The prison mirror. [volume] (Stillwater, Minn.) 1887-1894, 1888-05-16

eggs IL Eggs''..A Maiden Effort.
Editor Mirror:
Whilst quietly ''dumping'' a "stick.full OF type
the other morning. and rumira tnR as to whether
life was worth living. If eggs had taken a sud-
den drop in the market 50 "a to give some one
chance to have general fll.out, was smitten
with gentle smite on the small Of my back by
the brawny arm of festive editor, he Of the big
biceps and jocular turn of mind. who said: s.Why
don't We hear something from you? Here the
paper has been running nine months and we have
all contributed little mite except yourself
Now. come. brace up. and give US same of those
efusons that we know can flow from that gifted
pen Of yours"
This was all very fine. and 1 felt fattered at
the time and swore a swear there and then to as.
found all OF the readers Of our paper next week
with an article that would put a Dickens to the
blush. and had to wear the big-headed mans old
cap to go and fetch my dinner with. 1 was turn
ing over in my mind which subject should start
on first, for had come to the conclusion that 1
would publish my writings in series. Botany
thought l. is good subject: but owing to the want
OF appreciation among the boys of that most di-
vine study, concluded to let her slide and tackle
some subject that the plebeian mind of our
readers could grasp, with hardly any mental
strain So. after mature study. thought it ad-
vsable to come down from my lofty perch among
the isms and give my ideas on a subject that was
calculated to interest the boys and if not to tickle
their minds-their palates. The momentous
question decided upon ives eggs-"h'eggs" the
boys say call them. but that's foul calumny.
Now, eggs are cheap and very nutritious and
can be bought for the nominal sum OF lie. per
doz. Eggs. if my knowledge of eggs does not mis-
lead me, are food for the-eh-brsin yes. brain,
something like fish. which we get once q week.
and which. by the way. notice is given out in
pretty large rations. But do not notice any
more brilliant ideas in the manuscript. that 1 set
up. than before. but might 1 suggest that whole
fs--but there Pm casting reflections. I'm
a lsw-abiding citizen. and q cloth wrapped. no
matter how artistically round my head does not
improve my personal appearance. SD I'll digress
and turn back to that chicken meat.
Eggs are, as 1 said BEFORE but lie. per dozen
and supposing that we got them once a week, on
Sunday morning. two apiece-that would amount
to %. 06. which is not . large amount to expend
upon over 400 convicts' breakfasts. Besides
being so cheap they are change from the ordin.
airy run of things. and sure that the boys will
work with twofold energy the following day.
(previding the eggs are good. 1 like eggs and
chicken both, but must say prefer the one fresh
and that the other shall have worn feathers in
his tail at least three inches long previous to his
decease.)
Now, this is not brilliant effort. one will dis
pute that, but it is my best. 1 am not intellect.
ual and know it-unlike some people-but this
article has got to go or there will be gore split
My battle-cry is "Give me eggs. or give me
liberty"
am better able to PROFOUND on the laws of
hygiene, professional philanthropy, metaphysics,
Marquis of Queensbury and
other sciences but as l before remarked the
average reader couldn't follow me, so I'll close.
But before doing so would like to tell some of
the inmates who CAN write that. am setting them
a good eggs-ample-no, take that back mean to
say that if half of them tried one-third as hard
to write we would have the sanctum flooded to
Ovefowing with first rate articles.
This, ahem, is my maiden effort. Il. C.
s. for the world bad form. The editor called this
blessing down upon himself; and she is going to
be published or something is going to bust.
TIC.
1.-THE alb owe in type last week. and though
the "h'eggs' materialized last Sunday, it is too
good to killed.
Lost in the Clouds.
gentleman of Hibernian descent has con-