davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1888-10-10
StOnewau JackSOn'S Joke.

Few men were ever more profoundly
and invariably serious than Stonewall
Jackson. Prior to the war he was pro-
fessor of natural and experimental
philosophy at the Virginia Military In
stitute; and while in that position he
made what is believed to have been his
first and last joke.
One morning he called up member
of the graduating class, and with the ut
most gravity prop ounded the following
scientific question::
"Why is it impossible 10 send tele-
graphic dispatch from Lexington &c
Staunton ?''
The cadet reflected for some mo-
ments, and then replied that the expla-
nation of this phenomenon doubtless
lay IN the fact that the amount of iron
ore in the mountain drew the magnetic
current from the wires.
A covert smile touched upon Jackson s
features, tied away, and he said: "No
Sir; you can take your seat"
Another was called up, but he too
failed to explain the mystery. A third,
and then fourth were equally unsuc-
cessul, Jackson listening to their thec-
ries with profound attention, but with
the same sly smile which had greeted
the first attempt.
This smile probably attracted the at
tention of the next cadet who was
called. His countenance lighted up,
his lip broke into smile in return, and
he said:
''Well, Maj. Jackson, I reckon it must
be because there is no telegraph be-
tween the two Places
"You are right, sir" replied Jackson,
who had suddenly resumed his COM
posed expression. "You can take your
seat"
Then he called the class to order,
and calmly proceeded with the reclta-
ton as if nothing had happened.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1888-10-10
Registration in New York City.
From the New York Sun.

In 1872, for the presidential election,
the total registry in New York city was
l49,0l0. In 1876 it was 1S3, 064. In 1880
it was 2l7, 023. In 1884 it was 240, 1856.
The probable total this year is 265,OO0.
The large measure Of increase from 1872
TO 1876 is attributable in part to the an
nexation in 1876 of the annexed wards.
which were, prior to that, part OF
Westchester County.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1888-10-10
Sick Headache

May arise from stomach troubles, biliousness. or
dyspepsia, and many persons are subject to peri
odic headaches for which they can ascribe no di-
rect or definite cause. But the headache is O.
sure indication that there is something wrong
somewhere and whatever the cause. Hoods sar
saparilla Is n reliable remedy for headache and
for all troubles which seem to require correc-
tive and regulator. 1t cures dyspepsia, bilious.
ness malaria. tones the stomach, creates an APP
petite and gives strength to the nerves.
II have been troubled for number of years with a
sick headache accompanied by vomiting spells. My
system all out of order, and in addition this
contracted severe cold, which caused terrible
cough / took Hoods Sarsapara. and it has accom-
plished much, that certain of speedy restor-
stion of perfect health The headache has left me
entirely and my system has come to regular work
ing order" Mrs. A. J. EIAMERMANN, 600 Thirteenth
street Milwaukee, Wis.
Hoods SaFsdpariIIa
Sold by all druggists. 81: six for SIS. Prepared only
b.C. l. HOOD g. CO., Apothecaries, Lowell. Mass
100 Doses One Dollar
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1888-10-10

A PASSENGER on west bound train,
from Chicago, hid his money in one of
his shoes, on retiring for the night, and
then placed the shoe and it's mate in
the aisle. near his berth. A porter,
having subsequently blackened the
shoes and found the hidden treasure. -
returned if to the owner, who is said to
have demanded light, SO that he could
count the money and see if the finder
had taken any.
ONE of the reasons why SCOTS Enoatlsi on
has such large sale is, because it is the
best. DR.. W. III. Cameron, Halifax, N. S.,
says: II have prescribed Scott Emulsion
Of Cod LiUer OIL, acith Hypopho sphites, for
the past two years. and found it moro agree
able to the stom ach and have better results
from its use than any other preparation of
the kind have ever used" Sold by all
Druggists.
IT would be unkind to give names,
and SO the mot loses most of its point
save as it expresses the truth about a
type by no means rare. One Of the
best of literary women in Boston said of
one of the men whose fame as writer
is very widespread: "I should like Mr..
better if he didn't always have 20
com nletely the air of doing his darned-
est - The phrase was not elegant, but
it was beautifully approximations
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1888-10-10
The Great Shut-In.

