Waterbury evening Democrat., 1889-09-02

and to hold the same forever" That was just hke woman, and particularly like Sophia
 The emergency seemed to call for the practice Of extraordinary tinesse, so Le- ander importuned the advice of a trusted friend, Mir. Babbitt, a barber. Mr. Babbitt had worked in New York. Having shaved aldermen in the Astor House, he was prop erly regarded as 8 versatile and ripe scholar in the occult sciences. MT. Babbitt told Leander that parrots would eat meat, and that meat fed to parrots regularly would duly induce epilepsy, from which malady the victim would ultimately and surely die. This was good news, great news. IIeander began to dole out meat in preposterous quantities to tke parrot. Dinkety. The par rot relished the change of diet and was happy. Leander was happy, too.
 Lawyer Beebe was, as we have said, the parrots guardian. He came around one day to visit his ward and found the pam pered bird devouring highly spiced curry of veal. Suspecting foul play, the vigilant attorney laid the matter before the probate court, and, after taking a vast amount of | expert testimony, the court reprimanded Leander and ordered the parrots diet changed back again to soda crackers and cuttlehsh. This seemed to discourage the parrot a good deal; but think of what Le- | ander's feelings must have been. The parrot went back to farinaceous food; after that the only fresh meat it got was an occasional morceau nipped stealth 1 fly and unostentatiously out of Leander's l unwary thumb or exposed wrist.
 1 About this time another embarrassing complication arose. The parrot had been young, but now it began to mature, and all ] at once its palate and vocal chords devel- oped functions of an extraordinary char acter. The parrot began to croak some what, and then it began to mutter inco- ] herently, and finally it began to articulate and to phrase.
 l One morning Leander was awakened by 8 voice calling: "Leander! Leanderp' He sprang out of bed terrified, shivering. ''Merciful heavens!" he groaned. 'It is my wife-she has come back from the gravel"
 Then the voice called again-and it was unmistakably Sophia's voice: "Leander, git up! Leander, git move on yep
 It was not Sophia, however-Sophia was dead and buried: nor was it Sophia's ghost. It was Dinkety, the parrot. You see, the bird had not talked before, because it was too young to talk. AS soon as it got old enough to talk it spoke the words most ia miliar to it-words it had heard Sophia ding l at and into Leander day after day, week after week, month after month. This was natural enough. There is nothing new under the sun. Dinkety did simply what we are all doing.
 The task of picturing Leander's misery were vain for Hs to undertake. Inadequate to that task, we shall simply say that Leander suffered-suffered for days, for weeks, for months, yet suffered in silence, | for the austere horrors of the probate court had terrorized him. Perhaps-ah, who shall say-perhaps he was somewhat buoyed up by the dim and twinkling hope that some time false wordD his reward would be harvested iu the death-the nat ural but none the less righteous death-of this wretched bird. At any rate, Leander
 bore his martyrdom mutely.
 "It must be-" said Lawyer Beebe, ever and anon; Sit must be 8 sweet consolation to you to have this perpetual reminder of
 your sainted wife-to hear continually the
 echo of deceaseds voice and to feel that, al
 though she lives only in the spirit, the en-
 dearing epithets with which Sophia's
 melodious contradict caressed your ears are
 still preserved by this inspired bird
 Leander, you are tho blessed beneficiary ot
 a special providence"
 Leander never made any audible answer
 to congratulations of this character. Blu:
 his face spoke volumes, and even then the
 sentiments that surged in his bosom were
 not half spoken. Meanwhile, Dinkety, the |
 every particular except that of the flesh
 A demoniac activity had now succeeded tt
 that semi-comatose condition which charae
 terized tho earlier years of the miserable
 bird. Sometimes it thrust it's cerulean heai
 out between the bars of it's zinc cage anC
 shrieked: "You think you're going to gel
 my money, eh? Leander, Leander, I'll foo
 you yetv' At other times, standing upor its adamantine beak and rasping the all ! Ixv,;<b tho ure cried: ''Never marry for money
 Leander-never marry for money!' Ther again-but why Shumerate the thousand preposterous tortures which the heartIesl reptile inflicted upon Lcander? Hour after
 hour, day after day, week after week Dinkety, the parrot, performed it's aero batic monstrosities and shrieked shrilly thu , old time objurgatlons and reproache which Sophia had used so industriously. ,, "I will bear it patlently," said Leander t
 himself. My time will come; the parro will die natural death and then the s2O, ,OO shall be mine. Ishall be happy then-ricl and happy-and I shall have a parrot fo
 dinner every day!"
 But one morning while Leander was reae , ing Q newspaper he turned pale an , trembled violently. His eyes caught a article headed s'Facts About Parrots" Tn |, article started out in this wise: "At re cent meeting of the French Academy Fro1
 Achille Savin- -Brillait made the interestin
 statement that ornithologists were no, agreed that the life of the average parrc . exceeded one hundred years"
 a Leander gasped; just then he heard voice-his Sophia's voice-rasp out in fill
 like tones of exultation: "Never marr
 for money, Leander-never marry fo ,. money!"
 n Leander gave it up then and there. B l. gathered himself together, proceeded to n cheap lodging house, rented room, turne a on the gas, went to bed, and died miserabl Il of O broken heart. By chance as he d. ,- parted from his own house he left the fror ,- door open and @ vagrant cat, wild wit n hunger, entered and after a three hour Y battle vanquished Dinkety, the parrot, ar Q ate it. So, after all, Dinkety died the deat # natural to parrots, by which we mean
 violent death, which, we aver, should P. natural to parrots even though ornithologis ;. and probate courts hold otherwise. ;. The minister who preached Leander