The morning news., 1888-06-21
BRIGHT BITS

The LAY OF THE LIoN-LUNGED CALIFORNIA BOYS.
From Frisco DER the Rockies,
With every prairie gust,
Is borne 30 lair Chicago
The howl of blaine or bust''
They're coming, Johnny Sherman,
solid thousand strong.
To wave the "Pum'd Knights feather
And sing the Maine mans song.
They may break down your fences"
And tangle up your wires"
Until you'n lose that honor
To which your soul aspires.
A CHAUTAUouA boarding house in the summer
time Is a place where the food is mostly fof
thouSht.-Netc Orleans PacdUune.
VOICE OF THE AGEs-Look not on the wine
when il is r0l!
suiggins-I don't, old boy; drink cham
pagne.-LUe.
II say my friend, is that gun loadeds''
We'll, for heavens sake, then, don't point it
at men'-PucLs
Mrs. DUME.EY-Out Of nine children the only
one living is Cousin Kate. Mr. Dumley-Cousin
Kate, the dressmakeT? Mrs. Dumley-Yes. Mr..
Dumley-Well that's all right Survival of the
httest, you KNOW Judge.
MINIsTER-W Wen, Bobby, l suppose you get
prizes at school sometimes? Bobby Meyer got
any yet, sir. Minister-Why, how is that?
Bobby with an injured air)-IJ'S because some
other boy gets 'em.-NedC York sun
MAMMA-Charles. dear what are those two
pages of names on the first part of your maya
zine? The list of subscribers? Charles (who
has just started new monthly magazine to fill
a l. +. VINO; those are the ediJors.-Burdette
Brown was counting charming widow who
turned deaf ear to his solicitations 1.-THE
door of my heart is closed" she mur1nured
''But," urged Brown, 'the late lamented could
not certainly have carried the key away with
him. Puck.
He was mumbling about tough steak and cold
coffee, and making himself generally disagree
able.
Don't growl SO over your breakfast, John, y
said his wife, ''nobody is going to take it away
from you. Life.
FASHION journal says that stockings
ornamented with twisted serpentS will be worn
with low shoes this summer. AS socks are not
mentioned, the opposite will probably wear
their snakes in the usual and time -honored
fashion.-NdShUilLe 4merfcdn.
FoND MoTHER-I do so hope that George has
studied hard at college, l have tried to impress
on his mind the value of a liberal education
Father-I am afraid, my dear, tnat you have
rather overdone the matter had to send him
a check for an extra $500 to-day.-Ltfe.
MRS Al can always find out right away
when have a servant girl who is in love.
Mrs. BLOW do you find outG
when she is asleep go into her room and
tickle her mouth with hair brush. If she
Fuckers up her mouth that is sure sign that
she is in love, and mistakes the hair brush fo..
"WHo was that young lady in black?'
"a friend of mine. Poor thingl She buried
her third husband last week, and her nerves are
quite shattered. fear she will not live to part
with fourth. ="
'She looks very young to have outlived three
husbands"
"Oh, they're not dead. She's from Chicago. -
Exchange.
KIN git marriage certificate mister, with
the gals name left blank?" inquired an agricul-
turisU.
~ guess So" was the reply; what's the
trOuble?"
None yit; but gals is like everythin' but
death an taxes mighty unsartin. There's goin'
to he weddin though, mister, and don't you
| forgit it. lid Bits.
Won BEATT-By .Jove old fellow, but I'm glad
| to see you! I'm dead broke, and thought you
| would lend me tenner for a day or two.
Van Speekplane-Well, yes, l would, but
can't afford to.
Won Beatt-Do you mean to insinuate that
| you think | couldn't return it?
Van Speekplane-Oh, not at all. You could,
but you wouldn't.-Jlttge.