davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
West Virginia Democrat. [volume] (Charles Town, W. Va.) 1885-1890, 1888-10-26
woMAN's SENSE OF HUMoR.

On the subject ofhumor we always
believe the female sex have suffered
an injustice. Nothing is more cor
mon than to hear it laid down as an
axiom that women have no sense of
humor. To accept such an accusa-
tion against sex which has pro-
duced in England alone George Eliot
Jane Austen, Mrs. Trollope, the ever
delightful Mrs. Gaskill, and may we
add Miss Broughton? is maniiestly
unfair. The fact is, women who have
a sense sense of humor for the
most part deliberately conceal it.
The negros always have theory
that monkeys can speak if they like
but decline to do so for fear of being
made to work. 1t is from very
similar reason that women decline to
be humorous. They are afraid of
being found out and made to exer
else this dangerous accomplishment.
Nothing civilized man enjoys more
than to laugh with, or less than 10
be laughed at by, pretty woman.
The fear of ridicule saved many
man from overstepping the border
line between friendship and senti
mcnt, and if Eve had had sense of
humor it may be doubted if Adam
would have had the courage TO mar
nv her, and where should we all be?
a man in love is always ridicu
lous, except Sir Charles Grandson,
and he is out of date now, and who
can blame the other sex ifthey stern
ly restrain their latent sense Of fun,
at any rate till after the honeymoon;
but l fancy If some Of those young
gentlemen who discuss their part
ners so complacently over last ci-
gar could hear the piquant comments
these demure partners interchange
in the security Of their rooms, they
would be considerably startled to
find what sense of the ludricrous
they display. 1t is matter of com
mon observation observation that
women become much more amusing
after marriage, but few have hitherto
understood the reason.
West Virginia Democrat. [volume] (Charles Town, W. Va.) 1885-1890, 1888-10-26
BY THE DAY OR THE JOB.

Somebody tells about paying men
$l.25 day last year for digging po-
tatoes. Finding that it cost at the
rate of six cents a bushel, he told
the men he would pay them five
cents per bushel to do the work.
They took the job, and dug and pit
ted one hundred bushels every day,
quitting sometimes at four o'clock.
They earned $3.50 per day. and the
employer saved 81 per day. If it
cost the men one dollar day to
live, they made above expenses six
time as much as. before. There is
nething like direct interest in the
result Of ones labor.
West Virginia Democrat. [volume] (Charles Town, W. Va.) 1885-1890, 1888-10-26
Their Business Booming.

Probably no one thing has caused
such a general revival of trade at
Frank Jones' Drug Store as their
giving away to their customers ofso
many free trial bottles OF DR.. King s
New Discovery for Consumption.
Their trade Is simply enormous in
this very valuable article from the
fact that it always cures and never
disappoints. Cough. Colds, Asthma,
Bronchitis, Group, and all throat
and lung diseases quickly cured.
Yea can test it before buying by
getting trial bottle free. large size
81. Every bottle warranted.
West Virginia Democrat. [volume] (Charles Town, W. Va.) 1885-1890, 1888-10-26
Some Startling Facts.

The official returns from Boards Of
Health show that nearly three-fourth
of all deaths are from Consumption,
when we think over this fact it is
really awful, though every case start
ed with simple cough or cold, real
ize how important it is to check this
terrible maladv which can be done
by using Puritan Cough and Con-
sumption Cure. Price 25 cents a:
c. f. Jones drug store.
West Virginia Democrat. [volume] (Charles Town, W. Va.) 1885-1890, 1888-10-26

What is this nervous trouble"
with which so many seem now to be
afflicted? If you will remember
few years ago the word Malaria was
comparatively unknown-to. day it
is as common as any word ia the
English language, yet this word
covers only the meaning Of another
word used by our forefathers in
times past. So it is with nervous
diseases, as they and Malaria are
intended to cover what our grand
fathers called Biliousness, and all
are caused by troubles that arise
from diseased condition Of the
Liver which in performing its func-
tions finding it cannot dispose OF the
bile through the ordinary channel is
compelled to pass it off through the
system, causing nervous troubles,
Malaria, Bilious Fever, etc. You
who are suffering can well appreci
ate cure. We recommend Green's
August Flower. Its cures are mar
velous. aug3 cow.
West Virginia Democrat. [volume] (Charles Town, W. Va.) 1885-1890, 1888-10-26
STANLEY IN AFRICA.

