Morning journal and courier., 1889-03-01
MUCH.

A great many girls say mo" at first; but, like the photographer, they know how to re- touch their negatives.-Puok. Playing cards were originally square. Per- haps card playing was also; but let us not be too credulous.-Boston Transcript.
 A good many accidents happen with guns that are not loaded because the people who handle them unfortunately are.-Somerville Journal.
 A Rochester man celebrated Washington's birthday by putting an egg under his hen and telling her to hatchet.-Rochester Post-Express.
 It is not always safe to judge from appear ances, but it is pretty safe to judge from dis appearances, at least in the case of defaulters Boston Courier.
 A kiss is said to be something which ''comes by male but never by post" This is an error; we have often known kisses to come by the gate post.-Glens Falls Repub- lican.
 The locomotive is no coward but it will run at moments notice, it will back out of 8 tight place in hurry, and it takes water whenever it gets chance. Washington Critic.
 Joaquin Miller is said to write for passtime only, and he will not accept money for any of his productions. That shows both Joa.- quins good sense and that he estimates fairly the value of his oductions.-Somerville Journal.
 Miss oftenlong of New Jersey-"What is the cost of a marriage license in this State, Mrs. Gottherea" Mrs. Gotthere-'Just $1." Miss Oftenlong-"My goodness! One would think the men couldn't resist such bar gain. n."-Burlington Free Press.
 Measuring by the eye-Yaung Lady-'I want a pair of shoes, large and comfortable. Two will do." New boy (glancing at her, f1ot-Mr Leather the lady wS.aa wants two two box of sixes?"-New York Weekly.
 A Powder Magazine.-First New Yorker "I'm in favor of war with Germany right off," Second New Yorker-"Yes, I own some stock in the Century Magazine, and it has about used up the last war. Yes, sir; what this country needs is another war; Texas Siftings.
 Mrs. De Culture-Forrors! Going to mar ry that young MT. Hayseed: Are you cra- zya He eats pie with knife. him.
 You'll die of disgust.
 No, won't. I'll never have pie.-Phila- delphia Record.
 Indignant wife (appearing suddenly in re- freshment bazar near theater)-So here is where you have to find that man, is it? I'd like to see the man. Is he here?
 husDauu iieoOiy)- os, AiJ Ooah' 1Ao1o he is. Points to his own reflection in the mirror back of bar.) Will you join him. Whatl it be, my loye?-Chicago Tribune.
 Mamma was explaining to the children the creation of the first man, and told them that God made Adam out of the dust of the earth. All during the story 4-year-old Maud was attending with deep concern, and when mamma had finished she said: "Now, that won't do, mamma, 'cause if God had made him out of mud, when he got dry he would all peel of. ."-New York World.
 A near relative of Mrs Burlington is liv- ing among the "mountings" within forty miles of New York city. Not long ago there was some complaint about the young people lettering about the church, and she said, with sigh: "Wel1, I never did like to see young folks standing in the Sebastapool of the church." Again, speaking of neighbor whose house was well furnished, she said: "You'd orter see what lots of goblers she's got on her buffalo" She meant goblets on buffet.-Christian Advocate.