davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Custer chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, Black Hills, D.T. [S.D.]) 1880-1890, 1888-10-13

uf The universe ia battle array could not
stop his black chariot IA second, or diyerGe
it an incn, the driver OF that cAar!ot
says; ''Ca.l upon mo in The days 81
trouble Ind | will deliver thee; while
th,y are yet speaking ! will hear Two
wheeled chariot. one wheel justice aud
NE other wheel mercy. Aye, they are
swift wheels. \ cloud, whether It be
longs to the cirrhus, the clouds that ttoatthe
highest; or belongs to the stratus, the cen
ira! ranges; or 10 the CulroiLs
the lowest ranges, Seems to move
slowly along the SKY II il moves
AT all. Blu, MANY Of the clouds go
at a speed that would seem lctharge.icn a
yestibulc limited lightning express train,
so swift is the chariot OF our God yea,
sWifter than tie Storm, sOifter that the
light. Yet a child ten years old has been
known to reach up, and with the HAND OF
prayer take the Courser Of that chariot by
the bit and slow il UP. or stop II. or turn
1t aside. or turn IL hack, The hey sam.
uel stopped it. Elijah storpedit. heze.
hiah stopped il. Daniel stopped IT,
Joshua stopped il. Esther stopped j..
Ruth stopped it. Hannah stopped il.
Mary stopped it. My father stopped L..
My mothcr stopped il. Ny sister stonpcd
il. We have in our Sabbath schools chill
dren who again and again and again
have st0ppeait ii.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-01-22
LITTLE FORTUNES SMELLS.
Colonies of Maine Fishermen Fishing
Through the Ice Night nnd bay.

kl4HNA'tph r''tA At'-tsi
Not the least important OF the winter
industries of Bath is the business OF
catching smelts. Every man with a
trade, temporarily unemployed. rigs out
three or four smelt lines, and crosses the
river in quest of the mighty dollar
through the shining little six-inch smelt.
Thus it is that to-day not less than 80
men and boys, occupying not more
than two acres of ice in Back river
are making money. One little fellow,
about thirteen or fourteen years of age,
has, for the past week, realized - per
day; but there are men on the ice who
fished before he was born who ara not
doing so well. The men enter INTO
partnership and construct little cabin
over their hole in the ice. The cabins
DEFY description. A stout frame is made
ana this is covered with anything OBJ
tainable, no matter what it Is, provided
it will keep out the cold.
There are about seventy-fve OF these
cabins, and each has a crew of two men,
one of whom fishes all day while the
other fishes all night Beside these
there are mauy who fish unprotected by
any shelter, and frozen fingers, &c,
often result. The catch this season has
been very fair. Good fishermen have
thus far averaged about fifty pounds per
day.
What becomes Of them ? Well, that
depends largely upon the condition Of
the catchers finances. If he can wait a
few DAYS for his money, he will send
them to Boston or New York and get 10
or 10 cents a pound, but If he Is IN need
of ready money, then there is no other
resort than to sell them to the local
markets at 1 or D cents per pound, or
to spectators on the ice at 3
cents per pound. These spectators are
rather shrewd fellows. They enter the
settlement with baskets and scales, buy
the fish on tine spot at three cents, and
send them to Boston and receive ten for
them. There are three or four OF these
fellows, and as one OF them told me that
he sent away over six hundred pounds
every day last week, 1t can easily be
seen that be can afford to take long
vacation next simmer.
But some OF the fishermen are sharp,
too, and send their fish away on the CO.
operative plan, aud 50 make a good
thing. But they fear lest the markets
should be flooded, and so keep the desti-
nation of the fish as quiet as possible. [
heard one man growing away at great
rate Tuesday morning. He said " I'm
not going to sell my fish at three cents a
pound to these men and let them triple
their money. Ill throw them overheard
first" "Why don't you send them
away yourself?" | asked. That's 1t ;
it's because don't know where to send
them" 1he season will continue Tor
about six weeks longer. At present
many of the men are making rom - to
g per day and are, consequently, well
satisfied with their lot.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-01-22
Saved ny Her BGstie.
[Hayward's Journal

