davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-05-07

alter before the Clergyman or yourself
is ready for him. Your self-love MAJ
suggest that such haste is only the re-
suit of his eager devotion; but do moi
deceive yourselves young women-h,
would have been at the church equally
earyl if II had been to bury you. Temp
kins himself is in many respects en- ex'
cclent husband. and do believe he il
very fond of me; but il is timelines
first and feelings afterward with him, !
know. When business calls him on
journey. only one eye drops a tear a
parting with his wife and offspring
the other is fixed on the clock TO Sc,
that the cab is sent for in time to catct
the train. That catching the train IL
the thought that makes him thin ant
keeps him so. Much of his time il
necessarily consumed in travelling, but
not nearly SO much as is spent in prep
aralion for his journeys. The day pre-
yious to an expedition is manly occu
pied in packing his carpet-bag ant
writing out his direction labels
He leaves over night as in s
will, the most elaborate directions
for the proceedings of the next morn
ing. with codicll, appointing that h,
shall be called half and hour earlier
than he at first considered soon enough
This last command is wholly superhu
Gus, since he always wakes of himself
long before the appointed hour anC
proceeds to ring the house up. Previ
Gus to this he has kept me from my
rest since earliest dawn by perpetually
getting out of bed to see whether it il
going to be fine. Upon this depend
the momentous questions: "Shall b,
take his water proof coat or not?" L
he does, it should be strapped up
once with the other things already lyins
on the hall table ready for departure
not moment is to be lost. His toilel
is hasty enough, but not speedy; for is
his eager desire on retiring to rest t.
have everything ready for the morning
he has generally packed up his brushes
and comb or some other indispensable
thing which has to be disentomed from
the portmanteau. He generally shaver
overnight; but, it not, tremble for his
throat, Since | know with what impru
dent rapidlty he is performing thai
operation in his dressing-room.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-05-07
They Never, Never Use Slang

II just think it's shameful the way
Sally Spittlejig spits slang" said a
Sac City maiden to Sioux City miss.
my! If / twirled my talker as she
does my blooming old snoozer of dad
would tan my duds until the dust was
thicker'n fleas in fly time"
"You betcher brass, and serve YOU
right" replied the Sioux City miss.
"My parents are sun0owers of the
same hue, and il 1 should make n raw
crack in conversation they'd thrash my
rosy cussedness out Of my angelic
anatomy quicker'n old Cleveland can
h->4 bill with his veto. "-OdeboH
la kSss Aorth.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-05-07
The TOuchStone.

man there came, whence none can tell,
Bearing touchstone 10 his hand,
And tested all things in the laud
By his unerring spell.
Quick breath OF transmutation smoto
The fair to foul. the foul to fair;
Purple nor erminc did he spare,
Nor scorn the dusty coat.
OF heirloom Jewels priced so much,
Were many changed to chips aud clods,
And even statues of the gods
Ctumbled beneath its touch.
Then angrily the people cried;
THE loss outweghs the profit far;
Our goods suffice US as they are;
We will not have them tried"
And since they could not so prevail
To check his unrelenting quest
They seized him, saying; "Let him tesi
How real II is, our jail !"
But though they slew him with asword.
And in 4 fire his tombstone burned,
Its doings could not be o'erturned,
It's undoings restored.
And when, to stop all future harm.
They strcwed Its ashes on the breeze.
They little guessd each grain OF these
Conveyed the perfect charm.
North, south, in rings and amulets.
Throughout the crowded world tits borne
Which, as a fashion long outvorn,
Its ancient mind forgets.
- Willidnl ARinghdm.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-05-07

the valuable assistance of a
chair seat. In fact, keeps
moving on in order to keep
comfortable.
An Italian artist in this city,
whose sole income comes from
his brush, uses but one color,
and that is black. lie is a boot
black.
Miss Maude White of &C.
dar Springs, adds Il brilliant
star to the glittering galaxy
of beauty present this even.
ing.
Lost---A young mans heart
A liberal reward will be
paid. if it can be found in
the possession of Il certain
young lady.
Those who think that print
crs cannot dance, should be
on hand tonight. The way
the Dorseys, Valkus. Myers,
Walter, Beach and others are
stripping the light fantas-
tic" is a caution.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-05-07
THIRD ApDITIoS-12 p. NJ.

