The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1888-03-10
THE ODD-LOOKING MAN.

THE ODD-L0OKING MAN.
From London Belgrdcid.
1t is just thirty years to-day since We
were all seated at the table d'hote of a
fashionable hotel in Venice We, mean
my father, mother, sister and self The
two former are long since departed this life.
My sister, a young lady travelling for edu-
cational purposes, Or, as old John Dickens
would have said "To consolidate her
modern languages and music is now a
wife and mother. had just finished my
term at Oxford, and, as we all fancied we
should benefit by change Of air and scene,
we set out for twelve months Continental
tour. In due season we reached Venice,
where overheard the remark which sug-
gested the heading of the present article
Our vis-a-vis was an English clergyman
with his family, whom we then met for the
first time on our travels. The eldest daugh-
ter, glancing steadily at her opposite neigh
Dor, and with difficulty repressing smile,
whispered audibly enough in her fathers
ear: "What strange-looking man that
is facing u.s." Hereupon paterfamilias,
putting his quizzing glass to his eye and
staring deliberately at the object of the re-
mark, exclaimed emphatically, "He is in
deed an odd-looking fellowl"
The victim of these unfattering obser-
vations was myself. l have always been
what cockney would call, "a rum un to
look at" Perhaps no other definition
would suit me as well am not, strictly
speaking, "The Ugly Man." neither am |
''The Lean Man" "The Fat Man" ''The
Short Man." or ''The Tall Man" My
features, individually, are neither plain nor
unpreposessing. Yet the ensemble-ah !
there is the rub There is a screw loose
somewhere.
Figuratively, the shoe pinches. But
had my misfortunes been confined to a
general peculiarity of appearance, | should
certainly have kept my own counsel, and,
so to speak, consumed my own smoke with
the pipe of philosopher. But it was far
more than this. Hereditary predisposition
had bequeathed to me threefold idiosyn-
Grassy. Speech, person and nervous organ
ization were alike out Of tune. The early
consciousness of these failings rendered me,
from childhood, shy and sensitive to a
degree which more healthilY constituted
persons could scarcely oven imagine; as |
grew to boyhood and youth these feelings
became more intensified, and when | had
reached my eighteenth year was literally
unable to frequent places of public resort
and amusement, or even to enjoy quiet
daily walk, without undergoing positive
torture. My friends failed not to misjudge
me, and they all attributed to me, most un-
Justly, morose and misanthropical dispo-
sition l was thus, by sort of fatality,
deprived of the natural sympathies and
counsel of those who were nearest and
dearest to me- In due season my school
days, which had been hourly torture to me,
whether in classroom or playground, came
to an end. Impelled by natural ambition,
and complying with the wishes of my par
ents, boldly resolved to risk the ordeal of
university life, with faint hope-heaven
save the mark -of. eventually embracing
the clerical profession. So l entered my
name at a college, and in due time pre-
sented myself for matriculation. Alas
my amour propEe was destined, at the out
set to be r1dely shaken. CHANGING to en-
counter, beneath the gateway of my col
lege, a merry group of my fellow-gownsmen,
one of them, eyeing me askance, auaibly
expressed hope that i'that odd-looking
fellow didn't intend to come there" This
was no Aattering welcome on the part of
Alma Mater to one SO sentitive and self
conscious as myself
But worse still was to follow While
undergoing the preliminary examination In
the college hall--of which, in point of
scholarship, had little to dread-one Of
my fellow freshmen remarked to his neigh
bor: ::'Good heavens! Did you ever see
such phiE?" This plunged the iron more
deeply still into my sore and stricken soul.
1t capped the climax, as it were. Within
less than a week / was forced to leave my
college and renounce all the fond and vain
hopes which my friends and myself had
built on my university career.
now became desperate and threw my
self into various forms of solitary and un-
social dissipation. Having inherited from
distant relative small legacy to enable
me to follow some liberal career, squand-
cred away the whole capital on attaining
my majority with insane recklessness.
Having thus reduced myself to the condi-
ton Of q peBRiless pFGaigal, | gratefully
accepted the offer OF accompany my family
abroad.
Byron tells US that foreign travel is the
strongest mental stimulus next to ambition.
Notwithstanding my repeated failures and
disappointments, now clung to this last
forlorn hope of ridding myself, by strong
effort, seconded by the influence of novel
and striking scenes, of the incubus of self
consciousness. I endeavored to counteract
my personal Deficiencies by adopting various
modes of dress, which 1 fancied most suita-
BILE for the purpose, regardless of fashion or
expense, SO long as | still had the family
purse to resort to. | studied my imperfect
enunciation for hours together, in my room,
and before my glass, fancying comedian
preparing for his debut, or an N. 7 re-
hearsing his maiden speech. To combat
my shyness, / consulted an experienced
medical practitioner, to whom fully de-
scribed my abnormal symptoms, and who
recommended me to try colored spectacles.
For what added to my confusion was the
fact whenever people chanced to look at me
the nervous twitchings and scared express
sion of my eyes naturally attracted their
attention, and caused them to stare the