Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1887-01-22
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THE EAGLE.


civil service, not a reform Of the
revenue laws, nor OF the land sys-
TEN, nor ofthe financial policy of the
Government-but a reform, radical
and complete, Of our national es,
cu.cheon.
Mr.. j. Goldsborough Bruff, who, it
is said, has been in the employ of the
Government over sixty years, and
who has devoted much of his time
to tho study Of heraldry, has present.
ed a memorial to the Senate setting
forth that the present coat of-arms
Of the United States is a "baseless
fabric" of unprecedented irregu-
larities," aud arguing that our ma
tional dignity and reputation suffer
in the estimation of foreign Powers,
who carefully observe the great laws
Of heraldry, By reason Of the rude
and grotesque device which in our
deplorable ignorance in such things
we have designated a coat.of-arms.v
Mr.. Bruff, therefore, demands that
our heraldic insignia be changed or
discarded, and a new coat-of.arms
more in harmony with the eternal
principles OF heraldry be adopted.
Mr.. Bruffis not alone in this move
ment. That able evangel of reform,
the New York Tribune. is backing
him with zeal aud vlgor. According
to it, Mr.. Bruff's structures on our es-
cutcheon are ell-founded. /" Its
diverse side," says this oracle, lis
adorned with an exasperated eagle
apparently under the impression that
he has vastly too much to do.
In a flying position he is obliged
to support an immense shield, COM
pletely covering his breast and body,
a scroll, bundle of arrows and an
olive branch. His emaciated legs
protrude from behind the shield as if
fairly aching for rail fence to stand
on. His head is screwed around in
a painful effort to escape the entang-
ling scroll, and his tail feathers hang
from under the shield with a notice.
able disposition to drop out. The
position is one which no eagle was
ever obliged to assume before, and
if the proud bird failed to resent it
he would be unworthy his heritage"
Now all this may be true in the
eyes of Mr.. Bruff and the Tribune,
but somehow we have an impression
that the American eagle is we'll
enough as he is. That he isn't like
the eagle of Europe we are prepared
to admit with some degree of pleas
ure, however distateful such lack
of resemblance may be to his critics.
He may not know anything about
the effete laws of Old World herald
ry, but he has thus far managed to
do all that was required of him. He
has never proved unwilling or unable
to hold any quantity either of ar
rows or olive branches that the oc-
casion called for, and as our friend
in Little D0rrit said of another sort
of biped, "a eagle as is willing, and
a eagle as is able, and if that's not a
eagle where is eagle 2"
The men who found this bird and
allotted him his duties had some
ideas which they intended him to
represent that they did not derive
from European laws or anything else.
1t is not difficult to understand that
those who are dissatisfied with him
want an altogether different sort of
an eagle. For instance, should the
Tribune and its school of American
statesmen be allowed to devise new
coat of arms, we should doubtless
have something like this: An eagle,
recursant, a-straddle of rail (steel
tariff So per cent.), one end of which
rests on the STOPPING shoulder of a
Western farmer and the other on
that of an Eastern worklngman.
The shield should be of tin-plate
supported by plgiron Cupids, the
pinions of whose wings, plucked from
the different birds of the country,
should shape the words Vandalism
and Republicanism," while on the
chevron should be blazoned either
in pigeon English or Pennsylvania
Dutch the inscription, "We flap to-
gether." The dexter support should
be the Goddess of Liberty, with her
back hair clamped in the eagles
talons, while the sinister should be
the Goddess of Justice. whose ban.
dage, scale and other articles of APP
parel have been grabbed and strip
ped in the birds off claws. The crest
should consist of a pair of striped
stockings, adossei duty 70 per cent?
the last of the Star-eyed Goddess.
Under one wing of the eagle should
be clasped an Illinois sucker, and
under the other a Georgia cracker,
while in its beak should rest sugar
coated capsule representing the
Earth. Radiating above should be
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