St. Landry democrat. (Opelousas, La.) 1878-1894, 1888-02-04
LoNG-NoSED GENTLEMEN.
a Silver HaIf-Dol1ar Makes q Curious
Tour Around the World.

Tour Around the World.
There lived in Saco, Me-, many
years ago a man named Jerry Cold
ridge, who had an unearthly Ions
nose. This extended probosci
troubled him so much that he made {
VOW that when he met man who hae
longer one he would present hin
with silver half-dollar, with the pro
viso that the man who got the half
dollar was to do likewise when hi
came across man who was superior
in this line to himself.
When jerry appeared in public hi
was greeted with all kinds of compli
ments upon the size of his nose. and
it got to be a common thing for him te
be saluted with, Hello. Jerry! how's
your figure head7" Oh, swell, pump
handle, how do you wag to-day" and
kindred remarks.
When the cold north wind came
down from among the Maine lakes il
took particular delight in caressing
the end Of. jerry proboscis, painting
it garnet red and making it ting like
carpenters thumb hit with ham
mer Jerry's friends advised him t.
have fur muff made to carry his horr
in, and told him that he should take
service with the Government as fog
signal. .n"
One day Jerry went to Portland, and
when he returned he was greeted W it'll:
odd plowshare, have you turned VI
to-dayp'
WELL" said Jerry, quivering with
excitement and joy, Il have seem q
man in Portland who had longer
nose than have.''
Impossible said his friends,
''there isn't another such nose on the
face of the earth
':All right" said Jerry. eff you
don't believe me / will exhibit the
documents to prove it" At this he
produced receipt which read:
Received from jeremiah Coldridge fifty cents
in consideration of having longer nose than
he has. JAMES BALLARD.
THAT half dollar" said Jerry, 'shas
gone to Smyrna on a merchantmen,
and I'll tell you how it happened: ]
went to hotel to get my dinner, and
as sat down at the table saw man
sitting opposite me who gazed at me
with what I took to be an insolent
stare. When got good look at him
! forgot my deformity, and immedi-
ately reached my hand across the table
and said:
g Shake. neighbour. I believe ]
owe you fifty cents.
:" 'How's that?' says he.
Well, says !. i have made a
vow that if / ever met man who had
a longer nose than I have I would
give him a half a dollar. provided he
would do the same when he met
man whose nose discounted his A
once the whole dinin groom was in ar
uproar of laughter, and the stranger
said: IT'S a bargain. Pulling out his
note book he wrote the receipt and ]
gave him a. half dollar. I afterward
learned that he was captain of
packet ship outward bound fol
Smyrna, Syria
After this Jerry had peace about his
long nose, and the silver half dollar
was taken by Captain Ballard to
Smyrna There 1t was turned over to
an English mate of an East Indiaman
bound through the Suez Canal to
Madras. The Englishman carried it
for several years, and finally landed in
San Francisco, where he, having
hard streak of luck, enlisted in the
United States regular Earmy, and
went up among the Blackfeet Indians,
near Fort Benton, where he was made
a prisoner.
After being tortured in every con-
ceivable way by the Indians, they cut
off his nose and set him at liberty. He
finally drifted to Boston, and as he
was walking one day on Washington
street, who should he meet but Jerry.
Having heard from Captain Ballard
now he came in possession Of the sill
yer piece, he recognized Jerry.
'.Hellot said he; lis your name Jerry
1oldridge?''
That's my NAME" said Jerry.
Il am happy to meet you" said the
en- glishman. ALLOW me to return to
vou the half dollar you loaned Cap
ain James Ballard five years ago.
carried it around the world with me,
md never found man with a nose as
ong as mine was; but have, as you
lee, lost mine now. and I think the
tinker belongs to you"
Jerry and the English mate became
asst friends and went into business to-
,ether and when you go into little |
tore on Dock square, in Boston, you
will see the funny spectacle of one of |
he partners with a nose as long as
our hand and the other partner With |
10 nose at all.-M r Press.