Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1889-11-13
the DOMESTIC COW.
A Smart Yeurg Man Investigates He.
tnamtable Traits.

The poet has, from time iminemo-
rial, eulosized the domestic Gu (Sax-
ON, Koe tDutch). or Cow Modern
English). He has done so without
having taken the trouble to investi.
gate those unarhiable traits in her
character which it is the object of
this article to criticise. He (the post)
seems only to have seen her in her
Sunday Clothes, ~ it were grazing in
the fragrant meadows or standing Mt
ease in tho shadows OF the babb ing
brooklet. es,s ~ sss,
My hired man recently attended
firemen's picnic. not wisely, but too
well; and, after repeated drinks, he
very isaprudcn.ly locked horns with {.
larger man on the question Of tariff re-
form. Need say more? Only this:
That he was assisted home by friends,
suffering from severe indispositiun
and with his features sadly out Of ra-
pair; so that, on tho following morn-
ing. from sense OF duty. | arose be.
times to milk the domestic Gu (Sax-
on). just as the first pale streaks of
dawn appeared in the EASTERN sky.
Girding on some old clothes, !
started forth to seek the Koe (Duteh).
She had unlocked the gate OF the
pasture with her horns. and was then
in the act of inspecting the flower
garden. She had evidently been there
for some time, during which she had
not been idle, and her manner was Oh
tirely free from excitement.
Approaching with smile which
has seldom failed to win female re-
gard, 1 said In soothing tones: "Soh,
bossyl sob, bossyr' but, after cycling
me cosnprehensively for few mo-
ments, she backed leisurely over
valuable rhododendron bush, and
then started through the shrubbery ut
swinging gait.
1t would be painful to recount the
incidents of that exciting chase. l
got her in the barn at last, and sue
ceeded in Delaying her head to the
manger, after which said: "Stand
over" in a distinct tone of voice. She
knew that wanted her to move to the
left so that l could get room to milk
her; but wilfully appearing to misun-
stand the order. she ''stood over" to
the right side, fattening me against
the stall.
Did swear? No. gentle reader. /
did not. Why did l not swcarP Be-
cause the weight OF the Gu (Saxon)
prevented respiration. Gathering
myself together as one man, hurled
her across the stall by u supreme ef-
fort, and standing the hay-ferk where
she could see it, prepared TO milk.
Any one who has watched the opera
ton of milking q cow will maintain
that it is a very simple thing TO do. ]
used to think so myself, but 1t is a
great mistake. | am ready to explain
to any one who will listen to me for a
few hours, that it ID difficult, very diff
licult to milk Koc (Dutch). unless
there is a mutual understanding
4 friendly feeling between the parties;
which, in any case, there was not
Having seated myself under the star
board quarter, l grasped the pail
firmly between my knees, as I had
seen the hircling do, and commenced
to milk. No milk came for five
minutes, during which time worked
CA an silence. while the Gu jcrked
angry mouthfuls of hay out OF the
manager, ever and anon lashing her
tail against my hat, and looking
a7wuAd with sarcastic smile, which,
however, pretended not TO notice,
but ut last = snowy jet saot straight
into my left eye, and, in = short time,
anctAer impaired an unnatural
warmth to my l~yN hid succeeded
in bringing forth the sailk; all that re-
msiAed was to di rect it into the pail,
This was not to be so easily done as
you wosald suppose
In xleeen minutes had brought
forth smenty-six squirts, distributed IA
follows Three In the left eye, one ia
tho right. eleven on my troasers, two
on KSe's sail. five on the kern floor.
and the kAlars,e in the kettle
JUST then The kaai1>maideA appeared
and asked |; I had finished milking.
She said tAat the family were waiting
for breakfast, and there was no milk
for the coffee. told her to wait a few
minutes that had not quite Gnish,sd
Leaning one Cirnpled arm nn an I'd
jacent hay cutter she watched my
efforts with increased amnxes,cni, and