davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14
He Enioyed the Sermon.

Dr.. Payson, of Portland, Me-, used to tell
this good story: Zone very rainy Sunday he
went to his church as usual, but no one ap-
peared except an old negro, who came in and
asked if DR.. Payson was to preach The
doctor said YES" and went into the pulpit
and preached to the choir and the old negro
Some months afterward he met the negro and
asked him il he enjoyed that sermon. EN-
JOY dat sernonP replied the old man. ~
eixr, doctor, l nebber heerd a better one
Yo' see had a seat pretty well up front, an
whenebber you'd say somethin's pretty hard
like gin de sins OBJ men, I'd jess look all
'roun ter see who you's hittin', an
wouldn't see nobody on'y jess me- An says
to m'self, he muss mean you, Pomp. you's
sech q dretful sinner. Well, doctor, dat az
sermon set mo a thinking what big sinner
war. an went an jined the church down
home Use deacon New York Sun.
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14
A Calf That Reasoned.

We learn that an amusing Incident occur
red at the homo Of Mr.. 8. NJ Jones. near
Bethel, last week. Among tho cattle was
calf that seemed to possess a very great dis
like to being roped at milking time and
always mndo quite 10 do when tho rope
was adjusted. One morning Mrs. Jones went
out to attend the milking and upon looking
In the accustomed place for the rope failed to
find It While the search for il was going on
the calf thought, perhaps, to get more than
his share of the milk, but something seemed
TO interfere with the i,nbibing process, and
bis peculiar actions attracted attention to
him Wbereupon 10 was discovered that the
calf had swallowed the rope, but failed to
make complete jobo it as the moose was
hanging from one corner Of his mouth. The
moose was laid bold Of and steady pull
brought the rope to light The calf d suf-
fcently amused and doesn't swallow any
more ropes 70 evads being tisd-Grssnville
IN. c. Rsdector.
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14

To be freed from the dangers Of sufiocztion
while lying down; TO breathe freely. sleep
soundly and undisturbed; to rise refreshed,
head clear. brain aetiye and tree from pain or
ache; TO know thss no poisonous. putrid mat
ter deflles the breath and rots away the deli
cate machinery Of smeil. taste and hearing;
to feel that the system does not. through It's
veins and arteries. suck up the poison that 10
sure to undermine and destroy, Is indeed 3
blessing beyond all other human enjoyments
To purchase immunity from such fate should
be the object of sll affiIcsed. But those who
have tried many remedies and physicians
despair Of relief or cure.
Sanford's Radical Cure meets eyeFY phase of
Catarrh, from simple head cold TO the most
loathsome and destructive STAGES. Its local
and constitutional. Instant In relieving, per
msnent in curing. safe. economical and never
failing, 8
Sanford's . Radical Cure consists of one bottle
OF the Radical Cure, 8 box Catarrhal Soly-
ntand one Improved Inhaler. all wrapped In
one Package. with treatise and directions and
sold by all druggists for 81.
Potter Drug and Chsmieal Co.. Boston.
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14

alley and was driven back by the crowd, but
was still unable to engage the attention Of the
ssAap who had waited on him. and finally
went out OF the front door, leaving his bill
unpaid He vent to his room, where, during
the remainder Of the night, no saw nothing
tut the gleam OF cheese knife and an In
furiated mob. On Monday he went back to
the place and explained To the head man how
be had gone away the night before, leaving
his bill unpaid.
~ don't pelieve 1t. said the boss II nsfer
had a man do dot way before You want to
blay me shoak. You gid rigid away owd
80 quick as dot, or ! call me Shake and der
sheseknife. und we half some more fun. Gid
owd You was delegade, pet you"
"Then 1 can't payr said the honest man
from Washington.
.No, you can put It in der slot wid der
scales un weigh yourself by seeing it go. But
don't taig nuddings from YOU It would
hocdoo der piznesa Chicago Mail
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14

n + Located In Chicago. and to the
Earaesf Endeayors Of It's Promoter
Hany Reclaimed Man Owes His Pres
eat Good Characser.
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14
FATE OF THE BASEBALL UMPIRE.


t.. Seas - ~. - sa,.e... h.s.
AnS =. - :. - -. s.,,.a Sahon,tr
~. ~ 10 re saes ~ ....I ~. Srn'' q.o 80
a, ~. S.sa.ss
D., ~. ss.a...S ..I N . mat
80 e - .. - Iess
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14
LOCAL NOTICES.


