davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02
would my family like thatp How
should like to figure as--as"-
NV wife was sobbing

would my family like thatp How
should / like to figure as--as"-
My wife was sobbing.
"D-n emf / cried. "They have Z
good deal of impudence. / won I
answer question. And If they print
any lies about me, I'll prosecute emil"
persisted in my resolutions; and a
week after three newspapers were sent
me.
tore off the wrappers fiercely.
The first one had column and Q
half cut out leaving what was proba-
bly, the heading of an article Of that
length. This title read: "Mr. Albert
Jones, the author of "A Study on Politi-
cal Economy" The article was left
to my imagination.
Iopened the next There 1t WASH
ten years older. hoe-handle, two
rooms. and all; and the few facts so
distorted as to be almost unrecognlza-
BILE.
After / had stamped round the room
a little while, l came back to my table
and opened the third paper.
In the very middle of the first page
were two columns of facetious abuse.
1 and my Political Economy" were held
up by this Goliath of the pen as Ma
caulay says DR.. johnson held up his
subject "like nutmeg-grater." We
were turned round, and turned over,
and smiled at and smiled at, and
smiled al!
Before going to the extent of the law,
I wish to make one appeal to the bet
ter nature of such critic, II he has
any.
How would he like it HIMSELF No
body wants to read about his affairs.
but suppose that they did. How
would he like an eye and an ear at his
keyhole while he eats, drinks and
sleepsP What if they should hear his
little domestic quarrels, smell the
chicory in his coffee. nose out the hair
dye in his locked closet. and the cush-
ions in his stocking drawer, and put
them all in the papersP
He colors his hair. pads his figure
and visits his dentist in disguise, and
is happy in the conviction that he
doesn't look over rs years of age. But
some morning his neighbor over the
way looks up from the paper and says:
"Wife, girls. you thought that Smith
was only rs years old. He is 55! Stokes
has found him out. He keeps his
charms in a bottle where what s-his-
names demon was. no. wasn't kept.
His whiskers have been to Mrs. Allen s
and his calves are sawdust His teeth
pass the night in tumbler Of water.
There he comes now, tripping down
the steps, the old foolr'
Nov, how would the critic like
thatP" AoUILA
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02
ON THE TRUCKS.
A wild Ride From BOSTON TO Now
York in 1884.


II was in December. ga, that ! was
"strapped" IN Boston. I was out Of
employment at the time. and my am
bition WAS 10 get to New York, where
hal friends. But having no money
couldn't accomplish It. As ! was sit
ting in my room one cold night, gen.
tleman called on me and asked me to
take some important document to New
York for him. He was in the same fix
as myself, being without friends In
Boston or money. The papers. he
said. were worth S5. 600 10 linn II they
were delivered TO proper parties in
New York. and he said he had come to
see If I would undertake the job Of
getting them there for him.
'But. my dear sir, l have no money
to defray travelling expenses.
'That is the exact fix that am in
myself. but if you can manage to de-
liver these papers for me / will give
you $1,000" he said.
accepted the offer. although l had
not the slightest idea as to how was
to get to New York. l lay awake all
that night thinking about it. At last a
lucky thought struck me. The trucksl
l had heard of such thing being
done. but at tho thought Of doing so
myself my blood turned cold. But on
further thought determined to risk
my life for $1,000. 1t was then Tues
day, and was to deliver the papers on
Saturday.
In tho morning produced some
boards and made myself sort of
shelf, as il were. When the time came
| was ready. obta ned coil Of small
rope. and with my homemade shelf re-
paired TO the depot. 1t was as dark rs
pitch and as cold rs Greenland. Five
minutes before the train started I
crawled in under the last car, and
arranging my shelf. fastened myself
to the truck by the rope had brought
with me. 1t seemed an age before the
train started, but it did at last. What
sensation! As the train struck
forty mile gait it seemed as IL my last
moment had come. was bcnumbod
which was revolving at terrible rap
idity within two inches Of my head, al
most blinded me. l seemed TO lose
control of my limbs, and had it not
been for the rope that held me should
have dropped under tho wheels. At
last heard the brakeman yell Worce-
ster. The fear Of d scovery then over
took me, and | was afraid 10 leave my
narrow perch, and awaited the start Of
the train again. Springfield. Hartford
and New Haven were reached and /
was still alive. although faI from well.
But the run from New Haven to New
York without a stop was the worst Or
deal. Sixty m les without stop! The
train was evidently behind time, for it
fairly flew over the frosted rails. The
roar was terrible. Blood rushed from
my nose and ears, but still held fast
Well, l reached New York alive, but l
often wonder how | crawled from my
narrow perch and hid in a coal-yard
until morning, when refreshed by some
| good cold water. l started out on my
mission. | reached my destination.
delivered the papers, received the 3d.
900 and started back for Boston in a
genilemanly way.
| got my reward of $1,000, but
don't believe to this day that my Bos-
ton friend knows how got to New
York.-frank Thompson, IN MeU York.
| Press.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02
Total. .... 90, OBS ,4sS 1885,, SIS /, 81, 400

