Madison times. (Tallulah, Madison Parish, La.) 1884-1???, 1887-12-31
TERMS--S2 90 PER YEAR.
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS.

As choice of evils, a well behaved
blizzard beats winter fog Chicago
Herald.
A total abstinence preacher should
not keep his sermons in barrel
NeU orleans Picayule.
The man who ''builded better than
he knew was not New York con-
tractor.-LoICcI Courier.
A bride is always becoming to
Boniface, and bonny face is always
becoming to a brde.-AoteL Nal.
The English Government want good
men to defend its coercion policy. No
Irish need apply.-LoweH Citizen.
The Duke of Marlborough is in
Chicago. That borough is enough like
him to be his cousin.-Sdn Francisco
| Alta.
If all the glass factories shut down
we shall have to be careful of our beer
| glasses for some time to come. Boston
Post.
Tight money!" murmured the un-
fortunate in the police court as he paid
the usual fine and costs.-BOston
Bulletin.
"Does your husband swear as much as
ever?' Swear! Why. | can't keep
parrot two weeks in the house.
IOWH Topics.
The older q man gets the more diff
cult it is to pull the wool over his eyes.
He has good deal less wool, you
know.-YOntCrS Statesman.
The carpenter is an unreasonable
fellow. He objects TO plain board.
and yet he don't ike board until it
is planned DmSUille Breeze.
Flossie came home from the park
in a state of mind, Mama" she
said, 81 saw team OF horses in the park
what had their bustlcs cut oil. "-Ne0
York sun
The man who was told to keep watch
and ward over his friends chattlS, did
keep the watch and then warred
against being arrested for it White
hall Times.
Eastern railroad companies should
, revise their passenger tariffs at once
, so as to make slight distinction be-
tween the quick and the dead.-Duluth
PardgrGpher.
A lamp has more sense than some
people. II it is in room where
there are two souls with but marri-
ed thought it invariably goes out
: YonkerS Statesman
, What at the beginning may have
q been regarded merely as Il side issue
/ frequently turns out TO be the most inn
portant subject. 1t was SO in the case
i of EyA.-Picdyune.
n They say over in London that GoulC
is little, but, like most little people
J, mighty. We don't think it is respect
full to speak of Jay as though he wer'
d a cheese. --BoStOn Globe.
e Sweet Girl (disrobing)-'Did yov
e look under the bed?'' Old Maid
!. "What for?" $40 see if there was
u , man there" '.No, dear, I've given ul
- all hope" ."-Omaha World.
/. Lady (who had a sick husbanD-
o Don't YOU think. doctor. that yol
K ought to bleed nv hushand?" Docto
If (absent- t-lnindedly) madam, no
g until he gets well."--EpOch.
d Procrastination is the thief of time
The last time old Cras was seen he wa
W sitting in a Montreal hotel corrido
'e pitching pennies with Billy Moloney.--
NeW York journal.
=. Doctors say that drinking larg
>, quantities of water will produce fat L
At show its absurdity look at fish.
4 fairly lives in water yet why is it S
he bony9-Binghdn'toa Republican.
rs An exchange has an article on ''Chin
lt as Ii Is" Just how China is depend
I'D upon the hired girl. Generally IL
IS, wicked, and often so badly broken th'
d. it has to be swept out.-Omdhd World
1t seems that we are boycotting th
~ American hen aud are using aboI
er Is, 600. 900 foreign eggs every seaso
no This is something for alien poultry
nS crow over.-DctrOu Free Press.
of The expression "A boated bondhol'
in en-" is not a happy one Lots OF me
a who hold lots of bonds are not bloate'
and lots of men who hold little ell
as than lots of whisky are much bloated.
lit New Orleans Picdyune.