davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

1t was an ordinary scrap of wrapping pa
per, but il saved her life. She was in the
last stages of consuu ptlon, told by physi-
clans that she was incurable and could | We
only short time; she weighes less than
seventy pounds. On piece of wrapping
paper she read DIR Kings New Discovery
and got sample bottle; it helped her, she
bought large bottle, it helped her more
bought another and grew better fast con
unued its use, and is now strong, healthy
rosy, plump, weighing 40 pounds. For full
Ter particulars send stamp TO W. II. Cole
Druggist, Fort Smith. Trial bottles of this
Tonderful Discovery Free at J. NJ. Mixers
Drugstore. Enthusiastically
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

There is to be an oyster supper and .ocIt
dance Al the New hall Jan. ID -Ttavell :
!. bal. hat We are having snow storm NO"
vhirh W. hope will improve the roads some
what.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

I have had satarrh for twenty years. and
used all kinds Of remedies without relief.
M Smith, druggist, Of. Little Falls, recon-.
mentied El,S Cream Balm. The effects Of
the frst application vas msgicsl. ii allayed the
il nammAtion and the next morning my head
Was clear A. bell Ore bottle has done me
so much good that am convinced Its use
will effect permanent cure. Ii is soothing,
pleasant and easy TO apply, and strongly
urge its USE BY all saierers-Geo. Terry
Little Falls, n. Y.
Apply balm into each nostril.
ia. ssej&wlw
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08
+ KILN.
Nee ShotT,a

Ne1r ShaToa.
X q S~ lift ssve ~. this has been one Of
the best falls TO hin G &c he bought sheep
He has bu'chett. "a sent away ovr
twelve hundred It b. Ridley has been il
correspondence with different parties in re
relation to railroad for New Sharon. an
IL enthusiastic as to the need and feasibl,
ness of the plan.-The Gorden Bros. ar
operating in their apple barrel factory, bu
have not yet got things in perfect order
Albert Casrell is cutting large lot of whit
ash for VIM. Johnson 10 be used for shove
handles, delivered at f A. Beans mill vher
the logs viii be butted and save into square
C. A. Morrill, says he has sold over tifteel
tons of feed this fall, and this exclusivel
the amount sold at the mill by c. +
Cookson.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

Harmony-
Last Friday evening 6 NJ. Charles Dor
of Athens installed the officers-eiecf of Even
ing Star lodge OF Odd Fellows Of Harmony
as follows Lendall ChadbournO, N. Il.
W W. Brown, V. e.; Hosea Hurd, Rec
sec j. s. Hight. Treas. Shprb0n Leigh
tor, K s; Amos Brown, l.. s. Cha LEI
Wheeler, G. n , Frank X. Hurd, Chap -
At a quartsrl, meeting held AZ me churei
last sabbath Miss NAV flurd and Miss Ca {
die Iiuri we're the recipients of the oapti.
nal ordinance Hill Brothers at Mai1strean
bad a frame raised tor dry house To seaso'
thv inber for their buildings next summer
IL i. 80 feet long by ~ feet wide They
are running their stea n power Eight Al
day, saving out lumber tor the building
gong ON ih.rp. About twenty-five men Ar,
mployed
81 fi5Gns
As Mrs. Jesse GRAY was going out TO max,
M evening call she slipped on the ice au'
fell, breaking one bon of her leg below Il I
knee. 1t was painful accident and wi
contine her TO the house for some time.
The high water in Indian pond since
frozen over makes nice track for III
horsemen to exercise their trotter- and enj
the smooth .leighing, the roads being nearl
bare 10 many places The g X. Pos
Grange and Sons of Veterans have all elect
ed and installed their officers for the ensuin,
year and start the year 1889 with new zsa
add courage TO make their several organiza
ions better and more prosperous than in III
past
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08
One Of Many.

