Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1887-04-02

Book of Books. Clement wynkoop, cold in death,
was discovered one morning, six months after our
nrf meeting, sitting in armchair in the parlor
OF magnificent saite Of apartments in an up
town hotel In New York city. packet OF papers
found In the room and addressed to me contained
the following letter and extracts from the unfOr
tunate mans journal.
The letter was dated midnight.
Il do not know why should have selected you"
II began, 'as the person to whom to commit, be-
fore go hence, the secret that for the last year
and half / have carried as the Spartan boy car
r1ed the wolf / am impelled to write however,
impelled by an Undesirable something that tells
me cannot die until have made a fSll and free
confession to man as well as to God OF my crime
and my punishment. And with the impulse to
write comes also the impulse to address that con-
fession to you. This must be my apology. Per-
haps the fact that you already know Something OF
call certain Incidents of our first meeting at Ber-
ryyille six months ago-has had somewhat to do
with my selection OF legatee. l beg Of you do
| fering under two years from tonight BY that
| time my faults viii, perhaps have been in a
more kindly OF me and give me a larger share OF
| their sympathy than II the story were given when
my shortcomings and idiosyncrasies were fresh
In their memories 70 mitigate the pathos OF the
tale. Some day wish you to tell It. / wish it
told because, possibly, 1t may save others from a
'1n few hours i shall have passed the veil
which hides the other world from this. You Will
find me sitting here In this chair, and the news
papers-yours and mine and the others-win re-
cord another suicide People win want to know why
l died Ten them because OF physical suffering
which had grown uDbearable-that win look well
in print. That Is all that the coroners Jury need
know for the purpose Of a verdict.
II have resolved that my last hour shall be a
bright one. / do not want to go out OF my misery
in gloom aid darkness. My life has been gloomy
and dark enough, God Knows It's last moments
chosen and paid literally vi for III the best
room In the hotel; 1 have lighted every
mel IN Of t1 WHICH sss eat os aars f
/ have, wine, too, and with the wine shall drink
my release. have it here before me as wr1te-a
Scheeles hydrocianic acid 1t is an easy death,
they say. My heart-beatS will grow slower and
slower more feeble and more feeble until they
away from all the toll, the WEAKNESS the regret,
the po5tiica!on and the agony Of this s Life into
| lation is vain Before / go / shall burn every
paper l possess-eyery trace OF my past life will
| be gone except what is contained In the pages
| from my journal that shall select and leave in a
packet with this letter for you. Don't judge me too
| harshly. Think OF me kindly sometimes. have
thrown open the windows and raised the shades
| to the top. feel the cool midnight air tanning
my face Tor the last time. In an hour all Will be
over"
The letter broke on thus. There was no formal
ending, Just as there had been no formal begin
ming.
The enclosed extracts from the journal were as
| follows:
CHICAGO, December %, 1s79-Hard work yester-
day ATTENDING Christmas celebrations. When it
was all over Potter, Stevenson, and some others
| spent the rest of the night at Gibbons place.
Metaphysics and religion the subjects OF the con-
brating the birth OF a humbug Poor little Potter
is superstitious little fool with reverence largely
developed. He was hOrror-Stncken at the way /
talked, and i rather believe he thought / was
boasting, but was not. offered to bet him q
months pay he could not prove that there was
any reality in the God he believed in.
"Prove TO me there is not Goo, i" he said.
Your God Is all powerful, is he mott" asked.
. ~, ID be 81 SURE he replied .,,o, .,.+ u
me dead; defy hint"
Little Potter turned pale at what he termed my
''damna6le blasphemy" laughed at him. for there
was no sign OF that alleged Allpewerful Beings
existence. still stood erect and smiling. Potter
said his God would not deign to notice such a
ton OF the Supreme Ruler. Did think l could
eau down HIS Visible wrath at my own sweet Wilt
Poor Sss nsss Potter!
which time have not had the courage to write.
