davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1889-04-03
1t Makes You Hungry

did ten years ago. The winterof 1Sss-s9 has left
the nerves all tagged out. The nerves must be
strengthened, the blood purified, liver and
bowels regulated. Paine's Celery Compound
tte Spring medicine of to-duy-does all this,
as nothing else can. Prescribed By Physicians,
Recommended by Druggists, Endorsed By Ministers,
Guaranteed By the Manufacturers to be
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1889-04-03

A BALTIMORE barber makes the as
sertion that mans beard grows faster
in bright weather than in cloudy. He
thinks that the sunlight has the same ef-
feet on the hair of mans head and
face as it has on plants
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1889-04-03

AN enterprising resident of Langres,
France, who has been arrested for
shooting at his sweetheart, made love to
the jailer's daughter. She assisted him
him to escape, and the pair then eloped.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1889-04-03

A BUSY doctor in Scranton, Pa, sent in
a certificate of death to the health Of
icer, and inadvertently placed his
name IN the space TOR 'csuse of death. :"
This is what might be called accidental
oxactneSS
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1889-04-03

HAVE used MAGEEs EMULSION with graf
flying results, and shall continue to use it in
my practice. T. S. Wilcox, NJ. d. Santa
rian Hospital, BROOKLYN
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1889-04-03

"'BRowN's BRONCHIAL TRoCHEs are
widely known as an admirable remedy for
bronchitis, hoarseness, coughs and throat
troubles. Sold only in boxes.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1889-04-03

ACCORDING to a California paper one of
the tramps of the santa Cruz chain gang
wears kid gloves when sweeping the
streets.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1889-04-03
Food for CONSERVATIVES.

SCOTS Emulsion of Cod Liver Oil, with
Hypophosphites, is most marvellous food
and medicine. It heals the irritation of the
throat and lungs. and gives flesh and
known. 1t is very palatable. having none of
the disagreeable taste of the crude oil.
AN Augusta, Me-, man hada bill for a
little more than 81 against the War De-
partment. After writing for it several
times he received an official reply stat
ing that it would be paid as soon as con-
Vaniant
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1889-04-03
Paine'S
Celery Con1pou

is a unique tonic and appetizer. Pleasant to
injurious effect, 1t gives that rugged health
which makes everything taste good. 1t cures
dyspepsia and kindred disorders. Physicians
prescribe it. s1.00. Six for $500. Druggists.
WELLS, RICHARDSON Co.. Burlington. vt.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1889-04-03
The Best
Spring Medicine.

ain the spring of 1887 was all run down.
would get up In the morning with SO tired q
feeling, and was so weak that could hardly get
around. boughta bottle of Paine's Celery Com
pound, and before had taken 1t a week ] felt
very much better. can cheefully recommend
it to all who need a building up and strengthen
ing medicine" Mrs. B. A. Dow, Burlington, vt.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1889-04-03
MI have used Paine,s Gallery compound and IL

~ COulpouuu duu LII
has had a salutary
erect Itfnvigorat-
ed the system andI
feel like a new
man. 1t improves
the appetite and
facilitates diges-
tion.n j. T. COPE
LAND, Primus, s. G.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1889-04-03

With Extract of Malt and Compound
Syrup OF Hvpophosphites, Cures Con-
sumption, Bronchitis, Coughs, Colds,
Scrotula and all Wasting Diseases,
Tt is as pleasant and palatable to take
honey.
Its strengthening effects are almost i'm
me Cliate.
1t does not come up to assert itself semI-
occasionally after being swallowed, as
other Emulsions certainly do.
1t is q great producer OF BONE and MUS
Gle, it purifiex the Blood, and patients
gain rapidly in weight while taking it.
1t is a true Emulsion, the only one tn at
is always readv, always alike, and that
never has thick, gummy and greasy
BLOB at the top to upset the PATIENTS
STOMACH.
Its used in all the leading Hospitals.
1t il prescribed by the most eminent
physicians in the United States and Canada.
Asksyour Druggist for it, and take other.
j. a. MAGEE & CO., Lawrence, Mass.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1889-04-03
SPRING BIRDS, SPRING FLOWERS,
SPRING MUSIC. A 4R H3 INST

