The Washington critic., 1888-01-21
THE JUVENILE JOKER.
Something TO Amuse the Little Girls
and Rows

-
and Boys.
Tariff Reform: Little Clifton went to
bed one night with new flannel night
Mamma he cried, II don't like the
sheep on this night-gown."-[ Boston
Globe.
A PROGRESSIVE sPELLER.
He knew a thing or two besides or
biography: Minister-So you go to school,
do you, Bobby2 Bobby-Yes, sir. Min
ster-Let me hear you spell kitten.
Bobby-rm getting too big boy to spell
kitten; try me on cat. New York Sun.
METEOROLOGICAL.
A very small boy, who had hitherto
only seen his little baby cousin crawling
about the floor, on entering her home very
Unexpectedly found her moving around
on her feet "Oh, lnothern he exclaimed,
shes walking on her hind legs. ."-[New
York World
ONE WAY OUT.
A pointer on the pit question A little
Cass-avenue girl came home from church
greatly troubled over the bottomless pit.
After q while she cheered up, saying: ~
didn't think of ii before, but if the bottom
of the pit is out could get out on the
other side, couldn't I"-[Detroit Tri-
bune.
ONLY PLAIN CAKE.
Mamma" said little Willie, after re-
turning from dinner to which he had
been invited, II allus kinder thought that
cake was just cake; but see there's diff
ference in it, Aunt Susan's cake is cake
am pie an puddin' an peaches an ice
cream an everything good, together, but
10 Ifnk NlNtaft Hps.
bune.
ALL THE DIFFERENCE.
Little Tommy Ray quarreled with his
sister and would not kiss and be friends.
His aunt said .oh. don't you remember
what papa read at family prayers this
morning, that we were to forgive seventy
times seven "
'rYes," replied Tommy, "but tickerly
noticed it was to your brother, not sister. '
buffalo Courier
STANDING ARMY.
"What is the standing army of the
United States?" asked the teacher.
at are the men" replied the smart bad
boy, who only came in last term, "who
hang on to the straps in the. street cars. I"
And the principal sat up that night I'M
til the moon went down trying to decide
minus and lick him, or ten, plus and give
him o toy pistol.-[Burdette.
SICK WEEK IN THE FAMILY.
Two boys who hadn't seen each other
for u long time met in the street one jan
uary morning.
Hey, hello, is that YOU Bob? What
kind Of Il Christmas did you haye?" said
one.
"Splendid, You bet " replied Bob. 1--WE
had so many good things TO eat that the
whole family were awful sick way up to
New Years day. ~ Harpers Bazar
BETTER SEND THREE.
Freddy is an uncle, though very young
one indeed. His relationship to the two
stlll more youthful specimens ofhumanity
that he calls nephews adds so much to his
own self.importance that he has some
times TO be cautioned against sel6shness
when the three are playing together.
| These warnings have sunk deep in his
| mind, and in making known his needs in
| the way of Christmas presents, prospect
| i've visit of his nephews was carefully
| provided for in the following prayer; 80
| Lord l want rocking-horse for Christ.
mas, If you please. You'd better send
three, as want TO use mine all the time,
AN oBsERvANT ROY.
Mamma, have you seen many Of those
toboggan suits%
Eyes, dear. Why"
"Well, don't you think that if grandpa
should get the Toboggan Club out on hi
farm next summer the crows would keeI
out of his corntieldT
willie I'm ashamed ofyou."
Another pause,
Mamma, do they wear those suits Sc
that they can tobogganp'
"0f course, my dear. Why@
| "Well, / thought may be they tobog
gained so that they could wear tlIos'
suits. .n-[Chicago Tribune.