davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1887-06-03
M-E1NS7 :
We now have Stock amounting to fully
$4,000 of Hardware

To those who contemplate building Mechaus We would saw
hat we Will make to interest YOU NAV
this line We have Axes Hahets Footadze
i'aksmhs and Stone Mason Hammers
nove Spades Forks Grain Scoops Hoes Rkes
W Stones Botsl Sizes from inch
I GSpP s yss Rv9t Sets Wagon Bow Staples Wagon
stO Tut a@n Compass and Back Saws Spirit Levels
and Braces Augers Boring Machines Auger ali
erew Drivers Planes OF following jack Fore Rabbit
Bead Flooring Ceiling Panel Pow Moulding Drawing Knives
Spoke shyes Files Of variety Rps for Saws Planes
seis Augers Wood and
all Of variety Gate and Springs ntces
and Brass bound Rules Cp Casters and Fs
fnnss roe Plates Bull Rings Hog Rings combr
Gun Cartridges Coffee mills Bakers and Lids
the South in size twenty gallons 81 Lanterns
Hangers Crowbars Curtain Nails
Pues and Cord screwrngs Iron Steel 40
Finishing Nails Blad Tacks Pasternp Towe
Drawer pulls, Hat Coat Hooks Wood and Metal Foc.
Spring balances of good quality Chandelier Hooks Cochs Repair
INKS Apple Table and Pocket cutlery Spoons and Scissors
Gunock Doubleggers Nail sets azos and
Straps Footcapers Saes Sadons Tons Selves Meas
all sizes OF Steel and Iron every description
Ire on spoo Aonkeywenche Bksmhs longs Mahogany Knobs
sask articles
short we have the largest stock and and be
found IN the county Come and try OF yourselves - =
Very Respectfully,
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1887-06-03
He Didn,t RInn,e T6em.

He Didn't BInme Them.
The new baby had proved itself the
possessor OF extraordinary vocal pow.
ers, and had exercised them much to
Johnny's annoyance.
One day he said to his mother:
{" Malittle brother came from heaven,
didn't he 4"
: Yes, dear" 49,.
nSay, ma" :.
WHAT'S it. Johnnyps
y dontblamethe angels for bouncing
him. do your"
doing now?" - -
: se%bO: rs tendln' bosses an oper
In real estate. chr"
Yes, sab. / bought lot oil
mo months t ago in Blank addition for $500,
now7p ~ "orsu
:" Sino hundred dollars. sah."
Rather steep. Snmbo. / can pet
lots theirs any day for $500. I don't Soc
now you figure such an advance al
- Well. you SEQ. sah, PUTS tho pr,os
up slG0 dollars every month: thnt,s
What tho q cnt told me to do, sah.'
.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1887-06-03
rT,AzEwELLLoD A. F. 6
Am. No. ca
TAzEwELLC. III. y

TAzEwELL c. H, VA.
Regulaf meetings end and 4th Monday
nights Of each month. / =
"a, AL e1asons are cordially invited to at.
~ Order Of the worshipful Master.
Ahril29.1y. II. r, BiiITrAIN, Sec.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1887-06-03
THE
OLD RELIABLE.

We are no new candidates but our
election is sure, if the sstranger in
our gates will give us his custom, in
addition to that of our old friends
and customers.
All kinds of Smithing, including
the manufacture Of
HACKS, BUGGIEs & WAGONS,
Horse-shoeing and Repairs of all
kinds, will be promptly done at on,
shop near Esq. Yost's Mill. In adj
dition, we are prepared TO do all kinds
WOOD WORK
on Wagons, Buggies and Hacks. We
have in our employ two first class
horse-shoers, and guarantee all our
work to give entire satisfaction. We
are always "on n strikep@and hit
when the tiron is hotm Call at ALI
hours. LEWIS a. JONES B. Go.
Mar.25-ly.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1887-06-03
A Smart Young Man,

"college man, Eh?" said old Gram
pus.
Yes, sir" young Mr.. Slim meekly
admitted.
Thought So" growled the old man;
Graduated, reclon?'
"Yes," young Slim confessed.
"Now," said the old man, what did
you learn when you graduated. Come,
speak up if You want the place."
Nothing" said young Slim, still
more meekfy; "nothing at ALL"
"Thought so,' roared the old man in
triumph; "just what | thought"
You see" added Young Mr.. Slim, in
voice that Moses might have enyled,
I've don't learn anything when we
graduate; we have to learn it all be-
FORE"
Young Mr.. Slim deserved the situa-
ton, but he didn't get it, all the same.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1887-06-03

No. has Pullman Shopper New York TO Atlanta.
md Sleeping Car baltimore to Luray, Via IN. IN.
Il No has Pullman Sleeper Washington 10 New
Orleans without change via y. y. RAILROAD aud
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
WASHINGTON, FEBRUARY s, 1887.
A NEW GENERAL posTorFIcE.

