Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1887-03-16
RESPECTABLE NIPS.
SOLEMN FACED FELLOWS WHO ASK
FOR SPIRIrUS fRUMeNri."
The Complaint Of a Druggist Who Cannot
Avoid Selling Alcoholic Drinks to High
Toned Gothamite.-Carrying Around =
Physicians Prescription.

| Avoid Selling Alcoholic Drinks to High
! Toned Gothamit.--Carrying Around =
/ Physicians Prescription.
What will il cost me To advertise nv busi-
ness for SALE" asked an uptown druggist re-
Gently. Il wouldn't dare do it, though. for
would have procession in here next day like
a crowd Of voters going to the ballot box on
election day; but seriously, there are times
when I'm mad enough 10 do it. What l
object 10 is keeping har under false pre-
tcnces. Yet | have to, or should lose some
of my best customers. And that is inst
where the trouble is. When a stranger comes
IN and ruhs his hand on his stomach and puts
on an agonizing face, and feebly mutters
that he'd like a little brandy and ginger for
the collie, why, | can tell him we don't sell it.
know he's a hypocrite, who don't care to
walk up to "A har like a man and take his
drink; he knows | .lie when I tell him don't
sell :. il that way. But when nv highly
respectable customer who buys and whose
family buys all their drugs and fancy articles
of me comes in and asks for little tonic and
plain sol | can't lose his hundreds II
dollars OF .Siness every year by refusing
Now, the rich man who lives around the
corner on 'e avenue He comes in every
day about O'Clock, and all he says is, Little
sirup, Ed That means Holland gin with a
little soda, and a thumping glassful of gin.
too. 1t don't make any difference whether
there are ladies in or not. and SO | have in
structed Ed whenever he comes in. to whisk
perfumery around so that the smell of gin
won't pervade.n
Then the druggist pointed to large bottle
on an upper shelf marked aqua FORTS. That's
trick, he said, that was driven to. Any
druggist would think that was very queer
looking aqua FORTS, and so it is That bottle
contains nv very hest whisky. There are
three or four men-good fellows, splendid
customers-who got into the habit of coming
in, going behind the counter and helping
themselves to whisky, and to my best Bour-
hon. Sometimes they paid, sometimes they
didn't SO | told Ed to fill the aqua forts
bottle with the best and put the second grad.
in the other bottle. and now these men come
in, help themselves, smack their lips and
swear that l have the finest whisky in New
York 1 don't smile. but want to when
they say that
WANT "sPIRITUs FRUMENTL"
Il hate to have these scholarly fellows ask |
for their nips They come in with solemn !
faces, but with an eager eye, and say, Let |
me have some spiritus frumenti.' l had |
just as soon hear a man blurt right out, Give |
me some Bourbon whisky or when they |
suggest spiritus vini Gallici,' that provokes
me. I'd rather they'd say French brandy"
Here the druggist heaved a sigh, and then |
added: They expect we're going TO keep .
general intelligence Office; get mad if We
don't know where Brown and Jones live: ex-
pect us to keep postoffice: get offended if |
We don't keep beer, make other folks offended
il we do, and then swear because we can
make barrel Of lime water for ten cents and
sell it for ten cents couple Of ounces, and
think our profit Outrageous. l know a drug
gist who has gone d the business because
be couldn't stand it, and the last straw was
rather rough on him. He's a deacon and
prominent m smber of his church One day
he stood by the soda fountain, talking with
his pastor. One of his best customers, an old
man, whose trade was good for $500 or $500,
perhaps more, every year. came in. Said he,
L want some whisky and little calisaya
bark, and he said it right out before the
minister. My friend suffered and hemmod
aud hawed for it was a bad give away to the
minister, and at last he said: We don't sell
whisky except for medicinal purposes The
TuStomer asked him when he had shut down
m it, and thought my friend was joking. aud
sinked at the minister, whom he didn't
,now, and then said. Come, le quick want
o catch the next car Ny friend was ia
old sweat, but said, We'll. seeing as you are
IN Old man and don't feel well, you shall have
t. But the minister WAS no fool He siw
through it all. Anyway, my friend has sold
nut"
Couldn't You protect yourselves by selling
'nly on physicians prescription" the drug
,ist was asked. The idea seemed to amuss
lin. Why" he said. some of my customers
AIRY such prescriptions around with them
or emergencies, if they happen to be down
own or over in Brooklyn. where I'm told the
lruggists pretend to be very rict."-New
York Sun.