-, MI. W. H. Morgan, merchant Lake City,
RIA, was taken with a severe cold, attend
so with distressing cough and running
into consumption In its first stages. He
tried many so-called popular cough RENE
aies and steadily grew worse. Was re-
duced In flesh, had difficulty In breathing
ana was unable to sleep. Finally tried DIR.
Kings New Discovery for Consumption
and found immediate relief, and after us
ing about half dozen bottles found him
self well and has had no return OF the dis
ease. No other remedy can show 30 grand
record OF cures as DR.. Kings New Dis
covery for Consumption. Guaranteed to
do Just what is claimed for II. Trial bottle
free at Charles Ludlow & Co.'s drug store.
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14

No. IL hA8 Through 6Iooper1 % New Y0Fk MA
Boston without change.
No. 1 10 the famous limited express, con.
Cleveland. ihroaen yessibuIe siesn:rs f,a1
Springfield. Makes ncw York ir SDx houFo
xnd Boston In ~ ho1rs.
q. n. KNIGHT,
T. &. Ticket Agent.
D. .. MARTIN. Arcade Depot,
q. =. A. Springnea1.o
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14
She Had Tried Everything Else.

CLovxR BorroH. Sullivan county. Tenn.
June Is, 1ssT-Blcod Balm Co.. Atlanta. Gs.:
Sir Il have been thinking Of writing 20 you
for some time Co let you know OF the wonder
ful cure your b. B. b has affected on myself
and daughter. She. a girl OF 10 years, was
taken with a very sore leg below the knee.
called on the very best doctors that the eoun-
Try could afford and they tended on her for
four years 10 no purpose. Her leg got worse
every year. used about 50 BOTTLES OF other
medicine to no purpose The doctors said the
only remedy left was amputation- That We all
was opposed to. was In Knoxville the Ssh
of January. 1886. and while buying bill Of
drugs called for q good blood purifier. and
Messrs Sanford, Chamberlain i Co. recon-
mended the b. B. B. ] purchased one half
dozen bottles. ard 20 my utter surprise after
using three or four bottles my giri's leg was
entirely healed. / also had q very ugly run
ming sore on the calf of my leg and one bottle
cured 1t. after having tried all other RENE
dies. wish you much success, and DO hope
that all suffering humanity may near and be
ieve In the only true blood purifier. / have
ried three or four other purifiers. but
he B. B. B. Is the only one that ever did me
or mine any good. You can use my name II
you wish. l am well known In this and WASH
ington county, also all over Virginia.
R. s. ELsox.
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14
A Personal Illustrates.

Hon. Amos J. Cummings tells . funny
story about a printer named Austin While
Cummings was setting type in The New
York Tribune Office a good many yesrs ago,
Austin did "snb" work spell One day
Austin said to Cummings: This ofics is
more honest than The Times ofica"
"WhyP
Because when went out today I left an
apple on my case, and when / came back,
there it was, safe and sound; nobody had
eaten it
'sWellfs
.Now, just to show you how different The
Times printers are, while ! was working
There last week, one Of the boys went Of,
leaving an orange on his case. ! took it and
ate it. Chicago NewA
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14
CHICAGO RESTAURANTS.
An Honest Man Who Wanted to Pay but
Couldn't

An Honest Man Who Wanted to Pay but
Couldn't
One Of the Washington writers who came
on to do the convention had iabored hard on
Sunday and Sunday night After his work
he concluded to cool his feverish palate with
a glass of Gambrinus own and a cheese
sandwich He repaired for this purpose to a
place On Clark street and began quietly to
partake Of his Refreshments.
Have you a rapkinr he asked of
waiter
"WhatIr shriekes. the waiter
"A napkin"
"You wipe yom self NIT your haind We
don'd keep no napkins In here"
The Washington man proceeded with his
lunch A few minutes later there was q row
in the front end of the house Sixteen wait
ers hopped upon one man Some of these
walters had bottles and one of them had
cheese knife about as long as mans arm
The chap who had waited ON the Washington
correspondent joined in the fracas, and tar
ried in the fun SO long that the Washington
man could find no one to accept his quid pro
quo. He at last concluded to 60 out at q side
door and thus avoid being summoned as
witness to a saloon row Hs rot out into the
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14

