Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1888-11-03
FREAKS OF INVENTORS.
QUEER CoNTRIvANcES FOR WHICH
PATENTS HAVE BEEN ASKED.

QUEER ON1RlVANCES FOR WHICH
PATENTS HAVE BEEN ASKED.
Infatuation of Jar .oupling inventor.
Originator of the Bell Punch-The Lords
Prayer - The Frog Engine" Funny
Patent Cases-Rain Producer.
The freaks of the inventors mind and the
errarlc conclusions now and then reached in
it, are proverbiaL However, there are in
ventors and inventors. The great majority
of them, to believe the dictum of one Of the
Oldest and most experienced patent solicitors
in town expressed to reporter, are eminently |
rational, sensible men, to whom the saw that |
necessity is the mother of invention does not |
apply, inasmuch as they have renumerative |
business of their own, and resort to invention |
merely as a pastime The professional in |
ventor, however very often appears to be |
slightly unhinged in his mind, profound and
incessant cogitation having changed the
original bias of his intellect And then there
is the crank inventor.
"He appears in all his glory just after
railroad horror or bridge disaster. The
patent office in Washington is then flooded
with applications from men and women,
nearly all Of whom propose ridiculous, use
less or impossible things" said the patent So
hcitor. Now, many of these obtain patents
owing to the fact that the law defines tbs
term useful as merely not harmful Car
couplings seem to have the greatest attrac
tion for the inventor. l don't know how
many hundreds of patents have been issued
oar a9nT,iipfre and prlN- fayv orr N nca
To remove car couplings from the inventors
mind would be sensible decrease in the pat
ent solicitors revenues, but it would save him
much needless worry and expense. | remem-
Der the ease of such car coupling inventor
got him his patent, of course, but that man
was so infatuated with his invention that be
insisted on patenting it in all foreign coun-
tries as we'll Now, the fact OF the matter
was that while here at least his couplings
might have been used if the railroad compa-
MES had seen fit, in foreign countries they
could not be used without a complete recon
struction Of the cars, the coupling being only
applicable to cars of American build
The oldest case of an inventor of whom
have a personal knowledge - said George
| L. Chaplin, ''came to me in 1868 or 1859 with
the model of a bell punch 1t was one of the
| original base patents, and saw good promise
| IN it for him. | pointed this ont TO him and
| advised him strongly to wait for good offer,
| but he sold the invention to company in
| Buffalo for $500, whereas it was worth thou
sands of dollars, and the company at no time
| would have sold it for less than $50 600. They
made big fortune ont of it. Afterward,
when they found that their patent was not
| quite so valuable as might be, they made him
reissue the patent and paid him $50 for it
Even for this reissue he might have got sew
eral thousand dollars, perhaps more. And
| he did all this against my advice"
prominent patent lawyer in town VIII.
| prefers TO remain nameless said: "Amons
the patented models destroyed by the grea
fire was doll rigged up with wings and sup
posed to represent a human being ready fol
an aerial trip. A lady patented crimpinl
pin which she declared might also be used a
paper cutter, skirt supporter, paper file
child's pin, bouquet holder, shawl fastener O.
book mark. Another person wished me {.
apply for patent on an application of tn
Lords Prayer repeated in a loud voice to pre-
vent suffering. But as the Lords Prayer
property common to all, and its utterance il
either loud or low tone of voice is purel
optional, it is hardly necessary to ctate that
patent was refused A patent war, however
! actually granted for spring attached to
rocking cnair and adapted to be wound up b
! rocking the chair, so that lady, while resi-
t ing and rocking back and forth, would b
: storing up power that could be subsequent
utilized for operating churn, or for rockin
the baby for a portion Of the ensuing nigh
During the war person desired to obtai
a patent fer what he denominated a 'reb'
catcher 1t consisted of a large trap havin
spring Jaws and movable platform, col
. nected with setting mechanism. He pr
posed to bait the trap with arms and amml
milton and to place the trap in sight of tt
enemy, which he supposed would rush ini
the trap, spring it and be everlasting
| caught and sent TO the demnition bow WOW
as the late Mr. Mantalini would have sal
This, he claimed, would bring the war to
speedy end Another inventor presented &
application for frog engine He said
had observed the wonderful propelliI
;, powers Of the frog, and hence constructs
his engine in the shape of a frog, with t
body mounted on wheels and tn, legs co
nected with the pistons, so that when t
latter were reciprocated the legs would XII
| tiiO 5ANuiAt AiNhHSitS "a NAe hAeSN N-A@ NS
propel the engine.
Il might go on telling you great mai
more funny patent cases." said the lawyt
taxing a breathing spell, but I'll wind
by mentioning just the half dozen funnit
ones that / remember One patent is I
eradicating a tapeworm by baiti
small hooks and angling for the worn
The description speaks of a tr
made of gold and adapted to be baited a
swallowed by the patient after fasting t
several days. The hungry worm is suppos
to seize the bait and to be in turn caught
] the trap, which then can be pulled up b.
string, and the offending worm thus broug
to light. Patent for bee protector descrit
and claims a vibratory roost for chIcle
connected with the door of a bee hive. !
weight of the chickens on the roost closes
beehive doors, which remain shut until
= chickens leave their perch. Hence if
chickens are of regular habits they will eli
i the hive ut night and open it in the mornil
An application for a policeman's club, p
vided with numerous sharp teeth VIII
would spring out from the club the instan
blow was struck, was refused as being CT
- and contrary to public policy.
"A caveat on file describes q noiseless 6
i The applicant gravely stated that heretof
- the noise has all been outside of the gun,
- he proposes to confine all the sound wit
hi. the barrel by sealing the muzzle end with
plate after the escape of the shot. A per
from one of the territories filed an appli
ton with me for producing rain. In his S
cification he stated that rain was freguer
prevented from falling by an elevated I
stratum of air through which the rain co
not pass. He proposed erecting telescop
20 tower capable of being run up several b
dred feet into the air, and, after heatin
quantity of air at the base allow it to r
i up through this tower and discharge at
top thereof This, he claimed, would br
.re up the dry stratum of air and permit the 7
Of to fall. Chicago Herald
ree "