davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25
stage OF the Rivers.

OFFICIAL si0SAL smvicE y. Al
MEnI1fis, Feb q. pm.
Tho following observations are taken NJ all fla.
hour later than Memphis time
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25

CLEVELAND, o., Feb. I.-Petroleum
steady, 9. W. ll00, 7Nc.
WILMINGTON, N. G., Feb. 2i.-Turpcntine
Firm at CSC.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25
Provisions.

fpH-M ackcrel, halfbrls No. 1, 500 No.
R.2o; No. p -, ION Nit No. 4, Si.iO
lily, 2Sc per box.
Hoo PnopucTs-sicady; moss pork. ais 30
@lU.0o sugar cured hams, iictiilsc. break.
fast bacon, iiaiihc; bulk pork, clear sldcs.
81 clear rib sides, 7H@7jtci long clear, 7Ssc;
L,ao--Iss 5,.ci half brls, I,Eoi kcg,, 7,sc;
Pi0s' fErr-Bria, $3.50. half brls. tiOOa
100 kegs, 800.
FHrsn MrArs-Choloe beef, hlndauartcr.
eci iorcquartcrs, tci second grade, hind.
quarter, &C. forcquaricr, Be. sheep, &C.
Hogs, &c.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25

corrtr-Conmon, l7Iic; ordinary, isc;
TAR, lslicalec; prime Rlo ieifaeoc; choice
70 fancy, n@22c; old government 2s@9oc;
suoAn.-purc white, Ogc; OF white, 0,fc;
yellow clarificd, OIl@0Ac. opsn kettle, $40
5%c; refined A. O,.c; liandard granulaled,
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25
EXCHANGE.


New York aud cities north and east, on
Demand 4 discount buying New York
and principal cities north and east sight "a
discount buying. New Orleans, 81 discount
buying.
Selling Ratcs-on New York, 4 per cent.
premium on sums below $1,000, $3.50 per
$1,000 premium on sums Of 81 900 or more;
on Cincinnati, st. Louis or Louisville, $3.50
per q, 900 premium on all sums on New Or
leans, $3.50 per 81 600 onall sums. Prime
commercial sterling sis9@4s2K.
Dizziness prevailed at the stock call board
session today, and few bids or offerings were
made.
The local cotton market closed steady,
sales $500 bales. New York spots were firm
with futures quiet and up ? 10 points.
New Orleans closed firm, and futures steady
at nm advance Of = 10 points The Liver
pool market was quiet without quotablo
change In prices futures were barely steady
and or point.
At New Orleans the sugar market contln-
ucs active. All offerings find ready sale,
and buyers are compelled to pay full quota
tons. Molasscs is quiet and unintcrcsting
Rice Is quiet and firm, receipts light and Of
ferings small.
In reference 10 the general grocery trade
the New York Commercial bulletin says: I'VE
find among majority OF tho trade !ittlc II
any disposition TO modify previously enter
tanned views Of the prospects, though active
developments may be delayed somewhat by
the protractcd winter weather, and It's effect
upon cost and facilities In the matter Of
transportation. Yet II Is not overlooked
that many localities have for long
time been practically shut Off In their
freight communications, and must have run
down aocumulations 10 very mcagcr proper
lions, and with scarcely an article on the
list, with the possible exception OF rico and
refined sugar at the trust price, but what Is
comparatively cheap, II Is reasonable 10 er.
pect good trade at some period not far dis.
tant Today's moves were generally light,
with no important changes except further
weakness ON speculative coffee"
The coffee brokers annual report received
At Rotterdam makes the worlds product OF
coffee for isS0-s7 i0,3iO0O0 bags, and csti.
mates the product Of isS7-Ss at 0,s50, 900 |
bags.
In the local market business Is steady.
Quotations are comparatively unchanged,
almost everything being shade better and
improved In tone.
IMPORTS.
scysntyseven brls beans and peas, 10 pkgs |
butter, 10 pkgs bacon, i25 pkgs boots and |
shoes, 500 bu corn, 95 SKIS coffee, 2i0 brs lime,
l,2o3 sks cotton seed, Is cars cotton seed, |
$40 pkgs dry goods, q pkgs eggs, 765 brls |
-four, 1900 bales hay, IS pkls hats, Is head |
hogs SO head cattle, o. head horses and |
mules, sos pkgs lard, 10000 Il lumber li2 |
pkg liquors, 1900 bu oats, 800 brs poia-
toes, cars pork sides, l7s brlH sugar, $50
pkg tobacco.
ELEVATOR REPORTS.
Tho following shows the amount Of grain
received Withdrawn and In store by regular
elevator, ~ reported 10 tho Mcrchants ex-
change today: Corn received, 1883 bu; |
Withdrawn, ~ bu; In store, 23,os5 bu. Oats |
received, 1900 bu. Withdrawn, ASIA bu; In |
store, sass bu.
mA.As and ss..Ls
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25
90 ST. CHARLES ST., NEW oRIRA,
OF PRICELESS VALUE.

