, 1888-02-07

ance, he thought that now the cry to
which he was 50 well accustomed at Mud
nam would Immediately resound, and
that the people would with one voice de
mand, Tod Todr' And still wonder
ing where he was to stand and speak, hC
began clearing his throat and settling his
cravat, as some public speakers have the
habit of doing.
Instead of calling for Tod, they, on the
contrary, fell into groups with their
backs turned to Tod, and disposed them
selves to listen to a quartet, which Tod
thought vas by long odds the greatest
private riot he had ever listened to-.
And amid the din of the music Tod heard
Miss Henrietta say: "Oh, why is not
Mr.. Cordova here? The music only
wants his triangle to be perfect"
'!Perfectf' said Todt to himself. "How
can all this nonsense advance the sacred
aus of temperament" But imagine the
feelings of Professor Tod when that piece
of music had been finished. Fancy, if
you can, the horror of that good man
when servants entered the room in a
sort of procession, bearing ice cream,
cake baskets, etc, alden with delicacies,
while another bore a waiter upon which
were d~ecanters containing wines and all
Sucn slntul beverages.
Thunderstricken by a sight SO melan-
choly, the professor bore it all in silence
until the servants stopped before him
him! the great apostle of total abstinence
with the water of liquid %damnation,
and a lady inquiring of him, in a soft,
insidious voice, if he preferred %claret,
champagne or liquor. Had he, then,
been invited to New York only to be
tt1tnT,1aI ar1 ,,,,,1N.Ig II -- -
thrusting his hands into his waistcoat-
his favorite attitude in his public adj
dresses-he shouted rather than said:
Look not upon the cup when it is red
''Dear mel' said the lady, while every
body began TO gather round theprofessor,
''you need not have red wine if you don't
like it. Try Chablis or champagne"
"Avauntr' said Tod, II touch not the
accused thing. Ladies, why was L
brought hither to perform my little part
in the great movement now going for
ward, if / were not wanted"
"Oh!' cried n lady, "this must be Mr..
Cordova all the while, and nobody has
asked him to play" Upon which one
gentleman looked up into Tod's face and
~propounded this timely and sensible in
quiry:
Haven't you brought your triangle,
''Oh! insult me, ladies. Shame on
you! Is it n Christian act to bring me
from my happy Mudham home, to find
myself useless and contemned?''
my goodness, my dear SIR said
another, 1--WE all want to hear you if you
will have the kindness to begin"
II am quite ready, sir, " said Mr.. Tod,
to which another exclaimed:
"AI right, sir, we desire no better;
where is your triangle?'
''Shame on you, p" cried Professor Tod,
addressing Mr.. Carhart. care you the
master of this house?'
"Why, of course / am, " said Mr.. Car
hart in amazement, and evidently regard
ing me, represented as 1 was by Mr.. Tod,
as an outrageous maniac. "Why, of
course 1 am"
"WeL then" exclaimed Tod, drawing
himself up, ''then let me tell you, Mr..
Bogey"-
'tHe is mad" shouted Mr.. Carhart.
'Mr. DOGGY lives over the way. We do
not even visit, and 1 do not know him at
all. Arc you Mr.. Cordoya, the great
amateur performer on the triangle, or
who the devil are your"
triangle again2'' cried Tod. ''Sir, 1
am Professor Tod, of Mudham, of whom
you have no doubt read (f you take The
Mudham Register or The Chickenborough
Palladium MS a temperance lecturer of
some little fame, I believe, and 1 received
an invitation from you, or rather, as it
appears, from Mr.. DOGGY"
oh! l will take the good gentleman
over the way" said Mr.. Carhart. and he
did so; and Tod slept at Mr.. Bogey's
that night, vowing that never again
would he be tempted to visit what he
called that sink of iniquity, " New York.
R. j. Dc Cordova in New York Star.