davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1887-06-10
Why Did Tbev I,aUgb9

Bob: g Have you sold your humor-
Gus article to any newspaper yet p
sam: I've shown it to several edi-
tors, but none of them have bought
Bob: Perhaps they don't think il
funny enough.
Sam: oh, yes they do, for they all
laughed. ii -iIexas Siftings.
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1887-06-10
Kill or Cure Remedy.

Customer, in the last stages of bron-
chitis:
tlyo me some rum and gum for
this horrible cough"
Polite bartender: "Try our super
tine rock and rye, and it viii be ended
IN twenty-fCurh hours"
Customer, gasping: " If it's as fatal
as that, I'd rather not"
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1887-06-10
An Odd Contract.

A negro man at Fort Gaines, Ga,
said TO he good farmland, offered
TO make contract for next year on the
fullovir" terms:
Tho faIm.r vas 10 give I'm quart
OF whisky every SATURDAY. rrit. W
ham 30 NJ. ,i., ot Us utui... o. ,5rI.,.av,
and r.,d and clothc LiIn. nd
give him FIVE dollars in cash ON
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1887-06-10
Sweeping Satisfaction.

"What evidence have you that you
are hristian ?" said Mr.. Spurgeon to
a working-giTl.
now sweep under the mats" she
replied.
THAT, said the great preacher, is
sufficient. - Tid-Bits.
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1887-06-10
Too Much Competition in bankrupt,

"Is DOT 50. - asked bankrupt of a
friend, lot SchwinIlcnc hash
failed IN ei- -LEe~s -
I'll. r-I.F was thGt Schwindlemeyer
had not failed, whereut the bankrupt
said enthusiastically:
- am glad Schwindlemeyer wash an
honest man. Der ish too mooch COM
petitions already in dot bankrupt
pishuess."
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1887-06-10
On HI, Dignity.

"Say," called old Mr.. Crotchet 70
the new boy bring me my boot
jack" "
Ny name amt Jack" responded the
boy, quickly, " an l amt got your
boot, neither - Hnrper's Bazar.
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1887-06-10
Familiarity Breeds Contempt.

You know Mrs. Enderson, don't
you, Mrs. Blythe?"
Know her? Of course I don't" :
"Why, I'm surprised. Really, I
thought you were old friends"
Friends! Wen, 7 guess not. Didn't
you know that Ne lived in the sama
house with the Endersons for three
Years p - Cambridge GLASS; Chron-
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1887-06-10
Natural Pride.

Mrs. Pry: "Those Watkinses must be
awfully poor people"
Mr.. p Wis? How so ?"
Mrs. Ply: They never give beggaF
anything-uever!'
Mr.. =. DO you 2"
Mrs. Pry: No but it isn't becauss
1 haven't plenty"
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1887-06-10

Wit from a mans mouth 3 like a
mouse in q holo .rou may watch tho
hole all day and no monse come out,
but by-aud-bv. when no one Is looking
for it, out pops the mouse and streams
across the parlor.
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1887-06-10
An Extraordinary Chnd.

A well-known Mrs. Malaprop IN
Washington society IN speaking CT :
young friend said lately:
Il always felt especial interest in
Mrs. - because she was a post NOR
TEN child. - Washington Chronicle.
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1887-06-10
Smallest FirearIn in the world.

The smallest fireaTm in the world
is a gold watch chain in the form
of q revolver about an inch long.
Cartridges are made for it, and it is
claimed that it could do serious damage
at short range.
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1887-06-10

.,-e .1ry wear, ca7n IN advance 81 81
.t. au 10 not. paid Within o. months "a
#u 20 10 notlputd " tllH r.. rrrs . 90
do tu it not paid wi-utn .ar yrar . Is
se-ra rrr'nus residInE outau;r % Juo county,
I'D cents additional per year viii Nr churvsI To
nay postage,
a.-Tu no event with the above terms he fe-
,.-feF from. and those VINO lion . g nsuI. tr,t-
IEu interests py paying Ia adv1 nee must uas ~
s,f Il. ry gIicrd ~ the same U4ltIuvl furr. vrS,
3S Lot uls ttct be distinctly u.as s-s,..1. RON,
ans HVr ,urwNrI,
as-plv TOR your paper before YOU sfNr. a. 70 st,r
% vT.rusr Np0" NV s"af1v1trs 90 % --eyfs. -
it,u BE- 90 scGuwag-ufe Is fa.. o.. .rrr
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1887-06-10

Business Items. first insertion loo. per line each
gBAssquent insertion SC. per line.
Adm Illustrators and Executors Notices.--.- L %
AuditOT n Otlces... LUZ
stray and similar Notices. $50
- Resolutions proceeding OF dfB CoTDCs .- 20
vOcgefy Il communications GegtQ7Jed 20 cGfi
fiOn G matter Of iIDsitec indiefduGi sElieye
must be paid Tol q advertisements.
JOB PRINTING or all kinds neatly and sSDsdlt-
ously ey ecUted at lowest prices. Don't you forget
The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1887-06-10
Advertising Rates.

