The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-08-05
THE CALIPH.

Who has not heard OF the wise, merry
and tyrannical Caliph OF Bagdad?
No oriental potentate has enjoyed the
same reputation for the wisdom OF his de-
crecs and the sternness Of his decisions,
while on the other hand his merry dispo-
sition found vent in executing the most
absurd tricks and commanding tho most
ridiculous performances.
The caliph's word was law in his native
city, and II was only necessary to remind
his subjects OF desired object and II was
Immediately complied with. Mountains
were leveled and palaces raised with re-
markable celebrity, and amidst II all the
caliph enjoyed happy serenity in OBJ
serving his mandates fulfilled.
The incognito expeditions OF the caliph
afforded him many opportunities OF study
ing the needs and wants OF his people, and
his reminder" was all that was sufficient
10 have the defects remedied.
On one occasion the caliph paid visit
10 the famous city OF old Memphis, which
was at that time in its greatest glory. As
with the history OF all prosperous princi-
palities, the greater lis magnifcence the
more defects and abuses are hidden. Such
was Memphis mt the time OF the caliph's
visit. The visiting monarch discovered
these abuses with the kcenness OF his OIL
servation, and forgetting that he was not
in his own territory, he continued 10 re
mind his subjects Of these neglected
affairs, aud 10 humor his guest, King
Ramcses had these harmless reminders"
published from time to time.
These records were recently discovered
when the tomb OF Ramescs was opened,
and from the wonderful similarity between
the condition Of ancient Memphis In
Egypt and the modern city on the Mssis-
sippi, they have been forwarded ~ this
point TIM AprRAL is permitted 10 make
extracts from this same. and will publish
them from time 10 time. The records
begin thus
TnR cALIPH
reminds his subjcctE
That rs the elections are now over with,
everything shall resume its usual quictness
until the November polls begin.
That ~ veal is now at rather high
price, defeated candidates may enjoy an
economical dish Of crow PIE.
That the hot weather on election day
changed 10 very cold wave for tho Re
publican party before night.
That thermometer at l02' in the shade
requires dccoction for the inner man OF q
80 range.
That the flannel shirt, popularixcd by
the dudes, will form part OF his highncss
wardrobe.
That the 5000 absentees are already get.
ting tired and will return before the ex.
pected time.
Tia, ,ha koliaa 81 Ailo,.h.-.., c.......
Old Point Comfort and Grocnbrier White
are all Memphis girls
That the special Inducements offered by
some OF the leading resorts 30 dancing men
have been accepted by q number OF Mem
phls gentlemen.
That the Democratic cash boy who sac-
rificcd his position rather than perform
mental service for tho negro purchaser,
deserves q substantial recognition.
That the prompt action OF the Chickasaw
Guards during tho threatened riots meets
the approval OF his sercne highness.
That the military organizations Of our
city are not receiving the popular support
that they deserve.
That the electric fans, now on exhibition
at various points, should be Immediately
adopted for this climate.
That in spite Of the weather the juicy
melon Is till receiving tho attention OF the
gourmands.
That the Tycoon prohibits the eating Of
waiermelons In his court-unless no Is
present
That tho regards Of the caliph are here
by rendered uie Tycoon, who might listen
10 tho words oil wisdom, with much profit.
That there are too many streets OBJ
structed with building material TO make
thcm safe thoroughiars
That the work ON Court Square pro.
crosses too slowly 10 suit the citizens who
have hopes Of enjoyingit when completed.
That riottlng seems 20 be epidemic
but the majesty OF tho law mus, be pre-.
served.
That the coolest place about the city is
Jackson Mound Park after o'clock.
That "Fatini,za' is the prcllc-t comic
opera seen here for some time, and cheap
at 50 crnts.
That tue street railroads should run 10
the park gate by al means, aud avoid tho
dusty walk Of two squares.
That the sprinkling carts could do n
vast amount Of work betwccn the cars and
the gates Of the park
That nine tenths Of the visitors 10 lilo
park drink beer In preference 10 mora
cooling drinks
That u Il now almost NJ chesp 10 travel
~ b stay nj home. hut this should moi
induce people 10 jump out Of tho irving |
pan into the fire.
That suns,rokcs arr liable 10 happen IN |
close, hot quarters jus, ~ easily M on the |
streets.
That the complaint about arteaian water
being oily and full 81 sediment IA anita |
true.
That This water has quantity Of iron 10
H. which Is generally prccipi,at,d.
, INA, ate, Az, " Is 100 per cent above |
the old Wolf river conglonlorats.