The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-01-27
The Successor to the Stage Driver.

The stage-driver is with the past. He
is deplored by those who, as boys,
hung on the back of the stage as il
Numbered along, the monarch of the
road. He is wept over in song and sto
ry by those whom he was wont to ill
to the upper teeth with wild and
weird stories, and his exit from life is de-
plored by those who hung upon his phi
losophy. For he had philosophy, had
tins four-horse child of nature. lie
had communed with nature and mixed
with travelling kickers till he could not
have prevented himself from being
somewhat of philosopher, unless he
had stopped the pors of his skin to pre-
vent philosophy from. getting into him.
from absorpt on. But just nature has
left substitute for the stage-driyer,
and the substitute is the horse car-dri-
yer. He does not go whistling along
the road with the "Yo-ho" Of Dickens,
while the dogs bark and the children
on the sidewalks going to school clap
their hands in ecstacy of JOY.
He does not wind horn and split
the air with the cracker of his whip.
as he touches up the front of horse. for
he has no horse. He is not surrounded
when his journeys end is reached by
admring crowds, and he does not
swagger the worshipped Of all the
world. But he is here He drives Il
mule, with which he is on intimate
terms He sometimes urges the mule
into trot and sometimes a gallon on
the toughest part of the road He
punches him with the car broom To-
accelerate his flight ut times, but usual
ly he whacks him with the remnants of
what was formerly blacksnake whip.
He, in fact. is q true illustration of the
survival of the fittest, the slow plod-
ding, unsatisfactory but get-there-all-
the-same phoenix which has sprung
from the fiery stage-driver. But be-
philosophy. He studies at all times
He looks ut passenger and studies his
disposition by seeing how many times
he will ring to be let off before getting
mad. He ascertains the exact amount
of amiability in female with n bundle
by starting the mule just rs she has
turned from putting the fare in the
box. He shows TO n nicely how tough
n child il and how well il is prepared
physically to battle with life. by sudden
ly putting on the brakes just as its ma
has told it to get change from the
driver.
He stops at the switch just rs every
body's supper is ready and there dis
cusses the financial condition of the
road. swaps change with his partner.
mayhap, passes n word or two on the
crisis in European affairs. and then
glides away with a elaboration that
makes the warm bread at home mouldy
with age before il is eaten. He is not
quarrelsome. but he generally manages
to run the car. He is not impcrtinent.
but woe to him or her who says any
thing witty at his expense. IF hadn't
rlng / suppose you would have driven
me past where / wanted to get of, "
said she; and he replied: That !
would. IL was a mind reader. mad
am, / wouldn't be street-car driver.
Ii is probable that any one who talks
to him in this way will hereafter give
him notice of where he should stop or
ring the bell. The car-driver is admir-
able, and by himself he is interesting.
but in conjunction with a bad track and
a bad mule, he becomes in time an OBJ
ject of adherence to all who live along
his line. Let us forgive him his faults.
But these are not his faults.-GalUestoH
Daily NesCs.