Sunday school teacher once asked
member of his class, ''Who killed Abel?" A
snail boy who we have no doubt stood at the
cot, If there was foot, replied without hest
iation: at was the CORY captain OF the
Black Valley rangers. His blood stained
'lade flashed for moment in the air and he
nied, You are my meat, and Able was
turned like a grindstOne on the ehiertain's
sword"
In the Devils Lake region, North Dakota,
Ramsey County raised 1}5, 0G0 bushels OF wheat
rom 81, 900 acres, Nelson county go, 900 bush
Is from As, 962 acres; aud Bottineau County
!49, 0T9 bushels from Z ,099 acres; Brown County
in the James River Valley raised 4,009, SS7
bushels Of wheat from 100, 94T acres and 9, 773,
l64 bushels OF oats from 4S,652 acres of land
Surveyors going over the line between
Washington and tireen counties, Pa, found
one house so situated that the husband eats
his meals in Washington while his wife eats
hers in Green and they sleep with their
heads in one county and their feet In the
other.
The extension OF the st. Paul, Minneapolis
Manitoba has lately opened up for settle
pent large quantity OF land in the Devils
lake and Turtle Mountain countries. This in
'ludes about 100000 acres in the immediate
'icinity of the track, surveyed during the past
;Cason, and now eligible for entry. And there
will be a rush Of settlement to that part Of the
Territory in the spring.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02
Ex-Ald. 5. o. Dishman Happily Sur
prised.

Father, we are much pleased at seeing
you home again. Come, sit down and
tell us of your journey"
We'll, have been out about five week s
this time, and have met with very crafty
ing results. Ihave written many policies,
and what is still more pleasing, find that
the Masonic Mutual Benefit Association
is becoming very popular in this state.
Now, Effie. tell me how you are; l see
you are looking so much better"
Yes, father, that rheumatism which
has given me so much pain for months
has entirely left me. Oh! was so lame
part of the time that | could scarcely
stand upon my feet. IIibhard's Rheumatic
Syrup and Plasters cured me"
We'll. Ellie. that reminds me | have
heard more praise for that remedy than
any other ever known; every place where
have been | hear the people speak of its
merit. both as a great medicine for rheu
matism and a blood purifier,
Well father you can recommend it;
say that believe it t be one OF the best
in the world Fife l.. Dishman,
Third street, Grand Rapids, Mich.
Dec "a. 1887.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02

You think perhaps that Dakota is too far
north (D. Have you ever thought that England,
Northern France, Germany and Denmark are
all far north Of the northern boundary of the
Territory and that the same parallel Of latitude
that passes through Its central sportion cuts
through Southern France, Northern Italy and
Anstriai Dakota extends only from latitude
~ degrees 30 minutes TO 40 degrees, barely half
way from the Equator to the North Pole. The
southcrnmost point Of England by latitude Is
20 miles north Of the northern boundary OF
dakota.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02
One of thu Two.