Unless the old Seaton House is blown
down or burned up It is likely to be
occupied as the City Postoillce for some
years yet. THE CRTIc was In hopes
that site would be selected and the
new building put up and finished com
plete In time for the Centennial Celc.
bration of 1880, so that we could show
the Presidents and other high dignl-
tarIes Of sixteen American republics,
who are expected to visit us on that oc-
casion, tho model postoillce of the
couutry but just now there seems to
be no likelihood Of such consumma.
tlon. We shall be lucky. If enabled by
that tine, to show them the lot on
which we intend to build It!
Al other plans failing, however, we
have a new scheme TO PROFOUND. THE
CRIrrc is never at loss for suggestions
or expedicnts.
If there Is one thing better known in
Washington than another it Is that the
General Postoilice, although 1t covers
square of ground, Is of entirely in
adequate size for It's immense aud an
nually y.increaslng business. The oili-
Cials of this department are already
subjected to serious incDnyeniences IN
the performance Of their duties, and
the situation will necessarily grow
worse from year to year until the Gov
eminent is compelled to rent as much
oflice-room outside as the original
edifice contains. The absolute neces.
sity of new and capacious structure
during the next decade, suited to the
needs of the future, is quite as ap.
parent as was the necessity few years
ago for the extended accommodation of
the State, War and Navy Departments.
In fact 1t is high time that prelimi-
nary action was being taken in this
matter and that plans and estimates
were in course of preparation. The Sc.
lection and condemnation Of o site will
not present the same difficulties to the
General Government that are expert
enced in similar proceedings by Con-
gressional District Committees, and
some slightly location on Pennsylvania
avenue for the further ornamcntation
of that splendid thoroughfare, would
probably be decided on.
In this event, what more natural and
appropriate, or, all things considered,
better disposition of the present Post.
office Department Building could be
made than 10 turn 1t over to the Dis
trict of Columbia for convers on into a
city postofllce and District Government
offices. 1t would be of abundant CO.
pacity for all these uses, convenient
and central to the business portion
of the city, and being of handsome eX.
ternal design, would answer every
architectural requirement as to appear
ance. Its original cost was Si,1O0,'
600, and one.third Of it would be
enough for the District.
We do not offer this as a substitute
for any proposition that The CRITIC
has heretofore made on this subject, but
as the best alternative that can possibly
be suggested to harmonize existing dis.
agreements 1t is certainly definite
tangible and we believe, practicable
proposition, well worthy OF careful
consideration by citizens and the early
attention of Congress.
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
NOTES AND GOSSIP.

Rev. SAM. JONES prop1ps to s. restlo
next mouth with the sinners Of San Fran
cisco.
THE savings bank dcpos''or' OF III city
Of New York number GGO, ,i33 or about half
the population.
EN-GovERSoR BLACKBURN OF Kentucky
lg the guest OF Judge Joseph II. Lewis, at
Frankfort, anl is still In very bad health.
FoRTiricATIoN of the sea-coast has be.
gun, as an ordnance Office has gone to Pass
Christian to construct there battery Of
two two.inch guns Mail and Express.
IT IS announced that Miss Van Zandt
blushed when she was married to spies.
That blush ought to DO framed. 1t will he
interesting In the future us a curiosity
Omaha Republican.
1T is stated that Miss Mary Mcrayish OF
Baltimore, who went to u Carmelite con
vent in Belgium, will receive the white veil
on March 0, and that Cardinal Gibbon9 will
he present at the ceremony.
EX-SENATOR CLISGMAs OF North Caro-
lima says that the 2iroonia point will last
indefinitely and is therefore greatly supe-
rior to the carbon point for electric lighting.
There are large deposits OF zirconia In tue
ilu NOTtu Glult.
Jons L. SULLIVAN has given his mother
$1,000 "to buy o bonnet with.' That's q
tall figure for bonnet, and the probabill-
ties are that John expects the old lady to go
to the theatre good deal this winter
philadelphia News.
SAYS tho Atlanta Constitution: General
Twiegs had only one son. He is now the
assistant superintendent OF the mint at San
| Francisco. The generals Oldest daughter
married Mr.. Myers Of Virginia, and is now
a widow, residing IN Washington. Judge
| II. d. ID. Twiggs of Augusta Is a grand
nephew Of the hero Of Cerro Gordo.
TnE Cleveland Lcddr, which is generous
in quoting from The WASHINGTON CRITic,
now simply gives us credit with "W. c."
| No other newspaper In the country is SO
| well-known that the initials Of It's title iden-
| tiiy 1t. Nor has any man ever lived on this
| broad land Of freedom except tile incompar-
| able G. W. who does not need more than
| the initials OF his name to introduce him.
THE editor of Cdssclps Saturday MdgdsiRs
having offered prize for the best list of the
twelve greatest living men, 1t is worthy OF
| Of remark that Gladstone's name found q
| place In Iinety-nlno per cent. OF the voting
| papers sent in. The twelve who led were
us follows aud in the order named: Glad
stone, Bismarck, Tennyson, dc Lesseps
| General Wolseley, Marquis of Salisbury
von Moltke, John Bright. Lord Randolph
| Churchill, John Rusbin, Henry Irving aud
| II. NJ. Stanley. President Cleveland comes
nineteenth in a list OF forty.
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
THE CAR STOVE MUST GO.

