Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1889-12-28
THE ARIZONA KICKER.
Rot Much Money in Il. but Good Deal
Of Honor.


rot Much Money in II. but Good Deal
Of Honor.
We extract the following items from the
last issue of The Arizona Kicker:
ANOTHER CURVE lesire TO announce 10
the readers Of The Kicker that we have made
another cut in the price Of bar soap, and for
the next two weeks shall offer six bars for
quarter. This is one bar ahead Of anything
yet offered west Of Chicago, and, while it
brings the profits way down to zero. we ex-
pect to reap some little honor from our enter
prise The grocery which we run in connec-
ton with The Kicker Is coming rapidly to
the front, and it is only question Of a few
weeks when it viii stand at the head. Our
goods are fresh, warranted full weight, and
prices lower than anywhere else.
HE WAS CoRREcT. There was consider
able establishment exhibited by our people
the other day when the governor Of Arizona
shook hands with US in front of the post
Office, and we have noticed a considerable
change in tho demeanor Of certain people to-
wards US ever since. The governor was cor
rect We are no clam shell hidden in the
drifts, and he appreciates the fact He
knows and respects the power OF the press
He knows that great paper like The Kick
er, having behind it, but under one and the
same roof, a grocery, feed store, butcher
shop, harness shop. crockery store and gents
furnishings, must WELD q mighty influence
for good.
The people in this burg who have been
looking upon US as a one mule power had bet
ter get their eyes open.
CANE TO GRIEr.-The suit OF the Widow
Gibbs against US for breach Of promise, dam
ages $4,000. came up In court last Friday
This suit was instituted six months ago by
the court house ring, which has sought our
downfall ever since the first issue Of this pa
per. That is, they put the widow up to sue
us, and have advanced the money as it was
needed.
When the widow was put on the stand she
testified that on the night Of Feb. 81, 1887, we
asked her to marry US. She insisted that this
date was correct, and that nothing could
change her mind about 1t. We then exhibited
the records of the Jail to prove that on that
day and night. and on all next day and next
night, we were a prisoner, having, as some
of our readers may remember, departed from
the line of virtue and gone on bender. This
exhibit knocked the widow out in the first
round, and COMPOUNDED her supporters, and
we don't believe they will tackle us again
after that fashion.
As for the widow, she was only a cats
paw, and we have sent to her house a basket
Of groceries, a clothesline, a set Of cups and
saucers and sack of -four to provo that we
have no malice.
IT WILL BE VERY QuHT.-Our city cleo
hon, which takes place next Tuesday, will be
Q very quiet one, and the singular spectacle
of two tickets almost without candidates
~ ID
up Of ring candidates, we felt It our duty 10
publish, as far as we could secure it, history
of each. Our biographies included thirteen
out of the sixteen candidates, and the publi-
cation was only three days old when most OF
them were hunting other localities. They
averaged all the way from murderers down
to barn burners, and we are not likely to BIO
troubled with them again.
What is left of the two tickets Is fairly
clean and honest. We are sorry we had to
interfere, and thus place the parties in such
q queer fix, but we felt it duty we owed TO
the public.
A WASTE OF MONEY. Some person who
has grievance against The Kicker left an
internal machine ON our doorstep one night
last week. 1t was a starch box filed with
giant powder and two pounds Of bullets, and
was so arranged as to explode when the cover
was lifted We took it in and started to
open it, supposing some modest admirer had
left us box of fruit or confectionery, but
ON second thought concluded TO soak it for a
while. This action saved our life. Not only
that, but it prevented the destruction Of our
institution and probably of much surround
ing property
We have made every effort to trace tho
fiend who put up this job, but so far without
success. We realize that there are many men
in this community who banker for our life,
but we hope to disappoint them. II they
feel that they must have 1t, why not fire
buckshot into our bedroom window, ambush
us at night or pick quarrel ON the street,
This plotting to scatter our bloody frag-
ments over our large and excellent stock Of
groceries is both unkind and unreasonable.
DTD.-In this city, Oct. 2s, 1889, Pete Shu-
maker, aged 81 years, 8 months and IA days.
Pete was the individual who attacked us on
the 2Ist In front Of the postofiice with q cav
airy saber, being offended at an editorial
criticizing the policy Of the car of Russia
toward Turkey We let daylight into him
In four places, and we paid his doctor bill
and funeral expenses. He sleeps well. He is
better of. Death loves shining mark.
Eastern papers please copy.-Detroit Free
Press