davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Irish standard., 1887-01-22
a DRY RIVER.
Why al Artist Turned Perfectly Green with
Wrath and Horror.

Why al Artist Turned Perfectly Green With
Wrath and Horror.
An eminent French art collector once
bought in Paris a landscape by a notet!
'.i1npressionist' which he showed, with
much pride in his purchase, to an artist
friend.
s:But ( Think quoth he, *:that the
picture lacks animation--jt wants per-
sonages. Now if you would paint for
NE man or woman on THAI road that
runs through the middle Of the land
scape, it would greatly improve the
picture"
''Yhat is easily done, ''said the artist,
so he carried Off the painting, and sent
it back in q week or two with a figure
Of an old peasant woman going to
market with her basket and her red
umbrella introduced on the road in
question, to the great satisfaction OF tho
pictures proprietor. Meeting shortly
after with the ''impressionist" who had
painted it, the artist remarked: II had
the audacity to alter a landscape Of
yours belonging to M. x. the other day.
J. painted an old peasant woman walk
ing down the road"
"Down the road2 [ remember no
work Of mine with d road in it. /
should like to see the picture and judge
Of the effect of your alteration. -
So the artist carried him off to NJ
KS, and they speedily stood before the
landscape. The "impressionist" turn-
ed perfectly green with wrath and hol.
rOr.
"Miserab]e man! he shouted, "what
have YOU done? That is nota road that
runs through the centre Of my work; it
is Il riyer!'- -Our lyuth.
The Irish standard., 1887-01-22
PERSONAL AND LITERARY.

| A professional solicitor: Of charity
says William K is the generous MEM
Der of the Vanderbilt family.-N. r
Mail.
-Congressman-elect Simmons, OF
the Second North Carolina district, is
possibly the youngest Congressman
elect in the country. He is but thirty
two.
President Robert Garrett, of the
Baltimore &, Ohio railroad, almost al
ways wears bunch of violets on his
coat. He has them blooming in his
conservatory the year round.
Lawrence Barrett, like other great
theatrical actors, has not allowed his
daughter to see a play or opera, and
is unwilling that she should have any
thing to do with the stage Chicago
Journal.
-Griswold Lorillard has introduced
in New York the fashion of wearing
coats without tails and scarlet vests.
He so appeared at the Tuxedo ball,
and created decided sensation. M 7.
! Graphic.
Mrs. Frances Hodgson Burnett a
directions for writing a novel are az
follows: ''You must have a pen, ink
and paper. Use the first with brains,
the second with Imagination, and the
third with generosity
--Sebra Croker who died in Stock
ton, Me, recently, aged eighty-nine
years, spent his life building ships. The
first of his seventy-four vessels was built
when he was tWenty-one years old, and
the last just fifty years later:
Several years ago Miss Julia
Thomas, a young colored woman.
! went to Europe as the Topsy in Uncle
Toms Cabin Company. She has re.
manned in Berlin ever since acting with
a white company, and has played
Topsy in German,
---Dr. Magoon, the eminent Baptist
minister, whose death has been an
nounced, was in his youth q bricklayer.
In later years the first brick ever laid
! by him was hunted up, taken from the
wall, followed out, richly set in bronze
and used us an inkstand -Phij0del lpi,la
Press
Jane Calhoun is living at Center
Vile, Ulster County, N. Y, at the age
LOG years. She was born, married and
lived all her days in the district, and
her age is said to have been verified
beyond question. She frequently
walks to Highland, four miles distant,
and though very shrunken in appear
ance is active and in full possession OF
her faculties,-N. 7. Tribune.
The late Mrs. Stewart had pc
culiar abhorrence of dark colors. All
Of the Stewart buildings were OF the
purest white, and she herself avoided
in her dress, as much as possible, all
somber hues. Mourning she laid of
as soon as conven5ionality permitted.
and even during its term she lightened
up its solemnity at home with whit''
ne egliges.--M Y. Herald.
The Irish standard., 1887-01-22
VITALITY OF SEEDS.
Reliable Information for Farmers Engaged
in Market-Gardening.


