Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1887-02-25
pITH AND POINT.

Silence may be golden, but 1t doesn't
necessarily MAKE a millionaire out oil
mute. --Phiiadeiphia cal.
"A young lady teacher in the Seward
public schools fell heir to $4,000. Her
name was Began at last accounts =
Omaha Republican.
-"What time did John go away last
night, Mary Amp at was quarter
of twelve, father" "Three," she said
to herself. "are a quarter of twelve"
"A New Yorker shot at his wife, but
the bullet hit nothing but her store hair.
1t is very hard to get at the exact bound
aries of a woman nowadays. Omaha
World.
I'm 'fraid of the darkr' said baby,
smuggling up to mamma one night.
"WhyP" asked mamma "Cause it
comes so close to me. ~ YoutA'S Com
pdnion.
1t is said that William d. Howells
collects material for his novels by sh OPP
ping with his wife. Few authors secure
sufficient money return from their nov
els to adopt such an expensive mode OF
collecting material -NoTiStot0n Her.
aid.
Customer to coal -dcaler-Have you
got any name for those scaleA Of yoursP
II never heard Of scales having a
name" swell, you ought to call your
scales ambush. You see they are al
ways lying in weight. "-Teras Sytings.
"A correspondent wishes to know
show to get rid of u fool. :" Procure a
loaded gun. put your mouth over the
muzzle and touch the trigger with your
toe. The bullet should be swallowed
whole. - Burlington Free Press.
Jones would not be surprised at
any thing. Smithers-Not if an angel
were to appear Jones-Well, that
might aStonish me little. "a female
angel, for instance?" "Female angelo
There amt any other kind; not much. "
Pittsburgh Dispatch.
An instrument has been invented
called plethysmograph, which meas
ures the expenditure of mental force in
thinking. A man in financial difficult
ties who has note TO meet, will, it is
estimated, wear out two plethySmo-
graphs n day.-Boston Courier
Two young women were gazing in
a shop window. Said one, "Isn't it a
love Of bennett I'm tempted to buy
it, even if it is expensive" Said the
other, mo, don't you do it; you are
too excited now. You would be sure to
regret it tomorrow morning. IN y
san.
-Calino receives letter from NADIA
gascar. II is dated from Maujakauda-
r ananbana "Why do they use such
long namesP', asks one of his friends
Because" replied Calino, sit is
country where there is nothing in par
t.cular TO do. and they say two or three
words to kill the time. IN y
Graphic.
-Doctor-What ais you, sirp Pa.
TENT don't know, doctor. / have
such buzzing sound in my ears all the
time. Would you like TO look at my
Doctor-No, never mind.
Bring your wife around some day. I'd
like to look at hers. = Yonkers Stdtes-
man
Magistrate young woman
says that your continued staring at her
annoyed her excessively. Prisoner-l
never Intentionally annoyed Il woman
in my life. your Honor. Magistrate
Then why did you stare at her SO per-
Prisoner-Because she is
pretty, and / couldn't help it Young
him go, judgc!-LJe.
Mrs. Anglomaniac Il can not tell |
you what treat it is to hear you talk |
You have been in England SO long that
every word you utter reminds Inc
Of the delightful lords and dukes !
used 10 meet. Returned tourist-Par-
don me, but England is the only coun'
try that did not visit. Mrs. Anglo
maniac Indeed! How very strange!
was sure you had unconsc' onsly ac-
quired the English vocal tones. Re-
turned tourist-No; it is only cold in
my head Glen Rose Falcon.