davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
SAW THE JOKEIN AJIFFY.
!. Lady Teacher Taught Il Useful Lesson i
Kindness.

\ Lady Teacher Taught II Useful Lesson in
kindness.
A boy in school was having very fun
ny time by sticking a pin into the legs of
the boy who sat next him and laughing
at his antics. The teacher caught a
sight of the proceeding, and taking q
pin, went to the first mentioned boy and
said: .'WOuld you like to have a pin
stuck unto you like that?" He laughed
as though he thought it might be q CAPT
tai Joke, whereat the teacher used the pin
rather freely, and his jumpings and
sqUirmings accompanied by his "Ows!'
and endeavors to save himself by the
use of his hands, attracted the attention
of the whole school. The teacher finally
asked him what was the matter, and why
he did not sit quietly, and when he said
he couldn't, sit hurts" so, the teacher
said, "well, that is just the way it feels to
other people, Have you had enough
of it?" He was very decided i'll his
opinion that he had, and the teacher
took occasion to say few words to
the school in regard to their treat
ment, not only of each other, but of the
lower animals. She said: II saw boy
kill toad last night, and | wondered if
he knew that the toad is help to US, and
ii he thought of the toads suffering
Most of the boys looked thoughtful, a
few laughed, and the very boy that killed
the toad raised his hand and said, "What
good can a toad DOR Upon the
teachers inquiry among the scholars she
found that only few knew anything of
the good toad does in the garden. Il
was the means of reform in that direc-
ton, and talk on the uses of birds re-
vealed the fact that very few of them
knew that bird is of any use whatever.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
Christians and Evolution

One who believes in the God of Chris
tiRnity is bound TO believe that creation
Is His work from end to end; that 1t is a
rational work, and the work of Being
who Is wholly good He Is bound TO be-
lisve that Goods mercy is over all His
works" that mot sparrow falls to the
ground without His knowledge, that
there are design and purpose everywhere.
But he is not bound to know or to say
that he knows what that purpose Is, or to
shos that marks of benefcence are every
where apparent Still LEGS Is he bound
TO assert. as the old theology did, that lie
can demonstrate the wisdom and good
ness of God from Nature alone. Evolu
ton starts with an "ect of faith"
postuIate of rational nature-viz-, that
everything is rational and has
meaning, even that which is at
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
4 Bad Man.

Texas Siftings: He called himself Rat
tlesnake Bill, and he looked as if he
might be bad man to handle. He was
up for drunkenness.
DO you plead guilty or not guilty ?''
asked the justice before whom he was be-
ing tried.
''You don't try {. man before the in
quests are held, do you? Don't you take
me around first to the uniertaker's shop
to identify the remains? That's what [
have been accustomed to do in Colorado.
[ am always asked to identify my
cOrpses."
"What remains; what inquests?" asked
the recorder.
"The mangled remains of the police
man who tried to arrest me-" said the des-
perado.
"You are laboring under some halluci-
nation,my friend" remarked the recorder.
"You didn't kill any policeman last
night"
"Then he isn't dead yet? Take me to
the hospital where his life is ebbing
away. In Colorado I'm known as the
Jumpin' Jimplecute that chews up rail
road iron, an they alters take me to the
bedside of the dying policeman who had
tried to arrest me, so that he can identify
me as the cyclone which devastated him.
Have you taken the ante-mortem of the
policeman 1 partially destroyed last
night?"
Il don't know what you are talking
about" said the justice. "You were ar
rested and brought to the lookup by a
little stick of tailor who couldn't sleep
on account of the racket You made"
$50 was arrested by civilian, was l.?
O, well, that's all right. At first 1 was
afraid 1 had disgraced myself. l was
afraid 1 had allowed a squad of police
men to take me. Any citizen can arrest
me with impunity. Civilians are beneath
my resentment. A civilian can kick
the Ghoul from Ghoulville, who
picks pieces of men from between his
teeth after he has breakf2sted, and I'll
not lay my hands on him. You can't
make me fight an ordinary citizen. It's
officers of the law I'm after. When want
a fight | want some two or three police
men to tackle me as an inducement. 1t
takes five able bodied policemen to make
it interesting enough for me to let my
self ont | never fish for sardines'
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
TO be continued
Ben-He.