may diA , ugAi lAehl
We don't believe history has chroni-
cled a more singular escape from death
than occurred in Redwood canyon last
week. The male sex, who are an unfeel-
ing lot taken altogether, have severely
criticised bustles, which are most I'M
portant part OF the female wardrobe,
but after reading this thrilling episode
they should forever hold their peace.
A handsome young lady OF sweet seven
teen arrived from Arizona a couple OF
weeks ago and spent q very pleasant visit
with friends in the above canyon.
One evening when the head Of
the family was away the milking
naturally fell on the female portion
Of the household. The Arizona fair
one at once offered to do her share, bat
the aunt protested. The protest was of
no avail, however, and shortly afterward
she started for the corral, pail in hand, a
typical Maud Muller. The young lady
was just In the act of milking when a
farocious bull spied her, and at once
started on the war-path. II was crit
cal position, and as the bull came charg-
ing at her with lowered horns, with blood
in his eye, the young lady quistly drop
ped on the ground face downward,
and lay as still as death. This ma
novre was something new for the
bull. and he was moment non
plussed. but soon recovered from his sur
prise and made for the PROSTATE maiden,
and had it not been for that hustle the
young lady never would have lived TO tell
this exciting experience. The bull gored
that tenderly framed air-castle called a
hustle until 1t gave way and he retired
with the trophy. The aunt saw the
charge and was about to run in to assist
when the brave girl called TO keep back
or both would be killed. AS it turned
out. the bull, after discovering the bus
tie, concluded that he had made slight
mistake, aud retired from the battle.
Had the Young lady started to run the
bull would very likely have soon over
taken and killed her.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-01-22
Rreechcs OF Promise.

Twenty eight female persons in this
great and grand republic, according to
the most reliable statistics, wear trousers,
and would gladly vote for Belva Lock
wood if they only could. Twenty-eight
females in pantaloons. OF the twenty
eight breeched females eleven "sus-
pend from the shoulders, somewhat after
the despised manner OF the monster man /;
nine "button on" to n waist of ample
dimensions and some fearful and
wonderful material, and eight hold up
their bifurcated garmenture with puck
ering string at the waist, modification
OF the strap Of the section hand. 1t is a
matter Tor infinite rejoicing that in a
country of over 90, 900, 900 OF human be-
ings only tventy-eight female persons
wear "pants." But il the two dozen
and four should get together and have a
Lockwood torchlieht procession-great
candle-moulds would not the terrified
moon hustle down into the Valley of
Aialon on the sun ?
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-01-22
way from the back OF my neck to my
heels in one comprehensive glance.
On a Missouri Prairie.

The forests OF Kansas do not impress
the beholder as do these magnificent
plains OF Missouri. over which we are
whirling as these lines are penned. There
is nothing vast, nothing swe-iuspiring
about Kansas tree. Ii does It's best, |
suppose, but il runs so much 10 warps,
and knots, and corns, and cramps. and
bunions, and warts, and excre.cences.
and crooks, and twists, and lunches that
il can't get very high. II wastes its
energies in crookedness. But maybe 1t
catches that from the Indian agents.
Anyhow, danger board ought to be put
up near a Kansas forest. lest some care
less man might step on it in the dark.
A moment the train Stacks mp. and
down the long sweep of this vast Mis-
souri prairie comes the sturdy settler.
There is no snow, but he drives a sleigh.
The sleigh weighs somewhat less than a
ton and Is drawn by an only OK. and ne
an orphan. Judge that be isan orphan
from the tender, reproschful expression
that films in his dim and glazing eye
every time the sturdy settler tetches him
a whack with the piece of rail he uses
for "gad." If the rail doesn't break
aud the OK doesn't die. the sturdy settler
will get there. In fact, l think he IS
nearly there now.
This is great big country. 1t makes
you tired to try to see the nearest edge
OF it. The longer you look the farther
away 1t seems, and the further into this
country you go the wider it grows
Bless your soul there's room out here
for the man who wants the earth. he
could come out here and have it and
then there would be plenty left for the
rest of u.s.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-01-22
uaeanlay's Memory.
[pollocKis RomlnI.cences.l


had a holiday task to do of making
Latin Hexameters and pentameters from
BANDS book, provided for the purpose.
Dundas and Macaulay then on the
northern circuit we're 80 kind rs some
times to help me, and Dundas used to
tease me by giving me as "sense for
pentsmeter "the patient bear fears not
winters cold" which my small powers
OF verse-makIng did not enable me to
turn into Latin, and somehow it got to
be a sort OF established little Joke
against me that | could not
do it. Twenty years passed, and
when paying visits in Scotland after my
marriage we were at Lord Rutherford 5
beautiful place of Lsuriston near Edin-
burgh. We arrived in the late afternoon,
and we're told that Macaulsy, then mem
Der for Edinburgh, was staying in the
house. Macaulsy came into the room,
took place left vacant for him opposite
TO myself, and at once, without any pre-
liminary greeting or other sign Of recog-
milton, said TO me across the table
swell. did YOU ever make out that pen
tameter for 'the patient bear fears not
winters cold?'"
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-01-22
A Muthiu koiree-SpeaktnE Under
DldicuitteS.

