davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25
General Lees Hen.

In Longs life of Gen. Lee an interesting
story of hen is told. A few chickens
were once presented to the general. In
the lot was laying hen whose life was
sparel. The hen accompanied the army
to Gettysburg, riding in the baggage
wagon, and after that battle was with
the Confederates for nearly a year. AT
last the hen grew fat and lazy, and one
day the steward, finding his supplies
very low, and knowing that the general
expected distinguished guest at dinner,
killed the hen, and she was served up on
the altar of hospitality. Gen. Lee was
surprised to see 50 fine fowl set before
him, but he little dreamed that his pet
hen had been slaughtered. When the
hen was missed, however the steward
had to confess that he had been placed
in position like unto that OF the boy
who had to capture the ground hog.
There was company for dinner and no
meat
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25
An Electrical Baton.

Leading a chorus by electrical ap-
paratus has been tried in Paris. The
current is used in beating time for the
chorus of an opera company while the
singers are behind the scenes. An
electrical baton, hung in a conspicuous
place, is controlled by the foot of the
leader of the orchestra, who has also in
front of him small duplicate, by which
he can see whether his foot is beating cor
rect time. The electrical baton does not
actually move in space, but it presents
the appearance of doing so. There are,
in fact, two batons occupying different
positions, which on being rovolved by
the action of electromagnetic, present
white and black faces alternately on the
back ground. An optical illusion is
thus produced exactly equivalent to the
movement of single white baton in
the hands of leader. 1t is said that
much greater precision is obtained by
this divice than where the time is beaten
for the chorus by a second leader behind
the scenes.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25

"You will never have clean streets in
America, said an Italian gentleman in
the Colonnade hotel Yesterday, "as long
as you throw away the dirt. In Italy
the cleaning Of the streets is sold to the
highest bidder at public auction, and
the man who gets the contract fairly
scrapes the streets to collect all the dirt
he can. It's then taken to a factory,
where it is pressed into blocks which ar.
then sold for fertiIizing purposes. You
Americans do not seem to know that
your street dirt is valuable. | think il
you would advertise you would fine
some smart man who would be glad tt
take a ten years contract to clean you
streets for nothing. He would get very
rich. - Philadelphia Call.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25
Meaning of ..Snhlimr Porte.n

A pl rase often seen in dispatches from
Constantinople is thus explained by NJ.
Juliari in his article on life Beneath
the Crescent in the Cosmopolitan
The building of the porte, called sub
lime is, or was, kind of long, low
barracks, without style and without
beauty. A fire destroyed part of it three
years ago.
The phrase Sublime porte" applied
to both the building and the admins
tration, two things that are important, but
neither the one nor the other is sublime.
This word has, however very ancient
origin. When the Turks, long before
the conquest, were only hordes of Tar
tars and nomads, their chiefs or sultans
were in the habit of dispensing justice
at the door of their tent There the
cadis assembled and heard the com
paint and then the defense. The sultan
appeared upon the spot only at the con =
clusion of the trial to get the opinions
of the judges and to render his decision.
Tc go to the porte was for the Turks
the equivalent of seeking justice at the
hands of the sultan and his counselors.
As to the pompous epithet Sublime, ="
coupled with this poor porte, it is one
of those Oriental speeches that the fattery
of the weak has bestowed voluntarily upon
the tyranny Of the strong. The Turkish
: -highne9s, exeeIlence. ssasv.ae. celestIAL.
which in our day ana ID ths
West offend the dignity of those that
receive them, and of those that bestow
them, but which one in the East can
freely bestow upon high personages
without laughing or making them laugh.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25
The Virginia Industries.

In talk the other day with cx-Gov-
srnor Cameron of Virginia, he referred
10 two large indus ries Of his State by
saying that Virginia raises more peanuts
,hon wheat and that sumoc gathering
aas assumed a leading position as an
industry. The sumac grows wild and
is gathered by the colorcd people at a
time Of the year when they have nothing
else to do. They pick the blossoms in
great bags VI ch they carry to the cities
where the sumac IS dried and pulverized
for chemical and medicinal uses. At
Petersburg, Virginia, which is the centre
Of the sumac growth, the production
amounts to a million do,.rs. Il New
York Tribune.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25
The Peasant and the Rohher.

