The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-07-16
MISCELLANEOUS.

The sleepiest man will wake up II
you say ball game in his ear.
The best place to see the average
museum freak is in the picture in tha
advertisement. 1t there excels itself in
monstrosity. - Germantown I'sdepend-
ent.
-Gisls are so scarce in Dakota that
when new girls enters the territory
all the brass bands turn out en- masse
and serenade her with Sweet Vioiets. y"
-MiSanthropic Exchange.
"A Chicago man bought $3.50 in
cubator, put $25 worth of eggs in it,
and Matched out bluebottle fly. He
now brags of having the only 5000 blue
bottle fly in the country. Cincinnati
Times.
First Low Comedy-"I like this
road much better than the B. & O.,
Claudius." Tragedy-"Why so, Hora-
top" First Low Comedy-''All the
ties are planned on the upper side?'-
Puck.
why don't you mend your
clothes?" asked a gentleman of very
weather-beaten tramp. Coos" was
the reply, 1--WE got it from the Scripter
that it don't pay to sew tears. Wash
tngton Critic.
The annual product of butter in the
State of Vermont is stated at p, 900, 900
pounds; of maple sugar at 10000, 200
pounds; of wool at 100000 pounds,
and of hay at 100000 tons.-Farm,
Field and Stockman.
Good buttermilk made from sweet
cream and taken fresh is form of food
found serviceable in cases of diabetes.
A diet of pure buckwheat -four cakes
has also proved advantageous in gly-
cosuria. indianapolis Journal.
"A man in the western part of Ne
braska, who has been bound up in
wedlock only five months, has APP
piled for a divorce upon the singular
charge that his wife will not trim her
toenails, which he AYERS are of mon
strous size.-DetrOH Free Press.
The way they talk out West. First
Speaker-"Let me see, Uncle Billy,
you're the oldest inhabitant in Yeast
vile, amt yep Second ditto-''Me
the oldest inhabitant? o, no. What
put that idea in your head? There's
old Ferguson who's been here five or
six months longer than me-"
"A Dubuque grocer named Scott
offered to let woman named Taylor
strike him with Goldfish for twenty
five cents. 1t was all joke, you know,
but she paid the money, gave the cod
fish whirl or two, and when it hit
grocer Scott it broke his jaw and tore
off part of his ear.
In entering horse car it is not re-
allied by everybody that to occupy the
rear end of the car while there is plenty
of room ahead is needless injury to
the horses. When the weight behind is
greater than that in the front of the car
it makes drawing the load much harder
for the horses.
Growing Too Fast.-A man with a
large family was complaining of the
difficulty of supporting all of them.
''But," said friend, you have sons
big enough to earn something for you
now. The difficulty is they are toe
big to work." was the disconsolate
fathers reply.-N. Y Ledger.
Some Mexicans were caught rob.
bling q freight car on a siding of the
Mexican Central few days ago, and
the station agent telegraphed to head.
quarters as to how to proceed. The re.
ply was-''Prosecute vigorously" He
replied to this with, Cant do it in this
case, as they have been executed, but
will do so in the next. Wall Street
NeUS.
AT a grand dinner a very needless
gentleman, who talked a great deal,
forgot that his neighbor, young lady,
was unusually tall, and exclaimed: 81
do not like big women!" The lady bit
her lip; and the speaker, seeing he had
made a blunder, and trying to repair it
as gallantly as possible, added: when
they are young, madam Haven
NeUS.
Veal Scollops: Chop any refuse
pieces of veal very fine. put layer on
the bottom of deep, buttered baking
dish. Season with salt and pepper.
Cover with a layer of powdered
crackers and bits of butter. Proceed
until the dish is full. Spread over the
top thick layer of crackers pounded,
butter, two beaten eggs, and teacup
of cream. Bake slowly.-LouisUille
COurierJou17saI.
Minneapolis thinks that it has the
fastest typesetter in the country. His
name is Min and he came from Sioux
City. He is known as the missouri
River Rusher," but his experience, un.
til very recently, was confined wholly
to country newspapers. He was put
on case and worked seven successive
nights, FASTING up a string of 101, DOC
ems. This is an average of IA, 42S ems
per night The work was on straight
matter. He can set 1000 ems per hDur
with comparative ease.
Composition of Rails.