davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31
Women Are Not Humorists.

Women as rule are not fond of jokes; they
listen To clever stories with simulated anrlse-
ment and forget them Immediately. The
reason for this lies in one of the essentials in
the make up of woman-her profound and
tender sympathy. Humor deals with the
weakness of humanity; it exposes foibles and
puncturts tender skin. Humor sets the world
laughing at some blunder of man. It is
woman nature to cover up, excuse and re-
form lollies are too serious in her eyes to
laugh a. If women were humorists they
would not be the most earnest church work
crs, the most tender of nurses, and the most
sentimental and refined portion of humanity
Tho same inherent quality which would
make a true woman a real woman, shrink
as Judge from pronOuncing Il death sentence,
or as soldier from shooting an enemy through
the hear. makes it impossible for her to be
come a lun"rist. Wit a woman NAV have,
wit she GOES possess, and is a formidable ad-
versary "ith her stiletto points of irony and
satire. But humorous in the common ac-
ceptatlon of the term, in the careless, roll
licking, singing art of current quips and
JestS-nC Vcr.-N aShinCton Post
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31
The Spanish Queens Wig,

The august regent of Spain resorts to the
Wig maker for the preservation of her locks
She has a head of hair which is fine and
silky, but rather thin. and as she feared that
not irons would make IL prematureIy gray
she inau.snratcd Il practice now very common
among Continental women. When her maid
has accu INFLATED @ondly supply OF her mis-
tess' combings she hands them over to a
capillary artist, who has them sorted hair by
hair, the roots being always placed together
\. NJ. Albert, whllom coilfeur to Ia grand
duchess, Is famous for this Kind of work He
weaves all the hair, into "A scalp, and, to give
a permanent curly and wavy set, has the hair
put Iii the curling and waving irons and
placed for week in "A steam heated oven
The heat of fire would not do 80 well and
would darken the hue of fair or of gray or
red han. His object Is to make the scalp
match Exactly with the live hair in texture
and color Before the steam oven device was
hit upon most of the hair used for artificial
Scalps WAS taken from the heads of infants,
because hat taken from adult heads would
not curl and wave SO well Chicago News
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31

The crops of Prince Edward ISLAM
promise to be the best ever known.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31
THE VERDICT UNANIMOUS.

W. d. Suit, druggist, Bippus. Ind -
testities: Il can recommend Electric
Bitters as the very best remedy. Every
bottle sold has given relief in every case
One man took six bottles. and was cured
of rheumatism of ten years standing. ;
Abraham Hare, druggist. Bellville, OHIO
affrms; THE best selling medicine
have ever handled in my twenty years
experience. Is Electric Bitters." Thous.
ands of others have added their testimo-
ny, so that the verdict is unanimous thai
Electric Bitters do cure all diseases OF
the liver. kidneys or blood, Only hall
a dollar bottle at Hartz & Bahnsen's
drug store:
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31
LOCAL NOTICES.

The Crown dining hall, No. 170S Sec
ond avenue, is now ready Ia furnish you
the best meal in the city for % cents
A. D Huesing, real estate and insur-
ance agent. Office No. 1908 Second ave>
nue., Rock Island.
Try the new Excelsior Bread made
only at the Vienna Steam Bakery, Dav~
export For safe at Weverhauser &
Denkman's mill store. II. K0rn.
Paid up stock in the Rock Island
Building association can now be had. A
chance to obtain six per cent on large
amounts on call. +. II. GUYER, Secy
The Royal Insurance company. Of Eng
land, has the largest surplus of anv fire
insurance company in the world. A D.
Huesing, agent. office No. 1908 Second
avenue. KoCk Island
Insure in the BOvlston Insurance Co,
of Boston, Mass. organized 1872 As
sets nearly $1,000 E. W. Hurst,
agent. Office over Rock Island National
bank
Modern Houses For Sale
On monthly installments by Guyer &
Sweeney.
Barth & Babcock, Dentists.
No, 1924 Second avenue. Special atten
ton paid to saving the natural teeth and
inserting teeth without plates,
For Sale.
Fourteen dry lots on four years time,
with six per cent per annum, to any one
wishing to build this summer.
B. DAVENPORT.
To the Watch Tower.
Cars run to Black Hawks Watch
Tower every thirty minutes on Sunday
afternoons and holidays, and SPECIAL
trains to accommodate picnic parties
Telephone to the street car barn to COM
plete arrangements for special trains.
Surety on Bonds.
Those who are required to give bonds
in positions of trust and who desire to
avoid asking friends to become their
sureties, or who may wish to relieve
friends from further obligations as bonds
man, should apply to the agent of the
American Surety Co. of New York
ED. LIEBERKNECHT,
General Insurance Agent.
Rock Island, Ill.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31
Woman's Discovery.