"Look at General Black. Hos a
remarkable man." remarked travel
ing man. who was discussing politics
with an acquaintance.
lin what wayP"
Hes been to Congress three times
and isn't worth $4,000 What do you
think of that?"
well. l should say tibet he is either
honest or else he's blamed fool"
Merchant TraUeier.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02
Protection for American Sheen

Protection for American Sheep.
Dakota Sheep Rancher-What's the
mattere
Hired Man-The thermometer is 60
degrees below zero and the sheep are
frecz ng again.
Il shall start for Washington this
very da'. The tariff on Australian
wool must be raised II ought to be 81
pound.
"Will that IN any good?"
Eyes. Stree. Then | can afford TO
dress The sheep IN seaskin sacquos -
Omaha IIori.i.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02
Dec. a, lSSI

How many persons who for the first time
visit, the giant twin cities, st. Paul and Min
ncapOlis. with their combined population Of
800, 900 inhabitants, realize that the secret OF
their greatness lies in the fact that they are at
the southeastern portal Of a mighty empire
which, for 800 miles further northwest, is
especially fitted for the perfect growth Of all
those productions which administer most to the
necessities and welfare Of the human race.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02
State of Ohio, City of Toledo, /

Frank J. Cheney makes oath that he is the
senior partner of the firm of F. J. Cheney &
Co., doing business in the city Of Toledo,
County and State aforesaid, and that said firm
will paw the sum of one hundred dollars for
each and every case of Catarrh that can not
he cured by the use of Halls Catarrh Cure.
Frank }. Cheney.
Sworn to before me and subscribed in my
presence, this 9th day of December, A. D. 81.
[Seall A. W. Gleason, Notary Public.
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken internally and
acts directly upon the blood and mucus sur
faces of the system. Send for testimonials
free. +. J. Cheney & Co., Toledo, o. Sold by
Druggists, Is cents.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02

We call your attention to the seed adver-
tisemept OF II. w. Buckbee, Rockford ILL., II
you intend to purchase seeds. plants. etc, you
VIII find this first class reliable house. Illus
trated catalogue mailed free, upon application,
to all readers OF this paper.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02
Common-sense in a Nutshell. Don't
Drug.

The nervous system is the seat OF animal
life, and its office is to furnish intelligence,
sensation, and govern the functions Of the
body. IL the person is born with natural In
ability Of the nerves, all the medicine In exls-
tence cannot make them constitution, or
furnish health. IL by mental and physical
overwork, or dissipation, the healthy nervous
system is weakened, we are sick because they
are unable to keep the functions going. In
such a case how much do you gain by forcing
function with an irritating drugi The re-
action leaves its nerves weaker than before.
This accounts for the thousands of nervous
women in existence The Moxe Nerve Food
has proved 100000 times that it can restore
such cases without harm.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02
L Y M B AGO.


Garriage.-Why so many deviate fror, n
graceful carriage may be accounted for in az
many ways as there are misshapen beings.
MUSCULAR WEAKNESS.
Lame Back.-The spinal column is the main
stay of the body, which stiffens mn tbe
straight man or woman, and nature has
provided muscular supports TO hold il erect.
TWISTED OUT OF SHAPE.
Dist0rtions.-Me and women recklesslv
twist themselves out of shape, and the re-
suit is the few standing straight and the
many bending down.
SYMPTOMS.
Palns.-Those which atilict the back are the
most insidious or subtitle. They come al
times without warming we rise from sit
ting posture to find the back so crippled or
strained as to cause acute suffering.
TREATMENT.
cure.--Rub the parts afflicted freely with
ST. JACOBS Oh; rub hard and vigorously.
producing warmth, and if the pain is slow
in yielding wrap the parts in flannel stepped
in hot water and wrung out.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02

To the Editor:-Please inform your readers
that have positive remedy for the above
named disease. By its timely use thousands OF
hopeless cases have been permanently cured.
shallbe glad to send two bottles Of my rem.
edy free to any Of your readers who have con-
sumption II they will send me their Express
and r. O. address. Respectfully,
7. A. Slocum, NC, 1S1 Pearl St., New York.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02
woopmAn, SPARE THAT IRE.

