New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1888-04-08
MATTHEW ARNOLD.
HIS MARKED DISAPPROvAL OF TIE SOLAR
SYSTEM AND THINGS.
IAN Cnre,fned Intervieg.l


SYSTEM AND THINGS.
ian Cnuerfned Interrtsp.l
The fact that Mr.. Matthew Arnold lately furnished
The Nineteenth Century" with his candd-but by no
means candied-Opinion Of America might well have
prompted some enterprising reporter to find out how
the OF creation appeared as seen through the Same
double pessimstic lenses. But although this
is so we feel in duty bound to add that the interview
that follows, concedng that IT IS stamped with TRUTH
haa not been verified when we went to press
Reporter-Mr Arnold, would you mind telling me
how inc Sun strikes youl
A.nold-I distinctly disapprove OF the sun It's admir-
constantly Ubtrudng the fact that Is the cen
of the solar system The trouble with such people
that they glorfy the average sort OF centre never
do. J. keep my enthusiasm for the really superior
The san Is by no satisfactory planet. Either
it un1erheats or It pIostrates with what the French
distinctly dlsapprove OF the Froncl-csl a coup do
soeil Besides the does not appeal 10 the lovers
Of the beautiful. There unaesthetc spots on It's
face So while commend the for abstainng from
placing esq after its name distinctly dsapprove OF
IT,
Reporer--And tbe Moon, Mr.. Arnold
Arnold-I distinctly dsapprove of the Noon |
never could endure plagaris and Luna, as you arc
aware, shines b. reflected Light. Moonshlne is simply
feeble diuton Of sunshine have no patience with
those that gorlfy diluons. Moonshine Is responsible
for many sentimental ill-consldercd marriage for
nonsense. The ancient assertion that the moon Is
made out Of green cheese, while possibly Incorrect,
regarded specific statement of its essence, certain
ly goes to prove that Lunas origin was low. How
ever TO her praise be 1t said that she nevor tack5
Esquress to her name.
Reporter-And the Stars, Mr.. Arnold?
Arnold-I distinctly diSapprove of the Stars. They
errogatc to themselves the title of the heavenly
todes.' Why heavenly, forsOothl A true conception
OF heaven is that of state OF sublImated being rather
than high material place. Heavenly IS what heavenly
does An able apostle Of sweetness and Dcht-l VIII
not mention names-is my idea of heavenly body.
of these socaled heavenly bodies fixed. some
Of them shoot some of them affect long tails. But To
be eternally fixed like ultrac conservative. or 10
wildly shoot, amlcssly 10 swing long tail Is not
10 perform a celestial function.
Reporter-And the New Jerusalem, Mr.. Arnold!
Arnold-I distinctly dlSapproSe OF the New Jerusa-
lem 1t is given out that its streets Of gold and
ts gates Of pearl. Such things repugnant to my
ideas OF urban simplicity 1 VIII not countenance
The ornate in building material A weillad pavement
of granite blocks and gates or ironrendered secure
against by the patent McComber process-are moro
TO my taste. Furthermore dislike the name New"
Jerusalem have prejudice against the new. One
reason why decline TO condone the United States Is
because its civilization IS Leave old Greece
and old Rome and let who viii be satisfied with your
New Jerusalem aud your New-iork
Reporter-lf may further trespsSs your kind
ness, Mr. Arnold, VIII you please give me your candid
opinion OF the Four Seasons?
Arnold-I distinctly disapprove Of the Four Seasons
Spring is damp and fclo, Summer Is hot and dusty,
Autumn depresses with its tokens of decay, Winter
completes the desOlatlon. The quartete is failure
RepOrteI-What about Day and Night, Mr.. Arnold
Arnold distinctly disapprOve of both Day IS a
trhe too garsh too deficient in repose, 10 commend
itself to the artistic eye Then again It lays bare much
that were better hidden. Night, The other hand,
fs so
tuny for burglars and chicken thieves and professions
that carry malodorous torches By day long for
night by night long for day; when high strikes
l project my aspirations forward 70 the twilight.
Reporter-what is your attitude towards the North
and South Poles and the EQUATOR
Arnold distinctly disapprove Of all three They
are imaginary without being imaginative. IT, like my
self, they were imaginative without being imaginary
/ doubtless would think better of them. Poles and
Equators Ike civilization, must be regarded as fail
unless they interesting The South Pole GER
tanly not interestingly mas never inspired any great
deed Ny writing be searched I'm vain for series
OF sonnets dedicated " To the South Poe' The same
thing is true Of tho Equator As for the North Pole
It not only Is unnterostiDs, IL positive nuisance
since it IS responsible for costly expeditions whose end
is vanity frappe-vanity chilly some Of the audi.
ences that attended my lectures in America
Reporter-Mr Arnold which, pray, do You prefer
The Of the eaths surface composed OF
Water or the remaining quarter composed OF Landl
Arnold-I distinctly dsapprove Of both Water and
Land. Tho threeousrters are responsible for dire
and incurabIe aiicton known seaslckness and the
other quarter is cursed by earthquakes. The
teacherous and wet The Land being of dirt Is dirty
and 1t Is inadequstely supplied with caves that can DO
utilized as cyclone cellars. tolerate the Water
only when l am on the Land And when am being
tossed on the pillows, then only find Joy in contem-
plating real estate
Reporter-Do you indore either Time or Eternity,
Mr.. Arnold?
Arnold-I distinctly dsspprove Of both Tine and
Eternity Time, as an American poet, Longshanks or
some such name, has remarked distinctly disapprove
of Longshanks Time is neeting. And obviously that
which In its nature is feeng is not 10 be taken ser
ously by a man Of exactng stamp Eternity, on the
other hand the glang defect Of the average epic
poem-it Is too long.
Reporter-Mr. Arnold, IN a word, what is your can
did opinion OF the Heavens above the Earth beneath
the waters under tho Earth, inclusive Of their varied
contents
Arnold-The question is ratlcr ample one. And
while not attempting 10 answer IL In detail may say
that have not distinctly dsapproved of the PROPOSE
ton that whatever is is wrong.