The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1889-05-24
MIR. AND MRS. BowsER
MI. Bowser knows IL All. So Tries
His Hand at Spring House Clean.

ing.
Detroit Free Press: What did those
two colored women want?" inquired Mr..
Bowser as he came in the other evening
just as the individuals referred to were
passing out.
They called to see when l would be
ready for them"
How ready2"
ut is spring. you know"
well what has spring, you know
got to do with two colored women."
II have got to wash a few windows
and take up a carpet or two."
"House cleaningY"
mo, not exactly, but then"
"See here, Mrs. Bowser, this thing has
got to stop right here and now! Because
some 200 years g some old cranky
houskeeper in New England felt Obliged
to rip and tear an upset the house for two
or three weeks in April, all you women
of today feel obliged to keep up the Gus.
TOM
But everybody cleans house more or
less"
Cant help that. I'm not going to
have everything topsy.turvy around here
for the next three weeks. That will be
the result If you put two women at work.
They will spin out the job as long as pos
sihle."
ut won't take yer q week"
"a week. 1t shouldn't take one dayl
1 can go at 1t and do all the cleaning nee
essary in one hour!''
l didn't say anything further until
after supper. Unfortunately for me one
Of the women returned to ask about a
matter she had forgotten, and Mr..
Browser saw her and said:
Are you n of the women who are
going to house clean here?'
Eyes, sah."
excuse me, but / don't believe It'll If
there's any cleaning to be done Ill do ii
myself. You needn't put in an appear
ance here tomorrow MOI any other day"
AN you's gwine to clean house?'
she asked in surprise.
II am. | know it does not belong TO
mans estate, but l have a young and in
experienced wife who is easily imposed
on, and am going to prove TO her that
this house cleaning business is all a
fraud"
"Mr. Bowser," l said, as he returned
to the sitting room, didn't you have an
experience last spring."
Yes, ma am. | experienced this house
from top to bottom in just two hours,
and tstill remains the cleanest house in
Detroit. | have nothing particular to
do tomorrow, and shall take hold"
IL can't help you any,"
| StNVhon T u1ont ., =, l,,bJa ,.ss-
will ask for it, Mrs. Bowser. AS l am
feeling in good spirits this evening, |
might as well begin on that coal stove.
ready to go into the barn in the morn
ing
went up stars just as he pulled of
his coat and spit on his hands. / knew
Just what a muss he'd make, and l didn't
want to be there to see. In a few min.
utes | heard the clatter of the stove pipe,
as four or five lengths bounced around
on the floor, and three minutes later
there was a yell for help. l ran down
Just as the girl got in from the kitchen
MIR. Bowser was lying on his back on
the floor, and the stove was lying on Mr..
Bowser. He was almost black in the
face as he gasped:
Take him of-take the blamed thinp
off of mel"
The girl and l succeeded in lifting i.
high enough for him to roll out, and h.
sat up and groaned and swore and threat.
! ened dire things.
81 was afraid it would be too much fo1
you," | said as l offered him a we,
towel.
ooh! you werel How kind of you
You are disappointed because the infer.
nal thing didn't knock the life out Of
me!'
l went up stairs and he rested a while.
Then | heard him moving the furniture
about, and by and by he came up to say
II want some salt to put on the carpet
before | sweep"
But that carpet must come up Mr..
Bowser. It's heen down two years"
That's all nonsense! Mother never
lifted a carpet until it was worn out.
Where's the sa,tf"
But the curtains must come down,
the wood work rubbed with a damp cloth.
the windows washed, and"
"And the roof of the house raised ter
feet, of course, One would think wee
had small pox in the house. I'll get the
step ladder and take the curtains down.
Perhaps I'll take the carpet up tomor.
row, but it's q waste of time"
He went down and got the ladder, and
l heard him whistliDg as he worked a,
one of the curtains. His whistle presently
cut short off, and there was a crash and $
yell, and l flew down to find Mr.. Bowsel
lying across the end Of the lounge which
still remained in the room. His ewes
were closed and / thought him dead from
his fall. got the camphor and the CIR
flung water in his face, and by and by he
gasped and opened his eyes and family
asked:
"Is this heavenf"
NO, Mr.. Bowser," l gently replied,
"this is only spring house cleaning"
what has happened" he continued,
as he rose up.
you had a fall"
"And while l was unconscious you
took advantage Of my condition to take q
So bill from my walletl'
II never thought Of such a thing!'
"Well, I can tell later on j had a
sensation as of some one feeling in my
pockets. I'll have that curtain down il
it takes a leg"
Won't you please give up your Quix.
otto idea, MIR. Bowser? No man car
clear
Cant, Ell? Well, In show you tc
the contrary. Quixotic idea! I'll show
you and Quix, too, that l can do morf
house cleaning in an hour han you car
in q week. Get OFT of my way
while-t'
He was in his slippers and he picked
up a big tack, and that ended him. he
was half scared 10 death for fear of lock.
jaw, and he insisted on going to bed and
sending for a doctor. The good mar
heard what had to say and then OBJ.
served:
"Mr. Bowser, don't you leave you
bedroom for at least a week to come.
That foot must have perfect rest"
And next day l sent for my co,ored
women and began work. We are not
through yet. Neither is Mr.. Bowser out
of his room. He sits with his foot on a
chair and we have left his room undis
turbed. When / enter with head tied up,
a big apron on and my fingers red and
bleeding from tack wounds and bruiges,
he consoles me with:
Such a fuss over nothinpi Why,
had four-ffths of the work done when