davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-29
BRIGHT BITS.

''Do YOU SEE ME?'' said the colored man boast
fully, as he passed behini the mule.
Yes" replied the mule, land raise YOU
Washington Capital
A FIREPRooF PoCKErBooK is one of the latest
inventions. 1t is probably intend I'd to prevent
money from burning holes in the pockets of The
owners,-Boston Herald
TOMMY, don't you want to go sailing?"
NAV"
why, well have spanking breeze"
That's wot'S the matter. n-NeW York
Herald.
INSURANCE AGENT-Now that you are married,
1 suppose you will take out policyg
Young Biggs-O, no. l guess not l don't
think she's going to be dangerous.-Terre Haute
Express.
WAeG Ito Bowser, who has his finger done up
in a rag)-Hello, how did you do that?
Bowser-Trying to hammer nail
Wagg-You succeeded, didn't you?-Ne1o
York Sun.
CoBw1GGER-When your wife found those
pool tickets in your pockets, did she say any
thing before she threw them in the fire?
Brownies. She asked if any of them were
winners.-LtJe.
FIRST CLAoUEUR-Why do you clap and hiss
at the same time?
Second Ditto-You see, the new actress has
paid me to clap, and her rival has paid me to
hSs!-L IndnStTTet
GREENAN BARRETT-Sick? OF course I'm sick
nervous prostration
Takitt Coolley-Been working too hard?
There are five babies in my boarding house. q"
Boston Times.
FIRST CRITIc--You are in error when you say
Nine Sylphide is IL years old. Tie woman is AZ
if she's day.
Second Critic-Haven't you found out yet that
there are professional ages as well as stage
names?-BOSton Times.
Mr.. SMART (as the church-goers pass(-Tm
surprised that Miss Sweet permits Boiworth to
accompany herY Hes about the freshest youns
Mrs. Smart Perhaps that's the reason why
she lets him carry her Psalter.-Boston Times
INDIsrINcT BUT RELIABLE.-Borrowt Gin Chi
nese laundryl why doAyou say Friday, John,
when you mean Ffidaye
Chnanan-l STAY Friday cause | mean FIJI.
day; not like Mclean man, who slay FI-day
aud come to pay me, week afteh next n erds
Strings. fzABtg At-
KENTUCKY GUIDE-Over in that small house
lives the most remarkable man in Kentucky
Tourist You doRt say so. Who in the dickens
Guide (solemnIyI- He's the only man in the
whole state that isn't called colonel-Philadel-
phid Inquirer
.'.gNcLE PETE, were yos eyer slaveY'
"Befo' de wah, yes, chile"
What is your last Nancy
Harrison, sab. "
The sapeas we Presidents"
Yes, chiles Bat he amt no relation OBJ
mine. Soc ETY..
1T HAS BEEN DEMONSTRATED in scores of in
stances that river will carry the germs of
typhoid fever sixty miles before they are rem
dered harmless. lie offered glass of water,
and you haven't tiIpesto figure how far below
Pittspurg you are, Just tell EN- you always pre-
fer champagne -L'stSott Free Press.
No END TO IT. I'm an insurance man, sir. -
What do You want now? You've made me
insure my life insure the title to nv raal eStata
insure my plate glass, and everything else /
own"
True, sir but the next thing to get insured
is your policy of insurance. "-Sociefy
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-29
Georgia Hes Made No choice.

