Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-12-03

1t will cost you shilling-12 cents-tt
send letter to Albany"
Say" said Blewitt, '..just bury me, viii
you? [ don't belong in this century
Stage coaches, y cents postage! Tele.
graph him, then p
There goes another new word" said hi.
wife, in solemn voice, and she wetted {
cloth and laid it on his forehead, as she re
peated to herself, Telegraph what &
funny word %
Blewitt was in despair. Could it be
that all the common things of life were
to him dream? Had he ever ridden or
the cars? Did he ever own moving
machine? Vas there ever telegraph
pole in front of his house? He turned
his eye and looked out He only saw the
tall post and long pole of the well-sweep.
Along the other side of the road ran a
dense forest. He was willing to swear
where that wood was. Backed up against
the log fence was an ox-cart with neap
as large as young liberty pole Down
cellar he could hear the banging of an
old-tashioned churn. He looked up the
road to the east and saw the road was full
of great hemlock and pine stumps, and
! over it the doctor was coming on horseback
with saddle-bags before him.
Blewitt was man of determination, and
he arose from the lounge and went to the
door to consult his wife.
Maria" said he, "there has been
enough of this foolishness. You stare at
everything talk about, and can't locate
myself, or seem to fay in with my sur
roundings. Now, will you just answer me
one question:"
Certainly I will, if L understand it,
she said
"Well, then, who is President of these
ere United States p
"Why, John Adams, of course" she
said.
Blewitt sank down, and whispered in a
hoarse tone; "Then you never heard Of
Cleveland swingin' round the circle ?o
No, never" she answered.
Then all right. Shoot me, or put me
in bag and lay me away up garnet. |
have got through" said Blewitt. and he
went back to the lounge and fell asleep.
When he awoke it was Sunday morning,
and the whole family were stirring around
getting ready for meeting. His wife, of
whom he was somewhat proud, had put on
q NlCSS Will d waist dDOuI nine inches
long, and skirt SO tight that she could
hardly walk, and on her head such a bon
net! 1t made Blewitt hold his breath.
but he had got through talking. The bows
had on suits of full cloth and shirt collar
seven inches wide. Blewitt smiled, but
said nothing At last Mrs. Blewitt came
to him and asked him if he was going to
church.
Certainly, certainly" said he, "any-
thing to accommodate Tell one of the
boys to hitch a horse onto the top carri-
age"
"Top carriage! There you go again"
Well, then," roared Blewitt, Glitch
onto the stoneboat, hitch onto the ox-cart.
hitch onto anything. Have it your own
way"
"Why, we will go on horseback. You
on the saddle, | on the pilion behind"
said the wife.
"All right" said Blewitt, and away they
went.
Blewitt made some adverse remarks
about the singing at church which was led
by deacon with fiddle. The sermon
was too long, too. 1t lasted two hours.
On the way home from church his wife
appeared to be in fear of something and
urged him to hurry up. He asked her
what allied her, and she told him in a
trembling voice that his queer talk had
made the minister think him bewitched,
and he feared he would be burned or
drowned
Z" What kind of country is this, any
how ?" asked Blewitt.
Then Mrs. Blewitt reminded him that
in New England several had thus died,
and that everybody believed in it and the
Church was death on witchcraft.
"Then | guess we better light out from
here" said Blewitt, rs he clapped spurs to
his horse.
Away they went, rattle-te-bang over
stumps and logs and stones, and there was
rattle and roar behind, and he knew
they were after him. They came to log
bridge over Il brook, and they struck it so
hard that down it went, Blewitt and horse
and wife. and with a yell of despair he
awoke-yes, awolle, for the chair had
tipped too far back, and he was in a heap
on the floor with his head in pan of
apples and his feet in Mrs Blewitt's work
basket. lie heard the rafting vet, and
looked out of the window to discover its
source, and saw that the boys had started
the reaper in the field of wheat. One of
girls had Just driven into the yard with
the top carriage and was just taking out
the daily mail and had offered him a tele-
graph dispatch about his hops. His wife
was putting in tenor to the racket with a
sewing machine in the front room, and the
hired girl was backing the cooking range.
With pleased smile Blewitt sauntered
out to the wheat field, and, as the reaper
stopped, he said "Darn the good old
times These ere times is good enough
for me-"
What's that, father?" said John. 81
thought you was in favor of the real,
honest, reliable, good old-fashioned times
of a hundred years ago?'
Never you mind, john" said the smil-
ing father, you can go down and buy that
Thompson colt you've been wantin', and
let Charley have your side-bar buggy, and
say, if the wheat amt takin' no hurt,
yon may 90 down to Barnum's circus
tomorrow and cut the wheat next day."
lie looked down at his diagonal pants
and white Marseilles vest and muttered as
he went to the house: "Darn the good
old times, these ere times will dew fur
me "-Prof. Gouge, ID. d., LII. d., in Al
hmm ToUrn0I