The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1888-11-17
CONFIDENTIAL POINTERS.
A FEW SMALL IDEAS. WISE AND
OTHERWISE.
A Ne~ Departure for Local Newspapers AZ
all Depends oa schere she sras Born.
The Dersf's Deputy shoscs his
Hand - sereroi fdeas.


Local newspapers have complained Of
nothing since election, other than a
scarcity OF local news. Now, why not,
instead OF complaining drop onto the
scheme of an up country paper, and print
news like the following:
Miss Jessie Campbell. while lndulging in the
graceful pastime OF tackIng down acarpet, tackled
down her hnger with the business end OF the
hammer the other day.
Here Il a glorious opportunity Tor
papers in general, and the field
thus opened is one wide, long and varied
AS regards distance and condition. For
instance, how il would thrill readers to
hear that:
Miss -, Of Third street, while en-
gagged in frying pancakes on an old style
griddle, severely burned her middle finger
by spatter OF hot grease, and will be
unable to thump the piano for week or
two.
Another
The charming Miss , Of Eighth
street, while engaged with a mirror and
"A pair OF shears, in trimming her bangs,
accidentally ran a point OF the clippers,
into the bridge OF her nose, causing n
painful wound and one that will require
weeks application Of black court pIas-
ter 60 heal.
Or this
The wife of u prominentcitizen OF Crys-
tai Falls, while inserting a patch in her
husbands pantaloons severely pticked
her finger, and the D. C. viii be obliged to
remain IN bed until the wound heals.
These examples nre enough to give my
suffering brothers an inbling of what
might he worked mp in the above line and
] trust il win be espeodilyputin operation.
SEE by my Democratic exchanges,
that they are still kicking about ssm.
Stephensous money and the uses be- puts
IL to. Mr. Stephenson earned his money
by honest toll and has n perfect right 60
spend il as he wants To-, il seems To me.
TO be sure it is expensive husness 10 be
n cnndidateior SO high an noiIice as he has
u4t acquired, bat il WAS certainly not
his money that secured IL; il was his
popularity anil worth-mark that Now,
let me 20 q little farther. What about
Burt? Is he nll right2 Power had no
money, but Burt puttup the stuii--l feel
safe IN saying tcu times the amount our
congressinan-elect did Mir. Stephenson
did not throw hi, money broad east with
instructions 60 get votes, cost what they
would, nor did he remark that he would
rather lose a million dollars than the
seat he wasaftcr Mr. Stephenson made
his cnnvass in husiness-like manner,
and was not elected by Doodle, nor was
Any attempt made in that direction. IT
is about time now thedemocratic papers
dropped the chestnut, s. NJ. Stephenson,
and ten something OF Burt's doodle and
how it was used during the campaign.
H
THE FOLLOWING j. from my supply OF
clippings and il conclusive evidence that
a. girls dispositiondepcnds entirely upon
when she was born.
II a drl Is born IA Jaunary she win be u pru-
dent housewife given 10 melancholy but good
temper.
n IN February. humane and anectionate
wife. aud tender mother.
n March, inclined 10 sadness. but farsecing,
kind and liberal,
Ifin April. inconstant not very intelligent,
hut likely Co be good looking
n May. handsome, alnable, and likely 20 be
hapTs
Hin June. impetuons win marry early and be
fr1vuons.
II July. passably handsome. but with a
sulky temper.
hin August, amialic and practical, ana likely
60 marry rich.
Ifiu September. dascreet afablc and much
liked
lin October eoqactthh and nkeIy to be IN
happy.
Ifin November. liberal. Kind and of a mild
disposition
II in December velI-proportioned, fond of
novelty and extravaeent.
THE mostcontemptible, lowliycd piece
of dcviltry ever heard Of wasattomptod
here on Thursday evening Willie the
wagon containing the log cabin was
standing in ihestrpct near the Lockwood
house awaiting the forming Of tho pro-
ccssion, some sneakngcur pup saturated
one end % il with kerosene oil and set Il
ahrc, but fortunately the blaze WAS dis
covered and extinguished before any
harm waedone. Snchan act entities the
PERSON who did il 20 tho rank Of the low.