The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-02-12
MATTERS AND THINGS.

Written for the Sunday Journal
The Gear of all the Russias has recently ex-
lied to Siberia for conspiring against him q Mrs.
Trinltatskaja. Public sentiment ought to come
to the rescue of this unjustly sentenced victim;
no woman with name like that would have
time for anything except telling people how to
pronounce it. ~
Now that there are SO many worthy objects
for the exercise of genuine sympathy. let none
be thrown away on Mile. Senide, who recently
put her head in a tame lions mouth in Dublin.
and experienced the disagreeable surprise Of
having his leonine majestys jaws close upon it
and drag her across the cage into corner,
where. but for the speedy interference Of at
tendants. he would doubtless soon have mussed
tame lions are lions, and must
be expected to suffer occasional relapses
from nprghtness and conduct themselves
cordingly. Such nauseating sights as women
placing their heads in lions mouths or winding
live snakes around their necks and waists serve
only to entertain people of low tastes, and the
sooner such women chewed up by lions
squeezed TO death by jocular boa constructors
the better for the entire human family. Such
accidents valuable il they only serve to
deter other silly women from bringing obloquy
on the sex by embarking upon this disgusting
method of earning a livelihood.
There is a curious custom in Switzerland
which requires newly married couples to plant
trees shortly after the marriage ceremony. 1t
must be great comfort to the small boy who
is about TO get a licking to have his mother tell
him thar the switch in her hand was grown with
special reference to his particular case.
Physical culture is very popular 'fad"
among the gentler sex just now, and parlor
gymnastics, accompanied by breathing exercises,
for observation-disclosures, are practiced by many
ladies, with great zeal and fervor II You have
not been initiated. and paying q visit on q
young lady friend, you will probably be alarmed
when she straiRhtens up and begins to comfort
her features, at the same time winding ono arm
IN the air. as II turning an unseen hand-organ.
Preserve your equanimity, however, and do not
call her mother or run for q doctor; she is not
exhibiting the symptoms preparatory to epilepsy
or apoplexy-sne is merely taking q Jung
infatorn and will come around all right shortly
Then she will probably ask you if you can move
your diaphragm, aud you must promptly and
briskly reply. "Oh yes." if you do not want 10
run the risk OF dlslocating all your internal ap-
paratus under her directions. Nobody Is any
BODY, nowadays. that cannot move her dlaph-
ragm on short notice.
Saint Valentines day is impending. and every
body will be pleased, but the postman. II he is
q young man. he will cherish secret sympathy
with all seHders and recipients of tender
missives which will render him patient, toll
Grant of his heavy load. If ne il an oldish man,
however. so old that Cupid and his pranks are
considered by him gross foolishness, he vii
probably growl all through the day, aud express
himself, mentally, 1t least. one of our city
postsnen did. several years ago. His leather
bag and both arms were full Of crinkiy-looking