The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1887-12-03
AMONG THE TESTERS.

Keeps Still-The moonlight whisky
Observation-Disclosures Chronicle-Tele-
graph.
In the bright lexicon OF the base ball
player home run in time saves the nine.
Puck.
Jay Gould has landed in England, but
Queen Victoria still retains controlling
interestin the throne Life.
A French scientist asserts that ''the nose
is losing its sense of SMELL" Well, we
knew it. but didn't want to be blowing it.
Record. -
When YOU read that millionaire works
harder than any OF his clerks, please to re-
member that he also gets more pay.-Phil-
adelphia Call.
Bismarck runs paper-mill and distil-
lery He also runs the German empire,
but the two former bring him the most
money Syracuse Herald.
Instead of sewing tailors now glue the
seams OF garments together. Weareis of
tailor-made clothes will now be more
stuck-up than ever. Boston Transcript
Miss Pittsburgh--Do you believe in
marriage, Miss Chicago? Miss Chicago
Why cert. How else could we ever have
any diyorces?-'Tid Bits.
First Young LADY, see that Mr. Buff
falo BlPs profits in London amounted to
10000. Second Young Lady-Yes, and
think, too, OF his position in society.
Bits.
"Marah, suppose we give this copy Of
Dante's Inferno away?' "Why, what
for?'' IL don't think either OF us will
have any curiosity to look at it now that
your father has come 10 live with us. -
Washington Critic.
A boy may disregard his mothers call,
but when his father speaks up energeti-
cally he is apt to remember the learned
female philosophers revised dictum: "a
prompt answer turneth away wrath. y
Boston Journal of Education.
Anarchist Schwab, shorn of his wealth
Of whskcrs, looks as gentle as lamb, and
the iierceness of his disposition is percepti-
bly, modified. The moral is plain. To re-
Chicago Tribune.
Honor the pumpkin vinel
Long may its tendrils twine
over the lnnd
Blessed be those who wear
Crisp haysecd In their hair
Glorious bandl
Minneapolis Tribune.
Angelina asks for definition OF volubil-
fly. Nolubility, Angelina dear, is the dis
tinguishing feature Of horse ear driver
when he is thirteen minutes behind sched-
ule time on his supper trip, and an over
loaded coal team breaks down in front OF
him on the rail. -Somerville Journal.
Madame Unexpectedly enters the lardor,
where she detects Baptiste, the iootman,
in the act OF drinking Chartrcuse liqueur.
Both stare at each other in open-mouthed
astonishment. At length madame broke
silence and said in tone of severity:
Greatly, Baptiste, am surprised" Bap.
tste lin tone Of exasperation)-And so
am |. Why, | thought madame had gone
outl-Ie Mosque dc Fer.
They strpllcd along through the wood together,
manly youth and a maiden fair,
Gathering leaves in the autumn weather,
Tinted with colon most rlch and mre.
lie siad. You are much like the autumn leaves.
With your checks of red and your hair OF gold.
Aud your heart the frost that that leaf receives
Erc Is hues arr sccn--ior your heart Is cold"
The maiden answered: IT may be 10,
You've know me long and perhaps know best;
But the irnzen lcnf soon thaWs. you know,
After q, gathered and properly pressed"
-liosion Courier.
The subject Of human greatness wa,
touched upon in 81. Paul Sunday-sChoo
class, and the teacher aptly illustrated by
reference TO the President. Then she
made the application. Now; children
great as the ,scsidcnt is, wise and all that
as much as he is loved and honorcd, thorI
T. one We should love and honor far above
the President Of this great country. DC
you know who II is?" The teacher pauset
solemnly for an answer. Aud she got it,
Not from one, or two, or three OF the class
but in concert, and instantancously every
little boy and girl shouted out, 'Alrs
Cleveland. Exchange.
ayes, sir" went on Prof Y. TO n gentle
man to whom he had recently been intro
duccd al have given some attention {,
the study Of human nature, and ! rarcl,
fail 70 read face correctly. Now, there i
q lady, he continued, pointing across th,
room, "the lines Of whose countcnancl
are ~ clear 10 me ~ type The chin show
firmness of disposition, amounting 20 oh
stinacy, the sharp, pointed nose Ncioui
temperament, the large mouth youbility
the eyes dryness oi soul, the "Won
dcriul professor, wonderful. you know
something Of the lady, thcn?' said Ga,
professor "Ios, little; she's my wife.
Epoch.
A little moihcrlcss girl Of five summers
who Was left In my care four year in New
Orleans was ono Sabbath morning bus
over icr dolls wardrobe, when ! ap
preached her by saying Lily, God b
not pleased while YOU play with your dol
today" She looked seriously into my fac
aud said: "Mrs. R., God has nothin,
20 do with me. Jesus takes care Of It'll
childrcn." A small boy, also In my care
was found one Sunday playing steam car
with his blocks, etc. II was in Maiden
prior 10 the advent Of horse cans. i mad
similar remark to the one above and hi
reply was in pure innocence: docs Go,
keep 'cm all up there 20 hisscli today2'