The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-10-25
BRIGHT BITS.

THE woman who shows her love of admira-
ion has not been spoiled by fiattery. Only the
spoiled girls take It as matter of COURSE
PhHddetphtd CdU
DIN your husband see his picture we printed
last Sunday" asked the editor
Yes, he saw il "
Just gave It cursory glance, suppose?"
NO, sir; he gave il a cursory swear word. -
UdshangtofL critic.
WE HEARD the other day of a Nebraska man
who breaks stones with his fist. This is Just the
sort of man who skedaddles for the foothills
whenever there is prospect of meeting an I'M
dersized, left-handed sheriff or an effeminate
tax COLLECTOR Burlington Free Press.
SOCIETY WOMEN in st. Paul wouldn't serve on
a committee to receive the President with Sena
tor Davis wife. because she was a SeamstreSs
before her marriage. Sew That's a pretty
kind of bias to show in a republic, and it illus
trates the Seamy side of society.-LOtCeU Citi-
zen.
The Philadelphia North American says that
insurance Agent Adams has been waiting for
ntteen Years tor-a letter which has just reached
him." The sender must have Inadvertently put
one of the immediate delivery stamps on the let
ter, but 1t doesn I seem fifteen years since such
stamps were introduced oTristotcm Herald.
A CAUTIOUS ANALYsIs.-'I have letter of in.
PRODUCTION to Mr. Samuel Slump said a
stranger in Western town to a citizen Can
you tell me il he is a man of drinking habitss"
wall, stranger" replied the citizen expector-
that Sam is hard drnker, but reckon if you
ask him TO go an take suthin you won't have
to build fire under him to git him started -
It'd Bits.
JUST FEEBLE ENOUGH. Smith-You look a lit
tie muSsed up Brown.
Brown should say so! I've Just had a row
with my mother n-aw, and I'll be hanged if she
didn't put me out of the house. The house be-
longs to her you know.
Smith-You told me day or two ago that
your mother-in-law was very feeble.
Brown--I meant feeble for her.-HarperS
Magazine.
AN AMERICAN joke sometimes loses itself
through translation into another language A
native hmnorist wrote: Notwithstanding that
lady should always be quiet and self-contained
she cannot even enter place of worship with
out tremendous hustle" A French writer re-
produces 1t in this form: According to an
American author, the ladies of that country are
so greedy of notoriety that they cannot enter
the holy sanctuary without disturbing the kneel-
ing worshlppers with their vulgar and unseemly
ado. -BtnghGBltOn Republican.
ONE cannot help plying the unfortunate
Frenchmen who are obliged to buy their deco
rations In this country no Caffarel could make
living in selling medals and ribbons All one
has to do here is to join rife team and shoot a
hole in n barn door OF twelve paces or get
elected to the Common Council. PERHAPS how.
ever, someone will retort that in the latter case
the medal is got by purchase. But such sug-
gestion is not only unwarranted, it is ungeneT-
GUS Common Councilmen are invariably chosen
spontaneously We know, because we have
heard them say so themselves.-Boston Tran
script
APPLICANT for work-Do you want to employ
any more help sir?
Proprietor-Yes believe we are a little short
handed. Are you sure you understand the bust
ness?
Applicant ought to- I've worked at it for
twenty years and can bring you recommends
tons from every man l ever worked for
PropretOr-Can't YOU come in again? The
office boy is out just now, and the porter and
the private Waterman are holding labor meet
ing. I'll state your case to them when they are
disengaged, and if they are willing shall be
glad to hire you. But I'll tell you frankly that
though may be able to get the consent of the
private Waterman and the porter, I'm some
particular However, it'll do no harm to call
again.-BOston Transcript.