Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1888-07-23
r.r RACKET THEY WORK.
A Graphic Portrayal Of the Methoas
a. wesley, the Captain, and John A.

n
a yyaslsv. the Captain, and John A.
The Republican candidates for the emp
tv honor of the nomination for Congress In
this district, this year, may not agree in
their mathematical calculations when il
comes to ascertaining how the delegates
from a county are divided, but they seem
to be thoroughly in accord in their plans
for closing up the eye Of the agriculturaiist
in the interior on the subject Of the tariff.
Especially when it comes to the tariff on
wool.
These gentlemen are posing in strong
light as the friend of the farmer, and are
roaming up and down the land disinterest,
ingly pointing out the wicked designs Of
the Democrats, and making Themselves
hoarse in telling how the Mills bill will
pull down the price OF wool.
They forget, however, to add that the
Mills bill, as it is interpreted by Repubii,
cans, will be harmless, unless it is passed
through the Senate by the aid of Republic
can votes. 1t therefore would seem that
our three friends of the farmer are in
reality doing the class they atfect to be
pxious about, q great amount of damage
BY DINING into their ears the assertion
that free wool is bound to 60 down,
through the Mills bill, because the natural
tendency of their discourses is to bulldoze
the farmer into panic, and make him &C
cent the present low prices, and thereby
suffer o pecuniary lose, which results IN
the corresponding gain Of the middle-men
and mill owners.
A graphic illustration of the campaign
of the trio of candidates is given in the an
nexed clipping from the Wetzel Democrat
There was eloquence out at the Tyler
Convention, last Saturday. The argu'
ments of the speakers were as clear 81
Monongahela mud. 1t is amusing to think
of the stufing the green and gaping Tyler
Republicans got Commonplace dema.
po9uery was rampant. The three fraternal
candidates for Congress were there form
ing an interesting and sweet picture, WITH
the mighty Jake Kemple for pink and
blue back ground. The burden OF the ora
tory was wool-ah!
George Wesley opened the services by
telling the people that on account OF the
Mills bill his solitary sheep was out on the
mountains bare, away from a tender shep'
herds care. The audience wept. George
W. seized his hat and was about to take
up a collection when he was reminded that
it now became his duty to distribute
Doodle aims and not to receive them. He
is good at it, and this fact being well
known, whenever George and his grip are
around the Republican claw begins to itch
nightly. Geo. W. is the Christian can
didate.
"He was followed by Capt Dovener, who
informed the green and gaping aforesaid
that Horkheimers and all the wool-growers
living in Wheeling had left the Democratic
party. This announcement was received
with terrific snorts. Capt. Dovener is the
wicked and worldly candidate.
John A. Campbell here arose and,
throwing his dark locks out upon the Ty-
Ter breezes, exclaimed, ''This is not wool,
gentlemen, this ia hair" But the audi,
ence wouldn't believe it, and began to
foam at the mouth and swear that while
such long wool was rushed into the market
the short merinos would be down. John
A. is the moral and philosophical candi'
date. As result, the delegates were di-
vided between Capt. Dovener and George
Wesley, the good people claiming the most
of them. A moral, middle ground man
has no chance in Tyler.
FINALLY arose Jake Kemple. BAH
said Jake. i have sold my sheep. / have
lawge fawhm out in Belmont county,
Ohio, and have not sheep on it. The
Mills Bill-ah - here Jake fell fainting
into the arms of Samaritan Resb0ut and
was laid out on sycamore plank with
woolsack under his head.
1.-THE convention then took turn at the
Judicial wrangle aud then adjourned"