An old gentleman recommended "Ben
Har' to one of his young friends, advis-
ing her to read the book by all means.
Meeting him soon after, she told him that
she had inquired for it at several book
stores, but none of tkem had the book.
What did you ask fort" said the gentle
man. Why, Ben She,' of course re-
piled the lady. A few weeks later the old
gentleman received an invitation to the
yourg lsdy's Wedding, and the bride,
groom's name CHANGED to be Benjamin.
"Ah," said he, as he read the card, "she
failed to find Ben Hur,' but she hsd bet
ter success, it seems, in the search for
Her Ben
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
A Pat and Call. p"

This is a funny phrase to the uuinitiated, but
AL the brokers understand it. They use it when
person gives certain per cent. for the option
gwen. 1t is often a serious operation to the
dea.er, hut there is more serious 'pu
and cali than this: when you are PUT
t. bed with severe cold Oand you
f"eudS call" physician. Avoid all this by
ksnpin1 in LIE house DR.. Perce's Golden Medi
cal Discovery. The great cure for pulmonary
aEt blood diseases. Its action is marvellous. Il
cures the worst cough, whether acute, lingering
or chronic. For Weak Lungs, Splitting OF Blood
Short Breath, Consumption, Night-sweats, sud
kindred affections, it surpasses all other medi-
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
SPORTS AND SPoRrSNEN.

A bicycle club is to be organized at
Stevens Point.
Art dealer (descanting on the virtues
of the picture -"You Will observe, sir,
that the drawing is free, that" Agri-
culturist-"Well, if the DRAWN is free,
an you don't tax me too much fer the
frame, b'Cosh III take it,
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
CHAPTER yIL-AN ACCIDENT.

The vari sble spring. the hot dusty sum.
mer davs succeeded each other. aud the
partners worked steadily tLrou III all
They had CLEANS OF diversion too, for
Nine. Debrisay had friends and acquaint-
ances OF her OWN profession who often gave
her tickets for concerts, aud orders for the
theatre. These were amuSc.aents of which
Mona hrd eajoyed bat li;ti. during her
rcsidetC. with her grandmother, whose
fixed principle II WAS never 10 pay for any.
thing OF the sort. They were source of
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
Applying Paris Green 10 Potato Vines.
baltimore American

As the potato bug is already at work
among the Eoung potato vines, We
give TIE following hints for the use
of the principal remedy for their de-
structien. In applying this poison it
is much safer and quite as effective to
mix it with water and sprinkle it upon
the plants with q small dustsr, than to
mix with plaster and sift or scatter it up
on the leaves, yet the latter method Is
practiced aud highly recommended en-
account of involving less labor than the
other. The danger of applying in this
form is the liability Of inhsIing the pois-
on by the party who applies it, unless
done on dull day, when the air is still.
One pound of the parts green, mixed with
800 pounds of land plaster will do the
work as effectively as though a larger
proportion of he poison was used. It
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
A Word to tba Wise i, Sufficient y

Catarrh is not simply an inconvenience, un
pleasant to the sufferer and disgusting to others
it is an advanced outpost of approaching dis
of worst type DO not neglect its warn
ing; it brings deadly evils i'm its train. Before il
is too late use DR. Sage's Catarrh Remedy 1t
reaches the seat of the ailment, and is the only
thing that will You may dose yourself with
quack medicines till it is too late - till the
streamlet becomes a reSstleSs torrent. 1t Is tho
matured invention of a scientific physician. "A
word to the wise is sufficient"
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
The Most Valuable Life.

Captain-No scrambng down into that boat,
you cowardl Give the women a chance.
PasSenger-For heavens sake. don't insist on
thati They've got only their lives to save am
in charge of one of the Prince of Wales old
coats for the New York fall fashion model
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
CHAPTER IX.-'OH, MY PROPHETIC SOUL, MY
UNCLEr'

