Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1888-12-16
Mr.. AND MRS. BOWSER
VALUE OF A MOTH BOOK KEPT DURING THB
HONEYMOON.
What Nr. BOwsr Said 10 His Brides Mother
After the Ceremony - Other Pretty
Little Speeches That Sounded Queer
in the PaOnOgraph.
Detr0it Free Press.

his forehead to see if he had fever. He
was reading, and he promptly gro Hled out;
"Mrs. Bowser, what particular object
have you in paving around after this fash
sh'oD? Do you expect another dollar"
Don't you want me to cares you Mr.
Bowse,?"
81 don't want you to act so silly. We
are too cid for such nonsense"
aud yet you once expressed the hope
that we might never let an hour go by
without cares5."
81 did, eh? 1 never expressed any such
thingT
"And you further said you could sit and
hold my hand whole lifetime and not be
weary"
81 never did-1everw
But I can prove it."
'If you can I'll give you $50"
Invent up stairs and got my note book
Up to the date of our marriage preserved
and fled all his Letters. On our bridal
tour kept a memorandum book. Mother
advised il, and l have found it to be a
powerful lever on occasions when hr.
Bowser has been inclined to "act mp"
When I came down with the book he
roared out:
SCOT that old book out again, have You!
That's no evidence! l brand the contents
rs base forgeryW
'But they are facts for all that. Let's
see. Here we start. After the ceremony
was over you said to mother:
STATEMENT IL will call you by the
scored name of mother. You have given
me your only daughter. ! will be true
ard loving husband to her. will never,
so help me heaven, speak one unkind word
to her.
"There it is, Mr.. Bowser, and how have
you kept that promise?"
Never said thing Of the sort-neyer!
don't remember of your mother being
there. You probably wrote that down this
very day"
1--WE were married st a. m, Mr.. Bow
ser, and at SIS we took the train for Chi
csgo. You held my hand all the way to
the depot"
MRS. Bowser, are you crazy? Do You
want to make out that was horn an
idiot?'
wen, usIe is tue pINO''
STATEMENT II AS we got into the
heck Mr.. Bowser had tears in his eyes.
He took my hand and called me his angel
and l had to wipe my nose lett-handed all
the way to the depot. think the driver
saw him, for heard him chucklirg and
saying something about you'd get over it
in about year
There it is, Mr.. BoWser, in black and
white. This is the ye'y paw you held for
two miles,
~ deny it in toto! Mrs. Bowser. I've
got to sit down and have sharp talk with
you"
THE other night" I continue, "you
were abo1t to pat your arm around me Sc
we stood in the hall, but on second thought
you concluded not to-"
81 am no hand to spoon, Mrs. Bowser-
never was. Such things look silly in old
married people"
Bot you Rugged me for 28O miles"
"Whatw
From Detroit to Chicago, Mr.. Bowser,
on that same bridal tour"
"You must be craZgw
swell, here's the proof"
STATEMENT III.-Leit Detroit at $40.
Mr.. Bowser put his arm around me at
once, and though the passengers wirked
and guyed us for bridal couple, he said
he didn't care copper. Hugged me all
the way to Chicago. Said be wished the
ride would last year. Said that Heaven
had sent me to him. l write this in room
IA, fremont House, while Mr., Bowser is
down to Look after the franks"
"That-that's there, is it?" gasped Mr.,
Bowstr.
"Of course it ISL
"And had my ann around you all day,
giving myself dead away"
"You did"
II will never believe it, never. / own
up to being little soft in my bachelor
dave, but I was no hayseed. You are
drifting to dangerous point, Mrs. Bowser,
and you should pause ere it is too late"
Il like to 60 over the old times once in
a while and see how you have char ged."
Changed! Changed! That's it! If
husband isn't making fool Of himself all
the time his wife argues that he is grow
ing cold and dissatisfied. How have l
chsDg2d?"
You never call me your Birdie any
more.n
"Ob! I don't! I suppose you've got
proof that used to call you Birdie, when
your front name is Sarahw
~ have, sir! Listen while l read:
STATEMENT IV.-Mr Bowser bought
some gumdrops of the trAin-boy to feed his
Birdie, as he said, but never liked them.
He called me Birdie from that to Chicago
and back; said it meant more to him than
the name Angel"
Mrs. Bowser!" be shouted, as he jumped
up, sis my presence desired in this house,"
"0f course il is."
"Then do not plan to drive me out Gift!
I see now how wives have driven husbands
to desperation"
''Sit down, Mr.. Bowser. We are simply
living over old times for brief while, l
had TO tease you to kiss me the other
night
YES, and I suppose you've got some
thing written down about thar, haven't
you? I'm as loving a disposition as the
next man, bat how 1t does look to see
married couple billing and co9ing like q
couple of young idiots"
And yet you ones lOnged to kiss me
forever"
II never, never did! Don't drive me to
the wall, Mrs. Bowser"
81 won't but want toread paragraph
to you. Here it is:
STATEMENT V.--Third day c our tour.
7 am very. very happy, Mr. Bowser has
lust kissed me on the chin, cheeks, nose,
eyes and ears, and says he'd like to keep
on kissing forever. He says he can hardly
help biting me On the chin"
1t was minute before he could speak,
and the bald spot on his head was as red as
mint Hn Annllu chnnkad 6n1Cn his feel.