Morning journal and courier., 1889-03-29
NE W.

Ted Gotham-"Have you seen the new pantomime, Miss De Beane?" Miss De Beane, (with hauteur)-"Pardon me. Mr. Gotham. Do you refer to the etrouseromine?', -Waif
 He (who has been hanging fire all winter) -"Are you fond of puppies, Miss SmithF' She (promptly)-"What singular way you have of proposing, Edgardo. Yes, darling. " And now the cards are out.-To-day. No Objection-Tenaweek-" wish to marry your daughter" Gruff Father-"My daughter, young man, will continue under the parental roof" Tenaweek-"No ob- jection will be raised to that, sir."-Har- per's Bazar.
 ..naHan "When 1Ts were you .abEoad, MT. Pigment'" quently have Paris, 's7,' below your sigma ture." "Ah, yes. That is nothing but an artistic touch, you know. Gives igo' to the picture. ."-Harpers Bazar.
 "What lncky chap Quimby was!" s'How so." 'Why fortune played into his hands all his life." "Yes, but he died in his prime" ::That's where his luck still stayed with him. When he died coffins were sell ing at cost. ."-Nebraska State Journal
 Nothing New.-Mrs. Fangle-"Well, this is strangel" MT. Fangle-"What is it, my dearT "A man in Paris has taught an ape to black his shoes." ooh, there's nothing remarkable about that, my dear. I've often heard of monkeY~shines. ."-H Harper's Bazar.
 A Montreal man has patented device by which, as he somewhat vaguely claims, he can make years supply of ice for seyenty- five cents. After all, it isn't the ice that costs so much, it is the sugar and lemon, the Angostura and-and the rest of it.-Detroit Free Press.
 First Chappie- Why, Algernon, deah boy what IS the mattahs You look weak and aho ->h,, ,soso Second Chappie-''My deah fellah, have. The doctah says it is the wesult of violent exertion and has advised me to discahd my eyeglass. life.
 Mrs. Church to Mrs. Meetinghouse.-sI did so want to go to the whist club tonight, but it is Lent, you know, and we have to give up the things we want most to do and do the things we dislike; and so concluded I'd run in and spend the evening with you" Lowell Courier
 My friends and fellow citizens" began the impassioned orator." the gentleman whom we are about to nominate is a man way beyond suspicion" s'Sure, that's what he isl" shouted an opposing voter. "What we've got agin him is all facts. ."-One of Phil Welch's Last.
 Jones-'What does the doctor say is the matter." Smithley Gin bed e"Inaammatory rheumatism in-my legs" Jones (holding up pair of the new ballon style of trousers) -s'Did you wear those yesterdaya" ssYes." 'No wonder you got the rheumatism with trousers big enough to hold cyclone."- Chicago Herald.
 Conversation actually overheard on a street car: "An' how is your frind Mrs. O'Brine, Mrs. Mulcahys' ''Sure, it's bad way she's in, Mrs. Finucane! Sufferin' day an, night, and no hope from the docthers, for the dis ayse is fattle, so they say" "An' what is the disayse, Mrs. Mulcahy?' "Ulsters in the stomach. Mrs. Finucane. ."-Boston Tran script.
 No Need to Send Out.-The Rev. MT. Be- hindthetimes-"Emily will you please send out to get Sunday papera I am-er-pre- pairing to preach 8 sermon against Sunday newspapers, and I must have one to exam inc" Wife (to daughters up stairs)-"Girls if you have finished looking through the bar gain announcement in that paper, bring it down. Your father wants is."-Chicago Tribune