The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1888-07-24
THE MAN IN THE KITCHEN.
NJ and Mrs. Tenderlove's Experience

-.,turs last Sunday night. They don't
d .,r.. to talk much about it, aud perhaps this
,,a reason why the neighbors take delight
n Hd,scussing it. Several versions Of it are
Trent. but this account may be regarded
ssab-olu ely correct.
'[Ir and Mrs 1enderlove live in a cosy
n ,..I, fat in Harlem They don't keep any
b n.-ant bit Mrs. Tenderiove so does upon
t,r husband that she counts it a pleasure to
bousework for him. They went out for
s.rnI last Sunday evening, and after
+,,,,, some ice cream and furtively squeez-
;rr lands under the table they returned at
,t1'clock Mrs. Tenderlove exchanged her
e.-cet dress for light wrapper. Mr.. Ten
ds,Ioye sank into an easy chair and began
smoking cigar Presently he heard his
wife calling him:
Come here, darling, quickw
Mir Tenderlove is an affectionate hus
hand He didn't say "Ill be there in a
A minute" but he went to his wife at once.
She was standing in front of the kitchen
door The kitchen, it should be understood,
Kat the end of a private hall and doesn't
onon into any other room.
i"What's the matter, lovem asked Mr..
Tenderlove, solicitously,
"Whv, | can't open the kitchen door,"
"Well, I suppose it's locked"
But / didn't lock it when | went out,
and If it is locked il must be locked on the
inside"
How could it get locked on the inside"
Very WELL if some one were inside"
WHY, how ridiculous, darling; let me
Hush, I'm sure hear somebody moving
inside"
ITS your imagination, dear"
Indeed it isn't. There, don't you hear
il? Some thief has heard us coming and
shut himself in:
49, Al.
gestion made him feel queer. A man might
be inside. There was nothing Inherently
impossible about it.
well
"S-h-h; he'll hear us. Whisper"
well, what's to be done" whispered
Tenderlove.
Mrs Tenderlove had woman's fertility
of resource.
Lets pretend we had a revolver" she
said and proceeded to act upon the sug-
gestion at once by exclaiming in high
key;
''hold the door, darling, till l get your
revolver out of the bureau drawer"
"AIl right, I'll hold it," responded Ten
derlove, in tone of assumed fearlessnnss.'
And, say, bring the box of cartridges"
he added, struck by an inspiration He
took a firm hold of the door knob and
braced himself against the door. He felt
awfully lonesome when Mrs. Tenderlove
left him, but his courage revived when she
returned in half a minute bearing a poker
and an ice pick. She kept the ice pick and
gave him the poker, exclaiming with I'M
blushing mendacity:
Here's the revolver, dear; every cham
Der is loaded. I'll hold the cartridges
"Ah, exclaimed Tenderlove, as he grasped
the poker, equally unmindful of the fate of
Ananias 81 can snuff candle at twenty
PAGES with this every time"
Here his faculty of invention was ex-
hausted.
What's to be done nexta" he whispered.
Say you'll shoot if he doesn't come out"
said Mrs. Tenderlove
Shoot whats"
Anything Say it. Don't be foolish"
Still feeling that the threat was a vain
one, but unable to furnish a suggestion
himself. Tenderlove exclaimed sternly:
Open that door, you scoundrel, or Ill
shoot
1t was q critical moment. Tenderlove's
heart thumped loudly. 1t occurred to him
that if thief with genuine revolver in
his hand should open that door, he, with his
poker, would be entirely at the thief's mercy,
for bookkeeping hadn't strengthened his
arm sufficiently to enable him to strike "a
sledge-hammer blow" Therefore, he was
much relieved when half a minute went by
without the door moving, Then it occurred
to him that he wasn't playing very heroic
part.
81 guess I'd better force open that door,"
be whispered.
NO, indeed, you shan't," rejoined Mrs.
get killed. Of course the man mi inside would
have you at a disadvantage. If you go to
open that door I'll scream and wake every
body in the house"
Tenderlove was much relieved to find that
wifi dt1t TO
risk, and he Immediately grew bolder
Il don't believe that there is anybody in
there. I'm going to open that door. It's
only your imagination"
II won't let you I'll hold you, and I'll
scream" And Mrs. Tenderlove made good
the first part of her threat by Selling hold
Of the tail of his coat.
Tenderlove remembered that Hector al
lowed Achilles to chase him three times
around Troy before he would make up his
mind to fight, and yet Hector was no cow
ard. And all the soldiers were frightened
when they first went into battle. After ALL
he wasn't any worse coward than other
men. A capital idea struck him.
Let's hold a council of war"
Yes; it isn't wise to do anything rash"
They left the hall and closed the door be-
hind them.
II don't feel half as much scared now,
taid Mrs Tenderlove, land if the thief
should come out he'd only run down stairs
wish he would"
Ienderlove didn't feel half as much scared
either, but he was afraid to confess as much.
Probably the man does not live who would
lot rather lie 10 a woman than acknowledge
that he is frightened.
We'll" said Tenderlove.
We'll" SAID Mrs Tenderlove, with an in
terrogative accent.
w hats to be done~
les, that's the question. | wish he'd
come out now he's got the chance and run
away. What pity we frightened him by
talking about the revolver. But perhaps if
We keep quiet FOR few minutes he'll come
out
Silence reigned for five minutes, but there
was no movement in the kitchen. When
you can't make up your mind what you
VIII do, 1t is good thing to ascertain what
You won't do. Mrs. Tenderlove had very
definite notions on that point, and she pro-
ceeded to impart them to her spouse.
m not going to stay in this house with
man In the kitchen. And I'm not going
70 let you risk your life, my precious dar
ing, by opening that door"
There was no doubt that Mrs. Tenderlove
meant what she said. Therefore, Tender
!oye' the hypocrite, felt quite safe IN say
=, \ on are too timid, dear. don't believe
mat there is anybody in that kitchen. |
y%lSh you'd let me try that door You know
m aJnan."
IF Won do I'll srraap, that sattles II