, 1889-05-31
FROg THE OTHER SIDE.
A LECTURE FOR HUSBANDS on
HOME DUTIES, BY A WOMAN.

Conduct-why Not BE sociabIe at Homer
One can seldom pick up a paper of mlscel-
laneous reading without coming across adj
vice TO wives to spend the major part Of their
existence In striving to retain their husbands
love and admiration Unquestionably this Is
right, md no good wife with n good husband
but will find 1t her supreme delight, as well
as duty, to daily strengthen the sweet cords
that bind them together. But there are other
sides to the question-shadowy, gloomy sides
and 1t Is toward those wives who arc con-
signed 10 dwell p~erennially In the gray, SOM
Der lives their lords and masters mako for
them thnt nm impelled to say my shy.
INJECT him at the door with a smile and a
hS"-that Is an old. beautiful and sensible
piece OF advice Init every wife in this coun-
try ought to be encouraged and able to carry
out from the very depths of her heart; but,
alnsl TINT only the husbands who are In tho
minority deserve.
WHISPERING II THE HUSBANDS EARS.
Suppose-nnd 1 call upon hundreds, aye,
thousands, of wives in our midst to witness II
l do not drnw q picture they recognize all too
rendily-tho vito hns been up and down all
night with the croupy baby, while its father
lay comfortably asleep. Well, take this wife,
who, after the nights anxiety, loss of restand
fatigue, has to get up and prepare breakfast,
ulJ6AlA " Alh = Hu uuIltH NlIn n tDllbIlIE
headache, caused by slecpnessness and conse-
quent irritability of tho stomach, TINT utterly
loathes tho idea of even toast md coffee,
while her handsome, well dressed, well
fed husband goes of for the day with a
well, Pm off; take care of yourselfrn Think
you, she will feel much like meeting him with
a bright, cheerful, sunny smile and a kiss
when no comes in, perhaps n half hour later
than usunl, with his greeting; Haven't you
Ind dinner yeti What did you whit for me
fort You know l detest having you wait.n
/ wish l could get the car Of the general
masculine public for just a little while and
whisper into 1t that perhaps 1t would DO quite
as well II the husbands took n little more
pains to retain their wives respect and affec-
ton According to tho inevitable law of
nhturo a woman cannot DO happy unless
somebody loves her, enthrones her, crowns
her and lets her know I'm unmistakable Ian
guage TINT such Is tho case. l AVE heard
men say; "Of course 1 love my wife. What
do you take mo fora brutei Well, no; not
exactly such q detestable thing, or that DELI
cate, ladylike little wife of yours never would
have married you But there Is a resem-
blhnce between you and that quadruped In
the fact that brutes mover speak their feel
ings. OF what use to me Is n gold mine In
Australia or n dinmond field In Brazil If the
riches of them are not quarriedl Where Is
the sense or reason of your loving your wife
II you never speak IL, or look 1t, or oct lit In
fact, you don't love her If you do none of
these things; for If there is a truer aphorism
than that murder will out" 1t Is that love
cannot DO concealed.
/ am well aware of the argument In favor
Of the sterner sox-that they arc all day ex-
posed to the friction of business, and, when
night comes, they ought to DO received into a
quiet, peaceful, happy home, where they
may don slippers and smoking jacket, and
read or doze on the library lounge until bed
time Very good But your wife is all day
subjected to something far worse than tho
contact with business annoyancos, and that
is tho monotonous, endless routine of domes-
tic drudgery, which, homo keeper, home
lover that she Is, wears and tears on the sem
sitive nerves In q why few men appreciate.
When evening comes, tho babies are asleep,
she wants a little eNhilnrating change, some
thing rather more effervescent than tho
pleasure Of feeling alone in the same rooms
she has occupied all day, watching tho hand
some features of her rccumbent lord, or i'm
mersed in the columns of a newspaper.
ON THE IT MONUMENT.
Now, which shall 1t BET Tho husbands
comfort or the wife'sl / can tell you the re-
suit, 1t will DO tho survival of the Httest,
and, as he is tho stronger physically, and gets
plenty of air and exercise, tho chances are
nino hundred and uinety-nine out a thousand
That before his eldest child is in its teens
there will DO a costly monument in some Sd
lent resting place-"Sacred to the memory
of my beloved wife" While, il Gods own
truth were carved ON that pure, white cross
In letters of blazing gold, they would read;
"a woman's life wasted; q heart d~isappoint-
vi unto death, hopes destroyed-by little
things.n
Yes, little thingsi 1 know a husband, a
bright, intellectual mnn, who is killing his
wife by his philosophy, +" he calls 1t, that he
never fails to air upon every occasion when
his wife is In distress or disappointment or
rouble. No matter how kecnly she feels any
pain, physical or emotional, he invariably
freezes her with his formula: "Well, what
nre you going to do about itr' Never q low
ing word of sympathy, a kiss or n cacess-and
yet he'd DO insulted il you told him he didn't
love borrower a word, at is too bad, dear;
but rs it Is unavoidable. amt l help you
bear itF' know that vito would sacrifice
ten years of her life il she could get out of
her mind that cold, judicial, unsympathetic
tone Of voice and look that she will carry
with her into eternity.
When that husband Is in straits, which he
often is, and is depressed physically, for he
Is not in good health, and unstrung nervous
ly, as is often the case; when his famous cold
hearted What arc you going to do about itg'
is temporarily s~ilenced-that wife of his, that
he never did deserve and is killing by do
grees, is all gentle, womanly sympathy, con-
slant attention, tender ministration and
hopeful encouragement. And the next time
he RECEIVERS the full force of his gigantic In
~tellect, and it is her turn to reap a reward, 1t
comes like Banquo's ghost upon her, "Idon't
sec what you are going to do about it.n
But perhaps the wife to be most pitied is
she whose husband, while mean, smally abus-
i've and t%yrannicalin little things-who treats
her Off and on as II she were his head servant
without a salary, instead of his equal in head
and heart, whose petty discourtesies and in
attentions, familiar though they are, always
causo the same hopeless pang of despair to
chill her heart-this husband who, when COM
pany is around, is so sweet, and polite, and
elegant, and joking, and complimentary to
her. And she, trying to forget the parting
words, perhaps, Of the morning; under
stand this, the next time you invite company
! wish to DO formally consulted, as l believe
l run this to save her immor-
tai soul, look or feel pleased when ut table
that man tells the guests ''how no enjoys tho
delightful surprises his dear little wife gets