The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1887-08-10
PITH AND POINT.

get lemonade. e.-ArkansaW TrGreLer.
Where's the improperly in calling a.
Boston boy a regular Hub-bub9-Societs {
Journal. -
The crow is the most rational of bipeds, I
It never makes a noise without caws.-4;
LoareU Citizen.
It is pity that our neighbors do not Z
know as well as we do what is best fol
them. Boston Courier. -. hi
1t is bad luck to sit down to a small
dinner with thirteen, as the chances ara
that you will not get enough to eat.-
Judge. q
"Ill be in when I'm out" was,the some
what paradoxical utterance Of the slcB
man, as his friends closed visit to hh
bedside.-Boston Transcript. ~ 5s5
1t was Boston boy who started the
fashion of calling his father by his given
name, and the fashion lasted about thirty !:
onds.-Detriot Free Press. .,1,.s -, ~.
The baseball player is the only en-.
p!oye whose right to strike is acknow1s5
edged and even approved by those ne
works for.-Merchant 1raueler. ~
There is a gentleman living on. Staten {
Island so infatuated with the view that he
gets from his house that he walks up the :
hill every day. backward.-The Epoch
Turn, pilgrim, turn; thy cares forego
And drink thy I'LL Of mirth;
Man wants but little here below. =;
He only wants the earth.
.. -Washingtoa Ratche& :
After running lawn-mower for an
hour, this morning, he remarked that y
ever he had said anything derogatory OF
unkind of the snow-shovel, he: would,
most willingly take it back:-spring1ssld
Republican. ~. SO.
"Ma," said Bertie, stshould I say
pants or 'trousersP" "Trousers, my
dear" said the mother. "Well, then, IS
said BERTHE, 81 think Bridget had better
give Fido some water; he trousers awful
ly."-Tid-Bits. .--..'f.. :ss
After the clouds, the blue, =:
After the drought, the dew; ,.
And after you've taken your summer yaca
tion t{zss
The bills will shower on you;
There has been drop of $500 in the;
price of elephants for managerie pur..
poses, and it is expected that prices will
90 still lower. Don't lay in your fall snds
winter elephant stock until you know
that rock-bottom has been reached. .-sl
Chicago Herald. .'" go ,.., + 80 q
Wife-"John, why didn't you wakemss
up last night during the fire on the next
biock?n Husband-"It didn't amount;
to much" Wife-"Well, the next time:s;
wish yon would let me know it; you'
know can't sleep if there is fire any
where near. ."-1Id-Bns. s'@-%
The iceman smiles as he counts the gains e
Derived from the trade Of summer, -
And as he walks the streets diSdains -
The greeting of the plumber.
But the plumber will pass the iceman by
And be himself the hero, -
When the storm cloud floats in the winter sky,
And the mercury's down to zero. -
Boston Courier. Z
"Let's 90 now, Amy" said Mildred to-
the high school girl when the game was
only half over. "No," replied Amy; ~
want to 90 the whole hog" "Amy.s
dear" protested Mildred, "that is repre-
hensible slang. You should say, traverse
the unabbreviated swine "-Pittsbur9-
Chronicle. -
First Blase Youth (much demoralized)s
-"By Gwage, Cholly Pm completely
exhausted; just assisted in saving-aw-S,
young woman's life." Second Blsse
Youth-"Brave fellah! But l. didn't
know you could swim, Freddy" First
Blase Youth-'1 cawn't. Another fel.
lah did that part. I stood on shore anda
scweamed for help."-Harper's Weekly!
There is a good deal of food for con-
temptation in the remark attributed to q.
Pacific Coast Chinaman. He was taken
to see one of the booming new towns,
where all the outlying country was laid
out in city lots, and he took it all In
When he returned home he was asked,
what he thought of it, and he answered. 8;
.Too muchee by and by."-Raryords
Cou1aht.
o merchant in thine hour Of e g e, s.
If on this paper you should &C, "
And look for something to apppp, |
Your yearning for greenback WV,
Take our advice and beyyy, -
Go straightway out and advert / l. *
You'll find the project of some U u, ~
Neglect can offer no qqqq,,
Be wise at once, prolong your aa
silent business soon d Xxx. saT