The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1888-03-08
HUMOROUS.

Still up in arms---The infant King Of
Spain.
A draughtsman is generally a design
ing man.
Legal inconsistency-Calling forty
pages Of foolscap ''brief."
Noah's voyage is scarcely more famous
than the widows creuse.
The newest trust is honey trust.
There may be some cell about it,
though.
There are only forty-fve female law
yers in the United States, but they talk
like sixty.
Judge: Madame, what is your age'
She: Your honor, leave that to tho
mercy of the court
"Apple green will be the spring
COLOR says fashion note. 1t will also
be the summer cholera
1t now appears that the statement Of
sea captain that the Esquimaux were
dying off with scurvy was merely salt
rheumor.
Niagara landlord-You look tired and
thirsty. Won't you have glass of
water9 Cautious visitor (who has read
about the Falls)-How much is it2
There was young lady from Niger,
Who went out to ride on tiger;
They returned from the ride,
With the lady inside,
And a smile on the face of the tiger.
They have way out in Kansas OF
bringing to time unruly members OF the
legislature. Mr.. Funstan, member of
the committee on agriculture, was late
at committee meeting, and the chair
man fined him six cans of corn.
Oh no. 1 can't be your husband, Sue,
He said, as he gently kissed her,
But will be brother to you,
For I'm going to marry your sister.
"What can you tell me about Esaul'
queried the pedagogue. 'Esau," re-
sponded the youth, with the glib alac-
rity of one who feels himself, for once,
on safe ground, "Esau was writer OF
fables, who sold his copyright for bot
tie Of potash"
/ Mr.. Jinks Ito landlady)-"What kind
of duck did you say this was, Mrs.
Dinkly2' Landlady- II didn't say.
1 simply ordered duck from the
butchers" Mr.. Jiuks Struggling with
second joint)-T think he has sent
you decoy duck"
Omaha Man "Is Kansas City as full
OF real estate agents as cverl' Returned
traveller" Most of their offices are
closed" "What has become Of them~
"Well, don't know, of course, but
there is good deal Of sand baggiug
going on down there lately"
Hotel waiter-You are late for lunch,
sir. Eminent physician-Ycs, l had to
finish my magazine article on "The
Laws of Health SO as to get it into the
next mail. What have you today' '1Iot
rolls, CLANS, plum pudding, apple dump
! lings, mince pie, and fruit cake
Bring 'em all"
The Academy at Pekin has got up an
encyclopedia in 100, 900 volumes. We
don't know what happens to the Japan
csc book agent who goes around solicit
ing subscribers for an encyclopedia in
100, 900 volumes, one to be delivered
every other week, but in this country he
would be killed several ti-1es day.
Moritz Saphir, the witty Austrian
journalist, was once standing in a
crowded theatre. Some one leaned on
his back, thrusting his head over hi,
shoulder. Saphir drew out his hand.
kerchief and wiped the mans nose
violently. The latter started back.
"Oh, beg your PARDON" said saphir,
81 thought it was minc."
"Willic," said the fond mother, 81
wish you wouldn't associate so much
with Robbie Georges on. Ho is addicted
to the use of low slang" That's a
fact, mother" said the bright little boy,
with engaging frankness. 1T isn't my
fault, though. Eve tried dozen times
to give him the cold shake but the
chump won't tumble"