Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1888-05-26
HUMOR.

PAPERS that don't give credit are
published by hook and by crook.
WHERE is no mans land? Where
the gnome man burrows, of course.
They have a society journal in Ben
gal that is much read by the Ben
gals.
THEY are making glass tombs now.
A glass tomb much sometimes brings
a man there.
! You saved ten thousand souls, st. Peter said,
Ana all the little angels were Irprised 70
| Yes, said the parson. us he bowed his head,
You see my sermons were all advertised"
a MAN who did not recognize meta
physician explained that he had never
metaphyscian before. - TerdS SIT
tugs.
TIE man who only drinks on some
particular occasion, finally gets so that
he isn't at all particular what the occa-
sion may be.-Teras Sittings.
New York has Fruit Exchange, but
it should not be forgotten that the first
fruit exchange was established in the
Garden of Eden. -TerGS S{ttiIlgS.
TIE party which expects to win sue
cess by evas on of public questions is
rs far "of" rs the cook who tries to
make buckwheat cakes out of the bat
ter of baseball club-SaH Fran
is 0 alta.
"CoNsTANT Reader" is informel that
to preserve fruit there is nothing SUI
perior to high fence garnished with
broken glass bottles. Some persons,
however, still think the bulldog method
preferable. boston Trans ript
your husband Is something of an
antiquarian, isn't hep asked a caller
of Mrs. Snaggs. mo, | don't think he
is, was the reply. 81 don't think he
can tell one kind o. an ant from an
other. "-B1WiiHgtOn Free Press.
The new Democratic paper in Chi
cago is called the GiOJe This will
will do, but it would have sounded bet
ter to call it the Earth. There isn't a
man in Chicago who wouldn't take the
earth if he got chance. Peoria
Transcript
"SAY, Pat, if you'll come around
every evening and clean out my
furnace, I'll give you 81 week. Sure
an OF will, sor-but what will Oh be
dom nights whin TIL ould woman takes
me away to the thly-ay ter?' H1uiHng-
tom Free Press.
81 THINK you are rath runjuSL to me,
father" said fast young man; I'M
necessarily severe, as it were. | have
not the advantages which you enjoyed
when you were young" what do you
mean by that, sir?" "YOlr father was
poor you know.-Pu l..
CUSTOMER - Are these nevkties
strong? Shopman - Strong? Why,
sir, last week | sold one to n gentle
man as was a-'ankering after suicide,
and e liked it so much that e used it to
'ang ITSELF, and it bore is weight beau
tiful. Globe.
GENrLEMAN-W are YOU doing
now, Sam? SAM amt dom muffin,
sab; | frow2d up my job las week. |
had trubble wifi de boss, an | Jess tole
him he cLddent fool dis cullud gem
man no mo- Use independent, | is. An
ole aunt O mine died an lef me twenty
fl dollahs. -Epoch
OMAHA man-From Dakota, Ell?
Speaking of Dakota reminds me of
blizzard / Dakota manila, hal
Wasn't it funny? Sunny? The biz
zard was" 81 should say so! Near
ly laughed myself into fits over 1t. !"
Laughed, over n biz ard! What biz
zard?" "The one in New York of
course. omaha u Orid.
CoURT-Did you search the prison
er's pockets. Policemen Yes, your
honor Court Did you find anything
in them? Policcman-Yes,y your honor.
Court-Was it counterfeit money?
Policeman--No, your honor. Court
Did you find any jewelry or burg lars
tools? Policeman-No, your honor.
Court-What did you find in his pock
cts? Policeman-Nothing but holes. -
ArcOId lie ORD.