UNCLEr'
In Il few minutes the severe Jane en-
tired. and told them there was ''a-gen-
tleman'-shc hesitated before pronounc-
ing the wanting to see Miss Craig. -
SHOW him in ut once, Jane" said Mime.
DebriSay, graciouSly, and the hero of
Mona's adventure came in slowly, having
left his hat in the hall
You'll excuse me" he said, falling on
tC chair. rather than taking n seat but
am varra frail. It's Il long way from the
station here. | told You. missee, | would
not forget yc, and | haven't"
Very pleased to receive you, SIR" said
Nine Debrisay, bluntly.
But you should not have taken the
trouble" added Mona, compassionately.
Il wanted to come" he said. wiping his
brow with n red cotton pocket-handker-
chief. First, | wanted to pay We back
your sillcr''-hc extracted small bag
purse from his trousers pocket. and took
ont siNpence; and there it is" laying it
on the table. Next, wanted to ask YOU
few questions, if you don't mind"
"C.rtaialy not.''
lie drew forth her card, and looked Mt il.
slowly rca ling it, Miss NJ. J. Craig"
Nv nat DOES the VI. and the J. stand for?"
Mona Jo>cclyn."
''Fary nre not very Christian like names.
Wuerr Il / yoIr father live?"
IN GLASGOW"
All! AID now, what WAS your mathlr's
namcE"
"Newburgh."
"Ay, just SO. Your fathers name was
John Craig, and ne was a clark al TIC
Western Bank of Sc5tlaud,"
His name was John; bat | know little
els about him. 1 rem member family that
he was kind and loving"
Well. l knew him-knaw him from his
habyhood. My name is Crnig-Alrxtud,r
Craig, ard l am your fathc.'s eldest bro l.
err"
'Indeeir' cried Mona, touched. hay.
even pleased, tomeet anyone of her fathers
blood. Then you are my uncle-my own
uncler'
II am that" he returned. earnestly.
But, my dear sir calculated Mime
forgive the caution of an old
woman of the world-can You supply some
proof that you are this dear child's nearest
relativc@'
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
Lung Troubles and Wasting

Diseases can be cured, if properly treated in
time, shown by the following statement from
sufferer from pulmonary attacks, and gradually
wasting away for the past two years. it al, rdS
me pleasure to testify that SCOTS Emulsion
of Cod Liver Oil with Lime and Soda has given
great relief. and l cheerfully recommend 1t
to all suffering in a similar way to myself. In
addition, would say that it is very pleasant to
tnI
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
The Shirt of the Law.

Uncle Rastus Ito his employer, a lawyer)-Dey s
q man watin' outside de do, sab, TO twenty fl
Gems fO' cahrin in de coal, sab.
Lawyer-But, Rastus, expected you to carry
in that coal.
Uncle Rastus-Yes, sab; but you see Mistah
Blank, was only hi'ed to do the Office wuk an |
was 'fraid dat eff l cahrid in dat coal 'twouldn't
10 lnr,al Snh
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
MAoARoNI WITH CLARET.

Use the small Italian macaroni called
sphag ETH; do not wash it; put it over the
fire in plenty o. boiling salted water and
boil it for ten minutes, or until it is just
tender; then drain it and lay it in cold
water while the sauce is being made; ten
minutes before dinner time drain it from
the cold water, heat it in enough sauce to
moisten it ar d serve it hot. Quarter of
a pound of macaroni will make enough
when cooked to serve five or six persons.
This dish is useful when half of bottle
of claret remains from a meal.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
A Wife's OuGortunity

Write your name and address plainly on q
postal card mentioning this paper) sending same
to J. d, Larkn & Co, Buffalo. n " and they
will send you, on 30 days trial, of their
Great Boxes advertised in a recent issue OF
this paper, of Sweet Home" Soap and presents
Better accept the offer at once, as you run no
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22

In every community there are number of
men whose whole time is not occupied, such as
teachers, ministers, farmers sons, and Others
To these classes especially we would say, If
you wish 70 make several hundred dollars
during tae next few months, write at once to
B. Z. johnson & Co, Of Richmond, Va, and
they viii chow you how TO do it
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
Delicately Put,

Mr.. Auger-"Er-aw-what have you there,
Miss Keene?"
Miss Keene-'It is Mr.. Goodform's card, Mr..
Anger"
Mr.. Augur-"Ah-er-is he particular friend
of yours may aSk?''
Miss Keene-"Why, yes; I like him better than
any other man l can think of just now. He
makes such DELIGHTFULLY."- short calls "
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
A Domestic Argument.