in Notwithstanding.
There is a general misapprehensioh
as to the length of time during which
seeds retain their vitality. There is
also a general feeling, equally un-
grounded, that seedsmen send out old
seeds that will not grow. Some ''bcx
seedsmen'' firms, who put up seeds to
be peddled out in the country, may do
so; but those in the regular trade send
out no seed that will not grow if given
the proper conditions for termination.
A case in point will illustrate:
A lady of our acquaintance conn
planned that seeds of celery were bad.
She knew it, for did she not plant them
as deep as the width Of her hand-a
pretty broad one-to get them in moist
earth? Is it any wonder that they did
not grow? Minute seeds, like celery,
must be sown not more than an eight
If an inch deep to insure termination.
AS rule the fault is more often that OF
the planter than the seedsmen.
The practical rule is that seeds should
not be planted more than four times
their diameter in depth. 1t is a safe
rule to follow. Another safe rule is to
press fine earth closely about the
seed.
AS to the vitality Of seeds, the follow
ing table may be taken as correct, if
the seed has been we'll ripened and
saved in the condition usual with seeds.
The Irish standard., 1887-01-22

"A patent has been obtained by a
gentleman OF San Francisco for what is
claimed to be fire and collision-proof
railway car. It is made wholly Of iron
and steel, and the weight will range
from sixteen to twenty tons for
ordinary passenger coaches and from
twenty ty-two to twenty-five tons for
sleepers. The floor is a single sheet OF
metal, and the roof also single sheet.
The beams are of rolled steel.-Sam
FRANCISCO Chronicle.
The Irish standard., 1887-01-22

An exchange has AT article on
s:Why Bees Make Honey" They make
it to cell.-Phi!a1elphla Ctzzz.
There is q shortage in the cinna-
mon crop, 1t will nutmeg much diff
ference, however -Phizndeiphin Cazl.
--Moire antique sashcs six or eight
inches wide are becoming more popu-
lar, but they should not be worn by the
more antique ladies. I. Ledger.
The meanest girl in the world bves
in Philadelphia "Pa," she said, 81
do wish you would. lend me your lovely
red nose TO paint nay cheeks with. ~
l'eI0s Sifjisags.
Doctor" will leave you this
medicine to take after each meal. 4"
Mike And will yez be kind enough
to leave the meal too. docther?" ?"-Iier-
chant l'roueic2
Van Daub--stYou are criticising g
6his picture 81 good deal. Did you
ever draw oneP'' O'Su]|ivan --'.Oh,
yes!n Van Daub-''And pray, where?'
O Sullivan-s<In rattle, me boy!"-
N, Y. Graphic.
---Circumstanti tial Evidence-"Uncle
Ben, how can you tell that your hands
are dirty -- they're so black, you
knowe'' sHe! he! wot q chile yo' is
Yo' see, honey, de water gifts riley. "
Harper's Bttzar.
-"My dear" he said, "what is the
difference between ingenious and in
genuousP" ''The difference between
u and i, my love-" she replied. and he
scratched his head for a diagram.
Washington Critic.
Buttons for female wear are be-
coming so large that they soon will be
big enough for the wearer. when she
is caught in rain-storm: to snatch
one off, stick it on hair-pin and use it
for an umbrella. Y. Mail.
-She-"James, do you know you
put three buttons on the plate in
church to-day?' He-"I knew what
I was about She-"James, perhaps
you don't know that [ bought those
buttons yesterday for my new dress
and paid fifty cents apiece for them -
-schuylkill County lyceums are
discussing the vital question whether a
good dog is of more value than good
gun. A dog eats more than gun;
but it doesn't go off and kill man
when it is not loaded. 1t is & difficult
problem to decide. e.-NorristoW1a Her.
aid.
Twas it love matchp' Not
exactly. She lived next door, you know.
Charles had read somewhere that few
women continue their piano-playing e
long after marriage, and he concluded
to trust to it. We didn't want to leave
the neighborhood you see; so Charles
married her. Very good of him, WASH t
it?''-Boston Transcript.
Much Better-..Do you think
Lucie will succeed in winning Alger-
non?" asked the high-school girl. ':No,
indeed" replied Amy; "she hasn't a
ghost of a show" ':My dear" pro.
tested the high-school girl, please
don't use such horrid slang as ghost of
a show;' say 'apparition Of an exhibi-
tion '"-Iid-Bits.
Omaha Dame-'.You seem very
fond of that Mrs. DeCash?'' New York
Dame-s.Yes, I wish you could meet
her. She is the most self-sacrifcing
woman in New York. ''Indeed!" 81
should say so. Why, her husband gave
her three hundred dollars to buy new
parasol, and she spent every cent OF it
for doctors fees and medicine" !" ':Ah,
I see''- eyes, poor little pet, but ]
really don't believe the dog would have
lived if she hadn' t. - Omaha World.
The Irish standard., 1887-01-22
HUMOROUS.

