The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-12-26
BRIGHT BITS.

Or seeing house being whitewashed, q small
boy OF 5 wanted 70 know if it was going to be
shayed-EncscR9e
WE don't care for the rain" said one Balti-
more glrl 10 another as she raised an umbrella;
we're Beither sugar nor salt"
No replied the other; but we're lasses. "
HoFpeT's Basor.
''wHERE is your homer asked a man of dis
consulate looking stranger.
j haven't any home at present, was the
reply. Ny wife's mother is making her
visit "-Soserrsils Journal.
TEAcHEa-Mr Bagster, can you give prac-
teal instance of the virtue of self-denial?
Bagster--Yes, sir; man can hear snake
storr without ringing in something about
vhiSky.-BtuliHgtoH Free Press,
ST. PAU. MIN, claims to have spent Sill
oon.to in building this year Minneapolis,
which held her claim back to see what st, Paul
had to stay. spent Sill ,000,500, as nearly as can
be estinated-Pittsburg Chronicle.
''YorR bill has been running a long time" in
sinuatingly remarked the butcher TO Slopay the
other morning.
That's bad" remarked Slopay, sympathet-
ically, why don't you let it walk?''- 'dShin9-
ton Critic
A LITTLE CAss AVENUE GIRL came home from
church greatly troubled over the bottomiess
pit. After awhile she cheered up, saying: Il
didn't think of it before, but if the bottom of
the pit is out could get out on the other side,
couldn't I!"-Detroit Tribune.
ON DAY Julia Ward Howe was introduced to
Sitting Bull by that full name and the gentle
man remarked. How, with his usual urbanty.
"Ah"' said Mrs. Howe. with quick apprehen-
sion. The gentleman has heard of me- ! see.
He is really very intelligent aborigine." y
Judge.
You seem to be enjoying yourself, Bobby, "
remarked one of the guests at dinner party.
Yes. asserted Bobby. with his mouth full.
II am maxim the most of it, cause after pa an
ma give big dinner like this it's always cold
10. I'M for ha vt y HffrJl =
Bdz0r.
"WosE, deah, tell me-ah-dd you make a
mem )wandunl of the-ah-wemark l made to
you when was here befoah.
mo, Charley, I didn't
That's dweadful. cause, dom yer know, l
cawp't wecollect myself whether pwoposed to
you or Clawa. Whitehall Times.
LADY Ito husbandl-You don't tell me-, John,
that eleven cities were overhown. ana millions
of people left homeless and starving!
Husband-Yes, in China.
Lady (disappointed)-Oh in China. Interest
| ing matters of that kind always happen such a
provokingly long distance away!-Netc York
Sun.
JoNEs-You seem to be always miserable
Smith-So am. Life has no pleasures for
what is the NATTER
ANXIETY about my future robs me of one
| half of present joy, and remorse for my past
| life gets away with the other alf."-Teras
| S filings,
| JOHNNIE, bright boy of 6 years, while being
fixed up for school, observing his little overcoat
much the worse for wear, and having more
| nended places than he admired, turned quickly
| to his mother and asked:
Ma is pa richY'
Yes, very rich, Johnnie; he is worth two
| millions and half"
What in, maf'
.'Oh, he values you at one million. me at one
| MILL n. and baby at half million"
| johnnie, after thinking moment said: INA,
| tell papa to sell the baby and buy rs some
clothes, "-Boston Globe.
'AIL l have to say observed the hard
/ featured passenger. bringing his fist down en-
| phaticaly on his knee and talking loudly while
| the filling up, sis that when l have
| bought my ticket and paid for II and taken my
seat in the car, that seat is mine and there ism
| any obligation resting on me, morally, legally
or otherwise to get up and give it to any woman
| on the globe. healthy woman can stand up
in q crowded car Just as well as can There is
no reason under the sun why here, Miss. take
my seat; had not noticed that any ladies We're
! standing up. Confound you" he exclaimed,
| giaring fiercely at the men about him, ARE
! there no gentlemen among you? Don't you see
these ladies' have no seatsg"-ChicGOo Tribune.