Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1887-09-23
OUR KALI ..nnr..

"eX-speaker."
There is owe thing which tfa amuse
ment lovers of this county would par.
ticularly like to see, aud that is It cyclic.
rama of II cyclone.
1t is said that sueezug has become fash
ionable in certain cucie-. Good tho
time has gone by, then, when Il fellow
must clutch his nose aud strain enough to
lift Il barrel Of -four ov,ra Aae, ia o der
to keep from startling { he company.
A decline in damon when young
lady refuses to accept an engagement
ring
The latest fashionable bonnet orna.
mentation is dried seawee1 Thr!fty wo-
men have brought home truuhfli, Of it,.
this summer.
Mrs a. VI. Hollowa, OF luiIalo has
been awarded the contract for cleaning
the streets of that cry for five years.
Every citizen will now be expected to
wipe his boots after going over Il street
crossing.
A New York policeman detected the
presence of Il thief in house on hi. beat.
Thereupon he proceeded to beat jattoo
on the pavement with his club until he
had summoned all the officers within the
radius of half IA mile It was am over
whelming surprise to the brave and Eff
Gent stone-p FOUNDER TO find that his music
had frightened the thief away.
1t is a remarkable fact about the moon,
and calculated to inspire considerable re
spect for that heavenly body, that even
when it is completely tull it never varies
from its orbit "A hut y : breadth
The sophomores OF a Western college
have got themselves into trouble by
painting all over the seats devoted to the
freshmen, Just for green's"
"5ome gentleman in the audience has
lost his head" exclaimed an unpopular
! lecturer, as a cabbage, at ended by a dead
cat cam" on to the piAllorm. The laugh
was Oh the cabbage head
It's never too late to mend-eXcept wher
the cloth gets too Old.
When you see man trying in vain to
uproot a lamp post you may be sure OF
Que of two things either the post is tieht
or the man is.
Prof. f. A. Marsh says that we spend al
least $l00,000090 paying printers and pub
fishers for sprinkling our books aud apers
with silent letters That may be true
enough, yet we spend twice the amount
paying milliners for spriukling our wo-
mems hats with useless gewgaws fur
thermore Prof. Marsh must bear in mind
that printers and mil'iners have to live, as
well as other people.
Superflous tools are a disadvantage; as,
for instance, when member Of an orches-
ira has a horn too many.
Augustus Popinjay, who has been let
ting Johnny ride pick-a-back for his sis
ter's sake; "Weil, Johnny, how do you
like that -
Johnny; Good 'nough-but faint
near so nice as ridn' Uncle Johns four
legged calf"
An exchange has an article on Bread
Making in Nineveh." 1t will prove of ah-
sorbing interest to those who have pre-.
pared themselves for such studies by eat
ing railway restaurant sandwiches.
a western paper says of girl who is
cataleptc frances: For six weeks she
has been in state of comma Alas
death must soon put Il period to her suf-
ferings.
SounI doctrine-that of socialistic
mass meeting.
y, "U'''' - w. S"9' il', .'0' IePoi''
-N"0'iN' W n,NG N0'" ""'''i '"''' "O
four iu"n could ho!G down.
The Latest novelty in gentlemcn's weal
- Il Sm'll lhsrihoneIer LOT breast pm
When man gets left he can thus easily
tell whether it is a cold day.
Til trnlv i che.n bntvor7 of4sn have
~, 81 ,, D'
10 pay "t"''y 10y u III 1"e emu
Some lecturers ret couple Of hundred
a night." SAYS an exchange. Yes. and
otha,s c,r,, IN tLs two centre rows
'' ''' va
"Dptav., ut tpnt neautifUI woman stand
linz. ga tl,.,...,.- 80 N..lm.d Mrs. Pom.
I.i, vino was ...,. d.,,, % f,,tri,,l,r ot
l.' " " '''I 49,. T"..a,,
one Oh 'he poi,"',I resort ." '"e 't'Ses
coast. she fairy has ha around LEI
head, like pictured saint
NONSENSE, my dear ~ exclaimed Mr.