Southern standard. (McMinnville, Tenn.) 1879-current, 1888-02-11
FULL OF FUN.

day, hired; Tuesday, tirel; Wednes.
day. fred. -Newark Sunday Call.
"A bride is ALWAYS becoming to
Boniface, and a bonny face is always
becoming to q bride. Hotel Mail.
First Young Lady-'I see that Mr..
Buffalo's profits in London amounted
to f70 000." Second Young Lady
eyes, and think, too, of his position in
society. Ut Bits.
-Chasinga bull across soft swamp
is the kind Of agricultural pursuit that
even the independent farmer does not
relish. Pack
Martha. said her father will
lam asked me for your hand last
night. and I consented" well, pa,
that is the first bill of mine you haven
objected to-"
ibid the wedding 60 of smooth
Typ about as smoothly as such af-
fairs always 60 off The only hitch
that occurred was when the pair stood
up to be united. boston Courier.
Miss Spinster- Really. Mr.. o Id
boy, you are so kind" Mr.. Oldboy--
Don't mention it, Miss Spinster. ]
dance with you, you know; because the
Others are too young for man of my
years"
Only One Condition-First Old
Maid-"Sarah! Sarahr' Second Old
Maid-"What do you wsntp" There
a burglar In the house." Tell him IL
he amt already married I'll take
him."
This ere animal" said show.
man, '.is a leopard. The ancients
thought he couldn't change his spots
but it's now known that he sleeps in
one spot one night. and in another
spot the next night, and is all the time
a changin' his spot IN Y Ledger.
Town lot man. you see these are
not boom prices, There is no boom in
our lots, but steady, healthy growth. "
STANDARDIZATION they won't do for
me. What l want is an unsteady,
unhealthy growth, so that can double
my money in month" ..,-.r.r.
Say, bub. hear that your folks
are going to have conversation club
at your house this winter" Yep; we
got one" who are the membersp'
We and mother. furnish the con-
versation and mother provides the
club. Emmy moreP"--Detroit Ere,
Press. .Ir. -4a. ... s....ss
do you remember the text thi'
morning, BobbyP" inquired the min.
lister, who was dining with the family.
Yes sir. The last shall BIO first an,
the first shall be last" ''Ani do you
know what that meansP" II don
believe it means much. I'm never
first or even second; I'm always lat
said hungry Bobby. M y Sun.
"A Prudent Madden
She writes many letters unto mo
Breathing VOWS Of love 50 true,
And they're just Us sweet as sweet can be
But very prudent maiden She
For they all come postage due.
-Harper's Bazaar.
Celia" why do you encourag
attentions from both Tom and Harry
Irene "Well. dear, / like Tom best
/ but he is not very we'll off. and can
afford q coupe if we 60 to the theatel
: / call him my fine-weathcr beau.
Then what do you ca
/. Harryp" Irene-"My rainbow
Harper's Bazdr.
' Mamma" said PHILADELPHIA
j. girl, ''what would be all appropriat
present to give George? You kno'
/ we are not engaged yet" How lon
has he been calling upon you'" "Abol
two years" Then think a prett
plain hint will be the proper thing I
give him. Chicago Tribune.
) '-"And SO you are going to be mai
ried?7 Eyes; and l am so happy!
|. love Charles with my whole heart
t. Has he any property" "Ycs, b
lieye so. And as he isn't very well
;. permitted him to make a will in IN
}, favor" VERY good in him, I'm sur
But you have some property of you
!. own. Have you willed that
9, Charles?" What a ridiculous ide;
S, OF course not; but I've fixed it so tn
l. he can't get hold of it. Boston Ira
SCriDt