Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1889-11-29
FLASHES OF FUN

HARD work is the best cure Co.
blues; at least, that is what lat r .or the
ways tell other people. you al
CHAuScEY DEpEw thinks the A..
can girl has had her day in Enn i.efl,
But can't she secure Kniehtp s'aad'
WHAT'S the difference between . g.,
mountaineer and dandruff? Ono av,ss
the Alps and the other ais tho s seales
WAS there enough of the rema; ps'
found to admit of an inquest?, am,
yes! The coroner looked ont 70, ., on,
AS ADAM remarked to Eve as tho,
sat outside the garden gate: aWa, Wy
had an unusually early fall, have ' W.
not?" We
MEET me on the corner ton;to
wrote, "and dew not fale.n Ana =, ~
answered him." "There is M s sue
word as fale." en
IT is not often that a woman bos H.
head completely turned, but PASSING h.
another woman's new bonnet o;vos ~
head good twist. A'
"CLARA, that horrid Mr.. Slick 10,
just left. 1 do think he has . ,r;ns
tongue!" Il shouldn't be surprised :
know he has false teeth"
"DoN'r despair, Darringer; vou,vo
got all the world before you" aRnt
that's just the trouble, Bromley IA
feel better if I had some of it beb;na
me-"
LITTLE Dick-Do you go to circuses9
Circuses is wicked. Little Jack-Yes.
the big shows is wicked, but the ten'
cent shows amt. Pop always takes ns
to them.
KIND Soul-My husband is such a
dear creature! When I am choppinc
pile Of tirewood out in the yard, he'll
sit half q day before the fire and weep
at my having to work so hard!"
SMALL Son-Pa, what is bachelorq
Henpecked Parent-A bachelor is man
who has resisted lall endeavors on the
part of woman to render his life miser.
able through marriage"
CANTwArrE-Say, do you remember
that 1ive-dollar bill I loaned YOU?
Owen Long-Remember it, sir, never
forget favor like that. You haven't
got another one about you, have you?
Now, WHICH of the great men of the
past would you rather be. Roberto"
asked the teacher after long and inter.
esting talk on the celebrities of history
"None of EN-" replied Robert. prompt
ly. None of them! Why noty
"Cause they're all deadw
"THEY tell me you are going away
"Yes; I'm going to publish newspaper
in Kentucky" Have you purchased
your type and press and SO on?' "No
not yet; but I've just bought an elegant
Winchester rife"
V1s1ToR-You don't mean to say that
you do sewing Sundays? How can you
do such wicked thing? Lady Of the
House-Oh, but you know I always sit
at the back window. Visitor-Oh, well,
THAT'S a different thing, of course.
PAPA" she criea, quite breathlessly,
as she took off her bonnet, lis not my
dress a beauty? See the pretty figures
on it?" I've noticed said her pa, as
he smothed her tresses with his hand,
chat pretty figures seemed to be at
tached to all your dresses"
ED1rH-I wish were small orange
dealer. Alphonse-W Why should lovely
orange blossom desire to become
mere plebeian trader? Edith-Be-
cause I hear of a trust which is to be
formed with the avowed intention of
squeezing the small dealers! Alphonse
constituted himself trust.
Mrs. G1BBLEGABBLE-Doc there
is something the matter with my
tongue; it pains me badly at times, and
1 don't know what to do for it. Physi-
cian-Place little cotton pillow under
it between meals; it may he tired and
need rest. Mrs. Gibblegabble- But [
couldn't talk then. Physician-That is
why I prescribe the pillow.
He VAS Il PARENT and KNEW.
you advertised for boy"
Eyes. Do you want a place."
"Yes, sir"
Gno yo,, ,r1:ek1o
"No. sir.
DO you carve your names on desks
and benches?"
No, sir"
do you play ball during office
hours ?"
"Oh, no, sir. Neverw
I'm sorry. You won't do. I wanted
boy. and individuals who do not be-
have as have indicated are not boys.
-Ha,per's Bazn.
PLENTY OF ROOM.
New York Man-Itis all nonsense for
you Chicago folks to talk about
Worlds Far. You haven't enough