davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29

to show respect toward the dead, and
his priests We're the arrangers of funer-
ais: The chief of the religious college
of Jupiter Cernunos in the days of Mar
Gus Aurelius, obtained the PRONUNCIATION
of an edict, in the name of the god, by
which funeral rites were carefully or
dained, and all citizens obliged to take
part in them, and even help to pay the
expenses in the case of the burial of the
poor.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29

AGRICULTURAL education is receiving
no small attention i'll India, the English
government having recently placed the
College of Agriculture at Downtown
under its patronage and decreed that its
diplomas should be considered as of
equal value with those of the Royal
Agricultural College at Cirencester,
England.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29

The number of babies who have been
named after either President Cleveland
or his wife is enormous. No admins
tration in our history, according to a
contemporary, has had so potent an in
fuence on the infant industry of baby
naming as that which now gives way to
the Harrisonian regime.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29

II is estimated that the next census
may show that we have a population of
nearly 70,000,000. This great increase
is in large measure due to immigration.
Between 1870 and 1880 immigration
was comparatively light From 1880 to
1888 no less than 4, ,637, ,252 persons have
come to this country. At the same ratio
the total immigration for the decade
will probably reach 5,750,000. The
natural increase should be relatively as
great as in the last decade, and this will
bring the total increase close upon 90
100000, and give the United States
population of 10000, 900.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29

SOME astonishing facts about the adul-
teration of food products have been
brought out by the Congressional COM
mittee that is Investigating it, and other
testimony on the subject was taken last
winter by the House Committee on Ag-
riculture. It appears that some espe-
cially bad work of the kind is being
done by st. Louis houses, and the facts
about it will be presented to Congrt SIS
next session. In the meantime, the
question has been taken up by the Ma
tional Board of Trade at its meeting in
Chicago, and some of the evidence pre-
sented is very repulsive, particularly
that in regard to the adulteration of
lard. After debate, the board adopted
a resolution in favor of the bill that was
introduced at last session of Congress,
providing for the establishment of a
"Pure Food Division" of the Depart
ment of Agriculture, in order to put
stop to adultaration by the general in
spection of food products in the facto-
ries where they are prepared. There
is no doubt among scientific men that
some of the authorizations recently
brought to light by the Congressional
committee and the National Board of
trade are highly detrimental to health.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29

AT Central City, Col, the other day,
retort containing $4,000 in gold was
placed in bank for safe keeping. The
gold was all produced in single day by
one mine. The amount is the greatest
ever taken from any mine in the same
length of time,
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29

LESS than fifty years ago there was
not Photographic camera in the world;
to day there are fifteen thousand photo
graphic establishments, to say nothing
of the thousands of amateur outfits, in
the United States.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29

In memory of the Emperor Williams
recent visit to Austria, Francis Joseph
has invested $25, 200 in gaudy uniforms
and sent them with his compliments to
the Prussian Hussar Regiment, of which
he has been made the Colonel.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29

THE foreigner in Paris is always
struck by the outward marks of respect
shown by the Parisians to the dead.
When hearse passes it is the custom to
salute the corpse by taking off ones hat.
So, too, on passing before house door
where corpse is exposed in ''chapelle
This custom dates back to the time of
the old Gapls, who worshipped god
whom the Roman conquerOrs admitted
to their Olympus under the name of Ju-
piter Ccrnunos. This god required men
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
NOTES AND COMMENTS.

RAILROAD men in the West are max
ing determined effort to do away with
the deadly car stove. The movement
should extend to every section of this
country.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29

LATEST estimates place the wheat crop
of France at 273,000,000 commercial
bushels, with a reserve of wheat and
flour from last years crop equivalent to
5000, 900 bushels.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29

"Can dogs find their way home from
a long distanceI" asked paper. It's
according to the dog. If it's one you
want to get rid of, he can find his way
back from California; if it's good one,
he's apt to get lost if he goes around the
corner.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
ONE LITTLE ERRAND.

