The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1887-12-22
teristic OF madman. And he never
took that eye off me!

eooh tHdt eye OH me!
/ again nearly closed my eyes and
pretended to be trying to sleep. but all
the time. l was keeping sharp look
out lest he should develop any violent
tendencies.
Soon the roadbed began to get so
rough that a succession of sharp jerks
nearly threw me off the seat. Pretense
atrsleep was no longer possible, so 1
sat up, rubbed my eyes and remarked:
This is pretty rough road
"You can bet it's about the worst
know in the whole country. That's
why I'm working it. But Charley
Hicks is driving tonight and he's so
careful I'm afraid there isn't any
chance" rp-pv-- --.at.-
There was no longer any doubt that
the man was mad. / glanced round
the car to see if there was an unoccu-
pied seat to which | could conveniently
move. There was not. had heard it
was best to humor maniacs, SO | thought
| would draw him out.
1T seems to me as if YOU wouldn't
mind being in an accident" began.
mind it! that's what I'm looking
for! Do you think I'd ride on this mis-
cradle road for any thing else?''
l was clearly in for it now. must
keep him talking and interested.
''Why do you want an accident?" l
asked, expecting him to tell me how he
loved to hear the timbers smashing.
the glass splintering, and fairly revcled
over the scene of horror and suffering.
Il live on 'em," he calmly answered,
''but this Internal road seems to have a
grudge against me. I've been working
it for two months and must have spent
nigh on to a hundred dollars for tickets
and haven't made a cent. Only last
week there was beautiful smash-up
to this very train, and would you be-
lieve it, was almost the only passcn-
ger who wasn't badly hurt!'
Twas just about to congratulate him
on his escape when fortunately re-
membered his mental condition and
checked myself in time.
How do you manage to live on acci-
dents?" inquired.
because I'm insured. Of course it
don't pay every one to get insured.
It's all lottery, but SO far I've been
very fortunate. Do you see that leg?'
he said. poking his right out towards
me.
lido"
Feel the ankle and the foot"
Now. had no desire to investigate
his anatomy, but as l was still uncer-
tain of his responsibility, | complied.
| ut feels pretty hard" l observed,
after lingering it very gently.
Don't be afraid of hurting me" he
said; Its wood!"
"Woodr' exclaimed.
Eyes, some time before my first ac-
cident-that foot was my first-a friend
persuaded me to take out an accident
policy. Twas professional billiardist,
and travelled about good deal play
ing matches and giving exhibitions.
Well, l got into a smash-up and that's
the result. 1 got five thousand dollars
for that foot, but my trade was gone.
couldn't move fast enough round 8
table to play in public. SO l hired
room and went into the business o.
keeping tables. 1t didn't pay and
lost nearly all my money. WASH
good for any thing else, and didn't
know what to turn to. One day | STRUCK
bright idea AN accident took away
my living; it's only fair that accident:
should keep mel l said. So bcgar
looking out for likely bits of road, ant
it wasn't much more than n month be
fore was on beauty. Do you se'
this" he continued, pointing to th'
eye, the glare of which had so fright
ened me.
Il do" mildly answered.
4 "It's glass. Isn't it darling? s.
natural it deceives every one.'
ut quite deceived me" l was able t.
remark. with absolute truth.
"Glad you like it. rll give you tn
address of the maker, in case YOU shoul'
ever want one or two. He's ava.
ahead--the best in the business. Well
that eye was another $1,000"
mot much for an eye" | sympa
thetically murmured.
mo, it wasn't enough. You see the
pay $1,000 for two eyes, and | don
think the proportion is right. But l di
|, better next time. Feel that arm!'
Ibid as was bid, and inquired if
was also wood.
"Papier-macher he said proudly
"It's always ahead of wood for light
ness and strength. Made by Mason
! best in the biz. Go to him if you eve
want any thing in that line. ;"
'How much did the arm bring you?
"Five thousand dollars, and that
S consider my best speculation"
e Doesn't the insurance company OF
ject to your frequent claims?'
: "Well, do little bit in canvassine
r so my travelling seems to be legitimate.
II should have thought you'd mad
enough to retire"
I've got very large family. an
IT,, h,,,J t> do my, host for fon, -