davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register., 1887-06-30
UNCLE SILE'S FOURTH.
TOriginal.l


I mind bacl, in Maine if ye said man lied
He was for settin' right down an argutn' 1t
out,
But here If We happen to let that word slide
He's for knockin' We down an kicken' ye
bout.
OF this snap jes drap
Was born in my Saraett's spirit no doubt
bachelor was an widder was she,
A widder of uncommon peartaess OF pace,
With high-strung nose that was lovely to see
An eyes that burnt stiddy as stars in 'er face,
Though in time they'd jes shine
AS meller as moons when I'd pass by 'er
place.
Then, whether by chance or by plan TIL not say,
She presently rented the house next to me,
A cot 'an big yard where her offsprings could
play,
Two twins full of war r-whoops, chained-ngntnln
an glee;
That I'd ache for loves sake
Was q raw an exceedingly plain thing to see.
For honey an love are alike in one thing,
They grippe if conditions ain't jes about square,
Still we gether the roses an let the tnorns
sting
In fac the more stingers the more we get
there,
AS with me when see
She was sot round with thorns she seemed
doubly fair.
dreamed of her nights, an sich dreams as was
soft
A kind of mixed haze, meller twilight, an
hair,
An I'd waken plum crazy, settln' up OFT
Jes huggin' myself like a loonafed bear,
An I'd thrill an git chill,
An my best pantaloons was all could wear.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

Ikep bees, so Civ the widder hive,
An presented the twins game chickens an
toys,
An they burnt down my barn an dug up my
drive,
All for fun, understan', an KEEP sich a noise
Neighbors moved, as beloved;
Still courted the widder an them air two
boys
But politics split at last like wedge,
Like wedges, also. we was cold-save at heart
Least was warm there an ready to hedge,
But it takes smart doctor to heal sich
smart,
An we cooled an ies fooled
Till at last we seemed splintered entirely
apart.
My doctrine was somewhat at fault expect,
For arGs bit coolish to ole Uncle Sam,
For things ID not gone to my mind jes correct,
An sometimes, fac ofen, I couldn't keeI
cam,
Then she'd rile and jes bile
An so with our tongues we'd thrash an ker
lam.
Then she got 'er flag an raised 1t on high
An KEEP it afyin' above her coal-bin,
AS If to betolen her body might die
But to doctrines like mine she'd never Civ in
An the twins raised wild dins
On drums made OF nail-kegs head-ended with
tin.
There's nothing that tares one SO all into string:
AS bein' at outs with the one We adore;
WV walked in my sleep an said awful things
An slept in my boots an got yeller an pore,
An my head got like lead
An each hair in it pulled an my liver got sore
Then made up my mind surely must die
If soon with the widder didn't get straight;
But time to my help brought the Fourth OF July
An focused us in from our scatterized state
Though thought it had brought
last lay cam el-Dacko(
fate.
With "lemo" an sweat Write dresses, an
dust;
| To the aged a vast an uncomfortable stew,
The world to the young on its annual bust
AS for me, am free
To declare I'd thought it a thing to be kussed
The TWINS turned out early, an land OF tn
| bravel
Before half an hour seemed goin' insane,
| An plugged up my hearing my reason to save;
But things KEEP affirm inside of my brain,
An my hair pulled like care
An earth seemed tippin' an twistin' In pain
Jes then big swarm OF my bees they took flight
An I snatched up q pan an rushed throug
| the door,
An yelled ik Mohawk to make 'em alight
| An run lookin' uppards, an made the pa
| roar,
The widder's swarmed, too, an outside sh
jeS tore.
She'd a biler pom which she smote with ciu
An each twin flung gravel an yelled like
clown,
An, though didn't see, she fell over tub
An then in bucket of soapsuds slid down,
While caught all unsought
My chin on clothes-line an hung like
| houn.
But drapped in trice an got up an run
An yelled an slung dirt like plum loonate1
When all of a suddent things generally spun
AS / banged into somethin' that sp1intere
my specks,
| For We see her an me
Run into one nuther jes fit to break necksl
Ny arms went around her, my nose in er ear,
An down in the biler suddenly sat,
With her in my lap jes as if in cheer,
With my pan jammed onto her head like
hat
1t was rich, an all sich,
But ruther cramped quarters to lovingly cha
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

