davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24
Fortune is Tickle.

Say tho cavaliers, but we HAYS observed
that she usually attends genuine merit. She
has been the faithful handmald of Hostel
ter's Stomach Bitters from an early epoch
IN It's career. That is because the American
and other enlightened people have perceived
that 1t really eradicates fever and ague,
kidney and bladder complaints, dyspepsia,
constipation, debility and nervous troubles.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24
WHITE caps--the nurses. Puck.

IT was lucky thing for Noah Webster
that he didn't have chance to employ
caligraph operator when he got up his spell
ing book. -Nerchaat TraVe e.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

There is no such person as Santa
Clans, is there?" asked small Hartford
G RI of her mother. "Some folks say there
is not, '" was the reply swell, l don't care.
don't Ike folks who say there isn't any
Santa Claus They never give little girls
any nice presents. "--harUord Post
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

The petrified body Of man was found
In well i'll Iowa the other d,y He might
be called a well preserved man, anyhow
Texas SittinQg.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

Ht1I UOIIh plU IuI0I III IFS UTtINV low.
Be wise in time Check the little cough,
cure the little chill, dispell the little pain,
ere the little aiment becomes the strong,
mconquerable giant of disease. DR. Pierce's
Golden Medical Discovery, taken in time, is
Q remedy for these ills.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24
Nor marks its flow.
CHRISTMAS, OLD AND NEW.

The December of the First Century The
First Christmas Of tho Puritans-Christ-
mas of Eary Times Contrasted with
That of To-day, and the Great Lessons
They Teach.
Written for This Panerl
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

THE new umbrella has q match box in the
han lie. Many nice par sois are mere match
making devices themselves -DaiWth Pure
0TGpker.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

THE plea of the financially embarrassed
swain is Love me little, love me short -
Merchant rduel r.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

A NUMBER OF compostors have been mr.
rested in Vienna for being Anarchists They
were probably driven to itby editorials ON
pohtisA ECONOMY. - Merchant TrIOsssr.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

A CASE OF fine liquor mas been known to
deveop mo case OF dei4riun jams
WdSiaytoa l',atc.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

IT is the ambition of all Prussians to make
their marks -BOStoA Post
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

The waves of old oceln are by no mems
ready to sleep when tuey put their white
caps on.-N o. Picduulie.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

Nor all men are bru es, but an old topper
reminds us Of rye-noceros Duluth Pdra
grdpher.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

A BOY "out at the elbows was asked the
cause, and replied: II laughed in my
sleeves until burst them"
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

A DELICATE De aware man refuses to have
his mother-ili-law live wi h him because
she doesn't agree with him.-Hdrpers
Baz1r
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

THE cleansing, antiseptic and healin
qualities of DR.. Sage's Catarrh Remedy al
uneQualled
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

A little seed lay in the earter's path;
A little shoot lwed In the strong winds wrath;
little shrub grew. by its roots held fast
Then u stouttree braved all the winters blast.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

ONE dosen't like to be stared in the face,
except, possibly, when it is victory that
does it Hap rs BazR.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

WHEN Is n U. s. bond ike tavern? Whel
it is called in. Tezds Sptiu2S.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

MONEY is so tight now that some people
haven't even any loose change.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

A wE1L-wIsHER is one who invests in OF
territory. -It1GS SUtist9S.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

MANS temper is one of the few thing
which improve by disuse. -Bostom Transcript
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

The nearest of kin-the napkin It's our
bosom friend --Ezcha,,ge
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

IN school they have to keep up the IN
terest of the scholars in order to pay the
principal -Ueread It TrdveieF.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

@SR, every word you speak is lie.
"R ght you are, my pretty m4sa "-FGCgsHde
Bldker
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

Motto for Santa Claus Know all men
by these presents. "-4AaeOA 1sisyrCph
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

"ALL want" said the opera-singer, "is
notes for notes; large notes for high notes !"
HGrDeYiy Bdzdr
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24

