Idaho semi-weekly world. [volume] (Idaho City, Idaho Territory) 1875-1908, 1889-03-08
OUT IN MISSOURI.
A Country where n stranger Can Gss AL
the Information He wants.

A stranger passing through iossun
Ridge met up with an old party driving
a yoke OF oxen, and stopped to inquire
the way to Beckett's mill. The old
party was native OF the Ridge-a tall,
-boned specimen, wearing pair OF
cotton overalls ''gallused" up almost
to his arms and lacking at least six
inches OF reaching his shoes.
Good morning, uncle. the stranger
said.
..Humph! What yer call me uncle
ferP" the native replied. II hain't no
uncle o. yourn. I'm ole Perry Jacks. "
Mr.. Jacks, can you direct me to
Beckett's millp"
II reckon / kin. I've been er-goin'
thar with err turn fer nigh sixty year,
an s'pose orter know Their way by
this time. Air yer goin' tharp"
Eyes, will you be kind enough to di-
rect mep"
"Sartinly, sartinly. What mout yer
name be, strangerP"
Smith"
"Yas; wal, thar use ter be or family
or Smiths Twin on ther Ridge. Ole
Bile an his boys. Yer didn't know
EN- | reckonP"
"No; never heard Of them"
Didn't? l lowed mebby yer he'd.
They wus burned onery cusses, let me
tell you. Wusn't with shootin', none
of 'eI. Ole Bile drunk hisself ter
deatA, an two of Their boys is gone up
fur boss stealin', an tothern wus hung
out west fer sumpun. You hain't none
o that set, jedge, though you do look
some like 'em. Whar mout yer hail
frump"
kansas City"
"Do ehp I've hearn right smart o.
that place. fust and last. Right peart
town, | reckon. I've been lynn off
or good bit ter go up thar, but Their ole
woman she stans' squar's out ergin it.
Say, by gum, yer never see sech er
burned critter as Their ole oman is.
She's contrairiener mule, an hes Their
dingedest temper yer ever see."
I'm very anxious to be going" the
stranger suggested
'In sums of er hurry, ehp S'pose
yer hev business with ole Beckett"
yes"
oval, yer go errcrost Their crick
down thar, an then sorter skin erlong
erroun' Their hill. Say. that's mon
strous poor Ian over thar. 1t b'longs
ter my wife's dad, an it amt wuth
shucks, but Their dinged ole fool paid
seventy-fve cents an acre fer it. l told
my wife that he didn't hev or lick er
sense. Wouldn't you say SO, tooP"
Certainly"
Then yer go on erroun' the ridge till
yer come to ther pore house. Say. I've
got two cousins in Their pore house.
You didn't know Uncle Bill, I reckonp'
, mo, never had that honor"
, "Humph, it wouldn't been no great
: honor, guess. But them two cousins
, over thar to the pore house was Uncle
Bills children. but they wusn't never
wuth shucks."
: "How do go from the poorhouseP
oval, yer kinder side erlong d'wn
ther hill TIL yer come ter my house.
You'll know my house when yer git
ulldty Al y lOtlSC d ICa oICCI tlCd u L
in Their lot, an see a pillar an other
traps stuffed in ther winder next to
ther road. Say, yer don't want ter buy
steer, do yerP He's er fine animal
an cheap at twenty dollars. He's
wuth forty"
: Il don't want him.
Don't Ell? I'd like ter sell i'm, feI
; he's er power er trouble an is fifteer
years old. could a traded i'm once fe,
: err jack-plane, but l wus too big ell
! burned fool ter do it. Wouldn't like
0 ter take i'm fer $2p"
., mo. Please go on"
oval, yer foller roun' Their new
groun' till yer come to or road leadin
off down ther crick to Beeson's place
Don't know Beeson, l reckon. Wal
II he's been squire now for goin' on TWEEN
ty year, an last week when he'd 81
, case efore him he went squar ergin me
u an that after I'd loant i'm my oxen te
s haul fodder with. What do yer thinl
of err Teller what'ud do that? Yo,
: wouldn't say he knowed much abou
law an jestice, would you? | mad,
him change his decision poorly quick
: though, after gin i'm q lickin'."
; ''How shall go from the squire'sp
: Yer don't go frum Their squire's e
tall. When yer come ter Their wal
leadin' ter Their squire's yer go straigh
on to Their schoolhous'. Say, ding N,
buttons eff they hain't gone an hire,
j ole Dock Perkins ter teach ergin. He
Their dingedest fool yer ever saw. AT
; the ole woman'll tell yer so eff yer sto
an ak err"
Pm willing to believe YOU"
'Air, ehg That's right. Now We
go on over by ther meetin' house wha
my uncle is building. Their durne
J. fool tuck Their job 'spectin' ter max
: $l5 outten it, but he won't make fiftee
cents, an /"
From the meeting house?"
"Jest quarter straight on to Beck
ett's. Say ole Beckett's Their durnded
J est--"-Detrott Free Press.
I
{ You should make love and trus
your motto" said q pious thong
{ seedy-looking man in a grocery, AZ h
n was picking out Goldfish PLENTY c
n love but no trust" returned the groce
! man who ,UoS m ~, .r,,..,l