davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1888-05-02
She Thought So Too.

He-Do you know, Miss Mabel, have dis covered why my brain is so activea She No, MT. Minuswit, what is your theory? He It is because so often start train of thought She-Ah, yesl The "Limited. ."- Tid- Bits
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1888-05-02
The wor1d,s Way.

My friend, don't forget this-if you lie down, the world will go out of it's way to drive over you; but if you stand up and look oevere, it will give you half the road at least Uncle Ezek
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1888-05-02
N. H. & H. Railroad Time Table,

APRIL a, 1888.
 Trains Leave Waterbury as Follows: New York-5.ao. sss Io54 a m.: a4a 7.sI D. m. Sunday. AIS D. m
 Return 5. s. a m: 1, 4, 53s m- New Hayen-5ao s.e6. Io.s4 a. m; s<s 7.si pm. Return. 7.l5, e-52 a. m-, l, s9o. 54<5. 7.so pm Bridgeport-5.So, s-e6. io.s4 a. m.; e4a. 7sI; Sun day, {. IS p. m.
 Return 7.I5, s.5e a. m-; asi, s.<e, 7.ss D. m; Sunday, 7-5o a. Ansonia-S.3o ae6. ros4 a. m. axa. ysf n. m: Sunday, AIS D. m-
 Return. 7S 1o33 a. m.: sos sS SIS p m Sunday. S26 a. m- Watertown.65o, s.sa. II -sa a. m.; 4io, eio 7.s5 m: Saturday, BIS p. m-
 Return 6.So, T55 TO- IS a. m: eo7 5ss 6<s p. m- Saturday, 500 p. ID. Thomaston-s4s, l1.17 a. m.; s.57. 7Io D. m.; Sun day, BIO a. m-
 Return. 75s Io-27 a. m.; ala 6.57 D. m: Sunday, $50 p. m. Torrington-SSs, Ii. .I7 a. m: s57 7Io m. sun- day. BIO a. m.
 Return, 7A, Io.oa a. m.; 1.4a, e.ss p. m:
 Sunday, a8 D. m- winsteds<s, 11.l7 a. m-; as7. 7.Io p. m; Sunday 9.10 a. m. Return, 7.Is, s4o a. m; go, s.io D. m; Sun. day, 800 p. m- O. M. SHEPARD, General sup.t CT. HAMPSTEAD. General Pass. Agent
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1888-05-02

Beaded caps are seen again in all their glistening brilliancy and elegance, and one can see with half an eye that they arc "going to be fashionable" Dolly Spanker, at the club, says squaws wore them years ago.
 Too many of the showy and ornamental lamps are made simply to sell, and are of very little use to anybody after few weeks service. This is one of the evil results of the craze in which MT. and Mrs. Veneering have been so deeply interested
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13
How convicts Communicate.

The convicts have no privilege of writ
ing or speaking to each other, but so per-
feet is their system of communicating
with each other that in forming plans to
escape they can agree on time, leaders.
methods and signals. But there is al
ways some convict who, though not in
the plot, learns all about it and tells the
details to the officers. Investigation al
ways brings to light enough incidents TO
convince us that their plans are being
formed constantly. After Warden Patton
took charge, their plans of uniting were
discovered and thwarted in one day.
Warden Patton not long ago had occasion
to order the punishment of convict for
infraction of the rules. The convict
without the knowledge Of his fellows,
was taken to distant part of the prison
where there was not a s'gn of any one
being near enough to learn what took
place. But three minutes afterward ey-
cry convict of the many hundred there
knew not only the punishment, and the
kind. but why, and by whom, and at
whose orders it was inflicted. An ex-
prison official said recently: "Not long
ago took convict to Michigan City
reached the prison about O'Clock in the
evening, after all the convicts had been
locked in their cells No one knew of
my being there but the officer in charge
at that time of night I did not stay
longer than five minutes, but turning
over my prisoner | went to the hotel and
to bed. When came down to breakfast
the next morning there was messenger
from the prison stating that such and
such prisoner wanted to see me. A
half dozen in all wished me to come out
to them. How they knew / was there
nobody knows Prison official are con-
stantly seeing the effects of communica-
ton among the eonvicts, but cannot de-
tect the system. .'-H,diGnapoiis Journal
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13
What Pearls Are.

