davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register., 1887-06-30
GENERAL

"A second official report sets the
humber of building and loan associa-
tions in New Jersey at 156, with 81
730 shareholders and SO, 349, 900 net
assets.
The rule is unfailing-giving two
men of equal talent, health and fort
une; the one who laughs will live
longer than the other and accomplish
more work in the world.
-"Every tree is subject to disease"
said a member of tree-planters'
convention. "What ailment. can you
find on an oak?" asked another men,
Der. "A-corn," was the reply.
-"It seems to me that there's a hor-
rid draft coming from the parlor, ~
said mother to her son. YES" was
the reply; father is in there, and he s
raising breeze about that new sofa. :"
-Doormats made from scrap leather
made into links and strung on metal
wires are a novelty. The appearance
of these mats is good while they are at
the same time flexible, durable and af-
ford firm footing.
The immigration to California dur
ing the past year is reported to have
amounted to about 100, 900 persons.
Southern California got most of them.
and it is estimated that the money
spent in advertising that section has
been returned, multiplied by 1000.
Polite Passenger Tin street-car)-
"Where are you going, my pretty
maid?" Pretty Maid-'Pm going a.
shopping, sir' (she said). Passenger
''Won't you have this seat, my pretty
maid?" Pretty Maid-''O, yes, thank
you. sir" (she said). ).-Bostoa Budget.
superintendent Warner. of the AL
leghany County Workhouse, near
Pittsburgh, reports that the net cost
of that institution. from its organiza-
ton in January. 1870, until the close
791, Sc. Of 1899, 767,45 received from
the license fund, 1896, $50 has been re-
turned to the county.
"A subscriber to the Altoona Irib-
atne, w. 7. Marriott, missed his paper
repeatedly. and being on the watch to
detect the thief, discovered dog run
ming up when it was delivered one
morning and taking it from the door
made off with it. Mr.. Marriott called
to the brute to drop the paper, which
it did. The owner of the dog is too re-
spectacle man to suspect OF having
trained it to steal papers.
"A remarkable needle is owned by
Queen Victoria. Indeed, it is likely
that there is no other needle so won-
derful in the whole world. 1t repre-
sents the column of Trajan in minia-
ture. This Roman column is adorned
with many scenes in sculpture, which
tell of the heroic deeds of the Emperor
Trajan On the little needle are pict-
ured scenes from the life of Queen
Victoria, but the pictures are so small
that it is necessary to use magnifying
glass in order to see them. The needle
can be opened. 1t contains a number
of needles of smaller size, which also
contain microscopic pictures.
Opinion.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30
A DESPICABLE RiNGSTER.
Character of the Recently Elected Sena-
tor from New Hampshire.

Character of the Recently Elected Sena-
tor from New Hampshire.
Probably no reasonable person will
deny that the people of the United States
turned the Republican party out of
power because of its corrupt affiliation
with corporate jobbers, and because
offthe fact that many of its most con-
spicuous leaders were men of known
bad character. The transition from
Chase, Seward, Sumner, Stevens.
Wade, Wilson, Fenton and others to
Dorsey, Clayton, Chandler, Elkins,
Blaine and Malone was gradual but
marked. Under the first-named men
the party was not beaten. 1t was the
latter who led it to disaster. With
them at it's head it will be easier to
beat it the next time than it was IN
1884, and that they will be at its head,
REINFORCED, perhaps. by some spoils-
men and disreputables who have not
hitherto come conspicuously to the front
is, from present appearances, GER
tainty. Wherever the party has un-
disputed sway it clings to its discred-
tied and di5graced leaders. Inc
resurrection of the notorious Bill
Chandler in New Hampshire and his
election to the United States Senate
by the Republicans show that in that
section, as in many others, the immor-
ality of the party is its most consplcu-
Gus feature.
William E. Chandler is reprotated
not by Democrats alone. but by all
honest men who can see rascal be-
meath the guise of party. The body to
which he was elected rejected him SIX
years ago when he was appointed
Solictor-General. and more than one
honest man in that assembly publicly
stigmatized his nomination as the most
shocking that a President ever made.
The William E. Chandler who was for
wears a go-between in Washington for
the rings and the corrupt officials of
Navy Department is the same William
E. Chandler now chosen for high
honor by the Republicans of New
Iron County register., 1887-06-30
A SHREWD OLD DARKY.
He Propounds a Question Which His
Master Never Answered.

