The Grenada gazette., 1887-06-25
FULL OF FUN.

"A tinsmith in the country has
sign which reads: Quart measures OF
all shapes and sizes sold here"
-Brown-"Hello, Jones! How's
your wife?' Jones Ga little deaD-
Very clustering and disagreeable
this morning. S. Agricultur,st.
-Teacher-"Ths wisest man thai
ever lived said: There is nothing new
under the sum-" Little Boy (enthusi-
astically)-"But I'll bet they never
had baby at his houSe"-M T.
Ledger.
--''Here. Johnnie, what do you
mean by taking Willie's cake away
from him? Didn't you have piece
for yourself?' "Yes; but you told me
! always ought to take my little broth.
cr's part-Golden Days.
A New York man rushed down
Broadway the other day, cutting his
throat as he ran. The demands Of
business upon u mans time nowadays
leave him little leisure for any Of the
social amenities of life. Detroit Free
Press.
Office Boy Ito Boston Editor)-
There's a gent outside, sir, with
fringe on his pants, what says he
wants to see the editor" Boston Ed,
itor-"Never say gent or pants,
James; and tell the gentleman We
don't want any poetry. .'-Puck.
Isn't he splendid pitcher'' ex.
claimed young lady who was wit
Messing her first game of baseball.
"Yes," replied her escort, Mickey is
a good pitcher but he's way off to-
day." "Is he? Why, he seems to hi,
the bat almost every time. Pitts.
burgh Dispatch
Collector Ito servant girD D-"Is Mr..
Jones imp" Servant girl-''No; he's
out" That's tib. saw him enter
here a minute ago II tell We he's
OUT II say he's not out; he's I'M
"Well, he's out of money, and that.
out enough for you, anyway And il
| was. -BOSt0n courier.
A scientific writer tells how water
can be boiled in a sheet of writing pa.
per. We don't doubt. We have known
q man to write few lines on a sheet oi
writing paper that kept him in hot
water for three years. Christian Il
Work.
-Paradoxical Phraseology-
carpenter fell from staging and died,
| And sorrow was known in that town,
| "What a pity poor John has gone up" many
sighed,
| While the pity was that he went
Boston Budget.
| A woman is bound to have the
last word. When the editor Of the
Psdvine demonstrated with the prin-
cipal contributor of the poets corner
of this valuable sheet for writing on
| both sides of her paper, she quietly re-
t,rted, well. and don't you print on
both sides of yours?' ''-Boston Tran.
script. T
I'm writer for an undertaken:
J'uiHdl' Sail hiuNts. Wlicll asket lls
occupations. "Do you ever have any
of your contributions rejectcd?' asked
his friend. 'Oh, yes was the ready
response; "but. when they are returned
rs being too gloomy, lremail them to
comic paper. and they are accepted
with thanks - Drake's 1rarelers'
Maga.ine.
Pictures We're Too Costly. a
reckon We'll have to give up the idee
IF putin pictures in the parlor
Miranda" remarked Jeremiah Turnip
seed, as he threw the bride under tn,
:able. "Why?' asked Miranda. "Too
dear! Why, priced one at the city to-
lay, and the dealer 2, scz he
That's an old master; its price is
$4,000 Why seq I, it looks like
secondhand pictur'. Yes, it is, seq
he. Then. thinks l, If a secondhand
pctur' costs that much, it's no use to
price new un. SO, Miranda. Ireckor
we'll have to hang up a few notices.
God Bless Our Home. and the like.
and let the picturS CO. Pittsburgh
TbroDir1, Tplp0rupb