, 1888-12-06

BREW. Got that?"
Yes. 60 on. B.l'u.e."
"B-r-e-w"
Whats that. 'B' or 'G'p"
"B."
"Ehp"
Brewery"
well, what about it?"
us that the breweryp"
mo, this is Doolittle & Nothing"
You ring the bell and demonstrate
with the young lady at the central, who
cuts you of by ringing up somebody else,
and .ityo,, yo1 Try again.
''Hsllo.''
''ls that the brewery"
Stand little further from the tele-
phone"
You stand little further and repeat as
above, and there is faint "Yes."
rs johnson therep'
johnson.
''Spell it,"
OF course you spell IL with all the trim
mings, and while the cold perspiration be-
spanales your brow, the phone declares in
q faint, far-sway voice:
He left here last week"
"Do you know his addressp"
CUT OFF.
You hear your interlocutor ask somebody
whom you suspect is in the room with him:
do you know where johnson is work."
Ding! You are cut of.
You ring again, and carefully boning
your icea OF concommitant swear words
out of your regard for the sex. YOU inquire
in tone that warns the wire:
Central! What in the -. What did
you cut me of forp Please give me 510."
Five hundred ten is busy" chirps
back the silvery voice Of lovely woman.
You wait. When you at last re-establish
tho train OF thought, you are told: "John.
sons addressis 1900 and z.z.zz-z.z street"
1t is now your turn, and you say:
"WhatP" and also advise the other party
not 10 speak 80 loud.
Thirteen z-z-z zz street."
"Spell it,"
"T-h.i.r."
II get the thirteen all right, but don't
catch the rest OF it."
The shift changes at the other phone,
and new voice demands: Nov, what
10 it you want, enyhowP"
'Johnson's address"
Thirteen z.z.z street."
"Oh, blank Johnson's address!' And
the party of the second part hangs his
phone on the hook, and declines 10 be Sc
duced into any further psrley.
THE SCENE CHANGES.
Now you are indignant In real, sure
enough earnest. You feel that forbearance
you dislike bringing down unpleasant con.
sequences upon the head of the young
lady. who cut you of that time, You srernly
resolve that she shall suffer. You know
that by calling no No. 10 you will have
justice and more than justice done. Your
mental picture Of 76--that mysterious tel.
ephone tribunal or person against whose
sympathetic tympanum beat the woes and
the wrongs of several hundred people
daily-is that he has many points Of re-
semblance to the conventional marauder-
the miscreant you see upon the stage.
You fancy him hard, cold,
cruel man, OF a piratical and
violent turn OF mind, who has banker
ing for trouble and q zest for debate. You
imagine him one who will as O personal
kindness to subscriber discharge the
orphan daughter of line of widows upon
a cold and unfeeling world. and II the ex-
igencies Of the case demands II. who will
come around and kick your telephone
box into kindling wood in order to save
you trouble and expense. ifHse'f
sm l9 'N'. "No. 49," -
That IL the '76 myth" a. IL is present in
the minds of nineteen out of twenty. So
you frown and say TO yourself: "Well,
now, Ill just show her. Perhaps she will
not monkey with the buzz saw while In
motion onoe more You call up 20 and
you state your case. which 10 received with
such grave confederation and such synpa-
thy that you feel sorry and remofseful.
You are afraid he may go too far. You
don't want the poor girl discharged. but
just reprimanded, 90 after thinkine Il
over you put on your hat and 10 up 10
mo: 76" TO mollify him and mitigate bis
wrath; You call At the Office and inquire
II ann No. 76," remarks gentleman at
desE. You look at him and try TO realize
Wtll 8. Norman. - .the general man
and harmless looking young man A. eve, sver
syupa1hiSad With ind}0nafion 4. -