davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-03-15

Boston Courier.
Ir's ENGLISH.
Ttinerant yender-'Ere's s yer nice fraish
'ot wafles, Railways hinwigoratin' han
comfortin:
Miss Anglos-Oh, Trem! do let's stop
and listen little. I haven't heard such
pure English since We left Lunnon.
--Jud1e.
A SUGGESTION.
seBv George !" exclaimed Wagstatf,
with chuckle, as he looked his cards
over. 81 don't believe could improve on
this hand
"Perhaps you have never tried soap
on it." suggested Buckhorn.-Ch1eag0
Tribune.
CURIOUS EVOLUTION.
First Omaha Man-Has Swearhead
got religionl
Second Omaha Man--Not that know
of.
Every strange. He never swears any
more. he don't chew tobacco except on the
sly, he wears clean shirt, changes his
collar every morning, has put on cuffs,
and when he talks his voice is as soft as
a woman's."
eyes, I've noticed that His private
secretary is sick and he is getting along
temporarily with pretty girl type
writer"
THE BOY.
Little Nellie-Ma, is the baby very
sick?
Mother-Not very, Nellie.
''He isn't likely to die, is he?"
ooh, no; you wouldn't like your little
brother to die, would you2"
"Well, n-no, ma with Just tinge of
hesitationl, / wouldn't like him to die, of
course; but still; ma, when Willie Waf-
hes's little brother died he didn't have to
go to school for whole week. . Texas
S!ftings.
HE ACCEPTED.
"Leap year is q great snap, isn't it2"
remarked Snobbins.
"Just why?" queried Smith.
ga girl proposed to me last night"
'No; you don't say?"
eyes; and accepted"
"Worse and more of it. How did ii
happen3"
'Simplest thing in the world. She
proposed to me to leave the house OF
She would call her father, and I left.
That was all. - Washington Critic.
SHE'LL BE THERE.
Omaha Husband-My dear, do you
know it is the fashion now to have big
clock at the head of the stairs!
Wife-Yes, l know; but ours is not go
ing there.
"Why not2"
ga clock at that point is not necessary
When you come home late I'll always be
at the head of the stairs to tell you wha
time it is"
A REMARK.
The car had just stopped at the Priests
of Pallas Hall, and large, genial faced
jovial kind of man assisted a lady t.
alight. AS the car started again h'
rather earnestly remarked:
"Now there goes my wife to hear San
Jones tell her of her faults. Then
after an impressive pause: yet when
try to tell her of them there is terrible
racket. I can't understand women. :
Kansas city Times.
AN EPICURE.
Small Boy tnear the window Of restau
rant)-Test smell dat soup, Jimmy
| Hain't dat finel
Jimmy (holding his nose)-I amt
smellin' no soup terday, it 'ud spile me
appetite fer de roas' chicking.-LJe.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-03-15
StOrmier When She Came

One stormy night about four months
ago little girl came into family up
town where there was already boy 3 or
years old. One bad evening this week
the father and mother were going out
and the boy wanted to go along and
take the baby. TO this the mother OBJ
iccted strenuously, and for final argu-
ment she said:
''But, my son, don't you know we
can't take little sister out such stormy
night rs this?''
"Well, don't care, he replied 'It
was good deal stormier than this the
night she come here - Washington
Critic.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-03-15

Miss Patterson was telling the little
Indian boys about the late blizzard at
the West, and how well the Indians had
weathered it. One of the little fellows,
who had been listening to her attentive
ly. drew himself up and grunted back:
"Can't kill Indian, white man die easy" "
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-03-15

1t is interesting to trace the evolution
of words and expressions. Cultured
people say chow do you do3" Those
who are less precise say "howdy do"
In the backwoods of Tennessee they say
"howdv?" The noble red man of the
West saws chow" While the cat on the
fence says "owr
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-03-15

A bank robber brought to justice tried
to exonererate himself by saying that he was
a reporter and his business was that of taking
notes"
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-03-15

NV hair is turning grey too fast and am admon-
ished i'm many ways that cannot stand as much pres
sure as could 20 years ago. Sound judgment die
tates that close some of the many branches OF busi-
ness which have tried for many years to carry on,
and have decided to the cuttng-oH process
by closing out my stock of Stoves at least so FAR re-
ducing it that some young man with moderate means
can step i'm and buy the balance and continue the bsl-
ness.
IweII understand that to do this will require
large Sacrifice but as compared with health any sac
rifce large is small. shall therefore COM
mence
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-03-15
THE HoNEYMooN's wANE.

