The National tribune., 1888-06-07
\ gSHINGT0U GOSSIP
Tie Weeks D0ing5 at The Ma
iiOnal Capital

s. went Ga school 10 my brother. lie WAS
spleild. man. and with child lntulhTe lh-
e-abt into character. 4 recognized that TACT, ana
a5cred HIM as a sort OF demi-god IN couse-
,.aeaee: so when lie assigned me the subject
1or my lrst composition, determined to cover
lay5slt all over with glory by making 1t the
feature Of the day i did; but not exactly IN
ghe way had planned IT,
&c bIy subject was The Mouse and I riddled
she character OF that maraudiug little rodeut
pretty thoroughly. / described him, front view
and gable end. complained OF his propensity for
appr0pristIng 10 his own use the property OF
others: OF bus rather apt way OF biting when
his right Of freedom is iutrIngcd upon; OF his
liability TO run up q fellows pauts-legs and 10
drown himsefiu the preserves. OF this latter
statement ] never lad a moments doubt, for
once bad q hand-tO-hand encounter with his
mouseship in that sacchaTine condition; OF
which fact I did not hint IN my essay however
Eivmother was supposed to be away from home,
and the pantry was unlocked Jar OF crabs
tthe apple j mean, preserved with their stems
on. sat open on the lower shelf The tempta-
ton was too great. j must have one, 50 Selling
my booty 10y the stem-it seemed phenome-
naliy long sten-I was just about munchlng 1t
at my leisure, when j heard my maternal rea-
tive who had returned sooner than expected,
approaching. ] crammed the dainty into my
mouth, and beat a hasty retreat, chewing
hurredly as / went
thought /; and soon / discovered that it no
longer tasted pleasant; l withdrew 1t from my
mouth, and l0i there was a very badly dam
aged mouse, and that was all
But 10 return 10 my composition. 1t was
very funny thought Il the best one Of the lot,
and ] believed the other boys did too. they
laughed 50 Immoderately. / stole a glance at
my brother and his iace was black as thunder
cloud. bly heart sank into the very toes Of my
II was about TO say boots, but / remember II
was the summer solstice and ] was baref0oted.
Presently be arose FOR the duty of cTitiCizing
OCT literary productions de had kind word
Of praise for all till he came to mine, which,
having been read last, was the last to be re-
viewed.
%. This composition be began, is the least
meritOri0us OF the lot: because this historian
has utterly failed to find one kind thing to say
Of the subject Of his sketch, and YET il re-
uuired the wisdom and care OF the Infinite to
create il. The historian VINO can see nothing
but bad in any subject whatever, does not de-
serve a good word from others, and is not
safe instructor Of his kind. If you were 10
write the story Of an assassin, you could at least
tell of the virtues that had 10 be assassiuated
TO bring man 10 tie point where he could do
sucb deed
he went on quite lengthily in the same
strain. j was crushed, and It was only after many
years had passed and my reasoning powers had
naiured, that dim suspicion began to dawn
In ny mind that my worthy brother was only
the pot calling the kettle black after all,
lIasmnch as he had not single good thing 10
say Of me- even II / didn't deserve it; for
Eas hardly bad as an assassin At any rate.
This reflection, however, has never hin
dered his lesson from taking root Just as he in
tended il should, and TO this day Try to prac-
tee j.
LACE HE,DF-rRcH1EF.
One 0f our new EepTesent atives IL Congress
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perhans vou,d better return II "a The oIv1,e, D
An explanation followed forthwith. and Ia
Honorable gentleman did not hear the iourua
Of tie House read that day.
Time wagEed on and smiled ia al the win
dows Of united household for some tipC
when, alas Ia 40 uniucky moment this srates
man was persuaded 70 attend ! rs;-. and ~ "a
fair there was a postsllce. ana from that Iy1g.
Office there was issued a letter which bore Is
address deeeitiuliy upon the jmmaculat
walleuess Of is outside. He took the IettI.r
thrust il into his pocket and straightw2v DrC
ceeded 10 forget il COMPLETELY.
some time alterwzrd, a button being needle
On h.s coat, he handed It over to his wife sax
ing:
Please hunt up the rms and other dan
age while YOU are about il"