Arizona weekly enterprise., 1889-03-16
MIR. BoWsER's THEORIES.
Mrs. Bowser Gives an Account of His ES
 periments.

tenance wearing 0 very important look, and the first thing be did was to bolt up stairs to our bedroom and lower the window, although had just closed it after airing the room for two hours. He then came clattering down to ask me for pan.
 "What on earth do you want of panP' asked.
 ''To save all our Hvesi" he answered
 "HowF"
 "Your bedroom is full of poisonous gases, which must be absorbed by an open vessel of water" "Nonsensel" "l expected it. That's the weapon of the ignorantI Mrs Bowser, if you want to die by poisonous gases poisoning the blood, 1 have nothing to say; but shall save the life of our child, If possible. have felt a strange lassitude for several days, and sanitary | plumber tells me that we have poisonous air l in the room"
 "Your lassitude couldn't have come from being out to club and lodge four successive nights until l2 o'clock, could iti"
 He seized the pan and hurried up stairs, and when he had filled 1t at the lavatory he sat it in the middle of the floor, and came down, with relieved look on bis face, to say:
 ''See if you don, feel better tomorrow than you have for month. It's wonder we are not all dead"
 'Did the ancieuts know about these poison ous gasesr' asked.
 Mot @ thing. They never gave them thought"
 "And yet the average of health was F per cent, above that of today, and the average of mortality that much lowerl How do you account for itl"
 "Oh, well, If you want to die go ahead I'll even buy rope and help you to hang yourself. expected this, of course, but ridi- cule never moves me, Mrs. Bowser-never."
 Two hours later he went up stairs In his slippers to look for paper in another coat, and, of course, he sat his foot plump down in that pan of water. There was yell and @ jump, and over went the pan, and when got up there he stood holding up one leg, as you have seen 0 hen do on @ wet day. What said on that occasion kept MT. Bowser very quiet for a whole week Then he began to grow restless again, and one night he brought home a suspicious looking package and sneaked 1t up stairs After supper he sud denly disappeared, and when I looked for him upstairs he had something In a basin and was about to hold 1t over gas burner.
 ''Mr. Bowser, have you got new theory, asked
 Hook here, Mrs. Bowser," he replied, as he put down the basin, "you have heard of bacteria, presume.n
 "Yes, sir"
 ''They arc the germs of disease floating about They are alive. If inhaled. cholera yellow fever and other dread diseases are the result Funigation kills them"
 And you are going to fumisate tM roomP
 q am. I am going to kill of the dreaded bacteria"
 .sINeii. yr-,,'II drivts us out of the honse ol kill us,n- -
 went down stairs and he burned com pound of tar and sulphur. In ten minute: we had to open doors and windows, and thu cook came r1nning in to ask:
 "Is it cremation MT. Bowser is trying or us2"
 1T am simply driving out bacterial he re piled, coming down the stairs at that mo nlent.
 "And there's bacteria in the houseP'
 "Tm afraid so."
 "And I've worked here four weeks undo the noses of the dreadful creaturesi Mir Bowser, quitsl quits nowr'
 And quit she did We had to sleep on tn sitting room floor last night and three week later every caller could detect that odor. , was hardly gone, however, when Mir. Bowse
  , "Any more bacteriaF' asked "Mrs. Bowser, if you want to sit here an, die have no objections, but don't propos to neglect common sense precautions to pre- serve my own health"
 ''Is anything wrong nowf" d "l think so. l think l can detect on odo 7 of sewer gas h the house." 8 Impossiblel 1 shan't have no moro stut burned until I know it is necessary" " Wont yous If there Is sewer gas hero 1 j; must be eradicated at once.n
 For the next week the entire house smelle d of chloride of lime until one could hardl e draw long breath, but MT. Bowser was nc satisfied.
 "I have been thinking" be said to me ou evening, that 1 may bring tho germs ( e some terrible disease home in my clothes. r ride on the car, you know, and l ought take precautions" e "HowP'
 "Carry disinfectant about mo to repel tt germs" k 'It might be good idea"
 'Now you are talking sense Now yo seen to understand the peril which has mel aced us" II He got something down town the next da7 think some of his friends put up job c e him, knowing bis craze. It was a compour which left him alone on the street car befol he had ridden three blocks, and he had T sooner got into the house than we had to r tire to the back doors. The cook got a sni of it, and down went the dinner and up wei her hands, and she shouted at Mir. Bowser:
 "A man as will keep skunk under his hou would beat me out of my wages, and I'll go1n LlIIs rIilnuUeI'
 It took soap and water and perfumery a1 half days time to remove the odor, al when l declared that it was the last stra
 Mir. Bowser crossed his hands under his COG = tails and replied:
 ''Mrs. Bowser, believe this house to clear of bacteria, owing to my prudence a1 self sacrifice, and want to keep it so." / ''I suppose I got 'em hereF' i, "Without doubt, madamf' "And all this rumpus has been on my a countP ''Exactly. But don't go too far with n Enough is enough. You must stop rig where you are l have humored you all propose tor'-Detroit Free Press. 7 An Interesting Controversy. :. Bobby-They were talking about you Ia 5 night, Mir. Featherly. h. MT. Featherly-Is that so, Bobby?" ed Bobby-Yes; about your being home - enough to stop CLOCK Il, Mir. Featherly Canxiously-Who said I we
 Bobbyl"
 Bobby-Ma. H. MT. Featherly much relieved-Oh, yo It maj And what did your sister Clara saya"
 Bobby-She didn't think so. O. MT. Featherly-Bless her-hm-er-did s
 think l was handsome" CT Bobby hesitatingly)- -Wen-er-n--no; s ,+ said she didn't think you could stop O cloc ,w put sne thought you nlghb make l1 Iose LII
 very fast "-Hayper's BazaH i'd ---