davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-03-03
DIDN'T SELL HIM.

A gentleman while riding through the Mississippi river bottoms stopped at Snegro cabin to get a drink of wa ter. Noticing very fine setter dog, the gentleman said:
 "That is beautiful dog"
 "Yas, sah, bout ez putty CT dog e dar is in dis here neighborhood"
 "You haven't any use for such dog AS that"
 No, sah, dat's CT fack."
 Suppose were to give you five dollars, put rope around the dogs neck and lead him away"
 "Wouldn't hear no 'plaint oatcn me, sah."
 The man gave the negro i've dollarp, took up a rope, secured the dog and led him of. He had gone about two miles when he was met by planter, who, looking at the dog, exclaimed !:
 Look here, what are you doing with my dog?"
 "You must be mistaken, sir. This is my dog. gave an old negro five dollars for him just now"
 "Five dollars. Why, he cost me fifty. Come on back here and show me the negro"
 The man went back with the plan ter. They found the old negro sitting in front of his cabin.
 Look here, Mario" exclaimed the planter, "why did you sell my dog?"
 "I didn' sell yo' dog, coin"
 "You are an old liar !" exclaimed the man. "I came along here and gave you i've dollars for him."
 wy, man, you ain't right bright in yo' mine. You come erlanng here an said dat de dog wuz beautiful. didn' 'spute dat, cage he is beautiful. Den you said dat I didn' hab no use fur sich CT dog, am didn' 'spute you cage l ain't. Den you said suthin' bout gibin me f. dollars an' leadin' de dog erway. Dat hit me, fur CT man down in dis country is CT fool dat woan take f. dollars wen CT pusson gibs 1t ter him. Didn' ax me ef de dog 'longed ter me, am didn say nuthin' bout buyin' finn. I neber tole you dat de dog wuz mine"
 "Yon old rascal, give1 me my money"
 "Whut, de f. dollars7"
 "Yes."
 "Wall, sah, would, would do 1t in CT mint an' show joy on mer face in beiH able ter 'commerdate yer, but I spent dat money jes now fur some con ter feed mer ole nag wid. Jes skuze me, please, fur pse got bizDess out yere in de woods"
The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-03-03

Some Chicago men are raising a s100,o00 fund to get the tallest obe- fisk in the world to add to the glory of Chicago. "Cert," said one magnate of the pork business, .'Pm your huckle- berry for thousand, and you can put me down for hundred dollars toward getting agood ornamental cage for the critter. There's 90 many children playing around the parks that you can't be too careful. .D-PacE.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-03-03


 mistaken the house," and then, grow ing bolder, ventured to tell her that a young lady should not be abroad so late at night. She looked at me closely, but upon her face there was no smile.
 "Who are you?" I asked.
 She raised her hands again, shrieked in chilling laughter, sprang to her feet and fled.
 sat there long and tremulously after she had gone. I hoated away in a nervous reverie, waiting for Prof. Marico to return, but he did not come back. Suddenly I wondered if had been dreaming, wondered if the professor would laugh when I should tell him of my strange adventure. The clock struck four. went to bed, and, exhausted, sank to sleep. When awoke the next morning thought of my strange dream, and called the pro- lessor, but received no answer. l looked, and his bed had not been touched. Still half dazed, I arose and took up the morning paper that had been thrust under my door. Almost the first item my glance fell upon was the following;
 "A wedding which it was thought would occur last night at Judge Panno's residence did not take place Prof. Marico and Miss Henesito Pragros were to be married, but at the appointed time the professor failed to make his appearance. The affair had been guarded very closely, not even the professors closest friends having been apprised of the coming cere- mony, and when he failed to come, those who were into the secret de- clared that, peculiar man that he was he had forgotten the young woman who, dressed in wedding garments, StOOu tO ICCCiNC HILL. IL Ndr said that the couple, apparently happy, had been seen the day before reading an old English novel, and no one could understand the non-appear- ance of the professor. Suddenly it was discovered that the prospective bride, who at first had shown great nervousness, had disappeared. A party of gentlemen went out in search of her, and, while searching, came upon the dead body of the professor, lying ill a deserted street. The young woman dressed in her bridal apparel, was shortly afterward found on the street repeating a verse from the novel which she and her lover had read together No one can account for the mysterious death of the professor, but it is sup posed that he was stabbed by rival -Opte ?. Read.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-03-03
DISCOVERED HIS CHARM.

