St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-03-11
TEETH FILLED WITH GOLD.
The Chicago Police Haven't Time
to Hunt fOr. MurdererT aScNtt

The Chicago Police Haven't Time
to Hunt for Murder er Tascott.
Chicago Times.
There was an air of intense mystery
about police headquarters yesterday.
Acting General Superintendent Hub
bard paced up and down his room.
''Hush," said Clerk Brennan to by
stander in the ante-room, "don't talk so
loud. You'll interrupt his train of
thought"
"Oh," said the other, II didn't know
that train was made up. There has
been strike on that road for several
| years.
"Sh-h-hH' exclaimed George Buckley,
she thinks he's thinking
"Blesyhis dear st. Caroline'S court
heart" said lounger, Il do hope he
WON'T overwork his brain. And there's
Bonfield, too. Have you noticed the
wild activity on his part lately?" Just
then patrolman came in breathlessly
from the street.
Chief! chiefr' he cried. .sUfficer
Nick Graffenheimer's caught" Be-
fore he could say more he was seized by
Hubbard, who rushed him into the pri.
vate office.
"Well, well, man-speak out! DON'T
stand there gasping like black bass
just landed. Go on and tell how he
caught Tascott, while L fill out this
check for the noble policeman. Now the
press cannot howl any longer at our in
efficiency. Speak out man,
eff you'll gimme a chance, was 60
ing to tell you that Officer Nick Gaffen-
heimer had caught his foot in a
frog down in the Alton tracks near
Twelfth street." There was sound
of paper being torn to shreds and the
next moment the patrolman came out of
the Office propelled by the substantial
boot of the chief. Inspector Bonfield
came along and had consultation with
the chief.
as that list ready?" asked Hubbard.
"What list?" said Bonfeld.
''That list of men with gold-filled
teeth"
my secretary is working on it now"
"And the men with gold-headed
canes?'
''They have all been arrested. The
armory is packed"
Q"'Tis well.'
A newspaper man walked in.
"Most potent, grave, and reverend
seiginor," he said, II crave yourihigness'
pardon for my presumption, but can
you inform me if any of your men have
discovered anything"
you've come to the wrong shop.
You ought to know by this time that
nothing is discovered in this depart
ment."
''Well, have you caught"
''None of my men ever caught any
thing except Larry Doolan. of West
Twelfth street. He caught q cold, but
then it was an old and infirm cold, and
Larry made sneak on it. He was dis
charged for catching it, however. /
will say that for the department.
''By the way, George" said Bonfieid,
returning. ''dO you spell clews with a
&c or kip" The chief hesitated and
then said:
''Well, that is matter of TASTE"
"Thanks," said Bonfeld, retiring
again.
"Now," said Hubbard to the reporter,
''you must go away; you bother me.
Don't you see I'm thinking! George"
to Buckley, don't let any more Of these
newspaper fellows in to see me.''
''But, chief" said the reporter, chow
about all those South side burglaries?"
Pooh! How do you expect me to
bother my head about few paItry
burglarieS when L have to arrest so
many men with gold-tilled teeth?" and
the chief, lighting "HacEman's De-
light" disappeared into his Office and
was soon buried in the eXcitements of
Monsieur Lecocq."
Tascott is still at large. The police
would be ever so much obliged if he
would kindly send them his address.