davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-02-13

Mother What did young Mr.. Tim.
kins say to you, Ella, last night, while
he was trying to button your glove.
Ella (sadly)-He said that a man
who would make a glove that would
not button easier than that ought to
be hanged.
Mother-Well, | wouldn't waste
any more time there.-Puck.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-02-13
WIT AND HUMOR.

In a tight place-at a wine supper
.Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-02-13

You'll make a fine entree, old
man" remarked the king of the Can
nibal Islands, slapping the missionary
on the back.
Eyes, they tell me I'm stuffed to
martyr" he replied sadly.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-02-13

"There is one great thing about the
telephone" said Mr.. Shorty.
"And that ?"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-02-13

Col. Bolivar Ia native Kentuckian)
-Wastin' yure time, sab, wastip' it {!
Thar are no privates here TO detect,
sab nuthin' less than captains. sab,
an mighty few of them Time.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-02-13

"a four foot man is not afraid to
tell six footer just what he thinks
of him, with several miles of wire be-
tween the two."-Argosy.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-02-13

Stranger-Colonel, ! am a private
detectiye and am about to open an
Office In your city, and should like
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-02-13

"See here, Bruff," said the editor to
the proofreader, "you have got me in
nice box, you have"
"How's that, sir ?"
why, ] wrote that there was a
grand parade of uniformed voters at
Hodgeville, and you've printed it 'un-
informed voters. '"-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-02-13

Kind lady-Oh, what a naughty
little boy you havel Doesn't he
know that it is wrong to strike his
mamma with that big stick ?
Proud mother-Och, don't blame
me choild, Mrs. Carter He's only
doing everything he sees his father
do, bliss him.-Judge.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-02-13

A bow.legged man was standing be.
fore the Office stove warming himself
He gruffly refused to buy paper
from boy who thrust his head in al
the door Indignant newsboy-"Say
mister, you're standing too near the
fire. guess, you're a-warping."-Ex
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1889-02-13

fire, | guess, you're a-warping."-Ex
"Say, ma," remarked the small boy
isn't it funny that everybody calls
my little brother bouncing baby p
"Why do you think it is funny
William 7" replied the mother.
because, when / dropped him on
the floor this morning, he didn't
bounce bit. FIX.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27
Advertise the Town.

Nine years apo Chattanooga, Tenn q,
raised large sum of money for the pur
pose of advertising its advantages. The
money was well spent. although it did
not bring in an immediate return. Ii
made the town talked about. induced CAPT.
talists and investors to go there and exam
ine its advantages; and as it was built on
solid foundations, these visits resulted in
large investments and immigration The
result is seen today in q city of nearly
&c, 900 people. where nine years ago there
were but 1900, and possessing hun
dreds of new and profitable Industries
Chattanooga has proved that great advan
tages come from judicious advertising
and every promising city may reap SINH.
lar rewards from making known it's re-
sources. We have noticed disposition
on the part of some of them to expect too
immediate returns from an investment of
this kind. They expect to see capital and
immigrants pouring in the very moment
the appeal for them is made. Chatta>
nooga has learned better; has discovered
that 1t takes some years for this advertise
ing to have an effect, but that if the adj.
vantsges of a town are really all it claims
it need have no fear that capital will no,
intimately find it out and build it up.
Chattanooga was one of the first of
southern cities to advertise. 1t is con-
sequently one of the first to secure tht
benefits of advertisements.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27
Night AIT.

The following from the New York
World will be Of local interest everywhere
just at present: An extraordinary fallacy
is dread of night air What air can We
breathe at night but night arr The
choice is between pure night air without
and foul air within. Most people prefer
the latter; an upaccountable choice
What will they say if it is proved to be
true that fully one-half of all diseases we
suffer from are occasioned BY people
sleeping with their windows shut? An
open window most nights in the year can
never hurt any one. In great cities
night air is often the best and purest
TO be had in twenty-four hours One
could better understand shutting the
windows in town during the day than
during the night for the sake of the sick
The absence of smoke, the quiet. all tend
to make the night the best time for airing
the patient. One of our highest medical
authorities on consumption and climate
has told me that the air of London is
never so good as after 10 O'Clock at night.
Always air your room then, from the out
side air. if possible. Windows are made
to open, doors are made to shut-a truth
which seems extremely difficult of com.
prehension. Every room must be aired
from without, every passage from within
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27
4 surcPs-fuI House

