The McCook tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 1886-1936, 1889-03-22
A Man Of Muscle Has FUN With His
G~ripsacks:


Not long ago a drummer for a st
Louis hardware house started out
lie was a giant in strength. He had
Two strong grips Tor handbags
made, and in them he put iron sam
pies weighing about 1876 pounds in
each. He would alight from a train
with his two innocent-looking grips,
md the hotel porter would make a
rush for him.
Right this way for the Hardcase
House. Carry the grips up to the
hotel, boss?"
"Yes," Smith would say this name
was Smith. He would and the two
grips to that porter, and let go as
soon as he saw the unsuspecting vic
tim had hold of them. Then there
would be a wild flourish of feet, "a
loud crash, and the porter would go
down as though he had been shot.
"What in thunder are you throw
ing my grips around in that manner
for?" Smith would yell as if mad.
The porter would jump up, think
ing he had stumbled, apologize and
make a grab at the grips. Then he
would pull away. and his eyes would
loll out, and he would strain until his
suspender straps would break, and
he then would say: ''B-b-boss! what
are these things? can't lift 'em!"
Smith would take hold of them
lightly, gently lift them up, and say:
I"Oh, if you don't want to carry
them III go to the other hotel"
Then calling the other porter he
would give them to- him. Of course
the other fellow would take hold of
them with a smile and firm grip,
only to go down on the platform in
defeat with a thump! Then he would
rise, look at the grip, gaze at Smith
awhile, then leave muttering some
thing about voodooism- Smith
would then throw themint@ awagon
and go up to a hotel.
At the door he wouldcall bellboy,
and as he pushed his way through
the crowd he would hand them to
the poor, overworked boy, and the
crowd would be astonished to see
him go down with those grips the
fall making a noise that soundedlike
a freight train wreck, and shook the
house. Smith would pick them up
himself, and remark to the landlord
that it was a shame to overwork his
help I'm any such manner, and he
would then walk toward the register,
and the landlord would rush UP to
him and say,
"Why, them boys are lazy. Here,
give me your grip, sir" and he'would
take them.
OF course, Smiths remarks at
tracted all eyes, and as the landlord.
got a. good hold ofthe handles, Smith
would let go suddenly. The specta-
tors; would be astonished to'see' the
landlords back suddenly humpitseIf
like a cat on a back fence, his eyes
bulge. out out like marbles on mud
wall, and then see him fall full length
between those grip with a crash that
brought people out across the way.
He would get up slowly. rub hisback,
walk around the grips and then GO
and, swear, as Smith would, take
them up and put them on the count !
err.
Them the fun would Begin. The
clerk grabbed one of them to, set it
off the counter, and itwouldnitmoN
He looked astonished, and then spit
on his hands and tried to lift it,. as
his face turned red and knots swelled
upon his forehead. But that grip
wouldn't move. Then all .the'crowG
would try their hand, and finally all
swear it, was some trick. Smith
would then lift it off gently, an&
asked them what allied them. This
would make the crowd feel his arms, !
and they found outthey had muscles
like coeoanuts for size and rocks for |
hardness. Then it dawnedion them
that Smith had heavy. grips fer q
sell, and they were correct.
That was the way Smith adver-
tised his house, and it; vas "a success,
tooa-Chicago Herald.