davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01
Practical Jokes.

The conversation had turned upon
the RIGHTEOUSNESS of practical joking,
SAYS the Arkansaw IrGUeler, when
well-known business man said: '.Dont
speak of practical joking make
the merest reference to anything OF
the kind-for it makes me shudder
You all know Beasley, the commercial
traveller. He is an exceedingly good
natured and prankish fellow, so much
given to mild joking that on one occa-
sion, only few weeks ago. party OF
US decided to play joke on him that
he would not be likely to forget. We
didn't know exactly how to proceed,
and were tangled up in those perpleN0
ing intricaeies which come of numer-
Gus suggestions, when plan suddenly
presented itself. Beas!ey, having re-
manned in Chicago several days, de-
cided to go to st. Louis, where his wife
and little boy lived, stopping for day
at Bloomington to attend to several
customers whom he had at that place.
My plans were laid as soon as he made
known his intentions, but pretended
that did not want him to go.
Il must, said he Il wrote to my
wife several days ago, telling her to
address me at Bloomington, and, be-
sides, / have business there that must
be attended to at once.
/ .sThat night we went to the railway
station with him, and when the train
| had gone we hurried uptown and set
our plans in working order, which
were-diabolical, / admit-to have
Beasley arrested in Bloomington and
| brought back on the morning train.
How we chuckled when the officer
assured us that the arrest should be
made, and how we gloated over the
fact that we would at last get even
with our friend.
sssHe won't know what in the world
to think of it. said Sam Maytield. I'D
like to see his expression of counte-
nance when the officers nab him. and
hear his indignant protestations.'
4 ".He'll howl like wounded ami
NAL, remarked Joe Summers.
# "sAnd do considerable squealing,
too.' replied.
EARLY the next morning we hurried
to the station. Shortly after the train
rushed in, Mayfield exclaimed
They've got him! See, yonder they
GOMEZ
when the officers came up with the
prisoner we rushed forward and rOareC
with laughter, explaining that it wa'
all a joke. l should have mentioned
before that we had brought along .
man authorized to release Beasley
4 Our friend. even after finding out tha
it was all joke, did not smile, or il
the least seem to be relieved. Indeed
his face was deathly pale, and Dor,
such traces Of intense suffering that
was deeply stricken with remorse. ii
sat down with despairing drop ant
covered his face with his hands.
''.Beasley. sad /. approaching him
you must forgive us, old fellow. Re
member that You have played many
joke on US.
, Mot such an awful joke as this
, he replied. just as the officer
arrested me the following Telegram
from my wife was handed me.
He gave me the telegram, and
with a feeling of horror creeping owe
me, turned to the boys and read a
J follows;
"our little boy is dead. Hurry home.
"'MARY.'
mo" continued the narrator, ''yo
must never ask me to go into pra'
, teal joke"
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01
Dakota Piety.

A Sioux Falls minister recently went
out to another Dakota town to help
organize church. On his return his
wife said to him:
81 trust you were successful and
laid the foundation forsa prosperous
church society"
.'Wen, I'm afraid can't say that ]
was."i
why, I don't see what could have
preventedP'
''I'Il tell you; got those together
who appeared to be interested and we
talked the matter over some little
time9
''Well, why don't you go onP"
.'Why. they didn't appear to be very
enthusiastic, and to test the matter /
said: Gentlemen, / move that we
proceed to organize a presbyterian
church. just then prominent bust.
ness man arose and said: i move to
amend the gentleman's motion so that
instead of a presbyterian church we
organize board of trade and get up
a BOOM Those in favor Of the
amendment said I, will please rise.
You ought to have seen them get up
Every man stood up except one lame
man, and he was feeling on the floor
for his crutch. Some got up on the
chairs and one man tried to crawl on
top of the stove. When / came away
they were talking about moving the
cemetery to make room for a street
car line. Winnipeg Siftings.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01
A Great Problem in Regard to
steam Engines Solved.

