davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25


yard decorations.
Plain oak is the most popular style of
furniture at present. and takes the lead IN
the sixteen different kinds OF wood now IN
newmarket. Complete chamber sets in ash,
Georgia pine, California redwood, maple.
walnut birch. cherry. mahogany. oak. eb-
ony. rosewood. sycamore. white mahogany.
satirwood, hutternut and olive can DE
found at the leading furniture houses In the
city.
preference over all the others" said sales
man In a Wabash avenue house. This Is
the case with the masses, rs well as our
more aristocratic customers. Fancy carved
work in chambe suits is no longer In de-
mand, and some even prefer the dull shellac
finish instead OF polished goods. In din ng-
room furnishings the chairs are not so
high backed as formerly, and the round
dining table takes the leai, though the
square ones are still being used. The va
riety OF sdeboards is now so extensive
lat the people are no longer building them
into their houses, as they can buy any style
they want ready-made.
One of the very latest novelties is the
gentleman's Oriental shaving cabinet. 1t Is
called the gentleman cabinet 10 distinguish
it from the ladies shaving cabinet. which
will be out soon.
The cabinet is OF antique oak. sixteenth
century finish. four feet high and two feet
wide. fitted with drawers and lockers Tor
lather. razors, towels, and whetstones.
The top is surmounted by a small mirror
set in n carved frame and hung on swivels.
1t is handy thing to have in the house
and is mounted on rollers so that 1t can be
moved at will. If the gentleman doesn't
want 10 shave in a certain room he can
shove the machine into another part OF the
house. The drawer handles and hinges are
of oxidized brass. the hinges which are on
the locker extending half way across the
door.
Ano.kor oobinat a N oop hinad harher-
shop, wardrobe. dressing case. and
chifronier OF antique oak, paneled. iron
trimmings. and carved doors. 1t is con-
siderably larger than the Oriental cabinet
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25
The design is similar TO the writing desks

The design Is similar TO the writing desks
In use In the sixteenth century and looks
more like stronghold than a desk.
The colonial Is another pretty design In
writing desks. IL Is Of mahogany. filled
finish. with curved legs. carved In fantastic
ngures, and claw feet OF brass holding
white glass balls resting on the floor. Like
folding beds. writing desks are now made
with intent 10 deceive. One OF the deceit
full kind is regular confidence game OF a
desk. To look at 1t one would think IL was
combination book case aud escI1toire.
but IL is neither. The bookcase attach
ment Is fraud. being furnished on the In
side with water-tank instead of shelves.
The lid OF the desk being raised reveals a
china WISH bowl connected with the tank
by pipe and also fitted with waste pipe.
which can be connected with the sewer at
a moments notice. 1t is very ingenious
contrlvance indeed. Should the owner OF
can wash his hands of the whole business
then and there.
Another bunko piece OF furniture Is the
sixteenth century center-table with one leg
growing out OF "A pedestal. 1t Is u square
topped table with round corners bound In
metal with imitation bolt-heads. thus CIV
ing out tho impression that the tai 10 was
put together by a blacksmith. But this is
not the only claim the table has on the peo-
pie. The leg. which Is about a foot square,
is hollow. and Is Intended for "A rece ptacle
for contraband goods for gentlemen only.
1t is said that this table would find great
favor in prohibition community.
The hall chest is another odd conceiJ In
bric-a-brac furniture. 1t resembles car
penter's tool chest or an Englishman's box.
better known as luggage. They are made
of the different cabinet woods. but six
teenth century oak has the preference.
Some are wrought in plain and others In
shaded finish. and are literally bound with
oxidized metal trimmings. the hinges ex-
tending entirely across the lid. They are
intended for use In the front halls OF fam
lily residences and make a convenient place
In which to throw gum shoes and other
hall litter when visitors arrive unexpected
ly. Yale lock and key goes with each
and every hall-chest
In parlor furniture the over stuff Is most
ly straight goods in tapestries with plush
trimmings. fancy thing in parlor chairs
is the Louis XIV. and ~. either in natural
mahogany or antique oak. inlaid with mar
quetry. with white and old gold trimmings.
The Queen Anne bedstead is novelty In
polished mahogany. with the head and foot
boards finished on both sides. Ii is usually
placed In the middle of a room In order
that its fine points may be seen from every
Tont. But in spite of all the rare and
costly gems in sixteenth century oak and
other woods the old reliable nineteenth
century installment oak is by far the most
DODulnr
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25
Wanted TO Satisfy Him.

