davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02
A Dishonest Employs.
Special to the Indianapolis Joufnsi. .

special 20 the IndianapoIis JouFnal.
NEW CASTLE, March 31.-Some two weeks
ago there came to this city young man giving
his name as Clarence Turner, who secured
position in @. A. Thornburgs meat market
Last night he went to the sho and robbed the
place of all the money in the irawer, amount
ing to about $50, and left the city. The robbery
not discovered until this morning. when the
market was opened. Investigation has SO far
failed TO reveal his whereabouts. He is thought
to be professional who is making business of
working buteher-shops in this way.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02
A Presidantiai rhonrh t.

Chicago Journal.
daniel. don't you think it would be grace
full action on my part. and one which would lead
to the healing of the many wounds which n
slant strife between the two parties has eneen-
dered, If appointed Republican TO that con-
sulshp at Hong Kongl 1t is great distance
away you know. Daniel" 1.-THE idea is a great
and generous SIRE" ''Then. Daniel, will
write and offer 1t to that man Ingalls,"
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02
Not Unlikely.

Boston Transcript
It is said. something worthy of remark,
that William L. Scott pays his cook twice the
salary which he himself receives as Congressman.
But then it should be remem bered that il la
barely possible that the cook is more of a sue
cess IL his line than Mr.. Scott is as a Congress-
man.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02

PhiIadeIphia Press.
The meanest man earth has been found.
He is mill owner in this city, whose name it 10
not necessary to give. His father died last
week. and he attended the funeral in company
with his only brother, whom he employed III hia
mill at $l2 week. When pay day came on
Saturday the younger brother found that the
time lost in burying the father had been deduct
ed from his wages by his brother.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02

Nhcago Jour nal
The Allan ia Constitution exclaims: sand is our
Uncle Joseph Madill really rip-snorting Demo
CRATE" We do not understand the precise mean
ing of the term 'rip-snorting" but If Geor-
gian contemporary means Republican who ad-
vocates Democratic principles, then ''our uncle"
certainly is ''rip-snorter"
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02
Steamship News.

New YORK. April Arrived Aurania. from
Liverpool: Trave, from Bremen; Amald and
Moravia, from Hamburg.
LosDoE, April 1.--Servia, for Liverpool,
passed Brow Head to-day The La Bourgogne
arrived at Havre to-day from New York. The
RhBtia, from New York, for Hamburg, was
signaled of the SciIly islaRds to day.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02
To Be Remembered.

Norristown Herald.
President Eliot of Harvard says that women
should never lecture to young men. The young
man who has experienced matrimony should
show this paragraph TO his wife when he returns
home at midnight from 'pool-room trust" or
something that way
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02
One of Life's Tragedies.

PhI1adeIphIa Record.
Can anything sadder be imagined than the
home-returning voyage of the father of the muir
derer Maxwell, who. having done all no could to
save his from the gallows. has sailed back
the sea with his great burden of hopeless
shame and prief2
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02
The journal, for Examplo.

Springfield Union.
Man wants but little here below and the sur
est way of getting what he wants is through the
advertising columns of good newspaper
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02
EIizabeth's Incendiary Talk.

Philadelphia Press.
Sister Stanton brings ridcule upon right
eous cause by such revolutionary talk. 1t is
almost enough to make even friends of that
cause cry 'Boo!" to the whole movement.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02

fsred with O. account Of heavy rains, and in
some localities Sse high winds have injured
crops. Reports froGa Arkansas indica te that
fruit has not been injuscd except in bottom
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02
DAILY WEATHER BULLETIN.
Indications.

WASHINGTON. D. c.. April 2. A. N.
For Illinois and Indiana-Colder, generally
fair weather; light to fresh winds, becoming
northerly.
For Ohio-Colder threatening weather, with
light rains, followed by fair weather, except
warmer on tae lakes; fresh to brisk winds, be-
coming westerly.
For Michigan and Wisconein-Colder, fair
weather, preceded in Michigan by local rains Or
snow; light to fresh northwesterly winds.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02
ILLINOIS.

Sensational Disclosures Regslfdine Gang or
Young Girl Thieves. X
CARTHAGE, April The sensational discow-
cry has just been made that the Wholesale rob-
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02

WHAT'S better for q wound than Salvation
DIN Echo answers: What" We answers
Nothing
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02
The Kentucky Yerstor

Minneapolis Evening Journal.
New meaning of the verb Dicktate-to go tx
Canada.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02
WEATHER. AND CRoPs.

