Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1888-07-06
The CAPTAINS CLOSE SHAVE.
A shark That swallowed Man
but Couldn't Digest Bottle.


There Is close shaves ana cioser-ayc.
much closer shaves," he reiterated with med
itative emphasis, as II personally unwilling,
yet naturally compelled, 10 admit as soli-evi'
dent truth this apparent tonsoral PROPOSE
tion.
''How now, captng-where awayP pipcd
grzzled and knotty looking son OF the brine,
with fo'cstle crony's breezi Anticipation oil
a yarn.
"You was a talking OF sharks, was you!
believe 1t were sharks, marey; am l right
Or"
"You are right, captlng; that we're the
course laid out, SO heave ahead" responded
the knotty little Jack who had spoken up at
first
The captains eye Immediately assumed a
far-away reminiscent look. He wiped his
beard on the back Of great, horny hand and
proceeded without much ado.
"Now, / can sav as sharks is curious crit
ters, and no mistake. They have their likes
and dsllkes, too, same as human bein'S But
howsomever, sharks amt all bad-nothing Is
though they mayn't be poplar with sea
faring indivljals like some other things.
Leastwise, one shark | knew intimate like
want a vicious cuss till unfort' nately kicked
by one Williams, which were unlucky for
both. We was messmates my last voyage in
the Polly, and a uncommon good seaman
were Williams, which IL is sad that he should
ha' fell out or in with such remark bic
shark. II were this wise: You see We was
homewsrd bound aud deep with rich catch
o oil. The Polly were a slow sailor at best,
and, though a greas, whaler, our skipper
were mighty proud O her name, which she
showed In be u-tful brass letters long % the
stern. These same letters must be allus
rubbed bright every day or the capting
blew great guns and shortened sail on our
grog, which the latter want pleasant weather
for US dogs in them days. Well We was in
the doldrums for a week, and every morning
the brass were made to look like gold. 1t came
our turn, and Williams aud me swings our
huks over the starn one hazg morning, ana
sat half a-dozing and half a-polis hing at the
same time for an hour. 1t were sleepy wealth.
or and lazy work My bare toes jest about
touched the water, that were all and were
a-wondering when We would get the next
capful O. Wind and from what quarter when
something lectle colder n the water bObbed
again my great toe. | didn't mind II first,
and 1t bobDel three times aforc | thought
euything about IT, Then / looked down, and
Lordy as true's Davy Jones' locker, IL there
want a shark mates, half as big as a whale.
a-rubbing his gray snout again my toe in the
friendliest way you ever see and a-looking
straight into nv face. The shark had look
" human Intelligence In his eyes, bDt TO save
my soul couldn't ha' novel; WAS that
scared. He nosed nv toe 3 II IL were an old
friend and he were fond OF It, and ! had TO
Sit quiet and let him do IL, too ! was so cold
and stiff with the fright | swear | couldn't
ha' looked anywhere but straight into the
man-eater's eyes, not for the whole cargo.
He had charmed me. | knew it, aud IL were
a horrible weak feeling; but couldn't help
half noticing that he didn't attempt TO turn
nor show his teeth Then o sudden, and
my heart bumped M, / saw an ugly look and
hts blue fms a-coming sitter. felt my brain
go round and round and then a crazy notion
took hold o. me 10 drop plump down 10 him
IL we're terrible and made me dizzy. Mind
you, all this took place in second but IL
seemed years as ! had been in the critters
power The next instant | saw nay mate VII
lam's foot a moving slow like-he had on
heavy shOes-and % a sudden kick at the
head OF the fish. Quick as gunpowder the
vsrmint see him do lt-had been watching
hm-turned, snapped his big jaws, and with
an awful shrick-l can hear II uow-Williams
shot like lightning under the starn, and
red streak aud bubbles on the water were all
the trace left o the poor lad ! were hauled
on deck faint, and staggered like drunken
man, TIL stiff glass . spirits were poured
down my throat, when | come to-
THAT we're what call a close shave, mates;
out WHAT TOOK place soon AFTER were the queer
part Of the yarn. Nv shipmaies swore by the
Dutchmsn the,'d catch that man eater, and
so they did. though it took some time. The
breeze had just pulled up SOU SOU west one
fine evening when the cooks boy reported a
shark in tow To the watch That varmint
were soon hooked aud baulel on board with
a will The crew just cut and backed the
crtter till they was tired. ANY sailor'l do
that TO shark. And, by The compass, Il
were the same lubber Ms had kissed my toe
and dragged down poor Williams, but, bless
We, there were not enough OF that unfortunate
seaman left to read prayers over But there
were someth Dg In the stomach of the fish
were little flask that | remember a-seeing
Williams fiji aud put in his pocket the morn
ing he were lost. Think OF it. That shark
had dgested all o. poor Williams but his
bottle o. grog, and claimed that as his mess
mate. Now, msteys Pye got thai same flask
o. rum up in my loft, and II any o. YOU doubt
IL Is genuine come up and taste it,and can't
say no farer'n that.-BrOokiyI Times