Huntsville gazette., 1887-10-22
A UNIQUE PETITION.
The Brilliant Effort of Young Kansas
City Attorney.

! A~uoAe Va ~ IVuuS haHsAS
| City Attorney.
The Kansas City Journal publishes d.
Force petition drawn by a young legal
light of that city and on file in the court
records, from which the following is
taken:
That during their married life the de-
fendant has exhibited such dangerous
traits OK character, such violent passion,
and such an entire abandoned of her duties
ana obligations as the wife of plaintiff,
expressing deep and unalterable hatred of
piaIntiif, attacking him with tubs, broom
sticks, hatchets and whatever else she
/ could find convenient to lay her hands
| upon, occasionally interrupting the pan
tomme by introducing few adjectives,
now English and then German, as best
suited the fury of the star actress in this
! orama or real life, SO that, having all these
long, weary years borne the burden of the
storm and tempest's rage, he (the plaint-
M being by the defendant directed to
leave the house-hs house-with more
than common every day emphasis, which
simply means that the defendant being
woman of large and masculine pro-
portions, with dauntless courage, with a
Jaw mlghtier than the tabled one that
slew the Philistines, aided and abetted by
the demon alcohol, with q great wood axe
+ IN her hand, to try the force and efficiency
Of which she began the work of destruc-
tlon, in the presence OF the awe stricken
plaintiff, by cutting, breaking, and de-
inolishing the plaintiff . piano, for which
he had paid nine hundred dollars, as
though it were leafless tree in the wide.
wide forest; then, like q terror inspiring
Ajax, the huge German matron stood ply
ing her work of devastation, beginning on
the beautiful rosewood instrument Of
seven octaves, proceeding to the hand
some writing desk, her murcury rises to
the highest pitch when, with her brawny
lists, she shattered the face Of the tall,
line mirror which will never more reflect
the sweet and amiable countenance Of de-
fendant. Having nowhere else to look
for material to butcher, she turned like an
executioner upon the plaintiff, who all
This while had been silent spectator Of
the scene of havoc, pondering upon the
Immortality of the soul, and ordering if
in that far-of land "woman il the vine
and man the oak" But when he caught
glance from her eye and
Thought that he could see to
the end of life he stood not upon
the order Of his going, but quietly
'1diooSou, moving DflSkly, ne picked mp
his trunk, and, leaving his cross behind
him in possession OF the house, furniture
and home (alas! what home y, and turn
ing his face and steps toward the setting
sun, he has never gone back to learn what
his aforesaid wife has done with his $500
worth Of personal property he left behind
him, and, with the permission OF the court,
he never will. And the plaintiff further
says he always thought the bee was hiveSi
for his honey, the sheep kept for his fleece.
the OK wrought for his profit the fowl
plumed for his feathers, the tree grated to
bring forth fruit, and the earth titled to
grow corn, but all the labor and cost he
has bestowed on the defendant during
nine years are cast away, and, if he could
persuade her to kiss as friends in the
morning, before noon she would be ready
to throw the house out of the window, and
he has never received the slightest reward
for ell his pains; therefore, lest the de-
fendant might feel at liberty to use plain
tiff as a feet ball or cuspidor, he makes
the prayer hereinafter following, which is
that he may be absolutely and forever
divorced from aer, Internationally and
without any legal or mental reservation.