Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1888-01-07
4 WORD EoR THE GIRLS

Lady Bellairs' "Gossips With Girls and
Maidens contains some very interesting
essays, and quite extraordinary amount
of useful information on all matters con-
nected with the mental and physical
training of women. 1t is very difficult to
give good advice without being irritating,
and almost impossible to be at once didactic
and delightful but Lady Bellairs manages
very cleverly to steer middle course be-
tween the Charybdis of dullness and the
Scylla OF tiippancy. There is pleasing
intimate about her style, and almost every
thing that she says has both good sense
and good humor to recommend it. Nor
does she confine herself to those broad gen.
ordinations on morals, which are easy to
make, so difficult to apply. Indeed, she
seems to have wholesome contempt for
the cheap severity of abstract ethics, en-
tiers into the most minute details for the
guidance of conduct, and draws out
elaborate lists of what girls should avoid
and what they should cultivate Here are
some specimens of What to Avoid :"
"a loud, weak, affected, whining, harsh
or shrill tone of voice.
Extravagances in conversation-such
phrases as lawfully this Beastly that,
Loads of time Don't you know hate
for dislike etc.
Sudden explanations of annoyance,
surprise or joy-often dangerously APP
preaching to female swearing - as
Botherp Graciousr How iollyP
=" Yawning when listening to any one.
Talking on family matters, even to
your bosom friends
Attempting any vocal or instrumental
piece of music that you can not execute
with ease.
Crossing your letters.
Making short, sharp nod with the
head, intended to do duty as bow.
All nonsense in the shape of belief in
dreams, omens, presentiments, ghosts
spiritualism, palmistry, ETC.
Entertaining wild flights of the imagi
nation, or empty idealistic aspirations"
am afraid that / have a good deal o.
sympathy with what are called "empty
idealistic aspirations :" ard wild flights
of the imagination" are so extremely rare
in the nineteenth century, that they seen
to me deserving rather of praise than o.
| censure. The exclamation, Bother" also
though certainly lacking in beauty, might
| think, be permitted under circumstance
of extreme aggravation, such as, for in
stance, the rejection of manuscript by
the editor of Il magazine; but in all other
| respects the list seems to be quite ex
cellent. As for "What to Cultivate
nothing could be be better than the fol
| Lowing:
"An unaffected, low, distinct. silver
toned voice.
WI Nf, al
and seeming pleased with them and al
| they may do for you.
The charm of making little sacrifices
quite naturally, as if of no account to your
| self
The habit of making allowances fol-
the opinions, feelings or preiudices O
others.
I IAN erect carriage-that is, SOUND
body.
"A good memory for faces, and fact.
connected with them-thus avoiding Civ.
ing otfense through not recognizing or bow
ing to people, or saying to them what had
best be left unsaid.
"The art of listening without impa
thence to prosy takers and smiling at the
twice-told tale or joke"
cannot help thinking that the last
aphorism aims at too high a standard
There is always certain amount Of
danger in any attempt to cultivate impos
sible virtues. However, it is only fair tc
add that Lady Bellairs recognizes the i'm
portance of self-development quite as much
as the Importance of self-denial; and there
is good deal of sound sense in everything
that she says about the gradual growth and
formation of character. Indeed, those who
have not read Aristotle, upon this point
might, with advantage, read Lady Bellairs