The large and reliable circulation o. the CAN
BRIA FREEMAN commends II TO tho favorable con
sderntiOn OF advertisers 81, SO IN gOrs will be in
serted at the following low rates:
Bridgeton pioneer., 1887-07-14

Christians represent. Another hymn
and Rev. H. H. Beadle asked the peo
pie for a contribution that the 800
debt might be liquidated. He said
there were 200 chairs in the house and
that if every one of them would repre-
sent $40 they would have so much
money they would not know what to
do with it, but if they could get IS
from each they would do very well. A
very liberal collection was then taken,
after which the benediction was pro-
nounced, and as the bell tolled, the
congregation filed out congratulating
themselves that they had been so for
tunate as to be in attendance at the
dedication ceremonies.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1887-07-14
Predictions for July.

Devoe makes the following prediction
for the remainder of the month: Sth,
decided change in the weather, with
cool northerly winds, and farmers
should cut their hay; 9th, 10th and
18th, cool, pleasant weather; 18th aud
18th warm and foggy; 18th and 18th,
partly cloudy, with thunder showers;
10th, partly cloudy and pleasant; from
the nth to the 21st will be the hottest
period of the month, with frequent
thunder showers, eliminating on the
s2d with a northwest breeze that will
be greatly appreciated in the cities;
gath, and Goth, decidedly cool, but
pleasant weather; 27th and 2Sth, rising
temperature, partly cloudy Goth and
3Otb. warm and foggy; 31st partly
cloudy, with thunder showers. The
amount of rainfall will be considerably
above the average.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1887-07-14
The Battle Flags.

AT the regular meeting of A. L. Robe
son Post, No. AZ, Grand Army of the
Republic, held July 7th, the following
resolutions were adopted
Notwithstanding the revocation of
the order by the President, the Post
deems it imperative to place on record
it's sentiment
Resolued, That Post No. 42, Dept. N.
j. G. A. r. most emphatically and
without equivocation enters its indig-
nant protest against the removal of the
captured battle flags from the Nations
Capitol to any of the Southern States
whether by order of the President or
any other officer having them in
charge.
Resolued, That we regard the order
to return to the seeding States, the
trophies of Northern valor, suffering
and sacrifice and death as wantom
insult to the dead and an outrage upon
the living heroes of the war, who
fought and bled that the free institu-
tions of America might be forever pre-
served.
.Resolued, That the execution of such
an order shall never receive our active
or even passive approval but that in
every honorable way we will oppose
to the bitter end such miserable truck
ling to disloyal faction that purports
to represent Southern sentiment.
What we won amid the shock of arms
we will retain in days of peace.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1887-07-14
The Flag of Co. A.

1t may be interesting to the friends
of the late Reuben Foster to know that
the flag which covered his remains
while on their way to the last resting
place was the same one which the
ladies of Woodbury., Gloucester County,
presented to Company A, 3D.. Regi-
ment, New Jersey Volunteers, the
company in which Mr.. Foster enlisted
at the beginning of the war. 1t was
brought to Bridgeton by Post Com
mander Jos. F. Franklin, U. T. Allen,
Jos. w. Orr, r. Taylor, who with Benz.
F. Maui, of this city, had the honor of
being members of that company, (twin
brothers of Company F., Cumberland
Grays.) By the request of the widow
the above named comrades acted as
pall-bearers at comrade Fosters funeral
on Saturday. The flag has engraved
upon it all the battles in which the
regiment took part.
At a re union of Company A., several
years ago, it was resolved that here
after when any member of the CON-
pany shall die this flag shall ac-
company his remains to it's last resting
place." and so far the resolution has
been carried out, comrade Foster be-
ing the second one it has covered this
year, since the last annual reunion at
Woodbury..
Bridgeton pioneer., 1887-07-14

About week ago during the very
warm weather, prominent business
man went to his office and took off his
coat and hung it up with the remark
that it was ''awfully hot" After fan
ming awhile he took look at the
thermometer and saw by it that it was
not over sixty degrees. He then re-
marked he guessed it was not as warm
as he thought it was and put on his
coat again. The joke was then ex-
planned to him by one of his employees
who said the thermometer had been
put in an ice box for the purpose of
running the mercury down and fooling
the employee. Then the man was
mad.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1887-07-14
A Faithful Son.

