davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Grenada gazette. (Grenada, Miss.) 1885-18??, 1888-07-05
BE r. N GAY.
A Good and Most Reliable Recipe for Pro-
longing IIfe-

A Good and Most Reliable Recipe for Pro-
longing Life.
1t is tersely said that ''all fools are
mad, though some are madden than
Others and perhaps among tho mad
dest OF them it would be safe TO reckon
those who having but one Life to live
run through it in vain lamentation
over troubles which they can't avoid,
or. what Is ~vainer, over those which
they can and which sometimes are so
Tar IN the future that they never come
to bother them. To take Time by the
forelock" is a very profitable grip to
hold on that slippery old fellow; but
Trouble Is not so slippery, and We could
practice Il haste and activity rather
In keeping out of her way as long as
possible~-to build up a wall of mirth,
as 1t were, between her and us, over
which her clumsy feet would never
venture to climb.
Gravity is a grave thing. 1t may be
appropriate at certain times and in GER
tain places, but as an everyday dish it
is tough and indigestible. A continual
diet of India rubber, would, perhaps,
be as favorable to the growth and
flourish of body and mind. There
fore, If we are wise rs well as grave,
We CHn show va wisdom in no stronger
way than dropping II gravity and
'~'p,2ying the fool now and them
Even Socrates himself knew the danger
of too much gravity. and frequently
took occasion to sink some Of it in the
gay tide Of merriment.
'Mirth' says an OLD writer. 'purgeth
the blood, confirms health, causeth a
fresh, pleasing and fine color, pro-
longs life, whets the wit, and maketh
the body young, lively and fit for any
manner of employment" And if We
need further proof of its li~fe-giving
properties we can find it in the Bible,
spread forth in unoQuivocal and I'M
mlstakablc words: "A merry heart is
the life Of the flesh" saith the Prov
cribs; H1d In EcClCsiastes we are told
chat 'Eiudness prolongs a mans days
In the Flooding. matter-of-fact days
of the present, it seems, we have too
little time to think Of much else than
''bueiness, serious ~busines,;" and, when
we come TO think of it, it is a serious
business to have our lives shortened
with cares and labors-carcs and labors
that would be a great deal more pala-
table and far less death-dealing if
seasoned with Il little mirth and non
sense,
Let us reform this altogether and
take protitably to heart Shakespcare's
advice:
Frame your mind for mirth and merrtment
Which bars a thousand harms.
-YTBIP Yn'k
The Grenada gazette. (Grenada, Miss.) 1885-18??, 1888-07-05
A Unique Telegraph System.

There has grown up among the
farmers of "a county in Michigan a tele-
graph system which might be gener,
ally extended throughout the rural
districts everywhere. The system be-
gan by two farmers connecting their
houses with a wire for their W con
v~enience and operating their lines with
the ordinary Morse instruments. Grad
ually other farmers extended the line
to their houses, and after a time the
wire was run into the neighboring vii
lage. Seven years ago the combined
farmers and a few village merchants
organized themselves into a company
and it has since been extended until
now it has sixty-tive miles of wire and
ninety offices, two-thirds of the latter
being in farm houses, and nearly all
the rest in stores where these farmers
do their trading. One or two news
paper offices, as many more railroad
freight offices, the county telephone
exchange and the larger post-otices
are all connected. Every farmer is
his W operator, battery mar and line
repairer. Of course, any quantity Of
private communication is kept up be-
tween the stockholders Of this indie
pendent system. There are two or
three independent systems of these
lines in operation in the country, ar
ranged so that they a be connected
with each other at the l~ntersecting
points. and the whole scheme is being
worked very cheaply and successfully.
Chicago Times.
The Grenada gazette. (Grenada, Miss.) 1885-18??, 1888-07-05

