The Press., 1888-04-12

bowed, and the gentleman he took of hia hat to her as polite aa a basket of chips. ''Now," thinks I, sis good time to show my manners, and whined oil my cap and tucked it under my arm, the way the little milk boys down in Stafiordville ustcr the minute they stepped into your house. I never seen her before, but she looked terrible tickled to see me. I s'poss I am pretty good lookin'. Every body seems to like me.
 But it was after nine, with all the fuss and feathers to get there, and thought of what Bridget sang to me
 of there's one thing in all the wor-ruld hate, Its the Gpalpeen foreyer'n etarnAlly late."
 "Good morning, Master Ditto. You're dilatory this mornin'," says the dentist
 didn't know what he meant by that, but wasn't goin' to Let on that didn't know. He looked so nice and pleasant I thought it must mean something good, % l said
 "Am I? I'm glad to hear it. was kinder .frdid you'd be mad cause want here sooner"
 Then he looked comical, and set down in hIs-I don't know what you call it. chair, | s'pose, nd be turned & crank or somethin' nd let me down a peg or two, nd leaned my head against that little thing that's got all hollowed out jest eI- actly the right shape, hRvin' SO many heads squeezed up against it, s'pose.
 You'd better believe I wished twas over with. asked the man if he wasn't afraid he'd break 1t gettin' the fillin' out But he only laughed and said, Why, the ill- ing isn't loose in this tooth. Its in the eye-tooth that it's loose"
 "The eye-tooth ?" says I. "Why, thought the -eye-teeth was on the upper jaw. I should call thst-which do yoU call the, stomach teeth2"
 70, that's only an old maids whim- stomach teeth," says he.
 "That SOP / was born and brought up au old maid" says I, "so stomach teeth will do for me. Any how, every body has always called me that, cause I was 10 good, s'pose, and took such good care of my things"
 He didu't look mad, and he didn't look like a mau that would swear at you, but he got of the greatest lingo of cuss words then that ever you ever did hear m all your life.
 "These, says he, "are the multi.cuss beds, s,-and these are the 6y cuss b,ds,- these the in sigh sirs, and these the cuSsed pc tatees."
 "The 1Uhdt z" says I.
 "The cuspidadi, says he. And just about that time there was a man come in to see about putting in a fountain cuss -pie-door whatever that is.
 What lot that dentist must knowl
 Give me you, yet l" l says, "and let the stomach teeth go to Halifax" thought might as well give in, first as last, for he'd begun again 10 tell me lot about the hines, that knew couldn't remember all of if, not if l died for it.
 
 can, please, for I'm in for a good time afterwards, if ain't too late, ," says.
 So he went to work, jest as nice, nd whirled e little square table-like thing with his tools and things on it right up before my face, to have it handy. Then he got s little rubber bib, about siI inches long, I guess, and clapped it over my mouth. 1 wondered what in creation he'd do next, but he crowded the rubber down over and between the teeth, nd then he got some strings, and I wondered whether he was goin' to tie in the filling, or sew it in. But what he did do was to tie up every tooth tight,-yes, put a string around 'em and tied 'em in. And the rest of the rubber bib Tapped up under my nose above and down over my chin below. Then he chucked a nice clean napkin un- der that, and thought I was fixed. But I want, for he slipped out into the side room to tend to the fountain I spose, that was splashin' away in there, all by itself, and when he came in he olapped some- thing into my mouth that begun to blow cold air into it.
 "What under the sun l" thinks l. "Is he afraid I'll raise Cain, when he gets to goiu', or what? and can it be that's the way they give laughin' gas, and stuff"
 But couldn't hardly say 'boo," fixed up in that style-should you think could ? So he got to work. 'Twan't any thing at all, tskin' out that old filling ; but "excavatin' the eoavlty"-thRt takes tho cake. But be was just as careful as he could be, not much like that old putty head that went at it. hammer and tongs, as if he'd just as soon take your head of : as not.
 No, sir this feller he was jest as gentle ! and once, when he let somethin' slip, ) s'pose I Iscringed and he looked as if he was awful sorry, he did, and asked if he hurt me. waited a spell, but after awhile ) managed to get out "N-oW That might have been a little bit of q flo, but knew he didn't want it to hurt, l so it didn't, much.
 We'll, he kept talkin' away to me just as pleasant, so't shouldn't mind so much , about the grindin' nd buzzin' and diggin' pOeos OSt yOus uo hshcd mC-NNil- } some less tban 8 thousand questions. But won't fib about that, for amt sure. Might have been less, and it might have been more, aud all could answer would
 be, "M hn," or "M.hm," as folks do, 3 sometimes, you know, when they are too
 lazy to say "yes" and "no." 7 And that little cold air contrivance kept
 sizzlIn' away in my mouth, aud after got 2 used to it I saw what twas for. Instead l of blowin' in cold air, it kept suckiu' out ) the water out of my mouth, instead of let- 2 tin it run all down your chin. Saliva, the r dentist called it. He said he invented it himself-not the saliva, but the machine. , asked him afterwards how he knew 1t 3 would, suck, and he said be put it in a 3 tumbler of water, and OiLLed it to draw l the water all out, and it did. Its A little l crooked tube, made of silver or something
 crooked just right to hang over your jaw, aud beyond that it is rubber, or some. 7 thing like that. Cute Aud that buzzn' machine-I call It-that you make go with your foot-that goes with tube, too, and 1t seems as if it would bore right through your head, don't it? But it don't, and af. } ter he got that cavity excavated, he whisk- cd the tools offn that little table quicker'n n I.A A..al, o,.I Al.