The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1888-09-14

against the next washday linen the differ
ence between soft water and hard was known
to everybody. Elton's Comic Almanac,
the Puck of the time, would say every
year that it was singular that when 1t
ralned hard the water was soft, and the
joke always gained hearty laugh. 1t is
now laid away it'll its kith and kin, except
when its spirit is perturbed by some remin-
lscent writer. 1t was feature of practical
Joking TO put pump water into washbasln
and watch the disgust of a fellow trying to
produce lather. Curious people who want
to see pump of the good old times and
take draught of its nectar can do SO to-
day by going to the corner of Cedar street.
and Trinity place. There is one in Church
street, some i'll Greenwich, and perhaps
score lower down about town. The famous
tea-water pump, on the corner of Green
witch and Dey street, quenches the thirst OF
over 800 horses every day.
The milk wagons of to-day are about the
only things that have come down from the
forties without change. Perhaps IL isn't
fair to speak about milk at the same time
that remarks are being made about pumps,
which, by the way, is a reminder of a sar-
castle squib that annually appeared in
Elton's Comic Almanac about milkmaid's
soiree, where all the participants wore
pumps. On the east side of the city a
milkman named Cook had several
wagons and much custom trade. On
the back of the drivers seat be
had in gold letters the legend, Cows
Milk which to many was at least assur-
ing. He once caught Jim Adams, the fore
man of Jefferson Fire Engine Company No.
26, that lay in Madison street, near
Rutgers, and whose yard abutted on Bill
Tweed's of the latter street.-the once caught
Jim fagrdnte delicttt, changing the initial
Lot to Rnt hmm in
street fight, and if the ubiquitous high
constable, ''Old Hayes" hadn't happened
along one of them would have been soundly
thrashed Jim went one way to play water
upon fires and Cook returned to his milk
route
1t seems strange that they had fresh fish
in the days of auld lang syne. It's hard
even in these days Of ice in abundance and
refrigerators to Keep them in condition. At
Catharine market they were kept in floats
or cars, and were sold alive. There wasn't
much display on the stands. Now it's
treat to the eye to look at the fish show in
Fulton ma rket. Look at Blackford's, for
instance. Among the ornaments of the
wide marble slab are squares of
ice with vari-colored paper inlaid
to produce a pretty effect. And
the fish are laid out with the same
regard, on one end the princely Spanish
mackerel that look like bits of rainbow as
they are pulled from the deep sea, aud then
a boiled lobster, its red contrasting with the
sombre black bass, and there a Hudson
river salmon, here bluet1sh, and then few
silvery pompano and now patch of
Charleston prawn, next a mess of weakfsh,
and then cells to separate the sections of de-
licious sea food, Chopped ice keeps all com
Portable and sweet, and the frogs legs,
white as chicken breast and far more ten
der, and the paper-shell CLANS, so sensitive
to the summers heat, keep just as we'll as
the chunks of swordfish or the cardinal red
steaks of ALBANY beefn
Abraham Lincoln'S remains were de-
spoiled of their naturalness by a crude pro-
cess of embalming. Gen. Grants features
were swollen and distorted when on exhibit
ton in our city hall, and the same results
seem to come from this science of preSer-
walton of the deadn wherever practiced.
Lincoln looked if his skin had been tanned
black, and the excuse was that all who are
shot to death look that way. 1t seems a
pity that the hundreds of thousands who
had glance at the immortal Lincoln in his
casket should have been shocked by what
they saw. Ice is the best preserver, after
all. 1t leaves color in the face,
and restores the appearance of health
even where sickness resulted in emacia-
ton. Some people object to ice
upon the ground that if the dead be not
dead but merely in trance the ice would
kill them surely. To be sure, if in trance
the ice would settle the whole business, but.
frances are like miracles. They have
occurred, but don't occur any more. There
was widespread, impressive and painful
rumor many years ago that the body of
distinguished politician, who died in his
bathtub, had been found turned over in the
coffin when his relatives were about to take
his remains from the receiving vault of
Greenwood for burial. 1t was not verified,
and is now pinned up alongside of the
legend that a body of a man that looked
just like him was, for consideration, fur
nshed to the relatives of John G. Colt, the
murderer of Adams, the printer, and put
into his cell by bribed keepers and passed
off as that of the suicide and homicide who
had escaped.
Indians will eat ice cream if they have it
until they can't walk Dolly Madison
asked chief of a delegation who was din
ing with her and the President at the white
house, and who seemed to favor that dish,
il he wouldn't like some more. His reply
was characteristic, if not strictly polite:
"Me pretty blank full now, but me stand
up and try" A noted physician received a
nice compliment from little 4-year-old!!
patient. ''You are a splendid DOCTOR"
She lisped. THE best doctor l ever
heard Of" continued the little
invalid "And why do you
speak so nicely of me, my little darling?"
eagerly asked the flattered physician. oh!
because you ordered ice cream for me, was
the ingenious reply. "Begorra, sir, you
have no aqual as a doctor in the broad
land,n said a grateful Lrishman when the
physicion prescribed whisky. Ice cream
affords many text for squibs to the hui
morist, and hardly day passes that one OF
them doesn't appear. 1t isn't known who
first discovered that the oyster was edible,
or who ventured to drink the first cup of
coffee, or who invented ice cream. But they
were worthless and here's to them. There's
half million invested in the ice cream business
and it's growing trade. Just think Of it;
one can send a postal card for pint of ice
cream to be left at his residence at certain
hour. and it will be delivered. This is an
accommodation and leads to frequent or
ders and large ones 1t is estimated that
1000, 900 quarts are eaten in this little town
on a sultry Sunday. 1t was Tom Hood or
Theodore Hook who thought of doting his
flesh and sitting in his bones when the Their
mometer was 90 in the shade. But think
of wading with linen bathing suit few
minutes into pyramid of 1,00O, 900 quarts
of vanilla ice cream and being obliged to
cat ouff