The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1889-09-19
Everything IMP

Aest BNANSN Ia W ~ cAAS iva cEA0 IVA
one tomorrow. But to-night"-
"Now don't you worry, Dave" adj
vised Mrs. Pierce, briskly. ''I1l fix that
window. You know l am a woman of
expedients."
"Well, good-by, Miranda!'
He bobbed his sandy head and gave
her the brief, business like kiss which
expresses about as much affection as a
dig in the ribs.
"Good-by, Myrtlem
"Good-by, pal" said Myrtle.
She was ar angular child of IL, with a
pale, Ratchet face, a pair of round, wa
terry blue eyes, and an air of alert timid-
ity.
Sand now" said Mrs. Pierce, bristling
with ~expedients, 1--WE win see to that
window"
She was locking the door after her liege
lord.
'sHow, maj"
"Come and help!" was the terse and
indirect reply.
The house was frame dwelling which
stood in the meager grounds ALLOTTED to
the majority of even those city houses
which are not rigidly "blocked."
The kitchen window looked out on a
narrow strip of back yard, which ran
directly to the alley in the rear.
Mrs. Pierce lit the gas, revealing myr-
lads of water bugs scuttling around the
room.
sob, ma"
"Well?:"
She was exerting all her strength to
put down the perverse window.
"rm SO afraid of the bugs. Let's go
upstairs!"
'It's burglars, not bugs, you'll have to
be afraid of if we don't get this window
fixed" gasped Mrs. Pierce with grim en-
phasis, as she realized her efforts to PEI
suade the obdurate frame were futile, as
her husbands had been.
"Well have to go down stairs and
bring up a couple of washtubs," she
added.
Her particular ability was beginning
to exhibit itself.
When they had brought the tubs up
stairs and placed them before the win
dow they filed them from the kitchen
faucet.
Between them she placed a chair, and
thereon balanced frying pans, bread
pans, gem pans, jelly cake pans and pie
pans.
Then she produced a hammer, a string
and a couple of double pointed tacks.
The tacks she drove in lightly at each
side of the window casing and ran the
string through. One end of it she tied
to the handle q the dinner bell and this
other around the neck Of a bottle Of am
monia.
Directly in front of the sill she placed
a large mustard can, with the lid very
lightly laid on.
1t did not contain anything SO mild as
mustard, though. 1t was filed to the
brim with cayenne pepper--Natal cay
enne at that.
"Now," declared Mrs. Pierce, stepping
back to view the result of her labor, ''if
any burglar gets in there without Our
hearing him, it's q queer story. He's GER
tain to founder into the water, knock
down the tins, ring the bell, break the bot
tie of ammonia and get the red pepper
into his eyes into the bargain. And serve
him right, tool" in aggrieved anticipa-
ton of q possible intruder.
Myrtle's round eyes were rounder than
ever.
"Oh, ma, it's worse than dynamite,
amt it! Oh, ma, you're IN awful smart
woman! Amt you, mar
Miranda Pierce smiled the smile of ap-
preciated supremacy. But she only an
swered modestly:
81 have a genius for ~expedients,
Myrtle"
When, after having made a final re-
viewing round of the house they went
up stairs to bed, the spouse of David
Pierce produced a revolver, which she
tucked under her pillow.
''Now if we hear the crash in the
kitchen, Myrtle, I'll just open the VIM
dow, Ere off the revolver, and yell, 'Po-
licer
Myrtle shuddered r~everentially at such
a heroic resolution.
"Oh, ma, you're awful bravel" she
whispered, as she got into bed and COW
cred her head up tightly in the clothes.
The night wore on-a warm, moist,
dark August night. Mrs. Pierce, pro-
foundly confident of the success of her
barricade, should an entrance be at
tempted-or rather assured in such a
case she would be aroused, and brimful
of other equally clever expedients-went
placidly to sleep. But wide awake, half
~suffocated, shaking with terror. MYRTLE
powered by her side.
Elevenl
How could her mother sleep when
those terrible burglars might even now
be creeping up the back yards Another
hour Of agony dragged by.
Twelve!
There was the clink of o bell as it clat-
tered to the floor, an appalling rattle of
falling tins, and then a series of yells and
groans and howlS.
"Oh, ma!' quayered Myrtle. as a tre-
mendous sneeze from the floor below
terminated in a below of pain.
"It's the pepper getting in its work,
my dear!" explained Mrs. Pierce, as she
grabbed her weapon and sprang out Of
bed.
Across the room she rushed, flung up
the window, fired of the revolver as she
had resolved. and shouted. Police!