davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-25
Don't Believe In 1t.


'Do you believe in corporea1 punishment"
asked an Arkansas school board of an applicant
for a position teacher of q rural school
* do b'leeve in whata"
Gin corporal punishment"
'No. DON'T" was tho reply. 81 don't bleeve
in none o. these fancy new kind o. punishments.
Gimme a keen willer CAD, or q good timber
hickry club, an you can 60 to grass with your
corpral kind o. punishments."
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-25
I'm No. Be Done, Though.

philadelphia Record.
A Southern paper. one of the editors of which is
the author of Maryland. My Maryland, suggest
that on Charles Summers birthday the South
shall send all it's captured flags North to the
soldiers from whom they were taken. Tho
nroposition, and the day selected to carry it into
execution, are calculated to take all the color
out Of the bloody shirt
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-25
Will Die an Old Maid.
Boston Journal.


my DEAR" said fond papa to his daughter.
"why don't you get married." 81 will, papa"
replied the young lady, 'as soon as come across
q gentleman who doesn't drink, smoke, nor
play billiards, and who goes to church regular
Iy;" land, my good child. solemnly replied the
old man. you are but stranger here, Heaven
is your home.r
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-25
Lucky There Were No Turtles.

Trade Review.
'What a shell-like ear you've got, Miss Smith. !"
he said, they sat IN the sand at Coney island.
And Miss Smith looked up and down the wave
washed shore, and far as the eve could reach.
she saw nothing but clam and oyster shells.
They returned to New York without waiting
to see the fireworks.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-25
Social Amenities.
Tid-Bits.

First Colored Dame-Yo' is pore yaller trash;
pore yaller trash wifi freckles.
Second Colored Dame-l may be yaller, an ]
may has freckles, but de holler OBJ my foot dom
make no hole in de groun like what yours do.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-25
The Ruling Passion
New York Sun.

"My dear" said a husband, gently rousing
his wife-the lady dangerously ill-"Mrs.
DeHobson called a little while ago and left her
love and sympathy for you She seemed deeply
affected"
John" said the sick lady in a very weak tone
of voice, as she slowly Enclosed her eyes, what
did she have onl'
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-25
Penftentiary for Reform.

New York Sun.
Visitor ito convict)-What are you in for, my
friendf
Convict got ten years at hard labor for
swindling.
Understanding is very bad What labor
do you have to dot
Convict.Im in the shoe department, sir. I
cut out the pieces Of pasteboard which are put
between the soles
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-25
Stuck Again.
Puck.

Mrs. O'Hoolihan.-Faix Dennis! An phat
are yez afther 0oln' nowf
O'Hoolihan-Begob, Rosy. it's meself as has
bought a musicstool for Katie, an Olive been
woinding the bastely thing up for over an hour,
an not a dhrop Of music Oh get out of it at
all. ALL
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-25
An Enduring Proof Of Devotion.

Harper's Bazaar.
And do you really love me. GeorgeT she
asked
Love you" repeated George, fervently.
''Why. while l was bidding you goodbye on the
porch last night, dear. the dog bit a large chunk
out Of my Leg and never noticed it until got
home. Love you'll"
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-25
II seem. that They DID.

Philadelphia Press.
None but,snobs snub occasions like tho
constitutional centennial. The question there
fore arises were there any snobs, and il so, did
they snub2
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-25
The Son of His Father.


Colonel Grant said to a reporter who APP
preached him on his way homo from Saratoga
with a request for interview The opposi-
ton press has begun the cry that the son
of nv father / am proud enough of that not to
complain. But my father could not talk; neither
can trust you will not take my refusal as
discourteous. and wish you good day"
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-25