Costly and lovely though they be pearls
are merely calcareous production-a
sort of morbid concretion found in many
species of the class mollusco-not neces-
sarily in the oyster therefore. Thu
translucent pearl is only the outcome Of a
very simple law-namely that in these
animals the hard part shall accommodate
themselves to the soft. The oyster loves
to be easy, and renders its bed soft and
cosy, albeit its sheets, figura.iyely speak
ing are wet ones. BY its wonderful mu-
Gus it provides against inequality or irri-
tation. Let some matter cause internal
worry, or grain of sand external annoy
ance, and straightway it commences 10
cover over the evil with this calcareous
ex uvium, and 10 and behold, we get our
pearls. This is even better than " out Of
the eater came forth meat" for, as Sir
Edward Home SAYS: THE richest Jewel
in a wornan's crown, which cannot be
initiated by any art of man, either in
beauty of form or briliiancy of lustre, is
the abortive egg of an oyster enveclped
in its own nacre." This term is the
scientific name for the exuvium Just
spoken of, and if pearl be examined by
a good light through a strong glass the
eoncentric layers, like those Of an onion,
may be seen arranged around a very
minute hole wherein the ovum grain of
sand, &C., was first deposited.-Keeos
(EngtqnG) Mercury.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13
Economy of Good Roads.

Ii Is gratifying to find so earnest a
thinker as Professor Ely of John Hop
kins University, urging the economical
advantages of better highways In a
recent article in the Baltimore S,R he
quotes the statement of distinguished
American who has travelled extensively.
to the effect that the public roads of the
United States are the poorest which ex-
ist in any civilized country, so far as he
has observed An estimate made some
years ago placed the saving to the own
srs of horses in Berlin which would be
realized from improved pavements at
over S25 for each horse. Now. if change
to good roads throughout the United
States would save $40 per horse, the total
savings would be over Si00, 900 900, which
is the interest on $1,000 100000. Profes-
sor Ely considers this low estimate, for
he believes there would be easily saw
ing of S25 per horse for the city streets
and SIS per horse for the country roads.
Besides this must be taken into consider
alton the saving to vehicles and horse
flesh and the fact that good roads would
frequently permit the use of one horse in
cases in which two are now required, and
would always permit the use of two
where three are now necessary. He there
fore regards a saving OF SO a horse not
an extravagant estimate. He says that
the first improvement which the great
French reformer Turgot undertook in the
province of which he was Governor, was
the repair of the roads, and that one im-
portant step, without doubt. in raising
Limoges, az one of the wealthiest pro-
vinces in France, was the construction
by Turgot of the excellent highways.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13
She EverIastingly had him.

"Are you in earnest, Mr.. Hankinson ~
The lovely girl who asked this ques-
ton of Mr. Iiankinson sat behind the
centre table with her hands in her lap
and regarded the young man intently.
"In earnest, Irene q heexclaimed, pale
with emotion and chronic dyspepsia,
"the whole happiness of my life is wrap
ped up in your answer TO the question |
have asked. If you will trust your future
in my hands, my life shall be devoted to
the task of making you happy. 1t will
be my sole aim to shield you from the
rude blasts of adversity, to smooth your
pathway through the world and TO inter-
pose my right arm between you and ev-
cry danger that threatens to oGisturb your
peace, and"
"lf listen to your suit, Mr.. Hankin-
son., interrupted the youpg lady, casting
her eyes with some timidity ani confu-
sion to the floor, "you may regret it some
day. You would find me ignorant of the
practical duties OF housekeeping and
without
Practical duties of housekeeping ~
broke in the enthusiastic youth ''you
will have no practical duties of that kind.
As my wife you shall not be a drudge.
You shall be the queen of my home.
You consent. do YOU not, my dar-"
~Wait moment, my dear Mr.. Hank
inson. am afraid you would find me
thoughtless and extravagant in a great
many things"
"Extrayagant. Irene, it will be the joy
Of my life to provide you with whatever
may crafty your slightest whim. You
can never make request of me that /
would not rejoice to anticipate and grant
beforehand"
and you would he willing TO spend
all your evenings at home 81
my angel, l never would want to
spend them anywhere else"
"You would never break my heart by
joining club or becoming a drinking
man."
"Hear me, Irene. promise never to
do either"
"Let me see," said the young lady,
meditatively ;"I think that IS all-O!
you viii agree to have the word obey
left out of my part of the marriage ser
vice, will you, Mr.. Hankinson?"
''0beyl Ha, ha? Why, my own, GER
tainly. am even willing to promise to
obey you"
'.Then. Marcellus," said the lovely giil,
as she lifted full-grown phonograph off
her lap, locked it carefully in drawer of
the secretary that stood against the wall,
turned up the gas. and beamed in
sweet. yet business-like manner upon
the terror-stricken young man, Il am
yours"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13
A Bright Pupil.

