The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1887-06-09
The Merry Side
ronton is still boring for experience.

| John Sherman "cold?" Ask any Democrat
Portsmouth has struck on natural gas, and
quit.
The Presidential "outlook" is what Cleveland
is making.
"The New South" idea is to crowd the old
Confederacy forward.
The best "national drill" is the one that is
driven through a wheat field.
ga faith-cure revival is going on in Pitts
burgh." Twill end in smoke
Religion is viewed by many as commodity.
That's why they water their stock ofit
The boomer should be careful how he ''raises
the wind" 1t might get to be cyclone.
%.<
Mrs. Goodspeed's marriage contract was a
clear case of"husbanding her resources"
-
A school or church quarrel ia good deal like
| a dog with dead rat-can't tell when to let 60.
The ultimatum of the dude.-"You must be
both a drunkard and a liar. to be Republi-
can."
"There's difference between temperance and
prohibition!" !" So there is between a dude and
a mao.
'The Presid ent fishes with artificial bait"
pointed
Well, Democratic friends, you're in for it
again. John Sherman has gotten out that old
"bloody-shirt."
The next time there is National Drill, Ohio
should send company of dudes, with canes
and eyeglasses
We would mildly suggest to our young men
that the way to "boom" a town is to get the
doggeries out of 1t. q
Talent is certainly rewarded when baseball
player can get bigger salary than member
of the Legislature.
A colt may run, jump, play, and kick up
big dust-but it's the steady-going old horse
that does the pulling
-
Many a wearied small boy will heave sigh
of relief to hear that the churnirg at The Cream
cry is done by steam.
Connecticut has passed law stopping the
running of railroad trains on Sunday. This is
"Puritanic"-and right.
"The Dow Law has decreased the number of
doggeries in Toledo" No, sir, it is Nasby, pull
verizing the rum power.
Your neighbor may be a very good man, and
you not know it. And you may be very bad
man, and he may know it.
The teaching of oratory in our colleges is a
valuable branch of education. There's always
a demand for street peddlers.
Converse wants Thurman to run for Gov
ernor, and hopes Thurman wants him to run,"
is the way the Democrats view it.
Washington c. H. doggerries have been SELL
ing "ginger-a -ale." The Mayor has been giving
them an increased dose of ginger.
Private Dalzell is reported as saying that he
"quit in disgust" writing for the papers. The
papers did that some time before.
We have receiveda a paper from Boston, called
"The Prognostic Stargazer." 1t reads as though
illu minated by moonshine whisky.
-
A natural gas well will last, ON an average,
about eight years. This may be some consola-
ton to you when the bore comes around.
-
The young dudes of Vicksburg who couldn't
march with "niggers" in Washington, ought to
have seen their brave daddies about 1864.
-
Gen. R. E. Lee thought that on account of
of their habit Of obedience, the "niggers" woull
make as good soldiers as white Democrats.
80
If we are afraid of assisting some party by ad-
vocating the downfall of the liquor traffic, why
don't we down it, and help our own party?
-
A large part of the Democratic party got left
trying to get Office under Cleveland's Admins
tration. The rest of it will get left next year.
-
The Republicans of Gallia are wide awake.
At least we suppose so-more than thirty have
announced themselves as candidates for Office.
President Cleveland sent ten dollars as a
contribution to a monument to Gen. Grant.
They ought to have sent him back his change.
The New York Herald, speaking of Hon.
John Sherman's Illinois speech, asks: SIS the
war over?" No! The shooting has only stop
ped.
An exchange says "a Kentucky photographer
advertises to take photographs as quick as a
mule can kick And probably about as hard,
too.
read author among library patrons in Boston.
Beans and sentiment don't harmonic, as it
were.
The Solid South should secure Jeff. Davis
while they can. He may be gone, after while.
They ought TO stuff him and put him in dime
museum.
"When McGlynn breaks up the Catholic
Church |" exclaims an eastern paper The
Catholic Church is probably inquiring who
McGlynn is.
Ha! ave can't go ahead of public opinion
on the temperance question: Is that why we
try to hold public opinion back, and educate
it the other way?
"a saloon keeper is entitled to some credit
for paying his tax" Is q horse-thief respecta-
BILE because he pays toll for the stolen horse he
ride along the pike?
Henry George goes on the principle that "the
Lord meant all men to be equal" But he
didn't m AXE them that way. Some are bigger
demagogues than others.
The conduct of the Southern frauds in WASH
ington, show that in the "South sab, col
ored man is still "a niggah," and cannot be
considered anything else.
Blaine is going to get out of the country. But
that won't save him. We shall expect to read
the interviews of the truthful reporters with
him, from day to day, just the same.
The President and Lamont caught two hun
dred trout, the largest weighing nearly half
pound" is the news from Saranac Lake. Cap
tured some boys minnow bucket, perhaps.
-.
The United Presbyterians in Conference de-
ciGed that the organ must remain in church
worship. So the sad-eyed old brother who de-
sires to hear the rustic of his wings, must hire
hall.
at Jacksonville, Florida, the Blue and Gray
united in decorating graves. They often united
in burying their dead-but one side was always
dead patriots, and the other side always dead