The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-12-25
BRIGHT BITS.


THE MAN who is "alone with his thoughts
often is surrounded by the deepest solitude
Rome Sentinel
EDTroR-Our next issue is the day after
Christmas. Have you thought up a feature
YETI
Sub-Yes; 1 have two columns of cures for
indigestion,-N YORK Herald
RosEBUsH-Did you hear what the gardener
said about your
Geranium-No.
Rosebush-He said he was going to put you
through course of sprouts.-F1tck.
Mrs LITERARY-Do you believe with the poet
that reading makes full man?
Mrs. Practical (sighmg)-I don't know that
reading makes full man. but l am convinced
That club reading room doss.-TerGS lStftiH0s.
Mas SLATTERLY to her servant)-Come right
IN here, Mary, and eat your supper with the
family.
Mary-No, thanbee, mum; 1 only came here
TO earn my wages-not to be looked down on
Puck
A MAN aroused his wife from a sound sleep,
the other night, saying that ne had seen ghost
in the shape of a donkey.
20 let me sleep the irate dame rejoned
and don't be frightened at your own shadow. -
Texas StftingS.
TAroR-MADE PUN.-Gaggs-Yo can't tell
me the difference between my tailor and your
lawyer.
Wages Nonsense The former tries TO
his suits.-Jldge
FIRST PULLMAN PoRTER-Whad's yo' ser ner-
vous bout, Johns'n?'
Second Porter-I'se a quartah out. OATS
what S nervous bout. Done BACKED pah OBJ
my own boots by mistake fer dat nabob's in d.
10 tn suction.-ErchdnQe
ALREADY HERE.-Chicagoan Visiting friend
in New YorI)-Seems to me, old fellow. that
you have an uncOmmonly large number of
pretty girls in New York.
Gothamitc Why Certainly; New York already
has the worlds far.-Tinle
EFFECT OF PoLITIcs.-"Ny dearest Laura,
what is the matter Here you are bathed In
tears and only four weeks after your wedding. -
90, Clara, my husband is candidate for mayor,
and have just found out by this mornings
paper that he Is a paragon of all the vices. -
Fiiegende BIatter
WoULDS'r LET HIM START IN.-Jones7I sup
pose you take lots OF comfort with your new
baby, Brown?
Brown-Well, should say so. Let me tell
you how cunning he is
JoneS-Id very much like to hear: but to tell
the truth, Pm due on the next block four hours
from now. Some other time, Brown.-JlCdoe.
In A CERTAIN FAMILY, as the Christmas season
came around, it was resolved to try an expert
ment. Every member of the family wrote out
a list of the Christmas presents that he or she
would like to get, and hung it up on the chin
ney piece, for the guidance of those who were
going to make gifts. 1t was rather convenient
anu nIce all AROUND but young man or the
family conceived the idea OF throwing a little
humor into the list of things that he wanted.
and among the other articles that he put down
as desirable Christmas presents for himself he
included 1.-THE Tail of Roberto" Now. Ro.
berto was the name of cat that lived in the
house; and the young man could not possibly
have his cats tail for present. because it was
bobtailed. II was a fairly good joke but IL
happened that member of the family who
wasn't very good at photography took this en-
try for the name of a book, and having a par
through the bookstores in search of it, Have
you the Tale of Roberto?'" she asked at a very
large and entirely hrstc store The book
seller scratched his head for a moment. and
made answer: mo; we haven't it in stock lust
now, but we can send and get it for you "-Bos-
ton Transcript