davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1889-11-14

Mrs. Poortable-It is raining fear.
fully outside. Hadn't you better
stay and take supper with us, Mr..
Smith?
Smith-O, no Mrs. PORTABLE; the
weather can't be as bad as that.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1889-11-14

Sick headache is the bane of many lives
The annoying complaint may be cured and
prey ented by the occasional use of DR.. j.
d. McLean's Liver and Kidney Pillets
little pills.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1889-11-14
MRS. G. G. BRUMBY
Wishes to inform her patrons and friends
that she has just received her
Fall and Winter Stock Of MILLINERY,

consisting of every thing usually kept in a
first millinery store ; also nice assort>
ment of Notions. Jersey Blouses, Jersey
Jackets, Corsets, Gloves. Hosiery, &C.,
&c. She has also procured the services of
an experienced and tasty Milliner from
Baltimore, who she trusts will give entire
satisfaction.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1889-11-14

Pimples, boils and other humors. are
liable to appear when the blood gets heat.
ed. The best remedy is DR.. ]. II. Nc
Leans Sarsaparialla.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1889-11-14

No iniment is in better repute or more
widely known than DR.. J. H. McLean's
Volcanic Oil Liniment. 1t is a wonderful
remedy.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1889-11-14

Persons advanced in years feel younger
and stronger, as well as freer from the in
tirmities of age, by taking DR.. j. H. Nc
Leans Sarsaparilla.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1889-11-14

Distress after eating, heartburn, sick
headache and indigestion are cured by
DR.. j. Fl. McLeans Liver and Kidney
Pillets (little pills.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1889-11-14

IN A JUG, Rays Germicide Tor Coughs
and Consumption. Buy jug at Crosby
Drug Store.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1889-11-14
Address THE sun, New York,

@All kinds OF legal blanks and
lronclad waiver notes for sale at the
Journal Office.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1889-11-14
NEWSPAPERS FREE.

Send Your own Name and address and
those OF 8 or 10 of your friends or neigh
bors on q postal card, or otherwise and a
copy of the SAVANNAH WEEKLY
NEWS will be sent to each address free.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1889-11-14
Valuable Farm for Sale.

1926 acres. Ne have now for sale the
Mcmillan old homestead, situated two
miles West Of Acworth, on the Sandtovn
road; now in cultivation about one hun.
dred and twenty-five acres. One hundred
and seventy five acres well timbered and
twenty i've acres good pasture. There is
about seventy-fve acres OF good cotton
land on the place Well watered and con-
venient to schools and. churches. For
further particulars call on or address
d. w. DER, or
:. Acworth, Ga. r. Fl. MCMILLAN.
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1889-11-14
THE SUN.
FOR 1850
And for the Democracy.

The SUN believes that the campaign for the
election OF Democratic Congress in 1890 and a
Democratic President in 1892 should begin ON or
about the fourth of next March. THE Sun will
be on hand at the beginning and until the end of
the most interesting and important political con-
f1lct since the war, doing its honest utmost as
ever, to secure the triumph Of the Democratic
party and the permanent supremacy of the prin-
clples held by Jefferson Jackson and Tilden
The great fact of the year is the return to abso-
lute power OF the common enemy of all good
Democrats-the polical organization for whose
overthrow THE Sun fought at the front for fifteen
|. years, the memorable years of Grant and the
FRAUD hayes and Garfield and Arthur
IL is the same old enemy that Democrats now
confront, and he will be intrenched in tLe same
strong position. 1t has been carried once nv
brave and hopeful fighting. Do you not believe
Wait and see! " "e"tN'
The hope of the Democracy is in the loval
EFFORTS OF united press, cherishing no memories
OF past differences in non-essentials forgetting
everything but the lessons of experience and
| that! victory is q duty. ~ "N'
PROBABLY you know The SUN already as
newspaper which gets all the news and prints il
IN lncomparably interesting shape: which
chronicles facts as they occur and tells the truth
ABOUT men ana events with absolute fearlessness
making the completest and most entertaining
Iournal published anywhere on earth: and which
sels us opinions only to Its subscribers and pur
en1seIs At Two cents per copy---on SUNDAYS four
Genus. II you do not know the Sun, send for il
ana learn what wonderful thing 1t is to be in the
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1889-11-14