A little chin shivcred the hour, OF hight;
a little pain came and began to grow,
Yhen cOnsumptiO laid all his brave strength
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24
4 q l.:ly.s

A. N. K.-C. 1855.
WHEN WRITING TO ADVERTISERS PG.EASn:
state that you tho Advertisement in fhsp
paper.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-12-24
INFORMATION a Il ;.;t, IA sIssIs$s

EF9EE BY return mail. Full Description
EEEH = AoeGy's New Tailor System of Dress
ri HA I'm Cutting. MOODY & CO., Cincinnati. o.
EhnkEc in Ohio, Cheap, Good. Send for description
HiiAi3 and price. Ii. n. BANCROFT, jefferson, G
ESEs ~ silk and Satin Neckties. Agents. snap
HE Box anu outfit pc. TIE CO., Augusta, Me
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

COMMENTING on the course of certain
newspapers in raising great hullabaloo
about the impeachment of Governor LUCE,
the Jackson Patriot, q staunch democratic
sheet, dscourses most sensibly as follows:
"The talk about impeaching Gov. LUCE be-
cause he neglected to hand in his resignation
as member of the board of agriculture is
petty and unworthy. Nobody wants him
impeached. Having been duly elected, all
fair-minded persons, even if it were possible,
would frown down any attempt to displace
the new governor on technicality. At least
one prominent alleged democratic newspaper
in this state seems to think that practical
politics consist of kicking up laundering
racket about some trifing bug-s-boo that
finds no Judgment in the minds of men of
judgment and capacity. Battles are not won
that way, and those who indulge in that sort
of thing injure any cause which is 30 unfor-
tunate as TO be championed by them"
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

As was expected, the house, on Thursday
last, passed resolution to submit the pro-
hibitory amendment to vote of the people
at the spring election. The vote stood sew
enty-four ayes and twenty-one nays. Every
republican but one-Bettinger of Wayne
voted in favor of the measure. The fusion
lists held a caucus and resolved to vote solidly
against the measure, but there were ten of
them who declined to abide by the caucus
decision. They were CADY and STUART of
Wayne, BENTLEY of st. Joseph, BALDWIN of
Otsego, HooBLER of Saginaw, ROBINSON of
Montcalm, WILSON of Claire, McKIE of Der
rien, PARDEE of Ionia, and PRESTON of Ing
ham. There is every probability that the
resolution will pass the senate and that the
people will have an opportunity TO decide at
the polls whether they want prohibition OF
not. By all means, LET the senate move
promptly in this matter.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

THE Michigan legislature il wrestling with
bill to compel parties who desire to enter
into welded bliss for life or until the inter-
ference of a divorce court, to procure a
license for that purpose. If all ministers of
the gospel and justices of the peace would
make prompt return of the marriages solem-
nized by them, the present statute would be
good enough; but they don't do it and, IA
consequence, the record of marriages is very
incomplete. Perhaps the better way to cure
this evil is to adopt the license system, but
it will be rough on bashful SWANS TO go
before the county clerk and tell all about it
and, besides, it will be ruinous to the business
of ministers and magistrates who live near
the state line. Runaway marriages from
other states will be played out.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

THBBE is no state in the Union that is in
better financial condition than Michigan.
She is practically out of debt, owing but
$3.50, 900, "A balance on the war loan that is
not due until 1890. To pay this, there is an
equal amount of United States bonds in the
sinking fund. Were It not for the fact that
the parties holding these obligations against
the state will not accept payment before it is
due, this indebtedness would long since have
been paid. The foregoing statement is out
side of the trust fund debt, which is com
posed of funds and amounts SGT apart for
educational purposes, and which must remain
q perpetual debt, on which the state, as
trustee of it's educational institutions, must
pay interest for all time to come. The total
amount of these funds is 81 1913 Cpl, some of
which draws interest at five per cent, some
at six per cent and the balance at seven per
cent
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

