davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30
The Quick or the Dead.

IL is singular but certain fact that
fly when drowned can be brought
back TO life. The method is very SIM
pie, but requires particular and strict
attention. II our readers doubt we
would advise them to study the follow
ing recipe carefully and tre il:
When tho fly is dead take it from the
water and roll it in table salt until II is
entirely covered. Allow it to remain
thus for about three or four minutes.
Remove the salt by blowing it. Do
not attempt to rub or pick ii of or YOU
may sent the poor, harmless fly in0
eternity forever. When the salt is off
take the fly in the palm OF one hand
cover it with the other. and shake IL as
the boys do pennies when playing
heads and tails. Place the fly on tho
table and it will either walk or fly
away. or perhaps crawl up the wall to
tho ceiling and into the pretty parlor
Of the coaxing spider. unless it has
been informed by older acquaintance
that by so doing il is passing through
the valley OF the shadow OF d,ath. :
New lo"s Brs,ii'ig sss
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30

Business of Importance with small
man from Connecticut
IL gave the subject a good deal of
careful study and concluded that Con.
nectcut was pretty good place after
all. | couldn't see why l should have
ever thought my health was poor
there.
"The coroner dropped in and looked
me over. and heard him promis u
dozen different men to see that each
was on the inquest.
about this time my old friend
Webfoot came down the street drag
ging a long rope behind him, with
a hangman's moose on the end of it.
He looked in aud said | was the man
who refused to shake hands with him
or call him by his last name. He said
any man who was too proud to shake
hands with old Webfoot councilman
from the Second Ward. had got to
hang. Then he threw the rope over
the limb OF tree in front OF the door
so could look Off across the prairie
through the moose and enjoj the
scenery
THE sheriff was now announcing
meet in five minutes. | got CLEAN
of hope Just then, when / saw the city
marshal coming. wearing his star.
appealed TO him for protection, but he
looked me all over and then said he
reckoned it was best for the civil
authorit es to take their own course.
and he waved his hand SO rs to include
every cutlhroat in sight. The proprie-
tor of the hotel came in and presented
bill for 50. for occupying his house
two hours, and said better pay before
the exercises; and heard the county
Judge yelling that the time was up.
II then started out the back door
| for Connecticut. i found that NV
health was first-rate for running. When
left Connecticut, Thought needed a
change of Innate. but conclude that
still needed one more change. BY
leaning over and and taking long steps
and lots OF them, | managed to reach
a little ravine and hill while they were
! getting on their horses and riding
around the hotel. | lay among the
sage brush till night. when | walked
down the track to this place. The peo-
pie here say the boys were only having
Il little fun with me, but can say AS
/ enjoy the L humor. An'h how I shall
60 back 10 Connecticut on tho train
that is coming up there. There more
health in Connecticut than ] ever gave
it credit for. Good bye-don't camp
at Oelrichs unless you are prepared
for the style of pleasantries. Fred
CdrrU.h, az AeW YDr6 Iribu 'e.
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30
A Word About the Censor.

Gong out for little recreation, my
sonP Well. that's right. like TO see
you enjoy yourself. Twas just talking
with your Uncle George about boys.
Il don't know but one place for boys"
said your Uncle George. land that is
work. Put 'em to work and keep 'em
at it, for idleness is the parent OF all
vice. Don map out any particular
trade or calling. but just keep 'em at
WORK and it'll map out itself, Keep
'cm ut work. and II habit OF work will
grow on 'em. That the way l was
brought up" Thus wisely speaks your
old-fashioncd Uncle George. knew
him when / was bOv. He was a
young man then and the LATEST white
man. 1 think, in the state of America.
His clothes used to mildew before he had
moved about in them enough to wear
them out He could st longer on a
store box. his hat pulled ovor his eyes.
blink ny ut the sun. than any man
ever saw. He didn't waste his time
talking politics, becaus he was too
lazy TO talk much. He lived with your
grandmother. aud she used to say that
the sun stood still every time it saw
George 90 TO the wOodpile and pick
up the axe. IL he did any work at all
in his life it was long before your
grandmother knew him. for she often
said that your Uncle George was borne
that way and she couldn't whip 1t out
of him. Now. 1 have frequetly no.
ticed that men who talk that way-but
| am keeping YOU here and yau' II miss
the tram. just wanted to tell you
this, because your Uncle George has
gone to see tho baseball game and
know he will sec you there. and don
want you to feel discouraged when he
tells you how hard he had to work
when he was boy. Well yes; don't
mind il do go along with you. I'm
pretty fond OF labor. myself. and
don't know of any harder work than
trying 10 understand modern game
of baseball and the umpre's decisions
Come along. Dob Bu'dette.
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30
Why Trunks Do Not Last.

