davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
Tho VVaiters of America

1t is twice as difficult to keep walters under
control here as in European cities. They
have to be constantly watched or they be-
come careess-they lose the manners OF good
walters. The fact is, the average American
diner is the best natured man on earth. The
swells of the highest rank in this country will
accept attendance in the dining room that
would drive a Frenchman into Mysteries.
The full-blooded American, If his digestion is
perfect, will bear any thing with an easy good
nature. If trained waiter from Paris or
London is placed in one Of our leading hotel
or restaurant dining rooms, he is conspicuous
for his Difference and respect. He is polite,
quick and dexterous, and attempts to assist
good digestion by showing desire to please
at every movement. But among American
patrons those habits will wear out in less than
a month if the waiter is not watched closely.
They become lax first, and that step is fol-
lowed by too great familiarity. The leniency
and good nature Of the guests end the talk
and air of the other walters ruins him. no
head waiter can keep large restaurant or
dining room supplied with good help in the
west, and it is little better in eastern cities.
Hotel Boarder in Globe Democrat.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
Darkey and "Dissecting Room"

"Can you give me a few cents toward
gittin' a superb asked negro of a couple
of detectives who were lounging about head
quarters One of the officers, who is the
wittiest and quickest at catching on to
Joke, thought there was some fun to be had,
and Immediately fixed things by saying to
the supphcant. ''You're just the man I
want. Take this package up to the Jefferson
hospital, get on the elevator and deliver it to
DR.. - in the dissecting room. Here's
half dollar for your trouble" AT the men,
ton of ''dissecting room" tie darkey's jaw
dropped and his eyes assumed a scared ex-
preston. He was frightened at the bars
mention of such a thing. 'W-w-won't it do
if leave it down stairs?" asked he. "No,
sir; it will not" was answered. "Well, den,
boss, / guess l don't want no supper" and
with that be vanished, slamming the door
behind him. Such is superstition.-Phila
delnhia Call
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
The Boy Knew How.

A mother on Madison avenue lately re-
quested her daughter, who is just approach
ing womanhood, to give her beau hint thas
she must not sit up later than 10 o'clock.
This the girl was reluctant to do, but her
little brother threatened that unless she did
he would open the parlor door and announce
the maternal edict. The sister supposed that
she had put quietus upon her brother by
reminding him of his playing hockey and
forging his mothers name to excuses from
school to go skating, not forgetting to men
tion the little riding whip his mamma kept
in her room. All this, however, was not
enough to keep the youth from getting even
with Sis beau for not giving him anything
Christmas The other evening he got an
alarm clock with bell as loud as the gong
on the Brooklyn bridge bob, and placed it
under the sofa where his sister and her be-
trothed were to do their spooning. The
hands were pointed at 10. The unsuspecting
girl heard the tick, but took it to be her
lovers Waterbury. He was just tickling her
ear with yarn about horse his papa was
goingto buy when the gong sounded There
was a pause-and then, as though under
standing the meaning, he grabbed his hat
and never stopped running until he struck
The door stoop, when he flew. The boy had
Iced the steps, The little brother now takes
Q cushion to school with him.-Albany
journal. ..-... an II
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
AUTOGRAPHS OF STATESMEN.
Privilege of the Pages in the Capitol.
COngressmen's Signatures.

