davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Mountain Home bulletin. (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1888-1889, 1888-10-20
A DECLINING SPECIES.
Something About the characteristics oi
the Old Fashioned Tramp Printer.

something About the Characterization OF
the Old-Fashioncd Tramp Printer.
No mere machine would ever fill the |
place Of the old-fashioned printer. COM
monty known as tramp. He belongs
10 separate species of the human race.
He has no hesitation in correcting the
editors manuscript, and making him
say things he would not say. 1t is idle
for the editor. TO say he is right. The
old-fashioned printer has travelled more
and knows better. If the editor. by
pertinacity, docs finally succeed i'll get
ting passage corrected the way he
wants it, it is disagreeable to see the
old-fashioned printer slam his rule
down on the case and start of with the
galley toward the imposing stone with
the remark that there are number OF
chumps in the West who imagine, be-
cause they are able to write few lines.
that they know more than the universe.
He doesn't say so, but we instinctively
feel that he means us, and necessarily
he must be the universe. Whatever
may be the politics of the paper on
which the old-fashioned printer works.
his are invariably the opposite. This is
to show that he is not to be coerced.
He will borrow dollar from the pro-
prietor, and then go off and vote against
the proprietor's interests, just to show
his independence. He can umpire a
baseball game, conduct class
meeting or give temperance
lecture while he is full uT
TO the neck. He is consistent in one
thing. He opposes Chinese labor. ant
never patronizes a Chinese laundry. /
is true that he rarely patronizes an
other laundry, but that does not de
teriorate from his consistency. He vii
borrow a quarter from the editor, ant
then denounce the EDITORS greennes
! for lending it to him. He would rathe
l steal a ride on freight train than t.
: travel on a pass in a palace car. II
has a profound hatred for boarding
house keepers, and with not cent i
his pocket does not hesitate to CRITICS
Q the bill of fare in the most severe terms
= Give him quarter to buy drinks, an
a he may spend part OF it for somethin
s to eat; give him quarter to buy victual
y and the money is sure to go for whisky
o And yet. with all these contrarities, W
r should hate to see the old-fashione
Q printer supplanted by a machine
|. When almost starving himself he wi
l. divide his last penny with brotht
70 printer Memories of mother an
& sister cause him to respect womanhoo'
L And when he lies down to die, it ma
ss be in the bottom of a freight car, or
1T the corner of fence, with nothing
10 wrap his shivering form but his dilaE
IS dated clothing, a generous heart oft,
10 ceases to beat with his last breath. WI
lg shall say that in the hereafter there
I'd not better future for the old-fashion'
le printer?-Peoria Transcript.
Mountain Home bulletin. (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1888-1889, 1888-10-20

Toto has been expressly forbidden
to touch anything upon papa's library
desk, and has had the lesson painfully
enforced upon several occasions. The
other night discussion arose as to the
origin Of certain word. The diction-
ary was found on papa's desk, but the
word was not in it. ''It's very strange" 7"
says papa. THAT word is certainly
missing, and yet it ought to be there. :"
Toto, with fearful earnestness-''I
can't help it papa-I really didn't take
it, French.
Mountain Home bulletin. (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1888-1889, 1888-10-20
ODDITIES OF NAMES.
How Honest Pierre Feurstein Came to
be Called Peter Gun.


