Morning journal and courier., 1887-10-22
ECONOMICAL.

Take care of the pence and one fool thing
or another will take care of your pounds. -
Oil City Blizzard.
els your father Christian?" asks the new
minister. "No," replied the boy, che sings
in the choir. brooklyn Eagle.
A Texas paper advertises for "a irst-class
driving horse for lady that must be young
and gentle and easy to manage. Texas Sift-
ings.
neither do I spin, and I'll bet my boots that
Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed
like me."-Philadelphia Call.
''Isn't it dreadful" asked Miss Lilybud,
'fto run over mang' eyes, indeed, mum, u
replied the stoker of the express; sit iolts
the engine up worse nor cow"
''Do unto others as you imagine they would
do unto you under the same circumstances, u
is sort of brass rule more in use than the
golden artiele.-New Orleans Picayune.
Britisher Ito Miss Bunker of Boston, )-'sI
hasn't much of a navy" Miss Bunker
'tNo sir; but she has something of yachty.''
Sun.
Citizen Ito sheriff)-'I suppose, Mr.. Sell
lemout, that the execution of a murderer is
not only a most unpleasant duty, but one
somewhat difficult to successfully perform as
wella' Sherif-s'Not after you get the hang
of it. !" --s.
Our society-She (whose grandfather made
it in iron )-"Why did you bow to those
Bartletts?" He (an old chum of BartIett) -
"What's the use of snubbing people because
you're little better than they area" IN. B,
| bartlett married poor" and is a clerk on
81 800 year. r.)-Life.
Why he was afraid-Street car conductor
| Ito countryman)-"If you saw him picking
the gentleman's pocket why didn't you in
- 1E La L.
Countryman-'tI saw that sign up there
| Beware of pickpockets,' an, b'gosh, I was
'fraid Exchange.
What panied him most.-"Kicked you
| out, did he?" sympathized q friend with a
| walking delegate who had found himseli
suddenly projected to the sidewalk in from
| of e manufacturing establishment. eyes
but that wasn't the worst of it." 'tNo?" "What
| pains me most is the act that the boot he
kicked me with wasn't union made. Puck.
The struggles of conscientious child in
| its efforts to be truthful are sometimes pa
| thetic. Myrtle, at the age of two, was very
fond of playing with the articles upon hel
mothers dressing case, and had been forbid
den to do So One day she was absent in
the bedroom for some ,ime, returning with a
| guilty face. No question was asked but af-
| ter period of inward conflict, the little one
remarked: There was picture in one glass
of little Myrtle touching oor fngs."-Baby-
hood.
"Gentlemen," thundered the judge to the
| contending lawyers, ''this case must be set
| tied before the court adjourns. There has
been dillydallying enough. Well, what is
ita" he said, turning to court attendant
| who had ventured to bespeak the judicial at
tention, 'I am very busy" ga couple of
political friends of yonrs,'' whispered the at
tendant, care outside waiting for you to
join 'em." "Upon further consideration, y
| said his honor, ''I declare this court ad-
journed until tomorrow at II o'clock p
The Epoch.
Mrs. Pompano-I declare, 1 am SO worried
about our church fair. I am afraid that it
| will be failure.
Mrs. Bargley--Is it possible there are NO
oysters in the city?
"Oysters! It isn't that. Mr. Kewpon, the
| chairman of the church committee, insists
that there shall be no games of chance, be-
| cause they are wicked"
"Perhaps can persuade him to withdraw
| his objections. Where can I find Mr.. Kew
pon2"
'On Third street. He is a stock broker ,
I-Philadelphia Call