Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1888-08-04


Almost everything Is to be had In tins nova
days. and now that the long-expected photograph
has actually come at last. we are going to have
timed speech as well We have been accustomed
for some years past to read in the press various
betrayals OF confidence upon this subject unau-
thorized revelations and reprehensible inuiscre.
tons, TIL our curiosity had got to be highly ex-
cited; and now, Just III time TO prevent Us getting
son mas shown himself to be perfectly successful
by being completely 'foiied." He has succeeded
In sending US his own voice Embedded in a tinroil
cylinder, which we have only to tickle with the
right kind OF needle in order to make 1t
laugh again, and even to scrape its throat
He has, indeed, not only sent US his speaking
song: 1t must, OF course, be the 'Song from over
the Sea-" which Mr.. Swinburne implored the new
some years back, when he thought bigger beer Of
whitman than he does now. And not only a song
but violin solo, and what we read OF as "duei
for duet" Is here suggested: but we prefer "duel"
as more in accord with the well-knOwn facts OF
the case. All these wondrous exhibitions Of sound
have survived the roaring OF the Atlantic waves
the ceilings OF liner captains and the groanS OF the
sick, and are now the delight OF Mr. Edisons agent
and his chosen friends In this country while more
are promised TO follow, for the delectation of the
press and the ravishment OF the people generally
Speculation Is naturally rife as to the uses to
the changes which 1t Will effect In our existing
economy. The ardent political supporter" is one
OF the first to catch on 70 tue idea. He Is reveing
In the coming opportunity Of being able to buy for
a few pence choice tin-roii Of Mr.. Gladstone or
the last published cylinder OF Lord Salisbury He
cent speeches whenever he feels his ardor wants a
nlp but he will be able to train his children and
friends In the right political path by screwing
from The fountain head. None or those now fasn-
ionable entertainments, the political .At Homes :"
win lack such grace as is TO be derived from
Instruments, emitting the valedictory mes
sages OF as many shining lights, will furnish
the delighted guests with ample entertainment
and edihcaton. The politician, no DOUBT, as well
as his supporter, has his open to the uses of
the photograph. He will only have to s.speak a
piece INTO u, bis instrument At home. and then he
my voice Is with you" he Will be able to WRITE
and nobody can deny It. This Is far more salts.
with you," as at present He will keep stock Of
prepared cylinders handy, ready for ordinary
emergencies, so that request for speech In sup.
port OF the candidate, or denouncing the other
Candidate or for encouraging the rank and ME of
the party, or for winning over the sceptical work.
ingman, can be acceded 10 by return or post. And
when he travels, he can have a cylinder ready
to speak at every railway station where there is
crowd and continue his comfortable nap while
platform speaker, TOO is ha1ling the advent of the
phonOgraph with Joy. How much that poor man
has suffered from curtailment and misrepresenta-
Will ever know but himself. No red Indian, f1ayed
and red-peppered, and broiled over slow nre, has
ever endured more This torture, thanks to the
which The ladies' have so much applauded, he viii
simply hand 10 the reporter the foil which
records 1t, and then there win be no excuse for
error.
It's to be expected also that the photograph
Will oe OF immense service to medical science
One OF the greatest penalties Of the age we live in
Is our sleepessneSs. No curt for insomnia, wheth-
er 1t be drugs or the counting OF Sheep viii be
hali SO emcaeious as that instrument. You Will
grams at the bedside, and when you cannot ssget
on" you VIII press button and set going, say,
accents falling upon the drum Of the ear in ry;h
mical cadence will be sure to produce their woted
effect and blissful state OF Inconsistencies win
ensue. II the sermon should by chance fail you
have only to get friend to tell one of his stock an
ecdotes to your machine. The anecdOte set going In
your ear and repeated with the regularity OF clock
work, will speedily reduce the most irritable
symptoms, and set you free from the world and It's
cares. The machine will also greatly relieve the
OF our most depressing tasks; not that we grudge
the labor, but we know so well that tho poor In
valid never pays the slightest attention. ana that
Shall quiet his nerves. This can be perfectly well
supplied by the photograph. The most irascible
Invalid would succumb to a few pounds weight OF
Then the photograph, by its registering powers
VIII be OF much moral service TO the community.
beat the whole band OF spinsters hollow. Take
only milo instance. We are, many OF US, at
present FAR too lax In our speech In what we term
new discovery, we shall have hardly any I'M
guarded moments to beware Of The angry man,
then, who feels that Lothing but proIane Ian
guage will suit his complaint, will be worse on
than whisky-drinker In Maine. He will hardly
know where to go for the function. He
Will De no longer safe in his own house, even II
his Wife is out. because there are the of1cial
monographs going In every room. He may shut
himself up In his own den, but unless he turns
over all the furniture, probes the walls, and puts
his head up the chimney, he cannot be sure that
there is no spy instrument present He will be no
safer In the back garden, for what looks Ike an
innocent waterfng-pot ON the gravel path, or
birds nest In the lime tree, may be only phono-
graph OF deceptive exterior. He will have TO re-
tire TO des0late common or q city church to have
his swear out. These dtnncult1es in his way would
tend greatly TO reform his manners.
Corporations do sometimes have souls after all
The New York Central Railroad refuses to allow q
restaurant in its new depot at Rochester, N Y,
You would scarcely EXPECT q railroad TO take such