The climax. [volume] (Richmond, Madison County, Ky.) 1887-1897, 1887-11-30
FULL OF FUN.

one language may yet understand a
great many Ongu1S-PJpu!Gr Sci
eHce.
Then you don't like hashP" said
the landlady sternly. II don't object
to hash" exclaimed the boarder, tits
rehash kick at"
"A messenger-b5y was seen run
ming with frightful rapidity the other
day. He had message for gentle
man at the Polo Grounds. Puck.
After a man has INDUCED in a
long paroxysm of coughing nothing
annOys him more than TO have some
body ask him if he has got a cough.
When young man sits in the
parlor talking nonsense to his best
girl, that's capital Bat when he has
to stay in of evenings after they re
married, that's labor. Judge.
Old LADY, think it is perfectly
awful the way the young men of to-
day are captivated by games of chance,
don't you?" Old Gentleman-"O, no,
ma am; Tn a regular attendant at
? tAAS Dtt'S-DtbiA ttiiOo oSEAs
They both kick
Boys differ very much from guns,
As all experience teaches;
Boys kick, when kicking, with their boots,
But guns kick with their breeches.
Golden Days.
"A Large Heart. - Mamma
"Why. Charley. what are you crying
fOr?" Charley (who has eaten the
only piece of pie on the plate, while
Willie looked wistfully on)-"Cause -
they, they amt no pie for-Willie. -
Life.
Bartender Ito customeD-"You
are putting water in your whisky, sir.
thought you always drank it
straight Customer (hastily)-
''Why, so 1 do. 1 forgot myself for
the moment" Bartender - That's
what l thought. Well, how is the
milk business. Mr.. Yelloh?"-M y
San.
The definition of wedding" in
the fashion vocabulary means Il grand
crisis of clothes; bride" a peg on
which fincry of all kinds is hung;
bridegroom" a sober. black object
following the bride, of no account
in particular, yet without whom there
would be no fuss, and the fun could
not 60 on.
Can any of you tell me-" said
the teacher, 'what system of book
keeping is in operation in our banks?'
Double entry, sir" said the bright
boy of the class. Correct; and now
can you give nc . definition of double
enty?' Yes. sir; the one entry is
for the bank and the other is for the
cashier. "-J51dge.
With two forms 'pieT' and in
state of 'innocuous desuetude," the
editor on the sick list, part of our new
material at the bottom of the Red
river, and our new press delayed by
bridge accident, we really must apollo
gize for any thing unusually dizzy in
the appearance of our paper to-day
Tyler (TeE) Tribune.
-'Gracie." said the fifty-cent-ex-
cursion-young-man, as they leaned
over the brink of the falls and saw the
river leap out and go swirling and
laundering into the gorge. "Gracie,
why is my love for you like them
ceascless movin' wa ers?' cause
it's all gush," she simpered and he
groaned softly to himself: Another
fifty cents wasted. "-BufaIO Courier.
"A lady had in her employ an ex-
cellent girl, who had one fault-her
face was always grimy. Mrs. X,
wishing to tell her to wash her face
without off ,nding her, at last resorted
to strategy. do you know, Bridget"
she remarked. in confidential man
ner, THAT if You wash your face every
day in hot soap-and-wa'cr it will make
you beautiful" ''Will it, now?" an
swered the willy Bridge. "Sure, it's
a wonder We never trieI it. ma am"
-HarTer's BazTr
IL don't see why your friend Miss
Smith referred to my mustache as
down Maude." said young sissy to
his pretty cousin. There is nothing
of the down about IL; it quite bristles.
l have to shave twice week. assure
YOU" Il know it brisiles, Charley"
returned the girl, knitting her brOws,
although not very fiercely, and l am
as much perplexed as you are to
understand why G ara should speak of
it as down. Is Idden happy thought.)
Perhaps, Charley. it's because it grows
on IA goose. IN Y Stm