The Dickinson press., 1887-05-21
PHASE OF CLUB LIFE.
THE lDloSYNcRAslEs OF VARIOUS
TYPICAL MEMBERS.

concerns the walters, who arc slow, careless,
stupid. His orders arc always filled contrary
TO ElS directions, yet invcsti CATION reveals
that II there WAS any carclcsSMcSs it was his
own III not giving explicit Instructions. lIo
can always get everything he wants much
better and cheaper outside of the club. lIc
continually threatens to resign, hut never
does. lie regularly predicts the decline and
dissolution of the club Ilr soon alonatcs the
fratcrlal esteem of the lrttcr class of men,
bers, and tho others quietly make butt of
him, and he takes their gno,l !lunorcd defer
cnco to his sadly ventilated iticas as an evil
dcncc of Ills popularity and Importance OF
course they arc omly "guying' him, as Adonis
woull say
The sool natured apolo.sist is on offset to
the groMler, and at the same timo Us much of
common nuisance rs he always sounds the
same i:i!iSrrininato praises, and only needs
an audience I" deliver 81 little Grafton on this
or th''t subject that liapnens To be under dis
cussion. In Lis opinion tho club is the best
and l'casantest in the world The gossper
or rrattcrhoX is, of course, found in tho
cll''s hut hc is more sln.r',ily cxtin;suislrd in
the lmtlr community than in the village hy q
general ce:isarr. AS long as liz confines HIM
sell te detailing the scandals i'll other clubs or
OF society lic generally has Il following whom
he nlnus"s and interests lv his recitals, which
are invariably inaccurate. His tendency,
however, leads him To rcc,lr to ioculur scenes
i'll the club which hy tarit consent all tho
participants seek TO keep private, and so he
involves himself i'll explanations which ccn-
orally result in his reform Som prudential
motives or Ills resignation because lie has
more enemies than friends in the club. When
he contracts th" ungemtlemunly aud knavish
habit of overhcaring conversations and after
ward olutling TO the subject lie wears u rope
which soon fiSulunively hangs linn.
"TiIE NEWSPAPER FIENn."
There is also the "nHwspnrer flend," who
selfishly gathers all the pa;y"rs latest maga-
zines about him. The 'lisputatinus member
who always disa%rccS, is soon 50 cmrlatcally
'sa; down upon" that he sul,sidrs The man
who seeks to back all Of his assertions or to
settle all questions ly lct; is generally en-
trapped by tho sportivr, ocular clement, so
that he soon learns wisdom and prudence
Tho membership may lc divided into three
classes, the se;lutc, the conventional, and the
progressive in tue yourgr. clubs, and into
two in the NOR" ortl,"Gl'x climbs, tho consrr-
vativc and tho progressive. As Il rule mem
beis frequent their clubs for social rccr,a-
ti"ii, to conllnn" with their friends therein,
to read tho papers OF nta%azim"s, to while
nway tho time in tho billiard or card room,
and each develops an individuality that is
soon recognized, SO That it is safe To predict
just what chair hc will ocr,p;-, what co;l.s,.
he will take OH coming in, whether he will
sprl, tn" "'5,uion of t,n library or the "lif"
of the lilliaryl room, with is generally tl.,,
livc"st place in the club. Tho various
cotsrirs of the little community always offer
association. These cot~res are dull or
NivaIious according To their personality
There is always n circle nl,ont the I:,ro!ltcnr
in clubs where there arc limos there is
generally singing and playing in the evening
Til" l'iin!o is not permitted in tho orthodox
clubs. 1t savors of the concert ball Tier"
is often some very gna: playing and singing
al these impronltu nnls!"a"S 'I'i" c'inr,i ,c,
nrc especially stirring For the tim" the
musical cotcric rules, hut they seldom become
Objectionable, unless to the chronic growlcr
The accommodations enable cnc!l cotrrc to
Keep to themselves if SO disposed: that is,
tho" who wish quiet can secure il in the
library pr parors T:orc is rcnclullya com
mon resort, and there the piano is generally
situated, and liquid refreshments are served
General g"o'ifclowshii prevails lirrr. Tho
stories ar" told for the r,liiicati"u of all. The
conventional nrlctonc of general convcrsa
,ion is not Observed. Every on" talks pro
bono pubico, or at ail cHonts thinks lie docs
ii tlIni" is any musical talent il is lrvclo,,oc
Ev'lybN!,' is pleased ut the informal gather
io.s except tilc irpwor. II" is unrcrcmoni.
oii-.- mad. tIi" butt of the crowd.
TIE MAN or MICH MAIL.
There Is one other member vino always rr-
ce%"s "a good naturrd shot from all whom he
nG'cHls. lie is the on" who has 50 large -
i.rlil that the box bearing his initials is al
ways crowded with his letters. AS Il rule the
mail i'll Il club is comparatively light con-
shrrines the membership, as only the limited
nunhcr Of frcquentins members have their
letters udress,'l there. The letter lrml is
Tire companion Of III" newspaper G"n'l. He is
generally n retired ltl.iM.s, man, and not u
literary ineniber, as might be supposed Not
witlstanling the check system there is ID
ways so,.le good nat,ircd dispute about cx-
changed Ii'', and un.',scilas, and once in n
while the erercoats 1e. inixo!-g' ncrally
after ,l,livrry-nnl strunt" ,locmcnts are
fpl.nl in the pockets tr n.x; r!pllling The
near sighted men do moi max" t!n. absurd
mistakes that generally ;,t,tibn'y to them,
bat they contribute their qnol. to the general
amusement hJ their unconar:ots LAUNDERING.
Tie rl"n "itli bad memories FOR names and
faces create more trouble. TEey always get
everything wrong. They often cause much
confusion by their mistakes. The married
men are the stcadeSt Attendant, outside Of
the l;,bitreS j, j, cnl,tat.l tl.;.t during the
llst year Of married bliss nothing will be seen
Of the member, but nft'r that lie comes |
around again, ull is once more one of the
boys. This, however. is legend. Tho prac-
tical joker docs not flourish III TIE club rs in |
tle community at large because lis range is