A peasant who was growing a fine
crop of barley awoke one morning to
find that the flood had entered his field
and destroyed every stalk of his grain.
Thereupon he began to tear his hair and
lament, but stranger who came along
tapped him on the shoulder and said:
"Harkee, my friend, but you do not
know of what you complain. Had your
barley come to maturity and been sent
to market, I should have waylald and
robbed you of every dollar of the pro-
ceeds" Whatever happens is for the
best, even when the neighbor's COW eats
up our cabbages. = Detroit Free Press.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25
HUMOROUS.

The surest way to raise pigs is by the
tails.
Speaking Of animals, what docs the
catamount toi
Why do people say slip up when
man always slips down
The pusiIist is the mo lern shylook.
He is always seeking pound of flesh.
An unsteady man like an unsteady
light, is apt to go out nights.
Although not talkatvc at all, the oys-
ter is a very pleasant companion at din
ner.
The barber generally manages to make
living, even if he is always working al
cut rates.
Scientists believe it impossible for
man to have a double. If this IS so how
can a man be beside himself
A correspondent says all foreigners in
St. Petersburg are treated in the "most
curt and disdainlul manner"
A railway from Chicago direct to the
CITY Of Mexico is projected. With
few more additional facilities for leaving
c the city life in Chicago will become bear
h able.
e Merchant to his clerk--I am sorry !
r. cannot let you have your last months
Is salary to-day, but since, as you very
we'll know, time is money, | Will give
YOU months vacation.
a Hungry Guest: 'How is thlsf ! OF
= .fea . steak and poached egg. Sc
Z attendant r. bass s' q a r. rghs fshsl' las
steak am under dc egg."
is 1t is astonishing how much scoru, in
h dignation and contempt woman car
is put into two words. If you do not be-
III lieve it just listen while she speaks Of
some one she dislikes as "that man.
re "Therc is more pleasure in giving
t. than in receiving" was the proverb &
Is mother was trying to instill into youth
full mind "Thats true about casto
IN oil, mother" was the answer she got.
90 y3u have damp sheets? said the
.. - fussy old man at the hotel, securing a
room. "No, said the clerk, who want
10 cd to be obliging, "but we can sprinkle
d 'em for you if you like them that way"
Hc-'I beg your pardon, miss, but
le don't admire your last name" She
8, "Great heavens, man, haven't l done
IS everything in my power to change
IS it2 Must | knock man down With q
u clubW
is "Comc in, my poor man," said a be-
nevolent lady to a ragged tramp "and
will get you something to cat"
"ThaLk}, mum don't care if do" q
- suppose" continued the lady, setting a
d a square meal before him, 'your life has
Y been full of trialsT' 'Yis, mum; an the
$ wust Of it wuz, alIus got convicted.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25
Cronn. a Mothers Tribute.

"While in the country last winter my little
HOY. three years old was taken i'll with Group;
il seemed as if he would die from strangu-
latjon. One Of the family suggested the use
Of AYERS CHERRY PICTORIAL, bottle Of
which was ALWAYS kept in the house. This
was tried in small and frequent doses, and
10 our delight in less than half an hour the
little patient was breathing easily. The doc
Tor said that the CHERRY PECToRAL had
saved my darling's life. Can you wonder at
our gratitude? Sincerely yours,
MRS. EMMA GEDSEY."
i59 West f2sth ST., New York, May Is, 1889.
"T have used AYERS CHERRY PEeToRAL
Il, nv family for several years, and do not
hesitate to pronounce it the most etieetual
remedy for coughs and colds We have ever
tried. a, a. - SnANF'
..Isutfered for eight years from Bronchitis
.nd after irving many remedies with no sue
cess. was cured by the use of AYERS CHER
Dv pEcrORAL. JOSEPH WALDEN"
Byhala, Miss, April 8, lse2'
.r cannot say enough in praise Of AYERS
cuFRRy PECToRAL, believing as | ds that
bnt for its use should long since have died
from lung troubles +. bRA1poS.
No case of an affection of the throat or
,,ngs exists which cannot be greatly relieved
NV the use Of AYERS CHERRY PEcToRAs,
and it will ARRAYS cure when the disease is
not already beyond the control OF medicine.
PREPARED BY
Dr.J.C.Ayer& Co., Lowell, Mass
Sold by all Druggists.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25
Why We Butter Bread.

Dr. John G. Vanderveer, in the course
of a lecture on Food and Stlmu ants 3"
delivered in Brooklyn, said Although
bread contains an abundance of starchy
and albuminous matters, it is deficient
in fat. This is why our instinct leads
US to use butter or some other fatty ma
terial to make up the deficiency. Very
few Of my hearers, l venture to say, ever
looked at it in this light before. Butter
is generally considered luxury. 1t is
an absolute necessity.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25
NO. 50.
lam Great and You are Small.

