The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1888-07-14
Life And Manners.

Tact is a product of good feeling and
quick observation. Essential to 1t is
sympathy with others, and it is essen
tial TO true courtesy. No man by
merely learning rules of etiquette can
acquire habits of courtesy. Even ii he
does learn the rules and obey them, he
will be angular, unnatural, cold. His
actions will not be the product of an
inward feeling. They will, therefore,
not be the expression of his own ma
ture. His love will always be with
Discrimination. The foundation of true
courtesy is the law: "Thou shalt love
thy neighbor as thy self :" the rule of
true courtesy is: edo unto others as
you would that others should do unto
you.' The king who violated the mos,
aiphabetic law of etiquette, by pouring
cool and then drinking it from his saul
guest who had done so, while the cour-
tiers laughed in their sleeves at his ig-
norance, exhibited model OF court
esy, because he showed a perfection Of
tact. Courtesy is simply love applied
in social life to the conduct OF small
affairs. Good feeling and good sense
underlie almost all rules of courtesy.
The first thing, therefore, for one to do
who wishes to develop n courteous
habit Is to develop good feeling and
good sense. THIS truth finds express.
ion in the Greek original rendered in
our English Bible, be courteous; II is
literally be iriendlyminded. All true
courtesy is the product of a friendly
mind. Boorishness is product of
scltishness far more than n product OF
ignorance or at least n product of that
Ignorance which is itself n product OF
seifishness. WAS once at wedding
breakfast in n rural community In the
west. The groom ate in silence the
food that was set before him, dispatch
ed his meal before the rest Of us were
more than half through, pushed back
his plate, wiped his mouth with the
back of his hand, and, turning to his
bride, said: "Weil, Sally? you may
as well got used to my way at the be-
ginning, and always leave the table
when l have got through with my
meal" With these words he went out
TO pick his teeth on the doorsieps,
leaving his bride with a flushed face
and panied heart, the object of our
commiseration. The man was boor
you say. True! What made him q
boor? The fact that he selfishly
thought only Of his own comfort. 1t
never entered his head to inquire
whether his conduct would be agree
able or painful to his bride.
The foundation of courtesy is laid in
the home. IT early lessons are not
taught there it is well-nigh impossible
to compensate for the lack by subse-
quent culture. Ii the child is taught
to be unseifsh, sympathetic, considers
ate ofthe feelings ofothers in the home,
he will carry this habit with him
wherever he goes. He may be iguor-
ant of those conventional laws of ETH
quote which vary in different locali,
ties, but he will everywhere be re-
cognizsd as a man of good breeding.
Thus 1t is that courtesy becomes a
family and even national trait. The
Frenchman and the Japanese are cour-
teous, because they are trained to con~
slider the feelings Of others. The Ed.
glish as nation are not courteous. !
Their courtesy is matter of court
etiquette, aud adjusts itself according |
to classes. There is more conscience |
on the English side of the channel,
more courtesy on the French side. So, |
again, courtesy shows itself in certain |
old families. 1t has become a second |
nature by long processes of training and
inheritance. Nothing can quite take
the place of good breeding in pre-
ducing good manners, for nothing less