Think of the railroad employees that
now find thor labOrs doubled. "
have heard of trunk road. exclaimed
an old woman, as she gazed upon the
immense amount of luggage, "but here
are trunks b. the thousand. The
Pennsylvania Central sent out 1870
trains last Saturday. and this is only
one of the great avenues to the country.
Reader. think of the baggageman's suf-
fering at such time. Think too of
the immense size of the luggage he
handles. Madame, do you call this a
trunk! Why it only lacks chimney
to be a boarding house" No wonder
trunks get such hard usage. In old
times trunk was an heirloom, but now
they get knocked TO pieces in few
years. Well. who is to blame? Any
one who sees how baggagemen ara
imposed OH. will not be surprised ut
the rough way trunks are occasionally
treated 1t is estimated that 40. 900
trunks are handled daily at the various
depots. but at the outing season the
numbe is nearly doubled. All trunks
not called for are stored at a charge
of from % 10 so cents a day, and this
forms a handsome perquisite. If not
called for in week they are sent TO u
warehouse and at the end of year
are sold at auct on.-Ner0 York Cor.
Rochester Democrat
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30
A Malden's Pocket Money.

II have only an allowance of SIC a
week for pocket money" said the
daughter of millionaire in confiden-
tial moment the other day. Papa has
such an idea of money, you know, and
he thinks l am wildly extravagant to
spend that small amount on candies.
flowers, novels and theater tickets.
Mamma orders all my clothing. you
know, and, so, of course. l do not have
to buy anything that really need"
To many a Young girl $40 a week
would seem sufficient for pocket money.
aud indeed. how many hundreds of
pretty and clever girls are there who
cannot earn more than that amount
even by working hard each day of the
week? But the average fashionable
society girl has so many demands on
her purse that $40 does not go far.
1t is said that j. Gould very gener-
ously allows his pretty daughter S25,
and with this she not only supplies her
own littlo wants. but gives to most Of
her small charities.
Cornelius Vanderbilt and Elliott (.
Shepard allow each of their six children
certain amount of pocket money each
month, and they are required to keep
cash accounts and present them to their
papas the first of the month. The
amounts are not large. and are given
more to make the little millionaires un-
derstand the value of money than
aught else.
Willie X. Vandorbilt's three children
are allowed plenty of pocket money,
but are fined heavily for all misdemean-
ors. They dine in pretty little room
adjacent to the great dining room. and
il tiny drop of any coffee, milk or
wine is spilled on the snowy cloth the
offender Is fined % cents for each of
tense. A glass of water knocked over
or dish let fall on the floor brings a
fine of so cents to the culprit, and all
the fines go to the foreign and home
mission.
what do l do with my $50 O
weekP" said an only daughter Of q
Fifth Avenue millionaire. when asked
the question. "Well not always the
same thing. Last week l spent ever y
cent of il on lovely new parasol. "a
carry at the coaching parade. and then
after all my trouble it poured rain.
generally purchase my flowers-yor
know / must have fresh corsage clus
ter OF violets every day-and they
cost 81 cluster.
Then bonbons. soda, chocolate ant
those little trifles come to about 30
and couple of matinee tickets, tes
for my old women at the Home fer tn,
Aged, new music and papers. use NJ
tha rest am fearfully short some
times and draw in advance and ther
forget TO pay back. don't you know
Papa used to allow mo so much eacl
quarter for my wnrdrobc and mail
but was alwa in deep water Nov
1 order what | want and have the bill
sent to him.
' IL do not think that the wealthies
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30
Sam Slick Description of q HiYta.
tiOu.

