davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02

Labouchrre. of London TRUTH is the
only EnSli>!,inan who can write edito-
rialS that are not dull and that is proba-
bly, because OF his i>re'1>'l blood He is
now maki:ir terrific war OH the high
silk hat II" b"ys tAH Prince Of Wales
to give it its final leave. Labouchere has
also this to say about the British nation:
"It strikes me that we should, as a ma
ton, show to much better advantage in
the eyes of the world if there were q lit
tie less prudery in our public Morals,
and little more hG1lanity and consis-
tency-if we did not strain at gnats
while we are swallowing scorpions"
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02
How FISHES CLIMB HILLS.
A Curious and Interesting Story of Some
of Their Habits.

A Curious and Interesting Story of Some
of Their Habits.
In that fascinating book on natural
history, ga Frozen Dragon" is an ex-
planation of the phenomenon that trout
are often found in mountain streams,
far up toward their source, in deep pools
and eddics:
In one pool, out of which led direct
fall of three feet, there were numbers
of the richly tinted little creatures, that
to have attained their position must
either have SWum up the fall or gone
around by laild. After catching a num-
: Der tvgan TO frighten the others to see
what they would do
Some dashed ut the little fall and dis
appeared, whiic others darted over and
SWAN down stream Still farther up
found the sp,vkled game, until finally
the passage became so difficult that was
obliged to turn back. In the village
chanced to mention the subject to a
friend who owned the mill on the same
stream, and he told me that the fishes
ascent was a puzzle to him, until one
day his boy called him out to the dam,
where the riddle was solved. The dam
was nearly four feet high, and to relieve
the stream several auger holes had been
bored in it, allowing small stream OF
water to jet forcibly out and to go splash
ing down into the clear pool below. As
my friend approached the spot and look
Led through the bushes several large sized
trout were seen moving under the mimic
fall, evidently in great exeitement crIangd1 IND
darting into it as if enjoying the =
and roar of the water.
Suddenly one of the fish made quicE
rush that sent it up the falling stream
so that it almost gained the top; but by
an unlucky turn it was caught and
thrown back into the pool, where it dart
ed away, evidently much startled.
| Soon another made the attempt, dart
ing at it like the first, and then rapidly
swimming up the fall, but only to meet
the fate of it's predecessor. This wal
tried number of times, until finally &
trout larger than the others made dash
mounted the stream, and entered thu
round hole.
The observers were almost ready tt
clap their hands, but it was not success
full yet AS the water stopped flowing
for moment, they saw that, though th'
athletic trout had surmounted the fall
the hole was too small for it to pas
through, and there the poor fish wa
| lodged. The lockers on hastened to re
lieve it, and found that it's side or pee
toral fins were caught in the wood, but
by pushing the fish ahead, which yo'
may be sure they did, they liberated it
/ and it darted away into the upper pond
Here, then, was the explanation. Th
trout climbed the mountain by swim
ming up the falls, darting up the foam
ing masses, and adopting every expe
dent to accomplish their journey. Fo
these fish deposit their eggs high u
stream, SO that the young fry, whel
hatched, may not be disturbed by preda
tory fish and other foes living in tn
| lower waters,
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02

Not till the Wild West show visited
Paris did the artist Meissonier conclude
there was anything worth painting in
America He has decided now to visit
our country, Meissonier lost most of
his great fortune in the copper syndicate
crash last spring, and he will try to win
it back off the Americans. Like most
foreigners, Meissonier doubtless imagines
Indians and buffalo roam at will through
our cities, and dashing cowboys lasso
wild cattle in our fashionable avenues.
How disappointed he will be to find
hat all the Indians for him to pain ta are
ECO signs and Those ferocious
a SUSPICIOUS Hibernian
.bulate our streets be-
advertisements
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02
The Song of the Sparrow,

1t would be impossible to rid this
country of the English sparrow. The
pertinacity of the pest was never better
illustrated than by the British sailors
bit of doggerel, which runs:
The bloomin', bleedin' sparrow went up the
-; bloody spout:
The bleedin' rain came down and washed the
..f...' bloomin' sparrow out. ."'.s
The bloody sun came out and dried up the bleed
-. in rain.
And the bloomin', bloody sparrow went up the
bleedin' spout again.
Chicago Herald
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02

In his new novel w D. llowells makes
one character express the opinion that
ST. 900 Il year is about As much as a man
can honestly earn. Another character
makes the remark that not the most
gifted person who ever lived could
honestly earn Il million dollars in the
practice of any art or science. But Patti
has earned more than that sum, and it
can hardly be said that she got it dis
honestly or ever robbed the poor.
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02

