The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1888-07-19
MISCELLANEOUS.

The difference between horse races
and walking matches seems to be that
in the former the contestants score be-
fore they start, while in the latter they
must start before they can score.-Idea.
A New York woman recently APP
peared at the theater wearing blue
waistcoat, with gold dollars for buttons.
1t is said that she did not appear tf
mind the sensation she created.
The Oakland Tribune recommends
keeping a goose in the chicken-roost
as a guard against the depredations OF
professional chicken-thieves. The goose
will "squawk' on the intruder every
time.
The Sweetwater dam just COM
pleted at San Diego, Cal, at a cost OF
$500. 900, is said to be twenty feet higher
than any dam in the United States. II
il ninety feet from its base to its crest.
Yeas" said young Mr.. Sissy,
sucking the head of his cane, I'm an
Anglomaniac; but only in a mild form.
Y knaw." yes" she responded. by
way of keeping UP the conversation.
''sort of an Anglolunatic, as 1t were.
Mr. Sissy"
"A farmer in Gratiot County, Michi.
gan. plowed UP a fifty-pound cannon
ball the other day. There is no record
of any battle having been fought in
that vicinity, and the people are
wondering where the big cannon ball
came from.
brunswick. Ga, has invested in q
new fifty cent Bible for swearing wit
hesses on. The reason for this is thai
the old Bible has had the first four
chapters of Genesis kissed away, and
the lawyers are in doubt whether an
oath made on Bible minus its first
four chapters is binding.
The woman who welcomes bright
weather on Monday on account Of
changing out clothes to dry" is greater
than the woman who takes advantage
of til. same bright weather to 60 shop
ping. This is rather clumsily expressed.
but we've got the wisdom in as usual
brakes Magazine.
THE laughter of girls" says De
Quincy, is, and ever was, among the
most delightful sounds on earth. "
Judgment on that. 1t depends whether
the girls are laughing at your best joke,
or because you have just taken header
from your bicycle. and are trying to
think which end of yourself to pick up
first.
A Dallas County CTexas) preache,
has issued circulars declaring himself
to be the Waterman spoken of in the
twenty-third chapter of Ezekiel. Among
other assertions, he alleges his ability
to prove that the Bible shuts out all I'M
married persons over twenty-one years
of age from the kingdom of heaven un.
less good excuse can be shown.
Scatter ashes along the rows of the
young strawberry plants as soon as
they shall be large enough to work.
Stir the earth, take out all grass and
then apply the ashes on the surface,
and the rains will carry them down tc
the roots. Fertilizers for Strawberries
give the best results when applied neal
the surface and not worked into the
soil, as the roots feed near the surface
instead of penetrating deeply.
-"Have you seen papa's new dog
Carlo" she asked, as they sat in thu
parlor. YES" he replied uneasily
II have had the pleasure of meeting
the dog" isn't he splendid? He il
so affectionate. II noticed he wa
very demonstrative," returned he. a
he moved uneasily in his chair. ''He i
very playful. too. Inever saw NOR.
playful animal in all my life." II an
glad to hear you say that" "WhyT
because I was little bit afraid tina
when he bit that piece out of me tn
other evening, he was in earnest. Blu
If he was only in play of course it's al
right. can take fun as well as any
body Singapore Review.
"A fisherman, while on Plymouth
beach one day, captured large gra
sea gull in a rather peculiar predica
ment. Firmly pinched upon the bird
bill was sea clam about the size Q
the palm of mans hand. The clan
weighed enough to keep the head @
the gull hanging downward, and thu
effectively prevented any long flight
while it was evidently nearly exhauste
in trying to escape from its strange CAP
tor. 1t is thought that the gull, seem
the CLAIMS snout protruding, Ell
deavored to seize the dainty morse
and was in turn gripped by the har
,, shell of its intended victim.
There is turning point in the Low
!. of wife for husband which shout
J be carefully watched. In some it occur
very early, long before thirty. especial
If the match were one of impulse c
family convenience; but in the majorit
, of instances its appearance manifest
itself about the approach to the middl
? age of women, from thirty-five to forty
g two. There is revulsion in the who
moral and mental being-a kind {
chilling, cold indifference, which ii
rt;ohtact pnE;pdpoea m, thu pa ~ >f ~