davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1888-04-19
HUMOROUS.

-"Confound it, muttered the white
horse, "this is getting to be terribly
tiresome. There is another red-headed
girl"
-"That settles that coffeer' said
Dobbs as he fished an eggshell out Of
his cup with his spoon and waved it in
front of his landlady's face.
With the Treasury Department
using Is, 900 towels month, it looks
as if the financial crash were already
here. Louisville Courier Journal.
"A plumber never asks: "Is it
warm enough for youP" He just
hands You his bill and watches the
perspiration trickle. - Germantown IN
dependent.
Nurse Ito young husband)-"
beautiful ten-pound baby, SIR" Young
Husband getting things mixed in his
excitemenD - GLORIOUS! Am l a
father or mother?"
Youthful ambition: Minister
"Well, Bobby, what do you want to
be when you grow upp" Bobby (suf-
fering from parental discipliRe)-"An
orphan. IN y Sun
Nov look before you lespy' he said,
On witticism bent
| lido" she answered knowingly.
And past him swiftly went.
-Pacifc States Weekly.
Many people in the United States
and Canada who were once as pure as
the beautiful snow have fallen, but
they did not attract the attention that
Niagara does.-BM Nye.
Small Boy to His Big Sister
Edith, do you know why l think you
are like cat that has fallen into a
hogshead of molassesP" Edith-"Be-
cause I'm sweeta" Small Boy-"No.
because you're so stuck up."-Detroit
Free Press.
How do you suppose the slang
phrase, Il am laying for you,' origin
ated?" asked the casual caller of the
snake editor. IAN old hen made
that remark to her owner one day be-
fore Easter" was the reply.-Pitts-
burgh Commercial
"Ah. glad to see you back. old
man. said a local merchant to re.
turned citizen. I'm glad to be back, !"
said the other. Where have YOU
beenT Been over to Boomtown.'
"In business theree" yes" MAKE
any thing?" YES; made an assign.
uent "-Rcdyune.
Bill Collector" How often have
got to climb up five flights of stairs
with this billa" How do l know.
You don't expect me to rent the psrlor
fat just to accommodate my shabby
creditors. do yoG' No. sir. not unless
they advance me money 70 paw ID.
rent, " TsIas Siffiaas.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1888-04-19
PERSONAL AND LITERARY.

Alan Arthur, son of the late ex-
President, is preparing some memoirs
of his father.
Miss Braddon is one of the most
successful Of writer's of fiction. Each
one of her novels pays her about $1S.-
600.
DE Grim, the cartoonist, who
writes his name in four-line plea size
across every piece of work he does, is
son of one of the Cars tailors
The three sons left by the late d.
R. Locke petroleum V. Nasby) are
Arthur, who is newspaper man;
Edward, machinist, and Charlie, a
boy OF seventeen.
--Alphonse Daudet finds his wife
an interchangeable assistant in his liter
airy work, and he gives her unstinted
praise for the extent and quality of her
help in it's performance.
Yam Phou Lee. a Chinese gradu-
ate of Yale, who recently married an
American maiden at New Haven. will
help edit religious weekly to be called
the Chinese Evangelist in New York.
George Bancroft, the historian, is
said to regard the writing of 250 words
as agood days work; Mr.. Blaine made
1900 his stint when writing his recol-
lections, and Admiral Porter dashes off
$500 as rapidly as poet writing UNI
der inspiration.
1t is understood at Holland Patent
that Miss Rose Elizabeth Cleveland re-
ceives $1,000 for her two years serv-
ice and the use of her name as the
head Of Mrs. Reeds school in New
York She is also doing some literary
and magazine work.
The appearance of the only fat
villain in fiction, Count Fosco, is ex-
planned by Wilkie Collins. He says
that "he made him fat because lady
once made the remark at dinner
party that no novelist could make
really life-like fat villain. "
--Ex-President McCosh. of Prince
ton College. is now devoting himself
to literary work. He is at work on
volume to be entitled First or Fun
damental Principles" which, he
thinks, will be the most enduring of
his achievements in philosophy.
"A curious letter from Alfred de
Musset has just been sold at the Hotel
Drouot, Paris. for POS francs A letter
written by Voltaire few days before
his death only made 80 francs Nine
francs more were paid for letter by
Alexandra Dumas the elder. and one
from the ex-Empress Eugene, written
in early youth, sold for 127 francs. A
long epistle by Lafayette found buyer
at lis francs.
Fifteen years ago case came up
for decision before a bench of five
judges involving the question of resi-
dence on British soil as requisite
for obtaining copyright in England,
and while three of the judges decided
in the affirmative two of them held
strongly to the negative. Since then
copyright secured in London by
proper registration and priority OF
publication has never been interfered
with.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1888-04-19
THE LATEST PERIL.
The Phonograph rs Third Party at q
Popping of the Question.

