Fort Worth daily gazette. (Fort Worth, Tex.) 1882-1891, 1887-12-30
AGE AT WHICH TO WE'D.
A Popular Novelist GA q Nest Inter
estirg QuesfioE-Hsw Mrs.
Mary j. Holmes
Ably Argues In Favor OF Early Marriages.
Some People who should Never
Marry.

Some People who should Mover
Marry.
New York world.
BRooKpoRT, n. Y, Dec. 2.-When
shall our girls and boys marry? is q sub
ject which has been so often discussed,
and concerning which so much has been
written with no very satisfactory result,
that il would almost seem as II the only
rational answer to the vexed question is
that given by some author whose name
do not now recall. "Show me the girl"
WAS her brief comment, and in way that
covers the whole ground. Show me the
girl and the boy; let me know some
thing of their tastes, their dispositions,
their habits, their ideas Of life, and the
manner in which they have been reared,
for these are Of far more importance
than the ages of the parties. A girl who
is thoroughly selfish, who has never
learned that in seeking another's happi-
ness she Is finding her own, who looks
upon her mother as household drudge
of whom she is ashamed, who dawdles
through the morning in Mother Hub
bard and crimpipg pins and runs to hide
if there is ring at the door, who spends
the afternoon IN gossip and the evening
in flirting, is not fit to be wife, whether
she be sixteen or thirty. On the whole
the chances are that the girl Of sixteen
will make the better wife Of the two, for
as the twig is more easily bent than the
shrub, 80 the habits Of sixteen are more
easily changed than those Of longer
growth.
For many disastrous and unhappy mar
riages the mothers are as much to blame
as the daughters, who 80 often enter into
the matrimonial state without q thought
of what that state involves or that as
much will be required of them as of the
husband they have chosen. How many
mothers of the present day teach their
daughters that marriage means far more
than the feverish excitement of the grand
wedding and the elaborate troussesu
which shall Guido the troussesu
and wedding of some rival and
wife will emanate influences for good or
bad which will go on from strength to
strength until they beat against the shore
of eternity's vast sea? do not mean to
be unjust to my own sex and I believe
there are quite as many good wives as
husbands; but also believe that more
gizls than boys marry with mistaken
IDEAS of whist will be expected from them.
| But, as knew I should do in the begin
ming, l have wandered away from the
question-when to marry.
WHEN PEOPLE SHOULD MARRY.
Never, most decidedly, for the girl
who, as an acquaintance of mine once
said, intends TO do nothing "but sit In q
rocking chair and eat molasses candy!"
and never for the Young man who has no
right principle to g ide him, no habits of
industry and thrift, and no deeper feeling
for the girl he marries than that inspired
by passion or pretty face, which will
fade so soon. But to the pure young
girl, who looks upon the marriage
state as something sacred and not to
be entered into lightly or unadvisedly,
and to the pure young man who respects
all womankind and who smesns what he
says when he promises to love and COM
fort and honor his bride so long as they
both shall live, l Say most emphstically,
marry young, before the formation Of
hsnits and tastes and opinions which you
will find difficult TO change and which
must be changed If the matrimonial
wheels run smoothly. Marry and in one
sense grow up together, laying aside self
| and as fsr as possible conforming each to
the wishes of the other, remembering al
ways that he or she who gives up the most
gsins the greater victory.
And just here let me repeat an anec-
dote Of wife of few months who, in
the midst Of her first quarrel, was asked
by her husband which ought to give up
| first, the man who was the head OF the
woman, or the woman who WAS created
for the mar? With smile and kiss
the wife replied: "Neither the stronger
nor the weSker, but the oae who loves
the most"
Brave words these and true, and re-
Ecalled with bitter tears by the husband
VINO, within year stood by the grave OF
the young girl-Wife, who had loved the
NEST.
It is, think, an erroneous Idea thst
early marriages are s hindrance rather
than help to success in life and the men
tai development and happiness of the par
ties. That this is sometimes the case is
true; bat believe that more young man
sad girls, too, have been saved from ruin
fsnd wretchedness by an early marriage
than have been ruined by it. There is
something inspiriting and ennobling in tie
possession of home and family to
work for and beautify, snd if the
girl and boy are poor, should still say,
marry young and work together for the
homegnd the competence, which will be
lsllftbe more enjoyable because they are
hthe result of toll and self-denlsl. Don't
wsi: until you can afford TO begin just
where your father and mother leave OFF,
for then the freshness Of youth will be
gone, and, although 1t may be morning
with you still, the shades will be stretch
ing On towards the MONDAY, and habits
will have been formed which are hard to
break, while the chances are they will
never be broken at oil.
A COMMON EXAMPLE.
"All that I am worth and all the good
there is in me I owe to my wife," is the
verdict of many happy husband who,
hsd he married later, would never hsve
known the Joy there is in toll and sell
denial when shared with another for q
common purpose, or the keen enjoyment
OF 0 pleasure which has been honestly
earned.
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