The weekly Floridian. [volume] (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1867-19??, 1888-02-16
Although be covets h from birth,
And cesea6 10 threagh Hlsis bsisk kspas.
Han never. never gets ths earth,
IL h the earth that g0lS the man.

boast Of but his illustrious sr,csstovv n 1iks
potato plant-ths only good belonging
20 him u under ground. -, -
1T ID very, well claimed for the man
Who went TO Sleep at . switch that his
vigiiance never Ragged" That's what
wrecked the train.-Burkngton Fes
Mise Admiration --General. were you
ever mixed up in many engagements |?
Gsneral-Quite number; but fortu-
naiely escaped with being married but
once.
"A lazy fellow who was idIing away
his time was asked BY . minister where
he expected to 60 when he died al shall
not 60" was the reply. II expect 70 be
carried. ."-+BingAomton Leader.
Nurse to young husbandl-A beau
tifnl 10 pound baby, sir.
Young husband (getting things mixed
IN hts excitsment)-Giorious! Am I
. father or q mother p Tssas Sitiings.
=. Try one of my oigars," said . fsl-
low who always smokel the cheapest he
could get. "No, thanks," replied his
friend; IL had some with my corned beef
at dinner to-dsy-Drake's Magazine.
"A pole named Hentxlstezski receutly
settled few miles from Binghampton.
From the jagged appearance of his name
We should take him to be q section of a
barbed wire fence, rather than q pole
Norristotcn Herald.
What kind sftobacco is thisr" ask
ed the customer; " long cut or fine cut ?'
Connecticut" !" replied the dealer.
And when the man smoked it, he knew
he had been told the truth, and likewise
swindled.-Puck
Fiery Anarchist-"I tell Won. INV
friend, I'm ready to die right here, If ne
cessary, in defense of my principles. The
struggle is coming, and it can't come anv
too We'd better go little further uD
the alley. Here comes policeman.
Chicago Tribune.
-He-What will you have, candy or
ice creamf
shs-No, Edward, ge. me some pop
corn, please!
He-Do you like that stuff?
She-Yes; like everything that pops.
-Harper's Bazar.
Her Cousin-I must say, Emma, that
you've grown quite handsome. There.
now, can't you give me a compliment in
return
His Cousin-Well, 1 should say that
you are gentleman Of most excellent
taste.-Hayper's Basar.
An Evil Omen" Are you supersti-
tious ?''
"Not very, why r''
"Do you believe that it is a sign of
death when dog howls under yoar win
dow at night?
Yes, if l can find my gun before the
dog gets away."-Lincola Journal
"A Creston lover who addressed a
love-scented letter to the object of his
affections, asking the young lady to be-
come his partner through life, inscribed
on one corner of the envelope, "Sealed
proposal" The result was be was award
ed the Omaha Bee.
-Husband-Why is it you can't make
bread like my mother, Mary?
MAXWELL, fatter myself that
bread was as light as any 1 ever saw.
Husband-You call that light, do your
Why, mother has to put fiat irons on her
bread to keep the wind from blowing it
away.
-George-"Blanche, think will get
married"
Blanche" Yes, George, and does your
heart beat respondingly to some one 4"
swell, no, not exactly, but can al
most support myself, and / think its
pretty mean girl that won't help little
Bit"
He lat Chicago evening entertain
ment)-Do you know that very brilliant
looking woman at the piano, Miss Breezy
Miss Breezy-Oh, yes, intimately. /
will be glad to present You, Mr.. Waldo.
He-Thanks Is she an unmarried la
dyi
Miss Brsezy-Yes, she has beeu unmar-
ried twice.
-Ysung Mani love your daughter.
sir, devotsdly. May hope for bless
ing from You?
Old Man-Have you spoken to my
daughter upon the subject?
Young Man-Yes, and she refused.
Old MAXWELL, doseu't that settle it?
Yong Man--No, sir. You forget that
am life insurance agent, and never
take no for an answer.--N y Stcn.
Caller Ito Mrs. Heudricks)-Your
daughters husband is an A. NJ, is he
not, Mrs. Hendricks?
Mrs. Hendricks "a triae sourly)-Yes,
he is about . O'Clock A II.
Observation-Disclosures, gif me . clean
white shirt.
Wife-vat! Haf your lost your senses,
Adolph7 ~
| ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS; but since dot execu-
tion We Anarchists haf to go in Disguise
-1sz0s Siftings. re as.f -I,tf
"A near-sighted man, who lives not
far from Kingstop N. Y, lad never wsrn
| or looked through pair Of glasses until
I 4 short time ago. One day peddler
called. and, among other things, be eofered
Eyeglasses for sale. He persuaded the
man to +" try on . pair. .,After the far
msr had adjusted the glasses, he looked
at objects in the room with astonishment.
Finally bis eyes rested upon his wife.
He took . long look At her, and then ex-
claimed. Jane, Jane, I never would
have married you if had known you was
% homelyl"
"A little girl who had just entered
school yesterday jubilantiy announced
to her father that she turned down all
the girls above her in the arithmetic
class and went ahead. That was smart
in you." said be encoursgingly. 6 How
was il ?" ~Wen, yon see. Miss Maggie
asknd thA Girl ~ Tia Md Rrws vrI,srh