The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-11-30
SILENCE Is GOLDEN.
Mn. Henry Ward Bssohsrs Lecture to Talk
alive Mem and Women,
BridIing the Tongue More Efec-
tive in Argument Than siIence-Valu-
able Points for Wives.
Written Especially for the Sentinel.
Copyrighted, 1879

INSTRUCTION can parents DeSbOW upon buelr
children than from their earliest years TO
teach them how wise q thing it is to bride
the tongue. But the most efficient and
Lasting teaching of this doctrine will be
that which the children gather from their
parents personal example. IL that, more
than words, Is of a character to convince
them that their parents believe in, and
consclentiously endeavor to practice them
selves the lessons they attempt to teach,
we may be sure the children will be quick
70 recognize il and eager to initiate.
Nothing is sweeter than the true social
intercourse and the friendly or the family
circle would be dull and most un-
satisfactory II not enlivened and
cheered with frequent and cheer
full conversatson ali through the day or
week. But, however much freedom and
affectionate confidence there may be
among friends, or in the relations OF
home, even there it is not wise or safe to
leave the tongue wholly unbrldled.
The 'word spoken in season, ho v good 1t
Is" But even with our best and dearest,
now and then, every. day, there are occa-
sions when the power Of silence is far more
10 be depended upon, and is infinitely
more eficacious than the most royal gifts
Df eloquence. We have seen cases-and
more particularly among the Young-Fhea
what seemed to be an ungovernaoie out
break of passion has been quelled by per-
iectly calm silence. Not one word of re-
ply has often-like oil On the troubled
waters-laid tc rest the perturbsd spirit,
and brought sn- ues and peace where but
for this sovereign remedy.
Few are so perfect that some distur-
bance will not occasionally arise that
tends toward dispute. Even an argu-
ment may become so heated that 1t leads
close on to a dispute. Although the defin-
itions of argument and dispute" as
given by the authorities, are almost syn
Dnymous, yet l. always seems that dis
puies border lore closely onto irritation
or anger than arguments do. Az any
rate, the powder magazine is 50 near to
both that holding lNck reply-although
the hardest-is mach the wisest way.
There are times, which every one has
probably known, when even "a soft an
swer" has not hall the power of perfect
silence.
With the ignorant and passionate it is
not only useless but the widest folly to
argue or dispute. Was Solomon, with all
his wisdom, in the most trustworthy state
of mind aud Judgment when he advised to
t'answer fool according to his folly?" Is
gifted with great self control, sensible Deo-
pie may dispute or disagree on many
points Of interest, and yet not forget the
laws OF kindness and good sense but none
can "snswer fool according 10 his folly"
without descending 10 his level"
In the household many things demand
ing forbearance and great stock Of pa
thence are springing up constantly. In
large families particularly, hardly an hour
passes even when all endeaYor to be
guided by the laws OF love and kindness,
that little clouds do not appear in the DIS
lance, shadows pass over the horizon
which, by trifing irritation or mistake,
would soon gather in black Clouds threat
ening a violent storm. But by silence,
s'setting q watch over the door Of the
Il. rk. Leo
no trace behind.
None more than the wife need to have
zhe full possession of the browning grace
of silence and the ability to know instinct
lively when to hold her peace-even from
words of greeting or endearment. Men
are 20 entirely different in this respect
that, while loving strongly and faithfully,
they are not so dependent on the daily
outward expression of affection as woman.
With her
Love will die II It is not fed,
And the true heart cries for its daily bread"
With men word of endearment asmile
or a caress are all pleasant enough row and
then; yet these little weaknesses are not
necessary to q mans comfort or happiness.
But loving wife can dispense with food
and rest and think it no hardship, il by 50
doing for a time-forgetting her own
bodily needs-she secures the time to cater
for the taste, or minister to the comforts
attentions, especially from the one
loved par excellence, she cannot dispense
with without suffering anu loss.
They are her life With them her
nature expands, broadens, grows richer
and nobler; without them she withers and
becomes Impoverished. Many husbands
little understand how quickly their wives
may deteriorate or become mere cold ma
chimes, IL they pass heedlessly on their
way, forgetting the heaTt-famihe they
leave at home.
But no matter how much a woman may
crave gentle attention and loving notice,
ii wise she will teach herself TO under
stand the great power she may earn by
aience-not grim, unamiable silence-but
that which gently, unostsntatiously tends
70 peace. Its patient continuance will
often enlighten the eyes which have been
nnconsciously holden.to the unintentional
neglect which has, perhaps, left shadows
on the home life, and once recognized
they will love and honor the wife
all the more for the quiet lesson she has
taught by her silence. There are times In
mems lives far more than in women's
when any reply to hasty or careless re-
marks or complaints, however lust OF in
attention or supposed neglect, would be
most untimely, and, perhaps, cause Sc
1fous trouble.
A woman In comfortable health natur-
ally rises IN the morning In cheerful,
happy frame of mind, inclined TO spright-
Jy conversation, and were her husband
able to be equally so, could in those few
moments OF morning converse and greet
Ing drink in enough nectar to make her
eyes bright and her step elastic all day
long. But a life OF business or public du-
tics Is seldom conductive to a good nights
rest, or cheerful, happy waking.
Unfortunately, however, 1t often hap.
pens that the short time devoted TO waking
apd dressing are the very moments when a
wise woman will hold her peace, content
10 know that kindly attentions and pleas
ant words have more power, and are better
appreciated after hot steak or chop and
n good cup OF coffee, than before,
This state OF things does not strike one
especially a womAn-as exactly lust. But
here are the facts which in many families
are so common that one cannot gainsay or
resist them. Can a change be effected by
constant repining2 VIII a long, sad face
make the delinquent more thoughtful7
Will II not enhance the evil and tend to
change occasional carelessness into settled
dndiherance9 Worse still, by q habit OF
complaining, perhads reproachlng, does
not vile endanger her own lover While
that shines undiminished there Is always
hope that the love Of peace and promise"