davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-05-05

For sale by the following druggists: Polk
Miller ( Co.. 9th 4 Main; "a. G. F0rssmann. 6i9
vest Main: A. +. Johann SO west Main; G.. ".
Ladmer. so YES Marshall: Cary Bros, $50
Lolgh; Harrison & Piorce, Broad & Foushee: l.
Co, 80 i Main; IS. T. Dupuy. AZ Broad: " |.
Moody. Manchester anu Virginia. Il. NJ. SHIELD
( Co. 900 east Marshall; A. q. rnellings L Bro,
Manchester, Va; G. +. Sauer n Co., i7ih X
Broad; j. A. Golden, SIC north Eth; b. {. Lewis.
10 east Leigh; }. 4. Lewis. east Broad: T. r.
Reese & Co., coz cas-. Nag.hail {. T. Berrtan. ~
north l4th; q. Roberts Baker, 9le east Main.
Briggs Bros. lst & Main: f.. j. Morrison, a5ij east
Broad; q. w. TurnAc, sl20 east Naln; /. W.
Ffayser, las Main; W. Il. Scott. 18th & Frank-
lin; w. +. Phillips. slh 4 Mais: l.. p. Koutt- III
east Main; L. Wagner: 80 Broad W. NJ. WI.
liams, 2ilg VenGOle; a. H. Robins, 523 north "a /:
J. A. BOcK, 5o4 Broad. !. +. Reed, 50i 18th. l. I.
Beysriige, 4s3 Brook; l. <. sale, 200i Veuable:
D. blair, broad stl' Gp SS-eOdGy36
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-05-05

We fear that the communication Of
"N. and p" would do more harm than
r,ooI
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-05-05

EXCURSION TO WARRINGTON
IL by Richmond. FRED ercksburg and Potomac
railroad SATURDAY MONT, HAY s. 1855
Train leaves klba station OF 1890 O'Clock !;
returning, leaves Washington Monday the 7th
at $40 2. n. Fare for round Trip. 81; 70 Fredo.
ricxsburg, 81. Tickets Zoe rale by J. NJ Thomp-
son, corner Second aud Broad streets; starko
x sou, 800 east Main street. and at The train by
J. N. THOMPSON q bhoIHgR
ap 2lsi.s6. 29&Myi.s.3i&5
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-05-05

These seven beautiful boys owe their beauty Of
skin, luKurilnce OF hair, purity Of blood, and
freedom from hereditary faint or humors Of tho skin
or scaip 90 toe celebrated CUriCuRA REMEDIES.
For cleansing, purifying and identifying the skin
Of children and infants, ami curing toriurog, di'-
figuring, itching, scaly and pimply diseases Of the
skin. scalp and blood. with loss Of hair, from in.
fancy TO Old age, CUricrnA, tho great skin cure,
AMI CuricuRA SOAR, an exquisite skin bcauihcr
prepared from il externally, and CUTIcuEA RE-
SOLVENT the new blood purifier. internally, arc
infallible.
Your most valuable CUTIcuRA REMEDIES have
done my child 30 much good that feel Ike saying
thi, for the benefit Of those who are troubled with
skin disease. My little girl was troubled with
Eczema, and tried several doctors ard incidence,
but did not do her any good until used the Crrl-
cuM REMEDIES, wlish speedily cured Der. .or
which owe you many thanks nnd many nights Of
rest. ANTON BOssINER, Edinburgh, lad.
Tho CCrIcCRA REMEDIES are tn great demand
The CuricrnA RrsoLyENr sells better than any
other blood purifier. The CUricuRA SOAP "a
praised by my customers, especially mothers, who
ray 70 is the best for babies, preventing and curing
seal head and similar diseases.
GEORGE HOBBS, P. r., Collins, Texas.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-05-05
T OW RATES ON STEAM S.tzSr.
Err ARIEL
FOR MOONLIGHT AND DAY EXCURSIONS,
BYwalcH
CHURCHES, SOCIETIES, AND OTHER ORGAN.
IZATIONs CAN PAY OFF THEIR
INDEBTEDNESS.

