davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Arizona sentinel. [volume] (Arizona City [Yuma], Yuma County, A.T. [Ariz.]) 1872-1911, 1887-12-31
FAR WESTERN POLITICS.
Why Wyoming Will Lose One of Its Mos
Promising Settlers.

Why Wyoming Will Lose One of Its Most
Promising Settlers.
was talking one night with a set
Ter near Lusk, Wyo., who had just
moved into the country from Missouri
and taken a claim.
Ever live in Territory much?' he
asked
always lived in one," replied.
THAT so? Well, never did before,
an want to ask bout some things.
They say we can't vote for President
in Territory"
NO"
How bout bein' represented in
Congress?"
each Territory has one Delegate
in Congress. He can't vote, but can
speak"
"Hey?" --
"He can debate, but isn't allowed TO
VOTE"
Can vote?"~
NO"
'Only one Delegate in Congress. an
HO StllI wv hOtIliiS5 Ouo hOlAOI "ii jump
up an crack his boots togetherP''
"Well. 1 suppose perhaps that's
about il"
"Ole man for q whole Territory. an
he can only shake his fist at the Cheer
man an yell! Wy, doggone me, ]
never heard tell of such an outrage!
Wy aint we Injuns an done with it?
Say, I'll tell you, 1 did think one time
that mebby I'd kinder go into Con-
gressional politics myself when 1 got
out here, but do you reckon I'd go
down there an not be lowed to do
nothing but mosey round the back
seats an bout once a week mebby git
a chance to put one hand under my
coat-tails and lean back an spout
bout silver coinage or tariff? No. sir,
l wouldn't, an fore I'll have it put
onto me this way I'll go back to Pike!"
r. II Carruth, IN Chicago 1rib une.
The Arizona sentinel. [volume] (Arizona City [Yuma], Yuma County, A.T. [Ariz.]) 1872-1911, 1887-12-31
SECRETARY THOMSON.
The Talented Gentleman Who Took TIL
Minutes of the First Congress.

| The Talented Gentleman Who Took the
Minutes of the First Congress.
John Adams records in his dairy, on the
day after his arrival in Philadelphia as del
egate to the First Continental Congress:
Scaled at Mr. Miffiin's, a grand, spacious and
elegant house. There we had much con-
versation with Mr.. Charles Thomson, who
| is the Sam Adams of Philadelphia, the life of
the cause of liberty.
Six days later, the delegates marched to
Carpenters Hail. inspected it, agreed that it
should serve the purpose, and helped them
selves to seats Peyton Randolph, of Vir-
ginia, was unanimously elected President,
and Charles Thomson, Secretary
Thomson was not present, for he was not
delegate; and the Doorkeeper was sent to
find him and to say that the Congress de-
sired his immediate attendance. After the
Congress had got through the routine of Or
ganization, the Doorkeeper returned, es-
corting Mr. Thomson, who, walking up the
aisle, stopped in front of the President and
said, with a bow. 'Mr. President, 1 await
your pleasure"
Congress desires the favor of you, sir, to
take their minutes" ," replied President Ran
dolph
With a bow MI. Thomson signified his ac-
quiescence, and without word took his
seat at his desk, and began to record the
proceedings of that famous, practical and
sober minded assemblage of lawyers, poll
ticians and men of business. This modest
and quiet beginning was an earnest of the
valuable services WHICH for fifteen years,
Mr.. Thomson rendered to the Congress of
the Confederation.
He was by birth an Hishman, but had left
his native land when only eleven years of
age. By education he became scholar and
made translation of that Greek version of
the Old Testament which is known as the
septuagint, which was published in four
The Arizona sentinel. [volume] (Arizona City [Yuma], Yuma County, A.T. [Ariz.]) 1872-1911, 1887-12-31
VOLUME XVII.
rHE CHRISTMAS STOCKING.


o. it's all very nice for yo4!
But for me it's q tale of woe.
j N an article sad to view,
For they We stuffed and they've ahmed M
so
1nat m ruined beyond repair.
IN ;re's dreadful tin horn. dear me.
70 At has made an enormous tear
BY punch ng straight through my knee.
AMI that red woolen dog-his tail
Is stuck through hole in ny toe;
And that saiiboat-I hope 'twon't sail
Has burst through my seam, know.
And that jumping-jaek-Ic can feel
Whore he's made RIP in, my leg;
And that popgun's gone through my heel
And I'm slipping of from my peg.
And the fire-Tm hung so near
Has melted that candy cane,
And I'm all stuck up. On, dearl
I'm total wreck. it is plain,
Ard the worst of it is, you see,-
That tomorrow shall depart
with very raiXed company
In the DEPTHS of a rag-mans cartl
-Emmd 4 Opper.
The Arizona sentinel. [volume] (Arizona City [Yuma], Yuma County, A.T. [Ariz.]) 1872-1911, 1887-12-31
lone of; the funniest fads' {