has been made TO the courts TO secure his
seat The democrats claim that there was
no legal vacancy in the Office, although they
nominated and voted for man for the posi-
ten. II was only when their candidate was
defeated that they discovered that u vacancy
did not exist Ostensibly, the democrats
have seventy-six votes on joint ballot and
the republicans seventy-four but, as there
are thirteen contested seats, eight in the
house and five in the senate the situation IL
liable to be materially changed before vote
is taken for senator. The democrats have
nominated Judge TURPIE AZ their candidate
for senator, and the friends of MCDONALD,
his principal competitor, are very much dis
gruntled at the result. II is said that several
of them will vote for HARRIsoS, the ropubli-
can candidate, but this is hardly probable.
Judging from the we'll understood capacity
of the democratic party for making disas-
trous plumbers at critical peIiods-to put its
foot in its mouth, as it were--it would seem
AZ though the chances were in favor Of the
election of General HARRIsoN.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

SENATOR MONROE, in addition to being
president pro tenn, position, by the way,
for which the NoRrHKRsEn suggested his
name months ago, is also chairman Of the
committees on banking and the State Nor
on rules. Representative CRoss is chairman
of the committee on insurance and men,
Der of the committees on state affairs, and
the asylum for deaf and dumb. Representa-
tive SIMPSON is chairman of the library com
mittee and n member of the committees on
agriculture, and roads and bridges. Van
Buren's Legislators have been honored, and
they will honor the positions to which they
have been appointed.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

TIB interstate commerce bill has passed
both houses and will, undoubtedly, become
the law of the land. This is question on
which there has been decided division of
sentiment, not only in congress, but among
people who are conversant with railroad
matters and management. 1t is claimed on
the one hand that il will result in great ben
eft to the people, especially to the agricul-
turalists of the west while, on the other hand,
it is claimed with equal vigor, that no class
of people will be benefited and that the result
of the law will be disastrous to the interests
of the very parties in whose behalf the bill
was framed. Time will tell which is correct.
The law may be imperfect and need revision
or amendment, but il is, we believe, step in
the right direction.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19
Much Ado about Nothing.

Among all the foolish things that have
been perpetrated or attempted ill the name
of the democratic party, VIC remember
nothing more utterly stupid and ridiculous
than the talk of impeaching Governor LUCE
because he did not tender to Governor ALGER
his resignation "a a member of the state
board of agriculture, before his Inauguration.
1t is said that Mr.. LUcE was approached by
leading democrat-no less parsonage than
HENRY CHAMBERLAIN, the great demo-green-
back sage of Three Oaks-with a proposition
to allow ELECTROMAGNETIC dictate GER
tain appointments, as the price of the silence
of the great democratic party of Michigan in
this matter, and that Governor LUCE indig-
nantly refused the modest suggestion. We
could scarcely believe that Mr.. CHAMBERLAIN.
although, AS a politician, he has given utter.
ance to many foolish words, had got so far
into his dotage as to be guilty of this superb
piece of folly that is laid to his charge nor
that he would be willing to stand sponsor for
an attempted impeachment of the governor ON
filed his petition for such impeachment, and
has thus won the unenviable distinction of
being the greatest DooBERRY in the demo
cratic party.
The editorial columns of the state organ of
the late fusion party have been loaded with
trash concerning this matter for the past
week, but that is no evidence that anybody
will be idiotic enough to prepare and submit
to the Legislature articles of impeachment
that must rest on such himsy foundation.
Should the leaders of the democratic party be
silly enough to attempt any such scheme. it
will prove to be political boomerang, thrown
by unskiled hands, and will work injury
only to the party in whose behalf the sup
posed weapon will be hurled.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19
Cni BOnO0

