The Grenada sentinel. [volume] (Grenada, Miss.) 1868-1955, 1889-08-31
.OLIVER SUDDEN ("
,..os a Humorous Account of a
.Ouack' Texas Doctor.

Gives a Humorous Account of a
.Quack' Texas Doctor.
SAN ANToN1A, TEXAS, Aug. 96, 1889.
ErlroR SENTINEL.
Texas, is, I presume the most cosmop-
,Gtan State in the union. { l expect pc =
Sans @ that should have written "unio I"
Nth r;th capital U, but I have never yet
L..ome reconstructedly patriotic enough
y spell nation with a big N, or get
S,unk on the fourth Of July.) The idea
hat intend to convey by the use of the
word cosmopolitan in the above sentence,
i that the population OF Texas comprises
,apresentations from all parts of the
earth: l like to be thus particular, be-
cause / do not intend to convey the i'm
weston that there are people here from
ome other world than the earth. do
hot state, however, that there are now
rltramundane immigrants here, because
h 40 OF know but if there are any such
4 have not met them. l would not be
nfraid to bet, though, that if there are
pnv such folks anywhere on the earth
4ley will be found in Texas. If Texas is
HE most cosmopolitan State in the un-
,n-as | believe-then San Antonia is
tbe most cosmopolitan city. 1t seems
slso to be mongrel, in its population, to
yery marked degree. There seems to
he perfect babel of tongues here, which
+ frequently rather unsatisfactory to q
man with an inquiring turn of mind who
uses only one language, and very plain
article OF that. As matter o + course
|the Americans here generally speak the
English language, especially those who
bre immigrants from some other States.
Nearly ali the old Texans, thoug hand
ksually their children also-speak Span.
isb, or rather Mexican.
This Mexican language, as spoken by
Abe Greasers, bears about the same rela-
tion to the Spanish language that the
dialect of the uneducated corn-held net
gro does to the poorest English. There
are q great many Germans here, and
that language runs the Mexican close
race for second place.
There are papers published here, both
in German and Spanish. Speaking about
the mongrel or mixed feature Of the
nopulation, reminds me that the Mayor
Of the city is the son of an Irish man
and Mexican woman. He was born
here and SO is native American, and
speaks Spanish as fuently as he does
English. Although native born Amer
ican would not know where to locate
him. ethnologically. On one OF the
principal streets of the city is swung. a
sipnboard on which is painted, in capi-
tai letters, the following legend
.Polski! Sklep.
Habadrowndrestfcht Klbsunjrgrk.
Chacourlplgi Ethlndebmttrkspsght."
By the sign being hung up in a con-
spjcuous place, / presume there are peo
ple here who can read it, but OF course
thew are not Americans, l have never
been able to find out whence they came
No American ever tries 10 read the
above sign. At least none do who have
got any sense. There was a young dude
college graduate tried 20 read it last sum
mer. He not only tried to read it bu
actually had the cheek to attemps tn
n
pronunciation. As matter OF course
resulted IN iuxation OF 'le suo>aIn,, :.a.hnn:,
or dislocation OF the lower Jawoph.
This left his dudeship. in a sorry pngnn'
He couldn't shut his mouth ana D
couldn't open it any wider, and h
couldn't talk, and he couldn't eat, an
in fact he couldn't do anything bu
rroon and roll his ewes, and hasten t
his boarding-house, the worse worse sa"I scar ,
man that ever did make Dutnea looi :,
himself. He finally rallieo sumcieh'' !l.
to be able to write down on tne sue
the house, 'send ior q aoc!oi, +, ~ ri 7
A messenger was hastily dispatcheu . W..
orders to Carol the tlrst asctof e he iouu fouu
on the range, ano the ,irSI one n,a n 90. oun su1
was the last one IN tile worio 'or Su'
an emergency. ,a;o., oo,,eo
He had never seen mea'cai co,ies ',,.
or any other college except .lo WIS oa
the exterior. Had never aad nea.u q nh ,h
cal lecture and always con.ena' CIV a,o,I m
"nattermy" and 'ngoliergy Mas nb;, M
ing but humbugs by the aiu .. WI, ;an'
quacks imposed! upon hones1 o.0.d W. ~ :
rant humanity" ne als0 .p0 eApie'sser sor .,
contempt IN unmeasufeo terns ~, ..or o.
doctor who had TO use a uneInoI0e'' y =
ascertain the fetrlle condi1i'n VI ".0a, T
tient. Said man VINO naa 70 ssuOp '.os
such mechanical conIii'anos; s;,;ra H.
more ''ftten' to practlce , meaioine M w.
"bob:tail yaller oawg. ny "Is 10,
old practitioner. and had ouriea nu