Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1889-03-21
Address to the Workingmen of Hereu-
laneum.

Bill Nye tells in Harper's Weekly of
recent discovery of sheets of metal in
Herculaneum, which, on being run
through n phonograph, gave forth the
following stirring speech:
"Fellow-citizens and workingmen OF
Herculaneum, 1t has been my desire for
some time to address the laboring class
es of this district in order the more
fully to give them an idea where we
stand, and thus aid them in rapidly
making up their minds as TO what action
they should take ut the polls. Should
there be a person present, therefore,
who does not regard himself as a work
ing man, will he kindly refrain from
listening or quietly leave the hall and
give his place TO some one who has de-
veloped industrial habitsp
1.-The future of the workingman on
the south slopes of Vesuvius is the very
thing of which he should be most proud,
No toiler in Campania need be ashamed
TO have his future investigated.
us it not pleasant to hear the blows
of the hammer on every hand, provided
it is not on your own handP
"Is it not cheering TO see the farmer
going joyously a-feld bearing a crow
bar with which to pry up one corner of
the mortgage on his farm so that he
can dig his potatoes out from under it?
OF course it is. Men Of Herculaneum,
and those who may be here this eve
ming representing the Pompeiian and
Neapolitan press, let me say to you
I.4 nj, NJ I Il 10, u
ing represents the heartfelt sentiments
of our bureau. We want TO feel en-
rapport with every laboring man who
may be on the fence. We want him to
feel that he can come to us and lean
upon us.
Furthermore, we need more repairs
on the Neapolitan Road and n new cll-
vert about four miles south of IIercula-
neum. A cheap two-inch plank eulvcrt
was put in there under the Greek
regime, but it was jerked loose aud
vomited full of Fesuvius before the
path-master could make out his hill.
"WOrkingmen OF Herculaneum and
away up the Gulch, We need better
public buildings. The earthquake of
'63, which shook down the water-wOrks
and court house at Pompeii, also crack
ed the ceilings in tho register OF deeds
Office here, and made the Jail one OF
the most disagroeable places to fire.
quent that | was ever in.
1--WE need n good deal Of manual
work done here before we have another
volcanic eruption. My idea is to con-
struct wing-damS and sluices on the
west side which will turn the lava down
through Agrppina's old field. and so
on down the Coolie, past Trifoliatum
O'DonnelPs place. This will give work
to the unemployed, and il can secure
the contracts also for erecting new
courthouse, as now hope to do. pro-
vided we can elect Aurelius MurSins,
of the Third ward, you'll see better
times here in Herculaneum than we
have known since the war.
''Fellow-citizens, do not know that
| have any more TO say, except that eff
forts will doubtlessly be made on the
eve of election TO flood the country
with artful falsehoods and voters from
other districts. Bear in mind that if
you elect Impecunius Andronicus-a
newspaper man who never did days
work in his life, man who does moth
ing but sit up nights and write pieces
for the paper, n man who says more
mean things through the columns of the
Herculaneum Air Cushion than /
could remember if tried-you will see
retrenchment, you will see money mat
ters so scarce that you workingmen will
have to trim your alpaca summer-togas
with RABBIT skin and wear them all WIN
ter. Wheat will be twenty cents a
bushel and bananas two cents q bunch.
What do you care for reduced taxation
when you can't get anything to eat?
make improvements. Build bridges,
roads, court-houses, jails, poniten-
tiaries, wing-dams, sluices, canals, and
water-works. Then assess the wealthy
and pussy old property holders to pay
the taxes. Work will then be plenty,
and you toilers who are temporarily
out of upright pianos, carriages, thir-
teen-story buildings, and other taxable
property will escape.
had intended to speak briefly in re-
lation to the tariff, but SEQ the hour
is already late. However, will take
moment or two TO say that in my opin-
ion we owe almost everything we en-
JOY to high protective tariff. Hercu-
laneum used TO be pestered almost to
death by yeller-janders and milk-sick-
ness, and when the Greeks colonized
this country you could not go out of doors
without getting infested with Indian
arrows. Then man had to take his
life in one hand and a catapult in the
other. Then the pioneers of Hercu-
laneum frequently came home from a
massacre with arrow holes through ev-
cry vital organ they had, and the rear
breadths of their systems looked like
feather-dusters.
''IIow is it now, under n protective
tariff? There has not been a case of
yeller- jander5 in Herculaneum for six
months, and the noble savage has
moved away.
"In closing, let me say that the la
boring man has the warmest and best
place in my heart. / think great
deal OF my wife and family, but l will
not allow them TO come between me
aud the workingman. / would be a
workingman myself, God knows, If
did not have so much else 10 DO.
The laboring classes are entitled TO
the best there is in life, gentlemen of