Bismarck weekly tribune., 1887-02-04

y
more balls to be p0cketed in the first game
and the three artistic sports will begin up
on the task this evening, with seconds and
referees and large audience.
AMONG THE CANDIDATES.
PRAIRIE BLAST, OAK, Feb. 80.
DEAR GOVERNOR: After skirmishing
around among the candidates to secure the
secretaryship of that commission of which
spoke to you, must go to you for little
information. 1 know from what have
been told by the candidates that you have
MT much to say about appointments, but it
won't do me any harm to know what you
think about the probable results. I have
secured position as heavy editorial writer
on the Prairie Blast Howler, and the can
didates have a good deal of respect for me,
but I am unable to decide as to which
should support to be on the winning side.
When in Bismarck, the other day, 1 talked
with the candidates, and am now con-
vinced that after you make your appoint
ments great many men will think you
have a very poor appreciation OF ability
and worth. and that your good Judgment
has gone out on a vacation.
/ spoke to Colonel Sure-to-get-there a
candidate for the office, the secretaryship
of which | desire, and asked him
how his case was progressing.
II can't see anything in the way of my
success" replied the candidate as he
smiled serenely and handed me cigar
Il say "cigar" through courtesy.) "You
see, the governor must recognize GER
tain influences. HecannOt ignore such pol
iticians as Colonel Big Gum and Major
Political-leader; nor can he snub Captain
Influence. have secured the endorse
ments of these men and they will stand by
me. l cannot see any reason for his refuS-
ing to appoint me, and (confdentially) you
Won't lose anything by standing by me if
the other fellows make fight. Here's
another cigar"
This made me feel good and soon met
Colonel Never-let-up, candidate for the
same office, who was glancing over the
batch OF endorsements which arrived by
mail and wearing all all-wool satisfied
air.
swell, Colonel what do you think of
your chances for appointment" :" I asked
We'll, haven't been saying much, but
between you and me-" said he, "Pll be on
the Dand-wagon when the procession
moves"
"Then you think your chances are
good 2" asked.
confidentially, as he leaned toward me
and gave me a large Limberger havana
"The governor must stand by the men who
can do him some good, and whose support
will guarantee him harmonious admins
tration. Now there's Commodore Always
on-tOp and General Neverdowned, who
carried the campaign in '84 They're both
heard. Then I've just received rafting
endorsements from Major Wirepuller and
Admiral Responsibility, and [Whisperingl
between you and me, they're going to have
something to say. See?'
"YOu seem to be pretty we'll supported"
| remarked respectfully, thinking that at
last had met the man whose favor
should court.
well, now," said he with friendly
wink, "keep quiet and watch my smoke.
I've told you this for your information and
handing me second cigar] if you want to
give me nttle send-of you'll lose nothing
by it in the long rum"
man who was to get the office. and seeing
General Persistency, the third candidate for
the same place, in lonely corner of the
hotel office, | went to him in sympathy.
wondered what kind of a chump he could
be to be hanging around without any hope
for success, and I thought l would give
spending all his money for board. 1 asked
Persistency how long he was going to stay
and whether or not there was any prospect
of his appointment.
"Why," said he, his face lighting up like
a FREELY in June, don't say anything about
it, but I'll tell you on the quiet that I've
got the dead immortal sinch on the appoint
ment, unless some new fight comes up in
politics. You can depend on one thing,
and that is, certain influences have got to
be recognized by the governor"
L nodded my assent to his statement and
told him 1 had become thoroughly CON
vinced Of this fact From what had been
able to learn I would have bet my farm and
recognize Certain Influences whoever that
might be.
Nov, there's John Grangerfrend, who
controls the farmers" said Persstency as
he looked wise and whispered; "That man
MUST be heard. Here's an endorsement
from Colonel Corporation, too; so you see
Eve got both extremes, and the governor
will have to do something for them. And
that's not all [ChuckIingl Why, I've
got Sergeant Economy, the peoples friend,
and Joe Rustler, who's a dandy in cam
paign; and Major Heavyweight and Gen
eral Hellovaman have both spoken person.
ally to the governor, in my behalf" And
that would lose nothing by giving him a
friendly notice in the Prairie Blast Howler.
OF course, governor, as 1 said before, you
will have very little to say in the matter,
but if you will tell me which of these en-
dorsers you can ''stand in' with, or to use
better English, which Of them will per-
NIT you to be his friend and give you an
opportunity to appoint his man, you will
enable ME to turn the mighty violence of
the Howler in the right direction.
Do you know this man Certain In
auence," and can he be approached?"
Yours in sympathy,
IRA SWAIN.