davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23

"Well had not done anything, but had
good general education and could take notes
in shorthand if man would not talk too
fast | could also soon learn TO operate a
typewriter, think"
"You had read in the papers, then, about
the young women who came to New York
and. after playing ON the typewriter for six
months in the office of wealthy widower,
married him"
"Yes, had read that, but did not expect
to do SO myself"
81 am glad you did not, for you would have
been disappointed, perhaps. The opportuni-
ties for a young woman to obtain situation
IL the office of a middle aged capitalist whose
wife is consumptive and trying to draw to
hectic flush are getting to be rare, and though
you might win the esteem Of such one and
| lull him to rest by knocking a few low,
throbbing notes out of your typewriter, yet
would advise you not to depend on finding
such situation as that
"rhen what would be your advice."
"You say you never stenographed very
much."
"No, but l studied 1t at school and can
make all the characters after think little
while"
"You think you could take down in short
| hand the address OF deliberate talker-his
postoflice address, | meant"
"Oh, now you are guying me. or course l
cannot write shorthand very fast, but l
would be willing to learn"
"NShat salary would you expect while
learningln
"Oh, | would not demand large salary at
first, but / would try, oh, so hard, to learn
rapidly"
"You never tried other work, did you such
as plastering. plotting on steamboat, train
dspatrhug, lion tanning, surveying, butcher
ing, piiaio tuning pugilism, searching for the
north pole, singing bass in minstrel COM
pany, catching elephants for the trade, brak-
ing on a passenger train, acting as the fore.
man of n grand jury, breaking colts, dealing
'aro, grinding scissors, jumping off the
Brooklyn bridge, selling lightning rods, run.
ming for sheriff, tending bar, robbing trains
numbering, chiropodizing or shoemaking"
NO, sir, couldn't do any of those"
"Then, ii were you, would go home.
would abandon New York to its fate and re-
turn to my parents. There you might teach
school next winter, perhaps, and do well.
with your knowledge of stenography you
might successfully teach it, no doubt, but you
could not practice it. A business man wht
was in hurry would hesitate about employ
ing You it he thought you would have to 60
to the hrtton of your trunk for your boob
every time you struck hard word"
Happening to look down to tine pier at that
instant / saw that my steamer was impa
tiently waiting for me- and so, bidding my
unknown friend adeu, after telling her to b'
careful not to breathe any OF the nlght AR
which is so prevalent at Coney Island thl
year, touc ed my hat, with we'll bred ali
that would have fooled most any one, nnC
was soon lost to sight.-New York World.
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23
m.DsUNMER MADNESS.

"Bring hithcr, bring hlther my red bantbox,
Bring nither my bandbox green,
And my bandbo1 brown from London town
And my box Of silvern sheen.
sand it's oh for my trunk of leather tough
And my trunk of oak ribbed zinc,
And my trunk so tough, of canvas stuff,
That will bulge, but will not shrink.
"oh, pile them high with the robes wear,
Till their lids they overflow;
My lord he will stare, and elSe he will swear,
But in they will have to 60"
"oh, waly waly, my ladye fair,
Now whittier and will We flee?n
ITO Mount Saint Bushalof- Worri- Ancair
On Conyile-by-the-Sea."
They have seizen her boxes one and all,
In the Tavern Laftte de Kidd,
and loudly for help the porters call,
AS they stack them up in entry and hall,
And pile them high against bulkhead and wall;
But wherever they stow them, great and small,
Far out of her reach they are slid.
Her room is cell fathom long,
Her bed is a thing of fears,
Where all night long the noseless song
OF the wingless bird she hears.
And her lord he lies in a hallway lone
On a sleep destroying cot,
Where she hears him groan in wrathful tone
IT'S (Hush9 "Its" Csh Hush )--"hotlr
And all this time in their home in town,
mansion of cool gray stone
There are peaceful glooms in seventeen rooms,
Where the burglar sleeps alone,
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23
The cnnnuerinr of scIr.

