Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1888-05-31
CAILGHT.

VI NY d. I'LL, III CiCdI. w I1 NudI
can possibly have happened to bring
such showers of grief to your blue
eyes?"
| started to my feet, half conscious,
half ashamed, as my mOther-in-law's
volt black silk dress rustled into the
koom.
Now be it understood that my
mother-in-law is the dearest old lady
in The world, with silver curls on each
side of her fresh face, loving hazel eyes,
and the purest of contralto voices. She
never NEEDLES, she never scolds, she
never interferes short, she is Just a
nonpareil among women. And in the six
months experience of my married life
/ had already learned to love and
trust her from the very bottom of my
heart.
| looked dolorously up into my
mother-in-laW's face.
Its Jerome's shirts again" sobbed
whats the trouble with them? No,
Jessie, don't CRY, but answer me-" and
she prisoned my hand in hers and
passed one arm encouragingly around
my waist.
''He-he says-they fit like meal
bags l contriyed to utter, with my
face hidden on Mrs Lees shoulder.
Sand I'm sure-I cut them-by the
yery-new pattern and-and tried
every pains with them, even stitching
the bosom myself, because he didn't
like machine work"
''And won't he wear them?n
NO" | responded with 4 fresh burst
of tears.
s'Let me see them," said Mrs. Lee,
senior, and with heart as heavy as
lead brought out the pile of discarded
workmanship.
''They are beautifully seamed,n said
my mother-in-law, critically examining
them, ''and | see no reason why they
should not fit. To tell the truth,
Jessie, | think Jerome is 4 little I'M
reasonable
''Its the second dozen I've made
without suiting him." sobbed /, ''and
he says he shall ask Leonora's husband
to get some made at the great down.
town store where he buys all his things.
And-oh, dear, dear! 1t will mOrtify
me to death!'
''Wait Il minute, my dear, wait!'' said
my mothcr-in-Iaw, patting my head as
if | had been 4 fractions 5-year-
'1What was the especial fault that
Jerome found with these shirts!"
~'Oh, everything"
cs, but what in Particular"
SWELL" | responded with my finger
to my forehead trying to remember,
''he said they had q swelling in the
neck, and Il twitch in the Wristbands,
ba@giness in the bosomS, and"
That's quite enough" said my
mother-in-law, laughing. Il can fancy
exactly how he said it. I've heard
gentlemen complain about their shirt
bosoms before"
Now to take the reader still further in
to my confidence, shirts had been so far
the Scylla and Charybdis of my married
life. All / did had been perfect in
Jerome's eyes, until, one unlucky day,
/ boldly essayed the making of set OF
shirts. All his words had been honey
and sugar, until when he tried on that
first shirt, he gave himself jerk
around as if he were trying to look
over his shoulder, and shouted out:
ts0h, confound that neck-binding! 1t
makes me feel as if l were going to be
hanged
"Jeromew cried l scandalized and
indignant.
do you call this thing a shirt?''
savagely demanded my lord and mas
ter.
Don't it set right?" 1 timidly ques-
toned.
.'Set! 1t sets like a dishrag on a
gooseberry bush"
And my husband tore the offending
garment and hurled it across the floor.
Of course ] was very indignant, and
of course | cried my eyes nearly out,
and then there was reconciliation, and
Ipromised to try again, and my husband
proposed to borrow jenkins pattern.
Mrs Jenkins, he said, always hit it to a
L with the family shirts; and the do
mestic sun shone brighter than before.
But the second attempt proved a
miserable failure, and this, the ''meal-
bag era as my mother-in-law laugh
ingly called it, was the third.
''Oh, | wouldn't wear myself out try
ing. JESSIE said Gala Thorne, who
had been married about the time that
/ was. ''Do as l do-buy your hus-
bands shirts ready-made.n
| shook my head, unconquered
though metaphorically speaking, in
the dust.
81 won't give up so, Gala. If &
woman of 10 years and months cant
make shirt she had better go into an
asylum for incapaDles."
1.-The shirts are all right enough, my
dear; it's the men that are wrong" sale
Gala, laughing.
'.Iwon't admltsuch a thing to the man
/ promised at the altar to love, honor
and obey"
THAT'S all nonsense and chimera,
said Gala, Struggling her shoulders.
Well, let me go on with the story
of the shirts.
Mrs. Lee stayed with me until Jerome
came home to tea, little ashamed, AZ
1 shrewdly supposed, of his recent out
burst of temper. At all events he was
as serene as May morning now.
1--WE were just discussing the sub
ject of your unfortunate shirts, Jerome, y
said his mother, as he was helping hel
the second time TO pineapple marina
lade He colored little.