St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-10-28
EXTRAVAGANT MEN.
Simplicity No Characteristic
Of Adams Descendants
in Dress.
How Much It Costs to At
tire a Society
Swell.
What Is Sham and What Is
Real About
Him.
Operations TO Which He Re-
sorts to Correct His De-
foPmitieS.

on the subject or feminine eXtraVaSalice
in hats and gloves. that they have ever
lived in an atmosphere of antedliuYIan
simplicity; but ever since their father
Adam SO readily accepted Ewes prOpo-
sitiOn to adorn his person with tig leaves,
his long line OF male descendants nave
patronized gents furnishing houses.
[ have been making a tour Of these fur
nishing stores with the intention or
purchasing some suspenders, and
found that they contain all that 1t mas
entered into the heart Of man to con-
ceiYe. from a campaign hat to pants
button. How much money 1t does re-
Guire to dress these dear creatures for
business or pleasure! When your gen
tleman belonging TO the world of swell
dom is ready for his evening party, he
is no lob lot"
He must have a suit of silk under
clothes which will cover him 10 the eX-
tent Of $50. His 50 black silk stockings
must be held in place by a hose sup
DC,rter of silk elastic, with Suspender-
like clasps. and fastened around with
tight band. which will prevent a rush
of blood 10 the head. Channels skin
drawers and shirt must be drawn
over the undercl0thes to keep
him warm. Next comes his dress
shirt. little s. affair. and his
handsome silk suspenders with embroid-
cry or hand painting that some darlIng'S
fingers have put there: and then his
linens and his S120 dress suit. Put
handkerchief in his pocket and he is al
most dressed. He must have some tight
patent leather shoes that cost only SD,
and some gloves. Tie a mutfier about
his neek.Sl5 more, and set OF his Uranium
with a silk hat. He may put diamond
paste on his cuffs and shirt front, thick
or thin. to suit MS taste, and when he
has his Seal-Skin OYercOat. he Is ready
TO create a vacancy. No, not yet we
have forgotten his bib. His delicate
chest must be considered, so we apply
protection of quilted black satin, with a
/ spray OF fOrget-me-notS painted on 1t;
and now. he has really gone.
He is an expensive affair, this dressed
I'D man. Ii did not cost cent less than
/ $500 to get MIN up in this style. How
much cold cash he does represent when
/ YOU take into consideration ali the
/ cigars he'll smoke. the wine he'll drink
/ and the billiards ne will play; ana then
/ think OF the gigantic intellect under
meath the silk hat.
But he needs many things yet. lie
must have Japanese silk nlEht-ShlrUS,
/ or some Daiamas. More money must
/ be expended for house Jacket or
I Striped flannel lined with polka dots,
/ the Jacket reaching TO the WalSt-lIne.
! This. with an embroidered cap, viii
make a fine smoking outfit. Perhaps
he will want a sash instead or
n vest. for his drSSS-Sult. If he
/ is modest, he may have it of
/ black silk: but black, lavender or white
will be proper. With a sash, he needs
I A belt attached TO his pants to buckle
I around the waist in order to dispense
[ with suspeHders. If he is too large. he
must have eOrsets TO keep him within
proper bounds In New York there Is
an institution where they make a Spe-
rialty of male corSetS. and he viii have
! TO send there TO get them. A great many
men wear cOrSetS. If you are ever out
with 4 gentleman VINO negteetS to pick
I'D the handkerchief YOU have dropped
| do not Judge him harshly. The only
/ thing that keeps him from this gallantry
/ is the corset he has on. and he can't do
/ it. you KNOW.
The tailor-made girl has long been a
subject for discussion by the world. the
! press and the pulpit; but what of all the
/ tailor-made men in ChristendOn. or even
in ST. PauI2 In the tailor shops they
pad to order all the men who object TO
1 the makeup that Providence has as
! signed them. The crooked is made
/ straight. the narrow man is
widened. and the men who is
| is concave or convex IS extended
/ or fiattened. A whole suit of
! padding made of silk is put on over the
underclothes. and. all deficiencies being
remedied. the clothes are fitted. not to
| the man. but to the padding. In this
way the tailor turns ont a pattern man.
or a pattern sham. But one obstacle to
masculine beauty cannot be overcome
1 bg the tailor. ami that is bow legs. A
/ bow-iegged man cannot hide his calamity
] under skirts. He is an object OF
/ mingled pity and ScoTn TO friends and
/ paSserS-bV, and it is no wonder that he
! resorts TO such painful eXpedientS in
I order TO be rid of the defOTmity. He
/ goes to a surgeon and has the bones
sawed or broken. and then Strengthened
! out. The bones are then set IN the same
/ wav that broken limbs are set. the skin
| is seWed up. and the unfortunate man
/ must take to his couch and stay there
! for weeks. When he energies he
is timid but happier man.
| Nobody blames men for doing such
| things. They can't help it, because. as
! Solomon affirmed. they are simply a
! bundle of Yanities. and want to look as
| well as they can. That is what they are
! living for. 1t was vanity that made
them bOw-Iegged at first: attempting to
| stand alone when they should have sat
on the floor, and trying to walk instead
| of creeping. All they do is just to
crafty vanity. They were born so.
They eat ana drink. they sleep and get
I'D and dress in vain. They marry in
vain. and then they die and knock at
the door of Paradise. all in vain.
POLLY POLLOCK.