davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26
How a Woman Tells a Story.
The FUNNY MAN FROM KALAMAZOO WIZ
HAD No CHANGE

The FUNNY MAN FROM KALAMAZOO Who
HAD No CHANGE.
s'Oh, Lii, / have the funniest story to
tell you; you'll just die. Mr.. Bates-you
know Mr.. Bates?-well, he is lust too cute
for anything. He called last night, and he
and pa got to telling stories. laughed till
I was just tired, and you must hear this
story"
"Do tell me, Jul; Pm dead to hear good
story"
"Wsll-Oh, it was too rich, Lii. OF course
can't tell it like Mr.. Bates-he's so awful
ly olever-but PIP
edo go on"
"Well, Mr.. Bates said-but my, you
ought to have seen his face. He can Just
draw his face down and his eyes"-
'Oh, pshaw! Jul, let's have the story"
"Well, then-now don't you make me
laugh-there was man out in Illinois-no,
now was it illinois, Why, dear me-let's
see-yes, it must have been Illinois, for
Kalamazoo is the place"-
f'Why, Jul, Kalamazoo is in Ohio,''
ooh, how stupid; of course it is. Well,
it doesn't matter anyway what state it was.
Well, this man frcm Kalamazoo-now, was
it man? Yes, it must have been a man,
for Mr.. Bates told about how he got his
cards-let's see, was it cards or poker chips?
Now that is funny can't remember. Well,
any way, this man from Kalamazoo was on
a train going to going to-Oh, dear, how
I get things mixed-to Os-Osh--Oh, YES.
Oshkosh; that's it. Well, he was going to
Oshkosh on train when another man step.
ped up and said-and said--now, what did
that man say2 Pm certain this one was a
man, and he said something to the man
from Kalamazoc-what on earth was it3''
''Never mind, Jul, go on with the story"
"Of course it really doesn't matter what
the man said; but, anyway, those two men
played and played and played. Then the
man from-now, let me be sure-yes, it
was the man on the train; he was--let me
see; didn't Mr.. Bates say he was a senator?
Yes, Pm sure he was a senator from Ohio"
"Never mind, Jul; what's that got to do
with the story?"
''Now, Lii, you put me out.''
81 don't, either; but do want to hear
the end."
'Well, the senator and the man from
played and played, till finally
now, how was that? Oh, yes; the senator
bet on the game, and the other man said
be said--oh, Scott, how provoking! Well,
anyway, the man from Kalamazoo had no
change for-yes, believe it was hundred
dollar bill, and--and"-
''Do go on, Jul.
"Why, oh, yeg-well, anyway, Lii, it is
not quite as Mr.. Bates told it. l said the
Kalamazoo man had no change, didn't I?''
"Yes, yes, and the other man?"
"Well, he-oh, Yes, now remember
well, he had. y Washington Post.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26

No. has Pullman Buffet Sleeper New York
to Cleveland, Chattanooga and points South
without change, via Harrisburg, Hagerstown
and Roam oke; also has connection at Hagers
town with fast mail from Baltimore. Also
makes close connection at Waynesboro juno
ton with G. & y. Railway west-bound trains.
No I.has through connection from Philadel-
phia via Harrisburg and G. V. Railroad, and
rom Baltimore via W. M r. r.
No. 5 has connection from Baltimore and
Washington at Shenandoah Junction via Is. &
o. r. Il. "
CONNECTIONS.
At HagerstoWn, Nd, with the Western Mary
and Railroad to and from Baltimore, Freder-
ok, Emmittsburg. Gettysburg, Penmar,
Waynesboro, Pa, and points on the Western
Maryland Railroad and branches.
With the Cumberland Valley Railroadt to and
Chambersburg, Mercersburg Martinsburg and
points on the Cumberland Valley Railroad and
branches.
Also to and from Pittsburg and the West and
Northwest. and Boston, New York, Philadel-
ohia, and the North and East.
At Shenandoah Junction, W. Va, with Main
Line of Baltimore GOhio Railroad to and from
the West.
W1ynesboro Junction with G. & o Ry East
and West bound trains.
At Loch Laird, with Lexington Branch OF
Richmond & Allegheny Railroad.
At Buchanan with Main Line of Richmond
& Allegheny Railroad.
At Roanoke, with Norfolk & Western Rail-
road
STAGE CONNECTIONS.
AT Boyce. for Wildwood and Winchester. Va.
AtTroutville for Fincastle.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26
THAT'S DIFFERENT.

