Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-12-23
THE ARIZONA KICKER.
The Editorial Burtiens witch Genius

The Editorial burdens witch a Genius Of
the Press Has to Rear Gracefully.
We extract the following items from the
last issue Of The Arizona Kicker.
THEY WILL Know MoRE- combine.
ton, calling itself the Acme Opera company
OF Chicago, gave show OF some sort at
Reynolds hall last Friday night No free
tickets were sent TO this office, aud when we
sent our half breed roller boy over 10 the
manager with a note asking him why In
Texas he had neglected such an important
duty, he returned word that The Kicker
could kick and be hanged to it, We there
fore kicked. We hired Cooper's hall for the
same night, gave free dance and the Acme
Opera company opened to an audience COM
posed OF the landlords cross eyed boy and
two old half breeds who thought somebody
was going 70 be scalped.
There's nothing mean about us. We sim
ply want what is due 70 the profession. and
what has been granted It from time imme
mortal When an amusement combination
sets out TO ignore US and make us sing small,
somebody will certainly hear something drop
before getting TO the top of the hill.
NOT SAYING a WoRD.-Many Of our sub
scribers are asking why The Kicker has moth
ing TO say In favor of either OF the local tick.
reasons
First, because we we're not nominated on
either ticket; and, scondly, because a bigger
gang OF rascals were never up for Office. We
wanted TO run for mayor. IL is no use being
over modest about such things We are bet
ter fitted for the position than any other man
In town. The Office should have been glad 10
seek us IL didn't do ~, and 80 we sought IL
Weshould have filed the position with credit
70 all, but the gangs wanted a tool. and so
they nominated Doc Burrows and Hank
Jones 20 head tho two tickets. Neither OF
these men will ever serve Within one month
we will have both Of them back at Joliet To
serve out their unexpired sentences
We have been warn that we must coma
out and support one tIc.et or the other. or 20
70 the wall Begin your wall business, gen
uemen, ms soon rs you please When you
down US you have got 70 beat grand aggre-
CATION OF newspaper. grocery, feed store.
harness shop, butcher shop and knitting fac
tory, all under one roof, presided over by one
head, aud each doing tine business
Nor Jusr NEr.-The Tom Cat Silver
Mining company sent US a certificate of stock
of the face value Of $500 last week and asked
US 70 editorially merton tho fact that the
mine would prove one OF the greatest bonan.
zas OF the aye for investors We can't con-
sctentiously do IL yet We want 10 walt
awhile and see whether we are % be assessed
on the stock or not, and we'd like to hear Of
some one who has received "A dividend We
used 20 take everything in silver stock that
came along, and puff up their old swindles
without stint. but we have made "A change of
base In this respect We found that a com
pany which would beat the public would also
beat US
THEY Took EXCEPTION Tall Bill. OF the |
Gem Saloon, Ohio George. of the Arcade
Poker Rooms, and Lovely Jim, OF the Red |
Front Sink OF lniquity, took exception TO our |
Kindly remark in last weeks issue that whisky |
Ind poker were trying 10 run the town, and |
hey laid for us accordingly. TN Friday AT.
ernoon We were examining the carcass OF n
'ig tackass rabbit killed over In the gulch by
sam Andrews, and on exhibition in front OF |
)avises' butcher shop, when the three worth.
rs above named approached and signified
heir intention Of cooking our goose We
lad them covered by our gun in five seconds.
nd We held them in line with hands nm for
ull five minutes rs an exhibition. When
hey had been disarmed we allowed them to
neak away
We don't claim to own this town and we |
ever set out 20 run it, but we propose to
ak In plain English ON all subjects and
uard the public interests 10 the best of our
buity. II the three parties named do not |
Inside at once, we shall encourage a crowd
, turn out with rope some frosty evening
nd pull their heads chock up against a limb
HE STILL LIVES "A Nebraska subscriber
rites to inquire II there is any other weekly
lblished in this burg There Is. We have
chattel mortgage on everything but the
d headed, cross eyed, lop shouldered coyote
no edits 1t, and can close him I'D at any
mute; but we let him run on In order to
'ep him of the town We rather like his
ldacity US well. He prints $50 copies, none
which can be read on account Of the Door
ess work, and yet he claims the largest cir
lation in the known world. He knows we
IN the very chair he sits in, but yet he de-
ties four columns each week to abusing liz
rsonally.
les, he still lives, poor old unfortunate c
It We are going to give him rope for the
inter. IL he was bounced out he might
We to run for the Legislature. Free .