The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-09-04

as someone said: 10 him that hath shall be
Not always" he remarked, looking at the
gorgeous ignoramuses.
The spectacle of dud;shly- dressed gentleman
holding with gingerly touch lady's hustle and
shoes attracted the attention of great crowd at
Long Branch the other day. 1t the Gus
tomary throne of bathers in front of a hotel.
augmented by many besides who knew that they
to be repaid by sight-always too funny
for anything-of gentleman handling a ladys
apparel. I don't think there is an article worn
by man that any woman. married or single. can
not carry, or fold, or pack up with much dig
nifty and grace as she can the belongings of her.
self; but with a man it is different. No matter
how cool and self possessed he may be at other
times, and no matter how cultivated and0harm-
ing his usual manners. give him lady 8
bustle or even her hat, to hold, or to fold or to
do anything under the sun with, and instantly
he becomes pitiful object of clumsness and
constraint with his fingers all thumbs and his
wits all astray. Funny, isn't it, but not to be
denied. So it was this morning with this
hustle. It was poked out to him from the IN
glazed aperature in the top of a bath-house door.
at the end of plump and pink arm, the unclad
condition OF which excuse enough for the
lady's non-appearance in person on the scene.
He held the innocent construction OF
tape and wire precisely as he
would have held live crab, far
from him and with the tips of his fingers He
probably knew as we'll as any woman could tell
him that bustles never hurt ANYBODY, except
their wearers, but he man, and 1t was
part OF lady's dress. and that was sufficient.
The occasion the settlement OF wager
that was ali the talk among a certain rather un-
conventional set assent bled as boarders together
{ a DcOtfape-theatricAl
all proper enough, but bent on having fun. An
actor among them had ended week OF hot
discussion to which the heavier
clothes by betting with another man in the
party that men carry less weight in garments
in hot weather than women 1t had been de-
clded that certain young woman of operate
hopes. but only concert realizations. should SUBJ
NIT to having her clothes weighed in the same
scales with those of the actor who made the
wager No particular time for the solution of
the problem was agreed upon, but the young
singer assures me that, so IS not to be taken off
her guard, and as to win victory for hers
sex, she never afterward put anything that
was not OF the llghtest weight among all her be-
longlngs She ran a tremendous risk of pneu-
monia-but what true woman would care a fig
for little thing like that. under such circum-
stances. The actor may have done the same
thing. but it thought that he took no ad-
vantage of his opportunities. On this morning
it had been agreed upon that the test should be
made at the bath. Hence the man and the
hustle.
The wise young concertsinger first handed
out white lawn dress-a mere web, all lace
and open-work, where such things both
fashionable and possible. 1t and its belt of rib
bon weighed precisely one pound the spring
scales borrowed of the cook at the boarding
house Then came three white skirts which
weighed two pounds, ana the hustle and Shoes
which weighed one pound, three ounces These
were followed by stockings, cuffs, collar and
handkerchief weight altogether four ounces
and a hat that weighed five ounces. The cor
sets, stigmatized in books and lectures for half
a century as barbarous and brutal, weighed
what do you supposed Three ounces and
more. Next came little whisp of white dry
goods caught tightly around the middle with a
piece of twine.
what is this?' the judge and weigher in
quired.
Never mind" came the answer: cit isn't
is that there is more than piece there, and
you are not to unite the string on your honor"
This was agreed to, the lazy lookers-on saying
they would see the promise kept and the judge
wrote down. 'Those, eight ounces"
There was as much figuring and arguing over
the conversion of pounds into ounces and ounces
back again into pounds as ever followed the at
tempt of Miss Corson's class produce q dish
of terrapin sauce but at last this result was an
nounced: Total weight of Miss Blanks things"
(note the mannsh way of speaking of what he
deemed SO mysterious that even tho good old
word CLOTHES" never occurred to himj, fifty
seven ounces or three pounds and nine ounces"
Then came the weighing of the actors apparel,
and the first thing hooked the scales by the
way, outweighed the lady's clothes tremendously,
much so that if it had not been for a woman
of sense standing by, who knew that the whole
world would like to know the truth about this
much vexed question. nothing more would have
been put on the scales, and the bet would have
been settled This first thing was the actors
outer suit of trousers, vest and unlined sack
coat. These weighed five pounds precisely.
Think of i'll Thirteen ounces more in the mans
outermost garments than in all that the lady
wore. The weights set down to the actors
credit land discomfture) were as FOLLOWER