The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1888-10-20
PuNoENT PARAGRAPHS.


Washington has Summer home
for CATS" It is said to be surrounde3
by a caterwaul. -Norristoscn Herdtd.
in polite circles the word "drunk
or Intoxicated" is no longer used
..Overestimated his capacity y the
proper thing.-Epoch.
-"Look out for number one" Is hko
the baseless fabric Of dream TO 2
widow on the qui vire for a second hus-
band. Binghamtos Republican.
st. Louis man witnessing Julius
Cesar )-"Do you notice, my dear
with what stately grace Brutus moves
about?' Wife-"Yes, and he Is IN ms
night-gown, too. It's wonderful"
Some one says that an umbrella
will last much longer II it Is placed
with the handle downward to dry 10
preserve it still longer, attach 1t 70
your body with long chain and pad
lock.-Norristown Herald.
1t is not always easy to tell whether
or not a woman really means what she
says; but this rule does not apply when
she is expatiating on the accomplish
ments of her baby. She may be mis-
guided. but she is always perfectly
sincere. -Someruille Journal.
-"All the men arc not fools, any
how" snapped Mrs. CURLY to her hus-
band during little domestic discus-
sion. mo. my DEAR" replied. Mr.. O.,
with tsue manly politeness. mo,
there ara few bachelors left as sam
pies. - Washington Critic.
Police Observation-Disclosures How
do you like your new house out In the
suburbsa" Jones-s'The only objection
have to It is that it is SO far to the
police station in case OF burglars
.sWhy didn't you rent house near
saloon? You can always find police
man hanging around there. "-Isrds
Siftings.
Dominic (tc choir leader Tho
collection this morning, Mr.. Hotwater.
was very small, and am sorry to say
that think the meagrenels was largely
due to you. Choir Leader Largely
due to me, sir?" Dominie-''Y Yes
Hereafter, while the plate Is being
passed, wish you would try and make
better selection of music than SAL
vation's Free. ~ 7. sam.
Mrs. Lenox Hill, Jr. (getting ready
to leave town)-s'Lenox, whore shall I
hide these silver spoons, in case thieves
break In? DO you think between the
mattresses would be good placer
Mr.. Lenox Hill, Jr. (who knows what
he is talking about Nonsense! Put
them into one OF your dress pockets In
the closet, and II a burglar finds that
he deserves the spoons! Pack.
Somewhere down East . married
pair were in the habit Of airing their
differences audibly. In these spnts the
wife, having the longer tongue, was
usually the winner. Tho result was
made known in one case to an inquir-
ing neighbor (who asxed whore he
could find Mr.. McBlank) In these
words: II don't know; I guess he's up
stairs hatin' hisself. Boston 1r0n-
script.
4uO uyROos OVoOt - . RVueAA0AAA
Missouri paper apologetically, made
us allude last week to our esteemed
townsman, Mr.. Polhemus, as = Villain
GUS lounger. We wrote versatile law
YER The error was overlooked by our
proof-reader, gentleman recently
from Texas, who assures US, In extern
uation Of the oversight, that the two
terms mean pretty much the same
thing where he came from"
-Clergymen should be brief and 70
the point A Boston clergyman once
lad a broad hint to that effect. I'VE
would like to have you short whom you
marry us" said prospective bride-
groom, because we are going West.
"How soon after the ceremony will you
startP" asked the clergyman. ssIn
about q week. was the reply. Then
the minister realized he had q reputar
ton as one possessing tho gift Of con-
tinuance. HdrDerss Ma1nzi,,e.