The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1888-02-13
BRIGHT BITS.

TIVE a fellow feeling in my bosom, said the
tramp, as he awOke and found his partner
fumbhng In his vest.-Tid Bits.
TIE air brake is great thing in this country.
When theInercury drops 509 1t needs something
of that kind to soften the fall -Pdrdgrdpher.
NIAGARA EAxDLoRD-You look tired and
thirsty Won't sou have glass of water?
Cautious Visitor who has read about the falls
How much is it?--Bufdlo DRIFT
Truth may lie at the bottom of well, but
out IN Chicago there seems to be great deal Of
lying about the bottom of a well, said to con
tain natural gas NorristOwH Herald.
FRANKLIN Mills Ordering the cigars at pop
ular cafe)-What's your brand, Jack?
Jack Stsares (trOm Texas, between gulpS)-
Cross an arreT in diamond on right haunch an
left horn tip sawed off.-Pttck.
HUSBAND (groanng) rheumatism in my
leg is coming on again.
Wife with synipathy)-Oh, I am so sorry.
John. wanted to do some shopping to-day
and that is a sure sign of rain Epoch.
THE Empress of Russia has a sewing machine
of solid silver, bat that nothing A Sommer
vile lady has a sewing machine of solid gold,
and she uses it daily, too 1t is thmble and
1t cost "a 90 net.-.SoDlerCHte Journal
FIRST Texan don't believe that yarn about
Martin blowing out the gas in Washington.
Second TeXan-l don't neither. Every burned
fool knows the properest way is TO wet your
fingers and put it out, You know they got up
bath.-IerGS SJtut9s
MISS DE SocIErY-O, mother, such news. The
Olafams have lost all their money and their
head dish washer has fallen heir to a fortune
Mrs. De Society-How fortunate we heard of
it in time. When call at the Oiafam resi-
dence this afternoon must remember to go
around to the back doOr-Ontdhd WOrlf.
MAMMA" inquired little Waldo Bunker, of
Boston, who is spending the winter in Florida,
what is that body of water?'
The Atlantic ocean, my dear"
THE Atlantic ocean, exclaimed little Waldo
in amazement why | thought the Atlantic
ocean was near Bostonr-NeW York Sun.
mo, my girl said old Aunt Sally, sit isn't
a pleasant thing for woman to live without a
husband in this world. If it hadn't been for
my parents I'd married good man But
listened to them, and I've been chewing the
bitter end of disappointment all these years"
''Is it possiblef" ejacnlated the fair young
boarding school girl why don't you switch
off on gumy'-Jlldge
PAPA" said beautiful girl, 81 found several
cigars scattered about the front yard this morn
ing. Did you drop them?'
mo, they don't belong to me, - responded the
old man. shortly after young Sampson left
you last night thought heard a noise outside,
and shouldn't be surprised if Nero had been
shaking him for the cigars. Evidently the dog
won. N-Ne1c York sun.
A LONG. lean, green countryman named
Westbrooks presented himself some time ago at
the general delivery department of the post
Office and in a mandatory tone of voice said:
Gimme my paper" ''All right, sir, " responded
Evs, whats your name?" 'Aw! my names
on the paper, impatently and petulantly ans
wered the fellow, with facial expression which
showed that he thought the postmaster was
asking very unnecessary question.-Pdrk city
Times