The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-03
The psmoer.tle Mooaeh,., ,r.,.

The explanation the boy gave for digging
o zralonsly at II wOotlcliiick hole, that the
Munster was coming to dinner and the family
was ont of meat, has lErn usctl to give point
used with more effect, however, than it can
u" !" illustrate the embarrassing situation
The Democratic organs have been in since the
Republican presidential nomination was
made. Tho nr,l of campaign "mcat" was
apparent Hs soon ns the telegraph announced
thu composition Of the ticket and Il hot hunt
wis at once begun i'll every Democratic news.
l;ll@r ntli'r for any sign Of wOulchnck.
he record of General Harrison on the
Chimes" question appeared to offer the best
prospect Of finding woo,lchuck, and, accord
ingy. the furnished Democrats went for that
wnnlrl;ck hole with II zeal that put to
shame I he hoy who's" household was out
meat. Spades, shnvcls. picks und muck
rakrs We're hastily seized aud concerted ut
tack l"Tgun. For II time the fresh enrth flew
nrriily aud the workers were encouraged by
what they thought was II whisk Of the wood.
rlurk's tail ora CLEAN Of pair of ferret like
eyes. But no wno,lclurk could be found
and they, were growing weary when
they heard u merry laugh from over tho
imky mountains. and II voice say: clio
w:'mlrl,rk in that hole, boys. We're entire.
" satisfied with liarrison's record. No use
digging any longer"
So the excavation around tho Chinese
nrl"rtur" was hastily abandoned and the
Whole w"n,lrhurks hunting crowd rushed
prli-mcll for another whole which n Jealous
Democrat wit II muck rake haI uncovered.
This time the womlrliuck was going to
]" the record Harrison nude during the la-
lor rikcs of 1856. II was decided to pro.
""l more deliberately, as the tracks around
til" hole looked fresh, and success with
proper caution appeared certain.
After larnr,ily discussing inst how wood.
rlnirks dug their holes and in what direction
his one had probably burrowGl, they sta
toned q, frisky c,litor at the mouth with n
bug nn. begun to dig. hut only three
sluvrlsful of ground had been throw M when
they heard IL loud "hal,,o,' and, looking up,
there stood "Jur" Mcdonald with both
elbows resting un the top rnil of the fence
aud Il hand on each side of his mouth
There isn't any w"odrhuck in that hole,
i" shouted, "aml il there was il would be
Just ms much Democratic wuOlchuck as a
Republican wuOlrhuck. For I stood by Ben
Harrison in the lalnr troubles of 1856 ind
approve everything he did"
Will, II weary and .lisg'lstrl air the Demo.
cratic hunters turned away from their latest
s.itrh. and ;is there were no more wood
clu,h ll"i,s in sight they sat down under n
tree to rest. They are sitting there still, con.
trmlatin;, rurfully their bistercd h,n,ls, and
wil,ing the pcrsl,ir;ttinn from their brows
with English made banlanns. They are
aware that election liz coming just us certain.
~ ls the minister WAS coming to the boys
house, Int what the Democratic family il 20.
ii,;: to do for meat they don't know. There
is only one piece Of advice that can be given
them, and that is this: When you dig for
w"mlrlnrk, don't dig mt lust years wood.
chuck holcs.--plilMlelphin Press.