Another wonderful discovery has
been made, and that, too, by a lady in
this country. Disease fastened its
clutches upon her and for seven years she
withstood its severests tests, but her vital
organs were undermined and death
seemed imminent. For three months she
coughed necessarily and could not sleep.
She bought of us bottle of DR.. Kings
New Discovery for consumption and was
so much relieved on taking the first dose
that she slept all night, and with one
bottle has been miraculously cured. Her
name is Mrs. Luther Lutz." Thus write
W. c. Hamrick s. Co.. of Shelby. N. c.
Get free bottle at Hartz & Bahnsen's 8
drug store.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31
THE TRAVELLERS GUIDE.

THICAGo, ROCK ISLAND s. PACIFIC RAIL
- way-Depot corner Fifth avenue and Thirty
first street, J. F. Cook, agent
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31
ADVICE To nuJHkRH.

Are you disturbed at night and broken
OF your rest by a sick child suffering and
crying with pain of cutting teethf II so,
send at once and get bottle OF Mrs.
Winslow's Soothing Syrup for children
teethinS. Its value is incalculable.
1t will relieve the poor little sufferer inn
mediately. Depend upon it mothers.
there is no mistake about it. 1t cures
dysentery, diarrhoea, regulates the stom-
ach and bowels, cures wind collie, soft
ems the gums, reduces Inflammation. and
gives tone and energy to the whole sys-
TEN. Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup
for Children Teething is pleasant to the
taste, and is the prescription n of one Of
the oldest and best female nurses and ply.
sicians Ii the United States, and is foI
sale by all druggists throughout the
world. Price % cents per bottle.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31

The best on earth can truly be said of
Grigg's Glycerine Salve, which is a sure,
safe and speedy cure for cuts. bruises,
scalds, burns wounds and all other sores;
Will positively cure piles, letter and all
skin eruption. Try this wonder healer.
Satisfsc ton guaranteed or money refund
ed. Only 25 cents. Sold by druggists
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31

GOING WEST.

Passenger trains arrive aud depart from Uuion
depot Peoria.
Accommodation train leaves Rock Island As
p. m, arrives at Peoria = 80 4. IN Leaves Peoria
Is p. m. arrives al Rock Island 05 a M.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31

In the pursuit of the gooa things of
his world we anticipate too much; we
eat out the heart and sweetness of world
ly pleas Tres by delightful forethought of
them. The results obtained from the use
of DR.. Jones Red Glover Tonic far exceed
all claims. 1t cures dyspepsia, and all
stomach, liver, kidney and bladder
troubles. 1t is perfect tonic, appetizer,
blood purifier, a sure cure for sgue and
malaria diseases. Price, so cents, of
druggists.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31
RuCKLEN's ARNICA sALYE-

The best sslve in the world for cats,
bruises, sores, ulcers, salt rheum, fever
sores, letter, chapped hands, chilblains.
corns and all skin eruptions. and posi-
lively cures piles, or no pay required. 1t
is guaranteed to give perfect satisfaction
or money refunded. Price 25 cents per
box. For sale bv Hsrtz & Bahnsen.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31

Accom-. AC ON. Accom- Accom-
400 pm 9l0 an " r. Isl'd ar sos am $40 pm
90 pm 10. 70 am ar Rey'lds lv :. 10 am 145 pm
35 pm,2 90 am ar Gable Nv. $50 am 12 so pm
Chair car on Fast Express between Rock Island
and Peoria in both directions
H. B SUDLOW, X. STOCKHOUSE
Superintendent. Gen1 Tkt. Agent.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31
VlPor and VitaIIIy

Are gu ckly given to every part of the
body by Hoods Sarsaparilla. That tired
feeling IS entirely overcome. The blood
is purii enriched. and vitalized, and
carries health instead of disease to every
organ. The stomach is toned and
strengthened. the appetite restored The
kidneys and liver are reused and invig-
GRATED. The brain is refreshed, the mind
made clear and ready for work. Try it.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31

