Morning journal and courier., 1888-10-18
QUEER.

Queer, but the sleepy student often be- cornes nap scholar.-Detroit Free Press.
 If thirteen is an unlucky number fourteen is lucky number. It's 4, 9 m S.-Boston Post.
 It is said that the yellow fever never at- tacks cigarette smoker. The yellow fever is 8 disease without single redeeming vir- tue.-Chicago Herald.
 It seems that the faith cure works both husband might fall sick and die, and away he went with typhus fever in less than four weeks.-Detroit Free Press.
 Campaign incident.-Mrs. .McFitts-"Whst hay yez in your hands, John McFitts?" MT. McFitts-"It's bananny, darlin' Casey, tn grand marshill of the toorchlight perade give borders fer the byes ter carry thin.-Ex- change.
 Democrat-sewhat has the tariff got to do with your wages, anyLowF' Stranger-''f it wasn't for the tariff I wouldn't get any wages at all." Demoorat-"Rotl Whats your business, anyhowi" Stranger-"I'm & campaign orator. Howell Citizen.
 The Chicago girl who put poison on beef steak and then fried the beefsteak is mar- to people, but it is positively fendish to fry beefsteak. A jury of dyspeptic men would probably punish both crimes very severely. Chicago News.
 s'What is your husbands businessi" asked an inquisitive woman on the train after she had exhausted all the other questions in the Yankee catechism. "Oh," said the other fession. He spends his time in minding other peoples business, too."-Somerville Journal.
 One Last Resort.-Anxious mother-"My dear, little Dicks teacher says our boy is the most phenominally bad speller she ever saw." Wise father--"Wel1, never mind. Of course, he won't do for printer or proof- reader, as we had fondly hoped, but we can make an editor of him. m."-Philadelphia Record.
 Countryman (to passenger en route for Sing Sing)-"What's them thim-i-jigs you've got on your wrists, friendi' Sing Sing pas senger-"That's little device of my own, stranger. Pm very popular candidate for office lam put them on 50 won't be shak- in hands with every Tom, Dick an Harry. Countryman-''Goshl"s- Epoch. A writer says the century plant grows as freely in Bermuda without cultivation, as mullein in New England pasture. It may be correctly inferred. therefore, that the reader of the Bermuda paper never strikes a thrilling item stating that ''Mrs. Smyth on Main street has 6 century plant in bloom. which attracts much attention. ."-Norristown Herald.
 Ae$Se | between zebra and an ostrich. The riders | were cruel in the extreme, and it was painful
 to see the stripes the zebra was compelled to | carry. The ostrich was in high feather al | first, but when the zebra came out ahead il went and buried it's head in the sand, though | perhaps if it had had more sand it might | have won the race.-Texss Siftings. A French opera manager was in despair al
 the prospect of having to produce 'L'Afri
 caine" with white negroes in the ballet, be cause the dancers refused to black their facel for fear it would injure their complexions
 He issued an order, however, that all th' young and pretty girls must color their facei
 because 1t would do them no harm, while
 the old and plain ones would be allowed tt ! appear with black faces, because they haG more need to take care of their looks. Th' I result was that every blessed one of the girl tried to get on more black than any of tn
 others, and when the ballet was on the stag | half dozen extra calciums had to be uset to keep the audience from thinking tn
 lights had all gone out.-Musical Courier.