St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1887-11-06
CULTIvATING GOOD MANNERS
Phases of Character Singuiarly
Neglected by Many People.

London Queen.
The want of good manners-indeed,
of any manners at all has its root III
the way children are left almost entirely
to goyernesses and servants. You
cannot teach a child too soon
the refinement of manners, and for
this they must be for some part of
every day in the company of well bred
and well hammered people. 1t is OF no
use to suppose that good manners will
grow like mushrooms in a night. The
author of John Halifax writing upon
this subject, says of our neighbOrS
across the channel, that 1.-The little
people are almost always with the
big peOple. and are thus uncOnSciOuSly
brought into training by the good
manners of those about them, and learn
to be little ladies' and gentlemen almost
before they can speak" Self-cOntrol is
essential to good manners. How often
you find, if a person has infringed upon
the rules of courtesy, it is not that they
wish to be. rude but that their own
particular rose leaf has been erumpled
for the moment, and they are quite in
different as to how many of their neigh
bOrs they crumple i'll return. 70
GentIeness is too little cultivated in
our intercourse with each other. Bishop
Latimer said of his times, "There never
were in England so many gentlemen
and so little gentlenesS." This would
not be if it was inculcated
from earliest childhood that "cOur-
tesy is a Christian virtue, and
Christian charity the basis of all
good breeding A great cause
for the. brusqueness we find i'll this
world is from people having no real
ease of manner, and being compelled
and diSagreeable originality, which they
imagine hides their gaucherie, just as
an ill taught school boy will make a
blot to hide bit of wrong spelling.
Singularity almost always makes enc
mics, it is usually credited with affecta-
ton. Carlyle says, ''affectatiOn is often
singularity, but Singularity is not al
WAYS affectation." Greatness of mind
shows itself daily in behavior. Its
ways are ways of pleaSantneSS." | was
particularly struck by the observation
of lady, who, when some one said Il
hope this dull party does not bore you"
replied, Il do not know what it is to
feel bored"
To my mind that was the perfection
of good manners. Let us all remember
that example Is lar better tlan precept,
and let us cultivate for ourselves and
each other all that is graceful and good
and refined in manner and conversation.
Some writers say, 1.-The manners of
the ill-mannered are never so OBJ
vious, uubearable and eXasperating
as they are TO their own
nearest Kindred" but this ought
not to be. If we can be pleasant and
courteous and well-mannered anywhere
it should be in our homes, where the
comfort of so many is SO dependent
upon US. Ioften think of the remarks
servants must make (wh0 hear family
chickering's on the company man.
ners'' which can be as
sumed so readily. In what is
probably called 1.-The Dark Ages" i'll the
days of Homer. Peleus is made to eX-
claim, Sweet manners win respect"
and yet how rare is beautiful behavior
and how little cultivated. 1t would be
well for us if we oftener employed our
time in drawing parallels in our minds
between our own private character and
that of other persons, whether of our
own or of remote age, and strive to
cultivate those graces of the heart and
that gentleness of spirit from which
good manners proceed.