The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1888-11-10
TOO BIG 4 HURRY.
Advice to City Peopie-The Craze for
Rapid Transit.

Advice to City Peopfe-The Craze for
Rapid Transit.
Rapid transit So that is what you
want? Well, you don't want anything
of the kind, taking want to mean need,
as properly it does. What you mean to
say is that you desire rapid transit.
Very well; you are a very foolish per-
son; that's all. You desire rapid transit
as children desire things not good for
them. Why do you pine for rapid tran
sit? What are you in hurry about? To
get to business? Then start ten minutes
earlier and take your time; you will do
your work better and more easily if you
take it up with unshaken nerves To
get home2 Home will he 'sthere" at
5:35 P. M. just as surely as at 5:25;
'sthe kids children, if you are too pro-
per a person to accept the classic slang
and their mother had rather see you
come home in a placid than in ruffied
state of mind What are you in hurry
about, anyhow?
For every beating pulse we tell
Leaves but the number less
So sung very pious and truthful YER
sifier of the last century. Why do you
desire to double the number of pulse beats
by the uncomfortable excitement of
rapid transit?" 1.-The numberless'' is
accomplished rapidly enough by the
slowest process. Soon shalt thou forget
all things; soon by all things shalt thou
be forgotten, said Marcus Aurelius some
1900 years ago. Why 10 you. desire to
quicken the trot of the procession toward
the inevitable chasm cf oblivion?
What you need-no matter what you
desire-is comfortable transit. Transit
that jars no nerve by rumbling cable,
jolting spring, clatter of hoof on stony
pavement, direful 9roan of laboring en-
gine, more direful shrek of steam whistle
or most direful jangle Of brass bells out
of tune. You don't want to be packed in
a surface travelling car of any sort; you
don't want your nerves to euiver with APP
prehension for the fate of the reckless
newsboy-too often newschild ex-
poses himself to more danger while
s'hopping cars for an hour than many
battle field disclosed in day. And
you don't want to be hoisteo into an
enlarged edition of a cash and parcels
basket, and whirled by steam or
electricity at an elevation too high
for safety, too low for comfort High
enough to insure disaster in case of acci-
dent, low enough to catch the smoke of
household chinneys. and the odors of
household cooking. Still less do you
want to be shot through the bowels of
the earth by atmospheric or other force.
AS has been said, you will explore the
subterranean regions soon enough. ''Jam
te premet nox, fabulBque manes," said
Horace. They were too wise to banker
after underground railways i'll his day.
But the more comfortable transit, how
are you going to get that? Easily, if
you have talented pair of legs; other
wise, with difficulty or not at all. And
even the most gifted legs will suffer dis
quiet at the bridges and crossings of the
most crowded streets Comfortable
transit is as yet afar off from you. Your
grandfather had it; your uncle who
lives Ill tie country has it. But your
grandfather was never in a hurry, and
your uncle never is. Therefore your
grandfather's nerves were and your un
| cle's are as of steel. The fierce jolt and
hideous rumbleof the thimble skein farm
wagon are and were to them luxurious
and musical. You have hurried your
nerves into tumble of sensitive mucus.
For you comfort means quiet. 1t will be
so-''only more so''-with your unfor-
tunate children. Science and humanity
will provide for them; they can hardly
be expected to help you, who are the
original sinful hurrier. The coming man
may cease from being in hurry, or
humanity may decree that every other
street be reserved for passenger traffic
and foot travel only; or some large and
strong tamable birds, graceful as the
swans of Loeda, may be discovered, upon
whose backs, or drawn by whom in
aerial cars, the tired and nervous may be
borne quietly, and quickly, too, to and
from business; or balloons may convey
people at salubrious heights through the
calm of air, OF chloroform may be adj
ministered to each street car passenger
| by the conductor in such quantities as to
render him OF her oblivious to the perils
and discomforts of travel. This latter
experiment might well be essayed under
the existing condition Of street transit,
which is neither comfortable nor rapid. =
| Chicago Inter Ocean.