The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1887-10-13
The Merry Side +!

during the Reunion.
We propose debate between Walter
T. Mills and John Seitz.
49,
No wonder they want big drill in Chi
cago-it's great place for wheat.
80
Denis Kearney has come east-but he
won't hang around Chicago very much.
The Clevland-Lamont Combination
showed to an immense crowd in Chicago.
Mr.. Powells speeches will be more
pointed from now on. Chestnuts are ripe.
A Boston actress robbed a Minister'S
house. Now he mourns his winters sup
| ply of baked beans.
There's as much difference between the
parties as there is between the eagle and
| the coyote.
The hunting season is about here. The
whole Democratic party is already after
grounding.
Our worst fears are realized. The Pres
ident has developed into public speaker.
That settles him.
Two Maine men paid three thousand
dollars for killing three deer. They will
buy side-bacon hereafter.
Accepting the recent census as true,
Jackson could all live in the Nail Mill
and have plenty of room.
While Chicago was showing off before
the President, it would have been good
time to hang the Anarchists.
Cleveland got rid of the Chicago people
at the rate of forty-seven minute. He
will even beat that time next year.
The Presidents tour suggests practice
they used to have out west, of hauling
man around in a cart before hanging.
-
Sam Jones delares he "wants to die at
home" And suffering public wishes to
the Lord he would live at home, too.
-
Dan Lamont will never lack employ
ment after Growers time is out. Side
show managers are always in demand.
-
A man never gets so low but that he
has friends-and man never gets so
high but he can make fool of himself.
-
Rather ungenerous in Uncle Sam, to in
vite his British friend to come over and
take cup-then refuse to give it to him.
"Lessen the taxes, is the platform of the
Democratic party [Chillicothe Adver-
tiser.
You mean after they are collected, don't
you
DIR. Leonard intimates that none but
followers of himself can get to heaven.
We hadn't thought of it before as lonely
place.
1t would have been sorry night for
Cleveland if somebody had lain one of
Foraker's speeches on the track. He
couldn't have gotten over it.
When you hear man say "you can't
go to Heaven unless you think as do"
remember that there are angels waiting
to get kick at that fellow.
80
Bessie Samson. an actress in Cincinnati,
is said to have "a wonderfully expressive
nose" That's nothing remarkable for
Cincinnati.
The benevolences of this country are
stupendous- millions for missions" to
the heather abroad, and-millions more
to prosecute the heather at home.
The Democratic management in the
State campaign want a certificate of good
character. If they can write one out,
Cappeller ought to sign it.
"If you don't vote with me you're hyp-
ocrite r says an enthusiastic politician.
We reply, we'd rather be hypocrite con-
ditionally, than to be one absolutely.
When you meet the small boy, now, with
mouth like an auger-hole, don't get mad.
He's not making mouth at you-he's
been eating green persimmons.
-
A public speaker geneally praises the
intelligence of his audience. They're
smart, you see, or they wouldn't come to
hear him.
A New York Surgeon successfully 10
Gated bullet in mans liver by means
of telephone probe. It's smart Doctor
nowadays who can locate mans liver.
Great men in this country "swing
around the circle" just thesproprietor of
a circus rides in front of the "steam pi-
amer"
Fred Mussey doesn't report Cleveland's
speeches. He reads them in the Ameri-
can Encyclopedia. Fred says so, and like
a true journalist he can't lie.
80
The report that one of the ladies of the
Presidential party tainted during the
Presidents speech in Chicago, is pro-
nounced untrue. Nobody would have
thought strange if she had, but she didn't.
The Portsmouth Times raves at Gen.
Grosvenor for saying that the Grand
Army of theRepublic is bigger than Pres
ident Cleveland. Why? The G. A. r.
reaches clear across the country, and the
President is only five feet wide.
"There's no difference between the par
ties on the Tariff Question" says DEM
ocrat. If you will wait until this time
next month you'll see some fifteen to
twenty thousand difference.
What The Democracy the friends of
the farmers? Didn't whole army of
Democrats go through Southern Ohio, a
few years ago, shouting for Vallandig-
ham and stealing every farmers horse
within reachp
at is a remarkable fact that the Demo-