AAC AXopouhuS OueSGtOA WHICH
Master Never Answered.
General - is an old-time South
erner, very vain about his personal
appearance and very proud of his ci-
gars, which are about as good as can
be bought, for the General has plenty
of money. The General has a negro
valet who has grown old in his service
and feels that his long years of faith
full service ought to entitle him to
some privileges which would not be
granted to a younger servitor. The
old negro f1atters himself that he bears
a strong personal resemblance to his
master, and among his colored ac-
quaintances is known as "The Cine"
Of course General - does not rec
ognize this alleged resemblance and
would, without hesitation, shoot the
man who dared insinuate, in his pres
ence, that the remotest resemblance
existed. Yet among themselves the
friends of General - do say that he
and his old valet do, somehow, look
alike.
One day General -- gave his valet
one of his old dressing gowns. Soon
thereafter, General - began to miss
some of his high-priced cigars, and to
make his temptation lighter gave him
a box of cheap cigars together with a
strong hint of his suspicious. Still the
good cigars continued to disappear. At
last General - lost all patience and
plainly charged the old negro with the
theft.
you old black rascal" he thun-
dered, II know you've stolen those
cigars, and you had better tell me the
truth or I'll have you shot, hang me if
I don't"
The darky was too scared to speak
for q moment, but he wasn't long
without something to say for himself,
and as he went on with his defense
grew quite jubilant in manner, feeling
assured that he would be acquitted.
This is what he said:
"Now, Gin'el. l axes you to let me
'splain. 'Scuse me, Gin ell please. I
'clar fo' de Lord 1 aint stole dem see
gars. amt stole noffin' since I jined
de church, MORN six monts ago.
Gin'el, you members dat ole dressin-
gown dat you glib me. Well, when I
goes homo and puts on dat dressin'-
gown an puts bof my feet on de mantel
jes like see you do, my ole oman she
say: I 'clar Willyum Henry. yu does
look nifty like de Gin'el' An tells
you, Gin'el, Idoes feel pow full like y on,
but somehow amt jes like you. I
wants som'pin. 1 keeps thinkin' and
thinkin' wat it mout be. Den my ole
oman, she say agln: I 'clar Willyum
Henry, eff you jes had one oh de Gin ell $
fine see-gars yu'd look jes like him.
Well, Gin'el, when l gets one OBJ dem
fine see-gars l knows l looks jes like
you, 'cus 1 feels like you
But you old black reprobate,
broke in the General, ''why didn't you
smoke one of the cigars l gave you
and leave mine alone"
The old negro drew himself up
proudly, and looked reproachfully at
his master, while he replied:
'Gin'el, Use knowed you nigh onto
fifty yeers, an Use niver knowed you
to smoke poo see-gar. I doesn't
want to disgrace yer, Gin'el. Howse
1 gwine to look like you wild poo
see-gar in my moutP'
The General never answered the Ques
tion.-M Y Tribune
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

The statue of Liberty enlightening the
world, which stands on Bedloe's Island, in
the harbor of New York, is one of the most
sublime artistic conceptions OF modern
times The torch of the goddess lights the
nations of the earth to peace, prosperity
and progress, through Liberty. But "hb.
erty'' is an empty word to the thousands OF
poor women enslaved by physical ailments
a hundredfold more tyrannical than any
Nero. To such sufferers DIR. Plerce's Favor.
tie Prescription holds forth the promise OF
a speedy cure. It is specific in all those
arrangements, Irregularities and weak
nesses which make life burden to so many
women. The only medicine sold by drug.
gists, under positive guarantee from the
manufacturers, that it will give satlsfac-
ton in every case. or money will be re-
funded. See guarantee printed on wrap
per enclosing bottle.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30
NOTES ON MILKING.
Always Milk in the Same Order and BE
Kind to the Cows.

