Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1888-02-12
BOWSER'S FIRE ESCAPE
Mr.. B. INVESTS THIRTY DOLLARS IN AP-
PARATUS.
Scruful Reception Of Criticisms Advanced BY Mrs,
BOwser - Why the Fire Escapes
Are Not mich Talked
Of New.
Detroit Free Press.

Detroit Free Press.
The other afternoon, says Mrs. B,wser,
al expressman delivered at the house sew
eral strange packages, and when Mr.. Bow
ser anne up in the evening he explained
that they were fire escapes.
What for?"
For the house, of course."
"But we don't need any fire escapes on
our house, Mr.. Bowser."
Don't we? Well we shall have them
Just the same. If you want to be burned
have no objection, but l propose to die some
other way"
"You never said there was any danger"
Because / didn't want to make you
nervous. As a matter of fact / haven't felt
safe any night for a year"
And now the danger will be obviated?"
at will Re reduced to the minimum.
certainly. Even If we wake up and fnd
our bedroom on fire we shall be able to
escape with only a scorch."
Alter supper he carried the parcels up
stairs. There were several bottles aud q
couple of wire racks, a hand fire extin-
guisher and q rope and pulley and other
stuff.
"where would a fire be likely to start in
the house?" l asked Mr.. Bowser, as he was
fixing a hook in the casing Of our bedroom
window.
Down stairs, probably"
"Well, we have a front and back stairs,
and here are three chamber windows open
ing oct on veranda roofs, Couldn't We
escape by some OF these ways?"
'If / thought We could would / be fool
enough 10 20 and throw away $50 on this
apparatus? 2" he angrily demanded.
IL suppose you know best"
Mrs. Bowser, when l don't know best
l will resign. While You have never given
the subject OF fire escapes one single
thought, / have devoted years of study to
il. Take our wall eyed darling and 90
down stairs, and when / want you | will
call"
In about an hour he called. He was 10
great good nature. He had the hook
firmly in place, ard hanging TO it was a
rope and some sort of harness.
1T isn't much Of an ornament TO our
bedroom" I ventured to observe.
"What has ornament 20 to do with fire
escspes9 Isn't your life worth more to
you than the daily presence of n tea store
chrome? The escape is now ready"
"For WHAT"
ITO escape by, of course. Here is the
situation: 1t is midnight. The cook,
while rummaging about in search of her
lost quid Of gum, has dropped lighted
matches under the front aud back stairs
The flames have been smouldering for
hours They now hreak forth with sud
den fury, cutting off our escape from
either stairs"
"Aud we crawl ont on the vetanda
roofs"
"Do We? Not much! We start to do
80, but we find that all the verandas have
fallen to the ground, the supports having
been heaved out by the frost"
"Well?"
"Well, We awake with the crackle Of
flames in our ears. While you wiring your
hands and declare that you are lost, | calm
ly secure all the money, jewelry and val
liable papers, and coolly make preparations
to escape. l calmly pull down the rope
and harness, seat you and the baby therein,
and the next moment YOU are LANDED on
the ground. / follow Just as the engines
arrive, and tn. papers next morning
chronicle my wonderful self-possession in
the face of awful danger"
"And don't they say anything about
me?"
mot a word, or il they do, it Is to re-
max that yuu were in @ dead faint, and
your feet never looked so large"
And can You go down by that rope and
harness."
"Can II Can you chop wood with on
axe9 What is it for except to go down
on"
81 would almost rs soon be burned as to
try it. don't believe you would dare 10
90 down on it"
"Mrs. BOwser, what a woman believes
and a man knows are two different things.
Is it likely | would purchase this appara-
tins and put it up here if / didn't dare use
IL? Shove up that windowl"
"But | wouldn't try it. You are rather
clumsy, you know"
another insult! Shove up that win
down.
I put MP the sash and he seated himself
in the harness, sat down on the sill and
prasped the rope over his head, and with q
look Of disdain in his eyes, he swung him
self off. A wild howl rent the air, followed
by the thud Of something striking the
earth, and | looked out To see Mr. Bowser
lying in a heap below the window. ran
down and ont as soon as possible, and after
seven or eigh. minutes he was able to limp
into the house with me.
"Mr. Bowser, are you much hurt" /
asked.
He glared at me but did not reply.
"I'm sorry you tried it,"
Some more glare.
81 told you | thought it dangerous"
"Mrs. Bowser!" he huskily began a. he
Jumped down on the sofa, this ia the be
ginning Of the end"
What do you meaD?"
81 mean you have made the last attempt
on my life you'll ever have a chance to.
You bounded me for weeks and weeks TO
get this fire-escape, and you meant my
death by a fall!'
"Why, Mr.. Bowser!"
"Say no more! l saw il 10 your eyes ss
You pushed me off the sill! Tomorrow
we separated"
But when the morrow came he sneaked
up and removed the apparatus and pitched
4. H. .II.u ool So anoa harapti