Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1889-03-27
Henry w. Paine.

ANECDOTES SHOWING HIS WIT AND HIS WONDER
Full MEMORY.
From the Lewiston (Me.) journal. March 9
The writer heard one day this week some
new stories about that wonderful man. Henry
W. Paine, whose acute sayings are numbered
among the worlds best epigrams. The narrator
was once pupil of Paine's in the Boston uni
versity law school, where Paine lectured on
real property.
'One day." said this gentleman. ''Mr Paine
made this remarkable statement to me: Il was
born on the bank of the Kennebec river and
grew up there; yet never went in swimming,
put on skate, played game of cards, or bor-
rowed dollar"
will leave it to my readers who are ac-
qualnted with the customs of Kennebeckers to
decide which of these four specifications of alb
stinence is the more remarkable.
Il Will tell you an incident" said this gen.
tleman, Ito illustrate the wonderful power of
Paine's memory when he was in his prime.
They were exhibited almost daily. but never
more conspicuously or dramatically than in
this case.
I'm 1879 he visited England, and with party
of ladies and gentlemen, went to Windsor
Castle. Although Paine had never been there
before, he seemed to be perfectly acquainted
with all the objects of interest on the road and
III the vicinity which he pointed out to his
friends with copiOus comments. One of the
buildings - which he called their attention
was a house which he said once belonged to
Lord Coke, the great English jurist.
Beg your pardon. sir said an Englishman
standing by. who overheard; Lord Coke never
lived there
81 think / am right said Paine quietly.
If my memory serves me. Lord Coke acquired
that house by his marriage with his second
wife, Ann Hatton'
You're wrong. SIR persisted the English
man. I'm member of Lord Coke's profess
sion, and know
''.Well, we won't dispute it further said
Paine. pleasantly. We probably agree as well
as two lawyers ever do.
Nothing more was said but the next dav as
Paine was walking on the Strand in London.
whom should he meet but this gentleman! The
latter took off his hat on seeing him. handed
him his card. and said: I wish to beg your par
don, sir. Lord Coke did live in that house
You We're right and | was wrong
This was the beginning of an agreeable &C
| quaintance.
Il remember riding home in horse car with
Paine one day." continued this gentleman,
| Paine was reading a sheepskin-bound volume
of law reports. A mutual acquaintance called
him and said: See here, Paine, do you have to
study law still?'
"'Ths isn't law said Paine It's only a col.
| lection OF decisions of the Massachusetts SUI
| preme court
1.-THE great lawyer" the gentleman went on
'once quoted some singularly beautiful and APP
proprlate verses i'll an impromptu tribute to the
memory of a distinguished tourist. the spon-
! taneous eloquence of which kept his hearers
| spell-bound. Somebody asked him where he
| found those lines
! I only know said he. that my father re-
| peated them to me over sixty years ago, when
was lad. never have seen or heard then
SINCE"
Paine inherited his waggish spirit from his
father, who was an inveterate JOKER
| One day Waterville citizen, noted for hi
misery character, asked Paine the elder tC
write an epitaph to be placed Oh his grave
stone after he should have gone. Paine agreed
to do it, and sent the following:
| .h Heaven be pleased when sinners cease to sin,
| II hell be pleased when sinners enter in,
| II earth be pleased when dies the arrant knaye
| Then all were pleased when John Jnks filled thi
| gravel"