Morning journal and courier., 1888-12-27
CLOSED.

Winter garments-"Close that door!n- Pittsburg Chronicle. Telegraph.
 Man is about the only animal who s'draws in his horns" through his mourh.-Dansville Breeze.
 Bobby-s'What did you say, pag" Pa than I have to, do Is"-Binghampton Reput- lican.
 ''So old Brown is dead, ehs Well, ,welll Did he leave anythinga" "Yes. It broke his heart to do it, but he left everything. ."-Harper's Bazaar.
 It was woman who saw the first snake. Since then, however, the other sex has ac. quired practical monopoly of this expsri- ence.-Burlington Free Press.
 Lost Illusions What, is everybody wicked, mamma, dear?" "Yes, Bertie. "Are you wicked yourself, mamma, dear?" ''Not so good as ought to bel" "And the po- ice?-Punch.
 A Protest.-Little Boston girl Gas the hair brush is reached fer)-"Mamma, the conseo- utiveness and the prevalency of these inter- minable castigacions slowly sspping my very Hfei''-Time.
 When a man comes at you with fury in his eye and both hands doubled up fist fash ion, my son, endeavor to impress upon his mind the duty of calmness and moderation. Boston Transcript. A Family Trait-Rloodgood- never knew my cousin, did youG' Jarvis-"No." i" Bloodgood-"Well, he was tough one" Jarvis (meditativelY)-"Yes, I should infer sop Burlington Free Press. There is no curing confirmed egotist. Gall him donkey, and he thinks you have made serious mistake. Cut his acquaintance, and he pities you for the treasure you have lost-New Orleans Picayune. People We Meet,' is the title of recent 1x1 "a oLro1 ! through it for the name of the man who borrowed $5 from us last winter, but 1t does 1 not appear to be there.-Yonkers States man.
 An incident of the Bowery party Coming around the corner)-"pm very 1 sorry, madam. How did you fall downl" Stout Iady-''Bless your 'eart, I ain't fell | down at all. I'm tn lady as is tn dwarf in th' thesytre below. ."-Time. It is decidely cold sort of satisfaction | for the young skater who has just been pulled from hole in the ice, on reaching | the shore, to find staring him in the face the notice: Bathing in this lake is positively forbidden. Yonkers Statesman. | What world this is getting to be! Let @ boy steal an old mat from a doorstep, and l the next morning you will have the edifying privilege of reading column or more of full l some praise of the detective who worked up l the case. Detectives should ever hold in the I highest regard little boys who steal old mats l from doorsteps.-Boston TIansoript.
 "Ah, begorrah, the Oirish always do the 1 winnin' in ivsrything," said young Hi-
 berian, who was receiving instruction in poker.
 ''To what do you refer nowl" asked one of
 the party.
 ''Orve noticed that not wan av yer dis putes the right of a pat hand. ."-Merehant 1 Traveller.
 A church for deaf mutes has just been
 conseerated in Philadelphia. Such house
 of worship has it's advantages. When msn-
 Der drops his offering onto the contribution plate the congregation can't determine from l the sound whether 1t is 8 nickel or one-dol- l lar bill. And a man can enter fifteen min utes late without turning the heads of all present.-Norristown Herald.
 Judge Poland's constituents at St. Johns-
 bury were the strongest of prohibitionists and at a public meeting the judge took l strong ground in favor of prohibitory legis- l lation, and of temperance generally. few 1 days after gentleman who was very much | impressed with the speech happened to sit
 next the judge at dinner in Montpelier, and l was much surprised to see him drink his 1 wine with apparent relish. "Why, judge,
 said he, ''isn't this rather inconsistent with l your St. Johnsbury speechl' Mot in the l least, sir, not in the least. spoke then for l my constituents, sir; now I drink for Luke
 Polank. ."-Concord (N. H. Monitor.