Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1888-07-21
AT A WEDDING.
The Heal lnwardneSs Of q swell Eng.
lish Wedding.

lish Wedding.
| From Punch
scene-Intsrior Of church. wedding guests ar.
| irving and exchanging airy recognitions as they
settle down in their places. Bridesmaids, in
various states OF circumstances collected at
| the door. Loud and sustained buzz Of feminine
| whispering.
| PoIce.nan ION guard at another door, to people
WIN mania for seeiug complete strangers
married.: VERY sorry, ladies, but If you are not
| provided with tickets can't let you in"
| The people with a mania, &c.): "But this Is q
| public place, isn't it?"
| Policeman (not feeling competent to argue the
R point: THOSE are my orders" TThe people. &C..
,, verger 90 guests with pink tickets): "Any OF
PINK guests attempting to pass crimson
rope which bars the central PASSAGE: awe want
| 10 oe near The aitar-we can't see here"
! Nerger On superior manner: "The higher seats
are Set apart Ior parties with white tickets"
| Pink guests ito one another, Indignantly /:
"And after we'd sent that girl salad bowl, tool'
| guests who ought properly to have been ''Pink (,
remark that IT is the most shamefully- managed
wgaug tney ever saw, and recur bitterly at In
| tervIs 70 the salad how'll
Mrs; Ripplebrook (Sho always comes early "to
see the peopie,1-O. there1l be a tremendous
the De Lacy yespes have Just come in-what a
pity IL Is that eldest girl has such red nose she'd
Se quite g9od-looking without it! There's
NarclSSus Runderceed, you see him everywhere.
!Bows and smiles at him efusvely.) Horrid crea-
ture! And how TAT he's getting! DO you know
VINO bhat Is. TnatS Miss Mabel Maycup, OF the
| "Proscenium," you know-looks ever SO much
oder by daylight, doesn't she? i suppose she s
not one OF the brides friends! By the way, have
you ever met nlin-thS PilbergiIt man, the BRIDE
groom, mean? U, my dear, perfect horror! Ten
years older than she IS, and one hears such stories
about him! In fact, it was only his money that
but her people We're delighted OF course All she's
coming now look how the bridesmaids are all
a pess h ,d themselves! That's the bridegroom
Best man On whisper to bridegroom: "Pull
su n tosether Old chappie, you are looking so
| Briiegroom: 81 feel chippy, too Fact is those
suppers are mistake; I'll never give
Mrs. Ripplebrook: "Now the choir are going
uoWn 10 meet them. Don't you wish they'd Invent
new nyInn for weddings? I'm so tired of that
shc9 oae; There she is always think this Is
whether It's silk or suede gloves the bridesmaids
are wearing? That's her father whose arm she is
count. Her mothers behind, with the hook nose:
why on earth she should cry don't know-it's all
Rut uo h. Sne makes pale bride, doesn't she?
beauty. hear she threw over poor young Old
grove most shameiully. Why does that tiresome
oiq oishop humble SO? can't hear word"
Housemaid belonging TO brides family Ito
nurse: 81 wonder at that Lousil Jane taking on
herseli to cry, when she only came Toosday tort
cry" o ~ 0'''i- W
The nurse Qoftily): 'Tnem kitchen maids can't
OF them"
THE vEsTRY.