''My darling George" it used tobe,
When weddod life was new.
His title now is Chin and ''he,"
And sometimes ''Say, there, you.
-BOStOn Courier.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-03-15

IN thr rilit foot gets left.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-03-15
Thursday, Oct. 8,
18 = 2.


COST, some of them MUCH LESS, but every one, with
out reserve, at less.
know how little such offers too often mean In
advertisements so let me put myself so squarely on
record that there can be mistake about my meaning
Here Is My Guaranty in
Square English, viz:
EXCEPTING FOR SECONDHAND STOVES. WHICH,
BEING TAKEN IN EXCHANGE, REALLY CAN
HAVE NO CERTAIN OR DEFINITE COST,
GUARANTEE THAT EVERY STOVE IN MY
STOCK SHALL BE OFFERED AT LESS THAN
THE SAME ACTUALLY COST ME IN CASH.
WITH EVERY DISCOUNT DEDUCTED.
umy reputation for meaning what I say counts
for anything with the people Of LamoIe County, and
hope it does pledge that reputation over my sigma
ture that my above offer shall be cOnscentiOusly and
faithfully lived up to until further notice until
close out this branch Ofmy business.
Remember this offer is for cash only shall ask
profit if give tme but will make low prices even
when time is given My line of Second Hand Stoves
will be closed out at surprisingly low prices.
thrust may be favored with numerous calls from
nv old friends for until this stock is closed out we
can certainly make for your interest to buy come
and come quickly, and will do you good.
The pubIic's most Obedient servant,
Carroll 5, Pace,
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-03-15

Miss Patterson was telling the little
Indian boys about the late blizzard at
the West, and how we'll the Indians had
weathercd it. One of the little fellows,
who had been listening to her attentive
ly, drew himself " and grunted back:
Cant kill Indian, white man die easy.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1888-03-15

HYDE PARK. VT. Oct. 9Th, 1887.
, 1888-04-19

The Americans are the quickest people
in the world to adapt themselves to new
situations. The western people travel
much, at home and abroad, and they do
not require n very long experience to know
what is in bad taste. They are as quick
as anybody believe they gave us the
phrase-to "catch on" to quietness and a
low tone. Indeed, l don't know but they
dued style, they can beat the world. The
revolution which has gone ali over the
country since the exposition of 1876 in
house furnishing and decoration is quite
as apparent at the west as in the east.
The west has not suffered more than
the east from eccentricities of architecture
in the past twenty years. Violations of
good taste are pretty well distributed, but
of new houses the proportion of hand-
some, solid, good structures is as large in
the west as in the east, and in the cities l
think the west has the advantage in
variety. 1t must be frankly said that if
the easterner is surprised at the size, cost
and palatial character of many of their
residences, he is not less surprised by the
refinement and good taste of their in
teriors. There are cases where money is
too evident, where the splendor has been
ordered, but there are plenty of other
cases where individual taste is apparent,
and love of harmony and beauty. What
1 am trying to say is nat the east under
values the real refinement of living going
along with the admitted cost and luxury
in the west.-Charles Dudley Warner
in Harper's Magazine.
, 1888-04-19

There is a large New England element
in the social economy of Brooklyn, and it
is responsible for many innovations that
for nine days disturb the conservatism of
the city beyond the East river. One of
the latest fads is the electric kiss, which
originated in Boston, and was introduced
here by n young lady who had attended
an ante-Lenten party On Beacon Hill. 1t
is thus described by a young lady partici-
pant:
''The ladies and gentlemen range them
selves about the room. This being leap
year the lady selects n partner, and to-
gether they shuttle about on the carpet
until they are charged with electricity,
the lights in the room having first been
turned low. Then they kiss in the dark,
and make the sparks fly for the amuse-
ment of the onlookers. oh, the shock is
delightful. / nave never been but to one
electric party, but 1 understand that after
a young lady has played the game for a
while it is impossible to give her a shock.
Probably the gentleman don't shuttle his
feet hard enough on the carpet. Graciousl
I'm afraid l shotld wear the soles off my
Shoes
The electric kissing parties are growing
rapidly in popularity, in spite of this be-
ing leap year.-New York Evening Sun.
, 1888-04-19

Angular handwriting is the rage. Like
@stheticism, mackintoshes, herring bone
plaids, white spots, and forbidding re
serve, it is an English importation, and
peculiarly feminine. In the tight little
island, the girls take to stub pens, blank
note paper, and a flowing angularity of
writing, as readily as the 'Daisy Millers"
to gum and slang. The letters seem to
blow into curves which, before they can
be analysed, are finished at start and
close with n funny little hinge joint, the
unraveling and reknotting of which is
the secret of the writing. Knowing it to
be the universal style in English and Ca
madam society, the college girls of the
enst manage to acquire something which
is anti Spencerian, and hardly semi-demi
English.-Chicago Inter Ocean.
, 1888-04-19

