The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1888-08-02
AT A WEDDING.
The Real Inwardnoss of a Swell English
Wedding.

quests arriving and exchanging airy recog-
nitions as they settle down in their places.
bridesmaids, in various states of self con
sciousncss, collected at tho door. Loud and
sustained buzz of feminine whispering.
Policeman ION guard at another door, to
ppople with mania for seeing complete
strargrrs married.: VERY sorry, ladies.
Int if you arc not provided with tickets
cant let YOU in.
The people with a mania etc.: But
this is q public place isn't it?'
Policeman Glot foeling competent to
srI,ue the point: Those are my orders"
TTBo people, ETC., depart disconsolate.l
VergeI to guests with pink tckets);
"Auy Of these seats there"
Pink" guests attempting to pass
crimson rope which bars the central pas
sage): 1--WE want to be near the altar
we can't SEE here
Vergor lin a superior manner; "The
higher seats are SET apart for parties with
white tickets"
Pink" guests to enc another, indig-
nautlv): "And after we'd sent that girl a
salad bowl, too!'
CThey employ themselves in picking out
"whi1c" guests who ought properly to have
been 'pitlk,n remark that il is the most
shamofuIly managed wedding they ever
saw, and recur bitterly at intervals to the
salad bowl ..
Mrs. Ripplebrook who always comes
early ito see the people'1-O, there'u be a
Tremendous crush. OF course-they know
everybody Look, tho De Lacy Vespes
have just come iu-what a pity it is that
eldest girl has such a red nose; she'd be
ouito goodlookiug without it! y x
There's Narcissns Runderceod, you see him
everywhere Bows and smiles at him
effusively.) Horrid creature! And how
fat he's getting! Do you know who that is :
That's Miss Mabel Maycup of the PRO
sceulum,n you knOw-looks ever so much
older by daylight, doesn't shel | suppose
she's not one of the brides friendsi BY the
way. have you ever met him-thiS Pilber-
gilt man--tho bridegroom, | meanl o, my
dear, perfect horrorl Ten years older
tnan she is, and one hears such stories about
HIM In fact, it was only his money that
but her people were delighted, of course.
Ali, she's coming now; look how the brides
maids are all ''proening' themselves. That's
the bridegroom doesn't he look yellow!
Best man I'm whisper to bridegroom:
''Pull yourself together, old chappie. you
are looking SO chippy!"
Bridegroom: II feel chippy, too. Fact
is, those farewell suppers are mistake;
Ill never give another"
Mrs Ripplebrook: Now the choir are
going down to meet them. Don't you wish
they'd invent "a new hymn for weddings
I'm so tired of that Eden one. Thare she
is | always think this is solemn moment,
don't youl Can you see whether it's silk or
suede gloves the bridesmaids are wearinga
That's her father whose arm she is on.
They say he disapproved, but he doesn't
count Her mothers behind, with the
hook nose; why on earth she should cry |
don't know-it's all her doing. She makes
pale bride, doesn't shea But white Ouch
esse satin would be trying even to beauty.
! hear she threw over poor young Oldglove
most shamefully. Why does that tiresome
old bishop humble 500 | can't hear a
word
Housemaid belonging to brides family
Ito nurse: 81 wonder at that Louisa Jane
taking on herself to cry, when she only
came Toosday fortnight Now you and
me have got some claim to cry"
The nurse Qoftily): Them kitchen maids
can't be expected to know their place or
what's required of them."
In THE vESTRY.
General congratulations, compliments,
kisses, and signatures.
Bridegroom Ito best nam: 81 say, dear
boy, | look to you to square all these
Johnnies, you know. (which is the irrever-
ent mode designating the bishop and his
assistant clergymen.l
IN CHURCH DURING THE INTERVAL.
Mrs. Ripplebrook: Every daring of
them to be married in May, isn't it?
knew a girl who was married in May once
and the very first time they gave a din
ner party, her cook came up drunk soon
after the salmon, and gave her warning be-
fore everybody! Dreadful, wasn't it!
suppose you'll go on to the house and see
the presentsl Do-rm going o, you've
seen mines 1t is handsome, isn't it! l was
,ofD RI hars p11ita m ord IDo Or1a at
the stores-but that was when | thought
she was only going to be Mrs. Oldglove.
All, there's the Wedding March" at last {;
here they Gomez
bride and bridegroom pass slowly down
the central passage, recognizing their
friends at hazard. Several are left I'M
noticed with their deliberately prepared
smile wasting their sweetness on the brides
brothers. A young man rather negligently
dressed, who has been standing behind Mr..
Rpplebrook the whole time, forces his way
10 the 'front.'
The Y NJ Ito himself: "She shall see
me--if she has the courage to meet my eye
after her conduct"
The bride: "What, Mr.. Oldglovea I'd
no idea you were in town! We shall see
you presently, hope"
[She passes on, leaving the Y. M. to
think of all the scathing replies he might
have made
An old maid weeping in the gallery; she
has got in as ''the bridegroom's aunt"
character in which she attends every we'd
ding: Poor young thingsl-to think of
all the troubles before themp
Bridegroom's friends: Pretty wedding,
wasn't it9n
Brides friends: mot pretty wedding,
was it!'
IN THE CARRIAGE.
Bridegroom Finding the silence embar
rassing): Hope they'll give us time
enough to change, and all that. Horrld
bore If we missed our train and had to
waitm
Bride: 80, if you are going to find
everything bore already"
Bridegroom: "Well, isn't itr,
Silence returns.
in THE DRAWING ROOM.
presents laid out; guests wandering
round, keeping a furtive lookout for their
own offerings and feeling deeply incensed
If they are not prominently displayed.
Others consult the congratulatory tele-
grams as though they were of European in
terest. A detective, noticeable by sump-
tuouts get-up and his uneasy bearing.
watches the jewelry. Short-sighted old
gentleman friend of the bride approaches
and, misled by detectives festal attire,
takes him for the bridegroom
The S. o. q. with emotion: This is
great responsibility you have undertaken
to-day, sir. l hope you will be-ah-
worthy of it,"
bet professionally sensitive): THANK
/. - A. a ,lar