St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1887-09-25


HM sM quite liable to be pref
IEC>+Tvel ndiced in her opin-
WIS ~&E ions. 1t would be
E/ difficult for the woman
who had been happily
mated III her teens" to declare against
early marriages. and it would be, impOS-
sible for the woman who found her
hearts ideal by waiting until she was
thirty to believe there could have been
wisdom in an earlier selection. Almost
as many views could be taken of this
subject as there are dispositions and sit
nations i'll life. No arbitrary rule can
be laid down for all women to follow in
such a matter. We see daily girls of
seventeen who seem as mature in mind
and body as others who are many years
older. Human beings are as varied in
their types as plants and vegetables, and
require as much variety of treatment i'll
their care.
But in looking over the list of eXcep-
tiOnally happy and unhappy women
whom | have known in my somewhat
extensive acquaintance, l must confess
the weight of arguments is not III favor
of early unions. Added to my personal
friends, | am in constant receipt of let
tiers from strangers who acquaint me
with their sorrows and ask me for SYM
pathy and advice. Within very short
period of time three women have writ
ten to me on this identical Subject-de-
ploring early and indiscreet marriages
as the root of all their SORROWS.
AMERICAN VS.. FOREIGN CUSTOMS.
In foreign countries, where single
women are restricted in their privileges
and carefully guarded from contact with
the world, marriage is necessity: it is
only as wife that a woman obtains any
liberty frpp6Onl of action NV arpu-
ments, therefore. are only applicable to
our American girls. who are, withal, of
more account in the progress of civillZa-
ton and the advance of thought than all
the princeSseS of all the kingdoms in
the world. Every American girl is
reared to consider herself a young prin-
cess; but. unlike her foreign sisters, she
is not taught to bow to any superior.
1t is sad commentary on American
society and American manners that so
many bright and otherwise charming
young girls arelallowed to tyranniZe
over their fathers and mothers, and that
the parents seem to feel q sort of servile
pride in being eclipSed by their own off
spring. | know an almost innumerable
number of young girls still under TWEEN
ty who monopoliZe the conversation, re-
prove their parents publicly for any
careless or old-faShioned form of speech,
and whose opinions are law and gospel
in the households; while the parents
stand humbly in the background, gaz-
ing, half in awe and half in wondering
admiration, upon the brilliancy of their
own progeny. This thoroughly Ameri-
can system of educating young girls
does not cOnduce to their early wisdom
or discretion. 1t permits them to gain
a sort of premature chaotic idea of the
surface things of life far beyond their
years and gives them an exaggerated i'm
preston Of their own Importance. 1t
requires time and experience to enable
them to rightly estimate their own worth
OF understand their own needs.
EMOTIONAL DEVELOPMENT.
American girls as a rule develop early,
In consequence of this lack of careful
training, an intensity of crude emotion
and a precociouS intellect, which grasps
knowledge quickly, but of necessity di-
geSts it slowly. There is time in the
life of almost every girl when the
Duchess novels satisfy her mental
cravings, and when the curl of a mus
tache or the mellow tones of tenor
voice constitute her ideal of manhood.
Time natures her taste i'll literature and
experience ripens her judgment of hui
mainly. She outgrOws the Duchess"
and appreciates George Eliot; and she
laughs at the silly effigy whom she had
invested with romantic halo, and adj
mires in its place men of brain, princi-
pie and heart. The girl who marries
during this transition period is almost
sure of ultimate unhappineSs.
Lying on my desk to-day is letter
from wretched woman who finds re-
lief in telling me her story. II married
at sixteen, 'she says, land at twenty-five
/ awOke to find myself woman united
to man who had not one taste or SYM
pathy in common with me. We live
together under the same roof, and we
are too well bred to quarrel, hut oh! the
CHASTITY loneliness of it all! Tell me
what can do-how l can employ my
time to stop thinking"
is THIS AMERICAN?
Not very long ago L was in the pres
ence of charming couple, now past
thirty. They had married when the
wife was but sixteen. The husband
adOred her, and | had always looked
upon them as an illustration of the hap
piness possible to perfectly matched
youth and maid who had journeyed to-
wards the noon of life together. The
wife was that type of American woman
so frequently met with who develops
from pretty girl into superbly
handsome woman, "a thousand times more
attractive at thirty-three than she was
at eighteen. America, and America
only. is prolific in the production of such
women. Each year but lends an added
charm, and time but SOftens and per-
fectS the crude tintS and outlines of
youth. Exulting in her beauty and
proud of her attractions, this worshiped
wife was indiscreet in speech and ac-
ton during moment of exuberant en-
joyment.' Her husband gently reprOved
her. She turned upon him with the
fury of young lioness.
at does very well for you to talk pru-
dence" she cried. "But / will enjoy
myself will be admired! never had
any youth. My girlhood was passed in
was old when l should have been young.
Every dog has his day, and every wom-
an is entitled to hers. Mine has come
and mean to make the most of it,
have in mind another wife-a woman
of wonderful tact, patience and courage
who has made an Eden out of what
her friends believed would prove most
disastrous marriage. She became wife
at twenty-eight, yet until several years
past her teens she was the despair of
parents, teachers and friends, so cratic
and unreliable seemed her character.
A GOOD EXAMPLE.
A happy woman, whose husband con-
siders her model being, related to me
an incident connected with her early
married life which has some bearing on
this subject. She had married at thirty
man about her own age, with whom
she was Economically and passionately
in love.
''The first evening after we settled
down from our honeymoon trip she
said, s'when my husband told me he was
going down to the club for an hour or