Idaho semi-weekly world. [volume] (Idaho City, Idaho Territory) 1875-1908, 1888-07-20
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LIFE AND MANNERS.
Traits whose Possession VIII Make Man
Gentleman wherever He May Bs.

Tact is a product Of good feeling
and quick observation. Essential to IL
Is sympathy with Others, and it is es-
sential to true courtesy. No man by
merely learning rules of etiquette can
acquire habits Of courtesy. Even If he
does learn the rules and obey them. he
will be angular. unnatural. cold. His
actions will not be the product of an
inward feeling. They will, therefore,
not be the expression Of his own nature.
His love will always be with dissimula-
ton. The foandation Of true courtesy
IL the law. Thou shut love thy neigh
Dor az myself the rule Of true courtesy
is, do unto others as you would tha.
others SHOULD do unto you" The
King who violated the most alphabetic
law Of etiquette. By pouring the tea
from his cup into his saucer 70 cool
and then drinking it from his saucer,
! in order 10 give countenance to a guest
I who had done 80, while the courtiers
laughed in their sleeves at his ignor-
ance. exhibited model Of courtesy.
because he showed peri ection Of tact
Courtesy is simply love applied in
social life to the conduct of small
affairs. Good feeling and good sense
4 underlie almost all rules of courtesy.
/ The first thing. therefore, for one to
do who wishes to develop courteous
habit is to develop good feeling and
good sense. The truth finds express
/ sion in the Greek original rendered in
our English Bible. be courteous; it is
literally be friendly minded. All true
courtesy is the product Of friendly
mind. Boorishness is product Of
sel6shDess far more than product of
ignorance; or az least product of that
ignorance which is itself product of
selfshness- / was once at wedding
breakfast in a rural community in the
West. The groom ate in silence the
food that was set before him, dispatched
his meal before the rest of Us were
more than half through, pushed back
his plate, wiped his mouth with the
back of his hand, and. turning to his
bride, said: well, Sally. you may as
well get used to my way at the begin
ming and | always leave the table
when l have got through with my
meal" With these words he went out
to pick his teeth on the door-steps.
leaving his bride with a flushed face
and panied heart, the object of our
commiseration the man was boor
you say Truei What made him a
boor? The fact that he selfishly though
only Of his own comfort 1t never
entered his head to inquire whether
his conduct would be agreeable OF
painful to his bride.
The foundation of courtesy is laid in
the home. If early lessons are no.
taught there it is well-nigh impossible
to compensate for the lack by subse-
quent culture. If the child is taught
to be unselfish. sympathetic, consider
ate of the feelings of others in the
home. he will carry this habit with him
wherever he goes He may be ingorani
of those conventional laws Of etiquette
which vary in different localities. bIt
he will everywhere De recognized a a
man Of good breeding. Thus it is that
courtesy becomes family and even !
national trait The Frenchmeu AMI thu
Japanese are courteous, because they
are trained to consider the feelings OF
others The English as 4 nation ar,
not courteous. Their courtesy is 2
matter of court etiquette, and adjust.
itself according to classes. There i
more conscience on the English side o
the Channel. more courtesy on tht
. French side. So, again, courtesy shows
, itself in certain old families. 1t ha
become = second nature by Ion.
processes of training and inheritance
Nothing can quite take the place 0
this good breeding in producing goo,
manners, for nothing less will max
tact second nature. Courtesy. 70
instance, requires me, If | 90 into
Roman Catholic Church. to bow m,
head when all the worshipers are bow
I ing theirs. l have no right TO impos
my disbelief upon other religious wor
p shippers. and so wound their feeling
aud interrupt their worship. A mem
Der of one school of medicine NAV re
a fuse TO consult with q member o
| another school of medicine, but he ha
no right to do it in discourteous man
= ner-that IS. in way needlessly t.
\ wound the feelings of his brother-man
!. The sum of the whole matter, then, i
this: To be courteous is TO be friendly
minded; it is to have tact; it is to b
+. sympathetic with other people. an
4 observant of their needs, their wishes
( their feelings, and in speech and actio
g considerable of them. If one lacks thi
: spirit of sympathetic consideration, n
i study of rules of etiquette will max
. him truly courteous. If he possesse
= this spirit of consideration. he will
> iustinctively courteous to all men an
/. women in all circumstances, and wi
/, then have oaly to inform himself a. t
il certain general rules of courtesy appli
y cable alike in all localities and station:
!. and as to some specific rules Of etiquett
- which convenience has established i
e special cases AMI in particular localtie
d or for existing social conditions. All tn
Y general rules of courtesy and most Q
e the special rules of etiquette have
!, foundation in common sense as Well a
il in kindly feeling. Lyman Abbot, L
i D., ia Cha,tdWqtsaR.
:, -" What made the Tower of Pts