davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1888-11-24

1t Is vital fact that vast majority
OF divorce suits are started by women,
and hardly once In dozen times do they
set forth the real reason for wanting a
separation. Strolling into the Court
House tho other day overheard the
following significant conversation in
the hallway between two dainty young
women, both Of them jauntily dressed
and both OF them talking as IL perfectly
careless whether their conversation was
overheard or not.
"Good morning, Mrs. A."
"Why, Mrs. b., good morning. How
is your divorce suit progressingS"
Slowly, I'm sorry TO say how is
yoursg"
1.-THE same. IL takes that old codger
in charge Of my case SO long TO do any
thing, ! don't care what"
so, they're all that way. Mrs. r. My
lawyer has pottered along for months,
but he tells me that I'm sure TO succeed,
and may have decree any day now"
How / envy you! IL may be a full
six months yet before i am free. Per-
haps I'll fail altogether"
"If you do, will you return to your
husband?'
Milky. Not il know myself Would
your"
"Never. I've had enough of married
life TO last me the remainder of my
days"
And l."
Eyes, matrimony is failure, / don't
care what people say. I've tried il and
IL made drudge OF me; but won't be
fooled second time. Why, my hus-
band treated me like n slave. III went
out riding ordanced with any gentleman
except himself he would lecture me by
the hour-tell me would make myself
talked about and all that"
1.-The brute. That's just the way my
husband served me until things finally
came 10 crisis. / went TO the theatre
one night with n young man who used
TO be n classmate OF mine at school.
After the performance we had wine and
oysters Mt down town restaurant, and
because il was little after one o'clock in
the morning when / returned home my
liege lord saw fit TO reprove me furious
ly. Why, you won't believe IL, but he
even threatened TO knock my friend in
the head if ever went out with him
again"
shameful. What did you do?"
"Do! just packed up my things and
returned home TO my parents. l wasn't
born TO be the serf OF any tyrant."
81 glory in your grit. But l have an
engagement with an elegant young
man. Made an appointment with him.
Good bye"
Good bye, dear. have n similar en-
gagement myself. So long! Will see
you again"
And the two merry young matrons
parted.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1888-11-24

rlrst Giri-"Say, Maryi what became
OF Charley Barrcttg didn't you keep COM
pany with him.
Second girl-"Oh, dear, yesi but
shook him some time ago"
First Girl-"But l thought he was
nice fellow: seemed 10 be so liberal, you
know"
Second CLIFTON, yes, know IL. And
he worked in kid glove factory, and
used TO bring me tho lovlest kids you
ever saw; but he wanted me to marry
him. and ] shook him."
First Girl-"Goodnes me, what fore'
Second Girl-"Well, / didn't love him:
and wasn't going to marry a man just
for kids"
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1888-11-24

double rays, surmounted by a crown or
wreath Of laurels, with an inscription
fitting the form of government in vogue
at the time OF the appointment. The
reverse side shows the tricolor and the
inscription, "Honneur ct Patrie." The
star Of the knights is Of silver; Of the
other classes, OF gold. The star is worn
as follows: BY the knights, on the left
breast, on red ribbon, without rosette;
by the officers, on the left breast, with n
rosette; by the commanders, on the
same place, but with longer and wider
ribbon.
The grand officers wear the same star
as the officers, and, in addition, on the
right breast, n larger star of five rays,
made OF silver; the highest class wear
the great star Of the grand officers on
the left breast, and in addition of wide
sash over tho right shoulder, 10 which
is fastened n cross OF smaller dimensions
than the star of the grand officers.
Among the Knights of the Grand Gross
are Prince Bismarck and General Moltke,
the Grand Vizier of Persia, Hadji Mira,
Hassein Khan, the Duke dc Montezuma,
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1888-11-24
commendable Caution.

A celebrated criminal lawyer. having
just defended noted assassin so brill
iantly that the wretch was acquitted in
the face Of overwhelming evidence,
steps up 10 the Judge.
"a word In your ear, your Honor"
Judge Well, what is it?"
IL would ask that the prisoner be de-
tanned IN jail until tomorrow morning.
I have 10 cross n lonely field on my way
home, and the rascal happens to know
that have money about met"
Obliging Judge-''Oh, certainly"
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1888-11-24

These are only few samples OF the
hundreds OF nonsensical bets made and
reported from all parts OF the country.
There was n larger number OF such
wagors, or agreements, than have ever
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1888-11-24

Gus bet. The young man agreed. II he
lost to climb the Democratic pole and
tack two brooms at the top. The young
lady to perform the same feat on the
Republican pole IL Cleveland should be
elected. The young lady won. but
Harrison would never have carried
Nyack II the bet had been made public
before election.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1888-11-24
SOCIETIES OF HONOR.
The Order OF the French Legion OF Honor
and Order OF the Garter.

