West Virginia Democrat. [volume] (Charles Town, W. Va.) 1885-1890, 1887-09-09

Jrleu IL, du luT CT iduuS ttihc uiuh
pay no ertention ter her, but arter
while l 'gunter feel sorter 'noyed.
Hit me wild er wash bod luther day
split dc bod, an it cost cr quar-
ter-an' it hut me, sab, it did, but
1 lowed ter merse'f dat / better not
pay no 'tention ter her. Shortly af-
ter dat come home one day sorter
libely. WANT drunk, Mars Simon,
sw'ar ter de goodness want, but
somehow she didn't look at it in dat
light. Wimin is cuis dat way. Doan
know whether yer hab noticed it er
not, but it is er fack. Whut yer
reckon dat lady done, Marse ST.
mon?
"Gave you a forcible piece Of her
mind, | suppose.
"Huh, eff dat had been all would
not er paid no 'tention ter hit. Tell
yer whut she done She waited till
/ got ter sleep, den tied me hard an
fas' in de bed Bout de time she
got me tied good woke up. Look
yere, Flavy, whut yer doin'Y 'Doan
'sturb yerse'f by tryin' ter talk vile
yer's so sick, fur Use erfeered dat it
mout hurt YER she piled. She went
ter er bar'l dat set in de corndcr,
tuck cut de carpet rags and de set
tin hen, fixed de hen on her aigs in
ernuder cornder, an den 'gunter tar
de bar'l to pieces. hutyer 'stroy-
in dat fine piece er property fur Fla
vyr says /. She didn' answer me
er tall, but, takin' up one o. de slaves,
she cum up TO der bed. TIA kere, ia
kere,' says l, fur seed de lady's
plans. 'Doan yer hit me wild dat
stave, fur yer do dar's gwine ter be
some wool scattered roun' desc yere
premisis.' Bout dat time 'ker-bim'
she took me wild dot stave, an, de
Law'd er massy, / thought | wuz
gwinc ter burn up right dar in mer
own bed, dat cos me two dollars and
er halt. Want no use to rare and
scotch, 80 thought I'd try 'suasion
and da do say dat Pse er fust-rate
ham at de mourner's bench. %,
dear sister Flavy,' ] yelled, thinkin'
dat I'd hit her on de stranth o dc
church. let dis cuppass;' ker-whack.
'Oh, Sister Flavy, turn yer bright
min on de day O de penticos,.
"Did that cause her to desist?" the
Governor asked.
"Come ergin."
"Did she stop"
"Wall, sab, | kaint say dat she
did till she'd dun wore me bedacious
ly out. Oh, / thought was gwine
ter melt right dar an run out on de
flo, but didn't. She got through
finally an went away on er visit ter
some O. de neighbors.
De naixt thing ] recollecks wuz
lyin' dar wild de rope of. / didn't
say nuthin, an Flavy neber let on,
but wuz longin' ter git well crnuii'
ter han'le de lady. Day afore yes
terday, while ] wuz gwine erlaung
home, i found er hoop-pole. | took
It erlaung, sorter smilin' to merself.
Flavy wuz out in de yard, an know
in dat / could outrun her i didn't
feel erfeerd.
"Whut yer doin', FlavyY' says [
walkin' ont ter wher she WIZ.
"'Countin' de young chickens.
says she.
"'How is yer feelin' dis ebeningY
"'Honey,' says /, de doctor tells
me dat yer's gettin' too fat an dat
yer oughter take mo- exercise like dc
white ladies, an ] 'cluded dat 1T
hep yer take it,
"'Oh, yer's er good man, Potts,
says she, an Use almo' sorryidat !
whipped ye dc oder day. g
'''Is yer, honey?
"'Deed / is
"'Sho, 'nuffT a
Didn't ] tell ger deed / isy
"'Oh, yer 'courages me SO much,
says I. Honey, Use dun fotch dc
thing dat'll gin yer de exercise
"'Yer doan' tell me-
"I does fur er fack.'
"Den / stepped ter de corndcr o
de house whar had lef de hoop
pole
"'W'y, dat's er funny thing tercx-
ercise wid.'
"Yas,' says !, an kerwhop /
wrapped it all croun' her. She
made at me, but, huh, dat lady wuz
too fat ter ketch me. Ebery time
she'd try ter git outen dc yard I'd
fetch her er wallop, an yer ougbter
heered dat lady yell. Now yer
knows al erbout it, Mars Simon;
an femme tell yer de lady sense "a
kim dat dose er medicine is settled
down inter er right spectacle oman.