the patient the craving for food, which he
hes not tasted for week or two, perhaps,
and with returning appetite comes color and
strength. A majority OF our patients could
leave the home In three or four days, SO far
as their physical health Is concerned
But the patient Is not permitted to 60 at
the end Of that time. The home now takes
hold of him and endeavors to build up bis
moral character, In much the same way as
ais body has been won back TO its normal
condition The hope Is to send him forth
into the world hraced TO Withstand the temp
tations Of drink. A patient must remain In
the home thirty days, whether he wants to
On not, though he Is not under the same re-
straint as when in hospital he may go out
upon the street few hours each day, &C
companied by an empioye Of the home He
Is now q boarder, and not a patient He
hnds that the home Is much like hotel, ex-
ce2t that the cooking is more wholesome and
there are some rules to be observed II is
sometning new 70 60 20 Deu at III
O'Clock each night, rise at 9, breakfast half
an hour later and attend lectures and re-
hgious services in the chapel sat down TO
dinner one day, at the invitation Of Superin
tendent wilkins, with eighty drunkards.
They were a queer lot. Sailors from the lake
and laborers from the streets sat side by side
with law yers and ministers of the Gospel Yes,
priests and ministers, for the home is rarely
without an inmate of this sort. One clergy
man has been in the home no fewer than six
times, and has tine delirium trenlens every
tir1e he comes. His visits are about six
mon; as apart. and meantime he fills pulpit
MOI far from Chicago and fiils il ecceptsbly
How he mana zes to conceal bis habits from
his dsacons is more than can understand
In the dining room noticed that all Of these
men had ravenous appetites. and were a
cheerv. sociahla lot. crsnkine manv fnksa
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14

Tho people Of Calais never saw genuine.
living and moving millionaire TILL Uncle
Russell Sage went down there the other day
to buy the Grand Southern railroad With
true down east hospitality q son OF the hotel
landlord hitched up span Of horses and
gave Millionaire Sage delightful ride about
town. Uncle Russ was profuse in his ex-
press;ons Of pleasure, and after the drive was
over put bis hand right down TN his pocket
and gave the young man nice. round, silver
ten cent pieca The young man was much
surprised He did not expect anything. He
has had hole punched in that ten cent piece
end win wear it ON his watch chain -Lewis-
ON Journal
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14
euRoeTTe's HuMoR.
HoHrsICK.

HOGESICK.
"Ah me-" sighed a disconsolate emigrnnt
down In Pennsylvania, ~ wish dot hat me
money enough to take to Germany back al
ready" "And suppose give you the
moaey,r said the kind hearted employer.
"B.' chiminy. / shtart for Kansas dis after
nocnIn
DUrIFUL SON
A young man thoughtlessly drew TO
volver, cooked it and pointed 1t at his
mother. The old lady, with hollow groan,
fell dead at his feet "Good land, mother
exclaimed the young man, ''you make me
tired. Get up; this revolver has seven loads
in it" The mother sprang lightly to her
feet "Heaven bless you, my son, ;" she cried,
warmly, ~ thought it was empty. How
could think 90 meanly Of you, who have
ever been thoughtful and consideraten
NAY BE YoU NEVER THIED THIS.
Middlerib's 7-year-old boy had fallen out
of spreading chestnut tree and lay stunned,
breathless and motionless In vain the weep
ing mother and anxious physician strove to
bring breath or movement back to the limp
and nerveles figure LET me try" said the
father in broken tones He bent over the
lad with hair brush. keep real still now,
Harry, while papa brushes your hair" he
said, and In thirty seconds that boy had
looked out Of every window In the room six
times, and once he had looked out of two win
dows, up the chimney, behind the bureau
and under the bed at the same tina
LITERARY TREAT.
"Where were you last nightr asked Odd
Hyson with look over his spactacles that
was enough to curdle young mans blood.
"At the music hall readings, sr,' answered
Young Hyson, with the painful effort Of
man who has written cut his impromptu re-
marks and committed them to memory.
"What was the programrner asked Old
Hyson IAN e7ening with Dickens, sir" re-
piled the youth THAT is, said the old man
severely, you had the dickens Of a night.
And the sigh with which Young Hyson re-
sponded came through his nose In long
drawn melancholy cadence. like the rush Of
dry steam from superheeted coppers, and
blew the mornings mail about the desk like
leaves on prairie Then he tried to groan,
succeeding fairly well. and went home
Brooklyn Eagle
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14
Foolish Questions.

