davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1887-02-08
TO the Women.

C&lC W OAnCAs
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one both sides, general lassitude, bearing down
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of the heart smothering in the breast, faInting
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wakefuness, loss Of power, memory and appetite
weakness of private nature barrenness, we
will guarantee to cure you with from to pack
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AE ~ Young, middleaged and old. single or
tSaGEI married. 1t is sure cure for dyspep-
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prostration resulting from indiscr of youth
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nervousness and bashtulness, caused by over-in-
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successfully in thousands of cases by both men
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to exercise, diet, battle, etc. One boz cures ca
tarrh.
PRICE Turner's Treatment, per package 81 !;
three packages 81. sekt prepaid receipt of
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the Treatment having been used in private prac-
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Louis, Mo-
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1887-02-08
MONEY

iness which will bring yom in more money right
awsy than ANYTHING else in this world Any one
can do the work aud live at home. Either sex;
sll ages. Something new, that inst coius money
for all workers. We will start you; capital not
needed. This Is one of the genuine, important
chances of lifetime. Those who are ambitious
and enterprising will not ilelsy Grsnd outft free
Address TRUE K CO., Augusta, Maine. n3O
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22
COAST DEFENSES.

Several boards, say this mornings dis.
patches, are considering the question ofour
harbor defenses. Let them not consider
too long. They ought to report early to
Congress No one expects war, and it is
the unexpected that happens, it is said
The truth is, the coast and harbor de-
fenses of the United States are so lament
ably inefficient and out of fashion, gear and
practicability for use, and are so few in
number and so thoroughly weakened that
the commonest dictates of prudence bid us
TO set things in better order at once. One
Is forced to conclude, after reading the
reports made to the Naval Bureau in the
port Oh the American nation, that a first
class French, English, German, Italian,
Chilean, Russian or japanese ironclad
cruiser could not sail into without any
resistance which she would consider worthy
of her guns. The dispatches say that
some elaborate reports on this subject may
go up to Congress through the Naval De-
partment this winter from the boards on
batteries, torpedoes. dynamite artillery,
ports will be ready. 1t is expected that
when made they will be accompanied by
recommendations by the Secretary of the
Navy proposing heavy expenditure to put
into all the chief ports the best system of
floating batteries. Congress ought to order
their construction. The day is not far
distant when the will be the chief reliance
of seaports against the advance of an enemy
from the sea; costly forts will give place to
low and very heavy earthworks; batteries
that can be shifted with comparative ease
will displace fixed defenses, and rams, tor
pedoes, swift ,armored gunboats and sub
marine boats will be employed to guard
The entrances to our ports. 1t is the be-
lief that S40,0O0,00O or S50,0O0,000 will
cover the cost of a proper system. Ii the
cost amounts to Sl00,O00,000, what of it =?
The surplus in the United States Treasury
will readily respond to such outlay, and
the expenditure will, besides doing what
is greatly needed, give much employment
to American labor and industries. With
proper harbors and land defenses, and a
rehabilitated navy, we will not only in
spire greater respect abroad, but will the
more respect ourselves.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22
The Ministerial Candidate

