The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-07-28
He ,rad a Menaeerie.

T"PPAJ >" "uhnoWH qUahtities- nav
tried to absorb all the ardent spirits II
several settlements but have never
struck town Of my size yet They'r
roll In BARI or two on me II, spite %
everything I can do.
'one time, mot very long ago. 1 wa.
in Cheyenne Wyo.. and it had been 81
long since had INDUCED In the ruby
that ] was heller clear TO my heels.
felt a great deal like treating myself fol
having been an examDlar of temper
ance for nigh on TO a year, but held
oil most bravely until there seemed to
be Great North American Desef,
down M throat 1 was SO monstfous
dry.
Intending. however, to hold oui
until dried up ind blew away on one
of tho gentle zephyrs Of Wyoming.
strolled ono evening down to a hotel
and soon fell into conversation with an
elderly man whom I met there. He
was magnificent specimen of human.
ity. despite his age. He had long,
white beard. and his silvery hair fell in
half curls upon his ample shoulders.
We talked on the subject of temper:
chce, and be told me that liz believed
in temperance In all things. especially
in the use OF intoxicating beverages.
"Hc hadn't said three words. how
ever, until l knew by his accent and
patois, that he was a Kentuckian.
" Now said he. 4 am always
healthy, and 1 impute the fact TO tenn
pcrance. l make it pint sab, to
drink only sevcnty-and-two times day,
sab. but l have brother who is a very
far drinkah. yit sab. lie is a healthier
man than l am
Thus he went on, and my mouth
begun to wafer I thought that if a
n man of his age could drink seventy
and'two times day and preserve his
health and equilibrium. that l had been
q very sober man all my life and could
certainly take few fingers without
my own serenity. Yet l
knew. within my heart of hearts, that
l was fixing. that minute. to fool my
self agan.
Finally the old gentleman said to
me: 4 gether, sab. from yo' mannah
of speech. that you ar a southern
man, sah.'
Vas, sah,' I replied.
Ell it's far question, sab, what
part of the south ar you from, sahp
he asked.
I'm Kaintuckian, sah.' re-
pl ed.
THE old gentleman lit up all over
and sad: LOCKER hyar, I'm a Kahn
tuck;an. myself, an this var is just
about the time err day that I'm in the
habit of taking something in the ma
lure of st mulatin' beverage. Won't
you walk with me. sab. into the outah
room, an indulge in something of that
character. sah?
Under the circumstances 1 very
promptly responded, Vas, sah.' and
we proceeded toward that portion of
he establishment where common cook
ng. whisky and other elements of dis
urbance, commonly called in that re-
gron conversation water. were vend-
ID. and where headaches and indiges-
ion are thrown in extra
LAS we walked along the old gentle
man placed his arm over my shoulder
N a sort of fatherly way and inquiring-
y remarked:
You like good boss. sah?'
Nobody likes a good boss better
han l do. sab. was the reply.
That's right he returned. That's
Having reached the bar. he looked
1t me. alittle suspiciously. I thought.
rs il, perhaps. l was foolin' him about
being Ka .ntuckian, and he asked:
What are you gwine to choose
'ah, in the way of beverageP
almost ignoring the old gentle
mans question. 1 spoke to the man in
white. behind the counter. and said,
Give me a little clar whisky If you
please
THAT settled 1t. for with plump, re.
onant and able-bodied oath. the old
nan blurted out: You ar a Kahn
uckian, sho' 'nuff,' and he caught me
" both hands. and we became fast
riends. We remained at that bar for
hours and when l started home the
idewalks had waves in them that
eemed to make me sea-sick, but the
I'D man stalked off when he left me at
! corner. and he seemed to walk the
waters like thing of life He didn't
'obble, and floated off toward nv
odging in an almost laundering con-
lition. finally reached the anchor
lge of home. and after having felt
bout all over the steps and the door,
asing and numerous other places for
he key. hole, and having tried every
hing in my pockets, from pencil
harpener to the muzzle of my pocket
.un to turn the bolt of the latch. finally,
y some interposition of that provi-
lence which looks after drunken men,
managed to get into my chamber and
atch the bed as it went sailing around
he room.
The next day, somewhere along to-
Yards the far end of the forenoon, I
rent down to the hotel again, feeling
much as if l had been through a corn
nd cob crushsr. and there was the
White. bearded old gentleman, looking
s fresh and rosy rs tho dewy morn.
le had started me on one of my con-
however, and I kept up
he racket for days and nights until l
egan to see things which were not
here. seemed TO have come sudden
Y and Internationally into the posses
ion of one of the rarest and largest
objections of wild beasts and reptiles
hat had ever seen. If Adam Fore