The Portland daily press., 1888-09-17
BILL TRAvER'S cHuM.
The Practical Jokes of the Late
Lawrence Jerome.


Lawrence Jerome, whose death was an
nounced the other day. was one of the oldest
members of the Union Club of New York,
and belonged to many racing clubs and as
sociations. He and his brother Leonard
founded Jerome park, and was concerned in
the Sheepshead Bay and other race courses.
He was great hunter and fisher. He
accompanied the expedition made up of
Sheridan, Belmont, j ohm Heckscher, Bennett,
and others that went west on hunting ex-
pedition for big game under the guidance of
Buffalo Bill. On that trip Mr.. Jerome shot
II buffaloes himself, One day Buffalo Bill
loaned him his horse, "Buckskin Joe," and
when they came upon herd of buffaloes Mr..
Jerome dismounted to fire and forgot to slip
his arm through the bridIe The horse turned
up week later, safe and sound, but with the
saddle underneath.
There are no end Of stories told Of his prac-
tical jokes, which are always funny, usual
ly extrayagant, and sometimes pretty hard
to bear for their victims 1t Is said that he
won his way into the good graces OF the En-
glish aristocracy by accompanying James
Gordon Bennett the younger in his yacht
Henrietta on that famous ocean race with
the Fleetwing and the Vesta. The Henri
eta landed them at Cowes, winners, and they
found English society eager to welcome the
heroes of the plucky voyage. Jerome had
the run OF the aristocracy, and 1t Is told that
he took advantage OF this to play joke at
the incidental expense Of the queen. He
visited Osborne, tho royal residence ON the
isle Of Wight, with one of his "blooded"
friends, and in one of the rooms Of the eagle
eye of the joker lighted on some of the royal
stationery. "Oh," he cried, raising his eye
TO heaven, ''if could only perchance have
one Of those crested sheets to take home to
America, how envied would | be there"
His friend thought the matter could be
arranged and soon the joker had his prize
Soon after this Mr.. Bennett gave a dinner
on his yacht to which number of English
men were invited. Mr.. Jerome had written
on the royal stationery an invitation to Law
renee K. Jerome to dine at Osborne with her
majesty, the queen, and arrange to have 1t
brought to him when the champagne had cir
culatec long enough to make the Englishmen
unsuspicious and credulous. As it happened
q real invitation from Lord Somebody was
handed to the joker just few moments be-
fore the arrival of the bogus one. He opened
1t, yawned and looked distraught. What it
lisp" asked some one.
"Oh, only an invitation from Lord So-and-
So" The Englishman started. Only an in
vitation! Then came the big envelope with
the royal seal and crest. The Englishmen
marvelled- Mr.. jerome sighed, and with an
Incompatible air of nonclahance cut the seal
and opened the precious missive.
WELL" he said, "this is getting to be
bore"
What was it? oh, an invitation from the
queen. An invitation from the queen bore?
Oh, well, she doubtless meant kindly, but
she didn't know how tired the American
was of these little social courtesies; they
were beginning to pail upon him. And so
for half an hour he ran on, and nearly drove
the astonished JOhnnies crazy. They never
suspected joke.
There was a couple Of Americans in the
party who could not quite make up their al
legged minds whether his letter was real or
bogus. They tried TO pump him, and he got
on his dignity right away. At length they
decided that he really was ON intimate terms
with the royal family, and as they were anx-
ious to visit Osborne, they asked him to give
| them the "open sesame" my dear bows"
| he said, there's nothing easier in the world,
The queen, God bless her, is dead struck ON
| American yachtsmen ever since we came
across the pond; All you have Ito do is to
put on your yachting clothes and march up
to the palace; AS Americans you will be
welcomed. Of course you win find some
soldiers at the gate. and they will present
| their bay0netS at your breasts but this n
| only matter OF form. Wave them away.
tell them you are American, and walk in.
They VIII cause you no further trouble"
The two simples followed these directions
only too well, and narrowly escaped arrest.
When they retured to reproach the joker he
met tnem with serious countenance. He
could not credit their story. "Why, | went
Ia tnat way" he solemly asseverated, 'and
dldnt have bit OF trouble. | went
tnrougn the queens private apartments.
Nor could they ever make him confess 9TH
erwise.
He was entirely impartial in his jokes, and
above all loved to work one on his particular
friend, w. j. Florence, the actor. Florence a
Capt. ConnOr of the st. James hotel, Ihom-
as T., Ochiltree of Texas President Arthur