Prominent Citizen-Slade of Metro
politan Hotel has just killed another
feller-tourist from the East som'eres.
Second Prominent Citizen-What
was the Teller dom to Slade?
"Nuthin' only givin' his orders.
Wanted a fire in his room, weather
strips on the door, soap, towel, hot wa
ter, more quilts, and l fergit what
else. An Slade shot him."
"Oh, s'pose Slade reckoned it was
a pity that a Teller who wanted
heaven so bad shouldn't have it,
MinsevS Veekly.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25

Il b'long to the Baptisses, | do.
Tilda-thet's my wife thar-she b'longs
to the Hardshell Baptisses, the no
CONTEST church in these hyar noun
tings. Nance thar's been a threatnin'
ter jine the Methodisses, but if she do
I'll drub her till she CANT holler"
The wife made no reply to the fling
at her faith, but Nance glared at her
father, and then, bringing her fist down
on the table so fiercely that the dishes
danced, she cried:
"l'll jine-I'll iine-I'll jine-Pll be
damned eff don't jine!" and turning
over her chair she fled the room. bang
ing the door behind her as she went.
Old Melton said nothing, but he
clinched his teeth with an ominous sig
niticance.
Supper over and the table cleared off,
the old man went to the kitchen door
and called for Nance.
What do yo' want?" inquired the
girl.
Il want yo' to come an play us a
chune on the organette."
Il won't"
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25
"Yo' will"
Il tell you, pop, 1 wont.

"Yo' will"
Il tell you, pop, wont.
"Yo' wuthless wenchl I'll larn We
who's boss. I'll beat you till the blood
runs down yer legs. so hep mel"
Running TO a distant corner of the
main room he caught up gnarled
hickory cane and fastened back to the
kitchen.
where's Nance?" he demanded of
his wife.
"She done put out while yo' WINS
lookin' fer yer stick, was the answer
"The slut I'll find her an wallop
her like / would a dog"
Stay, sir" cried MILFORD, as Melton
opened the door. "Stay, sir Surely
you wouldn't strike a woman?"
Il wouldn't, Ell? I'll whip her like
a dog, ] tell yo' Stand back" and
tearing himself loose from the grasp
of his guest, he rushed out into the
darkness ard was swallowed up in the
night.
Suddenly wild scream rang high
over the roaring of the wind in the
pines-a scream so pitiful that MILFORD
rushed off in the direction from
whence it came.
"Helpl selpl hclp!"
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25
lie Found a Job.

"Has your husband found work vet,
Mrs. Mccarthy"
"He hez tibet, mum. He's picter
hanger"
a picture hanger? Why, supposed
that required artistic skill and good
deal of taste"
Paste, indade it does, mum. It
takes a dale av paste, sure. The poor
bye carries bucket av it wild him all
day, and then sometimes he can't make
the blissed picters stick to them ould
boards at all, at all !"
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25
How the Joke Was Evened.

We had a new master In W Aca-
DENY, New Hampshire, says II. Red
wood, in the New York Mercury, when
| was a pupil there not many years
ago, with whom we promised ourselves
some sport, before we got through with
him the first morning he faced us in
the classroom. He was a moderate
sized, rather delicate man, with n
mild, defensive air that seemed to
appeal to our generosity to make his
life less of burden to him than we
had made that of his predecessor.
He appeared to fear we would carry
him out of the building or spring some
sort of mine under his feet for the
first few days, and he eyed Wilkins
Sharp, our ringleader in all mischief
with sort of care, as though he felt
completely at his mercy,
Things moved on with half-hearted
uncertainty for about week. The
master held such a lax grasp of the
reins of authority that we expected to
make him step down and out within a
few days at the furthest. His reading
of lengthy chapter from Chronicles
or Deuteronomy every morning before
prayers was a grievance which the more
active spirits determined to redress.
We knew there was fun on hand, of
what nature the majority of us were
ignorant, when we went into the class
room one morning in the second week.
A loud bray greeted us, which we an
swered with shouts of laughter. A don
key stood in the masters place at the
Il Il l, 10
huge pair of rusty-rimmed glasses
straddling his nose and ludicrously
solemn expression of countenance, as
if he wished to bear the honors thrust
upon him with becoming dignity.
We were all in our seats trying to
smother the mirth, when the master
came in. He walked up to the desk as
usual, and seemed to look right
through that animal without seeing
him. Behold thy brotherl" staring
at him from the board made no impress
sion on his optic nerve. He stood upon
the right of the desk, looking down
upon us without a word AS We
watched he seemed to rise inches be-
yond his usual height. His eyes fairly
blazed behind his glasses. His mild
defensive air changed to such mastery
aggressiveness that we fairly quaked
before him.
Presently he brought his glance
round upon Wilkins Sharp and concen-
trated it on his face. Those orbs of
flame seemed to scorch him. His face
Redeemed as if he had been pulling
chestnuts out of the fire.
Wilkins Sharp, come here!" said the
master.
Wilkins obeyed with look of bra
vado.
ride that donkey out of the room !"
Wilkins did not move to obey with
alacrity.
DO you want lift?" inquired the
master, and in flash, by some dexter
Gus movement of arm and boot that
fairly dazzled us, Wilkins was boosted"
upon the creatures back and was on
his way to the door amid a roar of
laughter.
We looked at the master. He had
relapsed into his usual calm
"Now that we are rid of the donkey
and his brother" he said, as he turned
over the leaves of the Bible leisurely,
I'VE will read the third chapter of
Leyiticus."
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25
Was Vic Him.

