Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-12-30
FIRST SOCIAL SESSION.
The EIks Celebrated One Of Their Joyous
Occasions Last NIght-wit and Music
sandvviched.

The Elks Celebrated One OF Their Joyous
Occasions Last NIght-wir and Music
sandwiched.
The Elks held right social session in
their happy hunting grounds an Fourth ave-
nue. last night. To be precise, Pittsburg
Lodge No. IL, B. P. o. Elks, filed Odd
Fellows Hall with mirth and merriment
from 9 o'clock even unto the mystic Ginning
Of the midnight hour
In the chair of state, beaming upon the
assembled guests, sat Mr.. james Collins, of
New York Lodge No. 1, Chairman of the
Session. Hither and thither. attentive to the
needs Of everyone, fitted the members Of the
committee, Messrs. John Wamser, Joseph
Stophlet, William Lee, John Kessler and Peter
Schwartz. On the right hand of the Chair.
were grouped in picturesque disorder, the
Grand Opera House Minstrels. The gaslight
gltnted upon their FURNISHED instruments. as
they gracefully uplifted them, and with a skirl
While the notes, high or low, hoated harmo-
niously from their brazen prisons an opportu-
nifty occurred for passing glance around the
crowded hall. High upon his throne the Chair
were arranged rows Of guests listening atten-
lively to the music. About the upper portion
Of the hall ElkF by the dozen lounged for
moment, and then slipped mysteriously into
ly, and made clear every face in the assemblage,
while the sound of hurrying footsteps were
deadened By the thick carpets below.
No sooner had the last sounds of the overture
died away than MT. Walter MeIlis, terrifcally
got up as a constable, in a helmet three sizes
too large for him, bounded like Harlequin
upon the scene Then commenced an indis-
crimlnate hauliSg-up-to-justice Of the most in:
offensive persons, for the most unheard-of
crimes. Blush bench and bar when ye learn
how Mr.. City Solicitor Elphinstone was ruth.
lessly pulled in" because he had sinned
against the Ohairman's draconlc code, by not
removing his overcoat The unfortunate legal
luminary was not even allowed to plead in his
own defense. and when it was divulged that he
was lawyer, his fine was raised from Is cents
to 25
Doctor Frank Mcdonald was mulcted in the
sum of 10 cents for coming in tall hat, and
Mr.. Hellenberg suffered like fine ''for ap-
pearing in beastly state of sobriety." But
the climax was reached when Policeman Mellis
was himself arrested, and brought before the
tribunal, notwithstanding his furious menace
of 'having somebody's blood with his club."
what were you doing, sirf" sternly asked
Mr.. Radamanthus Collins.
Attending TO my duties, SIR" meekly re-
ponded the now thoroughly cowed pseudo
copper. sThen you are fined quarter for at
tending to your duties. Next caseP' and SO the
fun went on ',as merry as marriage bell"
Presently came perfectly appropriate inter-
lude in the shape Of an invasion of sandwiches
Music began again when the audience had
taken 1.-THE cookies on their epigastric
muscles;' and Mr.. Leon j. Long. with banjo ac-
compartment sang funny song, about GER
tain worthy who by doing no work, and watching
his opportunity, sis on the police force
now" One of this worthy's feats was
''arresting COW for licking her calf"
and he seemed to be addicted to dropping nickels
in certain slots at the City Hall when he
wanted to step into Office. Then James L.
Calvin, introduced as lately from Paris (only
one man interpolated Kentucky" and was
promptly fined), played the barrel organ with
Skill and dexterity, following that entertain
ment with woeful ditty, all about bullfrog.
Then the national anthem, Down Went Nc
Glnty" was exceIlently rendered by member
of the Lewis Quartet.
Eleven O'Clock had now arrived, SO the toast
of 'sThe Absent Brothers" was drank with ac-
claim, after which Mr.. Gus Miller, Of Grand
Opera House Band, gave delightful cornet
tribute to the harmony, sang where the
Shamrock Grows" with taste and feeling and
was fined % cents for not singing out OF time.
Nothing daunted, however. he recited that
sweet old poem, "Caoch O'Leary and His
Dog" in a manner that fairly touched the
hearts OF his hearers.
Mr.. Charles Mitchell, of baseball note, then
sang another Irish song. and sang it in an in
imitabie style. One Of the truths conveyed by
Mr. Mitchell was that ''the Irish are like to a
wild-growing flower: the more you pluck them,
the thicker they'll grow"
But sooner CT later the dearest must part"
and at last it became time for the Elks to leave
the hall of merriment. A mighty ring was
formed, and, joining hands, the whole frater-
nifty in voices loud, and low. and deep, and
shrilI sang that parting chorus of every con-
vivial assembly, from Indus to the Pole"
Burns glorious "Auld Lang Syne."