The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1888-09-12
BRIGHT BITS

Two OF A KISp-First German Actor has
be N dinking dot will blay me in English next
season. You dink mine accent vos good enough,
Schweit5ers
Seconi German Actor-Mein gracious, yes
You, speak dot English yuSt so well like me-
Time.
FARMER Ito hired man)-seems to ME you
spend good share of your time sitting on the
Hired Man-YeS; I have done something in
the literary line and am collecting material for
book TO be entitled Life on the Rail. Bur
tngtO't Free Press.
SoAKER Qaying down his glass)-"whew
That terrible Schooner of bser you give for
cents, Karl "
ksrt-"Yaw; dot Teller Blut- wurse ACROSS de
way seds oop glasses a food high; but will beat
him in size if hat to make dose bottoms four
I inches thigck'-Judge.
CoLLEcToR-I'd like to know when you are
going to pay this bill. | can't be running here
every day in the week.
Debtor-H hat day would suit you best?
Well could come again Saturday.
All right from now on you can call every
Saturday. -Te.cds SUtllgs.
50 bill around here, Hoffman,, | wish you'd
hang on to it for me. I've just lost one out of
my pocket.
Mr. Hoffman House-Was it a new bill or an
old onel
Upson--O, brandnew one just borrowed
it an hour ago.-Puck.
W1FE-Wnat does this circus advertisement
mean when it spea&s of man with an iron
jaw?
Husband-Means what it says, of course
Wife-Dear me: don't know what would
do if had an iron jaw.
Husband-Youd wear it out in about six
months.-Ltncoln journal.
Horny HANDED HARRisoNIAN. Labor
Leader Captain Of Blaine Guardl-Say, I'm in
fix. That girl I'm engaged to wants to get
married at O'Clock in tine morning an She
wants me TO wear workin clothes, an carry a
| dinner pail, an she's goin' TO have on a milk
iairman Foster-A very romantic miss
| Well, why don't you do as she wishes
| Labor Lea ier-l amt got no workin clothes.
The Cartoon.
"As You can only be a sister to me-" he said,
| in broken tones, will you let me kiss you good
| nights'
She shyly said she would
| Then he folded her in his strong arms, and
| gently placing her head against his manly
| breast, he kissed her plssionately.
MIR. Sampson sne said, softly, this is all
| so new to me, $3.50 different from what |
Thought it to be, that ii you will give me little
| time toto thing it over IL may
| But let us withdraw from the sacred scene
/ Net0 York sun.
| IT was at a railway eating station. The man
! from Montana was hungry and in a hurry
| Please pass me them pertaters, mister, he
| said, addressing the elegant gentleman from
| Boston, who sat next him.
! The Bostonian slowly focused his gold eve
| glasses on the man from Montana. Did you
| think that was one OF tue waiters?" he asked
| icily.
| The others held their knives and forks sus-
pended IN mid-air, expecting to see the man
| from Montana shrivel up, but no such phenom-
| enOn took place. He turned and beckoned to
the nearest waiter. George come here,
| please"
what is it, siry" asked George.
| 81 wanted to apologize to you, that is all.
You see l mistook this party here for you, but
| ! hope you won't be offended at il. Now then
pass me them pertaters and wen go on with
| the roundup san Francisco Examiner