davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1887-07-13
He Was a Good Listener.

The Kentuckians tell a good story Of
eI-Gov. Magoffin. of that state, who is
good talker and likes to do most OF
the talking himself. One day. in max
ing the journey from Cincinnati to Lex
ington, he shared his seat in the car
with bright-eyed. pleasant faced gen.
tleman: The governor, after a few
commonplace remarks, to which his
companion nodded and smiled assent,
branched into a description of the
scenes that he had witnessed in differ
ent parts of the country, grew eloquent
over the war, described with glowing
speech the horse races he had witnessed.
talked learnedly of breeding, and told
thrilling stories of his battles with the
Indians in the northwest The hours
slipped rapidly away. and when the
train was nearing Lexington the two
exchanged cards and parted with .
cordial shake of the hands. The gov
ernor drove to an inn, and to a number
of friends he remarked that the time
had never seemed so short before.
Then you must have had pleasant
company aboard"
1ou are rlSht- L met a gentleman
of unusual intelligence. We conyersed
all the way over. never was
brought a contact with more agree
able man"
..Indeedi Who was he?' asked his
friends.
..Wait minute; have his card, "
and the governor felt in his pocket, and
produced bit of pasteboard. "His
name is King"
mot Bob King?" shouted dozen in
one breath.
..Yes. gentleman; Robert King-thai
is the way the card reads" was the
proud reply.
A roar of laughter followed.
"Why, governor, Bob King is as deaf
as post He was born deaf and dumb =
-Bosfon Budget.
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1887-07-13
Astor and Vanderbilt in Arkansas.

The rural idea of the manner In
which the Astors and Vanderbilts live
is amusing. and will doubtless be
highly flattering TO the persons nam
ed. A man travelling "down in Ar
kansas" heard two old women talking
before a cabin door. One of them.
with clay pipe between her lips,
said:
at do beat all how some folkses has
ev'rything a mortal body could ase
fer. while others, like you an me. Mis-
Peterby, is poorer'n Jobs turkey all
the born days of our lives. Now.
you've heern tell of them Vanderbilts
and Astors there in New York, ant
youg'
Dunno but have" said Miss Pc
terby.
We'll. I've lately heern some things
bout how they carry on. My man he
got it straight from Zimri Perkins.
and Zim he got il from his wife's
mothers uncle's nevvy, who takes
paper printed in New York. so it must
be true"
Il ant a doubt of it.
well, if you'll b1eeve me, old Mis-
Vanderbilt don't purtend to even wash
her own dishes. She don't even make
her own bed-her nor Mis- Astor nei-
ther, and they both sleep in pink vel
vet nightgowns trimmed in lace worth
81, 900 a yard and embroidered in dia-
mints that cost millions on millions"
1.-The good land!"
''Yes, siri An Mis- Astor's bed std
is solid gold with dammit knobs on it
big as goose eggs, an every time she
goes out she has twenty coal black
horses hitched up 10 her solid gold
charyot, an she stands up In it, dress
ed all in white satin. with her hair
hangin' down her back. a-throwin $50
gold pieces to the beggars"
"FawV
"Deed an it's true-every word of
it. An when Mr. and Mis- Wander
bilt goes out they have their carriage
drawn by forty milk-white steeds.
with coal-blaek nigger with dia-
mint ring in his nose leading ev'ry
horse; an Vanderbilt he lays back on
his velvet cushions smokin' golden
pipe"
''You don't mean iti'
II do that. Oh, / tell you it's q
fine thing to be rich, Mis- Peterby; an
l reckon alike as not you an med
carry on Jest like that IL we only had
the means to do il with"
Like enutf-like enuff. Anyhow, L
know I'd have me good green and
red gingham gown an all the salt
mack'rel could eat for once"
"An' I'd git me some ginyuine
Scotch snuff, / would. "-BoSton Cour-
Ter.
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1887-07-13
Bloodthirstiness as a Human In
stinct.