In the Commerce street NJ. E. ceme-
terry is grave, upon the headstone of
which is the name ''Thomas Prowser."
He was a Welshman, and in 1899 an
employee of the Cumberland Nail and
Iron Works, and every morning after
he was through with his labor he went
up the race for the purpose of taking
a bath. But, unfortunately, one day
he got beyond his depth and was
drowned. His body was recovered
and inferred in the grave above men
toned. A few days after this sad acci
dent his widow gave birth to child.
Time rolled on, and the widow with
her son went back to Wales her
native land. The son grew to man
hood and prospered and finally became
a very successful iron manufacturer.
In 1876 during the Centennial, he
came to this country to witness the
great exhibition, and during his stay
he came to Bridgeton to view the
grave of the father he never saw. He
expressed a desire to have the body
removed to his home in Wales, but
was pursuaded not to by the minister
in charge of the church at that time,
owing to the natural decomposition of
the remains, and even of the casket in
which they were inferred. The son
then had the lot put in good repair,
enclosed, and the stone mentioned
placed at the head of the grave. The
son continues to sees to it that the
grave is kept in good order.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1887-07-14
IMPORTANT TO FARMERS
An Act Concerning Fruit
Baskets, Etc.

The Legislature at its recent session
passed an important act entitled, can
act to protect farmers, gardeners and
fruit growers against the loss of baskets
and other packages"
The following is the full text of the
act which should be read by every
farmer in South Jersey. The act be-
came law April 1st, 1857
l. Be it enacted by the Senate and
General Assembly of the State of New
Jersey, That it shall not be lawful for
any person or persons engaged in sell
ing the products of farm or garden,
either ON commission or otherwise, to
allow the basket or other package con-
tanning any of the said products to go
out of his or her possession without first
demanding and receiving a sum of
money equal to the full value of the
said basket or other package; said sum
of money to be refunded to the pur
chaser of the aforesaid products upon
the return of the basket or other pack
age in as good condition as when he
or she received it; provided, the owner
or owners shall have his, her or their
name or names, mark or marks, dis
tlnctly branded, stamped or painted
upon the aforesaid basket or other
package.
2. And be it enacted, That the money
collected on baskets or other packages
not returned shall be paid to the
farmer or owner at the end OF each
month.
8. And be it enacted, That any per-
son or persons who shall violate the
provisions of either of the foregoing
sections, or shall, without the written
permission of the owner or owners
thereof, sell, dispose of, buy or traffic
in, mar or erase the brands or marks
on, willfully break, destroy or other
wise injure, fill or use for any other
purpose than the sale of the original
contents of any of the aforesaid bask-
cts or other packages, shall be liable
to penalty of twenty dollars, with
costs for each and every offense; said
penalty may be sued for and recov-
cred, with costs, by any person in
any court of competent jurisdiction.
A. And be it enacted, That this act
shall take effect three months after
the passage of this act.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1887-07-14

A gentleman from Vineland who is
well up in musical matters, and who
attended the lawn concert, said that
in his opinion, the Bridgeton City
Cornet Band would have but little
trouble in securing the County Fair
prize. He thought there was not a
band south of Camden that could
play with them. He also admir- ed the
pretty production of Charles Lehman
Eight Spot"
Bridgeton pioneer., 1887-07-14
WORKINGMEN

1t is wonderful what some people
can stand. The other day man en-
tered a store just after getting over a
drunk, and called for a bottle of
Jamaica Ginger. The stock of that
medicine was out and he called for a
large bottle of Perry Davis Pain Killer,
and without a moments hesitation
drank down the fiery liquid.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1887-07-14
ANOTHER NEW LODGE.
Myrtle Lodge, No. 33, A. o.
U. W., Instituted.
Big Parade, Fireworks, Etc.

