davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
CHEAP WISDOM ON TAP.


"When things are at their worst
they're sure to mend"-because it's not
till then that any one makes the SUI
preme effort
"You must cut your coat according to
your cloth'-but you'll wear it accord
ing to your income and education.
"POYerty is 10 sin''-but it's ID
uncomfortable.
elf you throw mud enough some of
it's sure to stick'-but it's only black
when it's wet. When it gets dry it turns
white or gray and is easily brushed off.
tsThe early bird catches the worm''-
but if he gets up before it's light he
often swallows stick by mistake, and
then he doesn't confess to any one what
a bad tummy ache he's got, but swears
it was a worm.
GA bird in the hand is worth two in
the bush"-that is, unless you happen
to be the bush.
"Punctuality is the thief of time,"
and ''ProcraStination is the soul OF bus
mess"
conversation is the last resource of
people who have nothing to say"
zone swallow makes a summer
you're in a snow country.
Its long lane that has no turning"
but life is made up of long lanes, and
if one falls down and dies before one
reaches it, the turning amt much good
to one
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
The Ladies Objected.

Boston Herald.
One night during the past winter a
company of ladies and gentlemen of::the
colored persuasion had a sleigh ride in
town not very far from Boston, wind
ing up with a dance in small hall,
which had no provision for ventilation.
As the weather was very cold, the jani-
tor built big fire in the stove, and by
the time the dancing began the hall was
like an oven. The dusky maidens and
their escorts danced vigorously and
waxed warm, and SO did the hall. When
the driver of the sleigh, son of Erin,
after stabling his horses, looked in to
see the fun, the air was so close that he
found it uncomfortable, and he resolved
to make very short stay. Just as he
had made up his mind toretire and seek
fresher and cooler air, one of the floor
managers, after consulting with his as
sociates, came up to him, made pro-
found bow, and said: Excuse me. sab,
but l must ask you to step outside. De
ladies Offices to de smell OBJ de stable"
He stepped.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22

to which the performer hangs, head
down, as he presses his feet to the board
above him when starting upon his walk.
Underneath is stretched large net.
An ordinary pair OF stage shoes will
answer the purpose. To the bottom of
these are fastened circular, concave
arrangements of gum, sort of bowl
shaped shoes, about six and one-half
inches in diameter, and it is these,
pressed against the board above, that
hold the walker suspended.
{ The material of which these bowl
shaped shoes are made is of the same
thickness and appearance as that used
in heavy firemen's hose. In the center,
thick piece of steel, circular in form.
To this plate is riveted on the convex
side of the shoes a small iron frame
work. From this framework extends
two iron rods, shaped like the handles
of the instrument used in tOaSting or
brOiling. By the framework the bowl
T shaped shoes are fastened to the regular
walking shoes. The rods referred to
extend toward the toe, resting under
meath the ball of the foot. A pressure
exerted upon that portion of the foot
/ will press out the rods and permit the
air to rush into the cOncave gum shoes
just at their center.
Every thing in readiness the per-
former sits upon the trapeZ and adjusts
the concave arrangement to his shoes.
Then he swings around, head down.
holding OH to the trapez, and presses
the bowl-shaped arrangements on his
shoes against the board above. AS he
presses the air is driven out of the
bowl. A vacuum is created as the gum
is pressed all the tighter against the
board, becoming flattened out. The
atmospheric pressure on each of the
shoes used will exert power or carry
weight of about fifteen pounds to the
square inch. Then the trapeze is let go
of. The performer hangs suspended.
A pressure upon the ball of the left foot
operates the iron rod which opens a
small arrangement at the convex center
of the concave shoes. Air rushes in and
the shoe becomes lOOsened. Hanging
by the right foot the one lOosened is
thrown further along on the board.
!. Tightly it is pressed against the board
until it fastens. Then the left is oper-
ated in the same manner. and so it con-
tinues until the stage is crossed.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22

floor of the stage, their full form ex-
tending downward. Until recently the
manner of performing the feat was
guarded secret. While there is gen
eral difference as to details, the prin-
ciple involved in keeping the walker
suspended is practically the same. 1t
is the secret of the ability of the fly to
walk over ceiling. The board used is
a heavy plank aaout fifteen feet long
and three feet wide. This is rendered
almost perfectly smooth by being rubbed
down with pumice stone. Near each end
of the board is suspended a trapeze
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
Following Instructions.

