davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1888-10-18
CHARLES Il. CRAaIN,
32l ~ st. n W.,
HENRY G. STE ART. JR, l r-
liza 4 st NV. y Afus'oeS
WILLIAM K DlH MEL,
40 u ave-.
DUNCANSON BROS, Auctloueer3. oc.l-dSis
CHARLES II. CRAaIN
rNHOMAs BOWLING Aucnoneer.
DUNCANSON BROS,

fI,HOMAs BOWLING Aucuoneer
ChANCERY SALE OF VALUABLE IMPROVED
SLA ao ETMAIA BEL GsYkESdEWaSwS' t 9Is TIf
BY virtue Of q decree OF the supreme Court of sai.
:Iai ,sl PUBLIC .Hsssn r ITeps q lie
+ n. III that certain pisse ' or o psrSe
browns subdivision OF Lees hill. descrlbed
north stodert street: thence running north
win alley street - feet: thence west angles
east lin % ' the p Themes sss .ouh wh
said east ne Of said snip : point found BY drawing
point o. beg.nning until il intersects the east line Of
tue siip tnsnee east with said me revsrsed li4t
with the improvements. &C
Terms Of sale une,thru cash: residue in two equal
payments Ut one and two years, ectvely per
cent tefest aud secured b, deed prup-
At q s. Of
gurch-ser's cost Terms 70 be c0nDlied with in ten
e.: tn. 4 and
VALUAbLE PROPERTY FRONIING ON tENN-
fSSkiM AND TwESfY,fiiiTa sTKEEfs. AZ Il
o$o MSsSSH TIE E%rSErisEcoFD PAY ", or
~
building This property: By reason Of its location.
Possesses advantages those IN search Of Investment
properly struck o. All eonyeysncinE Il
cost Title ndisputable. Abstract Of Mr. ". K WOOD
ward will be SHOWN ny day OF sale.
A. L l. KEESE. Atty. 416 9Th St NV.
WEEKS CO., AuotA ocl6-dts
VlHREE-sTORY BACK DWELLING AND sTORE.
Il No 1ll7 .vENTh STkEEl NORTH " - \.
TO CLOSE TIE ESlAT OF NARY @. SCHULTZ
On MONDAY AFTERNOON. OCTOBtR TWENTY
sSs :: FIVE O'CLOCK we viii sell in front Of
" PART LOT s. SQUARE 44s.
fronting 21 feet 7th street. with depth OF ll6
feet to wide alley. improved BY three-story brick
dwelling aud store No. 1l17 18th street, between J.
and streets northwest.
TERMS une-thiru cash, balance in equal nstaluepts
from day Of sale payable i-annualy, and be 90
cSfio oS ps nnrchr depost of @ Sa,n at
Quired ss time OF sale. Conyeysacinx, re-. at pur-
other right we'd to resell at the risk aud
of the defzultng purchaser. after nve days. Iublic
notice of such resale In newspaper published
Washington, ID. q. DUNCANSON BROs
Ocl6-d Aucuoneers.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1888-10-18

BOLD BOSTON NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. and 8 O'Clock
yesterday AFTERNOON w. N. Maynard, Jeweiry
broker, OF 10 Brattle Square, Boston, locked up MIS-
OF httewash, brush ana step-ladder, and white
washed the outstds OF the windows 70 passers-by
could not look U. The thieves ct once gained
front door BY means OF the ladder, and secured
seven trays OF gold and silver watches and Ola
mondA rough estimate Of the property stolen
places the value at q 100 o. D, 500
The London Baptist Association has unanimous
" agreed 70 oppose the sectastan psopoeals Of the
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1888-10-18
brutal Fight over a Woman.

