The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-11-03
BRIGHT BITS.

BISKs-Barlow says betting is not against his
Winks-of course not; be hasn't any.-New
York sun.
SMERAL-Are Jones and Briggs friendsf
Grimsby -Friendsl No, indeed They couldn't
hate each other more IL they sang in the same
church chOir.-TfBe.
sHE lat the piano,-Listen! How do you en-
He-Very much. The more you refrain the
better like it.-AIsicdl Courier.
He OUGHT TO BE AsHAxED.-Keely Motor
Stockholders Ito Mr. K. sternly)-Are you
aware, sir, that they've got even that Cronin
jury finished ahead OF you,-Chfcd9o Tribune
PATIENCE on a monument. smiling at grief, -
is wholesome enough; but Patience would never
have had monument if she had waited for
New York to build it.-Neto Orleans P.cdy1lne.
MRS. GAzzAM-James, believe you were at
that prize hght last night that the papers are
full Of this morning.
Gazzam-I was at q pound social, love-
Time.
DID you hear Of the snake up at the museum
that was trying to get inside of itself?'
Yes. They call him the dude anaconda
because he's such a swalow-tal. "-HdTper's
Bdzdr.
"WHAT? Is the Widow Brown going to be led
to the altar for the third time?
mo, guess not. She ought to be able to find
her way there herself by this me."-Fltegende
Bldetter.
BANKs-Say, why do you call q political
speech-making tour stamping the state;'
Politician-Because that is the way they get
the dead wood" on their opponents.
Enterprise.
acknowledgement means without a
name; write a sentence showing you understand
how to use the word.
Small Girl (writes(-Our new baby is anony-
mous.-Lfe.
REGISTRAR OF vorERs-How old are you,
madam?
Ancient Female have seen 10 summers, sir
Registrar-Er, uni How long have you been
blind?-NeIo York Sun.
II DON'T SEE how man can bring himself to
open pawn Office" said Gibson.
Why not?" asked Bison.
Because it's such loansome business ~
Commercial advertiser.
REGINALD DUDEKIS-Ah, I say. old man,
what's all this talk about 400th snniversarys
Petit de Peyster-Weally, now, don't just
know, you know. Fancy it's something Meal
lister is getting up.-Ltfe.
"How shall we move the massess' asked the
temperance orator. Just then some one in the
outskirts of the crowd remarked: "Come up
and take a drink fellows" and the masses
moved-Munsey's Weekly.
JUDGE-witness, you are 40 years of ageg
Female Witness->Yes, alasl One gets older
every day. And yet was young once (heaving
a sigh. All, your worship would hardly be
hCNO hOM young WdSI-p tSyeHue 0GQCCef hQt-
ender, 1890.
A SAFE AFFIRMATIoN.-The clock struck IL.
Darling, will you love me when I'm gomez
II can safely say yes, Mr.. Smithers, because
it doesn't look now as if you would ever CO.
replied the young lady. And then Smithers
knew his case was hopeless.-Hdrper's Bdzdr.
GREEDY WRONG AGAIN.-Little Dot-Mamma,
didn't papa say Gen. Greedy predicted high
winds for to-day?
Mamma-Yes, my dear; he read ir in the
paper
Little Dot-Well, they isn't high at all. They
is so low down they most blowed me over
NeU York Weekly
"DoCTAH told me that must not walk W ap-
idly or dwink ice watah, " said Gus De Joy, con-
fidingly. to Miss Belle Pepperton.
"Did he?''
"Ya-as; he said might get congestion of the
bwain, you know"
Dear me; how little these doctors seem to
w."-MerchGnt TrGUeter
WELL, DENNIS" said gentleman to his
gardener, I'm told you have fallen into bad
habits"
''How is that. sorg"
81 hear that you have gotten to be hard
drinker"
"Harrud dhrinker. is it?''
Yes"
'Begorra, its few people as drinks aisier
than meself. " Merchant Traveller.