South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1887-12-02
he Prominent Cities. :

IL n the ambition Of some men 20
figure in the role OF prominent citizen.
They have an Unsuitable craving to see
their names in print. They attend all
meetings in which cur more prominent
citizens take part, and nothing pIeases
them moro than to have their names
appear in the morning papers IN the
long list Of vice-presidents.
The prominent citizen signs requests
to q theatrical manager or star to
accept compliments y benefit. after
scrutinizing the list of names to make
sure that there Is . preponderance OF
prominent citizens like himself, though
1t has been remarked that he rarely
buys ticket.
1t is for the accommodation Of the
prominent citizen that chairs are
placed on the stage on public oc-
casions, and we have seen him swell up
with the consciousness of his own inn
portance as he marched PROUDLY to his
seat, looking rs though the whole
AFFAIR was arranged with the sole view
TO lifting him up for the admiration Of
the multitude of ordinary citizens
seated below, who had no prominence
to speak of.
If he maintains q digniiied COM
posure and discreetiy holds his tongue
he Is safe, but sometimes the prominent
citizen-the kind we are writing about,
OF course-is betrayed into the weak
ness of making a speech, and the shall
iowness OF his claims to ony consider
alton above his fellows becomes pain
fully evident, lead ng simple people to
inquire how he got to be prominent
citizen, anyhow. II is embarrassing to
have question of that sort put in
motion, and no prominent citizen who
feels Mt all insecure In his position
should ever do anything to arouse it.
There Is rarely procession without
carriage at the disposal of the promi-
nent citizen. 1t would be extremely
undignified for him to walk like COM
mon mortals; besides that, in crowd
he might be mistaken for one of the
most Insignificant in the procession,
and no suspicion of his greatness.
Seated in an open hack, with flaming
badge pinned on his coat, strangers on
the sidewalk might be led to inquire:
Who is that man?' and he is in hard
luck ii there isn't some one on hand to
reply: "That is Colonel Blank, one OF
our most prominent citizens"
No one enjoys being interviewed by
the newspaper reporter like the promi-
nent citizen we are describing. He is
ready to give his opinion on any and all
subjects, from fracture in the side
walk to break In the Cabinet. If
series of interviews. should appear In
newspaper headed, What our prom
nent citizens think of it," without his
name appearing it would make him
sick, and he would probably call upon
the editor demanding an explanation.
Instances have been known of his writ
ing out an interview with himself, un-
asked, and putting it in the reporters
hands.
1t is on an excursion to some other
city that the prominent citizen shines
in his greatest glory. To have his COM
ing announced in the papers; to be re.
ceived at the depot by delegation OF
prominent citizens, some of them as
transparent humbugs as himself; to lis
ten to speeches of welcome, and make
a speech himself. if some friend is kind
enough to write it for him; to be feast.
ed and treated to free drinks, and
taken around in q hack to see the
prisons, poor-houses, public libraries
and breweries, with lunch and
speeches at each stopping-place; to be
stared at by barefoot boys; to have the
band play "See, the Conquering Hero
Comes" to be introduced to people as
the man "who has given so much
prominence to his city," the introducer
not embarrassing himself or others by
entering into any details-all these are
what give the prominent citizen such
exquisite Joy. Then it is that he is in
his perfect element.-TeTds Strings.