The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-09-12
Mark Twain's Remains.

y. d. Stebbins, an old printer, gives the
New YORK World this unpublished remi-
niscence of Mark Twain:
1T was when he was known only as Sam
Clemens He was local reporter on the
Virginia City Enterprise, and I was a
pr ter on the same paper. Clemens was
writing humorous sketches, but his fame as
humorist was young vet. He was an in-
veterate smoker, and smoked the foulest-
smelling pipe in Virginia City, by all odds.
Clemens office was just off the composing
room, and although printers as rule are
not squeapish about pipes and things, this
pipe was breeding revolution. 1t smelled
80 Internally bad that we always spoke OF
it as "ihe remains" There were
numerous plots suggested to get ''the
remains" out of the way, but
we hesitated about putting them into
execution when we learned that it was a
pipe OF considerable value, and one that he
cherished on account of its associations or
something IL was clear, however, that
something had to bs done, and we finally
concluded to present Clemens with a new
pipe. We had suffered so much from the
old pipe of thousand smells that we felt
justified in making him the victim of a
Joke, il we could, and so we secured the
town and bought the cheapest pine we
could find that would pass after night for q
good one. think it cost us 80 cents. One
night, after we had the paper up, we all
filed solemnly out into the local room and
presented Clemens with the pipe. We
threw as much ceremony into the presenta-
ton as possible. One of the BOYS made
an address that was really affecting. He
talked about the toilers in the profession of
| Journalism, their long nights of labor when
all the rest of the world was wrapped in
peaceful slumber. Then he worked in some
of the poetry about tobacco, and the solace
| it afforded the tired brain. He spoke of
the warm friendship that existed between
| the local department and the COMPOSING
room, and hoped nothing would ever occur
TO sever these silken ties Then he handed
him the 25-cent fraud, wiped his fingers
| through his eyes, and sat down.
Clemens was knocked completely out
for time, but he pulled himself gether
| and returned his thanks in a very FEELING
manner. He said the pretty gift from his
c)-workers on the paper touched him
! deeply, and he would retain it long as =
souvenir of pleasant days. The old pipe
had long been a friend aud companion. II
| had been comforter in lonely hours: hut
this handsome gift from friends he loved
made the parting easy. and, as a climax to
| his remarks, he threw the ill-smelling old
timer out of the window. We accepted his
invitation to go downstairs with him, anc
knowing the miserable swindle we had per
| petrated, every dollar he spent gave Us a
pang.
Tine very next night, while Cleme s was
smoking his new pipe, the bowl of the cusSeC
thing split open from stem to stern. W.
heard him growing to himself, and looking
| out of hole in the wall through which he
showed COPY we saw him brushing the ashe.
off his desk and clothes. AID swearing softly
III very picturesque manner He didn't
\ say q word to us aOOut tine nina or its fata
and you be- we said nothing to him. II
was evident, however, that he had done
something, for he appeared at the offic,
next night complaceltly smoking The
remains He had gone down into the back
] yard and hunted it up.n