The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1888-05-09
Pith and Point.

IN
M. =, -y,u..a., l., u.,.,..,., .,,,,od
c,rait , 10 n,rata to- 10 an,.,5 Crooired
-, 80, -. -. Il. ,,,oa
thhi Uo,i -. $500 q Pr ,oi. , a.. 3D.
ma IN pro"n ''"'y anu was p"iiou !" io'oo
'ioi'
SHE; How do you like my new shoes
AuolphE ne (ureanlly)' lhey are siii
ply iinihonso'
Young wife; wonder the birds uon
come here any more. | used TO throw them
bits OF cake | made, and" Young nus
band: THAT accounts for IT,
PASSENGER ION the street-car, alarmedl
Mauam, DO you teei NJ coming on
Madam (haughtlyl' NO, SIT; am trying
to find my pocket. "-Chrtstidn Reg'ster.
BANANAS have become so cheap in Queens.
land, Australia that their cultivation is nc
longer profitable. only one shilling per
bunch of twenty dozen Is PAID Tor the FRUIT
Two things promise fortunes to inventors.
One is to rid a room of the smell of fresh
paint and the other is to inveigle castor-oil
into the stomach without swallowing it,
DdnSude Breeze.
WHY" said the young wife of a physi-
clan, who was given to boasting of her
husbands professional skill, che cured a
patient of convaescence in less than twenty
four hours. "-Hdrper's Bazar.
A CHICAGO clergyman by the name of
Green saws that society to-day is far worse
than in the dark ages. 1t would be inter-
esting to know what kind of a church he
belongs to.-SDrinqfeld Union.
A Npwrv.ApporNrrn country posmaster
in Texas did not send off anv mail for some
time, and when written to by an official re-
piled that he was waiting for the mail-saclS
to get full before sending it to the train.
Own su,on,ar of Cone God was ro,norl,
inc on tbe color If a woman,s ear.rings and
she informed ma thav were some her bns.
hand brought from sea-thev were made of
q" the liver of Mount Vociferous. "-BoSton
Transcript.
A UNIQUE business card is that of a Frank
fort N v stove.daaIar on ono eide 10
tbe following inscrintion. "How 80 OOO
were made a oNo hv attending to vour own
bnsiness, q OoO NV LETTING other neonle,s
business alone -
Mn. JouN wANANaKrR Of PHILADELPHIA
saws. " NV nlan for fifteen wears has been
70 INV q a;naca IN a nawenaner and All II mn
with what T wanted 7 would NOT give an
advertisements in a newspaper of 400 circu-
lation for 4 OOO dodpers or nosters,
a H reason no one mas netru " " issins,
wear is because the Canadian government
fold him to shut mn or leave its employ. and
he sbut mn He made two succassfuI nra
dictions ont of a nossible two hundred.
-, 4o,-a IL. ,,a.,- o,,
On MIR 'ooh p oooh 90 oO ono
taIniis ili1ney anu che,ks Naiueu ao ~
lo Ioi,eutor l0t vne noon
for the heather reaches its destination 90
sneedilv and at so small expense for com
mission -Rosto,, Transcript
iii ~ s,a,, =, ..,o.r
ma A. VIII oe surpIlseu 10 knoM Cnac i.1n-
uon ~ one Vi .ne nealetlese c,;les III , tme
MolIu "a cIinpaIlsoii ol 81 sLaClstics Ior iooo
SHOWS .naI tne alhu ano ueatH-rate IN L0nu9h
40 ~ ~, nv i ~ W
t IoiiiiIHoiy supposeu W pe suIPaS $50
heai'hiu'' ~ Is aoo"V VwenVy -oiA III i'Voo'
A sTATIsTIcIAN says that Patti has made
her last appeaTance twenly-seven ZINES. lines
t hea posl.vely ias' appeaia s n i LINES
mas pe .i Ie!lrea rom Ine s'age
n har cnsts ,Sroa t;as ~ en
nIt .as,e 'iiiee LINES anu 10 NV seu,hli.S
aeaay 10 Jake announcer mack aV 'he puoiic
anu retire again
EDWARD, why do hear that you have
disobeyed your grandmother, who told you
Just now not to jump down these steps,"
Grandma didn't tell me not to. papa. She
only came to the door and said, wouldn't
jump down these steps, boys. And l
shouldn't think she would-an old lady like
her."-Eraminer.
A WOMAN in Georgia sat ND late in the
night recently to see a pail of ice-water she
had hung above the door overturn on her
husband when he returned from the club"
She got tired and went to bed. In the
morning she forgot all about the pail until
she opened the door to admit her mother.
me TWO LADIES are stlll as MAD as wet hens.
SOME Buffalonians who were seated at a
clearinghouse breakfast suddenly lost their
appetite on hearing the following conversa-
ton between the iandlady and the maid of
all work: Maid: 1.-THE canary is dead.
mum" Mistress: What did You do with
it?" Maid: "Threw it into the hash-box -"
The boarders left their hash untasted, and
didn't feel easy until they learned that the
new girl was English and that she had de-
posited the dead bird in the receptacle in.
tended for ashes.
Typ most ovtr.rodi,arr pri.;sh ,,o,,,,,,oa
~ raat ~ , OF
$3.50 os nid Do d., aio l,ooG VI ar
who died in 1870 aged 1863; Mr.. Fairbrother,