Los Angeles daily herald., 1887-10-10
BILL NYE AND THE MAYOR.
He Points Out a Few of the An.
nOyances of nIr. Hewitt.

New York World.
Very few people fully realize the
petty annoyances connected with the
successful administration of municipal
affairs in New York, or the great vol
ume of correspondence which the
ignore. Mayor Hewitt has made a
powerful effort to answer personally
all letters received by him, from those
written to him by the President of the
United States down to the one that
complains of too much boiled cabbage
on the lower floor. New York is full
of people who seem to have been born
with stub pen in one hand and a
grievance III the other. For the sake
of convenience they have divided
themselves into two departments, one
operating on the press of the city and
the other on the mayor.
After he had tried for some time to
answer all these letters personally the
mayor decided that he could not dc
it, and so apportioned them to the
various departments, where many OF
them were buried in oblivion and
smoking tobacco in the various de-
partments. They were letters writ
ten by people who had discovered
mares nests and other bric-a-brac
that the mayor ought to know about.
When they did not get a prompt re
ply they Immediately wrote again,
threatening to pull out the props
which sust aimed the city and thus
allow it to fall with a dull thud.
Some have plans to suggest for the
advancement of our race. Others de-
sire chance to solve the great prob
lem of legislating one mans money
into another mans pocket without
pain. One man writes to Mayor Hew-
lit that America will certainly be
plunged into arnica so long as we have
felony OH every hand.
A woman writes to the Mayor to
ask him if he has seen anything OF
her truant husband. Said husband
was last seen listening to voice OF a
tahy-haired siren, and it is feared that
he has wandered off down the broad
road that leads to Yuba Dam, Cal.
She says that she and her husband had
grown gray together and they had
fought side by side against poverty,
and their eyes had grown dim with
years and they had got into the habit
of putting their teeth in the same
tumbler of water at night, and if the
Mayor would keep his eye peeled,
when he strolled around town, for a
heavy-set old darkey with a two-pound
charm tied on his watch chain, but
otherwise absolutely devoid of charms,
he would do her great favor and she
would be glad to help him in case he
ever got into trouble.
Perhaps it might interest the gen.
eral public to read few M these let
ters in order to more fully under
stand the drawbacks and annoyances
incident to mayoring in a large place.
1 can say that after reading these let
ters myself I have decided to abandon
all thoughts of struggling for the Of
fee. l am out of the race. The con-
test now narrows down to hand-to-
hand fight among the other males OF
New York.
Then follows letter from strug-
Cling musician, whose spelling l have
corrected wherever l could see that it
was wrong, unless it happened to be a
word about which was in doubt my
self, and in such case have allowed
it to remain as it was.
New YORK, Sept. the 22nd, 1887.
Mayor Huitt:
SIR am in great pain, and write
to you by means of another man who
has had better advantages than
have. l understand that you do not
feel above writing to poor man who
Graves your aid. am a musician,
sir, and have travelled a good deal. l
have given organ recitals in public for
twenty-five years with varying sue
cess.
Associated with me in business
capacity l have had collector, door
tender and cashier, all united in one
person as ii were. For the past six
weeks l have been deprived of him,
for under the ruling of our legal adviser
my associate, who has the misfortune
TO be monkey, and has been so for
so many years that he is now unable
to overcome it, has been taken to that
pound.
1 am now compelled to call to my
aid as an associate man who is Ell
dowed with more facilities, such as
they are, than my former agent and
collector, but he does not succeed SO
we'll or win the hearts of my audience
besides, l fear that he knocks down
a portion of the receipts. Can you
not restore to me, Mr.. Hewitt, my
true, tried and trusted associate? II
you 60 to the pound for him, you will
find him rather below the medium
heighth, wearing a red cotton cap,
and pair OF gored pantaloons with
an extra seating capacity. If you
bring him down town on the eleva-
tor you have to watch the little cuss
or he will bite your legs, SO no more
at present, from your friend,
p. Bono PUBLICo IL'TREMULo.
New YORK, September 20, 1887.
Hon. A. Hewitt, Mayor Of Neac York:
SIR-I suppose you are mayor OF
this whole town, and if 80 you are of the
hospitals rs well as Of the municipality
of New York. l am citizen of this
place that has always been square to-
ward every man and paid my bills as
they accrewed. / now ask you, in re-
turn for same, to intervene and pro-
tect me in my rights. The millishy
has never been called out to suppress
me. l have never been guilty of re-
bellyun or open defiance OF the law
and yet am unable to get a square
deal and write this brief note and
enclose a 2-cent stamp, to ascertain
whether, as mayor, you are for me ol
agin me.
Three years ago l entered your
town from u westerly direction.
did SO quietly and l presume that few
will remember the sircumstans, ye
such was SO, I had not been here
two weeks when l was run in, knocked
over and tromped onto by the bay
team of proud producer o.
beer. l was dashed to earth ant
nocked Galley west on Broadway st.
I.xx,l,;nD nortb hv cod bArcao opd I