The Mason County journal. [volume] (Shelton, W.T.) 1886-1927, 1889-05-31
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS

1t Is the man who is neither lust
nor generous, who is most apt in the
use OF the phrase, BE just before YOU
are generous. Boston Courier.
"A young physician was showing a
friend recent purchase that he had
made In the way of skeleton. .Verv
interesting" commented his friend
''One OF your patients, doctorp" -Life
What does it profit man to get a
modern society novel for twenty-five
cents, if he has to buy an unabridged
dictionary and an encyclopedia before
ne can understand it? - Shoe and
Leather Reporter.
-Skribler-''Have you read my new
novel, "A Story Without a Hero?'"
Carper-"Yes. think it misnamed
however. Any man who reads it clear
through proves himself a hero.''-
Terre Haute Express.
"A lawyer, entering the Office of his
family physician, said, in a hoarse
whisper: Doctor, I've got such cold
this morning that 1 can't speak the
truth" 'Tm glad that it isn't any,
thing that will interfere with YOUR
business" responded the doctor in
tone of sympathy.
-Hobbs-'I understand that Doh
sons wife is a German, and that he
mastered the German language to win
her." Jones-"Well, he must have
expended all his energies on the Ian
guage, then. He has never mastered
her. Huntington Free Press.
About ninety per cent. of all the
men who start out in business fail be-
fore they get through, and there is q
dlsheartening suspicion in some quar-
tiers that it is about what forty per
cent. of them set out to do.-Somer-
vile Journal.
Familiar Fellow (tapping digni-
fed old gentleman on the shoulder)-
"Aln't my face familiar to your" Old
Gentleman brushing him off)-.It's
not alone your face that's familiar.
You are altogether the most familiar
man l ever saw. Texas Siftings.
-"Pshaw," said lady to her hus-
band, who had been criticising her at
tire. "what does a man know about
woman's clothes, anyway" HE knows
the price, my DEAR" he replied, gently,
and she retired. Washington Critic.
Mrs. Gibson-''How did your hus-
band make his money, Mrs. Bankstock?
L remember when you were living
Giving in the hall bedroom of cheap
clearinghouse, as you are living now,
l presume you mean?" swell, you
needn't get touchy. Honest people
don't get rich as fast as some folks l
might mention. Chicago Herald.
Men who live by their wits, who
proclaim no definite occupation, but
who are said to speculate, are the
outcasts usually of some profession in
which, had their talents been properly
applied, they might perchance have
won a respectable position, or even
fame. They leave the straight and cor
rect path, and with strange ups and
downs try to reach the goal Of success
by the insane process of seeking it
through blind and devious ways.
mo girl under twenty" says
wise woman ''has any business to
think of marriage" Bless you, no. We
know that At that age no girl thinks
of marriage as business. She just
tumh1aS head Ove, hoalc in 1ovo and
marries the dear fellow just because
she would cry her eyes out without
him. 1t is when she is no longer what
you would exactly call a girl" when
she is rising thirty-eight and has cut
her last new teeth, full set, that she be-
gins to make business" of it.-Buf-
falO Express.