Butler citizen. [volume] (Butler, Pa.) 1877-1922, 1887-04-22
How it Fooled Captain Peter
MugginS.

ANY unfortunate being who ever
attempted to smuggle anything from
the Continent, and fell Into the hands
of Captain Peter Muggins of her
British Majesty's Customs, on land
ing at Dover, never forgot the cir
cumstance.
The Captain Yves the one to vindi'
cate the honor of the said British
Majesty. He was a short, stout, red
faced, well-fed and exceedingly i'll
tempered son of Mars. His martial
tread and loud voiced oaths did not
convey the idea OF carpet knight,
yet he had never faced the foe nor
Sought the bubble reputation at the
cannon's mouth" No, he had con-
tented himself with filling the
Queens Tobacco pipe" as the kiln
where contraband goods were form.
erly burned was somewhat profanely
styled.
The Captain was prepared to "ix'
any one who carried ashore one cigar
or one inch Of lace, pair of gloves
or any other item.
AS he stood thus, watching the
coming ashore Of the passengers with
"stony British stare" he espied a
lady who walked with the gentle, ap-
pealing, uncertain step of a young
widow.
She was followed by nurse, wear.
ing the cap and apron of French
bonnie; and in the arms of this nurse
was baby, in long flowing white
robes
The Captain was on the alert.
The lady came up to him and
throwing back her long Grape veil, ad
dressed him in deep, musical ac
cents:
"You are the custom officer, sir p
II am" responded the Captain,
rather gruffly.
Now, the widow was sufficiently
beautiful to disarm even the ill-nature
of Captain Muggins, and just the
style of beauty he would be sure tc
admire.
The widow was beautiful, with
clear, brown eye-or. rather two O
them-yelvet.lidded heavy fringed
full and languid prone to be cast down
modestly and upraised suddenly, to
the no small confusion of the luckless
male bystander.
She wore the full attire of woe. A
small Grape bonnet, with slight
frostwork of white under its brm
rested on her glossy black hair
Such hair waving, and shining
and blue-black.
Her brow, so smooth and broad
undisfgured by lunatic fringe OF
bang Her eyebrows were black and
delicate, but not straight, nor arched
Her nose might be trifle large, but
it was beautifully formed and clearly
chiseled; and her mouth was beauti
full, the lips SO full, so heartlike, in
their proud arch, the coloring so fresh
ard rich.
Then her complexion was of soft,
ruddy, indescrbable brunette tint, i'm
possible to picture in words, but
wholly charming; her chin was 80
finely moulded, and her throat full
aud round.
Altogether, the irascible Captain
thought, "The finest woman pve
seen for years !" For the widows
form folly equalled her face, and she
was handsomely dressed.
81 am, madame" he repeated
"Where is your luggage ?"
"Here it is. am alone-that is
with the exception Of my nurse ant
baby. | have to travel SO much now
and always alone"
Tears seemed very close to tht
widows lovely eyes, and a mourn
fully appealing tone touched even The
ironclad heart Of Captain Muggins.
"All right, ma'am. Have nothing
to declare, | suppose Z"
Nothing. Please examine my
trunks, for long to rest, and m,
baby has been quite ea-sick, poo
darling"
The trunks were examined care
fully, for, however fine woman th
widow might be, duty before senti
ment" was the Captains motto.
Nothing was found, and the trunk
were passed.
The widow took the baby from th