Miss R was telling her Sunday
school class of small boys about the
Shut-in Society, an organization whose
members are mostly young persons con-
fined with illness to their beds or
rooms.
"Whom can we think Of" said she,
endeavoring to awaken the interest of
the class in these unfortunates, ''that
would have had great sympathy for
these that are so shut in %
I know" said a little boy, with
hri ghtening face; someone in the
Bible, isn't it, teacher?"
Yes" said Miss R" and who,
Johnny?''
Jonah" was the spirited answer.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1888-10-10

Moxie has created the greatest excite
ment as a beverage, in two years, ever wit
messed, from the fact that it brings nervous,
exhausted, oyerworked women to good
powers of endurance in few days; cures
the appetite for liquors and tobacco at
once, and mas recovered large number of
cases OF old, helpless paralysis as q food
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1888-10-10
Some Foolish PeOnIe

the reach of medicine. They often say,
"Oh, it will wear away" but in most cases
it wears them away. Could they be in
duced to try the successful medicine called
Kemp's Balsam, which is sold on a positive
guarantee to cure, they would Immediately
see the excellent effect after taking the first
dose. Price so cents and 81. Trial size free.
At all druggists
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1888-10-10
How to Tell Ones Age.
rom the Philadelphia North American.

From the Philade1phia North American.
Just hand this table to lady and re-
quest her to tell you in which column
or columns her age is contained. and
add together the figures at the top of
columns in which her age is found and
Won h1uQ tho Oroaf coorot
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1888-10-10

JOHN DIcIUs died at La Crosse last
week. His friends would not believe
that life was extinct. The body WAS
kept in warm room several days and
efforts were made to restore conscious
ness. a physician who WAS finally sum-
moned pronounced the man dead.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1888-10-10

An Illinois woman, Indirectly through
the rebellion, LOST sight of her two In
FAINT children in 1870. Innumerable
times since she attempted to find them,
but IN vain, until last week, when,
through pension examiner she learned
that the long missing ones are alive and
happily married in Kansas.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1888-10-10

You've deacon: HHave YOU been out
of town? ?" Young man-ssNo sir-well.
[ was away a week or so a couple of
months ago" II supposed you had
not been here, because it is MANY Sun
days since have seen you at church.
You used to come regularly with your
sister" ooh she was not nv sister.
Church was the only place her parents
would let her 60 with me- But it's all
right now. We're married. Philadel-
ghia Press.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1888-10-10

Get Lyons Patent Heel Stifeners applied
to those new boots and they will never run
over.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1888-10-10
Liberated from Their Fetters

By the helpful, genial action of that most benef-
1cent OF aperients, Hostetter's Stomach Bitters
the bowels soon throw off the burden that par
alyzed and weakened them, and resume their
normal freedom of action. The action of the
B!tteIs. unlike that of average purgatises, in
wolves no gripping drenching. IT it did it
would, like them. be valu less for ordinary use
There Is nothing ungentle or unnatural attend
ing its operation. Upon the liver, no less than
the bowels, its action Is most benign, promoting
healthful bilious secretion, and directing out
OF the wrong and into the right channel. Con-
jointly with costiveness. other biliousness symp-
toms disappear when it is Systematically used
and the stomach is STRENGTHENED as we'll as regu-
lated by it. Malarial complaints, rheumatism
debility, nervousness and kidney troubles are
completely relieved by II. Sleep and appetite
are Invariably promoted by it.
Jamestown weekly alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1882-1925, 1888-10-25
A Squeeze in the December
Wheat Market Confident
ly Expected.
The Old Man Has A. Sinch
Which He is not Slow to
Make Use of.
Prices of the Cereal Tending
Upward in the Liver
pool Market.

CHICAGO, Oct. 23-The Mail says
there seems to be no doubt but that there
will be a squeeze in December wheat in
the immediate future. Fairbanks is
thought to have given up enough of his
pile to leave the old man master of the
situation once more. OF course, he can
not run up any ~ corner on December
in the last week of October Two dol
lars for December wheat at this time
would bring in receipts from every
wheat raising country on the globe, but
there is plenty of time for him to squeeze
the shorts with temporary local press
ure that may cause a good many tongues
to hang out before long. The amount
he has gathered in during the past two
months is enormous, and there is no
doubt that he is going to put the screws
on. There is nervous undertone to the
market which betokens that there ''is a
hen on" Hutchinson sold little
December, but bought infinitely more
than he disposed of.
Jamestown weekly alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1882-1925, 1888-10-25
SPAIN ANO HER DisrURBERs.
Powerful Influences Used to Overcome
the Carlists and Zorillists.