FAST N Ill TRAIN with vestibuled trains be-
tween Chicago, Milwaukee, ST. Paul and Minne-
apolis.
TRANS-C0NTINV NTAL ROUTE between Chi
caso, Council Bluffs, Omaha and the Pacific
Coast.
GREAT NATIONAL ROUTE between Chicago
Kansas City and 81. Joseph, No.
EsT0 MILES OF ROAD reaching ali principal
points In Illinois, Wisconsin, Minnesota, Iowsa
Missouri and Dakota.
For msps. time tables, rates OF passage and
feight etc, apply TO the nearest station agent
OF the Chicago Milwaukee s 81. Paul Railway or
TO any railroad agent any where In the world.
ROSWELL MILLER A. V. H. CARPENTER.
General Manager. Genl Pass & T. Agt
~For information in reference TO Lands and
Towns owned ey by the Chicago Milwaukee d
IT. Paul Railway Company, write to Il. q. Hau-
gen. Land Commissioner Milwaukee. Wisconsin
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31

Sylvanus Jones, of Richmond. Va,
is reported to have written 36. 764 words
in shorthand on a postal card.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-31

The delicious fragrance, refreshing
GOODNESS and soft beauty impaired to the
skin by Pozzoni's Powder, commends it
to all ladies.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1889-11-07

competent man could be effected in stop
ping payment Of from ten TO fifty dollars
10 each Of the different supervisors
for work more than il required to pay
their personal road tax. believe that
80 per cent Of the present tax under proper
management could be made todouble the
amount Of work now done and Of per
manent nature. l believe that good
wagon roads are Of more intrinsic value
10 the farmers Of America than are the
railroads. believe that the merchants
Of this county and Of the entire territory
would advance their interests more BY the
upbuilding Of q good road system, con-
Quoted on business principles, than by
securing additional railroad facilities.
People will come to country that has
good wagon roads and viii stay there, too.
An intelligent farmer recently said he
would rather give 800 per acre for land
in community having good roads than
40 per acre for as good land in . district
having poor or Indifferent roads. Theeast
is arousing In regard to the matter Of roads;
new laws are being enacted and intelli-
gent road systems adopted. Stone break
ing machines are In many districts and
macadamiSing d becoming the order Of
the day. Let us keep abreast and mot
behind the times. A. 7. P.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1889-11-07
HOW ABOUT YAKIMA?
Listen to the Story as it is Told by Careful
Observers from Abroad.

(SaR FFancicO EzaminerJ
The new State Capital will probably be
CSpOluns Rsviv)
The best and most extensive agricultural District
and IN TIE Territory lies about the City Of North Yakima
tSsaalk POstInishgencer) as sf
To-day where ur unculvate pae
now stands the City Of North Yakima the Queen Of Eastern Wangon
(NOrhweM NaOarne.)
sn q valleys which meet h new town North Yakima
ton has settled this place the Capital the
tPOaand 0rsOOaiaa)
There no Just Why this county reached
and the good reason WRy thew SH
not b eventually among ne wsahet and washington
territorial adde There county taxation hedd
the world . he lowest known including Minnesota % and including
he UuSc rd ls %@y new country that can show as low
The valley In which the city Of North IN the center Of
series q very fertile valley. which into and the
p.oduca With splendid agricultural surrounding and he pecui
q r. location for railroad
10 the future brilliantly go
(SpOkane Rspew)
Although len than forty miles difference between Yakima
Yakima county and nensburh Kthas county
between northern and southern Latitude The valley surrounding Ensburr
dsyng more saenton . fruits vegetables similar crops
which can only b crown In . warm climate. - Eo'
InTvW Wak Judge from aasndins he Mechanic, E On
California, Pubtihed In he Seattle P0tInklIqsneer
exhibition
specimens Of vegetables and many varieties fruit Washington Territory
California The Yakima p:acbss e az nae Pro
quality and nayor than raised IL California
Vegetables he Yakima cpuny y n ase ner
California n ' ~ NY pOouceo !"
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1889-11-07
TO THE 4NossBAcKs."


