Mower County transcript. [volume] (Lansing, Minn.) 1868-1915, 1888-09-12
THE BoWsER FAMILY.

1T taken Quit"
"Oh, we'll, do as you please about it,
but / want you to understand one
thing, Mrs. Bowser, I don't propose
that this house shall be all upset just
because you have corn"
''Some husbands would feel sorry"
''Would theyp Well, when a wife
goes at it deliberately and willfully to
cripple herself her husband is an idiot
to pity herv'
Three or four days subsequently, Mr..
Bowser came home an hour ahead of
time. He looked pale and anxious,
and was seriously frightened for the
moment. 3
! ''Is-is mother sick or dead?"
asked, as I met him at the door. -.
Il only wish it was nothing more
serious" EE..&*
what can it bep"
'.Look here!"
: He pulled down his collar and
showed me a red spot on the back of
his neck. and plaintively added:
: II went to the doctor. He says it's
a boil"
well, I've expected it.. Mr.. Bow
ser, you are the most careless man in
Michigan. What on earth could you
have been thinking of?''
Careless! Thinking OFF, he roared.
:'Do you suppose picked this Internal
thing up on some vacant lot, or
bought it at some corner grocery"
well, it's very strange that you
should have boil. You'd better
have it cut off at once. I wouldn't
fool with it two minutes"
He looked at me as if he thought
I'D gone crazy, and then he shut his
teeth together as if determined to say
no more about it. He stood it for two
hours, and was then compelled to say:
Il suppose I'd better get this collar
off and put on a poultice." "
Il presume it would be a good
plan.''
. He waited half an hour more, and
then had to give in and ask:
''Mrs. Bowser, can't you make me a
poultice?'
made him one, and the application
so relieved the pain for few minutes
that he recovered his conceit. Walk
ing to and fro, with his hands under
his coat-tails, he said:
"Shall we go to: the opera this even
ing, Mrs. Bowser, or is that corn of
yours too painful?"
':Are you feeling better?''
''Better! I always feel we'll, Mrs.
Bowser. I shouldn't have noticed this
boil at all if the doctor hadn't hap
pened into the Office. I wish you we're
more of a philosopher on the subject
of bearing pain. You women folks
are" III e..
he stopped there and gave a Jump.
The momentary benefit of the warm
application had passed away, and the
boil was at home again to all callers.
Mr.. Bowser stood it about two minutes
and then groaned.
ANY thing wrong?' asked.
Wrong? Jewhittaker jehosaphat!
but I'm half dead! Mrs. Bowser, I've
got a boil! boil! BOIL! Do you hear
me?'
"Did you happen to notice it your
seif?" I innocently asked.
He crossed over and pumped down
into a rockingchair, and his chin be-
gan to CULVER. When a mans chin be-
gins to work that way it's time to let
up on him. His grit is gone. went
over and smoothed his bald pate, and
encouraged him to hope for the best,
and in little time had him tucked up
On the lounge. He seemed on the
point of going to sleep, when he sud-
denly reused up and asked:
''People often die with boils on the
neck, don't they?"
very seldom"
':Do you think there is any-any
danger in this case?''
"Hardly."
He was quiet again for a few min
utes, and then he groaned out:
MRS. Bowser, can't you keep that
young 'un quiet?"
''He's only talking to HIMSELF
''But he wants to understand that his
father has boil. And there goes that
girl thrashing about the kitchen again.
Go and tell her you'll discharge her
if she doesn't make less noise. It
seems as if there was conspiracy to
kill me OFF,
Next morning the boil had doubled
in size without making any further as
sessment on the stockholders, and Mr..
Bowser was broken in two. When I
got him down stairs and on the lounge
in the sitting-room, his lip hung down
like grocery awning, and he feebly
said: =
':Just bring me little milk toast,
Mrs. Bowser. It will probably be the
last meal shall ever eatv' ..-<
After breakfast he took sudden no.
ton to see the papers. Some of the
reporters had caught on, and there
was an item reading: f.
"Bowser's got one on the neck.
Hang on to it, old chappie-it's good