davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15


After DumpseY had wore a pair of ne "
shoes for four dogs he went out to the ash
heap and resurrected his old ones. When
his wife asked him what he was going TO
do he replied savagely, that he was "golng
TO get on peace footing again"
--De-Mrs. Snooks is a beauty, isn't
she?
Popinjay-Well, yes-rather.
De Smlth-What do yon consider her
most striking featurep
Polnjay-Her tongue; 1t hits terribly
hard.
-"Farep exclaimed a conductor on a
Lincoln avenue car, leaning toward a
grizzled old man as the car came out of a
switch" at Indiana street.
why gave you my fare ON the bridge"
said the old man. 81 got on there"
"No one got on at the bridge but a little
boy" said the conductor.
~ know It," persisted the old man. 81
am that little boy"
The guido leads couple to the brink
of a frightful preeipice, and then says in a
mournful tone: 81 brought a gentleman
and his wife here last year. The lady
leaned oyer too far and disappeared. The
gentleman said IL was Of the finest Views
he had eyer seen
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15
Ia consnm ption Incurahlsi

Read the following Mr.. Z. II. Morris
Newark, Ark, says: "Was down with Alb.
cess of Lungs, and friends and physicians
pronounced me an Incurable Consumptive.
Aegean taking DR.. Kings New Disco, cry
for Consumption, am now on my third bottle,
and able to oversee the work on my farm.
1t is the finest medicine ever made"
Jesse Middlewart, Decatur, Ohio, says:
"Had it not been for DIR. Kings New Dis
covery for Consumption would have died
Of Luug Troubles. Was given up by doc
tors. Am now in best of health Try
it.
Trial bottles of that Great Discovery for
Consumption free at T. D. Thomas Drug
Store.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15
In Brief, and to - Point.

Dyspepsia is dreadful. Disordered liver
is misery. lndigestions foeia to good ma
ture.
The human digestive apparatus is one
of the most complicated and wonderful
things in existence. 1t is easily put ont OF
order.
Greasy food, tough food, sloppy food, bad
cookery, mental worry, late hours, irregular
habits, and many other things which
ought not to be, have made the American
people nation of dyspepiics
But Green's August Flower has done a
wonderful work in reforming this sad busi-
ness and making the American people so
happy that they can enjoy their meals and
be happy.
Remember:-No happiness without health.
But Green's August Flower brings health
and happiness to the dyspeptic Ask your
druggist for bottle Seventy-fve cents.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15

The Saxons are very polite, so over
polite that they not infrequently bring down
ridicule upon themselves. It used TO be
told in Dresden that a stranger in the city
was one day crossing the bridge that spans
the Elbe, and asked native to be directedd
to certain church which he wished to
find.
-"Haye you seen Mr.. Mushbrain latelyP"
asked the fair girl languldly of her gallant
companion, young Tennlsbat of the Bank
mot for ages" lisped the youth.
81 understand he has made inesallI-
ance," said the weary beauty.
II should like to see it," said Tennisbat
with shade of animation. 81 used to
potter about my fathers park at home and
am somewhat Of mechanic myself"
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15

Signs of snow. signs of ram, signs of
everything except a deluge of dollars from
delinnuedt subscribers.
Shiloh's Catarrh Remedy positive cure
for Catarrh. Diphtheria and Canker Mouth.
sol sold by DIR. Horn, Lehighton, and Biery.
Weissport.
Nothing is so pleasing as to have
large man thump you In the left lung to
emphasize an argument. The foundation
OF many an everlasting hatred has been
laid In that wav.
The Rev. Geo. II. Thayer, of Bourbon
IND, says Roth myself and wife owe our
lives to Shiloh's Consumption Cure" Sold
oy Dr. Horn, Lehighton, and Biery, Weiss
port
Fired, three wear yld and his baby sister
were 10 nave drink of water. Fred reached
Tor the glass, saving: "Et me have Itfrss."
put mamma said. "No, little girls alway
nrst'" Sir Fred replied, mol gentlemen
firss. They're just as sIrsty as girlsP'
Are you made miserable by Indigestion
Constipation, Dizziness, Loss of Annette
Yellow Skin? Shiloh's Vitilizer is positive
cure. Sold by DIR. Horn, Lshighton, and
Biery, Weissport
PA, will you answer me a question:,
Certainly, my boy" Well, pa, is the
world roundT eyes, of course" "Weu
then. II The world is round, how can II
come to an endP' "There, now, that'll do,
you can run out and play"
Why will you cough when Shiloh's Cure
wlllgive immediate relief. Price 10 cts.
oO cts and VI. Sold by DIR. Horn, Lehih
ton, and Biery, Weissport.
Little Tommy Ray had quarreled with
his sister, and would not kiss and be
friends. His aunt said, "Oh, don't Won
remember what papa read at family-prayers,
this incoming, that we were 10 forgive
seventy times seYenS" "Yes," replied
Tommy, "but tickerlarly noticed 1t was
TO your brother, not sister.
Pimples,boils and other humors are liable
to appear when the blood gets heated. To
cure them, take Hoods Sarsaparllla.
Bridget, you are never in the kitchen
when l want you. How is ltp 'sSure,
mum. it's for the raison there's no tellIn'
when you're a-wantln' me-"
Kansas City Man: suppose you've
never been in Kansas City, have your
Omaha Man; was there last week.
Last week. Oh, you ought to see IL
nowl
Mine Booster; II tell You It's the one
Of the biggest mines In Nevada. I'm sure
that you will invest after I've shown you a
few P'ints." Cautious Old Granger; ''Pd
re Osonsee some 1.-THE quartz"
Ma" said Berthe, "should l say
pants or 'trowsersp'" ''Trowsers, INV
dear" said the mother. "Well, then,n
said BERTHE, II think Bridget had better
give FiPo some water be trowsers aw
full"
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15
An Exper I: A patent medlclbe man,

