Morning journal and courier., 1887-05-19
SEEM ING.

Young Lady-'Papa, what is the Potter's feld?" Father-'sPotter's felds Well, she seems to think it's the stage. ."-Puck.
 sfWhy didn't you stopan said the fat pas- senger as he clambered on to the car. "Ye didn't signal, replied the driver. '.I stood on the corner" Well, I'm no mind reader, :" said the driver, flashing his horses.-New York Sun.
 'fI tell you, it's all nonsense,' said the ed itor, after selling six sacks of declined mauu- scripts to the junk dealer and sorting over $11 worth of unused postage stamps; ''it's all nonsense to contend that there are no profits in literature. Life.
 Rev. Minot J. Savage says that the stom- ach has nothing whatever to do with seasick ness. Hence it is not necessary for man to leave his stomach ashore when he goes to sea in order to escape seasickness. The more we find out the longer we iYe.-Norristown Herald.
 sHullo, Harry! what's the news?" "Oh! nothing particular. I was just reading about the burying of 150 miners in a British Co., lumbia coal mine. What do you gets" 'sThey say our nine has got whitewash!" "Thun- der! you don't say sol But that is bad!"- Boston Transcript.
 Hard to believe: "Read of that case in Jersey City?' he queried of a patrolman on Griswold street. 'FWhieh?' ''Why, 8 po- iceman slept seventeen days and nights at a stretch" Don't believe anything of the sort. /" was the blunt rejoinder. 'Pve tried it myself dozen different times, and I ney- CT got in over fifteen minutes before the roundsman woke me up.''-Detroit Free Press.
 the passengers in a Texas smoking car was riveted on 8 strangely acting negro. He rocked himself from side to side without ceasing. Whats the matter with you?' asked Andy Faulkner, who was in the car ''Does yer know Dan McGarys" "Of course do.'' ''Well, sah, he sold me silver watch for $2O," continued the negro, still swaying from side to side, "and eff I stops movin' dis heah way de watch don't go no moah."- Texas Siftings.
 A Wonderful Change-"Why, how are you, Sniverly?" exclaimed an cratic Austin man, trying to thrust his hand into the un- willing, elammy paw of the supposed &C., quaintance; "how you have changed! Never saw man change so in my life" "My name is not Sniverly," replied the stranger, in cold, thiTty-six- degree belowzero-tone. "Great Heavensl' ejaculated the Austin man, s'worse and worse. You have not only changed wonderfully in your personal ap~ pearance, but even your name is changed. d."- Texas Siftings.
 Dangers of Excess.-Gethamite- Yes, I've heard about those real estate booms out W oSt OO you to OcoA Ao1pAuS tucA1 oAoAS, eh?" Returned speeulator-"Yes, but we made one big mistake. We overdid the thing and came back poorer than we left" Gothamite-ss That doesn't seem possible. :" Returned speculator-"Its true az preaching We got the people so crazy about real estate values that when we attempted to leave town they noticed our muddy boots and arrested us for grand larceny. ."-Tid- Bits.
 A lot or chairs all in a row
 Comprised the fast express;
 Conductor, noisy Master Fred;
 The passenger, wee Bess,
 Past Lansdown Northbrook, Riverside,
 It swiftly onward sped,
 Each stop with gravity announced
 By pompous Master Fred.
 But running short of names at last,
 ''Heaven!n he loudly cried.
 At this wee Bess got up and seized
 The grip-sack by her side,
 And said in tone demure, sincere,
 "I dess I'll dit off here!''
 Hampers Bazar.