Orange County observer. [volume] (Hillsborough, N.C.) 1880-1918, 1888-03-24
HUMOR OF THE DAY. !.

Inc rfyht bower Home.
The best corn rcmover-Thc crow.
still hunt-A search for moon shinera.
4 poet sings: Two chords struck"
when he ought to have sung, 1.-Two cords
| sawed "
winding stare Watching your best
girl as you hold her skein OF floss ~ De-
trot Free Prs.
Always approach buzz saw with your
toes pointing in the opposite direction.
Burlington Ere. Pr,Ss.
A young lady has named one of her
admirers lioosac Tunnel because he is
| such an everlasting bore - Warren lO.)
Mirror.
The fact is observed by the Boston
HeraH that we are importing potatoes
from Scotland as we'll as Murphys from
the Old Sod:
| An English art journal has offered a
| prize 20 any one who will discover the
cause Of badness We know, but we
darsen't tell. ~ Darlington Free Psess.
| Tramp Uo woman at the door)-
"Wlll you please gimme a bite, ma'ml"
Woman CLOSING the door -"NO; git
out Pm no dog. BRAKES Magaz,ne.
Father "What do you think Of boy
that throws a banana skin on the side
walk?" Son-'I don't tknow. What do
you think Of banana skin that throws
a man on the sdewak"- Lyr.
A lazy fellow who was dling away his
time was asked by minister where he
expected to 20 when he died 81 shaA
not go,' was the reply; II expect to
| bo rarr;ol R,oL,,nf,,, 7 .,J,r
There is tramp butcher back tho
Yards. Whenever he gets a job Of Kill
ing sheep hc takes the liver and lights
out, and sometimes he succeeds in taking
the skin off, too. - GooitiFs SIM.
Il tell you, these leap year dances are
a fine thing My. wife took inc and paid
all the expenses herself" Nv here did
your wife get the money! "Oh, | let
her have it =" Whu@iie (U.J Heroh.
Ruskin says: 'Man should resemble a
river" We do not know what he
means. but suppose the reason IS that in
order to amount to much in society he
should own a couple Of banks. ~ Loneu
citizen.
Tobacco stems are now being used in
making paper on the principle, we sup
pose, that turn about is fair play all the
straw and old rags having een-utiized
long ago in the manufacture Of cigar
cites - Til BITS
A pae named Itcntzlestezski recently
settled few miles from Bnghamton.
FROM the Jagged appearance Of his name
We should take him 10 be a section OF a
barbed wire fence rather than a pole. -
horrtstorn UerdN
Now the gay unmarried farmer In the even
ing takes his charmrr,
Mary Jane or Sal or Dinah, for some pleas
ant moonlight dri3es
And he tells that yearnlTiS story, always new
though always hoary,
And before tho spring II over she'll have
loinet the ranks of wives
, -Nebruskn .Sta'e .fournd,
Stranger in Detroit Ia hundred years
, hence WHY do all the people stand
: with uncovered heads when that little
) man pa-ses4' Detrotcr Haven't you
{ heard Of him. He's The grea. society
leader He belongs 10 one Of the old
5 families" Stranger "old familiesf
Detroiter ''Ycs. stree. Hi, great grand
father was the first Captain Of the De-
\ | troit nine. -LUe.
a | No, sir. / will have you TO know.
We will bave no vast union dsTo. -
Twill ne'er be our und.-4rved ip.
To haTbor union depot:
care not how loudly you say 50
We're wanting no union dayTo,
We're as far as from Aleppo
From the ghost u union deppo,
! And trust sou dont think that twill be 81
For well have no grand union deepo
From such foreign c0ncoctions we've cmanci
r patton.
Well have an unparalleled union station
-EuFuio Courier.