St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1887-12-31
MESSED WITH TWO MOUTHS.
Yet the Ladies Do Not Love Him
for That---A New York Freak.

They have got twO-mOuthed man up
in the Bovery, says the New York
Times. He is a blonde young man.,
with smooth face and sort of a
sewer-gas expression, who sits on a
PLATFORM. drinks water with one
mouth and simultaneously smokes
a, cigarette " with. the o- otter.
and does various other small duets for
the delectation of the mob. His upper
mouth is in the fashionable location,
and constitutes medium sized aper-
ture Immediately under his nose and
Immediately over his chin. His other
one is underneath his chin. The lower
one is not good for much, as he has had
brass lips fitted to it, and the twO-headed
cow, WHO feltquite badly when he came,
has become reconciled after watching
his performances.
Otto Tolpefer is the man. In talk
with him yesterday Otto did not ex-
hibit that satisfaction over his unusual
blessings that one might expect. He
said he was born that way and couldn't
help it. His folks were poor, and he
supposed it was sort of cODgenitai Sar-
caSm on his parents, who already had
more mouths to fill than the lalder was
equal to. When Otto talks he uses his
upper mouth and shuts the lower one
with his finger. This gives him sort
Of tiageOlet manner that is trying. 1t
seems as if he were playing converse
tional tunes on himself. The luxurious
viSt4 of ecstasies injured up by the
idea of two mouths Otto does not fulfill.
He cannot eat, except with the upper
one, and he cannot talk very well with
either. Unless he stops up the lower
nl- I,a &c To- foil 60
whiStling accomplishment. This
does not take place because the lower
one is Jealous, but because the lower one
cannot help it. Moreover, the leak in
his tracheal bellows gives his voice a
strange and unreal whispering sound
like that of sexton at funeral. In
stead of having the fair sex at his feet,
as might ignOrantly be expected, Otto is
a lonesome bachelor. That kissing ten
dency which Darwin observed through
all the scale of organic evolution. Begin
ming with the sunbeamS that kiss the
sea. is discOverable in quite number of
OttO's friends OF the feminine gender,
but still they do not adore him. When
ever, in the process of cOurtShip, he has
kissed anybody with his upper mouth
his lower one has whiStled. This inter-
ruptiOn appears to be awkward and I'M
popular. Ills StCOlu luOulll, III ldct.
keeps close and enviOus watch on his
first, and the sentimental bugle call
spoils all his tender plans. He is re-
signed, however, land now uses it simply
to smoke cigarettes with and play on
kind of squeeze, which combines the
neurologic effect of the mouth harminica
with slow and lingering death by the
accordion.
Otto is not a pleasant object to gaze at
excessively, and as wall decoration he
would not succeed. The brass cap on
the unnecessary aperture in his wind
pipe gives him sort of Frankenstein
look, and conveys the idea of chamOis-
skin lungs and moroccO-leather heart.
lie does not look at all happy, and in
comparison with him the armless wOn-
der. as he passes forkload of fried pO-
tatoes to his mouth by aid of the first
and second toes of his right foot, is
thing of beauty and joy tor quite
while.