Inrecommending the folding saving machine repre-
scnted above, we have but compunction--ths TOO
rapid destruction OF our already fast disappearing
forests- The implement is truly triumph OF mechani
cal genius and Tor rapid and satisfactory work easy
adtasiment and READY portability, Its equal appears
RsSss " Lave Ls.A L,.Lt,d. man eaa carry 10 y
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02

In the three years from 1884, the corn crop OF
Dakota has more than treblcd In quantity with
the certainty of constantly increasing, 10 the
future, this established ratio Of progress.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02
Offer No. III,

Free!-To Merchants Only: A genuine
Meerschaum Smokers Set, five pieces), In
satiD-lined plush case. Address at once, r.
w. Tansill 4 Co., IS State Street, Chicago.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02

Scratches. A. Shaffer; Madison, Wis,
says: 81 cured a horse Of the worst case OF
scratches that / ever saw with Veterinary
Carbolisalve. OF all the remedies ever saw
this is the "bOss. 25c and SOC at Druggists
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02

Fits: All Fits stopped tree by DR.. Klnes
Great Nerve Restorer. No Fits after first
days use. Marvellous cures. Treatise and
s2.00 trial bottle free to 1T cases. Send to
DR.. Kline, s3l Arch ST., Phila., Pa
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02

Dakota in 1887 raised more corn than tho
entire product in 1886 OF either the States OF
New York, Maryland, South Carolina, New
Jersey, Louisiana, West Virginia, California or
seventeen others OF the States and Territories.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02

He--iandsome woman, that Major Dold's
wife; but why will she wear such loud gowns?
She-0ut Of consideration for the Major
fancy;he is SO shockingly deaf don't you know.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02

No safer remedy can be had for Coughs and
Colds. or any trouble of the Throat, than
Browns Bronchial Troches." Price 25 cts.
Sold only in boxes.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02

This standard
preparation has
by its peculiar
merit and its
wonderful cures
won the conG
dence OF the
people. and Is
10 day the most
pop,ilat blood
pu rihe ana
streDgt b eui d g
III e ale In e. u
cures scrotula,
W.
DtDEih1 II y u u
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02

There was man of our town and he was
wondrous wise. he jumped into bramble
bush and scratched out both his eyes. And
when he saw his eyes were ont. with all his
might and main, he bought bottle Of Saliva
tion OIL, and rubbed them in again.
The freight rates OF our trunk lines have
been advanced, but tins will have no effect on
the price OF DIR. Bulls Cough Syrup, which Is
sold at the old price of IS cents bottle.
The banana is much more an antiquity than
the chestnut, yet the chestnut is allowed a
place In the language as mark of great age.
The belief that when Adam fell he slipped on
a banana paring is accepted by quite num-
Der OF thoughtful persons, and II Is correct
the chestnut should 20.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02

the woods under his in the morning, saw down
and trim trees cut the logs and cut seven or more
cords OF wood before night The firm, Folding Saving
Machine Co., sos to 81 South Canal street. Chicago,
H. offer them at reasonable rates and any lumber
man or farmer with few Of timber can make
one save hrst cost in short time Send for their
circular and form your opinion the subject
II you buy one lots OF tune. muscle and ehps win 30
scono mixed.
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02

Sold By Druggists and Dealers Epey,sher..
the CHARLES A. voGElsR CO., Baltimore. Ma
Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1888-02-02

chi n isworth $500 per n. Peisits Eye salve Is worth
oOhS ttooo but Is sold at - sents bo1 by dealers
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1888-08-16
NOTICE IN INSOLVENCY,

In the District Court of the Second Judicial Dis.
trict of the Territory of Idaho. in and for the
County of Alturas.
In the matter Of the petition of Henry Bews an
Insolvent Debtor.
1t appearing to the Court that Henry Bews has
filed his petition. schedule and inventory accord.
ing to law it is therefore ordered by me- Judge of
the District Court of the Third Judicial District
of Idaho Territory, that the said Henry B-ws he
and he is hereb, declared nsolvent and the Sheriff
of Aituras County ia hereby directed 10 take pos.
session of the estate, both real and personal of
the said Henry Bewf, except such Ms may be by
law exempt from execution and all Of his deeds
vouchers, books "f account and papers, and keep
them safely until the appointment OF an assignee.
The said Sheriff and all other persons are hereby
forbidden to pay any debts or to deliver any prop
erty belonging to said Henry B"ws to him. or for
his use. and he. the said Henry B-ws, is forbid
den from transferring any property belonging to
him to any person or persons wh8i soever
1t is further ordered that the 22nd day of August
lSSS, at the Courtroom of the District Court in
and for Alturas County he and the same is here
by appointed as the time and place for a meeting
of the creditors of the said Henry Bews, to prove
their debts and to choose or more assigrers of
the estate, and that notice thereof be- given by
publication in the WooD RIvIR TEiEs. a news.
pnper published at HALEY, IN said Aturns County,
as often as said newspaper is printed until the
date fixed tor said meeting.
Dated Jnly II. lhSs
CASE BRODERICK. District Judge.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1888-08-16
Sheriff IS Sale.

