davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
CHUNKS OF HUMOR.

WHY should the spirit Of mortal Be
proud! No reason we can see, unless he owns an
ice pond.-PWok.
It Is said that every man has his double:
1t generally occurs in youth, during the green
apple season. .-Prouide1ce Journal.
The mean Is not the extreme, but If there
is anything msaner than hornets extreme Il hsa
not come this way.-Bfnghdm Republican.
Defnitive. Justice-Wh the charge 2
Complainant-I amt dead sure; but from tn
feelin' Ireckon he must r used buck shot, y'F
honor.-Puck.
Justly Incensed. sir. we
cannot admit you; we take only single gentle-
men.
Married Appiicant-well ain'tI = single gen.
tlemany What d. ye take me for-a pair OF
Eiamese twins l--PWck.
Didn't Charge Anything.-'Ts this bst-
terry charged % asked young man, touching sn
electrical apparatus in one Of the downtown
stores.
''No, sir; we do strictly cash business here ~
Judge.
How It Happened-very tall toVery bowt
legged man--Great Scott Did you learn to walk
too young, or whatp
Bow-legged man-Stranger, warped my legs
STOPPING down to avoid long-legsed bores VINO
ask questions. Judge.
Didn't Care TO See It.-Artist-Now, you
must not 20 until you have see n my best work.
wish to show you picture that was exnioatea u
the last Paris salon.
Miss Porcine tof chicago)-Excuse me Nh.
Atelier, but don't care to examine any Ialoon
pictures to-day.-JHdgs.
Why He Lingered.-Tom Ginn-Ism
sorry, Mr.. Martel, but can't sell yon another
drink. IT'S after o'cIoek-time to close up and
90 homs. / guess your wife viii be expecting
you.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
PENNSYLVANIA PRODUCTS.

THE new town Of Jeanette has '.hustling
undertaken who is also life insurance agent.
A. W. McCLosKEx. Of Venango borough,
has painted the top and bottom Of his fence
black, in memory, as be says, Of prohibition.
A BUTLER man was arrested one day last
week simply for trying to lay by something for
. rainy day. He had stolen seven umbrellas.
OF loo tomato plants set out by Anthony
Bullock, Of Upper Providence. Delaware coun-
ty, fully 200 were eaten by potato bugs within
48 hours.
An Armstrong county man has been sent to
fail for 10 days for singing. His musical per-
formance took place on araflroad train, and he
wouldn't stop when requested By pass sngers.
ALANcAsTER paper says that pugilist Of
that city, returning to his home by night from
his usual haunts, was attacked BY large goat
owned by Adam Dsnnis, the negro minstrel,
knocked down and 50 used up that he had to
cry for help. His body Is badly mutilated.
ONE Of Frankiin's most able ministers, In the
course Of . sermon recently, referred, Is an IL
iustratfon, 20 soldier who had lost both arms
In the war The old soldier returned home and,
the minister went on TO say, awent up 70 =
friend and plhced his hand on the friends
shoulder The minister Il still trying 70 dis
cover what caused the audience TO smile as
that particular place in bis DISCOURSE
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
ALL IN COSTUME.
A Very Pretty Amateur Theatrical and
Musical Performance.

A Very Pretty Amateur Theatrical and
Musical Performance.
The large hall Of the Pittsburg Female Col
lege presented pretty appearance last even
ing. The occasion was the presentation Of
'sThe German Peasant Concert" and after
this, Pandora"
The large hall was not as well filed as it
should have been, probably owing to the ex-
tremely warm weather, but the visitors present
enjoyed the affair most thoroughly. and the
pretty singing and clever acting of the young
amateurs show very plainly that the Eastern
college craze Of amateur theatr1cals has
reached here with q vengeance, and found
some very bright amateurs, too.
The German concert was rendered by some
eight lovely young misses dressed in the pretty
peasant costumes of that country, somewhat
overdrawn, perhaps, as to color and arrange
ment, but very pleasing nevertheless. The
singers were Misses Mae Zeth, Catherine
Collins, Lulu Orcutt, Mary Robinson, Margie
Wilson and Emma Walter.
The Greek play, pandora" (" was also pleas
ing affair. and In this Miss Hattie Cook, as
EpfmethetLs, showed herself to be an actress
and elocutionist of rare promise, and it is said
by her many friends the young lady is studying
for the stage. The other charming participants
were Misses Emma Spandau, Mary Reed, Ola
Lockwood, Nan Snodgrass Kittie Lyons and
Mr.. Frank NorcrosA
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
A PHILADELPHIA GOLD MINE.
Bradford's GuIch, Regular Mining Camp,
in the Quaker City.

