davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1888-03-29
Anti Apoplecti

Is a preparation that has long been in by n
physican of forty years active professional expert
ence, and the claims that made for il haves
thousands of times been verified. 1t has a comb
nation of the most potent remedies known to Med
ical Science for preserving the Fluidity and PU l
RITY of the Blood and the Integrity of the Blood
Vessels, should you suffer from Dizziness Press
nre in Head, Spots before Eyes, Pain around orr
feeling of suffocatIon Ringing Sound in Ears
Numbness or Prickly sensation of Limbs. especi
ally the Arm, Pain between Shoulders and Side
Dry Cough, Flatulence, Sour Stomach, or if suffer
ing from General Debility with Loss OF Appetite
procure bottle of Anti Apoplectine, it not ONLY
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1888-03-29
For Clergynen.

Neatly engraved Marriage Certificates for sale
at this Office Prices, with envelope to match, is
and 20 cents each, according to qnaity. If order
ed by mail, send nothing larger than two-cent
stamps.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1888-03-29

1t is well-knOwn fact that most of the Horse and
Cattle Powder sold in this country is worthless
that Sherdan's Condition Powder is absOlute
pure and very valuable. Nothing On Earth Will
Make Hens Lay like Sheridans Condition Powder
Dose, one teaspOOnful to each pint of food Sold
everywhere. sent by mail for - cts. in stamps.
We furnish it in q lib. cans, price, SI.00 By mail
81 %. Six cans $500, express paid Very valua1
BILE Circulars Free.
L. S. JOHNSON g. Co, BOSTON, MASS.
+ Nor
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1888-03-29

The men to fill their places are not
easily named; they were of a type
worthy of the highest honor in both
church and state.
A Man of ResoIute Spirit.
Rural Vermonter.
In the business affairs of the town
and in local enterprises he was always
interested. To his wise counsels and
liberal spirit the remarkable prosperi-
ty of the town is in measure due.
Some of its most distinguishing insti-
buttons owe their existence to his
broad views of the uses to be made of
the power and opportunities for good
which accompany the possession of
great means. He was modest and I'M
assuming, but behind his unpretend-
ing demeanOr was resolute spirit and
clear mind that displayed their quail
ity in the successful surrounding of
the crises that come to every man and
every business association.
He Was not Found Wanting.
Boston Advertiser.
Reviewing such a life, and having in
mind what it is impossible to put aside
from any thought of him, the business
by which he gained wealth and the
way in which he used that wealth, one
can hardly forbear to suggest, in all
reverence, that the verdict of earth
and heaven must surely be, "Thou art
weighed in the balance and art not
found wanting"
Many Will Feel the Loss.
Vermont Chronicle.
His loss will be deeply felt not only
in his beautiful home, in the town
where he was so we'll known, in the
business firm of which he was the head,
in the state which had honored him
with its confidence, but in those edu-
cational and religious circles where his
benefactions were an encouragement
in seeking the highest intellectual and
religious welfare of the race.
His Fame.
BeIloaUs Falls Times.
His fame is a grand union of good
things. In all things he was a
gentleman, modest and retiring. The
death of snch man is a great public
loss and noble example.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1888-03-29
WEDDING
STATIONERY

We keep full line of the latest novelties in
Wedding Cabinets, Embossed Cards with Plain or
Gilt Beveled Edges, Combination Tied Cards.
Laced Cards, Invitation Cards, Paper, Envelopes,
etc, etc. Call and see samples
AT THIS OFFICE.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1888-03-29
UPHOLSTERENC.

The subscriber is prepared to do all kinds of Up
hoIstering Work, Furniture Repairing, laying car
pets, hanging window Shades, picking over hair
Mattresses and general Furniture Repairs.
n. R. SWITSER.
Opposite Prebyterian church. Eastern Ave. ut
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1888-03-29
Farm for sale or TO Rent.

To a good reliable person, situated two and one
half miles from North Danville village A good
place for an industrious man.
If A. W. HAWKINS.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1888-03-29
/ Cor XIII.

