Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-03-03

cluded without great mental strain that Mr..
and Mrs. Harrison ought to be in 1t. The
next determination arrived at was that Gov
ernor Hill and Mayor Grant should be In
cluded.
M'ALLISTER's DILEMMA.
Then the perplexity intervened in his cal
culations. A few days ago he relieved him
self little further by deciding that Vice
President Morton and his wife ought to be
comprised in that quadrille. Thus he found
himself provided with the four requisite
gentlemen, but with two vacant places for
ladies. Yesterday he wrote formal letter
to Mrs. Grover Cleveland asking her to take
one of these two positions. / suppose there
is not much doubt about her acquiescerce.
1t is understood that she iscoming to New
York soon after her retirement from the
White House, and that she will be received
into our most pretentious society. Indeed,
there has been no undetermined question in
that matter. Her close relations with Mrs.
Whitney, her personal good looks and win
someness, and her ardent desire to partici-
pate in New York fashionable life, all COM
bine to assure the lady to our swell circles.
Those who ought to know say that she has
both the disposition and the power to be-
come socially conspicuous here. But as to
brain whether to assign her as a. partner to
the Governor or to the Mayor. There is no
love lost between Cleveland and Hill, and
during the last year that they were together
at Albany as Governor and Lieutenant
Governor they had no social intercourse
with each other.
HER HUSBANDS ENEMY.
But McAllister says to himself that Mr..
Hill and Mrs. Cleveland might dance ami
cably together for few minutes, notwith-
standing the husbands dislike of the bach
elor; and McAllister hasn't thought that
way for more than an hour before his mind
swims over to the other idea that it would
be better to mate Mrs. Cleveland with
Mayor Grant.
The fourth lady in the set is almost GER
tnin to be Mrs. William Astor. But she is
not the first choice of McAllister, nor the
second, but only the third. Mrs Ulysses
S. Grant and Mrs. Rutherford B. Hayes as
wives of Presidents, were invited by him,
but both have declined, on the ground that
they are not habitual dancers. Mrs. Nellie
Grant Sartoris is visiting her mother, who
made a remark which was construed as
| suggestion that the daughter be asked, but
nothing has come of it. Mrs. Astor is aware
of the situation, but she is not at all resent
full, and intimates that she will willingly
accept the place. The reader doesn't deem
this momentous topic? Well, Ward Nc
Allister is of a different opinion.
AN ACTRESS CHASER.
The amusement at the theater where the
London burlesquers are performing was ex-
tended, the other evening, to one of the
lower proscenium boxes, where the exhibit
of actress-chasers was comical. In the cor
ner, so close to the stage picture that he was
practically a part of it, and with his
countenance turned half way to the assem-
blage was one of the funniest little dudes
ever seen. His face was as smooth and
pudgy as an infants, and quite as void of
| guile. His curly hair and suggestion of
mustache were as yellow as the wigs of the
stage women. He wore white kid gloves
the only pair on male hands in the thearer;
and probably he had lately swallowed as
much as half glass of champagne, for he
was visibly exhilarated.
His ogling of the stage. beauties, his
knowing glances at the audience, and his
whole expression of very mild deviltry,
| kept the observers tittering. As to the
I actresses, they did not conceal their amused
contempt for what they would have called
a Johnny" He was the son of rich
man, and no doubt has spent money freely
on these same women, who accept his re-
treshments and then treat him contemptu-
ously.
AN ACTRESS CATCHER.
Among the half dozen other occupants of
the box was one singular creature, who kept
as far as possible out of sight, but who 1
was enabled from my opposite box seat to
study interestedly. He was a misshapen
dwarf, almost as tall as the other chaps
when he sat in the chair, but not much more
than halt their height when on his feet,
for his legs were proportionate-
ly small section of his figure.
His hands had five fingers apiece, besides
the thumb, and the extra finger was not an
excrescence. but equal in size and proper
tion to the rest. His shoes were big enough
to hold six-toed feet, and doubtless they did.
Now, this malformed fellow was neither
rich nor socially pretentious. His name was
Henry Ralph, and he was the Little Itch
OF the stage-a grotesque dancer, whom you
may have seen.
The party of young town FOUNDERS had
found Little Itch an entertaining COM
panion, Tor he is witty on his own account.
as well as ludicrous in his public perform.
ances. Now, while the curled and gilded
darling of wealth, whom have described.
was butt for the merry burlesquers, this
dwarfsh and fantastic Little Itch had re-
Gently won the heart of Laura Brooks.
beauty of the burlesque. They had been
thrown together professionally, had fallen
in love with each other, and had been regu-
larly Joined in wedlock. Women are
peculiar. But who shall say that of the
two occupants of the box Little Itch would
not be more endurable husband than the
brsinless pretty fellow?