The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1887-06-25
Good Manners,

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Books on etiquette are staple literary
wares. lust at present there seems to
be more than usual demand for them,
and some recently published treaties on
manners are having great run. This
is good thing, for it is a moral and CIV
ilizing process for people to give
thoughtful consideration to their dues
to their fellow-beings. If the study
does no more than to teach them not
to perform knife-swallowing tricks at
the table, it will be beneficial. There
is, however, a danger that in learning
rules of conduct without understanding
their underlying philosophy slavish
pedantry may be the result, or even
that worst form of snobbery which con-
sists in having 'lady' and gentleman
on the brain.
Courtesy is simply the due recogni-
tion of the fact that there are other peo-
pie in the world besides ourselves
A complementary truth, perception of
which is needful to the maintenance of
individuality, is that every one has a
right to do anything one pleases that
does not interfere with rights or COM
forts of others. The code of forms by
which courtesy is expressed varies from
age to age and among different peoples.
Its attainment is not difficult; the or
binary phrases of civility are the COM
mon currency of society and no one
can afford to be ignorant of them.-
Tlhse lthae exeafa often made tfos sn at
good at heart is a very weak extenua-
ton. of their ofense; for people do not
come in contact with one another's
hearts, but with their manners. In
fact, for most of the occasions of life,
it is more important for the general
welfare that peoples manners should be
good than their hearts. Hence it is
that the habitual propriety of conduct
which is designated by the phrase good
breeding is a better recommendation
to companionship than the posses
sion of some lofty virtues. Politeness is
duty that needs to be practiced like
other duties not until it becomes spon-
taneous and instructive does it acquire
its characteristic charm, which has the
power to conceal and atone for many
defeats. Emerson says: 'Mannersform
at last a rich varnish, with which the
routine of life is washed, and its details
adorned
While goodness of heart cannot COM
pensate in social intercourse for lack of
manners, it is equally true that really
good manners cannot subsist unless
they come from the heart. The humil-
ity of spirit which alone can quench the
arrogance of self is the fruit ofprofound
conviction of the fundamental equality
of mankind. Fortunate circumstances
or happy adjustments of capacity to the
conditions governing the world of busi-
ness or politics, enable some men to be-
come rich or famous while others are
poor and obscure. 1t occasionally
happens that the lucky ones have not
the sense to give God the glory, and
disgrace themselves by their pompous
airs and ridiculous self.conceit. The
rich privilege of being enabled to take
of the treasures of wisdom stored in our
higher educational institutions some
times results in turning out upon socie-
ty broods of foolish young ducks who,
splashing about in the puddle of their
own self-conceit, imagine themselves
sailing upon the ocean of life. Social
relations, being based upon the natural
right of every one to choose ones own
company, are full of exclusions. The
envy which these engender is as foolish
and wicked as the pride which they
nourish. Excluding from consideration
the things that are transitory and conven'
tional, the fact is obvious that the only
test of worth is the way one does one:
duty in the sphere allotted by Providence
Unless this truth regulates behavior,
the vital principle ofgood manners will
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