The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1888-01-01
PERSONAL AND SOCIETY.
A Little Social Talk.

IN Issuing invitations to luncheons, teas, and
even evening receptions, a growing ten
de ncy the part of the hostess to use her call
ing-card has been the subject of remark. The
use OF a calling card for such purpose is not
good form. With but small additional expense
or trouble invitations for such entertainments
may be either written upon note-paper. or they
may be engraved for the occasion. No small
amount of ignorance and doubt is displayed by
many persons to what the requirem ents of
custom and good taste in the acknowledgment of
invitations Although it is proper to do SO, it is
not generally deemed necessary that an accept
ance OF an invitation should be sent to the host
ess. Invitations for breakfasts. luncheon, and
dinner. parties should be Immediately answered,
and with peremptory acceptance or regret. as
the hostess desires to know who
Is coming and who is not, that she may
arrange her table accordingly. One should
not write, saying that he will come, if he does
not have TO leave town." or that she will try TO
come" or. in the case as a married couple, tn at
'.one of them will come" After having
cepted dinner invitation, if illness or any
other cause interfere with your going. note
that the place at table may be filled by another.
IG has often marred the pleasure of a luncheon
or dinner party this hesitancy on the part OF
guest TO send in time to her hostess her regrets,
caused by the coming on of a cold, of a dea tn In
the family, or any other calamity. 1t should be
remembered that a luncheon or dinner is for.
of the greatest impo rtance to the hostess. 1t
is the highest soc ial compliment. and 1t
must be met in the same formal spirit In send
ing regret it is the practice OF some persons
TO write the word regrets" upon their calling
card. This practice is not good form, and
should rot be followed unless ii is desired to in
suit the hostess. The proper thing is to send
card without any pencing upon it, or to write
note. thus: ''Mrs Brown regrets that previous
engagement will deprive her Of the pleasure OF
accepting tho kind invitation to Mrs. Smith"
In the matter of accepting or refusing an invi-
lation one should economic his politeness.
1t is better to err on the other eide In extend
Ing the invitation the hostess has done her best
The privilege of ladies choosing husbands is
thus explained in work entitled "Courtship,
Love and Matrimony." printed in the year 1906
albeit it is powe become part of the common
lave, in regarde to social relations of life, that
often as every pissextile year doth return,
the lsdyes have the sole privilege, during the
time it continueth, OF making love unto the men,
which they doe either by wordes or 1ookes, as to
them it seemeth proper and, moreover. no man
will be entitled to the benefit of clergy who
dothe in any treate her proposal withe
slight contumely."
Benefit OF clergy" was the exemption from
punishment OF the clerical order land indeed.
Nil who could read and writel under the text
IL Chron., xvi, 22) Touch not mine
anointed, and do my prophets no harm
That a punishment exists, and that of
the most distressing kind, is made all too plain
by the note of warning sounded by willy old
bachelor in Notes and Queries, in January, 1896
Saws he: II am informed. by fair friend, that,
If in the course of the ensuing year 1S56-whlch
Is leap-year-she should so far forget herself as
80 suggest union between herself and bach
elor acquaintance who should be uncivil enough
TO decline her proposals. she could, thereupon,
demand from him the gift of new silk dress.
But to claim this dress with propriety, she
must, at the time of asking, be the wearer of a
scarlet petticoat, which, or the lower portion of
which, che must exhibit to the gentleman, who.
by the law of leap-year, is compelled to present
to the lady the dress, that shall cover the petit
coat, and assuage her dspleasure at the reiec-
tion OF her proposals." and. beseechne his fell
lows to be on their guard, he advises, discretion
being the better part of vaior, that they flee
from the scarlet petticoat as from q pestilence.
IL is probable however. that the scarlet petit
coat is after thought. en- orodered the
original legend. Of which IL is part. The
learned DR.. Gotham Brewer, concerning the
origin Of this leap-year privilege that the ladies
propose. and. If not accepted, claim silk gown,
tells the following story. St. Patrick. having
driven the frogs out Of the boys was walking
aloag the shores of Loueh Neagh, when he was
accosted by ST. Bridget in tears, and
was told that q mutiny had broken out
10 the nunnery over which she pre-