"Hello, Blank" said Boston man 20
one OF his friends the other day, hear
you are attending this memory school.
What do You think of it, anyhow"
"Greatest discovery of the age" says
Blank, enthusiastically 81 tell you it's
big thing, sir; mighty big thingl
Why, two months ago | couldn't remem-
Der anything a day. Couldn't remember
names and dates half day, even, and
now, since I've taken up this Loisette
system, / can't forget anything No, sir,
actually can't"
That SO? | must look into the thing
myself. What's the teachers name -"
~0h, his names e's-um-um-letm me see
Wha. is his maine know it as well az
] know my own. I've heard it forty times.
Old sort of a name, but common enough,
too. It's-it's-I had it right at my
tongues end a second ago. Its some
thing like-like-hsnged if remember
what it is. l never could remember
names. ANYHOW =,
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13
Luck Of a Miner.

James Bailey, of Shamokin, Pa, has
fallen heir to 81 100000 left to him by
the death of his uncle, William Constein
Munsen, Of Newport, England Bailey
has a wife and seven children to take
care of For the past fonr months he has
missed many meal to appease the hun
ger of the little ones. He went on strike
with the rest OF the Philadelphia and
Reading miners in January. and, through
misunderstanding, did not secure his
place when the strike was declared off.
Failing to obtain work at the coIiers, he
was compelled to seek aid from the poor
district Last Saturday he received a
letter from an attorney 10 England in
forming him Of his lucky windfall
Bailey resided in England twenty years
ago and was the deceased unclc's private
secretary. Falling in love with comely
sewing-girl he was married to her despite
his uncle's earnest protest and threats of
disinheritance. After the marriage he
and his bride bade adieu 10 England and
sailed for the United States. Arriving in
this country and falling to secure work in
the cities, Bailey came to the coal regions
where he has since resided. When Bal
ley was apprised If his uncle's legacy he
simply remarked; 'Well, this morning
we had bread and water for breakfast,
and we'll eat chicken, for the first time in
many months, for dinner" Next week
the ex-coal digger will sail for England
TO take possession of his riches. He is
an intelligent man, aged Ss years, and
enjoys good health.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13
Correction and Retraction.

Last week we had brief item to the
effect that Major Hanback,, our efficient
register of deeds, had got staying drunk.
destroyed bushel or two Of valuable pa
pers, had two fights, and then gone home
to smash his cook stove and lick his wife.
Next day Major Hornhack called at this
Office and not only subscribed FOR the
Kicker for himself, but sent two copies to
friends in the East, paying US s. in cash
We therefore desire to correc. the item of
last week The Major was not drunk.
1t was simply an attack Of vertigo to
which he is subject He vas never drunk
in his life, and more efficient public Of
ticIal or a kinder husband and father can
not be found on the face Of this globe.
We shall make further corrections from
time to time as the victims come in and
subscribe.--AraTa Kicker.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13
Care of MIX in the Diaries.

The management of the milk is OF the
greatest importance, and this is the point
in the conduct of the business where
most Of the losses and failures are made
Every attention should be given to In
sure The most perfect cleanliness, to the
comfort of the cows in hot weather, and
to cooling the milk as soon as II has been
drawn from the COW. When milk Is
cooled to a low temperature and then
warmed, it sours very quickly. This
souring can 90 on in sealed bottles, when
it is supposed TO be quite safe from change
and the dairyman is much disappointed
10 find his agent complaining ofthe milk
souring when he felt sare it was beyond
all danger; the very security he depend
ed upon being the source from which
the unexpected mischief arises. The
cooling of the milk then becomes a mat
ter of paramount importance. lee water
is too cold, and produces the very mis-
chief it is intended to prevent. Fifty
five degrees is low enough, and sixty viii
do very well if the milk is not exposed
10 unusual risks in the transportation.
There are various methods of cooling
milk. The most usual one is to put the
cans, as soon as milk has been strained
into them, into tank or pool of cool wa-
ter, or into well from which water is
drawn for use and is so kept fresh and
cool An iron frame, in which cans are
placed, is lowered into the well by an
ordinary windlass, and the cans are kept
there from early morning when the cows
are MIXED until night, when the milk is
shipped. The EVENINGS milk is treated
in the same way, but is not mixed with
the mornings milk Milk is always ship
ped in the evening, so as TO be ready for
the early mornings delivery. Asthe cans
often remain on the platform of the rail-
road depot for considerable time before
they are put on the cars. it is advisable
to have a dry, clean blanket, conspicu-
ously marked with the shippers name,
thrown over his cans, by making a suita-
BILE arrangement with the conductor Of
the milk train, the cans may also be pro-
tected in the same way in the car, and
thus arrive at their destination several
degrees cooler than if they had been un-
protected. The great point to observe is
not cool the milk too low, and to cool it
as soon as possible after it is strained
airing it well by pouring it through the
strainer raised above the pail The deep
setting milk pals, eight or eight and a
half inches in diameter, are convenient
for cooling the milk in, and if the tenn
perature is not lower than ffty-five de-
grees there will not he much cream rise
during the day. To prevent the cream
rising the milk should be stirred gently
two or three times during the day A
tank of water cooled 70 the right point
by ice is very suitable and convenient
but thermometer should be used. to be
sure that the cooling is not carried below
the safe point-Amerjean Agricuiarid.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13
The One He Forgot.


