davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18
BRIGHT BITS.
AND now the merry farmer boy
Goes running, gay and frisky;
He steps upon a rattleSnake
And fills himself with whisky.



AND now the merry farmer boy
Goes running, gay and frsky;
lie steps upon rattleSnake
And fills himself with whisky.
Nebraska State Journal.
''MIssUs FILM. heard that your son Carna-
Illus Stanley had lost his job"
1 say Job to yer MisSlIS CAVITY. Sure he has
an illigant JOB: he's telegraph operator and
does be goin about diggin phost holes for the
Western Misunderstanding star.
TWAS a six-dollar tile to be brief
But a fat party brought II to grief,
For she sat on it fat
What he said after that
Wedrepeat; but we've turned new leaf.
-Teras Stftings.
COOP BYE, my dear" said wife, anxiously
as her husband turned to go. Il shant have q
moments peace until you return. Oh John,
when will you nave saved enough to give up a
life so beset with peril and danger1"
Before long, dear, hope. Eut | must go.
want TO call the game promptly at O'Clock. "
-Neo York Sun.
I'VE will have to cancel your life in
surance policy, sir, I'm sorry TO say, remarked
the agent.
Good gracious exclaimed the frightened
Cobwigger; whatever is the matter?'
Why replied the agent. I'VE understand
you are going on a trial trip on one OF the new
steel cruisers. The Epoch.
JOB" said Mrs. Shuttle do you know that !
think we had better call our Sam The Volunteer
after this. -
why, has he been racing with any one?"
NO; but he runs away from us every day as
easily as the Volunteer does from the rest.
''Umph! guess a spanking breeze will put
him on another tack. '-HdrtJord Post.
PoNsoNBY-Sir, have come to request the
honor of yonr daughters hand in marriage.
Pompano-Impossble Never will give my
consent.
Ponsonby (anxiously)-Is your decision fixed
irrevocable!
Pompano (irmIy)-It is.
Ponsonby (much relieved)-Thanks, awfully.
Nellie has been pestering me to ask you. and |
did it just to oblige Philadelphia Call,
COMPOUND excursion parties
The sight of them benumbS
My heart when my piazza
They strew with greasy crumbs.
And when they fling around them
Their sly banana peels,
Again say, "Confound them"
+ AS upward go my heels.
By. Hotel Mail
SERVANT to the parson who is very i'll indeed
an wants to know If you won't give him the
hymns for next Stl days service?
Parson, feebly-Tell rim there will be no SER
vice; expect TO be dead before next Sunday.
Servant, exit and reenter-I you please he
says then will you be kind enough TO send down
the hymns you'd like sung at the funeral?
PEARSON RECEIVERS much more rapidly than
choristeT l-Br0oEiyn Eagle.
THEY were Americans seeing the sights in
Paris and they had their entire stock of bill of
fare French with them. Toward evening they
went into the cafe for something to eat.
Mary" said the old man, you do the
tallfn', l don't s'pose we kin make 'em under
stand
So Mary adjusted her eye glasses and said to
the polite waiter near at hand
"Garcon- ah-nous ulons-ah-souper."
The polite waiter hestated moment, and
then replied:
''Oim rally sorry, miss, but we niver have soup
for supper. Merchant Traveller
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18
MARRIAGE IS A PARTNERSHIP.
The Independence of Married People
Now Greater Than Ever Before.
From the Pail Mall Gazette.