asked her If she'd take stroll,
She said she didn't care,
1 asked her If she'd take my arm,
She said she didn't care.
l carelessly remarked s'hoW warm %
She said she didn't care.
Lets take the opera in" said !,
She said she didn't care.
"What seats do you prefer I'd buy ?''
She said she didn't care.
Quoth I. when going home, Ice cream p
She said she didn't care.
"Oh, do 1 wake. or do dream Z"
She said she didn't care,
"Oh, will you be my boDny bride ?r
She said she didn't care-to have
More than one husband at time.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26
Among fine Whitest THINGS on Earth

Are teeth, beautifei aud preserved by SOz
ODONT and the rose is scarce sweeter
than the breath which becomes aromatic
through its influence. Ii is the very pearl
of dentifrices and the surest preventive of
dental decay in existence. 1t remedies with
certainty canker and every species of coro-
sive blemish upon the teeth, and counter
acts the hurtful influence upon them of
acidity of the stomach. The formula of its
preparation includes only botanic ingredi-
ents and it contains only the purest and
most sslutarY of these.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26
The Secretary of Stata has

The Secretary of State has issned GER
tificate of incorporation to the Kendale
Gold Mining Company for the purpose of
miuing, milling and reducing gold, silver
and other ores, and for the purpose of pur-
chasing, leasing or owning lands in West
Virginia and North Carolina for said pur-
pose. The principal Office is to be kept in
this place. The capital stock is $500, with
the privilege of increasing it to $500, 600
and is held by Homer A. Holt, A. G. Sny-
der, A. F. Mathews, John II. Holt and s.
A. M. Syme, all we'll known citizene.-
GreenbTier W. Va.) Independent.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26
A Priga of GIO0 OO0

is good thing to get, and the man who
wins it by superior skill, or by an unexpect-
ed turn of fortunes wheel, is to be congrat-
ulated. But he who escapes from the
clutches Of that dread monster, Consump-
tion, and wins back health and happiness,
is far more fortunate. The chances of win
ming 100000 are small, but every con-
sumptive may bs absolutely sure of recov-
cry, if he takes DR.. Pierce's Golden Medi-
cal Discovery in time. For all scrofulous
diseases consumption is one of them), it is
an unfailing remedy. It is guaranteed to
cure in all cases of diseases for which it is
recommended, or money refunded.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26

PRESERVED STRAwBERRIEs.-Lady fin
ger strawberries are fine for preserving;s .
they are firm, have fine flavor and keep
their shape we'll. Try some preserved in
this way: Select large berries that are just
ripe; measure three.quarters of a pound of
sugar to each pound of fruit. Let them
cook few minutes. Take them up as dry
as possible, and spread on new tin plates,
setting them in the hottest sunshine posi-
BILE for three days. Boil the syrup until
the juice is thick, aud spread over the
berries. After three days put the preserves
in glasses, and paste them up with waxed
paper.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26
SPEAK GENTLY THE ERRING

Speak gently &. i.e err;Eg.
For. oh. thou dost not know
Upon the face appearing
TIE hearts dec, Inward woe.
Was not the sinfnl Mary
In love by Christ received,
When of her burden weary
She listened ard believed?
Crush not the dropping flower,
That bends toward the plain;
Beneath reviving sHower
1t yet may bloom again.
1t was from fires consuming
The PhoeniZ rose in light,
And breaks the mora i.iuming
The darkness OF the tight.
And thus will h2pe's bright dawning
Beam forth mid gLili and fears.
The dewdrops OF its morning
Are penitental tears
We are told In sacTet; story,
Two men went OF ce to pray
Where the shekihal glory
Shot forth its Gaming 1917.
The one with tea: drops flowing.
Bent low the suppiialit knee;
The next in pri e wns glowing.
A boastful Phif,:aee
And the Lord came down from heaven.
And heard the sinners prayer;
The proud man GnfoagiSt ca.
He left neglected thee
j ID. Blackwell.
BABY HAS GGgE as SCHOOL.
The baby has gone TO sch. o.; sh me;
What will the motl;er de-.
With never call to i,aft:iE or Pin,
Or tie little shoe?
How can she keep herself hr'y all day
With the little "hi.ii.rins iia'lg" away?
Another basket TO ii ; .V.t !i,nch,
Another "good by ~ s.y,
And the mother stsl,.f+ =, / ,oor to see.
Her baby march aa,
And turns with ~ hal q halfrelief.
And alf somethr= r,.a: ;.kin to grief.
She thinks of ps;s'-:t.'' = tar, morn.
When the childrs by .,1e
Will go from their ! :.,,.s s...t INTO the world,
To battle with lie f,,.,"
And not even the BAH i,e left cheer
The desolate home OF i:-.t future year.
She picks up garnfi Il is:: ard there.
Thrown down In ea:-,t.sS las e.
And tries to think i;.a il xe.isi seem
Ifnothing were sp!;,:.-i;
IT the hours were al,.s, still as this,
How could she bear lie ~, eli; ess
The y u.i e Of America.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26

pRooKLYN, June 16 the Rev. T. De
DWitt Talmage, L D.. preached at the
Tabernacle to d%y. A vast congrega-
tion filed the spacious b.i;dng to overflow
ing. After making az exposition of Scrip
ture, the pastor gave rns the hymn begin
ming.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26

