New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1888-09-16
NEW YORK LIFE.
TIE NrATJI,NDED PHYLLIS.

| mcnacc Maria was the domestic, ana hsr ms
dcmcanors had broken on them gradually Iho iH'.
that she was OF bbulous habit at hrst merely "io'
an attractive plquancy 10 h3r pefsonciie but "heh'
e., ono disastrous evening she broke three coffee cups
and splt boiling water her foot. II was actiy ac-
! huowledgcd that much piquancy. Ike Lazy ,laFa
| vcrc dc Verc was not 10 be desired Ihcn In tnoso
| erst balcron months of welded bliss when Maria,
| returning from the house top, owned with
| .icnbantnc contrition that "The wirds
| ,orren all yer handkcrchcrs of tho lipe'
| and IFS only wan of thin kin fond,' 1ootoo no
marnanimous forgave and bought more handherchle;s
only they cheap ones six for scvcny-hVe cents
At = spcclaI sale She also bought box OF patent
| clo,hcspins the most wonderful discovery oil inc
acc warranted never to break to get out OF order
| .you sec they're very simple said she. proudly
exhibiting the purchase TO the listening Maria hrSt
,ou nrcss II here and then you pull there, and then
| lets see-whcr's that piece of paper win mo
directions printed on t?-Oh yes reads attchuVeb
Oh yes now know. then you turn this nut ana
that screws IT up tight, and they Will hoid cioheS On
the Inc forever"
ou.stinc q repetition of tho feat. The marvellous
clothespin performance again with easy elegance ana
! rapidry.
| Keep the directions for awhile cautioned
Tootoo and then you W i know tbom By heart
| But the handkcrchicfs continue to disappear Rudo
Roreas has a special spite against them The patent
| nde
ruin some OF them stick. and some OF them get stepped
| op-a fair encounter with Mara's boot sole would
crush the patent out Of anything and some get lost
and one morning Maria used some for knding-
though she never told any one-and the cats pulnu
,ce ont on the gutter and the butchers boy trying
10 discover the way they worked which you never
could do without the directions, broke two.
Sc And us not sorry am they're gone.' said Maria,
snorting In angry explanation 10 loo'"o' "'o '''
deliver ne from patent"
But hcIo were other faults in Maria as wcl a. that Oh
absorbing handkcrchcfs. Just a, this Time her young
man." Dick, became assiduous In his attentions
ono wouldn't have minded, OF course II he had Deeh
ouleter in his cOurtship but DICKS idea OF lows
voung dream was not that usually accepted In polite
Iie A deep growing voice and merry Wit had
Dick His mutered sallics-thcy only camo at inter-
vals like GASES I'm long deserts OF ponderinS silence
were hailed by his trusting fair with shHeh' oi
rapturous mirth. 1t was quite interesting Wheh
George and Iootoo were alone
What DO you suppose Le can be saying that's so
funny p, said qootoo consumed by curiosity, as an
apprcciatve shrek rose from the kitchen iou were
lever half 50 amusing when you came ACQUIRING
81 should think by the nature OF the yells ne was
sticking pins into hcr. I'd Hike to hear what ne says
lie must he awfully clever
1t was all very amusing when they wcre aloh'
ut when there wore visitors. ono evening when
1oo,oo was entertaining her most elegant and clab
ucitcd l,mps Snug faced coachman, and glitterinS
harness stood at the door the focus Of every pair OF
cvcs I'm the bulldns Maria, in ths kitchen. must go
and have one Of No vocal nr,ahons with the re-
doubtable Richard who appeared to oe in particularly
GOOD form that evening Young Nr Round,r tie IS
famous for the set Of his clothes and the impeturD
ability Of his manners. he imports BOTH stood it like
an Anclomanlac-onc can say no mOre-for fun half
hour Then. as Dick continued TO coruscato with I'M
wonted splcndor, each new witucsm greeted
with convulslve yell Of exquisite amuse ncnt, Mr.
Rounder's manners slowly succumbed. His Inward
uncasiness eNnced Itsclf an Inability TO keep still
Tie hdgetcd about on his chair, and stole fearful
frtlye looks at Tootoo. She, Of course. was in an
agony.
Il believe 10 thinks we've got a crazy woman
chained UP in the spare bedroom, like the man In
Jane Eyre she confined TO George afterwafd AZ
the time She wa, so annoyed and angry and confused
she could do nothing but look uncomfortable and
guilty. one look at her large fixed eyes ought to
have confirmed Mr.. Rounder in his suspicious of the
concealed lunaiic George came TO the rescue lie
=, a wonderfully qulc. fllow in such emergencies.
How Toooo blessed him he sad. nonchalantiy cross
Ing his cg giving .ond suck to his plTe, and looking
up al tho ceiling
How lively that baby Of Mrs. Icvy's is this oven
ing. II yclls like that two hours on stretch some
Zines. The pleasures of fat, Eounder'
IT'S tce.hiug.~ said Tootoo. feebly "And 1t has
COLO very badly dutrt bfof-c VIII inc WN't I'M
bushinc mcndacity.
OF coulsc Mr. Roundcr should have been convinced.
and. 10 give lhe devil his due he dill ty to look as II
he believed q. But there was strldent quality IN
a,aiias love notes which not akin to tho dulcet
strains Of infancy.
After this George said he would have to PIT stop
10 Dick when meant that the kitchen dor must be
shut on all evenings when ,laras prccndcr made his
presence heard throughout the dat Msra's other
friends and relatives filed the vacuums between Dicks
visits. The Ilobohcn and Harlem continsents were
particularly solcitou- about their knSwonan. They
dropped in upon Maria at oil hours. Too'oo met ono
in the hall al dusk. me Cousin PATRICK" frockled
boy carrying large black bag, unnaturaliy dstcnded
The next time he came Tootoo, who going ont,
ticcd that the bag Nat wellsuckcd orange
" I really thought II black tray he was carry
ing II looked 80 thin, and when came back in two
hour, him at the corner. and the bag was sweed
out like an inflated balloon what do you suppose he
had In it!' Thus Tootoo in the evening to George.
Let us look through my clothes At oncc' was 7
Georges only comment.
II took long time 10 discover all the dcpredatlons
Of me Cousin Paihrcl-S 1t was well into the winter /
before George found ovcrcoat missing aud his crush
hat box vacant. Bat all this wao months later Mo |
Cousin Pathrlck covered his tracks neatly and well |
and Maria, when imorously questioned by the IIaus-
frau, said with superb scorn
The bag, And awl II held a few rags I'm send |
in me sister FUR the chillthvn.'
She looked like embodiment Of injured virtue,
and also extremely warkc with vrtuous, un-
ninching eye fNed on the trembling Iiausirau and a .
suggestion OF unlimited Vtupcratiyc power, in the /
cock of her eye and the wassng Of her fat, rcd chin
hat 1ooioO crushed. II is 10 d. feared that she
apologizcd and known thai SD, told Gcor-e thcy had
been unjust 10 Maria, who honest. faithful soul
Her honesty and faihfilpr-s not subjected TO
question I'LL later In the season when Tuotoo was dis
covered sitting dscou,olatc by the empty hat box
Ike Marlus over Carthage, this delicate question be
Ing rudcly revived by the nappcaiancc of the hat.
Maria Lad long gone hunce-nOt TO her celestial
ward. bar 10 those earthly in which Cousin Path
rick and the black bag played the part Of the Record
ing Angel
The final rupture rose from Marias idocy. a George
called IT, thief Is bad enough. bit an idiotc thief
f. more than even newly married human nature can
bear