St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1887-03-13
that they are not behind this age of pro-
. ! ,,raeSinn
REMINISCENT WON EN-.
Married or single They All Like to
Celebrate,

But talking of celebrations, don't you
know, woman must celebrate something,
observes correspondent of the San Fran
cisco Chronicle If she is married she
wants to celebrate the foolish occasion an
nually. She'll keep itup till she uses up all
the material. mineral and vegetable. that
can possibly be used to make presents of.
| suppose we'll have aluminium weddings
and platinum weddings presently. But
know an old maid who takes all the medals.
Sine celebrated the twenty-lifth anniversary
of the nearest approach TO being married
she ever had. Twenty five years before she
had Il beau who had been rather attentive.
1t worked up, as it does in the country,
very slowly. That's very curious. Did
you ever notice that the country sweet
heart who has the most glorious opportuni-
ties of pressing his suit, the most heavenly
chances of wooing. is always bashful and
backward? That's what novel writers always
make out. | cannot believe it. 1t seems
incredible that any kind of human nature
should be so blind to the obvious meaning
of creation, of nature with its silent woods.
its shady walks, its quaint turns in the path,
its sentiment-insplring brooks and streams.
| recommend this subject as philosophical
study for blaSe society this Summer-in
palrS-When they go into the country.
However, we've kept this Old maid waiting.
She may be accustomed to it but its not pO-
lite This beau on one eventful evening
had walked himself up sufficiently to pro-
pose that he should take the young lady out
for drive He seemed to have hesitated
about it afterward. or it may have been
from that baShfullness which the n0velists
describe. Anyhow he was late, and she
was petulant and annoyed; or perhaps she
put that on. At all events she told him
that for a cent she would not go at ALL"
He pulled out a cent, handed it to her.
drove off and never came back. And now
with twenty-five years retroSpection she
celebrates the anniversary of the event.
She pretends to be glad. | doubt it.
Did you ever meet with that unfortunate
man whom everybody who does not know
him firmly believes is married? The man to
whom every married woman says: Re
ally you ought to have a nice little wife and
a nice little home. You would make such
all admirable domestic husband" When
they know that he isn't and isn't likely to
be they Immediately put up a history for
him and give it out confidentially that he
has had an adventure: that he has loved
and been Tilted, or that the loved
one has died, and his heart is in
the tomb of the Capulets with his be-
loved Juliet. And they pity him and are
tender and gentle to him, and the young
girls avoid him and the old maids flock
around him and want to console him. II
you'll investigate him you'll find he's per-
fectIy sound. perfectly heartwhoe. has
perhaps Tilted lot of girls. and is just as
merry bachelor as there is The fact is,
hearts nowadays have good, strong strings
to them, and are very scientifically fixed
for the drawback Perhaps the most se-
we're tax on this kind of mans good nature
is the theory that he's married to a shrew-
ish wife, and that's why you never see
them together. That no man can endure
| with patience, and l have known fellows
forced into matrmony, bounded. so to
speak, into the ring, by just such kindly
theories.