davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11
NOTHING BUT NONSENSE.

civilian" said On Ohio mother, "stop
throwing stones! You might hit q .Presi-
DENTAL candidate.'
HE-"What kind of goods is that dress
made of, Laurar' She-"Camers hair"
He-"Of course; now that you turn around
see the hump"
"HERE, waiter what kind Of pie do YOU
call this!'' ''Apple pie, SIR" "But there
is nothing in it." "Beg pardon, sir, but we
use evaporated apples in all our pies.''
"WHAT was Nero's greatest act of cruel
ty9" asked the teacher Of the class in his
tory. "Playin' the fiddle" was the prompt
response, and the teacher let it 60 at that.
: "WHERE is the island of Cuba situated"
asked school teacher Of q small, rather
forlorn-looking boy. II dunno, sir" "Don't
you know where your sugar comes FRONT"
Yes, sir, we borrows it from our next door
neighbor."
"LEND me your ear minute" remarked
Mrs. Brown to her husband the other even
ing. "Wlu you give it back to met" no in
Quired with mock anxiety: "Of course
will, you idiot! Do you suppose lwant to
start q tanneryl' She got the ear.
A LITTLE girl who does not understand
encores, found fault with the audience at
recent children's concert, IN which she
helped3to sing chorus. "1kno,o we didn't
make one mistake" she exclaimed on the
way home; land yet they made US come out
and sing it all over again!'
MRS. WI have letter from your
Uncle James, Penelope, who wants US to
spend the summer on his farm" Penelope,
dubiously-': Is there any society in the
neighbolhood1" Mrs. W.-"I've heard him
speak Of the Eolsteins and Guernscys. J
presume they are pleasant people,
Miss CANBooE," says Blixem to that in
teresting but rapidly advancing lady Of
forty-four, ~ declare you are looking quits
charmlng-a regular twenty-one bloom an6
spirit You can't be day over that figure
II I'm . judge" Miss Camboge lets OF s
shower Of smiles and says 20" Now, AE
Blixem, you do say such insinuating things
and then you Rueaa ages 20 CLOSELY"
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11
WEST AND 60uTH.


On the Sd Gold Leaf beat the worlds
one mile pacing record for three year-olds
on the Napa (Cal.) track, making 2:l5
The doors of the banking house Of Shank
lin e. Austen, of Trenton, the oldest bank
in Northern Missouri, were closed on the
Sd, owing to the failure of the Traders
Bank, Of Chicago.
THERE was intense excitement again on
the Chicago Board of Trade on the Sd, De-
cember wheat reaching Ellis.
The Virginia State exposition opened at
Richmond on the Sd with twenty thousand
visitors
On the Sd the American Bakers Associ-
alton met In annual session at Cincinnati.
GOVERNOR GORDON and other Democrat
&c State officials of Georgia were re- elected
on the Sd without opposition.
ONthe Sd counterfeit foreign cigar stamps
were discovered in Chicago, and counter
felt bills were also being circulated.
HE Executive Committee Of tire Ameri-
can party on the I'd selected P. d. Wiggin-
ton, Of California, to FIJI the vacancy &C.
casioned by Judge Greer's declination Of
the Vice-Presidential nomination.
H1aHwAYMEN stopped the stage coach
running to Casa-Grande from Florence,
A. T., at Dry Lake on the Sd and stole the
WELSH Fargo treasurebox.
AT st. Louis the National Association OF
Railroad Freight Agents was organized on
the Sd, and L. w. Crawford was elected
president.
On the 4th Mrs. Mary L. Garrett was
sentenced at Medina, O., to hang January
"a, 1889, for numbering two imbecile step
daughters
In Columbus, O.. the American Bee
keepers on the 4th elected DR.. A. B. Ma
son, Of Avondale. O.. Is president Of their
society. IA r.
In the Iowa Woman's Christian Temper
ance Union convention ON the 4th at Des
Moines, Mrs. J. Ellen Foster was reelected
president.
A CANOE capsized on the 4th in tho
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11
PLENTY OF LOGS,
An Abundant Supply Of Raw Material 10
tho Minneapolis Saw-NIilk.

