Clarksville weekly chronicle. (Clarksville, Tenn.) 1873-1890, 1887-10-22
INSIDE FACTS.
OBSERVED AND CLEANED HERE
AND THERE.
A Chronicle Reporter attends church and
Hears Many Things His ups and
Downs, and Haps and Mis-
harsr Things and People.


Things and People.
The GAINESVILLE whispering associa
ton which Is composed of bevy OF
pretty young ladies, very innoeently
occupied pews Immediately behind
me at the Baptist church last Sunday
night. The communications of the
various members Mere quite enter
tanning from the fact that | got onto
the advance particulars of about q
dozen weddings that are to occur the
coming winter, but as there are many
hearts that would bleed in profusion
were ! to print the particulars at this
time, the entire report will be re-
served as "live natter to be used
at the proper time. The association
had much fun at the report Of one OF
themembcrs who told of the comical
way that her neighbor made batter
cakes; how the frost bitten flies tum-
bled from the ceiling into the batter
much faster than they could bepicked
out. One of the members told about
the miserable condition she had
found her winter hose in, a few days
since when 1t was necessary to put on
heavier wear. There was a handbook
ful of wooden stocking eaten into
small bits by moths and not even
a single pair could be picked out in
good condition. The moths had also
gnawed one of her silver garter buck
les in two. Several other interesting
topics We're dissected in great style
but during all the time the whisper
ing society was transacting its bust
ness, Bro. Case never fiinched in his
sermon.
My shins are skinned almost from
my feet to the knees, and | am
tempted to bring suit for damages
against the Electric Light Company
and ilearly everybody in the city
who are erecting new buildings. You
see my business as a Chronicleizer
keeps me on the streets at night, and
the glare of the electric light rather
binds me. Well, when rushing
along the pavements in this partial
ly helpless condition, / run into piles
Of brick, dirt and building material
piled up on the sidewalks and sever
al times have had close calls for my
life. / have fallen into cellars, step
ped into holes and stumbled against
the cn1s of planks in wooden side
walks SO often that | am used to it
and always fall on my soft side now.
Why, the other night when / went
home my iandlady levelled a shot
gun on me, thinking ! was tramp,
when the fact was | had only fallen
into one of these holes and mashed
my nose, stained my eyebrows and
crawled out loo king like victim to
the dukes of John l. Sullivan. This
state of affairs in Clarksvillo should
be sat down upon by Mayor Smith
and the aldermen. Its a horrible
thing to cripple up newspaper, re-
porter, but it don't make any differ
ence about young ladies and the com
mon public generally.
| am not much OF a growler, but
there is nuisance at the Opera
House that my friend, James T.
Wood, ought jump on real hard with
both feet. / refer to the aristocrats
who occupy the b ,lcony, where they
eat peanuts and throw the hulls
down in the parquette among the
pretty feathers and fuzz on the ladies'
tiny hats. These innocent hats
should not be made the receptacles OF
trashy peanut hulls and bits of the
evening programme the boys tear up.
| saw one young fellow up in the sky
parlor the other night with gumbo
shooter and he was sending wet wads
at the prettiest girl in the house.
She enjoyed the joke for long time,
but got mad when a soft, mushy wad
struck her nose amidship and strad-
deIed it. He might as we'll have
blown his breath in her face as &c
such trick as that. Next time he
does it I'll bounce him myself if hel
Lnn.I l, Too, lnu1r 70 rhSnnt tho INSULT