be Called Peter Gun.
There is man on Sixth avenue,
New York, who rejoices in the title of
Peter Gun. He has been through
more changes of name than a woman
five times married. The appellation
left him by his father. who was na-
tive of Alsace, was half German, as
are SO many of the Alsatian names
After the Franco-Prussian war and the
annexation of his province, he became
disgusted with life under Teutonic
rule, and determined to emigrate to
Canada. To America he came, bear
ing still intact his patronymic OF
Feurstein. The French acquaint-
ances he made in Quebec entirely re-
fused to accept this version of two we'll
known words, and translated his name.
Pierre de Feu he was called in the
French quarter of the old Canadian
town, and the English inhabitants fol-
lowed their suggestion Of paraphrase
and dubbed him Mr.. Flint. good En-
glish equivalent of Feurstein. In
course of time Mr.-well, any thing
you choose to call him-drifted to New
York, and into the part of town inhab-
tied by his countrymen. Here he was
again translated literally from Mr..
I Flint into Nj. Pierre de Fusil, and so
remained until his business brought
him permanently out of the French
part OF town, and he underwent his
fourth translation into Peter Gun, and
will probably so remain until he makes
another move. Mr.. Gun is a jovial
person, and regards this instability of
name with cheerful philosophy.
He says the only objection he
has is that people who are
not familiar with the circum-
stances are apt to look with a
certain suspicion upon the fact that
letters are addressed to him under all
five Of his involuntary aliases, which
savors somewhat of the methods of
green goods and confidence men.
There has been a young Virginian
there at the Hoffman House who labors
under disadvantages of the sort, but
his is an inherited defect and not
brought upon him by his own careless
ness or indifference. He always has
difficulty in getting his letters and the
cards of callers from the fact that he
spells his name Ennoughty and calls it
Darby. When a man comes in and
asks for Mr. Darby the clerk naturally
turns to the letter ID in the registry
and, when he can't find it, declares
there is, as Mrs. Camp would say,
mo sich person in the caravansary
or. If the gentleman comes in
person TO the Office and inquiries for
letters for Mr.. Darby, the clerk per-
emptorily declines to hand over the
mssives addressed to Mr.. Ennoughty
Mr.. Ennoughty has learned through
troublesome experience to make this
whole matter clear to the hotel clerk
when he registers and, when he is in
troduced to a young woman. to spell
his title for her at once, SO that II ht
subsequently calls the young lady il
not forced to puzzle over his card ane
finally.aecide that she has met no sucf
man, and consequently refuse to SEE
him. He declares it to be an endless
/. inconvepience and annoyance, but
sort oiLamily pride in the uniquenes
of the situation prevents his choosing
definitely and finally between En-
noughty and Darby. = Brooklyn Eagle
Mountain Home bulletin. (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1888-1889, 1888-10-20

When you talk about woman's con-
stancy, don't quote figures, because
figures prove that two wives elope to
one husband, and that three widows re-
marry to one widower. Seyen-tenths
OF the broken marriage engagements
are broken by the female side. 1t is
man-cruel, tyrannical man-who loves
to stick, and sticks to see that her
grave is kept green.-Detron Free
Press.
Mountain Home bulletin. (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1888-1889, 1888-10-20
PHILOSOPHER DuNDeR.
The Wise Old Tcuton Makes Some Apt
General Observations.

General Observations.
II i vhas to live my life oafer again
expect do no peter ash pefore. No
pody knows how to live until he vhas
aboudt ready to die.
Nopody vhas sooch a good friendt to
me dot he can tell me whore | should
reform onless get mao nit him. 1t
vhas human nature dot we all believe
we vhas good enough.
In trying to get something for moth
ing in dis world we cheerfully buy two
dollars worth of cigars for der man
who gifts us teeket to feefty-cent-
show.
doan' see some loafers around mid
out wonder dot Nature vhas so fool
ish. She could sh,lst us well haf used
oop dot material to grow fence-rails
and hitching posts.
If you find me some man who vhas
satisfied init der weather und der peo-
pies und der world, l show you some
pody who vhas ripe for either Heafcn
or der idiot asylum.
When like to pound on my drum
forget dot | haf some neighbors whC
may like to shleep. When like to
shleep myself my neighbor should be
put in shall If he plays on der piano.
We like man who shpeaks de-
truth by us, und yet shust so soon asl
he tells us something unpleasant w
vhas mad at him.
When hear "A boy whistle feel safe
| know dot SO long as he whistles h.
doan' put up some shop to shteal m,
; apples or carry off my front gate.
= If you take mans bad luck un,
y trace it back you vhill discover dot h
!, vhas to blame ten times where some
Y pody else vhas once, und yet he remen
e bers only dot once.
$ doan' like man to be too liber,
Z nit me. especially a doctor in prescril
o ing large doses,
o 1t vhasn't so much dor darkness
l. vhas afraid of When night comes, bl
n maype do something's mean or wicke
Z, by daylight.
Z, If you keep your eyes open you Viii
G see dot charity works hard all summe
while most of her beneiiciaries sleep
L aer shade or loafs nit der saloons.
3, We doan know some men until dc
n vhas gone to der bad. Den it vhas v
I, hear afcry pody say how shmart VI
n talented dey vhas all der time.
in Der best frendt | eafer had becan
Is my enemy as soon as | lent him fife d,
It. lar mitout security. Dot same m;
It. would have mortgaged his house al
of lot to somepody else und felt dot it VII
re >nly pcesness.
re Sometimes it seems to me dot d
It. world vhas too wicked to stand mu
" on@er. und dot IL vhas hard to find o
lnnest. upright man. | take some liv
rs ledicine, und 10! der next day
on york vhas good enough und all m
Id has all right.
at ! huf seen funeral procession a m
he ng, und two weeks later | haf ask
p; no vhas buried dot day, und nopo
ais .,uld remember When Il man e
:" rough nit der world der world VI
is Arough nit him.
he A hypocrite vhas a bad man, und .
ci- pmetimes ] vhas glad to meet "a {
its Tho doan' tell me who he vhas.
of When | see a woman cry | feel
a raise der wisdom Of Nature. If s
i. q buldnt shed tears she would p
it omepody's hair.-DetroI Free Press
Mountain Home bulletin. (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1888-1889, 1888-10-20
ENGLISH FROM BOOKS.
Amusing Linguistic Biunders Made by n
Foreign Lady.

