Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1887-08-04
Receptions and Parties.
Harper'S Bazaar.

Harpers Bazaar
Above all thing, if we do not do awav
with the o'clock tea, let Us really observe
it IL sensible English fashion-not
| light our houses as if for ball, nor dress
as hostess SO that when a lady enters in
her walking dress she seems out of place.
Let Us give party in the daytime if we
wish to, but let US call it party.
Mrs. A, Mrs. B. and Mrs. G. will give
| their parties or their teas to suit their
taste and their incomes and according to
the convenience of their own particular
family circle. But why should Mrs. D.,
Mrs. E. and Mrs. F. give their entertain
ments slavishly after the fashion thus set.
They may have fine houses and unlimited
bank accounts, many servants, and house
which looks better at night
Why should not a lady so situated give
her parties in the evening? In Washing
ton, where everything is conducted official
ly, it is astonishing how much better they
arrange this thing which we call society.
There, where there is not ne-sixteenth
part of the wealth or the premeditated
gayety which there is in New York, bat
where there is an official head, receptions
and evening parties and dinners are all
regulated so we'll that they do not trip up
each others heels, and New York woman
comes home astonished at the amount of
social work which she has done and the
number of agreeable men whom she has
seen and talked to. The hours are so
arranged that the men of mind and of
business can go into society; but what
men who are working can now go into
society in New York?
The want of an acknowledged head to
society in New York is a serious trouble.
In Washington, even in our simple Re-
publican way of doing things, there is
an official head 20 everything, and every
circle stands off with the vision of au-
thority at least-a great thing in social
customs. The Presidents wife has her
days ana evenings; the Secretary's wife
hers. The business of the newcomer is to
call first, which is true etiquette. The
return to the evening reception and the
formation of social clubs has been one of
society's efforts to restore this equilib-
rum which afternoon teas have upset.
1t seemed melancholy to the young
married man who was busy in his bank
all day to be unable to go into society
with his wife. Yet he could not go to
ladies lunches or afternoon teas; he was
busy. He could not go to balls at II
o'clock, because he was obliged to be at
his desk next morning at 9 o'clock. And
it seemed melancholy that the great social
leaders in the great, beautiful, rich,
artistic city of New York could do moth
ing better than to expect guests to ride,
like the boy and his father in the ballad,
through darkness and snow, from Wash
ington Square to Seventy ninth street,
pursued by the erl-king, carrying under
his shadOwy,, cloak rheumatism, 'di phtheria,
and pneumonia, only that the favored
guests may see three or four ladies dres-
sed for ball in a hot, fowerbedecked
house, where, later on is to be dance,
young lady being introduced, and the
greater part of the non-dancing guests
asked to Give o'clock tea" It is way of
getting rid of them, and of doing the
thing cheaply, which is not commendable.
Far different is the five o'clock tea,
which is a simple cup of tea and piece
of bread and butter, which holds good in
some houses every afternoon in the sea-
son, in others, only on one day of the
week, in some only on certain days of
the month, as "wednesday in February"
This is a sensible way of seeing ones
friends, and the lady of the house should
be plainly dressed.
Of course the outlines OF things get
mixed in social matters, and fashion
often outgrows itself, and the tea and the
reception have been COMPOUNDED. Now
an afternoon reception should be ca. Tier
than tea; the card should be formal
one-"Mrs. Brown at home on Wednesday
from to 6; and the table usually groans
with Injuries, Or it may be onl- sand
witches, oysters, salads, ices, etc. we'll
bred hostess should not err on the side of
too much profusion and magnifcence.
Many ladies have tried to introduce
dancing at these receptions, but in
crowded room it is Objectionable, as few
houses are large enough for both dancing
and receiving, unless there is ballroom.
The hostess should even on these occas-
ions be plainly dressed in her own house,
so that her guests may not be ashamed of
quiet toilet.
People leave a card in the hall at a re-
ception, but it is proper for gentleman
also to make an evening call in full dress
on the lady who has invited him. The
| obligation is not so great after tea, but
still it would be polite to do SO. Polite
ness is never thrown away. 1t is, as we
have said, cardinal virtue.