PHILADELPHIA, May 17.-For some time q
regular mining camp has been in existence in
q back yard In this city. Its owner is Hezekiah
Bradford, man Of 80, living on North Twenty.
second street. Big boxes containing precious
ore are brought from Mr.. Bradford's Colorado
mines.
The roomy back yard is Uttered with all the
appurtenances OF camp life. Two big mining
sieves stand in the center, and steady stream
of water courses through them. In the sum-
mer big tent Is stretched over the yard. Two
or three times week the big boxes from his
Colorado mines are brought to the house by
express wagons and then all Is hustle and in
dustry at the camp. Two stalwart workmen
man the crusher, big grinding machine OF
the old miners invention. The contents OF the
boxes are poured into the hopper, and rocks
and earth are ground to fine proportions.
Then Miner Bradford and his workmen put
the crushed ore, rock and dirt through the
sieves, rocking them TO and fro while stream
of water plays on the precious mud. The gold
or silver bearing rock 10 thus separated In
measure from the worthless dirt, and next the
assaying apparatus in the house Is brought into
play. With that Mr.. Bradford tests the result
Of his washing and determines whether the
new diggings at his distant mines keeps up the
average of pure metal found in former ship
ments. After saving sample, which he care
fully dates and numbers and places with his
collection, the remainder of the precious metal
is taken to the Mint and sold. The principal
product Of his mines, however, Is disposed Of In
ho Waaf
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18

As the heated season advances with rapid
strides, the fact that the drug stores are not
permitted either to sell even soda water or
mineral drinks on Sunday, lends force to
the suggestion that someone feelingly pro-
vides drinking fountains, where plenty Of
cool water can be procured by the crowds
who march the streets on Sunday afternoons
"a better and healthier resort than hot
courts and back alleys.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18

The doctor at Clifton Springs, New York,
who accidentally hanged himself in testing
the new suspensOry apparatus for the cure
of curvature of the spine, reversed the usual
medical ruleof fiat erperinaentuul IN cOrpore
Vtli. The doctor who hangs himself first,
in order to find ont whether his patients
can stand the process, certainly exercises.
perhaps an excessive, but still commend
able degree of caution.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
currrNe rHErR own rHRoArs.

The natural result of the agitation which
has been most successful in the cattle raising
States, against dressed beef, is apparent in
the fact that English journals are pointing
to it as an argument for excluding Ameri-
can beef from their country. OF course the
English interest that will use this argu-
ment most freely, win be financially bene-
ftsd By the exclusion but when they can
point TO the example Of cattle raising States
as refusing to permit the sale Of dressed
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18

IT Is noticeable that the Philadelphia
License Court took the same view of the
license law, with regard to wholesale license,
that our own court did. 1t rejected 225 ap-
plieations for wholesale licenses. The case
win be carried to the Supreme Court from
Philadelphia, and there the question will
be decided whether the same discretion is
given for granting of Wholesale licenses as
has already been supported with regard to
the retail licenses.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
TB AULDEN TYNE CONCERT
of the Central Reformed Presbyterian
Choral Society a Success.

OF the Central Reformed PFesDyteflan'
Choral Society Success.
The members Of the Central Reformed Pres
byterian Choral Society gave their last concert
of the term last night at Masonic Hail. Allie
pheny, Mr.. w. g. Weeden, the President,
acting as director Of the evenings perform
ances.
It was "Ye Aulden Tyne Concert in all the
details Of its arrangements. The lady members
of the society were all arTayed in the fashions
of the past from the ultra-grotesque, puffed-up
kind of costume of the times of Queens Ammo
and Elizabeth, to the more picturesque Of the
ACE of Marie Antoinette. Among the gentle
men some very elegant suits were noticed, and
altogether the stage presenteda a very attractive
appearance.
The programme was composed Of q numbers
of choruses, quartets and solos OF the best
known composers Of the day.
Messrs. ID. E. Nuttall, W. r. Haines, W. 8.
Weeden, ]. A. Strouss, the members of the
Alpine Quartet, with MI Sam NJ. Brown as &C
companist, rendered very efficient assistance in
making the concert the success it turned out
To be.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
MARRIED. In THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD.
A Young Couple Who Were Bound to Wed
and Succeeded.