The real life of Horace Fairbanks,
who now rests in God. is given in epit-
ONE in this Scripture, that teaches us
the meaning, the beauty and the use
fulness of love. AS we read of the
power, childlikeness, clairvoyant Wis
ion of charity, we say, here is its liv-
ing epistIe which all men may read and
honor. In him all may see the wis
dom, will and self-forgetfulness of the
life that loves. He thought "no evil"
he rejoiced Sin the TRUTH" and we in
whom he is now more than ever alive
are assured that among all great
things the greatest is Charity"
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1888-03-29
State Normal School, johnson, vt.

The school for teachers. Terms of 20 weeks
each begin the first Tuesday of Sept and the sec
Ond Tuesday of Feb Free scholarship. Send for
catalogue. jul. 20
All. CAMPBELL, A. NJ Principal.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1888-03-29
Many VIII Feel the Loss.
Vpr1Jl01lf Chronicle
His Fame.
BeHoaUs Falls Times.

His fame is a grand union of good
things. In all things he was
gentleman, modest and retiring. The
death of snch man is great public
loss and a noble example.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1888-03-29

Col. J. f. Fox, Burlington Vt. says: For
Dyspepsia and Sick Headache Anti-Apopleetine
has equal.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1888-03-29

The men to fill their places are not
easily named; they were of a type
worthy of the highest honor in both
church and state.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1888-03-29
PREVENTS

ApOplexy, but cures Paralysis, rheumatism, Heart
Disease Angina Pectoris, Chronic Bronchitis, Liv-
Complaint, Kidney and Bladder trouble, Dyspep-
STA, etc. etc.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-02-21
FUNNY MEMS FANCIES.

Every day is grounding day" with
the lover OF sausage.-Syracuse Herald.
The prisoner being asked whether he
struck the man in the heat of passion,
replied: mo, struck him in the pit of
the stomach. 1.-THE Colonel.
Bismarck can wallOp the boots off
OF John Bull, OF Johnny Crapau, or Sig.
MacarOni, or Aleck RomanOff. l can
punish any amount Of Sublime Porte. L
can whip either of 'em or all together.
Let US have peace! Boston Globe.
Husband-Have you heard the pretty
little superstition regarding visits paid
by young ladies to Mrs. Cleveland at
the White house?
Wife-What is it?
Husband-It brings them luck.
Wife-HOW?
Husband-They always get married.
Wife-Ugh! You call that luck, do
youp-Washington Critic.
Tell me, George, do you ever play
pOker?'
proudly, land you can bet it's cold
night when fail to absorb SIS or $40
of some other ones good currency"
"Oh! darling, will you be mine?"-
City Blizzard.
"Isn't it stranger" said Chicago girl,
''they say the car of Russia eats pie
with knife"
81 don't see anything strange about
It," said her young friend from st.
Louis. Then educated Russians have
gone into good society, and they learn
what is proper quickly."-Chicago
Tribune.
Job Lot (who has dropped in to see
how his valentine hit it ff)-Why. what
a beauty! You must have somebody
who thinks the world of 70
Miss Violet SapOlio-There's no doubt
of it. A pawn ticket for S. stuck be-
tween the leaves, and cost mark for
the same amount on the back page, are
very convincing evidences that the
sender isn't SelfiSh.-Puck.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-02-21
WHISKY AND A WHITE WIFE.

