St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1887-09-29
THE OATMEAL GIRL.

Alfred moore was young, ITCH anu
tolerably good looking, and was looked
upon as desirable match by all his
feminine acquaintance, who grieved
to see him wasting his years, for, in
the feminine mind, unmarried years
are wasted. But there was something
serious the matter with Alfred-he had
a hobby. Any one who has a male
relative affected with hobby, wheth-
er it is politics, drainage, orchids, or
poultry raising can realize how serious
this matter was on learning that AL
fred's hobby was health. This I'M
fortunate young man had a dyspeptic
father and mother, and he had heard
more about ill health ever since his
childhood than if he had attended q
course of medical lectures for years.
His mother had to have certain articles
of diet continually prepared for her
dyspepsia, and his father, having a
slightly different style of dyspepsia,
had to have his meals prepared espec-
tally for his needs. The family atmos-
phere was always regula ted by dyspep-
STA; if depressed day happened to
take both parents at once, deep gloom
prevailed over the household. If de-
preston seized upon one parent on a
day when the other felt cheerful there
were apt to be conflicting breezes, with
u tendency to storms. On days when
both parents felt able to order pud
ding for next day Alfred knew he
might ask favOrs and obtain indulgen
cies, and he always improved the Oc-
casiOn, we'll knowing that the day af
ter the pudding would be one of dark
ness and despair. On cheerful days
Alfred's parents talked of nothing but
Of what they wanted to eat on gloomy
days they talked only of what they had
eaten. Having studied all these phases
of the fruits of good living, Alfred real
lied that though his youth had borne
him safely through years Of luxurious
dining there might be a wrecked di
gestion in store for him, SO he took adj
vantage of his four years of college life
to cultivate an abstemious appetite and
a habit of taking active exercise daily.
Thus his hobby thrived and grew, till
it demanded nothing less than that AL
fred should find for himself healthy
wife or none. For this eccentric frame
of mind Alfred's parents were directly
responsible, since it was impossible to
contemplate their sufferings, their tenn
that life would not be worth living I'M
der like conditions. But Alfred found
it most difficult to satisfy the demand
of his hobby, being fettered in his eff
forts by that uncomfortable old truism,
"Things are not what they SEEM" He
wanted partner for his fine and we'll
cared-fOr digestion, enclosed in the
frame of a pretty aud intelligent girl
but, though he knew dozens of delight
full girls, and could have ascertained
without difficulty the exact state of
their hearts (he being, as aforesaid,
young, rich and Handsomely he was
unable to feel positively assured of the
state of their digestive organs. Rosy
cheeks, bright eyes, rounded forms and
abundant hair were all present to his
sight, but how could he be sure that
their owners did not have "blue speHs,"
nervous attacks" and "temp'ry
spells r. Perhaps they also partOOk
daily of medicines-by spoOnfuls, by
drops in tumblers of water, by powders
at meal-times. Had he not seen all
these things from his youth up, at
home, even before his mother lost her
good lOoks9 His mother had been Il
beauty and belle, but years of dietet
ic mismanagement had reduced her to
the sem blance of a mummy.
''If one could catch a girl when quite
small, shut her up, and feed her prop
erly, happiness would be certain" re-
flected Albert. But as that could not
be conveniently done, in the present
age of barbarous civilization, Alfred
to find girl as nearly up to
his requirements as possible, marry
her Immediately, and while the word
"Obey" was still fresh in her memory
restrict her diet, form her mind, and
be happy.
There is sage old proverb among
the Persians to the effect that upon
every good resolve wait two genii, one
good and one bad. These parties
were doubtless on hand upon the even
ing when Alfred met FlOssie Brock.
This young woman had come from a
country town to visit AL
fred's cousin, Jane Moore. Some days
after her arrival, Alfred, with other
young people, was spending the even
ing upon the piazza of James home,
and, among other things, they discuss
ed their anticipated summer outings. |
Seashore, lakes and mountains were
and most of the party were to
be widely divided during August. In
spite of tempting invitations, Alfred
had secretly decided on a trip to the |
hunting grounds, when he
heard Jane say: "And here's Flossie |
going to that stupid farm, where there