davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Irish standard., 1889-03-16
WHAT WE OWE THE FARMER.

II every farmer stayed his hand
And said: II will not till my land.
will not SOW the golden grain
Nor plant one seed upon the plain"
What should we do!
Where would our cities be to-day,
With all their ponp and rich display.
Without the gifts of farm and field
The fertile meadows generous yield3
What should we do?
How hard he works from day to day
To till the soil, to make the hay,
The fruits of earth to gather in
To store for you the barn and bin
Just think ofthisl
Tho frost NAV come and spoil his crop,
The pour ng rain his roots may rot,
The drouth may parch and spoil his grain
Q grudge I'M not his hard-won gain,
just think of This
- Moro "
The Irish standard., 1889-03-16
Don't Bay English Trunks.

People who pay s45 or $50 for an English
trunk ON the other side OF the water and
bring it over here under the impression
that it will ENJOY immunity from, the bag
gage smashers are wofully mistaken. q
81 American trunk is worth any $50 En-
glish trunk that ever Was made, that is, SO
far as travel in this country is concerned.
The leather trunks are not made Sc as to
withstand the baggage-smashng procliys
tiles in vogue on our roads. though they ARG
admirable for European travel,
The Irish standard., 1889-03-16
Found in Human Skin.

The Athen@um, library, Bury st. Ed
munds, has biography Of man named
Coraer which Is bound in . piece OF human
skin. Corder murdered his sweetheart and
married some one more to his liking. Hav-
ing been detected and hanged, the doctor
who obtained his corpse sent . piece OF his
skin, properly cured, to tho publisher, and
s copy Of the dead mans lie was accord
tn6ly bound up in his s1in.
The Irish standard., 1889-03-16
AN ARTFuL DODGE.

How Two Strangers Made Enough Money
to PAY for Their Next Meal.
A seedy-looking mau entered an uptown
bar-room the other evening, says Mr..
Grundy. In his hand he carried hand
some Malacca walking-cane, with heavy
oxidized silver head. "Excuse me, gentle
men," he said, as he approached number
Of well-dressed men standing at the
bar, "but do any Of you wish to
buy fine stick! This is remnant of
other days, when L was happy and rich,"
and he choked down a huge sob. II
wouldn't think of selling this little relic if
wasn't in need of bread. The pawn broker
around the corner offered me fifty cents on
it, but that isn't enough for my immediate
wants. Perhaps one Of you gentlemen
would like to have it for two dollars and
half?'
The cane was handed around, aud man
who seemed interested in the unfortunate
bought it from him for two dollars.
While the men were discussing the bar
gain their friend had made a stranger en-
tered He was of fine appearance, gentle
manly bearing, and looked, like 8 wealthy
clubman. After taking drink he walked
up and down the room few times. At
last, as he casually approached the group
at the bar he suddenly started back, then
hurried forward and grasped the cane.
s'Why, why" he calculated, IN surprise,
II never thought should see this again."
The man who had just bought the cane
turned around in amazement when he saw
the stranger lay hands on his property
s'What do you mean, sir}" said he; "that's
my stick.'
''You must be laboring under deluslon,
my dear SIR replied the courteous stranger
in a wonderfully suave tone of voice. II
would know this cane in q thousand and
couldn't be mistaken. My friend, Tom Ochil-
tree, brought it from London the last time
he was there and presented it to me- l
wouldn't have lost it for all the world. l can
prove it is my property, for by touching
this spring the head opens and discloses
match-safe."
It was just as the stranger described.
The man who had paid the two dollars looked
rather crestfallen as he explained how the
stick had come into his possession.
ssWas the fellow who sold it to you tall
spare, semi-genteel chap?" asked the
stranger.
eyes," replied the man.
ssJust as thought" responded the stran-
ger. II employed that fellow as my valet
just out of charity, and this is the way he
has repaid me- I'm awfu,ly much obliged to
YOU for aiding me in recovering the cane"
and the handsome stranger bowed himself
out.
The stranger met the seedy-looking man
around the corner and they whacked up the
two dollars.
The Irish standard., 1889-03-16
What Caused the Noise.

