The Arkansaw traveler., 1887-07-30
THE OLD KICKER.
Peck's 5 Sun.


 crosswise. was on it's maiden trip down town, and there was passenger in each seat, when the old kicker was seen half block away, trying to run to catch the car, and swinging his um- brella at the driver, to attract atten- ton. The passengers agreed that each should lay down on seat, and make the old kicker stand up at the back end of the car with the conductor. When he came up to the side of the car. painting, and saw that each seat contained prostrate form, he was in doubt as to whether it was q new form ot ambulance, or patrol wagon, or thought may be the company was running a line of sleeping cars down town.
 Como, you raise np, von shrimp, or will sit down on your hind legs" he said to the grocery drummer, who was snoring on the middle seat. ''You ,lrummers want all there is in sight, and reach into the dark for more."
 ..Powtah," said the grocery drum mer, raising on his elbow and yawn- ing. '.remove this train robber from the car. I was awake when the train stopped, and I could hear the robbers board the cars. When this one accost- cd me I decided to kill him, and l will" and the drummer raised up ap parently half asleep, and reached around to his pistol pocket.
 Hold on," said the old kicker in al ,rm. sT am no robber, and this is not Il rain. This is street car. You mast be dreaming. Don't shoot, l beg of you. I have been shot enough since the Fourth of July began to appear. Be calm, sir" and the old kicker sat down beside the drummer.
 .'Come, gentlemen, get up, said the conductor. "It is near breakfast time and we breakfast at the next station" and the passengers raised up and rubbed their eyes, and looked around at the old kicker as though he was an interloper.
 Talking about shooting" said the old kicker, as he paid his fare to the conductor, "I have come nearer being shot this 4th of July, than ever be- fore in half century of celebrating, and believe the time has come when the Fourth should be abolished
 70, my ge-o-d,' said the insurance man on the front seat. "Listen to the traitor. Palsied be the hand that abolishes it. Palsied be the brain that dictates it. and palsied be the pickled tongue that tongues such an idea.
 "Chestnut," said the floor walker.
 Rats" said the detective
 You red headed anarchist" said the drummer, "would you abolish the only day in the year that has smell of patriotisnl, because some boy fired squib under y our nose and frightened the daylights out of you? Would YOU give up the sacred day that our foretathers fought to establish and died to mantain, because you burned vour fingers trying to head off nig- ger chaser, or because pin- wheel would not whirl and sputter! You are traitor with big T." and the drummer climbed over the back of the seat and sat with the floor walker, rather than te contaminated by con- tact with one so disloyal.
 "It isn't that don't love 4th of Ju- ly, and appreciate what its celebration teaches" said the old kicker, looking around at his prosecutors, "but it IS the way we celebrate it. Thirty or forty years ago we used to celebrate it right. The whole community would get together, after the anvils had been fired in front of the blacksmith shop, and there would be reading and speak ing, and picnicing, and the boys would each have pack of fire crackers, and in the evening there would be public exhibition of few choice fireworks that were not dangerous. We would drink lemonade and eat gingerbread, and go home sober, and not have a headache next day. How is it now! The most dangerous explosives can be bought by children, or drunken per- sons who do not speak our language, and who do not know what they are firing explosives for. It is free for all. and instead of a celebration at given locality, where all fireworks are set of, so all can see them, every per- son goes in on his own hook For two days and three nights, noisy and dangerous explosives are touched oil in the streets, and the man who makes the most noise and does the most damage, takes the cake. Firecrackers as big as a section of stove-pipe, and that make a noise like a cannon, and would blow a child to kingdom come, are handled as carelessly as little, harmless torpedoes are, and the game is to fire them of between the feet or under the chairs of old persons, and ii one can be thrown under the feet of horse hauling a load of women and children, and the horse be made to run away, and kill somebody, the eel