There is quite noticeable effort to make
it appear that the democrats of Georgia
favor making Gov. Hill the democratic
candidate for President in 1892 Gov. Hill
was received certainly with great cordially
in Georgia, and he made a very favorable
impression upon those with whom he came
in contact The speeches which he delivered
during his southern trip, and his utterances
on southern questions on his return home,
tended to increase the regard which the
southern people have for him. Doubtless
Georgia, and, in fact, all the southern
states, would give him a very hearty sup
port if be should be nominated in 1892 for
President
The fact. however, that Gov. Hill is popu-
lar with the democrats of Georgia doesn't
necessarily justify the conclusion that her
delegation in the national convention in
1892 will favor his nomination. The prob
ability now is that Mr.. Cleveland will get
the nomination if he will accept it. The
leaders of both parties are of the opinion
that he will.
The greatest of the issues upon which the
two parties are divided is that of tariff
reform. Il will overshadow all others,
Judging from the present outlook, and no
one is so well fitted as Mr.. Cleveland to be
the leader Of the party in tariff reform
campaign. Gov. Hill is a sterling demo-
crat and tariff reformer. but he is not so
conspicuously identified with tariff reform
as Mr.. Cleveland.
A few Georgia newspapers, in speaking
Of Gov. Hills visit to the state, have de-
ella red their preference for him as the next
democratic candidate for President, and
several Georgians of more or less prominence
have done the same thing, but they do not
speak for the state, and their preference
now is no indication Of what the prefer
ence of the state will be in 1892
OF course great deal OF the talk in favor
of Gov. Hill is very sincere. 1t is based
upon the belief that the chances of his
election would be better than those Of Mr..
Cleveland. but the most of it-particularly
outside of this state-proceeds from feeling
of hostility to Mr.. Cleveland personally. 1t is
therefore hardly worth considering. 1t will
be no more general two years hence than it
is now.
Mr.. Cleveland is not being forgotten. He
has as strong hold upon his party as he
ever had. He is very popular with the
people, and, although he avoids appear
ing, as much as possible, upon public oc-
casions, it is noticeable that when he does
appear there is demon stration that shows
that he is still popular favorite
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-29
A Losing Business.

From the Chicago MaH
Tom Prior of the Chicago opera house lost a
c VnnIL snort time ago. The chum went to New
YORK to stay, and, inasmuch as Mr. Prior and
the chum were much given to shaking dice in a
social way of evenings between acts Mr. Prior
was dlsconsolate. Then about the fourth even
ing after his friends departure he received a
telegram from the New York man 1t read:
answer" GNU
This tickled Mr.. Prior immensely, and the
ne borrowed dice box, went over to the West
ern Union office, shook out four tours and sent
this dispatch to his friend:
four tours Horse on you. Your turn
ne Went back TO the theater and had only
peen IN the house about fifteen minutes when a
BOY came along with another message 1t read
second horse: Aces full on flves Shaker
MIR. Prior left several gentleman with whom
he was discussing Corsican folk lore and its
posSiolhtles In literary and dramatic way and
hustled overto the telegraph Office where he
caued on the clerk to witness that he shook
Ialrly. Then he ratified the dice a good deal
and finally shook skies and trays This occas-
Toned the following dispatch:
q, Two pairs. Skies and trays. Horse on me
He was considerably excited nv this time
and paced the foyer with look of abstraction
on ms race until the next dispatch arrived This
came just before the close of the performances,
Last horse: Four aces and six I've got
you" CIV
Mr., Prior made rush for the Western Union.
clutchng the dice-box as he went. He reused
the clerk, who was getting sleepy, and told him
10 act as lookout. Then he pounded the little
ledge IN front of the clerks window with the
bottom of the dice-box and rolled out the dice
TWO deuces appeared Mr.. Prior generally
threw away deuces on principle but he thought
ne would stick to these. He threw again Two
more deuces. One more shake for the last
deuce He pounded the box quite vigorously
and rolled out the die. A deuce! Five deuc IS
lie grabbed blank and wrote:
Five deuces. You lose. I'll take a cigar"
This he sent to his fiend in New York, and
went gleefully around to a place where he knew
tdey ke cigars and things and gave up IL
cents for cigar There were a lot of friends
glee. e''A'
How many kilograms did you sends'' asked
Lemme see." said Mr.: Prior. Three, of
course There were three horses"
How much were they apiece?''
Forty cents. Why?"
That made 81 20. Then you came around
mere and paid Is cents more. A dollar thirty
I'VE nv Tor cigar Do you reckon you go. much
Then Mr.. Prior said something about some
Fellows who would kick on the streets of gold
and call EN- plated and went sadly home
The remarks OF the analytical man had acted
on ms cup OF JOY as spoonful of acid phos-
phate would IN cup of milk. II was curdled.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-29
The Montana Fraud.

