The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1888-03-22
THE MERRY SIDE!

move out where it is warm?"
-
The record of the prize-ring shows that
beef is better than beans, to fight on.
-.
1t will soon be time for the house plants
to move out, and the family to move in.
The Dow tax has been increased. What
will become of the poor doggery-keeper's
family?
A Catlin, Illinois, barkeeper tried to
poison himself. Of course he couldn't
make it.
Now, wife, if you want to test your
husbands affection, ask him to spade you
garden-spot.
Halstead goes for Gresham for voting
for Tilden. Nearly as bad as voting for
Greeley, Mr.. III.
How sweet and balmy is the warm sun
One would scarcely think it was freighted
with spring fever.
The English papers say Sullivan's pros
tration is pitiful. 1t occurred at the end
of Mitchell's arm.
The Democratic politicians think it
no harm to show themselves-th tariff
has placed linen so high.
The small boy will now get his fishing
line ready. He'll shortly be gettiug ready
some other lynn too.
80
Charles Huff, of Lima, Ohio, fell dead
while fighting a glove fight. Justice
knocked him out.
A witness at Millersburg, Ohio, went
crazy. The cross-examination then pro-
ceeded on equal terms.
The volume of wind raised by the Con-
federates in Congress only serves to keep
the Republican brain cool.
The Dow tax at two Numbered and fifty!
The Democrats are becoming alarmed.
This is equal to tariff robbery.
The greatest picture of misery-a man
at fire, without club. How is he to
break the windows and mirrorsP
New York has been badly showed nm
der for several days. This will not occur
again until next November.
Ben. Butler writes a letter mourning
for the hanged Anarchists. The General
is odd-he always liked to be alone.
80
No use to talk temperance in New
York during blizzard weather. Milk
costs fonr times as much as whisky.
The only thing that ever came near
paralyzing Roscoe Conkling was last
weeks blizzard. And he even got away
with that.
Judge Thurman declares he "knows
both Myers and his master, Mclean"
And he didn't seem to be proud of the
knowledge.
"Judge Thurman nails a Democratic
liew Well, the Judge is too old to begin
that kind of work. There's too much of
it.
Mr. Randall would remove the internal
revenue tax from fruit brandies. But it's
strychnine and rain-water that make the
saloonist's business a go.
One Michigan doctor had another one
arrested for trying to knock him down.
No jury will convict IF he had wanted
to kill his professional brother, it would
have been easier to prescribe.
1t is claimed that Senator Ingalls,, CALLED
at Democratic criticisms, will modify
portion of his recent speech. That's right,
Senator, make it stronger, if possible.
The Circuit Court affirmed the right to
sell beer at the Geological Garden on Sum-
day. The animals in attendance cannot
do without it,
The Copperhead papers in this District
have hit upon scheme for killing off
Republic an candidates. 1t is by support
ing them,
The agents of the Confederates are still
trying to falsify the records of the rebel
lion. Gen. Grosvenor has the miscreants
by the throat.
derstand the Standards position, we don't
wonder at it. It is because the good Lord
made him an idiot-and we never quarrel
with the Lord,
A Jackson manor rather a fellow
from the Infrmary to raise. In a few
weeks, he was himself applying for re-
lief.
Ohio leads them all. While New York
is founderlng, half-frozen, in snow
drift, Ohio is eating buckwheat cakes and
maple molasses, and listening to the
songs of birds.
Gen. Butler thinks the officers who con-
uoLuHeu GHo audICulStS Will Soiho uesy
take place in history that will show up
their wickedness. Yes, and they will
have crowns on their heads.
-"
The Gallipolis Convention is to be
Congressional Convention. Candidates
for Justice of the Peace or Road Super
visor have no interest in combination"
in that Convention.
A Washington correspondent wants
the Government to send man-of-war to
Peru, to frighten that country into be-
having itself. Send one of our war ships
over there, and the Peruvians will throw
a rock at it and sink it.