The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1887-10-06

best knows now 10 Hnu Out.--oP5Nsy-
field Union. --s.s-..s-sss-as-s.a--
Some men vas always like der key
hole on der back of clock. They vas
behint time.-Ne,o Age.
Never rashly precipitate yourself
into position you may find through
maturer experience you are unfit to fill.
s-Flippancy is a spurious form OF
wit that is made to do service for the
real article in this country. Mobile
Register. aA -
There are two things which man
is bound to take ON faith-his wife's
private opinion of him and what sau-
sages are made of. as8
The cares which are the keys of
riches hang often so heavily at the rich
mans girdle that they clog him with
weary days and restless nights. when
others sleep quiet,y.--LzGaE Walton.
II do believe" said lawyer.
glancing at his opponent, ''that my
| learned friend has been inoculated with
stupidity" perhaps so; but the gem
eral belief is that you have it in the
natural way" retorted the learned
friend.-M r Ledger.
Mrs. Young Ito friend seeking one
dollar for aid society)-"I can't afford
to give you much, for / have large
family to support" Friend-.'Why,
you are just married." Mrs. Young
"Yes, but our servant has mother and
| eight children depending on her for
food. "-Judge.
The Picnicker. :
| Every picnicker hates,
With hatred intense,
The man who put up
That barbed wire fence.
-WGshinqton Critic.
First Omaha Girl-.Dear me! the
paper says Miss Ramsey, girl of
twenty, who goes to Cambridge Uni
versity, beat all the male students at
the recent examinations. Second
Omaha Girl-"Well, well! Took all
the prizesp' .'I suppose So" Poor
girl! She must be terribly homely to
be so smart"
In climbing the ladder Of fame,
my son. you must not look for unmixed
pleasure; the man just above you will
be continually treading on your fingers,
but then you have the satisfaction Of
stepping on the fingers of the fellow
| just beneath you. 1t is only he who is
|. at the foot of the ladder whose state is
wholly unblessed.
Cant somebody stop that run
awayp' yelled stranger in Detroit,
excitedly, as cab came tearing down
the street at break-neck speed. driver
and passenger both apparently frantic
with terror THAT amt no runaway"
said an old resident carclessly; ''it's
the umpire getting away from the base
ball rounds. The boys must have got
beat. Indianapolis Sentinel
Stranger Cat ticket Office window
when does the next train West
startp'' Unintelligible grunt by ticket
, agent. "Is it through-train or way.
train?" Grunt. young man, am
the new superintendent of this road
} and am delighted with the evidence
, you give Of long experience in youl
posltiOn; your saiary snail DO faiseu D.
: once. Omaha World.
Omaha politician-"What did you
: buy that thing for?" His Wife-"rhis
my dear. is a necktie, and I want yo,
to wear it, .What? Wear neckti,
and let my constituents get the idea
. feel myself above them. Woman, If 70,
had your way I'd be ruined" "But
r we are going off on visit, you know. :
, 20, well, hide it in a satchei until w
/ get into the cars, then I'll put it on. =
: Omaha World.
3 Omaha Dame-"Don't you think |
= is about time the title lady were be
a slowed only where it belongsT Omahi
9 Philosopher-"I certainly do, madam
: No word in the language is SO mis-
a used" II am glad we agree SO well
g Now if you would only give clear ant
: comprehensive definition of the term
o will do my share toward making
r public "A lady, madam, is huma
r being of the feminine gender who is no
5 afraid to be called a woman. - Onsdh
4 World.