Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-12-23
TAyORITE SEAT.

lANOtliE SEAL
Laidlaw's favorite seat is in corner
of the Republican cloak-room. He sits
there surrounded 10y Charles s. Baker,
John kcan, Jr, James ). Belden, Ste
phen r. Hopkins. and others. All smoke
/ Relden's ciQnrs and arc good listeners.
Laidlaw frequently trenches on the do
main OF the negro minstrel. The other
day bis listeners were III quandary lie
bad put this question: "Nhy is Grover
like a map.e.trcc
tyen keau gave it up.
Because lao leaves in the spring, ="
YVES the reply.
George Thatcher would say that this
conundrum is based upon the survival Of
the fttcst, Baker remarked. but certain
it is Tat Lnidlaw claims TO have been
the first 20 apply it to the President.
Two weeks ago bushy-heaied William
T. Mason came back from Chicago. A
Democratic member met him in the
Speakers lobby. "Wcll, Billy" said
he, "vouve had an easy time III Con-
Qress under Democratic Administra-
non. When Harrison's inaugurated,
AMI Won have 10 tIo. around tie depart
mcpts looking for patronage under the
ciyilserVlcc law, II won't be so easy.
1--WE had q iorctaste OF what was
comino. Mason replied twenty seven
men after one post-oilice I'm like the
son whose father died and left him all
the property, disinheriting the rest Of
the family. The lawyers broke in and
bo3an to eat up the estate. After two
wears or more a friend asked the son
when the litigation would end. ]
don't know. he replied. 1t Las given
me world OF trouble. aud, between you
and NE. John. ] sometimes almost wish
that the old man hadn't NV died.
HORIZONTAL VOTING.
Timothy T.. Tarsney is o Democratic
congressman Knocked ont at the late
election. tie represents Il salt and lum-
Der district in Michigan. Both articles
were scheduled on the free-lst in the
Mills hill. When asked he cause Of his
defeat Timothy replied "lt was the
tariff My constituents applied Bill
Morrison principles TO me. -Four years
ago WAS elected 10y l,G0D majority. |
came down here and voted for the Nor
rison horizontal redu ton tariff bill and
went back home. They applied the hor-
izontal reduction system TO me. Two
wears ago they returned me with 800
majority. | came down here and voted
for the Mills bill. This year my con
stItuents landed me on the free-iist. "
TAXING THE UNDERSTANDING.
Robert !. Vance is a planet in the
armament Of congressional humor He
brings from New hrltain, Conn, a fund
OF good election stories. The best is an
account OF a conversation which he says
he overheard between two Irishmen.
They were discussing the merits of the
Mills bill.
Fat" said one of them, "sure 1
can't Oondersthand fwhat they name by
raw msterial. so can't"
"Surs that's aisy enough. Jenny. so
it is, p" Tat Ieplieo. "Doye moind the
spads beyaut - rotating to a basket OF
potatoes near the door OF grocery.
y do. then, Was the answer.
"Whin you Gig them from the ground,
sure they're raw material but whin you
boil thin wild their shkins on, sure
they re nlanuiactered articles"
The answer upset Jimmy. he pulled
his pipe in silence for full minute.
"Sarc. then. ishat is il the Mills bill
does be taxin' " lac asked
" 1t does be taxin' coal and sugar and
all the Other luxuries OF life, " Pat re-
sponded :" but sure | think it taxes the
oonderstauding the most, so il does.
Ashbel L. Fitch is another of the
planets. He returned from New York
city with q Imaginable election story at the
expense Of Barney Martin, II Iammany
lieuteIant. Barney organized a negro
Democratic club in hisassembly district.
IL was 10 parade when the President
visited the city. When the darkies were
In line shouldering their torches one OF