Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1889-05-31
A kiss is a sort of water cross.

A kiss is n sort of water 'crGss.
All commercial travellers nrc Journey
men.
Tho cry of II sick dog is n bark in dis.
trcss.
The most conscientious mechanics have
their little viscs.
Giants are the fellows to carry Things
with high hand.
Tho omnibus horse always enjoys tho
luxury of WHOM. - Hos,on Gavettc.
The popularity about IL rising death
rate is TINT IL brings people down.
Can you call II man chopping ice
water crnckcr?-P iitsLu,y Chronicle
Man gels but little here below DER
which to make much of crow. Bis
sard.
The most unpleasant constellation to
SEQ of winters night is the CRATE baro.
-Iiaypfr's Basor
Beside tho door mats at tho Whites
House, diplomats arc often seen thcro.-
fittsb,tsv Mronicle.
Tho average man mover knows whit
pm ing the piper means until he scttlcs
his first plumbing bill
Naturally enough person who has
been elected from place OF public meet
ing feels put out. -DJtrob Free Press.
There is n cheerful ring in an engaged
girls laughter, and also on her finger, IL
II Is n thrce.carat diamond. -Mw York
M6os.
Six feet four inches is tho stature of
tho new British Minister He is tall
enough to DO addrcsscda s Ills IIighness.
--IfttsJuug Chronicle.
The physician makes his money by
piacticing. When he has become 10
slillful that he doesn't have to practice
then he rctires. --Boston Transcript.
The gedlte sprdg has CODE ngaid,
Stord widters reigd Is eldod;
Tho robid dote I'd suddy gled
With childred's song is bleddcd.
-Bm6aio Courier.
81 was badly bitten by flies in every
country in Europe except Belgium"
"Havo they none therc7" 81 don't
know. 1 didn't go there. "-MDper's
Ba,ar.
Proprietor Second class lodging
house -"Will you show these peobie
thor 'bunks.'" New Clorls--"Oh, yes;
l used to be 'bunko stecror ~
GrUphic.
How will the new Electrical Execu- !.
tion law get over the revolving scenes Of
executions when the revolving details
arc carried out ut 300 volts per execu-.
tion2-LVc.
GLOW are those hour glasses? Do they
work easily" "Oh, my! yes This ono
is particularly good. ran through in
less than fifty minutes yesterday. "-NaiL
and Erpress.
l.op Il O
o'clock T.. NJ, and another leave New
York at 8 O'Clock r. NJ. on the same day,
how soon will they dine together in
Montreal2-LiJc.
The proprietor of sausage factory
announces that "parties sending their
own flesh to- be chopped will find their
orders attended to with punctuality and
dispatch. "-MeD York Neos.
THU MoMENroUs QUESTION.
From Ash Wednesday to Easter
She ponders upon It;
While he scrapes around
To raise cash for that bennett
Puck.
A man fails in business for $40, 900.
His creditors levy upon his assets and
obtain $1,000 in settlement of their
claims. How much does his wife make
by the transactiop2 Answer, sig, 900.
LIE.
eff put my money into the savings
bank" said Pat. "when can I draw it
out again" "Oh," answered his fellow
countryman, ''if you put it in to-day
you can get it out tomorrow by giving
fortnight's notice"
Badness EXPLAINED.
"Grandpa, what made You SO baldi" the child
Asked as she sat on the old mans knee;
And the old man, rubbing his shining poll
With this answer the wee one beguiled:
The years rolling over our heads, you see,
Rub Off all the hair as they roll"
-NeU York Herald.
Wherein Her Success Lay.-Mother
to daughter)- understand, my deaS
that yo.l made quito an impression at
the CONVERSE lone the other evening""
,aughter-"Yes, mamma" Mother
what sub ect did you discusstn
Daughter-'I didn't discuss anything.
mamma; let Others do the Discuss
g."-Rarpsi'S Magasir-