New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1889-10-23

" TNg NN4G1
When men get on tights they
can barely keep their legs.
Aaaan is not necessarily mean be
cause he will jumpton "a feather bed
whezl it is down.
a=ike many a y5t1rg man, matare
begins her fail by painting things
rsd.
New York is aGsssv5sng as muchssroub-
ae in finding fair site as Rennsyl
@vania had in dosing a dam site.
The boy wlossnas bent on eating a
green watermelon was in She same
condition after he had eaten it.
Sour A LA ,LY Geszs-=s2zz - =:
stock, six tinfes az Hesa sss: 1.:,.~ "a
then put i'm 1.-THE lamb.-Iksst
We wish to state onerairy Sa4>1
busted dam 1has nothing to do with
a broken seath.-Terre Haute Ex-
press.
How hard it wouldibe for a great
man whois<d dead to come to life again
and liveup to his memorials and
obituary addresses.
The wem an who carries her hand
kerchiefansher corsage should remen-
Der the fate of the snan in the fable
who warmed wiper in his BOSOM
The man who feels around in the
dark feursa door, and gets an arm
on each side of it, occupied the time
of a recording angel for fully five
minutes. -.. ~.
Have you teltElippers?" inquired
an cid Nady in 6 shoe store 1.-THE
clerk, who was new at the business
and young, answered, Eyes, npa'am,
many a time.'
"'There,' said the new lady of the
castle, s'Aare the graves of the former
ownez'?s ancestors. My ancestors"
she added, proudly, ''are all diving"
-H@rper's Magazine.
Bromn-See here, teamster, Itaon't
Want Weu to bring gravel and clay
and 'bowlders to fillup this lawnwith.
Teansber-What tn dickens does yer
want, then? ,Brown-Oh, nattling
but the earth.
She'll do like to read Huwells."
Extraordinarily like to know
why 't'You don't have to go to
any treuble to dock for your place.
You can beginisin the middle 4or at
either 'eand andgit is all the same
Mother "You have drawn sthat
donheyvyery nicely, johnny, but you
have forgottenp one thing. Where is
the tail?' Johnny-"Oh, tthat
donkey I'd osn tineed any tail. There
are mo flies on him.
':Mamna, SAID Tommy, as he
watched his little brother squira1ing
in the balh-tub,- "Willie is like apiece
Of flannel - "What makes you think
so?" asked: hiss n2other. ssOh, be-
cause he,shrinks when he's washed"
Teacher" IF yoa had three oranges
and ate upE J, how many would be
left?'' Scholar Observation-Disclosures"
Teacher-esYes, one would be left.
Scholar Gdoggedly)-"No, it WOULDN'T t
"I'd eat THAT too''
That new fashioned contributiea-
box which registers the value of the
coin dropped into it and announces
ITS value by u peculiar ring of a gong
toeing the invention of one poss-
.essed by a devil or txyo, will never
ice popular in. our churches.
"They tenane you are going away.s
& Res; I'm going to publish y newe
paper in Kentucky.'' Have ~
purchased your type and press and
$50 on?" "No, but I've just bought
an elegant Manchester rifle. Wash
ington Capital.
t@Ed lady (on ahe limited "Does
the train stop for refreshments at
Canesawagy?' Raster-sY Yes, ma am.
Shall 4 telegraph an order ahead for
yon?'' Old lady-.f;Oh, no. ave got
IuaAE here in nay bag, and l lest
wanted to know when I'd have a
chancesSo eat it,
81 Twill bet yoL q new hat" said a
gentlemen, that yonyHill coined Town
out Of THAT chair before ask YOU
twice ,.Doner' replied his friend.
Come doWn,' cried ahe other. 81
will not. -said his friead, with much
obstinaeg, Then stop oil ask YOU
a second time, " said the sother. Per
thatFhe never would be asked
q coo0nH fSano + ho xroY,f Lore -, IL.