A Chinaman's Complaint to the
Police Court Prosecutor.
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
An exile from the fiOwery kingdom
painfully toiled up the circular stairway
of the central police station yesterdayaft-
ernoOn.s There was panied look about
his sallOw face, and sad, far-away
depth to the gaze of his black, almond
shaped eyes. He poked his little
queue-backed head in Clerk COrdeS'
Office and said in meek mild voice:
ME want plaper to lOckee up man
you sabe?'
Third floor, JOHN" said Deputy
Clerk Jones.
Up another long flight of stairs wab-
bled the cOrk-shoed little man, until
noticing sign, prosecutors Office"
he timidly raped upon panel of a
large tObacco-stained door. He waited
nmOment. No answer. Then he
raped again, this time louder, waited,
received no invitation and then went
over and pOked his head into the court
room. He noticed dark-browed man
polishing desk with newspaper.
Isl 10, yung Stwa'' said the almond
eyed man:
Huh? Vat?" said the man polishing
the desk.
"Me wantee valiant" said the sad
eyed foreigner at the door.
''Humph! Vol, by gOll. Ids China
man," said the desk polisher, stopping
long enough to take Whit at an old
clay pipe.
ME wantee valiant" repeated the
Chinaman-fOr such he was.
''Vant a warrant? What's der mat
ter? Did somepody call you teef?'
You no sabe! Me telle you. See |!
Samee whisky! Chinaman no likee.
Go in saloon, tellee white man no sellee
Chinaman's wife whisky, white man.
Mclean man he gettee mad. Kick 'em
Chinaman. Sabe?"
''Mein gracious!" uttered the desk
polisher. Look ad dot, will you? Come
NIT me, you heather, an will tell Mr..
Hull"
The desk polisher, who was the jani-
tor, and the Chinaman. George Sam,
together went into the prosecutors
office. Then ensued scene. Pigeon
tOed English. broken Dutch and pure
English filed the air with harmony dis
cOrdant. Selections of vocal music that
fOated down the hallway were:
ME wantee valiant. Sabe?"
oiI uoWh. you putty-ldceu Heatnen,
and keep quiet"
"Vel, by goll. amt he a tn fool,
dough? Eth? Veil, by goll!''
By degrees Mr.. Hull succeeded in as
certaining that the Chinaman, George
Sam, desired to have Henry Silverman
arrested on a charge of assault and bat
terry. According to Sam's story he went
into Silverman's saloon at No. Al Wood
land avenue to protest against the bar
tender selling his white wife
liquor. Silverman Tired" him from the
saloon and also planted No. 8 boot
under the Chinaman's sack coat. Mr.
Hull issued a warrant, and toward 3
O'Clock Henry Silverman, bartender at
No. fl Woodland avenue, was arrested
by PatrOlman StOtfer. He was charged
with assault and battery upon George
Sam. at present in America, an exile
from the tiowery kingdom.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-02-21
The Ways of Woman.

l wish Adam had died with all his
ribs in his bOdy--BOucicault.
A handsome woman is a jewel: good
woman reaSurer.-Saadi.
To gentleman every woman is lady
i'll right Of her seX.-Bulwer.
What is woman? Only one of natures
agreeable blunders.-COwley.
Women detest serpent through pro-
fessional iealousy.-Victor Hugo.
A fashionable woman is always in love
with .-Rochefoucauld.
Al! women are good-good for some
thing or good for nothing.-Cervantes
A passionate wOman'S love is always
Overshadowed by her fear.-George
Eliot.
Handsome women without religion
are the flowers without perfume.
Heine.
There was never yet fair woman but
she made mouths in glaSs.--Shalzspere
Between a woman's Ives" and "no"
l would not venture to stick pin.-Cer-
vanteS.
Oh. woman! thou vert fashioned to be-
grille, so have all sages said, all poets
Sung.-Jean lngelow.
Trust not woman when she weeps.
for it is her nature to weep when she
wants her way.--SocrateS.
Ideas are like beards-men never have
any until they grow up, and women
none at all.--VOltaire.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-02-21
WATER FOR FIRES.
An Insurance Man Criticises the
Table Comparing St. Paul With
Other Cities.

An Insurance Man CriticiSes the
Table Comparing St. Paul With
Other Cities.
To the Editor of the Globe:
In your Sundays issue note the dia-
gram showing the smalIness of water
mains in the wholesale district, coming
evidently from the board of water
WORKS. This map is nearly correct and
the size Of mains, with one exception,
Minnesota street, which carefully
prepared map shows to be four inches
instead, of six inches. Now comes a
curiosity in the way of special plead
ing-the tables showing the sizes and
per centagcs OF sizes of mains in Balti-
more, Detroit and Newark. Had this
tabulation been accompanied with dia-
grams showing the sizes of mains in the
mercantile districts, they would have
told their own stories and there would
have been no necessity of figuring out
percentages. Most of our larger mains.
as will be shown by the forthcoming re-
port of the board of water commissioners
are out of reach for fire purposes in that
portion of the city occupied by our high
buildings, where the accumulation OF
values in merchandise are very large
and where the best Of facilities for eX-
tinguishing fires are needed.
In the tables above referred to we find
IL, Q and S-inch pipes. These are used
for domestic supplies. and not for fire
purposes. In the report Of the chief
engineer of Baltimore in 1855 he SAYS !:
"Larger water mains should he laid,
both in the high and middle service
districts" In the sane report find
that The water board asked for addi-
tional means in 1886 amounting to II, 100
feet being 5000 24-inch, 1880 20-inch,
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-02-21
REGULAR ARMY NEWS.