A teacher in the West wrote to one
OF the patrons of her school. asking
why his son had been absent for three
days. The following satisfactory toto
was received in reply: james was
fooling around a steel rat trap Monday
when it went off and caught his big
toe inhickting Of damidges that makes
the wearing Of his boot impossible. 1t
awelled until it is as big us four tees
and he also has the mumps and a ring
worm and Il bile SO he can't study. He
will come when he is better."-G0Ldc.
DQW%
The Grenada gazette. (Grenada, Miss.) 1885-18??, 1888-07-05
Mr.. AND MRS. BOWSER.
Mr.. Il. Studies Womankind Under PecuI'
circumstances

Mr. b. Studies ""mankind Under PecuI +
circumstances
l n"u JUS. s'oPpco Oh tlle car Gown
,o"n uno '''e' u"' "heH encountered
MI ho"'eF' anu aiIoF looking me
~, 81, =, i7'' "' '"'"'
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Di'', . 0''NR up pair
07'C'~"S'
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w. '''' W.. '''n'' Gan spare al
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" . =" envy
9- 80" ''"' ''" ~ III
TT $780,,
u D''' u'N' ! I''u
N19 'i'''''' - 'n' 'niNS 0''o i"1u
" w '""N "''ohu' d. an
pam Wv INV - meeting W.
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| 'o' way, ,"'u W" 'ou'o
"''n ''Io 'n'' nc |n7 "ah'ns
$50" W ""N' Asn'
The Grenada gazette. (Grenada, Miss.) 1885-18??, 1888-07-05

are here to trade, and perhaps can be
of service. Mrs. Bunkum, you wanted
to look at-at-P"
Some silk" she whispered.
"Silk, ehP l happen to know the
head clerk at the silk counter. Right
this way, please, Mr.. Hammond, this
lady wants a silk dress. She'll depend
on your honesty. Cut her off a pat
tern from your best silk and send it to
the house. There, that's"
Mrs. Bunkum turned about and
walked out of the store in high
dudgeon, followed by Mrs. Lanpton
and Mrs. Thornby.
What is it?"
you have mortally otfendsa 2Ae
ladies'"
well. ! declare. What else do you
want to-day@
Nothing, | guess"
Yes, you do, You would not get
of a siek-bed to come down town and
buy a few baby aprons. You wera
speaking about a new cape the other
day. Come on"
As we crossed the street we met Mrs.
Gladwing, and Mr.. Rowser had to
rush up to her and exclaim:
is it possible? And you are down
town.
is it very extraordinary" she
asked.
1T really is. | walked down with
Gladway this morning. and he was
telling me that you We're without a
gir.. one OF the children down with the
measles and you hadn't been out of bed
for four days"
Ill had to come down." she said.
looking much embarrassed.
after medicine for the poor, sick
child, of course9 I'll run down to the
drug store with you, or better yet.
give me the prescription"
She pretended to see her sister across
the street and hurried off, but we had
only entered the store when We ran
against Mrs. Wakefield, another neigh
Dor. She vas going to kiss me, when
Mr.. Bowser had to put in with:
"Nell. this beats met
what is it?" she asked.
"Why, your being able TO get down
town. | was with your husband the
other day when he was telling the doc
tor that you hadn't a month to live"
"Well. IL am not we'll"
Aren't you9 But dear me, how I
pity you, 1t must take Il lady an hour
to dress for a trip down town. and she
must be made of iron to stand on her
feet two or three hours additional"
Yes, but had to trade. | am all
through now and ready to 90 home"
She had purchased five cents worth
of hHir-pins and two shillings' worth
of candy. Mr.. Bowser looked after
her as she tripped away and then at
the long procession of women passing
up and down. By and by he said:
Mrs. Bowser, are all these women
invalids:9'
Yes, every one"
"All under the doctors care:"
YES. most of the time"
Husbands pity them and worry
oven them?'
Yes"
And they get off their dying beds
to come down town and-and buy two
cents worth of gum and parade upand
down."
''That's IT,"
And you are just like the rest Of
them"
II am"
"Um. Yes! Yes, Mrs. Bowser
| may not be up to tea. may not be
up tonight. Indeed, I may never
come home again. When our child
gets old enough explain to him how it
was, and warn him that of all deceit
and hypocrisy in mankind woman has
seven-tenths OF it. Good afternoon"
But he came home to tea.-Uetr0iL
Errg Drrsp
The Grenada gazette. (Grenada, Miss.) 1885-18??, 1888-07-05

