Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1888-03-29

1 call it forward. do. There's Hell
ena, whose writing is that bold tnaS II
always makes me blnsh."
Everybody laughed, and Tankerdaie
said: Aunt Jane still writes with flne
old gold pen she used thirty years ago
A modern rib is so broad that it shocks
her."
IS Do you find the autograph hunters
very tiresome?" said Helena to me.
'They are pests" I answered. III
they had been numbered amongst the
plaques of Egypt Pharaoh would
either have given in much sooner. or
settled the Jewish question by whole.
sale massacre"
''Give me the autograph at the foot
of a check" murmured Cudgell. in his
.coffee-cup. with his eye on the host
when was young" said Aunt
Jane, II once had a letter from
Grimaldi, the famous clown. you know.
Long before your time" added the
old lady, looking at me. "Ay. clowns
were clowns in those days" She
seemed to believe that Twas Grimaldi's
successor. and very poor substitute.
"But hope you don't think every
one pest who asks for your auto
graph" said Helena.
"By such a request from you. !
should feel honored," said L "But
the general nuisance is SO great that ]
am obliged to tell these people what !
really think of them And then I ex-
planned my glorious scheme for scarf.
flying the autograph hunter. and eman-
cipating my brothers in distinction and
distress.
EXCELLENT said Cudgell; "but
wouldn't it be rather awkward if you
were to meet some of them, say at q
table like this?''
"Mr. Fitzphosphorus knows his
friends too WELL" said Helena
Don't be too sure of that" laughed
her father. IF you had sent him an
autograph album. you might have had
whitening quotation like the rest"
At this curious shiver of PRESENT.
ment ran through me. and 1 looked i'm
quiringly at Helena, who had a queer
ly mysterious expression in her eyes.
But here the irrepressible old lady
broke in again.
"When l was young" she qua
vered, "they used to write verses
about me. My brother Charles picked
up piece of paper one morning. and
said it was dropped by the man who
swept the chimney. l remember two
lines very well indeed
"'Queen OF Beauty. while you sleep.
Dream you OF your chimney-sweep!"
Don't you know that l sent you
my autograph album" said Helena.
suddenly.
My blood ran cold. IL have not 70
ceived it," 1 gasped.
lit was some time ago." she said.
Il had never asked for an autograph
before. and l thought would try the
effect of the request on the only emf
nent man l know. 1 scarcely knew
you at all, though. when sent the al
bum. And to make the onslaught all
the more formidable. sent book for
papa and another for Aunt Jane. But
of course you have overlooked them"
remembered with horror that only
that very morning 1 had cleared of
some arrears of albums in a great hur-
ry and very bad temper. that l had
not examined the names of the sender.
and had left them to be addressed aud
posted by somebody else.
Was it a fancy. or did l hear the
postman's knock? A few minutes later
q servant entered with three books.
"Why. here they are!" cried Hele-
ma, gleefully.
"Now. we shall see how Mr.. Fitz-
phosphorus distinguishes his friends"
said Cudgell. with malicious smile.
l never liked that man.
Take some more claret and brace
yourself up" said Tankerdale
But was far beyond the terrifying
aid of claret. saw Helena glance at
one of the books turn pale and then
fiery red. look at the other albums. and
then. with one indignant fash at me.
rush from the room.
"Hallor' said Cudgell, "you have
been pitching it strong. This is Hell
ena's quotations: God has given you
one face. and you make yourselves an
other Here's crusher for you. Tam
kerdale: How like a fawning publican
he lOOksr'
by George. sir! cried my hest
bouncing out of his chair. tthis is a
deliberate insultr'
"And here is a sweet thing for Aunt
Jane" continued Cudge. striking .
dramatic attitude: '..Aroint thee,
witch! the rump-fed ronyon cries. >"
The old lady was purple with fury.
calls me witch and an onion. does
hep" she screamed. when I was
young. my brother Charles would have
broken his head. Now there's NO one
to protect memo one-though . vag-