davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25
Horses Shod with Gold.

In the year 1855 a storekeeper named
Donald Cameron, carrying ON business
in what was known as the Woodshed,
Victoria, was elected first member of
parliament for the Ovens district, and
he had the honor-unique in the history
ofthe colony-of being driven in triumph
from the Woodshed into Beechworth in
a gig tandem team, the leading horse of
which was shod with gold. Just before
the election an eccentric individual,
known as Tinker Brown, who had made
a lot of money on the diggings, suddenly
purchased circus, with tents, horses
and wagons complete, and coming into
Beechworth with the company, he offer
ed to drive the newly elected member
and supply golden horseshoes for the oc-
casion. The woodshed bosses, who
were greatly elated over the result of the
election, warmly took up Browns idea,
and they resolved, in addition, TO present
their member with diamond scarf pin.
The horseshoes were made by working
jeweler named Tofeld and weighed
nine ounces each. The team was driven
from Woodshed to Beechworth and back
as far as La Serena Hill On removing
the shoes of the leader, a piebald circus
horse, they We're found to have lost a
total of one and three-quarter ounces.
Before Tinker Brown died he willed
them to a married daughter keeping
public house at Wagga Wagga. They
were in existence until about four years
ago, when the owner had them melted
and turned into sovereigns.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25
Laughing i'm Battle.

General Pleasanton said that even in
action, at the most critical point, he could
always see something that made him
laugh. 1t was at the battle of Brandy
Station, where the General distinguished
himself as a cavalry leader, that one of
these instances occurred. In the heat of
the engagement cavairyman's horse
was shot from under him. A shell had
taken off the horses hind legs clean, and
the cavalryman and horse rolled together
in the dust
:" That soldier" said the General, "was
the coolest man | ever saw. He got mp
and shook himself and commenced TO
take off hts saddle and bride, and care
fully piled them, with his other traps, in
a little heap. Although the shot were
screaming past him, and the air was full
of bullets and shell, he acted with as
much deliberation as if he were getting
ready for breakfast. That was what at
tracted my attention. l watched that
fellow, thinking that that was the kind of
a man | wanted in my escort, At that
moment another shell took off his horses
head, and ne looked at him moment,
and then put his foot upon the horses
body, about the only thing that was left
about the animal, and shook his fist at
the rebel battery over on the hill. II was
the most eomical sight to me | ever saw,
and | burst out laughing. | couldn't
help it, although we were in a pretty
tight place. The next morning | sent
over 10 the regiment to which the soldier
belonged and asked the name of the man
whose horse had been killed in the sin
gular manner stated. My orderly return
ed, saying that he couldn't find him.
When | inspected the regiment, or what
was left of it, that day, rode down the
line and looked at every man to see if l
could pick him out myself Don't you
know that could never find out that
fellow? You see, he had probably stolen
a horse from the quartermaster's depart
ment and had remounted himself, and
was afraid to come forward for fear of
court-martial He was brave fellow,
and | would have been glad TO have made
him sergeant. You see there were a
great many horses killed, and one man
could not be singled out very easily. 1t
was curious thing that after leaving
lot of dead animals on the battle field,
next day would see nearly every man
mounted, and in good condition. You
see, they would steal the horses from the
quartermaster's department, OF else
where"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25
A Sham Wedding Trip.

Fashion demands that when young
pesple marry they shall go away on a
wedding trip, which means no small out
lay of cash.
A couple recently married felt this
pressure, but conceived a scheme by
which to thwart the process of custom
and save the item ofexpense. They went
to the station, accompanied by party of
friends, and boarded train, with good
byes said all around, the friends extend
ing the regulation wishes for safe and
happy tour.
But the couple didn't remain on the
the train Oh, no They walked through
the car and out at the end opposite that
at which they entered, and getting off
the opposite side, sped down back
street to their home, where they remain
ed in seclusion for a week, while their
friends thought them away enjoying the
honeymoon.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25
WHOLE NO. 1871.
Divorce and Marriage.

