The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1888-12-21
A,iFuii.

No. l-E Ek7
New York Sun: A weary man Of
suburban aspect drew himself up to a
tramp yesterday who was wedged in be-
tween the corner of q city hall park set
tee and q neighbor.
Friend" spoke the weary man,
what will you take for your seat?"
The tramp did not evince much interest
in the inquiry or any desire to negoti:
ate.
Suppose" continued the tired looking
stranger, II was to sfTer you the price
of a glass Of beer, what would YOU do
with it?"
Il should go and get the glass of beer
replied the tramp.
Very well, here it is" said the way
farer, producing a nickel. Whereupon
the tramp took the nickel, III to the
nearest saloon, and the weary man sank
with a sigh of relief into the empty place.
Il never saw such a crowded town as
New York in my life," he remarked to
the neighbor. And being in an affable
mood he did not notice that that person
paid nj attention to his observation, but
continued: II came to New York last
Saturday, and | declare I've been on nv
feet and crowded Ii ever since. 1t be.
gan on the ferry boat. l had to stand up
all the way across the river. Then | got
on the elevated. No seats. l hung on
by a strap to my station. Then / went
to a hotel. Full. Went to another. Full.
AT last l got an inside eleventh story
room. Thinks |, after dinner 'Tn have a
little fun so | went to a neighboring
theatre. Standing room only was
stuck on the sidewalk. Invent TO another.
Seats all sold said the man in the box
Office.
We'll, | was disguised. l turned
away, thinking I'd go to bed, when l re-
membercd there was a political meeting
near by. So off l went to that, but /
could only get half way up the stairs to
the hall, 1t was such a jam. l balanced
on the staircase a few moments, and then
LETT and went across the street to a big
beer garden. But the walters were flying
around SO fast they would not look at me,
and go | soon got out of that as thirsty as
when | went in. ] spent the rest of the
evening waiting for a turn to get my Sun
day shave.
when Sunday came, now thinks /,
IN hear some of this famous preaching
and music they tell Of so got an adj
dress and poked off to church. Well, by
thunder, the same old crowd Hundreds
Of people standing in the aisles and
around the doors, and nobody to be seated
till the service was well agoing. l couldn't
bear that, so off went to another swell
church: but there was the same crowd
again, which satisfied me as to church
worship fer one day.
well, then, Monday l went shopping
To get some notions my wife wanted me
to buy for her. And such a crowd as |
got into! The place was a mob, only the
people in the thickest of it were shouting
Cash. instead of Murder 1t took me
pretty much all the afternoon to find the
right counters and get waited on. Then
| had TO wait for the dentist and the
c~hiropodist, and, by lingo, a pancake
man, who was selling cakes on the curb
stone, he made there; and go or every
where and forever, crowded full every
where. 1t was Just the same here, you
see, all the seats full. You saw ! abso-
lutely had to buy one"
just then the neighbor, who had shown
no interest in the grumbling narrative,
made a limp lurch which threw him
heavily upon the speakers shoulder and
almost into his lap.
The weary man started and looked at
the limp and booty neighbor in disgust
by thunder, he's full, tool he ex-
claimed, and he got up and left town.
When last seen he wss standing up on a
crowded ferry boat, valise in hand, with
a very disconnected expression of counte-
nance.