roretSn Aauy.
A couple of instances of the amusing
blunders foreigners may make in speak
ing English We're given me the other
day, and have every reason both to
believe them genuine and that they
have not before been printed. A lady
who had learned English in "a school in
Europe. where she was accounted re-
markably proficient in our language,
came to this country to take charge of
an establishment.
Brought face to face with the prac-
teal requirements of every day life her
English proved less comprehensive and
accurate than might have been wished,
and the evidences that her vocabulary
had been painfully collected from die
tionary rather than from living speech
gave good deal of amusement to those
around her. On one occasion she
wished to direct a servant to kill a
chicken and after plucking it to bring
her the feathers. The form which her
directions took was: sDie me that
beast and bring me his vestment."
Perplexing as the servant must have
found this order, his astonishment can
hardly have been equal to that of a
carpenter TO whom was addressed still
more amusing blunder by this lady.
She had an interview with him in
reference to some alterations she
| thought of undertaking in her dwelling,
| but found the estimates he made SO
| large that she determined not to have
the work undertaken. In a short time,
however, she found herself so incom-
NODDED by the state OF the house that
she decided that it would be necessary
to have the alterations made, even al
the figure named by the carpenter. She
accordingly sent for him, and once
more carefully explained what she
wished to have done. To her surprise
the man promptly named a price con
siderably in advance of his previou,
estimate. and his feelings may be i'm
agined when in her CONSERVATION hel
peculiar English betrayed her into say
ing: why, sir, you are dearer TO M
than when we were first engaged
the carpenter appreciated a joke h,
should have scaled down his figures. =
Chicago Journal
Mountain Home bulletin. (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1888-1889, 1888-10-20

$50 you've been fishing this after
noon instead of going to school, hear,
said the old man, as he seated himself
at the table and glanced birch rods at
the boy. '.Never mind, sir, you just
wait until after supper. What have we
got here, wifeP I'm as hungry rs a
wolf' .'Brook trout, pa hastily ex-
planned the boy. Il caught 'em. :"
THAT SOP" said the old man as he
helped himself literally; "bit you
mustn't neglect your educat on, my
dear boy. That will never do, you
know. ."-Epoch.
Mountain Home bulletin. (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1888-1889, 1888-10-20
CARE Or woRk-HoRsEs.
How to Prevent Sore Shoulders and Bar,
and Raw Necks.

