The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1888-11-15
RATES or ADVERTISING :
Thursday, Nov. 10, 1888.
From the y. Y. Observer.
Dr. Talmaga On Putting up Stoves.

no more depend on the heat of the
sun for our comfort. He kindlcs
his fires SO late in the morning and
banks them up SO early in ashes of
cloud mt night Even the extra coat
or shawl III the evening time do not
seem to do the work expected of
them. We have had three or four
sharp frosts In the city we send
for man to come and examine our
furnaces, and the lighting of fires
is no exciting event. But III the
country there is day as marked as
New Year. or Christmas, and that is
the day in which we put up the stove.
II has been standing in the garret or
shed all summer, dull end dead, the
fires gone out of the old back-slider.
Spiders have festooned the joints of
the pipe, and run i'm and out the 500
~ tunnel; the open top of the stove
perhaps having been the nursery
where the-old cat honorably brought
up her household of kittens. But
the day forsputting up the stove has
come. The children fly around with
expectation, and are somewhat in
the way during the undert aking.
The pipes are brought out and emp
tied, and thumped clear of SCOT and
dust. The housewife goes over all
the surfaces with blackening polish,
making the homely dark II handsome
black, and then the work of carrying
the stove into the sitting com
mences. There are not enough
hand. There never are. We have
put up stoves dozen times, and
never had help enough. Stoves are
so unwieldly. and they feel so heavy
when YOU set them down on your in
step. Father, with his lower lip
clinched on his teeth, lifts and pulls
and shoves, and gets fast in the
doorway. Mother and the serving
maid come to the rescue, but pull
the stove the wrong way. and get an
invocation upon the carelessness.
Don't You see what YOU are doing
Pull it back the other way Ouch =
Just look mt the back of my hand.
black and blue Efrom this scrouging.
There You have set that right leg
of 1t right on my sore toe Ny side
Is stove III =, But with an alto
Sether lift the heavy burden reaches
the middle of the room. Now begins
the work of finding one of the lost
legs One of them is gone. There
Is always one of them gone. The
sheds are ransacked TO no avail. and
two bricks are temporarily substi
tuted Then the pipe is to be Joined
and set up. This requires more con
sclentlous and determined consis-
tency OF behavior than any other
part. A man who will keep correct
ness OF speech i'll all the rest of the
process needs some toning up here.
You make up your mind as to where
the Ioints and pieces belong, and in
slst on their taking their places, but
how TO insert the larger in the small
er isa conundrum yet with hammer
YOU pound, and bang, and twist un-
III you have four stubborn pieces an
nexed, and have them hoisted. You
rise on the top of chair to make
the last conjunction ; you handle the
whole affair with utmost skillfulness;
you have your wife holding the pipe
at the bottom, and the daughter
holding II at the middle, when. with
out the slightest premonition, one
OF the lower joints backs out of its
place, and down all comes in one
grand crash, the wife struck by the
falling pieces, the daughter frighten.
ed lest she may somehow have been
the cause of the nishap, yourself
running your soOty hand across your
brow 10 wipe off the perspiration,
leaving you, in stage-struck position,
black as Othello. Every time the
attempt Ii made, the line of pipe
parts at new place until at last, to
the relief Of the whole household,
the undertaking is completed. Then
the first fire is kindled, the smoke at
first not knowing whether to come
out in the room and be sociable, or
20 up the chimney and disappear.
But at last the great black instru
ment Of comfort roars with chorus
Of cOngratulation and good cheer,
and in the evening all the family
gather about TO hear it laugh and
crackle Good old stove. For the