IL is very positively asserted that the
affidavits upon which the canvassers threw
out the Silver Bow precinct in the recent
election in Montana, and thus, on the face
of the returns, made the legislature repub-
lican, were fraudulent. As is well known,
nearly all the ballots cast in that precinct
were democratic. If the courts should sus-
tain the action of the canvassers, the repub-
licans would have majority of the legis-
lature, and Montana would be represented
in the United States Senate by republicans
instead of democrats.
In specials from Helena, the capital of
Montana, the information of the way in
which the fraudulent atiidavits were OBJ
tanned is furnished. 1t seems that the Sill
yer Bow precinct was held back until it
was known that the legislature was demo-
cratic by very small majority. 1t was
ascertained that if that precinct were
thrown out the legislature would be repub-
lican. Affidavits were obtained from men
who voted the democatic ticket at that pre-
cinct, and who could neither read nor write,
that they voted the straight republican
ticket. For these affidavits it is alleged a
great deal of money was paid. In other
cases, men who voted the straight demo-
cratic ticket were induced to make affi-
davits that they voted that ticket, and in
those affiiavits the word democratic" was
changed to republican" The whole
number of affidavlts obtained was much
greater than the number of republican
ballots found in the ballot boxes. These
afiidavits were presented to the canvassers,
the majority Of whom were republicans,
and they decided to throw out the entire
vote of the precinct.
II the story Of these fraudulent affidavits
is true, those who concocted and carried
out the scheme to defeat the will of the peo-
pie ought to be severely punished. Indeed,
state prison would be too good for them. 1t
is stated that the grand jury of the county
in which they reside has been instructed to
inquire into the charges against them. The
success of the great fraud of 1876 has in-
fiuenced republicans in many parts of the
country to undertake to accomplish by
fraud what they failed to do by fair means
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-29
Invite the Pan-Americans.

Secretary Blaine announced several days
ago that the delegates to the Pan-American
congress would visit the south, and it is
row pretty well understood that they will
start from Washington, southwark, in
January. Perhaps something has already
been done toward arranging the programme
of the visit. Quite a number of cities have
extended invitations to the delegates to visit
them and partake of their Inequalities, and
others, doubtless, will do so.
Savannah, Of course, will be one of the
cities visited. Her commercial Importance,
and the fact that she is one of the most
beautiful cities in the country, make that
certain. 1t would be a courtesy to the
delegates, however, which they would I'M
doubleday appreciate. for the city and the
exchanges to unite in extending to them a
formal invitation. Indeed, such an invita-
tion, extended through the Secretary of
State, might assist the state department in
making the programme for the projected
tour
New Orleans expects the delegates in that
city during the carnival season, and she is
preparing to so entertain them that they
will retain a pleasanter impression of her
than any other city. The carnival is ex-
pected to be very brilliant one, and New
Orleans win depend largely upon that and
the social features of that occasion, rather
than upon her industries, to make the visit
of the delegates an agreeable one. No
doubt the delegates will find New Orleans
very attractive city, and they will dis
cover customs there that will remind them
Of their own countries. They will not be
hurried from one point of attraction to
another, but will be permitted to follow the
bent Of their own inclinations
Because the majority of the delegates
said that they would prefer that the worlds
fair, on the Tooth anniversary of the dis
covery Of America by Columbus, should be
located in New Orleans, the people of that
city think they stand an excellent chance
of monopolizing the trade of Central and
South America with this country. Doubt
less her chance for getting the lions sha re
Of it is very good, but she will
find strong competitor in Savan-
nah. Savannah is already getting a
good deal of fruit from Central American
west. If she takes the proper kind of an
effort, there is no reason why her COM
merce with Central and South America
should not be as great as that of New Or
leans 1t would not be surprising if Tampa
should become, within a few years, a
very popular port for the South American
trade.
The trade question, however, is one that
will not be settled yet awhile. The i'm
portant matter at present is to make the
visit of the Pan-American delegates to the
south one that will be pleasant to them. 1t
will not take them long to see that the
south is the section of this country with
which their trading will be done. When
they see the south's cotton fields and iron
deposits they will understand that the time
is not distant wnen she will manufacture
the articles they want. Let them be in
vited to Savannah, to see the port through
which SO large a portion of the products of
the south pass on their way to market.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-29
INDEX TO new ADVERTISEMENTS

