Western appeal. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1885-18??, 1888-11-17
MISCELLANEOUS.

( &,
Epicuros declare that the block
Goldfish caught on the Northern Pacific
coast are superior to shad, and In
fnitely better than the ordinary cod.
"A German statistician figures up
that England has caused the death OF
$4,000, 900 people and has Wrought slO.-
900, 000,0 worth of destruction.
English temperance societies de-
light in such bizarre names as .s.Thc
Sons of the Phoenix, ssThe Brethren
of the Cockatrice'' and The Royal
Antid eluvian Order of Buffaloes.',
Sitting Bull says: Soon we shall
not have enough ground to stretch our
tepees and rest our limbs. We shall
have to pay taxes and be poor and
ragged like the palefaces.' .
----''The Poodle Dog restaurant, the
San Francisco Delmonlco, was yclept
by the Frenehn1an who started it s.Se
poulet dor" The Golden Hen), which
was too much of a jawbreaker for the
natives; hence the present name.
"A white woman in Columbia, S. G.,
who was charged with her colored
husband with violating the law against
lniscegenation. swore that she had
negro blood in her veins and secured
disagreement OF the jury.
What is termed a 'sstartling de-
parture in the line of horse trading'' is
reported from Fall River, where a citi-
zen who had a mare, for sale s:stated
frankly that her disposition is so sour
that she hates herself, and that he
would recommend the creature to no
body unaccustomed to horses
An Andalusian grandee was boast
ing to Prince Esterhazy, the great
Hungarian millionaire, that he had on
his various estates in Spain no less
than fifty thousand sheep. .sAh, in,
deed!' said the Prince. swell, that's
a curious coincidence, for that happens
to be just the number of my shepherds"
--Ha'per's Young People.
AT a recent parachute exhibition
in Quincy areonaut Baldwin fell 1000
feet before the parachute opened. TO
better appreciate the awful velocity OF
such d heart-5inlling drop it should be
noted that his hat, which was knocked
off as he cast loose, was left behind
500 feet, though it passed him after the
parachute finally opened.
Translated from the French: ..Tell
me" he said to the doctor, sstell me
frankly, is there any hopep' YES,
Sir; a great deal. The statistics show
that one out OF every hundred affected
with your disease RECEIVERS. y s'Well?''
'You are the hundredth have treated
for the malady, and did not cure one
of the ninety-nine others. st Louis
Magazine.
A French chef prided himself on
having an knacS ofmaking an omelette
in which could be noticed, among
other savory things, a most delicate
flavor of onions. 1t was, however, such
a mere suspicion Of a flavor that his
master begged one day to be informed
how the dish was compounded. Said
the cook: so, that is simple, monsieur:
after I've mixed the Omelette [ eat q
small piece OF onion and breathe into
the dish. Pittsburgh Dispatch.
The late Rev. William Jay, OF Bath,
and Andrew Fuller were driving
when bird flew across the
road and SO frightened the horse that he
ran away. Having got home without in
jury they were talking over the matter:
Brother" said Mr.. Fuller, '.that was
a very awkward, disagreeable bird; it
was like q jay.'' mo- was the re-
joinder, sit was fuller in the neck, tuz-
Ter in the body, and fuller all over.',
The bird in reality, they both knew,
was an owl.
He was a married man, and his
wife was the head of the household.
He had a friend who was in the same
case, only his friend was apparently
happy and comfortable. while he was
just the reverse. He had long studied
this peculiar difference between them,
and finally he mustered up courage to
go to his friend and ask him: s1What
is the way to be happy he asked,
''when you are under woman's
thumb" Don't squirm. '-Lc,cistou
Journal.
+. Farmer Cat country schooD -s.Be
you the teacher?" eyes, sir.'' $50 it
was you that thulnped the tar outen my
boy Tom last night?' 81 did punish
ar unruly scholar .Punishi Wal.
snculd say so. You stamped on him
and slugged him an ended by lSickin'
him clear across the school yard. Is
that correct?" "Pretty near ..Let
me shake hands with you. I have to
admire a man who can knock out nv
son Tom, for I'll be hanged if lacan do
it. NEBRASKA State Journa1
"A woman with a patent button
fastener, has been doing the towns in
Eastern Washington, says the Seattle
Post Iatclligencer. Walking quickly
up to a staid old gent on the street she
will dexterously clip a button from his
coat before he lets loose of the idea
that she is going to hug him, and when
he expostulates she produces her but
ton fastener and instantly replaces the
button, tight and solid. OF course he
buys a box of the fasteners. and the
lady seeks another victim to practice
her arts upon.
When you see q man carrying
book bearing on the cover the title,
.sGreat Expectatione,'' or sour Mutual
don't rush to the conclusion
that he is going toread Dickens Many
of the dainty volumes so labelled are
hollow. except that thew contain q half