As Rochefoucauld says, there is
something in the misfortunes of our
very friends that does not altogether
displease us; and an apostle of peace
will feel a certain vicious thrill run
through him, and enjoy vicarious
brutality, as he turns to the column
in his newspaper at the top of which
shocking atrocity" stands printed in
large capitals. See how the crowd
flocks round the street-brawl! Con-
slider the enormous annual sale of re-
volvers to persons, not one in thou
sand of whom has any serious inten-
ton of using them, but of whom each
one has his carnivorous self-conscious-
ness agreeably tickled at the notion.
as he clutches the handle of his wea-
pom, that he will be rather a danger
Gus customer to meet. See the igno-
BILE crew that escorts every great pu-
gilist-parasites who feel as though
the glory of his brutality rubbed off
upon them, and whose darling hope,
from day TO day, is to arrange some
set-to of which they may share the
rapture without enduring the pains.
The first blows at prize-fght are apt
to make a refined spectator sick; but
party, and it will then seem as if the
other fellow could not be banged and
pounded and mangled enough-the re-
fined spectator would like to reen-
force the blows himself Over the
sinister orgies of blood of certain de-
praved and insane persons let a cur
tain be drawn, as well as over the fe-
rocity with which otherwise fairly de-
cent men may be animated, when (at
the sacking of town, for instance),
the excitement of victory long de-
layed, the sudden freedom of rapine
and of lust, the contagion of crowd,
and the impulse to initiate and outdo,
all combine to swell the blind drunk
enness of the killing-instinct, and car
ry it to its extreme. No! those who
try to account for this from above
downward, as if it resulted from the
consequence of the victory being rap
idly inferred, and from the agreeable
sentiments associated with them in the
imagination, have missed the root of
the matter. Our ferocity is blind, and
can only be explained from belos0.
Could we trace it back through our
line of descent, we should see it taking
more and more the form of fatal re-
fiex response, and at the same time be-
coming more and more the pure and
direct emotion that it is.-PrOf. WtH-
lam James, in Popular Science
Monthly.
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1887-07-13

Let other men wrangle and strive,
And struggle, and scheme, and contrive.
For me tits discreeter, and meeter, and
sweeter to sit on the fence by myself !;
/ know that the scorn OF the world
At my meaningless mean will be hurled,
But / have NO measure, or leisure, or
pleasure to struggle for power or peif.
There are fellows whose greatest delight
Is to hunt for the midst of fight,
And lostle and shoulder the older and
bolder and knock out the timid and
slim;
SO If |, OF a peace-loving mind,
To roost on the fence am inclined,
Small odds if they hiss me, or kiss me, or
miss ne, for keeping up out of the
swim.
II ever 90 to the war,
lli go in the medical corps,
And then while they're fighting, and hit-
ing, and shifting, and shedding bad
language and gore,
1ll turn from the strife abhor.
Both sides of the field I'll explore,
Where the wounded are creeping, and
sleeping, snd weeping,
Sweet balm in their hurts will pour.
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1887-07-13
General Lee I'm The Wilderness Cam
paign.

From an illustrated description from
the Wilderness to Cold Harbor, in the
Century, we quote as follows. General
Lee held so completely the admiration
and confidence of his men that his con-
duct of campaign was rarely criti-
cszed. Few points present themselves
in his campaign from the Wilderness
to Cold Harbor upon which criticism
can lay hold, when all the circum-
stances are considered. His plan of
striking the flank of Grants army as il
passed through the Wilderness is above
criticism. Fault can be found only
with its execution. The two divisions
of Longstreet at GordonsviIle, and
Anderson's division of Hills corps left
on the Upper Rapidan, were too widely
separated from the rest of the army,
and, as the event proved, should have
been in supporting distance of A. Z.
Hill on the Orange Plank road on the
afternoon of the 5th Of May. That he
did not strike Grant damaging blow
when he had him at such disadvantage
on the North Anna may seem strange to
those who had witnessed his bold
aggressiveness at the Wilderness and
on other fields. He was i'll and con-
fined to his tent at the time; but, as
showing his purpose he had been able
to keep the saddle, he was heard TO
say, as he lay prostrated by sickness,
We must strike them blow; we must
never let them pass US again What
ever General Lee did, his men thought
it the best that could be done under
the circumstances. Their feeling
towards him is well illustrated by the
remark of a ragged rebel who took of
his hat to the general as he was pass
ing and received like courteous salute
in return: '%God bless Marse Roberti
| wish he was emperor of this country
and | was his carriage-driver.W
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1887-07-13
Couldn't Fool Uncle Peter.