cannot speak In too high terms OF your curr-
cuRA. II Is worth Its weight In pnrc gold for skin
diseases. believe II has no equal.
w. W. N0RTHRUP, l,0l5 Harvey st., Omaha.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25
Live stock.

snrHr-Choicc. 4Gtifc, medium, 3.a
SIC; common, ti.0)ai.5o.
L.sHs-ChOioe, 500 common 10 good,
Per head, sl.5Off3Oo.
Grt~ carTLE-IhOioe, 3iffatc; rood, ~
G3ito. fair b medium. 2+azLc, -calla.
VAC. il.diHo. feeders. light 2s1Jle.
heavy, 2.e5c.
IIoss--cboios ligbs. $50. good. tlxSsc:
oOnm0n. lAllllIc.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25
DAILY corroS STATEMENT.

lmporis-MS g II X. 1876 bales: NJ 4 z n r, 1877;
Id Mr. u, vt Ma l. n 2i6; g, WRR,
w H. No&TR X, l0l CM&DR X. AIS;
steamers $50; wagons 10. Total. LES bales.
o SIS w kR. 3oG LNo& 4 n, go Total,
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25

Lospos, Feb. 24i4 p. m.--Consols closed
at l2bo9l6 for money, and io29s for the
account. United States bonds As 128s<;
United States bonds 3Xs lOsJs. The Bank
OF England gained Gl5,OOO bullion on bal
once today. Bar silver, As i6-1Gd per
ounce.
pAms,,Fcb. a.-Threc per cent. rentes s2f,
l0c for the account.
BANK cLEARlNds.
CmcAdo ILL.,, Feb. 24---Bank clearlngs,
$l0,30i, 900.
ST, LouIs, Mo-, Feb. 2i.---Clcarings, 50, 1884,
46i; balances, $3.50, s3s.
BosroN Mass, Feb. "a. -Cloarings, $15, 3i7,-
37s; balances, 81 ,99i, iO2.
NEw York, Feb. 2i.--Clearings, $si, $780,
go balances, A,5i1, 1913.
BsIrrMoRE, Nd, Feb. 9I..-Clearings, So
1856 232; balances, $307, 1856.
NEw ORLEANS. La, Feb. 2i.-CleariDgs
OF tho banks for today, T., 2l0, 2ss.
PnILApELruIA, Pa, Feb. 2i.---Clearings,
$40 2SS, 1888; balances, $i,5ii, 900.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25
FINANCE AND COMMERCE
MONEY 9 PER CENT. NEW YORK rx-
CHANGE la PREM, sEIsLlN0.
Cotton Steady Middling Cotton o $40
--sales Today, 2, 500 Rales--rhe Tone
OF the General Market steady-Moats
Steady.
ArrrAL ofricr,

FRIDAY kvEStSo, Feb. -, lSSS
Money is in fair legitimate demand, with
good supply at the banks. Rates continue
firm at per cent, and all bank customers
receive liberal accommodation.
The clearinghouse report is as follows;
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25
WEEKLY COTTON srATrMryr.

Receipts at Memphis for The week ending
February "a, o,7Bo bales, as ngainst 1854
bales last week, and II ,0l0 bales same week
last year. since September I, GoeCIO bales,
against Go5,6j bales sapie time last year.
Shipments for the week, II. 900 bales, as
against 1885 baies same week last year;
since September /, 4G9,G6i bales. as against
5O2,777 bales same time last year. Weeks
sales. 1850 bales; exporters, 1850, and
spinners, 4, $50 bales.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25
NEW YORK.