The plumbing establishment of M.
Yerbury. No. 2l9 Eighteenth street, is
better prepared than ever to execute or
ders in gas and steam fitting and in lay
ing water, gas and sewer pipe. This
establishment have always on hand a
complete stock of pipe, brass goods,
packing hose. celebrated steam pumps.
inspirstors and electors, wrought lead
and cast pipe, pipe fitting, and brass
goods Of every description, rubber hose
and packing of all kinds; also drain tile
and sewer pipe-in fact everything pc
cuhar to their line of business can
be found there. Many of Rock Is
lands business blocks and fine resi-.
dences have been fitted with steam: wa
ter and heating apparatus by this firm,
and all work done by them is frst-class,
as they employ none but experienced
workmen. Mr.. Charles Yerbury is the
manager of this establishment, and is a
thorough mechanic, as well as thor.
ough gentleman and business man. Read
advertisement on another page
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27
CLUSTERS LAST RALLY.
flaws Realistic Representation or
the Little Big Horn Conflict.

The feature dc resistance Of the wild
West" and Forepaugh combination,
which. by the way, appears in this city
Thursday. August 1, is an intensely vivid
reproduction of that last great conflict be-
tween the forces of civilization and bar.
barism-the sanguinsry engagement be-
tween United States troops led by the
immortal Custer. and the implacable
Sioux marshalled by the formidable Sit
ting Bull, on the Little Big Horn,
Montana. June 25. 1875. This mimic
battle has created profound SEN
sation wherever Mr.. Forepaugh has ex-
hlbited. No such thrilling realism and
impressive effects were ever before wit
messed in dramatic production. The
representation brings into requisition
fully two hundred scouts. cowboys. In
dams and csvalrymen. The noted Sioux
chief, "Rain-in-the Face" himself the
reputed slayer of Custer, commands the
Indian contingent, while DR.. Carver. who
bears striking resemblance to the pic
lures of General Custer, impersonates
that lamented hero. The charge of one
hundred mounted and accoutred cavalry
men down the great hippodrome track is
said to be a magnificent spectacle. The
Custer battle will attract no little atten-
ton here.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27
LookingUp Their Records.

The railway postal clerks are AZ present
getting the old family bibles down of the
shelves and looking over their birth rec-
ords very earnestly, in consequence of a
circular which they have just received
from the postofiice department, asking
for a full and complete description of
their pedigree, when they were born the
year, month and day, all about their par
ents, and children, if they have any, and
II not to be afraid of mentioning the
fact; the color Of the eyes and hair, wheth.
er they were in the army or not, when
wounded, if wounded at all, what battle
they were in and how long they were in
the service. whether they own the resi-
dence they live in or rent it. The circu-
cular, however, neglects to inquire the
size and color of the house and whether
the lawn is kept In good condition.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27
EIrst a PIeml-Annn a GIANT.

We are too apt to regard a small all,
ment much as we would some pigmy, I'M
pleasant of aspect and prankish indeed,
but incapable of serious mischief. We
ignore the fact that il grows prodigiously
strengthens in proportion, and begets evil
progeny. A fit of indigestion, slight
bilious attack, sensations of unrest and
languor when the system should have
been braced by recent sleep, unaccounta>
BILE nervousness, inactivity of the kidneys
or bladder-whst are these but the pre-
cursors of obstinate and serious bodily
disturbance. In either of the above
emergencies, common sense and exper>
fence unite in indicating Hostetter's
Stomach Bitters as the best preventive
Particularly should its use be prompt
when the languor, yswning, chilliness
down the back. and feverishness that
precede a malarial attack, manifest them.
selves. Incipient rheumatism grows apace
Don't neglect it. SO with constipation
and debility.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27
HOW TO "HELLO."

