davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25
PAwNED HIS sABY's CLOTHES.

A Scene which Led n Steady Drink
err 20 Become n Teetotaler.
.No won't drink with you to-day.
boys" said q well dressed young man
to several companions as they settled
down in a New York cafe the other
evening, when the decanter was pass
ed. 1.-THE fact is. boys. 1 have quit
drinking; in fact, l have sworn OF"
He was greeted with shouts of laugh
ter by the jolly fellows around him;
they put the decanter under his nose.
and INDUCED in many jokes at his ex-
pense. but he refused to drink, and
was rather serious about it.
whats the matter with you, old
boy" sang out one. 'If you've quit
drinking. something's up. Tell us
what it is"
swell. boys, will. though l know
you'll laugh at me. But I'll tell you
Just the same. I have been hard
drinker all my ife-ever since Twas
married. as all you fellows know.
love whisky; it's as sweet to me as
sugar, and God only knows how I'll
quit it. For five years not a day has
passed over my head that l didn't
have a cocktail before breakfast and
many drinks through the day. But
I'm done.
Yesterday was over on the East
side. Down in the Bowery customer
of mine keeps pawn-shop. l called
on him, and, while l was there, o
young man of not more than rs. wear
ing seedy- looking clothes, and with
the appearance of not having seen a
sober day for month, came in with q
little parcel in his hand.
"Tremblingly he unwrapped it, and
handed the article to the pawnbroker.
Give me 10 cents And. boys. what
do you suppose it WASP A pair of baby
shoes-little bits of things. with the
bottoms only a trfe soiled. as il they
had been worn once or twice.
Where did you get these" asked
the pawnbroker.
Got them at home replied the
man, who had an intelligent face, de-
spite his sad condition. My wife
bought them for my baby. Give me
10 cents for them; I want drink.
You had better take these shoes
back to your wife. The baby will need
them,' said the pawnbroker.
No. she won't need them. be.
cause she's dead. She's lying In the
house now; she died last night
AS he said this the poor fellow broke
down, bowed his head on the counter
and wept like a child. Boys, you cal
laugh if you like, but have little
baby of my own up homo. and swea1
I'll never drink another drop" Al
he got up and went out his compan
ions ceased laughing and in "a mo
ment each was busily engaged in read
ing a newspaper. Even Mail am
Express reporter. who CHANGED to b
in earshot felt a moisture about hi
| aVes
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25
ROYAL JOkerSs

The Princess Christian is almost as
ready with bright remarks as with kind
looks and words, and l heard an amusing
story in connection with her witty re-
plies which will bear repeating. The
other day, when driving with her males
ty, the queen, they came across party
Of children Maying. Her majesty
stopped the carriage and distributed
some silver, to the great delight of the
young folks, while the princess with
Characteristic generosity emptied her
purse among them. ''There, she ex,
claimed at last, "now am bankrupt.
"Not so" said the queen, "for you have
a soverei gn left. "Ah, mother" re:
piled her daughter, 'that sovereign !
could not possibly spare. London Let
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25
An Ancient Mexican Solomon.

An Ancient Mexican Solomon.
A wife once summoned her husband
before an alcade for having serenaded
another woman.
Bring forth the culprit" said the
Judge. sand let him play to us as he
played before the woman he wished to
captivate.
When this was done the judge asked:
sis that the tune you playedP"
Isl. senor."
.Is that the best you can play itP''
Isl, SENIOR"
''Then l fine you 80 for disturbing
the public peace"
Solomon could have come no nearer
to the standard of natural justice. -
81. a. BonorcI
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25
Because I Love You
~ can not bring you wealth." she said;
II can not bring you fame, or place
Among the noted of the race;

