West Virginia Democrat. [volume] (Charles Town, W. Va.) 1885-1890, 1887-09-02
AT A BowERY DIME MUSEUM.
Sketches Recently Taken of Wonderful
Curiosity Now To Be Seen--Mun
chausen Outdone.
Times.

A dime museum with a foreign
name and list of attractions as
long as an Evarts speech, and locat-
ed not great distance from Grand
street, has n curiosity wonderful in
deed.
The barker always calls attention
to this extraordinary specimen Of
creation when he is talking against
space and elevated car rumbles.
When he gets inside he turns the his
torical lecture over to an lchabod-
Crane-looking individual who is the
discoverer. 4.
The curiosity is a full-grown buck
deer with fine antlers and skin.
The only thing about this deer
-whic,r.is different from other deer
is a peach tree growing out of its
back near the shoulders.
The lecture about this buck sounds
a great deal like an oflshot of Mum
chausen's brain.
The barker whirls his cane, points
at the deer, and says:
Ladies and gentlemen, we have
here the mos extraordinary exposi
ton of natures handiwork ever dis
played before an audience in this
country or in Europe-indecd, /
might say ther mos extraordinary
curiosity ever seen upon this won
derfullest of spheres in the grand
caravansary of moving worlds which
surround us in brilliant galaxies,
overhead and around us.
"This, ladies and gentlemen, as
you see, is a magnificent specimen Of
the genus deer, perfect in all its parts,
but with common peach tree grow
ing from its anatomy.
This here deer was stuffed by the
best numismatic known to the art of
taxidermal prestidigation.
"Permit me to introduce You to
Col. Fletcher,the gentleman who pro.
cured this rara avis, and gave it to
a world Of scientific investigation"
With a proud wave Of his hand
and cane, the barker resigned his
place to Colonel Fletcher. Colonel
Fletcher was caught somewhere
down in Georgia, and in an unguard
ed moment was brought TO New York
for the special purpose of lecturing
on this deer.
"Hit war about twenty yeah ago,
jist artah the wah, an ! war a-walk-
in toad hum from turkey huntin'.
I'd killed a couple O big gobblahs
and a hen, an war feelin' pooty good.
/ war jist on the edge o. ther swamp
when / seen sumpun movin,' an
diskivered fine buck.
Il he'd big bob muskit, loaded
with powdab, but didn't bey no
buckshot, nor bullets, nor nuthin' in
ther shape O lead. / fooled aroun
in my pockets, an foun' peach
stone. / rammed ther stone dowr
ther gun, and fihed pint blank at
ther buck jist benin ther shouldahs.
Hit skeered ther deer, but, reckon,
didn't hurt him much.
"Five yeahs artah that were n
walkin' nigh ther same spot, an seen
sumpun amovin' in the switch cane.
Hit war kin o. queer fuh ennythink
but yahmint ter be aroun' thah,
an incoarse / knowed it wah a crit
tab o some kim, mebbe dcah. 1t
mought a bin a hoss, though, so
skumished little.
''In minnit / seen tree-a-shak
in in ther cane, an it want a swamp
tree nuthah. Well, sab"
The Colonel elected a cupful Of to-
bacco juice, wiped his chin with his
sleeve and continued:
"Grin' me ter sassage meat ef thah
wasn't a big buck a-walkin' arouD,
with a big peach tree on his back.
1 fihed my muskit, an ther buck jist
lept into ther aih, an down he an
ther tree come ka sock.
We'll, sab, / got bushel an q
haf O. ther bes' peaches / eyah ct in
my life off'n that tree"
The audiense always examines tho
deer after the lecture.