some Polite Hints for the Guidance
of Patrons Of the Telephone FIX
change.
The following rules for the guidance Of
patrons Of the telephone exchange should
be posted on the wall beside the telephone
and carefully scanned at least once day,
il not more frequently referred to:
II you have telephone in your store,
ring up central and then go and wait on a
customer. Pay no attention to the bell
when central rings back but go back to
the telephone in about fifteen minutes,
ring up central and make big "kick"
because central did not wait for you.
Always speak Grossly and swear at the
central. She likes that.
humble in an undertone and II central
does not hear you tell her TO take the
cotton out OF her ears"
Take your time answering your bell, or
what is better. do not answer il at all;
but in half an hour ring up and ask who
called you mp. and make big "kick" il
central has forgotten who il was.
Always ask central to transfer the mes
sage for you She likes to do this. as she
generally has nothing to do. and this helps
to kill time for her.
Allow everybody who wants To, TO use
the telephone. Hang the receiver big end
up, rs in this way it gets full of dust,
making another excuse for complaint.
Spit tobacco Juice in the trsnsmltter
occasionally. Ms this improves the sound
Refuse to pay toll messages, and if yon
are on line with any one else, listen tn
everything said,
II you call up somebody and the tele-
phone girl replies in sweet tones, they're
busy now" cuss her for it. It's all her
fault.
II the girl tells you that certain
number wanted has had its "'phone'
taken out. tell her you know better, thai
you talked to that number the other day
and If she don't give you communication
you will report her to the manager.
Ii she tells you that certain tele'
phone Is out Of repair. tell her that:
none of her business to give you it any
way.
Scold her, stammer at her. and Gus,
her IN any way you like. and under al
preteXts. There is a wire between you
and she Is at the other end of it, anC
cant see you. II she tries to talk back
slam up your phone. and then si
down and pride yourself on the reputa
disposition, especially with the ladies.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27
AN EXTRAORDINARY oFFER-To all wan

A N EXTRAORDINARY oFFER-To ali want
61ing employment. We want live, energetic
agents IN every county in the United States and
Canada to sell patent article of great merit, ON
ITS MERITS. An article having no competition
and on which the agent IL protected in the exciu-
sive salc by deed given for each and every conn
~ he may secure from us. with all these advan-
tages 10 orr agents, and the fact that il il article
that can be sold TO every house owner II might not
be necessary to make IAN EXTRAORDINARY
OFFkR' 10 secure good agents ut once, but w.
have concluded to make il to show, not only our
confidence in the merits of our invention but in its
STABILITY by any agent that viii handle il with
energy. "a agents now at work are making
from 1850 10 500 a month clear, and this fact
makes il safe for Us 10 make orr offer to all who
are onto employment. Any agent that will give
our business thirty days trial and f,il to clear
Al least 500 IN this time, ABOVE ALL EXPENSES
can return all goods unsold to US and we will re-
fund the money paid for them. No such EN-
ployer of agents ever dared to make such offers
nor would we if we did not know that we have
agents now making more than oouble this amount.
our large descriptive Giro ulars explain offer
fully, and these we wish to send to everyone ont
of empl yment who will send us three one cent
postage stamps for postage. Send at once and Sc
cure the agency in time for the boom. and go 20
work on the terms named in our extraordinary of :
fer. Address at once, NATIONAL NOVELTY Co
SID Smithheld ST, Pittsburgh, Pa.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27
CHANCERY NOTICE.

STATE OF ILLINOIS,
Rock Island County,
To the september term, A. D 1889 of the Circuit
cOurt-In Char Gerry.
Edgar DeForest Folsom and Bridget Rrnderick
complainAnts, vs. Lazarus Lowry. Emily \
Lowry, .and Marshall Field. Lorenzo e. Wood
house, Joseph n Field, Harlow II. Hisenbot-
tom, John q. McWilhams, partners a. Marshall
Field q Co. Albert A. Sprague, Ohio : :
Sprague and Ezra j. Warner, partners a.
Sprague, Warner Il Co, Clement Baine 4 Co.
Wlnona Mill Company, John II. Lowry. de
PENDANTS Bill TO Foreclose.
mortgage.
+ the above named defendant the Winona Mill
Company:
Affidavit Of your non residence having been filed
in the Office of the clerk OF said Circut Court.
notice Is hereby given TO you, the Winona Mill
Company. that the above named complainants
have filed in said court their bill of complaint
against you on the chAncery eide Of said court;
that a summons in Chancery has been issued in
said cause against You .returnable to the next
term of said circuit court TO be begun and holden
al the court house in the city OF Rock Island in
said county, the first Monday of September,
A. ID. 1859, at which time and place you will ap-
pear and plead answer. or demur TO SAID bill of
complaint, If you see fit.
Rock Island. Ill. July %, A. d. 1889
GEORGE W. GAMBLE.
Clerk of said Court.
SWEENEY WALKER, Sol'rs for complt's. diw
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27
NOTICE To CONTRACTORS.

