Fort Worth weekly gazette. [volume] (Fort Worth, Tex.) 1882-1891, 1887-11-11
MEN OR WOMEN!
Which Are the Truest and Most Un-
selfish Friends?-- Ella Wheeler on
an Interesting Question.
Views OF Different Women-Are Men
the More Generous in Friendships
Toward Wamsn?-Opinlons.
Some Entertaining Anscdotes-Man More
Ready, but Women More Lasting
In Their Friendships.
COpyrighted, 1881.

question discussed in ell it's bearings MOI
long ago, and great many interesting
anecdotes and experiences were related
The majority Of unmarried women ex-
pressed quite unanimously an opinion in
favor of the men. The married ladies
were less ontspoken, but the greater
number OF them were not enthusiastic in
their faith in mans friendship for woman
Their skepticism might be attributed to
various causes. Perhaps they knew the
genus homo better than their single sis.
tiers did. Perhaps they did not think ii
wise to encourage the damsels in their
dangerous even If true theory.
Many an unmarried girl is blind to the
| virtues Of women because she has not
time to study them. Her horizon is
bounded by masculine forms, and she Is
| quite content to have it so. By and by,
when she concentrates her attention ana
| interest in one man, and the others dis
appear like setting stars at the rise OF
the sun, why then she notices the
beauty and fragrance Of those human
hoWers-Women.
heard one young lady, who had fought
g single-handed battle with the world,
and achieved success, declare that the
question was not even open to discussion
in her mind.
~ think no one is better Judge of the
mstter," she said, ethan a woman who
has had to make her own Wav in life. l
received appreciation and encouragement
from men, when women gave me Only ic-
difference or neglect. Men predicted ray
success, while women feared would fail
Men praised what they termed my cour-
age, while women criticised what they
termed my boldness.'
Another lady declared that she would
invariably go to man were she in need
of friendship or protection in time CT
trouble.
If l were placed in g compromising
situation, FOR instance" she said, "sud
wished to confide in some one, and had
only my own words to prove my inno-
cence, do you think would trust myself
to the mercy of woman? No, indeed
And if had done wrong and needed q
confessor and counsellor, surely [ would
go to man. Women are so cruel to
their own SEX"
At this juncture I remarked that a man
would always protect woman against
every maj but himself. He would defend
her from the censorious comments Os TIL
world quicker than another woman would
and then spoil it all By Compromising
her name herself.
Hereupona happy looking married lady
expressed her opinion.
"You have all given your theories"
quoth she. "Now listen to my expert
ence. No girl ever possessed more gentle
man friends than L. My career was
self-msde and self-supportlng one also
l, too, found men far reader with praise
and encouragement than women were
Men preferred advice and cid, while Wo-
men gave it if asked. Yet as time ad-
varced l found men far more selfish in
their friendship than women were. The
interest of my most platonlc male friends
noticeably lessened after my marriage,
and in several cases turned into enmlty,
while women regarded me with increased
favor.
"Men whose respect and admiration,
unmixed with any tender sentiment, Il
would have sworn l had won, did not
hesitate to shrug their shoulders and
sneer when l made an excellent marriage,
and no longer needed their occasional
advice. l really think mans friendship
for an unmarried woman is always, even
if unconsciously to himself, selfish
While she belongs to no one he imagines
she in some degree belongs to himself,
and rejoices in her prosperity. When
she belongs to another man all this
ceases. Women are less enthusiastic in
the beginning, but their friendship wears
better"
81 don't know how it Is In the matter
Of friendship" young lady interposed,
"Dut know when go into any large es-
tsblishment shopping 1 always receive
better attention and more courtesy from
the statesmen than from the ssles-girls.
II desire to be directed to another de-
partment in the store, always prefer TO
ask a nan, as he is more willing and at
fable in his manner.
A young girl who had once published
little book and sold it on the street to
said: "Men are far kinder
hearted than women. Women looked me
as if were doing some dreadful and i'm
proper act; men looked at me with SYM
patny and interest. In any time OF dis
tress women look at you as If you were
lying to them; men wait until they
catch you in lie, and then tell you of it,
They forget and forgive wrong, too, fsr
sooner then women do"
Hereupon l remarked that once upon q
time I asked favor of gentleman in the
presence of two ladies'. The gentleman
expressed the deepest sympathy aud the
most genuine regret that be could not
assist me. Both ladies voluntarily
offered the aid which l had not thought Of
appealing for to them.
l think If you can once remove all idea
of possible rivalry from q womsn's mind
she makes better friend than any man
living Tellja womanIyour successes, and
she nay show jealousy; but tell her your
sorrows and your failures, and she is
moved to befriend you.
On the contrary, tell man of your sue
cesses, and you win his admiring regard;
while if you tell him your troubles, you
weary him.
Oze lady said she thought men were
more prompt and agreeable, as 8 rule,
than our own sex in their manner of be-
slowing fevors, and it was because they
were educated to business methods. A
woman often wounded your feelings from
no lack Of kind impulses, but merely from
her awkWsrdness in dealing with any
matter outside of psrlor or kitchen. a
married lady said she quite conceded
with the last speaker in regard TO the
business methods of the starrer sex.
Thereupon she related her somewhat
UNI sual experience.
''I IVES an srtist,' she said, "snd my
studio in the ssme building in which
an elderly professional gentleman occu-
pied an office. He obtained an introduce
ton to me, and became greatly interested