The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1888-12-21
SUFFERING STORIES.
How Mr. Smith Suffered Into Matrimony
Perhaps Against Ills VIII.


Perhaps Against Ills Will
An untind story-even IL true-was
told me while was in England OF
young lady who married a suffering
man.
The young man was undoubtedly a
sufferer Of the most positive order,
for | have heard him go through
paroXysms to get out simple Good
morning" The lady whom he subse-
quently married was OF an eminently
practical turn of mind. No maiden
modesty or bashfulness cloyed her
methods. She spoke TO the point and
never left n thought uneXpressed il she
deemed it pertinent. After he had
called upon her some three or four
times she decided that it was about
tirSe for her to know his intentions.
SO the next time he called. after they
had seated themselves as usual on the
sofa, she said quietly but firmly: "Mr.
Smith, am very much fattered by the
interest you have taken in me, and the
flowers you have given me are very
pretty, but feel that | should not be
doing my duty if delayed any longer
asking you what your intentions are;
whittier do these intentions and pres
eLts lead?'
Young Mr.. Smith rose TO his feet and
n blush rose TO his checks. He eessayed
TO speak. For moment his lips and
tongue seemed paralyzed. Then he
managed to get out "M-M-M-M-My
dd-d-d-d'-but he could get no farther.
The d might have stood for any num-
Der of words, but Miss Smith, justifa-
bly,, perhaps, interpreted it to stand
for darling and the youths acute en-
barrassment to modest confusion in
making formal proposal.
Any way, she took Mr.. Smith by the
hand, and looking into his eyes, ex-
claimed: "Mr. Smith. | appreciate
your embarrassment, but understand
what you wish TO say. You may speak
to papa, and If he approves. so do l."
They were married n few months
later. but Mr.. Smith has never ex-
planned satisfactorily to his friends
whether he suffered into matrimony
of his own free will or against it.
Another amusing consequence OF an
impeded speech comes to my mind.
A lady who could not say twenty
words without suffering to a greater
or less extent called upon a family that
had moved into her neighborhood n
short time before. As luck would
have it, in this family was a young
lady who suffered. and she it was who
opened the door when the afore-men-
toned lady called. For convenience
let us call the caller Mrs. Y. and the
girl who is standing inside the door
is Miss Y.
Mrs. y. was little nervous, and
thence her infrmity gathered strength.
Said she: "Is MINIMUM" and so on.
Miss Y gazed at Mrs. X. in aston
isument and as the MS" piled up and
nothin< Ineligible followed them. she
asked; "Wer- ver-wcr-wer- what
d-d-do YOU want?"
Now it waS Mrs. KS turn 10 be as
tonishcd, and, worse still. angry. She
thought Miss Y. was initiating her, and
she said tolerably clearly: You are the
m-m-m-m-most im-im-impud girl |
ever saw"
Plzzlcd Miss Y. grew mad at this.
and slammed the door in Mrs. KS
face, and reported ia her mother that
she had just couversed with a maniac.
A great disturbance shook the neigh
borhood in consequence OF this inter
view. but mutual friends stepped in
and explained TO the ladies the true
origin Of the difficulty. and they grew
70 be fast friends aiterward. -Iftts.
l,.r,h Dssr.,g.L