NEW haven, May H.-A young couple were
married in the road in Harwinton, Litchfield
county. on Monday, under circumstances which
show the genius Of people on marriage bent.
Fred Chamberlain, the groom, is a hand
some Yankee farmer, & years Of age He
arranged to marry Miss Nellie Hungerford, q
neighbor. The HarWintonites 60 TO church in
Terryville, where the Rev. W.F.Arms breaches.
Chamberlain got his marriage license III Har.
winton and went to the minister with his ar
fianced when he was informed that the license
was good for Harvinton. but not for Terry
Vile
The unhappy couple were in quandary at
this, but they finally adopted the suggestion Of
the clergyman that he get into the hack with
them and drive into Harwiuton and there tie
the knot The driver, John Abbott out of sym.
pathy for the coupleS whipped up his horses
the middle Of the sandy road. with uncovered
heads, the marriage ceremony was quickly
uerformed.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18

COLONEL W. 8. CODY is not very well
satisfied with the reception of his Wild
West show in Paris. The experience to
which he objects most strenuously is that
the authorities of Paris insisted upon vac
cinating his entire show, Indians and all.
Colonel Buffalo Bill's stage experience
doubtless qualities him to exclaim, "This is
the most unkindest cut of ALL"
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18

THAT new English engine on the Penn
sylvania Railroad does not seem TO be able
to keep up with the rapid pace Of this
country. The Pennsylvania Railroad should
donate it to the anglomaniacs of New York.
1t may be popular with them because it is
English, even though it is not fast enough
for their balls.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18

AS the poet TennysOn is suffering more
and more under the infrmities of age, the
number of candidates for his position Of
Poet Laureate increases. As the effect of the
Office has heretofore been to deteriorate the
quality of the poetry, it is to be hoped, in
the interest Of English literature, that all
the candidates may be disappointed by the
abolition of the place.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
DEATHS OF A DAY.


sAco, NE, May E.-Joshua Clark, aged 81, an
eccentric character who has lived a. hermit in .
miserable hutin the township Of Rayton for IS
years, was found dead Wednesday in his shanty,
which he occupied in common with q hock Of
sheep. me body Of . dead lamb served as pillow
two sheep. Upon 6 dish was some raw salt pork,
which is supposed 70 have contributed ~ lest
educated man and was formerly school teacher. .
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
Only Four in One Day.

Special Telegram to The Dispatch.
WASHINGTON. May 1.-Two hundred and
three new postmasters were appointed by Mr..
Clarkson to-day, only four Of which were in
Pennsylvania, while West Virginia doomed up
mans: John Donahue, Belden; ]. Q. Boyer.
Stone Church; c. A. Daniel. Successful; E. II.
Painter, Turbotsville.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
Warning ON Locust.' wings.

From the Russellville (Ky.) Herald.1
Mr.. George R. Beall brought to our office
17.year locust, and called our attention to the
marks on its wings. He said II years ago the
locusts had on each wing the letter 'tP"-mean-
ing peace and plenty" and this year on each
wing viii be found @W''-meaning want and
war;" Thirty-fouf years ago. 50 we understand,
the locusts had the same letters Nv W." and
during that II years our Civil War occurred.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18

THE remarks upon Mr.. Kyrle Bellows
recent expose point to the conclusion that
if Mrs. Potter accepts his further assistance
in "elevating the stage" they will both to-
gether succeed in knocking thestsge higher
than kite.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18

The editorial fraternity in the Republican
party may not be saying much about the
fact that two frst-class missions-the Ger
man and Russian-are vacant; but that is no
reason why they should not keep on saving
wood, lust the same
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
A 4oa-Pouna Bear rrnppsa.

HoNEsDALE, May ia large bear has been
committing depredations on the farm Of Stan
ley Keesler, in Damascus township, until Tues
day night, when it was captured in trap set
for 1t, inst previous to Its being caught it
killed a 2year-old heifer. After the animal
had been caught in the trap 1t broke the trap
loose from its fastenings and climbed tree,
dragging the chain and trap with il It
Wairhei 400 nouudA
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
Ex-ooNvIOTs SENT FROM ENGLAND.
A Class Of Immigration That Collector
Erhardf Has N Handle.