LONDON, Oct 23.- The decision of the
Spanish ministery to convoke the Cortes
within the next three weeks for the pur-
pose of placating the populace by pro-
posing reform in the army is hailed with
delight in Madrid and welcomed as relief
in the provinces The Zorillists have
been especially active of late on the
frontiers and large amount of money
has been spent by them in propogating
their belief in the restoration of the
Pseudo republic which marked one of
decline which Spain in modern years has
sustained. In evidence Of the satisfac-
ton felt by the populace of the Spanish
capital at the decision of the cabinet to
defer to the demands of the people it
may be cited that the disorder which for
several days has prevailed has
almost entirely subsidized and the efforts
of the gendarnles to preserve order are
no longer necessary. However, peace
rant the authorities in assuming that
they may thwart the will of the people
by a policy of neglect, or Of oppression
and it is imperatively necessary to
peaceful solution of the difficulties that
the official promises be fulfilled. The
ablest detectives of the kingdom are now
engaged in shadowing Don Carlos, just
as they have been for some years en-
gagged in observing the movements of
Ruiz Gorilla, and, while neither of those
leaders may ever ascend the throne or
the presidential chair of Spain, both are
powerful factors in fomenting the dis
order which may at any time overthrow
the present government and plunge the
country into state Of anarchy which
may compel the greater European pow
ers to interfere to perserve the general
peace, The Queen Regent, although
woman of great force of character, yet
of sweet disposition, is in minority of
popular favoritism. She has construc-
lively the backing of Austria in any
endeavor to preserve the throne to her
son, the infant king, but in the precar-
ious circumstances hedging the dual
monarchy Emperor Francis Joseph has
enough to do to take care of himself.
Emperor William of Germany is credited
with the intention Of paying visit to
Madrid almost immediately and should
he do so he will no doubt inspire popular
belief that Spain's sovereign has his SYM
pathy even to the extent of armed as
sistance, whether this be true or not.
Certainly the German kaiser is in bet
ter condition to extend aid to t0ttering
contemporary than is the Austrian en-
peror and perhaps the pacitication of
Madrid and its immediate surroundings
and the inspiration of awe in the
breast of the Zorillists. the Carlists and
the irresponsible mob is the chief object
Of his contemplated visit, which is be-
ieved by many to be undertaken in de-
ference to the wishes of Francis Joseph,
whose magnificent entertainment Of the
young kaiser unquestionably demands
reciprocal consideration.
Jamestown weekly alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1882-1925, 1888-10-25
THE PARNELL CASE.
Investigation OF the Times Charges
again in Progress.

Investigation Of the Times Charges
again in Progress.
LONDON, Oct. 23.---The commission ap-
pointed by parliament to inquire into the
charges made by the Times against Mr..
Parnell, and other nationalist members
of the house of commons opened it's ses-
sion in the probate court. About a
month ago the commission held short
sitting and the scope of inquiry was de-
fined, and applications made for the re-
lease of certain Parnellites from prison
for the purpose OF obtaining their testi-
mony. Since Mr.. Dillon has been re-
leased Internationally on account of his
health. Mr.. Redmond and other prison.
ers will be released on parole when the
Panellite counsel desire it. Attorney
General Sir Richard Webster opened the
case for the Times. The attorney gen.
eral said that he would not treat the case
as having anything to do with home
rule, or with any Irish question The
inquiry would be made strictly into the
specific charges made against the Par
nellites in the course of tee Times O DON
nell libel suit. He then proceeded to re-
view the Times articles on ''Parnellism
and Crime The court room was well
filled with representatives of the press
and those interested in the case. Mr..
Parnell and many nationalist members
of parliament were present.
Jamestown weekly alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1882-1925, 1888-10-25
EXPECT A SMALL WAR.
When the Manitoba Government At
temple to Cross the Canadian Pacific

