The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1888-08-25
BRIGHT BITS

AN ExousE-I say, Clara are you going to
Mrs. Shunby's in that dresss
Certainly. Why not?"
Isn't it rather-er- loud'2"
"Oh, well that doesn't natter-Mrs. Shunby's
as deaf as Sc post.-Judy.
But the worst of all isrns," said a lecturer on
sectarianism lis pugiIsm.' -
Il know worst ism than that" said lame
man in the back Of the nall.
What is ~"
Rheumatism Courier
BRowN-Big revival in St Paul.
Minneapolis Mau-Do no good.
Flow SOY"
Why, 100 years ago it took a wonderful mi
racle to convert st. Paul, and the stock of mira
Giles has run out.-DetrOit Free Press
CusTomER--I would like pair of trousers.
Floor Walker-Trousers? Yes sir. About
what price, Sir?''
Cnstomer-Oh, 50 or 81
Floor Walker-J0hp show this gentleman tn
the pants counter jladelphid CALI
TnAcHER-Johnny, is the sentence He sells
me watermelon" correctly Or should the
form be He sells a watermelon to me?''
johnny (who has had some practical expert
ence-lt depends on the melon. If it's ripe he
sells the melon. If its green he sells me, Mr..
Chicago Tribune.
so JONES has gone wrong too" said the
assistant cashier o the treasurer the morning
after the cashier had disappeared.
Gone wrongm replied the treasurer in dis
gust 81 should say he had gone wrong The
idea of trying to 90 to California when Canada
is only ten hours ride away. Why | could have
told him beforehand that he'd be nabbedr'-
SOmerviLie Journal.
SHE (iarinx up)-What do Won mean nv kiss
ing me. William Henry Smith?
w. H. S. humbly)-I-I-I meant no disre-
spect, assure you.
She (angrily)- Well, should like to see you
do il again, that's all.
W. II. S.--Here goes, then
S. smoothing her rumpled plumage)-You're
just awful.-Courier
VISITOR Ito convict)-what are you in for,
friend?
for stealing.
visitor-fhat's bad Can I do anything for
you?
Convict--F you could send me in pint of
peanuts sir, you would save my life was on
the force so long, can't do without 'em-Ne,o
York Sun.
PLEASE, sir, give a few cents to a poor blind
MANI"
Are you entirely blind?"
Eyes, sir
Haven't got anything for Won today
81 suppose you think because YOU wear tight
pants and have got your hair parted in the mid
die that you are somebody, You look Ike that
man who was hung in Washington county Inst
week, you long-legged, redheaded Raloot!'-
Terds Siftings.
ERE comes a benevOlent-lookin' old cove"
said perpatetic gentleman Of leisure to his
chum on the street corner; lets tackle him for
the price of a nights lof'fip'."
''Eon't yer think Of it, Bill, hastily responded
the other Selling his arm. Lets wait for
somebody that's half full. Them benevolent
looking ducks allus want to organize themselves
into a society, elect board o. directors an hire
hall afore they give ye a quarter. l don't
wanter stay up all summer?''-Puok.
willie" soTowfully observed the little girl
to her juvenile adorer, papa says I'm too
young to have a sweetheart, and | must quit
running out and PLAYING with you. lie saws
You mustn't come here so much"
I'm not afrai1 of your papa, Katie" said
Willie. stoutly. He needn't think he can scare
me because he's big dealer in lumber"
Yes, but he deals in shingles, Willie: big fiat
shingles"
That SOY, said Willie, turning away sadly
Chicago Tribune.