VICTOR, n. Y, Feb. let. 1897.
Mr.. o. F. Woodward, Dear Sir Send MT
gross kemp's Bal-am, soc size. and a few
samples. certainly know hat Kemps Bal
'sm is the best selling cough cure. havs
fifteen other cough and lung remedies on m,
'helves, and kemp's Balsam sells 10 to
pest of all Respectfully yours, F. z Cobb
sold by all druggists at soc and 81 Ssmpl,
lottle free. Jan3d&~4w3p
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

All who have experienced the depres sing
influence of catarrh upon the mind and
body, are willing TO bear personal testimony
. the merit and value of Takoma, the grea,
new medy for the cure of this agonizing
complaint 1t has done wonders for those
'ho had tried all other remedies wit tout re-
ewing any permanent relief, and were on
he verge of despair, jansi&w
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08
Marriages Of the Prince. Of Wales,

Five hundred years have elapsed since
England beheld the first marriage Of q
Prince Of Wales Indeed. there have only
been four such marriages in England, aud
one abroad The preliminaries of marriage
have o. ten been made, but these were in such
cases carried out after the princes accession
TO the throne. World
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

The best Sslve in the world for Cue
Bruises, Sores, Uicers. Salt Rhenm, Feve
Sores, letter, Chappej Hands. Chilhialns
Corns, and az Skin E-rptioss AID pes.., ],
cures Piles, or no pay required. I. IL qua,
anteed to give perfe Q; satisfaction. or more,
refunded. Price rs cents Per boz. For sal,
~ ]. NJ Mire- sng2nIda-lT
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

The recent statistics of the number OF
deaths show that the large majority die with
consumption. This disease may commence
with aa apparently harmless cough which car
be cured Instantly by kemp's Balsam for he
Throat ard Lungs, which is guaranteed tc
relieve and cure all cases. Price SOC and 81
Trial size free. Fo, sale by all druggists.
,JsHSrSw4w2p
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

Mrs. Muggins-It's raining, and Mrs Good
soul wants to go home, and have NO um-
oFella to land her e1sps my nsw $40 ous
Can't let her have yourss
Mr.. Mu2gins-Cracsy! Ths only unbrslls
I've - has her husbands name 60 IT, hAa-
dlA-PhiiAdeiphia Reenrd
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08
/. STATS spws


vet Httstoa-
Mr.. Charles Heath enters biz duties Mon
day Of this week. as bovk-keeper for the
Gardiner Beef Co.--Mr. W. Z. McCobo
rI7ed home frum Boston &sf Thursday.
he uili probably spend tie -inter here
Nothing taz- been done on the ice yet II Ia
,sot thick enough to cut yet, and there has
been 40 sIsos Of late to need serapinS--
Miss Eva featon sbe was injured qni,e bad
y by fall ng on the ice a short nuf sg'', Is
nsv son. . hat better.
Ltteh6eid-
Nelson ). Barbank Of Colby University,
sho ha. supplied the pulpit az the Baptist
church at South LitehneId fsr the past year
q. made the recipient Of useful preser'
rom fn~Dbers Of his congregation not
members Of the church, oa SUNDAY A
tie elpse Of the preaching service he vas m
.itrd TO the house Of the Dd, When he va
3re.entsd with fur collar and cuffs, AMI
money to the value Of sl5. Mr.. Burbank
caring that his bod ly strength -oad not
srmit him TO continue his pastorAte. and Al
the same TIM do justice 10 his college work 3,
elnetanfly decidsd ~ resign. l hi, preset
sas ial@nird a. a testimonial Of tbs ESTEEM
10 which he va, h-ld BY members Of the par
ish Geo Fowers. son of Nm l.. Powers,
'a'toSy ee~peu u'o - n.
~hlie '<A,ihe on 'ne - -.
.r"s'"e' "a "s
eonio NC fescaeu
bsekS Mus.
The ..i,ctmen of China, are 10 offer arr
sari Of hfty dollars for the arrest and con
,lction of the person Or persons ~ho brok
INTO the store of A b. Fletcher at Chin'
sillaye.-A couple Of uamps came near ~
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

I.IsCoiS
Al. a..

