New-York tribune., 1888-03-25
SECRETS OF BALL-GIVING.
A CHAT WITH WARD McALLIsIER
Cow HE CAME To BE a FAMOUS BALL ORGANIZES
--RrMINIsCTNcEs or COTILLON DINNERS.


--RrNISlscnNcEs or CoT1Ll0N DINNERS.
The name OF the gentleman who manages the
balls OF the Patriarchs' Society in this city is
familiar to most people who read the newspapers.
BY many an aspirant for social elevation he is
REGARDED as q mysterious power, whose favor is
an "Open Sesame" or an ogre who stands
blocking the way TO the enchanting inner circle OF
Ncw-York society.
In social chat the other evening. Ward Nc
Allisicr dspellcd the idea that he an absolute
social monarch he is only representative OF tho
exclusivencss that must necessarily characterize
the balls which he conducts for society. His
looks are certainly not terrifying wellknit
frame supports large head: the open forehead,
genial brilliant eyes and benevolent features set
OF with mustache and imperial. combine to form
an expression that may be called fastidious or
judicial, but by no means unkind Representative
of an old Southern family, he lives with quiet
taste and easy comfort in East SIxtecnth-st His
LAWYERS education. tact and large acquaintance
stand him In good stead Ms a manager OF estates
and promoter of financial commercial or pohtical
enterprises whore diplomacy is essential. fore
noon devoted TO business an afternoon stroll up
the avenue. with an hour or two at the Union
Club. dinner party or ball IL the evening make
up his routine when in town. Travel. month
or two at Newport-where he has welLmansgsd
Iarm as VOL AS CottdSe-Witn ocraoion"i sA'Pc w
the oity, make up his summer schedule.
BEGINNING MS ExPEkIENtk Al NEWPORT.
well would have 10 60 back to the time
when | was married to get ut the beginning OF
my connection with SOCIAL festivities" said blr
McAllister, when requested to give his reminis-.
cences. That was in 1859 / went 30 Europh
came back in $50, ard spending the summer at
Newport, naturally fell into the social tide tn ere
and soon began to organize the Newport picrlios
Never heard of them? Well, you are young yet
! would organize small party hire steamer,
and 10 OF TO some place like Rocky Point, where
would have good luncheon, dinner ca clam
bake, with irolic and dance ana hoonIisht saii
home.
How did come to manage these thinEsp Well,
j hardly know myself. l appreciated az the out
set the importance OF enllstlng the leading men,
fathers OF families, who would stand oy me ana
make failure lmpOsslble. The next great thing
that l have always had TO insist on Is exclusive
uess. ball that any one can gam admittance
to is never attractive, while one tiat Is rigiuiy
exclusive will make invitations sought for by
everybody. Then / have always insisted on an
attractive and, If possible, novel place for meet
ing: the best of vianCs, VINO and service and, you
can add, the best Of music and most artistic floral
decorations There you nave TIE secret OF sue
cessiul bail giving in nutshell" . .
-" How old is the Patrarchs Society," Mr NC
Let's see. The Patriarchs started in '73 Yes,
but we had the Cotillon dinners before that. You
see | had to come to New-lOrk The damp air
at Newport did not agree with me. Well, VIC
organized the CotiIlon dinners you know; Per
haps sixty or seventy people would meet, have q
good dinner and dance the german oiter'Sard
" Who used 70 head then 7" 49,
There were Henry Coster and James Otis and
T. Burnett Baldwin. Yes, John g. HecRscher used to
lead too, and George Bend came on later on
see there were not so many millionaires in those
days, and few people we're spending tpelr incomes
One of these was Mr.. Belmont. l suppose ne
expended 500 600 or $40, 900 a year lie kept Q
chef at $50 or SO q month. which was thoNght
cxorbitant in. those days 1t seems absurd In
q chef and rays him 100 to sl50a month. Then
the chef often manages to get q commission of
90 per cent from tradesmen. SO hc nakes nice
salary You know the chefs at the HOFFMAN House
and Delmonico's get $4,000 yer.
OBJECTS OF THR PATRIARcNs' SOCIETY.
Well as society grew and fortunes increased,
rs we'll MS families, the leaders in society felt the
need Of an exclusive series of assemblies Mt which
to bring out their daughters and introduce to them
eligible young men Of good character, as well as
to entertain each other and foreigners or strangers
in the city This led to the organization Of the
Patrarchs' ballA and l WIS asked to supcrintend
their arrangements.
You know there fifty Patriarchs, who sub
scribe to pay for each seasons series OF three OF
four balls Each Patrlarch has five invitations
for ladies and four for gentlemen, besides his OVID
TO distribute and he asks whomevcr he plcasSs
The only safeguard as to the character ana ex
cusiveness OF The guests IS the high SOCIAL stannln9
safe by the rule that every invitation must beal
The name Of the guest and the name or tlu Patrl
arch issuing it, SO that il any objectionable person
Ihould appear at ball, the tickets would show
Gho had invited him. or her. But such thlns
aas never happened; every Patriarch knowing that
nc is the sponsor for the character OF the guests
ne invites The idea that some people have that
I exercised censorship over tho list OF guests
invited is erroneous, My judgment may be some
ferred to me with discretionary power as to their
distribution on special occasions, when Patrlarchs
are absent and cannot we'll send out invitations
themselves"
Might not the same person receive invitations
from half dozen different PatrlarchsP'
DUPLICATE INVITATIONS PREVENTED.
Certainly. There IS where my work como.
in, to prevent duplication Often there is rusl
of invitations offered to various popular people
The first Patriarch who sends me his list Of name'
has the tickets issued by me with the names o
his guests filled in forwarded to him. II thu
next List contains names already selected. the list
is returned for substitutions. / have to keep
therefore, record Of all the guests invited and
who invites them. The extra tickets are usually
rendered to strangers from other cities, and tt
Patriarch to erase the name of a guest and substi
tute another name He must apply for new
card Of To- Of >. R nd %
ter, the ticket being Irregular ana she was stopped
BY johnson until the matter was satisfactorily
on the list They are Robert G. Remsen: J. w
Hamersley, Maturn Livingston, G. II; Warren
and myself Others Of the original Patriarch,
were j. J. Astcr, Delaney Kane ST.: Alexander
S. McComb. F s. G.. d'Hauteville, " Butler Dun
Eugene Livingston, E. r. Smelling. and
w r. Travers. Mr.. Trayers used 20 be
rrincely entertainer and almost rivalled NJ
Belmont in hospitality The Patriarchs' ball'
were begun in Delmonco's Fourteenth-st. rcstau
rant, which I still think the finest assemo oly
room for the purpose that the city hns had
When Delmonco moved To Fifth-avc and Twenty
,sjxth-st VIC followed him ard have had every bal
since az that place except at the Metropolitan
Opera House The difficulty OF serving the sup
per at this last place prevented our repeating the
experiment.