The Dickinson press., 1887-08-20
SOME: ROMANTIC IDEAS DlsPELLED
BY AN EXPERIENCED "cRooK.n

BY AN EXPERIENCED "cRooK."
professionals" Only q Commonplace
Crowd After All-Their Number, Their
Profits and Their Skill All Exagger-
ated-A Transparent Trick.
Ihave been reading and 1 suppose every
body has been reading, too, about great
criminals in the newspapers. The boastful-
hess of the detective and the imagination of
| the reporter have combined to make some
interesting reading, but if you recall what
you have read you will find that very few
great criminals have been told about, and,
apart from murders, very few great crimes
nave been committed. One or two pro-
fessional forgers, a half score of burglars, a
| cluster of twenty-five confidence men, and
the whole list is exhausted. The fact is there
is no such army of criminals fertile of ex-
| pcdient, ready of device, watchful of every
| chance to break in and steal, as the police
would have you believe.
was looking over the criminal list the
other day of the convicted professionals coll
fined in New York state. They were numer-
GUS enough, but their crimes were contempti-
bly, small. To make your Vidocq, you must
have first your great criminal and his great
| crime. The American Nidocq makes himself,
with these two essentials left out; and having
| opportunity to talk with one of the alleged
great criminals, he confirmed my belief in
the visionary character of these shrewd and
clever rascals with no greater effort than re-
vealing his VIII stupidity. l hunted up
another, u professional who has repeated his
offenses sufficiently to cntitle him to any
| N{Ior ,1tc{i,,,tio, f1o, tlnA rs a- Ea,a.A
man. l would mention that he wears stripes
now, except that it might draw from the
value of his statements i'll the minds of some
who arc too easily prcjuditcd. Anyway he is
a better authority than the police, whose
vanity in their own capacity may DO a
proper pride, but leads to some mighty tall
lying.
"Tlle fact is that professional thieves and
rogucs arc not numerous i'll any locality, and
if crime were the sole source of support for
the few hundreds who arc so claSscd most of
them would be hungry many times every
year. Men who steal whenever they get n
chance always have some other occupation,
and it is a fact that the legitimate one is more
profitable than the illegitimate one in nine
cases out Of ten." Thus began my inform
ant, Wesley Allen, the pickpocket.
"But in this city there is a vast army of
professional criminals" l said, "mcn who arc
classified and whose industries ave special
forms, implying cunning and originality"
My dear sir, you have been reading the
newspapers or talking to detectives. There
isn't q dozen. If really clever men-if men
with a modicum of brains that belong to
clever pcople-weie to devote their talents to
roguery society couldn't exist. The methods
employed by thieves, for example, to attain
their ends look very cunning and we'll
planned to one to whom they are first re-
vealed. But take any one of them and cx-
anime it and you will see how flinlsy it is. A
sneak thief wants to get into the till of II
corner grocery. His accomplicc comes with
a tape line and begins to measure the side
wall in front of the door, or to measure the
wall, or comes i'll a wagon and begins to
throw out a lot. of boxes. The grocer steps
out to inquire; is held in conversation, asked
to hold the end of the measure or pass back
the boxes; the sneak is i'll and away, and the
trick is off. A saloon keeper is known to
keep a pocketbook stuffed with money in the
inner pocket of his vest. The pickpocket
knows it is u difficult place to touch. Two
accomplices come in when he is alone, both
measure. We'll, that was n dead loss for me-
Stl0 viz. oCU Clh ny. AiC luuSu, ilSh tlG
saloon keeper to drink and explain that they
were betting on the girth of a neighbor. The
saloon keeper becomes interested; the more
so as rounds are being called and then the
loser wants to get even. a bottle of wine is
staked and the victim asked to measure, the
new bet being on his girth. Objection is
taken to the vest; off it comes and the sneak
tllief-a third party-soon has the leather"
Nov, that's artful, certainly said 1.
mo such a thing; it is most transparent
and simple. 1t couldn't succeed if it were
not TINT the victim is n fool. But these are
exceptional cases of such good planning us
crooks can do. But, after all, suppose a man
of brains-real brains, such as you know
plenty of-were to devote himself to the
planning Of ways to get other peoples money
without IN equivalent, and Went at it with
the energy that men give to the practice Of
their profession or to the pursuits of com.
merce, where would such schemes as this be!
Nowhere. You hear of q great burglary.
The newspapers which report it dwell upon
the fact that it had been carefully planned
and that the house had been plotted, for
diagram which the rascals had left in theil
flight was found. What's to hinder any mar
from learning every room and every door ir
New York city? There's the builders plans
the insurance companies plots and the build
ing departments open files. A little watch
ing and a good deal of guessing makes up the
rest of the burglars knowledge. OF course
his tools arc of the finest workmanship.
Rats! Tho chances are ten to one that the,
consist of q bar of iron, which being carried
by q burglar is called q 'jimny;' n darl
lantern, q copper hammer, q chisel and u flasl
of powder and a handkerchief with holes in i
to see through for a mask"
"But there are cases where men have gon
further than make II few hasty preparations
have hired adjoining stores and tunncled an,
burrowed into banks and vaults with mini
patience and labor"
"Bah! How many? You say ten and
say one. Whatever you say l will allow i
per cent. off. But can you recall any!'
"Wcll, the Covington, KY, bank"
!, "That's one. You can't go on. But ther
have been probably twenty robbcries com
mitted i'll that way in the last thirty year
and none of them amounted to very much ii
the way of returns, outside of two or three
: You make up your mind to this fact, that til
y returns Of robberies are vastly exaggerated.
= philadelphia Times Interview.
| a Happy Millionaire.
= I think that the happiest millionaire that
: ever met is a man that built all the railroad
in Brazil, collected his doodle and retire
from active business forthwith. He drink
: whisky because he loves it, smokes five Ger
: cigars because they suit his taste. and amuse
. himself and his friends by staring steadfastl