The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1888-11-17
OLD SEATON'S. PLANS.
Excellent Reasons Why He Con-
cluded to Alter Them.

"Matters have reached certain pint and
C'lum must hear to reason"
So said old Luke Seaton to his wife one
evening in the autumn of the year.
"lf he were a old man thered be some ex
cuse for the fuss she's a-makin'; but he's
young and well-favored and owns a quarter
section o. good land, mostly paid for by his
own hard TIL Any gearl ort to think her.
self lucky; an C'lum must hear to reason.
Look inter the almanac mother, and see
when the moon changes. The pigs Just
right; fat enough m not too fat: but we
mustn't slorter in the decrease, kase WHY.
the meat'll shrink in fryin'. First quarter
comes next Tuesday, Well, that's as good
day as any for pig g-killin', and better meat
than fresh ribs and tenderlines few folks
'u'd crave, even for weddin' supper. Pig
slortcred and put up on Tuesday, bakin'
done on Wednesday, and wcddin' on Thurs
day-thats the layin'-out Call C'lum"
Mrs. Seaton, the meek spirited Lady Cap
uiet of this story, obcyed, and presently Co
lumbig, her daughter, entered. She was
tall, handsome country girl, with face
bright and sincere. When her fathers
''layin' '-out' was repeated to her, she shook
her head, and said with slow scorn:
wonder that you should suppose you
could make me do it,"
The old man ragged and raved He abused
his daughter, and abused her mother for not
having taught her flial obedience, and
ended by abusing certain young man
named Ralph Bryan, who had made love to
Columbia, and who Columbia favored.
"The good-fer-nothing. weakly drug store
clerk, 'thout n dollars wuth o. land or live
stock IN the worldr'
''He has that that's better than land or
stock,n said Columbia; "he has brains and Il
good heart"
At this her father fairly danced about in
his angry excitement.
"You take up fer him, do We! Well, I've
settled all that. He's he'd his orders, and
you've he'd yourn He keeps off'E misplace,
or sure as my dog Bulbs got teeth in his
head, they gifts sot in his scrawny shanks
Brains and a good heart To think of a fel-
Ter with nothin' in the world but brains an
good heart, havin' the base fortytood to
ask man o. my means fer his only darter!"
Then, we grieve to say, Columbia forgot
the fifth commandment and spoke words to
her parents dishonor.
"Ralph Bryan is above us all. He con-
descended when he came TO ask for his wife
the daughter of man proud of his ignor-
ance; man who could never be persuaded
to learn to read and write.n
"Ye sassy iade!" growled the old farmer,
savagely. "Insutin yer own father, who
more'n half deserves 1t for sparin' ye from
the work TO go to school, 'stid o. maxim We
hoe corn summers and shell the same wig
ters! But all the same, he's he'd his orders,
and you've he'd yourn. Sure as your name
is Columby Ann Seaton, so sure you'll be
married to William Haywood next Thurs
day. Figger out what you want from town
for the supper fixin's, and I'll git the same
to-morrer; and II ye behave as a good girl
ort. I'll do by ye, in the matter o. outsettin'
in a way that'll surprise ye.'
''Pll never marry Bill Haywood" said Co
lumbia, firmly. "Why, he has scarcely asked
me! have never spoken hundred words
with the man in my life"
"Well, yell hev chance to speak several
hundred with him before We die of old age.
And If he hasn't asked You, he's asked me,
which amounts to good deal more in this
case Dye hear that! Nobody can't say
word ag'in him. and, If it want for the wild
der Lockery, and her gamc-makin', dam
agn' tongue, the gearls 'ud be crowdin'
each other off'n the floor fer a chance to
stand up with him."
The widow Lockery, in her own peculiar
scro-comic style, did give William Haywood
rather grotesque setting forth, somewhat
as follows:
''I'd heerd as how Billy was ruther too
avaricious for young man, neglectin' his
self and keepin' mean, oudacious kind of
OIL bachelors hall, all on account of sayin'-
ness. But said twas to his credit to be
savin'. It's creditable to git property, and
creditable to save it, in all reasonable and
becomin' ways; but there's a kind of CON
omy that's both unreasonable and unbecom-
in. Well, one day Lavynie's little boy ken
and told me that viii Haywood wanted some
o. my cut-short beans to plant with his corn; ;
80, when he was givin' his corn the first
plowin', took little poke o. them beans
and started cross lots to the field knew he
was workiu' in. kern close up to him afore
he saw me, and had a chance to look the
crittcr over; and tell you he was a sight!
Not that he's such a humly wretch. He's
tall and we'll put up, with fairlsh face, only
his eyes have u narrer, borin' sort 20 squint.
But the way he was dressed! Hickory
shirt-that's all right. Cowhide boots-all
right, too. But he he'd on gulluses made
out'n II old pair o. buggy reins, and NANCY
old plug hat that was his father's-the nap
peeled on in places. And his trousers-they
was the worst! l hardly know how 70
tell you about them; he was wearn' them
onmentionables in such an. onmentionable
way You see they he'd begun TO show
signs OF givin' out, and to make 'em last
longer he had actually reversed 'em-put
'eu on front backwards and back front
wards. Sure's you live, the bulges his knees
hef made were, at the back OF his legsl Well
stood there! Presently went on to tell