Fisherman & farmer. [volume] (Edenton, N.C.) 1887-19??, 1888-02-10
ARMSTRONG'S LESSON.

O1Qel udyS Oh SOlQ, VI Tic SOIucH udNS
of old, as you please-in certain miners
camp on Yuba River there lived queer
geniOus named Armstrong. He was an
honest miner, not differing materially
from his fellows, excepting that he had
a curious habit Of talking to himself.
From the simple reason that he departed
from the common custom in this one par
ticular he was of course voted crazy by
the other miners. To call all persons
"crazy'' who do not follow the customs
of the ma jority is constant habit with
men. But day after day Armstrong
worked away with his p ok and shovel,
caring nothing for the remarks of his
ncighbors, and seeming to wish for no
partner in his tolls or rest save the in
visible parsonage whom he always adj
dressed in the second person singular,
and with whom he was almost in close
and earnest conversation The drift of
his talk while at work would be as fol-
lows:
sRather tough work, Armstrong-rich
dirt, though-grub 81 a pound-no
time to waste-pitch in, sir-hanged if
/ don't wish was In the States. This
INNINGS mighty hard work. Nonsense,
Armstrong; what fool you are to be
talking that way, with three ounces a
day right under your feet, and nothing
to do but just to dig it out"
His conversation would be duly pune
tuated with strokes of the pick and lifts
of the loaded shovel. And so the days
would pass along. and Armstrong worked
and slept and talked with his invisible
partner. Well, it happened in due course
of time that the class of human vampires
commonly called gamblers made their
appearance at the camp where Armstrong
had been working. AS he was not above
following the example of his fellows, he
paid the newcomers visit. 1t is the same
old story. After watching the game
awhile he concluded it was the simplest
thing in the world. So he tried his luck
and won-$100! Now, any new eX-
perience would set Armstrong to think
ing and talking to himself worse than
ever. 1t was so this time. ''Now, Arm
strong" he said, as he hesitated about
going to work the next morning, that
is the easiest 500 you ever made in your
life. WHAT'S the use of your going into
a hole in the ground to dig for three
ounces day? The fact is, Armstrong,
you are sharp. You are not made for this
kino OF work. Suppose you just throw
away your pick and shovel, leave the
mines, buy suit of store clothes, dress
up like born gentleman, and go at some
business that suits your talent"
Armstrong was not long in putting
these thoughts and sayings into action.
He left the diggings and invested in fine
clothes. He looked like another man,
but he was still the same Armstrong,
nevertheless. He was not long in finding
an opportunity to try new profession.
Walking forth in his fresh outfit he had
just concluded long talk with himself
about his bright prospects when he
halted in front of large tent with sign
over it: Miners Rest" Armstrong went
in. 1t did not seem to him that he re-
manned very long, but it was long enough
to work a wonderful revolution in his
feelings. When he came out he was a
changed man-that is to say, he was a
Echangeless" man. He was thunder
struck, amazed, bewildered He had lost
his money, lost his new prospect, lost his
elf-conceit-lOst everything but his new
clothes and habit of talking to himself.
1t is useless to say that he was mad.
Armstrong was very mad. But there was
no one 20 be mad at but Armstrong him
self, so self number two was in for a rough
lecture.
''Now, Armstrong, you are a nice
specimen-you fOol-you bilk--you dead
DeaI-yOu I'M w ell, l. neeO not re-
peat all the hard things he said. Like
King Richard he ''found within himself
no pity for himself"
But mere words were not sufficien t.
1t was a time for action. But Armstrong
never once thought of drowning, shoot
ing, hanging or any other form of suicide.
He was altogether too original, as well
as too sensible for that. Yet he was re-
solved on something real and practical in
the way of reformatory punishment. He
felt the need of self-imposed decree of
bankruptcy that should render the failure
IS complete as possible, and prevent a
similar course in the future.
So the broken firm Of Armstrong &
Self went forth in meditation long and
deep. Some of his thoughts were almost
too deep for utterance. But finally he
stood by the dusty road along which the
great freighting wagons were hauling
supplies TO the mining camp up the Sacra
mento. One of these wagons, drawn by
six yoke of oxen, was just passing.
Snap, snap, snap, in slow irregular success
sion, came the keen, sting reports of the
long Missouri OK whip. ''G'lang g'lang!
wo-haw'' shouted the tall, dust-be-
grimed driver as he swung his whip and
cast sidelong glance at the broken firm,
wondering what all them store clothes
was a dom thar" Now, when Arm
strong saw the long column of white
duSt riSin0 bebiDd that WAGON he uaS