For years it has been the privilege of the
pages in the Capitol to make quite lot of
pocket money each session in collecting auto
graphs. The pages of the senate, for in
stance, will collect the signatures of all the
senators in an album, turn the book over to
some youngster in the house, who gets the
congressmen's names then to one of the pages
in the supreme court for the autographs of
the justices, and finally to the riding pages of
the senate who are constantly going between
the Capitol, the White House, and the several
departments and bureaus Of the government.
The latter get the names Of the president, the
cabinet and other prominent officials. For
such collection the boy who starts the book
has received whatever he could out of his
customer, trusting to his own sharpness and
the latter's generosity. When he gets his
money-and $40 is the usual price-he settles
with the other pages who have assisted him,
on such terms as they are willing to make.
The ordinary terms of settlement have been
S. to the contractor, So to the house page, 50
to the boy who gets the president and cabi-
net. and 81 to the youth in the supreme court.
But the example of the trades unions has
reached the Capitol, and an equal division Of
profits is now demanded by the boys. I took
an album which had been sent me by a friend
in the west to one of the senate pages the
other day, and asked him to get the auto
graphs of the statesmen for me, as he had
done before. had formerly paid him $40
for such a job, but he informed me that the
boys had organized union and had advanced
the price to SIS. He said that the "kidsn in
the house kicked because the senate bows
were making more money than they, and had
struck; SO it became necessary to organize
and have stated card of rates. i, ss10r U.S.
Don't you see,a he said; ''people who want
autographs somehow always come to the
senate first. We have got IS for getting the
names of seventy-six senator's, and have
given the kids in the house only So for get
ting 325 names. When they happened to
catch on to job they got S., of course, and
gave us So for the senator's autographs, but
for every one book they get we get dozen,
and they kicked about it. So we had to
agree to pay them as much as we got our
selves. They won't touch book less than
S.. There was kid in the house who cut
under them and got some names not long ago
for 8, but when the other boys found it out
they got hold Of the book and tore out Che
leaves. They boycotted him, don't you see"
Washington Cor. New York Tribune.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
He Knew What 1t Was.

The old story of the British tar's account
of his experience at cathedral service
on shore is again being told, and is worth
retelling. He was particularly enthusi-
astic in his description of the singing
Of an anthem whats a hanthelnP
asked listener. What, do you mean
to say you don't know what hanthem
i,r' ''Not me-" swell, then, I'll tell yer.
If was to say to yer, Ere, Bill, give me
that 'andspike,' that wouldn't be hanthem.
But was 1 to say, Bill-Bill-Bill-giv-g
-giv-giv me, Civ me that-Bill, Civ me
that hand give me that, hand, handspike,
spike-spike-Bill, giv-giv me that-that
hand d-handspike, hand-handspike, spike
spike -spike-spike, ah-men, ah-men;
Bill, givmethathandspike, spike, ah-men?
Why, that would be hanthemw-New
York Sun e-
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
Gen. Sheridan's Contributions to History.

Gen. Sher1danS 8 SSOntrlDutIons TO ulstory.
Lieut.. Gen. Sheridan is the only famous
commander of the late civil war who has not
caught the scribbling fever. He has pub
lished little OF nothing of his recollections Of
the war, and has discouraged others from
doing so. His idea is that war recollections
at twenty years. range are not worth much;
that history had better be made out of con-
temporary records and reports He does all
he can to have these preserved and prepared
for the use of the future historian. He care
fully kept the originals or copies of all let
ters kilograms, orders, and so forth, sent or
received by him during the war. Some Of
these were destroyed in the Chicago fire, but
he does not regret this so much as he might,
because it was the cause of his making a
''find" of greater value than all his docu-
ments put together. When he came on TO
Washington, having determined to replace
his lost treasures with copies, if he could do
no better, he was told that he might find in
the attic of the White House some of the tel
egrams that President Lincoln had sent. He
went up there himself, and by delving and
digging got out of a mass of stuff very
large number of President Lincoln's war tel
egrams, addressed not only to him, but to all
the other Federal generals. He had them
removed at once to a safe place, and they
have been well cared for since. The future
historian of the war will have Gen. Sheridan
to thank for some of the best of the material
laid up for him. Washington Letter.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
Points About Horses.

White horses have ever been subject for
superstition. Death is represented as riding
q white horse. ...- ..... .... ,. H..
The horse is distinguished from most other
animals in having an undivided hoof, and in
the singular property of breathing through
the nostrils only and not through the mouth.
In his wild state his ears hang down, but
under the guardianship Of man they become
erect and pointed. In this respect, too, the
horse differs from all other animals. With
them the erect ear is the sign of the savage,
the falling ear the sign Of civilization. So it
seems plain that the true physical beauty Of
the horse, as well as the production Of his full
speed, are due to the wAtchful care Of his
hum1o master.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
A0OUT MEDIEVAL mrIiCINEo.
Curious Cures for Common Complaints.
The "Hagstone's" Many Virtues.


