davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-07-26


Train No. 1o+ leaves Guyton 3:1O p. m; arrives
Savannah 4:25 p. N.
Sleeping cars on all night trains between Sa-
vannah, Augusta, Macon and Atlanta, also Ma.
con and Columbus.
Train No 3, leaving Savannah at $50 p. m,
will stop regularly at Guyton, but at no other
point to put off passengers between Savannah
and Milleu.
Train No will stop on signal at stations be-
tween Millen and Savannah To take on passen-
gers for Savannah.
Train No. will stop on signal at stations be-
tween Savannah and O1illen To take on passen-
gers for Augusta or points on Augusta branch
Train No 8 will stop between Millen and Sa-
vannah to put off passengers from Augusta and
points on Augusta branch
Connections at Savannah with Savannah
Florida and Western Railway for all points in
Florida
Tickets for all points and sleeping car berths
on sale at City Uhice, No. 20 Bull street, and
Depot Office 30 minutes before departure of
each train.
j. G.. SHAW. G.. A. WHITEHEAD
Ticket Agent. Gen Pass Agent
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-07-26
Charleston & Savannah Railway Co.

CONNECTIONS made at Savannah with Sa-
" vannah, Florida and Western Railway.
Trains leave and arrive at Savannah by stand
ard time Goth merdan) which is So minutes
slower than city time.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-07-26
NEW ORLEANS FXPRFSs.
p m Ar .... Bainhridge

4:04 p m Ar. Chattahoochee .Lv 1890 m
Pullman buffet cars TO and from Jacksonville
and New York, to and from Waycross and New
Orleans via Pensacola.
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05
In q Dentists Chair.

Pretty soon the dentist stuck his head
into the door and told me it was my
turn. asked him how he had disposed
of the remains Of my predecessor so cas-
ily. He smiled more sweetly than ever
chair BY its side was a little silver
mounted spittoon, for use in case a vital
organ was punctured. told him | wan
ted the tooth drawn out front view,
cabinet size lie replied, that if didn't
like the proof uld sit over as many
times as liked. He had me there.
threw back my head and opened my
mouth. The dentist Involuntary
graspcd the side of his chair and said he
believed he wouldn't come in because his
f, ct were muddy. Then he ran his arm
into my face and began to feel around
somewhere inside. I seized his arm,
dragged it out of my person, and ex
planned that my tooth was still in my
mouth, that had not swallowed it. lie
said yes, he knew it. | suppose he had
parsonally Investigated. l never expert
enced such an instance of fellow feeling
in my life.
I've found it !" he cried, excitedly, at
last.
1--WE known where it was oil the
time" l answered with choked sar-
casm.
The dentist turned to his chest Of
cleaning tools and picked out ma hine
that l have seen blacksmiths use in shoe
ing horses. The minute the cold steel
entered my mouth I began to repent.
It felt its fearful wav along until it got
to tooth that suited it. The critical
moment had arrived The dentist leaned
forward, planted his head against my
chest, bra3ed both feet..against the wri-
ter, said, NOW look p'easant-won't be
long" and gave a mighty jerk. There
was a cracking sound in my brain, a
blending flash of cerebral lightning, 4
sensation like the disintegration of
worlds, and the tooth was cut. think
the root was wrapped about the back
bone, and had begun to sprout in the
shoulder blade.
"She's dlisy." painted the dentist.
'She's the best thing out" replied,
ldly.-SiriHgfeM (D.) GloJe.Reputlic
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05
Standing by the Soldier.

Circuit Judge McCallum, of Iowa, be-
gan his career at the bar characteris-
tlcally. His first case was before JUS
tice Of marked morality, who was ex-
trcmcly harsh with criminals. The
weakness OF the old Puritan was his
veneration for veterans of the war, all of
h" whom esteemed as unrewarded heroes.
McCallum had fought four years. His
client WAS thief. ct only thing |
can do for you said McCallum, after
having gained the mans confidence, sis
to imp!ore the mercy of the court. When
YOU 60 on the stand tell the whole
truth"
The man had stolen cow. killed it,
sold the hide, anil taken the carcass
home to his family, who were really
suffering for the necessaries of life. The
prosecution. with long line of wit
ncsscs, had made out perfect case, and
the brow of the Justice was draped in
omnous frowns when the prisoner was
called. Thn latter did as directed by his
attorney. concealing nothing-from the
almost starving condition of his wife
and family to the dressing Of the stolen
beef.
"Now your honor" said McCallum,
'the defense has no witnesses. Ny client
is guilty. He has hidden nothing from
this court. 1t is the first time he ever
transgressed the laws. lie was inspired
to do wrong by that instinct which we
even admire in brutes." Then, turning
to the prisoner as if the fact had nearly
escaped him, McCallum said: ''By the
way, you were soldier in the lac war,
were you not"
"Yes, SIR"
"Weren't you at Gettysburg
ayes, sir"
$50 was 1. And you were in other his
toric battles, fighting for your country,
while your wife and family suffered from
want at homer
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05
Astonishing tho Natives.