Erhardt Has 10 Handle.
NEW YORK, May 17.-Ten contract laborers
who arrived here from Rotterdam last night,
on the steamer Obdam, were detained at Castle
Garden to-day, until Collector Erhardt in
quires into their cases. The immigrants said
that they came here at the fnstigation of the
Prisoners Aid Society Of London, with the
understanding that they were to place their
services at the disposal of Samuel Nella. So
called emigrant agent at Sequine, Tex.
The Castle Garden authorities say that they
have evidence to prove that the Prisoners Aid
Society Of London has been shipping English
convicts to Nella, in Texas, at the rate or one
or two week for many months past.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18

The arrangements for the May Festival
at the Exposition give great promise
of striking and appropriate Inauguration
of Pittsburg's new attraction. The Music
Festival will be great musical event, and
q greater social one.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18

APRoPos of Mr.. W. ID. HowellsA light
opinion of Sir Walter Scott, even the most
ardent admirers of the Wizard of the North
will have to acknowledge that Sir Walter
Scott never could have written Mr.. Howells'
novels. A hundred-pound Krupp gun never
could be Of the slightest use in shooting
eni11ae
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
Mnkiur For br niaehinerz.

From the 81. Louis OI0be-DemOcratI
After series Of experiments extending over
number Of years. q machine for the produc-
ton Of artificial fogs has been perfected. The
object is to produce sufficient humidity in the
air to render cotton spinning possible in the sui
try ycotton-groving regions Of the South. II the
fog machine effects this it will rival the cotton
gin In value and importance.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
me Yerstnble. Awnr Ahsad.

From the Punxsntawney Spirit.l
1t is now maintained by some scientists that
certain plants actually possess degree of in
telligence. That Is where they have the bulge
on certain people we know OF
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
AJudee,s Rashn.ss.

FROM the Chicago Ifmes.I
Judge Cooley is about to do perilous thing.
He is going to make an inquiry into the work
ings Of the Standard Oil Company. A man
who will do that would have his hair cut By .
circular saw
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
Too nfnch nIothsr.in.Lan.

From the Chicago Herald.1
The House of Lords at London has again
voted against the deceased wife's sister. Prob
ably the wife's folks have made lots Of trouble
for the Dukes and Earls.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18

Now that the danger is past. il is rumored
that Boulanger will go back to Paris and
resume his profession of overthrowing the
Government, in his imagination.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
May bs an Exlended strIks.

More than LOCO storemen, usually employed
in warehouses along the Brooklyn water front,
are out on strike because the warehousemen
refused to raise their wages from 20 cents to %
cents per hour. Groups Of the strikers picket
the approaches to the stores. A number OF
men who crossed the river from this city, Ho-
boken and Jersey Ciry looking for employment
at the stores returned on being told that
strike was on hand. A little over II months
ago e. b. Bartlett organized all the warehouse
men from the Empire stores to the Erie basin
into a vast corporation, which raised the rates
for wharfage and tonnage and reduced the
wages of the storemen from 25 to 20 cents an
hour. The strike viii probably extend along
the whole river 'front.'
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18

PROCTOR KNOTT, the race horse, was
beaten twice this week. This gives Gov
ernor Proctor Knott, Of Kentucky, some
chance for fame in connection with that
name
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
A Numerous Class.

From the Baltimore American.l
Many men pursue an upright course Of lie
and never oVertake it.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
anrrotsd n lhe New Borer,.

A pair Of muscular fingers were placed on
the windpipe Of Hiram W. Culver, lawyer, as
he was passing dark alley in the new Bowery,
at 10 o'clock last night. Two men took his
watch and purse and then knocked him down.
The minute the fingers loosened their grip on
Mr.. Culver's throat he yelled for help A
policeman who heard him followed the garro-
rers, and after sharp tussle arrested them.
They are now in the Tombs.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
james Gordon Bennett in Egypt.

A great many persons have been trying vainly
for several days to learn just where James Cor
don Bennett is. All sorts of wild reports as to
his present whereabouts are current. All that
is known of him at the Herald Office is that he
is now in Egypt. and that he is going further
inland. The last cablegram received from him
was dated Alexandra. One rumor is that the
cause Of Mr.. Benefits departure to Egypt is
bet he made In one of the clubs Of Paris thathe
could visit Kharroum and return unscathed.
Another report is that he received intelligence
that General Gordon was still alive and pris-
oner in the hands of the Mahdi. who would re-
lease the General in consideration Of 1,00o,0 900
francs.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18

blue blood If q little brown blood were in
iected into IL.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
Ro,e CoebIap Keen, Out Of Court.