Dramatic Critic-l can't imagine how yoA
can appear to be so carried away with yon'
part when according to your own admission
you do not feel a word of it.
Great ActresS-I became proficient in that
art by long course of training b, fore | went
on the stage.
"At dramatic SCHOOL,
"No, was a sales girl in millinery store,
and when customers were around ! had 10
admire all the new bouncts. "-Omnha World,
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23
WEEKLY CONTENTS:

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week. Good original stories from the best
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able and edited by practical farmer.
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work, literary culture, social advancement
and entertainment.
Outings and Innings, caters to the pure
aud healthful entertainment of young people
of both sexes in every station of life.
The Market Reports come from every i'm
portant commercial centre and may be relied
upon as absolutely correct up to the hour of
going TO press.
The War Articles that have attracted so
much attention for their interest and accura-
cy will be continued Throughout the coming
year.
A SAMPLE COPY FREE
Of both the WEEKLY PRESS and its mag
niticcnt Premium List will be sent to any
address upon application. Be sure you are
getting the most and the best for your money
before you subscribe Address
THE PRESS CO. Limited
Philadelphia.
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23

Additional Trains,
On SATURDAY only will leave Dupont Station at
100 and 7.C2 p. m, NewbIidge at l2O and 7l5 p. m.
for Wilmington and all intermediate points.
French Creek Branch Trains,
Leave Springfield H. AIM and 90 p m on weeks
days, and 9.l3 a m on Sundays.
Arrive st. Peters ll.I0 a. m, and $50 pm on week
days, aud So a m Sundays.
For connections at Wilmington, Chadd's Ford
Junction, Lenape, COatesyille, Waynesburg juno
tion, BTdsboro and Reading, see timetable at all
stations,
A. g. MCCAuSLAND, +, b. HlBBARD,
superintendent. Gen. Pas. Agent.
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23
A Mnefnl HlsinI,N.

Two friends are walking along the street.
One OF them, pointing to Il house, says:
"There's n beautiful place, hut its enough
to make man sad to look at it,"
"Why sos"
"On account of its history, for, despite its
calm and serene surroundings, it was built
upon the groans, tears, wailings and blood Of
widows, orphans, old men and struggling
women"
"You don't say. Was it built by railroad
monopolist!"
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23
wornan's Ways.

When lovely woman's feet are sCvens,
And such size her soul ahhors,
What does she then? Why. gracious hcavcnsl
She squee2cs them in number fouls,
And when the years come onward pacing
And show her waist increased in size,
What does She? Flies to tighter lacing,
And shows her suffering in her eyes.
And when old age draws nigh and higher,
What then does lovely women do?
She makes herself right down l-r,
And says, IN soon he thirty.two"
j. Capp in New York Mercury.
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23
GnndIy. Gnnsr.

Little do you know how we bartenders
are imposed upon. Woe is our lot. Today
a six footer entered our saloon and called for
brandy. He iAhihed a large quail.
elias Goosy been in he asked.
"'Whose Goosy sid |.
"'Goosy walks like this.
"The six-footer drooped on his launches,
spread his legs alart like painfully handy
legged being and waddled towards the door.
Suddenly Strengthening himself out, he
howled at me 'GoOdby, Goosy, and fled a
mile up the street before found time to run
from behind the Philadeluhia News.
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23
A Doubtful Compliment.

Candid Crtic-Good photo, madame, but
it does not do you iustice-in fact it does not
give you credit
Ancient Spinster dn a flutter of righteous
modestyl-Oh, sir! you tiatter ME
Critic--In fact it does not give you credit
for the last fifteen years Of your age Judge
very SOciabre.
"The people of New York are not very
sociable, are they" said IA western man, ad-
dressing an acquaintance who lived in the
east.
"Well, don't know but they are, although
they may be little peculiar in that respect.
For several years 1 had my office in a very
large building on Broadway. One day fell
low came in and asked il my name was ]. w.
McFiddleton. l told him it was, and then,
after few moments silence, he said: My
office is just across the hall, and ever since
saw your sign several years ago have been
intending to drop in and see you. l am
your brother, you know, and-well, how are
you getting along, anywayf Yes" con-
tinued the eastern man, "they are a trifie
peculiar, but after you get in with them you
find them very sociabe. '-Arkansaw Tray-
eler
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23
Looking for an Internal Improvement.

Looking for an Internal Improvement.
He sat on log on the banks Of an Arkan-
saw creek, when traveller came along and
saluted:
Good day, mister. Waiting for a rise"
"That's just what 1 am waiting for" was
the reply.
"Got fatboat up ssseam!"
"No, sir. I'm a government engineer.
Congress has appropriated SlS 900 to improve
this river. and Pm waiting for risc 50 can
find the stream. How long since you saw
anything of it?n-Wall Street News.
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23

Let packages of soap and spelling books be
rattered through the Businesses of the Mem
bres, the Sierra Blanca and the Mogallon
mountains Discovering these the Indians,
impelled by fatal curiosity, will try to find
ont their use Soap is pcrniCious to an In
dian. 1t enfcebles his constitution on the
first application Then, while the agony Of
his first cleanliness is upon him, he will des-
perately SEEK relief from the spelling book,
and the first touch of ruliment'iry education
will KILL him This method is cruel perhaps,
but II Is sure.--New York World.
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23

