Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1887-11-08
-zNssSNAiiIS~w
gaAky SWw
STORY OF A MISSIONARY.
A Chief Wants to Smoke During Meet
ing Time"-A Parlor Match.

q W
ing Time''-A Parlor Match.
A good story is told of missionary who
came among the Grows before their present
prosperous era to sort of civilize them and
prepare the numerous bucks, squaws and
pappooses Of the nation for the life that Is to
come A considerable number Of Indians
had assembled in the big council tent TO
hear the words Of the white medicine
man." his audience consisting OF old PIenty
Cones. White Horse, Two Bears and numer-
Gus other Absaraka gentlemen OF proml-
nence The red men sat around IN circle,
the preacher in the middle, and for q time
everything went as smoothly as the most
devout Christian could wish, but all at once
dad luck TO the thought, when the minis
ter was about half through his discourse
and had considerably alarmed some of the
congregation by his yehereeut gestures and
loud talking, the head chief present thought 1t
absolutely necessary for his further survival
and personal welfare TO have smoke. A
pipe with a stem from three and half to four
feet long was produced, filed with kline Ia
nick 1.-THE Crow Indians substitute for to-
bacco) and, with an old time flint, one of the
bucks proceeded 10 strike light. For some
reason or other the flint wouldn't work, so the
minister, who IN the meantime had suspended
his discourse until the confusion had subsidized,
in order to expedite matters, drew from his
pocket few parior matches those kind with
the bulb heads and the action Of dynamite
bombs and in a kindly and Christianlike
manner, without the slightest intention Of
harm, attempted to help them out of the diff
ficulty.
Now, as fate would have it, even the civil
lied "lucifers" wouldn't act any more than
the red mans flint While the matches were
fizzling, splitting and half exploding ct every
scratch, the Indians kept one eye on the mis-
sionary and one hand on their tOmahawks.
Another, and then another match was tried,
but without success.
All interest in the sermon was forgotten by
both teacher and pupils, the center Of attrac-
ton being in the match and the probable
outcome Of the white mans efforts. How
those dark skinned sons OF tho forest watched
the performance going on before then, and
how that poor missionary redoubled his
efforts TO make one of those COMPOUNDED
matches explode At last the thing did go
Off, and then-weIl, trouble i'll the camp I'M
mediateiy. Fizz! slap. bang. Kissed the
match, and what is worse, it kept on fixing
and exploding. Every Indian leaped to his
feet, whipped out his knife or tonahawk,
and, with ear splitting hi-hi-hi-ya-ya, hi-ya'S,
went dancing around the tepee in the highest
possible state of excitenIenr. They thought
it was a contrivanca Of the evil one to catch
them, and were determined to have blood.
AT last they quieted down somewhat, when
the minister explained matters to them and
presented the head chief with all the matches
he had about him; but there was an end to
preaching in that camp there and then, the
innocent cause of all the cOmmotion hurry
ing himself out of the camp and back to civ
illzation with the least possible delay.-Phila-
delphia Times.