Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1889-12-20
WOMAN AND HOME.
USEFUL INFORMATION FOR MOTH
ERS AND HOUSEKeEPERS.
The secrets of the Toiiet-Heroic Mothers
of Continental Students-what Most
Women Rehabilitation Harlan's
Views on Love and Friendship
Woman Journalist.

The most important function of an agree
able hostess begins after her guests are as
senbled. She must endeavor to see that all
are happy and amused, she must try to pre-
vent deadlocks, and to promote n certain
amount of circulation among the company,
and at the same time she must not seem busy
or meddliug, or interfere too much with in
divdual liberty. In other words she must
steer nice course between individualism on
the one hand and Capitalization on the other
] think the modern theory of hospitality
tends very much toward individualism d. G.,
allowing people to do as they please tempered
by certain amount Of introductions.
A clever woman once described to me with
amusement, not unmixed with contempt, the
conduct of young hostess at a fashionable
watering place This young married woman
(who was old enough and experienced enough
10 have known better ''pranced up and down
her own piazza, first with one gentleman and
then with another, leaving the rest of her
guests to amuse themselves us they best
couldm
1t is even worse however, to interfere too
Hnuch with ones guests because most people
Sc inclined to resent anything that APP
Sroaches social dictation. Thus a clever and
agreeable hostess Of X has given great
otfense to her guests by requesting them to
change places in the middle of dinner party
and by disturbing conversations and break
ing up tetea-tetes in an arbitrary and high
handed way The mistress OF the house must
sometimes break up conversations, where she
has reason to suppose that either of the con-
versers is becoming weary, or whore she
wishes to introduce them to other persons,
but this power needs to be exercised with
great discretion, and ii the guests intimate
preference for remaining as they are, the
point should be yielded gracefully and at
once.
1t has been said above that an agreeable
hostess always enjoys or endeavors to enjoy,
her own entertainments | hope that few la
dies are maladroit as a debutante, who said
not long ago, to guest at an afternoon tea,
Afternoon teas are horrid, aren't they: So
stupid and tiresOmc. Don't feel obliged to
stay, just because it's my coming out party.'
1t may seem strange thata young lady should
make such very thouGhtle>, and i'll bred
speech-but young people who have no; be-
come accustomed to the ways OF the world
sometimes make these mistakes from desire
to be frank
One of the secrets of entertaining agreea-
by is TO dose often, for habit gives ease in
this, rs in other matters.
Another very important point is that of
treating all the guests alike, as far as it is
possible to do 50, Of welcoming them all with
cordinlity, and endeavoling to see that all
have a pleasant time
have heard an elderly lady severely criti-
csed for rushing across her parlor, lowtow-
ing and bowling. and receiving with the great
est empressement an ugly old woman, simply
because she happened to he Il countess" AS
the other guests had been received without
any such display of joyful humility, they felt
somewhat jealous Of their noble rival, rightly
arguing that Americans, who have no titles,
and do not believe in distinctions of rank,
ought to behave in "A more consistent and
democratic manner.
1t is to be feared that our people sometimes
make themselves quite ridiculous by this
wide difference between their theory and
practice, and by the exaggerated care and
pains which they take to bestow their full
titles on members of the nobility AS in Eng
land these tides are not used on ordinary oc-
casons, save by interiors when they address
their superiors, it will be seen that Ameii-
cans place themselves in a false position by
such conduct. OF course do not wish to
appear discourteous or aggressive, but we
best respect others when remembering our
own self respect. Thus it seems to me UNI
American to introduce a Russian prince as
''his highnsss, Prince 'CutazoT Hedzof =
the designation prince" alone should he suffl-
cent.
There are certain guests upon whom a
hostess should bestow more attention than
she is at liberty to devote to all. Thus a
stranger, a new conner, or a very ditlident
person needs special consideration at the
hands of his hostess-whiIe the belle of the
season, surrounded by admirers, can usually
be trusted to take care of hersclf.-FlorenCe
Howe Hall in Ladies' Home journal.