New York Sun.
"Now, James," said the grocer to the
new boy, "our stock is first class in
every respect; there are no flies on it,
and never will be, and you mustn't hest
tate to crack it up to customers"
Then James, profoundly impressed,
went to wait on an old lady, who pres
emily went out without buying.
"What did she want, JameS?" in
Quired the grocer.
"She asked me if we had any fy-paper
l could recommend, an said yes-that
there was no flies on our fiy-paper, an
never would be-"
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
A JOLLY GOOD FELLOW.

He was quite jolly fellow,
And witty Pulchinello
If particularly mellow
With some wine.
He was good at billiard playing.
And his cultured nerve in staying
AT hotel without paying,
Was divine.
He was excellent in baking
Tailor's duns. and fond of talking,
Boating, fencing, boxing, walking,
All the day;
While the way he picked the places
OF the winners in the races,
Left score of mourning faces
Far away.
Tt was whispered he was stealthy,
Wooing girls considered wealthy;
For his nerve was very healthy,
AS said
With affected words of sorrow,
And a vow to pay tomorrow,
He could charm you, and could borrow
Every red.
Flunked. at last. he took to working
For q living, firmly Sinking
All his former comrades, Sinking
At his brace. :.
And persisted i'll his folly,
Till shade of melancholy
Settled on his former jolly
Little face,
DE Witt Sterry in Puck.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
A MELANGE.

A Boston beauty who wintered in
Rome, now alludes 3sthetlcally to the
cuspidory.-Puck.
Elfrida wants to know "How many
people read the best books?" Not over
200, my dear. At least that is all the
publisher sold of mine. But, of course,
perhaps the publisher lied. There may
be perhaps as many as $50, but no more
than that.-Burdette.
''Papa, how old was Methusaleh when
he did," ''Nine hundred and sixty-nine
years, Rollo." ''And what was his bust
ness?' 'Boy preacher. "-Burdette.
Fashion in pocketbooks is not so es-
sential as money in p0cketbooks.-
Washington Crictic.
The Chicago B. B. c. will have an
Indian mascot this season. 1t is time to
give the American a chance.-Puck.
One of the sights of Pennsylvania
anthracite WaShingtOn Critic.
The boy playing marbles StOops to
conquer.-Puck.
The rose that blooms on the window
sill and thrills with delight in the pen
sive gaze Althea Belinda, ought to con-
graduate itself on its rare good flower
pot luck.-Puck.
The birds are singing in the trees,
And all the world is glad;
The roses blush in every breeze
Oh, where is your liver pad?
Washington Critic.
A crank is all right if he turns in the
right Observation-Disclosures Call.
The crank: is the most obstinate Of
men. When he takes az thing in his
head. you cannot turn him.-Bost0n
Courier.
Hamlet is a play for all time. 1t
will never give up the ghOSt.-Puck.
A Dry Diseourse-A temperance lee
ture.-Puck.
Most women believe in cohesive at
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. Critic.
A pair O. docs-Two physicians
Texas Colonel.
The more illegible physicians pre-
scription is written the worse the medi-
cine taSteS.-Hotel Mail.
1t is when you are about to take it
that you give the. DOCTORS prescription
1.-THE shake" -Boston Courier.
ArcOla physicians do not ride in cut
tiers. They are afraid they will be ac-
cused of sleighing (slaying. )-Arcola
Record.
You often hear of doctors giving a
man up, but it is not until he is too
weak to reach his pocketbook. Yonkers
Statesman.
By following the directions of the
ministers you get to heaven, and by fol-
lowing the directions of the doctor you
save time.-Merchant Traveller.
When the cold-blooded fraud has an
axe to grind he finds a crank ready to
help him.-New Orleans Picayune.
The man who unfinchingly and I'M
varyingly tells the Truth is sure to be
called a crank.-Saratoga Eagle. How
few cranks there are in our populous
ountry.-WaterlOo Observer.
Having studied the subject with great
care for some time, we have at last come
to the conclusion that the only way to
discourage cranks is to let them have
their own way for while.-Burlington
Free Press.
Geese flying north is sign of spring.
Your inability to shed or mOult your
ulster is anOther.-Puck.
A hand to hand contest-poker.-
Washington Critic.
Thought you said this train stopped
here twenty minutes for refreshments"
growled a cross passenger $50 It
does" said the brakeman, ''but they
ain't no refreshments and never 8 been
any. Don't blame the train; it stops all
right. Blaze her out of the refresh
mentS. "-Burdette.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
A Great Pair.
AN OLD PROBLEM SOLVED.