Signor d'Albcrtio. the Itllial explor-
er, in his work describing h 9 researches
in New Guinea, re ates how, having been
robbed by the Papuans, he succeeded,
without bloodshed, in so thoroughly
frightening the natives that they were
glad to make pelce with him on any
terms. He hoisted the black flag over
his house, issued proclamation that
while it was flying no one should APP
preach on pain of death, laid Grsini
bombs in every direction. and fired at
every one VINO pas ed that way, until
they were in state of complete terror.
Two of the leaders, Naimi Kupe and
Parama, made Overiures of pcace and
brought to ignor d'Alberto IA number
of the stolen articles. lie thus describes
the interview:
ITO impress more firmly on their
minds how much they had to fear from
me, treated them to several spectaclcs.
The first was to drive three balls in sue
ccs,ion into the truck Of tree 100
metres distant; the second was 10 let off
an Orsini bomb and the third, after hav.
ing induced them to break their lances
on blade o. iron. 10 send it to pieces
with ball from my fOwling ri, &C But
the last spectacle was the finest
"After having kept the two FOR some
time seated on great 10 X in front of
the house, led them to a 'SraBce, went
int the LOu,e. AMI set fire to Il train of
powder connected with a mi Z bored un-
der the rock on which they had b en-
seated: then joined them and directed
their attent on to the spot. While they
were looking the mine exploded. iced
less 10 say how frightened tn y were.
They had neither legs 10 run away nor
feet to stand and were hardly nblo to
pray me not to destroy them, and they
would recover for me al that had lost.
when they grew calm conducted
them t. see the effect Of the niue. The
ruak was broken in thousand frag-
mcnts. and scattered great distances, and
instead of the rock on which the, had
sat they found only hole. They looked
at each other trcmblingly, and a.ain en-.
trcatc me not 10 kill them. Naimi ask ID
PERMISSION t. take away n bit of the frac.
tured iron to brighten his people iato a
restitution Of the stolen goods, and a,
they descended the hill they gathered
fragments of the rock"
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05
"Where are your tickets,

"Where are your tickets, gents"
asked the doorkceper of st. Louis
theatre to line OF men who confronted
him in "Indian file" cts all right"
shouted man at the tail end of the line.
"I've got the tickets. There's twelve Of
US with re. Count en- as they 20 in"
"ln you go, gents" said the doorkeeper,
and he tailed of. eleven, who immedi-
ately mixed with the crowd within. The
doorkceper turned to look for the holder
of the tickets, but he had disappeared,
and eleven men saw the performance safe
from identification in the tremendous
throng of people.
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05

A small room in the New York City
Hall, used to store documents in, is prob
ably the scene of more marriage ceremo-
MES than any other room IN the country.
IIa.b.ly day pas Ies that one or more
marriages do not take place there. The
persons married are Italians and others,
with wedding outfits of the simplest
kind, who pay fees ranging from 10
cents to a dollar. The Alderman who
performs the ceremony charges nothing
for his services, but the fees go to the
person who looks after and works up"
this line of business.
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05
"They had robbed the till and gone,

"They had robbed the till and gone,
of course2"
"Oh, no. They had gone around the
counter, and my big dog had corraled
one in the potato bin and tie other be-
tween two molasses barrels, and was
biting them at the rate of forty bites a
minute"
Thu low was it too latc?'
why. when called the dog off and
'ooked the fellows over ] hadn't the
heart to kick 'em across the street. |
Just ed 'cm to the door and gave EN-
one lift apiece and asked 'em to call
again. | wish / wasn't so chicken
hearted about such things really dc"
-De.rou Free Press
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05
The Oldest Newspaper.

