Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1889-11-21
LEARNING THE ART or LEAVING.
Visitors Who Cannot Realize That They
Are Making Bores OF Themselves.

Visitors Who Cannot Realize That They
Are Making Bores OF Themselves.
When Madame de Stael visited
Weimar with the avowed intention OF
intellectually capturing the literary
lions of the day-Goethe and Schiller
she made one fatal mistake: she staid
too long. Goethe wrote to Schiller
Madame de Stael is a bright enter.
tanning person, but she ought to know
when it is time to 90" Besides not
knowing when to 90, it is evident from
incidents recorded of her journey thai
she did not know how to 20. She
fingered after she had started. 1t is
related of her that at one place after
she had announced her intention OF
departing in the morning she started q
conversation which she vigorously kept
up until it was so near noon that her
host and hostess could but press her to
stay for luncheon. This over, the con
Versation was again resumed, nor al.
lowed to flag until it was so near eve.
ming that the strained courtesy of her
entertainers could but suggest that the
horses be taken from the carriage.
which had waited at the gate all day,
and that she stay another night, which
she did
1t is Disraei who, in 'Lothair,' puts
in the mouth of Theodore the senti.
ment that no one should ever say good
by, but in departing should fade away
like a summer cloud. 1t is probable
that the great statesman and novelist
wrote this after parting interview
with some one who had bored him with
tedious farewells who understood not
the art of leaving. For in the narrow.
est and choicest circle of friends and
acquaintance there are usually some
persons the pleasure of whose visits or
calls, whether of business or pleasure,
is married by the fact that they do not
seem to know how to 90. For when a
friend or caller departs we are either
glad, sorry, or Indifferent. If we are
glad we desire to be brief; if we
are sorry the quicker the painful
scene is ended the better; if we are
indifferent we grudge the draft on our
time, II we are busy, as the most of US
are, with the pressing affairs Of life.
The art of leaving is less understood
by women than by men, The habits
# business, the recognized fact that
to businessman tir'e is money, the
throng and press and eXactingness of
business lite all tend to make men who
live in cities the best possible exem-
plars of the tiue art of leaving quickly
and neally. A businessman social
call is usually a model of good man
uers in this respect. When he has said
what he has to say and listened to what
there is to hear he takes his hat, SAYS
"Good-evening,n aud is out of your
presence without giving any time or
chance for the too often tedious and
embarrassing commonplaces Of mutual
invitations and promises to coil again
which seem to be kind If social
formula with women. In striking con-
trast with this neat and skillful method
of cutting short the parting words of
an interview or call is the too common
social practice of visitors who, COM
mencing to leave, seem temporarily to
abandon their purpose and then linger
as though it were a kind of compile
ment to the visited party to appear
loath to part company Who does not
dread the visitor who starts, then
thinks of something else to say; rises,
and then thinks of another subject of
conversation; nearly reaches the door
aud then has another revelations;
reaches the door, and, most probably
holding it open, is aroused 10 a degree
of mental briliancy that threatens his
health aud that of mis- host or hostess
by long OBTAINING of both in a cold
draft while he discoursesp What tax
on the patience and politeness OF tie
listener, who yaiuly strives by assent
ing instantly to every proposition TO
end the interview and break the re-
straiuing bond OF polite attention.
The equally annoying counterpart Of
the tedious caller who does not under
stand the art Of leaving, is found in
the person who seems anxious TO de-
tain the caller attempting to leave, and
who makes protests or introduces new
subjects of conversation at the critical
moment.