-'One of the funniest lads OF
some of the girls of to-day" remarked
a halter yesterday, ''is the desire for
the shape of the heads of their favor
ite young men on paper Every young
man who buys hat now wants the
conformator used on his head. This,
You know, shows his bumps with the
greatest accuracy and within the space
Of few inches. The girl pastes these
in. a scrap book. and when good col
lection has been secured they make an
interesting study"
The Arizona sentinel. [volume] (Arizona City [Yuma], Yuma County, A.T. [Ariz.]) 1872-1911, 1887-12-31
BEFORE IT HOLDING PALETTE AND MAH1-sr1cK.

graceful outlines of whose figure even the
ugly blue bottoIned blouse reaching to her
feet could not hide.
Reclining at ease m an old arm chair near
the LITTLE atr-tlgnt, stove. which served to
warm the interior, was Paul Blake, the
doctors good-Iooking artist nephew twirl-
ing an unlighted cigarette between his slim
white fingers =
Before Doctor Blake. could step forward
TO announce his presence, Paul spoke-evi-
dently Gpropos ofssofne thing under discus
sion ,sssE:..S;-:&.
ITS no use tslsiagfsatts !, he saidisQmis :
The Arizona sentinel. [volume] (Arizona City [Yuma], Yuma County, A.T. [Ariz.]) 1872-1911, 1887-12-31

Christmas presents worth over fifty
cents will not be accepted by members of a
league of Albany girls Burlington girls
won't accept any thing that costs under
fifty cents - BUrl1lafon Free Press.
The Arizona sentinel. [volume] (Arizona City [Yuma], Yuma County, A.T. [Ariz.]) 1872-1911, 1887-12-31

Aristotle, being asked what n
man could gain by telling falsehood,
replied. Not 10 be credited when he
tells the truth
The Arizona sentinel. [volume] (Arizona City [Yuma], Yuma County, A.T. [Ariz.]) 1872-1911, 1887-12-31
CROSS PURPOSES;
Or, The Widow Macks Disappoint-
ment-A New Years Story.
Written for This Paper.l

FOR almost three years
the sharp-v oic e d,
black-ey I'd Wido W
Mack, DR., Paul Blake's
h Gus k e eper, had
ruled with a rod of
iron. But the Doctor,
who was a single man
of thirty odd, peace
loving and absorbed
in his profession, sub
mitted meekly, prin-
cipally from the fact
of his housekeeper's
The Arizona sentinel. [volume] (Arizona City [Yuma], Yuma County, A.T. [Ariz.]) 1872-1911, 1887-12-31

milne. miner, minus ~ This is
the frequent upshot of epeculations in
mining ste ck,-Puck
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-02-13
Mrs. ARP AND THE SIGNS.
Sho Does not Believe In Them, but has
Considerable Human Nature About
Atlanta Constitution,

z
Atlanta Constitution.
Mrs. Arp knows all about the signs. She
does not believe in them, of course, for
they have fooled her two often, but some
how when the sign betokens good it seems
to chear her mp, and she sings around more
happily. / sneezed this morning, most
hartily, and she said: My nose itches and
the game rooster crOwed awile ago on the
front steps. Somehow ! can't help looking
for one of the boys. | wouldn't be sur
prised if we had one of them to supper to-
night" and she has been flying round all
day fixing mp things a little better. Poor
woman, | am so sorry for her, and sorry
for myself, too. Her elder boys are scat
tered now, and some of them we rarely sec.
II costs money to come, and time Is
precious. and business is eXactinS, and so
we have to take comfort with their letters
and try to be content. 1t is hard o the
mothers, very hard; and there should be o
heaven for the revniOu Of families II for
nothing more.
But all signs fail in dry weather and wet
weather too, and my opinion Is that the
nose knows nothing about it, nor the zoos
ter either, for the hoy didn't come, and
Mrs. Arp has been reading some magazine
stories ever since she washed the dishes.
| don't believe she is altogether out of hope
vet. for a little while ago she said hush
To- the children and turned her ears towards
the front gate rs if she heard something.
I wish she was rich so that she could 20
when she pleased and see her children and
take me along 10 wait on her.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-02-13
LeDuc Co, !. I

