Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-05-21

grees OF gravity. one OF the four police commits
Soners, whose Offices are on the floor below sits
In Judgment on the offenders. II IL happens TO
be courtly Fitz John Porters day TO try cases or
mild little Commissioner McClaves, or Commits
sloner N0orhis, the offender congratulates him.
self, but IL Commissioner French the president OF
the board OF police, takes the bench the most CAL
loused officer trembles In his boots in way that
would please the "toughs1 OF his precinct II they
were allowed to see IL.
Commissioner French looks like the pictures Ca
0orfau draws OF the stern, griZZled keen-eyed pre-
feet OF police. His sharp black eyes appear all the
darker In contrast with his long. gray mustache.
His brOnZed face free OF all wrinkles his thin
lips furnish any index the offend er OF his opin-
Ions. A man with formidable blonde mustache
arises at signal from the commissioner and reads
SO rapidly that no one unaccuSt omed TO him can
understand what he says the charges against n
policeman The latter and the witnesses in the
sleeve. midway between the hand and the elbow.
bands or blue braid, which indicate his term OF
service, every i've years adding a new bar 10 his
sleeve. Up TO certain point the officer takes
pride In these blue bars, but when four or more OF
them have encircled his sleeve and he hasn't been
able TO exchange them for the gold braid that In
dicate the officer they become source OF annoy
ance. The clerk with the big blonde mustache.
who sits beside the commissioner Is often able 10
tell why the blue bars have not been exchanged
for the gold. He is the record clelk and he keeps
In his relentless fashion the history OF every po-
llcemanS shortcomings. digest OF the record is
entered on the back OF the charge against each
man.
CHORUS OF oArns.
When the charges have been read the commits
sioner In quick, imperious voice orders the ofIen-
der and all witnesses TO stand up and take the
Bible. They cluster about a small well-worn
Bible, to which each clings With his right hand.
Sometimes dOzep witnesses are thus cling TO the
sacred book. The commissioner administers the
oath. When citizens appear as witnesses an aver
age OF one In twenty refuse 10 be sworn and stand
apart from the group around the Bible. After the
rest have taken the oath the witness makes his
Affirmation The chief witness for the prosecution
IS usually an officer OF the precinct from which
=, Wanda he f-Sin Ia
CURLY: care these charges truce" and being an
swered in the Affirmative he says: "Tel us what you
know about the case" The officer makes his state
| ment In q matter-of-fact way, and the commits
| stoner then says: "What have you TO say Tor
yoursel1?" The policeman is allowed to make
full and free statement. He may have lawyer
| IL he SO elects, but he seldom INDUCES In That
| luxury. The commOnest cause OF complaint IL
absence from post. The stereotyped excuse OF tie
offender is II was SICK your honor, had been TAX
Ing medicine and stepped into saloon 10 SIT down
| a moment" The record clerk, who has heard this
excuse twenty times or more ever "Wednesday,
| smiles, but the commissioners black eyes fairly
| pierce the offender as he says Why didn't you
report sick and go home?n The offender makes es
commissioners eyes he is pretty sure 10 en-
| tangle himself in the meshes or the case. The
| commissioner suddenly eNclaims: CLOSED. makes
an entry In his book and the offender goes away In
state OF suspense. lie viii not know his tate IN
i til after the commissioner and his three colleagues
| who meet Tuesdays and Fridays, have considered
| and passed upon the case from the evidence ad.
duced at the trial on "Wednesday. he may be lined
| nOunce to him the terrible verdict that he must
hand over his club and badge and retire from the
| service to private life The latter punishment,
however, Is seldom inflicted.
cHRGNIc OFFENDER.