scuff1e behind him caused him quickly
to turn. Before he could comprehend
what had happened, he was felled
senseless by blow from the butt of
musket A man darted from the street
into the alley. The Lieutenant, per-
ceiving halt, and seeing the con-
fusion, hurried from the flank OF
the company up to the head,
and found that the prisoner
had escaped. (which way?" he
Iron County register., 1887-06-30
TTo BE Continued


"A good mother of this city was
Mortified the other day when her little
daughter informed her that she had
her hair cut at the blacksmith-shop.
When asked to explain she replied:
'.Mr. Smith cut my hair, and he is
black, isn't he?"-Burlinoto Free
Press,
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30
DAUGHTERS OF eve.


Mrs. NJ. Louise Thomas, president Of Soro-
sis, Is bee keeper, and gathers 10, 900 pounds
Of honey year.
Little Miss Lizzie Bell Sinclair, of Everitts-
town, n j., celebrated her twelfth birthday
recently by completing bed quilt that con-
tains II ,210 pieces.
Belva Lockwood has annexed TO her law
office at Washington bureau for finding
wives for men who are too busy to spend
their time in counting.
Queen Victoria keeps always in her private
apartment statuette of the lamented John
Brown, which goes Wherever the queen her
self travels Its usual place is on her private
writing desk.
On Jenny Lind's coffin was placed by Mr..
GoIdschmidt wreath Of myrtle made from
tree planted years ago by the great singer
herself in the shape Of a tiny twig plucked
from her wedding wreath.
Before going to Oak View TO dine Thanks
giving Day Mrs. Cleveland directed the send
ing of flowers from the White House conser-
yatory to the Central Union mission and to
several churches and charitable institutions.
Miss Susan b. Anthony Is engaged in organ
izing woman suffrage clubs at various points
in Indiana, and her appeals and personal eff
forts have resulted in many acccssions to tho
army Of women who believe they have q
right to vote
Milwaukee has bowling club Of eighteen
fair damsels who practice religiously seven
times week and have become strong and
robust from the exercise. They are very ex-
pert at the game aud confidently expect to
vanquish any club OF gentlemen that may
challenge them.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30
rha nrI in Central Africa.

tThe OWL writes my correspondents, 'is
esteemed by most tribes In this region OF Lii
kiinga as a bird Of Ill omen. II is, indeed
credited with being the bearer Of an evil
spirit which is sometimes sent by an enemy
or evil disposed person to work mischief.
For example, one day the king Of Hangar.
pakn ian old rascal who will one day have
to give an account of many deed Of blood
shed and poisoning visited the Livingstone
Inland mission, his face the very picture of
misery and despair. What has happenedF
he was asked. There was long silence. In
whisper he replied that the people OF a
neighboring town had, during tho night,
sent bad bird, N'Kissi OF spirit in tho
shape Of an owl, which had bewitched his
plantain trees near one Of his houses, and
Ind bi;rh.cd them. Tho missionary asked
how the king knew that the bad spirit had
come. He replied, still in mysterious whis-
Der, that he had heard it, What had he
heardg 1T was like a Bird he said, and he
described the whirring noise Of the flight Of
an owl; adding that directly afterward his
plantain trees were blighted. Upon exam
lining the trees the missionary found they
had been injuriously affected. 1t was as II
they had been struck with lightning. Every
one Of them was blaclsened and apparently
dead
GAS this occurred In the long dry season,
when lightning is almost unknown, the mis-
chief had been done by some chemical agency,
probably only known TO the NGanga or med
icine man The old king begged for some
smundili, or white man medicine, TO counter
act the influence of the bad spirit. The mis-
sionary produced some Keating's insect pow
der. 1t was explained to the king that the
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30
BRIGHT SAYINGS oF CHILDREN.