II am surprised, Bobby said his father ret
provngiy, that you should strike your little
brother. Don't you know that il is cowardIy to
hit one smaller than yourse}f?"
Thu "hy do you hit me- pa?" inquired the
boy. with an air Of having the better of it.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
A Yard Will Do.

Miss Brown Can't you spare me n little more
money this week, pa? That's dear, good
father.
Brown-How much do you want, childf
oh, only enough TO buy cloth for bathing
suit
"Of course my dear, of course. Here is a
luaTter.N
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
SAUCE.

To make the claret sauce for macaroni
brown a tablespoonful of sliced onion in
the same quantity of butter, then stir in
a desertspoonful of dry flour and brown
it; next add cupful of peeled and sliced
tomatoes, half that bulk of green celery
stalks chopped, six cloves, a small blade
of mace an6 half pint of any sold
broth or gravy; season aud sauce palata-
bly,, salt and pepper, and simmer it until
the vegetables can be rubbed through a
sieve with a potato masher. After rub
bling the sauoo through the sieve add to
it half a pint OF claret; drain the spha-
getti, heat it with the sauce and two
ounces of grated Parmesan cheese, and
seryo il hot
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
THE HOUSEHOLD.
SWEET POTATO PIES.

When the potatoes are dry and mealy
take a quart after they have been pared,
boiled ana mashed; quart of milk, four
eggs, salt, nutmeg, cinnamon and sugar
to taste. Bake the same as squash pies.
If the potatoes are very moist use less
milk.
SUMMER ''BowL DRINKs'-EURMITY.
Bruise two quarts of wheat, or take the
same of prepared cracked wheat, and put
it into stone jar with two quarts of
water; bake slowly till quite soft. Take
two quarts of new milk, stir the wheat
into this till it is as thick as custard, add
four ounces of well washed and dried
raisins, and simmer all together till the
latter are cooked. Beat the yolks of
three eggs, with nutmeg and three
tables poonfuls of milk, add this while
the furmity is over the fire, stir well,
sweeten to taste, and serve either hot or
cold,
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
CAPITAL NOTES.

Theterms of tweuty-si1 United States
sepators-thirteen democrats and thirteen
republicaus-wille expire next March.
President Cleveland has hal portion
of the grounds at Oak View laid ont with
fruit trees and will try TO raise some gar
den vegetables this summes.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22

why John, IS said his wife impatiently, as she
opened the door and found him still in bed, you
promised faithfully last night that you would
get up in time to go to church with mer'
meant in time for evening service" explained
John. turning over luxuriously.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
Many men of many minds:

hdhy pIIs OF VaIIDus kINuS
Bat for a mild, elective, vegetable purgative
you had better get Dr. Pierce's Pleasant Purga-
tive Pellets. They cure sick headache. bilious
headache, dizziness, constipation, indgesti ion,
and bilious attacks; 25 cents a vial, by druggists.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22

ROUGH ON PILES. Quick. complete cure. SOC.
BUCHIUPAIBA, Great Kidney Remedy. 81.
WELLS HEALTH REVIEWER for weak men.
WELLS HAIR BALSAM. II gray, gradually
restores color: elegant tonic dressing. SOC.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
Business Onuortunity far Eitber Soy

We want one person only in every town to sell
our goods. No capital required. A grand chance
TO make money, no matter what other business
you are doing you can work for us. Write at
once and secure your territory.
B. S. LAUDERBACH co,
NEWARK n ].
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22

In the Park-Mr Darringer (who has weak,
ness for pretty nurse girls): . hat pretty
baby (snapping his fingers at the baby and boldly
eyefng the GRID and such elegant carriage.
v hose baby IS t:' Pretty nurse: 1t is yours
sir Ms Larringer hired me this mo- ming "
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
On Board the Steamer.

Mss Al find yor friend quite entert aiming
when he forgot HIM IN. Is ne American OF
sn Engiislman:
MI B-Nei her Hes a BostOuan
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
SLICED OUCUMBERS.

