davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-22
Tw1as TO STAY A TORRENT.

The most thriving industry among the
chief officials of the Government at Wash
ington just now is the building of barriers
against office seekers. Secretary of the
Treasury Window has promulgated notice
to applicants for places in his department
that they must ask for interviews and pre-
sent petitions before one o'clock in the day.
Persistence, whether personal or document
ary, after that hour will be fatal to the can
didate's chances.
Urged by similar reasons, President Har-
rison is reported as saying: ST have made
ND my mind that shall make no promises
L don't propose to have people going around
on the streets saying have lied about ap-
pointments or anything else" But Mr.
Harrison can hardly hope to escape the So
licitation of the thousands who think they
have right to obtain promises from him.
In the other departments the state of af-
fairs is the same. The rush is not unprece-
dented, but there is no railing off in the
number of noble creatures who are willing
to jump into the glare of public life for a
moderate compensation.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-22
NOTES OF THE LOCAL STAGE.

THAT indefatigable prima donna, Miss
Emma Abbott, wishes it to be clearly under
stood that she will appear as Elsie Maynard in
'sThe Yoemen of the Guard" at the Saturday
matinee at the BiJou- Miss Abbott is afraid
that because she always takes Wednesday af-
ternoon for rest some of her friends are doubt
full about her singing on Saturday afternoon.
She will sing at every performance the rest of
the week. At the Saturday night performance,
in compliance with many requests, she will
sing "The Last Rose of Summer" between the
acts of THE Bohemian Girl"
"OUR GOVERNOR will hold reception at
the Opera House tonight assisted by Mntitdd
Starr. .'the authoress on her travels" The de-
Iightful comedy is well known to theater-goers
as being one of the most prolific of rare amuse-
ment in the repertoire of The Fiorences. The
entire lower body of the house has been sold,
a large block of seats having been taken by
the MOBILES Of the Mystic Shrine.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-22
PRACTICAL ARITHMETIC.

REDUCE Jacks to gills
How many degrees in a college?
How many sins make one scruple?
How many perfumes make a scent?
How many pounds make prize fight?
REDUCE gallons of whisky to drunks.
How many seconds are there in duelG
How many feet make a book agent tired7
How many minutes in previous meeting?
How many barrels in political campaign?
ADD one oyster to each plato of soup in q
church festival, and determine the rise in price
per Dlate.
PROBLEMS.
A MAINE grocer bought ten barrels of cider
at 81 barrel. How many of his friends were
afflicted with chronic vertigo before the cider
gave out3
IF man spend three-quarters Of an hour try
ing to unlock the front door with button
hook, how much did he spend at the club dur
ing the evening?
A MAN puts 5000 in the hands of Wall
street broker, with instructions to invest the
same in wheat; how much does he lose by the
transaction7 Ana, 5000.
A MAN fails in business for $4,000 His cred
itors levy upon his assets and obtain s., 600 in
settlement of theit claims. How much does
$l3,0o0
A AND B play game of poker. At the
start A has $500. After playing two hours A
discovers that B is an army officer. He there
upon quits the game. How much does he have
left? Ans, Nothing.
IF an A. d. T. boy goes Cd an errand at the
rate of one mile in ~ hours, and another at tho
rate of one mile in So hours which viii come
out ahead matching pennies? What chance
has the man who employed them Of remember
ing what the message was about when he gets
the answer2-AU from Life.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-22
CANADIANS INSULT OUR FLAG.
The Stars and Stripes Subjected to Indignity
MT an Exhibition.

