Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1887-01-08
HAPPY MARRIED LIFE.

"John," said Mrs. Marshmallow 10 her
licge lord, as they sat at breakfast one
pleasant morning; "John, some ono has
written book entitled, How to be Happy,
Though Married Queer, isn't it,"
"Decidedy-eXasp ratingty queer" re-
piled Mr.. Marshmallow. IF the book be
II serious enc, the effort is entirely super
fuOus; the author should be promptly con-
demned for trjfing with the feelings Of his
fellow MORALS by raising such wildly i'm
possible expectations
Il didn't mean exactly that, said Mrs.
Marshmcllow. rehectiv,ly.
well then, VII you kindly explain
what you did meau?" queried MIR. Marsh
mallow, "and | truS. your meaning will
prove clearer than this beverage which YOU
miscall cof'e'."
al mean that it is queer Tat any one
should have thought such book necessary
or called for. there seems TO b. an APP
parent absurdity in the very Ii IT, said
Mrs. Marshmalow, pouring her hu bands
second cup, and overlooking lis slur upon
her coffee.
"Ah-;trd there is Just where | should
differ with YOU" replied Mr.. MarShmallow.
The world Is simply yawnn@ for such
book, coull it b. successfully written Bot
the effort will prove n vain one; the prob
lem set forth in the yely promising tie
Won quot, clunot be solved. Has il never
occur d TO you that The comforting assnr-
ance that in heaven they neither marry
nor are given in marriage constitutes one
Of the surest found 'tionS OF eternal f~iic-
iN? II Bob IngeISoli and his Tx had fully
considered that text, they would never
have til Il to overthrow the authority of the
Bic ssed book that contains as glorious
promise"
And yet. have never observed signs of
any remarkable haste on Your part TO reach
that bright and ceiibat9 hereafter" sug
gcsted Mrs. Ma,shmalov, thoughtfully.
"Your remark is not pertinent to the dis
cussion, and, besides, it is stale, said Mr..
Marshmallow. And I am sure that if |
We're to step out suddenly, you world con.
sole yourself with some oIher fellow; enj
as he, whoever he may be. has never done
me any harm, / shall probably continue
to sacrifice myself for his benefit"
'Ycu are kind hearted man, John" re-
piled Mrs. Marshmallow softly, Tut yoHi
self-sacrtioe Is unnecessary. If kind
Providence Sees lit 10 release me from ms
present situation, | vii! agree never TO fall
into another scrape of the same kind"
\ gentle silence brooded like a benedic
ton over that breakfast talle. 1t length
John arose. is there anything you want
in town to- day." said he.
Nothing, replied his wife, except a
yard and half Of silk to match this sam
ple-you will find It at Sawyers-and half
a dozen spoois Of twist of the same shade;
and will you call at Sieele's, and II my
bracelet is m"rGed bring that up, and -
"Do You take me for an express wagon"
said Mr. Marshmallow with some asper.ty.
oh, no, said his wife, mot at all, an
express, wagon, YOU know, is a Great con-
venience. But. after all, | don't think my
packages will prove half SO burdensome as
must have the enormous load of fish L
overheard you telling Jack Springer about
the vast number Of trout YOU caught one
day last summer while We were up IN
Maine, you know"
Mr. Marshmplow descended the steps OF
his house with wrathful bang OF the
door, while lis vie went up stairs, hum
ming gospel hymn.