Abilene weekly reflector. [volume] (Abilene, Kan.) 1888-1935, 1888-12-27
MISCELLANEOUS.


gophers, purchased large number and
set them at liberty on his land.
Several boys when arrested in New
York the other day, were working in
dustriously, as they afterwards ex-
planned in court, to create a haunted
house scare.
The last society spoken of in Cali
fornia is the "Pay-Nothings." It is
said to be alarmingly prosperous. The
password is, Lend me DOLLAR" the
response, "Broker'
Whats the most convincing proof
that you know of" asked the philo-
sophical tramp, 'that man possesses
an inherent right to .own property"
"a bulldog in the front yard" prompt
ly replied his companion.-C Chicago
Globe.
Mistress Ito servant)-'Look at
the dirt on that chair, Bridget. Your
work is shockingly neglected this
week" 81 know it is, mum; but I've
been too busy to attend to it, shure.
I'm a candidate for the Boord av Iddi-
cashun, mum, and have to canvass my
ward. "-Teras Stttings.
Uncle Cuffy-"Which is the cheap
est, de fiy-blister or de poor-house
plaster?" Druggist-'Just the same
twenty-five cents apiece Uncle c.
We'll, doctor, you better give me all
two; my old CONAN is berry low wild
de remonia; an Iwant um fur hab eb'rY
comfort. ''-Detroit Free Press.
Crooked aud Straight are the
names of a pair of clergymen in charge
of an English church. Lock & Key
were long familiar names over the door
of hardware store in Louisville, Ky.
Scarcely less appropriate were the last
named parties to their business than
were the famous U. Ketchum & i.
Cheatum firm of lawyers.
Enthusiastic Traveler-"Ah. En-
gland is a glorious country indeed. A
nation of conquerors, possessions
everywhere all over the globe, enor-
nous financial resources; why, you
know they say the sun of Victoria
never SETS" Mrs. Porkehoppe (of
Chicago)-'1 want to know, don't he
ever get tired of standing?"-Iown
Topics.
"A contest has been going on in a
New York newspaper between a num-
Der of young wemen for the honor of
being the youngest grandmother in the
country. 1t has been shown by the let
tiers of the contestants that a woman
who was grandmother at the age of
thirty-two is by no means an unusual
parsonage in this country.
"A few days ago Mr.. Davis, of st.
Augustine, Fla, heard bell tinkling,
and couldn't tell from what quarter it
came until he looked in the air and
saw a buzzard with small brass bell
around his neck. He shot the buzzard,
and on examination saw an indistinct
date, 1885," on the bell. He thinks
it must have been hung there by old
Menendez.
An oil expert from Pennsylvania
under the soil of California than in
Pennsylvania itself. He finds that the
ledge of oil-producing rock begins at
Peru, crops up at San Diego, then dips
and reappears at Santa Barbara, and
again appears at San Francisco and
further north.
The meanest man in Kansas has
been found. He lives in Reno County,
and in writing to the treasurer of
Sedgwick County in a matter pertain
ing to his taxes, he used postal card
that had done duty once before and
spent at least three hours in effacing
the address, stamp, and first message
from off the card. The postal is to be
framed and hung up in the treasurer's
Office as a memento of mans avarice.
-Wichita Kan. Journal.
in letter from Salt Lake City de-
scriptive of the Mormon Tabernacle,
Mrs. Julia Ward Howe writes: "a
glance at the congregation easily cor
roborated the statement that Mormon
ism largely recruits itself from the
most wretched and ignorant classes of
European countries. Some of the head
of those present might have been termed
well advanced on the way back to the
gorilla. Vacant countenances, eyes
empty of thought were seen on every
side"
1t was rather queer remark that
a Buffalo IN. " business man made
lately. Said he, II can get better
bargain in any store in this town if 1
don't pay as go than can for cash,
and what is still more to the purpose,
can command better treatment and bet
ter service while am making the pur-
chase. The moment my money goes
over the counter the interest in prompt
delivery and such accessories mnst all
fall back on the character of the house I
am dealing with. But if do not pay at
once 1 am still customer to be looked
after and every thing will be done to
retain my good will.
"A Boston sportsman who has been
enjoying the sport at Moluncus Lake.
in the northern part of Maine, entered
> lumberman's house and was well en-
tertained during the night In the par
lor of the house was the lumberman's |
library, which the visitor had the curl |
osity to examine. The list was as fol- |
lows: Lives of Eminent Saints"
mysteries of Paris" Robinson |
Cr,,coo - saC,,ro Warr 20, o. Iox,,,.- A..