John. would like to invite my friend
Mrs. smalley, this evening will you be
able to be in /?
No, my dear; must attend a meet
ing of the knights of Honor tonight
well, tomorrow evening""
81 have the Ancient Order Of United
Workmen, and YOU know
What about Wednesday evening?
"Oh the Odd Fellows meet that
night and on Thursday / have a meet
ing of the Chosen Friends to attend
On Friday, the Royal Templars; on Sat
urday there's special meeting Of the
Masonic Lodge, and couldn't miss that;
and then Sunday-let me see-what is
there on Sunday night, my dear?7
"The Grand and Ancient Order of
Christian Fellowship"
Why, have forgotten; am I men,
Der of that-let me see"
"But you have forgotten another So
ciety, John, of which you were once
member
Whats that?"
~Your wife'sl"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13
Red Tape Floored Him.

\ prank was played upon one of the
new members of Congress the other day
by couple Of young ladies' that broke
him all up. He has lodgings in one of
the long row Of fac-simile houses on East
Capitol street, and, fearing that he would
forget his number, he tied piece of red
tape on the gate as he wended his way to
his 5000 seat. A pair Of pretty, mis-
chievous maidens witnessed the proceed
ing from an adjacent window, and wick
edly resolved to have fun. They tripped
out a few minutes later, aud. taking the
red string with them, tied it on a gate
two or three numbers above, and return
ed to their elegant eyrie.
About five o'clock the member came
sauntering down the sidewalk in search
of his string. 1t caught his eye, and his
expression frightened and his step grew
elastic at the thought Of his cosy
chamber. He walked to the front door,
and, finding it unlocked, walked upstairs
to his room as he thought, and made
himself at home. He pulled his shoes
off and was warming bis toes, when in
walked a lady, and seeing the shaggy
stranger she demanded the why's and
wherefores. The gallant member thought
she was ''guying' him and undertook to
joke her.
She would not have it, however, and
had to threaten 10 call a cop" before
she could speed the parting guest. The
whole household had gathered in the
meantime, and the member put on his
number mines in confusion worse con-
founded, and cussed" the day he was
sent to Congress. He hires boy to take
him home now. Another case Of red
tape,
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13
The Remarkable Cures

Which have been effected by Hoods
Sarsaparilla are sufficient proof that this
medicine does possess peculiar curative
power. In the severest cases of scrofula
or salt Iheun, when other preparations
had been powerless, the use of Hoods
sarsaparilla has brought about the happi-
est results. The case Of Mrs. Sarah C..
Whittier, of Lowell, Mass, who suffered
terribly from scrofulous sores that Of
Charles 4. Roberts, Of East Wilson, Y.
u. who had thirteen abcesses on his
face and neck that OF Willie Duff, of
Walpole, Mas, who had hip disease and
scrofula 50 bad that the physicians said
he could not recover, are few Of the
many instances in which wonderful cures
were effected by this medicine.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13
BIDDY's PHILOSOPHY.

