The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1888-07-19
A BARBER'S REVENGE
He Gets a Rival in His Chair and Makes 3
Woeful Sight of Him.

The most fashionable barber shop
on Fifth street is located at No. 4, says
the San Francisco Examiner.
The most dashing artist connected
with the establishment is Bernard
Wineberg. The Mazeppa which adorns
the forehead of the handsome barber
is an object lesson in high art.
In addition to his distinguished
beauty Barney is said to be one of the
cleverest razor and scissor wiSlders in
the business, When not occupied with
customers inside the shop the propri-
etor permits Barney to advertise the
business by decorating the doorway.
While thus located he has enjoyed the
smiles of many admiring lady pedes-
trians.
He was constantly on the watch for
a young damsel whom he had met at
the synagogue but once, but that once
was sufficient to keep her image con-
stantly fresh in his mind. Several
days since what was his amaZement
and chagrin to see the very maiden,
for sight of whom his soul was long
ing, pass him without even a nod, in
the company of bearded gentleman,
whose confidential conversation she
was evidently heartily enjoying.
Rage filled the heart of the jealous
Barney, nor did the lapse of several
days quench the angry fire that burned
in the tonsorial chest.
Last evening as Barney was chew
ing the cud of sweet and bitter fancy,
who should enter his shop door but his
hated rival, who removed his coat and
seated himself comfortably in the chair
usually occupied by Barney's patients.
The poor barber was so thunder
struck for a moment that he could
scarcely draw his breath, but as his
wits returned he took up his custom
airy position behind the chair and in
quired sarcastically, as he gazed upon
the handsome beard of his rival:
''Do you wish to get shafet?"
mo, | don't wish to get shafet," was
the reply; ''but wish my beard and
hair trimmed, and well trimmed, too,
do you understand"
81 fix you all right, mine frent."
And as he reached for the shears the
fiendish grin on his countenance hap
pened to take in the bootbIack, who
was seated half-asleep on the floor,
and turned him yellow with fright.
The operation was soon completed,
the cloth removed, the shears replaced,
and the patient approached the mirror
to see the result of the operation.
At the first glance he stood SPELL
bound, and it was some time before he
could find breath to exclaim: ''Great
Scott, what kind of a racket is this?
Am drunk or crazy?"
And well might he be astonished,
for it is safe to say that never before
or since has a human poll been de-
prived of its natural covering in such
a ridiculous manner.
A typographical map of a country
after violent earthquake would give
no idea of the state of affairs. A tuft
left in one spot. and right next it the
hair removed entirely, so that the scalp
glistened in bald patches. The beard
was also treated in a similar way.
As soon as the disfigured man could
catch his breath he demanded of the
barber what he meant by his action,
and received the reply that if didn't
like.it he could visit hades as soon as
practicable.
Then he went for Barney
At the first smash lie sent one OF
Bamey's teeth on Il tour of inspection
of Barney's stomach with his right,
and landed his left Immediately after
on Barney's conk, causing the tonso.
rial blood to besmear the immaculate
whiteness of his apron with a rapidity
as though it had been sent through a
garden hose.
Barney couldn't fight and SO he
clinched.
In his antagonists endeavor to break
away he somehow got his thumb into
Barney's mouth, and Mr.. Wineberg
closed On it.
At tlis juncture the other artists
present started to take hand in the
melee, when suddenly four hundred
pounds of guardian of the peace in
two sections, each six feet in height,
were launched upon the scene.
Order was comparatively restored
and the combatants taken to the South
ern station, where the patient gave the
name of Charles Foster and deposited
$50 for his release, a like sum being
put up by the barber.
Foster then started for another shop
to have his mangled poll reduced to
symmetry by the application of razor
all around.
Barney started for doctor to have
stomach pump applied, with the hope
of recovering his lost molar.