l was travelling up the Ohio river one
day last fall on the packet Fairy. The day
was very cold. A party of us were sitting
around the stove in the lower cabin whilst
the boat landed at some little way-side
landing-place to take on freight and pas
sengers
Presently a tall, gaunt old man. evidently
a new arrival, came up, with his carpet
bag in hand, which he deposited between
his knees as he sat down and spread ont
| his long knotty fingers before the door of
the stove to warm them
Casting his keen gray eyes around him
as he did so, he suddenly espied the thin,
cadaverous- looking young fellow, dressed
| all in black broadcloth, who was sitting
next to me in the circle around the stove.
Why, howdy, Lemmel ?" the old man
| said IN the heartiest way. ~ hardly
| knowed yer. How's the folks ~
"P-pr-pr-pretty w-w-well, M-M-Mr.
J-Johnson," replied the young man,
suffering miserably, as he submitted to
the hearty Misunderstanding which the old
man had reached across several of Us to
effect.
FINISHED yer schoolin' yet ?" inquired
he.
"Y-y-yes, s-s-s-sir," replied the young
man, with difficulty.
WAL, what bizzness air We in now ?"
| asked the old fellow, cycling the dress of
| his young friend rather curiously.
T11-Pm st-st-st-studying for the NM
ministry
"Phew-ee" exclaimed the old man, in
| a long whistle of intense surprise. "Waal,
now, Lemmel," he said after while.
| ''that's about the last line NV bizzness I'd "a
ever thought Nv attemptin' to tackle eff
I'd a-been in yore place. Whatever put it
into yore head ?"
LII had a v-ve-very st-st-strong call,
MINT Jo-Jo-Jo-J ohnson," explained the
young man, with slight flush on his pale,
| weak face.
"You might "a had dozen calls" re-
turned the old man, dryly; "but eff I'd
a-been you I'd be switched eff Pd a-eome."
An audible smile" ran around the cir
Gle at the old mans wit, which he, how
ever, never noticed. His young friend
made no response to his last suggestion,
whilst he continued in dry, anxious
tone:
at beats me- Lemmel, to know how you
low, even concedin' the call, to get through
with the rest of the bizness"
"Th-th-the L-L-Lord viii p-p-put the
w-w-words into m-my m-m-mouth," gasped
the poor young fellow, suffering worse
than ever under the keen gray eyes of the
old man.
"He'll have to do more an that sonny"
aid the old man, pityingly. After He
puts 'em thar, blamed eff He won't hev to
send somebody else along to pull EN- out"
The young ministerial candidate retired
to his state-room, and was seen no more
Harper's Magaztne.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22
TO-DAY's LEADING NEWS TOPICS

Testimony by Charles Croker and A. Cohen
before the Railroad Commission.
The Government proposes the purchase of
SI4, 0O0, 900 worth of bonds
0leomargarine law to be fully tested in the
Courts.
Kilbride, the evicted tenant of Lansdowne,
elected to the House of Commons.
Several shooting scrapes were reported yes
terday.
Redwood City adopted liquor license of SIS
per quarter.
Fourteen days delayed mails arrived at Tue
son from the East.
The Southern Pacific Company carrying IA
eilities are taxed to the utmost by freight and
pAsSengers.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22
ENVY OF THE SUCCESSFUL

When Mr.. Charles Croker, in his testi-
~mony before the Pacific Railroad Commits
sion the other day, declared that the war
by Selfsacrifcing philosophers against
rich railroad men is out of reason and is
cruel, for most of them have been at pow
-erty corners themselves, he struck home
with the weaponry of truth. In this land
the great mass of our rich men have risen
from poverty, or at least small means, by
dint of hard labor, provident habits and
clear head-work When the envious rail
at such men, they simply confess their own
Incapacity. What would they have? That
there shall be an end to human ambition,
that we shall have no more great works
and progress for lack of united capital en-
ergized by will-power and the incentive of
gain? The short-sighted fail to see that
but for capitalized energy and united purses
and persistent self-denying and irresistible
determination, we should have had no
great railway systems, distance and time
would not have been so reduced in COM
mercial exchanges, and the country would
be moving fifty years backward
upon the path of humanity As the
Commercial Bulletin of New York says, ac-
cording to our telegraphic dispatches, the
millionaires by no means always recline
on beds of roses. The trouble and anxiety
incident to their enterprises, even when
they are successful, are things the anti-
poverty party howlers never take into ac-
count and never experience AS Mr.,
Croker says, these railroad builders have
not infrequently been at the point when
in their distress they would gladly have
"quit with a clean shirt The bowler:
against the chiefs Of great enterprises are
the last men in the world to do anything
themselves to advance the age or engrave
upon its front the record of great achieve.
ments. Without wealth and the prospect
of attaining it, we would have to-day
neither railroads, steamship lines, tele.
phones or telegraphs, great mechanical
works or factories, great cities, great com.
merce, broad and prosperous country
galleries of art and halls of science, chairs
OF learning, great employers-in short,
without the freedom to strive for, and the
liberty to organize wealth lawfully, we
would be to-day looking backward into
time instead of forward into loftier posi-
bilities for civilization and country. In
this land to all men equal opportunities
are open. To those who fail all pity, to
those who succeed due praise.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22

