Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1888-08-26
A FAMILY PICNIC.

| 'GOOO DeaVe1lSI Julla ELLaCctu, never
mention anything of that sort to me, u
and after that one ebulGtion Of wrath,
settled back in my chair and serenely
| perused the evening papers. Serenely,
say; well l appeared to be in perfectly
undisturbed state of mind, but any fair
| minded reader who can well understand
| the-well the environment-will at once
| perceive that saint couldn't stand such
| a suggestion, and never even pretended
| to be one, though know l am as good as
| the average man
| 1t was little rough on my wife, I'll
| admit, and suppose l shall make it up
| to her in some way, but I'll be drawn into
any kind of extravaganza, take trip to
| Japan, go into the wilds of Africa, do
anything, before I'll ever again submit to
the torturous experiences of family
! picnic" and I'm q man Of spirit when I'm
aroused.
You occasionally find one who is led
| around by his wife and her relations, but
Pm not the individual
Perhaps you do not understand. but
when things are too exasperating Irelieve
my mind by sharing my experience with
sympathy.
J,
of great excitement call her by her full
naTe-left the room Immediately after l
refused the invitation that had come from
her mother and sisters and cousins, ETC.,
to join them in their annual outing
A few years ago, | remember, it was
really pleasant affair. We used to sail
up the river land on an island for dinner,
sail farther up stream, go ashore, wander
NV
moonlight; but last years experience was
more than mortal man can endure and in
seraphic way hear the internal kind of
affair again mentioned
Why, We started, as they all do. with
baskets and bundles, gossamers and UNI
brellas, wife and children piled into the
coach that took us to the wharf. where we
embarked on the little steamer that has
taken the place of the boats we used in
former days.
managed to keep the boys near mo
most Of the time, so the voyage was COM
paratively uneventful. though Alph sue
ceeded in putting his feet ON one OF the
baskets, thereby demolishing the custard
pies that occupied the top for safety q
and Del overturned milk can that | had
carelessly placed beside the basket; but
those were minor matters.
The first hour things went on pretty
smoothly. A few went fishing for fish
they didn't catch; the girls-1 mean my
wife's young sisters-with some half
dozen cousins and friends, augled too, not
all with the same kind of bait, however,
and | noticed not for the same kind of
fish, but they angled-
Now time was when l could catch q fish
every time threw fly, and I'll leave it
to any other fellow to say if it isn't about
as fascinating sport as q man ever eX-
periences, especially when he is the sue
cessful one of the crowd. This time,
however, though Mary's husband, my
brother in-law, was one OF them, and
cousin Helen and jim, with Julia in the
boat with them, rowed away to the
shadiest nook they could find, they seemed
to consider me in the light Of a nurse
maid. for Mother -in-law Spiller said, "Of
course you'll go, Julia; get right into the
boat. You've had caro- enough OF those
children, and John and l will see to them
today and let you have a day Of rest"
What could | do but insist upon it, too?
did really wish the dear girl to have an
ENJOYABLE time, but the--well. never mind
what proposed to say-Im not growler
like some men; | never was, but suffice it
to say, Julia went, and I was glad of it,
of course.
Her mother, with few other elderly
ladies, stayed to arrange the lunch, that
appeared to them to be the chief attrac-
ton. Uncle Ben devoted himself to the
boys for short time, but Mothcr-in- law
Spiller soon called him to squeeze the
lemons and prepare the kindlings and
wood they would need for the fry" and
sundry other things that always fall to
his lot. Somebody, you know, has to be
general utility n1n on such occasions, and
Uncle Ben fortunately for the rest, was
always the one When l was moro of a
youngster, used TO pity him, but since
I'm paterfamilias of several years stand
ing | imagine the sly twinkle Of his eye
means more than l once suspected, and
my sympathy turns to admiration and
envy.
John, look sharp after the boys!'
called out Mrs. Spiller.
Alph was Juggling at my coat sleeve,
and Del had both hands in one of my
pockets. bat l remarked pleasantly, III
keep them in sight"
It wasn't long before Al;1h was punch
ing Del, and Del was striking out in a
forcible If not scientific way. 1t took con-
siderable muscle TO separate the young
beligerents, but that wasn't all. Their
grandmother saw the performance, and
expressed her disapproyal by saying in
her NEST dignifed way, "a man who can
not control his own temper is not fit TO be
father" and then with lachryml glands
in working order, added, Thank heaven,
Julia did not witness this scene"
| most ANONYMOUSLY retTeated-that
IS. did not utter enc word. | merely
picked up the two urehins, and went On
al exploring tour.
rolled on the g-xss and let them crawl
over ne. Iplayed leap freq" and "hot
oven" with them. l barred ny feet and
waded out as far as the water was shall
low, carrying one on my back while / led
the other through the stream, snd 10 cap
the whole l made one nnisstep and went
headloIg into the water.
The boy on my back bounced Of, and
the other one tumbied down and chung to
Ay heels. Mynese struck snag or some
thing, and blood poured from II most pro-
fuselv Il did alnos: break nv heart TO
kick at the little fellow behind. when I
did not know how soon he might be
strangiing and struggling. even dying. ii
the treacherous stream. but | knew the
boy In from, was In deeper water. and
must be rescued Il was an indescriba-
bic. but never 70 be forgotten scene
Could the Spiuer family have realized nv
anguish they would never again douh.
my love for my offspring Suffice it TO
say rescued them and resuscitated them
before any of the party were aware of the
mishap.
1t did really fishten the BOYS. and