The Washington critic., 1887-02-15
GENERAL AND ontrIcuLAn

GENERAL AND CnirIcULAn.
GEovrR's FAREWELL To MNsSfNJ.
Farewell, oh, Dluioll 10 my cause
While yet you may be true,
Your going now, hut makes fne pause
And wonder what I'll do.
ncset by Mugwumps, MS am,
I've left our future state
To you, In whom there is no sham,
To keep the party straight
Your going, Daniel, gives IN. pain,
And fills my soul with doubt
Ten thousand foes with might aud main
VIII ritc to knock me out.
Your guiding hand has led me on,
While but turned the wheel
That steered the ship--when you are gone
shall be aus gepiel.
Farewell, oh, Manning, Pm bereft
OF hope in eighty y.eight,
Since you are gone, and | am left
To Mugwumps and to Fate.
money now," remarked Major Stofah, as
be stood before the elegant pier glass in
bis room, with soft brush in his hand.
whats that fori' inquired Spriggins.
"Because it's soon parted,n aud he
pushed the brush back toward his collar 80
that 1t might make hirsute connection.
X street girl, to her brother: ~ say,
Harry, the girls on Sixteenth street have
organized Thought Club"
Harry: "'Thought Club ehS Thinking
about whether they'll catch husband
this season, or have to wait over another
year.
Young lady at hotel, to caller: "Ah, Mr..
Dc Doodle. You have left cur hotel, be-
lieycfn
Mr.. DE Doodle: "Ya-as, don't you know.
Young lady: $50 sorry. What ever
could have possessed you"
Mr.. De Doodle: "Aw, Miss Fwawnces,
1t was the beastly nawpkins, don't you
know. The waitah bwought them In
dawmp, don't you know, and they gave me
tewihc cold in the head. A man cawn't
stand every thing, Miss Fwawnces."
wealthy young amateur with fond
cluded to 90 on the stage as Hamlet.
"Don't you think" said his mother to a
friend one night, after he had been on about
month, at cost OF $4,000, tiny boy will
be a very great trGgedian some dayS
"Well, really, can't say" was the eau
tious reply; "but In one particular he is
very like Bcoth.n
"Ah, thank you," said the fond mother
"ln whist particular, pray ~
"EIe always comes to the theatre In car
riage, madam
In coast-defense oratorical editorial the
New York Sun states that the next war is
inevitable. At first blush we thought the
Sun was merely talking for buncombe, but
upon mature reflection we have concluded
that II the next war Is not inevitable there
is something wrong with the dictionary.
The Member from Wayback hands us the
following for publication. He says II was
reported to have come from Newspaper
Row." but the signature had excited doubts
in his mind as to that quarter being the
source:
DEAR JEDGE WAXEM: VIII You please
announce In your next speech on the floor
OF the House OF Representatives so that II
may be widely irculated-that the Clarence
O'Brien who was the other day drag netted
before Judge Smell, charged with various
feats Of legerdemain with cards, Is not the
handsome and accomplished O'Brlen OF the
United Press Moreover, Will you an-
nounce that this Clarence O'Brien is not OF
the same kidney, kith or kin OF the h. and
q. gentleman aforesaid? TRuru.
The following verses were picked up In
the corridor Of The Postoillce Department
Just after fair lady clerk had passed,
and refer to the promotion OF Mr.. Nash,
late Chief Clerk, to the position OF Railway
Mail Superintendent, just vacated by Col.
Jameson:
IN MEMoRIAM.
never met handsome mash
But ill-luck sent him far astray;
never loved man like Nash
But he was sure to get away.
Oh, royal Nash, whom we deplore
O'er kingdoms new tho sent TO reign,
SIN In my heart TIL life Is DER
My chief and lord thou must remain.
tTears.)
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