Morning journal and courier., 1888-11-16
BORROW ED.

Here to-day and gone neto-morrow-Them man who borrows a five dollar bill from you.- Bosten Courier.
 The bebustled female is careful when she sits down that she wrecks not her own reed. Boston Transcript.
 Since Sitting Bull has become fond of a foaming gargle his favorite anthem is s'Ale to the Chief."-Yonkers Gazette.
 ssIs that the bell of the scissors grinder outsidea asked Broughne. 'tNo," replied
 his wife. "You hear Mamies bangle braee- let. She's up stairs. ."-Norristown Herald.
 John Grasse is the name of prominent Sioux chief. When the Indian agent is pes- tered for favors by 8 pleading brave he tells him promptly to go to Grasse.-Boston Budget
 Your wife may be the boss of your roost, but if you get telephone put in your henss you can always count on having 8 voice in at least one thing about the house.-Yonksrs | Statesman.
 The latest instance of economy is that of a Boston man who declined to buy a compass to take into the Maine woods. He said that | he was 6 singer and could save expense by | using the compass of his voice.-Burlington | Free Press.
 1 It requires eight million dollars worth of | powder and cosmetics to paint the faces of
 ths dear ladies of tho country for one year. | 1 get little paint on their noses.-Arcola I Record.
 1 Shouldn't Have Been So Chipper.-f the Gazette had had any idea four years ago that l it hurt the Republicans as much to be beat- en as it does us now, we'll be dog goned if I we would have cIowed over them.-Terra | Haute Gazette.
 1 Master Tommy is sick, and also indisposed | to take the prescribed remedy. "Come, my | h twAr nat 1- l low your medicine" "I can't" "One al- ways can when one wants to-" "But don't | want to."-Exchange. The modern roofing materials in the coun- ] try are of great value in the moral and men, ! tai development of the American youth.
 Between the slate and the shingle the AmeIi-
 can boy of to-day manages to learn some- thing.-Harper's Bazar. l Blobson-What's good for insomia, Popin- 1 jay-Counting. Did you ever try counting
 thousand slowlyl BlobsSn-Lots of times. l but never made a success of it. Popinjey Why notf Blobson-Why, l always get | to slee before can 6nish-Burlin2ton Free | Press.
 l Harlem citizen (to builder)-What are you l going to put up therel Builder-We're just | beginning the finest row of flats ever built in l New York city. Citizen-Td like nice flat | in this neighborhood. Builder-Well, you
 stop on your way home from down town this
 evening and I'll show you through; but get | here as early possible, or they may be gone. l-Harper's Bazaar.
 What He Pulled Up.-"The other day I
 rowed down the river, said an old Texan 1 granger, ''snd saw some cowboys stalking of ! 6 claim in the richest bottom-land on my l place. They were armed with Winchester
 rifles, and,were desp'rately impudent." 'tDid l you pull up their stakesi" asked his neigh | bor. "Not muchl" was the reply. 'I pull
 ed up the stream. Life.
 Invalid (on railroad train)-Yes, am on g long journey. I am going to California for my health. Genial psssenger-Well, well. Glad met you. Pm bound for California,
 too. Let's keep together. My brother lives in California, and he wrote me there was a big chance for me out there, and I'm goin', you see, as fast as steam II take me. Invalid -Ehl Are you an orange grewers Genial
 passenge-No, I'm an undertaken Philadel phia Record.
 1 A hen may set 6 nest of eggs
 | And urge on her breeds birthday.
 But she can't set the hands on the face nf a watch l Becanse she ain't built that way. l -Jewslers Weekly.