davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

Young Bloke-Hello, Soak! For
heavens sake. what's the matter?
You're total wreck.
Old Soak-Yes; we had FIRE at our
house this morning.
Young Bloke-Aluch damage?
Old Soak-Yes, considerable. You
see, the firemen came in at the window
was asleep, and they began by play
ing the hose on my breath. l haven't
swallowed so much water in twenty
years. Ugh!
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

Dude-Aw, say, Mr.. Soak. do yaw
kIiaw thaWt NAV tiancee. Miss Fox,
sleeps with haw pet cawt and ca
naWry?
Old Soak-Eh? Well, as she's going
to marry an ass, she'll have quite me-
nagerie.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

Ifhe's no good we'll shoot him. (They
enter the sanetuary.)
Preacher Now, listen to me, you
blear-eyed galoots. IT any Of you draws.
pop gun, I've had this church mined,
and the first moment I'll blow all your
rotten souls to hell!-remember. The
text chosen for to-day is ''Beelessed be
the peacemakers.
breaches four hours,
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25
Abreast OF Fashion.

Mr.. Hayseede (reading his Sunday
paper)-Why do these 'ere society
women wear so little clothes?
Pert Daughter-Perhaps pop, tits be-
cause they are in the swim.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

IT WOULD be mean to charge Mrs.
CLEVELAND with impairing the CONT
nuity of one-term views about the
White house. Even bachelors have
been willing to make it eight years.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

THE example Of President CLEvE-
LAND in choosing an experienced jour
nalist for his private secretary is not
the only one that his. successor will do
well to follow.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25
Probably.

Maid wish l knew how to live for
ever.
Mistress-Why?
Maid-Tve told so many lies for you
that I'm AFRAID to die.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

RECENTLY the thermometer at the
home OF Mr.. BLAINE touched below
zero. A fall in temperature there has
been known before after presidential
election.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

THE New South statesman, HENRY
w. GRADY, probably was more sue
cessful than he wished to be in his two
column effort to convince the legis-
lature of Georgia that he was not an
aspirant for the United States senate.
If it was, as suspected, strategy to Sc
cure the prize, it was too intricate for
the apprehension of the Solons, as they
elected CoLQUIrT the next day.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25
He Had Had Parties HimseIr

Uncle Pete-Manda, is yo' got dem
chickens shet up in the smoke house,
like tole yer?
Ant Manda-No; an I'd like ter
know what's de marter wifi yo', dat YOU
SO ticker bout dem chickens all
'twonce?
Uncle Pete-Nebber YOU mind; 1
know what's the marter, am dat's huff
till dem chickens is housed. When |
hear dem niggas ober dar in de next
yard is gwine to hab a party ta-morra
night, wants to be sure my chickens
doesn't tend it.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

IF 5000 are wanted to meet any de-
ficiencies in the receipts for the in
augural expenses, pass the hat among
those who won bets on the election.
Democrats are not flush Just now.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

MORTON is the richest man ever
elected vice president, and yet there
are st. Paul parties who remember him
as draper and tailor in country vii
iarp
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

MOST of the city pulpits are tackling
Robert Elsmere. 1t is not supposed
that they are in collision with the pub
fishers,
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

The Republican elected to congress
from Louisiana favors "the highest
kind of protection for sugar and rice"
He will not be in line with his party on
that question.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

PRESIDENT CLEVELAND will fill out
the first century of constitutional and
splendid history, and his successor will
be fortunate if he makes the first pages
of the second hundred years equally
cfedltable to himself and the country.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

EXPECTANTs will take note that Gen.
HARRISON is irregular smoker, but only
uses small cigars of clear Havana.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

THE trouble as diagnosed by the Dem
ocratic doctors was that there was not
time enough for the voters to under
stand the tariff. 1t is hoped they will
keep on reading up the subject till 1892.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

AN EARLY resident of st. Paul re-
members November that will compare
fayorably with that of this year. also a
spring equally commendable-lik those
he knew in Jersey. That state has not
been given full credit, evidently.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

