Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-11-23

daughters develop their own individuality and
sense of responsibility, the sooner they will be-
come valuable citizens.
But the annoyance and distress of the mother
at the transformation of her children into
active, independent young women of the world,
is as nothing compared to the contemptuous
condemnation of the old maiden aunt In her
heart no transmitting glow of affection tempers
the judgment of taste. She cannot imagine
what young women are coming to" or what is
to become of society when all the girls succeed
in turning themselves into bad limitations of
men," For her part she does not see that girls
are any better OF happier for all this rushing
about. this binding of their eyes and running
their compilations with hard studyI 1t is no
wonder the men are frightened away or grow
too familiarl When she, the speaker, was
young, no gentleman would smoke in the pres
ence of lady; now-blank silence alone can
express the terrible reverse. All chivalry had
vanished; killed out by those who prohted most
by it
Marriage would soon be almost unknown, and
women, having renounced their real power and
pr1vilege-the charm of helplessness, innocence
and grace-are obliged to give in, shamefuIly
and shamelessly, to the coarser and lower tastes
and fancies of the stronger sex. When the
maiden aunt was a girl, women ruled in their
drawing rooms. and men sought Tor her mana
Tin dancesD with eagerness and impunity. Now
they scarcely took the trouble to write her
nieces names on those ridiculous programmes
which introduce the vulgar Tigidity OF business
into the ballroom. Oh, the girls might SMILE
DuI SD6 was on IQ6 SlQe Oh anu OOOChSys
Moreover, none of them. no mere modern
girl, would be capable of the refined devotion
which kept her forever constant TO the memory
of one dear departed adorer, even TO the
injury of her material interests-but dellcacy
forbade her dwelling on the theme! How
could any man, she wouldtask hor n1ecee. ele-
vate into an ideal q masculine creature with
opinions as strong as her boots, and on the most
unladylike topics into the bargain! No, she
really does not know how things will arrange
themselves hereafter between men and women,
And though the girls do laugh heartily at
Aunt Dorothy-hardly waiting till her nack Is
turned-the question she propounds involves
perhaps the greatest problem of the future
how, with the inevitable development OF wo-
men-ther new needs and aspirations, will
modns Yibendi be found, by which the sexes
can get on comfortably together2 Nature, IN
exhaustible and infinitely adaptable, will no
doubt solve this, as she has done many other
enigmas
That the experience of parents may be of
valuable assistance to children we do not for
moment deny, but the value is doubled when
mother tries to put herself in her daughters
place. and apply the dear-bought knowledge OF
bygone years to the new conditions OF an ever
developing society. The duty children to
parents is profound and binding obligation,
but on the other hand the debt due from parent
to child is still more obligatory.
On the helpless unconscious creature you
have called into existence you have bestowed
the awful gift of life. To be, to do and to
suffer will be its unavoidable lot; perhaps to be
burden-a curse to itself and all connected
with it; perhaps to be a stay and a blessing to
its comrades on the toilsome march from the
cradle to the grave. To these involuntary re-
cruits in the army of martyrs which life enrolls,
what thought and care do not parents over
How abundantly they should be supplied with
materials of war. How vlgilantly trained in the
use of their weapons. How well instructed In
the science of the warfare which they cannot
avoid. How strengthened that they may stand
alone!
There is, however, another side to the medal.
The daughters. too, must look to themselves
and keep guard against sundry tendencies
the unavoidable outcome of the increasing
knowledge and freedom which modern educa-
tion bestows. The first and most offensive OF
these is a certain contempt for their elders,
which generates doubt as to their ever being
right on any point sit is only one of my
mothers fads" ''Ohi mother forgets the world
is changed since her day.
True, my young wrangler, or successful COM
petitor in localsexams., but the world has not
been re-created. Certain old veins still streak
the social amalgam, old quicksands still make
certain passages unsafe, and for these unscien-
tifc experience affords the best guide.
Your mother has seen more sorts
and conditions of men" than can pos
sibly have passed in review before
your youthful eyes. She will perceive indica-
tions of truth, reliability, selfishness, treach-
cry or weakness, which no amount of mathe-
matical or classical training can teach you. Do
not turn from her counsels. or believe that all
knowledge can be gathered from books and
blackboards; and more, do not mistake hard.
ness for strength. 1t will not weaken your
powers of self-assertion or resistance to imposi-
tion, if you remember that the mother you
think so narrow and old-fashioned has borne
the burden and heat of the day; for few years
you were all her own; she was all the arbiter OF
your opinions. tastes, aspirations; she never
dreamt the day would come when you would
leave her ideas and convictions far behind, and
sail with flowing sheet into new ocean of
thought.
Do not press the thorn of indifference too
rudely and sharply into her loving heart, for
loving it generally is in spite of little sharp
outbursts, the efferveScence of wounded affec-
ton and innocent vanity. Look kindly at
whatever is best and wisest in her; credit her
nature with these, and put her narrowness. her
rigidity, to the account of the training and
influence under which she has been reared.
To youth belongs the kingdom of this world
and the glory of it; we, elders, must abdicate
as years roll on. Strive as we may to keep in
touch with the bright young creatures on whom
we have lavished our love and care and life,
they will break away from us; they will only
give their full confidence to their fellows; we
cannot learn their shibboleth, nor keep step
with them on the upward march. Nor per-
haps can they give us all we want. What do they
know of the joys and griefs-the triumphs-
the heart-breaks we have enduredf The friends
who seem so charming to you are tireSome old
frumps to them! They do not know the magic
of mutual memories, albeit they are busy &C
cumulating such stores themselves. Let them
go free and when they feel there is no attempt
to clip their wings they will from time to time
throw us such crumbs of sympathy, of conf
dence, of esteem, as may serve. to brighten
the gathering shadows of our way as we de-
scend into the valley.
Nor need we wait with outstretched hands as
though begging aims, nor whining for cUmpas-
sion.
We, too, have done our WORK. We have
borne the noontide heat, nor shrunk from the
wounds and roughness of the conflict, so with
heads erect and hearts bravely resigned we
salute the colOrs of the young troops who,
starting from the vantage ground we have
won for them, carry on their standards to new
conquests in the great dim future, which our
failing sight cannot pierce.