AN Exper I: A patent medicine manu-
facturer died In New York last week. Be-
fore he died his friends asked him how he
would like to be buried. He had just
strength left TO say: "Insert me top col
umn' next to reading matter, SO times,
electro by mall" and then he closed his
eyes and passed away to that bourne where
there are no omissions or wrong insert
tioos.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15

-Stranger-Will you kindly direct me 10
the hall where the Anarchists meet,
Anarchlst-Yes, mine vrent, you will be
welcome.
"Thank you. am anxious to get there
as quick as possible.
'You too boil NIT wrath ven you dink of
desc dings. You make bombs, eh9"
"Oh, no.
"Vat you want NIT dot hall, eh?''
II am superintendent of a lunatic asylum
and am hunting for an escaped patient"
New York Girl-Oh, we can trace our
ancestry back hundreds of years. We are
descenants of one of the old North kings.
Omaha Girl-A vikingp
"Yes, that is what they were called"
"You mean the men who sailed big var
ships with skeletons for figureheads, and
raided the peaceful settlements further
south?"
eyes; but you must remember such
things were considered all right in those
days. The world had not progressed very
far"
IT understand that, dear course. BY the
way, your father is still living, isn't hep
"Oh, yes. He's New York immigration
commissioner"
-'Really, my dear sr,', said the Dres-
dener, bowling low, 81 grieve tosay il but
cannot tell YOU"
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15

-Sevral exchanges in othe placese hayr
alluded to the unprecedented divorce busl-
ness transacted in the Chicago courts last
Saturday. In SO doing they have done in
justice to the city. This may have been
unintentional. but 1t is none the less
grleyous. In almost every instance they
have spoken Of the number of divorce cases
as 100. Unless we are greatly mistaken
the actual number was 105. Fiat justitia.
Give us fair count.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15
An Important Element.

OF the success of Hoods Sarsaparilla is
the fact that every purchaser receives fair
equivalent for his money. The familiar
headline 100 Doses One Dollar" stolen by
imitators, is original with and true only Of
Hoods Sarsaparilla. This can easily be
proven by any one who desires to test the
matter. The real economy, buy only Hoods
Sold by all druggists.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15
AS WIZ CLIP 4 UMO ROCITIEO.

The.stranger passed on, little surprised
at this voluble answer to a simle question.
He had proceeded but few rods when he
heard footsteps behind him, and. turning,
saw the same man running TO catch up with
him. In moment his pursuer was by
his side, his breath nearly gone, but with
enough leftto say: "My dear ser. You asked
me how you could find the church. and Il
psined me to have to say that l did not
know. Jutt now | met nv brother and
asked him, but I grieve to say he did not
know either"
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15
haye been great suiIerer from cata,

haye been great sufferer from catarrh
Tor over ten years; had it very bad, could
hardly breathe. Some nights / could not
sleep-had to walk the floor. l purchased
Eiy's Cream Balm and am using Ii freely, il
is work cure surely. have advised sew
eral friends to use it with happy results in
every case. 1t is the one medicine above
all others made to cure catarrh, and it is
worth its weight in gold. I thank God /
have found remedy can use with safety
and that does all that is claimed for it. Il
is curing my deafness.-B. w, Sperry, Hart
ford, Coun.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15
parbYa ProdhYlaetIe Fluid.

