The Grenada gazette., 1887-09-24

Anere Is . probably well-known little
humorous account Of an Irishman who
went to the theater for the first tim.
just ~ the curtain descended ON tho
nrst act an engine in the basement on.
pioaed. and he was blown through the
roof, coming down in the next strset
After coming to his senses, he asked:
AN what piece do yez play next"'
A Danish officer is pictured to us
making observations in regard to the
deviation of rifle bullets. Ono dav
when walking on the ramparts At
Duppel, he saw a Prussian sharn.
shooter taking aim at him. While
the soldier placed himself against
tree, in order to take a steadier
a'm' the officer raised his glass to
watch his movements. "This is all
right said he; 1.-THE musket Is Just on
line with my breast-we shall see."
The trigger was pulled, and the Danish
officer quietly wrote: at a distance of
about five hundred yards, the devia-
tion OF a ball from a rifled musket is
about one meter"
A certain American sea- captain was a
perfect philosopher. and no amount of
ill-luck ever depressed his faith or
good spirits. Coming into the harbor
once with an empty ship after three
years cruise. he was boarded by 4
townsman, who inquired: "Wal,
cap'n. how many barrelsp Had q good
voyage" No." responded the skip
per; Il hain't got barrel Of lie
aboard. But" said he. rubbing his
horny palms with satisfaction, while
his hard features relaxed into smile,
I've had a mighty good SAIL"
Another imperturbablc character
was the hero Of the following little in
cident A gentleman was travelling
in a smoking compartment on the
Midland railway, and at certain sta
ton a German entered the carriage
and took his seat opposite him. When
the train had started. the engineer,
noticing the others Havana, inquired
if he could oblige him with cigar.
The Englishman, astonished at the rc-
quest, reluctantly pulled out his case,
and saw with disgust the other select
the best he could find, and take a
match from his pocket and light it.
After taking few puffs with evident
enjoyment, the German. beaming at
his companion through his spectacles
affably continued: Il would not haf
droubled you, but I had q match in
mein boggit. and l did not know What
to do nit it"
Blondin Is said to havo given the
following caution to a nervous man
whom he was carrying on his back
across the Niagara Falls: II must re-
quest you to sit quiet. Or l shall have
to put you down."
The wife of Partisan, returning
home, rang at her own door. Nobody
came, so she rang again. Still nobody
appeared. Finally, at louder and
longer ring. the man servant conclud-
ed to show himself. '.Pray, are you
deaf2' said the lady. Il beg pardon,
madame said he TRANQUILITY. "but l
heard only the third ring"
That servants remarkable compos-
urc was quite equaled by y country
woman's of his employer. who en-
tered the house Of one of her lady
friends on her usual day for receiving
visitors. ''Uear me. what has hap.
pened? You look so pleased" said the
lady of the house. my DEAR" replied
her visitor. Il am quite proud Of my
SELF Only fancy. while driving here,
my coachman. clumsy fellow, did not
obs erve q gentleman who was crossing
the street; the horses ran against him.
knocked him over, and sent him roll
ing in the mud. Wcll. would you be-
licve it? WASN'T frightened bit"
A Spaniard can prove not whit be-
hind other Europeans in acting with
GOODNESS when it so pleases
him. A traveller. Oh reaching Span
ish country town. went to shoemaker,
as ono of his boots needed repair. He
found the honest tradesman reclining
in tho shade in front of his cottage and
"Could you mend mo this
boot at oncep" he inquired. The
worthy master looked at him. made no
reply. but called his wife. "How
much money have we left?" he said.
The wife pulled out an old leather
purse and counted the money.
Twelve pesetas," ':rhat is enough
for to-day and to- morrow" observed
tho shoemaker; and added, lasiiy:
No. sir; l can not comply with your
wish"
Tho ladies, we should think. would
not recommend the cool behavior Of a
Danish bridegroom on his wedding day
to be extensively initiated. A we'd.
ding was arranged to take place at
little church in the north of Jutland.
The bride was there to the minute;
but the Indispensable bridegroom was
long in making his appearance. At