The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1888-09-18

DoE'T ridicule the poor man who supports ten
or dozen dogs. Perhaps that's the only way
be has to keep pup.-Ierre Honte Express.
A SHAKEsPEAREAS STUDENT asserts that the
action. sort OF do Bill" as IL were.--Hd--
per's Bdzdr.
Mr.. VAN VAN alone, see, Miss Quilt.
Miss Ouilt-Yes
Mr. Van VI hate my own company.
Hiss Quilt-So do Time.
WE notice that q waterspout burst in Ken.
lucky the other day: A waterspout that would
go into business in Kentucky might expect TO
burst with no assets.-PeortG Transcript.
An economist exclaims that three cigars a
day will supply a family with meat. The
economist has evidently got his facts mixed.
He means cabbage.-B inghdmtop Republican,
BLINKs-Can't we get links to join our club?
MinkS-Jinl1s has never been clubman, but
guess he'll be willing to become q member in
a month or two. He was married last week.
Philadelphia Record.
PATIENT OLD LADY Ito elevator boy reading
dime novel-How often does the elevator 60
up, boy:
Elevator boy-It goes up at the end of every
chapter, ma'am.-Tin
ENJOYED your party, Bobby"
"Oh, awfully!'
We'll, what little girls did you dance with?n
"Oh. didn't dance | had three fights down
stairs with Willie Richardson, an l licked him
every tilHt. -Juuye.
THE STATE OF TIE CAsE.-I understand that
you have got baby at your house, Jack?
Nv no told you soy
Il heard it around in spots. Is it a mistaken"
Eyes, it is a mistake There is a baby there
but the baby has got us. ''-DrGie's Magazine.
SHABBY TREATMENT.-Railroad" oficial-I am
exceedingly sorry, but l cannot renew your
pass.
Citizen Gndgnantly)-Wh And I've had
q pass on your road for fifteen years! Is that
the way you treat old -Harper'S
Bazaar.
A-This country can't risk another war.
B-Why. we could put 100000 or 1900, COO
men into the field.
That's just it, and if the war lasted long
there would be such crop of veterans wanting
pensions that the treasury would be bankrupt
-IerGs SftiHQs.
THAT was contradictory sort of an effusion
written by discharged clerk TO his former en-
ployers;
SEPT. 1, 1888.
Rec 6 Doe:
GENTLEMEN-Youa are no gentlemen. Respect
fully yours, JOHN SMITH Hurper'S Bnznr
ENAMoRED YoUTH Crying to make a good i'm
preston on the girls father)-SeemS to me |
have seen you before, and at some public as
selnblage; must have been when was in the
city three years ago We're you taking an active
Old Gent-Yes; was a police magistrate
Philadelphia Record.
TRUE VILLAGE INsTINcTs.-Uncle Silas taking
his first trip on the elevat ID railroad)-Kinder
nice, amt it, Mandy, for these New Workers. to
ride home on stills this way? Beats patent
moving machine all hoiier.
Aunt Amanda-Yes; an they can look in the
winders and see what every one else in taown is
havin' for dinner.-Ju10e.
OLD MRS BENrLH-I might have been run
over to-day, Josiah, if a truck driver hadn't
kindly stopped 10 let me cross.
Old Mr. Bently- What stopped fer We?
Old Mrs. Bently-Yes, an said: ''Gwan
accrost, We oud bag O bones!' | thought it
was polite in him.
Old Mr. Bently-Yes, he must have been po-
lite.-NetC York sur.
WALT WHITMAN, the good gray poet, is still
confined to bis room and cannot walk, but ex-
poets to recover his usual health. which is not
very good. before long. He considers his recent
attack Of paralysis the fifth that he has had
since the war He retains mis- cheerful spirits
and proves that pluck and poesy sometimes 20
together.