The oldest newspaper in the whole
wide world is the Ki"g-Pw, or Capital
Sheet. published in Ptkin. It first ap-
peared A. ID. 81, but came out only at
irregular intervals. Sine the year 1851,
however, it has been published weekly,
and Of uniform size. Now it appears in
three editions daily. The first, issued
carly in the morning, and printed on
yellow paper, is called Hanf- Par (busi-
ness sheet, and contains trade prices and
all manner Of commercial intelligence.
The second edition, which comes out
during the forenoon, also printed upon
yellow paper, is devoted to Official an
noTnccments and general news. The
third edition appears late in the after
noon, is printed on red paper, ami bears
the name of Tttdai- Pa, jtoGntry shcet,.
1t consists OF extracts flom the earlier
editions, and is largely subscribed for in
the provinces. The number Of copies
printed d lily varies between 1900 aud
1000.
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05
Two Strangcrs Called.

"You see, the way o. it was this" he
was explaining to patrolman on Baker
street Yesterday; was in the grocery
alone, and two men came in. They
warmed Their hands at the stove, and oac
of them suddenly began shutting and
smiling and tuen called out:
say Mi>ter, your kerosene is leak
ing all over the cellar
That ratified me, and / grabbed u
coupe Of matches and ran down stars.
l W down there couple of minutes
bSforc remembered
V'emembeI ed what"
That my kerosene was up stairs at
the back end of the tore. l hurried up
as quick As could, but it was too latc:@s
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05
IL Ought to Fetch Hir

Young Featherly had eaten fonr more
hot biscuits than he ought to have done,
simply because Miss Clara had told him
that she made chem herself, and Iobby,
with rerplcxed look upon his face. was
waiting favorable opportunity to say
something.
'Mr. "eatherly," he finally said,
"have you any matters on hand that
ought to be attended to at oncei"
"Well, nothing very urgent, Bobby"
laughed Featheriy. 'WhyT
because Clara told ma that when you
found out what nice biscuits she could
make it ought to hasten matters. ~
LJS
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05

The Rio Bravo Land and Cattle Com
pany has leased for ninety-nine years
tract of land in Mexico, 100 miles long
by six miles wide, for $500, 900. The
lsnd extends from a point fifty miles
from Paso del Norte. down the Rio
Grande, parallel with its course 100
miles. A monster cattle ranch is to be
established on the tract.
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05

''I'm asin monopoly said an Arkan
saw man at Il dance the other night.
Hits the ruination of the country"
Indeed it is" said DeFidg tt.
''What particular monopoly do you
think works the greatest hardship upon
us2"
"1he monopoly what's hurting me
wust IS that air Jim Smedlcy dancin'
with my gal all the time. ~ GoodalPs
Sun
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05

Thomas De Quinccys bold postulate
that q man VINO began by committing
murder might keep on in his career OF
crime until he would be eui ty of down
right in .ivility, has been proven true in
Colorado, where there has Just been
hanged, for stealing ten-dollar horse, q
man aho had ben tri for murder five
finfa
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05
Some OF "Sam" J0nes's Saying.

Following are pithy extracts from the
sermons of Rev. sam" Jones, the noted
Southern revivalist:
1t takes cold pew to make cold
pulpit.
There is nothing better in heaven than
religion.
Our actions of to day are tho thoughts
of yesterday.
A truthful woman is the greatest adorn
ment of home.
1t takes prayer, study and thought to
get up tirst-class Sc mon.
If you live in impure thoughts yoa
will be impure in your lives.
Profanity is more or less a profession
of your loyalty to the devil.
A church that can't do anything bus
keep itself straight is failure.
Nobody ever went to sleep indifferent
to religion and walked up in heaven.
A child is loved by God because it has
no opinions and wants to learn some
thing.
Dishonesty in the church is really
crippling the church more tL:c~ anything
else.
1t takes frst-c'ass preacher and
first-class nearer to get up o firN-class
sermon.
never heard yet OF q committee ask
ing for preacher that is popul;r with
God Almighty.
You can help your preacher, instead
of everlastingly calling on your preacher
to help you.
Don get into anybody's way with
your naturalness, but try to be yourself
wherever you 60.
Run into heaven barefooted and bare
headed rather than miss it on account Of
anything in the world.
If we're right we cant be hurt By the
truth, and if we amt right We ought to
be hurt righteously.
It's got so now that if you steal s.
they'll put you in Jail, but if you steal
$40, 900 they call you Colonel.
The trouble with the church is that 1t
is vast hospital; it takes all the web
ones to take care of the sick ones.
You show me man who keeps the
Sabbath day holy and I'll show you a
man that's Christian all the week.
The infidelity that hurts is the inf
deity OF the man who makes ont he's on
Gods side, and then won't I've up
Find me man preparing himself to
hear the Gospel and / can show you
man that is going to be benefited by the
Gospel.
The man who will break one OF Gods
commandments habitnally aud continu-
ally, if. you will turn him loose, will
break them all
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05
"Yes, sir"