Spots opened easy and closed FIRM mid
ding, 10 o-l0c. Sales, 800 bales. Quotations
were rs follows Ordinary, li-iGc; good
ordinary, 9,lc; low middIing, 10 i.i0c; mid
ding 10 oi0c; good middling, 10 i3-l0c; mid
ding fair, II 7-iGc; fair, " lice.
Futures opened steady and closed quiet,
as follows; February 1917; March, 1890
1888; April, lo.505oIoCe May, 1905; June,
1913; July. i0TIdlD.75; August 1877;
September, 1928; October 0 a9@oos; Novem-
Der, o.s2@9s3; December, o.s2@oSi; Janu-
AIRY, os9@09o. salos, los, 200 bales.
New York cotton statement for week end
ing February ~, 1883.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25
Miscellaneous.

WHfsKY- Strnight Kentucky Bourbon,
sl.5O@000; Robinson and Lincoln counties
TcnncSee, Sl.i06D3.00 Eastern Rycs, $3.50
600, according To age and make; com mon
whisky, oOc@i.25, according 10 p.oof.
BAGGISo--5617c.
Tns-Sll0@l.i5.
snor-Drop, Si.i0; buck, Si.O5.
LEAD-6lc.
NMrs-iron. 2.iOs2. 10; steel, 90. o5@2. 10.
PowDEn--Kegs, s.; half kegs, s2.75; quar-
ter kegs. $3.50.
Tonlcco-Common, 25@95c; other grades,
35dS5c.
sSurr-Carrctts, $ios5; Ralph's, $40 %;
railroad, S0.25; Gail Il Ak. 500.
CoL Om-Prime white, wholesale lots
i0c per gal.
HiDB-Dry flint. No. I, isc; No. .. ioc;
dry saltcd, 760c; green sailed No. 1, 6Z@
&C; No. 2 5@5l4c; green, dose; sheep
skins l5cG1si.00.
Woodbury. grease wool, unwashcd, i3@
lsci clear grease wool, 2392jc; bury washed
DVg5oc; tub washed, 33@J5c.
BEEswAx-iSd2Oc.
TALLow--3m3i2c.
Funs AND SKINs-Dcer, 90G35c; bear, A. 90
@7.00; mink. i5C1i0c; coon, hunter handled,
i6@76c; country handled, I5600c; otter,
81 .OOa5.OO; beaver. 5Oc,dS5.O0 Wild cat. f5G,s
2Jc; fox, i5CG75c muskrat, 100 loo; opo, sum,
lOctl5c; wolf 50c@{2Oo; skunk, l5@76c;
panther, bOcaSi.O0.
sEEDs-lled clover, sl.75Cf5.25 per bu;
timothy. S3.25 per bu; herds, 50t955c per bu;
blue gras-, si.2o per bu; orchard grass, 81. 40
al so per bu; red oats. 47CaJOc per bu.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25

SQ0il3h Kidney and Uterine Pains and weak nesses,
XSINI relieved in ono minute by the Cuticura
MFk0Anti-Pnin Plaster the first and only
wv pain.killing plaster. New, instantaneous,
infalliblc. 20 cents.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25
Hand. and sfaeLs.

The following list IL corrected regularly
and may be regarded as The latest quotations.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25

PsIsr CRrpE oIfe-S3c; prime summer
yellow, Td3sc; choice cooking summer
yellow, tots4ic; OF summer yellow, &C;
miners summer yellow, &c; prime cotton
seed meal. si6 7SCdi7.Oo. car load lots; less
than car load. Sl7.76laIsOO
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25
- WEAK, PAINFUL BACKS,

DfAIPLEs, black-hcads chapped and oily skin
HIM prevented by CuTIcuRA MEDIoATED Soar.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25
ELEVATOR REPORTS.

Tho following shows the amount Of grain
received, Withdrawn and In store by regular
elevators, ~ reported 10 tho Merchants en-.
change today: Corn received, 1883 bu;
withdrawn, ~ bu; In store, 23,0s5 bu. Oats
received, 1919 bu. Withdrawn, ASIA bu; In
store AZ AS I'm
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1888-02-25

Receipts In ports this day 1883. tGl
heccipts Ia ports. this day issi.........,..laOj5
CONSOLIDATED STATEMENT.
The weekly Caucasian. (Clinton, N.C.) 1882-188?, 1888-03-01
A Blind Mans Ingenuity.

