Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1887-03-03
BAD TEMPERED MEN.
A Restaurant Dissertation on the Adyan
tages of Being Cross and Crusty.

tages of Being Cross and Crusty.
'Have you ever noticed" asked the
old citizen, ''what a good time the bad
tempered people have in this worldP
How they get their own way about
every thing, and how every one flies to
do their bidding? Now, look at
that man over there complacently eat
ing his venison steak. He came in ten
minutes after did, and yet here am
still waiting for my lunch. Why did
he get served first? Well not because
he's good customer; he's not half SO
regular as I am; not because he tips
largely, for know he never gives a
cent, while I am guilty of bribery and
corruption to the extent of two or
three quarters week, but just simply
because he has the worst temper in
Chicago and would raise Cain
if he were kept waiting.
Now, /, on the con-
trary, have the misfortune to be mild
tempered. and, consequently, am con-
tinually imposed on, here and every
where else. The walters all know that
the worst they have to expect from me
is a little mild growing, and therefore
l am frequently left, as am to-day, to
regale myself upon a pale-blue table,
napkia, knife and fork, and cruet,
while the bad-tempered fellows steaks
and chops flash by like lightning. I
don't like it, but what can I dop I
couldn't fly into rage to save my
life. I would if I could, with the
greatest pleasure-I don't disapprove
RACES on principle at all-but 1 can't.
It's physical impossibility, you know.
was born without the faculty. Oh,
the bad-tempered man has the best Of
it by long way, and especially in the
bosom of his family. Instead of being
worried about frozen pipes and inn
pertinent servants and smoking
chimneys, as we unfortunate ami
able men are, every thing that goes
wrong is carefully kept from him for
fear he should be cross The children
are invariably we'll behaved when
papa is home because they stand in
wholesome awe of summary proceed
ings on his part; his wife never bothers
him for money any more than she can
possibly help, because she knows it
doesn't agree with his temper; his
mother-in-law carefully avoids the
house, because poor dear Fanny's hus-
band is so irritable, you know and he
is spared that terrible nuisance of be-
ing obliged to listen, over and over
again to every little unpleasant thing
which happens; as for instance, how
and asked the Smiths and didn't ask
u.s. because his wife knows that
if annoyed on the subject he
is quite capable of peremptori-
ly bidding her drop Mrs. Jones'
acquaintance. His meals are always
on the table punctually, because his
servants are aware of the fact that Mr..
-- is awful 'pertic'lar,' and his meat
is never cooked to death or too rare,
because the cook has no desire to be
dismissed on the spot.
Every likely he js a pleasant, agree.
able fellow when nothing has occurred
to vex him. and consequently his
friends do their best to keep him in an
equable frame of mind. They never
persistently contradict him. because
-, you know, has such devil of a
temper and they tacitly agree to let
him have his own way about most
things Tradesmen don't cheat him,
knowing that he won't put up with it;
his clerks do their best and work twice
as hard as other peoples clerks be-
cause they want to keep peace in the
office.
"And bad-tempered women, I've OBJ
served, are never imposed upon as
their more 'amiable' sisters are. Their
servants and children obey them, their
husbands humor them, their friends
pet them. They are never sighted. or
made use Of or pushed on one side,
because they won't stand those things,
and no one wants to make them
cross Indeed, "a bad temper is not
such bad thing, in my opinion"
its pretty expensive thing some
times,' remarked the man across the
table. eth csc ilI-tempered fellows are
usually attacked by remorse a fter a fit
of unreasonableness and feel obliged
to make it up to their victims. 1 dare
say YOU have heard of Phil Armour's
fits of ill-temper. They say that every
time he gets into Il rage with one OF
his clerks he makes it up to him after
ward by a present of a suit of clothes.
I've heard his temper costs him, on an
average hundred suits a year, and
know lots of men who find their tenn
pers expensive luxuries."
'.Ah, here comes my stew at last, "