TIoNKsrA, Pa, Oct. 1s.-A most brutal night be-
tween Two bury lum0ermen took place near here
yesterday. They fought, rough and tumble, for
over an hour, and when parted one OF the pugilsts
was minus both OF his ears, having been chewed
OF by his antagonist. The Tight was over young
woman, Whose hand ana heart they both claim.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1888-10-18
nUNCANsoN BROS. Auctioussrs.
fRusTEE's SALE OF VALUABLE IMPROVED AND
UNIMPROvED ZEAL ESTATE, MAX IHk
CORNER OF SIXTkENTH AND SHEETS

BY virtue Of deed of trust recorded in Lber 900.
q folio 1882 OF OF the Land Records OF the
District OF Columbia will sell st public auction N
front 81 the premises. IN THURSDAY, OCIoblh
TMkSTI.fIF1H.1 1885, beginning at FOUR LOCK
p Al. the following described real estate. 1sins in
Q11l In the city Of wAshinetor District OF Columbia
70 Wit: The west i've t5 fret and I'D inch front By
the depth thereof. lot numbere twenty flour l24l
OF Jones Adams and ouyafs subdivision of part "
SAID squzrs and lots numbered so 81. g. 50. 81 Sd
80 50, 90 81 81. 93 -. %. 90 % aud 9S IN n A.
baochs subdivision OF pert Of sid square the nrsl
seven OF said lots lie vacant and fronting Swami
street aud the last ten 6eing improved by ten thre
story BRICK dwelling housee thereon. numbered 1904
and 1872 18th street
Terms: one-shird cash and residue in equal INSTALL
nents 81 one and two from day Of sale. with In
terest at sia per cent per annum. p.ysb sentannu
AL AID secured on the PROPERTY or all cash IL desired
deposit Of 500 Will be required at time Of sale
each lot improved and deposit OF 500 each LOT
unimprcyed- AL convey ing At the cost Of pur-
chaser. IL sale not coinplied with In twenty days.
right reserved to resell At risk and Of defsults
purchaser purchasers after ve days public
OF such resaie IN some spzper pub shed In ash
tn2ton, ID e. FRANCIS q SMITH. Trustee
ocl3-lot 1222 st. NV.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1888-10-18

ENGLAND DID Non ORDER CANADA TO RE suxxr ,.
Inc government organ at Toronto the EasDf,r
prints a dlspatch from Ottawa. wlieh saysr a
member OF the government to-day said their WAS
not word OF truth In the report that immedia
after President Cieyeland's retaliation proposais
Lord Salisbury eaoled the Canadian coyersmen1
10 remain sl0ht on the matter until Instructions
were sent from Great Britain, or, In other words
that England had assumed control OF the dspufe
NO action viii be taken by the Canadian govern
ment until IL - arst seen what course the United
states Will follow In the matter. No remon-
stranees or complaints OF any kind have been
maoe ny the Canadian government to her maj
estys government on the subject OF retaliataons'
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1888-10-18
oc17-d&d
WALTER b WILLIAMS Co. Auctioneer.

We Viii sell by auction in front of salesroom, on
TAUkSDAf. OCTOBER EI0HTELN, at -FOUR
VCLOCk r Al. beautiful collection Of Plants, from
the well known Nurseries OF John saul suits BILE for
a4 er osiSr,son during winter consisting q Palms
folaged and ornamental plants.
ocl6-St WALTEk b. WILLIAMS co, Aucts.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1888-10-18
VNAoAAs BOWLING. Auctioneer.
CHANCERY SALE OF VALUABLE UNINpRoyrD
xn0PkkTY ON HE NOkTH SIDE OF o
$500: nETWEEN 9TH AND 9Th STREETH

SSTkSEEE BETWEEN 9TH AND 9Th STREETS
BY virtue q decree ps.ssd in cause No. ioe7s.
Rubiac suction on TUESDAY OCTOBER TWENTY.
1a41D, lSSS. q RALF-PAsT FCUk OCLOtK IN,
q tee subd1yision Of lots and = In square bend
N ths City d Washington and District u Column
Terms q ale: one-third cash and residue I'm two
SQusA !0osaAmeutD at and two with interest
iom the Day Of SALE Al cash adoption Of the pur-
cnaeer yyOQ dopo1is ct mo q sAle Conyeyanc1ng q
coosos puIcnnDoe. IRWIN n LlNTOE,
ocH-o8o TxunsoA
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1888-10-18
HE'D by His Partner.
SINGULAR FEATURES on A BUSINESS SUSPENSION IN