Cooler Than Usual in the Mississippi valley
Excess of Rainfall East of the Rockies.
WAsHINGToN. April 1.-The follow ing is the
weather and crop bulletin for the week ended
Saturday, March 81. 1858.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02
the DTeanest Man ROUND.

eether the second time the judge said, i'm
Pressively: The greatest man 1 ever knew was
Roger B. Taney"
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02

Traces of precipitation.
Note-One-tenth of an inch of melted snow EQUALS
one inch of snow.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-04-02
Local Weather Report.
INDIANAPOLIS, April /, 1883.


Following is comparative statement of the eondi-
ton of temperature and precipitation April 1,
The South western news., 1888-01-11
The Latest Barber Shop Jote.

Have you heard the Latest gag?
Well, this is it. You go into a
barber shop or cigar store and press
emily somebody will begin talking
batj and after awhile the man who
works the trick will get round to
the point where he ask@you il you
have ever seen red bat. OF
course you answer no. Then he
asks you if yJu would like to see
a red bat. You say that you don't
mind, and he goes back IN the
shop and brings forward a paper
box, carefully tied and plentifuIly
perforated with holes. He begins
to unite and you grow nervous and
alarmed lest the bat makes it's es-
cape. If you are foolish enough
to say Look out, or he'll fly a.
wayP then you get the laugh on
YOU for the joker will uncover
the boz and show YOU red bat
sure enough red bricl;bat. Globe
Democrat.
The South western news., 1888-01-11
He Had a Remedy.
Arkansaw Treveler. /

In Court Lawyer Ito Judge
-"Your honor, this client of
mine, well>known druggist should
be liberated"
Upon what grounds? He has
violated the law, and why should
he not be punished"
"That shall be clearly demon,
stated. Several days ago | went
into his store and asked for GER
tain patent medicine. After an
extensive search he discovered
that the medicine was not III the
house. lie simply stated that he
did not have it, and strange IS it
may seem, he dill not claim to
have a remedy OF his own manu-
tacture that was much better than
the medicine / had called for. /"
"That was indeed. strange"
the judge replied, "and it surely
entities your client to merciful con.
sideration, but still it is my duty
to punish him.
"Ysur homer, I beg of you tpre-
fleet. He is the only man that has
not compounded a sure cure for
dyspepsia.
Then by5ssics & lg I....,.,.. he
shall go fee. NY dear sir, : adj
dressing th$ druggist, "you are a
rerharkablg and upright man. As
a dyspeP1c Lakave been imposed
upon bY4- saes
Have you gof dyspepsia" eS-
claimed the prisoner.
Eyes,
Then it is fortunate for you
That we have become acquainted.
-, 1l e 4 y sIeHasdy, sir, that was
peTe fail. l make it
myself, ali
"Iiere," said, the judge, address,
ing an officer, take that man to
jail"
The South western news., 1888-01-11
Az Unexpected ign!Ion.
Augusta News

Aagris:a Nows-]
A good story comes frpm Quit
man, Ga. The other day negro
camc into town and rot drunk aid
commenced to enliven the streets
By whooping and praneing around
With ham under his arm. A POI
liceman attempted to arrest him,
when he struck tho negro on the
head. and the next instant pop
ping sound was heard and the mes
gro's wool became all ablaze and
burned fercely. Such an unusual
sight frightened the policeman,
and thinking he had struck an
electric man he took to his heels,
and the negro, imagining the POI
liceman had vooddooed him with
some kind OF magic fre-strick, also
became frantic with fear, and dart
ed Oft in an opposite direction,
bowling like a mailman and clucth>
ing wildly at his blazing wool. The
citizens of the town were startled
by the strange occurrence, and it
was not until all the negro's wool
was consumed and he had stopped
running that the cause of the con-
fagration was Dissolved. 1t appears
that the negro, as is quite COM
mon with his race, was in the hab-
1t of carrying mathces in his hair,
and She blow from the policeman 5
club ignited a parlor match and
started a fire, which frightened a
dutiful officer out of his wits and
will render a bibulous colored citi :
zen as bald as a stove lid for the
remainder ofhis life.
The South western news., 1888-01-11
The Tired Boots


A little Boston boy, aged 6, is of
very fnmagiantive temperament.
Quite recently his mother noticed
that at bed time each night he laid
his little boots together upon their
sides, instead of setting them ups
right.
Pray tell me why YOU always
place your boots that way?'said
mamma; and the child replied:
Because they must be tired
walking SO much an day l lay
them sideways 50 they can rest. "
Springfield Republican.
The South western news., 1888-01-11
A 1eaa Trick.

