Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1888-03-14

structor. arrived, the music stopped. His
coming was just in time to preserve the
dignities Of the occasion, for the music had
started forty pairs of feet into shufiilng on
the floor, which caused the dust to rise in q
cloud. The schoolmaster, being the highest
person in authority present, took the chair
and stated the object Of the me citing Said
he:
aye all know the object Of the present
meetin' without my tellin ye; so there's no
use o. my sayin' anything about it. But
may as we'll say, SO yell know fwat ye are
here for-Pat CooGan, will ye kape yer hans
off that squakin' win blower, SO l can hear
meself thinki-that ye are come, gintilmin,
to discuss the CRATE question, gintilmin, shall
we honor tn late st. Patrick-rest his sowl-
with percession or with banquit, where
there'll be attn an dhrinkin-that's tn queS-
ton, gintilmin. Now ye have it before ye.
Fwat will We do wild it''
Paddy Quinlan, who worked on the coal
docks, sat on the front seat. He was short
and stout and had great opinion of his own
ability as a debater So he arose and adj
dressed the chair:
MIR. Prisidint: In 1S47, in TIL snilin' month
o. May, was in Ireland Bad luck t. me,
wisht was thare now! Well, as was sayin',
was in Ireland thin. Fax, had plinty iv
attn an not too much work. Well, was
standin' on tn dock in Cork harbor, SO was,
jist fer divarshun, when fwat should l see
comm up tn harbor wild her sails all swellin'
like balloons but tn quane's yacht! Shure
she was loaded t tn guards wild wimmin an
childre, l'avin' thare native land behint thin.
That was a sight t make tears come in tn
eyes iv an Irish potato, so twas, Mr.. Prisi-
dint, am"
Here Mr.. Quinlan's address was interrupted
by man who had no sense of humor. He
wanted to know what the queens yacht had
to do with the subject under discussion. Mr.
Quinlan resented this interference, and said if
he was left alone he would soon come to the
point at issue. Cries of ''Go on, Quinlan, finish
your storyl' "Tell us about tn queens
ya-cht' Quinlan resumed
Had l tn eloquince o. Socrates, Mr..
Prisidint; had l tn musical vice O Jerry
myer, Mr. Prisidint an gintilmn; had l tn
winnin' ways O Danl O'Connell, who c'ud
talk u man out iv his house an lot, l cudn't
be tellin' tn haartaches on that occasion, so
c'udn't If l had my way I'd blow up tn
quane wild nitro
Here even the dignified gentleman in the
| chair was shocked. He rose and called Mr..
| Quil.lan to order. He wanted Mr.. Quinlan
| to understand that no such inHammable sub
stance as nitro glycerine could be introduced
| into that meeting. He had no fault to find
with the queen He thought the cabinet and
| the houses OF lords and commons were re-
sponsible for the troubles in Ireland "I'm q
paceablc, quiet, dacint Irishman, an if any.
one is goin t DO blown up wild nitro-glycer.
inc, blow up tn landlords, say 1! Blow thin
up higher than Gilderoy's kite! Blow thin
| t. smitherecns! An may tho cowld frog
crouch in tn ruins iv thare housesr'
| By this timo half the men in the school
house were on their feet. A confused babe
arose, and walking sticks We're flourished il
the air. In the midst of the confusion th.
chairman motioned to Coogan, tho accordion
player, and shouted above the din:
play thin somethin' soothin', Coogan
COogan mounted bench and began to pul
out OF his instrument the musical notes O.
"Dublin Bay" 1t acted like oil upon troubled
waters, and one by one the angry men re
sumcd their seats.
In tho meantime the secretary had mad
out a list of committeeman, and of thos
| present who were supposed to be willing t,
help along the celebrations; and now at tn
suggestion of the chairman he read tn
names, each man answering as his name wa
called. But when ho camo to the name 0
Patsey Farrell there was no response.
"Road TT louder, Mr.. Secretary, it nigh
be tn gintilmin is hero and didn't hear ye
"Patsey Farrellr' shouted the secretary, il
trumpet tones. There was no answer.
''Te may IS will 60 wan. He's not here,
said tie president.