The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1888-05-02
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

oCCi-' dhhAii- 10 liut-up JOS'
A shady set-A group of trees.
A fowl tip-A ROSTERS comb.
. A paper-hanger sticks to his business.
The last thing in shoes-The wearer's
heel
Out on a strike--a defective lucifer
match. h.-Merchont Trdreier
Sleepy Hollow-"G nightw over
the telephone Boston Bulletin.
CAN roads lead to roam, remarked a
tramp, studying guide board
GrdDhic.
The butterfly which from the rose
Had tried TO sip with deep content.
Thought "how penurious this ilow'r,
For it will only give scentln
Albany Express.
Little Charlotte, four years old, was
Learning her alphabet. When she came
to W & she looked up, tired and DIS
gusted, and impatiently said; "Where's
the rest of 'em:"
Fair Matron-''Won't you let your
wife take a chance in this lottery
Husband-"Oh, no; she never draws
anything worth having" "Well, you
know marriage is lottery, sir" 'les
-er-that is-well, put her name
down"
His best girl was out walking with
him, and he Shot a beautifully plumaged
bird. "Oh, John how could you kill
the dear creature2" "Why, susie, l
thought you would like it for your Sun
day bonnet" "Oh! you dear, good,
thoughtful fellow"
GLOW many of you are therew asked
voice from an upper window, of a
party of waits" -Four" was the
reply. divide that among yon,n said
voice, Us bucketful of water fell,
'like the gentle dew from heaven" on
those beneath Cairo Messenger.
We see by dramatic exchangesahatJ.
Mr.. William Patterson attempter nc
title role in 'Hamlet" with the usual
result. e., the company walked home.
So at last the time -honored mystery of
who struck Billy Patterson is cleared up.
He was stagostruck. Albany EgPr0s.
lie had told her that business called
him TO Europe and that he might be gone
a year. With pale face and eatingheart
he nervously awaited the effect. Finally
the girl spoke: "You seem trihe
nervous and excited, Mr. Sampson, she
said, "Are you afraid of being seasick~
- Tile Epocb.
praised her beauty rare
Her face, her form, her dress
For she was wondrous fair,
And knew it, too, guess.
She tossed her queenly head
With motion proud and free,
And sweetly, bravey said;
you'll find no flies ON me.h
Ciereland Sun
Bobby was at neighbor's and in re-
sponse to the offer OF piece of bread
and butter, politely said "rhank you.
"That's right, Bobby" said the lady,
81 like to hear little boys say thank
you.n "Yes, ma told me must say
that if you gave me anything to eat, even
if it wasn't nothing but bread and
butter. ~ -Tid-Bts.
Man is largely the architect cf his own
fortune, and yet a strong and we'll de.
veloped man works hard for Sl2j OF
81. 80 per day, while a small, second edi-
tion sort OF man with au abuormally
developed wart on some portion of his
anatomy grows wealthy in dime
museum, and laughs the world to scorn.
oil Ci'g Bii.-gJd.
"Now that you are going to marry my
daughter | would like TO know something
of your faults Very wei, sir - "DO
you smoke or chewp "Noyer did
either in my lfe.n "Do you dgnk p
"No, sir. l don't drink or gamble 1r
patronizS horse races or swear or read
trashy literature And, now, after the
wedding, where would you advise me to
liye!' In Heaven, my son. .n-LiAc0Ls
Journal.