Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1887-01-14
TlG Science Of Badness.
BILL EYE GIVES SOME HINTS FOR
RESTORING THE HAIR.

! Science Monthly tnat Oaluness ID
very largly on the increase, and
that by actual count fully 80 per
cent. of the men, even at concert
or tragedy, are more or less bald.
This number is largely increased,
it Is said, when the play gets more
dash and spirit in it, and the lead
ing lady throws aside all reserve.
"The Popular Science Monthly
says that by actual count there
were present at Trinity church,
Boston, recently, 243 men, of whom
II were actually bald and 46 with
strong indications of badness;
Kings chapel, Sc men, of whom
3S were actually and hOpeIessly
bald, and If on probation Hollis
Street theatre orchestra, Nlikado'
performance, G3 men-27 badly
bald and 10 who thought they
could still be bald or let it alone;
Boston theatre, Judic, l26 men, of
whom 81 were actually bald and
43 apprentices.
"This writer also says that bald
ness is most plentiful in New York
and Boston. Next Philadelphia
and Wa shington, after which comes
Chicago and the western Cities
Can YOU tell me the cause of bald
ness alld your theory as to its
wonder 'ful prevalence | hope you
will p ardon me for writing you,
but | have learned casually that
You sometimes dabbled IN science.
also in badness. would be glad
to know if you have succeeded in
finding an gthing to help your bald
ness, as | am still young and IN.
married. Life is still before me,
and | want TO go to some one who
will tell me frankly whether there
IS still hope tor me or not
Badness is liable to break ont in
the most unlo Oked for localities,
but think it is generally inherit
ed. inherited mine, but | have
added to it a good deal.
You may not think you have in
berited your bal dness, and yet II
You 60 back sew EN- or eight genera
tions and exhunle your ancestors,
you will find tha tn ey are, in most
cases, totally bald.
have tried SO vera preparations
in my lifetime, all of which were
good for badness an d assisted 1t
very much. Th ese remedies ioI
the hairless are d eemeCl to resemble
each other in two particulars
namely: they wore all expensive
and all sticky. Some smelled OF
fensively when irst applied, while
others were mo o successful attel
awhile. For Sc veIal years ! dress
ed very plainly, Elisha, using TN
balance of my income on the slt'
of my former hair.
AS result of this, my DosoH
alternately hove with anticipation
or fell with dIsap point nent, wnil'
my bangs remained Il ubung an'
my hat smeled like volcano
eruption.
Various peop le came to me wlt'
recipes for woo'ng the hair out o
my glossy intel ectual rink. AmonI
them there ca ne to me a gehtie
man from Ell rIgland name Il mac
rOsuc, who cl aimed to hav' Oee'
royal taxideri mist for nine years
after which he had actC u a
chiropOdist G Extraordinary for seV
eraI years, re moving unicorns rOu
the great an / small. He said hil
he could q ow waving crop o
tresses On my bleak and barrhr
brow fc II five pounds.
He low has the five pounds and
I still retain my broad sweep oi
brow.
cannot tell how you can en-
po wer your tall sleek forehead II
rank, wind tossed hair, but cal
tell you how you can save $500.
TAX e your hair invigorator money
and b uy town lot IN growing
town that supports its home pape
and advertises and goes ahead
and y OH will find in twenty year
that you will be we'll fixed, and
man who is well fixed don't cur
mucl whether he has any hair @
rot
T,;e seen men with long, ricl
wav = hair, which fell in glorlou
sho' yer of dandruff on the cola
! Of their overcoats, who were JUS
} as unhappy as you or I, Elisha
Hair alone cannot bring happiness
| once knew a man who was yer
successful, indeed, and was fnall
) made postmaster OF his town. an
! he had whiskers that he had
button inside his coat to keep the
from brushing other peoples ey'
5 ont and he had hair to sell, an
$ vet when there came change
administration, and a new pres
} dent who hadn't an alma mater
lay his jaws to came along III
hairy man was almost the first
fall.
A wealth of hair is a good thin
but the head was not made so''
, asa hot bed for the prop agatloh
hair. Badness is one of the pen
ties of civilization, Elisha. Is
barians are never bald. Peol
II .ioon I'm straw piles aud