When Adam delved and Eve span,
Who was then the gentleman?
old Proverb.
When Adam delved and Eve span,
Why, Adam was the gentleman,
For we can readily believe
That when he delved he delved for Eve,
Assumed the hardest of the toll,
With willing hands turned up the soil,
Trained all the vines and pruned the trees,
Thus leaving Eve to spin at ease.
If Eve had delved while Adam span,
He would have been no gentleman.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
Wanted a Short Lease.

JUUSe.
Crushed Tragedian-I see you adver-
tise houses to rent.
Real Estate Dealer-Yes, sir; can we
do anything for you?
Crushed Tragedian-I hope so. You
see / am going to open my season at the
Twenty-tirst Avenue theater tomorrow
night. and | thought if you could fur
nish me house of about $500 people
I'd like to rent it for two hours and a
half. No go? Well, here are two comps
for the show. Distribute them judi
ciously.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
A FATAL DEFECT.
NO WONDER 1T WAS A FAILURE

NJ WONDER WAS A FAlLOhEs
Was at The Dashes' reception.
And was it successful. you say?
Why, didn't you know, my dear fellow,
1t failed in the most dismal way?
Yes, guess they had all the best people
Ono meets about town everywhere;
But the fault was OF too great nature
For even this fact to repair.
The hostess? of course she is charming.
And handsome, and witty, and bright,
And the cntree of her house is welcomed
BY all with the greatest delight.
Her family is one of the oldest
That graees the city to-day,
And even the worst scandal-mOngers
'Gainst her conduct have nothing to say.
But you can't understand, this considered,
Why it proved such horrible funk?
Well, you know, the fact is, my good fellow
There Wasnta single man drunk.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
The British Ahead of Us.

FUCK.
''The British are ahead of us in one
respect" said the general, after warm
argument with an Anglophobiac on the
respective merits of England and
America.
Sin what, shonld like to know!" de-
manded the Anglophobiac, incredu-
ously.
"Time." replied the general, sit is Z
o'clock in London when it is only r.
here.n ~
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
A Poor Measure.

Washington Critic.
In the National Republican Office:
Managing Edit0r-I want a good
strong editorial on the Republican pres
idential situation.
Writing Editor-Yes, sir. How long
shall it be?
Managing Editor-Well, say you
make it Cullom and half.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
Catching Up.

Snooks-You needn't poke any more
more fun at the Mail and Express,
Brooks. It's pretty nearly up to time
now.
Brooks-Eh? Has it got down to the
deluge?
Snooks-Stuff! (reading) "April 4,
1888. William Henry Harrison, ninth
president of the United States, died at
Washington, ID. c., this day forty-seven
years ago"
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
Poker In Williamsburg.

Young Dolby Gas it comes his turn to
talk)-Pm out, gentlemen,
Looker-On-Why, man alive! What
are you thinking about? You've got
four aces!
Young Dolby-I know; but if any
body should happen to hold royal flush
I'd have to walk clear out to East New
York, and lost my SHOES on the last
deal.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22

Lilly-Why in the world do you des-
troy your tout ensemble by carrying
that ridiculous red fan?
Millie-Well, you see, dear, that hor-
rid Jack Rushit will persist in telling
those delightfully."- risque nothings, and
it helps one wonderfully to blush, you
know.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
Judicious Criticism.

Artist-That, sir, is my latest produc-
ton; "Sunset on the Shenandoah"
Studio Lounger-Sunset, eh?
lArtist-Yes; merely pot-boiler.
Studio Lounger-Pot-boiler HIM, l
should Judge it would not only boil the
pot, but call out the entire fire depart
ment.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22

Lazy Actor-What marvellous energy
youput into that smothering scene, dear
boy-can't think how you do it.
Energetic Actor-Easy enough, old
man. | only have to imagine that my
wife is under the bolster.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
A Great Saving.
Puck.

Mrs. Griggs-Then you don't have to
rely on the barometer to find out when
there is going to be storm?
Mrs. Briggs-Oh, dear, no. Grand
fathers rheumatic leg is just splendid.
l don't know what we'd do without
grandfather.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
NOBODY ASKED HIM.