Am Great and You are SMALL
A sparrow swinging on a branch
Once caught passing fly;
"Oh let me lve." the insect prayed,
With trembling, piteous cry.
"No. sa the sparrow, you must fall,
For am great and you are small
The bird had scarce begun his feast
Before a hawk came by;
The game was caught, Pray let me llVe'
Was now the sparrow's cry.
"No. said the captor, you must fall,
For am great and you are small
AN agile saw the rogue and swoop2d
Upon him from on high;
"Pray let me live; why should you Kill
So small bird a I'
ooh, said the eagle "yol must fall,
For lam great and you are small
But while he at, the hunter came;
He let his arrow fly.
"Tyrant! the eagle shrieked you have
/ No right to make me die|
"Ah. r said the hunter, you must fall
For am great and you are small
FRO the Garm7n
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25
A Strange Experiment,

King James ~. Of Scotland is said to
have ordered an experiment to be carried
out which must be regarded as one of
the strangest ever recorded. With a
view to learn what was the original hu-
man language, he had a dumb woman
lodged on the Isle Of Inchkeith, in the
Firth Of Forth, aud two infants entrust-
ed to her care. Oddly enough, the
result was considered satisfactory, for in
due course it was found that they spoke
very good Hebrew - Little Folks.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25
or and On.

"Why do you desire to leave mep
said a gentleman to his footman.
Because, to speak the truth, cannot
bear your temper"
10 be sure l am passionate, but my
passion is no sooner on than it's off"
yes" replied the servant. Bat IT'S
no sooner off than it's on.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25
A Forernnner Of Disaster.

A bright looking young woman in on,
of the fashionable dry goods stores tolt
me she never, if she could possil Iy hell
it, sells an article to person who hac
lost front tooth, as it is always fore
runner Of disaster to her 81 always ge
some of the other girls who are no
supelstitious to wait on such people" shf
said .--lChic4eo Journal.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25
P.enty OF NJ Iney.

A farmer, herring that money was
cheap in the city. came to see about it
lie entered a bank, called for the Cash.
icr, and said "Mr Cashier is it true
that money is abundant and cheap p
The Cashier answered in the affirmative.
"Can get some ~ quetied the country.
man Certainly replied the moneved
man. "Well just lend me hundred
dollars for six months. The Cashier
said "You can have the money-we
have plenty Of it-but it is necessary for
US to have collateral" he farmer
WINGED and responded Collateral
What the deuce is that r. The matter
was explained Then the planter Of the
soil, Illuminated on the subject Of finan
ciaI economy, with broad grin. re-
oined. "Ah, l see how it is, Mr..
asher Money is plentiful and not
high, but it is this banked collateral
that is scarce and hard to get. - iugttstl
Gh) Chr0a Gle.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25
A Timely Suggestion,

"Hello, Richelieul You don't call on
Miss Dilby any something upG"
"Yes, Arthur, confess it--there is!
Why, don't you know I stayed little
late the other night, and dash me if she
didn't get up and winl the clock ~
detroit Free Press.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25
A Terrible COUCH Cured.

ain 1887 l took a severe cold which affected
nv lungs. / had a terrible cough. and Passed
night after night without sleep. The doctors
gave me up. / tried AYERS CHERRY PFC
TORAL. which relieved my lungs, induced
sleep. and afforded me tile rest necessary
for the recc very Of my strength. BY the
continued use Of the PECroRAL perma-
nent cure was effected. ! am now g. years
old. hale and hearty, and am satisfied your
CHERRY PECTORAL saved me.
HORACE FAlRBBOTHER."
Rockingham, Vt, July 10, 1852.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25
AYERS
Cherry Pectoral.

No other complaints are so insidious in their
attack as those affecting the throat and lungs:
none so trihed with by the majority of suffer-
ers. The ordinary cough or cold, resulting
perhaps from a trilng or unconscious ex-
posure, is often but the beginning Of fatal
sickness. AYERS CHERRY PEcToRAL has
well proven its efficacy in a forty years fight
with throat and lung diseases, and should be
taken in all cases without delay.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25

breast
She is ly ng asleep.
Dreaming Of pleasures and love and gold,
Careless Of sorrows that life may hold
With sweet lips smiling in perfect rest,
She is lying asleep
H.
With faded hands folded on quiet breast
She is lying asleep,
Pleasures and love and joy all past,
Sorrows OF life over at last
With pale lips closed in eternal rest,
She is lying asleep.
-CHAs. f. SCoTT in the Current
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1887-03-25

The Kings palace in Corea is now
iighted with electricity.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1887-05-26
QlIiIIs.

