Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1888-05-09
Picking UP Pointers.

clothes, English whiskers, the English
cut from top to toe, and the way he
did fling his chs" was awful to hear.
."Hi 'eard about this place from ha
friend on the hother side," he said by
way of explanation, hand | thawt has
'ow would drop down hand ave a
look around"
"Ah glad to see you," replied the
Colonel. "You are Frenchman, l
take it?
"Ha Frenchman Lord bless you
sir, but 'owever can you say that"
From your speech"
my speech Why, l was born and
raised in Hengland, sir, hand was
never hout of that glorious country
in my life before !"
80? Then ] beg your pardon. l
certainly took you for Frenchman.
Sit down, Judge, and make yourself
comfortable"
"Thankee, sir. Hill sit, but him
no Judge"
mo judgel Indeed you look like
one. Did you say you were from
England ?"
From Hengland direct, SIR"
England! England Let's see !
You must excuse me, General, but
| have had a great deal to think of
for the last year or two and my men,
ory is not SO bright as it might be.
This England-your country-is part
of-of Asia, l believe p
what! You don't know where
Hengland is ?"
81 know, of course. but it has slip
ped my mind. Oh, yes-it's in Glib
ralter. It's quite clear to me now."
Good Lord, man, you are still off |!
Hengland Why, sir, it astonishes
me %
"Ob, well, let it go. I'll consult
the map some day, and if England is
laid down I'll find it and try and re-
member the location. How are the
Arabs behaving now 7"
"Harabs? What have the Harabs
to do with Hengland? ?"
Haven't you got Arabs over there?
| thought had read of another up
rising, in which Liverpool was taken
and London besieged."
"The Harabs An uprising Good
Lord, man, but you astonish me !
There are no Harabs in England, un-
less it be in a Museum ~
aren't there Well, I've proba-
bly, got it mixed again. Did you get
your title in Spain, General I"
"In Spain! What would Heng-
lish general be doing in Spain! Hand
I'm not a general, neither"
BEG pardon. You have a militia
ry air about you, and I thought you
were a general. l see you have been
having terrible floods and earthquakes
over there"
"Hin Henglaud ?"
yes"
That's news to me, hand l left
'ome honly a fortnight ago."
81 thought it was England, but it
may have been some other country.
| know when they talked Of starting
subscription paper l offered to chip
in So worth. Say, it might have
been China"
"Hof course it was China You
hare hall wrong in your geography,
sir. May hask your profession ?"
"Oh, certainly. I'm United
States Senator"
(Which his the same has ha peer in
my country"
About the same"
Hand you don't know about Eng
land ?"
"Why, I've heard the name of the
country spoken of, l presume, but.I
didn't give it any particular attention.
Are the Alps in England ?"
"The Halps in Hengland Z? Bless
my soul, but you must ave great
deal hon your mind %
"Yes, as told you. am not sure
i was thinking-yes, | must be cor
rect-that Don Pedro is your ruler.
What sort of an old boy is he ?"
Don Pedro ruler of Hengland ?"
cried the stranger as he rose from his
chair In ast0nshment.
Cant be the Emperor of Russia,
you know" said the Colonel as he
picked away at his teeth, "because he
is Emperor of Russia alone"
"Tbe Hemperor of Russia! Great
'eavens, but what sort hof people ave
you hover ere ?"
Pretty good sort. Come sit down
and give us few pointers. Do the
Indians bother you much ?"
"The Hindians ?"
"Oh, don't go off half-cocked, Is
il in England that the savages scalp
ed so many pioneers ?"
The Epglshman looked from one
to the other of us in bewiIdered way