davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01
HkTHAT
Ais
YOU2

DO you feel dan. languid, low-sprited, HE
less and fndescribably miserable, both physS-~
cally and mentally; experience q sense or
fullness or bloating after eating. or OF gone
ing, tongue coated. bitter or bad taste In
mouth, irregular appetite, dizziness, frequent
headaches, blurred eyesight, floating speclKs ("
before the eyes. nervous prostration or ex-
haustion. frritability of temper, hot hushes,
alternating with chilly sensations. sharp,
feet, droWsinesS after meals, wakefulness, or
disturbed and unrefreshing sleep. constant,
indeecribable feeling or dread. or OF impend-
ing calamity9
of these symptoms you are suffering from
that most common OF American maladiesE
bilious Dyspepsia, or Torpid Liver, associated
with Dyspepsia, or Indigestion. The moro
complicated your disease has become, the
greater the number and diversity or symp-
toms No matter what stage it has reached,
DIR. Pierce,S Golden Medical Discovery
will subdue IL, If taken according to direG-
fions for q reasonable length OF time. II not
cured, complications multiply and Consump-
Rheumatism, Kidney Disease. or other grave
maladies are quite liable to set in and, sooner
or later, induce fatal termination.
DIR. Pierce,S Golden Medical D1gS
cOVery acts powerfully upon the Liver, and
through that great blood purifying organ,
purfties, from whatever cause arising. 4t Is
equally ehicacious in acting upon the Kid
neyS, and other excretory organs, cleansing,
strengthening. and healing their diseases. AS
digestion and nutrition, thereby building up
both flesh and strength. In malarfal districts,
this wonderful medicine has gained great
celebrity in curing Fever and Ague, Chtlls and
Fever, Dumb Ague, and kIndred diseases;
DIR. Pieree's Golden Medical Dis
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01
Ought Not to Keep Them.

"Do you keep bananasP" inquired
Jones of the groceryman.
eyes, SIR"
What do you want to keep EN- for?
Why don't you sell emp And he
rushed out just in time to miss the rot
ten apple the groceryman fired at him.
N y. Sum-
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01
nRadIv Out of Order,

Or only slightly so, constipated and irregu-
lar bowels resume their functions when in
vigorated with Hostetter's Stomach Bitters,
being genial laxative, which produces an
action closely akin to that of nature. Sub
stitute, if you have hitherto used drenching
drugs, this far more salutary and safe pro
moter of regularity. Bear in mind, too, that
it subdues malaria, liver complaint, rheuma-
tism, and bladder and kidney ailments.
Don't use it by fits and starts, but with reg
ularity, if the case is chronic.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01
Don't Want Relief, But Cure"

al Don't Want Relief, But Cure"
is the exclamation of thousands suffering
from catarrh. To all such we say: Catarrh
can be cured by DR.. Sage's Catarrh Rene
DIV. 1t has been done in thousands of cases
why not in yoursl Your danger is in de-
lay. Enclose stamp to Worlds Dispen-
sary Medical Association, Buffalo, N. Y, for
pamphlet on this disease.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01
Rusiness Education.

manship course, Shorthand and Type
Writing all taught by efficient teachers.
Catalogue and full particulars sent free.
Address, D. L. MUssELMAN, A. M, Prin
Gem City Business College, Quincy, Ill.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

ARE you sad, Respondent, gloomy7
Are you sore distressed?
Listen to the welcome bidding
" Be at rest.'
Have you aches and pains unnumbered,
Poisoning lifes Golden Cup2
Think not there's no balm in Gilead and
"Give it up"
A Golden Remedy awaits you
Golden not alone in name
Reach, OH suffering one. and grasp 1t.
Health reclaim.
There is but one " Golden'' Remedy-Dr.
Pierce's Golden Medical Discovery. 1t
stands alone as the great "blood- purifier -
acknowledgements and "health-restorer, p
of the agel The Liver, it regulates, remov-
ing all impurities. The Lungs it strength
ems. cleansing and nourishing them. The
whole system it builds up, supplying that
above all other things most needed-pure,
rich Blood.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

PRICKLY ASH BITTERs warm up and in
vigorate the stomach, improves and strength
ems the digestive organs, opens the pores,
promotes perspiration, and equalizes the Cir
culation. AS corrector of disordered sys-
tenn there is nothing to equal it.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

II afflicted with Sore Eyes use DR.. Isaac
Thompson's Eye Water Druggists sell it. 25c.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

-Fogg says he quite lost his breath
the other day upon hearing young
lady in the horse car remark that 1.-The
limb of mutton sleeve is again coming
into fashion. ''-Bostozl TRANSCRIPT.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

R W. TANs1IL & Co., Chicago:
Your "Tansirs Punch sc cigars are a.
staple as sugar and they NeUer fail to give
Champaign, Ill
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

THE girl who calls out @What do yer soy?"
has taken possession of the entire west end
of Coney Island
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

! IT Is a bold man, indeed, that will not
| dodge boulder.-Nelo Raven Nens.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

"How is busihess?" asked one convict OF
another 1--WE are driven to death, replied
the other, who was en- route for the gal1ows.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

