Wichita eagle., 1889-03-14
A BRAKEMAN'S CHAT.
Some Of the Queer People He
Meets Almost Daily.
How He Classics the Various CONNER.
cial Missionaries-The Young Tough
from Waybaek-A Nervous
Woman's Daring Jump.
Fundamentals Sentinel.i

indianapolis Sentinel.l
"Life on railroad train is rapid, vet IL
is dull" said Big Four passenger brake
man. "When fellow goes spinning over
the country thirty and forty and fifty
miles an hour he can't help feeling the
blood surge through his veins. and that is
the excitement of it; but when he spends
hour after hour on the train, and, except
when calling stations, he is silent as the
tomb, then he feels it is dull. Funny
things sometimes happen, but after going
through with the conductor and seeing
the queer encounters he has with cranks
on board for about two days fellow
gets tired and almost wishes the conduc-
tor would get into fight just to stir things
up"
"a good many queer people travel on
each train. suppose"
"Y ou'd be surprised to see them. Why,
some times the quiet passenger who takes
every thing as a matter of course, who
does not carry valise, and always has
his ticket ready, and never annoys
any one, and who gets up to give
the woman his seattle is just curl.
osity by reason of the contrast. There's
the green boy from the slashes; he
never rode on the train before, and he
doesn't know enough to keep the flies from
crawling down his throat. His thick
curled lips stand apart like the jaws of a
hippopotamus in the circus pictures-a
heap worse than they do when you look at
the brute in the cage. His sister is as
green as he is, and SO bashful and SO full
of herself that she thinks all the world is
looking at her. Her father wears the
frown which he has acquired in training
his wife to live with him without asking
him for money enough to get her good
calico dress. He always has a quarrel
with the conductor, and ends by handing
out more cash to pay fare for the son. The
mother, tired and worn out, with her baby
in her arms, appears to have carried the
burdens of the wor Id on her shoulders SO
long that she can not afford the luxury of
sitting down quietly and enjoying the
ride, but must continue to be anxious lest
some accident happens.
Eyes, Pve seen all of them many a time.
There are the commercial travellers, and
you can generally tell their various lines
crisp, practical, able and willing to stand
up for his rights; would like to have
whole seat, but won't quarrel about it.
The dry goods salesman is languid; trav-
els as if he were the Gear of Russia; tries
to look like a martyr while riding. and
yet really enjoys it; smokes good cigars;
sometimes draws bottle from a valise,
and does not care who knows it; can tell
joke in any company, and would feel at
home in Irritation. The drug drummer
is queer fellow; 50 nice and neat, and
cigarette; has way Of dressing that sug-
gets calico dressing-gown and slippers;
recognizes in the conductor q nee
essary evil; always has his thousand
mile ticket in the last valise he looks in to,
yet is very pleasant man with very
pleasant weaknesses. The grocery sales
man is another man. He always acts as
if he owned controlling interest in the
road and was thinking of purchasing the
whole train. He is not averse to telling
the conductor he is wrong, and is in error;
would be ready to aid you with his sug-
gestions and clinch his friendship by
passing his favorite cigars around. He
drinks, smokes, chews, reads all the pa
pers, buys books, makes calcula tions and
carries on just as though he did not know
anybody was around but himself"
"Funny people when you look at them
that way"
times. One time, l remember, we took
aboard an old woman at Shelbyville. She
wanted to go to Adams, and after the sec
ond stop she began to annoy me about it;
wanted to know if we'd be sure to stop;
and finally got tired and went to the
other end of the car. 1t was getting dark,
and the old woman peered out of the win
dow. We were then going at least thirty
miles an hour, and all at once the old lady
rushed to the rear platform of the car. I
started to bring her back, but 1 hope to
die if she didn't jump off just as I
was going to take hold of her. AS
soon as she struck the bed of the road she
came rolling along after the train, turning
back somersaults faster than the wheels
turned. saw her roll over, l guess, about
two hundred and fifty times, and then we
were away ahead in the darkness. "She's
dead" was my thought, but I pulled tho
bell cord, and in couple of minutes the
train came to a stand still. The conductor,
who had been in the front car, jumped of
and hurried back to ask me what was the
matter. told bin, and we began back
ing down slowly. After backing for over
half mile, we were astounded to see the
old woman walking toward Us, not
hurt bit, but mad as hornet. She shook
her fist at me and said should be reported,
and she'd sue the road for damages, and
see that her boy gave me the neatest
thrashing ever brakeman got You see,
when the train whistled she thought IL
was for Adams, and when she peer ed out
of the window she thought she saw the
town, and we didn't % can to let her off.
Well. was so downright glad she hadn't
been killed l Just took her abuse till we
pulled up at Adams, and never spoke q
word till she stepped off. when l said, in
my sweetest tones: Goodbye, auntie
Stick to the train next time
"There goes my train, and Pii see you
again"
The.Dog Paid for HIS Neal
A lady was visiting friends at the sea-
side, where there was fine dog, whose