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The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1888-06-23
Single Copies S Cents.


ne Abae Report
A citizen of slow step and melanchol,
look entered the Woodbridge Street Station
Detroit, recently, and said he would like :,
make report.
"on what?" queried the Sergeant.
"On matter which happened at my
house an hour ago."
every we'll"
81 had loaded revolver lying on a shell
in the closet" continued the man. "Gol
that down."
Yes"
MY wife's mother, who has been liv-
ing with us for year past, went into the
closet to look after something"
"Ah She didp see"
"And in paving around on the shelf she
knocked the revolver to the foor."
"Just like womanP 1t was exploded,
OF courseP"
eyes, sir"
"And the bullet entered her leg9'
mo, sir"
"Hor ankleP''
mo, SIR"
"Went into her foot then2'
''No, sir; It never touched her at all.
'It didn'tP Well, that's very queer.
What did you want to report about it?''
"Why, that 1t never touched her. can't
understand it,"
The Sergeant laid down his pen and
looked at the man a long time. Then he
rose and took him by the arm ana walked
him out doors and headed him down the
street.
Cant help It," said the man as he
buttored his coat. "That bullet never
touched her, and l can walk her down
here TO prove itp'
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1888-06-23
THE SHADOW OF HERSELF.

Down TO the orchard spring she came.
Many a golden year ago:
The morning skies were all afame,
The gnarled old apple-trees ablow:
They pelted her with rosy snow,
The willful. wild mischievOuS elf
AS, stopping TO the dimpling pool.
She laughed to see, amid the cool
Green reeds, the image of herself.
Far on the homestead orchards lay;
The grasses cllrled with summer heat,
As down she crowded city-way,
stunned with the noises of the street
She came, with tired, unwilling feet
THE toll and moil for fame and pelf
Have dulled the rose of youth, alasl'
She sighed, as in neighboring glass
She saw the specter OF herself
The winter skies ara bleak and gray:
A tang of frost is in the air;
And there are hints of snow to-day
Amid the darkness Of her hair
And her young hopes and fancies fair
Are laid on some forgotten shelf.
And through a mist she seems to gaze
AT this dim ghost Of other days.
The fading shadow of herself.
Where are the laughing starry ewes,
The dimpled bloom, the girlish?
Than Times deeper etching hes
Upon the sad, impassive face.
So lay the picture Oh the shelf:
The pale estray no one will miss,
Since there are brighter things than this
i.sl1 81. 49,. 4
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1888-06-23

The harvest of useful labor is less ex-
hsusting in the long run than exciting
pleasures, as mcst of the deyotees in middle
life sadly confess.
If good people would but make good
ness agreeable, and smile instead Of frown-
ing In their virture, many would they gain
to the good cause
-Unbidden guests are welcomest when
they are gone.
The choir organ should always be dis
tinguished by its high moral tone.
Milk has so little 70 do with the milch
COW that distinction is made in the SPELL
ing.
What an immense town must be Parts
Unknown, Ontario, Canada. People keep
going there.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1888-06-23

Don't be fooll" she said, with a snap,
TO her husband. "Why didn't you tell ME
that when asked you to marry me9" he
replied.
The Thanksgiving turkey in Paris was
eaten without GreYy last year.
Laws are not made like twigs or nets,
to catch everything that toucheth them /;
but rather like ea-marks, 10 guide from
shlpwreck the ignorant passenger.
"A good man is the Sesti friend, and
therefore is first to be chosen, longest to be
retained, and, indeed, never to be parted
with, unless he ceases TO be that for which
was chosen.
The young and middled-aged are fire.
quently filled with discomfort aud rail
against life; but seldom is this the case
with these who are full OF years snd the
wisdom of age. They have been SO long
endowed with life, aud II has taught aud
is teaching them so many lessons, that they
cannot complain of IL, still less condemn.
"A young woman who married one
/ legged man says IL doesn't take much TO
make her husband hoppiug mad.
One Of the western ranches is owned
and managed by a woman. She is probab-
" the cow-belle Of the west.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1888-06-23
The Verdict unanimous.

w. d. Suit, Druggist, Bippus, Ind, 81.
can recommend Electric Bitters as the beat
remedy. Every bottle sold has given relief
in every case. One man took six bottles, and
was cured of Rheumatism Of 10 years stand
ing" Abraham Hare, druggist, Relyille,
Ohio, affirms: "The best selling medicine
have eyer handled in my 20 years expert
ence, is Electric Btters." Thousands of
Others have added their testimony, so that
the verdict is unanimous that Electric Bit
ters do cure all diseases of the Liver, Kid
teys or Blood. Ouly half dollar bot
tie at Thomas Drug Store.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1888-06-23
Raw hoisters-fresh elevator boys.