Scene Thanksgiving dinner, everybody
commenting on the immense size Of the
turkey. An appalling silence fell upon the
crowd when Tommy cried out; Mamma,
is that the old sore headed turkey '-Athens
(Ga.) Womanls Work.
Our little ones grandmother was eating
some berries from a saucer, and walked
about holding them so high that baby could
not tell what they were. Finally she brought
a chair, saying; Grandma, you are tired;
sit down. ATHENS (Ga.l Woman's Work.
A little curly headed girl was walking
about one Sunday afternoon in her garden.
A little neighbor called to her to come over
and play. She refused, but upon being urged
to come looked up with quite sad and indig-
nant face, and exclaimed; "Whatl I play on
Sunday Don't you know this is Gods day,
and it's the only day he's gotp -Babyhood.
My little nephew, aged Q, writes lady,
was fond Of playing cars by running along,
putting and whistling IN iinitation OF the
engine One day | CHANGED to step in his
way as ho was going at full speed He
stopped, and instead Of requesting me to give
him the right Of way, remarked solemnly:
sThe engine will wait till that COW gets OH
the track -Babyhood.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30
PENNS YLVANIA RAILROAD
BELVIDERE DIVISION
Lsmbertyille, April 18th, iss7-ly

,,.,,.,
Trains TOR Nefo foTH osto fHts@"etPHto
-, .s--'...,.. r-t,.h M !. :, "a ,,oo .oo
Lesy ,s Mannnka CHUNK NV M and i''2o' a-2O
anu ooo ~. a 20 q. -. a DC
Leave bciyidere 'oo m, ana iz.z'' 40 ana 900
~. pxt,,,..h,, oe ona m 4 <, ana
Leave fhiiiipspurg '.zc m'and i'oV' s'oz ana
fvo ~ 20 ,oa IN /. a,
Leave rfenchto"h 100 i"' i'"", '.@% "n" 80"
ln 49,,
Leave fienihgton 81 ~ y ~ Ivy ~ ahu 80 = IN
Arrve LamoeItviile oczV =. i so anu 20 III
Leave bampertViiie f.oo any GOV M @'oo, o'oo'
and SOf M
Arrive Trenton 7.4o anu BOB M z'az' o'So' ana
o.5a ~ <y.,., $500 n 20
Arrive Philadelphia (kensington) BIO and s.oS
IN. 4.O7, 300 IN, ana lz.lJ nignt, ,.,,. a.
Arrive Philadeipnla tbfoaa streetotatiohj $50
and y.b5 m, 800, % ana 55v M
Arrive New York. via trenton, y.zO ana lo-4u
n. 4-bu, 300, ana lo.So m.
Trasms from philadelphia and Reic York
$500, - 49, -. rr.an.on > % ,,,a
Leave va ~ = ~ ~ -" o"' -'' it.iV III
<'y's ozo snu ~ T.. ;un.,n,,,7 an - 30 os
ios !, 3, "a ~ =, iAoo'
PhsiaieInbia BROAD street station, 90
aos 20 y, q ~ a pna ~ q M :, \, ''oo
n, iz.v1l ~ soo os VVo 9o ko os
~ A's"'on s'0' : 'A '''''' @i1 w.
Arrive LamOertville s4'a M 1855 AS S.a4 and
Leave Lamoertviiie ior remington '.4s a M z'o'
I, y.y prIemington 2s5 and 55s M
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30
destruction OF tho phylloxera.