The following figures are taken from tho
report of the Michigan commissioner Of
labor, bearing date January 1st, 1887. They
constitute a brief but convincing temperance
discourse:
The number of prisoners received at the
at the Detroit House of Correction during
the year 1885 was 1886. or these, only 391
claimed to be temperate, while 2 245 admitted
themselves to be incorporate. The number
of convcts received at the state prison at
Jackson during the same year was 295. OF
this number, eighty were temperate, fifty
five were moderate drinkers, while lG0 were
incorporate. 1,6l7 of those sentenced to the
Detroit House Of Correction were sent from
the Detroit police court and were, of course,
convicted of minor offenses and misdemean-
ors.
The enormous number of the inmates of
this institution who we're confessedly intem-
perate-eighty five per cent-shows that the
use of intoxicating liquors is directly respon-
sible for very much of the crime of this class
Were it not for strong drink, the criminal
business of our police courts would be but
the merest fraction of what it now is. Sta
tsitics from the common jais of the country
would show state of affairs similar to the
records of the police courts.
The class of criminals sentenced to the
jackson prison comprises only those who
have been convicted of felonies, az minor
offenses are not punishable by confinement
in that institution. OF this class, about
fifty-five per cent were addicted to the use of
intoxicating liquors to excess.
These official figures may not prove that
whiskey and kindred drinks are responsible
for nine tenths of the crime committed, but
they bear the impress of official authority
and their truth cannot be gainsad, and they
are sufficiently startling to cause intelligent
men and women to ponder whether or not it
is well to submit TO the drink-evil day longer
than they are compelled TO.
1t is folly To claim that there ia no connec-
| ton between these figures and the commits
sion of crime, or that a large proportion of
| the crime committed was not directly or
| indirectly caused by strong drink. The
average of Incorporate criminals committed
| to the two institutions spoken of was seventy
per cent. When we remember that there il
but comparatively small proportion of our
population that can be called Incorporate,
the fact that seventy per cent of our crimi-
nails come from those who may he 40 classed
is sufficient to convince any sane mind that
the use of Intoxicating liquor as a beverage
is responsible for more than a moiety of all
the crime committed in the country. Can
anyone show how or where their use causes
any corresponding benefit az a compensation
| for this terrible evil? There is none.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

The Detroit Free Press, replying to a
statement made by the NoBTHEBNER that
"The Free Press takes the lead in opposing
submission" says the NonrHERNER is in err
TOR, and that "The Free Press does not
oppose submission" Thanks, esteemed
contemporary, thanks; the NoRrHERSEB is
glad to be set right in this matter; and yet it
cannot reconcile this statement with the
many other utterances of the Free Press on
this same question. If it is not opposed to
submission, the Free Press will, no doubt.
advise its readers to vote in favor of the
amendment, provided it shall be submitted.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

'TII English government recently refused
to allow an American military company to
land on the sacred soil of the British empire.
Great Britain must retain vivid recollection
of 1776 aud 1912, but she was unnecessarily
frightened this time. There was no intent
on the part of these men TO capture the
proud empire upon whose shores the sun
never sets. They were simply on pleasure
excursion, and the only destruction intended
was the destruction of English "grub," and
for this they were ready to render guid pro
quo in good American money.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19
The Verdict Unanimous.

w. ID. Suit, Druggist, Bippus, Ind. testi.
fes: II can recommend Electric Bitters az
the very best remedy. Every bottle sold has
given relief in every case. One man took
six bottles and was cured Of rheumatism of
10 years. standing" Abraham Hare, drug
gist, Bellvile, Ohio, affirms: "rhe best sell
ing medicine l have ever handled in my 20
years experience, is Electric Bitters." Thou
sands of others have added their testimony.
40 that the verdict is unanimous that Electric
Bitters do cure all diseases If the Liver. Kid
neys or Blood. Only half dollar a bottle at
Covert Il Bartram's drug store.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

