Wichita eagle., 1887-07-27
CLOTHES BY THE HOUR.
How the Impecunious Dude Manages t
Keep Up Appearances to Dress.

"Ah! Chap Is that one Of Fwank's?'
said one of those beings that give strong
reason to believe in the Darwinian theory
the other afternoon ON Chestnut street.
The object addressed was quite as nice an
''if'' as the one that spoke, and the cause
of the remark was one of those coats in
tended for the spring trade but cut short
in its growth by the continued cold
weather.
''Yahs, deah boy. You see, it's bloom
in cold ter-day an made date with
fairy to walk ter-day, an had to do it,
me boy"
"How hawd did he stwike ye chapter
Seventeen cents till 5 O'Clock, an five
cents an howh aftah, but I must be back,
ye know, and the posey cost two cents an
howh an could only bowwah quawtaw
fwom my little sistah." Then they parted
At 8 O'Clock ''Chappie" was seen coming
down the street. He turned off Chestnut
street at Twelfth and went few doors,
rang bell, and entered house The
stroller followed it. In nicely fur
nished back room was seated well
dressed youth of 81 years of age. He
turned out to be "Fwankn All around
the room were hung garments of all
shades and kinds, but all were of the
latest English cut" Here ''Chappie'
carefully took off his coat, after removing
the rose that nestled in the upper button
hole. The bill was twenty-three cents.
"What calm l do faw We, chappie?'
was "Fwank's'' salutation as soon as the
wind had opened the door and cleared the
room.
''Well, this 'chappie' doesn't want any
thing, except to know little bit about
this industry Of yours. Where do you
get these clothes hanging around here,
and is your business tourishing sue
ceSs?'
At first there was an apparent indispo-
sitiOn to answer, but it didn't take long to
make up the little mind possessed, and
few startling facts were developed The
details will not, however, be told in the
silly lingo of the informer
The establishment has been in exist
ence nearly two years, and has been grow
ing rapidly ever since its organization
The proprietor buys all kinds of fashion
able clothing from slender dudes whose
fathers give them plenty. When they
get hard up they go to "Fwank's," and
there they receive very fair price for
their clothing. The cheap dude, that
stands on Chestnut street curb stones and
meanders dOlefully up and down, wonder
ing all day when something is going to
happen to make it rich, SO it can enjoy
life like other ''chaps," or waiting for
some heiress to fall in love with its shape,
is the one that enriches "Fwank." This
branch of the ''genus dudii'' seldom has
more than dollar at one time, but it
must make an appearance. So it goes TO
'Fwank," and there it can get one Of
those dickey top" coats for 10 cents the
first hour and five cents an hour after
On Saturdays and Sundays the price is
raised 90 per cent. Dress suits are hired
in the evenings for 40 cents. 1t often
makes them go broke for week on these
occasions. Trousers can be hired for
from to 8 cents an hour No security
is required. On Saturdays 'FWank' buys
a job lot stock of flowers, and hires them
out in lots ranging from to ) cents an
ur.-Philadelphia Times
couldn't Stand Everything.
ton:
'Say, Uncle Billy, you live in er pretty
tough neighborhood, don't yer?''
Putty tough, Sam; putty tight on Their
slack"
''Do yer ever get in fights?'
ono fights. -
''Whut do yen do when er feller calls
yer a liars'
wall, l think that mebbe he knows
more erbout it than DO, and jest let the
thing rock along"
Yes and spozen he calls yer er thief
''Wa'u, l jes think that mebbe he's
better posted than l am. .
''Spozen he calls you a coward"
81 wouldn't argy with him. -
"Wa'n, spozen he'd say that yer couldn't
tell ther age nv er boss by lookin' in his
mouth
What! me not know ther age nv er
hosss WY, Sam, eff er feller wuz ter say
that, he'd have ME ter whup, right there.
Don't talk ter me, Sam, don't talk ter me,
for it makes me mad ter think about it,
-Tama Herald.