The man who "takes the floor
should be careful to return IT,
Speaking ofqueensware, we can
say they do. See bow long Queen
Victoria wears.
A ringing speech-"Will you
marry mei'
One might think row tary mo
ton would be the best for oarsman.
but it isn't.
Speaking of eating" observed
Mrs. .Jipso, "you just ought to see
how fond my husband is of corn.
He'll just eat nothing but green
corn in the summer, and canned
corn and hominy in the winter. In
fact, he's regular corniverous ami
NAL.
In his invitation to the Queen OF
the Sandwich Islands to visit Bos.
ton, Mayor O'Brien addressed her
as Your Royal Highness" instead
of Your Majesty" The Boston
papers are apologlzing for him, urg.
ing IN extenuation that che has very
little experience with Queens"
Some one ought TO teach Mr.. O'Bri-
en- TO play whist.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1887-05-26
Our Life.

Born Mt n certain stage on the eternal
now OF time, we are carried "A little
while down It's current, the longest life
mere breath, "A dot, then we disap-
pear from the surface, To be no longer
seen OF men, and the stream conhIrfies
TO How almost needless of our HAVING
lived. AS entities we have birth: ns
entities we die; nothing remains of
our Individual existences. but n fleet
ing memory, for they who remember
us soon pass away.
Whence came we? Whittier are we
tendingp Ahl who can tellY Some
profess TO know, but they know not.
W mere have last summeT's roses gomez
what VIII become of yon dry leaf torn
from its parent stem by this wintry
Dlastp Like us, they disappear and are
merged into the ocean of matter from
which they are evolved, ready to be
recombiued into new forms Of beauty,
Tor although individual existences per
ish, matter IL imperishable; having had
no birth, IL will have no death. Like
time and space, II Is infinite and etern-
al.
Brought forth into this world with
out being consulted. We are buried out
OF IT without our consent. Like that
leaf which was the hope OF spring, the
pride and glory of summer, we are
rudely torn away, the sort OF destiny,
TO return the clements OF Nature from
which we sprung; dust to dust Chi
cago Sentinel.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1887-05-26
Handy Thugs to Know.

Here are some figures and rules
very handy to know and have a;
hand, in the mind or on PAPER:
a rod is I64 feet or 81 yards.
a mile is 32orods.
a mile ISL 100 yards.
a mile is $3.50 feet.
a square foot is IA square inches.
a square yard contains Q square
feet.
a SCARE rod is 2724 square feet.
An acre contains 1850 square
feet.
An acre contains 4,S4o square
yards.
An acre contains 80 square rods.
a section or square mile, con.
tains 64o acres.
A quarter section contains 100
acres.
An acre is s rods wide and 20
rods long.
An acre is 10 rods wide by 70
rods long.
An acre is about 2o3 feet square.
a solid foot contains I,728 solid
inches.
a pint Of water weighs pound.
a solid foot Of water weighs OH
pounds.
a gallon Of water holds z3I solid
inches.
A gallon ofmilk weighsS s pounds
and 10 ounces.
A pint Of water holds zSz solid
inches (z8.S75).
a barrel (3ll gallons) holds A
solid feet (4.z1D.
a solid foot contains nearly u
solid pints (748).
a bushel (stuck) contains Ago
solid inches.
a bushel (heaping) contains u
stuck bushels.
A stuck bushel contains about "a
solid feet.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1887-05-26
Fate of the Apostles.