The Stars and Stripes Subjected to Indignity
Mt an Exhibition.
KINGSTON, ONT, March 2l.-The American
flag incident is still an exciting topic Of con-
versation. The details Of the affair are: The
City Hall was crowded by a fashionable audi
ence to witness National Representation"
Miss Annie Harold, one of the prettiest blondes
in the city, was selected TO appear as the
Queen of England" On the floor of the
stage was spread the Stars and Stripes, on
which was erected a throne. After Prof. Mar
shall, of Queens University, who acted as
Chairman, had made remarks the characters
came on the platform, the Queen first carry
ing scepter. He directed her to the throne.
and when she took her seat he alluded to the
Stars and Stripes as being beneath her. and
said the fact showed the relations existing be-
tween England and the United States. Amur-
mur ran over the audience, as many Americans
were present. The Professor again pointed to
the flag, and, while the Queen was looking
down at 1t, said:
That's the way Britons look at the American
flag"
She placed her scepter on the stars and
bowed TO the audience. Many Loyalists in the
hall took exception in private to the action of
the professor, who is Scotchman and came to
this country to take an appointment in Queens
University about five years ago. The next day
the matter was freely commented on and
letters appeared in the press strongly disap-
proving the professors course. In ali proba-
lege authorities, as some of the most brilliant
graduates of the college and the most liberal
giyers toward its endowment fund are Amer
leans
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-22
RHODE ISLAND REPUBLICANS
Nominate State Ticket and Favor Another
Vote ON Prohibition.

= ~~-@sO
Vote on Prohibition.
Providence, March 2l.-The Republican
State Convention met in Music Hall this morn
ing and was called to order by Isaac Con In
the absence of the regular chairman. On the
call of nominations for Governor, II. G. White.
Of Providence, named Governor Royal G. TAFT,
and he was nominated amid great applause
The Governor spoke of his inability to express
his thanks for the honor bestowed on him, but
could not change his mind from the decision
made early IN January not to accept TINS honor
again. "The office requires sacrifices ain no
longer able to give, The success OF a party
depends on no one man, but on its pr1nelples.
General William Ames on another call Tor
nominations nominated Governor Herbert W.
Ladd, Of Providence, and he was unanimously
indorsed by the convention. Hon. Enos w
L2pham was nominated for Lieutenant Gov
ernor, but Delegate Emerson said he was
authorized to state that while Mr.. Lapham ap-
preclated the compliment he is oOllSeo 20 ue-
cline. Daniel g. Littlefield was then nom, nom
mated; The rest Of last years ticket was tnen sn
renominated. Mr.. Ladd was presented TO tne
convention and made an address, accepting tne
honor and forecasting victory.
The platform congratulates the people Of the
United States at the return of the Republican
party to the National Government. 1t 1ndorses
the views OF the national policy set forth In
President Harrison's inaugural. 1t disapproves
or the practical suspension during the past
four years of that liberal course of national
pension legislation adopted by the Republican
party, believing it should be more generous as
the age Of these brave men increase. In re-
gard to respbmission of the prohibitSry amend
ment, the platform says: We believe it Is the
duty OF the General Assembly to permit the
people OF the State to pass Judgment upon any
proposed amendment to the constitution,
whenever an opportunity is demanded by any
large number of citizens, realizing that our
constitution furnishes full protection against
hasty changes
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-22
DEMOCRATIC BOMB.

The first gun in the State Treasurership
campaign is to be fred,we are informed, by
the Democratic battery in the Assembly at
Harrisburg to-day. Mr.. Wherry, the lead
er Of the Democratic side of the House, has
charge of the gun, and he has taken the
strange precaution to let his opponents
know beforehand the nature of the ammu-
milton and the point upon which the piece is
trained. There is not to be any ambuscade.
The valiant Wherry is above such tactics.
1t is not probable that the discharge of
this gun will hurt anybody, though san
guine Democrats assert that by it they will
establish to the satisfaction of intelligent
voters that the present Republican admins
traitors of the sinking fund have deprived
the State Treasury of enormous sums. For
a proper consideration of this matter it will
be well to await the debate promised for
fo-dav
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-22
4 GRAND FAREWELL,


