The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-08-24
WHAT PASSES FOR FUN.
The June bug disappears in June,
The lightning bug in May;
The bed bug takes MS bonnet of,
And ssys. "I'ye come to gtay.n

The bed bug takes his bonnet of,
And says, I've come to stay"
-Logansport Chronicle.
The majority of modern burglars do "a
safe business.-Duluth Photographer.
Flesh is heir to great many things, but
not to a bald-headed man.-New Haven
News.
Caliguls spent for one summer 800;
this must have included fees to the walters
-Eustis Lake Region.
It is not until a man reaches 30 that he
begins to wrap the small bills on the out
side Of his roll.-Puck.
"Some men are punished by prosperity"
says philosopher. Most men would like
TO be.-Somerville'Jo Journal.
A half-grown shark is said to be good
good eater.-Memphis Avalanche.
Wife-In the game OF lawn tennis, my
dear, what is the most difficult thing to
acqnireP' Husband-"rhe laWn."-Puck.
An exchange says: "Neyer make a bet
man this is no doubt good advice.-Tid
Bits.
Some New York capitalists are going to
start bank in China. 1t is mighty long
way from China to Canada.-Chicago
Times.
Patron, to milkman-Why don't you
reduce your milk rates? Milkman-Can't
affod to-unless l reduce the milk.-Bur-
ington Free Press.
The parched and burning earth echoes
the immortal sentiment expressed by the
Governor of North Carolina to the Gov
ernor OF South Carolina.-Buffalo Courier.
1t is probably untrue that Jay Gould
clips of his coupons with lawn mower.
EQene in oofr
the coupons float off into tank.-Spring-
field Union.
A man recently cut one of his rooster
wings, and then gleefully told his neigh
bors that the bird could not get into his
garden on account of his defective flew
Harper's Bszar.
Precocious youngster, in house where
there is telephone in constant use, finish
ing her prayer-"And make me a good
httle girl. Amen! Good by, oh Lord; o.
K."-Exchange.
The Pennsy lvania Revenue Commission
intends to frame bill that will hold water,
That is probably the reason why they have
gone to the seashore to practice on it,
Pittsburg Dispatch.
What do the ladies wear nowadays,
anyway" asked cynical bachelor, eyeIng
scantily arrsyed beauty at ball. "0h, +"
replied his companion, they put on lots
OF style, that's all."-Burlington Free
Press.
Said a worthy gentleman to one of his
friends: u wish you would try and make
my son see the error of his conduct" But
why don't you do it yourselt?' "Well,
you see, being his father, have but little
influence over him.-Judgs.
Mrs. Bsgley-"I found an eel in the milk
pitcher after you left yesterday morning"
M1kman-"And cells fifteen cents pound
Well, it was my mistake, and l shan't take
cent for it."-Philadelphia Call.
Grandpa-Who was the first President
| of the United States? Four-year-old-
| Don't know. Grandps-George Washing
| ton was. Now you know, don't you
| Four-year.old-No, / don't know it.
only have your word for it.-Arkansaw
| Traveller.
Sarcasticus entered his wife's room unex-
| pectedly and was greeted with scream.
My, you frightened me half to death 20
exclaimed the better half. ibid 1? was
| the sympathetic response. l will go out
and try it over against. Paul Herald.
MRS. Dusenbury, was astonished when
l saw Mrs Chadwick at the reception last
| night" "Astonishedl Why, she attends
| all social gatherings. What astopished
| your "The fact that her husband wa:
with observation-disclosures Call.
BE the powers, Misther Doolan," said
| Bridget to the ice-man, otis yerself that
won't be able to see at all, purity soon."
can what makes ye think that?" BE.
| cause Olive noticed that yer ice has been
| failing very much of late. Washington
| Critic.
Lucy Gray Rigden, in magazine article,
| asks: How shall we help women from
| fallipg" We can tell you Lucy. In the
| first place, they should always wear creep
| ers. And to make assurance doubly sure,
| they should never attempt to climb.-Chi.
cago Sunday National.
When a Kentuckian sued a doctor for
| malpractice, he didn't suppose the physi.
clan could have any defense. He was
| therefore psraly zed when twenty-five doc.
tors took the stand aud swore they would
have set the broken limb Just exactly that
wsy.-Detroit Free Press.
"No, couldn't take poor, dear Carlo to
| the seaside. He never would do at ALL
| Cicely, dear" "And why not? He il
the incest pug in the CITY," "Pug? That:
| Just what is the matter with him. If ne
| was black and tan he would match q sea
| side complexion icely."-Hartford Post