sands increased the number of shoals that had
to be avoided. the wide sweeps necessary to
avoid these made the journey so much longer,
and caused delay The wind although it did not
shift was brought round so by the windings OF
the stream that the said could not always be
used but the blacks bent to their oars and did
their best to make up for lost time.
And many obstacles were met with peculiar
to the ST. Johns There the floating is
lands formed by a prodigious accumulation of
that exuberant plant, the 'spistia.h which GER
tain explorers have justly compared to a egan-
tic lettuce spread on the top of the water. This
herbaceous carpet is solid enough for Offers and
herons to disport themselves on; but 1t would
never do to run into such vegetable masses as
withdrawal would not be easy. and SO Mars did
his best to avoid them.
On The river banks the thick forest again had
appeared But now there were none of thQse
innumerable cedars with their roots bathed by
the river There were in their stead, quanti-
ties of pines hundred and fifty feet high. be-
longing to the Southern species, which found a
favorable soil amid the inundated tracts known
as "barrens." The mould there has a peculiar
elasticity. so much SO as to throw man off his
balance should he attempt to walk overit. For
tunateiy James Burbanks men did not make the
experiment..
The ST. Johns continued to carry them
through the regions of lower Florida The day
passed without adventure. So did the night.
The river continued to be completely deserted.
Not a boat appeared on the waters. In this
there was nothing 10 complain Of Better to
find nobody in this distant country than to risk
disaster, for the backwoodsmen and professional
hunters OF these parts are people to be treated
with suspicion.
And there were the militia from Jacksonville
or St Augustine, whom Dupont and Stevens
had driven to the South, who might be met
with; and the meeting would have been still
more undesirable. Among them Texar certainly
had many partisans, who might attempt TO
avenge him on James and Gilbert Burbank. 1t
was the object of the expedition to avoid fight
ing with every except the Spaniard, and
only to fight with him should he attempt to
carry off his prisoners by force.
Fortunately, James Burbank well
served by circumstances that on the evening of
the 18th of March he reached Lake Washington.
There the narrowness and shallowness of the
river brought the boat to a stop. Two-thirds of
the distance had, however, been sailed or rowed,
and James Burbank now only hundred and
forty miles from the Everglades.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-25
Modern Business Methods.

Omaha World.
Adventurer-I have dropped in. sir, to buy
the Baltimore g. Ohio road.
New York Banker-Ahi Glad to sec you.
Take a seat. There is the safe: help yourself.
with pleasure. l can't buy a railroad with
out an office to buy it in. it's all the same
to you I'll take few hundred thousand and
open one"
s.Of course. Take the large bills they will be
less trouble to carry. What collateral have
you?"
Collateral Oh, I'll give you Baltimore &
Ohio bonds AS soon as buy the road"
ITO be sure. Never thought of that. II you
want any more money just send your cart
around. Good day, SIR"
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-25
Not In the Nature of an Advertisement.


new fve-cent cigar is called the ''AfidAvit"
Because il makes every body swear.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-25
The Wonderful Progress of Science.

Omaha World
Telephone Mantle progress of science and
invention is simply wonderful Do you know
Elisha Gray has just patented an invention by
which mans signature can be duplicated 800
miles aways
Citizen-Hadn't heard of it.
''It's a fact And way has been found to talk
across the ocean"
"You don't say sol"
True: and another inventor has found way
to transfer a mans portrait for hundreds of
miles, so the one ar the other end can know who
he's talking to-"
Yes. Well, just wish you'd send a man up
to look at my telephone. haven't been able to
use it for a week"
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-25
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

BE CONTINUED NEXT SUNDAY
National Republican., 1887-09-06
The Colnr Zinc Aholisheh.

The world moves, and wonderful things
are happening every day somewhere on this
terrestrial ball. one of the most wonder
ful has just transpirCd at Capon Springs
West Virginia. Mr.. Roger q Mills, OF
Texas, a Democrat of the stralghtest sect,
has son named Charles, aud, strange to
say, Charles is an employe Of the door
keeper OF the House, Of which Mr.. Mills Is
q member. IL Mr. Mills were Republi-
can this would be called nepotism.
MIR. Charles Mills has been spending some
time in resting from his wearlsome labors
at the Capon Springs, and being an enthu-
siastic adnirer Of the great national game
bad an amateur base ball nine that, when
ever opportunity offered, disported them
selves on the diamond field with the regu-
lation bat and ball.
The negro walters OF the hotel at Capon
Springs also had base ball nine, and a few
days since the nine Of Mr.. Mills met the
oololcd nine in a regular set game, with
the attache Of the Mexican legation here as
umpire, and the colored batters and lelders
got away with their white brothers.
II the old abolltionists like Joshua Gid.
dings are permitted, as was the ghost OF
the kingly Dane, to revisit the earth, how
1t must have rejUiced their souls to see the
son Of Texas Democratic member OF CJu-
gress at the head of eight OF his white
brethren In friendly contest for superiority
with nine of the desp'sed race. We can
imagine one of these old enthusiasts now
living reading the account OF this "a ne,
folding his hands and saying: "Now, Lord,
lettest Thou Thy servant depart in peace"
Surely the millennium is about to COM
mence. "The white.winged angel OF
peace" Of which stump orators have been
dscoursing for years, has descended, aud
CRpon Springs is the favored spot on earth
where It chose to fold its wings and rest.
| Democratic politicians of the south need
no more appeal to the whites to mass them
selves in solid column and "preserve the
white race against the contamination OF
negro equality'-the Georgia legislature
can let the Gilam bill go by default-the
southern railroads can dispose OF their
"lim crown cars aud put them where they
belong, 10 the cattle trains, for the meeting
in contest on the diamond field is meeting
where all men are equal.
Young MIR. Mills and his associates have
solved one Of the great political problems
Of the day-they have abolished the color
line.
AS further evidence that the work OF
Mr.. Mills and his associates in their efforts
to abolish the color line is duly appreciated
we find that as soon as the news was re-
ceived here humber Of colored men, some
of whom are ohceholders, held meeting
and declared in favor Of the Democratic
party.
National Republican., 1887-09-06
Letters are Dangerous.