Give The JOURNAL your orders for job
printing. We are doing frst-class work at
bottom figures. Then there is solid satisfac
ton in patroRizing home institution you
knew
The Marietta journal. [volume] (Marietta, Ga.) 1866-1909, 1889-11-14
THE WEEKLY NEWS

r Is a Buslnes$ and Family Newspaper
Jor country ReaderS. 1t is the largest
weekly published in the south-l6 large
pages 1t is splendidly gotten up and
carefully edited If you have never seen
copy OF It send for one and you will pro-
nounce 1t the biggest and Lest newspaper
you ever read. Address Ni'O'
THE WEEKLY NEWS
Saw Ga,
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1889-06-08

There was a meeting of the preachers of
,.vnchburg, Va, and when it was breaking
up DIR. John Harmon could not find lis hat.
Turning to the Rev. r. r. AGREE, he said:
zone of your Baptists has my hat"
Then" said Brother AGREE, your hat has
more brains in it than ever before"
few days afser that DR.. Harmon was
passing by Brother AGREES yard gate, and
when urgei 70 come in, he said:
Il am on my way to preach
"You CANT preach" replied Brother AGREE
$50 felt for "A long time" replied DR.. Han
Ion; "but since hearing YOU the other day
have changed my mind. Richmond Re
EriOus Herald
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1889-06-08
Nearly as Good as Mark rwain's Frog.

Nearly as Good as Mark Twain's Frog.
An old gentleman at Tewl,esbury for many
years rode blind horse. Though sightless,
the steed, which had probably been a good
fencer once, had learned to jump whenever
he received hint that he was desired 70 do
so. One day, after n run with the hounds,
some hunting men were talking in the bar of
a hotel about big jumps, and the owner of
the blind horse Stoutly maintained that that
animal would jump over a single obstacle
which none oftheir hun ters would leap He
was ready 20 back his words with money,
and as the result Of the conversation he made
Four bets Of - each on the subject. Very
boon the four spOrtsmen repented of risking
their money rashly. The owner Of the
blind horse put down a straw in the street,
and this constituted the obstacle" He rode
up 20 it, and the blind steed, responding TO
his call, rose at the rasper," clearing it with
a bound four feet in the air. and covering
twelve feet Of ground at least. None of the
other four horses would rise at a straw, and
the owner of the blind horse was e20 richer
Court Journal.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1889-06-08
Extraordinary Fire Tests.
TULARE, CAL, August 10, 1856,

Halls SAFE & Lock Co:
GENTs-Doubtless you are acquainted
with the facts of the recent fire which COM
pletely destroyed the business portion OF
our town. We wish you could see the Safe
we just bought of you.
1t was opened with difficulty, because the
outer sheets of both doors were badly
warped, and the bolts would not turn, but
the combination Is in perfect order, and by
using a wrench we opened the bolts by the
Combination.
The inside doors, and cabinet work, and
everything inside is in perfect order.
1t is pleasure to see the admiration ex-
pressed by everyone at seeing it in such
good order. We think every other Safe in
town was scOrched inside, though all the
Hall Safes are in good condition. We are
satisfied it would be to your interest to
send a salesman down at once, as nothing
but a Hall Safe will sell now.
The outer doors of ours must be repaired,
and our Safe is again new. The old one
which we sold stood it as well as before
and better than many new ones. (This
was the third fire it has passed through.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1889-06-08
Burning of the Hamilton Building.
PITTsBURG, Pa, August 20, Is

