The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-07-07
THE SKELETON IN TANK
 BACON'S CLOSET.
HY PATIENCE srAf1KroN.

6umest Teller l ever sec. Six feet two in his socks when he wore 'em, long silky beard, eye like hawk and ha'r curlin' to his shoulders under a son. brerer-"
 "I dunno what the strangers looks has to do with your subjec'," inter- posed the solemn man with 6 red goatee.
 "He will lead up to 1t in his dis course" said tho young man from Bos- ton, mildly.
 "He was, as said, harn'sum," con- tinued the judge, without noticing the interruption, ''and 1t was further re- marked by all that knowed him that he want never seen inside a billed shirt. Jist flannel mostly laced down with red cord"
 "We was talkin' of skel'tons In every mans closet," burst out the solemn man.
 "But the time K. B. Hayes was nominated" said the judge, loudly, "speechityin' was poplar in Denver. l took a lick at 1t myself. and as the tariff was fur off and the Chinese nigh to home, pitched into the Chinese AS doin' the workin' mans wife out of washin'. We made furoar more'p we thort, and one day comin' down Sixteenth street, where the Chinese lived in side alley, sec considerable of crowd. fell in with the chiet of perlice.
 "sLord r says he, let the b'ys have their fun; they ain't doin' nothin' but smashin' heathcns' winders an idols; that's advised by theology Chief was great on that. Pretty soon the fun got little livelier, the heathens a-rnnnil.' like ants. yellin'. and their truck am houses yin arter 'em. Some feller who was feelin' pretty happy was tying rope round yaller old Chinaman's neck, him a-scrcechin' like mad, though l never reely knowed whether the bys was in fun or not, when down the street comes Yank at gallop on a white broncho he owned Tank was dandy in a row, but the b'ys was off this time. 'Stid CT j'inin' in the fun, he whips out knife and cut the rope round the Chinec. Cit, you divil ? he yells, and fur a mint Tank, the broncho and the crowd was 30 mixed up in fight you couldn't tell which was which. The Chinee got away, though. This row started more, and crazy coot come a. runnin' down the street with lighted torch, and arter he passed l felt somethin' whiz by. It was Yank, yelling like a Comanche Indian, his broncho on the dead run. There was three thousand men In the street then, and a big tongue of flame lept out from the Chi nee's quarters, and then heered the old ingine comin', blam, blam. There was Tank agin like jack-in-the- box bobbin' up, a-drivin' the hose cart. He and a respectable minority, as we politicians say, hitched the hose onto the water pipe, and let drive on the crowd. Gosh, they scattered, and Tank was hit with 6 brick that laid him up for week. The b'ys was mad fur him turnin' cold water On their fun, and there wouldn't one of 'em say good word tor him in his law suit, tried the next week."
 "Speakin' O skeptons," hurriedly remarked the solemn man with the red goatee.
 "The trial was," said the judge, pleasantly, about mine. Tank and another feller claimed 1t. Jury was all fur Tank, but old Bill Bean, of Wisconsin, he was the goldarndest arguer in Colersder. Argue the nails outer coffin, pickets of fence. He took spite to Tank, for Tank didn't wear c Oiled shirt, and Tank knowed he was gone"
 "Juries disagree," suggested the young man from Boston.
 The judge affected not to hear. "There was 6 hoss race come off the day the case was given to the jury, and the rest argued with Bean to give the case to Yank 50 they could all go the race, but that set up Bean right away. He argued theere want no such thing as honest hos race, never was even in time of the Roman chariots. He went clean back to an- tiquitIes, fetched up to r. D. present time-and then begun on Yank fur the flannel shirt, argued that it was disrespectful to judge and jury, etcet- cry, and the jury give in wore out. Tank was beat, and the crowd sorter reacted and was sorry and give Tank . banquet up to his cabin. He was dead broke, said he was going to Montany. Bean was there, and him and Tank got . arguin'. I was umpire. Says Tank, sIs trial fair, jedge, whom the jury tampers with the plaintifr
 "Ifs ginerally the other way l says, cautious: juries Is worked
 "sWall,' Tank goes on and he was middliH full, T ain't goin' to mention no names, but billed shirt was sent to me the first day of the trial with . note to wear 1t to influence Bill Bean and let the crowd out in time for the