The Ouachita telegraph. [volume] (Monroe, La.) 1865-1889, 1887-01-22
Common Sense in Etiquette.


reproduce part of an article on
"Common Sense in Etiquette" pre-
pared by Christine Terhune Herrick
for the Courier. Journal. It is aston~
ishing to note, many people of appar-
ent good breeding, and even social
standing, use carelessuess in regard to
les co,,ue,adaces. The Southerners,
everywhere noted as sticklers for gal
lantry and polish, are fast degener-
ating. We have known .nen on our
streets bow, in passing, to lady with
out lifting their hats, with the same
ind fferent ease wherewith we have seen
others perform the somewhat DANGER
ous feat of conveying rice down their
throats with a knife. 1t seems that
the "first law of nature" would deter
them from the latter, if no other cons
sideration.
The following article is worthy pc
rnsai:
The WOuld>be unconventional man
or woman sneers at the idea, and the
sueer is initiated by those who have
given the subject little consideration.
But in truth most etiquette sprang
from common sense and stands on il
as on a sure basis. The highest order
of common sense is that which moves
the members of any class of s0cie.y to
show consideration for one another.
AS civilization, culture and refinement
increase generally as one mounts the
social ladder, it results that the finer
observances of points of breeding, def
erence and occasional ceremoniousness
are found among the highest ranks.
Good breeding and the recognition aud
practice of etiquette are almost insepa-
rable.
A little thought will easily convince
the unprejudiced that many of the mi
nor usages, the small courtesies that
at the first glance appear useless and
absurd to the uninitiated, have their
origin not in a desire to multiply forms,
but in spirit of kindly regard for the
comfort of others and respect for the
fitness of things. In America, where
questions of precedence, of social rank
and of stately ceremonial have not yet
assumed the importance whicn they
hold in land where there dWells an
acknowledged aristocracy, it is safe to
conclude when form exists that there
is generally a good reason for it. The
man who kicks against established
custom in these particulars usually sue
ceeds only in bruising himself, with
out perceptibly ipjuring the object Of
his attack.
In no department of manners and
social usages is common sense more
clearly indicated than in that bearing
upon the Difference manifested by men
to women. Possibly it would be bet
ter to amend the phrase to the defer
eDce that should be manifested by man
to woman. The influx of foreign pope
ulation shows its Influence in nolhing
more strongly than in the growing
number of men who allow woman to
stand in horse cars, in the falsely go
called "Ladies' Cabin" of ferryboa,s
and IN other public conveyances. The
spectacle of a a"Ladies' Cabin" thropged
with weary women, maintaining an
uncertain footing when the boat
lurches, while the stronger sex are
comfortably ensconsed in the seats,
would move au American heart to hu-
initiation, could not one console ones-
self with the reflection that the
greater part of the Doors were probably
Of transatlantic nationality.
Fhe spirit that moves man to step
aside that woman may enter the
door before him, to refuse luxurious
chair while ladies occupy less easy
ones, to resign his seat in boat or car
with lifted hat to a woman, young or
old, to raise his hat again as he passes
her fare 10 the box or answers her
question, to bare his head at au intro
duction and to perform the number
less graceful little attentions that be-
come second nature to the true gentle
man, are all marks of that Difference of
the strong to the weak, which is the
more beautiful because it is yielded
willingly to those who have not the
power to compel it.
In the etiquette of the table, conn.,
mon sense may be clearly perceived.
The unwritten law that forbids guest
to take two plates of soup guards
against the surfeit that would destroy
the enjoyment of the remaining cour-
ses. The injunction that prohibits
rapping the knife with the fork in salt
ing food, is on the same grounds that
subdues the loud ratt!ing of china, and
tempers the necessary noise OF party
of diners. The rule against touching
fish with knife avoids the unpleasant
flavor impaired to fish by the contact
with steel, while even the apParent>
! Iy arbitrary Dlacipy of platFS fork 8