St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-09-23
ROWSER'S FRISkY GOAT
Destroys the Harmony of a Peaceful
Family.
\ PLAYFUL COMPANION.
It Butts the End Out of Everything, In
GLIDING Bowser, Who Trusted
Him.

OSlIOll rTSo
Three or four boys came to the back
door the other night and inquired for
Mr.. BOwser, and as soon as he came up
from the Office mentioned the fact, and
added:
"You are not going to buy another
dog, hope?"
"Humph!" he replied, as he hung up
his hat.
"And l don't want any cats around"
"That's just like you. It's wonder
to me the brute creation doesn't fly
when you step out doors. wouldn't
have as hard a heart as yours for all the
world"
"And as for pigs, Mr.. Bowser, hope
you won't think of 'em. The neighbOrs
haven't yet got over your last adventure
in the pig line"
''Nly adventure!" he shouted. "You
leased me to buy pig and build pen.
wanted to crafty you, pumpkin-head
that was, and l bought a pig. What
did have to do with his sQuealing the
whole twenty-fouT hours? What did l
have to do with his getting out of the
pen dozen times per day?'
"Oh, well, let's not have any more
COWS or pigs or hens or dogs. We don't
seem to understand them"
Don't we? We don't if we don't
want to! Some wives are domestic, and
like to make home of home, but
others think of nothing out dressing
and gadding the streets"
"If a. husband buys COW which gives
twt quarts of milk daily, ana her feed
also comes to five times the price Of her
milk, don't see where the economy
comes in."
He didn't reply to that, and next
morning when | opened the back door
the same three boys were waiting for
Mr.. Bowser. They had a William goat
with them. The animal was securely
tied with ropes, and the boys kept a
Vigilant eye on him besides. That's
what Mr.. BOWser was up to, ana as |
knew he had set his heart on it, said
never a word. He Sneaked out to the
barn, came to terms with the boys, and
the goat was turned into the back yard.
When we had finished breakfast Mr..
Bowser placidly inquired:
"Mrs. BOwser, do you know that there
is money in gOatS?"
"HoW?"
"They are not only valuable for their
wool and meat, but in sanitary point
of view they cannot be equaled. One
goat would keep our back yard entirely
free from everything offensive"
"WOuld hep"
''Not only that, but he would be a
playmate for our child, and doctors tell
me that the odOr of a goat stimulates a
child's appetite"
'What doctors, pleaSe?"
''If | said anything about angels
you'd want me to specify BetSey, Sarah
or Hattie, wouldn't you?'
"Well, | presume they are healthy,
Mr.. Bowser. You must know, of
course
Certainly I know. Do not cOnfound
the goat with chamOis, Mrs. BOwser;
there's a marked difference between
them. The channels is found in India,
Asia, Switzerland and two or three
other countries; the goat is indigenous
very timid animal; the goat is not. 1t
rather seeks the society of man."
a. wish knew as much as you do" |
said, wishing to mOllify him still fur
Their.
Yes, but you never will" You can't
expect to. You were not born that way.
However, l have Il surprise for you and
the children. have just made pur-
chase of a goat"
"a real gOat?"
Certainly. Some folks deal in the
imitation. | never do. Come out into
the back yard"
We went out. William had Just fin
ished the last of the kitchen towels the
girl had on the grass. and lie acted like
a goat who wanted something more
solid to finish up on. Mr.. BOWSer took
baby in his arms and started down the
steps ami William lowered his head and
struck out with his foot.
'He may be dangerous, Mr.. BoWser."
Dangerous! So is a canary bird.
You will see him take to the child like
a fly to sugar. See how stately he
stands! I'll have a photographer up
here this afternoon"
He was advancing as he spoke. and he
was not yet halfway across the yard
when / saw streak of goat shooting
across the grass. A dull thud followed,
and baby flew over the clothes-line
and Mr.. BowSer went to grass. Howl
got that child into the house l can't
remember, but guess the goat was too
busy with Mr.. BOwSer to notice me.
They rolled over and over. They rose
up and went down again. Sometimes
Mr.. BOwSer was on his hands and knees
and again he was doubled up on the
grass. l screamed for the cook. and
with great presence of mind she seized
a couple of fresh sheets OFF the
clothes-bars and ran out with
them as an offering. The goat
preferred sheets to Bowser, and as he
turned away and began to devour them
my husband crawled up the steps to a
place of safety. He had been hit in
what they call the "bread-baSket," and
in the small of the back, and between
the shoulders, and, indeed, the goat had
neglected no opening.
"Mr BOwser, / said, as / brought the
camphOr, "do not confound the goat
with the chamois. The channels is
very timid animal, while the goat is
not"
He looked up at me with stony gaze.
"IIe is not only beautiful playmate
for our child, but the doctors say that
Are you not hungry, Mr.. Bowser?'
There was a whole load of stone in his
gaze this time.
'They are not only valuable for their
wool and meat" went on, but in
sanitary point of view they can not be
equaled."
He uttered groan, and crept into the
house and tumbled on the lounge. 1t
took me an hour to get the grass and
sand out of baby'S hair and ears, and
just finished when Mr.. Bowser rolled
off the lounge, ran down stairs for a
snow shovel. and a minute later ap-
peared in the back yard, and made rush
for the goat. He hit the clothes-reel,
the barn, the fence and the ash-barrel,
but missed the goat. William ducked
and lodged and twisted, and had great
fun for twenty minutes. Then it sud-
denly struck him that he had an en-
gagement elsewhere, and he went over
the fence like a cat and clattered out of
sight on the sidewalk. By and by Mr..
BOwScT came in.
us he gone?' | asked.
Eyes, he is gone. And want to say
to you right here and now that it is the