The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1888-09-01
A BOOMERANG BOYCOTT.
Some Racy Extracts From Late Issue ei
tho Arizonu "kIcker."

tne ATi,o"'
THEY BoYCoTT Us.-The fact that
| we have been running the Kicker pref
| ty much as we pleased since the first
| number was issued has given mortal
offense to certain people in this neigh
borhood. We have been kicked, licked,
pounded, threatened, shot at and
bluffed right along, and have growi
| fat on it.
| We came to stay.
Fact is, we've got to. We haven't
any thing to go on.
| Having tried all other measures to
make us let go, and having failed in
gloriously in each instance, 1t was de-
termined to boycott us in social way.
We have been chuck-a-luck with the
very cream OF society since our advent
In fact, we have been most of tho
cream.
1t was decided n few days ago by
syndicate of the high-toned that we
must be socially snubbed and crushed.
Accordingly Mrs. Major Bazoo, of
Grizzly Nights, announced n recherche
affair and invited everybody in the set
but us. 1t was given out that she
feared our manners would disgrace the
occasion, and if they didn't our clothes
would.
We weren't saying a word. We saw
the bluff and went one better. On tho
night of the party the sheriff made q
haul of three high-toned prisoners ut
the house of Major Bazoo, while half IL
dozen others broke for the woods. We
have got one great advantage over the
other creams of society. We left the
East by daylight and shook hands with
the sheriff as we started. We are
neither q bigamist, eloper, embezzler,
horse thief, jailbird or gambler. We
don't want to work this lever unless
some one jumps on our collar. We
have reduced tony society over half
since we came here by giving the sheriff
pointers. We can run the other half
out of town in week. Mrs Major
Bazoo has called to beg our pardon and
express her deep disgust with herself.
We have forgiven her, knowing it will
not happen again. AS for Judge ca
, boots, who inspired the boycott and set
the crushing machine at work, we bear
him no animosity. We will simply re-
| mark that he is bigamist, incendiary,
= embezzler, forger, perjurer and high
| way robber, and we have dispatched
8 Pinkerton to come and get him.
WE SHAN'T WoRRY.-Our amiable
and gentlemanly sheriff entered our
Office day before yesterday in his usual
urbane manner and announced that he
must serve papers on us. 1t was
,, notice of O breach-of-promise suit
| against us by the widow Clixby, who
alleges that we have been toying with
her heart strings, and that it 2'ill take
S.. 600 of our cash to settle her thought:
back in the old channel.
1t is another move on the part of oul
enemies to down us.
ii We first met the widow Clixby twenty
eight days ago in Carter's grocery
4 She asked our opinion of herrings and
! we asked hers of soap. She invited
us to call at the house and see some
v poetry she had written on the rise and
fall of the mastodon. We complied
We called there three or four time
afterwards, but only as friend. Oh
one occasion the widow showed us {
y clipping from an Eastern paper to the
y effect that it was better for man who
had passed the age of twenty. three tt
marry a widow, if he was to marry, bu
y we didn't bite.
o We know our gait. If the widow
Clixby can prove to the world that W.
u have toyed with her affections wei
!, cheerfully go to Jail. We are not OF
4 the toy. The widow will find us M
y ack-rabbit, and the enemies who have
encouraged this new move may hea
% something drop before the trial is over
k A SAD MooD.-Wednesday evening
It as we put on our Mother Hubbard ant
u sat down by the open window to get ,
s. breath of air before retiring, a sadness
u suddenly stole over us and in a few
q minutes we found tears in our eyes
s The query came to us over and owe
n and over again: "Is life worth tn
i livingp" and as we thought of the oil
/ homestead-the days of boyhocd-th
= many graves-the changes of thirt
i years-the fountains of the deep wer
's broken up and we wept.
Such moods do man good. The,
bring him nearer Heavens gate. w
don't know whether they come from
y disordered liver or the near presence o
@ guardian angel, but we always feel {
" heap better afterwards. We no longe
q feel spirit of revenge. We have NJ
% greed. We feel charity for all.
. And as the bright beams of the har
p vest moon steal into our Office window
% and throw IL flood of silver light upol
u the dead ads on the imposing stone
~ as the south wind comes signing aroun'
: the corner of Jackass Hill and whis
+" pers to us the story of household
- graves-as the whip-poor-will wake
u from his sweet sleep in the rear O
u Stevens disreputable dance house t.
% call to us to press onward and upwar'
VI and be not discouraged, we take dow
IT the Office towel, wipe the falling tear
% away, and seek our couch with the dc
J, termination to secure pass from her
to Omaha and return or make it so no
% for the railroads that they will have t
" keep every tie wet all the year round
y. Detroit Free Press.