ANA
Rev +. Pentico.t who has been holdluR
revival meetings at the Centre has been pre-
.ent,d with a purse of go Many of III
lumbermen are keeping 'aVy teams an
aaxiously looking for snow.-tGpt- X.
Jones is to bedeck ais ght.r, put in stand
nv mast and new house rhP Al iert Kunh
let house has been moved upon the Iiiscocl
lot ON the new road. an will be- occupied b.
Leonard Croker.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

l, has stood the test of TIM. For more
than twenty years lngslls Throat ard Lug
Specific has been rscognir 4 as the besl
remedy tor Cr,up. Colds, Hoxrss ness and
kindred ailments. Try bottle.
iapSdSwlw
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

y No~ s ."f4 P4syss s"@i s stn Dys
They are e. positive cure for Dyspepsia, In
digestion, Flatu,ency and Constipation.
We guarantee them. % and 90 cents.
]. M. Mixer. 1874 W sta. ...-7l itu>r2a.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

Two very fine etched portraits u Gen
and Mrs. Harrison have just been ISSUED b,
NJ, r. Lyman, publisher of the Indianapo-
lis Herald Portraits on one plat, lsx22
elegantly printed. Agents wante, in every
Town in the country. Send % cents tor
sam ole portraits and terms 10 agents. Ad
iress NJ. X Hyman, Publisher, Indianapo
lis, Ind. d6tw2w
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08
Cs\A


castora is recommended by physicians for
children teething. 1t is purely vegetable
preparation. its ingredients are published
around each bottle. 1t is pleasant to the
taste and absolutely harmless 1t relieves
COZ stipation, regulates the bowels, auiets
pain, ures diarrh9a and wind collie allays
feyershness, destroys worms, and prevents
cons alsons sOothes the child and gives il
refreshing and natural sleep. Castoria is the
children's panaces-the mothers friend.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

A handsome complexion 10 one Of the
9 eAtsst charms . woman can possess. Pos
. .ni's Complexion Powder givesis
ia10dlv
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

The good old Vegetable Pulmonary Bal.aln.
Best known cure for Coughs, Colds & Consump
lion. Genuine Cutler Bros. s. Co. Boston.
oct2scodkv6m
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

WIN Baby w sick. vs esvs her csssor4a
vhsA che vas Child she cred for Cas.sr,a
WAss she became hiss, che chung 70 Cass~sa
Wha sAs AsA ChEazsa, shs gave them Co n
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

~ MN0Ns Ara ,.. I: h r. 70
Soother at hand. 1t is the only safe
medicine yet made that will remove all
infantie disorders- 1t contains no Opium
or Norphins. but gives the cl.ild noturI
ease Jrom pain. Price IS cents. Sold by
J. Nv % Wat tr4.i J-"vrjst
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08
NCr,x trile Wit. So. ~ oot OF
NNAS = ~. :. l..,zc

OSN Lug Dis>..sl. Il you have
a Cough or Cold, or the children are
threatened viii: Croupor Whooping Cough,
use Acker's English Remedy and prevent
further trouble. Ii is a positive cure
and We guarantee it. Price 10 and 50c
~. Mi~e- vas sV.er- .aqia,.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

ITO THE DEAF-A Person cured Of Deafnes.
i and noises in the head of q years standing BIZ
{ simple remedy. will send description Of 1t FRES
10 any Person who applies 20 NICHOLSON, III
NaeDeugall Street. New York. Y. 3. A.
ooct3d2tas&wiy
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

WE vGN3ON R Rny A EIin;1
Is warranted, is because it is the besa
Blood Preparation known. 1t will posi-
lively cure all Blood Diseases, purifes the
whole system, and thoroughly builds up the
constitution. Remember. we Guarantee it
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

