Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1889-03-15
MAD, BUT NOT CRAZY.
Actual Experience of a Drummer
Faithfully Recounted.

Actual Experience of Drumme
Faithfully Recounted.
On the platform of little station
which has been known rs Shandee
over since old Mr.. Shandees, in ex
change for the glory OF the name gave
the railroad company right of way
through his farm, was an animated
scene on the date of this narrative
which was not so very long ago. A
choleric traveller, rcd-faced and per
spring, stormed md swore, fumed ant
fretted, and did nearly every thing hs
could to make visible display OF dis
gust and disappointment. Had he been
woman this traveller could have sim
pliiied matters and saved much veal
and tear to his mental and physical or
ganization by sitting down in heap
and taking n good, long cry.
As he was not woman, and he
wouldn't cry, he did the natural thing
for most men to do-he swore. He
poured maledictions upon the rapidly
vanishing north-bound train. which he
had winded himself in striving to catch;
he poured confusion and dismay upon
the heads of the railroad officials, the
train men, who luckily wore out OF
hearing, and the station agent, who un-
fortunately was not and, moreover,
was too small n man in stature TO resent
the teft-handed blessings.
As the hired representative of COR
poration, he meelsly received the col
lective remarks, as he is paid to do.
The station agents most onerous duty
is to serve as target for general com.
plants against the company.
The reader has probably surmised
that this traveller was cleft" He had
called on customer of his in the little
village, taken small order for goods,
and hoped to catch the next train
home. He missed it by fifteen seconds,
and in his chagrin he gave himself the
best possible opportunity for bursting
blood vessel or dropping in an attack
of npoplexy, and thus permitting his
wife TO realize on his life insurance.
There is ne mistaking the fact that
he wss in frame of mind.
To some people death is almost pref
cradle to long enforced stav in n little
cross roads hamlet, where there are no
hotol accommodations or any thing else
provided for non-residents, and it was
nearly so with Lemurl L. Lemuels, OF
the firm OF Todde, Rodde & Co., who
on this particular Saturday evening
found himself stranded in the woods,
two hours ride from home, and no
way of encompassing the intervening
distance.
Saturday night too, remember, and
no more trains until Monday morning.
His fits of agitation revived at every
thought of his direful situation.
When Lemuels was so fatigued that
he could swear no more at the cloud of
smoke which remained in sight after
the train had disappeared, he came to
his senses and endeavored to be reason
able.
"In the love of Heaven" said he to
the station agent who was also operator
and other functionaries in one, sis there
any way can get away from here? Any
where, anywhere is better than this"
mo more trains north till Monday
morning"
ANY southP"
"Sunday night, eleven forty-three.
Lemuels groaned.
"No freights?n
"North-bound freight tomorrow
afternoon, 6:50."
when does it reach Toledo?"
'Monday morning, 2:20."
Another longer groan, Then some
more Saledictions on his i'll luck.
The operator had heard call on his
instrument, and at this juncture went
to receive dispatch. When he came
out again he called to man who was
near by to go and see that the south
switch was all right, as he had received
orders to look out for special.
"a special trainn' almost yelled the
travelling man. (which way is it go
ing?"
"NoIth."
= Saved! savedl" tragically exclaimed
Lemuels.
1t won't do you any good, though" I"
said the operator; 'it's train load OF
crazy people going to the asylum at To-
ledo, and no sane passengers will be
taken on"
"Ye gods am crazy enough to ride
with that crowd"
You're pretty crazy, but don't be-
lieye the conductor will let you ride"
Thoughts crowded thick and fast
through the mans brain. Should he
remain here in this clearing over Sun
day, or should he make bold stroke
for libertyP
"Will the train stop here?n he asked.
''Not at the station, but 1t will have
TO stop this side OF the crossing up
there; but they won't let you ride; you
can count on that
my friend. am desperate. Rather
than stay in this hole in the woods
would agree TO live with maniacs q
month. You check my grip so II
will follow me on the Monday train, and
I'll go TO Toledo tonight with tbs
crHzios.h
The trVpeler was really desperate
enough TO bravo almost any thing 10 the
endeavor TO reach home. The train
stopped exactly at the point where he
was awaiting II in hiding, Ho had
hastily tom off his standing collar,