Montgomery County sentinel., 1888-06-01
MisCellamenMs.
THREE YARNS FOR A PRIZE.

something of politician, has com
Portable place at Fork River, Barnegat
Bay, which is open the year round to
his friends for sport or recreation. The
late blizzard caught some of them down
there unprovided with means of indoor
amusement They were imprisoned
nearly II week, during which time a
small ale house was their only change
from the solitude of the lodge. One day
the crowd was yawning in the ale house.
All things had become chestnuts.
81 can tell you story about my dog
that's new, anyhow gaped Charles
Parker.
II can beat it for a prize" said Eb-
enezcr De Witt
"You fellows don't know how to
lie" put in A. j. Prime. at takes a
lawyer. | seldom lie myself, but if there
prize in it, go ahead
swell, this dog, gentlemen, began
Parker, loftily, 'beat any rabbit dog
that ever lived. He was faster than the
wind. Once ON hot trail, he ran his
nose up against scythe, which had
been left blade upright in u field lie
was going at a terrible pace, and knew
what would happen; SO | stopped down
BY the scythe in preparation. Sure
enough, the blade parted him down the
middle, dividing even his tail in equal
parts. AS the two parts tumbled over
| clapped them quickly together and
bound them up in hunting coat. He
was going so fast that the blood hadn't
time to spill, and of course the halves
grow together. But somehow one half
had Topped over just before | joined
them, and when Jack got well he had
two legs on the ground and two sticking
up in the air. lie was u curious dog
after that. When he barked half
bark would come from the part Of the
mouth that opened up, and the other half
came from the part that opened down.
This defect annoyed him, and he practiced
to remedy it. lie got SO after while that,
after choo-chooing for minute, like
locomotive getting under way, he could
run his half barks together into con-
tinuous note like fog horn. | made
money out of him by hiring him out
mornings to box factory for steam
whistle. The most curious thing, though,
was to see him eat. | cut his food into
tiny pieces. He would take one morsel
with the half of his mouth that opened
downward, and then turn sort OF hand
spring sideways to his other legs, and
cat another morsel with his other half
mouth. When hungry he would turn
so fast he looked like 200-revolution
Hy-wheel in motion He never wagged
his tail. The reason was that the mus
cular efforts at wagging, being equally
balanced on each side, counteracted each
other. Ho was better rabbit dog than
ever, for when he ran himself off one
pair Of legs, he'd simply turn aside
spring and go it on the other pair. You
couldn't tire him out. II was u great
blow to me when be died.
Mr.. Parker strokcd his chin con-
templatively, and Ebenczer Dc Witt
said slowly: your dog was truly won
derful; but he can't compare with my
rawhide traces bought them now in
Jersey, and first used them to cart
load Of wood up half mile hill to my
house. 1t was raining dismally as |
loaded the wood on the wagon, and the
rawhidc traces got thoroughly soaked.
When all was ready | mounted one of
the horses and drove to the house -
When got there | found that the wag-
on hadn't budgcd. The wet traces had
stretched the whole half mile. Here
was bad fix, and as the sun came out
just then, [ sat down to think about it.
Then the sun got 80 hot | went in doors,
leaving the horses standing.
When | came out minute later the
horses were straining to keep from being
pulled down hill. Looking down, | saw
my load of wood rumbliDg up the hill
at a jolly rate. was puzzled at the
first to understand what was pulling
them, but soon saw that as the sun dried
the traces they were contracting at the
same rate they had stretched when wet,
and as the horse held the ground at the
top of the hill the wagon had to come
up to the horses. | afterwards formed
company for lifting safes to tenth story
windows. Jay Gould put in the mon
ey and put in the traces. We both
got rich. The way lost those traces
was in trying TO sound the bot
tomless spring in Pennsylvania. We
tied weight to one end and dropped it
in the spring. AS the weight sank into
the depth those troces spun out till at
last they became so fine thread that a
butterfly CHANGING TO fit against one end
it snapped short of. ;"
Everybody cried Chestnut p at the