The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1887-08-11
The Merry Side !

''Time-honored principle of Democracy"-de
: feat.
1t won't take Cleveland to veto Gen. Powell
claims.
l -
There is no use denying that the corn is roast
: ing ears, now.
D Powell has one redeeming quality, as we view
, 1t. He's red-headed.
Some men ought to have been born pigs-witl
nothing to do but grunt.
; Earthquakes again in the South. Who say,
Democracy is unshaken?
-
The best that can be said of Gen. Powell i,
that he's red-headed victim.
sx4
Mr.. Cleveland will 60 South this Fall. He
won't take any battle-nags with him.
Plating off new lots is good thing for any
town. 1t gets part of the dogfennel cut.
The Democracy are breathing hard in Ken.
lucky, and tightening their grip on Texas.
-
Gen. Powell has a military record (which en-.
titles him to join the woman's Relief Corps.
At the call of ''time" the Democratic party
comes up to the scratch"-but a little "grog-
gy."
The thermometer teaches a useful lesson
| keep climbing up, no matter how oppressive
the heat.
The preacher labors in vain this weather. The
weather itself is more suggestive to sinners than
| eloquence.
For beautiful blending of colors. at this sea-
son, the true artist wears red flannel shirt and
paper collar.
! The indications from Rowan County, Ken
lucky, are that there is great need there-need
| of more funerals.
Tom Powell took a western trip, right after
| the State Convention. he went to study the
| science of tornadoes.
Well, Tom Powell has right to travel ON an
other mans pass. He will travel on Tom Ew-
ings next November.
The most striking feature about Tom Poweu's
picture is that 1t makes him look like he was
doing something mean.
This is happy weather for the young man
he can catch dust enough on his upper lip to
make his mustache show.
-
Friends, we must fire the stubble in the old
political field this year, but we must keep our
fingers out of the flames.
We rejoice, Of course, with those of our friends
at a distance who are getting plenty of rain
but its a dry kind of sympathy.
80
The suffering public can scarcely realize that
the campaign will be long enough for the pub
lie spouter to get his second wind.
*s~
When the Scriptures say amen love darkness
rather than light, because their DEEDS are evil,
they must mean real estate agents.
The people should remember that Democracy
is a good deal like a counterft dollar-it Is sure
to go back ON you, if you deal in it.
-
Cleveland, exhibiting his civil service reform
ers, has about the same good luck as the man
who was exhibiting the docile mule.
Cleveland didn't how a man could be
wounded in the saddle. He would, II he had
ever appeared in front Of the enemy.
"What has become Of Old Sumps' Why, he is
placed as a stone in the pile of mistakes that
make up the Democratic sarcophagus.
The wife of Pat O'Boyle, London, Ohio. had
four babies in one day. The next time that
Doctor comes he'll meet Pat and a shotgun.
<.s
James Rooney got drunk, at Youngstown,
and took q nice nap on the Railroad. Wen
tell you how he enjoyed 1t after he wakes up.
The young man likes to run the horse. this
weather-because it makes the young man COM
fotabIe. 1t makes the cool wind blow through
his head.
Charles Burdge, sent up from Stark County,
was pardoned on the petition of all the jurors
who tried him. Now that he's out, the jurors
ought to be in.
They accuse "Gen." Powell OF trying to ride
on another mans thousand-mile ticket-but
never mind, his passage up the river in Novem-
Der will be free.
The Democracy want free trade-because
there's too much money in the Treasury. This
is the first case in which Democracy failed to
remedy that evil.
In Rowan County KY, there is red flag
floating from hilltop, "as sign of blood"
No use to put up the nag-the name of the
County is enough.
Mrs. Runski, of Frement, Ohio, hurried up the
breakfast fire with coal-oil-but the family
didn't eat bseakfast until after they had taken
a look at the remains
-
Woman, when you 60 to buy green apples out
of a wagon, don't ask the man If they're good
cooking-apples. Don't do 1t! He may have an
immortal soul to save!
-.
The President Is getting great many invita-
tions out, among the people, this year. They
want to make it pleasant for him during the
little time he is to remain in office.
80
Democrats love to joke about Joe Foraker's
small pants. That don't signify. There's more
meat and less brains in the Presidential Chair
now than this country ever saw before.
-
An old Indian chief has sent to Washington
a necklace made of human fingers. They used
to make them of bears claws. Who says the
Indian has not advanced in civilization
John Keely, of Cincinnati, knocked John
Quigley down and ate his nose of. There's the
place of Missionary. What a fine Sunday
lunch John could have on a nice fat preacher!
The Courier-Journal boasts of the "New
South" because four Democratic children were
born in one family, at one time, in Memphis.
But are they of as rich color as under the "Old
South?"
The water main fund in the District of Colum.
bia is short twelve thousand dollars, through
Democratic Reform. The shortage of water
will be rough on the citizens-but 1t won't hurt |
Congress.
A number of Iowa Democrats talk of organ
izng a Grover Cleveland and j eff Davis wing
of the G. A. r. Their uniforms VIII doubtless |
be gray, and their aims the return of the Rebel
battle-hags.
The "prominent men" are beginning TO give |
away their own parties, to reporters from the |