New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1888-05-26
WFrNS AND ODDITIES.

WINS AND ODDITIES
Some wives prove such that their husbandS
would gladly lay them Up In Heaven"
some old maids are particular how they travel
They like a smack at sea- and land want good brs
s,,,nge that the woman who never can remember her
own aoe can tell you In twnkling that Of all her female
friends.
man with winning way ought to make successful
gambler.
peope with social longngs who move into new neigh
horboods and find their neghbors do Tot notice them,
should BUY big hound and tic him in the cellar over
night. - 49,.
The partridge is tmid bird but it always dies game
Dc Lesseps wants to make an orphan OF America
vvhan he's done this Continent will have Panorama
Railway conductors there's nothing goes faseF than
womas,s tongue when on the rail-
Tbe,e Is Prohbitionist In this town 20 strict that
though he is becoming bald he won't use stmuant for
his hair.
davs ON the Harlem goatlots
vo,, never saw saltcellar walk watch your grocer
One way to make thin child fat is to throw him out
Of a window. He'll probably como down-plump'
The boa constructor might be put on the list Of great
contractors 80. ala ..o,s. with
Whist players are iona Oh "ipihs Wv 'N ~ vs.
a new rubber . 49,
snakes are becoming common 10 used to 90
ortrino Even Wall Street brokers see snakes"
By the way did the snaebts victim Gore see 'ne Snn.
over in weehawken before he took the whisKeyi OF u
ho t,ra the whiskey before he the snakeF
Eek. Alderman Jaehne, Of Sing sing Prisoh thnhs ~ "
ran,s duty TO improve condition. hence he Is trying
TO get but OF Sing Sing 1t was what ne du 70 ihp'
his financial condition that got MN n0' oins Sins
And now the Chinese claim the invention Of the bicycle.
Certainly Tennyson maze some feieieHs' " w.
Cathay years ago. - ,.,u.
One by one illusions cherished for centuries are De,s
rudely dspeed. pamphlet is just out proving may
Queen Ezabeths generals did not send her news OIL '
defsat Armada by the cpher message San'
Never Give indscrlminate aims to blind tramp. Ten
10 one he would be glad to see you hanged
How 10 beat carpets without getting hot-use matng-
1t beats carpets for GOODNESS.
,a us,cuIes was strong enough doubt, to lift the
corner OF house. What would he think OF the modern
| shoplifter7
7. f. suggested that in the physical tests applied to
uouIdhe policemen well developed collar" bone should
| be Indispensable
Children often complain that the alphabet is dull sub
| ,ect But who has not seen poke or SHOVE L. ana
! N urge E.
A Miss Brown entered Fifthave. 'bus yesterday sha
had remarkably bright hook Che end OF her umbrella
II caught Joness eye. lie is better now, thank you
sinoular-,sn,t ttY-that while there are five new
Methodist Bishops there only Newman among tss
number.
Thursday was redletter DAY with the presbytenans
in Philadelphia. There was no painting the town red
however.
The Methodist Bishops pretty good natured set Of
| men, Since the election on "Wednesday they VIII ia
| Joyce more than ever,
The fifty members Methodist Conference WAC goo
ana vote each on the ballot for Bishops are enpa
rassed by the suspicion that they may have voted i0f
themselves.
II ia said that a Nevada has invented railroad
frog that won't disturb sleeper by eroaklng' "hs'
blessing It would DO IL no would invent something I"
keep sleepers from snoring
The canoes Of makers are more comfor'ao'e "'
those Of others The most uncomfortable to get into are
the volcanoes
One way of bringing about surf reform iaAe n0''
care Of your grass plot this summer M
Scandal mongers believe in the cash SYSTEM INV
give credit 10 any one. ,, .,,
Unsuccessful novelists envy the rattesnaAe- aiis '
always makes noise In the world D u.s.