Says the New York Commercial
Advertiser:
1t is perhaps strange, and to some
people it may look like The dream of a
dreamer, tU say that a steam engine
can ever be built that will drive back
the steam into Its own boiler to be used
again for the next stroke. However,
Cincinnatian has invented q mon
exhaust steam engine" that does that
very thing The inventor is now in
New York, and has had several meet
Jugs with W. b. Haworth and other
New York mechanical experts, who
pronounced it practical and revolu
tionaIy invention. This non exhaust
steam engine consists of four single
acilng cyiiudcrs, each connected with
common load I've pistOns OF same
are constantly at work, while the 9th
er two are SO completely balanced by
it's peculiar mechanism after the CON-
pletion of their stroke that but the
friction only (which is supplied by
the fly wheel) has to be overcome te
restore to the boiler the force Tor steam
that drove them forward.
| There are no valves, eccentrics.s steam
chests, cutoff devices, or many of thu
other delicate and Intricate working
parts RI Quired Every thing is simple
/ and cheap in constructions, and a saw
ing in fuel over the most economica
type of engine of from rs to 81 pc
cent. and u saving OF boiler room o
three quarters The counterbalanc'
is so arranged that iHstautaneously OF
passing the center IT at the deaf
stroke) as to be automatically trans
ferred from one to the other, causing
thereby an alternate working of on,
set, while the other returns (while il
ITS returning it is driving the steam
back in the boiler, and vice versa.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01
At Her Own Expense.

A New York girl visiting recently in
Philadelphia was. taken to the opera by
young man, and at the close of the
performance was asked to partake of
some slight refreshment in the way of
a supper She accepted the Invitation,
and at the close of the ,repast, was
somewhat astonished to see her escort
reach for her poeketbook, which lay
ON the table at her side, and coolly pay
the bill out of her money. This, it
seems, is customary in Philade1phia
when a young gentleman's means are
somewhat limited. It relieves his
lady friends of theembarrassment they
might otherwise feel on partaking of
any entertainment at his cost. 1t
struck the New York girl, however, as
being very ridiculous, and she began
to laugh. i fear you are laughing at
my expense" said the young man.
Let me explain. .".Oh, no." She re-
Piled. Il was laughing at my expensep
|-Indepeadent.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01
Leave Absinthe Alone.

1t is stated that the habit of drink
ing absinthe is more common to-day
in this country than it ever was before.
Of its evil effects one writer says:
"Tne poor wretches given up to alb
sinrnc-drinking suffer from peculiar
train of nervous symptoms, the most
prominent of which is epilepsy of e
remarkably severe character. The
last moments of the absinthe-drinker
are truly horrible. Absinthe; besides
alcohol, contains several ethereal oils,
of which the most important L; the oil
of wormwood. 1t has been often OBJ
served that the use of this beverage
results in disorders widely differing
from those caused by alcohol alone,
and the oil of wormwood has produced
onima stctanic commissions similar in
form to the epileptic form of convul-
sions which affect Observation-Disclosures.
Merchant IrdCeier.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01
The Intensely Boston Girl.

The Boston girl Is just trifle differ
ent from anything in petticoats have
seen elsewhere. She has none of the
style that SO markedly distinguishes
her metropolitan sisters, and her talk
in society is entirely made up, of the
fiippant badinage which is just now
the fashionable substitute for intelli-
gent conversation. For in this abode
of Intellectual cultivation it is con-
sidered the thing to be clever. and the
young woman who is not so must. at
amy rate. pretend to be. The result is
very sad indeed. No sooner are you
introduced to girl at a party than
she overwhelms you with torrent of
witty remarks. Not infrequently it
happens that in trying to be clever
she is exceedingly rude; for. under the
impression that ingenuousness is ever
attractive. she does not hesitate to
indulge in personalities SO frank as to
be quite iIi-bred.-St. Louis Globe
Democrat.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01
Rhode Islands Peculiartties.

She is, the only State that has no
provision-in her Constitution for call
ing constitutional convention.
-l She is the only State that requires
more than majority of votes to ratify
amendments to the Constitution.
She is the only State whose Consti-
tuition draws a distinction between ma
tive and naturalized citizens.
She is the only State whose Legisla-
tnre votes by secret ballot.
She is the only State that requires
the Governor to share the pardOning
power with the Senate.
She is the only State that requires
voters to register one year in order to
vote the next.
She is the only State that requires q
majority voteto elect all officers.
She is the only State that requires a
property qualification Of voters.-Bos-
ton Globe.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01
A Pleasant Time.

81 have spent most delightful
evening. Miss Breezy" remarked
young Mr.. Waldo, of Boston, who is
in Chicago on business. ITO a gentle
man far away from home an hour or
two such as l have just passed is
peculiarly grateful and refreshing"
"Thanks, awfully," responded Miss
Breezy.
.As it is quite early" went on Mr..
Waldo. Il would be very glad if you
and your mother would go with me
for dish of ice cream"
Thanks said the young lady
brightly. 81 presume mamma is
agreeable, and as for myself, Mr..
Waldo, my mouth is always wide open
for that sort of thing."-N. Y. Sun.
If the people of America would tine
half as much fault with their Repre-
sentatives in Congress as they do witt
their baseball clubs, this countr,
would be much better governed
Philadelphia Inquirer
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01
STEAM SHIP LINES.