When the Manitoba Government At
temple to Cross the Canadian Pacific
Tracks.
WINNIPEG, Man, Oct. %. Grave rrou-
BILE is expected to-day when the govern
ment attempts to force a crossing of the
Canadian Pacific railroad track. AL
Saturday night and Sunday Supt Whyte
remained at the scene with large gang
of worklnen, for whom sleeping cabooses
have been provided. Provisions for a
long siege have also been sent out. To
resist the force which the local govern
ment will bring out, the Canadian
Pacific railroad has induced three magis-
trates, its employees, to make requisition
for troops, and accordingly a local force
has been notified to hold themselves in
readiness. Officers are resigning, and it
is improbable volunteers will turn out to
fire on their friends. The Mounted In
fantry school, located here, numbering
$50 strong, have orders to be ready for
action on a moments warning, and the
Canadian Pacific railroad has arranged
to run them out by special train, if trou-
bic begins. Saturday the company had
hose attached to its engines to turn steam
and hot water on the crowd, should they
attempt to force a crossing. Citizens are
very indignant and talk of blowing up
bridges and other property if the com
pany persists in it's outrageous conduct.
Jamestown weekly alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1882-1925, 1888-10-25
SUPREME COURT DECISIONS.

The Lower Court Upheld In tho Cele-
brated Color-Blindness Case---Other
Matters.
WASHINGTON. Oct. 23.-The United
States supreme court rendered decision
in the celebrated color-blindness case.
The Nashville, Chattanooga & St. Louis
Railrord company was fined in the state
courts of Alabama for employing con-
ductor who had not been examined for
color blindness, as required by the laws
of the state. The company sought to
prove the law unconstitutional. The
supreme court, through Justice Field,
holds that, if as has been previously af-
firmed BY the court, the state has right
to examine railroad employees for gen.
eral fitness, it may also examine them as
to their fitness in ono particular. The
Judgment of the lower court is affirmed.
In the case of the Western Union
Telegraph company ". tho Common
wealth Of Pennsylvsnis, the United
States supreme court reversed the de-
cision OF the lower court. Tho COM
monwoalth levied . tax on kilograms
from points IN the stete to points with
out the state, and, In fact ON al business
passing Over tho oompany's lipss In the
states. The cuurt, Through Chief Justice
Fuller, holds that tho commonwealth
was not entitled to collect exospt for
measures wholly within The state.
Jamestown weekly alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1882-1925, 1888-10-25
EDITOR PuLsIFER'S DEATH.

strong Assertions That 1t Was Caused by
Bullet Fired by Himself.
BOSTON, Oct. 23.-The announcement
of Col. r. NJ. Pulsifer's sudden and mys-
terious death caused sensation on the
street and in the hotels. There are only
seven persons who have seen the body,
and only these seven know whether Col.
Pulsifer ended his existence with bull
let. The physicians who attended the
unfortunate man assert that his death
was from heart disease. but it is given
out on excellent authority that he died
by his own hand. 1t is said that Col.
Pulsifer had life insurance policies ag-
'gregating $500, ,0UO payable to his wife: .
Jamestown weekly alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1882-1925, 1888-10-25
THE w. C. T. U.

DOings of the Fourth Day of the Con-
vention at New York.
NEW YORK, Oct.23.-In the fourth days
session of the w, G. T. u, convention at
the Metropolitan opera house, the open
ing prayer was conducted by Elizabeth
S. Topey of Massachusetts and Mrs.
Emile L. Martin of Pennsylvania. Mrs.
Topey modestly requested the divine
spirit to descend and dwell in the hearts
Of the reporters present. At the conclu-
sion of the prayer Mrs. Secretary Wood
bridge read the minutes of Saturdays
meeting.
Mrs. Foster of Iowa, again attempted
to have her memorial presented and read
endorsing the Republican platform but
was prevented by the chairman, who
ordered it referred to the executive COM
mittee.
Mrs. Mary L. Lathrop, OF Michigan,
was called to the chair to preside during
the election of officers. Before Miss
President Willard retired, however, she
introduced Mrs L. NJ. Barry, represent
ing the knights of Labor. Mrs. Barry
made brief address rendering a frater
nal greeting to the convention in behalf
of the Knights and offering to cooperate
with the w. C. T. u, to suppress vice
ana crush KING alCOnOl.
A motion was made by Miss Willard
that sisterly greeting be sent to the
knights of Labor which meet at Indian
apolis November 13. The motion was
adopted.
Miss Frances E. Willard, reelected
president, receiving $50 out of a total Of
800 votes cast. Miss Wizards re-elec-
ton created much enthusiasm and for
several seconds handkerchiefs were
waved by the fair delegates. Miss Will
ard, on being escorted to the chair made
a brief address of thanks.
Jamestown weekly alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1882-1925, 1888-10-25
FEDERATION OF LABOR.
Chief Arthur Gives Powderly Cold Com
fort In His Pet Sehama.

