The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-05-26
THE CHILD THAT IS LOADED.
BY ALEX. SWEET.

An unloaded gun has the reputation of being particularly dangerous and full of latent mischief, but the talka- tive little hoy with good memory the traditional cRfdRf tcTrS6le--is a much more prolific source of misery to everybody within range. When 1t comes to disseminating devastation and gloom the unloaded gun has much to learn of the prattling little cherub who goes about telling what he has heard "pa and ma" say, In illustra- tion of which the following Is submit ted:
 A coterie of estimable ladies were gathered together at the residence of Mrs. Archibald for the purpose of ar ranging a church tair. There were tea and cakes and also gossip. Mrs. Dodge, a member of the church and & lady with whom they were all ao- quainted, was not present, but her lit- tie son Tommy, who was spending the afternoon with Mrs. Archibald's little boy, did stroll in, probably on the scent of the cakes and good things.
 "Well, Tommy" said Mrs. Archi- bald, presenting the child with large sponge cake, "how are all your foiks?"
 Mas all right, but pa didn't sleep none last night"
 "Why, what was the matter with him?" asked Mrs. Archibald.
 "Ma says he made pig of himself at supper, but pa says 1t was mas heavy biscuits, and ma says that If she had had sense she would have married man with money enough to hire q cook"
 The other ladies present-Mrs. Per ry, Mrs. Greenwood and Mrs. Blakely exchanged significant glances, while Mrs. Archibald proceeded to pump the boy, hoping to be rewarded, pos sibly, with family skeleton.
 "So your pa was sick2"
 "He wasn't sick much, but he just kept on dreamin' funny dreams all night. He told ma all about one at breakfast"
 "What did your pa dream2" asked Mrs. Archibald, giving Tommy a cake, who, carried away with grati- tude, turned loose the floodgates of his eloquence.
 "Pa said that he dreamt he saw you sittin' up drivin' cart full of starch, and parched coffee, and vinegar Rid pepper from house to house, payin' back the things you had borrowed for more than two years, and ma laughed and said dreams went by contraries, and then pa laughed, too. Please, mum, can't your little boy come over to our house and sleep with me ter night?"
 Mrs. Archibald said "No" in italics, and flounced out into the kitchen to attend to things, while her guests nudged each other, for Mrs. As repu- tation as borrower was A No. 1.
 "That ain't all pa dreamt," con- tinued the artless little prattlcr, kicking the leg of the table. "Pa says that he dreamt old Perry had quit tryin' to drink all the whisky in town and was workin' for livin', and ma said she was glad because she thought you Mrs. Perry oughter have new spring bonnet more'n once every four years, and pa dreamt that you Ito Mrs. Greenwood had the lockjaw from talkiR too much, and ma said if she was sure of it she'd return your call, but she didn't believe it, and then pa said he dreamt somethin' about your husband Ito Mrs. Blakelyl skippin' with money, but I have forgot what ma said';" and the dear little treasure strolled out in the yard, leaving dis may and confusion in his rear.
 "Well!" said Mrs. Perry, "and when that woman's brat was sick l sat up with her all night"
 "And didn't send her boiled cus- tard twice? Oh, could tear her eyes out. Just wait till see her," etc, etc.
 As for the results of Tommy's talk, these promise to be too narrowing and numerous to describe. Verify, the un- loaded gun is nothing compared to the child that unloads.-New Fork Mer- cury.