An EDgiisbman who had travelled some distance in stage coach was met by friend, who asked
 "iiow did you enjoy the ride?"
 "Oh, 1t was glorious"
 "I saw that you had companion.
 "yes, charming fellow, don't recall now of what his charm consists, but he is very, very agreeable, neverthe- less"
 "Yon mean that fellow who came over with you in the stAgeT" some one asked.
 "Yes.n
 "IIis name Is Jones. He's deaf and dumb"
 "Aw. we'll" the EBgilshmsn re- piled, "thst explains his charm."
The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-03-03
A candidate for constable in . back

A candidate for constable in back woods community Of Mississippt, in urging his claims to fitness for tho position, declared that he had once killed man. His stock went up rap- idly and his opponent, vhe ee.A claim no such distinction, was much worried over his declining chances, but with enterprise and imitation of great esmpaigners, he began to exam ise his opponents record and soon came upon something that startled him. He discovered thst his opponent had in fact killed man, but that the killing was accidental This fact was published, and, as the public felt that 1t had been cheated by pretentious fellow, the plain and unassuming rec ord searcber was elected.
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-09-06
Natural Ghosts.

In an age surrounded with all the
enlightenment of literature and art
when science has-or should have
dispelled the illusions of the past, there
yet live those who believe in the
mighty" vsitations of ghosts and
revelations from that bourne which
Shakespeare has against the popular
superstitious sentiment alleged that no
one can return.
The word mighty is used advisedly
the pale cold glmpses of the moon
appear to possess fascinat ons for
ghosts and ghouls, and the dead of
night is the accorded period of thoir
playful vagaries To show that these
so-called aspirations arise not from
supernatural. but natural causes. the
following anecdote may be instanced:
In. the village of S. about thirty
miles from Dublin. was stationed in
1880 posse of excise officers in her
Brittanic majesty's service. One night
seated around the fire in a shanty over
q bottle of the true mounta in dew, the
conversation turned up on superstition.
aud one of them. bright, stalwart
young fellow, disclaimed loudly upon
the absurdity and imposslbilty Of
ghosts and argued that such sights
were the result of disordered imagi.
nation or the double sight gift of All
overdose of alcohol.
Having to go quarter of mile
further into the country, his compa-
Mons during his absence concocted a
scheme to upset his peace of mind and
turn him into believer at the same
time. Borrowing sheet from the inn
keeper and box Of sulphur matches,
they started on their mission. and by o
short cut across the fields reached the
rendezvous and stationed themselves
behind hedge.
Nor did they have to wait long. A
CHEEKY whistle was heard, and th,
shadow of their comrade thrown BY
the moon upon tho white dusty roaC
could be seen rapidly approaching
Quickly he who was to play the role o
ghost was arrayed in his winding shee
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-09-06
Changed the Subject.

Yes" he said. Life is so lonely"
1T is lonely sometimes" she Ak
swered.
Wouldn't it be sweet TO have littls
cottage covered with ivy and honey.
suckle and rose bushes?"
"Oh! wouldn't itP''
"And when fellow came home tire!
from busune 10 have nee little wife
meet him at the door W tn kiss?"
''Y-e-e.s."
"And then the summer nights. thi
windows open, the sunset just giving
light enough in the coy parlor. and
you'll mean u wife at the piano sing.
ing in the cleaning. 1t would be love-
ly."
Observation-Disclosures
"And then"
"At this point care. worn womt n
came around the corner with par OF
twins in perambuator A dead
silence fell upon the summer ar for a
little. Then they changed the subject
-San Francisco ChrOHicle.
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-09-06
CHINESE ETIQUETTE.

