Morning journal and courier., 1889-12-13
GOOD.

Time is money, but good deal of it is about as valuable as Confederate currency.- Puck.
 Speech ia silver, and silver is likely to mean speech in Congress this session. - Lowell Courier.
 Tho season of doughnut socials and grand opera in this city is opening very suspicious ly.-Chisago News.
 A popular man is usually what he is called, but popular subscription is usually very unpopular.-St. Louis Republic.
 The reported breach between the Atlantic cable companies is denied. Their relations arc entirely ami-cable. Boston Herald.
 It Is strange fact in nature that the total ly blind man possesses the keenest power of vision. He can see nothing. Gray & Go. g Monthly.
 Stranger Gin dime museum)- )-Say, where's the walkin' match you advertised? Manager See the livin' skeleton over theref "Yep." Well, that's him. ."-Time.
 There is considerable difference between the sober man and the "man who frequently smiles," but 1t is the sober man who has the best reason for smiling, Boston Courier.
 It is proposed, when another arctic search expedition is organized, to send rescaing party along with it. This is much better than the old style.-Atlanta Constitution.
 "Yes, sir," said . man with grudqe against the orator of the day; ''his speech was funny enough to make donkey laugh. laughed till cried. d."-Philadelphia Times. One dozen large pumpkin pies were car- ried into the White House on the day before Thanksgiving and now they are missing from the Executive pantry. Can the President prove an alibi!-Chicago News. In court.-"How comes 1t that yeu com kkaI rohharv in, oco dA1 atraak in full daylighta" eff your honor please, be- cause had laid out some other streets for l the evening. g."-Fliegends Blatter. The Last Resort -Torsorial Artist (con- Itemptuously)- -'sssyi what good are you liar ball, yer can't play base ball, yer can't row; all yer can do is to get an education. ."-Har- 1 yard Lampoon.
 Feminine Reasoning.-"Little sister in 1 railroad car-''How long this tunnel is!" | Sweet girl graduats-"It seems so, dear, be-
 cause this is the last car, you know. and of course all the rest go out before we do."- l Fliegende Blatter.
 New to the Game-M Massey Schott-"Say, George, how have you been counting, any
 waya' Nosll-"Why, when you made shot l moved one of the little checkers out on the 1 wire, and then when English made one, l
 moved 1t back sgain."-Puck. | AL, 1y uehf Arieuu, uoue Uo oAcuuSu that my husband was not at your brothers l funeral, but to tell the truth he has such a
 very comioal way of walking that he has I found it is out of the question for him ever
 to go to funeral. ."-Fftegende Blstter. "Who reported yesterday's service at St.. 1 Pster'sa" Bronson" "The dramatic critic,' "Yes." "WelI, that accounts for 1t. He says that in the absence of the Rev.
 Dr. Dinwiddle his understudy, the Rev. MT.
 Harkins, delivered the sermon. Life. l At recent examination of California
 schoolma'ams, one of them wrote in answer | to question of discipline: "Capital pun.
 ishment should not be rssorted to except on
 rare occasions, only with the consent of the
 parents, and never till the next day."- l Springfield Republican.