Weekly independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 1887-1914, 1889-03-03
selNo A WOMAN.
What She Tia. 4" u" u,d What tho stencr
SEA tion't tSo.

What She IIas tn ro nni What tho Stericr
SEA tion't Eo.
There isIt II mani i'll the world bat
thinks Il woman lEiS an cISy time.
thcrr isn't oiIn. If he had To "a through
the fuSs and bother uf being one. WHO
wouldn't liz III un insane ASYLUM IN
less than II year. In tie first place,
You must look we'll. y nan can
bc us ugly Us home made sin and still
lie popular. Whiskcrs cover up the
most Of his face. and even though lie
lias Il mouth Zig enough To take
in II whole mincc pic III Il
single bile. nobody suspects IT.
II he his wrinkles. nobody thinks ho
is getting old. but talk ubout tic lines
Of care on his forehead. Lines of carol
hurrhl In nine cases out of ten those
lines Of carp were caused By him scu!d.
my his wife when dinner was two
minutes late. or when one Of those
masculine buttons popped oil, and,
oh. my. what n hullahI!oo lie
sets UP then. Eut nobody says.
anything aboIt lines Of are on
her forriIc3dl Oh. mol And Il mans
nose might put Il blood rcd beet TO
shame; but nobody suspects he drinks.
oh. mol y ona must always DO
just So, must look charming and sweet,
no matter how sour she feels; she must
sing. and play on the piano and shy
something nice 10 everybody. Her
dress must hang aud fit just 80. have
| the latest quicker, even il is was made
in old Ncah's time. She must wear n
No. 3 shoe on IL No. . foot. ana look
we'll dressed on ~ cents Il week. She
cant 20 out alone Ut night, rs ON
must be protected; she cant Lc Il Free
mGson. rs shed tell ell about the goat
and the CREASED pig; she can't whistle,
c!!lab fences, stone cats, or say what
she feels when she gets l.iad. She
cant go accounting, but mist manage
some way to get married before she is
%. or everybody will feel terribly hurt
over it and sigh and wonder why she
"dnu't take" and ell the old maids
and widows in the nciGhborhood will
sIailc and nudge each other. Oh,
these significant chances are fifty times
worse than open Islander. It's all
awful thing to bc III old maid and
everybody knows il. Even tho
who arc married TO drunken
husbands, ard light and quarrel
tho scven days out Of the week,
live il M agony Of spirit over her and
talk about Tie poor old maid. And If
size has lad a sweetheart once. and lie
goes with any L else now, people
smile when they see her and quietly
rcuark SHE got left" when. in all
probability, lie wa the one who got
left. But sic must marry well, and
marry we'll means marry rich, and to
get married. il some peoples minds, is
the whole aim of Il woman's existence.
Ard when = woman does get married
the whole town put their heads to-
gctilcr and tall: over tho matter;
If she is good enough for him; ru
mention is made whether lie is good
enough for her or not. Chi no. Then
they will relate anecdotes, how siingy
her grandfather was; how lazy Err
Aunt Polly was. and how her grand
mother used TO sell beans and butter
milk. and swCCtcn her coffee with mo-
lIsScS. She must lie IL good cook, and
; do up her husbands silif Is so that when
; lie goes down town, past Il Chinese
laundry, John will Enasli his teeth.
grow green and yellow with hate and
envy, and twirl his pig tail in tho
air with tho sar!c unholy passion. She
/ must he able to lay her Hand on every
thing in a seconds time that her lord
AMI master may want, for n man
never knows where 10 find anything.
lie vii! put the bootiacli away ten
DERBY hide it in the darkest corner OF
the closet, thrp he'll turn the house
! upside down, from the top 10 tic bot
/ tom, and suddenly appear to lis wife,
with 6 c2untCnancc Ike that Of tho
nvcnging angel, and demand: What
III Thunder have you dono with tho
, boo;jGc,;!' Cic must shut I'll TIC
doors, likewise ell the bureau drawers,
Tor II man ncvcr vaGJ known to shut
either. y OEla always lia5 to 70 Ia
bed first in cold weather. lIo never
G2!;s her 10 do this. Oh, no; wants IA
finish this piece in tho paper, dear
and rats until she has tic sheets to Il
comfortable temperature. She must
always taI:o care Of the baby, ever
though tho first inrantilc wonder has
multiplied into y round hclf or
t!iicc-iourths Of q dozen. rs the
case rlay tc. If 10 douh!c1 VI
with tho collie, whDoping cough OF
tho necessary. evils Of cuttin. teeth,
parcGoric. lad temper, short sleeves,
, Garo legs and pins sticking in linn, he
! wants. to know Why sho don't Eccp
r her Eaby quiet. Cnd speaks ~ il che
alone wan 10 blame for the racket.
,'ncii sue Iccis U2u noDOuy ti:cE3 d
I shawl over l.cr on the couch. or cod.
dies ;cr 40 Il IMAM has To be coLdlcd
under sich circumstances. Nubcdy
closes the door any tofter when her
head IL splitting with q headache.
: Row If there is Il inGn living who
! thinks q woman has cn easy tine iucl
! let him have his lair pulled 10 tho Tor
= OF his l!c2:! and Il pound iioro Pinned
OF, ti'nt, &c. into II pair Of c%oiEcls, Tic
hall Il CU@Cn Republics Ground hi!
waist, Get into II dress that ho cam
more t!i&n breathe in. ard can't put
l his hands 10 his head without p~oppinf
open u sleeve, and Ec Il WOMEN cw;li!i
and tee how no likes il himself
DouSlnss Ice in ST. Louis l.cpublic.
CIllnckc I:CrrnrA.