Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1888-05-27

Little did B. Franklin wot that some day
the little start he made when he baited his
pin hook with good conductor and tapped
the low proved and believing nimbus with
his buoyapt kite and the pickle jar of
electricity thus crudely acquired would DO
the egg from which inventors and scientists
would hatch out system which could not
only eucircle the globe with messages swifter
than the fight of Phnbus, but that anon the
LIGHT Of dav would be filtered through
cloud of cables loaded with destruction sufti-
Gent for a whole army and the air be hiled
with death dealing dangling wires
| am not an old fogy, though L may nave
that appearance, and l rejoice to see the
world move on One by one Ihave laid aside
nv own encumbering prejudices In order to
keep I'D with the procession. Have L not
gradually adopted everything that would IN
any way enhance my opportunities for ad-
vancement, even through tedious evolution,
from the paper collar up to the finger bowl,
eyether and nyethers
To return, however, to the subject OF cleo
tricity. 1 have recently sought to fathom
the Hyle and motif of new system which is
TO be introduced into private residences,
hotels and police headquarters. In private
houses il will be used as burglars welcome.
In hotels it will take the mental strain OH
the bellboy, relieving him also of portion
of mis- burdensome salary at the same time.
In the police department it will do almost
everything but eat peanuts from the corner
stand
The system is on exhibition in a large room
downtown. with the signals or boxes on one
a. ciafo Or station
on the other. By walking from one to the
other. a distance in all Of thirty or forty
miles, was enabled to get slight IDEA or
the principle.
Ii is certainly very intelligent system L
never felt nv own inferiority any more than
] did in the presence of this wonderful inven-
ton. 1t will do almost anything, it seemed
TO me. and the main drawback seems to be
its great versatility, for it thereby becomes
so complex that in order to become at all in
innate with it policemen ought to put IN two
years at Yale and at least year at Leipsic.
An extended course of study would thus per-
feet him in this line, but he would not then
be content to act as policeman lie would
want to be scientist, with dandruf on lis
coat collar and a far away look
Then, again, take the hotel scheme, for in
stance We go to dial which is marked
room 81 There we find that by treating it
in a certain way it will announce to the
clerk that room 81 wants a fire, ice water,
pens, ink, paper, lemons, towels, fire escape,
Milwaukee sec, pillow shams, New York
World, menu, Croton frappe, carriage, laun-
dry, physician, sleeping car ticket, berth
mark for same, Halford sauce, hot fiat iron
for ironing trousers, baggage, blotter, tidy
for chair, or any of those things In fact
have not given half the list on this barome-
ter because I could not remember them,
though may have added others which were
not on the indicator. The message arrives
at the Office, but the clerk is engaged in con-
versation with lady. He does not jump
when the alarm sounds, but continues the
dialogue Another guest wires the Office that
he would like a copy of The Congressional
Record
The message is filed away automatically, and
the thrilling conversation goes on Then No.
SIS asks TO have his mail sent up. No. %
wants to know what time the bus leaves the
house for the train going east, and whether
that train will connect at Alliance, O., with
q tide water train for Cleveland in time to
catch the Lake Shore train which viii bring
him into New York at 7:30, and whether all
those trains are reported on time or not, and
if not, viii the Office kindly state why's Other
guests also manifest a morbid curiosity
through their transmitters, but the clerk
does not get excited, for he knows that ell
those remarks arc fled away in the largo
black walnut box at the back of the offica.
When he gets ready, provided he has been
through q course Of study in this brand Of
Business, he takes one room at 4 time, and
addressing a pale young "BaniSter Polishern
of the name of ''Front," he begins
to scatter information, baggage, towels,
morning papers, time tables etc, all over
the horSa. Ii il also supposed TO be a great
time saver Fer instance, No. IS wants to
know the correct time. He moves an indi-
Gator around like the combination Of q safe,
reads few pages of instructions and then
pushes button. perhaps Instead of ring
ing for a boy and waiting for him some time,
then asking him TO obtain the correct time
at the Office and come back with the infor1na-
ton, conversing with various people on his
way back and expecting compensation for it,
the guest can ask the Office and receive the
answer without getting out Of bed. You
leave a call for a certain hour, and at that
time your own private gong will make it so
disagreeable for you that you viii be glad to
rise Again, if you wish tollnow the amount
of your bill, you so through certain exercises
with the large barometer in your room; and,
supposing you have been at the house two
DAYS and have had fire in your room three
times and your bill is therefore S1S2. IS. the
answer viii come back and be announced on
your gong as follows; One, pause. three
pause, two. pause, one, pause, eight When
there is a cipher in the amount / do not
know what the method is, but by using due
care in making up the bill this need not
occur.
This system is also supposed to keep its eye
peeled for policemen and inform the central
station where the patrolman is all the time;
also as TO his temperature, pulse, perspiration
and breath 1t keeps record ,of this at the
main ofiics on a ticker of its own, and the
information may be published in the society
columns of the paper in the morning.
Electricity and Spiritualism have arrived
at that stage of perfection where a coil of
wire and a can of credulity viii accomplish
great deal The time is coming when even
greater wonders Will be worked. and with
electric wires, the rapid transit trains and
the English sTarrows under the ground, the
dawn of a better and brighter day viii be
ushered in The car driver and the truck
man shall lie down together, Boston viii not
rise up against London, he that heretofore
Stag shall go forth no more 10 slug, and men
shall learn scrapping no more.-Biu Nye in
New York World
The Play on Words
A Brooklyn nan proposes TO import mon |
keys and train them to become boothlacllS 1
Would the public put up with such monkey /
Sftipgs