The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-09-21
BRIGHT BITS.

WHAT is more lovely than peaceful grand
m 'therf' asks an exchange. Her granddaugh-
ter. If this is not the right answer, we give it
up.-O5tdhG World.
WE have heard of swell dinners with twelve
kinds OF wine, bat are of the opinion that one
kind of wine would swell us so that we wouldn t
care about any dnner.-LotceH Citizen.
SUNDAY ScHooL TEACHER What is it, Tommy,
that stingeth like an adder?
Pupil trecently caught in neighbor's pear
tree)-The end of a trunk strap. -BurIing ton
Free Press.
AGENT--0n what grounds do you claim pen
sion,
Applicant Grandfather lost his health in the
war OF 1872, and left an impaired constitution to
the family-Neic Haren NetrS
He was lecturing against polygamy and eulo-
giving woman. what is there in the wide
world. said he, 80 pure and noble and lovable
as woman" And just then voice in the
audience replied Two women" -Paragraph
Il SEE by the paper" said Scruggs, ''at least
by headline, that woman snot at Coney
Well" said Mugs 'I'll venture to say, from
what know of the sex's craftsmanship, that
she didn't hit it. Philadelphia Times.
Mas. MINKs-Does your boy show any particu-
lar bent YETI
Mrs. Bnks-Yes, indeed. He'll be a noted
scientist some day
DO you really think sou
80, there's no doubt of it at all He always
uses the biggest words he knows ''-On.ahd
World.
An English clergyman declares that clergy.
man sore throat is due to the fact that speak
ing from an elevation TO listeners below irritates
and presses the vocal organs. An impression
existed IN some quarters that it was due to the
Iact that the clergyman wished a few months
vacation to take trip to Europe.-Norristotr
Herald.
AaATEUR PHOTOGRAPHER TO a friend)-You
know Dulnley, of course?
friend-Oh. yes; Intimately.
Amateur Photographer Showing him a pic
ture)-Well, what do you think of that for q
specimen OF amateur work?
Frlend-Fine, old boy fine! Er-who does it
epreseaty-Drcke's Magazine.
WHIT do you spose made those boys boiler
Go up thou bald mead to their unfortunate
elders in oIden times?r' asked Johnny of another
boy in his Sundayschool class
Il dunno, wes the response, unless they
wanted the old fellers to try the gallery them
selves for little while, and give the boys a
chance at the orchestra chairs. - WASHINGTON
Critic. lFs
Az Unucky Reading Notice. Excuse me,
Sir" said the business manager to the city edi-
tor, but you promised to print that puff of
Smithers dry goods store just as 1 wrote it,
NO, sir 1t wasn't published at ALL"
only?''
wrong side of the manuscript. y Washington
Critic.
CoLoRED CONFIDENCE Candidate-You live
out i'll the colored settlement in the outskirts of
town?
Negro Voter-Yes, sah
Candidate-Well, there is going to be a ward
meeting tonight, Jim, and want you to be on
hand with all your n9ighborS. Don't come
without them.
You kin jess bet dat all my Majors comes
along wild me or stays at home myself"
"How's that?'
EFF all my cuilud Majors comes wild me ter de
ward meetin', den I'll know dat my fonr domi-
necker hens and de rooster am safe Eff | was
ter go 70 dat er meeting and leaves Jess one ma.
Dor at home nebber see dem fowls no noah -
Have you no confidence in your own racer"
Conference en- a niggah when dar's chickens
in de coop and nobody Ia de yard wild a shotgun?
Why, kurnel, yer muss be a dreamin'. "-IecaS
SiftiRQs.