The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1888-02-08
Then She Nay C,ms Is-So Say We ALI Of
Us-Smiha Simihbus,
Too Misty for Him-ThiRs the Way to
Build En-.
They May Have Been, But Don't Look It
No NapOleons-Another Industry
Threatened-She Had Him.

Sweep DER Dakota'e plain?
Two more midWipter freezes
VIII crack her right in twain.
so SAY We ALL OF Us.
Doctor" said the by pochondriac, this
pain in my side is maddening."
II know it is" replied old Bolus; sit
makes NE mad every time l hear you
speak of it."
TOO MISTY FOR HIM.
'You advertised for an expert account
ant, siT?' "Yes, did; have you had much
experience?' About thirty years, sir; in
loIg and tangled interest aud partnership
accounts, confused Government books
chaDcery and bankrupt accounts, COM
panies' accounts, and" 'Well, here
what want you to do is this: here is my
wife's shopping list for one day. There
are about twenty-five items; see what she
bought, how much she paid for il, and
what the total amount Is" But the &C.
countant hesitated, shook his head, and
said that his only brother died in an insane
asylum for undertaking Just such matter,
and he believed he wouldn't touch it.
THAT'S THE WAY TO BUILD EN-,
well, sir,' said Elder Passbasket proud
~, there's one good thing about our new
church. It was built without debt. We
Just got together and borrowed forty-five
thousand dollars on long time and easy in
laid, and dedicated the church free of
debt" The elders children won't be
r heard from until the elder and hts genera
tion have been gathered to their fathers
sid the mortgages oegin 10 fall in.
THEY NAY HAVE BEEN BUT THEY DIDN'T LOOK
IT.
"Ah, WE'LL" sighed grandfather, ''times
amt what they used to be. Boys were
boys when 1 was a boy" And do Won
know We were glad to hear him say so, be-
cause CHANGING az portrait OF grandfather,
painted when he was boy, We weren't so
alIcertain sure of it, or, at least we
wouldn't have been but for his positive
assertion. a round face, with red lips,
pink cheeks, and well-set eyes, with an ex.
preston far too coed for this
world and not happy enough for
ing from fat.topped cap with
long silken tassel, jacket of blue with
Iptfies at the neck and wrists, low-necked
shoes and wide, snowy white, HeII-starch-
ed pantalettes-no, grandfather says they
are paDtaJoons-before we heard grand
iAtheT declare that that was his portrait,
and that boys we're boys in those days, we
thought ii was painting of grandma when
she was little girl. and had got on all her
clothes except her dress. Boys were bows
then. eh? Then they should have been
Labelled.
YOU ARE NO NAPOLEON.
Did you ever notice how easily any man,
void OF conscience and honesty, passes a
counterfeit balf-dollar on you, and how
utterly impossible 1t is for you to get rid
ofit7 Other men pass the glittering cheat
along, bat when il reaches you, there il
sticks. In the dark and gloomy street-car,
where the shriekfng blast and whirling
snow puts out the Pickering lamps, the
half driver of the bob tail detect
the swindle by the touch OF his benumbed,
and callOus fingers. The busy man at the
ticket-otfce. making change faster than
nlIFWheels strike, gets onto you with
both feet. Every body recognizes the cheat,
and one glance at your guilty face
conYinces them that YOU are purposely
trying to pass the debased coin. II you 90
back TO the man who gave it 10 you, he
boots, and laughs you to scorn, and says he
couldn't be fooled with that chunk of glass
and pewter If he was dead. 1 once carried
q counterfeit half for two weeks, and
utterly ruined my good standing by offer
ing il TO every body dealt with. Twice
put it in contribution boxes in church,
and the deacons, one CongregationaIist,
and the other a Baptist-my own father
spotted me both times. In despair / told
friend about ii one day, brisk young
fellow, who never had any money, and
had no credit, but could always get what
he wanted. Let me see it." he said,
Good as gold" be added, tossing il in
the air; but could make a better one
cut OF wood in the dark. Let's get cigar"
/ held him back. 1--WE been in that place
With il twice, " / said, land the last time
the man threw ii at me. and threatened to
have me arrested" "You don't count"
ssid he, and in We went; he bought three
elgars, got a quarter in change looked at
II suspicioUsly, and remsTking to the deal
CT as he reluctantly pocketed it, that there
was more counterfeit silver than good
money IN circulation. came out. was
onmo with amazement, bat he only said
Robbie, there's nothing to you; you'll
ca IN The poorhOuse-" But you're Just
Ike ne. To be g Napoleon of finance, one
must be born so. You can't make up
Tor The past with am degree of success.
sINILIA sIMILIBUs.
81 ind il almost impossible,n said Polyp.
10 Ind hat that will at my head com.
fortstly." "You ought always to wear a
soft felt, said Placidus, land il would at
80 neatly you couldn't tell head from
hat"
DAILY TILL FORBID; PAID.
Il see, said the city editor, "that you
have this morning a notice that General
George Wallace Austerglot, the bril-
liant speaker, the patriotic statesman,
and the soldier with the peer.
less record, Ia in the city. / didn't
know Austerglot was in the army"
he wasn't" said the managing editor;
ne LIT out for Canada the first time he heard
drum, and stayed there till 1863" well,
ne isn't brilliant speaker" said the city
editor, because I've heard him try to sec
oDd motion in caucus, and he couldn't do
1t without prompting"
Il know that" replied the manager,
and be knows less about craftsmanship
than he does about war" 81 see" ex-
claimed the city editor, softly, "then he
is-2" "As you say" assented the mana.
gen" candidate for Lieutenant. Governor"
PILE IT ON.
Take the tax off tobacco l wish that
ar. Blaige, or any living man who advo
Gates such thing. had to take trip over
the Kansas, Fort Scott and Gulf Road, or
The Missouri Pacific, or any road down that
"ey. Not in private parIor car but in
ire Day coach. where ladies and frst-class
pstsefgsTs have to travel. By the time a
tev men spit all over his feet, his yalise,
s'd me hoor of the car, his convictions
would undergo a change. | have seen
soHFr nieu, in forty-ive miles travel. put
ire HJnT or car in a condition that
voDlu disgust the drunkest drunkard
'fsf ever oo<ssssed intervals of respecta.
biiity ard common decencv. Reduce
TIE itx 90 chesipg tobacco II | had nv
Sby, aid ssy this without caring how