The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-01-16
THE UNWELC0ME VISITOR.
A STRANGE GUEST AND THE sINoU-
LAR WAY IT APPEARED.
Spring and Winter Blend Their Char
acteristics and Cause CONSERVATION
and Comment - The South Joins
Hands with the Northwest.

Hands with the Northwest.
Years and years ago some nameless
genius. with ideas chasing each other in
rapid succession over his frame, and leap
Ing thence into the dreamy realms OF the
muses., inflicted upon n good naturcd pub
lie the now famous poem, 1.-The Snow, the
Snow, the Beautiful SNOW" then doubled
himself up like jack-knife and died.
Little did he dream at the time his in
spired goose quill dashed OF those lines Of
the immortal fame that lowered lovingly
and with garlands Of choicest flowers over
his head. 80 great wasthc run Of thissoul-
reaching poem in the daily and weekly
newspapers and literary periodicals Of the
land that envy and unscrupulousness
prompted many claimants for the dis
tinciion OF authorship. Unlike al
most anything known 10 history,
the poem was republished In every
part OF the country rs soon
as possible after each snowfall, sometimes
~ many AZ a hali-dozcn times during a
winter. In some newspaper offices the
editor had II steeotyped and labeled, and
when the frst heecy fake came floating
down on n stray zephyr his devil was
given instructions 10 "let 'cr slidc"-mean-
ing the plate OF snow poetry.
IT GREW MosOroSoUs.
Ere many days this practice grew mo-
notonous. The gentle reader. at II 30 a
year, paid in potatoes, cabbage aud cord
wood, lost his mild manners and rose In
arms. The odc had been committed 10
memory and forgotten too oft, and pa
tienco over It's persistent rcappcaranco
rushed headlong through the rear window.
Rather would the &. 7. look upon the
blurred and unsightly wood-cut advertise
ment OF Mrs Parnody's Balm for Teeth
ing Infants" Anonymous warnings were
sent delinquent editors, failing 10 heed
which a scorc or more were laid under the
frozen sod. their graves being hidden
from mortal gaze by the beautiful visitor
they had ~ frequently announced. This
salutary method Of revenge finally taught
u valuable lesson-thc people would not
be iriiled with. The last oticnse and swift
rclribution Of this character were reported
from Manitoba, where seventeen feet Of
snow coyer the earth thirteen months Of
the year. A daredevil editor kept the OBJ
noxious pocin running for thrco weeks,
and when the succeeding mornings sun
nJsc In undimmed briliancy, his body WIS
found hanging To the limb III n magnolia
tree, and crows rested upon II while watch
ing patron OF husbandry plant corn on n
ncighboring farm. On the breast Of the
dangling corpse appeared. IN black letters
on a pslslc-board box lid, these brave
words: "llc dciicd our ire. and We ircd.
Many readers" There Is, and has been
from that day, price upon the head Of
any man, woman or child offending after
the manner of the Manitoba editor, even
for one insertion In nm obscure corner
Of the paper. With this appalling
fact staring Tng ArrEAL In tho lace, Il
cannot be ccnsurcd for refusing to comply
with the request Of "Many Readers" Ia
rcpnblish "Tho Beautiful Snow this
morning.
ITS CHARACTER uNFAvoRAnLK.
For another reason, the urgent invita-
ton must be declined: Il the substance
now covering the streets, alleys, house
tops, aud filling the eyes, ears aud noslrils
| OF man aud beast caught from out shelter.
ing walls, really the genuine "brauiituli'
On this point analytical chemists are yet
In animated conference, with prospects Of
n final inharmonious indefinite adjourn.
mcnt, and possibly general and pcrina-
ncnt rupture. The majority insist that
ons-thirl Of the substance II mud, two
thirds pellets Of unauthorized Ice, aud
the remainder may bc snow. Tho differ
cnce Of opinion hinges Upon the percentages
Of the former Scientists ON the outside
Of the conference chamber entertain equal
ly varied opinions Those who felt their
feet suddenly rebel against continued con-
tact and two seconds later bchcld myriads
81 lightning bugs toying with their eye
brows, are unallerably attached 30 tho
opinion that the leo crop Of the country
las been transported % this city and
vicinity. Aud this theory Ia advocated by
nine ont Of every ten who vcnturcd from
comfortable houses, M every condition
favored II. The other Onc-tenth only wink
and smile, take another "smile, and hope
for n speedy change. lest their peace II
mind and soundncss Of body he disturbed.
Only thosc who remained indoors all day
give allegiance 10 the snow idea.
SOMETHING'S ooxE wRoSo.
There Is no dispuiing the fact that there
4 something wrong here. Old residents
find Il difficult ~ locate precedent for the
present frozen aud slippery condition of
things aud the manner Of It's advent Before
half ot Saturday night had passed, signif.
cant pclting Of window panes. roofs of
hous,s and awnings warned every one 10
look ont for n touch OF arctic weather.
Early In tho morning, roaring thunder and
ominous flashes Of lightning got mixed up
In The disturbance, and left peculiar in
fiuence. Thus we're winter and spring
blended. and none could say which WIS
'tothcr. without the aid Of ovcroais and
carmufis 10 the superstitious this was
alarming. and they aid one 10 another, in
saaee whispers, surely we are soon 10 be
] osiI.J 90 /. aasi ss.'s's-ss--" rl-.is-.L.