Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1888-06-16
BIN Nye O.t Wen.


When / was out West, writes Bill IN
tho Now York World, I was calling g
the First National Bank Of Chicago.
the greatest bank, if am not mista-
ken, in America. ] saw the bonds se-
curing its issue of national currency
the other day in Washington, and I am
quite sure the custodian told me It was
the greatest of any bank in the Union.
Anyway, it was sufficient, so that / felt
like doing my banking business there
whenever it became handy to do 30.
/ asked for q certificate of deposit
for s., 900, and had the money to pay
for it, but I had to be identified.
@Why," I said to q receiving teller.
surely you don't require . man to be
identified when he deposits money!
sYes, that's the idea."
well, isn't that new twist on the
! crippled industries of this country"
T, mo; that's our rule. hurry up,
! please. and don't keep men waiting
who have money and know how to do
!, business"
SWELL, / don't want to obstruct bust
| ness, of course: but, suppose, for in
stance, I get myself identified by
man l know and man you know and
. man who can leave his business and
come here for the delirious joy of iden-
f, tifying me, and you admit that ] am
the man I claim to be, corresponding
a. to description, age, sex, ETC., with
the man advertise myself to be, how
would it be about your ability to iden-
tify yourself as the man you claim to
be? go all over Chicago. Waiting al
I, the pork packing houses in search OF .
man I know, and who is intimate with
literary people like me, and finally,
we will say, find one who knows me
and who knows you, and whom you
! know. and who can leave his leaf-lard
long enough to come here and identify
me all right. Can you identify your
self in such q way that when put in
my 81, 900 you will not loan it upon
insufficient security, as they did IN
| Cincinnati the other day, as soon Is I
J 20 out of town."
ooh, We don't care especially wheth-
er you trade here or not, so that you
hurry up and let other people have q
chance. Where you make mistake is
in trying to rehearse q piece here
instead of going out to Lincoln Park
| or somewhere in q quiet part of the
/, city. Our rules are that man who
makes deposit here must be identi-
fed"
"All right. Do you know Queen
Victorian"
mo, sir; l do not"
@Well, then, there is no use in dis
turbing her. Do you know any of the
other crowned heads?"
@No, sir"
"Well, then, do you know President
Cleveland, or any of the Cabinet, or
the Senate, or members of the House?
| "No."
@That's it, you see. move in one
set and you in another. What respect
] able people do you know?"
I'll have to ask you to stand aside, I
guess, and give that string of people
chance. You have no right to take up
my time in this way. The rules of the
bank are infexible. We must know who
/ you are, even before we accept your de-
posit."
| I then drew from my pocket copy OF
| the New York World, which contained
q voluptuous picture of myself. Re-
moving my hat and making . court So
laam BY letting out four additional
Joints in my 1.-the and versatile limbs,
asked if any further identification would
be necessary.
! Hastily closing the door to the vault
and Jerking the combination, he said
that would be satisfactory. l was then
| permitted to deposit in the bank.
l. IL H. nj
be regarded with suspicion wherever 1
20. do not present the appearance of
| q man who is stepped in CRIME, and yet
when I put my trivial two-gallon jug
on the seat of depot wsiting-room, .
| big man with q red mustsche comes to
me, and Kisses through his clenched
teeth: "Take yer baggage off the
seat" It is so everywhere. apollo
gize for disturbing ticket agent long
enough to sell me ticket, and he tries
TO Jump through little brass wicket
and throttle me. Other men come in
and say: @Give me ticket for Bando-
lin, Ohio, and be dam sudden about
it, too" and they get their ticket and
| 20 aboard the car and get the best seat,
while am begging for the opportunity
l UuV u b66b 0e iul4 AoVOC3 nA0 sAOAA
! ride in the wood-box. believe that
common courtesy and decency in
America needs protection. Go into an
hotel or q hotel, whichever suits the
eyether or nyether reader of these
lines, and the commercial man who
travels for big sausage-casing house
in New York has the bridal-chamber,
while the meek and lowly minister of
the gospel gets wsll-pocket room.
with cot, slippery-elm towel, q cake
of cast-iron soap, disconnected bell.
! q view of the laundry, q tin roof. and
81 day.
Sympathy.
| A little 5-year-old Boston girl was
Offering sympathy to Q neighbor who
| had lost little child.
"Yes, Mrs. Brown said she. II
! Lo- - 18th rs>r1