An old negro who was sleeping alone
in cabin was awakened by a noise in
the room, and striking a light, saw
man attempting to open drawer.
"Whut you dom dar?"
The robber, himself a negro, an
swered; "Tryin' ter see what you got
in dis house"
Oar amt nothin' yere dat longs ter
you"
will long ter me when 1 gifts my
hans on it,"
Look we're, generman, tell you whut
I'll do. Ill shoot craps wild you right
here"
use wild YOU" the robber answered.
Fetch out yo' bones. "-ArkdnSaW
Traueler.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25

and IL it combined folding bed along with
its other conveniences would be about
a complete chamber set for a bachelors
quarters. The Grecian Is still another now
city in this line. but smaller than the other
two. standing on aised legs handsomely
carved and mounted with polished metal.
For the encouragement of Chicago liter
ia writing tables. They range from the
massive offce-desk to the dainty escritoire
suggestive of love laden epstles traced on
per, umed paper. All the known timber
susceptible to the designer and cabinet
makers art enter into the composition or
these tables. The handsomest a-e OF an .
tipue oak. until lately used only in odd
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25
STUFF AND NONSENSE.


SET in her ways-a brooding hen.
A swALLow-TAIL-the story of Jonah
and the whale.
FIRST mattress-How do you feel?
Second mattress-Full as a tick.
THE monkey goes to the sunny sid6
Of the tree when he wants warmer
climb.
PRAYERS may go begging for an
answer, but "What'll you have?' never
does.
PUTIN patched dime in the collec-
ton box is like buXin' scalper's ticket
TO heaven.
Soup a la Jay Gould-take little
stock, six times as much water, and
then put in the lamb.
TEACHER -" Anonymous means
without name Give an example,
Miss Griggs." Miss Griggs-"My baby
sister Is anonymous.
LoAFER - How are you? Just
thought I'd drop in while to kill
time. Busy Maxwell, we don't want
any of our time killed.
BRowN-How time flies. Jenkins
am not aware of its speedy passage.
B.-Then you have not note to pay.
J.-NO; 1 hold yours.
BLooDGooD-Silbya always reminds
me of breeze that comes before a
summers rainstorm. Travis-Why?
Because, answered Bloodgood, "he
Ii so fresh.
@THIs is little late for you to be out,
isn't it, Peck? Aren't you afraid your
wife will miss you?" Mr.. n. Peck Il
hope she will She can fling things
pretty straight, though.
Mrs. HINTON (recently married)-
! Did you know my husband was very i'll?
Miss Carrington-I suppose he must be,
my dear. Before he married you he
told me / had broken his heart.
VIsIToR-(to bereaved widow Your
husband | understand, was killed in
factory? Widow-Alas. yes; poor dear
William was reckoned a smart man,
but he didn't know much about fly
| wheels. (
STATION come, myS
| good man, you mustn't walk on the
track. Tramp isgustedly)-The con-
| dnctor says l can't ride, and you say
can't walk What's your blamed old
road here for, anyway?
WILLIE wonder why can't make
my kite fly? Elder sister-Pe rhaps
the caudal appendage is dispropor-
| iionate to the superficial area. Willie
I don't think that's it. / believe there
isn't weig hit enough on the tail.
Mrs. STATEsMAN-Do you know, sir,
| that YOU came home last night in an ut
| terly disgraceful condition? Mr.. States
man swallowing about quart of wa
| ter)-"W Woman, do you know that the
| time of year has arrived when the
country"has to be saved again?
Mrs. SKrNNPHLINT Josiah, don't
| you think Johnny's hair needs cutting?
Mr. Skinntiint docking up from his
| paper How long is it till Christmas?
| A little over five weeks. (Resuming
his paper)-All right, I'll give him
haircut for Christmas present.
A COMPLICATED FUNERAL.
O bury my arms in dear Mexico.
| And bury my heart in the South
o bury my legs in the State of New York,
In Georgia please bury my mouth.
For L heve been married at least four
To spouses who've laid down their lives,
And now thai I'm dead l wish 10 be
At the side of my various wives.
BRowN-And so you have got first
rate cook? What paper did you adve'-
tise in? Fogg-Didn't advertise in any.
My wife told Mrs. Gray we wanted
| girl, but made her promise not to tell
anybody. ~Well?" well, we had
the door-bell ringing for a fortnight
from morning till night. No less than
hundred applications for the place
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25