Fifty recruits have been ordered for
the troops of the Seventh cavalry serv-
ing at Fort Riley, Kan.
Convict Henry Gilbert, now in the
military prison, is ordered released from
confinement.
Capt. William f. Holman, Ninth in
fantry, has been found incapaciated for
active service and granted leave of alb
sence until further orders.
A general court martial is ordered to
meet at Fort Bridger, Wyo. Maj. John
\. Andrews, TWenty-firSt infantry,
president; First Lieut.. ChaIleS j. Chubb,
Seventeenth infantry, judge advocate.
Capt. Daniel w. Benham, Seventh in
fantry, and Second Lieut.. John ii.
Gardner, Ninth cavalry, are respectively
president and judge advocate OF a gem
eral court martial ordered to convene at
Fort Mckinney, Wyo., the 9th inst.
The superintendent of the general re-
cruiting service has been directed to
prepare and forward to the department
OF the Missouri fifty recruits for assign
ment to the Fifth cavalry, and to the
department of Dakota sixteen colored
infantry recruits for assignment to the
Twenty-tifth infantry.
A general court martial is ordered to
convene at Fort Douglas, Utah, on
Thursday. the 23d inst, the following
named officers comprising the detail:
Capts. James w. Powell, Jr., Sixth in
fantry; David III. Kinzie,. Fifth artil-
lery; Thomas Britton, Sixth infantry;
Stephen Baker, Sixth infantry, and
William Badger, Sixth infantry; First
Lieuts. Charles Byrne, Sixth infantry;
William &. Borden, assistant surgeon,
u. s. A.; Robert r. Stevens, Sixth in
fantry; Scion F. Massey and Samuel E.
Allen, Fifth artillery; Second Lieuts.
Richard W. Young, Fifth artillery;
Charles q. Morton and Amos B. Shat
tuck. Sixth infantry. First Lieut.. Zerah
w. Torrey. Sixth infantry, has been ap-
pointed judge advocate of the court.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-02-21
A Dude and the Door.
Baltimore Sun.

Baltimore Sun.
A ludicrous scene occurred at the
main entrance to the CarrolltOn hotel
yesterday afternoon. A double-peaked-
cap, Understanding, featherweight
dude, who had been playing pool in the
billiard parlors, stopped to light his
cigarette and was left by his friends.
He made bolt for the street, and,
grabbing the handle of the heavy out
side door, he threw his weight and mus
Gle into play, and succeeded in opening
it about four inches, but before he
could slip through his strength failed
and he had to jump out of the aperture
to keep from getting caught between
the doors. Twice again did he try, with
less result each effort. A gentleman
who was about to pass out stopped to
watch the unequal contest, and at
tracted the attention of others. until a
crowd of interested spectators had gath
cred. When the dude discovered that
he was the object of their amusement
he shot whitening glance at the whole
party, and then quickly slipped out
through the billiard saloon and bar,
where the doors are of light lattice work
and do not try the muscle.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-02-21
PREACHING TO THE MINERS.
Some of the Odd Experiences of
Mr.. UZzeli in Leadville in Early;
Days.

