Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1887-05-26
4 Bloody Battle.

Mark Twain, in writing recently of the
active part taken by him in the late war,
says:
was in the civil war two weeks. In
that brief time l rose from private to sec
ond lieutenant. The monumental feature
of the campaign was the one battle which
my command foughS-it was the summer
of 'G1. If do say it, it was the bloodiest
battle ever fought in human history;
there in nothing approaching 1t for dis
truction of human life in the field, if you
take in consideration the forces engaged,
and the proportion of death to sur
vival.
And yet you do not even know the
name of that battle. Neither do I. 1t
had name, but / have forgotten it. 1t
is no use to keep private information
which you can't show off. Now look at
the way history does. It takes the battle
of Bocnville, fought near by, about the
date of our slaughter, and shouts its
looss over it, and yet never mentions ours;
doesn't even call it an ''affair;" doesn't
call it anything at all; never heard of
it.
Whereas, what are the facts? Why,
these: In the battle of Bo0nville there
we're 1900 men engaged on the Union
side, and about as many on the other
supposed to be. The casualties, all told,
were two men killed; and not all of those
were killed outright, but only half of
them, for the other man died in the hos
pital next day. I know that because his
uncle was second cousin to my grandfath-
er. who spoke three languages and was
perfectly honorable and upright, though
he had warts all over him, and used to
but never mind about that--the facts are
Just as 1 say and I can prove it, Two
raeD killed in that battle of BoonYille;
that's the whole result. All the others
got away-on both sides.
Row then, in our battle there were ff-
teen men engaged on our slde-al brlga-
der generals but me and was second
lieutenant. On the other side there was
one man. He was a stranger. We killed
him. 1t was night, and we thought he
was an army of observation; he looked
like an army of observation-in fact he
looked bigger than an army of observa-
ton would in the daytime; and some of
us believed he was trying to surround us,
and some thought he was going to try to
turn our position, and SO we shot him.
Poor fellow he pro5ly wasn't an army of
observation after all, but that wasn't our
u
that dim light. It was a sorrowful cir
cumstance, but he took the chances of
war, and he drew the wrong card, he ov
erestimated his fighting strength and suf-
fered the likely result; but he fell as the
brave should fall-with his face to the foe
and feet to the feld-so we buried him
with the honors of war and took all his
things.
So began and ended the only battle in
the history of the world where the oppos-
ing force was utterly exterminated, swept
from the face of the earth-to the last
man. And yet, you don't know the name
of that man. Now, then, for moment.
Suppose had continued in the war, and
gone on as I began, and extermlnated the
opposing force every time-every two
weeks-where would your war have been?
Why, you see yourself, the conflict would
have been too one-sided. There was but
one honorable course for nae to pursue,
and 7 pursued it. l withdrew to private
life, and gave the Union cause a chance.
There. now you have the whole thing in
a nutshell; it is not my presence IN the
civil war that determined that tremen
dous contest-it was my retirement from
it that brought the crash. 1t left the Con
federate side too weak. And yet, when l
stop and think, l cannot regret my cause.
No, when I looked abroad over this hap
ply land, with its wounds healed and its
enmities forgotten; this reunited sister
hood of majestic states: this freest Of free
commonwealth the sun in his course
shines upon, could not wish otherwise.
No,when l look about me and comtem-
plate these sublime results, I feel deep
down in my heart, that l acted for the
best when I took my shoulder out from
uuder the Confederacy and let it come
down.
MAIDENS BAND TOGETHER