The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1889-03-06
HINTS FOR YOUNG GIRLS.
A FAMOUS NoVEuIsT's ADVICE.
Mrs Alexander's Sensible Words TO Young
Women-The Power of the Gentle Sex
What Should BE the Basis OF
Girls Manner.


and that of young lady thirty or forty
years ago.
The timid air, downcast looks, the
bushes, the absence of self-assertion which
were considered the correct style, not
only for debutantes, but even for girls of
many seasons, have been replaced by fear
less If not bold glances. extreme compos-
ure, readiness to express opinions, which
are generally decided, in proportion to the
speakers youth, and very clear notion
as to personal rights. This sounds like an
ugly contrast, yet it is possible that society
is no loser by the change, if bushes and
timidity be exchanged for earnestness and
love of truth
Truth in thought and expression ought
TO be the basis of the modern girls man
ner. She is bound by the increasing
breadth Of her knowledge and training to
be sincere, to cast aside all petty affecta-
tons, all false seeming, and to endeavor
with what power Of heart and brain she
possesses to think out honestly all that Of
fers for consideration.
This reality need not wear the frightful
sound-hearted girl will never be unmind-
full of others. Nor is strength less strong
because its quartz is flecked with the gold
of tenderness. Neither need truth be too
outspoken. Silence respecting the inner
holes of conviction is always permissible.
The restfulness of simplicity and sincerity
gives charm to manner which must be
felt to be appreciated, and, beyond this,
10 = ~ rrI.fa oh
IT springs is a blessing beyond price.
Think OF being always Just your own self,
while the increasing graces OF tolerance.
Judgment and consideration become no
mere lacquered ornaments, but the steady
growth of conviction and self control,
deeply rooted in the subsoil OF the heart.
A girl so enriched is doubly endowed with
the strength of self-respect within and
the infinite attraction OF naturalness with
out.
Perhaps it is not necessary to insist so
much on the charm of naturalness to
American girls; they are said to possess
it in an eminent degree. We have not had
the pleasure of knowing many but the
American women we have met are GER
tainly delightful from their frank fearless
ness.
Another remarkable change brought
about by the new necessities of modern
life is the independence and freedom Of
women.
In most countries we are gradually out
numbering the men. The result is We
must work for ourselves if we can find no
one to work for US and the dearest wish
of each girls heart ought to be indie
pendence-the power OF maintaining her
Self.
No woman will make the worse wife or
mother because she has acquired accuracy,
punctuality and adaptability in learning a
trade or profession; rather will she be the
more capable of managing the details OF
her own house.
In this condition of things I see the
prospect of great moral improvement.
What woman, save the scum and dregs Of
Dur sex, would contract marriage with
any man not already dear to her? Could
she maintain herself by homes work !?
The terrible necessity OF bartering herself
for food and clothes and shelter-which
has influenced many a timid, unframed,
helpless woman-will gradually be ban
ished from civilized life.
Also will the stigma attached to the
Term "old maid pass away when more
unmarried women deserve the description
once given by shrewd old Scotchman:
''They just gather together the odds and
What boon the "auntie" is to many an
overtasked mother and struggling family
when the tenderness and endurance un-
needed by her own immediate surround
lngs are freely distributed among her
kinsfolk and acquaintance.
Nor do / see why a girl should be
ashamed OF having given her heart TO
man whose attentions she has misunder-
stood, or who has misled her. If his
heart is evil, hers may be good, and the
wisest make mistakes. There is no shame
IN loving heartily and faithfully, provided
self is respected and bleeding wounds be
not displayed to the half compassionate,
half contemptuous passers by.
In the relations OF marriage, too, though
men have a hattering idea of clinging ivy
round a sturdy oak, there are none of
them vino will not be thankful if the re-
alities OF married life prove to him that
he has partner whose courage and COM
mon sense make her a real helpmate,
always provided that the steel gauntlet is
duty hidden by velvet glove. Weak
ness is always Objectionable; it is more
apt to be awkward than graceful, more
ready to lapse from the curves OF beauty
into wavering unsightliness of outline
than the strength which can be delicate
as well as firm. Nor need strength create
that most painful and reprehensive sense
of rivalry WITH or unsympathetic resist
ance to. man which is one of the curious
let US hope, mushroom-growths of the
presentday.
The negative and positive poles of the
human race ought to dwell together in
unity, without any hateful notions oil
superiority or inferiority. Nature has
struck the true balance between US, what
ever the temporary variations of the scales
may be. To our fathers, brothers, lovers,
we owe warm affection, LOYAL service
ready sympathy, and niggardliness in these
free gifts will not improve them nor bene-
fit ourselves. What if their ranks, like
our own, are largely sprinkled with the
dishonest, the selfish, cruel, cowardly OF
mean-and it is not by twitting each other
with our respective faults and creating
resentful soreness, but by provoking each
other to love and to good works, that we
can struggle upward TO higher mental
and moral platform. Nor ought we accuse
men of ungenerOusly Withholding rights
and privileges which we only now dream
of claiming They will grant what they
must and no more. Nor would it do us
any good il they did. On our own heads
be it if We do not rise above our former
standing. In proportion to self-Improve-
ment and quiet strength will be the power
of women.
AS in greater things, the fundamental
principle rules all, and the girl who