President Cleveland has not properly
studied the value of the advice given by
that astute politician who said, "Never
write q letter" The President writes let
tiers, and some Of them are, to say the least,
unfortunate. That letter to the late John
Kelly, written when governor Of New York,
protesting against the return of the silver
tongued Grady because ''he interiered with
1he personal comfort OF the governor, was
one Of this class.
And row II is said that President Cleve-
land has written another letter, which, IL
we are correctly Informed, will act as o
boomerang. This letter was written to a
prominent federal official in one of the lar
gest cities Of the country, who has under
him large number OF employees, and said
IN direct words to the official that a certain
peJgOu-not an Olliclal-must not be per-
mittld to 20 as a delegate to the Demo-
cratic state convention.
Il fact this officer was directed to use
National Republican., 1887-09-06
"In the Name of the Prophet, Fig.,v

EDITOR NATIONAL REpUBLICAN Lam
exceedingly surprised at your audacity in
asking, as you do In this mornings REPUB-
LIcAN, "Who is Mr.. Mills?n Why, your
ignorance can only be compared to that dis
played by Theodore Hook, of very pleasant
memory long ago. Observing a very pomp-
GUS seli-satlshed looking old gentleman
walking along Bond street one day, Hook
him: STRAY, sir, excuse the apparent liberty
j take in thus addressing you, but would
you have the very extreme kindness to in.
form me II you are any one in particular"
JEFF Davis used to talk Of "my people;u
why cannot Mr.. Mills talk OF "my state of
TexasS" For all we know he may have u
mortgage ON it. sin the name of the
prophet, "FIGsn
National Republican., 1887-09-06

his official power to defeat certain Demo
cratic aspirant for the position OF delegate
TO Democratic convention, because he was
supposed not to favor certain views of the
administration. Tue person who received
the letter Immediately gave 1t to a prom'-
rent Democratic congressman, and the OBJ
noXious party was n delegate.
II this letter was written, as stated, 1t
hardly comports with that order OF Pres!-
dent Cleveland forbidding federal officials
from in any way taking part In nominat-
ing conventions, and It will come back to
plague him, both with his Mugwunp
friends and with the congressman who has
1t In his possession. We believe our in-
formant to be reliable.
National Republican., 1887-09-06
ANOTHER ACCEPTANCE.
The President VIII Attend the Banquet
OF the Hibernian Society.

OF the Hibernian Society.
PHILADELPHIA, Sept. 5.-The Hibernian
Society, Of this city, some time ago invited
President Cleveland to be present at it's
quarterly dinner on the afternoon Of Satut-
day, Sept. II, the closing day~pf the con
stitutlonal centennial celebration and have
Just received the following acceptance:
EXECUTIVE MANSION, WASHINGTON, Sept. 3,
lSS7.-THoMAs d. FERGUSON. Esq, secretary
TCdr Sir: have delayed responding to the in.
yitation of the Hibernian Society to attend
their dinner to be given on the afternoon OF
the 18th instant for the reason that have Just
learned definitely what my engagements Will
be on that day In connection with the consti.
tutional centennial celebration. / am only
able now TO say that 1t will give me great
pleasure to be present for a time at the dinuer
] am not prepared to fix the exact hour of my
arrival, and beg to be permitted to come with.
out delay or interruption of the proceedings
at such time as my other positive engagements
will permit.
With many thanks to the society for the
courtesy OF their invitation, am yours, very
truly. GROVER CLEVELAND.
Acceptances have been received by the
general committee from Bishop II. G. Pot.
ter, OF New York, and Frederick Douglass
of Washington, both of whom wrote pa.
triotic letters.
National Republican., 1887-09-06

