Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1888-05-05
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Daily eagle
BEING AGREEABLE.
FIRST RULE IN WRITING "A CODE
or GOOD MANNERS.

Give Your Whole Attention to Whoever
May Be Talking to You-A Useful Habit
to Form-An Unspoken Compliment.
Example.
Our little village has been full of strangers
lately, and friend and started off the other
day to make round of morning calls. At
our first stopping place, young lady, with
fair sweet face lighted by the brightest and
bonniest of blue eyes, was brought in TO see
us l was delighted when she took a seat
near me, and turned with considerable vigor
TO open the conversation. She met my ad-
vances languidly, looked down at the en-
broidered initial of her handkerchief, or
studied my card case, OF, worst of all, seemed
distracted by the group at the other end of
the room. My Indignation rose steadily, and
as soon as poiiteness allowed, made my bow
and said Good morning"
IN HIGH GOOD HUMoR.
Two or three more visits brought US to q
house where there was another strange girl.
The guest fell to my share again. Drawing
her chair toward me with friendly little
hitch, she seemed to forget that there was
any one else in the room, and gave me mot
my clothes her undivided attention as long
as we stayed. 1t was refreshing, and | went
off on my rounds again in high good humor.
She was not nearly so pretty as the other
girl, but soon found that | was not the only
one whose heart she had completely cap
tivated
Perhaps in writing code of good manners
this rule should be put first: Give your whole
attention to whoever may be talking to you.
l once heard a little child say of a famous
belle, "Oh, she's awful NIGEL She loves to
hear about my dollies." There it is. We
like the people who like US, who are inter
ested IN our pet project, or, at any rate, viii
listen to our rhapsodies over it-really listen.
L do not think a pretense of attention is
ever safe. 1t may be the merest common
place that is doled out to you; but fix your
mind on it, and besides saving your COM
panion the chagrin Of finding himself I'M
needed, you form most useful habit. Many
persons miss a large part of the sermons and
lectures they attend, simply because they are
unused to concentrate their thoughts When
a laugh runs round the audience at some sly
hit of the speaker, or burst Of applause
greets his fash of eloquence, these lstless
friends of ours are reused TO nudge their
neighbors and whisper, "What was that."
GIVING HONEST ATTENTION.
Then there is scarcely anybody lis there
single persona who, in his best vein, cannot
say something of interest; and there is no
surer way of bringing out his best than by
this unspoken compliment of honest atten-
ton. The most of us are probably not SO
overstocked with information as not to won
der little at that assertion which Carlyle
made after spending months in London: "Do
not find single creature that has commune
Gated an idea to me-" In lesser mortals we
could easily say whose fault that had been;
but we must not NEEDLE with the judgments
of the great Mr. Carlyle.
know young man, ugly, awkward, and
with absolutely none of the so called ''small
talk" A most unprornising subject for a
ladies' man, and yet this Is the opinion given
of him by a befrizzled, behounced bright
eyed young miss, who has half the boys of
the village running after her:
'Do you know Mr.. Mclean? Isn't he
lovelyl Tremendously learned, you know,
but not the least bit 'scary.' Actually lis
tened to every word poor little 1 said, and
seemed to expect me to talk sense. l felt
dreadfully funny talking about books and
that, but it was awfully entertaining. be-
gin to think have one or two IDEAS really"
ajum Sarjum" in Demorest's Monthly.