New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1889-11-17
THE INSTITUTE FAIR.
QUEER THINGS TO BE SEEN THERE.


There are stu a few old New-Yorkers who when
they have friend retur6 from Europe fun OF the
glories OF the Paris Exposition will listen fairly
patiently to recital OF the tale of beauty and grandeur
for while and then sniff the air and remark to tne
wellmeaning rclator that the Paris Exposition il
doubtless all right In its way, but did he ever ViSs
the American Institute Fair on good lively ID,
This old New-yorker has attended the American lhsu'
tute exhibitions regularly for forty years, more or
less, and when folks talk 10 him about the Worlu
Fair In '92 he calls their attention to the fact tns.
there is pretty good sort Of show at Third ave. a
Sixty third-st now. But this style of New-fofAs.
isn't numerous-he is fast becoming extinct ~
were better for tho American Institute there ~e''
more Of his kind
The Institute Fair this year seems 10 DO a"u
up to the average and any one attending VIII MN ~
his old friends among the articles exhibited ana sum
ones. AS usual they range from the iaoop ~
sold by the demurc maiden to the big conee Po' va"
another demure maiden inside, and reach from ao
quiet but substantial rock-crshing machines " ~
orchestra, and cover the wants of mankind rom Wv
India rubber artificial flowers to the portaDie hon9O
which you take down and hide In the cellar ~hon 'A'
tax collector comes around. There Is inc na'
chopping machine for the agriculturist, the gasone
for the manufacturer the nsphtha launch for the SEQ
faring man, the glass rollingph for the mousse" ,,
the PAPER mache horse for the rfman, the arino,a
cakes for the physician and the rubber mowers lof ID"
botanst. Everybody ought TO be happy.
Agriculture, that foundation on which we arc VIZ
so many other things rest, is not very largely rep'
sented at the Fair. Perhaps this may De accoun'oN
for by the fact of the VIGOROUSLY light crops "a.
Manhattan Island Of late years. In point Oh iAe
there isn't any hay-cutting machine bu' .
are some ears Of corn and an oh'No
machine. II you don't know what ensiiage Is !ou
might as well be told and have IT done WIN
Ensilaee Is winter food for the patient ana hu'r0
COW. The exhibitor explains all about IL
really prepared corn. The corn is not planted III WIG
usual hills but in rowsdrills IS the technca ora'
This gives mono of IL TO the acre. but IL knocks inc
poetry out of the cornfed It doesn't leave any roon
for pumpkins and a conheld without yellow pump
kins is pretty poor affair. Just before the ea'e -
corn harden and begin 10 whisper Of hus king bees anu
going home with the girls after they are over Sio
ruthless hand Of the modern improved farmer cuts 'uo
stalks Oft close tie ground, and the whole crop Is
then carted 70 the barn on patent wagon ana run
through the latest ensisge machine which chops UP
stalks leaves husis, ears OF corn, and sometimes
the hired mans fingers There is no hushng ho
finding red ears; no pumpkins. no ,ackian~rh''
nothing but the steady hum OF the steam enSii'e'
machine, and, perhaps. sometimes, few earnest r
maTlB by the hired man. After The corn is choppoa
up IL Is put IN the sllO, WnefC u reIhdthS hn0
fruit in glass jar till 1t is taken out and introduced
to the notice OF the There is no so on e1h'N-
ton but the man SAYS that the farmer buys the en-
sage cutter and makes his own silo. Cows are very
fond Of ensage, and 1t is said TO be rare ana Dau
tfuI sight to see a COW hold up her plate for more
The man says that one farmer up near Albany Keeps
his COWS In the barnyard all summer and feeds them
cnsllage and nothing else. He predicts that every
body will do this in few years, It seems that the
tha hafc and ayv nrnb
have 10 gop along with the genuine cornfeld Pretty
soon farm will consist OF machine painted red,
white and blue and small box OF chemicals be
tween scientific farming and Indacrubber flowers the
soil is fast becoming superhuous, and In few years
we can lay the surface of the earth into basebal
grounds and two-me race tracks.
There are really a great many wonderful things at
the Fair besides the rubber roses There is the
vaIrI,s leather an inch thick which makes IL appear
that the walrus would do well the Worlds Fair
Site Committee-he could stand the criticism, you
know Then there is an exhibitor OF lard-syJine
lard, that is-who gives written guarantee when he
sells any that his lard contains no cottOnsced OH and
dealer In cotton seed lard who when he disposes of
my, offers to furnish bond that It contains hog
ard This Is a cheerful world and don't all look
things alike OF course there is mnce meat for that
Kind Of pies and there is also condensed mlce-meat
little of which will make great many pies that
I YOU are going to travel In the desert you take
little of concentrated mince along and have
Die all tho way across. This is more modern improve
nent. After awhile Wen only have to take a tea
spoonful of something out Of small tin can, drink
pint of water, and there Wen be. We should also
Ook at the "plastering FIBRE" sort Of stun that
loes away with good old plastering hair. There
llso of course perforated tin surfaces exhibition
% spread your plaster on, thus doing away with Iath
md little further metal shingles, which super
We shall live in tin houses, with proper frontdoors
md sheet-iron steps, and with guttapercha flowers
blooming among the cotton fibre grass under the
eIluIoid trees.
A fluent young man has new kind of tsrgetpIstOl
which shoots a little short arrow with rubber cap
IN the end. which acts sucker producing a
ticks TO whatever II strikes. He says It is very
pleasant TO in the parlor and blaze away at the
Ill paintings and brio brac. 1t Is perfectly harmless
md is the sort Of pistol they ought carry In Ken
lucky, but they never Will The handwriting burglar
Who must needs labor through the long night while
her folks in their comfortable beds, is not over
ooked, and several noisy alarms shown which
annOt fail 10 break the mOnOtOny for him. Nor Is
he hardy scrubwoman, who sits down outside Of the
umbles into the street, forgotten-there is a patent
hahn on exhibition which fastens securely and the
windows are cleaned IN perfect safety. Another man
+ trying to neutralze this with window sash which
'pens in like cupboard well slides, you don't
rave TO get outside to wash your windows. These
Exhibitors don't speak to each other. Another I'm
proved article is horse-bt 1t works like an ordinary
't so long as the animal behaves himself, but let
lin try to run away and you pun string, touch
spring, or do something. and lit
is rubber claps down either nostr
and there you have him. no breath no rum the
exhibitor remarks 1t is supposed that the speed
oI the horse can be regulated exactly with this
apparatus close the nostrils one-thrd for galop,
lAi Tor trot two-thiIds for a walk and shut them
-huiely Whom you want 10 stop and tie your
morse, thus saving hltching straps, weights, etc
rms ma. not be the intention OF the inventor but 1t
looks reasonable
Everything on exhibition nearly IS improved There
are Improved coffee pots, with which the average