Miss Gossipee--"My dear Mrs.
Rongwerd, why do you permit your
daughter to receive the attentions Of
that Major Stofahp Don't you know
everybody is talking about itp" Mrs.
R.-'Well, l don't car if they are. I
know the Major and | know my daugh-
ter, and | know that only a pure Boz
tanic affection exists between them,
and there's nothing palpable in that.
I'm sure.n
The Grenada gazette. (Grenada, Miss.) 1885-18??, 1888-07-05
MRS .Jouphnes ALWAYS WIS A. luck,

woman" said Mrs. Broughne, VIXEN
informed Of the death OF Mrs. Us hus-
band. He had his life injured for
$4,000, and he only took out his policy
three years ago. Mr.. Broughne was
insured for the same amount ten years
ago, and he looks rs If he might live
twenty-five years longer. Some hus-
bands are so Indifferent to the welfare
of their wives" she added in An in
lured tone.-Drake's Magazine.
The Grenada gazette. (Grenada, Miss.) 1885-18??, 1888-07-05

These new-fangled systems for cul-
tivating the memory are all well in
their way, but wives will v find .
OF making hubby remember to
bring up the coal quite SO good as the
old-fashioned scheme Of leaving the
coal-hod On the front stairs for him to
fall over when he comes home.--Sons-
srgille Journal.
The Grenada gazette. (Grenada, Miss.) 1885-18??, 1888-07-05

The business card of an Illinois
a reads: Justice of the Peace.
Var claims u specially"
The Black range. (Robinson, Socorro County, N.M.) 1882-1897, 1888-06-08

Running NJ
rs shown Ia
ut.eitheislLe
sharp b OF u
ears.
7. w MoN
ROE FMrview.
sierra county.
y. NJ.
The Black range. (Robinson, Socorro County, N.M.) 1882-1897, 1888-06-08

CIV EN- AWAY
nHAurIFrL sENEN snoT EEYuI HER
HANDSOME WEAPON AND ACCT ATT
AnnuTEn.

EAANNA Aahs
Don't lrt this oppo tuuity. which VII be
nor a short time, g. hy without procuring one
OF thcse elegant rcyuiyors.
Evsrybudv should " n good revolver.
aud this 4 a chance that occurs unrct In a itic
eime A better rufutvcr mmn be purrhhss
ed eissw here tor S.ut. We are now inr "a
limited tlma. prepared To furnish our Plan.
BIT KENuLNEn which We recommend as the
best ever offered 90 the American public,
combining as u does all the desirable ieu-
lures known In modern pistol masiuH. THIS
hsy Diver IL really a elegant affair, per-
feet In workmanship aud finish, aud fhs
been sold out ui our regular stock 20 500
Our reason for selling thcm ut the very low
price Of silO0, l. that We are going out ut tie
business, and DO not wish 20 carry ans stock
over. You had better order early, before
they are all disposed OF. We have u very
large stock, but know that Ne shall dispose
Of them Ia ak months The Planet hevol.
var IL a i.shot. p .caltbrc pistol, just the right
gtse Tor the pocket, uud shoots easily anu
accurately. when laid away or cfried An the
packet. you may be confident that ne pre-.
mature explosion many occur This Eevnl-
yer IL Gold and silver plated, with an ele-
giant Rosewood stock. aud l. really more
handsome than any Re- vulNrr In the market
that sells for four times the money. ANY
make cartridges can be used with it. Be.
cause the price Il low, don't suppps" ttut
this Rev liver q Chcaply made. IL Is not
There l. not a stronger, better made Revolt
vel soil Every revolver s'warranted. aud
n you are not perfectly satisfied with its ap.
pearan ce and shooting qualities We will re-.
lund your money. IL il just the weapon for
svery use a revolver can be put e.. We VIII
eond Que Planet Revolver. by mail in q hauu'
some case for 81 90 or six for S. % Get five
OF your frieuds ~ send, and Won viii yours
for no hing e mone, By registered let
ter or post u mote. Remember we are sell
ing you "a .. on lkavolvsr ior 100.
PLANRr FIREARMS co, Abingdon, Pa.
The Black range. (Robinson, Socorro County, N.M.) 1882-1897, 1888-06-08
STOCK BRANDS.