"Now, my DEAR" said husband, i'm
patiently pulling on his coat. 81 want
to get down town right away. If you
have anything further to say or for me
to do, you'll have to make haste"
Come to think of it john, said his
wife II have something more for you to
do"
''Well ~
81 want you to leave the marble clock
ut the jewelers., two blocks down the
street, and b. sure and call for it on
your way home. .'-N6W York Sun.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
SENT HIS NAME.

Editor, writing to eminent literary
man ''I If you will send us story-say
1,500 to 1900 words-we will pay YOU
$500. You understand that this is
1926 for the use of your name and S.
for the story-our usual rates.
Literary Man I" regret to say that
have no time or inclination to write
the story, but I enclose my name, which
you may use, and in return send me
check for 1926. "-BurJjagton Free Press.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
NOT HIS FAULT.

"Robert," said the father sternIy,
"don't ever let me hear of your going to
the closet again for cake"
cit wasn't my fault.
"Not your fault?"
"No, if ma hadn't told you, you
wouldn't have heard of it.'-Utica
Observer.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29

SARAH JANE McIhRoY, a seventeen
year-old girl, of Kingston, Ontario, saw
two toughs assauIting a citizen a month
ago. Instead of fainting she laid her
parcel on the sidewalk, screamed mur-
der, grabbed one Of the assailants by the
neck and hurled him aside, and gave
the victim an opportunity to handle his
other foe. When she modestly told her
tale in court she was given round after
round of applause.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
WHAT HE PULLED UP.

'"The other day I rowed down the
river, said an old Texas granger, ''and
saw some cowboys stalking off a claim
in the richest bottom-land on my place.
they were armed with Winchester rifles
and were desperately impudent.'
''Did you pull up their stakes2" asked
his neighbor.
"Not much, was the reply, 81 pulled
up the stream. ."-LJs.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
OCCASION FOR ALARM.

''Men, said the captain of the steamer
to the frightened passengers huddling
about him, sit is true we are not gaining
on the leak, but we are only fifty miles
from land, and, if necessary, we can
throw overheard 1000 tons of freight to
tighten the ship. There is no occasion
for alarm. We have several hundred
casks of rum in the hold that we can
-"
"No occasion for alarm!" exclaimed
tall Kentuckyan, turning pale with ap-
prehenison. ''Cnptlin, do you intend
to throw that rum overheard o. Chicago
IIi5UHc.
EPICUREAN HOST.
BY the way, how do you like this
cheese?
Why. it's. not l,af bad
i~l'iStlresHtl Ii
then III have 1t put away until inter
Christmas
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
INDICATIONS OF A SEVERE WINTER,

The indications are that the coming
winter is going to be one OF Arctic
severity. A correspondent writes that
the muskrats in his ne1ghborhood have
put storm doors on their houses and de-
posted four tons of stove coal in the
cellar. And the beavers are more re-
liable weather prophets than either De
Voc or Wiggins. .-N0rrist0wn Herald,
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
EASILY KEPT ACCOUNT OF.

The husband stood d. the door, hat in
hand, aud spoke with a tinge of impa-
tience in his tone.
81 am waiting, Maria" he SAID ''for
my customary good-by kiss
81 kissed you only moment ngo,
John" replied his wife.
"Why, SO you did, my love-, said
John, putting on his hat, $50 you did. !"
eff I smoked as nasty pipe as you
do" said Maria, "you would have no
difficulty in remembering my kisses. !"
-CHicQqO Tribune.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
Uncle BIight's Thanksgiving.

rs like asking q man
to find n needle in a
hay-mow," said Mr..
Sepple, the jeweler,
rs he looked up at
Colonel Gran er with
the odd, near sighted
look that jewellers
have after they have
poured over the tiny
N e C h ami S m of
watches by the hour.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
TIE United States Consul at Canton.

