Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1888-06-06
GOING TO MARKET.

They had just settled down to house
keeping, after pleasant little wedding
Quincy, and he was palpitating with
anxiety to help along the domestic
comfort in some way. So when she
proposed that he should go out and do
the mark citing. he acquiesced with posi-
tive enthusiasm. She gave him list of
things she wanted and he read 1t with
great care and started out with a very
domestic and virtuous feeling. He car
ried a brand new basket upon his arm
and held his memorandum in his hand
and generally assumed the dignified
mein betting man offamily and head
of a house. It actually seemed to him
that the passers-by looked at him en-
viously as he walked along, and he con-
Guided that his contentment must have
diffused itself over his face till the peo-
pie recognized the fact that it was hap
by man they saw before them.
So wrapped up in his happy thoughts
was he that he found he had walked
almost downtown before he remem-
bered his errand and its importance.
He finally found large grocery store
on one of the prominent thoroughfares
and he entered it. There is all the diff
ference In the world in grocery stores
There is the little corner grocery store
on back streets with not infrequently a
bar at the back end. There is a little
pine counter and half dozen narrow
and very dirty shelves at the back
shelves which have not been intro
duced to a feather buster for many
years. They contain half a hundred
cans of fruit and vegetables the labels to
which show the sign of age and a box of
starch in which the summer fly loves to
i
dies OF tea and prehistoric loaves of
stove polish, and, of course all grades of
sugar About the other side of the
room are flour barrels and the cask of
kerosene, which may be detected by its
odor even in this odorous apartment.
Then there is the moiasses barrel with
its dripping nose and row Of venera
BILE and besmoked hams hanging upon
the wall. In the center Of the room is
stove, NOBLE ruin of former grandeur,
and about are from two TO five chairs in
state of decay.
This Isl corner grocery. Then there
the middleclass store, with its most
varied assortment of goods and its spry
statesmen, and then, again, there is the
grand emporium, where trade only
those with long and full purses. This
SIe-dO SjdUl1S1ulOAIt, Will It's A1Cy
and its immense stock of goods, is ap-
palling to customer whose pocket has
heretofore confined him to smaller
stores. Here the statesmen never meet
you at the door. You have to search
them out and ask them as a personal ia
vor to take your order. Here you al
ways feel as if it were necessary to
double or treble your order that YOU
may escape the everlasting ridicule
which YOU know the salesman will 9TH
erwise visit upon you. Ifyou give your
customary frugal order, you must, in
deed. be we'll provided with epidermis
to withstand the look Of scathing con-
tempt which will be cast at you. An
aristocratic old clerk in the Madison
Street store had an apoplectic fit the 9TH
er day when a new customer asked him
to have a S. order of groceries de-
hvered. Well, this is a long DEPRESSION,
but
He entered one Of the larger stores
and walked down the aisle with a gen.
ial air Fortunately he met a clerk-a
great burly fellow with pencil behind
each ear-who was not like his fellows
in the place. In fact, ne was in some
respects their antithesis. He came up
to the adolescent husband and asked
with the usual ObtrusiOn of the past
tense:
Gould I do anything for you, sir ?"
"Why. yes" said the customer, with
a conversational air. Il would like to
give you little order for my wife. )"
He rather expected the clerk TO ex-
claim, What have you wife ?" but
as the clerk did nothing Of the sort, but
only sucked the end of his lead pencil,
the young man turned his attention to
the list.
es, sir; pleasant morning, sir; time
for early spring vegetables, SIR" and
the clerk rubbed his hands as if antici-
patton were soap. He had a chronic
stoop in the back from constantly agree
ing to the wishes OF his customers, and
his nose had a lump on the extreme
end which emitted a dull anthracite
glow He was in state of perennial
acquiescence, and, as the Christian
Scientists say, refused to recognize"
any negative in the English language.
Had the visitor said 'Your store is in
1ernally bad" he would still have
rubbed his hands In unctuous agreeable
less and replied: eyes. sir; that's SO,
sir; splendid weather, isn't it ? AS you
say, we make a speciality of being in
formally bad, sir. We let no one Guido
us in that line"
The gentleman, seeing that he had an
appreciatiye listener, began reading the
list.
LET me see, ;" he said, there's -four
and spices, and milk and bread. and
nutmeg and yeast, and potatoes and corn
starch, and"
Eyes, sir; how about the quantities ?"
broke in the clerk. How much flour
do you want And which kind ?'
Dear, DEAR said the new purchaser.
"Now do you know Allie with a
blushl that's my wife-Allie never said
anything about the amount | was to
get"
"Well, maybe we can tell How large
a family have you ?"