Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1888-05-25
Or. E0USEB'S SRWB1ek.


suburbs of a large cityin the Father
land His business connections were
OF such q nature that he was usually
at leisure otter four O'Clock In the
afternoon.
Mr.. Mouser Prided himself on being
a man of originality aud brains. Mr..
Mouser also liked a little joke-at
other peoples expense.
It vas Autumn. Mr.. Eoussr had
just laid in q gOodly supply OF winter
fuel Wood vas chiefly used for this
purpose in the land of Mr.. Eouser's
birth.
Sitting by the window Of his cosy
living-roOnn. enjoying a royal smoke
rom the lOng-stemmed porcelain pipe,
Mr.. MOuser watched the wood-seWyeF
plying his trade, made easy by long
habit of handling wood and saw. AS
Mr.. MOuser gazed and pOndered an
idea crept into his head. 1t was
gasped-as ideas quickly became
captive there
''Lizbeth," said he to his wife, sit Is
singular never thought OF it before
I generally think of such things-but
it strikes me that I could saw that
wood myself"
"Gracious! what an ideal"
ga bright one, isn't it? A big saving,
tool Just see with what ease it Is
dOne-the man cuts through the
sticks as If he were slicing bread and
butter; besides, I require more exer-
else; my health is not what it has
been"
"Why, dear, do you feel Zip"
''N-no, but a man needs to exert
himself if he does not wish to run
down in muscular power. My habits
are too combining; a sense OF this fact
has been growing on me lately But /
have solved the difficulty while watch
ing that man play on his saw-jack."
A merry twinkle of the eyes and a
laudable endeavor to maintain a Sc
rious expression would have con.
WINGED the beholder that Lizbeth
also had ideas but like a properly re-
spectful wife she kept them to herself
until called for.
''Do you think, Lizbeth, that a lit
tie gentle muscular activity is what ]
need to stimulate appetite.?"
''You might paint the house or do
some less tiresome work than wood
saving, - replied Mrs. Mouser.
ooh, you underrate my capacities,
my dear. And saving wood is not
such hard work. Come and see how
simply it is done, yet how every mus
Gle is brought into play. 1 am en-
chanted with my idea. and shall carry
it out. The man can finish this Job,
but it shall be the last ever pay Tor.
What think you OF it Wife?'
"Well,' laughed the lady demurely,
81 think we shall be obliged to live on
cold victuals and wear blankets TO
keep from freezing. But seriously
dear, you had better consider what
hard labor you are planning Tor your
self. If 1 were you 1 would experiment
on a few cordsticks and assure my
self that it is as easy as it looks
That's just like a woman retOrt
ed MOuser, dIsdainfully; ''she never
does anything heroically; she is total
d " incompetent in matters Of physica
calculation. Now can see Just 81
we'll as If I had stood over that mans
saw-jack for an hour the amount o
force required to drive saw through
! a stick of cOrd-wOOd. And I declare
3 to you here and now am going to Dc
the next load myself 1t is play; moth
. ing but play"
that Mr.. MOuser turned UpOn her in {
, furry of Indignation, saying:
You seem to have your doubts
4 madam
4 ''Seeing is believing, sir!''
e ssWeH, YOU shall see. You ought Il
Q know bv this time that I am mai
e with a mind of my own, and when
}. say I am going to do a thing 1 do 1t
o Please bear this in your shallow men
o tal1ty, Mrs. MOuser, that 1, your hus
s band, am determined to never NOR
Il pay one dollar for a wOOd-saWyer'
. hire"
e 81 am afraid I shall have to do
t little Of the wOOd-sawing myself, then,
d gravely murmured Mrs. MOuser.
= Mr.. MOuser meant business. He a
is once ordered the very best kind Of
saW-iack made. He purchased
3 splendid saw, with sharp teeth an
IS q light frame. He pranced about
+, baDpV as q schOObOy, with dab
II of yellow and green pain
e spattered all over his person, unit
e finally the saw frame suited him in II
IS bright yellow coat. The saw-jack
Is painted a lovely light green
/ Daily ne prOmenaded Impatient
It around the sheds where the wood we
n stored, and grumbled because the fu'
le lasted so unusually long. At intel
is walls he added another coat OF gree
1t paint to the highly decorated saWinl
al lack (sawbuck, 1t IS called SOM
NJ times), and bade all his acquaintance
q and friends come and inspect hi
q. patent calisthentic toys, until ever