HE United States CONSUL at canton,
China, reports to the Department of
State that while Europe and America
usually get about 81 900 bales of raw
silk per annum from Canton, they will
not be able to secure more than 200
bales this season by reason of the disas-
trous floods, which inflicted serious in
jury on the silk districts of Kuanytung
loss to this district will exceed So, 300.
600 United States currency.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
WORSE YET

John, you are not listening to
word am saying
=" Why, my dear, an, all ears"
=" know you are, and that makes it
oil the more provoking"
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29

Social Anomaly-The fact that people who
"get on" should be ''wcl off,
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
SIMILARITY OF BEAR STORIES.
Maine Hunter.-I'Il tell yeou bout q

1Hts .IIO lIUHIGI. IT IOII 6UI UOUJ q
bear +.
Experienced Visitor. Il know all
about it. The bear had club and at
tackled you, and after using up all your
ammunition, you finally drew your
pocket-knife and killed the brute.
Maine Hunter. now, eff that
amt jest the way it happened who told
yeou2
Experienced Visitor.-No one; but
I've heard about $50 bear stories since
I've been here, and in every blessed
case the hero used up all his ammuni-
ton and finally killed the bear with
pocketknife. The mystery to me is
why you fellows don't start in with the
pocketknife tirst,-Puck.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
HE DIDN'T WANT ANY STOCK,

''Uncle John, don't you think you'd
like to buy some stock in our street rail
way?"
'No, Tommy; I've alters had the best
stock on my farm, an I reckon I don't
want ter bring any broken-down street.
car hosses On ther place ."-Bagar.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
THE FRUITS OF SUCCESS.

First Baseball Player-Well, old man,
I've taken villa at Nice for the winter.
viii you come over and see me?
Second Baseball Player-Thanks
awfully, me boy, but I'm going to try
to buy seat in the United States
Senate, SO I'll be too busy to get away.
Remember me kindly to the swells.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
SPOILING THE SALE.

Prim Spinster-Well, if you say, Mr.,
Featherwing, that the parrot has been
we'll brought up and is perfectly strong,
l think I may as we'll take him.
Parrot (who knows life and is some
what aghast at his future prospects)-I
say, boss, amt it about time l took my
medicine?
And then he coughed till the tears ran
down his face.-N. Y. Sun.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
A FORTUNATE ACCIDENT.

Mistress (after heavy crash in the
kitchen below)-Graeious, Bridget, L
hope you havn't broken that new vase I
brought home to day.
Bridget-No, Mem; it's one O. the
immin meringe pies that yes was abakin'
this afternoon.-Ihe EpOch.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
HE WOULD DYE FOR HER.

''I'd rather die o thousand deaths than
have you refuse my Offer" said the aged
suitor as he knelt before fair young
damsel.
81 see you have already begun to
dye" said the heartless creature, land
you daubed lot of it on your ears, too.
[ like gray hair better than blue-black,
any day"
He fled in terror. r.-DanyiUe Breeze.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29

Mrs. Blood Ito the Colonel, who has
returned from fighting dueD-Oh,
Colonel, you look distressed; is it pos
sible that you have injured your antago-
mist?
Colonel Blood-A sight worse, my
dear. killed valuable mule in an
adjoining lot, and s'pose I'll have to
pay for him. -1euGs SJtjngs.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
THE JOKERS' BUDGE
HUMOROUS YARNS FOUND IN
OUR EXCHANGES.
In High Circles Feeling BIue-Big
Fruits of Success-Similarity of
Bear Stories, etc, etc.
EVIDENTLY A MISUNDERSTANDING.

EVIDENTLY A MISUNDERSTANDING.
Painter (who is looking for work and has
pestered Mrs. Hobson beyond endur-
ance)-That fence, madam, needs coat
of paint very badly.
Mrs. Hopson Gmpatiently to servanD
Show this man the front door at once,
James.
Painter All, this looks like business.
I'll paint that door for you, madam, in
good shape for $4.-IH6 Epoch.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29

Young wife: Haven't I heard you
say, james, that you are fond of ham +"
Young husband "Yes; ham and
eggs"
Young wife 'Well, if you will stop
at the market and order about two
pound of ham and eggs, we'll have it for
dinner.'-JU9ge.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-11-29
PoNsoNBY's PROSPECTS.

