Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1889-06-27

nurses, but that was a small capital upon
which to start in life again. And in
deed she did not care much where sre
went if only she could get somewhere
where she could lie down. Her limbs
were stiff; she had a pain in her back,
and her brain seemed tired and sluggish.
AS she stood on the corner she read
placard on the wall advertising an ex-
cursion to the sea-shore. For one dollar
one person could go and return. AS Ag-
mes read this she half smiled. For
convalescent to go to the sea-shore was
proper and usual thing to do. And it
occurred to her that she would best go.
She would for a dollar have two long
rides, and she would see the ocean,
breathe the air. The very thought rested
and inspired her, and when the street-car
came along she got into it with some
spirit, making up her mind where to go
for lodgings for the night.
Early the next morning she went to
the wharf, bought her ticket, and crossed
by the ferry to the railroad station. 1t
was clear sunny morning in early sum-
mer, and the river was all freshness and
glitter, and the islands which lay in the
middle of it were green and beautiful.
The trees hung over, looking into the
water, and the gulls sailed ahead of the
boat. To be in the midst of people bent
upon holiday, to be in motion and out
in the air, and so be going somewhere,
made Agnes feel as though she were out
of her mind, and that she must pinch her
self and make sure her sensations were
normal
But after she had been in the train for
an hour her excitement went away, and
she sank into her usual depression, yet
not into her usual quiescent mood. She
had during her illness bound herself to
certain task, and she meant now to per-
form it. In the night this had come to
her-that the time, the opportunity, had
now arrived, and this was to be done.
1t was no new thought. Before she was
ill it had been poor comfort lying
ahead, and in the hospital she had silently
reflected upon it day and night. The
only question was how she should do
it. She knew how much trouble and
gossip there always was in the miserable
houses where she must live, and she also
knew that if she died in one of them, and
the alarm was spread, and the police and
the coroner called in, that her history
would be canvassed, and her family hear
it all. And she also thought of the peo-
pie who might keep the house in which
she should die, and that they might find
it a loss to have lodger kill herself -
one of their rooms.
But to drown herself in the sea-, and to
be swept out into the waste of waters,
and only God and the angels know-tha5
contented her, and took away all her PEI
plexities; because when one has an imao!-
nation and comprehension of details anu
some thought of others, it is not entirely
easy to decide upon how it is best to di
there always being some complex diffic'
ties in the matter. Being woman,
had naturally thought of poison, but il
not easy to select a poison. Agnes q
not want to die in torture; the ve;..
thought of this was horrible to her. Ste
had suffered so much that she thought
death as relief, and to make it anoth
agony was impossible. But if she
this thing she wanted to do it surely,
make no mistake; and who can be 81
of q narcotic? She had known of MOI.
than one miserable creature who by force
and the skill of doctors had been brought
back to life. Her escape should not thus
be hindered. To shoot or to hang her
self was impossible to her. But to go
away silently and quietly and trouble no
one, that seemed to her a most fitting and
proper thing to do.
And so, having come to the end of all
she knew, and seeing nothing before her,
she believed that the time had come for
her departure, and she went on to her
destined place without any desperate
feeling whatever. There was perhaps no
one on the excursion who was more quiet
than Agnes; and she even smiled, being
amused because she had in her pocket a
return ticket She was noticed by every
one near her as being so forlornly unlike
the others; she was alone, and, it was
easy to see, was both poor and sick.
But no one guessed how tranquil and
content she was, feeling as she did that
sleep was awaiting her. As for the here
after, she had no fear whatever, being
quite sure that her Father knew how
wretched was her life and how useless.
In some other world there might be both
happiness and work for her, and to it she
would go.
When she reached the sea-shore she
stopped at store, bought some bread,
and then wandered away by the beach,
and watched the tide go out and then
come in. The sky shone over it all, and
the fresh winds blew on her thin and
sunken cheeks; but no one disturbed
her, and the day was quiet and very sa-
cred to her. 1t was not hasty leave
that she was taking of her life, and she
could not be sorry to be gone, although
it was bitter, bitter to feel that she must
do it, when there was so many happy
people who would awake with the morr-
ing.
IN the late twilight some boys ran past
the little house where Martha Clarkson
lived, and stopped just long enough to
call in that jim had been out and brought
woman in. Mrs. Clarkson laid down
the match she had lighted, put back the