Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1889-10-31
MT. Crabbe'S Burglar.

Two maiden ladies occupy the front
parlor of our clearinghouse, and Mr..
Crabbe, an exceedingly crusty old
bachelor, the back parlor adjoining
We never knew whether it was his
name that made him so grabbed, or
whether his natural disposition had
given him his name. Between him
and the Misses Brown, the said maiden
ladies, war ragged almost without cessa-
tion-iill recently.
Mr.. Crabbe owns an uncommonly
vicious parrot, which generally has
the freedom of its owners room, and
the ladies have a very large Maltese
cat, which they claim is far more in
lelligent than the average man. Sum-
mer DAYS Jack, the parrot, sits in the
open transom over Mr.. Crabbe's door
and abuses the big cat, who is rendered
almost delirious by his inability to
climb the door casing, which Mr..
Crabbe has carefully covered with
zinc, and annihilatc his enemy.
Harry Clark and Dick Allison, two
bright, manly young fellows, also room
in the house. They are the life of the
place, running over with fun and ac-
tivity. We all take our meals in the
next house, and at table such CONVERSE
tons as these have been frequent
From Miss Priscilla Brown:
"Good morning, Mr.. Crabbe. hope
that abominable bird of yours talked
itself hoarse yesterday"
"Thank you madam; / am happy to
say that Jack seems in uncommon good
health and spirits, though think the
fact is remarkable, considering the
way that vicious cat of yours worries
him"
"Vicious, indeedl" This from Miss
Abigail. 81 assure you, sir, that
Sampson has always been noted for his
quiet disposition aud gentle Manners"
"Yes'm, he seemed quiet that day
when he clawed the paint all off my
door trying to get at poor Jackl l
guess the zinc I've put on will fix his
nails" chuckling.
"Indeed, Mr.. Crabbe-" begins Miss
Priscilla, with dignity. The sisters
usually take turns in attacking the en-
envy, but about this time Harry Clark
interrupts the beligerents and adroitly
turns the conversation.
Now it happened that the Misses
Brown were MORALLY afraid of bur-
glars, and ON the hottest night the
transom over their door was kept
tightly closed. Mr.. Crabbe, on the
contrary, as in duty bound, if only
that he might oppose his neighbors,
professed the utmost fearlessness as
regarded burglars, limiting darkly as to
what might happen should he be mo-
Tested,
81 hope, sir" said Harry Clark,
"that you wouldn't shoot; we don't
want murder in the house."
ono. ! shouldn't shoot"
"Might one inquire what you would
do then?" asked Dick Allison.
"No, sir, one mightn't' replied the
old gentleman testify. off you hap
pened to be the burglar, you'd find
out"
A conversation like this seemed to
take place every few days.
One day Dick said to Harry
.Let's get up joke on old Crabbe.
He's Dragged so much about not being
afraid of burglars; let's scare him and
see what he will do in an emergency"
So the two put their heads together,
and shortly evolved dummy, sur
mounted by a very black negro mask
and an uncommonly woody wig.
"Wonder what he'll do when that
phiz appears over his doorway" said
young Allison.
1t was an uncommonly hot July
night; everybody but the Misses Brown
slept with transoms and windows wide
open, Mr.. Crabbe included.
About one o'clock the two young
men stole softly down the stairway,
bearing between them the combination
that was to scare Mr.. Crabbe. They
made their descent noiselessly, with no
trouble, as light always burned in
the hall, and they were barefooted.
Nobody has very clear idea of just
what happened after the conspirators
reached the door and placed the dummy
in position. 1t seems, however, that
the old gentleman, who is light sleep
er, was awakened by a slight noise,
and starting up, he saw the head of a
negro appearing in the open transom.
out of bed he noiselessly climb
ed upon table near the door which,
occupying little recess, was not visi-
BILE until the head and shoulders of the
intruder had entered. Upon that ta-