The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1889-05-11
THE UBIaUITOus HEN.

A kind and considerate friend,
who realizes that we yearn ever
and anon for fresh, uncultivatod
fields in which to SOW the seeds of
reform, sends to us the. following
suggestion:
EDITOR P0ercRpTs: There is aa evil
f6x you to- tackle, eviIer than St. Georges
dragon, worse than the Mlnotaur or Giant
Despair or giants Pope and Pagan, or
any other evil, excepting only the dog
nuiaAnee--that il the chicken nuisance.
The whole city is one d minus d chicken
coop or poultry yard. Let the commits
sioners declare them anathema maranatha
and common outlaws, awarding the body
of any slain chicken to the slayer, and
insure against punishment.
ANATHEAA SUNT.
We have long recognized the
chicken as a creature of depraved
instincts and depredatory habits,
but we have hesitated to tackle it
for the reason that nothing else so
eAectualy destroys reformer's use
fulness as ignominious failure. We
have in our time tackled almost
everything from the fippityfopi-
tiveness of the Avenue dudes pant
les to the wishful ponderosities of
the sportive street-sweeper. But we
stand at the threshold of assault
on the chicken and our heart fails
us. The chicken is on the ground
floor of civilization. AS the Morse
mans giant said of the tiny plow-
man, it has come to stay. We may
choose the eagle for place on our
escutcheon, but the chicken will
continue to do business at the old
stand long after the gallus bird of
freedom has skrieked his latest
shrek and shut up shop. All, we
have looked upon the dregs of hu-
mility. We have drunk the bub-
bling wine and seen the sediment
escape. 'Tis the proud bird we
hunt to his destruction; the hum
bic, lowly chicken we preserve
Hath not Solomon, in all his glory,
said to US:
"Pride goeth before destruction, and a
naughty spirit before falla"
And has he not in his wisdom
advised US:
"Better 1t is to be of an humble spirit
with the lowly than to divide the spoil
with the proud7"
Now, we know just how annoy.
ing it is to plant garden seeds in q
nice, straight row on your own de.
mense and have them fructify all
over the adjacent territory; we are
aware of the yengeful spirit that
rises when you survey your neat
trimmed lawn from your parlol
window and see your neighbor's old
calico hen disdainfully wiping her
feet on your very own grass; we
know the prick and burn of your
shame when you set out to chase
that hen from your domain and
end by falling into the cistern while
she sits on the fence and taunts you
with exasperating remarks about
your disgracefully drenched condi
ton. We know all this. We have
sat upon the thistly edge of deep
despair ahd hurled sticks ano
stones and supervacaneous tin cans
at neighbours hens until our erst
while beatific spirit has become 6
misunderstanding imp with q
kink in it's tail and perdition fol
its fondest hope. We have sat uE
all night to be there when the hens
came through the fence at dawn
we have thrashed our neighbor
sassed his wife, made faces at hi
children, paid fines and costs; W.
tthave sworn ourself to the verge O
accommodation; we have rushed
to drink; we have plunged head
long into the downy depths of oul
midnight pillow and waterlogged
the bed with tears. And yet thu
hen, the patiently persistent, hum
BILE hen, has found an aperture be
meath our fence and placidly pur
sued our beetle-bugs and garneree
up the worms that slept and fat
tened underneath our turnip seeds
In other words we have, as it were
locked horns with the hen and w
betray no confidence when we say
the hens horns are mighty and viii
| prevail. Let the commissioners
| proclaim the chickens anathem'
maranatha if they will; there vii
be chickens to scratch for worm
that feed upon those same commits
sioners. Let the body polite pro
nounce the chickens common out
laws if it like; there will be chick
ems and chickens chickens whe1
that body polite lies moulderln!
in the grave. Well none of it. |
is no fight of ours. We say to you
| O. Stunt, shoe! shool Begone wit
your dangerous suggestions !
Washington Post.
Mail-carriers in Morocco are SAL
to avoid risk of losing their place
by oversleeping by tying q strln
on one foot and setting the end G
4 it on fire before they 60 to sleeI
| nj, .A.sss %koS, kn0w from 0XDe