The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1889-02-16
MISS JONES' QUILTING.
BY JOSIAH ALIENS WIFI.

Our minister was married year ago,
and we hev been piecing him a bed
quilt and last week we quilted 1t. !
always make pint OF going to quilt
ings, for you can't be back-bited to
your face, that's moral sercenty. l
know wimmen just like a book, for l
hev been one a good while. l always
stand up for my own sect, still l know
sertin effects to follew sertin causes, to
wit, namely, if two bricks are sot up
side by side, if one tumbles over on to
the other one, the other one can't
stand, it amt natur. If topper holds
a glass OF Ticker to his mouth, he can't
help swalIerin', it amt natur. If a young
man goes slay-riding with a pretty
young girl, and the buffalo robe slips
off, he can't help holdin' it around her,
it amt natur. might 20 on illustra-
tin, but enuff; quiltin' just sets women
to slanderin' as easy and beautiful as
you see. So l went. There
wasn't anybody there when I got there.
For reason, l always 60 early.
/ hadn't been there long before Miss
Deacon Graves came, and then the
Tubbs, and then Squire Ed
wardses wife and Maggie Snow, and
then the Dobbs girls 1--WE call 'em girls.
though it would be jest as proper to
call mutton lamb, for forty summers
have gilded their heads if one has gilt
'em). They we're the last come, for
Miss Browns baby had the mumps, and
otherwise couldn't leave and the Rip
leys had unexpected company. But
with Miss Jones, where the quiltin'
party was held, and her girls, Mary
Anne and Alzina, we made as many as
could set round the quilt comfortable.
The quilt was made OF different kinds
Of calico all the wimmen round had
pieced block or two, and we took up
a kollection to get the batten and linin'
and the cloth to set it together with,
which was turkey red, and come to
quilt it it looked weell; we quilted it
herrin'-bone, and running vine around
the border. After the pothmaster was
the school mistress tore to
pieces, the party to Ripleys scandelized,
Miss Browns baby voted an unques-
tionable idiot, and the rest Of the un-
neighborhood delt with,
Dobbs spoke up, and sez she :
II hope the minister will like the
bed-quilt." (Lucinder is the one that
studies mathematics to discipline her
mind and has the Roman nose.)
"It amt noways likely he WILL" sez
her sister Ophella (she is the one that
has her hair frizzled on top and wears
spectacles), 1t amt noways likely he
will, he Is a cold man, a stone statute.
Now, you see, set my eyes by the
minister he is always doin' good to
somebody, besides preachin' more like
a angel than human being. 1 can't
never forget, nor don't want to, how
he took hold of my hand, and how his
voice trembled and the tears stood in
his eyes, when my little Joe died pretty
little lamb, he was in his infant class,
and he loved him you see such things
cut deep, and there is some lires you
can't rub out, if you try ever so hard.
And l wasn't goin' to see him run
down ; you see it riled up the old Smith
blood, and when that is riled Josiah
says he always takes his hat and leaves
till it settles. And 1 spoke up, and
sez l:
"Lucky for him he was made oi
stone before he was married, for COM
mon flesh and blood" sez l, "would
have gin out a hundred times, chaste
round by the girls as he vas" (You
see it was the town talk how Ophelis
acted before he was married, and she
almost went into a decline, and took
heaps of motherwort and tetty).
al don't know what you mean, Miss
Allen," sez she, turning red as brick
i" | never heard of his bein' chaste !
know | never could bear the sight oi
him."
"The distant sight," sez Mary Ann
Jones.
Ophelia looked so mad at that that
don't know but she would have pricked
her with her quiltin' needle if old Miss
Graves hadn't spoke up. She is fat
old lady with double chin, "mild and
lovely" as Mount Vernon's sister. She
always agrees with everybody; Thomas
Jefferson, Josiah's boy by his first wife,
calls her Woolen Aprons" for one
day he sez he heard her say to a neigh
Dor, IL don't like wooden aprons, dc
you1" "Why, yes, Miss Graves,
do" "Wall, so do l." But good old
soul, if we wus all such peacemakers as
she IS, we should be pretty sure ot
heaven, though Thomas J. said that il
Satan should ask her to 60 the other
way, she would 60 rather than hurt his
feelings; l jest told him to shet up his
weekedness, and he shet up.
As l said, she looked mildly up ovel
her spectacles and nodded her purple
cap ribbons two or three times, and
said, eyes, jest So" to both Of US, and
then she was so afraid that we wouldn't
think she was jinein' with both of US
sez she, Yes, Miss Allen," Jest SO
Ophelia." And then to change the
subject, sez she, Has the minister:
wife got home yet1"
al think not" said Maggie Snow
1 was to the village day before yester,
day, and she had not come then"
al suppose her mother is we'll off,