The National tribune., 1889-07-25
WASHINGTON GOSSIP.
The Weeks DOingS at tie Ma
tiOIal Capital
AN AMERICAN COLONEL N STUTTGART.

lf there were not 40 many Ole eotaleFh Gun
pIoved In clerical positions in the War Depart
meut there would be no way Of accounting for
the amount OF Jolly deyilment that the clerks
in the Adiutant- Generals Office kick up. They
are az il an the time, and ! fully believe that
some OF the mad WRgs lie Rwske nights, when
they should be sleeping away the WEAKNESS
imposed by their labOrs, in studying up some
device by which they may make life uninter-
esting 10 brother clerks.
In the Division of the Adiutant Generals
Office that Is presided over by the erudite Kirk
leg Is a rotund and thoroughly jolly clerk
named Smith-ChArles Smith.
Charles. early in life, was born in Germany,
in the historic and aristocratic city Of Stuff
cart. he duly absorbed the German language,
which leaks out Of him yet at times, aud
fancy that like most boys of all generations
and ali lands he had hard time in amalga-
mating his ideas Of fun with his fathers idea
of strict propriety. il came 10 pass, finally,
that there was serious disagreement between
Charles and the elder Smith fancy they
call il Schmidt in Stuttgart-and Charles lit
out for the United States. arriving safe and
sound. and eluding the Castle Garden people.
In 1854 Smith Joined the 4th u. S. Art,
served in it for 10 years on coast and in
the field aud then put in two years in the 9Th
Art before be was discharged 10 be appointed
a general service clerk in the Adjutant- GEN
erals Office. This is all PREDATORY to the little
story have 10 tell and to show how good and
broad the joke is that is narrated below.
Smith had kept track someway of his family
at his old German home. and finally. about
four wears ago. decided upon trip abroad TO
visit the scenes of his boyhOOd days. lie took
his allowance Of leave and arranged for an ex-
tension, and sailed away 10 the Naterland.
There are mad wags about the Adjutant-
Generals Office, IS / have said. and they went
TO work at once. Taking large official en-
velOpe duly imprinted on the corner AS coming
a. H. A
erals Office on official business" they mailed
an Army Register for the current year. addressed
20 Brevet Col. Charles Smith, U. s. Army,
Stuttgart. Germany. care Z. ). Consul" An
other large envelope was filed with almsnscs
and Congressional reports, and another with a
formal letter Of transmittal with the annual
report OF the Acknowledgement OF Delaware on
the organized militia Of that State.
In Germany anything official is a matter
Of huge importance, and. as the military power
dominates they ascribe the same importance
20 like matters in other Nations. Stuttgart is
not a small town, but Smith was remembered
there aud vague rnmors had reached the people
that be was in the Adj utant- Generals Office
here. The addressed envelopes TO Brevet
Colonel Smith settled the thing. and when he
duly Notwithstanding nothing Of the job the
boys here had put mp or him-was surprised to
find q civic delegation waiting him, as well as
an Aid-de-Camp from the General officer CON-
Consul OF the United States was also on deck,
and Charlie was escorted to his home like a
dOuble-decker going into a home port with q
prize.
He couldn't understand the matter until he
got possession Of the accumulated mail, and
then be dropped 10 the joke. for be recognized
the various handEritiBgs on the envelopes he
explained the thing IN full TO the Consular
old soldier himself-who laughed, and told him
the matter had spread so widely, through the
chatter Of the Postmaster and his clerks that
he wOHld have 70 carry the thing through. De
couldn't make his old time tOwnspeople believe
ether than that be was a great military digni-
tary Of the United States.
Poor Smith protested right and left that he
bad no military record bnt was only 81 900
clerk in the Adjutant-Generals Office but that
only made matters worse, for such thing a
mar clerk getting salary Of $500 marks was
too absurd 10 swallow; aud, besides that was
about what Hussar Colonel was paid. He was
evidently they thought, under some special in
BfructioDs 10 observe the German service.
Stuttgart was the headquarters Of one Of the
modified army corps. aud while he was there
the annual operations Of the corps took place,
winding up with grand review.
Sol" Smith had been duly honored by an
Invitation to attend and witness the manuvers
and from natural feeling OF curiosity, had
mounted and witnessed most Of them. paying
special attention 10 the eyoiutions Of the field
artillery.
When the day came for the grand review,
the Northumberland commanding sent an
hld-ce-Lamp with q formal invitation 20 join
his stat for the occasion. Smith alphabetically
replied that be had no uniform with bin, nor
a military mount. The General sent back
word thai be would be glad 70 waive the for
nlziity Of uniform. and that mount would be
provided him.
On the morning Of the day set for the re-
view. hussar reported at "COln Smiths
home with magnificent led horse, and stated
that be was ordered for special duty as his Or
derry curing the day. Flies do not linger on
Smith. aud he accepted the situation, riding
with the staf, aud attracting attention by his
style of riding, which is distinctive with Ameri-
can troops
After THE troops had been dismissed from re-
view, the German officers crowded about Col
Smith. asking bis opinions Of what he saw and
iEFitiug comparisons with our own troops and
methods. Smith was cautious but being
pressed. finally told them: - To Your light
batteries. ggu have your traces too long for the
SWING aBd lead teams, and that il why the
hoIees are thrown 70 often iH making wheels
a. the gaiioP or going into battery" IL is an
Sctuai fact that this comment Of Smiths was
embodied Ia an Official report 10 The War Office
a. Berlin. aud tie traces we're shortened for
field work.
The boys In the Office here thought they were
having lois Of bald headed fun ia sending
those envelopes aud dead matter over 10 Smith,
but i strikes me tbat~be bulged out at the big
end Of the born especially as IL 50 impressed
his old father by bis official recognition abroad,
that when he died IN 1857, he left the genial
Charles fortune Of about 5000 marks and
fOrRave him al the tbrasbiBgs he had received
before be ran away 70 these United States
III ] were a DeHtschcr born, and was going
home for q visit, fancy that ] would like 10
have the Adjutant-6eneTal's boys put up Job
like that on me.
THE FRIGATE CONSTITUTION.
] am glad, as ] think every American must
be al Secretary Tracy 3 decisions announced
last 1eek-lo bring the grand aud historic old
ff1gate Constitution here 10 the Navy Yard 10
be the receiving SHIP.
There is nothing left Of the shin In which
Hull aHd bis cOBfrcreG fought their victoriesf u
the war Of 1872 but the ife-raiI around the
lnizzen aud a l0-foOt section of her keelson. bul
she Is the Constitution, and has a glorious bis.
tory Of victories won by hard Sighting. close
sbosrd, with ships that fully matched her.
When the war u the rebellion came she was
Obsolete for naval warfare but the best shin
built during that war other than the Euonitay
type was named after her old nickname -
tie New lr0nsdes. During, and for some years
before the late WaT, the good old frigate housed
the junior classes Of future flag officers at the
Naval Academy. and when. ia April, 1861. good
old Commodore Blake was the SUPERINTENDENT
81 Annapolis, his first request Of Gen. Butler
when that doughty chief arrived. was TO beIu
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