| ~ AuctE Utu matt
The members of the Frohsinn Singing so
ciety gave grand farewell entertainment last
night in their old hall on Sixth avenue, con-
sisting of vocal and instrumental concert IN
which some of the finest local talent took part.
The hall was crowded to its utmost capacity,
In fact, number of the guests had to nna
room in the ante-chambers, and the necessity
of more accommodation was never more strlK'
ingly demonstrated to the members OF the
society. But patience is contented in very
small compass, and even If some of the guests
felt little cramped at first they soon forgot
their discontinue under the. spell OF the
musical charms which emanated from the
instruments Of such performers as Fidelia Zit-
terbart Fred Toerge and Charles Cooper.
While the programme was somewhat lengthy,
its details were anything but wearisome. be-
cause each selection seemed to stimulate the
musical desire of the audience to an eager
anxiety to listen to the entire number OF the
The members of Zitterbart's Orchestra, COM
posed of about, 40 musicians, chiefly young
amateurs, opened the programme with one OF
Beethoven's symphonies, which was rendered
in very pleasing manner. Then eight mem
bers of the Frohsinn Society sang double
quartet, which received great applause.
BY this time the audience seemed 10 De
warmed up. as it were, but when Mr.. Cooper
played cello solo in his usual mastery style;
Miss Agnes Vogel displayed her sweet voice In
a couple of beautiful German songs, and Prof:
Fldelia Zitterbart aroused the enthusiasm OF
every lover of music by his wonderful per-
formances on the piano, the entire audience
was pleased.
Prof. Zitterbart's rendition of the Scotch air.
fComin' Thro' the Rye represented the
climax of the concert. Everybody listened,
and silence pervaded the hall which, apart
from the softly ripping notes of the piano,
made 1t possible to hear pin fall on the floor.
Then grand chorus, entitled Morning in
the Forest" was sung by the members of the
Frohsinn in very happy vein, and a musical
quartet by Miss A. Zitterbart, Miss G. Guen-
ther, Miss ], Burgy and Mr.. Ed. Hoffman,, OBJ
tanned also well-deserved recognition from the
audience. A violin solo by Prof Fred. Toerge
was another gem of the performances of the
evening, and the genial Erred" was repeatedly
called back to his fiddle and bow"
A chorus, 1.-THE Singers March," by the
Frohsinn Society concluded the concert and
dancing was indulged in until after midnight.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-22
PENNSYLVANIA INVENTORS.
A List of the Patents Granted to the Key
stone State.

A List of the Patents Granted to the Key.
stone State.
ESPECIAL TELEGRAM TO THE DIsPATcR.I
WASHINGTON, March 2L-The following is
the list of patents issued from the United
States Patent Office for the week ending March
l6, for the State of Pennsylvania, as furnished
by Milo B. Stevens & Co., Solicitors of Patents
and Claims Glover building, Washington. D. c.:
Robert ]. Buchanan, Pittsburg, rotary measur-
ing wheel: Cyrus M. Carnahan, Coraopolis, as
signor to q. q. Dickey, trustee, Pittsburg. metal
blank for vehicle tongues; Emry Davis, Kane,
Inkstand; Darien W. Dodson, Wilkesbarre, Pa,
and f. 81. Richards, Springfield, Mass, said
Richards asclgnor to said Dodson, mechanical
movement; John W. Eisenhart York, wire twist
ing machine: Jacob s. Gibbs, Norristown, as
signor to Bridgeport Twine Binder Company, ten
sion device for grain binders; John
c. Glass, Verona, pressure regulator;
William j. Gordon and Z. ID. Gilbert, Philadei-
phia, sheet metal pipe elbow; Solomon l.. Gregg,
Greene, apparatus for filling and packing cans;
William E. Hghfeld, Philadelphia, machine for
changing the angle of the fange5 Of u and angle
bars; Charles A. Hitchcock, assignor oftwo-thirds
to 8. A. Davenport and W.. Burnley. North East,
telephone transmitter; James D.. Humphrey,
Towanda, numbering machine: Simon Miller,
Philadelphia, shirt; William H. Newell, Philadel-
phia, tank for water-valve t2), secret supply,
waste and overflow for basins and baths; Thomas
W. Norton. Shamokin, spool holder; Frederick
Q. Ross, Merchantville, N. j., assignor to I.
Powattain, PHILADELPHIA, pavement; Edward r.
Shellaberger, Beaver Falls fence; Gustav Seeding,
Philadelphia. coin controlled strength tester;
Jerome W. Wetmore. Erie, vehicle spring; Al
fred Wilbur. Allegheny, assignor OF one-half to
b. Il. Lightfoot Pittsburg, filter; Frederick
Winter. Allegheny, rendering.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-22
LAwLEssNEss In COLLEGE.

