St. Paul daily globe., 1888-07-31
63s Nineteenth street, but fortunately
no one was Struck, although fully a
dozen persons we're about the house.
A WILD WESTERN WEDDING
Effective Coupling Of a Wyoming
Pair by q Justice of the Peace.

Effective Coupling of a Wyoming
Pair by Justice of the Peace.
Yonkers Statesman
1t appears that one Jonas Burton had
been chosen justice of the peace of one of
the small Wyoming towns, not because
he was possessed of any special quail
fications for the Office, but on account of
his personal magnetism, which had
about it all those qualities which go to
make the yellow dog thing of beauty
and a joy forever to the lovers of pure
cuSsedneSs. Among other functions of
his office Hon. Jonas one day found him
self called upon to join in "bonds of
paddock" as matrimOny is sometimes
called in the West, raw young couple
from up the country.
His honor was appalled, at the situa-
ton. He could commit horse thief to
the gallows with all the elegance and
1mpressiveness Of manner which that
act demanded. He could sentence a
man to Jail for life for holding five aces
In his hand at poker, without turning
hair, but as to ''marryin' folks, he
wasn't in it, be gOsthlemitely But as
justice of the peace he had to do it, and
his perturbation of spirit was dreadful
to witness.
About an hour before the ceremony
was to take place the correspondent,
accompanied by one of the leading citi-
zens of the place, Mr.. Stiles, was sent
to the squire's cabin, and found him
poring over large volume of the stat
utes of Wyoming, swearing like horse.
and looking terribly anxious. After
greeting the callers, he said:
"Stiles, the burned galOots that got
up these yer laws hadn't gumptiOn
enough to last them over night. I've
run through the blamed book half
dozen times, an can't find dod blasted
word about matrinony, or how tina
hitchin' process is proceeded with. I've
just got to put the clamps on this
couple, hit or miss, an eff l don't yoke
'em up legal l can't help it,"
you can. Any kind of a ceremony will
do in this country, for people never
question the legality of the thing. I'll
post you as well as | can"
Stiles then explained to him about
how he should proceed, and the old man
thought, finally, he could worry through
it. Ere long the couple appeared, fol-
lowed by crowd of the citizens of the
camp. The candidates stood up before
the old squire, who said:
''Feller citizens, this var man an this
var woman have appeared before this
court to he hitched in legal bonds of
knows of anything that mout block the
game eff TUX to higher court, let him
toOt his bazOo, or else keep his jaw to
himself now and forever more. All in
law say T."
Everybody said 81"
Contrary mo-"
Nobody said mo"
The motion is carried unanimously,
an the court rules that thar hain't
nothin' to prevent the trying of the
case. Grip, your fins" The candidates
joined hands. "AmOs Peabody, do you
sOlemnly sw'ar that you'll freeze to
MANDY forever and ever? That you'll
love 'er and provide for 'er, an treat Ter
square an white, accOrdin' to the rules
an regulations sot down to govern sich
cases in the laws O. the United States,
so help you GOd?'
'Yaas, sir; do, Sir.''
THAT fixes your end O. the bargain.
MANDY Thomas, do you soiemnly
swa'ar thet ye'll hang or to Amos for
all comm time; thet yell nuss him in
sickness and be square to him in we'll
honest. up an up wife, under the pen
atty prescribed by the laws for the pun
ishment of sich offenses; do ye swa'ar
this, so help you GOd?''
II ar | will"
''Ihen by the power in me vested as
justice O. the peace, in and fur this pre-
clnct, pronounce you, Amos Peabody,
husband, an you, Mandy Thomas,
wife, an legaliZe We to remain as such
now and furevermore; an yell stand
committed till the fees an costs in the
case be paid in full, an may God have
mercy on your souls an bless this union
with his heftiest blessin's.''
The fees and costs were adjusted, and,
after receiving the congratulations of
the assembly, the newly made husband
and wife departed for their cabin up
the creek.