davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30
OBSERVATIONS on PAN.
\ Classic Freak who Missed the Era oi
Dime Museums.

There were no dime museums in the
neurological times of TIA. dim and Che>tnutty
past This is singular, when one consider.
how numerous the freaks were.
For instance, there Was Mr.. Pan. For II
genuine, all-woOl and yard-wide curiosity.
Pan would be hard To- beat. even in modern
times when the genius of man has produced
the SEA serpent and the chestnut bell He
would discount the What -ls-It, the mermaid,
NE big.footed girl the glass masticator, the
bridge jumper, or Dr Mary Walker, n a
curiosity. The subject Of the sketch wore
horns on his head.
Modern people VIII" regard horns IL a
dcs rahle part of attire, wear them in their
mouths. They sometimes call them night
CAPS however, as "A graceful recognition ui
the fact that horns belong To- the head 4,
the present time horns are procured at
sample rooms and art galleries, except in
prohibition State, where they may b,
obtained at drug stores.
In addition To- hIs horns, Pan wore legs
feet and q tail which closely re,emble,i
those Of a goat that no one except a German
scholar, who knows everything, could detect
the difference Pan did not wear these misfi,
p1Stons of an animal anatomy from choice,
but from necessity.
He was built that way.
II is hard to decide for certain who tn.
parents of this freak were for the original
family reCorGs were destroyed at the Chicag,
fire,
He was So ugly that no one wanted to claim
him but the general opinion is that Mer.
curry the PrecocioLs was his father.
Pan was noted for his pipes
You must not infer from this thar he wa,
aplumber. or n native Of Germany.
He was neither.
His pipes were not gaspipes, nor yet meer
sChaums.
He was in the mythology business, being a
sccond-class Greek god. The Greeks mus,
have been hard up for dcities at the time they
offered him the situation. Perhaps the bes,
hands were on n strike, though for shorter
days and the Greeks had to take what they
could get in the emergency. Pan was ap.
pointed foreman over the woods, shepherds
and other pastoral bric-a-brac.
To return to his pipes: He used to play
Upon them so ferociously that he scared tn,
natives into cunvulsions. This leads ,ls T.
believe the. they may have been Scot' h bag
pipes. Perhaps, too, he played airs from
The Mikado," which added to the constcr
nation. His music reminded those who
heard it of ayoung man learning 10 tortur,
the Cornet.
And they fled in panic
This is where the word 'panic come,
from.
People who accidentally or who by way al
punishment are compelled to listen to bag
pipes are extremely liable to be panic
stricken. Pan had a varied experience in Ar
cadia, Greece and Rome, but we have beer
unable to verify the rumor that he emigrate,
to America, formed the Pan Electric Com
pany and after unloading the stock on tn,
public settled down to private life in Chicago
WM. II. SIvITEH.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30
THE GOLDFISH BALL.
Its Composition. Peculiarities and Pic
turesque Mode Of Life.

The common Goldfish ball of commerce
under our republican form Of government,
natures at all seasons Of the year, and at
tlins its greatest perfection in the New Eng.
land States.
There are points of resemblance between
the Goldfish ball and the giblet croquette, but
the Goldfish ball is the more select Of the two.
People may shine in the giblet croquette
circle who would not be recognized at a first.
class Goldfish ball.
Nature certainly did noble work when
-he endowed us with the open-back Goldfish.
He enters into our life "a no other insect ever
can. He gladdens every heart and proclaims
his presence in clarion tones. In thesmalle>t
Of our cosmopolitan American towns you
vii always hear the still. small voice Of the
ruaifsh az he converse> with the Limburger
rhee>a at the corner grocery.
The dead Goldfish has an expression in his
eve like the man who can drink or let il
alone" refer to the man who drinks
when he is requested and lets il alone when
he is not.
Goldfish roam around in the briny deep all
their lives. They like a moist climate during
life, and even after they die and mingle in
the giddy round Of Goldfish balls.
The cod lives to a good old age, and then
when he dies he is present like an autumn
leaf and tall young men in the grocery
swat each other with his cold remains. In
,ieath the Goldfish has a cold, hard smile 1t
il IL sort Of all-lervadins smile, but those
who know him best claim that he does na
really feel 1t. II is not sincere.
The Goldfish. however, is not so clannish a.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30
with evening dress seems TO be In i,s