Raw hoisters-fresh elevator boys.
The bank teller's paying businss.
Mechanics say hat edged tools gel
"tired." The same may be said of q wagon
wheel.
Hell hear that our mutual friend,
Miss Elderly, has married corn doctor.
She-Yes, she has succeeded at last In
getting a man at her feet. How romantic
she is2
"A whole heaven is contained in drop
Of dew; whole soul within tear.
Ambition breaks the ties Of blood, and
fOrgets the obligations of gratitude.
The easiest thing in the world 10 And
rs fault. Even blind man can find fault.
Good qualities, though hidden, become
unveiled aud shine throughout the world.
|
They relieys instantly the pains and sore
Hcss caused by cold, damp weather. Hop
Pidsters. Use one.
-Ab exchange asks what causes boilers
to explode. Boilers explode for the sams
reason that fools can't keep their mouths
shut-becsuse they age too weak TO hold
their gas.
BE ever saving.
Preserve self-possesslOn. and DO net bs
talked ont OF conviction.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1888-06-23
Womsn In Business.

In this age of extreme activity and
wonderful development, il is a noteworthy
fact that many women have made their own
way in mercantile life, aud successfully
compete with men in many lines of bust.
ness. Women, whether they labor in the
household or in the store, are all liable TO
suffer from functional arrangements and the
care of maternity. For all troubles known
under The category Of "female weakness"
Dr.. Pierce's Favorite Prescription is tonic
and tried specific. It relieves the greatest
sufferers, and restores the patient TO vigor-
ous health and strength. 1t is the only
medicine for women, sold by druggists, under
a positive guarantee, from the manufact.
ures, that it will give satisfaction in every
case, or money will be refunded. This
guarantee has been printed on the bottle.
wrapper and faithfully carried out for many
years.
DIR. Pierce's Pellets cure constipation,
biliousness, sick headache, bilious headache,
and all arrangements Of the stomach, liver
aud bowels.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1888-06-23

Ayers Hair Vigor is universal beauii6'
or. Harmless, effective. and agreeable, it has
taken high rank among toilet articles. This
preparation causes thin and weak hair to be-
comeIabSndant, strong, and healthy, and re-
slo.S 10 gray hair its original color.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1888-06-23

AN old yarn--A new joke.
"A great snare--A big head. ~
-A"hle'-The other fellow.
Not in wsed-Grass widows.
Plain people-The carpenters.
"A shaky misunderstanding dice.
Working on shares-The barkeeper.
Signal failures The weather clerks
"A pet on the lap--Pussy at milk can.
Adam was the original dude, because
he had things down to first principles.
The difference between druggist and
pharmacien is about 200 per cent,
-Awoman's heart is like the catacombs,
capable OF housing several buried Issues.
Christopher Columbus was no painter,
but all the same he was the first landseer
of America.
"A Maryland widow set bear trap and
caught young man. We expect this will
cause n boom in bear traps. - aa
The accounts Of sickness in the country
are truly alarming, Summer relations will
do well TO remain in the city until frost.
--Gsyety is the antidote 10 gloom.
--LazinesS has ruined more talent than
activity has developed. o.aa
The right TO pay taxes has never been
denied women. s
The Widow McGuiness' pig was
hanged, drawn and qusrtered in rafns.
"A corner In honey-Behini a screen At
party with pretty girl.
Wall street men love dogs. At least
they are very fond Of pointers on the
market.
Yesterday was an of day for the Wssh-
ington ball club-the boys won game.
The Queen Of Denmark is passi0natelJ
fond of music. She's deaf; that's why,
Tariff reform in Seryia Is drifting IL
the rear. An import tax on bustles has
just been imposed by the Government Of
that nation.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1888-06-23
HOW'S
Your Liver7

Is the Oriental salutation,
knowing that good health
cannot exist without q
healthy Liver. When the
Liver is torpid the Bow
els are sluggish and con-
stipated, the food lies
in the stomach undi-
gested, poisoning the
blood; frequent headache
ensues; a feeling of lassi-
tude, dependency and
nervousness indicate how
the whole system is de-
ranged. Simmons Liver
Regulator has been the
means Of restoring more
people to health and
happiness by giving them
a healthy Liver than any
agency known on earth.
1t acts with extraor-
dinary power and efficacy.
NEVER BEEN DISAPPOINTED.
Asa general family remedy for Dyspepsi
Torpid Liver, Constipation, etc, hard
ever use anything else, and have new
been disappointed in the effect produced
IL seems to be almost perfect cure for 2
diseases Of the Stomach and Bowels.
w. ]. MCELRoY. Macon, q
Morning journal and courier., 1888-02-16
Very. Very Funny,

