Morning journal and courier., 1889-12-27
BLASTS.

 one cat can make spring.-Exohange
 Fowls cannot be classed as gourmands, if they do eat by the peck.-Pittsburg Chreni- cle. ,.,--
 A rooater doesn't vary his drinks. Wherev- CT he goes he takes cocktail. il.-Binghamton Republican.
 Women rarely are great inventors, though they are often the first to discover new wrinkles.-Terre Haute Express.
 It seems somewhat paradoxica1, but it's a fact that many people take high seats at the theater because they are 1ower.-Amerioan Commercial Traveller.
 Mrs. Newmarried-My husband is the smartest man on the staff of the Blowgun.
 Mrs. Beenthere-Who told you 80?
 Mrs. Newmarried-Why, he did. Law renee American.
 Minnie-Nr. Blink actually proposed to me last night. I never was so surprised in all my life. Namie-You needn't have been. His sole ambition is to be thought eccentric. - Terre Haute Express. The consistent minister will not preach steadily for two hours upon the iniquity oi leading members of the congregation how ht liked the Sermon.-Somerville Journal. Hostess-Miss Highsee, won't you favel the company with a songi Miss Highsse- Please excuse me, Mrs. Upjohn. You have all been listening to Patti for a week, and have such a cold this evening fear the con. trast would be quite noticeable. Chicago l Tribune.
 It just shows on how little reputation can be built. Achilles has come laundering down the ages as the model brave warrior and yet every body knows that being solidly safe as long as he kept his heels out of sight he very likely was too big coward to run away.-Baltimore American. The decision of the judge of the East Bos. ton District court that clothes must be made to fit in order to insure their being paid fol is interesting. If the courts will now Icy down the law that every man shall pay his tailor bills when his clothes do it, the tailor will probably be willing to call it square, = Boston Herald.
 Bennis-Mamms, do people really buy babies.
 Mamma-Of course, child, of course. Rur | out now and play.
 Bonnie Gin a brown study)-Thsn why ii l it, mamma, that poor people buy more oi 'em than anybody else! e!-Northwest Nigga zine.
 There is one thing on which people gene rally agree, and that is the weather. When I you come out of the house in the morning tc go to business you meet your neighbor ane say "The weather is Q little mildsr." Ht will reply, "Yes; how's your family" WheI ! you get to your store someone will say, "Gooi morning; quite cold again." You will reply "Yes." A customer comes in and says, "Lit' | tie damp this morning." You will reply "Yes, quite damp" And so it goes all day We never disagree as to the weather.--Pough keepsis Eagle.
 A number of years ago school exhibition was on the-programme at Mukwanago, ant l on the night of the momentous event one O | the little girls who was to have taken part ir it lay dangerously sick at home. The doc 1 tor had just made his evening visit and pro nounced the case almost hopeless. when hel brother rushed into the house crying | Mamma, mamma, where's the comba want to comb my hair to go to the exhibi tion." "Sakes alive, Joseph" she replied "and your poor sister expected to die at an,
 minutei There, take the comb and g along with yer. I do believe you hat rather go to that old exhibition than to go t | your own sisters funeral. al."-Milwaukee Wis coneip.