Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1888-10-06
A HOJT SEIl0LD EXPERIENCE
BY MRS. ". +. ROBINSON.

ri wish you would try and get time to
fix my pants this morning" said Mr..
Jeremiah Zones, to his better half, as he
stood before the glass. leisurely drawn 9
razor across his well-lathcrcd face
"What.' asked the lady, somewhat
impatiently.
81 mercy observe. my dear, that you
would obi; ge me by mend;ng my mex
pressib:es to day resumed Mr. Jones,
stroking his smooth chin with q com
placent air a Three buttons have been
missing for as many days, aud ! really
believe there's hole in one of the
pockets, for haven't been able to keep
any change in it for Il long time" he
added, glaucing significantly toward his
wife.
"Mr. Jones, are you aware what day
of the week it is" asked the latter, with
an ominous expression of countenance.
81 have an indistinct remembrance of
attending church yesterday, and, accord
ing to the law OF rotation, it must be
Monday. Am right, my love y
''Cuite right, A;r Zones, and hope
you will conduct yourself accordingly.
DON'T trouble me with buttons, strings
aud pockets out OF order. for it is wash
ing day, and I've something else to
attend to-
''But can't Abby wash?'
Certainly she can.
''Wcl, then. don't see why you
can't do anything yon please.
at isn't to he expected that you can
,,,an oro ,.,,t III f,. tInir 1onr
sightedness in domestic matters, and I'm
afraid never W Il be; but that don't pre-
vent me from Knowing thar she will not
do it Thoroughly ualess AN near by"
''That's curious" Observed Mr.. Jones,
musingiy. why not dismiss her and
get one who will
"1he remedy is worse than the disease.
1t would only keep one unsettled all the
time, for they arc quitc alike in that re-
spect," replied The lady. In fact, it
wouldn't be mach more work to do the
wash ng myself than 10 he obliged to
overlook her every minute
"Why not try it, then: it's quite a
bill OF expense now, you know, and
/ uever looked 1T it in tina. light be-
fore.
"What cb!uscncss exclaimed Mrs.
Jones. ''At any rate. | have the
worst of it, and can do as l like, l sup
pose
'.of course, my love, of course; but it
seems to me that if you would"
81 can't--it isn't possible, Interrupted
the lady, impcrativeIy. Come, let lis
go down to breakfast.
f. Mr
sitting dubiously down to the smoked
and thick coffee, and eggs boiled to the
hardness of brickbatS But not MUIR
muir escaped him; for he lad been so re
reatcdly assured by his wife that things
could not lie pro- criy attended To on
washing mornings that lie had become
reconcilcd to what once had almost been
uncomfortable. Washing, he had been
told, was the first and most important
consideration. and if Abby Glanced to
forget the c@9s and failed to 'settle the
coffee" was she 10 be blame?
Time renders many unpleasant things
bearable, and Mr.. Jones hoped he hal be-
come as patient and sacrificing as any
one could wish: but he still cherished Il
sincere and heartfelt feelin" of thankful
ness that Monday occurred but once in
the week. His wife, though usually a
good-tempcrcd woman. was sure to be
tout of sorts on that day. the children
unusually noisy and rude, and his home
ANYTHING but attractive Mrs. Jones,
was licted with another peculiar no.
ton, and this was the imperative neces-
sity-of cleansing linen" on one pa:tic-
u,ar day, and no other. Iialn or shine,
cold or hot, sick or WE'LL this duty must
be attended to before another. TO use
her own words, ''when washing was
omitted on Monday, oue day in the week
was entirely lost, and everything be-
hiudhand"
The force of this argument Mr.. .ones
could never he brought TO admit. Upon
the very day on which the above CONVEX
sation occurred he consulted the Their
mometcr, and found the mercury two
degrees below zero. He mentioned the
fact. and mildly suggested that it might
be for the benefit of the family to change
the programme oil operations for the
day. The hint was not very graciously
received. and with a crcstfallen counte-
nance he left the house, lamenting that
washing day and its accompanying dis
comforts could not forever be abolished.
When the hour for dinner arrived,
with heavy heart and many forbod-
ings, he left his place of business and
started for home. In ortunately, some
thing attracted his attention as he COM
nenced ascending the steps in front Of
:. ring, aud prevented him from
% {. H.; that they had been recently
washed. and were now covered with a
smooth sheet OF ice; but heavy fall and
spraincd ankle made him Immediately
aware OF the fact.