The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1888-09-06
WISE AND OTHERWISE.

The boy who has the wood to saw is
ever ready to encourage any strivings
after muscular development on the part
Of his fellows.
Do not be induced to take some other
preparation when you call for Hoods
Sarsaparilla. Be sure and get Hoods.
which is peculiar.
Mr.. Thomas thinks it is one of the
most touching things in life to hear a
western hog singing to its youngest,
Theirs litter in the mire. baby mine. {"
An Irishman, who had very ragged
coat, was asked of what stuff it wa
made. "Bedadl don't know" saws he;
81 think the most of it is made of fresh
air."
A countryInan in Dalton was buying
his hrst glass OF soda water the other
day. As the foaming beverage was
haded to him he remarked: Il wish
you'd skim off the scum, boss. l amt
paying for no froth, you bet."
Fifty Years Experience have tested
the virtues OF DIR. Wistar's Balsam Of
Wild Cherry, and it is now generally
acknowledged to be the best remedy ex.
tant for pulmonary and lung diseases,
including consumption. Were it not
for its merits, it would long since have
died and made no sign"
Second class in grammar stand up"
said the schoolmaster, John is-who
does John correspond with?' Il know"
said little boy at the foot, holding up
his hand; "if you mean John Smithers.
he corresponds with my sister Susan"
What want to get at is the snimus
OF the transaction, said the Judge.
But, your honor, said the complain
ant, there wasn't any at all. He came
up quiet like, an grabbed the coat, and
was off with it before l saw what he
was at. No sir, there wasn't ANY muss. "
We have speedy and positive cure
for Catarrh, DIphtheria, Canker Mouth
and Headache,in SHILOH'S CATARRH
REMEDY. A nasal injector free with
each bottle. Use it if you desire health
and sweet breath. Price 80 cents. Sold
by j, T. Shurtltff.
II is understood that the following
pledge will be circulated for signature
among the journalist" of the daily
press:
Il hereby solemnly promise that
will never u-e the following expres SONS,
or any Of them, in my professional
work, and that VIII use all honorable
means to prevent their use 10y others:
Fire fiend.
Cast a gloom.
when the smoke Of the battle had
cleared away.
True facts.
The scene beggar5 description.
View with alarm.
Dull, siCkening Ehud.
Like the play Of Hamlet with Ham.
let lett out.
"Tumbled like an aspen.
Lap of luxury.
"Bive of industry.
White winged peace.
Fill a long felt want.
Hectic flush.
Grim reaper.
Throw oil on the troubled waters.
(Sigh herp)
The Journalists have heard OF the
proposed action, but have not yet de-
cided whether TO submit or strike
Brakes Magazine.
DIDN'T WANT A GIRL.
Last summer my wife's health was run
down, and she wanted me to hire n girl
to do the work. In little while |
found one | thought would suit her,
when to my surprise she said | need not
hire any one, as she felt much better,
and thought another bottle Of Sulph r
Bitters would cure her.
DONALD GREY,
Al Worcestr Square, Boston.
Metropolitan editor" Write an able
article carefully reviewing the topo-
graphy and population of Central
Africa, the dangers incident to travel
from men and beasts, give the line Of
Stanley's probable fate"
Assistant-"1 don't know anything
about it,.
Neither does anyone else. It's a
splendid subject for fine writing"
Professor (of class in iournalism)-
What is the difference between an edi
torial and an editorial paragrophy
Student--An editorial is of the same
nature as an editorial paragraph, but is
larger, and doesn't have as much to say
i Harper's Bazir.
HAY FEVER.
have been afflicted with hay fever
from early in August until frost. My
eyes would run stream OF water and |
snetzed continually. wac advised to
use Ely's Cream Balm. 1t has worked
like charm and can say am entirely
cured Mrs Emiline johnson, Chester,
Conn.
have been for several years a sufferer
from hay fever and severe head colds.
l have found nothing that can compare
with Elys Cream Balm, | would not
be without it for any consideration. Il
is simply wonderful in its effect upon
tho nasal organs.-[S, A. Burt, Will
mington, N. G.
sect yourself full of the subject
said the professor, 'Sllurate Yourself
with it, then your essay will write
itself" Eyes, know, professor, SAID
Miss Colespring, but my essay is on
Rum, the cause of - brakes Mag
azine.