Mr.. Dolliver--So you want to marry
my daughter? Have you any means of
existence2
Mr.. Ponsonby-At present, none, but
have very brilliant prospects.
Mr.. Dolliver-I dare say; but suppose
l don't die for good many years, what's
going to become of you then ?-Drake's
-UdgUzjne.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-04-14

himself n gallant soldier and is repre-
scented az being in other respects a splen-
did man. II it be true that the young
people love each other it is natural that
the Empress, both az Empress and rs
mother should favor the marriage, Her
own married lie and that Of her mother
Queen N,oroulA Of England furnish
bright examples of the blessing OF gen
uinc affection in the marriage relation.
Yet there is every reason 90 believe that
the Emprcss's Judgment is MS sound as
her convictions ore strong Her acts as
we'll as her public Utterances, say tie
juuhors what they may, show that
she has the interest of Germany
Ut heart. and holds her duty, rs she seas
il. 20 Germany above ali other consii-
,m'ions. A woman OF her mould cen
not fail 10 recognize aba. Whatever may
le the grounds OF BI,uAEcE's opposi-
ton to the match he is honest in That OPP
position. She cannot fail 10 appreciate
TIA, If be did not speak his oPpos'-
ton and give his reasons for II be
woald be unworthy OF the confidence
that the Emperor and the German peo-
PIE repose in him as Chancellor Of the
empire. Equally tue is it thata man
of .I.u,U.Na mould canuo. fail to ap-
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-04-14

a SUGGESTION. "a Voter" having
said in the Atote that should any one re
fuse or neglect to vote for the full num-
Der OF aldermen, councilmcn, or Justices
Al the Democratic primary, april 18th,
his vote for other candidates for other
Offices would not be counted, Another
Voter " comments as follows:
This Is a very important matter.
Such ruling Is unjust, uuwise. irnpolitic,
and undemocrstic, and should be
changed at once, otherwise a great many
Democrats who believe in the free exer-
else Of their right to vote their choice
VIII stay out Of the primary"
The reason Of the rule is that voting
ought 10 be fair-in other words, that
few hundred voters shall not vote for
one candidate only out Of half dozen
running for the same Office and 80 elect
HIM by a minority vote. But where
there Is only one person 10 be elected -
an Office. no matter how many run, the
rule cannot apply. The reason for it
has ceased " ezist. and the rule ought
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-04-14

The Cnn.c ton Nsus and Corier,
strongly aat-protectionIs;, Las the fol
lowing excellent article:
I1p5LIIcASD WEoS1.--The very small
Democrat minority wt0arc responsible
FOR tlccNi-tug dead lock III the housc of
Representatives occupy the peculiarly
unfortunate position Of JcopardZlng the
interests az their party, without having
q reasonable excuse i0r their conduct GA
the score al either policy or principle.
That It was bad policy for the Demo.
cratic party TO organize the deadlock in
the first instance. and - maintain 1t SD
long. As tOIerablv clear 10 every oue-eX-
ccIt the tluustcTs a. t seems. Tie
failure OF important Legislation caused
by the action of sn insignificant muori-
" is charged to the account ot the Dem
ocratic House aud Democratic party as
whole. livery days delay j. t. the
manifest advantage Of the Republicans.
and their satisfaction IN view Of the
plight of .heir antagonists should alone
oe sufficient to bring the most obstinate
Democrat TO his senses.
On grounds Of principle the iilibusters
seem TO be no less at "a disadvantage.
There can be no very serious doubt Of
the right and power Of Congress to It.
fund the direct taxes. and under all the
they should be refunded.
10 is nothing to the purpose TO object
that the money Will be distributed iu
only a part of the country. 1t viii be
distributed rs it was collected, and It's
unequal collection is the very strongest
reason for its redistribution now, since it
has not been returned before.
The only proper question is as 10 the .
Justice of the claim OF the States which
paid the direct tax to have the proceeds I.
refunded t. them, and whether there is I.
money in the Treasury to meet that T
claim. The claim is just one and .
should be paid, and the Democratic f
party cannot afford 10 go on record .
against the payment. The true repre-
soutatlves OF a party, an overwhelming .
majority Of the Democratic members in
the House. are in favor Of passing the .
bill which orders the tax % be refunded. .
ItIsoUacut that the minority are wholly .
IN the wrong and are forcing their party .
into false position. They cannot posi-.
bly, hope TO have their way IN the end. .
and they should not be allowed to have
Il low, If there IS any means of over .
coming their blind aud logged opposi-
ton.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-04-14