THE article In the NATIONAL REPUBLICAN
yesterday morning as to the occurrence
Sunday on Twenty.ffth and Water streets
was no fancy sketch, but an actual relation,
rather under than overstated OF the facts
rs seen by a reporter. This being so there
is 10 excuse for the police department per.
uniting It, Two officers would as effect
lively disperse and prevent such meetings as
two hundred, aud Mai. Moore could GER
tainly find that number of men to prevent
such outrageous displays, even If he hal to
send fewer men in mutt to watch the saloon
doors and see which Of them committed the
enormous crime of selling drink on Sun
day.
National Republican., 1887-09-06

ONE Of the New Yoik metropolitan
journals editorally states that the Blair
educational bill proposes to "expend not
less than s77,0OOOOO year on (so.called)
southern illiteracy." The editor OF the
paper is an ex-member of Congress, and
the bill was introduced, discussed, aud
canvassed during his membership, SO that
ignorance cannot be pleaded as an excuse
for the statement. This only leaves one
conclusion as to what 1t should be called,
the AngloSaxon term for It being "lying."
The Blair bill proposes to expend $17,020000
In eight years. not in one.
National Republican., 1887-09-06

THE papers in the contest for a seat In
Congress by Mr.. Thoebe against Mr.. John G.
Carlisle have been opened at the clerks
Office, and reveal the fact that Mr.. Carlisle
has not taken any testimony to rebut the
evidence taken to show that Mr.. Thoebe
was elected. Mr.. Carlisle relies upon the
fact that Democratic majority of eleven
in the House of Representatives would not
unseat him no matter how clearly the testi-
mony might show that he was not fairly
elected. Doubtless Mr.. Carlisle's trust in
his party associates will be fully justified
by the result.
National Republican., 1887-09-06
The rhoebe-CarIisIe Contest

In the contested election case of Thoebe
ys. Carlisle the papers were opened to-day
at the office Of the clerk OF the House Of
Representatives and ordered printed. Mr..
Carlisle was his own representative, and
Mr.. j. Hale sypher represented the CON
testant. The papers consisted Of the notice
aud answer, an amended motto, and answer,
and some dispositions taken for Mr. Thoebe.
No testimony was taken in bohalf of Mr..
Carlisle.
National Republican., 1887-09-06
THE TREE OF LIFE.
REsTECTFULLY DEDICATED TO THE GENTLEM
or THE MEDICAL CONGRESS.

REsrEcTFuiLY DEDICATED TO THE GENTLEMEN
OF THE MEDICAL CONGRESS.
Within the gates Of Paradise.
Beneath those pure mud stainless skies,
n.y., The Tree ,i; 2i LIZ once bore ,0,O
Repaired OF human lite each waste,
Ana 30, without heavenly birth,
Gave Immortality on earth,
In the golden DAYS OF yore.
But vanished like n glorious dream
The Tree Of Life by Eden's stream,
Where itblo0mcd in the long ago
Sad cXilcs in the wilderness,
We travel now in sore distress,
No balm upon the desert found
10 heal the poison aud the wound
Lies weatiness and woe.
One bianch It's said, survived the storm
That wrecked that Eden-its fairest form,
The mystic Tree of Lilo
And from that branch the Cross was IN lde
On which the Sacrifice was laid,
1hot chauccd the Cross to the Living Tree,
To heal each woe, aud make us free
From all the deadly strife.
And ere the gates fast closed were swung,
Some leaves upon the air were flung
by the plying angels hand
And through the ages rs we haste,
Pitching our tents upon lies waste,
The healing leaves are found again
In remedies Tor human pain,
GalheICu Ill every Ihnu'
Along the centuries to this hour,
The fragrance of that Eden bower
Has fingered with the race
Until the best and bravest men,
Moses, Hippocrntes, Galen,
Luke. the beloved" their brethren all.
Have caught that perfume from the fall,
And longed It's source to trace.
And not in valn-that Paradise
Will one day greet our wondering eyes,
With the Tree of Life again
Over the noun tains Just ahead
Where faith and science jointly lead,
The topmoSt brancnes seem to rise
OF the golden Tree OF Paradise,
The balm for oil our pain.
Fen now our souls begin to burn
With instincts of that sure return
To our home with the opened door
The better life, the lengtheniug years,
The brighter smiles that Nature wears,
Are signals from the Fathers hand,
All telling of the promised land,
And the life iOrevermore. 1. H. G.
National Republican., 1887-09-06

