davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
FOR THE LADIES.

AT 6 church fair in Troy they blindfolded the
men and let 'em kiss the women at Is cents apiece
One kissed his wife seven different times. and
when he aseertained the base deception he de-
manded the return of his money and got it-De-
troit Free Press
a fine farm on the mesa have put in about 240
of wheat this season, and are still blowing. Mrs
Meade, not caring to do the housework for a hired
man, concluded il was cheaper to hire girl and
do the pIowing herself. Knowing how his wife
enjoyed all outdoor exercise Mr.. Meade accepted
the proposition, at the same time thinking that
few days of plowing wond satisfy her wife. But
there he was mistaken. They began about Thanks
giving, each having q four-hurse team and gang
pIow. Mrs. Meade who tends to her own team
has up to date, pIowed and sown much as her
husband. Up to two years ago Mrs. Meade had
never been farm, having been born and reared
in city. She Is refined and an Intelligent lady,
capable of conversing upon any subject from but
ter-maIng to high art or the political issues of the
day.-SGn Jdciato Register.
Only Half the Job-Hobhs-T understand that
Dobson's wife is a German, and that he mastered
the German language TO win her.
Jones-Well, he mHst have expended all his en-
ergies on the language, then. He has never mas
tered her Burlington Free Press.
Mrs. Mackay has been ordering some new
gowns in Paris, which described as surprising
all previous efforts of the modistes. One is of old
rose satin covered with white lace, and studded
with $4,000 worth of gems.
Says Mrs Lucy Stone: :" We shall never have
the churches full of men until the pulpts are filed
by women"
"A Mattapoisett woman says she made 100 pies
last year and that she could prove it If her husband
had lived until January.-Boston Post
--Over-gaiteTs now the rage among Stylish
women. They cost all the way from 81 for plain to
S45 for those with mother of pearl buttons with
silver or gold buckles.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21

EDITOR NATIONAL TRIBUNE: / notice your
article on Chaplains" in THE NATIONAL TRI-
BUNE of the 18th of January. 1t is good, and, in
general sense true; but there were exceptions.
In our (Siekles'sl brigade we had two Chap
lains who labored conscientiously to do their
duty. Father OHagan, of the 73d n. Y. I'D
Fire Zouaves) in time of battle was at the
front ready TO give help and relief to the
wounded and absolution and clean passport
across the dark river to the dying. l have
seen him many times amidst the flying missiles,
perfectly calm and fearless by the side of those
in distress. He is now dead but so we'll be-
loved and respected was he, though a Jesuit
Father, that my other pet Chaplain, now
Connecticut Blue-st0cking Presbyterian, so
highly esteemed him that he wrote an obitu-
ary notice that was copied generally in the
Catholic papers.
The other (the pet) Chaplain was, or is now,
the Rev. DR.. Jos. Fl. Twichell, of the Asylum
St. Church, Hartford Conn. He and Father
Q'Hagan were great friends, and emulated each
other in their zeal and love for the soldiers
under their charge. Many poor wife and
mother may thank them for money that but
for them would have gone to the sutler for
whisky. No, a Chaplain, if he does his duty, is
just as valuable as any other officer.
Chaplain Twichell belonged to my regiment
(71st N. Y.), and he is now as we'll beloved by
his flock in Hartford as he was by his regiment.
As for fighting Chaplans, if duty had required
it. Twicholl and Father O'Hagan would have
led a charge as steadily as any other mortals.-
II. L. POTTER.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
OUR OFFERS
ANOTHER,
A HORSE IT EERgs.