TyICKETS on the following Steam Ship Lines
l. can be purchased from the undersigned:
On the North German Lloyd-THE RED
STAR THE AMERICAN, THE ROYAL MAIL
and THE FLORI0 RUB ATINO, AN Italian line
These lines carry passengers from New York.
Philadelphia ami Baltimore to any of the prin-
cipal ports on the European coast, and from
said ports to New York, PhilaGelphia and Bal
timore. Connected with these lines are Rail-
road transportation to any points in the inte-
rior.
J. n. DUSsEL. speciaIA gent
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01
Mount Union COLLEGE.

A Good, Cheap School for both Sexes. Stu
Dents can enter any time. Regular Courses OF
Study-Classical- Literary. Philosophical. Nor
NAL and Preparatory. Special COurses-Mu-
sical commercial and Painting. Expenses very
low. SPECIAL attention given to the Normal
Course.
For information Catalogue and Circulars
address PROF. JOSEPH l.. SKUNK. A. M Mt.
Union, Stark Co.. U. LEWIS MILLER. Pres. o
Trustees. Station and Telephone. Alliance, D.
Attendance large. and rapidly increasing.
Qa9-1vs
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01
Through Car Arrangement,

No 1, Pullman Palace Sleeping Coaches
from hornellsville b to Chicago ahd Cincinnati.
No. 5, Pullman Palace sleeping Coaches, and
regular Day Coaches Now York TO Shlcago wa
Mar on. and Chicago 4 Atlantic Railway lno
change Ior any class Of passengers) Also,
Pullman sleeping Coach Youngstown to Gin
cinnati. and Reclining Chair Gar Youngstown
to Peoria via Springfield and l., b. q W. KY
Parlor Car Salamanca TO Cleveland.
Nos. Pullman Buffet sleeping Coach. New
YORK 10 st. Louis, via. Cincinnati. In connec-
tlon with Ohio Il Mississippi k'y, also Pullman
Buffet sleeping Loach, New York to CteVeianu.
solid Train, New York to Chicago, consisting
OF Pullman Smoking, Day. Sleeping ana hotei
Coaches, via. Marion and Chicago Il Atlantic
hallway.
Regular Day Coaches, Cincinnati to New 1ork
mo change Tor any class of passengers: Also.
Pullman Buffet Sleeping Coach, Cleveland 10
New York.
No 4. Pullman Buffet Sleeping Coactes Gin
cinn sti and L h.cago to New York, and nom
CnIcxgO 10 Albany and Boston.
No. II. Pullman Palace sleeping CoaSnes
and regular Day Coaches, Chicago to New ORR
via. Marion, and Chicago 4 AtlanIlc halfway
| mo change for any class of passengers). ParloI
Car cleveland 10 Buffalo.
| No"stop-over" allowed upon Local T1ckets.
A. II CLARK, Asst General Passenger
| Agent. Cleveland, D.
J. K. SH ALER. General superintendent:
| Cleveland, Ohio.
| j. e. SHARP. ACCT.
| Ravenna. ..
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01

"You know, Miss Fitzjoy," said
young Smallwftte, I've got good
thing to tell YOU" 30, Pm delighted.
What is iepleaseP" "Tm engaged to
be married, you know, to Miss"
sWell Inn more than delighted.
was 30 afraid you were going to pro-
pose to me-" And Smallwitte doesn't
hardly know what she meant yet
Hartford Post.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01
He Had Suffered.

He was tall and lank, and thin and
lonesome, and he had a patent sash
fastener to exhibit to the public.
.'Say, have you shown that to any
railroad folks" queried one Of the
group. -
sNot byta jugfuln he promptly re-
piled. 49,.
"But why notp"
because the railroads once accept
ed q pstentgconpling of mine, and in
side year was bankrupt and the
coupling belonged to a train dis
patcher. - Wall Street Nesos.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01

An Altoona (Pa.) dentist was assist
ing in a tooth-flling operation, hold
ing a punch to press in the filling.
There was a vivid flash of lightning,
followed Immediately with a loud
crash of thunder. Instantly the as
sistant dropped the implement he was
holding in his hand and began to
expectorate vigorously. 1t seems that
he was in line with the electric cur
rent, and that is the way it acted on
him. Telegraph operators, we are
told, frequently have the same ex-
perience during an electrical storm.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01

