Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1889-09-08
DER or scared to death in my cell, and then
given life sentence? / trust not

gen ,arme took me politely as one woulC
take the arm of lady vino has threatened
70 be sister to him. In New York, tht
nrst time that I was arrested, if am no
mistaken, the policeman took me by the
rear of the coat collar and by dexterou'
twist of the wrist, asphyxiated me in few
moments SO that I could see the heavens
roll together like scroll. lost conscious.
ness for little while and all was blank
Ii had not accidentally caught revivine
Whit OF the policeman's breath, guess
would not have been resuscitated at all.
The Partisan policeman, L must say, is
inferior in his general appearance. So is
the average French soldier. ! used to won
der how France could maintain large
army while she was SO poor and in debt, but
see 1t all now. She saves many millions
OF francs each yearly making the tails OF
tne coats Of the military shorter as times get
harder, and also shortening the waists OF
the same. 1t has got SO now that the two
coattail buttons and the collar button be-
hind are almost in row. Added to that.
the French soldier is getting smaller every
year. If I had to fight in q real war /
would rather be attacked, / think, by a
French soldier in short tail coat and wide,
red, cotton trousers than by any other ad-
versary can think OF. They are not the
Kind of soldiers who sustained the remark
| able supremacy of the Emperor.
The French policeman wears navy blue
| coat that fits him in a rambling and desul-
tory way. He also wears linen trousers
which should have tatting around the bor-
ders, but the Republic is at present in such
chaotic and turbulent state that it is al
most impossible to get the tatting appro-
priation through. These white linen trus-
ers costing, we will say, two francs t. o. b.,
that is to say 40 cents Tree ON board the cars,
are the sole covering of the Paris police
mans legs. Hence, he always has the air
of boy who has recently been recently
chastised. He carries, as I say, short
sword or iron stab knife, which adds some
dignity to his otherwise apologetic appear
ance.
NYE GETTING EVEN.
Some will say that I am severe to the
French police, but reply, not so severe as
he has been on me. What right has an Off
Ger to arrest me in a language which 1 do
not pretend to understand and herald my
name all through Europe without paying
the slightest attention to the remarks which
l made in the purest English of which
was master? I say and say it also in stem
torlan tones, that no country except Amer
lea can hope to be great which makes up
her entire police force of foreigners.
In Ireland the police are also foreigners,
but they speak very good English. was
not arrested in Ireland. bought sprig
of shamrock, however. and brought it home
In little flower pot. I sat up nights to
keep it alive and watered it with my tears
while i'll on the ocean. But thank heaven
it pulled through at last and is alive and
growing on my country seat.
But it is not Shamrock.
1t is clover.
And mighty poor clover at thatl
1t the Irish relief fund is not so large this
year as usual, the public will understand
why IL is thus.
Our jaunting car driver was an Irishman.
BE was an extremely entertaining one also.
Very polite and good singer. He had the
stars and stripes tied to his whip and so he
had good many American dollars at the
end of the year which he puts into pounds,
shillings and pence. He told me all about
ireland SO that know more about the mat
ter than ever did before, I believe.
Then tried to get even by telling him
about our glorious country. I spoke OF the
marvellous growth and wealth of the Repub-
lie, also of our cordiality toward foreigners
who desired to come here and vote orr way
as soon as possible.
SOME OF OUR BEST.
Then told him about the great agri-
cultural resources of our country and the
mighty cyclone of the West which is able to
pull an artisan well wrong side out like the
finger of glove and leave it sticking 900
feet up into space like sore thumb. 1
then spoke briefly but feelingly of the Far
West; the gold and silver and canned
goods, wild animals and desperadoes, the
high mountains. the wealth of timber, the
rarity of the atmosphere, which enables one
to easily see across an entire State and
which makes the bore of an ordinary re-
these told him about, as we rode gaily |
along in our russet colored jaunting car |
with Maud S doing the pulling.
Maud is bay mare of about middle |
age with green grass style of embonpoint, |
as we say in France, which prevents her at
tanning a great velocity without training
down good deal.
After had told the driver all could
think of, he yawned little, thought, and
said, "Yes, l am always interested in Amer
ic&y and shall be all my loif, for lived in
Montany, eight years mesilfp'
then spoke of tine scenery through which
we were passing. George W. Floyd bought
a small flask of Irish whisky while we were
on the old sod. I drank some of it on the
way over here. now see why Ireland feels
that she has been grievously wronged. That
is exactly the way felt.
We also bought several shillalahs, some
times called the original Home. They are
made of black thorn with a protuberance on
top, out OF the root of the thorn. This mob
rebounds from the head with great elias
ticity so as to give several blows with only
one propulsion, so to speak. This COM
bined with the popular beverage, seems to
ofer the best facilities in Ireland for spir-
ted and earnest controversies over anything
which may present itself.
MORE HOPEFUL THAN EVER.
But seriously, the Emerald Isle seems to
De more hopeful of peace and prosperity
han for many years past, according to the
authority of the best read Irishmen, and es-
9ecially of the clergy, among them the Rev.
)ames Hegarty, who was fellow passenger
ind who talked very cheerfully of the Irish
mutation at present, feeling, as he said, that
t must certainly very soon, and without
erlous disturbance, adjust itself to the sat.
sfaction of every one with the exception of
hose, perhaps, whose opinion is not valua-
,le.
Next to the policeman, the railway guard
II the. old country interests me. Having
,een accustomed to the clear, resonant and
iocutionary elevated railway guard and his
right, crisp remarks about the stations as
We pass along. I was i'll prepared to be fast
ned into a railway carriage by myself, with
10 conductor to converse with, no brakeman
{, bore hole into the effete atmosphere with
lis corkscrew voice, no peanutter to come
nd lean whole circulating library on my
r1, 81 l.