This is the age and era Of improvement
and progress. Science has advanced with
such strides the past few years as to ex-
cite the amazement and wonder Of al.
Steam and electricity are working in
harness and performing daily duties
which would have been accounted mir
aclcs few short years ago.
Living in this favored age, enjoying the
wonders and ccnveniences that study and
invention have afforded them, should
any supinely fold their hands and attempt
TO live without heartily engaging In the
race toward Improvement?
The fnrmer has that within his reach
wh.eh Il susceptible Of more noticeable
and attractive improvement thu 'ither
ne scientist Or the inventor. Natures
virgin soil is under his feet, which, BY
little sxsrtion on his part, can be made .
blooming bower. . forest Of fruit, mod
srn Garden Of Eden. Especially b this
applicable 10 the farmers Of Yakima
county. The soil Of our valleys and
table-lands possesS the peculiar virtues
that insure beautiful homes 10 the men
Of energy. Some Of our worthy fhrmers
have realised the fact and are improving
and Identifying their homes and grounds.
Othen have not, but appear coutentsd 10
walk In the same trail, Whose beaten
path shows the footprints Of . lifetime.
The same old ruts have 70 b avoided,
and the same holeS gap In the fences.
The sagsbruSh has not yet given place 10
the garden and the orchard. The houss
and fence are innocent Of paint or white
wash, and the old harm wagon jostles
along, year after year, over the same
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1889-11-07

satisned with the prospect. They have
already gone east for machinery and
skilled labor, and viii commence the
erection Of reduction works and ioundrles
at an early date; and within Q few months
there win be permanently located at
North Yakima one Of the largest iron
works on the coast.
We have long known Of the many and
favorable openings for this kind Of bust
ness offered by North Yakima. Our only
surprise has been that far-seeing capital
lists have not taken hold Of this matter
before. As Il Is now, however, an as
sured fact, we can congratulate ourselves
that the hundreds Of laborers and me-
chanics thus introduced into North Yak
ina viii 10 Q great aid in helping our
thriving city along on its certain road to
prosperity and fame.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1889-11-07
LABOR MoEEMENTS.

No thinking man win regard the labor
movements in this country or Europe
with alarm or distrust. They are the
necessary outcome Of the disruption Of
the feudal system. Social reform cannot
stop half way between serfdom and
complete freedom. Eeridom Is indeiensi-
BILE. Il follows then that the laborer 10
entitled 10 a. much Of the wealth Of the
world a. he has power to secure. None
but the lazy, non-producen need dread
the issue. The comforts and Injuries Of
the earth are Ear more generally distrib-
uted than they were q hundred years ago.
The spread Of education among all classes
L At the root Of the matter. So long as
working" people were ignorant It was
easy 10 compel them 70 be satis6ed with
the modicum Of wealth which was &C.
corded them. knowledge d power"
The masses are still sadly ignorant, but
they are learning that they are the props
Of society. They are also learning that
the present usaees which force them To-
perform the labor, also secures the princi-
pal advantages to others. It b becoming
apparent to them that, although there
are no written laws on the subject,
caste" Is almost a. rigid Q matter In
some sections a. In Hindoostan. That
certain classes Of men are doomed 10
work, that others may be permitted 10
play. Our fathers successfully main
tanned q revolution 10 secure political
equality. Their sons are called upon 10
support . movement to secure social
equality. Workingmen are now seeking
TO attain this end, not In this country
alone, but throughout the world. Before
long they win display . power, In the
ince Of which monarchies, arisiocracies
and plutOcracies must vanish and fade
away. That there will be much trouble,
turmoil and confusion, ere labor secures
the position Il Is entitled 10 occupy b
probable. The revolution Il too vast, TOO
much Of an up-Footing Of old ideas 10 Be
accomplished in peace. But Il will be
done. In view Of these facts, and they
are truisms, it viii be well 10 recognize
the claims labor IL justified In preierring,
and avoid any unseemly or Idle attempts
TO resist them. In different forms and
shapes these ideas win come up before
our legislature, about to convene. We
4. - -.sul a \ "A
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1889-11-07

NORM AND sOUTH DAKOTA have been
admitted BY presidential proclamation 10
statehood, but Washington still remains
out In the cold, owing 10 the blunder Of
Governor Moore In not signing the Ger
tiled copy Of the new state constitution.
The overnight has been corrected but Il
may b some days before We are officially
admitted, the president. however, has
intimated that the Legislature might con-
vsne and proceed 10 slsct senators, giving
South Dakota % precedent.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1889-11-07

