The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1888-03-28
Some Virginia Yarns.

In the mountains of Virginia and
West Virginia, after the war. story-tell-
ing was the one feast of reason and in
tellectual pastime. The mountaineers
were never an educated race. During
the period of the rebellion they were
cut off entirely from all newspapers,
books, and periodicals. They knew
absolutely nothing of what was going
on in the world. They lived in little
circle by themselves. When they got
best story was the acknowledged lead
er. Wit was cultivated by personal
encounter in the country store, in the
tavern bar-room, and before the great
fireplaces in the cabins. One of the
characters of the decade after the war,
about whom West Virginians occasion
ally talk, was a certain Capt. Mosier.
His fund OF stories never ran out. A
friend said to him: Captain, if you
were educated you would be big man.
Said the Captain: "Yes, and if / had
lived in deep water L would have been
whale"
The story is told of Capt. Mosier
that on one occasion he had been i'm
billing at the country tavern to an ex-
tent that gave unsteadiness to his loco
motion. 1t was a stormy night, and
terrible thunder-shower was in prog
ress as he started for home. His path
way lay up the mountain and across
deep gorge, over slender bridge, be-
meath which ran turbulent mountain
stream. swollen by the falling rain.
The Captain had strug gled along to this
with difficulty. When he reached the
bridge he threw himself down on all
fours and began to creep across the
narrow structure. The flashes of light
ming gave him occasional views of the
path across, and he waited for these
flashes before making any advances.
His crossing was thus made By stages.
Just after binding fash of lightning
he lost his hold and fell into the stream.
1T was terrible plunge, and his
chances for life were extremely doubt
full. Some of his companions who had
followed him from the tavern heard
his cry as he struck the water. They
plunged into the gorge in spite of the
danger, and found him clinging to a
rock below the bridge. IS they pulled
him out of the water, battered, drench-
ed, and badly scared, he gasped ont a
protest against the thunderstorm in
these words: "Wall, if I'd a under
taken to light a gentleman home, I'd
done the Job better"
About this same Captain another
story is told which does not indicate
that he was as valiant rs he was humor-
Gus. He had enlisted in the Confederate
army. and his regiment was drawn up
in battle array before the advancing
hosts of the Union army. The Colonel
of the regiment thought it was tine to
make speech, and proceeded to at
tempt to fire the hearts OF the rank and
file by addressing them something after
this manner: "Fellow-soldiers of the
Confederate army, the enemy are be-
fore you. The sacred homes of Vir-
ginia and the graves of your ancestors
are behind you. Around your hearth
stones the women and children of
Virginia are praying you to be stead
fast and repel the invaders. The de-
mon horde of Northern mudsills are
bearing down upon Virginia. Unless
checked by your devoted and chival
rous efforts they will ravage your plan
tations, rob your granaries, burn your
barns, and pilage your houses" When
the Colonel had reached this point In
his address the brave Capt. Mosier
called out, as he suited his action to the
words and started on a run to the rear
IF all these things are threatening my
plantation, i am going right home to
see about II. And he went.-NelU
York Tribune.