-
DEAR SIR have very little lime IN
which to pencil of a few lines regarding n
wife. ! am n man of business, and | can't
fool around much, but | would he willing to
marry the right kind of n young woman.
! am lust bursting forth on the glorious
dawn of my Sixty-third year. have been
married before, and as | might almost say,
I have been in that line man and boy for
over forty years. My pathway has been
literally decorated with wives ever since |
was twenty years old.
amt had any luck with my wives
heretofore, for they have died off like
sheep. I've treated all of them rs we'll rs
| knew how, never asking of EN- TO do any
more than | did, and giving of 'em Just the
same kind of vittles that had myself, hut
they are all gone now. There was 4 year
or two that seemed Just rs if there was n
funeral procession stringing out OF my front
gate half the time.
What | want Is 4 young woman that can
darn \ sock without working two or three
tumors into it, cook in n plain economical
way without %pampering the appetites Of
hired help, do chores around the harm and
assist me in accommodating properly.
l.. d. p.
This letter contains n small treSs OF dark
hair that feels like a bunch Of barbed wire
when drawn through the fingers, and has a
tendency to Crock" BILL NHE.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-02-13
CoLUAIN
Pretty Little Fables Devised for tue
Amusement of Good Kids.
THH-puR
FILE ENGLISH PUG.

THE ENGLISH PUG.
Just see the dog which that Lady Is lead
ing With \ silver-plated chain. He is an
English pug. What a Cynical expires
sion his eoun-ten-ance Wears, does it u not?
But | don't suppose he can Help that. If
| saw ne Much of fashionable life rs he
does | suppose / Should become cyn-lc.a al
too. But / hope / Should Not look like
him. Leading him? l give 1t mp.
Does the lady Love him? No,
she does Not love him
She keeps him Because it is the Proper
c,ner. When he ceases to be fash-iOn-a-
HE she will hit him on the head with a
Club. Do you remember when 1t was
the Correct Thing to keep a Poodle? lido,
distinctly. Every swell family kept
its pet Poodle. Suddenly PoOdles went
Ont of style and they All disappeared.
Whence did they 60? / cannOt say, but 1
remember that Their Disappearance
was Co-in-ci-dent with a fall in the Price
of Sau-sa-ges. When pet dogs are fash
ion-a-ble sau-sa-ges are not, and vice versa.
This is curious, Is 1T not?
THE SELF-MADE MAN.
Who is this stout Elderly gentle
man, do you ask, Children? l did not
rec -og-nize him At first. Let us take a
Walk around the block and escape him.
We are in Luck; he Did not see us. If We
had given him a Chance he would have
but-tOn-hOl-ed us and told us q story
About two hours in length. 1t would
have Been about his Early struggles. He
Would have told us how He used to get
up at FOur in the morning when
he Was q hoy, and how he Invariably
had to Crack four inches OF ice
in the pail Before he could Get water to
wash with. 1t frOze hard in those days.
He would have also informed us that his
Youth was spent in hoe-ing POTATOES and
saving wood, and That he has Had only
six months schooling in his life. He would
have furnished in-dis-pu-ta-ble proof of
the Latter statement. He calls himself a
Self-made man. Has he ever done Any
thing of any account? Nothing; but he
Has made a Good deal of money, and that
is what Ais him. If had taken as much
trouble to make myself rs he Says he has
and had not Planned Out better / should
he Deeply disappointed.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-02-13
Wanted to Sell.

4 Chinamau, All Wing Foo, having
scalped himself and joined the society for
the Prevention of IIeathcndom in America,
desired To sell his gods. He employed n
hack lawyer to write an advertisement
which he had inserted in Il daily news
paper. The advertisement ran rs follows:
Il have on hand n choice collection of
gods, which | wish to sell cheap for cash,
having gone into other business. My gods
were manufactured regardless of expense,
and are made OF the most durable material.
No. | is an eight-toed god of short but
robust statue. He is not %Strikingly grace
iul. but is warranted 10 last u man his life
time. lie was presented TO me by my
father, who bought him at . shoe
makers bankrupt sale. In winter, When
used ~ a backlog and we'll heated mp, he
will keep an ordinary size room warm for
hours after the fire goes out. Never goes
on a strike or complains OF hardshipS. lie
is frank and cOnliding in disposition and
pOSSeSsrS Il nature warmly sympathetic.
No. ; is u fat god, upon whom the Bauting
system could have but little effect. He is
rather inclined to run in the ungraceiul
direction of paunch; his legs are irail, and,
upon the whole, he very much resembles
Mr.. Punch. He seems 10 enjoy himself
best when permitted to sit in quiet ron
temptation. lie talks but little, and does
not make acquaintance rapidly, but in a
business way he is perfectly trustworthy.
No. : is a lrOlicSome little god. He is
slightly damaged about the face, having
been used rs n walnut-Crackcr. Even the
most inexperienced hand can drive a nail
with him, taking hold of his ankle, which
are admirably adopted for a handle. |
will sell these gods at a price that will
bring them within reach of people in
ordinary circumstances"
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-02-13