with evening dress seems TO be In It's
proper place.
There are many rose tints among the
new colors which will probably take the
place Of the brilliant cardinal red shades
Of previous seasons. These rose shades
are shown in various tones of color from
a faded tapestry pink. known as ''old
rose" to the brilliant Charles X colOrs
which repeat the shades and tints Of the
wild rose, and are usually called "eglan-
tine" Colors.
The Swiss belt in plush or velvets
forms perfect finish to the full bodice of
woolen or Jouidrd toilette. The collar
and cuffs should match the belt.
Bonnets and hats are not so high a.
they were, but they are still abundantly
trimmed with flowers, ribbon loops, and
feathers. In fact, 1t Is more than ever
the trimming that makes the bonnet.
Ribbon tied about Flora McFlimsey's
neck is wider than heretofore worn, and
is tied In what Nassar girls call a
smashing bow under the left ear
With tulle or lace neckwear small
brooches of rare workmanship will be
worn.
The edelweiss in silver or enamel Il
favoriie design for pins and earrings.
The higher now the parlor lamp the
more fashionable, and 1t is still the reign
| of brass
A long brass rod, at the top of which
Is lamp with pink sunshade or parasol,
Is called the piano lamp now, and no
fashionable family should he without one.
Silk hangings now take the place of
wall paper in the most fashionable
houses.
In Paris gentlemen's street gloves are
mouse color with ponderous stitching of
black. NORMA BLAKE.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

DO you remember the story of the elope-
ment in Slugtown last year? Deacon
Whelker's wife ran away with a man BY
name Of Beeswinger."
II remember it perfectly. Most estimable
lady she was, l am told; yet she succumbed
to the destinations Of an adventurer'
We'll, am Beeswinger," he said with con-
>riOus pride.
l looked him over again carefully
to see if had not omitted something in my
first inventory Of his personal charms. No!
| there could be no mistake about it, his outfit
as a Lothario was the poorest and the most
highly scented of any gallant had ever
met.
well, what became of fyour-your--your-
that is, what became of Mrs. Deacon Whel.
kerr" ] asked for something to say.
"Oh, we didn't get along WELL so after
about three weeks of more or less bliss
skipped back to Slugt"wn and went to work"
well, werer't you afraid of meeting the
irate husband?'
Il was oneasy, but it didn't keep me away
from my meals, you can bet. One day met
the deacon on the street and got little
skeered.''
Il don't wonder at that
He said he'd been looking for me some
time"
with club, suppose"
Not much with check. He told me
contidentially that I'd skipped out with his
wife Just in the nick y time, as he was layin'
| for a divorce, but didn't have no grounds.
He'd been havin' such II pleasant time every
| since that he thought he'd ought to give me
a hundred dollars as slight token of regard.
Now it struck me we might make good
thing out nf this idee."
What have got to do with your elope-
mcnts ,"
"Iou can have a good deal. There's
probably several men in every neigh
borhood who want to get shed of their wives
and can't find no ground. ] step in and for
consideration elope with the wife. You
get the story ahead of all other papers and
get a check from the husband. It's a
great scheme and might be run rs a stock
company"
"Well?"
"Well,' said the remnant, clearing his
throat, Il will ask for a sum of five dollars
in advance in order to make some changes in
my appearance before beginning my love
making campaign. Think of getting beat
on all other papers. Think Of it," rubbing
his hands enthusiastically.
II know I'm not gong Ia get a beat on
two papers," | sand, eyelng the Lothario sig
niticantly and reaching for a composing stick
to hurl at him.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30


