Omaha daily bee., 1889-02-24

nee, II Is the last Oar OF the Il III
La ~Somuambula,' betrayed out OF the
pocket OF a citizen OF Montcvidco. The
trostlcs are the lloritura from The Bar
ber;' II Chicago pork-packcr furnished
the money for that. These reflections,
| say, afford II sweet satisfaction to the
residents OF the domain. Moreover. the
mountain ON which the castle stands is
to be bought and paid for in the same
name y few pCarly notes in Chill,
n scale or so in Peru. and there you
have your mountain. II the mountain
is not in the right place, remove it-or
bore Il hole through it. Nothing easier;
"A mouthful of trills TO the P~atagonians,
and the thing is done!
"Indccd, when you have Il bank in
your throat, why deny yourself any
thingy Castles ON mountains, parks on
rocks, gas works for your own private
u%se-these are n mere ~bagatcllc, and
they will be useful, also, to stimulate
the enterprise OF the directors with the
golden salvcrs aforesaid.
"But-and this is IN odd circum-
stance w shall be awfully bored in our
magnificent castle. The Chiliau-that
benevolent Chiliau who gives his gold
dollars to hear the voicc-thc famous
voice, has. after all, only gold dollars
to give: and though YOU may build cas-
Ties Will lh'Ul lIltN VIII puN YOU lt
friends. Therefore, monsieur ana mad
anne live alono-all ulone-with mon
sicur's secretary and madamc's com
p]aniCn. with monsiour's professor OF
billiards, and madamc's accompanies;
Nladamc's dogs, too. they must not be
forgotten: only that Of late it has been
discovered that the poor dogs are vul-
n and but one miserable little hair
less eur is left. Il miracle OF u%glincss,
who sleeps in madame's chamber and
has II fur coat just like madamc's.
"And there is another remarkable
feature in the domestic economy OF
this remarkable castle. Madame, who
has earned the entire outfit with her
W remarkable voicc-nadamc. who
Is Tor rather should hc) everything
madame. | say, is actually absorbed i'll
monsieur, who, us all the world knows,
is nothing whatever but the husband of
madame. All, Cupid, this is one OF your
whimsical pleasautries! Madame Il
psychologist. might express it differ
emily, but the fact remains-madame
loves monsicur-yes, there is no deny
ing it. she loves him! nay, she adores
him, she pets him, she admircs him! And
newell, he submits. He loves her
(pcrhaps); at any rate, he takes good care
of her. IT is he that su~perintcnds the
diet, that opens the letters, that eX-
amines the newspapers lest she might
happen upon an uncomplimcntary par
arrnph which would annoy her and thus
iniure her voice. Everything, remcm-
Der. hinges on that voice: everything
has been regulated to meet its require
ments. We breakfast, We dine. mt such
hours as suit the voice. We discuss only
such topics us are not disturbing TO the
voice. We go out only in such weather
=. A. -. nc - 40
out. we never on any p%rctensc stop any
where on account of the voice. We re-
return at II fixed hour, still ,ior the sake
of the voicc-the voice which, by the
bv. is never heard in this immense cas-
tie. Madame does not even talk, lest
she impair the voice. Is there not
something fantastic about all this? The
castle Of the voice in which the voice 81
mover heard!
at is true we nave the privilege of
listening to monsieur. Monsieur on
longer sings; he has no need to look
after his voice. And he does talk; he
even talks a great deal. OF course one
must talk n great deal in order to give
commands to forty rctaincrs-to five and
forty, to be accurate--of all ages.
colors, sizes, and sexes. Some of
these retaincrs do nothing but take care
of madamc'S costumes. those 692 cos
tunes which have been admitted in all
parts OF the planet. which ave eXtorted
the obs and abs of delight of Chill,
Peru, and the equator, and which now,
like sacred relics, hang in Il sort of
museum with labels, commemorative
the triumphs Of the voice. Everything
that has had any connection with the
voice is ~kept-even the slippers and
silk stockings.
80 IN this castle, whore the chief
distraction is to attire ones self in
grand toilet for Il tcte-a-tcte dinner, do
monsieur and madame pass their time
in mutual admiration. Monsieur watches
over madame. She can drink, for in
stance. n certain kind of water only,
warmed in a PAL ticular way, and of a
temperature immutably the same. Mon
sicur, likewise. has things specially for
himself. At the table there is mon
%sleur's special vine, which monsieur's
special valet pours out for him, the
guests drinking vim o~rdinGirc; there is
mousieur's special roast of beef, eaten
by monsieur exclusively and not passed
to the others; and there is mOnsieur's
private divan, which the majOr-dOmO
requests guests not To use, rs it is re-
served for monsieur.
There are two diversions at the cas-
tie lin addition to dressing for dinner
-mOnSieur'S game OF billiards and mon
sicur's angling. After dinner mon
siour plays billiards with Il special cue,
kept in a box with q special key; h
billiard table is Il special table, and II
professor has beer specially engaged at
IL fat salary to play with monsieur.
Madame watches monsieur play in deep
admiration. All is quiet; not n sound
allowed from one end of the castle TO
the other. Monsieur is ,playing bill
lizards.
After breakfast monsieur goes fish
ing; special rivers and salmon have
been secured for mOnsicur's favCrite
pastlme. The fishing tackle is manu-
featured specially for monsieur; the
rods are of marvellous woods, cut by
slaves in distant and b]arbarous regions
specially for monsieur; and the bait
which monsieur uses is Il special species
of Ny, bred specially for monsieur, and
monsieur fishes for hours and madame
watches him. and the rctainers stand
guard and warn away the vulgar herd
who would approach. And the birds
are ordered to hold their tongues and
the leaves are forbidden TO rustic and
everything Oboy5-eVcrything except
the fish. which are shOciinglY ob7Li-
nate and wont be caught. Yes, the
fish are disobcdicnt and so are the bill
lard balls, If one is to believe the cues.
AT certain periods of the year the
voice is heard singing airs, always de-
" l.