The following information about
Stanley. by one who saw him last
wear in Africa, will be read with spe-
cial interest at this time:
A despatch from Montreal, Cana
da, says: A Frenchman named Lu-
Glen Famelort, who has Travelled
thirteen years in Africa collecting
natural history objects for IL firm in
Paris, had just arrived here. In
answer to a question as to when he
last saw Stanley, he said:
Z" / saw Stanley last year. When
he reached Stanley Pool he had over
a thousand well-armed blacks in his
train, and there were three English
men with him. The blacks fear
him; they do not love him. He can
reduce to immediate obedience hun
dreds of blacks who wish to assail
him. even when he has not his little
army with him. The news coming
through the Congo district is not al
ways reliable, rs it passes through
too many mouths.
STANLEY, it appears to me from
the latest news / had from him on
leaving Africa in the beginning of
June, is pushing his way upward
through Ethiopia, and must have
found Emin Bey by this time if the
latter be alive. Natives call Stan
ley the =" Rock Breaker" He got
that name from the fact of his hav-
ing made many roads through the
rocky part of the district.
"The Congo district is a tract of
land more than one million five hun
dred thousand square miles in ex-
tent, divided into three parts, the
Portuguese, French and Free sec
tions, of which the last named is by
far the most extensive
The French portion is on the north
side of the river; the portuguese on
the south side, and narrow strip
on both sides Of it belongs to the
Free State. Only the portion OF the
Congo from the ocean to Stanley
Pool is navigable. From Managanga
to Ubaji there are many rapids and
falls, making navigation impossible.
STANLEY, on his first VOYAGE in
1872, formed the Free State Of the
Congo, which now stands under the
protectorate Of Belgium. Thele is
40 industry at all in the entire dis
trict. All business is confined to
to the exchange of produce for i'm
ports. The produce consists mostly
of ivory, rubber, palm oil, cocoanut
and orseille, sort of paint. and cof-
fee. Manchester cotton goods. rum,
gin, powder, flint lock guns, second
hand clothing and furniture, are the
principal articles of import. The
natives on the coast are really less
civilized than those of the interior,
as they fall into the vice Of drunken
ness and adopt other vices from Eu-
ropeans. Whatever the natives find
if they have not seen it before, they
adore as goods. 1t will take a long
time before the country will he open
ed up, as the lower portion of the
Congo is very unhealthy, owing to
swamps and marshes. AS to relig-
ion and morality, no family exists
among the blacks. The children are
common burden on the tribe. The
natives 90 to the meetings if they
are paid, but not generally otherwise.
The only hope of the missionaries is
through the children, whom they at
tract and educate
West Virginia Democrat. [volume] (Charles Town, W. Va.) 1885-1890, 1888-10-26
chronic Looseness Of the Bowels

Results from imperfect digestion.
The cause lies in the torpidity of
the liver. a regulator habit of body
can be secured by taking Simmons
Liver Regulator to aid digestion, to
stimulate the dull anG sluggish liver,
and rid the system of excessive and
poisonous bile. The Regulator cor
rects acidity of the stomach, cures
dyspepsia and insures regularity OF
the bowels alike free from laxity or
costiveness.
West Virginia Democrat. [volume] (Charles Town, W. Va.) 1885-1890, 1888-10-26
Bucklen' $ Arniea salve.

The best Srlve in the world for Cuts,
Bruises, Sores, Ulcers, Salt Rheum, Fe-
yer Sores, letter. Chapped Hands, Chill
blains, CorIIs, and ali Skin Eruptions,
and pOsitiv ely cures Piles, or no pay re-
quired. II is guaranteed to give perfect
SatiSfacti, IN, cr money refunded. Price
p cents ger ASx. For sale by .GeorgeT.
Light. ianl46
West Virginia Democrat. [volume] (Charles Town, W. Va.) 1885-1890, 1888-10-26
Piles! Piles! Itching Piles.