Even now / do not know how TO tell the story
am dying by inches? Can 1t be that there Is a
God, and that He heard my threat? deSpiSe my
self for being so weak as TO believe 1t; and yet
am undergoing an experience that Is as horrible as
II Is unusual On the morning following the night
of my boast before the boys at Gibbons, 1 awoke
arm, as If the circulation had been stopped and
had suddenly started again. The next morning
my arm was numb. The circulation had appar-
emily stopped, and had not gone on again, nor
has it since been resumed My arm and hand have
grown colder and colder, ana both are a deathly
gray white, like the arm and hand of dead man,
while my finger nails are Ivid. Curiously enough
though, there Is no sign OF decomposition, and my
hand still retains its power Though all feeling Is
and can write as Wen as ever. Where vii Vial an
this end? That is the question. There Is some
thing hideOuSly unnatural about 1t, and am
afraid for that reason to consult physician.
have rubbed that arm and hand until the skin has
peeled of, and yet there has not been the slight
est sensation nor the fantest sign OF circulation
From shoulder to finger tips it Is dead, dead,
JANUARY 5-Heaven help me, or shall 20 mad,
this thing that has seized upon me! That it is the
curse OF God or devilI have no longer the slight
est doubt. Ever since my hand grew so marvelously
cold have refrained from shaking hands with any
one for fear the unnaturalneSS of 1t would be re-
marked and 1 should be questioned. To-day my
old uncle from st. Louis called at the Office to see
me, l had not met him for month of SUNDAYS
and, as he was always favOrite uncle OF mine
had grasped his hand before thought what was
doing. He sprang back with cry that sent a
thrill through me. The utmost horror was pic
tured in every feature. dropped the hand was
recover himself enough to speak Then he told me
OF the strange thing he had seen. AS took his
hand, he said and he felt its Icy pressure my face
stared classify, and my skin looked blOOdlesS and
cold while my parted lips were purple.
81 could have sworn death had suddenly come to
you, as you stood there" he said 30 my bow. YOU
cannot imagine the shock you gave me
All! yes know It now, that same vision will
haunt every one whom touch. / am a leper.
/ The time must come when men will fee from me
as they would from a plague. After all there
| OOu-Au-DOWerIul.
hearing, all-Seeing Have not proof OF it? Is not
| this Gods recOmpenSe?
OCTOBER 81 am going East. There is suspl-
cfon here that there Is a mystery about me- and I
cannot abide it. II any man should discover INV
secret and make 1t public think would xiii him.
| NEW YORK, November Ill met a man at Rerry
| Vile yesterday named Holt. He is on the Tribune
Had TO sleep with him because the hotel was
| crowded. During the night my hand fell upon him
| and awoke him, and the usual result followed I
turned 1t on In the morning by telling him he had
been dreaming. II he had Insisted that il was NOT
dream, and had guessed the truth, God knows
what would have done.
| DECEMBER 26.-JuSt year has passed since W "a
| stricken with this living death. IL seems like a
| century. And now the worst is coming On God
| Is this just: i reported Christmas Sermon YES
terday, the burden OF which was that there is for
| g1veneSS for all who ask it. Christ was born to
save the worst OF US. And yet cannot ask It. This
Is part OF my punishment. Is it that have com
United the objectionable sin? The thOug bit drives
| me mad! Win relief never come?
4 JANUARY j, 1SSi.I have been making New
Years calls, with my arm in q sling. was com
peeled 10 resort 10 that as means OF avoiding
| shaking hands with my right hand. Cartwright.
OF The Posi-, who Is a literary chap, and somewhat
| OF society man, wanted me to Join him In his
New Years calling, and to oblige him. and for the
sake OF diversion, did so. Perhaps IL Is the most
| unfortunate step have ever taken. At one house
met most Charming little woman, as pretty as
picture and as gentle as tame dove. Margaret
| WNloughby she Is called. We had the pleasanfesf
| OF pleasant Chats, and when left her She Invited
| me 10 call again. Shall go? MY reason bids me
not to; my heart tells me cannot keep away.
4 JANUABY2l.-Ih have Sapn WfJlO,,Oh nv cot,