We know that many of our readers drive something
fast. They want to know just how fast, and have
procured the Horse Timer which viii settle it to q
NTH of q second.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
PERSONS AND THINGS.

w. o. Stoddard urges that as the President is
Commander-in-Chef of the Army and Navy he
should, when he retres from Office be allowed the
pay of the highest officer in those arms on the re-
tired list.
"A mule in Mount Vernon has immortaized it,
self by kicking the cheek of a sewing machine
drummer.
The Universities Press edition of the English
Bible contains a typographical error, which has
remained uneerrected for 90 years. II is in the 18th
of the 1lth chapter of Zeohariah which reads
Woe to the idol shepherd" The word idol n
should be "idle"
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21

The piece that passeth understandiug-A
piece of bakery mince- -pie.-Terre Hauts Express.
An Oakland girl has an admirer who always
brings her chewing-gum. She calls him her
Gumbeau.-Pittsb1Tg Chronicle.
The most comfortable throne in Europe is
that of His Majesty King Alfonso of Spain. 1t
is his nurses lap.-BostOn Herald.
If you see man go smiling down the street
on day like this it is hard to tell whether he
is an iceman or it is twins.-Pitts5Hrg Chronicle
A German servant has discovered that plants
can think. The trouble with the symplocarpus
fcetidus is that it thinks out loud.-SoaerriHe
Journal
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21

a eamel's-hair brush in wash-basin as the
cooking went on. From a cooked dog over
head, the TAIL with this little black tip of hair
upon it. hung down; and the stew itself as
served was cut up into small pieces | have
seen no fresh rats meat as yet, but dried
rats are adelicacy. And the flesh of the cat, as
well as that of the dog, is cleaned in the same
way as we clean pigs. The carcases are put
into tubs of boiling water and the hair scraped
of. The cats are kept outside of the restau-
rants IN little square cages of wood, and they
are killed upon order. Their meat is higher
priced than that of dogs, and they are esteemed
better eating Only the poorer classes eat
dogs meat, and the restaurants serving this
meat are usually for this class.
Many of the best dinner-parties of Canton
are served on the water and among the tens
of thousands of boats here are some floating
hotels. These are gorgeously decorated, and
they form at night a most picturesque sight as
they move here and there over the river. They
are painted in brilliant c0lors, and they have
small-pane windows of stained glass, which
sometimes wall the whole sides of the vessel
1t is not the proper thing for Chinaman, so
am told, to invite his friends to dinner at his
own house, and when he wants to have feast
he rents one of these boats, gets lot of sing
song girls, and invites his friends. The dinner
may be good, but the singing is sure to be bad
The Chinese have no music to speak OF, though
they are susceptible of being trained, and the
most horrid noises have yet heard outside of
an asylum of raving maniacs is this sing
song" music of the Chinese / attended con-
cert in Shanghai where 800 Cinnamon sat and
smoked while they listened to the catterwaul-
ing of dozen aImond-eyed, highly painted
beauties, accompanied by stringed instruments
not unlike the guitar. The girls had long
metal sheathes on their fingers to protect their
fngernails and they used these to pick the
strings. A little of the music went great
way, and the same may be said of all that l
have heard in China. The best singing is that
of the mission schools, where the children sing
our American tunes to Chinese words.
FRANK G.. CARPENTER.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21

of Canton, and to the southeast lies Whampoo,
where the ocean steamers anchor to do their
trading with Canton. These hills are to me
the wonder Of China, and one of the wonders Of
the world. They contain the graves of hun
dred generations and their sides, sloping sew
eral miles from top to plain, are covered with
great tombs, each made in the shape of four
horseshoes, rising one above another, receding
and growing smaller as they rise, and forming
great seats, where one can rest and look on the
wonderful panorama below. There are thou
sands of these tombs on every hillside, and we
rode, doubt not, through millions Of dead in
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
Proper Precaution.

Tailor (taking measure)-Seventeen half
twenty-seyen quarter, thirty-eight half. stop
moment (Gets his head down under the Gus
toners arm, with his feet upon the table) make
that thirty-seven quarter; l see one lung is
gone.
Customer-Yes, it's all gone-one lung.
Tailor (dubiously)-You understand this is
to be cash trade. of course?
Customer-Certainly, cash on the nail.
Tailor-Twenty- nine half-nineteen at the
knee. That's all, sir. alright, sir. The goods
shall be ready next week, sir
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21