A man and wife are one ex-
cept when negotiating for
board. Then they are two.
Mrs. White, of Kansas
City, sister Of Mrs. W. A. l..
Konx: is one of us.
1t has been recently discov-
cred that an egg is like a colt
of no use until it's broke.
LOST "A White, en-
broidered handkerchief.
Finder will please leave
same at this Office.
There are some Savages
present but they behave
most admirably and show
no signs of the wild act.
c. K. Gilbert powned his
coat for prohibition drinks,
and appeared in the anti
room in the Office boys
ulster:
One dude has a pair of
pants that ct him so quick
that he is unable to utilize
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-05-07

SECOND ADDITION IL T.. VI.
DR.. Bob Blair dances pref
ty well.
Prof. Georges students
dance well.
1910 o'clock: Twenty
two couples on the floor.
Chewing gum is conspicu-
ously absent this evening.
Fifty-two red-headed girls
landed in Castle Garden re-
Gently, and the officers were
very civil.
The less a wife tries to man
ange the better she will man
age to get along with the old
man. This is official.
1t is said that a mule cannot
bray if you tie a weight to his
tail and hold it down. The
man who holds it down does
the braying.
CHURCH MEMBERS PRESENT.
Presbyterians Fifteen,
Methodists, twenty; Bap-
fists, eighteen; Scattering,
forty,
The young man who sits
by the window and does not
dance employs his time well
when the dance stops, fan
ming the girls.
Some young men who sang:
I'VE won't go home till morn
ing, till daylight doth appear"
didn't 60 home even when day
Ugh, cid appear. They went
to the station-house.
Silent Musings: The
young man who sits in the
corner wishing to dance with
his best girl who is engaged,
for the next waltz.
Miss - let her fan fall
to the floor. The polite Mr..
- stopped to pick it up
by accident he was overbal-
anced and-down he came.
Col. Henry Gibson was a
conspicuous figure in the
lobby, and although advanc-
ed in years, involuntarily
reached out for every pretty
girl that passed by.
1t is beautiful to look at the
soft, white cloud that rests on
the horizons rim, and dips into
the ocean. II reminds one of
a Charlotte Russo reposing on
an azure plate. just under a
pair of soft blue eyes.
FATHER. Who was that
young man who was singing
below your window last night?
JENNIE.-Which one, pa?
F.-The one who sang: Pm
Waiting, My Darling, for Thee"
J.-Oh, that was a young
undertaken friend Of mine.
The hens come alike into the
garden of the lust and the un-
just. and they root around 10
their hearts content, which is
usually to the proprietor's
hearts discomfort. If they
would only eat up the potato
bugs it would be all right.
But they don't. They leave
them alone as religiously as
though GOODNESS existed be
tween them. But If the pota-
to bug could out-sing n'ghtin-
gales, and were worth ten
dollars apiece, the hens would
leave everything else to ban
quet on them.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-05-07

FIFTH ADDITION A. NJ.
Mr.. T. o. Edwards, of the
T. & p, is having an elegant
time.
Brumbaugh, the big fiddle
player, has q great smile on
his face.
Mr.. and Mrs. G. II. Gilbert
we're present awhile in the
early evening.
Prof. Putt, the cornet
player, is pronounced by all
a "sweet' player.
A blind man in Dallas can
tell the color Of a red-hot
stove, simply by touching it.
Ten of the Light Guards
are present, including the
Captain and Lieutenant.
Miss Ella Doolcy, of Gal
weston, is one of the most
graceful dancers in the house.
The dead man always takes
the lead in a funeral procession.
II is the only chance that some
men will ever have to lead.
If silence is golden" why
is it that dumb people, as a
rule, are poor? When you
answer this we'll have another
ready.
Mr.. John Craig, foreman
of job department for Shaw
& Co.. is spending a pleasant
time with us.
Four young men keep
watch on the programme of
two young ladies and get
left every time.
When the poet wrote:
1t fell upon a day
In the merry month of May.
we feel pretty sure that he
didn't allude to the rent.
The angry reader who under.
took to whip the editor would
have given up the attempt long
before he did, but the editor
wouldn't let him.
The only thing that woman
can throw with any degree OF
accuracy is a kiss. When a
pretty girl throws kiss at you,
she hits every time.
A man who was kicked sew
enteen feet up in the air by a
mule, would have recovered ia
time IL he hadn't landed on a
banana skin. The combination
killed him.
Criminals in high places are
the most dangerous kind of
criminals. - New York Trib-
une.
How about criminal hang
ing from the limb of a high
treeg He's not dangerous.
Capt. and Mrs. McCargar
graced the occasion with
their presence, till after ii
o'clock, when they left on
the east bonnd street car for
home, having spent a pleas
ant while among rs.
One of the gentlemen
present was heard to remark
that this ball would be re-
by the young peo-
pie present for many days |
as one of the most pleasant
entertainments ever given in
the city.
Among the ladies present
tonight, were:
Misses Drue Anderson,
Nellie Douglas, Emma Gee,
Of Sherman, Mary Bennett,
Clara Smith, Donnie Gillian,
Louise Boyd, Emma Harris
Of BRENNAN, Boyd, Stone,
Dooley, Emma Finn, Anna
Murdoch, Dee, Cox, Hattie |
Bedsoe, Maud White, Lula
Record, Della Hill, George |
Anderson, Lula Smith, Bes-
sic Beach. Jessie Jones. Mad
ans: Monta Beach, George|
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-05-07

