Sharp County record., 1888-05-24
A RhCY BOOK.
Scintillfting with Sarcasm and Brtlliant
Truth.
New York Letter.


Chan. I. "Has Malaria;" goes to Florida
Chap. II. "Overworked;" goes to Europe
Chap. III. "Hls Rheumatism;" goes to Ems
Chap. ". Has row with his Doctor.
7 have read deal of sarcasm in my day
but never read anything equal to the sar-
casm contained in the above four chapterea
book, written by some anonymous. lSuS-
pect the experience portrayed is personal
one; the author intimates as much on page
81. Let me give you synopsis:
"Malaria" as it states, lis the cloak with
which superficial physicians cover up a
multitude of ill feelings which they do not
understand, and do not much care to IN
vestigate. 1t is also a cover for such dis
eases as they can not cure. When they ad-
wise their patient to travel or that he has
overworked and needs rest and IS proDaoly
suffering from malaria, 1t is a confession ol
ignorance or of inability"
"The patient goes abroad. The changers
tonic and for a time he feels better. Comes
home. Ficllle appetite, frequent headaches,
severe colds, cramps, sleeplessness, lrrlta-
bility, tired feelings, and general untitness
for business are succeeded in due time by
alarming attacks of rheumatism which filts
about his body regardless OF all human
feelings.
at is muscular-in his back. Articular
in his joints. Inhammatory, my! how he
fears it will fly to his heart!
"Now off he goes to the springs. Ihe
doctor sends him there, of course, to get
well; at the same time he does not really
want him to die on his hands!
That would hurt his business!
"Better for few days. Returns. After
q while neuralgia transfxes him. he
bloats; can not breathe; has pneumonia
can not walk; can not sleep on his left side
is fretful; very nervous and irritable; is
pale and fabby; has frequent chills and
fevers; everything about him seems to 60
wrong; becomes suspicious; musters up
courage and demands to know what is kill
ing him!
"Great heavenw he cries, "why have
you kept me so long in ignorance"
"Because, " said the doctor, ~ read your
fate five years ago. thought best to keep
you ignorant of the facts"
He dismisses his doctor, but too latel His
fortune has all gone in fees------.. =
But him, what becomes of hims
The other day well known Wall Street
banker said to me "it is really astonis hing
how prevalent bright's diseaseis becoming.
Two of my personal friends are now dying
of it, But it is not incurable | am certain,
for nv nephew was recently cured when
his physicians said recovery was impossible.
The case seems to mo to be wonderful
one." This gentleman formerly repre-
sented his government in foreign country.
He knows, appreciates and declares the
value of that preparation, because his
nephew, who is son of Danish Vice-Consul
Schmidt, was pronounced incurable when
the remedy, Warmers safe cure, was begun.
eyes" said his father, 81 was very skep-
tical, but since taking that remedy the boy
is we'll"
happen to know what it was that cured
the boy, for Genl. Christensen, of Drexel,
Morgan G. Cos, told me that it was that
wonderful remedy Warmers safe cure
Well, suspect the hero of the book cured
himself by the same means.
l can not close my notice better than by
quoting the authors advice:
eff, my friend, you have such an expert
ence as | have portrayed, do not put your
trust in physicians to the exclusion OF 9th
er remedial agencies. They have no monop-
oily over disease and l personally know that
many of them would far prefer that their
patients should go to Heaven direct from
their powerless hands than that they shoulq
be saved to earth by the use Of any "un-
authorized means"