Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1887-01-21

"Well, kinder. Say, I'm In SOfl
of box and want little advice
That woman used to DO my wife
We we're divorced about a yeal
ago, and she's now married to him
and they are on their bridal tower,
or toO-er, or whatever you call it.
Pm kinder embarrassed to know
just what policy to pursue, but you
can see the case from a neutral
standpoint. Now, then, shall
knock his head off, treat 'em with
cold contempt, or go over and wish
'em much joyi7
"What we're the grounds for
divOrcep
ave fit too much. 1 wanted to
be boss, and so did she. Shell
either boss that chap or break his
neck.p
ado they know you are hereP
"Oh, yes, and / s'pose they are
kinder embarrassed, too. 1t seems
a case where some proceedings
ought to be taken"
GA row won't help you any
"No, s'pose not, but if | could
git Mary mad you'd hear some Of
the biggest splitting and jawing
which ever fell on mortal ears
Say, she's opened on me at 3 O'Clock
in the afternoon and kept it up
until midnight without stopping
over three times for breath. Such
command of language you never
saww
"Silent contempt would be g
wise policy"
"Not in this case. See how pert
and proud she sits up there She
does that to brag over me. She
wants to give me to understand
that | wasn't the only husband she
could git. If ! treat 'em with silent
contempt, how is she to find ou
that Pm now or my way to marry
the Wilder Belden, who brings me
humping big farm and $4,000 in
cash 1 want Mary to know that
The day she left me she said | was
too pizen mean to marry the fat
woman in a side show, and | want
her to know that l was engaged to
a staving looking woman in less
than six weeks. | think I'll go
over and have a talk with EN-"
"Well, don't raise any row."
"Oh, I shan't unless the felleT
begins to buster around"
lie went up the aisle to the wafer
cooler, and l changed my seat to
the one behind the couple. When
the man came back he stopped IN
front of them and held out his
hand to the man and said:
"HelIo! jim; going down 20
New York 2"
"Yes,p replied the other as they
shook.
"Kind of a bridal too.er, eh r
eyes"
"Got my old woman along, /
see p
"Y.yes !" was the jerky reply.
"well, Mary" he said, as he
turned to her, $50 you've got
another man, ell 7"
"Noue O. your business, Tom
Lapham "
"Oh, it amt Same old Mary, l
see. That's just the chin music
you used to give me when I asked
why dinner wasn't ready"
"You shet upW
"Thats more of It'll Seems al
most as if we were living together
again, and I was lodging the broom
stick. | shall be married Saturday,
and she's four times as good look
ing as you are, and has a big farm
and $4,000 in cash"
"Don't believe tip
"Same old Mary. Sounds per-
fectIy natural to hear you call me a
doggoned liar"
"See here, Tom," said the bride
groom, who was red clear back to
his collar button, "please let up.
This is an embarrassing situation
for me-"
ayes, s'pose it is, jim, and III
do anything to oblige. OF course,
you've married my old second
hand wife, and of course you don't
want to be twitted of it. | see the
pint, Jim and Pm done"
Mary gotup with both fists doub'
led up and her fighting jaw on, but
the bridegroom quoted her, and
the divorced husband said to me
as we walked to the rear of the
car:
Eyes, it's kinder embarrassing 10
jim, and i don't want to hurt his
feelings. Kinder embarrassing for
me. too, and for Mary. First time
ever had a divorced wife, OF met
her married to another man, and
didn't exactly know how to take
IT. NJ. Quad in Detroit Free Press.
A True WIfs's Love.
Tie deepest gold mine in the