Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1888-09-20


seat by bribins one Of the brakemen with
nozious cigar. This gave fine view of the
country. You could sec fifteen miles to any
Of the thirty-two points OF the compass
perhaps further The country was as fat as
IA congressional debate 1t was in the valley
Of the Red River OF the North. A long lank
man with tim hair aud hollow cheeks came
and climbed up in the cupola with me and
helped mo abuse the scenery. He had a
wandering eye and distracted air and said
he had boen up to Winnipeg to sell some real
esta and was now, as he expressed it, on
his way back to Coils country. Most of the
various articles of clotni he wore were too
large for him, though some were too small
He INDUCED in great tites OF dark, forbid
ding looking tobacco and had solemn, half
detected expression.
Colonel he said, with an infection which
told that no addressed every man he met by
that title, Colonel, what shall we do to pass
away the timet | never play keerds with
strangers on a train" he added with, it
So med to me, unnecessary haste
didn't know Of anything to do, except
abuse the country.
IL know what" he went on; "let's each
che Of us tell u story"
IAN right" replied
Ats a 90 them" he said; whats your
story 'boutr
MY story is about a man." replied I'M
blushingly, who owned u COW that had only
one horn, and that wasn't much Of horn,
you know. It's mostly about the cow" |
added desperately, wondering what | could
possibly tell about COW that had only one
horn and that not really all horn should lie.
Sounds first rate" he replied. But two
dollars m half it II be laundering good
story. Mine is only jess bout Teller that
took his girl to a shindig-jess scrub ev'ry
day story. Blaze away with your COW
yarn"
Couldn't think Of it, sir couldn't think Of
It for u moment You go ahead first want
to hear all about the Teller who took his girl
to the shindg"
Well he replied slowly, and | thought
be looked even more solemn than before "ali
right I'll do Though I'm somewhat anx-
ious to know about that COW. Which horn
was it that was comet No matter, though
III know when you tell it, The fellow | was
speaking of came down to a little town where
| useter live. in Minnesota, and started q
newspaper. 1t was an awful weak paper,
and he was cussed fool He was little. and
had red eyes, and went around with his head
u
face and lie didn't know nothing anyhow.
lie didn't know how to run a 1--we newspaper.
| built u new hon house-one that jess made
the hens open their mouths and cackle when
they seen it--but he never said word about
it in his paper. lie didn't seem 10 have the
ability to discuss public questions like this
at all.
"A ell one night there was q shndig out
of town about mile, at Old Man Piummer's
place 1t WIS IA big un-they had hree i'd
d,ers and the organ they borrowed from the
Methodist church. or course this ere Char
he R,Sges-thct was his name-this 'ere
editor-of course Charlie must 60 lie
couldn't SEQ hen house, but he could q shin
dig. lie blowcd about it il his paper before
hand, too, and called 1T a hop, which pred
jerdiced some asin it, too. If he had only
kuowcl it Neil lie went out some six or
seven miles on Gopher perairie auG got Old
Hoss Perkins darter to take 10 tins hop, as
he called 1T She want no caller SICILY
specimen-sho could precerate the good
p'lntS of len house as fur us she could see
it, They got to the Old mans bout dark,
jess cs the head fiddler was turning up
"Well, the night were on, which remark
once read, and everything was all o. X
The dancin' was kep' up Lively an ev'rybod
had good time. Charlie, the ( Her I'm
a-talkin' bout. brought the girl to the blow
out in one o. these ere one boss busgies th-t
has powerful small wheels in front an power
ful big uns behind VI ell, long bout mid
night. nebby little past, when it was dark
as string o black cats, bout twelve, or
uebby some past, | don't know e. r.iy some
o the boys went out to this ere buggy,
kinder, an sorser walked around it, an
hcftcd 1t, an til ed a little, an said it looked
Ike rain, an sized up the buggy, an by an
by sorter somehow changed tue wheels on the
blamed thing-put the bchind ones forard
an the for ard ones behind, you see. The
boys done it, you know, for sort of joke,
recSon Meboy they wanted to see If q man
what couldn't see henhouse would catch
onto n buggy with its front r'ared up II the
ar Ike treadmill. It made powerful
funny looain' busgy of it-'peared to lie built
some Ike bul-erlo-hish in front an low
behind | never seen sch high should
cred buggy before nor since. 1t looked 'sif 1t
had its forcrd fest up'n the Manager reach
in over into the oat bin.
well the night wore some more, till l
O'Clock, when Charlie, this ere youth what
thought be could run a paper, said he Sues.ei
they'd better 60 home. So ho hitched up, an
Old Hoss' darter put on her dry goods-her
wraps an fiyin's-an' went out an got in the
buggy with Charlie. Still dark's the inside
of a cow-no moon for month, an the stars
all clouded under There's something wrong
with this ere buggy saws Old Hoss girl
NO. nutnin the natter says Charlie, wore
jess goin' up hill, that's ALL an then they
both leaned forard TO keep from fallin' over
hackards
THE girl still thought there was somethin'
out o whack with the conveyance, an said
she allowed she'd have TO tie a fatiron to her
feet TO Ike from goin' out behind Don't
git accited, says Charlie, "we'se jess goin'
up old Dad Hawkins hill So they ken
naggin along. naggin along. slow like, an
Charlie let the hoss stop an rest ev'ry little
ways. cause he said it must be powerful hard
work to draw up such a steep hill So they
KEEP pokin' long. pokin long, an Charlie
lived to git out an walk If the hill got much
sleeper. So they leaned for'ards, an part O.
the time hung on to the dashboard with
their hands If they did strike little hill, an
KEEP snailin' long. snailin' long. A good
deal of the time they stopped to let the boss
catch his breath, it bein' such powerful
long hill, an then they'd sit there quiet as Q
pot o. paint, an think BY an by
Tue EAil oSSun 70 GIT Spuhky L We traS-
eied this ere road before she said, AN
never seen no such INDUSTRIOUS hill oh.
that's all right; that's all right. says Charlie,
we're now goin' up old Pap Neil's hill But
where is the boiler between old Dad Haw-
kins' hill an old Pap Neirs hillr says julie
her name was julie i low as how the road
commissioners must a. filed it up an made
one long hill,' says Charlie So they leaned
for'ards an KEEP moseyin' long slow, an
lettin' the boss rest so be wouldn't b all
tired out when they got to the top Of the
hill, an still 1t was dark as the inside of a
infidel Mebby half a nour they didn't say
nothin', an then says Charlie: .Jule,' says be.