Mr.. UZzeli in Leadville in Early.
Days.
MIR. UZZell had many amusing Incl
dents marrying people, and as the
marriage laws were loose but little was
required iD the way of questions to
make everything satisfactory. One day
German, with rather a good-lOoking
middle-aged woman leaning on his arm,
entered the preachers study, says the
New York World. -.
II have just. been let ont of jail'' said
the man, land borrowed a saw and buck
and went in search of work. When l
asked this woman here by my side for a
Job she said she had no money to hire a
man, being poor widow woman. |
told her | would saw the wood and take
her for pay, and she said: All right
and here we are now to get married,
but hain't no money, parSOn, to pay
the bill"
Mr.. Uzzell married the couple and paid
the recorders fee out of his own pocket
On another occasion gambler and a
sport named Charley Smith, and for
tune-teller known as Madame La Prue,
who had made quite fortune in that line
of business, entered his study to have
the marriage ceremony performed.
factOrily answered he requested them to
stand, and then turning to the woman
he said: "Wilt thou have this man to be
thy lawful and welded husband and wilt
thou love, honor, and keep him-''
Hold on, parsOn," exclaimed the
woman, "Ill be derned if I'll keep any
man.
Mr.. Uzzell then explained to her that
it meant that she should love her hus-
band, take care of him in sickness, and
gave general explanation of the mar
riage vows. But she was obdurate and
refused to be married unless the cere-
mOny was performed after her own
wishes, which Mr.. UZZell refused to do
''Parson, you have just lost $50 by not
marrying me the way l wanted" eX-
claimed the woman. as she ordered her
carriage and drove away. The man was
worried, but she was not.
In 1879 Mr.. UZzell was visited by the
Rev. DIR. Warren, now Bishop Warren,
of the Methodist Episcopal Church, and
Chaplain McCabe. One evening there
was quick. sharp rap at the door, and
moment later rOugh-lOOking fellow
entered. ''ParsOn," said the stranger,
1--WE come TO AK you ter marry one of
the boys way down thar in a tent"
Bishop Warren and Chaplain McCabe
asked to accompany, as they desired to
see mining-camp wedding, and their
request was granted. They started out
for the tent. the stranger leading the
way. When about fifty feet from the
house the venerable mother of the
mountain preacher came to the door and
shouted out:
"Oh, Tom! You forgot your revol-
ver."
Mr.. Uzzell. thinking nothing strange
of the occurrence, returned to his house
for the weapon, and moment later re-
joined his reverend trends from the
East. They were both amazed at what
they had seen and heard, and one of
them exclaimed: q
"Why, Brother UZzell, do ministers
carry pistols in Leadville?" Il
''Oh, yes" replied Mr.. UzZell. "When,
I go out after dark l carry revolver in
one pocket and prayer-book In the
other" :,
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-02-21
The Law Was Satisfied.

New York Sun.
They tell down East of a poor fellow
who owned a remarkably fat hog. and
who also owed a rich man. The hog
was about all the property the poor debt5
or had worth levying on, and the law
exempted mans only pig. One day
the creditor, meeting the debtor, saidy
"YOu need another pig; let me send you
little one." The poor man was astOn4.
ished. "Why, owe for the hog Eve got
now," he stammered. "Never mind.
you need another one, and I'll send it,"
the pen by the side of the fat one. In
less than an hour the constable came
and attached the fat hog and took it
away, and thus the law and the rich man
were satisfied.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-02-21

11,60O 16=inch, and $4,000 1O-inch for
lateral lines, Nothing was said about
anything under 10-inch pipes. Evil
IDENTIFY Baltimore has seen the folly of
small water mains. The report
from Detroit has been mislaid,
therefore the figures cannot be
precisely given. Nevertheless, within
the last two years there has been the
same complaint made from the same
cause for which our water works are
now complained of. The same thing
occurred in Chicago at its second big
fire, in 1874, which destroyed upwards
of 81, 000, 900, and then that city saw its
folly and remedied the defects in the
size of its water mains. If our water
works are sufficient why not ask for the
opinion of competent water works en-
gineers, and thus allay the fears of our
merchants and the insurance COM
panieS. INSURANCE MAN.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-02-21
Chivalry of the Newsboys.

Detroit Free Press.
"There's chivalry for you," remarked
a handsome drummer at the Griswold
house yesterday.
WHATS that?" queried slender
young man.
''See those kids over there helping
that girl get her ugly brother along.''
MEverybOdy turned to look out of the
windows, and saw girl of seventeen,
form was cheaply clothed, endeavoring
to coax or force along towards home
brother of about ten years. He was
striking and kicking at her and declar-
ing he would not go home. At this sew
eral newsD0ys and beotblacks, who had
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-02-21

been attracted by the struggles of the
boy, said to the girl: He'll 20 home,
he'll go home; he's only fooling." The
boy was then seized by two newsboys,
one on each side, three or four others
assisted from the rear and the youngster
was walked along at a lively pace,
which was not relaxed until his home
was reached. The girl thanked her
young. assistants, who all declared:
That's all right, sis; when you want
any help, les let up know and we'll
move him for YOU -
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-02-21
A Great Liar.
New York Sun.

New York Sun.
A Cape colonist, who had been found
guilty of indiscreet remarks, publishes
this card in local South African news
paper: ~, the undersigned. A. c. du
Plessis. G. son, retract hereby every
thing have said against the Innocent
|. MT. G. p. Bezuidenhout calling myself