Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1888-03-10

"No. they don't belong to me, re-
snonded the old man. shortly after
Young Sampson left you last night
Thought I heard a noise outside, and
shouldn't be surprised if Nero had been
shaking him for the cigars. Evidently
the dog won"
REMARKABLE IF TRUE.
Mr.. De Sappy-Ya-as, time works
wonders. Why, when | was born was
the youngest in my family, and now
there are faw bwothers, all younger than
myself. ;.
Admiring Crowd-Isn't it extraordl-
nary.-Lge.
A TALENTED GIRL.
He Ito Miss Breezy OF Chicago
Your friend, Miss Shawsgarden, OF st.
Louis, is something Of linguist, IS she
not, Miss Breezy!
Miss Breezy-Ycs; Clara speaks
French, German and the Missouri
languages.
HE PICKED UP THE PIN.
A Main street merchant who believes
in the old saving of "See pin and pick
| il I'D and all the day you'll have good
luck" saw pin in front OF the Post
Office the other day, and while stopping
to capture it, his hat fell of and rolled
into the street, two suspender buttons
gave away in the rear, his collar split
open, and his store teeth, which cost
Sl3 when new, fell out and broke on the
walk. He picked up the pin however.
Berkshire Courier.
SHE FORGOT.
There is q charitable institution in
Boston-we will say Boston-and each
dav one lady has to take charge of a
public department of it. One young
lady had selected Wednesday as her
day, and the first week she was to COM
mcnce her round of duties another lady
received from the President a little note:
Dear Mrs. -: Can you take charge
on Wednesday! 1t was arranged that
Miss - was to be here, but she forgot
that it was the day she was to be mar
ried, and she can't come. san Fran
cisco Chronicle.
THE RUG QUESTION
Mr.. lie Grand Mills (of Minneapolis,
picking up bric-a-brac for the new
house, That's pretty good one. Come
from Bengal, you say!
Salesman-Yes, sir; he was shot i'll
Nagpore.
Mrs. Mills-Haycn'ty You got one that
was killed i'll Daggystan! l understand
they're more stylish-7id- Bits.
A LESSON IN NAVIGATION.
Officer of Deck Ito an able seaman)--
Drunk, were you, sir! What's your
name2 Jack-Cain, sir. officer (stern-
" jocular)-The man who slew his
brother! Jack shifting his quid) No,
sir; I'm the man who got Slowed. '-BgE
talo Erpross.
A SWITCH.
A serious accident occurred IN an up
town house the other night by n mis-
placed switch. The owners husband
stepped upon it and ran hairpin into
his foot to the depth of an inch. Nor
ristorR HerdH.
MUSCULAR CHRISTIANITY.
Burt was twelve years old. He cam.
home from Sunday-schoal one day. and
said he had taught Il class of little boys.
"What possessed you to do such a
thingl" asked his mother.
ooh, got along first rate. They be.
gan to ~gigglc, and told them if they
didn't quit it | would lick every last ono
of them when Sunday school was out.
The Superintendent says it was the
stillest class there was. "-DetrOt Free
Press.
A BUSINESS CoURTsHIP.
He, with emotion-Now, dearest, thai
: you have accepted my proposal, let us
seal it with n kiss.
She, in business tone-What's the
use? Your bid has been accepted
and there's no need of sealed proposals
Washington Critic.
, AN ARIZONA sEANCE.
! Omaha Man-Went to spiritual
scance down in Arizona, eh! Anything
happen
Arizona MAXWELL, yes. The me
dunn went into Il trance and then an
nOunced that he was n spirit of MAJ
who had been murdered, and that the
murderer was in the audience.
, "Wcll, well Did anybody run Z"
eve all ran. - ON hd World.
A VETERAN HoUsEKEEPER.
!, Brown-Do you know how long Rol
inson has been keeping house!
Smith-No; but it must be n goo
!, many years. l took dinner with hin
). the other day, and he carved due
without splitting it on the floor
Bdzar.
NOT BARGAIN DAY.
'1 know l am not match for YOU i
wealth or in social position" he SAID
! 81 know how unworthy am of You, We
> may not hope that perhaps some tim
/ some day"
EYES," she assented, lifting her regf
4 head: 'some day, as you Justly remark
: may be glad to consider your propos
ton. But not, | think, in the near FL
ture. No, Mr.. Secondshelf, it is nc
bargain day on this counter yet.-Fro,
Peek.
!, CHARGE IT.
!. Margaret-Has he called againl
+ Maid-Yes, 'um; what shall / te
himl
i Margaret-Oh, anything; only get ri
= of him. Tell him any lie you pleas
- and have it charged to my account
~ NeU York Sun.
GOOD ENOUGH.
An IrisLman was standing in the doc
of his little cabin. A pig was playin
! inside with his children. 4 gentlema
- passing said to him: my good fellow
~ why do you allow that pig in You
bouses"