~ cS, SIT.
The prosecution at this point saw the
way the case was drifting and attempted
to Tid;cule the ''old-soldier defence" as
thu prosecuting attorney named it.
Tnc elect on the old Justice WAS to,
arouse all his loyalty and indignant n.
"Fnou.h of this" said he, brinping his
hand down on the desk in front of him
with a laundering thud. 40 soldier,
no man who has shed his best blood for
his country. not even if he be criminal,
can bc reviled in my presence. The rris-
oner is discharged And, sir, when you
are suffering for the necessaries of life
again come to me-"
The joke was too good TO keep. Nc
Callum told the Justice one day that the
old soldier was an ex-Confederate, but
never again did McCalium practice in
that court Chiu ago Ac,cs.
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05
\ Neat RrtOrt.

Mr.. Evartss special weakness as pre-
siding officer at dinners is the inter iect-
ing of facetious comments on the efforts
OF the other speakers. He delights to
diffuse mirih aud good fellowship. and
his facetiousness never has the sting of
acerbity. Occasionally, in attempting to
score point on fellow speaker, he suf-
fers the fate of boomerang thrower.
An instance in point occurred at the
New-England Society d;nnerlas winter.
Mark Twain had Just finished in extra
ordinarily piqu mt address when Mr..
Eyarts arose, showed both Of his hands
down into his trousers pockets, as is h 5
habit, and laughingly remarked :
"Doesn't i strike this company as lit
tie unusual that professional humorist
should be funny"
Marx Twain waited until the laughter
excited by this silly had subsidized and
then drawled out doesn't it strike this
company rs a little unusual that law
yer should have his hands in his own
pocke!s!'-Nlu YORK. Times.
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05
BUDGET OF FUN.
HUMOROUS SCETCHES FROM
VARIOUS SOURCES

Down With MonopOly-It Ought to
Fetch H;m-A Neat Rctort-ile
Did Not Want His Hair
Trimmed, Etc, Etc.
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1887-03-05
He Did Not Want His Hair Trim med

ibc Oiu .Nob w ant MS Idtf lTiiEUicu-
l went down to sec my barber about
having my hair cut on Friday. / always
go down a day ahead and tell hun to
have his hair ploughs ground. While
was gossiping with the barber . man
about my age came in and threw him.
self into chair and called for a shave.
After he got his shave the bari er. as
usual, began to badger thu customer
about ''sea-folms," "shampoos, and
other knick-knacks that go TO mans di,-
comfort and BARRIERS pro rs. The old
chap wthstood the siege bravely Then
the barber tried him for a hair cut il the
usual strain:
"lIairs little ragged"
"Yep; like it that way"
Longer than you usually wear, amt
I'll"
"Gues, not"
''Bctter let me trim the backi'
"Guess not.
~ ooks as if it hadn't been cat fo- an
age"
SIT hasn't"
At this point the old man rose AMI
very politely drew off Il wig, disclosing
a pate underneath as | aid as a paving
stone. My barber offered to take out all
the peopE in the book to the nearest
empO ium il we wouldn't say anything
about it .Hinnea. oils TrG une
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1887-08-18
"Those Suffering Children"

Ed. Register-In your article of last issue
referring to the poor folks, mention is made
of the statement Of one of the ladies to the
effect that after "being resident of the
county one year the court would be obliged
to assist them" This was but the reitera.
ton of one Of our judges and was not with.
out modification, which is this: when they
come under the Jurisdiction of the court
then their unfortunate children (Which are,
fortunately, bright) can be placed in suitable
homes, already proifered, the blind mother
sent to an asylum, and this county may then
become burdened with poor cripple, who
has the misfortune to be poor, and In meas
ure helpless. Truly, "the poor we have al.
ways with u.s." And the Master makes not
our charity conditional, but says, "give to
him that asketh of thee and to him who
would borrow Of thee turn not away" I,
for one, do not feel the course pursued to-
ward these people condemnatory. The par
ty who did this proclaimed it not on the
street corners, neither desired to be "seen of
men," but your uncharitable thrust called
forth a statement, neither false or exagger-
ated, but in self-justifcation. Now Iappeal
to the Christian people-those who desire to
"lend to the Lord"-to kindly remember the
Inhabitants of "hazel dell" Let's help these
part! be ye clothed, warmed and fed without
giving the wherewith so to do"
ONE OF THE LADIES.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1887-08-18
Arcadia Valley Water Supply.