M uAiV mUN1Us AT HAND.
MUSICAL SOCIETIES and Choirs do well who
round off the season with the practice of CAN
TATAS or Glee Collections
Among many good Cantatas, we publish
Thayer's Herbert and Elsa Csc, &c. y ger doz)
Romberg's Song o f the Bell (60c, S.. 40 per d.
Bucks 10th Psalm, (s1.00. $500 per doz.)
Butterfie1d's Belshazzar, (S1.00, $500 per dz)
Anderton's Wreck of the Hesperus (S5 cts,
&. 75 per doz
Bucks Don Munfo, (S15O $3.50 per doZ.)
Trowbridge's Heroes of 10. tSl00, $500 doz).
Hodges Rebecca, t65 c's., $500 per doz)
Andrews Ruth and Isoaz, (65c, Sc. 90 per dozl
School Committees SuperintendentS and Teachers
cannot do better than to adopt our Ne,C, Tried
and True School Music Books
Enerson's Song Manual, (Bk. /, so cts s.
doz. Blk 2, 40 cts, 81 20 doz Blk. g. so cts, 81 so
doz) thoroughly good graded series. United
Voices, 100 cts, s.. so doz) Good School Songs.
Song Harmony, t60 cts. Sc. 90 doz) For High
Schools. Children's echooI Songs, (S5 cts,
$500 doz) Charming book for younger classes,
and many others. Any book mailed post free
for retail price.
LYON q AEARN rAfo~~~
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1889-04-03

0sHMVHO DfEo Nerer Fhdi Al,UGgs s'trei
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1889-02-09

carS ana what q that wbsn a. - -
. good talk in the interest," a ~ rUV1GC
Mr.. Mctcalf set out, arrived, 0ws ~
chnt, took tho car again, and cana 49,
But" timidly advanced, ''WAat bool
Of the review during all this timer
"Ohi hsufFcred nothing from ny ateu
said It, editor. II installed mypae q
tabls In tho car, where was abls 10 ou1I1
my work at my easa When ~ seuoro
tho stations, posted my isttsrs, and ssno<
received kilograms with - lit&ls dlDeun1>
In New York;
''Bus could you really work sssny = I
trainf'
"Better, much better than q ny 60
desk, my dear sir, there was no ~ - 80
and disturb me.n d
Twas one day relating thh ccuvseme1u1 1<
an American journalist
"You are simply wondsrful, 20 -
icans" said to him; "you would - ~
Sandwich Islands TO fetch nsws oe - ~
at Honolulu"
'Just So" he replicd-"l have doe -
This II havo done Il" was The 0nnIol
touch. ~
A follow passenger on my iast txip = &
Gcrmanic was New YORKER whov =
morning Of the day the boat was 10 n1l
home without the least intentiou q 9on1
the Atlantic Having made up his ~
noon, he telegraphed 10 his wifss S0u)I
walt dinner, am OF to Europe, bought & -
and few neccmaries for ths Voyage 9
calmly embarked At half past . foe Enzo|
American wives are used 10 this M q
thing, and think nothing Of n
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1889-02-09

their defeat with - much bravery a. they
had displayed In tho struggle. aud overy one
goes once more about bis business
The English have the habit Of making
themselves at homo everywhere, but above
all In places where they pay. Nothing Is 20
repugnant to them as those thousand and
one little tyrannies that 60 BY tho names Of
regulations, restrictions rules by laws. ctc.
II you would be unhampcred BY such, u ron
would enjoy perfect freedom, live In England.
No one doubts that England Il the frcest
country on earth, not even our stauchcst
French rcpublicanS
A few months before his election 10 tho
presidency Of the French Republic, N. Jules
Grsvy was present one evening At political
dinner In the beautiful mansion Of the vicou,-
tcsso de Rainncville Az this cpoch things
scarcely seemed 10 point TO tho future cleva-
ticn Of n Grevy, and II the Orleans princes
had displayed littlo moro resolution, M.
Grevy would probably never have known
any other palace than the one In which his
pieadings failed TO keep tho magistrates
awake
After dinner, In tho elegant smoking room,
ono OF tho guests drew N. Grcvy aside aud
said to him:
swell, sir, seeing tho turn things aro TAX.
ing, havo you not enough Of tho republlcr'
"On tho contrary, l have just returned
from country where havo learned to ap-
prcciate Il moro"
"where Is it you have beoni to switser-
landr
"No, q little further"
"Not American
"Oh, mol"
I'm what country can you have strength.
cned % much your republican idcasr
" havo just returned from England rs.
piled NJ Grevy
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1889-02-09