Father twhom Bobby has induced to take
him,-Now, Bobby, don't quite understand
this II the man who throws the ball fails to
hit the club after three trials, does that put
the umpire QUIT
Bobby-Pa, do you remember why you
SAINT me to bed last night at 7oclocki
Father-Why, n-no
Bobby-It was for asking foolish questions
New York Sun
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14

Omaha Girl-My father wants to marry
again and don't want him to.
Lawyer-He is rich, / supposed
eyes"
"Acts little crazy at times, no doubtr
"N-o."
"Be careful now This Is very important
Didn't you ever see him rave around the
room like madf"
"Only when he loses his collar button
I'm afraid that won't count Perhaps he
has softening of the brain, though, and Is
likely to squander his wealth unless put In .
lunatic asylumf'
"He talks about going into business"
"Where"
.In ST LOUIS
~ seq Mental wreck. k.n-Omaha World.
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14


An old and very wealthy man Of 81 Louis.
whose constant companion was white and
black dog. had bean in the habit Of coming
to the sub-treasury at certain periods for the
purpose Of getting the coupons OF his bonds
cashed. One day be presented himself for
that purpose. and the cashier pefused to give
him the money. The old man dmanded to
know why.
II don't know you," said the caehaer.
"But have been here before, and was
never denied, /" the man answered
The cashier looked at him q moment and
then said: "Where Is your black and white
dog that always comes with you, If you are
the same manr
The old mans eyes filed with tears as he
told the cashier that the dog was dead
swell, !" replied the cashier, ~ am sorry 10
hear that, but you'n have to bring some
body here to identify You nov. don't know
you without the dog. Chicago Mail
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14
Blood Tsint from Birth.

BooSvILLx. IyD., January 25, 1887.
shall ever praise the day that you gentle
men were born. and shall bless the day that
your meoiclne was known 20 me. haa blood
poison from birth, and so much so that ali the
doctors Of my town said / would be crippled
for life. They said I would lose my lower
limb / could not stand in my class 20 recfte
my lessons, and eleven bottles OF your Balm
cured me- sound and we'll. YOa can use my
name as you see ht. In my case. there were
knots on my shinbones large as . hens
egg. Yours. MIETLE NJ. TAxNER.
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14
EVERY NIGHT | SCRATCHED
Until the Skin WAS Rsw-Bedy Covered
with Seales like Spots Of Mortar
Cured by the Cutieurs Remedies.


am going to tell you Of the extraordinary
change your Cuticurs Remedies performed ON
ne. About the 1st Of April last noticed some
red pimplas like coming out all over my BODY.
later on. when it began TO look like spots OF
mortar spotted on. and which came on In
layers, accompanied with itching. / would
neIt Srhs NTH he scaiea Being formed nsn msap
while, were scratched OF again. In vain did
/ consult all the doctors in the country. but
without aid. After giving up ail hopes OF re-
coyery, happened TO see an advertisement
In the newspaper about your Cuticurs Rene
dies. and purchased them from my druzgist,
and obtained alm0stImmedfate relief. be-
ally Dropped of and disappeared one By one.
and have been fully cured. had tho disease
thirteen months before began taking the
Aao n lSur or ave wssns
and psoriasis. recommended the Cuticura
Remedies to all In my vicinity. and know Of
great many who have taken them. and thank
me for the knowledge Of them. especially
mothers who have babes with scsly eruptions
on their heads and bodies. cannot express
In words the thanks TO you for what the Cuti-
cura Remedies have been 20 me. My body Was
covered with scales. and WAS An awful spec
tacle 60 behold. Now my skin IL as nice and
clear ss baby's. ,on,,,
Feb. I. isss-Not trace whatsoever of the
disease from which l suffered has shown
itself since my cure. GEu. COTEf.
We cannot do justice to the esteem in which
Cuticura, the great Skin Cure, and Cuttcura.
Soap, an exquisite Skin Beapttfyer. prepared
from it. and Cu:icurx Resolveut. the new
Blood Purifier. are held By the thousands
upon thousands whose lives have been made
happy by the cure agonizing. humiliating.
itching. scaly aud pimpi7 diseases Of the skin.
scalp and blood. With loss Of hair. '''
Sold everywhere, Price. Cuticura, Soc; Soap.
25c; Resolvent. 81. Prepared by the Potter
Drug and Chemical Co., Boston. Mass. -,if
As-Send for How to Cure skin Disesses,"
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14