About the year 1899 temperance soci-
cites we're in their infancy IN the rural
districts. BY that time Grief had felt the
mise of abstinence, aud lectures and
sources were the Injuries OF the humber
classes. The principal local speakers
were the late Messrs. j. Martin and W.
Ramsay. These two worthy men did
tbeir utmost 10 stem the flood OF inebri
etv Statistics aud literature relating 10
,be new cause were scarce, and cOnse-
ouently "A monotony OF phrases and Illus
trstions could not be avoided. All the
Scripture passages that could he turned
~ bear on the subject were 10 short
time IN the mouths OF the new proseIytes.
By-and bye u prominent oiiice-bearer or
two of the society veutured to address an
audience, and not the least successful OF
these was Mr.. Gonld, painter. These
vonnp birds soon mastered the whole
tAmperance vocabulary, and RS their
nr,.,tice increased their boldness III
creasea. and an occasional flight to
neiol,borino village was attempted. II
more than one temperance advocate WAS
Ia speak at a meeting the hrst TO
do so had the advantage oil all the rest,
and the longer he spoke the lesser grew
the store on which those who followed
conlJ draw. In such cases many 60
bves were offered for speeches, such as
.sAt this late hour OF the night 1t would
he a waste of time to detain YOU" etc;
or "After the eloquent and telling adj,
dresses of previous speakers, 1t would
be useless to dilate further on the abuses
Of the spirit traffic at this time, but |
hone soon 10 have another opportunity
Of exnosipe the insidions workings OF
tbe sanl-and- body destroying drinking
customs Of the land; a.,
AZ that time Muthill. village three
miles south OF Grief, bestirred itself
and formed temperance society, ana ~
Han.eI Monday made arrangements Tor
a Grand temperance soiree at their Ma
snos, Hall The committee beng new
b. such undertakings, were determined
80 DIV. a full snrfeit, and accord
;oo,y make appointments with a
dayyn or 30 OF speakers--a nuin-
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-01-22
BURDETTEpS FUN.
ODDS AND ENDS HuHoRoUsLY TREATED
BY THE FUNNY NAN.
A Vanishing Idsal-Breeches OF Promise
Meeting Of the Planets-rwo ways
to Make Kissss-Ths Song OF
the Fool, Etc.
[For the Dlspatch-Copyrighted, isSSl
Nnnfehfun gaeat

hnntshtng sdeaL
Man never attains his ideal. He comes
nearest it the day he leaves school all
that year he hovers around il in pleasant
proximity. Sometimes | think he quite
attains il on commencement day. But
year away from school, he and his ideal
part company. He sees it drifting
farther away from his eager hands. L
have, in my own brilliant and aggressive
career, pursued several fleeing and more
or less perfect ideals. From where now
stand, al the distance pole, can see the
majority OF them scooting under the wire,
and feel that | am shut out. One, l can
see, is yet in nearer sight, and | am very
loath to see it get entirely away from
me. have my ideal of physical per-
lection in the aged. This is the manner
OF old man l want to be. / am not
tall man now. / do not really have to
stand up to look over the back OF car
seat | stand mp merely because l can
see farther. But as grow old | want
10 fat up | want 10 develop capacious
bay-window, so that when my summer
vest is hanging on the line 1t will look
like a schooner coming down ewing and
wing" Then | can wear my watch in
my fob, with n great big seal dangling
from it like a bell-clapper. l want to
be short in the breath and wheeze when
| climb upstairs, and puff and pant
when / walk uphill, and have to
take two steps TO cross the gutter. And L
would wear a claw hammer coat, with
wide lapels, all the time, and carry my
handkerchief in my hat / would like
my hair to turn snow-white or else fall
Off am not very particular which. |
would like my moustache to bleach out
until it looked like a streak OF Hour
across my lip. believe this is all. l
think that IS a photograph OF the kind
of an old man | would like to be. This
is my ideal old man. Cane and wheezy
laugh, of course.
And | am Just as confident as | am
that will die rich that as | grow old |
will shrivel mp and dry ont until | look
like o shoestring with clothes on.
Twas ever thus from childhood's hours,
I've seen my fondest hopes decay:
I never tried to save an hour but what I
wasted half a day. L never took girl
to church. the longest way back home
to plan, but that she left me in the
lnrch and walked back with another
man. never had a fond gazelle to glad
me with its dark-blue eye; | had goat
which knocked mo out-my life is
marred with butts, said I. The two eye
Is which constitute the rhyme in this
closing stanza, You will observe, are like
Ben Butler's-they are not mates they
are Just similar enough to spoil the
rhyme and diverse enough to mar their
harmony.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-01-22
AsIeepIha.Knows a waking.

