, 1888-12-04

rOOn-lt hQlolneO the one In winch Sne
sat-but not to go to bed. as l might need
her. Then, assuming the coolest manner
possible, Icrossed the sitting room, opened
the stove door and renewed the fire, and
while my face was turned from him said,
1.-THE farce has lasted an hour, Mr.. B,
and l fail to appreciate it. However, If l
still have patience to listen, will you tell
me why you are hereT' l rose hen and
resumed my seat on the chaise Tongue.
He always moved quickly, but stealth
lily, like a cat; and with some such move
ment he came behind me and whispered,
close, close to my ear: "Are you not afraid
of mel" With my blood fairly standing
still in my veins / answered: mot at all.
Why should l be2 You must be out of
your mind"
CHATS Just it," said he. Then re-
Stunning his walk up and down the room,
he continued: Ibid you never hear that /
had once been insane?'
yes" l replied, 81 did hear something
of the kind; but that was many years ago,
l believe; an illness, was 1t mott How
ever, whatever you were then will hardly
excuse you for your conduct tonight"
He stopped, eyed me curiously for a mo-
ment, then crossed the room swiftly to
where / sat, and STOPPING, put his hand
about my throat. He clasped it with his
long, slender fingers, gently, very gently,
as he said: What a strange, evanescent
thing life is; l could crush tout so easily
-seel" with q closer pressure-'J could
kill you with my thumb and finger"
l ~disengaged the hand, and pointing to
a chair near me, l begged him to be seated.
He obeyed. asked: "Do you remember
anything of your life in the asylum" A
sad, panied look came over his face; the
demon was overcome for the moment at
least. had struck the right chord. He
replied: Yes; l remember everything.
Shall | tell it to your"
Glad of the respite, and hoping to find
a way to control him eventually, l settled
myself to listen to his story. l give 1t in
his own words as nearly as l can recall
them.
From the time l was 10 years of age l
was a sort of wanderer. was educated
partly in Germany and finished at Oxford,
England. Thence l went to France,
where l spent two years, and after that l
lived for some time in Australia. l finally
landed in India, where / expected to 60
into business with my brother-in-law A
short time after my arrival there l suf-
fered n sunstroke which almost cost me
my life, and utterly dethroned my rea-
son. For six months l was a great care
to my sister, but at the end of that time
l was entirely restored, both mentally
and physically, and we determined to go
to st. Petersburg. 1t had been our child
hood home, and shortly after our arrival
there we were in the fashionable world,
meeting old friends and making new &C
quaintances. Among the latter was the
Countess L., a lovely girl of 10 years.
She had soft dark eyes, full of passion, a
complexion like n ripe peach, and a mouth
all / dare not recall her face. 1t makes
me mad even now, and l am old and gray,
and she is-dead.
Enough. l loved her, l won her love.
The formalities of a betrothal were gone
througifwftf1,1 our friends had congratu-
lated us, and within q few months we were
to have been married. l was wild with
happiness. Alasl why did l not die thenl
l had ~unbounded faith in her, my lady
love, but l became absurdly Jealous. /
was haunted by all sorts of fears. 1t was
as if some evil spirit had taken possession
of me, which neither my reason nor her
devoted affection could exercise. would
lie awake at night and imagine 1 heard
her calling to me for help; at another
time some fiend would whisper to me that
my love was untrue. So l doubted and
trusted her by turns and almost broke her
heart with my foolish fancies. knew
that all my trouble was but the effect of a
sicAy imagination, and l would determine
again and again to fight off the weakness,
only to become more and more a victim.
So my nights were spent in torture and
my days in agony lest some n should
discover my condition.
One day 1 became possessed with the
idea that my fancee had need of me; l
could hear her sigh and weep. hurried
to the house, gained admission, and when
she came to meet me l fell at her feet and
implored her to tell me the cause of her
trouble. She coldly repealed me; told me
l was jealous of phantoms; that 1 had an
noyed her greatly and she would decline
to see me again unless l could behave like
a sane man. "Like a sane man." Was l
insane then2 Whether 1 was or not, she
had aroused a demon in me. dumped to
my feet, sprang at her like q tiger and
clasped her in these arms so savagely
that 1 crushed and frightened the poor
darling out of life. She uttered a de-
spairing cry and the next moment she lay
at my feet like a frozen flower. Can you
conceive of my agony as l looked at her,
dead, quite dead, as / supposed. 1 had
killed the woman l adored, and 1 knew 1
was mad. Yes, a lunatic. She had seen
it and / had half realized 1t myself for
some time, but l had kept the secret from
my friends with all the cunning of a lu-
matte.
Well, they bound me and took me to
my home. l was adjudged insane and
"a ochb w Ill hoJtoHB "hVL " .
years 1 lived upon the rack, conscious of
my surroundings, recalling daily the part
ing scenes with my fancee, the hurried
seizure of my person, my bound arms and
the final turning of the key of my prison.
All sorts of fancies kept my brain in a
whirl. At one time, 1 thought that the
flies in my room were soldiers and / would
try and marshal them in line, and because
they would not obey l would go into vio-
lent paroxysms of rage which would al
ways end in a straight jacket. Then a
long blank would follow, and when an
other lucid moment would come I could
remember distinctly all that had &C.
Cured. The one illusion that was with
me ever, even in my sanest moments, was
that when 1 killed my beloved that her
spirit had entered above which had found
its way into my room and lowered above
me always. When l lifted my eyes l
could see her ever with outstretched
wings, and my ears were filed with her
soft cooling.
My recovery was retarded because l
could not eat. Try as / would l could not
make myself swallow. knew that food
was placed upon the table for me to eat,
and would try again and again to lift 1t
to my lips, but my will was not strong
enough to compel obedience of my hands.
When rnu laa,ora fn~cnl - 81 au-o1Io,y ~