Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-09-23
Rumsey's KemOnstrauce.

When Cicero CaCkle struck hls first
case in the profession of law he made
an uncommon impression. Cicero was
though of Boston culture, not of the
Suiyanesque type physically, and when
he made ms first appearance IN Squire
Sumacks courtroom job Rumsey, the
prosecutor of the deestrict," cooked
his head to one side and whispered to
his retinue
"Git out yer microscopes, boys It's
stunted, an eff We don't keep Yer eye on
it clost We mought accidently set down
on it."
Cicero overheard the remark, but his
uncomfortable legs paused not in their
task of bearing his trail body and cyclic
peau head TO q seat convenient to his
client, with whom he WAS shortly con-
sultng about the merits of case whose
outcome would be the conviction or &C
quittal Of Jed Souple in the matter of
stealing a two-weeks-old calf. During
the preliminaries of the trial Cicero was
the observed of all observers, and the
unanimous verdict of the courtroom
ha6jtucS was to the effect Z" that he war
altogether too warped ter meet the 'mer-
gencies O that Judicial section. "
In due time the case was opened, the
testimony submitted, and Cicero got up
TO sum up for his client. His abbreviated
style Of architecture barely permitted
his getting his head high enough to see
into the jury box, and as he tip-tOed him
self into position to magnify what little
there Was of him, the learned Jurors were
observed to enlarge their ears by back
stopping them with the palms of their
hands. 1t was evident that no one IN
that courtroom looked for any more than
q pop-gun effect from an article of such
insignificant cahbre. Imagine their
amazement, however, at having their ears
assaulted by a voice of tremendous
volume and words that rather crowded
the dimensions Of the courtroom
"May il please the Court" began
Cicero. "ere the fruition of that epoch
when magna-charter envcloped civlllza-
ton by the @gis of its potential mandate
ere the arches of the temple Of Justice
were emblazoned with the inscription.
Eat jusiitid, rudt c0{iDl ere the"
"Beggin' the CO'te's pardon" inter
posed job Rumsey, rising to what APP
peared TO be more than his full height,
and looking down upon his retrenched
adversary, ''beggin' the Co'te's pardon,
but is the larned counsellor awar' that
the rcez-jeste ov this case consarns on'y
d leetle, or'nary-size brindle-calf?"
Witha movement OF his hand the Judge
waved the prosecutor to his seat, and
Cicero resumed:
CAS- ! was saying, your Honor, ere
the temple of Justice was emblazoned
with the inscription 'dat justine, ruat
cmJuil ere the ukase Of Caligula had
quenched It's horriiic mordacity in the
tidal wave OF Samarital reform /; while
yet tile"
"Ef yer Honor please" again inter
rupted MIR. Kumsey, lit do appear ter
me that my percnsick friend ruther scars
in them rcllums whar he can't see the
the PINT o this ADJUDICATION. Ef he ies'
confines himself ter the idee that it's on'y
leetle skit ov unweaned, hun-reared
calf reckon he'll"
&" Mr.. Prosecutor " exclaimed the
judge, looking at Mr.. Rumsey with an
ar of one who had AL intellect meet to
the possibilities of the occasion, 1.-THE
kyounsel for the defence is keepin strict
ter the s.achoos, an you'll please reco'-
nize the fac an treat i'm 'cordin'ly."
ain respec' ter the Cote, responded
Rumsey, making profound obelsance as
be spoke, 81 squench ny skiptercism.
but at the same tine ! wish ter remark
that ef the harmed barrister hifalutes ter
this existent over q little runt o a weazen
calf. Lord have mercy on the parts o
speech ef Jed SCOPE he'd happened to
have stole a yoke o oxen !