Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1887-09-13
MISCELLANEOUS.
Mr.. ard Mrs. Rowser.


After supper the other evening Mr.. Bowser
pulled lot of statements of accounts from his
pocket with great gravity of demeanor, aud
spreading them out upon tie ccntre-table. he
said:
Mrs. Bowser. do you see these"
lido"
"Do you know-what they are :" n1.: a-'T'
"Why, they are the monthly accounts from
the grocer's." ...-...
"Oh, they are! Well I should say so! Do
yon know what this family has devourcd.
wasted or given away to the Polacks in the last
month ?"
al know that we have been very econom-
icaI" u
ado you! The grand footing is s64, Mrs.
Bowser-over Sl5 per week for family of
four. and one of them baby and the other n
hired girl with the dysPepsia am no miser,
but pronounce this an outrage. ,-.s
But havn't ordered anything extra. and
I've tried to be very careful and buy close"
Mrs. Bowser, its your poor buying and
poor management. You don't know any more
about running n house than / do of bossing a
steamboat. Either that or else grocers are
swindtng me. and won't stand it. Hereafter
/ shall do all the buying"
gave the cook orders to tell him what she
wanted, and next morning Mr.. Bowser entered
upon his new duties. The first purchase he
made was buShel of potatoes from a peddler
in front OF the house. He gave clio and told
the man where to carry them. When he came
home to dinner the cook had to tell him:
II put that bushel of potatoes into three
pecks. and then cut up the whole lot to get
good ones enough for dinner"
The first thing that came up from the grocery
was a consignment of ten cans of pumpkins.
This was followed by fifty pounds of cvapora-
ted apples and 100 dozen clothes pins. As
nothing further appeared the cook boiled some
potatoes. made a pumpkin pie and stewed some
of the apples. When he went down 10 dinner
Mr. Bowscr looked around in astOnishment.
'.What does this mcan?" he finally de-
mauded.
"why it's all you sent"
He couldn't gainsay that. and by and by lie
explained that he had saved fully dollar and
a-half on his purchases by buying in such
quantities.
- You paid ten cents per can for pumpkins,
willie got the lot for seven,'' lie went on
q Thirty cents isn't so very much, but It is rs
good to me as to the grocer"
eyes. but / bought about one can month.
You have enough here to last us three years"
"Well, saved forty cents on the apples ?"
he protested.
1--WE have Just used two pounds in the last
six months Mr.. Bowser. At that rate you la Ie
laid in a supply for two years."
There was look of terror in his eyes, and
lie dared not proceed 20 clothes-pins nor say
word about the potatoes.
went down with him next morning. and as
we halted in front of the grocery he called out +:
"Say. Green. n roast for dinner-two quarts
of NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. head of
cabbage"
When we had driven away he said TO me:
eve were just eleven seconds in front of
that grocery. You'd come down here and fool
away half an hour to give the same order
You've got to be right up aud down to business
with these fellows"
When we came TO sit down to dinner we had
roast pork and Strawberries and boiled cab
bage.
Il want to know what this means 20 ex-
claimed Mr. BOwscr, as lie showed back.
"Tbis is what you ordered, dear. and it
didn't take but eleven seconds. You didn't
specify the sort OF roast you wanted and you
didn't tell the cook whether you wanted the
cabbage boiled. fried or baked. You are run
ming the kitchen now you know"
He swallowed few nOuthfuls. tried hard to
change the subject, and after dinner he went
into the kitchen and said To the girl T.
Hannah. want sweetcake, tarts, hot biscuit,
rasPberries and Clipped beef for supper"
Very well, sir"
"TH send up everything as go down"
"Yes, SIR
About mid-afternoon a gfocer's wagon delir-
cred pound of cloves. pound of cinnamon
and beefsteak. Wren Mr.. BOwser came
home to slipper the cook called him into the
kitchen and said
"Did you bring the Bakers bread, sirS"
why, no. I told yOu we d have hot bis
cult"
But I've no -four"
"Thcn why didn't you say so ?"
..Fbe missus always asks me, and you didn't
say word The lard is also ont"
/" But the beef ?"
al can't chip raw beefsteak, sir They
probably misunderstood your order"
"And the tartsF''
Ihad nothing to make 'em of, and in this
country We don't make sweetcake of cloves and
cinnamon. Where's them raspberries
IL forgot en-"
Mr. Bowser had the beefsteak. dnd worked
away on the eyaporated apples and a remnant
of the pumpkin pie When we retired to the
sftting-room Mr. Bowser did some hard think
ing for while and then observed:
''Mrs. BO#sef, you are a very poor buJer." "
"a presume So"
"And very eItrnysgant Woman.