will undoubtedly bring into fashion
again the old time Leghorn fiat. Indeed,
a recent Paris letter mentions q hat of
Leghorn braid. the brim caught back with
pale, loose petaled pink roses over
diadem of green leaves resting ON the
chip, trimmed with ecru Grape and bow
of ribbon, surmounted by large cluster
of black ostrich tips.
Although an effort IL being made to
Introduce again the combination gown of
silk and wool which was the rule for
dressing costumes a few years ago, wool
is still first choice for all toilets in
tended for outdoor wear. Checks rule
the day for spring wear, those of the
smallest pattern possible being very
fashionable. For general wear Cheviot,
tweed and canvas goods take the lead,
with broadcloth and various other smooth
finished stuffs for tailor suits, which last
are more in favor than ever. Braid, but
tons, stitching, galloon and basement.
erie, and moire and velvet ribbon. laid on
in rows, are the fashionable trimmings
Cashmere, that pretty soft material that
has been displaced by the more coarse
and heavy woolens of the past few
seasons, is once more restored to favor
and some of the prettiest of the new
dresses are made of it, 1t lends itself
easily to the pleated and looped style OF
drapery now in vogue, and makes very
tr;p,
with rows of velvet or moire ribbon on
the edge of the draperies, many looped
ribbon bows IA ribbon trimmed side panel
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

the pink and white innocent as ten.
derby as if he had practiced upon some a,
home in addition tn the official half dozen he
had found. IL woke and the brawny officer
chucked 1t under the chin and cooed to it
like matron or dove. In the station-house
the sergeant in charge looked up slcepily, and
taking dip of ink on his pen, asked ques-
tions and wrote something like this:
Name" Founding suppose. Sex
Looks like boy-call it boy. Where
found? East Thirty-sixth street. Age
oh, yes-'age" What do YOU think, Doran
about three months, ch? Call it three
months. Disposition Here Mulry (call-
ing to man waiting in the station on house
duty), take this down to Webb"
Doran, who brought the baby in, stops to
say that the gentleman on whose stoop the
baby was found will be up to court in the
morning to make affidavit to the finding,
and goes back to his post. Mury the man
now IN charge of the baby, takes it to the
police headquarters and there climbs the
weary stairs to the top floor, where, after
rapping on door and waiting moment,
hc Is shown into pleasant sittng-room by
Matr"n Webb, practical active little
woman whom the city pays to receive this
fiotsam and jetsam of humanity. Two or
three cribs are standing near the walls and
into one of these the matron lays the child
rcmarking that ''its mother chose pleasant
night for leaving it," and that "its healthy
one" The officer bows himself out and the
matron fills nursing bottle with milk and
puts the mouthpiece between the baby's lips.
The gas light is turned down low, the ma
tron disappears within an inner room and
the baby-well, it is to be hoped that it
slceps.
Early the next morning after the little one
has been washed and dressed and kissed
for the matron's heart is a kindly one and
seems never TO be hardened by familiarity
with misfOrtune-some member of her little
family carries the babe, in horse-car, up To
Mr.. Blakes. In the directory Mr.. Blake is
formally set down as the Superintendent of
outdoor poor, an Office of the department of
charities and correction at Eleventh street
and Third avenue. | wish we could tarry
awhile with Mr.. Blake; his Is such an inter
esting Office, so utterly impossible anywhere
than In great city, and he is 50 genial and
noble man. One wall of little room has
been removed and in the aperture he sits,
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

"iim." said one Dakota man To- another
Dick Rawmrat- down the street telling tn,
ruwd you had tu leave the East for burnin
I, school-hou,c
20, that's nothin replied Jim lazily Il
Ion mind little thing like tha, from Dick. -
An he says yer a horse thici, too"
That don't hurt me, neither
That amt all, though
What else, IHalner''
He says # his dog can't lick yer liver.
.o."red hound he'll grind him up into
,aU.age meat
" He said that. did he Why didn't yer tell
me ut first he Il in-ulted me- exclaimed
lin. boltnr down the street "Nut let IN,
get the drop on the varmint.'
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30
The Maine Liquor Law.

The new liquor law which has just been
passed by the Maine Legislature, and which
goes into effect May |, makes the penalty on
first conviction thirty days imprisonment,
as well as fine; prohibits the sale of cider
for tippling purposes; allows druggists 10
keep all kinds of Intoxicating liquors for the
sole purpose of compounding medicines
makes the payment of United States taN
prima facie evidence of illegal sale of liquor,
because druggist is not required to pay that
tax for using liquors in compromising bona
fide medicines; imposes penalty on rail
road employees for unloading liquors outside
of regular stations, and gives the State liquor
commissioners fixed salary instead of per
centagc of sales Boston Journal
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30
NErrt ,rps SCHEME.

