The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1888-08-14

In all this discussion about the tariff
it seems strange that the sugar men have
not as yet demanded any tariff on sand.-
Boston Post.
New Haven Ne,cs 1t is said that
San Francisco has had over four hundred
earthquakes since her first settlement If
this is true she must feel rather unsettled
still.
Philadelphia Worth .4merican.. One
Of the Partisan fads is to wear ears of corn
on the head. The style elsewhere is to
wear the ears on the head and the corns
OF the feet.
Wife" You say you shot this
duck yourself, John? cant find no
marks on it," Husband (who hadn't
thought of that =" Well-er-my dear,
the bird was very high up, you know,
and perhaps the fall killed it. "-Lite.
Somebody says " it is better to be
able to say no than to be able to read
Latin. Young Shortleigh, who asked
his girl to marry him few days ago,
says he would much rather she had been
able to read Latin.-Norrtsto,cn Herald
-Smithville Ne,cs.' Brother, don't
stop your paper just because you don't
agree with the editor. The last cabbage
you sent in didn't agree with US either,
but we didn't drop you from our subscrip
ton list on that account.
Passenger = "What's wrong 2"
Brakeman" The train behind us can't
slow up. There'l be an awful collision :"
Passenger" And I'll be killed. That's
just my luck. | WAS foolish enough to
buy a return ticket. " = Detroit Free
Press.
At the seaside: She (bathing for
the first time in her new suit)-" Why,
Charles, how strange. 1t feels just as
though | had my shoes on. y" Charles
Hold up your foot and let's See" She
Screaming -" Why, it's a crab -
Burlington Free Press
Hon Tin Campbell to Hon. Tom
Reed" What do yez think av the Dem
ocratic ticket: 2" Hon. Tom Reed (sen-
tentiously)-" As an Englishman, | am
pleased What do you think of the Re-
publican ticket 2" Hon. Tim (sarcasti-
cally)-" Ez Chanyman, | rejice. y
"A "legitimate transformer recen-
unsuccessful starring toar in Shaksperian
characters. 4 friend accosted him, and
asked him what luck he had had.
Luck, J." the actor replied why, down
there in Jayville, Jay county, played
to four kerosene lamps, and two Of those
went out after the first act. "-Erchdnge
"A little fve-vear-old in Washington
evidently appreciates her mother, be-
cause she is her mother, but the sentiment
is not unmixed with self-appreciation.
Mamma, she said the other day at the
table, "guess what lady said about you
at Salle's party last night. " "What
was it, dear?" "She said you were the
sweetest little girls mother in Washing
ton. - Youths Companion.
-"Rose Kacktus," exclaimed the
gloomy lover, "since you won't marry
me Pve nothing to live for. I'm going
to shoot myself :" ''Let me see your
pistol, Mr.. Lariat. He reluctantly
showed it to her. "Shoot yourself with
a 22-calibre pop?" said the beautiful
Arizona maiden contemptuously, as she
looked at the weapon. elf you do, aud
it hurts any, come to me and will give
you a piece of court plaster. - Chicago
| Tribune.
Happiness is the golden fruit that
ripens from the seed of truth in the gar
den of duty under the cultivation Of good
ness. No other seed will produce il
nowhere else will it grow; and by no
other means will it come to ripeness
Sow wild oats, and the harvest will be
shame and trouble and bitterness of heart
Go outside of duty, and truth is bar
rem plant with plenty of flowers but ne
fruit. Work without prayer and faith
and love to God and men, and truth viii
start but never ripen its fruit.-Dr. An
derson, in Florida CAristian advocate.