There are several apartment houses in
 West Forty third street, says the New York
 Sun. The other day two ladies were stand
 ing at the window of the dining room that
 looked out on the back yard of one of them.
 Suddenly one of the ladies began to laugh
 immoderately and fairly shouted: "Oh myl
 See Tatters with your new hat. He's having
 great time with it and has chewed of all the pompons." Tatters was little Skye terrier, and the young lady who was so much interested and amused at her friends mis- fortune was guest from Boston. The two ladies rushed down stairs, and the hostess | ran into the yard and rescued the bonnet from the somewhat diminutive maw of the Skye. In a moment she returned with $ smile on her face which seemed to say: sf] | don't mind bonnet or two now and then, | and frequently give Tatters one for lunch ' con-" Her friend was still in 6 paroxysm ot | mirth, but managed to stop laughing long enough to say: "Its too bad, dear, and you only got your hat yesterday; but Tat
 ters did look too funny for anything" | "Yes, dear, Tatters is 8 funny little dog, | replied the hostes, "but that wasn't my hat | it was your best that you wore to the
 theater last evening. Isn't it too funny fol anythinga'
 1 An east wind direct from her own deal Hub couldn't have frozen the smile on tho | lips of the Boston girl any quicker thar | that simple exclamation did. 'sThe horri6 I little creature" she cried, s'I don't under stand how you can bear to have him around. | You needn't laugh either. I don't see any, 1 thing funny about the occurrence"
Morning journal and courier., 1888-02-16

hunters started out with the object of killing ss many of the "bess stallions" as possible. In ten days hunt they managed to kill just one horse. The wild horses of Nevada average about 800 pounds weight, and when caught are about the most ugly beast alive. But if they can be thoroughly subdued and broken they make the most serviceable and hardy horses imaginable.
 Michigan has high license and local op- tion. It leviss upon all manufacturers of Intoxicating and spirituous liquors and upon all dealers doing both wholesale and retail trade in the same tax of $500 year; upon wholesale dealers in such liquors $500, and upon retail dealers in the same $500; upon manufacturers of malt or brewed liquors only $65, and upon all dealers in malt or brewed liquor only $500. The governor of the State writes as follows to the New York Evening Post: Our old tax law has been mea- surably successful. It has driven the saloon out of the rural districts and reduced the number in the cities and villages. In 1878 the tax reported to the auditor general was $373, ,416. %. and the number of dealers 1, ,203. In 1886 the amount of tax was $1, ,1S6, ,366 95, and the number of dealers 4,759 Previous to the passage of the act there were many more saloons, but we cannot readily state the number Ten counties have voted on the question of local option, in all of which the decision has been against the traffic, gener- ally by good majorities. Ten more will soon vote, with probably the same result.
Morning journal and courier., 1888-02-16
We Amt Ne Denimens.


 Not far from Auburn, N. Y., is 8 little hamlet known to fame as Bear Swamp. The Swampers are ordinarily 8 sober and we'll behaved people, but now and again, when they visit Auburn, veritable metropolis to them, the opportunities for dissipation which it offers prove too much for them and they come to grief Such an incident happened few years back, when friend was editing one of Auburn's dsilies. The Swamper came to town, got overtaken and was put into the lookup. There was local para graph about it headed "A Denizen of Bear Swamp in Trouble, but the name was con- siderately suppressed. A few days after one of the leading citizens of Bear Swamp came to the office full of wrath and with blood in his eye. He demanded to see the editor HWas it you wrote thata' he yelled 'sIt was" meekly replied the editor ''It was, was it? You wrote that, did yous I want you to know that it's an insult to every man in Bear Swamp. We ain't no denizens." And he marched off in high dudgeon, lsav- ing the editor to wonder, as he does to this day, what meaning the inhabitants of Bear Swamp attach to the word 'sdenizsn."
Morning journal and courier., 1888-02-16
MARRYING FeR MONEY.
What 1t Costs, and what is Gained b