scccunb every wssk, and u I sver ind .
cont missing VIII knock your teeth out"
"Did hs find any deocit In your accountsF'
"0ns Saturday night cos'ld not balance
the bookA was 1s cents short Without .
word my husband struck mo In the mouth.
Six Of my teeth wcrs knocked out fswal-
bowed two~
Have you the other four In courtr'
"Yes, dr."
MARK them Exhibit B." said the judge.
Eventually the divorce was granted.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1889-02-09
CHAPTER xxx.

Nothing Is ordinary In America.
The ordinary American himself Is extra
ordinarily ordinary.
He takes liberties with hs fellow creatures
and with the English grammar. He murders
your ears and tho mother tongue Of Shake.
spoare
Ho chews, hawks and spits; but he has
certain good humored brag and livelincss
which invite further acquaintance.
His fingers, cravat and shirt front sparkle
with diamonds
In conversation no attacks all subjects i'm
aginabls with complete assurance He talks
tall and through the nosa He docs not raise
his voice much. He buszes rather than
speaks; at certain distance you think you
hear the droning Of bagpipca
This man, whom you began by taking for
some ignorant babbler, presently gives TO
his conversation turn that astonishcs you.
He speaks to you Of Franco In q why which
shows you that ho Is conversant with all that
Il going on there Tho sayings and doings Of
Gen. "Rolangcre" are familiar 10 him. He
knows tho names Of the chief membcrs Of tho
Fronch ministry. Ho d interested In NJ.
AosOcuT rosoaTcucSi no uus reuu q review
and an account Of NJ. Ernest Remains last
book and Of N. vlctorien Sardous latest
play. He has judicious remarks to mako
upon literature. Ho knows his Shakespeare,
as not one Frenchman Of his class knows Cor
neille. Racine, Moliere, or Victor Hugo You
discover that no Ia well read. this man who
says como for came. you was, you didn't
ought, don't know a. do, etc. He can
give you information about his country, as
useful as II Is exnct
THIS same American talls theology. He
discusses the Bible. Ho reads the writings Of
Col. lngcrsoll, refuting that gentleman's Ideas
or accepting his conclusions
In word, you thought you wero In tho
company Of an ignorant bore OF q bagman,
and you have had ono or two hours talk with
an intelligent and interesting man.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1889-02-09
CHAPTER XVIII

The president h tho most accessible citizen
In the great Republic Of the New World.
Three times . weck hs tlesccnis to the
ground door drawing room and p1ssca an
hour shaking hands with. all who wish to
make his acquaintance There cannot be .
man In the world who docs 20 much hand
shaking a. this president of the United States
You enter the White Houss at the hour Of
tho public reception as you enter church at
service time I NV there negroes, market
women who had left their baskets In the ante
chamber, all sorts and conditions Of men. II
, the most democratic sight Imaginable.
Mr.. Grover Cleveland, already respected
and looked up to, three years ago, for his
talents. his seal and his integrity, has seen his
popularity grow greater every day since he
united his destiny with that Of the most
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1889-02-09


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anu .oe 'u'e 'epeaeed-and 20 on win
Ac '"o s'oScr' ano al tno iadys
~
49, Sa' cnors oe1ns made now IN
~ Sn'oaso .no o'ncr towns 70 nnd
w ~. : ~~. ~ ~ sc0'O1a.o tne serv'ce IN ressau-
80, 80 ~ 10y ~'n ws,,s~ very
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| s.".,. a.a,NS'
r-- = o '"AS " :. oo'n'
-, ."a'a "osu~' WIN snaii
a.-..Ns...s" -. ...S" Ao'e IN d'rccs
LII. W" y. .s ~. .o ~us. W u'oans Q.
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.S... .,asr "as NJ. NJ ""'s" ."e customer seeS
49, - 80. % on enop VeSe1"-
s.s,. 49, w HY 'oueu" .ses TOUT,
80, uS p" ""' "Pte'''e' anu 'ne
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~ spo. 'n0'n' 'ue'e mo va Perpeeuai
'c.'o"' " ''"no Ia'
opp~ my "'nuowr ~ tno '"cneheu
- ~ ~ Ssos "lo va rAu"sy s'"'1on'
-" '.aAu. " ~ '"s 'o'a' ''a'"s ca'n"
no wen1 Haen ''me tne oeii announced tho
sPproecn OF uAn, saw crowd tear along
'ne pain on tns s'auon ana leap ineo tho car
.,age'' taxing .nem " STORM. by leaving
'neir OUNCES na'f minute carrier, tncse good
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1889-02-09

