The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-10-27
BRIGHT BITS.

The basso profundo Tnay not he anything of a
sailor but he is always at nome on the deep c.
burlington Free Press.
THERE seems to be something in every occu-
patton that has its peculiar influence on the
minds OF men. While actors often become
crazy shoemakers always retain their senses to
the ast.-Dtsiuth Photographer,
Mrs. MUGGs-Muggs, you are wretch.
Mr.. MuggS-Nhy, why. My dear, what
Mrs. Muggs-Dont dear" me, villain Didn't
you tell me that typewriter was machine.
Mr.. Muggs-And so it is
Mrs. Muggs-lndeeds Then why did Mrs
wilkins say that your typewriter had beautiful
blonde halr?-Onedhd Herald.
STRANGER to servant)-How is Mr.. B. to-day:
Scrraut-He is very low, sir, and is not eX-
pected TO live more than few hours.
Stranger lin startled toney-Is that so?
Then must see him at once!
Servant-Are YOU an intimate personal
friend?
stranger-No, I'm the gas collector.-The
Epoch.
Two ANCIENT FAMLEs-"NIy family is very
ancient, remarked AN English tourist in Ohio.
ut dates back to the Crusades"
80 does niue" replied the Buckeye "My
mother was Crusader herself. And what a
noble stand they made against the liquor
traffic, too
"Aw," said the Englishmar, considerably
mystified.-Pittsburg Chronicle.
A LITTLE ONE-"Clean the snow off your
walk asked boy with old broom in his
hand, as he stood upon the steps of a Montcalm
street house.
snow" echoed the woman, where is it?"
There, ma'am."
why, there aren't over four flakes"
II know it, ma am, but all | wanted was a
short job."-DetroH Free Press.
SMITH say, Dumley, you have had some
experience in love affairs, and | want your
advice. There is a pretty little widow in Har-
lem whom devotedly love. In paying my ad-
dresses how often ought to call upon her?
Dumley-She is a widow, you say:
Dumley-Seven nights in a week, my boy.
with a Wednesday and Saturday Matinee
Epoch.
Two YOUNG LADIES of Murray Hill were en-
gagged in a var of words.
You needn't say anything about family
Ethel. l don't believe you ever had a grand
father"
Well. you had a grandfather, Clara" re-
torted Miss Ethel, land I've heard mamma saw
that he never sat down to elmer without first
taking bis coat Off That's worse than none at
all. Epoch.
DISTINGUISHED oREIGNER-Ye 1 have travel
ed great deal in this country, and cannot help
wondering why your government does not catch
these train robbers and lock them up.
American-Haye you met train robbers?
Plenty of them; they re everywhere, it seems
to me, but | must say they are very polite for
highwavmen."
"Polite!n
Very, and 1 notice too, that they are all
colored men"
"Oh, those are not train robbers; those are
porterS. '-OmdItd World.
FEMALE SUFFRAGE AGENT called to see if l
could not induce you to join our suffrage asso-
citation, Mrs. Politician
Mrs. Politician-Indeed will was opposed
to the whole business until happened to attend
a mass meeting last evening, and now want to
vote just as quick as the law will let me-
Yes, | saw you there with your husband He
seems TO be very popular. But nothing was
said at that meeting about womans suffrage.
What changed you so suddenly"
1T just occurred to that if had a vote
my husband would be polite to me during every
campaign '-OBtdha World.