The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1889-01-30
Press Notes.


rants the SKY with warming cOlOrS,
But where how to make blizzard
is a strange and unknown science.
What they know of building Billiards
is a thing that forces children
In the climate Of Dakota
Into wild and woody laughter.
True, they get a full-grown blizzard
But they let it go unmuzzled,
Let it go without a halter,
And 1t comes cavOrting northward,
Reyiving all the dead past issues,
With "rebel yell astounding:
Tearing mp the Yankee railways,
Smashing teegraphic systems,
Stopping mails on every highway,
Raising Cain in forty places
Coming northward from the southwark,
Getting worse as il advances:
While the blizzard from the northward,
Coming southwark from the northward,
Warmer gets as it advances
Therefore say we, now in earnest,
Not profane or too emphatic,
D the blizzard from the southwark,
Give us billiards from the nOrthward.
And " Amen say all the people -Er.
THE position of DR.. McGlynn re-
minds us of story: Corporal, you're
out of step" said a sergeant. Wrong
again." responded the corporal. Pm
the only man of the regiment in
step."-Ne,o York Herald.
IT isn't the war with Germany we
mind so much, but the names of those
Samoan celebrities that look like "pi "
when set in type and sound like pho
nograph with a bad cold when pro-
nounced. Charleston World.
HEALTH journals insist upon repos-
ing on the right side only, and claim
that it is injurious to lie on both sides;
but we don't know where they will find
a notwithstanding SCI of men than
lawyers. -Sdlem (OregonO Statesman.
"HAvE you hammered brass?" in
quired lady in st. Paul art store.
" Yes'm," remarked the clerk, briskly;
d" l pounded a Chicago drummer once
until he didn't know whether he was
in Minnesota or three miles below
Memphis. St Paul Pioneer Press.
If Phelps of New Jersey succeeds
Phelps of Vermont at the court of st.
James it will be great saving in the
matter of door-plates. This ought to
give Willy Wally the inside track if we
are going to have really and truly
economical administration. - Boston
Herald.
\ YOUNG man in Elizabeth hung
himself with new silk handkerchief
Just because " his best girl =" concluded
to marry the other fellow. Too bad to
waste good handkerchief in that reck-
less way 1t would have been cheaper
if he had bought clothes-lne and had
it charged to him. But this is not an
economic age.--Ne,o York Herald.
\ MIDDLE-AGED woman went to a
prominent physician of San Diego, not
long ago, and asked him to amputate
her two great toes. He examined
them, assured her that there was moth
ing wrong with them, and said that he
wouldn't cut them off. She begged
him to, saying that if they were off she
could wear "number twon shoes in
stead of tours, as then. Her toes were
her own, she said, to do what she
pleased with, and she would give $500
to have them off The doctor refused
and the woman went in quest of some
one with less conscience. A San Diego
newspaper says that she found some
one to do the job successfully. for two
weeks later she went to San Francisco
wearing the best pair of number twos
that could be bought in San Diego.
ACCORDING to correspondent of
~ COZ tttt' ')ttU lilC uSCb DOuuu
region is in one respect an American
Ireland He says: "When arrived on
Puget Sound was infCl med that there
were neither poisonous serpents, in
sects nor plants on the shores or islands
of the Sound. Having never seen a
place entirely devoid Of poisonous ami
NAL or vegetable life, l was rather in
clined to doubt the assertion, though
assured by many old settlers, is well as
new, that such was the case. However,
careful investigation since then has
convinced me that it is true. In all my
hunting and fishing expeditions l have
never seen specimen of poisonous
reptile, insect or plant. | notice an en-
tire absence of poison oak or ivy, which
have heretofore encountered wherever
| have been. AS far as | can learn
what | have said in regard to Puget
Sound also holds true of all the country
lying west of the Cascade range
Mr.. BLAINE and his family are said
to be about TO settle here for the winter
whatever that may mean-and there are
people who must see a meaning in
everything before they can rest. Cos.
sips say that Mrs. Blaine and Mrs. Har.
rison have a mutual dislike to each
other which will actually prevent Mr.
Blaine from taking part in the future
administration as a cabinet officer
This can hardly be true. Men do moi
allow the preferences of women to af
feet them in that field which they con,
slider peculiarly their own-politics. But
Mrs. Blaine can make a keen answer
there is no doubt of that. When they
were living here some lady heard thai
the cook who was at the Blaines' was
an unusually good one. The lady hat
an ambition TO possess one herself, tha
she might give good dinners, and she
promptly went round, rang the bel
at the front door, asked to see Mrs
Blaine's cook and offered her higher
wages than she was then receiving
Afterward this lady and Mrs. Blaine me
at dinner. The lady was introduced
was sugary in her manner, mentioned
her own name, to make sure Mrs. Blain,
should remember it, and was making
pleasant speeches of all sorts, whel
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