The President and faculty of Yale are
Justly indignant at an act of vandalism per-
formed by students of that ancient and hon.
ored institution. A statue of the celebrated
Professor Silliman was broken from its
pedestal and thrown in the mud by collie
gians, anxious to distinguish themselves by
doing something extraordinarily funny. Yale
is unable to see the point of the joke, how
ever. and it looks as if the mischiefmakers
would be doomed to lasting disgrace. The
students have held a meeting and passed
resolutions strongly censuring the guilty
ones and charging them with defaming the
good name of the university. If the perpe-
traitors of the outrage are detected doubtless
their immediate expulsion by the faculty
will follow.
1t is easy to understand that in an insti-
tuition where hundreds of young men are
constantly associated together the spirit of
fun should be rife. A certain latitude is
allowed to students, and the public in gen.
eral looks upon their pranks goodnaturedly,
regarding them as but the natural result of
a youthful tendency to vary the monotony
of college life. Students, however, should
be able to draw the line between fun and
lawlessness. There is no excuse for such
senseless and contemplate act as that at
tributed to these nameless Yale men. Even
street gamins would be ashamed to wantonly
destroy a work of art and an honored
mans monument from motives of mischief
alone. Where is the manliness of the rising
generation, ifpersons who are men in years
and matriculated members of one of the
chief educational institutions Of the land
stoop to deeds so small and degrading? It
is to be hoped that the offenders will be
caught. and after the Yale faculty has dealt
with them, handed over to court for further
punishment.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-22
TWO VERY DIFFERENT CLASSES


That usually thoughtful member, Mr..
Drayo, is quoted as supporting the alien
labor tax bill, because it would help to put
An end to the employment of such undesira-
bic elements as are found among the Hun
garians and Italians in the coke regions.
But examination serves to show that the
bill does not stop at single class, or specify
any special characteristics of the alien labor
that is to be taxed. 1t would, as its terms
now read, apply to the German, the Eng
lish, the Scotch, the Irish and the Welsh
laborers Just as much as to the Hungarian.
Representative Dearden made remark
able point when he urged that the United
States, not single State, must deal with
such questions. The Federal Government
has already taken a long step to prevent
such conditions as disgrace the coke regions
by prohibiting under severe penalties the
importation of laborers under contract. If
this statute is vigorously enforced-and
why should it not be?-immigrants can no
longer enter the United States excepting
upon their own resources and responsibility
IF they have enough self-reliance to come on
these terms, the chances are greatly i'm
proved of their quickly adopting the man
ners and spirit of their new home, in place
of being mere underpaid and underfed tools
in the hands of greedy capitalists.
The proposed Law is exceedingly crude in
other particulars. If the public appre-
hension is keen as to the undesirability of
certain CLASSES of immigrants, it is equally
mindful of the benefits which more desirable
classes of immigrants have conferred in
helping the national growth. To put all
alien labor everywhere through the United
States under the ban would be stupid from
an economic point of view and equally 50 in
apolitical sense. The alien, in probably
four cases out Of five, becomes citizen as
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-22
KING DINAH, OF WEST AFRICA.
He Decides That He Cannot Afford to Attend
the Paris Expositiou.

He Decides That He Cannot Afford to Attend
the Paris Exposition.
From the New York Sum-!
Those who have read of King Dinah, of the
Nunez river, West Africa, and of his hermet-
ically sealed beer brewery, which runs only
when the King is looking on, to prevent the
sly introduction of poison, will regret to learn
that after counting the cost he has decided
that he cannot afford to go to the Paris Expo
sition. He formally announced this fact a
while ago at banquet he gave to some French
officers. r
King Dinah once invited a rival chief to dine
with him. He prepared for his guest by dig
ging deep pit beside the festive board, con-
cealing it with branches and little earth, and
placing thereon the chair of honor which his
guest was to occupy twas thought that after
the rival chief had tumbled into the pit it
would be favorable time to fill up the exca-
walton. Somebody took the news to the in
tended victim, and on the appointed day he
had q pressing engagement elsewhere. His
grave has not yet been dug. If France would
give King Dinah deadhead ticket to Paris,
put him in conspicuous spot, and let him
distribute circulars describing his eventful
career. he would be one of the greatest curiosi-
ties in the big show.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-22
FUNNY MEMS FANC1Es.