Miss Marie Louise Paine, the expert banjo
ist, has returned from Europe. Miss Paine
Is young and wealthy New Yorker, who
has travelled extensively in Europe during
the summer on self imposed mission Of
Of r,a&ins the banjo popular in the old coun-
try. Miss Paine has not appeared in public,
but has picked her banjo in the homes u
some very arlstocratic people in Lon'l8n,
Paris. Vienna and RoIie Her creates tri-
umphs have been in Switzerland and in VEN
ice, where the entire population followed iier
Sondola on the Grand canal Miss Paale Is
the only daughter OF the well known pr U.
Spra Ne Paine. Of this city. Atlanta Con
A.,A:.-ls Aex YoEk Le:.e-
DtAur smoke That Kind.
Old Heavywaite-Confoun it, Jack, you'll
kill yourself smoking. I'm sure that is your
tenth cigar today.
Jock tfrom Yale,-rhirtesnth, governor
pue hooors
H2sywaits sserniyi-Horriblsi Look at
mel .svsr ameks more than rive agar .
Jnh-AstAar would III bad - sncfe
~ stexrs, sossucr-
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1889-01-08

1t was Christmas eve, and Goskin, accord
ing TO his custom, had decorated bis gambling
he'll with sprlss of mountain cedar and q
shrub whose crimson berries did not seem a
bad imitation Of English holly. The piano
vas covered with evergreens, and al, that
was wanting To Ill the cuo Of Gos.in's con-
teutment was n man to play that piano.
CHRISTMAS night, and no piano FOUNDER
ne said "rnis is u nice country for Chris
tan 10 live IN"
Getting piece of paper he scrawled tie
words:
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-08-14

that individual had no idea Of making y
sang phrase for name to his country ar
tne tlme. Jonathan 1rumbull, governor of
connecticut, furnished the struggling colo
MAI army with funds and supplies on many
an occasion. One time the army was in
sore distress and consultation was held
IN tne midst OF 1t some one wondered what
would be done. Washington answered:
" ell, Wen have to put il off till we can
see brother Jonatnan,n as GOV. Trumhull
was called, "he will help us out, | guess. -
ANA he did, and gave his name to the cOun-
Try MS zeal and patriotism helped To save
AN INVENTION OF PROF. TYXDALL
Thus it is that words are made and
phrases take on new meaning In this
manner the language progresses by accre-
ton, as 1t were. Such words as take new
meanings from custom are usually from
the common people; that is, from those who
are not scholarly. 1t is in this way shat
old words drop out or take new meanings
and lose their old ones and now words take
their place. At first most OF them arc slang
One of the best words we have is ''aCno,ti-
clsm," yet its inventor, Prof John Tyndall.
the great scientist, says that when he used
IL he had no idea it would be used again, or
that he would be understood in using It,
de could find no other. he says, TO convoy
an idea of his religious belief in answer to
the request of some churchmen thai he cell
what he did believe. Hence he invented
"agnosticism, meaning 1.-THE unknowa bic, "
IL is only about ID years old.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-08-14

The richest widow on the Pacific coast is
Mrs. Mark Hopkins, widow or one of the
Central Pacific syndicate. Her husband
estate proved up to $25, 000, 900, a"d the
only two men in California who could JUS
tify on the widows bond as executrix were
Leland Stanford and Charles Crocker They
were compelled to justify in twice the
amount of the estate, and each swOre that
he was worth SAC, 0O0,0JO. Mrs. Hopkins is
an elderly woman. The Hopkinses b d no
children but mad adopted son. whom Mrs.
Hopkins married to a Miss Crittenden, a
protege of hers, providing her with the dot
Of princess.
The richest young and unmarried woman
on the Pacific coast is said to be Miss Jen-
ME Flood, only daughter of the bonanza
king. The richest prospective heiress in
California is Miss Hattie Crocker, the only
daughter of Charles Crocker, another Of
the railroad syndicate. She also is. like
Miss Flood, rather plain in appearance =.
She is noted for her charities and domestic
virtues. The whole value of BILLY" O'Bri-
ems estate was a little over s., 600, 900. After
the legacies were paid the residue was
turned over to Mr.. O'Brien's two sisters
Mrs. Coleman and Mrs. Joseph Melon
oIgh. These two ladies Inherited $780,
900 each.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-08-14
The ORKNEY SPRINGS AND BATHS,

