Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1888-12-13
THEORY AGAINST PRACTICE
Az Instance Where Book learning was
Defective,

Defective.
I'm banged Gp considerable SAID q red
headed yogug naa as ne stood at tue foot If
C9urtlande street, waiting for tbs ferry and
felt Of tic repairs which hal been nut
around on his face in the wav Of courtpas-
ter Am busted pretty unanermously, but
I guess ] can hold out till / strike Jersey
Been in = ilsht" asked a sympathetic by
stander
'Naw II didn't sid started 'nough s, you
could call ight I've been licsed though
and amt tryii' to dodge the issue
What got you into the iioublesn
"Edgereation, sir--readiu' when I orter
bseu in better business; blieyin' let OF
blame fool tue.; jos cause it was in q book.
How was its'
"W'y thia way. Noa SEQ I had one o these
Gre gvnlnez2rGm books and read If. Says
,hg book lise tllis, you see. \ man With his
waist bigger round than bis chest amt no
GOOD physically That's what the book
claimed. He's lible to give out at the
critical moment, says the book. And if
he's fat, went on the book, he's dead
sure to give out az tho critical min
ute HISS short winded and his muscles
is ilabbv, says tile book. lie amt no good on
earth. SAYS the book awful certain, and 10
man needn't he 'fraid to tackle him. He's a
'cumbrapce on the world, says the book, and
lie orr to train and Git down tho size Of hiI
waist aud boom the dermensions Of his chest
fore sorno small man swats him one and
walks on him This was the idea the book
held and took it all in"
Didn't the theory hold good in practiceg7
~ amt been able to see it in that light yet.
I come over from Jersey this morning feelin
pretty O. X by dimensions are all right.
You can crack hick'ry nuts on my chcst--I
ain't short winded Nothing fabby bout my
muscles. don't give out at the critical mo-
rnent, says l. After a while l was up on
Blocker street lookin' in winder watchin'
Frcnchmau cook pan cakes on an iron foot
stocl, eebeu long comes a policeman as big's
a load q hay. Tic tried TO run on me by
telln' me 10 move On | sized him up II
was a foot further round his waist than
round BIS chest If it vas ali inch. He was
fat, too. Consequently, says | to myself,
you'rc nabhg and short winded and, 'boye
Ill, yoail flpnk at The critical moment. Then
SAYS /: GA boss, dry mp or I'll mob your
lie steps up aud sails in, dependin on the
cri-ical moment for him to cave
"ljat lie dida'r d. itta
"Dout know, you see; | was dead at the
critical moment SO couldn't tell. But ! have
nsleaata owiiown notion that lao didn't
couldn't ,w ar TO notlin', but its my 'pinion
that 10 tac critical moment he was walkin'
arouadon rae and reachin' down and poundin'
ms witt a black club bout the size Of a
Lo1caaeT rs mny have siumped at the
critical r.oinent has ia sooner think that he
na5 ti3,ncia oA blasted fool about my size
Garn' sev'ral very critical moments. When
come tot pgt on ny boots which he had
pounded o!la lae Gnd went and bought court
lastee hy tie roll l.ke wall paper am
sow eeiu' ho.1e to burn M green covered
sYok On physical development. ard when l
git my nrsuoa Of the sling shall so to work
asaa a.4l try to forcs some things that
have read Gool-by'-New York Tribune.