The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1887-06-22

Ii Is Dut g Slcp-On
Down TO the dep-oh.
The way is quite steep-oh
That leads to the decp-oh.
slipped on a grape-oh
Just by the day-poh.
In store near the dee-pot
bought this small teapot
Perhaps, to end the agitation,
Wed better henceforth call it station.
1t is claimed by some medical men that
smoking wcakcns the eyesigkt Maybe it
does. but just see how it strengthens the
| breath
The man who intends to camp out next
month should begin to prepare for it by
sleeping in the back yard and eating raw
meats.
Fricnd-Iou don't mean to say that you
understand French, Tommy? Tommy-O
cs. do: for when pa and ma speak French
st tea | know I'm to have powder.
What pains father more than the cry
Of his infant child" asks some one. We
! don't know, unless it is the cry Of his in
fant twins
y recent article is entitled "a Poet on an
Editor We cannot exactly understand
this. but perhaps he grabbed him while his
| back was turned.
Il IS now stated that George Washington
used 20 go fishing occasionally. This en-
tircly ursets the assertion that he couldn't
tel a lie.
\ celebrated physician boasting al dinner
that be cured his own hams, a guest ob
served, Doctor, | am glad to hear that
you have cured something
The newspaper astronomer VINO says that
there are Only four thousand stars visible TO
the naked eye has never tried roller skating
on the back of his head.
The richest man in Oregon began bust
ness by tanning calf skins, says en- eN
charge This is the first time we ever
heard of Q school-teacher getting rich.
The following toast was pronounced at a
tirc;nen'S dinner, and was received with
great applause The ladies-their eyes
kindle the only flame against which there
is no insurance.
At Washington every one takes his after
neon Walk on the avenue as religiously as
he GOES 10 church on Sunday, and actuated
largely 10y the same motive-to see other
people.
Says 4 philosopher, No thoroughly oc-
cuo;ed man was ever miserable" Probably
this philosopher never spent forenoon
among his friends trying to borrow five
dollar note.
Western horses are not so hardy nor so
serviccabie as Canadian horses, owing to
the general use in the West of corn instead
Of oats and peas which are fed to horses in
CaDaG:..
\ correspondent asks if the sharps in
music DO not virtually include the flats.
We don't know how it is in music, but
in the Hnmusical turmoil of everyday life
the Sharps always take in the flats
Don't spend your money for motto of
Save my lambs. until you have cleaned
out your back yard and disinfected the
vauls and sewers. Cholera doesn't care
continental for mottoes.
Prof. Proctor says that without water
there car be no Volcano That (hic)
may be So sad old Bcasly; ''and without
whisky there (hicl would be fewer crup-
| t;oDS-at home.
They Gida' pick that stuff soon enough,
did thy, mammal" asked little boy as he
passed Il grocery where several cakes of
LimbuT9cr were taking breathing spell
outside
MIS-. l.. II. Mccall, Of Mollard Creek. y.
G.. has recently given birth TO her third
pair Of twins. She has been married IA
years ard in tits time. has presented her
| husband with IS children, OF whom II still
1--we.
Mrs Bascom says she does not see what
they want to make so much fuss about
whether prominent Americans have coats
of-arms or not She says if it was coats
without arms it would be something to talk
about;
Il say, boss. groaned an old darkey
Who had broken his leg, and was being
| bundled rather unceremoniouSly into an
ambulance ''yo' may not b'lieve it, but it
! hurts 4 cullGd man jess as much ter git his
| leg broke as il do q white EiGn
Have stove plate, a thick one, rivetcd
in my hat he said sadly to the tinsmith.
and have this jacket lined with sheet-iron,
doubie thickness in the back, and put"
| Crest Scott, MIR. 8, have you gone
crazy NO: I'm to umpire game of
base bali tomorrow. I'm going to make
my viii now.
Nov, you tell ne have Il fair memory,
I great capacity for learning languages. a
large bump Of generation, and a we'll de-
veio?cd head generally" You have,
said the phrenoloeist. is there anything,
asked the man under examination, in the
cylGera2ce Of his Joy, that my head needs
10 make it absolutely perfect" Yes.
What is it, play Washing
20 IN OLD DRESS COAT.
look at thee dolcfully, dear Old dress coat,
For numbered fear, are thy days
Or rather ny nights-and no more canst
thou float
Ca waves Of tic WALKERS wild maze.
The prcsScr's best Skill cannot make thee
appear
j newly bought garment again.
50 here's for our foIl;cS smile, and a tear
For hours TOO bright far to remain.
. g.