KANSAS was the only state that chose
colored elector. His name is JOHN l..
WALLER.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

JEHU BAKER was beaten for con-
gress only 16 votes. and of course he
will contest, if the house is Republican.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

THERE is no DANIEL WEBSTER to
head HARRISON cabinet, but there are
FORAKER and ELKINS.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

BosToN and Chicago have been con-
graduating each other over the long
distance telephone upon the delightful
weather. 1t is pretty well spread out,
bnt the upper Mississippi is admitted to
have the choicest samples.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

ALL the more populous territories
will follow the example of North Da-
kota in preparing petitions to congress
for immediate admission. The dool
should be opened to all that have oil in
their lamps.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

If THE coal barons do not like the
weather of late, the consumers do.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25
Sincerely sympathetic.

Boggles (who has been waiting sixty
years for the demise of rich maiden
aunfl-That good old woman has gone
the way of all flesh. ALI Snaggles, say
something to comfort me.
Snaggles (who has waited almost as
long for the same melancholy EVENT.
Are you sure she's dead?
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25
Way Ont West.

Cowboys Outside the tabernacle
Let's go in and hear the new dominic.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25
NIPPED DIN THE ICE.

Canadian Craft Imprisoned in
Lake ST. Peter.
QUEBEC, Nov. 24.-The schooner
Audet and Robitaile was cut through
by the ice On Lake st. Peter. She
filled and capsized. Three other schoon-
ers have been lowed into Three Rivers,
as the captains refused to come on here
from Montreal. The ice is three inches
thick on the lake. The steamer Pomer-
anian is net likely to get away from
Sorei this winter.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

INVESTIGATION is being made at st.
Louis of the anomaly of low-prieed cat
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25
Not in This Line.

Madame Acidulous-Still brooding?
Monsieur A. the father of ten chill.
dren)-No, my dear, leave that to you.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25
THE DIVORCE RECORD.

The divorce statistics Of the United
States are being complied by commits
sion, and it is alleged that they show a
constant increase in proportion to the
marriages. In some states there are
from nine to five per cent of the mar
riages that eyentuate in divorce. This is
stated as being five times greater than
in the leading European countries. The
facilities for divorce in some of the
states are to a considerab lie extent re-
sponsible for their number, but there is
fruitful field for investigation and re-
form in this matter.
The official vote of New York gives
HARRISON 14,321 more than CLEvE-
LAND, and HILL, for governor, Is. 100 in
excess of MILLER. The Chicago Globe
and some other Democratic papers in
slst that this is conclusive of bad faith
on the part of friends of the Democratic
candidate for governor. That is hasty
view, and not necessary to an eXplana-
ton of the discrepancy. There were
local questions that affected many votes
on thu state ticket. Republicans chose
to vote for HILL, but that does not indi-
cate trading on the part of Democrats.
Still, the result is unfortunate for Gov.
HILL.
HAD ABRAHAM LINCOLN lived to
this day, will any one claim that he
would have revised the statement that
''as result of the war, corporations
have been enthroned. and the money
power will endeavor to prolong its
reign by working upon the prejudice of
the people. until all wealth is aggre-
gated in few hands and the republic
is destroyed?'
DANA, of the Sun, gives it out in
Paris that the election has definitely
settled the tariff question in favor Of the
Republican theories. He reflects his
personal wishes, and not the true situa-
ton. The goddess of reform may have
discolored eye, but time will heal the
defect.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25
WIT AND HUMOR.
Still on the Beat.

Hotel Proprietor Gocosely}-How is
your pulse this morning?
Bogus Baron (who intends to skip his
board biID-Stilf on the beat-stfll on
the beat.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25
Things Are Not What They Seem.

On the wedding morn.
Hail, wedding day suspicious morn
That gives me pledge divine;
I'll press my true love to my heart,
And proudly say, 'sShe's mine,,'
4 Is d
One year later.
There's nothing like experience
To show one where he errs;
But words are useless. You can guess;
That girl, egad-fm hers!
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

Miss Sentimental-There is no poetry
in this age-this prosaic nineteenth CEN
fury.
Editor-Heavens! Just look at my
WaSte-paper basket.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25
DAILY AND SUNDAY.

