, 1889-01-20

onions before coming to tho theatre to-nightTH
why, no, Miss Clara, l hadn't until you
spoke.n-The Epoch.
REvERlEs OF A PHILOSOPHER.
Naught the lovers ardor damps
When his girl has got the stamps.
Lay fgures-the price of eggs
They're having now their breathing time.
But they're determined, all,
Whatever the result may be,
Next year they will play ball
When n man, who greatly admires a beau
tful woman, makes her a profound bow, is
he, as one might say, counting her on the
stoopf -
'Is marriage a failuref'' the bachelor cried.
And the youth who Is counting a girl replied;
I've never been married. and cannot guess,
But courtship, 1 know. is a big success"
There Is usually a good deal of back talk
when women get together to discuss the
hustle. -
Whether the play is bright or fat,
To him It Is never known
Who stares at the back of a lady's hat
And swears, as the acts go on
When a woman wants the earth, It is with
the view Of giving it to some man.
Love is stronger thnn friendship, SO
The poets declare, and perhaps they know;
Yet we find, as the world we travel through,
Tint lovers are plenty and friends are few.
Good looks should not be despised- There
have been few heroes with turn up noses and
bow legs. -
How wise are - when the chance has hed,
And a glanc6 We backward casti
We know just tbs thing that we should have said
When the TIM for saying it's past.
TIL man who is In the habit of getting
pretty well on" lessons his chance of getting
to be pretty well off,"
The coal is now put In the bin
And the coal man rakes the shekels in;
But the wind blows keenly DER the world,
And the world Is cold, the world Is coldi
A paper devoted to plumbers is called The
Rasp. The craft will probably keep it on file.
Not, 'Ts It cold enough for your
The phrase of which oil have grown weary
But have you read Robert Elsmera
Is now the popular query.
female lawyer may be a spinster and have
objections to marriage, but when she accepts
n retaining fee she tacitly admits that she is
engaged. -
In black december, raw days, fog days
Follow close each other;
But 1t is only in the dog days"
That we have 'beastly weather"
-
"The same" is said to be the most popular
drink In the market.
We strive and strive to reach a place above:
We're not content with what we see and know;
The man who wins n loving wonan's love
has got a glimpse of heaven here belowi
tGTba FiSbaru Oro.tIa,r c. -. -.
got any baitf -
This is about the time when the farmer
fishes through the ice and catches n twenty
two pound pickereL
Sign painters should be comprehended
under the denomination of "Men OF letters, n.
and, by the way, so should letter carriers.
Brown-Green is a very intellectual man.
what they call a man of largo grasp.
Blnck-A man of large graspl 1 should
think he was Why, when he dances in a
waltz he can put his arms around .'the
whirled.n -
Young wife-My love, I have a delightful
surprise in store for you'll You cannot guess
what 1t is.
Young Husband full of pleasant anticipa-
tions)-What is it, dariingg
Y. W.-l've invited mother to spend the
holidays with US.
Young Wife-How the world movesl
There's Bessie Gray, an old chum of mine, a
graduate of the normal school,, has just en-
tered a medical college. She will soon be
able to write M D.. after her name. Women
are coming to the front, I tell you. For
merly girls were taught nothing but house
keeping.
Young ~Husband-Yes, and now they're
taught everything but housekeeping.
Where are you going to- my pretty maidY
I'm going to the dry goods store, she said
May / go with you, my pretty maidi
You may II you'h walt outside, she said
How long shall 1 wait for you. my pretty maidi
Until | look over the samples, she said.
And how many samples, my pretty maidi
Some of calico, some of silk, some of piQue,
some of linen, some of lawn, some OF velvet
ribbons, trimmings, buttons, gloves, laces,
embroideries-
Icannot go with you. he xioomily said
Boston Courier.