BOSTON,
The failure OF George A. Denham & Co, boots
and shoes. No. rs Federal street, Boston, turns
out 70 be something more than failure. Mr.. Den
ham disappeared last Thursday with the books
which are declared 10 be the most important and
Ieit behind no casa or bank deposits. IL appears
that a year ago tie frm OF Denham Rowland
was dissolved. ME. HOwiand retiring, and that
Dennam took George H. Burt a special partner.
The books OF the old ,nrm showed a surplus OF
$1,000 or SeoOOo, and Dir. Burt put In $4,000
more In cash Denham called on Burt for more
money IN March last, and got II Later he made
tuIlner requisitions. which were In like manner
nonoreo The last demand came a week ago when
MI Burt called In an expert and his partner dis
appeare1. An attachment was then put ON the
ssoch- Inc oooks OF the old firn are missing and
there Is nothing In bank 10 the nrm's credit. the
expert believes that instead OF a surplus the firm
y. Dennim Rowland had a deficIt OF some
S4O.UO. and that Denham took about a 600 lust
pIios ~ hs departure The oookkeeper says that
the DOCKS OF the nrm were In the safe the early
part o. last week, but they are NOT there now Mr.
burt THINKS tnal he has been swindled bur viii
get whatever there Is =,
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1888-10-18

vDlEDMONT AIR LINE
p M@f. n en nsSp seE,s%esr sou Isss
oordonsv1lle .ni s,..,.
between Aexandrla aud Ly chburs Roanoke Rr1s,.,i
leans Psllmsp sleensr Ns oh,ssmefy and New Or
ll:24 A M.-fsst Mail DAILY Tor Narrenton Sbs,.
ictt~ vllirs Sordonsyllle statns Ches fhlo R,,,,.
hynsn pun, hook, Mount pAnvillc. and stsTo : os.
Chsriotte, Columbia. Augusta. Atant. HiI1nin-.
ham. MontSomery New nrieans rerss and C.lis,,-n,.
.insn sb-eirr New York 90 MONTGOMERY IN consec-
ton With pullman slsepers MONTGOMERY 20 New Dr.
lens and Mann boudoir sleep~rs for Birminshsn
Nlckrourf and hrevepOrt Pullman Sleeper D.n,'is
20 20 unp1A and Angusa SOLID trans Ms.hinston 20
sS nas DOCS mol connect Tor c. o. points
30 p. M-Dsily. except Sunday for Msp..-..
~ r. h--Messrn Express Daily for warren,ou
0ordonsyille. Chsrottesyi le Iouisyfil~ Csnr,anst
Pullman seepers and sofa Trains Washinstog 20
pnss h a,,e i95 Lyncheurr Bristol. ChAttsnoga
Tt.roush Pu Imam slssper Washington 70 Msmphis
Ii:oo =. M-southerp r,,r... n.u, o., -
burg. Dsnvie, Raleigh A.hsville Clsriott.. sSln,.
bia. Alsen. August. Atlanta MONTGOMERY Me- re-
leans Tens and California Pullman yestibale sie-u@r
M.snLsson ~ New orieAns Via Atlanta and Mont
Ca. without change.
Trains Warrington and Ohio division ,..v, wash.
MA bsis so s2rxe M a Daiy ssseR SUNDAY, and
NJ Return ny leave Round I'LL . .O5 A NJ Dai y aud
LA " pa na etSsy, SUNDAY arriving Washington
Through trains fIom the South via chsrlo,,. nan
Vile AMI Lynchhurg arrive In Mashington 90 A III
and 30 NJ via East Teni essee BriS tol spd Ixnc6
burg 81 Ills AN. and y; 40 Pm. via Obe-speaEs
and Ohio route and Charlottesville al . 40 - nj
StrA~burx Local At 947 AN
IlcksA Stepping car Reservation and information
fnrnisnsd and b.evas. checked at ocs. 800 Penn
MIA kaalrosd 9th and b SITS. JAS. l. TAYLoR
oci General Passenger Asent
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1888-10-18
AUCTION SALES.
EVrURE nAHA
nuNcANsoN BRos- Auctao.sera
fRgsTErs SALE OF gNn1PRovEp PRorERIy
o. HAsI cAPiTyk sIkkrI. hsIMxkN !ygE-

