The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1887-09-09
VARIETIES,

And how did you like America, COUNT"
"Ah re longer | stay away, re better like
it."
Nine hundred women in Iowa own and
manage farms. This is in addition to the
much larger number that own and manage
farmers.
-"Gerty, did show you this engagement
ring OF emeralds and diamonds that Charley
Brown gave !" "Ob, I've seen it before!"
seen 1t before :" Yes, l was engaged to
him the first part of July"
1t is said that snake will wiggle and
show signs of vitality long time without
any head. The dude will do the same thing
without any brains.
Hi! Brudder Stephens, what you doin'
down in desc parts? fought you was to
work over at Miss Bleedenson's?" $50 I
was, Brudder Manuel so l was; but my
health didn't agree with me and was 'bleeg-
ed to quit"
Young man Ito messenger boy)-"What
did the young lady say when you gave her
the tiowers?" Messenger boy-"She asked the
young Teller who was sitlin' on the porch
with her if he didn't want some for a button
hole bouquet"
Sam Johnsing an Austin colored man,
has mule that balks. After Sam had bella.
bored the mule for an hour the animal trot-
ted off all right. Oar" said Sam confiden-
TALLY to the mule, "dar yer see. Eff yer
would only do what's right we mout lib ter.
geder jes' like two brudders."
Compassionate Clara isn't 1t sad
Poor Mr.. Littlewit has gone out his mind"
Satirical Sallie-"1 wonder he stayed there
as long as he has. Awfuly cramped quar-.
tiers, you know"
There was a little girl
And she had little curl
which hung in the middle of her forehead
When the weather was cool
1t crimped according to rule
When the weather was hot 1t looked horrid.
Have you spoken to my daughter vet ?"
asked the old man. mo, sir; wanted your
consent first" well, advise you to give
up the idea. don't believe she would mar
ry you, and if she did, neither of you would
be happy" why do you think so, sir"
Because you part your hair in the middle
and she parts hers on the side"
"A Kentuckian with large jug made bar
gain with counlryman to take him four miles
over the hill. How much'll you charger"
"Oh, couple of swigs of the stuff in that
Jug'll make it about square, reckon" AT
ter the journey had been made and the coun-
tryman had taken swig, he said: stranger,
I'm peaceable man, but, if you don't want
to be chuck full of lead to night you'd better
hnd another way to carry your molasses."
"A Washington man tells off quarrel be.
tween two colored boys. The larger boy,
with great volubility, was applying every sort
of abusive cpithet to the smaller boy. The
smaller boy, leaning against fence and re-
garding the speaker with sullen scowl
waited for halt 1t came at last as you
done ?" Eyes, is done" Then slowly and
cody, the smaller boy said "All dem dipgs
you say is, you is DEM"
Il notice" said a clergyman's wife to her
husband, that it is no longer fashionable for
the minister to kiss the bride at the wedding
ceremony" YES" sadly responded the
young man, many of the pleasant features
with the wedding ceremony have
been discarded, and whats that ?" de-
manded the wife, ominously. n meant
mean" he stammered, that the senseless GUS
tom of kissing the bride should have been
abolished long ago."