Your correspondent gu cle Pete, ," desires
"B. F." to correct certain mistakes that be
c'Uncle Pete") claims "B. F." made In an
article published in the REGISTER of August
4th, headed, ARCADIA Valley Water Supply
Now, Mr.. Editor, propose to take up but 8
very small space In your paper this week
"Uncle Pete" starts out with ''he has been
hold out any longer and see Arcadia abused
by niger boys, and last, not least, comes b.
F. and says Arcadia has two or three springs,
and that 'B. F. stands for Benjamin Frank
lin" &C., &c.
"Uncle Pete" says he has lived in the VAL
ley twenty-six years. Now, what do the
readers of the REGISTER care whether he
lived here forty years or less, or whether "B.
F." lived here or elsewhere, or whether "B.
F." stands for Benjamin Franklin or Beer
Foam? like good glass of beer with lots
Of foam or gas on top. think there is more
gas than anything else in "Uncie Pete's"
remarks about Ironton's springs. For"Un-
Gle Pete's" Information 1 will try and con-
vince him that If he has been In the Valley
the number of years he claims to have lived,
he is not very well posted in Ironton. Now,
Uncle Pete," you say Judge Emerson's
spring Is not in Ironton. Let me assure YOU
that Messrs. Clarkson and Crommer's spring
(that you speak of is not in Ironton, so you
are not tposted as to whether the Arcadia
Valley Co.'s property is in Ironton or not.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1887-08-18
COlOred Society Notes.

Our Third Quarterly Meeting will TAX
place at the NJ. E. church on the 21st.
On the Goth the Baptist Association will
convene at Pilot Knob. Several eminent
divines will be present aud good time i,
expected.
Rev. Abanatha attended the camp meeting
at De Soto on the 21st.
Mrs. Robinson, of st. Louis, is visiting hel
cousin, Mrs. Abanatha.
Mrs. Shaffer is also visiting her mother,
Mrs. Russell; the latter has almost recovered
from her serious illness and Is able to sit up.
Mrs. Vaughn passed an examination before
Prof. Scott on the 10th, and will probably
teach the first colored school at Pilot Knob.
This will make new era In the school his.
tory of the Knob, and we wish her success
as a pioneer of the project.
Mrs. Shelton has gone to Chicago to visit
her grandson. II she likes the city life she
will remain.
Hewee johnson has been quite i'll for some
time, but was some better when last heard
from.
Mr.. Isam Whitener, Of Poplar Bluff, is
visiting friends In Ironton.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1887-08-18
Personal.

Mrs. II. r. Charlton was in De Soto last
| week.
j. w. Emerson was in st. Louis several
days of last week.
S. w. Fountain, of the U. s. Army, was in
lronton Monday looking around, with the
view of buying a home.
Ed. AXE is In town.
Miss Alice Simpson, who has been spend.
ing the past six months in Carbondale and
st. Louis, arrived in the Valley last Satur.
day. She returned to the city Monday.
Jno. Clare went to St. Louis Tuesday.
j. N. Bishop has removed to his new resi-
dence.
DR.. Sam'l Lucas, Goodwater, called on us
last Saturday.
TIP. Fitz, Des Arc, was in town last week.
Mr.. Henry Cole was in Ironton last week.
MIR. Thomson and party of friends called
on us Saturday.
Mr.. W. G. Dilts will remove to st. Louis
the first of next month.
Miss Jet Aubuchon. Jefferson City, visited
the family of Capt. Zwart last week.
Mrs. T. c. Leech and daughter left for St.
Louis Sunday.
Mrs. Stoever and daughter, who were in
Ironton for several weeks, visiting Rev. D.
A. Wilson and wife, left for Philadelphia,
their home, last Monday on No. 604. Mrs.
Wilson accompanied them as far as St.Louis,
whence she goes to visit her son in North
Missouri,