The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1889-01-02
The Eagle and Tlle 1loosler.

y
not bear investigation. Hence, we
say shoe and scat TO this repul-
sive bird. We want him not in
our backyard. In our distant pale
green McGnfyis Fonrth Reader
youth, we bcheld in the eagle the
standard bearer of the nation. He
scared ON tireless wings all around
the world, making the turkey-buz-
zard look sick. He could look into
the face of the sun and never blink
an eye. In his iron claws he held
barbed arrows which he jabbed into
foreign sons of guns who dared to
go round with chips on their shout
ders in his presence. Alas that
mighty eagle of our youth aforesaid
was never yet seen on sea or land
by any human eye!
But the real live eagle that we see
do-day Is the dirty, ragged, ugly
freak OF a dime museum, without
the slightest trace of moral charac-
ter. He has no place in society
among the feathered creation, his
only associate on earth is "coonp
and they are both thieves. After a
block-five election with votes at
from twenty-five cents to dollar
a head, you see these two vagabonds
in alb the Republican newspapers.
Golf and Atkinson disappear and
these two are their representatives.
Then yo1 want to hit the eagle with
a dead cat
Down will, the eaglet
Up with the rOostert
Cock a doodIe-doo, for the Ameri-
can birdl
Yhe rooster Is a Democrat. BE is
handsome. he is gay-just look at
that neck? behold that tail-no eagle
can touch them.
The rooster is son of the morn
ingi he is knight of the olden
time. He was one ofthe early chris
tains. When Simon Peter denied
his Lord who but the rooster stood
up and called him liar until Peter
went out behind the ash-hopper and
cried.
Tie rooster is pattern of chival
ry. To the fair sex he is ever gal
liant and polite. The eagle hunts
him up an old woman, as ugly as
himself and together they go off to
a stonepile and build themselves a
home ont of clubs, barbed wire and
brick-bats, and never speak to any
body.
Not So with the rooster. He re-
CARDS marriage as q faissre-cer-
tainly after seeing the eagse-and
lives a very mormonly but respecta-
BILE life; he never whips any of his
wives.
The rooster is a son of tell. He
digs for his living like Old Father
Adam But he is not mean and
stingy. When he finds choice
morsel of worm or a bug he in
vites all the world to come and share
it with him-all, except that other
rooster is Republican.
When the weather is, fne-after
q good DeDOcrat1c shower, the
rooster much appears. He did not
appear much this year, on account
of the weather. But there is coed
rooster weather atead and dong
YeR forget II.
The rooster hs#sand--f his craw.
This is whoiey for the purpose of
Ballast, to- make him steady on his
feet wbep he gets into fight. This
is recent discovery in natural
history made by us, and the theory
that sand and gravel are ever used
by the rooster for the purpose of
grinding up stolen corn is expletled-
as a base invention of the eagle.
When the rooster appears in DEM
Ocratie newspapers you mag go to
bed with the. doors open and never
mind about the vault windows
being closed, for then coke evens
don't vomit forth scratched ballots
nor sixteen-year old boys don't go
around swearing that they are men,
se'get Doodle. These things never
happen, except when the eagle and
the cOe'' are about heaping up de-
vilment and fiGing up aftidavits and
buying votes and making perjury
as common as betting on a horse
race.
L. pluribus rooster.