II can not DrinS you Wtattu, euo oaius
II can not bring you fame, or place
Among tho noted of the race;
But can love you.
when trials come to test you, sweet,
lean be sunlight to your feet;
My kiss your precious lips shall greet.
Because love you.
"When daylight dies along the west
You will come home to me to rest,
And shall sleep upon your breast
Because / love you.
'.If sickness comes, beside your bod
will lend low with quiet tread,
And pray Gods blessing on your head.
Because love you.
GAS dew cllngs to the violet
Making the fragrant chalice wet
So my life into yours is set,
Because I love you.
"Only myself, my all, / bring;
But count 1t, sweet q precious thing
To give my life an offering,
Because l love you.
81 bow before no other shrine;
II 90 first across deaths line
Twill return to claim you mine,
Because l love you"
Sarah 4. Bolton, iu Home Journal
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25
Language flashed

At swell boarding house over on
the East side. the boarders had quite
little excitement one day recently. 1t
seems that the cook and the waitress
are not on very good terms and never
allow a chance to quarrel to go By.
For more than a month the cook, who
is a great hulk of woman, has had it
in for the waitress. little red-headed
Irish girl, and only a very gentle
zephyr was needed to fan the smoul-
dering fire of wrath into red-hot
flame. On the day in question tho
meats were roast beef and roast lamb.
and as usual the star boarder. who
holds forth at the head of the table,
asked for both. Annie, the waitress.
tripped down the hall to get his order
filed, and all of the doors being open,
she was heard to say:
':Now, Dootchy, git a move on yer
SELF an hustle up wild a double head
or. De dude at de head av de table
wants bate an lamb"
The only reply that could be heard
was low grumbling sound from tho
cook, and Annie came back for more
orders. as a fresh batch OF boarders
had just seated themselves. When it
came time for her to get the star
boarder's dinner the cook had only
put roast beef on the tray. and neg
lected to provide the lamb. Again her
rich Waukegan voice echoed down the
hall in something of this style:
"Here, here. here! Ye big awk-
wark. sourkraut-eatin'. boot Gu female!
wure afther tellin' ye ter put on both
bate an lamb, an here we've up an
left out the lamb entoirely. Ye haven
got the sinse av smoked herring, ye
ould bundle av soap grease.
..Vell, make you tink I got more
sense as der dyvel you little red
headed Irish peppermint drop. You
tink you can make foolishness NIT me,
amt it? Veil, fool you" Then fol-
lowed an uproar in which the English
| language was murdered in both Dutch
and Irish. Finally Annie gave scream
and came flying into the dining room
crying at the top of her voice, ''Saye
me! Save me! Fur dk love av hlvcn
don't let hur lay hur hands on me. =
and following close behind was the
cook, with carvIng-knife in one hant
and hot custard pic in the other
..vere ish dot bed-bug chaser, till
kill herp" yelled the cook. as sh'
brandished her knife, all of which 81
terrified the waitress that without AM
warning she bounced up on the dimes
table, and prepared to jump off on thu
other side. At this moment the land
lady came in and ordered the girls t.
pack up their duds and leave. dot
your fault you sucker. YOU" said tn
cook, shaking the knife at the wait
ress, 'und fix YOU" Here she poise'
the pie plate containing the hot pie. OF
the palm of her hand for second. ant
before Annie knew what was coming
let drive and struck her full in tn
face. Two new girls now run tina
boarding house. and fighting wit
knives and pies on the premises
barred. sam.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25
Various Ugly Pots.

Ugliness or repelling habits are gen
orally no bar to lady's feeling when
her net animal is concerned. Some have
been known to share their bed with an
iguana, which is the most repulsive
looking reptile in Brazil. 1t is well
known that Byron, among the pets who
accompanied him in his travels, pos
sessed bear; and Edmund kean kept q
South American lion as his constant
companion. More ordinary pets might
be quoted, such asyoung wolves, jackals,
leaopards, and snakes. Even frogs,
lizards, and hedgehogs have been petted
by men men of repute. Wolsey be.
slowed his affection on familiar old
carp, Cowper on hares, and Sir John
Lubbock wooded the favor of Syrian
wasp.-London Standard.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

