The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1888-07-14
BRIGHT BITS


A SOUTHERN POET has written some lines and
dedicated them to n lottery ticket We take
it that they are written in blank verse YO1tk-
ers statesman.
FRIEND ito author)-Do you skeletonize your
noyelsy
Authorize. simply go on and write the
story without making any bones of 1.-THE
Idea.
- AN on my way home, doctor said citi-
zen, who was after some free advice and am
tired and worn out What shall ! take ~
Take a cab, replied the intelligent physician.
-Nelo York Sun.
HER PARENT-Do you think Mr.. Filkins, that
you can support my daughter in the style to
which she is accustomed
Bright Dung Mani think | could il you
would let us board with you
The only man who was ever known to keep a
cash account of his private expenses straight
for year died the year afterwards, and the
doctors said his death was caused by mental
overwork. -JOuInH Of Education.
Mrs. PARKs-Good gracious, Henry, what am
| to do: | can't 60 to the concert to night.
Somebody has s. olen my hustle!
Mr.. Parks Gndistinctly, with his mouth full of
lather)-Take the bird cage. Burlington Free
Press.
TEAcHrR-The basis Of society, my boys, is
the family. But what is the basis of -
Tommy (raising his handl-Oi know, sor! OF
may not be quot roight, but OF think the bay
sis av the family is me red-headed sisthur.-
Judge
Mrs EsMoND (of Boston)-Why, Violet, here's
a real female Indian. Offer the poor thing some
of the lunch
Howlng water--No want grub; white
sqIaw got any chew tobacco in her blanket
Judge
HUsBAND-It ever catch you flirting, shall
first kill you, then the destroyer of my domes
tic happiness, after which I'll commit suicide.
Wfe-Why don't you reverse the order of
your crimes and commit suicide tirst.-IerdS
SiftiRgs.
SPIRITUALIsTIc sEANcE at the summer hotel
Ghost 0oquitorl-Who speaks to me
Jlnks-john Jinks. summering at the. Isle Of
Shoals Who are you?
Ghost-John Smith simmering at the Oil of
Sheol.-The Idea.
THAT young.Dr. Sawbones, remarked Dunn
ley, lis about the closest chap / ever met. |
never knew him to give up anything"
i've known him to give up lots of patients, "
asserted FeatheTly, with howl of laughter
brakes Magazine
JACoB LEVI, JR.-Baba wants den cents
Jacob Levi, Sr-Vat for, mine son?
Jacob Levi, Jr-I wants to puy a tog.
Jacob Levi, Sr.-Mine son, gifts you den cents
ofe you will puy baseball. Rememper, mine
son, a tog eats Exchange.
WIFE tretrospectively)-"I can remember so
well, John, how fond you and my first husband
were of each other You were boys together
and your friendship lasted TO the end"
Husband (sadly)-"Ah, yes, poor fellow his
death has been a sad blow to meH'-Hdrper's
Bazaar.
MISS PENELOPE (of Boston, who is visiting her
uncle James in Nermont) For the past month
uncle, have been taking course of TolstOl;
found it so strengthening.
Uncli James Huh! Tell yer aunt to give yer
dose of pennyrayal tea afore goin' TO bed
Penelopy. Ding these new tangled remidies =
Hdrper'S Bdzdr
"DoN'T Won have a mirror in the pantry?"
asked Jenkins of his boarding mistress, at the
table yesterday morning.
Mirror For goodness sake What for2"
exclaimed the good woman.
For the butter to comb its hair by" an
swered the cruel jenkins, as he strove to find
the parting place on his ump.-The idea