Morning journal and courier., 1888-12-10
 EXCES SKVE.

Query: Can man who dies from excess of joy be said to die happy deatha--A New York Shool Girl.s j. ufa
 Why not call them hay widows? Hay is grass with the greenness squeezed out.-l Binghanton Republican. yea s63 ! TThasen of wealthy shoemaker might ap- propriately be referred to as his fathers sole heir.-Rochester Post Express.
 A new broom sweeps clean: but it doesn't sweep half as clean as new hired girl with an old broom.-Burlington Free Press.
 The Chicago News heads an article "An- archy at York; Guess not. If anarchy should go to work it wouldn't be ansrehy.- St. Paul Pioneer-Press.
 Energy superfuous-Custome (to grocer's boy) -sYou don't seem to be very energet- ic little boy. Don't you feel wellg'' Boy ssYes, I feel all right, but the boss is out to Iuncht"-Life.
 The unfortunate.-stI never saw such an unlucky man as I am. Here I find piece of money and it is only nickel. If anyone else had found it, 1t would have been quar- ter.-Fliegsnde Blatter.
 Criticism on the theater-'sChildren, If you will be real good and not shout so for eight days you shall go to the theater. :" "Oh, we'd a great deal rather be bad and scream. It's lots more fun. n."-Fliegende Blatter.
 "Dear, me, Janet, you've spilled water all over my playhouse" complained her sister.
 HOh, but never mind," said Janet. "We'll play it rains so few1y in their country the dolls will be glad. Christian Advocate. Indignant author-Is it true, sir, that you have said I am destitute of talenti Sarcastic party-It is not true. I assure you, my dear sir, this is the first time ever heard your talent spoken oE-Chicago Globe. .sIf you will guarantee that that is a real genuine solitaire ring, Mir. Pennywait," said | Mrs. New Vorioh the other day, 'sIll take it. But don't want to get home and find that | have been deceived. d."-Jewellers' Weekly. "Hello, Nosei What are you doing nowF ''I'm repotah." "Reporterl Reporter on a daily paperf' 'tNo, sah. You know ] waal, rse been reprinted. ."-Harper's Bazar my heart beats tonight; ia it because I have pToposedi
 Evalina-What you hear, sweetest, is the servant pumping water to the third 6oor.- Town Topics.
 Enelishman-Are the police here 50 much more clever than those we have at homei New Yorker-You bet they are. Just walk the street any wet night, and you'll see | the New York cop knows enough to get inside | when it rains.--Town Topics. l Mrs. Hashcroft-f'That new boarder need ' | He's either married or a widower." Billings -eHow can you tella" Mrs. Hsshcroft- | "He always turns his back to me when he | opens his pocketbook to settle. ."-Terrt Haute Expresa.
 | A small girl appeared at Sunday school re- gently with dime which she had brought for the purpose of putting it into the contri- button box. The money seemed to afford hel ] the liveliest satisfaction and after displaying \ it for some time with an ostentation wbiel was evidently intended to elicit question 1T I regard to the manner in which she became possessed of SO much wealth she could con- tain herself no longer and broke out with:
 "Teacher, I've got ten cents for the pool little heathen, and I earned it myself"
 ''Did you2" her teacher responded approv' ingly. "That was nice. Can't you tell u how you earned it, so that some other ittl' girl will know how to earn something for tn missionary box next Sundays"
 "Oh, yes," answered the child with livel. air of conscious virtue; t'I scratched grand mothers back ten cents' worth. ."-Bostol Courier.