davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25
PERSONAL AND PERTINENT.

President Harrison is about as uneasy
as the German kaiser.
the shah of Persia has started for
home. ALI Europe cries: ''Shah.
there; stay thereW
Gen. o. Guitar. of Columbus, Mo-, is
at Deer Park. He is visiting ''Steve"
Elkins. There's music in the air.
Lord Tennyson and Robert Brown
ing are about to lombard the public
with new volumes of poems. Is Brown
Seuuard responsible for this?
Gov. Taylor, of Tennessee, the fiddler,
wants to be a United States senator.
Would the grave and dignified senators
swelcOme old Resin de Bow"'
Mai. McKinley's campaign for the
speakership has received severe set
back through the open advocacy of eX-
Speaker Warren j. Keifer, of Ohio.
Queen Victoria has sent to Prince
Bismarck life-sized portrait of herself.
This Is pleasing. Bismarck was afraid
she would send him an India shawl.
An Indian named Gabriel, living in
California, is said to be one hundred
and fifty years old. 1t is evident that
he has never had anything to do with
California law courts.
President Harrison has leased his
house in Indianapolis for three years.
He will need it again at the end of that
period if the leading politicians of his
party are correct in their surmiSes.
Secretary Window has started out for
a three weeks vacation. Window has
worked very hard since he took his
present Office. The Baltimore Ameri-
can says that Republican office-seekers
are well satisfied with Window. Can it
be that this is considered high praise?
Speaking of Gen. Boulanger, Edmund
Yates says: ''Since his condemnation
he has received sackful of sympa-
thetic kilograms from all parts of the
world. The chiefs of his party continue
to fit between Paris and London with
phenomenal rapidity. and political pill
grimages to Portland place are more
frequent than ever. Gen. BouIanger's
sole anxiety is to secure the inviolabil-
ity of the ballot, and he maintains that
his election can only be invalidated by
the chamber itself. He believes that he
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25
HUMOROUS HITS.

Adam was the first man to be hung in
f-i-g.-B0ston Transcript.
A summer resort phenomenon-the
longer man stays the shorter he gets.
-Terre Haute Express.
Strange is slang. 1t is just when. you
''get on" to thing that you tumble. ="
Boston Courier.
Rheumatism is a thorough-going af-
Fiction. 1t goes to the marrow Of
things.-Binghamton Republican.
A Judge need not necessarily be hand
some to make "fine impression" on a
prisoner. -Pittsburg Chronicle.
The Duke of Flies marriage has put
him in queer position. He is not his
wife's equal. and yet he is her peer
Baltimore American.
An American In Paris writes that the
bills are frightfully high in that city.
Even Buffalo Bill is ''loOked up to- by
the higher classes.-NorristOwn Herald.
At PATHS farewell performance in
Buenos Ayres she was called out thirty
two times. Any man who takes his
wife to the theater can do better than
that.-PhiIadelphia Times.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25
will succeed. in spite of the strength
and influence of his adversarieS."
TALK OF THE DAY.