The "Hagstone's" Many Virtues.
A lover of the curiosities of medical 1itera-
ture have unearthed some interesting prac-
tices among the superstitious people of
medieval times. Among other absurdities
of ignorance it was held that chip from
gallows, on which several persons had been
hanged, worn in bag around the neck, was
cure for ague. A halter by which some
criminal had been hung was bound around
the temples as an infallable cure for head
ache. Tumors Of the glands were said to be
''driven away" by nine blows of dead mans
hand, while the hand of a man who had been
cut down from the gallows was said to work
wonders in this particular A ring made
from a coffin was applied for the relief Of
cramps, which were also said to be dispelled
by a rusty sword hanging by the patients
bed. If one had the toothache, one was told
to go and drive nails in an oak tree, which,
it is true, would not kill the pain, but was
sure preventive against future attack.
A stone with hole in it, hung at the head
of ones bed, was said to cure nightmare, the
cause of that evil being thought to be
witches, who sat on the patients stomach;
hence the pendant and stone was called a
''hagstone." The "hagstone" was used gen.
erally as safeguard against all OF the Ills
which are ascribed to impish interference;
and it is astonishing to find many such old
practices, the relics of superstition and
ignorance, still kept up by people who ought
to know better. 1t is, for instance, custom
to this day for people of certain class to
steal meat from the butcher, rub it on warts,
and then bury it, the warts being expected
to vanish as the process of decomposition
sets in. The writer remembers having tried
this when child, at the recommendation of
a servant girl but, it is needless to say, with
very unsatisfactory results. Only stolen
meat, and beef notably, was held to be effi-
cacious. q
Pricking wart with a pin till the blood
came and then throwing the pin away was
also said to drive warts away, the warts
being promptly transferred to the hands of
whoever picked up the pin. A potato car
ried in the pocket is still recommended to
rheumatics and hundreds of like practices
are in vogue at the present day among the
poor and ignorant, especially the immigrants
of the peasant class, with whose ridiculous
remedies the physician often hiss to deal with
summary severity.-Medical Register
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
Ladies' Buying Goods by Sample.

Ladies living in small towns end villages
miss much of the pleasure that makes life
worth living to their city sisters by being un-
able to visit the great bazars Of trade and
do their shopping for themselves However,
if they are not content to buy their goods by
sample, they can procure anything they need
or desire through the medium Of purchasing
agencies in New York, which will guarantee
to forward any article, from an anchor to a
needle, or to match any shade of dress goods,
and will obtain information on any conceiv-
able subject. Some agents make daily, tri-
weekly or weekly trips to the city from out
lying districts and fill all orders consigned 70
them.-New York World e-ffT .t
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
Helena, Montana, Thursday, March 8, 1888
STORIES ABOUT MEN.
Ex-Governor MagOfin's Interesting Talk
with a Deaf and Dumb Man.

Ex-Governor MagOfhn's Interesting Talk
with a Deaf and Dumb Man.
Ex-Governor Beniah Magoffin, of Ken
lucky, got in the train one day at Frankfort
to go to Lexington. He sat down by the side
of very handsome, intelligent looking
young man. The governor, who was great
talker, at once began to chat. The young man
listened well, apparently, nodding his head
from time to time, as if he agreed with the
governors views, but it seemed that he
couldn't find room to put in word. This
continued until they reached Lexington,
when .ordial hand shake and an exchange
of cards took place. Subsequently, in the
corridor of the Phoenix hotel, the governor
was telling party of friends about the meet
ing, saying the young man was one OF the
most agreeable fellows he ever encountered.
perhaps some of you know him." said he,
che has one brown and one gray eye. But
stop, have his card!'
"Why, governor" said one of the party,
''that was Bob King; he's deaf and dumb.
Everybody ..nows him!" - Philadelphia
Times.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
IIolasses and Fish Cakes.

