The Washington critic., 1889-03-21
PRIZE CONUNDRUM CONTEST,

All classes of people are contributing to
THE CRITIc's conundrum column and the
contest is becoming decidedly curious and
interesting. AS announced the prize
of $5 lie for the best lot Of orlgi-
nal conundrums with their answers, to
to be sent in to this Office before April |.
These will be given daily. The conundrums
may be sent in at any time--the sooner the
better. The award will be made by
Mr. w. j. hampton of The Critic
editorial staff. The prize offered is insignif-
cant, but the contest is droll and It is
hoped THE CnITIc's readers will continue
to enter into IL heartily for the amusement
1t will afford. Here are another lot:
A Carnival of (verbai) Crime.
Well, Bones, hab you seed de CRIrIo's
Conundrum Column yitY
Yes, Jake; dcy's jolly aint dey9
Yes, dey's berry gud, but kin beat 'em
Sho, go long Glib us one.
What's de difference tween de Secretary
oh State an President Harrisonp
dunno. What is II p
De Secretary am de Maine statesman an
de President am de States main man.
Glib us anoder9
Why wus Secretary OBJ do Treasury
Gresham like President Harrison's grand
fadderp
OATS anoder Cabinet puddin'.
Kase he wus ofen seed wifi Hat (t) on
an in cabin ate (Cabinet).
Dem'e rich. Glib us sum mo-.
called on de Sec. OBJ State de oder
day, an gin him one. sed to him: "Ef
you shud 60 out an git wet why wud you
be like me" But he had to glib it up.
An what did you say9
Kase, sed l., you would hab q chill
Blaine. Dat got me four weeks at dc
'Mergency, whar was glued togedder, an
when cum out wus egzackly like my
hew gal.
How's datP .~ sf3 ~
| / wus SO stuck up. Say, what's the diff
ference tween de representative oh dc
Spanish Gubment an ole maid frum
Bangore
Glib 1t up.
Kase one is minister frum Spain an de
oder is a spinster frum Maine. Here's
anoder. Why am de CRITIc's debbil
chasin' de offs cat like dat nife on de
EDITORS desk9
Dunno. Why am hep
Kase he's an inky racer. Ink eraser.l
Dat'll do. what's becum oh dat hash
mixer down to yo uncle Bob's soup
factory
o, he skipped wild de plate las week.
Say, he aint like useful piece OBJ furnl-
ture, is he2
No, oh course not. One am book
case an de oder am a cook base.
Now, dat reminds me. What's de differ
ence tween an artists workshop an de
place whar you gifts yo' closer
Why, see hyar. / don't git my close IN
an attic. gifts 'em In 'spectable place
on d street.
Yes, nose dat. One is studio an de
udder is Jew sto'.
Now why is desc conundrums like dat s.
spent las mite
Well, dey amt WORT So, no.
Kase I'll nebber see 'em agin.
Now you is jist like q feller asleep.
How so
Kaseyo am bof liers.
Den, why is de WORT OBJ desc conundrums
like de policeman what will be sent to ar
res me fur writin' 'emf
Can't tell 4N
Kase it's iis' copper sent.
| what's de difference tween de "hold
| obcrs'' and de dances at President Harrl
| sons Inauguration BallY
Kase dey's swell enuf, reckon dey mus
be jis' alike. a 't-i afHs
| No, dey aint. Kase de ''holdovers'' dur
well, and de dances wus we'll dun. Now
den. Why's de 'capitated District Assesso
like de snow dis mornin'Y
4 Kase he can't be missed (mist.)
Good day
| So long. Say, WHY'S yo' back like m.
/ gals faceP
Kase it's black, guess.
| No, kase ] am glad to see 1t.
i "THR HowLET."
O-deai
What organ of sense Is also the founda