Rose Coghlap, the actress, disappointed
large crowd in the City Court this morning by
not appearing to tell the Judge why he ought
not to fine her for contempt. Miss Coghlan
and the Fourth National Bank have been fight
ing each other In the courts for some time.
The last two dates set for trial were inconve-
nient for Miss Coghlan, and she failed to ap-
pear. Her doctor swore that she was very i'll
Of tonsilitis, but as she played her parts on the
stage in the meantime, the Judge thought she
was nbbing, and at the instance Of the bank
threatened her with q fine for contempt. The
bank and Miss Coghlan settled their dispute
last night, and the whole matter dropped out
of courf
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18

From the Courier-JourAal.i
t. considereda curious fact that no deaf
man has ever Joined IN the cry that marriage
is . failuren
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
Consul Jarrett and Arthur.

John Jarrett had not last evening received
official notification Of his appointment as Con-
sui to Birmingham, but expects it to-day. Mr..
Jarrett, It is recalled, was appointed to q Con-
sulate by the late President Arthur, who soon
afterward revoked the appointment on hearing
It reported that Mr.. Jarrett had said he
was better fitted to be q scullion at Delmonico's
than President of the United States. Mr.. Jarrett
visited Mr.. Arthur and told him he had not
said that ct ALL but had declared him better
fitted to preside at Delmonico's than to be
President. Mr.. Arthur thought this bad
enough, and didn't revoke the revocation. One
cannot but admire Mr.. Jarrett for the manly
way in which he stood by what he had said,
even though one may not concur In the judg-
mant
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-05-18
TALK OF TIE GOTHAMITES.
A er.ss Holiday for The serw.sian..

INV roRK BuEEAU sFEcIALs.1
NEW YORK. May H.--The Norwegians Of the
city have had holiday to-day because 70
years ago Norway was freed from Danish rule.
They hung out national flags, and many Of the
societies gave picnics in the suburbs. This
evening they let OF fireworks in an uptown
park, and gave banquet and ball, at which
the Norwegian Consul, Christian Bors, Vice
Consul Raon and Mayor Grant were present
The morning news., 1889-05-29
Coast Line Railroad.

STEAM CARS.
CATHEDRAL CEMETERY. BJNAVENTURE
AND TlIUNDEkBOLT
CITY TIME.
THE following suburban schedule viii be oh.
i served on aud after MONDAY, April 21th.
week days see special schedule for Sunday:
Leave savannah 7.lO, 1873 A. a., 500 400.
BOO. ft45pM
ieafe rhunderbolt, 5.50 800 A. ~, 1910. $3.50.
i.au. 600 b.. g.
Leave Boaaventuro coo. sos A. A.. iq.a
all. q 30, b.fI D. M
Saturday night last car leaves city 7l5. in.
aslIOfg.tI
fuAs br9uglton street cars - minutes before
departure of Suburban trains
a. q. DRAKE, supt
The morning news., 1889-05-29
SHIPPING.
Compagnie Generate Transatantique
--French Line to Hawe.

DETwEEN New York and Havre from pier
ID No. ~, n R.. foot of Morton street Trav-
elers by this line avoid both transit by English
railway and the discomfort Of crossing the
the Company's dock at Havre direct for Paris
on arrival Of steamers. Baggage checked at
New ork through to Paris.
La BOURGOGNE, FRANGEUL. SATURDAY
June !, $50 A. NJ.
LA GASCOGNE, SANTELLG, SATURDAY, June
s, noon.
LA BRETAGNE, DEJoUssELIE, SATURDAY,
June IS, s A. NJ
PRICE OF PASSAGE Including wine):
TO HAVRE-FirSt Cabin. S120 and 500;
Second Cabin, $50; Steerage from New York to
Havre. S26; Steerage from New York to Paris,
500; including wine, bedding and utensils.
A FORGET, General Agent 3 Bowling Green.
foot Of Broadway New York.
Or r. W. HUNT, ESQ 20 Bull street, MEssRs.
WILDER & CO., 126 Bay street, Savannah
Agents.