Signal-Copiahan. (Hazlehurst, Copiah County, Miss.) 1885-1888, 1887-09-29
FULL OF FUN.

NO, Nellie. q slirrup Is not what
they use to beat eggs with. but to ride
horseback. Dansviiic Breesc.
Let the weather alonc II you want
It to lot you alone. Tho hottest man
In the town Ia tho one who goes about
with fan asking every body II 1t Is hot
enough, and appearing to have charge
OF tho weather. M o. Pcdynne.
1T has boon asked why n city Is
called q .,she." The answer seems m
easy one. There Is always moro or
less hustle about city. Besides city
has outskirts. and he could not I'm.
der any circumstances have skirts OF
any kind.
The following notice was seen la'i
summer ns,y.n colorcd mans meiop
patch down IN Kentucky:
"Miliions for sale,
both water and mush.'
Harper Bd=ar.
lyon asked me 10 bring you little
pin money" said young husband to
his wife. Eyes dear" said tho lady
sxpcctantly. "Well. 10 save You the
fatigue Of going out in this hot weather
Ihave brought you some pins instead"
NJ !. Sun
"A stern old orthodox clergyman.
when passing q fashionable church on
which new spirc was being erected,
was asked how much higher he thought
it was going to be. ':Not much high.
cr" he said; "they don't own very far
in that direclion"-N T. Ledger
mamma. where do the cows get
tle milk?" asked Willie. looking up
from tho foaming pan of milk which hc
had been intcn,ly regarding. "Where
do you get your tcars7" was the an.
swcr. After thoughtful silence he
again broke out: "Mamma, do the
cows have to bs spanked3"- Ipestcrn
AgriculturisL
-"'Pcars to me-" said Uncle Pete,
as hc leaned his no, against the corn.
crib and extracted . pebble from his
shoe; "'pcars TO mo like dar' was
some kind Of misdccomposishum In oil
dis talk about babies cuttin' tccf Dc
way Tsc cum to look ut 1t. hits do tecf
cutlin' tho baby. Lcas'wisc, dats dc
way hit looks In dc case OF cullud
chiren. ."-E1changc.
Tho editor of the London Post
wears lilac kid gloves through overy
dinner to which hc is invited. He Is
rather tony. but for genuine ihrce-ply,
cightecn.carat style, The English people
are referred 10 the Dakota editor. who
wears q six-shootcr. % bowie knife and
no necktio through ovory dinner TO
which he Is s-inyitcd--ns well rs 20 some
to which no is not invited. Norris
toWn Herald.
Tho editor Of the Carson Lssriat
rcmarkA In asrikih -Jditorial para.
graph: IF Tod Bunker don't keep
his sow and shoats from under our
Office he Is going to lose some pork."
In the midst Of profoShd spcculations
on European affairs sud the probable
hereafter Of the heathen, how rcfr esh-
ing IL such breezy, commonplace.
homelike editorial uiterancc rs this
burlington Free Presa
Keeping Himself Before the Public.
NO" said young man TO the
thea,er ticket-seller. 81 don't want an
end seat; want on6 In the middle Of
the row. usually 60 out two or three
times during tho performance. and
half the pleasure I got at the thcatcr
Is in the sensation make In passing
In and out. yon know. II y fellow had
an end scat. hc might go ont and come
in dozen times and nobody would
notice him. So no-cnd seat for me-"
~ J. Ledger.
mo doubt YOU have heard" said
The car conductor. 'of the man who
always gets into acar with ten-dol-
lar bill and. rs 1t could not be changed
fol- his fare. rode scot free. A certain
aged creature played tho game on me
for five consecutive mornings. In or
der to get even with him / filed y
small tin pail with ninc dollars and
ninety-fvc cents In pennies and five.
cent pieces. Thoncxt time he offered
me the ten-dollaf bill j dumped the
contents of the pail into his hat.
We're square now.' / said to him.
Quito so, was the reply. But when l
turned the ton dollars into the Office. 1t
was pronounced counterfeit, and ], for
my smartncss, was that much out Of
pocket. t."-Paiiadelphia Nens