on s~ithsrorhoth
"a
Alunuse D. uourquef.
Monticello. Nee Mcx
The Black range. (Robinson, Socorro County, N.M.) 1882-1897, 1888-06-08
MEg 10 rA1noxIn

rats Fapsris keps % nl~ ~ sc Dske's
A6rauisinr AE~nrF. M~sruhaufs N~4chanEa
e~@anFaueasru a.. MarHa caatfaEts fuf I'D
ca h~ manefuFtt-
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1888-01-15

III xsvs that n tho whole end OF q card
ho turned in IL means that the Visit Is IN
n for all ladies receiving, and, In
decd. this is often done. 1t may De inter-
estinr 10 the people to know how to use
cards. and Professor Keim gives the rules
thus explicitly as follows;
Inquire whether the person yon desire
TO see is in, and hand your card 10 the
servant answering the summons to the
door You will then be properly pre-"
sented. III the person is not in. leave your
card with the left upper corner turned, 10
indicate a call In person, or turn any OF
the other corners if the call be for any OF
the purposes referred 10.
ff there he visitors in the house leave d
card for each of them, or turn down inc
: RIGHT end to indicate that all are included.
a lady leaves n card for the family and
ono for each of the daughters in society.
When n family returns to the city each
uember in society should send n card to
sucb of her friends and acquaintance as
| she desires to be Informed thereof, giving
place of residence and days lat home.
A card left at the residence of a person,
whether in official or social life, answers
the purpose of a call.
A card with name and address should
| ALWAYS be inclosed, with a letter Of intro
duction. when sent by messenger or mail
\ card from one person 10 another. adj
dressed 10 third party, may he subsu-
tuted for n note of Introduction.
A stranger desiring an acquaintance
with another. may hand him his card,
| with appropriate verbal explanations.
A husband and wife may use a double
| card, as Mr.. and Mrs. -
In all cases of visits of c0ngratuiation
or coincidence, leave your card within
three days after the. event.
1t is proper to send cards by messenger
or mail in return for visits in person.
This practice is ~disrespectful in general
society, but exception is made in the
higher ranks Of official life, as il would
bc a physical impOssibility to return all
calls.
The wife Of an official returning formal
calls should leave her husbands official
card with her own This Will also apply
in private life.
In sending your card to any one resid-
ing AT a hotel, always write the name Of
the person lbl hH'ui iif'hN'i W. inv
upper left hand corner, 60 prevent mis-
takes.
The p. p. c. cards are frequently used,
and il was at Washington that the old
story started abOnt the young dude and
the statesman. The dude left his card
with q =. p. c. vi the foot Of II, and the
statesman bothered his brains rs 10 what
the letters meant. When he was told
that il meant merely leave taking, he got
up n card of his own and put the letters
s. l.. A. y. on the bottom. The dude
boiled his brains for a day in trying to de
cipher these hieroglyphics, and he finally
sought the statesman and asked him.
The old man replied that nothing was
simpler. He had no time 70 make the
call in person, and the card had been sent
10y q messenger. ANY fool, - he con-
tinued, could see what :. g. A. y stood
for, and the letters mean Sent by a mig
gerrn FRANK q. CARPENTER
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1888-01-15

