The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-03-10
TO HAVE A BLOWOUT.

Old Abc Pelham is retired business man, having, tow years ago crowded % many rAwhiies into a corner that he was enabled by the proceeds to es- tablish himself as man of elegant leisure. Many years ago he marrie.ia a shrcwd servant girl whose strong, rcd arms assisted him in the way of house. hold economy, and whose engagements In the Kitchens Of the rich had given her an acquaintance with fashionable life--an acquaintance which now that Abc had become man of importance, could be turned to advantage.
 "l am going to have blow -out at my house," aaid old Abc upon meet ing friend tho other day tone that l think will stun tho community. I've hired the best all-round restaurant man In town to sct up tho vidulta, and have hired three of the best flddlera in the city of Chicago. That ain't all. My wife, you know, Is up to all this social business, and it's her iiee that we ought 10 have somc sort Of enter tainment, 90 have writ this here let. tor. Read It."
 He banded over the following iot- ter, addressed to Mark Twain:
 "MY DEAR SiR ;---I have seon good many of the pieces that you have had printed iii the newspapers, and hava- come to the conclusion that you'll do. Now, VIC can bc of benefit to each other. ! am going to give fecd at my house on the sixth of next month and want you to come and tickle the folks. The Andcrson's, that live Just across the street from me, give blow out the other night and had joker, and he ticklcd tho people s good deal, but want you to come down hero and lay 'cm out. believe you can do it 1T you turn yourself looss and go In like whitehead and 1 am willing to pay for it, you bet. ain't man to hang back for q few dollars when l want the folks at my house to have good time. That felier over at Anderson's sung several right funny songs, but if you'll tune yourself up I guess you can beat him and, say, how would 1t do to work few card tricks2 ! tell you that card tricks takes. Wife thinks 1t would bc good Idea to crow like rooster and chuck way down in your throat like telephone, but you can use your own pleasure about that. ] don't think it would be a had Idea to bring along pair of knocking bones. You may say what you please, but bones well knocked always cstchss people. can post you up on local gags and give you a good many other pointers that you can work In. It is my aim, yon understand, to make my blow -out lay over tho one at Ander- sons. could get the same feller they had, but that wouldn't be beat Ing them, you see. I've got . book that's pretty well sprinkled with jokes, and you might look through 1t. Understand that you are to eat and drink with the rest Of the company. I Devcr was man to discriminate sg=inst hired help. don't know whether you csn dance or not, but t strikes nc that a few jigs would come n pretty handy. Let me know what yoE'., take to come down. Under stand that ! am open handed, and that I'll pay your price. even if it's thirty doIlars."
 "Don't you think thatil fetch him7" Abe asked when his friend had fn- isbed reading the letter.
 "l don't kDow."
 "Wsil, I dc, fur I offer him his price. If he should hang out, wy, yifs shs'il try her hand. Oh, our blow out must be the boss.s