Say, wasn't 1t mean trick?'
he asked of an officer on Fort stree.
east yesterday.
What was thlt?'
Turned me out doors To-day
~ h6Y
Man up there at the workhouse.
Came right in this morning and
said my time was out and I'd have
to so, Christmas or no Christmas.
| was laying out for that dinner
Tomorrow, aud here / am turned
out on the streets to fish for a free
lunch! Can poor man get JUS
tice in this country?
The South western news., 1888-01-11
A Pathological Question Before the Lin
Kim cI0b.
Detroit Free Prcs,.1

Detroit Free Pres.
Colonel Carthagena Smith arose.
to make an inquiry He was nai
present at the last meeting, owing
to rush of blood to the head, and
he wanted to inquire if it would be
the future policy of the club 10 ig>
more the go" as in o'day and o'clock.
also if thesbis Wis u
ofatlte Aanles fiau
van, etc
dad If De club.
Kurnel SIND replied Brother
Gardner. Dis claN has cot dun
foolin' wild de English language,
an from dis time it ar gwine right
down frew de shucks to de kernel.
II Mr.. Brien's maine amt good lluif
without a big so befo den
neither at anJlaadg name
If | doan' need one befo mine he
kin git along visllouE his. II lear
proper to say O'clock, den it it ar
proper . he gwine to take
dc q streea Yar down to de o'bank
to draw I'll D eheck for seben o'doI>
lars, De policy u CRY club viii 81
to knock de linen buster al sIe
English language 10 ct riaht al
&c meat St an to spell our
W. w9ros lla 6 So est way, no iiiaster
WEBSTER nor odder<@Hite man
thinks about ID II a pussou has
got s-taf why mt SAY 50 without
rainblin' Al oles lie kentry to spell
it, an i everybody ar' gwine to
call it 'shusar why not put dc
IL in dar?
AT de kIoze Of de las meetin'
sum pussoiis to me unknown,
knocked my plug hat off de hook
an slept on her sich anodder
circumstance will result in de ut
mos dreariness fur de offender.
LIT rs now break up de meetin, an
go home.
The South western news., 1888-01-11

There is neither cause nor ex--
euse for faltering on the part Of
Democratic representatives in Com
gress. Tariff reform is the issue,
and any measure involving sac
rifce of this principle would not
be acceptable to the country.
Stand manfully by the Presi.
dent and all will be well.
The South western news., 1888-01-11
IN fine conditisn.

Maid (to mistress James the
footman, says, mum, as what he
caught cold last night an has
very stiff neck.
Mistress-tell him to have the
carriage at the door, Marie, in
half an hour. l have some Shop
ping to do. Turning to daugh-
ter)-For once, my dear, 1 think
James viii be able to hold his
head as | have endeavored to teach
him to. New York Sun,
The South western news., 1888-01-11
4 General Sa,pton.
Texas siftings.]

Texas Slftlngs.
The Texas journalist who had
been summer following himself on
a stock ranch for a couple of years.
suddenly assumed control of a
country weekly, and in the Grst is.
sue after he struck the quarter
deck he published a small and un-
pretentious card, in which he said:
"Thc former editor of this sheet
is practically and politically dead,
but the Sausage still survives. 1t
is just as well, though, and a
mighty sight better, as 1 am a hoss
ait edith and sling one of the most
caustic and fnentist quilts west of
Red River. | have a record be-
hind me which does 1T need new
coat of whitewash every spring,
like that other editor which pc,
yunked and drawed out of the
game.
cat gittin' up obituaries Tn a
tossel top, and if there's any hitch
in the programme | can generally
furnish fresh corpse on short no,
! tice, and at the usual slight adj,
vance on cost Of insertion. / mere-
y i t ths9w cut feelen the
opposishun which hear is smash.
ing it forces agin me and my pa
per, and by the freckeled- faced,
bow>legged, cock>eyed gods of war
there'll be power of high priced
opera music floating in the air If
any them try to climb me.
f there is emmy corte house
ring in this sweet scented locality.
Ill get on to ic, sure as -gou IRE
foot high. IftAeres to be elsRyA
munkeying with the free,born, lin.
trameled country delegates to the
next county convention, Ill be
there with my face washed and hair
combed back Of my ears.
"I'ye licked may good man,
and I've been licked in my varie-
gated career, but Eve always no.
ticed that them fellers who whips
ped me were MT the same men af.
terwari, and dropped along for a
while like sun struck tomatovine,
and finally dropped into the grave
with dull thud, having kinder
outliyed their usefulness.
81 want it distinctly understood
that I'm in from the back coun-
tries, and amt up to the cote etikit
OF the strawberry blonde or the
PUPPY dude. If [ make any mis-
cues it will be more an error of the
head than the heart; but for all
that, | propose to FUN d jam up
sizziug hot, nifty little paper, and
move along with the best of har.
mony. But if harmony bucks,and
tries to throw any dirt on me, har.
mony will have to get off the track
and leave me to glide right into
the confidence of the public.
IF this journal says anything
outot the way and grieves any
mottle faced tenderfoot, remember
I'm the man he wants to see about
itF There amt no back stairs or
back Winders to this sanctum sane.
forum, I'm ever on the tripod.
and now, With these few brief re-
marks | cordially invite every
body's corporation and subscrip-
tons. The tone of the paper will
he pure in sentiment, chaste in
expression and geographically,
hang up and deliriousa
The South western news., 1888-01-11
The Great Test.
Chicago Tribune