Chief Arthur Gives Powderly Cold Com
fort in His Pet Scheme.
RICHMOND. Va, Oct. 23.-Chief Arthur
of the Brotherhood of Locomotive Engi-
neers, was shown the Philadelphia dis
patch containing Grand Master Powder
ly's letter to him rendering greetings
and asking if the brotherhood would
consent to fraternal cooperation with
other labor organizations, with view
to the proper and equitable adjustment
Of disputes, answered he did not know
what would be done on the subject.
.'Our convention consists of a large body
of men of various views Mr.. Arthur
added, land it would be idle to prophesy
what action may be taken on MIR. Pow
derly's letter. 1t is our desire to have
some unity of action among our organ
izations for self-protection. The Bur-
lington strike taught us that railroads
used other organizations as club to kill
us. Something probably like the pro-
posed plan OF federation will be agreed
upon but that is only an opinion"
'.Will the federation plan include
other than railroad organizations"
II think it will include all the railroad
organizations, though. of course, we
wish to be friendly with all labor organ
izations." ,...'..
There seemed to be only "a cold COM
fort for Powderly in what Arthur said.
Jamestown weekly alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1882-1925, 1888-10-25
Puzzled Over DisInfoction.

JACKSONVILLE, Fla, Oct. 2S.---There
were ~ new cases reported for the "a
hours ending at s p, M, and four deaths.
Churches generally were open to-day for
the first time in many weeks. The
question of disinfection is still puzzling
the authorities. Surgeon Gene raj Ham
ilton wires that he will confer with
President Cleveland and learn his views.
Jamestown weekly alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1882-1925, 1888-10-25
Yellow Fever Bulletin.

FERNAND1NA, Fla, Oct. 23.-The re-
port for the twenty-four hours ending
at six o'clock Saturday night is: New
cases II; deaths 1. The weather is very
warm, but favorable. Considerable
destitution is reported among the sur
rounding settlements.
Jamestown weekly alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1882-1925, 1888-10-25
AForm,d.b,e Rival Of Jute.

CHARLESTON, S. c., Oct. 23-Among
the cotton received here Saturday was
one lot of fifteen bales from Cheraw,
S. c., which was covered in bagging
made from Pine straw. The entire
lot was quickly disposed of and readily
accepted by the sorters. 1t is probable
that by next spring more than ten
factories for the manufacture of pine
straw bagging and mating will be in
operation between Raleigh, N. c., and
New Orleans.
Jamestown weekly alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1882-1925, 1888-10-25
shot by BurHlars.

XEN1A, Ind, Oct. 2S.-At O'Clock ..
m. Andrew Morgan surprised two men
who were robbing the store of Henry J:
Rsusmann. He gave the alarm, and
while attempting to stop ths bsrgla!s
Tho thieves escaped.
Jamestown weekly alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1882-1925, 1888-10-25
Removing Reading Docks.

NEW YORK, Oct: 23:-The much talked
of abandonment of the Reading railroad
coal docks at Elizabethport, N. j., and
the removal of all the companyis busi-
ness to Port Liberty, near Jersey City, is
assured. Superintendent Wallace has
received orders directing him to remove
the company's belongings to Port Lib
erty as expeditiously as possible.
Jamestown weekly alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1882-1925, 1888-10-25
Bethune the hampton sprinter.

ST.. LOUIS, Oct. 23.-The champion
ship sprinting meeting under the
auspices of the Professional Athletic
association Of America, whose object
was to settle the question of the sprint
ing championship of the United States
and Canada was held here Sunday
afternoon. Harry Bethune was the
winner of the contest.
Jamestown weekly alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1882-1925, 1888-10-25

Good humor is the health of the son
sadness it's prison. The humor of your
blood is not good; drive it out with War
ner's Log Cabin Sarsaparilla, and thus
drive out the sadness that holds you its
prisoner. 100 doses, 81. All druggists
Keep it.
Jamestown weekly alert. [volume] (Jamestown, Stutsman County, D.T. [N.D.]) 1882-1925, 1888-10-25
Snow Throughout Nebraska.

OMAHA, Neb., Oct. 23.-At y o'clock
Sunday morning rain storm set in
which continued until II. At that hour
the rain drops turned to snow flakes, and
tho fall continued until dark. Mengre
advices from points along the Missouri
river show that the storm was general
throughout the valley. At Nebraska
City the fall was heavy.