The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1887-11-16
Fact and Fancy.

THE entire revenue of the postmaster at
Brownsville, Kan, last year amounted to
| but fifty-five cents.
Two Of Denman Thompson's daughters
made their debut with him in "The Old
Homestead " in New York last week.
a CENSUS of the unredeemed slaves of
| Brazil has just been taken, and shows their
number to be 100000, against 100000 in
| 1882.
WE are in favor of law to prevent men
| from working when they are sick, and es-
| pecially men grinding in edtorial-mills.-
Wilmington (N. ca star.
az MAY be small, but I'm a rouser" said
the hotel bell-boy, as he went the rounds
awakening patrons who had left orders to
be called early.-IiOtet Mail.
A MAGAZINE writer asks: "Should for
tunes be limited?" The trouble with most
peoples fortunes is that they are limited
very limited .-Boitimore american.
THE injurious effects of many liquors are
ascrbed by NJ. Bacchi to furfurol. This is
colorless liquid with a cinnamon odor
! Very small doses produce symptoms of lock-
jaw and epilepsy in dogs.
COUNSEL Ito witness): &c Is it possible,
Uncle Rastus, that you would swear to what
you know is not true for single paltry dol
| lar?" Uncle 'Rastus Indignantly: No,
sab! de gemmen guy me two dollars -
Jumpers Bdzdr.
A COMIC paper in New York lately sent
circulars to all the dentists in the country
urging them to subscribe. The argument
was that a man always feels dismal when
entering dentists office and that funny
paper would brace him up for the ordeal.
AN engineer on an Iowa railroad saw
| flock of turkeys on the track and, knowing
their habits, slowed up, blew his whistle
and got them off without killing any. The
owner, unobserved saw the proceedings,
ascertained the engineers name and sent
him the fattest hen in the flock for his Sun
day dinner.
:" MY family is very ancient" remarked
an English tourist in Ohio. 1t dates back
to the crusades." " So does mine replied
the Buckeye. My mother was crusader
herself And what "a noble stand they made
against the liquor traffic, too" " Aw," said
the Engishman, considerably mystihed.-
PHtsburg chronicle.
AN unfortunate mistake occurred in last
weeks edition. plaintively mutters a Gus
| ter county paper. We referred to Mr..
Taken, candidate for sheriff on the oppo-
sition ticket, as a 'rough-hewn diamond
1t should have been 'ruffianly demon. We
! trust our readers will forgive the mis-
! take. "-Omdhd Bee.
MALAGA grapes are arriving in larger
! quantities than ever before. About "a 900
barrels have been received the past week
and several large cargoes are now on the
way. Last year there were 125, 900 barrels
of Malagas received in this country, and
! unat was more IMAM any previous year, yet
this year 100000 barrels are expected.
Two scientists of Belgium have invented
a telephone which promises to work won
ders. The wire can be run along the ground
! through rivers or over walls, and so long as
| the wire remains intact conversation can be
carried on for short distances. 1t promises
to be useful on field of battle or to con-
meet gentlemen's residences in the country.
MATTHIAS SPLITLoG, the wealthy Indian
railroad-builder, who at the age of twenty
went to Kansas City with only fifty cents is
now enormously rich. He owns railroad,
several silver mines and many blocks of
property. He bought an axe on trust and
began cutting wood for steamboats, at
twenty-five cents a cord, saved money.
bought sawmill and then got married.
a CHEMICAL explanation of Ireland's dis
tress is that ii is due to too exclusive sub
sistence upon potatoes. Though health
full luxury, this food used alone supplies too
little nutrition to support people in other
than half-starved and dissatisfied condi-
ton. 1t is probable, therefore, that Irelaud's
woes would be greatly reduced if the pro-
ductive soil and climate were applied to the
growth of nutritive cereals instead of the
! tubers.
IT is with fortune like that of Monte
Cristo that the beggar endows himself in
his dreams, and he neither reflects nor I'M
| derstands that the possession of large sums
brings with it innumerable veXations which
are scarcely less hard to bear than poverty
And among these one of the most grievous
is the constant appeal for aid. One of the
richest men in Boston said to a confidential
friend the other day that he had actually
come to dread the sight of his acquaintance
on this very account
A SHORT time ago the father INDUCED in
that rare luxury, a full day spent at home,
and at one part of the day while the mother
was out, the child became so unruly as to
require correction at his fathers hands. A
few moments later the mother returned.
whereupou the child, his eyes filled with
tears and his little breast heaving with in
dignation, burted out, Mamma, dat hate
full man dat boards here hit me, he did"
| There is now man who seriously wonders
whether 1t were not wiser to so regulate his
affairs that, by being more with his family,
he might become more to his child than the
" man dat boards here. "-Boston Budget,>
THE proposed colonization of all the
Dunkards of the United States in the Pan
handle " section of Texas is a very large
undertaking. The Dunkards are peculiar
religious sect, whose chief tenets are a lit
eral belief in the teachings of the gospel
and in adherence of war. During the civil
war both sides respected their scruples
against lighting and exempted them from
service in the army a misprint in the con-
federate statute on the subject made it ap-
pear that drunkards were exempted
This was good news to the red-nosed men
| of the South, but their satisfaction was
short-lved, as the mistake was soon cor
rected.
A BUFFALO man who was recently in En-
gland tells of a remarkable experience he
had at fair in small village on the out
skirts of London. He was walking aim
lessly about the grounds when "A man
walked up quickly and said: Are you
working, or will you stand?" I'm stand"
said the Buffalonian, and he remained
where he was for about fifteen minutes
During that period the stranger came to
him three times and handed him money
At last he began to think he had enough of
standing" and struck out for his hotel
Soon after his arrival there he tumbled to
the fact that he had been doing "stool
pigeon work for a gang of pick pockets,
who had evidently made mistake as to his
identity, but he cleared about $50 by his