Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1888-05-02
SOME WITTY ANSWERS.
Amusing Remarks Made IN English Courts
of Law.

AhESmR remarks d1AAe III Eng 1ASh CO01I3
of Law.
Our courts of law have furnished Us
at various times with very witty and
amusing remarks, lawyers and prison.
ers alike being guilty on this score.
Doubtless every one has heard of the
Irishn1an who, in reply to the cues
ton: Guilty, or not guiliy?" said The
would like to hear the evidence before
he would Plead A magistrate in
another case was dealing with Ga va
grant, and in severe tone addressed
him thus: You have been up before
me half q dozen times this year,
thercb, giving him to understand that
he had appeared too often on the
scene. The prisoner, however, was
equal to the occasion, Cor he replied:
Come, now: jadge-none Of that.
Every time I've been here I've seen
you here You are here more than I
am. People who live in glass houses
shouldn't throw stones.'
Curran, the Irish advocate, was one
day examining witness. and. failing
10 get direct answer, said: There
is no use in asking you questions, for
see the villain in your face DC
you, sir?' said the man, with {. smile.
Fax, never knew before that my
face was a looking-glass.'' On ale
other occasion he was out walking
with friend who was extremely
punctilious in his conversation. The
latter, hearing a person near him say
curiosity for curiosity. exclaimed:
How that man murders the English
languager Not so bad as that" re.
piled Curran; The has only knocked
an cui!'
Prisoner at the bar'' said Judge.
us there any thing you would wish to
say before sentence is passed upon
you?' The prisoner looked toward
the door. and remarked that he Wotil6
ike to say Good evening. if it wa:
agreeable to the company"
Il remember" says Lord Eldou,
Mr.: Justice Gould trying a case at
York. and when he had proceeded FOR
about two hours he observed: Here
are only eleven jurymen in the box;
where is the ,welf,h?' Please you.
my lord said one of the eleven, he
has gone away about some business;
but he has left his verdict with me- !"
This is almost on par with case
tried in Que Of the Lancashire courts.
when SERGEANT Cross was a resident
barrister in that county. The jury.
having consulted AMI agreed upon
their verdict, were addressed BY the
clerk of the peace: How say you.
gentlemen of the jury; do you find
for the plaintiff or the defendant?''
What sayn 20? Idunnot under.
stand" said the foreman.
why. as you have decided. all ]
want to know is whether your verdict
is for the plaintiff or the defendant
The foreman was still greatly en-
barrassed; but he replied: ''Whoy, l
rally dunnot know. but we're for him
as Mester Cross is for
Lord Cock burns looks, tones. Ian.
guage and manner we're always such
as to make one think that he believed
every word he said On one occasion,
before he was raised to the
bench. when defending a murder
er. although he failed to convince
the judge and jurymen of the inno-
cence Of his Client yet he convinced
the murderer himself that he was in
nocent. Sentence of death was pro-
nounced. and the day of execution
fixed for, say. the 2o5h of January: As
Lord Cockburn was passing the con-
demned man. the latter seized him
by the gown, sayingt 4 have not
got Justice Mi. Cock burn-I have not
got Justice" 10 this the advocate
coolly replied: Perhaps not; but
You'll get it on the 20,h Of January"
Chambers Journal