This startling announcement was sue
cecded by another, made by n small boy
pcrched in one of the windows:
Thar comes Pete Kane on his black
boss, with Kitty Abel a-holding' onto
him"
In vain the sheriff called for order.
Abel and his two sons went out followed
by spectators, lawyers, judges and jury
men, and at last by the sheriff himself,
who wanted to see the fight as much rs
the rest.
Peter Kane had ridden up to the porch
Of the village ~''store," dismounted, teth-
cred his horse, and assisted Kitty to alight
before old Abel and his two %strapping
boys reached the spot. Every one was
excited except Peter, who was quite cool
and uumovGd. There WAS to be a fight,
beyond doubt, and every one prepared to
take sides in the ''scrimmage," according
to his procliviUies. The two Abel boys
''~shucked" their hunting shirts in readi-
ness.
''Stan' back thar. boys" said old Abel,
seizing an AK handle from n pile that stood
on the porch, cor I'll lay yc out with this
ax helve. This is my beezness, not yourn.
Pete Kane, we amt satisfied with gwine
10 law with me, but you've run away with
my dahtcr, u~nbeknownst. Air you two
married2'
eS, litneT. SHlu Ine DluSDlnB hlLIys
''Thar nuvver was a Abel married to {.
Kane that she wasn't disowned of her
kin, " said the old man. ''The Kanes an
Abells has fit through three generations.
It's been n scandelyous beezness, in my
Judgment. You kin take yer Judgment
agin me for the bar, for l broke hunters
law in that, an acted ruther mean"-
''Yer welcome to the bar, Clarke
Ahcll, " said Kane. 81 don't want the
money, nohow. It's John Adams fool
cry
John Adam was right" returned
Abel, an III pay. But, Kitty, gal,
why didn't you let me know the purl you
you was in, an how Peter saved you? l
only lurned it today. o mout have
been dead but for him. Why didn't you
AK for the gal like u man, Peter Kaneg'
The young folks stammered their re-
grets.
'.Jcems Abell,' cried the old man to
his eldest son, don't stan thar glowerin',
but Jest go into the store and get n quart
of the best, an then ride with black Betty
ahead to Kane's. The boys'n give you
100 yards law. The. fight atween the
Kancs and Abells is busted. Buss me,
Kitty. gal. L away with yer mother
myself"
OF went James Abel on horseback,
with his black bottle of whisky, followed
by hastily mounted hOrsemen, the fore
most to the privilege of bussing ''black
Betty" the whisky bottle, an old Irish
custom still kept up in the section.
.'There was n bounteous ''infare" at
the ~b-idegroom's house, and a good time.
The only thing to MAJ it was the prospect
of a fight between James Abel and an
Overton Kane, but the old man Abel APP
penred with a hickory CAD, and persuaded
the two to stop.
The trial never was really concluded,
but Peter Kane went over next morning,
and was clOseted with the county clerk.
The record bears the following:
VS.. Detinue. Damages, $4,000.
Abel.
Suit withdrawn by plaintiff, who pays
costs.-Thomas Dawn English in The In
dpupndpnt.
, 1888-04-19
THE STOVE IN THE VILLAGE STORE.

When the twilight had deepened to darkness
They gathered from far and near.
Old farmers who plodded the distance
As pilgrims their shrines to revere;
AT the shabby old store at the corners
They met and they entered the door,
For the mecca Of all these old CrOnies
Was the stove in the old village store.
1t was ~guIltless of beauty or polish,
And its door was mskillfully hung,
But they made n glad circle around It,
And the genial warmth lOosencd each tongue;
And they talked Of the crops and the weather.
Twin subjects to gossip most dear,
And the smoke from their pipes, as it blended
Gave a tinge to the whole atmosphere.
Full many the tales they related,
And wondrOus the yarns that they spun,
And doubtful the facts that they stated, =
And harmless the wit and the fun;
But If ever discussion grew heated
II was all without tumult or din,
And they gave their respectful attention
When n customer Glanced TO come in.
When the evening was spent and the hour
For the time of their parting had come,
They raped from their pipes the warm ashes,
And reluctantly started for home;
Agreeing 10 meet on the morrow
When the day, with its labors, was DER,
For the mecca of all the old cronies
Was the stove in the old village store.
Mrs. T.. a. Treat.
, 1888-04-19