The Chinese are good farmers, though they
use the rudest Of implements. They have the
plow, the hoe the harrow and the rake. The
plow is broad blade of iron fitted into
handle such as was used by the Egyptians
thousands OF years ago. The teams in South
China are usually of water buffalo. The ami
mails are the ugliest species of the cow genus,
are drab in color and have a sparse covering of
hairs which stand straight out all over their
angular bodies Their horns are fat, and they
do not stand up like those of COW, but come
around back just over the eyes. They are
harnessed by wooden yoke, which rests upon
the shoulders, and which is fastened to the
ploW by ropes. Men are often harnessed up
with these buffalo, and the plows are always
held by men or boys. These plows cost about
81 apiece. They merely scratch the earth in
stead Of turning it over, and in the vicinity of
Canton much of the land is spaded and hoed
1t is arranged in terraces, one patch rising
above the other, so that the whole can be irri-
gated Standing upon the White Cloud Hills,
a chain of low mountains which extends
through this part of China, one can see gardens
of this kind spread out below him for a radius
Of 10 miles. 1t is patchwork of silvery wa
ter, green fields and plowed ground. Hun
dreds of villages, of from 300 to 5000 and up
ward each, dot the plain on every side, and
through it all runs a network of waterways,
some of which are covered with great Chinese
junks with bat-wing sails of cloth and bamboo
poles, which stand out against the sky. Away
OF in the distance you see the Pagoda towers
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
SOME CATHOLIC FIGURES.
The Catholic population of the United States is

The Catholic population of the United States is
given as s,l57 676
There are7 353 Catholic churches, 2770 stations
that is, places where there not resident pastors
and / $50 chapels.
The total number of priests in the United States
is s, ,1f8. OF these zoos members of religious
orders and 6, ITO secular clergymen.
The Catholics have 100 orphan asylums, with
q S5S inmates 81 theological seminaries, with
1870 students; l24 colleges $40 academies, 2,799
parochial schools, with 597 9l pupils.
The Catholic Church dignitaries of the United
Statesare one Cardinal II Archbishops, y Bishops
one Prefect-Apostoiic and eight mitered Abbots
Those in charge of the seven Yicariates Apostolic
are Bishops
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
longtime Possession.
IN IL

A yourgster, while handling big army
musket in the streets the other day, was
promptly arrested and taken before magis-
trate.
Where did you buy this gum" inquired
his Honor.
Didn't buy it." returned the youngster,
rather sulkily.
"Where did you get it, then2"
What, the gun?n
"Yes!n
"Why, that has been in our family ever
since it was little pistol"
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
OUR UNEQUALED OFFER.
CAPTURING A LOCOMOTIVE,

A BOOK OF THRILLING INTEREST,
which is literally true. No secondary incident In the
whole produced such deep sensation rs the exploits
of the % Engine Thieves" the rebels designated
Them This book written by of the survivors tells
the story in very straightforward fascinating way. II
As handsomely gotten up and well illustrated and every
one interested in the should not fail to read It. IL s
lust the thing to put into the hands of boys who thirst
for stories OF adventure and danger. Agents can
make fine wages selling it. It is just the thing for
teachers clergymen lawyers sewing machine and nsuF
ance agents. Students and men and women who ara
unable to do bard physical labor TO sell Amy capable
active man woman make from s. to $40 day tax
ing orders for It, Write for terms agents. etc Sent 20
any address on receipt of s15o. Address,
THE NATIONAL TRIBUNE PUBLISHING Co.,
Washington, D. G.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
The Female Idea.
rPhHndelnhin Rscord |

First Female Juror (some years hence)-
That fool of woman who wants divorce ad-
mits that her husband hung up a lot of pictures,
and put up 10 curtains and lengths of stove
pipe without saying one bad word or even los
ing his temper.
Second Female Juror-Yes, the man must be
an angel. Let's give her the divorce, and may
be one of US can get him.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
Mexican Funerals,

"The Mexicans," says a traveller, "have 8
very queer way of burying the dead. The
corpse is tightly wrapped in century plant mat
ting, and placed in a coffin rented for about %
cents. One or two natives, as the case may be,
place the coffin on their heads and go in trot
to the grave, where the body is inferred, and
the eotliu is then returned. The wealthy class
use the street-cars as hearses, and the friends
follow beside the car on foot.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
SCOTS Catalogue of Flowers.

