The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1889-05-04
PuNeENT PARAoRAPAs.


: IT used to be said that there is no
fool like an old fool, but that was be-
fore there were SO many young Ones
A Russian novelist was recently |
arrested on suspicion of being impli-
Gated in plot. They read his works.
He was discharged. Puck.
Teacher why do you not punctu
ate your compositions" Pupil-"Be-
cause you told us the other day 1t was
vulgar to point. Boston Gazette.
Utah can not come into the Union
because of too much marrying. Some
States ought to go out because OF too
much observation-disclosures Enquirer.
First Critic--'.They say that when
Hamfat plays Macbeth he is not salts
fed with killing Duncan" Second
Critic-..No; he murders Shakespeare
America.
-Dalbey-'I am proud to say never
had an enemy that didn't get square
with" wagfall-..If you would only
pursue the same plan with your friends.
Dalbey, several of the boys would be
sporting new spring overcoats. "-Ierre
Haute Express.
-"Darling," he said, II can not
show my great love for you by rich
diamonds and jewels. but you know the
strong, manly heart is a gem OF no In
significant worth. Eyes, 1 know
that - she said. "but you wear that on
your sleeve. Life.
-..My DEAR" said the good wife. as
she looked over to where her husband
was counting up his losses on the cleo
ton, s.who is the fool killer the papers
are always talking about?' How do
L know" he queried, savagely; IL
never met him." mo, James," she
responded, softly. 81 didn't suppose
you had"
Miss Blight met Jennie Cash
croft to-day. She told me. by the way.
that she never allowed Cashcroft to
, kiss her until after they were married"
Miss Spite-"So he married her out Of
curiosity. suppose. If you had only
tried that plan last summer, perhap:
. you might have been Mrs. Cashcrof'
{ yourself, dear."-Terre Haute Express
Catching a Tartar. = Physician
: (arousing tramp one morning from
: nap on his doorstep)-"Here, what Il
( the matter with you? Can't you mov'
8 more livelyP" Tramp-"rm feeling
pretty bad. boss, and can't be expected
$ to move in a hurry" P.-"What'
! the matter?" Tive been at death
r door all night. Boston Budget
Most Wallpapers nowadays con
t tain arsenic, some of them in sucl
t quantities as to justify the sensations
g headline, death on Parlor Walls;
2 but you might set that line in letter
y sixteen inches long and explain tn
y danger in column after column
h double-leaded BREWER, and yet you ca
Il not brighten the young men away bt
n fore the half-hour clock had struck on
,, Understandable Journal.
n you look tired, Miss Brown; to
l. much daucing?" 20, dear, no; but "
Of gave what is called an engaged dil
y ner,' last week. where eight betrothe
I'd couples were invited, and afterwart
they each retired to eight differel
n corners of the two rooms and whispers
I'd all the evening, and it reminded pal
I'd and mamma so much of their courtsh
it that they went out and sat on the stair
u and left me alone. Do you wonder
ar still look tired" -Time.
q. A public dinner.-Brown is seat
Do next to Smith, whose shirt-front is de
De GRATED with three magnificent diamol
cn (?) studs. Brown-''Excuse me, Smit
"a. but / can't help admiring those stu
OK of yours" Smith-"Yes; think tn
OF are pretty good" Brown-''Don't y
ID think you run great risk with ther
N. I suppose you have them insured
raj Smith-s.Insuredp No, should be 81
ire to do so, but there isn't a company
III existence that will take a risk OF tn
sm sort" Brown-"My dear fellow, b
10 your pardon-there are several pla'
an glass insurance Offices in New York