A delegation of some IA members of
Camden Lodge, No. L; Provident
Lodge, No. 4; Fidelity Lodge, No. 8;
Enterprise Lodge, No. 10, Ancient Order
of United Werkmen, arrived in Bridge
ton tonight week, by special train
from Camden. They filed out of the
depot, headed by the Sixth Regiment
Band, one of the finest bands in the
State, and made a parade through the
principal streets. The Lodges are com
posed Of some of the best citizens OF
Camden, and as they passed through
the streets, presented a very hand
some appearance. Coming down Pearl
street, the visitors sent up a brilliant
display of fireworks.
After the parade, the brethren
marched into the hall of Bridgeton
Lodge, No. 1919, South Laurel street,
but owing to the number present, it was
found to be too SMALL and an adjourn
ment was had to the Opera House,
where the ceremonies of institution
and installation were gone through
with.
Some twenty three Bridgetonians
having passed the required medical
examination, We're organized as Myrtle
Lodge, No. 33. Ancient Order of United
Workmen. The following officers were
a. I'd. Mac
man, I. T. Nichols; Foreman, Rev. j.
H. Payran; Overseer, Benz. f. Garri-
son; Recorder, John Perry; Financier,
John w. Hewitt; Receiver, Benjamin
Hancock; I. W., T. H. Dennis; o. w.,
E. P. Seeley; Trustees, Martin Ander-
son, James Calkitt, Isaac M'Pherson;
Medical Examiner, DIR. Theo. G. Davis;
Past Master Workman, B. 7. Bright.
A number of the Grand Officers were
also present from Baltimore, Whining
ton and Camden.
Interesting speeches were made by
the following gentlemen:-J. A. Van
SAINT, Grand Foreman. of Camden;
John w. Diefendorf, Grand Overseer,
Wilmington, Delaware; w. H. Foulk,
Grand Watchman, Wilmington, Della
ware; Past Masters, Cole, Graffen, and
Cobb, of Camden. J. S. Vansant, of
Camden, filled the position of Grand
Master Workman during the exercises
of the evening, and filled it well.
The Ancient Order of United Work
men is comparatively unknown in this
section, but it is an institution that
will grow in public estimation the more
thoroughly it is known. 1t is not an
organization which pays weekly bene-
fits, but first class life insurance so
ciety. Its cost rarely exceeds $500
per annum to each member, and for
this sum he holds a beneficiary GER
tificate, emitting him to $4,000 in case
of death. The new Lodge is under
the jurisdiction of the Grand Lodge of
Maryland, New Jersey and Delaware.
The Order has IL membership of 1885,
900, and is constantly growing. There
is every probability that it will have
u tlourishing existence in this city, and
do large amount of good.
The ceremonies in the Opera House
lasted until midnight, after which the
visiting delegation formed in line, and
marched for the depot where they
took train for home.
MIR. G. II. Davis, of Wilmington,
Delaware Deputy Grand Master of the
Order, who has been working up the
new Lodge will remain in Bridgeton
during the next thirty days and assist
the Society in its work.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1887-07-14

Syracuse boasts of having the big
gest dog in the world. He weighs 203
pounds and measures six feet and
three inches from nose to tail. He is
nearly two years old and was born in
England.
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1887-08-22
a Dangerous Surgical Operation.

A fatal mistake. At the time DR.. Vance.
Of Cleveland, performed the operation on
the lady for the removal of a cancer of the
stomach he found when too late that the
poor woman had no cancer to be removed.
The disease was indigestion. and If she had
taken the Shaker Extract of Roots (Siegers
Syrup that awful distress at the pit of the
stomach. which made the doctors think she
had cancer, would have been removed. Dis
tress after eating. dull. heavy feeling il
the head, with pains in the side and back
all vanish after using this wonderful rem
edy. The tired. languid feeling gives place
to strength and vigor.
Mrs. Della Marsh writes from Pea Ridge,
Benton county, Ark. that she had dyspep-
sia in the worst form for five years. and
that nothin ny gave any relief until she used
the Siegel Syrup.
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1887-08-22
Naval Man-uvers Near Gibraltar.

A very interesting series of maneuvers
by the French Mediterranean squadron
will take place in April There are to be
two distinct operations. The first will
consist in the attempt of torpedo divi-
sion lying under the lee of the island of
Sardinia to intercept a French military
convoy on its way from Toulon to Algiers
The second operation will have peculiar
interest for English naval men. A French
squadron is TO attempt to force its way
through the straits of Gibraltar, a torpedo
squadron barring the passage. The fact
Of the French navy indulging in a sham
fight under the very muzzle of war guns
seems n somewhat questionable proceed
ing In the third operation, the Gibraltar
straits having been forced, the torpedo
boats will try TO prevent the squadron
from entering Brest.
The sight of these latter maneuvers is
oddly selected. Gibraltar is as much an
English military port as Cherbourg is
French, and l do not think that the
French would welcome an English sham
fight within gunshot Of the forts in the
breakwater. The programme certainly
requires explanation. OF course no harm
is meant, but the idea is n violation Of
military rule and precedent. If we lived
in less civilized times, and had not COM
plete confidence III the peaceful intentions
of our neighbors, what guarantee could
| there be that the torpedo boats and squad
ron should not combine and attempt to
| carry Gibraltar by coup de main' The
attention Of our admiralty should be called
| to the matter, and the French authorities
| requested TO choose some less aggressive
| spot.-Paris Cor. London Standard.
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1887-08-22

