The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-11-27

this couple want to get married" The
Alderman leads them into one Of the COM
mittee rooms and ties th knot. Thus the
old City Hall is the scene OF all sorts of in
teresting events, from statecratt 10 mar
riages. AMOS j. CUMMINGS
H.
Women know how to pierce the armor or
their sisters when men are utterly at sea.
A few nights ago | went to see Irving S
Faust" The tickets cost 81 piece from
the muggy fist of an affable ticket specua-
tor, and they were precisely three
rows from the rear doors of the thea
tire. 1t was sufficiently discouraging
distance from the stage at best, but
the misery of it was increased thousand
fold by two exceedingly large and stout
young women who sat in front OF US, and
who wore the most preposterous abomlna-
tions in the way of theatre hats that 1T has
ever been my misfortune to see from the
rear. They were in the shape of poke bon
bets, and were literally and truly almost as
big as an average coal bod, and not dis
similar to it in shape. The crown
part of the bonnet was small, but the
scoop, u or forward section, was of amazing
size. The material was garnet velvet and
brown velvet respectively. As though the
| ground plan of these extraordinary struct-
ures was not sufficiently elaborate and
| brutal, each woman had affixed broad bow
on the back and top of the poke bonnet,
which would of itself have echpsed almost
every stage in Christendom. The ribbon
was at least inches wide, and anybody who
has everSseen bow made of 4-lnch ribbon
and spread over the widest possible area,
will understand the amount of space such
an arrangement covers. 1t seems incredible
that any woman with an atom of decency
will assume such a preposterous headgear
on going to a spectacular show like lrvlngs
Faust" AS the woman was very big and
hroad-shouldered, the effect was very much
increased. | sat partially behind one OF the
hats, and | no sooner dropped in my seat
than l saw that there was fusilade of pro
tests ripping toward the two monstrosltles
of millinery A man behind me said
shortly, and with voice that could be heard
six rows away:
II have looked forward to seeing this
performance for three weeks, and / have
paid big price for bad seats in an effort to
get a look at Mr. Irving. Those two hats
make it an utter impossibility for me to see
any part of the stage. It's an outrage, that's
what it is, and | have devilish good mind
to call the usher and insist upon the struc-
lures being removed"
"You are right, sir" chimed in little
man near him with painting voice, people
have no right to deprive others of their
privileges by wearing such outrageous head
gear. shall complain to the management
myself if something is not done"
The two big women looked at each other
and smiled in a superior and amused
fashion. They were not in the least embar-
raised and shook their big hats defiantly.
The row in the rear grew more and more
noisy and people began to look toward that
section of the house. | had resigned my
self absolutely to my fate. 1t was simply
an impossibility for me to see any portion
IL. g. 80 lNfN
hand corner near one of the boxes
| was wondering how long such condi-
ton of affairs would be tolerated in any
other city in the world except New York,
when there was a commOtion at the other
end of the row, and a lady and gentleman
entered. They sank into the two vacant
seats Immediately on my right, and ar
ranged their wraps comfortably. Then
they both glanced up and sank back in their
seats dismayed. The lady had a clear-cut,
handsome and clever-looking face, and was
dressed in the perfection of good form anf
fashion. She stared at her companion first
and then at me. had just about made up
my mind to take a nap of an hour or so,
before going out into the cold and cherries
world again, when glance at the bright,
belligerent eye of my neighbor took that
idea out of my head She sat perfectly erect
and continued to look from her escort to me.
"Why, that" she said icily, lis simply
dreadful, isn't it!n
''Ghastly," said her escort, whom, by the
way, | knew, and who nodded to me dis
mally and who presented me to his wife.
''Can you see anything at all, she asked
exctedlv, after giving me sharp little
nod.
Nothing, except vast and exceeding
array of velvet and ribbon"
Did you ever see anything SO grotesQue
in your life!" she asked, with an air of de-
lighted amusement, but in a voice that was
audible to everybody in the vicinity, and
doubly so to the two women who sat
directly in front of us. "They are really
rather respectable looking persons, are they
not? But then they haven't any escort, have
theyg l should think it must be exceedingly
notifying for women to have to advertise
the fact that they have got to an age where
it is simply impossible to get anybody to ac-
company them in public, because it's so
very significant, you know"
The fat cheeks of the two big women in
front of us grew redder and redder as my
neighbor sent shot after shot at them, and
moment later they began to whisper sig
nificantly together. The lady to whom |
had just been introduced had evidently
come to see the play, and she was going to
see it no matter what had to be done in the
promises, and she kept up her running fire
of sarcastic remarks with merciless rapidity
amid the Delighted tltterlng ana laughter OF
everybody around her. By degrees, the
position of the two rather stout and pudgy
women in front of us grew more and more
unbearable, until they finally grew
pronouncedly belligerent. AT this period
of the battle my beautiful neighbor
suddenly discovered that one of the fat
women in front of us had a magnificent head
of hair, and she wondered audibly why it
was covered up by such a shocking bonnet.
This last stroke was too much, and the fat
woman with a sheepish grin removed her
preposterous headgear and placed it in her
lap. The applause that greeted her, was so
and forced her companion to follow her ex-
ample Comfort and happiness prevailed
thereafter, and the rest of the evening was
passed in peace BLAKELY HALL.
HORSES SHOW THEIR HEELS.