The National tribune., 1889-05-02
PADDY's POI CASE.
No PInsions for Poi.Rnitsrz.

Gen. B., a armed veteran Of the war, was
sitting in his Office one day when there came a
timid rap at his door.
Gomez" called out the officer in his prompt
military way. The door opened and disclosed
the figure of an Irishmam, shabby and i'll at
ease, his clothes fitting him like yard of can
vas on picket-fence.
The visitor made an awkward attempt at a
military salute, and twirling his siouch hat sat
gingerly down on the edge of a chair
Z" What can / do for you, my man?" asked
the General kindly, as his eye fell upon the
army blue.
"Bedad, it amt for mesilf OFm AKIN it!"
For friend?"
"OxaCtly, sor! Yez see, it was a peculiar
keSs, sor, an It's a pinSiOn Dim afther!"
"Whose pension2"
"a pinsion for the wildly of Paddy Magin-
nis-pace to his soWl!"
"What is the trouble about getting the
widow pensiOn?"
"WeII. sor, some sez that Paddy's disability
was not incurred in the loin av july, sor :"
Estate your case, and l can advise you better
afterwards"
"Yis, sor; thank ye Gnerl Here goes,
sor! 1t was this way: 1t was whiu we was
layin' aroun' Fredericksburg, sOr, wild moity
slim rations, sor, that we med Oop our mOiuds
that we mus git SOON eatables SOON place aT
'nuther, an Paddy Maginnis, he SEE t. me, SEE
g, Mickey, Dim that Imply that Oh could walk
trough a crack widout techiu' ayther side,
sez Q. Paddy was a gret by fur his joke
was Paddy. viii, sez Oh lets skirmsh
aroun' on the outskirts, SEE Oh, an mebbe
we kin stroke bOnan3y, sez Oh. viii, sOr
we did. just outside aY camp we NIT an
ole crather seliin' wat she called sYate
petaty poi an Paddy guy er a dollar shin
plaster for coOple! Well, sor, that night
Paddy Maginnis was took that sick wild his
stomich that l niVer seen the bate av it; an
was moighty sick mesilf, bedad; an by the
tOim Paddy had lived till m0rnin' he was dead
as a sardyuel Well, sor, Paddy had big fam
lily an nobody but their pore lettle sickly
mother t work for thim But whiniver l say
anything about Paddy's kess, Everybody begins
t. snickeF. Wan says, Thin Southern pOis
kilt more than the intire Southern musketry
or Come off wild ser poi pnsion kess =! OF
"Old man, how much tole do ye git out O
thin pOis'2
"Ginerel I tell you, sor, that no man kin
foight on an Imply STOMACH my more than he
kin work on it, An Oh insist, sor, that in
thin instances poi is just as mooch in the loin
av juty as rifles is, sor an Oh hope, sor, that
you'll excuse me for ssyin' that there is seeh
thing ez bein' too-toO-tO -tOo-ad-adieetivC
funny in pinsion mathers! (Oi niTer cuss in
the prisince ov NE superiOrs, sorI'')
s. Have you proof positive of all this?"
81 hayYe, sor!"
"The pies were poisoned to kill off the hun
cry soldiers?"
"They was, sor!"
"Well, Mr.-Mr. -"
murphy, sor"!
"Weli, 6[r. Murphy think your case i
meritorious."
"Yis, sor; does that name it's o. K.?"
"Yes, my man! And think it viii be prop
erly adjudicated. Have you been TO the Com
missioner"
"Now, sor, they sid in Hardscrabble that NJ
poi boiter would liver draw no pinsion !"
"Tll see to this matter" said the General
the corner of his mouth twitching. He did
and poor Paddy Maginnis's honest, hardwork
ing little widow got her just rights.