davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1887-05-26
PITT AND POINT.

The author who wrote There il
beauty in extreme old age, probably
never tackled an over-nursed egg
Chicago Merchant IrGUetcr.
True happiness. my son, consists
in finding that you have paid IS for an
article exactly like that for which your
friend had to pay three and a quarter
the day before
1T is but step from the sublime to-
the ridiculous; and the Sunday night
young man is spt to take it when her
father comes i'm impetuously at half
past eleyen O. clock.-Sossr,sat Of Edssca--
ton.
-Usgruntled people should hesitate
before they go in wftb > club to'hit the.
editor. The man who, is all the time.
putting heads on copy may possibly
have learned how to put head on an
unwelcome visitor: --sSonaerUiiles jour,
nal.
First Saleswoman-s'Of all the arr
rogant disagreeable people I ever,
waited on that woman is, the worst. L
wonder who she isa'r Second Sales
woman-''Why, that's Mrs. Chipp.
She used to tend at the same counter
with me before she was married. ~
Iyd-Bitss
-Clara-s'Can it be- Dolly. that you,
are to marry Mr.. Smith, after saying.to
me so repeatedly that you could not
/ endure hime' Dolly-"The truth, Isl
Clara DEAR. that until Eheard that his
aunt had died. leaving him fortune.
was deceived in my own feelings, to-.
ward him" -Harper's BGzar.
/ Old Lawyer to, young partner)-
:Did you draw up, old Moneybags'
/ wilfe'' Young PArtner-.'Yes, sir. and
50 tight that all the relatives in the
world can not find a flaw in it." Old
Lawyer with some. disgust) The
next time there is a. will to be drawn
I'll do it myself "-ProUidence Tsle-
gram.
/ Omaha Dame--.Of all things! Nj.
Blank, the dry goods man. has bought
that beautiful house across the way
Omaha Mantle can well afford to-
He is worth a million" .sWhy, who
| left it to himp" Nobody. He made
it in his business 81 don't see how.
He's always selling goods belowcost.."
Omaha World
"Omaha, Druggist-.sThat was a
strange blunder in Washington. wasn't
it?'' Kansas Dfuggist-'I didn't hear
of it." ..You didn't Why. promi-
nent druggist there killed himself by
taking drink OF aconite in mistake
for whisky ''Well. he ought to have
known, better than to keep drugs, in
his stock. "-0 Omaha World.
1t Wasn't Her Fault
/, Daughter, why don't you get marriedts
Ii Don't get beyond your day,
And growyold and thin, with pointed ichtn-
Il Whilesthe suniis out make hay.
Why, pa, nm,perfectly willing;
II But whatissa girl to dor
Il How was it'when you got married.
J. Did ma.p0p the question to youf
T Boston Rscoy1
I A New Haven jeweler has brought
suit for $40; 900 damages against alocal
I,paper for charging him with using bad
lIgrammar: IF he wins his case, we
may expect to hear of all the amateur
poets, and other newspaper winters.
I.who have their contributions rejected
because, of loose grammar and bad
Ilspelling,. bringing suit against: editors
for $D,0 damages. If the. editor
has. q large circulation, it would be
cheaper.to pay the $40. 600 than to in
sert some. Of the articles sent hin for
publication. -Norristos0n Herald
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1887-05-26
POET AND HIRED MAN.