A tall and stout visitor to the Astor house,
in New York, ordered Goldfish cakes and
placidly instructed the waiter that he want
ed some molasses. He was particular to
state that he didn't want sugar or maple
syrup-he wanted molasses. He poured the
molasses over the fish cakes, and seemed to
relish them. "Oh, that's nothing" remarked
the waiter to another visitor; zone OF our
patrons is stuck on sardines and ice cream,
and another insists on thin layer of English
mustard on his pumpkin pie. Good House
keeping.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
"Tha Court Does Not Lunch"

a~.~...ca SouIi,r1 1ni. OusIice Ddyls
court, in the queens bench, applied to his
lordship to adjourn a case until after the
luncheon time'' of the court, as the plaintiff
had telegraphed that he had missed his train.
Mr. Justice Day-You should ask that the
case be postponed until after 'the adjourn.
mept," for ''the court" does not lunch; that
is not an epoch in the life of ''the court" I"
Laughter do not speak of what individ-
uals do, but 'the court does not lunch
London Telegraph.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
~. near. Unselfish Creature.

Mr.. Sampson passionately)-I love you
devotedly, Miss Chumley, but my pecunlary
affairs have prevented my making deciara-
t;ou u,til now. But have put away enough
now to feel justified in asking you to be my
MI Miss Chumley (hesitating but sweetlyl-I
,o,,foSs that I am not wholly indlfferent 10
"But what, dear" d. ,,
"Would YOU mind telling how much you
have put awayT'-Te1as Sift'ngs'
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
To Treat an Ingrowing Nail.

A painless method Of treating an ingrow-
ing nail is to draw a woolen yarn under the
corner of the nail, leaving both ends project
ing, and let it remain thus until the nail has
grown free from the flesh. A little mutton
tallow may be used to soften the flesh about
the nail, and in trimming the nail allow tbs
corners to project little beyond the flesh.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
Something Like Civilization.

A tipsy man entered cottage Grove
avenue car, threw his arms around the
heater pipe, steadied himself, and exclaimed:
Snow, this s-somethin' Like. This civ'llsh-
ashun, Shum hu-humanity bout thish.
] thought when they talked bout heatin'
town with cash how nice twould be to have
lampposts warmed Thish IS greatV-
Chicago Herald
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
Artist Whistler and Oscar Wilde.

A Boston artist tells this story Of Whistler
end Oscar Wilde, who has the reputation of
borrowing Whistler's bright speeches. Hav-
ing heard the artist say an unusually good
thing Oscar exclaimed deploringly: ~ wish
l could have said that" "Oh," replied
Whistler derisively, "but you know you will
say it."-Boston Herald.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
Anxious to Please.

Landlady Ito her star boarder, whom she
is anxious to please)-May l send you some
of the turkey, Mrs. De Hobsons
Star boarder-Yes, thanks; leg, if you
please. ~. ..
Landlady-Will you have the right or
the left leg, Mrs. De Hobson?-The Epoch.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
A VENEZUELA COUNTRY INN.
Airy Rooms with Stone Floors-Bats as
Room Mates-Eatables.

Room AIates-Eatables.
The usual country inn all over Venezuela
reminds me of those of Mexico, Spain and
even northern Africa, for the Moors intro
duced their mode of living and travelling into
Spain, and the Spaniards adopted it for their
own country as well as for the colonies, which
they founded only few years after the
downfall of the Moors. All these poSadas,
or fondas, or fonditas, are built in square
shape, with an interior courtyard, frequently
adorned with flower beds and palm trees and
surrounded by galleries. The traveller, after
descending from his horse, is usually shownt to
one of the few large, airy rooms, with stone
floor and high ceilings, in which three or
four folding beds, consisting of piece OF
canvas stretched over a wooden frame.
and probably one or two chairs, are the
only pieces of furniture. In larger towns
of 6OOO to 5000 inhabitants there will be
even a wash table, but its presence is not In
sisted upon by the weary traveller, who can as
well do his washing in the river or the acequ1a.
Sometimes one room has to be shared with
two or three fellow travellers, invariably
men, for stopped at posadas where female
travellers have not been seen for years.
There are of course, no glass windows IN any
of the country "hotels," but the windows are
barred with heavy iron gratings and wooden
slaves On convenient places under the cell
ing there are iron hooks and rings, for the
wealthier traveller frequently carries his own
hammock, on which, suspended across the
room, he prefers to pass the nights sheltered
against the attacks OF centipedes. scorpions
or minor bloodthirsty things but without
defense against bats, some OF which ere very
large. did not sleep in many rooms with
out few bats as room mates. Even IN pr1-
vate houses on the haciendas Of the wealthier
planters they fitted about the room. When
they became too familiar and approached
MY face got up, and, shaking sheet, drove
them out of the window: but they invariably
returned, without, however, ever settling
down on my face.
One might be able to keep snoring fellow
travellers out of the room by engaging all the
beds, but sometimes, when guests are numer-
Gus and accommodations scanty, one cannot
help sharing the room with them. The al
muerzo and the comida are not the best, but
there are always eggs, chicken, salad and
coffee to be had. while in the larger towns
red wine is included in the meals and not
paid for extra. The reader will probably not
be tempted to undertake any travels in Ven
ezuela. but must confess that l Jared worse
| in many countries with the reputation OF be-
| ing far more civilized than our sister repub-
| lie. Travellers, after riding on horseback
| day after day, sometimes for weeks, are usu-
| ally SO tired that they WIN sleep anywhere
! and SO hungry that they will eat anything.
| As a precaution against accidents l invaria-
| blv carried bottle of brandy and few
tablets of chocolate along.-E. De Hesse
| Warteg.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08
The Iron Hand.

