Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1887-06-16
sQUIBs.

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the dime just now?" "Only by sight"
Laynan-Deacon Icaes is prohibi-
ZIONIST, is he not? Another Lsyman-I
think so. l saw him in crockery store
the other day buying Jug.
Her gracious Majesty received another
batch of American female toads yester-
day at her regular weekly bareback ex-
hibition.
Ella Wheeler Wilcox says that "the
world has out lived all its passion She
is partly wrong. There is much more
yet to be written about the late war.
The worst thing about going fishing on
Sunday is that you have to take long,
roundabout road to get to the fishing
grounds without being seen.
Drinkwater and Rainwater are the
names of two politicians out west 1t is
safe to wager that hrewster can knock
both out at the polls.
1t is lucky for us the Colossus of Rhodes
committed suicide when he did. He
might have come over here and eloped
with our statue of Liberty.
Mrs. Spriggins thinks it shame the po-
lice do not take some steps regarding the
villainous behavior of the Washington
ball nine in stealing bases from the New
Yorks.
1t is with unalloyed pleasure that the
Bulletin arises to remark that the profane
name of Hell's Bend has been changed
to pleasant Grove.
An English statisticisn declares that
married men live longer and live better
lives than bachelors. There are a great
many things in this world that are diff
cult of explanation,
Where He Shone-At the ball-Grace
Whispering What lovely boots your
PARTNER has got, Mary! Mary (ditto)-
Yes, unfortunately he shines at the wrong
end.
He was Jewel" when she married
him; six months later he was her gem"
Wien the matter came up in the devorce
tr' al, two years after, she explained that
g. e. m. stood for green eyed monster"
The precedented amount of railroad
building now going on is proof that Am
orleans have confidence in the future of
the country.
Tha weather of the last week was favor
able to the growing crops, especially
throughout the corn and wheat regions of
the West, The big barns will be full again,
as usual.
And nov it turns out that there is no
s75,000,000 estate, nor any other estate,
awaiting the American Sands family in
England. However, the disappointment
is not so great as it would only have
averaged few dollars per head, any
how.
At an induction dinner some years ago
in kirriemuir an elder, referring to she
changes in the ministry round about, said
he had seen four changes at Dunniccheas
three had died, and ore had gone to. 2
better place
Almost any woman will sign her name
"Mary Frances" and take pardonable
pride in admiring her neat cali zraphy
and unique autograph. But if her name
happens TO be MARY Jane" she invariably
writes it Mamie j." Why rs this thus?
A very fine quality Of celluIoid, an ex
change says, IL being made from potatoes.
This statement ia doubtless correct, but
what excistes our SURPRISE is the fact that
no one has ever Thought of making a
cartwheel out of boarding house steak.
Chief (sternly) Late to office again
this morning Mr.. Thigpenn. This is
the fourth time within-Thigpenn
(calmly Yes, and I'm becoming rlore and
more convinced every day that the office
should seek the n.aa, and not the man the
office.
"You say you stumpedl Texas for the
Prohibition ticket. What popularity of
your audience struck you most fogcibly?"
"Well,' said the missionary, "tbe chunks
of clay and pieces of brick struck ne most
foreioly, but the eggs stayed by me the
longest"
Dir. Brown and Mrs Ferguson frequent
ly met at the house of lady friend
They seemed to be attracted toward each
other, but were perpetuallF quarreling.
Il can only account for 1t in one way,
said the hostess one day "they must be
secretly married.
Il wish I could afford to have the house
painted this spring" said Mr.. Clipper
berry as he stood in the trent yard after
supper and looked over his 6omioile.
"Can't you get it autographed p suggest
ed Mrs. Chippenberry. Autographs are
so much cheaper than real painting, you
know"
One of the most interesting machines
used In the laDadrles at Troy - called a
'whizzer." 1t dries clothes by making
900 revolutions minute One of these
days the wizzsp will be introduced into
the editorial Doom, and the bore who
persists in talking while the editor is busy
up to his ears will be invited to get into
the whizzer and dry up
Charles A. Dana, of the New York Sun,
is so fond of ane pottery thAt he has in
vested about 100000 in it. When Mr..
Dana feels lake playing ball IN the china
shop re will not need to go Cd hi. own
premises.
Celie Ellis, bright and pretty, is one of
the girls who have succeeded ON the stage
without losing her love for what is good
and pure. Among her intimates she Is
known az 1.-The little mother" which she
has really been 10 q large family of moth
erless brothers and sisters.
Thomas coanty Kansas, is named after
General Thomas, and all the townships in
the county are named after soldiers Of the
Eighth Kansas Regiment who were killed
in the battle of Chiekamaugs. That part
of Kansas should be especially attractive