From the Pail Mall Gazette.
Marriage is still only too often bargain, but
at least it is no longer an entirely one-sided bar
gain. 1t is tending toward the only true ideal
of lifelong companionship-a partnership on
equal terms, with equal gve-and-take on both
sides. Women no longer feel bound to render
that implicit obedience which was considered
de r1gttetT in our great grandmother's days,
and men no longer universally demand It,
Husbands, moreover, are beginning to learn
that their prime duty is not ito look after
their wives The very sentence is Indicative
of the most CHASTITY misrepresentation or the
whole ideal of matrimony. The general feel
ing of society condemns man who llsest to rule
his wife on the same principles as pasha rules
his harem
And indeed the whole scheme of modern life
makes it practically impossible for him to do
So A married woman enjoys, as rule, COM
plete liberty during the lvelong day, and even
at night il is frequently impossible for a busy
man to escort his wife Thus everything turns
on the relations between the married couple.
III girl is really in love with the man she
marries, she may be trusted with any amount of
subsequent freedom. If not, not; and therefore
we say that the injudicious and worldly parents
.ill-assorted unions are also responsible for the
many evil results which are to be seen in society
at this day.
For it is fact that rows of English girls are
as much forced into marriage as the French
girl, whose husband is selected while she is yet
in her convent. Not by main force, nor-but by
the whole tone of her education, by the exag-
gerated fear of being an old maid, by the OBJ
vious necessity of making way for a younger
sister, by the persistent scheming of her parents
and by her own longing for emancipation.
For marriage undoubtedly does mean enamel
patton to most women; and it is precisely those
who look forward to it most who are likely to
make the worst use of it.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18
Explaining a Made Language
From. the Ne,c York Tribune.

From the Neio York Tribune
Col Charles E. Sprague, President of the In
stitute of Accounts, gave a lecture before the
institute last evening, at the University build
ing in Washington square, explaining the new
international language. Volapuk, he said, means
world-speech, but this is not a good name, as
the language is not intended to be spoken
among the people of any nation, but only to be
used In correspondence among people of diff
ferent nations. International language" would
be better term. Attempts to make a common
language date back to about the year 1900 A. ID.
The fault of all of them has been that they tried
to embody system of philosophy. An enthu-
siast for one of these Col. Sprague said, had
had conversation with him, and had since
died The present system. Voiapuk, was devised
by Father Scheyer, a German priest, and pub
lished in 1881. 1t now has 100000 students IN
Europe, six periodicals are devoted to it, and
about sixty societies are striving to introduce it,
1t aims to embody what is best in all the
great languages with none of their bad points
and as English is more widely spoken than any
other tongue, Volapuk is 40 per cent. English.
There are no irregular verbs and no irregular in
Elections. The advantage of infections of any
kind may be questioned bnt Father Schleyer
would have been no true German if he had left
them out The effort is made to have no sounds
that are absent or defective in any language
and on this plan ''R," the English Fl" and
''TH, " and the German CHI are all left to-
gether in the cold. All plurals are formed with
S, Thus, the plural Of sheep, which is spelled
in ob Hoa aPT5 & T is ot translated Ge
Sprague placed the following sentence from
note that he had received, on the blackboard
'Nemi onSa lofik in volapukagaSed venik ella
dobol, spidob ense spodakadi penon," which
turned out to mean: Il having read your dear
name, in the Vienna Volapuk paper hasten a
postal card to write" The ingenious gardener
will be able to dig several English roots out of
this.
Col Sprague showed volapuk papers of
several countries, including a comic paper in
which the jokes were explained IN German.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18
The Reported Death of Stanley.

1t is impossible to say how much impor-
our dispatches this morning that Henry NJ
Stanley, the explorer, has been massacred
by natives, after having been deserted by
his escort. A week or two ago dispatch
was received announcing his death. 1t was
soon discovered that the Information it con
tanned was not correct. The present dis
patch, however, appears to be more au-
thoritative than the one of a week or two
ago.
Mr.. Stanley left this country some months
ago to lead an expedition into the wildsof
Africa for the relief of Emin Pasha.
His expedition consisted of $50
men, and from the accounts that have been
received from it he handled it in a mastery
way. One of its marches was through q
famine-stricllen country for $50 miles, and
most of the men, during this march, carried
heavy burdens of ammunition and other
stores. There were several occasions during
the progress of the expedition when a revolt
was imminent. On the way up the Congo
TO the Aruwimi number of the men gave
out, for want of rations, and between Stan
ley Pool and Bolobo hundreds of the carriers
showed very ugly disposition due to their
sufforings from hunger. Stanley however,
proved himself to be equal to the emergency
and promptly put the ringleaders in irons.
His severity on that occasion doubtless saved
the expedition from ruin.
The greatest discipline was maintained
among the men. When the expedition de-
barked from the lower Congo to begin its
land march it was divided into companies,
each with its captain and other officers. The
discipline was so perfect and everything
worked SO smoothly that the chiefs of the
tribes at the different Congo stations which
the expedition passed could not refrain from
openly expressing their admiration of the
manner in which it was managed.
1t is to be hoped that Stanley is yet living
and that his expedition will prove to be a
success in every respect. 1t must be ad-
mitted, however, that the positive character
of the dis.atch is calculated to create the
impression that the career of the great ex-
plorer is ended.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18
An Explanation of Riddelberger' 8
Conduct.

