The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-07-06
From the Chicago Herald.

The Omu1srteut
From the Chicago Herald.
"Now, that name" said the hotel clerk,
running his diamond-hilted finger down
the register and pausing at the name OF
Gurlproat, "that name is fraud. That
man is travelling incog., and there is some
thing crooked about him.
"Why do l think so? Why, almost
know tin fact, do know it intuitively.
1t is my business to be familiar with names,
and the derivation OF them. Now, there is
no such name as Gurlproat. 1t is ma
chine name, manufactured for an emer-
gency, something like the characters III
Dickens novels--the Neneerings, PEN
snaps, Weggs, Dorrits, Jaggers, Nicklebys
and Chuzzlewits. | am obliged, you
know, to be sharp in my business. | tell
you, he is a fly fakir from Flytown. He
is aqueer one, and you can bet high on
that.
"Now, there is man," continued the
hotel clerk, pointing TO another square
toed specimen of caligraphy; that man
Jones, there, A. q. Jones, he's all o. X.
There is no subterfuge about him. lie
comes in and planks down his gripsack,
deposits roll OF bills in the safe, calls for
stylus, indorses the register, and there
you have it straight and tlat-footed. A.
o. Jones, -, 900 in his roll in the safe. He
is man who will do to tie up to. We
have to be good judges OF human nature
in this business, tell you, and are obliged
TO be tcetotally and strictly sharp. But
Jones is solid with this house He has
been here week now, and ! have adj
vanced him $500 or 5000 on his roll.
Al. Ill
are you?' inquired the reporter, carelessly.
''Surp! Why, it is an express package,
sealed, and the amount marked on the
corner. Guests often leave them with us
for security"
81 should want to know IL was all right
before loaned money on it, pursued the
reporter
That's where YOU would fool yourself.
That's where YOU would insult guests and
drive trade away. But'-the sharp clerk
spoke this little neasily-'just TO show
you what square man Jones is, I'll
send up this bill, and the clerk pro-
cecded TO sound the loud timbrel which
summoned n bell boy.
Here run up to 5S with this" said the
clerk.
While the bell boy was on this mission
the suspicious Gurlproat came up to the
office 10 settle his bill.
That's he-Gurlproat," said the clerk,
forming the words with his mouth, with.
out ultering sound, ''SS,25--two days
and half"
"IIey?" says the despised Gurlproat.
1.-TWO DAYS and ahalf-eight and quar-
ter" answered the clerk, winking at the
reporter
Eight dollars"
Eight"
"And quarter"
GAN right correct" and Mr.. Gurlproa'
laid down a $40 bill. The sharp clerk
spent five minutes examining and testing
the same. While doing so the suspected
guest observed:
III Col. James Gurlproat OF Mont
gOmcry, Ala, calls for me, please tell hin
have gone TO Washington
The hotel clerk looked suddenly mp
aid his face was like circus poster gildeC
BY the rays Of sunset
care You Congressman Gurlproat, o
Alabama he inquired
"llcy?"
"Arc You Congressman Gurlproat, o
Aabama?'
vi "Nc, | am his brother ! am Judg
- 9urlpruat, formerly Of the suprcm
bench"
lie had his change, and in another in
slant the porter was obsequiousIy cscortin
him out 10 n carriage.
"Whv," exclaimed the clerk. ait
singular happened 90 forget that Curl
proat family OF Montgomery. IL just beat
all. Funny, isn't it, when YOU miss
mans name"
The bell boy returned at this intcrest!n
juncturc OF the proceedings with the start
ling information that 4. q. Jones ha
skipped. bag and baggage. hook, line an
sinker, foot, horse aud Dragons. tn
clerk turned white and his finger shoe
like splinter on n rail in the wind. rs h
suddenly went down into the safe aite
the express package. lie fshcd il ~
tore OF the end, and proceeded 10 shak
out-a generous wad 81 newspaper olil
pings, some Of It gems Of poetry, the ba
ance choice extracts from the humorOu
papers and medical reading notices.
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