Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1887-01-05
BILL WYE IN THE SUNNY SOUTH.

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BILL NYE IN THE SUNNY SOUTH.
The tracks in the foreground are only
ideal tracks. They did not exist in reality
at the time l made the sketch. In the left
middle foreground stands the author OF
these lines, wrapped in earnest thought
and q pair of adult ear NUTS. He is about
to become the author of the tracks shown
in the foreground. These tracks lead to
the kitchen, where there is a warm fire.
A large magnolia grove may be seen by
going over the range of hills shown in the
extreme background and bearing Off to the
left about 300 miles. In the house there
is a case of Budweiser beer and a case of
Group.
The earnest gentleman in the foreground
has Just been out playing in the snow with
q fire shovel and is about to return it TO
the owner. He is less fluent with this in
strument than with the poker game, OF
which he is passionately fond.
In the background to the left of the to-
boggan slide, may be seen a family OF
Christmas trees in repOSe. The region is
noted for its Christmas trees, %rhOdOden-
drons and rheumatism.
Many people come here to spend the
winter and what spare change they may
have on hand at the time.
Beyond the farthest line of hills at the
back of this picture, and extending as far
as tine eve can reach, may be seen a broad
expanse of climate. Climate here is as
free as air. Such as it is, every one may
help himself to it.
| thought before l came here that |
would find the oriole fitting through the
soughing bows of the magnolia and the
knocking bird cooling to its mate, but as l
write the snow is nearly two feet deep on n
level, trains are not eXpected!for six DAYS
and the snow is still falling.
Imagine q slight, almost girlish, figure
like my own, clad in a crinkled seersucker,
a Mackinaw hat and u fire shovel, battling
with the elements and digging holes
through the virgin snow in order to get to
the grocery store.
"Yet, once | was pure as the beautiful
snow"
1t wasn't over twelve or thirteen years
ago at the outside.
| had thought that the OdOr of the Or
ange blossom and the mint julep would
float along upon the gentle brow. of the
soft and vOluptuOus air. | had pictured TO
myself u land of gentle sum and soughing
breezes, instead of which l seem to be the
principal sougher myself.
| was fool enough 10 imagine this q
broad and beautiful green State, with here
and there a dark red iSothermal line
across it, but the whole surface Of the
I, rtI, - .,,-nra1 lnaa Iaan with thA 9nmA
kind of snow that people select up in Man
itOba when they decide to perish and want
something in which to do up their remains.
People here say that this is an unusual
winter, and that is why | am utterly dis
appointed. I've been in Utah, Colorado,
Wyoming, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Iowa,
Maine, Oregon, Montana, Washington Ter
ritory, Pennsylvania, Michigan, Ohio, In
diana and Chicago in winter, hut in each
one of these localities l was so unfortunate
rs 10 strike an unusual winter. For thirty
five years and in various parts OF the
United States l have been the victim OF
this very thing. | said to my family last
fall: at looks now as though we are going
to have another of those unusual winters
here. We will 90 south just as soon as we
can and see how it will be there"
The result is, that old timers say they
never had such an usual winter since they
have been here, although the winters have
been growing more and more unusual for
ten years.
l thought that here | would sit on the
vine empowered porch all the livelong day
and smoke a cob pipe, while drOwsy influ-
enceS and enervatlng sloth would soothe
my troubled breast. SO far it has been
different. The houses are made to resist
the mild cold OF what may be termed a
usual winter, but greatly to the surprise
of everyone, there hasn't been a winter of
that kind since before the war.
Therefore the raw and chilling blast
comes stealing up through the shrunken
floors and seeks out the northern gentle
man who has left his winter underwear at
home in his trunk.
| am trying to tell the everlasting truth,
for l know that l shall be criticised, but
there is rs much winter right here to-day,
with less preparation to resist it and the
prospect of more actual suffering among
the poor and improvident, of which classes
there are great many, than anywhere in
the north where / have been.
What | reproach the Southern builder
for is for his absolute failure to build
houses that will protect people from the
cold. Last winter people ate their break
faSts clothed in fur overcoats and mittens
in Florida, and here comes a little furry of
snow, lasting three days already, and still
falling. while three tobacco warehouses
have already fallen in with the weight of
the snow on their roofs; but the houses
that will he erected here neXt summer
will he thrown together in the same wild
and reckless manner by carpenters who
yet fondly hope to witness a winter that
will fit their perforated style of architec-
ture.
If yOu will excuse me l will cease writ
ing in order to nail q bed quilt up TO the
window where too much climate is now
gently stealing in and freezing some of my
children.-BW Nye in Ner York World.