Additional Trains,
On SUNDAY only will leave Springfield at
42O p IN Birdsbora 4.52 Up m and Reading 5 % IN.
onSAruRDAY Onlv, will leave Wilmington at Ills
p IN. for Newbridge, Dupont, and all intermsd.
late points.
French Creek Branch Trains
Leave St Peters G5Oam. and l2.25 pm weekdays
and 8.55 IN on Sundays
Arrive springfeld72j am. and 100, p,m,on week
days, and Il on Sunday,
GOING SOUTH, DAILY Except sunday)
Sund.
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23
Prevention nettcr thnn cnrc.

a hope, my dear" said a newly made Bene-
dict, "if l should happen to he out nights
occasionally you won't be lonely"
"Oh, no, DEAR" she replied swectly. "If
YOU should find it necessary to he out Ill send
for ma to keep me company"
He's home early every night.-Nem York
Sun
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23
ooh. come now. y
In Need of a Prefix.

"Hello old boy! Heard you're going to be
mnrried-and a fine girl, too, eh"
swell, yes, she has very comely figure"
"Oh, but that's aside from the question.
How about the incomely tigureF-Detroit
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23
Popular Among the People.

He after church, What a very eloquent
man the Rev. DIR. Whiterhoker is, Miss
Breezy. ! was delighted with him.
She tof Chicago there are no flies on
Dr. Whitecloker-Ne York Sun.
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23
sirns ar s,mmer FIIchts.

First Beer Garden Water-Mrs. De Goode
Is off for the summer again.
Second Waiter How do you know any
thing about that fine lady'S movements'
"Mr De Goode has just come in."-Omaha
World.
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23
A Cnrinns oycrsicht.

Husband full of fine humorl-1here is
something very curious about Henry George
Wife-What'S curious about him!
Husband-Why, he hasn't got any last
name.-New York Sun.
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23

1t is so light that c'tlld can run 1t.
SO quiet that it will not interrupt an ordin-
ary conversation.
So durable that it viii last, with care, a
life time.
1t is adjustihle so that all lost motion can
be taken up.
II has the best wood work-the best and
most durable ever made.
The attachments can oe placed on iu Sec
ond without the dse of the thumb-screw or
screw driver.
Every attachment works perfectly and can
be used with ease oy any one.
It's reputation is far above the average.
No one is asked to buy until they are
thoroughly satisfied as to its merits.
Every machine is guaranteed as repre-
sented Or money is refunded.
Do not make mistake, have no other,
thy it, and be convinced If it is not all that
you want in sewing machine do not buy it..
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23
The ohild is mother OF the woman.

Edith-Here comes little Elsie. Shall we
speak to herl
AIabel-No; don't you see she's got her doll
in last years carriagel-Tid Bits.
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23
Dnnrers Of Fducniiun.

Hotel Guest-I don't believe in this modern
custom of tipping l want You to under
stand that.
Waiter-I's been 20 school, sab, an | hap
pen to know there amt notIiin' modern about
it, sab The custom is as old as civilization,
sab.
"Oh, come now"
"Fac', sab l learned in history, sah, that
one timo q rich man like you named Caligula
went somewhere to supper an it cost him
SIOO, 600 before he got through, sab, BY the
way, sab, all the things you ordered is out,
sah Omaha World.
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23
Weekly Press
THE BEST OF
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Only 81 90 Per Year.
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FAVORABLE COMBINATIONS WITH ALL THE
POPULAR LITERARY AND CLASS
PERIODICALS,

THE WEEKLY PRESS is printed in
bold clear type. 1t is staunchly Republican
in politics.
The Wilmingtonian., 1887-07-23

& NORTHERN RAIL.
w ROAD SCHEDULE MAY 10. 1887.
GOING NORTH, DAILY, Except unday.)
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-01-14
The Cunning Gonbpr

Probably every one who settles in
southern California and undertakes to
cultivate lawn has at one time or an.
other declared war against the gopher
whose burrows are nong the most in
tricate Olany mammals. must con.
fess having attempted to drown out
'slrsssssers. 1 introduced a
hose lntotN brow through which a
gopher lad moment before passed,
and SAT down patiently to wait its re-
appearance. This was year ago, and
| am confident that the water would
have been running in yet if l had not
ditoif after several hours Of waste.
Since then have allowed a full stream
to run into a gopher hole for eight
hours, and it never ran out. 1t is need
less to say that the gopher never was
drowned out. | discovered the secret,
however when the water was turned in
and ran of no one knows where.
The little animal merely crept up a
side tunnel to a chamber of observation
quite near the surface, and there, high
and dry probably dozed away the
tim with one eye on me from its little
window lalled TO sleep by roar of
waters BY the door. At least the gopher
that czpenmented upon me played this
trick, and it will probably be found
true Of al Their tunnels have several
openings at the surface, and extending
of in Voritable maze, constituting a
regular drainway Of great length. l
believe these tunnels are merely the
streets Of an underground city, as the
nest, when have found it, has always
been directly at the surface in the little
apartment named. SIN Francisco CaR.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-01-14
Two Bee stnrio.