"What flirts all you men are? said
she. "But. oh, my sakes! amt that
tree lovelyP-just one mass of flowers.
II old me up, please. Mr.. Slick. till l
get a branch of that apple trec' o.,
dear! how sweet it smells"
Well, took her in my arms and lift.
eel her up. but she was long time
a-choosin' of wreath. and that one
she put round my hat, an d then she
gathered some sprigs for nosegay.
Don't hold me so high. please.
ThNre. smell that-ain't it beaut full?
] hope l amt a.showin' of my an
kleS.
'Lucv. how my heart beatsw says /.
and it did, too; it Numbered ike u
sledge hammer-l actilly thought it
would have torn my waistcoat buttons
off Don't YOU hear it go bump,
bump. bump. Luc,? ] wonder if it
ever busts like bilcrP--for hollin
such Il gal as you be. Lucy. in one S
arms amt safe; it is as much rs
one s."
Don't be silly" said she, larfin'
cor I'll get down this mint. No, "
said she. 81 don't hear it beat
don't believe you've got any heart Il
al"
There" said l, brngin' her a lit
tie further forward don't you hear il
nowP-Iisten."
mo" said she, '.ts nothin' but your
watch tickin'. " and she larfed like
anythin'; IL thought So"
You havn't no heart at all, have
you?" said !.
ut never has been tried yet" sa q
she. Il hardly know whether | have
or not
'Oh! then You don't know whether
it Is in the right place or not"
Yes. it is. y said she. a pullin' of M
whiskers; yes. it is just in the RICH
place just where it ought to be" ant
she put my hand on it. ''Where else
would YOU have il, dear. but where j
itP But hush! sad she; 81 saw
Eunice Snare just now; she is a-comin
round the turn there. Set me dow
quick, please. Amt it provokn'p tina
gal fairly haunts.me. hope she didn'
see me in your arms"
iii lift her up to tho tree too,
says !. "if YOU like. and then"
"Oh, nor said she; ''it amt wort
while. don't care what she says o
thinks one snap of my finger -San
| Slick.
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30
Lived q BETTER Lie.

This strange story comes from Law
rem ceville:
A few days ago a Georgian died in
Hot Springs. Ark, died and was
buried there. He had been for some
years n trusted and honored citizen of
that place. He had married there. had
become rich, holding various positions
of honor and trust. and enjoyed the
confidence and esteem of all who knew
him. Yet that man was living in the
shadow OF crime-was an outlaw
from the state of his birth. 1t was
Charles Clinton Ambrose.
The mention of his name will recall
to the older citizens of Georgia and
especially Gwnnett county. the par
ticulars of II sensational tragedy
1t was in the winter of Oh Go that
Bill Orr. prosperous farmer near
Lawrenceville. was shot and killed by
Charles Ambrose Both STOOD high in
the community and the k Hing aroused
a strong feeling. The cause of the
killing was understood to be All insult
offered be Orr to Ambrose's sister. and
this. of course. tended to counter bal
ance the fact that the shooting was in
cold blood. Orr had been shot down
i'm the streets of Lawrenceville in
broad daylight. The weapon was II
gun heavil, loaded with buckshot
found subsequently just where it had
been fired and leaning against tree.
Ambrose, then Dung man OF 18 or
20, Immediately fed the state. The
sIn
Immediately after the shooting. to u
friend. and hurriedly explained to
him what had been done.
Il need money" "ahd / have not
time to 90 home after t. Will you
let me have money now and risk the
chancesp"
A minute later the Young man, al
ready mounted on fleet horse. was
handed cloth bag containing $1,000
in gold. With last backward glance
toward the old homestead the young
man dashed off, and from that day to
this he never saw Lawrencevllle again.
At least Everybody thought.
A reward was offered by the gov
ernor and this supplemented by re-
wards from other sources. Search
was made far and near. but no trace
was ever found. The story of the
shooting become II wartime tradition
and descended as such TO new gener-
alton.
Eighteen or twenty months after the
killing the father OF the boy left for
Louisville. Ky, carrying his wife with
him. on a business trip. Six months
later another trip was made. and four
months later another. Upon these
visits the father and mother saw their
son. And the son returned the visits;
ut least the story goes that he had
made frequent visits 20 his own home
visits of which none but his immedi-
ate family were aware.
But the visits have ended. A few
days ago Charles Clinton. wealthy
and highly respected citizen of Hot
| Springs, breathed his last. He died
surrounded by a loving family. This
was Charles Clinton Ambrose.
The Arkansas side of the story is
briefly told. A man of excellent adj
dress, young and energetic. came to
Hot Springs at the close of the war.
He developed into highly successful
life. died at the age of forty-two. leav-
ing his wife and children n snug for.
tune.
And this is tho story which comes
from Lawrenceville. -AtLaltG COnsti-
| I,lLIOu
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30
Gladstone and IngersUll.

