New-York tribune., 1888-04-18
THE TALK or THE DAY.

Saws "Ouldar. do not smoke have never
smoked and It is, think, silly and injurious habit
(pace all my dear friends who smoke all day long
which has to so many ore OF the chicf neceS
stiles of life. But as mon are constituted nowadays
they are not happy without smoking they do not talk
well without It and therefore, for PHYS SAKE let
them smoke!
Schools of War Hlstory.-First Father-l tell you
It's shame Ny boy goes 10 school and knows all
against 'f the ndans the French and what not to Say
nothing Of the Mexican War; but not one word do the
schoobooks teach about our great CIVIL war; not
second FatherMyy boy Knows the Civil War from
"Ehl lie certainly didn't learn all that at school ~
"No Whenever there is to be an election for
Conclmen Aldermen or anything like that l sond
HIM to all the Republican mass meetings.
World.
There arc thirty mon in St. Paul who are worth a
million or more. And the other adult males of the
city expect to become mllonaros in few months.
Why There Was No MIIk-A little girl was sent sent
across the street TO nolghbor's for milk. The COW
which tho neghbor owned had ceased to give mix
for the time and there was none to be had
There is no milk to-day" said the little girl on
No milk ~ said her mother. whats the mat
ter?s ,,.,. .on ma what u,. t,u ,rott.rr was tbs
reply, but guess the COW alnt laying Just now
Boston Courier
The English chemists now say that they have dis
covered In fuornc a universal solvent. 1t combines
with all the metals. In uniting with sodium, potas-
SUM, calcium, magnesium and aluminium, the metals
become heated even to redness by the fervor Of Its
embrace. Iron filings, slightly warmed burst into
brilliant scintillaons when exposed to 1t manganese
docs tho same. Even the noble metals, which even
at a melting heat proudly resist the fascinatons OF
oxygen succumb TO this chemical siren at moderate
temperatures. Glass is devoured at once, and water
ceases to be water by contact with this gas, which,
combining with its hydrogen, at the same moment
forms the acrid glassdissolving hydrofuorc acid and
Iberates ozone
The cost of tho flesh forming material in oysters
is very high When they are 20 tI cents S quart, tho
while the cost Of protein in milk at cents quart,
is q cents %RSa m our salt and IN % Beef Sm
cents to 81 O6 Therefore oysters classed del
for these delIcaces is steadily increasing and under
the efforts OF the shcsh commissioner OF New York
the supply G yo T sSOq sv Sa
Housekeeping
Tho lens Of the Lick telescope magnifes $4,000
times. 1t would be good instrument through
which to view the convictions Of the Democratic
party.
Old Men for counsel-Young Man ION railroad
my savings In a little enterprise, but Pm feeling
mighty doubtful about It lust t.0 now understand
can % hardly find time to sleep o1erran with Orers S
Ing En- sf' What business ines % arc you u in = ''
"Liquorr-(Omaha World
When an inferior star appears before Montana
audience they unanimously shout that much abused
title spelled backwards.
A Nice Legal oueston.---Bobby had wcksdly eaten
part OF the preserves the SHELF and his mother
Shut him In the closet
On letting him she discovered that he had eaten
the rest of the preserves.
Nightly dspleased, she asked him why no had done
so.
Because MAJ Bobby replied, al heard pa toll
one OF his clients that person couldn't be punished
twice for the same onencer-(The Epoch.