The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1887-05-21
LIMEKILN CLUB.
A Dastardly Deed Which Led Broper
Gardner to Deliver a Sound Lectur

destroy IafaNlSe f1all was reVedleu "
five clock Saturday evening when ne
janitor arrived to place the hall IN
order for the usual meeting Ever sice
the attempt of last October bear-trPS
and spring-guns have been set at evry
door and window when the hall vas
closed, and this fact was genersly
known to the public. The human
hyena who had resolved in his own hse
mind to destroy the headquarters ofhe
club procured ladder, mounted me
roof, and then cut hole and descenied
alongside of a chimney. In this way
he thought to escape all dangers pc
pared for him, and he no debit
chuckled with fiendish glee as he
dropped down into the library. His
first move was to demolish the bust OF
Cicero. This was one of the first butts
donated to the Climb, and has representa-
Horace Greeley, Napoleon Bonapare,
Franklin Pierce, George Washington
and several other distinguished men'y
turns. The villain seized crowar
standing in a corner of ne
library and demolished the bust at ne
awful sweep. He then started or
the club safe, doubtless intendineto
drive the crowbar through and throgh
it, and then vengeance overlook jim.
AS he stepped into the passage 6ehiad
the secretary's desk a bear-trp awaited
his coming with yawning jaws and
clashing teeth. What occrred is par
TALLY a matter of guesswof, The trap
was found sprung and ipits jaws was
bloody boot. Bloody lacks led from
thence to the ante-room and there the
bastard had raised wiuiow and leaped
down on the roof of thegrocery and es-
capped to the ground. The occurrence
probably took place Friday night, as the
policeman on the bclt remembers of
hearing LOUD, long siriek about eleven
o'clock. 1t sounded to him like the
voice of a s;rong man about to give up
the fight TO. his life and though he in
vestigated the neighborhood he was
made no wiser. Hw the villain suf-
fered-how he wrng his hands and
vowed to live a better life hereafter
how the sweat of agony stood on his
forehead and his eyes grew fercely
wild-can be imagined by any one WHO
has visited the scene
1t is supposed that he had a "pap'
in the alley, and that this man finally
came to his relief and pried the trap
open far enough to permit the foot to
be pulled out of the boot. As soon as
the meeting was called to order the
ianitor reported the case, accompanied
by war map, and Brother Gardner
arose and said:
my frens, dis incident furnishes me
wild an opportunity to address you on
de subiicl of Goodness VS.. Badness, If,
when baby was three days ole, he
could reason an calkilate, he would
reason as follows: 'Heah | ar, sound,
healthy boy, wild a big show Of CROWN
up to manhood. De more | kick an
yell an misbehave doorin' my infancy
de mo- spankin's I'll receive. De better
mind an de gooder l ar as a boy dc
easier will l slip along. As young
man | shall be upright an honest. As
a middle-aged man 1 shall act on dc
squar'. As an ole man l shall quit
chawin' plug tobacker, read up on dc
Bible an 60 to bed airly.'
"Wickedness doan' pay, fgger it W
as you will. We hev had many in
stances of it in dis club, an we ar sur
rounded wild 'em at home. Wher
Whalebone Howker stole wheelbarrel
belongin' to Pickles Smith he at fust re-
joiced an was glad. He felt dat h,
was two dollars ahead of de game, anC
he poked hisself in de ribs fur q smar
man. Howsumeber, he hadn't had da
stolen vchicllle in his posseshun two
hours when his game rooster died, d.
dog-catcher picked up his dog, an ;
man who owed him four dollars wen
into bankruptcy. He could figger da
he was eight dollars out of pocket, an
den Pickles f0un' out who stole hi
wheelbarrer an cum ODER an licket
Whalebone widin an inch of his life
besides.
"Take de case of Bermuda Jones
who Ibis mex doah to Condensed Gun
ningham. Bermuda sot down wild
piece of chalk an figgered up dat wick
edness paid two hundred per cent, an
he went ODER to de grocery; backed VI
agin cracker bar'l. an while he in
GAGGED de grocer in 4 religus discussion
wild one hand. he filled his hind poke
wild crackers wild de odder H
started out of dat grocery feeling da
he was seben cents ahead an still gain
in, but what was de resultp A small
boy, who was in dar to buy cent
Wort of tatfy, seed de hull Performance
an told de grocer. Bermuda was fol
Tered home, knocked down in tn
kitchen an made to give up de fo' cane
seat cheers in his parlor to settle d
case. Did he profit by his badness
Did he make any two hundred per CEN
on datp
"Agin, take de case of Kurnel Letting
well Kabar. had six Leghorn hens i
my coop, an he coveted 'em. mstea
of comm to me in Il frank, honest wa
an offerin' to buy dose hens at de-
value an gibin' me his note due