The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1887-11-26
BUILDING LIARS.
The Plaiat Of q Man Who Has Given Him.
self Into Their Power.

This world is macadamized with hars
to such an extent that you can scarce
ly believe what appears to be the truth.
Perhaps the greatest liar. as well as the
one entitled to the highest award. is
the building liar.
You call upon him in the middle of
May to see why he hasn't finished the
foundation that he said would be COM
plete in April. He will tell you that
March was so cold that men could not
work in the open air. and that founda-
ton made in such a temperature would
not last
When you ask him. little later on.
why the house is not lathed. he tells
You the man he engaged to do that
work is in the hospital, having only
two days before fallen off another
building in course of erection. Finally.
the lathing is done. and week or two
later you casually ask the builder il
there is going &c be any plaster put on.
He tells you the plaster can not be put
ON until after the gas-pipes have been
put in.
Then you go to the man who has the
plumbing contract. He admits frankly
that he is behind, simply because the
furnace pipes have not been put in. He
assures you that if his work were al
ready done, that the plaster could not
go on until after the pipes from the fur
mace were in also.
Then you go to the furnace man to
know why the pipes have not been put
in. He tells you that If all the furnace
pipes were in, the gas-pipes would have
10 go in, also, before any plastering
could be done, and refers you to the
plumber.
The man you engage to erect your
iron fence is not strictly builder, but
he is sufficiently identified with build
ing to lie fairly well. The fence you
order on the lst of March he doesn't
put up until June the Path, owing to
the, to him. pleasant fact that he chad
number of big orders from New
Haven" In all probability he never
had an order from New Haven. unless
it was an order to leave the town inside
of twenty-four hours.
As you are lingering about, you sud-
denly see strange dog come bounding
out Of the hole that is going to be win
doY. You ask where the windows are,
and a couple of men who are down in
the cellar pretending to be doing some
thing tell you that they have been dis
appointed in not getting the window
weights. Consequently, every window
waits till they get ready to put them in.
II you are not around on the look
out, or if you depend on an architect
to superintend the b uilding while he
sits in his New York Office, you will
get pine where the specifications call
for some thing else, and the some thing
else will be painted, that you may not
discover that you are getting the
wrong kind of wood.
II you have the work done by con.
tract, your house will not be properly
built until after you have been in il
three years But it will be built swift
ly--almost while you wait. But If you
have it done by days work, you won't
| get in for a year after the house is
promised. This is because the men who
work by the day are conscientious, and
take their time, and their time
money. Almost any time you can find
them playing poker on lime-barrel.
Then the house is not painted, be.
cause the Boston concern hasn't sent
on the creosote stain; and the mantels
can't be made, because the archit ct,
whose stock in trade is pair of eye.
glasses, has forgotten to send on the
| plans; and the patchwork is not fin.
ished. because the factory has not been
able to turn it out, owing to a fire.
After you are in you find your beams
are not the right thickness, and that
your double-foors are single; and that
the man who rubbed the vanished
closet-doors down with pomice-stont
didn't touch the insides You would
like to touch his insides with load Of
No. 8 shot; but by this time he is lost
to sight and memory any thing but
dear.
If Job himself were building house
to-day, his patience would not last hall
al long as the Patience" of Gilteri
and Sullivan did. He would rush
wildly from the building, and jump
against barbed-wire fence for COM
| fort and consolation.
For the average builder never builded
half SO well as he knew. Suppose. the
birds did not finish their nests until
some time in September! Suppose the
beavers didn't get their winter homes
built until March! II they didn't, they
would be on level with the builder
who promises a house in May. and
gives it to you the following January.
If we had our way, we would have
all the builders killed by architects.
Then we would have the authorities
hang the architects. .e