4
How is it that you charge me so
cents for this little pinch of biearbon-
ate of soda when you gave me three
times as much for 10 cents yesterdayp"
Druggist-We are filling a preserip-i
ton to-day. Suppose we are going to
translate Latin for nothingP My dear
sir, you don't seem to appreciate what
it costs to obtain a classical eduea-
tion. Hold on! I've given you oxalic
acid. That boys always shifting them
bottles around.--Boston Transcript.
A poem in an exchange is entitled
s'They Had No Poet and So They
Died. = That was terribly sad. And
the calamity might have been SO ea-
silly averted, too! Almost any city in
the Union could have spared dozen
or SO poets, and would have gladly
forwarded them, free of charge, to
any point where such q singular ia
taiity prevailed. We don't know who
.sThey" were, but they should have
made their wants NorristosDn
HerGld.
Shakespeare seems to have been very
well up in most of the slang phrases
of the present day. In Henry VIII. +"
we have .stoo thin; in king john
.scome Off" and .'you are too gree n
and fresh; in "a Winters Tale, /"
saWhAta Neverp" and, although he
does not exactly use the exclamation
ratsl we have in Hamlet" "A rat! a
ratp which is pretty near it. John
Bunyan used the phrase st is a cold
day" in connection with adversely
6ostoss Courier.
Stranger-So that is your chief
cook, eha Strangei He looks healthy.
Hotel man-Healthy! He hasn't lost
q day on account of sickness for
years. Remarkable. very remark
able!' 'Some people have an idea
that cooks are big eaters, but this
isn't so. That man eats scarcely
anything. Why, sir, about one-half
the time he takes nothing, but crack
srs and milk ..Ahi I see. He
doesn't cook the crackers himself
Onsah0 World.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01
Rucklen,s Arnicasalye.

The BEST SALvE in the world for
suits, bruises, sores, ulcers, salt rheum,
fever sores, letter, chapped bands, chill
blains, corns, and all skin eruptions,
and positively cures piles. 1t Is guar
snteed to give perfect satisfaction, or
money refunded. Price 25 cents per
hnx. For sale by q. p. Reed. Ravenna
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01
PATENTS. ssSsat:; ssrss sna G5sSs esp,=

PATENTS, MARKS ia'si and Copy Cop
rights obtained. and all other business in the
U, 8. Patent Office attended to for MODERATE
FEES.
Our office is opposite the U. S. Patent Office,
and we can obtain Patents in less time than
those remote from AsHINGToN.
Send MODEL OR DRAWING. We advise as to
patentability free OF charge; and we make NO
(HLRGE UNLESS WE OBTAIN PATENT.
We refer here to the Postmaster, the Supt. of
Money Order Div. and to officials of the u, s.
Patent Office FJr circular advice terms and
refer also to actual clients in your own State
or County. Write to
q a. SNOW d CO.,
Opposite Patent Office. Washington. d. c.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01

One more whack at railroad legisla-
ton and the conductor will lave to
pay his fare like the passengers.-Saa
FrQnciscQ Alta,
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01

II bent ON camping out the proper
place 70 pitch ones tent would seem to
6e nine forest,--Detroit Free Fress.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01

The flesh of rattlesnake when cooked
Is as white as milk and very delicate.
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01
REAL ESTATE AGENCY.

Town and Country Property for sale or ex-
change.
We buy or sell. according to the demand.
J. n. DuSSEl.
offer for sale the following desirable prop
erty.
FARM OF $50 ACRES, in south part o
Aurora township Favorably located. Price +,
IS 800.
Glass Factory. Price, 50 600.
A NUMBER OF BUILDING LOTS In very
favorable locality, in this place. Price. from
$3.50 to $3.50.
FARM of IS acres in Edinburg. Price $780,
i. Fl DUSSTI-
The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1887-09-01
Cleveland & Pittsburgh R. R.

Through Coaches from KaVenna 70 Fltts-
burgh.
PULLMAN PALACE SLEEPING CARS.
On Fast Line to Philadelphia and New York,
without change, Connecting In Union station,
Pittsburgh, with Through Cars to baltimore
and Washington.
No. So makes close connection at Ali,
anee with fast through trains for Chicago and
Western points.
Eor Time Tables. Rates OF Fare, Through
Tickets and Baggage Checks. and further IN
formation regarding the running Of trains.
W d. ARMSTRONG.
Ticket Agt.. Ravenna, ..
Jas MOCREA e. A. FORD.
Gen'l Nahagor, Gen. Passenger Agt
Pitts6urRh. Pittsburg
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1887-08-24
The Toll OF the Funeral SeiI.

