Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1889-09-20
DOCTORS pLA7'ruoEs.
How They Cajole. Humor. ms'''ts
Rel,aye Their Patients.

Relfavo Their fatieus@
"1]lness is always serious, is ono
of the stock phrases of the business .a
Ike doctor "Persevere with the
medicine is stock remark worth
several hundred a year to some men
we know. The professional ar
which is now acquired requires a
genius to originate, but it is easy
enough to affect It, Inc A no I'VE prIS
gers are dying the death: The PUBIC
nowadays objects to being made III,
and, as a rule, in the better class Oh
practices, medicines are either sup
piled free of charge, or prescriptions
are written; but generally the people
in the middle ranks OF life who en-
ploy the general practitioner object
10 90 to chemist for medicines; con-
sequently the drugs are dispensed by
the doctor. We fear that many OF the
most successful of general practltlon-
ers owe their position simply to their
proficiency in the art of pleasing.
81 never contradict a patient, " ono
of the most astute of our friends used
to remark. Curious are the expe-
riences on this head; we will give q
case in point. Mrs. A. came regular
ly to the surgery of professional
friend; her disorder was chronic. In
sober truth, she simply fancied that
her skin was too tight for her. For
months the bi-weelkly consultations
continued. The practitioner was
aware that the lady was malade inn
aginaire, and he rang the changes on
tonics and placebos. They did no
harm; he argued they might do good
by their effect on the mind. At length
our friends conscience began to prick
him. He hemmed, he hawed; at last
he told Mrs. A. in polite language that
she had nothing the matter with her.
Mrs. A. rose indignant. "And have
you been physicking me all this time
If nothing was the matter1" Mrs. A.
left in rage, and, walking straight
to another practitioner in the neigh
borhood, she explained to him that
our friend "did not understand her
constitutions" in fine, that he had com
mitted the browning sin of telling her
that she had no disorder. The rival
practitioner was wise man. He sym
pathized, he prescribed, he is possibly
prescribing still, and still, probably,
the unfortunate lady suffers from the
skin, which is too tight. This is nc
historic pour rire; it is solemn fact.
One of the most tradesmen like prac-
titioners we know, in defending what
we fear can only be called charlatan-
ism, remarks: "They likeit, sir. They
will have it," This practitioner al
ways uses the stethoscope, and take.
the patients pulse with sphygmo
graph; he has the reputation among
his numerous patients Of being very
scientific man; he has a large and
wealthy connection in fashionable
suburb. Really his ignorance is Grass.
Many general practitioners seek tc
dazzle their patients by a dashing
turnout, an affectation Of hurry and
hustle. One eminent accoucheur is
said to have actually driven himself
into practice. He was known to his
confreres as "Jehu." He affected 6
yellow brougham and pair Of car
riage dogs; he drove with jobbed
horses at rate of about fourteen
miles an hour; he soon became talked
of, and died a rich man. The cleve,
practitioner never Fingers" hemakes
himself desired, and lets the patient
conclude that his moments are pre-
cious. AS rule, in general practice
the patient is never told he has moth
ing the matter with him. HE mus
be i'll or he wouldn't come to me" i!
the natural sophistry Of the genera
practitioner. He is probably right; fol
there is something consoling to the
generality of people in the mere seeing
Of a doctor. AS rule, the genera,
practitioner, if an honest man, succeed
in gaining his patients confidence
Saturday Review.