= SceA q the respect tnAt ne must iu1Je
even In those who abhor his doctrines His
house h the homo Of tho purest joys; IL holds
four hearts that bsat as one
Mr.. IngersoI lives In one Of tho handsome
houses on Fifth avsnua His family consists
Of his wife end two lovely daughters. Athens
and Venice, - an American ~hoin met at
Col. lngersulls used to coll Them Indeed
one reminds you Of the beautiful creations Of
Titan Tho other secms liko NEUROLOGICAL
vision, q nymph from tho hanks Of Eryman-
thus A you look at her, wh;lo she speaks
to you with her eyes modestly lowered, al
most seeming to apologize for bcing 30 lovely,
you involuntarily think Of lie Jeunc Ma
lade" Of Andre Chenier, that last Of the
Greek poets, as Edmond About called him.
Authors, artists, journalists, members Of
the thinking world Of New York may be met
st the coloncls charming Sunday evenings.
About II at night, when all but the Intimate
friends Of tho family have left, these latter
draw around their host, and entice him to
talk upon one OF his favorite subjects, poetry,
music, or may DO the mistakes of Moses,n
while they listen with avidity. Hc knows
his Shakespeare as thoroughly as the Bible.
only he speaks Of him with far more respect
end admiration. He adores Wagner, whom
he sets even above Beethoven. I mention
this to prove onco moro that wo have all our
little faults, and that Col Ingersoll, in COM
man with his fellow mortals, IL not perfect.
Between midnight and in the morning, the
last visitors reluctantly depart On the way
home, you think Of all tho witty things that
have been said, the arrows Of satire that
have been shot ut hypocrisy and huntug,
the eunobling humanitarian opinions that
have been advanced; and though you may
not feel converted. or diverted, or perverted
to Ingersollism, you are sure to leave that
house feeling fuller Of good will toward all
men, and saying to yourself, "What de-
Aghtful evening have passed."
was present one evening at meeting Of
the Nineteenth Century club to hear dis
cushion on "The Poetry Of tho FIXTURE" Col
lngersoll was to have taken part in It, but,
being retained professionally at Washington.
be was obliged to excuse himself at the
eleventh hour. The president Immediately
telegraphed to well known minister asking
him to take the colonel's place
~ distinctly decline to take Col Ingersoll's
place In this world or the next" exclaimed
the recipient Of the telegram as soon as he
had read it The reverend gentleman never
theless took part in the evenings debate. and
when be repeated bis repartee to the audi
ence was greeted with hearty laughter and
applause.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1889-02-09
CHAPTER xxxn.

