The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1887-12-24

saf upcu a wretched couch and
ldeEinxly heayenward.
HerRos one Of those unfortunate creatures
whom nature had endowed with refined SEN
abilities and the super-sensltive sympathies
which nay only Be expressed In verse;
One amer another Of his illusions had he
completed and sent abroad TO the sanctum
Argus. only 70 have them returned to him-if
hsincloesd stamps for that purpose until one
might think that the return Q. MSS. had be-
pme such an usual affair that he would
adjust himself TO II somewhat.
But no-he thought a. much of these chill
dren OF his brain as the more successful ex-
amples Of literary parentaga Indeed, more,
for our MAIN and cripple enlist the af-
fcctions to greater degree than the hale and
hearty.
He had pawned all the available articles in
his possession, and would have parted with
his coat in the same manner, had there not
been several disheartening objections to such
proceeding, foremost among which were
the liabilities to arrest for parading the
streets in his shirtsleeves, and the certainty
OF exposing to the jecring crowd the Sc
dentary portion Of his trousers which con-
tinual use had abraded into the shred and
ravel of destruction.
AS l said, he was gazing heavenward-
this proceeding was possible from the fact
that he dwelt directly beneath the skylight.
Very likely he had determined that IL there
was no other way Of splicing his verses with
the attic flavor, he meant to see what virtue
there was In proximity to raiter and sky
light.
Still he drew the small table toward him,
and gazed at a sheet of paper spread thereon.
'I,ct me see,v he said, what II was the
stranger gave me-"
AS he had left an unapprecative sanctum,
that morning. he was accosted by veneer
able stranger who had been present during
that painful interview consequent upon re-
/ lection of MSS.
Young man. he said genius is not APP
preciated, i perceive. Now, If you will de-
scend from the clouds and undertake little
matter for me that has a mundane char
acter, l believe you will make more by
few happy lines than you ever dreamed
possible. Take thispaper home with you and
examine II closely. Write me few lines
in praise of the subject you find therein, and
the result will be advantageous to yourself. y
And IL was this paper at which the poet
gazed "Ah WE'LL" he said. "whst must
be, must be- and with this philosophical
reflection he began:
"Once fellow named Maenus McGifiy,
Nearly turned from his pain to a stiffy;
Till the twinge and the rack
Were released from his back,
For st. Jacobs Oil cures In a jiffy.
/ t.yr>t - III. 4 A..
measure, that will answer for beginning
by the bye. the stranger gave me a bottle Of
the mixture. I'll place 1t upon the table
before me; II may serve as an inspiration" "
After contemplating the label attentively
for . few moments, he ran his fingers
through his luxuriant hair, in the manner
of versifcrs, and AZ result Of the friction
dashed off the following:
"Once fellow who trod upon peels,
Tired to walk In the air with his heels,
But the pain when he dropped
Some st. Jacobs Oil stopped,
So he don't have to stand for his meals.
Nov, II mistake not,p he said, THAT
last eftusion has dashing air aboutit Now
let me see what can do that has clever
classic cast--ah there Clever classic cast il
good. Now for verse that will measure tc
the ALTERATION.
Cried the scholar, Hoe pain est nefandum !;
Till st. Jacobs OIL Bonus Jim Dandum-
Turned Its malus rigorem
Into bonus vigorcm.
So say Quod erat demonstrandum."
Bang. bang Somebody knocks ct the
street door.
"Itis his crusty nibs, the landlord, coming
for his rent, and haven't blessed penny
about me. Haste. o muse. before the cur
rent OF my thought Is turned aside by his
gross presence. Here we go:
"Once acrank-sided chap. named O'Toole
Got too near the butt end of mule
Till st. Jacobs provided
Ease, where he collidcd;
So he wasn't completely fool.
"Hol he has entered. hear his plcbeian
feet ascending the stairs below with painful
distinctness Pay or COL know his ex
acting phrase. All inspiration
"Once a larking, facetious young cub
Made Shakspearcan pun at his club;
If you're after relief
For rhenmatical grief,
st. Jacobs Oil--ayc, there's the rub
lie has reached the second laudng-f hear
ais grumble. lie must beintoxcated for ~