The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1889-05-01
Mrs. BEAUCHAMP'S ESCAPE.
The Short Story Of An Engage
ment and q Portrait.

2ano naQ married MIN NOBODY cOulu
even make ont. He was such a thor
oughly uncomfortable person that even
his none could scarcely have been a
sufficient inducement to the most mer-
cenary girl in England to consent to pass
her life with him. Mr.. Beauchamp had
been in the habit of spending the greater
part of his time in the pleasing occupa-
ton of coquetting with one fashionable
physician after another, for, truth to tell,
he was a malade imaginaire. The doc
tors found Mr.. ~Beauchamp to be any
thing but a satisfactory patient, for so
fond was he of fresh woods and pastures
new that he had the playful habit of de-
sorting his medical advisers just rs they
had begun to flatter themselves that a
really full feathered fool had come into
their professional net. Then Beauchamp
would try quackery and doctor himself
with one well advertised nostrum after
another, so that the only wonder is that
he lived as long as he did.
Now, it was owing to the advice of Sir
CELSIUS Gorget that Mr.. Beauchamp came
to marry Mary Vane. Whew she came
out at the county ball in Loamshire he
took her down to supper, and half an
hour afterward proposed to her and was
accepted. Young ladies of IS years of
age have o habit of accepting their first
offer. A good many explanations, more
or less possible, have been given for it;
but the real reason, no doubt, is that the
charming young creatures honestly be-
lieve that they will never be lucky
enough to have a second offer, and that
therefore they will do well to make hay
while the sun shines.
Now Sir CELSIUS had said to Beau
champ as he pocketed that gentleman's
two guineas and bowed him out Of the
consulting room: ''Why don't you try
marriage? You seem to have tried every
thing else. Mind, I don't say / alto
gether recommend it-still / throw out
the suggestion; think it over"
Beauchamp did think it over. Indeed,
during the following week he pondered
on the great mans advice day and night;
and, just as he would have accepted any
other panacea, 70 he swallowed Sir
CELSIUS nostrum and married Mary Vane.
The nostrum can scarcely be said to have
been si~ngularly ~efficacious; for in less
that twelve months from the date of his
marriage he died, leaving Mary Beau
champ e3, 900 a year. She was a good
and kind wife to the unhappy man, and
l think that, after all, what killed him
was a too liberal allowance of some
body's electric pills and somebody else's
African elixir.
y y y =
Capt. Graham was a hero Of romance.
HIS had not a penny in the world, but he
had black curly hair, his teeth were per-
feet and his features admirable. More
over, Capt. Graham went to a good
tailor, and his boots were undeniable.
For various reasons the captain had ar
rived at a stage of existence when it
struck him as singularly advisable that
he should marry money. He went down
to Brighton and he put up at the Bed
ford. He used to walk up and down the
kings road and to stare out of the win
dows of the club like young lion seeking
whom he might devour. Of course he
came across a great many pretty faces,
but to his mind he saw nothing half SO
delicious as that charming young widow,
Mrs. Beauchamp; and as within o week
Of his arrival the young lady thought fit
to cast aside her weeds and blossom forth
in gentle violets and delicate mauves, he
became more than ever confirmed in his
opinion.
It is scarcely worth while going into
details as to the captains Vaccinations
in obtaining an introduction to young
Mrs. Beauchamp. Suffice it to say that
they were triumphantly successful. He
was to her as a revelation. He came, he
saw, he conquered. He proposed to her
n moonlight night upon the west pier.
Miss Jenkins, Mrs. Beauchamp's sheep
dog, was sitting within a yard of them;
but then Miss Jenkins was listening to
the soft strains of a selection from dor
othy," which was being played by the
band, and ''Queen of My Heart To
night" as a cornet solo, distracted her
attention from the subtler rendering of
the same theme which was being poured
into the young widows ear by the en-
amored captain. Mrs. Beauchamp list
ened with pleasure to his tale.
81 am a poor man, you know, Mary"
said he. 81 have little else but my good
name and my sword to offer you, and
hardly know if we should have enough
to live upon" He almost winked as he
said the words, but they conveyed a
noble idea of his own disinterestedness,
as he intended they should. 1--WE may
have to wait, Mary" he continued, "and
Imay even have to ask you to go to In
dia with me, for my regiment is IL of
the next for foreign service" Poor fell
low, he evidently had not the slightest
idea of the three thousand a year. 81
should not mind doing that for the
man I loved" said the widow softly.
And then he squeezed her hand, and
then she squeezed his, and then-and
then it was all settled in the most Dig
nifed manner, and Mrs. Beauchamp be-
came engaged to Capt. Graham.
Two days later Capt. Graham went
into one of the fashionable photographers
and sat for his likeness and ordered it to
be finished on porcelain in colors regard
less of expense. He did not in the leaet
demur at the five g~uineas which Mr..
Halftone's assistants said it would cost.
He only stipulated that it should be
..z1-.. fo.4- as~bA 1,o,,rs A f1a and