Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1887-11-12

for instance, when a candidate is sick
he doctors-not himself, but the bal
lots; for all the world like the doc
tors-they never take any Of their own
medicine, and precious little of any,
body elses. And who ever heard ofa
doctor being sick.
*x*
They may boast of having big liars
up in the mountains of this State, and
of growing more marvellous stories,
but for samples of general versatility,
this town always travels at the head.
Ifthere are mo flies on Martinsburg,"
their natural laws of selection and at
traction have failed them.
~
The knights of Labor have struck
on cheap and attractive "ad," when
they outline their notices on the pave
ments. When that order gets sys-
tematized, it will be a potent power
in more things than one. All they
need is ballast. Almost everything
has crude beginning and evolves
itself to perfection thro' experiments.
Every new doctor is allowed to kill
his dozen. This is one way to keep
down excess of population.
-
AT the Exposition in Cincinnati,
last fall, seen theremains Of drum
that was the grandfather of them all
for size. 1t took man five minutes
to walk around it at 2:40 gait. 1t
belonged to fire company in Cincin-
natl, when that city was little town,
and it was kept in the public square.
When fire broke out the police
Numbered away on the drum to alarm
the people. The old gentleman who
had charge of it at the exposition, told
me 1t wasn't very affective-wasn't
built right, and was sold finally to
farmer, who knocked one end of it
out and used it for an oats bin. In
the general resurrection of the antique
in that town, it was hunted up and
redeemed for a good round sum-
While talked with him the bell rang
fire alarm and in two minutes time
the systematic fire department dashed
along the street. But that effective
system was not born in a day. So
with every enterprise that is for the
higher and better good of the people.
Give them time to adjust themselves.
~
Prof. Luscomb is home again after
a pleasant visit in Michigan. Mrs.
Luscomb and the late addition to the
family will return IN few weeks, ac-
companied by Prof Luscomb's sister.
49,
The City Band serenaded DIR. and
Mrs. 0. F. Welsh on Monday night.
Their congratulations were none the
less sincere for being loud. We ex-
tend our kindest wishes.
~
I'm sorry not to have heard the adj
dress on Woman's Mission" L
fancy / would like to hear what the
on that occasion knows Of orator
mans mission.
~
SOME LITTLE ONEs.-A 4-year-old
kid was being dressed one morning,
when he announced this important
discovery: "Oh, mama; I've got
some fur trimming under my arms"
The other one was little granger,
and looking out the window saw re-
fractory steer with a rail fastened to
the chain around its neck. Nanny,
nanny" called the astonished young
one, "here goes a steer a-makin'
fence" LEONE.
Many preparations professedly harm
less, prove exceedingly dangerous, but
DR.. Bulls Baby Syrup is perfectly safe
at all times. Price % cents.
A yellowish complexion is not at all
desirable; to Danish it, use Laxador, the
golden remedy for all liver diseases. 1t
only costs 20 cents.
First NJ. E. Church. w. f.
Roberts will preach in the M. E.
Church, on Sunday Oct. 18th, at II A.
NJ. and Up. NJ. Young peoples meet
ing at IS P. NJ.
Mr.. John Ream, our accommodate
ing miller, has removed with family
to Berkeley county, w. Va, where
he will engage in the milling business
at the Kilmer Mills, near Martins
burg. Mr.. Ream is a clever, energet-
ic gentleman, and we wish him sue
cess in his new home. The Ardinger
Mill at this place, operated by Mr.
Ream, will now be under the man.
agement of Mr.. Grant Lands as mill
er.
INDIAN SUMMERTIME are enjoy
ing at present the most pleasant part
of Autumn, known as Indian Sum-
mer."
"The sere and yellow leaves"
as they strew the earth, admouish
all that stern "old winter" is fast
approaching. Summer and early
Autumn, with their flowers, joys and
pleasures have sped into the past.
The song bird has HE'D away to his
southern home, and for the song of
Robin Red Breast" we have moth
ing but the chirp of the snow bird, or
the unpleasant cav of the crow. But
we have the assurance, though
"The melancholy days are come,
The saddest of the year,
OF wailling winds, and naked woods,
And meadows brown and sere,"
that "Smiling spring" comes on
apace, and if spared, may enjoy its
nlaaeuras once again Ever Remem-