Mr.. Brown, a lawyer. I had gone down
in the morning to cash = check for Mr..
Cranston, and when / came back MIR.
Brown told me somebody had gone through
his room for o large amount Of valuable
clothing and jewelry.
II suspected No. g. He was not in his
room. l concluded TO wait for him. Look
ing about the room / noticed the paint
scratched off the woodwork Of the transom
and that q chair had been so placed IN No.
9 that a person standing on it could reach
the tranSOm, OF eoulse that was the trip
taken by No. s.
al took an impression of No. SIS hand
writingon tissue paper from our register,
and worked the registers OF other hotels
thirty DAYS without success. On SUNDAY
morning, onmy way to Brooklyn, noticed
a big crowd in the Grand Central lobby,
and started in 10 see what was going on
/ saw a man talking to one OF the clerks
whose back had a familiar look. When
he turned it was No. 5, sure enough. But
he had the cheek to deny his identity, and
il was only after being recognized by hall
a dozen people ut our place that he woni
own NJ He had pawned most OF the
stolen articles-sOme in Jersey, the rest IN
Philadelphia"
do Won remember faces?"
eff / onee mark a man I'd know his
face again in a thousand years"
"sAs To how thieves are made, You see
that rs o rs a lad of IL Oh 10 finds en-
ployment he thinks he's a man. He ought
TO have more liberty. He goes TO theatres
and concert saloons, gets to know fancy
CANDLES or drinks. His salary
will not allow this, and he steals to make
up the deficiency. Infatuated with some
woman, he sticks at nothing. Boys In
hanks and insurance offices have, to my
pilfered postage stamps to pay
the piper Very often the boys are well
connected and the matter is hushed up.
Not oue il ten is prosecuted. But N
term in State prison and q man is a 'goner.'
once a thief always n thief. What he
know when he goes up he does
when he comes back"
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-02-13
Answers.
Answers will he published in two weeks.
His Heart was all Right.
IL L. L.

RIuddphid Prtss.
A Distinguished member Of the profession
told me the following story the other day
ola brother comedian, William j. Florence:
Florence, in his younger days, was n great
speech maker. On the least prOvOcatiOn
he would rush before the curtain and hurl
expressions of gratitude and promises of a
speedy return at the backs of the retreat
ing audience. One evening, when he was
doing One-night stands on the New Eng
land circuit, a few injudicious auditors
were bold enough to applaud ut the fall OF
the curtain on the last act. Florence
darted from behind and bowed to the
audience.
Ladies' and gentlemen" he said, 'or
itllOw-iownsmen, rs | may call you, /
thank you. Though you may not he ac-
quainted with the fact, it was in this old
town of New Haven that lived as a boy.
Under the shade of the college elms and by
the side of the old court house ] spent the
happicst days of my life. | see many
familiar faces before me tonight who were
boys with me then. ! have met with some
appreciation in my life, but nowhere is it
more sweet and more dear than in this my
native town. To-day as | walked the
Streets
At this point n gentleman in front whis-
pered in n very loud voice: "Mr. Florence,
this isn't New Haven, it's Hartford"
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-02-13
MediGnal.
A Word About Catarrh.

cit Is the mucous membrane. that wonderful
semi-auid envelope surrounding the delicate
tissues of the air and food passages, that Catsrrh
makes its stronghold. Once established, It eats
into the very vitals, and renders life but a long
drawn breath of misery and disease, drilling the
sense OF hearing, trammelling the power Of
speech, destroying the faculty OF smell, tainting
the breath. and killing the refined pleasures OF
taste. ~Insiduously. by creeping on from q SIM
ple Geld in the head, II assaults the membrsnous
lining and enyelops the bones, eating through
The delicate coats aud causing Inflammation,
Smuggling and death. Nothing short OF tntal
eradication will secure healthto the patient, and
all alternatives are simply p'ocrastinated suner-
inss, leading 10 a fatal termination SANFoRDs
RADICAL CURE, by Inhalation and by Internal ad-
ministration. has never failed; even when The
disease has made frightml inroads on delicate
costitutions, hearing, smell and taste have been
recovered, and the disease thoroughly driven
out"
SANFoRD's RADICAL CURE consists of one bot
tie Of the RADICAL CURE, one box CATARRHAL
SOLVENT. and one IMPROVED INHALER, nearly
wrapped in one package, with full directions;
price, 81.
POTTER DRUG & CHEMICAL Co., BosroN.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-02-13
just Like En-.


