The Bozeman weekly chronicle. (Bozeman, Mont.) 1883-1889, 1888-10-17
Human Natures Freaks.


essay in the las, Atlantic Agnes l.epplier
touches on one Of the most curious
phases of human nature-that IL, the
total lack Of logic or consistency of most
of MS in cur expenditures and economies.
She mentions the rich householis-we
have all known them, says the New
York Graphic-wherein amid lavish
luxury a large part of the family energy
is expended In trying To reduce the gas
bills, and the place is Kept tn'a great ex-
tent in a sort Of lugubriuus twilight. But
she doesn't say anything of that burning
desire to go 10 the tlieater without pay
ing which every metropolitan must re-
cognizt as the most iliustrinus illns,ra-
ton of this subject. | know a hr airy
headed and dignitied lawyer in this town,
a man of standing and influence, whose
name is familiar to a large part of this
community, who would rather take
fifteen snubbings, pay 50 out in car fare,
and make three enemies for life than pay
for a seat at the theater. If he were q
miser of course that might be compre-
hensible enough, but on the contrary he
verges on the spendthrift, and In going
to the play on deadhead tickets that he
has managed to procure by untold morti.
fication he is willing to take a carriage
and give a handsome supper aiterward.
You may put up heavy stakes that every
manager in town will tell you he knows
a dozen Just such cases.
Then who has not noted among his &C.
quaintances a hundred and one lesser
idiosyncrasirs of the same sortP One of
the ~favorite stinginesses among men is
about matches. I heard a man conide
to a sympathetic soul the other day that
the one thing he enjoyed being mean
about was matches-he declared that he
never bought them and that to do SO
now would wreck all the pleasure Of
smoking. "You must save as much as
fifteen cents a wear on them" said the
sympathetic soul.
NO." replied the prosperous victim of
this form of lunacy. II think ten cents
would cover all l use matches are in
credibly cheap now"
A young woman avowed the other dav
an uncomfortable kleptomania regarding
rubber rings. II never bought any, )"
said she, land as l always have depend
ed on picking them up the impulse to
pick them up now wherever l have a
chance Is quite irresistible. l warn you
to look out for your rubber bands"
Every woman knows how absolutely
untrustworthy may be the. nvblest of
her sex on the matter of h%air-pins, hat.
pins, black ins. and safety pins. The
world is full ofgentle. loving femme souls,
who simply depended on cabbaging their
necessary supply of these articles where
eve the can.
The worst instance of this sort that
ever came under my observation was at
a luncheon party the other day at Dor
Ions. 1t was a small and intimate party
ofthree and one Of the two young ONE
who adorned it is noted MS an aggravated
of spendthrif. She is one of those
hopeless people who have absolutely no
idea of the value of money, generous
habits, and a taste for LUXURY. Imagine
the surprise Of her friends when then
and there size was seized with an upcon-
trollable fit of economy. From some
New England housekeeping ancestress,
it appears, she has inherited a wholly
inconsistent thrift about food. By some
duke twice as many chops as were need
sd were ordered for this luncheon, and
when they appeared mademoiselle sank
into a brown study. Presently she began
suggest plans for putting those chops
where they would do mostgood couldn't
waiter be hired to take them M to A
she knew only two doors down
street? Didn't somebody have a
piece of paper in his pocket that she
could surreptitiously wrap those chops
to take awav to the poor? No CONVEX.
could lure her from this theme.
the bull was taken by the horns
md the waiter summonded and request.
10 put three chops in a box to be car.
RED away. The jov of the rest of the
was chastened bv this Illuminating
but ltttls wrecked the frugal
lend. Her mind was now concentrated
IN a large and hot sweet potato, which
vas not being eaten, her malady was
by what 1t fed on /; the success
With the chops turned her head ; she
vas bent on having that potato. 1t
wouldn't go in the box, and finally the
'ther young woman, eager to put an end
o this ghaslly discussion, offered to sur.
eptitiously put the potato in her own
and bag. 1t was done. Cheerfulness
gain began to spring around the festive
'oard, the abstracted chops, the conceal.
d potato were for. often /; then retribu-
ion, like a poisoned hawk, swooped
own, not on the offender, but, as usual,
N a comparatively innocent person
he young woman with the handbag,
u forgetting its darkest secret. opened it
) the waiter was bending attentively
yer her; a steaming heat arose, she and
he waiter both looked down, and she
id not look up. OF course the remorse
lduced by q course of crime would have
cen a trifing matter to the shame she
filtered oyer that walters discovery.
ma cnminiua moro l., L.obo.