The Newberry herald and news. (Newberry, S.C.) 1884-1903, 1888-02-09
ELECTRICAL EUTHANASIA.
Bill Nye Makes Few Remarks on an
Exceedingly Popular Subject.

Finding these vital questions in
my mail yesterday, with no postage
inclosed to prepay a terse reply, |
take the liberty of holding the fol.
lowing animated conversation with
myself:
!. What do you think of the pres
ent method Of administering capital
punishment?
2. Will electricity be an improve
ment on hanging?
3. What do you think of the Gus.
tom of allowing criminals to make q
speech on the scafold?
4. Do you believe that cremation
will ever take the place of the pres
ent method of burial?
5. What are your literary habits?
/. The present method of execu'
ton is not a great success. We have
now so many styles of death by acci-
dent which excel hanging in the mat
ter of rapidity that it is strange we
do not introduce some of these meth.
DDS.
,. Electricity would be a popular
and successful style Of execution If
once introduced. In the old days Of
barbarlsm men were put in the ring
and required to fight ten.hundred"
poundlion with tin sword, the public
required the sight of blood in order
to be entirely convinced that the law
had been properly enforced. Then
no one felt perfectly satisfied with
the execution unless a ringtail tiger
from Bengal gnawed large holes in
the defendant, exposing his methods
Of digestion.
3. Now we have advanced to that
point when we are satisfied TO read
the speech of deceased. Some day
we will get where we not even crave
that. Too many people are now COM
hitting capital crimes for the pur-
pose of getting into the papers. Some
dav the gentleman who kills his par
ents because they will not pass the
molasses will not be permitted to
make a speech on the gallows. but he
will step into q little room off the
iail. sit down in q seventy-fve-dollar
scarlet plush chair, and while he is
reading the morning paper the COVER
nor will touch a small collar-button
in his office, which connects by wire
with;the plush chair, and brief au
topsy is all that will be necessary.
That element in our natures which
seems to demand dying speeches,
long black funerals, narrowing de-
tails, blood, horror, walls Of anguish,
dull tbuds, cold creepy Grape and
the sickening odor of coffin varnish
in close room is relic of the times
when we used 70 live in hollow trees
and eat acorns.
+. Cremation will some day take
the place Of the present style of burr
al, which is only polite way OF
making poor helpless remains assist
in . miserable exhibition.
). My literay methods ere simple
I Go none of my writing while under
the Influence of liquor. / state this
in order to correct wrong lmpres
sion which the public seems to have
found after reading my work.
I devote the forenoon to thought
In the afternoon / take my thinker
through the park in u perambulator
In the evening l think some more.
! eat plain food when at home, bu
soar above it while visiting others
Rather than appear rude while tn
guest of eminent people l eat tn
best of food with impunity, and &C
as though liked it. Wealthy AM
prominent people are so sensltlv
that eat what they set before IN
and say nothing.
l read all the New York papers i
the morning before rising. l the
rise, feeling refreshed, and go dow
stairs where l jerk low refrain ou
0 of the furnace. By that time the eve
0 ning papers arrive. l read theu