.,f,,l inst.,,.
A pain'si .s'a'ge n. q tae terrible ron.
sequences y P'''oAAg bees is connected
with one q 'lie lovelest sights in Indi,
the famous Marble Rocks i .IalI,ls'
These rocks form a gorge tbron.,b ,.i... :
the great river Nerbuida aovs an5 1
marble formation extends fer .l,aa. =
mile. The dazzling walls which sbat +"
the river are studded with nop1aet h.o.,
nests, and for any one proeee8jpa il
boat down tae narrow channel q Gj.tnrb
the bees is a fatal proceelns If anv
warning we're required, it Is eive, H.
tomb which stands on Tie o1tst,irt. n
the village just above the oargo ! M
memory Of o G WHO was stang I, death
in this beautiful spot AcmateI H.
foolish impulse he fired his III. ~ ono
Of the nests, whercupoa the bces c,mo
down on him in such numbers that be
attempted TO save himself by jumping
overheard. The relentless insects how
ever i'll pursued Inn, with fatal re-
suits.
'9'' li' ''iat a ne was
,',''"7 - h.''7,. - so'ie lh.les ifo'a
1uoDa a lacked i, ',' ~. y se'y'n' ana morse
VIZ .a4;on ri "','iou' any real
+ .nob number, A., '..'.l5 y 0loN'ao round
- - 49, .a.ions '. ''' siu''l'n oe-
,.,'..,. sa,., ond fnain.. n '9''''''s several
''i"e'' - '',o iols7' 'oo' be
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-01-14
Somewhat Absent.M

speaking OF embarrassing episodes"
said real estate man, 81 unconsciously
aided and abetted in one the other day.
| went into one of the large downtown
lunch rooms with a friend who is a
connoisseur in the matter Of overcoats.
He wears good coat and he always re-.
moves THIS coat With care anu -nangs II
up with due reference to the turn Of the
collar. As he was in the act of hanging
up his coat he knocked mine down. and
STOPPING with apologies he caught mine
up and replaced it. My friend boasts
good deal Of his lf-possession under
trying circumstances, but as he put nv
coat in place he caught the eyes of two
lady acquaintances at distant table.
and removing his hat he made a most
elaborate bow. Then he absent minded
ly put his hat in the rack, and, forgetting
that he had already removed his over
coat, unbuttoned his cutaway, and before
| could interfere he stood before tho
fifty or sixty ladies and gentlemen
present in his shirt sleeves. There was
laugh at his expense, and he afterward
explained to me that he would not have
had it happen in the presence of those
ladies for thousand dollars. - Chicaqo
Inter Ocean,
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-01-14

"Glad Of what2 rctorted strong,
CHEEKY voice, and in came the mysteri-
Gus stranger himself. eWhy, Ideclare,
lie cried, if there isn't the little girl who
sold me the things to-day"
"Glad that you aie my cousin" said
Garry, with a mischievous smile aud
low courtesy. Bccause-becauso l
thought you were very pleasant and
kind"
"And thought said the stranger.
"But no, won't tell you what thought
How do you do cousnl'
81 am SO glad you chose the seal
brown silk" demurcly observed Garry.
What should 1have done with a blue or
pink silk"
1T would have looked very well on
you, "said the cousin meditatively cycling
her "blue would have matched your
eyes; pink, your checks"
Just my sentiments, chuckled Uncle
Wolsey. Come, young folks-come
tea is ready. And the toast is getting
cold"
Not until the visitor had taken his
leave did Uncle Wolsey, smoking his
pipe before the fire, impart to Garry an
additional piece Of news.
"What dye suppose Mr.. Lcnnox told
me lie came down to the States for,
Carry"
I'm sure l doIt know" said Carry
iunocently.
ITO get him a wifer' said Uncle VOL
sey.
"oh~ said Garry, shading her face
from the fire. lam sure l hope he
viii be successrulp
The three banged-hair young maidens
at Pckrelrs Emporium subscribed to
buy Bob mian glass cologne set for
Garry WaIlingford's wedding present;
but they murmured much among them
selves becau this golden stratum of
luck had not come to them,
"Wc're just as pretty as She" said
they; "and much prettier, some folks
would say. And why couldn't the Lcus-
toner have fallen to our lot?"
There are some questions which Cupid
aloe can answer. And he, the winged
rogue Is obstinately silent. -Helen Forest
Grnrcs
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-01-14