A SOUTHERN paper, the Nashville Ameri-
ran, commenting on the Wheeling flag In
cident, says "the picture of the President
is appropriate at all places where American
citizens gather together, aud he who fails
to honor and respect 1t is traitor" 1t
might be interesting to know what style OF
uniform the writer Of that article wore
during The late unpleasantnGss.
National Republican., 1887-09-06

THE formal opening of the great interna-
tional medical congress was great sue
cess. President Cleveland has right to
be proud Of the reception which he received
from such body OF educated men of the
world. The Presidents action was In good
TASTE, being merely formal opening OF the
congress. The welcoming address of Secre-
tary Bayard was brilliant, witty, and timely.
National Republican., 1887-09-06
A Razor in Parsons Cell,

CHICAGO, Sept. 5.-1he cells of all the pris.
oners in the county jail were searched yester-
day. and in that of Anarchist Parsons was
found Il keen.edged razor, which was conils-
Gated Persons stormed and raved at this dc-
ing purpOScs,
National Republican., 1887-09-06
Congressman mills, of Texas, on Vir-
ninia Democrats.

72oI Platform adopted by the soc1Hct Demo.
crate party Ct Virginia wds something ertraor.
diadry. II must disguSt ercry Democrat both in
and outQfMe atttc. The present leatcrs Of he
Democratic party in Virginia are the quccres Sc!
oCim6tcies that erer rittncd a state.
National Republican., 1887-09-06
The Steamer aynlon Destroved

BALTIMORE, Sept. 5.-The steamboat Avalon,
ofthe Maryland Steamboat Company's fleet,
was destroyed by fire last night at Freepor,,
Va, on the Great Wicomico river She was
entirely destroyed. Damage, So, 900; insur.
National Republican., 1887-09-06
TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 9.
AmusOInonfa. a

HArrTs's BIloU-"Keep 1t Dark"
KEREAS's-Jack Sheppard Burlesque Co.
IuB MANASSAS AsPANoRANA-l6ths st. II Ohio av
National Republican., 1887-09-06
kIurdnred for Il Penny.

PUTNAM, CoHN, Sept. 5-At North Graz
vcuordale yesterday, one Swede named Nell
son kicked another named Anderson TO death
in dispute over penny matching. Nelson
has fed,
National Republican., 1887-09-06
THE PREPARATORY SCHOOL

. COLUMBIAN COLLEGE.
The exercises of this school will be resumed
on the 18th of September, with Il corps of seven
teachers The number of pupils Is limited TO
100, and applicants will be admitted in the
order of their registration.
A fifth class, limited in number to twenty
five, and to be composed of pupils seeking in-
struction In lower English branches and the
rudiments of Latin, preparatory to the regular
work of the school, win be formed at the be.
ginning of the year II sufficient number OF
pupils shall apply The class, with the daily
oversight OF the Principal, will be placed in a
separate room, under the charge of a teacher
who will devote his entire time to Its iustruc
tion.
Tuition fee, payable semiannually in I'D
vance, In the first four classes, ESQ; in the fifth
class, eco. No extra charge.
The Principal, or one of his assistants, WILL
from the LIST of September be daily at the school
building, 1885 ii street northwest, to answer
inquiries. ANDREW p. MONTAGUE,
au2O-lm Principal
National Republican., 1887-09-06
r Aw SCHOOL OF THE -
II COLUMBIAN UNIVERSITY.
THE FACuLT

THE FACULTY.
JAMES G. WELLING, LII. D.,
President.
THE HON. WALTER s. cox, Ill. D.,
Associate Justice of Supreme Court OF the Dis
trict of Columbia,
Professor OF the Law of Real and Personal
Property, of Contracts. and of Crimes
and Misdemeanors.
THE HON. WILLIAM A. MAURY, LII. D.,
Assistant Attorney General OF the United
States.
Professor of Equity Jurisprudence, of Common
Law and Equity Pleading. o; the Law
of Evidence and the Law of
Partnership.
GEORGE II. APPLEBY, ESQ,
Associate Professor of Practice and Judge of
Moot Court.
THE HON. WILLIAM STRONG, LII. D.,
Some time Associated Justice of the Supreme
Court of the United States,
Professor of Constitutional Law.
THE HON. FRANCIS WHARTON, LII. D.,
Solicitor Of the Department of State,
Professor of Criminal Law.
ROBERT q. FOX, LII. D.,
Treasurer.