The Arizona sentinel., 1887-05-14
PITH AND POINT.

Keep cool and you command every body.
 Don't be mulish. Never kick sim. ply because people talk behind your back.
 A metaphysical paradox-Killing yourself with hard work to get liv- ing.
 -Pat-Phwat is that ye are at Bid dy? Biddy-Shure, it's bottle of hair resthorer Oi'm putting on me ould muff.-LJe.
 -'The mind, "quoth little Felix with quaint wit, ''is some thing that turns round and round in your head and makes up stories. ."-The Bee.
 A poultry authority says: Hens will lay certain number of eggs in year." Our experience is that they will lay an uncertain number.-Lo10eU Courier.
 Justice is blindfolded. but she holds a pair of steelyards in her hand so's she kin tell the difference between the heft of dollar an dime. e.- Washing ton Critic.
 The commercial editor was much exasperated when the proof of the wool market reached him and he read ''un- washed cowboy" instead of ''unwashed .combings. .''-SaH Labe Herald.
 Clergyman to dying man)-Be joyful, brother; you will soon be in a better place. Dying BostOnian-- The idea! Why. dear sir, you can't have seen Boston at all. You've just arrived by rail, I suppose.
 -Teacher-You must not come to school any more, Tommy, until your mother has recovered from the measles. Tommy-There ain't bit of danger that she will give them to me. ''Why, how. is that?" "She is my stepmother. " -Teras Sitttngs.
 -"Why was eternity made, papa?" asked Reginald. ''So that a cricket match could be played clear through" " replied papa, who had lost three days from the office in a busy time watching the first half of one inning played half through. -Burdette.
 Omaha dame (anxiously)-Why, how thin you look! Married daughter Thin! Why. thought was gaining in weight Nonsense. You are get ting as thin as q rail.' It's very queer. My husband can't hold me on his lap half so long as he used to be- cause I've got so heavy. ."-OnsahG U'Orld.
 In the Court of Assizes the Ad- vocate-General points to the accused with gesture of scorn and says: ''Yes, gentlemen, you see at the end of my arm the most corrupt and con- temptible man that the earth has ever produced" The accused Gnterrupt- ing)-I agree with him, gentlemen of the jury. but monsieur has forgotten to say at which end.-Frencb Fun.
 A Kingston (N. Y.) woman, says The Freeman, of that city, returned borrowed book to a friend the other day. She had had the book some time, and the friend expressed some surprise llldU SllG udu ICluluGu lG oO oOOu. ''We1," said she, I'll tell you how it happened. My husband just bought quite a number of books so I had to take out the borrowed books to make room for the new ones in the book case"
 -''You have no idols in America" said Wam Chops to the pastors wife. Haven't we?" she answered, pointing at the tramp who was sneaking back toward the kitchen, ''we can give China points on idols; there goes the idolest thing that ever walked the face of the earth and lived on free offerings and human sacrifices" And then she went on to say that she didn't know whether he had jug or not, but Wam Chops had fled and was already half seas over to China That is, he was deep in his cups. How many cups, dear? Three he cups. Scat!-Burdette.