To show the point 10 which hts1lsso
activity goes In America. eassnot % bsoo1D
than spoak Of the Nlnsessuth Century -
Two Or three ysan ego Mr. CuurtnnnD| d
Palmer, one Of the leading inhah1tan1D ~
New York; gentleman - rieA = ~
tcllcctual attainment ~ IN dollass-e{
cetved tho happy Idea Of inviting ~
friends to meet twice . month d ~
drawing room for the purpos q d.
Ing the important questions oe The day. ~
invitation was accepted With alacrity, -
thus the club, which eousists Of LADY mGnsf
bers a. well ~ gcutls1nsn, was formed
Tho association proceeds IN . mann9 ~
simple a. Il h practical
Is Il decided. for instance. to pan N svuuuS
Ing In discusing socialism, The prssidsab tE )
vites q well known sociallss to conss and =
plain his visws bsfcrs The members e A1'
club, be invites, slsn n antisoeiA1lGo q!
talent 10 answer him.
Ons evening last wintw was dsvots6 - ~
discuaulon Il ssctaxianiHm. The pgsul1ent ~
The club invited Catholic prissA n Ep1Docs
palian and Prssbytsrian ministr, Z U11l
Ran and, unless my memory mia,sads N II
agnostio All were listened 10 at>sat1v1ays
and each had his harvest Of appiausA
Thanks 10 the vivacity of thair mln6l -
Americans have special talent Tor 49,
the most arid subjects interesting. Al go.
debates are enlivsnsd with humouW ~
marka anecdotcA dashas oe VII snd Glpvv
rspsrtsca Needles 10 ny that thsy ars 60
ductsd with The utmost courtesy. h -
trenohant weapons employed at thsss tosqa
msnts are nrcam and banter, snd -
Americans are adsps In he M q boeh.
In America, such b ~ rsapsst IT, -
opinions Of othsra that ths wfldauA neuo lns
cougruous ideas did no1 raiss mEu
The audicncs would smile and ssem u oGnVu
"what droil dear and u ~ dFu1 ~
was expressed wittily ths oraeoe ~ eG(
piaudsd.
NV nothing more stritipg dnzing -
stay IN America, nothing which appenss1 ~
ms moro hopeful Tor ths future a oethses11I
than ~ dght oe thsss crowds q fcW e ~
hundred pscpls. msn "a anA yoenG 49,
girls and makrcua al n fashlouAh1o ogunol@
dress. usst together 10 sarn somseAlnG q
10 keep thsmaslvss posted b au ~ ~ -
of The day. ] havs hsard young lqdfb ~
papers Of their own compodt1ou . 49,
meetings, and their discoursse wgU . G1gu1|
- thoss Of their gsntlsnsn antaeanilAA
In short. what strikss ooe + ~ a -
vading activity, ths intsllsctuaI NE ~ ~
womou Of good society = we'll = mn.
Impossible that Truth shouli hids ~ 0noc
In country whsrs thcrs b such . aood 4
light
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1889-02-09

''Tucsday-Youngstown.
day-Indianapolis."
Iran TO tho Office Of this imperturbabls
Yankee and asked him;
SIS II possible that can reach these towns
30 far apart In time TO give my lecturesr
"Nothins easier" no replied, seizing the
railway guide. "Your New York lecture
comes of at o In tho afternoon AT 8, you
have train which gets to Youngstown BY
noon next day. There you lecture at q Pay
your bill and send your luggage to tho sta
ton before going TO tho opera house whore
you havo to speak. As soon as your lecture
Is over, jump into cab and you will catch
tho 10 o'clock train, which will set you down
at indianapolis in time for your next days
engagement"
"Whati go 10 tho train In evening dressr'
exclaimed.
sand why noti You undress in the sleep
Ing car, suppose"
What lifol thought these Yankees beat
everythingl
Obi that map Of tho United Statesl II
you would have an idea Of good lecturing
tour in America, just imagine yourself ap-
pearlng In public ono day in London, the
next In Paris, the day after in Berlin, then
In Vienna, St. Petersburg, and Constantine
pie, to finish up tho week. Then take Tehe-
ran, and tho chief cities OF Asia, and you
have fair idea Of the journeys
Here Is little scene Of American life. u
was told the, not only without boast, but a.
the most natural thing In tho world, by Mr.
l. s.. Metcalf, tho eti. " Of Tho Forum.
Mr.. Metcaif wished to have an article on
the subject Of the Mormons for his review,
not ono Of those papers written by a man who
had passed through the territory Of Utah,
but serious study. For several weeks be
had been In correspondence with one Of the
elders of tho Mormon church
"All this letter writing does not advance
matters much" thought Mr. Metcaf to him.
self; 'one or two hours conversation would
settle the thing"
Two hours later he was In the train for
Salt Lako City. Hs probably reckoned this
way, "It Is only Eve days Journey u tho
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1889-07-31

Mitchell is plainly ii the Capital
race and she IL there 70 stay. Funds
are secured 70 enable tho committee
e make = vigorous campaign and
Mitchells interests win b propsrly
looked alter. Among her claims 10
avor, are her unsurpassed railroad
Acilities and = location neassst tise
center q population Of ~ -
etsss. ll.2
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1889-07-31

Ayers cathartic pills ars rscoen,
msnded By the bsst physicians, -.
eause they ars fres from cajUme]
and other injurious drues. beina
compossd q purely vegetable n.
gradients. While thorough ID thsir
acljon. thsy stimulate and etssnSth,
- ne bowels and seerstosy orSsns.