DR.. rALMAeE's SERMON SUNDAY, JUNE II
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26

THE DYING CHRISTIAN HINDOl
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26

THERE is A WELL FOR EVER
DESERT OF BEREAVEMENT.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26
CHEsApEAKE s ONO R'Y co.

CHESAPEAKE tE OHIO R'Y co,
VestibuIe Special.
With Com posite Car, Elega MT Day Coach with
Smoking Saloon, Dining Car sud
Pullman Sleepers, betwsen
CIncIun natl, Washington,
BALTIMORE,
PHILADELPhlA.
AID NEW YORK.
WITHOUT CHANGE.
vestibulo sleeper via Huntington to and from
Louisville. attached to the Special.
SHORTEST AND QUICKEST LINE TO THE
SOUTHEAST.
Schedule in Effect MayI2. 1859.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26

SOMETHING ABOUT SYMPATHY.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26

TAR. III. M. PATTERSON offers his pro-
- fessional services to the citizens of Staun-
on. OFFICE, No. Ii East Main Street. En-
rance one door east of Gladke's store.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26

No. g. Leaves Richmond, daily, Z 35 m; ar
rives Clifton Forge, 25 m.
No. II. Portsmouth Accommodation daily
except Sunday.) Leaves South Portsmouth 00
q M, Maysvilie 90 a m; arrives Cincinnati
10 80 a m.
Through tickets and baggage checked to any
destination. Apply to any G. q o. Ticket Agt
for full Information and tickets.
J. T. HARAHAN, II. W. FULLER,
Gen. Manager. Gen'l Pass'r Agent
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26

RICH LESSONS FROM AN ORIENTAL
SCENE
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1889-06-26

SHENANDOAH VALLEY RAILROAD
- 8. r. Tyler. ReceiUer.
Time Table in effect May 18th, 1889.
The Florida agriculturist., 1889-10-23
Orange Nursery Trees.

On the kind and quality Of trees set out
depends the financial success of the or
chard
1t is my purpose to touch lightly a few
of the most important points relating to
the subject without going into details.
1t is generally supposed by those not
thoroughly conversant with the subject,
that orange trees do not vary in quality;
that the treatment of the tree in the nur-
sery does not affect the bearing capacity
of the orchard; hence the numerous fail
ures in orange culture.
When the trees are removed from the
seed beds to be transplanted to the nur-
sery a large number will be found stunted
and not possessing the necessary vitality
these trees are generally known as culls,
and are utterly worthless save to the ir-
responsible nurseryman who, by liberal
application of manure, nurses them into
budding condition. These trees are essen
TALLY natures discards, and will never
make vigorous trees.
Fertilization is one of the most impOr-
tant factors in orange culture, both in re-
gard to the nursery and the grove. 1t
not only causes a good flow of sap, thus
making budding easy, but improves the
general condition of the tree.
1t is mistake to suppose that trees
raised in highly fertilized beds will lose
their vitality if transplanted into unfer
tilted soil. On the contrary, forced trees
will owing to their superior vigor, adapt
themselves to Unchanged conditions and
grow more rapidly than those grown OH
poor soil. The reason for this marked
superiority is apparent; the forced tree
will throw out asufficient number of roots
to adapt itself to changed conditions and
continue vigorous grower, while on the
other hand, the starved tree, true to ma
ture. will continue to be a slow grower,
and in the end, will lack that vigor so de-
sirable in bearing trees.-R. S. Leroy, in
Sugar Bowl and Farm Journal.
The Florida agriculturist., 1889-10-23
Citrus Fair in New York.