1t is not too much to say that
the fate of the next election is in
the hands of eo&giess. TTIEscy'1l.srty
which shows the most aptitude for
meeting the questions OF the day is
morally certain to be intrusted with
the reins of power next time. Old
issues are rusty and moribund.
The people are alert to see which
party grasps with frmest hand and
sees with clearest eye the vital is
sues Of current politics.
The South western news., 1888-01-11
a Stand for Principle.
Isw DIRK WOrId.1

ew DIRK World.
The Democratic party, through
traditions, its platform and its
Eeiit, IS committed TO these
pies
The government has no con-
81 stoned or moral right to collect
are nne iii excess Of the needs of
solnical administration. I'M
ary taxation Is unjust taxa
ion Unjust taxation is tyranny,
whether imposed in monarchy or
i repablic.
2. A surplus in the treasury Is
a national evil, and MAY become a
national peril. 1t Is a standing
temptation to extravaganza, 1t
may perpetuate high taxes for a
long period BY leading to the ins
auguration of expenditures that
viii be continuous. The way to
deal with a surplus is to stop its
collection.
3. The taxes to be first abated
are those which bear heaviest on
the greatest number of people /;
namely, taxes upon universal ne4
cessities and the essentials of par
ufactures, Hence. TIC food, fuel,
shelter and clothing of the people,
and the raw materials of manufac-
ture should be fist relieved in any
reduction of taxation.
These are Democratic principles.
They SHOULD constitute the Demo
cratic policy. Whatever compro.
mise may be required to secure the
best attiinable result, it is the bus
mess Of craftsmanship to make.
Craftsmanship has been defined to
be the science of tlte practical,
and the practical duty before Con.
gress is the prevention o. the SUR
plus.
But the President is entitled to
the thanks of the country and to the
united support of his purity in his
courageous stand tor sound prin-
ciples.
The South western news., 1888-01-11

1t the postmasters throughout
the country should enforce the law
in regard to the delivery of letters
to parties through the postofice,
unless by orders oftheir parents or
guardians. Here is the law as It
reads; CAN letters addressed to
girls under IS years of age, or
boys under p years of age, will be
placed in care of their parents or
guardians
The South western news., 1888-01-11

It hats been decided in the Uni-
ted States district court that the
usury laws caunot be evaded by
calling a part Of the interest a
commission for negotiating the
loan This verdict will seriously
effect the Corbin Banking Go,
and other Loan Associations do.
ing business in this state.'
The South western news., 1888-01-11

Coffee is highly recommended as
a deodorizer. In cases where rats
Of mice die in spaces between the
floor of dwellings, a pound or two
of coffee will speedily produce the
desired effect. 1t is incomparably
superior in sick chamber to most
other disinfectants; it has a bene-
fetal chemical action on the ats
mosPhere,' besides giving out an
agreeable perfume.
The South western news., 1888-01-11

10 make a strong cement mix
some finely powdered rice with cold
water, SO as to form soft pate. -
Add boiling water and finally boil
the mixture in pan for one or two
minutes,
The South western news., 1888-01-11

w B Richmond, the English arr
fist who is now in Berlin painting
a portrait Of Prince Bismarck, DIES.
cribes the Iron Chancellor as one
Of the best sitters IN the world. Men
and nations Who have been sar1ip%
ON by Bismarck will coincide With
this opinoini.'
The South western news., 1888-01-11
Home, Sweet Home.

