St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1888-07-28
FULL OF FUN.

-Minnie-'.Papa what b Vola.
puks" Papa-"why. it's the uni-
versal language. Minnie - But
who speaks it?' Papa-'.Nobody."- -
Binghamp,on Repxb!ieas.'
Re: .aurant Guest '.Whew! The
cook must have dropped her
vinaigrette into the short-cake. +"
Waiter-T guess you've struck q
strawberry. sab. "-O"sska World
-.Snagsby. you arc prcsumins
upon my credulity. You never killed
one hundred and fifty rabbits in one
day." ..Wilkins. / assure you l have
not deviated a harc frem tho truth. "
Chicago Tribune.
An Irishman took the cars al
Boston for Worcester On jumping
from the cars he remarked that III he
had known no could hive made the
journey in SO short time he would
have walked afoo,!'
-Blenkins says he thinks he knows
where most Of the pirb 60 to. He
made the discovery thD other night
when he was doing tho Infant
PATROL in his bare feet.
doctor (who finds aaramp groan.
ing by the roadsi,le) )-t'What is the
matter with you?" Tramp (iolefully)
MY system is all run down" Doc.
tor-..By what?' Trsmp-..By o
dog" Burlington Free Press
There is a man." be said. ''who
you would scarcely think is making a
handsome income by lis pcn." u
certainly would noi." was tho reply;
''hc looks any thing but literary"
But hc does; he is dino museum
freak. !, and writes with \ $ toe."-M
-Countryman Ito furditure dcaler)
II want to git bed an a mattress"
Dealer-''Ycs sir; spripg bed and
spring mattress l Isposc.l sirs' Coun.
tryman-'No; / want that kind that
kin be used all tho year around"-
Epoch
Mistress Of the Hpuss Ito grocer's
boy)-''Tell your omployrr to send .
boy better dressed next time. Boy
There amt no boy in town better
dressed nor what / am. The grocer
dresses mo three or four times a dav.
and when gifts home dad gives me
dressin' down too" "-7s1as Siftings.
According to DONG you mus,
never heed any little accident you
should happen to mcot with when out
any where. 1t looks vulgar. When
you unwittingiy sit down upon lady's
very best bonnet don't appear con-
ccrned. but smile pleasantly and &C,
rs If nothing had happercd. Other.
wise. it would appear rs II you thought
i. the only bonnet she hal. Til- Bits
My little boy is wonderfully po-
litc," said doting mother the other
day. And yet it is recorded of the
very polite little boy that he left
lady standing in the hall Of Lis
mothers home one day while no went
the rounds Of tho house anil grounds
yelling at the top Of his voice:
Mother. mother. where be your
Where be YOU. say? Tho now min.
is,er's wife is here and l forgot to tell
her you wasn't home. "-Kingsson
Freeman
Now. Lizzie. said . runl mother
to her daughter. who was about 10
make her first visit to the city. ''when
you git TO your Uncle Johns house
You must keep your eyes open. like I
did when l was there. SOS not to make
any mistakes and appear green. And
l tell you now that you mustn't pour
your coff,e out into your sasser and
blow it like us old.fashioncd folks does
here at home; no. Lizzie. you must
blow it in the cup And don't cat
pie and per:at toes and such things
with your knife; use a spoon. I'd bo
drstfully 'shamo.l il / thought you'd
make any mistake fore your uncle's
folks "-Harpcr's BazE.