fEgsrEEs SALE OF -QNnzpRoyzp PROPERTY
By urta. q aesd Of trust duly rscorusd IN Isbsr
the ss q ooa % q ir :: Ha he
Ifl isfIt psT Or q, ScfSsGS s tsss: I Siyf
situate and sne in he city o. Washinyton Di.tr O
Columbia 10 vita AL that csrssin piece parce Of
beng ict Iirsssn i3l. In square one thoes.Sd and
ffty eight O05Sl commsnctng Of . point one hun
dr.d and eight fesf est last oaptol street from
south from said point ONE zen ies thence
inch; thence ssst forty-two fsst; thence north one
hundred and twenty eignt fses ana one ,nen 70 hsei
Capitol street the ront Of beginning scoordns 20
The plan aud plat thereof recorded n the Plat
the surveyors once In said District
Terms: One-hAif cash. balance In one war note TO
bear per cent interest and TO Dc secured BY deed Of
trust on property soo. all csah at option Of pur
chaser A deposit Of 500 ROUND q sale. CONWAY:
alcins &C. At iurchAsers cost Tsrms 70 Be oomplied
with In days, otherviss the Trusse reserve the
right resell the properly Of the rsk and cost OF the
defsultns purchaser after ave days public notice of
such resale IN some Newspaper pubishsd IN "sshins
ocia-dads THOMAS q. BRADLEY. Trustee
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1888-10-18
RAILROADS
RAIrInokE a ONO RAILROAD
- Schedule IN 81 ect 49, 81 ,ss,

BMrrrsosss,ss a ENG RAILnoAp.
Leave ws.Asnxto. , n "a &c, Apr. -. lass
sssSas - q . ~ o. ss~ 'srsv
press daily 10 .ns Sats... ,ss.is1lsS limited en-
fer oaneann.n and a. Loaa sIpr,.. Al, 90
rSr ta,sse1r. md Cleveland v.-sshul.i isu,.a q.
For I@x,u.rSo e ,nd ~ IN. snd s.Pre-- Is pn
M rG5 d as. .ns p, Nsssrs and wi,S1ssoa 90
For iSs sTn nm r. a,.lS ssrrrss
"a fss sias'rs 'od iH'srrasdiss Point. u.so...
e s.is%or., s. GO SEQ. ,so,,~,.Au
.rs,ss s:so. sS 81 "a s os y '.s
iiS gSs. $50 $50 90 s.s sse "a $50 Or
R n S SnP ssss.S 20 "a 50 ~. n 10 and 30
S.Psa: 90 IN u oS. ssS 90 a Is'' sun sa
, aor Way o s,.,Ss. between wsshia.-ou and s.,,,-
n% On ~ 49, 81 20 am, " ~. DO "a IS
Re, stat ons on the aetropOii,.S hssscs 20 % 20
sss fs 30 ,. snl f.sss,g1 stations only 10 io
so .s,sS sna ~ =. ,sfa sais.e pOln, 20 90
a., ao g. boydrs and intsrmeaisis STALLION. ,7oo
Church trains leave Washington nm s,,,.....,--.
Ia m stoppsns II al stations 90 MslropSli,.a
For frsderck flo: 10 an. $500. a AS. .. 40 :,
m. sundays 1;l5 pm '~''V "
Trains arrive from "a csso a.;l, - 81 ~ ~ IA
IN from Cincinnati and ST Louis daily . 20 = no
nn ~, loo p.m.' from f1ttsbus daily ~ sn 5 IL
FROM fhiladelphiA, Chester and wtlnfn.rt,n :, an
~ and % m daily aud tho; SIS a M ~
Bsstimors. 10 o. m daily. and ~ IS am sana.S.
Trains leave B.ltmor~ for ws.hurtop- ., %
su % BOO s:O5. 10 -Iun ATE tr.ine N I'd
s4o,nangte srsin) am ~ ). 90 500 10 s.eo
900. ~. =. 10 80 and N a m ON s1pi.s ~ N
100. %. 1880 an. l:l5 90 10 4 30 y g. g.
Ia. $50 and II 90 pm Nv S'os' v ~
fkxeeIt sunday. ID as ssundays onix
Baggage called Tor and checked nd hc,'r' -. -,
Pa ave. VIZ anu ASoi
v" ~ ~ cLf MI rs cHAs. q. SOUL.
y ~ go .e@ns-oI. Gen Pass. Agent.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1888-10-18

