Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1887-03-24
I WONDER

w ny tut hcpuullCduS Ot tlllS ClLY
don't rally and elect a mayor?
Who but an editor is expected to
understand everything?
Why so many make the mistake
of looking for judgment and eS-
perieuce in youth?
Ii the SUR of S4.45 will buv the
much needed respect for law and
order?
Would the President aud his
bride create greater pleasure for the
eye than the newly welded couple
lately seen in our city?
If broken head is ever what it
is cracked up to be?
What is the most unhappy side
of life? Suicide.
If it isn't right to shout chestnut
when people talk of "wipter lnger.
ing in the lap Of spring."
Which makes the most noise a
Waterbury watch or ihrashing
machine?
If a new tune didn't bewilder
certain choir Sunday night?
How the box car ride was enjoyed
by his highuess, (pomp) p)osity?
If one great mistake OF life is
Judging man by his appearances?
Who the boys were that indulged
in the following conversation: First
boy, Do you attend Sunday school
regularly now? Second boy with
supreme contempt No! not now,
I've got all can get ont OF it until
next Christmas.
II there are not number of
bowling dogs in this city which
could he spared without any loss to
the comfort of our citizens?
What is blacker than a she devil?
Thus queried woman OF q little
| girl while coming out Of church
! Sunday evening.
If the city will employ our band
10 give open ali concert, this sum
mer?
II a correspondent of an exchange
Is right when he says "One of the
nuisanoes of society is "calling."
A lady starts out robed in her best;
she sails along the street with the
bearing OF % full-gown turkey COB
/ bier; she ascends her neighbours
steps with the stately tread Of
buff cochin hen going TO roost
Once inside aud the programme is
about as follows Kiss, sit down,
talk about nothing OF any import
auce 10 anybody On earth, set up,
90 TO the door, stand aud caokIe
worse than pallct over ils first egg,
kiss again, move on aud repeat Tie
foolishness all the afternoon We
heard q lady remark that she had
made ten calls that day. Surely
Ilumbug thy name is Society Thore
is only one redeeming feature that |
can see about fashionable call aud
that is its breyity."
II it is not best TO load your gun
with tafy when you 20 goose hunt
ing?
Who are those indulgiag in break
ing window lights in various bust
uess places?
II any Pointers are lost in Chi
cago this week
If it is possible for a Presidant to
be nothing more than President
Of his party?
If man doesn't usually hug a de
luslou when he gets his arm around
one Of the fashionable girls2
If Patti receives $1,000 per night
for singing 10 Italian, what ought an
editor TO receive for q two-coumn
article written in pure, nervous, FOR
cibIe English?
If our citizens appreciate a good
concert enough 20 give the Fisk
jubilee Singer, a good house
lCommunicated.l
Why the ed.tor does not give Us
a piece Of printers "pi?'
How editors know everything?
Why they cal the new apprentice
the printers devil?
Why every effort TO attain 10 a
higher civilization is always violent
4 ly opposed?
Why otherwise decent young
men make disgusting nulsanGos Of
themselves by making pools Of TO-
bacco juice on our church floors?
Why protesting Christians and
all reasonable men don't vote az
they pray?
Why il is considered ganteeI to
poison the air with tobacco smoker
Why it is that some persons are
always complaining?
ENERGETIC parties can lind prof
liable employment by securing the
agency for Schultz German Com
pounds, something that shoad be
IN every household. Good pay guar
anteed. The number Of agents want
ed ia unlimited. address schultz
4 Co., Whitewater, Wis. or inquire
- s,,srfa al Mrs. &. <. Moore Min