lage. Caney Fork, tributary of the
Cumberland River, rises in the noun
tains, and surges over the rocky lodges
full hundred feet into the sequestered
valley below. And it is this cataract
that is known as Falling Water.
The surrounding country is wild,
lonely, and romantic, and was a favor
lite resort of the moonshiners, until the
United States revenue officers swept
down upon them, shooting a Few Of
them dead and sending many of them
TO the penitentiary.
Not far from Falling Water is a
deep, PERCEPTIONS ravine, the sides of
which are covered with pines and an
impenetrable underground of vines
and shrubbery. The density of the
foliage hides the bottom of the
ravine from view, but if you follow
a dim bridle-path trending from
the road, you will find that it
leads to the door of an old cabin sur
rounded by a stake-and- rider fence,
half hidden by blackberry bushes,
sassafras, and weeds.
This cabin was the home of old Mel.
ton, moonshiner, and his family, I'M
I'LL the spring OF 1919.
The still was located within a stones
throw of the house, between two gigan-
tic powders, and so cleverly was ii
hidden by the rocky walls that lowered
up on three sides of it, and so cur
tanned in was it on the remaining side
by the vines that fell in green festoons
from the gray lodges of free-stone
above. that the old moonshiner felt
himself perfectly safe from the prying
eyes of both officers and informers.
One evening about dark, as old Melton
sat in the gallery of his cabin drawing
consolation alternately from stone
Jug and a corn-cob pipe, he was saluted
by young man on horseback, who had
ridden up from the right and whose
face betrayed an expression of keen
annoyance.
"Hellow cried the horseman, draw
ing rein, "can you tell me how far it is
to Cookeville?"
Bout TO miles, stranger" replied
Melton. rising to his feet and slouching
forward "Hev yo' lost yer bearin's %
"Yes; went down to old Davenant's
to collect bill this morning and"
Long Jack Davenant's, stranger?"
Yes; up at the head of Caney Fork,
and"
"Why didn't yo' turn to the left when
yo' came to Squar Mills place."
81 did but / took the wrong road
out in that COMPOUNDED flat woods"
"Jesso, Jesse! Been thar myself
IT'S puzzle to stranger. An what
shell call yer name?"
"Wi1ford Harry Milford
"Any relation Z the Wilfords down t.
Smiths Fork? ?"
"No; my home is in Nashville Am
professional man there. Had to look
after farm of mine down in DeKalb
County, and so concluded TO ride up
here and collect bill from old Day
enant before i went back to Lebanon.
The old man wasn't at home, though.
BY the way, could l find place here
or hereabout TO stay all night? 1t will
rain long before 1 can reach Cooke
VILE"
Il dunno. P'r'aps Henry O. could
keep yo'."
who is Henry O., and where does
he reside 2"
Henry @. Clark, yo' know. Lives
bout quarter out on the Cookeville
road yander," pointing to the left.
Henry Q's rich-Henry Q. is. His
house must a cost cool five hundred.
Jest foller thet-"
A binding flash, Handicapped and
a driving torrent of rain interrupted
the speaker.
"Wall. ] say, Mr.. MILFORD, if tibet
ares ther way Their weathefs er-gwine
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25
ROugh on the Roof.

Builder want you to do some
thing for me.
Friend-What is it?
You see this house is almost finished,
excepting shingling the roof.
so / perceive.
We'll, l want you to look around
and see if you can't find a thin car
penter who does not weigh more than
100 pounds. / must have light car
penter to put on those shingles. II a
heavy man goes up on that roof the
whole house vii tumble in"
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25

are as enterprising as our own. Inc arti-
cles one sees in hrst-class houses are made
up in both natural and antique designs. dull
and polished. and in a style which shows
that furniture as we'll as history repeats
itself. Most OF the new goods are odds and
ends for library. parlor. and hall furniture.
Marble tops for dressers, mantels and con-
ter tables are going out OF date. but this
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25
Handsome Is as Handsome Does.