An exchange has an article on
':Why Bees Make Honey" They make
it to cell.--Phj!a1eiVllaa Ct1lz.
The Irish standard., 1887-01-22

In recent lecture Henry M. Stan
fey related the details Of his explora-
ton of Lake Victoria Nyanza, in Africa,
fifty days being spent on it to prove it
to be a single body Of water 2l,500
square miles in extent.-BoStoas Globe.
The Irish standard., 1887-01-22
1t is said to be a common practice

1t IS said to be a common practce
in New York City for ladies to hire
male escorts to places of evening
a1nusements, the engagement usually
being made with the messenger COM
panies, which employ sevccl youths
for that purpose.
The Irish standard., 1887-01-22
a Reward for Virtue.

Emperor William and Empress Au-
gusta have founded jubilee medal
which is in future to be given to worthy,
we!l-to-tlo married couples in Prussia,
Alsace-Lorraine and the Free Towns Gil
the occasion of the celebration Of their
golden OF diamond weddings. The
medal is of silver, bearing on the OBJ
verse the effgies Of the founders, and
on the reverse the Biblical words: 'sBe
rejoicing in hope, patient in tribulation,
continuing instant in prayer. Ro-
mans, ca 12, v. 12.'' To citizens Of
other countries also the medal may be
given in cases where the couples have
distinguished themselves by {: strictly
pure and pious life and by exceptional
domestic virtues, thereby setting a
good example in their respective COM
munities. Chicago Tribune.
An Irishnan employed by a firm
Under the hill recently went to glaz-
ing shop for solue glass, when the fol-
lowing colloquy took place: Visitor
Mr.. Painchaud, am after fixing the
windys on the top of Mr.. BIS shop,
and want twinty lights Of 14x10 glass.
Mr.. P.-I haven't any l4xl0, but have
plenty Of lOx14. Visitor (after medi-
tating deeply awhile and then looking
up with a satisfied expreYion)-Be ja-
bers, will take the 10x14. can turn
it around, and, faith, they wont know
the difference.-M. Z. L1depeudemt
Some years ago a mechanic neal
New Haven was riding in a railway
train, and was jolted and Jared as in
the early days Of travel passengers
were apt to be. He didn' t fret and fume
as the other passengers did, but began
to study and experiment. with a view to
making spring that would reduce the
jolting to minimum. He at last sue
ceeded, and his spring was adopted by
every railroad in the country. He is no
longer a poor young mechanic. His
name is Carlos French, and he has just
been elected to Congress from the New
Haven district.-Hartford Post.
1t is said to be common practice
in New York City for ladies to hire
male escorts to places Of evening
a1nusements, the engagement usually
being made with the messenger COM
panies, which employ sevccs4 youths
fo,. that nurnoge
The Irish standard., 1887-01-22

s#.. M. NJ. Follet and Mrs. A. T.. Smith
were married recently at Lake CITY.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1887-04-20
TIE TAX OF TIE DAY.

At o recent ball at the Hotel de Vile, Paris. the
drinks consumed included fifty thousand books, at
twenty confines each: two thousand five hundred
bottles of champagne and three thousand punches.
making average Of about six books, one-third OF
a bottle Of champagne and one-third of punch per
head. Tho sandwiches eaten only numbered four
thousand five hundred. a little over half sandwich
per head
Realism easily secured Omaha Paterfamilias
treadingl-" Mourning dinners are the latest Partisan
mourning and heavily yelled, compose the party.
The dnlngro room Is drapcd In blach, silver wreasns
chairs are shaped like collins set on end and hung
with immortelles. Knives and fork: have bones for
dinner is eaten In silence to slow music"
omaha Daushter-Are they given by people who
Eo The paper say, It only nan wh but
"Maybe. papa invitations are only issued to young
ladies whose fathers have refused them Dress
Omaha World
Tho author Of penny cook book in England calls
upon people do honor to the Queen In this jubilee
year ably cooking well and economically" and thus
help to lift up tho heavy weight Of depression that
lies the country by vigorous economy in household
matters" This would DO an eminenty sensible way
to celebrate tho jubilee
Tho growing Insecurity Of life in Paris leads Sig
aro' TO say that before long some Snowman at the
Neuilly fair will invite tho crowd to walk up and
see the most extraordinary thing to be mot with at
1875, and has attained tho age Of thirty nine years
This Methuselah Of the Seine walked nearly. every
venture6 up the Rue de la Chausee d'Antin a Quarter
Of an hour after midnight
Tho Registrar Generals "Annual Summary of
Births and Deaths In London and other Great TOWNS
Just issued. shows that London IL not only Of
the healthicst towns In England but that 1t is by
far tho hcalthest capital In the world. The follow
ing table shows the death rate per thousand In
number Of capitals OF the w0rlds
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1887-04-20
4 RPEDO TYVESTTGAT7 TON.