will YOU please set my watch right
has run down."
The speaker was blind and he handed
handsome gold stem winder to his
friend. The friend put the watch right,
told the time aud then handed it back
10 his blind friend, saying, "Of what
use is a watch to youl How can you
tell the timel'
"You have just set the watch at a
quarter to two," said the blind man,
and now it is fully wound up. II wish
to know what the time is this evening
shall rewind the watch and count each
Of the clicks as / tura the key. There
are forty-fve clicks, for example. Now
have found that nine clicks correspond
20 100 minutes, SO that if there are
forty i've clicks it will mean that eight
hours and twenty minutes have elapsed
sin &C the time the watch was set, max
ing the time five minutes past 10 o'clock.
always remember what the time was
when l wound it up last, and so by a
title care and calculation can always
come very near what the time is."-
| New York Mail and Express.
The weekly Caucasian. (Clinton, N.C.) 1882-188?, 1888-03-01

Owing to ill health, says Bill Nye, the
humorist, l will sell at my residence in
town 90, range IS, west, according to
government survey, one Pushed -rasp-
berry colored COW. agel 8 years. She
is a good mi!kster and not afraid Of
cars-or anything else. She is COW OF
undaunted courage and gives milk fire.
quently. To man who does not fear
death in any form she would be great
boon. She is very much attached to
her home at present, Ly means of a trace
chain but she will be sold to anyone
who will agree to treat her right sh'
is one-fourth short horn and three
fourths hyena. Twill also throw liz
double barrelled shot gun which goes
with her. In May she generally goes
away somewhere for a week or two, and
returns with tall, red calf with long,
wabby legs. Her name is Rose, AMI
prefer to sell her to non resident.
The weekly Caucasian. (Clinton, N.C.) 1882-188?, 1888-03-01

The earliest reference to shaving is
found in Genesis XII: IA, where we lcad
that Joseph, on being summoned before
the king shaved himself. There are
several directions as to shaving in
Levitticus, and the practice is alluded
TO in many other parts of scripture.
Egypt is the only country mentioned in
the Bible where shaving was practiced.
In all other countries such an act would
have been ignominious. Heroiotus men
tions that the Egyptians allowed their
boards to grow when In mourning. So
pa5teaaE NsEs to shaving at
subject of reproach and ridicule, and
whenever they intended to convey the
idea of man of low condition and
slovenly habits the artists represented
him with beard. Unlike the Romans
of later age, the Egyptians did
not confne the privilege OF
shaving to free citizens, but obliged
their slaves to shave both beard AID
head. The priests also shaved the
head. Shaving the head became GUS
tomary among the Romans about $50 B.
c. According to Pliny, Scipio Afri-
canus was the first Roman who shaved
daily. In France the custom of shay
ing arose when Louis XIII. came to the
throne young and beardless. The
Anglo Saxons wore their boards until,
at the conquest, they were compelled
to follow the example of the Normans,
who shaved. From the time of Ed
ward III. to Charles l. boards were
universally worn. In Charles II.'s
reign the mustache and whiskers only
were worn, and soon after this the prac.
tice of shaving became general through
out Europe. The revival of the custom
of wearing the beard dates from the time
of the Crimea, 1S54-55.--- Penman':
Journal
The weekly Caucasian. (Clinton, N.C.) 1882-188?, 1888-03-01
Warming the Shiyering Poor.

In many cities on the Continent in
days of extreme COLI, the municipal
governments, from a fund previously
set apart for the purpose, place at inter
walls among the crowded neig ghborhcods
of the poor large iron brazicrs, which
are kept filled day and night with hot
Goals. They are circular upright reccp-
tacles, about the size OF barrel, with
an open top and with holes pierced in
the sides for the purpose of drausht.
They are placed upon the pavement near
the sidewalk at the corners Of streets,
where crowds may collect about them
with the least obstruction to traffic.
During the bitter COLI weather crowds
of half frozen people huddlc about these
braziers. Boston Advertiser.
The weekly Caucasian. (Clinton, N.C.) 1882-188?, 1888-03-01

