davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1889-10-19
PUN0ENT PARAGRAPHS.

MANY mon OF to-day are bald on
the inside of their heads. Idea"
-Browu-sI understand you 'olu
Well that l am regular chump.
Jones-"Nothing of the kind. sir. I'm
not round telling the public wnas
think. Omaha World.
-Shoddy Qoudly)-"fd have You
know, sir. that am self-made man
Letters docking him over intently)-
swell, MIR. Shod dy. you look ike III
YOU do. indeed. "-Lowell Citizen.
edison has no doubt got a good
thing in his monograph, but we can
name a dozen women off-hand who can
give it twenty-five minutes start ana
discount it without stop.-Detrois
Free Press.
-Hardupp-..Mrs. Cashey. love you
devotedly. Won't you become my pei
ter halfP' Mrs. Cashey-"l am AFRAID
Mr.. Hardupp, that you are not seeking
a better half SO much as better quar-
ters." -Terre Haute Express.
Visitor Ito couvict)-"What are
you in for. friendP" Convict-"big-
amy, sir; four wives" Visitor
Your life here must be sad" Con,
vict-.It isn't as sad as the life ied
before came here. Epoch.
-"Where is your brother now. Will
lamp" Hes in Italy, studying mu-
sic." "Is that SOP Well. as soon as
he returns send him around to my
store" "Whyp" Il can sell him a
hand organ at q bargain. "-Lincoiu
journal.
If there is any thing in this world
that will inspire woman with de-
termined desire to learn shorthand, 1t
is to find among her husbands papers
sheet full of mysterious wiggiy
marks, interspersed here and there
with the initials of the woman she
doesn't love. -Somerville Journal.
-'I'm saddest when / sing" she
said. when Henry came in and caught
her in the act of vocalization. Are
you?' he replied. smoothing the look
Of agony which ruflied his visage-
Darling. it shall be my constant en-
deavor to make your life cheerful
one. boston Transcript
MIR. Plaiutalk-''Have you trav-
eled much. Miss E!derly?" Miss Elder
ly-"Indeed l have. Every summer
since my sixteenth year dear papa has
taken me of for a trip abroad" lis
that so. Well, / don't suppose that
there is any country that you have moi
visited. Texas Siftings.
-Doctor-s.Your wife is in very
critical state, and should recommend
you to call in some specialist to consult
on the case" Husband-s'There you
see, doctor. was right again. told
my wife long ago she ought to get proper
medical advice; but she thought you
would be offended. London Punch.
Doctor politely, but looking at his
watch with visible impatience)-'Par-
don me. madam, but my time is not my
own. You have given me all your
symptoms in sufficient detail, and now,
perhaps you will kindly-er-ah--"
Husband (not SO cousiderate) Maria,
he doesn't want to hear your tongue
any more. He wants to look at it,
Chicago Tribune.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1889-10-19

1t is said that women are hardly
ever stammerers. They have so much
to say that they cant stop for it.-Bur-
lington Free Press.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1889-10-19

NO rules can be laid down that II
enable an inexperienced man to shear
sheep properly; and no such man
should be employed to do it. The
shearer should have experience and
he should shear with care. Any one
may accidentally cut sheep, but If
shearer repeatedly does it he ought to
be dismissed. There should be but one
cut made. This is very important. for
il there are two cuts the wool is ruined.
II you expect to get the best price for
your wool it must be put up in good
shape. You must pay for all careless
ness in putting up the wool. When the
animal is cut ia process OF shaaripg
apply tar p the wound
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1889-10-19