SyMPToMs-Moisture; intense itching
and singing; most at night; worse by
scratching. If allowed to continue tu-
mors form, which often bleed and ulcer
ate, becoming very sore. SwAYNE's
OINTMENT stops the itching and bleed
ing, heals liberation, and in most cases
removes the tumors. At druggists, or
by mail, for 30 cents DIR. Swavne q Son,
Philadelphia. augl7-y,
West Virginia Democrat. [volume] (Charles Town, W. Va.) 1885-1890, 1888-10-26
III want to write, nine times out

If / want to write, nine times out
of ten l rise early in the morning
and get some book which is of an ex
citing character, that is, one which
excites me to thought and feeling, as
do the writings of De Tocqueville,
Matthew Arnold and others, and /
read for half an hour. AS soon as l
begin to read / begin to feel; and
the wheels begin to turn, and the
machine begins to grind again, and
can sit down and prepare ser
mon without any trouble. During
the fifty-two years of my labor L do
not suppose there have been forty
years in which have not read books
excerpts, or something ofthat kind,
in order to get my mind started and
warmed up to its work. | put my
SELF in communication with the
thoughts, the stirring influences OF
othel persons, and / have no diff
cuity.-Christidn Union.
West Virginia Democrat. [volume] (Charles Town, W. Va.) 1885-1890, 1888-10-26

have cured Hog Cholera with
Stonebrakcr's Hog Powder. 1t is
the only positive cure and preventive
known.
J.K. MONTAGUE, Christiansburg, Va
The evening world., 1888-05-19
The BOisterOus Atlantic

10 q terror to timid ~voyagers. scarcely less on account OF
the psrls Of the deep than the almost certainty Of sea-
sickness. The beSs curative Of sal de mr In HOSTEL
TER's SroMAoH BIrTERs. which settles the stomach a.
once and prevents its disturbance. To ali travellers and
tourists. whsthsr by sea or land. u presents . happy
medium between the nAuSeous or Intellectual resources
Of the msdiune chest and the p~rOblomAtieL benefit de-
riyabls from an unmedioated alcoholic stimulAnt. no
matter how pure. The Earring Of . railroad car often
produces stomAehio disorders AKIN to that caused by tha
rolling of . ship. For this the BITTERs 10 . prompt and
certain remedy. The use OF braokish water. particularly
on long voyages in the tropics. inevitably breeds disor'
doris Of the stomach and bowels. HosTETTER's STOMACH
BIrTERB mixed with impure water nullihes It's impur-
ties. Similarly IL oounteractsm AlAriAl and other preju-
diciAl intuSno0s Of climate or atmosphere, as well 40 thu
effects Of exposure and fatigue, Use IL for kidney oom-
plants, rheumatism and debility.
The evening world., 1888-05-19

and aside from the gift itself nothing pleases
them 30 much % to feel that there 10 some
one who thinks Of them in the world outside.
This, 81 course, N implied IN the Eift.- ap
the cause"
Miss Annesley Kenealy. Mstron Of the
Nursery aud. Child's Hospital, said: Moth.
Ing could DO more acceptable here than
flowers, for we have 40 many women, who
appreciate them more than men, perhaps.
The EVENING WoRLD's mission In provid-
ing enjoyment to 30 many of these ,or crea-
lures must indeed be q pleasant onl We get
a good many presents here, but no one seems
TO think of sending flowers. The flower mis-
sions do 30 little, and cut flowers do not last
long. I hope we will get q whole lot here,
because we have $50 persons in the institu-
ton. and you may be sure that they will be
appreciated"
The Rev. Mr.. Baker, Of st. Luke's Hos
pital, approved of the idea heartily, and sug-
gested that those who are to be the chief
beneiciaries of the childrep's gifts should be
institutions which we're less favored than his
own. There were plenty of them, he said,
which would take the entire surplus of the
of the Memorial Day Committee, and more,
too, and he thought that especially the poor
people at the Charity Hospital and the Emil
grants Hospital should be generously re-.
membered in the distribution.
The evening world., 1888-05-19