The following brief history of
the fate of the Apostles may be new
TO those whose reading has not
been evangelical:
St Matthew is supposed to have
suffered martyrdom or was slain
with a sword at the city OF Ethiopia.
st. Mark was dragged through
the streets OF Alexandra, into Egvpt.
till he expired.
st. Luke was hanged upon an
olive tree in Greece.
St. John was put into a cauldron
of boiling oil at Rome and escaped
death, He afterwards died natur.
al death at Ephesus, in Asia.
St. James, the Great was beheaded
at Jerusalem.
st. lanes the Less was thrown
from a pinnacle or wing Of the tenn.
pie, and then beaten to death with
fuller's club.
st. Philip was hanged up against
a pillar at IIieraPolis, a city Of
Phrysia.
St. Bartholomew was flayed alive
by the command of a barbarous
King.
st. Andrew as bound to cross.
whence he preached unto the peo.
pie till he expired.
81. Thomas was run through the
body with a lance at Cormandel in
the East Indies.
St. Jude was shot to death with
arrows.
ST. Simon Zealot was crucilied
in Persia.
St Matthias was first stoned ard
then beheaded.
st. Barnabus was stoned 10 death
by the Jews at Salania.
81. Paul was beheaded at Rome
by the tyrant Nero.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1887-05-26
Words of Wisdom.

Happiness is where it is found
and seldom where il is sought.
Some people are like boys rock
ing horse; full of motion, but nc
progress.
Speak little, and speak well, il
YOU would 6e looked upon as man
of merit.
An open mind, an open hand,
and an open heart, will everywhere
find an open door.
fretfulness OF temper will gener.
ally characterize those who are neg.
ligent OF order.
Remember that valuable as is the
gilt of speech, the gift of silence is
often more precious.
The way of truth is like great
road. IL is not difficult to know IL
The evil is only that man will not
seek IT. Do you go home and
search for il.
Employment which Galen calls
Natures physician" is so essential
to human happiness that Incidence
is Justly considered the mother Of
misery.
God made both tears and LAUGH.
ter, and both FOR kind purpose; for as
laughter enables mirth and surprise
to breathe freely, so tears enable sor.
row to vent itself patiently. Tears
hinder sorrow from becoming de.
spair and madness.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1887-05-26
MANY Signs of Rain

If moles cast up hills, IL will rain.
1T swallows fly lower than usual.
expect rain.
If the crickets sing louder than
usual, it will rain.
If frogs and toads croak more
than usual, expect more rain.
1T the convolvulus and chick weed
close, there will be rain.
If the cats lick their bodies and
wash their faces, it will rain.
If the cock crows more than usu.
al and earlier, expect rain.
IL worms creep out Of the ground
IN great numbers, expect rain.
If cattle leave of feeding and
chase each other in their pastures,
il will rain.
Ifseabirds fly toward land and
land birds toward the sea, there will
be rain.
II the mafigolds continue shut
after 7 o'clock in the evening, ex
Dcctrain.
IL the bees remain in their hives
or fly but a short distance from
them, IL will rain.
IL the crows make a great deal
Of noise and fly round and round,
expect rain.
II water fowls scream more than
usual and plunge into the water
expect rain,
IL the leaves Of the trees move
without any perceptible wind, rain
may be expected.
ID the fish bite more readily and
gambOl near the surface Of streams
and ponds, it viii rain.
10 sheep and goats spring about
in the meadows and fight more than
usual, expect rain.
If peacock aud guinea fowls
scream and turkeys gobble. and 10
quails make more noise than usual.
there will be rain.
IL horses stretch out their necks
and sniff the air and assemble in the
corner Of field with their heads 90
the leeward. il will rain.
If smoke from chimncvs blow
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1887-05-26
Nieandcring.

n city girl writes: ut is a fond
dream of mine to become farmers
Vile, and meander with him down
MES howery pathway" All. YES.
that rs nice thing to dream about
ou: when you have lived ON the
farm and followed this meandering
business Tor a month or so, you will
discover wide chasm between the
dream and the reality. You viii
think of this about the time your
husband meanders Off and leaves
YOU without wood, and you have to
meander up and down the lane pull
ling splinters off the fence with
which to cook dinner. And when
you mcander around in the wet clio.
yer in search Of the cows, YOU will
have a dim perception that fond
dreams do not always pan out a
hundred cents on the dollar, and
that there are several meanderinps
IN farm life that are not listed in
the dreaming category. The me-
andcring business on the farm is
not what it is cracked up to be-
Kansas Ctty Squi6.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1887-05-26
Relating Their Experience.

81 had big surprise yesterday, ''
observed 4 Kalamazoo man TO a
friend.
"How sof" ssked the latter.
"Why, my wife called me dar-
ling"
"You don't say! Well, was
surprised myself last week. NV
wife came near calling me honey. -
What did she sayi"
"She said ] was an old humbug."
How was that near calling YOU
honey?"
Doesn't lee make honeyi"
"Yes, but what has a bee to do
with iti"
And isn'ta bee hum bug"
Eyes, its my treat