Evening journal., 1888-06-30


man wants pistol in Texas.
met bright Washington girl on the
street yesterday
She wore look Of despair (Which wss
plenty, considering the weather), and
other raiment, considering the proprieties.
"Oh, Mary Jane, she gaspsd, "giveme
on ear
Give you an oar2' said I, amazed.
Yes; give me an oar so | can paddle
ashore F."
Paddle ashore2' said I, startled.
Yes paddle ashore, said she.
What do you mesnY" said /.
why. I'm in a sea Of perspiration, and
II could only reach dry place | might
be saved"
didn't give her an oar, but took her
into drugrery and fed her on soda
water internal bath as a counter irritant.
And | am reminded right here OF what
soda water loving population we
have in this town. Everybody knows
that as q drinking town the national cap
ital stands at the head Of the list owing
TO the fact that politics and politicians
dominate the place and liqnor dominates
politics and politicians, but that refers
only to the men and to such drinks as
make drunk come" 1t seems to be in
the mir. however, and when the soda fount
begins to sputter and sizz, all kinds of
people, regardless OF age, sex. color and
! previous condition, file up to the various
| counters Of the various drug stores and
| go through pretty much the same motions
as the old stagers do who support the sa-
looms. except the motions Of reaching
under the edge Of the counter for the pub
lie towel and going for a Glove or a piece
Of lemon peel with which TO disinfect the
breath. Strange as it may seem to those
who have traditionary knowledge Of
Washington habitues, congressman, SEN
ators and other lofty functionnries Of
! government are not averse to ths mild
hammered and inofTensive effervescent,
and they too. on warm nights, give great
| hope to the temperance workers by
marching up boldly and taking a soda as
| If they liked it and would drink nothing
else between that drink and bed time
| / hope. however, that am not betray-
| ing state secrets when / say that the
/ young man who runs the fountain soon
| gets acquainted with the statesmen and
that Bourbon by the name Of strawberry
tastes as good. OF course l don't charge
those good men with practicing any de-
ception. but if the soda clerk wants to tell
mo pleasant little anecdotes of how Sen
ator X and the member from Waybaclx
play Jokes on each other surely I'm not
to blame. Neither am to blame if the
soda clerk fixes me up a soda from the
recipe they have given him. and it makes
me feel so funny that / have to 60 home
and 80 to bed
was talking to congressman's daugh.
ter the other day about being rich.
Il wish l was worth $l0,O00,O00," said
she.
what would you do with it?' said T.
"Well Ia buy $4,000 worth Of dia.
monds and o soda fountain.
Simple in her tastes, wasn't she2
I heard good story this week Of
Judge Chenowith, first auditor of the
treasury, and Col. Dick Wintersmith, del.
egate-at-large to Washington for life. II
may be g whiskered tale, but I win tell il
rs new and fresh. One day the colonel
went into the first auditors office and
found the judge very much detected in.
deed
Hello, Chenowith" he said, what
wrong2 You look like you had been to q
funeral"
Il haven't, said Chenowith; 'but I'm
In bad luck. I have just heard that o
note held on a man for $500 had gone to
protest, and I'll have to make other ar.
rangements to meet several obligations,
and haven't any money to do it with and
don't know where to get it."
The judge continued to deplore his sad
fate and the colonel sympathized and
soothed for some time and finally went
away
Next day he came again.
"By thunder, Chenowith, he said as
soon as ne came in, what a mind reader
you are"
Mind reader2 What do you mean2'
inquired the judge in innocent amaze
ment
s.Why, about that $500 note yesterday.
came in here at that time to borrow
$50"
Whether it really was a case of mind
reading or not nobody knows, and no
body is finding out any more than Col
Dick isn't getting the $50.
Stories about the peculiarities or srcen.
tricities Of Miss Amelie Rives, though she
is no longer Miss Rives, are going the
rounds, and am IN receipt Of one which
is indicative. A couple of Washington
gilded youth were down in Albemarle
county not long ago on hunting expedi
tion, and being properly indorsed, they
concluded to call on the Oyidian novelist
They went, and were ushered into the par
lor. where they waited an hour, and theI
tho young woman entered, and the two
youngsters-sca scarcely old enough to vote
either of them-were almost scared out o.
their wits She came in attired IN purI
white gown, with an immensely long train
aad with great angel sleeves reaching t,
the floor, and bearing in her two hands
like some weird priestess, hugo lamp
afnitting the softest rays of shaded light
The boys at once thought of "She," anS
were on the point Of falling ont the baci
window, but they recovered az sbe sa
down the lamp, and by time she had tslkes
awhile and invited them to supper the
were calm enough for all practical pur
poses. At the supper table one sat b.
kiss Rives' side and the other one imme
diatsly opposite, and was talking TO som
one on his side Of the table, while Mis-
R. devoted herself to the other. The
vwere talking of people, psychically an'
otherwise, and Miss r. remarked, with
nod toward her companions friend:
Now there's a man / never could &c
along with. Look at his face; there
nothing in it; he is absolutely stupid"
The young man was embarrassed. il
felt that it was not gallant to differ wit
his hostess and he felt that it was no
kind to acknowledge that his friend wa
a fool, so he maintained q discreet silenc
and let the eccentric being talk ON.
The boys held conference later an
the one across the table confessed that b
had heard all that had been going on o
tho other sido. NARY JANE