Rules of behavior Prescribed by Inn
memorial Custom In the (eies-
tiaI Empire.
Sir James Legge, the professor Of Chinese
Mt Oxford, has recently published some
curious details concerning the 'Li-Ki," or
"Rules OF Behavior" q classic work In a
country where man is bound by traditional
ceremony from his fret steps until The day
OF his death. AS to visits, the manual directs,
among other things, that the master OF the
house must advance outside TO meet his
guest, who will refuse to enter the door first;
the host, after a profound bow, then enters
at the side of the guest The door passed,
the same trouble occurs about going up
stairs; 1t 10 only after long exchange OF set
compliments that the two walk up side by
side, but even then the visitor must mount
the first step with his right foot aud the host
with his left foot Cinnamon who failed to
observe This ceremonial would be considered
without breeding.
IL the visitor is invited to dinner custom
orders that when the invitation is given he
shall receive from the host certain advise as
10 conduct, such as: "Do not eat with noise;
do not crunch the bones with your teeth or
drink down the sauces at a gulp." This Is
said seriously aud seriously received. III the
master OF The house Is person OF import
ance and offers To his guest fruit with stones
or pits, such as peaches aud cherries, the
guest must put the pits IN his pocket In order
not to appear to refuse anything the host is
good enough To offer. IL melon Is served
the manner OF cutting 1t depends upon the
cast TO which the cutter belongs. eutiments.
are regulated by custom AS we'll MS their ex-
preston. Thus, II In the course OF a visit
refreshments are offered to the guest, he
must drink the first cup ''with All air OF pro-
found thought" the second with satisfied
expression"
The oil KIP has many pages devoted 10
the ceremonial Of mourning. Grief must at
tain its height at the return from the funeral.
Tue code says: "When father has died the
sou must seem to be completely overwhelm-
ed; when the body has been placed in The
coffin, he should cast around him rapid glauces
OF affection. as II he sought for something he
could not fud. After the burial he should
appear uneasy aud alarmed, as II waiting for
someone who does not come. At the end Of
the first year of mourning, he should appear
sad; at he end Of the second year, uneasy"
Lame ntations are restricted TO certain hours
and places. At certain times the mourner
must bare his breast and Jump up and down.
IL mourning for distant relative, 1t Is sui
hcient for him to pretend to jump. ConsOla-
tion is also me ted out b. rule. The 'Li-Ki"
mentions a woman named King Klang, who
was so well bred that having lost both hus-
band and son she mourned for her son both
day aud night and for her husband by day
Onlt Irregularty in ceremonial as to mourn
ing is regarded with such disfavor that the
Ill KIP observes: at Is better not TO mourn
at all than to mourn alter an improper fash
ion and In improper dress"
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-09-06
Get Up of an Arabian Girl.

A small landslide came tumblino
down on the left. 1t was started b., Il
line of sheep and goats which stood.
with an amused look. watching our
caravan. She refused to remove her
face veil. but permitted full view OF
her trinkets. On the top of her head
four trousers buttons were united by
cords in the form of Greek cross.
Near each temple was All iron har-
ness ring. one and one.eighth inch
thick, tied to the lower combination.
From these rings down to the edges OF
the face-vei ran two pie ces of iron and
brass jack-chain. From the rear but
ton over the part in tho hair a cord ran
backward. Bunches of beads hung
from the cords at her own temples. and
lot of beads with liver diskas large
as Bland dollar hung from each ear.
Three bracelets of turquoise and amber
graced each arm. and from one of them
dangled brass navy button. There
were rings on her fingers and thumbs
Nineteen dazzling necklaces hung
around her neck-some of torquoise'
some Of amber, while some were silver,
and one was made up of the iron fer
rules from the sticks OF tourists UNI
bre las. - Century.
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-09-06
A Comedy of Errors.

Max |. Katz. of the firm of Katz &
Hewen. participated in a little comedy
of errorsi which ended in the police
station yesterday afternoon. A west
side painter had made sign for Mr..
Katz and they ayr eed to go together
and inspect it. Meeting the painter on
the street, standing beside what Mr..
Katz supposed to be the painters bug
gy, they both climed in the vehicle and
drove Off The horse was very tame
animal and Mr.. Katz advised the paint.
er 10 buy horse whose motions could
be detected with the naked eye.
IF you don't like the horse why
don you get better oneP' exclaimed
his companion.
why, l never owned the animal"
said Katz, where upon the painter said
he would eat paint pot if he ever saw
the horse before. Then it became
clear thar they had some other man 8
horse. 1t became clearer when they
arrived on Wisconsin street and found
the owner gnashing his teeth and talk
ing 10 n policeman: At first he insist.
ed on lynching both the culprits single
handed. but they went together 10 the
police station and the matter was sat
isfactorily explained. -MiIwaukee W,s.
co,1Siu
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-09-06
Jewish Statistics.