The annual catalogue of Robert Scott & Son,
Philadelphia, Pa, for 1885, contains the most
complete assortment of roses, as we'll as many
other specaties in flowers; it is prOfusely Illus
trated with engravings and colored plates Of
the latest novelties and is sent free to any
reader of this paper upon application.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
Remedy Worse than the Disease.

Exceedingly Long Patient-I say, Doctor,
are you going to put that mustard plaster on my
feet to draw the pain from my head?
Doctor-Yes Why?
Exceedingly Long Patient-Well I object
I'd rather have it where it is than drawn down
through six feet and five inches ofnew territory.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
Reputations Made in a Dav

Are precious scarce. Time tries the worth of a
man medicine. Hostetter's Stomach Bitters is
thirty years growth, and like those hardy chcns
that garnsh the crevices of AlaslSa's rocks, it
fourishes perennially. And its reputation has as
firm a base the rocks themselves. No medicine
is more highly regarded as n remedy for fever and
ague, bilious remient constipation, liver and kid
uey disorders, nervousness and rheumatism.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
The Other Fellow.
ED1 rnJ

At prayer meeting held recently in Bos-
ton suburb " brother" arose, and, after prais-
ing Gods goodness to him, concluded: "And
finally got in debt, and my debt instead of
decreasing increased, and to-day / owe $500.
Yet God has kept me in perfect peace of mind"
How about the other fellow.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
One Of President CleveIand's Mistakes.
IN y Herald

We believe Mr.. Cleveland would have benefit
ed himself and his party greatly if he had taken
the Herald'S advice aud that of many Democrats
and summoned Congress to meet in the April
after his Inauguration. He and his party
would in that case have come face to face, would
have got acquainted with each other in an or
derly, useful way, and he might not have shown
so much dislike and contempt for Congressman
as he did when they strayed in to see him dur
ing his first Summer, singly, and usually on
Office seeking errauds alone
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
SCIENTIFIC CHAT.

The Atlantic liners accomplish their high speed
with q consumption OF one and one-half to one and
three-quarters pounds of coRl per horse power.
-Snowhakes are said to be the result of low-Iying
air currents whose temperatures We're much lower
than those of the earth's surface.
-Four negatives were recently taken of a can
non-bal that occupied only one-third of second in
passing given space.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
PLoHING IN CHINA.

going from Canton II miles into the country.
Here the Chinese for generations have buried
their dead, and the ghosts of Chinese ancestors
who inhabit these hills must be more in num-
Der than the teeming thousands which work
on in Canton and the surrounding country,
and which at certain times during every
year come here to worship at the tombs of
their ancestors
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21

find the frstcat dog and rat meat that have
seen in China here in Canton. visited dog and
cat restaurant yesterday, and saw black-dog's
flesh stewing and steaming 1t looked like a
piece of fresh pork, and was relished with
smacking of the lips by the pig-tailed, yellow
faced men who bought 1t for about cent or so
plate. The flesh of black dogs and black
cats is especially esteemed in China And in
this dog stew / noticed that about an inch of
hair had been left on the end of the dogs tail,
and these hairs f0ated around in the SCUM like
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
A Weary Evening.

jerks Ito old friend in theater lobby)-I no.
tice you come ont after every act. You are not
drinking, hope?
Blinks-Oh, no; but it's rather tiresome in
side. | came with my own sister this time.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
They Disturbed His slumbers


Jaek-Say, Gus, viii you please leave your
trousers out in the hall to might.
Gus-Good Heavens! Jack, what do you
want me 10 do that for?
Jack-Why, the pattern is so loud that they
keep me awake
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
All Mixed Tn-


LbuftthgtOH FTte FTeSs.I
Tomlinson-HellO, Bodger! What makes
you look so excitedP
Bodger-Why you see, they've got twins at
sisters. One of 'em is boy and one of em is
girl, and blamed if that doesn't make me an
uncle and an aunt both
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
DOGS AND RATS.
A Look at Some of the DelicacieS Of
the Canton Restaurants.

