individual rising
| nm IN the seat next 30 the stove . o.. forward
UP ~, 20 yo, will be kind enough 10 come W ,hsrs
into the pullman car replied the eonase ra mixed
il lady there who has 10, ger hs wants an expeFs
| ~ .snarate Sem Huntington free ffoss