Wichita eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1886-1890, 1887-12-25


The EyegIass.
There is a large number Of young men
in these free states whose chief object IN
life is TO be taken for Englsblmen.
The youth who wants TO pass as an
Englishman is obliged to put himself
through a long and tedious process Of
preparation He usually com mences with
a study of the English" method Of
speech The first task is to learn how TO
talk away down in the chest" and the
phrase chosen TO experiment upon is n,
variably, by Jove." When he can say
this with the proper accent he next ven
TIRES upon You don't say sou He then
passes on TO such sentences as How
awfully Jolly. | cawn't believe it. you
know, " and So on.
IF you live in the same house with him
you can hear him up to i late hour Of the
night repeating over and over such words
as .'dawnce,' "cawn't," ''Paw:h,n
'-chawnce." ''rathaw,'' ''fathaw and
Jaw" Sometimes he Will allow his
voice TO slide no while be says ''demmit."
The word that you Will hear him use
oftenest is lawfully" He will tell you
that the flower is lawfully nice" that the
policeman is lawfully kwosS" that his
tea is lawfully hot, " and that Belle Jones
is ''awfully jolly"
He would almost die for shcn;e should
he make such vulgar blunder rs to say
pants" The word he uses is trousers
tbreeches, or bags He Will tell you
confidentially, 81 pwefew to say bags; it's
awfully English; the best fellows all say
it. you know" In this way does the
young citizen proceed to Auglicizo him
self
But you can be English n more ways
than in speech. Dress oftener prOclaims
the American Englishman than anything
else. ANY afternoon about this time of
year YOU may see dozens of American
Englishmen on Fifth avenue or in the
neighborhood of the Hoffman house, the
Brunswick, or Fifth Avenue hotel. They
Rre pretty sure to be dressed in large pat
tern checks TO carry enormous canes, and
10 have their trousers turned up at the
legs. A pair of trousers turned up at the
legs is the most English sight that you
can see.
WITH TROUSERS TURNED Up.
know a young American Enghshman
who runs to the window every morning
on rising to see if he will have an oppOr-
tunity of turning his trousers legs up. N
the day looks fine he comes from the
window with a disappointed air and says,
''TOo bad, by Jove. 1t isn't going To
vain afteh all Once ne has become 3
thorough Englishman, however, he VIII
walk through Broadway the sunniest day
IN the year with his trousers turned uD
The walk of the American Englishman
is also very distinctive. Il Is not, strictly
speaking, a walk at all, but 4 stride
feat hoy trpll nd ho
are turned slightly in as if the walker
wore spurs The left arm is curved end
IS permitted to swing but very little
The cane is carried perpendicularly and
the point is brought upon the ground
almost three feet in front OF the walker
1t is not good form to throw the chest too
prominently forward, bur yOu VIII notice
graceful droop of the shoulders.
The single eye glass is nearly an abSo-
lutte necessity, and the American English
man uses it in public just rs soon as he
can get il into his eye without opening his
mouth. Several young gentlemen OF my
acquaintance have seriously injured their
eyes by using strong eye glasses when
their sight Was good. But injury 80 ones
eye is p small penalty 10 pay for such a
fashionable and attractive practice. by
iove, Chawley," said one young gentle
man, Il would wawthaw endangaw the
total sight of one eye than suwwendaw the
privilege of weaving the glass. o its
vewy English"
But the pillow of the young swell is not
without thorns, for his father is very often
blunt spoken, honest man whose gram
mar and pronunciation are none TOO good
IF fathaw would only altaw his speech
twltfe / would give half my allowance
He would nevyaw, nevyaw pass for an
Englishman. y This is the sad wall OF
many young gentleman in the city Of
New York and through this counxy-
George Salisbury in The Epoch.