Magistrate (sternly to tramp :
The address You give as your place
of residence is a vacant lot.
Tramp-Yes, yer honor; that's
where sleep nights. Puck.
The South western news., 1888-01-11
And another Han Held IT.?

There goes my house and So,
600 mortgage, said the owner of a
burning house as the crowd stood
watching che flames bursting from
the windows.
~ by, if you know in what part
OF the house is is, You might save
the mortgage-the FIRE hasn't made
much Roadway down. stairsg cried
IA bystander.
In Whit part of the house p
Why, man alive, its all over
itp
The South western news., 1888-01-11
Had No Horn 10 Blow.
Tribune of Rome.l

Tribune of Rome.]
There is one preacher who has a
friend ii the Waycross Headlight.
Says that paper: eve have often
accused the Savannah News OF
stealing items from us, but we new
er knew until recently that it
would even attempt to rob a poor
preacher OF his name. 1t did,
however. The name of this ap,
pointee for the Lowndes circuit is
'Hombuckle,' and the News put it
Buckle thus depriving him t his
Horn, in case he wanted to blow
it himself. Let the News be
arraigned for trial.N
The South western news., 1888-01-11

G w d., Nantucket county :
Mass, says eggs for Matching
should be kept so as to prevent the
evaporation of moisture through
the pores of the shell as much as
possible. If the eggs have to be
kept any length of time it is best
to place them with the larger end
upwards, in a box with some
bran,
The South western news., 1888-01-11
Nonh q Poet.

New York World.
A magazine writer asks if there
were any antediluvian poets.
There was one at Leaf. Noah
formed a good many couplets lust
before the food,
The South western news., 1888-01-11
10 MY MOTHER

The following lines, which we
find in an old book, were written
by a convict of the Ohio Penitentil
airy, and are touchingly beaus
tifu.
I've wandered tar from thee mother
Far from my happy home;
I've left the land that gave me birth
In other climes to roam;
And time, since then, has rolled
lis years,
And marked them on my brow,
Yet | have often thought of thee
Tn thinking of thee now.
I'm thinking of the day, mother,
When at my tender sidej
You watched the dawniug of my
youth,
And kissed me in your pride
Then brightly was nay heart lit up
With hopes of future joy,
w lille your bright fancy honors
wo9ei
To deck your darling boy.
I'm thinking of the Gay, mother,
When, with anxious care;
You lifted up your heart to heaven;
Your bore, your truth was therej
Sad memory brings your parting
words,
White tears fold down your
cheek
Nour long, last loving look told more
Than ever WORKS could speak.
I'm tar away from thee, mother,
No friend is near me now,
To soothe me with tender word,
Or cool my aching brow;
The dearest ties affection Wove,
IRE now all torn from mel
They left me when the trouble
came
nd
They did not love like thee.
I'm lonely and torslkcn now;
UnpitieI and unhlest;
Yet still | would not let You know
lIfw soreIy I'm distressed;
I klit'w you would not cbidc me
mother,
know YOU would not blame,
Hut soothe MIC with your tender
words,
And bill me hope again.
twould not have thee know, mother,
How brightest hopes decays
The t'mpter with his baleful cup,
Has dashed them all away;
And shame has left its venomef
sting,
To rack with anguish Wild
On, no! | would not have thee
know
Tie sorrow Of thy child.
Oh! | have wandered far, mother
Since | deserted thee,
Aud left thy trusting heat to
break,
Beyond the deep blue sea;
Oh :! mother, still | love thee well; !.
Would | could hear thee speak,
And feel again thy balmy breath
Upon my careworn cheek.
But, ah! there is thought, mother,
Pervades my bleeding breast,
That thy freed spirit may have
flown
To its eternal rest;
And while wipe the tear away,
There whispers in my ear
A voice that speaks Of heaven and
thee,
And bids me meet thee there.
The South western news., 1888-01-11
rny,h the Ointment.
Tribune of Rome.

10 our merchants. Don't send
in the bill for the present the Low,
ing wife bought for her husband
until the new year is fairly started.
Give the old man a chance for a
little pleasure before showing him
the fiv in the ointment.
The South western news., 1888-01-11

The pruning of vines has been
investigated by H Mueller, who
finds that the proper time is while
the fruit is ripening, and that the
young shoots should be cut, as
their development requires much
sugar. ~
The South western news., 1888-01-11
Greater fool Esaau.
New Orleans States. !

The negro who thrawed out a
dynamite cartridge is not half so
great a fool as the republican who
is trying to make himself believe
that a reduction of the tariff will
defeat the democratic party next
year.