What would do II you was dead?
And when do you think of dying9
I'd stand by your bed. and hold your head,
And cry, or pretend to be crying
There's many a worse man nor you
II one knew whore 10 find him
And mcbbe many better. too,
With money to leave behind him
Butyou. il was dying to-day.
Il saw yen now when you kissed her9
tell yon, Pat, what you'd be at
You'd marry your wildly sister
You'd make an illigant corps,, indade,
Sleeping so sound aud siiddy
IL You could see yourself as you laid.
You'd want 20 come back TO Blddy
You would be dressed in your sunday best,
Aud tidy as ] could make YOU,
With a sprig OF something on yonr breast.
And the boys would come to wake you
Bat yeu, If We're dead in your stead,
DO You think never missed hcrgl
tel you, Pat. what you'd be at
You'd marry your widdy's sister,
When you was under the sod. I'd sigh,
And-if could do without you-
Aebbe I've strapping lad in my eye
Ncald como and talk aboIt you.
little courtin would he diyeriin'.
A kind voice whispering Biddye o,
kiss on the sly, for what's the hurt in
man eonsolinga wildly
But YOU, before was dead al all,
tNow don't deny that you kissed herr
tell you Pat, wha; you'd be at
You'd marry your widdys sister.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13
BlESECKER & SNYDER.
EDUCATION AT SMALL COST
A GREAT OPPORTUNITY.
CENTRAL
State Normal School,
Lock Haven, Clinton County, Pa.

Winter term of y weeks opens Tuesday Jan. B.
spring term Of II weeks opens Tuesday. March
=. lsSs.
Begiaai.s nth The WiFa Term, jan 2s-
lsss.
Heat, furnished room. and good board, for only
= - a week
I,iifiou. - 2s a week
10 those y no intend 10 teach the State gives
30 cents a week as aid. This can be suotraeiea
from the cost Of tuition
BESIDES he weekly aid the STATE gives so at
The nes cost for heat, furnished room. board
and initiou tor the winter term 81 Il weeks =
only S. ard for he spring term OF II weeks Oii'
Those who pas their Junior Examination next
spring and enter the senior Class, can attend a
whole year OF - weeks al the net cost of only
$50 - provided they graduate and receive tne
weekly aid Of % cents a week and the - dollars
This i an opportunity that should be improved
by ever one who looks forward 70 teaching a. a
me faculty. OF IN. Central state Normal school
j. composed Of specialists IN their several depart
meflts
Four Of the instructors ere honored gTasiua;es
Of Colleges The school possesses rare cabinets
and valuable apparatus for iilnstrating tbe SCI
enccS.
ner OF the best training schools.
AZ the last session Of the Legislature the Cen
tral state Normal school received tHo apprpprl-
atoms aegfesating eA. This moiler has been
used IN putting the building IN excellent coisoi-
ton
Hysrassts water closets and bath roons may
he found on the different floor. All rooms aTe
completely furnished The sfudenf should eriilg
his own towels and napkins. Washing may Dc
obtained in the baiiding az a small cost
students may enter at any time. lock haven
l. accessible by nail from all directions
For the beauty and healthfulness of It's loca tion
the Central State Normal school Is admired and
praised.
We wiz beglad 10 correspond win any who
are interesfes ~
Choice roofus rtserFed on application SIt-
DgyTs PREPARED FOR C0LLf6E Address.
JAMES ELDoy. A. NJ. Principal.
oensrui lsass Normal srA~a.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13

How DIDO, Greenbag? see yon won
your case in that suit of Ketchum vs..
Grabbum. Perfect success, wasn't il -
Yes, won the case; but | don't con-
siler it perfect success, by any means"
Why. did Grabbum appeal" No;
but find that Ketchum has 800 cash
left II I had known it | would have
postponed the case a couple of months
longer."-SpriaQ6sld T,,ioa.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13
A Good Legacy

To bequeath to. your children, is a
strong, clean, pure constitution-beiter
than wealth, because it will never prove
a curse. You cannot give what you do
not possess, but mothers will find in DIR.
Pierce's Favorite Prescription wonder
ful belp-correcting all weakness, bring
ing their systems into perfect condition,
so that their children, untainted, shall
rise up to call them blessed
There is not druggist in all the land
But always keers stock on hand.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13

After using Ely's Cream Balm for two
months was surprised aud delighted to
find that the right nostril which was
closed up entirely for over twenty years,
was open and free as the other, and can
use it now as ! could not do for many
years. | feel very thankful.-R. II.
Cressengham, 275 18th st., Brooklyn.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13
A PuzzIer.

Little girl Cooking at a one-legged
mani Oh, mamma, Where was he
made? ?"
Mother" Made in Heaven, my dear =
Little girl" Why don't he go back
and get finished 2"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1888-06-13

A Brooklyn tailor warranted a coat
not to wear shiny. 1t began to shine
like new tin pan after few weeks
wear, and the owner went back and broke
the tailor's jaw, and had TO pay 500
damages.