Senator Riddleberger continues to be
the source of sensational gossip at his home
In Woodstock, Va. The statement pub
lished in our dispatches yesterday was that
he does not know what he is doing If this
is correct it is pretty safe to conclude that
he did not know what he was doing on
previous occasions when he made himself
ridiculous. Ever since he has been a mem
Der of the Senate he has been the subject
of more or less gossip Of an uncomplimen-
tary kind, but his strange conduct was at
tributed to too much whisky.
His conduct in defying the court at Wood
stock was regarded as remarkably strange
for United States Senator, but owing to
his reputation, acquired chiefly in Washing
ton, of doing strange things, it was not
thought that there was anything the matter
with his mind If it be true that he is men
tally unbalanced there is some excuse for
the exhibitions which he sometimes makesof
himself in the Senate Chamber.
His friends ought to have him examined
as to his mental condition by insanity ex-
perts. If he is really unfit to attend to his
public duties, as well as to his private
affairs, his constituents ought to know it, in
order that they may prepare to fill his place
with some one capable of representing them
in the Senate. The people of Virginia have
been represented in Congress by some of the
ablest men who figure in the history of the
country, and they certainly do not want to
be represented now by a man who does not
know what he is doing.
With Riddleberger out of the way Vir-
ginia would select as his successor a man
every way worthy to represent her. She
has plenty of men within her borders who
would do her great credit on the floor of the
Senate. Riddleberger does her no good
there, and while the people of Virginia
doubtless wish him no misfortune, they can
not feel very great regret if an affection has
overtaken him that will unfit him for the
discharge of his Senatorial duties He GER
tainly has been great affiiction to them, and
if the way is opened for them to get rid of
him they can hardly be blamed for taking
advantage of it promptly
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18
ANNUAL SPECIAL EDITION
OF THE
Savannah Morning News
AND THE
Savannah Weekly News,


The Annual Special Edition of the DAILY
and WEEKLY NEWS will be issued Sept. 3. 1t
will contain complete and comprehensive
review of the trade of the city for the past year.
and will show the progress the city has made in
everything that helps to make up its wealth and
that contributes to its prosperity.
The facts relating to cotton, naval stores and
the different branches of the city's wholesale
trade will be so presented as to give clear idea
of the city's business for the year ending Sept /.
The business men of Savannah cannot make a
better investment than by buying copies of the
MORNING NEWS Annual Special Edition and
sending them to their friends and correspon-
dents. A newspaper like this Special Edition,
of this city, is the best advertisement of the
energy and activity of the people of Savannah.
Every citizen, whether he is a capitalist, mer-
chant, manufacturer, mechanic or man of leis-
is making, and in presenting 10 the world the
inducements which it offers to those who are
seeking homes in the South.
This Special Edition will be sent to all sub
large number of extra copies will be mailed,
thoroughly covering the territory tributary to
Savannah
Advertisers will find this Special Edition of
great value, and space in its columns can be OBJ
tanned upon application to the Business Office
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18
Stirring Times.

Dot shmall poy he vas habby,
Dot leedle girl vas glad;
Der dawg vas schared ind Schnappy,
Der fader he vas mad.
Der Sunday schools neglected,
Dot contribution box
Youst like could peen expected,
Vas gather in no rocks
Dot shmall poy safe each penny
Until he got some dimes;
OF he hat not got emmy,
He veeps dose roaring times.
Und now he hear der drumming
Der blaying Of der band;
Der circus it vas coming
Nit curious dings und grand.
Und now der shows beginning,
Der glory shtrike him dumb;
Der horse post he vas shining,
Der circus it vas come.
EMILE PICKHARDT
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18
Benefits of Life Insurance.