This company Is now ready 70 engage the pop
ular TUESDAY AND THURSDAY MOON-
LIGHT EXCURSIONS ~ on a cheap cooperative
plan without risk OF loss.
Also, DAY EXCURSIONS 20 Old Point. Nor
folk. and Virginia Beach on = very liberal aud
profitable plan 10 excursion parties
Call for circular showing plans of excursiona.
IRWIN WHISPER,
Agent Virginia Steamboat Company,
ap 2S-ts III east Maip street
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-05-05
BRIEF COuJIENT.

It wouldn't be q bad idea TO get JoHy
L. Sullivan to tackle saw mill.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-05-05

WrLG SMD.-The AuiJor Pccocd
says
But whether the President is Pro
tectioni-t or a free Trader whether he
is unconditouniy opposed 20 or in favor
OF the repeal Of the internal revenue
system, there exist many other considera-
lions which rise far above and complete
" oycrshaiow the tariff and the internal
revenue in the estimation Of the average
Democrat IN these parts, and in them
may be found the real reasons why the
non-Intellgcnt Democrats of Halifax en-
dOrse Cleveland
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-05-05
NOTICE on MEETING.
~ We, the undersigned, stockholders OF tho
RICHMOND AND WEST POINT
TERMINAL RAILWAY

WAREHOUSE COMPANY,
folding together ono tenth and more Of the capt.
tol stock OF the said company, hereby call gem
eral meeting OK the stockholders Of said com
pany, Ia DO held at Ballard House Hal. In tho
city " Richmond, on the Dist DAY OF MAY, al
O'Clock I'M tho afternoon Of that day
Thi- Csll is made for the purpose II requiring
the record Of the proceedings OF the Board "
Directors and tho transfer books and stock
ledger 20 be produced % the stockholders a, said
meeting Of examining generally into the affairs
~ the company: II considering the adyisabiify
Of elcctiug new president and a new board u
directors in place Of tho present board, and Of
clccting new president and new board Of de
rectors II 10 shall be determined tLag 10 70 u tho
interest OF the company 30 10 DO.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-05-05

The New York World complains Of
Mr.. Fuller bccpuse he has not national
reputation. Neither has Mr. James G..
Carter. VINO seemed 10 be the fayorite Of
the New York oar. Greatness does not
consist in simply living in New Iorl,.
Stdte.
There's where you are misiaken-ot
/ least so far as the belief Of tue average
New YORK elitor is concerned. Who
ever is unknown in New York il ua-
known everywhere. No hGrhor or river
in any othe- than the Expire Sta'e, o.
ono OF It's near ncighbor5, is entitled to
an appropriation from Congress. Even
the Mississippi river is q shallow creek.
In a word proyincialism is tho most
marked Characteristic oi New Yorker.
lie is Cosmopolitan ou!y in his absolute
Indifference to what the world says or
does.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-05-05

MOBISON'S (RNcLISN Pills
4fA for Sick Hsaaa,he. Bil0ut8ess. lrfiss.
ton, and all ki0noy ana BLADDER bfsrr.e..
Price 81 per SCI, deliveries.
W. = PITCHER. Agent
my 5.I Gl7 vest brf. 100
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-05-05

An letters mi ,eierrsr,s must no addressed
hTHE DISPATCH COMPANY.
Rejected communications viii not be 10
fUrnei.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-05-05

A REGULAR MEETING OF THE
"A CLAY WARD STANDBYs will oe hold
SATURDAY NIGHT, May o. 1855. ~ Daris's Han.
II "a hoped that all mo members will be present,
and members of other clubs arc cordially in
vttod fny III
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-05-05
hDvFrTii1VG RATES
RAE INCH or LgsS

Reading notices IN Refrigeration typH .
gnes or less 81 ia uonparon loaded. 30
Gard Of rates iog more space iuTnshcd on ap-
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-05-05

