The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1889-03-23


/. .,,rv,vor Of the famous Light
f3riaader is now plumber IN Iuu,
polis. He still knows how 10 ona
Terre Haute Express. who
-..Harlxins is man WI"
always holds fast to the truth .ls :. es
notice he never lets II e'-
:. ma him. n-Drake's Magazine.
doctor (who has q large idea o. ma
own skilD .Indeed, / have never meas -
complaint from one OF my pa',en asor
Hostess-.I don't doubt 1t, doc'v,-
The errors Of physicians are gehe'
buried with their patients.
--Spelter-"What a woman you or
n RIM on when you get started;
can't get In q word edgewise. MrS
S-"Notwithstanding that your iaa
,,,scs Il so exceedingly thin. IL Is
funny; that's fact ''-bosson
script. ,v,t.
r.a IN France for testing steel railway
tires q succession of blows similar 10
those delivered by means OF a sleuso
hammer are given to the tires IN l,'a 10
on their wheel centers and revoiVeu on
rollers.
-.sWill the coming woman run ~
a political Officer asks an excnanse
She may, she may, but she ougns e.. -
know how to run for a horse "a. A ~
When she has mastered that at'' sno
might stand some show OF runninS ~
an Office and getting there.
-"Well. mother" said the prince
kissing the queens hand affectlona.e.y"
chow is Kateg' ''KateP" querled VIC
toris. .what Kate "Abdicate. re-
torted the prince. with roar OF laugh
ter that loosened the rollers on tne
throne. And her majesty wept'-N'
Y. Ledger.
-Bauble (severely:) Miss sharp
son. understand you say That my a.,
tempts at wit are simply laugnaoie.
..Miss Sharpson with much humiiityJ
-..My dear Mr.. Bauble. | Withdraw
nv words. To call your jokes lsugna-
BILE is to grossly misrepresent them.
assure you. Accident News.
Two New York swells quarreledv
and one expressed himself thus:
"Why, do you mean to call me liar!
mo, SIR" said the other. II should
not like to call you liar, or any gen.
tleman a liar. At the same time, II 1
met you walking with Ananias and
Sapphire. / should say you were in the
bosom of your family"
-Winks-"Must leave early to-day.
l met q lady who was an old school
mate of mine. and she was SO anxious
to see my family that invited her to
accompany me home to tea" Minks-
..My gracious! Your wife will raise the
roof" 20, no! My wife is quite pretty,
and this lady is exceedingly plain. -
Philadelphia Record.
Mrs. Sneer-"No, can never tell
when my husband has INDUCED too
much at the club" Mrs. Queer-"I
can" Mrs. Sneer-"H owp Mrs. Queer
when he is tight he asks for kiss,
and 1 never knew him to do SO If he
was sober" Mrs. Sneer-"Perhaps he
drinks to screw up his courage for the
caress." (There Is now war between
both their houses. )-Town Topics.
| when q man dies suddenly. with
out having been attended by doctor. !"
says popular guide to the law, 1.-THE
coroner has to be called in and an In
quest held to ascertain the cause Of
death. But adds the writer, when
he dies after having been attended by
= doctor. everybody knows why he
died, and an inquest is not necessary
IN. Y. Ledger.
The End Of the Honeymoon
Young Whe-"How the world moves
There's Bessie Gray, an old chum o.
mine. graduate of the normal school
has just entered medical college
She will soon be able to write M. D.
after her name. Women are coming
TO the 'front.' l tell you. Formerl,
girls were taught nothing but house
keeping" Young husband Yes
and now they're taught every thing blu
housekeeping. Boston Courier.
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