The spectacle of so minded
a man as Mr.. Gladstone
standing helpless in the peltng rain of
Mr.. IngersolPs blasphemous epthets
was not pleasant. But 1t was not UNI
dignfied. Any small and malicious
boy can dsiigure a beautiful statue
with mud if the police are not looking.
Mr.. Ingersoll flung his mud and shot
off his rockets at the serene and ma
iestic argument of Mr.. Gladstone. An
irreverent public might laugh with Mr.
Ingersoll, but not at Mr.. Gladstone.
Mr. Ingersoll can not be argued W tn.
If he must be met at all he mus; he met
in fight. He presents the powers of
darkness apd anarchy. To start out
by saying amiable things to him is to
lie. And he knows that very well. He
does not attack with kid gloves what
in his ignorant and superficial mind
stands for Christianity. He takes q
blndgeon and goes for it. shrieking
with Joy whenever he fancies he makes
good stroke. OF oil the takers
against Mr.. lngersoll commend us to
Father Lambert. He has his bludgeon
and is not ashamed to answer foo
according to his folly or not, as occas
ion demands it Freeman JotrnG
(Cdth0tic.)
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30
Russell Sage's Munificence.

The citizens of Calais were presented
with the rare sight last week of New
York millionaire in the person of Rus
sell Sage, a gentleman reputed to be
worth between $40, 900. 900 and $50,
600. 600. He came to attend the sale OF
the Grand Southern Railway, which
was advertised to take place on
Wednesday last He bid it off for the
bondholders at SOL. 600. Mr.. Sage
stopped at the Border City Hotel dur
his sojourn here. During the time.
Stephen Gardiner, one of the landlord S
sons. put span of nice horses in n
handsome two-seated carriage and took
the old gentleman out for drive over
the city, so that he might see what a
nice, coy little corner of Uncle Sam s
dominion VIC occupied. He seemed
highly pleased with the appearances of
of things generally and the attention
paid him in particular. When they had
returned and he was safely landed on
the piazza of the hotel, TO show the
high appreciation of the courtesy he
drew forth his purse aud handed the
young man the muniticent sum of-1O
cents, which he took and put in his
pocket, not that he expected or de.
sired any recompense for what he had
done. He is going to have hole
punched in it and wear it on his watch
chain as memento. -CdydtS (He.
advertiser.
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30
Advice.

The birth of an affection is always
the birth of new life, and the begin.
ing of forever.
Growing isn't waiting for sunshine.
1t is real reaching after it.
1t is good to put bother away over
night. 1t all straightens out in the
morning.
There are two things for live men
and women to do. To receive from
God. and to give out to their fellows
Mrs. A. d. 7. Whitney
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30
POINTS OF HUMOR.


The rate that ship travels at Il
knot stated. - Ocean.
When the captain wants to stop the
vessel does he hoist stay-sailp-
Ocean.
The young man with n slender sal.
airy should choose for his wife girl OF
small waste.
1t is the counterfeiter who always
''pays man in his own coin. "-Yon.
kers Salesman.
The centonarian may not be must
clan. but 1t Is certain that he is beating
time -Dansvi Ls Breeze.
Time waits for no man because some
men are so long in coming TO time. we
suppose. - Yonsers Statesman.
Brown understand you have had
an addition to YOUR familyp JOnesA
Yes; and something to cnrry.-Puck.
The reason that birds clean out o,
fruit tree so quickly is that they take
tho fruit away peck at a time. - Bos-
ton Bulletin
Barber Ito customer): you are
about the baldest man / ever saw.
SIR" Yep; been married three
llIncS. -EOOCn.
FIRST Philadelphan: 'Mr Chlds'
time is very valuable" Second Phil
adelphian: Yes. indeed He has one
clock that cost 800. Life.
A colored minister prayed the other
day that the indicate might be deli
cate, the Incorporate temperate. and
the industrious dustrious. -Neuad9
Democrat
According to an advertisement in
Brockville paper relating to a town
contract condition is: "rhe contrac-
tor to expire on the 30th April, 1889. -
Toronto Globe.
Condemned murderer TO sheriff.:
81 say. sheriff, you have a strong pull:
can't you use it in my behalfp' Sheriff
(kindly): Certainly will-when the
proper time comes. "-Epoch.
Young wife: John, mother says
she wants to be cremated" Young
husband: Tell her if she'll get on
her things I'll take her down this
morning. "-Saa Francisco GIL
And are you the captains boyp"
asked the old lady on deck. Yes m, "
he replied bravely. swell. you don't
look like him at all" she sa d, land ]
never would have believed it,,
Ocean
Mister" no pleaded II have lost a
leg, and" Yes, so | see. It's
mighty provoking to lose anything. 1
lost dog once that | had often tried
to give away. but l was mad about it
just the same. "-Epoch.
Bobby: Il guess you must be a la
dy-killer. Mr. SISSY" Mr. S ssy (com.
pncently(: Jaw dye think so, Baw.
b,p' Bobby: you must be: Clara
sad that after you left last night she
nearly died laughing '-E och
"Do YOU believe there is any such
tn NC as luckP" asked young man of
an old bachelor. II do, I've had
proof of it," ..In what way?" II
was refused by five girls when | was q
young man. "-Merchnnt i1'aUeier.
why. bless your heart, Erasmus,
dis ere fotygraf amt like you, no
how. 1t makes yer look ten years older
dan you is. Oats all right. honey,
needn't get annudder TOKEN for de
mex ten y ars. Sce"-DetroH Free
Press.
An Allentown tailoring firm employs
a Dung woman to collect from the
swell customers who are inclined 10
shrk paying honest debts. This seems
to explode the old saying that "wom-
ans work is never dun. "-NorrlSlown
Herald
Omaha man: Think Mountain
country is going to be rich section
some day, eh? How is tho water-or
perhaps you didn't test it?" Colonel
Kaintuck: ooh, yes we did; chucked
4 hatful onto a fire and it worked first
rate. ~ Omaha World
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30
How She Saws 1t.