r
xs POET.
Ho! verdant youth with rural mien,
Lend me thy soil-oegrimed ear,
That may probe thy rustic brain,
And learn the customs of thy spherei
Tell me, dost leap with lithesome tread
To meet the family blushing dawn,
Ere its su1using glow hath spread
Ger nature' Speak up, youth OF brawni
HIRED NAN.
Nav, don't rise until, thrice called.
The sound of brogans on the attic stair
Warns me that TIL be rudely hauled
From out my warm, reposeful lair.
And, as for Observation-Disclosures oti
My stiffened joints unbend with pain
i loathe to HE me from my feathered cot
And fain would turn and snooze again
POET.
Yet when the radiating orb of day
Diffuseth warmth upon the pastoral scene,
IT'S thy beguiling wont to idly stray
Meath shades of sylvan loneliness, ween
Or, mayhap, when the noon-tide CLARA
! Oppresseth with its parehing heat,
A calm siesta's thine to share
With nature in some cool retreat?
HREp-MAN.
Well guess not! Behind the pillow
slow trudge from morn till eve,
Nor pause to lave my subscribed brow
An instant, lest my boss perceive;
For, do daily for moment brief,
He bawleth forth his harsh behest,
And imprecates in manner past belief
GOSH but I'd dearly love to resti
POET
Still. awkward lout, oanst not divine
A sense of dreamy satisfaction or delight
When homeward with the meek-eyed kline
Thou ploddest through the gathering night
Doth ne'er some nobier thought infuse,
Thy being with soul-elating theme,
Whilst thou In bovine searching rambles mus
On some fond hope or cherished dreamf
HIRED MAN.
Say, stranger, you've been stuffed, fear,
With guh, for you must needs allow
That chasin' pesky brindle steer,
Or miikin' a kicking moelly cow,
Don't make hired man rejoice
In twilight scenes-but delay,
And Yon stern granger's lusty voice
Grows hoarse. Adieu, must awayi
Sidney BdrieU in Puck.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-06-11
A Funny Mistake.

MAN WHO TOOK OFT A DOG LICENSE TO GET MARRIED
"Is this the place to get license?" asked timid
young man, nervOusly OF Officer Spencer in The
collectors Office yesterday.
Eyes; right at that window. You'll have to wait
your turn"
The youth got into line and in the course Of hall
an hour reached The window.
NV mats your name and reSldence?" asked the
busy clerk.
Sc Walters, 95S ClybOurn avenue"
well, here you are-s2, please"
The young man paid the money, seized the
paper, and FASTENED out OF the room. Officer
Spencer, noticing the glad light in his eyes
as he passed. remarked to himself: "That young
teller must have a valuable animal. I'll bet 1t ui
break his heart II II ate some pizened meat"
As soon as he had reached the corridor, Walters
pulled out his license TO look at 1t.
"HOly smoke. What's this? Dog! Marry dog
By George! What Will Annie say?"
He Was paralyZed. He stood as IL dazed for some
moments, uncertain what TO do. Finally he sheen.
ishly Went back 10 Officer Spencer, who, when he
heard the young mans explanation, interceded for
him, got his 81 back, and directed him to the nv
mental window In the county clerks ONCE, where
he succeeded In getting the proper license. As he
walked away he could not help smiling to him.
SSIL.-CHlcuUO .NeUy,
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-06-11
Talk About the baltimore and Ohio
Deal.

Deal.
New York Special to the Baltimore Sum-
There were no developments in the Baltimore
and Ohio deal to-day, and the parties In interest
were evidently displeased that the Wednesday
night conference at Mr.. Ives house was made
public. There was much talk about the confer
ence to-day, and Mr.. Sully's presence is taken as
sure indication that he is in the deal in way
morning, and 1t Is announced that Robert
Garrett VIII postpone his departure TO
need not leave until the deal is perfd5ced.
Edward Lauterbach, who was guest
at the dinner said to-day that MI. Garrett did not
rst look out for the interests OF the city OF Bal
tlore which are very large in the road, and it is
likely that only enough stock will be sold TO give
the terminal system and the Hamilton and DAYTON
road an interest or representation in tie Balti-
more and Ohio directory, as these roads or systems
settled definitely yet, however. 1t may be some
time before the whole scheme can be made public.
George Gould again denied to-day that his father
nad any interest In the deal or in the b. and O..
Telegraph, and, what is more does not want any.
gentleman connected with the B. and o. deal
VINO was at the Ives dinner Wednesday night says
tnat the purchase of the control OF the Terre
Haute and Indianapolis was solely In the
interest interest OF the Cincinnati, Hamilton. and
dyton, In order to give value to its branch line
running from Cincinnati to Indianapolis. ''The
Hamilton and Indianapolis branch" he added,
o,,5s i6slng about year because IT had no
ou.i quite beyond Indianapolis: The Vandalia line is
controlled by lease only. This is not an effort to
ouss tne PENNSYLVANIA and no antagonism Is In
Tended The pennsylvania never did CONTROL this
line, and all the talk or cur purpose to use it
against the Pennsylvania is bosh. The Baltimore
and Ohio has nothing to do with the purchase OF
the IerTe Haute and Indianapolis. The only fact
that connects IL at all with the matter IS that Mr.
Ives ana MS party, who control the Cincinnati,
and OHIO. The deal with the Baltimore and Ohio
Is not consummated yet, but every part OF the
agreement has thus far been lived up to by both
parties i'll interest. Just what that agreement is
must decline TO say at present"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-06-11

