Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1887-04-28
CURRENT TOPICS.
Jrr,. pAyr. |. oirh,r rear.o,a

| season OF colossal fish yarns NAV
20" % said to have been fully inaugural
Mr.. DRSKwArER was candidate for
recently.
Iowa and Kansas people now put their
distillery. VIZ
| EmrrRoR WILLIAM is hopeful OF contin.
ued peace; still he keeps his weather eve
ON the Car.
TnK worldprobably holds no moro rost
iess or uncomfortable man than tn, crar
OF NIL Il Russias.
kiNo MwANoA, OF Africa, is opposed 20
shelc oiessedness. He Is eighteen years
old and has 1000 wives
| ink production OF pig iron in this coun-
Try ~ now about l31, 900 tons "A week or
greater than ever before.
TnE natural gas excitement in Indiana ia
ON inc increase IL is more than an ex-
citement-it is an uproar.
THE Journal Of Education says: "Ncver
allow child TO use short pencil lead or
state IL spoils the handwriting
The red flag OF the auctioneer has bc-
come unpopular In Chicago since its prom.
inest display as the insignia OF anarchy.
1T Is agreed that the finest pork made In
inc world ~ that OF the Madeira Islands,
where the swine live principally on nuts.
THE low-ncckcd dress must 60" saws
ah exchange. Which way, plcasci 1t
can't well go lower, that is conveniently
In Austria tho full title OF the official
| forest inspector Is kaiscrlich- leoniglich.
Staatseisenbahn holZversorgungsin
| tor.
TnE suppression OF free passes will aug
ment the national stock OF leg muscle. IL
is an i'll overflow that deposits no allu.
vium.
PASSENGER trains, with bath rooms.
barber shops, restaurants, and saloons
arc 10 be put on tho route between Chicago
and New York.
The message Of the Governor OF Mime
sofa is printed in ten languages, repre-
senting the linguistic capacity OF that In.
| teresting State.
ScoTT BAR, Cal, has the tallest post
master in the United States. lie stands
over seven feet in his stockings and
weighs $50 pounds.
POCKETS in dresses are again fashion.
able. The pickpocket is not helped any by
this. What man could ever find a pocket
IN woman's drcssi
IN boring an Rrtesian well at Eureka.
Cal, they found charrcd wood az $50 feet.
ana pieces of she'll aud parts Of the skele-
ton Of n bird at $50 feet.
AN English surgeon says that people who
use rocking chairs the most get deaf the
soonest. Rocking also hurts the eyes and
makes people near-sighted.
A TRAMP Is travelling through Michigan
begging two cents from every person he
meets in order, as he says, 10 buy a post
age stamp TO send letter TO his wife.
THE Foster homestead at Pittsburgh.
where the late Stephen c. Foster wrote
his ''old Folks at Home" is TO be torn
down by its new owner, Mr.. Henry Ham
NOR.
AN unexpected champion for the corset
mas arisen in fashionable doctor, who
declares that the corset is a public benefit.
~ causes all the fools among women 10
die young.
PHILADELPmA has forty-one National
banks and New York forty five The bank
deposits in the City Of Brotherly Love
amount 20 t75,96i 1851, and in Gotham TO
t237, ,l122Os
THE Chicago htey-OceaH says the silence
OF the st. Louis press upon the subject Of
baseball beats Quaker meeting One
can hear ~. Louisan breathe across the
length Of the bridge.
MINNIE BoSD, colored, buried at Fails
Church, Va, few days ago, had docu.
ments 20 prove that she was one hundred
and twenty-eight years old. She remem.
bered General Wsshin gton.
BRIC-A is contraction OF the
French de brie st de broc, ''by hook or by
crook" ION this side and that" II is ap-
| piled TO miscellaneous collections OF odd
and rare articles Of real value.
THERE lives in New Hampshire, or did a
Few months ago, man who once present
cd bill 10 the administrator Of his
1 fathers estate for tho time lost IN attend.
/ ing the old gentleman's funeral
The gross public debt Of Canada on
March 81 was SEQ $40, ifG; net debt. e225..
S65,65l; revenue from sale Of Dominion
lands last year, homestead and pre-emp-
tion sales, t5s9,S4i; leases, sl38,0is
The next convention Of crowned heads
| and princes and princcsses Of the blood
I will be at London a. the Queens Jubilee
I celebration. Victoria IS preparing N en-
tain them in royal style at public expense.
/ A TEXAs steer picked up Miss Louise
/ Danforth, Of 80. Louis. on bis horns.
/ tossed her over a fence into yard. and
/ she stood there and cried because one Of
/ the ribs Of her parasol was broken in the
/ toss.
! CHARLEs r. RUo0LEs, q millionaire ium-
I herman Of Manistee, Mich, is 50 strong a
/ believer in the maxim that cleanliness il
/ next 70 godliness," that he is devotinQ
\ part Of mis- wealth 20 establishing public
/ baths in some Of the larger cities Of the
/ Northwest.
/ We arc told that most Of the Baltimore
water is now swarming with red ana
| white bugs, which are, however. harmless
/ 20 drink. "Bug juice" has been imme-
] MORALLY the slang for a different sort Of
/ beverage, but under present conditions it
must be made 20 apply 20 the product Of
/ the hydrant as well az TO the product o.
I the still
/ DH MERnfNASS, Of the Department Of
/ Agriculture, insists that something must
l be done at once to destroy the English
sparrow or else the curse will grow 70
such magnitude that u viii be necessary
70 draw on the public treasury 70 destroy
t.
Op three sisters in New York, one fias a
jew for husband, another Protestant,
/ and tho third a Roman Catholic. They
met by appointment, says the Time, at the
residence of the latter on Easter sunday
uight The Jewess, presiding at tho piano
I sang the touching Methodist hymn, "hhau