Robson-Where are you bound?
Remsen-Up to ask my pretty cou-
sin to marry me.
Robson-Well, good luck to you.
Remsen--Thanks, dear boy.
Robson Gan hour later)-Well, did
your pretty cousin say yes?
Remsen-No; the homely thing re-
fused me.-Jltdge.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25

FIFTEENTH century
oak with oxidized met
al trimmings Is the very
latest novelty in parlor
and living room furni-
ture. and nowhere In
the country are these
back number conceits
reproduced in such
perfection as by the
CHICAGO manufactures.
Bales ,ndows are
filed with the artistic
creations. and adver-
Using pages fairlybulge
with fancy etchings
Furnished by furniture
daalera of whom none
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25

SELF-FoRGETFULNEss in love for
others has foremost place in our ideal
of character, and our deep homage, as
representing the true end of humanity.
Who does upbraid himself for his slow.
ness in those sympathies which are as
a multiplying mirror TO the joys of life,
rejecting them in endless play?
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25

start with his prisoner for Cookeville.
They had proceeded less than
twenty yards from the door, when the
sharp report of rifle was heard, and
MILFORD reeled from his saddle-dead
At the same moment the white, tense
desperate face of Nance vanished from
the open window.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25

BIZ EVA KArHARIsK clap.

There is many pleasant land that lies
Under the sky unfurled.
Countries fair, whose beauty rare
Is the theme OF half o world.
But In each wanderers heart OF hearts,
Could his true choice be known,
Ever you'll find inscribed the name
or the land no calls his own.
And TO me, there is u haunting melody,
That no discord doth destroy,
In the soft, sonorous title of
own
Illinois.
claim for her no legends
Like the German for his Rhine.
She does not boast the classic palm,
Nor yet the gothic pine
But, like some gray brown-haired maid,
Not blonde, nor dark brunette,
The temperate charm that is her own
Her lovers neer forget
From tropic sun. or arctic seas.
No fierce extremes alloy
The hope-inspiring air that sweeps
My
Illinois.
How blithely DER her fertile fields
The prairie breezes blow
Across the level corn lands,
Where n nation 5 harvests grow.
The royal Mississippi laves
Her golden sunset side;
Cleans on hor brow Lake Michigan,
A coronal Of PRIDE
her stately Garden City towers
With worthy pride up-buoy
Above oil would-be rival States
My
Own
Illinois.
Dear State the CLINT Of thy wild flower,
The song OF thy wild bird,
Were of color and of music.
All my childhood saw or heard
Thrilling, like scents OF paradise,
Across these dusty years,
They still make tenderest memories
That tremble into tears.
Untouched by bitterness, and, like
A child's kiss, sweet and coy,
Drifts back the dream of innocence In
Ny
own
Illinois.
When on me dawns that fateful hour
The Archer Deaths own time
Perchance his shaft may still this heart
In some far 70 reign cline.
But pray that my dreamess dust may sleep
Where his song OF reckless Joy
The blackbird pipes to the prairie sod
In my
Own
Illinois.
CHICAGO, Ill.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25

THE parent who sends his son into
the world uneducated and without
skill in any art or science does a great
injury to mankind as we'll as to his own
family, for he defrauds the community Of
a useful citizen and bequeaths to it a
nuisance.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25
CRAZY FOR ANTIQUES.
CHICAGO FURNITURE MANUFACTUR-
ERs FORCED TO ODD CONCEPTS.

Everybody Apes the Fashions Popular
with ~ Race who Have Long Been Food
for Worms - Some of the Articles, After
All, but Hollow SHARES, Oxidized Shams,
and Iron Bound Mockeries.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25

A WOMAN who favors equal suffrage
wants to know if it is crime to be a
woman. No, but it is rot manly. We
will say no more.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25

"Ah, Mrs. Blackstreet, it's very lucky
did not meet you at the time that pic
ture was taken"
"Ah, Doctor, I'm afraid you are
Aatterer. Do you mean lucky for me?"
"Ahem, no, not exactly. Lucky for
me-"
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1889-12-25
AT THE OPEN WINDOW
BY WILL HUBBARD HERMAN.
WATER is

ALLING WATER is
the name of the most
picturesque spot in
Northumberland coun-
try of Tennessee. 1t
is situated a few miles
south of Cookeville,
and is one of the first
places visited by tour
lists who venture up
IN that HIGHLAND vii