An Abundant Supply Of Raw Material for
tho Minneapolis Saw-NIilb.
The logs were coming fast enough re-
Gently to suit the most exacting millman.
All the pockets at Minneapolis were being
filled up and all the storage capacity was
being used. With one exception all the
mills had an abundant supply, aud none
were fearing famine. Deputy Boom
master Buckley expects that he would get
out of the boom in q short time something
like five hundred million feet of logs. He
than they had ever before dore at this
season, and were taking care of he logs as
fast as he turned them over. Logs were
running in the booms little hster than
they were being turned out by the crew,
which was working ten hours q day.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

A MAN in Trenton, N. j., was recent
ly drowned in beer glass. He had
been drinking hard and was we'll under
alcoholic influence when he entered a
saloon and ordered a glass of beer,
which was brought him. He sat down
ut the table and fell into stupor, his
head dropping forward into the glass
before him. When the barkeeper
tried to arouse him half an hour later
it was found that he was dead, his nose
being immersed in the liquor in such a
way that respiration was completely
stopped. This is the first instance of
the kind on record.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

ALEXANDER CAMPBELL, founder of
the religious sect known as Christians
or Disciples of Christ, was born in
County Antrim, Ireland, September
II. 1888. On recent Sunday many of
his followers in tho United States held
memorial services. The Disciples to-
day stand fifth in numerical strength
alnong the religious bodies in the
United States. They have about $500
churches and not less than zoo, 700
nc,mbers. Their annual increase is
about 50, 900. They have five univer-
tics and nineteen colleges, besides
u schools and seminaries.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

The Odessa Gazette reports the dis
covery of the remains of an ancient
town on the right bank of the Volga.
These remains are traceable over an
area about two miles long by three
quarters of a mile in width. Tho place
has been visited by d deputation from
the Commission OF Archives. A guam
tity OF Arabian, Persian and Tartar
coins has been found there, besides a
multitude of other objects which bear
witness to the cultivated state of the in
habitants. There were remains of
marble blocks, of water courses, and
other suggestive relics.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

DIR. OLIVER WENDELL HOLMES was
seventy-nine years old recently. Once
upon time he wrote: "At thirty we
are trying to cut our names in big let
tiers upon the walls of this tenement
OF life; twenty years later we have
carved it or shut up our jack-knives.
Then we are ready to help others and
care less to hinder any, because no.
body's elbows are in our way.''
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

SEVERAL seasons ago Georgia pro-
duced a large crop of magnetic girls,
but none OF them as rapid in move
ment and lightning changes as the
man down there who was married to
girl one day recently and eloped the
next with an old sweetheart.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

JUSTICE BARTLETT, of the New York
Supreme Court, will never be elected
to Office by the women. He has ruled
that Il husband has an indisputable
right to say who shall and who shall
not enter his house
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11
FROM WASHINGTON.

THERE were 1850 business failures in
the United States during the nine months
ended September 80 last with liabilities of
over 800, OOO, 600, az against 6,S5O failures
and $12S, 100000 of liabilities in the same
period of 1887.
THERE were 211 business failures in the
United States during the seven days ended
ON the 5th, against go the previous seven
days.
The exchanges at twenty.six leading
clearing houses in the United States dur
ing the week ended on the 9th aggre-
gated 81, 2S9, ,695, against $979 695, liza the
previous week. As compared with the COR
responding week of 1857 the increase
amounted to 1879 per cent.
In his report on the 9th the Commission
er of the General Land Office says that
during the past fiscal yoar $3.50, 1911 acres
of land were conveyed or patented from
the Government
On the Baltimore & Ohio road trains COL
lded on tho 9Th near Washington and
three men were killed and FIVE others were
badly injured.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

INSURANCE companies have declared
the Missouri river no longer safe for
navigation, on account of the album
dance of snags that infest its channel.
and will take no further risks upon
boats that ply between its banks.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

SENATOR HoAR has been notified by
the State Department of Massachu-
sets that h discrepancy exists in the
statute governing the Electoral COL
lego; that the law passed in 1887
changed tho time of meeting of the
college from the first Monday in De-
ccmber to the second Monday in jan
uary, but that the section compelling
the messengers to deliver their copies
oil the vote to the President of the
Senate before the first Wednesday in
january was not stricken out nor a
new date fixed.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

The first large steel steamship built
In this country for the merchant serv-
ice was launched the other day from
the ship-yard of William Cramp &
Sons, at Philadelphia. She is named
U11o 11O4uOio and a1sso boo1, o,uot. .vt,,a
for the Clyde Steamship Company.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11
The News Of the Week.
~ TELEGRAPH AND MAIL.
FlFTlETH CONGRESS.

