The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1888-01-03
THEY DID NOTHING BUT STEAL.
And Some of Them Passed Themselves
Off for Noted Men.
Fred Carruth in Chicago Tribune


"Can we water our mules here!" asked
Briar of a sad-looking man who was trying
to drive a nail into the fence with a stone,
near house not far from Gordon, Neb. 1t
was on the direct trail over which thous-
ands of settlers going to Western Nebraska,
Dakota and Wyoming had been travelling
for the last year or so.
~ have NJ objections" replied the man
as he dropped the stone, put his thumb in
his mouth, and looked panied.
Your well is very handy" continued
Briar with an engaging smile. Isuppose all
! movers on the road stop at it. Water seems
to be scarce in this region"
Hammers and monkev-wrenches, and
water pals and tin cups and eggs and chick
ems and bout ev'rything else must be scarce
in this region too, reckon" returned the
man gloomily.
''What makes you think so p
81 jedge by the way you fellers goin'
through in covered wagons steal 'em. I've
bought three new hammers this summer
and still have to drive a nail with a stone
and my wife tacks down the carpet with
the Stove-lfter."
do the boys steal"
Steal" echoed the man as he picked up
the stone and gazed at his thumb, "they
don't do nothing else but steal! Each ham
IlleF JOS disappeared INSIDE OF d week. lQe1
I've lost two water-pails and have to water
my own bosses now in a tin pan. I'll bet
they've logged off a good dozen tin cups
Last week | caught Teller climbn' into his
wagon with nv monkey wrench and he
drove off laughin and shallin' his fist at me,
and l couldn't catch him either. Day be
fore yesterday lent my ak to a man that
had broke down, and when he got
his wagon fixed he drove off and took
ha with him The sauna dav in
the afternoon, big Missourian come long
that had busted something, too and threat
ened to lick me cause | told him | didn't
have no ak. He said he bleve1 had one
and wanted to know if | was 'fraid he'd
steal my old AK. He said he could pound
any man that had got an idee he was a mis-
erlble sneak thief. | went into the house TO
git rid of him, and he took my buggy whip
out of my wagon and drove away with it
They've stole our eggs all summer and nave
got all the chickens except two old hens
that roost on the ridge-board of the house,
and I caught one Teller that was canped
near by tryin' to climb the lightnin' rod
one night and git at them, too. Yesterday
morning a man that was going through to
Wyoming stole the clothes line, and my
wife caught another trying to get our cat
into q covered basket and lug it off. Then
it's solemn gospel fact that | came out in
the afternoon i'll broad daylight and caught
a big, red-headed cuss IRON Iowa lifting on
the pump! Yes, sir, tryin' to snake it out
of the well and load it in his wagon"
you've had a hard time of it," said
Brian, consolingly.
Eyes, but I'm goin' to watch 'em after
this. | see your partner there a-sizin' up
| the grindstone out o the back end of the
wagon, but it won't do him no good, cause
| I'm goin to stay right out here and watch
you both till you drive on"
We fingered some little time to talk with
this Nebraska sufferer. ut beats anything
| ever SEEM continued the gloomy indi-
vidual, "the amount OF gall a man arays
| has when he's traveln' West in a covered
! wagon. They've got the gall over crab
| apple tree agent. Last spring big raw
boned cuSs from Missouri, with team of
mules as poor S whip-er wills, turned up 20
water, like you fellers. He had his wife and
| six tow-headed young uns in the wagon,
and three dogs and spotted COW behind
While he was pumpin' the
water he began to 'buse the govern
ment for not fixin' the road. He seemed
to think it orter provide big national
highway, all tlTnpiked up and trimmed
with shade trees just for him to move West
o.. / stood up for the country, and says |:
4 think the government does pretty well
for you when it makes you free gift of 100
acres of land, if it don't fix the road Yah,
free gift nothing, says he, as he put my pail
into his wagon mighty careless like; the
lands jes' as much mine as 'tis the gove'n-
ment's! How in blazes does the government
happen to own all this ere landr wy
saws l, them old revolutionary heroes fit,
and bled, and died, and hove Off tho yoke of
England and set up the government, and all
this land jes' naturally fell to 'em. You're
under big oblergations to all them old
fellers that fit the reverlution SOS you
could be free Don't talk to me That
way,' says he; I don't owe 'em cent, not
a red! Their old rev'lution never done me
no good; my ancestors had a revlution Of
their ownr Where" says |. In Missouri,
OF course says he; licked the English and
finished up ev'rything in 100, fore them
other old mossbacks bought their guns.
We set up our government right in Mis-,
souri,, and all this country belonged to us
Then you must "a been annexed 10 the
United StatesH says /. ''Nexed nothingp
says he I'VE 'nexed them and give en- this
land. and now they're sota round makiA'
, a great shcutia' ro4t SlrlA' o4e u Is