A commercial traveller writes to a New
York paper about a strange, unconquera-
BILE drOwsiness that comes over him when
he gets on the train, and tells wonderful
stories about it how in one instance he
got on the train to go thirty-two miles,
fell sound asleep in five minutes, and
awoke next morning one hundred and
ninety-four miles beyond his destination.
Now, have no desire to cast any shadow
of doubt upon the brothers narrative.
| know that men do grow very drowsy
on the cars, and that a passenger
might sleep one hundred and ninety
four miles beyond his destination. l
know that he might But also, know
that he docSnI Because, while the
passenger might be very drowsy the
conductor isn't Oh. no He is pain
fully wide-awake Iou try him once.
Just you buy ticket to Peeksllll and
then try to sleep through to Albany, and
lust observe how awfully, how adaman-
tically hard is the platform at Pough-
keepsie when YOU laud down on 1t. An,
no, brother even the sleepiest men do
not sleep one hundred and ninety-iour
miles beyond the limits OF their ticket.
They are willing to; they try TO some
times but they don't do it, all the same.
On, no have been there, my brother !!
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-01-22
a General Average,

Gone hundred doses for dollar" is
the way patent medicine headsits "sd. "
Man takes dollars worth. Then the
undertaken comes along, and 1t costs
the man one hundred dollars for a dose.
Thus we see all things come around even
in this old world after all. When
wheat is cheap flour is high, and
when You can buy whole Stalled OK
for four cents pound beefsteak keeps
up to nineteen cents, with close flavor
OF the horns at that. When the tele-
phone company chops two holes through
the roof of your house for no
thing it makes up forit by charging you
fifty cents for telling the coal man to
bring you twelve tons OF hard coal when
you only tried to order three quarts of
ice-cream from the confectioners. But
it's all right. l don't complain. At
least is is, " and whatever is, is right.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-01-22

Der of Grief orntors, including Mr..
Gould, being on the list. A host OF local
vocal talent was secured, and the then
instrumental band was engaged to en-
liven the proceedings aud to fill up any
interstices that might occur When the
hour OF meeting arrived and the per-
formers gathered it was found that they
alone would nearly Gil the hall, TO
which they could scarcely get en-
trance owing to the large audience
who were packed in every corner. But
what Of the programme of the perform
ance Ave, that was the rub After
serious deiberation II was seen that were
each one on the programme to get full
swing the meeting wonld be continued
well into the next morning, and it was
resolved to allow each speech or per-
Torrance only five minutes at most-the
only exception being Mr.. Gould, who,
being an able speaker from a distance,
was 10 be allowed ten minutes.
The chairman, on taking his place,
put his watch before him, and set the
entertainment agoing. Speeches, songs,
buns, sweeties, and chOruses followed
each other in quick succession, and
drums and trumpets ratified in their
rear. This sort OF thing continued for
three hours, during which the newly
fedged orators hariied the temperance
literary nest of all its stock terms,
anecdotes, and applications, and now
came Mr.. Gould's turn to display his tai
ents The chairman, on Announcing
him, called attention TO his fame as
shining light in the temperance iirma-
ment and craved a patient hearing. As
MIR. Gonld rose he trembled, for his in
tended address bad been perfectly
honey -combed-iterated and reiterated
by previous speakers. He must,
however, say something, but what
WAS he TO say ? His speeches had
been conned like the mulbpica-
tion-table. and he could not deyiate.
Amid profound silence he opened bis
lips and said: "Mf. Chairman, Ladies,
and Gentlemen Tgreat cheeungl, be
tween bonnie lassies and bonnie sangs L
have forgotten my speech [more APP
pausel but III do the best | can, and,
as the saying is, The best that
is can do me mair.'" This was re-
ceived with great outburst of APP
plause, mingled with taps on the
bass drum. When order was restored
he felt an inclination to faint or sink
through a trap-door. Feeling perfectly
bewildered and uncertain what to do, he
raised his right hand and exclaimed,
1.-The lion. the tiger, and the whale.
which was instantly followed by a ire
mendous roar Of laughter and cries OF
Again again !" But no he sunk on
his sat. and cold sweat oozed ont of
his exhausted frame He felt that his
borrowed plumes were plucked, and he
,,or-,,. cOov.l orniy
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-01-22
Meetinr offhc PIanefs.

