The Arizona champion., 1888-09-29
WEEKLY CHAMPION
HITS OF FUN.

of pedaling without a license. - Detroit Free Press.
 A man makes his maiden speech when he asks O young girl to marry Lim.--N. o. Picayune.
 Truth told now does not shame the Devil, but as a novelty it at tracts his attention.-N, O. Pie nyune.
 The most curious thing/about a falsehood is that it cam got over SC much territory by simply lying around..-Binghampton Republican,
 A boiler which exploded out West few days ago was said to be us thin as paper. It was attached to stationary engine, of course.- Pittsburg Chronicle,
 Patient old Lady (to elevator boy reading dime -noyel)-How often does the elevator go up, boy Elevator Boy-it goes up at the end of every chapter, maam'~~ Time,
 Young Wife--Before we were married, George, you never smoked in my presence. Young Husband --I know it, my dear, and you never wore curl-papers in mine Texas Siftings.
 Celestial Messenger-Here comes the spirit of Sarah Bernhardt. You are not going to let her in, are you St. Pecer tat the gate)-I might as well. If l don't she'll slip through the cracks. .---Cartoon.
 The largest crop of cranberries this country has syeY produced will be gathered this fan; and Yet just about half the politicians will have nothing bu5 crow to go with them during the heliday season.-New Haven News.
 Child-The minister said to-day that in Heaven there was no marry. ing or giving in marriage, Mamma (who had just had little domestic tiff with papa--No, my dear, all is reaee and quiet there,--Philadel- phia Record.
 N Shabby Ireatment-Railroad Oficial--I am exceedingly sorry, but l cannot renew your pass. Citizen lindignqntly)--WhaatI Aud q I've had pass OH your road for fifteen Yearsl Is that the way you treat ola customersl
 Actress Cooking out for some way to advertise hersel0--Do you know anything extraordinary l can do to call the public's attention to mai Staid old person-Yes, get 1arTied and live happily with your usband, Judge,
 A Frank 'Criticism-'What do you think of my poem in the Ga zettee, Wilkinsl" 1t was a re- narkable piece of work. One thing about it l thought was par. ,ularly wonderful" "What was tlAtF "That the Gazette ever published it."
 Dog Vender-You takes this animal l sell him for S5. That is dog cheap. Lady Customr-Is le a particular breedl Dog Vender Nom, he ain't bit pertikeler. He'd just as heves go with you as ith me, so he wud.-Detroit Free scass.
 T'Constant Reader"-No, we n't know of an, actual case where man blew his brains out by blow, ing into the muzzIe of gun to see f 1t was loaded. But we can point ut several cases where the victim lew the top of his head eG,--. JeTe Haute Express,
 ] Freeman-Don't you think this doctrine of infant damaqtion hor- rible onel Sours (slowly)--Well, 1 ont know. l used to think that ny, but since the Howler family nd their new baby moved next nor to me, l am kind of wavering. Lowell Citizen.
 Poor Consolation--Collector--
 d like to knoy when you are
 g to pay this bill, 1 cant be running here every day in the week" DoLtor--"What lty woull suit you bestl" ''Well, I could come again on Saturday" "All right, from now on yoa can call e.e.y Saturday. "-Iexas Siftings. "A convenient ffusUand--Hus- band--Wife, you are everlastingly retding books. Wifc-Yes, 1 find them very interesting, Husband- It's pity l ain't book, then you
 It take some interest in me.
 ie--I wouldn't object if you Are the right kind of book. Husband-What kind of bo k do yoa think husband ought to bel Wife--An almanac, so I get new ,sc~yery year.--Texas Siftings.
 sfss:sing Discovery.
 The discovery by the inhabitants If n localitv bitherto .y tho