Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1888-12-27
..1,hen where are, theyps'


elm the shirt you have on, OF course
You never had but one set
.4Oh, didn't! Some men have SGT
for every day in the year. supPoses
There Is another interval OF saieoces
during which he is supposed to get
into the shirt, but it is presensiye
broken by: -,
s.Where's my Sunday pantatoonss
changing up in the clothes press
..Tbey are not there! I've looked
the blamed thing over forty timess
.Sln the first hook ut the right OF
the door,"
..What did you 60 and move them
off the first hook to the left OF the door
for? Hereafter want you to let my
clothes alone" .s.lfss-s.s
have about three minutes OF rest
and then Mr. Bowser inquiries:
ia there any such thing as collar
in this house, or have all OF mine been
taken for dish cloths and mop rags?
..Your collars are in with your shirts
It is strange how helpless some men
are"
: There is silence for about five min
utes, this time. Then Mr.. Bowser
collar buttoned, his hair standing up
and his eyes having dangerous look.
Mrs. Bowser. do you pretend this
is one of my collarsr' he huskily de-
mands.
Certainly it is. Any thing wronge"
Wrong! Why, the internal thing
won't go half around my neck! TIL be
hanged if this isn't the worst run house
in Michigan!'
1 buttoned his collar. It buttons
very easily and he goes back up stairs
to put on his necktie and vest and call
out:
How much did that secondhand
man give you for my coat?"
81 haven't sold any coat"
You must have! L can't find my
Sunday coat anywhere up here. 1t
isn't down in the basement, is itP"
1 go up. and his coat is lying across
a chair. right whore he flung it.
cit will be the last time / go to
church for a year. and you chalk that
down!" he growls as descend to finish
my dressing.
BY ten O'clock Mr.. Bowser is dressed
and downstairs. Then he discovers
that his shoes want q shine and his hat
and overcoat must be brushed. and .
after pulling the right shoe on the left
foot he mildly observes:
Church! church,! Don't you ever
say church to me again.
By and by he discovers that he is
minus handkerchief and gloves. and
after going up stairs and hunting
arc und he calls out:
Ibid the young 'un swallow all the
handkerchiefs in the house,"
mo. dear, you will find a clean one
in your hip pocket.
why didn't you say so at frst?"
''You didn't ask"
''Well. my gloves are gone"
They are in your coat-tail pocket"
''Oh! they are! You saw me come
upstairs and never said word.
suppose now I'll have to wait half an
hour for you"
mo, dear-Tm all ready. / had TO
stop to tell the cook about those ducks,
and to feed the baby. aud to fix a but
ton on my shoe. but I'm all ready"
''It's the last time fool around like
this. There! my burned old watch has
stopped"
'.Never mind the watch. Let's be-
going"
land 1 believe I've busted my eus-
pendersr'
/ get him started, however. He
growls all the way to church. scowls
at the minister throughout the ser
mon, and it's only after the service is
out that he says to me as we walk
homewards:
''Mrs. Bowser, I wish you would
reform in one matter. Look at the
number of people out to church to-day,
and then think how they would esti-
mate us if we stayed at home. 1 hope
to see you more enthusiastic about
getting out to services!"
"Why, dear. I'm always ready to
go!''
"Then prove it by your actions. It's
a duty we owe to the neighborhood
and to ourselves, and If can't get you
started without such a fuss as you
made this morning / shall go alone
hereafter!"- Detroit Free Press.