The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1888-02-09

Young Man tcalmly) )-Yea, sir; but IL
you had dosen I wouldn't want but one.
Plumber Ito applicant for work.
Where were you employed last?
Applicant-I was making out bills for
an iceman all summer, and
Plummer-Thats enough. You may
consider yourself engaged for the winter.
"A young preacher picked up Bishop
Pierce's hat and put it on his own head,
and it was exactly fit. "Why, bishop"
said he, I" your head and mine are exactly
the same size" "Yes," replied the
bishop, on the outside. Little Rock
Methodist.
Wife (who prides herself on being
sensible)-John, do you notice how easy
fitting roy new shoes are?
Husband-Yes.
Wife-Well, do you know why L get
my shoes 20 large?
Husband Gust triie nonplussed) )-Er
mo, my dear, unless it is because you
have large feet.
-"I never saw anything in the way of
wood as large - the trees in the Yose-
mite, said Flip.
"No," snapped Mime. FHip, "you never
saw anything in the way Of wood any
way"
It was her stress on the asawn that
msde Flip look uncomfortable.
1t was few minutes before dinner
when little Fred inquired:
Mamma, have been bad to-day?
Yes, FRI ddie; very bad indeed"
DO you think you will send me to bed
without any supper?'
= " have great mind to.
Well, mamEla, I wish you would let
me know now 80 that can tell how much
dinner to eat" ."-MercAant Traveller.
Laura" said the young man de-
spairingly, q" I know it is growing late,
hut this may be the last evening / shall
ever see you. If there is no hope for
me, Laura-if your answer this night is .
final one-there is no happiness for me
in this world except in the grave. Wide
and deep it yawns before me, but l fear
it not. It yawns-"
$50 do l. George, 50 do l." said Laura,
wearily- Chicago Tribune.
=" How are you and your wife coming
on ?" asked an Austin gentleman of .
colored man. tfio" - 80 ,- La
She has run nae Of, boss" tau no
What's the matter Pr .4keas s.l.s.i
"Ps to blame, boss. i gave her .
splendid white silk dress, and den she
got 50 proud she isd no use for me. She
said was to dark to match de dress"
"A lady who had been abroad was de-
scribing some of the sights Of her trip TO
her friends.
"Bus what pleased me most of any
thing" abe continued, swas the Stras-
burg clock"
"Oh, how should love to see It."
gushed sweet companion. al am 50
interested in such foreign sights. And
did You see the Watch on the Rhine r.
VERY Singular.-Prof Snore, the alb
sent-minded professor of the University
of Texas, recently put his foot in it again.
reception. Meeting Miss Esmeralda Long
coffin, he said Good evening, madam,
is your husband here this evening ?'
Why, professor, don't you know that
am still single ?" replied Esme.lda, blush
ing. IL that so So yoa are sshl single.
Then suppose your husband 10 also
single. Give him my regards when you
meet him -""-Isras Sbsings
"A little boy aud his sister came home
from the closing exercises At one Of the
public schools the other day. The eeftif-
oates tor regular astendancs and COED
attend noe had been distributed aud the
girl was the proud recipient of one of
them, but her brother had faiieduo Quail
Nv. 1919 y aaa.s ftis Tsll34i.k AZ IS
Didn't you get osrti6osts, Temmy p
thosv rnotknv ssko1
Nom" WAS the reply, but l would
have got one if there had been enough to
60 round" 't'e1e ~ slisi,.S sidi
Z~I cannevsr be snythms more 70 you
than sister, Mr. Nevias, said Mics
Kajonea With . anonking smile. st >
Rslinda," !" said the yopng maa bitter
y, - be took hiA hat lWalked 20 the door
with I siow, despaifing, Henry George
movemens, and stood oh the thresholda
momsns syos viii live ~ Eegrss tia. i
am going % open . large sapdy store
next week" -,
90, Leonidas Leonidas / am yours !'
But SIZE spohs u che rsmpty air. 4t was
forever too iates He hadgoss.T :svs.
aa--An slegss1ly astisds nss,aa got cut
Of . car - TyensS-thisd street yesterday
afternoon, and on reaching the side-vslk
this conversation betveen her and Aiittie
female street 4Amsn xas heafd! ssFreI
o1 sPfsass bay eosne spinAs iisdy.fr7As
asSAns dsssasds oss's gnf rsaepsse vss
Z e; .!s: l..l. sas Ps'''''sa III P',,. give
q THs ssais i1,saSIyt t4sat ttssaszra said .nlsrf
you wuei ei1lm1yyoul1 1ski01 0bBpennR.s