The Forrest City times., 1888-03-03
noaa Tax. I. F.r.. and Other Things.

My good friend, Mrs. Simpkins, who lives opposite our house. came rushing in yesterday morning and declared that Mir. Simpkius must have had a touch 0t insanity the night before, for never. ln all her born days. had she seen d man 80 Outrageouslv angry, and Mir. Simpkins gwho everybody knows is a member of the church. never cursed in the presence Of hls family befOreiN Explanations follow ed, from which it appeared that Bro. Simpkins had late that evening been called upon for three dollars street tax. What seemed 50 especially burdensOme in his opinion was the fact that he, a pOot man, had to pay just as much as any rich man, while those wealthy ones who cdanced to be a little older than he, had to pay nothing at all. such Is the divine lustness Of Arkan- SaS law, dear brother. Bow m meek submission; if you kick they will fine you. Pa says it's an excellent law. (Hc $ siXty-tWo, and right rich.l Great minds will differ on important sub Jeets. Mir. Simpkius thinks there should be an ad yal0rem road tax, but Pa doesn't.
 The sunshine this week has been giving promise of spring. and. oh. how 1t reminds me of those dear old times when my first sweetheart several springs ago. by the waY) used to say. Jennie. lets go down Go the pond and chunk tue frogs And l used to see how far could lean out over the pond. so as ta make him hold me around the waist to keep me from falling in. Boys are horrible to do such ways. The sun also remiads us that gardening time is coming and it is a very slothful and impr0yident housewife who has no chickens to scratch in the neighbors gardens.
 The II. r. F.. q secret organization among the young ladies. made an at tempt a few days ago to revive from the state or lethargy into which 1t has fallen since early in the winter. No sufficient interest seems to be engen- dered, however, and only one or two of the moving ones were on the ground st the appointed time. Being member of the society myself, l am forced to withhold from the public any of its secret workings, but 1 think l am per mitted to disclose a few facts In rela- ton to 1t which may be of some inter est to readers of THE TIMES. Its primary object-the one thing ill view at it's organizatiOn-Was matrim0ny. Up to the time of its discontinuance last winter no business had been done. When it was proposed to re- viye the suggestion was yentured that we admit young men to membership. This raised quite howl of disgust, for it is well known that man can't keep a secret, and the mysterious proceed ings of our order would soon be public information. The majority of the members therefore indignantly refused to have any hand in it's reorganization
 As business slackens dancing pumps and white fans are again coming to the front. A nice little hop at the Avery opened the spring season. And, by the way. the spring fights have also opened up, and deyotees of the art pugilistie appear in the ranks of cur old and substantial citizens.
 In glancing over THE TIMES my eye chanced to fall upon my own name at the head of a little article, and l was surprised in reading it to discover that "One of the Girls? ?" had taken offense at the mention of baldheads, and seemed. further. to smart slightly that an interrogation point had been in- serted after the misnomer for the fair inhabitants of Forrest City-i. e., girls" l am sure I meant not the slightest disrespect to that mark with which age sacredly brands those whose many years of ''hustling" amid the myriad trials of life entities 10 some especial crown, and certainly l cherish too much awe and regard for that ua- known and sacred mystery, an mmar- ried woman's age, to make it the sub ject of the slightest sarcasm. Consider atiOn fer myself would also suggest due respect upon my part-for l am no spring chicken. 1 can appreciate the feelings of the stricken when a dar! flies home to the hidden heart; there fore, fair girlt9 overlook, l beg, any offense 1 may have committed, and be assured that it was unintentional Neither 1 nor the rest of the world consider it any crime to be old or un- married. or both though the combina- tion may be rather bad.
 1 wonder why one of my bachelor friends called it "Mishtic Seven in- stead of Mystic Seven"
 Tr.N-NrFE OfllTrA