Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1888-11-21
A Kentucky Justice.

primitive manner, weave their own
clothes, pay no taxes and never vote
at elections. They are comparative
harmless-that is, the great Kentucky
product, the family feud, never draws
them into the whirl of deadly excite
ment. They look with suspicion up
on all strangers. They do not believe
that people with whom they are not
acquainted have any right to enter
their domain.
Several weeks ago United States
post Office inspector rode up to the
cabin of squatter to inquire the way
to postoffice known as Benson's Jaw.
An old fellow, whose most prominent
feature was large hawkbill nose, sat
on log, which, placed near the door
served as bench.
"Good morning"
The squatter scarcely looked up
He was, with piece of leather cut
from horse collar, attempting to
patch an old shoe.
II would be pleased if you would
give little information" said the in
spector.
Don't bPeve I've got any this
mornin'. Had good deal yistiday,
but wife she drapped the pan an split
it ALL"
"You don't understand me. want
information concerning-"
"Yas" the squatter broke in, "drap-
ped the pan on the hath and split
every drap of it.
The inspector threw one leg over
the horn of his saddle and settled
down in position of amused contem-
plation. The squatter covered the
hole in the shoe with scrap Of leath-
er and whistled in sort of split>Aute
way.
"How long have you lived here ?"
"Long ernuf tr war out my shoes.
"What is your name ?"
Squire Brown"
"Are you justice of the peace ?"
"Yep."
"When were you elected ?"
want 'lected."
Appointed by the Governor, sup
pose."
II don't"
"Then how did you get the Office 2"
"Found it running loose and took
it up. Thought it was a stray ca'f at
fust."
"Do you mean that you really hold
an Office without being elected or ap-
pointed?"
"Yep."
"You surely don't try cases p
"Yas, do"
at is a wonder the people submit
to it,"
"Kain't help themselves"
"Does any one ever take an appeal
from your court ?"
mot now."
Did at one time, eh ?"
yep"
what did you do?"
"Whupped him."
"What did he do after that :"
"Axed me fur a new trial"
"Then what did you do ?"
Whipped him again"
at is wonder that the people do
not appeal TO higher authority !"
There hain't none higher in this
heresneighborhood."
"You are at the head of the law,
then ?"
Yep"
"That is all very singular, must
say, and should like very much to
see you hold court"
"Thar amt very much holdin' to
do. The fellers come up with their
complaints and l lissun an tell 'em
whut to do"
Suppose one man kills another.
What then ?"
"Wall, eff he didn't do it far, we
whup him, but thar amt much KILN
goin' OH round here"
Suppose he steals a hog ?"
Then he amt got no show. We
hang him"
"Do you get pay ?"
"Say, Quitting his shoe aside and
looking up,) do I look like start,
nat'ral fool ?"
"No."
"Wall, then, do you reckon er man
kan erford ter spend the most NV his
time in 'ministerin the law without
pay2 Some weeks / make fifty cents
and then again ! don't make but
quarter"
"Well, | must say that l never saw
such community before"
"Neenter see il now lessen you
wanter. Nobody drug you in here, /
reckon"
"No, that is fact. Do you know
Of postotiice called 'Benson's Jaw ?"