1t is the stransest thing in life that the
White Car still fails to see what plain
to every other civilized human being,
that attempts to blow him upwith dyna-
mite or otherwise destroy him will con-
stantly be made until he gives his people
q constitutional government No pure
dcspotisn, can stand in this age of the
,~,>rII
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02

The science of medicine is a solemn
matter, and will bear no foolishness. In
Burlington. n. j., q woman was i'll of
ii1ease the regular physician pronounced
incurable. a negro doctor" so called,
took the case in hand and cured the pa
tient. Then the physicians had him ar
rested for practicing without a diploma.
The logic of this case is that it is better
for doctor with diploma to let wo-
man die than to cure her without one.
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02

A writer in the New York Evening
Sun suggests distinctive feature for the
worlds fair of 1892. We caunot have an
Eitfel tower, for the French have had
that already. The only thing left for us
is therefore to dig hole in the ground,
the deepest that ever was dug. Then we
can let the defeated candidate of '92
crawl into it to the music of brass bands
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02

At last there is a place where it is a
disadvantage to have white skin. At
last the white man is going to get lit
tie of his come-up-ance for his impudent
determinations against other races. The
Chickasaw Indian nation has resolved to
disfranchiSe its white voters. Shall the
Caucasian submit to this outrage?
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02
Half Fare--5 Harvest ExCur-
SiOnS.
August 9th and 10th, September 10th and
24th, and October 9th,

= Thn MINNEAPOLIS s. ST. LOUIS
Rf. ('Aibeft lea Route", will sell
upon the above NAMED dates round
trip excursion tickets to points in
Minnesota, Dakota, Nebraska, Kan
sas, Texas, Mississippi, Tennessee,
Indian Territory, Colorado, Idaho,
New Mexico, Montana, Wyoming,
Arizona, Missouri, iowa, Louisiana
AMI Alabama at rate of ONE FARE
for The round trip. Tickets good 80
days from date of sale. Stop-over>
granted In tile territory to whirl,
tickets are sold. For information re
garding rates, maps, call on; any
agent, or write to
f-',- G.. Fl. HoLDRIDGE,
-.-s 't.:.. c. y. & p. \.
Minneapolis, Mimi. 3ltI
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02

Edwin Arnold wv;:; to Philadelphia
for the express purr'ose of taking by
the hand that good ana old poet, Walt
Whitman" He fc"rS Whitman is not
appreciated in America ai h. deserves
Whitman's ode t. ':>.lt!, beginning,
Come. lovely and soothing dcath,' Ar
mold says he himself has translated into
many European and Asiatic tongues.
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02

The displaying of flags every day over
postof6ces and other government build
ings is rather uncomfortable for the be-
holder till lie gets used to it. He in
stinctively thinks at first sight either that
it is the Fourth of July or that some old
pol3ician is dead.
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02

If the lamp fails to act the penny is au-
tomatically returned to the owner. No
American machine would ever do that
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02
A Five Cent Hello"

In 1884 the "Society General of Tele-
phones" as the French call their tele-
phone company, received a charter from
the French government. One condition
of the charter was that if at any time
the government itself should decide to
take possession of the telephone system
it could do so by paying the company a
proper value.
Now, though it is republic, France is
O paternal republic. This summer the
government decided that the telephone
business was too vast a monopoly to be
in the hands of private organization,
and notified the company that it must
give up possession. Two million dollars
were appropriated for the purchase 1t
was as if President Harrison and his
minions should order the Western Union
Telegraph company to vacate all its Off
ces and hand over all it's wires to the
United States. To say that the Society
General of Telephones was displeased
would be too mild. 1t was furious 1t
declined to give all inventory of the
property and paid no attention to the
summons.
Then the government sent officials, &C
companied by police, on given day, to
all the telephone offices in the country,
and quietly took possession of them. The
thing was done Oh a Sunday. A blood
less revolution was effected, and though
there were loud French sputtering and
wrath, only one arrest was made. That
was the captur' of q lucklesS artist who
was caught caricaturing fat policeman
for funny pap i.
The government immediately reduced
the price of an annual telephone sub
scription from S12J to S75, and the price
of short conversation over the wires in
Paris itself fr,m 10 cents to cents.
And now the french hello girl must
f1irt under government surveillance.
That is how they do things in Europe
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02