My marriage was a very romantic
one" said Chicago gentleman at the
Palace Hotel, San Francisco, who is on
his bridal tour.
The lady's former husband was an in
innate friend Of mine. He is good fell
low, but he didn'tuse her well.
Although a gentleman in most respects,
he was so unfortunate as to have the
drinking habit, and occasionally, Will e
in liquor, he raised the deuce in the do
mestic circle.
Both he and the lady were accustomed
to come to me for advice after these af-
fairs.
Get divorce" said /, at last.
Agreed" says they and shook hands
omit.
Then they separated, pending the re-
suit of the legal proceedings.
visited the lady in her retirement
several times.
Frank" said the husband to me,
: don't you think you had better not call
on Lizzie while this divorce business is
in progress ?"
"Why, Bob,' says I. what the mis-
chief have you to do with the matter?'
' 1 don't like it" says he.
"But," says |, " the idea never occur
red to me before, but now that you sug-
gest it, / don't know but what | will. Do
you think she'll favor the idea her
self2o
Z" Pm blessed" continued the Chicago
man, " if the fellow didn't begin to fight
the divorce from that minute"
We downed him, of course, but he's
still cool, and even refused to attend the
wedding.
However, when we get home my wife
will manage to smooth him down she
knows his ways, you understand.
There's nothing so painful to me as
break in an old friendship, and we both
really like Bob wsry well, in spite of his
faults
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25
The way to get Rich.

A Land speculation. But said the
would-be purchaser, they tell me that
the land is covered by swamp"
Swamp, why, of course. It's the rich
est land in the world
I" But how am to get rid of the wa
ter?r
Pump it Off"
"Yes, but then it will be ON some
other mans land"
That's all right; let him pump it off
on to some one else's land. My dear sir,
you should never be bothered by what
is on some other mans land"
"Yes, but won't he pump the water
back on my land?"
"The very thing you want. The best
crops are raised that way. Pumping from
first one field to another brings about a
mutual system of iarigation. | got rich
that way."-Arkaasar TFaueler.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25
What Women Didn't Know.

/ thought women knew everything
about everything. But they don't.
don't like to tell this story ; it is kind
of giveaway. There were three or four
ladies enjoying that afternoon time when
all the gossip is manufactured and made
up in packages to be delivered around
town. They were having a charming
time when the China boy walked into
their midst, holding in his hand box of
paste of some kind. He handed it to the
lady of the house with the laconic re-
mark
Man down there sell 'em.'
They all grabbed for the box.
"What is it ?r said one
Il don't know" said the other, but
it's paste"
g. l don't know" said the hostess. ats
that new complexion paste we were read
ing about. Don't you remember? That
thing that Mrs. Langtry wrote a recon-
mendation for. 1t must be that.
" 1t must be good. Let's try it,
SO one of them took good big dab of
it and put it on her cheek, and another
put some on her chin, and another on
her forehead. Then they all began to
squirm. The first ones cheek was all
drawn up, and she could only speak out
of the side of her mouth the third ones
eyelids We're pulled up so that she could
not shut them.
well, never We don't want any of
that, anyway. John, take it away take
it away, .quick. Tell the man We don't
want it."
The Chinaman departed and found the
peddler sitting ON the front steps The
peddler rose up.
"Well," he said, I'm glad you've come
back. / thought you were cleaning all
the silverware in the house with it,
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25
What Pompeii Died Of.


A Post Erpress reporter ehaneed to be
standing beside the delivery desk of one
of the city Libraries when well-dressed
lady of thirty approached the desk. The
librarian was cutting the leaves of a new
copy of the 8 Last Days of Pompeiii, now
and then stopping TO read passage from
the famous novel. The lady glanced
around listlessly and said
al would like to find something new
in the way of nice reading. Nothing
very strong, you know, something light
and amusing. That is a nice looking
book you have there. What is il?
1t is the Last Days of Pompeii
Last Days of Pompeii '-Pompeii-
who was Pompeii? What did he die of?
never could bear tragedy"
"I believe he died of an eruption. Yes,
this is rather tragical,' replied the IL
brarian, with the faintest smile imagin-
able
The lady departed after securing some
thing light and amusing and with
out the slightest idea that she had fur
nished any amusement-RocheSier Post
EyDrsSs
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25
One Honest Man.