If the cucumbers have not been on ice
peel them and slice them into cold sailed
| water. Just before serving dry the
slices on a clean, soft cloth and dress
them with oil, vinegar, salt and pepper;
one tablespoonful of vinegar, three of
oil, a saltspooDful of salt and quarter
their quantity of pepper will dress pint
of cucumbers.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22

ROUGH ON ITCH Ointment cures Skin IIu
mors. Pimples Flesh Worms Ring Worm. letter
Salt Rheum, Frosted Feet Chilblains, Itch, Ivy
Poison, BARRIERS Itch. Scad Head. Eczema soc
Druggists or mail. L s Wells, Jersey City, n. j
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22

ROUGH ON RATS" for rats, mice, bugs, lSc.
'RoUea on CArARRH." Only absolute cure. TO-.
ROUGH ON CoRNS," Hard or scft cornS. l5c.
ROUGH ON TooTHAClIE," Instant relief. lSc.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22

"Gentleness can not be kicked into a cow,
saws an exchange. Neither can tenderness Of
there wouldn't be much tough beefsteak.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
w II Y Z?

WHY do | have this drows>
liteleSS feeling? WHY do l have
Baekache? WHY Neuralgia and
rheumatism? WHY does Sroful-
Gus faint and ErySipelas show itself?
BECAUSE your blood is filled
with Poison, which must be Com
pletely Graduated before you can
regain health. You must go to
the root of the matter. Put the
kidneys-the great and only blood
purifying organism complete order,
which is complete health, and with
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22

Senators Quay and Cameron of Penn
sylvania say that their state will go solid
for Sherman, now that Blaine Is out of
the presidrntlal race.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22

LOOK YOUNG, prevent tendency TO wrinkle.
or ageng OF the skin by using LEAURELLE OIL
the features \ transparent. alabaster skin. SiOO,
Drug SITS OF exp. Z. S. Wells, Jersey City, y. J.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22

Mother And do youreslly feel so
very bsd, Bobby" Bobby-"Yes, ma. ]
sin't quite sick enough to need any medi-
cine, bot I'm q little too sick TO so to
school"
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22

Anticipating Profanity.
MIR. parrinSer. thst is rather tousk chicken
Do you intend 10 sarvs itl'
Certainly, ny love"
Then wont you please carve it before you
say gTaceS"
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22

Monie has created the greatest excitement rs
a beverage. IN two years, ever Witnessed from
me TACT inst 1t brings nervous, exhausted, over
worked women TO good powers Of snauranc, II,
lew days; cures the appetite for LIQUORS aud
tobacco ut once, and has recovered a large mum
only.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
Ever your attached

81 am not SO sure about that, said Mona,
smiling, as she put the letter which she
had read aloud, back into its envelope
But am most grateful to her for writing
Mt all. She is really nice, dear thing"
$50 she is" replied Nine Debrisay
"Why, Mona, there's a little man trying
to open the gate-an Old man, with a stick
and an umbrella. 1t must be your mill
iOnaire."
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22

An unpopular youth Of Cologne.
With $ pain in his stomach did moSue;
He hesysd a great sigh
And 50 ii. y would dish,
But the loss would be only NV o-ns "
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
SCOTCH STONES.

One pint of -four, one half teas poonful
of sugar, one fourth teaspoonful of salt,
one teaspoonful of baking powder, one
large teaspoonful of lard, one egg, nearly
half a pint of milk. Sift together the
-four, sugar, salt and baking powder.
Rub in the lard cold and add the beaten
egg and milk. Mix into a dough just
stiff enough to handle. Flour tho board,
turn out the dough h, give it one or two quick
kneadings to complete its quality, roll it
out with rolling pin to half an inch in
thickness; cut with sharp knife into
squares the size of soda crackers, fold
each in half to form a triangle, and bake
on hot griddle for eight Or ten minutes.
Brown on both sides.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1888-06-22
CHICKENS FRIED WITH SALT PORK.

After very tender chicken is cleaned
and cut up, roll the pieces in flour sea
soned with salt and pepper; slice half
pound of fat salt pork in thin slices, put
it into frying pan and fry brown; then
take it up and keep it hot; put the chick
en- into the drippings and fry it brown.
When the chicken is brown cover it with
boiling water, season the gravy palatably
with salt and pepper, let it boil for a
moment, and then serve IKE CHECKED with
fried pork on the sauce dish, sending the
gravy to the table in a bowl