The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1888-10-05
TAXING A HUSBAND.

consecTated GROUND b the coEiioretess
wido,Yer began to search for a partner 10
make good her less.
Such was. however. the unfortunate
reputation which Tim had acquired, both
for severity Of temper and for ~tightDessin
holding the pursestrings, that no lady in
the town Of SvanyilIs e0uld be found SUI
fciently anxious for matrimonial felicity
to unite her lot with his.
Timothy O'Brian was not q man to be
easily discouraged, and II q wife was not
to be found in Svanvilie, the world was
wide and women were plenty elsewhere.
He had occasion 10 go to Boston to pro
cure supplies for the grocery from which
he derived his support: and in Boston he
found q lady TO his mind who was not
sufficiently acquainted with his pecaiilri-
ties TO reject his suit.
When OtBrian brought his bride home
it viii readily be supposed that the Cos
sips of Syanville lost little time in max
ing her acquaintance. and very little more
in informing her of her husbands reputa-
tion.
Mrs. O'Brian smiled At all that wastold
her. tossing her head a little at the story
Of the beatincs meekly received by the
three former wives, and pursuing up her
I E IDS as II 10 iGllGltttNC tt8tt ~ANt A-AS AtAtAAAr
had no notion whatever of submitting TO
any SO ungallant conduct.
It was not very long before her fortitude
was put o the test. The bride announcedto
her husband that il was highly becoming
and proper that they make some return
FOR the attentions shown them, and that
she contemplated nothing less than 4 tea
party.
Surprise for 4 momen held O'Briansil-
ent. such an innovation was so astound-
ing rs fairly to deprive him Of the power
Of speech. He quickly recovered it. how
ever, and swore that he would be neither
dictated 10 By his wife, nor ruined by her
extravaganza
The lady. instead Of attemptingt TO allay
the rising storm, did all in her power TO
provoke him still further; and it required
o tmuch TO bring him to- towering rage.
From words he was ready topassto blows.
Selling Il bamboo cane, which had proba-
bly, served him for 4 similar purpose with
each Of his former helpmeets, lie prepared
to administer TO his bride q sound casti-
cation.
stop said the lady, producing q
c~arving-bnife and editatively examining
its edge. 1T was not in the marriage
contract that I should he fogged by You;
nor do l intend to be. If we cannot live
together, we'll separate, but youshan not
strike NE"
Very well, very well" he returned,
with an cath as long rs his cane. Pack
NJ your things and he of then. You may
have your ~tea-party in Boston,
Like the discreet woman she was, hrs.
O'Brian made no reply to this sally, but
went quietly to work TO gather such
things about the houseas belongedt TO her.
Her possessions had been brought 70
Swanyille in . huge trunk, large enough
20 contain a couple of men; and this she
now opened to replace in it her goods.
Timwas Ike all penErious mortaIs, very
suspicious, and lie greatly feared lest his
departing spouse should bear aEay with
her more than she had brought. He
therefore stood over the trunk to examine
each article as it was put in.
The lady spread upon the bottom OF the
trunk some bedding. Tim stopped over
TO be sure By actual examination that it
was ali hers. and the la6ytoOk advantage
Of the movement 10 trip hisheels and send
him hcadlong into the trunk himself.
Before lie had fairly time 70 realize what
lad happened the lid was closed andlocked
over him.
The oaths which Tim O'Brian sgTore
when lie found himself fairly caced were
enough 10 entail upon him a thousand
years Of p~urgatory az the very leastifthey
did lot send him 70 a worse place alto
Cetaer. He raved, he reared, he attempted
70 break the lock, hestrurgled andfUmed;
but all 10 no purpose. The trunk wa
iron bound, ard held its ~ staunchily.
Il shall smother he yelled, with a
kick NJ the trunk.
"0h, no, l3vev,' replied histenderwife,
"you viii breathe through the key-hole.
Afaneral is more expensive than a tea
party, you know
"IlI kill you when I get out, you Jeze-
bel, you bag, you-
You are not ont yet, dear" she inter
posed rs lie paused for 4 word sufficiently
strong. Don't excite yourself. love. l
hope you won't be lonely, sweet, but l
must get ready Tor nay tea-party. Good
By, darling Jimmy"
Such creamy custards, such melting
tarts, such spicy cake, rs were that day
~concocted in the house of Mrs. Timothy
O'Brian were for years 4 tradition in
Swanville. Such brewing and baking,
such compromising Of dainties inviting to
the eye and delightful TO the palate, had
certainly never before been known in the
town.
Mrs. O'Brian proved herself q woman
of energy, and fully equal 10 theoccasion.
Before the sun stood overhead the gossips
had all been hidden to tea that afternoon,
the preparations were well forward, and
!. the lady had caused TO be transported from
the grocery to the house certain supplies
which she had il vain asked Of her hus-
band.
The afternoon came and with it the Cos
sips. The event OF a tea partyat Timothy
O'Briau's was Of sufficient Importance TO
prevent tie absence Of any one; and in
so1ne mysterious way they felt that some
thing was likely to occur OF unusual in
teIest.
The hostess met her guests smiling and
serene. Never bad she appeared more at
her ease. The time passed quickly and
pleasantly until tea time, when the ladies
were ushered into the room where stood
the great trunk.
Il know you will pardon me, ladies'"
the hostess said in her graceful, easy man
ncr, that l have gratiicd 4 Whim Of my
own and used this trunk for a table. My
grandmother had her Wedding breakfast
upon it, then my mother did the same to
initiate her, and l like to keep up old GUS
toms. Wewill call thisthe bridal feast"
The guests expressed themselves
charmed with so novel an idea, and in
the highest spirits sat down to the bounti-
full meal provided for them.
The good cheer and fra0rnnt tea soon