One remarkably self-posSessed policeman ex.
plains his absence from post by giving his move.
ments through a labyrinth OF streets while the
roundsman was looking for him. There are more
| than 600 miles OF streets In New York. but the
| commissioner knows every one OF them, and M
allows the defendant TO tell his ingenious stor!
bSc Sha,l inp nDp
| clustvely that a snail could have traverSed Thu
| route I'm the time that the ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS e
sioner says: .'Your record is bad You have beer
. tried seven times for absence from post during
your four years service on the force and you have
q told the same story each time. You ought 10 In
n | vent a new excuse. Case cioSed.' The Offender
goes away feeling pretty sure that If he gets on
q With twenty days ine after such speech IRON
9 the commissioner he will be fortunate.
ssYou failed 10 report at roll call; what eXcuSe
: have you to offer?" demands the commissioner o.
beside the Stalwart officer says: 81 am his land.
/ lady and forgot TO call him up In the morning.
severe lecture and tells the officer: 'You may go,
3 which means, 81 Will not line you this time"
o+iiciai or the post-offce with whom he has had
political quarrel hard names, Is arraigned, and
letter carrier who rattles on his Testimony In the
stilted studied tones OF an amateur tragedian les
tines and supplements his words with: 'Such Ian
guage panied me very much and
''Oh, this is the merest bosh,' says the commits,
little except to deny the charge, but his manly
face and positive manner contraSted with the ef-
fuSive conduct OF the complainant nave won the
} case for him.
THE DEsPor OF THE DETECTIVES
None of the fifty detectives on the New York
force are ever formally tried. Their destiny de-
ponds on one man, and he is Inspector Byrnes, a
man nattfly dressed In a striped business suit who
Sits in an inner room at Police Headquarters,
reached by a confusing labyrinth OF passages
guarded by uniformed supernumerar1eS The
but experts and criminals Will admit that the
French VidoeQ does not equal the Keen detecuve
| OF the New York force. When the funeral OF Grant
took place thieves from all over America came TO
New York. They were spotted by detectives on
incoming trans who allowed them 70 land In New
York and then arrested them. As many as seven-
teen In a herd were arrested and locked up at one
time and the cells OF city prisons We're Iull OF
thieves. A million strangers were in the city, but
| the only act OF theft reported during the obSe-
quies was the robbery OF an old German in a re-
mote part OF the city, who lost cheap silver
watch.
At O'Clock in the morning the fifty detectives,
motley throng representing al naIfonanIes,
who work In the aristocratc parts OF the city, are
fashiOnably dressed, and Others, who explore the
One is a Bohemian another an Italian, and an
other q Hebrew. They make their reports TO the
he Is pretty apt to md that somebody's eyes have
| been on him and that the inspector knows about
his movements. The inspector Is the court 70 try
his case and no outsider hears IL. he may be repr-
manded or quietly dropped from the force, but
there is no appeal from the inspectors decision.
When a new detective Is needed patrolman is
sometimes battered with an Invitation 10 put on
citizens clothes and report 10 the inspector. He
may have been paLrolllng a fOrlOrn beat In the
outskirts OF the city, but the inspector, who
watches the record or every promising policeman,
has heard OF his making clever arrest, aud wants
to give him trial. The inspector has MS tru1sInS
one of which Is that man who is TO make good
detective will show something OF his fitness In his
face and another being that he must first possess
| q great ambition TO be q detective. Ambition is
the mainsprfng and SecretiveneSs and perseyer-
ance the balance OF a good detective The in
| spector has also tradition that no woman makes
a good detective. .They are too apt 10 fall In
love- he says, "and a woman In love Will tell all
she knows. sometimes have TO employ q woman,
but tell her more about the case than Is absO-
lutely necessary"
| AMOS j. CUNNING.
| RETURNING POLITICIANS WHO KNOW IT ALL
The politicians are returning to town from
Albany and Washington, and the cafes and bar
rooms are crowded at all hours OF the day and
night by little groups OF emphatic takers. The
emphasis of the average politician Is his distin-
QushinR characteristic. Theatrical men, when
they get into o discussion In public place are
ant to bang their fists, wag their heads and pound
the bar up TO certain period but after thai they
fall into q pla1nt1ve state Of mind and appeal TO
their friends for support In their argumeuts
Groups OF brokers are invariably pervaded with
all air and their talk is not so suggestive
as their wtnks, gestures and noos. But
when q local Congressman, Assenblyman