DAILY AND SUNDAY.
1y1 in advanceS10 90 3 mos. i'll adv. 50 80
Gin in advance ) 90 weeks in adv. W
One month .....S3c-
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

Mrs. Smith-You don't say so! What
Mrs. MaGinnis Over-eXertion. I
heard John say this morning he ran
ahead of his ticket. and got plurality.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

TRr WEEKLr-Oaily = Monday, Wednesday
and Friday.)
1y1 in advance 81 GO mos. in adv 81 %
3months, in advance. 81 0o.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

SUNDAY ALONE.
1yrf In advance. So 90 5 mos in adv. ....5oc
6 m. in advance l 90 l mo. in adv. .2oc
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25
BIZ LEWIS BAKER.

ST. PAUL GLOBE SUBSCRIPTION RATES.
DAILY Nor INCLUDING sunday
l VT in advance. SIS 90 3 IN. in adyance$2 10
6 m. in advance 90 q weeks i'll adv. 90
One month. ...T0c.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25
| Mrs. MaGinnis-Our candidates down,

Mrs. MaGinnis-Heard the news? Z
Mrs. Smith-Sakes alive, no! What
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25
A Scheme
fsg
That Didn't
Work.

by which he intended to realize quite a
fortune. He first spent some time in
learning to initiate the dulcet warblings
tof the nocturnal feline. This being ac-
scomplished, it was his plan to howl I'M
der various windows until his unhappy
audience would rise from their righteous
slumbers and hurl shoes. hair brushes.
water pitchers and other articles of
value at him. He says he had made ar
rangements with Seventh street pawn
broker to dispose of the articles thus do
mated. He further states that last We'd
nesday night he began to howl under a
Summit avenue window according to his
plan. He made night hideous for two
hours, and, Just as he was beginning to
despair the window was raised. dark
form appeared, voice yelled. ssScat!"
and deadly shotgun discharged its
nine-pound load into his dexter leg.
The young mans reputation for veracity
is. of course, not to be doubted.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25


This letter was dated OH Thanksgiving
day, and in it the writer said:
"Tell all of the boys that this is the
best country IN the world to make a
man wish that he was married. 1t is
Thanksgiving, but when | look at my
empty pocketbook, and know that work
is scarce and the cold very bad, don't
feel thankful at all. Winter is setting
in. and they say it will be May before it
is ended, and that we are lucky if we
get our mail once month from now
on. You are all enjoying turkey to-day,
am sure. and lots of other good things
we're my dnne r and S will have have to o do foS
supper. also. would come home, but
for lack of many things cannot. This
may be the last letter from me until
spring, so will wish you now a merry
Christmas and happy New Year"
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

Rejected communications cannot be pre-
served. Address all letters and kilograms to
THE GLOBE. st. Paul, MINI.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

sa%gss
One of the best books
of the year is William
Henry Hurlbert's Ire
land Under Coercion.
1t must, with time,
prove to be an honest
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

WEEKLY ST. PAUL GLOBE.
One Year 81 Six No. Csc Three Mo. 35c
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

where you drop a nickel to secure the
use of the institution, there were found
about a hundred cent pieces. 1t is gen.
orally known that the device is pro-
vided to operate with the inspiration of
the nickel alone, and that other COINS
slip through d do nogood. OF course
all these 1-cent-droppers expected to
defraud the machine out of the other
cents, and dead loss was realized, to
the gain of the owner of the machine.
The moral might be elaborated at
IaDpfh
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

