The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-03-03
Written for The Arkdnsaw TraUeter. AN EXPERIENCE WITH A
 METAPHYSICIAN.
BY CALVIN.

For many long and weary years (most years are long and weary to a nervous prostrationisD, l suffered with whole army of aches, pains and distresses of various sorts. went to this, that and the other doctor for a label to put on my afllictions, and finally the M. D.'s formed themselves into a committee of the whole and agreed to tie up all my aches and dis tresses into one bundle, and label it "Nervous Prostration." Forsooth, from that day became nervous prostra- tionist, and remained so until-but l will not anticipate.
 travelled hither, thither and yon with my bundle of nervous prostra- tion. tried to drown it in baths hot and baths cold, but like the cat of tra- dition, it would not drown. l tried to melt it in the heat of the Turkish bath and to freeze it in the cold pack, but it was proof against melting and freezing. had my bundle of nervous prostration kneaded, nodded, rubbed, pinched and oiled, C ia Weir Mitch ell, but it still remained not Ca thing of beauty and joy forever"
 In this state of body and with a deadly despair in my heart, returned to my "native heath," country vil- lage in Vermont, there to end my days as retired prostrationist.
 When it became known that I had returned in the role of ner- vous prostrationist, was be- sieged with callers, principally old ladies, good old souls, who had never seen a nervous prostration- ist and who were curious as to how such creature would look and act. in fours, and would muse upon my case and interrogate me somewhat in this fashion: "Do ye relish your victuals middlin' well?" "Do ye sleep we'll nights?" "La me! It does beat all what queer disease this nervous prostratin' is. Massaful man! Long back years ago, when we were young, no one never heerd of no such disease Folks had gallopin' consumption, de- clines an shakin' palsy, but no one was sich like ye be, kind O constitu- tionally tired like and sort O disagree able in general. Pears like doctors, when they don't know what else to say to sick folks, they tell lem they've got narvous prostratin'."
 Thus would they rsmble on in their garrulous fashion, but the monotony was varied when one of the good old souls told me her daughter 'Lizy had ck f,.Ov pnofAn and yhfIa ch a was down there she learned the mind cure. Would let 'Lizy treat me? To be sure I would; nothing would please me better.
 The next day 'Lizy was ushered in, and moments glance showed her to be tall, graceful, comedy brunette of some twenty summers or SO. Black ringlets coquetted around her brow, and one, more audacious than the rest, caressingly entwined itself around her she'll pink ear.
 'Lizy told me that all need do was to sit in silence and think of nothing in general and particular. This com- mand, seemingly 80 easy to follow, proved very difficult to obey, for directly in front of me sat 'Lizy, with her shell-pink ear, in direct line with my vision, and seeing the little ear, utterly failed to think of noth- ing in general and particular, for try as I would, could not help thinking how different life would be if could always have the little pink ear as the guiding star at my hearthstone-but I am mixing my metaphors and di- gressing.
 I sat for fifteen minutes in silence, the while my healer tried by the power of silent thought to displace my belief in sickness and sorrow with the truth that there is no sin, sickness or sorrow on this terrestrial ball, only as they exist in ones mortal mind. At the end of fifteen minutes my healer aros, smiled upon me and told me I was better.
 felt delicacy about introducing the question of money to creature whose theories were 60 immaterial and spiritual, but I summoned cour- age to ask: "What do I owe you2"
 "Two dollars" replied my healer, with the faintest of blushes on her soft cheek.
 .,.19e next day she came again, and again l tried to think of nothing in