II. b. HOLLfNS & Co,
WILLIAM LtBBGY.
+. }. GOODHART q CO.,
BLUM q ST. GOAR,
HALLGAkIEN & CO.,
FRED. TAYLOR Z CO.,
+. ". CLARK,
II. l. NICHOLAS,
ISAAC Z. RICE,
KCHN, POTPER 6 CO..
II. DURAND.
!. l.. CARROLL,
J. 3. NENCOMBE & CO,
ii. 4. GOLDsCHMIDT /. CO.,
DE NEUFNILLE & CO..
JAMES VI. LEOPOLD j. CO.,
ROLLSTON & BASS.
G. SCHUMACHER K CO.,
RUDOLPH KEPPLER,
Calm a CO.,
"a GEORGE G.. WILDE.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14
HOUSEHOLD

HOMEMADE cream cheeses are dell.
cious and very easily made. and are the
incest of cheeses for the end of q dinner
party. Two breakfast cupsful Of pure
cream make q pretty little cheese for a
party of six. Mix two t~easpoonsful of
salt with this cream, stir it well and
then pour the cIeam into a china slop
bowl, in which a clean piece of soft
linen has been laid. When the cream
has thus been turned into the cloth
draw the ends of the cloth together,
holding the cream as it were in a bag,
tie it tightly with a string, aad hang the
bag In a cool place to drip; when the
dripping Of moisture from the bag
ceases, the cheese is ready; take the bag
down, turn the contents out into a
clean splint basket of the size and shape
you wish to have your cheese. Choose
your basket as you would a pretty
plate, only it Is of the cheapest kind.
Press the cheese into this and hang it
up, it will get air enough through the
splints to dry it in a day or two, when
you can serve. Ii you mix it with pow
dered sage you will have an excellent
Dutch cheese-that IA be left to hang
longer. Shape it either in a neat square
or any form you please, and serve it on
q dish garnished with green leaves.
Let it stand In the icebox until ready
for use.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

The celebrated authoress, so highly es-
teemed by the women of America, says on
pages 1903 and AS of her popular work
"Ere's Daughters; or, Common Sense for
Maid. WIFE and Mother"
'For the aching back-should 1t be slow
in recovering its normal strengthen L
COCKS Porous PLASTER is an excellent
comforter, combining the sensation OF the
sustained pressure of a strong warm hand
with certain tonic qualities developed in
the wearing. 1t should be kept over the
seat of uneasiness for several days-in OBJ
stinate cases, for perhaps a fortnight"
"For pain in the back wear an ALLcocK's
Porous PLASTER constantly, renewing as
it wears of. This is an invaluable support
when the weight on the small of the back
becomes heavy and the aching incessant.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

GRAPES IN FEvER.-Dr. Harrison of
Cannes recommends grapes as a valua-
BILE diet in fever. The grapes contain
a considerable amount of h~ydro-carbon-
aceous matter, together with a certain
quantity of potassium salts, a combina-
ton which does not lrritate, but, on
the contrary, soothes the stomach, and
consequently is used with advantage,
even In dyspepsia. While considering
the carbohydrates contained IN the
grape, we must not neglect the organic
acids, particularly tartaric acid. DR..
Harrison thinks the nourishing influen-
ceS of these acids too much neglected.
1t is indeed known that they are
changed to carbonic acid in the blood,
and are excreted as carbonates in the
urine. Possibly careful research might
show that, under some circumstances,
the organic acids are changed to fats.
DR.. Harrison believes that the organic
acids should be ranked with the carbo-
hydrates as foods. When fresh grapes
are not to be had, raisins or diluted
wine might be used.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

Further Investigations have been
made by DR.. Victor C.. Vaughan, Of
Michigan University, into the develop
ment of tyrotOxicon, the poison which
he has detected as a product of decom.
posing milk, and he recommends a
number of precautions to prevent its
being developed. Milk, he says. should
be cooled down to a temperature Of
sixty degrees Fahrenheit within an
hour after IL IS taken from the COW;
and it should be kept only in tin, glass
or porcelain vessels. T~yrotoxlcon, we
are told. has been found not only in
milk and cheese, but also in ice cream
and oysters.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14
New Anecdotes or Gen. Grant