So1sS
Among the pleasant
little fictionS attached
to Ton LOWRY'S tray-
els abroad is one, that
while in Paris and
stopping at the Hotel
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-11-25

has received only four presentations in
this country, is by Victor MaSse, and
has story of peculiar interest. Leo
nora Salviata, young Italian noble.
woman, has been stolen during her
childhood by band of wandering Gyp-
sizes, and brought up under their chief
as Queen Topaz. She livesythe nomadie
life of the tribe, and has scarcely
reached wOmanhOod when she meets
and loves Capt. RafeI, an officer in the
Italian army, who has been captured by
her tribe and whom she saves from
their vengeance. Previous to this meet
ing Rafel has already won Countess
Philomele's affections after desperate
Irritation; and this enyiouS woman, sec
ing his affection for Topaz, induces him
to believe, by means of conspiracy be-
tween herself and Annabal BarbianO,
that Topaz is false. Complications fol-
low. One night in Barbiano's palace
feast is given. The band of Gypsies,
disguised as noblemen, introduce Topaz
to the festivities, and she. during the
evening, succeeds in drugging Barbi-
ano, and then makes him the hero of
mock marriage with herself. Rafel be-
lleves this mock marriage real. and is
very much troubled over it. Here again
complications follow, which end by
IOTeSlduoNiuS tiit marriage OF Topaz
and Rafel. as we'll as the Countess Phil
omele and her fellow-conspirator, Bar
bianO.
sss@@s
Bogardus. the champion rifle shot of
the world, and his sons, four stalwart
young fellows, who now share their
fathers laurels, will be at the dime mu-
scum this week. Begardus visited st.
Paul years ago, when he first won his
spurs as marksman and gained the
name and the fame that he has ever
since held, of the greatest rifle shot of
the world. His four sons are chips off
the old block, and marksmen every
inch OF them. a most extraordinary
man is Panneck, famous as the balloon
man, because he is able to initiate his
chest until he is more balloon than man.
Morning journal and courier., 1888-10-02
PHYSICAL BEAUTY.
Plain Faces Tradsfermed Into Hand-
 some Ones.

Plain Faces Tradsfermed Into Hand some Ones.
 There are some men to be met with who frankly admit that their wives are ugly, and, says the London Standard, even here and there wife who agrees that her husbands judgment is correct. But as 8 rule every man considers his own choice the best, and where there are fifty minds there will be fifty ideas of what constitutes physical beauty. We all know and admit that personal charm and mental accomplishments can transform 8 plain face into 8 handsome one, and the lack of them deprive 8 woman with the countenancs of Greek statue of the beauty which at first sight struck the eye. It is no- torious that the women over whom men 'splay the fool" are often far from pretty. Not infrequently the belle of an Indian sta- ton is the ugliest girl within fifty miles, and the women round whom half the men on board ship on a long voyage hutter is very often by no means the beauty of the quarter deck. Nina D Enelos, who had lovers after she was seventy, does not seem to have been a great beauty. Nor. if we are to judge from some of the portraits of Mary of Scot- land, was that siren, with whom, as Lord Beaeons6eld used to say, men fall in love till this day, by any means strikingly beautiful. The "dangerous womenn of history have seldom been beauties. Nature Is full of compensations. The reigning belle is too of ten silly, or overestimating the fascination of her face, does not take the trouble to be ami able. On the other hand the plain woman, knowing that she is handicapped at ths start, doss heE best te eempensste ter her Al-tss
Morning journal and courier., 1888-10-02
THE HABITAION OF CRUELTY. How Infantieide is OmeiaIly Promoted
 In RGkiMg.

From the Chinese Times.l
 In series of papers on infanticide in China, read at a meeting of the North China branch of the Royal Asiatic society, Dr. Edkins and Mr. Balfour both allude to bal lock cart which psrambulates the city of Peking collecting the eorpsss of infants for burial. It is extremely difficult to obtain accurate information upon any subject in China, and the particulars given concerning the details of this charity vary with each in- formant, but the following may be taken as a fairly correct account of the matter: Ex- cept in the more respectable families with some money to spare, it Is considered use less extravaganza to bury with any formali- ties c child under ten years of age, and going lower in the scale we nnd that the infants of tee poor are often simply thrown out in- to the field or canals. where they arc at the mercy of the dogs, instead of being proper ly inferred. To meet this distressing state of things, at any rate inside Peking, there are two carts in connection with the Imperial Foundling hospital which make daily rounds to collect the little corpes for the burial in ground set aside for that purpose. Each cart has its district, one for the East city and one for the West which 1t visits daily. The carts are each drawn by bullock and driv- en by an old man-the object being that they
 
