The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1889-02-20
MORGAN'S FEEBLE MULES.
CONVINCE AN OBSERVER THAT ALL
THE STORIES ARE TRUE.

They Came Up tho Hin with mo Moro
Life Than Pair of Old Rubber Boots"
Trip Down tho other Side Like
Streak Of Lightning.
Near the backwoods village Of Tanners
vile there Is a long and very steep hill in the
road. 1t has: "a sharp bend in it about half
way down. On the outer curve the bank is
quite high. At the foot of that bank field
stretches away in a gradual slope for prob
ably 100 yards, when it drops suddenly to an
incline of As degrees. That sharp incline is
800 yards from top to bottom, and the bot
tom is simply the top of ledge that has a
sheer fall of 20 feet From the bottom
of that ledge there Is another sloping piece
of ground 200 feet or so wide, and at tho
lower edge of that slope another ledge drops
perpendicularly Is feet, the west branch Of
Bear Run flowing at its base. II l have
made the topography of that section of
rather rolling country tolerably plain it
will BIO noticed that man in toboggan,
taking the course have marked out,
would get enough sport out Of one ride to
last him until the opening of the next season.
''6oNE FOR sARTINgn
was standing in the road on the long and
crooked hill listening to Uncle Job Snyder,
the great hunter, bemoaning the decadence
Of game, when Bill Morgan, teamster from
the Sheasley mills, appeared He had la pair
Of hobs with a good load OF logs aboard, and
the load was drawnb by d couple of small, de-
spondent looking mules. Bill stopped when
he came to the hill to adjust his brake chain,
for when a team comes down that hilllwith
a load the wagon or sled has got to have all
the brake on it that heavy chains can give
As Bill Morgan was adjusting his chaims
Uncle Job Snyder said to me-. +,
Them mules hain't got no moro life in 'em
than pair o. old rubber boots I'm alluz
glad when SEQ ern raise this hill agoin' home,
fer don't want 'em TO drop dead round
heren
Bill Morgan set his brake chains and came
on down the hill. As tho mules passed us l
noticed That they certainly did look asif q
sudden jar would startle life away from
them. They went as in hopeless sort Of
way, and had reached the very steepest part
of the hill when the brake chain separated
and the hobs and logs began pushing rather
savagely against the heels of those little
mules. Ek F :.
Now they'na gone, sartinr exclaimed
Uncle Job Snyder.
pers, under these circumstances, would have
Kicked logs and hobs into slivers. Did these
real American mules-supposed to be on the
verge of dissolution at that--io anything Of
that kinda No. They let those logs and
hobs prod them in the heels two or three
times, and then, as IL tho thing had all
been planned beforehand, away they went
down that hill They wentso fast that their
legs looked like spokes in trotting sulky be-
hind. horse going a mile in 2l4.
sHrhey hain't got time to die nowpi ex-
claimed Uncle Job Snyder 'sButi they1lbe
goncrs when they git to the bottom o the
hill.n
ONLY LITTLE MINDED.
But they didn't get to the bottom of the
hill. When they reached the bend in the
road they didn't bend with it, but kept
straight on. Down tho bank they went,
down the sloping field, with tho hobs and
the logs doing their very best to keep up.
When the mules struck the top Of the As degs.
incline and went on town it they we're going
80 fast that il there hadn't been snow on the
ground to throw them out in relief we could
scarcely have seen Them Then tho top OF
tho first ledge was reached, and mules, hobs,
and logs disappeared Uncle job Synder
was about to open his mouth and say, HThat
settles itin when the logs came In sight, going
like streaks OF lightning down the second
slope toward the ledge along the creek. They
had broken their fastenings and shot over the
mules, but the mules followed right on In
their wake, holding the hobs behind them. II
was like q shadow passing over field to see
those logs, mules and hobs fitting down that
slope. The top OF tho second ledge was
reached, and the whole cavalcade disappeared
again. Nothing came In sight any more
Thar I" exclaimed Uncle Job, with sigh
bfrehef, fNothin' kin ever mako mo b'lievc
that them mules didn't die fore they got 10
the bend in this hill, but they war pushed 50
hard they couldn't drop. What'll ye take for
their shoes, Billf'
Bill didn't say and just for curiosity Invent
down with him. and Uncle job to sec how
badly the mules were wrecked. II was some
thing Of job oget there, but wo managed
It. There wasn't much left OF the hobs, and
the logs were lying about promiscuously, a
good deal splintered and jemmed. But there
Ia the midst OF the wreck and up TO their
knees in water stood these two mules, looking
just as respondent as ever and painting lit
tie, but as much alive as any mules that ever
hee-hawed and without scratch on 'eml
Uncle Job stood simply aghast. He could
scarcely believe his eyes, even after Bill had
led the mules out of the creek on the other
side and started TO lead them across lots to the
hill, the bottom of which they hadn'treached.
Then Uncle dob shouted:
tsBini III give ye $500 fer them myles!n
j came away soon afterward and don't
know whether the mules changed hands or
not, but do know that never again can any