PITTsBURG, Pa, August 70, 1887
HALLS SAFE & LOCK Co., Cincinnati, o
GENTLEMEN-In the recent great & J,
which consumed the Hamilton Building of
this city, we had in Onr office one of your
No. 10 Safes, containing our books and &C
counts and many valuable papers, con-
tracts, deeds, etc. The Safe fell from the
sixth floor with doors down. 1t lay in the
ruins five days and took eight hours to dig
out. In order to get into it, the back had
to be cut out and to our great satisfaction
we found the contents in PERFECT ORDER,
being uninjured either by fire or water.
The contents were in better shape than
that of any other in the buiSE'iiIfE- Tease
advise what similar Safe will cost fob.
Pittsburg. (Sig), JAS. GARDNER, JR.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1889-06-08
Would be pleased to see or hear from you.
Yours truly,
A. T. CoTToN

The above was a Halls No. 90 Double
Door Safe, and was burned in the great
fire which destroyed the whole business
portion of the town of Tulare on the night
of August 10, 1886.
AS stated in the above letter, all the
He'll Safes in the fire, (and there were
many of them,) preserved their contents
in good condition, and the same can be
said of every fire that has occurred i'll
California or elsewhere.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1889-06-08
He NIpst Have Been am umpire.

During a thunder storm recently in town
up in New York state man hurrying 10 a
shelter was knocked senselesS by a flash of
lightning. He was taken into a hotel, and
after he had been labored with for some time
he recovered. Struggling 10 his feet he galed
upon the anxious faces surrounding him, and
remarked with an air of severity: Gentle
men, if order has been restored, we will pro
coed with the game. "-PittSburg Dispatch.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1889-06-08

o.. II. w alker,
latiC and Consular Rep
NAME.
His Elk. Hon. II. A. P. Carter
3. H. Allen,
D. A. Mckinley,
Lawrence Bond,
John McCraken,
James q. Swan,
Col. w. J. De Gress,
Anastatio Obregon,
Robert James Barney,
David Thomas,
r. II. Beddy,
5ylvanus Crosby,
Henry E. Cooke,
Henry Tolke,
Conrad Hughes,
A. MarengO,
Abraham Hoffnung,
B. Francis Hoffnung,
Hopkins,
Harold Janion.
Mark Whitwell,
w. Moran,
L. Biesterfeldt,
w. S. Broad,
F. W. Prescott,
Hyam Goldberg,
E. G. Buchanan,
James Dunn,
J. q. Zoller,
II. j. Murphy,
G. b. Dawson,
w. A. Ross,
G. Elliot Anderson,
Dickson Anderson,
Col. Geo. A. Shaw,
j. d. Buell.,
A. Brown,
G. Richardson,
j. \. Pouliot, Q. c.,
A. .. CroOkshank,
E. F. Clements,
Il. 2. Rithet,
Ernest o. Smith,
IL. Z. Stokes,
Captain 6. n. Oakley,
A. b. Webster,
Captain Hon. A. Coete,
Geo. Collins,
d. b. Cruickshank,
h. Driver,
Hon. J. Bell Irving,
j. j. Keswick,
II. SchOtt,
Alfred Houl6,
A. Couve,
Z. de BOissac,
20. Schaessler,
j. T. Cognet
E. F. Weber,
J. +. Muller,
J. Kopp,
A. =. Russ,
II. Muller,
Z. Mineuez,
g. Scham,
". Chust,
F. Z. De Navarro,
j. Paris,
F.. L. Falcon y Quevedo,
J. b. De Laguna,
. B. Matthew y Battaller,
"A. F. De Serpa,
I n. L. Nj. ZERO,
j. Hutchinson,
/ r. Seeman,
&c. Martins,
y. Clinton Hooker,
r.. De Luchi,
Il. Colombo,
a. Tagliavia,
y. D. van der Made, P. r. Z
Victor Forge,
Z. Coppieters,
j. Blanpain,
E. Vanden Brande,
H. A. Burger,
l.. Samson,
H. BergstrOm,
6. Kraak,
v. Won Sch0nberger,
j. Holmblad,
His Excellency 4. w. Irwin
S. EndicOtt,
d. H. Schmull,
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1889-06-08
a Sure Cure.