one OF the regulation color, ana the
effect produced by the separate layers
of red and white, which were perfectly
distinct, was very peculiar. A portion
of the scarlet snow was melted in a
vessel and the water evaporated, when
a fine, rose colored, earthly sediment
was found at the bottom, Snow of a
brick-red hue fell in Italy in 1916 and
in the Tyrol in 1847. In the first vol
ume of Kane's "Arctic Exploration"
it is stated that when the ship passed
the Crimson Cliffs of Sir John Ross"
the patches of red snow from which
they derive their name could be seen
at a distance of fully ten miles.
There is record of black snow in
Walpole, N. H.. but snow of this color
appears to be somewhat rare. There
is little mystery about these peculiar
snowstorms. however, since micro
scopic investigations have from time to
time proved them to be caused by
either portions of various minerals,
shells of infusoria, or parts OF plants or
insects. Infusorial shells and aquatic
plants of especial localities have been
identified after having crossed the
ocean and been deposited in dust
storms, thus tracing the course of the
aerial currents. Ehrenberg is said to
have found not less than $40 different
species of organisms in the dust of va
rious showers of which five were Of
marine origin. Humboldt and Lieu
tenant Maury have also treated largely
on this topic. The same general ex-
PLANTATION that accounts for these
showers applies also to the fall of liv-
ing organisms which have been previ-
ously mentioned. There seems to be
little doubt that winds, whirlwinds and
waterspouts are the chief cause of
these phenomena The several fish
showers that have been recorded
we're al preceded or accompanied by
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18
Increase of BAD Eyes.

Defective eyes are on the increase in spite
of all our hygienic teaching. The cause lies,
no doubt, in too much study of books in
early life and in badly lighted rooms. There
should be at least one square foot Of window
to every five square feet of floor in our school
rooms, and that the light should, if possible,
be allowed to enter from the south or east,
and prefers bly, from the south. The quantity
of light should at least be sufficient to enable
ordinary print to be read with ease in the
darkest corner of the room.
Then, in addition to this, youth should
have more out of door life to benefit the eyes.
The eyes are greatly strengthened by life
in the open air. At least the eyes of students
and those who live much indoors twice day
should be bathed in cold water and massaged
carefully. This is as useful for them for
eaISened D muscles Herald of Health.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18
SAD HISTORY OF A CAT.

You Will Recognize Him by the Tomato
Can Over His Head.
\ person who has evidently been driven in
sane through the midnight music of cats
sends the following communication to The ST.
Louis Repr bile: Ny tortoise shell cat was
presented to me five times; each time he re-
turned to the place of his birth, TO be thrown
into a willow basket and hustled back to me
He continued TO act in this way, receiving a
new name each time, until he was hardly pre-
sentable. The name which seemed to please
him best WITS that of Sardanapalus | called
him So not only because this oriental hero
has never had even disease named in honor
of him, but because early in life the cat
evinced Ii King for licking out the interior of
sardine cans.
In the course of time Sardanapalus devel-
oped into "A strong manly cat, with a full
blown nose. He mixed great deal in soci-
ety, chiefly at night, As soon as any one
was stirring in the morning he would enter
the study and curl up on the unabridged die
tionary 10 take his days rest. Managing by
strict economy 10 make both ends meet, here
he would lie, growing and striking out vi
ciously whenever | wiped my pen on him or
wished TO ransack Webster for the missing
''e'' in judg nent.
But, alas, the morning of the l4th brought
not my Sardanapalus TO me- After mo
ments search We discovered him in a vacant
lot near by endeavoring 10 free himself from
an empty corn can, which, as he was exploF-
ing its dep hs had caught firmly in the fur
behind his ears. The can had been opened
only at one end, but hole had been punched
III the other end, So that Sardanapalus could
breathe easily and view the surrounding land
scape to a limited extent | approached eau
ttously TO Remove his sunbonnet, but the in
stant | lail nay hand tenderly upon him he
shot down the street and was gone like a
streak of good luck, knocking as he went two
baby carria yes off the track and leaving his
pursuers fa- in the rear.
| went t. the nearest drug store to tele-
phone TO al my friends living in the direc
tion in which he had started out. | asked
them to get halter and try to stop him; or
If that was not possible, to head him off
But none of them succeeded and we never
heard of him again.
We listen in vain for the catlike tread OF
his cushioned feet Will never again craw
out of bed, tearing the azure robe of night OF
"a rocking chair and sweep Sardanapalus and
his little band of followers off the back porch
He left not ming by which to be remembered
except a few locks of his hair, which subse
quently plucked from the rose bush, and the
impression Of his delicate form in the lettuce
bod
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18
A Sare lnyestment.

