The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1888-11-23


he was Immediately filed with an in
definable dread. She appeared to be
calm, but was deathly pale, and her
hand was cold as ice and trembled
when he touched it.
As soon ls he entered she handed
him the letter and simply said, in
cold faraway tones:
...Do you know what this means?"
He unfolded the letter with llunds
that shook il, spite IF all his efforts
at self.control. He rapidly tailght
the drift ofitscontents, and staggered
us if stricken with n blow. His eyes
were cast down, great drops of per-
spiration stood on his brow, and the
agony and helplessnpss of the man
were absolutely pitiable.
"1t is true!" she almost shrieke,l.
Great God, yes!" he answered in
thick accents, us lie smote his brow
with the palm of his right hand.
"But have mercy; let me explain!"
"Never; you're u mtnsterl"
edith, l entreat you"
''It is too late, Joe; how could you
be SO cruel? My heart is brenking!'
She flew by him with a moan, and,
flying up the stairway, sought to
hide her agony. With outstretch
arms, Williams ran into the hall aft
er her. He believed that he would
find her fainting, and he expected to
catch her falling form.
When she reached the head of the
stairs SHE turned and cried:
go, go; 1 cannot bear it longer!"
He hurried from the house and
Wandered. like one insane through, the
streets: He pissed Il sleepless night,
and rose in the morning, haggarl
and desperate. He did not care
what became Of him, and almost
hoped for death to end his misery.
Mechanically, ut II Il. m., he took
charge or train bound for New York
He was now comparatively calm, al
though it seemed as ii there were no
future for him except one of misery;
but from long habit, hc attended to
his duties we'll. Atthecdge ofthe eve
ming he stated from New York in
charge Of another train. During the
day he had resolved to end his life
His plan was to ascend to the top of
one of the cars, shortly before the
train arrived at u covered bridge,
about 80 miles out from the metro
polls, and allow himself to strike the
tU6f III the structure as the train
passed Under it.. He would bc killed
at once and his body would fall to the
ground. The verdict would be that
death was caused by an accident,
and he would escape the odium which
attaches to suicides.
In accordance with this resolve he
climbed to the top of the ear, next to
the rear one, when the train was with
in about four miles of the bridge, and
SO waited his doom.
1t was cloudy, but not intense
ly dark, IL storm was brewing
and over the intlistinct landscape,
through which the train rushed
like an unclaimed monster that
seemed to delight in newly found
freedom, there rested II portcntious
gloom: Puffs of damp aircamc from
the sea and smote the desperate
mans cheek; and he saw the faint
gleam Of IL lantern rocking from the
g,lff of some vessel that was plowing
the dark waters. Once he Thought
he heard the slow, solemn wash of
the surf; but he probably imagined
it, the cars rattling so loudly as to
drown all common noises in the
vicinity. Turning his eyes inland.
he saw the dim outlines Of wooded
hills in the distance, and the light of
lamps around which he imagined
happy families were gathered. And
yet nothing seemed real to him. and
he could scarcely believe that he was
not in ~ world where all objects we're
unsubstantial and intangible.
Everything appeared to b. fieeting
and evasive, and he h gan to think
that he himself was but a. shadow
and his previous life nothing more
than dream, the latter part of
which was an appalling nightmare.
There nre conditions of extreme
peril when the mind of IL sensitive
temperament is subject to u pllenom-
enon in which time seems to le an
initiated. 1t often occurs, we are
told, to IL person drowning, who, he
ing resllscited, have said that their
lives were brought before them as il
condensed in II panorama, as it were,
and in the few moments s0fstrangula-
all the good and i'll of thcirpast have
been flashed before them. We all
know from experience that to one
overcome by fatigue, in IL sleep ofonc
minute o dream has had existence
that called for IN hour to relate.
This is what happened to Joe while
standing upon the roof Of the c:lr; he
nwswiftIynppro,rlling the dim, huge.
form of the covered bridge that was
to be his death. His life came before
his mind as in ~ flash of lightning:
and not only We're the events crowd
ed into one horizon of his view, but
those events seemed to assume rela-
tions to each other that were not on
ly novel, but instructive to him.
Cleaning over nll was not the light
of sin, but that ofwcakncss and folly,
and. as of consequence, n power yet
left him ofretrieving himselftuggedat
his will, and urged the abandonment
of his purposcd suicide. He saw how
in his early youth he had permitted
himself to become entangled in anaf-
fair with vulgar. ignorant. and as
he now believed, Il vicious girl; how,
in a moment of generous impulse, he
had made the wretched creature his
wife; and SO, without lifting her from
degradation, had been dragged down
to abject misery. Life with her was
intolerable to both. They had scpar-
ated, although he yet supported her
in wanton extravaganza that kept
him in poverty.
This was not sin; it was folly. The
sin came in when lle caught u glimpse
of heaven on earth that might have
been, and was not. Ii was I, griev-
GUS wrong to win the affections of Il
poor girl he could never honestly
claim as his own. hatright had he
to leave his work unfinished? What
right to throw away all chance of re-
trieving, in some way. his wretcfled
past? Why not bravely live on. and
trust to the good Father of all for
the opportune redemption? Two
parts within himself seemed to con-
tend for mastery-one appealing to
his pride. the other to his better na-
ture. Pride won, and folding his
arms resolutely he awaited the horri-