Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-03-26

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Now, Mr.. Bradley, before entering on
this conversation with you, spent some
| time in making thorough search of your
house, and as ] was on the lookout for hid
| ing places, l ran my hands into several
pairs of shoes, but, curiously enough, did
not find a single pair of boots"
"Ahi I see the inference. But can
not find them myself half the time You
are married man and can understand
that"
What l understand is that you avoid
the point az issue. The time is passing.
and here we are, no nearer a settlement.
Had you not better acknowledge the boots
to save timer
Never sir. ] tell you brought them
in my bootlegs."
Well, well. wen ust compromise this.
and get on faster. 1t is 1890 already Sup
pose we say that by the necessity of the
case l am convinced the money is here in
| the house. and that you by the necessities
| of the case are compelled to believe that it
| is in the city. But, TO save valuable time
| you agree to waive the point of dispute ON
my assurance that if you will listen further
| You may see reason to modify your belief,
and l agree not to ask you more questions
about your boots, or to draw differences
from the answers you have already given
Il "
l accept it, though must say"
For the love Of brevity make no more
exceptions; time is fitting too fast. Can
you not allow me to say what l have to
say, and you remain quiet and then you
say what you have to say, and ] remain
quiet ?"
Very easily. It was you that interrupt
ed me, you remember. But let that pass
! am listening with hundred ears"
"Oh, very well, then. Here we are
But had better begin at the first Your
house, as | have intimated, has been pretty
thoroughly searched. | entered it, Mr..
Bradley, soon after you left it, and have
been at work ever since; and l was not
afraid Of Mrs, Bradley's returning, because
the haoits of your family have been sub.
ject of quite close study to me for some
months, and ! knew that when Mrs. Brad
ley went in town she always spent the day
there. knew also that the children were
away in the country, and that your wife
was herself keeping house during their alb
sence. You perceive that am posted"
Very much So"
Yes. 1t is good part CT year since
began watching your monthly trips to
the factory. Some slip was sure to come, |
for that is human nature. At last human
nature repaid my trust, and caught you
mapping"
" How guilty you make me feel sup
pose that you deem yourself an instrument
appointed by the angelic powers to find out
wicked cashiers?n
Not as bad as that. l will call myelf
simply burglar, and leave the angelic
powers to the modern business man. Well, |
as l was saying, | searched your house
pretty thoroughly. l could find no money
and was about to renounce my task, when, |
my eye resting on this telephone, the con-
ception of consulting you about the matter
flashed through my mind. 1t seemed
ventureSome experiment, but I rung up
the central Office, got connected with you,
and here We are talking the matter over
quietly. l shall soon be through now.
VIII you continue listeningY
Z" I am all attention"
GOOD. l knew you were a man of
quick wits, and that probably you would
refuse to admit that the money is here, so I |
made few preparatory arrangements be-
fore calling you at the telephone In fact,
foresaw I should have to compel you in
some way to reveal the hiding place Of that
money; and this, Mr.. Bradley, is the disa-
greeable part of my task. | have never
burned house down before, but nv mind
is made up to burn yours down now unless
you reveal to me right away where that
money is hidden. Yes, sir. | have Just
brought up several armfuls of kindling
wood from the cellar, and have piled it in
the hallway and wet it with a can of kero-
sene. so that it can all be touched off in
minute. Now, without multiplying more
words
" Without multiplying words, Smith, |
defy you. Light the house if you want to- |
You have got hold of the wrong man this |
time-yes, indeed"
Er21lectioxe How x-o7J Of or, !
clusion Can't you let me finish before |
you explode? Perhaps I'm not as dreadful |
as you think.
Finish yes, if you ever will. Are |
you aware that you have been half an hour |
coming to the point?"
A." A half hour of interruptions"
Well, well Henceforth l am silent |
Let US by all means get through with this |
business. You have thoroughly searched |
my house and you have piled up several |
armfuls of kindling wood in the hall, with |
kerosene on it, ready to touch off in min |
ute; and here we are, as You say, quietly |
talking the matter over. What comes
next?"
What comes next is an alternative |
The burning of your house, Mr.. Bradley, |
seems quite needless, as well as disadVan-
tangeous to US both. Here is the case !:
On the one hand, if you refuse to give up
the money and compel me to burn the
house, you'll lose both the house and mon
ey. On the other hand if you sensibly
tell me where the greenbacks are hidden,
you will lose the money, it is true, but you
will save the house. In either case, the
money is lost; you cannot save your EN-
ployer's funds, whatever you do, and you
have simply to put that question aside.
Well, put it aside. 1t now only remains
for you to decide whether you will save
your house or lose it, and offer you that
alternative. Does it appear very difficult
question to decide upon?"
"Smith, you were made for logician,
| not burglar. Your statement of the case
quite resembles lawyers brief, and before
| you go any further Ishould like to ask you,
| if l may, whether your occupation has al
ways been what it is at present, for you do
not talk like an-an-"
AN outlaw? ?"
Yes, that's tin plain language. What
! is it that has brought you to the pass of
piling up kindling wood in other peoples
| houses, and threatening them with con-
| flagration after thirty minutes statement
| of alternative? ~
A sense of humor. Did the absurdity
of the world and its conventions never
strike you? l was born with an unusual
dose of that
] n. ~
| but tncfe Is Imprisonment lOr LIE, anu
such little Matters
"That strikes me as humorous too
Think of the conceit Of locking person up
for life OF course it is justifiable hard
ship, but just think of the vastness of con-
| ceit implied in one mans walking up to
another and clapping him into prison for
all his born days. Merely as vastness of
conceit it is very humorous. This is
ridiculous bubble Of world
1T is a ridiculous bubble of a world
only l fear you underestimate the disad-
vantages of laughing on the wrong side"
It seems to be safe at present. Are you
not going to answer my alternative?"
Yes-the alternative / was forgetting
it. The trouble with that alternative,
Smith, is that my mind sees another AS
you say, the burning of the house seems
entirely needless and disadyantageous to