New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1887-05-15
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

Speaking Of Colonel watterson "The waterbury,
American says: at Ia not we believe generally
known that, as o young man, he tooh 1t into ha
head to visit England, and served his fun tlTo there
az reporter on the London papers. It was thea
that he became a rabd antangiomsniac, of which
bc has given evidence In his recent letters from
abroad. But 1t was not In London that he learned
how to run newspaper There Is no moro American
journal In the world than The Louisville Courior-
Journal"
The people of Rising Sun. Texas, have formed
themselves into sort of anti-roverty society and
and work properly. Recently family of ioaier:
thai nna G arns out 'as
DO the work over as l. ought TO be done and warned
hsm gnas sney To Move 20 some other re
-tSpnngfeld Union.
Tho New-Jersey papers are still quarrellng oves
tho question where the State centennial shall bs
celebrated Newark claims the celebration on the
ground that she Is great metropolis and the papers
Of tho other cities claim 1t on the common ground
that Newark ALFRED big in her own estimation.
and ought to be taken down peg or two
The rivalry between st. Paul and Minneapolis Is.
Ii anything, sharper than aver, we may judge from
tho following paragraph In "The Minneapolis Tr1o-
uno" "while st. Paul ia putting on metropolitan
airs because there murder over there every week.
Mlnnea polls Is saying nothing. but saving wood with
great industry. We may not be able to get up
frstcass killing. but do point with pride to tho
most remarkable case of faith-heanng on record"
Conductor-B-o-ston- stationi
say Vi does does the train stop there s' 40 -
Conductor-No passengers have to Jump as we 90
Granger msAes for the platform with tho carpet
bag bouncing from seat to seat-tBurington Free
Press
"The st. Paul Pioneer Press" allows its "Casuai
Listener" to speak of "Erastus wyman. a scientific
man Of Washington. think" He should do hss
thinking and more listening.
The Russian Finance Minister proposes to tax the
nrst twenty eggs laid by every hen In the empire IL
will be interesting to see how such fantastic law
will be enforced. The Russian hens may submit to
such a highhanded proceeding. but the American hen
would rebel II she couldn't do anything else she
would refuse to lay tho first twenty eggs
An envous Engshman declares that rich Americans
will soon buy up the works Of French artists fast
as they are painted As there are nearly 10000
French artists busiy plying the brush. It would
seem that rich Americana numerous as they are have
O pretty big contract on their hands.
THAT'S not a bad Iandscape-the new one there.
1 mean. Who painted iti" 60,
IA. young n s.,, shag a aa%sd Sincere"
ayes. Indeed Why, he was a favorte pupil Of
Raphael Michael Angelo or some other old master;
CTown Topics.
usually man. does tho work about this way: He
takes possession OF the key, uniocks the door and
disappears After while he comes back turns down
the bedclothes and goes Off The next time be comes
In he Partially completes the bedmaking. but leaves
In a great hurry. as If he bad suddenly remembered
something After the sixth Visit the Mexican reures
with his dust brush and Is pretty safe TO wager he
Will only come back once more and that to bring
clean towel After he has done this for an hour or
two, he out hat he spends the rest OF tho
day ID taking siesta
His Last Resort "A poor devil was bcing dlstraned
for rent In the Island Oh sichy' he p'eaoeo WIN
Your E.ceIency can you not stop them Selling
Have you brought something on accOuns'"
"Nen don SEQ how | can help you"
"Ah, Your Excellency. I've done all ! could 70
my gun and concealed myself In lonely In the road:
but alas luck agast me. Not stranger would
| pass by."-iTid-Bits.
That E Pluribus American Colonel Pat Donan
says: al am in favor of a constitutional amendments
prohibiting any untuored American citizen. rcdoiens
OF PORK wheat gouges and stock swndiers,
from going abroad to air his sded ignorance and Vu-
garity until he has seen his own country would
demand. prerequisite for permission to visit LONDON
erdashers' establishments. Partisan miners shops
and Itaian skies and nacaron hasheles certificate
from the president general passenger agent Of some
| great Southern Western or Northwestern aIroad
that the woud-be foreign voyager had visited al the
glorious and beautiful scenes along the nne."
Green Hand senced Chicago Edltor-write .
| Professor De Science. A. B. DID. G. T.. Eff q. q u"
recently spent some time IN Chicago
New Assstant-He merely assed through Chicago
on his way from Pekin back to London
"well. no had to hang around rhiGoad depos
three four hours waiting for the trains to connect
| didn't hel"
"Mo~t likely"
al that ism spending some time IN chicago wn2s
| Is it"-tOmaha World
"The Toronto Globe" complains that dogs have be-
come a nuisance in the streets Of Toronto Have
men and women boys and girls" 1t asks mo rights
which dogs are bound TO respectl 1t would seem
not How many accidents caused how many
horses are frightened. how many people are bittens
because the dogs are lords OF the walk They take
possession Of the sidewalks by night and by day.
Whether asleep awake all have TO move out OF
theI neighborhood"
Mr. Charles Mackey jeers at the sentence "when
the hay Is 10 the now" evidently under the impression
thai the last word q substantive coined from the
verb ITO now" "If good English" no says,
"why should 1t not DO followed by such companion
compositions as When tho Is In the reap
vi hen tho sheep are the shear When
the cows arc In the milk Z" Some day Mr.. aackey
Will lind out what Q blunder he has made. and then
he will want TO 20 out the back yard and kick
himself.
hotel clerk, who came down here from New
YORK. said that he had acled this evil b'avely at
hrst and had lad down law the most appro, ed
style. but .manana" had been too much for HIM
sad he: This laundry business has made ME scAer
than anything struck In the hotel line. Do you
nowi Three days before q guest clothes have been
MESSENGER out to the iaundress morning and
night each time with little stfon er message uan
thai wan, those clothes. washed Or unwashed. wet
or dry Tho next morning the laundress al rives With
her basket under her arm."tMexican Letter In st
Louis Globe Democrat
xnPppc,S RpNFEYT