PROHIBITION MEETING.-Hon. Bryan Callaghan.
mayor or san Antonio, Texas; Phil. Sharidan,
chief OF police; Alderman Degner, ex-Alderman
LOCKWOOD, Fred. Hern, IT,, CASHIER Of the San An
tonic National Bank, and four other well-known
citizens were arrested yesterday ON warrants
sworn out before the United States commissioner
by Judge W. III. Booker, a leading prOhibitioniSt
Charging the defendants with disturbing and
breaNing up prohibition meeting held last Tues
day night on a lot owned by the federal Govern
ment- The city council had previously refused
permission TO hold the meeting on the public
plaza During the progress or the meeting anti
prohibitloniStS gathered in large numbers rotten
egged the speakers, and broke up the meeting.
Inc aftdayltS embrace three countS-consp1racy
aggravated assault, and preventing freedom OF
speech The court sustained the first count and
reserved its opinion on the other two. The de-
PENDANTS were released on their recosnizance.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-06-11
Jir.. Penseyres Creates n Scene.

SIZE ABUSES HER COUNSEL IN COURT, AND CUTS Up
GENERALLY.
Incidents IN the trial OF Mrs PenSeyres for the
murder OF her husband. IN Buffalo, yesterday,
were very sensational. she abused her attorney
Mr.. john LaUgh-ln, ald when lie demonstrated
with her she looked az him ike q wild woman,
and, shaking her hand at him, said: ssYou are
doing your best 10 convict me, amt you?" and
then she cried again II her heart would break
She EnaLly turned her back 10 her counsel and
Elclt on the moor and rested her head on the
s.EdiT for long time and ElOaned aloud, so that
rhe could De heard all over the courtroom. A
ietter ia red ink las On the table in court Mrs
PenseyTe5 caught II and began 10 tear II up. Mr..
LauzhIin tried 10 rescue the letter and she broke
away HON his hands. she transferred the pieces
In lsr right hand % Eer mouth and began TO chew
Them .-Oh. God, you VIII hear NEE" said Mrs.
Penseyfes, and she arose and sank upon her knees
IL I-Jat OF the chair and began sODbing. Dr.
=sllgyl 7 Clark syyOTe that the woman was insane
-. aII not insane" erred Mrs. Penseyres. he said
81. va, labOf1lg under chronic meianchoua-
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-06-11
Curved Pitching Explained.

