Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1888-09-20

WISE AND orHEnwlsE.
| Eson our exchanges.
Quiet conscience gives quiet sleep.
Not 70 hear conscience is way &
silence it.
A Cornell man was recently injured
by an accidental discharge OF his duties
Thirteen lean people commit suicide
20 one fat one. Flesh up aud save
your life.
Out Of all lives. actual and possible
each one OF us appropriates continually
into his own.
A restaurant keeper advertlses to,
"a boy to open oysters fifteen years
old"
What q shocking appearance the
corn6elds do present after the farmer
has cut of all the stocks and placed
them in order together.
Hoping fer mild winter and trust.
ing ia providence to temper the winter
TO your raw hide isn't the best way to
fatten steers for the spring market.
A small city girl visiting with her
mother at friends house in the coun-
try. and seeing some guinea hens, ex-
claimed: Mamma, look at those
chickens with calico dresses on.''
"You said, Mr.. skeesicks, that the
defendant was man Of easy circum-
stances; what do you mean by that?''
"A gentleman wot pays his printers,
and isn't afraid to look his butcher in
the FACET
Profanity never did any man the least
good. No man is richer, happier or
wiser for it. It commends no one to
society; it is disgusting to refined peo-
pie and abominable to the good.
The dreary, weary, croaker, will
have to die some day; perhaps he'll go
to heaven and walk the golden way;
he'll view the shining pavement with
gloomy eyes askant, and shake his
head and mutter: "They'er so extravi-
CANT"
We are told that the Siberian rail-
road will connect Napirsk, Chita
Irkutsk. Tomsck, Tobolsk, and Ekater.
ineburg. We think if these names
were connected and had handle ad-
justed TO the rear end they would make
a first-class meat-saw.
There is no greater fool on this
terrestrial foot stool than the man who
thinks he is going to paralize the in-
terror working Of newspaper Office by
coming in and bowling ''stop my pa
per-" Why bless your. little soul. that's
just what tickles US. When you stop
sit, you pay for it first, don't you see.
A Western lightning rod agent re-
Gently put all rivals to shame by the
following clincher on the merits of his
goods: You see, sir, our rods are
twisted from end to end. Well, the
makes dive for the top and
goes whirling down the rod, and before
it gets to the bottom it's so dizzy it
coulden't hurt a fly.
a limb of the law, In passing q chap
engaged IN posting bills, addressed him
thus: s.How are you, Wiliiam2" ''Iy
name is not William ssAh! I thought
your name was William, as I heard
them eau you Bill Sticker."
The making of true home is really
the peculiar and inalienahle right of
woman-a right which no man can
take from her; for q man can no more
make q home than a drone can make q
hive. He can build q castle or palace,
but. poor creature, be he as wise as
Solomon and os rich as Cresas, he cam
not turn it into q home.
A very distinguished prelate Of the
Episcopal church found himself strand
ed in little town away down In the
Of Maine last summer and
had to put up at . farm house, where
be was hospitibly entertained. s.Do
you have many Episcopalians down
here2'' he inquired or his hostess.
'sWeD. really now, I don't know she
replied; sOur hired man shot some kind
Of a peculiar cxittef down back Of the
barn the Other day, but be lowed Il was
. wood chuck.s
Horse Whispering
Is Is commonly befievedthatt there are
mysterious influences by
which an immediate ascendancy is
gained over the horse, independent of
The process of teaching or promptings
of xffection There was formarlu iu;nn