small that it IS not found IN the general
maps. The Bell was a measly looking
little one horse country paper, patent in
.ides and dead ads outside. The vii
lage was so small that il was impossible
to scare up a column Of local news a
week. The editor spaced ont by writ
ing imaginary sketches Of town and
county happenings, and the news eventu-
ally reached his little place from the out
| side world that he was "a genius. The
young man wears the name of Fred H..
Carruth. His career has been eyentful.
| He was born in Mount Pleasant township,
near Lake City, MINI. lie tells me that
he spent several years lodging institu-
lions Of learning, aud was quite success
ful, though he did not wholly avoid the
vigilance Of the ordinary wayside district
school graduation. lie tried teaching
| school, and not finding the profession
agreeable to his tastes, left il to learn the
art OF printing. Sticking long primer
at - Il week was n good deal
| p%leasanter," is the way he puts
it. lie became "a wandering printer.
and spent several years tramping around
! the territories before going to Estelline.
lie rang his first Bell-aud mind you
| there WAS nothing chestnutty about IT,,
either-On the natives OF that crOssroad
OF Ang I, 1884 Then he married. and
the next year found him with one baby
and afew hundred delinquent subscribers.
The Bell, despite its unfayorable location
and its unprOpitiOus surroundings, was
full Of spice and mirth. In a few
months time it was quoted far and wide,
| and although il has now been dead nearly
two years, one can hardly pick up a paper
that does not have Il line or squib credited
to the long since detunct. After The Bell
| died Carruth went to Sioux Falls, OAK.
| and in company with S. y. Glover started
| The Dakota Bell. IL was a handsome little
| paper. and WAS quoted quite as widely a.
was its predecessor; but, despite all, it
went into s0mcthingO OF a decline last sum
mer and i'm Il short time life was pro
/ n0unced extinct. The prestigeof twOdead
/ papers did not in the least hamper Mr..
! Curruth. His writings had been so long
quoted that be quickly discovered that two
or three good positions Oh big papers were
open TO him. He finally accepted q place
on The Chicago Tribune, and is the author
Of the inimitable Overland Sketches
now appearing in that paper. Carruth is
eminently a child OF the west. His humor
IS favored with the invigorating freshness
Of that section Of country. lie is about
80 years OF age, a medium sized, good
looking man, and, unless | am greatly mis-.
taken, viii slide into history as one OF the
brightest sketch writers Of this period.
q. ii. IENOwISE.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1888-01-15

yors reeders can essy comprehend, there'
fore ] alEtane.
80 fer congress has been busy intro
ducin bills, and I hav manidged to git In
three er foar, which ef they pass will be
shore 10 git me reelected. and do a site OF
good fer my deestrick. One OF my bills Is
fer erectin a comodious and high prised
custom house and p~ostOfice in Wayback'
Other towns is gittin stitch iugshuries,
and havin them pade fer by Uncle sam,
and Id like TO kno why we oughtnt TO
have somethin Of the same sort. we
could git along without it, but we don't
keer to, and we wont, unless we hav TO,
but of this more anon.
Thar is severl other snbjecks of a en-
groasin and important carackter that
ought TO be rote up, but space ferbids me
~incrouchin too much onto you, and / VIII
stop ritin.
Wayback is bound tobe heerd from, Mf.
Edditer, and Wabash q. Waxem amt the
man to hold his jaw ef it becomes need
cessary to slay the Fillistians that ar
agin W. Yores truly,
W. Q. WAxEM, NJ c.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1888-01-15