|
This is a favorable time 70 write on this
sad subject, as our town is. and has for soH.e
lime lecn, exempt tro:. Ge.th SO no
! oe-soa can suppose that :he-o a:e any PEI
sonel illusions Intended
| The custom Of to!iil.g tho church bell N
connection with the obsequies OF L deceased
person, IS of very ancient origin, and though
| 10: observed IN the cities ana larger towns,
is still adhered 70 n many smaller places,
and our own towa follows up the custom
Ne regard it as very objectionable ID sev-
eral respect,
l. The eject is distressing on the bereav-
el family. | heard lady exclaim some
nrue ago, VINO had Just been bercaved, The
torins Of the bell, ana the clo,;s OF earth as
they fell uoon the co:fir, were Ike dagsers
piercing nv heart" Another, too prostra.
al 70 attend the fEner.l Of her son, cried cut.
That horrid bell Every stroke p;ercas my
b4ar+, ~ Is the calamity IL the loss OF 4
Fr;e,,a ~ relst;ye not enough, without this
process of narrowing up the feelings by toe
tsollior Of the bel?
>. Tho practice must necessarily have .
very depressing eject upon persons VINO are
Ill at the time. The attending physician.
,urSa cr3 relatives while dong Ill they
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1887-08-24
n. -"
[A .i4S.h.

The instruction embracing Designed to furnish 10
eral education suited 10 the ordinary ocations OF lie or to III stuS m
the Freshman, Sophomore, !ulir class OF colleges
INSTRUCTION.
The approved text books used The blackboard deemed an
7og of autoris nvaEiab required
each pupil In all work Done whatever department and whatever tic
shall always be 10
require every rnI not time cr tie
class recitation then elsewhere 10 real be made SO long as
the pupil allowed day roctins only haitpeect lessons
TERMS aoSrIoF FOUR WEEKS;
Primary STU: si"'
s5AW and 90
SL'' ana d*N}
Music '!r9
cf5 months,
-.
Monday Friday aonth) o.Vo :
EoRAEEol3Gs
sagE DESIRE ESPECIALLY TO URGE UPON PARENTS AND
w Guardians the importance OF having their children at school
the day The student who late bcrs under serious
seldom takes that stand his class that otherwise ne
would have taken :,
Principal feels much encouraged at the hearty support given the
school heretofore and promises renewed efforts to make tie hoo "na "
should be--I'IIfST CLASS il respect.
S. 4. NETILES
Manning, c.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1887-08-24
Dr. II parro.. Of Yo.k, whose IL

Dr. y. 7. Parro@, OF Yoclk, whose i. :
ness has been mentioned II TINS paH:oF,
died on SATURDAY night the 2oth ins',
at the gco& old age Of four score AID
one Years. DR. Barron WAS one OF :he
most Influential anl prominent q /
zcns Of Yogl; County. He was a mem
Der OF the memorable Secession con-
ycnt;on of 1850 and oae Ct the slSners
Of tie Ordinance Of Secession.
VI. Wash Logan was severely IN
Jared BY the fast mail train on Tues
dav evallin:: the 16sh. between Dad
leys and Manning. lie was wa!kln@
in company with Nj. CnaHls on
the track unconscious otdanSer, wheh
suddenly they heard the wa.Elns SIG
nal Of tie coming tram. Both Jump
eJ from tllo track immediately With
out even locking back. Mr.: Chavls
escaped, but the engine OF the tram
struck Nfr Logan on the arm breaking
it in tive places. It was 6 miracle
that they were not killed. olr. Cha
Wis says he felt the engine brush hls
clothing. They,,th;nk they were pre-
vented from hearing the noise OF the
train sooner, by the rain which was
falling at the time. This should be a
lesson to teach persons not to use the
railroad track for walking purposes.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1887-08-24

The September ECLECTIC recommends Y
self by a gooily table OF contents. The place
of honor is given TO :: Lection OF En!a
Bey's letters from Centra -.f:ica, which
throws light on the career OF tl;s renarka-
bic man, to whose relief Stanley has gone.
Frederick Harrison makes protest against
the vandalism hidden n TIE attempts to re-
store ancient buildings, in themselves mas
ssrpieces The Scapcsoat" will be read With
attention by ali lovers OF art. The author OF
the article on Flags and Banners brings
together good deal Of curious archSeologi-
cal knowledge. Besides these tae-e are at.-
,aecous other articles OF equal merit, which
make the EcLEcr:c one OF the rnoss interest
ing magazines. Published by i. Il. Peiton.
% Bond Street, New Yo.k Tens. s. per
year; single numbers, IS cents; tri&l subscrip,
ton for three months 81. EcLEcrIc and
any 81 magazine IS.