The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1889-10-05
A W0MaN OF EXpEDIENTS.
Everything in2'

"Well, good-by, thenl I'll be back on
Wednesday. l hope you and Myrtle
won't be nervous"
"Oh, mol" replied Mrs. Pierce. Gwen
fasten all the doors and windows se-
curely."
She was little, wiry, energetic, brown
skinned woman of about 3d. She had
swapping black eyes, good deal of gold
filling in her teeth, and was evidently
possessed of the most complete self con-
fidence.
"But the kitchen window won't fasten,
Miranda. What is worse, it won't even
close. pushed it up this evening, to
throw a lump of coal after that dog of
Bruce's, that was in our back yard, and
it stuck fast. l tugged my best, but
couldn't get it down. We will have a
carpenter fix it. Be sure you send for
one tomorrow. But to-night"----
"Now don't you worry, Dave" adj
vised Mrs. Pierce, briskly. "I'll fix that
window. You know am woman of
expedients."
"Well, good-by, Miranda~
He bobbed his sandy head and gave
leT lne bilels DuSlileSo llhe hlSS WlliCll
expresses about as much affection as a
dig in the ribs.
"Good-by, Myrtle!'
"Good-by, pal' said Myrtle.
She was an angular child Of 10, with a
pale, hatchet face, a pair of round, wa
terry blue eyes, and an air of alert timid.
ity.
"And now" said Mrs. Pierce, bristling
with expedients, "we will see to that
window"
She was locking the door after her liegt
lord.
GLOW, ma?'
"Come and helpl" was the terse and
indirect reply.
The house was frame dwelling, which
stood in the meager grounds allotted tC
the majority of even those city houses
which are not rigidly "blocked."
The kitchen window looked out on {
narrow strip of back yard, which rar
directly to the alley in the rear.
Mrs. Pierce lii the gas, revealing myr
lads of water bugs scuttling around tn,
room.
ooh, ma"
"Well?"
| She was exerting all her strength t.
put down the perverse window.
"Tm so afraid of tie bugs. Let's g
| upstairs!"
"It's burglars, not bugs, you'll have t.
be afraid of if we don't get this window
fixed" gasped Mrs. Pierce with grim EN-
phasis, as she realized her efforts to per
suade the obdurate frame were futile, a
her husbands had been.
"We1l have to go down stairs am
bring up a couple of washtubs," sh
added.
Her particular ability was beginnin
to exhibit itself.
When they had brought the tubs ur
stairs and placed them before the win
dow they filed them from the kitche
faucet
Between them she placed chair, an
thereon balanced frying pans, brea
pans, gom pans, jelly cake pans and pi
pans.
Then she produced hammer, strin
and o couple of double pointed tacks.
The tacks she drove in lightly at eac
side of the window casing and ran til
string through. One end of it she tie
to the handle of the dinner bell and th
other around the neck of bottle of an
monia.
Directly in front of the sill she place
n large mustard can, with the lid yer
lightly laid on.
1t did not contain anything so mild {
mustard, though. 1t was filled to I'll
brim with cayenne pepper-Natal CO.
enne at that.
"Now," declared Mrs. Pierce, steppin
back to view the result of her labor, g
any burglar gets i'll there without OF
hearing him, it's queer story. He's ce
tain to founder into the water, knoc
down the tins, ring the bell, break the bo
tie of ammonia and get the red peppt
into his eyes into the bargain. And ser7
him right, tool" in aggrieved anticip
ton of possible intruder.
Myrtle's round eyes were rounder tha
ever.
"Oh, ma, it's worse than dynamit
] amt it! Oh, ma, you're an awful sma
woman! Amt you, MAJ"
Miranda Pierce smiled the smile of a
preciated supremacy. But she only a
swered modestly:
II have genius for expedient
Myrtle"
When, after having made a final +
viewing round of the house they wei
up stairs to bed, the spouse of Dav
Pierce produced revolver, which 81
tucked under her pillow.
"Now if we hear the crash in Il
kitchen. Myrtle, I'll just open the wi
dow, fire off the revolver, and yell, p
lice'"
Myrtle shuddered reverentially at sue
heroic resolution.
'Oh, ma, you're awful brave" 81
whispered, as she got into bed and co
cred her head up tightly in the clothes
The night wore on-a warm, mois
dark August night. Mrs Pierce, pr
foundly confident of the success of h
barricade, should an entrance be a
tempted-or rather assured in such
? case she would be aroused, and brimf
= of other equally clever expedients-wel
= placidly to sleep. But wide-awake, ha
suffocated, shaking with terror, Mvrt
covered by her side.
Eleven!
! How could her mother sleep whe
those terrible burglars might even no
be creeping up the back yard? Anoth,
hour of agony dragged by.
Twelvel
There was the clink OF bell as it ella
tered to the floor, an appalling rattle
falling tins, and then feries Of yells an
groans and howls.
"oh, maj" quavered Myrtle, as a tr
mendous sneeze from the floor belo
terminated in a below of pain.
"It's the pepper getting in its worl
my dear!' explained II 3. Pierce, as 81
grabbed her weapon and sprang out {
bed.
Across the room size rushed, flung u
the window, fired Off the revolver as 81