Is one which is guaranteed TO bring
you satisfactory results. or in case of fail
ure return of purchase price. On this
safe plan you can buy from our sdver-
tise druggist bottle of DR.. Kings New
Discovery for consumption. 1t is guar
snteed to bring relief in every case. when
used for any affection of throat. lungs or
chest, such as consumption, inflamma-
ton of lungs, bronchitis, asth ma, whoop-
ing cough. Group etc, etc. 1t is pleas
ant and agreeable to taste, perfectly safe,
and can always be depended upon. Trial
bottles free at Hartz s. Bahnsens drug
store.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18
MERIT WIN {.

We desire to say TO our citizens, that
for years we have been selling DR.. Kings
New Discovery for consumption, DR..
Kings New Life Pills, Bucklen's Arnica
Salve and Electric Bitters, and have
never handled remedies that sell as we'll,
or that have given such universal satis'
faction. We do not hesitate to guaran,
tee them every time, and we stand ready
to refund the purchase price, if satisfac-
tory results do not follow their use
These remedies have won their great
popularity purely on their merits. Hart7
& Bahnsen, druggists.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18
THE BRIDES LETTER.

Dear Helon you will be surprised
To get & note so soon-the first
Bridal ed ton, unrevised-
And scribbled at my very worst.
I've but pencil, you see
leaf from Harrys diary torn,
And then I'm writing on my knee
And feel a little bit forlorn
We're ON the train still. I'm alsne,
Harry is in the smoking car
These las two hours. My times my own;
But, Helen, dear, how strange men arei
Three days ago-time quickly flies
And yel it somehow seems like years
Since all he kisses and good-bys,
And all the trembling hopes and fears
OF course, he likes TO smoke, but then
You always used 10 say, you know
Women we're different from men.
All, yes, indeed l find it so.
Most of my dreams seem disarranged;
OF course TN happy-only life
Looks alt cred now-the world is changed;
can't believe I'm Harry's wife
And yet know | am, for here
(What tiny thorns ones wreath may marD
I'm sitting quite alone, my dear,
And he-is in the smoking car.
Madeline s. Bridges in Judge,
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18
Paths of Tornadoes.

Professor j. P. Finlay gives the width OF
the path of destruction in tornadoes, as deter
mined from the records of eighty eight years
at from 10 to 10, $50 feet the average being
1869 feet. The length o the tornado track
varies from 800 yards to about 200 miles, the
average being 24 70 miles. The velocity OF
progression of the tornado cloud varies from
Z to 100 miles an hour, the average being
a. IL miles These extremes may often occur
In different portions of the track of a single
tornado. The shortest ime occupied by the
tornado cloud i'll passing a given point varie:
from ian instant" to about twenty minutes
the average being seventy-four seconds
NcN York Telegram.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18
ErgS Galore.

A curious feature of the National museum
at Washington Is the geological section, or
the depart nent devoted to birds eggs. 1t
has about 1000 birds eggs, packed away in
little trays placed in cases along the walls of
the building The eggs in the collection vary
in size from that of the tiniest humming bird
to that of he giant bird whose remains are
found in Madagascar. There is a little egg of
a tiny hunlming bird lying in diminutive
nest The humming bird that made the nest
and laid the egg is the smallest bird in the
world. The little egg has a length or long
diameter OF 3-l0ths of an inch and a short
diameter OF 3-lOOths of an inch. The nest is
l-2Oth of an inch across one way and 92-10O
the other.-Boston Budget
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18
Rust Proof Paper.