The Monograph rs Third Party at q
Popping OF the Question.
care you in earnest, Mr.. Hankin-
sonP"
The lovely girl who asked this ques-
ton of Marcellus Hankinson sat be-
hind the comfortable with her hands in
her lap, and regarded the young man
intently.
"ln earnest, lrenep" he exclaimed,
pale with emotion and chronic dyspep.
STA; 1.-THE whole happiness of my life is
wrapped up in your answer to the
question | have asked. If you will
trust your future in my hands my life
sshall be devoted to the task of making
you happy. 1t will be my sole aim to
shield you from the rude blasts of all
adversely, to smooth your pathway
through the world, TO interpose my
right arm between you and every dan
ger that threatens to disturb your
peace, and"-
If listen to your suit, Mr.. Han
kinson," interrupted the young lady,
casting her eyes with some timidity
and confusion to the floor. "you may
regret it some day. You would find
me ignorant of the practical duties OF
housekeeping and without
practical duties of housekeepingw
broke in the enthusiastic youth; "you
will have no practical duties of that
kind. As my wife you shall not be a
drudge. You shall be the queen of my
home. You consent do you not. my
| dar-"
"Wait a moment my dear Mr. Han
kinson. l am afraid you would find
me thoughtless and extravagant in a
great many things"
"Extravagant! Irene, it will be the
joy OF my life to provide you with
whatever may crafty your slightest
within. You can never make request
of me that l would not rejoice to an.
ticipate and grant beforehand.
"And you would be willing to spend
all your evenings at homer"
MY angel, never would want to
spend them anywhere else"
"You would never break my heart
by joining disreputable club or be-
coming drinking MANI"
Hear me, Irene. l promise never
to do either"
LET me see." said the young lady.
meditatively; II think that is all-Ol
You will agree to have the word
obey left out of my part of the mar
riage service. will you, Mr.. Hankin-
son?"
"Obey! Hal hal Why, my own.
certainly. am even willing to prom
Use to obey you"
Then, Marcellus," said the lovely
girl as she lifted full-grown phono
graph off her lap, locked it carefully in
a drawer Of the secretary that stood
against the wall turned up the gas
and beamed in a sweet yet business
like manner upon the terror-stricken
young man, II am yours. Chicago
Tribune.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1888-04-19
RACCOON AND SKUNK,
A Close Observer OF the Two Creature
Talks About Their Habits.

A Close Observer of the Two Creatures
Talks About Their Habits.
Though careless observers might not
see any considerable resemblance in
the raccoon to the bear, yet it may not
be improperly called little bear with
long tail. The raccoon is omnivor-
Gus. 1t eats flesh of any kind, preying
upon small birds and animals, when it
can catch them, and sometimes maxi
ing destructive forays into the poultry
yard. 1t devours birds eggs when
ever within reach, procuring the eggs
Of wood-peckers by thrusting its paws
into their holes. 1t also watches klr-
Ties when depositing their eggs in the
sand. and. upon their departure, digs
them up. This animal is fond of fish
and displays remarkable dexterity in
capturing them with its fore paws. II
is also most successful frog hunter,
and may be frequently tracked along
the little streams where it has
oeeh searching Tor frogs, crawtish,
water snails and dead mussels. In
summer, frogs often form large por.
ton of its food, when some species
leave the water and therefore are
easily caught Insects are eaten to
some extent as are slugs and snails.
1t also feeds largely upon variou:
vegetables in summer; and its particu.
lar fondness for green corn is well
known to every farmer When this
grain is in the milk. visit NAV be ex.
pected, If the home of the raccoon:
happens to be near the field; and, in.
Iced. they viii sometimes travel 8
mile or two to obtain feast of Their
iavorite food They pull down the
stalks. or break off the ears. and tear.
ing open the husks. gnaw off the juicy
kernels. generally destroying far more
han they eat They do not carry the
corn away. In winter they will oc.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1888-04-19
ITEMS ABOUT WOMEN.

