The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1888-06-07
SHARP HIS RUsINESS,

Now, that name, said the hotel clerk,
running his diamond hilted finger down
the register and pausing at the name Of
GurlprOat, that name is a fraud. That
man is travelling incog., and there is
crooked about him.
why do you think so 2 inquired a re
porter on the trail OF a fugitive item
Why do l think sol Why. Almo,t
know tin fact, do know 1t intuitiye.
ly. 1t is my business to be familiar with
names and the derivation and national
ity OF them, Now, there is no such
name as Gurlproat. II is neither Eng
lish, Irish, Scotch, German, Swedisb.
WEIGH, French, Spanish. Italian, Rus.
sian, Malay, Greek. Norwegian nor
Choctaw. 1t is a machine name. mann
featured for an emergency, something
like the characters in Dickens's novels
the Veneerings. Pogsnaps, Weggs. Dor.
rits, Jaggers, Nicklebys and Chuzzle.
wits. l am obliged, you know, 10 be
sharp in my business
Are there any other earmarks nv
which you know this man to be fraud y
We'll. yes; have spoken to him on
several occasions, calling him by name
on every occasion he
has appeared to fail to recognize the
name as at all familiar, and / have to
repeat it. l tell you he is a sIy fakir
from Flytown. He Is a queer, and you
can bet high on that
Now, there Is a man. continued the
hotel clerk, pointing to another speci-
men of square-toed caligraphy: that
man Jones, there-A. Q. Jones-he,s ali
o, K. There is no subterfuge about him.
He n and nIupba L
sack, deposits roll of bills in the saie.
calls for stylus, indorses the register,
and there you have it fat-footed-A. o.
Jones; 80, 900 in his roll of bills in the
safe. He is man who will do to tie up
to. We have to be good judges of hu-
man nature IN this business, tell you,
and are obliged 10 be teetotally and strict
" sharp, But Jones is solid with this
house. He has been here a week now.
and have advanced him $3.50 or 5000
on his ROLL
You are sure the roll contains money.
are your inquired the reporter, care
lessly.
'surel Why. it is an express package
sealed, and the amount marked on the
corner. Guests often leave them with
us for security
Il should want to know it was all right
before loaned money on it, pursued
the reporter.
That's where you would fool vour-
self. That's where you would insult
guests and drive trade away. But,-the
sharp clerk spoke this little unea.ilv-
just to show you what a square man
Jones is, I'll send up bis BILL And the
clerk proceeded to sound the loud tim.
brel which summoned a bellboy,
Here, run up to So with this, said the
clerk.
While the bellboy was on his mission
the suspicious Gurlproat came up To the
Office to settle his bill
That's him--Gurlproat, said the clark
forming the words without uttering a
sound. Eight dollars and a Quarter
two days and half
'Hey| said the despised Gurlproat.
Two days and half-eight dollars
and a quarter answered the clerk,
winklng at the reporter.
Eight dollars
Eighth
And a quarter
All right--correct,' and Mr.. Gurlproat
rendered a $40 bill. The sharp clerk
spent ten minutes critically examining
and testing the same. While dong 80
the suspected guest observed:
If Colonel James Gurlproat of Mont.
gomery, Alabama, calls for me, please
tell him | have gone to Washington
The hotel clerk looked suddenly nm
and his face was like circus poster
gilded with the rays of sunset.
Are you Congressman Gurlproat of
Alabama he inquired.
'HeyT
Are you Congressman GurIproat OF
AlabamaT
No, am his brother. am Judoe
Gurlproat, formerly Of the supreme
bench
He had his change, and in another in.
slant the porter was obsequiously escort.
ing him out to a carriage.
Why. exclaimed the clerk, it's sin
gular l happened to forget that Curl.
proat family of Montgomery. 1t lust
beats all. Funny, isn't 1t. when you
miss mans name
The bellboy returned at this interest
ing juncture of the proceedings with the
startling information that A. Q Jones
had skipped, bag and baggage, hook,
line and sinker. foot, horse and dra-
goons. The clerk turned white, and his
fingers shook like a splinter on a rail in
the wind as he suddenly went down into
the safe after the express package, He
ished it up. tore off the end and pro.
ceeded to shake out-a generous wad of
newspaper clippings, some of it gems OF
poetry, the balance choice extracts from
the humorous papers and medical read
ing notices.-[Texas Siftings.