Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1889-04-25

she is to have seat at my table"
my dear boy. cut your throat at
once with your scissors.
"Our funniest artist looks like
Hamlet = wonder what she'll look
like"
"Sharp as to bones as well as wit"
.Of uncertain age"
Zone of those clever, ugly faces"
"Why don't the old man put her
over in the corner with the fashion
editor"
because, 1 suppose" answers
Douglas, lit is intended that l should
aid her by handing over all the queer,
odd. funny, purely feminine items l
come across to her. And she'll be
here tomorrow"
$50 soon. puir, bonny Scot"
won't it be funny. though. to see
the old man bending gravely over
her, looking as though he were about
to deliver funeral Grafton. and bid
ding her in slow measured
tones to be funny?"
''Ten chances to one he'll brighten
all the fun out of her. We're used
to him, and don't exactly tremble
with fear at his frown, Ben Bolt"
said Douglas.
''But to stranger and a woman it
strikes me he'll seem-well, rather
ice-bergey."
The next morning, at nine o'clock
precisely. the editor-to-be of THE
Woman's Funny Department arrived.
She was not sharp as to bones. On
the contrary, she was plump enough to
make you forget she had bones. She
was not of an uncertain age. On the
contrary, she was not more than two
and-twenty. She had not clever,
ugly face. She had a clever, pretty
one, with the sauciest of tip-tilted
noses, the most mischievous of spark
ling gray eyes, the wickedest of tiny
white teeth. and the darkest of dark
auburn hair, arranged in puffs and
fiuffs, and curls and whirls in the most
bewildering and bewttchiug fashion.
A profound silence reigned behind
the doors, or rather the half-open doors
of the cubby holes or rabbit hutches
when she made her appearance.
As for the puir, bonny Scot he arose
hastily, upsetting the mucilage bottle
as he did so. and lifting pile of pa
pers and magazines from the chair she
was to occupy deity deposited them
on the crown of his brand-new hat
which lay on the table before him. In
a few moments the old man came in,
bowed to the funny woman in a cold
and formal way, introduced her to
Douglas as Miss Margery Burr, gave
her few directions in his time-isn't-
worth-any- thing voice and disappeared
in his sanctum.
Miss Margery Burr proved great
acquisition to the paper on which she
was engaged. Her witty articles were
quoted far and wide. and she edited the
witty articles of others in such skill
full manner that they were twice as
good when they left her hands as when
they came into it.
1.-The Woman's Funny Department
was a succeSS-a grand success. Miss
Burr knew it was, and she knew she
had made it one. No one appreciated
her more than she appreciated her.
self. Her own jokes amused her i'm
mensely, and she had a way, when
she had written something that struck
her as irresistibly droll. of bursting
into the jolliest of musical laughs. and
then reading il in clear, musical
voice to McGregor Douglas. And the
moment that laugh was heard, there
was nothing heard in that semi-circle
of cubby holes or rabbit hutches until
the point of the joke was reached.
Then various sounds of merriment es-
capped from them.
''Ha! ha! ha!''
He-he-he."
"Haw-haw!"
Good" etc, etc, etc.
The fourth time this performance
took place the sanctum door opened
slowly and the old man came quietly
out, but not SO quietly, however, but
that five or six pairs OF ears caught
the sound Of his footsteps and drowned
them at once in the loud scratching of
pens, at the same moment that Douglas
seized an illustration designed for a
transfer and shipped it in two with a
great appearance of interest in his
work. But did Miss Margery Burr
bend quickly over her writing? No.
sir. No. ma'am. She looked directly
at the old man, her long silken lashes
we'll uplifted from her mischief-full
gray eyes, and said: '.Oh. Mr.. Ender-
by. would you like to hear it. too?"
II shall be content to enjoy it at the
proper time, when it appears in
print" said that gentleman. with more
than usual sternness. and again with
drew.
But the very next day the excessive