The Arkansaw traveler., 1888-07-07
AN ECONOMIST.

A traveller in Kentucky who had stopped and begun conversation with a squint-eyed olG fellow who was cut ting briars and sassafras sprouts out of the fence- pointed to house some distance away and asked:
 "Who lives over there?"
 "The Widder Bradley" the farmer replied, "an' do reckon that she's a leetle the peartest woman in the neighborhood. She fust married Pete Bradshaw. Pete he died and the wid- der was putty much grief struck. She had little money and she hired a stone-cutter to chisel out monument for Pete, agreein' to furnish the rock herself. The cutter went to work, but as he want in very big hurry, the widder she tuck a-likin' to feller named Sandy Smith an married him. Then she told the cutter to jest chip along at his lezur' an he done so. It want long alter this till Sandy got leetle full, fell often the foot-log into the bayou and was drownded. The widder had him drug out an buried beside Pete an then went to the cut ter an told him to put one more name on the monument. She moped around fur some little time an didn't pear to enjoy her vidults very much, but atterw'ile thar come along 8 feller named Nose Bradley. Nose he made a dead set at the widder and she tuck him, she did. About month alter this, Nose he run afoul uv a pizen sort uv irresponsible feller an was laid out. The widder was nightly crushed, bein' uv a powerful tender natur' but urged on by her strong business instincts she got on mule, rode over to the stone-cutter's house an calling the feller out to the fence axed him ef that ar monument was done.
 "'Not quite,' the feller flowed, ez he breshed some limestone dust outen his whiskers.
 "'Wall,' says she, 'have you got room on the readin' side uv it fur CT nuther name?'
 "I reckin I ken 'comerdate you, madam,' said he.
 "sWall, then,' she lowed, jest put Nose Bradley on thar in ez good shape ez you ken.'
 "He done it, an the widder she put up the monument over all three of the fellers an had these here words cut on one side. Here lies the bodies uv my three tender an lovin' husbands Now, sir," the farmer added, as he struck at lizard with his briar- hook, "do you know whut sort uv break Pm goin' to maker"
 "Can't say that I do," the traveller replied.
 "Ill tell you. Pm goin' to marry that widder."
 "She must be very attractive"
 "No, she ain't, nuther."
 Has money, suppose"
 "No."
 "Then why do you wish to marry herr"
 "On account of her political econ- omy. You see, her husbands wuz mixed up more or less in politics, an & woman that makes one monument do fur three politicians is the female critter that Pm alter. reckon I love economy better'n any man in the world. Some folks likes music, an' some air fond uv barbecued shoat :; some like flicker, am some like . good hoss, but jest give me economy, ef you please. EfPd got all the economy I wanted, would have been wuth suthin' to day. I married the most 'stravagant woman I ever seen. Do you know what that woman would do? I've know'd her to buy five yards and am ha'f uv calico to make dress outen, when she oughter know'd that five yards was enough. Am eat /! wy, have know'd her to set at the table am eat fur fifteen minutes at stretch. Yas, am she got so tony toward the last that she wanted sugar. in her