Reporter and farmer. [volume] (Webster, Day County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1946, 1888-07-05


for sale or trade-will sell for cash or on
time. Call at the Sheriff's office in the
court house. 7. McKEsNETr.
Elder Chaffee, of the Ameri-
can Bible Union, will give series
of Biblical and temperance lectures
in Webster, commencing to-day.
The meetings viii be in tent by
Masonic Hall. All are cordiallym.
yited.
Young, the poet sings, ooh,
how pretentious is prosperity, how
comet like it shines;" and some one
else says there is an instinct in the
heart Of man that makes them fe&r
a cloudless prosperity. Pshawl
Bring on your prosperity! Who's
afraid?
I'll was never buried alive" said
an old clerk, recomting his expert
ence, "but | once worked q week in
a store that did not advertise. =
When | came ont my head was al
most as white as you see it--solitary
confinement did it. Elk.
The question is what portion
of the ear is called the Globe" We
think it is that portion which your
parent used to firmly grasp wnen he
led you gently out to gaze upon the
handsome proportions OF the neg
lected wood pile.
When you doubt a mans YER
acity 1t lie very vulgar to say 'syou
liep You should say, Sir, you en-
ter upon a disquisition with com
mendable degree of erookedness, a
plastic disregard of fact entirely
consistent with your character.
That'll fetch him.
ANY man who has mind of
his own can quit any habit he wants
to. If he has no mind, no self-re-
spect, no frmness aud determine
tion, and does not care for the good
opinion Of those around him, o.
course he can't be expected to as.
sert any manhood in the premises,
Give a boy a market basket full
of groceries to carry home and he
will swing it across his spine, bend
half way to the ground and groan
with agony; but give him a load OF
base ball bats and he will skip along
as merrily as potatoe bug in ten
acre lot.
"A lady trading with one of our
merchants the other day, was pre-
sented with some silver change, as
the same time informing her it wat
good democratic money. She took
it and jingled it for a while and
then agreed that she thought it
was. ''Just listen" said she, one
would suppose from the sound that
| had fifty dollars, when its only
fifty cents. That's the way with
the democratic party soanG AMI
tinsel and glitter, with but very
little solid worth to recommend it.
The merchant scratched hia Lead
and smiled,
w. II. Jones, one of the live
farmers of Egeland township, was
in town Saturday accompanied by
thirteen teams to harl lumber out
to his place. Mr.. Jones is going to
construct a barn 36x60, arch roof,
on his place, and this big train was
taking out the lumber for that pur-
pose. 1t was a big thing to see
this long line OF teams stretching
away in the distance, over the very
same ground where the Indian trail
ed his tepee fastened to poles, ono
end on either side Of poney, the
other on the ground, less than ten
years ago. Truly, the Star Of En-
pire, in its westward way, has made
many wonderful changes by the inz
PRODUCTION Of ciyilizing influences
in the "Great American Desert"
IA lad entered one OF our drug
stores the other day, bottle in hand
and asked for ten cents worth Of
s'armakymony.' The druggist ask
ed him to repeat the word and then
inquired whether lie meant arnioa
or ammonia. Dunno" replied the
boy. .What is it for?" asked the
man of pills. "Can't tell" said
the boy starting slowly out, When
near the door bright idea Huns
mated his mind, when he turned
and asked the druggist, IN your
wife hit you on the head with
chair leg, which of them medicines
would you git to take the swellin'
outs" "Arnica, "Then fill her in
ten GEMS with" replied the boy
and he gazed loyelngly at a big glass
marble in show case while the ar
Mica bottle was being filled.