Among those in the east rooom was
DIR. Weiting, of Syracuse, n. Y. DIR.
Weiting owns the opera-house wherein
Cleveland was nominated for Governor.
The President shook the little doctors
hand quite cordially. There is good
story told of DIR. Weiting. Some years
ago he was lecturing in New York, and
after he had lectured he was approached
by young man who was an entire
stranger to him. The doctor was there
fore greatly surprised to hear him make
an extraordinary request. He had been
in the audience and heard the lecture,
and was eaptivated by the doctors elo-
quence, and he made bold to speak to
him. The young man said he desired to
go to California and wanted money.
give me one thousand dollars" said
he to DIR. Weiting, and III send you
one-half of every dollar | make in Cali.
fornia."
The doctor was SO surprised at the re-
quest that he did not say any thing for
some time, and finally asked the young
man who he was. The doctor learned his
name, and then asked him why he did
not go to his relatives. for money. The
young man replied that he had no rela-
tives.
After few days thinking over the
matter the doctor concluded to give the
money to the young man, and he did so.
A year or SO afterward DIR. Weiting re-
ceived 5000 from California. 1t was
marked "One-half the money / have
made" DIR. Weiting then wrote to the
young man that he considered that he
had complied with his promise, and re-
leased him; but the young man replied
he did not consider himself released, and
would carry out his bargain. Money
continued to come from California, until
DIR. Weiting had received $4,000. Then
it stopped, and he could not find the
young nah, and the doctor came TO the
conclusion that he was dead. The doctor
took the $4,000 and invested it in a
block of buildings. He had hardly
made the purchase before the entire
block burned down, and he lost all the
money made for him by the honest
young man in California Washington
Letter.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25
Cen. Grant in 1868.

| find in my notes a description of
Gen. Grant written behind Vicksburg,
in June 1863. II may be Of interest at
this remote date +" Almost at any time
one can see small but compactly built
man Of about - years of age walking
through the camps. He moves with his
shoulders thrown little in front of the
perpendicular, his left hand in the pock-
ct Of his trousers, an unlighted cigar in
his mouth, his eyes thrown straight for
ward, which, from the haze of abstrac-
ton which wells them, and counte-
nance plowed into furrows of thought,
would seem to indicate that he isintense-
ly preoccupied. The soldiers observe him
coming, and, rising TO their feet, gather
ON each side of the way TO see him, pass
they don't salute him, they only watch
him curiously, with a certain sort of
familiar reverence His abstracted air
is not so great while he thus moves along
as to see everything without apparently
looking at it you will discover this in
fact that, however dense the crowd in
which you stand, if you are an acquaint-
ance, his eyes will for an instant rest
on you with grave nod of recogni-
ton.
a plain blue suit without scarf, sword
or strappings of any sort, save the double
starred shoulder straps, an indiferently
good Kossuth hat, or slouch, with the
crown battered in close to his head, full
beard between light and sandy, square
cut face, whose lines and contour indi-
cate extreme endurance and determine
tion, complete the external appearance
of this small man, as one sees him pass
ing along, turning and chewing restless
ly the end of his unlighted eirgar. His
countenance in rest has the rigid immo-
bility of cast iron, and while this indi-
Gates the unyielding tenaeity of the bull
dog, one finds in his gray eyes smile
and other evidences Of the possession of
those softer traits seen upon the lips and
over the entire faces of ordiary people.
On horseback he loses all the awkward
ness which distinguishes him as he moves
about ON foot Erect and graceful, he
seems portion of his steed, without
which the full effect would be eincomplete.
Along with body guard of the General
rides his son Fred, a stout lad of twelve
summers He endures all the marches,
follows his father under fire with all the
coolness of an old soldier, and is, " chip
of the old block
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25

