The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1888-02-01
stms Plain Talk Fer Young Married Ps9pls
Too Early Discipline.
Training that Calls for Gaailsasss -PAraa!s
and ThsN CSildlen's Perfection.
How to Deal with the Faults of the GUNS
How Much Depends Upon the
Mother.
Written for the Sentinel.
tCopyrighted. 1sss.l

hours endeavoring to unite in some system
with which they shall feel satisfied. They
search oil old authorities, listen to the ex.
peIience and advice OF old friends, aud
when the "long expected" arrives are
nearly content with the programme they
have agreed upon to guide them and be
adhered to as, on the whole, the nearest TO
perfection Of anything they have succeeded
in cleaning. What the character of this
plan may be depends largely on the tastes,
habits, dispositions, and early training of
the parents themselves. A strong, firm
character will be quite likely to find these
traits quite prominently running through
the plans adopted for the govern ment of
their children. If the wife more gently
demuTs as TO the course, it is but right that
the husbands Judgment has the deciding
voice.
IA soon as the child is old enough 10 re-
alize at all either what signs or words are
intended to convey, the father thinks thst
instantaneous, implicit obedience should
be exacted, even at the expense OF very
early, even severe, punishment. 1T is for
our child's present and future good, and
we must not hesitate, whatever may be the
pain 10 Us,n is the fathers explanation.
We have known some OF the most low
ing, devoted parents suffer almost martyr
dom themselves in their conscientious be-
lief that only severe measures could break
the child's will' and teach that quick.
strict obedience to parental authority
which the parents theory has made sbso.
luteIy necessary to insure the cailds
future good. We have seen this
belief thorOughly carried out with tie
nret children, snd the parents sad hearted
and almost despairing because their chill.
dren were constantly requiring such es.
we're discipline. Poor, mistaken parents.
never daring 20 let their love reason aEay
what they think are their conscientious
scTuples. But death az length accom-
plished what neither the pleadings Of their
own hearts nor friendly argum snt )uld
Go. A little one taken from their arms
softened the rigor of the old doctrine they
had so thoroughly believed. Another
comes, but just at the most interesting age
is removed o. death. What new light mas
come TO them from the portals OF the
grave? Almost unconsc;ously they learned
how much more quickly q gllful child can
&c ouelled by gentle, LOVING word than
by punishment and no mach, AFTER all,
of their children errors arose from igaor.
snce and not from wiliul disobedience
Other parents take an entirely f rent
view Of what they think is the proper man
sgement OF their little ones, and go just as
tar wrong, bUs IL an opposite AMI usually
fGT mcle unsafe direction. Pettjug, III
dulging, cosxing, are their ideas OF perfect
family training, and The result is their
akYl6Tsn Become tEeir masters, their
tyrants.
The first appearance of wfong-doing in a
child is an ample reason for gentle disci.
pine and for most careful training, bq.
not for alarm or anx ETY.. The earliest
faults OF children are sel6shness, fiery tenn
pers, obstinacy, falsehood, petty dishoa.
esty, aud similar evils, with which m pst
parents are familiar. But perfect children
are only seen by over-partial parental
the most dissgreesble children
one meets. The usual and most
prominent faults of childhood are those.
that disappear when the little folks grow
ont from little animals toward maturity
To be sure under the most virtuous
inauerces some children never grow out
of anlmalism, and become perfectly worth
less. while others, under the must unfav-
orable circumstances, grow up to honor
and virtue. But such cases are, what every
one knows, clearly exceptions. They do
not set aside or destroy the general truth
that children viii grow up as they are
trained 10. II is the firm belief in this
truth that canses considerations parents 81
much anxiety in rearing their childrsa,
and which tends, from the fear OF neglect
ing some duty, 10 visit the frat appearance
of evil with undue severity.
Most at those traits ia children which
causes young parents the most anxiety are
simply the animal instincts. In their esrly
form they belong to all, snd may be found
to have been given for baneficent purposes.
They are evils only when they are out of
proportion and ungoyerled by reason aud
moral sense. For instance, quick temper
lie usually hut the sign Of nervous senabil'
| itY, which takes or every Impression With
scuteness and quickness. 0bstinacy is IN
trained irmnees, and as the child goes TO-
| ward ma utity, under the right inf Licences,
| and is guided by reason, becomes decision
| Of character. Children often become deceit
| full through fear, for deceit is the p1or
| defense OF weakness, and fajsaood Is ire
| ouently not 3 love Of deceit, but the fear
| of pain or blame.
! These and other faults require watching,
most sssiduous watching, on the part Ut the
| parents, and perhaps there may be cases
when the only restraint or remedy musI
come from acute punishment. But these
are not signs of extraordinary evil or wick
edness in the nature of the child; they sian
| ply chow that with its animal body your
child has inherited animal instincts. and il
must have the assistance of your reason
and moral sense TO awaken and stimulate
its self.governing power,
Sucb faults often disffsure the first te.
or fifteen years of child's life, and tner
almost at once disappear altogether. A
the period OF puberty greet change pass
/ es over the mind. Reason takes many
steps forward; the moral sense and its as
sistauts, or auxiliaries shame aud hon0l
| receive a great impulse, and the self
governing power of child is then almos
for the first tire established, and has now
some rational and moral force OF It's OWL
to resist and oppose to these animal In
stincts. A tricky child, over whom TIT
parents have grieved and well'nigh des
paired, becomes scrupulously honest; de
| ceitful nature blossoms into simplicity an(
truthfulness, and fiery and passionate
temper is held in check with daily lncreas
ing strength and steadfastness.
In general, however, this favorable
change with increasing years Will depend
largely upon the earnest and lncessent car
| and moral influence exerted upon the chile
ali the way from early childhood to pu
berry. No parent can safely laugh at petit,
VICES In his child, and neglect them witt
the careless remark, "0h, he'll outgro'
them % Some do no donbt, outgrow these
faults without parental care aud watchtul
ness, but such cases are very rare. More
by far. will be overcome by them
In a simple way, such AS. the child ca
comprehend, it must be carefully taugh
the nature OF such vices, their evil, an
the danger sure 70 follow the indulgence
them. If no change for the better is man
esteo, parents should not be discouraged
Every month and every year L. bringin