The Order OF the French Legion OF
Honor was founded by decree Of Consul
Napoleon. Floreal 20. X january 10,
1909, 10 reward valiant deeds OF the
military and civilians for rendering
great services TO the State. The order
governed by a Chancellor, who confers
directly with the Sovereign or Chief
Magistrate Of the nation. The order Is
divided into five classes; Knights. Of
flcers' Commanders, Grand Officers and
Masters Of the Grand Cross. The num-
Der OF Knights is unlimited, that of the
Officers is fixed at 1000. Of the Com
manders at 1000, OF the Grand Cross at
so. Foreigners who are decorated with
the star or cross do not become the MEM
bers Of the order. They stand in about
the same relation TO il as do nonresident
members TO n fashionable club. The
decoration consists OF star Of five
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1888-11-24

A CHICAGOAN'S SACRIF1CIO MUSTACIIO.
Peter Delp, OF Dearborn street
saloon, and Ira Hogan, OF the fremont
House, wagered their moustaches. and
put up a cash forfeit. Hogan is the
victim, but il is safe TO say that the
fremont House will never be deprived
Of it's grandest attraction. Not this
year.
Elmer Thomas, OF Cleveland, loves
Nina Webster, and was foolish enough
IN agree TO the postponement Of their
wedding till another Democratic presi-
dent is inaugurated. He now says mar
riage is a failure, and can't get Nina TO
listen minute TO proposal for calling
the bet Off. because she went hurrahing
Tuesday night with Harrison young
man and likes him better.
John Peterson, of Mooihead, Mimi,
will straddle the peak OF barn and re-
main there all day, while the Moodhear
street urchins will bow putty balls at
him and yell "Come of yer perch!"
John Windbeil, OF Chicago, will stand
on corner for five hours, grinding a
hand organ. He will have full oppor-
tunity 10 determine what protection is
like, for he'll need il IL those dago
grinders get on 10 his curves.
An indianapolis young man agreed to
marry Clarke county girl if Cleveland
should be defeated, or give her 800.
He lost and she took the one hundred
dollars, arguing that a shrewd Republic
can can buy whole crowd OF Democrats
with that much money
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1888-11-24

A Chicago man will partake OF boiled
crow in one Of the best known restau-
rants. The bird can be cooked in any
way which the eater desires, but must
not be smothered in any kind OF sauce.
II must be plain crow in It's plainest at
tire.
Louis Hemerwalj, Philadelphia
brewer, wagered head Of very nice
curly hair. He lost. and for one long
month he must 60 around with his head
shaved smick, smack. smooth. Like
Growers domestic outlook, il will be
some time before there is any heir APP
parent.
A Nyack, N. ", couple made q Curl
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1888-11-24

Theodore Kohn, Chicago barber, ~ill
have TO cut customers hair four years,
receiving nothing for his pains but ex-
perience, which, however, is something.
OF course the Harrison man will always
go Saturday evenings TO get his hair re-
duced.
A Philadelphia brewer agreed TO jump
into the canal ifCleveland should lose the
election, while another employe agreed
to do likewise il Harrison should lose.
The Cleveland man paid the forfeit like
man, and for the first time in ten
years he experienced the sensation Of
swallowing little water.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1888-11-24

been reported during national cam
paign. The losers have created any
amount Of fun. and so long as a laughter
makes people better, there has been no
particular harm done.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1888-11-24

WAUkEHAN NAN EATS BOIsED CHOW.
In Norwalk. CT, two editors wagered
their monstaches. John Wade, OF the
Norwalk Hour, has beautiful red
moustache, of that peculiar hue, il
worn on the head OF girl, would draw
every white horse in the town in sight
Of her. John Rhodemeyer, of the Re
cord, had light blonde moustache,
which by careful cultivation had be-
come the pet OF all the ladies in the
town, but confidence in free trade quite
bare his lip has made.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1888-11-24
WE SHALL NEVER FLY.

