Sturgis advertiser. (Sturgis, Dakota [S.D.]) 1887-1???, 1887-10-12


wasi telephoned to- you yesterday.
You spoke to me as il it were Mamie,
and made love TO her.
Jerry: You must be we'll! / never
spoke to either of you! haven't COM
naunicated with You through the tele-
phone for three days.
Alice: You didn't speak through
the telephone to me yesterday thinking
it was Mamie.
Jerry: No did not.
Wife: The telephone has also been q
solemn witness to your depravity, sir!
To-day you spoke to me under the inn
preston that 1t was Alice.
/: spoke to you, to-day! Not that 1
am aware of! But listen to you when
you were not aware of it but thought
you were communicating with Jerry!
M. W: communicated with Jerry!
l haven't used that telephone put once
in three days and then it was to dis
cover your peridy!
Jerry: The mystery deepens! Per-
haps you can explain sir. why [ over
heard you yesterday using very suspic-
ious language to this lady.
Alice: He wasn't talking to me!
I: WAS replyingto a communication
Of the day before
Alice: didn't communicate with
Kim the day before
M w. 1t was me he was speaking to
Jerry only he didn't know it.
/: You-and / didn't know your voice
asked if it was Alice and you said yes
M w. II know did but it wasn't!
I: Why did yen say SO, thenP
M W.: o because because l recog-
nized your voice and / wanted to know
what you had to say to Alice.
/: So you were jealous of me before
you had any causeP
M. W.: My suspicious were well
founded, as it proved, for heard you
tell her that you cared for her as much
as ever and to beware of your wife
you wretch!
Alice: Indeed, What right had he
to say that to meP
/: Because--because thought you
were making love to me the day be-
fore.
You mean to say you didn't ring
me up yesterday, at half-past 10P"
Alice: Yes, I do. 1t was jerry l
rang up and talked to, or thought l
did.
Jerry: You didn't talk to me,
Alice: Then it must have been you!
And you thought was making love to
you? What conceit!
| Jerry: Well, there's that much
cleared up. She didn' intend to make
love to you, and when | thought l
heard you talking to her to-day you
were talking to your wife who knew
you thought it was Alice. Alice. dear
girl, forgive me!
Alice: Not SO fast! I should like
to know how you can explain your ex-
traordinary conversation with me the
other day when you addressed me as
Mamie.
| Jerry: tell you l have not been at
the telephone for three days; it must
have been Tom.
! 1: 1 begin to see this {! | thought
you were my wife.
| Alice: You did !! Then why did you
say YOU were Jerry All! l see
You wanted to hear what your wife
had to say to Jerry!
M. W.: You have displayed greater
power of suspicion than acuteness. It
seems you mistook our voices twice.
I, l: Then il wasn't you telling Jerry
you couldn't accept his presentsp
4 M. W: His presents, indeed! |
should think not.
Alice: It was l, and thought / was
talking to Jerry; and you were under
the impression that you were speaking
to your wife, and that she thought you
were Jerry and was making love to
him, and l saw you thought it was
your wife and thought you were Jerry
making love to Mamie. 1t is all clear
to me; / forgive you, Jerry
/ Jerry: What donkey haYe been,
to be sure.
I: And the other time was talking
to you, Mamie, when I thought it was
Alice, and you thought / was making
love to her, when was really trying
to prevent her from, Us l thought,
making love to me!
Alice: What impertinenee! can't
get over it!
Jerry: And / overheard him, and
knew by the words he used that he
must be talking to Alice. "MY wife is
suspicious ha, ha!
| (meekly): Will you forgive me,
Mamie, for my cruel suspicionsp
My wife: Yes, indeed; | was just
as cruel!
Alice: You are both well punished
for your deceit and curiosity. But how
absurd for us everyone to be suspect
ing the others, and all innocent.
! Jerry: Next time, Tom, when the
telephone bell bell rings, please inquire
who is wanted, and don't be SO ready
to think that girl is in love with an
ugly old married man like yourself.
Alice: Next time, Jerry, don't
eavesdrop!
Jerry: / never will again, my angel!
M. w: Next time, Tom dear, don't,
be so quick to suspect your wife. and
learn to distinguish between her voice
and someone's else.
/ assured her in the most humble and
fepenant. language that was fool
and knaye, and would never do il
again, and thus our little comedy of
Telephone Errors ended happily
after all.