Always Milk in the Same Order and BE
Kind to the Cows.
Drawing the milk from the COW is an
everyday job-we might say, twice
a-day job. The operation looks simple
enough, and is quite easy for one who
understands it. None others should
ever milk COW, for it is important
that the milking should be done right
ly, rapidly and without hurting the
cow or producing any sense of uneasi-
ness. Many good mixers could not
tell you, if asked, how they milk. They
do it from habit acquired by early and
long practice, and without thought as
to how they do it. But a good mixer
opens his hand and grasps portion OF
the udder, pressing the milk down
into the teat and when his thumb
and forefnger come to where the
teat begins, they are tightly
clasped, so as to prevent a return OF
the milk to the udder. Then quickly
follow the second, third and fourth
fingers, each pressing the milk down
ward, until the whole hand is closed
and the milk is expelled. This is the
proper way to grasp and squeeze the
teat. Some milk with the thumb and
finger, stripping the milk out by let
ting the teat draw through between
them. This may be done with easy
milking, short-teated cows, but is by
no means a method to be commended.
1t pulls too much on the teat, and is
liable to hurt a sensitive COW. There
NJ mood of rN11lincr tho of oil oS
many do, the gentle, rubbing pressure
at first made on the udder being suffi-
cient to fill the teat. which should be
emptied by gentle squeeze, as
Just described. This does not
hurt the COW, unless the nails
may be driven into the skin
which should by all means be avoided
or the teat is sore, in which case it
should be carefully moistened and linn
bered with ointment before beginning
to milk. A good, careful, kind, rapid
and thorough mixer is a valuable
hand in dairyman's service. Al
ways milk in the same order. Let the
same mixer milk the same COW. fol-
lowing up in the same order every day.
The habit of expectancy on the part of
the cow is thus soon established, and
she is ready for the mixer when he
comes to her, and is not disappointed.
This regularity assures quiet satisfac-
ton, and the largest flow of milk Amy
change of mixers or break in the order
will be found to lessen the yield. so
readily does the COW fall into habit.
The hour for milking should always be
the same.
Be kind to the COW. She is by nat
are very gentle and docile animal,
and we might add, an affectionate
one. She soon learns to like those
who treat her kindly and care for her.
She is inclined to bestow upon her
mixer the love she would have be-
slowed upon her calf, had it been per-
mitted to run with her. 1t is neces-
sary that he should gain her conf
dence, at least that she may not stand
in fear of him. Some one has said,
Speak to cow as you would to 9
lady," Certainly she should be kind.
ly spoken to, and treated in way to
make her glad to see her mixer when
he presents himself. Then she will at
once '.hoist," commence chewing her
cud, and with dreamy look of enjoy
ment in her eyes, pour out the lacteal
treasure at your touch.-PrGirfs
Farmer.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

The treatment of many thousands of cases
of those chronic weaknesses and Distressing
Hotel ana Surgical institute, Bufralo, N. Y,
has afforded a vast experience in nicely adapt.
cure s Of Of woman's peculiar maladies.
Dr. Pierce's FavOrite Prescription
Vaneble fne Iesi eTpsrienoe. Thousands Of testimo-
malls, received from patients and from physi-
clans who have tested it in the more aggTa:
their skill, prove it to be the most wonderful
remedy ever devised for the relief and cure OF
bTt as moss perfect speeo for
woman's peculiar ailments.
As q powerful, invigorating tonics
a. and ' To- the Il womb womb and is appendases il
particular. For overworked, worn 3n.. out.
dressmakers, seamstresses, "shop-gir1s, house,
keepers, nursing mothers, and feeble women
fS n ery boon beinr
As i soothing and strengthening
aualed and is invaluable in allaying and SUBJ
DUNG nervous excitability, irritability, ex;
other aai distressing, nervous symptoms COM
monty attendant upon functional and organic
disease Of the womb. It induces refreshine
sleep and relieves mental anxiety and de-
iDr. Pierce's Favorite Prescription
compounded BY an experienced and skillfIl
physician, and adapted to woman's delicate
organization. 1t 10 purely vegetable m lts
ee3s IN any tbs Foi
morning sickness, or nausea, from whatever
cause arising, weak stomach, indigestion, dys.
pepsia and kindred symptoms, its use, in small
doses will Prove @ very beneficial :,
efve cure for the most complicated and OBJ
stinate cases of leucorrhea, excessive flowing,
painful menstruation, unnatural suppressiOnS
prolapsus, or falling Of the womb, weak back,
bearing-down sensations, chronic congestion,
Inflammation and liberation of the womb, In
f1ammation, pain and tenderness in ovaries,
accompanied with " internal heat"
tional action, at that critical period of change
from girihood to womanhood, " "Favorite Pre-
scriptfon " is a perfectly safe remedial agent,
and can produce only good results. It M
when taken for those disorders and derange-
ments incident to that later and most critical
period, known as "The Change of Life"
"FavOrite Prescriptions, when taken
in connection with the use Of Or; Pierce's
doses of DIR. Pierce's Purgeative Pellets ILittle
Liver Pillsl, cures Liver, Kidney and Bladder
diseases. Their combined use also removes
scrofnlous humors from the system.
"FavOrite Prescription - is the only
medicine for women, sold by druggists under
2 positive guarantee. from the manu-
case, or money will be refunded. This guaran-
tee has been printed on the bottle-wrapper,
and faithfully carried out for many years.
na19ig Large @ bottles az goo doses' $780, or six
For large, Illustrated Treatise on Diseases Of
cents in stamps. Address,
Worlds Dispanssry Medical Association, :.
663 NIain ST. PvrTALN. NV
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

