The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1887-06-30
JACKSON. OHIO. THURSDAY. JUNE 80. 1887.
The Merry Side !!

harper was goOu business man-lrue az
steal.
Many poor man can say that the Fidelity OF
a friend was his ruin.
They say Gen. Drum is a Pennsylvania. So
was Jim Buchanan.
The biggest confidence game yet discovered
in Cincinnati was the Fidelity Bank.
-
The nominations are being rapidly made and
the campaign liar is oiling his tongue
Denounce the flag sche,ne but take care to
denounce +he internal liquor traffic, too.
Young man, never try make people hate you
they will do that soon enough anyhow.
A "boomer" is good deal like a bubble
looks his grandest just before he explodes.
-.-
Harper is old iron-merchant. 1t comes
quite natural for him to be behind'the bars.
-.
Gen. Drum began his army life as private
soldier. This is no inspiration to the private
soldier.
You may truthfully say of many a scheme
"there's money in it," The trouble is 10 get it
out.
-.+
Joe Foraker don't wear 'as big .breeches as
Grove Cleveland, but he's a good deal bigger
| man.
E. L. Harper is no doubly- proud of this coun-
| try. He never knew SO much wheat grew here,
| before.
| 1t takes some young men long time to dis
cover that older men can run their own busi-
ness.
w T, ,1iof
knew what allied him. He parted his hair in
the middle.
Bummer-"I tell you, in Kansas Prohibitio
don't prohibitr'
Yes, but lying lies.
How can some men "love their neighbors as
themselves?" They wouldn't cheat themselves
out of nickel.
They have found good use for the Tolliver
family in Kentucky. They made a graveyard
out of them.
They say when a train enters a Maine town
the loafers wonder whether it is the Car of Jug
or-not.
Even excellence has its drawbacks. The
largest and f1nest-looking apples are always the
first to fall.
Harper's Weekly thinks there is nothing in
Cleveaud's conduct to shake the faith of the
Mugwump.
Cleveland wasn't in the Adrion Jacks for
nothing He was studying the habits of the
cray-fish.
1t is claimed by loyal Britishers that the
Queens Jubilee display actually beat Buffalo
Bill's show.
A Kentucky baby was born with two mouths
The price of whisky went up in four surround
ing counties.
The true character of Gen. Drum may be
gathered from thefact that drums are covered
with calf-skin.
Gen. Drum is.described as "a strict disciplin-
arian." We have discovered that he knows
how to obey orders.
The soldiers are more than ever impressed
with the idea that the only thing to do with
Drum is to pound it.
The young man who started out to make the
people feel "the power of the press" soon felt
the "press OF power"
If the Confederates want John Sherman to
quit waving the Bloody Shirt, let them take it
away and bury it.
When you whip your child, just remember
that if anybody should serve you that way you
would go for the police.
No, don't destroy the rebel flags. Keep them
as standing testimony that somebody turned
traitor-and got whipped.
So"
Cleveland rescinded the flag order "because it
was unlawful" The jury in the case was COM
posed of Yankee soldiers.
+.*
"will there be another panic ?" is the cry.
Well, possbly-there was a little panic in the
White House, few days ago.
Love may be blind-but the eye of the sold
man" can generally pierce the veil of darkness.
So can the boot jack.
The little man at Columbus was saucy |
enough, but the big stout fellows behind him |
killed Cleveland of, completely.
Boastful youth-ofering to bet.-"I never |
squeal!"
Old farmer-eyeing him closely.-"I don't see
why you shouldn'trr
jeff. Davis says "the captured flags belong to |
the States" And there's where they're going |
~ S'o oSAi', ct iSoSe ehoSO LII OhAo'
lightning-rod peddler never likes to do
business in the same county with an o1l-welI |
driller. He can'tdo himself justice.
Gen. Drum, never havin distinguished him
self in any other way, concluded to get himself
kicked for the amusement of the country.
-
The principal excuse of the President and
Adjutant- General seems to be that they "didn't
know there would be any fuss about it,"
A New England lady, looking at the Wash
ington Monument. fapturously exclaimed:
"Law whut gelorious place fur hop-vines to
run upn'
The plowman, to be successful, must strike
deep into the bosom of the EARTH So m ust the
plowshare of truth rend the human bosom, to
be effective.
Some of our exchanges claim that fish in the
Ohio Canal are ,perishing for want of water.
There are not even shade trees where they can
lie in the shade.
The Democrats speak of "the mistake of a
stupid man" How about the party that voted
for him for President?
The politicians should be careful not to at
tempt to crowd the liquor business forward
under cover of the rebel flag question. The
people are watching both.
The young man who "wanted to be an editor
because they hadn't much to do," soon applied
for work in a rolling mill, where he would have
something easy.
Sullivan is beginning 10 get cautious. He has
recently seen the big man from Buffalo knocked
out in one round by the little Governor from
Ohio.
"a%
The Waverly Watchman is sorry Foraker
made such fool of himself about the flags.
The fox was much exercised about the TOOL dog
that ran so hard to drive him away from the
chicken Rut be to