poor woman entered and flung herself
on Cousin Ellen's bed. bursting into
flood Of tears.
..What shall dol What shall I dol"
she sobbed
.sWhat is the matter. Marias" asked
Cousin Ellen, with as much solicitude
rs she could command for the occa-
sion.
%. Ellen think James Ii losing
his mind. He has Just dropped asleep
and slipped away to talk to you about
it"
..NonsenseI losing his mindl Where
do you see any evidence of thatp'
Didn't you hear the way he talked
tonight"
why yes of course I did But
what of thatp He seemed to me very
sane. What did he say that especially
indicated insanity"
why. he found fault So"
"Well, il that an evidence of insan-
typ
81 should think So He is usually
so easy, and don't mind anything"
Il think you're mistaken there. l
think he minds plenty Of things. but
he don't choose to say SO. DO you
think that every time you express dis
approval of anything you are giving
evidences of insanityr'
why. NO! of course not But then.
I'm differently constituted. feel
things so. aud can't help saying So"
If Cousin Ellen had spoken then she
would have been so rude as TO say
'.Bosh!'' But she held her peace few
moments.
See here. Maria" she said. II have
but little patience with the people who
fatter themselves that they cant
help speaking when things are un-
pleasant to them. Let me tell you that
James knows when things ar6 uncom-
Portable around him, quite as well as
you do. and his not complaining oil
the time is not an evidence of want of
feeling, but of good sense. I'm not
going to say anything more. don't
believe in guests making themselves
generally obnoxious. Go ask James
what is the matter with him."
And Cousin Ellen knew by Maria S
expressions the next morning Mt the
breakfast table that she had not only
asked him, but had been answered
gently and wisely.
cousin Ellen" she burst out
impetuously about 10 'clock, as they
sat in uncomfortable silence. sewing.
(while Miss Renter wondered whether
it was not just about time that her
visit was endcD Il had made up my
mind 1 wouldn't say q word moro. !
feel so mortified. but just can't hclr
it. should burst if didn't think
if l talked tho matter over with y GU
we'd feel more comfortable all round.
Aunt Ellen did not say much. but she
said it we'll. After moments silence
she concluded with, "Maria. there IL
one thing did not mean to tell you.
but l think l will. 1t will put the
matter very clearly before you. DE-
| you know the reason Stephen did mo-
fix the cato Yesterday He told me
that mother was always fretting about
nothing. and he was determined t.
give her something to fret about.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25
French Women Advancing.

The women are coming to the front
more than ever in France They are not
only iolies mondaines. who set the fash,
ions and miracles of makeup, but
they are pushing their way everywhere
among the males. We have lady doctors,
lady stock brokers, lady reporters, and
recently lady defended her father in q
court with acumen worthy Of an ancient
forensic hand. Now the Sorbenne has
awarded, for the first time to woman,
a diploma of "doctor of science" The
recipient of the honor is modest young
lady named Mdlle. Leblois, daughter OF
aStrasbourg pastor, and she is described
as q veritable prodigy of learning. Lon,
don Telegraph.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25
particular about the Make.

Zone % MY hired men has got q no.
ton he wants a fddle,' said an agri-
culturist to the dealer. "What might
that secon' hand one in the winner be
wuthP'
That's Stradivarius; its worth
5000"
'Tll speak to the hired man about
it. shouted the ngriculturist as he
backed out OF the place: -Hc may not
like that make
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25
Views Of Baptism.

Jim Webster - "What preachers
gwinter baptize dat babyY
Sam Johnsing- 'Parson Whangdoodle
Baxter"
Chow much does he git?"
''Two dollars"
"You oughter git Parson Bledsoe.
He'll do it for 81" ;,
''Huh, what sorter baptism can yet git
for $1?"
eff yer has got yer doubts about hits
effercacy you can hab de chile baptized
twict for de money what you pays Par
SON Whangdoodle Baxter. Texas Sift-
in2s.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25
venetian style of Funeral.