- tnefe any othef portion OF the civil.
lied world that is cursed with q poor
roads and a. poor an excuse for road
system q the United States? II there d,
the writer has not heard oft.
Our farmers, and they are the ones
most interested. scramble to town a. best
they may, over Indifferent roads, muddy
In wet weather and cut up and deep with
dust In dry. They will toll over rocky or
sandy roads year after year, making but
feeble or Indifferent attempts 10 better
them. In no other civilized country
would this be endured. In any Of
the European countries the country
roads are almost % good a. city
pavements. There one may travel, ct
any season, over roads that can be de-
pended upon, that will not compel the
traveller TO Wallow through mud in wet
weather nor be choked with dust In dry
times. Our pour roads are largely the
fault Of our road system. District super
visors are elected Or appointed, o. the
ease may be. Often they are Ignorant Of
the first principles Of road building. or
are TOO lazy or TOO busy 10 properly attend
10 the work. With each new year, gem
orally, comes . new supervisor, and each
supervisor has his own idea Of good roads
and he ct once proceeds 10 tear up his
predecessors work and nx the road
- be thinks b should be. OF course
this d not always the case, but Il ID
% TOO often. This Il all wrong. Again
our road laws compel each male citizen
over the ags Of q and under 30 10 per
form . certain amount Of road work. In
Washington Il b two days work or n In
coin, and IN additional tax Of y for each
1900 worth Of property. Road work b o
thing that Il b considered proper 10 ahirk.
Men who will do good work anywhere
else consider that they can shirk here.
Every possible device b used 10 kill time.
Men who ought 10 Be interested forget
that Il b their own interests they are
sighting. Good, well kept roads mean
prosperity, long life 10 wagons andteams,
reduction Of your own nervous wear and
tear, Q reduction Of the expence Of haul.
ing produce 10 market and thousand
blessings beside. A noted railroad uresi.
dent has aptIy said that zone dollar put
On the roadbed d worth two dollar n.
vested IN rolling stock" Again, in Ger
tain eastern community ne merchant.
made . united effort 70 improve the roads
leading 10 their town. and vim mch
marked succe.a that nav cap.urad m
entire trade Of he gurToundInr county.
Farmeru came 70 theiY town N praieranc.
% others nearer aimplv beeau.a an ~
roads leading into thst town ve,e eood.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1889-11-07

81. LOUIS sends vOluminous documents
endeavoFing 10 convince the HERALD that
that q d the place for the Worlds Fair.
The most overwhelming reason why Il
isn't that presents itself 70 our mind 10
that Il ID too far from Chicago.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1889-11-07

AWATEnLoO has oveFtaken the republi-
cans In the eask The Ohio legislature Is
democratic and Foraker for governor Il
beaten By twelve thousand plurality.
The republican candidate for governor Is
beaten In lowe, Malone b laid out cold
In West Virginia and the republican
loses In New York and Massachusetts,
are heavy. Presidsnt Harrison thinks
the result has no Significance.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1889-11-07

Our : Insurance Business
Is continually increasing We say without Of contradiction
that represent the best line of companies in the City
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1889-02-27
The Explosion at Wilkesbarre.

WnKEsBARRE, Pa, Feb. 26.-AIl the
bodies of the victims at the sqqib factory,
identified, except one, girl of fourteen or
sixteen years. 1t is said that she was a
stranger, and came to the factory for work.
No one in Plymouth is missing. The
coroner's jury met to-day and proceeded to
the residence of foreman Reese, who was
so badly injured that his life is despaired
of. In his statement Reese said: During
the forenoon the proprietor of the factory
came in and told the girls that. as they
were not busy. they should sort a lot of
loose squibs that were lying on the floor,
some of which were loaded and others
empty. The girls began to sort the squibs,
and Miss Kate Jones picked out what she
considered the poor ones of those that were
empty, aud threw them into the stove.
One of them happened to be loaded, and it
exploded, the spark lgniting lot of loaded
squibs lying near. The explosion followed,
and the first thing / knew / was lying in a
field outside" Reese was the only witness
examined to-day. Another pertinent fact
was the presence in the building of two
more kegs of power than the borough
ordinance allows