The Washington critic., 1888-02-04
pn1eHT noYs Avn aIRLs.
witty and Wise Things Said by the
Little Folks.
WHAT HAS JUDY poNE2"


in the carly morning in her sick mothers
room was put out in the hall, and soon
after n miserable old rag doll of which she
was very fond was tossed out to her.
This was the "straw" that did IL.
Snatching up her beloved and lugging
IT tightly in her arms. with streaming
eyes she sobhod out to her grandma;
III wouldn't tared, but what has Judy
donc2'-l Boston Globe.
JUVENILE SCHOOL FREAKS.
A teacher had n small class in easy
physiology, They had several lessons on
the ear, and had been thoroughly drilled
on the names and uses of all lbs parts so
that when some visitors dropped in the
teacher was glad IL happened to be the
hour for this class TO recite. After asking
several questions and receiving prompt
and correct answers she said
ear Y''
The child hesitated minute and then
spoke up loud and plain:
"The Erie Canal"
Another teacher asked one of her sohol-
ars the meaning of the word "yicissitude.i
Change" was the reply.
THAT'S right, said the teacher: "now
give me sentence with the word vicissi-
tude In Il.
"My mother sent me to the store to
yicissitude dollar bill.-tDetroit Free
Press.
LITTLE GEORGES PRAYER.
a story about the confusion of words
has brought to the Listener from "a. NJ.
r. this unpublished narrative, which
comes down from slavery times:
George was q negro boy owned by my
friend Judge W, in New Orleans. He
was devout fellow, and enjoyed his
evening prayer beside his gentle mistress,
where, believing in sound rather than
sense, he .innocently and emphatically al
ways said
Forgive us our precipices and lead
us not onter u plantation ~ Boston
| Transcript.
now SHE FELT
Edna had severe attack of the Group
one night, the first she had ever had.
Everybody was frightened, and Edna her
self did not know what to make of it.
"How do you feel now, pet?" asked
auntie, after the hot-water bath.
'1'm pretty well, l flank you,n
answered the little, girl; "but Oh. Aunt
Nell, my bref's orile snarly. ~ Youths
| Companion.
MASTER BoBBYs EYES.
Master Bobby has eyes considerably
larger than h is stomach. The other day
at table he was lingering piece of bread
he did not want to eat. "But you must
eat ii since you touched it," insisted his
father. "All right" replies Tommy
then If j put my finger in the cream
jug must drink 1t all upY'-[B Baby
hood.
ACoSuoAL ooNcErr.
Little Bessie-Papa, do hate. to hea
your pen scratch?
Papa-Its the paper, my dear.
Bessie--Well, papa, can't you get SOM
paper that doesn't itch so bad ?-[ Bur
lington Free Fress.
THE GOOD ANGEL.
| A little boy was sent TO the grocer's 70
pail of,molasses. Returning he fell an,
spilled it in the sand. AS he wspt pro
fusely oyer the appalling catastrophe,
little friend Glanced to come along an,
asked him what he was crying for. IL
replied:
II have split the 'lasses, and I am afrai
to go home and tell my mamma. Sh
will whip me" trf
Towhich his little would-be oomforte
answered, in solemn tones;
Haven't you got a grandm1T'-[B Bos
ton Globe. s
LOOKING HIGH FOR CRITICISM.
A little boy, after patient attempt +
make picture of horse on his slate
asked his mother:
"Do the angels see everything?'
"Yes," she replied.
"Well," said the youngster 'when the
see this horse bet they will laugh
Albany Express.
TWO THINGS THAT ARE ROUND.
One day when the teacher of a kinder
garten was giving the first lesson in geol
raphy she used q ball to illustrate th
shape of the earth. After q careful e1
planation she gave the ball to little boy
and said "Now, Johnny, can you tell m
what is round like ball?"' "Yes'm,
said John, delightedly, another one."-
Youths Companion.
NEW USE FOR WIG.
"Grandpa," said BERTHE, "you like +
see young boys enjoy themselves, don
you?" "Why, yes" replied grandpa
"And you like to do all you can to hel
'em have good time, don't your
"Why certainly" 81 thought so. We'll
we and the Tompkins boys and tb
Clarks are going to play Life on th
Plains in the Clarks' barn for the mex
two afternoons, and / thought I'd ask yo
to let us take your wig to use for scalp.
-[Tid-Bits.
WE DO WE Dow
The substitute teacher in the publ
schools is generally taken advantage G
by the pupils, no matter how much sh
may be esteemed. A good many children
have an idea that that is what substitut
teachers are for. Not long ago Sub il
one of the most troublesome of tn
schools, having most dreadful time wit
arefractory lot of pupils, lost her tempe
altogether, and exclaimed with great v,
hemence-"Do you think / am an idiot p
room: eve do! We do"-[Bos
Transcript.
DIFFERENT AUTHORITIES.
l Minister-So you go to school, do you
Bobby? i''
Bobby-Yes, sir.
Minister--Let me. hear you spell bread
Bobby-B-r-e-d.
Minister-Webster spells it with an a
Bobby. 'r
Bobby--Yes, sir; but you didn't ask m
how Webster spells it--you asked me hoy
spell it.-LN. Y. Sun.
Il AN EXCUSE FOR PAPA.
Harold getting old enough to astonisl
his parents occasionally with an origina
remark. The other evening his mothe
said something to his father, who wa
reading He didn't hear it. She repeate'
it, but the head Of the family was too in
tent on his reading to notice that he wa
being addressed. Harold had watche,
operations, and after his mother hal
spoken the second time, observed
Mamma, think you'll have TO 'sous
papa. guess his ears has gone out t
walk around the block for few min
utes. s."-[Chicago Tribune.