The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1888-06-28
BRIGHT BITE.
You never hear the bee complain,
Nor hear IL weep nor wall;
But II ii wish it can unfold
a very painful tail.

foU never hear the bee complain,
Nor hear it weep nor wall;
But it wish it can unfold
Il very painful tail.
Huntington Critic.
A woxAs's motto: There's always room at
the bottom-for a postscript or two.-FAIck.
THE best way to prevent a conspiracy from
leaking out is to let the plot thicken.-Netc
YORK Tribune.
JACK GooDFEI1ow's SMALL BRorHER-Jack,
is there any past tense of due,
JACK (gloomily)-Yes, dun.-Hdrudrd Lam
pOOn.
POLIcENAs-Hello, What's this?
One OF the Crowd-Case of prostration
Policeman froms HEATH
Crowd-No, banana peel.-Ne,C Haven Netcs
A FASHION item says the hustle is going
out, but the trouble IS after being out few
hours, 1t comes in again, with the woman who
took il ont somewhat demoralized, perhaps, but
it gets back.-NOrrtstOwH Herald.
YorNG LADY Ito dealer)-I want to look at
hammocks
Dealer-Yes miss You want one for your
own ilsef
Young Lady-Ye-es, partly; but it must be
strong .-Ne1c York sun.
SALESMAN TO young ady;-You win find these
stockings Of excellent quality, ma am, and the
coiors are fast.
Young Lady--Haven't you any without the
manufacturers name stamped along the topY
That doesn't look weu.-Nel0 York Sun.
FoND father Ito his boy who has just returned
from years absence at schooll-Well, how did
draw welll
Boy nt-mindedly)-Draw weIlg Nawl
Awful hard luck Never filled a flush during
the whole terIn.-Judge.
"PARsoN," said Elder Plainspeech, that SER
mon of yours this morning wasn't up to the
mark. 1t didn't affect me la the usual way"
No, said Parson Cushionduster, Il saw that
by your face. y
"Iiow could you tell ~ asked the elder.
"YoI kept awake all the time, - said the par
son.-BIrdette.
YOUNG SISSY ito Crowley's guardian)-Aw-
what do you give Mr. Crowley when he has
cold, aw?
Guardan-When it's not serious, sir, give
Young Sissy-Aw, don't believe in that sort
of treatment, aw-faxseed tea nevah did me
any good.
Guardan-That soP Then won't give Crow
ley any more of it.-NeD York sun.
81 SHOULD think you would cease to be an
umpire
"Whyy"
"Well, you're exposed TO all sorts of danger
You never know when you will be knocked out
by ball or mobbed by the spectators"
But think great deal Of my brother, and
| want to encourage him.
'What has that to do with it,"
"He is the coroner ~ omaha World.
| QUEER MOTIVE PowrR-Old Lady-D, Won
from New York TO Boston go by sOundg
Sharpley-Positive fact, madam, no question
about IL.
Old Lady-Goodness gracious! what a queer
motive power! What will they do next? First
they had sails then steam, then electricity and
now It s sound. / just reckon it's one of that
man Edisons Inventions No wonder they call
him The Wizard; he can do most anything
| Ocean.
''WHY, Smith, you look as if you had lost your
| last friend. What's the matter?''
Well, to tell you the truth, JONES' I'm com
| pletely strapped. l haven't earned q dollar for
| two months, and | have notion once in a
| while to jump into the river and end it, But
! I've got a mighty good thing if | can only make
| it work.
''What is it? should be glad TO helpy YOU"
II want to find publisher for book I've
| been writing on How to o Happy, Though
Wealthy 1t would go like hot cakes. y
| Springfield Union.