DIR. GLENN incorporates with the soil
sulphides and carbonates which easily under
go decomposition, preferably those Of potas-
stun. PEAT which has been made to absorb
sulphuric, nitric or phosphoric acid is then
also introduced. The acid gradually acts
upon the sulphide and the carbonate, liber-
ating sulphuretted hydrogen and carbonic
acid in tho soil. These two gases, according
to the experiments OF DR.. Eyrich, of Mann
helm, are rapidly and uniformly distribu-
underground stage, as we'll as to Colorado
beetles, field mice, moles, etc. The potash
remains in the soil us snlphate, nitrate or
phosphate The question is whether useful
animals, such as earthworms, bumblebees,
carnivorous ground beetles, ETC., will not be
destroyed also. Scientific American
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30
PLAYS AND ACTORS.

New York is filed with disengaged actors,
and there will DO more after the holidays.
Mrs James Brown Potter has decided TO
add "Romeo and Juliet to her repertoire.
Coquelin, the French actor, now playing
in England, sails Tor the United States in May.
J. M. Hill denies that he has secured
Helen Barry for a tour of the United States
Abbey and his partners will bring the
Royal Sake Mciningen players here In Janu-
airy, 1889,
Robert Manchester, perhaps the oldest
song and dance man on the American stage,
Is worth more than $4,000.
Lotta's farewell tour win begin year
hence, If she does not by that time reconsider
her determination to retire.
Lotta's mother says that the bright little
actress Is going TO give 100000 for the
founding of nn orphan asylum.
"Anarchyn is to be put on tour late In De-
cember IL viii be done for u few weeks OIL
the road, preparatory to its opening at the
new Broadway theatre, New York.
Mr.. Irvings tour includes Philadelphia
Chestnut Street opera house, Dec. ~; Chi
cago McViclzer's theatre, Dec. %; Boston,
York, Feb. 20.
Fay Templeton is in New York, and will
probably soon be seen again on the stage.
1t Is said that recent losses incurred by her
husband, Howell Osborn, made her return
to the profession advisable.
"Mazulm," Mr.. Kiralfy says, will cost
$4,000, and the expense Of each perform
ance will DO. about 81 600. He promises to
mako an honest effort Go revive the glories Of
the famous Ravel family. Mr.. Arnold
| KiraIfy will play an important part in the
piece, and the production win enlist tho
services Of $50 people on the stage.
Fanny Davenport, who owns the Ameri-
can rights of Ella Tosca,n Sardou's latest
drama, has made Messrs. French and Sanger
proposition to open the new Broadway
theatre In New York with grand produc-
| ton of the play. Mr.. Sanger has said that
the proposition would probably be accepted,
and IL SO, that the opening would occur In
| the latter part of February.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30
professional wilma Tasters.

DR.. Donnet, physician in the asylum at
Bordeaux, in paper published in The An
males Medico- Psychologiques, commentsupon
the effects of alcohol upon the animal econ
omy when taken continuously, and even in
small amount. He particularly calls atten-
ton to the fact that professional wine tasters,
who, in order to preserve their delicacy OF
taste, must never swallow any wine, but spit
it out and then rinse the mouth thoroughly
with water, eventually suffer the same dis
eases OF the head and stomach as those who
are habitual drunkards. Chicago Tribune.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30
LIGHT AND AIRY.
Whx nId Ha Stands

Why Did He stand?
Why stood he on the burning deck,
Why did he act like THAR
Was it blu.1 amid the wreck,
Or did the boy stand pats
What better thing for him to do
In that too rudy place
Than try TO Oil by drawing to
The flush upon his face,
Unless he had hand to show
Him fixed beyond douhtS
But what it was we'll never know;
He never played it out,
Poor boyl whom Mrs. Hemans sung;
His luck, at best, was slim;
'TNsere better far had some one rung
a cold deck in on him.
Chicago Tribune
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30
-coNsrANcy.