Use it in every sick.-oom. VIII keep
the atmosphere pure and wholesome; re-
moving all bad odors from any source.
Will destroy all Disease Germs, infection
from all Fevers and all contagious disease.
The eminent physician, j. Mariou Sims,
of New York, says: ~ am convinced that
Prof. Darbys Prophylactic Fluid is a most
valulble disinfectant."
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15
or INTEREST TO FARMERS.
Delicious Desert

Whipped cream. This, one of the easiest
made deserts, frequently gives the good
housewife considerable Of unnecessary
trouble, the cause of which is that the
cream Is either too warm or too fresh
Cream skinned about noon from the pre-
vious evenings milk, which stood in a cold
spring all night, is generally cold enough
II not, place II for five or ten minutes on
little finely crushed ice sprinkled with salt
Then beat 1t briskly until 1t ls stiff enough
for a spoon to stand up in ii; add vanilla
6aYoring and sugar to taste II requires
but little sugar--two or three tablespoons
full to quart of whipped cream is sufficient.
A pint Of fresh cream makes quart Of
whipped cream. If it is not desired quite
so rich, or II the quantity Is not sufficient,
the whites Of two eggs beaten TO a stiff
froth may be added without the least injury
TO the quality of the desert, only it must
not be added unit the last moment before
serving the cream. Serve in a glass dish
not too deep, and arrange meringues around
the edges. This makes delicious, rich
desert, and, in the country. an economical
one.
Meringues. Beat the whites OF eight
eggs and one ponnd of granulated sugar to
a dry froth, Scoop out small tablespoon
fuls and slide them uniformly upon a fiat
baking tin which has been buttercd with
unsalted butter, or lightly creased over
with few drops of fine salad oil; place
them in cool oyen, only warm enough to
dry them. They will be of pale yellow
color throughout, perfectly dry and crisp,
and when cold melt upon the tongue; they
are served with whipped cream.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15
TO CONSUMPTIYES.

The undersigned having been re-
stored to health by simple means, after
suffering for several years with severe
lung affection, and that dread disease
Consumption, is anxious to make
known to his fellow sufferers the meara
of cure. To those who desire it, he will
cheerfully send free of charged a copy
of the prescription used, which they
wiz find sure cure for Consumption,
Asthma, Catarrh, Bronchitis and ell
throat and lung Maladies.
He hopes all sufferers will try his
Remedy, as it will cost them nothing
and may provea blessing. Those dor
string the prescription, will please ad,
dress, REV. howard A. WILSON,
williamsburg, Kings Co., New York.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15
ROCK tsLAFlD & PACIFIC R,Y

and ooninuous lines terminal
ROCK Chicago
daherty
kSmsss City in ad Aehao9 ansa Albert
OF finter ate tnnuns ndrIlar
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15

WIT can live at home, and make more money
tIIII at work for us than at anything else in
80 the world. Capital not needed you arc
started free. Both sexes; all ages. Any one eau
do the work. Larg earnings sure from first star {.
Costly outfit and terms free. Better not delay,
Costs you nothing to send us your address and
and out; II you are wise you will do so at on.
HALiErr a. Co, Portland, Maine. decIs ~
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15
THE GREAT ROCK ISLAND ROUTE

Thoroughly baested
h shuInans
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15

a GENTLEMAN. aa,d3 having Z, bssa Ssa,.,
vous Prostration, Seminal Weakness,
Premature Decay, and all the evil Ell.
fects of early indiscretion and youthfrl
folly, is anxious to make known To
others the simple mode of self-cure. To
those who wish and will give him the:H
symptoms, he will send Qree) by rev
turn mail q copy of the recipe SO suo-
cessfully used in his case.
Address in confidence, JAMES We
PINFNEY, AZ Cedar St.. N. Y.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-10-15
THE FAMOUS ALRERT LA ROurE

UTbE FAWuOOc AEaEEK
wheat helds
nk
1ossR An eaVen"ortn Kansas C5 minneapolis St. Paul and inter
For Maps principal
United States and canada-or desired information
r. r. CABLE, e. John, E. A. HOLBROOK
h't esi Ag Chicago Asst esar Mgs cheg e Tkt Pass Chicago
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1887-05-27