| Official instructions for the Torpedo Board
have been issued after protracted delay. In
the Naval Appropriation BILL approved July
| 26, 1885, authority was given for expendi-
ture Of $4,000 In manufacturing. purchasing
and experimenting with torpedOes of domestic
manufacture As this Is one Of the chief sub
jects of current discussion among foreign naval
experts. 1t was expected that advantage would
be taken at once Of the authority with which
Congress had armed the Department; but
month after month passed without any attempt
on the part of the Ordnance Bureau to supply
instructions by which the action of the Tor
pedo Board could be regulated. A brief adj
vertisement had been published announcing
the appointment Of the Board. and replies to
it were received from inventors and naval
engineers, but in the absence of detailed in
formation respecting the functions Of the in
vestgators experiments and a general exhi-
bition Of models and designs were impractical
bic. The instructions have been issued, how
ever, this month"; and this important work can
now proceed. The Board, cannot. it is true. act
upon the communications already received.
since the time for presenting finished torpedoes
is extended until April A. 1888. While Eu-
ropean navies are prosecuting this branch Of
investigation and construction with extraor-
binary vigor, and the most interesting event
in the annual man9uvres Of the English.
French and German fleets is torpedo practice,
the American Navy is acting with marked de-
liberation
The instructions to the Torpedo Board, while
long deferred are admirable in form. Sub
marine apparatus that is not complete in its
vox, ;s oxcIudod Tho finished tOrnedo cs must
he of service size and construction. with proper
appliances for launching them from a vessel,
and models and designs must represent the
precise mode of operation. The Board. having
decided by vote whether the torpedo shall be
tried, vessel and crew will he furnished by
the Government and the expense of the expert
ment will not be borne by the owner or in
ventOr. The qualities considered most essen
tal are accuracy, certainty Of operation and
explosion, velocity, range, ability to break
through or avoid hostile defensive distractions.
dcstructivencss, safety in handling simplicity
and noiselcssncss Special stress is laid upon
the torpedos ability to be operated with safety
from an enemy's fire, and simplicity and eff.
cheney of the launching apparatus. The Board
is instructed TO report upon a variety Of prac-
tical questions, such as the necessity for great
structural strength, the harmlcssness Of loaded
torpedoes when in store and the difficulties and
expense of manufacture A series of rules for
the conduct Of experiments is also furnished.
Tho instructions bear evidence of thorough
preparation. An investigation conducted on
the lines that are defined 10y the Ordnance
Bureau can scarcely fail to be of great prac-
teal utility.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1887-04-20

tably ropel and disgust eli serious and rejecting
friends Of temperance, Men who do their own
thinking cannot be persuaded that the cause OF
good morals u capable OF being advanced by
such preposterous measures. Public opinion
must revolt from an agitation 80 given over to
impracticality. and the general result would
certainly be reactionary. 1t is to be hoped,
therefore. that Prohibitionists who are gen.
timely concerned for temperance. and are not
merely using the name as cloak for third
partyism, will vindicate their reasoning
capacity and Judgment by frank Endorsement
of the Vedder bill and by joining with the
Republicans and the advocates of gradual
progress in urging this measure through the
Teplalcture
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1887-04-20
DEMOCRACY AND TIE CONSTITUTIONAL
CONTENTION

