Charlotte messenger. [volume] (Charlotte, Mecklenburg Co., N.C.) 1882-18??, 1887-05-14

perpetrated the bull: "Sir, she was man
enough to resist Russia" and another
leader said: The voice OF England,
which sounded so clearly at the last
general election, would not be lost sight
of."-Rd,ts News.
After the clerk had pulled down ev-
erything in the store without satisfying
his customer, o woman, she asked him
if there was anything else he had not
shown her. Yes, ma'am," he said,
''the cellar; but il you wish it l will
have that brought up and shown to
you. "-Lot0cH Citizen.
'You know am about to marry
Mile. X. She Is impossibly ugly. ad-
NIT, but think Of her dowry-500. 900
francs. / shall simply wed her with
my eyes shut" "Yes, my dear fellow,
and you will do well never to open them
again. French Fun.
young man," said the stern parent
to the applicant for his daughters
hand. "are you sure you can support .
familyP" III wasn't m-making any
calculations on that" stammered the
young man; Il only want the girl. you
know."-Rttsburg Dispdtch.
Ethel (reading)-A brute Of = Mem
phis man recently enticed young heir
ess into tho house Of q blind clergyman
and at the point Of . pistol compelled
her to marry him. Maud (who has
been reading the London Court Jour
nGD-How delightfully."- EnglishI
1t is next to impossible for . man 10
teach girl to whistle. When she gets
her lips properly puckered she looks so
bewitchingly tempting that he loses his
head and kisses her. and the conse-
quence il she doesn't have . chance to
blow note. = Cambridge Chronicle.
Mrs. Maloney's boy Of 4 years was
beating the cat with . rolling-pin.
Tears Of pride came into her eyes a.
she murmured: Poor darlin'; you
make me reminder yer father that's
dead an gone, ~ he was when be was
jist appointed on the force "-LoDeII
Citizen.
Miss Clara with . sigh) do you
know, Mr.. Featherly. that for some un-
known reason feel very blue tonight
Mr.. Featherly (anxious to say the prop
or thing, but somewhat Al loss) well
--er-Miss Clara. blue, you know. is
very becoming to your complexion
Harper's Basdr.
Reginald. dearest, father has at last
told me that we may be married early
in January" "What has changed his
mindP" '.Some benevolent friend sent
him fashion paper which says that it
Is no longer in good form for the father
to give a check to the bride at the we'd
ding. "-Boston Record.
A machine has been invented which
will sew on buttons ~ fast as seven
girls could do the work, but when It
comes 10 sitting up Of . Sunday night
with young man seven machines cam
begin 10 do the work Of one girl There
Is no fear Of any invention driving the
girls out Of market et--Detr0U Free Hess.
A bold. bad boy in Illinois thrust cou-
pie Of plugs Of tobacco into big Jug Of
whisky he found in the horse-shods DUR
ing church supper. And the next day
the loral physicians reported seventeen
cases Of ice-cream poisoning. all men.
and the poor women who made the ice
cream cried their innocent eyes out
about it--Bnrdetfs.
MARY Jane Derksr' What ma 'nmP''
''What b you a-doin'p" "Eahn' pie,
ma'am." what bo You n-eatinf Il
wlthF knife" so you bel Now.
what have l told you about saiin' pie
With your knlia Mary {anel xske