CLARA FoLTz, of San Diego, Cal.
has declared her intention to vote at
the next election and has handed her
name to the San Diego county clerk for
registration.
Mrs. FRANCES HODGsoN BURNETT is
one of the most industrious of Ameri-
can authors Four of her most popular
novels were produced within period
of fifteen months.
Mrs. QUINCY A. SHAW, daughter of
Professor Agassiz, has for eight years
supported free kindergartens in Boston
and Cambridge, at personal expense
of about $50. 600 year.
WOMEN are gradually becoming ac-
tive in scientific work. The Royal
Geographical Society has decided to
admit them to fellowship, and other
prominent societies will shortly follow
the example.
A NUMBER of New York ladies have
subscribed fund of $1,000 whose in
terest shall be used to pay the college
expenses of the New York woman who
each year shall pass the best examine
ton for entrance to Harvard.
Rosa BoNHEUR dresses in male attire
only when at work. because it gives
her more freedom in her studies at the
menageries and stock yards. On the
street she dresses as do other women
and attracts no more attention.
Miss OLIVE RIsLEY SEWARD, whose
article on "A Diplomatic Episode APP
peared in Scribner. is the adopted
daughter of the late Secretary Seward.
who left her $50. 900 on condition tina,
she should take the name of Seward.
Her home is in Washington.
A SPEAKER prefaced her address to
the ladies of the Woman's Board Of
Missions by quoting the remark of .
coiored woman, who said: We'll Il
the first woman God ever made wa,
able to turn the world upside down. al
these women ought to be able to turn
II right side up again, " Standard
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1888-04-19
A WOMAN'S PORTION.
A Suggestive Story of a Life of Labor and
Its Reward.

A Suggestive Story of a Life of Labor and
Its Reward.
"l've worked long time, as you say;
it lacks but month now of forty years
since we were married."
'And you helped each Of the children
when they were marriedP" queried the
sympathizing neighbor
Eyes. When John was married we
gave him the West place. Abram val
ued that at five hundred dollars. Tfen
we let Mary's husband work at home
here till after their second baby was
born, and he had thousand dollars to
take with him when he went away.
We gave Jimmy five hundred in cash
for an education, but he used it to
speculate on. Then we paid three hum
dred for James piano. and over two
hundred more for music lessons, for
she intended to teach before she mar
ried."
"And how much did Abram leave
your" questioned Mrs Pryy.
"Well, you see he was sick good
many years. and had to let out the
farm. and then land has so deprecated
In value. He thought he had about
seven thousand, but the appraisers
made it out only three-Mary's hus-
band told them that was all it was
worth before they began-and got a
widows third" The speaker leaned
her head YEARLY on her hand, and gaz-
cd out Of the window.
1t was q pleasant place, this old home
of Abram Daley's, and the tears filled
the eyes Of the sorrowing woman as
she remembered that this house that
had been her home since the day she
entered it a happy bride, now almost
forty years ago, was hers no lon
ger. Already the division was going
on, and the sons and sons-in-law were
wrangling over its smooth meadows
and upland pasturage, as a crowd Of
hungry dogs might do over big bone.
"Of course. the judge gave you the
furnitoor-your -settin' -out in particu.
lar. l remember what an orfe nice
settin'-out you had. We girls was al
envious of you"
Mrs. Daley leaned her face a trif,
closer to the window. as she slowly
shook her head. But neighborly eye
are sharp, and, try as she might, sh'
could not conceal the tears that rolled
slowly down her faded cheeks
Not your settin' -outP" cried tn
neighbors in establishment mot you
mahogany bureau and your bird's-ey'
chamber-set and the cherry tables am
stands and the feather beds and then
handsome chairs?"
A long silence ensued, broken at las
by an anxious "Heyw
No" said the widow, sadly. 9Th
f-ihe-well. Mary's husband objecte
90. He said he would have the Who'll
settlement ripped up aud gone over
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1888-04-19
SAVANNAH, TENNESSEE THURSDAY APRIL 49, 1888.

