The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1888-03-27
BRIGHT BITS.

RATHER-The backbone of winter may be
broken. but the tail still continues to wriggle.
-Ttd- Bats.
WISH for myself a very long life-only that l
may be able to die of love for you often and
long. F7fe9ende Blatter.
SEVEN PER CENT. Of the liquor made in this
country is used in the arts most of it in shear
ing sheep. San Francisco Alta.
EASTER soNNETs are to match the gowns that
90 With them. If they only match the pocket
books that get them the men wouldn't gruInble.
-CLeUe!dnd sun.
IL A GRAVEYARD in America stands a tomb
stone with the following inscription; Here will
lie NIT James Jones; at present he still lives and
carries on his shoe store at $50 Franklin street"
-bfiegeHde Btatter.
THE winter of 1885, -Ss will go laundering down
the ages as one of the meanest in the memory
OF mankind. The pusillanimous attack it made
yesterday upon young men whose arrangements
to hook their listers were on the point of CON
summation beggars all powers of nvective.-
Buffalo Courier.
TIE MOVEMENTS OF MEN-"Well, well" re-
marked Mrs. rown. I've noticed this about
until after midnight, and when we are wives,
they don come in until after midnight. ! sup
pose it is the law of compensation, and | don't
complain. "-Detroh Free Press.
MAGISTRATE 10 prisoner(-You say, Uncle
Rastus. that You took the ham because you are
}
yet | understand that you have four dogs about
the house
Uncle Rastus-Yes sab, but wuddent arsk
my family to eat dogs yo' honah Sun.
DRY GOODS CLERK Ito lady looking at mourn
ing goods THAT is an excellent piece of goods,
madam.
Lady-Win it do up nicey9
Clerk-Oh yes, madam. ! sold some of that
crepe to Mrs. Smith several years ago, and to-
dav she is wearing it for her third husband
It'd Bits.
WRITER in household journal says that
worry Leads men to murder. suicide, embezze-
ment, insanity, drink. family arrangements
quarrels and business difficulties" This is pref
ty bad, but it might be worse. We should be
thankful that worry doesn't lead men to write
spring poetry or attempt to play Hamlet. -
NOrT'tstolC1l Herald.
LITTLE STUART had spent his first day at
school What did you learn?" was his auntie's
question.
Didn't learn anything"
We'll what did you dOy"
Didn't do anything. There was a woman
wanting to know how to spell cat, and after
she bothered some time told Exchange
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES Ito mistress)-I
don care To have you go out in this weather in
that dress.
Mistress--well, declared What, is it your
business what dress wear when go out?
Servant beg pardon, but you promised to
give me that dress when you are through with
it; SO CUES I've got something to say about it.
Texas StftingS.
In a few weeks, the papers will be much more
interesting to the man who is weighed down
with business cares during the day. He can
then read that 'F'lpkins got his base on ba lis
went to second on SINNERS tumble of Bonny's
hot one, and took third on Stubbn's wild
rhrow-n of Munchs fly to left only to die at the
plate on splendid double play off Sinnicks
grounder to Mehatfy to Snagby. "-NorristolO
Herald
THE editor of a Griggs county Dakota) paper
calls attention to the fact that Griggs county
cont aims room enough to seat the entire popli-
latiOn of the globe in arm-chairs within its lin
its allowing each person space of thirteen
feet. Unless the Griggs county editor can offer
come other inducement. it is extremely doubt
full if the entire population of the globe will 90
there to sit in arm-chairs. 1t is too internally
sold in Dakota to take such an out-of doors
loaf during the winter and too hot for comfort
in the summer.-NOrriStOrn Herald.
CAB, JOHN said a loving young wife," it
seems like tempting providence for you to get
your life insured almost as if you were prepar-
ing for death. you know" and she cried q little
on the collar of his new coat.
"Don'J be foolish little one" he gently re-
monsrated; ''if should be called suddenly you
would have $4,000 to keep the wolf from the
door
Ten thousand, Johne' she said, with a con-
vulsive sob; Il thought you were to get it in
sured for SO, 000N'-NetC York sun.