St. Landry democrat. (Opelousas, La.) 1878-1894, 1888-09-29
HISTORY OF ACHILLES.
4 Revised Account of His MANY Confaiess
and His Last Defeat.

| EIsSiS nS VT ASF1tLLESs
4 Revised Account of His Many Confies
and His Last Defeat.
In the intervals of his engrossine
duties as editor of the Olympian Ga
Sette, Colonel Homer wrote poem
called 1.-The Iliad."
Colonel Homer has never received
any royalty ON his book, owing to the
absence OF an international copyright
law
The hero of this little romance OF
the Colonel's was military gentleman
named Achilles.
When he was very small Achilles
mother, who doubtless expected her
son to honor his family by developing
Into baseball umpire, wished, with
true motherly forethought, to render
| him invulnerable to brickbats and
other persuaders.
So she dipped him into the river
Styx, holding him by the heel, which
section OF his understanding was not
saturated.
We pass over the time spent by
Achilles in going to school, and take
up his life again as he approaches man.
hood.
When the capture of Troy seemed
desirable to the Greeks. seer named
Calchas was asked whether or not
that town could be captured, and he
said it could not unless Achilles as
sisted.
Achilles mother, still watchful of
her son, although he was big boy
now and belonged to the militia, feared
he would be fatally killed if he went
to the cruel war, so she sent him to
the court of King Lycomedes.
Here he wore false hair and a hustle,
read Browning's poems, and, in other |
ways, masqueraded as girl.
General Ulysses suspected some
trick OF this sort and resorted to one |
to find whether Achilles was
among the maids.
He offered a choice display of pres
ents to them. Some selected spring
oonnets, others took caramels and
chewing gum, while a few enjoyed
Ulysses liberality to the extent of Sc
Getting dress patterns and jewelry.
But one of the girls took baseball
outfit.
This girl was Achilles.
The hiding scheme thus proving a
allure and no substitutes being allow
'ble, Achilles put on his uniform and
allied for Troy. Soon after his ar
1val he engaged in one of the pro-
oundest sulks ever known.
The magazines of that day were full
t war articles on the subject, in ,
5h1ch different theories were pro-
ounded in explanation of Achilles
1asterly inactivity; but the following I
ecital may be depended upon as Civ f.
lg the true inwardness of the bus ]
less.
Achilles had eloped with a girl I
AIMED Briseis, and had taken her with
i'm to Troy, probably with the inten-
on OF procuring her situation in one
the laundries for which that town T
as famous, and of using her stipend y
) beer money. ~
Another party, named Agamemnon. <
no commanded the third army corps, La
I'd also been engaged in the maiden p
ealing industry. He had abducted -
1ryseius, daughter of one of Apol- -
S priests. This Infatuated Apollo, &C
ID he sent an AL pestilence into the A
eek camp, which displayed great SO
al OF pernicious activity and refused W
leave until Agamemnon sent the
RI back home. TO
ALI would have been serene had the sA
after rested here, but Agamemnon
en- took Achilles girl to fill the va 70
ncy, and the latter got mad. He
A little thing like that annoyed him. its
After that Achilles and Agamemnon s sH
yer saluted each other as thew an
ssed by. tbs
Then Achilles refused to participate =,
the war, but sulked in his tent. ma
lie did nothing but sulk, and drew csc
pay with unerring precision, until ,
,rojan named Hector killed Patro Ho
$, man who used to go to school Pill
n Achilles and play marbles with
q. I
lchilles then thought it was time to Tel
e hand in the fray, to avenge his
'nd's death. +
lie did SO, and for time carried on cHl
rye wholesale business in Trojan
e. L
fter Troy surrendered, Major WE
lilies retired into private life and
anne postmaster of his town.
e was brought into prominence,
ever, by being shot by French Gh1
named Paris, who drew a bead or FLl
heel, Achilles only vulnerable spot. COZ WJf
lTe. | OA1