sis that the bell Of the scissors grinder
outsider asks Broughpe. ''No, replied his
Wife. s:You hear Mamie's bangle-bracelet.
She's up stairs.''
The Irish standard., 1889-03-16

be at a certain point aDOuC SIX lilies away
at ten o'clock that night, and we were on
hand to board and capture her. There were
four men aboard, one of whom had charge
Of the correspondence. He had snug lit
tie Office fitted up, bought postage stamps
by the hundred, and had about MN a
bushel Of compromising documents
The receipts must have averaged $500 or
more per day, and among the letters
ordering the ''queer'' were eplstles from
several Captains and Major. The messen-
ger knew no one outside the boat. ROBERTS
and his wife knew only the messenger.
Man and wife got regular salary OF fifteen
dollars per week, while the messenger got
twenty collars. OF the four on the boat not
one would betray his comrades, and so we
did not get the printers and engravers at
that haul. We got about thirty thousand
dollars in counterfeit money, over one thou
sand dollars in gold and a mass of evidence
which raided the armies and put a decided
stop to the business which had so long
fourished Several officers were court
martialed and dismissed, and number OF
supposed respectable citizens along the
river found it healthy to remove to distant
points.
Two years later, when q gang OF counter
feiters in Rhode Island was broken up, and
two of the slickest captured, one Of them,
| who went by the name of friendly told
me that he printed all the money used along
the Ohio up to the date Of my raid, and that
the printing was done within square OF
police station in Louisville. He said that
the gang included at least seventy live men,
some Of whom were city or. county officials,
coal dealers, steamboat men and grocers,
and the profits Of each one amounted to af
least fifty dollars per week Out OF the
pull only two men were sent to prison, but
il ended the business ct once along The
x1yer.-N. y. ess
The Irish standard., 1889-03-16

The stranger met the seedy-looking man
around the corner and they whacked up the
two dollars.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31
FEMININE DRE SS.
"Bab" Th,nbs That Man Docs Sot Us
derstanJ ~.

derstanJ II.
How willing the general man Is 10
take all the burdens OF fcmininity on
his shoulders Mankind resumes the
responsibility OF corsets and high-heel-
cd shoes; he troubles himself about
petticoats and he thinks women ought
not TO earn their own living. AS far as
the last goes | am with him rapturOus-
ly and enthusiastically ! shake him
by the hand and ask him 20 produce
man and n brother TO earn bread and
butter and jam for every woman who
hasn't got it. From Miss Muirct down
we would all TO like sit on the tuffet
and be fed with curds and whey. There
Is no reason in the world why man
should object TO properly made high
heclod shoe II IL fits you well II
doesn't hurt your foot half as much as
, one Of those drcadfully broad so-called
common sense ones in which slender
feet waddo around and are made un-
comfortable The high heel keeps you
out OF the mud II you are n small wo-
man IL adds to your dignity and it Is
too altogether wOmanly-looking for any
thing. Whenever | see, in hotel cor
ridor pair OF mons shoes, and just
beside them. waiting TO DO brushed, "A
pair OF common-scnse. broad, low-heel-
ed denominations, / am always certain
there is woman in tho room who OBJ
jccts TO fceing the walters, who wears
loose corset, who is llat-chested and
won't let her drcss-makcr put any
cotton I'm TO make her look better, and
who thinks il is perfectly silly in John
to expect TO bo kissed at any time ex-
cept when he is going of on n long trip
or IL IL should DO discovered that he
was dying, and somehow ! have IN
idea that John himself has long ceased
TO hunger for those kisses.
Now, why should man bother about
tho health OF pcttcoats? He doesn't
have TO wear them. The Lord didn't
build him so that he was TO have them
hung around his hips, and when He
made women he did. Those marvels Of
lace and silk were thought Of and It
was known that their appearance would
be entirely spoiled II they were slung
from her shoulders by n pair of braces.
Take any wild country whore civilized
dress is unknown whore tho natural
woman is found and you will discover
that she carries her baby on her hips
md pitcher Of water on hor head, but
that she sings nothing over her shoul-
doris. | think it is only necessary for
mankind to trouble themselves about
tho way wo woar our pctticoatS when
we raise m objoc ion TO the adjustment
OF his trousers For my own part he
can wear them by string about his
neck il no wants 10, though | don't
think he would look pretty in that way,
and perhaps it would be bcttcr for him
TO stick TO his braces N. Y. Star.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31
THE LITTLE SISTER.
Young Persons Who Are - Great Trial to
Marrlhgeable Young Ladies'


