Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1889-06-07
FAT AND lie AN.
Characteristics OF Men with an
Excess or Lack of Flesh.

may be enamored OF some skeleton
liks young man that, as a rule. fat
NOV. besides being the most jolly and
conyivial of the male species, are also
apt To he the most considerable OF and
charitable TO others. Most fat men
are ever re dy To smile, nay, TO laugh
heartily. They usually possess happy
natures perhaps because as II class
they have good appetites and enjoy
what they eat They are more socia-
bic than their lean brethren-a fact
which properly explains why no one
ever heard OF "a lean mems clam bake.
After all is said that can be said
against them the fact still remains that
seven out OF ten fat men make excel
lent husbands.
Most unmarried ladies cherish as
their ideals men who are tall and can
not boast OF any unusual amount OF
adipose tissue They spurn the idea
of fat man for IA lifelong compan-
ion. and yet many marriages with fat
men and also with men who grow rap
idly or gradually stout after marriage
have turned out very we'll
A lady who has her home on Fifth
avenue, a widow, whose two husbands
repose side By side in Greenwood, re-
marked the other day to the writer:
"My first husband was OF the brunette
order, tall angular. sallow-facel,
saturnine, nervous-even TO irritability
at times and more or less of an in
valid during the latter part of his life.
No couple could have furnished Il
wider contrast in temperament than
ourselves. | am social by nature, fond
oil attending theaterS and OF sight-see-
ing, while he was a morbid recluse,
/ taking no interest whatever in the
! worlds e iyeties. | really believe If
/ no had had little more flesh on his
/ bones he would have been different.
not TO say "a happier man. Mind you
am casting no stones at his cherished
memory. My second husband belong
ed TO another genus. He was feet
2 inches in height and weighed 250
/ pounds. He was a pronounced blonde
and perfect picture of health. He
! took an interest in everything, though
not to the detriment OF his business. |
never had to ask him twice to 90 any
where with me. He was always eager
to participate in anything where mirth
and good time were promised. But
the poor man drank too much cham
payne and ate too many late suppers
and apopleXy carried him of.
A lady in Brooklyn on being asked
what physical style OF a man she pre-
ferred replied: The one | have suits
me very well. He is neither fat nor
lean. According 10 my ideas Of mas
culine physique ID is just right"
Another lady who vas present volun-
e., . 4.
band was too fat for his own comfort
and that when he moved he suggested
to her big piece OF animated Jelly.
Going up one flight OF stairs made him
puff like "a fire-engine, and he was
always complaining Of some pain. She
feared that he had fatty degeneration
OF the heart 1t seemed TO her that
his moral sense had grown blunter as
he acquired flesh, and in conclusion she
said that she did not have much admi-
ration for flabby fat men.
A popular clergyman. who weighs
over 2jO, on being asked his views re-
speeding fat men thus replied, with a
merry twinkle in his eve: There are
different kinds Of fat men. There is
the little, round. oily. fat man. There
is the digastric Fat man who owes his
extreme avoirdupois TO beer and high
! living. OF course / can not approve
OF him as "A fat man. Then there is
the man who gets abnormally fat be-
cause he is lazy and indolent. To me
such a man is an object for compass
sion. But for the man who is born
and stays fat or the man who gets fat
naturally as he natures | have the
/ highest respect, providing the man in
other ways is worthy
A lank. cadaverous-v isaged poet,
who is often seen walking along News
! paper row, was recently asked if he
would not enjoy life more keenly if
he were triile more corpulent NO"
he swiftly and disdainfully answered.
"corpulency BELTS aldermen, booders,
and saloon keepers. Though liter
airy man, | never indulge in malt.
which-to paraphrase from Emerson
is making our Western wits fat and
mean You will find that the major
ity OF intellectual people are not gross.
though many OF them are what might
be termed plump. Point me out ten
fat men and / will point you out nine
stupid men. Was Apollo coarse and
unctuous? Was the Greek conception
OF perfectly nodded body that of one
weighing 300 pounds? No. Art and
poetry ever have sought to imort,lize
such 1.-THE and willowy forms as that OF
Venus, such trim, athletic limbs as
those of Diana, such graceful symmetry
as that of Hebe. Really, / would rath-
er be snail than fat man."
Assuming. observed the poets
customer, that as n rule those not
fat are the most intellectual and
eminent in the world. how do you ac-
count for the fact that OF all the
people who obtain divorces only about
one-fourth are fat people?"
"Oh," returned tho poet, "you
might as we'll ask why there are not as
many fat people in the world as lean.
! am not married. but IL ever do take
a wife you may rest assured that she
will not be n woman OF such dimen-
sions as to attract offers from dime
museum managers"
Then the long-haired votary OF the
muse pursued his fanciful way toward
a l5-cent restaurant. Epoch.
oEiUhtinu Rob -