Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1889-03-27
MY WIFE'S LEGACY.
How She Counted Chickens That
Never Hatched.

Never Hatched.
II don't like to calculate upon such
things" observed my wife; "but if Aunt
Jane were to die, should not be bit sur
prised if she left US that old fashioned set
Of silver. that belonged to my great-grand-
parents"
Out of consideration for the printer, 1
will omit indications of the emphasis with
which she usually spoke. If the reader
will kindly consider every second word
printed in small caps or italics, he will have
some faint idea of her manner of express
ing herself.
eft is a very handsome SET" returned,
glancing about our modest dinlng-room;
land will hardly accord with our furni-
ture"
"It wouldn't look at all well with that
side board" returned my wife, promptly,
it is so dreadfully shabby-oh, of course,
1 mean the side-board, not the silver;
don't be so SMART
Il suppose then, if such thing were
to happen, you d have to have new side.
board"
She nodded complacently.
~ saw such lovely one downtown to-
day-antique oak, beautifully carved. 1 do
admire oak SO much"
But the rest of the furniture is wal
nut" 1 objected.
'SWalnut is altogether out of style, espec-
ially for dining rooms she replied with d
disdainfuI glance at the chairs which we
had once found very good to look at; "and,
after all, the sideboard is by so much the
most expensive piece of furniture in din
ing-room, that it doesn't cost much more to
get a whole set than just that one piece.
And even a walnut sideboard, new, would
not look well with these chairs and this
table"
i said nothing, and the tacit surrender
was accepted by my wife. Thenceforth it
was understood that if Aunt Jane should
bequeath US that silver, we were to pur.
chase new set of dining-room furniture.
The next evening, as we were again at
dinner, my wife remarked:
have been looking at carpets to-day,
and saw one that just suits me-rich and
subdued, you know, but not dingy,n
" "Carpetsp' repeated, in some surprise:
'' didn't know that there was one needed
this season"
"Why, stupid" rejoined my wife, petu-
lantly (and the emphasis was all upon the
pet Dame), "did we not agree that the din
lng-room must be refurnished And this
carpet IS so old and worn, of course itwould
not do at ell with new furniture"
Again acquiesced silently, and she pro-
ceeded TO make plans for meeting me the
next day to examine and choose the carpet
and furniture to be purchased later on
Well, If MY wife's relations left her hand
some silver, / must of course provide things
in keeping with it.
She met me according to appointment,
and having inspected the articles, gave me
to understand that my taste was so execra-
BILE as not to merit moment considera-
ton, and announcing her own choice, sug-
gested, coolly;
"And now let's go look at the wall paper"
Wall-paper2' l echoed, blankly
"Of course, the room must be re-papered
fit is re-furnished. AS for the woodwork,
suppose there is no help for that-it will just
have TO be regrained. Can they make that
natural wood finish on wood that has been
painted!"
1 stared aghast; that silver was going to
cost me pretty sum. But was helpless
entirely so; my wife had made up her mind
That evening, she was much elated at the
prospect OF being surrounded by such
things as she had that day selected. There
was but one cloud on her horizon.
THE dining-room will be nicer than the
parlors," she remarked, plaintvely; 81
am afraid that they will really look
shabby"
1 said nothing, hoping that if she were
not contradicted she would not pursue the
subject farther.
Vain hopel She had it fixed in her mind
that silence gave consent, and when came
home the next evening, had assumed that
the parlors were TO be newly fitted up.
Don't you Think she said, coaxingly,
"that as long as the parlors and dining
rooms are TO be torn up, and we are to have
the painters and paper-hangers here, we
might as well have the whole house donel
1t would be very little more trouble, and
then IL would all look nice together
ut would be considerably more expen-
sive," demonstrated, family.
You might draw the money out of the
building association" she suggested, and
then l knew that our savings in that insti-
tuition were doomed.
Aunt Jane fingered long time In JUS
tice TO my wife, must admit that she had
become oblivious of the fact that all these
improvements depended upon a legacy,
which could only be possessed after the
death OF her venerable relative
E A day or SO after she had decided that
the house was to be thoroughly renovated
my wife said to me:
81 have been examining the parlor car
pets, and find that by using the best parts
of both, and buying a wide border, l can
get quite new carpet Tor our bedroom
absolutely unworn-"
'1ndeedl'' remarked, with pleased sur
prise; there was one thing that she would
not want, any how.
.'Yes, and the carpet that is now on it has
enough good TO cover the children's room
If put the worn part under the bed. Or
maybe I'd better put that on the spare
room," she added, refectively, land give
that one to the children. Theirs gets such
hard wear that an old one will not last any
time, hardly"
said nothing, but felt greatly relieved
"As long as we don't have TO buy a bed
room carpet" she remarked, insinuatingly,
''don't you think we could afford new set
of furniturel''
mo, don't" / returned, savagely;
whereupon she burst into tears and called
me heartless monster. To pacify her
had to promise the furniture, together with
new silk and a sealskin, that the mistress
OF the house might be as fine as her dwell
ing.
ut does seem a shame ,, she said, few
days afterward, ssto spend so much money
on this house. That's very handsome and
expensive paper that we looked at, and to
substitute an archway for the folding doors
win cost somethin g this was the first
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