Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1888-07-06
FUN AND BUSINESS IN SCHOOL DIS
TRICT NO. So.
To the Editor of the EAGLE.

To the Editor of the EAGLE.
dare say there are more cranks in
school district So, Delano township, than
in any school dirtrict in the county. The
annual meeting is God-send to them, as
it gives them an opportunity to crate on
their peculiar hobbies. And, strange as
it may seem, there are as many hobbies
as there are individuals to attend the
meeting. One year ago there were two
or three meetings called for the purpose
of building new school house, and one
of the taxpayers asserted, in a speech of
80 minutes duration, that first class
school house was as necessary to the adj
vancement of pupils as a first class
teacher, and with generosity seldom
eQualled but never excelled, declared his
willingness as well as his financial ability
to build school house that would be a
credit to the district, and when finished
with all the modern improvements he
would make the district present of it.
The announcement was received with
cheers which shook the old rickety school
house three feet below its foundation,
present. When order was at length re-
stored, the public spirited o. Martinson
arose and moved resolution
the purport of which was that pauper
schools We're bad enough, but never,
never would the district accept a pauper
school house, This announcement Gre
ated a sensation, and was received In
silence, so long continued that feared
the gift of speech was suddenly with
drawn from the assembled voters. 0.
c. Daisy, who owns farm opposite Mr..
Martinson's at length arose, and in his
peculiar phraseology, moved as an
amendment that the proposed building
should be circular structure, emblem
ATTIC Of the god we worship, money.
D. a. Wilson, clerk of the district,
moved as an amendment to the amend
ment that the building should be par
alielogram. AS the amendment was
seconded the chairman asked: Are you
ready for the question? No, no, no,
came from all parts of the hall, and then
an oppressive silence again fell on the
assembled voters. The chairman de-
clared no other business could be trans
acted until this question before the meet
ing was disposed Of. None of us wished
to exhibit our ignorance by asking the
meaning of that fateful word parallelo-
gram, but an honest Englishman arose
and said: Mr.. Chairman, / dessay hello
gram is the Hunted States way of say
ing school house; is 1t: This
question saved US from being
impaled on either horn of the dilema.
The presiding officer called on Mr. Daisy
who is a graduate Of the University OF
Illinois, but he decided the best and only
use he made of all he taught in college
was to forget it as all sensible men do
quick. The clerk of the district was en-
joying the scene with ali the capabilty
of his nature when the chairman asked
him TO explain to the meeting the mean
ing of parallelogram. He arose and IN
few words declared that paraiiel0gram
was of an oblong form and instantly sat
down. Here was an explanation which
did not explain and the clerk seemed
TO believe that it was no part OF
of his duty TO furnish brains for the legal
voters of district 50. 0. Martinscn now
arose and explained with his characters
tic modesty that an oblong was figure
whose length exceeded its breadth. We
all drew breath OF relief when the ques-
ton was put and carried unanimously
that our new schoolIuaster should be
parallelogram. At the annual meeting
one week ago the assembled wisdom OF
the district voted to employ female
teacher for six months. common cling on
the second Monday of September. II
was put up job engineered by D. A.
Wilson, who has developed an overpow-
ering affinity for school teachers, and
intends, if possible, 10 emigrate TO the
state of matrimony next winter When !
the presiding officer declared that the |
vote was carried unanimously that a /
lady teacher be employed, UP jumped /
Mr.. Wilson and asked as special favor !
that he be and is empowered to hire the |
teacher. This vote was also carried /
unanimously; therefore. all lady teach |
ers who are inclined to instruct the MS
ing generation in District s. are cordially /
requested to apply personally to .. a. /