The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1888-02-15

| auu uses one of HE iJhe aud wili0vy legs
for steering apparatus, by which nc
euides the tohoggsn some way or rudder.
| 1t is easy to slide down hill on a toboggau.
In feet, after you start down, you can't do
anything else. True, You could fall of.
| That is easily done. The hVing machine
il not high, so you haven't very far 70 fall.
SILL, II You have TO fall from q to-
boeeen half way down the slide, or else
| sail down stairs with kitchen stove, you
take the stove and the stairs every time. 1t
isn't go exciting, and IL isn't 80 soon. A
friend and a few days ago walked up the
stairway of a Canadian slide for tins pur.
pose Of trying the toboggan sensation. The
president of the club took his place aft,
and somebody said "Let her go.n Then We
stopped, and the president said, How did
we like it?" i left my breath at the top of
the slide, and We had to 60 up and get 1t.
The toboggsn is to any other way OF get.
ting down hill what flying is to going to
sleep. IL / was in q hurry, and it was
down hill all the way, would rather have
a tobog2sn than a pair OF wings, any day.
p. S-There is usually an angel on the
toboEgan With you, which has tendency
to confirm the impression that you are go
ing down with wings
n. B "A young Canadian OF broad ex-
| perience assures me that Toronto angels
really and TRULY have wings, insomuch
that often he has to drive with one hand,
using his other arm TO hold the angel from
flying away.
Addenda.-I have known the same thing
70 heppen in the United States.
GENERAL IGNORANCE.
Some OF the newspapers not long ago
made % end OF fun of a college graduate
who could not tell who discovered America.
On, well, my son, that is one OF the things
you don't learn In college. / am like the
above graduate; do not know who dis
covered America. III you know, or think
you know a man who does know, wish
you would tell me. ] would give some
money 10 learn just that much. l am
also away down in the spelling class.
cannot spell ShaikespeAr as SHAKESPEARE
! himself spelled IL. ] wish you would tell
me the proper way OF spelling the great
mans shame. 4 do not know why there are
60 many graY horaes, and no gray
colts. do not know whether the egg be-.
gan with the hen, or the hen started with
the egg ] can't understand why we can't
hud the North Pole when we know right
where II is. don't know why matinee
should come In the afternoon. / don't
know why man wears buttons on the
tails Of HE coat. i can't see what earthly
use an elephants tail is TO him. / don't
understand why people in town are always
wild TO 90 10 the country, and people In
the country are crazy 10 come 70 town.
Why don't they change places at once, and
b. done with il? do wish ] c;uld some.
where bear OF wise man who would de-
vote few hours every century 10 teaching
me few simple things that everybody
ought TO know, sud that everybody, ex-
cept you and |, seems to know already.
THE VALUE OF TINE
zone to-day" remarked a wise man, "is
worth two to.morrOws." Oh, is 1t, then
You 90 into the market with to-day and
see how many to-morrows you can get for
H.. You can't get one. Not a solitary one;
you can't even get tomorrow morning Tor
n. But il you have TO m orrow that you
want TO put on the market, you might get
a whole week OF to DAYS for it. Toe only
man who wouldn't offer to-day for IL Is the
nan who is going to be hanged to MORO ",
aud hes consequently very little use for t.
What he wants to trade for is about two
months OF yesterdays and a couple oil
weeks before last.
GIRLS AS REPORTERS.
oh, yes, dear, you can excel in newspa
per work A girl makes just as good q
reporter as a man. A great deal better, IL
fact But then you will labor under some
Disadvantages, being girl. W.sn you are
writing up a country fair, for instance, y1u
can't smoke in the eyes OF the good ole
-
what you are saying about her canned
pears and homemade bread. And yor
can't very well prod a class snperin tenden'
in the RIBS with a pencil and call him Say
And you can't cit on the parApet Of tht
grand stand and let your feet hang ovsl
during, the races. And You can't play
billiards and drink beer. Oh, you can
Well, then, you'd better forget bow, i
you're going to be a reporter else you'll
never have time TO do anything else.
BOYS AND FARMING.
"Why do the boys leave the farmp
walls 6 writer in an agricultural journal
Well, dear brother, there are several rea
sops. One is because the boy is not sixty
five years old at his birth. Then, if there
is hoe on the farm weighing fourteen
ounces bright as nickel.plate, and sharl
as a razor, and another hoe weighing
somewhat less than breaking pillow, will
: an edge on it Ike hammer, and ssplinI
with the bark Oh for q handle, the hireC
man takes one and the boy gets the other
and every man in America knows which
is the other. Did you ever stand with sucl
hoe in your hands away down in corr
{ row on some airless, still, hot summer day
> twenty acres of corn-blades and tassel
: whiting about you, standing fourteen iuche
higher than your head, shutting on
l every last trace Of breathable air. and thel
bear q locust down in the edge of the tim
: Der strike up his long, strident montonou
: call TO make il ten times hotter? Aud al
this time 8 cool creek, not a mile away
! lettering in deep, silent pools in shad.
| places in the woods or breaking into mel
{ ~ dancing ripples over the pebbles? An
in the big deep holes, the fish Just lynn
around waiting for 8 boy? Well, then
you know why some boys leave the farm
3 Still, boys can be kept on the farm AT
made to stay there all their lives, Y0
, | drive q long spike through boys abdC
3 men and through live-oak tree, an
clipch or bolt IL on the other side an
: then saw of the boys leg aud break b
4 back, and he will stay Oh the farm. Ye:
there are some other ways We know, bu
) this is the only 'infallible method.
I GIRL OF GOOD REPORT.
Oh peerless match less maid of minel
| Oh, witchirg girl, OF char ms dtvioe,
All other nymphs thou dost outshine
In roaring beauty Superfne!
Loud rings the finger OF thy fist,
And sturdy CUTS adorn thy wrist;
With many a wave your hair you twist,
And slash your dresses as you list.
| What ruffies round thy neck appear
} What hustle tells me thou art near
! | Powdered thy face sweet cannoneer.
Bang go thy locks Jana thou,art here.
D With cuff and rufile slihgtly unused;
With bang and hustle to adjust,
: And powder for thy match-thou must,
OF course, have most glorous bust
ROBERT ], BURDETTE.
Superstition of Actresses,
Galignani.