The Medical Record discusses the question,
How to sleeps' and gives long, scientihs
formula for inducing sleep. What's the mat
sscr Wit. -. '.,.- to churchR--Burdetts
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1889-06-08

Mobile has n brass band with cc:.ec.se.''---
1t goes out in the suburbs on a Sunday and
hides itself in the woods to practice. AT a
distance of two or three miles the music Il
simply enchanting.-Mobile Register.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1889-06-08

r. Minister Resident e dA Charge dAfairs; Diplomatic
CoInlssoner; o. o. Consul General c. A,
G.. Consul; A. c. Acting Consul; '. c.. Vice Consul.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1889-06-08

GREAT BRITAIN,
.--
DipIO.
COUNTRY.
UNITED STATES.
Washin gton, ID. G.
New York,
San Francisco,
Boston,
Portland, O.,
Port Townsend,
Philadelphia,
MEXICO,
Mexico,
ManZanillO,
CENTRAL & SOUTH
AMERICA.
Valparaiso,
Lima,
CallaO,
Colon,
Guatemala,
Monte VideO,
Assumption,
GREAT BRITAIN IL
IRELAND.
London,
Liverpool,
Bristol,
Hull,
Newcastle on
Tyne,
Falmouth,
Dover and the
Cirque Ports,
Cardiff 81 Swan
sea,
Edinburgh and
Leith,
Glasgow,
Dundee.
Dublin,
Queenstown,
Cork,
Belfast,
CANADA.
Ottawa,
Montreal,
Toronto,
Rockville, Ont,
Hamilton, Ont,
Kingstown, Ont.
Rimouski, O.,
st. Johns, n. B,
| Halifax, n. S.,
Yarmouth, n. S,
! Victoria, B. c.,
| Vancouver, b. G,
| AUSTRALASIA.
! Sydney, n. S. w,
| Newcastle, "
| Melbourne, Vict
| brisbane, O.,
| Hobart, Tas.,
Launceston, Tas
| Auckland, n. T..
Dunedin, n. l..
HONGKONG,
SHANGHAI,
! GIBRALTAR,
FRANCE i Colo
MES.
Paris,
Marseilles,
Bordeaux,
ROuen,
SOCIETY GROUP.
Papeete, Tahiti,
GERMANY 4 COLC
MES.
Berlin,
Hamburg,
Bremen,
FraukfOrt-On-
Maine,
Dresden,
Karlsruhe,
SPAIN & COLONIES
Madrid,
Barcelona,
CadlZ.
Valencia,
Malaga,
Carta gena,
CANARY ISLANDS.
Las Palmas,
Santa Cruz de ]
HalEna,
PORTUGAL 81 coz
MES.
Lisbon,
OportO,
Nf.Ici-a
St. Michaels,
st. Vincent,
ITALY.
Rome,
Genoa,
Napier,
Palermo,
NETHERLANDS.
Amsterdam,
Dordrecht,
BELGIUM.
Antwerp,
Client,
Liege,
Bruges,
SWEDEN u NORwA
Stockholm,
Christiania,
Lyskil,
Gothemburg,
AUSTRIA.
Vienna,
DENMABK.
Copenhagen,
JAPAN.
Toxic,
HiogO il Osaka
SOUTH AFRICAN
REPUBLIC.
Pretoria,
The Dali
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1889-06-08

The newest craze in Nav York city is for
white furniture.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1889-06-08
General Embellishments.