L. A. Proctor in Longman's Magazine.
When ball (or In fact, any m1Ssile) is advancing
rapidly through the air. there is formed in front OF
1t small aggregation OF compressed air. un pass
ing we may remark that the compressed air In
front Of an advancing cannon bah has been rem
dered discernfble-we can hardly say v1s1ble-by
instantaneous photography In shape the cush-
lon or air Is concal or rather conoida II the ball
Is advancing without spn and therefore 1t resists
the progress OF the ball equally On all Sides and
only affects the balls velocity. The same is the
case II the ball is spinning on an axis lying along
It's course. But in the case we have to consider,
where the ball is spinning on an axis square TO its
course. the cushion or compressed air formed by
the advancing ball has no longer this symmetrical
shape. On the advancing side OF the spinning
SURFACE the air cannot escape so readily as It
would IL there were no spin; on the other side II
escapes more readily than It would but for the
spin. Hence the cushion OF air is thrown toward
that side OF the ball where the spin is forward and
removed from the other side. The same thing
then must happen as where q ball encounters q
cushion ashanti. ball driven squarely against q
very soft cushion plunges straight into it. turning
neither to the right nor to the left or If detected
at all Gas against billiard cushion comes straight
back on its course; but II driven aslant against
the cushion, 1t is detected from the region OF re-
sistance. SO With the base ball. As the cushion
OF air against which 1t is advancing is not OBJ
posed sQuarely to it, but is stronger on one side
than on the other, the ball Is DETECTED from the
region OF grcateat resistance.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-06-11
THE LUTHERAN GENERAL srSop.-In the Lutb

The LUTHERAN GENERAL SYNOD.-In the Luther.
an General synod, at Omaha, Neb., yesterday Rev.
DR.. Valentine presented the report or the commit
lee on common order or services, which stated that
the work OF the committee was completed. and
would be published in few weeks. The report
was accepted, and the committee continued. The
hymn-bOok publishing committee was authorized
10 publish in all future editions OF the Book oil
Worship this common order OF services, and &c
publish In cheap form separate edition OF the or
have in use the books containing the old order Of
service, which Is now by this action superseded A
report answering the inquiries OF the hymn-bOoI
publishing committee was discussed by the Rev
Dr. Baugner. Rev. DIR. Billheimer and Mr.. j. w
Rice. IL was decided that all publications con-
corning the doctrinal teachings OF the church mus,
first be approved by the general synod.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-06-11

GIN SPTSOrAs NIECE RECoyERs--Mrs. Viola
QUINN tue vile Of Mr.. J. Quinn, OF New York, and
ti.- ,icce o. Gen. Frank SpiaOa, who attempted
suicide on Thursday, 10 Greenwood cemetery by
faEfgl, Iludahum on the newIy-in3de grave OF her
IatheT. L-ander SpinOIa, as stated IN yesterday
rTAk, had quite recovered yesterday morning from
TIE effects OF The poison, and was discharged from
the Lyty Island College Hospital In Brooklyn. She
Was escorted 10 the Butler street Police Court by a
detective and q charge or attempted suicide en-
tered against ner. An affecting scene TOOK place
between the delicate little woman ana her husband
ana brother who were in court awaiting ner ar
T1yai- she was released on 81, 600 bail, which was
furnished by her cousin, Ferdinand Mckeige OF
Hampstead. and was taken home IN a carriage by
her husband Her mind has been so affected, II Is
declared, since the death or her fatner as 70 render
AeT irresponsible for her act.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-06-11
An Unexpected Suggestion.

From the Merchant Traveller.
"Say, Gaddersby," said Mr.. Smith, as he came
into the hsh-store with lot Of tackle In his hand
81 want you to give me some fish to take home
with me. Kind DIX em up so that they'll look as
If they've been caught to-day, will you?"
certainly. Sir" said the grocer. "How
many?"
'Oh. you'd better give me three or four bass
Make 1t look decent In quantity without appear
ing to eXaggerate, you KNOW"
eyes. sir. But you'd better take white fish
hadn't your
"Why? What makes you think so?"
"Oh, nothing, except that your wife was dowr
here early this afternoon and said III you dropped
in With fsh-pOe over your shoulder and gener
ally woe-be-gOne look to have you take white fish
If possible, as she liked that kind better than any
other"
Mr., Smith took white fish.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-06-11
Expense Of Athletics.

