Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-02-11
SOYE RURAL NOTES.
"Oabriolst" Gives the Latest Happenings
Of News from Sidemeat Com
munity, Ohio.
fhe Movements, Social and Unsoeial, OF
Prominent Ct,isens-Parties, Flu.
nerais aud Personals Neatly
Wrote Up.

nerais aud Personals Neatly
Wrote Up.
S.DEMEAT COMMUNITY, o., Feb. ..
Ed. OF THIS PAPER:-In entirely over
looking your valuable paper l see that yo
have no correspondent from this place, 50
thought that rs am recognized as the onl
party in town who can write his own sigma
ture grammaticaliy. would write you
few notes. would just As leave you woul,
publish them rs not; but il you do. pleas
don't monkey with any OF the language. a
it ,s Just about the way want il, woult
have written on only one side Of the paper
but I did not know which side you pre-
ferred.
You can put these items IN any size type
you please. and let the printer who sets ths
type put them anywhere in the paper thai
comes handy. Don't crowd out any adver
tisemen,s with them. Advertisements are
not So readable As my items. but they ill
MP more space. and that is what under
stand you editors have q rough. sorrOwful
and difficult time trying to do. Without
any further rejoinder l will write YOU ten
items which have reported. and several of
the latest news.
Mr.. John Hill has Just returned from
Silvert0n, where he went In order 10 attend
the funeral Of . relative. who is now dead.
John looks well and hearty and reports .
pleasant time.
The Widow Juke's bee-house Is all
broken out with hives. To the editor
This is not true. but I thought that any
humor that l might shed would increase
the circulation OF your paper. II you do
not use il will just mention that l shall
send the same joke to the Scorchtown
Evening Bat, which has frequently written
TO me and tried to negotiate to have the
Joke published In pamphlet form. You
know your own business best, undoubt-
lessly.
Mr.. Skunk" Peters Is confined to his
bed with bad case OF snakes. His wife
ID doing the best washing ever seen in this
place. and Is so much attached 10 her pro-
fession that she frequently works until late
at night at II. skunk" Is . good fellow
and deserves success.
A very pleasant party was given night
before last at the residence of our esteemed
fellow-tOwnsman, Mr.. Booze" Corduroy.
The occasion was Mr.. C.'s fOrty-second
birthday. but he did not seem to care. L,
was . surprise party. and was got up spcn-
taneous. Mr.. Corduroy is in the habit Of
percolating up town during the evening.
and not coming back until sometime In
the future. In order TO increase the spor.
Of the evening and insure his presence Mrs
Corduroy. who r. frail. backward woman,
went up to Booze" about O'Clock in the
afternoon and hit him three or four ciOnts in
<~Ns a. Nr y. niv,ss f.l Of
this treatm mt accomp anied by the rest Of his
syst-m. Ars Corduroy then tred her hus.
band down cellar 10 keep fresh and coo,
till the guests cnmmenced 10 accumulate.
which they did about seven in the evening.
The refreshments were largely attended.
About O'Clock Booze" Was brought up
from the cellar. and Immediately recovered
his cOmpOsure. but was longer recovering
the cornerstone Of his pants. which had
been lost while he was attempting To climb
out Of window In order t. rejoin the eli
mate on the outside. Booze" shook hands
with ali the guests, and then went upstairs
70 take the cobw.bs off his teeth.
All the society OF the place was there ex
elusive Of the writer who was present. but
do . not wish to supereroxate his social be
Quipnents or assume uicre than he pre
sends- Dan Gebbins was there. and Wa
much sought after during the evening By |
Constable Flaps two daughters, and BY |
their father. Miss Maria Small was there. |
dressed in . snOrtinx. stylish frOck OF yel |
loo gOods pretty much trimmed out al
sight We are pleased to zee that Mi.s
Maria Is not 81 fieckled as she vas pefort |
the brindle calf Bit her ear Of Bill Gili-ys !
Who writes items from this place for the |
ScOrchtown Evening Bat was present but |
MT APtfuE I'm fhs
b Was drunken. Bill has one foot in a
drunkard's grave; this +xhausts the cubic |
contents Of the grave. Bill isn't bad f-l
Low outside Of the fact he is q putrid liar
and dassent fool around me. The party |
Was the greatest social success We have had |
since the Smith murder.
Dad Hamilton. who Is accused Of steal
ing Jake Cutcombs sorrel mare. Is still In
jail at this point Dad demands suspen-
sion OF public opinion, while on the other
hand public opinion demands . suspen-
sion Of Dad.
The town council should awake out OF
its iethargy and have load of gravel put
on Kunn-ll avenus. These men were
elected BY the suffrsges Of the people. By
all means. the general public should have
the gravel.
We are indebted to Mr.. John Barkus. the
genial and accomplished tonsorial artist of
Muck street for about the cleanest shave
70 ever remember having peeled away
mon our features. We have q hard. brit
tie beard. ana yet Mr.. Bsrkus cut IT off
without cutting US but twice. and that Wa
owing TO the fact that We were regretfully
to sneeze during the ceremony.
Mr.. Barkus makes a specially OF cutting
Oh moles and removing superfiuous flesn
n tSn nf !