N II HFENEF EH""NA EHFFHF = W = %
lie Contc.
In face Of all the theories put forth by
the inventors Of flying machines comes
Prof. Le Coute, in tile November number
OF the Science Monthly, declares that
flying machine, pure and simple, that is,
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1888-11-24

In Danbury two gentlemen who four
years ago wore Mother Hubbards and
cried INA, ma, where's my par differed
on the issues Of the present campaign,
and now the adherent of Growers free
trade policy has got TO resurrect the
discarded costume, purchase new poke
bonnet and ride through town yelling
protective tariff creates high wages. !"
Two athletic young Westsiders made
an odd bet. They agreed that the loser
should strapup one leg and hop on the
other from the Tribune Office TO the
Eden Musee on Wabash avenue.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1888-11-24
ELECTION BETS.
Funny Things Which Have Been
Done Since Election

Country Jokers Numerous This Year
Noustachcs Scattered to the Winds
md Heads Shaved with Inn
punity - Some Queer
Love Beta Lost
and Won.
The presidential campaign y. 1888
brought out many queer bets. At St.
Louis Sergt johnson and Private Wallace
agreed TO run gauntlet Of i20 soldiers,
each soldier 10 be armed with musket
and sheathed bayonet wound with cloth
and topped of with rag ball, but not
wound to that extent that that thrust
in the ribs would not be smartly felt by
the victim. Private Wallace did the
running, and eye witnesses say that he
ran almost as we'll as Private" Fifer.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14
HunterdoB Democrat.
REPUBLICAN.

/ do not think that the high license
local option bill will have any marked eff
feet upon the elections in this county next
Fall. This city is the largest town in
the county, and know of no Republican
10 it who will refuse to vote the party
ticket because of the passage of this law.
A number, undoubtedly, will remain 10
the party who otherwise would have gone
out, and few third-pa Prohibtionists
will return to 1t.
AS to the Democrats, have no reason
to suppose that any of them will unite
with the Republican party by reason Of
the passage of this act. But on ques-
ton of approval of its passage there are
hundreds of Democrats in the county who
would vote 10 the affirmative.
CLARK PIERsoN,
LAMBERTvILLE RECORD.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14

AT the annual meeting of the Lam
bertville Water Company, held at the
office of John Lilly, Esq, March 8, 1888,
the following Directors were elected for
the ensuing year, viz !: Charles A. Skill
man, W. V. Cooley, Torbert Coryell, A.
D. Anderson, Sylvanus Ayres, Gershom
Lambert Warren 4 Greene, William B.
Niece and Miers Coryell
At an adjourned meeting, held at the
same place, March Q, 1888, the Board or
ganized by appointing the following
officers
Observation-Disclosures A. Skillman.
Secretary and Treasurer-W.V. Cooley.
Superintendent Coryell.
Executive Committee-W. v. Cooley,
A. D. Anderson, Torbert Coryell.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14

=" skinny" Dempsey appears to have
mania for breaking windows. He has
twice been arrested for this offence and
once sent to jail for it. Last night, about
midnight, he went into Ashton's saloon,
on Church street. and asked for some
thing to drink, which was refused.
Thereupon he went out, and as be did so,
kicked out one of the glass in the front
door of the saloon. Waterman Hurley
happened to be going by and he attempt
ed to arrest Dempsey, who resisted and
was knocked down, but he twisted out Of
his coat while Mr.. Hurley was holding
him and ran up Gordon's alley. Mr..
Hurley ran after him, but buried himself
suddenly in snow bank, and Dempsey
escaped, leaving hiscoat lin which was
pocketbook, with money and his hat in
Mr.. H. Is possession.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14
INDEPENDENT.

would state, 10 my opinion, that the
passage of the high license local option
bill would be very favorable to the Dem
ocratic party. The Prohibitionists in this
section do not think that the Republicans
are honest or sincere in the passage Of
this bill. am satisfied that the Prohi-
bitionists will stand firm to their cause
and fight il out on the line IL it takes a
lifetime. God grant that they may.
P. X. HAzEN.
Ldn,6ertDige Beacon.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14

A number Of Paterson liquor dealers
within the past few days have called on
the Register of Licenses with applica-
tions to the Board of Aldermen for re-
newal of their annual licenses in advance
of the time Of expiration, hoping thus
to defeat the intent of the new high
license law which goes into effect May
LIST, and to come under the old $50 fee
for another year yet. Register Henry,
however, fatty refused to receive any
such applications,
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14
pRoHrBITIoNIsT.
LAMBERTvILLE RECORD,