A gentleman states that on last Mon
dav. about one mile above Canton, Mo-,
he saw the novel site of o funeral pro-
cession OF skiffs. The house from which
the procession started was surrounded
by water, and the only way to get the
body of the dead man to Canton was by
boat The remains were deposited IN
the front skiff; following it in regular
order came several other boats filled
with relatives and friends. The river
was rough and the boats rocked to and
fro in the waves, but doubtless the occu-
pants of the boats were used to rough
water, and, though there were number
of women in the procession, none seemed
to be afraid. -Keokuk (Ia.) Gate City.
"Nadiy," the new opera, is pronounced
Dr.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

To the Editor
Please inform you readers that have
a positive remedy for the above named
disease. BY it's timely use thousands oil
hopeless cases have been permanently
cured. shall be glad to send two bottles
Of my remedy FREE to any oil your readers
who have consumption il they will send me
their Express and P. o. address.
Respectfully, T. A. SLOCUM. NJ. c.,
ISL Pearl St., New York.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

rhen Baby was sick, we gave her Castoria,
When she was Child, she cried for Castoria,
When she became Miss, she chung to Castoris,
When she had Children, she gave them Castoria.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

"Ah me-! sighed Potts, "I'm tired ofliving,
The world is hollow, ambitions vain"
"Come now! said his chum, II know the
symptoms;
It's all your liver--that's very plain.
You need not suffer, for help is easy;
Pierce's Pellets 60 right to the place.
"A friend to the bilious well might call
them
There's nothing better; they'll suit your
case"
Potts ceased his signing and bought the
''Pelets."
No more he mourneth his hapless lott
His face is cheerful, his heart is lightsome,
His melancholy is quite forgot!
Tissue paper puts a beautiful polish on
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

POPULAR EducAII0hs
We sympathize with the feeling which Of
ten leads citizens to boast that no child
born in this country need grow up in igno-
rance, and yet it is a fact that many peo-
ple who have learned to read and write
have never taught themselves to think. A
man who suffered from catarrh, consump-
ton, bronchitis. scrofula, or oliver COM
plaint," might read, till his eyes dropped
out, how these and many other diseases
have been cured by DR.. Pierce's Golden
Medical Discovery. but il he did not take
the lesson to himself and test the virtues
of this great medicine, his time would be
thrown away.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

To Persons Going to Mountain and
Seaside.
The Moxie people have made you a Toe
bottle of it's Syrup, that with ice water
will make you ssventy-five half tumblers
OF rich, luscious, beverage nerve food, that
will give you big appetite, strong, vigo-
rous nerve strength OF double endurance,
without stimulation, reaction or harm,
acting as a food, not like alcohol. Con-
tains no drugs Has recovered many
cases OF helpless paralysis from nervous
exhaustion. The u. s. Courts have con-
firmed these facts from a bitter examina-
ton into its merits.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

B. B. B. is the only Blood Purifier that
makes positive and permanent cure of oil
Blood Diseases For females, troubled with
painful menstruation, ovarian tumors, uterine
ulcers, and chronic troubles, its action Is
speedy and efectuaI One S1.00 bottle Will
convince anyone. bottles $500. All Drug
gists. Blood Balm Co.. Atlanta. Ga.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

Our young friend Asa Adams who Just
graduated at Elliott's Business College,
Burlington, H., has secured fine posi-
ton in Burlington.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

Mrs. Cleveland has come out frankly with
the assertion that base ball in her favorite
anort
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25
THE GREAT JUBILEE.
In Honor of the Settlement Of the
Nnrthweat Territory.

