Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1888-05-10

lately distributed by me to the deserving
poor"
''And you won't take any less?" said
MacTaggart, as he stretched out his
reluctant hand and deposited FIVE guineas
upon the physicians table. as the pro-
cess very painful, doctor?" he said.
There are two means of achieving the
object" said the physician, who took
no notice of the fee. "The one is purely
mechanical; it is gradual extension; con-
siderable physical pain has naturally to
be endured. The other course, which is
equally efieacious and quite painless, is
by means of a medicated bate, but DO
more than four inches increase in height
can be obtained"
II shall be perfectly satisfied, doctor,
with four inches" VERY good young
man, very good. You know your own
| business best. R5tire behind that SCREEN
aivest yourself of your apparel; in a few
moments all will be prepared. So power
full are the effects of the drugs that your
clothing were it exposed to the potent
vapors, would be utterly destroyed
| Strip, young man." said the doctor
mphatically, and he pointed to the
screen.
| Mr.. MacTaggart retired behind the
screen and did as he was bid, and the
venerable benefactor of the human race
disappeared into the bathroom, The
| first thing that Dacre did was to empty
his bottle of turpentine into the bath,
and then turned on the hot water till the
bath was nearly full.
care you prepared, young mani" he
cried in loud voice, as he re-entered the
eception-room.
''I'm quite ready, SIR" said Mr.. Mac
Taggart, from behind the screen, 81 can
smell the potent odors of the drugs, even
| here"
Don't trife, boy.,' cried the Ameri
can physician; 'rake your watch with
! you and proceed to the bath. You will
find it very hot, and the odor OF the
Eastern halsams is pungent; but do not
let that deter you; enter it as speedy as
possible, for the hotter the bath the more
rapid is the osseous change. Remain ex
tended in that bath and perfectly STILL
and every five minutes by your watch
and not more frequently on any account
let your head disappear beneath the
| balsamic film with which the surface of
the water is covered. Do not speak, and
breathe only through your nose.
VIII vain you VIGIL Gne PIoCeSS 10 GULL
| plete."
Mr.. MacTaggart entered the bath
room, watch in hand. The odor of the
| Oriental balsams made him sneeze VIC
| lently, the water was evidently very hot
and was covered by thick oleaginous
film. But young Mr.. MacTaggart had
| paid his five guineas, and was determin-
ed to have his moneys worth. After a
| LITTLE time he pDtRred Tn hath
| Every five minutes his head disappear
ed beneath the streaming oily surface.
| In the meantime Cecil Dacre was nor
idle. He rang the bell; Pippa and her
mother appeared; the one carried lit
tie charcoal barrier and a fat-iron, the
other very small work-bag and big
pair of scissors. They laughed immod-
erately as they sat to work upon the
clothes of the young Scotchman. Three
! inches were cut off from the trousers
| legs, the sleeves of his coat and of the
shirt; Pippa's mother worked with a will
with her needles to refashion the extrem
tiles of the garments, and as she finish
ed each, Pippa herself carefully pressed
! the newly made seams with a hot fiat
iron. Then the physician dismissed his
| two assistants. he flung open the bath
room door and addressed the bather.
"Come forth, young man." he said
''You entered that bath miserable and
puny specimen Of humanity; you will
leave it in all human probability, we'll
grown youth, of prepossessing appear
ance."
Mr.. MacTaggart did as he was bid. He
dried himself to the best of his ability
but the balmy odors of the balsams of the
East still clung to his hair. No sooner
was he dressed and had emerged from be
hind the screen, than the mock doctor ad
dressed him.
young man." said he; and bis voice wa;
apparently choked by emotion, ''behol6
the result of the wondrous bath of Box
hara. There is considerable change, ]
think" he said solemnly.
Mr.. MacTaggart had evidently grown
out of his clothes; his arms and legs pro
truded in portento1s manner.
"Don't thank me-" continued the Amer
lean physician hurriedly: "don't thank me
but hasten home to bed, to sleep off the
effects of my potent medicaents."
Mr.. MacTaggart bowed as gracefully a:
he could, and left the premises.
The very first person he met in the
street was his acquaintance Orlando P
Jones. MacTagg arts appearance wa;
sufficiently striking. His ordinary
straight red hair was curly and extremely
o6oriferous from the effects of the turpen
tine. HIS face and hands were the color
of boiled lobster, and his eyes were
bloodshot from the same cause.
Goodness me-" said Jones, II shouldn't
have known you. What have you beer
doing to yoursclf?"
"Don't ask me said Mac Taggart; "my
happiness is too great for words" and his
scarlet face was Illuminated by a smile OF
celestial beauty
Before he reached his own house he had
met at least twenty OF his acquaintance
Each one interviewed him with a similar
result.
But the cup of happiness was rudely
dashed from his lips when his extremely
PLAIN and elderly sister, Miss Flora Mac
Taggart, on her arrival, addressed him in
| these indignant words:
"Eh! Donald. man, it is fou We are? or
simply fatuous? that ye have been max
ing a Merry Andrew yerself by cuttin
doan yer cleithes."
In vain the brother explained his visit
to the doctor.
Then the secret came out, and Mr.. Mac
| Taggart and his sister left Naples for
Rome within twenty-four hours.-Belgra-
via.
Hot Water for Plants.