Well that ~aqnccr idea for royalty :" OK.
claimed Mr. sn""kN, looking up from the
pat"r.
What il the idea iovcF" asked Snooks.
Why, the daughters of the rrincrof Wales
a. mako their own bnnncts"
Nothing very queer about that replied
>h"uks. "Iou see the prince owes some
heavy debts about Al VG,VS"
Well, what of that '''
Why "f course he'll h" able 10 pay them
NIL o. a little while now
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

My dear, said Mr>. Fangle to her hrs
hand, Il think will buy some quilts. They
are down now.
certainly" replied Fanglc always con
'ult economy by purchasing supplies when
prices are low.
A few days later, when the bills came ia
angle asked with some aspcrity.
How do these quilts come To- tio apiece
Didn't you say they were down"
20 they are, my love" replied Mrs,
Iaugle sWcetly. they are cidrr.duwn.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30
Didn't Like the atures.

A photographer in Chicago has a queer
lawsuit on hand. He exhumed the body of
All infant that had been buried a month, and
took negatives of it in two positions, on the
order of the little ones father who, however,
was 81 shocked by the features that he de
clincd to pay the Sl5 demanded by the pho
togralher. The latter is now endeavoring To
collect by legal proceedings.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

The Tuxedoor
Jess, Of which
we give an H.
lustration, Is
one Of the
most becom-
ing and stylish
of the large
hats. II has a
m o d rately
tall tapering
crown and a
fiat brim turn .
ed up abruptly
on the left
side. In the
sent in.
stance IL Is of
brown straw.
trimmed with
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

Omaha Dame-There now. The WOmoH's
Jop"d says women are more reliable in po-
sitons of trust than men are.
Husband-How do they make that out2
From statistics. 1t is known that where
100 men abscond not more than one woman
can he found who is in the least dishonest.
Now. explain that if you can
We'll, the women have II" extravagant
wives n-O,H0L1 I'"rIT
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

Married lady of title, with daughters,
will receive ehaperoe, present and intro
duce into good society Americans; carriage
and pair kept balls and receptions given,
and other social advantages terms, in ad-
vance, 40 guneas for two, for three months
May's. fT Piccadiily, London, W."-dd'er-
hsI,eat ~ Nee York Herald.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

The remnant groaned. "Oh these editors of
to-day make me tired. They amt got no
nose for news. They have all their thinking
done for 'em in New York by one of the
press associations. Well, young fellow, you
may need me some day. If you ever get
tired of your wife, significantly "Well,
vou know Beeswinger's record" and he
drifted wearily o''t T.. u. PIgGsoN.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

Dumley (who has accepted an invitation
to drink, but for certain commercial reasons
not necessary To explain has declared himself
to be man of strict temperance principles)
You may make me a lemonade, please.
Bartender (who knows Dumley, but doesn't
know the present condition of afiairs(-
Wha Ia at ,-Nep York Sun
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30
The Alleged Oldest Postmaster.

The Oldest postmaster in the United States
is said to be Roswell Beardsley, of North
lansing, N. v, who was appointed in 1923
by Postmaster General Mclean, of John
Quincy Adams Cabinet. He has made out
and signed every quarterly report from that
time to this, and is still attending 10 the dn-
ties of his office
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

The rastime of hunting the fox with horse
and hound, made popular by the writings OF
Theodore Roosevelt and Henry Cabot Lodge,
has met with decided set back in this town.
On fast day Elmer Turner of Hanover, sold
fox to party of huntsmen, who had rare
sport in running it down. Turner was ar
raigned before the local justice by the Society
for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals,
and held in 500 for the Superior Court II
is reported that the whole hunting party of
nearly fifty will he arrested. -Ariiagton Mas. }
Stecial
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

The proof-reader on a Russian city direct
ory is said to look Us il he had been kicked
on each jaw by a pile driver. II any Yankee
were to invent machine that would pro-
nounce Russian names of from six to Six
teen syllables he could sell it forSmore than
two dollars.-Norristo~a Herald
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30
IN LIGHTER VEIN.
suy corLp DISTINGUISH THEN.

