The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1888-06-27
BRIGHT BITS.

IT IS now that the denizen of the city leaves
| his cool city home and seeks an opportunity to
rusticate where he can communicate with
| nature-through her interpreters-b flies
and losquitoes.-Augusta (he) Journal
ANXIOUS FATHER-You are of age now and
want TO give you little pointed advice as to
how to keep money. You
Matter fact Son-But wouldn't it be proper
first to advise me how to get it?-Hdrper'S
Bazaar
SWEET GIRL GRADUATE wrote her essay in
two hours but she has employed six days on
her graduating dress, and it is not finished yet
And who can blame herr The graduating dress
receives more criticism than the graduating
essay.-NoTrtstoaon Herald
AT one of the recent public school examina.
lions, among the questions asked was: with
what crime was Lord Bacon charged?" To
which the hopeful youth responded as If by in
spiration: with writing Shakespeare's plays"
Philadelphia North american
THE OLD ORDER CHANeErH "-"B y-the-by. I
wish you would get me a card for the Duchess
of Beaumorriss' dance"
III try. But you'll have to get costume
from her, or a bonnet, or something, as she only
asks her customers! "-LondOn Punch
Mrs. wEEpLy-O Henry, Henry. what would
you think if should come reeling home three
nights in the week like you do?
Mr.. W.-(Hic) Wy, m love- I'd (hic) think you
must be gettin' y liquor (hic) same placesh
y'r husban' doesh. Washington Critic
AT P1cNIc.-He with a bunch of wild flow
ers in his hand)-Ah my dear Miss Sereand.
yellow, what kind of posies will you choose?
She lin a perfect twtter)-Oh, Mr.. Smith
Oh, te, he; te, he | will choose pro-posies.
Mr. Smith sinks into the earth Washington
Critic.
SHE had promised to be a sister to him. He
thanked her coldly, but said that he already
had five sisters. why, MIR. Sampson" said
the girl. thought you were an only child" ~
am" he responded; Il meant that have five
sisters such as YOU offer TO he" and he trotted
to the door,-Ne,O York Sun.
Mr. CARNEGIE Ton the coach(-Now Mr.
Blaine. if you will permit the suggestion, think
that you will find great deal to admire in the
"Triumphant Democracy"
Mr.. aine tcoldly)-On the contrary, Mr.
Carnegie, the triumphant democracy has been
the bane of my life.-Boston Post.
"DENsrs, why don't you striker" SAN pbat
should do that for?" THE works too hard
for the pay you get The idea of going up that
ladder all day losg!" But only 20 up half
the day, sur "How can you make that ap-
pearYT because, sur, spends the other half
of it comm downn-H0iper's Bdzar.
OMAHA MAN docking over a paper)-Another
tenement house horror in New York, 1 see
New Yorker-Eh' Many lives lost?
mo, no one hurt; the fire was put out almost
as quick as it started"
Then what is the horror"
''The house is still standing. ''-Omahd World
THE New York Sun supports the St. Louis
nominations, but when Mr.. Dana is asked who
are running on the democratic ticket, he re-
plies: "Well, there's Thurman and-and- de-
clare il l haven't forgotten the other fellows
name" This shows that he doesn't labor under
the deluson that Humans the entire ticket
NorriStoLCn Herald
A PIoUs Observation-Disclosures Simpson lex.
amining q neighbours horse behind the church
sheds(-I amt a-tryin' to work up no boss
trade on the holy Sab'th 'Tain't my style o.
dom business. Sundays for reg Gus dooties
But l say, if you'll bring that thar mare O.
yourn round to-morrer mornin' I'll swap even
and throw in that old ram o. mine.-Hdrper's
Bazaar.
my SON, don't jump at conclusions when
you man going to the bank with his head
in the air and the ends of two $40 bills ostenta-
tiously sticking out between the leaves of his
bank book. He may not be going to deposit
S. 900 in 20s. He may be going to take up a 90
recording angel is listening to hear the notary
swear-Burdette.