The Arizona champion. [volume] (Peach Springs, Mohave County, A.T. [Ariz.]) 1883-1891, 1888-10-27
WEEKLY CHAMPION
BITS OF FUN.

IL any boat can shoot the radid
successfully we should think !
would be the guuboat. --Oceanr
There are four kinds Of tobacco
The long-cut, shortcut, fne-cut ane
Observation-Disclosures.
There's a good deal Of difierenc
between Southdown mutton ant
down South mutton. w ashington
ID. Q. Critic,
One Way to Save Doctors. Bill
BE moderate in your desires
Don't eat mince pie and cold buck
wheats together, -Pittsburg Chron
i,le.
! 1t is really cruel Of the organ
grinders to get under the window Of
Governor Hills sleeping apartment
and play, "The Letter that Never
Came. IN. Y. Tribune.
There are lots of people who mix
their religion with business, but
f,rgot to stir il up well. As a
result, the business invariably rises
to the top,--Meth9dfst Advance.
Lenox owes its popularity to the
sllubrity of its air, Il is q sort of
millionaire that people go there for,
particularly if they have marriage
able daughters.-Harper's Bazaar.
Some one says 'dollar wheat in
Chicago means a piano for the
farmers daughter. Nothing OF
the kind. 1t means bric-a- hrsc for
cold Hutch's daughter,-rN Y.
Journal.
"a good deal of real estate is
changing hands," said a neighbor,
.'Oh, no." answered witty pur-
chaser. "a good deal of money is
changing hands, that's the real state
of the case. -Nantuckot Inquirer.
Business Ways-ClerkrWhy do
you want these apple barrels mark,
ed "Open this endi" What differ
ence does it make what, end is
openedl Fruit-dealer-We can't
afford to pack large apples at both
dends of the barrel, sir.-Drakes
Magazine.
A correspondent wishes to know
if writer's cramP" is common
complaint among those who earn
their living by their pen. 1t is, to
certain extent; the cramps being
usually felt in the, region of the
writer's pocket book Pittsburg
Bulletin. 80
He Was Acquainted with It
Examining Doctor OF Divinity Ito
candidate for orders)-You are
thoroughly familiar with the Bible;
Of counsel Candidate-Yes, sir;
| acted as book agent in vacations,
and tool orders for large number.
.-Drake's Magazine,
A man who said he wished to
find paper which said nothing
about the tariff came into our Office
this morning and asked the privi-
Iege of looking over our exchanges
1t was granted, and after two hours
of hard labor the man departed
saying, as he went out: "T'm not
left yet; I'll buy a paper of pins"
Returned Traveler--In CaIifor-
MIA | saw the statute Of the man
who first discovered gold there in
49, representing him with one
shoulder thrown grandly back and
his right hand pointing dramati-
cally downward. Disgruntled
Mining Spectator Yes, as if to
say, There is where l am going
when l get through hera. ~ Chicago
Tribune.
Ipventor-I have new descrip- |
ton of ship, which wish to bring |
before the notice of the Navy De
partment Clerk-In what partic- |
ular is your invention newl-In-
ventor-Why, it is made to dive,
SO that directly the enemy com-
menca firing at it goes to the bot
tom. Clerk tcontemptuously) u
There is nothing novel about that,
my dear sir. Nearly all our ships
ire built in that way; in, fact, many
If them 60 to the bott,m without
.lls trouble of firing at them. Good
norning.-Exchange.