Ella Wheeler, describing the meeting
Of two fond young lovers. sings in her
own sweet, Wild way. "Loye, when we
met twas like two planets meeting [
never saw two planets meet, and always
had an impression that the ceremony of
introduction would be marred by the
presence Of large acreage of cold
and formal chaos. But if they
only smile in rapturous, overtime
garden wall sort OF way, and look ner-
yously up and down the street, and then
60 gigglng oil to the chop-hOuse and
wrestle with steak, why, | believe |
don't care to see a whole reception OF
planets. 1t would be ten times more ex-
citing to watch a maA turn round a
crowded corner with long ladder on his
shoulder and meet another man.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-01-22
Two waysIo wake Kisses.

Miss Parloa, the cooking expert, says
she makes kisses by beating the whites
of six eggs with Dover beater and add
ing two cups OF mixed sugar. which She
stirs in very carefully" Well, she GER
tainly makes them sweet enough, which
shows that she understands something
about the business; but if you haven't
plenty OF time on hand, young man, and
don't want to go through all that APP
parently needless red tape and en-
cnmlocution when you so into
the business of manufacturing kisses,
Emma Abbott will be much
more satisfactory partner than Miss
Parloa. To make good kisses, a girl
need not be AN authority on Bavarian
cream and escalloped oysters, but when
she stands on the lower cross-piece her
face ought 10 come at least eight inches
above the top OF the gate, with the moon.
light on her cheek and the shadow on the
other then You know just where to aim,
my son. And if you have any doubts
about it, send for your old father. You
needn't ring just rattle stick on the
palinCs. and III come down.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-01-22
The song OF tue Fool.

Within my sanctum snug sit,
And watch the world 20 round and round;
Ny Ink IA dry. my pen Is split:
NV paste and scissors can't be found.
All Joy for me. my work Is dropped.
For who can work without his toOlss
True, as you say, my pay is stopped,
But money Is not good for fools.
So foolish here sit and dream
Witrin my -nnctlm's scanty bound;
touch no pen 10 thought or theme.
But watch the world 30 round and round.
With sweat ani struggle. toll and pain,
From dawn Of Jay "a set OF sun,
With lust o. power ana greed Of gain.
With battles lost and victories won,
With hate and fear and bitter strife,
With ucacherOu- low and angry wound,
While l. the fool, IN happier life,
just watch the world 20 round aud round.
ROBERT j. BURDgrTE.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-01-22
Censorship i'm italy.
Saturday Reyiew.l

Nine. Ristori gives some amusing
"reminiscences of the Censorship in the
italy of her youth, where the use Of the
words God" and "angel, and
.'devil" WAS absolutely forbidden /;
where such proper names as nus, In
nocent, Urban, and Leo were never
heard upon the stage; where once, for
the suspicious expression "beau ciel
d'Italie," an official of genius substituted
the august and touching phrase =" beau
ciel Lombard-Venitien," aud where
Norma's two sons were transformed by
stroke of the pen into Norma's little
brothers.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1888-01-22
Whnt This Miuter Lacks.

1t seems to me this winter is rather
more hitherto and souliulIy beyond than
was its predecessor OF one bright year
agone. 1t lacks snow. There is ileshy
bitterness about the snow that We are
getting this winter that reminds you OF
the mud on an Iowa farm during the
balmy days of April, when the whole
prairie land is a vast mortar-bed. kude
and loud sounding boys cannot mould
the snow OF this winter into balls
and fire them at ones willowy
form, but man can slip up
and fall down in IL, and there is the last
end of that man worse than all other
ends. Woe is me, Albania or words 10
that effect; for this earthly dross that is
palmed off upon us for snow this year
seems to cling and dry slowly, like shoe-
makers wax. / have just been there
myself, and it has taken me thirty-eight
miles TO dry standing before the stove in
a crowded car and trying 10 twist my
head over my shoulder to look all the