Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1887-11-27
which has ever been of any public use

every sense OF the worn. NOl HlohOub
reason did a simple old country gentle
man of this district remark inno-
Gently when a fashionable visitor
was pointed out to him as a
Baronet of James Is creation !.
Bless my soul, he looks wonder
fully Young to have lived as long as
that " In the town records OF Dork-
ing / find among the entries for 1927
"This day, November 18th, was buried
John Colcott, aged r0S years. Nor
was his case by any means an exception
NJ one. | have myself seen among the
prayestones Of South HOLLYWOOD, Ock-
lev. and. .Newdigate the record OF not a
few lives that fell but little short of the
century, and at least one ''oldest lnhabi-
tant of Holmesdale has recently
gone beyond it-viz.. Mrs. Blackman,
Of Newhaven, who died at Dorklng
on the 10Th of February, 1879, in
her one hundred and first year, having
been born on the 9TH September, 1873.
This parallels the exploit f the Amerl-
can lady who fell dangerously i'll at ninety
seven, and having been "gven up by her
doctor, persisted in recovering despite
all that the good physician could do to
prevent it whereupon he observed TO
her. more in sorrow than in anger, "Ah,
madam. guess you've wilfully thrown
away the last chance of dying which
Providence will ever vouchsafe to you in
this world I"
ocal antiquaries inform me that there
are still TO be found here and there along
this valley and among the hills around It
some remnants OF that ancient Brlton
stock which inhabited this region before
a Saxon had set foot in England. For
my own part, the sole token that | have
vet seen Of this survival of the unfttest
is the presence Of a number of huge
black hogs, which are sufficiently like the
ancient Brtons to be fully entitled to
claim kindred with them, having retain
ed the cleanliness and the intellectual
development of their supposed ances-
tors as well as their melodlous speech
But whether South Surrey has or has not
the honor of being peopled with dis
tinct race. it must undoubtedly be al
lowed the credit Of possessing distinct
language. Few Englishmen, even if
BON in the county, would be likely to
guess what a Boimcsdale ploughman
could mean by saying: IF IN be shirty
and mak's bottle, Use bannick I'm, or
to discover without the aid OF an inter
prefer that this mysterious sentence
means simply. eff he's sulky and makes
q fuss. III give him tbrashIDg." Other
bieroolvpLics of the local dialect are
" beazied," tired ont "gooming," stu
pid: buzzlv," short and plump !;
"doddish. infm in body or mind and,
more curious than all, Heterogeneous"
fretful.
Til within the memory of living men
the quiet little valleys that nestle behind
the great chalk ridge of Surrey were
perfect museum of antique usages and
medieval pastimos. But the last half
century has made sad havoc Of them
even in their last and sure4t stronghold.
"Jack-in- tho-Green, whose gambOls
within a leafy screen of intertwined
boughsw once rs recognized feature
of Nav Day as the sunrise that ushered
it in, has cut his last caper, and danced
away into the world OF shadows with
all his train of shouting comrades.
The march of events has long since
swept into the limbo Of "things that
were the stout, pompous, thick-witted
old parish constable. whom Shakespeare
heard warning his vatchmen that IF
they met thief they might suspect him
TO he no true man by virtue of their
Office, and keep clear of him less they
should b. contaminated by his evil COM
pany. Gone, too, are the parish stocks,
in which offenders against public morali
ty formerly sat imprisoned, with their
legs held fast beneath a heavy wooden
yoke, while sundry small but tiend-
ish boys improved the occasion
by deliberately pulling OIL their
shoes and then tickling the soles of their
defenceless feet. St. Thomass Day is no
longer marked by the appearance OF
bands of smock-frocked country folks,
with pewter dishes or wooden trenchers
held out to receive the charity which
was never refused them when they went
"Gooding' Gas it was called upon that
day. The time-honored English custom
of gOingin procession on certain MORN
ing every year TO mark out the bounds of
the parish has become obsolete las might
be expected il an age of accurate county
mapsat twenty-five cents apiece, andeven
the loyal clodhoppers of Surrey have
ceased TO commemorate, by the hanging
Of All oak bough in the church-tower on
the 10Th Of May, the joyfoul anniversary
upon which one OF the greatest scoun-
drels that ever lived (whom England
afterward contrived to worship for TWEEN
ty-hve years under the title OF His
Most Gracious Majesty King Charles
I'D escaped the doom that thousands
OF better men had suffered for his sake
by taking refuge in a British oak, which
would have done far better service to its
country had it borne his suspended car
cass at the end of one of its strongest
limbs.
But while thus casting away 50 many
of its old customs, South Surrey has
retained one antique usage which is
fully as curious and as picturesque as
any Of those which it has lost. Any
stranger who should happen to be in the
town of Dorking on Shrove Tuesday
MOul4 uOllNt ihbNiAltor WIN uO nAutll
inward wonder and perplexity) that just
about ~ o'clock i'll the day, at the very
timo when the business of the place
might be expected to be at its briskest,
every storekeeper along both sides of the
High streetappeared 10 be putting up his
shutters and locking his door, till all the
shops in tho thoroughfare were closed
and barred. Next the foot passengers
and carts would be seen retiring, leaving
the once crowded street completely de-
serted. The spectator naturally supposes
these strange proceedings to be the pre-
lude of fight or riot OF some kind, an
idea greatly strengthened by the sudden
Appearance of two bands of sturdy young
fellows marching up from opposite ends
of the empty thoroughfare, till they
stand facing one another just at the
point where a narrow passage leading
from the gate of st. Martins church
debouches upon the High street. But
all at once football is seen flying in
the air, while both parties converge
into whirlpool of struggling arms
and limbs upon the spot where it falls.
Then it becomes evident that the snip
posed riot is nothing more than the