Morning journal and courier., 1888-05-10
ALL RIGHT.

Mistress-Jane, Willie informs me that my
 husband kissed you yesterday. s-ss-e Jane-Ohl that's all right, ,ma'am-I'Ye got
 used to it n0w.-Life.
 A small boy was discovered playing ball
 one day, and on being asked what he was
 doing replied: "I'm playin' ball with bod.
 I frow the ball up and bod frows it back sn-
 Life. -@. Sad.-Youngster- what is reve- nue cuttera" Fond parent Ia hard-working clerk)-'fThe individual who employs me, my child. He has just reduced my salary' Tears, idle tears. Judy. Medical professor (to student)-tsIn a case which you fad difficult to diagnose correctly, what is the proper course to take?"
 Student-''Look wise and say nothing."- Epoch.
 If man is robbed on railroad train the company is responsible; provided, however, that the robbing is done by 8 rufian in @ slouch hat and mask, and not by bare faced individual with the word "porter" on his little cap.-Lowell Citizen.
 The Rev. MT. Talmage considers "My stars!" and ''Dear mel" blasphemy. Dear mel what does he call "Goodness gracious sakes aliYe!"-an expression used by a wo- man when she sees her year~old infant roll ing from the tep to the bottom of the stairs. I-Norristown Herald. My friend" he said solemnIy, ''do you ever look forward to the time when you will occupy a mansion in the skiesY' "Well-er-no, sir; don't believe do. haven't the time. At present it keeps me busy to pay rent for seven-room fiat in Harlem. ."-New York Sun. She 'dhaye to Stoop to be Conquered-Tom Shortt (who was taking Miss Longe, of Cir. ton college, Cam. down to dinner)-'Frank- ly, Miss sLonge, the one drawback to you 1o5 &al-a | is that 8 man has to be so jolly clever for you to look up to him." Miss Longe-"Yes, | you'd have to be very clever, MT. Shortt."- ! Fun.
 "The Sermon Question. "-Curate (musi- | eal)-"But why do you object to having a hymn during the eollection!' Rector (prac- l ticall-"Well. you see, preach good ser- I mon, which calculate should move the | people to an average of half-a-crewn each; but find, during a long hymn, they seem to | cool down, and it barely briggs shilling l head"-Punch.
 A practical revivalist requested all in the ! congregation who paid their debts to rise. The rising was general. After they had taken | their seats call was made for those who didn't pay their debts, and one solitary in- ! dividual arose, who explained that he was the editor and could not pay because the rest of the congregation were owing him their sub- riptions.-Exchange "Howdy, AwthawW "Howdy, Chawlya Whats wronga" 'Why, Awthaw, you know l that vulgar wowdy, Jawnsawn?" f'What, the fellah that says either for i-ther?' "The very same" .He looked at me wudely this | morning as l was pawsing by and said: 'Deah l me! What an old humbug Bawnum is, to be
 suah. to advahtise his menawgawy was en- ! tiahly destwoyed. ."-Baltimore Herald. A citizen stood in an unsteady way gazing at a front door on Fifth street the other | pI- nl haIo tad rbo hot way halted and asked: Hooking for the key hole, old fellowa'' 'fChee hole?' .- "Yes."
 "No, zur. I've goz way beyond zhat, sur. I'm looking for Ter door itself. Sheems to ! be too many of lem here. ."-Detroit Free
 Press.