Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1887-08-25
Mrs. M'Dufry at a Game ofBase Ball,

q There is one lady in indianapolis
who will probably never become an
enthusiastic admirer of our national
game, says the Detroit Free Press.
The individual to who refer is Mrs.
McDuffy. had the misfortune to Oc-
cupy q seat adjoining hers during the
opening game between the Detroits and
the home club, and the following were
the remarks on the occasion referred to.
"I don't see why some woman can't
understand base ball. If there is any
thing about it that I can't see through
it will be strange" said she to her hus-
band. "Who are those big fellows over
there?"
"Why, the big FOUR of course" said
he. t....
"Oh, yes, how stupid 1 am. I sup
pose that is Jay Gould watching the
big four so close. Didn't he say one
striker He is responsible for those
dreadful strikes, isn't he? Do you think
the men will strike to-day?" r
"Great heavens, woman, are you
crazy? That is the umpire. Can't you
keep quite and watch the game?" he
growled.
"Certainly, WILL" she said. "But
where is the Detroit team? 1 haven't
seen team to-day any different from
Indianapolis horses. Do they bring
them right out on the grounds?
should think they would get frightened
in such crowd as this and kick and
cut up awfully. Do you think they
wilI?" D0 ..
at is possible" he answered resign
edly. "There are some kicking teams"
~ am so glad 1 am up here out OF
danger. What did that man do then?"
"Struck foul" ....
"Struck poor innocent fowl! The
hateful thing! 1 didn't see any fowl.
| What kind was it? What are they
cheering for?" ...
Thompson caught fly"
"Now Mr.. McDuffy don't sit there
and tell me you could see anything SO
small as fly at this distance. Besides
it's too early for flies. What do they
want to stop in game of base ball tc
catch flies for, anyway? Do tell me
what that man is acting so silly about?
"Trying to steal a base"
"The wicked thief! Where is the
base?n ...-
"Over there" explained McDuffy -
"That is the first base, that other the
second, and this one nearest, the third
care they, indeed, and that is the
soprano in the middle, / suppose?"
"Ah, yes," groaned McDdfty, "you
are getting it down fine"
"See, that naughty man has knock
ed the ball clean out of sight. Wasn't
that mean! Don't you suppose they'll
discharge him? What are they cheer
ing for now? Making q home rum
Well, I should think he would, and
stay there, too, after such an exhibi
ton of temper. What? Did you say
they were going to whitewash them
Do they just whitewash them all owe
. face and all?'
"Ah," said McDuffy, savagely
, t'you've got 1t now. That's the wa
: they fix them, and afterward calci
: mine them, and frescO them, and do
do them, and put on french roofs. HOY
) proud am of you, Mrs. McDuffy. al
you need is whitewash brush to be
full fedged member of the Lime Kill
: Club"
"How funny you are, Mr.. McDuffy
Did that man say they were giving tn
visitors goose eggs? Now what do the.
want with goose eggs in game of ball
It's getting worse and worse. [ dom
see what people go crazy over base bal
for, anyway. 1 understand the game
far as that is concerned, but there
, nothing in it. If there is anythin
smart in bringing out thousands of pee
pie to watch them catch flies, and try t
steal a base, and goose eggs, and muff'
and crack pitchers, and the Lord know
t what else-I can't see it. The mex
thing they'll kill somebody, and I don
propose to stay and see it. Hyou'
t Just see me to the carriage, Mr.. M
t Duffy, Til go home. I've had all th
base ball want.
The disgusted lady departed, to th
evident satisfaction of the HUSBAND
1 who soon returned to enjoy the remain
: der of the game in peace.