Sealed proposals viii be received at the office of
the City Clerk, at Rock Island, ILL.,, until O'Clock
P. N. August 9th, 1889, for digging trench, fur
lows:
Commencing at the main on Fifth avenue and
Forty-6fth street, thence south to Seventh avenue
west on Seventh avenue to Forty -fourth street,
thence south on Forty-fonrth street TO Eighth
avenue, thence west on Eighth avenue to Forty
third street, thence south on Forythird street TO
Ninth avenue; also, one six-incb watergate at
Fifth avenue and Forty fifth street, five (5J cross
es, two rs, three two way hydrants, pipes and rs
to connect the same
Separate bids will also be received for digging
the trench on route above specified and back I'LL
the same, the city to furnish all the necessary
water pipe, gates, valves. etc.
Plans and specifications can be seen on file at
the Clerk 3 Office,
Rock Island, H., July 10. 1899.
BY ORDER OF THE COMMITTEE
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27
SPECIAL TAXATION NOTICE.

Notice h hereby given 20 all persons Interested.
that the city council Of the city of Rock Island
having ordered by ordinance pa sed NJ ay IN. 1889
that Second avenue from the west line of the in
terseCtioD Of Fourteenth street, 10 the east line
of the intersection Of Tv ontieth street all being
in the corporate limits Of the city Of Rock Isl =
and, he curbed with CIrbstone. eXcavated and
gIaded, improved and paved with paving brick,
and that a special tax he evied therefor
Said ordinance for said Improvement is on file
in the Office Of the city clerk OF the said city. and
said city has applied to Il e county court of Rock
Island county, Illinois, for an asscs- ment and
levy of the costs of saiC improvement upon and
from the lots and parts Of lots and Of Ia nd
contiguous to the line # said improvement in
said ordinance ordered to he constructed in
proportion to the frOntH ye of such lots. parts OF
lut-, and tracts of land upon the improy ~
ordered TO be constructed as fOresaid and An
assessment thereof having be en- made and return
ed TO said Court. the final hearing thereon will he
had at the November term Of said court com
mencing on the eleventh DAY Of November \ d
1889
All persons desiring may then and there appear
and make their defense.
Dated al hock Island, Illinois, this twenty third
day OF July, A. d. lSs9
Y. NJ. BLANDTNG,
WIN. A. SCHMITT.
II. c. CONNOLLY.
jy245 Commissioners.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27
MALE OF REAL ESTATE.

BY virtue Of an order and decree of the County
conrt Of Rock Island county, Illinois, made on the
petition of the undersigned Abraham Merchant
administrator of the estate of Margaret j. Sears,
deceased, for leave to sell the real Of said
deceased, entered al the July term, A. D. 1889 of
said court, to-wit: on the 10th day of july 1889
shall on the 18th day of August next, at the hour
of o clock i'll the afternoon Of said day. sell At
public sale, Mt the Margaret j Sears homestead
west of Black Hawks watch tower, in said county,
the real estate described as follows. o-wit:
Beginning AT the center corner of section IA,
township Il north, in range west OF the 4th T.
Nj; thence east the halt-seCton line IL Fl
chains; thence south at right angles s chains To
Rof river; thence west with said river TO point
where the half section line running north and
south through said section intersects said
river thence north on said half sec
ton line TO the north side Of Tower street
ia the town of Sears. thence soGth 6q1. west
along the north side of said Tower street "a
chains; thence north parallel with the half sec
ton line war - 40O 6 I'll chains; thence east
> ~ chains tn point on the half section line 60
feet south OF said center corner; thence north to
tcet 10 the place OF beginning: excepting ami
serving therefrom the lands heretofore cOnveyt d
TO the Rock Island Cotton Manufacturing Com
pany aud also the lands heretofore conveyed to
Richard Mansill x Co, by deeds recorded respec-
lively in book 56 Of deeds at page 3l and book 50 of
deeds AT page 26S of the records of sand Rock Isl
and county. said tract containing 6o acre- more
or less; also lots l. and in block 10 in the town
OF Sears; also acre described follows, tow ::
Beginning 3USs4 feet west of the u section corner
on The east slde of the northwest quarter of sec
ton II, township Il north, range west OF the Attn
Z. NJ. running thence south lib feet thence I
S5A feet TO the southeast corner of the old grave
yard; thence north lib feet; thence west l9S feet
thence south 1l3 feet to the southwest corner of
the old grave yard thence wet 81 feet: thence
north 245 feet TO the south line of Rodman's land
theme east a6si4 feet; thence south l3a feet to
the place OF beginning, in Rock Island county
Illinois, on the following terms, to.wIt:
one-half in cash 10 be paid on the confirmation
ny he court Of the report OF sale; the balance on
a credit Of II months. the purchaser to give his
rity and mortgage on the premises sold TO secure
payment thereof
Dated this 10th day Of July. A. d. 1889.
A. MERCHANT,
Administrator Of the estate of Margaret j. Sears
deceased.
ADAIR PLEAsASTs, Attorney. July l7-d4w
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27
100 LadIas Wantad.

