The Milan exchange. (Milan, Gibson County, Tenn.) 1874-1978, 1887-08-20


One Sunday they wuz big meetin' a
few miles off N we all went shet
Bruno up in tn corn-crib n
thought he'd stay there all
right. He cried N whined when
he see US all goin' t leave him-he
liked company better'n most people n
hated worse'n pizen t be shet up We
stayed till most night, n when
got home mother opened tn door-she
wuz ahead O. the rest NV us-'n jest
stopped n held up her hands n sed;
Mercy on me! Who's bin herer N
there wuz tn awfulest mess you ever
saw. Looked like they'd bin atornado
turned loose N tn house. All tn
chairs were turned over n layin' every
which way, N every thin else N tn
room wuz mixed up N some o them
broke. N all over the floor wuz marks
o BARS feet, n the marks wuz all
sticky. One O. tn windows wuz open,
n all round it wuz marks O. bars feet.
They went upstairs, too, n mother
knowed in a minute whose feet he'd bin
there; n soon's she got over her sur
prise she begin ter git mad, N jest
flew upstairs. Things there wuz
bout ez they wuz downstairs, but
she didn't see any Bruno, till present
ly she heard a kinder groan, n looked
roun', N finally she see big bunch in
one o tn beds n turned down tn cov-
ers-'n there wuz Bruno, sure 'nough,
jest plastered all over 18th maple-sirup,
N lookin' so shamed and kinder sorry
t mother'd laughed f she hadn't bin
so mad at tn state she found things,
specially her best bed fer company. 1t
w jest nacherly ruined tween tn ma
ple-sirup n tn bar When we come
ter CIPHER it all out it w plain 'nough.
Thet blamed baird got out o the corn
crib. Then he come moseyin' round
tn house t find some body t play 18th
him, n not findin' nobody he'd gun
down suller t muse himself He'd got
t foolin' round tn barrel o. maple
sirup till he'd got tn faucet loose N
tn sirup come a-pourin' out. Then
he'd jest put his mouth t. it N drunk
till he'd got plum full, N all tn time
he'd been a-paddlin' in the sirup a-run-
min out on tn floor till he'd got daubed
all over 18th it. Bimeby he'd got sick
18th so much sweetnin', N then he'd
climbed in through tibet open window
fer sympathy, N he'd pulled down bout
every thin in tn house tryin' t find a
doctor. N when he couldn't find any
body he'd nacherly gone up Stairs t
bed, like any invalid-he'd tuken many
a nap in mothers beds afore, n no
amount o whippin' d ever cured him
o tn trick, n so mother found him
there, the sickest bear you ever saw.
Well, that wuz TIL last O. Bruno. TIL
rest o tn family sed he made most I'M
common good eatin', bein' so nice N
fat, but | never had tn heart t find
out, m l never had an other pet b ar. +"
"Were there any panthers in the
woods where you lived, grandpap"
asked one of the boys, after the bear
story had been well digested.
PLENTY, plenty o painters, but they
didn't come round ter git acquainted
very much, though. One O. those
blamed varmints did come once, m we
had all we wanted, eff he didn't stay
long-that, is, till he begun ter stay,
cause he could help himself. One fall
father N mother left us young folks
alone, N went off ter tn next settle
ment ter Methodist quart'ly meetin' -,
N Civ my next oldest brother general
charge O. tn family. They wuz gone
three nights. We wuzn't afraid n
he'd purity good times keepin' house
'thou't amy bosses. But tn third
night, long bout midnight, we heerd
a cry like child's, n purity soon it
came closer N closer N Tige n Bose,
our two big dogs, they gunter bark n
ih"hO " Us luS' VI " SOOH ADb, my
biggest brother, got up out o. bed n
sed he knowcd that wuz a painter come
up into tn clearin' ter git one O. our
yung pigs, N fer his part he wuzn't
gOin' ter stand no such thievin'. Eff
that painter wanted fresh pork he'd
got ter fight fer it, Pigs wuz pigs, l
tell We, N them days n mighty scarce
N kept close-that's tn reason tn
pig pen wuz so close t tn house. l
wuzn't only small chunk o. bow.
but | thought Abe was about right, N
/ said I'd help. So we got down faith
er's big rifle from tn deer-horns
over tho tse-place-it w alters loaded
m STEPPED out careful into the ward.
1t wul bright moonlight, n we could
see tn dogs jumpin' round under a bic
tree tibet father'd left standing near tn
house so s to give a shade, their hair
jest standin' up straight, n both mad
S they could be. They wuz old hunters