The Kansas City star serves up Belva c. Lock
woods claim TO the SURFACES OF the American peo-
pie as follows:
Belva Lockwood Is a lawyer
The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-11-10

Abe, you are getting DID," said the
city editor, seeming to look at him
anew.
"That's right"
81 was boy, holding copy on this
paper, when you were the editor"
eyes, believe you were."
"Time is flying, Abe"
eyes, but my time has no swifter
wings than yours. In fact, not so
swift, for my time is pretty well
spent, while yours is just rising"
"You are something of philoso-
pher yet, Abe"
"Yes, am on that slippery middle
ground that lies between the fool and
the philosopher. If l were more Of q
philosopher 1 might write for the
speculative magazines If more of the
fool, I would doubtless write verses.
Say you can't give me any work."
"No, / haven't anything you can
do.o
"Take q special article, wouldn't
your"
eyes, If there should be anything in
it."
"Let me have that table over there,
and Tll write you one"
"Go ahead"
He sat down to the table. Every
reporter who passed In or out had a
word to say to Abe, and sometimes
their words, although without such
intention, were not pleasant.
"Helloa, Abe, writing the Declare
ton Of independence"
"Let him alone, he's giving the
president tip on his future message.
"Bet he couldn't write the copy for
meal ticket"
"Could he write admit one2"
"He is asleep" said the city editor.
"Abe, this is no lodging house. Abe,
come, stir about, now. He hasn't
written a line. Yes, he's started of
with Montgomery:
long to lay this painful head
And aching heart beneath the soil,
To slumber in that dreamless bed
From all my TOLL
"Come, Abe, the chickens are crow
ing for day. Abraham, list to the
voice that woos you. Come Couch
ing his shoulder), get up, now. We
my God, boys, he's dead pope p.
Read.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-11-10
VOL: Ii. NO. Is.
A NOVEMBER MORNING.
BIZ CHARLES EUGENE BANKS.

The laggard morning tints a ragged east,
The sun a red and rayless disk appears;
While bafied vapors, fresh from pois'nous
feast.
The uplands moisten with revengeful tears.
A. watchful crow swings cawing from the
wood,
A.lonely maliard futters from the brake,
And nature, clad IN sombre cloak and hood,
stirs languidly as she were 10th to wake.
The leaves that lately shone so fresh and
bright,
Now dry and withered to the ground are
cast,
Where ever round and round in restless flight,
They're driven by the chill November blast.
The sumac in the naked hedgerow bleeds,
Impatiently the bluejay calls his mate.
A crane stalks ghostly thro' the swaying
reeds,
And all about is drear and desolate.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-11-10
A DISCUSSION.