casionally eat the ripened grain, and
have been known to visit open corn
cribs for that purpose. They are also
said to eat acorns and to gnaw through
pumpkins to procure the seeds. Prob
ably, like the bear, they feed more or
less on berries. In confinement, they
are exceedingly fond of sugar.
The raccoon exhibits rowing dis
position, and the males, in summer,
frequently change their places of
abode. Its usual retreat is in hollow
tree, and it never digs for itself,
though in the forest as well as on the
prairie it will occupy the deserted bur-
rows of other animals, and even rear
its progeny in such habitations. From
three to six young are produced. These
grow rather slowly, but are active and
make pleasant pets They exhibit a
remarkable degree of intelligence, and
their monkey-like tricks are very
amusing. Though the raccoon is
chiefly nocturnal it is sometimes found
feeding in cornfields by day. once
observed one with its head and Shout
ders thrust out of hole in large
hickory tree, in which position, if I'M
disturbed, it would remain for hours,
enjoying the sunshine. This mammal
uses its paws with great facility as
hands, always holding objects in both
at once, but not commonly using them
while eating. Its hearing is remarka-
bly, acute, and it seems to depend more
upon this sense as protection from
danger than other animals of this class.
The skunk, unlike the raccoon. is
very slow of foot, but, nevertheless,
succeeds in overtaking many small
animals 1t feeds upon the lesser
mammals, young birds. eggs, reptiles
and insects, sometimes even capturing
rabbits by pursuing them into their
holes. / have often followed the
skunk in the woods, where it had
taken the track of rabbit, like the
mink, and once observed where one
had dragged the body through the
snow to its burrow. 1t is large
feeder, and, owing to the large num-
Der of insects and meadow mice it de-
stroys, is probably of sufficient service
to the farmer to atone for its occa-
sional attacks on the poultry; though,
when it has once found its way to the
poultry yard or hen-roost its de-
struction of fowls and eggs IS very
great The skunk prefers a dry. hilly,
and, if accessible, a rocky locality. 1t
digs readily, and excavates burrows
for its habitation. l have opened its
burrows and found that it digs hole
five to ten feet long and foot or two
below the surface; at the end a large
chamber is excavated, and in this a
soft nest of grass is placed. - Cor.
Ohio Farmer.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1888-04-19
WOMAN'S DEPARTMENT.
THE SONG FOR WORK.
After Hood-A GeneratIon.


,ux c.r.,,o,
WIN myers s.rong anu un"oin'
but eyeIus heavy anu roor
woman hauhts tne SHOPS neatly ei"o4
begging ior neeuie anu 'nreau' m
She cries, in voice that hurts,
10 the man who will pay her forty-fve cents
II she makes dozen shirts.
can "orh all uay' sue .Iiou,
Wheh tne eoch was cro"ihs "iooi
NO work all uay she cries,
"heh inc s'ars slihe through VIC iooi'
Along with the barbarous Turk,
Than Christian woman, with soul TO save,
Who has neither money nor work
one is s'rohg, anu Wiling W WofA
iii ner brain pegiiis W SWIM
one Only asks 10 "orh
III her eyes are heasy anu uiiii'
II were Heaven If she could be
Only too busy to stop
Till her eyes can no longer see!
men win sisters dear,
Tolnng LOT mothers anu WIVES
These others ask put 10 work themselves
through all thelr oreary hVes'
Stitch-stitch-
How gladly would they but sit and work
For the idle and the Rich
Ihere is plenty OF WORK ihueeu
But aias wheh CO. they say
Ihere are plenty Oh WORKERS 'oo'
ana no WORK ior me ,o-oay.
would kiss her lips in glee;
But IL takes so long to die,
When YOU are strong like mel
What kind OF work would do'
Any thing you contrive.
WagesY The merest sum
That will keep me Just alive.
Tonight for a bit OF bread;
And n dozen more-nay. two
For a place to Law nv head.
mo work-no work-no work.
From weary chime to chime;
No work-no work-no work.
Till prisoner works for crime.
They will find me something to do.
Oh, who would dream that the idle Rich
Could keep their wants SO fewi
Work. would gladly work
In the dull December light;
! only ask for work
When the days are warm and bright.
When underneath the caves
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1888-04-19
Personal.

Irate guest-Sir, have not had a
decent meal since have been in this
house.
Landlord-What do you call decent
meal?
Irate guest-Why. decent meal for
a decent man.
Landlord All. that opens up a
question regarding yourself. t. Detroit
Free Press.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1888-04-19
THE MANSION.

a man can build mansion
And furnish it throughout;
A man can build palace,
With lofty walls and stout;
Al man can build temple,
With high and spacious dome;
But no man In the world can build
That precious thing called Home.
So It's happy faculty
or women far and wide,
To turn cot or palace
into something else beside,
Where brothers, sons and husbands
tired,
With willing footsteps come
A place OF rest, where love abounds,
A perfect kingdom-Home.
Janet Jones. In Christidn at Work.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1888-04-19

in the new periodical, Baby. Nine.
vsquelin says that French children
keep very bad hours feed irregularly.
eat every thing and are washed but
once a week.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1888-04-19

Lizzie. did the doctor propose to
you to-day" mo. mamma; he only
asked il you would live with me after
! got married. "-FraRkfwter ZeisHn9
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1888-05-10
TIE LONDONDERRY SITTER.

