The Hocking sentinel. [volume] (Logan, Ohio) 1871-1906, 1888-04-26
Bowser's Love Letters.
His Wife Produces Them at the
Right Moment and Makes
Him Squirm.

Him SQuirm.
My dear child said an old
aunt of mine the day l was mar
ried, have you got all your huS-
bands love letters p
OF course
and now lat vonr are mar
ried you will p ,obably burn 'em e
That's just What l was going
TO do
We'll don't. Keep 'em to the
longest day you Ia
But why p
Because they s. be stronger
weapons li,an T yonr tears,
pleadings or al suui ents. Moth
Ing will bring a husband to time
like the sight of some of the love
letters he wrote before marriage
/ took her advice, and amsal-
ways glad that l did. On several
occasions l have used Them to
bring MIR. Bowser down of his
high horse, and the fact that they
bother his peace of mind is prov
ed by the fact that he has sever
al times hunted the house over
in my absence i'll hopes to lay
hands OIL them.
Something went wrong at the
Office the other day and he came
home cantankerous. He held in
until he got to the supper table,
and then broke out with:
Got any name for these things
here's 2
Yes, dear. They are called
biscuit
well the man who calls 'em fit
TO eat ought to be shot2 Mrs.
Bowser, why is it 1 can never get
any thing decent TO eat in my
own house p
why. Mr.. Bowser! No one
could take more pains than we
do. In order that the biscuit
might be extra good / went out
and made them myself.'
sHumph =
There was a time, Mr.. Bowser,
when you raved over my cook
ing
Never! I knew from The day
I set eyes on you wading across a
mud puddle that YOU could never
cook. You can sing very we'll
as we'll as some bad actress
but you can't cook
And if l will prove that you
once hungered for my cooking
you will
L will give you fifty dollars in
cash.
After supper l went up stairs
and brought down several letters.
MIR. Bowser had got his nose into
a magazine and wanted the mat
ter dropped, but Tread to him the
following extracts:
And / thought, darling, while
eating supper that night, how
proud I should be over your de-
]icious cookery when we had a
home of our own. The thought
of those biscuits alone makes me
hungry: Goodbye, my pet
Who wrote that 9 sternly de-
manded Mr.. Bowser.
'You did,
when
Three months before our mar
riage.'
'Neverl'
ABut here's the letter, dated
and signed
1t is a base forgery, and the
forger must beware! How could
l have praised your cooking2
You also used to praise my
singing. Mr.. Bowser.
'Neverr
oh, but you did. Let me read
And, precious pet of mine, let
me again thank you for that
beautiful song, The Lovers Fare
WE'LL and The exquisite manner
in which you rendered it. It
drew tears from my eyes. aud l
was mol ashamed of them. You
have one of the purest. clearest
voices l ever heard
'Who wrote that 2 he gasped.
You did,
Mrs. Bowser, don't carry this
thing loo far! There is limit
beyond which you must not go ,
We'll, here it is, in your own
writing and over your own sigma
ture. Once in awhile you fling
out hint that / am very dull.
There was time when you
thought different
Look out, Mrs. Bowser!'
Yes, you,Sdld! You even
thought me the smarter of the
two.'
What! Am I awake or dream
ingp
Wide awake, Mr. Bowser. Let
me read TO you an extract from
this exhibit marked 'A':