Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1888-03-01
Some Virginia Yarns.

In the mountains of Virginia and
West Virginia after the war, story
telling was the one feast of reason and
intellectual pastime. The mountain
GERS were never an educated race.
During the period of the rebellion they
were cut off entirely from all newspa-
pers, books and periodicals. They
knew absolutely nothing of what was
going on in the world. They lived in
little circle by themselves. When
they got together the man who could
| tnll the host e+n1.n was the nolsnowl-
edged leader. Wit was cultivated by
personal encounter in the country
| store, in the tavern bar-room, and be-
fore the great freplaces in the cabins.
One of the characters of the decade
after the war, about whom West Yir-
ginians occasionally talk, was GER
tain Capt. Mosier. His fund of stories
never ran out. A friend said to him:
Captain, if you were educated YOU
would be big man" Said the cap
tain: Yes, and if ] had lived in deep
water | would have been a whale"
The story is told of Capt. Mosier
that on one occasion he had been i'm
bibing at the country tavern to an eX-
jent that gave unsteadiness to his To-
;omotiOn. 1t was a stormy night, and
terrible thunder-shower was in pro-
gress as he started for home. His
pathway lay up the mountain and
across Il deep gorge, over slender
bridge, beneath which ran turbulent
mountain stream, swollen by the fall
ing rain. The captain had struggled
along to this point with difficulty.
When he reached the bridge he threw
himself down on all tours and began
to creep across the narrow structure.
The flashes of lightning gave him &C.
casional views of the path across, and
he waited for these flashes before maxi
ing any advances. His crossing was
thus made by stages. Just after
binding flash of lightning he lost his
hold and fell into the stream. 1t was
terrible plunge, and the chances for
his life were extremely doubtful.
Some of his companions who had fol-
lowed him from the tavern heard MS
cry as he struck the water. They
plunged into the gorge in spite of the
Danger, and found him clinging to a
rock below the bridge. AS they pulled
him out of the water, battered,
drenched, and badly scared, he gasped
out protest against the thunder
storm in these words: ''Wail. if I'd a
undertaken to light a gentleman home
I'd a done the job better"
About this same captain another
story is told which does not indicate
that he was as valiant as he was hu-
morous. He lad enlisted in the con-
federate army, and his regiment was
drawn up in battle array before the
advancing hosts of the union army.
The colonel of the regiment thought it
was time to make speech, and pro-
ceeded to attempt to fire the hearts of
the rank and file by addressing them
something after this manner: Eel
lOw-soldiers of the confederate army.
The enemy are before you. The sa-
cred homes of Virginia and the graves
Of your ancestors are behind YOU.
Around your hearthstones the women
and children of Virginia are PRAYING
you to be steadfast and repel the in
vaders. The demon horde of northern
mudsills are bearing down upon Vir-
ginia. Unless checked by YOUR de-
voted and chivalrous efforts they will
rayage your plantations, rob YOUR
granaries, burn your barns, and pill
age your houses" When the colonel
had reached this point in his address
the brave Capt. Mosier called out as
ne shifted his action to the words, and
started on a run to the rear: .'If all
these things are threatening my plan
tatlon am going right home to see
about it. And he went.-New York
ITI6uHe.