Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1888-12-30
Mr.. AND MRS. B0WSER
SIGNS OF BACTERIA IN NR. B0WsER'S
H0NR.
Hs Proceeds to XII the Reptiles By Fumiga-
ton-RssulS Of the Sans IS Usual Of
Course, Ms B's Pa1lt
Detroit Ere Press.

Time. One cay ne CAME NOME an noul
ahead of time, his countenance wearing 6
very important look, and the first thing b,
did was to bolt up stairs to our bedroom
and lower thu window, although I hat
Just closed it after airing the room fsf two
hours. He then came Gathering down L
ask me for pan.
What on earth do you want of psnP'
I asked.
ITO save all our lives!" he answered.
"Ho1?"
Your bedroom is full of poison Gus gases,
which must be absorbed by an open vessel
Of water"
''Nor sensew
81 expected it. That's the weapon Of
theignorant! Mrs Bowser, if you want to
die by poisonous gases poisoning the blood
l have nothing TO cay, bat I shsll save the
life of our child if possible. have felt a
strange lGssitude for several days, and a
sanitary plumber tells me that we have
POISONED air in the room."
"Yuur lassiuds couldn't have come from
b4iug out TO. club and lodge four sue.
ce ,slve nights until II o'clock, could it?''
He seized the pan and hurried upstairs,
and when he filled it at tie lavatory he eat
il in the middle of the floor and came down
with relieved look on his face, to say:
''See if you don't feel better tomorrow
than you have for month. It's a won
der we are not all dead"
Ibid the ACCENTS know about these
poisonous gases?" asked.
Not a thing. They never gave them q
thought"
And yet the average of health was II
per cent above that Of to. day, and the av-
erage OF mortality that much lower! How
do you sc.ount f5r th,t?"
'Oh, well, if you want to die, go ahead
I'll ever buy rrpe and help yeu to hang
your,elf ! expected this, Of course, but
tic cule never moves me, Mrs. Bowser-
neverl"
Two hours later he went upstairs in his
slippers to look for paper in another coat,
and of course he eat his foot plump do n
in that pan Of water. There was yell
and jump, and over went the pan and
when l got up there he stood holding up
one leg, as YOU have seen hen do on a
wet day. What I said on that occasion
kept Mr.. Bowser quiet for a whole week.
Then he began to grow restless sgain, and
one hight he brought home suspicious
locking package and sneaksd it ups' airs
After .upper he suddenly disappeared, and
when looked for him upstairs he had
something in basin and WAS about to ho.d
it over gas-baraer.
"Mr. Bowser, have you get a new
theory?" l asked.
Look here, Mrs. Bowser," he replied as
he put down the basin, you have heard of
bacteria, I presume?"
eyes, sir"
"They sre the germs Of disease floating
about. They are alive. II inhaled chol-
era, yellow fever and other dread diseases
are the result. Fumigation kills them. "
"Aud you are going to fumigate this
rocm ~
lam. am going to kill eff the dreaded
bacteria"
well, you'll drive US out of the house
or kill u.s."
1 went down stairs and he burned a
compound of tar AID sulphur. In ten
minutes we had to open doors and win
dove, and the cook came running in TO
ask:
is it cremation Mr.. Bowser is trying
on u,?" =,
Il am simply driving out the bacteria, "
he replied, coming downstairs at that mo-
ment.
"Aud there's bacteria in the house ?"
''I'm afraid 3d."
"And I've worked here four weeks under
the noses of the dreadful creatures? Mr..
Bowser, QUITS! quits now"
And quit she did. We had to sleep on
the sitting-rcom floor that night, and
three weeks later every caller could still
detect that oior. 1t was hardly gone,
however, when Mr.. Bowser began 10 snuff
around again.
ANY more bacteris?" l asked.
"Mrs Bowser, if you want to sit here
and die I have no objections, but l dou''
propose to regi,ct common sense precsu'
ito, 8 10 preserve my health"
'Is anything wrong now?"
Il think 80. I think / can detect ar
odor of sewer g.s in the house"
'ImJ ossible! 1 shan't have no mora
stuff burned until know it is necessary. v
won't you? If thare is sewer gas here
it must he eradicated at once"
For the next week the whole houst
smellt d of chloride Of lime until one could
hardly draw a lang breath, but Mr.. Bow
nv x-ao MT 90 fishad
II have been thinking," he said to mt
one evening, THAT may bring the germl
of some terrible disease home in my
clothes. ride on the car, you know, ant
I ought tn take precautions"
"HoW?"
"Csrry dis;n'eotan about me to !epe
the germs"
at might be good idea"
"Now you are talking sense. Now yoI
SEEM to understand the p:rIl which ha
menac:d US"
He got something down town the mex
dsy. think some of his friends put up
JOB on him, knowing his crsza. 1t was
compound which lett him alone on tn
street car before he had ridden thre
blocks, and he had no sooner got into tn,
house than we bad TO retire to the bscl
doors The cook got sniff Of it, ant
down went the dinner and up went he
hands. and che shouted at B0wser:
"a man as would keep skunk unde
his house ould beat me out of my wage:
and I'll be going this minuten'
It took soap and water and perfumer
and half days time to remove the odol
and when I declared that it was the Les
straw Mr.. Bowser crossed his hands unde
his coat tails and replied:
"Mrs. Bowssr, I believe this house to b
clear of bacteria, owing to my prudenc
and self-sacrifce, and 1 want 1t kept so.
II suppose get 'em hereT
without doubt, madam
"And all this runpus has been on m
account?"
ggE-,otIv pul dnr,k mn ton far With MI