The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1888-08-17

For where she stands no waters lave
Her pretty bathing suit.
AT eveutide when comes repose,
How changed the lovely dream,
Joud one but see her arms and nose
Ger plastered with cold cream.
Merchant Traveller.
Took OF 100 Per Cent.
"Mr. Isaacstein, love your daughter sin
cerely and long to make her my wife. May
venture to ask your permissionP
my young vriend, ven you ask Inc for my
daughters hand You ask me to make toe
great sacrifice"-
every well, Mr. Isaacstein, | will transfer
my affections elsewhere then. Good day.
Come back, my young vrend, come
back! You can have her. But, by chiminy,
you don't always get such bargains sffery
dayr'--Burlingto Free Press.
The Sign.
She has been among the lilies
Where their fragrance rises sweet,
And the air so soft and still is
Therc have strayed my darling's feet
She has been among them lately,
Where they grow 50 white and tall;
She has touched their blossoms stately,
She, the fairest flower of all
Something in her face doth show it
Breathes the tale where'e r she goes;
Shall tell you how know it,
There is yellow on her nose Life
Why He Stole.
"You were up before me about TWO weeks
ago"
Eyes, sah.n
For stealingp
Eyes, sab"
"And you were fined"
Oats So"
And here you are up again for Stealing.
What made you repeat your crimeT'
HUH How does yer 'spect me ter git
back de money paid fur de fine eff doan
steal some morer-Texas Siftings
A Seasonable Rhyme.
The apple ripens OIL the tree,
The hen brings forth her second brood,
And daily by the sounding sea
The collar willis upon the dude.
The mowers singing in the mead
The rose the air with fragrance fills,
The wild tomato runs TO seed,
The icemen send their little bills.
We daily see the yachtSman trim
Ills saucy vessels sheets and tacks;
At evening in bay windows dim
And dusky there are little smacks.
Boston Courier
The National Craze.
"Shall we 60 upi'
Eyes, we will 60 up"
mo, we will not 80 up"
"Why will we not 90 upf'
Because the elevator boy is around the
,orner to get the result of the fifth inning,
md he will not be back for quarter of an
Free Press.
Hopping at Conclusions.
If you think my legs eccentric"
Said the grasshopper TO the bee,
And my forehead queerly pointed
Where the brain box ought TO be;
That my mouth has feeble motions
Whence dark mysteries do exude,
Please 10 know | once existed
AS Pythagoreal dude" Judge.
Somewhat UnaccountabIe.
Passenger ION Pullman car nearing New
fork)-Porter, what's the matter with this
&c water, it's warmi
Porter-Warm, sah2 Oats funny put q
hunk of ice in dc filter, sab, jess befo we lef
'hicago, deed l did.-New York Sun.
Short and Sweet.
Now the seaside belle
And the ocean shore hummer
Arc becoming engaged
For the summer
Detroit Free Press
An Accommodating Young Man.
Her Father can't give her any dowry. l |
IN very poor, Mr. Browne My little all |
ont foot up to more than $500
Mr. Browue-Oh, S25, 900 is enough for US |
, begin on, Mr.. Jsmyth Hampers Bazaar.
An Even Temper.
shes the evenest temper ever you saw"
He said as he saw me vince
''She got mad once at seven years DID,
An she's stayed mad ever SINCE
Time.
In the Prophet Business.
Biff to stranger to Dingeon)-WW 1t
INF
Stranger-Don't know. Exit
Dingeon-Who was that mani
Biff - Jones, the celebrated weather
-ophet Time.
Never Too Hot.
Though men perspire and the suns adre.
And the atmosphere afame,
1t Is never too hot, by long, long shot.
For the great American game.
L-- Boston Courier.