The Savannah tribune. [volume] (Savannah [Ga.]) 1876-1960, 1887-11-12
A BELL PUNCH.
Deacon SharpIey's Lawn Mower. and
the Way il was Used


From the Boston Transcript
IL tell you what, said suburban
friend of the listener, as the street car
conductor came around bearing par
ticularly big and imposing bell punch,
"there is deacon in our church that
ought to be made to carry one of those
things when he makes his collections, if
ever anybody ought to be made to wear
one.
''Why What has the deacon done2"
''I'll tell you the WHOLE story, and
when I've done | want to know whether
if it had happened to VA it wouldn't
have Destroy Eyodr confda nce in some
body. You See, l hive next door to
Deacon Shapley, and my yaM is sepa-
rated from his Just by light picket
fence. / was whacking away at the grass
on my little lawn the other night with
grass hook; was just finishing the job,
and wondering whether | should ever be
rich enough to swell out with a lawn
mower, when the deacon came out and
leaned over the fence. See here, said
he, you're getting quite a lawn here,
and so am ]. We n'teither Of us have
quite enough business for a lawn mower,
but together we might have Say we go
snucks on one2' ] told him that /
thought it was good idea, and would
go in with him ON a machine He said
he would manage the purchase, and
would tell me how much half the cost
was. So let him go on and bay the
Ia II mower, and he brought receipt
ed bill for $l2 so in his own name. /
gave him the &c. 25, and left the machine
and the receipt in his hands
''About two weeks after that-Id seen
the deacon showing the lawn mower
around in his yard in great style in the
meantime-I thought my grass had got
up enough to warrant cutting, and went
over to the deacon's to get the machine.
The deacon was out, they said, but the
lawn mower was down at<Mr Smiths.
l thought it was littlG queer that the
deacon had lent our machine, but went
down to Mr. Saiths and got it. L
thought they looked little cross when
/ took it, but took it just the same and
moved my lawn. Next night the dea-
con came and got it again and moved
away while in his back yard A few
days after that thought it was about
time to NOW once more, and went over
to the deacon's after the machine. No
machine anywhere around. / asked at
the back door
"'Where's the lawn mower2
"'Mr. Smith came and got it little
while ago, said the deacon's daughter
"Mr. SMITH What business had he
with our machine? [ didn't ask, but l
trotted down to Smiths. I found Smith
very complacently oiling the lawn
mower, and apparently getting it ready
for action.
"'Well, said I, q came over after that
lawn mower; but as you seem to be get
ting ready to use it, 1 suppose can
wait
"'Hum, said he, Il guess the deacon
and / keep it pretty busy.
$50 it seems, said /, kind Of sareasti-
cally.
'f'Well, we have got our moneys
worth out Of it, you know, says he.
"That struck me as a mighty queer
remark, and / couldn't help saying, i
should think you'd want to get one
yourself.
90 Well says he looking up a little
surprised, = own half Of this one.
"'You--you own half Of this?' says I,
astonished.
"Why, certainly said he; Deacon
Sharpley and | bought this lawn mower
together.
Il tell you that took me completely
down. The deacon had completely
PLAYED rs of, one against the other, and
has got me to pay for one half the
machine, and Smith the other, calculat-
ing to get the use Of it TO NOV ali his
own grass for nothing. If he had been
as cautious as he was sharp, and Kept
the machine in his own barn, or else in
stead on going after ithimself, suppose
De might have kept agoing that way.
But since we've found it out, Smith and
I get along first rate, but the deacon
has to hire an ITishnan to NOV his
grass with a scytae
"And that's the reason why / think
the deacon ought to carry a bell punch
when he takes up a collection. Don't
you think it would be a good schemel"