Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1888-05-10
A TAILOR'S GOOSE.
Autobiography of a Very Modest
Smoothing Iron.

l am only tailor's goose. Yet. hum
BILE as am, form the primary wedge
in the social ladder On which my owners
have reached the goal of their ambi-
ton. am rusty. and the dust of years
has settled upon nc. Ignored and
despised. am cast aside. The very
mention of my name causes the blood
to flush the face of those who should
honor me. for it was l who earned
their bread and smoothed from their
lives the lines of care and poverty
when l smOothed the seams from our
patrons suits. How well remember
it all. The plain little house of Peter
Jinks. and how he brought one day his
young wife home and proudly showed
her his possessions.
Here" said he. with the pride of a
monarch. lis our living-rOom. and
here next is my cosy little shop, and
there said he. pointing to me. lis
my brand new goose.
'.Ah!' cried she, chow snug and
nice; and our goose is so bright" and
caressingIy she laid her hand upon me.
Peter. dear, we can work together
now. can sew the seams and you
can ply the goose! And there is your
sign! How beautiful! Red letters"
"'Peter Jinks-Tallor.' Why. love.
i reads like a poem." she said. en-
Enthusiastically. "How strange that L
Reegy Brill, little barmaid. to marry
aman whose name appears in red let
tiers before the public. My noble hus-
band; how proud am of YOU"
Thus closes my memory of the first
chapter in the Jinks household.
The years passed and brought pros
perity to Peter Jinks- As his family
increased his business grew apace.
From his humble cottage he moved to
one Of the prominent commercial Gen.
tiers of the city. and on his enlarged
sign were. in golden letters, added:
Merchant tailor. with P aris styles"
A few more years the sign was
abolished and Jinks was rich man,
and he become an importer of goods.
l. of course. was cast aside. and for
years rusted i'm the debris. One day.
to my surprise. Jinks saw me. His
fingers. that were once hard and
horned with \ million needle marks.
were now smooth and white. Amaz =
ment all! Twas lifted carefully from
my surroundings of trash with those
same smooth hands. That night l was
taken home with him. Wife," said
he. ''here is our dear old goose; take
care of it, for it was the first friend of
our honeymoon. Do you not remem-
Der the time l brought you home rs
my bride? / can see you now as YOU
caressed it SO lovingly with those
pretty hands"
'Ctase!' cred Mrs. Jinks. loudly.
you brute! How can you be so cruel?
Have / not pleaded with yOu never to
refer TO that past. so degrading to our
present social position?
There. see what You have done!
Justicia has almost swoOned!" and
she rushed wildly to uphold the 1.-the
limp form of Miss Jinks. who was
gasping; Take it away! Take it
await"
Yes. love-" cried the fond mother.
''Papa is too cruel; YOU may look up
now; the horrid thing has been re-
moved" Justicia raised her languid.
azure orbs. and gasped with relief
Now that our daughters have COM
ple;ed their education. said Mrs.
Jinks, few days later to her hus-
band, .rheir culture and excessive re-
tinement need a more aristocratic
sphere. You must buy or build a
residence on Crabapple street"
Madame, are you mad?" cried
the exasperated Mr.. Jinks. Il will
consent to no such f oily.
But remember the future of our
children" screamed the persevering
matren. Gone girls. plead with
your father Think of n home on
Crabapple street! You will be part of
the social hash. Your fathers pet.
the goose. will be forgotten. and your
names will appear as social lights in
print"
Delightful! our names in news
paperr' screamed Justicia.
.'Too charming" CALCULATED Clemen-
tina
Its time to bring the goose"
cried Mr.. J.. - he started for the
garnet.
Don't pray. don'tr' screamed the
three fainting women.
Notwithstanding Mr. Jinks' sensible
reasoning. he was overpowered BY
feminine entreaties. and before
another year the 'Crabapple street.