The Boston glrl-when Sol begins TO glow,
And days are iuconveniently warm
Who how you stand the weather wants to
know,
Puts not the question in its vulgar FORM
Adjusting in her fascinating way,
The gold rlmmed glasses that assist her
view,
She asks: 'Is there caloric sir. to dav
Sufficient in the atmosphere for yovP
-Bostou Courier.
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30

New Workers are moro THAI liberal in
allowing pocket money for their daug h
ters," said the principal of very fash
ionable uptown school. my pupils
are most of them daughters of million
ares, and yet they have seldom enough
for their many little wants. 1t is WIS.,
dom. not meanness, on the part OF the
parents, l think. "-New York Journal.
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30
A Very Dumb Girl.

Alphonzo: II am a poor man, Miss
DePink. but am industrious. honest,
and ambitious; and IL you--yor
would-oh Miss Depink. Alice" Miss
DePink: WIN certainly. / haven
much 10 give, but your welcome, Here's
10 cents. Omaha World.
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30

An important step in the progress of
the Nicaragua canal enterprise was ect-
ed few days ago when the government
Of Costa kica ratified the contract with
the canal company, giving it certain M
2Ortant and nece sary franchises and con
-essions- These are in tenor and form
similar to those granted by Nicaragua,
and wee essential to the progress and tie
security of the enterprise. There is now
nothing in the way of pushing forward
to completion this wholly American pro-
iect, the great commercial advantages o
which. when finished, are now acknowl-
edged 1t is designed that the cana
shall be fully ready for traffic within a
period Of five years.
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30

A woman in Belfast. Nc. who wen: cut
n the storm The tn day lad her -, 81
ustle struck by ghtu ng and sal II felt
q though some one la pourri hot wa -
I0wn her back. She Is new an en-.
hu-iastic c nvert To the anti us:le
1usadcL
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30

Yan Phuy Lee, of the class of 81, Yale.
has gone to Califo mia where he Is to enter
the bank of San franc SEQ Mr.. Lee en-
tered Yale with the class of 81, but when
the orjer came fro II the Chinese govern
ment recalling all Chinese students Mr..
Loe left college and returned to his home.
While student at Yale he became con
verted to Christianity and became a mem
Der of the c0llege church. He remained in
China about two years and then an away,
worked his passage to this country, an
again entered Yale in the class OF ~.
During his collegiate career he was assist
ed mewhat by friends, but for the most
part paid his expenses by giving lee ureS
on Chinese life and civilization.
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-08-30

Another shock awaits the American
wheat grower and miller. Another grain
phantom has materiaized. Another gran
airy of the world" is announced. This
time 1t is she valley of the Congo, in inte-
rior Africa. As usual the new 'granary
of the world is mo fertile than all tn
rest OF the earth, It's waterways are the
finest, its climate the most heavenly, and
it is alb g to turn cut at least 900, 600, COS, =
900, coo 600, 600, 600. 900 bushels of wheat
so OK client that, when Congo becomes
known, ordinary Dakota and Minnesota
wheat, now known as the best on earth,
will be relegated to the station e hog-feed
and ornamental grasses. Welcome The
"5ranary of the world" Adieu Chilli,
Argentine Repub l., Australia and India
All aboard for G ngo'