The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1888-12-05
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

In everybody's mouth Teeth.
The glazier generally has pane in his
chest.
The dressmaker's draper should ho
quick at figures.
Working like ahorse-A lawyer draw
ing conversation.
Hearts may be honest, but they are
always on the beat.
The rising eneration-Folks getting
up in the morning.
Why is a doctor mover seasick2-ne ia
used to see sickness.
Sometimes in a trade man kicks
when there is nothing to boot
The woman question which women
are opposed to-"How old are youl"
1t is not generally known that the
wheels of a vehicle are tired as the horse.
A pig was never known to wash, but
great many people have seen the pig
iron.
In a question of life and death there
are two sides to take-This side and
that side.
1t is now believed that Venus rose.
from the sea to allow the hired girl to
make the bed of the ocean. Detroit Free
Press.
"Ah," said the fly, as it crawled
around the bottle, II have passed
through the Matching age, the creeping
age, and now am in the mucilagen
then it stuck.
Customer Ito waiter)-' Some cheese,
please" Waiter-"Beg pardon, sir;
| eli aho - otr
tomer--"That sol When do you expect
it aclSi"-Lye.
The title of book which lies before
us-"Twenty Thousand Leagues Under
the Sea"-suggests that the submarine
development of the national game has
assumed the character of craze.
''Dad can tell the time without look
ing at his watch" said little Johnnie.
"When l ask him in the morning he
says it is time to get up, and when ask
him at night he says it is time to go to
bed. "--NeaO York San.
GLOW are you getting along" asked
| one cyclone OF another. ''About ninety
miles an hour. Ilows YOURSELF" 80,
/ manage to keep things moving an
swered Cy. No. 1, and blew town into
the lake. -Detroit Free Press.
II is said to be dangerous to attend
church when there is "great gun" in
! the pulpit, ''minor canon" in the
reading desk, when the bishop ''charges
the clergy" and when the choir ''mur-
ders an anthem. "-Deirvtt Free Press.
There was confusion in the faces of
George and Matilda, who sat in intimate
proximity on the sofa, as Harry entered.
| 10 fpof fr hfr cfalf-
possession. She said-''We are engaged
in a little game at cards" Harry
s'And mighty close game, too, chg"--
Boston Transcript.
Robert j. Burdette recently received
notification at Livingston, Mon, that u
dead registered letter awaited his orders
at Washington. He sent the following
reply: "lf the letter referred to isn't so
dead that it is offensive you might send
the remains to Burlington, Iowa, where
/ will claim the mummy in about a
month. "-Me,o York Post.
''Miss Maud, " he said, Il have come
| in this evening to ask you question,
and have brought airing with me- Now,
before yuu try 1t on / want to tell you
| that if you feel inclined to be sister 20
me | will have to take il back, as my
father objects TO my sister wearing such
large diamonds And Maud said She
would keep the ring. = Jeloslers We HI
A Fine Compliment husband "rro-
fessor Widehead paid you very line
compliment after dinner last night my
dear" Wife; "Oh, did heg What did
/ he say2n Husband Gle said that J on
weren't handsome, but you we're one of
the most intelligent women he ever met"
| Wife. Professor What's-his- has
received his last invitation from me. -