HE. GEO. w. LINCOLN,
IN THE FIELD
| and all xmas Oh Won
belonging to ms trad
Same iandw
dsr do and all KINDS OF
bull naybe
al dull h s"Nhe '
all worth dong Well
Thanking The public fayors
/ remain respec
w. LINCOLN
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

l felt (on certain occasion) like
the drunken Irishman who got up at
the wrong time in prayer meeting.
The parson asked all those who loved
the Lord to please stand. Everybody
in the house stood except this Irish
man, who was asleep. The minister e
eye caught the unlucky man.
"Now," he thundered, II want those
who don't love the Lord to stand"
The Irishman had partly come to
his senses, and not fully grasping the
situation, sprung to his feet, thinking
the others in the congregation would
follow. But staring about him and
seeing every man and woman seated
but himself, he looked at the minister
and exclaimed
"Parson (hic). YOU an are in a
very (hic) shmall minority, amt we!''
-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

mistake. Our Jim may hev mistook.
He'un tells a smooth story, and it may
be right. It hain't but four miles
back to Dobson's. whar he says he
took supper, and one of ye should ride
over"
The men grumbled and growled,
but it was finally decided that one of
them should go. was seated on a
rude stool, the rope tied fast about
my legs, and we sat there to await the
return of the messenger. Jim was
questioned again and again, but he
stuck to his first declaration. could
give them my route for the past three
weeks, and the name Of every town,
village and cove, and l had letters to
prove that | had been to those places.
But for young Jim being SO sure of
my identity, I could have convinced
them. They were doing the fair thing
however, by sending messenger back
and l had no fear of the result. It was
daylight before he returned, and he
had two men with him. During the
interval was examined, cross-exam-
ined and turned wrong side out. The
greatest doubter was an old man who
had lost his two mules.
Look at he'un," he exclaimed,
pointing at me as / sat there. Look
at the build of his head-look on his
face-them suspiShus eyes. He might
fule young man, but he needn't try
it on me. Whar's my nevis, ye on
cry villain?
Ten minutes after the men rode up
l was cast loose and apologized to. !
could realize how naturally the mis-
take came about, and the men were
not to blame. 1t was all right with
everybody except with young Jim and
the old man. The latter had Dragged
Of his cuteness and his defeat annoy.
ed him. He went off shaking his
head and predicting that I was up to
some trick. l had forgotten the boy
when. half an hour after breakfast, !
heard terrible racket behind the
corn-crib. Word came that / was
wanted, and | went out to find Jim
tied by the leg and his father trim.
ming the second gad.
"Now, sonny" said the father as he
got ready to use it, take a good look
at that ere stump beto' ye. Two days
hence yc may be axed to identify it,
and ye may swear up and down that
it's blooming CHEEKY tree You
jist come powerful nigh O. gettin' all
this cove in scrape, and I'm a.going
to improve your eyesigbt"
And jim received the incest, most
thorough and lasting licking ever Civ.
en- to a boy south Of the Ohio River.
M. Quad in Detroit Free Press.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20
COnsusn ptiOn surely Cured.

10 THE EDIroR-Please inform your
readers that have u positive remedy for
the above named disease. BY It's timely
use thousands Of hopeless cases have beef
permantutly cnred. shall be glad To send
two bottles Of my remedy free To any Of
your readers who have consumption u
they will send me their express AMI post
oflire address. Respectfully. T. A SLO.
CUM, NJ. O., lSl Pearl ST., New York.
So9yl
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

Why, Nettie, you have put youl
shoes on the wrong feet.
What will do, mamma? They''
all the feet l have got.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

Precautionary measures. Minister
(from the pulpit)-As the air of the
church seems chilly, I would ask the
sexton if he will kindly close the front
doors and windows of the building
The collection will now be taken up
Eek.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

Theatrical dre.smak er-Wl at, this
dress too low in the necki Why, il
isn't half so low as the dresses of the
ladies who occupy the boxes.
Actress-True, but an actress must
pay some regard to the proprieties,
you know -Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

lawyer have my opinion of you.
Citizen-Well, you can keep it.
The last opinion I got from you cost
me S150.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

