Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1889-09-14
CARAMELS AT MIDNIGHT.
The Trouble Two Pounds of Them Got a
Washington Man Into.

1t was with no small degree of trepidation
that certain Washington gentleman. of steady
habits ordinarily, betook himself homeward
from little poker party at about IL o'clock the
other night. The same thing had happened
only the week before on two occasions. and his
outraged better half had frankly declared her
intention to raise rumpus if the offense was
repeated So, feeling lin for it," so to speak,
the criminal eagerly seized the happy thought
of providing himself with an apology for his
misdeeds in the shape of two pounds of choco-
late caramels, which he bought on his way home
at candy shop that was just closing. Con fid-
ing, then, in his wife's extreme fondness for
this delicacy, he assembled his GOWN steps at
length with reasonable courage. Only when
he discovered that his latch-key was not in any
of his pockets did he feel sad once more For
II IS one thing 10 sneak into the conjugal bed
room quietly with shoes in Land and quite an
other TO confront a newly-awakened spouse at
the front door. But there was no choice pos
slble In this instance, and SO the wicked one
after yainly trying the accessible shutters, be-
gan to ring. and then to bang until Is minutes
OF such attempts had yainly passed The case
seemed desperate. and so at last he hit upon a
desperate expedient. The caramels were at
hand, and OF these he determined to expend
few In trying to arouse his wife by throwing
them against her windows in the second story
that even the rattle made by half dozen
thrown at a time failed repeatedly of result. 1t
was not until the last one had actually been ex-
pended that the sash above was opened and
well-known voice inquired If it was he. He
said II was, and his relief at gaining admittance
was scarcely less than his surprise at hearing
not a word OF reproach from the mistress Of his
bosom.
The next morning, however, saw his fate pre-
clpItaied. His small son, youth of five brief
m fnu Il,
fists full of caramels, which he had been col
lecting industriousy from the street and side
walk.
See. mamma" he said ats been rainin'
candies in the night and L picked up lot in
front of our house."
The lady examined the miraculous dainties
with surprise. Then, looking up at her hus-
band without word of Interrogation, she per-
celyed an Enthusiastically guilty look upon his
countenance.
Very extraordinary, I'm sure" he said,
hoarsely.
II should think So" she replied, a light sud-
denly dawning upon her. So the rattle on nv
windows that awakened me last night was made
by the caramels you threw?'
"1es, my dear. l thought you might like
some caramels and SO l boAght two pounds for
you"
And this is the way get them" she ex-
Claimed You stay out till all hours in the
morning with 'ot of good-for-nothing men.
drinking and gambling, suppose. and then
you come home and throw my caramels around
the street. You're brute! Boo-hoo, boo
hoor'
And she wept until he entered into formal
contract not to say out after 10 o'clock at
night for a month. with clause added guaran-
teeing her one pound of caramels per diem
during the entire thirty days. So there is peace
and harmony in that family TO- the next four
weeks, at all events. And for the candies
found In the street by the small boy he ate
them all at single go, and had such a bad
pain in consequence that it took half bottle
OF Jamaica ginger to cure Kim