Telegram-herald., 1887-11-20
sHoRr-saoIS

Bridling the passions Is ike iassoing
Texas OrOrchc.
Those who lad the most faults gen.
orally have them.
Mems graves are as often dug with
their teeth as with shoyels.
Epigrams are generally like tirecracksrs
III sound and no bullets.
A stump orator is like shotgun that
scstteFs. Neither ever hit anything.
A nuptlal kno. should never be tied
about the NECK of the man or the woman.
Refuse to follow your nose when it
pokes itself into other peoples business.
To Argne with an angry man is like
teaching stage tricks to dog with the
rabies.
Fzlsehood is like harp out of tune.
However skillfuily fingered, the result is
discord.
spare the rod and spoil the child"
means that you shall break the cudgei,
not use Z.
II Herr Mosr IS not smendabls TO any
other Law, have him arrested as an in
decent exposure.
Mcdssty shows itself by blush, the
same as crimson horizon prophesies
the rising of the sun.
The belief thss ''Eise head keeps q
close mouth" has elevated q great many
fools to high positions.
Between q politician end an Office
seeker there Is the same difference as
between your eyes. Who knows?
Tie head and stomach often do battle
like very ssvsgss while thsir province Is
to shake hands and bs brothers.
A froIcsome girl is often like the Ca
vorting fIly which kicks everything to
pieces at the approach of q harness.
A doctor who has the courage to swal-
low his own physic should have carried
the colors st tho charge OF the six hun
drsd."
Professional performers are l'ke old
wind-miils with ungeared attachments.
They 20 on with their rafting, but grind
no grIsts.
The new marriage law need to
bave gone only step further to make a
fellow blow a horn every time be kisses
the girl ne Is courtiag.
III. word-dressing OF truth should be
Ike The transparent ssr6s Of the Roman
ballet gir.s. which displayed the match
less beauty and plsy CT wind.
The worlds dsprsvity may De proven
because worthless weeds choke ont the
rsress Of lowers; but it is no reason Why
the weeds should not be dug mp.
Eating what you do not ike because it
may be said 10 Ga healthy. Is making I
quack doctor Of the COOK, and a medicine
chest out OF bsnqusti3g board.
The same law that grants divorce OF
the ground OF incompaiebihty OF tenn
per ought 10 suthOrizs the husband tC
Kick ais wife out OF bsd If she has coll
feet.
Tne mother who told hsr children not
to put beans IN their noses aud ears
while Sue called on q Dsigboor. cam'
home 10 fad their heads were full O
them.
TIE same maiden who VII jump az
feet into the sir and yell ~bloOdy Eur
der ss tie sh5 OK mouse, viii q mt
= dinly y-lizhtsd pArlor vith great ~brut
% = mar" snd-lst him put bis sru
around her.
n the young bloods vho drink su'
snoks were obliged 10 give their sister
or sweetheart. dine every time the.
indulge. these Gsmssls would soon b
! rich enough 10 marry and srasTfly sup
port their husbands.
A Girl who cries hys-sri cslly With "a
bsck-ache II hsr mother makes her vas
dishes. will dance all night ike a. Tndis
rubber man, st masquerade bal, G
uslk forty niles throuSh The fssh.onsbI
psrt of The torn. toe day after she IA
| zct on new co8Bst.
Monopoiies ara q Trsas svil: but that
70 excuse sar Blowing up the StsEdsr
/ on Compsny's paiasisi ofics IN Ns'
Tark. nor does i warrant e1tfing e.
stockholders thros5s Because tbecloa
msy "a behind tie sgs. ISs sEsoLL 81,
his followers must net sst Ere 20 On
z1zrzAes % 2ynzzasks sas sli>r&