EEErISes-Oglethorpe Lodge No. 1. l. o. o. F.
SPECIAL NOTICES Something Extra Fine for
Lunch To-day at Slllivan's; AS to Bills Against
British Steamships Evelyn, Washington City,
and Cyprus; Bluefield Bananas, Kavanaugh &
Brennan; For Reliable Drugs, Etc, Go to
Heidt's; AS to Crew of British Steamship Inch
borva; Special Programme at George Schwarz' s
Reading Room. with Faust Beer on Draught
from the Wood.
STEAMSHIP SCHEDULED Ocean Steamship Com
pany.
AUCTION SALEs-Old Established Saloon, Etc.
by J. Mclaughlin & Son; House and Lot, Con-
tinued Sale of Groceries, Etc, by LaRoche &
Mclaughlin.
BARGAINS IN PIANOS AND ORGANs-Davs Bros.
CHEAP COLUMN ADvERTIsEMENrs-HelpW Want
ed; Employment Wanted; For Rent; For Sale;
Lost; Personal; Miscellaneous.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-29

An ex-convict named Thomas Shea
started out in Boston the other day to find
John L. Sullivan, with the supposed inten-
ton of numbering hum. He finally found
him in a BARRIERS chair. He seated himself
near by, and kept up a running fire of
badlnage, curses and insults. which Sui
livan returned. In the barber shop was
one of Sulhvan's admirers, aR old-time
lightweight pugilist named James Kelly.
Kelly was very drunk, and he took it into
his head that he must protect his friend
Sullivan. Consequently he picked up
razor, walked up to Shea, and inflicted
upon his neck a cut from the effects of
which it is thought that he will die. Sui
livan ordered Kelly out of the shop, paid
all possible attention 10 Shea, and remarked
that il wasn't necessary for any one 10 do
his lighting.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-29
A laundering Omcial.

Secretary Noble seems to have a genius
for laundering. He tried to make x-Com-
missioner Tanner the scapegoat for the
pension bureau scandal, but when Mr..
Tanner came back at him with statements
that permitted the inference that the
pension bureau was being run in the in
terest of the Republican party he concluded
he had made a mistake, and he has not
been heard from since upon that subject.
He became offended at the wording of the
resignation from the pension service of Mr..
Thompson, of Albany, N. Y, and wrote
that gentleman a very undignifed letter.
If he thought that his official position
would protect him. from an indignant an
swer, he was mistaken.
Gen. Mobiles last bluuder was the removal
of Mr.. Charles f. Conrad, useful employe
of the government, appointed in 1887 to Cb-
tain information concerning the Benson
syndicate land survey frauds in California,
Nevada, Oregon, Colorado, Arizona, New
Mexico, Idaho, Montana. Washington, and
Utah, by which frauds John A. Benson and
others are said to have gained possession
Of hundreds of thousands of dollars
to which they were not entitled.
If the charges made against Secretary
Noble in this connection can be substan-
tlated, he is guilty of something more than
a blunder The Harrison administration
HAD been in power only few days when Mr.
Benson was informed that his services would
be dispensed with, but it was shown that
he was an efficient officer, and he was re-
luctantly reinstated In August he was
again dismissed, only to be again reinstated,
and the other day Secretary Noble dis
missed him finally. 1t is known that Sena-
tors Stanford, Stewart, and Jones and
other wealthy public men demanded Mr..
Conrad's removal, and Mr.. Conrad states
that these gentlemen were mixed up in
the frauds he was investigating 1t was
very natural, therefore, that they should
want him out Of the way. Secretary Noble
admitted that Mr.. Conrad did effective
service, and the best excuse he could offer
for removing him was that he was ''getting
up suspicious against everybody connected
with the administration This, it will
strike the public, was very lame excuse
Mr.. Conrad may return to California as a
witness in the cases be has worked up, but
the secretary has sought to destroy the
effect of his testimony by broadly intimat-
ing that nobody should believe what he
says. Is the secretary trying to shield his
wealthy friends from exposure?
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-29

The Philadelphia Press has the brazen
etfrontery to say that if the proper measures
were taken to do away with the condition
of things in Harlan county, kentucky, (the
scene of the Turner Howard fights that
state would not be so strongly democratic.
If the Press doesn't know that Harlan
county is strong republican county, its
ignorance is inexcusable. The attention of
the republican organs has been called to
the fact several times lately. As was
pointed out by the MORNING NEWS the
other day, the localities in the south most
noted for lawlessness are those controlled by
republicans; and yet republican organs go
right on trying to create the impression
that whatever lawlessness there may be in
the south is always in some way the out
growth of democratic rule.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-29
The MonSNe News is on file at the Following

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The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-29
A Man to be Avoided.


