The Hot Springs star. (Hot Spings [Hot Springs], Dakota [Dakota Territory, i.e. S.D.]) 1886-189?, 1887-09-30
DIR. MARY WALKER,
H0W She Once Fried to Prsvant I've
Gentlemen from smoklng and Failed.

LAW. &M8kAA A1A8Ak34U
nov she oaes Tried to Prsvsas I'VE
Gentlemen from Smoking ana Failed.
"Dr. Mary Walkeri Oh. yes, 1
know Mary very well. Imade her ac-
q%uaintance way down in Texas shortly
after the war;"
The speaker was Henry p. Sanger,
who leaned back In his. chair and
putfed mcditativcly at his cigar. 81
was on my way he said, ito attend
the first state fair hold In Texas ut
Houston. took tho steamer at Gal
veston-and a mighty fine steamer that
was, too. with great board decks and
reclining chairs, and commanded by
officers who cre perfect gentlemen,
for Houston, and there was a mighty
big crowd on board. There were some
distinguished people, too, including
Judge Jc.c Black, tho noted Pennsyi-
vaiiian.
''About two minutes before tho gang
plank was hauled in aud tho order
given to cast OFF, u carriage came rat
Ting down the street and stopped on
the wharf. Saclcls, bandboXes. and
sFawls began to issue from the vehicle
in endless profusion, and wcre followed
by Il mite of humanity dressed in the
half-male. half-fcmale garb which has
advertised the namc of DR.. Mary
Walker throughout the land. She flew
about on the wharf issuing pcrcmptOry
orders to the portcrs, the ships Off.
GERS, and in fact everybody within
reach of her voice. She was accom-.
panied by II tall. lank individual of un-
certain age, with oiled locks which
hung vcr his shirt collar, and a
carefully-waNed mustachc, the ends of
which were reduced to Il point fine en-
ougil to thread a needle. He conduct
ed the great Mary-or rather, Mary
conducted him,-up the g%ang-plank
with considerable ceremony, and they
disappeared from the view of the curi-
ous passengers.
'''Nhen the dinner hour arrived I
went down to the dining saloon with a
friend. We found the room income
fortably crowded, and concluded to 90
to the aftcr-acck and smoke until the
crowd had tlinncd out. Smoking was
not prohibited on the aftcr-deck, but
we found 81 couple of ladies there. and.
SO asked their permission before light
ing IL cigars. We smoked and chat
ed away there for several minutes
when the rasping voice of Mary
Walker fell upon our ears.
"Ihrow those nasty cigars away!w
1--WE smoked on, pretending not to
have heard the command, when the
voice sounded more emphatic, 4 want
you men to throw those nasty cigars
away at once. They arc otfensivc.S
my companion bowed toward the
two ladies nea by and inquired, is
III smoking offensive, ladies?
"Oh, no., no." they cN%postulatcd,
keep your cigars, gcnilcmen.'
We renewed our conversation and
calmly smoked away. The doctor
grew warm. Men, don't smoke she
exclaimed. Only brutes in the form
of mcn will dclilc their mouths with
vile tobacco. Any man with y mother,
wife, daughters, IL sweetheart, or any
body whom he respects is a disgrace to
her or them, aud to his race if he
smokes or chews tobacco"
"I'his was delivered with an attempt
at oratorical effect that was really
Imaginable.
Sir began my friend.
"Don't sir me! screamed the now
excited woman. Il am DIR. Mary
Walker, and you know it. Don't pre-
tend that you don't know my SEX
"Wcll, then, madam, l Just want to
say right here that l have Il mother.
l also have II wife and five children.
Some ot 'cm are girls. Ihavc a grand
aun and sever other aunts, and the
last time 1 counted | had tlirty-nine
female cousins. My swccthcarts are
as numerous as the stars in the hcav-
ems. and | kiss 'em every chance l get.
l have chcwed tobacco like II veteran
for forty-scven years, and | smoke
whenever l feel like it.
"Tiic doctor danced around like a
bug on ii hot griddle. AT this junctme
the ships steward appeared upon the
scene. She laid hands upon that Off
cial and demanded that those dirty
l%oafcrs' be required to throw their
cigars away.
.'But smoking is allowed OH the after.
deck, eNpostulatcd the steward.
..You are no gentleman, SO there,
now replied the great Mary.
.'Ill send the captain" said the
steward, alcvtly Withdrawing from the
doctors grasp. Perhaps he'll fiS
matters to suit YOU.
Presently the captain appeared,
He quietly listened to repetition Of
DIR. Walkers TRADE and the volunteer
explanations of about fifty passenger:
who had by this time surrounded us
and then quietly laid his hand upon
her shoulder. Il am captain of this
ship he said, 'and my word here il
las. Ii you don't go into your state
room at once Ill put you in irons, and
Mary Went.
Then everybody smoked. Men who
didn't smoke once q year lighted
cigars. and even the ladies smoked
cigarettes. l never saw DIR. Walker
but oncc after that. She was in New
Orleans and i'm the custody of q polio,
officer, who arrested her for .masquer