An English genius has applied a fresh
idea to the nickel-in-the-slot machines.
An electric lamp for reading is affixed to
the compartments Of railway cars. If
you put a heavy English copper penny
In the slot, and at the same time press a
knob, an electric lamp will suddenly
light itself. When you have read half
an hour the lamp concludes you have
got your, penny's worth and automatic
ally extinguishes itself. If you want to
read more you must feed the slot with
another copper cart wheel. There is,
however, one feature Of this lamp that
stamps it as distinctively un-American.
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02


WIHH commercial travellers
NU lA business men and others
has revealed:
That the Wisconsin entral has the
unqualified eddorsement of all;
That the Wisconsin Central has to-day
the most popular line between Mime
apolis, st. Paul and Milwaukee and
Chicago;
That the Wisconsin Central is dialy
adding to its admirers as the recognized
Pullman line between Minneapolis,
st. Paul and Milwaukee and Chicago;
That the Wisconsin Central touches the
most prominent points in Wisconsin,
and that it has more important business
centers on its through line than any
other railway in the Northwest;
That the Wisconsin Central has made
an enviable reputation with It's peer
less Dining Car Service;
That the Wisconsin Central runs fast
trains on which all classes of passen-
gers are carried with commodious and
distinct accommodation for all;
That the Wisconsin, Central has repre-
sentatives distributed throughout the
country, who will cheerfally give any
information that may be desired and
that its terminal agents are especially
Instructed to look after the comfort of
passengers who may be routed via its
line.
For detailed information, apply to
your nearest ticket agent or to represeh-
tatives of the road.
s. r. AINSLIE, II. G. BARLOW,
Gen. Mana'r, Gen. Traf. Mana'r.
LOUIS ECKSTETN,
Assistsnt General Passenger and Ticket Agt a..
MILWAUKEE, WIS.
r. n. ANSoN, Northwestern Passenger
Agent, No. 10 Nicollet House Block, Minne
apolis, MINI.
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02
STEVENS, EDITOR.

" .lNESDAT, OCT. >. 1889,
Morris tribune., 1889-10-02
HER WORK IS NEVER DONE
SIMPLY BECAUSE THERE ISN'T
ENOUGH SYSTEM ABOUT y,

If Housekeeping Is PrOneriiyf Systematized
1t Can Ee Finished just as Mans La
-r pors Are-Plans Suggested by Lady
Who Has Studied the Subject.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1889-04-28
gHE DAliY TINES SUNDAY. APEit ". 1889.

yo ..gyei,anc. ard no ''iarsiness DOuy y
ltdv aud behaves like one. She u c"re'"'
vho,n she er,tertains She IS as ,iemuro as II
,uritan damscl as jolly rs n Parislan bone
,isnne She plays at housekeeping most
hocriiy
Cr,y eyeI Dolly l. young wood carver
She .iipunrt- herself by one Of The newest o.
un,tisu. found practicable for woTneIl Que
las three dainty rooms in the last place YOU
,ouid dream of-ovor n stable DeiighuuHt
r...v raor,,s they are. where bric-a-piac
...iei al, i'm an manner ~ odd places. sum
u,r sketches and winter studies, old plaster
.s.fs and new panels. inexpensive hanging
,..l sudden flashes of color in scarlet ribbons.
faia.i noor, and kouia rugs make one Tor
a.t i'.nf such things as Turkey carpets, silheh
tx.n. Louis XVI chairs AMI old Ne're
him, we're ever by anybody deemed des'
.lIe Grav eyed Dolly is wholly self dels
rt sle ha- supported herself since She wns
d, Sine fired Of hall bedrooms. She doesn l
rs. the arcary atmosphere OF the average
ty baarlling house. She dos like her own
,f-f.,,.f If "A stable home, where she has
sf and an open fire and can follow the inno
rnf inclination. 81 her own sweet VIII
There are girl bachelors wh' write who
auf. uho act. who are shorthand writers
md typ.nliier-. all wing 10y themselves or
PROSPEROUS induiging in the society Of q
maid one OF the pleasantest OF these ne"
Establishments belongs 20 n woman IA hef
uiI-fu.utic. vino earns $3.50 a year rs
,u,er in tine children, cloak department Of "a
,ig dry cqois house, and takes in two other
.irl. ON smaller wages TO share IN her luxury
an mi. new race of independent women keep
r,alf cree from scandal Ten years ago their
lie would have been impossible Now 10 Is
r.rcoly commented on. All hail 20 the
.ounr Old uaidl-New York Mail AMI tx.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1889-04-28

