Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1888-02-22

MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.


bank cashier?" He--"Yes." She-aMy
eldest brother is in Montreal, too. Per-
haps they're acquainted. d.'--Judge.
GIRL violinists are becoming numerous.
Girls are always after heaux of one sort or
another-at least in leap year.-LoweH
Courier.
The cold snap is accounted for. A
quicksilver trust has been formed, and of
course mercury went Pittsburg Chr0n-
icIe.
A CORRESPONDENT inquiries il the rea-
son that so many corporations are on their
uppers nowadays is because they have no
soles.--Pack.
THE hustle must not and will not 90,
though it is entirely willing to be SO far
eclipsed as to take back seat-Ne,r Or
leans Picdyune.
THE Duke Of Newcastle is now in New
York. If he had only brought his Goals
with him he would have been doublv well
come. e.--BostOn Post.
The Kentucky pair of shoes that are
eighteen inches long excites no comment
whatever from the Chicago papers. s.--Louis-
cilie COurier-.journdt.
Is there political intimidation in Ohio?
The Gazette has telegram from that state
headed Licking County Prohibitionists.
-Pittsburg Chronicle.
WHAT will we do if we have a coal fam
ine?" Il don't know. Perhaps we will
have to take to the turf. ."--BOst0n iSatur-
day Erening Gazette.
He is a model husband who will pretend
to praise his wife's ability as cook and
then use her doughnuts as sinkers for his
fishing lines.-FaH Riuer Adrdnce.
Now, my dear, said the teacher, what
is memory" The little girl answered,
after a moments reflection 1T is the
thing you forget with. '--Erchange.
We are informed that Russia will not
take the initiative. 1t is certainly reas-
suring to know that there is something
that Russia doesn't want.
TOO much absorbed in his business"
was the comment of newspaper on the
death Of brewer who was found drowned
in a tank of his own beer.
SOME people are passionately fond of
doughnuts. Others never eat any part Of
the doughnut except the hole. These peo-
pie seldom have dyspepsia.
IT is said that jay Gould enjoyed the
novel sensation of short balloon trip in
Paris. He's got the earth, and he probably
went up to take a look at the sky.
DO not laugh at the antics of your cat,
said Michael de Montaigne, the great philo-
sophie essayist; for aught you can tell, he
may be laughing at you.
IT is singular fact that when two
young men meet they address each other,
How are you. old mani" and that when
two old fellows NEE. they say, My boy"
You can live within your income il You
try" says the wise man. Yes, but how to
live without an income is the puzzle that
bothers great many good men just Iow.
MISS GOTHAM What an elegant menu
they had," Miss Chicago-"Did they?
Well, now, didn't notice it. You see
was so busy sizing up the bill Of fare. -
life.
We are informed that Russia will not
take the initiative 1t is certainly reassur-
ing to know that there is something that
Russia does not want. Boston Transcript.
THE forty years old man who will delib-
erately go down a toboggan slide the
second time has either led very righteous
SOME people are so sanguine in this
world that they think they can plant
handful of seed in "a snowdrift and gather
a carload Of strawberries the day after the
first thaw.
DISCRETION is defined as that part Of
valor which enables one to keep safe dis
tance between ones self and trouble. Police
men manifest its possession in most un-
usual degree.
A SPORTSMAN is man who spends all
day away from his business, % for shot
and powder and comes home Al night tired,