Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-12-10

From Harpsrs Bss.r.
II ID often somewhat shocking to people Of mid
die age, or past that period, to observe the non
chatancs with which far too many Of the young
ladies' Of the present day speak Of their engage
nents Of marriage; that is with no shrinking, or
hesitation, or reserve, and, rs It would appear to
the observer with no delicacy. And not only Is II
the want OF deficacy that strikes one, but . want
If %.s. the me q
especial significance unless one pleased, an mr..
rangement Tor lunch, rendezvous at q reception,
msnt, which is something that must Be kept but
part Of the fnvoiities Of life, not TO be looked at
n or spoken % a.
agreeable, ana broken as lightly a. o bubble q
child blows from pipe.
are formed IL source of surprise and shock again
to the reputable midded-aged woman, who Is con-
WINGED that things were not Done 30 In ner young
days--the total levity and want OF sentiment, the
young mans purse and general ability TO provide
a fine ulenage and equlpage having more TO do
with the solidarity Of the enterprise than virtue OF
and pleasant temper being enough FOR the tempo
rary arrangement, and the temporary arrange
for the season. terminable, like various other Co
partnerships, at the will OF either party.
But equally is 1t a matter Of pain and trouble to
the astOnished observer TO notice the manner In
which the engagements are broken, letters re-
turned, all but tell-tale few; some gfts returned
and some retained; little romance, little senti-
ment, as II Just for the plays sake, few tears,
under which the laugh comes sparkling presently,
and the way is clear for the next asplrant. And
any event OF yesterdays dinner or of last nights
young person was engaged to so-and-so; or no.
were 30 epris with each other' The whole affair
OF The engagement is glove that has been drop
ped ower that has faded story that Is , soid
on the repettions OF the little drama Is shocked
perhaps no more by one portion OF It than an
other the want OF reserve Is as bad in her eyes
the want OF faith the want OF faith no worse than
the want OF reverence. In her eyes contract 10 q
contract, and her engagement OF marriage would
be binding, according to her belief, simply As q
contract; and although she might find 1t abso-
lutely necessary at last that 1t should be broken
she would reach that point only after long de-
lay and hesitancy and reluctance, and never as
she would tear on faded corsage bouquet and
fling IL into the gutter driving home from the ball.
For girl to have broken an engagement; Of mar ,,
something that causes the girl TO be looked at
askance, either as person OF unstable mind and
dlsoyal faith, or as one whose character has been
found wanting by her lover on further acquaint-
ance. In her day, when young lady broke her
engagement, or had 1t broken for her, She went
into retirement for q season like young widow,
and did not brazen 1t out as II she had done no
more than promise to go to picnic and had then
thought better or IL.
There seems TO the quiet II critical onlooker
singular profanity about the business, and she
feels this the most In remarking the careless way
in which the engagement is formed, as II one
rushed into the Hoy OF Holes and without re-
moving the shoes from ones feet. Better an In
fnity OF times. she confesses, are all the broken
engagements in the world beforehand, than broken
marriage and divorce afterward. But In her code
OF morals there should be- neither. The very idea
OF marriage should be approached with as much
reverence as an altar and the observer feels 1t pos
sible that neither youth nor maiden would advance
so gaily upon the sacred ytum had he or she
any idea or the holiness OF the shrine within
In some countries, she remembers, the be-
trothal Is felt to be nearly as bind
ing, as formal, ceremonial, and religious an act
as marriage itself, as the marriage which, in
form OF religious belief at least, is regarded as a
sacrament; and in some parts OF our own country
she knows that the affair is so mOdestly con-
Quoted that an engagement is never spoken OF till
preparations are making for the wedding, al
though this may be going as much too far ON the
other side. And while this is beyond the GEN.
sors strctest idea, she would yet have little OF
the church-gOing feeling about the maiden's heart
In accepting her lover, and she would have the
affair taken so seriously that no lover would be
received IS such just for the convenience OF the
seasons pleasure and attendance just to lift the
reprOach from vanity, or because SU-and-so had
lover but received only when he had come to stay
and where he was so worthy that the intention
was to keep him,