St. Paul daily globe., 1887-03-06

and nowhere, piled IN napleSS CONFUSION.
In this mass of disorder there lies a metal
scarf-pin. whose head is fashioned in the
image of a roach-a queer, grotesque. pop
eyed, whimsical, Japanese roach. 1t was
this that caught the insects eye.
whats that?" he remarked in surprise,
for he fancied in his egotiSm that he knew
how easy it is even for a roach to initiate
its SuperiorS.
The scarf-pin made no reply. After wait
ing reasonable time for response the
little sight-seer again observed, this time in
louder tone of voice:
Hello. you, there! Who are you?'
Becoming impatient and not a little veXed
at the evident want of manners in his
strange contemporary. the roach with
alacrity retraced his steps, and in a few
minutes he had mounted to the shelf where
the Scarf-pin lay.
WELL" declared the insect with trace
of pomp0usness becoming his long resi-
dence in the office, 81 never saw you before.
Been here long,
No" responded the scarf-pin in hard,
metallic voice, which was part OF nature.
mot very long"
''Well," replied the roach, who was at
heart disposed to be a gentleman, Il am
glad to see you. anyway, although you
weren't very cordial at hrSt.
No" answered the scarf-pin. apologeti-
cally. Il can't move my neck very easily.
1t is rather stiff, to tell the truth"
mo WONDER" continued the roach, hos
pitably, ''you have been exposed to the
draft. Come with me to my room under
the inkstand. 1t is very cosy there"
Cant" replied the pin stiff1y. 81 can't
move without being lifted"
.'Rheumatsm?"
No, l don't suffer any pain. I think it
is an organic trouble"
''Ah!' unused the roach, knowingly, as if
it understood what "organic" meant. He
had learned that silence is often taken for
wisdom, had this little initiative rogue.
We'll, you needn't be afraid of him." con-
tinued the insect. pointing with one of his
feelers to the editor. He doesn't amount to
anything. You ought to know him once.
Why do you know he is a thief? He doesn't
half earn his money. / heard the pro-
prietor say so to the editor-in-chief just the
other day. He cuts out strips of paper and
then writes comments on them, which he
thinks are funny. The proof reader and
know better. If you ever want to know
what an editor really amounts to, just ask
the proof reader. He knows"
GU read his work, do you?" inquired
| the pin, With visible respect.
Not 1" returned the roach. with an all
of ennui, mingled with superior wisdom.
mo, sir. We newspaper fellows never
read what is printed in the papers. We
leave that for the public. Then again he
uses the shears until they ache, and the
paste brush is worn out with overwork
The only thing about the desk that has an
easy time is the pen. He seldom uses that
Tho liac will bo i,,l,
stand, and we often talk about him. He
agrees with me exactly"
Il have no doubt you are right" replied
the pin, politely.
But where did you come from?"
"a girl brought me and gave me to him. ,
''Ah." returned the roach, refectively
twas she pretty?"
NO" responded the pin. 'but," hi
added. with enthusiasm, ''she was more
than that. She was beautiful. So ht
thought. and so l thought. too
You see l had chance to see great dea
of her very closely. He wore me on his
scarf, and when her face was bended ovel
his and her eyes looked into his, can tel
you l nearly lost my own heart Yes,
continued the pin after short pause. Il
am an expert on feminine beauty. | have
[ may say without egotism, been greatly
admired by the ladies. l have often beer
on exhibition in jewelers. windows, and
have seen my share of the world. If haC
been made with two legs and arms insteaC
of this long golden pin, / feel sure [ wOul(
have been very great swell. Indeed,
know l would"
No doubt of it." observed the roach
'IIow long ago was this?"
about year."
tsNoo T rannlIoof II NON, roDJ;ad tl,o ~,
sect He used TO neglect his work at tha
time and wrote great deal of what HI
called poetry, but it wasn't. My friend
the pen. said at the time it was such mawk
ish stuff it often used to make him sick, ant
one day he came nearly being discharged
for having poem about Phillis-who
ever she WaS-Set UP instead of a jOk
about the ice cream man. He also bough
some handsome clothes and tall hat, an(
he used to shave every day and wear gloves
The paper weight told me one day when
was out he saw him look at himself in
pocket mirror and smile as though he wa
the most contented man-with himself-il
the world. ''Well, how did it end?"
Badly" replied the pin, with a sigh
''badly. One day she returned him hi
presents and went to Europe. l though
for a time he would go crazy from grief.
II noticed it. too" answered the roach
"He used to sit down at the desk and writ
while the tears stood in his eyes. and tn
editor says he did the best work he ever did
l have often noticed" continued the insect
wisely, THAT when the editor laughs as h
writes the readers cry, but wheu he erie
the public laughs. Funny, isn't it?"
Yes" responded the pin, absent
mindedly. for very few pins, like very fe,
editors, have a sense of humor, ''but
think it must be broken off now.
haven't been worn for three months, and
r believe she was married to foreigner, s
the lamp ON his dressing-case told me, an
it read the letter, think. Anyway, fet
| sorry for him.
$50 do l." replied the roach impulsively
''But he'll get over it. If he could onl
lose his temper with her and quit grieving
then he is safe. Well. must be goin
now. Good day. Much obliged to you fo
| your information"
( Then with a reckless haste the insee
started across the editors paper for the inh
( stand.
''Confound those bugs" remarked tn
editor, crustily. as he picked up the pape
weight and placed it heavily on the insect
Every time l see one of them l All re
/ minded of that hideous pin, which by tn
way, l must throw away"
Il think" observed the Scarf-pin to hin
self, with little shudder. as the editor IT
sumed his work, ''that he is in fair wa
o. to recover"
Senator Tom BOwen's Big Bluff.
Chicago Herald.
II sat in game of poker once at Lea,
vile with Senator Tom Bowen. of Califo
nia," said Mexico mine speculator. ''ar
l don't care to play with him again We
: socn. DR.. Powell, local millionaire, WI
also nlavinp and was hY far fha Smalle