Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1889-12-04
I AND POINT.
A DISPLAY head--the drum major.

n SPLAH 0eAO--the uIuIl uAAJux.
THE silver question-.solid or plated?
PRISON fare might be called checker
board.
MANY an old fame has caused = RIM
away match.
THE individual who dispises o man
who wears q ragged coat Is the tailor
whom he owes for it.
THE accomplishment of = difficult
feat sometimes puts q professional
gvmnast OF his feet.
FlRsr Thief-How is your baby get
ting along? Second thief-First rate!
He has got so he reaches out for things
already.
l HAVE made q conquest said the
brick wall, "How So" queried the
stone pavement. AN egg was mashed
on me to-day"
Il n you don't like. Mr.. Chasu-
BILE. I think that man carries the odor
OF sanctity about with him. Perhaps
so; bnt he must keep it corked up very
tight"
Vic KwIRE-What makes You keep
that light burning in broad day light,
Finklestein? You don't need ii. Fink.
lestein No, We tondt need it, but ve
pays for it by der mondt.
WIFE-How do you like the medi-
cine the doctor left for you? Husband
First rate, There is an unmistable
taste Of whisk-- / mean, I guess it will
bring me around all right.
JoNEs-l say, Robinson, You ought
to go as q missionary to some Of the
cannibal islands. Robinson--Why 30?
Jones Because you are 80 crusty that
the natives wouldn't eat You. I
"WHAr are you doing now, Gusf"
said one young man about town to
another. -Oh, / write for a living"
"On the daily press?" "No; l write to
father about twice q month for a remit.
tance.
NEW aoor-walker ~(recently captain Of
hose company)-Wbat would You like
to look at. Madam? Customer
would like to look at some hose. Here,
boy, conduct the lady to the fire de-
partment.'
"JoE, You were up with Miss Jankins
until IL o'clock last night" "Yes. l
was trying to outsit another fellow"
ooh, that vas it, Ell? I've been there
myself. Who was the other fellow"
"Her father"
A SENTIMENTAL Hibernian kicked his
wife down stairs, when he was decid-
edly how-came-you-so, and then tried
to coax her into forgiving him by salut-
ing her thus: Impress of my sole, /
az yonr pardon!"
YouNG bird ton atree)-There comes
a hunter. We'd better fly away. Old
bird-"No hurry. Hes got to climb
a fence before he gets to us, and his gun
will probably catch in a rail and shoot
him. They most always do.
JUDGE--Do you know the prisoner,
Mr. Jones? Jopes-Yes, to the bone.
Judge What's his character? Jones
Didn't know he had any. Judge
Does he live near you? Jones-So
near that ] know he has spent less than
Is for fiyewood in eight years.
"No, GEORGE" she muttered, rs the
miserable youth knelt in a passionate
frenzy ut her feet, II can never be
yours" WELL, Clara" he answered
bitterly, as he rose quickly, "you might
at least have told me SO before, and
saved me from bagging these trousers"
Ex-wIDow Ito new husband oh,
how / wish poor John could see us now
how happy it would make him. New
husband--Eh, what's that? Ex-widow
-You know, dear, John always used to
q that he hoped I'd get better one
in his place il he w went off the
hooks.
My hands are awfully cold," said tho
pretty girl suggestiyely on the last
quarter of q starlit sleighride. why
didn't you bring o muf with your"
asked the practical young man prosa.
ically. II did" she snapped, but she
wouldn't explain where the muf had
gone to, and he has been wondering
ever since just what she meant.