h.fi gcfe engaged win some of tnC
Johnnies Ia a game Of poker. The Of.
ncers did not stop. but quietly rode past
not without looking at me in q peculiar
manner Soon after single horseman
rode mp. He had on a slouchcd hat. ON
old blouse and his brooches were stuck
in a pair Of old boots.
"Riding up 10 mo he said; Sergeant.
what are yon doing here!
".On picket duty. replied.
Where are your mem
"'Oh. over there playing poker J
said. nodding nay head in their direction
II thought that be- was a correspond.
ent for some paper and answered him
saucilv. Asking nay name, regiment
and company. be rode away. ! ffns o
parting shot at him as hr did 80, asking
him if be- was not in4uisitive. When SIC
were relieved. 1 was called to the cap
iains quarters. whore ] was informed
that Gen. Grant had preferred charge
AGAINST me. IL was hc 20 whom ! mad
been mpudcnt. When the captain tola
me that was under arrest. liable % b,
shot. felt like sinking into the ground.
The sergeant lost his office and had e.
carry a bag of sand around quarters im
n while: but hc is rather glad OF 10 now.
as il sicnalized his personal acquaintance
with Grant.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1889-04-28

then b. have been Cack n ;iirols. out /
had not thc'moral courage 10 holt and
consider what to do: kept right on.
When we reached a point from which
the valley below was in full view ] halt
ell The place where Harris had been en-
camped few days before showed traces
of recent camping. bot Che troops were
gone. My heart resumed its place. II
occurred to me at once that Harris had
been as much afraid Of me rs had been
Of him This was a view Of tine qucs
ton had never taken before. bat it.was
one never forgot afterwards. From
that event To the close al the war mover
experienced ircpidation upon confront.
ing an enemy. though always felt more
or less anxiety. never forgot that he
had as much reason 10 fear nay forces as
had his. The lesson was valuable.
This extract from Grants book settles
that he did sometimes feel fear and get
excited. The same work shows his liter.
airy STYLE and incidentally something OF
his religion. Any close reader of the
book will observe that it contains only
the most necessary references 20 the
churches. an Episcopal church in Mem.
phis. for instance. is mentioned. just as
a Roman commander in Judea might
incidentally refer 10 the temple. Noi
did Gen. Grant ever write or say any
thing more definite till ia his last sick
ness when. declining the offer Of friend
TO bring a minister. ho gave his views.
which that friend summed up thus in The
pr,,L lon Eaglp.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1889-04-28

Like all earnest men Ibsen is easy 20 carl
azure. for Dee goes 90 the edge Of the absurd
There has been hue and cry about him all
yer Germanic Europe and particularly In
,orlm That he is a master Of his art, that
Dis pieces play saperhly, has only made the
attacks on him thc harsher People said that
.e was % pes,imist-as if "A man who believe
..auff4liv in progress could be- pessmi,t-
hal in L.. hands the dramatic art bad become
fafory. the stage ro.trum, that he was q
uaii,t. hc no longer believed IN the genuine
- should saw heuotorious-German Ideals
mus. as 10 the real world OF art and letters
ared what particular rules Of yaristick crit.
ci-m ara m vogue at Berlin. In spite Of all
bis. however. there are multitudes vino read
lhsen with great pleasure.
$50 FAR as my experience goes he has an ok
.raordiuary Influence on young men. That
influence. however. is not a personal one a
,killml teacher sometimes frames for hi-
'iass problem the solution of which lead
hem 90 general law that lies behind 10
fhe student is delighted with the tangibility
Of bis new knowledge, and proceeds So eager
is o. apply o.. that. remembering tho law
fhe important thing, he fOrgets the particu
Ear steps by which the teacher he'd him
fO it.. sometimes he forgets entirely The
part of the teacher So 10 is with lDsen
dramn of bis presents truth ST.
dlimliy that one is eager 10 apply 10 10 an
thcr problem and. eated with SUCCESS. ono
IS apt io forget tine way in which the truth
gas first brought to him. Sometimes la the
ucw cuthu ia.ns which come from readine
lbsou's plays. ono forgets Ibson himself -
serhnr. Masnllne.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1889-04-28

Richard F0oto recently had novel expert
nee 40 pankuton d. r. When Mr. Foot,
arrived n Plauknton from Chamberlain D.,
.ound that the manager Of tho Pankiuton
spera house bad billed his first night engage
ment f,r "Richari III. although tho actor
aad given instructions % be- billed for "Othel-
on Zee played "Othello, however, despite
.he fact that be- bad been billed for Chester
50 the iall of the curtain he came forward
and explained the reason for tho confusion
lni announced that he would play Richard
% OBJ. following night The manager OF the
lou-. ihercupon jumped 10 bis feet and an
lngry debate followed, Mr. Foote declaring
that Doe would play Richard III in th,
opera bouse on the following night and the
manager affirming that be should not The
audience listened attentiyely 60 the debate
but remained neutral and went homo when
the discussion ended But Mr. Footc aui biz
entire company staid They campel all
night on ths stage, aud when tho marshal
came % eject them De was confronted at tae
doorway with Mr. Foote's brace of mastils
80 pap.rs were served aud the marshal re
t.reA The company remained in the theatre
and 3lr 'o0ta kept his word by appearing
Richard III tiat lisht-New YORK Star
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1889-04-28