How to Prevent Sore Shoulders and Hare
and Raw Necks.
To me there is nothing so painful as
seeing horses with sore shoulders and
necks bare and raw. SO many devices
applied of no avail, pads below and
pads above this raw flesh. Prevention
Is better than cure. and he is the wise
man that adopts the latter, and l am
grieved to say that 1t is only in the
| farming class that we see this torture
To animals; ii is not from overwork,
but negligence, or not knowing how to
prevent it.
Go into any city and you will see
valuable horses in express wagons.
brewers wagons, truckers wagons,
all with housings fittings on
the names, thus protecting the neck
and shoulders from rain, and exclud-
ing the water from between collar and
flesh; drivers should always carry
them. When go into farmers sta
BILE and see such hung up with his
harness. and nose bag to feed his
horses at their work, | mentally OBJ
serve, this man is merciful to his
beast and saves money! The slipshod
one will feed his midday oats from
, basket. or throw it in the bottom OF n
) wagon, and waste more feed in one
year than would pay for dozen nose
!, bags; and the man that does not use
4 housings will make his horses stand in
9 the stable from sore shoulders, losing
as much time as would pay for dozen
y sets of them.
O You may scrape and clean your
Y collars as you will, wash daily with
salt and water or oak bark water, to
d harden the shoulders, you will still
o have sore shoulders and necks; and my
y experience with horses and mules has
l. taught me that any man who wants Ia
make money out Of either, at farming
n or any other work, must keep collar
b. on them every day in the year (work
ing days); those that have them foi
fancy farming can let them bide theil
IT time rs they do other things; Offer
ID these suggestions to those who wish tt
farm for profit. No bank will tax,
II ninety-nine cents for a dollar; yOu
+, look out for the small things, the bis
in ,nes will take care of themselves.
An excellent and cheap remedy, an,
,y can say IA quick and sure healer O
We sore shoulders from neckwear. or an,
ld harness rubbing, is half an ounce @
indigo put into half pint Of alcohol
ne sop this on with u sponge or soft clot
d. three times u day, and this will cur
an and harden. The bottle containing
nd must be kept closely corked after us
as ing or the strength will evaporatt
Avoid all isms. but post up in you
er stable, 'Be mercifu to your beast;
ch this at times will strike the stonie.
ne heart, and he that has such should nc
err own an animal, and particularly shoul
Ter not have the care of any. 1t ma
en- seem strange, but have had men ths
would not eat their dinner when the
lie could not feed their horses. Such, Il
ed fortunately for us all, are scarce
dy In talking over this matter with
cts gentleman, he very sensibly remarke
las why not also provide rubber coats +,
the drivers; then you could work ms
yet and horse in all weathers-a practic
lief suggestion. Gerdld HoWatt. IN COu
t,.y Gentleman
Mountain Home bulletin. (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1888-1889, 1888-10-20
A long letter, in which one dolla

A long letter, in which one dollar
was inclosed. has been received at the
Boston & Albany station restaurant in
Springfield, Mass, from a woman at
Newburyport. The writer explained
that about 1915, while little girl and
travelling with her mother, she took
an orange from the counter which her
mother did not notice in time to return
or pay for, and so the money was sent
to cover interest and principal.
Mountain Home bulletin. (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1888-1889, 1888-10-20

Village Parson (entering country ed
itor's offiee) You promised to publish
that sermon / sent you on Monday, but
| do not find it in the latest issue of your
paper. Editor sent it up. 1t surely
went in. What was the name of iii
Parson My Lambs. Editor (after
searching through the papeO-Ah-
es-um-here it is. You see, we've
got new foreman, and he put it under
the head of agricultural Notes." a
"Hints on the care Of Sheep"
Mountain Home bulletin. (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1888-1889, 1888-10-20

in good faith the sister in Sweden
OF a Swede lying in the Marine Hospit-
al, New York, sent Confederate money
for his return passage The woman
had been swindled.
Mountain Home bulletin. (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1888-1889, 1888-10-20

Edmund Burke once told Garrick
deed" said Garrick, what do you
think, Mr.. Burke, Of bitter cold
weatherp'
Mountain Home bulletin. (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1888-1889, 1888-10-20

in type-writing match at Cincin-
natl the winner wrote 8,709 words in
ninety minutes, an average Of over
ninety-six words per minute.
Mountain Home bulletin. (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1888-1889, 1888-10-20

Are you carrying any Insurance
on your life?n asked the insurance
agent, solemnly. of the stranger he had
casually met upon the train. mo,
sir,'' said the stranger, family, Il am
not. I'm an insurance agent myself.
and there isn't company in the coun-
try that would ever Jake the risk. -
.,oaerUtlie Journal.
Mountain Home bulletin. (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1888-1889, 1888-10-20

Customer Ito jeweler)-"Hera's
the clock | bought of you the other
day. It's of no earthly use to me. for
it gains fully fifteen minutes an hour" :"
Jeweler examining clock k)-.My dear
sir. beg thousand pardons. This is
one of our patent anticipatory time
pieces, made exclusively for our bill
liard-room and livery-stable trade. Ex-
case the mistake. Any thing you may
select in the line of our regular citi-
zen's clock we will exchange 1t for.
With pleasure. ~ Time.
Mountain Home bulletin. (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1888-1889, 1888-10-20
SCARL.ET-FEVER VICTIMS.
Important Statistics Gathered by the Epi
demiOIOgicaI SOcietY of london.

