The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1888-04-21
O'SHERRY'S TRICK.
How Captain baltimore Lost His
Whiskers.

How many men enter the army solely on
account of the uniform? How many of
those who are supposed to be enamored of
the adventures and perlls of a soldiers life
are enamored only of the tinsel and trap
pings OF soldiers coat? 1t would be inter
esting TO know, but owing to the unac-
countab reticence on the part of those so
influenced, it is impossible to discover.
Still, occasionally there occur cases where,
though no confession is made, shrewd
guess may be hazarded that aesthetic consid-
eratiOns had much to do in inducing the gal
liant warrior to choose a military career.
Captain DallimOre'S was one of these Cap
tain Dalton baltimore was not a very adyen-
furious, nor very courageous, nor very
ambitious man, but he was unquestionably
very conceited one. His conceit, however,
referred only to his appearance. He never
imagined that he was cleverer Drawer, or
more high-minded than his fellows; in fact.
his private opinion was that in these quail
ties he was rather below than above them.
Bat when it came to good looks-well, every
the he glanced in his glass; and that was
pr aty often, he felt, with thrill of pleas
ulV that there he had the advantage of most
pc le.
nd he was not bad-looking fellow He
h q rather long face, passably good fea-
Il IS, and fairish hair, and he wore mus
tG re, large mutton-chOp whiSkers, and a
pt. 'e-neg. He was very tall and very slight;
an his clothes-which is not always the
c"se even with military men-were OBJ
vic uSly made for himself.
His appearance was better than his man.
aer; that was affected and insipid TO a de-
gree. He could be induced to manifest
Gothing but the most languid interest in
anybody or any thing about him. No mat
ter what was the subject which was occupy
ing the attention of the rest of the company,
mis- attention was concentrated on himself
While the others We're testing, chatting, or
ilsputlng he was engaged examining the fit
II his jacket or the cut of his overalls, or
else stroking his mustache and passing his
fingers affectionately through his whishers.
These latter hirsute appendages were the
cause of much mockery and heartburning
IN the regiment. His brother officers
strongly disapproved of them. They could
understand and sympathize with his devo-
lion to his mustache-they all wore mus
taches themselves, which they carefully
aurtured and tenderly cherished-but he
was the only man in the regiment who
Iported whiskers, and the others regarded
ais indulgence in them as an unwarrantable
license, not to say breach of discipline.
DOilJi lily wy, OuO WOuh SdI, WHY
ion't you shave and look like a Christian?"
Prefers to look like a goat" another
would growl.
"You see," third would put in, ''he's not
rery energetic, and the whskers save him
good deal OF work; with them he has only
so wash half of his face"
''lf were the Colonel" a fourth would
seclare, "he should either shave or leave
the regiment"
But Captain baltimore would only laugh
sanguidly at all such coaxing bullying and
cemonstrance. He loved his whiskers, and
was determined not to lose them. Besides
ne suspected that envy had something to do
with his fellow officers disapproval.
Captain Dalton baltimore never regretted
his choice of profession. The Lancer uni
form exactly suited his taste and figure His
duties he found light, aud, on the whole,
agreeable; while the effect of his lace, spurs
and charger upon the ladies was all that
could be desired. The only drawback he
sver found was the fact that his regiment
was so frequently stationed in remote vii
lagos, where he had little company and little
opportunity Of receiving what he felt was
bis due of feminine admiration and atten-
lion.
His delight, therefore, can be imagined
when his regiment received orders to leave
She obscurity of Braxby for the publicity
and gayety of the Irish metropolis He had
been in Dublin before, and knew what he
had TO expect there-not an occasional din
ner at Lord Broadacres or Squire Cherry's,
or dance every six months at the town
hall, but a succession of banquets, recep-
lions and balls, and the admiration and de-
votion of scores of the prettiest women in
Europe.
The gallant Captain was not doomed to dis
appointment. Dublin proved every thing
chat he expected. All that was wealthy,
beautiful and fashionable in the city re-
ceived the Lancers with open arms. Cards
of invitation from the castle, Merrion
square, and Old Trinity came in scores to
every officer's quarters. From Colonel to
Lieutenant they were all in demand every