1t is not safe to tell story in the hearing of
James A Meade, the manager of the ..Bluebsard,
Jr, SHOW, at the Broad Street Theater, for
fear that he viii recognize it as a back number.
Mr. Meade is so much Of a veteran that he has
heard pretty nearly every yarn that is swapped
among the theatrical folk. A day or two ago
De Wolf Hopper, who is an inimitable raconteur,
was working of what he called a ''corker'' to a
group In the Continental cafe. 1t was good
one, and Hopper made it even better by a way
OF narrating il that was a. clever as anything
ne does on the stage. He had got it from
Adonls" D1xey, and was pretty sure that it
was quite a new thing
Think that's not a chestnut, Hopper" Mr.
Mea 9 asked in his quiet fashion when the story
had 6een finished and everybody in the group
had laughed.
Certain, =" answered Hopper
We'll, said Mr.. Meade between the puffs at
MS cigar, "Eph Horn used to tell it somewhere
near thirty years ago."
Silence fell. Hopper was paralyzed for per-
maps the first time in his life and when he re-
gained his breath he employed it to ask every
body up to the cigar stand
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-29
Rep1ssered at the Postocloe in savGnnah

The MoRsTse News is published every day in
he year and is served 70 subscribers in the city
~ Is cents a week. 81 90 s month. S. % for ak
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The MORNING News. by ucl, ono month.
d 90; three months. 81 50; ax months IS 20;
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The MoHsso Nkws. b. mda six times q week
without Sunday issuel, three months, y 90;
Eix months. 50 90; one year So 90.
The MoRN1Ne HKvs. Tri-Weekiy, Mondays,
Wednesdays and Fridays, or Tuesdays, Thurs
days and Saturdays, three months. 81 IS; sAx
months, o. so; one year, IS 90
The SUNDAY News, By mail one year, - 90.
The WEEKLY News. by ssdil, one year. 81 d
Subscriptions payable in advance. Remit by
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Fency sent by mail at risk of senders
Letters and kilograms should be addressed
MORNING NEws," Savannah, Ga
Advertising rates made known on application
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-29

The Rev. John Jasper of Richmond, Va,
has been ridiculed great deal because of
his as ertion that the ''sun do move" but he
isn't so greatly lacking in sense as one might
suppose. In fact, he has recently shown
himself to be one of the most sensible col
ored men in the country. A good many
colored preachers in Virginia signed let
ter calling upon the colored people of that
state to vote for Malone. 1t was in their
line Of mixing very bad politics with what
ought 10 be religion. The Rev. John Jas
per did not sign the circular. He said that
his mission was to preach the gospel, and he
added: THE church is no place for politics,
as it is the house Of the living God, and
have never allowed politics to be brought in
my church. When am away some Of my
brethren may got up and give their views,
but they don't do 10 when AN thar"
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-29

Republican organs are very anxious 10
stop tho talk about the forgeriss In that
state by which Candidate Canpbelps in
tegrity was assailed, but neither the demo.
Gratis Of Ohio nor those OF other states are
disp sd b drop the matter. The Oalo
republicans should be taught that II mans
character h attacked ~ 3 at uaserup ilous
manner, the political party for whose bene.
10 the attack was mado viii b. tho loser
rather than tue gainor.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-10-29

Some Of the republican organs say in
effect that the appointment of Col. A. E.
Buck as United States marshal for the
Northern distriot of Georgia is the Presi-
dents comment upon the action Of the
Atlanta people in burning him in efigy
"for preaching the dreadful heresy that a
black skin should not Of itself debar It's
possessor Of place in the public service. A"
The republican organs might try 10 answer
THIS question; II tie President wanted {,
rel,uke the people Of Atlanta for the matter
rsferrvd y, why didn't be appoint q black
republican Instead u a white oaei The
PRESIDENTS "eonmentn doesn't seem 10 be
saesny lat the republican, Organs would
save 1hs celorsa people believe