From the Lincoln (Neb) State Journal
Two men met In Lincoln hotel and man
number one asked the other what he thought of
the Rev. DIR. Talmage's remarks on life insur.
ance.
The greatest effort of his life There was a
great deal of sound sense in what he said BY
the way"
Il agree with you Life insurance is one of
the noblest privileges of the age. / was going
70 ask II you"
People who doubted the merits Of insurance
-N
"And represent the hight Hawk Insurance
Company. Couldn't issue pol"
You represent that rotten companys I am
the agent for the Vulturc Insurance Company:
didn't know YOU were In the business"
And didn't know you were. Talmage
made great display OF ignorance, didn't hey
Worst ever saw. But tits great card for
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18
A Surprising Reception.
From the Omaha World.

FTOWI UIt VUHHU " OIIH.
Book Agent am offering TO the public new
wo'k. the Encyclopedia Universal, Eternal, y
only fine
Omaha Man-Come in, sir Don't stand there
In the hot sun.
ing"
SCertainly There. take that seat by the win
dow am delighted to see you"
Permit me to explain. This book, glorious
work, is complete in forty five volumes, at S. a
volume and am the agent for it,"
II am sorry you brought only one volume
Can you get the rest soon 2"
"Oh, yes, but"
won't your
II beg pardon. This is very strange. Am
| awake or dreaming -
Yes. the house don't look very pretty, does
it You see this is private lunatic asylum,
and am one Of the patients"
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18
A Rat Story. Funny ana Singular.

ITTVFFt
In the rear of certain house some miles out
of town there is a small outbuilding used as a
wash-house and summer kitchen. One day an
old rat was seen TO come out from under IT,
which, from his peculiar appearance, attracted
attention. His ears were ragged and partly
gone, his tail was skinned and sore and he ap-
peored generally used up. He moved slowly
and carefully, and after watching him a while
it was seen that he was blind Another smaller
rat came out soon, and busted himself about the
the old one, bringing him bits of food and keep
ing near him constantly A dog barked across
the street, and instantly there was a eornmo-
ton. The younger one jumped toward his
blind companion, another rat coming to his as
sistance, and the two Selling the old fellow by
under the she'd out of danger lie was evidently
old patriarch Of the family, and his we'll
worn appendages were evidences of the fire.
quent anxiety of his friends for mis- safety The
above is a true well as a curious story
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18

Now, then, here comes the Washington
correspondent of the New York Star who
says that the story that Judge Pettus, of
Alabama, is to be appointed to FIJI the
vacancy on the bench of the United States
Supreme Court is untrue. Instead, the cor
respondent says, it is probable that Judge
Pettus will be appointed to one of the As
sistant Secretaryships of the Interior upon
the elevation of Secretary Lamar to the
bench. The slate is as follows: Assistant
Secretary Muldrow for Secretary, Second
Assistant Hawkins for First Assistant, and
Judge Pettus for Second Assistant. We
shall see after awhile.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18
index TO NEW ADVERTISEMENTS.

SPECIAL NoTICE-Notice to Water Takers; To
Stockholders Brush Electric Light Co.; Notice
of Mutual Gaslight Co.; Notice y Water Works
Builders and Contractors; As TO Crew of Swed-
ish Bark Anna Maria; Hats, at Jaudon's.
BASE BALL-Amateurs vs.. Montgomerys.
CHEAP COLUMN ADvERTIsEMESTs-Heip Want
ed Employment Wanted; For Rent; Miscel-
laneous
STOVES, ETc.-Lovell & baltimore.
THE LARGEST LTTHoGRAPHIC ESTABLISHMENT
IN THE SoUTH-The Morning News Steam Print
ing House.
: PrANos-L. & b. S. NJ. H.
AUCTION SALE-Beautiful Building Lot, by l.
d. IaRoche's Sons.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18
THURSDAY. AUGUST is. 1887.
Reai.te,ed At the Post Oeice IN Sordnnah.