The obstrnctionists in the House Of
Representatives. have come 90 their senses
at Last and consented TO an arrangement
concerning the disposal OF the dirrct-tax
bill which Will permit business to 60 on
in is regular order More than week
of valuable time has been foolshly
wasted TO prevent. not the passage but
the consideration Of ameasure the justice
Of which no one that we have heard OF
disputes Even were the bill bad
measure filibustering tactics would be Of
doubtful morality or eHpediency, Tor
sooner or later it must come to an issue,
10 matter how many parliamentary sub
torfuges are rcsorted 10 for the purpose
Of delaying yote.-PctersJury HIde-c-
AppcW.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-04-14

Conflicting reports continue TO be re
ceived from Bel nconcerniug the alleged
"crisis growing out Of the proposed
marriage Of Prince ALEXANDER Of Bat
tenburg with Princess NIcromA. &c
coIding 10 our kilograms the mar
mage has been of and on dozen
times during tho last ten days. As
We have heretofore said, il is probable
that when the truth * known it viii be
found that the tempest can be put into
teapot We do lot question that
there has been some difference o. opinion
between BISMARCK and the Empress
rs TO the ACCESSIBILITY Of the match,
Int the chances aro that the extent Of
that difference has been very much ex-
aggerated. Certain it is that even if the
disagreement has been serious very little
disposition has developed Itself 10
accord the Chancellor and the
Empress the credit they deserve for
common sense, patriotism, and desire 10
do what is night. One would suppose
from reading the average telegram re-
garding the matter that the whole trou.
bic wss quarrel between u stubborn
and dictatonsl old man and a seli.wilIed
and imperious woman, and that each
was determined to triumph at any cost
the sense that he has an iron will, but
no man can point 10 q single instance in
bis career where he Was not actuated in
the manifestation Of those traits by what
he conceived 10 be his duty 10
Germany and tho House Of Hohen- /
zollern. The Empress is no doubt /
: woman Of strong convictions. /
OF Battenbere has proved |
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-04-14
THE RICHMOND DISPATCH,
Icy - DhpArCR CONPANX

Tn.nAlIY DISPATCH "a delivered % snb-
,rrlbsrs =, YlrTrEN CgNrs per week, payable 20
a. carrier weekly Mailed a. s. por annum,
,sfor six months si.5O for three months. So
for ore month.
Tho STNI-WTEKiY DISPATCH at g. per
snuuru, or 81 for siN MONTE.
The WEEKLY DISPATCH atSi per arnum.
TleSUNDAY pIspATCHa,$ per aunuo,
-. for six months
Subscriptions On an cases payable IN advance.
srG no paper continued after ttc expiration q
The time paid for send postotco moncy-
order. cheek. or registered lctor CuTony
seui by mail viii he at She risE 81 tie sendcr
Subscribers WISHING Ne,r postoflce changed
must give ;he'r old o. vou as Mcir DoF Ioet-
sE4se. sample copies i.co
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-04-14

Those Democratic representatives who
have helped 10 block the business of
the House for the last week or ten days
have assumed heavy responsibility.
They say the bill they oppose Cor re-
turning the direct war tax to the States
is bad and unconstitutional. If so. II
Woul surely meet the veto OF tie Presi
dent and thus time precious to the
country and the Democratic party be
saved. Charlottesville ChrOnicic.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-04-14

Tire Alexandria Gq-Dte insists that
the delegates 10 be sent toour state Con
veutiou should all he ia favor OF tariff
reform That plperwant- T. kick Enn-
dali out Of tie party. 1t cant be done !;
th.t's a.l.
Wc,r1st that the delegates TO he sent
by Danvi.le add tAe great county Of
pi,t-v.vania viii have sense enough not
20 divide upon the t.l.1 question:
UuuHe HcIHcr.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-04-14

General Booth. the Salvation-Army
leader, is one OF the sharpest business
men in England and has accumulated
large fortune. Tickets OF admission to
his daughters wedding to Mr. Fakeer
Tucker were sold at s. apiece, and hun
dreds were purchased by the austocracy
OF London.