Butler citizen. [volume] (Butler, Pa.) 1877-1922, 1887-05-06

pace, that is. Lor', guv'nor, yor
might 'arness that 'orse to church
you might, an he wouldn't run away
with it"
Bv this time | had descended, and
| cropping my way cautiously up the
gravel path, had reached the front
door. l took out my latch key and
let myself in. 1t struck me that the
lock was somewhat stubborn, but il
yielded, and l passed into the hal, fol.
lowed by my charioteer. The gas
was out and all was dark, save where
a dim light, just darkness visible, in
dieated the position of the window on
the landing 1 felt my way to the
hall table, where on such occasions a
candle and matches were wont to be
placed by my housekeeper, but she
had apparently forgotten them. |
opened the dining room and CROPPED
my way to the mantlepiece, on one
corner of which was usually provis-
ion Of lucifers, but again | was dis
appointed There was nothing to be
done but to find my way to my own
bedroom on the first floor, where on
my dressing table | always kept an
ample supply. Accordingly, with
nearly as much precaution as il l
were attempting the ascent of Mont
Blanc, | began to mount the stairs.
| proceeded as softly as l could, for
being a bachelor, l only occupied
part of the house, aud | did not wish
to disturb my neighbors. | don't
know why boots should creak more
after midnight, but they certainly do
| would not have believed it possible
that halt dozen pairs OF boots, far
less one, could have made such an
atrocious noise. And the stairs, too,
seemed to have joined the conspiracy,
for they creaked and cracked as if the
house was coming down. When
had proceeded seven or eight steps in
this fashion | felt that as man and
Christian | could not 60 any farther
like that. | must take my boots off.
Accordingly, | did take off one of
them, which rewarded my precaution
by falling down half dozen stairs,
with an audible bump at each | was
more successful with the other, and
again resumed my journey, holding
on we'll to the hsndrail, till | reached
the door of my own room. Here the
geography was more familiar, and l
was advancing with calm confidence
to my dressing table when my head
came in violent contact with some
extremely hard substance, which l
instinctively guessed to be bedpost;
4 female voice said in an alarmed
tone: "Is that you Philip" and a
baby began to cry Justify. Now my
name is not Philip, but Augustus; |
sleep in o French bedstead, and |
don't own baby l am not an ex-
citable person, and rather pride my
self, under ordinary circumstances, on
my coolness and presence of mind;
but such a combination in my bed
room at 2 O'Clock In the morning, ac-
centuated by severe blow on the
nose, was enough, | submit, to up
set the equilibrium of even the calm
est of men. l began to feel nervous
i own it. Obviously the first step
toward clearing up the matter was to
get light, and consequently, | made
no reply, but still moved forward in
tie direction of the dressing table.
Instantly there was cry from the
same voice:
"Help! Thieves! Help" followed
by blast, loud aud long, of the most
tremendous whistle | ever heard in
my life. This was followed by the
stund of violent scufie in the hall
beneath, and then some one rushed
violently up the stair and into the
room, exclaiming: Where is he?
Where is the villian?" 1t suddenly
dawned upon me that was the viii
lian, and / put myself into a scientific
posture of self defense, but in vain.
A pair of long arms, apparently
swinging every way at once. beat
down my guard, and after a moment
ary struggle grasped me firmly round
the shoulders.
"pve got him." shouted the pro-
proprietor of the arms. "Now, Eliza,
throw O blanket over his head while
| hold him.
There was monetary pause, and
the voice said in q tone of muffled ex-
postulation: Take care, Liz, that's
my head you've got hold Of" The
apparent mistake of identity, however,
was speedily corrected. a woolly
mass descended over my head, and |
was borne, half suIfocated to the
ground have vague general i'm
preston of somebody sitting upon
me, but here 1 may be mistaken. 1t
must not be supposed that | submit
ted tamely. On the contrary, con-
tinued to roar. "Murder!' "Fire!"
"Thieyes!" and "Police!" as loudly
as a mouth full of blankets would let
me. The baby, not being hampered
by similar impediment of speech,
roared still more Justify. My in
presssion 80 far, as | was able to
think ut all, was that | had somehow
interrupted the proceedings of gang
of burglars engaged in rifiing my
apartments, though even then | won
dered (and | think the fact is some
proof of my presence of mind) why on
earth they should have brought
Eliza" aud the baby with them. l
also remember wondering how many
minutes it usually took to suifocatc
anybody with q blanket, when l
heard another person rush up the
stairs and enter the room A CLEAN
of light shonc through my blanket.
We've collarcd the cabman," said
strange voice, ''and my mates
watchin' him down stairs. Have
you got the other one, sir?"
Eyes, here he is, with q blanket
over his head, and the sooner you can
get pair of handouts on him and
lug him off to the station the better"
Handcuffsl Stat!onl Then some
body, it appeared, took me for the Of