Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1889-11-21

came into the house and asked:
Did you hire colored MANI
why. yes"
What for?"
L was going to have him whitewash the
vegetable cellar, take down and clean the
laundry stoyepipe and do some other odd
jobs
HIN! Mrs. Bowser, | don't believe In
encouraging such people. He'd have done
| about one hour work and charged you for
a whole day. don't believe he knows any
more about whitewashing than do about
playing the harp"
But he said Re did"
Certainly Did you ever see q negro
who wouldn't say anything to fit the occa-
sion?'
There no but about it. If there are
any little jobs about the house I've got
plenty Of time to do them. In fact. need
Just such exercise. Such works. diver
sion for me, and the doctor recommends
it"
DO you mean to say you will do the
whitewashing?
Il do. I don't do it to save dollar, but
for my own benefit. always liked the
smell of lime. =
Il wish you wouldn't do it. You'll get
lime in your eyes and you will blame me
| for it, and -"
| There you goI Blame you! What
! would blame you about? IF l get lime
in my eyes it s my own fault Mrs Bow
ser. you are getting to be good deal of
crank lately
"WeIl, if you are determined on it,
don't say that I asked you or encouraged
you"
That's funny way to talk to me, Mrs
Bowser! Are you getting ready for the in
sane asylum? ] think run my own house
yet. If | am willing to peel off and do
these jobs I ought to be encouraged in
stead of insulted."
was quite sure how it would end but
| said nothing more, and In the course of
half an hour he got into his old clothes and
went down cellar. | followed him down to
give him few last words of advice but
he didn't need them.
You go right up stairs and SIT down
and enjoy yourself" he said. Here's
this brush and here the pail of lime, and
if | don't whitewash more cellar in ten
minutes than Moses could in a day, I'll
never try it again Besides, Mrs. Bowser
/ whitewashing is not the SLOUGH work you
imagine it to be. 1t has got to be done by
a person of taste and intelligence or it
won't stand. | want little blueing to
| give it tinge."
''You understand, I said, as got what
he wanted, ''that | did not ask you to do
this work
ASK me! What on earth ails you, Mrs.
| Bowser? You are making fuss enough
over ten minutes work to warrant a
years job"
st must be well done"
Certainly"
1.-TWO coats all around.
'Just so.
Gwen if it takes me over half an hour,
which it won't I'll show you Job here
that will make black man turn green
with envy. Just run upstairs and make
yourself comfortable
| retreated up the stairs to the kitchen
door and waited for results, which | knew
were sure to come. Mr. Bowser dipped
and dished and sozzled and stirred until he
had the liquor to his liking, and as he be-
gan on the stone wall heard him chuck
ling:
II said fifteen minutes, but I'll go slow
and take twenty The idea of a colored
man sloshing around here all day to do this
work. Let's see. l believe I'll take the
overhead first. -
[ held my breath in suspense for long
minute. Then a yell arose from that Gel
lar which jumped the cook out of her old
slippers and made her cry OUT:
''For heavens sake, Mrs. Bowser, have
we beer struck by another cyclone?'
There was second and third yell, and
as hurried down stairs Mr.. Bowser stood
in the middle of the cellar, hands outstretch-
ed and jumping up and down as if he had
fire under his feet.
For Heavens sake, what is it, Mr.. Bow
ser?" [ asked.
Observation-Disclosures
"Where?"
SIN my eyes! I'm blind! I've burned
them QUIT
Il got hold of him and led him out to
the laundry tubs and set the water to run
ming. He had indeed got dose in his
eyes, but it was more painful than danger
GUS He could hardly see daylight after
we had washed out all the lime. and as
led him up stairs he said:
Il shall never see again-never see you
! or the baby again in my life!'
! washed his eyes with milk and got
him to lie down on the lounge, and in a
couple of hours he was pretty near all
right. His eyes were sore, but no great
damage had been done. He was very
gentle until he discovered this. Then he
suddenly turned on me with:
Mrs. Bowser, what possible excuse can
you urge In extenuation of your conduct? p
| ''What do you mean?"
| ''What do | mean? That's cool ques-
ton to ask me! In view of what has trans
pired what have you to say?
Il say that you were foolish to undertake
the job
Mrs. Bowser!' he shouted, squirting
tears of lime water out of his eyes, ''doy u
pretend to deny that you didn t encourage
me to undertake task which you knew
would put my whole future happiness, if
not my life, in peril!''
Il do, sir. [ did all I possibly could to
dissuade you"
And you are not to blame?'
mot In the least.
''And I brought it all on mYself?''
You did.
Mrs. Bowser, this is too much-too
muchl | could forgive one who had
wronged me, if penitent, but when they
attempt to brazen it out it is time for
action. We will settle ON the amount of
alimony right here and now.
But we didn t. After blinking around
for half a day he went down town, and
when he came home 70 supper he was as
good-natured as pie. got colored man
to come and do the work, and two or
three days later, when Mr. Bowser hap
pened down cellar, | heard him saying to
himself:
Eyes, it's mighty slick job I did on
this, and III tackle that stovepipe to-
morrow morning. Detroit Free Press.
Anguish Unspeakab1e