Tbefc may bs cruel constancy, and faith
Which mandates the heart, and such my fate
Far long, sad years tin death itself hath swept
The saeriiical altar all too late.
All we'll l kept the faith pledged, and arm glad
To think It now. for in some far on sphere,
He who through mine absence loved me- knows
Inever consciously have wronged him here.
But retrihuton smiles and mocks at tears
Aud the dark heavens are pitiless above
While my heart cheated through the empty years,
Paints meath its burden and cries out for love.
Lizzie Petit Cutler in Home Journal.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30
why she Feared 1t.

HUSBAND general war in Europe this
coming year would be dreadful thing.
Wife who contemplates trip Abroad
Yes, indeed. 1t would 50 interfere with our
plans for the summer The Epoch.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30

Timid Young Suitor who has won consent
Of papa)--And now may ask you, sir,
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. your daughter has any
domestic accomplishments
Papa tsarcastically) sir; she some
times knits her brows. Detroit Free Press.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30
How He Got ,Ens.

How came you by that broken nose, pray,
How came upon your face that cruel SCARF
called upon an editor one day
last winter, and left his door ajar.
Boston Courier.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30
Kerosene Kate.

He scraped away the messy spray
And scratched amid the lichen green,
Until he read: Kate Kelly, dead,
Aged twenty-seyen. Kerosene.v
Texas siftings
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30

1t takes 1890, 900 gallons Of oil a year to
keep the railways Of Great Britain going,
and the cost is nearly $2,000,o00.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30

Too Much of q Good Thing, Etc.
They re tired OF turkey, goose and pie;
They're sick OF celery green's.
And once again they sadly sigh
For hash ard pork aud beeus.
Hotel Mail.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30

Coyotes are so numerous and troublesome
in Yolo county, Cal, that bounty Of $50
scalp is offered by the county authorities
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1887-11-30
GUY FAWKES DAY.
CELEBRATING THE FIFTH OF NO.
MEMBER IN ENGLAND.

How "thc Gunpowder Treason and Plot"
Arc Remembered and Observed In an
English vlllage-Noisy as an American
ssFourtl, of July"
The San Saba news. [volume] (San Saba, Tex.) 1873-1966, 1887-07-08

Pounding on the anchor made noise
much better than none, but it could be
heard only a short distance and was not
at all satisfactory.
1t so happened that among the vessels
stores the cabtain had a live pig, which
he allowed to run around on deck.
Presently the men on the schooner
heard in the distance, beating against tho
water, the wheels of a steamer. which
seemed TO be running directly for their
little vessel They ali screamed at the
tops Of their voices, for in five minutes
they expected to be struggling in the
water.
Suddenly it occurred to the captain
that the shrill squcal OF pig could be
heard a long distance, and quick as
thought he set one of the men pinching
the pigs tail with pair of nippers. The
Pig IN response TO each pinch belched
forth most blood-curdling shrek, which
Travelled far out into the fog.
The steamboat came nearer and nearer
very. slowly. It's captain. family dis
cerning the outlines of the schooner
through the fog, and thinking it was his
nephew's vessel, shouted in a deep gut
teral voice: 'Chris, is that YOUR Yes
replied Captain Crosby. "Well. l am
glad Of that, - growled the uncle, '.for
thought / was running ashore and right
INTO hog-yard.-Americ1n Magazine.
The San Saba news. [volume] (San Saba, Tex.) 1873-1966, 1887-07-08
Snakes rs Food.