The improved manufacture of rust proof
paper, for wrapping metallic articles liable
to become tarnished, consists in Incorporating
with the Iaper or applying to its surface a
fine metallic powder in such a manner that
it will adhere BY this means, when silver,
copper, brass or iron articles are wrapped in
the paper they are preserved from rusting or
furnishing by reason of le greater affinity of
the zinc for sulphuretted hydrogen, chloride
or acid gases OF vapors, ld preventing them
from injuing articles of such materials. -
Chicago Times.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18

CHEEKY Words

From gentleman of Texas to his own
people. and all others over the country
Hear what he says:
haye been a practical druggist in
| Tyler for a number of years, and in that
| time have had occasion to examine. try,
and notice the effect of nearly all the
highly recommended preparations or pat
| ent medicines on the market, and as
have suffered untold misery myself, the
past number of years, from severe form
of inflammatory rheumatism, and could
| find nothing to cure or relieve me, had
almost drawn a conclusion that all pat
| ent medicines were more or less frauds
until about one year ago. | was in
duced by friend now living in Tyler. to
try 3 preparation known as B, or Bo.
tanIc Blood Balm. and after a long per-
suasion on his part. l finally made up
my mind to make one more effort to rid
myself of the terrible afflicton; and it
now affords me the greatest pleasure of
my life to state to the citizens of Smith
county that am entirely cured. with no
traces of the disease left, and all effected
| by the magic healing properties of b. b.
| B., which consider the grandest, purest
and most powerful blood remedy known
TO man. | have been subject to ins
fiammatory attacks since ten years of
age. and up to the present time have had
four. The last spell came on me in
J November, 1885, over year
ago. at which time | was
confined to my bed for eight weeks, pass
ing the nights In misery, with no sleep
except when produced by narcotics and
various opiates The week previous to
using B. B. B. upte that time had only
eaten six meals, and could scarlely sit up
without support; but after using three
bottles was able to relish my meals and
to walk up town, and after six bottles
had been used, thank heaven, | was en-
tirelY cured, and not the slightest pain
felt since that time. When returned to
business in February, my weight was 145
pounds, but gradually increased until my
regular weight was again attained, 210
pounds. The noticeable fact in what
have so cheerfully stated is, that this un-
paralleled and remarkable discovery, B.
B. B. . cured me in mid winter, at the
very time my sufferings and misery were
the greatest. | take it on myself as d
practical druggist to heartily. cbeerfully,
as well as cOnscienuonsly, recommend
this glorious blood remedy to all sufferers
| of rheumatism or blood troubles, and not
only myself, but the firm of Mckay &
Adams, who handle it, will cheerfully in
dorse its superior merits.
| IouN NJ nsvIS
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18
CHICAGO, MILWAUKEE & ST. PAUL.
ZsMsz1so
MzW4UKEE
4w Sz14UZ I

FAST MAIL TRAIN with Vestibuled trains be-
tween Chicago, Milwaukee, st. Paul and Mime
apois.
IRA NS-CONTINr NTAL ROUTE between Chi
cago, Councli Bluffs, Omaha and the Pacific
Coast.
GREAT NATIONAL ROUTE between Chicago
Kansas City and St Joseph, Mo.
500 MILES OF ROAD reaching all principal
POINTS in Illinois, Wisconsin, Minnesota, Iowa,
Missouri and Dakota
For maps. time tables rates of passage and
freight, etc, apply to the nearest station agent
of the Chicago. Milwaukee Il ST. Paul Railway, OF
to any railroad agent anywhere in the world.
ROSWELL MILLER, A V. II. CARPENTER,
General Manager. Gen'l Pase Il T. Agt
For information in reference to Lands and
Towns owned by by the Chicago. Milwaukee 4
st Paul Railway Company. write TO H. a. Han.
gen, Land commissioner Milwaukee Wisconsin
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18

In the pursuit of the good things Of
his world we anticipate too much; we
eat out the heart and sweetness Of world
ly pleasures by delightful forethought of
them. The results obtained from the use
of DR.. Jones Red Glover Tonic far exceed
all claims. 1t cures dyspepsia, and all
stomach, liver, kidney and bladder
troubles. 1t is perfect tonic, appetizer,
blood purifier, sure cure for ague and
malsrial diseases. Price, so cents, OF
druggists.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18
100 Ladies Wanted,

