Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1887-03-30
Mr.. and Mrs. Bowser,


furniture, his taste, and all that, just
rs if he had never heard of me. The
other week, when the cook walked off
at half an hours notice. and Bowser
came home to find dinner half an
hour late, he crossed his hands under
his majestic coat-tails, walked up and
down like some great lord, and finally
said
"Mr. Bowser, it's the fault of your
management know that this kitch-
en- can be run on the same system as
a bank, and it's got to be done Yes,
got to be done, Mrs. Bowser,"
YOU'D better run il then I" l re-
piled.
$50 l will, madam !"
That day he advertised in the pa
pers, and after supper the girls began
arriving. Mr.. Bowser seated himself
in state in the parlor, and l showed
them in. His manner and speech
were about the same in sach case.
"Young woman" he began, "are
you naturally neat, systematic, accu-
rate, honest, capable, willing, indus
trious and handy"
Eyes, SIR"
"Can you give bonds in the sum of
$4,000"
mo, sir"
"Then / do not want you !"
He was home all next day, during
which time about twenty girls called
and were sent away. He finally got
tired of the bond question, and accept
ed a girl and chanced her integrity.
Before proceeding to show her to the
kitchen, Mr.. Bowser loftily observed t:
"Young woman, your path of duty
will lead you all over my house, and
you will be expected to do your work
in a cheerful manner and to my sat
isfaction. | want perfect system in
everything, from peeling potatoes to
using up exactly three pounds of but
ter per week. We will now make an
examination of the quarters you are
to occupy"
He escorted her to the kitchen and
showed her an egg beater, a bar of
soap, n horseradish crater and Gel
cry dish, and informed her that he
would, perhaps, furnish her with
tack-hammer in case she wanted to
throw herself on some new French
dish. He charged her to be up at
exactly o'clock in the morning, and
to ring the bell at exactly Z, and to
have the table cleared off by s, and
then came in and said to me
"Mrs. Bowser, this house is to be
run on a system after this. You won't
know the place by tomorrow night"
ado you think the girl will stay!"
l yentured to ask.
"Stay tell you, the whole trouble
about the servant girl question lies in
the fact that you women are no man
ayers. That girl will remain here
twenty years, unless sooner discbarg-
ed"
did she seem pleased p
PLEASED /? Well, l should smile
A girl knows when she has u compe-
tent boss"
Next morning at u quarter to 8,
Mr.. Bowser suddenly awoke and
jumped out Of bed. That bell, which
was to be rung at 7 o'clock had not
aroused us. We hurried out to the
dining room, but the table had not
yet been set. We entered the kitch-
en-, but there was no fire.
"Mr. Bowser," l said, "your system
seems to be out of gear"
He made no reply, but hurried up
stairs, and / heard the following con-
versation
Bowser-"Jane! Janew
Girl-"What is it?"
"Do you know what time it is ?"
"Yes."
"And why amt you down stairs p
IL never get down until g."
But didn't l tell you to get up at
6|
"Odds is the difference if you did.
don't take orders from an old hen
hussy!"
He marched her off as soon as she
came down, and, because he saw a
grin on my face, he exclaimed
"Don't think Pm beat, Mrs. Bow
serl I'll cook breakfast myselfp
He broke some eggs into a cold
spider without using any butter, and
they burned fast. He put his coffee
to steep in cold water, and settled it
with some of the fried egg. He put
the butter OH in fish platter, broilCd
the mackerel without soaking, and
his Saratoga chips and pancakes got
mixed up in some strange way. He
went off without saying anything, and
that afternoon | hired girl and had
good supper awaiting him.
Mrs. Bowser," he said, as he lean
ed back in bis chair and sipped his