The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1888-05-03

AttAS wy -.
Very much impressed, Bobby ate his
dinner in silence, until his plate needed
replenishing.
''Pa," he said, deyoutly, will you
please give me some more string beans,
for such is the kingdom Of heaven"
MIXED MOODS AND TESsEs.
Two little twins, Louisa and Julia by
name, illustrate in their queer speeches
the hard work which children have in
mastering the parts OF speech.
One day their mother missed Louisa
and as Julia had Just been out to q neigh
boris she fancied that perhaps Louisa had
been with her.
"Julia," she asked. did Louisa 80 out
with your
"No, mamma, f" said the little girl, "she
didn't been; / saw her at the window
when l was awentin'."
UNDERSTOOD HER RESOURCES.
Flake is bright-eyed little girl in lie
Droit Park, and she has bad habit OF
sucking her thumb. The other morn
ing her mother was combing her hair
and Flake, as usual, had her thumb in
her mouth.
"Flaxie, Flake, reproved her mother,
don't do that. What would you do il
that thumb should come OFF,"
suck th'other one, mamma" replied
the incorrigible, coolly, and paralyzed
her mother.
FUNNY ANSWERS.
The following are bona-fide replies to
questions Of written examination in
geography in the secondary grade OF
public school in Pennsylvania. Cues
tion-"Tell how many oceans there are
in the world, and name them" An
swer.-"There are six oceans-the Allan
tic, Pacific, Arctic, Antarctic, Indian,
and the adjacent oceans" Q.-"Give in
in your own words the difference be-
tween a cave and q mountain" A.
One is q hump in and the other is
hump out" Q.-"Tell In your own
words how river is represented on the
map, and then give the definition OF
one" A.-"When you see q black
thing on the map like lot of angle
worms all together, that's river, but
real river, OF course, is water instead OF
angle worms"
pNTIMELY 4IRTH.
The small boy, while out walking the
other day, became much interested in
the movement ola lot offeathered beau
ties, headed by a handsome rooster,
which were crossing the roadway just
ahead, They got over in safety, but one
OF the fowls had marrow escape from
being run over by passing team, and
her frantic attempts to fee from impend-
ing danger excited him considerably. |
Just as she reached the sidewalk the |
rooster crowed Justify, and Master Bert
turned to the Historian, with indgna.
ton in his tone, "UnCle, uncle" he
cried, "isn't that rooster naughty to
laugh at the poor hen so?
PROBABLY uEwAs.
"Can you change this quarterTN he
asked OF the newsboy as he bought a
paper, +,
''Then how shall We do?'
E"l'll run around the corner and get II
changed"
"You may forget to come back"
"0hI ! 'mayI Look a,here, mister,
were you ever in iail?"
"No, sir; OF course not"
"Well, neither was l, and don't that
show Pm Just as honest as you are|
He was allowed to walk off with the
quarter, and he did not forget to return.
A FAMILY TRUST,
There was great row going on inside
the house, and a policeman rushed up to
small hoy sitting quietly on the fence
in front.
whats the matter in thereF" asked
the cop.
"only pap and man."
"But they are fighting"
rOhestnlt; hRt faint bad. You see
me and pap organized trust ,agin, the
only lady, and she's legislatin' in there
now to bust it."
"What are you doing out hcre?'
"Tm stayin' away so there won't be no
quorum, while pap does the tilibustcrin!
There, hear him holler. IGuess the ma
jority is soorjn' another point" and the
boy got down and cautiously peeped
through the window, while the police,
man leaned up against the fence and
waited.