A SIMPLE TEST OF KEROSENE OIL
Bulletin ~ c. State Board Of Health says
Take an ordinary pint tin cup. Fill it
within an inch of the top with water
warmed to the temperature of 1902 e.
Pour on this water three or four table
spoonfuls of the oil to be tasted Stir the
oil and water together, and wait short
time, say minute or two, for the oil to
collect on the top. Try the thermometer
again, and if the temperature is more than
one degree from 1902 F., add little cold
or hot water, as the case may be, so as to
bring the temperature within one degree
of 1902 f. Then stir again, and give time
as before for the oil to come to the top.
Now apply burning match or lighted
taper on level with the top of the cup,
say within half an inch OF the OIL If
within one second no flash occurs, the oil
is reasonably safe-otherwise, it is unsafe.
Purchase four or FIVE gallons of oil at a
time, and apply this test to each purchase.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22
BANISHING YERMIN.
The MediBval Method of Getting Rid of
Obnoxious Crop Destroyers

In 1749 appeared in the canton of Berne,
Switzerland, an enormous number of grubs;
and 1t was feared that the whole crop
would be destroyed therefore the Coun-
Gil of the Commonwealth sent deputation
to the Archbishop Of Lausanne, with
the petition to Danish the OBJ
noxious creatures from the canton.
OF course it is not stated that
the neighboring cantons had agreed to re-
ceive the grubs, but the Archbishop seems
not to have considered the incongruity of
said petition. He gave an affirmative an
impose the Punishment of the grubs pro-
yiding for strict observance of the customs
and laws. After a prayer an advocate for
the people was chosen. He notified the
Court of his appointment, and proposed
the citation of the grubs. On certain
day some of the grubs were brought before
the Court, and their advocate chosen. The
priest, followed by large crowd of pious
people in solemn procession, went to the
cemetery, to the fields, to the vineyards
and to the banks of the river to serve sum
mons on the defendant. He delivered the
following-at that time probably courte-
ous-addresS, as warning and as citation
to the telons:
aye hideous and degraded creatures 4;
We grubs There was nothing like We in
| the ark of Noah By orders of my august
superior, the Archbishop of Lausanne
! ami in obedience to the Holy Church,
command we all and every one to disap-
/ pear during the next six days from every
place where food grows for man or beast
If not obedient, / enjoin We to appear on
! the sixth day, at / o'clock, afternoon. at
Willisburg, before the Archbishop of Lau-
same"
As some righteous people objected be-
cause the citation was not exactly made in
the manner provided by law, the case was
postponed, and after a lawful citation an
| other day was named Then the process
began. The advocate chosen for the de-
PENDANT was Jean Perrodet, well-known
dogmatical and obstinate disputant Per-
haps it will appear somewhat doubtful if
| the nomination of this advocate fulfilled
exactly the demands of the law and the
custom of the time, as it is stated that Mr..
Perrodet died a short time before his nom
| ination. Nevertheless, the case and the
| complaint were read, and, as no defender
appeared, the judgment was given for the
plaintiff
ave, Benedictus, of Wonderland, Arch
bishop of Lausanne, condemn and excom-
municate ye obnoxious worms and grubs,
that nothing shall be left of We, except
such parts as can be useful to man"-The
! Siriss Cross.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22
TELEGRAPHIC BREvITIEs.