wore cream colored kids, and carried q white
p-nRee-taken all in all, a fairy!
She smiled at me. and held out her hand.
I took 1t mechanically. What did this
meanr ,
She pouted-ah those cherry lips land
stamped her little No. 2 impatiently on the
You don't seem very glad to see me-" she
said, pettiRhly.
/ murmured that I was delighted--en-
tranced So / was-such visions were not of
everyday occurrence with me.
comfort Now, they told me that you
wouldn't receive me-that l would be turned
out Of DOORS"
Reptiles I" said !.
But / cams-and you're not angry :"
"Angryn
The evening world., 1888-05-19
THEY ARE SOLDIERS AND WILL OBEY.

Tho Johnston Affair in the Philadelphia Post
Can BE Easily settled.
PHILADELPHIA. May lathe point of the
general order issued on Thursday by Col. Frank j.
MaRee, Commander Of the Department Of Penn
~sylvania, G. A. R, lies In the following para
graph:
.'In all cases where posts have applied the term
members to other than the regular members OF
the post who were eligible under the rules and
regulations, chapter !, article 4, the practice must
be at once discontinued"
Gen. Magee said to-day that the practice of in
fringing the above rule had been growing apace
for some time, and It was felt thar some action
was called for in the matter. lie acknOwl-
edged tnat the action Of Baker Post. No. g.
In placing the name Of ex-Confederate Gen.
Joseph L. Johnston on the list Of contributing
members had precipitated the step he had taken in
issuing the department order.
John W. Frazier, Chairman Of the on
Contributing Membership OF K D. BAKER Post,
when interviewed on the matter last night said
course otey the order implicitly. tut the matter ID
one susceptible OF easy arrangement. The several
hundred contributing members In. Meade Post
and Post No. 2. and the many contributing mem.
bers In all other Grand Army posts In this city and
lBeWher under the order or Department Com.
msnder Magee, are simply transferred TO q
| citizens corps, and the beautiful certificates
that have been Issued TO contributing members by
the posts will have 10 be revised, and the wordi
.~citizens' corps, , or contribution,roll. inserted II
place OF contributing members"
The evening world., 1888-05-19

busted away misunderstanding a cloud of
dust, in which ] sat gazing on tie vision.
What dld all this mean 7 l consulted
Moliere, my standard authority. but Mollere
could give no explanation, Gould she be an
angel, sent to cast a ray of Light over my dis
maj path of life Perhaps but did angels
wear white nuns yelling and talk about CASH
meres and Impossible 1t must
be a dream.
Suddenly she paused and came to me
through the cloud, and held out her arms
and said
Roll up my sleeves, please. / can work
better with them up."
did roll the white sleeves up, and then
Immediately secuted the idea of its being q
dream. Gould l dream of such arms, with
Certainly mott They were rsall ! did
The evening world., 1888-05-19
THE NEW ROAD EAGERLY WATCHED.
Surveying the Proposed Route Of the Kan
sas City, III Paso and Mexican.
ESPECIAL TO THE wonLp.l

ESPECIAL TO THE woRLp.I
Ell PAso, Tex, May 10. H. L. Newman, of ST.
Louis, Vice-President OF the newly organized Kan
sas City, II Paso and Mexican Railway Company,
returned yesterday with a party from q trip over
the route of the proposed road as far as White
Oaks, N. Nj, 100 miles from Fl Paso. Among the
party were Morris X Locke, OF the firm of Morris
R. Locke Il Co., railway builders, who have con-
tracted to build the road from E Paso to White
Oaks; w. Z. Masten, OF Kansas city; j. A. Stein
burger, Of San Francisco, and others. MIR.
Locke SAID 10 THE WORLD corresporde Dent That
R~ineering work on the proposed railroad.
He said that by the terms of the contract his COM
pany must complete ten miles OF the road by Oct
20, 1888, six months from the date of the compile
ton OF n subscription OF 500, 600 bonus contributed
by citizens OF FL Paso to secure the building Of the
road. Besides the 500, 900 bonus from FL Paso and
also the right Of way and terminal facilities, Nor
rs X. Locke d Co. expect TO receive u similar
amount in county bonds from Lincoln County,
| n. NJ, through which the road will run. Although
the great majority Of the people Of the county are
said 10 favor the plan. II the bonds ace not voted
the Kansas CITY. FL Paso and Mexican Railroad
must make up the sum In some way.
1t Ii almost certain that tho Southern Pacific
Company is backing Locke 4 Co. though Mr. Lock-
refused to say SO. Every development regarding
this proposed new road Ii wsrched keenly, anc
especially by the Atkinson, Topeka and Santa F,
people, since the new road. when completed
through to Kansas City, will be much the shortes
route between Fl Paso and thar city, and will brnl
the Southern Pacific into rich territory ~neretOfor,
tributary TO the Santa Fe.
The evening world., 1888-05-19
NEWS SUMMARY.