II is strange that the inventive genius
of the age has devised as yet no appli-
ance for the heating of railway cars that
In case of collision or wreck would not
menace their destruction by fire. So
many accidents have occurred In which
more people have been burned than
crushed 10 death, that the need of some
safeguard against this appalling form
of torture has become too imperative to
be longer disregarded.
In all the catastrophes of the present
season, eliminating In the White River
horror, second only to Ashtabula In its
fatality, fire has claimed the great ma.
jority OF the victims. Singular as 1t
may seem, considering the violence
with which colliding trains come to.
gether or those derailed are thrown
down steep cmbankments or over
frightful precipices, comparatively
small number of passengers are killed
by the force Of the fall or conclusion.
Almost Invariably the cars, smashed
into kindling wood andSsaturated with
oils, are soon wrapped In flames and the
helpless or pinioned inmates are sub.
jected to the agony of slow cremation.
The time has come for the deadly
stove to go. Unless some safer process
of heating can be introduced, the cars
must be built Of iron or of woods made
non. combustlble and covered with
asbestos paint, or 1t were better that trav.
elers should make their winter journeys
by rail, without any fire at all. as
they do in sleighs and stage. coac hes
1t is hardly too much to demand the
peremptory inhibition of the present
methods of heating.
Another precaution that might be
enforced by statute Is full supply of
eXtinguishers on every train. The
glass grenades cost but tritle, take up
no room and could be arranged
throughout the cars in an ornamental
way, though railway officials generally
are understood to be prejudiced against
their use.
As all the coaches of a train are sci.
dom wrecked, there would be an abuu-
dant supply Of these effective appli-
anoes at hand In case Of disaster to ex-
iInguish any incipient confagration.
Had the Vermont Central train been
thus equipped, the fire could have been
put out SO speedily that none of the
passengers would have burned to death.
Yet so far as we are advised, no such
precautions have ever been taken by the
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
MEMORY.

My feet approach life's western slope;
Above me bends the MONDAY skies,
Beyond me spreads the realm OF hope,
Behind, the land Of memory lies:
l know not what the years may bring
OF dangers wild, or Joys serene;
But, turning TO the east, | sing,
Lord Keep my memory green.n
Oh land of winter and OF bloom,
OF singing bird and moaning pine,
Thy golden light, thy tender gloom,
Thy wales aud mountains, all are mine
The holy loves Of other years,
With beCk'nng hands toward me lean,
And whisper through their falling tears,
Lord, keep my memory green
Dear Memory whose unClouded gaze
Can pierce the darkest wilds of space,
see her morning watch fires blaze,
i feel her brecZes fan my face;
would not give the Hight she filings
Across my futures landscape scene
For all The pOmp and power Of kings
Lord, keep my memory green"
Let Memory near my soul abide,
With eye and voice to warn and win,
Till Hope and Memory, side by side,
Shall walk above the tides of sin
Till from llfe's western lakes and rllls
The angel lifts the sunset sheen,
And hangs II DER the eastern hills
Lord, keep my memory green.
-lJames 9, Clark
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
THE CATHOLIC UNIVERSITY.
The Order of sulpitian Fathers Said
to be.in Control.