 always take the right of way as being imper- ial squipages, and every one, even high off eials, must yield the road to them-which most people are only too glad to do, especial ly in hot weather. They are the ordinary travelling carts with the cover, which in their case is black. Outside each gate are estab lished mol gues, generally in connection with a temple where the bodies are brought by women to await the cart, which carries it's pitiful freight to cemeteries out-side the southeast corners of the oity. These burial grounds are either Imperial property or the gift of the charitable. The person bringing . corpse to the Niu cs'te Fang pays 400 cash. The bodies are sewn up neatly in mating, or very occasionally enclosed in a rude -cof fin. They are not buried separately, but in conmon grave. It occasionally happens that a cry reveals the the fact that little one is not dead, in which case it is taken to the foundIing hospital, where it's life hangs on a thread, unless it is speedily adopted. The most significant fact in connection with the institution is that no'examination is made of the bodies, 8 startling proof that whether infanticide does exist to any great extent, the government does not regard it as mat ter of the slightest consequence. As for the the quantities buried no statistics are obtain able, but the cart has been seen erammed full of these abortive attempts at increased ing the population, even the rest at the back being piled high with the little packages.
Morning journal and courier., 1888-10-02
Marriage Licanses.

Yesterday was noticably big day for marriage licenses. They were made out to the following parties: John Foley and Mary Creamer; George I. Hardy and Clara E Stockholm; William Rice of Detroit, a plumber, twenty six years of age, and Mar garet Montgomery, of West Haven, of the same age; William H. Rosebrook, master of coal barge, to Laura E. Greenlaw, of Ban- gor, Me-; the captain is 52 and the prospec- tive bride is 24; James McGuire and Gather inc Nearry; Edward M. Foley, clerk at F. M. Brown & Co.'s, to Catherine T. McKen- zie. The average number per day during September has been three.
Morning journal and courier., 1888-10-02
A FoRGER CAUGHT.

After DefraudInR Several New Haven
 CTS, He is Finally Caught In PhtIa.
 delphIa.
 Through the efforts of Chief Bol1man forger who operated well in New Haven is safe in the clutches of the law at Philadel-
 phia, but it is doubtful if he can be brought
 to New Haven for some time as he has good
 deal to answer for in the State of Pennsylva- mia.
 On September 2 stranger entered Engel
 & Goodman's pawn shop on State street and
 after buying pair of opera glasses wanted
 MT. Engel to exchange his (Engel's) check for $100. He did so.
 The stranger then visited Joseph Goebel, the shoemaker on Church street. Here the
 same trick was played and MT. Goebel gave his check for bill. The stranger had pal. They then took the two cheeks and forged two others, one with Engel & Goedman's name to it for $175 and the other with Goe- bells name to the amount of $109. Both these checks were cashed at the Yale National bank.
 Chief Bollman at once sent out to all de- tective agencies description of the men. A peculiar thing about the affair was that the men called the next day on both the firms and said they would not use the cheeks, and I the money on the checks was given back. They were expert forgers and their signatures } of the names of ERgel & Goodman and Goe- | bel could not be told from the originals.
Morning journal and courier., 1888-10-02

vorsdness by attractiveness of manner, and in the end generally wins in the race. John Wilkes, who was the ugliest man of his day, was in the habit of boasting that he would give the handsomest man in England half an hours start of him and oust him early in the running. There is in truth no accounting for taste. Dr. Johnson always spoke of the painted and affected widow, old enough to be his mother, whom he married in the hey day of his youth, as ''a pretty creature,' and even Joe Gargery, in one of the most de- lightful of Dickens novels, was willing to believe that Pip's masculine sister was "a fine figure of & woman"