Morning journal and courier., 1888-09-12
MAXIMUM.

A Harlem man, Mumm by name, has christened his twins Minnie and Maximilian. As an example of minimum and maximum this cannot be beaten.-Boston Post.
 When the hired man sits patiently down every iften minutes in the day to rest, it re- freshes him, no doubt, but it makes his em- ployer very tired.-Somerville Journal.
 Tardy Ablutions-Countryman (to waiter) -s'What's that thing, mister." Waiter sFinger bowl, sir, for washing the fingers" Countryman-s'Too late, my friend, I'm all through. ."-The Epoch.
 ssWhat is a catboatf' consistently and re- peatedly inquired 8 little girl of her father at the supper table last night, interrupting his conversation with another person. ssIt's a boat with 6 yawl to it." rather grossly re- sponded the father.-Lowen Courier.
 It isn't always the handsomest pocket book that has the most money in it. The man who carries careless wad in his right hand vest pocket is generally the man who is able to make loan--and the man who usually has too much sense to do it, too.- Somerville Journal.
 Yes, John Henry, the time has arrived when stLines to Autumn" should be sent in to the newspapers, and the time for kindiing fires is approaching. All these things are providentially arranged. It is not worth while to send your lines to offices that use steam heat.-New York Dispatch.
 American-How is business in England now, MT. Jokelyi
 MT. Jokely-Very depressed, indeed. My business is particularly dull.
 American-Indesd! By the way, what line are you int
 MT. Jokely-I am an editor of London Punch.-Lowell Courier.
 Another Wrong to be Righted-Employe (to spokesman of deputation)-"S you want your pay raised, do you' Don't you think that is rather cool, just after have given you the benefit of the Saturday half-holi- cause of it. You don't suppose we can get along with the same wages when we have helf. holiday every week.
 The Point of View-The long, sweltering June day was drawing to 6 close. Madam" said the tramp, f'I have eaten nothing for two days and am nearly starved. Can you give me 8 morselp "Mercy sakes, mani" was the sympathstic response" done tais about eating. It's too hot to eat" And with 8 sad, deep sign the tramp turned away. murmuring as he did so, "This is 8 cold world VIC live in."-Harper's Bazar.
 A distinguished caller.-We had 8 call the other day from Major George Devine, a late arrival from the East, who is here to look af- ter his mining interests. The major had on the first real billed shirt we have seen in six months. His boots were also blaoked. He sat for two hours and never asked us far 8 chew of tobacco, drink of whisky, or free puff. He didn't have 8 gun strapped to his back, and he didn't use cuss words. We were lonely when the major went away. Westward the star of empire may take it's way, and we cayotes out here may get up and howl over the way we rush business, but when an eastern man drops in here with a clean neck, shaved face and store clothes, there's never a one of us who isn't ashamed of his ornery self.-Arizona Kicker.
 Man never is but always to be, blest,''
 We indorse without hesitation;
 The time man is most in need of rest Is the day after his vacation.
 New York Journal.