Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1888-06-29
PERTINENT POINTS.

Runaway couple to minister: "Will
you join usP' Minister: Thanks.
don't. care If l do. - Washington
Critic.
Shot in the Saddle is the title Of a re-.
cent story. Not as dangerous. per
haps, as being shot in the headstall.-
4 1as fittings.
The impecunious dukes and other
nobIemen who come over here on IA
rich-g ri hunt are all in favor of com
mercial union. Aleu- York. EUentnJ
sun
IL am in the hands Of my friends,
as "A man remarked when the police
bore him away from fight in which
he was getting the wors. of it.-Ierts
SftMgs.
1t may be that Emperor Frederick is
living on because the doctors have as
cribed SO many different diseases to
him he doesn't know which one TO de
Of Chicago Time.
The cooking school lectures are
closed until fall to allow the pupils to
experiment on the new compounds
and give the dyspeptics chance to
recover. - Boston Globe.
DDlno OUc utS ulSCONtTcu tuOtUtf
remedy for rattlesnake bite than whis-
ky. But the majority of people who
are in the habit OF getting bitten will
probably stick TO the old remedy, or
else they'll not get bitten so often
hiLadet0hta Inquirer
Nav" said beautiful New Jer.
sey girl shyly. Il think that the hand
some young man who boards across
the way is becoming interested in me-
"Why so Lulu?" Because whenever
meet him on the street he always
winks. - Nel0 Tors sun.
Mrs Breezy (of Chicago to daugh-
ten: 1T has occurred to me of late.
dear, that George is not SO attentive
and devoted to you as he was when
you first became engaged. Miss Breezy
(nervously): "Oh, mamma. you don't
think he intends TO crawtish. do youT'
Epoch.
An attorney in case in Arkansas
got into dispute with the Judge on
the bench about ruling and ended it
by stabbing the judge several times.
The attorney was one Capt. McKinnon.
but from now on the people down
there will probably call him colonel
Chicago Times.
Charley That was good game of
poker we had last night" Harry:
First rate. How did you come out?"
Charlie: Ten dol ars ahead" Harry:
How did on figure il out that way?
You borrowed twenty, didn't you 10
begin on?' Charlie: yes but / only
lost 80 Of it - Washt tglon critic.
The queen of Spain has taken the
little boy king and II sters to BARGE
lona TO open the exposition there.
This. Of course, warrants the success
Of the expos ton so far as attendance
IS concerned but might not the man
agement have saved the expense of the
exposition by simply putting the royal
family on exhibition Tor money?-tht-
,d30 Times.
Gunnington appearing suddenly:
"Once for all, Clara. will you forgive
so trivial reason" Clara: mo.
Henry. nothing but very strong will
power-a power stronger than my
own would make me change my de-
termination. and Gas Henry turns away
heaven knows you've got it.
Henry Pr It'd BITS
One of the local ice dealers was
around few days since calling upon
his old customers, and one old woman
Informed him very tarty that she
shouldn't take ice of him any longer
why not?' was asked. because l
ran get it of someone else cheaper"
was the rcjoinder. al don't see how
that can be-" was the cool reply of the
ice man, for | have supplied you
YOU thirteen years and YOU haven't
paid me a cent yet IVe'tfe!d (uass)
Times.