No event of the nineteenth century
has attracted more attention than the
coming celebration of the one hun
dredth anniversary of the Northwest
territory, which opens its doors in Gin
cinnati on the Fourth of July and con-
tinues one hundred days, or until Octo-
Der q, 1888.
Extensive preparations have been
made for it in the erection of mammoth
buildings in the heart of the city; the
million feet of space for exhibiting pur
poses have been allotted; the general
government will contribute handsome
display; the best art collection ever
seen in America has been secured; there
will be the most elaborate electrical dis
play ever witnessed in this country,
and, in short, no show of the magni-
tude of the Centennial Exposition has
ever been witnessed in this country.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25
Botanic blood Balm.

In a hail storm in India recently 15Oper
sons were killed by the hail.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25
We Point with Pride

To the GOOD Eams at heme." won by Hoods earsa-
parilla. In Lowell Mass, where It Is prepared.
there is more of Hoods sa-saparla sold than Of all
ether medicines wnole ncighborhoods arc taking
at the lime and 1t has given the best OF sat
isfsction since its Introduction ten years ago. This
could not be IL the medicine did not poses, merit.
II you suffer from impure blood or debility, try
Hoods Sarsaparilla and you will renliSs Its peculiar
curative power.
II had salt IN my left arm three years SUI
fering terribly. ltook Hoods Sarsapsrilla tnd tho
salt rheum has entirely disappeared" II NJ. MILLa
n French ST.. Lower, Mass.
Hoods Sarsapariila
Sold by all druggista d, six s Prepared only
BY c. l. HOOD 4 CO. Apothecaries, Lowell MasA
Ion nnsas One Nnllar
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

DR.. Sage's Catarrh Remedy cures when
every other so-called remedy fails.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

DIR. Paxton, OF the First Prssby terrain
church, New York, gets SIS, GOO a year,
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

A tiny herring barrel is a new confection-
cry holder.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

There are so, 900 Chinese in Australia.
The national campaign is now fully in
augurated.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

A barber's bell punch chair, just out,
registers the number Of shaves.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

Wilkie Collins, the author, is in poor
health.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

SCRATCAES.-J. Il. Shafer, Madison,
Wis, says: 81 cured horse of the worst case
Of scratches that ever saw with Veterinary
Carboiisalve. OF all the remedies ever saw
this is the boss" 35c and g., at Druggists.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

In the German reichstag there are 1913
smokers and 80 non-smokers.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

Mrs. Cleveland is % great friend OF ami
mails.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25
Popular Education.

Tissue paper puts beautiful polish OF
tinMare.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

San Francisco is building a crematory.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25
consumption surely Cured.

"Nadjy," the new opera, is pronoun
''Naddy."
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

their life haQ Sn0 seen nim Nho lHlS.
While poor Stephen thought to him
self, that if father was going to DO
like that too, the sooner he left for
more comfortable quarters the better.
"Where are my slippers, MariaP'
asked Mr.. Wilson. in the same fretful
tone.
.In the closet"
"Well, / should think you might get
them for me when you know how dog
tired l am"
.Here they are. James," answered
Mrs Wilson. meekly, thoroughly SUBJ
dued by her fear of James prospect
i've illness.
Those are my best ones. bring me
nv old ones since I've come to think
of it, I'll take my best Ones" he
called after her. just as she had sue
cessfully made the change and was re.
turning with the old ones.
After weary evening, which Mr..
Wilson spent in fretting; Mrs. Wilson.
in subdued silence; Stephen. in setting
out under the trees in the dark. whis'
tlrg to himself in detected manner
anu wondering what was to be the
outcome of it all; and Cousin Ellen il
serenely knitting, while she put in {
word here and there. not seeming Il
notice Mrs. Wilson's ill-humor. After
three or four hours Of this discomfort
the family found themselves preparing
for bed.
Tap. tap. tap. came softly at mid
night on Cousin Ellen's door. accom-
panied by a whisper Cousin Ellen
may 1 come inP'
| A cordial permission granted. tn
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-08-25

= by observing the laws of health =
and resorting to that cheat the
grave medicine,