From the Lewiston (Ae.) Journal May 20.
writer In the BOwdoin College orient calls at
tention to danger ahead, which, in his opinion,
threatens the well-being Of the college, and that
Is the great and increasing expense devolvtng
upon the students from too much attention to
athletics With less than $50 students, he says,
the college undertakes more in this line than DC
colleges having from 300 to 500 students, and at
least half OF the students here are SO far from
wealthy that 1t Is no uncommon thing for young
man to owe $1,000 when he graduates. Under
such conditions the expense OF supporting q
champion boat crew, base ball team, procuring
pense of 500 per class building six tennis courts
at cost OF $3.50, and keeping the college ntly
represented In the New England intercollegiate
Athletic Association, all OF which the writer
enumerates as coming within this years subscrip-
lions, does seem rather steep and gives some
subscription paper will soon be felt In smaller
classes and poorer athletic material unless stOr
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-06-11
Saturday Smiles.


Why man boots his dog but merely Shoes his
men mas never been precisely determined-Phild-
detphia Call
A Chicago man bought $3.50 incubator put 500
fly. He now brags OF having the only $500 blue
oottle NY In the country.-EIchange.
June Is the proper month In which to turn over
new leaf. All the commandments are In June
NeaO Orleans Picay,ne.
Patient dissatisfied with dietary restr1ction)-
.'say, Doc, Pm blamed If I'm going to starve to
death, Just for the sake OF living little longer.
Hdrper's Weekly.
Henry George-sCome and Join our Anti. Poverty
Society" Workingman-"Glad to doit Just count
me In" Henry George-"One dollar, please.
MISUNDERSTANDING no dollar" Henry George
Move on. This fellow behind you has money
we are not running any free snap."-Omaha Bee.
Mi. lngersoll has exposed his idea of heaven. 1t
Jteld Daily Nc,cs.
Strange that man should have been given two
ears and but one tongue when. as everybody
knows, hewould rather talk all day than listen
nve manifestation Transcript
Cholly-"I say, old chap what q noisy place the
avenue is getting to be-"
Gawge-"H0wS that, old bOy?"
ChOlly-"Why, you see, the girls are all raising q
oustle ana the boys are raising cane."-Ju .ge.
He-"I see that between sixty and one hundred
persons In different parts OF the country have been
poisoned by ice-cream."
GeOrge?"
He-"N-no; but some of them were very sick"
Suc (COlUT SLOW ~ DaCk)-'OHe cannot DE
too careful, George, where one eats tce-cream.
Hereafter let us stick to Delmonico's. "-Harper's
Buear.
Perhaps the reason OF Boston's cultured peo-
pie going Wild over Queen kapiolani was because
her skin is about the color OF baked beanS.-Cleue-
land Piandealer.
''Oh, you cruel thing!" exclaimed a lady to a
gentleman as he lifted poodle over brook by
Its TAIL While at the same time she swung her
little child by one arn.-Bu0dio Commercial.
News comes from Georgia to the effect that q
man In that State is ''uving pleasantly" With
his eighth wife. This shows the value Of
trying again II at first you don't succeed
Harpers Bozdr.
It is said that ". H. Doane, OF Cincinnati, makes
$4,000 year writing hymns. 1t cost San Fran
cisco man twice that writing hers. His vile sued
him for divorce and alimony, and got tr.-7exos
S!ftings.
The Bapt1sts are driving ahead, but the Metho-
dfSts are very provoking. AS we came through
OHIO they told OF us OF nm Old Methodist who b ad
just died, leaving $1,000 600 to Methodist col
lege.-Richmond Religious Herald.
Jones-"Have you family, MI. Smith," Smith
81 have two daughters Jones-"Have YOU no
sons?" Smith (sighing heavily)-"I have no sons
to perpetuate my name. 1t will die with iue"-
Teras Settings.
Fashion requires that the necktie should conceal
the collar button. The exception to the rule is in
Gases where diamond collar button is used, Then
the button may be exposed, as II by accident
NeW Orleans Pcay1tne
Oil the hinges OF the aged garden gate,
Spring her bright garlands is bringing
And the burden that the sofa bore or late
soon at the gate will be swinging.
Boston BUDGET
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-06-11
GEO. ". sT1CKNEY. Auctioneer. e3e F st

