The Austin weekly statesman. (Austin, Tex.) 1883-1898, 1888-04-12
HOW TO KISS.
The First Caress Must be Quick,
Crisp and Elastic.

From the Chicago Times.
kiss is ths seal of affection. Byron
valued kiss by its strength, and meas
ured its strength by its length, but the
measuration of kisses went out of fashion
long ago. kiss is Duet of lips, in
which most holy love may be offered
and accepted. To young man 10 the
springtime of life kiss is the delerium of
love. According to Niphus, kiss is at
once the token of boldness, confidence, and
affection. A kiss is the rapture of bliss,
= the messenger of love, the cable of the
heart, and indiscribable, transcendent,
magical SO pething that is at once feast
and an Unsuitable famine.
Sydney Smith found much virtue in
well-delivered kiss, and the earl of Ches-
terfield looked the world over for cool,
caresslng kisses. Harriet Martineau, who
never had anyone to kiss but vagrant
bluestockings and the neighbors' babies,
wrote about "the kiss of the mouth that
touches not the mouth" and dear little
: Meta Comstock would not take second
time kisses that were not quick, crisp and
elastic. Kisses have been called the
hearts tongue, and though a lover be
never 80 great an orator one kiss on the
lips of his idolatress is often more
eloquent than library of words or
canto of verse. A gift returned is the
voice of dspleasure, but returned kiss
betokens esteem. Dickens valued kiss
above a thousand kicks. Sir Sidney
Garth lived to learn that kiss might
. prove traitor in an angels dress. Walter
Savage Landor seems to have had a pas
sion for kissing crying women, for he
thought it delightful to kiss the eyelashes
of love with fresh tears on them. Poor
John Keats wrote one evening as he sat
with his knee in his arms toasting his
toes in front of Jennie WEIGH Carlyle's
hearth-fire: II came to feel how far
above all fancy pride and tickle maiden
hood, all earthly pleasure, all imagined
good, was the warm tremble of devout
kiss"
DeLeVis called kiss the door that
opens the citadel of the heart, and poets
and people of all ages have found mys
FERROUS virtue, bitter-sweet, magic, and
elixirs and lotions of greater or less po-
tency, but the acme of human happiness,
wrote poetess, is that we may kiss
whom we please and please whom we
kiss. A kiss, to be success, must have
mutual interest; there must be recip-
rocity in the operation or somebody suf-
fers the punishment of disgust. Kissing
an unwilling pair of lips is as mean
victory az robbing birds nest, and
kissing too willing ones is about as I'M
fragrant pastime as making bouquets
out of dandelions.
At the start the average man makes
botch of kissing. The beauty of q kiss
lies in the impulsiveness and its impressi-
bility, nor is it possible to make the first
one too brief. There is danger in the
attempt to make the initial kiss complete.
The girl won't have it. There is too
much audacious avarice about it. The
thing to do is to go at the fair creatures
lips slowly, SO as not to frighten her. 1t
is to be expected that she will draw
them away from the point of attack, but
instead of retreat, the thing for herosism
to do is to kiss her on some place-the
cheek, the temple, behind the ear or on
the hair. woman's fancies are as
branching as the trees of forest, and
however unsatisfactory to the swain the
misplaced kiss may have been, it will, if
left to itself, make the recipient
wonderous indulgent next time.
She will caress the spot where
your lips have been, look at
the place through hand glass and dream
of the one who placed 1t there. When
sufficient progress has been made in the
love- making to warrant the ideal kiss,
take it methodically, with both hands and
"the gentle touch that love can teach"
Let the left arm go about-not her neck,
to wrinkle crepe lisse ruche and muss
seventy-tive cent couture, dressed for your
special benefit, no doubt-but about her
shoulders. Take her chin in the right
hand, allowing the three fingers to touch
the pretty white throat, holding the face
with the thumb and fore6nger, which will
form a sort of wise for loves conquest.
Move her head to one side and little
backward, and approaching so as to make
the quartet of lips describe the diameters
of an imaginary square, kiss her twice
the second double the length of its very
short predecessor. This double kiss is a
clew to mans culture. Only the uncouth,
ill-bred lover kisses as he learned to count
by units. The gentleman who has had
the good fortune to be born in an atmos-
phere of refinement makes a duet of his
first and fnal salutatiOn, whatever may be
numerical value of the intermediates.
The well-bred girl wants short, sharp,
snap ping kisses, that pop inaudibly, but
still that pop. A kiss on the hair IS the
kiss of the poet; tenderness is
implied when the lips pr )ss the eyelids;
reverence is spoken when the brow Is
caressed, and protecting love when the
cheek is empearled.
Nothing can sanctify kiss but love,
without which the sweetest lips are IN
savory and unwholesome.
Caution! Buy only DR.. Isaac Thomp-
sons Eye Water. Carefully examine the