Wichita eagle., 1888-05-22
UPON THE BALCONY.

Professor Paul Microbe sat intently gaz-
Ing at the house across the way, and for once
la his life lounged in a perfectly natural po-
sition, with relaxed and human look on his
face. 1t would have been plain to the dullest
that for once in his life, at any rate, the pro-
fessor had forgotten all about himself, his
stomach, his dyspepsia and malarial tenden-
eies, his theories on bacteria, and, more than
all, the important fact that precisely at
Bis it was his custom to partake of pint of
new milk scalded and two slices of stale
Graham bread toasted. The professor was
tall lantern jawed slabsided and sedate. He
lived by theory; in fact, life itself was the
Dry to him; he had theory by which he fed
bis stomach, theory by which he pruned
bis mind and made it sprout only ON the north
or scientific side, theory by which he raised
his children, and innumerable theories re-
garding diseases on which he wrote books,
taught in a college, lectured in Boston and
killed people in an experimental way. He
only ate certain foods, and then only at
certain times, and in the capacity of a
guest would have been, fear, thoroughly
impossible. A person who shifts at a salad
and asks suspiciously ''is that oil in it," who
holds your Hospitality offered cup of tea off
at arms length while he rudely queries
igreen or black!" who can't or won't ride
backward, nor sit in room without an &C
curately measured amount of ventilation, is,
[ contend, thoroughly impossible person
and not to be thought of as chum, a guest
OF in any of the more intimate relations of
life.
Professor Microbe lived in a city far re-
moved from this gay, seductive southern
BON ,1Yrfrrr for- I,,%
what with his theories, his dyspepsia and his
skim milk system of starving his stomach,
he had pretty nearly experimental himself
bff into the land from which no experimenter
has as yet returned, and had been ordered of
south for complete change of scene, food,
sir and mode of life.
Said his doctor to him: "For heavens
sake, man, quit fooling with yourself; shake
yourself together and live as God Almighty
Intended you should. You are monster
nova deformity. Eat plenty, drink
plenty, laugh, go to the opera, to the theatre,
dance, and, if Mrs. Microbe here will let you,
fall in love" "If that is your theory, of
course, doctor said that sandy lady. Mrs.
Microbe really was a lady who seemed to grit
In the teeth. The professor had married her
In pursuance of a theory, and the result Of
bfab marriage ndu DeSu TWO OF JHree SUTly,
unruly, i'll hammered cubs, who bid fair to
grow to mans estate heartily hating theories
and theorists.
And so, TO cut a long story short, the pro-
fessor came south, leaving behind him every
thing and everybody which comprised life
from his point of view. The savants well
coined him, and made much of him, there
fore he liked the south A man would think
1t fair summer at the south pole if only there
was some one there TO keep his vanity warm
But the hotel did not suit him, as he was
constantly uncertain about the new
ness of his milk and the age of his
Graham bread, and so, by a stroke from
Fortune-a merry dame who marked him for
victim, and intended to have some fun
with him-he found lodgings in a charming
old Spanish house in the very heart of the
French quarter 1t was a room quite too
lovely for Dissertation by dusty old profess
sor, however distinguished, who lived on
theories and oat meal mush and was full of
bacteria 1t was a front room IN an entire
Sol over a furniture shop, with arched
Spanish windows blinking out on balcony
OF wrought iron Of most exquisite beauty.
In a corner Of the balcony stood one of those
grand old water jars with peeling sides of
yellow, brown and salmon and which might
have held two or three of the forty thieves"
but instead was full of earth, for a splendid
rose vine that clambered all over the railing
and sent its tender, sweet perfume stealing
shyy into the room 50 desecrated by micro
scopes and bottles of liver pills and bundles OF
medicated red flannel. and the Lord knows
what in the way of instruments for the de
lection and location of bacteria.
There was faded Administer carpet on the
floor, q carved bed in which had slept q king
of France and a prince of Spain, an armoir
large enough for tomb for some Italian be-
nevolent association, dressing stand inlaid
with mother of pearl, cabinets, arm chairs,
tete-a-tetes covered in frayed brocatelles that
had cost a fortune yard, a pier glass that
one could not break with a sledge hammer,
faded tapestries at the arched doors, cid
marble vGses in the inches where once some !
demoiselle had prayed TO her shrined Virgin, |
and in the midst Of all this the professor. or,
to speak correctly, his belongings, for al the |
moment the learned member of a dozen /
scientific societies. the eminent Fellow and /
Phi. D., was hanging over the balcony watch I
ing the house across the way.
Wax tapers burned On the marble tableand |
the steam had ceased rising from the pint OF |
new milk in It's fragile bowl. but still lie sat /
watching the house opposite. lie saw
lights, colors AID many persons moving
about, chairs scattered any how in a fashion /
that would have scandal!red Mrs. Nj /
crobe, or the professor either, in his own /
house; books, music, flowers, magazines, an /
open piano, a guitar, dog all ruttlod up in /
old gold ribbon, a cat jingl;ng silver bell at 1
her blue neck, tray with glasses on It and q /
bottle that was neither lime water nor apol. /
Inaris, nor yet ginger beer, and moving /
about here and there a glorious woman with |
night blaci, hair piled on the top Of her beau
tiful head. with bare neck ana arms, daintilv |
feet and laugh that seemed TO stir
the few remaining bristles on the professor,
head as he listened. so sweet and seductive
il YVES She wore black and white gown,
and once SIZE reached cut her long fair al,
after red roses cra:-lnled in a blue bowl She
gathered UP handful OF the flowers ard
fastened them on her breast, turning her
lead as she did, SO that the unreEarlcd !
ooker On had q most delicious profile of |
hroat, chin and oval cheek. AS the roses
uttered on their new. sweet shrine, the pro-
essor reached out his hand, letting fall, uu-
knowingly. . new work on bacteria, that lie
'ught to have been reading. but was not
dis fingers touched the rich hlaSsnn' of n