The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1889-09-12
WISE AND OrHERMIsEl

Flies everywhere. Even time flies.
Out on fy-The dove when it left
the ark, .,'irf ..Ir I... r-.'If
Beecham's Pills act like magic ON
weak stomach. a G'.a -Ilf 500
A poker party-The locomotive fire
man. Boston Commercial Bulletin.
"A quiet wedding-The marriage of a
couple Of deaf putes.-Boston Budget.
We hear of countryman having sold
plot toia novelist for $1,000 Il must
have been a grass plot Munsey's Week
lg, s4-siT,.lr ~, - -
SWELL" said Right Field, as he took
MS overcoat to the pawnbrokers, "here
goes for three balls and;a bat l'- Yale
Record, vs. .Ff .sr.,I IN 49,. -;
The papers state that there is scarcity
OF eggs at Chautauqua. The lectures
must have been worse than usual.-4OHl
City Blizzard. !, .,,'. 17l'F' 10 f.t7 .
'STbis applause is sothewhat oyerdone y
as the lecturer remarked when an aged
egg took HIM between the eyes.-Pitts-
burg Chronicle. q. -
Young Manu- have here something
Tor the poet'scernehf Editor-All right,
young man the poet sSslgrfef sits right
over there.-Judge. w. Fiteg AS.. a %.
a litefary1ady OF Boston was cheated
in The purchase Of some calico. And
now let her Shakspearean motto, put
Hdtchet. t''. ia '' '.ait -'' .'i -
A Kansas girl gets even with her re-
creant lover by suing him for breach Of
promise and setting her claim for dam
ages at $500. She intimates that he is
very cheap. IL,
Charlie (whothas been blowing the cor
net for an hour%4Say Ned. do YOU think
there is any music in me Ned-"I don't
know, there ought TO be, | didn't hear
ANY come out Time. sa. -a- st7
4 "Willie's like piece of flannel" said
Tommy. as he watched HE small brother
cuddled up in the bath tub. "Why do
you say that, Tommy p Because he
fshrinks when'he is washed"
When a young lady begins to manifest
an interest in the arrangement of young
mans cravat his bachelor days are num-
lbered. 1t Is time to begin to hoard
money philadelphia Press. ..s' {
Some sort of "elexir". is wanted to I'm
part age and experience to the verdant
youths and maidens who think they can
/, tmarry and keep house on six dollars per
week.-ShOe and Leather Reporter.
|, II have met this man," said a great
lawyer the other day, "in a great many
places where would be ashamed to be
, Iseen." And for minute he couldn't
} understan why verybody laughed 81
uproariously. s..... ,......-.
Hyou could see your own scalp through
e an ordinary magnifyiDg glass, you would
7 be amaz'd at the amount OF dust, dand
i. ruff and dead skin thereon accumulated
p The best and most popular preparation
= for cleansing the scalp is Aver Hail
Vigor. ~ .i.. b
THAT was a serious accident" re-
! marked Mrs. B4wnso, looking up. from
: the paper, Policeman McNab attacked
i by furious steer and thrown into thu
air" Not very serious, replied Biwn
so; lit was merely the toss of copper.
Puck.
|, We have a speedy and positive cur
for Catarrh, Diphtheria, Canker' MOutl
and Headache. in SHILOH'S CATARRE
y REMEDY. A nasal injector free viii
" each bottle. Use it If You desire healtl
and sweet breath. Price so cents Solt
by j. L. Shurtleff, @ 3Gs AZ 2 "a
These are the days when a man with
t culver full of daughters and a dwifd
ling bank account is justitiedindecfyinL
the expensive summer resort add Sc und
: ing the Klofiesof the quiet farm sh6us,
e retreat where MARIA and passed ou
! honeymoon York Graphics'3
/. The mountain towers toward theioToud (
y The ocean oars like thunder, III 4 Ii
+ But when woman's scoldinR loud 81
She fills mans soul with wonder
lis then he feels how weak he am, ~
How small and weak he be-; - .
His voice is but aAOllow sham, 81 G
nI When he contends with she. 4 ~
. L A lnnrr,nl L.. nc