Marrlngeablc Young Ladies'.
Little sisters are great trial 10 the
young lady with her first beau
They have such deadly habit Of
telling just the secrets that their big
sister wouldn't have known for the
world, and telling them at just tho
worst time they could possibly select.
And, what is more, they seem TO take
malicious pleasure in telling them.
II Mary Jane has kept her hair
rolled up for two days, TO be we'll
frizzcd when Augustus calls, her little
sister will note the proceeding, and just
as Mary Jane has assured her admir-
ing swain that her hair curls natural-
~, and that it Is almost impossible TO
make it stay anywhere, up will pop
tho small sister, ana tell the whole
story Of the curl-popcrs, and in all
probability she will add the infornla-
tion that Mary Jane puts red ink on
her checks to make her "prtty."
Little sisters are always cropping
out at the wrong time. They never
want TO go TO bed the nights when tho
big sisters boau is expected, ana no
amount Of coaxing and candy can con-
vince them that they are sleepy.
They haze eyes for every thing and
ears that would detect the slightest
whisper, and next day, at tho dinner
table the big sister will be- mortified
TO death and the whole family will DO
thrown into commissions by the piping
announcement from the small sister:
"Gus Jones bit our Mary Jane last
night, right into the mouth! | seen
himl And shc bit him back!'
Little sisters always want TO know
all the why's and the whorcforcs. Ono
of them Is likely TO climb on the knee
of an aspiring young gentleman suit
or and ask him why he doesn't have
more hairs in his mustacho; she would
like TO ask him II he doesn't feel bad
because his nose is long, and it would
delight her dcar litllo heart 90 impart
to him tho fact that Mary Brown and
Sister Jauo both said he was too long
legged for any thing but greyhound.
crcts with most delightful candor, and
whilo the young gentleman caller is
waiting for the young lady of tho
family TO give the final touches to her
toilet before coming down tho small
sister will confdcntially make him
acquainted with tho fact that papa
swcars at mamma right along" and
that "wo have old hen for dinner and
call it chicken pie" and that "Sistor
Jane wants TO get married awfully to
some rich young fool who will keep
her without work"
Little sisters will put molasscs candy
in the chair and see you sit down on
IL without word of warning; they
will wipe their bread and butter hands
on your pantaloons; they will cradle
their kittens In your siX-dollar hat;
they will pin you and your iuamorata
to the chairs; they will put burrs in
your hair; they will sift sawdust from
the cracked bodies Of thcir dolls down
the back Of your neck; and they will
make faces at you. and yell like littlo
demons II you attempt to defend your
self.
Therefore, we say TO you: If pos
siblc, avoid going courting in families
whero there are little sisters unless
you are SO deeply in love as to be per-
foctly Indifferent and reckless rs 10
consequences. N. \. Weekly
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31
ABOUT PRAIRIE-DOGS.
what "a Visitor to One OF Their "Town,
Saws of Them.

Says of Them.
The prajric-dog is no moro like a dog
than he is like an elephant Instead Of
being n carnivorous canine. with dan
ger in his eye and trcachcry in his
mind, hc is prairie marmot, a CHUBBY,
fat-paunchcd ground squirrel, with
short tail lie is the jollic,t little ro-
dent under the sun; he is as lively rs Il
cricket, IA watnhful rs weasel, and,
to all appearances, rs happy as tho day
is long
While you are still some distance
from the town YOU see the Inhabitants
running freely about, nibbling at roots
and blades of grass, and toraging at
quite n little d d.stauco from their re-
spectivo dwellings; but rs soon rs you
show yourself within n hundred yards
OF the municipal suburbs, the alarm is
quietly given and every dog scampcrs
for his burrow as fast ~ his stumpy
little legs can carry him.
On reaching his open door which is
a six inch hole running down through
the center OF little mound like Il
miniature volcano with "a bottomloss pit
for crater, he poisos himself on the
rim, stands up on his hind-fcct so high
and SO straight that hc looks uncom-
monty like tent peg, and views the
landscape DER
When you get fairly into tho town the
holes are found TO be rs thick as apple
trees in an orchard, and on each of the
mounds, excepting tho very nearest
there will be prairie-dog. yapping
away at you rs ifhis whole life depend
ed upon his bringing out hundred and
twenty yaps to the minute. Perhaps
twenty dogs will be barking indus
'riously at you in concert with twenty
tails jerking spasmodically in unison
and twenty pairs OF eyes watching you
with keen interest
AS you slowly walk forward and cross
the imaginary dead line that the noar-
est dog hcs drawn around himself, he
dives head foremost into the bowels of
tho earth, and his tail wrinkles merri-
ly from side to side as his hind feet
disappear
When you run forward and apply
your car TO the hoe your hc,h' an iudis-
t.nct, shulling sound, which grows
fainter and fainter. until IL finally
ceases, and then you hear his jolly lit
tie bark. "Chit.tit-tit-tit!' come like
a smothered laugh from the regions be-
low. Youths Companion.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31
MUCH LABOR LOST.
Tho Kind of Cats Tails an old Farmer
brought 10 Market.

