Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1889-08-22

Us, an we'll clean the Swamp fer ye FIN
to izzardn
"They call my great-gran'pap OP-man
afeerd- of his hoe for some reason be-
know'd to their day an gin'ration. The
oil man were an up-an-up, or fashi oned
Hard-shell Baptist, an consequently
b'lieved th't vile tn want puthin' like
water fer the spiritual welfare o. the out
side, the inside didn't need it 60 any
p'tic'lar aIarmin' degree, an SO he KEEP
barn o. sumpip' a leetle stiff Ia the
cellar. FIN the very fust time he met
these InjiDs wen he settled in Sugar
Swamp, my great gran'pap c'nenced to
giVe'em good advice, an lag down doc
| tern to 'em, but, TO show 'em tint he
di5n's hav no hard feelin's to'afds 'em,
nor hold any grudge agin 'em, be mixed
a snifter or two o. contribution I'm his
bsr'I with mis- lectur's. It got so th't the
| In jins, some of 'em, d come over TO great
gran 'pap's clearin' two or three times
| day 10 listen to good advice, an the OF
mans lectur's got to be SO poplar tb't he
had to send back 70 Jersey fer another
bar'I o apple jack fore he'd been to
Sugar Swamp q month. The good OF
HardshelI Baptis' usety to be the one TO
travel hand in hand with civilization, an
error of his onregen'rit' natur'!
"Wuli, time slid on, an one by one this
tribe o. Injins quit lookin' on Sugar
| Swamp forever an forever. The con-
sid'ri'ness o. the most on 'em fer my
great gran pap's feelin's ez they went
away we're likewise tetchin,' fer arter
| half dozen or SO o. war-whoopers had bid
faT'welI to kim, an foun' th't she were so
cut up an broke down over the partin'
th't he never thort to unlock his cellar an
mix sumpin' with the large doses of fec
tfonit advice he give 'em fer the last time,
the rest o. the red men didn't think it
were right TO harry the OF mans feelin's
no more by biddin' him good-by, an they
tore their5elfs away, and bellered their
sorrow alone. At last they was all gone,
but one brave op war-hooper named Je-
nutty- bo-bo. Je-nutty couldn't stand it
to leave the hum o. his red skinned paps
an gren'-paps anigreatgran'pap an he
cluug to Sugar Swamp, takin' in good
advice ez fast ez my great gran'-pap d
let him an weepin' an moanin' fer the
good oil warhoopin' days th't civilization
had come down on an squasned, b'gosh,
like dog roIlin' on toad stool.
zone day Je-nutty- fer
| got TO tell ye, means, in English, Got
throat like holler log-went to my great
gram pap an says:
'Oi'-man- afeerd-of his-hoe,' says he,
I'm goin' fishin,' and don't ca'c'late to
be iok for three days says he. kin ye
make it handy says he, 'to turn me out
yer good advice fer them three days ell at
one settin'' says he, AN give me the
trirnmin's in a haIf.gallon Jug, SOS I kin
take 'em with me- says he.
THAT were a tolerable cheeky thing fer
| Je putty to asst, but my great graG'-pap
thort th't mebbe it were all fer the best,
an he Jumped the Injin's three days sup
ply of advice, an SO forth, an he went
away ez happy ez the tail end of
mighty tribe of Iniins could be with a
half gallon o. applejack all to hisself-an'
that's pooty dinged happy. OF Throat
like boiler log jumped in his canoe an
padded up Big Biler Run till he were
mile or more 'bove the high falls. Fore
he got thar he had tempered his stock of
good advice with considerable number
o. pulls at the Jug, an then he got tired
o. paddlin', an got out on the shore an
cut a great big bush an fastened it TO the
bow o. his canoe, SOS the wind'd blow
agin it an sail him along. All he had 10
do then were TO jist steer the canoe with
his paddle. Artar pull or two more at
| the jag Je-nutty got tired O steerin, an
he dropped mis- paddle an laid down in
the canoe, Gus to the jug, an techin' of
| it now an then.
"Not more'n two hours arter my great
gran'pap had sent Je-nutty-bo-boo on his
wey rej'icin' he went out to Big Biler Run.
a hundred foot or so 'bove the high falls,
whar the water runs swifter'n mill race,
an lookin' up the stream he see q canoe
with bush sail in the bow, skinnin' long
to'ards the falls, and trayelin' a mile
minute. Ez the canoe swep near he see
th't it were Je-nutty's, an th't the min
were layin' in the bottom of it, with his
hand on the jug. Unless he got no an
used his paddle in less'na minute, tn
WANT uuthin' KID save him FIN going over
the falls, but Je-nutty ever moved. My
great gran'-pap hOllered to him to jun Q
up an paddle, but the Injin iist riz half
way up. He couldn't git no furder.
Wavin' his one hand to'ards the big bush
in the bow, and clutchin' the jug with
t'other I'm, he hollered back to my great
gran'pap:
"'Too much bushr he hollered. Too
muchr
can the mex minute the canoe were
dashed over the rosrin' falls an nuthin'
| were ever SS6u OI n6HEu u -UO Oh
no more. The last of that consid'rit race
o. Sugar Swamp Injins has been gathered
to his fathersv
can that's the reason, it is, th't Bill
Fiddle WANT to Bingmuster's stun
froIic!" said the Squire, with contemp-
tuous sniff, as the Old Settler ceased.
That's the reason b'gosh, th't it wan t
never polite in Sugar Swamp, after that,
TO sey th'te feIier were drunk!' exclaimed
the Old Settler. Sim then on it were
alluz too much BUSH The day o. Bing
muster's stun frolio Bill Fiddler has been
out lectioneerin for his chances for
Sheriff. l see 'em carry him in the house
wen he druv back hum. / don't say he
were drunk. You wonder why he want
to the stun frolic. l said TOO mach
bush" stick to wat 1 said, an leave it 60
hist'ry, b'gosht'lm1ghty, to bear me out
in it!''
FRENCH AUTHORS ON SMOKING.