Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1888-04-14
Written for TEE EVENING STAR.
MAKING CALLS,


THE srz. AND SHAPE OF cARDs-RrsroxDro 70 IN
vrATIoxs wAfKRISo-PLAcB KflQuYrrx-KEcEP-
IoHABLR cARDs.
| copyrighted, 1881
card should be a piece of plain white card.
board, not glazed, and the name should be en-
| graved In script Some people still cling to the
| old Roman letters, 10 old English, and now and
then to q facsimile OF the handwriting These are
not, however, In the highest fashion, which re-
duces all things to the simplest form. A ladys
card should be larger than that OF q gentleman,
and should have her full address, and also her
residence in the iefhand corner or the rfght-hand
II she prefer It. The latter is the most convenient
II she wishes TO use her visiting card as many DO,
for Invitations to 5-oclock tea. Geutlemens cards
| almost invariably have the address in the left
hand corner.
In leaving cards the lady of the house leaves her
own, her husbands, with those OF her sons and
daughters who are visiting, on families whom she
knows or wishes to know II this is first call the
civility should be returned within week. In CIV
ing an entertainment the lady incioses her hus-
bands card to all who are invited for the first
time. 1t Is equivalent to a call on his part. In
calling after dinner or q party the lady also
leaves her husbands card, as he is generally too
OuSy I'm tnlS country 10 make calls.
FIRST INVITATIONS
especially should be always courteously re-
sponded to- cards left, and proper recognition of
the civ1lity made, even II those Invited DO not
wish TO keep up the acquaintance. 1t often hap
pens TO those VINO have very large acQuatnI-
ance, ana VINO , nave ave met WIN perhaps adversely
acquaintance Let such a failure TO accept the
overture OF an acquaintance be made with the at
tentlon 10 Kindness and to the feelings Of those
who have invited you. Show them that you are
Obliged for the compliment, even II you cannot
avail yourself s s Of IT, TO return card.to say
self down snob. vulgar person. The younger
should call on the elder. The newcomer has a
responded to no one is killed or wounded. The
natural delicacy or any sensible person will pre-
vent MS intrusion upon social queen. whose
position Is so very well known TO be or the highest
that she can discern from her lofty station whom
she wishes to know ana whose visiting list Is
probably full Two persons who are on the some
social plane need never fear to "call irst" 1t is
generally regarded as compliment, and the per-
son VINO has the most is generally the
RECEPTION DAYS
The custom OF calling on all ones acquaintance
In crowded city has become an impossibility:
therefore society women have day, few recep-
ton days In month, thus seeing all their friends
once year. II II is impossible to reach them on
these occasions send card for every member OF
the family Invited and ones duty Is over for the
year. When young ladies leave their mothers
mohsr called n IN Hanp sS as sne
elderly, or Invalid, or who are disinclined for
society, leave all thiswork those who are young
American mothers retire from their social duties,
but II they DO the card Is still all-pOwerful and
leaves her card on eu s aa 1ss ne ,Se
card OF her husband or her son. II she chooses when
she asSs him TO diner. fhe card business multi
pues ltsen 50 indefinitely that some wit proposed
tnat there should be q clearing house for cards,
where Mr.. NJ rich and Mr.. Starcn could leave their
cards on each other on the first day OF the year,
ana oy THIS Interchange, managed by clerks, es-
cape the bother for tne rest Of the year. The IDEA
is good one, though unfortunately impracticabis,
as the sentiment IF personal attention fingers
LEAVING CARDS.
Cards should be left for guests visiting at house
II the lady who calls knows OF their presence This
OF course is not always possible; but If a lady Is
invited to meet stranger she should call on
or sent when people merely separate for the sum
mer. Indeed, people rarely send them even when
going 70 Europe. The bridge across the Atlantic
Is now 30 short ana SO easy that few people con-
slider IL worth mentioning that they intend TO
cross II. But they are In order II q foreigner Is
leaving the country where he has been visitor.
lady examines the cards On her hall table as
merchant reads his day-bOok or ledger. 1t Is her
and credit account IL Is her record OF social
bankruptcy or SOundnesA Some ladies have so
large an acquaintance that they go to protest at
once, and nope that by giving some large recep-
tons next winter tnat they may pay their DEBTS.
In all cases the little white messengers called
cards, are the ready money OF social intercourse
IN Europe calls are returned In twenty -four hours
There are no exceptions to this rule, and In this
country utled foreigner an OXFORD scholar or a
dipl0natiSt Is startled, shocked and offended II his
card Is not returned In twenty-four hours. Ameri-
cans should De more particular about this, IL Is
tue observance or these formalitieS which makes
large society polished and possible. Were there
no such laws society would be oyerrun by careless
men and Doors; II would relapse into savagery.
AT SUMNER REsORTs
As for water1ng-plac etiquette, 1t has never
been settled and never will be. People who know
each other VIII nod and exchange visits at neigh
boring villas and boarding houses and hotels ~
tney VISA They viii neglect TO do so IL they
choose. II stranger arrives whom one has known
it Is very proper 10 SEND card. II Mrs. suther-
land receives card from Mrs. Richardson who Is
Send one In return. She is under no ObligaIiOn 70
be intimate with Mrs Richardson, but She should
return the civity. Cards should be left in person
on hearing Of the illness or death or friend. II
there Is trouble with which one can sympatnize a
card should be sen; Immediately. Good nature ana
kindness OF heart being The foundation OF good
manners. one must endeavOr TO express these
friendly sem iments by the recognized formula of
society. When gentleman becomes engaged to
De married all his friends should leave a card on
the lady. OF course his own family will pay per
sonal visits The sooner this Is done the better
II cards are left once In the season they need not
be left again excepting after invitation to ain
ner or To Dali. IL Is not necessary to leave cards
after tea.
LENIEyr SOCIETY.
Az WoS OuCo CouSioctcu dn tntentlO08t ru0en0SS
II lady gave out that she received on Thursdavs
for people to leave a card on any other day. or n
she sent q Carl or mailed one. But society has
become more lenlent, no society leader car nos
slbly fulfill all her duties In person The Only
insult which person Is bound to resent Is the con-
slant Ignoring OF these rules A card sent by mail
Is now recognized as an attention ladies' having
found that the distances, the engagements and
the carriage hire will not permit or their making
all their calls IN person. II gentleman is asked
by lady to call upon her he should call within a
week. Men In society are SO rude sometimes that
even leaving card on their hostess This Is brutal
selfishness. When young ladies are betrOthed in
Europe the nance IL regularly introduced TO an of
his brides family by card This is not done mere
but 1t should be done. N'
Calling hours In New York are between and q
But II @ lady expressly puts "frOm to a. on her
card II would be the height OF rudeDess To caii
earlier. card should never be left by a yonn0
gentleman Tor young lady without also LEAVING
one lOr her mother or chaperOn. In Italy and
France q young man Is not permitted TO leave MS
card on young lady. Calls made on reception
day should be emphasized by leaving a card on the
hall table; none need be lett after that gentle
man need leave but two cards, be the family ever
give ball, TO invite half their frtends and To
merely send cards to the rest; 1t Is mutilated
ctytlity, ana the cards had better be left out
AFTER WEDDING.
We are often asked, "After q wedding In church
where should cards be sent?" Nowhere, until the
bride sends the number of her residence II the
father and mother have not indicated where she
shall be called On. Always, however send a card