II is estimated that the total number Of
Jews throughout the world is between s, $780,
OOO aud 10, 900, 100. In the United Kingdom
there are about 100, 0Jj, of whom seven tenths
are in London, the great part OF the remain.
der being in Manchester, l. verpool. Leeds
aud Birmingham Scotland reckons only
1850, Ireland only l,00J. In the British
colonies there are something less than al, 900.
In France there are 70,0OJ. OF whom 1000
ure IN Paris. About QUO were transferred
upon the annexation of the provinces To the
German empire, among whose 80, O0O, 900 of
inhabitants Coz, 00) be ong To this remarkable
race Jews are found in large numbers along
the northern coast OF Africa, as we'll as in
A byssinia
In America there are half million, aud
Jews dwell In Mexico and in almost every
to be from A. OOO to So 900 in Persia, III, 900 to
IL, 600 in the Khanates, and about the same
number in each OF the countries OF India.
Switzerland, Belgium, and Holland have also
considerable Jewish population. The influx
OF Jews into Palestine from other parts of the
Turkish dominlons, and ALEC from Poland,
Russia, and central Europe, which has been
going on from the early part of the present
century, is a noteworthy fact The Turkish
government is described as showing an entire
liberation, but 1t is not now favorable to an
immigration into Palestine, a circums lance
attributed TO fear of the lnroad of European
ideas. The state OF The Jews In the Holy
Land is, according to recent authority, not a
happy one. There is but little outlet for their
energies. A large number give Themselves
entirely up TO Hebrew studies, while the bulk
Of them exc out Il miserable livelihood By
small industries.
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-09-06
In the Subiunctive Mood.

Have YOU ever been knocked down.
run over and horribly mangled by
locomotive or an omnibusp Perhaps
not. However. much tho same effect
may be obtained by riding on top OF
an old-stylo stage-coach fifteen or
twenty miles over winding mountain
road.
Quite recently l gain ed this expert
ence, but am not kicking about it.
was not expecting to find a mountain
highway one vast round OF pleasure
and asphalt pavement
At last we halted at a typical coun-
try tavern. originally of a pronounced
auburn complexion, but now grown
gray in service. say auburn" ad-
visedly. have lived there and know
exactly how it is pronounced on its
native heath.
While the several passengers dis
mounted and shook themselves, and
the meek-eyed span slobbered noisily
in the trough. they were regarded with
critical interest by local loungers. The
spacious veranda with its heavy pillars
yawned generous welcome.
was looking for just such tranquil
retreat to select as my summer home.
The positive evidence that stained
glass and lawn tennis had not yet in
vaded its quiet precincts gave me
courage. l ventured to inquire:
'ls the landlord hereP"
The bystanders concentrated their
gaze on me, and pleasant looking
woman with two or three maiden
daughters clustered in the DOORWAY.
eyed me without fear and without re-
proach.
A man of globular form and catawba
oountenance, whose gray hair was on
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-09-06
What Massage" Will Do.

Now. in conclus on. have no wish
to be misunderstood. Massage is n OF
going to cure all the ills that flesh is
heir to. nor do give credit to all it
lays claim to; but it is not only valu-
able adjunct and aid to other branches
OF therapeutics, but diseases often
yield to it for which medicine has been
tried in vain. Massage, too. is emin-
emily calculated to remove effete mat
ter from the blood-to purify it, in
other words. 1t thus may often take
the place of exercise when that cannot
be easily had. Massage is splendid
tonic to the whole system. 1t is u safe
tonic also. Massage keeps the skin in
good working order. and all other
glands as we'll. To people troubled
with govt and chron rheumatism il
very often proves invaluable; while
yer Gus forms of paral, sis yield to the
new old-curc. - Cdssei's .Hagasine.
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-09-06
Seven Tickets in the Field.

INDUSTRIAL REFORM PARTY.
For President:
Albert +. Redstone, Of California
For V ce President;
John Colvin. OF Kansas.
Nominated at Washington, February 81.
WOMAN sUFFRAGIsTs.
For President:
Belva A Lockwood, OF Washington.
For Vice President:
Alfred Ii. Love, of Pennsylvania.
Nominated at Des MOines, NAV 10.
UNION LAB r PARTY.
For PresideS:
A. j Strealor, OF Illinois.
For Vice President:
Charles L. Cunningham, OF Arkansas.
Nominated at Cincinnati, May III
UNITED LABOR PARTY.
For Pres ident:
Robert II. Cowdry, of Illinois.
For Vice Presidents:
w. ii. 4. Wakefield, OF Kansas.
Nominated at Cincinnati, MAY H.
PROHIBITION PATTY.
For President:
ClintoTB. Fisk, of New Jersey.
For Vice President:
John A. Brooks, OF Missouri.
Nominated at Indianapolis, May 81
DEMOCRATIC PARTY.
For President:
Grover Cleveland, of New York.
For Vice President:
Allen G.. Thurman, OF Ohio.
Nominated at st. Louis, JuneS
REPUBLICAN PARTY.
For President:
Benjamin Harrison, Of Indiana.
For Vice Pr. sident:
Levi Z. Morton, of New York.
Nominated at Chicago, Juue %.
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-09-06
How Jim Tarleton Can Shoot.

