Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1888-06-26
A WEDDING GARMENT.

that am one of the leanest young men
they ever saw in their lives. When walk
the streets | am grieyed by tho remarks
Of certain class OF small boys who have
not had proper home training. These re-
marks are of a comparative nature
being one object of comparison, and the
lamp posts by which am passing the
other.
III 60 ten blocks without hearing any
thing said about "bean poles" and Living
skeletons" / am glad Being just six feet
three In height does net add particularly
to the beauty of my appearance.
Let no one suppose because write SO
calmly of my leanness that am not sensi-
tive regarding it. l an
The day overheard young lady say
at q picnic that l looked like a section of
railroad bridge was the saddest day Of
my life.
To overcome as far as possible the gro
tesque appearance of my excessive lack Of
flesh always wear 'fheavy weigh" goods.
and no tailor ever secures my patronage
who does not thoroughly understand the
art of padding"
confess to certain degree of vanity
regarding my personal appearance, and
when / made the bEssiui discovery that L
was about to be married | gave no little
thought to the appearance | should pre-
sent ON an occasion when. more than at
any other time IN my life, SO many per-
sons would be gazing upon me.
read books on etiquette to know If,
under any circumstances, q man might
properly be married with his overcoat and
two suits of clothes On, but, to my dis
tress, found that this was allowable only
in cases of elopement, and as my wife had
set her heart ON church wedding. with
everybody IN full dress, l gradually forced
myself into the conviction that the over
coat and one suit of clothes would have
to be discarded
A man Of my build" looks positively
and irredeemabay awful in the conven-
ments Of which most wedding suits are
made When l see such man thus ar
rayed I am convinced that there is really
something in the D:arwinian theory.
But, as it he'd TO be so, | was married
In the garments best calculated to make
my attenuation glaringiy apparent. NV
friends were kind, however, and said
nothing TO cast a cloud on my happiness
all but my sister Nell She owed ME
grudge dating back to the days of our
childhood, and. IS she put her arms
around my neck and kissed me, she whis-
pered in nay ear:
"Oh, Tom, you look awfully shoe
stringy In that suit"
A separation of four years made it pos
sible for me to speak to Neil when we
met again. but / sometimes fear that we
can never be the dear friends we once
were.
After our marriage my wife and l went
Immediately to fer distant western city,
in which we made our home. l was too
poor to throw or give away my detested
wedding garments, but / soon reduced
them to state of great shabbiness by
wearing them under my overcoat when
about my work as reporter on daily
paper. We were not society people, and
/ had no idea that [ would ever again
need suit of that Kind. One day when
went home to dinner my wife said:
See here, Tom. it's a shame for you to
be wearing that handsome So suit out in
that way. Don't YOU suppose you could
Sell 1t and get some more suitable and
cheaper garments for every day wearf'
here take occasion to say that my wife
Is very econnanical as well as practical
and sensible woman. Sometimes think
she knows more than know.
told her that would think about her
suggestion. A wise man will never seem
TO come into immediate accord with the
opinions Of his wife. 1t is always best to
hang back and pretend that you have a
little sense of your own. even though you
know that you have not.
At 10 o'clock that night, as I was closing
my desk at the Office preparatory to going
home, the managing editor Of my paper
said:
See here, Dixon: that report you wrote
of the trouble up at the Christabel mine
was uncommonly well done, and will be
talked about tomorrow. / think l can get
your salary raised on the strength of it.
In the meantime, here's little OF some
thing to show you that the paper appreci-
ates good work"
AS he spoke he handed me crisp, new
$50 bill He was rich; the paper was
making great deal of money. and felt
that was not being paid as much as
earned, SO / took the money without any
hesitation. Fifty dollar bills were very
scarce at our house, and as | hurried home
though the dark streets / fancied to my
self my wife's pride and pleasure when
should tell her'of my good fortune on the
morrow.
For perfect security I folded and re-
folded the bill until it was about an inch
square, and tucked it down into the watch
pocket of my pantaloons. pocket had
never used before. and one that few
men, clothed in their right minds, ever
use at all.
Before morning I was awakened by
great fire in distant part of the city,
and, hastily DOMINIC an old suit that !
kept for just such occasions, hurried out
to get good report Of the fire. which
happened to be OF unusual magnitude
We got out an extra" and it was late in
the afternoon when reached home again.
As entered the house my wife held up q
ten and FIVE dollar bill, and said tri-
umphsntly:
There, my dear, You have that much
to pay on a suit that will do you some
good You don't know what q manager
you've married While you were away
today l sponged. brushed and gssolined
your wedding suit until it looked almost
as good as new; and l carried it down to
old Isaacs. the second hand and mis6t
man. and got SIS for it.
; Mary janet" said colby, and it wss
the first time had ever called her by her
full name; and she turned SIS pale as
was. Dlo yea, Mary Jane DIAon, look
carefully in all the pockets of that suitI'
why, yea, Tom" she said, reassured.
''In all Of themF- asked again
Eyes. in ali; Pm certain"
IN that mlseraDie, wreucneu, oecep-
tive, useless thing in the trousers called
& watch pocketY'
"Why-no-Tom, I didnt-I-F-
She burst into tears, and sat down with
her apron over her face | stalked intosI
a,oSA>., ~oorc opj l,enc,J 80 dr>or x-o,-,-