The Milan exchange. (Milan, Gibson County, Tenn.) 1874-1978, 1887-06-04


reached, when, horror of horrors! a
sound as of bursting shell came from
the room across the corridor! The
mystery was solved. That was what
had gone off before when Mrs. Win
chester thought she had lost the top OF
her head. The widows Indignation
was in exact proportion to her physical
suffering, and her chronic disgust of
snoring and snorers. Explosion num-
Der one was followed by series of
modified but regular snorts, which
lasted several minutes, and then came
another shattering report which seemed
to Mrs. Winchester's over-wrought i'm
agination to have knocked out both
transoms and smashed things general
ly. This climax was followed by few
moments of silence, broken at last by
the sound of heavy breathing, pro-
tracted groans and occasional nasal
earthquakes.
Mrs. Winchester felt sure that il
would be impossible to live till morn.
ing under such conditions. The rest
in the music were all delusive, and
were invariable followed by fierce
crescendoes which were sure to split
when they reached their height, in
way which ought to have demolished
the orchestra.
And SO the night wore on. The
widow knew she never slept one wink.
At any rate the morning found her
much exhausted, and scarcely able to
sip the coffee which Nellie brought at
the usual hour. After breakfast Mrs.
Winchester had decided to lay the mat
ter before her hostess. The new
boarders room, or her own must be
changed.
"She is coming up by and by any
way" said Nellie smiling. you see,
| man, they had great surprise for We
last evening"
II had all the surprise l care for, -
the lady responded YEARLY,
but, you see, man, this was a good
one," the girl persisted. They was
going to get you down to the cards,
and thin the door was going to pop
open, and a foine, handsome gintle-
man was going to walk in and sci
down"
"What-thdt one"
Mrs. Winchester pointed feebly
in the direction of the strangers
room.
"Yis," said Nellie, "the very one
Excuse me, nam, but he is an extra
foin man in appear nce, but he looked
a bit cut up-slsrisv- -EsAht65rning when l seer
him driving away"
He had gone then. Mrs. Winchcste,
nibbled her toast with renewed appe
tite.
HE isn't coming back, is he, Mel
lie?" the lady inquired, fearful that he
rejoicing might not, after all, have
proper foundation.
why, 'spose so, nam, the Cir re
piled, in evident establishment. at
most likely the gintleman will com
back as long as yourself is here"
A lurid and awful light broke in up
on the widow at this juncture.
Nellie" said she, in a tone of pur
histrionic agony, "What is that man
name?"
"Why, it's Mr. Browne, mam-yoa
gintleman. Pom me sowl l though
you'd guessed long ago."
"Oh! how could have been so mis-
taken in the character of this man?'
:. the widow moaned, after having feebl
waved her loquacious companion fror
the room. What narrow escape
| have hadr' And now Mrs. Wincheste
hastily sought her writing material
and proceeded to unite the ante-nuptis
, knot. She wrote:
mr.. BRowNE-Dedr Sir: Please considC
our engagement at an end. would not run u
risk OF woundng your feelings by stating II
reason OF this sudden change OF sentiment, e,
J cept for the fear that you might consid,
[ me capricious and unjust. The fact is,
nave ulsCOVcTcu buat you arc IN Lne naO
Of" here Mrs. Wnchester's pen WI
| poised for fully five minutes How cou
r she write this vulgar word-"snoring"-
was down at last-"and life for me under sue
1 circumstances would be an intolerabe and 1
. supportable burden. Yours hastily
2 MRS G. NJ. WINCHESTER"
t The widows bell rang, and the lett,
: was Immediately rushed in the mai
e bag, and within five minutes was on i
b way to the villain who snored.
| Half an hour later Nellie entered I'll
t invalid's room with an excuse from hi
! mistress.
: She'll be up directly, man," 81
t said, land she told me to give you tn
G letter that the gintleman left for We. ~
r The supersensitive widow coul
4 hardly bring herself to touch the doc
$ ment with the tips of her dainty finger
:. 1t was impossible not to be contain
mated by even the most superficial r
e lations with person who snored. b
$ as the lady often remarked of hersel
r she I0dS Just, and so the brief note WI