And 100 men to call on any druggist for
a free trial package of Lanes Family
Medicine, the great root and herb reme>
dy. discovered by DIR. Silas Lane, while in
the Rocky mountains. For diseases of
the blood, liver and kidneys it is posi-
tive cure. For constipation and clearing
up the complexion it does wonders.
Children like it. Everyone praises it,
Large size package, so cents. At all
druggists
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18
BUCKLEN's ARNICA sALVE

The best sslve in the world for cuts,
bruises, sores. ulcers, salt rheum. fever
sores, letter, chapped hands, chilblains,
corns and all skin eruptions, and posi-
lively cures piles, or no pay required. II
is guaranteed to give perfect satisfaction
or money refunded. Price 25 cents per
box. For sale bv Hartz & Bahnsen.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18
Vlgor and Vitality

Are quickly given to every part of the
body by Hoods Sarsaparilla. That tired
feeling is entirely overcome. The blood
is purified, enriched. and vitslized, and
carries health instead of disease to every
organ. The stomach is toned and
strengthened. the appetite restored. The
kidneys and liver are reused and invig-
GRATED. The brain is refreshed, the mind
made clear and ready for work. Try it.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18

Another new style of clam has been in
vented in Maine. 1t is the lunch clam" is
put up by packing company at Deer Isle
and is said to be the most delicious thing in
tin cans, not excepting the Eastport sardine
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18

o. F. Williams, of Patillo, Ga, has
found snake fifteen inches long and no
bigger around than a knitting needle. 1t
seems to be variety of water serpent.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18

Gadby. whose father was a circus
tumbler, now goes about boasting that
he is one of the sons of revolutionary
sires.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18

The new powder for Russian small
arms gives greatly increased velocity owe
that formerly in use.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18

Smallpox is said to be raging among
the Okansgon Indians on the Pacific
coast.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1889-07-18
JOHN NJ. DAvl

and MCKAY & ADAMS, Tyler, Texas.
Send for our book of wonders, free.
1t treats of all blood disorders. Ad>
dress, BLOOD BALM Co. Atlanta, Ga.
, 1889-08-10
PrOkIarna.

ALLIE og Enhver, som MATTE have
n Noget at fordre paa Beet efter
afgangne Enkefru MARGRETE
DIDRICHSEN, indkaldes herved
til at anmelde og bevisliggj0re deres
Krav for undertegnede Skifteret in.
den Udlobet af 3 Maaneder efter
denne Indkaldelses sidste Bekiendt-
gjorelse. .
,Ligeledes indkaldes med Aar Og
Days Varsel den Afd0des Arvinger
for at legitimere deres Arveret og
iagttage' deres Tarv paa Boet.
Frederiksteds Skifteret st. Croix, den
2den August 1889.
= 'a.'''''.i a' r. PETERSEN.
, 1889-08-10
Translation.
Publication.

T is hereby made known that
Lawyer ?. LEMMING, acting
Collector of CuStomsat Christiansted,
has resigned his post as upper guar
dian, and that Government has ap-
pointed Lawyer T. BRUN ia his
place.
Government Secretary'S Office, ST. Croix
the LIST August 1889.
LIMPRICHT.
, 1889-08-10
acknowledgements

nET bekendtSjores herved, at
~ Overretsprocurator est, Toldfor-
Walter i Christiansted ? .LEMMING
efter Assigning Ell fritaget for Ever
vet som Overformynder, og at Gou-
%yernement har beskikket Oyerrets-
pr0veprocurator T. BRUN / hans
Sted.
Gouvernements SccIetariatet, st. Croix
den 1ste August 1889.
LIMPRICHT.
, 1889-08-10
BARN | PENSION

$pN
90 af SOR0 6nsker i Pension en-
lille Pige i IL Aars Alderen til at
opdrages og undervises sammen med
hendes egen Datter i den Alder.
HOnorar TOO Kroner aarlig. Refec-
terende bedes tilskrive,
FRU LAKJER,
Alstedllle,
Sor0,
DANMARK.