An apron trust is threatened, and all
the young men want to sit down on
it."-Yonkers Statesman.
When man and bull in an open
lot are both making for the same fence,
it is toss-up which gets over flrst-
New Orleans Picayune.
Wicked Suitor-Did you go 20 dress
parade this afternoon, Sal? Sail went
to church. Wicked SuitOr-Well, that's
what mean.-Life.
pretty maid is nice to see,
Ana she is nice to WOO;
But II matters not how sweet she be
IL she isn't sweet on YOU
Rochester Sunday Herald.
y! guess III take my vacation over
again, If you have no Objection,'' said
flashy young clerk to his employer.
mot the slightest, sir. You can make
it permanent. "-Hartford Post.
A pertinent question: 81 would like
to ask you a question:" said gentle
man to fellow who was spreading him
self over four seats in crowded rail-
way car. ''What is it?' "What brand
of nerve food do you ?"-Epoch.
Couldn't Help It.-Omaha Teacher
| shall have to punish you for being
late to school. Tardy Boy-It was
Johnny Smiths fault, who lives next
door. His pa was going to give him a
lickln' and had to stay and hear him
howl.-Omaha World.
A personal reflection: Bifkins-I
don't see why you should grumble at
the hard times and so on, when YOU
have such bright prospect before you.
Bifkins-Bright prospect I'd like to
know what it is! Bifkins-Why, your
nose for inStalce.-Grip.
An FISHERMAN man, armed with a re-
volver, rifle. bowie knife, SluDg shot and
brass knnekles, was asked If he was
going West to exterminate Indians.
mo-" he replied. Pm only going to
Oklahoma to edit newspaper. / can
get pens, ink and paper out there."-
Montana Herald.
About the Size of lt.-Ald. Buhdl-'I
saw you comforting with Congressman
ShOuter this morning." Aid. Dedlock
why, yes; he said we ought to get
together" Aid. Buhdl-"Get together
on what?" Aid. Dedlock-"On keeping
him in office, 1 suppose. He declined
to discuss principles for fear of causing
discOrd. Puck.
Nellie OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES poor
dear! What narrow escape! And
what started the horse?" Gussie lin.
neutrality-suspicious. know, Will was
just helping me out of the buggy, and
the stupid horse could not tell the diff
ference between a-goodnight-kIss and
signal to start. And he just-started.
Some horses have so little-sense." -
PittSburg Bulletin.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

fashion is established. and must be ac-
cepted in America. The beard has held
the ground only in very recent times.
Still, the priest who wants the beard to
grow must have special dispensation.
Before the war whiskers only had the
undisputed field. 1t is related that in
one case court refused to hear law
yer because he had beard. But boards
won in the war, and were crowned with
the mustache. Whatever the event
with the beard since, the mustache has
steadily held its place, like fierce senti-
mel at the gateway. Now it must go.
A smooth face Will add to the prosperity
of the razor scrapers, and perhaps re-
lieye osculatory annoyance.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25
WHAT WOMAN CAN DO.

A student of the sex exalts woman
and covers man with contempt thus:
She can come to conclusion without
the slightest trouble of reasoning OH it,
and no sane man can do that.
Six of them can talk at once and get
along frst-rate; and no tN o men can do
that.
She can safely stick fifty pins in her
dress while he is getting one under his
thumb nail.
She is cool as cucumber IN half a
dozen tight dresses and skirts, while a
man will sweat and fume and grOWl in
one loose shirt.
She can talk as sweet as peaches and
cream to the woman she hates, while
two men would be punching each
others heads before they had exchanged
ten words.
She can throw stone with a curve
that would be worth fortune to base
ball pitcher.
She can say mo" in such low voice
that it means yves"
She can sharpen lead pencil If you
give her plenty of time and plenty of
pencils.
She can dance all night in a pair Of
shoes two sizes too small for her and
She can appreciate a kiss from her
husband seveDty-fve years after the
marriage ceremony is performed.
She can go to church, and afterward
tell you what every woman in the con-
gregatiOn had on; and. in some rare in
stances, can give you some faint Idea
of what the text was.
She can walk half the night with a
colicky baby in her arms without once
expressing the desire of numbering the
infant.
She can-but what's the use? A
woman can do anything or everything,
and do it well.
She can do more in minute than a
man can do in an hour, and do it better.
She can drive man crazy for twenty
four hours, and then bring him to para
disc in two seconds by simply tickling
him under the chin, and there does not
live that mortal son of Adams misery
I. H. X
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25
ANII-LEAN DOSES

A great deal of fault can be found
with a aefaulter.--Pittsburg Chronicle.
The boy who goes barefooted has
many bootless chase Washington
Capital.
The man with a boil on his neck
never borrows trouble. He has enough
of it.-Boston Courier.
The shepherd dog is not game ami
NAL, though he is progressive ewe-cur.
Terra Haute Express.
1t is believed by leading jewellers
that the proposed diamond trust would
be glittering succes5.-Philadelphia
Press.
Mr.. Oyster is making great stew
about his being bounced from the pub
lie printing office at Washington.-Bos-
ton Herald.
1t matters not how it is regarded, the
shooting of Judge Terry was another
victory for the American Nagle.-Bing-
hamton Republican.
The latest fancy in dresses is what is
called a surprise gown. Doubtless the
surprise comes in when the bill is pre-
sented.-St. Louis Post-Dispatch.
Nine. Patti sang "The Barber" at
farewell concert recently. but there is
something about 1.-THE Barber which
suggests the next. "-Yonkers States
man.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25
Oh ARITY.