The California G. A. r. excursionists
passed the Needles last night for st. Louis
with flying colors.
Tools for jail-breaking have been found
IN the cell vacated BY q convicted horse
thief in Santa Rosa
Sheriff Shopp, of Fort Worth, Texas
has arrested John Shade on suspicion Of
being one of the train robbers.
During yesterdays festival at Rome, foul
bombs were thrown in front of the Vatican
and one entered the Papal barracks.
Policeman William Birch, of San Fran.
cisco, fell under a Larkin-street car yes.
day and received injuries that may prove
fatal
E. r. Rutherford, the railroad employe
who was run over on Monday by loco
motive in San Francisco, died from his in.
juries.
There are rumors of the Nevada county
Grand Jury having discovered crookedness
in some of the county offices, and sensa,
ton is promised.
Grape crushing will commence among
the Sonoma wine-makers next Monday
The crop is lighter than that of last year
but the quality is superior.
A collision occurred on the Southern
Kansas Railroad in Indian Territory, yes.
terday. One was construction train, and
number of workmen are reported killed
Superintendent Homer Overmeyer, O
the Linn-street agricultural implement
shops, Toledo, has absconded with thou.
sands of dollars. He also deserted his wife
and child.
The freight lines East and West of Chi
cago yesterday came to an unexpected
agreement upon uniform freight classifica
ton. In future there will be eight classes
instead of ten.
Quinten Campbell, city editor of thu
Leavenworth Sun shot his wife yesterday
The cause alleged is unfaithfulness. Camp
bell was at one time Captain in the Fifth
United States Infantry.
Colonel Clowry. General Superintendent
of the Western Union Telegraph Company
is now in San Francisco. He is inaugu
rating great Improvements in the facilitie!
of the line, and says that portions from
Colfax to Reno will be made the finest il
| the world. The California business, h,
| says, has grown enormously.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22

enough in the county exhibits at the Pa
vilion to employ the energies ard skill of
the reporters every day. There is sug-
gestion and food for thought in those ex-
hibits and the stock exhibition that may
well engage the attention of the San Fran
cisco journals for weeks. In the Art De-
partment notes were taken and written up
for some of our San Francisco contempo-
raries by their reporters, and forwarded,
but they were ruthlessly excluded. The
truth probably is that at least a portion of
the San Francisco papers dread the antag-
onisln of the Mechanics Institute concern.
The State Fair is State institution. 1t
is representative in the several depart
ments of chief industries and production.
All the people are interested in it. 1t has
no more local significance than would at
tach to it if located anywhere else, and
every paper in the State having the ca
pacity ought 10 consider the fair an object
of attention and OF criticism There are
one or two exceptions to the Indifferent
manner in which the fair is reported by
most of the San Francisco press, but as a
rule it has not half the attention in that
quarter that is bestowed upon baseball
match
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22

THE Chicago Anarchists are plating the
rope for their necks. They have flooded
the city with infammatory circulars, printed
in New York, calling upon the discon-
tented, the vicious, and the Anarchist and
Socialist classes, and denouncing the Judges
of the Supreme Court of Illinois and the
officers of the Police Department of Chi
cago in vulgar and libelous terms. We
should not be surprised to hear of more
mountaineering in Chicago. These desper-
ate men, raging insanely over the condem-
nation Of Spies, Parsons, and their fellow
murderers, may resort to further assassina-
ton. They are capable of such protest
against the executions about to take place.
The people of Chicago ought to be equal
to the task of suppressing these dangerous
agitators. They may not have cause to
fear them greatly now but, unfortunately,
the desperate, reckless and criminal classes
in great cities are so large, that there is
danger of their being mainly enrolled by
the Anarchists. In that case they could
make Chicago suffer severely. The latest
trick Of these rascals is to sign one of their
infamous circular "The Federation of
Trade Unions" This is a part of the
scheme to draw workingmen into the An
archist ranks. To some extent it may sue
coed, and some deluded men led to their
ruin for utilization with Anarchists means
precisely that.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22

