The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1888-07-07
CARL DUNDER.
Looks Like Some Jobs On Him, Accord
ing to What He Tells the Police.


From the Detroit Free Press.
Oh! yesl You are the man who was
never coming down here againI' exclaimed
Sergt Bendall yesterday, as Carl Dunder
entered the station.
"Vhell, dunno. Maybe like to shpeak
NIT you leedlen
Speak on | suppose you have been
swindled again.
Sergeant, maybe you know how she vhas
himself some day. Maybe you go oafer by
Shermany, und When you vhas dere you find
dot nottngs Yhas two time alike"
We'll, 90 ahead"
"Do some letter carriers go aboudt nit
oudt uniforms on"
"YeS-new ones.n
'Vhell, man comes in my place the
odder morning und gifts me letter. Dot
vhas all right. She WAS letter from some
tailor dot makes clothes VERY sheap. Dot
same man comes in der next morning nit
some odder letter. He says she vhas regis
tered, u1d hat to sign my name und pay
feefty cents"
II see"
"Vhell, pay, und it vhas a circular dot
if | want some orange groves for $40 shall
80 to Florida. Was dot all rghtW
~ was put up job to swindle you out
But if get dot orange grove for $40
WINS ahead
"Humpa! Anything else happenp'
'Vhas Cleveland to be president again.
"IIe has been renominated."
Does he make a new post Office for De-
trot!"
I'VE are to have one some time during
the next century. Do you want to be post
masterp
mo, but man comes in my place der
odder day und says WAS Carl Dunder?
vhaS. Half / some some son named Snakes
[ hat. Please call him in. | calls Shake in,
und dot man measures him nit a tape-line.
looks at his tongue, feels of his neck, und
says:
"'She vhas all right, Mr.. Dunder, you
vhas a Cleveland man hearw
"'I vhas'
"'Und you like to hat Shake be some
boss in der building of dot postoffice und
earn 81 a day q
"I snail
HE takes his name, age, weight, und der
color of his hair. und we hat some beer und
cigars. Some odder fellers come in, und
treat 'em also. Some more fellers come in,
und Shake says he likes to make it all right.
Dot crowd almost clean me oudt All der
afternoons und evenings somepody comes in
und says:
"Hello! old man, but dot vhas all right !
Shake vhas good poy, ind dot shob be-
longs to him. Here vhas to your good
luckn
Has Jake got it yet %
"Nhell, he goes oafer by dot big hole in
der ground, und stays aroundt, but nopody
shpeaks to him.
Cant you and Jake get into that hole
and bury yourSelvesM
why vhas dotH
"Ho save you from the next swindler.
It's a wonder you haven't lost your teeth -
Does dot mean l vhas some greenhornS9 ~
Does it! | should smile"
81 like to shmile, too, but | can't. When
l tells Shake he Will feel awful badt. like
you to look at dis gas bill leedle."
Certainly. This bill shows that you
burned $5 worth of gas in May"
But ! can't mako her oudt. Aboudt der
middle of May Young man comes in my
place init a lantern in his hand, und goes
nv dot gas meter. When he comes AWAY
he says: Mr.. Dunder, vhas leedle hard
oop to-day, und if you can let me hat 81 l
gil you all der gas you can barn dis
month"
And you let him have itr'
''Vheh, l like to oblige somepody, don't
~
But you have discovered that he was
fraudw
Yes, but can I help dot9 Can call
eaferypody liar und tiefs Can | slump
on eafery mans collar"
But you must have better judgment"
"Shudgmcnt! When an expressman comes
und pellet he vhaS swindle und knock
him oafer dot is shudgment. When he
comes again und schmiles on him he leafs
me biz shtone und collects 81 Dot vhas
more shudgmont! One time soms one
comes ny mo to collect money for der
orphans, und you laugh ind say | vhas
grcenhorns. Der next day somepOdy comes
py me to collect money for der poor und |
knock his head Off und you like to send me
to shall! Shudgmeutl like TO sec some
pcdy hat some shudgment in dis country.
Sergeant, good day! l hat some shudgment
dot advertise my place for sale shear, and
some more shudgment dot | go pack to
Shermany right aVhay!n