The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1889-12-03
BREAKFAST BUDGET.
Oiall the evils heTu below
There's nothing we may scan,
That SlckeuS like the mAnuikh girl,
OF WOFsn-thD VifllRh man.

ofas "the best dressed man in Washing
ton"
Was II a mean editor that headed the
account OF a death from deliFlum tremens
Spirited AWayP"
Bootblack-shiRe, sir2 surly Citizen
mo, What do | want with q shine
Boolblack-I fought perhaps yer was q
gentleman,
Emperor William Of Germany has au,
thorIxed the establishment Ola lottery
10 raise funds for building q monument
to his grandfather.
Robert Browning and Lord Tenuyson
will publish new volumes OF poems De-
cember l9. Boston booksellers are look,
Ing forward to large Christmas trade,
When you see young man and a
young woman swapping chewing gum
In q horse car you may make up your
mind that abe hasn't promised to DO a
sister to him,
Nine. de Valsayre, the champion
woman's rights woman OF France, has
retired from the French Women's League
because the latter resolved that men
shall be excluded from their assemblies
Mr.. John Fl, starin, who some time
ago pledged the steamboat interests for a
subscription OF 100000 to the New York
Worlds Fair fund, has compromised
with his conscience by personally sub
scribing 500.
The following novel advertisement ap.
pears In the Salem (Iowa) Special III
John Jones, who, twenty years ago, de-
serted his wife and babe, will return,
said babe will lick the stuiIin' out OF
him."-Akron Weekly Tribune.
Col. Robert G. IngersOll has accepted
the invitation OF the New York State
Bar Association to deliver the annual nd.
dress before the association in the As.
sembly Chamber Of the Capitol January
10 Ills subject will be "fhe Imperfec.
tons Of tue Common Law"
John B. Allen, the Senator.eIect from
the State Of Washington, will be tn,
youngest looking man In the upper
house OF Congress. He has blonde hair
and rosy cheeks aud the extremely
youthful appearance that accompanies
that complexion into middle life.
Senator Ingalls," says the Achison
Globe, drove through tho streets last
evening Ia rusty spring wagon, u lot
Of hickory poles sticking out behind. II
Ia a part OF the United States Senator's
duty 10 look tough occasionally when he
is Ia the wild aud woolly West"
Bobby-Say, Mister, have you rented
your rooms YETI Elder slster-Hush,
Bobby, you mustn't be SO familiar. Mr..
Soitpale-Oh, let me anuse him. am
very fond oil little boys. What rooms
my little man? Bobby-I dunno; but
sis said tho other day that you had
rooms to let In your upper story, and
Ameritd.
Young Mother-Don't you think baby
IL pretty? Bachelor UnCle-Yery, In
fact, quite above tho average. Young
Mother-And he's so intelligent, you
have no idea. Bachelor Uncle-Really
I'm no judge oil such things; but will
admit that never cav q baby hiCcough
with greater intelligence than yours
AmeTicd.
Mr.. John II. Thomas, one OF the Ohio
Democratic milliouaires who wants to 20
to the United States Seunte, will never
get there II ie sticks to his announced
platform. He says: at | could have
The last vote necessary 10 insure my sue
cess for twenty-five cents, | would not
pHy the twenty-five cents" Mr.. Calvin
) BriCe isn't built that way.
Mr. Charles A. Dana, who has been
spending ten weeks In roaming through
Spain, las takentlie rather curious whim
oi returning thereirom by way Of the
Italian steamers. These vessels are
stGunch enough, but they are not fitted
up with comforts, and their passengers
are not VI the kind usually with whom
Mr., Dana would be likely to find con.
genial associates.
Prince Albert Victor Of Wales has from
the Hst regarded his Indian trip with
the most gloomy torebollDge, and gen.
eral impression prevails In England That
he will never return alive. The news,
therefore, that Oh his arrival In Bombay
the elephant on which he was riding
stumbled and fell, and that ut q later
hour GU the same afternoon the horses
which he was driving boltOd and
smashed his carriage to pieces has been
received with much uneasiuess in Lon.
don.