The fact that the king of Sweden has issued
volume of his poems shows very clearly
that the Swedes are a patient and long suf-
fering people.-New Orleans States.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08

1t is estimated that discoveries, inventions,
and compounds patented each year in the
United States and never amounting to any
thing coet S3,0O0,OOO.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08

The late Gen. Mckee Dunn left all his
fortune to his wife. His will was the shortest
ever filed in Washington, and consisted OF
four lines.
Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1888-03-08

\ well wisher is one who invests in oil ter
ritory.
Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1888-12-06
OBITUARY

Although the death of Miss Mamie
Flint occurred few weeks since, word
in addition to the brief notice then given
of the sad event may not be inappropriate.
With the dying of the summer foliage a
sweet young life went out. and the bright
face and familiar form are no more seen
among us. just past her twentieth year,
the summer came when life was sweetest
and most gladstone.
The immediate sickness which took her
from US was of only about years dura-
ton; aud so courageously had she met
every step of the experience, and so care
fully had loving friends kept their worst
fears from being spoken, that all Were
surprised when it was known that the
end was so near. So patiently did she
bear the pain and WEAKNESS and discom-
fort of those many months. that it almost
seemed, at times, to the loving watchers.
that it would be relief and a hopeful
symptom to hear some word OF fretful-
ness or complaining. With wonderful
fortitude, in one so young, aud so loving
life, were the stealthy advances of the
dark-winged messenger patiently met.
But when the sun of her life finally went
down, it was indeed like the coming
twilight, so softly did she descend into
the dark valley. She breathed. and
breathed no more.
All her wishes had been expressed, and
with quiet service i'm her home, at which
only those who cared most for her, and
most truly sympathized with the SORROW
ing parents and friends were present.
the bodily tabernacle was laid away.
Beautiful flowers were there in profu-
sion: loving friends lowered tearfully
over the qu.et form lying so peacefully
in its last sleep: and over all sounded the
words of Divine assurance, II am the res
urrectionand the lfen - whatsoever
liveth and believeth in me shall never
die" And because Mamie had lived
and had believed in the Christ, and had
been upheld in the months of trial by
that faith, we are persuaded that for her
to depart and TO be with Christ was far
better. The church and the Sabbath
School i'm which she worshipped will
miss her much; the circle of young as
sociates will deeply feel her absence; but
the heart desolstion of the stricken par
ents is too sacred to touch with words.
May they be upheld by that Divine
strength which human supplies cannot
furnish,
Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1888-12-06
HARTFoRp.

Louis Newton and Ona Pease, who are
attending school at st. Johnsbury came
home to spend Thanksgiving.
Ernest Bugbee has returned from his
visit to Mass.
The topic of the c. f. meeting Tines
day evening was Christ's Personal Com
mands.
l. Gates contemplates building anoth-
er chair shop soon.
Jason Moffit has moved into Mr..
JCaswell's house.
Our village schools began Monday
with the same board of teachers.
b. d. Stone is very sick with pneu-
monia.
Periey Hazen and wife of st. Johns
bury spent Thanksgiving with his moth
er, Mrs. Edward Hazen.