To the average person snake would
not be an attractive article of diet ex-
cept in the last stages of starvation.
Snakes have been eaten by Asiatics and
Europeans, however, who had not reached
this extremity. Buckland tells of a
young English woman who ate several
snakes eggs which she found on a shelf
in greenhouse where he had placed
them in order to see if the heat of the sun
would bring forth the young snakes. She
thought they were sugar plums which
the cook had put in the greenhouse. No
bad effects resulted, although the young
woman became slightly i'll soon after
eating them.
To the bushmen of Australia the flesh
of snakes is something of dclicacy. 1t
is eaten also by the natives of India. The
Digger Indians of the southwestern polk
ton of the United States like snakes, it Is
said, as a diet, and stories are told o!
white hunters in the Western wilderness
often sustaining life for days by feeding
on snakes which they killed, the ordinary
varieties of game not being obtainable at
the time.
l1uNhLhlNr WIZ iilotS AAAdh UNIV AT hSNA
boa constructor and crocodile, thought the
taste of each was very far from being I'M
pleasant. His father William, the
geologist, and high dignitary Of the
Church of England), with physician of
the anatomy school at Christ Church,
Oxford, also made part of meal off the
latter species of reptile. The flesh was
pronounced to be excellent. The croco-
die, however, had bad effects on the
stomach of one person who ate of it, but
this was because that person devoured,
according to Buckland's testimony, about
as much of it as five men ought to eat of
any kind of meat. The meat was so sweet
that he could not restrain himself until
he was gorged, although he knew all the
time that it was crocodile. GLOje-Den0-
The San Saba news. [volume] (San Saba, Tex.) 1873-1966, 1887-07-08
The HEART OF MAN.

A marvellous loom is the human heart
As II "eaves and weaves through sunny dsvs:
IL taxes the flower by the mountain stn,au,.
Inc TINT Of dawn and the globe Of dev.
Inc ioreSt-leaf and the moonlight rleap1
And 1t weaves a web Of roseate hua.
And man looks down at the fabrics shear
And says, D the world is fair, ween-
To live is joy for me.
A marvellous loom is the human heart
As 1t weaves and weayes through drearv
days;
1t takes the branch Of a withered tree
And the paIlid gray OF the shimmerinS
rain,
The thnnder-pall and the frozen lea,
And weaves & web with many a stain:
And man looks down with cry OF despair
And says, o the world is round Of care
To live is sorrow for me.
a marvellous loom is the human heart
As it weaves and weaves, though under the
mould;
Forout OF the moisture, and out Of the earth,
And out Of the seed germs nesting near,
1t weaves, in spite of its own hfe-dearth,
\ web of meaning above its bier;
And the light-winged soul to far dawn flies
While the heart speaks on to unseeing eyes
To die is yet to live
a marvellous loom is the human heart,
For it weaves and weaves through the worlf
Of thought;
In joy and sorrow, in life, in death,
An intricate cipher for man TO know;
From his early smile to his latest breath
He holds the key for his use below,
But rarely yIsc is the one who learns;
What the heart has taken, the heart returns.
TIL the cycle Of God is done.
kate Z. Clark.
The San Saba news. [volume] (San Saba, Tex.) 1873-1966, 1887-07-08
A Very Just Steward.

The New Haven Register tonight prints
a remarkable story of financial integrity on
the part of q Southern capitalist which
stands without a parallel in the COM
mercial history of the country. The
names of the principals are withheld, but
the eminent responsibility of the counsel
in the case, ex-Judge Luzon B. Morris,
of New Haven, is a sufficient guarantee
of its truthfulness. The Register says
that at the beginning of the civil war q
wealthy Southern grocer, who had
recently taken his young bookkeeper into
partnership, fearing that his property
would be confiscated, decided to 60
North. He told the bookkeeper to use
the property, valued at about $40O, 900,
as he thought best, and that he would
rely upon the bookkeeper's honor for a
settlement at some future time. The
merchant then came North and settled in
New Haven. Six years ago, wondering
what had become of his estate in the
South, the merchant placed the matter in
the hands of Judge Morris, with instruc-
tons to investigate and collect II there
was anything to collect.
After some correspondence with the
bookkeeper at the South the latter for
warded an acknowledgement of the claim
and an inventory showing his indebted
ness to his former employer to be
$G4s, 600, and expressed his desire TO
return the property, but requested time
to perfect his arrangements. He began
remittirg several years ago and has for
warded the last payment, including
interest, thus wiping out debt of honor.
Judge Morris declines to give the details
further than that his client is gentleman
listed as q millionaire and that the
Southern gentleman is now a wealthy
banker.