The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1888-07-28
Many Chances.

Boston Courier.
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Many Chances
An old fellow, who, during some
time had been away from the Flat Bocl
neighborhood. returned the other day
and, upon meeting a friend asked him
if there had been any changes in the
community.
"Yas. Uncle Jesse. thar have been
a right sharp chance Nv changes,
an 1t pears ter me that this yere cur
munity Is a gittin' faster an faster
ever day. You know Boyle's old still
housep''
Mighty we'll. Dave.
Sold out, Boyle did. an the still has
been moved away"
"You don't say so!'
"Yas, reckon do. Know Lit Rob,
| bins?"
"Oh, yas."
Flung by boss an killed"
"You don't say sol!
Reckon I do. Know the old Mt
Zion church,"
"Oh, yas."
Frazier has turned it into a still
house"
.'Wall, wall. But with all the changes
Dave. thar pears ter be little inn
provement. Into a still eh2
Wall. Frazier allus did have a desire
to help his feller-man"
"Yas, that's fack. Knowed Aunt
Nancy West didn't your"
mighty WE'LL"
Snake bit her an she died"
"Wall, wall. Good old soul, want
shep''
None better, an she want no
SLOUGH in the Judgment NV Ticker. nuth-
er. Know Alb Henson?"
"Yas."
''Wall. he has fined the church an
lows ter preach"
"You don't tell me!''
''Yas, reckon l do"
Il jedge then that he'll quit sellin'
licker."
mo, not jest yit- He's been figger-
in aroun' tryin' ter find out how much
the folks on the Piney Comfort circuit
will give him fur preachin'. an says
that eff they'll make it with while he'll
let the Ticker 60, but they've got ter
make it with while. Lows. he do,
that he won't ride ten miles an preach
twice ever Sunday fur no brown jeans
coat par NV homemade britches, a
par Nv fuzluther brogan shoes an two
par Nv blue-yarn socks year. Lows,
he do, that he just nachully KANT af-
ford it. tell you whut, Uncle Jesse.
the folks Nv the Piney Comfort circuit
have got opportunity now of hearin'
some fust.rate preachin' eff they'll be
sorter liberal. Alb he's great talker,
an when he run for constable some
time ago he jest talked all round the
other fellers. Wy. he hit the table
with his fist an stood right thar an
called Newt. Spears liar. Vas, sab.
an you bet that when he gifts up ter
preach nobody better dispute his word.
That's the sort nv er preacher ter have
too, fur the hab t that some NV the
Piney Comfort boys have NV settin'
thar an disputin' ever thing the
preacher says sorter interiors with the
good work. Wy, last INNER one Nv
the Purdue boys told the preacher to
hold on a mint. an when he hir on,
wy, young Perdue got into argy-
ment with him. and got the laugh on
him an chawed him shameful. But
they wouldn't argy with Alb but wunst.
an then when they got through you
could rake up enough wool often the
floor to stuff piller with"
"Yas, you are right, Dave, but tell
me something about yourself"
Uncle Jesse, I've had the blamed
est luck a white man ever had.
"Goodp"
mo, the wust In the world. jest about
the time spring opened, an when wuz
so blamed busy plantin' corn that
didn't know whit ter do, wy, my
wife diod.''
'You don't say sop
"Yas, tuck newmonv an died. I'm
Gle Jesse, 1 know it don't look well fur
a man to brag about his wife. but
KANT hep out say that she wuz the
best hand ter kiver CO. n with hoe ]
ever seed. Vas. an that want all.
She could set out terbacker plants
with anybody. Pore Liza! Snatched
right off when she wuz Nv the most
user'
"You have had bad luck"
Il reckon l have; but that wan t all.
NV yaller boss fell Off n the bluff an
wuz killed, ez eff the loss Nv my wife
want enough"
THAT wuz powerful bad. Dave"
II amt through yit, Uncle Jesse.
An then. ter cap the whole climax,
one NV tho boys chopped down tree,
an it fell on my 'possom dog an kill
ed him.
..Whut the brindle one?"
..Yes, the one that Patterson offered
me ten dollars for. l never will gil
over that loss. Uncle Jesse. Jest tel
think how he could go in the woods an
find 'possum almost anywhar. No.
Uncle Jesse, l never kin git over it"
-Opie P. Read, in ArkGnsGw TrGveter.
Their Relations Misunders TODD
A crowd OF exclted men gathered