Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1888-08-31
MATEIMONY IN TEg Wild WEST.
A wYoMTya wEnnIYn.

Tho couple appeared, followed by
crowd Of the citizens of the camp. The
candidates stood up before the old
squire, who said:
Publications., this var man an
this var woman have appeared before
this court to be hitched in the legal
bands of wedlock If any galoot in the
mob knows of anything that mout
block the game ef TUX to a higher
court, let him now loot his bazoo, or
else keep his jaw to himself now and
furevermore. All in favor o. me pro-
ceedin' as authorized by law say i. I"
Everybody said Il"
Contrary, no."
Nobody said mo"
The motion Is carried unanimously,
an the court rules that thar hain't
nuthin' to prevent the tryin' of the case.
Grip your fms" The candidates joined
hands. Amos Peabody, do you sol
emily sw'ar tibet you'll freeze to Mandy
fureyer an ever? Thet yen love 'er,
and peryide fer 'er, an treat 'er square
an white, accordin to the rules and
regulations sot down to govern such
cases i'll the laws o the United States,
so help you God?"
Yaas, sir; / do, sir"
"That fixes your end o. the bargain.
Mandy Thomas, do you solemnly swa'ar
tibet ven hang on to Amos for all COM
in time; tibet yen nuss him in sick
ness and be square to him in wellness !;
tibet yell be TO him a good true, hon
est, up and up wife, under the penalty
prescribed by the laws for the punish
ment of sich ofl'enses; do We swa'ar this,
80 help you God ?"
Il swaar ! will"
Then by the power in me vested as
Justice O the Peace, in an fur this
precinct, | pronounce you, Amos Pea
body, husband, an you, Mandy Thomas,
wife, an legalize We to remain as such
now and fmevermore; an yen stand
committed till the fees an costs in the
case be paid in full. an may God have
mercy on your souls, aud bless this
union with his heftiest blessin's."
The fees and costs were adjusted,
and after receiving the congratulations
Of the assembly, the newly made hus-
band ard wife departed for their cabin
up the creek.
TYING THE KNOT IN NEBRASKA.
A newly elected justice of the peace,
who had been usel to drawing up deeds
and little else, was called up to marry
a couple in haste. Removing his hat,
he remarked: Hats off in the presence
Of the court All being uncovered, he
proceeded: Hold up your right hand.
You, John Maxim, do you solemnly
swear, to the best of yer knowledge an
belief that you take this woman to have
and 20 hold for yerself, yer heirs, exec
yrters, administrators, and assigns, for
yer and their use forever?"
81 do" answered the groom,
promptly.
You, Alice Evans, take this yer
man for yer husband, ter have and ter
hold forever, an you do solemnly swear
that yer lawfully sized in fee simple an
free from all incumbrance, and have
good right to SELL bargain, an convey
to said grantee yerself, yer heirs, adj
mnistrators, and assigns?"
L do do" said the bride, doubt
fully.
MARRYING IN ARKANSAS.
The bridal party moved with steady
steps and stately grace to a position in
front of the magisterial altar Squire
Barry arose, code in hand, and cleared
his throat for grand splurge into the
regulation marriage service. Slowly
and with unusual emphasis he pre-.
nounced the words until he reached the
closing clause, Il pronounce you man
and wife. Before the magic word:
had fallen from his lips the bridegroom
gasped, "Hol' on dar, boss; lem me kiss
dis gall" Then began scene that
caused the crowd to roll upon the fiool
! with laughter. Brown met with VIC
lent resistance from "dis gall" who evi
IDENTIFY had no undue fondness for pub
lie osculatory exercise. A regulat
scufile ensued, the fnality of which wa
that Brown got Adeline's head bacl
against the wall, and their lips met Will
a resounding smack All was over.