The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1887-02-02
BRIC-A-BRAC.
WOMAN'S AIM.


That is to say, stand near the hen.
Parasites-Eye-slasscs.
A matter of corcs-Applcs.
The plumbers vcgctable-Lcek
High strung-Tclegraph wires
4 grave charge-Tne seyton's fec.
Hours Of idolness-Sparkling days.
Do wiry men make the best telegraphcrs::
A tcctotaller-An accountant in 4 tea
store
Much adicu about nothing-Thc parting
Of two society girls.
The wood-chopper is the chap who can
always make his pile. ?"
The p's that Russia wants-P;undcr,
power and prestige.
No man can digest the English gramna.
until he has ct a mology.
A maid is ayoung lady who is single and
who will be won if she marrics.
When the heart is full the lips arc silent:
when the man is full it is different
An aftcr-diuner speaker-Thc bonbon
cracker.
Never trust the man who is always de-
prcciating his associates.
4 restaurant keeper can make both ends
meet by serving calf's head and ox-tail soup.
The latest wrinhle-That in the tails OF
your overcoat.
When man loses his false teeth, could
it he called q gum drop?
| Tho WOW of Io - no
cause many feet have troddcn it.
"a Terrible Temptation n''-To say chest
nut when an old joke is sprung
The more intelligent you make 4 jury
man believe he is the stupider he gets.
4 conductor can be polite to the ladies
and at the same time knock down the iare.
Hens have an ambition similar to men.
They all want to get on the highest roost.
'"Two heads are better than one" This
was written before thrccstory bonnc,s came
in fashion.
1t is said of one fashionable young man
that he never paid anything but 4 compl!-
ment
4 sporting paper says: "a match race
has been arranged" We presume it viii
end in a scratch.
The elephant is never troubled with bag
gage when he is travelling, his trunk is
always ION a head.
Mr. John L. Sullivan seldom becomes
unconscious, still his opponents arc always
alarmed when he feints.
An exchange says that the masculine
girl must 60 If she have the go" il her
why shouldn't she.
Education is something like love. Most
men think they've got it till they come to
be about 40 years old.
That only can with propricty be styled
| refinement which, by strengthening the IL
tcllcct, purifies the manners.
An Ohio girl mas had 50 offers Of mar
riages within two years. Perhaps the 100ti.
man will be the unlucky fellow.
A Nebraska court has undertaken to cx-
plain What is in sausage" " At last
reports it had got no farther than the bark.
The most unkindnest cut Of all is fre
quently furnished you by your butcher
with the assurance that it is sirloin.
When q girl gets mad and rises from i
fellows knee, but thinks better Of it and
goes back again, IS what they call q relapse.
\ Louisiana Judge decides that man
who loses money for poker may recover
from the man who sells him the chips.
Some one wants to know why spikes
we're placed on the head of the Goddess Of
Liberty. To keep her hair Up, of course.
An article on gingerbread says thar il
has been made since the 18th century. We
have certainly seen some that we thought
might have been.
Save the fat" says an exchange. Ii
!hcrc is going to be preference il those to
be saved, better save the lean. The fai
ones Will burn better.
\ professional palmist says persons Car
never tell q lie with his hand smut. He
can'twith bis mouth shut, either, Palniistry,
it Will be seen, is a great study.
What is the difference between an
angry lover and a Tilted maid?' Give it
up" why, one is cross beau, and the
other is a cut lass.
The discovery of a scarlet snake is re
ported by an Ontario paper. Theman who
discovered it bad in ali probability been
painting the town red.
A New Yorker shot at his wife, but the
bullet hit nothing but her store hair. Il is
very hard to get at the cXac: boundaries Of
a woman nowadays.
One difference between riding horse
and riding a hobby is this-a man can eel
off horse at any time, but from !; hobby,
never.
That electric boy in California-.iust dis
covered-can be utilized when he becomes
few years older by marrying him to III
electric belle.
Mr. J. H. Hofmans horse bit him on
the shoulder this morning, 10 the amuse-
ment Of these who witnessed it and no pain
full injury to Mr. Hoffman.
Miss Stager, of Chicago, is to marry
Lord Butler One would suppose from
the lady's name that she would prefer a
coachman to butler.
The Irishmans manner of obtaining
sound sleep is worth imitation He said
that a short sleep did for him, because when
he slept, he paid attention to it.
FullnesS under the eye denotes language.
When the fullness is large and discolored
and hurts, this denotes that the man has
been using too much of it.
She-"Isn't that papa coming He
How provoking; was just going to steal
kiss" She GDgeniously)-Hes awfuily
near-sighted, Charley-awfully.."
IF a man could only catch fish as easily
rs ne can lie about it, lamerts Texas
editor. Hc could. If ilc only understood