St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1889-09-07
TIE COUNTRY EDITOR.
soMg OF TaI EXPERIENCES or tbs
BURIAL DISPENSER OF NEWS.

patrons and the public in general
Though out OF the newspaper bust
ness nov and enjoying n life Of peace
and comfort. my sympathiss are
ever with the ovsrworked manipu-
lators OF thu shears. paste and
pencil. and thinking that your read
ers would like to know som sthing oil
the mysteries Of . printing Office. u
with your permission, I will relate
y few incidents Of every day occur
romeo in all well regulated" coun-
try Offices. Nv editor I will call
Col. Hardwork. and locate his Of
nee in Louisiana town, Just for
convenience sake.
PARISH ELECTION.
This il ono Of tho most important
events in rural journalism. Col.
Hardwork notes the nance Of the
prominent gentlemen mentioned a
candidates for the respective Offices.
and he has his pockets strongly
sewed in order to hold the vast
amount Of money people generally
suppose he receives for annouce-
ments. He is met on every corner
by . candidate; is told 10 pitch Into
Tom Flint. and show Sam Kelly up
a. . gambler and hog thief, and
Mat O. Brien for beating his wife.
and Carl Pfeisteritz for keeping bis
saloon open on Sunday. and Ssrro
Gsvsno. who hasn't haturalizea. and
. thousand aud one other wrong
doings the great numbsr Of candi-
dates have been accused Of. Col.
Hardwork thinks the public ought
to kno~ these things. but does not
like to mako himself a target for
pitchforks. pickaxes. beer bottles.
stilettOs. or pistols. and consequent
" confines himself to discussion
Of party principles aud the leading
issues Of the day. urging upon the
people the necessity of selecting
good. honest aud competent Off
ciala. He scores the republicans.
scstters his papers broadcast over
the parish. msrcEes in torchlight
PROFESSIONS. attends mass meetings,
ETC.. and works day aud
night for the success Of the grand
old party. which puts her men in |
by = email majority.
kesult-One-half the announce
nents not paid for because the
was defeated; the bill for |
papers ordered by the campaign |
is thrown iu.o the waste, |
basket; all the fellows that got mad |
have stopped their paper. and Col.
Hsrdwork finds his pockets sewed
30 strong that he cannot get any
money out Of them.
GIVE IT TO EN-.
Scene-Crowd If men sitting on !
street. tCol. Hardwork sppea-s and |
oins groMo.)
Judge Hardnut ~ say. Colonel.
Why dou's you pitch into those fol.
Ows about the way they are build
ng the new court h0usef Il 10 y |
crying shame. They have only left |
: platform 8xI0 for the Judge"
Mr.. Won Pheltum-'.Yss, uud
Icy bought deere lime in st. LOnis.
md ! could have soldt It 10 dsm for |
only fifteen cents profit . barrel"
Col. Gentlemen,
The parish has vsry little money to
pay for this work. owing 10 the low
rate ut which property IL assessed.
and besides the work was lot Out
% the lowest bidder according to
he plans aud specifications fuuish-
ID " the police jury. aud il being
done subject ~ their approval.
Judge. l am on . little cAnvassing
our this evening; do you need any
tationery2"
Judge Hardnut-"No, ] believe
lot; l have just received . lot i
,rdersd from New York"
Col. Hsrdwork-''How 10 it viii,
ou. Mr.. Won Pheltum9"
Won Pheltum-'Oh. just got
Don't fifty dollars worth from
,hicago. I get it = leetle shesper
~ dere dan here"
Col. aardwork belongs to no
hurch. but gives what Ls 10 able to
II Of them. advertisss for them at
'slf rates. charges only enough for
Oh work to c0vor actual cost. and
ct il he cannot pers0nslly attend .
burch fair or s0ciable. buy chances
u . cake. write up two colnmns anil
~ something pleasing about every
'ody that was present. Why his
old paper amt no count" and
ne or tx0 doting fathers. who have
ot paid . subscription for six years.
nd who ows pow rent in their
will order the paper stop
I'D and forget 10 send a post Office
money oIdor. -egistersd letter. N.
!. exchange. or express money
sckage in payment Of arrearagss.
THE PEOPLE OUGHT To Know. |,
Good morning. Col Hard work.
oms in; I ~as just getting ready
, send . boy to vour Office to tell
on TO come around IL yOn want n
,>.~I sN.... Va go k.~> ..>l~I