The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1888-03-21
BOWSER'S FIRE ESCAPE.
HIS DISASTROUS TRIAL OF THE
NEW APPARATUS.
Mrs. Bowser Describes Her W6rser
Hairs Latest Experiment-His
Ardor Cured by Fall.

The other afternoon an exptessman
delivered at the house several strr ,e
packages, and when Mr.. Bowser came
up in the evening he explained that they
were fire escapes.
What forlh
For the house, of COURSE"
But we don't need any fire escapes
on our house, Mr.. Bowser."
Don't we Well, we shall have
them Just the same. If you want to be
burned Ihave no objection, but propose
to die some other way"
You never said there was any dan
ger"
" Because didn't want to make you
nervous. As matter of fact | haven't
felt safe any night for year. :"
And now the danger will be obvi-
ated ~
1T will be reduced to the minimum,
certainly. Even if we wake up and
find our bedroom on fire we shall be able
to escape with only a scorch."
After supper he carried the parcels up
stairs. There were several bottles and a
couple ofwire racks, hand fire extin-
guisher, and rope and pully and other
stuff.
"Wbere would fire be likely to start
in the house?' asked Mr.. Bowser as he
was fixing a hook in the casing of our
bedroom window.
Down stairs probably"
"Well, we have front and back stairs,
and here are three chamber windows open.
ing out on veranda roofs. Couldn't we
escape by some of these ways" "
elf thought we could would | be fool
enough to go and throw away $50 on this
appa atas3" he angrily demanded.
IL suppo.e you know best
Mrs. Bowser, when | don't know best
| will resign. While you have never
given the subject of fire. escapes one sin
gle thought, | have devoted years of
study to it. Take our wall-cyed calling
and go down stairs, and when | want YOU
| will call "
In about an hour he called He was in
great good-nature. He had the hook
firmly in place, and hanging to it was a
rope and some sort of harne s.
at isn't much of an ornament to our
bedroom, ventured to observe.
"What has ornament got to do with
fire-escapes, Isn't your life worth more
to you than the daily presenne of tea
store chromo2 The escape is now ready. :"
''For whatl"
''To escape by, of course Here is
the situation: 1t is midnight. The cook,
while rumaging about in search Of her
lost quid of gum, has dropped lighted
matches under the front and back stairs.
The flames have been smouldering for
hours. They now break forth with sud
den fury, cutting off our escape from
either stairs"
"And we crawl out on the veranda
roofs.n
''Do WEI Not much! We start to do
so, but we find that all the verandas have
fallen to the ground, the supports hav-
ing been heaved out by the frost"
"Well?"
'Well, we awake with the crackle of
flames in our ears. While you wiring
your hands and declare that we are lost,
| calmly secure all the money, iewelry
and valuable papers and coolly make
preparations to escape. l calmly pull
down the rope and harness, seat you and
the baby therein, and the next moment
you are landed on the ground. / follow
just as the engines arrive, and the papers
of the next morning chronicle my won
derful self-possession in the face of awful
danger
And can you go down by that rope
and harness?"
Can II Can you chop wood with an
aXi What is it for except to go down
on9"
81 would almost as soon be burned up
as to try it. l don't believe you would
dare to go down on it."
''Mrs. Bowser, what a wife believes
and what husband knows are two diff
ferent things. Is it likely that | would
purchase this apparatus and put it up
here if | didn't dare use it, Shove up
that window"
'But wouldn't try it. You are rather
clumsy, you know3'
'Another INSULT Shove up that win
dowl"
put up the sash and he seated him
self in the harness. sat down on the sill
and grasped the rope over his head, and
with a look of disdain in his eyes he
swung himself Off. A wild howl rent
the air, followed by the thud of some
thing striking the earth, and | looked
out to see Mr.. Bowser lying in heap be-
low the window. | ran down and out
as soon as possible, and after seven or
eight minutes he was able to limp into
the house with me.
''Mr. Bowser are you much hurtp I
asked.
He glared at me but did not reply.
81 told you thought it dangerous. "
'Alrs. Bowser" he huskily began as
he Jumped down on the sofa, this is the
beginning of the endp'
''What do you meanP
81 mean you have made the last at
tempt on my life you'll ever have
chance TO! You bounded me for weeks
and weeks TO get this fre-escape, and
you meant my death by a fall"
"Why, Mr. Bowserp'
'Say no morel l saw it in your eyes
as you pushed me off the sill To-mor-
row we separatem
But when the morrow came he sneaked
up and removed the apparatus and
pitched it into the alley, and fire escapes
haven't been referred to since Detroit
Free PrtSy
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