West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1888-04-26
Miss Oily Daily.

She is sort of omnipresent damsol
common to all communities, and on "a
nous visiting terms with all the neighbor
hood-at least, she thinks so. She always
runs into your house In great hnste as
though Der wish was to borrow fire, instead
OF telling You lin a yoice lowered in terror
lied accents) that your neiehbors on the
other side of her have just closed a loving
tussle TO remove superfiuous tresses from
each others devoted heads. Indeed, our
lingering informant draws on her imaQina-
ton so strongly in depicting the manipu-
ia'ion Of jet aud cardinal locks, that we see
forthwith n meutal picture of the angelic
ok-keeper above, with busy pen sub
tracing handfuls of hair from our neigh
boris record.
She has remained standing during this
exciting recital, she being lin too much OF
hurry to sit down. Now she sinks into
chair and relates other direful happen
ings, her haste apparently OF lesser import
ance than her chit-chat and the budget she
h. generously banqueting you upon. All
The time she is going, but doesn't get off,
Perhaps Miss billy Daily is such a very
kind-hcarted creature, and seeing the inn
Piled entreaty in your face for Just one
more OF her stories, she cannot deny YOU.
her society oil at once, so she breaks the
shock OF her departure by frequently re-
terated warnings Of We'll, really, must
But sho doesnt. She settles back and
aimlessly talks for ten more minutes.
though the wa9hor- woman may be waiting
Tor her wages, with a sick family at home
needing her immediate presence; OF, she
may be cheating you out Of other duties
which you are anxious 10 discharge; but
courtesy keeps You there giving ear to
Miss Oily Dally's gasconading and idle
Finally. this creature Of a most tirssoune
habit Will arise; but still she tarriea, stand
ing In various unbecomihg attitudes. repeat.
ing for the flieth time, II Just run over for
minute forgetting she has already slain
many golden minutes.
She may get halfway down the hall
when she win suddenly brighten up with
something sho had nearly forgot To eay .
Then, IN nervous state, you must listen
10 what rs Of no more benefit 20 YOU or
humanity In general than Hebrew IL 10
Geronimo. Then she hangs on % the
door-knob, 5till talking as 81 she held the
hand u long-lost friend and folt lonth
20 part with IT, After the door Is opened,
She issues general and particular invita-
lions 70 eyerybody present 70 "call soon,r
pitching her voice TO upper q 10 reach
those who may not have followed her b The
door.
She may get SO FAR ~ the gate, when an
after thought, or "a last undorsc0re 10 "Gall
go0n,F strikes Gus going" caller, and You
must risk pneumonia ~ standing In The
chill Winds % patiently nnd politely hear
90 the end.
Everybody seems relieved after Mis-
Oily Dnilys departure. She may be ever
20 nice otherwise, but her prolonged an.
nouncoments Of going dotract from ben
society materially.
Miss Oily Daily and ail others whom 10
may concern, when yO0 sag you must 20
put your potential verb into force and 20
DO not daily and have everybody on the
Qw vire 10 see y0u go. Re not 0dondvels
short 81 abrupt, but 60, when yon Ssy you
aFo going Prof dd. ~. Gfo8on, ia Si,
kosls MaoQsiae.