The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1888-12-13
puNaENT PARAGRAPHS.


The man who said that marriage
resembles lottery labored under a
misunderstanding. When you patron
ize a lottery you have some show Of
coming out ahead. .-LincoIs Journal.
-Dudekin (who had just put on a
new suit of clothes in the shop)-
"Wait minute, I'll go over to the
bank aud get a check cashed." Tailor
(going out with him)"-Well. I'll fol-
low suit. - Washington Post.
The young wife who makes q shirt
for her dear hubby not only runs the
risk of shaking his confidence in her.
but also of losing all her former admira-
ton for him when she sees him with it
on.--lsrre Haute Ezpress.
1t is amazing how quick the bakers
find out when -four goes up, and how
awfulIy deaf and blind they are when
slump in the market knocks 81 off
the price of barrel. They must want
to make some money out OF the busi-
ness.-Detroit Free Press.
-Dutiful daughter Now, mother,
don't ask me to marry that man. i adj
mire and respect him. but / do not love
him. Practical mother-"O, that
don't matter. You won't see him often
enough to grow tired of him. He's
politician. PHILADELPHIA Record.
There ought to be a law in this
country providing that none but pretty
women should ever wear wells. Then
all the homely women would break the
| law for obvious reasons, while the
pretty women would discard thu wells
through vanity-and the eye of man
would be gratifed. Journal Of EdacG-
| ton.
Wife (reprovingly)- 1.-The great
trouble with you is, John, you buy a
good many things you don't need simply
because they are cheap. That is false
economy" Husband--"Hereis alady's
watch j bought to-day for twenty doll
lars that's worth every cent of thirty
dollars" Wife-"O. thank you, John;
why, it was real bargainr-M r
Sun.
One of the latest feats of endur-
ance is that of playing the piano for
thirty-six hours in one inning. 1t is
the player, and not the listener, who
is awarded the prize for endurance.
The listener generally becomes ex-
hausted and wants to die in the fourth
hour. = brakes Magazine.
Miss Clara (blushinge -'Do you
know. Ethel, that young Mr.. Sampson
proposed to me last night and accept
ed himpn Miss Ethel (heartily) IL
congratulate you sincerely. Clara. Mr..
Sampson is noble young man." Miss
Clara-"Do you know him wellP" Miss
Ethel-"O, yes. It was only a few
months ago that I promised to be o
sister to him. " Time.
Mother, take or send your son to
the barber when his hair needs cutting.
To be sure, he may get his little head
full of political and meteorological
chaff from the lips of the loquacious
knight of the shears and razor; but on
the other hand, the boy who habitually
has his hair cut by his mother is likely
to grow up social pariah, II, indeed,
he does not develop into red-handed
villain. -Bostos, Transcript.
I'm the course of discussion about
the Holy Writ recently overheard .
lady remarked that the Bible was .
history OF men; that her sex was rarely
and but incidentally mentioned as com
pared with the space devoted to men
81 confess" she added, that 1t strike:
me as being most singular. There
might have been more said about US.
20, don't know replied her friend
] s.The authors of the various books haa
J probably studied womaukind, an,
I knew they'd be able to speak for them
t selves Harper's BdzGr.