Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1887-07-29
FUN.

Bound to work-The apprentice
A FLOATING debt-A nortr,,.,
steamboat oased
The age in which to marry-n
parsonage. 'as
AposTEoPBEt to the gas-meter-
right, in the main. '"se
II is no honor, credit, or nros,
cheat person who knows less than
do.-Pomeroy's Democrat W.
CHAR1DY vas one of der card;
frtues-so vas a redheadcd fsma a
vimmens,-1"ret=cps lj,eehly. 's
THE wolf in the fable was in N.Y..
ure related to the sheep focks no a.
vas.ated, as he came in lambs kin W.
QuEEE-is it not THAT boso =,
should depend very much unon "a
pitcher and cricket upon the bowl Ss
A BALD-HEADED expression is ca,.
ally better understood than los
haired one.-Pomcroys Democrat I
SOMETHING peculiar about matt,
No matter how you drop it, it a]w.~
lights upon its head-if it lights at il
WHEN Longfellow wrote CRY not ;
pass, the old man said, he must how
had a premonition of the Interst.t1
law.
WHEN did Ger. George Washipc,o,
have his first ride in a public carrjae.
When he took hack at the cher.
tree.
WHAT an anomaly we perpetrstl
when we speak of the "waist of tjmo
since time never "stays "-Teras Sid
engs.
He must have been teetotaler VII
invented the terms of liquid measrrp|
since he "scruples" to take "dram u
TEXAS Siflings.
"SAY, didn't you tell me when vol
sold me that dog that he was bird
dog?" Eyes, that's what said." "Wel|
you swindled me. That dog wont
hunt" II didn't say he would hunt
He's bird-dog. Cook the birds id
him. That's the way he likes thed
best. "-Ne1cman Independent.
Mrs BLoBsoN was mixing some med
cine for Mr.. Blobson, who was sicI
when she was astonished to see nd
husband wink at her in very emphat|
manner. "What do you mean by winl
ing at me in that manner, Mr.. Blobson
she demanded. "F-force of habit
stammered Mr.. Blobson; "No, no.
don't mean that! I mean I have q
something in my eye." "Well,
haven't" responded Mrs. B. vii
asperity. Huntington Free Press.
SEVERAL years ago Elder Blodge
preached On Sundays at new Dako|
town on the lower Missouri. On WEI
days he followed the vocation of horI
dealer. One Sunday after taking b
place in the pulpit he said. M
friends, I am requested to annound
that the sewing society will meet 1
Sister Smiths Tuesday afternoon. I'd
Foreign Mission Society will meet Fl
day evening, and prayer meeting vi
be held in this house Wednesday eye
ing. Immediately after the seryicet
day there will be horse trot in n
back pastures All are invited to tarr
Let us join in singing the twenty -four
hymn. "-Dahoto Bell.
FRESH FROM THE CHURN.
Many drink lager, whether peasant or banker
While some are addicted to brandy and lin
l admit that for drinks of that kind iO1
banker,
And for whisky or beer don't care a pin.
| For I've got bev'rnge as ancient as splendid,
Which many, no doubt, will sneer Q.
spurn:
With sweetness and light" my tippls
| blended
a bowl full of buttermilk fresh from the cAr1
Friends aud companions, preach revival,
And now from my lips this true lesson lean
There's no drink on earth can compare with
| rival
| a bowl full! Of buttel milk fresh from the chl1
| III mud or in mire you never will wallow,
And You'll save all the wages you hone;
earl,
E-whenever you're dry you'll take for a sT
| low
a bowl full of butternlik fresh from theclI
Grip.
EAYEr BY LAND CRABS
In Zola's "Ventre de Paris" the he
Florent, who has escaped from Cavern