TherI
world.
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1887-08-22
WHY Is IT

at rheumatism and neuralgia are .
-cydlcnt' This question has not bee
u-tactorlly answered, but it is certa'
L these diseases are not only the mt
Huil but among the most common, n
ne member of nearl Y every family In Il
II is the victim OF one of these DIRE;
rmentors. Ladies seem to be peculiar
,Dle 10 neuralgic attacks, which, in I.
'm OF neuralgic headache, pain III Il
TX, or nervous pains are OF constant O..
grcnce. Not until the discovery of AthI
pros had any remedy been found +
lncr rheumatism, neuralgia or nervo'
'tiache. and they were generally co.
led to be incurable. but AthlophoI
5 been proved to be not only certa
ire for these diseases, in all their vari,
'rms, but a safe remedy. II, in the us
/ Athlophoros, the bowels are kept free.
o'H, its success is certain, and to aid TIN
Nthl"phoros Pills are recommender
ihich, while providing the necessa,
s.thartic, will be found to he valuabI
ii to the action of the medicine. Athl,
'horos is no experiment, it has been teste
al has proved its wonde rful efficacy.
The Athlophoros Pills were original
repared as a remedy for use in connect,
'ilh Athlophoros, for rheumatism al
reuralgia and kindred complaints. Us,
n connection with that remedy, they al
| certain cure for either Of these very cor
non and distressing disc They ha,
rlSo been found to be an invaluable renee
.or any and all diseases arising from vitiat'
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1887-08-22

DR. Bcrnheim, the distinguished physi-
ologist of Nancie, France, goes far in a
paper recently published by him to prove
the well known theory that the mind Of
man in certain pathological state be
comes automatic, speaking and acting by
the suggestion of others without self con-
troll He says that this state of mind can
lie produced by training, and was pro-
duced in the case of Moritz Scharf, OF
Tisza ESlar, who told a long story Of
falsehoods before the court, always in
nearly the same words, accusing his father
of the murder Of that girl Esther DR..
Bcrnheim maintains that the boy MOritz.
by terror and corporeal sufferings. was
tortured into that pathological condition
and then repeated automatically what he
had been taught TO say.-New York Tri-
bunc.
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1887-08-22
@ HOW 10 BE HAPPY.

Are you almost disguised with life. little man,
Iwill tell you a wonderful trick
That viii bring you ccEtsLtment if anything
can
Do something for somebody quick:
DO something Tor somebody quick
Are You awfully tired with play little giriY
Weary, discouraged and sick
III tell you the lovcest gaIn, IN the world
DO something Tor somebody quick:
Do something FOR somebody quick
Though 1t rains like the rain of the food. little
man,
And the clouds are forbilding and thick,
You can make the sun shine in your soul, little
man
Do something for somebody quick;
Do something for somebody quick,
Though the skies are like brass overhead. little
girl,
And the wall like a wcll heated brick:
And are earthly affairs in a terrible whirl!
do something for somebody quick;
Do something for somebody quick
Toronto Mail.
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1887-08-22
Ayers Hair Viqor,

Prepared BY Dr. ] c. Aver 4 Co. Lowell. Mass.
Sold BY pruSsi''. and rerfamer.-
Springfield daily republic. [volume] (Springfield, O. [Ohio]) 1887-1888, 1887-08-22
In Brief, and to tn. Point.

Dyspepsia is dreadful. DiSordered liver
is misery. Indigestion is a toe to good ma
ture.
The human digestive apparatus is one Of
the most complicated and wonderful things
in existence. 1t is easily put out Of order.
Greasy food, tough food, sloppy food,
bad cookery. mental worry. late hours, ir-
regular habits. and many other things which
ought not to be. have made the American
people a nation of dyspeptics.
But Green's August Flower has done a
wonderful work in reforming this sad busi-
ness and making the American people so
healthy that they can enjoy their meals and
be happy.
Remember: NOhappiness without health.
But Green's August Flower brings health
and happiness TO the dyspeptic. Ask your
druggist for bottle. Seventy-hve cents.