"eherai congratulations, compliments kisses,
and signatures
bridegroom TO best mani: 81 say, dear boy,
loon 10 You To square all these Johnnies, you know
(which is the irreverent mode designating the
pishop and his assistant cleryymen.J
IN CHURCH DURING THE INTERVAL
MIS-. hippieofook: Every daring OF them to be
narrieu In May, Isn't 1t? l knew girl who was
hiarried III May once-and the very first time they
gave dinner party, her cook came up drunk soon
aIter the salmon, and gave her warning before
everybody! Dreadful, wasn't It? suppose youlI
go on 10 the house and see the presents. Do-rm
ISL I IT! was going 20 get her quite an ordinary
one at the stores-but that was when / thought
sue va, only gong TO be Mrs. Oidgove. An,
GOMEZ" 0' AVN 'AN'
Bride and bridegroom pass slowly down the
6 6iar passage, recognizing their friends at
haZaru. several are left unnoticed with their
elAoofateiy prepared smile Wasting their sweet
nes9 on tGe brides brothers A young man rather
MtSIIgthtly dressed, VINO has been standing ueuind
MI. Rippiebrook the whole time, forces his way TO
The y. N. TO hlmself): "she shall see ne-if
Duct" ' - "-'0' Hei 0'H
Inc bride: "What, Mr.. Oldglove? Id no idea
hope"
lshe passes on, leaving the Y NJ. to think of all
the scathlhg replies he might have made.J
An on maid weeping In the gallery: she has
got IN as 1.-The oridegroom's aunt" a Character In
winch she attends every weddngl: ..Poor young
thihgS-to think OF ali the troubles b.for,, ihemin
,s ID iuegroon ilendS: pretty wedding, wasn't
go BRIDES friends: "Not pretty wedding, was
IN TIE CARRIAGE.
Bridegroom (fndins the silence embarrassinv,.
"Hope they'll give Us time enough TO change. and
ali that. Horr,d bore II we missed our train and
had TO watt"
BIT Bride: 10 If you are going to find everything
Bridegroom: "wel, isn't it?,
silence returns.
IN TUE DRAwISG-ROoM
tfreoehtS laid out; guests wandering round
keeping furtlve lookout for their own OFFERINGS
ana feeling deeply incensed II they are not promi
nehtly displayed Others consult the congratu
idtofy teIegraIlS as though they were OF EutOpaan
interest. a detective, noticeable by a sumptiI0uS
set-up and his uneasy bearing watches the lew
e ers snot-slga,ed Old gentleman Urlend of the
oridel approaches and, mislead by detectives les
laI azure, taxes hin for the Underground
ne ~ q. SWth enotion) This Is great
Responsibility you have Undertaken todIy sir I
hope you will be-al.-worthy or it,"
pct professionally sensitive): THANK you; but
nnI not tI Hs rrIt time I've undertaken sucn JOB
Inc > o. G. tmoving aghast: "ThIs is dreadful
are I6a can noty Show! how many times and where
mother. would my self-oniyOr "
lS,oes 10 search Of SOME champagne.J
he pifae iiiotaeF go gueSt): $50 kind OF Won To
remember my girl, and to send her that charninr
-tshe suddenly 'orgets whether she is speakinS5
10 the donor OF The nineteenth Carriage clock or
the fifteenth fsl slice) that charrnlng-erNrmnn.
ple)-qulte the pref tiest-er-(mumble)- ever saw
But you always have such taste"
MID surprise OF guest, conscious or having nre
sented In despair, plated toast rack OF unpreten
t10uS designl
Mr.. Oldglove (who has come on after alI-bitterIv
10 the Dfidel: "Ali | can wish you, Mrs.-(chOS
lhS)-MrS. Plioergllt, is that you may be happy
as-aS you deserve,n "PP'
The bride (sweetly): "Thanks awfulIy That's
the prettest thing I've had said to me Vet ~ ITo
nelghDor: 30, Mi. Cashley, how am L to thank
you?-that lovely platewarIner,
tMr. U. retIreS blfed, and coItemplates co,n
mltihS suicide with Il piece OF wedding cake,l
IN THE CARRIAGE.
The bridegroom: "Wel, that's oyerD
Bride Qcily): 81 wish you would contriye not tn
hdget so! :"
Bridegroom: "When a fellow has about a stone
and half OF rice down the back or his necS it
makes MIN rather restless. What are all the chan
pies staring at us for? I'm sure we don't look ne
newly married as all that.'
Bride (complacently): "You would not notice |
such TITLES; but Eulaie has really surpassed her
self over my going-away Dress
bridegroom: mo- by Jove, I'm hanged II it's |
that" - ="
Bride: 'Perhaps you think you are the attrac.
bridegroom: "spotted It as we passed that shon
Widow. Isay-er-Albinia, I'm not Joking-reap |
~ I'm not! There's q beast OF a white satin sim
per on the roof OF the broughamp
->O>-
Done by Sweet Girls.