Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-06-21
RESTAURANT PHYsioeNoMY.
One Of the Profession Tells About Ass
wAfter~ Are Made Miserable.

ooe of the Profe..ion Tells About Asv
Waiter. Are Made Miserable.
In the quiet hour just after the noon rush
the obs@rvant hasher leaned over the lunch
counter and thoughtfully surveyed the broad
cloth coaftails Of tall. slender gentleman
who was just melting into the crowd Of work
men, merchants, lawyers and other busy
uaortals nurrying back to their various en-
pioyments, and remarked:
There Is the quietest. most gentlemAniy
kicker that ever saw in my Life
~Whyf7 laconically remarked the clerk,
who was eating a plate OF doughnuts, pro-
fessionally known as life preserversT at .
seat by the counter.
well. you sse that new waiter over there
brought him potatoes and cream for bananas
and cream. and rather than hurt the mans
feelings by mentioning the mistake, be called
me over there, aud, putting his hand To bis
mouth, whispered in my ear:
"'Sorry to trouble you, but | don't think
these are bananas that the other gentleman
brought me Beg your pardon, you know,
but # YOU could change them without us
noticing, | should be very much obliged
You bet changed them for him and got
this - and he bit a fifty cent piece TO see If 1t
was good.
Its funny continued the observant
youth, "the difference there is in men. Now,
you see that fat, jolly fellow over there at
the side table eating lobster and laughing
over funny story he has just told He keeps
shoe store up here and sells goods through
sheer good nature, but N truth he's a brute.
He looks like a good fellow who would be
easy to please, don't her
The listener admitted that said party Of
the first part looked quite amiable, and the
hasher replied:
WELL he amt That man would kick if
he was going 10 be hung, he would, He comes
here every day for dinner, and he usually sits
at my table, because | am about the only
waiter there is here who hasn't refused to
wait on him. He CONES in with putting and
blowing that would do credit To a sewer en-
CINE and wells TO nie before he is seated. He
wants a glass Of water first and drinks it at
one gulp and then sets down the glass and
says: Bah why don't you have some water
that's fit to drink He kicks because there
are crumbs on the cloth, swesrs because the
napkins are damp, snarls at every dish as il
is set down, aud fairly bowls over what be
terms the 'ungodly size of tine bill He
throws the dishes around rattles the silver,
Slabs viciously at the food and pounds on his
plate with a knife II he wants anything. He
ends by kicking to the cashier and saying I'm
complimentary things about the cigar be
buys at the desk.
1t was hard to believe all this about SC
pleasant faced a man. but the waiter was
very positive about it, and having settled
that point, sized up tall, thin man, who
had just come in, and began TO give mouth
sketch OF hn. DO you notice how mean he
looksf' said he. Just catch on TO that long
mulish hpof his, will youi You would think he
was mean enough u sell his share in a treat
wouldn't youi He isn't though. He is 9
good fellow, and is satisfied with everything
never knew him to kick but once, He will
saw away at bootleg steak, or wrestlt
with a refractory crust of stale bread without
even indulging in the usual facetious remark.
about chloroform and buzz saws, He newell
shivers in an exaggerated and unnatura
manner if his coffee isn't hot enough To bol
eggs. He eats what he orders-if he can
ami PAYS for it without murmur. The on
crying need OF our profession is more mel
like that; but even he had TO say something
once. He had ordered mince pie, and thu
first piece of il he put in his mouth containet
half inch section of hoop iron, which b.
didn't seem to appreciate, but even then h
| didn't say much He called me over, pointet
TO the hardware and said he had conclude,
to adopt lighter diet and would like plat
of sponge cake st. Paul Globe