The ORIGINAL ABIETINE ONT
MENT is only put up in large two. ounce
tin boxes, and is an absolute cure for old
sores, burns, wounds, chapped hands and
all skin eruptions. Will positively cure all
kinds OF piles. Ask for the ORIGINAL
ABIETINE OINTMENT. Sold by DR..
w. N. Hunt, at 25 cents per box-hy mail
30 cents.
, 1888-04-19
That Tired Feeling

Aflicts nearly every one in the spring.
The system having become accustomed to
the bracing air of winter, is weakened by
the warm days of the changing season
and readily yields to attacks of disease.
Hoods Sarsaparilla is Just the medicine
needed. 1t tones and builds up every
part of the body, and also expels all
impurities from the blood. Try it this
season.
, 1888-04-19
.ssSt rccPiUcd, u sIesC Tine
Of EOyS' and ChIGreH'S
salts, also kiH suits at
~. .W0rA;S'

ACEgQNsG, Blood Elixir is the only
sS~SN - Blood Remedy Euaran-
toed. It is a positive curef for Ulcers, Erup.
tons or Syphilitic Poisoning. ItpuriRsstho
whole system, and ban ishes all Rheumatic
and Neuralgit Pains. We guarantee it.
DR.. ". N. Hunt.
, 1888-04-19

The largest stock of fine brandies. old
whiskies, choice Rqueurs and superfne
cigars at George Masten's well known
house, corner Sixteenth and Ferguson
ktrnptS
, 1888-04-19
N0N'N

NON>N trile with any Throat or
oN Lung Disease. If you have
q Cough or Cold, or the children are
threatened with Croupo or Whooping Cough.
use Acker's English Remedy and proven
further trouble. 1t is a positive cure
and We guarantee it. Price 10 aud 50c
DR.. w, N,
, 1888-04-19

Wedding and visiting cards IL great
variety at the Leader Office,
, 1888-04-19

% ROOKLNN Addition.
- beautifully located out on
ColfaN; lots SX1a, only 5000.
Morris q Cashier. 1850 Lawrence
, 1888-04-19
Dr.. Vagaer&Co.
sPECIABEaTs

We offer no npology for devoting 50 much time
and attention to this much neglected class OF
diseases, believing that no condition OF human
ity Is too wretchcd to merit the ympathy and
best services of the profession to which we he
long, rs many are innocent sufferers, and that
10 relieving the afflicted and saving
them from worse than death, is no less II
h~llnntkIuphis and "A bencnctor TO his race
Than the surgeon or physician wholly close mp
plication eNcels IN any other branch of his pro
irssion. And. fortnnnfeIy orbumnuity the day
s J"yTning yrhpn ihe ais biantbrGri,H tiayt
condemned the victims of folly or crime, like
the lepers under the Jewish law to die unc1red
Tor, has passed away.
YOUNG MEN
Whomay besunering from the effects of youth
full foilies or indiscretIons, Will do well to avail
themselves of this the greatest boon ever laid
mt the alter Of suffering humanity. DIR. VAC
NER will guarantee TO forfeit five hundred dol
lars for every case of seminal weakness or prt
Vate disease of any kind or character which he
undertakes and fails to cure.
MIDDLE7AGED MEN.
There are many men of the age Of 20 to 60 who
are troubled with too frequent excavations OF
the bladder often accompanied by a slight
smnrting or burning sensation and n weaken
ing of the system in a manner the patient can
not account for. on examining the urinary de-
pOsits n rupy sediment Will often be found, and
sometimes small particles of albumCn will mp
penr, or the color will be of kin or milkish
hue, again changing 10 "A dark and turbid mp
pearance. There nrc many men who die OF
this difficulty ignorant of the causc, which is
the second stage of seminal weakness. Dr.
Wagner win guarantee IA cure in all such
eases and n healthy restoration of the gcuito-
urinary organ. Consultation free. Thorough
examination and advice. 500.
See the Doctors additional advertisement In
the Daily Denver News and Tribune-liepubii
can.
An communication should be addressed
DIR. WAGNER & 60.
III Larimere street. Address, Box 27Si, Den
Yer, Colorado.
Cut this out and take along
, 1888-04-19

EFF & ADDENBROOKE,
- Manufacture Jewellers
Room 8jh Tabor Block.
Prompt attention TO mail orders,
, 1888-04-19

Legal blanks at The Leader office.
, 1888-04-19
DENVER DIRECTORY :=: 81 5$:;:: = !: :; : $::; !: : 4; :;: &:

SASACcuRATELY
~ nttCd by mail
PROF.. FORD ptician,
1921 Sixteenth ST, Denver, Colo.
The Durham recorder. [volume] (Durham, N.C.) 1879-19??, 1888-10-03
Grand Rally.

