Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1887-04-09
SARCASM AN UNWORTHY WEAPON


The Torment That Lurlzs in Honeyed
Chickering's.
Amber.
Better the smart Of a hair shirt than
the wounds of a sarcastic tongue" Sol
ONION didn't say that, but it ought to be
added to his proverbs. OF FL warfareg
there are none so deadly as those that
are WRged with the Indians. The saw
ages are so Rrtful and dsceiving. They
shoot from unexpected places, and over
whelm bravery by crafty artifice. The
foe that meets you on an open field you
can contend against, but the foe that
sneaks up behind you, or springs from
an ambush, you can never cope with,
even though you be a Custer for lion
hearted daring, or a Sheridan for brilli-
ant dash. And so in those blOOdlesa
warfares of words, waged, alasl in every
household. The adversary who comes
out with a vertiable thunder-gust Of wrath
never does the mischief that one does
who dips his tongue in the venom of sar-
casm, as certain ancients dipped their
swOrd-tips in poison. One can stand the
onslaught Of a fierce scolding, perhaps,
but che braVest are liable to strike their
cOlors In the beWlderment OF a sarcastic
trade, as a big ship breasts a tempest,
but lays low in a fog. Sometimes in
dulgent parents put pills in apple
sauce, and thus lure their little victims
to take the physic, but any smart child
would rather take the the pill as a pill
than run across its nGuseOus favor In q
sweet-meat. Give me an up-and-dOWn
whipping and will take it Ike a hero
but tickle the soles OF my feet and die.
Oh, If married folks, and brothers and
sisters and loving friends would only
take heed Of this, and lay it up as a New
Years maximi If you are bound to
quaIrel, quarrel with stable sWitchesi
don't use pin-points. Let your cause
for grievance be good round words
for weapons. not inuendOs and heart
thrusts. To Overwhelm an adversary
with sarcasm is like touching tender
spots with your fnger-tips aud pretend
! ing to be amazed that it hurts. Z de-
spise tortUOus methods. If you want to
Kill q chicken, chop of its head quick
/ don't pick out its feathers one by one
until It dies from the torture. IL you are
determined to ruin the happiness Of
your family and murder its peace, do II
quickly by open deeds OF wickednessi
but don't sit day by day picking out
feathers and touching nerve centers.
would almost be willing to say that
would rather be a drunkard's wife than
the wife Of a -blOOdeds sneering pes
siuist who would stand over against ev-
/ cry bright impulse and enthusiasm Of
my nature with q sarcasm, who met my
natural outbursts Of indignation with the
snowy touch Of a sneeE, or CONCEALED eV-
cry generous aspiration as frost locks az
q bright, flowing brook In mOveless ice
/ Certainly heart viii break IS surely
whatever means you take to break It
and the heart that is slowly crushed II
/ the press OF petty tyrGnnies that tread
out all its sweet and vital juices, is JUS
as much murdered as the heart that il
ground under the iron heel Of the demon
ram. Oh, my dear, there are myriad
ways Of killing hearts as well as bodies
! Let us be civilized, at least, In our meth
DDS, and fight our battles ike white men
not like SepOys.