The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1888-05-11

ing, / had no means of knowing that
the pigeons hearts figured in it. So
one day ! inquired for the birds.
"What became of the little birds?
Wall, now, indade, that is q funny
question: said De Planners, in her
most hostile and offensive manner.
why, you ct 'em, of coorse"
How were they cooked?' ! In
sisted.
" First, ma am, the hearts was en-
tried, and then the pigeonses was cur
ried into what is called sr'yal barbe-
cue But I7presume you have not been
accustomed to such dishes''
81 don't think / have" replied;
"but have been accustomed to respect,
and in future you must not fail to re-
remember that fact;'' and / looked
the thieying termagant straight in the
eyes.
Faith, and it's no disgrace not to
be able to recognize barbecue" was
the Modified answer, in mellifuous
tones.
My experience with the tradesmen
was unique. But there was not one
among the number who did not appear
pleased to take my orders, and I could
fcelby the way they regarded me that,
as honest men, they thought it about
time for somebody to look into things.
Henry's bill was SO startling that l
had the greatest difficulty in conceal
ing my establishment. Fish for one
| week, $12; meat $26; poultry and
game, $21. The bills for fruit and
groceries were even more preposterous,
and as hastily totalized the bills of
the year at this rate, / concluded that
unless Tom Guernsey was q much
| richer man than had ever been led
to suppose, he could not fail to be
swamped by such extravaganza
On the occasion of my first market
ing l had sent home sirlion roast with
the trimmings These intended to
see utilized into soup and nice
clarified drippings; but when | sought
the kitchen on my return the drippings
were conspicuous only by their alb
sence. Naturally my first business was
to inquire for them.
'Oh, Wis, the waste fat bits, ye
NAME" was the cool response. II
never allow them things round. No
fust families does.
"But what did you do with them" !
asked.
"Jist whisked 'em into the beggar-
boys basket, neck and heels, along
with some other Tavin's;'' and Mrs.
De Hammers hummed little rounde-
lay with serenity Of impudence
which never saw approached.
Margaret, see your month is up
to-day" l remarked, after swallowing
my wrath for moment; "and here is
your money" counting it out deliber-
ately; land there is no more work for
you to do in this house. !"
| I once took part in Western
cyclone, and was in imminent danger
of being bombarded out of existence
by flying corn-cribs. pig-pens, and the
like; but that was mild compared to
the blizzard that ragged in my cousins
kitchen. Mrs. De Planners cast about
her with will. Pie plates, pot covers,
tureens, pokers, shovels, and every
thing that she could lay her hands on,
went flying through the air. Mary,
frightened almost out of her wits, ran
to the door for a policeman, and found
one. His arrival only added fuel to
the fire, but firm grasp on her arm
brought her to terms, and fifteen
minutes later Mrs. De Hammers had
turned her broad back upon the estab-
lishment that had some reason to be-
lieve would know her no more forever.
When ! took aunt up some boiled
custard not long after this browning
melee, a little flushed and very tired
from my encounter, did not meet
with the praise and encouragement
which / felt had a right to expect.
| "Flora Il say it's all you" she said,
between her hastings and swallowings.
"Well, SO it is" Ireplied, almost
ready to cry.
land if De Hammers, TANNERS, or
whatever her name is"-Dammers, l
felt like suggesting-.'is anywhere on
the American continent when Tom
and Flora return, she'll be coupe'd
back to - Park avenue, and you
mark my words
"You talk as if Flora were an out
and-out fool" I remarked in my
wrath.
| "Well. so she isl was the cool re-
sponse II wonder you hadn't spoiled
this custard, Hannah, in all your ex-
element, but it is the best yet. You
see, Flora and Tom are two turtle
doves, " the aggravating invalid went
on, "and Flora thinks money grows
on trees. Tom lets her. She can't
shake the tree fast enough; hence the
De TANNERS and that ilk. Of course
I'm glad the octopus is removed; but
the worst OF it is, Hannah, you may
get somebody just as bad. y
The next day Henry gave warning.
He had anticipated mine by only a
few hours. l had fathomed the whole
plot, and he knew it. The cook and
the butler had ordered as they pleased,
and divided the spoils among their
kindred. How many families Tom
Guernsey supported, none of us will
: ever know.
The bills for the second week of my
housekeeping were so small compara-
lively that found myself specializing
whether or not we had all had enough
: to eat.
Mary stepped into the cooks place,
and with careful training did good and
faithful work. 1t was home now in
every sense of the word, and not a
clearinghouse kept by servants
l thought best to write the whole
story to the travellers Toms answer
was characteristics:
i | An, III r