Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1887-05-05

nibals! The Wellesley flavor is delicious.
Speaking of drinking it may be obsetv-
ed that the man who "can takeit CT cave
ii alone" most always take 1t.
This is General Greelys FIRST sprisg a.
chief OF the signal service, and If its
sample of what he can do, what must the
genuine article beg
Some of the spring bonnets on exhibit
ton are real poems, while others hardly
come up TO the standard of jubilee
ode.
The knowledge that murder on the
high seas" is an extraditable offense has
caused great CONSERVATION among debu-
tante vocalists.
There is no truth in the rumor that the
president asked John l.. Sullivan how he
would like to be Secretary of War.
Actors, in general, may not know much
about architecture, nevertheless many of
them have been known to draw good
houses.
It is said that Theodore Thomas walks
ten miles a day. He is the very man
wanted to lead the New York American
National Opera company.
The country editor yesterday changed
the standing head Drowned While Skat
ing" TO drowned While Bathing" and
we know spring is on us with both feet.
Husband (impatiently to his wife,
told you | only wanted half cup of tea,
and as usual you've filled it up to the top.
Don't you know what half full isl
We never appreciate how much subdu-
ed humanity there can be found in man
until we see him playing dominoes with
his mother -in-law.
Strange that man has been given two
ears and but one tongue, when, as every
body knows, he would rather talk all day
than listen five minutes.
A Burlington woman lost her false
teeth, and when asked what was the
matter with her wrote on piece of paper
displacement of the jaw"
The "Rise and Fall of the Poet" is
what an exchange talks about to the e1-
tent of three columns, but in all that
space not one word is mentioned about
how many times he WAS hit.
1t is becoming fashionable in New
York for ladies to carry gold headed
canes on the street, and quite number
of important dudes are laid up with sore
heads.
student of the times thinks great
war in Europe would demolish the nobil-
ity and .end TO level the classes. Per
haps a soldier has no duty that he
loves so well es that of breaking rank.
The space-writing reporter will write
seven columns about nothing, and after
ha fin will
about the garrulity of the female sex.
Consistency, thy name is not man.
sentiment writer asks; Did you ever
watch a dear baby waking in the morn
ing Many times. 1t generally occurs
about 8 O'Clock and enables the father
TO get up splendid appetite for break
fast.
Don't you find the people around
here very sociable?" asked Cobwigger of
a new neighbor.
Yes, indeed do" was the hearty re-
spouse. "Only moment ago | met a
beggar, and he held out his hand to me-
Herr Most says the socialist will yet
make his mark in America. 1t would be
more 10 his credit if he would learn TO
write his name II is the fact that he
can only make his mark which makes
him socialist.
Judge exhibiting a saw edged razor)-
Is that the weapon with which the prison
er assaulted you: Complainant-Yas,
boss, DAFT the same razzer. Judge
Prisoner is discharged. Don't come
here again unless he tries to shave you
with it.
whats the matter, Pat?" More fun
in the family this morning, sor." eyes,
twins again." no, sor Faith and its
triplet5 this time" You're getting on, -
"Gettin' on, it is: By hiving, sor, be.
lave the nextll be quadrupedsl"
A LEGAL divine relates with much gusto
the unwonted honors paid him at re-
Gently attended funeral service. On his
arrival the widower-chief mourner ad.
dressed the assembly as follows: "My
friends, have the pleasure of introduc-
ing TO you Rev. Dr.. We'd better sing
something. Suppose We try the dox
ology."
Japan, with its boosted culture, is al
most as knighted as China after all. A
traveller states that no wine, whisky or
brandy has ever been manufactured there
Like the heather chinese, they take
bllhiN, which putS LutiA 10 steep, 4H5Lbhu
of drinking fluids, which would max,
Them feel like roaming around painting
the town red, killing their next door
neighbors, ana having a good time gener-
ally
Johnny was sick last sumner aad had
to stay in the house while there was a cir
Gus in town. Naturally, it did not sweeter
his temper, and his mother had TO talk To
him.
My child, she said, /" you must not
com plain because you are sick. tits very
wicked. You want to 60 TO heaven don't
you?"
"Yes'm,' he growled, but not till after
the circus. Alittle boy can 20 TO heaven
any time, but circus amt in town every
day"
Sullivan made great deal of money
/ by his rlugging match,o remarked Mr.
/ Syndicate as he laid down the morning
/ paper which he had been reading at th,
I breakfast table.
How is thati' inquired Mrs. Syndi
cate, who is not well posted about sport
/ ing matters.
Il was reading about Sullivan's slug
| cling match