Great Falls tribune. [volume] (Great Falls, Mont.) 1885-1890, 1887-01-15
BILL NYE ON CREMATION.

The subject of what we shall do with
ourselves after death is one that should be
duly considered at an early date. In all
seriousness, the soul is not the only thing
to be looked after, either during life or af-
ter death. We are...too. prone to neglect
our health curing life and then bequeath
our accumulated microbes and other re-
suits of a long and perhaps crooked career
to some slightly cemetery, ..set on a hill like
a city that cannot be hid.
Longevity is asgood ..thing, though I
have known publicsmen tosoverdo it. To
die at the proper moment and leave a
good impression onshistory is one of the
lost arts. To flicker out of life.with the
applause of a great people still ringing in
the ears, is a good thing; but man that is
born of woman, and the majority of them
are that way, are too prone to linger on
this side of eternity until they have done
some little thing that is neve properly ex-
planned on their tombstones.
But after death what shall we do with
ourselves? In this brief treatise I dare
not attempt to be thorough, or even lucid.
Leaving others who know all about it to
state exactly what disposition will be made
of our souls, let us look into the matter of
what we shall do with our bodies. / hope
that what I may say will not be regarded
as fippant, for this isino place.for fippan-
cy, but allow me to speak plainly of it, rs
| would on any other subject concerning
our health.
Death has some very peculiar character
istics. For instance, it will wake up the
dormant oldscrank who..has never missed
a funeral for sixty years. He goes for
miles to see the deceased" 1t is his hol-
iday. 1t is the one saving spot in his 9TH
erwise joyless life. We all remember him.
He is sometimes a woman.
The thought that the time will come
some day when this man will put on his
funeral clothes and come to my funeral
makes my tall hair rise up on end. He
cannot gloat over me now, but the day
may come when Ishall lie low, instead of
lying otherwise, as I do now; and he may
outlive me and come to see me properly
buried. Then he will enjoy himself! All,
what a blessed relief it sswould be could I
hover over the doorway when he comes,
and hear my footman announce to the old
vulture that he lis a little late, as Mr.. Nye
was put in the kiln half al hour ago"
could suffer a good deal through life
if / knew that l could at least head off the
funeral fiend-the man who wouldn't loan
me a dollar when | was struggling for
grub, but who cheerfully visits my funeral
and shows his approval in every possible |
way.
l must say in all candor that there are
many attractive features about cremation. |
I am sure that when cremation is placed
within the reach of all it will probably be- |
come popular.
In the first place, if the space between
life and physical humiliation could be
made just as narrow as possible, it would
be far more cheerful to consider. Death !,
itself is cruel enough, but to add to it a
of a public funeral and turn
our parlors into a giddy morgue, and then
in a crowded cemetery till the city
till the city wants the ground for a park,
and then to pick up our crumbling bones
and move away to a new grave. is not
cheerful to contemplate.
I have often thought that a cheerful
book of fifty or sixty pages might be writ
ten under the title of aRecollections of
or, the Diary of a Body" It