The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1887-11-17
THE LITTLE ONES.

Freaks and Fancies, New and Old, wise
and Otherwise, Of Our Smaller Selves.
It was at Sunday-school exhibition, and
the superintendent was showing of the
| results of his labors. During the exercises
he asked the children who could tell him
| anything about Peter. No one answered.
| The question was repeated several times, till
finally little girl held up her hand. We'll,
my de,r," said the Superintendent, that's
sm Sd ss 70 Sc ass snsrs sov, S ons ans s rs
to shame" The little girl came forward to
the platform and was told to tell the audi
ence what she knew of Peter. She put her
finger in her mouth, and, looking very
smiling, said:
Peter, Peter, pumpkin eater,
Had wife and couldn't keep her;
Put her in pumpkin SHE'LL
And there he kept her very well.
Amid the roar that followed she hurried
gayly to her seat.
A little three-year-old Chicago girl and
her grandmother were walking on Madison
man hobbling along on crutches.
Grandma" said the little girl, "what a
fnnny-lootins mani What's the matter
"That poor man has only one Leg" replied
thf Fla sd ts hs Sds is sv SsPp1s P1pos ,vmn.tbzn,v
and thoughtfully at him, and for few mo-
ments the child said nothing. Then, having
apparently formed some kind of theory as
to the cause of the poor mans deformity,
"Grandma, what is God doing with his
other leg?"
Street scene: Three small boys, one ma
nipulating Q long stick of molasses candy by
inserting Il into his OBS phagus and bringing
1t to view again.
Second Small Boy-Say, Johnny, give me
apiece.
Third Small Boy-Say, Johnny, I didn't
'Well, I seed you didn't want any"
A young financier, aged four, who was
small trap, finally asked leave to spend the
proceeds. The nurse was told to 60 wherever
he led her, to see what he proposed buying.
He passed all the toy and candy shops, but
paused before hardware store, and pointing
TO the window exclaimed triumphantly, II
buy more mouse trap, FannyW
A little four-year-old chubby faced boy sat
clenching his fingers around silver dollar
at the Sunday school service at the Methodist
Episcopal Church in Tyrone, Pa, on Sum
day, and later reluctantly surrendered it to
q person who collected the contributions to
the church fund, saying afterward: II
didn't want to give it to Mr.. B.; 1 wanted
to give it to the Lord"
II saw Mrs. B. to-day, paps, and took
off my hat and bowed to her very politely"
"rm very glad TO hear that. Where did
you learn to bow so nicelyP" asked the fond
father, blissfully anticipating that he had
himself been the model.
II saw the hand-oIgan monkey do II" was
the prompt reply.
Jack (after closely scrutinizing his cry
ing baby brothereDo babies 60 to Heaven,
mamma?
Mamma-Yes, dear; when they die. What
makes you ask?
Jack-Oh, nothin'. feel sorry for the
angels and fings, don't you, mamma?
Little Rob-Mamma, should say pants or
trousers?
Manufacturers, my boy. Pants is
vulgar.
Rob-Well. mamma, you ought to give
our dog some water; he trousers aIfAl
Mother Ito four-year-oldeIf your dolly
has been as naughty as you say, Flossie,
why don't you give her good whipping?
Flossie thoughtfully) Cause / don't
b'lieve in that sort of thing.
"You must not do that, my DEAR" said
mother to her four-year-old daughter. Mice
little girls never do So" "Yes they do,
mamma, sometimes; didn't you just see me
do IT." was the bright retort.
A little boy whose sprained wrist had been
relieved by bathing in whiskey surprised his
mother by asking: did papa ever sprain
his throat when he was little boy"