Shenandoah County, Va.
WILL continue to receive guests at regular
w rates until OCT 1st, 1899, thus enabling
their patrons to enjoy the grandeur and beauty
Of the mountains during September. Send for
circulars. +. w. EVANS, Manager.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-08-14

continue our SPECIAL SoUvE-
MIR SALE OF LADIES' SILK
GLOVES. During the entire
week the prices of Gloves
will be as follows:
Ladies Silk Gloves at 39c.;
were soc.
Ladies Silk Gloves at 49c.;
were 75c.
Ladies' Silk Gloves at 73c.;
were 81 and 81 rs.
Monday and Wednesday,
between 8 A. NJ. and 5 P. NJ,
we will present to every
purchaser of any of the
above goods a full-sized bot
tie Of Cologne.
We're Offering this week a
special line Of Gloria Silk
Umbrellas, with Gold Tipped
Handles, at 89c., 99c., 81 Is,
81 so, 81 rs, 81 80 and up
ward. They're we'll worth
inspecting.
In our Muslin Underwear
Department, on Second Floor,
some very desirable bargains
are to be found this week.
Among the many are:
so dozen Ladies' Muslin
Drawers reduced to 15c.
so dozen Ladies' Corset
Covers reduced to l5c.
so dozen Ladies Summer
Corsets reduced to 35c.
The bargain-seeking gen
tlemen will have things pretty
much their own way in Gents
Furnishing Department this
week.
We offer one case Gents
Brown Balbriggan Under
shirts at 25c.; SOC. is their
real value.
Here's another ! A SOC.
Undershirt. a real GRAY An
COLA, never before sold for
less than SOC, this week
down to Csc.
% dozen Gents Spanish
Mixture Shirts, regular price
Csc, down this week to 35c.
The greatest bargain Of all
in this department is 100
Suits Of Colored Balbriggan
Underwear, have been selling
at 81, now down to CSC.
The balance of our stock OF
Bathing Suits for Ladies,
Gents and Misses are marked
down to figures that mean 60!
Seen EN-.
Dress Goods that have been
selling at 75c. per yard are
this week down to 42c. The
lot embraces everything that
is new and stylish in Stripes,
Checks, Solids, all in the very
latest colorings-price 42c.
per yard.
In looking over our stock
of White and Colored Lawns
we find we have too many;
fact is we have now on hand
q much better assortment than
most houses have at opening
of the season. In order to
reduce stock will sell a SC.
Figured Lawn for &c., a 1Qc.
White Lawn for Sc, a 15c.
White and Colored Lawn for
l0c., a zoe. White and Col
ored Lawn for 12ac. The
higher grades in same pro.
portion. Lawns must go!
The busy housewife with
nimble fingers has a great
opportunity this week. We
offer l, 900 Stamped Splashers
at SC. each; are really worth
15c.
f. French's Improved Bay
Rum, large-sized bottle, 35c.;
sold by druggists at 75c.
1872 pair Ladies Beautiful
Hand-Sewed French Kid
Button Boots, with Patent
Leather Tips, a regular Sc
Shoe, this week down tc
So SO, in Opera Toe, B, G, D,
N mn
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1889-08-14
SUMMER RESORTS.
SUWANEE SULPHUR SPRINGS,
Suwanee County Florida.