When Gen. Grant was about to retire
from the command of the army. said
Capt. John S. Loud in conversation a
few days ago, he made a farewell tour
among the posts and outlaying military
stations of the west. l was assistant
acting adjutant general in the district
of New Mexico at the time, and it was
with Gen. Hatch and myself that he
and Mrs. Grant made a flying trip with
one car and an engine from Santa Fe to
Trinidad. We were fairly flying along
the road when the glasses began to fall
off the ice cooler.
Then Mrs. Grant began to get
nervous,
"Keep calm, julia" said the general
in his usual collected manner, "there is
no danger as long as the car stays on
the track"
ITS all very well to talk, general"
said Mrs. Grant, perhaps If 1 could
smoke as you do 1 might have some
nerve, too"
The only thing Gen. Grant dreaded
was the appearance of delegations and
committeeman at the stopping places
on the route.
Anything at the next station?, he
would inquire.
Eyes, general, there's a crowd wait
ing TO see YOU"
Then he would look grave for q mo-
ment before asking:
'Could you forget to stop there"
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

MILKwEED PoMPoNs.-These are
not quite as easily made, but are amore
silky and nearer pure white than the
thistle. When the milkweed pods are
ripe, make a collection Of them and
they can be kept half a year OF more
before the pompons are made. if SO de-
sired, or the puff balls can be made at
once, as follows: Lave some very fine
wire, such as is used for bead work,
and cut it into pieces four inches long.
Dip the pod in water, and then open 1t.
1t will be found filled with many bun
dies of web-like white fiber. Pull off
several of these and wrap the wire
around the ends which were attached
to the center stem. Brush off the black
seeds adhering to the other ends. Wire
a number of these bundles. as just des-
cribed, then with another piece of wire
to wind round and round, put them to.
gether as you would a boquet of low-
ers, thus making a rounded pompon.
City florists have these colored a DELI
cate pink, and they are extremely love-
lV-
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

When the question has to be met as to
what is the best course 10 adopt to secure a
sure, safe and agreeable remedy for those
organic diseases and weaknesses which
aff1ict the female sex, there Is but n wise
decision, viz, a course of self-treatment
with Dr.. Pierce's Favorite Prescription.
1t is an unfailing specific for periodical
pains, displacement, internal infiamma-
ton, I'M all functional disorders that rem
der the lives of SO many women miserable
and joylsss. They who try it, praise it OF
druggists.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14
CUsToMER-Your razor draws kind

CUsToMER-Your z draws kind
of hard this morning, Mr.. Jacksing.
Barber-Yes, sab. l done use it m
Sam Johnsing at the poker party las
night, an 1t amt got back de aige yet.
''Hal Was there ~troublep"
"You list bet dar war trouble. HUH
When Johnsing war called he had five
aces"
"Five acesl There are no five aces
in a pack of cards."
"Guess dar amt. OATS what caused
de trubbel.
"What did you hold?"
"Only five jacks"
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

Miss BEATTY was a remarkably
young and handsome-looking woman
for her years, and she never told any
n how old she was.
Gracious me, Miss Beatty" said an
old acquaintance, admiringly, Zone day,
''how well you keep your agel"
Thanks" she replied, with a smile,
"How do you yer manage to do itp''
"Oh. easy enough; 1 never give it
away"
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

"What makes my skin SO dark and muddy?
My cheeks were once SO smooth and ruddy ?
1 use the best cosmetics made"
Is what a lovely maiden said.
''That's not the cure, my charming Miss"
The doctor said-"remember this:
If you your skin would keep from faint,
Discard the powder and the paint.
'The proper thing for all such ills
Is this" remarked the man OF pills:
Enrich the blood and make 1t pure
In this you'll find the only cure"
DIR. Pierce's Golden Medical Discovery
will do"this without fail. 1t has no equal.
All druggists.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

SIT seems to me-" said a travelling
man to a young lady upon whom ne
was trying to make an impression Una
men nowadays waste too much time
in words. They expiate needlessly on
any subject they may be thinking ABOUT.
That is something I never do. can
tell all l know on any subject INSIDE OF
two minutes" 49,,
Eyes, l should think you couid,'
was the demurely spoken reply.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