FooD makes Blood and Blood makes
Beauty Improper digestion of food neces-
sarily produces bad blood, resulting in a
feeling Of fullness in the stomach, acidity,
heartburn, sick-headache, and other dys-
peptic symptoms. A closely confined life
causes indigestion, constipation, bilious
ness and loss of appetite. 70 remove these
troubles there is no remedy equal to Prick
ly Ash Bitters. It has been tried and
proven to be q specific.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

The action of the Senate of this
State in neither confirming nor rejecting
Governor Hills nomination for Health
Officer and Quarantine Commissioners
of this port, and thus leaving the pres
ent incumbents in Office when their
terms expired years age, is disgraceful
to the last degree. 7. Independent.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30
He Ia Still Running Madly.

A lady wearing celluloid hustle sat OF
a lighted cigar stump in an Indiana car
The lady was badly burned and the bus
tie and the cigar were both wrecked
Nothing has been heard from the yount
man W ho owned the stump, but it is SUP
posed that he is still running.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

The Five Sisters.
There were five fair sisters, and each had an

aim
Flora would fan be fashionable dame;
Scholarly Susans selection was books;
Coquettish Cora cared more for good looks;
Anna, am btious aspired after wealth:
Sensible Sarah sought first for good health.
So she took DIR. Pierce's Golden Medical
Discovery and grew healthy and blooming.
Cora's beauty quickly faded; Susan's eye
nervous and fretfu1 in striving after fash
ion, and sickly family kept Annals hus-
band poor. But sensible Sarah grew daily
more healthy, charming and Intelligent,
and she married rich.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

R. W. TANs1LL & Co., Chicago:
Everybody wants f'Tansill's Punch" sc
cigar now; they were always good but Of
late they have improved. l heartily ap-
prove Of your way of doing business, you
are sure to hold and increase your trade.
A. AREND, Druggist, Chicago, Ill.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

and Remorse to great political party in
1884. The three P's, when signifying DR..
Pierce's Purgative Pellets, bring Peace to
the mind, Preservation and Perfection of
health to the body.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

THE world astounded with the startling
and new disclosures of science on the poi
sonous effects of the alcohol in wine, beer,
whisky, brandy, etc. See the July number
of Demorest's Monthly. Price 20 cents.
Sold everywhere, or address w. Jennings
Demorest, Is East 14th Street, N. Y.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

1T is stated that there has been no in
stance of the failure Of oil to still trou bled
waters when the oil used was vegetable
or fish oil
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

A CHEAP thing in summer hats-a dudes
head. .--Philadelphia North American.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

If afflicted with Sore Eyes use DR.. Isaac
Thompson's Eye eWater. Druggists sell it 2oc.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

PIso's Remedy for Catarrh is agreeable
to use. 1t is not liquid or snuff SOC.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

WE hear of dress subdued in tono
They should sell by the score.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

A MANS funny bone, we presume, en-
ables him to laugh in his sleeve fonkers
.SfdtesmdS
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

To FIND out how old lady is-ask some
other lady.-Ddnuille Breeze.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

A BONE Felon-A person convicted OF
robbing grave.-Detroit Free Press.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

SHuN Ointments and Lotions for skin dis
InIIs His Hal Hair u and Whisker Dye SOC % Tie best.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

A MAN who has been flung over wharf,
ought to know wharf DER he speaks.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

FEARFULLY and wonderfully made-type-
writer copy written by amateurs.-Bosto~
Post
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

AT what age do men usually wish to re-
tire frasn lifel Hermitage.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

For woman to say she does not use
Proctor & CANDLES Lenox Soap, is to
admit she is "behind the times
Nobody uses ordinary soap now they
can get "Lenox."
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

In future visits to Legislatures in
the interest of his boom John Sherman
should carry Returning Board Wells
and Rutherford B. Hayes with him.
They might serve as awful examples or
shining lights, just as MIR. Sherman
chose. to pitch his voice on the burning
question of "fair count. ."-Detro1
Free Press.
Iron County register., 1887-06-30

"A second official report sets the
humber of building and loan associa-
tions in New Jersey at 156. with 81
7SO shareholders and SO, 349, 900 net
assets
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-12-07
Curiosities in Clocks.

