, 1888-03-22
LIES OF THE LINEMAN.
THE WEATHER CLERK NO LONGER
THE CHAMPION PREVARicAToR.

the Tencments.
"The public are way OH when they think
that the weather clerk is the champion
liar Of the world" said keen eyed and
Intelligent man with u kit Of tools in his
hand who had just been chased from an
east side tenement by an angry woman
armed with broom and a kettle of hot
water 81 am quite sure that can outlie
the weather cock any day, and there are
several hundred men in the city who are
just as proficient"
"Will you tell me where this remark.
able band of men Is to be found''
son the housetops."
'Do they 20 there to lie'"
"No, they lie to go there"
"What do they do when they get there's"
ooh, they string telegraph, telephone,
electric light, and all other kinds OF wires,
am II lineman, and the men speak OF
are all in the same business. I will tell
you all about il IL you will promise to
make the public understand that we are
not morally or legally responsible for the
lies we tell The high toned officers Of
tae companies wc serve are responsible.
/ never told more than n dozen lies In my
life until became II lincman Last year
i figured out that | averaged G6-30j
WIbIbINT> per uUN. HOW tllU I so ~!
Well, | kept count of nll the ibs, fancy
and plain lies, and whuppcrs that told.
Here il my memorandum. According to
our arithmetic IL takes ten iibs to make
one plain lie, ten plain lies to make one
fancy lie, and ten fancy lies to make one
whoppcr.
An EXPLANATION.
'That was the way | prepared the
schedule on New Years day but don't
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mendiup n neiubbor', roof and that his
trans are sealed. W. gtt upou the roof
quite often by this scheme. which we cali
n fancy lie.
.The plain lie is also pretty effective.
This Is when we 20 10 u house and say
that "A wire charged with electricity and
passiny over the roof has broken and
fallen. We ALWAYS insinuate that there !,
danger Il will set fire to the house, and il
is a mighty sharp woman or man whu
can stand ~ after that. When we are In
a hurry we simply walk up to IA house and
saw that we have been ordered by the owner
To nut I'm a district messenger box for the
occupant free of charge. That whoppef
settles IL nine times out of ten I never
saw "A woman refuse To yet something for
nothing After we have run the wire
over the house we come down and say
that we can't finish until the next day
We never make more than one attempt on
one house. In tn. first place il would
pronsc suspicion, and in the second place
il doesn't make any difference t. us what
house we get on in any block Once on
roof we can run all over the block. and
have many a. time mt II wire on the houas
of Il woman who had refused olct me up.
Most of these women don't know to this
oay that got ahead of them
PEOPLE or THE ,rrNFNENTS
..,rb. funny tbino about tha ,rn,,bI, We
bo,a thn, thn ,oI,nlo H., tho f,.binr,hi.
Iistrirt. a. nnt liicl mir co mucb nho,,,
u,, ,vir,s 81. tbn ncorIn in tho tansmoni
t,,,s,, ,I,,,,io,. ,rLn. - a., ,.iu ~, ,,ic. II,
EiSth nvn,,,,. - f,,nc> lie ,n nny of the mr.
tnu, c,,,.'. st,.oots ,TJ - rl.in IL. IN nosi
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