Luxury Loving Danghter-Oh, mamma,
the paper says at Pills, Plaster & Co.'S drug
store they are giving soda water free to all
customers
Practical Mother-How nice that Is Tel
your Auntie Sarah and Aunt Jane and
grandma and the girls to set their hats on.
Wen so around this very morning and get
n postage stamp-Omaha World
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14

metropolitan Editor-Write an able article
carefully reviewing the topography and pop
ulation Of Central Africa, the dangers Incl
dent to travel from men and beasts, give
tho line Of Stanley's probable march and
your conclusions regarding Stanleys prob
able fata
Assistant-I don't know anything about It
"Neither does any one else. Its splendid
subject for fine writing. Omaha World
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14

unsuccessful campaign for governor Of Ohio.
The same year he was made president of the
Kentucky Railroad company.
In 1873 Mr.. Pendleton was sent to repre-
sent the state of Ohio in the United States
senate As chairman Of the committee on
civil service reform, in 1882, he introduced
resolution that instructed the committee ITO
inquire whether any attempt is being made
to levy and collect assessments for political
partisan purposes from any employe of the
government" At the expiration of his term
in the United States senate in 1855 he was
appointed by President Cleveland United
States minister to Germany. J. L 8.
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14

It was his first visit to the city. As he
stood on the curbstone shaking his sides with
laughter he was accosted BY one Of New
Haven's finest:
Whats the fun, strangeri"
"Funi Can't you see iti Just look how
that thing pointing to watering CART
leaks; why, the blame fool won't have drop
left when he gets home New Haven News.
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14
ne Tas No Horse,

She-John, don't you think the horse needs
a new harnessi Smith has an elegant one
for $50
He-Sixty dollars for a new harnessi Why,
I don't spend to exceed SIS for whole new
suit.
She-Yes, know, John; but you're nc
h0psa -Iifa
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14

Mrs. Phoebe Chesley, Peterson. Clay
county. Ohio. tells the following remsrka-
BILE story, the truth of which Is vouched for
by the residents of the town: II am 73
years old, have been troubled with kidney
complaint and lameness for many years;
could not dress myself without help. Now
l am free from all pain. and soreness. and
am able TO do all my own housework. i
owe my thanks to Electric Bitters for hav-
Ing renewed nv youth, and removed COM
pletely all disease and pain" Try bottle,
SO cents and 81. at Charles Ludlow & Co.'s
drug stDra
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14

They were enjoying some West Brighton
music.
"Phat was that song called, Dennisr she
asked
''Bedad, Mary, replied Dennis, "it's down
on the bill Of fare as an aria"
is that 50, Dennisi Faith, ond it was foine
enough to be called front door."1New
York Srn
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14
wher. the Fault Rested.

Hell was SO mortified that you should see
me fall from my bicycle, Miss Maude, but
can assure you the fault rested entirely on
the bicycle
She-Yes, for q moment, Mr.. Geetp. and
then the bicycle rested entirely on the fault
New York Sun
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14
An Unanswerable Argument.

An Cnanswerable Argument.
Blank City Child-Y You look disappointed
Omaha Child-Your ma wrote that this
was city. It isn't. It's only town
"Tisn't town; it's a city. Its names
Blink CITY, SO now there"
Don't care what its name Is. it isn't city.
See how clean and smooth the streets are II
this was city the streets would be all torn
up 30 you couldn't got around-Onaha
World.n
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14
He Wanted Peace.

Wiss-Where have you been, Georgef
Husband-l was over to Quimby's awhile
tall you never saw such q household
They quarrel like cats and doss am TOO
fond Of peace to lead such $ Life Il supper
readyf
''Not Quite
'Then why in thunder isn't III How long
does It take you to stew up little hash, any
iowi You're slower than q clock that won't
run. n--Lncoln Journal
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14

He was also for
eight years a mem
Der of the United
States house of rep
resentatiyes, from
1856 to 1865, which
took in the civil
war period While
in congress he acted
with the southern
Democratic mem
oers In 1864 be
was nominated vice
president on tie
ticket with George
B. Mcclellan. In
rGHn -. ol-
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1888-07-14

First New Yorker-See that man with the
wilted collar and that tired feeling 30 elo-
quently referred to in the patent medicine
"ada" Has he been taking. Turkish bath
with his clothes ont
Second New Yorker-Oh, no; he Is just
getting in from the country, where he has
been spending Sunday.-New York Tribune.