Don't forget thegrand Democrat
ic rally in Durham
Thursday night next.
Hon. A. NJ. Waddell, Cleveland
elector, aud
Geo. W.. Sanderlln, candidate for
State Auditor,
Will address the people.
Let the people of Durham and the
surrounding country rally in strong
force to hear these able expounders
of true Democracy.
1t will be worth coming many
miles to hear them.
The Durham recorder. [volume] (Durham, N.C.) 1879-19??, 1888-10-03
slot Under the Collar"

Tut, tut, gentlemen, the prople are
sick of such scenes. In the Senate
Thursday was a partisan debate in
which the bloody shirt was brought
to the front. Mr.. Chambers reso-
luton to investigate the recent cleo
tions in Louisiana stirred up the mat
ter and brought out a burst Of ora
tory from both sides Of the Senate.
MIR. Gibson defended his State and
Mr.. Chandler replied in uncompli-
meatary terms, defending thecharges
of fraud and bribery made in his re-
solution. Senator Edmunds took a
hand at this point and made some
sarcastic comments on Mr.. Gibson's
defense. The debate then became
general and the whole question Of
Southern outrages and negro suf-
frage came up. Messrs. Chandler,
Blair, Spooner, Reagan and Coke
took prominent part AMI the lat
ter became so personal m his re-
marks that he was ordered to sit
down. He afterwards apologized.
Mr.. Coke then intimated that he had
letters in his possession which coup
led Mr.. Spooner with the greatest
and most cruel eviction of the age
This stirred up Mr.. Spooner to a
savage reply, in which the allega-
lions were denied and he, in effect,
challenged MIR. Coke to repeat the
words outside of the Senate chamber.
Finally the matter was dropped and
the Senate adjourned until Monday
to cool off.
The Durham recorder. [volume] (Durham, N.C.) 1879-19??, 1888-10-03

has for some years been growing
worse in Pennsylvania and better in
Great Britain?
Why ''in the very occupations
which we so tax ourselves to protect
the English workman has, as rule
the advantage -
The Durham recorder. [volume] (Durham, N.C.) 1879-19??, 1888-10-03

The Raleigh Signal, Republican
organ, has been endeavoring so long
to twist the British lions tail that it
has become a twisting twister from
Twistersyille. While reading the
RECORDER a few days ago, it evident
ly felt in twisting mood, and hay-
ing on pair Of highly colored green
goggles, twisted one Of our editori-
ais, comparing the policy of the Re
publican party with that of the
Democrats, into meaning "perma-
nent British taxation" Could any
thing be more absurd? None are
so blind as those who will not SCI"
The Signals policy seems to be very
much on the order Of one Of its de-
parted leaders-Col. Ike, Young
Lie like HI, and stick 10 it." We
shall not attempt to follow the
Signal through its rambling and
double twisted deductions in regard
to our words and meaning, but copy
its closing paragraph:
"Goy. Vance says that IL the In
ternal revenue is abolished, the tariff
will bring in all the needed revenue.
Then abolish the internal revenue,
say the Republicans. This is the
American system Of taxation. No
let US have a permanent and per-
petual internal revenue and a Free
Trade tariff in the interests Of Eng
land. This Is the British system.
So says the DURHAM RECORDER very
truthfully and correctly, and that Is
the Democratic plan"
The RECORDER said no such thing.
Here is what the RECORDER did say:
"Arethe capitalists Of this country
the men who live upon the profits,
the toll Of the poor able TO take
care of themselves without taxing
the labor they rob upon the neces-
saries Of lifeE
The capitalists Of Free Trade Eng
land are.
The Democratic party says give
labor and the poor thenecessaries Of
life free from taxation.
The Republican party says labor
and the poor may have whiskey, to-
bacco and olemargarine free, but
that they must be taxed upon the
necessaries Of life for the protection
Of capital invested in monopolies and
trusts"
The Signal is welcome TO all Of
the British system and free trade
tariff il can make out Of it. The
Democratic policy i. 10 reduce the
tariff on certain articles and admit,
free of duty, certain other articles
Of raw material, and the Mills bill
reduces the revenue, while the Re.
putlicans maintain that the neces.
saries Of life must be taxed in order
that monopolies and trust may b
protected, and laborers are thrown
a littlesop in the way Of free whisky,
tobacco and olemargarine, while
the articles they are compelled 20
use il highly protected and taxed.
The Signal cuts some very ludici.
Gus capers In It's efforts TO draw !
comparison between American snd
foreign countries.