Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1887-11-30
PIN IND POINI.

A LITTLE Burlington boy gave, % the
definition OF cupidity, slove-icknesA"
Huntington Free Press.
The man who wrote 20, solitude,
where are thy charms?" was q business
mar who didn't advertise. -Teras Sitt-
ings.
A YOUNG nan wants to join an arctic
expedition, because he is ambitious to
move in the highest circles Teras
Siftings.
FATHER latter finishing the bottle)-
JEFF, l wish my throat was o mile long.
Intelligent child-Papa, I'd rather "a
the bottle . mile long.
THERE seems to be a sort of cross be-
tween culture and hay fever in . good
many Eastern pulpits where they speak
Of the Bible a. the weird of Gawd."
NEVER stoop to carrying on q noe
turnal courtship on the front piazza,
especially if the street lamp in front OF
the house happens to be lighted. Carl
Pretzel.
A LITTLE boy in East Nashville heard
his sister say that Adam was the first
man, and when he was asked who the
first woman was, replied: adams
mother"
How FOOLISH it is to make fun of the
homemade hustle. There is not q girl
who makes her own hustle but is backed
by some OF the most influential papers
of the times.
AN agricultural writer says: "Wo-
men have handled chickens and bees
with profit" This may be good way of
handling chickens, but bees should be
handled with gloves.
Mrs. FoGG-Mrs. Brown called to-
day. What good company she is! You
can't imagine what u good time we had.
Fogg-I suppose not; but whom did
you say You were talking about?-Bos-
ton Transcript
"PApA," she said, entering the old
mans room, George is in the parIor,
and have broken the dreadful news
to him that you have failed" what
did he say? ?" "He wants to know what
you paid on the dollar. -New York
Sun.
"MY DEAR" said the elegant Mr..
Smoothemdown to his wife, "why this
unprecedented delay in the preparation
Of the matutinal refreshment?" "If
you mean why breakfast amt ready,
it's because you were too lazy to get up
and split the wood"
"YoUNG man." said the minister, inn
pressively, II can see you as you sat at
the gaming-table last night, with a deep
red flush on your face" Excuse me,
but you're wrong about that deep red
flush. Bill Jenkins had it in his hand"
-Washington Critic
"THAT man seems to have an antipa-
thy to cleanliness, remarked the High
School girl to her mother as o dirty
tramp passed up the street. II don't
know about that" replied the old lady,
"but l think he hates like everything to
wash himself. "-Pittsburgh Chronicle.
Down in Florida when a man feels
that he is being imposed upon, he gen.
orally takes measures to do away with
tho nuisance. A man named Cook on
the Indian River, became so exasper-
ated owe the continued drumming on
q piano, that he started out with a shot
gun and killed the piano player, Hoyt
by name. -Peck's San.
"AH!" he exclaimed, as he
found her sitting in the cleaning,
"you seem to be profoundly mediate
ing" ayes, Charley" said the young
beauty, II was thinking" Contrast
ing, I presume, the golden present
with the beautiful beyond?" "No; I
was thinking what if q later bug should
crawl up my back. "-NeUman hide
pendent
An inquisitive American journalist
while visiting a newspaper Office 10 Lon
don asked the proprietor whom he re-
garded 81 his best editorial writer.
"An old fellow named Mason" the pro-
prietor replied. Il suppose. you value
him on account of his scholarly style
and depth of discussion" "Oh, I don't
know about that, but YOU see his edito-
rails all turn a column about three
inches and a alf."-ArkansaU Trau-
eler.