The Atlanta constitution. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1885-19??, 1888-03-13
AN UNINTENTIONAL SHAVE.
BY Z. H.

Tom and 1 sat by the cozy fire i'll my den,
chatting over old times, and talking Of our
boyhood days.
1t was cold day in January, and though
the wind was whisting shriliy without, yet
within, all was comfort, and we laid back in
our easy chairs, smoked our fragrant cigars,
and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves.
After spinning out yarn after yarn, we sat
for some time Illuminating. Finally said: by
the way, Tom. did 1 ever tell you about the
trouble l once got into about my whisEers ?"
and | stroked them with little pardonable
pride, for I fatter myself they are little
above the average.
"Your whiskers? No, l don't know as you
ever did, tell me about it, and he lit fresh
cigar and settled himself comfortably
"Well, [ began, zone chilly morning in the
latter part Of November, just after 1 had
turned twenty-one, (what a long time ago it
seems) l was walking down Broadway, New
York, thoushtfully stroking what little down
there was on my upper lip and a few stray
Cling hairs ON my face, when l was accosted
by VIII Evans" you remember him 1 added
looking at Tom who nodded ASSENT ''who
said Hello, old fellow where are you bound
for, so early in the morning."
Bound for my Office 1 answered. "You
and intend to get about it, quit loaling, and
see if can make man of myself"
and so you have started out by trying to
grow some brushwood," he said, laughingly,
giving pull to one of the struggling hairs on
my face.
was rather tender on that subject and so I
said, a little too shortly, perhaps, than the oc-
casion demanded, 81 bet YOU in six months
time can have better set Of whskers than
you have right now, though you have been try
ing eight months at least"
TITS a bargain, Joe, " he answered, "I'll bet
with you here: let's stop in Cantons office and
draw up the sign something which ! have in
my minds eye, and give it to old Canton to
keep for us.
IAN right, says I, and in we went. He sat
down to desk, and, taking a pen and ink,
wrote on a slip of paper; at is hereby agreed
by Joe Randall and Win Evans that if either
shave before the first Of next April, the one so
doing shall forfeit the right OF accom-
place whatever between the time of shay
ing and the said first of April, and shall not
give any reasons during that time for not do
ing So besides making the other party pres
ent of thirty dollar suit of clothes"
"You see, Tom, l remember it word for
word; it is indelibly impressed Oh my mind
but to 90 on
Will handed me the paper. read it rather
obviously, but seeing a sneering smile on his
handsome face, / quickly decided would do
name to the paper.
We gave it into to Mr. Canton's keeping
and parted for the day.
Misgivings kept thronging to my mind, but
worked them off, and went home that night re-
solved not to shave "come what would or 60
what might"
Things went on smoothly enough for several
days. though my sister May asked me why
did not shave?' adding insenuously ''that L
looked abominable."
Nliotc n toll l,or 81,
! did not intend to shave, but | expected soon
TO turn out fine set of whiskers."
She said nothing but lifted her hands in
way that expressed volumes
About two days after that I was called out
Of the city on Important business OH which |
was absent five weeks
Ii | had not been obliged to return l verify
believe | would have Staid five weeks longer
rather than go home and face the battery of
pleadings, seedlings and threats which ] knew
awaited me from my fastidious and fashjona-
bic sisters, on account of my Whiskers, if so
they might he designated for they had grown
after fashion peculiarly their own. In some
places there was nothing but down, such as
you see or young ducks, while in others lone
Straggly hairs were dropping gracefully down
ward, while at still other'points on my highly
adorned face, the hair was thick and bushy.
| took the scissors and viciously whacked off
the long hairs, IT'S there was no law against cut
ting it Off, and, with as good grace as | could
that Mary said when got in was. ooh, look at
the fright
And Grace absolutely refused to kiss me,
and wanted me to go right upstairs to my room
and shave.
told them II wasn't going to do it," and
then they commenced, they pleaded with me,
$50 please, Tor their sakes, to take them off :"
they scoldtd me, said, II looked fe2rlully
ugly" (of which fact ] was sadly c0nsciousJ
tiley threatened me, said II should not 20 out
K-lt Ia ft ~ n
Moreover. my cup OF misery was filed by the
fact that Stella Ores son was coming there to
dinner that day, and that the whole party were
going to TIC opera IN the evening; and /
thought ruefully Of the many things that would
occur in the fashionable world between that
tiine and The fast Of April, but / also thought
of the consequences OF shaving. and concluded
that as lad made my bed so / must lie on It.
/ would have given up and have bought the
suit OF clothes though az that time [ could
have i'll afforded it, but it was the part about
tho girl that 1 didn't like
/ knew VIII Evans as vel! as myself was in
love with Miss Stella, and saw then that that
was the reason he had put that part IN, he.
wanted TO getme ont Of the way, the more so,
as he had an idea She liked me the best, and
he thought if / did shave, and according to
our pledge, gave 10 explanation for sighting
her, that he would get 50 veil established In
that time that / would have no chance.
in p ''' ''''0" "'''' '''"'' " 10
81 think So" said Tom, nodi.ug his head.
But had rather a Slim chance anyhow, for
looked 50 ugly that she wa3 not very flyorabiy
impressed with me.
She came to dinner that day, and though
she, Of course, was too polite % make any re-
marks Oh tie subject, stii / could see that my
cause lad not gained any. 4 miserable time
had Of II Oh t!it day. and foi maHy days fol-
lowing. Every place | won, ! $50, tOfmeutod
By outspoI,eu words, Or. 3.;.i worse, by 9lancea
hard 10 ic borne.
avoided tine presence - VIII Evans as
much rs possible hct would occasionally meet
up with nina. when he would ask nc "Gi !
was sici. OIL lr ualeGiu:'
lis "hi.A-ri. h j. unnecessary % mention,
were iu "a 10 ...sh.g2 condition
So 81 'arMu-ei bY dog au1 haiaafcd 81
night by dreams and uiahtulres, which left
my eyes heavy and my co1ateuluoa pale aud
made lac us.lcr tn3u eyc. wa almost