West Virginia Democrat. [volume] (Charles Town, W. Va.) 1885-1890, 1887-04-29
WEST VIRGINIA DEMOCRAT, APRIL 30 1887.
DYSPEPS1A'S GRIP.
THE HOLD THE DISEASE HAS UPON
THE AVERAGE NEW YORKER.

Gothamite Throws Into his stomach.
An Attack OF Lunch House.
"Nost people have an idea that the reason
why there is so much dyspepsia in New York
is because there is something the matter with
the air in the city or tho Croton water, OF the
climate or something like that" said ON ex-
perienced physician who was approached by
areporter ON the subject. There may be
something in all that The climate Is pretty
irving for people Of weak constitutions, but
not more SO than the climates Of some other
countries where dyspepsia is as little known
as the ancient plague is hero. The real trouble
is that people don't take time to eat, and eat
in the wrong way. Many man thinks he IS
diving with consumption or heart disease, or
Bright's disease, or something like that, when
rs a matter Of fact nothing ais him except an
attack Of lunch house.
"Lunch hOusep
ayes, sir, lunch house Lunch houses make
more imaginary diseases than all other causes
together. Thousands Of men think they have
malaria in their system and rush away to the
mountains or take sea voyage, and fill their
bodies fun of quinine i; they can't do any
thing else, when all that ails them is the
lunch house. Lunch houses cause moro OF
what is called malaria in New York than all
the bad sewage, bad as that is. don't be-
heve there Is any more malaria around now
than there was thirty years ago, when there
wasn't an intelhgently constructed sewer IN
the United States. If people would only have
as much sense about eating as they had then
there wouldn't be any complaint about ma
laria or dyspepsia either.
TO show YOU what mean, go into any or
the big lunch houses down town about noon,
and what do you seel There is long coun-
ter on each side Of the room, and in front OF
each counter, perched on stools in nncomfort-
able, stoop shouldered positions, crowded in
together like herrings in box, is long limo
of men. They eat-no, gorge is better word
Us fast as they can.
@And what is it that they throw into their
stomachsl Pork and beans, clans, oyster
pies, beef Ia mode, fried potatoes, fried
ham and eggs, fried hash, fried cakes-grease,
spice, pepper and indigestible meat. On that
they pile hot mince pie with crust like sole
leather and pour over tho whole mass a cup OF
scalding coffee strong enough to raise the
dead. Then they just stop long enough to
light cigar, which will paralyze the action
OF the stomach on all this stuff, and bolt back
TO business with load under their shirt
fronts like lead The healthicSt man in the
world couldn't stand that sort of a strain very
long, il it were combined, as it always is in a
big city like New York, with confinement in
a close room, and very likely stopping posi-
ton over desk"
That's all true enough, but where does the
malaria come inF
snow, Just wait a minute; Pm coming to
that presently. The liver is the first organ in
the body that gives out under the terrific
strain. It gets tired and refuses to do its
work Pretty soon the man feels laSSitude
and a queer pain in his joints. Then he has
headaches and fevers, and gets so he doesn't
care rap whether he lives or dies. He puts
out his tongue one day before looking glass,
and il apparently coated half an inch
thick with yellow furze. That settles it. He
is perfectly sure he has got malaria. Like as
not he gets his plumber TO so all over tho
house and roll up q ruinous bill looking for
sewer gas. Very likely he wants TO sell tho
place and move out to Ringwood, or live in
balloon, while he keeps his head ringing for q
month at time with quinine. Then he be-
gins to read up on his symptoms in health
books, and pretty soon he is certain that his
heart is affected, or his liver is being con-
sumed, or there are indubitable evidences OF
paresis about him. The chances are, if he
isn't rescued and taken out Of the terrible in
fluences OF that lunch house he will get to be
a hypochondriac and health crank Of the
most intolerable sort, and will so around
drinking hot water and reading lectures to
his friends on the advantages Of salt packs and>
steaming foot baths and liver pads. He will
get more crazy notions about hours of getting
up and going TO bed and such things than you
can count in a week, and he viii lead his
family life that will make them think Of
suicide with satisfaction About that time
the lunch house is having its perfect work.
"The whole fashion OF midday eating in
New York ought TO be reformed. If men will
persist in making their business hours so long
that they have to interrupt them to eat, they
should take at least an hour to it. They
should 90 70 some quiet resort and sit down
at a table like Christians, with some friends,
with whom they can chat and talk. Then let
them eat very light lunch--a small chop,
say, with piece Of dry bread or something Of
that sort, giving themselves plenty of time to
maStisate and going away trifle hungry. A
piece Of dry bread and an apple, or zweibach
and q bunch of grapes is the best kind of a
lunch for dyspeptics. Let them abjure all
made dishes, grease, gravy, pie and spice, and
dSink nothing but light wines or water, and
t0ere won't be any malaria to speak of in this
climate. But if the present state of things
goes ON much LONGER the next generation will
not only be q race of dyspeptics-we'ro that
already-but a race OF thin cheSted, round
shoulderci, nervous, irascible and weak
hvered crankS.
"Of course the lunch house keepers are not
to blame. They have to offer what they can
sell No doubt they would rather set forth
food that people can digest if they had any
choice in the matter. It's the bad taste Of
their customers that makes the trouble
d.