The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-22
HAYsEED IN THE BARBER's HAND
He stood 1t Until the Barber Broke
"Aigs" on His Head, Then He Kicked.


"Aigs" on His Head, Then he Kicked.
From the Detroit Free Press
Any one could see by the old mans man
ner as he entered the elegantly appointed
city barber shop that he was little taken
back by the splendor of the place. He
hesitated just inside the door and glanced
around in bewildered way at the dazzling
decorations, the marble floors, the rows OF
chairs and mirrors and white-jacketed bar
bers: and when porter took his valise and
hat and hustled them away to the other
side of the room his eyes followed them
with an anxious and startled gaze, until he
saw that they were properly cared for.
Then he looked around and saw that half
dozen BARRIERS had taken positions by as
many vacant chairs and stood ready to
tackle him.
"Where shall set?' he asked.
Take any chair, sir" said an attend
ant, and the old man got into the one near
est him and settled back with a solemn ex-
preston Of countenance, as though he had
begun to wonder what this thing was 60
ing TO cost.
SHAVE or hair cut?" asked the barber.
"Well, did want both," answered the
old man in a voice which might indicate
that he was uncertain whether he still
wanted both or not.
"All right, sir; I'll cut your hair first"
and adjusting his chair. the barber tucked
cloths around the old mans neck and COM
menced operations.
How'll you have it cut, sirs" he asked.
"Heyp
How'll you have it cut this timer
"HowT
! Eyes; want it shortF'
sHoRT2 YES.
"Wul, yes" answered the old man, as
y. ha tou haa
healthy idea to have it cut long.
meek shavedP asked the barber, after
he had been clipping for while.
"Heyw
"Will YOU have your neck shavedp'
"Well, you're goin' ter shave my face,
amt vera l amt particular either way about
my neck; shave it if yer wanter, though"
straight down, / suppose"
| 80, straights yer can; Iain't particular
| "Shampoow asked the barber a moment
| later.
| "Heyr
| "Will you have a head washr
| "Wul, guess SO; yes, wash it out"
"Stand!" called the barber, and an asss t.
ant went over and placed seat and towels
beside the marble basin and then put a
couple of eggs on shelf in front of the
BARRIERS chair.
Hard billed eggs for lunchY asked the
old man. who began to feel a little more at
home.
"No," answered the barber; "those are
raw eggs for the shampoo"
docs he eat 'eIn raww
| "Who?"
'The shampoo"
AN EXPLANATION.
The gentlemanly barber explained that
the eggs were for the head wash; that they
were very much better than the prepared
stuff for that purpose; made the hair nice
aud soft, aad had no bad effect on the scalp,
Then he took one of the eggs, tapped it
gently on the corner of the shelf, picked a
little hole in the end of it, and began to
pour out the contents slowly on the old
mans head.
Hold on, there! Hold onl" exclaimed
the old gentleman. excitedly, sitting up
straight. 81 guess this things gone bout
fur enough now. It's all right ter be askin'
me fool questions about whether want m
hair cut short or long, n whether / want
m neck shaved N M head washed. It's
all right ter try an make fool of al old
man in that way eff yer wanter, but by
gosh eff yer think you're goin' ter send me
out o. here tn m hair all stuck up vita aig
- How much do | owe yerp he asked,
standing up ard trying to pull the cloths
from around his neck.
The proprietor Of the shop labored long
time to convince the old man that they had
l
not until good-natured customer in one of
the chairs ordered an egg shampoo and
allowed the eggs to be poured into his hair
that the old gentleman became satisfied
Then he meekly climbed iuto the chair and
told the barber TO go ahead.
The barber rubbed aud rubbed aud
worked up lather, led the old man like a
lamb over to the basin, squirted hot and
cold water over his head I'd into his ears,
led him back TO the chair, shaved him
spatted him with wet towels, nodded and
kneaded bis face, dug out his ears. oiled hls
hair and combed II barber style, and
through il all the old man never opened
his mouth or uttered a sound, but when the
boy had slapped him all over with whish
broom. and he had paid his bill u % cents
and walked solemnly out, II was apparent
that be was doing heap Of thinking.
COLQUITT, GA. Aug. s. 1855.
MEssRs J.. r. SHIFTS a. Col have
been using Bile Beans in my family for
Dillous nsss, which Ne are ell subject 10 In