Reason for Marrying.-"So, in spite Of
your previous resolutions. you are going to
marry?'' ''Only out Of revenge. My best friend
has just married. and he did not invite me to the
wedding. I will be reVenged. ''-FItegende
BLotteT.
An Easy Language.-Mr. Winks (read-
mg)-Prof. Davidson says that the English
language is easier to acquire than any other
language spoken.
Mrs. Winks-Of course it is. Even our baby is
learning it.-Tfme.
His Present.-A sweet girl-Mother,
George told me solemnly that that pretty hairpin
holder he gave TO me cost s5; yet to-day saw ex-
actly the same kind on sale for 10 cents. Mother
You know. my dear, George is very religious.
Most likely he bought It at q church falr.-Nso
York Weekly.
The Bluff Didn't Work.-Bully-Do YOU
know that am the chap lately acquitted for kill
ing man?
Meek-Looking Party-Yes; was in the court
room at the time when you blubbered and begged
the jury to think Of your wife and little children.
-Neso York Sun.
An. Opportunity Eost-'T say" said
Berkey to his wife yesterday at dinner, ''you
didn't say anything to anyone about what was
telling you the night before last did you? That's
a secret..'
"a secret! Why didn't know it was a So
cret, " she replied regretfully.
''Why, no, never thought Off since. didn't
know it was . secret. .'t-BostoFs Globe.
Society Notes.-It is regretted by the girls
that so many young men like "a Dutch at their
clubs so much more than they do "a German''
elsewhere.
A new dance will be introduced next season II
one can be found more crazy than some which
now exist.
Checks will be worn in bathing suits this year.
and fathers are now preparing to furnish the
checks for use.
Seaside cottages can usually be bought at about
ope-half their annual rental, but the trouble is
that they are sold for cash and are rented on
references. Most people have more references
than cash.
Rank does not go for much in this country.
SEINE people that are very rank fail to be ad-
mitted within sociefy's gates; but the rule has
undoubted exceptions.
Domino parties are fashionable just now, where
thev nlav whist instead Of domfnoes.
A dude,s highest ambition this year il to be
an eauestriau and lot Of donkeys have inst
been imported for them so that the unities nav be
preserved.
Everything goes in society except a few old
maids. who seem to possess wonderful staying
powers.
Il has been noticed that s.erass widow, D
never very green. -Esss Xark Susl.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-22
GETTING TO BE A NUISANCE.
Secretary Window Entirely Out of Patience
With the OHce Seekers.

Secretary Window Entirely Out Of Patience
With the Once Seekers.
WASHINGTON, March 2l.-Secretary Win
dom has been so overrun with ofice-seekers
that he has had scarcely minute to attend to
his official duties. This afternoon he dictated
the following notice, with instructions to have
it posted conspicuously throughout the build
ing:
The Secretary Of the Treasury reserves the time
from 10 till 1870 A. NJ. for receiving Senators and
members OF the House of Representatives. Other
persons desiring to see him upon matters relating
to official patronage will please call between IL 80
A. N. and P. NJ. The Secretary requests that he
may be excused from receiving visitors after p.
NJ, in order that he may be able to devote part
of the day to the consideration of the current busi-
ness of the department.
Secretary Window in speaking of this matter
said it will be well for Office seekers to UNDER
stand that it will not be to their interest to file
their applications after o'clock.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-22
WARNED TO KEEP OFF.
The President Issues Warming Notice In
Regard to the New indian Lands.

The President Issues Warming Notice In
Regard to the New indian Lands.
WASHINGTON, March 81 The following
telegram was sent at 4:30 o'clock this after
noon:
The Commanding General Division Missouri,
Chicago:
The act of Congress approved March 2, 1889, pro-
vides in substance, that no person shall be per.
mitted to enter upon and occupy the land recently
ceded to the United States by the Creek and Sem
mole Indians until said lands opened for set
tlement by proclamation of the President, and
that no person violating this provision shall ever
be permitted to enter any of said lands or acquire
any right thereto.
The President directs that the officers under
your command cause the people to be fully in-
formed of these provisions of the law, and that
they take and preserve the names of all persons
who may enter the territory in violation of this
provision, so that the same may be enforced by
the Land Department when said lands are law
fully opened for settlement.
By order of
MAJOR GENERAL SCHoFIKLD.
j, q. KELToN, a. A. g.