SPRINGFIELD, Ills, May 27-The senate
read the revenue bill the third time Thursday
and then passed it, Other bills passed were
as follows: The general appropriation bill;
appropriating 5000 10 John A Lyle, who
lost his arms firing a salute; to prevent aban
donment of children; providing for an indus
trial home for the blind at Chicago
committee was appointed to investigat.
alleged mstreatment of a patient at the Anna
insane asylum. The house passed a reso-
luton providing for adjournment from
Friday until Tuesday owing to Decoration
Day, and the following bills were passed
Prohibiting pool selling except on race
courses; giving the printing commissioners
power to annul contracts obtained by collu
sion or combination; appropriating s27 900 tc
Chicago milkmen for keeping stock during
the pleuro pneumonia quarantine last year.
committee was appointed to investigate the
cause of the death of Balus Peadro at Anns
asylum. The penitentiary and reform schoo
bills were sent to third reading after raisin,
the limit of appropriation to $500, 900, ans
consolidating the commissions of both pen
itentiaries
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1887-05-27
The City Of Rock Island.

Rock Island is a city OF Is 900 inhabitants, stu
ated at the geographical center of the Middle
States in the midst of the richest grain producing
section of the world. It lie on direct line he
tween Chicago and Omaha Milwaukee and Kansas
City. st Louis and st Paul, being ISL miles from
Chicago and 800 from Omaha; al4from Milwaukee
and $40 from Kansas City; a47 from St Louis and
s46 from 81 Paul. II is ~ miles from Peoria and
is in direct communication with and between all
the great commercial points named. 1t is within
TWENTY-FIVE miles of the inexhaustable coal fields
at Gable and fife, miles Of the lime and stone
quarries al Port Byron. 1t lie situated on the Mis-
sssppi at the foot Of the island of Rock Island on
which Is situated the largest government arsen~l
in the world, and has ware' ouses and agencies for
the two great steamboat lines OF the Upper Missis-
aippi. Its manufactures are varied and prosper
GUS Its iobbing trade is large and room for more,
its retail trade is extensive and enarging Its nat
ural advantages are unsurpassed. Its social sd
vantages are unexcelled Its schools and churches
are many and all well established. 1t has the c.,
R.I&P.; c., N. s iP.: C. B. & @; R. /. &
p and R & Cable railroads. 1t has three differ
ent lines OF street cars. 1t has good systems of
electric and gas illumination. Its sanitary regula
lions are excellent and the locality naturally
healthy Its hotels are modern and hrst-class-
Ii has a handsome opera house. 1t hiss beau
tiful residences and resident property. Its bust
ness blocks are many of them new and all sub
stantiaI II offers better inducements to business,
comfort, happiness, health and prosperity than
any other locality in the country.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1887-05-27
THE LOCKOUT AT CHICAGO.


CHICAGO, MAY "a The situation of the Ia
Dor lock -out is practically unchanged Since
the builders have declared their intention &c
import men from other cities to take th'
places of the men who are locked out it is I've
lieved that the hricklayerS will formally de
clare strike and use all their power TO defeat
the bosses. II is not claimed 10y the employers
that they are getting men as fast rs they
want them, and, i'll fact, but few men are
now working for members of the association
Quite party of hricklaye1s left here Thurs
day for Kansas City, Topeka, and other west
ern cities, where there is a demand for men.
All men going away still retain their connec-
ton with the Chicago union
The Star, the organ of the Knights of
Labor, says: As an evidence of the non
success of the lockout careful canvass OF
the various building trades organizations de
veloped the fact that not more than 100 men
at the greatest estimate are idleh
This is our ultimatum," said President
Vorkeller of the Bricklayers union, with
great emphasis: I'VE want 40 cents an hour
eight-hours work. and to be paid on Satlr-
day, reserving the pay of Friday and Satur-
day to go on the next pay day. That will
pay us up until Thursday, and no excuse
about not having Time to make up pay rolls
cail bp given
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1887-05-27

MONTREAL, Que, MAY 27-The train bear
ing Mr., O'Brien arrived here shortly after
10 O'Clock Thursday evening. A great
crowd awaited it The carriage which Mr.
O'Brien took was drawn 10 81. Lawrence hall
by his enthusiastic admirers, who unhar-
messed the horses MIR O'BTieu made short
speech from the balcony OF the hotel He
SAID he had traversed Canada unharmed and
had informed the people OF the facts they
should know, and had returned unharnel
and assured Of the sympathy OF the people,
Mr., O'Brien is still quite weak,
ALBANY, n. Y. May 2I--Irst before the
New York legislature adjourned sine die
Thursday, MIR William O'Bricn WAS intro,
duced to the assembly, and made a ten min.
nte speech. in which he acknowledged
warmly the sympathy extended to the Irish
cause by the American people. and preiictei
its early triumph
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1887-05-27
eLAosToNe's ALLEGED PROGRAMME
BY Which He Hopes to Secure an Appeal
to the British Voter.

