The Osceola times., 1888-10-20
AN ENGLISH HOTEL.
How London Caravansaries Are Ran 81
the American Plan.

How London Caravansaries Are Ran 81
the American Plan.
IL you have never stopped at an Eng
lish hotel conducted on the American
plan, you should do so at the first op-
portunity, because you will enjoy 1t i'm.
mensely. They have American pen-
sions pronounced pon-say -ongs) in
Paris, Berlin and Vienna, which lure
many of my countrymen and women to
destruction, and Of which | hope to be
able TO tell you something later. but
with all their faults | think they have
some claims upon our consideration az
tourists which lay over the English
hotel conducted on the American plan.
You are driven up to this hotel In q
carriage, and you expect to alight at
the ladies' entrance, as you would un-
der similar circumstances at the Palmer
or Grand Pacific. But you don't do any
thing OF the kind.
The driver descends, and, approach
ing large iron gate, pulls bell-knob,
which pull is responded to by She ham.
mer of a gong such as pilots signal TO
tho engineer with on American steam
boats. The driver then resumes his
seat.
In the course OF the morning, or al.
ternoon, or night, MS the case may be-,
the gate is opened, and the warty-faced
man with a stub nose approaches the
carriage. He is in no hurry whatever.
"Do you wish TO hingage apart
ments?"
1--WE do"
"Ave you brought your baggage"
ave ave not"
"Ware is itp"
"At the Euston station"
"As hit been hexaminedp"
ave presume So"
"Ave ye the checksp"
1--WE ave"
The warty face man grunts, passes
through the gateway, locks the gate af.
ter him, and returns in the course OF an
hour. This time he swings the gate
wide open and invites the driver to
come in. We are now in the open
court yard. We alight We enter an
Office that looks like railroad baggage
room. The "lift' isn't running, but II
will be in few minutes. We wait
half an hour. We climb the stairs. We
are taken to handsome suite OF rooms.
We are tired and cross
Enter another white aproned man
| Would like our names. Gets them. Bows
and retires. Enter another white-apron
ed man with an nose like lobster claw
Hands us bill OF fare. We order break.
fast.
when can we have itp"
"Iimmejiately."
"All right"
"What, sirp"
81 say, all right"
"Ycs, sir, twill be all right, SIR"
1t comes in the course of the day. W.
hint TO the waiter that we understood
that this hotel was conducted on th>
American plan.
$50 it is" he replies, and he says i
so firmly and conclusively that it would
be useless to contradict him.
We rest, take a nap, read the paper,
and kill time as best we can until tn,
afternoon is well advanced. We ring
for waiter Waiter comes. This tim,
his nose has the color of a blue-hottl,
fly.
''How about dinner?"
"Tabledote or served?"
"Tabledote, of course"
"Tabledote over, sir"
| 'Why were we not calledP"
"Got no orders, sir"
"Well, then, let us have IL served.
We learn later that guests are no
invited to table d'hote unless they leave
orders to that effect and it is serveC
only for one hour. Our dinner mus
be cooked completely and the day is al
most spent before it arrives.
Papa" suggested Ned, 'let us q
out and find an American hotel that il
conducted on the English plan"
This seemed absurd at first, but 1t il
just exactly what | proceeded to d.
after dinner. / don't find an American
hotel exactly, but | find one that ism
conducted upon any particular plan
and we will have our belongings move'
over there in the morning .-Londo'
Letter in Chicago Times.