Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1887-04-15
MR.. AND MRS. BOVSER
BY MRS. BOWSER.

may have heretofore mention
ed the tact that Mr.. Bowser and /
do not agree as to how baby
should be oyNught UP. | think he
is very unreasonable father III
various Instances. He came home
one day when baby was only )
months old and found hIm crying.
"Nlrs. BowSer, that baby'S got
cornS." exclaimed Mr.. 3owser, as
he hung up his hat.
"COrns -
eyes, corns! You act as il you
never heard of cOrns. Put him
down while | examine his feet"
"The idea! Who ever heard Of
baby 3 months old having
cornsY
"There's good deal in this
world you never heard of, Mrs.
Bowser. Put the young 'un down.
He examined the baby's feet,
pulled his toes apart, and of course
he didn't find any corns. | knew
he wouldn't.
"Then what is he bawling aboutp
he persisted.
"Babies always cry more or
less"
"They do. ell ? Well, If this one
doesn't cry less III find some way
to make him. ] shall hold him
responsible from this day OUT
Our baby had bad the hives, as
every other baby has. Mr.. BOwser
came home and found me holding
the child and mother preparing
some warm drink. There were the
blotches and pimples, but baby
wasn't even iretting.
"Whats the matter of thatyOung
monkey now" demanded Mr.. Bow
ser as he caught sight Of the PIN
pies.
"Only the hives, my dear
"Onlyl Have you had the doe
tor"
"Why, no. There's no need of
DOCTOR"
"Isn't there Mrs. BOwscr, that
may be hives, and it may be small
poxl 1t looks more like the latter
disease to me. If that young 'un
has gone and brought the smallpox
into this house | warn him to look
out for HIMSELF I'm a loving hus-
band and a fond father and all
that, but propose to draw a line
with my children. | shall draw it
at smallpox"
"Mr. Bowser," said my mother,
"yOu should not get unduly excit-
ed. This child has yet to 60 through
with measels, chicken-poX, whoop-
ing.cough and several other kin
dred diseaes or ailments
"IIe has ell He proposes to
keep this house upset for the next
eight or ten years, does he? Meyer
I'll lug him out this very night
and leave him on somebody's door
stepw
Baby was ) months old before Mr..
Bowser suddenly discovered one
morning that he was bald-headed.
He was holding the child at the
time, and he rolled him into the
crib and called to me from the foot
of the stairs:
"AIIs. BOwser for heavens sake
come down here as fast as you
can =
"What is it.7 | asked as hur-
ried down.
"Why, this Internal young un's
bald.headedl" "
SIS that all! Why, | thought
you had dropped hlmw
as that allw Isn't that enough.
Tie might as well die at once
Think of the ridicuIe that will be
heaped upon my child from the
very hour he is able to tOddle to
the door! Grown people will take
him for a dwarf, and will yell
Bald headed Bowser y at him.
Imagine our feelings as we hear the
street gamlns shout. eOld Bow
ser, where's your bald head y And
it has come to this"
"Give the baby "a chance, my
dear"
"Chance Chance Haven't
given him every possible show
since he was born7 Hasn't he beer
the direct and only cause Of my
losing fifteen pounds weight in foul
monthsN
''But his hair will come out
He'll have a good head Of hail
when he's a year old"
"Oh, he will! Yes, if he knows
what's good for him he will He''
my child, of course, and of cours,
I've got the feelings of father
but sooner tha have him grow NJ
a bald head, I'd abandon and dis
own him "
One day soon after that / fount
baby's scalp red and irrItated, ant
the cook inf ormed me that she saw
Mr.. Bowsel, fussing around tn
crib. cal led him in from the bacl
yard and charged him with sIniste
| Joeic,ne ord knayv from his pullt-