Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1887-07-19

| ana ieaVeS us empty as q last
| Years oyster can!
| Thou pictured saint Thou actual flendi
Thou enemy to all mankindl
| Doggone you'll
Thus might go on, Mr.. Editor, since my
dander is up. but won't occupy too much OF
your valuable space.
| I thought l had a good joke on Mandy
about the Monte Carlo Missionary society,
Saint Roulette, the Casino chapple, and all
that sort Of trash; and had, but when she
discovered my duplicity-what word that
n, Mr. Edtor!-I became a changed man.
OF course the first evening had an engage
ment with the American minister, and slip
| ping out early followed the instructions !
had got that night from the boys in Paris.
and went straight for the Casino. I was
showed right into the Sal de Jue, as they call
the big room where the playing takes place.
and the elegant surroundins almost took nv
breath. They ran four or five roulette tables
| and one "30-4U' game, but didn't bother with
that. Roulette is as easy as fain' off log. and
l watched the men and women playin' till
| got the run, aud then a good lookn' female
| approached me and began to talk to me in
| some foreign lingo that sounded more like the
| bin of fares had been studyin' for a week
than anything else, and I concluded it was
| French.
"Parly voo," says to her, with one OF my
| smiles.
awe, mussier," she says back, and went
right ahead making sines and jabbering away
till set down at the table and put dollar
| on number. That dollar went out of site
in minute, and began to hedge Half an
hour later l was strapped fat and was irwin
to borrow from the French lady, but she
couldn't understand my English till / asst
her to walk out to the caffay and have a
saucer or ice cream, and she went with me.
was wonderful how it was goin' to be paid
for, and also coolin' my heated brow in the
perfuined breezes from the sea and shore.
when l heerd dress skirt rattlin' behind me
and well known voice addressed me:
"Mr Waxem," it said with a cold glitter.
"will you introduce me to the American min
ister?"
Is it needcessary for me to say it was
Mandy, and the only American minister was
| the French lady, that I didn't know from a
sue OF sole leathers think you will say it is
not.
But thought was equal to the occasion
| so braced up.
CAB, my DEAR" says very pleasant
almost hilarious, lis that you? So glad Won
air here. This indy is the minister's wife
and winked at her to keen her mouth shnt
md not give me away.
But it was no 60 She began her Internal
French jabber again, and the next minute
had to grab Mandy and hurry her away to
prevent scene. Women never know how To
suppress their feelings on important occasions,
and that's one reason they amt fit for politics
and craftsmanship
When I got Mandy out in the suburbs I
tried to explain the situation to her by telling
her l met the lady in the Sal de Jue, and, bein'
q stranger. she had kindly volunteered to act
as my guide and interpreter, but it wasn't
any use.
"Bash Waxem," she says to me, "you may
think you can fool me, but Urope amt Wash
inton, ID. G., and your Madelain Agleezes
and your Sal de JUGS amt a patchin' to
Mandy Waxem. I amt so green as you think
l am, and I know all about your Casino
chapple, and your Saint Rou lette, and your
missionary society. watched you go in
there, and followed, and seen you gamblin',
and now all the money you've got is in my
trunk, and I'm going to keep it there till we
land in Way back. You come right back to
the tavern with me, and when you git out
from under my thumb agin you " ill know it,
She kept this kind Of talk up half the night,
and when l sunk into an uneasy doze heard
it still like the distant growlin OF an angry
and ruffled nightmare. We staid in Monte
Carlo two nights, but there was nothing in il
for me- ] could hear the fun, and see where
it was goin' on, but that was all, and didn't
even git chance to win back what lost tn,
fust night. ~.
Ell this keeps up I'm afeerd my trip tc
Urope will be a failure.
Monte Carlo is such a popular place, too
New Workers and Englishmen keep it up.
and the prince Of Wales goes there and sit.
right down with the crowd and does his sheer
One night last winter he put 100 francs on
number, and it come up in the wheel, and the
prince got $500 francs on his investment
But he didn't keep it, like most men would.
He divided it up among everybody at the
table, and then they all prayed that the
prince would be lucky every time 1t would
have been savin grace to me eff he had been
there the night l was. But he wasn't.
Mandy was there instid. / seen one. little
German that had won 400, 900 francs, but he
wasn't satisfied with that, and when he quit
he had lost 500,0 Some men, think, air
natural born fools Mandy says she thinks
that's the kind of man l am, but Mandy's
Judgment is liable TO be erratic at times
as*
Mr.. Editor, write you this letter from a
convent near Genoa, where Mandy has took
me for repairs She wouldn't let me stop in
side the French boundary, and only got her
to stop hero because Christopher Columbus
was born in this mel hborhood, and she |
knowed that q representative citizen of
Ameiiky that would stand a good deal would |
raise righteous Indignation il force was
used to keep him from visiting the birthplace |
of the discoverer of the new land of prom !
mis-, the blazer of the path of lbberty, so to |
speak, the patron saint Of the greatest and |
grandest republic on Gods green earth.
Mandy amt tyrant, exackly, but she has |
always had a predudis against France and |
French customs, and ought to have knowed |
better than to provoke her twice on the same
sile when she was already provoked on gen.
eral principles.
line in state Of siege or quarantine or some
thing Of that kind, and am restricted Of my
liberties, but take my word for it, no CON
gresham OF experience amt going to let his
wife lead him round by the nose very long Of
there's any mild and harmless excitement lay
ing around loose, and there is, Mr.. Editor, in
all these foreign lands.
hope my next letter will be more descri,,-