Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1887-08-12
Evils of gift Civ ln

Evils OF tit als1ll1 sssssssSss
. Sham and show. prep lexiity. a,ao
ancs and extrayag ance have crep 3
the custom Of Gift giyiing hot.e olas
may make gift out of the depth 81
The heart and do Is 50 becoming and
.unassumei YET 81 seems ass # dor
en- Influences were bearing on him tosss
force him into 3 greater expense
he can afford. or to- give here be is5
reluctant to do 50. % whore hs must
make q show Of the articles given
Quiet unoste ntatious, spont apeotls
giving shines bright when We Ind
1t amid the dreary heartlessness the
CANDY show and the heartburnings
that often accompany the formal giving
that is q part Of social life. ss5ssSss
ID The reader may call to mind some
wedding or birthday anniversary that
she is invited to help celebrate. Che 7
problem Of all proplems. even outrank-
ing the common IN hat shall i wear e..
then is, 'sWhat present shall I send re.
It is not enough to 90 and participate
in the social duties and to be cordial IN
we'll wishing and congratulatfon for
none of this will pardon the neglect Or
oversight Of the Gift. There will be the
question. Where is. Mrs. Jackon' 8
presentpr and then the unpleasant.
comment if she has made mono. So
Mrs. jackson sets ont to lind sone
compromise between pride and purse,
perhaps poverty, something that cost
no more than absolutely compulsory,
and yet looks as if it were worth Q
great deal more, something that the
other guest will not look at slightingly,
if not speak Ct contemptuously, or at
least think of in the same spirit.
. And the guests compare these prox-
les of themselves and put themselves
on exhibition, after q fashion. about in
the same way that they would do i
they were to stand up before COM
mittee Of critics and have the style and
elegance of their clothing passed upon.
The show is at last over, but the jeal-s
ousies and heartburnings remain,
the fear that responsibility has
been endangered by the 1nsigniticance
of the gift, Or the overlapping con-
seriousness of few that they each
made the best, or one of the best pres
ents of the lot.
Afterwards, as is more or less the
custom in some parts of the country,
the names of the donors and brief
description Of their gifts appear in
some newspaper, there to undergo
further comparison and criticism and
all the train of Accomplishments. Fin
ally,if the present was valuable enough.
it may find its way to shop where
duplicate presents are bought and sold.
SO little did the receiver care about the
personality of the giver, or of such
little use is it to the recipient among
several other presents of the same
kind. .
Gift extortion and compulsory gift
making are little less than sinful, if
they fall short of that. Gifts are by
no means always the token of friend
ship, and, when combined with the
abuses that are often made to accom-
pany them, they are demoralizing; they
are unpleasant features of what take
the form of duties, and they are dark
spots in social life. IT. r-
Something is wrong when present
is made test of social standing, or
when it is made the prerequisite for
performing social act. There is an
opportunity for reform when what is
apparently a friendly deed is confessed
ly empty of honest intent, when it is
burdensome, annoying. compulsory,
false-hearted, or made for show, or
evidence of wealth, or merely for social
conformity. ,
The only excuse that one can make
for these abuses of gift making is that
their compulsory features have the ef-
feet of putting people into the habit of
making presents at time when their
friendly feelings have not become
strong enough to prompt the act I'M
aided. With the growth Of the teel-
ings, the custom gradually gets a bet
ter and surer foundation, and stands
more plainly in harmony with civiliza-
ton. A gift should be an embodiment
of sentiment, from which cost should
be totally divorced as an element of
weight, and with which no social com
pulsion should be linked, except the
compnlsion of . spontaneous express
sion of feeling. The world IS not good
enough for this yet, but some attempt,
if only feeble one, if general enough,
would be a green oasis in the social
desert. Good housekeeping. ,ssts