@-Entcrod at tho Post.ofhos a. South
Londonderry, rs second. class matter.
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1888-05-10
A Chinese C0urtship.

Another curious feature in Chinese
life is reported in the native press. A
difficulty having been found by good
ookiny humpbacked girl in procuring a
husband, the go.betwccn discovered
that an identical difficulty prevented
certain humpbacked young man from
getting a wife She accordingly ar
ranged a match; but as each party was
of very eligible quality in other respects,
each of the respective parents insisted
upon obtaining surreptitious view Of
the amorous one on either side. The
go-between accordingly arranged that
the girl should be interviewed as she sat
at her spinning wheel with her hump
deftly inserted in hole in the mud
wall, while the man was introduce as
he was conducting home water buffalo
and leaning over its neck with his rain
negligently thrown over his back. The
marriage took place, and it then be.
came too late for tergiversstion, as il
had been indorsed by law.-lSan Fran.
cisco Alta
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1888-05-10
A Mule Without Price.

Although mules are slow to act, it Is
said they scent danger as quickly as do
horses, and in instances are as cautious
and as shrewd as elephants. John
Smith Of Rondout is the owner Of q
small mule that knows every inch Of
the towpath of the Delaware aud Hud.
son canal from Eldyville, N. r., to
Honesdale. Penn. Several years ago
the mule was thrown iato the canal by
the line with which it was pulling its
masters boat along becoming snarled
with tho line of another boat going in
an opposite direction. The animal camc
near being drowned, but its inherent
stubbornness probably saved it from
such fate. Since that time the mule
has saved itself many times from being
immersed in the waters of the canal by
its sagacity and by keeping level
head beneath its long ears. During the
working season whenever boat passes
by and the mule feels sudden jerking
as the towlines cross each other, it
reasons that something is wrong, and,
turning around with its mate, it walks
in an opposite dire ction from that in
which it was going until the lines arc
clear of each other and all danger IS
past.
Canalcrs call the mulc "Little Solo
mon' on account of its being SO wise.
A peculiar trait of this mule Is that it
will stretch every inch OF its skin to
kick man, but it will not lift its feet
to kick child. Recently friend OF
Mr. Smith went to the latters barn to
look at the mule. Oa opening the door
the animal caught sight of the stranger,
and, backing up as far as its halter
would allow, it began ''pawing tho
air" with its hind feet. Had tho
roof of the barn been low, fiat one it
would have been lifted from the rafters.
A little boy was called into the barn
and the animal at once became docilc
and submissive and allowed the child
to pass under and around its legs in tho
most friendly manner. A redeemlng
feature about Smiths mule Is that it
never breaks out into loud, rasping
"hcc-haw' in the night time when
people are asleep. A mule like that is
mule above price. New York Times.
The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1888-05-10
How He was Placated,

A friend of mine related to me last
night his experience in reconciling
testy old fellow to the marriage engage
ment of his favorite daughter. My in
formant being discreet and benevolent
character and intimate with all the per-
sons concerned, was persuaded by tho
young people to intercedc on their be-
half. He undertook the task with no
little hesitation, and the reception which
his overtures met was not calculated to
raise any hopes. He began by repre-
senting to paterfamilias the exceeding
cleverness of his would be son-in- law
and the brilliant future which certainly
lies before him. Thi', however, pro-
duced not the least effect, and he sue
ceedcd no better when he fell back upon
the young mans fine moral qualities and
solid worth. At last the potential
father r-iu-law exclaimed: Snow, -,
YOU have told me lot of stuff in praise
| OF tuiS lellOW WIZ WdueS w hA"iiy AhJ
daughter-bo honest, and say what
there is to be said against him."
Being thus taken in flank, as it were,
the family friend, a ridiculously con-
scientious person, admitted, with some
hesitation, that the matrimonial aspirant
is rather unpopular, that his manners
are not pleasant that he is supposed to
be sullen at times. ETC., etc. "HumF
said the old gentleman pricking up his
ears, "has he many friendsa' mo"
the go-betwcen confessed, II am afraid
not" SWELL" the stern parent de-
clared unbending at last. 81 don't
know but what Fanny may have him If
she likes. He is evidently dlsagreeable
enough, but in my opiaion, the kind OF
man that you describe makes pretty
safe husband. Your jolly, popular
men are always spending other peoples
money. Fanny is sensible girl, and 1t
she wants to marry this young fellow
won't stand in the way,"-l Boston
| Post