Wichita eagle., 1887-12-24

Words for Which No Possible Excuse
Cnn Be Ofered-Even the Fair Sex
Have Caught the MISUNDERSTANDING.
Not Beautifying
The era of slang is upon us with a
breadth that is almost appalling. Not
wholly the slang that might be defined as
the burlesque or colloquial form Of ex'
preston, the language of low humor, or
the iargon of thieves and Migrants, but q
species that is almost as reprehensIDlo-
1t Will not do TO apologize for It by say
ing that ''slang is probably as OLD as
human speech, " and that the early writers
INDUCED in it, especially the Greek and
Roman dramat!sts; and while we may
speak and write against the pernclouS
habit, we suspect that we will not grow
disguised enough with it to thoroughly
uprnot it until it has reached its china
The worst fact about it Is that 1t IS not
confined TO the low and the illiterate, but
has invaded the public schools, cultured
society and the literature of our books.
admit that some of the slang expressions
are forcible and full Of adeQuateness,
among which l might name fired out,
colossal check" etc. Still, even they
ought to he tabooed.
But what excuse can possibly be offered
for such words as "galloot, ''sardine,
''chump" Kicker ''kid, " etc? Or such
expressions as Let her 60, Gallagher, "
Waited OFF on his ear" II should
smoker" "Now you're shoutin'," etc
They are scarcely emphatic and certainly
not polite Even the fair sex have caught
the infection and speak about his royal
nibs, or the 'howling swell the girl of
today is ready 10 'bet her bottom dollar, >"
wants to know "what you're givin' her.
lets you know that You are ''oT your
base" and insists that you shall "cOme
off, - E'varnose, p" ''skcdaddle," "absquatu-
late, - and all that Yea do her a slight
favor and she exclaims, ooh, thanks, aw-
fully Why she should thank You with
reverend fear" is beyond your compre-
hension. Ask her to sing yoar favorite
sentimental ballad and she will probably
say, ''Oh, really. Mr. -, cawn't. It's
TOO utterly, too-toon'
WASTED SYMPATHY.
While playing lawn tennis with her she
suddenly cries out, ooh, you've given me
such a twist.' You feel exceedingly
alarmed: You are afraid that her collar
bone is broken or that at least her wris'
has been dislocated. You discover how
ever, that it is but tennis slang and that
your sympathy has been wasted. She
confidently tells you that Jennie Some
body IS mo good" and had the cheek
to propose 10 "atratch' her at the meet
ing of the club, because she hadn't
'iorked over the "spOndooucks" for
the last quarter. All that is TO be depre-
Gated, but the girls, heaven bless them,
look 50 pretty, and use the terms so art
1 h, 10
we're in my reproof
1t isn't pleasant to be accOsted ny ones
5-year-old hopeful as IAN old snoozer'' or
to know that he is lying in wait TO
knock the stufiin' - out Of q neighbours
boy, or to ''wipe up the floor" with him.
Or to hear our short skirted but high
spirited daughter tell the aforesaid brother
that she wishes the other boy would
paste him on the snoot, or ''knOck him
clean out the box" or into the middle of
next week" ! don't know that ! am es-
pecally sensitive, and yet | must say that
such expressions send the CreepS up my
back
The editor ''swings a nasty quill" the
hired girl is pot raStler;' when "A thing
suits us it's 'jUst the cheese:n when TOO
noisy we are told TO dry up. or to ''sus-
pend" when cuuningly on the alert we
say, mot ii the court knows ITSELF ii
one day is not available ''s'mother one
is; when we die We pass in our checks,'
are ''put away On ice" and are finally
planted so | might go on ad infinitum.
You can think, ! am sure, of at least q
hundred words and phrases to which ]
have made no reference. For inventing
cute words and phrases our country leads
the procession. They are clever and APP
prOpriate, get into the topical song, the
public "catch on" and they live and
thrive, and in many instances the diction-
airy finally legitimizes them.
Slang, | insist, is the fungus on the
stem. II is not the grated fruit. It is
tie scum of language Il often helittles: .
1t never beauties. If we al spoke and
wrote in less exaggerated manner we
would be less exaggerated in our ways of /
life and thought. life as well as speech, /
would perhaps grow more simple, more /
true, more worth living. Observer in /
Philadelphia Cali.