The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1889-04-27

soarandf,op .(erandiloquently) -
eyes; it pays to do right. hones sy
the best policy after all. ranA
..Why don't you have it rene~eu'
Time. :, NJ
az am opposed to all games ..
.h.nce said Rawson. "And yet you
pot married?" said Lawson. los
and that's why / am so strongly "
posed to 'em. brakes Magazine
The Kansas Legislature CONTAINS
ten newspaper men, who at once e'.
vate its standard Of intelligence 90.
reduce its average percentage "
wealth.-Kansas City Star.
-.I know my defects, SAID D-jen-
kins pompously; and as the bystanders
Hooked at him admiringly, one OF them
wbispered to another softly; wna'
az awful lot that man must know.
Somerville Journal. .r,a
Mr.. Garrrlous-sWhy do peopio
think the Sphinx typical OF wisdom
(,eoroepu Georges (whc Isl still suilet-
ing from the effects of curtain Lecturer
az guess it is because the opn,hA
always keeps it's mouth sn''. na
per's Bazaar. aw
-She-.I must show you my new
clock before you CO." He (fa:et' ousiy)
Some of my friends tell me s na'
bomely enough to stop a. clock. {" ono
%, that won't matter! 1t can 70
started again. Life.
Cant you spare me little money"
papap" oIiow much, dear?' well
want to buy enough material to make
one of the new-fashioned bathing
suits. Gan right, my dear. Get what
you want. Here is half a dollar.
Richfield News.
what shall we do n the price OF
-four goes up any furtherP" exclaimed
Mrs. Kneadem to her husband. II can
suggest simple remedy my dear, re-
sponded Mr.. Kneadem. quietly. e'ust
continue your home baking and we
need not anticipate any rise in bread.
Montreal Star. -
Young author-'.Doctor, II l can 7.
ret some relief from writer's cramp l.
I shall have to give up my literary
work. / have come to you for advice.
Doctor (who has read some oil his
literary work)-"My young friend.
quit writing entirely. and reilei nos
only instantaneous but widespread
will follow. Chicago Tribune. =
-"You used to think a little more
of me and not quite so much of your
self in the days when you were courting
me-" exclaimed Mrs. Brown, tearfully.,
during the course of little conjugal
conflict. you never said a truer thing
than that" replied the brute '1forgot
myself entirely at that time or ! never
would have proposed. "-Terre Haute
Express.
Editor great magazine-"Here is
fine article on Modern Art. but it is
written by some unknown jay who lives
In Pumpkinville. Assistant-"Alr
right; I'll go out and find some great
artist willing to put his name to it.
Guess one will do it for 800" Very
we'll; I'll send the jay fifty cents and
tell him to keep quiet, and that maybe
we'll take another article from him
some day and let him use his own
name. "-Philadelphia Record.
-Blobson-"Ha, ha! Here's an ar
ticle which says that before the close of
the nineteenth century we shall sees
women running locomotive engines ON
our railroads" Mrs. Blobson-''Well,
why not? Don't you think they would
make good onesp" Mr.. Blobson-''In
some respects, perhaps. They would
keep good lookout ahead, anyway"
Mrs. Blobson-''Why sop Mr.. Blob
son-''Because they would have their
heads out of the cab window all the
time to show their new bonnets ~
Burlington Free Press.