The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1888-09-28

every one could see that all these things
happened in obedience to the new
boarder. One by one the others start
cd from their chairs, and. Indignantly
protesting, strove to leave the room.
But each was seized, as he reached the
threshold, by what seemed to be an In
visible arm, which set him spinning
about like q dancing dervish; and at
last few out into the passage with q
shrek of horror and pain.
Assembled there, they formed sort Of
Indignation meeting, and Mr.. Brown
became spokesman.
MRS Rubicon," he began, slowly
madam! We have always been very
much pleased with our entertainment
here, but I am desired to inform you
that we find the person you have just
added to our circle most offensive. We
request he be expelled"
'Come and expel me, Brown" said
Mr.. Clawson, airily. Come and kick
me out"
Mr.. Brown did not avail himself Of
the offer, and Mrs. Rubicon spoke.
II am sure l did not ask the gentle
man to come" she said, "and GER
tainly hope he will go. And I trust he
will apologize. Perhaps it is only his
way, but we are not as well used to
electricity here as he is, and it hurts
u.s."
I'm very sorry" replied the new
boarder, gravely. "Forgive me, ladies,
and prove it by kissing me at once"
kissing you, indeed!' screamed the
ladies in chorus. But on the instant
the new boarder began a pantomime as
of one who wound large reel, and in
stantly every lady, from old Mrs.
Brown, who was seventy, to young Mrs.
Smith, who had only been married q
week. moved slowly toward him, as
though being drawn by invisible cords.
The husbands sprang forward, but
were struck by a mild sort of lightning
that seemed to start from Mr.. Clawson's
eyes.
'Help! Help!" screamed the ladies,
as they danced about the electric gen.
tleman.
But no one could help them; and at
each shrek they kissed him on his lips.
his chin, his nose, or his forhead, and
cried out that the sensation was that
of having pins and needles stuck into
their lips.
Mrs. Rubicon alone remained in her
chair.
ats shamer' she sobbed. ats
disgraceful to a gentleman of your po-
sition-a director and all"
The director grinned.
at is our way of advertising" he
said. I'VE locate a member of the
board wherever we can, and show the
family what we can do. l could strike
you all dead on the spot if chose. but
that is not desirable. I'll show you
how could do it, though. Here, Pus-
syn
A white cat, lying on the rug. ad-
vanced. expecting to be fed. Mr.. Claw
son pointed his forefinger, on which
sparkled ring. A flash of lightning
seemed to dart from the setting -every
body saw it-and pussy lay dead on the
carpet.
The ladies suddenly ceased kissing
Mr.. Clawson and sat down in chairs
about the room, finding themselves APP
parently nailed to the seats, while the
gentlemen were suddenly placed upon
their heads. and began trotting on their
hands as though they enjoyed it ex-
ceedingly, and with one accord every
bit of jewelry upon the persons Of every
woman in the room detached itself and
dropped into silk handkerchief,
which Mr.. Clawson held to receive
them; watches left their owners pock-
cts; money came spinning through the
air; and no sooner was the whole col
lection in Mr.. Clawson's possession
than it began to melt.
There, in the midst of the silk hand
kerchief, it turned into a mass OF
molten gold jewels of brilliant hues,
and evidently red-hot; and Mr.. Claw
son. placing it upon the table. began to
twist it with his fingers into long rope
or cable, while poor Mrs. Rubicon. in
terror of her life, shrieked loudly:
''Ring for the police!''
The terrible Clawson laughed.
IN ring the bells for you!" he cried;
and instantly every bell in the house
began to clang. The dinner bell jumped
about on the sideboard and joined in.
The street door-beli added its volume.
The church bells were ringing. and the
bell of an ambulance, and those OF
many fire engines changed wildly, and
voice near by seemed to say:
"Wait just another moment, driver.
I think some one is coming"
Mrs. Rubicon found that her eyes
were shut, and opened them. The bell
was really ringing. Her party-going
boarder had returned, and she had been
asleep upon the window sill, and
dreamed all that nonsense about the
Electric Boarder.-Aary Kyle Dallas, in
n T. Ledger.