Wessington Springs herald. (Wessington Springs, Aurora County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1891, 1887-07-15
FUN.

FUN.
An old soar-the first h,r
cent. 0oa
ALWAYS pushing things-uh.,,
rows. e''t
A HONEST opinion-the co,,.
verdict. Oas
The man who has poor on;r;,.
himself is in mighty uninterestina
pany when he is alone. oS'a
No MATTER how busy he Is ,
can always find time to do an ~
charity. if he has the will.
"THouGHis that BREATHE WRIT,
another mans wife, should be foll sA
by words that burn" when she ,s,,:
them. Ss''
WHEN we have man pointed o,4
us "who has no ambition" wo
view OF one man who doesn't want !
earth.
AN impecunious man designates a,
dollar bill as "a William" becauso1
not sufficiently familiar with it to al
"Bill. "-Te.ras Sittings.
"CuR'us bout me, Mac-1 can ~,
! bah de mos insignificant ting dat 4
happened since I wah two yeab !
F'rinstance-" II say, Pone, does
'mcmbah anything bout dat hal dali
yo' borr'd oh me las yeah?"
"Do YOU know what has bceoo,
that relative of yours who used to \
for me?" asked a gentleman Of Il
borer. "No, yer honor, but if vs7|
anxious to see him DILL write to n
and AK him to sind me his adrissr
The IonlSers Gazette says: 1T; \
the dissecting-room that the docto,
his opening engagements" Th,|
true, and it may be said of the ord
man that his opening engagements
behind the counter. C0urI
EDlToE-This poem of yours \
pretty good one, but doesn't seem
| contain the clements of success p
What would you suggest as an
provemcnt? Editor-I should adj
you to turn your attention to prosl
Ha1per's Bazar.
FIRST saleswoman-Of all the Al
| CANT, disagreeable people l every wal
on that woman is the worst. l vol
| who she is. Second saleswomd
Why, that's Mrs. Chip. She used
tend at the same counter with me
fore she was married.-Iid-Bits.
FIRST Omaha Dame-Are YOU
boarding? Second Omaha Dan
Yes, but it is a great trial; my roo
never half attended to. "It isn
mo; and the halls are dirty and
parlor always coated with dust, and
can hardly see through the windo
"Indeed!" "And nothing is ever co,
right; half the things are burnt and
other half nearly raw" "Well, |
clare! Why, you are almost as BAL
as if you kept house and had girl
Omaha World.
IT was in an experience meeting 4
African Methodist Church over in
ginia. A new convert had been ii
in his confession. He had told
brethren and the sisters all the sin
his life, and more too, with all tleI
gravations. He had confessed 10 |
crime known to the statutes, and q
sin known to the decalogue. Whe1
paused for breath, gasping at lis
wickedness, a brother in the Gal
shouted solemnly: "Put out datla1
"Whv for?" asked the pastor. 4
said the solemn brother, ode vIes
ner done return"
GETTING TOO PARTICULAR,
tell We, stranger, what it is. we almost
I fight
1t We're some trouble that we had at Iea
| t'Othcr night:
Things down thar air gittin' most tooH
slick fer us,
An less they change them mighty 81
there's goin' ter be Il fuss!
i. We met ard took our Ticker fore the barat
Gosses,
Then rode GROUND the sidewalk ter so.ts1
else our bosses;
We KEEP it up till midnight and the t0HA
mighty red,
When we lowed we'd strike the Grand
and kinder SO ter bed!
And there up in the room were hung
We're a sight
/ A sortcr new departure rs will cause t-
ter fight
Which rcnd like this I'll shoot ii t-s
, again occurs:
5 Guests, before they occupy the beds WI"
\ remove their spurs!"
-D0kOta Bell.
WHY UNCLE NOSE GOT RAJ
Rev. Whangdoodle Baxter It
met one of the male members
flock, and at once addressed ME-
"Why, Nose" he said, "h''
yuse gjttin';; yuse gittin' mlsN1,
corpulept in mighty fine order