"The latest thing in clocks is the
imitation OF machinery OF different
kinds, "said salesman OF John street
importing house. 1--WE have just re-
ceived some very odd designs in this
line from Paris. Here is q clock that
would make fine present for rail
road man." and he exhibited beauti
full white bronze model OF steam
boiler. 1t had a steam guage; safety
valve and speed regulator, and a Their.
mometer took the place OF the water
gauge. On the furnace door was the
dial Of the clock and above it was the
barometer. The whole apparatus was
about ten inches high and was mount
ed on O plush platform. The clock
was running and the pendant balls OF
the speed regulator were whirling
around merrily and doing the work OF
the pendulum
"Now, here is something that would
please anybody" said the clerk, and
he showed handsome windmill in
bronze and gold, with a clock face let
into the side of the tower. The. arms
OF the wind mill were moving in such
a natural way, that one could easily
imagine that he felt the breeze that
propelled them. Another design was
a well, built OF tiles held in place by
gilt frame, and an openw work we'll
house overhead, in which a bucket
was hanging suspended by q chain.
The bucket served as o. pendulum and
swung in q circle most mysteriously;
for it did not seem to have any con-
nection with the works of the clock,
which were concealed in the well.
"Herc Is something unique" said
the clerk, calling the reporters AT.
tention to an elaborate amair. "This
is q perfect miniature OF a boiler set
in a brick foundation. There are all
of the valves, gauges, steam pipes and
connections complete. The end OF the
boiler serves as the dial OF the clock,
and here at one side is a steam ham
mer moving up and down with great
regularity. and striking a bar OF brass
that is held by workman. That is
designed as present for a manufact.
urer. IL costs S65. Here is freak
OF the designer that is very neat. 1t
represents an old-fashioned vertical
saw at work. A workman stands at
the bench pushing a board against
the saw. On the front OF the bench is
the dial OF the clock. The great beau.
ty OF these designs is the perfection to
which the smallest details are carried.
We cannot turn out such work in this
country; it would be too expensive,
as it is all hand work, and at the
wages we pay our artisans. These
clocks would cost small fourtune."
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-12-07

ever been my good fortune to witness
beamed with qualification and shook
hands with the hackman. Then
looked at the detective second
time, when the members oil the family
came into the library, and said;
at seems to me that ! know YOU
Eyes, sir" said the man, family.
"You was witness in the Harbeck
divorce case, where was jagged for
collecting evidence"
"And you were sentenced for con-
spiracy, were you not?"
Eyes. SIR" said the man, dismally.
land served five months, and here l
am back in the same old business
again like a--fool, just for the sake
OF earning $l5 week."
at wouldn't surprise me II you
served another term, interrupted tho
brother OF the lady whom / accom-
panied home. ~ don't propose to
have o jailbird bounding any members
of my family unless know what it Is
for"
"Oh, you can wing me easily enough
il you want to-" said the detective,
dismally. "This lady amt done
nothing wrong. We're simply shadow
in her for the purpose OF gettin' onto
the habits OF q certain party that
handles trust funds"
He told us the agency that he was
working for, and the hackman was
sent for the head OF this delectable
institution. who. it appeared, lived
within six blocks Of the house. The
detective wrote q note to his supe'
rior which read:
"For Gods sake come with the
hackman at once. We're shared dead
sure this time, and they'll break us in
spite OF anything"
In a few minutes q flustered, puffy
and red-faced man hurried in brim-
ming over with apologies, pleadings
and excuses. He laid all the docu-
ments before us, and it turned out
that an ambitious youngster was dis.
putting his fathers will on the ground
that one OF the executors, q man
standing high in social and business
circles, was dissipating the trust
funds. He agreed to pay the agency
$40 day for every detective employ
ed, and gave list OF the houses that
the trustee visited. All OF these
houses belonged to people OF
unimpeachable responsibility and
prominence, but the mistress OF each
family was being logged like O criml-
nal, while the detectives bled the young
fool of o litigant. In point OF fact.
the trustee had not visited the house
OF my friend since December, 1886.
when he dined there with % party OF
sixteen people. This is fair illustra-
ton of what the New York detective
agencies are capable Of. Nothing was
done, OF course. What could be done
withoutarousing any amount OF pub
licity and talk? A statement in writ
ing was taken and duly witnessed, and
at o'clock in the morning the detec-
tives were thrust out OF the house. A
nice system OF persecution this, in a
civilized country, and the extraordi'
nary part OF it is that there is abso'
lutely no legal redress.
BLACKLEY HALL.