Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1888-03-09
An Umbrella Protector.

The barkeeper called his attention
to printed card which hung several
feet above the rack on the wall. 1t
reads as follows:
"Any one attempting to steal the
umbrella is expected to set 'em up"
The card hung so high on the wall
that a casual observer would fail to
see it.
The barkeeper with an eye to bust
ness, had all these preliminaries fully
arranged for the first rainy day of the
season. 1t was early in the morning
that his initial victim appeared The
humid clouds were distilling drench-
ing shower as an able practitioner of
the law appeared for his morning
cocktail He drank the liquid concoc-
ton with infinite relish, and then, but
toning up his coat, moved toward the
door. The umbrella caught his eye.
1t was raining cats and dogs. The
downpour was prodigious. He east
furtive but hurried glance over his
shoulder at the barkeeper. That i'll
genious worthy was giving his whole
attention to his glasses. Then the
lawyers hand went out swiftly to the
alluring umbrella. He touched the
handle-the alarm rang out clear and
distinct-the barkeeper turned his eyes
on the culprit
"Old man." he observed, with gentle
tenderness, lust read that card above
your head"
The lawyers glance took in the sit
uation and he returned to the counter.
What shall it be-" he inquired,
with all lawyers effrontery.
well" replied the barkeeper, las
you and | are the only persons pres
ent, l reckon you will have to stand
small bottle
Set them up"
The wine was drunk, and then the
disciple of Blackstone, true TO his
calling, announced his intention of
remaining few minutes to see what
the next customer would do.
Even as he spoke bustling, active
broker put in an appearance.
"Whiskey straight, please. It's an
awful wet morning"
And scarcely waiting for his change
he was hurrying out when suddenly
his feet seemed glued TO the floor. a
swift glance was cast back at the dis
penser of drinks, and then his nervous
fingers closed firmly on the handle of
the umbrella. The warning bell rang
out its signal, and the barkeeper and
the lawyer gazed in establishment at
the pilferer.
You had better look at the card on
the wall, suggested the gentleman
with tire white apron.
The broker looked, and came back
slowly to the bar,
Il guess we'll have bottle on this,
but Id like to stay here awhile and
see some other fellow caught"
And he did. There was a constant
influx of visitors, and the warning bell
rang almost necessarily. Every man
staid TO see some other culprit caught
in The act. The house never did such
a thriving business. And it has kept
it up ever since. a mysterious rumOr
went abroad that something out of the
ordinary was to be seen at the place
in question, and every day since the
saloon has been invaded by eager
crowds. The rainy weather has kept
the trap in full operation. And as
those who go in and are bitten remain
to see who will be the next unfOrtu-
nate, setting EN- up for the crowd
becomes very serious business. De-
casionally the man pleads poverty,
but they make him leave his watch
or diamond ring while he goes out for
the money to redeem it. There is no
backing down. The man had rather
treat than be thought thief in earn
est, and this is the only loophole he
has for escape.