Last April she was with me, who, to-day
Is somewhere in the far-of world of God
Far off said II She is not far away
When Heaven and earth are sundered by a
sod.
Here is the spot where, in the rain-wet moss,
! found the first shy blossom ofthe spring;
| see, again, sun-shaft strike across
The flowers heart, and hear a robin sing.
And then | see her face, so fair. so sweet
So full of tender thoughts, and oh, so truel
And with that Aprirs joy my pulses beat
To-day, my darling, as / think of you,
No flower so sweet as violets, you said,
And took the blossom, smiling dreamily,
" Because they always bear, alive or dead,
This message born oflove: " think of thee. y
Here on this knoll we sat awhileto see
The amber sunshine fade to rosy light
And heard the hum of seme belated bee
In hiyeward-faring, pollen-laden fight.
" II hunts for sweets in every flower that
blows;
Some come too late, and find the flower is
dead;
For somethc stubborn flower will not unclose
And yield It's treasure TO the clam rous bee,
Bold, saucy privateer of summer days;
But my hearts flower has yielded all to thee, :"
You whispered, smiling softly, and the haze
OF twilight seemed to vanish from your face;
So sudden sunshine makes dark skies grow
bright,
And loves light, shining onward, filed the
place
With radiance lingering far into the night.
Again in dreams your loving hand hold
Again upon my cheek feel your breath.
0 grave dear grave, yet not one summer old,
In vain plead The graves door shuts for
aye
On those who cross its threshold. Still to
1t seems her presence haunts the place to-
day.
l cannot comprehend the mystery.
Though over her the April violet blows,
She is beside me; can touch her hand
| see her face if | one moment close
My eyes. Dear heart, you know, you under
stand
Though have lost you. you with me remain.
The graves sod hides you, but | have you
yet.
| wait for Heaven to make the mystery plain
And only know-you never will forget
-E5el f. Rcrford IN Current.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25
His Guess.

1t is sometimes said that city boys are
brighter than their country cousins, but
the opinion will hardly be verified by the
following true story
A Boston schoolmistress is in the habit
of giving her pupils word lessons that is,
she describes some familiar object, going
more and more into particulars, till some
one of the children makes sign that he
knows what it is. On this occasion she
began TO describe an animal which had
two legs and two wings, was covered with
feathers, lived most of the time in trees,
and so on when finally one little fellow
put up his hand.
"Well, what is it, Johnny ?" she
asked.
~ think it's cow" Johnny answered
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25
Sheridan's Courtship.

4
Not long since at dinner, given in
New York. General Sheridan related
an incidenf@that befell him while calling
on the young lady who is the present
Mrs. Sheridan
During the war General Sheridan Was
too much occupied defending hiscountry
to fall in love, When the malady finally
overlook him in Chicago, after the war,
Sheridan had passed what is generally
called the romantic stage and was settling
down into well seasoned old bachelor
hood. Old bachelors make the most en-
thnsiastic of lovers, and the General ad-
mitted that he was no exception to the
rule
1t was warm summer evening""
Sheridan began, "and upon my arrival
at the house the young lady and myself
retired to the back parlor. The front
parlor opened into the hall, and as the
night was warm, You know, we did not
think it necessary to light the gas in the
back room. Now this young lady's faith
er had great fear of burglars He had
burglar alarms all over the house, and
had recently put new alarm on the
front door. After a time the old gentle
man came down stairs, set his alarm on
the door, and seeing the dimlight in
the front parlor, supposed that | had gone
and turned out the light in the hail. We
were busily engaged in talking you know,
and somehow did not hear him. Finally
when | got up to. leave the young lady
accompanied me to the door. We were
surprised to find the light turned out,
and in filmbling around for the doorknob
/ set off the burglar-alarm. 1t seemed
to me that ! never knew burglar-aIarm
TO work so well before. 1t sounded like
the explosion of a keg of dynamite. A
moment later the father of the young
lady appeared at the head Of the stairs
in his night-dress, holding light in one
hand and large pistol in the other. At
this apparition the young lady deserted
me and fled into the darkness. My
position was positively dangerous. i
suppose | had been in dangerous places
before without thinking of it, but l con-
fess for the moment trembled all over
with fear, and scarcely mustered up
voice enough to say Don't shoot; it's
me-
Fortunately he recognized my voice
and came down and let me out.
Now, you know, gentlemen" he con-
cluded, if the young lady had stood by
me there would have been no danger,
but she kidn't you know, and my posi-
ton was rather awkward before was re-
cognized. One might die on the field of
battle without regret, but / should hate
to be shot asa midnightmarauder only
tell the story because if actually took
place as have said, and to show that
there are times when We may all lose our
courage"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25

