The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1887-08-12
MY BABIES.
"Reminiscences of a Husband and
Father.

Father.
There wasa time when looked upon
the author of "Helen's Babies as a
confound-Tlo q consummate falsifer.
My wife says that nothing but the
purest and most refined language
should be used in the presence of chill.
dren, and that they are never too
young to be impressed by the sounds
around them; consequently all-well,
I'll call them torcibEe expressions,
have been avoided since the advent of
'AIphonse, our eldest boy; and since
the arrival of belmont the most SUBJ
dued and pathetic-looking man that
walks the streets of c. answers to
the name of Pa" not only at our
house, but on the street, from back
yards and alleys, from anywhere and
everywhere. Now, as j was SAYING,
instead OF looking upon the author as
man who manufactured all of those
yarns, I'm prepared to say the half
was never told, or else those young
sters were too saint-like to live TO
mans estate.
: Why, only last week, from the hind
er end of street-car, / heard shouts
of 'Papar' ''Papar' and caught
glimpse of some little ragamuffins
who looked like, | couldn't tell exactly
whom, but / grinned with delight
when thought they are some other
fellows boys getting free ride, and
he, poor fellow, will soon be chasing
around after police officers, and their
whole neighborhood win be in an up
roar till the ''little dears'' are found.
AS the car passed me rather ia pidly,
did not give them second glance,
but soon found myself at the bank
where have the honor of being cash
Ter. An hour later when deep in con-
versation with the president and sew
eral of the directors, with a BEG par
don for interruption, but you are
wanted Immediately" saw big
brawnY policeman before me, who
said; John Smith,"
My Drain reeled, my knees shook,
and iii the second that interviewed be-
fore the entire system collapsed, like
drowning man / reviewed my whole
past life. Had |, in a moment of
alteration of mind or somnambulism,
robbed the bankP Concluding that |
had, / was just off, when 'Tll find pa
myself, DEL and "Shut up, Alph, y
shouted in the next room, acted as a
tonic, and once more blood flowed
through my veins, and my heart at
tended to its legitimate business.
T The door opened, and the smiles of
The company did not add to my com
placency as looked upon the boys,
who, after washing their faces in mo-
lasses, had covered the lower part with
pine needles (my wife intended to use
them for stuffing ''head rest''), and
made 'whiskers just like papa's, they
said, and after accidentally killing one
of the bantams l bought the day be-
fore, they had pulled out the feathers
and ornamented their heads.
" ASh WV 'IQOh lIlGIu Ill
they told him they ''were going to the
bank to see papa, " and he, like wise
man-at least he thought himself one
-''concluded to accompany them and
save the distress of the family, ii their
loss became known"
gave the man five dollars, and told
him | would double it if he would take
them to their mother immediately
That little job off my hands, l went
back to business, to be slightly an
noyed, however, by the ecstatic ex-
preston that had overspread the face
of Brown, the teller, who, I'm sure,
has never quite forgiven me for Win
ming Julia.
The more 1 thought, the more
wrathy grew, and decided that both
boys should be fogged-severely
fogged-notwithstanding l had acute
recollections of my own childhood,
and had thought it possible to greatly
improve upon Solomon's and my fa-
theirs method. We had tried love
through thick and thin, though when
they were trying to pick out little
katharine's eyes my wife did shake
them, and when Alph tipped over the
step-ladder to get Del of she threatened
to whip him,
When | went to dinner two such
gentlemanly little fellows met me at
at the door and held up their sweet
and rosy faces for kiss, / hadn't the
heart to disturb the unusual serenity,
and thought it best to overlook their
little (0 pranks that time. please,
papa, will you forgive usP" each little
boy had said, and Well, perhaps
you can understand how it ended.
Alphonse is five years old and Del
mont three and half, and the other
day my wife said it was quite time
III " were in Sunday-school it was
almost too much to risk them in a
class with other children, so she de-
cided to experiment by taking them to
church herself.
l suggested 'headache," but when
she looked at me SO reproachfully, and
remarked; ''As the twig is bent, ="
ETC., andIknew what she thought of
my indisposition. / concluded to do my
duty by my family, let modification
and every thing else stand in the way.
Our pastor overlook us, and being
very fond of children, he addressed
many of his remarks to our young
hopefuls In fear and trembling ]
listened. All went well till my wife