, 1888-10-20
KNOTT'S FUNNY SPEECH.
THE KENTUCKY CONGRESSMAN TELLS
THE STORY OF HIS INSPIRATION.

A Serious Grafton Prepared hut Never
Delivered-A Lobbyists Wonderful Map
of Duluth Leads to "A Brilliant Display
of Congressional Humor.
-Fhe-ed-herdic which runs from the
Capitol TO the White House was fun the
other day, and a stocky, portly, short man
hung on by the strap. He was cold and
his round head was well rap in q
green wooden comforter and his plug hat
was pulled well down over his brow. His
face only shone, but it looked like n piece
of rare china The color was as rosy us
the most florid of Rubens' paintings, and
the eyes shone ont through white winkers
as blue as a midsummer sky. A short
moustache of silver was the only sign of
whiskers, and the face was as round and
as full as thar of the moon. He smiled a8
l asked him whether the day was as cold
as those of Duluth. 1t was Proctor Knott,
of Kentucky, whose funny speech on Du-
luth some fifteen years ago made him
famous, and who is now visiting Wash
ington and hobnobbing with his old con-
gressional friends. l am told his speech
still sells, and 1 saw some of these Duluth
speeches recently at n second hand book
store, and was told they were worth a
quarter apiece.
Proctor Knott had no idea at the time
that this speech was going to make his
reputation, and it was al inspiration
Rhieh comes only once in n life time. He
told me the story. He said; cit was near
the close of the session, and 1 was asked
TO speak on the land subsidy bill in the
house. 1 prepared a sober Grafton, with
no more u in its points than in the
moral law, n it was nearly as long. 1
tried to get the speakers eye, and when
the bill was about passing Holman was
preferred before me. l asked him to give
me his right to the floor, or a part of his
time. He told me he could not do it. At
last l spoke to the speaker and he said he
thought he could arrange to give me a
bearing.
NO IDEA OF HUMoR.
This was several days before. the
speech was made, and had no idea Of
humor as yet. A day or so later a lobby
list called npon me and told me that n bill
would soon come up to improve the har-
Dor of Duluth. l asked him to tell me
where Duluth was. l knew, of course,
its situation, bnt l wanted him to under
stand that 1 thought but little of his bill
and be thus able to refuse his request.
He did not see my irony, but he put his
hand in his breast pocket and pulled ont
a IN Here was the whole civilized
world drawn in circles, and these circles
grew smaller and smaller until at last
Nlty lllllllultu III IL uO az luG CtIJtT, anu
on hat dotwas printed the word Duluth
These were hundred mile circles, and the
distances of all the great cities of the coun-
try were noticed, and their small dots
looked hR hamlets compared with Duluth.
Tolooka at that map you would suppose that
if you wanted to go to Liverpool, London
or Co~nstantinople you'd have first to go TO
Duluth for your start, and on the map were
printed statistics showing that there were
. 0OO 0O0 Snfara n1ilac nhnrt thot rof,t
all tributary to Duluth. The bland young
man delivered his eulogy of this nightly
embryonic city, and | saw as he did SO
the nance for some fun in the house. l
asked him 10 leave the map, and said that
l lived on a little creek in Kentucky, and
that most of my people had never seen a
ship. He lie this, and he suspected
nothing, saying: Mr.. Knott, l hope you
will study that map, and go for our BILL
81 replied, 4 will go it, but 1 never saw
him again. AS l thought more over the
matter the fun grew upon me, and l found
that l could make my speech o n the lane
bill and bring in Duluth. | went to the
library and prepared some of the best
parts of the humor, and | intended it only
rs an introduction to my more sober
speech. When / got the floor | found the
house with me, INT when my time was
extended l could not go up from the
ridiculous to the sublime. l went on with
the humor and dropped the serious
Grafton, and the speech over which l had
spent days of labor was never delivered.
Tn greater part of the humorous speech
was the result Of the inspiration of the
moment, and while l made it / never
thought that IL would put the country
upon a broad grin. 1 was astonished the
next day to find every one talking about
it and that all my friends at the Capitol
congratulated me npon it."-Frank G.
Carpenter in New York World.