New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1888-04-29

In a at. Tho next day We bundled her OF to an
asylum.
Arthur said my wife, we finished breakfast
IL am not an accomplished reader OF human nature,
q pbrenoogst, nor person who can Judge character
from the color of ones eyes, but We must have
waitress and really believe that can secure some
thing better than maniac"
made no direct reply TO these uncaedfor remarks,
but bade her do her best She csme into tho city
and visited an intelligence Office which her mother
occasionally patronzed. In the course OF tho day,
during which my wife sat by looking at servants all
the while, brght-looi1Dg girl came In, and bar
gain quickly made. :" I must go get me clo'cs,
num- said Julia, " wull 20 como wild me, er whero'n
mate YER
"Pll go with you,o said my wife. They rode
into doleul part of and got out Of tho street,
car before dirty tenement.
| "Me clo'es is up here. mum, and think I'll taks
a mug o. beer. II we're goln q ride on tho cars
mum, I'll be nadin' 1t. VIII 20 come up Wild me,
mum, and have SOON beer, tooi"
Poor Alice When I think Of that gaunt, bony
creature and my fragile little wife standing In 'front.'
Of RvlngOn-st tenement, the one offering the other
glass Of beer, think the height Of the ridiculous
/ Is reached.
Alice family but efectually declined the beer and
awaited the girls return upon the pavement When
reached home that evening she was In possession OF
| the house, tramping about like horse In stable.
In the morning. after breakfast, She camo 10 Anoe ano
said shortly,
"Peasc, mum, I'm goln', mumi'
"Goingl what for1'
an not be runnIn' afther the doommy, num-
She meant the dumb walter. "Thats no excuser
Alice cried Indignantly az told you distinctly that
we had q basement kitchen How did you suppose
wo got the things up from the htchenT
swell mum, 1 shant run afther 1t, num-" was the
only reply.
"What did you come out here for. anyhow" >
sPerhaps wanted a run Until the country, mum.s,
answered the saucy jade.
Alice couldn't stand everything, and when we had
got the creature out OF the house she began TO cry
Gradually but surely the servant sorrow was wear
ing our young lives away. One month Of housekeep-
Ing and six changes below starsl Both Alice and
were losing flesh The bloom Of youth was dying out
Of her pretty faco and myself becoming haggard
and irritable The cottage wherein had pictured to
myself such seasons OF unclouded peace was odous.
hated my home. even began to lose faith In my
wfc's mother. However, the lease had been taken
until May 1, and there vas nothing to do but Two
through our trials best could. So we put on as
cheerful countenance possible, and Alice started
out TO hunt a cook
She returned with an amazing little body shaped
more like a wasp than anything can think Of Her
name was Mary Scot with ono T. as to which she In!
sisted srenuousy. She had been three years In her
last place and was confident that she could do any
thing The most obvious thing about her was her
protruding bang thick matted and frowsy, which sho
was eternally carcssng, prmpng and adjusting with
her thin clawllke fingers The quantity and pendant
position Of the bang disturbed Alice, since the duties
Of cook necessarily kept her head over the dishes
Happening to pass thro .gh the kitchen the night OF
Msrys Induction into 1t, whilo she was frying po-
taoes, my wife said Mary, think you'd better ito
cloth about your bang 1t might-um, might ian
ell"
"Tie up my bangy5 she cried, fondly strpkns II,
Never; leave first"
This threat suficod I told my wife to keep out Of
the kitchen, and we'd try to forget the bang
There are some Of me credenshlls which didn't
show ye num- said Mary the next day. "ouo
ye like ter SEQ 'em n
az certainly should replied Alice whose curiosity
on this point not unnatural
"I used to be the Queen of the Ring in ne young
days, num-
"The what7'
"The Queen Of the Ring
Actually she had been a c'rcus-riderl She had
letters from p T. Barnum, Adam Forcpaugh and host
OF other showmen, with porentous contracts, faded
but still glorious bill-boards announcing Marietta
scostl In her daring bareback vaults from plunging
tho ring" and many other indisputabls
relics of earlier renown. --s
That's wot makes light an airy in me legs,
num- she said, hopping from the floor upon high
table TO Ace's amazement and distress; II was the
Queen Of ZEN ALL mum, an, wots more, was always
that espectabe"
So, In our domestic annals, changed "Msry
scot' to Mary, Queen of scots' and such he's
memory will be preserved with Us forever.
But, though an Incompatible crcus-rder shs
couldn't shake furnace, and her efforts In that d
rcction attended with such heart rending means.
such signs of despair and finally such dendlsh curses
and frowser than the day she left and She
'aid she thought she'd go get married; - ,nac.
Boxes OF New Haven, is dyin' ter have me. Tie took
,lcMy'
The little Queen succeeded by enormous
monster called Tony" She weighed at least $50
pounds and wabbled about like a bulky duck But
The knew how to cook, and for three months with
Winnie upstairs and Tony in the kitchen had decent
hough troublous service. For the huge Tony and
elegant Winnie were not harmonious spirits Tony
had been with month when one night we heard
IN awful rumpus in the servants room. Alice sprang
rom her bed and into wrapper and scampered up tho
lttic stairs to the of the commotIon. There
the floor lay Tony uttering noises now like hoarse
md putting engine, now like an Infatuated bull
"What is It, Winnie 2" cried my wife. "What
I BET"
81 think It's fits, mum. She had one the second
night she came, only she didn't take so bad"
1 for doctor, and he made her tranquil.
L was fts' but not OF dangerous Sort he said, and
Is Winnie did not seem to mind them, concluded TO
etan Tony. Periodically thereafter when were
weakened at night by uproar in the attic We knew
IL was fits" and turned over Ia peaceful slumper
gain.
But though we had waitress who could walt and
cook who could cook Our home far from being
PEACEFUL. Tony and Winnie fought like cats, and their
constant chickering's kept my wife in an excited con-
iton made up my mind to sacrifice the waitress,
hough with considerable regret In her stead we OBJ
aimed FIVE feet eight inches OF bone and muscle, tho
contemplation OF which painful to my eyes. Their
amc Joanna I told Alice that Joanna should DO
informed OF TOny's ep!leptlc tendencies since both
ervants slept IN the same room, but Alice forgot
bout IT, That night most unearthly scream awoke
Is 1t was followed by bursting open of tho attic
oor, and my wife started into the hall the rays
4 her candle fell upon the sylphlikc Joanna clad
My in nghtsllp that came down 10 her rugged