The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1889-03-03
NYE AT NIAGARA.
The Great HumOrist Braves a
Big Storm.
HE INTERVIEWS POCOMOCO.
John Darn and His Buffalo French---A Great
Chief Pours Out His Tale of Woe
to Great HumOrist.

"eVIsiIed the falls on the day of the blizzar1
WHICH wrecked Reading and which wount
up Oy tipping the suspension foot bridge a
niagara into the river below. The falls hav
oeen visited in summer and in winter, in tn
broad glare of day and the soft and mellow
moonlight, but very few people have gon
there during blizzard.
The day broke moist and measly at Buffalo
CUT at noon the gray and choppy clouds scat
oered a. little and patch of sky could nov
ana then ediscovered. Eating hasty meal
our party, arrayed in alpenstocks and CON
'sCaors rectitude, began the ascent from
Buffalo by circuitous route. We reached
Niagara Falls station, whence we proceeded
oy drosky to our chalet. Here we alighted.
The chalet is kept bya native American, and
after our long journey from Buffalo it was
good to once more hear the music of our own
language. Hastily eating light lunch, we
put on our topcoats, and in charge of John
Darn we proceeded by diligence towards the
tails via the American side.
The storm now burst upon us in all its
fury, and the rain descended in the widest
profuslon, saturating the falls and rendering
them well nigh impossible. Our muleteer
covered himself with his pontoon, wrapped
his tarpaulin around his ears, and while our
slender diligence swayed in the blast he
drove US across to Goat Island. The thunder
of the immense volume of water was now
swallowed up by the mighty roar of the
bursting tempest, and then, as it died away
like the wall of a perishing soul, one would
agpin hear the sullen thunder of the great
American dam site.
We now began the descent on the side Of
Goat Island looking towards the Great Horse
Fall The rain fell in torrents, and as our
umbrellas had been turned wrong side out by
the blast we were soon wet to the skin. There
we stood in the presence of the greatest spec
'tacie America can produce perhaps, outside
of congress. Like an egotistical author Ma
CARA for centuries has been pouring over its
own works. 1t is really, however, beyond
criticism. went there thinking that if the
Falls really deserved scathing, would scath
them through the press and injure their bust
ness; but 1 must say that, like Mr.. Booth,
they deserve their great success, and do not
blame them for respecting themselves and
having their pictures taken every little while
and getting their names in the papers. They
deserve all the glory they have got, and far
be it from me to put a straw in the way of
the progress of Niagara Falls
: We next went down to the Whirlpool, and
q on tirs way detachment of John Darms es-
eorted us with an air of suspicion. Our
drosty driver evidently watched US every
moment like a cat. At the whirlpool we
aIighted again, being narrowly watched by
the driver and John Darn from Cohoes.
Here as we reached the brink of the cliff
the blizzard struck US amidship, and the
great niagara which has assisted so many
temperance lecturers in soaring to death the
moderate drinker seemed to become silent in
the presence of old Mr.. Blizzard, from the
wild and nnkempt west. Just then my high
3. sIklnat, which wear in ascending the Alps
and doing the tourist act generally, went up
into q large blue hole In the sky, and while
,sygas watching it the square red remark,
FaKeep off the grass" with an ironrod on one
side, swatted me across the organ of alimen-
tiveneSS.
The storm was now at its height The roof
of the hotel gently lifted with the breeze, and
through the fast falling rain we could see
surprised gentleman in his room just emerg-
ing through the neck band of bright new
shirt. With a look of horror and wonder he
tried TO pull down the roof again and conceal
himself, but he could not do SO.
The storm now took of its coat and
,sArieked, while the Whirlpool was dashed to
its greatest fury, and at the Whirlpool bazaar
genuine Indian moccasins, made in Connect
cat. went down to 50 pair. made move
yneut towards the brink of the precipice, in
tending to peer down over it into the boiling
waters, when felt the grasp of gendarme
On my shoulder and was jerked back with
IN cath which would have sworn in a whole
urecinct of ron-residents at a presidential
election.
monsieur fool heenlselfl" said the John
Darn in pure Buffalo French, with slight
sxafois of the Rue de Main street. Then
grinding his teeth he managed to make me
understand that had stated in Buffalo that
81 was going over the falls and through the
whirlpool" but that q nemesis was on my
trail. 1t is very disagreeable to have your
trail stepped on by q nemesis, and so l ex-
piained that | meant to be figurative, end So
when the John Darn had opened my over
coat and found that L was not dressed in
tights with double loaded bridge jumping
sIAoes, be allowed me to pass. 1t was here at
the bazaar that | met my old friend POGO
Tnoco, of the Pluto tribe of Indians. And
what are you doing here, so far away from
home, Pocomoco!" asked, in the light run
ming domestic accents of the Piute tongue.
81 am here" he replied in the same Ian
guage. ito procure our regular supply Of
Indian relics for the coming year. We can
not compete any longer with Connecticut in
the manufacture Of genuine Indian relics.
So we come to Niagara Falls for them. We
also get most of our ornamental bead work
done in England, and our ornamental mas
sacre business is done there too. The white
man has facilities which we do not have, and
so the red mans goose is practically cooked.
We buy all our weapons and headache sticks
nov at New York We get our bows and
arrows made at Waterbury, Conn, and
Boston furnishes US with our lingerie
We can buy arrow heads cheaper than
We can make them, and why should
we toll over a home made arrow