TUESDAY, Oct 2-The bill to aid the
yellow fever sufferers was passed In the
Senate. A resolution was adopted author
izing Mr.. Hsle's Committee on Civil Serv-
leo Reform to continue its sessions during
the recess. A resolution was introduced
requesting the President to negotiate
treaties with the Governments of England
and Mexico for the exclusion Of Chinese
laborers from tho North American CONT
nent and for the prevention Of their en-
trance into the United States. In the
House the Senate bill allowing persons
who have abandoned Or relinquished their
homestead entries to make other entries
was passed.
WEDNESDAY,, Oct ga bill was intro
duced In the Senate providing that the
certificates and lists Of votes for President
and Vice President shall be forwarded to
the Senate after the second Monday in
January on which the electors shall give
their votes. Senator Allison Qa.) reported
q substitute for the Mills Tariff bill, which
be printed. He announced that he would
call up the bill for consideration on the
Sth. Senator Sherman co., in speaking on
the bill said it contained q positive, I'M
questionable reduction Of revenues to
tho extent Of &736Ss,o00; that it
enlarged the free, list by add
ing to it certain articles which could not
be produced in this country and that there
was not q single item in the bill which dis.
eliminated between sections of the coun.
try. In speak ing on the charge that Gov
eminent Officials had been called upon for
campaign contributions Senator Hawley
(Conn.) said that if it was true that Mr.
Cleveland had sent $4,000 to political
committee he had committed crime pun
ishable by fine or by imprisonment or
both. In the House NO business Of i'm
portance was transacted.
THURSDAY, Oct Ain the Senate the
bill relating to the classification of post
Offices and adjusting postmasters' sal
aries was taken up and passed. The
majority and minority reports on the
Tariff bill were submitted and ordered
printed. Adjourned to the Sth. In the
House the time was occupied in discussing
the conference report on the Deficiency
bill, and the report was rejected.
FRIDAY Oct. 3. The Senate was not
in session. In the House q committee
was appointed to investigate the work
done on tho Washington aqueduct tunnl.
The bill appropriating s1s5, $50 for complet-
ing the improvement and dredging Of the
St Clair flats ship canal was reported. At
the evening session twenty seven private
pension bills were passed. Adjourned ia
the Sth
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

In case involving tho attempt
of a loser in grain speculation to
repudiate his orders Judge Oliver
Wendell Holmes, Jr., of the Supreme
Court Of Suffolk County, Mass, has
decided that the reselling of prop
crty before the day OF delivery con-
tracted by the original purchaser is not
prohibited by law and that the specu-
lation was legitimate transaction.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

IT is said that Mrs. Paran Stevens
was recently robbed in Europe of $780,
600 worth of jewels. The Chicago
Journal wonders if the story is gen.
uine, or if it is only a sort of matri-
mOnial bait for a Duke.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

GOVERNOR MoREHoUsE, of Missouri,
has appointed Samuel Levi associate
justice of the county court of Bats
County, vice T. j. Bosworth, deceased
The appointee is Hebrew, and is the
only one of his race ever appointed to
position of any kind by Governor
of Missouri.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11
LATER,

MELVILLE W. FULLER took the oath OF
Office as Chief Justice of the Supreme
Court of the United States, at Washington,
on tbs morning of tho 8th. It was done
quietly and without ostentation.
ALL of the window glass factories of the
country, which have been idle since last
spring resumed work on the 9Th The in
dustry is now under control Of a trust
TIE J. l. Clark wagon factory of Osh-
kosh, Wis, m ,de an assignment on the
85h. Assets 100000 Liabilities $780,
600
AT Knightstown, Ind, on the morning of
the 9Th, dwelling owned by N. B. Wade
and occupied by Mrs Sarah Haggins, his
mother, and Mrs Martha Gates was discov-
cred to be on fire. An entrance was forced
and Wade was found by the bed of his
mother unconscious He was taken out
but died in q few moments. His mother
was dead when found Mra Gates was
not found until she had been severely
burned and she died soon after. A knife
covered with blood and bottle of Paris
green was taken from Wade's pocket in
~eAS~eSAA16
ders and then suicided.
THE carriage team OF D. J. Spaulding at
Black River Falls, Wis, on the 9Th, became
frightened and ran away: They jumped
upon dray and knocked Mr. Barclay. the
owner OF 1njuring him internally:
Two incendiary fires occurred at Waterloo
Iowa. on the night of the 7th John Young
lost 3 horses, other stock, ice, tools, hay
and grain. W. W. Fisher and Elmer Hos
totter lost store, house and furnitura
Total value, $4,000
The steam barge D. NJ Foster was dis
covered ON the 9Th, near Port Hope. Mich
coating bottom up No signs OF, the crew
was visible and it is thought they have
been taken Of
An attempt was made on the 9Th to assas-
sinate W. H. Edmonds, editor of the Hot
Blast of Admission, Ala J. D. Lawrence
called at the Office and asked the editor to
retract certain statementa Upon being
refused he pulled q revolver and shot Ed.
monds in the arm and then shot John Con.
pell, the mailing clerk in the neck, and
Mr.. Tripney in the head.
THE property Of the New York Daily Star
was attached BY the sheriff on the 9Th, for
= SIT, 900 paper debt
FIFTEEN railroad laborers at Palisade
Oak, are dangerously sick with typhoid
fever: The fever is epidemic ut that point
The strike of the street car drivers ct
Chicago still continues Cars are run ocoa-
sionally under police protection.
FuTY new cases Of yellow fever at Jack
sonvills. Fla, on the 9Th Total cases
3,2O6; total deaths, 200
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

BARrH, an early traveller, relates
that he "caused crowd of savages to
fee in terror by playing an ACCORDION"
Human nature seems to be the same
the world over.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11
A Brutal Assault.