Tho Kind of Cats Tails an old Farmer
brought 10 Market.
Old Farmer (sauntcring into n largo
dry-goods store bearing wcll-dllcd
two-bushel bag on his shouldcr)-
Say, young fcller, is this whar they
buy cats tails?
Clerk-Cats tails?
"l cs, cats tails
Great Scott, man, what do YOU
mcan?'
"Meau? Why, | mean jest whut [
say. DO yer buy emp
Certainly not mover heard Of
any body buying such things"
"Nover. ChP'
"Of course not"
"Wal, thar's somcthin' quarc crbout
il then. Why, CT lcctlc while back
thcr clo oman read in or paper whar
IL wuz writ down thct cat tails wu2 in
big dcman' an that city folks paid
fer 'cm fer ornamcntin' popposes.
Then fell ter thinkin' on it, an it
como ter me thot os ther yus or power
q cats erround, | could Jest os easy
turn or few honest dimes es not, an
crcordin' went ter work an gethored
up that air bag full ov 'om, an
they're monstrous fine 'uns. too Yer
shore they don't buy 'em, air yer?'
"Yes. But / think | understand
where you missed IL. The cat tails
referred to by the paper are species
OF slough grass"
"lleyP An IL didn't mean rale
shore nun cat tails or tall?'
"No."
"Wal, of that don't jest nashuly
stump my tators. Why, say. I've put
In er whole month gittin' them air.
au' I've cut ther tail often every cal
fer ten mile erround. Say, | bet yer
never seed sich en- lot o. bobtail cats
sence you war born es thar is up whar
I uve."-Detroit Free Press.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31
"Old Hickory" Was Tough.

Traveller in sparsely settled region
in Tennessee Coming down with red
eyes to breakfasD--You say, madam,
General jackson once slept in the bed
| occupied last nightP
Aged landlady of country tavern
He did, fer n fack.
Travcler-Was it-er-the same bed
in all respects il is nowP
Aged landlady-Jes' the same.
Traveler-And he actually slept in
itp Sure he sleptP
Aged landlady - Sartin'. That :
what | wuz sayin'. He slep' in it.
Traveller (wonderingly)-What a
hide he must have had!-Chicago
Tribune.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31

"A Jersey City postman recently
sasg piece Of paper sticking out Of a
crack in the fire alarm box. Being a
man Of experience. he investigated
and pulled out "a letter. lie mailed
the letter and then followed it TO its
address, which was in the city. There
he learned that if was dated seven
months before.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31
Consumption surely cured

10 rHE EiITOE- Please iuf0-5a Your reaG ~
that ] have a positive remedy " the above
named disease. By its tizcly use thousands Of
h0if lcss casts have lccu permanently cure. I
sha bcgiad 10 send two bottles II my rem edy
TREE e. any Of your readers who have consup D.
ION II they viii send ne their express and | d.
Oiiirc address RcsDcctfilly
T. 4. FLOCUN. V. g.. Isl Pear ST.. New York.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31
HE WAS NEAR TIE BRINK.
derful Occurrence whith Took Place
Ara Kingston, ~. !.

IFpFTIH f7rrffp'H HIfHcs E0fOn FHp'rD
An event has taken place in tins city 50 re-
markahc Ia It's nature, that | venture 10 dcs-
cribe 1t IN fun. Tho principal Ia the affair I,
Mr. Jcre Smith, son Of Cornelius u. Smith, ot
the State Insurance Department at Albany.
who Is well known, stands very high, and is in
every way reliable. have had IA long aud most
interesting interview with him, which ! trans
cribc and send you in his own words, trusting
1t may prove valuable 10 your readers:
During last year" he said, ~ could not
understand what was the trouble with me. I
] had always felt strong and hei rty, but grR-
duully became aware that something was un-
lgI mining IN | first heVuu IN fg.I Ir.Uay
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31

-Sices Of salt pork. freshened ana
loI -ed as usual. and baked IN spiders
In hot oven win De nicely brorucd
ana Grip with yey Iitt.o 'at left in it,
and the hou5" Hi.. Mt be f''cd with
sm. l:c - I'D ry n-.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31

SIS worth of Goods, 3 down
and s3 90 per month
40 worth of Goods, 4 down
and $4OOpe month
so worth of Goods, s down
and s5 90 per month
90 worth of Goods, 6 down
and So 90 per month
70 worth OF Goods, 7 down
and 81 90 per month
SO worth of Goods, 8 down
and IS 90 per month
90 worth of Goods, 9 down
and 50 90 per month
700 worth of Goods, 10 down
and $1,000 por month
These terms, together with
our Guarantee OF Good and
Fair Treatment in case of
sickness or trouble, have won
for our store the reputation as
being the place of all others TO
buy House Furnishing Goods.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31

