Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1888-06-27
IN a DRUG STORE.
"A Place where Some Funny Things Occur
"A Fellow who Put pills in His Eye.


A Place where Some Funny Things Occur
"A Fellow Who Put pills Ia His Eye.
II any ono Is interested In the eccentrici
tics Of tho gssss homo, a drug store Is q
good place In which TO study them.
Ned tells capital stories, but / have seer
incidents In his store better than the best
story ne could invent.
spent an hour there the other evening
First, watched Ned while nc did fifty cents
worth Of talking 10 sell q ten-cent tooth.
brush. Then / unused on the ways Of the
fair sex in n commercial transaction: for
after he had put the brush into a neat little
box and done IL up, the girl concluded not
20 takeit, because he wouldn't agree 20 let
her exchange 10 II she found it too stiff on
trying 10 use Il.
Ned glanced az me with a ock-heroic ex.
preston, but returned brush and box 70
their places without a word, and turned "a
attend 20 the next customcr-evidently "a
citizen from the rural district"
" Ia this ere JohnsOn's drug storep
"Yesu
edward L. Johnsoni"
ayes"
After an exhaustive study Of a small
book in his hand, the ruralite started again /:
"Sign Of the Golden Mortarin
Yes; any thing in our linep'
avail, yes; you keep 'sificsi"
Excuse me; didn't undertand."
Doughheads' 'siics; you sell 'eml"
"Oh, ID. o. Heads Specific. Yes, GER
tainly; we keep a full line"
" Lfnef Amt they pillsi"
Yes, yes; mean we have all of them"
"Be they made by Doughhead himselfl"
"Oh, yesr
" Sure they's genoowinelp
Yes; what number do you wantr'
BE some on 'eIn good fer fevernagerl"
eyes; No. %. Would you like bottle?n
How much be theyl"
Fifty cents.n
Can't you let me have 'eln fer fortylp
No; can't possibly. Ned was fast los
ing his usually cordial manner, for four
other customers were waiting).
"Forty-five contslr
% No; fifty cents is the regular price, and
never cut prices"
wall, my wife he'd fevernager bad last
spring. Thought ia AK the price Of them
little pills, SOS If she he'd It aQin mex,
spring might git 'em fer herr
" Is that alli' Ned had dropped all
semblance OF cor1iality by thus time1.
Wall, no, I've got sore eyes"
"Yesl Would you like some eye-waterT'
CTone little less freezing).
" No; got cheated on some onct.n
Something else for them, thenP
Got any pills for sore eyesp,
"D o. Heads Specific, No. AN
"Be they any goOdi"
"Thcy are highly recommended.n
How much win you let me have bottle
form On very confidential tone).
twenty-five cents"
IF take more be they eheaperrp
Yes. five bottles for n dollarn
"That's twenty cents apieoep
"Correct.n
centsr,
"No; can't possibly
"Wall, I'll take one bottle IL you're scott
sure they's genooine.n
Yes, perfectly sure"
bow many do you takelr
ally.n ~ y
The pills and the quarter change hands
Ned hastens TO his other customers and
Haysced drifts toward the door.
In about fifteen minutes hear the tramp
OF heavy boots, and see the rustic, with a
determined look in ono eve, the other bein0
covered BY a dirty red handkerchief. He
comes 20 me.
where's the bossr'
Putting up prescriptions
Ned emergcs from behind the prescrip,ion
case and Is greeted with:
Say, young man, how long does It take
them ere pills TO mcltfn
"Five or ten minutes.n
"Wan, You can't expect me TO keen the
pesly things in my eye no longer. / put
Tour on 'em In there, and, by the way they
hurt, don't believe a blamed one has
melted up"
I'm your cyel you should let them dissolve
In your mouth
'Jewwhitakerl II that amt the blamedest
way 70 take eye medicine ever heerd ON
Amid our shouts, the man from the in
terror departs, calling down malcdictions on
~Doughhcad and his doggoned 'sifics.n
ARlsrINE AxDERsoz.