The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-08-15
MARK TwAIN's REFERENCES.
The Way He Broke His Father-in-Law
All Up.


New YORK, Aug 13.-Mark Twain is in
New York almost every week He is very
much at home in the city, though, singu-
larly enough, he never stops twice at the
same hotel, that is, not twice consecutively.
This is because he likes variety. It has
nothing to do with the bill or his methods
of payment Mark is all right though
every now and then some old crouy from
the West who hasn't struck pay dirt since
49 will turn up with queer story about
the great humorist and his days of impecu-
mostly. Little do these detractors know
that Mark was called upon very suddenly
Que day to furnish Californian testimonials
to his good character, and that he passed
through the ordeal in fashion that should
silence all carpipg criticism. The story was
somewhat thus:
AS everyone knows, Mr. Clemens first met
his beautiful wife while on the famous voy-
age of the Quaker City, and he pursued his
acquaintance after their return so closely
that at last the young lady's papa one day
called the ardent and devoted Mark into his
private study and said, after some pre-
amble:
Mr.. Clemens, have something to say to
you which bears upon a subject of grave
Importance, at least to me and mine. You
have been coming here for some time and
your manners leave no doubt in my mind as
to your object. Now, my daughters wei
fare is very dear to me, and before | can ad-
nit you to her society on the footing of a
sutton to her hand would like to know some
thing more than | do about your antece-
dents, &c. Stop minute? You must re-
member that a man may be good fellow
and pleasant companion ON a voyage and
all that, but when it is question as grave as
this wise father tries to take every precau-
ton before allowing his daughters affections
to become engaged, and ask of you, as a
gentleman, that you shall give me the
names OF some of your friends in California
to whon'I may write and make such lnqui-
ries as l deem necessary, if you still de-
sire our friendship"
1t was now Mark Twain's turn
Sir, !" said he, bowling profoundly, as be-
c",ne young man who respects his hoped
fG:' father in-law our sentiments are
very correct. / approve of them my
self, and hasten to add that you have not
been mistaken in my sentiments towards
your daughter, whom | may tell you can
dldly seems to me to be the most perfect of
her sex, and honor your solicitation for
her welfare. l am not only perfectly will
ing to give you reference but am only too
glad to have an opportunity to do so, which
my natural modesty would have prevented
me from offering. Therefore, permit me to
give you the names of few of my friends.
will write them down. First is Lieut..
Gen. John McComb, Alexander Badlam,
ten. Lander and Col. w. n. L. Barnes.
They will all lie for me just as l would for
them under like circumstances
The conclusion broke the old man all up,
ana he never asked more reference nor
wrote to those gentlemen. Those who know
TINS quartette will appreciate the joke.
few weeks before Mark Twain started
away on the trip mentioned above he was
standing on Montgomery street, leaning up
against a lamp post, and he held q cigar box
under one arm. Mrs. Capt. Edward Poole,
very beautiful woman, and as bright and
as witty as beautiful, came along and
stopped and held out her hand saying:
why, Mark, where are you going in such
hurryF' I'm m-o-o-v-ing." drawlcd
Mark, at the same time opening the cigar
box, disclosing "a pair of blue socks, pipe
and two paper collars.
Mark Twain never was much of ladies'
man, and he always appeared like fish out
u water when he happened TO be near them.
a good story is told of a visit he for some
reason had to make to alady since known as
a very fine painter and writer, though then
sue was only society lady" and her pow
ers We're yet untried. There were several
young ladies visiting there from Napa,
and they took the occasion to have
some dressnaking done, and they
mad obtained a wax lay figure to
Try the dresses on The afternoon was
rainy and the girls had all been at work, not
expecting visitors and they had dressed the
hgure in Mrs BIS clothes and then went
cut Of the dining room to tea. In the mean
une Mark rang the bell and was admitted,
and while waiting he sauntered to the open
qoors of the back parlor and there saw Mrs.
b. as he supposed. and he made as good
bow as nc could, which is not saying
much, and said: Good afternoon"
NO answer He cleared his throat and
advanced few steps, saying:
!, Ahem! / remarked, Mrs. B, that
that-it is raining
Still no answer, and flushing, he stuck
Doth hands far down in his pockets, and
gong few steps nearer said:
1t is pleasant day, Mrs. B. Icame
up from the Alta Office to--oh, pshaww be
exclaimed, as he discovered his mistake,
ahd the fact that three or four girls were
standing in the other door behind the real
Mrs. b nearly strangled with suppressed
lie managed to deliver his message, but
nothing would induce him TO stay, and he
went away giving the miserable figure a
HasleVolent look as he went
Betsy O'DowD.