Idaho news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1887-1891, 1888-07-07
The BAT


regarded as belonging to the bird fam
lily. Fortunately for mankind, saVant
examined the skeleton of a bat and to
his utter amazement discovered that
the bat was using The skeleton of
quadruped. instead Of that Of bird.
As it is not likely that any quadruped
would lend his own skeleton TO the bat
it was taken for granted that the skele-
ton the bat was using was his own pri-
vate skeleton. Ever since this discoV-
cry the bat has been classed among
the quadrupeds. for quadrupcds and
birds are not in the habit OF using each
others skeletons in a promiscuous
manner.
The bat has a very keen sense of
smell. Persons entering old buildings
infested with bats are obliged to hold
their noses. The bat is also useful in
restraining the multiplication Of noe
turnal insects. that is, of some noctur-
nal insects that fly around out doors.
The flight of the bat is erratic. being
zigzag. like unto the course Of man
coming home from the lodge. When
you see a bat fly for the FIRST time you
are satisfied that he has been taking
too much gin, without smelling his
breath.
As bats are very plentiful in Texas
they are sometimes used in shooting
matches instead of pigeons. 1t is very
difficult 10 shoot a bat on the wing,
owing to his zigzag flight The secret
of shooting bats on the wing was
discovered by man who participated
in shooting match while in beastly
state of intoxication. AS no sober
man can hit bat on the wing, bat
shooting has become very popular. In
Austin, Texas. it has become a craze.
For shooting bats any brand of tangle-
foot whisky will answer the purpose.
The bat is like the leading lady in
church choir. He can't sing. The bat
never tries 10 sing but the lady does.
Hurrah for the bat! The bat is not
well up in base ball, but he goes out
on the fly almost as regularly as the
New York batters did at Chicago last
summer, when they didn't care much
whether they won the championship
or not
The bat lives principally on flies.
He eats almost as many flies as the man
who boards at restaurant The bat
eats flies because he likes them. The
man at the restaurant eats flies because
be is hungry and there is not much
else on the table. Although the bat
/ movements are almost identical with
those of an inebriate, yet he, the bat
never bumps himself against anything.
He never adorns the stove with por-
tons of his cutical while he is hunting
match, nor does he fracture the back
of chair with the bridge of his nose
while trying TO pick himself up from
the floor. For the reason that the bat
never bumps himself against obstruc-
tions. scientists say that he has the
sixth sense Why should the bat, who
never ocmes home drunk, have the
sixth sense. while aman, who very
often comes home tight, loses his
senses and breaks up the furn iture with
his person?
How inscrutable are the ways of
Providence. How past finding outl
In parts of South America there are
said TO be large bats, called VAN
pircs. that suck tho life blood from the
feet of their sleeping victims. Col.
0chiliree vouches for the truth of this
story. He says that some ten years
ago, while he was in Brazil. he put up
job on a vampire. He. 0chiltree.
was lying-that is lying down, aud
pretending to be asleep. The vam-
pire alighled at Col. ochiltree's feet.
and carefully untying the strings of
the Colonel's shoes, which were tied in
several hard knots, removed his stock
ings preparatory to sucking his blood.
when the Colonel unexpectedly awoke
and buried his glitteriug falchion in
vampires vitals. As concession to
the incrcdulous. Col. ochiltree still ex-
hibits the falchion. = TEXAS SyliHgs.