The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1888-10-05
BRIGHT BITS,

FoGG thinks your true iconoclast is the school
teacher who cures his pupils of Incidence and
sloth. He is a breaker of idles.-Boston Trans
crfDt.
Mas. BINGs-There goes poor Mrs. Blather
She bears up well under the loss of her husband
Mr. Bings-Yes she stands it nobly. Blather
carried good deal Of insurance. you know
LoUeH Citizen.
JINGs-I am told that Mrs. Puddle is an ex-
tremely bright woman.
JANGS-Bright! | should say so. Why Fud-
die has had to wear blue glasses ever since he
was marrled.-L0Welt Citizen.
Mrs. G.-La, me! The paper says the sultan
OF Turkey scarcely sleeps at all, but just walks
Z the floor all night.
Tired husband-Well, man with 100 wives
must have an awful lot of teething babies
The Cartoon.
was very sudden?
Bereaved Widow-Yes, poor John was stricken
and died without so much as a chance to tell
me where he had deposited his insurance policy
Boston BWget
DREssMAKER-There doesn't seem to be stuff
enough here to make train three yards long.
Society Belle-Dear me- how much more is
| needed?
About half a yard
"Well, take it off the neck. PHILADELPHIA
Record.
Mr.. PoMPADoUR-Would you like to go with
me this evening to the church They have Just
introduced new boy choir, and the service is
said to be interesting. High church, you know.
MISS HeaVycrape lin mourning for her father
i hardly know what to say, Mr. Pompadour
You see, have been to no amusements since
poor papa died.-LJe.
HUsBAND-Hem, er- My dear. / find my cor
respondence is becoming so heavy that l will
have to employ a typewriter You referred
yesterday to the accomplished typewriter, Miss
de Sweet. Do you know her intimately?
Wife-O; yes. She has been teaching our
daughter Clara for six months, and Clara is now
ready to go into your Office at any time.-Phiid-
deLphtG Record.
He WANTED CREDIr-Don't you see that sign
up there asked the grocer, pointing sternly to
a placard on the wall bearing the fateful words,
mo Credit Given Here"
Yes, replied the man who had lust asked
for barrel OF -four on tick, Il sEe it. But how
about the other sign up there on the other side
If You Don't see What You Want Ask for It. -
--iSomerUttLe Journal.
A NEWLY APPOINTED crier in a county court in
Australia, where there are many Chinese was
ordered by the judge to summon a witness to
the stand. "Call for All Song" was the com
mand. Pat was puzzled for moment: he
glanced shyly at the judge, and found him as
spectators he blandly simpered: "Gintlemin
would any of you favor his honor with song?"
-EIchdnge.
A Rising GENIUs.-"I want to know the name
of the man who wrote this article" said an old
gentleman who hobb!ed into the sanctum of
New York paper The managing editor looked
at the article the old man pointed out and re-
piled:
well sir what's the matter with that article
about the coal output? There is nothing per
sonal in that unless you are coal dealer"
Il am no coal-dealer."
Then how does that article interest your"
I'm this way: / have read the papers regu-
lary for forty years. and that is the first article
on that-subect have ever read that didn' t have
something to say about black diamonds or
'dusky diamonds The young man who wrote
that article has brilliant future before him.
and I'd like to have him come and take dinner
with me some day" and leaving his card, the
old man hobbled out into the street.-Terus
kSiftiRgS.