CRANBERRIEs.-Put three pints of
washed cranberries in a granite stew
pan. On top Of them put three cups of
graduated sugar and three gills of
water. After they begin to boil cook
them ten minutes, closely covered. and
do not stir them. Remove the scum,
They will jelly when cool, and the skins
will be soft and tender.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

DUBIOUS. - Little Gotham maid
(reading)-And the Fairy Prince and
Blue Eyes were married and lived hap
PLY ever after.
Little Boston maid-Where did they
liveP
Little Gotham maid Consulting the
last page carefully)-It doesn't tell.
Little Boston Maid-That was a Sc
rious omission on the authors part. As
we do not know where the prince and
Blue Eyes Lived, we have no way of
establishing their social status.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

STEAMED RHUBARB.-Wash, peel
and cut the rhubarb into inch pieces,
Put 1t into a granite double boiler, add
one cup of sugar for a pint Of fruit, and
cook till the rhubarb is soft. Do not
stir it. When the rhubarb is very sour
steam it without sugar until the Juice
flows, then drain it, add the sugar and
steam again till the sugar is dissolved.
Or pour boiling water over it and let it
stand five minutes, then drain and
steam,
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

A YOUNG sportsman on horseback
hurriedly enters a meadow and accosts
a farmers boy:
''Say. boy. have you seen a deer pass
this way? You know what a deer is
llkeP"
@No, 1 DON'T"
"Why, something like a donkey with
short ears, Have you seen anything
answering to that description"
mo, not till you came by"
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

RETRIBUTIoN.-Mr. Kidby Nupop
Ito u%nsuspecting friend, who has invi-
ted him to assuage his thirst)-l tell
you, Smith, that boy of mine is a re-
markable little fellow for three years
old. The other day he said to me-
HI, there, SMITH Where's he gomez }
say, bartender, this check amt mine.
That gentleman that just went out in
vited mel don't know why he
Bartender Ito bouncer OF the estab
lishment)-Jimmy back up de door.
Two drinks. twenty-five cents. Thank
you, sir.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

QUEEN ANNE's CAKE.-Two pounds
Of -four, one pound of sugar, one pound
Of butter. three eggs, one teaspoonful
of cinnamon, a wine glass of rose
water. Beat butter and sugar together,
whisk the eggs and add them, then the
-four, cinnamon and rose water. Roll
out the dough thin. cut into diamonds
and stick the top full OF sweet almonds
blanched and cut in halr. Bake In tins
in a moderate oven.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

A CHILD who has a morbid propen-
sity to force buttons, beans, ETC., into
his nostriIs keeps his whole family in a
state bordering upon terror, for they
never know at what precise moment
they may be called upon to perform
upon Master Harry's nasal a~ppendage.
Pressure against the empty nostril and
quick, strong preaching into the open
mouth will dislodge the foreign sub.
stance and send the suffering youngster
upon his way rejoicing.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

EDITOR ito assistant)-In this obit-
uary notice, Mr.. Getaroundlate, you
say his many friends will shed a tear.
Shed a tear is a trifle weak.
Assistant-How would shed a tear
or two, answer?
Editor (dubiously)-That's not much
of an improvement.
Assistant-Well, make it his many
friends will shed two or three tears,
then.
Editor--Al right, let it 60 at that.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

If anyone does you a favor or gives
you a present, say ''thauk you" in
your prettiest manner. Don't allow
yourself to fall into the wretched habit
of saying ''thanks" or keeping quiet.
The effect of the sighting word upon
the feelings of the person to whom you
are indebted is very much. Why, an
obligation is almost cancelled by a
graceful acknowledgment, and no one
should be SO ungracious as to be want
ing n politeness in this particular. 1t
is expected of you to set the example.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

Tie barramanda proves to be a con-
Meeting link of primary rank between
the Oldest surviving group OF fishes and
the lowest air breathing animals like
the frogs and salamanders, 1t leaves
its native streams at night and sets out
on a foraging expedition after vege-
table food in the neighboring wood
lands. 1t has both lungs and aills. It
can breathe either air or water at will,
or, if it chooses, the two together.
Though covered with scales and most
fish like in outline. it presents points of
anatomical resemblance both to sala-
manders and lizards, and Is a connect
ing bond between North American
ash on one hand and the wonderful
l~epidosiren OF the other.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