A beggar died last night. his soul went UP
to God, and said:
ST come uncalled; forgive 1t, Lord; died
tor want of bread"
Then answered him the Lord Of Heaveo:
s'Son, how can this thing De7
Are not my saints ON earth? and they had
surely suceored thee"
ssThy saints, Lord" the beggar said, 'live,
holy lives of prayer;
How shall they know of such as we? we per-
ish unaware.
They strive to save our wicked souls, and fit
them for the sky; ):
Meanwhile not having bread to eat Gorgive)
our bodies die" 81
Then the Lord God spake out of heaven in
wrath and angry pain:
so men, for whom My Son hath lived. Ny
Son hath died in vain.
Arthur SYmons.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25
NOTHING TO DO.

Nothing to decentralization of bliss!
To feel lazy luxury's lingering kiss;
To drift with the hours nor attempt to with
stand
The sweep of old Times irresistible hand.
When existence is ended l asked not to go
Where some long golden stretch tires the eye
with its glow,
Nor puzzle my mind with the flats or the
sharpS
Of anthems celestial on aureate harps
'Twere better by far to recline near some
grove
Where even the winds stop to rest ere they
rove;
Or where tall grasses nod as the breeze letters
through,
And laugh while they whisper of nothing
-Philander johnson.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25
THE BEARDLEss AGE.

The beard must go, with all the con-
tiguous hirsute incidents. 1t is re-
ported that the ukase has been issued
in the halls of authority in Europe that
the ESAUs must become JACOBS. The
returning tourists will probably follow
the styles over the water and set the eX-
ample on this side. Whether the change
was ordered by congress of BARRIERS in
Paris is not definitely stated, but TO-
600 of them met in convention in Ger
many to celebrate the victory. The
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

other and got divorce. Then double
marriage was had, and the good and bad
were sorted up just as in the original
marriage. To add to the uniqueness of
the situation. both wives had children
born few months after the last mar
riage. There is moral or two in the
history somewhere,
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

only class of people who have the means
to buy them is said to be the Jews, and
that country would hardly tolerate them
as the landed aristocracy. fhe govern
ment will be loaded with Improbable
property if it has to buy them in. 1t
woul d be peculiar situation in any
other country.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

A FARMER in Nebraska refuses to
paw an Omaha real estate dealer $50 for
procuring him wife, OH the ground of
generalization. 1t would be ungener-
Gus to preSume'tbat this could be made
a common allegation of Omaha material
for wives, but the job lots are probably
worth less.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

THE free public baths in Philadelphia
are enjoyed by thousands every day in
the hot season. No doubt the time will
come before the millennium when every
large community will have ample pro-
vision of this sort.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

A $500 SILVER SET has been exhib-
tied in the window of WANAMAKER's
big store in Philadelphia that is to be
presented to ex-Commander J. P. REA
at Milwaukee Tuesday. 1t is gotten up
toy Pennsylvania soldiers.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25
Mistaken A stout ge
walking gu
for Grover. Park row on {

Mistaken A stout gentleman,
walking quietly up
for Grover. Park row on Saturday,
says the New York
Star, attracted considerable attention.
Boys turned around to look at him, and
men nudged each other and whispered,
"Grover Cleveland" Deputy Coroner
jenkins was standing at the window of
the coroner's Office when he passed, and,
as soon as he caught sight of the man,
exclaimed, Halo, there's Grover"
With friend he ran down the stairs
and started in pursuit of the gentleman,
who was disappearing up Park row.
When the two reached him the doctor
lost his courage, but his friend add
vanced boldly and tapped the man on
the shoulder, saying, pardon me, Mr..
Cleveland, but -"
II am not Mr.. Cleveland" was the re-
ply. ''but have been mistaken for him
about fifty times already to-day
DR.. jenkins and his friend apOlOgiZed,
and withdrew somewhat discounted.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

A LUCKY politician, who is offered
$4,000 for his job, has the contract for
the new postal cards. There are to be
three sizes and 2,0OO,0O0,0OO of them,
which are supposed to be sufficient for
four years. The number shows that
they are increasing in popularity.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25
TO-DAY,S WEATHER.