And 100 men to call on any druggist fol
a free trial package of Lanes Family
Medicine. the great root and herb RENE,
dy. discovered by DIR. Silas Lane, while in
the Rocky mountains. For diseases OF
the blood, liver and kidneys it is posi-.
tive cure. For constipation and clearing
up the complexion it does wonders
Children like it. Everyone praises it.
Large size package, so cents. At al
druggists.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27
ymeneal.

On Thursday afternoon at the residence
of the groom's mother, Mrs. Jacob Guck
ers, in Hampton. Miss Mary Smith was
united in. marriage to Mr.. Otto Guckert.
Squire W. X. Carey. of Carbon Cliff,
pronounced the bans in the presence of
the immediate relatives and friends.
Both young people have lived at Hamp-
ton since infancy, and have many friends
in the county who will wish them God
speed in their new life.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27

/ have been a periodical sufferer from
hay fever since the summer of 1879, and
until | used ElY's Cream Balm was never
able to find relief. | can truthfully say
that Cream Balm cured me. regard it
AS one of great value and would not be
without it during the hay fever season.
l.. M. Georgia, Binghampton. n. Y.
can cheeriully recommend Ely's
Cream Balm to the suffering public foI
hay fever and stoppage of the nasal pass
sages. | have tried it, and find it gives
immediate relief. E. Rector, Little
Rock, Ark.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27
jy245
A DEMONSTRATORS NOTICE.

Estate of William Farrell, deceased.
The undersigned having been appointed admin
istratrix Of the estate of William Farrell, late
OF the county OF Rock Island state of illinois, de
ceased, hereby gives notice that she will appear
before the county court o. Rock Island county, at
the Office Of the clerk of said court, in the city of
Rock Island, at the September term, on the first
Monday in September next, at which time all
persons having claims against said estate are no
tilted and requested to attend for the purpose of
having the same adj usted All persons indebted
to said estate are requested TO make immediate
payment to the undersigu ed.
Dated this Goth day Of j 1ly, A. u. 1889.
CATHERINE e. FARRELL,
july 20-d3w A dministrRtriN.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27
NOTICE TO CONTRACTORS.

Sealed proposals will be received at the Office OF
the City Clerk, at Rock Island, H., until O'Clock
p M.July 18th 1889, for the filling aud grading of
700 yards, more or less of dirt; also about 20
yards of stone to fill the ditch on the north and
east side of school building No. z, the work to be
done jointly by the city and school board. The
work to be under the Immediate supervision of
the superintendent of streets. subject to the ap-
proval OF the joint committees
specifications on file at the City clerks office.
Rock Island, ILL.,, July 10, 1889.
BY ORDER JOINT COMMITTEE
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-27

The best on earth can truly be said Of
Grigg's Glycerine Salve. which is a sure,
safe and speedy cure for cuts, bruises,
scalds, burns wounds and all other sores,
Will positively cure piles, letter and all
skin eruption. Try this wonder healer.
Satisfaction guaranteed or money refund-
ed. Only % cents. Sold by drugpists'