What 1t Costs, and What is Gained by
 1t.
 Who ever saw an heiress to whom the dread of being married for her money was the fretting pea under her 14 feather bedst writes Marian Harland The yellow refec- tion of virgin gold becomes her as ornaments the bride. She values her possessions as inher- ent, not extrinsic charms. She knows as we'll as you and I that rich girl never lacks for suitors, and she is grateful to a benignant providence for making her future sure and bright
 One of the vainsst women ever knew DOT tioned off her handsome, obsequious lord, month by month-so much for cigars, so much for horses, so much for tailors' bills, so much for sundries-and 80 far from being ashamed of the one-sided copartnership, re- minded him of it in playful threatening when others were by in such terms as:
 "Don't be saucy, my love, or will stop your allowance' Or, "Dearl dear! what ex- pensive luxuries husbands arel Here E pay day again!'
 She had her fatterers and court, for she was pretty, fippant, lavish and rich-and in society! Her money was but one element of her power, as essentially part of the wo- man who attracted and won her impecunious Adonis as were her conversational gifts and | fine eyes. The conscious possession of ! wealth imparts sense of mastery that in- | toxicates steadier brains than hers. Admitting all this, as the candid observer of soeiety's ways of reasoning and action must, there is an ugly substratum of truth, realistic and stubborn, that thrusts up 8 granite shoulder through sophistical froth and sparkle. Let the woman who has a prospect of marrying we'll, accord- | ing to the definition already given, denude her betrothed of the golden fleece draping his moral and mental being; put behind her the visions of "houses and vineyards, gardens and orchards and pools of water Represented by Saratoga and Baden -Baden), silver and gold, men singers and women singers G. G., the German and French opera}, great possessions of great and small cattle Thoroughbred horses and poodles), all the peculiar treasures of kings and of the provinces" l" and ask herself as ln the honest hour of death: "Would become | this mans wife for better and for worse, for richer and for poorer, in sickness and ir health, through good report and evil report until death do us part if he had none of these thingsa If in their place he could offer me only heart full of love, pair of hands able
 and ready to do battle with fortune for my sake, what would be the answer of my hear ! at the altar?"
 If she answers HNo," with or against hel
 will, she sins in marrying him. When sh' takes the irrevocable vows upon her she per jures herself in the sight of holy God ant
 pure angels; is sold, body and soul, to lift
 as degrading, as surely subversive of modest. and morality as is that of the beautiful slsv, in a Turkish maPkat
Morning journal and courier., 1888-02-16
1r,5 @nnds.
Howe & StGtsOl
BARGAINS FOR FEBRUARY.

Black Silks at 8ec, $1, $1.1o, $1.15, SIPS and $I.5o. These Silks are all warranted not to crack. Please examine, get samples and compare with other makes.
 Black Silk Velvets, 22 inches wide, at $I.25, $I.5o and $1.75 yard-just soc yard under price.
 One-case Spring Dress Goods just received at soc per yard. Cloths are all wool and the styles are excellent.
 FRENCH SATEENS are selling freely. We have just opened another lot of superior styles, made by the best manu- lecturers. These Sateens are our direct importation, and many of the choicest patterns cannot be found elsewhere.
 Bargains in our Cotton Un- derwear Department proved great success last week. In ad- dition to the big values offered we shall sell TO dozen Ladies Ladies Chemises with embroid- cred yoke, handsomely trimmed with Hamburg edge, at soc. Would really be cheap at CSC.
 Also 20 dozen Night Robes, handsomely trimmed with en- broideries and lace, at 75c. These Robes are made from good muslins, and would sell easily at 95c.
 SO dozen H. & s. Unlaun- dried Shirts just received at soc each. These Shirts are made for us. They are two inches longer than Ready-Made Shirts, and we think are better in every way than any SOC shirt to be found elsewhere.
Morning journal and courier., 1888-02-16
Thursday, February I6. 1888.
THE WINE AND SPIRIT TRUST
 The Wine and Spirit Distillers' trust is al

