Fort Worth daily gazette. (Fort Worth, Tex.) 1882-1891, 1887-11-06
Which Are the Truest and Most Un-
selfish Friends?-- Ella Wheeler on
an Interesting Question.
Views OF Different Women-Are Men
the More Generous in Friendships
Toward Neutrality-suspicious..
Some Entertaining Anecdotes-Men MorS
Ready, but W omen More Lasting
in Their Friendships.
CepyrIghted. 1851.

anecdotes and experiences were related.
The msjority of unmarried women ex
pressed quite unanimously an opinion in
favor Of the men. The married ladies
were less ontspoken, but the greater
number Of them were not enthusiastic in
their faith in mans friendship for woman.
Their skepticism might be attributed to
various causes. Perhaps they knew the
genus homo better than their single SIS
teIs did. Perhaps they did not think it
wise to encourage the dsmsels in their
dangerous even If true theory.
Many an unmarried girl is blind to the
virtues of women because she has not
time to study them. Her horizon is
bounded by masculine forms, AID she IS
quite content to have IL 80. By and by,
when she concentrates her attention and
interest in one man, and the others dis
appear like setting stars at the rise of
the sun, why then she notices the
beauty and fragrance of those human
howers-women.
heard one young lady, who had fought
a single-hsEded battle with the world,
and achieved success, declare that the
question was not even open to discussion
in her mind.
81 think no one is better judge Of the
matter" she said, "than woman who
has had TO mske her own way il life. /
received appreciation and encouragement
from men, when women gave me only in
difference or neglect. Men predicted my
success, while women feared l would fsil.
Men praised what they termed my cour-
age, while women criticised what they
termed my boldness."
Another lady declared that she would
invariably go to msn were she in need
of friendship or protection in time OF
trouble.
sH L were placed in compromising
situation, for instance" she said, "aud
wished to confde in some one, and had
only my own words to prove my limo
cence, do you think would trust myself
TO the mercy of woman? No, indeed.
And if had done wrong and needed q
confessor and counsellor, surely would
go TO man. Women are SO cruel to
their own sex"
At this jHncture I remarked that man
would always protect woman against
every man but himself. He would defend
her from the eeGsorious comments OF the
world quicker than another women would
and then spoil it all by compromising
her name herself.
Hereupon happy looking married lady
expressed her opinion.
"You have all given your theories
quoth she. "Now listen to my expert
ence. No girl ever possessed more gentle
man friends than L. My career was &
-sssf fss- INSIDE and selt-supportIng one also.
I, too, found men far reader with praise
and announcement than women were
Men proffered advice and aid, while wo-
men gave it if asked. Yet as time ad-
vanced found men far more selfish in
their friendship thsn women were. The
interest of my most platonlc male friends
noticesbly lessened afte- my marriage,
and In several cases turned into enmlty,
while women regarded NE with increased
favor.
"Men whose respect and admiration,
unmixed with any tender sentiment, l
would have sworn l had Won, did not
hesitate to shrug their shoulders and
sneer when msde en- excellent marriage,
and no longer needed their occasional
advice. l really think mans friendship
for an unmarried woman is always, even
if unconsciously to himself, selfish.
While she belongs TO no one he imagines
she in some degree belongs to himself,
and rejOices in her prosperity. When
she belongs to another man al this
ceases. Women are less enthusiastic in
the beginning, but their friendship wears
better"
''f don't know how it Is IN the matter
of friendship" ) young lady interposed,
"out l know when l go into any large es-
tsblishment shopping 1 always receive
better attention and more courtesy from
the statesmen than FROM the sales-girls.
II desire to be directed TO smother de-
partment in the store, always prefer to
ask man, as he is more willing and af-
fable in his manner.
a Young girl who h&d once published s
little book and sold it on the street to
passers by said: "Men are far kinder
hearted than women. Women looked st me
as If were doing some dreadful and i'm
proper act; men looked at me with SYM
patty snd interest. In any time Of dis
tress women look at you IS IL you were
lying TO them; men wait until they
catch you in lie, and then tell you of it..
They forget and forgive wrong, too, fsr
sooner then women DO"
Hereupon 1 remarked that once upon q
time asked favor of q gentleman in the
presence of two ladies'. The gentleman
expressed the deepest sympathy and the
most genuine regret thSt he could not
assist me. Both ladies voluntarily
offered the aid which had not thought Of
appealing for &c them.
think If you can once remove all idea
OF possible rivalry from G womSn's mind
she makes better friend than any man
living. Telja woman;your successes, and
she may show jealousy; but tell her your
sorroWs and your failures, and she is
moved 10 befrieDd you.
On the contrary, tell man Of your sue
cesses, and you win his adm;ring regard;
while If you tell him your troubles, you
weary him.
OAe lady said she thought men were
more prompt and agreeable, as q rule,
than our own sex In their manner OF be-
slowing favors, and it wss because they
were educsted to business methods. A
womsn often wounded your feelings from
NO lack Of kind impulses, but merely from
her awkwsrdness in dealing with any
matter outside Of psrlor or Kitchen. A
married lady said she quite conceded
with the last speaker in regard TO the
on siness methods of the sterner sex.
Thereup) IN she related her somewhat
unu susl experience.
81 Wse an artist" ehe said, ''apd my
g udio W IL the saae building in which
an elderly professional gentleman cccu-
pied en- office. He obssined En- intredac-
tion to me, and became greatly interested
in my work. He never once INDUCED Ia
the least sentiment toward me. His So
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