This county is usually strongly Demo-
cratic, and is nothing else save by acct
dent. Senator Large and Sheriff Cox,
both Republicans, were elected by the
disaffection caused by the Pidcock wing
of the Democracy. The local option high
license bill will not affect politics as much
as Pidcock VS.. Anti Pidcock The license
option law will not, in my opinion, change
the political complexion of Hunterdon
county. G.. w. EVERETT,
Clinton Home Visitor.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14
--The new depot Of the Philadslphia

The new depot of the Philadelphia
and Reading Railroad Company in Tren-
will be very handsome structure, 'front.'
ing on three streets. 1t will be built Of
Trenton brown stone, and the main en-
trance will be on Warren street. There
will be ladies' and gentlemen's waiting
rooms and other modern conveniences.
One of the features will be driveway
for carriages, something similar to that
at the Broad street depot, Philadelphia.
The building will be two stories high
and will have a cupola, in which will be
large clock having four dials. On
each side of the main entrance will be
large bay windows. and directly over
these will be large dormer windows.
The whole cost will be something in the
neighborhood of $3.50, 900.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14
SPRING ExurpIrroN AT RlNeoEs.


From The Ringoss Monitor.
Prof. c. w. Larson held his closing
exercises last Friday, March 9th. The
afternoon was balmy and spring-like
and a goodly sized audience assembled
within the walls of the Academy, to lis
ten to the essays, declarations, music,
etc, to be rendered by the students of
the institution,
The declarations were fairly well de-
livered and treated on subjects of ines
Unable information and interest, The
pronunciation was distinct and the
truths meant to be brought out were pro-
perly emphasized and expressed. While
there were no Ciceroneon addresses
given, yet the boys did tolerably well.
The essays were of a superior nature.
Pithiness, conciseness and viyidness
of expression, marked various writings
as being particularly lucid and intelligi-
bic. The essay of Polly Larson was a
remarkable production. Miss Pollys
subject was "The Earth" and the
theme was treated with the skill and
keenness of a scholar of mature years.
This young lady, who is the Professors
daughter, does justice to her fathers
Phonetic spelling. The young lady is
apparently master of the sound of every
letter in every word. In her essay the
English language was expressed sit is;
it is a pleasure to hear words spoken SO
clearly and distinctly In the reading
of this essay the beauty and necessity of
Phonetic spelling was clarified. The
young lady did honor to her fathers I'M
firing efforts to reform the English Ian
guage. The essay on Australia was also
excellent.
The music furnished for the occa-
sion was well rendered. The exercises
closedsby the Christian selection, "For-
give and Forget" and no doubt, many
said to themselves as this beautiful
piece was sung, it is easy to forgive, but
difficult to forget
Let the students of the Academy of
Science and Art realize that they are
enjoying superior facilities, which will
only be valued in future years. The
Academy at present, is not generally
popular institution, but we sincerely be-
lieve the day will come when young
men and women will feel proud that
they have been enrolled on the cata-
logue of this institution. The day will
dawn, and not many years hence, that
will bring honor to Prof. Larson, as one
who was most prominent in reforming
our language. The learned men Of the
lard are taking this matter up, and at
present the arduous e;ertions of c. w.
Larson are not appreciated, but there is
glory and victory ahead.
While in many things we are not in
accord with the Doctor, yet we believe
in giving every man his dues.
The next term will begin the first
Monday in April.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14
Not Seen 1t /,

Not Seen 1t!
Not seen the New Davis Sewing Ma.
chine Then you don't know anything
about pleasure in doing your sewing, and
never will know what comfort is until
you have seen and operated this perfect
machine. 1t is well calculated to make
mankind happier and better on earth,
and, therefore, no less fitted for the great
hereafter. The "Davis" should be in
every home. 1t makes the tired mother,
and over-worksd housewife more cheer
full. 1t brings back the smiles, and BAN
ishes the blues caused by using the old,
cumbersome and heavy machines. Don't
let the sun go down another day without
calling upon Samuel J. Pickering, Agent,
George street, above Coryell, who sells
the New Davis Vertical-Feea Sewing
Machine, The machine Of machines |!
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14