Important Statistics Gathered by the Epi-
Genealogical Society of London.
The relation born by searlet-fever to
the age and sex of the subject as well
as to the season of the year gave rise
TO an interesting discussion in the Epi-
Genealogical Society of London. A
detailed analysis of upwards OF six
housand cases showed that the liabil-
ity to the disease was slight in infan-
cy. reached its maximum in the fourth
or fifth year and diminished every year
afterwards So far as severity of at
tack was concerned, however, it was
greatest during the first two years,
and lessened year by year thereafter.
.Forty-two per cent. OF the cases and
| sixty-tive per cent. of the deaths Oc-
| Cured in the first five years of life. "
The advantage of postponing an attack
was double one, in that liability to it
was diminished each year beyond the
6fth, and also that its severity was les
sened by each year of postponemert.
II was estimated that probably two
thirds of our adult population had es-
capped attack altogether.
The significance of the above is ex-
ceedingly important for the considera-
tion of those, by no means few among
us, who consider lightly the exposure
of their children to diseases that are
considered the inevitable portion OF
childhood. The facts that "a consider
able percentage escape infection alto
gether, and that susceptibility to at
tack and its severity decrease year by
year after the fifth, should stimulate
us to every caution the most intelli-
gent care can exercise to shield our
little ones from this disease. the re-
suits of which, when not fatal, are
often so serious, distressing and per-
manent. Babyhood.
Charlotte messenger. [volume] (Charlotte, Mecklenburg Co., N.C.) 1882-18??, 1888-12-22
Elsctrlcat Pleasure Boats.

Electricity as power to drive small
boats? Why, of course we will soon
have it. and it will be a great deal moro
convenient and pleasant than those hot
steam launches and nasty little petro-
leum boats"
The speaker was prominent New
York electrician. and he talked of the
advantages of electricity over steam and
was very sure that soon yachtsmen who
could not afford large steam yachts
would find electricity much tie better
power to use to propel their boats. He
added The machinery takes up less
room. and then the heat of the furnace
is not felt, because there il no furnace,
and the smoke and grease are also done
away %ith. They are building them in
England. have received particulars of
one that has Just been launched. 1t is
sixty-fye and one-half feet in length.
ten feet in beam, and is designed to
carry eighty passengers at six miles an
hour. The electric machinery and stor-
age cells are placed below the deck, fore
and aft, leaving clear run the whole
length Of the boat for passengers. In the
middle is a handsomely fitted cabin,
with lavatories, dining room, etc. The
electrical energy is converted into mo-
tive power by two motors of seven and
one-half horse power, each driving in
turn threc-bladed propellers. Beats win
soon be made to store electricity and
run just as the street cars do now."-
ilaI anil Express.
Charlotte messenger. [volume] (Charlotte, Mecklenburg Co., N.C.) 1882-18??, 1888-12-22
Hot MIX as a stImuIant.

'sWhat folly it is to drink liquor for
stimulation"
This was the observation of aleading
New York physician.
milk heated to much above 100 de-
grees Fahrenheit loses for a time de-
gree of its sweetness and density. No
one who, fatigued by over exertion OF
body or mind, has ever experienced the
reviving influence of tumbler Of this
beverage, heated as hot as it can be
slipped, will willingly forego resort to
it because of its being rendered some
what less ACCESSIBLE to tle pa'ate The
promptne vita vhiaA ia cordial in
fiucnce is ialt Is ia5eed suspi Ing.
Some porto q s saens 70 be digested
and approprls % almost immediately,
and many who row fancy they need al
coholic stimulants when exhausted by
fatigue will find in this simple draught
an equivalent that will be abundantly
satisfying and far more enduring in its
effects.
"There is many an ignorant. over
worked woman who fancies she could
not keep up without her beer; she mis-
takes its momentary exhilaration for
strength, and applies the whip instead
of nourisument to her poor, exhausted
frame. Any honest, intelligent physician
will tell her that there is more real
strength and nourishment in slice of
bread than in quart of beer; but if she
loves stimulants it would be very use
less piece of Information. 1t is claimed
that some of the lady clerks in our own
city, and those, too, who are employed
in respectable business houses, are in the
habit of ordering ale or beer in the res
raurants. They probably claim that
they are tired, and no one who sees
their faithful devotion to customers all
day will doubt their assertions. But
they should not mistake beer for
blessing or stimulus for strength. A
careful examination of statistics will
prove that men and women who do not
drink can endure more hardships and
more work and live longer than those
less temperate. Mail and Express.