The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-12-24

| -GrandnIa's Idea(a slight msunder
standing ng)-Brother Tom says bicycle rid
Grandma says it may be, but she can't FOL
the life of her see how yau would get then
to stay on.
1t is the first business of Prohibition
ist to prohibit common sense.
An oculst is the man who can max,
people open their eyes,
| "A neck-and-neck race-Giraffes.
"A mellow-diamatist-a fuddled play
wright.
| To make a long story short-send it tc
newspaper editor.
There is a great deal of blow about the
Signal Service officers.
The camel has four stomachs. The
greedy boy is apt to envy the camel.
| There are some men who are so op-
posed to anarchy that they will not even
wear red fennel.
This great remedy will ward off, as well
as cure all Malaria Diseases, and for all
Kidney, Liver and Stomach Disorders
stands unequaled. Price SOC. and 81, at
7. ID. Thomas
"A good motto for liniment-All well
that ends swell.
suits. Tailors are not
i don't know anything about cards
and the one who does has heart as black
as the ace of spades.
"Hackmetack," a lasting and iragran.
perfume. Price % and so cents. Sold by
DR.. Horn, Lehighton, and Biery, Weissport
In the chivalrous days of old when they
tried knight they alway selected jury oI
his spears.
When the toboggan season fairly open:
we shall expect to see revival of the song
''The girl left behind me-
Shiloh's Cure will Immediately relieve
Group, Whooping Cough and Bronchitis
Sold by DIR. Horn, Lehighton, and Biery
Weissport
"A lazy man at the state election sen
to South Boston foundry to see if the,
could not cast his vote for him.
1t is not the cloven foot, but the clover
breath that gives man away after he ha
been out to see another man.
Hoods Sarsaparilla cures catarrh by ex
pelling impurity from the blood, which i
the cause of the complaint Give it a trial
-Landlord-Come, Sepp, that is TIN
tenth match I've seen you strike. Wha
have you lost? Sepp-Fm looking for
match that I've dropped on the floor.
Johnny" said the Sunday schoo
teacher, "what is your duty to your neigh
bors?" ITO ask them to tea as soon as the
get settled.
For Dyspepsia and Liver Complaint, yo
have printed guarantee on every bottle @
Shilohs Vitalizer' 1t never fails To cure
Sold by DR.. Horn, Lehishton, and Biery
Weissuort.
Papa" asked little Bobby McSwil
ligan, "what Is a railroad pool?' "A rail
road pool, Johnny" replied McSwilliag
sis where they water the stock"
A Nasal Injector free with each bottle c
Shiloh's Catarrh Remedy. Price so cent,
Sold by DIR. Horn, Lehighton, and Biery
Weissport.
-Ukerdek-I have new scheme on ho'
to get rid of creditors
Chipinone-What is it?
Ukerdek-Pay 'em.
-"What is the reason that rich girls an
so prone to marry coachmen?" asked Me-
ritt. ~ suppose" replied Miss Snyder
'It is because they think they will max
such good grooms."
Baseball is now all the rage in Cal
fornia and many people who expected I
visit the Golden State this winter think {
postponing the trip until the rainy seaso
sets in.
Speaking of the coal business, let 1
keep cool.I is quite easy and much ease
1t was the man who picked up the do
lar which some Que else dropped that m,
with loss.
: blessed are the piece makers" (" said
small boy when dropped costly porcelai
, ornament.
"A long article enti led about Be,
Kegs" is waste of space. The story
told in one word-Tramps.
We always admire what We cannot unde
Z, stand Maybe that is why so many wome
get married.
A.. The carpenter is an unreasonable fe
low. He objects TO plain board, and yet |
don't like board until it is planea.
An aDgler giving an account of tr
to Canda speaks OF fight with a salmo
e We prefer peas with salmon.
-DeSmith- Well, Travis, how are yol
Traris-Oh, I'm robust, How are you
OeSmith-Plain Bust