How the Celestials Dine-FIoating Hotels and Pussy
ReStaurants-The Cab Of SOuth China-The TOmbS
of One Hundred GenerafiOns-HoW the Chinese
Treat FOreigners-Our Correspondent Stoned
Chinese Farms and Farming.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
Wild Western Justice.

A Neshkora young man, who took Young
lady sleigh riding and made her walk home
from the country because she displeased him,
was fined $50 and sentenced to spend 20 days
in jail.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21

Some people change their minds every dav
and yet never have decent ones around
Rochester Host- -Ezpress.
A wedding-dress reminds one Of the "late
unpleasantness" in that it is wore for the union.
--Konkers Statesman.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21

stucco and stone, trees are trained in curious
ways, and we saw some in the shapes of birds,
fishes and baskets. The Chinese are among
the best gardeners in the world. They delight
IN the curious, and the interior of Chinese
garden is full Of surprises. There are rustic
bridges, tiled Summer houses, and here at
Canton everything grows so luxuriently that
in going from one Of these narrow, bad-smell-
ing streets through the blue-brick walls into
gentleman's garden you seem to be entering
that Of Eden in its bloom. Here is the palm,
the banana and the banyan tree. The lotus
covers miniature lakes with its great leaves,
and black wood seats, stiff in their Chinese
make, stand out against background of green.
The gold fish swims and the bird sings, and
in the heart of the city you seem to be miles
away in the country or mountains.
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21
CHINESE REsrAuRANr.

ray of light shows through their chinks, and
Chinese houses have no windows opening on
the street. The walls of the buildings are
high and the roofs almost meet In the day
time, when this southern sun blazes it's bright
est, it is dark and misty in these Canton streets
at night the air becomes pitch, and the only
relief from the darkness is at long intervals,
when dim, foggy light through great lam
tern made of buffalo horns in little pieces
scraped thin, and fastened together so that it
forms large globe of amber, family burns.
There are few rays of light at the feet of
your coolies These come from little cubby-
holes at the side of each store, dug out of the
wall, as it were. Here burn few sticks of
incense, and the Chinese storekeepers thus try
TO propitiate the god of fortune and TO have
him watch over their possessions They are
most superstitious, and many of them have
shrines in their stores, before which incense
burns all day long. There is little night life
in Canton. There are few people on the streets,
and the city seems dead. The streets are filled
with smoke from the incense burning and one
looks for thief at the corner of every street.
You see no policemen, and here and there you
hear the clap of the night-watch. The Chinese
use watchmen and these have two sticks which
they pound together as they walk up and down
their beat, letting the people within know that
they are on guard and warning the thieves, if
any there be at work, of their coming. There
was such a watchman connected with our Le-
cation at Peking. heard his clapping many
a midnight while there, and it was as destruc-
tive Of sleep as the baby on your block.
How would you like to dine at Chinese
restaurant?
You may find hundreds of them here in Can
ton, and they are the big business buildings of
the city. Thekitehen is on the ground floor, and
the poorer people dine on the floor above this.
The prices rise as you 60 upward, and the best
meals are served on the second and third floors
The food is served in small dishes, more like
cups and saucers than plates, and the tea is al
ways served in a covered cup without saucer
Half-naked walters, with pig tails, bring in
the dishes, and the cook only knows of what
they are made. The ordinary dinner for a
man of means consists of 10 or 90 dishes, and
the first course is fruit. Soups and stews come
next and it is customary to smoke between
the courses. Chopsticks are used instead of
knives and forks, and if you want to compli-
ment any person who is dining at the same
table with you, you will thrust your chopstiek
into one of the daintiest morscs on your plate
and with bow offer to put it into your neigh
boris mouth You will find no cloth on the
table, and you can wipe your lips on piece of
brown paper. After dinner is over you will be
given wet towel which has been dipped in
warm water and wrung out, and with this the
guest washes his face and neck. This is the most
approved method of Chinese washing, and the
The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1889-02-21

A slight cold, if neglected. often attacks the
lungs. BRowN's BRONCHIAL TRoCHEs give sure and