The MoRxISe NEWS is published every day in
fbe wear and is served to subscribers IN the city
BY newsdealers and carriers, on their own &C,
count at q cents a week. 81 90 month, s. %
for six months and $40 90 for one year.
The MORNING NEws, by mad, one month,
81 90; three months, 81 80; six months, 50 co.
one year, $40 90.
The MoRNIYG NEWS. IN mail, six times a
week without Sunday lssuel three months
S. 90; six months, "a % one year, SIS o.
The MORNING NEWS, T11-Weekly, Mondays,
Wednesdays and Fridays, or Tuesdays, Thurs
DAYS and Saturdays, three months, 81 %; SIX
months Sc 50 one year. s. 90.
The SUNDAY NEWS, by maid, one year, 81 90
The WEEKLY News, By mail, one year u y.
SIIbscriptions payable in advance. Remit by
postal order. check or registered letter Cur
rency sent by mail at risk of senders.
Letters and kilograms should be addressed
"MnRNTNG NEWS Savannah, Ga"
Advertising rates made known on application.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18

Our dispatches this morning give the de-
tails Of another frightful railroad accident.
1t was on the Baltimore and Ohio railroad,
close to the Washington, d. c., depot. The
air-bralSos refused to work and part of the
train, which was running at high rate of
speed, was thrown from the track while
passing sharp curve. The accident was a
remarkable one in many respects. The
number Of people hurt was quite large.
But why would not the air brakes work
And it isn't explained why the brakeman
didn't put on the other brakes when warned
TO do So
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18

At the international prize drill in Chi
cago, next October spear corps" com
posed of women, will be present. They are
students in the Iowa Agricultural College,
The soldiers of the masculine gender viii
have their gallantry severely tested OF
course they will hnte TO bear off the prizes
from their fair competitors. IL is probable
too, that Cupid's darts will do much more
~~ecution than the spears Of the Iowa CORDS.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18
A Law that is Needed.
From. the Ney York World Dem.

From. the Ne,C York World (Deut.)
OF Mr.. Henry S. Ives Possibly there is good
ground for it. But the evil which is represented
"a the case of this very active young man needs
the attention of lawmakers more than it does
that of criminal prosecutors. We need a law
which shall render dealers and manipulators in
railroad and other corporation stock subject to
the same standard of honesty that governs mer-
chants and bankers
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18

II Representative Brady and his allies arc
after the scalp of Hon. J. To Henderson,
Commissioner of Agriculture, why don't
they say so, and try to take it openlyi
Ridiculous resolutions like that introduced
in the House the other day, concerning agri-
cultural convention badges, are mere childS
play, not at all likely to help the cause Of
Representative Brody and his friends.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18

A subterTanean current of magnetic wind
is said to have been discovered in Texas
II such a current has really been discovered
Texas is to be pitied, for her politicians are
windy enough to cause sorrow from one end
of the State to the other.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18

DIR. McGlynn says that the applause he
has received has not pulled him up or made
him think himself god. He doesn't deny,
however, that his vanitShas been increased
to such an extent that he thinks himself the
only man of real Importance in the country.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18

1t is said that there only two women in
the State of New York who stutter The
man thai made the discovery doubtless in
terviewed every woman in the State. That
he survives so much talk entities him TO
rank among the wonders Of the world.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18

The Arabians believe that the tomb of
Eve is at Jeddo, ON the shore of the Red
Sea. Il is 100 feet long and feet wide. II
Eve was such remarkably tall woman she
must also have been very powerful one,
and it is, therefore, not surprising that
Adam ate of the apple when she commanded
him 10 do so
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18

The total cost of tho Suez canal was less
than 500, 100000. So far the Panama
canal has cost 1915, 100000. and, if NJ. de
Lesseps succeeds in his plans, it will cost a
great deal more before it is completed.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18

The New York Tribune says that Presi-
dent Cleveland and his wife will stop few
hours in Memphis Miss, on their Southern
trip There is no Memphis, Miss, and it is
not likely that the people of Memphis, Tenn.
will relish the Tribunes exhibition of igno-
rance
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18
Riddleberger Is a Wonder.

From the Nelo York Star (Dem)
Rddleberger is wonder. His capacity for
making himself odious and disagreeable his
gitt of destroying honor and dignity in the
highest positions and importing into the noblest
arena in the land the manners and the flavor of
the rum shop-these are attributes of Riddleber-
ger that command our respectful amazement.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-18

In Van Worst Park, Jersey City, the other
day, 1900 dead English sparrows were
gathered up. It is supposed that they were
killed in storm that prevailed the night
previous. The incident affords a pretty
good idea Of the amazing increase of the
little pests since their introduction into this
country