Miss DE SNeet-Do YOU Use pelrls}
Mr NicefelloW-l do got care COS separate
pearls, they arc too tame. hut admire
them in ROWS or clusters
Miss De- 5. So do 1 II there is anythinl
I love- 90 is a pearl nera.ace-hr1a pearls
sou know Pa gave me one some years ago.
but although 10 Is very handsome, do NOT
care much Tor lt. because tne pearls 49,,
rather small
1lr. N-Ohl Small pearls should never
be- put into a nccsIacc Only the largest slzl
arc worthy Of such disp.a. For my part
much prefer diamond necklaces
Miss Do S.-Areut they lovely Tie pure
white diamonds especially
Mr. N-Ycs IT, pity though. the col
ored diamonds arcout oi fashion. but th,us
they are coming back saw necsllcs t0.
day with every tenth diamond col0reI and
the effect was wonderfully brilliant f. was
at Biiiany s. quito cheap. too By tho way.
will YOU marry met
Miss DE S-Ohi This is 30 suidenl Yes.
my love, viii
Miss DcSweet half an hour later-Clara
Nubbns next door, Is engaged too. but /
think her lover showed shockln. taste in the
selection Of her ring. it is SD biz and clumsy
and. besides, II seems sort OF bra1n. It i,
six large diamonds ret with pearls.
Mr. Nirefeiiow-Fo For am engagement ring
there Is nothing heater than plain goli BIZ
fauy has them Tor dollar.-New York
Weekly
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1889-04-28

\ Springfield woman, with AN invalid has
band who was not expected 10 live, thought
she would take time by tho forelock and TN
gagged a drcssmaker several weeks ago %
10 make fun suit of mourning for her This
week the dreSsmaser received "a letter stating
that the looked for event bad not yet taken
place. and the vito bad decided 10 wait until
the death Of her husband %, she wished lor
,ait made IN the latest style. This cheerful
postscript was added 10 the letter please
40 not get discouraged about IT, You will
be- sure of tho job sooner or late" Spring
field Homestead
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1889-04-28

"Mstah Johnsing hyah dat yoh had a
very interestin' seshun ob de Straight Flush
club de odlah obening-"
YES san. dere wur some excitin' times.
shoh's yoh bohu.'
"Wlat were do 'casion ob de excitement. p
Hit were disher way Lemuel Shvins bee
done open DO john pot wuf erbout fohty
bones M hit. Dey wuz ioh in de game ]
come orlong wuf my money and Gabe Sink
erscn stand. and Jud Cumberland be done de
same Lemuel he done stood pat, an De re-,
Of us drawed from one to three cyahds, as the
Emergencies happened TO require. Lemucl
bet one chip, and Sinkerson followed him wuf
a raise. aud we all stayed in De game like
men. ebIy Teller raisin' de bet as his turn
came Finally Lemuel be done called Sink
arson, and We all showed down, and Lemuel
tool, de pot "
"Mhat did You all habf"
"Sinkerson had three kings an a Jack
knife. had flush and a pah Of brass knuck-
les. Jud Cumberland had aces up an a
FahzoF'
But what did Lemuel habsn
lie had "A pab Of fohs an a revolver. -
Merchant Traveller
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1889-04-28
NII,ed Up In Making Change.

Il is odd how confusing some little prob
lens in figures will sometimes be- A gentle
man sat in business mans office writing q
letter, the proprietor being close at hand
When he had finished he asked for a stamp
and his friend pulled open drawer in the
desk and handed him one OF the little portraits
of George Washington The guest gave him
a nickel. and was In return given three pen
MES. As be was placing these in his poke.
be thought Of playing a trick, and dropping
one Of the pennies produced tho other two
saying: why, here, George, / could have
given YOU the exact amount, az the same
time rendering him the coppers His friend
took them and gave back tho nickel he still
seld, pocketing the pennies without a word
OF protest. The guest departed. but the next
day came in again, and he was greeted toy
the proprietor the first thing with. "Say
Tom, about that stamp He got no further.
for the laugh on the visitors face showed
him the job had been put up.-Chicago Her
aid