Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-05-28
Saturday Smiles.

'Isn't he a splendid pitcher" exclaimed young
LADY LADY who o was witnessing her first game OF ball
pitcher, but hes way off to-day" ais he?" "Why,
ne seems to hit the bat almost every time'
School teacher, illustrating the difference be-
tween plants and animals. plants are not sus-
ceptibie OF attachment TO man, as animals are"
Small boy, at foot OF class: SHOW about burrs,
Observation-Disclosures Free Press.
A woman is not the best judge of women, but
she Is the promptest.-MacOn Telegraph.
81 won't believe anything can't explain" CIVIL
you explain why some cows have horns and others
have not?' II mean don't believe anything
can't see." "Have you ever seen your back
DOne?"-Richmond Religious Herald.
The announcement that our telephone service
Is to be improved will be gratefully received by
those who are trying to live without swearing
Chattanooga Commercial
saw, Ethel" remarked Charley to his pretty
cousin, 81 believe-aw-PH have the barbah-aw-
trim my whiskers this mawning-aw." "Do,
Charley" said his pretty cousin. "And-aw-
trimmed?" "Wel )" replied the pretty cousin, after
sufficient consideration, 81 think they would look
very sweet trimmed with pink Ribbon Harper's
Bazar.
He's GAVIN to the dawgs, paw fellaw, he has, l
assuaw you"
GOOD gracious! hadn't noticed it."
seen how tight his bweeches aw, and the cussed
colaw OF the cwavat he weaws?"-Iown Topics.
We don't want to fight,
rb But by by ling9! Canada "a what are you,
And our defaulters too? JUDGE.
The train hands on the Boston and Maine when
train is entering the Boston Depot call "BostOn:
this train goes no further" This is thoughtful
provision that prevents passengers being carried
by Boston. That 1t is not uncalled for is shown
by an incident that happened the other day when
parent good faith. 'Does this train stop at Bos-
TOM" The conductor said 1t did when they had
passengers for that station.-BOston Transcript.
A Smart Yankee Orchestra-Omaha mani was
much surprised to hear that the Boston symphony
Orchestra was a great popular success in Cincin.
natl.
Cincinnati man-success! It got the people lust
wild with enthusiasm.
"But Theodore Thomas played symphonies and
his Cincinnati seasons were FIAT failures"
Eyes, but the Boston Symphony Orchestra plays
the symphonies while the people are coming in
and after everybody gets seated and ready to listen
they start on onto things with some go in em."
Omaha World.
A man who never looks but at one side of the
street may be very interesting from picturesque
point OF view, but he is comparative failure as
street Car driver.-London (OHat) Advertiser.
1t Is unreasonable to expect q player will dr.
curve pitching without some crookedness.- Neu
Orleans Picdyune.
The new custom Of wearing gloves to dinner Is
washing the hands-PAiladeiphia NorH 1nsri
can.
Overheard in the park.
Fair EquestriennemYou seem to know great
Cubleigh (twtrling his muStache}-Well-aW
naw-nawt exactly, y know, but-a-my father
is-zOtOn Topics.
On to LOndOn-JOhn Bull-"See here Brother
Jonathan, II hear any more talk against the
British government I'll"
Brother Jonathan-"Guess you better ind on,
what sort of buckshot you're talking to befory
you make any threats Things have changed OF
this side lately"
"Oh, they have"
eyes, they have. Secretary OF the Navy Whit
ney has just bought two dogs; paid $500 piect
for them, too"
"DOgs, eh?"
''Oh, they amt any OF your little English DUES
They're great big ugly Questionable World