St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1887-10-30

nature, for it must be remembered that
there are large number of them, and
among this number there are great
many odd characters. Even on one line
alone dozen conductors with marked
peculiaritieS may be found, and a guess
can only be ventured at what trip on
every car in the city would disclose. The
study of street car conductors is really
an interesting one and will amply re-
pays any one who has grain OF fun in
his composition. Among the odd fell
lows already found may be mentioned
the following, and the cases are not at
all overdrawn.,,
A CHESTERFIELDIANP UNCHER.
One of the most gentlemanly con-
ductors in the city may be found Oh a
University avenue car. He is a fairly
goOd-lOOking young man, with an
honest, kind face, and has never vet
been known to say cross word to any
one. Old ladies are his fate, and he out
rivals gentleman of the old school"
in genuine politeness. He assists them
to get on his car with all the grace i'm
aginable, and when they alight his man
ner is simply superb. Not once has he
been known to offend lady by word or
look, and some Of the residents along
the line are so pleased with him that
for his car. Children, too, he likes, and
handles them as carefully as though
they were china. This conductor has a
pleasant word for all who are socially
inclined, and can talk on any subject
with an intelligence that is at once sur
prising and pleasing.
FEELS HIS OATS.
His opposite is conductor on the
same line, and more cordially diSliked
man it would be hard to find in days
journey. This conductor spends most
of his time in brushing specks of dust
from his clothes and staring insolently
at every lady at all good looking who
has the misfortune to ride on his car.
He sports blonde base ball moustache,
and gets himself up as much like dude
as he can and still ''hold his job" He
conveys the impression that he is con-
ferring great favor upon you by allow
ing you to ride on his car, and glares at
you in an ugly way if you want to get
off before the end of the line is reached.
A few evenings ago, two handsome
young ladies had the misfortune to ride
on his car at late hour, and this puppy
tried in every way to make an impress
sion upon them. Finally one mOtioned
to him that she wanted to alight. In
stead of ringing or the driver to stop,
this specimen advanced to the young
lady and asked in his sweetest tones:
"Ah, did you-that is-do you want
me?" The lady, without looking up, re-
piled: "StOp this car, If you please"
"Yes, and do it quick" Clipped in a
broad-shOuldered man seated opposite.
The car was stopped, and the conductor
did not enter the car again until he had
to collect fare.
MENTALLY WEARY.
The most absent-minded conductor
presides over Fourth avenue car. He
is pleasant enough, and all that, but his
Observation-Disclosures is source of great
annoyance to the passengers, some of
whom have been called upon to pay two
or three fares. His main lay is to fer
get that he is conductor and imagines
himself passenger. Then, after ring
ing the bell, he walks up and deposits a
nickel in the old fare box and takes a
seat, looking as resigned as Salvation
army man when bOotblack bowls out
''rats." Three or four times, when a
quarter has been handed him from
which to take one fare, he has handed
back two dimes and nickel, smiling all
the time. When his attention is called
to his mistake he willingly cOrrects it,
and all this without getting angry.
Some day this genius will forget to put
in an appearance at the car barns, and
when he does remember his work he
will find another man "bOssing" the
car.
STRUCK A TARTAR.
The conductor with a hatred for dogs
collects fares on Bloomington avenue
car. He is a muscular, well-built man,