'sWhere are you going, my pretty maide?"
"Fm going milking, sir" she saide.
what is your fortune, my pretty nader
"a millions my fortune, SIR. she saide.
'Then | want to marry you, my pretty
made"
'Well nobody axed you, sir" she saide.
WASHINGTON Critic.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
He Was Very Young.
Tid-RitS.

TNu-b1IS.
Mrs. Newtie-I wish you would light
your cigarette on the sidewalk instead
of in the hall, Tom.
Mr. Newtie--Do you dislike the Odor?
Mrs. Newtie-Oh, no, my dear, but [
want people to see that you have learned
to smoke.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
Justifable Pride.
New York Sun

New YORK Sun.
Brown-You are looking bright and
happy this morning, Dumley.
Dumley-Yes; m out of debt at last.
Every bill owed was outlawed yester-
day. l tell'you, Brown, a man feels like
man when he is square with the world.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
THE WRONG YEAR.

They sat beside the bright log fire,
And watched the flaming embers dart;
While Love, the rogue, another pyre
Did kindle i'll his heart.
And as the parting moments drew,
1t seemed SO like a leave of life,
He mustered courage and did sue
That she would be his wife.
But with little thoughtful pause.
Mid bushes of the deepest pink,
She answered: Not this year-because-
You ksiow " hal FOLKS wo;lld think!
Life.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
Wasnt't Going to Supper

Puck.
Brown-What have you got in the
bottle, Robinson?
Robinson-Ether. .OJ
Brown-What are go going to do with
ether? e
Robinson-That big duffer Jones has
threatened to whip me on sight; and as
soon as | see him coming Pm gong to
take it. [ don't propose to suffer i'll
can help it. -
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
A MARTIAL TRAGEDY.

The groom was slender New York youth,
dude Ct some renown;
The briGe Tpl bold Chicago belle,
The pride OF that gay town.
They started we'll on their honeymoon;
but while 't'was yet quite new,
He tried her wild and unnamed ways
Oucc 70. I'll 10 Subdte-
-
No more Oh earth will he enjoy renown,
For she, in outraged pride, put her foot
--doWD."
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
A Healthy Boy,
Washington Critic.

washington Crltlc.
In Society Circles:
''Did your son take the valedictory in
college?" said gentleman to a lady
who was enthusiastically praising the
ability of her offspring.
mo, indeed, he didn't" she replied,
with pride. HE didn't take anything.
He is the healthiest boy you ever saw"
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
Knew the Business.

Epoch.
Teacher Ito Tommy, whose father is a
milkman)-Tommy, how many pints
make quart?
Tommy-A quart of what?
Observation-Disclosures, for in
stance.
Tommy-Two pints; one pint of
water and one pint of milk.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
In the Wrong Business.

Epoch.
Customer Ito barber)-How is bust
ness. Hans?
Barber "a Brooklynite)-Dot pizness
vas pad, very pad. Mine brudder vas a
butcher and he meks lots of money. l
drinks would do veil as a butcher.
Customer (wincing)-Yes, Hans. [
think you would make tirst-class
butcher.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
She Forgavc Him.

Boston Courier.
Wife-What do you mean by coming
home at this time of night, George?
Husband-'S all your fault. my dear
hic-'S all your fault!
Wife with dark frown)-All my
fault, sir. All my fault?
Husband-Yes. F'lers wanted me to
stay longer. Wouldn't do it. Said a
man with wife's pretty IN amiable IS
mine had no s'cuse for staying out any
longer. That's reason why er l came
home so soon.
Wife (smiling)-Well, you're a great
trial to me. George, but l suppose I'll
have to forgive YOU"
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22

