Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-02-21
BILL NYB AND BIG HATS.
He Adds Ills Anathems to the General Chorus
in the Back Row.

ne Adds HIS AnAshemo to the General Chorus
in the Back Row.
From the New York World.
The late William Shakespeare once wrote
In an autograph album these words:
sincerely your friend.
Perhaps he meant that there were flies on
it--but We will not undertake to enter this
field of thought However, TO speak in q
more serious vein and treating the subject In
q more dgnited way, will stats that after a
number Of years scrutiny OF the world am
convinced that the great bard used this ex-
preston In fgurative sense only. Could
he pick up his pen today he would either
erase the above line or add to ii so that 1t
would read
"All the worlds a stage and nobody bu.
the woman in high hat can see what Is
going on upon il. Yours bitterly,
1t Is not new field, perhaps, this discus
sior OF the tall ha,, but desire in
my poor weak way to add my testi.
mony to the testimony of those who
have sat,down on said hat l feel OF a truth
-cccasionally-thatt this high hat Is making
an old man Of me and drawing lines Of care
here and there over my fair young face.
Here at time when ought to be in the full
flush and pr ide OF manhood ind myself no
longer able to build the fire in the morning,
and my breath which was once as robust
as that of the upas tree, now comes in short
pants.
The tall ha. with wsd O, timothy or i've
pound pompon at the apex thereof, has
brou ght this about. How would man LOOK
who might sit in the bald headed row wear.
ing q joint OF stovepipe on his head trimmed
with hay? Has II not been the custom for
years TO place baid.headed men on the front
row, because they offer no obstruction to the
visions
And now, what do We see:
We do not see anything!
will leave it to any disinteres:ed person
to say whether l do not love and admire
woman, whether aggregated or aggregated,
but abe does do some things which as her
friend and admirer deeply regret
Not long ago I bad the pleasure OF attend.
ing one OF Mr.. Booths performances in
which he took the part OF Hamlet with great
credit to himself, as l afterwards learned
from member OF the orchestra who saw the
whole performance.
II had not promised a former wife OF
mine that would never touch liquor would
have been amply justified that evening In
saturating myself with bay rum or some
other seductive beverage.
paid large price q week beforehand for
seat at the Hamlet performance, because
had mefMr. Booth once N the Rocky Noun.
tains any had made q deep impression on
him. had also told him that II he ever b p
| pen.aSst to be in q town where was lecturinp
I would dismiss any audience to come ana
| hear him, and he might do as he though
| best about shutting up on the following nigh
to come and hear me
| Well, 1 noticed at first, when went in
| that the row before me was unoccupied, snC
| gathered myself up In q strong, manly em
| brace and hugged myself with Joy. Th,
curtain bumped itself, and the first act wa
about In the act OF producing ITSELF when
| meek little gentleman, with an sir OF con
scious guilt, came down the aisle in advanc,
| OF woman's excursion, consisting OF foul
female members OF his family, judged. II,
looked about over the house, timidly took OF
bis coat and seemed to be preparing himsel
Tor the vigilance committee Then he ss
down to see whether executive clemency
| could do anything for him.
| The first woman OF the four was probably
over forty, and yet with her almost beardlss
face she looked scarcely thirty eight. Sh'
wore tall, erect hat with sort Of plume 4
1t, made by pulling the paint. brush tail on
OF an iron-gray mule and dying 1t Q dee]
| crimson.
She wore other clothing, but that did no
incense me 30 much as this hat, which haC
to examine critically all the evening.
| She moved her head also, and Kept tim,
to the music, and bresthed hard In places
and shuddered once or twice. She ais,
spoke to the miserable man who brough
her. Her voice was . rich baritone with
| low Xylophone action, and she breathed lik
| the passionate exhaust Of an over.worke cd
| freight engine. When she spoke to her ca
cort noticed that he shortened up abou
four inches and seemed to wish he had neve
entered society.
The other three women had broad hat
with domes to them, and the one who sat ol
my right also sat on her foot. This gave he
| fine opportunity to look out through tn
skylight OF tho opera house now and then
The next one to her wore q decease,
Plymouth Rock rooster in her hat. Th
fourth one sat in front of an oldish gentleman
who went out between the acts and came II
with picked olive in his mouth each time
He could not see ything on the stage, bu
lie crawled up under the brim OF thi
woman's hat, with his nose In the meshes O
her hair, and his hot, local option breath Il
her neck, patiently trying to see whether tn
slender legs. In long, black hose, belonged L
Mr.. Booth, Apollinarus or the ballet.
lfyou will continue in your excellent pape
to sit down on the tall hats, ! will get yol
| quite number Of subscribers here.
| RII.Y NYR