A NICE way to serve tomatoes is to
stew them thoroughly, and they are
improved by a slow and gentle simmer
ing, as much as any other vegetable.
Season with butter, pepper and salt,
and a little sugar. Line the dish in
which they are to be poured with thin
slices of nicely Drowned toast.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

FRIED tomatoes are a luxury; peel
the tomatoes, cut IN slices about half
an inch thick, dip each slice into white
flour, then into beaten egg, sprinkle
pepper and salt w each slice, and fry
in hot lard. These make a good gar
nish,
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

GRAPE BUTTER.-Stew the grapes
and squeeze out each pulp from the
skin, removing the seeds; keep the skins
In a small thin bag; to each pound of
pulp allow n pound of sugar, half
pint of hard cider, t~easpoonful of cloves
one of cinnamon and one of nutmeg,
boil this very slowly. putting into the
bag OF skins tied securely; when it jel-
lies by dropping in cold water it is done.
Put away in jars; for an ornamental
dish it car be heated oyer and put into
moulds to jelly.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

GRAPE PRESERVES. - Pick grapes
from the stem, skin and put them in a
kettle, cook until the seeds are loose.
then strain, weigh with the skins, and
to every pound allow a pound of sugar.
Put the grapes in a kettle, when boil.
ing add the sugar and cook slowly till
done.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14
DON'T SUFFER PAIN!

Put on a Deane's Rheumatic
Piaster-Your Druggist keeps
them-if he don't, send us n
cents in stamps and we will
send you one sample free. (OnIy
one sample sent to one address,
as the regular price is rs cents.
These plasters are recon-
mended by all good physicians,
and are used in the largest
Hospitals in America.
For Rheumatism, Neuralgia,
Pleurisy, Pains in Lungs, Chest,
Back. Kidneys, Liver or Stom-
arch they take hold at once and
cure effectuaIIy. Full directions
on everv Plaster. Be sure and
get
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

"Yes, 1 had a very narrow escape" said
a prominent citizen to o friend. l was
confined 10 my bed for a year ana my
friends gave me up for a consumptiVes
grave, until 1 began using Kemp's Balsam
for the Throat and Lungs, and here l am
sound and hearty" You will find 1t ior
sale by all druggists. Price 6oc and o.
SdMple BOTTLE Eree,
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

"MY FRIEND" he said, 81 trust that
you abomlnate liquor?"
"No, sir" replied his friend, I'm
in the business. | sell it,"
. "Why don't you give up such an &C
cursed business and engage in some
thing b~etter?"
"Wha-a-t! Give up the liquor busl-
ness just on the v of a presidential
electionP Say, old man, dye think Pm
crazyp"
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14
Editor-An right, let it 60 at that.

POLICE JUDGE - Prisoner, you are
charged with having brutally assaulted
this man.
81 admit it, your Honor, but there
were extenuating circumstances"
"Of what nature?"
why, this man asked me II q men
and a half laid an egg and a half In a
day and d half, how many"
'That Will do. You are discharged"
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

"LET me see," unused Sqnildig,
didn't Caesar conquer the Germans,
the Gauls, the BrItalns and the Huns?"
81 believe he did," replied McSwill-
iger, "Why do you askp"
sit occurred to me that it was the
only occasion on which one king beat
four races"
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

That tired feeling, so subtle and yet so over
towering, is entirely overcome by Hoods Sarsa-
parilla, which tones and strengthens the system
and gives a good appetite. Be sure 10 get Hoods
sarsaparilla 400 Doses One Dollar Is true only
of this peculiar medicine.
The Penn's Grove record., 1888-07-14

BOBBY docking out of the window
What's the matter with that horse,
mamma?
Mother-The horse is balky. Bobby;
he won't obey his driver.
Bobby-Well, what's the mar pat
ting him for?
Mother-He is coaxing him.
Bobby with an injured air)-That
amt the way you treat me when Pm
balky.