Morning journal and courier., 1889-01-08
MEDITATION.

Distinguished stranges Gin the West)-That is we'll drilled squad of soldiers.
 American general-Squada Great Scott, mani That's an armyl-New York Weekly.
 Proud father (showing off his boy before company)-"My son, which would you rath- CT be, Shakespeare or Edisona" Little son (after meditation) rather be Edison" ssYes. Whyf" "'Causs he ain't dead. ."- New York Weekly.
 Her grandmother was sick that the re- port got out she was dead. A sympathetic old gentleman met the child on the street.
 "And when is your grandmother to be buried, my dear2' he asked her. "Not till she's dead, sir."-San Francisco Chronicle.
 Miss Spinster (to shoe deeler)-I see thet you have marked down some of your shoes. Shoe dealer-Yes, that line of ladies' shoes is marked down. We have marked lem all down two sizes. Now there's tidy little gaiter, 1-2, I think will just fit you. Miss Spinster bushes and buys the shoes. -Harper's Bazar.
 ssWhere's old soaka" s'He once swore to his doctor that he would only take drink when on an island. He took one on Staten Island and one on Blackwell's Island, and then he went to Bedloe's Island and had a whiskey, and so on all over the country" 'Where is he now?" "Gone to the Thou sand Islands. .'"-Town Topics. Little Johnny Hooking cautiously at the visitor) )-"Where did the chicken bite you,
 Mir. Billuss don't see any of the marks" |" Visitor-"Why, Johnny, haven't been bit ten by any chicken" Johnny" Mamma, didn't you tell papa MT. Billus was dreadful lv henpeckeda Why, mamma, how funny you look! Your face is all ."-Chicago Tribune.
 Reginald Young (who has been very at tentive during the evening)-"1 wonder; Miss
 Mabel, if you would consider me impertinent
 should ask you the old, old question: Miss
 Mabel (greatly agitated)-"Oh, Reginald!- this is so sudden-I-I-yes, will listen to you, Reginald" Reginald-"well, then, have you read Robert Elsmerep p"-Burling- | ton Free Press.
 Miss Myra is speaking to her friend, Miss
 Jeanne.
 "You are rich and are still young and at tractive, why don't you marrys" "Because I shall never marry man I can | not respect''
 "Well?"
 "Well, how could I ever respect the fool | who would marry me.''-Paris Figaro. canary belonging to family at Midland | Park, N. J., "becomes greatly excited when l the six -year-old son comes into the room, and | beats itself against the cage until released , | We have known cats and dogs to manifest a | similar feeling when the ten year old son en l tered the room. The dog would clap his tai | between his legs and make wild dash for ar | open door, while the cat would scoot upstairs and crawl under bed. They knew the boy I-Norristown Herald.
 Mrs. Winks-"Hold the baby g moment there's dear. want to put back thes. | pictures got out for Mrs. Minks to look at | Such tiresome creature as she is. She wal here nearly half an hour this afternoon, and did nothing but talk about the baby" Mir | Winks-t'Bless his little heart. So the ladie
 come and sit and admire and talk about th'
 little cherub, do theya Of course they do | they can't help loving -" Mrs. Winks- "GIacious me! It wasn't my baby she talk,
 ed about, it was her own."-Philadelphi' | Record.
 It WAS the night before the wedding and h
 was bidding her good night, and softly whis
 pered: 'To- morrow eve, my darling, we begil
 our journey as bride and bridegroom, pil grims of life together: hand in hand we vii journey adown Iife's rugged road. We shal
 want to set out with glorious equipment o
 faith and hope and courage, that neither o
 us sLall faint and fall by the wayside befor
 the journey is ended; will we not, darliDgg
 IAI-oh, yes, to be sure; only really an
 so worried about the train of my dress. I
 didn't hang one bit nice to day when I trie'
 the dress on, and I'd die with modification
 if it hung so at the wedding tomorrow. G.
 on with what you were saying, ar."-Puck