BoMs disgrsosful scenes we're enacted in
the New Jersey Legislature, the responsibility
for which seems to be about evenly divided
between the two parties. The democrats
Numbered a. usual, and the republicans &C.
cured the organization. Two or three labor
members hold the balance of power, and on
their votes depends the election OF either a
republican or a democrat for United States
senator. They voted with the republicans
on the organization, but it is not at all GER
tain that they will do 30 on the senatorial
question. The muddle in that state is near
enough like that in Indiana to be twin
brother to it.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

having lots of fun over the location of the
federal court. The former supposed he had
it fastened at Bay City, but the irrepressible
TIM, fguratively speaking, knocked his eye
out and had East Saginaw inserted in the
bill. The rival cities are making faces and
glowering at each other. The one who final
ly comes out ahead in the fight will be a
great man--in the estimation of his constit-
uents
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

The substitute for the EDmUSD's bill re-
Gently passed by the house of representatives,
was the most radical measure yet proposed for
the suppression of polygamy. Had the SEN
ate done likewise, the people would hope
that they had seen the beginning of the end
of the remaining "twin relic', but that body
saw ct to reject the measure. No legisla-
ton can DO too radical, if it will only remove
this foul blot from the body pohtic. If it is
not accomplished by peaceful means, it will,
some day, cost the Nation blood and treasure
to rid itself of this moral cancer.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

CONNECTICUT republicans have very prop
erly nominated General HAwLRY to be his
own successor in the United States senate.
Senator HAwLEY is q valuable man and it
would have been poor policy to substi-
tute any new man in his place. His we'll
known and recognized ability, together with
his large Legislative experience mark him as
one of the leading men in our National halls
of legislation.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

SOME of the fusion legislators Of Michigan
distinguished themselves by voting for Henry
A. koBINsoN, the late defeated republican
candidate for congress in the LIST district as
their candidate for senator. That's right,
gentlemen. if you shall ever get into the
habit of selecting your candidates from
among the republicans, you will improve the
morale and standing OF your party.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

ILLINOIS republicans have nominated Hon.
CHARLES Ii. FABwELL az successor to General
LoaANs seat in the senate. 1t is not expect
ed that he can fill the place so lately occu-
pied by the deceased warrior and statesman;
there are very few men in the nation who
could do that Mr.. FARwTLL, however, is
not wholly inexperienced in Legislative mat
tors, having served in the forty-second,
forty-third and forty-fourth congresses. He
is an able man and thoroughbred repub-
iican.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

THI democrats nominated GEoRaE l..
YAPL. as their candidate for senator. Of
course he wasn't elected; met with his usual
luck-badly scooped. But then, his wife has
got baby, that is some consolationi and it
is the seventh one she has had. The YApLE
boom is on the increase.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

WHERE is the Chicago fooi-killer9 girl
who was introduced to Anarchist SPIES dur
ing his trial is about to marry the condemned
criminal. The Indications ars that the above
mentioned f. k. could reap rich harvest in
the windy city.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

MR. HENRY GEORGE has succeeded in Sc
caring the sincere hostility of the Catholic
Church. Well, the people generally will not
feel bad about that. He merits not only the
hostility of catholics, but Of professionals as
well. He is not developing into first class
crank, as has been suggested; he is already
fully developed.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

ONLY one solitary vote was cast for De-
troit's doughty democratic dictator, Dos M.
DICKINSON, in the democratic senatorial eau
Gus. But then Dos was not candidate, you
know. No empty honors on his plate.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

IT hasn't been in response to the petitions
of party prohibitionists that the house Of
representatives passed the resolution for sub
mission. They are not in the petitioning
business. In fact, it appears very much as
though that party-especially its LEADER
regret the probability of submission. They
fear il will hurt their nnrtn.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1887-01-19

EX-SENATOR MCDONALD and his friends
are all wrought up over the nomination of
Judge TURPIH instead of the ex-senator him
self as the democratic candidate for the U.
S. senate. They not only consider it base
ingrattude, but look upon it as a case of
extreme TURpIR-tude.