Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1888-01-21
A "FORT'NIT" BID.
Josiah Baitlett's Investment at an
ION Hand" Sale.

oo0iaA DeItlettS Investment at al
ION Hand" Sale.
snow Josiah Bartlett, don't YOU q,
toolln' round tibet deceivin' ON Hand
sale! said Melissa Bartlett, a tall, an
sular woman with sharp ferreting eyes
a sharp nose. and a general air of cal
chIat!on and management about her.
"Now MISSY, don't bust yer biIer,'
replied the husband, soothingly, ''ther'
be u t'rifc Explosion some of thes,
days eff We don't stop gittin' up Sc
much steam. Now why kint | ste,
inter tibet inherent On Hand sale
talnt noways likely ez the 'xpres.
companyn auction off any WORTHLESS,
packages, an who knows but I'll ge'
you a black silk dress pattern, lik,
neighbor Jonsing ded last year" he
added, ~persuasively.
silk dress pattern, indeed" saiC
Melissa, her sharp nose curling upwarC
in the extremity of her disdain, "mor,
like yell bring home a coffin plate. Ell
a pair o dancin' shoes, err a tombstur
wcth another mans name cut intcv
1t; I've got your auction performance,
all by heart, Josiah Bartlett" she pur.
sued, in a higher key, as the memor,
OF past grievances rose up before her.
An jest the other day you wuz
brcggin' what a capytil doorstep tibet
tombstun made" said the old man.
triumphantly, IAN | cuddent a got a
stun doorstep fur bubble what | paid
fur the tombstun.'
''An' who knows but the poor creetur
ct wuz made for gets the rood ont by
comm here o nights an settin' omit
replied Melissa, in a you don't beat
he tone"
Let i'm come ef cts any satisfaction
tn im' said Josiah fcelingly, give.
i'm "A chance,tu cool off. an' ef his wife.
"eth i'm mebbe twill save i'm from
gettin' stun deaf and JOSIAH tumblcd
out Of the door in a hurry as Melissa
reached for the broomstick. and the
ancient sinner Rugged himself outside
at the thought that for once he had had
the last word, a monopoly which Ne.
LISA insisted on As her sole right.
The beatenest man. said Melissa.
pursuing the subject for the benefit Of
the little dressmaker who was doing
over her best alpaca, as the sound Of
her husbands footsteps died away.
ut o no use warnin' him, for he can
no more keep away from an auction
than an Irishman kin keep out of a
fight"
"Cm-m," said little Miss Irons in =
non-committal manner; she wa a wise
woman, in her day and generation. and
knew better than TO NEEDLE with family
jars How did You want these sleeve.
finished at the wrist, Mrs. Bartlett9"
"Well, | was calkerlatin tn hey cuff.
OF the %yelyit," said Melissa. with lively
interest, Il allowed as ther'd be enough
fur cuffs an collar, en- tibet remind.
me, She exclaimed, going back to the
unfinished subject, ''Josier did max,
one good bargin ct en- auction .~ey'rjll
years ago; he bid off a real silk yelyi,
cape fur a dollar'n a hef, an | mad,
me a bunnit an trimmed up nv old
silk so'st it looked cz nice ez new
Have you forgotten that o~yercoat
mother" said Jennie, a tall, BLACK.
eyed lassic, her fathers idol by til,
way, that pa bid off for two dollar.
and sold for five before he left tn,
auction room?'
'No, child" replied Melissa. quit,
Modified, ''Ill edinit yer pa hez mad,
some good bargains, but they're Xix,
some other things, few an far be
twi1t."
Jennie was a shrewd young womal
and deyotedly attached to her father
apdin view Of the fact that his retur,
home might not be altogether pleasan
u, as upon numerous other occasions
he came loaded with articles of doub,
full utility, she flew about with nor
than her usual CELEBRITY, and 50 life
the burden Of her mothers work tina
she was in an unusually rested and am
able frame of mind when evening a,
preached. and finally finished her 200
work by getting up her mothers f,
vorite dishes for tea, which was daintl
spread in the cheerful kitchen whe
Josiah arrived home from, alas fc
mans inherent depravity! the 20
Hand" sale.
In every express Office there is a
accumulation of articles, mis-directe,
uncallcd for and rejected, which on b,
ing kept a certain time, are c%olleetc
together at a central point, and sold
auction; nearly every thing imagin,
BILE Is found there. and AS the most
the articles are done up in package
there arc funny revelations when the,
are undone.
''Now. MISSY, Of We won't scol
I'll show you my purchases" said j
siah. as his wife swallowed the la
m~outhful of her favorite cream cake.
II knew you'd go to tibet salc!' sa
Melissa, r~esignedly. The dclicio
supper had produced the desired effe,
''Wall. yes; neighbor Stebbins W
goin'. an he wuz tibet sot OF my goi
tew tibet ! cuddent refuse" repli
Josiah, rpclogetically, and going
the door he brought in several bu
dies. aud lastly u large box from t
piazza.
The land o. massyl what hey y
rot nowf" calculated Melissa. ISL
mors tombstuns7"
''Sutsy nigh heavy enough" o.