The Lebanon express. (Lebanon, Linn County, Or.) 1887-1898, 1887-04-02
"wHAT FOOLS MEN ARE"

"wHAT FOOLS MEN ARE"
Mrs. Handy stood before her dress
ing-room mirror arranging her toilet
for dinner. IL was to be only the usual
family repast bnt she seemed 10 be
taking extra pains with her appearance.
as women generally do when they have
n point To gain with their husbands
She listened rather nervously when
ever the hall bell rang. aud kept glanc-
ing uneasily AT the little ormulu clock /
on the table When the hands reached /
six, an expression of relief stole over 1
her couutenance; and then, as they |
crept slowly onward. IL deepened al
most to one of exultation.
Five minutes past six" she murmur- |
ed ..At least he won't be able TO find
fault with me now How fortunatei
Mary" to the girl who was passing the
door, chow is the dinuer?"
'All right num-" replied Mary.
..considerin' cooks new TO the place.
She's doin' her best
Mrs Handy gave the last deft touches
TO her frizzes, not so anxiously now as
when she began her toilet. drew
+ luxurious chair To the window and
+ commenced to read novel. as she
4 turned each leaf glancing impatiently
7 at the clock.
Al length she ceased to read. and an
I EXPRESSION of vexation settled upon her
countenance.
This is the second time in three
/ months that he has been late for din
ner." she murmured TO herself. Real
". il is too vexatiousl The dinner-hour
six. and he twenty minutes latei Ahl
there he is at last!
The hali-bell had rung. Mrs Handy
slipped her novel behind a cushion and
hasiened with an air of anxiety towards
the door.
What is ii. Maryp Anything hap
penedp Oh" as she caught sight of
her husband. lit is You. is it?"
Certainly" Handy replied, cheerful
ly. Whom did YOU expectP
..How should knowP' replied his
wife, tragically lit might have been
a doctor or policeman-or goodness
knows what-come to tell me that my
husband had been run over, or blown
up with dynamite. or dropped dead in
the street, or "A thousanr other horrible
J things What else could infer from
your coming home so latep Mary. bring
me nv sccntboltle."
Mary obcyed. and. seeing the storm
: brewing discreetly retired, but not far
| ther than the outside of the door.
Mr.. Handy. glamcing at his watch.
i, was Mt no loss to account for his recep-
ton.
9 'Renlly, my dear. YOU must excuse
, me- have been particularly engaged
: TODAY with very troublesome business,
Y which was not concluded till nearly six.
!, 1t was to accommodate friend. so you
: must make allowance
t .1Oh, of course" his wife interrupted.
..vou could accommodate n friend. for
l. getting that your wife WAS at home suf.
!. fering agonies on your account to say
e nothing of the dinner spelling and the
IS servants wasting their time in waiting
, am not blessed with constitution OF
e iron. and must say that five minutes
5 of such anxiety and suspense is enough
h to rob woman OF two months OF hel
V life"
}. '.I am sorry, Flora; but, you know
d this is the first time for some month
" that have not been punctual. Ant
lie surely you would not have me neglec
Is important business merely to avoid tn
slight annoyance of keeping Dime
IN waiting for few moments"
ce '-Ob, no, certainly not" replied hi
1t wife, with toss of her head. II be
q that YOU will never think of me in tn
TX least or take into consideration an
e, trouble l, Inconvenience that may su
V. fer from having my household affair
ne disarranged, and being compelled
IL take nv meals at all hours of the da
F. and night, to the ruin of my healtl
ig If had remained in my happy hon
er with dear brother Dick instead of MARI.
Is. ing"
m And here Mrs. Handy lifted her han'
lie, kerchief to her eyes,
ry Flora" said Mr.. Handy. impatien
n ly, ''how can you be so absurd. mere
sr- because happened to be few mt
he ments late for dlnnerP =
nus Il beg your pardon. Mr.. Handy.
was full fifteen minutes! A nice tin
for the head of family 10 come hon
les % dinner; and setting such an examr
nd to poor innocent little Reggie! The la
in time you were only ten minutes too lai
me If it goes on so, l have no doubt tn
in it will be AL hour next. and then a d
ate or a week, until it ends in your stayil
he away altogether from your family"
nit ..Pshaw! Flora, don't talk so TO
ppi ishly."
me Mrs. Handy fidgetpd little nervous
ap- with the lace of her dress
"Tve had an idea that Dick mig
come IL to dinner. Have you seen n
ked to-dayP"
lew YES" replied her husband CURLY
.sh- Then why didn't you bring him
dinnerP Seems 70 me you're not