Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01
woMEN AS rALkERs.
Sensible Advice the Secret OF the Art -
Conversation.

| Sensible Advice Oh, the Secret OF the ART -
| Conversation.
In spite of the reputation that women,
as sex. enjoy of being great takers.
comparatively few of them cultivate to
any decided degree the art of CONVEX
sation. They are apt to become so ac-
customed to their daily HOUSEHOLD life as
! to consider it the whole, not part. OF
| their existence, and they lose, as it
were, their own identity and merge
themselves into a housekeeper, or
nurse, without any individuality of their
own remaining. By many the fine arts
of which they have previously made
themselves masters are neglected and
gradually fall into ignoble disuss.
| Why is it that so many as soon as they
begin their married life discard their
music or singing and never bestow
| thought upon those accomplishments
which soothe and elevate US and seem
to rest spirit fretted by the ceaseless
turmoil of lifeP 1t is on this account
that some women are apt to be tire
| some when talking, for they rarely al
low the stream of conversation to rise
above its allotted banks of the common
place. If the subjects be children,
servants or dress the feminine tongues
wag glibly, but turn the current aside
from the well-worn channel and we
soon perceive there are rocks in the
course that disturb the smooth, pleasant
flow. 1t is impossible for one to be in
teresting in conversation who wishes to
see in the minds of others mere re-
Election of their own; whose aim is. not
to evolve some new idea or open fresh
avenues of thought, but to present
constant repetition of nothing.
OF course it i not to'be denied that
woman's proper sphere is her home:
that the better she performs her duties
to her family and friends the truer is
she to her vocation in life. But it
ought not to follow as a matter of
course that because a woman is a good
wife and mother that her whole con-
versation should SAVIOR of the meat that
forms her daily diet. Women are apt
to talk ''shop," and the shop generally
consists of their domestic concerns. AS
consequence there are a great many
needless bores in the world; needless, I
say, because unless there were some we
could not appreciate persons who are
really entertaining. Of the different
specimens of the genus ''bore" there
is none more distinctly marked than
the woman who imagines she is elo-
quent. The small animals of the same
kind, even the inevitable and long
winded gossip, pale into insignificance
beside her. She is generally known as
dealing largely in the flowers of rhet-
ORIG, lavishing metaphor and smile
with a prodigal hand, Astounding in
quotations and having a glowing look
in the eyes, as if she wished to be con-
sidered the inspired Pythia of Apollo's
temple, or a bareback rider on the
winged Pegasus. For good, old
fashioned, death-dealing, wound-up-
ACKNOWLEDGMENT and don't-stop-on-
Sunday bore, commend me to the
woman who tries to be eloquent in or
binary conversation. Like the ancient
Miriam, she ''holds you with her gilt
from the ordeal.
Next to the feminine Demosthenes
comes the gossip who knows more
about other peoples affairs than they
do themselves. There is not n skele-
ton hidden in a family closet but it is
raked out and held up in the glazing
light of publicity and exposed to the
gaze of thousands of inquiring eyes.
What woman should aim at in con-
versation is not only to entertain by
giving her own thoughts, but at the |
same time TO draw out those of others, |
especially the bashful and particularly |
no fnl Nnfninor ,a1aacac
SO much, nothing gives him such an
idea of his superiority, as TO allow him
an opportunity of imparting informa-
ton, though he may not have penetra
ton enough to discern that it is the
tact of the woman that entices him into
talking about what perhaps he knows
less than she. / remember hearing it
remarked of Mrs. Cleveland that she
was a charming conversationalist be-
cause she always chose topics which
she knew would interest others, and
in this lies the whole secret of the art
of cOnyersing. A celebrated French
woman, who had neither wealth, beauty
nor position to elevate her in social
circles, rose TO the highest rank among
the court during the latter day of
royalty simply by her art of pleasing in
her conversation. Brilliancy in con-
versation is not the essential character
istic. Some of the most charming
takers are any thing but witty or
learned; but the truth is we love to
hear those speak who really feel what
they say, whose words are choice with
out being studied and natural and easy
without being childish or slangy- We :
love to listen to those whose minds,
whose nobility of character, whose :
purity of soul shine in their converse
ton, and we feel that words are but