The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1888-02-22

| the sun and other planets that have rather
| delicate relations with the earth-come to
think OF it, my boy, / have never yet beeo
| able to control my own personal neuralgia
Now, you are very kind, but / will most
respectfully decline the appointment. l
| find, on looking into the varied and trying
duties connected with the office, that my
bodily and mental strength would be LAID
upon them. While 1 am in the heartiest
accord with the administration, and wish
to give is-and to the extent of nv poor
ability do give Tiny most earnest support
and encouragement, yet much prefer to
do this IN my capacity as a private citizen
OUT OF SEASON.
No crowd turns out to see him come: no
bugies drown the echoing drum: no plan
dts fall in vocal showers; no maidens
strev his way with flowers; no police SER
geant's phalaDx stood to hold in check the
multitude; no delegation came to meet;
alone be hoofed il down the street; alone
before the clerk he stands and pens his
name with trembling hands. Awe-slruck
he hears that magDate say: "Fronti Nine
ought forty, tight away !" Alone he
Climbs The distant stairs, and no one
knows and no one cares to what lost room
he has TO climb-the base ball man in
winter time.
THE MATERNAL INSTINCT.
"Oh, yes, said Mrs. Whackem, as they
were discussing the funeral over the front
gate, he'll marry again inside of six
months. / know these widowers. MY
second husband was a widower, and them,
them poor-Blllee, you little wretch, if
you try to ride that pig again I'll tear you
limb from limb-chilren of Martbs's IL
have to suffer. Don't care what you say,
Mrs. Easy, and don't care-Charley, come
here this minute 1 see you ire that rock
at old Uncle Stowe; take that and that
and that! Now, hush your crying this
minute, or to bed you go right straight
without any SUPPER don't care how good
hearted and well meanin' a woman may
be, other women's children amt what her
own are to her, and she can't treat 'em as
kindly. MsrthG's children III miss their
mother, anG-AnnR Louisa, you nasty lit
tie brat! do you want me to come in
there and kill yOu?-if hadn't so many
of my OWL, I'D take some of 'em myself
and give EN- mothers love and care Just
the same as my own get-Jim, you Jim!
II that boy hasn't klndled a fire on the en-
try floor; I'll iust run in and break every
bone in Jour carcass-don't go way Mrs.
Easy, I'll be right back. La me- that boy
III kill me yet; | beat him till my arm
aches, and FL pct he is in some Few Eais-
chef already. No, as was saying, step
mother doesn't have and can't have
mothers feelings toward our own children.
NUGGETS OF FUN.
You get your daughters up most beau
tItully, Mrs. Hebe." "Yes, that Is art"
And you get them into society 50 early"
THAT is mart" "And you find rich hus-
bands for them" THAT is smart"
Love, lie an spgel comes with wings,
Love. like Sers phi, swee ly siBgs
Love, like honey-oee, sweetness brings
And once in while like hornet stings.
Yes, said the deacon, yes, little pitchers
have great ears, but that doesn't prove mat
every baseball player is an ass. Oh no,
not every one. TIE greatest men, il is said,
are the simplest, but the sim plest men are
not the gr' atest; not By Jug full. A
man may trample on his conscience all
through the buy day, but when ne lies
down at night, or stretches himself on a
bed OF sickness, conscience puts the spurs
on and rides him till dsybTeak. You put
fancy Uniform on q man, an let two |
tbousaI people pay fifty cents each to
watch him, and he will saw wood as hard |
rs he viii play baseball.
4 Western poet gays she is "too sad TO |
weep, too tired to pray" Is that go? We'll, |
tired.
a new music hall bss solved the big-has- |
al beopers problem. The balconies are |
raised al such steep pitch that the feet of /
the listener come on y level with the shout /
ders OF the person sitting in.front of him.
Ard when the woman with hat like a
drop curtain comes in and sits down before
fellow, the fellow does not care a CONT.
mental for the Eat. In fact he rather likes
it. He lays his programme, handkerchief
and opera-glasses upon it. This pleases
the audience, and it smiles. The woman
does not know what is the racket, and
thinks she is attracting attention, and so
she smiles. Thus everybody is pleased
ana the little woman with steeple-croTn
hat is no more Of NUISANCE than the fell
low who scram bles out over your knees to
go out after some cloves.
Another faster A man in Ohio has
gone twenty-eight DAYS without eating
anything. The name OF the paper he is
editing is not given.
-
What is a typographical error, my boy?
Well, whore you read q newspaper inter-
view in which Mr.. Blaine speaks of Mr..
cleveland as the greatest statesman of the
whose brilliant administration
and magnetic influence is only equalsd by
nls sagaclous judgment, you may safely
put up few margins on boom In typo.
graphical errors
Ella Wheeler Wilcox truly sings: "We
build our own ladders to climb to the
Ky" Certainly we do. And we'd get
here, too, II we only built enough ladders
md made them long enough.
The trouble with us is, that
after splicing the ladders until we get
about the fifth story, we decide
% sit down and economic breath by wait
ng for the elevator. And then half the |
ime fellow steps into the elevator when
t is on the down trip.
ROBERT J. BURDETrE.