New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1888-12-05

up about midnight, / suppose. The
camp was all quiet, one guard was
asleep, another was on his beata few
yards off, and the other was stand
ing by the fire smoking his pipe.
AAh, yes, and you crept," began
Miss Clara.
No, { don't creep at all, 2 inter
rupted Bachelor Jim with a polite
ness that delighted his faction, II
walked up to the fellow by the fire
and asked him If he couldn't let me
have a pipe and some tobacco
Mercy! What did you want that
for?o asked the lieutenant who had
evidently expected far more heroic.
Well, / felt like I'd like to smoke. Z
And what did the rufian say?''
ooh, he was civil enough. He was
an lrishman, and he said aBegorra I
kin that same. Hyur's Jake ashlape
an the pipe a shtikin' out of his
pocket: Sure yez might ez well be
kapin it Warrum fer i'm.
"Oh,Mr. Starkweather!'' interrupt
ed Valeria, leading off in a clasping
of hands, ''how perfectly clever that
is. ! never had an idea you could
initiate the Irish dialect like that.
TO on what next
Well continued Bachelor Jim,
his eyes tWinkling Like diamonds,
che filled the pipe and handed it to
me, AN may it taste shWate to yez,"
says he, ssbelike it's last pipe Yell
liver shmoke."
Capital! capital" creid Miss Val
eria, land suppose when you found
him SO obliging you bribed him to
let you 60
''Why, no I didn't" said Bachelor,
Jim, what would / let him know [
had money for? That's just what I
was trying to hide from him.
ooh, forgot that, well?'
Il asked him to get me a coal of
fire to light my pipe
"Oh!" calculated Miss Valeria again
in a puzzled tone, while Miss Clara
threw her q sarcastic smile.
'sAnd when he stopped to get it, it .
continued Bachelor jim, 81 hit him
with my fist as hard I could drive,
just under the ear, and knocked him
over into the fire, and then ran off
as fast as could clip it. =
A chorus of "Ohs!" greeted this
denoument, as unexpected to the
audience as to the unfortunate Irish
men, and Miss Valeria added enthusi-
astically.
Dear! how perfectly clever that
was. | never should have thought
of such a thing
Il think it was real deceitful and
ungreatful," said Miss Clara. "The
idea Of knocking a man down in the
very act of doing you favor, and
into the fire too! 1t was barbarous!
inhumanp'
StBut you don't think that he would
have shot him if he hadn't knocked
him down." urged Miss Valeria.
ssNo, he wouldn't either, not if he'd
stayed in his place." retorted Miss
Clara.
And how was.he to get away if he
stayed in his place % demanded
Miss Valeria.
We'll, [ don't care" there must
have been some other way main
tanned Miss Clara. II don't think it
was honorable, and I've always
heard that there was honor even
among thieves. Don't you agree
with me?'' she added, appealing to
the major.
"Well, man has to take his chance
when he can get it ndersuch circum-
stances, = said the major noncommit-
tally. "Still, / don't think / should
have managed it in just that way''
"Ah! | was sure OF that! Now,
how would you have managed it,
major?"
sWell, think Ishould have slipped
upon him and quickly stuck a knife
into him; then I'd have put on his
coat and hat, SOS to disguise myself,
and taken his gun and gone over to
where the horses were picketed and Sc
lected me a good horse. A man on
foot has no chance against mounted
pursuers. y
"Of course, commented Miss Clara,
triuuphantly, apparently quite over
looking the inhunanity of sticking
knife into an unsuspecting man.
"That would have been far more gal
liant; more like a real soldier
There was such a chorus of assent
to this imposing programme that
Miss Valeria looked quite crestfallen,
but Bachelor Jim rallied bravely to
the defense.
Well, you see,' he said. IT hadn't
any knife, but if I'd Nv stuck him, and
not happened to hit vital spot, why
he'd Nv hollered out and grabbedhold
of me, and I'd Nv been shot on the
spot"
"Of course!D said Miss Valera, bor-
rowing Miss Clara's expression, and
returning the sarcastic smile with in
terest.
aAnd as for the horse" continued
Bachelor Jim, that's very well in
daylight, when a mans bound to
run, that is if he's dead sure he's got
the fast horse. But at night a fellow