WASHINGTON, Aug. 24.-For Minnesota:
Fair, generally cooler; winds shifting to
westerly. For Dakota: Fair; generally cooler
northwesterly winds. For Iowa: Fair; sta
tionary temperature, except in western por'
ton slightly cooler Monday; southerly'
shifting to westerly winds. For Wisconsin:
Fair; warmer in northern, stationary temper
allure in southern portion; southerly winds.
GENERAL OBSERVATIONS.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

NEW YORK CITY is about to invest
100000 in new pavements. Asphalt
is to be laid in the residence streets,
and some of the business streets where
the noise of the granite is very annoy
ing. Good paving is one of the attrac-
lions of city.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25
Well Posted.

Owner of bar-What experience have
you had?
Applicant-Served three years in a
Maine drug store.
He got the lob.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

Government A member of one of
the most prominent
Bonds Safe. firms in Wall street
was asked about the
alleged Syndicate" to keep up the
price of government bonds and force
the secretary of the treasury to raise the
limit at which his purchases are made.
This talk about a bond syndicate"
said the gentleman in question, "is as
unfortunate as it is unfounded. 1t
simply creates an impression that
there is antagonism between the secre-
tary of the treasury and the heavy hold
ers of government bonds. There is no
organized concert of action among bond
holders, for if there was we and other
houses similarly situated, would be likely
to know of 1t. The story took shape just
as such rumOrs do, and some OF the
daily papers have seen fit to announce,
as if it was an established fact. that a
syndicate or pool or what not was carry
ing from S15,OoO,O00 to $20,000,000 of 4
per cent bonds for the purpose of fore
ing the treasury to take them at an adj
vanced price, Now, it is we'll known
that the floating supply of bonds is
smaller than it ever was. The treasury
itself has bought within short time
from S5O,OO0,O00 to S60,000,000 of 4 per
cents. 1t is safe to say that the market
was never so bare of bonds as it is now.
There are fewer governments by far
available for sale to the treasury than
there were at this time last year. The
holders of bonds, of course, looking at
the conditions, feel that higher prices
are justified. But there is no syndicate,
and if there is any pool it, perhaps, con-
sistS in a few operators getting together
couple of hundred thousand dollars or
en- of bOndS.O
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

EUROPEANS are credited with the
ownership of some 100000 acres in
this country-more than double the area
in Ireland owned by English landlords.
1t is matter to think about.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

GEN. SHERMAN is at Redwood
Springs, and said to be rivaling the ex-
PLOTS of JACK the Kisser. He is at
times crusty with old soldiers who want
to talk about serving under him, but he
never wearies of his speciality where
the girls are pretty and don't chew gum.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

THE preachers are beginning to re-
turn from their vacations, and people
will soon resume their religion. The
Salvation Army works on like the devil.
1t is reported that he never takes va
cation.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

Four brutes were hung in New York
Friday for cruelty killing women, yet
100 women were refused permission to
send flowers to them. They were 100
fools, and no retraction will be made.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

TRr WEEK1Y-O DAILY : Monday Wednesday
and Friday.l an
1 yrin advance 81 90 6 mos. in adv " w
3months, in advance. 81 W.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

AS WANAMAKER is continuing the
old rates to the Western Union, the
place where he sat down on monopoly
does not show signs of disaster.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

THIS is about the only conspicuous
country in the civilized list that has
good crops this year. 1t is able to help
out all the shorts at the highest figures.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

THE e. A. K. will begin to convene at
Milwaukee for the encampment to-mor-
row, and it is expected there will be 49,
900 or more there during the week.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

SOME three years ago the Russian
government established credit bank
to loan money to the nobility; whether
to encourage them in extravaganza and
break them down, or for their relief. is
not exactly plain. At all events, it
seems to have had the effect first
suggested, as it has already fore
closed on 1000 of them, and will
sell their estates at auction. The
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

A CHINESE play in San Francisco has
reached the end of the second act in two
weeks. There are four more acts. Prob
ably they go out between acts like Nell
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

DAILY AND SUNDAY.
I Tr IN advanceS1O 90 mos. in adv. 50 SO
en-. in advance 5 90 weeks in adv. 90
One month .S5c.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25
No More Wind in Their Sails.