A brutal and murderous assault occurred
in Minneapolis the other evening The
would-be murderer escaped and had not
been heard from. Stephen d. Moore, bet
ter known to the old settlers OF Mnneapo-
lis as ''Old Steve" attacked John McElhat-
ton. an old real-estate man, with d Jack
knife, cutting him on the le1t cneel, the
left shoulder and on the breast in close
proximity to the heart The cuts were all
serious, but were not believed to oe fatal.
The trouble arose over a chattel mortgage
which Mr.. Mobilization held on MDre's ef-
fects
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11
Illinois Lyochers Indicted.

NATION, ILL.,, Oct 8-Nine indictments
were returned by the special grand jury q
Charleston Saturday, which was callei
August to investigate the William Moort
lynching. Three men who reside in Thu
city have been placed under heavy bonds
two ct least are known to have skipret
while others have not yet been appre
hended.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

FELIX CAMPBELL is the only plumb
or in either House of Congress-. His
check is said to be good for $500, 000-
the sum on which plumbers usually re-
tire from business.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

CASTLES are evidently not in great
demand nowadays. Devices Castle,
one of the most unique in England,
representing IN outlay Of nearly f100,-
600, was recently sold for f8,OO0.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11
A Distressing Accident.

Arthur Forbes, q boiler maker at st.
Paul, and employed at the Milwaukee
shops, met with peculiar aud distressing
accident the other afternoon. He was
working on a boiler, when q silver of iron
an inch long and about one-eighth of an
inch in thickness scaled off and lew into
his left eye, penetrating the bone behind
the eye. He was taken to st. Barnabas
Hospital, and Dr. Airport, after careful
examination, removed what was left of
the eye, it being found necessary to do
this in order to save the right eve.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

A FOREIGN gentleman, giving his
name as Waddlecletz Jphanetzky,
tried to kill himself at Boston. The
reporters are sorry he didn't do it In
the old country.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11
MINNESOTA STATE NEWS.
MONEY FOR SCHOOLS.

fho Amount to bo Dlsbursed .Will Reach
Over HaH Million Dollars.
State Superintendent Kiehle has COM
pleted the semi-annual apportionment for
the schools Of the State. The total amount
TO be disbursed IL t565, 21542 The total
number Of pupils in the State IL 212, 487.
The table by counties is ~ follows, show.
ing the number Of pupils each and the
amount received: S.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11
In Memory of q Brave Girl.

LOUISVILLE, KY, Oct. s.-A monument
to the memory of Jennie Bowman, the girl
who was murdered by Albert Turner and
William Patterson, both colored, in April,
1887, was unvailed here Saturday. Miss
Bowman was q domestic and was attacked
by the negroes in an attempt to rob her
employers house, situated in. fashion
able and densely populated part of the
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

The manufacturer of Rough on
Rats" has failed, and is offering five
cents on the dollar IN settlement. That
is trough on creditors"
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11
YALE COLLEGE has over three hum
dred freshmen and number that are
daily getting ''fresh.' -

The summer resorts have all closed
and the tired guests have come home
to enjoy little rest and solid comfort.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

E. j. GAY, of Louisiana, is the rich
est Southern member of Congress. He
made his money as sugar planter,
and is said to be worth $40, 600, 900.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11

THOMAS A. EDISON, the inventor,
says that the germs of yellow fever car.
be destroyed by the use of gasoline and
caustic soda.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11
rho Prtco of -Four Again Advance

WATERLOO, Ia, Oct. 6.-The millert
have again advanced the price Of hou,
twenty cents per 100, making an advance
of one dollar per 100 in month. The
price Of -four is higher tn an it has beer
for seven years, andsa further advanced Il
axnactad.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11
Colored BIasons to Build q Temple.

KANSAS CITY, Mo, Oct s-The National
Grand Lodge of Colored Masons have ap.
propriated soc, 600 for the erection of q
temple at Kansas City. Kansas City was
also selected as the National headquarters
and the National insurance scheme was
Adnnfa6
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11
Sioux Cfty's Corn Palace Closed.

Sioux City's Corn Palace Closed.
SIOUX CITY, Ia, Oct. s.-The corn-palace
festival closed Saturday evening after a
successful run of two weeks, during which
large number of strangers waited the
city. There will be another corn palace
NEXT YEAR
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1888-10-11
Cotton and Tobacco Badly Damaged.

Cotton and TOBACCO Badly Damaged.
RALEIGH, N. c., Oct. a-Full information
from all the tobacco growing sections OF
this State make it apparent that the dam
age done by the recent frost is fully Is per
cent Of the whole tobacco crop. The dam
age to cotton by excessive rains and frosts
seems to be about 20 per cent. of the crop.