She came around the corner the other
evening with tears in her eyes and ashawl
over her head to tell 4 patrolman that her
husband had been beating her again,
well, yOu Ilust 90 to the Police Court
and get a warrant" he replied.
YES, I'll go the first thing in the morn
ing. DONt you think | also have grounds
for divorce"
why, certainly. Go to some lawyer
and tell him what q loafer and brute Your
husband sand You'll have no trouble"
did You say lOafer and brute:"
ayes. ma'an. He ought to he tarred
and feathered and road on n rail"
Don't you say that sirH' she holly ex-
claimed, land don't you dare call my hus-
band q loafer and q brute!'
''Bnt isn't hep
"No, sir. He's one of the kindest and
best husbands in Detroit, and il you talk
about him I'll have you up for SANDER,
The idea! Don't yOu never dare to speak
to me again-neyern'
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-02-13
He Tied and She Blushed.


Detroit Fro Press.
"Ah, madam" he said, rs he extended
a hand to help her mp, 81 never saw a more
graceful fall. You threw up your arms
like a born actress, your little feet INDUCED
in a shuttle, and down You settled with a
swanlike movement which was superb"
Really, sir"
Honest Injun, madam"
And he picked up a No. : rubber which
had been flung from her left foot, turned
his back to n dent in the now which look
ed rs if a cottage had been upset there, and,
raising his hat and making n profound bow,
he took his leave, while she got aboard a
street car and continued to blush and smile
for sixteen blocks.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-02-13
Not to Much to Ask,
Nde Fork sun.

Tramp whose request for food has been
denied)-Well, ma'am, would you let me
sleep in the ten-aere lot hack of the harm if
| won't make any noise?
Woman-Ye-es, | don't mind letting We
do that.
Tramp (appealinglyl-Well, one thing
more, ma'am, before ! say good night.
Would You have me called at : sharp! l
want to catch the limited cattle train West.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-02-13
o EASY CHAIR,

It'd Bits.
q easy chair, enpObed in blue,
Thy silken arms ] praise
Thou exercises such a spell,
A witchery I cannot tell
Come DER me when thy face I view.
Once, longing TO thy arms l few,
Since then thy vast enchantment grew
For there | found fair Claribell:
easy chair!
And ~ thy kindly grace I woo,
For thy sweet comfort ever sue:
For since that meeting there befell
I've found yOu eXcellentN well,
Thy realm enchanted holdeth two
OeaSy chair
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-02-13

Al travis daily except Sunday.
PullfpsB's PalAre Buffet or Hotel slsetdns
Carr through without chang. from stcutsorllo
East 10 Philadelphia and New Yosk, WeaOtIS
lumbus, Cincinnati, IO;iSyjle, Chicsgo, Ithi>
~napelis and ~. Louis.
For through tickets, baggage cheeks s1~TpibE
car accommodations, and any further informative
apply 70 JEO. q. ~ToHrlNSOE, Ticket Agrnta
Pan-HABdle Station, foot Of Eleventh srrst, of
at CITY Ticket O6hee, under Mcclure BOnse, who's
ing. JAkES MCCkgA,
General Manager, YitvhJrZ "a
Z. 4. YORD,.
Sen1 Pas and TScts, Assr: pttstay
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-02-13
Domestic sarcasm.
Nnrmna IninmieRt.

81 see in the newspapers" said Smith,
at the breakfast table, that 4 California
ostrich farmer recently lost three of his
finest ostriches, which were worth $1,000
each"
Dear me-" said Mrs. Smith, how did
he lose them?"
"His wife killed them"
"How in the world did his wife kill the
ostriches?''
''Well," said Smith, balancing a piece of
bread on n fork. II suppose his wife made
biscuits like these, and the ostriches acct
dentally swallowed one"
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-02-13
TO L

HdhcT LdrHsd in Century Brir-n- Brrr.
When ] was seventeen ! heard
From each cen>OriOus tIngne,
I'D not do that If ! were You.
IUu see you're rather young"
Now that ! number forty years.
I'm quite Gs often told
or this or that ! shouldn't do
Because I'm quite too old.
o carping world II there is an age
Where youth and manhood keep
An equal poise. alas, / must
Have passed. in my sleep.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-02-13
The Economy of Nature.

Deacon Bucrag Ito Sunday School class
Yes, dear children, everything in this
world has its Use. There is nothing, how
ever, small or tritling, that was not intend
ed for some good purpose.
Small scholar (thirsting for information
-What good does a pigs tail do the pig?