Reporter and farmer. [volume] (Webster, Day County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1946, 1888-05-10
Anew smiles.

-.
nwhat made leftover of Pisa leans
s.Rscause of the famine in the LAND,
said i how who got the tower contus-
ed with Joseph's brethren.-Teachef'
Lille Insurance Agent-"Madam. our
comnany has never failed to pay
single claim. and when you consider
tbst ona.sixth ofour holders die every
vaar vou-'Madam-"S many oiel
Really / can't think of taking poh'
CIV: don't think it would be SAFE.
Harper's Bazaar.
Kosciusko Murphy, who is a BOOK
keeper in a grocery store, met ir'ehu
who clerks in a cigar store on Austin
avenue. and asked him for cigar.
CANT got any," said his friend.
aAin,t GOT, any" said kosclusko.
"Wby. when,I used to work IN a ciga.
store / alw avs had my pockets stunned
with cigars" ''Yes; probably that
the reason you amt in a cigar store
now was the crushing reply.
"John," she said. softly, "nave you
been saying anything about me to
mother latelyg" mo" replied john
"why do you ask?" Because she
said this morning that she believed
YOU were on the eve Of proposing TO
me. Now, do not wish you to speak
10 mother when you have anything
of that kind to say. Speak to me.
and I'll manage the business Win
mother" And John said he would.
There lives in Leominster, on Cen
trail street, rather nervous Jour
year-old girl, who could never sleep
unless the room was dimly lighted.
One night recently the- lamp became
extine uished, and she called loudly
for her mother, who asked what was
the matter. She said between soos:
'The light is out, and 1 can see
whether my eyes are open or not.
A Pittsburg editor says: Illus.
bands are not made to order" Wen
bet he can't convince most wives they
are not. Washington Critic.
A Denver man has been arrested Tor
stealing three boxes of cigars OF the
value OF eighty-tbree cents box. Inc
defense will be insanity
A steward wrote to o bookseller IN
London Tor some books to fit up his
masters library. in the following
terms: I'm the first place ! want SIX
feet OF theology, the same quantity OF
metaphysics. and near yard oil old
civil law in folio"
New York daily papers often speak
OF "Long Island girls" but an inyesti.
cation shows that girls who live on
islands grow no longer than girls who
don't.
Irate father-"You remember you
wanted to marry that pookkeeper OF
mine about year ago." Daughter
eyes. father" "A pretty sort ola man
you picked out. He has decamped
with my whole fortune" You remem-
Der. father, that you told him he could
not have me until he got rich, don {
your" "0f course, the, young" II
have Just received dispetcL trc"'
him at montreal saying he is richnow,
but is perfectly willing TO marry q
poor mans daughter"
Little Dot-"I don't like to help wipe
Dishes" Omaha mamma-"Why not
pet?" 'If / learn how to do such things
Just right, Til grow up into a servant
girl, won't II" NO, dear. If you
learn how to do anything just right
you'll never be servant girl.
Don't be impatient. 1t will soon be
May Day, and you can put on your
Arctic cvershoses and winter over
coat. tie up your ears, and 60 out in
the wildwood and sit down on the re-
mains Of snowdrift and eat a spring
sandwich 1t isn't as il there was
nothing to look fn""'~-'