The weekly sentinel. [volume] (Winston-Salem, N.C.) 1886-1887, 1887-04-21
MR.. BAGWELL'S LETTER.
A PUBLIC STATEMENT ADDRESSED
TO HIS FRIENDS AND THE PUBLIC.

Mr.. Bagwen Recapitulates his Religious |
Experience and the Circumstances Lead
ing to his Misfortune and Re-conversion.
In last weeks issue of the Raleigh Chris
tian Advocate appeared open letter from
Dr. T. Bagwell, containing the statement
made by him recently at Charlotte, N. c.,
The letter is four columns in length, and
knowing it to be matter of general inter-
est, we publish the essence of the letter in
condensed form, and regret that we have not
room for the whole.
Dr. Bagwell goes back and gives a full
history of bis experience since his earliest
profession Of religion at the age Of nine years.
He Joined the Conference in 1871, and was
assigned to circuit work for five years. In
the fifth year he came in contact with uni
versalism. To be better able to refute its
| arguments, he studied it from the stand
point of its own followers. Two years later |
| he woke to the fact that his own faith had |
been unconsciously undermined. Nothing |
more than doubt existed, however, and on |
going to Goldsboro he applied himself more
devutedly than ever to his work He says
for the first eight years of his ministry he
| was entirely consecrated to his calling.
On analysis he found to exist in his method
fodr factors which gradually grew more
clearly defined, as follows.
l. Ambition Not ambition for promotion
| or flattery, but to succeed at any honorable
cost.
3 A desire and fixed purpose to keep out
of old ruts.
3. An attempt to occupy rational stand
point in scriptural exegesis, or a habit of
subordinating the purport of inspired reve-
lation to the opinions of human reason.
4. Self reliance in maintaining positions
and reaching forward to aggressive success.
These methods involved the reading of
works on universalism, materialism, agnos-
ticism, characterization, Swedenborgian-
ism, second adventism &C., to the neglect of
the spiritual reading A tendency toward
skepticism was soon discovered, which was
, constantly fostered by mania for srecula-
ton and investigation. This tendency first
took a tangible form during his third year
at Goldsboro. On going to Charlotte in
1881, he found that he did not enter upon
/. his duties there with his usual alacrity.
I He was exhausted with over-work, and
= found that he was beginning to lose interest
and to regard his work task.
i During his last year at Charlotte he wanted
to quit the ministry, but was afraid. He
Y found himself in a most perplexing situation
d Just at that time. He believed it to be his
S duty to preach, but felt spiritually unfit to
n continue. During these doubts and difficult
a ties he confided in no one. When sent to
: Winston by the Wilmington Conference he
entered his new field of labor with a heart
It full of conflicting emotions and impulses.
If Just here we use the Doctors own words
n Tired, heartless, skeptical, distressed with
e dyspepsia, awfully respondent, annoyed by
o hundred things of hundred shapes, ant
e a myriad accusing, biting, burning tongues
my life was intolerable; and but for tn,
g tender ties that bound me to home, nigh
:. have received its "quietus with bare bod
y kim" Here manifested itself one of thos'
At laws of mind which every one has noticed
IF who has studied psychology from its practi
w cal and historic workings more than from
its empirical conception, viz: the tendenc.
Of one extreme condition to evoke the OF
posite extreme almost automatically. Thi
% is the effort of the mind for self preserva
~ tion-its revolt against oppression.
~ "Hence it often flies from the pressure
Gu consuming agony Or morbid dependency t
'e the extreme of Incorporate hilarity or ur
blushing effrontery, OF puerile and empt
twaddle. The itnptudences and improprie
lie ties THAT have injured me before the publ
Ill eye and damaged me in my own estimatio
ed equally as much, were perpetrated when
OF was in the midst of most intense ments
'r. struggle and under the pressure of ove
whelming difficulties"
~ He refers to his misfortune at Winsto
ce briefly as follows: al pass over my publ
n. calamity at Winston because it would
ut unbecoming to do otherwise, and furthe
because it is matter that do not care
Of. reopen. l am trying to let the dead pa
m bury its dead. l cherish to-day no relen
nd less luminosity toward any living persol
he There is no one on whose head would n,
ne heap Goals of fire."
,st After the session of Conference at Reid
no vi lie he returned to Charlotte, vindicativ
J. hardened, rebellious, and more skeptic
>" than before. He felt contemptuous indi
as ference for religion and the church. Whe
by he reflected on his condition, however, /
ly became alarmed, and at the announceme,
an of the evangelistic services to be held
n Charlotte by the Rev. Pearson be hoped
n might be benefited by it. He grew mol
N, concerned and was soon an earnest seeks
MT after the faith he had deserted The deaf