The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1889-05-04
Mugwumps as They Appear to the Rev.
John Riley Thompson.
New York Sun.

The Rev. John Riley Thompson of
the Washington Square Methodist
Church says that Mugwumps re-
mind him of the men who get up at
church prayer meetings and make
louder professions than anyone else.
When you've been Methodist
preacher as long as l have" he says,
., gu will know enough to steer shy
ct them"
AT the Lincoln Club dinner in
Jersey City Tuesday night, Mr..
Thompson told the following story
by way of warning to any Mug
wumps who might be present:
This is true story" he said.
One night, at one of the prayer
meetings, a good brother got up and
said: We'll, brethren and sisters,
to me the sky is clear, the ocean is
smooth, and gentle breeze is blow
ing. | never was so happy before in
my life, and feel that am going
to heaven at the rate of six knots
an hour Then he sat down, amid
a chorus of amens. There was ST.
lence for moment, and another
good brother got up and said: Il
feel like shouting glory all the time.
To me the sky is clear, too, and the
sea is smooth. A stiff breeze is
blowing and l am going to heaven
at the rate Of ten knots an hour
Then he sat down amid amens. An
other brother got up and said:
Heaven he praised, brethren. The
sky is opening to me, and the way is
clear. Many ships arc in sight, but
there is clear passage for me, A
gale is blowing, and l am sailing to
heaven at the rate of fifteen knots
an hour.' He sat down and there
were more amens. Then fourth
brother got up and said: The
brethren who have spoken are going
fast but feel as though / was go
ing even faster. The sky is all clear,
the sun is shining, and the waters
are not ruffled; vet a cyclone of
glory is blowing me on to heaven at
The rate Of twenty knots an hour.
The amens could be heard a block
away. Then followed dead silence.
Finally a little old woman, who bad
been sitting quietly in corner, got
up and said: Well, brethren,
don't want to discourage you. I'm
glad you're getting along so fast.
As for me, I've had my troubles and
my trials. I've had my good times
and my bad times, and my joys and
my sorrows, and I'm not all through
with them yet. I'm on the right
path, though, and the Lord has got
my hand. A good many people ain t
travelling my way. | may not be
going rs fast as some of you are, hut
feel that I'm getting there. Before
sit down, though. want to tell
those brothers who are getting along
50 fast that IL they don't look out
they'l II bust their b'ilers and won't
git there at alb Strange to say"
continued Mr. Thompson, as his au-
dience roared with laughter. there
wasn't an amen when the old lady
sat down. But just want to say
to the Mugwumps:
Gentlemen, you're getting ahead
OF your party at lively gait. and If
yon don't look out you'll bust your
hile.s.' This country, SO long as
human naiure is ms il is, cannot he
governed by angels, and when the
Magwninl's get 80 good and so pure
and ~ far IN advance or their party
tlait II takes telescope to see them,
their use on this earth is at-an end,
aud the sooner wings ar, clapped on
their shoulders and they are trans
ported to the realms above the better
for all mankind