Little Falls transcript. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1876-1894, 1887-04-22
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Enects Of Marriage

many cases the change is an improve.
ment, q source Of enjoyment TO the
man himself and q subject for f1atter-
ing comment on the part OF his friends.
This is especially so with regard to
slovenly fellows, who often look, after
they have come into the hands Of 3
neat and energetic wife, as if they had
just gone through q Turkish bath, had
their cravats tied, and been fitted out
newly by q competent tailor. It is
with a shock of pleased surprise that
one meets g. man of this character
soon after his marriage, finding him
not merely clothed as of yore, but
his hair, and well-shaved. In fact ha
seems to have acquired new set Of
bones; his back is certainly straighter,
the shape Of his head is altered entire.
~ and q pair of well-defned shoulders
have emerged from the mass OF cloth
under which they were formerly con-
cealed. Nor is the change physical
only; the married man s morals has inn
proved. He looks out upon the world
with a face clearer and brighter than
it was in his bachelor days; and the
consciousness OF presenting agood ap-
pearance has raised him fifty per cent.
in his own estimation, and therefore
twenty-five per cent. in the opinion of
others. And all this is due to mar
riage-an institution that sages and
cynics in every age have ridiculed! It
is true that the improvement is not
always permanent, for affection may
wane, the wife may cease to interest
herself in her husbands appearance
and the husband to care for his wife's
opinion. When g. young man marries
an heiress the changes in his outward
condition are more subtle but none
the less interesting. Very soon-mi-
raculously soon, indeed-he becomes
a little stouter, and his walk is
slower, his feet beng planted more
solidly and more carefully than
they were when they carried bache-
lor. His clothes turn darker by one
shade at least, and his watch
chain is certainly a thought heavier.
The handle OF his umbrella, also, has
become percep5ibiy bigger, whereas his
scarf-pins are undoubtedly more quiet
in character-less fantastic or TRIVIAL.
Observe him on his way to q church
wedding for example, and mark how
different is his mode OF progression
from that OF an unattached and mis-
cellaneous youth. The rogue knows
that a good seat will be reserved for
him near the head OF the aisle and
that he has no occasion for hurry.
When he drives out it is in q substan-
tial dog-cart or mail phaeton, and he
escheweth--not perhaps althgether
without regret-the side-bar buggy
which he used to think the kind OF
vehicle that he would have if he wera
rich. He is now substantial person
in the community--a family man, a
capitalist by proxy and he begins to
| have serious views on political and
financial matters, which he is desirous
of discussing with older men. In fact,
he is rather given to stunning his con-
temporaries, and is not altogether easy
in the society OF his former compan-
and although he has gained in dignity
be has lost in freedom. His chains
| are golden, to be sure, but they bind
with the force Of a less costly metal.
No longer for him are the delights Of q
midnight cigar or refreshing brandy
and soda at the club. He is now the
victim OF times and seasons, and must
20 discreetly home when the proper
hour arrives.
Sometimes, again, the effect OF mar
riage is to transform an exquisite into
a sloven, especially if the cares of
poverty and Of an increasing family
rest upon his shoulders; or it may be
that he is a sloven by nature, and re-
lapses into that condition when the
vanity Of youth ceases to act as g
spur. Husbands of this kind COM
monty let their boards grow, never
| black the heels of their boots, and
have an irritating tendency to wear
rubbers IN fine weather. Their hats,
even if not actually shabby, are anti.
quated, and their trousers, besides be-
ing worn too short, invariably bad at
the knee. They wear long overcoats,
and carry either no umbrellas (relying
upon their old clothes for protection)
or else umbrellas huge in size, cheapin
material and warranted to turn in.
side out in a moderate breeze. These
men, If living out OF town, are sure to
develope q, fondress for poultry,
spending their Saturday afternoons
and Sunday mornings in pottering
! 1OOOI u6llGOOpS hnA WdGCiiAIlS tHo
strut of their favorlte cocks. They
care nothing for society, not much for
the theater, and are apt to fall
asleep over newspaper in the evening"
They usually prefer pipes to cigars,
and they are mighty drinkers of beer.
To such base uses may matrimony
bring it's victims!
There is still another class of men
upon whom the effects OF marriage are
slow, but sometimes cont iderable.
These are sly fellows who have no
knowledge of womankind, except as
they gradually acquire it from intima-
cy with their wives and from observa-
ton Of their wives female friends, who
are, of course, much less guarded and
artificial with married men than with
bachelors. Upon these unsophisti-
Gated persons the effects of marriage
are very reassuring, and they soon
find themselves at ease with young
and beautiful women. Sometimes, in
deed, they 60 so far as to carry on
Irritation, an achievement which
would once have been impossible for
/ them, but their efforts in this line are
always harmless and arouse no ieal
ousy in wives of sense. ...g:Ss s EsS
HENRY WELSH.
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