The Washington critic., 1887-02-05
GENERAL ANo rnIrrcuLAR.


Mr. Presidents 1t is announced that you
have signed the Interstate Commerce bill.
Knowing that you can write your name, we
do not doubt the story. In this connection,
however, we may state that there are some
Democrats who cannot write their names,
md we may also remark that you are DIFF
ierent In other respects from a good many
Democrats.
Having signed the bill, 1t n9xt becomes
necessary to appoint five Commissioners,
at an annual rental OF $500 each. You
have probably s,0Si, 1s5 men in your Iuris
diction from whom to choose, each one of
whom would grab on to 1t like hungry
tramp to canvas back.
We are no tramp, Mr.. President but any
time you have got a canvas back ready for
us, drop us line. Possibly you had better
Telegraph at our expense. 1t comes quicker
that way.
The Senate of the United States would be
glad to show its appreciation of our modest
utuntIrlng efforts by confirming us at the
usual rates.
Of the millions Of other possible candi-
dates, we haven't word to say. Get good
Industrious, sober men, though, so we won't
have too much to do during business hours.
Society must be attended to, you know.
The Secretary Of the Treasury, If reports
he true, has resigned. 1t takes large hat
TO cover Daniel Manning's head, not only
in the morning but during the other hours
tf the day. Since the death Of Samuel j.
Tilden Mr.. Manning has been the Moses to
lead his party out OF the wilderness, present
company, Of course, excepted. Up to date
however, the traditional forty years has not
elapsed, and ihe taileud Of the party is yet
down in Egypt making bricks without
straw. It's pretty tough, Mr. President
hut We are not paid salary as Admuistra-
tiOn suggestor, and we are dumb.
lu lsSS You are TO have the right.ot-way
Who will build the road and put the rolling-
stock on is another question. Some people
say Hill will get it, but in our opinion some
people don't know any more than other
| people.
II auy of your friends doubt this they
had better asi Daniel Manning.
Mr. President, The al'-absorbing question
in lSSS Will he who is going to git thar"
| \ free ballot and an honest count will be
demanded by the friepds of liberty, labor
and law, and II the Mugwumps don't stand
| from under, by the great Jehosaphat some
| thing will drop On them with dull thud
that will paralyze G tire communities and
spl, the Democratic party from the cradle
to the grave.
THE WASHINGTON Critic.
Senator Beck to the Railroad Senators s.
| l..1f 10. a.. L.. a..
| II the Ground Hog will call at this Office
lie will hear Of something to his advantage.
p. s.-We have got a shotgun, and that
| Hog will be able TO come out OF his hole
through a sieve next year.
| a sample Of this weather should be pre-.
served and placed on exhibition at the
| grand National Permanent Exposition.
The Interstate Commerce bill has become
law and we shall see before long whether
Congress or the railroad men know better
what the business interests of the country
need.
Congressman W. d. Hill of Ohio will GER
tainly slay the telegraph editor of the Gin
cnnati Enquirer If that worthy persists in
referring to him in glaring headlines, as
"Bill Ilill," "Roaring Bill' and "Roaring
Bill Hill.n Mr.. Hill is a nice, quiet gen
tltman, and lie is not deserving of such cir
cus-bill treatment. He could stand 1t II
the En9vircr referred to Mr.. wilkins as
"BOodlo Beriah," and Mr.. Cheney as
"Snarling Cheney" and so on, but to be
| picked out rs the one particular scapegoat
is too much, even If he is roaring good
| Democrat.
Chicago will erect a monument 10 Lincoln
Park to Renter. This Reuter-, by-the-way,
is not the rooter Chicago builds her greatest
glory on.