Waitress at a Washington houle-
ward boarding house-We have oys-
ter soup to-day, Mr.. Simmels.
Simmels-Give me some. And say
remember that it's my turn to get
the oyster. l come after Dibble, and
he got it the last time.-Chicago Her
ald
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

Claud Howard de We're Ito fellow
tragedian)-St. Clair, allow me to in
troduce to you my brother, Pat Bra
dy.-New York Sun.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

Mother-Whom do you think baby
resemblesi
Uncle-It HAS its fathers nose.
And my mouth.
Yes, fact; and / also notice that
with papa's nose and mammals mouth
it leaves precious little room for fore.
head.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

Miss Oldham (who is not us young
as she used to be)-Speaking of fine
lace, Mr.. Crackson, here is lace
handkerchief made expressly for me
ON my sixteenth birthday.
Mr.. Crackson (gallantly)-Simply
beautiful Ah, Miss Oldham, one
sees nothing so fine as that nowadays.
Things were made much better in
those good old times, weren't they g.
Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

A great many girls say no at first
but like the photographer, they know
how to retouch their negatives.-Puck.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

A bore is like the traditional hoop
snake--usually has long tale of him.
self in his mouth.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

Hostess-Do take some more of this
pudding. Mr.. Snibbins.
Snibbins-My dear Mrs. Bounder-
by, l couldn't eat another mouthful.
I've eaten so much already that I can
hardly speak.
Do try little mors--just a little
more, if only to please me, Mr.. Snib
bins.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20
Advertising Rates.

bosins's CArda one year. one dollar per line.
LSod notiovs, among local rcadi n mStt-r. lsn
ents per lia4 frr each insertion.
b"''ness n''ices nvs cents per limo saeh insertion.
births. Marriages ani deaths free.
Obituaries, Resolutlon-. Cards Of Thaais, eta,
81 sdTcrtisips rates.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

A western horse-thief is like a vio'
lin in being its best when strung up
-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

Rayner-Chokeband, why don't you
come around and join our club? You
have had invitations enough.
Chokeband-I know it, but I'm
afraid it's an intellectual affair.
Rayner-Oh, no. it isn't. You
wouldn't feel out of place in the least
-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

"ConfouDd it all !" said Smith,
"there comes Bones, and / owe him SO.
He'll ask me for it sure"
"I'll tell you what to do" suggest
ed Smiths friend. "Just take a drink
out of that street fountain"
How will that prevent him from
asking me for the money!"
He'll think you haven't got any"
IN. Y. Sun.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

A dress for the burglar-a sack
Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

No time to lose. Tired lady (who
has been hopelessly waiting for her
change in a mammoth store Miss
lie Clerk (!
Clerk-Yes, madam,
Won't you please try to hurry up
my bundle and changer l am anx.
ious to have that piece Of bargain
goods made up before it gets out OF
fashion.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

In a Bowery restaurant Vocifer-
Gus waiter-Two pies an puddin'-
two coffees
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20
MICHIGAN CENTRAL
"The Niagara Falls Route"
.r.... c..a A., ENaot

sDaily. tDaily except Saturday. All other
trains daily except sunday. Parlor oars on day
J. WHITING. Ticket Agent.
O. w. RUdGLEa, @. p. 7. Agt.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

Winks-I see that Russian bank
er has left almost $5,000,0OO to pi.
anist named Sophie Mentor.
Miss Blinks this next door neigh
bor)-lsn't that nice2 I wonder il
any one will leave me anything when
] become a great performer. Did the
paper say why he left it her?
No, but / suspect she always closed
the windows and used the soft pedals
when practicing. ng.-Philadelphia Call.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20
WIT AND HUM0R.

For the dude-dol-man.--Ra
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-03-20

Afrighted Teutonic patron-P'ison
for two, poodt in two cofins! Mein
Gott! l gets me oudt New York
Herald,