The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1889-06-27
DISPENSING A TRAMP.
What Happened to Those Who Under.
took 1t.

was eating dinner at farm house in
Indiana when one OF the children came
in and announced that highway tramp
had called at the kitchen door and asked
for bite to eat. The farmer was very
short, very fat and very bald headed
man, and he was postmaster at the cor
ners and justice of the peace in and for
the county. He had son called James,
another called Moses, and hired man
who was addressed as Towser. He sent
out word for the tramp to sit down and
rest, and as laugh went round the ta-
BILE he explained:
"After dinner I shall be pleased to
show you how we encourage tramps in
this section. This is evidently a new
man to this part Of the state, or he would
never have called here"
After dinner we went out. The tramp
was sitting under cherry tree, looking
as comfortable as you please, and evi.
IDENTIFY unsuspicious that anything ex.
cept dinner was in store for hin. He
looked to me like bad man to fool with,
but the farmer didn't seem to read him
that way.
"Now then," he said, as he rubbed
his fat hands together, "you will stand
up"
"What fur ?" asked.the tramp.
"To be kicked l am going to boot
you from this spot down to that slivered
telephone pole"
"But object"
"Can't help that. AS fourth.class
postmaster OF the United States OF Amer
lea I command you to arise"
"If / am kicked somebody else will
get hurt |" cautioned the tramp as he
got up.
"As one of the Justices of the Peace
in and for this county command you
to disperse," said the farmer as he turn
ed the tramp toward the gate and ad-
ministered kick.
Next instant he received left handler
on the nose which knocked him into a
confused heap on the grass, and the
tramp got out Of his old coat and pre-
pared for business.
"Towser, pulverize him!" shouted the
farmer as he struggled to his knees. "In
the name of the United States / com.
mand you to knock him down"
Towser advanced, his big fists doubled
up, but the tramp danced to the right
and the left, and then sent in one on the
hired mans commissary department,
which doubled him up and laid him
among the hollyhocks.
"James, Moses, make him prisoner"
yelled the old man as he plucked a
handful of grass and held it to his bleed.
ing nose.
The tramp chuckled. There was fun
ahead.
The two boys were strapping young
fellows, strong enough to knock down an
OK, and they were willing to 60 in. AS
they stripped off the tramp backed up
between two currant bushes, where they
could. not flank him, and as they ad.
vanced upon him he grinned all over.
He played with them for a minute or
two, and then drew long breath, made
three or four feints, and piled them on
the grass together. Neither moved to
get up for full two minutes. Meanwhile
the tramp rested and looked over to me
and queried:
"You amt one of the crowd?"
"No."
"And don't want me to disperse ?"
"Not particularly"
"All right. I don't think the United
States and his gang want anything more
of me just now, and as have an engage.
ment down the road, I'll move on. When
they get washed up and the bandages
on, tell 'em used to scrap with the
boys in Chicago in days gone by, and
that I held myself in and let 'em of
very mild. Good.by. Ia, ia, old fatty =
And he had been gone ten minutes
before the postmaster came over to me
and whispered:
"Did you ever l''-Nep York Sun.