The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-12-05
BRIGHT BITS.

He-You don't want to walk on roses bare
Iooote1. DO you; You'd get thorns in your
feet-Ieros SfftiHys.
aR. NEELYrIEDI can see that baby will be a
great society leader when he growsup.
MIS- NeWlyfied (delighted)-O, do you? Why :
Mr.. Newlytied-He gives bawl every night
Toledo Blade
SUNDAY School TEACHER Observation-Disclosures
do you know what day this is?
street Urchin-Hi. felers, Here's cove as
don't know what day this is. Guess he's been
out all night.-Boys and Girls.
HOSPITAL PHYSICIAN with view to diagnosis,
What do you drink?
New Patient Cheering up at the proposal
.. sIr-thank you, sir-whatever you'll leave
that TO you sir l-LOndon Punch.
Hell assure you that we young lawyers have
a hard time of it. Do you see that old codger
over thereI We are tired Of waiting for him TO
die.
She-But that is my father.-Bosto7l BUDGET.
A DANGEROUS SYMpTox-She-I am feeling
very bad. Something fickers before my eyes
all the time
He-Great Christopher Columbus. she is
mining Tor another diamond ring.-Teras Sift-
tngs
call, James? -0
James "a recent acquisition, but determined
10 emulate culture)-Yes, madam, Mrs Fair
CHIC and the Misses Fairchildren.-Ne 70 rk
Sum-
TAILOR calling on doctor)-Here is this bill
of Sc that have called on you half dozen
times about, and this is my last visit. sir
Doctor-That's right, sir. l charge 81 a visit
and wen now call it square.-CIothier and
FStrntsher.
A FARM JOURNAL asks: ''why do the young
rush 70 the towns and cities?" The answer is
easy enough. It is because they are anxious to
get there. And the fact that there are no farms
in the city may have something to do with it.
-Ne1 York Ledger.
ToMMY-Paw, what is the difference between
politician and statesman
Mr.. Figg-A heap. While mans alive and
IN other peoples way, he is politician After
he has been dead thirty or forty years he be-
comes statesman.-Terre Hautte Express
LOOK here said the credit man, 1--WE can't
sell you those goods on four months time"
Wy not, gives you my note1"
But do your notes sell on the street?'
Mine gracious. no; or ! would go home and
make notes instead Of cloding. Shoe and
Leather Exporter.
DR.. LoSe1How did you enjoy my sermon
to-day, Mr.. Knapp?
Mr. Knapp Excellent. doctor; the only
trouble was il was too short.
Dr. Long (surpTised)-Too short?
MIR. Knapp-Yes. / didn't get my sleep half
out.-Mulseys Weekly.
CLARA TAT breakfast tablet don't think
there is much, if any, difference between
Observation-Disclosures and reverie; perhaps the
latter is q more dreamy condition Now last
night, for instance, when George was here
dropped into reyerie, and seemed to have
gone miles and miles into drearnland before
Tommy Qnterrupting)- bet there was
only one lap to the mile.-Richmond Dispatch.
Mrs. SowDERs-Mrs. Jones told me this after
noon that burglars broke into the church last
night and took everything they could lay their
hands upon.
Rev. Snowden (somewhat absent-minded)-
Did they take a collection Kearney Enter
prise.
SHE-Before we were married you promised
that my path through life should've strewn with
roses; and now have to sit up at nights and
darn stockings.
SEWING MACHINE AGENT-Good morning,
reverend sir. You know something, do you
not, of a society in this place known as the
Tattle Town Sewing Circle!
Reverend do. young man, do.
Sewing Machine Agent-Then you can tell
me, no doubt, what kind OF sewing they particu
larry devote themselves to?
Reverend regret to say. my friend. that
they devote themselves most assiduously to
sowing the seeds of scandal.-Richnl Dis.
patch.