Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1888-11-13
FREAKS OF INVENTORS.
QUEER CONTRVANCES FOR WHICH
PATENTS HAVE BEEN ASKED.
Infatuation Of ar coupling Inventor.
Originator of the Bed Punch-The Lords
Prayer The Frog Engine" - Funny
Patent Cases-Rain Producer.

1uIatu3tlOb Oh |VuPhhS AA'VNS~A'
Originator of the BED Punch-The Lords
Prayer - The Frog Engine" Funny
Patent Cases-Rain Producer.
The freaks of the inventors mind and the
erratlc conclusions now and then reached IN
it, are proverbial However, there are In
ventors and inventors. The great majority
of them, to believe the dictum Of one Of the
oldest and most experienced patent solicitors
in town expressed to reporter, are eminently
rational, sensible men, to whom the saw that
necessity is the mother of invention does not
apply, inasmuch as they have renumerative
business of their own and -'sort to invention
merely as pastime. The professional In
ventor, however, very often appears to be
slightly unhinged in his mind, profound and
incessant cogitation having changed the
original bias of his intellect And then there
is the crank inventor.
"He appears in all his glory just after a
railroad horror or bridge disaster. The
patent office in Washington is then flooded
with applications from men and women,
nearly all of whom propose ridiculous, use
less or impossible things" said the patent So
licitor Now, many Of these obtain patents
ONIllR W lLS ItCb tilc law OCAucS tIc
term useful as merely not harmful Car
couplings seem to have the greatest attrac-
ton for the inventor. | don't know how
many hundreds Of patents have been issued
on car couplings and only a few are in use.
To remove car couplings from the inventors
mind would be a sensible decrease in the pat
ent solicitors revenues, but it would save him
much needless worry and expense. | remem-
Der the case of such car coupling inventor
! got him his patent, of course, but that man
was so infatuated with his invention that he
insisted on patepting it in all foreign coun-
tries as we'll Now, the fact OF the matter
was that while here at least his couplings
might have been used if the railroad compa-
MES had seen fit, in foreign countries they
could not be used without complete recon
struction of the cars. the coupling being only
applicable to cars of American build"
The oldest case of an inventor of whom
have a personal knowledge" said George
L. Chaplin, ''came to NE in 1868 or 1869 with
the model of bell punch. 1t was one of the
original base patents, and | saw good promise
In it for him. l pointed this out to him and
advised him strongly to wait for good offer,
but be sold the invention to a company in
Buffalo for $500, whereas it was worth thou
sands of dollars, and the company at no time
would have sold il for less than $50 600. They
made big fortune out of it. Afterward,
when they found that their patent was not
quite so valuable might be, they made him
reissue the patent and paid him $50 for it.
Even for this reissue be might have got sew
eral thousand collars, perhaps more. And
he did all this against my advice"
A prominent patent lawyer in town who
prefers to remain namelesS said: Among
the patented models destroyed By the great
fire was doll rugged up with wings and sup
posed to represent human being ready for
an aerial trip. A lady patented crimping
pin which she declared might also be used as
paper cutter, skirt supporter. paper file,
chilu's pin, bouquet holder shawl fastener or
book mark Another person wished me to
apply for patent on an application of the
Lords Prayer repeated in a loud voice to pre-
vent suffering. But as the Lords Prayer is
property common to all, and its utterance in
either loud or low tone Of voice is purely
optional, it is hardly necessary to state that a
patent was refused. A patent war, however,
actually granted for a spring attached to a
rocking chair and adapted to be wound up by
rocking the chair, SO that lady, while rest
iIlS, IOCEAS III NOAld Oc
storing up power that could be subsequently
utilized for operating churn, or for rocking
the baby for portion of the ensuing night.
During the war person desired 70 obtain
q patent for what he denominated rebel
catcher It cons ted Of a large trap having
spring jaws and movable platform, con
nected with a setting mechanism he pro-
posed to bait the trap with arms and anrnu-
milton and TO place the trap IN sigh; Of the
enemy, which he supposed would rush into
the trap, spring it and be everLastingly
caught and sent 20 the dernnition bow vows,
as the late Mr. Mantaiini would have said.
This, he claimed, would bring the war TO a
speedy end. Another inventor presented az
application for frog engine Re said bo
had observed the wonderful propellng
powers Of the frog and hence constructed
his engine in the shape OF frog, with the
body mounted on wheels and the legs con-
nected with the pistons, 30 that when the
latter were rec procated the legs would kick
the ground alongside OF the track and thus
propel the engine.
Il might go or telling you great many
more funny patent cases." said t6e lawyer,
taxing a breathing spell, but IA wind Up
by mentioning just the half dozen funnies.
ones that / remainder. One patent Is for
eradicatng q tape~orm By batting
small hooks and angling for the worE.A
The description speaks Of trap
made of gold and adapted 70 be baitea and
swallowed by the patient after fasting for
several days The hungry wo-Ta 10 sopposed
20 seize the eait and 20 be Ii turn caught by
the trap. which then can ce pulied up by a
string, and the offeGdiaS vorIa thus sru0gbs
TO light Patent for bee protector describes
and claims vibraso-y roos. f1r chickens
connected WITH the door Of bee hive Ine
weight Of the chickens On TIE rco<s csoses toe
beehive doors, which remain shE: 1ntl tie
chickens Leave their perch Hsucs II The
cnickezas are Of regular habits they VII esose
tie hive &. niSh. and c2en il in the morning
An application for q policsInans c1Ro, pro
v7Ged with ru-nero1s saa-7 teeth which
would sp-icg on. from Toe club The inssant .
blow wss struck, was rc.Esec - beng crueI
aid contrary 20 public policy.
a cAveas oc &c desc-ioes no-eesezs gz1.
The applicant grsveiy stated soss nsrssosore
the noise hss Al beea oatz.1e q he guz, bszt
be rrcycRes 20 curiine al tie syrc1 WITHIN
tie barrel By sealing the rgzzzse ED ssfe tcs
plate after the escape Of t6c aSoc A ps-so7
trosn one q lie territories hA~d A sgpsscs-
ttca with fne for producing rs-2- IN rs So
Citation Ae stated that ran WA sre1oers4y
pysysa.eS Gusa falling BIZ e sssxas1d Gyy