When Charleston built for the Bri,on'.
sport
The spongy, hardy palmetto fort,
And the ships with their topsails taut and
thin
StorIncd over the bar at break Of day,
Gun and swivel and culverin
Shouting their murderots roundelay.
good,
Time after time, in the soft, sly wood,
a venturous shell, from the Moreland's deck
Struck the patriot staff. and snapped it
quite,
Neat in the middle, without one leck,
AE7da whirlei tIss &c S--o-.- -s1e~-fss.ssf--s
height.
But Wi liam Jasper saw from his post,
And, his young blood seething, still as a
ghost,
Straight through the perilous fire leaped
down,
Leaped down, and back, by leopard spring,
The smoke in his eyes, erect and brown,
All in the beat of a swallows wing.
And he'd close, close, as be climbed alone,
The banner sacred and overthrown;
And quick, with that steady hand of his,
Notching its loops on his ramrod bare,
With $50, my beauty and one frank kiss,
Flung it again to the glad, free air!
Then the friendly tides turned clean about,
AMI slipped from under the frigates stout,
And Sir Peter Parker's crippled fleet,
With its dsembarking, bewidered crew.
Gropcd and fumbled, and got its feet,
And recled off into the seas enew.
Tis the old tale; how ours sat down
At dusk in their fair beleaguered town,
We seal their valor, repeat their VOWS;
We keep their memories east and west
We sing their praise through the happy
house;
But of Sergeant Jasper. who knows the rest:
Who asks it! Peace to his ashes cold
The Carolinian grasses fold.
To the fond boy heart, in its little hour
Symbol and vision of loyalty,
Homage. The root whereof he was flower
Bears hundreds, happily, such as he.
Let emperors sleep in their gorgeous FAM"
For U.s. forever, some quiet name,
In which no armorer's skill is versed,
To mock at history's calendar.
And once through its ordered p1ge tc
burst
Like headlong, glorious August star!
-[Louise /. Quincy in Boston Post.
The weekly Caucasian. (Clinton, N.C.) 1882-188?, 1888-03-01
A Man With a Silver Hand.

Daniel Goodwin of Weymouth, Mass ,,
has a German silver hand, and, not
withstanding the fact that there are no
fingers on it, he is able to keep pace at
his trade-that of carpentcring with
those blessed with the customary num-
Der of digits. An injury to Mr.. Good
wins own hand necessitated its ampu-
tation. 1t was not until he hal invent
ed substitute, which he hoped would
enable him to support himself and
family, that he would consent to have it
amputated. His scheme consists of 4
socket, reaching half way to the elbow,
into which socket the stump is placed,
and at the other end of which hole is
drilled with thread cut. The con.
trivancc ia great success. Mr.. Good.
win has surprisingly large number o.
useful tools ithat fit into this tapped
hole, and he can drive nails all day witt
hammer thyt is held in place by /.
check nut scrk kwed aaaia.4-Ai6
the eocLet < soon, as he =
a;s.ss air - puae ; table knife out D.
Of his pockcf with bis left hand
screws it into The socket, and proceed
| to business. - Boston Herald.
The weekly Caucasian. (Clinton, N.C.) 1882-188?, 1888-03-01
The Cost Of q House.

People who are going to build may
like to know that "a three thousand
dollar house, is ono that the architectu-
raj paper says can be built for 81, $50.
81; costs s., 100, according to tho ar
chitecfs estimate is worth $3, 700, the
carpenter says, to build; increases IN ex'
rense ito a, 800 during the process OF
erection, and makes yon draw your
check for 8, 953 % before you move II
and net your Hrss bill for rspai1. :
Iiournsl OF Edueatien.
The weekly Caucasian. (Clinton, N.C.) 1882-188?, 1888-03-01
LEES BACKACHE PLASTER,

Backache II the bane OF women IRON early
school-life TO old age, and few females are
without it for fully three fourths of every day
Of their life. Well, tn" great remedy for this
distressing complaint IL LEES BACKACHE PLAs-
TEn, which scores Of Clinton and hundreds of
Sampson women pronounce the best Plaster
ever made. This Plaster is composed of fresh
Balsams and Gums and pure India Rubber,
md is tho result of ten years experience in
compounding plastcrs. Backache, weak back
sore chest, heart and liver troubles, kidney dis
eases, rheumatism, and Arly all pains speed
lily cured by it, II never irritates the most
sensitive skin, but soothcs and strengthens the
parts. Try one. Prepared and sold only by
7. J. LEE, Druggist.
The weekly Caucasian. (Clinton, N.C.) 1882-188?, 1888-03-01
An Expensive Request.