The Order OF Sulpitlan Fathers Said
to be.in Control.
The Catholics Of this city, says the New
York Mail and Express, are somewhat sur
prised by the seemingly inspired announce.
ment that the Order Of sulpitian Fathers
will control the curriculum In the projected
Catholic National University In Washing
ton. 1t had been announced that no par
ticular order should control the college,
but that II should be run on an Independent
basis, drawing its professors from the best
available sources. This was supplemented
by the statement that II any change should
be made in this programme 1t would be In
favor Of the Jesuits, so renowned as teachers.
The Jesuits already control Georgetown
College in the District Of Columbia, and 1t
is an open secret that they have worked
day and night to secure the management of
the new university. Their failure will be a
sore disappointment to them,
The sulpltians are renowned as strict dis
cipliparians, rather than as successful
teachers, although they have graduated
from their colleges some men now high In
the American church. Their stronghold is
in Baltimore, and II the report before re-
ferred to is correct they no doubt owe
their success to Cardinal Gibbons, who Is
himself product Of q Sulpitian college and
who is an admirer OF their strict and thor.
Ough methods.
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
A Dracing Young woman.

Father-"When look at Jennie with her
bangs and that seven-storied hat perched
upon 'em and her big hustle and hear her
inane conversation, sometimes begin to
think that It has been labor wasted to bring
her up. ! don't think she has as much
brains as would fill hazel-nut."
Mother ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS How can
you say SOY That girl has got remarkably
powerful intellect. Why, she mastered the
parasol, handkerchief and postage-stamp
boston Courier,
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
A Juvenile Innocent,

A bright little boy, who is attending
school, rather innocently exposed the pa
ternal deficiency the other day. The teacher
was showing him how to write his name,
having set copy fof him to follow. ''Must
/ write II all alone ~ he inquired. sol
course,n was the teachers answer. spa
don't write that way" the youngster re-
monstrated. "IIow does he write ~ asked
the teacher. "Oh, ma takes the pen and
writes some, and then pa makes big letter
M Boston Budget.
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08

THE Senate's report in the Matthews
case only goes to confirm THE CRITICS
opinion that there's no politics in 1t,
and no race issue worth mentioning.
The reasons stated for the rejection of
Mr.. Matthews are substantially those
which THE CRITIC urged from the
outset as reasons why he should be re-
jected. 1t is a very plain case to all
who look at 1t from plain, common
sense standpoint.
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
ncvenue Ucform in ArKnnsns.

In the Ariansaw Legislature. Member
from White Oak Fork; "Mr. Speaker, you,
sir, have doubtless read something CON
cerning the tariff. Sir, am opposed to all
kinds Of oppression, and ! therefore move
you, sir, that We abolish the tarifT.m
speaker-"That power belongs ex-
elusively to Congress-"
"And hasn't the State of Arkansaw got
anything to do with itf"
"No.n
"Then, cir, was laboring under msap-
prehension. AS l arose to make motion
will withdraw my tariff motion, and move
you, sir, that We adjourn till l o'clock"
lArkansas Traveller.
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08

IT is NOT probable that the Hawley
bills, which passed the Senate yester-
day, appropriating sci, 100000 toward
ordnance and defense, and the House
Fortifcations bill, now In conference,
and appropriating $40, $40, 900 for sim.
liar purposes, will all get through, but
there is an unwonted air of business
about the proposed legislation, which
looks as though Congress were really
beginning to appreciate its duty in the
premises,
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08

INAsMUcu as it cost the country
S400, 900, 900 between 1866 aud 1884,
not to have navy, the New York Sun
thinks $50 ,O00,0 600 none too much to
pay towards getting one. And 1t
would have Congress appropriate this
sum in q lump.
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08

Mr.. PARNELr may be in poor physi-
cal health, but his speech in the House
of Commons last night against the Gov
ernments coercive policy in Ireland,
makes 1t plain that he has no mental
inflrmity.
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
AuCIlnM SALES.

CALTzsTEIN' JEwELRY AND or
- teal store, 918 + VI. N. w.-Entlre stock
of Watches, Clocks, and Jewelry TO be sold
at auction daily at 10 q. M and p. M. until
the stock will be sold out. Great bargains,
VIII continue the business with large stock
Of Optical Goods, Watches and Jcwelry. Re-
pairlpp.
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
She Knew Wnut Vic wantca.

Proud father (who has iust been presented
with on)--"tlossy, little daughter, which
would you like best to haye-a little sister
or a little brotherYi
Flossy (meltativelyl yl-"Well, papa, If It's
Just the same TO you, think I'd rather have
a little white rabbit,"- lIarper's Bazaar.
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
GENERAL AND CRITICULAR.
On the Avenue :