A man, while riding along q road in
Kansas, hearing terrific noise in q
house near the road side, stopped and
thus addressed an old fellow who stood
leaning against tree;
"What means all that racket mp
yonder?"
"Oh, it's only a sort Of family affair. !"
"a family affair."" the traveller ex-
claimed.
ayes, my sons, Bill, Dick, Bob am
Ned, are windin' up the discussion
they had this mornin'. They fall into
them sort o. things once In while"
"Don't they hurt each other?"
"Wall, yes, sometimes. Bill had his
arm broke some time ago an Ned had
one o. his ears chawed of last fall.
Yes, it's sorter dangerous"
"Why do you let them fight7"
"Why did Jonah let the gourd vine
wither?"
"Couldn't help himself"
@Wall then / KANT help myself.
When they begin to fight me an my
wife jest walk away an wait till they
get through"
Where IL your wife?"
"Standin' under Q tree over ON the
other side Of the road"
.Why don't you stay together?"
@Cause If we did we'd be in fight
in about ten minutes. Thar, the fights
over. Won't you 60 mp an take din
ner with us?n
mo, thank you"
"Better come. You'll find the boys
nice an polite"
The report of q gun was heard.
ssThar r. exclaimed the old man,
11thiDgs have tuck lively turn. Don't
b'Peve Pm quite fur enough from the
house. must move further. 30
long"
The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-11-10
FOUND 1T.

Chicago City Editor Ito reportsr)--
~ zee that In writing up suicide you
refer TO. 'the cold and rcmorscless
river.'n
Reporter-"Yes, l always like TO
throw feeling into what I write.n
City Editor-"That's capital, but
did you ever zee O river stricken with
remorse?"
Reporter-T don't know that /
have"
City Editor-.weii, then, 20 and
fnd one, and, by the way, don't come
back until you do fnd one"
1.-THE reporter goes away. Two days
later he returns.
City Editor =" Helloa, got back,
have your"
Reporter-"Yes."
City Editor-"Well, did you find .
remorseful river?"
Reporter-T did"
City EditoF-"What river is it?"
Reporter-"The Mississippi"
City Editor-"Why remorseful7"
Reporter-"Because years ago, 1t
decided TO run by st. Louis.n
City Editor (springing TO his feet)
Young man, take my sat. re-
sign"
The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-11-10
ExCUSABLE.

Country school teacher In Georgia
Ito boy)-"Where Is your spelling
book"
Boy-"Ain't got none"
Teacher-"You had one yesterday.
What did you do with it?"
Boy-"Tore II up"
Teacher-"Whatl You good for
nothing young rascal, shall take q
switch and wear yoc cut, You ought
to be ashamed Of yourself Your
father is doing everything he can to
give you an education and hero you
are tearing up your books. Oh, Pm
going to whip you for II and your
turning up TO cry won't help II any.
What did you tear that book up forI'
Boy-"To build o Are with"
Teacher-"To build o Are with
You young rascal! Why did you
want 10 build q FIRE, @yf"
Boy-"Wanted to smoke q rabbit
outen boiler tree"
Teacher-"Did you get him7"
Boy-"Yes, SIR"
Teacher-"Good; but why didn't
you let me know it2 The next time
you tree q rabbit want to know H."
Boy-"Air You going TO whup mc7"
Teacher-"What, for smoking out a
rabbit My dear young friend, hope
you do not take me for fool"
The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-11-10

I'll let the thing go. rs got you by
de law, but I'll make dis trade wild
you"
$50 ON, old man, or III have you
put out"
"Now yere, rs nightly 'sposed ter
do whut's right. You jes gin me
twenty a. cents err munt now pm dar
won't be no mo- trouble bout dis
yere,"
"Here, show this old man out"
"Oh, / know de way out en- well e.
l knowed de way In. Tell you whut
I'll do. Gin me ten cents err munt."
He was hustled out of the room.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-11-10