Floquers Cabinet II defeated in the French
Senate.
Burglars rob the Port JerVs Post-omoe ana
escape on Q hand-car.
Boston is shipping big cargoes of New England
rum to the African coast
The king OF the Boston dudes marries amilion-
aires daughter on the sly.
Russia bulldozes Austria by threatening to recall
It's ambassador at Vienna
Two Harvard students are arrested for sneak
thievlng in the gymnasium
Mira. AsiaB Booth Clarke, q slater Of Edwin Booth,
dies at Bournemouth, England.
Prof virchoW's formal report saws there 10 moth
ing cancerous about the German Enperors
malady.
President j. D. Smith, of the Stock Exchange,
on his retirement from ofice II TO DO presented
with o %, 500 silver service.
The evening world., 1888-05-19
PUBLIC SCHOOL GRADUATES.
The Bright aud Lucky Pupils whe VIII
Leave Nos. 40, FL aud ga.

Leave Nos. al, ~ and Va.
The EVENING wonLp's list Of probable
graduates Of the public schools 10 being
eagerly consulted by Thousands Of interested
pupils throughout the city. To.day's list In
cludes the bright aud lucky pupils In GRAM
mar Schools 40. az and %.
Grammar School No. 40, at 81 East Thirty.
seventh street, Is presided over in the boys
department by James X. Pettigrew and IN
the girls by Miss F. +. A. Clutch. oscar
Birnbaum instructs the first grnle boys.
The boys that will most likely be graduated
this year are
Andrew j. Burns, John @. Dale, Henry II.
Frech, George Grnnthal, J; J. Hsnnlgan. Gustav
!. Keaiing, Harry Lazarus, John 4; Mcsnerry,
Hugh j. MCGUIRE, e.. 4. Myer, William Miller,
sennsper, Edwin NJ. schwartz, Alexander +.
skrom, Manley SOM, William l. scott N,o SGarles
I Jc.sps i aSas, William Al mes !. i ho odss Albert Al IssnSr,
Edward A. Mahony, Wnliam II. Carroll, william
I; Hughes, James N,chql, ssmuei :: sh &Ss,,
schnapper, Sidney Mayer, John f. Reagan.
The following young misses may be gradu-
ates
Daisy Acker, Emily Alexander, Katie Boylston,
Winnie Burke Euphemis Sosgroye, MAY Don
Katie .Gridens, Katie Harrington, Mary hsndeT.
Kinney yD MasF asi hsSloi. sophie LsnsTidse, Mamie
Mcmahon, Addie McManus, Julie o'Keefe. Fossie
Parker, Loretto Ryan, Sadie Schwarz, Maggie
Walsh, Alvina Guntner, Marcella Mundsy, Maggie
Colgan, Nora Murphy.
Grammar School No. a Is at 20S East For.
ty-second street. The Principal is Mr.. 10
seph w. Cremin. Mr.. Cremln is a scholarly
looking man and Is greatly liked by the
pupils. He is a great admirer of The EVEN
mo WORLD. He has charge of q bright SCI
of boys. The average age of the first grad'
boys is fourteen years. The names OF TIT
probable graduates are:
Henry Baker, Thomas Brazil, william Canary
Joseph, Cohn, Charles Hesselbach, William Kenny
jacob Redenberg, Joseph Kropman. Joseph Me
Corken. Joseph Mcdonnell, David Rosenthal
Isaac schimel, Ogden Thompson, John Ulr,ch
Bjorkwall, Thomas Donobue, Herman Fisher
William Foster, Timothy Mahoney, James MoDo
nell, Bernard \. Roberts, William Maggie, Raphae
Rosenthal, Thomas Ryan. Remsen shipyay
Irott, Herman Wahlig, Edward Weimer, Anthem.
Anderer, Alfred samuelB, Frederick To,ten, Bern
ard Barrett, James Flynn.
H. p. O'Neil is the Principal of Gramma
School No. %, located at 36 City Hall place
He has been Principal for fifteen years
Michael j. Dryer is the teacher Of tn
an exhibition of maps and drawings. Ol
account of the great merit that the picture
possessed the entire collection was ordered
to be sent to the Board of Education, wher
it can now be seen. The graduating class
as follows:
A. Patton, l. Shea, d. Morris. D. Sylvester, L
Longomarsini, A; Toppiani. j. Celia, l. sullivan
n: Altmsrs, A. Wheeler z; Jacobs, :: MARKS E
mark, A.. Green, A. Demartine, A. Croco, Il
Levy, A. Bemrosch, G. Goldberg, G. Ts:.ss, !
Lazarus, s. Lewis, A. Cavsgnaro, u. Harris.
The evening world., 1888-05-19
I could say no o

