The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1887-07-28
Gbistlfs.


ltps toe tsf Atafi rafN. ~ n psi otcihff
!. ibe i.sps, ninth day 81 February.
"A isse .ilhos, brsls, ffe4serily BE-
The moot inposisg besdstors vbeD be
dead.
WAY mao bsosx bis dog. bat ntrsl.
.hoas bic ben. Ia. never teen prscisel.
aetermipei
- The snnmsr i,osrder vbo tried '
MIA ticsins COZ. les. season sH'i ssr
soas 70 40 iato The couSiry shis yesr
-~Oiss ne 20 oenss and III tell youl
ious1s." ''sLurt. AZ II bad % oeais
ihs, .osla be fonure enough
A MARYLAND LADY defends bsrself iol
,hs size Of her beetle by saying that .h'
lent rssponsble ior .ks, goes 90 behind
bef bach
When the uonsn of scripture turned
10 salt. her Isoi sss not happy one, He
$50 aaissrable nptl be secured him iresb
wife.
no, he able 10 tell uben qua Is loaded
n be aosi kpos be ought 10 ask souebo
dy, OF else let guns alone.
- The moot stfiictej part Of the house
Is tue ~indow. II 10 full OF palms; aud
who has nos seen more than one ~indos
bliadg
--Tennysou il III With goat II Is APP
pretended that be caught II from some Of
has recen. poetry. vbose lameness is thus
accounted Tor.
After running lawn mover for an
hour this morning be remarked that II
ever be had ssid anything derogstory or
unkind Of the snow shovel he would most
willingly take IL back.
--0ae Arm 10 Newark. N. j., makes
lJJ.000.0o0 corkscrews 10 year. We
don't know the object OF corkscrew, but
the Newark firm appears TO be engaged in
= very crooked" business
"A Canadian has shot 40 American sew.
ing machine agent; but shooting only one
American sewing machine agent won't set
tie the fishery trouble.
Il msa VAS recently brought to New
York hospital with eight OF bis ribs brok-
en-. The physicians hold out but little
encouragement that be eau ever umpire
another game.
Her mother Hes brute. my dear.
but don't cry. gave you to him because
he said be knew the secre, Of making you
happy" Daughter well. he's kept his
secret admirably"
"A possible tenant inquiries about cot
tsge to rent. and inquiries about the quail
ity Of the cir. THE Air!" cries the land
lord, 'the cir is wonderful. Doe becomes
= centenarian quicker here than anywhere
--''Oh, Mr.. Lighthead." remarked Miss
0ldgirl, with simper. 1--WE seen just
eighteen hsppy summers to-day" 'Only
eishieen happy ones, replied he, with pity
in his tone. "Wha, al unhappy life you
must have had"
-"lt Is said 20 one Is allowed 10 speak
when dining with the queen Of England"
This is decidedly announcement What is
\ fellow TO do when be wants another piece
81 pieG Perhaps be Is obliged TO "Wbistle
Tor it,"
--'Oh. my friends, there are some
Ipectaeles that one never iorgetsl' said
lecturer, after giving graphic description
II q terrible accident which be had wit
iessei. I'D like to know where they
'eli en-. remarked an old lady in the
audience who is always mislsying her
glasses.
"A three year old boy. who. afflicted
probably by the hot weather. had been
ross and fretfnl ell day, was asked rather
harply by bis mother, whats the mat
ery' Il want II TO snow, - was the child's
'rompt reply,
Mrs. Waldo tof Boston, --"I have q
ei.er from your Uncle James, Penelope.
tho wants US 10 spend the summer on his
arm" Penelope tdubiously) Els there
ny society 10 the neis hborhoodY" MIS-
Valdo-"I'vs heard him speak OF the
loisteins and the Guernseys. presume
hey ,sre pleasant people"
Summer tourist TO landlorj) DO you
How dogs 10 your hotel? Landlord =
es. sir, bring all the dogs you want TO
ummer urist--l'll have to 20 somew here =
lse. ! cant stand dogs Another SUN
,er tourist-Do you allow dogs 10 the
o,eI' L,odiord- No, sir: won't have
OF sbont the place. Tourist sorry.
Iy wife has dog thu, she thinks more oil
ian she does OF me.
The two celebrated preachers, Rev
r. Bacon aud Rev. Henry Ward Beecher,
ere once dispu.ing on some religious
inject. when the former accused the lat.
9 Of using wit 10 his sermons "Wel," =
I'D Mr.. Beeeher, suppose il had pleased = :.
cd to give you VIII what would you have =
,aey"
--cisiEsa --"Hsvent you got aoy rsls-
res u sllr' Tramp-"Yes sir; have
'e. but be 10 distant relative" who :.
thstf" "I,'s brother. Sir" "weii, A.
N don't call . brother distant relative, :
Jour" why, yes. Sir; you see hes
I'D. Sir
Turning 10 the post-ofiice clerk Who
d Just sold him stamp. aud smiling in
idiotic var, be asked: "Do you under.
md The language Of stAmpsf" YES"
spondei The man. placed 10 any place
oep, the right hand corner means 4 am
fool"