Morning journal and courier., 1889-10-11
WORRIED.

The man who can't get credit is never
worried by duns.-Boston Courier.
Nothing looks more like man of sense
than fool who holds his tongue.-Saxon
Proverb.
Stranger-"What in connection with bioy-
Gle riding strikes you most forcibly." Bicycle
rider-"The road" ."-Harper's Bazaar.
That Looks Discouraging.-It ia figured
that it would take $100, ,000, 900 to give every
poor person in the world an oyster stew, a
roast Of beef and a mince pie, and the phil
anthropist with cash capital Of 81 may well
feel discouraged. ed.-Dstroit Free Press.
Course of Dieting Family Physician
''Nothing will do your daughter any good
unless she controls her appetite for sweets
and rich dishes. She must live On the plain
est food, and very little Of 1t, for months"
Mother-"very we'll, I'll send her to the
boarding school I use to attend. New
York Weekly.
Judge-"Now, madam. don't object to this
question. Tell the court your age" Miss
Longout-sI do not see that it is competent
evidence, your honor" Judge-"Why not9"
Miss L.-''You see, do not know it of my
own knowledge; it is merely what was told
to me-" Judge-''True; you need not an
r."-America.
A Late Comer.-Uncle Anss-"Hit's no
use adodgin' 'roun' no mo-. I CUB mahself
up" Captain Of the Atlanta Greys.. ..lout for
skirmish drilD-"Who are you" Uncle
Anse-'I's Mistah Legree's Anse. Tse been
a-hidin' in d. swamp fer go'n' on yeahs an
yeahs, en- now dat lyin' coon ober dar done
tell me d. wah ana ober but see It amt,
an you C'nfed'rits I'll habit kotch mo aftah
all."-Puck.
"You are letting your beard grow againv'
eyes, old fellow, you see my wife can't en-
dure full beard for me because 1t is so
deucidly unbecoming. he birthday is In
much for present az to have me have my
beard shaved off, and that costs me only if
teen cents-the cheapest way can get out
of it, you see. do it every year. r."-Flie-
gende Blatter.
"Reginald, my dear, can you not take the
girls out where they can gather some autumn
leaves tomorrow Yes, I guess go; but
what is the matter with the trees about the
place. There Is as good variety of leaves
within 100 feet of the house as there is with
| in ten miles" ooh, the girls don't care
| anything about the leaves, Reginald. They
| want to eat sandwiches and jelly cake in the
| woods. Hartford Post.
| Fast Travelling.-Horse dealer-'I war.
rant the horse sound and kind" Possible
buyer-"How about speeds" "Speeda Well,
| ri tell you. Old man Grimes died the other
day-died rich, you know-and it was un-
derstood that his will was to be read at the
house after the funeral was over. Well, sir,
was out on the road with this horse that
day. and hang ms If didn't beat the
Grimes family back FROM the cemetery."-
New York Weekly.
Grimes (society reporter for the Haut Ton
i-"Fine reception at Blepsover's." City ed
itor-"Worth a celumna' Grimes-"Easy
It was immense. rang at 7. Butler came
and said Col. Blepsover couldn't be seen; bat
the colonel had heard my voice and ordered
the laokey to admit me. Then he came and
took me down into the basement where they
were preparing supper. I tell you it wa'
grand! Then he seated me at little table
opened bottle of wine and ordered me 6
lunch. Then another bottle and points about
the reception. Then he led me out by tbs
basement door, after giving me another bot
| tie to take with me and q bundle of cigars
Tell you, was treated like perfect gentle
man. ."-Puck.