l could say no more.
Then she walked up and down the room.
"How do you like my new dressI" she
asked, revolving before me as il on a pivot.
| murmured something about angelic su-
perbness.n
ito get a dress of gray cashmere, with the un-
derskirt trimmed with deep plaiting-the
spaces 70 be filled in with bias folds above
the plaitngs in a band Of silk-the overskirt
cut square--the side cores rounded up four
breadth twelve inches longer and looped up
into a tournure. That, with n pretty little
sacque with open sleeves, trimmed to match
the underdress, would be- nice, wouldn't ity"
/ mrrmured an unqualified assent--not
about, for shs uttered the full description in
The evening world., 1888-05-19
ESPECIAL TO THE WORLD

THFECfzL to n OHf1D
NORWICH, Conn, May Ii. Thomas II. Hood,
ex-cashier OF the Board Of Water Commissioner,
was a~rraigned in the Superior Court to-day, charged
with embezzling 50, 600 Of the clty's funds. He
pleaded guilty, and was sen.enced to Two years
and six months in Jail. Hood disappeared from the
city last winter. He was at that time q leading
politician and one Of the instigators of the Knights
Of Labor in this city. For weeks he remained In
hiding inside the city limits, while the authorities
At last discovered he had been stopping at his resi-
dence on Franklin street, q stones throw from
poiice headquarters, with his family for . week.
There Is another suit pending against his father-in-
law, Harvey Chapman, his bondsnan, TO recover
IS, 900, the amount OF Hoods bond. which Will be
stuDbornly fought by Chapman.
The evening world., 1888-05-19
The detective Got n Big Prize.

Capt. Knilea. of the West Forty-seyenth Street
station, ana his detectives yesterday raided the
pool-rooms In the private house No. aO Vest
Forty-;hird street. Albert p. Howard, OF No. 90
West Forty-fourth street, Albert Snowden, OF No.
289 West Forty fourth street, and George Mcguire,
OF No. 20: East One Hundred and Sixteenth street,
who were managing the place, were arrested. The
former was neld In $500 bail at the YorkVille Court
feature OF the raid was brought out through the
purchase by the oficers of u pool:ncket a. EVIL
went into the room, and looking At the list OF
entries, selected q horse In the hfth race at the
Grayesend track named Joe Lee. The odds were
very long and Detective Happen took him at ram
dom. But c~ur1ously enough, Joe Lee WOO the race
ana paid the comfortable sum OF sos In the pools
for 50. the omcerl with a sporting turn think u
and not be able to get his money out Of IL before
the raid. A similar oase occurred some time ago,
but the ticket was cashed and the money turned
over 70 the Police Pension Fund.