The news and herald. (Winnsboro, S.C.) 1877-1900, 1887-12-06
| SEAeET1G.

III u 4 4.
M kISAGETI4E. l..S,s I,
WANTED MAMMA TO KNOW TT. :
Little Willie had had the subject OF
new brotIlerj or slste efane ntioised TO hin
t,s y pfotSaDilltysi Int he nearsflit Gre. on
said. :, ~ e'.'s
Willie, llero IL u little sister th
angels Drought you last night
LET sme aeel''S cried While lii +;
great glee. The, angels never had an,
parasois, did tlleypn ssas
Why, what 4 question. Why al
you say so?D s% !.
Cause, they let her get sun burnt
ones right red. Take keer, let ms by
Where are you. going2'
), Golng o,', u & TO tell mamma. She don'
- II WAS NOT 1N1RoDUCED. .-.-ssSome
glfls are too confounded smart to live /,
sald young lawyer, whose office is or
street, to his companion. a#S"
"Wbyp What's the matter nowp,
inquired the friend. IS, 7 S's 4
" ell, i was alta dance one night
Gnd i,:heard certain Congressman,s q
uaughter talking to another; girl, and
the other girl asked her to Introduce
me, because she didn't know ME. but
pad seen me so often she wanted to.O !,
And didn't she introduce youpn
:, nav, lie said, In dIsgusted tone.
''she looked at her, kind of funny. svon
know. add said: sWhere ignor.
ance Is blissi'tis folly to be wise' Now
what 10 you think OF thatp'' q ] r
THEIRS was click Of the latch kew
N the front door about 10. 80 q, IN. and
MI. JOB Shuttle stole softly upstairs.
HIS spouse had not yet begun to dream
dreams, but was awaiting him. alf
Seems to me you arc later than
usualn 80
. YES, a little, my dear,n said job,
'9 on see I was elected e. OF S. to-
night" -. ~.
: "k. Of S.2 What's thatpn i8s Il
why, Keeper Of the seal, of course. -
Indeed? And about how long be-
fore I'm to be elected keeper OF a seal.
skin sacque?' l1I.
A woman knows Just when to pour
on cold water. tE 4.
q & .
LETTER THAN A Dou.-."Aren't
you afraid Of tramps, living all alone as
you aro?" asked one Western woman
Of another. :,
mot in the least. 1 am fully pro.
tected.n
''Do you keep a dog?n
IN o., they might poison dog. r
keep a large woodpile In the yard Where
it. can be easily seen from the road !.
ahey never come any farther than the
front gate.''
MoTHER.-"I declare I dread tho
thought Of our boy John getting mar
E'riend--"Oh, that feeling Is only
natural. You will become reconciled
to his loss In time" 4I WA
ut isn't his loss SO much" i.
"What then?" a.'
why, don't You see, that WILL make
me mother-in-law, and mother-in.
laws are simply dreadful ,4w
MRS. GOLDLEAF, newly graduated
from q very humble sphere OF life, IS
fond OF using French word now and
then, and this she always does with
striking effect. AS, for instance, when
speaking of somo duty her maid servant
had left undone, she remarked In a light
and airy manner. ssPauline Is "a good
seivant--a very good servant-but |
must confess she is apt to be neglige.n
OBEYINGlNs9RUCTIoNs.-Old Lady
Ito grocer's boy)-Don'G you know,
boy, that it is worry rude to whistle when
flp1linu vifl, ~ lo1oS s't' ~ tE.t
Boy--That's what the boss told mo to
do, num-. iJ8srE RAM
Old Lady-,ToId you to whistle? /
Boy-Yes, IN. He said if we ever
sold you anything we'd have to whistle
for the money. n
ELoQUENCE, OF, MoDuLATIoN.- -
Omaha dame--So you are named after
your father? suppose, though, your
mamma has some pet name. for you,
q Little boy--No; she calls me Will
same as she does papa.
IVY hen she Is IN another room and
calls, GOn t see how you can tell which
one she means, You or your papa2'
'Oh, that's easy enough. She always
calls me kind o. coaxing, you know.h
"Aw ETHEL - remarked Charlie to
his, pretty cousin, 81 believe--aw-Ill
have the barbah---aw--trIm my Whisk.
ers this mawning-aw.
do, Charley" said his pretty
cousin.
s'And--aw- Ethel, how would yon
suggest that ! have them trimmedY''
Well" replied the pretty cousin,
after sufficient consideration, II think
they would look very sweet trimmed
with pink ribbon" @