A Philadelphia lawyer was appointed
solicitor for a certain business house in
that city. At the end OF the year he
was asked to send in his account. which
he did, by Jumping everything. simply
saving, $50 and So, DR.. to Professional
Services, $4,000. The manager was a
great sticklcr for form, ard sent back
the account, asking for an itemized
statement. The lawyer did as requested,
and at the bottom tackled ON the follow
ing: ITO preparing itemized state
ment, $780," After murmur OF horror
and astonishment, it was paid.
The weekly Caucasian. (Clinton, N.C.) 1882-188?, 1888-03-01
JT.mid Young sustU

Tsmid Young 6uftur
consent OF papa: Aad now a
you, sir, whether whether
daughter has any domestic ecconplis
mcntsi Papa (sarcastically): Yes, 81
she sometimes knits her brows.
at is pretty blue up at the house."
said Mr.. Twinsy, mournfully; 'Tve got
cold, My wife's got cold, babys got
the measles, and my eldest daughters
got piano. Which is the wa cst
park to sleep inf'
Omaha mother. tWhere is Mr.. Nice.
fellowf' Lovely daughter (sitting g slone)
..."Gone home" "Home7 It's only {
o'clock" "Yes--he asked me tote
marry him, and--and I said no. and.
and he went right off, boo. hoo! hoo!'
GLOW is this. my son, Jou write and
,ell me that you're up and dressed every
morning in time to SEQ the sun rise,
while the president informs me that you
lie in bed till o'clock and afterg'
"well, you see, father, the sun risc' till
moo, out here
Charming yourg hostess: why,
Major, you are not going SO soon:
Major (who prides himself On being ono
of those fine old-schoo. fellows who sal
say neat thing without knowing it)
"Soon? Madame, it may seem soon x
you; but it seems to mo havc beer
here lifetime"
81 saw you looking on at tho tobo2
gan slide in the baseball park on th'
west side yesterday said Brown to tn
Chinaman who had just brought in nj
laundry. "What do you think OF to
bogganing, Johni'' "W-h-i-s-h
Walkec backec milccl" said the China
man.
It's the strangess thing. inethinks.
That maiden crimps and prinks
TIN she wins her beau-idcai Of the lnds.
: And then doesn't care snap
II The sses her IN wrap -
And ween-euS pair = aiippsu q - =
The weekly Caucasian. (Clinton, N.C.) 1882-188?, 1888-03-01
Hu MOR0US

4 hotel call-boy never takes aflroni
when the clerk yclls 'FRONT.'
The English language sounds odd 10
a foreigner, as when one says, ~ will
come by aud by to buy a bicycle"
Tie man who makes your knuokles snap
And says, I'm glad to meet yoa,"
Is very frequently chap
Who'll readily forget you. =
Did you ever see doctor kick a
banana peel of the sidewalk, or tell an
acquaintance that no WAS sitting IN a
draughtl
New Jersey swain calling on his
girD-What makes tho hous, shake 20,
darlinsl Girl-Its pop, stairs. He's
got the fever n aguc agiu.
In q play recently produced in Pari
there were twenty horses on the stage
rOrs aaoV--rrAssy sssas- sa\ \lsa.fa...a.a,
came to an end without hftch. 4
A laundry which stands in the shaded
Of an east-side church, Buffalo, teal
the appropriate legend on its sign boar
Cleanliness is next to Godliness."
YES" he said, 81 began life as
farmers boy, and to-day ! am worth
millions" ''To what do you attributc
your SUGGEST" ITO getting away from the
| farm as soon as could"
A book agent tried to sell Pittsburg
woman volume entitled "rhe Ar. Of
Speech" yesterday, but sho cast such a
wiihering look upon him that tho
wretch skunk away in shame.
A sportsman is man who spends all
day away from his busines $2 for pow.
der and shot, and comes home at night
tired, hungry and ugly, dragging q
n fourteen cent rabbit by tho cars"
There is a general feeling of content.
ment among the Chinese laundrymer
over the trade Of 1891 Some Of them
have saved up s75 and are going back
TO China to live in case and luxury al
their life.
We know OF no picture moro ksenly
portragant Of human anguish and tn
awful consciousness of imminent disasts
than that ola dignified man with
mouth full of baked beans trying 70
press q sneezc.
| A scientist says: 'sIf sno
Aattened out the -scA -
miles deep al ovs