New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1887-09-25
THE MYSTERY OF GOOD BREEDING.
Frtnt The London queen.

Subtle. fragrant, Undesirable, but all.perva dns
Is that lovely thing we call good breeding. AS subtle
it's ,mgainly opposite. Keenly CONSCIOUS OF thu
absence Of the former but unable TO exactly specify
ana SenG no %hta in cases Of eSepon
Iweetness and refinement, when we can touch tho
exact action and repeat the commanding word which
governed all. so with Ill breeding. We can scarcely
say where 1t unless the mlsdcmeanor was as deep
az q well and as wide as church door: but there
II was, and we felt and knew whether we were able
to define it or not No one can de esod dscod
the subtle harmony and passing favor OF true polite
heard in an nysr aoo an sceS,ST
its twin but with Just that difference OF application,
thor than meaning which eson c OK
OF a stranger-the specialized attention OF an unob-
rusye kinds Its eyaeaoe er nnG M SGs 81
To be the only stranger in room nI OF ntlmates and
10 be unnrodnced and neglected ~ Is an act OF III.
Rtnd-hearted to begin with, and more polished b.
9n n to 60 on and w oe any attention or reels on
the thread Of conversation; that person has this
the rest have been deficient. when you enter
and presented 10 the hostess her reception
way her children meet yontho way in which. al any
age beyond the mcrrst babvhOOd they sreat and hold
themselves-is so eloquent OF their gentle training
or mngcntie as is a correct ascent provincial No
ldosyncrasy the real essence 81 go0o breeding,
and all the excuses made for lanses aud lesons ara
and her limbs may be as aWhw,rdiy hung 'o g
same her good breeding will be evident, and neither
her shvness nor her awkwarlness will tell against
sustain a connected conversation and though by tho
very fact of her shyncss her brain Will run dry, She
Will sustain II with the most consImmae polteness
will put ressrant on herself and tax her pest oad
as a an% myseV Of good breeding and thinks Of others
rather than herself But an Inbred person. II shy
is simply boorsh and takes no trouble to conquer
the dumb demon within hun, but gives way to u and
lets II conquer him at It's pleasure lou Ieei uLs
the excuse made for him-Or her-by those VINO "ahe
RI smooth over aspeltes with varnlst-that excuse
of being so "dreadfuy shy'-iS no excuse Al an fop
You know by experience now s"eeI "a cnsts her
can be that welbred bundle Of nerves and fears VINO
hat also who is as thoughtful for Others as the boor
" Good breeding IL the current coin Of society lie
who il bankrupt therein ought not TO take rank with
the rest The defaulting Lombard had his bench
broken IN full eonclave and was chased OUT OF me
street where his better endowed breh n carried on
puc si95usqo-Aau9m RIS ~ 9s%M meu 1sM
society ought to do to the ll-brcd-to the people who
oppose all you say for the mere sake 81 opposing
YOU and not for ANYTHING approaching to principles
Who contradict YOU 1atly, and do not apologize when
they proved I'm the wrong: VINO zen YOU nome nom.
who repeat ll-natured remarks made In eir presence
or repeated to ;hem making YOU eei that you , %e
SNithout the chance given you Of sel'jnsthcatDn:
vino abuse your known friends and a'clihe to them
all the sins OF the Decalogue: who brutally Attack
Tour known principles In religion, morals, politics.;
Who sneer at your cherished supcr'tr3n7 ara IA!
MINER hand Of YOU generally, not counting your
suscepbilitles worth the traditional button. SUCH
ICople as these-and there are many 81 inem mas
nueradlng a. ladies and gentlemen % good position and
rrcproachable credcntals-bpt no matter what their
lineage nor fortune they should he cl'hcIri: ana
society would be all the swcctcr and more Wholesome
for the want OF rhcm Contrast these spny hedgehogs
these aggressive thorn-bushes, these singing mos
ouitOes and rampng tarantulas with their opposes-
tho wcll-bred and gentle folk who never wound YOU,
eyef !'g1 1 a GT way ard Who CAREFULLY carry ous
Of shi all cr own Gvne ot % want fN Tn eonn Mas
but 10 Is good breeding