The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1888-08-10
MEAN MEN MEET.
THEY TELL WHAT HAS BEEN DONE
THE LAST YEAR.

Awarded to Mr.. .SrnalIfcIlow.
AT the annual gathering Of the Mean Mer
OF the country few days ago. tho palm Of
the order, which Is voted TO the member who
can provo himself guilty Of the most despic
able act, was awarded to Mr. Smalfe,low
Tho meeting was an interesting one and tho
attendance was larger than ever before IN
the history Of tho society.
After banquet, the regular business WAS
taken up. Tho competition for the pain was
very close, and some fair samples of mean
ness were reported. During the wear all the
members had found opportunity to make ali
enort 70 secure the prize, and, as is the Gus
tom, each gentleman wrote out a statement
OF the affair and handed It TO the secretary
Some or the members had made ont az
many os ten reports, and much discussion
was caused py motion To consider five or
more ordinarily mean acts ON the same BASH
as one OF very despicable nature Three
gentlemen seconded the motion. but when the
ayes and noes were called FOR, il was voted
down
The reports were read by the secretary and
showed the members to have been very os
siduous III their efforts to secure the palm
They were OF rather entertaining character
and elected much applause. IL took over
TWO hours to read them all, and during that
time the members were conyulsed with
merrinent at the manner in which some Of
tho fellows had sought to maintain their
standing in the sociSy The papers were too
numerous to be published in full. Only ex.
tracts from those which received honorable
mention can be given.
MIR. Hogg reported having changed the
piacard on q paralytic's hand organ. Tho
unfortunate mendicant showed a printed
notice which read:
Paralyzed bya
Blast in the mines
Mr.. Hoggs store was in close proximity In
tho hand organ, and by the use of n pair OF
scissors and some glue he made the placard
10 read:
Paralyzed bya
Blast In the newspapers.
REPORT received with cheers1
MI. i1osts paper was to the effect that the |
writer had taken the tomahawk from the |
hand OF an Indian used for cigar store sign.
This report was Kissed by some of the mem
bers, but the committee on awards declared
1t worthy Of honorable mention.
Nj. wigs report showed that that gentle
man mad tried to pass counterfeit quarter
on a bind man. The latter arose. SO tho
paper read, and, shifting the earth with the
writer, stated that he had been watching the
'endeavors OF man who was mean enough
totry TO deceive blind beggar" Mr. Wigg
showed black eye he had received In the
fray with the fellow.
Mr.. Stump stated that he had discovered a
means OF beating the defenseless weighing
machine that stands in hotels. railway sta
tlonS ana other public places He said it was
ms custom to weigh himself every twenty
hve minutes, and he was $50 IS ahead of the
game. loud applause]
-dr. Iobes' report was to the effect that he
had bought dozen red wigs, and hired q
number OF young women to wear them ON |
inc street, thus causing the already over.
worked and sad eyed white horse much I'M
necessary running. Cheers
The secretary read in a very droll way tho
paper handed in by Mr.. Fickes This member i
received the palm last year, and it was
thought he would TIT again. when it would
pass into bis S6ssession entirely. it being the !
fdiBef the, society to present the prize to any
Ecnt.emnn winning it twice in succession. !
Tho paper, however, was a disappointment
Mr.. Fickes had given "a poor woman pass to :
when she asked for bread. !
Considerable enthusiasm was awakened +
when Mr.. Whnstone's report was given out :.
DC had been secretary for a year, and was i
considered one of most prominent and mean =
st men in the society. He reported that no u
lad remained at his club one night, but sent II
couple of parquet circle tickets to his wife II
md mother-in-law. When the ladies arrived u
how fhot no ol,o - | VI
zen issued for the night previous. (Storm
f applause.l Ascend report by Mr. Whin- a.
tone was to the effect that he had sent q -
argc bouquet Of La France roses to the same u
ldies by messenger boy, confidently expect 81 81
ne that they would wilt and wither before o
he youth reached the house. [Cheers were
a!sed when tho secretary read that the gen
eman's fondest hopes had been realized.l i,
Many of the members were in favor Of do 81 81
Iaring the writer of the last report the u
leanest man in the society, and loud calls p
cro made for him to make a speech Mr. VI
'hinstone would have given further evil ~ IN
cnce of his fitness for the honored place had VI
Of the president ordered the secretary to Va
,ntinue reading the reports ."
This ruling was received with favor, and as
10 members became good tempered again as s.'
icy listened to the papers. When Mr.. Small az
flows was reached the gentlemen became "a
lid with enthusiasm. The report of this 'n
embef stated that the writer had been in ,h'
ted to attend friend in his last sickness la
I'd when alone by the dying man had drunk ga
$ negus. lGreat applause] In the morn an
& the friend died, and Mr.. Smallfellow re- ier
owed from his back a porous plaster that s'o
'd been put there the night before and Pl'
hich was not much the worse for wear. WI
As the members greeted this last statement
Q scene was an inspiring one. Hats, hand ne
rchiefs and canes were waved and cheer on ues
ecr fractured the air. After the enthu- me
ISM had somewhat tired itself, the palm III
as unanimously awarded to Mr.. Smallfel- tur
". The members then adjourned to meet ma
10 year f4om date II is more than coll
;ely the general public will make tho &C snf
aintance of some Of the gentlemen.-San GO
ancisco Chronicle.
----------------- T.
Utilization. y