Time.
Base Ball Manager Ito club directors)
Gentlemen. am very sorry to say
that our chance for the pennant is lost,
and our only course left is to disband
the players.
Directors Gin chorus)-Why?
"Our coach has dislocated his jaw.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

SUNDAY ALONE.
Vr In advance So 90 mos. in adv SOC
6 m. in advance L 90 1 mo. in adv 2Oc
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25
GOSSIP OF THE DAY.

Davis by the Senator Cushman K.
Davis, of Minnesota,
Seaside. has been visitor at
Manhattan Beach. The
senator reached New York Friday night
from st. Paul, and he will return to-day,
says New York paper. Il wish 1
could afford to take things easy" the
senator said to me. "When congress is
being poor man, / am compelled to
put IN all the time possible at my pro-
fession, and real vacation is thing to
be dreamed of, but never realized"
Senator Davis is one of the leading
members of the bar in the MOI Invest.
In personal appearance he resembles
Gen. B. f. Butler in many respects.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

L We lOSE IL III the SAND.
By its mastery work of the last eight
or ten days the Chicago aggregation Of
ball players has greatly strengthened
its grip on fifth place. Chicago Tribune.
If Chicago will "pluck a few feathers
from the wings of her Imagination and
stick them in the tail of her Judgment"
she will discover that she has no earthly
chance for the worlds fair.-St. Louis
GlObe-DemOcrat.
Sunday School Teacher-Now, Bobby,
why did Moses strike the rock?
BObby-'CauSe he wanted water.
"Well, we don't have to knock on the
rocks for water now. do we?'
mo, ma'am. but you have to knock
three times for beer on Sunday" Time.
All! husband, do not scold your wife
And make her poor heart ache
Because she can't build pies II Ike those
Your mother used to make.
That is, unless you're quite prepared
To see the whole thing through,
And buy her hats and dresses as
Her father used to do.
Ripley Tribune.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

THE fellow who sent the Prince of
Wales $4,000 anonymously may not be
on the way to the insane asylum, but he
is loyal idiot. The amount will be lost
in a few of the debts of the extravagant
prince, while it would be real bene-
faction if judiciously expended for the
suffering and unfortunate.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25
Local forecasts: Fair weather..

TWAS warm enough yesterday, but
1t is safe to wager that it will be cold
day when the new opera house is in
augurated this year.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

Rejected communications cannot be pre-
served. Address all letters and kilograms 10
THE GLOBE. st. Paul, Mimi.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25

WEEKLY ST. PAUL GLOBE.
One Year. 81 six Mo. Csc Three Mo. 35c
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1889-08-25
Hurting the
Business
Community.

Business ury, has left Washing
ton for two weeks
Community. vacation. He is re-
: ported to have said
during brief sojOurn in New York, en-
route to his resting place, that no change
was contemplated in the financial policy
of the treasury. The money market has
been excited and loaning rates are adj
vancing. Money is going steadily to
the West, and if there is no alarm in
financial circles there is certainly no
seems to have no interest for the Secre-
tary of the treasury. He has not con-
suited the bankers of the metropolis,
and he is apparently satisfied with his
policy.
This may suit the thick-and-t thin sup
porters of the Harrison administration.
Some of them are applauding what they
are pleased to term the ''secretary's
firmneSS." According to the Philadel-
phia Press, which may be taken as a
sample of them, Mr.. Window is right
eOusly defying gang OF Wall street
spectators. The fact that the mer
camille community suffers from finan-
cial stringency more severely and much
sooner than the spectators of Wall
street, is fact of which both the Secre-
tary and his journalistic supporters
seem to be ignorant.
But that is the exact state of facts.
When it comes to a choice between
lending money on stock collat-
eral and on the credit of merchant,
money lenders reject the latter. That
is what is in progress now, thanks to
Mr.. Window. 1t can be stated on ex-
cellent Republican authority that Mr..
Window is simply pgtting veto upon
one of the best prospects for autumnal
business that the country has seen in
many years.