Butte semi-weekly miner. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1886-1890, 1888-03-14
A MASON OF MANY DEGREES.
Nice Old Lady Inquiries About Her Hus-
bands Masonic Responsibilities,

, A Nice Old Lady Inquiries About Her HUI
bands Masonic Responsibilities,
The middle-aged lady with the blac
alpaca dress, worn shiny at the elbows
, and cheap shawl and a cheap bonnet
and her hands all puckered up and blue, d
though she had just got her washing out
went into the Office of prominent Masol
few days ago, and took a chair. So
Wiped her nose and the perspiration froo
her face on blue checkered apron, anC
when the Mason looked at her with an in
terested, brotherly look. as though she wal
troubled and said:
Are you the boss Mason?" s
He blushed, told her he was a Mason
but not the highest in the land She hesi
tated moment, fingered the corner of hel
apron and curled it up like boy speaFiz,
| a piece in school, and asked:
| Have you taken the whole 233 degrees
| of Masonry"
The man assured her that there were
only thirty-three degrees, and that he haC
only taken thirty-two. The other degree
could only be taken by few who were
recommended to the Grand Body. The
lady studied a minute, unpinned the safety
pin that fastened her shawl together and
put it in her mouth, drew a long breath
and said:
"Where does my husband get the two
| hundred degrees. then?"
The prominent Mason said he guessed
| her husband never got two hundred degrees
] unless he had degree factory. He said he
didn't understand the lady.
docs my husband have to sit up with a
corpse three nights in q week?' she asked,
her eyes flashing fire. "Do you keep a lot
of sick Masons on tap for my husband to
sit up with the other three nights?"
The prominent Mason said he was thank
full that few Masons died, and only occa-
sionally one was sick enough to call for
Masonic assistance. When a Mason took
sick away from home, or when his family
desired it, the brethren were only too glad
to sit up with him; but there was so many
Masons and so few sick that it was only
once in two or three months that a brother
was called upon to sit up with any body.
But why do you ask these questions,
madam" said the prominent Mason.
The woman picked the fringe off her
shawl, hung her head down and said:
"Well my husband began to join the
MasOns about two years ago, and he has
been taking degrees or sitting up with peO-
pie ever since, and he comes home at all
hours of the night, smelling OF beer aid
cheese. | thought at first the cheese was
the result OF going to the mOrgue to help
carry brother Masons home after they had
been found in the river. He has come home
twice with the wrong pair OF drawers on,
and when l asked him how it was he said
it was a secret he could not reveal under
penalty of being shot with q cannon! All
he would say was that he took degree. |
have kept little track of it, and | figure
that he has taken 233 degrees, including
the Grand High Mucka Muck degree, which
he took the night he came in with his lip
cut and his ear hanging by piece OF skin"
"Oh, madam, said the prominent Mason,
there's no High Mucka Muck degree in
Masonry; your husband has lied to you.'
That's what Think" said she, as a
paleful light appeared in her eye. He
said that he was taking the High Mucka
Muck degree and fell through the skylight.
had him sewed up and he was ready for
more degrees. After he had taken, should
think, about hundred and fifty degrees. |
told him | should think he would let up on
it, and put some potatoes in the cellar for
winter; but he said that when a man once
got started he had to take them all in, or
he didn't amount to anything. One time ]
wanted new hat to wear to church with
a feather on, and he said feathers were all
nonsense, and the next day he brought
home a lea ather case with felt coal scuttle
in it, and feather on 1T that couldn t
have cost less than SO, the way that |
figure millinery. and when he put it on l
laughed at his ridiculous appearance he
began to throw his arms around, and |
asked him what was the matter and he
said that was the grand hailing sign OF dis
tress and if | didn't look out an Aveng"r
would appear from dark closet and run a
toad sticker through me for a Fcoffer. he
must have spent fortune on the last $50
degrees.
Que morning he came home with his
coat-teils split right up the back, and his
pants torn just az though a dog had
chewed them, and one eye closed up and Il
wad OF hair pulled right out OF his head,
ana he said he had been taking the two
hundradth degree but lie wouldn't tell how
it happened because it was a dead secret.
Some times brother Mason comes home
with him early in the morning, and they
talk q bout full flush, and they act full IS
they stand on the strps and talk about
'pat bands and raising 'em out and call
ing them a boh-tail flush One night,
when he was asleep, | heard hin whisper,
Il raise you $40 and when | asked him
What it meant he said they had been rails
ing a purEe for a poor widow. Another
time he raised up in bed, after be had been
d sleep, and shouted :! stand pat, ana
when | asked him what it meant he said
he was ruined if told it. He said he bad
spoken the password, and if the brethren
heard of it they would put him out OF the
way, even as Morgan was put out OF the
way. Mister, is L stand pat, your pass
word?"
The Mason told her it was not. That
the words he had spoken were an expression
used by men when playing draw poker,
had he added that he didn't believe her
husband was a Mason at all, but he
had heen lying to her all these years.
She sighed and said: "Thats what
thought when he came home with lot OF
ivory chips in his pockets. H. said they
used them at the Lodge to vote on candi-
dates, and that a white chip elects and the
blue rejects caadidate. you will look
the matter up and see if he has joined the
Masons | will be obliged to you. He says
he has taken all the 233 degrees, and now
the boys want him to join the Knights OF
Pythias and Odd Fellows. | want to get
cut n Injunction to prevent him from
Joining anything else until we get some
underclothing for the winter. I'll tell you
what will do The next time he says
about High Mucka Muck degrees
and consiotory nonsense | will ia Ike a wash
board and make him think there is one
degree in Masonry that he has skipped, and
now good d-bve. ."-Scottish Rite Bulletin.