Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1888-01-26
MOST NOBLE MARQUIS.
AN ENGLISH NORLEMAN VISITING
HIS IRISH ESTATE.

HIS IRISH ESTATE.
His Persistent Fad for soiled Linen-snub-
bling Gucst-Servants and Syeophants.
Surliness and Ill Breedins-Asleep at
the Breakfast Table.
One OF the most remarkable sights ! ever
witnessed was most noble marquis at break
fast in Dublin botel The nobIeman had
run over from England to attend to some
suits and eyictions on one of his Irish estates.
The estate in question extended over thirty
miles OF good farm land A landlord here is
| a landlord, indeed This particular noble
man had achieved great prominence during
his stay by the singular and persistent fad
that he displayed for soled linen The Irish
press exceeded itself in describing the shirt OF
| the most noble-as he was invariably STYLED
marquis
lie came into the coffee room one morning
with rather an i5resolute step and an eve
| that wavered behind his single glass His
attire was shabby and his shirt all that it
was held up to be. He was about 10, and
decidedly peevish. None of his travelling
companions mad shown up, and the MARQUIS
stood warming pair of carelessly cared for
hands at the fire till waiter approached
with deferential bow and whispered:
perhaps your lordship would like to sit
down"
"Demrlit."
Yes, sir, said the waiter, sympathetic
ally; 1t was apparent that his lordship meant
that he was cold and did not relish any inter
ruptlon OF his reverie by the fire So the
waiter laid table for four. and after time
the most noble marquis sank into one of the
chairs and fell to examining his finger nails
tie shook bis head dolorously when the in
spection was completed, and was evidently
eyelng neighboring fork, when a noisy
little Frenchman BUSTED in, and, rubbing his
hands briskly, cried:
"Good morning, good morning, m lawd.
How is it you find yourself this mornipga
Goods Eth: Ver' cold, though-good morn
ing"
sHCBBING GUEST.
He held his hand out to be shaken. but the
marquis pretended not to see it. The French
man then pushed the hand almost under the
marquis nose. The nobleman closed his ewes
ard yawned prodigiously. Then the foreigner
twiddled his fingers with incredible nervous
rapidity, while tho marquis glared at them
stupidity. never saw ANYTHING so protesnue
even in farce comedy on the stage The whole
room was now in state of aponized sns-
pense; walters stood still and guests sat with
forks poised in the air. At last the noble
marquis lifted his left hand and laid one
finger across the twiddling fingers of his
guest 1t was more of an insult than his pre-
vious action. The other squeezed the finger
rapturously, and then tall and fine looking
u ic <,f
strobe In. He, too, walked directly I'D to the
marquis and held out his hand. The host ex-
tended his left hand, and touching the ont
stretched palm, withdrew it again. Directly
behind the late conner was the fourth mem
Der of the party, a talland handsome captain
of dragons
"Haw,' he said, 'smaw'n.n
The marquis again put out his left snap
plsbiy, and after tho dragon had shaken
hands with all the others he too sank into his
chair. The nobleman is travelling here under
one OF his minor titles of Lord Merries.
though every one knows perfectly well who
he IS. All Englishmen have hidden longing
to travel under strange names in Ireland.
All the marquis friends and servants adj
dressed him with scrupulous care by his
assumed title
the marquis hurried in with the breakfast.
The three guests waited until the host was
served and web under way before they
touched their food. Then they began to talk.
1t was an interesting pantomme Every
time joke was made the eyes of all three
men looked sidewise at the marquis, If no
grlnned there was a roar of delight If he
didn't, there was dead silence
THE NoBLEMAN's FOOT GEAR.
He did not say word until he had finished
his chop, and then he broke into story of the
member Of parliament with:
''l-ah-wear low shoes now al-to-gethaw.
''Do you, indeed, my lordy' gushed the "
p, dropping his story at once and looking
with great eagerness under the table at the
uoblemans feet
-"Delightful,' said the Frenchman, radi-
antly.
''Devilish good thing to do" bawled the
dragon heartily, also looking under the
table
Because continued the great landed pro-
prietor, they ventilate the feet
Upon this a perfect clanor of approval
broke out among the guests. and they all
leaned over and admired til. low shoes of
the nobleman to an extent that would have
been silly if il had not been sickening. The
marquis soon lost interest in the subject, and
his guests branched off again. Occasionally
they addressed him pointedly, but he never
looked at and seldom answered them. He
was, in fact, as surly and ill-bred a snob as
ever saw. Finally he woke up from his ap-
parent stapor again and said to his personal
attendant:
Watkins, more bany and some old
cheese"
Would your lordship like gorgonzolas"
us that the rotten kindr'
The man bowed
Bring me- some,' said the marquis
shortly, II like the ah-cheeSe that can walk
alone
The outburst OF merriment at this was
overwhelming, and the three sycophants
talked cheese till the marquis revealed the
fact that he had lost interest in the subject
by going heavily to sleep in his chair-a
wizened, shrunken, untidy, sloveniy, snarl-
Ing looking little person with a weak chin, a
parchment skin. and protruding. yellowish
teeth. The others had finished their break
fast but they would not move til the mar
Quis avoke. L grew late and still the host
slumbered on. Finally the little Frenchman
slyly pushed big spoon off of the table, and
it fell with clatter that brought the mar
quis shivering and awake in an upright posi-
ton in his chair.
wv hat was tha:T' he asked sharply.
lone Of the French waters dropped o
fork. m lord" said Watkins, the servant,
quietly.
'Nawsty rats, foreigners" muttered the
most noble marquis. Then, without word
10 the eager and smiling men around hun. he