Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-02-27
BILL NYE
TELLS HOW HE SEARCHED Fer A BARBER.
Unprecedented Testimony as 10 Williams Bravery
His Discovery Of a Tall Brunette Or
phan Of IS, Whlss Assistants Drove
The testers 10 Fail Boards.

| I first came here | began TO east about me
for n good, fluent barber, with whom l
could associate during the winter; one who
would not be ashamed to be seen convers-
ing with me, and, still, withal, a man who
could administer a clean shave without
pain.
| fell into the hands of a tall brunette
orphan about % years of age, named Plum
Levy-pronounced Levi. Everybody said
that Plum was a good haircutter, and, very
likely, q good shaver. too. 1t was even
reported that people came here frequently
from New York to get their hair trimmed.
The first time | visited the shop Plum
wasn't there personally. | took the chair
of an assistant. 1t Wa a very disagreeable
chair, with caked places i'll it. 1t was up
holstered with body brussels, and the seat
had bones in il. The room is heated by
means of a fireplace, and the water for
shaving is boiled in a saucepan on the
Goals. The assistant was a perfect gentle
man, though. He did everything he could
in a social way to make me forget my
troubles. For half an hour he ust simply
dazZled me with his conversational pow
ers, and threw every influence about me
10 make me contented. He told me so
much about the country and its
that when he got through with me | wrung
his hand with wet eyes. This may seem
10 be a physical impossibility, but | did it.
For som time after that | decided not
to shave any more. My beard is ginger
colored with a dash of red in it; but 9TH
ers have risen TO afluence and Won a death
less name who wore this kind of beard, so
| thought | would let it grow and thus be
able TO horrify my children into n more
thorough state of discipline than / am now
able to maintain. Now and then / would
90 into the shop, however, hoping that
Plum might be there, and in that case
would have one more old fashioned shave
before | abandoned myself to the wild and
woolly depths of a tough, red beard; hut
Mr.. Levy was engaged in Building a wing
on his house, and so | would inhale q little
smoke from the fire place and go away.
Later on | decided that | would give the
other assistant Il hack at my beard. He
looked like a likely young man whose par
ents were dependent on him, so one day |
got into his chair.
His chair was not so hard to sit in as the
first one, but it had q very feverish breath
and the head rest occasionally slippad 4
cog and fell about 4 inches, like the cellar
door of a gibbet. / stood this until | got
shaved down to q line even with the angle
of the jaw, and then | said / did not care
about having my throat whiskers shaved
off. I paid my reckoning and went away
with a red tippet of ginger colored plush
around the suburbs of my neck like a mid
dle-agcd Mormon on his way to the endow-
ment house.
In two weeks a man who claimed to be
friendly to my interests came to me and in
a hOarse voice informed me that Plum. Levy
was at work in the shop.
l went there at a rapid rate. In the
corner near the chair, with a blue fly net
ON it, stood 4 tall gentleman of African
descent. He smiled pleasantly on me
through a pair ofirOn. bound S~pectacles and
and told me in a naughty manner to be
seated. sprang gayly into his old red
chair, knocking out the dust and hair Of
forgotten generations, and Plum Levy ran
his skinny black fingers over the desOlated
site of my once hair. 1t did not take him
long to decide that il was doubtless n shave
that | desired. like to meet Il man, he
he white or black, who can Jump at a o n
ClusiOn that way with the utmost agility
and always hit it right.
He got some hot water ont of the sauce
pan, slashed his brush around in it, bank
ed up my nOstrIls with lather. and when |
had to open my mouth in order to get a
place to breath through, he stabbed that
full of the most upalatable sOapsuds | ever
ate.
He then paused, in order to try on my
eyeglasses, which had deposited on the
sink. Evidently they did not fit HIM, for
he resumed his own with a sigh. All this
he did with the utmost freedom.
can imagine how such a man would
act when he got a chance at emancipation.
Wouldn't be gorge himself? Wouldn't he
like to get away into the woods somewhere
by the side of a car load OF freedom aud
Just kind Of founder himself? | wOt so.
He picked ont Il razor with a white
handle, such rs agricultural papers offer to
boys for one new name, and he moved
around over my fluffy cheek, turning my
head over so that the midday sun could
shine into my works, until | mOaned in q
low key in spite Of myself. Oh, how /
wanted to go home! How | begged to see
my family once more! How | told Mr..
Levy that I knew | had done wrong, and
that / had written things about the South
ern climate that were too severe, and that
i'll had my life to live over again | would
not do so. but, oh, would he not give me
one more chance to refOrmP Would he not
let me look once more upon the faces OF
my wife and children before he cut upon
the other side of my neck?
At last he relented, and ] went to the
Office of physician.
MY friends who recommended Mr.. Levy
now get out of it by stating that they sup
posed / wanted my hair cut. They say
they never claimed hat Plum Levy could
shave for sour apples, but he can just more
than cut hair. BILL NYE.