Mr.. IGNATUs DoNNELLY has been the
means of reyivifying the Baconian Shakes
peare question and in a new volume has
given lengthy, if no weighty reasons for
his belief that Francis Bacon wrote the
plays We attribute to William Shakes
peare. The chief ground upon which he
advances his claim is that of a supposed
cipher running through the plays and
sonnets and which he declares was device
by the cryptlogramist to fasten his identity
upon the work. Mr.. DonnelIy's theory is
new only in this particular 1t ought to
be sufficient that Jonson's affirmative testi-
mony upsets all the theories which must
rest upon negatives, that are advanced to
deprive Shakespeare of his honors. The
latest development in the revived debate is
the issue of the Bankside edition of
Shakespeare. 1t was projected several
years ago by Appleton Morgan and is now
announced as about to appear. 1t is be-
ileved that in all impartial minds this
issue will settle the question about Mr.
Donnelly's cipher discovery "The Bank
side prints the earliest Shakespeare text
In parallel columns with the 1923 text
thus showing at glance the limitations.
augmentations and curtailments which
these plays underwent during their first
stage of life at the hands of literary pi-
ates, stage censors, careless printers and in
the mouths of the actors, thus rendering
1t at once apparent that from neither text
could a cipher be worked out to-day by
any exact mathematical process, even had
one been originally concealed there.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22

IT would not be bad plan for the State
Board of Agriculture to consider the ques-
ton of county exhibits for the fair of 1888,
at this time. They might deem it wise
to take counsel with those in charge of the
exhibits at the present State Fair, and
thus be better enabled to formulate an eff
fective plan for inducing many more of the
counties to exhibit in 1888. BY means of
these grouped exhibits the annual fairs of
the State can be made vastly more useful
and of greatly wider influence.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22
A NEW ENGLAND MYSTERY.
Discovery of the Body of a Girl Who
Disappeared Mysteriously.

Il
WoRCEsTER, September 21st.-[Special. I
Miss Lille Hoyle disappeared from her
home in Webster, Mass, on the night OF
found until yesterday afternoon, when her
partially decomposed body was found in
an abandoned corn-cnb in the adjoining
town of Oxford. Her hands and feet were
tied with packing Irvine.
Lille Heyle was an attractive young wo-
man OF % years. She had worked in an
lce-cream store in Webster On the night
OF her disappearance she left the store at
$3.50 p. N. and went to her room which she
occupied with her sister in an upper story
OF the block where she worked She put
on faded satin wrapper. and saving She
must go down stairs, left the room without
hat or outer garment, and never returned
1t is supposed she was seized by VILLAINS,
hurried away, maltreated and murdered,
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22

The hot weather of last week left its i'm
preston upon the little boy, who wrote to
his mother as follows: 'Dear Ma: It's hot
as fire here. My ten-cent piece melted
yesterday, so that's hot, amt it? Please
send me dollar so it won't melt Been
in swimming nineteen times to-day. We
get bully ice cream here for one cent a
glass. Don't forget the dollar"
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22

The RECORD UNION is the only paper on
the coast, outside Of San Francisco, that re-
ceives the full associated Press dispatches from
oil parts Of the worid. Outside of San Fran
cisco IL has no competitor, in point of num-
bcrs, in its home and general circulation
throughout the coast.
Evening Edition for Northern Cali
fornia and Oregon, issued at p. NJ,
carrying far later news than any
other paper on the coast.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22

1T is not little singular that while the
San Francisco journals put special and
competent reporters into the field in Sac
ramento during the State Fair, their re-
ports are mainly confined to racing notes.
That is to say, some of the leading San
Francisco press take notice of little relat-
ing to the State Fair except the speed pro-
gramme. Now, the truth is there is
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22

A female servant sweeping out bache-
lor's room, found four-penny piece on the
carpet, which she carried to the owner.
" You may keep it for your honesty" said
he. A short time afterwards he missed
his gold pencil case, and inquired of the
girl if she had seen it. "Yes, sir" was
the reply. "And what did you do with
it p Kept it for my honesty. "-Pdris
Figaro.
Sacramento daily record-union. [volume] (Sacramento [Calif.]) 1875-1891, 1887-09-22

"Will you please insert this obituary
notice ?" asked an old gentleman of an
editor az make bold to ask it because the
deceased had a great many friends here
who'd be glad to hear of his death. Phil
ddelphid Call.