Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-03-31
DR. LAFFrRrY's ApnREss.

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DIR. LAFFERrY's ADDRESS.
DR.. Lafferty came to the front and
said lie had been commissioned by the
medical students to present to certain
members of the faculty two gold
mounted canes. He was puzzled to
knowth the eternal fitness las the theolO-
eians would say Of giving a walking
stick to a physician. What had IT to
do with the "Travels of Doctor of
Physic ?" Ialluding to Coroner Taylor
book.
We all know the city doctor don't
walk. lie rides-rides IN fine equi-
page, the axles oiled by the adipose tis-
sue Of the purses Of his patients.
Laughter
He thought there was lurking gentle
satire in the gift rs well as generous SEN
timent. Perhaps the recipients had
rheumatism. The young men have
gone far enough in the medical volumes
to find that sahcine and cOlchicum are
called curatives for that mslady, but in
fact stout cane was a valuable prescrip-
ton to "assist Nature He had recent
" tried the medicines, but preferred the
cane.
AS the merry boys had opened the
door for humor, he would join in the
sport at the expense of the grave Galens
around him.
The Greeks annually gave their Helots
day TO unburden their minds and
abuse their masters. and then the slaves
returned to their bitter seryitude and TO
silence.
The doctors VIII presently have us IN
der the yoke let rs use our liberty and
tongue now.
BIBLICAL W.T.
The only place in the Bible, said DR..
Laflerty, where there is evidence Of hu-
NOR is in two illusions TO doctors Of
medicine. One Is where the woman
diseased for eighteen years spent al her
living, "sufl'cred many things Of the
doctors and grew worse. In the Chroni-
Giles there is a subtle, subcutaneous in
lection Of wit in the serious narrative {:
Asa was diseased IN his feet until his
disease was exceeding great, yet he
sought not to the Lord, bat to the ply
sicisns. And Asa slept with his fathers
and died. Great laughter.
Lord Halifax wittily said men are
saved in the other world by faith, and IN
this world by want OF it. Lack of faith
in medicinal poisons is growing. DR..
Lafcrty eaid he recalled the old-time
dose-the sitting by big saucer sop
ping molasses and wormseed. Laugh
ter. Now a speck of powder was the
remedy. They gave thimbleful-a
buck load OF calomel now, "paryules. "
Hom@opathy-the Doctor paused and
remarked he was on dangerous ground
there laughter microscopic and mus
tard-seed pills-had benefited the race.
1t probably could not knock the pen
feather out of the brood wing Of pes
thence like cholera, but it had taught us
men would get we'll if let alone.
BREAD PILLS.
DR.. LafIerty conjured, in pleasant
tone, the young doctors to put faith III
bread pills. Laughter They might
not know at first what was the matter
with their patients, and bread plIls were
safe. When they were older and did
know. then they would have sense enough
to continue the same daughter
He begged pardon for these seemingly
acidulous words. They. however, have
a place ut this feast. There is so much
of compliment and sweetness on these oc-
casions of mutual praise that we get our
fingers glued and disagreeable from
clincing candies and conserves. We
need at last fnger-bowl with a scrap Of
lemon TO make us comfortable.
He closed by saying; - am charged
with the pleasant office of presenting to
DIR. James and DR.. Shields these canes
from the students Of the Medical Col
lege." Applause.
DR.. James is member OF the fauculty
and Dr. Shields Of the adjunct faculty.
PRIZE.
After few "sweet remarks by the