The Portland daily press., 1888-08-28
The Honest Old Soul.

lCnlcag0 MALL
We think we are moving along at rapid
rate in this steam generation of ours. But
we do not know just what the gait is until
we meet some honest old soul from the settle
ments, who has not had an opportunity of
keeping abreast of the times. 1t is his inno-
cence that amuses, but we are too prone to
laugh at his ignorance. There is something
else in tia study showing progression. /
met one 0fthese old men the other day in a
bank. He shad some business transaction
there. He faltered on the Intel of the door.
and asked if this was the Illinois Savings
It was. He glanced at the floor and saw in
the doorway foot-mat of rubber on which
was the name of the bank.
They amt dom as much bizness as they
was" said the old man. when fust done
biZness with 'em they had the sign over the
door. Now they've got 1t on the floor"
The old man was instructed on the foot
mat progress.
Then this bent the sign, but mat to
wipe your boots on?"
Eyes, sir"
swell, that beats me. reckon when I 60
back and tell Samantha about this she'll 20
off into hysterikes and say I've left the Pro
hibiti0n party agin."
He walked in and looked about the room.
The wainscotting of the handsome room is of
The old man looked around and asked:
Anybody dead?"
Looks like graveyard. SO much marble
everywhere. didn't know but what it was
new-iangled tombstone, kind of family
buryin' ground right down town you, know.
I've heern a good deal told about Chicago
men bein' mighty busy. / thought maybe
they died here and the people alive was too
busy to take the dead out to the graveyard.
This was explained to him by the visitor
who had been acting as guide.
Whats them brass things on the bottom
of the counter?" he asked.
Those are foot-rests."
"What?"
'Foot-rests. Rails upon which the GUS
toner puts one of his feet, as sort of rest,
when he is attending to business"
''Wher's the chairs"
They have none. They have those foot
rails So that man can rest without sitting
down."
RESTS while he is standing up?"
Eyes, sir"
ION one foot?"
Yes; first one foot and then the other"
Like an old goose I've got down on the
farm"
sit is quite an idea"
II thought you said it was foot-rest?"
well, same thing-foot-rest.
well, that beats me. / don't think I'll
say anything about that when 1 get home.
swear had EN-
you ought to go behind there and see
the lock on the safe 1t is a nice piece of
work. 1t Is as fine as a watch, in fact it runs
like one. When the man closes the vault in
the afternoon he can't get it open himself
of hours.
The old man looked over his glasses. The
veins in his temples stood out from the sur
face.
Don't ask me to look at anything of that
sort, he said, Il don't believe it. wouldn't
believe it ii seed it. You've treated me ali
right, stranger, and / amt got nothin' agin
you. but don't want you to tell me any
more; seed the sign on the door-mat. /
see the foot roosts on the counter, where a
man rests on one foot while he is transactin'
his bizness Mebby L can tell Samanthy
ABOUT that, and by her. smellin' my breath
mebby she may believe me. But she
wouldn't live with me, stranger, if / was to
tell her that clock yarn. 1 guess I'll git the
money on this check, standin' on one foot
while do. and then l must be shown up
the creek"