The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1888-11-07
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

A stowaway--The glutton.
All for protection Policemen
Our horticultural fathers-Poppies.
A pointer on pork-The pigs nose.
Oriental calendar gastronomy-Eating
dates.
A call eposit-Talking into a phono-
graph.
Man has his ups aud downs-Er, yes
hic-ups
A friendly meeting Gathering Of
Quakers.
T. he Lick Observatory-T postage
stamp window.
The best way to get at the tongue of
bell is to peal it.
Baseball clubs that have "Jonah'
are easily whaled.
Right kind of girl for restaurant
One that is tasty"
All good swimmers are not belligerent,
yet they strike out right and left.
A criminal may not believe in his own
guilt, but he is always open to conyic-
tion.
Make q man your travelling companion
and you must put up with him.-Pica-
yune.
When an office goes out to seek man,
it has to pick its way through crowds
-Lpoch.
This Banana Trust will be nothing
more nor less than skin game.
RJcheder Post.
Some bellies captivate with artless
heart; others with heartless art.--Her-
ctdnt 1rd e!er.
The hen that Matched out brood of
seven roostcrs was very proud OF her
beautiful sop-set.
Speaking of pins, the most costly
are the diamond pin and the terrapi1.-
! I'ittsjurg Caroaicte.
People studying the language of Fin
! land have quite au exciting time at the
! Finnish. .-hrchester Post.
In Denmark, girls are trained to agri-
! culture, but in this country they take
moro kindly to husbandry.
A Philadelphia umbrella firm has sus-
pended with nothing laid by for the
rainy day. --Pitts.uy Chronicle.
A fisherman will always be found
reeling Il great deal when the fishing is
good. Perhaps it is the bait. = Boston
Post.
When young men and maidens go out
canoeing together their thoughts are
sailing to the port of canoebial fe-
! licity.
Photographer Everything is ready.
pleasc slnile.n l. Eentuckian--' THANK
you. / don't care if l do. "--Arcola
Record.
1t hurts man just about as much to
burn him in eiligy as to have his shadow
on stone wall butted by goat.
Toledo B'ade
sYes.n said Mr.. Knowitall, 'sthat is
Latin for deep sea bass Basso pro-
fundo was Julius C,esar's favorite fish. D."
Hsrper's Bdsar. 'Ao'
The Bee Line Railroad has III crooks
in it. A bee which can't fly straighter
than that had better invent compass.--
Detroit Frse Press.
eyes" said Mr.. Newpop, .l'm
head of the firm down town, but when
I'm at home nights I'm floor walker
most of the time"
They tell us that "wah' is an Indian's
most common expression Of pleasure.
And here we've been thinking that an
Indians wah-whoop meant bloodshed.--
BiaghdHlptOn Rspm,ticaa.
Young Mother displaying baby
'Isnt he a great noble fellow, Ma ori"
Major anxious TO please) -"Yes indeed,
madam; why, he has got hands and feet
on him like hired man's. N-Neso York
Sun.
Tommy -'You ought to see how much
butter my step-mother puts on my
bread.n ,Iohnny-"l guess it's some of
this bogus butter, and she just trying it
on you before she eats any OF it herself"
-- Fiiegead Biaetter.
Willie took the shiny musket
BY It's muzzle, daintiiy.
Stuffed tho cold steel down his throatet
Toyed with trigger gracefully.
Down went hammer on the caplet,
''Up went Wiiliem did You sayi
Not a bit; for gun not loaded
Can not hurt boy at play
! Brown--"Have you seen Robinson
recently, Dumley2" 81 hear he has
been sick - lumley-"Yes, | saw him
this morning." Brown-''IIow is heln
Dumley-"By thunder l forgot to ask
him. Just said How are you, old manf
and passed - Tine.
In the spring the young mans fancy lightly
turns 20 thoughts OF love;
| Through the summer days he wooeth like the
hghtsome turtle-dove;
And when snmmer-tid is over in the genial
glow of autumn,
| Home the maiden writSs TO pepper, Dearest
pa at last I've caught him.
-Bdsdr
The citizens of Lexington were much
! surprised on Tuesday morning last to
fad plaeard on the public well which
read; ''Drink no water fom this we'll;
! il is full Of frogs, by order Of the Mayor.
! Mayor w. Il. Lester was sought by
/ reporter 10 ascertain way he had ordered
the well filed with frogs, but he declined