The Pascagoula democrat-star. (Pascagoula, Miss.) 1878-1920, 1888-06-15


lied only two flights up. The top
floor remains lis ante hellum sim
pllclty.
"Why, it's perfect, J" SAID MY wife.
"the very coloring | have dreamed
of" and |, being of a very sym.
pathetic nature, genially shared her
enthusiasm and buried all bilee.
water tendencies deep in my own
breast. "l've got the fixtures and
all complete" went on my wife
when We had worked off some of
our rapture, "and l had the ladder
brought up thinking you would
put them up so | could see how
they look from the outside" II
occurred 10 me at the time that my
wife would have to let herself down
from the roof for that purpose as
the few square feet of soil which
comprises our back lawn only pro-
duces an area to comfortably swing
a cat in, and a position at its ex-
treme limit would hardly get the
angle of vision above the second
floor. However, | did not say so.
A man cannot be too careful about
throwing cold water upon these
little cherished schemes of his bet
ter half. | knew from experience
that my wife would prefer IN this
case to go out in the back yard,
press her Psythe knot against the
boundary fence, crane her neck,
roll her eyes back under her bangs
and stare at the brick wall in a
very knowing and unbecoming
way.
1t was decided | should put the
shades up at once, aud | according
ly placed the ladder in position
and climbed up to adjust the fix
lures. 1t was a lovely day in early
summer, and the pungent smell
of solitary ailanthus tree IN bios
som hallway down the court came
to me mingled with the heavy in
cense of trying meat in somebody's
nearby kitchen. A pretty girl was
sewing at window opposite, and
| remember | stiAed desire to
take off my coat in Difference to
the presence of unknown female
beauty, and also that | wished in
an idle, desaltory sort of way,
while | reposed at length upon the
stepIadder, that my wife would be
called down stairs.
This depression is in strict ac-
cordance with the best authority in
novels. 1t is considered effective
to pause as the climax approaches
and descant in detail upon all un.
interesting and irrelevant sur
rOundlngs. 1t is also quite CONNIE
IL faWt among US writers TO finish
such di2ressions with some sent
ence like, "And to this day the
perfume of Il cardamom seed or
the shrlll jarg0n of an elevated
railroad brakeman quickens my
pulses and sends the hot blood
leaping through my veins" Like
wise, to me, now and forever, as
the red rag is TO the quick-temper.
ed male bovine, so is the yellow
paint Of a Stepladder. Oh, for a
thousand horns, to gore it to a
bloody death!
The first shade went up with the
ease and celebrity of bulled stock,
and | stood on the floor within two
minutes trying the spring and dis
coursing in light and airy manner
10 my wife:
"These shades are all right, An
ME. Her name Is Mary Ann, but
she likes me to drop the Mary and |
spell it with an 'e.' | wish you had |
'ent home The rest. l have just
about time before dinner to do the
whole business. The last tenant
| was pounding in a fixture of the
second one now oblgingly lett the
race of his work, so the measure
nents are all right. ! don't always
eel like tinkering about the house,
mt I'm in the mood to-day-hand
ne the other shade, Nan-and if
lad them all we could Eo. to bed
o-night feeling that another big
tep toward settling-hello ! here,
his shades too longp
"Oh, presume so" said my wife,
heerfully. II fancy they are not
inform; that is the reason, doubt.
ess, they are sold so cheap"
l got down and found the roller
1ould have to be cut shorter. We
ad no saw, of course, but the big
'ladc of my knife and the tack
ammer would work all Sight, l
hought, had to take off The small
astiron arrangement Of one end
f The collier before cut il, and
1hen had replaced 1t after the
peration, | found the shade itself
'as a little too wide for the roller.
But obviated this by laying, un-
bserved by my wife, a small fold
a the linen, which | dented down
7ell with my thumb and finger.
hen ran up the stepladder aud !
roceeded TO hang the shade. The
)rmer tenant, who had so kindly
sft The relics OF his work, had used
utside fixtures, into whose places
had confidinglY tackled inside
nesl In measuring the shade at
he window. however, / had con-
silently born in mind that my fix
lres were INSIDE ones, consequent.
: there was a marked discrepancy I
etween the two.
l didn't run down the stepladder
nat time. l climbed down some.