Countryman-"Tha feller in the
telegraph Office up there thought he
was mighty smart but fooled him."
Policeman-"You did? How?"
..Oh, easy enough. You see 1 went
in there yesterday to send a message
to St. Louis, and told him what l
wanted. All right says he; rs
cents" So paid him the rs cents,
and I'll be darned if he did thing
but rap that old brass clicker of his
fifteen or twenty times and then hang
the message on a hook"
"Well, do You call that fooling
him?"
you just hold on and I'll tell you.
To-day / wanted to send another mes
sage to ST. Louis, but I'll be gosh
darned if / wanted to pay another rs
cents. So l went up to the Office
kinder politely, an sez /, Mister,
say /. there's young lady outside as
says she wants to speak to you I'll
tend office for you while you're gone
Well, sir. he bit right away. OFF he
went in = hurry. and before he got
back had plenty of time to clink his
old brass machine all l wanted and
hang my message on the hook just as
he did the day before know they
got it, too. at the other end, for the
minute / got through the old machine
went to clicking like blue blazes. 5
much 3 to say: All right. old man,
we hear YOU Oh, fooled him good,
l did. Your Uncle Peter lives in Way
back; but he amt no fool, he amt;
not by long chalk; no street
S0Uerviile Journal.
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1887-07-13
A Talk About Discounts.

"a funny thing about country
merchants" said commercial travel
er, lis their inability to understand the
discount business correctly. You know
a good deal of business is done nova
days from a standard price list, with
discounts which fluctuate as the market
changes. Sometimes the discount is
simply or 10 off, and sometimes it is a
sort of double discount, 10 or Is being
the regular scale discount, which, of
course, is granted by the salesman, who
is also allowed by his house to add a
further discount, as the circumstances
may warrant. In this way has sprung
up the custom of giving such discounts
as 10 and ), or 30 and 30 and so on
OF course our customers always hang
out for as big discount as they can
get, but not one in five of them under
stands the true secret of discount figur-
ing. They nearly all want the big dis
court first. For instance, if | say to a
man: You can have those goods with
20 and 80 off, he is likely to reply,
make it 80 and 20 off and I'll take 'em.
His idea, you see, is that with the big
discount figured first he gets a greater
reduction, but in fact it comes out just
the same. Twenty per cent off a hun
dred leaves 80, and 80 per cent off that
leaves So. Now work it the other way:
Thirty per cent off 100 leaves 20, and
20 per cent off 20 leaves sc. See? 1t
works just the same with any discounts
like that. Take 80 and 5 off, or and
80 Off the remainder is the same-l9.
Why. the other day customer of
mine out In Missouri thought he was
such smart figurer that when offered
him and twenty off, he said if I'd give
him 20 and 5 off he'd pay cash instead
of ninety days. OF course | accepted
his offer. Once in while, but not of
ten. you'll run across a man who pre-
fers 80 and l5 off to simple AS per
cent discount Chicago Herald.
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1887-07-13

and the injury is not materially great.
The remedy is cutting away at the first
appearance
Apple blight, like the dreaded fire
blight, is serious disease. It attacks a
whole branch or limb, and sometimes half
OF the top is destroyed befoee the disease
becomes apparent to an ordinary observer
Again, there Is no remedy except 70 cut
away the diseased portions and burn
them up.
Pear leaf blight is a sort of rust that
appears on the leaves during July and
August, first in small brown spots. These
spread rapidly over the leaves until their
growth is stopped To avoid the evil ef-
fects OF leaf blight the great point is 70 get
rapid, vigorous growth before mid
summer
Many readers VIII doubtless be disap-
pointed because a long list of remedies
has not been given for the blight. such as
are advised from year to year by many
writers. These have been avoided simply
because there is but one sure renedy-the
heroic one already recommendations
away the diseased parts and destroying
them by fire
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1887-07-13
Gofio: the Food OF the Canary Is
IandarS