The list OK membership Of the American
shipping and Industrial league Is about thirty
thousand persons all pledged % suppr,1 such
men for congress ss will advrpse the ,.ierest
Of the American merchsnt-sAriRA
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-05-07

is better than n hundred live
dogs. II would be wrong TO
infer that Sam was ever a
tramp, hut he expresses the
sentiments of that class so
strongly that it looks as though
he might have been there him
self.
We regret to state that
Commodore j. &. Jon cs
Jumped his cases" He
says there are too many pref
ty girls in the ballroom.
Ladies, beware of the Com
modorc.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-05-07
WOMAN GOSSIP.

Fair SOFA Warning to Those
About to Marry. -.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-05-07


Is. Waltz.
A new and interesting tea-
ture Of the evenings enter
tainment was tho publication
of a society paper every hour
during the dance, "Thc Hour
ly Item." Mr.. George Beach
foreman Of the w. N. U. COM
posing rooms, was managing
editor assisted by a score or
80 of reporters. The type
was set by volunteer printers,
who for a while would leave
thoir girls to some other fell
lows care. The HERALD re-
porter borrows the type to
reproduce the several issues
of the Hourly Item:
FIRST ADDITIoN-10 p. NJ.
News men to the front
The Grand March was glo-
rious.
Gray in the service-A letter
carriers uniform.
Mr.. and Mrs. Stone, bride
and groom, grace the occas-
ion.
A tack is an easy thing to
find-when you are not looking
Jor it.
It is the miserable little corn
which feels the biggest when it
is in tight place.
Mr.. and Mrs. Hootcr, bride
and groom, enjoy the fes-
tlvities tonight.
The world is called fleeting
show; but none of us want to
go out between the acts.
Two kinds of writers possess
genius those who think, and
those who cause others to think.
II the millennium ever does
come, there will be plenty of
people who will find fault with
it.
The sudden changes in our
climate keep a man busy jump
ing from hot Scotch whisky to
lager beer.
When a woman is selecting
a spring bonnet, she often
loses her head" but she al
ways finds it again in time for
the bonnet,
How vain are all thinge here
below,
How false and yet how fair I;
Oft when to see my girl | go,
Some other fellows there.
Item by q florist: Two-lips
flourish best in a parlor, under
a subdued light, at this season
OF the year. In a month or so,
they will bear transplan ting to
the park, or squares, or around
front gates.
A French engineer, after a
series of experiments with a pie
baked by certain Dallas girl,
now announces that he believes
the project of tunnelling the
Rocky mountains is entirely
practicable.
Harmony Brown: II heard IL
was all of between you and
Miss Smith 2"
Esthetic Wobbinson: "Yaas.
Incompatibility of complexion;
she didn't suit my furnichur,
me boy"
"A woman proposes to go
over the Niagara whirlpool in
o rubber bag" She will sue
coed. A woman who is light
headed enough to seriously
entertain such an idea is in no
danger of sinking.
According to the Sweden
borgians, men who live on the
the planet Jupiter, prepare
themselves for death as soon as
they get bald. In this mundane
sphere il is then that they be-
gin to enjoy themselves.
The recent muddy rise in the
Trinity river has been attrib-
uted by some to the heavy
rains lately. Thisis a mistake.
Three Fort Worth girls stimuli
ta7cously thrust their feet into
the river AZ that point, and thus
caused the disturbance.
Ran Joneeesve one dead lion
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-05-07

