Los Angeles daily herald., 1887-02-13
A DETECTIVES LIFE.
The Every Day Side of a
Common Occupation.
AN UNROMANTIC OCCUPATION.
Little Excitement and Less Glory,
the Dime Novel to the Contrary
Notwithstanding.

Central Office detectives tho other after
noon, .'and that Is why there shOHld d
such fascination to uaOss persons aoOu
the life of detectives. l think ahO1
half the youth of America must hcls
their dearest ambition to be detscsIves
some day. l suppose the grea. Runhel
OF trashy. books thrown On the puSlis
every week which portray tie lifs OF :
detective as all exci.smeat sud glory I
responsible for most Of is-SOoks hizs
the lgrid stuff Published Over sAs name
of Allan Pinkertcn, and which ALLAN
Pirkerscn had about IS much 10 do witt
As you or had.
"Ths truth Is that there Is precious
little that il excisirg and still less 0i
glory IN a detectives life. Were moi
forever going about disguised and track
ing down express robbers and desperate
murderers at the risk Of our lives. ean
tell yea. There isn't one detective Ia
10000 that ever has any experience re-
mo.eiy resembling the wild tales that
are continually being told about Us. II
Fifth avenue milIioDsirss should be con-
tinually described as ha6itually saving
cords of wood every morning befars
breakfast, the public woufl shinS Il
strange, wouldn't it, But that Eealin' Z
be half as unnatural as constantly de-
scribing detectives rs unssrtking ssreug-
and mysterious crimes ty means OF
Ia red. hair or a broken tnokh-
pick. Tae average detective Is really not
much more than a xasehmaa- He dit
fers from an ordinary patrolmaa prinef
paliy in that he wears NO uniform. has
40 regular beat. and Is supposed - have
great ability and discrimination The
larger part Of his work Is not bit more
interesting or exciting than that CT tins
average patrolraa1. He mar reecgnizs
some old offender On the street and
run him in, watch some Important hViifgi-
ing, hunt up sSmsbcdy's stalen watch u
q pawE-shop, stay mp I'll righs IN the
ram OF snow to kesp "A eye O1 b0odfs
Alderman's back door. or 90 cut ts
| Chicago and bring back some criminal
who Is wanted here. Ii he IS good
looking AMI has q poiisasd address he
nay be assigned TO some ball or psrty
to see that the guests don't run OH with
The spoons, bnt ten chances to oGe Il
he's en- the fierce. twenty years he'll
never do any thing mere exciting
SIN order to get the prgciOus prIvilege
of leading shis h1mdrum and uneonfort-
able kind of a life, nlGss of us have
served hard spprsntieesaips IN tie
ranks of the police and demonstrated
the possession Of sense and Judgment IN
some emergency such as may never hap
pen to more than one man In 10 0C0-
THE WOULD EE pEEEcrlvES
sAre there many applications fos
places on the detective foresy asked {
curious reporter who had listsned 10
these eruphati, remarks
ssMany applieantsI 1 should sag there
were. In spite of all the hard hips \
detective has to go through. the rleagrs-
ness of his pay AMI his very doubtful
|standing IN the community, there Is
scarcely dsy passes ON which / don't
hear Of some fellow who thinks he Is =
Hawkshaw, and Is working al tas
pulls he can find to get n chance TO dis
Iplsv his detective abilities. Ii IL n
chronic Nuisance
| w hAt htE4 VI kSASt-1 az --A@
"All kinds, ages and Conditions and
both sexes. Some are erszy, no dcu5t-
The kind Of insanity that runs 10 iave7t-
Iiug car ccuplsrs and imrraesIca5le wash
ing machines in soms men develops into
wild schemes for tracking criminals N
Others. Not loGg ago Ius2setor 8srnes
Igos letter frem q man in Saring Lake.
N. Y, asking tor n place On the stztf,
He said the barn Of one Of the farmers
there had reeeatly hesn burred, and
that he bai traced the burning to the
IfarTaer's brothsr-in-law after every body
else had given the ease up - n hopeless
Imysteiy. He detailed a. length tle
elaborate sehsmes by which he had IN
lowered the crime. and ne thought thai
such Ingenuity in larger field like NSE
EYork would make bin an iEvsluAhR'
man. Salary Was no object 10 hsGs u
was good enough to add bsc=1se he
bad iit.la properly. Bssielss. n WIS
sure that Il ke had only had n ohsaes
to work up some big rsGrssr or ROBBERY,
such as he Thought occurred IN Ness
|. York eve-y dsy. he could very easily
deuonstrats h0sf much he was worth.
No doubt he could, bat wouldn't Eks
to try to live off the result. He was
crazy, Ike hundreds Of others wtS
write similar letters every week
, ssBut the worst thiag about i Is ths
way the mania affects the boys and
yoaag raen. / srl continually bssisgsd
hy ssms one Of them 10 use my init
, enes to GIT him plsce en- the force
: Tesy have been rsadJsy ths ehsap ana
, trashy libraries until they tsiek shsS
. have mastered the whole sessrea Of DE-
teetine CRIME, and they wosdsr that aEl
tobssscle should be thrown In sae Say .
| 4 taaa who knoss Just how Odd Slsutl
or Cart. Collisr' would g0 to work u
unravei sry mystery. They have La
. bibsd the yerv atnlospEsre OF CT rme 8
: thoroughly frOnl the rubbish they h2v'
read that when they tind they can't hun
criminals it mot irfrsqse7sly happen
that they becouae tine hunted zri dEsf
> IinsenssbIy intc tire ranks OF criminal
/ | themselves
mot long ago the respectable ans
{ lhard-workisg father OF gTaeelss
. scamp of boy np II my 1arsl came :
) me to inplore me to get his Sun Pl2s
On the force. He said his boy did moth
: | ing bat read detective stories all day an
? dream Of being detective all Dight
I tie would rot work nor % to seAcOl
5 aud was very likely to beccms utEsri
worthless unless has ambition wcr
> graf fed. TIE father IS sB eli friend Q
nine, aui thought / world do what
: could for the boy. 60. 10 his unspsaA
, able delight, took him cut exc nigh
|, 10 give him a practical ls son IN isseC
> i've work WAS watching en- sem
Z North River piers then fOr water thievs
!. Iwho eams scrcss from New Jersey j
{ might with stolen vegetables and fr1il
After hsa given as good specimen :
: could sf the reprinsnds we get sous
times for Isttirg somebody's stole
' Iwsteh 90 unfcusd. end Of the criticism
: we get from the nswspapsrs. va wer
/, doxn to the pier. II was a cold. blu
! ri.r zighk. with a heavy rain. VI