The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1887-08-18
The Merry Side !

The man who banks on the future does the
biggest business.
"The light of the world" seems to be the coal
on the end of a cigar.
The Democratic papers are trying to prove
that Powell is Mccormick.
"Yes my son, knowledge is power'-but il
doesn't follow that wind is brains"
The old Democratic gun went off all right, in
Kentucky-but she kicked awfully.
1t will not be inappropriate to say corn il
king, now-its about all that's lett.
The circus "cow-boy' should be armed with
an ox-gad, instead of a loaded pistol.
Most men want to down Monopoly, so thai
they may get on top of it and ride it.
The Iowa Veterans Association was merely q
fatigue-squad, going out to dig sink.
A bicycle costs more than a mule, and is
harder to ride. This is hint for poor men.
+.+
The trouble with the old political steed, you
can't always tell when he's going to buck.
The Democrats grieve because the Republican
platform is so big. They can't climb over it.
It's surprising why women should want to
vote, after seeing the out some men make of it.
"Cleveland writes to his wife every day." He
has more time, now, he's quit writing to the
Grand Army.
A great number OF our exchanges contain
very smooth editorials. They slide them in Oh
the block.
The Texas Democrats settled that Prohibition
is wrong-they killed a Prohibition "nigger'
last week.
A correspondent asks if the fellow who al
ways whistles the same tune can be saved. Oh,
yes-if he quits it.
Texas downed Prohibition. How could they
help it. Texas has nearly a hundred thousand
Democratic majority.
If the Cincinnati police don't learn to be bet
ter shots, the citizens will have to move
outside the Corporation.
+.+
Georgia has said that "niggers" shan't be edu-
Gated with the whites. That's good thing-for
the Georgia "niggers."
A modest, courteous man. lives, long after he
is dead. When dude dies he's not only dead,
but the people seem glad oft.
+.+
"Pomeroy is figuring on water works and
street ra1lfoad."-PO Tribune.
They can afford it. There's only one street TO
track.
We are all plunging into the campaign, head
foremost. It's lucky man who don't hit his
head against rock.
The soul of poor man is worth as much as
that of the millionaire and doesn't haye half
as hard time to get along.
+.+
The editor of the Athens Journal wants the
Salvation Army to leave. That editor is evil
IDENTIFY under conviction.
We notice tendency on the part of Democ-
racy and whisky to fuse. 1t took jeff Davis
appeal to defeat prohibition in Texas.
+x*
Portsmouth rejoices that it was no bigger fool
than Jackson in boring for natural gas. We
don't want to discuss that subject.
+x+
If man wants to be safe from fire, let him
move into the old, tumble-down, Landmark"
building. 1t is f1re-proof and time proof.
"The good old days" will never come back to
the old man. Neither will the good old nights
the youth is wasting ever come back to him.
Cleveland hired as substitute during the war
q native of Poland, named George Brinski. So
the Buffalo Sheriff did his fighting with Pole
A colored man of this place ran a doggery at
the Beaver Camp Meeting, and Collector New
mans agent has been running him since then.
Prohibitionists are MOI discouraged, perhaps
over the defeat in Texas. Putting the whisky
out of Texas would be good deal like putting
the birthstone out of the other place.
We cannot, at this distance say whether the
report is true, that the "Iowa Veterans Associa-
tion"is composed of deserters from the Salvation
Army.
A Cincinnati policeman shot at q man two or
three times then locked him up on suspicion.
The people suspicion that officer-of being an
idiot.
The Government officers at Washington show
a consuming love for fine horses. They like
good stock. They have fine OK in the White
House.
MI. Cleveland will only visit a few of the
cities that have invited him. The "dignity of
his office cannot be exposed SO often, to danger.
+.-
The man who is looking ahead for an office
always wants to appear before the people, when
in nine cases in ten he would be more popular
by staying away. Politicians rarely learn this.
Our Democratic editorial brethren are grieved
because there was so much noise at Toledo. If
you kick at that, you'd better get out of this
campaign.
Gen. Rosecrans still persists in saying that
there were ore Democrats than Republicans
in the Army. Certainly! You found it SO at
Rosy!
The Democratic majority in Kentucky has
iwindled to plurality. 1t looks as though
Blue Grass and Blue Ruin can't save the De-
AT Nicholasvile, KY, a woman was arrested
'or stealing three dollars worth of goods. These
women are bouGd the men shall
not get ahead of them.
1.-THE Republican platform is full of hatred,"
'ay our Democratic friends. They perhaps want
he kind of brotherly love that killed three
lundred thousand Union men in Democratic
conspiracy to destroy the Government.
"aH
The two Democratic Presidents have been
actively gagged for some weeks-one in writ
ng letters about soldiers, the other in fighting
Prohibition in Texas.
1t is significant that the motto "God Bless Our
Home!" is taken down at house-cleaning time. |
The brute of husband generally makes up in
profanity what is lacking in sentiment.
"OId Rosey" has been heard from, and he |
wipes the ground with the narrow-minded Re- |
publican politicians, Tuttle, Fairchild, Forak- |
er and their ilk.-C Chillcothe Advertiser.