West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1888-03-22
MINOR MENTION.
Woodmsn, chop that treel
I'll burn IL every bough.


I'll burn IL every bough.
In youth Il sheltered me,
But coal eight dollars now.
Chicago Mail,
Everybody has some vein Of poetry In
him but IN nine cases out of ten IL would
be money in his pocket il that vein were
filled with blood Puck.
During the past ten years no less than
six 'pecies Of North American birds have
become extinct. and is claimed that the
gish sparrow has been the main
cause OF their disappearance.
During the great bill zzard in the West
22l sheep were buried in the snow at
HardiDg's ranch, near Atkinson, Neb..
aud were 2 ven up IA dead. When they
were dug out few days ago 10 were
found 20 be still alive. They had eat en-
the wool from each other 3 back.
Ardent lover (on his kuees(-Can you.
then, doubt my affection, darling7 IL
l. eternal as the hiil3-everlasting as the
valleys. All ask. sweet st, Is your
ar hand. Languid beauty-Ask me
pw, eorgie. Ardent lover (risino
from his knees)-Ah-e yo r
paw, dazzling : Binghampton 'Republi-
can
Newark, New Jersey. must be great
temperance town, remarked Mr.. NcS
Co'kie. WbyP asked Briggs. Be
cause fifteen million corkscrews are turn
ed out there every year. How does
that prove it is temperance town.
'Becsuse it would keep the corkscrews.
inst ad Of turning them out, il it were
not - Puck
lloar, OF Michigan, has been counting
the dogs, and finds that there are 11,S
600, 600 Of them in this country. A New
York Senator says that thirds of the
sheep industry of the country has beeu
destroyed by them, and Brooklyn man
backs up the statement by quotations
from Stale secretaries, showing that the
killing OF sheep by dogs ranges from
$4,000 to 40, 900 each year in the differ
ent states. The wool industry is in
need Of protection which is not TO be
had from customs duties.
Tie Folly of women-'I think that
the modern woman has nightly little
sense. She will sacrifice health and
comfort and everything else in order to
he fashionable" "There is some truth
in that" Now fairly adore my wife,
but. an not blind to her weakness.
Some of her freaks in dress are fairly
barbarous 1t is the same with all wo,
men. BY the way, that's a laundering
old tile you have on. Why are YOU
wearing such thipg2" ooh, know
IT'S terror, bYt it's all the style in New
York now. i have just come from
there, you w."-Lincoln journal
Some of the best authorities say that
the moderate use of pure tobacco NAV
be beneficial 10 such as need nerve
soother. This cannot be demanded uu-
I'll the nervous system has become mrre
or less irritable from acti exercise or
disease The legitimate habit, il such
1t may be called cannot be formed un,
til after the person has been actively
engoged in the duties OF life, unless the
disposition t. It has been inherited We
may conclude, therefore, that those
who learn to smoke vnd chew because
others do it hive burdened themselves
with an unnecessary habit These per
sons can easily break off the habit, and
ought to do so Tn many instances thew
doaiter reaching middle age.
Phil Armour surveys his varied affairs
DIV The AID of an account book. six feet
wide when closed. Opened, it stretches
from one end ( his little private office
to tie other. IL is novelty in the line
oil stationary. Mr.. Armour doesn't car
ry it~around with him. nor docs he have
II on his desk. But when he comes 10
look at summary OF all his different in
'erests, he can mt a glance on a single
plge OF this very broad book see the
ba ances taken from a score Of different
ledgers. The book was devised by the
skilled accountant who a few wears a O
had chnrge of the Armour office. Its
purpose is to save the milio aite the
labor OF going from one ledger to ano,h
er to find out how he stands at his bank,
at his packing houses. in his specula.
tons aud his investments.
Judge Gray was hearing case that
called FOR jury trial. and after the usual
wrangling hat always tries his patience
the jury was Sc ee'ed and sworn The
Judge settled back in his chair. thinking
ttat the case was fairly started when uD
jumped little German who was SITTING
IN one end Of the jury box. "Shud, u"
he eXcla med. "W ell, what is it2~ Ask
ed the judge, shortly. "Shudge. t'ink
like to go home +" 'sYou can't co. cir
down" 6 nudge ], doan tink [ make
good shuror." ''You're the best in tile
panel. Sit DOWN. "Wen. shudpe. {"
aud the little fellow wss getting des.
perate. Il doan' speak good English. -
You'll not Lave to speak any at all -
And, Shudge, | caa't make nodings
oudt Of vot does felleIs Indicating the
attoneys) are talking aboudt ." "Thats
no excuse Neither can INV ono alea