Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-12-11
ABOUT ECCENTRIC CLERGYMEN
Specimens Gathered AT Rome and Abroad
whitfield and Other Ministers Less
Celebrated.

Chicago Hsrdd.
In 1856 q London minister preached
and printed q sermon entitled "a Most
Delectable Sweet Perfumed Nosegay for
Gods Saints to Smell At" while one OF
his contemporaries delivered himself OF
"A Fan to Drive Away the Flies of
Satan" One Rev. John Fry had
been seriously criticised for some mat
ter, whereupop he entitled a sermon
"A Pair of Bellows TO BLOW Away the
Dust Cast Upon John Fry" and at the
same time q canon of st. Pauls, not to be
rutdone, constructed "A Reaping Hook
Well Tempered for the Stubborn Ears Of
the Coming Crop; or, Biscuits Baked in the
Oven of Charity, Carefully Conserved for
the Chickens of the Church, the SparrOws
OF the Spirit and the Sweet Swallows Of
Salvation" Sir Humphrey Lind was Il
famous Puritan. A Jesuit priest preached
a sermon entitled "A Pair Of SPectacles
for Sir Humphrey Lind" to which that
person replied with "A Case for Sir Hum
phrey Lind's Spectacles.
Frederick Saunders has gathered with
his multitude of anecdotes innumerable
instances of pulpit peCuliarities. He Is
quite the historian of the curious and the
quaint. Others have labored in the same
field, and the current newspapers are occa-
s~ionally the recorders OF almost unmatched
righteousness,
Whitetield, for example, once gave out
as his text: Then came unto Him certain
lawyers" and then apparently detecting
his purposed misquotation, said: Not
certain lawyers, but q certain lawyer. 1t
was wonderful that even n lawyer should
have been found 10 do this, and it would
have been perfectly incredible had there
been more" he said, 1.-THE point lying in
the fact that a number OF lawyers we're in
the congregation who mad come to scott and
laugh at him.
Saunders tells of e Shrewsbury minister
who preached q funeral sermon for Rev.
John Angel James from the three texts:
"a man sent from God whose name was
John" 81 saw an angel fly in the midst OF
Heaven" James, the servant OF God
DIR. Williamson once had a quarrel with
a parshioner pamed Hardy. The next
Sunday be preached from the text, There
is no fool like the foolhardy."
Rev. DIR. Adams and Rev. DR.. Low were
rival candidates for q living. They were
both present on a Sunday, the one preach
ing In the morning and the other in the
evening. In the morning Mr.. Lows text
was, Adam, Where art Thou!' and in
the evening his rival announced, "LO,
here am ~
When DIR. Mountain was q candidate for
a vacant bishOpric he preached before
Charles ii. on the text, "If thou hadSt
faith as grain of mustard seed, and said
unto this mountain, BE thou removed aud
east into the midst Of the sea- 1t should be
done
Saunders has a story of DIR. Bra1en
when be was rector of Ethan, IN Kent,
who one day preached from the text,
''Who art thou?" Just at the moment he
announced il a military subaltern Of the
neighboring post was walking up the aisle,
and hearing the question he stopped, salu-
ted and said: ~ am, sir, an officer of the
Seventeenth Regiment Of Foot on a re-
c|Fuiting party here"
Every one has heard the story of the
Scotch dominic who was in the habit OF
writing the heads of his discourses on small
slips of paper which he laid for convenience
Oh the Bible in front Of him. One day he
was preaching with unusual JUNCTION, and,
pounding the Bible he knocked his paper
on the floor. Be it remembered that any
thing like a written sermon is still, as al
ways, very unpopular among the Scotch.
The minister wound up his second point,
aud, hopping his perspiring brow, said:
Thirdly, my brethren" and he looked
down at his paper. Thirdly" he said
after a moment. Thirdly" looking
wildly around. Thirdly, / say, my
brethren" But he could get no further.
Just then old Scotch Jennie Geddes rose
up in a pew before him and said: film
nae mistaken, minister, / saw thirdly fee
out at the east window q quarter of an
hour syne."
Perhaps as ready 8 tact as wal ever dis
played in the pulpit Was on the part of a
minister, who became the lifelong chap
lain of Frederick the Great. He chose to
decide between q number of applicants by
the way in which they should deliver an
extempore sermon, the text to be handed
them in sealed envelope as they entered
the pulpit. Sunday came, and, after
prayer, one Of the Kings aides presented
the minister with a sealed envelope. He
opened it and found it blank. He held MP
one side and said: my brethren, here is
nothing" Then, holding ND the other
side, he said: And here is nothing; and