disappearing az tines bciind an island or
q point. then suddenly bursting into view
20 describe new curves Of beauty. Even
though the observer DE comfortably housed
on terra lrma ne cannot Int feel some Of
that thrilling ol the pulse felt by the
yachtsmau. The ice boat is the swiftest
Of crafts. Far above all other means Of
rugged enjoyment during the frozen sea-
son IN the north. the Yacht ON skates has
LONG maintained its position as king.
The ice boat is II mere skeleton. n
water Yacht weighs tons where an ice
Yacht WEIGHS pounds. The main timbers
in an ice boat are arranged in the form Of
the letter Y. the perpendicular line Of the
letter representing the center timber,
which rum from the foot of the mast 90
the stern OF the boat. The horizontal line
OF the letter may stand for the rune
plank, on each end of which is a large
skate. called q runner. At the junction
of the center timber and the runner plank
is the mast bench, which acts as q socket
for the mast. From the aftcrmOst end Of
the center timber side rails run diaconally
TO points about half way between the
masts and the ends Of the runner plank.
One or two braces cross the center timber
from one side rail to the other. Morticed
into the forward end of the center timber
IS the heel of The bowsprit. 10 viii be
seen from the diagram that the outlines
Of the boat when completed are diamond
shaped.
The correct proportions OF q typical
Hudson river ice boat are rs follows Cen
tgr sfD.I,y DL foot a fnrh.l. faD.rfh. arafs
all, including bowsprit. 80 feet 10 inches;
runner plankS, 10 feet 3 ID inches, sail
area, SIS - square feet: cost. $3.50
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1888-01-15

LNfrlNAN AI|ANN~fNAf
OF course there viii Dc some loss, owing
20 friction. etc but with everything &C.
counted for the boat VIII go iaster than
the wind.
As in ~tobogeaning. the yachtsman's COS
tune IS appropriate 20 the sport, but the
beautiful coiors of the toboeganer'-
blanket suits are wanting So sec
Yachting. and the costume Of the
boatman is less picturesque. lie wears
q leather coat, o. several cardi
gan jackets under q heavy pea Jacket, OF
sealskin. his trousers are either tied
, around Che ankles or tucked into the leg
OF wooden hose; he wears linen drawer
over wooden ones; 'arctics are on ms ieet
and 70 fur cap is drawn down over hls
ears. When snow flies be wears wire
goeslns over his eyes and q wire covering
over his mouth. Even with all these pre-
cautions he occasionally gets frost bites
often forgetting his cXtrcmities m the "a
element Of the sport.
fee sailing has been common for several
centuries among tie inhabitant8 OF tue
north ofEurope. both for traffic and pleas
are. Their craft have been simple Ia
form and chcaply constructed, but have
usually answered the purpose for which
they were intended. In Russia The sled
j., moved by n jib and tOpsail, the helms
man sitting behind the rudder with the
ti.lcr turned toHard him. In mltWtnteI
the Sea Of Az0f is covered with these
} peculiar ships. Ice boating is also ~
! vogue in Holland, but there the boats arr
better
The ice ship may be found during Sis
! weeks after the first Of January oh the
| inland lakes and streams 81 che northern
United States and Canada, Maine, Yer
mont. New York, ONO. Michigan aud I'LL
nois contain the principal ccntcrs OF The
sport. Thus far tic Hudson river ha-
produced the largest boats and The great
est speed. Tine principal field Tor Hudson
river ice boatmen is an area forty mile
long of which P0ughkccps.e Is thc head
| quarters. The prevailing winds Of tle
Z cold season sweep across the course ot tlt
/ stream. thus furnishing fine conditions
! for rapid sailing. Here IN midHiuter one
/ may watch from the hills which inclo-'
the river the ice yacht and the railway
| train moving side by side, and fl thc wind
/ is fresh the latter wiz seem 10 draBslo"lg
| along bes.ce tho former.
On the Hudson the speed attained Is
marvellous. In 1879 the Lucille sailed
from ~Poughkeepsie 10 New Hamburg, q
distance Of nine miles, IN seven minutes
and ten seconds. The Snow Flake mas
made the same distance in seven minutes
In 1882 the Haze accomplished the same
feat, and at one time in her flight made
two miles in one minute. IN 1879 the
Comet, Phantom, Zephyr and Mage
sailed together ten miles in ten minutes
and most Of the time with their windward
runners elevated at an angle Of - degs,
on account of the brisk wind It A. said
that a gentleman residing 40 Poughkcep-
sic wished TO speak 10 his brother who
had started on a train for New York. He
sprang into his iccboat, passed the tram
and was on the platform Of se station d.
Newbug when II drew up.