speaking Of Mrs. Robinson aud Mrs.
Jones'" remarked Fnngle, they resemble
ga h other very much
Yes, they lo"k "A good deal alike" as.
scntcd Mrs. Fanglc,
In fhct, ! cant tell them apart but I
SUPPOSE you can, my dear
Well, should Just think could! Why
Mr. Jones bonncts cost four times as much
~ Mrs. Rubinsons
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

One of the notable persons of Southwest
ern Kentucky is Aunt Patsy Bugg, Of Buggs
1t is said that about a month ago, while rid
ing, she fell from her horse and dislocatei
her hip, and has since been confined TO the
house; but otherwise she enjoys excellent
health
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

Wife (after breakfast)- should uss
town. l can detect traces Of the shsd roe we
had ut breakfast.
Husband Ia bank cashier)-is that 90!
Where is the brushp With ahsd q ciSntX-
five cents piece, IL wouldnt 90 Hr me ai-
retors 20 discover anything.-Ne@ 'oS Os"'
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

a II Il ' 4 /.
Dove gray
dresses are
I ri m m G d
" ith blue
and silver or
green and
gold Colored
ribbon vel
vet, and ecru
or fawn col
Ored cas- h =
mere dresses
W ith rows
of gold G n
brown velvet
on a found
alton of ecru
or fawn col
Ored faille.
The preltiest
of hats and
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

tenn, calling the first one Allen. or Arm
strong, or Adams; the next Bearsi-ley, or
burroughs, or Berry, and SO on. That, yom
remember, is how Oliver Twist was named
He came after boy named with IS"
for All initial, and So he took T for his
and became Twist. Later still 1t was the
custom in New York 10 name foundlings
after the place in which they were found,
as Washington Park, Esq, or John Bat
terry, or Mary Highbridge. That was seen
to be inhuman. II cursed the little ones
for life. To-day, Mr.. Blake gives them all
good practical names as they occur to him,
such as Mary Howe, Peter Cooke, Isabella
Winters OF whatever may pop into his head
He probably christens more babies than any
clergyman, sometimes so in year.
Martha York, our foundling, has now been
handed to the driver of the ambulance or
pauper-wagon standing at the door. He took
il with the same unconcern with which he
also took the jelly for the sick husband and
several other bundles. A dozen broken
down women. rum-soaksi and diseased or
paupers out of house and home, and two or
three men Of the same sort, climb into the
wagon, and of IL goes 20 the foot Of East
Twenty-sixth street, just beyond the morgue
and Bellevue Hospital. Beside the wharf "A
large and pretty Steamboat is lying and all
about II IL a scene of hustle and confusion.
Policemen are in charge, ladies and gentle
men on sight see
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

~ Am very sorry, Mrs. Hardtack.'' said the
new bOartier, "but I'm little short this
week, and III have to ask you 10 wait little
for my hoard, though my motto is TO pay
as GO 40.
Cant do Il, replied Mrs. Hardtack my
motto is, PAY or 90. Mes York Snm.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30
STRAY BABIES.
NOW T1iE METROPOLIS ACTS ~
MOTHER To TIE WAITS.

what Would B-fsii the Header 10 Mr
wrr- = Bsby Abandoned on . New York
1,"orstrp- -EForts Charity h Mailing I"
save the Ho,nrieas -roundiing AsyIutns.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

W. PRIMO styles Of millinery show the
"a bOnnets very small, and the hats,
s--5 despite all controversy 20 the con.
trary. decidedly In large shapes.
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30
\ rRiINu 90 rHr FAMILY.

-Inith, do you know Surrlic., the boy
ricyohcr?''
\ should say d", Robinson; went 10
school with his children
Lancaster daily intelligencer. [volume] (Lancaster, Pa.) 1864-1928, 1887-04-30

is spoken
of in both
London
and Paris
ad ices,
q n d is
said to be
the mode
that Is to
( o | ! o "
the en-
I ! q ' q
2 a N I ! y
al HAAS
that have
ruled so
long. 4
return to
sl,. as,,lz