LONDON, May N-It is stated upon the
highest authority that Gladstone, Just previ-
Gus To leaving for Hawartlen Thursday. con
iided to close friend and colleague portion
Of the programme with reference to the coer-
clon bill, which be intends to act upon after
the Whitsuntide recess The particulars of
the expremier's programme, so far as di-
vulgef, involve what might be called OBJ
Struction in most advanced and aggressive
form, but the object sought is all appeal to the
country. When the consideration of the bill
is resumed in the house Gladstone purposes
offering motion TO reject the bill in toto at
single sitting
This proposal, he thinks, will excite furious
debate on the part of the government, which
the Liberal leader himself intends to choke off
by moving to apply to the government the
rule Of clnture Should cloture he refused.
Gladstone will then adhere to his resolve to
head well organized body of otstructionists
who will systematically and pontedly bar the
progress of the bill by awaiting themselves of
all forms of procedure and parliamentary rule
and precedent known to the house. until the
Tories are goaded into appealing to the coun-
try, in the hope of securing an emphatic YER
dict against the obStructioniSts Gladstone
believes that an appeal to the country at this
time would soon result in RELOCATING the Tories
to a much smaller minority than they have
found themselves in for many years
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1887-05-27
LANSD0WNE AT OTTAWA.
THE CITY OPENS ITS ARMS TO THE
GOVERNOR GENERAL,

Who Refers to OBrien, but Has Nothing
to Say Against Mob Law-An Irish
American who Thinks the Editors Tour
m-Advised = The Agitator Enthusiast
cally Welcomed at Montreal.
OTTAWA, Ont, May 27.-Whatever doubts
may have existed as to the loyalty of the cit
for Lord Lansdowne in the past, they must have
been dispelled by the grand reception given
Lansdowne Thursday on his return TO the CAPT
tai from Toronto Never in the history of Can
ada has he or any of his predecessors been ac-
corded such welcome. 1t may, however,
he said thai the demonstration of Thursday
was to show that at least the people of OF
tawa were not in sympathy with the OBren
movement against his excellency owing to
which fact the enthusiasm may be partly at
tributable Whether the reception reflects
the general sentiment of the people of Can
ada only, the receptions given to Lansdowne
in other parts of the Dominion will prove To
the most biased home ruler the welcome of
Thursday must show that at least Ottawa is
not in accord with the campaign against
Lansdowne From early morn the streets
were alive with artisans drapng the principal
buildings and private residences of the city,
and at noon the town was forest of bunt-
ing. Conspicuously among the display it may
be said the American flag f1oated.
Lord and Lady lansdowne and suite ar
rived by special train. There We're j, go peo-
pie at the railway station to meet them.
The vice regal party alighted on the plat
form, where they were received by the recep-
ton committee Half dozen bands struck
up the national anthem, while the asSemblage,
with uncovered heads, shouted itself hoarse
A procession. preceded by 800 horsemen, was
then formed and, amidst enthusiastic cheer
ing, start was made for Cartier square near
the parliament buildings The vice regal
carriage was occupied by the governor gen
eral, Lady Lansdowne. Mayor Stewart, and
Sheriff Sweetland Sir John Macdonald.
premier, and other cabinet members, many
members of parliament, senators, as well as
5000 citizens on foot and IN carriages, brought
up the rear =
When half the route had been tFav-
ersed 100 young men unhtched the
vice regents horses and dragged the carriage
to Cartier square, where $3.50 citizens were
found assembled After the presentation OF
an address by Mayor Stewart and the reading
of a poem by Father DaInson, the Canadian
poet priest. Lord Lansdowne delivered a
| speech in reply His remarks were brief The
occasion, he said, was certainly an auspiciou,
one. The only reason he could give for II
| was the fact that Canada had been invaded
by an enepy-referring TO O'Brien Thi,
enemy at the outset secured possession of the
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1887-05-27

THE greatest wheat deal on record is
said to be progressing. The nanipu-
lstors are credited with holding 40, 600, :
600 bushels and commanding an I'M
limited amount of capital. Their opera
lions extend to Liverpool, and embrace
every grain market in the United States.
II all the rumors as TO the participators
are correct, MacksY and the Nevada
bank clique generally, Rockefeller and
other standard oil men. q Cincinnati
band of capitalists, one in Galveston, T.
D, Armour, and an indefinite number of
other millionaires in Chicago and New
York are engaged in it.