l have alluded to the excel
lent bodily development and proper
tons of the modern Canarians, and to
the testimony left BY the old ehron-
iclers TO the still fine characteristics
of the ancient Guanches. who are in
deed described as maryels of bodily
strength, beauty, and agility. because
these facts have an important bearing
on the question of their food. As
there can be no such bodily growth,
strength, and activity, as is described
as belonging to these people. without
superior nourishment, it follows that
the food used by the Guanches. and
adopted and still almost exclusively
used by the present inhabitants, must
be highly nutritious.
This article, SO evidently important.
is the gofio, named at the head of this
paper. There is nothing mysterious
about it, for gofio is simply flour made
from any of the cereals by parching
or roasting before grinding. The Gu
anches may have roasted their wheat,
barley, etc, by the ready method Of
first heating stones. on which or
among which the grain was afterwari
placed. As To that there are no pre-
else accounts, but well-shaped grind
stones are plentifully preserved At
present gofio is prepared by roasting
the grain in a broad, shallow earthen
dish, over charcoal-fire 1t is kept
constantly stirred, TO prevent burn
ing. One can hardly pass through a
village or hamlet without witnessing
some stage of the preparation of GO
no. The grain is first carefully picked
over and all impurities removed. The
process frequently takes place in front
of or just within the always-open
door, giving the traveller ample OPP
portunity to see all steps of the prep
aration. The grinding is done at the
wind-mills, which abound everywhere.
The roasted grain is ground to very
fine flour, when it becomes gofio At
ter grinding it is ready for Immediate
use. When il is to be eaten, milk,
soup, or any suitable fluid, may be
mixed with it-anything, in fact, to
give il sufficient consistency to be con-
veyed into the mouth. Being already
cooked ii requires no other prepara-
ton before eating.
Ultimately maize was introduced
into the islands, and soon became an
article of general cultivation, partic-
ularly on the Island of Grand Canary,
where gofio from it is the staple article
of food for the laboring population, rs
that from wheat or wheat mixed with
maize is in Teneriffe, wheat being
more largely grown in the latter is
land-C. Fdyette Taylor. in Popular
Science Monthly
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1887-07-13
The Cowboy as He is.

The cowboys have-to use their own
selves, writes George Anderson in
the Tomah (WiS) Etaterprise Time
was, and not SO very long ago either.
that when the cowboys received their
pay after the roundup" they felt in
duty bound 10 go to Miles City and
elbow it in" at the gambling dens, sa-
looms, and other disreputable places.
'Cow-punching" is at best very
tough business. and full of risks TO life
and limb; the pay is small and by no
means adequate. and after the ''round-
up" there follows long period of en-
forced idleness, during which they are
given food and lodging only by the
ranch owner. The average cowboy
was wont to turn up after his semi
annual spree with very large head
and not cent in his pocket OF late.
however, the boys have. as have said,
taken a tumble To themselves and are
saving their money. So common has
the commercial spirit become among
them that Miles City has seen this year
the quietest season in its history.
Most of the cowboys look upon their
coming to Montana to herd cattle as
the mistake of their lives. The glow
ing stories of thrilling adventure and
sudden wealth of the cowboys life
which are common in the east are in
most cases responsible for their enter
ing the guild, but the reality is quite
different matter. Many of the ecomo-
mical ones have been enabled by their
savings to return to their eastern homes
People who have not been through
the bad lands can have but faint con-
ception of the utter desolation and
worthlessness of the COWBOYS home
He is roasted in summer and frozen in
winter. The lands can never be used
for anything but grazing. and the dis
tances are therefore something inn
mense. One peculiarity of the coun-
try makes rapid riding very difficult,
not to say dangerous, undertaking.
The earth is so friable that a tiny water
course will speedily cut for itself
deep gully, or ''coolie," as it is called,
the depth of which when filled with
snow is entirely, problematical. A
horseman who rides with cowboys
recklessness may suddenly find himself
at the bottom of a six or eight foot
coolie with his horse on top of him,
and no way of getting out-if he hap
pen to be still alive-save tunneling up
to the head of the stream through the
snow. Then one of your broncho's
feet is as likely as not to sink suddenly
two feet down into a coyotes hole
when he is going at a furious pace.
Result: His leg snaps off like pipe
stem, and you are shot through the air
to point far beyond and picked up
more dead than alive. The water is
generally bitter with alkali and
scorches your throat as you swallow
it; there is little to eat, and that is
hard to get.
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1887-07-13