An old fellow who had come down
from the hills TO attend o religious
meeting ut Nashville, sat In the par
lor Of the principal hotel, talking 70
some one. lie took chew Of tobacco,
and the proprietor OF the hotel, In
yisw Of the fset that he had just pot
down . eresm-coicred carpet, moved .
spittoon close TO the old fellow.
"Don't put yo'self to no trouble ON
my account"
mo trouble Ut Ill, Mr.. spiiiers.S
Mr.. 6pillsrs continued to chew, but
proud Of his ability to spit straight,
secrnsd the near spittoon and, squint-
Ing - though taking sight, be fred 1t
O spittoon half wsy scross the room
and missed II about three inches.
@walI, pil b disgsd IT / diin't mias
her clear" he exclaimed. sHump,
! don't zee whut's the matter with my
mouth. Ef ole Brother 9tubbIns was
here he'd laugh 1t me-" The proprie-
TOR OF the hotel did not laugh.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-11-10

Father Ito con who hiss just come
home from schooD-"Whst are you
studying now77
Son-"Theology.S
Father-"What, you don't Intend
TO become . preacher, do your"
6on--"Eo, sir"
Father-"Then why do you spend
20 much time on theoiogy7"
Son--HSo that In my old age can
write jokes for the magazine"
The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-11-10
GOOD CHANCES.

The following letter, written by
Colonel John II. tittlehorn, OF Ken
lucky, shows that even In the blue
grass state II 10 aometimcs necessary TO
ward of campaign ISLANDERS;
any DEAN RrfE: am getting
along with my canvass TOR sheriff ~
well ~ could DO expected aud Unless
some now scheme Ia sprung on mo
will undoubtedly be elected. Nat
Slater. ~ big scoundrel NJ ever lived.
started tho report the other day that
am . prohibitlonist, and, sir, the
Islander took Immediate hold. got
drunk and went out on tho street, and
that trihlng scoundrel declared that
Wa merely putting on. I tell you,
Rute, that this world 10 growing
worae every day. A committee OF
gentlemen called on mo and wc ell got
full, 90, reckon, they bclieve In my
uprlghtness Of principle, buF 70 make
myself more secure bought the old
log still-houae on the lIIghtower
place. ! have heard IL whispered that
lack Buck, a trifiing scoundrel who
has sold himself 10 the enemy, has cir
culated tho report that I only rented
tho still-house for effect and that I
will turn II loose after the campaign.
Now what business has he got 10 med.
die with my affairs? RUFF, there's no
use talking. Mon arc getting worse
and worsc every year. II I. true that
! have not paid for the still-house yet
but expect 10 II am elected. Old
Bud Bender, the IIardshell preacher,
10 with me. All, there's q man for
you, RUFF. He can drink pint of
apple brandy, stand In a half. buahei
and shoulder two bushels Of wheat.
They are not turning out such mon
these days, Rnfe. Last sunday he
preached o sermon down 1T Rocky
Cove and came out square, toed for
me. lie told them that the man vino
said was q prohibitionist was 9 liar
and tina: he could whip him. and he
could do 1t, too. That night we held
prayer. meeting over at Sim Coving-
toms. II was rainy night, and there
were not many women folks present,
but we men had good time. Sim he
brought out some licker that has been
10 the family for some time, and II
wasn't long until we had forgot all
about the women folks and settled
down 70 real enjoyment. After We
had prayed about enough Sim and
Luke Belsher got into q political ar
gurnsnt. Sim hit Luke with quart
bottle and then the campaign was de-
ciAred formally opened, and before the
polls closed both gentlemen were
pretty badly hurt A piece Of flying
glass struck old Miss Patsy Boyle, and
she, active old soul, gathered up fat
iron and krocked Sim pretty tolsrAblc
cool. Well, ~ I said before, unless
they spring a new trick I'll be
elected"