The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1888-06-29
A WIFE FOR A WINK.
Mr. Sandon's Unfortunate Infirm-
ity, and What It Did for Him.

ity, and What It Did for Him.
In imitation of Victor Hugo's L'hon,-
ne Qui RI (the man who laughs).
had almost decided to call this story
1.-The Man Who Winks," and besides
to write the title in French: but seri.
Gus obstacle presented itself. I could
not think of the French for wink"
(oh, yes. the French have word for
''wink." no doubt of that; my Eng
lish-French dictionary was not at hand
Git was fully four feet away. so was
compelled to coniine myself to plain
English. which. after all. is good
enough for anybody.
But the man who winks. He is-or
rather was, for the events I am about
to relate occurred a number of years
agc-tolerably good looking. He
thought himself that he was very good
looking. and perhaps lie would have
been if it were not for the popularity
of his eye-his right eye. This eye
was somewhat larger than the other.
and rounder. almost circular in shape;
and whenever he looked suddenly at
any one. or had his attention drawn
suddenly toward any thing. this eye
would invariably close. as if to focus
itself upon the object in question.
This optical peculiarly may have
come upon him originally in the form
of habit which he heedless!y foster
ed. and which he found. to his sorrow.
he could not rid himself of when he
wished to.
So it is with all habits We acquire
them; they serve us for awhile; then
we wish to throw them of. but we find
VIC can not. They become engrafted.
so to speak, into our natures SO indis-
solubly rs to form almost part of our
dispositions; then. try rs hard as we
may. we can not remove them anv
more than we can those feelings that
IRE born within us
Stephen SandOn found this deformity
of his eye \ serious obstacle to his hap
piness Especially did it bring him
sorrow in his dealings with the gentler
sex with whom perfect figure counts
more than any thing else in winning
their appreciation. 1t must have been.
to say the least extremely provoking
10 Stephen. and extremely laughable
to the lady, when in the midst of a
serious conversation that terrible orbit
would experience a total and instan-
saneous eclipse. Sometimes perhaps
it would serve to add force to the con-
versation, but generally it didn't To
be sure. there were chances in favor
of its speaking more than words could;
but unfortunately for Sandon. it
could not be relied upon with any
thing like accuracy to act at the proper
moment. Thus. in condoling with any
one visited by sorrow. a wink might
not prove fitting accompaniment to
words; whereas. one under happier cir
cumstanccs would not be SO noticeable.
so it will easily be seen that the pecui-
iarity of Stephen Sandon's right eye
was not an enviable possession; and no
one felt the truth of this fact with
greater force than Sandon himself.
As may be supposed. Sandon's mis-
fortune brought him no little sorrow
besides that which mere ownership
caused him. What he may have suf-
fered when boy it does not concern
us in the present narrative, and we will
pass on to an event that proved to be
the turning point in Sandon's exist
ence.
One afternoon while strolling along
the street he met young lady. The
instant the left eye caught sight of her.
the right one. following its usual Gus
tom. behaved in very shocking laan-
ner. The upper lid came down to Areet
the lower one. and the lower one as
cended to meet the upper one. the
whole action forming what is called q
-.wink."
The young lady against whom these
attentions were directed. stopped short
and gazed at him whom she believed
had insulted her
''What do you mean, sir?' she said
Indignantly.
Sandon, the innocent offender,
stopped. too. on hearing these words.
and intended to explain and apologize.
but unfortunately for him his irrepress-
ible eyes acted before he could speak.
and drove al thought of apology out
ct his head. besides increasing the