New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1888-04-18
HOW TO KISS.
The First Caress Must be,ouick.
Crisp and Elastic

Crisp and Elastic.
From the Chicago Times.
A kiss is the seal of affection. By
ron valued a kiss by it's strength, and
measured it's strength by its length,
but the measuration of kisses went
out of fashion long ago. A kiss is
duet OF lips, in which a most holy love
may be offered and accepted. 70 a
young man in the springtime OF life a
kiss is the delirium OF love-. Accord
ing 60 Niphus a kiss is at once the
token ofboldness, confidence and affec-
ton. A kiss is the rapture of bliss, the
messenger of love, the cable of the
heart, an indescribab1e, transcendent,
magical something that is at once a
feast and an Unsuitable famine.
Sydney Smith found much virtue in
a well-del1vered kiss, and the earl Of
Chesterfield looked the world over for
cool, caressing kisses. Harriet Mar
tineau, who never had any one to kiss
but vagrant bluestockings and the
neighbours babies, wrote about
"the kiss of the mouth that touches
not the mouth, and dear little Meta
Comstock would not take a second
time kisses that were not quick, crisp
and elastic. Kisses has been called
the hearts tongue. and though a
lover be never SO great an orator one
kiss on the lips OF his idolatress is Oft
en- more eloquent than q library Of
,lyc o oor oe
turned is the voice OF displeasure, but
a returned kiss betokens esteem.
Dickens valued kiss above a thou
sand kicks. Sir Sidney Garth lived to
learn that a kiss might prove a trail
tor in an angels dress. Walter Saw
age Lander seems to have had pas
sion for kissing crying women, for he
thought it delightful to kiss the eye
lashes OF love with fresh tears on
them. Poor John Keats wrote one
evening as he sat with his knee in his
arms toasting his toes in front Of
JEANNE WEIGH Carlyle's hearth-fre:
~ came to feel how far above all fam
cy pride and tickle maidenhood, all
earthly pleasure, all imagined good,
was the warm tremble of devout
kiss"
De Lewis called kiss the door that
opens the CITADEL of the heart, and
poets and people OF all ages have
found mysterious virtue, bitter-sweet,
magic, and elixirs, ard lotions of
greater or less potency, but the acme
OF human happiness, wrote a poetess.
is that we may kiss whom we please
and please whom we kiss. A kiss to
be q success must have mutual inter-
est; there must be reciprocity in the
operation, or somebody suffers the
punishment OF disgust. kissing an
unwilling pair Of lips is as mean vic
tory as robbing birds nest, and
kissing too willing ones is about as
unfragrant pastime as making Dou-
quets out of dandelions.
At the start the average man makes
a botch of kissing. The beauty OF a
kiss lies In it's impulsiveness and it's
impressibility, nor is it possible to
make the first one too brief. There is
danger in the attempt to make the
initial kiss complete. The girls won't
have it. There is too much audacious
avarice about it. The thing to do is
to go at the fair creatures lips slowly,
SO as not to brighten her. It is to
be expected that she will draw them
away from tine point OF attack, but
instead ofretreat the thing for hero
ism to do is to kiss her on some place
on the cheek, the temple, behind the
ear or on the hair. A woman's fan
cies are as branching as the trees of a
fHracf onI ho- ;ofo ofo 4<>
the swain the misplaced kiss may have
been, it will, if lett TO itself, make the
cipient wondrous indulgent next
time. She will caress the spot where
your lips have been, look at the place
through a hand-glass and dream Of
the one who placed 1t there. When
sufficient progress has been made IN
the love-making to warrant the ideal
kiss, take it methodically, with both
hands and "the gentle touch that love
can teacn." Let theleit arm 60 about
not her neck, to wrinkle q crepe-lisse
ruclle and muss q 75-cent couture,
dressed tor your special benefit, no
doubt-but about her shoulders.
Take her chin in the right hand, all
lowing the three fingers to touch the
pretty white throat. holding the face
with the thumb and forefinger, which
will form a sort OF wise for loves con-
quest. Move her head to one side and
a little backward and approaching so
as to make the quartet of lips de-
scribe the diameters OF an imaginary
square, kiss her twlce-the second
double the length OF it's very short
predecessor. This double kiss is a
clew to a mans culture. Only the un-
couth, ill-bred lover kisses as he
learned to country units. The gen
tleman who has the good fortune to
be born in an atmosphere of refine
ment makes a duet of his first
and final salutation, whatever may
be the numerical value of the interme-
dates. The well-bred girl wants
short, swapping kisses. that pop in
audibly, but still that pop. A kiss on
the hair is the kiss of a poet. tender
ness is implied when the lips press the
eyelids; reverence is spoken when the
brow is caressed, and protecting love
when the cheek is empearled,
Nothing can sanctify a kiss but
love, without which the sweetest lips
are unsavory and unWholesome.