New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1888-05-09
MY ONLY ARREST.

a Few years ago l had q great desire
to enter the United States service. ]
didn't care in what capacity just so
SO long as I got my living from Uncle
Sam. Mentioning my desire to the
United States marshal for the north
#ern district of Florida, it was gratif-
ed. was at once ushered into the
presence of the United States judg ),
held up my right hand and, with a
heroism worthy OF a better cause,
swore to support the Constitution OF
the United States, though at the time
Twas hardly able to support my own
constitution. Taking my formidable
commission and a supply of station
airy, went back to the village OF
Dead Pine to await orders.
Dead Pine is a small town so nam
ed because there is large live oak in
front OF the principal saloon. Dead
Pine is not an imposing place. At
that time it had a little depot, some
stores, some mortgaged farmers
and three saloons. It also had a
malarial back country, with plenty or
chad men" living in it, a couple OF
half starved churches, and some
Christians loaning money at from 2
to any per cent. monthly to their
Struggling neighbors. It was also the
center OF a lumber and turpentine dis
trict, where prominent citizens steal
state and government timber and call
it business.
In a few days my trouble began. I
received a portentous document from
headquarters at Jacksonville. It had
four impressive and sinister looking
official stamps on the envelope, and
ordered me to at once seize the body
OF Thomas Perkins, supposed to be
lurking somewhere in the country, and
bring said body before the United
States court, then in session at Jack
sonville. By a careful reading OF the
somewhat diffusive warrant, I discov-
ed that Thomas had been guilty of
perjury IN violation OF the statutes in
such cases made and provided.
An hour later the following dispatch
was handed to me:
OFFICE OF THE UNITED STATES MARSHAL,
JACKSONVILLE, Fla
To United States Deputy Marshal, Dead
Pine, Fla.
Understand Perkins desperate charac-
ter; get help necessary; take him dead or
alive.
MARSHAL.
That dispatch made me very indig-
nant. Get help indeed! Not I! Twas
6 feet i inch in height, weighed 1856
pounds. II I couldn't alone arrest
one man was unworthy to wear the
bright red ribbon on the lapel of my
vest labeled Omitted States marshall"
Besides, if I got help, there would
not be enough glory to 90 around. I
wanted it all for myself, and deter
mined to bring in the prisoner, by
my own unaided efforts, or occupy
one OF the misfit collins at the village
undertaken
The first thing was to locate the
gentleman, who, suffering from some
affection of the intellectual liver, had
resorted to perjury. | located him.
Six miles from town, in veritable
wilderness, two miles from any other
house. lived, moved and had his be.
ing, Mr.. Thomas Perkins, in whom
this great government of our was so
intensely interested.
The next thing was to make neces-
sary preparations. / made them. In
the morning by the bright light, of a
beautiful winters day, a stout wagon,
drawn by two sturdy and reflective
mules, was drawn up in front OF the
village hotel, which was very map
propiately named "The Delmonico."
On the front seat was my negro driver
and pilot, Bill. On the rear seat sat
the writer. Under a blanket at my
teet was q Winchester rifle
and a double barrel shot gun
well loaded with buckshot. AL
though [ was oppressed with
a narrowing doubt as to whether
hadn't put the buchshot in first. In
the pocket OF my overcoat was a
Smith & Wesson double action sixty
eight, and in the breast pocket Of
my inner coat a bowie knife that
had once belonged to Texas evange.
list. "a
A curious crowd had gathered to
see me off. They knew my mission,
though Done OF them knew who was
after. They cheered me with novel
suggestions and we'll meant advice.
~ say. Cap" said one, eyed better
take a bottle of whisky erlong WI you.
There ain t no barroom whar you're
goin.'"
Ny driver looked approvingly at
this speaker.
He won't look very pretty comm
back here with furrer driv cl'ar
Through his chist, will he?' said an.
other.
'' 'Twouldn't do fer him to go out
bar hunt'n' at night with that red
nose shinin', would hit?"
That last remark hurt my vanity.
My nose was rather red, but it come
from an undue partiality for stewed
tomatoes,not from any other cause.
When you fire at him, Cap, watch
that off mules hind leg, fer he's goin'