On the Avenue:
First Young Lady: Goodness, Fannie,
who is that heavy swell swinging along
there's
Second Ditto Oh, he belongs to the
Metropolitan Club.
First Dltto No; you don't sayS should
have thought the Metropolitan Club be-
longed to him.
Heard In society:
He: beg your pardon, Miss, but don't
admire your last name.
She: Great heavens, man, haven't done
everything in my power to change 1t Must
knock o man down with clubs
Heard at reception:
"Men are SO scarce In Washington So
ciety,n remarked Miss Lonecker, petu-
lantly, to Mr.. Monumen Talcollar and his
friend.
saw, ya-as, so have Observed" replied
Mr.. T., lazily.
"But," she continued, losing her petu-
lance in pretty smile, 81 always see you
and your friend wherever CO."
Both "men" jerk their necbs up through
their collars, pull down their vests and
withdraw, while the girl wonders wha. she
has said now.
~ want to see one of the editors" SAID a
lady, coming into the office.
(Which oneT' inquired the horse re-
porter.
"The one that wears glasses
"On his nose or under his nose?n
"Both, think" she replied, ,hesitatiugly,
and was at once directed by the startled
horse reporter to the religious editors &
room.
When Virginia mountaineer wants o
chew Of tobacco, this according to one who
has been there) is the way he asks for III
"Stranger, gimme chaw yer black fla,
chawin' terbacker; that Is, ef yer chaw.
dunno CT yer chaw or no; do yer chawp
A little darky's mother had given stric,
iniunctions against his whistling In the
house, and any infraction of law was fol
lowed by condign punishment. One day
she came in with his mouth frlghtfully OF
the pucker from eating his first green per
simmons, and his mother saw him.
"Min' what rse been tellin' you, chile
Doan you dah fo to whistle 'roun' heah, )
che screamed.
"Whistle nuflln," he piped in reply. ~
spec Use pizened."
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
trS5.THE FOLLOWING ORDER WAS
~ l.annl lN On nialn Inhnmaa w gunanna

today!
In order to secure compliance with law,
protection against Injury from frost, all ont
of.door water pipes and controlling fixtures
VIII hereafter be laid not less than three
feet below the surface of the ground In all
streets, avenues, alleys and private property.
The requirement will hereafter be rigldiy en-.
forCedm
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
COAL.
COAL.
LIVERY STABLES.
Sale and Livery Stable.

Sale and Livery Stable.
@. A. oRRIsoN, formerly of Alexandria,
Va, has bought the extensive Livery and Sale
stables of W. II. Geyer, dBs and 40 O ST. n. W.,
In the rear OF National Hotel. He will con-
tinue to maintain Its popularity as hiring,
livery and sale stables; also a Carriage Re.
the public patronage.
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
MONEY TO LOAN.

NEW LOAN OFFICE, 1909 E st IL w,
IN LA ToURETTE s. MOORE. Money ad
yanced on watches, diamonds jewelry, etc.
Old gold and silver bought.
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
FOR SkLE--.lOTS.

T II. GRAY u CO., 62a r st, Have
u. for sale fine building lots on 9th, lith,
18th, 10th, 18th, @, II, $, 4 and W SITS II at
investment prices.
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08

DROF. wHITCoMB has Reopencd
II his School of shorthand at ii13 G st n W;
class sessions Tuesday and Friday evenings.
wv TAsHINGTON Academy OF Toie-
w graphy has removed from Capitol Hill
to G3t + ST n W, RO0MS7, 8 and 0.
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
s15ssADMIRAL PORTER's GREAT
~ BOOK,
THE NAVAL HISTORY OF THE CIVIL
WAR

TIE only complete, accurate and official 10.
port of the services of the Navy throughout
the war, Including also the operations In con.
junction with the Army.
A companion to "Grants Memolrs.n
one volume quarto $50 pages. Hundreds
Of Illustrations. Illuminated covers. All
style Of bindings, Sold only by subscription.
W. Il. MORSE, Gen, Agt.,
Gai II st. n W.
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08

HENRY CLAY DEAN, formerly chap.
lain Of the United States Senate, died
at his residence in Putnam County,
Missouri, last Sunday. lie was n man
Of notable eCcentricities of character
and habit, but man of brilliant
abilities and one Of the most eloquent
and effective campaign orators in the
West. Many years ago he was a
clergyman of the Methodist Church,
but subsequently llrifted into politics
and the law. During the war he was
an ardent secession sympathizer and
was subjected to many indiguities on
that account, which finally forced him
TO leave Iowa, where he then resided,
and remove to Missouri. Ills residence
in the latter State, where he princi-
pally occupied himself with his farm
and books, was known as "Rebels 5
Cove"
The Washington critic., 1887-02-08
SPECIAL NOTICES.
espNCIAL NOTICE.

T-,IeT-EF
sS | have removed to SOG 81. n. W; Of
fee, G03 Pa, ave. ,Metzerott's music stOrel
Music for receptions, balls germans, etc T.
KRAUsE, Leader, National Rifles Band