Ulc Is II CdutlOH.
A WHISPER TO THE
BARTENDER.
In his ear he whispers gaily,
"If your eye by signs can
tell,
Bar man you have seen me
daily
Know l love your liquor
well.
Love the rosy amber liquid
That with ice you mix for
me"
lie was but a gentle printer,
And a bar-room tender he.
He replied in accent milder,
eyes, | know you, all the
same,
But you've played it, he
grew milder,
"Once before, I'll stop
your game
Then the printers steps did
falter,
As he stumbled on the
floor;
Did the bar mans purpose
alter?
Mo- he kicked him through
the door.
Then the brother typos sadly
Bore him to his room TO
rest,
For the bar man hurt him
badly;
Let us leave him here UNI
dressed.
FOURTH ADDITIoN-1 A. NJ.
Items are getting scarce.
The band makes splendid
music.
Wasn't that last waltz a
"dandy?"
The girls do say that the
"ITEM' is a "Dandy."
Mr. II. c. Scaffel, of Knox
vile, Tenn, is in the house,
Jim Knight, book-keeper at
Aldridge's, is having a pic
mic.
Miss Jones broke her
fan-fortunatey not over any
ones head.
Have you seen George
Beach's fat little baby!
Don't miss it.
We notice Miss George
Anderson among the many
petite little dancers.
1t is thought that about
one hundred couples are
present this evening.
Messrs, Clark and Roberts,
of the T. & p, came in late,
but are welcome atany time.
Mr.. II. T. Roberts arrived
late, but that matters not,
he is having a nice time.
Subscribers failing to get
the ITEM, will please report
to the circulator, Jimmie,
the "dude.
Lost--A horseshoe breast
pin, with three rubies on
each side. The finder will
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-05-07

Firc-out the boy whose
feet are so big that it takes
him two minutes to make
one revolution in the waltz.
A certain young lady says
DR.. Bob Lair may be a good
dentist, but he dances like
he was pulling teeth. and
her arm is paralyzed.
Interrogation point. Gar
| have a dance with YOU
this evening""
"My list is complete and
the young man sighed very
loudly.
The Dallas daily herald. [volume] (Dallas, Tex.) 1873-1887, 1887-05-07
THE 1pP LAST NIGHT
Tcnde' by the Western
Newspaper Union to En-
ployes and Their
Friends.

ployes ana Their
Friends.
The largo hall over the
Western Newspaper Union
press room, second floor, last
night was arranged for n
dance, aud at an early hour
the hall was well filed with
the young, the gay and the
beautiful. Mr.. Monta Beach
was floor manager and the
program was as follows:
GRAND MARCH.
[. Waltz.
=. Lanciers.
s. Glide Polka.
1. schottischc.
$. Lanciers.
e. Waltz.
:. Glide Polka.
3. Lanciers.
Q. Schottische.
10. Waltz.
II. Newport.
II. Lanciers.
10. Schottische.
II. Glide Polka.
IL. Waltz.
rs. Lanciers.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1887-04-07
POLITICAL AND MISCELLANEOUS
The Election.

AS we make up the FORMS this, We'd
ncSdny, afternoon, the summary of the
election returns seems to Indicate that
the republican state ticket is elected by
about 10000 plurality. The prohibi
tory amendment is lost by from 4.00C
10 $500, and the amendment relative
to salaries of state officers is carried by
a small majority.
In this Judicial Circuit, Simpson is
elected over Judge Tuttle by about
1000 majority.
The Board of Supervisors of this
county will stand seven republicans to
two democrats. The democratic tick
et in Grayling township, is elected en-
tire, with the exception of Supervisor
Hum, and three constables.
Election returns show large republi.
can gains in all parts of the state, ex-
cept Wayne county, and indicate that
the party will be well organized for the
campaign of 1888.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1887-04-07

ID. A. Bradford. Wholesale paper
dealer of Chattanooga Tenn, writes
that he was seriously afflicted with a
severe cold that settled on his lungs
had tried many remedies without bene-
flt. Being induced TO try DR.. Kings
New Discovery for Consumption, did
so and was entirely cured by use of a
few bottles. Since which he has used
It in his family for all Coughs aud
Colds with best results. This is the
experience of thousands whose lives
lave been saved by This Wonderful
Discovery.
Trial Bottles free at N. II. TRAvER's
Drug Store.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1887-04-07
No Profit in Oats.

Many farmers say there is no profit
in raising oats, yet others find them a
profitable crop. IL the market price
of the grain is not profitable, the price
paid for young stock always is. The
farmer who sells oats and feeds his
calves, pigs, lambs and colts all corn
or nearly so, makes a mistake. Not a
few men find oats improbable because
they do not feed them. or do not feed
them properly, yet more because they do
not get the full value of the straw. II
oats are cut five days earlier than is the
common practice, the straw is worth for
feeding two-thirds of it's weight of
timothy hay, and this earlier cutting
increases. rather than diminishes, the
value of the grain. or course the
straw must be kept bright. II IL is
not cut until it is dead ripe. amer
lean dgriculturist.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1887-04-07
Astonishing Success.