Suwanee County, Florida
THE NEW SUMMER RESORT. situated in
L the high and dry section of the state,
one mile from Suwanee Station on the Sayan-
nah. Florida and Western railway, with horse
car to meet every train; no long drives In hacks
of ten or twelve miles; easy Of access to all
parts OF the state IL offers many induce
ments asa
SUMME Err r ESORT
not eqnaled by springs in the north. Free from
malaria and fogs; perfect system of water
works and drainage; not and cold water. direct
from the Springs, in every room, bath room 70
every cottage; steam launch and row boats on
tie river; billiard rooms, bowling alley; GRO
quet, lawn tennis, dancing and roller skating
pavillions for pleasure OF guests
AS A r. EM EDI y l. AGENT
it is well known for its wonderful cures Of Rheu-
matism, Dyspepsia, Diseases Of the Liver, Kid
neys, Blood and Skin. Resident Physician in
attendance.
Rates: $12:50 per week; special Inducements
offered TO families.
Excursion Tickets on sale from all points on
S. #. and W. railway, Brunswick and Western
railroad, Florida Central ana Peninsula, Jack
sonville Tampa and Key West and Florida
Southern systems. For further particulars, or
pamphlets containing testimonials, address
L. W. SCOVILLE, General Manager.
Suwanee Sulphur Springs Co.. Suwanee. Fla.
The morning news., 1889-03-29
BRIGHT BITS.

FIRST TRAMP-Buzz that old chap for dime
w rk upon mis- feelings
Second Tramp-Work upon his feelings chr
ANY work to be done, do it yourself. .-Aiu'aseyS
Weekly.
Miss UPPERoRUsr tout shopping)-what a
beautiful woman.
Mrs Uppercrust-Ye but she doesn't amount
TO anyth1ng-moves in some vulgar set or other.
just heard her ask the price Of a bonnet be-
fore trying it on Philadelphia Record.
A MIsER died a few days ago. After careful
investigation his trustees find he once gave
something away. In the giddy frivolity of his
early youth he gave the measles to his younger
brother This fact is to be la lded down to pos
terity in brass letters on his tombstone.-Tid
Bits.
WIPE Up-THE-GRouND (the Pawnee chief)-
The scalp of the white traitor shall grace the
wigwarn of the great red man
Petered Dick (the scout, under his breath)-
Leggo there, you barn-stormin' chumpi
You've got hold Of some of my real hair
Judge
TASTES DIFFER de Throp-I don't
think, Mr.. de Throp, that your sarcasm leveled
at our decollete ball dress is called for. You own
brother, the captain, ta&es much more liberal
view OF society matters.
Mr.. de Throp Undoubtedly. Capt Bob has
just returned from Samoa.-iHe Epoch
Too ETHEREAL FOR xPosURE.-Tramp-M Mad
anne, haven't you ANYTHING to give poor, hun
CRY. freezing gentle nan!
ing
Tramp-Thank you medame. Now couldn't
you give me something to wrap it up in?-
laakee Blade
VERY USKND-Scene: A new vo unteer corps
Shoe ting range Inftriated commanding Off
cef-Hi, there, get away, you madlaan-get
away from the target.
Easy minded Lunatic-Hold on. guy'nor, l
amt as mad as Hook, was here all day yes
terday, and found it muca the safest place in
the fielu.-L0R{On ErChunqe,
WIBBLE-What brings you down town so
early this morning, Wab5e?
Wabble-Im looking for a cook The last
one was color blind and We had to discharge
her
Wibble-What in the world has color blind
ness to do with cooking?
Wabble-A he4p. She brought a raw lobster
to the tabie.--Terre HGute Express.
SIZING UP TIE HorsE.--'H Have you a
DUMB waiter i1 the bouse:'1 asked the guest,
merely by way Of making talk while he waited
Tor his change.
We'll" replied the clerk, abstractedly put
ting the fiver in his vest pocket and taking the
change from the drawer. "Uhey han't any of
EN- got much sense, but when it comes to that
| reckon the landlord is the man you want; he
knows less than all the rest of the help put
together. .'-Brooklya Eagle.