The Rural Californian says: "Our en-
terprising neighbors in San Bernardina
county are agitating the feasibility of
holding a citrus fair in New York City
during the coming winter. The idea took
it's inception in the San Bernardina board
OF trade, and has been warmly endorsed
by the neighboring towns and the horti-
cuIturists generally. There is no question
of the great benefit to be derived from
such a display of our citrus fruits if well
sustained and properly conducted. 1t
would open up wide and ex tensive mar
ket for our superior oranges, lemons and
other products, and at the same time at
tract many people to our exceptionable
climate and soils rgrowing the fruits of
the semi-tropics."
Why can't our Florida growers join
with our California friends and make the
show Joint one?
The Florida agriculturist., 1889-10-23

four days more thoroughly Twins" the
stalks Lastly, they are Doxed up in large
wooden cases, the bulk of the product
being shipped east for decorative pur-
poses.
One unusual fact, uncommon as well
come, is that not single insect pest is
known to the Pampas plant
The Florida agriculturist., 1889-10-23
A Correction.

Editor Florida gricultuTiSt
In my article on waterproof cloth it
should read melted lard instead of lead.
Please have it corrected, as know of no
way to melt lead that would be satisfac-
tory on cloth. T. G..
Mariana, Jackson County, Fla.
Subscribe for the FLORIDA AGRICULT
URIsT and be happy.
The Florida agriculturist., 1889-10-23
Pampas Plumes as a CROP.

There may be many failures recorded, but
finally a success will be achieved that will
more than balance the books.
The cultivation of Pampas grass for
plumes is an industry assuming quite ex-
tensive proportions in California, and re-
turns so far show that the industry is a
profitable one.
Pampas grass grows all right in FlOri-
da, then why not make the growing OF
the plumes for market business?
Last week we published a clipping from
California paper concerning the profit
of the business. Below we give another.
What is true of California in this respect
we believe is true of Florida. The Rural
Californian says:
One product which heightened expert
ment has proved can be brought to a
high state of lucrative cultivation, right
here, on Los Angeles soil is that of Pam
pas plumes. Taking willing advantage
of an invitation, a correspondent lately
paid a visit to the grounds of Mr.. j. M.
Stewart, on Figueroa street. This gentle
man has carried on the business OfgrOw-
ing and drying this beautiful ornamental
product for the Eastern market for a
number of years past with great success.
He has at present two acres ofgrOund un-
der this crop, the returns from which, in
clean dry cash, average from $500 to
$4O0 per acre.
The feathery Pampas plume, which
seems a counterpart in the realm of bot
any to the plumage of the ostrich in the
animal kingdom, is a native of South
America. introduced in this country
some ten or fifteen years ago, systematic
careful cultivation has produced aspecies
known as the Los Angeles, which is uni
versally conceded to be the finest extant
In reality grass, it attains, when in
maturity, height of ten or twelve feet
The crop is grown in "hills the soil
banked up around the plant is termed
200 of which per acre have been found to
yield the best results. Propagation is ef-
fected not by seed. but by subdividing
and transplanting, the costper acre being
$25. Plumes may be looked for the sec
ond year after planting.
When about four or five years old the
Pampas is considered to have reached its
BEST After this the plume begins to get
shorter and gradually falls off in it's rich
and snowy appearance. When in good
bearing 10000 plumes per acre is not an
unusual yield. OF course, like every other
product, the greater care and more thor
ough cultivation bestowed the better quail
ity and more abundant are the returns
Three or four irrigations per month are
necessary during the dry season, as the
plant requires great deal of moisture.
Planting is done during the rainy period
of December and January; the harvest
taking place early in September, before
the seed begins to mature. II left toe
long the plume would shake to pieces
like thistle down.
The stalk, which bears close resem
blance to that of broom corn, is reapeC
when Just tuft of a few inches prOtrudef
from the husk The stems are cut about
an average of four feet in length. At tht
operation of harvesting, a sled is draw
along between drills upon which tht
l. n,
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1889-01-21
Gen. Mackenzie's Death.

SAD ENDING OF A BRILLIANT CAREER.
Brig. Gen. Ranald Slidell Mackenzie died
Saturday at New Brighton. Staten Island, in
the forty-ninth year of his age. He was ma
tive of New York, and graduated from the
military academy June IL, 1862, entering at
once the engineer corps in which he was a
second lieutenant. In the Petersburg cam
paign. in June. 1863, he was wounded. and was
made brevet lieutenant-colonel for meritorious
services. and in July following was promoted
to be colonel of the second Vermont heavy ar
tllery. He commanded brigade of the sixth
army corps in the Washington campaign in
several engagements, in one of which he was
again wounded. He was promoted successive
ly to brevet brigadier-general of the regular
army and to brevet major-general for gallant
and meritorious services in the field. After
the war; until December, 1888. he was on duty
In the department west of the Mississippi, en-
gagged in fighting Indians. during which time
his career was characterized as very brilliant.
In the autumn of 1877 he received serious
injury, near Fort Sill, by being thrown violent
ly from a wagon and striking his head upon a
hard gravel road. After that his mind occa-
slonally seemed TO be deranged. and the fear
that his injury had affected his brain developed
into certainty in the latter part of 1888. when
board of army surgeons pronounced him in
sane. and he was retired and brought east to
an insane asylum.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1889-01-21
AMATEUR PHOTOGRAPHIC
What the Washington Camera Club is
Doing.