1t Is the duty of every person who
has used BoSohee'S German Syrup TO
let its wonderful qualities be known to
their friends in curing Consumption,
severe Coughs. Group, Asthma
Pneumonia, and ia fact all throat and
lung diseases. 10 person can use it
without immediate relief. Three dos
will relieve any case and wa consid-
err it the duty of all Druggists to rec
commend it to the poor, dying con-
sumptive, at least to try one bottle. as
$4,000 dozen bottles were sold last
year. and no one case where it failed
was reported. Such n medicine as the
German syrup cannot be too widely
know. Ask your druggist about it.
Sample bottles to try, sold at 10 cents.
Regular size, rs cents. Sold by oil
Druggists and Dealers in the United
States and Canada.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1887-04-07
Increasing Organic Matter in the
Soil.

In all we'll cropped soils the roots of
the crops, together with portions which
remain upon the soil, especially when
grass is raised, form n gradually increas-
ing amount of organic matter, which
becomes incorporated with the soil by
blowing and tillage and adds greatly to
the capacity of the soil. The presence
of organic matter in the soil increases
its fertility by equalizing the amount
of water which the soil will retain, so
it defends the plants against drouths,
1t not only absorbs water like sponge
when it rains, but in dry weather il
abstracts moisture from the air which
it yields to the plant, besides it arrests
and detains certain kinds of plant food
which might otherwise be washed
away or down through the soil by rain.
Again, by its color, it absorbs the heat
of the sun and thus warns the soil,
and by its slow decomposition, which
is going on all through the growing
season, it produces carbonate acid gas,
which, being dissolved by the water,
aids in dissolving and preparing other
constituents of the soil to be taken up
10y the crops. Organic matter is there
fore to be increased in soils in which
it is not naturally too abundant, in
every economical way. Hence com
posts consisting largely of such organ
ic constituents as straw, leaves,
swamp hay, sods, weeds, peat, swamp
muck and wood mold, are to be rec
amended, qnickened with stable ma
nure, or with wood ashes or lime, in
place of concentrated fertilizers, which
supply only the constituents supposed
to be removed. Those articles In the
form of bone-dust, ashes, potash salts,
ETC., may well be added TO any com
post, and are thus often most convent
emily applied to the soil.
AgriculturtStJ for april.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1887-04-07

A lady died recently at the Georgia
asylum, whose case was one of the
most peculiar in the history of the i'm
stitution. She was perfect encyclo-
pedia. She read voraciously, and re-
membered everything she read. AS
she had means. she was INDUCED in
the matter of books. She always
bought from Lippincott Whenever
information was wanted in law, medi-
cine or letters she was appealed o.aD2
her answers were always correct. The
Legislative committee, on one occasion,
was entertained by her Tor an hour.
So Impressed were thu members with
her accomplishment that they com
planned of DIR. Powell for OBTAINING her
in the institution. Just go back -
saiS the doctor, land ask her what
size thinks of the Free Masons." They
lid so, and found out that she was the
crAziest woman in the building At
lama Constitution.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1887-04-07

The last argument OH prohibition
was delivered in the Central metho-
dist church yesterday. 1t was the al.
legation of the reverend preacher that
Messrs. Duffield, Kent. Shelley and the
rest who opposed prohibition were
liars. This may have been powerful
argument, and it may have carried
conviction to the hearts of the rever-
end gentleman's hearers; but was il
in accordance with the spirit OF
christian charity Detroit Ne,oS.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1887-04-07
The American Agriculturist

For April, 1887. offers its readers a re-
markable variety of interesting and in
structive matter pertaining to the farm,
garden, hearth and household. The
front page engraving presents several
spirited Florida scenes, another full
page illustration portrays two noted
types of English pheasants. Some
fifty smaller original engravings are de-
voted to various animals, plants, i'm
plements. barn and house plans, etc,
etc. Among the very many topics
treated are: Wrong impressions on
fish culture. by Seth Green; summer
grating, A. s. Fuller; sowing flower
seeds, and floral designs, Peter Hen
derson; ornamental wild flowers Of
the plains, Prof. Chas. L. Bessey; or
ange culture in Floridaa, DR.. s. e.
Newton; better seeding, Col. F. ID.
Curtis; truck farming in the South, DR..
A. Oemler; beneficial insects, Mrs.
Mary Treat. The household and boys
and girls departments are, as usual re-
pIete with interesting matter, and il
the pages devoted to the exposures of
humbugs n relentless war against every
kind of fraud is waged. Price 81. 80
per yesr. English or German; Single
numbers, Is cents. Address, Ameri-
can Agriculturist, 751 Broadway. New
York.