Is good memory, without which the
student, business man or scientist loses
what be gains. Prof. Losette's wonder
full discovery enables his pupils to learn
aoy book, poem, lecture or treatise in one
reading or hearing. Endorsed by Prof.
Richard A. Proctor, the astronomer, Hon.
William Waldorf Aston, late U. 8. Minis
ter to Italy, Mark Twain, the great hu-
morist, Hon. Judah p. Benjamin, the
famous jurst, aud hundreds of others
who have all been his pupils, besides
classes the largest on record, as 1887 at
Baltimore and 1908 at Detroit, &C., &c.
The system is also taught by correspond.
ence. Address Professor Loisette, 237
Fifth Avenue, New York, for prospectus.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14

The barn and other outbuildings of
Robert Fl. Kitchen at Centerville, in this
county, were destroyed by fire on Tues
day night of last week. Two horses,
several tons of hay, three wagons, the
stock of grain, and farm machinery we're
also burned. Mr.. Kitchen had gone to
the barn after dark to look after sick
horse. He set the lantern down behind
the animal, and it was kicked over, set
ting fire to the straw. The flames spread
with such rapidity that it was impossible
to save any of the contents. The loss is
about $1,000.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14
EMPEROR WILLIAM DEAD-ACCEs-
SION OF THE NEW SOVEREIGN.

BERLIN, March 9.--Emperor William
died at half-past O'Clock this morning.
At 2 o'clock this morning he was sleeping
soundly, but as the dawn drew near be
grew weaker, and the spark of life again
began TO flicker. This proved to be the
final struggle, and at $50 O'Clock Ger
many's venerable and honored Emperor
was dead. To day in the Reichstag Prince
Bismark announced that the new King
would assume the title of Frederick III.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14

An excess of animal food and a partial
closing of the pores of the skin, during
the winter months, cause the system to
become filled with impurities. These can
be removed and the blood purified and
inyigorated by taking Ayers Sarsaparilla.
Price 81.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14

AT the annual meeting of Union
Steam Fire Engine Co., No. /, of this
city, held on Thursday evening, March
9th, 1888, the following officers were
elected to serve for the ensuing year
Observation-Disclosures A. Skillman.
Vice President-Jonas ]. Warman.
Secretary-Willian FL. Moon.
Treasurer-Charles Schuhaus.
William B. Sweazey.
First Assistant-Edward J. Probasco.
Second Assistant-Scott Thorne.
Third Assistant-William W. Smith
Fourth Assistant-Charles NJ. Carries.
Engineer William Probasco.
First Assistant-Cbarles B. Reading.
Second Assistant-Sanford Dilley.
Third Assistant-Jonas j. Warman.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14
s. w. Cochran a. Co. +,

D W. UOchFHH ~ OU',
Have secured sole agency for Lambert
vile, N. j., for the sale of BRoMo Com
POUND, the only and wonderful remedy
for Neuralgia, Headache and Nervous
ness. This medicine is taken inwardly,
an immediate relief guaranteed. 1t is
not quackF or patent medicine, but
purely chemical compound. Try it. %
cents per bottle. Prepared only by
ARTHUR SCHWARTZ,
Pharmaceutical Chemist,
Trenton, N. j.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14

Beef steak, sausage, ham and eggs,
veal outlets, picked tongue, goldfish
cakes, baked beans, coffee, tea, oysters in
every style; mince, lemon, cocoanut, GUS
tard and other pies, are to be found at
the Pearl Restaurant. feb 30 If
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14

Gentlemen, you can get your clothes
cleaned and pressed at 80 Swan St., as
good as at any place in the country, none
excepted. Overcoats $3.50; Goats $1.0O;
Pants 10; Vest 80. Ladies' goods at
reasonable prices. Satisfaction guaran-
teed. w. RoUeHToN.
aDr7, 1T
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14

-Messrs. Riggs s. Co., business and
financial brokers. 7O3 Walnut street.,
Philadelphia, have sold for Winfield s.
Black his store at Rosemont, in this
county. The purchaser is MIR. A. H.
Bisbing, of Wyoming Territory. Mr.. P.
B. Mackey, formerly of this city, is con-
nected with Biggs & Co., and any bust
ness that may be entrusted to him for the
firm will receive careful attention.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1888-03-14

For RENT, from April list next, the
store, corner of Union and Coryel streets,
Lambertville, now occupied by @. l..
Baumgartner. For terms, particulars,
sc inquire of CLARK PIERsoN.