much of a figure
Accepted Suitor-Oh, not so bad-5
and nine cipherS-and all her own, too.
~
Lilly-Why in the world do you des-
troy your tout ensemble by carrying
that ridiculous red fan?
Millie--Well. you see, dear, that hor-
rid Jack Rushit will persist in telling
those delightfully."- riSque nothings, and
it helps one wonderfully to blush, you
know.
Lazy Actor-What marvellous energy
you put into that SmOthering scene, dear
boy-can't think how you do it.
man. | only have to imagine that my
wife is under the bolster.
Constancc-Did lie tell you thate
Why, Clara, ! don't see how you could
have listened to him.
Clara-Well, you know, dear, he said
it in French.
Constance-oh. that's different.
S.*
Gay Johnnie Rather is seen turning
into Delmonico's at p. m, with his
terribly sedate wife on his arm.
Capt. Grantley-Hello, there's Rat
tier actually ct h;l going into Dels with that
Mrs. Carbohydrates what one calls
dragging ones anchor. isn't it Jack?
X \
Mrs. Younglove is perfectly devoted
to her husband. Do you know, she
walks down the avenue every afternoon
to meet him!"
THAT is not devotion, my dear, as you
will see when everybody has seen her
Easter rig"
At Old Point Comfort.
"What, Lottie, you come here with
out your husband?"
"Why not? My doctor has ordered
me absolute rest.
Host to late guest:
81 am delighted to see you. ] hope
you will enjoy yourself. My only re-
greet is that the most popular people
haven't come. Truth.
~
Prince Bismarck is now feeling glorious,
Ger all the ills of life Nictorias.
Washington Critic.
We have hope
Which is yetunspoken
To-Wit: that Win
Ter's backbone is broken.
Washington Critic.
~
Two friends meet.
No. (wshing to be exceedingly po-
lite Hello, Jaekl How's your honor
this EVENING""
No. 3 mistaking his meaning)-"Well,
really. my dear boy, can't say. Go ask
my e."-Truth.
Atlantic City is so full of cats that
Flobert rifle goes with every back room.
Puck.
Futile business small retail hat
ters.-Puck.
A Broadway Theater: First Friend
What are you crying about-this scene
isn't affecting.
Second Friend-No, but l am crying
when | think of the money gave up for
my ticlset.-Trnth.
Doctor Ito butcher patient)-Your
liver is out of order.
Butcher-You lie; it's the best for 10
cents pound in the city.
Kicks the doctor out and RECEIVERS.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
Politeness at Monte Carlo.

POIitenesS at Monte Carlo.
Omaha World.
Porter Cat Monte Carlo)-Don't stop
here, sir; take the first door to the
right.
Guest-This is public withdrawing
room, why shouldn't l stay here if l
wish?
81 see by your face, sir, that you have
been heavy loser tonight?
Eyes, lost ALL"
81 thought so. This way, please.
The door to the right opens on the gar
den path leading to the suicide grotto.
Good evening""
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22

picture of horse and wagon on his
slate. "What does 1t represent, Eddie?"
ga peddler selling bananas, sir" re-
piled the boy.
''Where is the man, Eddie?"
so, he has just gone into house to
see if they want to buy any,"
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22

T1d-B1tS.
Chairman of Church Sociable Execu-
tive Committee-Everything has gone
nicely so far, and now Pm going down
town to order the
Public-Spirited Deacon (from back
seat)-Never mind; I'll contribute that.
Chairman-That what?
DeacOn-That oyster.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
Evolution of a Driver.

Omaha World.
Citizen-I'm surprised to find that you
have become such careful driver,
Jake. You used to be the most reck-
less teamster on the streets. You ran
into half dozen different carriages to
my certain knowledge.
Teamster-Pm drivin' a mighty light
wagon now, an it's me own.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
Not at All Necessary.
His Answer Ready.

"That is very good" said a school
master TO all urchin, who had drawn a
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
ADakota Definition.

From Tom Holmes in Oakland Herald.
Dakota school teacher-Johnny what
is strait?
Johnny--It's one of them things that
knocks fellow silly when he hain't got
better'n three of kind.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22

Smith, was sorry to hear, Brown,
that you had failed in business.
Brownies, l struggled hard, but l
lost everything save my honor, thank
God. and the property | was wise
enough to settle on my wife when |
found myself getting into trouble.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22

M'dear -m'dear, don't as me-been
(hic) readin' club-been readin'. What's
Bacon says? 'Readin' makes full
mann-(hic) been readin' t'much,
m'dear.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22

Walking II e al dOWn
along the full length of
a great board and who
are known as ceiling
walkers. There are lady
and gentlemen perform
ers, their performances
being confined almost
entirely to the variety
stage. The eff e ct is
startling as one of them
moves along underneath
the hoard far ahova tho
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1888-04-22
mitcracy on the Increase.

Nebraska State Journal.
"What is the percentage of iliiteracy
in Nebraska"
81 don't know, but it is rapidly on
the increase"
''HoW do you make that out?"
swell, take the Smith family, for
instance. A year ago they were all
educated persons. Now 80 per cent of
them cannot read OF write"
81 can't see how that can be-"
"Why, Mrs. Smith had twins last
week"