Five quarts of petroleum is sufficient to
preserve a ship in yough sea. The oil
is generally applied to the surface in can
vas bags filed with oakum, through
which the oil trickles slowly. The bags
are attached to the Ieeward side of the
ship by long ropes.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25

Mistress and maid Where have you
been, janet" I've been to meeting of
the Girls Friendly Society ma'am."
well, and what did the lady say to
YOU" Please, ma'am, she said was to
give you warning, as l meant to. She
said that l was to look upon you as my
thorn--and bear it
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25

One of the dynamite shells recently
made for the United States Navy will
kill, it is thought. thousand men, blow
up man-ofwar or destroy Government
building.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25

A French writer has described young
lady as a creature that ceases to kiss
gentlemen at twelve and begins again at
eighteen.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25

Barbed-wire fences are now used by
many English farmers to protect their
premises from the depredations of hunt
ers, who seemingly delight in tranping
down the crops and destroying the
fences.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25

ARE you made miserable by Indiges-
ton, Constipation, Dizziness, Loss of APP
petite, Yellow Skin? Shiloh's Vitalizer is
a positive cure. Sold by g. w. Benford
q Son.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25

WHY win you cough when shiloh's
Cure will give immediate relief Price,
10 cents, 80 cents, and 81. Sold by Geo.
w. Benford & Son.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25

A Washington lady has rare curiosi-
ty in shape of an egg inside of an egg.
Both eggs have perfectly formed shells.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25

The men and horses of the Indiapolis
fire department are afflicted with mild
distemper, one of the men being nearly
blind.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25

Who takes an eel by the tail, or wo-
man at her word, soon finds he holds
nothing. b -.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25

The bindings of books in the British
museum have a special significance. His
torical works are in red, theological in
blue, poetical in yellow, and natural his
tory in green.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-05-25
THERE, YET HERE.

Last April she was with me, who, to- day,
Is somewhere in the far-off world of God
Far off. said T? She is not far away
When Heaven and earth are sundered by
sod
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1887-09-03
Che 5Ailg 8NllGtin
II dSoi 10 neither Sect oor Party,
But established ior the benefit Of all.
SATURDAY. SEPT. $. 1887.
MODERN BUSINESS TRAINING.

The London Chamber Of Com
merce recently instituted an inquiry
in regard to the Employment of
foreign clerks by city firms. 1t was
found that young Germans, trained
in the special institutions established
in Germany since 1879, are sup
planting young Englishmen. The
fact was also elected, that 80 per
cent of the business firms of London,
having dealings in other countries,
are either wholly German, or largely
so. The fact is, that business, that
is, commercial enterprise, is year by
year so broadening its basis of
action, that it demands, alike special
lists, trained for particular depart
ments, and men of organizing abili-
ties and comprehensive grasp of
mind, to attempt to conduct our
modern business undertakings.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1887-09-03

drafted by the national executive
officers Of the order, and which is
known among Grand Army men as
the "Pauper Pension BILL" The
draft was prepared several months
ago, and Fairchild issued a procla-
nation calling on all Grand Army
posts to vote upon it, in the hope of
securing their approval. The pro-
clanation of the Commander-in-
chief following closel Y on his denun-
citation of the President for vetoing
the Dependent Pension bill, was
signal for an earnest discussion of
the subject Of pension bills by the
posts. There are filty.three posts
in the city, and most of them have
arrived at their decision. In every
instance they have declined to in
dorse the "Pauper Pension bill' and
have announced their support of the
Service Pension bill.
New York, August 20.-George
Bernslti, President Cleveland's sub.
stitute in the Union army during the
Rebellion, died yesterday in the
hospital of the Soldiers Home, of
consumption, aged "a years. He
came to the home from the Buffalo
Alms-house, and has been in the
hospital since last October.