The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1888-11-23
THEORY AGAINST PRACTICE.
An Instance Where Book Learning Was
Defective.


Defective.
"r'm bunged up considerable, said a red
headed young man as he stood az the foot Of
Courtlandt street, waiting for the ferry, and
| felt of the repairs which had been put
around on bis face in the way Of courtplas-
ter. I'm busted pretty unanermously, but
| guess | can hold out till strike jersey
Been in fightr asked a sympathetic by
stander.
"Naw-I didn't git started 'nough so you
could cali it fight. I've been licked though
and amt tryiu' to dodge the issue"
what got you into the troublef'
"Eigcrcation, sir-readin' when | orter
been in better business: b'lievin' lot OF
blame fool truck jes cause it was in book '
How was itf
ivy this way: You see l had one O these
| ere gymnazerum books and read IL. Says
the book like this, you see "A man with his
waist bigger round than his chest amt no
good physically That's what the book
claimed. He's li'ble TO give out at the
critical moment, says the book. And If
he's fat, went on tho book, he's dead
sure to give out at the critical min
ute, He's short winded and his muscles
is labby, says the book He amt no good on
earth, says the book awful certain, and no
man needn't be 'fraid to tackle him He's
| crmbrance on the world, says the book, and
he ort TO train and git down the size Of his
waist and boom the dermensions Of his chest
fore some small man swats him one and
walks on him. This was the idea the book
held and took it all in
Didn't the theory hold good in practiceY
al amt been able 10 see it in that light vet
come over fronAJersey this morning feelin'
pretty @. X. Ny dimensions are all right.
You can crack hIck'ry nuts on my chcst-l
amt short winded Nothing fabby 'boutm
mu scles. don't give out ut the critical mo
ment. says |. After a while | was up on
Blocker street lool,in' in n winder watchin'
Frenchman cook pan cakes on an iroa foot
stool, when long comes a policeman as big's
lold o hay tie tried 20 rSn on me by
tellin' me to move on. sized him un II
was a foot further round his waist than
'rot.nd his chest If il was an inch. He was
fat, too Consequently, says | 70 myself,
yoa're nabby and short winded, and 'bove
all, you'll funk at the critical moment. Then
says |: Old boss, dry up or III mob your
lie steps up and | sails in, dependin' on the
critical moment for him TO cave
"But be didn't do its'
"Don't know. you see; was dead at the
critical moment so couldn't tell. But have
a sneakin' lowdown notion that he didn't.
couldn't swear TO nothin', but its my 'pinion
that at the critical moment be was walkin
around on me and rcachin down and poundin'
rue with black club bout the size Of "A
bananner He may have slumped at the
critical moment, but I'd sooner think that he
was dancin' on n blasted fool about my size
durn' sev'ral very critical moments. When
come TO put on my boots which he had
pounded off n me and went and bought court
plaster by the roll like wall paper. l am
now goin' home to burn up green covered
book on physical development, and when |
git my arm out OF the sling shall go to work
again and try to forgit some things that
have read Good by. New York Tribune