Just now the organs OF the Democratic party
are in full cry against the Constitutional Con.
vcntion bill which has passed the Assembly.
The burden Of their complaint is that the bill
is partisan in its nature: that ii was framed
so as to give the Republicans an overwhelming
majority Of the delegates to the Convention.
II is worthy Of note that the newspapers
which make this point against the Arnold bill
entered the canvass for members OF Assembly
last fall with the avowed purpose OF controlling
that body in order that David b. Hill or some
other Democrat might be sent TO tho United
States Senate. The Albany Argus" the
recognized organ OF the Democratic party at
the capital. gave its friends throughout the
State TO understand that if they all did the
best they could tho majority in the Assembly
of 1887 would be Democratic. Other leading
Democratic journals in the interior talked the
same way, and we cannot now recall even one
paper Of that kind of politics, significant or
insignificant, that conceded the Assembly TO
the Republicans. All of them remembered that
in the near past, 1882 and in 1888, the As
sembly had gone Democratic. and they argued
that what had been might be.
Were these professions OF their ability TO
carry the Assembly made in good faith by these
mouthpicces of the Democracy If So what
becomes Of their present objection to the
Arnold bill-that it provides for great Re-
publican prepondcrancc Does it provide for
a Republican prcponderancc in case the Dem
ocrats do as well at the fall election Of 1887
as they did at tho fall elections Of 1881 and
1882 If Governor Hills veto of the High
License bill Is as strong and popular as they
CIV IL IL what makes them believe that they
are not going to carry the Assembly districts
this fall I To be sure for several years they
have lost the Assembly but are they not aware
that ait is always darkest just before day ~
Democrats mako two or three other objections
to the Convention bill. But they lay no stress
upon them, combining themselves for the most
part to angry protests against the craftsmanship
of the measure. Now. on second thought, are
they quito sure that the protests are well
founded
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1887-04-20
AN APRIL LAY.

AN APRIL LAY.
l.
The April sun Is out
Tho merry urchins Shouts
With glec. on thor way thoy go to school, school,
The sparrows ohirp their Joys.
And soon the little boys
VIII peoi to go swimming In the pool pool, pool
With spade and hoe and rake
Tho citizen doth make
garden bed In which to SOW his seods seeds, Seeds
And when his work Is done
In scratching up tho sprinsins flowers and weeds
In groves tho foathered throng
Break forth In richest song,
Tho season naught to make US Joyful lacks. lacks,
The days arc bright with sun,
And ladies shed their glossy soaisn sacques, saoques
sacques.
When in tho April sky
Tho IL riding high,
And vcrnal with sudden gust gust gust,
The WOO &c, doth ha our hearts,
Refrain nom coming out to lay the dust dust dust
VBoston Courier.
There is q dentist In Michigan town the sign
whose door reads: "Teeth Extracted without
Emmy Pane Latin Gas t1o) Cents o la Hap
young lady went into q store TO purchase q
diary. and had about concluded to secure one shown
her. when she changed her mind and said: al guess
III u purse f0r Inc An O.u lady stand
Ing near. and who only partially heard the foregoing
announcements, went over and sad in loud whisper
Miss don't you do 1t. take blackberry cordial"
-Bost0n Budget
A Burglar Mechanic Mrs. Brlmmer-I don't SOC
when man has q good trade why he should prefer
to be a burglar.
MIR. B-Wb0 are you talking aboutl
Mrs B-That Tan who caught breaking into
q store last nj hit. He's a machinist
Mr.. B-Wh0 told you that
Mrs BIho paper san aSs. that while he was at the
tho burglar made bolt for the door, BOSTON Budget
A teacher In Of our primary schools was In
structng class IN tao first ridIments Of geography
and speaking Of the poles abe saidi az wonder
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1887-04-20
TIY NOT IIEENSE.

The Prohibitionsts objected to the Crosby
bill on the ground that it was founded on the
principle of license, refusing to accept the
judicial Interpretation of license lie islaton, to
the effect that IL is IN the nature OF restriction,
not sanction. This objection cannot be raised
against the Vedder bill, which is emphatically
and essentially tax law. Nothing in the latter
can be construed as sanctiOning The liquor
traffic The tenderest ProhibitiOnist conscience
may indOrse this measure without qualm. Its
principles wholly removed from that of license.
1t proposes the levyIng of taxes upon a traffic
the evil effects OF which it recognizes 10 the
end that those who are directly accountable for
the mischief done shall DO held to as direct a
pecuniary responsibility. The tax on liquor
selling is in effect fine. and this fine is to be
applied to the maintenance of those criminal
and medical institutions the expense of which
is 80 largely increased by the prevalence of IN
temperance. Nothing at once more practical
and better calculated to check the present
traffic could indeed be contrived, and it is diii-
cult to see ROW the advocates Of temperance
reform in any shape can withhold their
approval and support from it.
With the removal of the license feature the
last ground of rational objection Is taken away.
AS the Vedder bill stands to-day it constitutes
fair challenge to the siLcerity of Prohibition
sentiment. II it Is rejected like the Crosby bill
but one conclusion will be possible. namely.
that even in case where Prohibition is
palpably aud VIGOROUSLY impossible. those who
demand that unattainable measure will rather
have free rum than fOrego an attempt the
failure of which Is not matter for conjecture,
but an absolute certainty. The taking of 30
irrational and perverse position would inevi-