James P. McCnrter. Plaintiff, va. Pierce Dorgan
and John Rafter, Defendants. Order of Sale
and Decree and Foreclosure and Sale.
Decree of Foreclosure AMI Sale, issued out of the
District Court of tn. Second Judicial District of
Idaho Territory, in and for Alturns County, on
the .hDth day of July. A. d. 1SSS, in the above
entitled action, wherein James p. McCartcr, the
above.nahlcd plaintiff, obtained a Judgment aud
Decree of Foreclosure aDdSale against Pierce
Dorgan and John Rafter, defendants, Oh the 10th
day of December, A. ID. 1887, for the sum of
Twenty-Five Hundred Dollars, in United States
said Decree WAS. on the 10th day of December, A.
ID. 1887. recorded in Judgment Book ) of said
Court, ht pnge 81. l am commanded to sell all
those certain lots pieces, parcels of land sit.
uate, lying, and Ceing in the County of Alturas
Territory of Idaho, and bounded and described in
said Foreclosure aud Order of Sale, as follows:
The undivided three fourths "a in and to those
and WAS lorated Ms the Galore" lode and mining
claim. and the other was located and is known Ms
the stormy" lode and mining claim. both sitl.
ated i'll West Richmond gulrh, in Little Smoky
Mining District, in said Alturas County Idsho
Territory.
Public notice is hereby given that on the cath
day of August, a. d. lSSS, at o'clock y. H., of
County of Alturas aforesaid. l will, in obedience
to said Order OF Sale and Decree of Force losure
and Sale. sell the above. described property or so
much thereof as may be necessary to satisfy said
Judgment. with interest and costs. etc. to the
highest and best bidder for gold coin of the United
States
Dated, Haley, I. T.. July 50, 1888.
P.H, KINNEY,
al Sheriff of Alturas County.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1888-08-16
Probate Notice,

In the Probate Court of Alturss county, Idaho
Territory
In the matter of the Estate Of J. l.. q. Smith, De.
ceased.
Pursuant to an order Of the Judge of said Court
made on the sth day of August. A. D. lSss, notice
| IL hereby given that W. ". Mckay, Administrators
OF the estate Of said deceased, made to the said
Court. and filed In the office Of the Clerk thereof
on said day. return Of sale made by him on the
sth day of August. A. d. 1885, under a previous
| order of said Court of the following real estate
aud for the following sum, tc.wit: The s. W. Il
OF the N. L Il. and the N. W. i OF the 8. T.. n
and the s. +. Il of the N. W. II. and the N. + i
OF the s. W. 4 of Section Is, Township ? N, II. IL
Fast Boise Meridian. with all water. rights and
appurtenancrs connected Herewith, for the sum
Of Eight Thousand ($sOOO) Dollars, as will more
fully appear from said return filed us aforesaid
and to which reference is hereby made for further
particulars.
And notice is hereby given that Saturday, the
Eighteenth day of August, A. d. 1858, at 10 o'clock
III the forenoon, Mt the courtroom Of said Court,
in the town of HALEY County of Alturas has
been iixe for hearing the said return when and
where any per 'un interested in the said estate
may appear and hle written objection to the con.
trn alton If the said sale, and may be heard and
may produce witnesses in support of his object
ions.
Dated August sth A. d. lSss.
tSeal T.. II. LENNON
Probate Judge.
BY +. RICHARDS, Clerk of said Court.