Fire blight of the pear, the apple,
ounce, ETC., is one of the most formida-
BILE diseases to which fruit trees are liable.
Scientists differ in their opinions as 70
whether 1t is caused by the sun, the at
mosphere or an insect. 1t attacks the
trees at different periods Of the growing
season from June to September, and gen.
orally in the young parts first; the leaves
flag, the sap becomes thick and brown,
oozing ont in globules through the bark,
and has something of a very disagreeaoie
odor, and the diseased branch or part
turns black, as IL it were burned by nre.
When the pear tree Is attacked II Is din-
cult to save 1t, the disease spreads 80 rap
idly, In apple and ounce It Is less tatal, -
rarely killing more than portion OF the
tree
Authorities differ as widely In their
treatment of fire blight as scientists do IN
ascribing the cause Of the disease. me
only effective and trustworthy treatment
In our opinion. Ia to cut away the very
day the disease Is discovered the blight
parts into the sound wood, where there -
not the slightest trace Of disease; burn up
Immediately all the diseased portions cut
of. As high authority as p. Barry says:
'sThe only remedy for fire blight Is 70 cut
Instantly the blighted parts into the
healthy wood and burn them mp imme-
diately.n Charles Downing said: Wnen
the disease has actually appeared the oniy
remedy seems to be the knife and the saw,
most vigorously applied, TO eradlcaes
every symptom of diseased and discoloreo
bark or wood II you would save youx
tree, cut at once on the nrst appaEens
symptom Of the disease, and be suro yoo
cut it clean ont. y
Twig blight attacks the young shoots Q
the current seasons growth ana GU
these to wither and became brown g cI.-ll
IN midsummer. The cauee y unknown
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1887-07-13
St. Anthony's Sermons.
AN OLD LEGEND AxpLIT1Ep.

Saint Anthony preached to the Priory throng
Saint Anthonys sermons were terribly long
So dreary, SO weary, so learnedly deep
That all the Brothers were soon fast asleep,
He sighed as he looked at them, placid and
still,
For he loved his own sermons, as some peo-
pie Will
He stood on the brink and his sermon began.
But fish are no fonder OF sermons than man
So he girt up his cassock, Quoth he II must
80
To see If They'll listen TO me down below"
That night as the monk in refectory sat
They wondered and asked what the saint
could be at,
When a young brother said as he bent Ger
his dish:
HE has gone to the river TO preach to the
fish,"
So down to the river they started in quest,
And peered through the water with curious
Zest,
Till they spied in the bed of the river below
The saint and the fish sitting row upon row
And tbs said ever since that historical night
Not a fish in that stream can be tempted TO
bite;
The reasons as plain as the waters are deep
Saint Anthony's sermons have sent them TO
sleep.
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1887-07-13
An 1nducemens to Early Marriage.

Constance is very young. but she is
also better worth quoting than most
grown people. Her envy was some
what aroused by the fact that q we'd
ding was about to take place in the
family of her little playmate, and that
the playmate thereby had the advant-
age of her; so she remarked, very COM
placently. to her little friends mamma:
Mrs. -, did you know that was
engaged to be married."
why, no, Conny. Is that SOP"
"Yes, ma'am; I'm engaged to Fritz
Ware" (small boy of her acquaintance).
HE doesn't know 1t. but I've got to ex-
plain it to him"
We'll. Conny. do You expect to be
married soong
well. hope so. The fact is TIM
tired Of being spGnked. and l think
wen be married very soon. Hdrper's
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1887-07-13
At Her Own Expense.

A New York girl visiting recently in
Philadelphia was taken to the opera by
a young man, and at the close of the
performance was asked to partake of
some slight refreshment in the way of
supper. She accepted the invitation.
and at the close of the repast, was
somewhat astonished to see her escort
reach for her pocketbook, which lay
on the table at her side, and coolly pay
the bill out of her money. This, it
seems, is customary in Philadelphia
when a young gentleman's means are
somewhat limited 1t relieves his
lady friends of the embarrassment they
might otherwise feel on partaking of
any entertainment at his cost II
struck the New York girl, however, as
being very ridiculous, and she began
TO laugh. II fear you are laughing at
my expense" said the young man.
Let me explain" .sOh. ne" she re-
piled. Il was laughing at my expenser
- Independent.
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1887-07-13

A twenty-three foot vein OF what prom
ises to be valuable kind of fuel has been
discovered at Elsinore, Cal, and 1t is
thought that the whole valley Is under
laid with it. 1t is described by The News
of that place as quite soft, and easily
worked when in the mine, but 1t gets hard
when exposed to the air. 1t resembles
slate somewhat In appearance, although OF
4 somewhat lighter color. Ii Is clean,
leaves no marks or stains on the hand,
does not slack or crumble in the air, can
he split like mica into very thin hbers,
burns freely, and needs only to be ignited
with match, smells like burning rubber
when being consumed, and leaves behind
let black ash resembling lamphlack In
ali its properties 1t Is said to be worth
SIS per ton for making gas.-New York