The Washington Camera club, for young
organization, is obtaining remarkable recogni-
ton from photographers of both this country
and Europe. At nearly every meeting letters
are read from similar organizations in other
cities, and a correspondence has begun with the
Scientific Photographic society, of Paris The
club rooms in the Capital building, 1420 Penn
sylvania avenue, have been very neatly fur
nished with modern convenences for the pro-
duction of photographs, and many an interest
ing meeting is held at which members tell each
other about their trials and their successes
with the lenses. The club is now bestirring
itself in preparation of grand event to take
place in the early spring, an exhibition of pho
tographs taken, developed and printed by the
members. Judging from the exhibit which the
club sent to Cincinnati. this collect ton of
amateur pictures will be an interesting and
beautiful one. At recent meeting of the
club officers for the year 1889 were elected as
follows: President Robt. j. Fisher; secretary
and treasurer, DIR. S. H. Griffith. L. s. NJ: cor
responding secretary, ]. Albert Cole; trustees.
Philip L. Dodge F. A. Schneider and D. E. Nc
Comb
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1889-01-21
DISTRICT GOVERNMENT.
CHANGES IN rErNpRrH.


The Commissioners have written to Surveyor
Forsyth IN regard to the subdivision recently
filed and known as Petworth. directing that
I'd street be changed to Sd. Sd 20 ith. 9Th 10
9TH, 5sh to 18th, 9th TO sth, 9TH to
9Th streets, as these changes bring these
streets in harmony with the city. They also
change the name of sheridan circle 10 Grant
circle In a letter sent with the above the
Commissioners indicate q number Of spaces as
public reservations.
MISCELLANEOUS.
The letter of DIR. Chas II. Bowen suggesting
the transformation of Mount Vernon square
into circle, on the grounds that at present it
is great obstruction to travel, has been re-
ferred to Col. Jno. NJ. Wilson by the Commits
sioners.
Joseph Mehler. the new proprietor of the
Solari hotel. l409 Pennsylvania avenue, has
been granted a liquor license.
Louis II. Wayman and Jas. Duffy have been
appointed additional privates on the police
force.
The Commissioners have informed Mr.. II. C.
Stier that the Christian church, on Vermont
avenue, has been recorded as exempt from the
tax for paving the alley between n and .
streets
The Commissioners have informed Mr.. A.
Lisner. of 1l17 and ll19 Pennsylvania avenue,
relative TO his claim for damages for injury TO
horse from sinking into defective carringe-way
on V street between 9th and 10th streets, that
they are of the opinion that the District was
not liable for the injury.
Mr.. Joseph ]. Waters, of SO77 NJ street north
west. has petitioned the Commissioners to re-
move VIM. Cunningham, private on the Me-
tropolitan police force. The matter has been
referred to Major Moore
Some time ago Mrs. Mary G. Wilkinson sug-
gested that the Commissioners recommend ac-
ton by the appropriation committee in behalf
of the Young Women's Christian home. The
Commissioners have replied that it is their
present in
when asked for by the congressional COM
mittee having charge of the matter
James Oliver has been appointed keeper Of
the morgue.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1889-01-21
Cruelty to the Aleuts.

GOVERNOR swINEFoRD REITEgATEs HIS CHARGES
AGAINST THE ALASKA COMMERCIAL COMPANY
The annual report of Gov. Swineford upon
the operations of the Alaska Commercial COM
pany was laid before both houses of Congress
Saturday. The governor reafirms and empha-
sizes the accusations heretofore made by him
against the company in its dealings with the
natives other than those living on the seal
islands The company's treatment of the
mainland natives he characteriZes as unjust
and cruel in the extreme. Referring to the
denial of the charges against the company in
his last annual report. he says:
Il now and here reiterate every one of those
charges. though / know full well that an inves-
CATION made by committee of Congress hold
ing its sessions in Washington, and calling as
witnesses only those vino have been recipients
of the company's favors is not likely to arrive
ut any just conclusion as to their truth or
falsity. l can only say that each and every
statement have made concerning the opera
tons. of the company is susceptible of the
clearest and most convincing proof, but the
evidence will not be found lying around loose
in the cities of Washington and San Francisco;
it must be sought for among the people who
have suffered from its expressions rather than
in the persons of those who have had free
transportation on its ships and wined and
dined at the tables of its officers and agents."