CEnd SAIC OE 4MPhOVED REAL ESTATE
ON MONROE STREET, IN UNIONTOWN D. G.
by virtue Of z decree of the Supreme Court Of -
the District OF Columbia. passed on the 9th day E
OF June a D. 1887. In cause No. 1O.3S7. equity MaI
DOCKET 20 IN which. cause William II. Brinkley is
Plalntn and James B. Osborn and others defend
ANTS ant N VIII se ct ppbc auction il front Of the
!S lss7 at HAIf.PAsT FIVE O'Clock p NJ. al
e. lot numbered seven hundred ana fifteen
1Fnm6a; and more particularly described follows
{or piscstaway road three hundred feet south
lot sold Geo W. Duvsll on or about the goth day Of
M91rSe street OF Piscstawsy road, southerly
hundred and thirty feet ll30 ft): thence at right
angles. eastery hundred and thirty U3O feet to
the piece q beginning, improved by : comfortable
Terms Of SALE prescribed by the decree: The Dur.
chase money to be paid In three equal installmenta
one-tmrd cash and the balance in and two years
respectively, for which the promssory notes OF the
purchaser must be given, to bear interest payable
from the day Of sale, and to be secured
trust on the property sold all cash. the
option OF the purchaser All cOnveyancing at purchas,
ef's cost A deposit Of 600 at time Of sale II the
terms OF sale are not complied with in seven days from
Gay OF eae the trustee the right at the
risk and cost OF defaulting purchaser after Eve dsy
previous notice In The Evening Star.
,.,,s.s. SAMUEL MADDOX. Trustee.
JeA1-o&os 462 La. ave-
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-06-11
The Central Asian Problem.
The GRAVITY OF THE SITUATION CAUSING MUCH AN

The gravity OF the Afghan situation continues
to cause anxiety in England. Reports are received
daily OF Russian military preparations along the
northern Persian frontier and on the Afghan
borders. The report OF Col. Ridgeway, chief OF
the British Afghan commission, has made deep
impression, 1t is said, On the Salisbury govern
ment- Several regiments Of Afghan troops have
deserted In response TO a proclamation from the
ameer or Bokhara, inviting enlistment under
Afghan commanders. The Russians have ad-
yanced 10000 troops near the frontier. It is also
said that famine Is imminent In khOraSSan, the
northeastern Persian province, bordering on the
MerOn district and Herat, and that the Russians
Will not permit the people TO emigrate.
Mr. Gladstone Is said to be thoroughly alive to
the gravity OF the situation In Central Asia and it
was this which caused him TO abandon his plan OF
unrelenting opposition to the irish crimes bill
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-06-11
Origin of Honeymoon.

From the Epoch.
1t may not be generally known that the word
honeymoon" is derived from the ancient Teutons
and means drinking for thirty days after marriage
OF metheglin, mead, or hydromel a kind OF wine
made from honey. Attila a celebrated king OF the
Huns, who boosted l.. OF the appellation, 'The
Seourge OF God, Is said TO have died on his nuDta
night from an uncommon enusion of blood, brought
on by ndulgtng too freely In hydromel at his wed.
ding feast.
The term honeymoon" now signifies the first
month after marriage, or much OF iu as is spent
from home. John Tobin, in 1.-THE Honeymoon, u
thus refers to It:
This truth is manifest-a gentle wife
Is still the sterling comfort of a mans Life:
To fools torment, but a lasting boon
To those who wisely keep their honeymoon.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-06-11
The Kindly Landlord.

from the Omaha Herald.
Landlord-"Good morning. Glad to see you
trimming the lawn, have notion to reduce your
rent"
Tenant-"That would be appreciated But I
was not trimming the lawn. | was gathering q
few plantain leaves. They make fair greens for a
poor man"
Landlord-"Do you mean to say that you are
supply 1ng your table from the yard?"
TenanC-"Just little"
LandlOrd-..Dear, dear. Itgrieves me to have to
raise the rent, but you know yourself that no gar
den truck Is mentioned in the lease"