The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1888-04-19

manu1actufeQ IN tnIS country Is uSeu
in the arts. The balance in promoting
sociability.-Martha's Vineyard Her.
aid.
Georges l., H., I'LL, and ". of
England showed the effects of their
dissolute behavior in early life. They
were Rex many years before they died.
LIFE.
In Volapuk a young lady is called a
ii-pul. This name is quite graceful
enough for the object if bustles are
to remain in fashion.-NeU HaUea
NetOs.
There is a young lady III girls
school in Georgia who goes by the nick
name of Postscript" Her real name
is Adeline Moore.-BurLingtom Free
Press.
The medals owned by Bismarck
weigh over forty pounds. He has,
therefore, little reason to be jealous of
the American prize-fghters. -Ltncotn
Journal.
In the theatre: But why do you
weep? The acting is certainly not so
touching" Excuse me; l am bewail-
ing the money | paid to come in. y
Ftiegende Btaetter.
Seine people are passionately fond
of doughnuts. Others never eat any
part of doughnut except the hole.
Those people seldom have dyspepsia
SomerUttte Journal.
He that giveth to the poor lendeth to
the Lord; but the trouble with most
people in this world is that they never
make any loans except upon collateral.
baltimore american.
There is question about the vail
dity of marriage by telephone, but
we should think any level-headed
Judge would decide that it is a '.sound"
proposal. -NorriSt0Wn Herald.
City cousin-Is coasting good up
your way, Hattie? Country cousin
o, elegant! The hills are so steep that
the boys have to hold their partners on
the sleds-NelO HaUen NeaCS.
A New York boy whose father was
sent to penitentiary last week, stated
God. There is the making of an
Alderman II that boy Washington
Critic.
If Shakespeare had only known about
the Baconian cipher when he wrote
his plays there can be no doubt but
that he could have made them fit
great deal better than they do.-Lo,UeU
Citizen.
A new steel gun has been designed
for our new steel navy. As the enemy
approaches the muzzle his attention is
otol NV small c;p- sSnr1,> .
nickel in the slot and see the gun go
off, "-Burdette.
The young man who will thug him.
self, even when he is very happy,
don't deserve to live in a country where
there are 1000 toboggan slides in full
blast every day and evening. -Bur-
tingt0n Free Press.
A book agent tried to sell Pitts
burg woman volume entitled The
Art of Speech" yesterday, but she cast
such a whitening look upon him that
the wretch skunk away in shame
PtttS6urg Chronicle.
Wen it comes ter de test, it pear
like de smooth an smilin' man doan
hoP out eZ well ez de man dat amt got
SIGH er bright face. De crab-apple
| makes better cider den de sweet apple
| do.-ArkanSaW 1rdUeler.
Small boy (near open window of
restaurant smell dat soup,
Jimmy. Haih't dat fine? Jimmy
(holding his nose)-I amt smellin' no
soup terday, it nd Spite my appetite
fer de roas' chicking.-LJe.
Old lady Ito small boy who is smok-
ing)-Don't you know that smoking
isn't good for little boys? Little boy
Yesm. Dis stub puff) was maxim
my little brubber sick (puff), and |
took it from him.-NeU York Sun.
Professor-''Perpetual motion, in
the accepted sense of the term. is i'm
possible. Can you think of piece of
machinery that operates without an
impelling force?" Yes, sir" What
is it?" "A gas-meter. Lincoln
Journal.
Rochester has an organization
called 1.-The Woman's Ignorance
Club, and most of the women in town
belong to it. ANY woman who stops a
car on the wrong side of the crossing
is considered a candidate. Detroit
Free Press.
Clara" said the old man from the
head of the stairs, hasn't that
young man gone yet?' Your daugh-
ter isn't here, sir" feebly responded
the young man. "She has just stepped
into the kitchen to fill and trim lamp"
-NeI0 I0rb San.
Mr. Agile Qo Mr.. Stoutman. after
hard run for horse-car) by iove!
old boy, thought You were too lazy
to run like that. Mr.. Stoutman
Qanguidly)-"Easily explained, nv
dear boy, laZiness runs in our family"
Detroit Free Press.
1t seems strange that in the many
schemes introduced by statesmen to
get rid of the surplus no one has ever
suggested that the government start d
daily paper to fill long felt want
We presume, however, they want to
be at least six weeks, in spending the
mouey.-Burdette.
1t has been said that 1.-The receiver g
as bad as the thief. There are ex-
ceptions to this sweeping assertion.
! a railroad receiver may be 4 very
I good sort of fellow, and one willing to
/ give the earnings of the road to the di-
| rectors instead ofwasting it on stock
/ holders. -NetC Orleans Rcdyune.
/ 1t IS said that women are not natur-
! ally tnancierS. This is Just about as
{ true as the statement that all crows
| are white. Hand S. bill to the fair,
occupant of bazaar at church fair
and see how much change you get
/ back, 0, no, women are not fnanciers.
I ~ Psf~Tfa1fo, Esy.,r praea