FHE WINE AND SPIRIT TRUST.
 The Wine and Spirit Distillers' trust is an affair oe some magnitude. A Boston man who is a member of the trust has been telling about it. There are in the United States seventy two distillers of high proof spirits and alcohol. Seventy of these belong to the trust. The agreement under which the dis tiIleries come into the trust is 8 lease of all distiIleries for twenty-five years and a lease of all real estate for like term at guaran- teed interest of 6 per cent. That is, the trust leases all real estate for twenty-fv years and pays per cent. upon the appraised value to the distillery company holding it. Then it takes in the distillery plants and issues script for it. The trust is modelled exactly upon the Standard Oil trust. It can neither sue nor be sued. It issues $30, ,000, ,080 par value of stock, divided into 100 share certificates, and pays monthly dividends. It is expected that the trust will pay 8 to 10 per cent upon the capital. There are enough funds on hand to pay dividend at the end of the first month. The final meeting was held 8 few days ago in Cincinnati, when all arrange ments were completed and a president and nine directors chosen. The valuations at which the distilleries are put in are, of course, above their cash price. Yet the stock is new selling at 50 cents on the dollar in the market, and $1, ,000, 900 has already changed hands.
 Of the seventy distilleries in the trust all but twelve have been shut down, and they will not run again unless an unprecedented demand comes. Says the member above re- ferred to: If we can meet the demand with six distil1eries we shall do so. The annual output of spirits under the trust will be about 50, 1000, ,000 gallons. The daily distilla- ton is now about 32.000 bushels, against 40, GOO bushels this time last year. The idea is to make the output just about equal to the demand. There is no more individual dis tillation. If want fifty barrels of spirit to- day wire the trust to load it upon the cars. I don't care where the spirit comes from. Il all has the same commercial value. To-day any man can go into the distilling business and carry his business in 8 tin box in his safe. There is an entirely new principle ob- served in the trade now. The brand is swept out of existence. A firm may have been trading on certain brands for quarter of 6 century. To-day the trade is simply in SC many barrels of trust spirits.
 It is asserted that the trust will not cause an increase in the price of spirits, but that il will be few cents gallon less, owing te economy in manufacturing. And it is moi considered immoderate to expect net pro6t of $3, ,000, 900 year to the trust.
Morning journal and courier., 1888-02-16
ga1ediCa1.
Magnetic Treatment.

DR. E. W. CLARK, the gifted magnetic healer and electric physician successfully treaSs the iot Asthma Lung Diseases, Rheumatism, Humors Of all kinds Diseases of the Eye Ear and Throat, Ner- vous Difficulties, Uterine Complaints. Female Dis eases and in fact all conditions of either sex ars, ing from impure or impovershed blood or disturbed 9 to 8 p. m. and evenings. Consultation free.
 +aAtf 10S GROWN STRRET.
Morning journal and courier., 1888-02-16

is invariably erected to the lord of the land, the tutelary spirit who is supposed to rule the household ghosts, and whose worship, no doubt, shares an antiquity as great as the i'm stitution of the game itself.
Morning journal and courier., 1888-02-16
NERVOUS DEBILITY.

Sufferers from nervous debility complain of phy- sical and nervous weakness and exhaustion; there is prostration of the physical strength tired feel ing with inclination for exeFtion, and the power to work is diminished; the patient wakes mornings tired and unrefreshed there is extreme nervous and irritable condition, dull, cloudy sensation of ten accompanied by disagreeabe feelings in the head and eyes; the thoughts wander easily, think ing and study become difficult, even reading fa- tigues the mind, making the person drowsy; there will be gradual failing of strength, and weakness and pain in the back; bad taste in the mouth ings, the vision becomes dim. the memory impaired and there is frequent dizziness; often the patient is gloomy and Respondent, and the nerves become so weakened after time that the least excitement shock will flush the face, bring tremor or trembling palpitation of the heart.
 For these symptoms Dr. Greene's Nervura Nerve Tonic, the great strengthening and invigorating of this wonderful restorative which is purely veg etable aud therefore harmless the dull eyes regain their brllancy the lines in the face disappear the pale look and hollow cheeks show renewed health and vitality, the weak and exhausted feelings give place to strength and vigor, the brain becomes Repression are lifted from the mind and perfect and permanent health is restored. It is absolute and certain specific for nervous debility. Young men with weakened nerves and exhausted vitality can regain their strength by it's It restores lost energy and invigorates the weakened vital powers Use Dr. Greene s Nerrura Nerve Tonic and an ab- solutely certain cure will result.
 He sure aud call for Dr. Greene's Ner- vura Nerve Tonic and take MO other, as this remedy has no equal.
 PRICE, $1 PER BOTTLE.
 FOR SALE BY ALL DRUGGISTS
 Pr Greeae, the great l specialist in the treatment consulted free of charge, personally or by aif at book, Nervous Diseases and How to Cure Them $ mailed free. ff4&16
Morning journal and courier., 1888-02-16

The fire insurance companies last year col lected in Chicago $9,1s0,OoO money for pre- miums, while they paid out for fire losses 8 little over 5000, ,Oo0. At the stock yards they collected about $250, 900 for premiums and paid out over $700, ,o00 for losses.