St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1888-09-01
FULL o. FUN.

Mr.. SmitA-"Are you foad of 70
partee. Miss Elsie?" Elsie-':NO, sir, ]
prefer Oolong."
Man Is considered the provider Of
. family. That is the reason the little
ones look to their fodder for sustenance.
-Binghamton Republican.
Bishop dining with the family
so you wouldn't like to be . Bishop.
Bobby. when you grow up?" Bobby
I'D like to we'll enough, but ~ every
body says take after mas side Of the
family. l don't s'pose I'll ever be fat
enough for q Bishop."-M 7. Sem.
She Cooking at tho sea)-'How
grand, how glorious. George. it Is to
watch the angry waves rs they lash
themselves against the shore!" He
with equal ecstasy. but less fiuency)-
''Yes, and-and-h damp it all
seemsr'-Litc.
Proprietor (scornfully) - ''Drust
.TOu for den cents? You dinks / gets
me dem zour krout for holdings. amt
it? don't was. .drust mine fadder for
den cents" Brady-"For wud l.
bedad. Nor wud any body who knew
the ould thafe. bad cess to him!"-
Teras Sitaings.
Rich Old Lady (entering palace
car)-'I want . seat on the shady side.
porter" Porter-.'On whichever side
you sit will be tho sunny side" The
old lady gives him . dollar. and writes
to the papers to complain Of the over.
worked condition Of tho palace-car
employes.-Harpcr's Bazar.
She had been singing '.Home.
Sweet Home" TO her husband-his
favorite song-and as the last note Of
the beautiful melody trembled ON the
air Bridget opened the door and said:
The landlord is at the frunt dure.
sorr. an says that II he don't get the
back rint tomorrow marnin' he must
hav the house. Sitlin9s..
She wanted to take some lessons
In archery. but she was very. very
verdant. "Have you bow and quiver?"
USAC0 t1C VO4oC1VTs
she hesitated. II have q beau. but ]
haven't quiver any more. He's been
coming for about two months now. and
I'm used to it."-Critic.
Physician Ito patient)-"You are
suffering from nervous prostration. sir.
Have you been drinking heavily Of
late?" Patient-"No. SIR" Physician
-"Business matters trouble you to-
aay?" Patient-"No. sir; / wasn't Al
the ONCE at all. I've been having my
baby's photograph taken"
-Jack-"Isn't II about time, Des.
pard. that you returned the twenty
dollars you borrowed Of me some
months ago?" Despard generously
-"Oh. don't let that worry you. old
fellow. When / do settle. I propose to
pay interest on the money. I'm .
square man. Jack, and never 60 back
on q friend. d."-Tid-B Bits.
YES" said Uncle Rastus. Use
been takin' brain food To- ter stimulate
my mem'ry. an it's wukin' fust rate. ;"
IL hope il has worked sufficiently for
you to remember. Uncle Rastus, that
you have owed me seventy-ave ccnts
for over year." "Yes, sab; dat wa>
one oh dc fust things l numbered. and
jes' as was gwine 'roun' TO- ter pay de
money I also 'membered dat wuddent
have nufiin lef ter buy . Goldfish Wit.
Dat brain food. Mistah SnIf, am q
great discovery. ."-Epoch.
-OTara (marshal Of the organiza-
tion known - the vertlant Sons Of
Erin)-"Now, thin! / want to say to
the members, that whin at perade rist,
I shall expict aich an livery wan to
stand in the position Of . sojer. with
their hands clasped and their arms
foldedr' O'Hara q private. with IN
inquiring mind)-"Will ye please show
us. Mr.. O'Tara, how that can be
done?" OTara (equal to the emer-
gency)-"Do as bid yez, now. and
kape more silence In thin ranksr'-
Idea.