The Valley Virginian. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1865-1895, 1887-05-05
His Dream Dispelled.


a censmship soundsvery big till you get
there. There are Inndaierabla islands in
the South Paoillc, and tribes who declare
war. fight, pfeclains pfoelamations Of def
ance, and seem aitpgather extraordinarily
heroic. The United States sent a consul
to one group lately wherein The IDEAL was
grand-itnmense. Kneelng subjects in the
shape Of American citizens, suppliant
chiefs aud trembling kings. with all the
attendant gorgeousness and dignity, Glled
his mind Is eye. lie busted = himself on
AN outfit, laid in an elegant dress suit, a
pair Of patent Heather shoes, white lies,
white gloves, and an enormous diamond
pin for his shirt front. Thusequipped, he
sailed away with all the conscious pride of
a representative Of a grand republic. From
the port he landed at he was conveyed in a
small sailing vessel to the point Of oflicial-
dom. AS the ship entered The ofling. the
flag ef the United States gayly flying at
the masthead, the white residents of tfie
island came off il q small boat to welcome
bi4n. The lieW oticialreceiqed them affa.
bly quite amiasle and did not put
ON too many airs.
Come on shore with US and Wen pre-
sent yoUto the.lSing, said the welcomers.
E The king | can't go W to The palace
IN this dress. Ny trunks are IN the hold.
| can't present nyself.to the King like
this
Oh, come with us; that s alright, you
can put on al your finery and call on him
again. Hes waitlng for YOU
Waiting for me ~
Yes; NC told him the consul was com
.isg.''
And he's waiting forme don know
what to do. Iean'tkeep His Majesty wait
ing, but can hardlygo up in this dress. J"
Oh, that will do. He WON'T mind.
And they tumbled him intothe boat ard
to5k MN Oh shore. IL you We ever tried 10
step out of a boat on a shelving beach you
know how tits yourself He did.it He
stepped clear into the water and went roll
ing. Here was a quandary. The residents
gathered the wet consul-up, took him to
store ard got him intoa $12 hand. down
suit, which didn't fit him. It took a long
time to argue him into going then But
they would have it, and off they went.
Look here don't feel comfortable at
I'll going Up to the palace TO make my first
appearance as consul in this miserable con
dillon. Where is tie palace? Are we near
it ?''
Quite There it IS .
lie looked and saw a conical mud hut
with two square holes on opposite sides,
and a gentle smoke foated up through the
point Of the roof: which was apparently a
vent hole.
What 2
That s epalaee. The king ana queen
are in there waiting for YOU.
They entered. IN the center, in what
locked ike q kind of mire, sat q fat, black,
digHifed fellow. whose protection from the
inclemency Of the weather was wisp of
coston tied around his waist. by his side
SAT q small. dark lady Of acquiescent, con
seuted nein, whose toilet had all fallen
around her waist. too; at least she hadn't
any anywhere else.
iI,llo /" saidthen new conner in the lar
guags of the country. I" Hullo, old chap,
how are yoa? Thenmore politely, s This
is tie new consul from America.
Thenew consul, who had been practising
his bow ever since his application mad been
fled. made an obeisance when q pig sud
denly ran in by one entrance, skipped be
tween his genuleebion landed him head
first in the m1re and skipped out by the
opposite hole in the hut. All dignity was
outraged, but the king didn't mind it, nor
did the numerous royal family who lay
around promiscuously without any toilet
at all.
That S all right. old boy, said the resi-
cent, to the embarrassed consul. We've
got up d ballfor you TO night, and you'llsee
the king and queen in style there.
So the consul got his trunk out, got his
dress suit. his. white tie, his white gloves,
and Aispatent feathers ready and presented
himself at the hotel where the BAH was
to be. The hotel was a wooden frame with
a mud roof. TIE king and queen entered
in grand style, with a little more toilet CT
a loose kind. and the new consul came in
Will. She king sister, a noble princess, and
they all had aroyal nightofit. Before the
new consul had gone to led in the morn
ing the princess royal returned from the
palace, paid him specialcall and solicited
his washing, He does not look for any
dignity in his position now. Heis locking
for profit. A man ought to gain some
thing from being a consul. San francisco
Chronicle.