Horse bread is stitl commonly made in
Sweden. 1t is also commonly made and
used in Tyrol, and in certain parts of
Switzerland Engadine, for instance.
Your driver stops at a roads de inn, and,
before he buys anything for himself, he
Iuys for his horse a large cake Of brown
oat bread, circular, flattish, the size and
shape Of Yorkshire yule cake. The
strong, quiet steady horse-or mare very
likely-knows well what all this means;
looks on with eager eyes as he slices the
cake into strips; munches slice after slice
with keen enjoyment; and finally, per-
haps, lays its lips upon his palm, to sug-
gest the possibility OF another loaf. Some
drivers, indeed, themselves desirous Of
meal, are content to crumble the bread
into a trough; and in that case the horse
will not only cat all the larger pieces, but
will with teeth and tongue take up every
morsel and crumb that str9ws the floor Of
the trough. Such are his views as to the
merits Of oaten bread. Notes and QQer-
ice
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-01-14
A SENATOR'S Wig.

The bald head of Senator Foote of
Mississippi was frequently a mark for
the humu Of the United States Senate.
One day he seated himself smilingly at
bis desk. The house was electrified, for
a fine, curly, black wig covered his
nate. Uprose Mr.. Hale and demanded
n special committee to examine the Gre
dentials of the youthful upstart who
had assumed Senator Foote's likeness
and chair Senator Foote rose up, and
bowing politely, convulsod the Senate
by quickly removing the wig and hang
ING it on bis umbrella, with the obser-
vation with this motion on my part,
which is quite in order, despite my illus
trioas colleagues, the committee is not
necessary There was a round of APP
,-o,tca
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-01-14
A Remarkable Climate.

At point where the two ranges of the
Cordilleras, the eastern and western,
which traverse Peru from north to south.
meet, and form what is known as the
junction of Pasco Eel nulo dc Pasco) is
located the city Of Cerro de Pasco, 1856
miles from Lima It is built upon hon
cycombed foundations and possesses a
most remarkable climate by reason of its
great height above the sea level. From
December to March, a season which the
people of the Cerro term their winter,
whereas in reality it is their summer the
temperature during the day is from -
to 13 degrees above zero, at night it falls
to near zero, but the water seldom
freezes.
During this season the sun appears at
times, and from the purity of the atmos-
phere the heat caused by his rays is al
most unbearable. A person may be
standing partly in the shade; that por-
tion is disagreeably cold, while the part
exposed to the sun is uncomfortably
warm. 1t would be difficult to find
another locality where the atmospheric
changes are more distinctly marked =
~ 7. G1aphje
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-01-14
Poisoned by It's Nurses Cosmetic.

A case is recorded in a German medi.
cal Journal in which an infant was
nolsoael by the lead contained in cos
metic on the face of the nurse. The
ehild was five weeks old, and ,as con-
stantly crying and suffering with collie.
It's skin vas of dull buish tint. The
nurse bad long been in the habit Of using
a cosmetic which contained large pro-
norton Of lead. 1t is stated that upon
rem val Of the cause and appropriate
treatment cure was effected in few
davs.-Hsalth and Home.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-01-14
He Praised the Baby.

GLOW do you happen to be such a 'av-
orite of Mrs. Snapper, Jones7 l hear her
praising you highly, both for your good
sense and your politeness, whenever J
happen to be in company with her."
81 didn't know that was fayorite
of her."
"Well, you are"
81 don't know what l have done to de-
serveit, then. Oh, yesl Letme see. l was
visiting at her house few weeks ago
and called her baby beautiful little an
gel, and added that it was the very image
of its mother"
"Ah, that explains it."--Boston 0oa-
rier.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-01-14
The Law and the Profits.

Mrs. sumpkins oldest boy had gone
West, and friend of the family
was making some inquiries about him.
81 understand John is an Attorney"
he said.
eyes, and he got lots Of bust
ness" she answered, with mothers
pride.
rs he criminal lawyer3'
A shadow fellupon the good old lady's
face.
"No, not yet, she said. 'Leastways
be hain't told me. But I'm AFRAID he
will be. The law is % dreadful tempt
Rglf