Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-08-28
The TOPICAL TALKER.
Some Of the Ways In which tho Drowsy
God IL Wooed.


God IL Wooed.
HAVE you ever noticed how various are the
ways Of men and women in wooing sleepf For
a while past I've been making notes in this
field, and though only a few have given me an
account of their habits the result of the opser-
walton is rather interesting.
Nearly everyone appears to have well-marked
lines Of action. or perhaps it is more accurate
to say inaction, in approaching the drowsy
god This man must be on his right side. that
on his left, another on his back, before he
thinks of shutting his eyes. Everyone of them
is convinced that if he took any hut the exact
position he affects he would remain awake in.
definitely. These varieties Of habit and varied
again in themselves For instance, man
know has to lie on his back for about ten
minutes, and then quietly rolls over to his
right side with the immediate result OF being
in the land of dreams at once. Another man
who is a brain worker, and is therefore predis-
posed to restlessness at night, has regular set
Of maneuvers. through which he goes nightly
in his search for slumber. To begin with he
wants the right edge of the bed, and he insists
on lying on his right side with his right arm
and hand extended at full length. If his brain
yields easily to the invitation OF its
owner to put up the shutters and
cease work these movements are suf-
icient to bring unconsciousness. But
should the machinery of the brain rattle on
and show no signs of stopping, then the hunt
for sleep calls forth new leash OF hounds.
The restless mortal deliberately takes the pill
low. excavates an opening into the bed at its
foot and goes through series OF tactics
similar 70 the first tried. When this fails he
knows that sleep is out Of the question and he
generally gets up, dresses and takes book
tilb he is actually tired out They say Corporal
Tanner. Commissioner of Pensions, is victim
to extreme measures of this kind.
50
SOME men and more women must have
light of some sort or other in their sleeping
chamber; while the majority OF both sexes are
in favor of perfect darkness.
I am reminded of the case Of two ladies re-
siding in this county who were good sleepers
enough, but very easily walked. Just outside
their chamber door was a gas jet which was
left burning all night The light from this did
not shine into the room but a single ray of 1t
fell upon the polished surface of a wardrobe.
Neither OF these ladies could have closed an
eye with that little ray shut out. More than
this on several occasions some laundering moth
or beetle would make pyre Of that gas jet and
extinguish the tiny fame with its ashes, and
as soon as the Pickering ray ceased to throb
upon the wardrobe panels the slumbers Of the
two sleepers were broken also.
Probably were the investigation OF SAis SUBJ
ject carried further it would be found that the
idiosyncrasies Of women as to finding the pearly
gates of sleep are far more numerous and pict-
uresque than those of the stronger sex. For but
a limited pursuit OF the inquiry has revealed no
little anecdotal matter involving women as the
actors
How many women there are in this land of
the free and the fair who indulgein the whole
some and refreshing afternoon sleep. You.
have seen the transformation this American
siesta will work in a woman, haven't you?
She's spent all the morning in fatiguing exer.
cis-perhaps has had a pitched battle with the
cook, and an executive session with the prom
Using 6-year-old; has mended half dozen gar
ments. cnased the Maltese cat out of the par
lor, and not till the lunch hour has passed does
she get minute to herself. Then, with blinds
drawn down, a loose wrapper on in place of a
dress like medieval coat of mail, she lays her
head upon the cool pillow and sinks away in
the midsummer hush to the shores Of some
imagined river.
She gets up a few hours later. and, rearrayed
in some cool dress, greets her husband as he
comes home hot, dusty and cross. with a smile
and refreshing air of health in,the glow of her
cheek and the light of her eye. No wonder her
lord and master looks wonderingly at her and
says: II wish could keep cool and cheerful
as you do-what's your secretf'
Answering truly she should say: "Sleep."
So
THIS afternoon sleep deserves a chapter to
itself some other time. An expert practicer
promises me the fullest access to her expert
ence and knowledge of others habits.