Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1888-10-24
" WILT THOU BE MINE?"
Thought-Reader's Recipe for Max
ing a Proposal.
just How n Man should Ask the Woman
He Loves to Harry Him-Stick TO
the Point, State Your Salary
and Bo Courageous.

A girl may. in the sweetness OF her heart,
overlook the clumsiness OF wooer, and
pledge herself to a man whose offer has not
been made in the proper form; life is full OF
such instances Of feminine charity. But
the thing will rankle in her mind, be she
thrice an angel, and sooner or later he will
encounter the rebuff his awkwardness de-
served at the outset, and suffer the more
because he has hoped to escape hIs punish
ment
How then ought a man 10 proposel How
is he 10 avoid the method lacking in adroit-
ness, the which, If he haplessly employ it,
must result in his more or less immediate
discontinue.
The first rule which l submit to the con-
sderation of the faculty has more in it than
meets the eye.
When you propose to lady, ask her to
marry you.
Under the seeming of truism, this is a
most subtle regulation.
You must ask.
You must make il clear that YOU ask her,
for men have been known to betroth them
selves to Angela when they really meant TO
ask Angela TO countenance their SUIT 10
Angela's sister. A proposal is like a bullet
from a one hundred-ton gun, a forcible and
weighty missive, which must be speeded in
the right direction and no other.
You must be sure that you ask her to
marry you. Nothing is easier than for
bashful man To persuade himself that he
has arranged a marriage with Angela,
when in fact ne has only secured her hand
for the cotillion. The converse obtains, too
it is a dreadful position in which you place
yourself If you want to dance with Angela
Tor an hour, and in your fervor give her to
lt,f,er f,,rf infv,
which you propose.
Again, you must ask her to marry YOU.
Make it plain that it Is for yourself you pro-
pose; Miles Standi5h did well on the other
tack, but his was al exceptional case. If
Angela had been in doubt whether 10 give
her heart to you or to your friend Billy, and
you, in the obliquity of your wretched deli
cacy, begin your set speech with a modest
disquisition upon Billy's superior claims to
her favor land men not uncommonly grow
mock modest in affairs Of the heart) Angela
may suppose that it is for Billy that you
plead, and be disgusted with you both,
thinking you numskull not to speak for
your self, and Billy doubly numskull to let
you conduct for him a negotiation which
every man.should conduct for himself.
Next:
Avoid figures Of speech and circumlocu-
tions.
have heard a man (he subsequently
married a termagant, and served himself
rightly boast that he had never put 1t in
any woman's power TO say him no, plump
ly. 1t was the habit of this ruffian, when
he desired to offer his hand to a lady, to
disguise his meaning in a parable; so to put
the matter to her that if she wanted to
marry him she might say so, and IL not
might avoid the issue. He was a coward,
of course, and a sneak as well. Think of it
from the standpoint of Angelal In leaving
himself safe he put her in the most hideous
position imaginable. For if she inclined to
marry him, and said so, she left it quite
open for him 10 say: my dear Miss
Angela, you altogether misunderstood me.
When asked you IL you would confide
your life 20 my keeping had no such pur-
pose as YOU imagine, but intended merely
to ask IL you would share my buggy with
me tomorrow evening, and rely upon my
bringing you home in safety and without an
upset"
Such cowardice is quite objectionable.
The worst that can happen to the man who
proposes is TO be rejected, which is surely
no dreadful matter. am at the present
moment most desperately i'm love with the
Empress Dowager of -. / have made
no declaration Of my passion, because the
disparity between her exalted station and
my own comparatively humble lot would
render such union ill-advIsed, beside which
cha Is old enough to be my grandmother,
and morbidly ll-.snpered. But would /
hesitate 20 Offer her my hand, II ] wished
| to do so aud the opportunity presented
itself because know that should be said
nayi Not bit Of il. II is no disgrace to
be refused. am not sure that it is al
ways calamity. There are not less
than a dozen women whom, il proposed
! 10 them, I should sincerely thank for refus-
| ing ne. remember, one very cold evening
| In 81. Petersburg, az experience much in
/ soipt was numbed and blind with frost;
| il was in a sleigh on the ice Of the Neyg,
/ and was unmarried Ut the moment. There
were two sisters, one young, beautiful, ac-
| complished and fabulously rich, the other
1 Elere nOnenity and cross-eyed. and in my
dense irigid.ty ! offered my hand to the one
| didn't want She aeciiaed He lperhaps
because the cold, which was extreme, even
| for person acclima;ized by some five and
forty Russian winters, had benumbcd her
tool, and did feel unhappy. do ! regret nay
reflections On the contrary, rejoice al IL,
! Il is the only circumstance associated with
coid wsather-a condition ] abhor-which
recall with aay satisfaction
Aud yet how many mea aodge about the
/ question as if it would bias. thsiF whole
lives to meet with refusal II is pity, IN
/ this connection, that the cd custom Of
/ 'Snee.lng 70 make an offer ever died out.
/ The attitude has its Inconvenience, IN
doubtedly. 1t is not suited 20 our modern
dress, and results in abominable kneeing
7 OF ones trousers And il is a most uncom-
i Portable position in which to be surprised by
an inoppOrtune stranger. But i was def
nite-there was no feeling ones way about
IL. Tha lady couldn't doubt your meaning,
once 20 uwere literally at her feet.
Another rule, and one especially 70 be
considered, is;
Avoid digressions.
! Nothing is more deplorabie than an inter-
/ val in 3 proposal. The matter should be
gone through with speedily, once your
! attack ha0ins. Il an attach. siyava No