Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1889-08-10
Saturday Smiles.

Precipitation never reigns but 1t pores
BRAKES Magazine.
Stranger in western town-"What is the
death rate2'
Native-'Nawthin', sir, at all Ye kin die fer
nawthin' at all. No rates here. It's terrible
high down ter Gulchville, hough."-Ld,crence
American.
The bosoms Of her sister states swell with
pleasure at the enormous cotton crops of
TRANSFORMER Journal.
Accepted Suitor-'won't you find it awkward
when you meet your other two husbands in
heaven?"
Interesting Widow-sT do not expect to meet
either of them there. Life.
Some men are born great, some men achieve
greatness and some can curve q ball. Chicago
Tribune.
This" said Mrs. Spriggins. sis the only
silk ever had that didn't wear o bit shiny,
and it's just a little shiny. "-Huper's Bazaar.
"Have you read The Mill on the Floss Miss
Susie?" he asked Of the Mississippi belle. mo,
/ haven't" she replied, CURLY. II think Gov.
Lowry was right, and wouldn't read about q
disgusting prize fight for anythingr'-
Register.
When you feel like calling big man q liar,
be sure you're right, then use the telephone
Life.
''Pat is that true that hear?"
can what's that, yer honor"
That you are going 70 marry again"
"That's 80, yer honor"
''But your first wife has only been dead q
week"
''Shpre she's as dead now as she liver will be,
yer honor."-Pick-Ms-U Up.
A bachelor who lives in Newark; N. J., and
who has always had fear that his little wife
might rule him, says now that Q new idea has
girl, because he can dictate to her.-Drake's
Magazine.
A Poets Dream.-Miss Gushley--"I 30 often
zee some one spoken Of as being beautiful as q
poets dream. Do you poets have more beau
tiful dreams than we common mortals?"
Mr.. A, Tennyson Fizzle-"I hardly know. ]
generally dream of porterhouse steaks, fried
chickens, and that sort Of thing. "-Te,re Haute
cypress.
1.-TWO negatives I've heard, sweet maid.
Make an affirmative.
An answer quickly give"
He pressed the tiny hand and eaxed
Upon the lovely miss.
APa said ho.sp ssss yGa p let NE Pss take
Those lips on which the rose You kissed
She sIu.hsd sAs s sishsS she e. hung her head.
Young wife-"You are not going out to-
night, are you?"
Husband-"Yes, my dear; must 90 back to
the office and post my books. I'm afraid I'll be
kept late"
7. W.-"Not going anywhere except to the
Officer"
H.-"No-o."
Y. W.-"well, then, step into Strong Smell 4
90. 3, around the corner from your Office, on
your way down. They'll be open until o'clock.
Get Q couple Of mackerel and bring them home
with you when you come"
H.-"Ye-es, my dear. Good night"
Y. W. Ito herself as her husband departs)-
''He won't do much thester-going with those
mackerel in his pocket "-Bosion Transcript.
A ballet girl syndicate is the latest develop
ment of the trust business. II will find itself
short on skirts when the season opena-Aon-
treal Gazette.
When you upon the sands would lie
And under her umbrella hide
Upon your rival keep one eye
But keep the other the tde-Lffs
The Chicago Limited. young
Briggs has taken partner for life, has hep
Fangle-"No, not-not exactly for life. he
married Chicago girl-TSme.
He-"How beautiful and poetic are some of
the old Indian words! Minnehaha, for instance,
or AlabamaI'
Ehe-''Yes, and Kissimee."
Which he did il he was any good-Lnusnos
American