The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1888-09-08
A DUDES DILEMMA.
He Couldn't Spell Narragansett, So He
Had to Go to Newport.
From, the Philadelphia Times.

From the Philadelphia Times.
The St James hotel is torn upside down on
account of the many repairs which Capt. Conner
is having made in that favo-ite hosiery. The
resultant confusion has removed the type
writer's brass railing corner from one of the
Broadway windows back toward the clerk 5
desk, and temporarily left in front of il one Of
the large leather-covered Settees in which
guests Of the hotel lounge. Twas ensconced a
| recent afternoon in a corner of this snug haven
or rest My reading was suddenly disturbed by
| the voice Of someone addressing the young
woman typewriter The accent was so high
and so nearly effeminate that l turned TO see
inc gender. found the speaker was dressed
that be was a Louisville dude, and one of a
| party OF eight from Mr.. Wattersons home,
who had registered at the ST. James. He
young lady in louisville, informing her that he
| would reach that city at a certain time. and re-
ouesting her to invite eight couples" to a
theater box party which he and friend de-
note to the typewriter, only he pronounced the
feminine prohoun as though spelled bah:
Tell her that am reparing-arranging. you
know-getting ready-ah, fixing my luggage in
shape to go to NarTaganseu Pier this evening.
and that | will be in Louisville about Saturday
week. Just fix that idea to suit yourself.
NO; we don't do that way" said tue pretty
young typewriter, with toss of her thickly
tressed head Il am only here to do typewrit-
ing: Anything you dictate to me 1 will print
on the mschine "
Well, you know / am not a bit particular"
said the Louisville imbecile; young lady is not
particular, either. Just fix it up in your own
way and il will be'all right "
Evidently the little woman was not certain of
her own powers, for she said: NO we don't do
business that way don't compose letters. 1
am only a typewriter. You viii have TO dictate
to me. And she looked straight before her
with compressed lips.
Well gssped the youth from Kentucky,
with long-drawn breath, begin by saying
that am preparing TO go TO Narragansett Pier
The little. rose tipped fingers played over the
machine as though It were a piano, and when
IN few moments the 'tip-tap" music ceased,
the maiden repeated in mechanical way: Il
am preparing 10 go to-what is the name of
that place."
'Narragansett Pier replied in an absent
minded way, the young man, who was evidently
mentally struggling with the further erection
or his verbal structure.
How do you spell Narragansett?" asked the
publics secretary.
The Louisvian looked at her blankly for
moment, and then began: "N-i-a"-then he
hesitated, and Suddenly as his face frightened
not right. You spell it your own way. Just plain
NarragaESett, you know
Il can't spell it, said the young woman de-
cisively, as she crossed her hands on her lap,
We'll, I'm sure l can't" replied the embar
raised correspondent hopelessly.
Neither cal l, said the typewriter, indiffer
emily. What viii we do aboutitY"
The maiden appeared as serene as a June
morning. The youths brow was knitted in
what to him was thought. He was evidently
sadly peTplexed. Suddenly the creases were
smoothed and his face lighted as he exclaimed
IN tell you what Wen do, I'll go to Newport.
You can spell Newport, can't your
Had not heard all this myself I would not
believe the narrator of IT,