The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-01-31
WHY THEY DIE YOUNG.
Tribulations, Distractions and Per
plexities of the Ticket-Seller.

From the NeW York World.
The lot of a ticket-seller in the box Office
of a theater is not happy one. He may
have the patience of Job when he starts in
at the beginning of the season, but before it
is half through his mother wouldn't recog-
nize / i'm if she had to take his measure by
the amiability of his temper. Any young
man who sticks to the business long enoug
dies Young. That is the reason there are no
elderly men treasurers in New York the
alter. Fancy what ey have to go through.
Two ladies make their appearance in front
of a ticket office. They are not all smiles,
because they are on business bent, and wa t
to purchase two tickets. Up goes the box
ofics window, and the ladies, addressing the
man on the inside, begun:
1.-TWO seats, fleasew
"For to-nightW
"Why, yes, OF course-to-nlgnt!"
"What price seats9"
dollar and half seats"
The ticket seller looks over his ticket
rack. selects two tickets and lays them be-
fore the ladies.
Are these good seats, nowW
Every good, indeed; 3 and T."
"Are you sureF
Quite sure, adam"
"Where are they"
Near the center Of the orchestram
Chow far is that from the stage~
Mine rowsW
"Nine rows! oh, that is too far back"
"They are excellent seats l can assure
you"
Can you hear well therep
"Splendidly."
And see well?"
"Ce tainlg."
But don't you think nearer the stage
would e betterW
mo: don't think So"
81 don't think I'd like these"
"Well, can give you two in B."
"In BIZ
"Y eS"
"Where's By
Second row from the orchestra rail"
"lsn't that too rear the musicp
"Well, it IS rather close"
81 don't like to be near the orchestra
The tickets fist offered you are more
de irable."
but don't like them"
Where would you like to have your seats,
then"
"Where would you suggestp
''I'd take them further back"
Il don't like back seats, at all! Have you
any in HH'
Eyes, madam"
"Then let me see them"
The ticket man picks out two seats, 9 and
II H.
Are these aisle seats"
mo, they are near the side"
Can you see thsreP
"Yesn
Haven't you got any aisle seatsF'
"No.n
That's too bad like aisle seats, or ct
least my husband likes tnem. Hs is very
nervous, you know, and he always goes out
when he curtain is down.
YES, madam; there are a great many
nervous gentlemen IN New York"
do YOU think soi'
"Yes, madam; know So"
Dear me. how strange"
"Very."
care YOU nervous7"
No, but am getting that way"
"Oh! so sorry.n
"Snall you take these tickets"
"YOu say you haven't any aisle seatsf'
mot one left In the house"
LET me see a diagramp
There is one before you, madam"
ooh, yes. So it is"
The lady and companion study the dia-
gram, and have a dialogue about he SEATS
location, and advantage and disad vantage
of sitting in particular seats, totally OBJ
livious Of the fact that there are dozen
other people standing in long row in the
cold 10 get at the window.
"What part of the house is this"
THAT'S the stage
1.-THE stage, dear me--does 1t look like
THAR
II suppose So"
"SuppOse--don't you known
"Non
"Why don't you known
Excuse me, madam; but will you kindly
make your selection of tickets, as there are
number OF other ladies and gentlemen
waiting to purchase
II think you are very rudep
Pardon me, madam, but
"No explanation necessary"