The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1889-03-23
THE ARIZONA KICKER.
Sorne Peculiarities of Journalistic life in
Western Territory.

ads we should have skipped publicG-
ton entirely. When 1t is cold enough
in this town to freeze whisky within
ten feet OF red-hot stove there is no
call for an editor to get up and hump
himself. Our esteemed contemporary
down the street calculates to skip two
weeks and get drunk at least four
times, and we shall be with him in
spirit. While we aim to publish the
greatest newspaper in the West we
can't fight 27o below zero worth
shucks. Cum dig soils, which means
that as soon as the blizzard lets up we
will try to do better
The SAMOA AFFAIR.-In case of a
war count us in! We have already ar
ranged, in case war breaks out, to leave
the Kicker in good hands, or suspend
publication altogether and go to the
front. We shall go as General. We
shall be prepared to part with a liberal
quantity of our blood, devour our share
of hard tack, and return to receive the
plaudits of the multitude. Let 'er go,
Gallagher!
GONE TO THE H. II. G.-An Indian
named "He-that-thinks-a-great-deal'
drank pint of Bronson's bulge the
other evening and started for his abode
across the creek. Yesterday his dead
body was found on the highway near
the bridge, frozen so stiff that it broke
in two as the boys loaded it up. The
spirit had gone to the happy hunting
grounds, there to know sorrow never
again. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
will think no more. Had he thought
great deal more about water and
great deal less about whisky he might
have pulled through until spring and
had another chance to run off a horse,
but he had become discouraged and
wanted to go. He is gone. 1t is we'll
We traded him years subscription
to the Kicker for four big jack-rabbits,
and we are six months ahead of him.
MoLEHILL vs.. MoUNTAIN.-T is
a disposition on the part of few mud
sills to magnify the little incident
which occurred at the post-office last
Tuesday evening. Last week we re-
ferred to Colonel Crocker as thief
We were wrong. He was arrested in
Illinois for arson and jumped his bail.
He met us in the post-offlce and
knocked us down. While down we
explained that we were in error, and
he apologized and helped brush the
dirt off our clothes. That's all there
was to it-one of the trifling incidents
of everyday life-and that class who
are seeking to exaggerate the facts
will make nothing by it. When we
call an incendiary thief-a robber, an
absconder-a bigamist an embezzler,
we shall apologize every time. There
is no reason why an editor shouldn't
also be gentleman.
WELL SUPPLIED.-J. M. Tompkins,
our leading and popular druggist, has
received from the East fresh supply
of arsenic, strychnine and rough on
rats, and any one requiring any thing
in that line will find his goods fresh and
hisoprices exceedingly moderate. Mr..
Tompkins uses tho poor just as well
as the rich, and all who come are made
welcome.
In GooD TIME.-1he "Howling Hy.
ena," which boasts of a weekly circu-
lation of 125 copies, and whose jealousy
OF the Kicker's success is matter OF
public comment, sneeringly observed
last week that we had not yet secured
the right to put postmaster" after our
name. Don't be in Il hurry, gentle
men. We began on the ground floor,
and we can't grow nine stories all al
once. We don't want to be postmaster
just at present, being engaged in con-
ducting great weekly newspaper,
grocery, butcher shop, and hardware
store combined, but when we get more
time we may have something to say
about even the governorship. The only
pang of sorrow we feel is one for the
editor of the Howling Hyena, who will
have filed drunkard's grave before
our plans are perfected.
A CORRECT VERSION. = There are
several versions flying around in re-
gard to the unfortunate affair in the
Red Front Saloon last Friday night. As
We were present and witness we will
state that when Major Shamocken came
in he was inebriated. Some one laugh
ingly asked him how he escaped from
Joliet, and thn Major foolishly insisted
that his character had been impugned.
AS we owed him fifteen dollars he
did not want to harm us, but passed on
to Judge Shocks. The Judge was also
far gone with drink and in bad temper,
and the two clenched and rolled on the
floor. The stove was upset. and in it's
fall the Major was mortally injured.
This is plain statement of the case.
We all know that the Major was
horse-thief, and he shouldn't thave been
so thin-skinned. We all know the
Judge as an old bum and corrupt Off
cial. and he shouldn't have been 80
ready to fight. Both were to blame
and yet neither could be held culpable.
Detroit Free Press.
The Mosquitoes Poison Glands.
The bloodthirsty mosquito is not