Such Is the account Of probably rs narrow an
escape from death rs was over known. lho
first symptoms which Mr. Smith felt were such
as many others feel but do not consider worth
noticing. IL is plain, however, tnat the early
indications of a dangerous GiscHae cannot be
triilCd with, hut must bc met promptly, ana by
such II remedy us hta lC.u proven 10 be indeed
. friend in tmc OF need.
WINTHROP.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31
Something TO Think OF

She looked sharply ut the steak as the
butcher placed 1t on the scales, aud as
he was wrapping It up she observed;
"You don't dehoru your cattle.
see"
"No. ma am"
"What do you think OF tho idca'"
"Nevor gave It any thought ma amt"
81 wish you would. so that the next
time come in you can tell me why
they should saw or and throw away
two or three pound. Of horn instead OF
finding way TO sell them with the
stake AT sixtccn coats per poundl' -
Detroit Free Press.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31

One OF the most remarkable fcats
in modern journalism was once
achieved 10y Mrs. Isabelle II. Barrows.
OF Boston. She wrote n verbatim re-
port Of a speech made in German by
Carl Schurz. which she turned into
English while her pen was flying
across her paper in stonographic char
ncters. To write stcnographically and
translate from German to English
simultaneously was n remarkable piece
Of shorthand reporting.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31
Happy by Comparison.

Hello McGinnis, you look blue.
What is the matterp"
Matter enough. Boil on tho back
OF my neck
by George, old fellow, l sympa-
thizo with you!'
"But you are not looking rcmarka-
bly, cheerful yourself, Whackster
Any thing wrong with youP'
"My wife is cleaning house"
(FervcntlyD Thank Heaven for
my boil. Chicago Tribune.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31

In New York City the Catholics
have obtained $4,000 900 OF public
Epuey in the past fifteen years Tor
school purposes.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31

7I UTNWTI u TIFT TITIWNNs
and then In n day or two 7
would be uunntura!,y wi o
"A W n X q. ~trHnU" puiua
would come i'm different
pnrt- Ot my body. Ny
head d!d not ache much
but IL usually felt heavy.
| was sometimes hungry
and sometimes | hated
food, while my sleep was
very irregular. / could
not understand what it
but thought 1t
might pass away nftcr u
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31

CcptlNe, the most nor
rible malady the world
has ever known. IL has
no settled symptoms, but
assumes every imaginable
form. | had no idea that
II was Bright's disease that
was undermining me until
l began 10 bloat, and
now that | am well aud
enjoying life, | feel like
telling everybody about
my miraculous escape.
Is IL any wonder this
tow is arOu sed
over my rcsurrec-
A.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1889-05-31

time: but ~ did not. | don't sec how j could
have been so blind, but | suppose I was liko
most people who are troubled i'm the same wuy,
and Thought IL nothing dangerous. After
awhile ] noticed peculiar color and odor
about the fluids was passing: that they wcto
dark AZ times AMI very light Ht others. Finally
j began 20 gain flesh, but I knew Tint IL WINS
unnatural ana that WIS blOating. This fright
encd me and consulted phySCItns. who were
very kind I'm their attentions, but did not help
me in the least. My father then went with me
o. New York, and we consulted the eminent DIR.
keycs, who treated me for several weeks. At
that time my condition was horrible. | was
bloated from head To foot, IL was almost impos-
sibe to breathe, and | could not sleep. In
several places On my body the skin burst open,
SO great WIS the pressure from within. The
agony ] endured was indcscrlHhe. Then tho
doctor told me my case was hopeless, that | had
Bright's disease in It's worst form, and that had
only IA few days To live"
me and would not see me die without n struggle.
He did not urge, he insisted on my making one
more effort, and did So. noticed nm improve
mcnt at once; In four days the swelling greatly
decreased and the pain wholly ceased. | con-
tinued 10 improve and am n well man to-day,
and owe my life 10 the marvellous effects Of
that wonderful preparation Hunts Remedy.
i believe this ~ tine greatest medicine that
was ever discovered 10y man, and only wish
the whole world might know what it has done
for me"
"I know there arc thousands GsofpcoplctroublCd of
rs was and I'm Just ms great danger, hut they y
not realize IL. Brght's disease H. the most de-