Interview with an Arizona man Although
there is a great deal of lying done about
southwestern Workmanship, there is no
doubt that there are people in our country
who can come about as near putting revol.
yer bullet where they want to, In reason able
range. as yon could do It with your fingers.
One of the deadest shots In Arizona is j m
Tarleton, and L II tell you what saw him do
on one occasion. lie had had bad blood with
an Irishman named O'Hara, a desperado, and
the two men had promised faithfully to kill
each other on sight. Tarleton was standing
I'm front of a saloon when O'Hara rode up
and blazed away at him, cutting his left ear
Tarleton drew aud fred almost simultaneous
", putting a ball through OHara's right
hand breaking his pistol stock at the same
time. Tarleton's next bullet fred with great
deliberation, broke the back OF o. Ilara's
horse, which fell. carrying the rider down
with It. Tarleton stepped over 10 where his
enemy lay aud stood over him, with his re-
volvcr pointing straight at the PROSTATE mans
forehead for as much as a minute, although
II seemed TO us who we're looking on like half
an hour. Then he looked around aud seeing
q hen about twenty steps away he drew a
bead on it, blazed away, and shot II through
the head. Without saying a word he put his
plstol away and walked back into the saot1.
0'liara got up and followed hun into the
bar.room, where the two men shook hands.
They we're aftcrward almost inseparable
friends
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-09-06

and his face and hands plontously
bedaubed with the PHOSPHORUS of the
m atches.
Nearer he came. Three hollow
groaps broke the stiffness of the night.
and with a shrek the makeup
vaulted over the hedge and confronted
the momentarily Mortified victim.
But the ''victim" did not fade and
die away amidst the bloom of June
roses; he simply, but quickly. raised
his walking stick and brought it down
with such a resounding thwack on the
cran'u of the bogus ghost" that de-
prived her majesty excise OF the servi-
ces OF young and energetic officer for
the space of two weeks.
Not far from the town of A, in
the. state OF New York. near the Mo-
ha wk. a clump of trees adorns bend
in the road. This place came to be
avoided by travellers around that sec
ton of the country. Nor were the
stories circulated by gossps; persons
of responsibility and undoubted vera
city told of ghost to be seen and a
my sterious voice TO be heard at this
Dpot and, horrors of horrors. this spec
ire was not of the usual order. 1t dis
dained gliding with nosless steps over
mother earth but disported itself
among the branches of the tree. This
circumstance excited so much comment
that the superintendent of tho police.
one moonlight night proceeded to the
place accompanied by n friend who
had witnessed the illusion.
There it was. up q tree, and waving
long and shadowy arm rs # beckon-
ing them ON.
Wat here" said the officer. land
watch, am going to solve this y
He advanced rapidly thirty or forty
feet. but the ghost had disappeared in
stanter.
''ls it still there?' he asked his COM
rade. "Still there" answered back a
mocking voice from the trees,
The civilian urged retreat an d be-
ing superstitously inclined aske d if
the officer was not satisfied and intima
ed that seeing was believing
The officer was practical and more.
over exper ence had made him a stead
fast unbeliever. Again he advanced
boldly to the tree. Her lad ship. the
ghost again disappeared most myster-
iously. but this did not deter him from
following out his object Drawing Il
pocket knife he grasp two or three of
the branches of the tree which he had
marked as the one the appearance in
habited. and severed them.
You nave cut off her head" shout
ed the man who was watching about
fifty yards away.
"Cut off her head" came the reply,
in ghostly accents.
The mystery was solved The moon
shining through the interstices of the
branches. formed representation of q
woman's head and arm. The voice. too,
was easil, accounted for on trial. 1t
was found to be an echo from an OLD
house near by. Louis Giro ic!e.
Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1888-09-06

Occasionally one MS thrift y man
thai does not be leye in letting he right
hand know what the left hand doe h. Such
an one lives in he shade o. h Ca skiils.
lie heard hat wa er could be purl ed by
lime, so he emp led barrel into his well
AMI blissfully Y al ed he time the wa or
should lear. The DIR, ness of he sea on
left only hree fee OF we er in the well,
and concluding no 10 te outdone by
mo her nature he has been selling a goo |
ar icle f viii ewash his ne ghbors
two buckets for cent, and wa ks mile
and half to he creek for drinking wa er
for his family.