The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1889-08-06
OF GENERAL INTEREST

"A man in Rothschild, Neb., dressed
himself in shroud and laid himself
carefully in coffin which he had pur-
chased. In this position he went to
sleep. When his friends discovered
him, some hours later, he was dead.
"A boy in Maine tried TO kill the
hired man by putting paris green in
the jug of cider. The man drank
every drop in the jug with ''hah."
of satisfaction, and observed that cider
seemed to be getting the Old-fashioned
twarg back.
In Il lately published story book
for boys the author has a boy thirteen
years old capture three burglars, save
four persons from drowning. discover
and put out fire, save a city from
inundation and find fifty thousand dol
lars in an alley.
At Adrian. Mich. lady saw an
engine-house with Il steeple, and inno-
Gently asked a gentleman attendant:
What church is that?" The gentle
man. after reading the sign, ''Deluge
No. 3" replied: Il guess it must be
the Third Baptist"
AT an old homestead near Grims-
by. Ont, there i Greening apple
tree one hundred years old, the
branches of which cover an area OF
forty feet, and which has frequently
yielded from seventeen to twenty bar
rels of marketable fruit.
In a number of tests applied to
masonry. according TO Prof. Baker, of
Illinois University, piers of ordinary
brick and common lime mortar stood
a pressure of little over / 800 pounds
per square inch, which is equal TO the
weight OF a column of brick 1000 feet
high, with ordinary Portland cement
mortar the strength was somewhat
more than $500 pounds per square
inch, or the weight of column of
brick masonry $500 feet high.
A German living in Weehawken
sent letter to the superintendent OF
Castle Garden Offering him 81 If he
would find a wife for him who would
come up to the specifications given in
the letter. He said: ''she must be a
rOsy-cheeked. golden-haired Dutch
girl, twenty years old. five feet tall,
weighing not over 125 pounds, plump.
and with waist tapering gently from
the head and feet She must be of
modest. retiring disposition and very
industrious"
A citizen of Carthage. Mo-. has in
his possession an original price list of
slaves. the property of JEFF Davis
brother before the war. The list en-
braces LOG names of both sexes, rang
ing from infants TO the aged patriarch.
Babies are quoted at 800. children of
twelve years at 5000. able-bodied wom-
en- $500, and thrifty farm hands at
sl,100. A man fifty years of age was
worth but 5000, while an old blind
woman was set down at zero. Hus-
band and wife are quoted separately.
The document is queer reading to the
present generation.
The story told of the German
maiden and the boss plumber who
spent their counting nights in inno-
cent slumber in their chairs. was par
alleled in my experience for one of the
young women in my list of sweet
hearts used TO tell me that her sister
had beau, farmer. who always fell
asleep soon after he had come to see
her. writes Julian Ralph in the Epoch.
He had done hard days work on the
farm, and she had been tiresomely
employed in the house. Neither one
had any thing to converse about, so.
when he fell asleep, she settled her
self for nap. and whichever one
woke first awakened the other. where
upon the young farmer babe the young
lady good night and went await
might be eleven o'clock or it might be
three o'clock in the morning.
Howard Chaffin, of New Holland,
o., whose domestic relations are not
OF the pieasantest, lately attempted to
brighten his wife by sending her the
following note: when you get this
you will be a widow. You will find
my body in the stable" Mrs. Chaffiu
received this startling news with con-
siderable nonchalance. and, it is al
legged, got out her husbands best
clothes and began to brush them for
the funeral. She sent her daughter to
the stable, who returned. saying he
was not dead. but looked lawful bad"
TO the stable, Mrs. Chaffin
found her husband suspended from the
rafter. In her efforts 10 release him
she discovered that he had passed the
cord under his arm, and that there
was not the slightest prospect of death
ensuing from strangulatiOn. Securing
a good, stout stick, she belabored him