The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-04-18
BRIGHT BITS.

On THE HUNT-"But, doctor why didn't you
kill that sDipeY He came just right for you
But my dear fellow he few zig-zag, and |
had no sooner fired zig than he was gag. -
Fte9ende Batter.
''wHo was that young fellow here last night
Maria? 1t was after when he left"
He is one of the clerks at Fields, papa"
HE must have charge of the corset depart
ment-he's such a slayer. "-Chicago Herald
NOT so FUNNY.-Editor docking at joke
That's funny.
Contributor-Yes thought so.
Editor-I don't mean that. It's funny that
you should think such thing as that funny
Puck.
EXPLAINED.-Popinjay lin Boston for the first
time)--Whats that binding glare of light down
the street, Tin shop broke loose?
Blobson-Oh, no. That's only bevy OF BoS-
ton girls coming home from schools You see the
sun rejecting from their spectacles. -BurLing-
ton Free Press
CHANCE IN MUSICAL TAsTE.-Speeler-I see by
dose vashion notes dot dose ladies no longer
pipe and flute der gowns. Dot signervieS a de-
CLINE in musical taste. ain d it?
Deeler-No. Only change. Accordion skirts
are now in style.
Speeler-Vell Puck.
MERCHANTS WIFE suddenly appearing in her
husbands offlce)-Hah | thought you said your
typewriter girl was old maid?
Merchant (much cOnfuSed)-Um-er, yes. M
dear, of course. of course; but she is sick to-day
and she sent her little granddaughter as a sub
stltute. Philadelphia Record.
WIBBLE-Don't tell me that advertising
amounts to anything advertised three CON
Secutive days for an old woman to act as house
keeper and never got a single answer.
Wabble-lt was your own fault that you
didn't, You should have advertised for mid
dle-aged woman.-Terre Hdite Express.
MISS TRUAx Crying to win obdurate parents
consent)-But, father, Claude will make his
way in the world because he is honest. He
paid an outlawed note last week.
Old gentlemau-Paid an outlawed note! And
wants to marry your Never. My daughter
must marry business man.-St. Paul PIONEER
Press.
AT Miss de Snobbe's musical.
Smith, wonder what those two women over
there can be talking about. They haven't lis
tened to single bit of the music.
Muttonhedde--Shl They are two of the most
prominent society leaders and they are trying
to manufacture couple of grandfathers for the
centennial ball. -Truth. ss'
Now, remember" said the doctor, gravely,
you must have absolute rest and Quiee If you
do not, tell you plainly, will not answer for
the consequences"
Yes, DOCTOR" moaned the patient teeby
Il understand. And is there any particular
place in Philadelphia that you would recon-
mend?'-SomerUi!le Journal ~ y.
A GOOD. sHoT.-At a German target festival
the grand duke is requested to shoot at the tar
get to which he replies: Gentlemen. I'm
afraid if | shoot, I'll be laughed at as bad
shot.
Friend-Don't let that bother your royal
highness The marker has got his instructions
Hea knows what he has to do.-From the Ger
man, in TEXAS SiftinOs.
ALL RGGHT AS SENTIMENT Sunday School
Teacher Ito new pupil)-We are taught by the
Bible that when some one smites us on one
cheek we should turn the other to him Isn't
that beautiful sentiment?
Yes. ma'am."
Now, if an enemy were to smite you on one
cheek, what would you DOR
"rd pound the top of his head off"-Ne-
brdSkd State Journal.