The Pickens sentinel. [volume] (Pickens, S.C.) 1871-1903, 1888-03-15
BRIC-A-BRAC.
THEY COULDN'T TRADE.

f... THEY COULDN'T TRADE.
l met maid on yon hillside, s.
And she was fair to see; az
"Give me kiss, fair maid" cried;
"Give me gift" said she.
"a gift within purse have,
The purse Is in pack;
The pack in keeping lieth safe
On my good chargers back.
"Ard my good charger cometh not
While on the hill roam;
He lieth in his stall, wot-
My charger is at home"
"And yet thou DIST have a kiss, good sir;
My lips would give it thee,
But they are locked full fast, good sir
My mother has the key.
"And my good mother is not hero,
While on the hill l roam
just as your trusty stccd, good sir
My mother is at home"
A clean shirt IS not bad bosom friend
"Put up and shut up"-The stoves and
doors.
A sweeping statomcnt-That ancient one
about the new broom.
The critics who expect warmth and color
In instrumental music should study the
steam whistle.
a philosopher is man who may think
great deal, but who never seems to do
much
''This is a cold, backward spring" said
the man whose feet had Just shot from
under linn on a slippery sidewalk.
Some thOught!csSly overload the horse,
and then wonder when the education thus
given dcvclopcS an obstinate, balky animal.
The number of women who care to vote
is about equal to the number of men who
like to put the baby to sleep.
"Do you love mc?' "With all my soul,
| swear 1t. MAY, do not swear. Speak
it into the phonograph, and that will be
enough"
There is question about the validity of
a marriage by telephone but we should
think any lcvcl-hcadcd Judge would decide
that ii is "sound" proposal.
How to make a fortune as a journalist
20 INTO some other business and exercise
your journalistic talent by telling people
PriPalcly now a newspaper out to be run.
There arc in the Sunday-shools of the
Christian world 16, An $50 scholars, ,0j2,
i01 i01 teachers, making grand total of 49,
400, 1871
lou sec, the trouble with Success" that
is 100 dearly bought is that you have rot
TO go on assocating with yourself after YOU
have attained il.
There is another fashionable institution
IliaI should DC sat on, said the lecturer on
hygiene. and that Is the hustle" And
every lady IN the audience gave vent to an
audible litter
Married men are preferred as officers on
lhc pollcc force. The authorities want
men VINO have their couragcd tried and
proved.
II the sudden changes in the weather af.
lCct You diSagrecably, it is no less lln-
peasant ior your animals to endure Make
them as comfortable rs possible.
Oysters do not claim to be the lords of
creation, and yet they are probably served
III more ways and by more people than any
other living creature
Dung writer's in preparing their manu-
Srripl should leave plenty of space between
the lines. The world would not suffer
mnch II many Of them should make it all
space.
Tobacco stems are now being used in
making paper; on the principle, we suppose
That turn about is fair play, all the straw
and oId rags having been utilized long ago
III the manufacture of cigarettes.
a man who wanted to be facctiOus with
the mllkman us he was measuring out his
morning portion said, "Do You charge
extra for the watcr?" "No," replied the
hillAmin; 'thc water is thrown in"
WiGc-Now this is the third time I've
caught you i'll the kitchen talking to the
cook lluSband-Ycs. II believe it is,
Wiic--W Wen, the very next time catch
y"n 'aiking to the cook I'll discharge her
and do the COOkiur myself,
Ibid YOU enjoy the opera last night,
inquired his wife. Not much" he nm,
sWcrcd: Il was lonesome, and was sorry 7
was detained at the Office so late that I
hadE time to come for you This going
alone to the theatre isn't what it's cracked
up to be, my dear" mo, l suppose not, -
returned the lady, thoughtfully. "Still
You must have been very comfortable. =
She added, rs the two ticket stubs found
IN your vest pocket gave you the advantage
OF more than one seat"
WHAT LACK WE YET?
When Washington was president
AS cold as amy iciclc,
lie never on railroad went,
And never rode bicycle.
lie read by no electric. lamp,
Nor heard about the Yellowstone:
lie never licked postagc,stamp,
And never saw Il telephone.
Ills trousers ended at his knees;
By wire he could not words dispatch;
lie hllrd his lamp with whalcoil grease,
ana never had match to scratch.
But in these days it's come to pass,
All work is with such dashine uonc,
we've all these things-but then, alas!
We seem to have no Washington.
PIANOS AND OnEANS