The Lebanon express. (Lebanon, Linn County, Or.) 1887-1898, 1887-06-24
LlMEKlLN CLUB.
Brother Gardner Furnishes wretch Found
Guilty of Stealing an Umbrella.

Brother Gardner Furnishes wretch Found
Guilty of Stealing Umbrella.
Previous to the opening of the meet
ing Brother Gardner. Sir Isaac Wal
pole and Waydown Bebec were seen In
earnest conversation around the prcsi-
dents desk, and when the triangle
sounded IL was pretty well understood
throughout the room that some mat
ter Of gravest Importance was on the
tapis. One individual seemed 10 feel
even more than n lively curiosity.
This was Brother Process Davis. n
member of about six months standing.
He jammed himself into a corner and
tried to appear as small as possible,
and when inquiries were made about
his sore heel he let ON that he had an
awful toothache and didn't want to
talk. Scarcely had the meeting open
ed when he was called To appear at the
presidents desk. The look of terror
which came TO his face as he rose mp
proved that he regarded the matter in
very serious light. aud he shufiled up
the long aisle like one going to an exc
cution.
"Brudder Process Davis" said the
president in very solemn tones. Eat one
of our weekly meetin's last fall, an as
we war about TO disperse 10 our homes.
Sir Isaac Walpoie diskibered dat his
umbreller was missin'. II was an UNI
breller wild n white bone handle. an il
was an heirloom i'm his family. His
gran'fa fadder had walked under dat nm
hralln, 49, ~ Hal lnnt ,ta rain OF hfs
fadder, an he himself had owned IL fur
nigh upon thirty AIRS. lthad been lefl
in kyars an ON steamboats, an on dc
front doah steps. an nobody had took
1t. He had brung 1t down heah two
hundred times, an il war allus waitin'
fur him when he got ready to go home.
At las some one stole it-some human
hyena laid his desecrated paws on dat
sacred reflex an bore il of. We made
ebgry effort to- find il, but de hunt was
in vain. Den we settled down To wait
for Justice. She nebber sleeps. Sh,
sometimes does a good deal OF foolin
around. an dar am sometimes might,
long wait between de ackts, but sh,
nebber sleeps. She didn't go 10 sleeI
dis time. She war lookin' fur you. an
yesterday she oberhauled You. Yol
had Sir Isaac's umbreller under vel
arm. Heah am lie libin' proof to con
| Wet YOU, You are de hyena who stcl,
| it, an YOU are now befo' de bar .
| Justicei Prisoner. how do YOU plead2 P
Process stood there with his moutl
open and could not reply. The suddci
| shock seemed % have paralyZed him
His guilt was as plain as the hind but
| tons on coat
''De pusson who will steal an um
brcller under any circumstances. con
tinued the president, deserves eondin
punishment. In dis case you stole i
from fellow-member of society. an
YOU added dc sin of lyin' 10 your crime
Your name will be crossed of ON
books, an you will enter dis hall II
mo 'foreber. DE carryin' out of lie res
of de sentence am left To Giveadar
Jones an Hercules johnson"
The prisoner was removed Ia tii
ante-room. and about a minute late
Paradise Hall was shaken from roof {
cellar This was followed by buml
ing sound on the stairs leading to tn
alley. and this again by the sound {
fee making a rush for life. Broth,
Process Davis will doubtless remain
Canada during the rest of his life
| Detroit Free Press.