Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1889-07-05
STUFF AND NONsFMcr
A WHEEL is more opt to oot

a horse. 'aa
FRUIT dealers are mostly all ~.
men-in the season. N'aage
BECAUSE man keeps hens is NJ
dence his name is hene,v. eA
A DOG will bark up tree g. .,
horse, if hitched to one too lone, WI
SHIPS are very polite. They d.,
meet the oceans wave with bow ''ys
Bill TELLS boy is rememboro,
history because he had an arro
cape.
WHEN wool falls in price, it j. 49,.
posed that the reduction takes n1a ap
from sheer necessity. '''''s
A DEAF and dumb married oo.,
may be rather quiet but they onch1 l4s
be unspeakably happy.
A POWDER trust is being Organic,
We never saw any powder We con,,
trust, except wet powder.
FISH are not weighed in their Nv,
scales, simply because fish scales W.,
not built that weigh. -Puch.
"NIY husband is just like a t,1,o,
candle" "How do you mean?n ~.
always smokes when he goes OUT
G1LEs-Doesn't your wife allow W,
to smoke in the house? Henpeck-
unless she wants the bugs smoked ~
her plants.-Epoch.
A LADY at the centennial banon.t
said that distinguished guest ate like
bird. 1t is to be hoped he did mi
take peck at every mouthful.
A FASHION journal says: @BonuetI
come high this season. The man VIII,
is compelled to pay for them is Of The
opinion that they come high every seal
son.
Mr.. BR1EF-Your uncle has directed
in his will that you shall have cent
Mr.. Spendthrift-Good, kind uncle
Gin sudden alarm). Are you sure NIL
Brief, it isn't counterfeit?
(: Cook (next day after her arrival-j
am often little hasty, madam, and
then I am apt to be saucy, but yod
needn't mind-you can make me little
present and I get pleasant again.
A.-CAN you let me have S.: I left
all my money at home and 1 haven't !
cent with me. B. Sorry I can't lend
you the SIS, but here is nickel car fare
Now you can ride home and get youI
| money.
"WERE there any deadly weapon
concealed about him?" inquired th1
Coroner. Nothing but this" replied
the witness. And amid the profouaI
| silence of the spectators he PLACID
flask of Iowa whisky on the table.
The MINISTER Ito new parishioneg)1
1 understand, dear sister, that your hs|
band has made a change for the better
The Parishioner-He has. He left the
Long Mines and is pitching for the Da
mond Daisies now. He gets 500 more
salary than he did.
YOUNG MAN docking over hotel
register)-I see that Joseph Crawfsh
Of Crawfshville, is stopping here
Where can I find him? He's an uncle
of mine. Clerk think you'll find
him in the elevator. He's been riding
up and down all the forenoon.
DRUGGIsT-What's the matter with
you? You seem excited. CLERK !
Heavens! I sold Mrs. Smiley strych1
nine instead of potash. Druggiss-
Well, if you aren't the most careless
idiot I ever saw! You seem to have no
idea of the value of strychnine.
| WHAT has happened to you? You
look so vexed." Il should say so. This
morning I was just going to be very
angry about something when some one
spoke to me, and 1 have been trying the
whole day to think what I was going %
be angry about, and 1 can't do it. y
FIRST TRAmp-Have you had any
victuals to-day, Sammy? Second
;Tramp-Not victual. Have YOU?
irNo." Hang the housekeeping sea-
son. I'll starve before it is over. You
can't strike a place where they don't
want you to work like hired man before
they'll give you mouthful to eat.
AN IDYL.
Adown vernal glade she hied,
And tuned her plaintive lay,
While tears fell fast, for her true love-
Alas was far away.
Anon, she saw q shepherd swain,
Who tended there his Sheep
His sympathetic breast was wrung
10 see that maiden weep.
Il pritthee, gentle shepherd, pipe,
Perchance my grief twill charm
Quoth he: I'D pipe with pleasure, but
I've no tobacco, marn!"
JUSTICE CRAPS FINE PHYSIQUE
Justice Horace Gray, of the Supreme
Count al ,x,o ,,,>N,, IoinO his OWL