The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1887-07-06
pith and Point.

and peas.
AN orange has been raised at Iona, Mich.
which has One-quarter of n lemon grown
perfectly in one side of it.
THE sign "Beware the dog " is not hung
up " that he who runs may read but "tha
he who reads may run. "-Life.
VIOLET: Ma, how do people know tina
it's man in the moon?" Mother (sadly)
Because it's always out nights. "-Life.
BROWN: " Hello, Jones! How's YOU
wife," Jones "a little deaf: Very buster
ing and disagreeable this morning. '-E1.
You've student physician to charity pa
tenD: IL think you must have "a
some kind of "a fever but-our class has
only gone as far as commissions. I'll come
in again in week. wallpapers Bozdr
WHERE will mosquitoes pass the season.
Each and every one of the ten thousand
summer resorts advertise positively nc
mosquitoes" But this may be merely a
warning for them not to come.-Troy Tele.
grdm.
A NEW ORLEANS banker who was fond OF
using Latin to enrich his conversation was
asked one evening by young lady in a
hotel where he had been. "Oh just out
side in the cuspadore, walking pro and con, y
he replied.
" EXCUSE me, sir, but haven't we met be-
fore? Your face is strangely familiar"
Yes, madame, our host introduced us to
each other just before dinner" "Ah, l was
positive | had seen you somewhere. | never
forget face."-ErchdBge.
A LONDON omnibus conductor who was
discharged fifteen years ago has just sent
the company a letter saying that he had de-
frauded the company of about $50 while in
its employ, which amount he intended to
repay in small installments.
WHAT is called as seat " in the New
York stock exchange was sold recently for
$4,000, but the man who bought it will
have to stand up all day and shout at the
top of his voice in order to make profit on
his investment.-Bdti american.
THE latest popular superstition is notion
that when a red-headed girl appears on the
street white horse will come into view inn
mediately after. Numerous experiments in
other cities show this to be fact. There is
wonderful revival of interest in the girls
with auburn locks.-NeU Bedtord Mercury
WE never heard of anybody that was
hurt by ripe watermelon, and never saw
anybody that could point out any person
who was willing to say that he ever knew
or heard any one remark that he knew of a
persons being cognizant of any ones being
harmed by ripe watermelon. -Sprinafeld
Union.
A MAN at Richville, Mich, is liable to lose
his memory at any time. More than once
he has passed whole nights within Mailing
distance of his own house, fearing to move,
as he was totally unable to recall the direc-
ton he should CO. or even how his house
looked or was situated with regard to the
surrounding country.
CULTURE is becoming widely disseminated.
" Have you sawed that wood?" demanded a
lady of tramp, who had inquired for break
fast. Have / Sd1Ced that wood!' exclaimed
the tramp, in contempt. " have seen that
wood, and | don't intend to work for a lad V
who doesn't understand the rules of gram
mar better than you dop'
THE news editor prepared an article, in
which he said, d" Mr.. Dash is hopelessly ill -
Before going to press Mr.. Dash died, and a
hasty alteration was made in the sentence
to meet the new condition of affairs. When
Mr.. Dash's friends read in their paper that
" Mr.. Dash is hopelessly dead ~ they were
naturally shocked Boston Transcript
SOME years ago wealthy citizen of Bah
renfeld, in the Duchy of Holstein promised
worthy married man of that town that
he would give house to the mans twelfth
child, if he should have that many. In due
time number twelve arrived, and the proud
father asked the wealthy citizen to make good
his promise. This he refused to do, saying
that the whole thing was Joke. The father
then went to law about it, and, although
the promise was only a verbal one the court
not only decided in favor of number twelve
but authorized the plaintiff to choose which
ever one of the defendants houses he liked
best.
Nor long ago wag changed the notice
Wait until the train stops" in car of the
London underground railway, to "Wait
until the rain stops" The next day, which
happened to be rainy day, French gentle
man got into the car and read the notice
and, though surprised at it. determined
Loyalty to obey the rules of the road At
every station he asked a porter if it was
still raining, and on receiving an affirmative
IN hia All 70
not until he had ridden far beyond his
destination that he discovered his mistake
He now thinks as little of English wit as he
does of the English climate.
QUEEN VICTORIA boast of three sons and
four daughters, each with husband or wife,
as the case may be, thirty-one grand
children and six great-grandchildren OF
these the larger part get their support, more
or less expensive, from the English people.
The family seem to have taken desire of
naming their children after the Queen, the
Victorias being as follows: Victoria, Queen
OF Great Britain; her daughter, Victoria
the crown princess of Germany; her daugh-
ter, Princess Victoria of Prussia; Princess
Louise's daughter, Princess Victoria of Bat
tenberg; the Duke of Edinburgh's daugh-
ter, Princess Victoria of Edinburgh: Prin-
cess Christians daughter, Princess Victoria
and the Duke of Connaughts daughter, Prin-
cess Victoria.
WHEN / arrived at the Waterloo Station
London, late this evening, | found large
crowd, attracted by curiosity, awaiting the
arrival of the train, expecting that Mr..
Blaine would be passenger, and they were
sorely disappointed that they did not get
glimpse of him. Many of the crowd had
only very ndistinct idea who Mr.. Blaine
is, for American politics is in England a
sealed book, but some " well-nformed per-
son " stated authoritatively that the expected
visitor was " Sir James Blaine" a man of
great distinction in the United States. The
Britisher has evidently heard the Maine
statesman's popular title of the " plumed
knight and fancies that it is the proper
thing to call him :" Sir" according to the
English custom.-RoJert p. Porter.