In answer to causaI question,
How easy and truthful to tell it's
4 cure for the worst indigestion,
To tax Pierce's PurgatiVe Pellets.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

BAD spell of weather-the lamb-like
compositor's effort in dropping the lekter
"a" from the first syllable.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01
CUHES ALL HUM0RS,

from q common Blotch. or Eruption, to the
worst Scrofula- Salt-rheum, Fever-sores,' -
ScaIy or Rough Skin, in short, all diseases
caused by bad blood are conquered by this
cine. Great Eating Ulcers rapidly heal under
its benign influence. Especially has it mani
Erysipelas Boils, Carbuncies, Sore Eyes. Scrof-
ulous Sores and Swellings. Hip-1oint Disease
4" White Swellings," Goftre, or Thick Neck,
and Enlarged Glands. Send ten cents in
stamps for a large Treatise, with colored
plates, on Skin Diseases, or the same amount
for Treatise on Scrofulous Affections.
"FOR THE BLOOD IS THE LIFE"
Thoroughly cleanse it by using DIR. Pieree'1
Golden Medical Discovery and good
digestion, fair skin, buoyant spirits, vital
strength and bodily health will be established.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

whatever purpose pump may serve in q
dairy. it does not account for the milk in the
cocOanut-Te1ds Siffinls.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

FABRICS and Cuticles are rendered mar
velously white by Glenn's Sulphur Soap.
HIPS Hair Dye, Black or Brown, 500
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

In boat regattas the starting line is ap-
proprtately called the scratch. - YOnk<r:
GGzstte.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

THE average boarding house Is having q
dy tins Of it just now.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

PIso's Remedy for Catarrh is agreeable to
use. 1t is not liquid or a snuff. SOC.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

ARTICLES of separation-knives, scissors,
etc.-Aerchd,tt Traveller
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

RIoHT, on their taps-the shoemaker and
the drummer.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

WHY is chicken pie like a gunsmith':
shopg Because it contains fowl-in pieces
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01

The DAISY White Bronze Braided
Wire Bustle beats all. Light and
durable. Modelled after the latest
Partisan styles. Yields to the
slightest pressure, yet Immediately
returns to its proper shape. Sold
by all dealers, at 90 Cents.
Three-Row "Pearl," at 60 Cts.
If you do not find them at stores,
we will send sample, postpaid, on
receipt of price. Catalogues and
Price Lists on application. Weston
& Wells Manfg Co., 1917 Chestnut
Street, Philada. Agents Wanted.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1887-09-01
CONSUMPTION.


which is ScrOfuIa OF the Lungs, Is arrested
and cured by this remedy, if taken in tho
earlier stages of the disease. From its mar
velous power over this terribly fatal disease,
when first Offering this now world-famed rem
edy to the public, DIR. Pierce thought seriously
of calling it his " CONsUMPTIoN CURE" but
abandoned that name as too restrictive for
q medicine which, from its wonderful conn
bination of tonic, or strengthening, Alternative,
or blood-cleansing, ant-bilious, pectoral, and
nutritive properties, is unequaled. not only
as q remedy for Consumption. but for All
Chronic Diseases OF the
Liver, Blood, and Lungs.
For Weak Lungs. Splitting of Blood. Short
ness of Breath, Chronic Nasal Catarrh, Bron-
chitis, Asthma, Severe Coughs and kindred
affections, it Is efficient remedy.
Sold by Druggists, at $1OO. or Six Bottles
for $500.
~ Send ten cents in stamps for DR.. Piercef
book on Consumption. Address,
WsiId's Dlspsnsary Medical Association,
663 Main ST, BUFFALO, N. ",
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1887-07-23

On the Attn of July. at ten o'clock in
the evening. the radiant evening star
Venus. AS she moves eastward from
the sun, approaches very near the first
magnitude star. Regulus. Planet and
star are nc their nearest point, and are
then said TO be In conjunction.
This IN .ans that they are In the
same right ascension, or longitude,
but not that they are in the same de-
clination, or latitude. IL they were in
the same longitude and latitude, the
planet would pass directly over the
star, hiding IL from view. and an oc-
cultation would occur.
The moon often occults planets and
stars, but IL is rare phenomenon when
planet occults another planet or
star. Venus and Regulus will be near
each other at the time of conjunction,
there being only degree, Ii minutes
of blue sky intervening between them,
the planet being south OF the star.
The celestial picture will be inter
esting 10 witness. and the western sky
will be the scene of the spectacle.
The two stars set few minutes be-
fore ten o'clock on the evening of the
4th. so that In the Eastern States they
will not be visible at the moment of
conjunction.
There Is no need of pointing out
Venus, the fair evening star cannot
be mistaken for any other; and Regu-
lus will come into view on the north
east OF the planet as soon as the twi-
light glow fades into the evening
shades Regulus is the leading bril-
liant In Leo. and the we'l.known star
In the handle OF the Sickle. IL Is so
near the ecliptic OF suns path that the
moon and planets are often In It's
vicinity.
Venus, after conjunction, will be
found east OF Regulus. She keeps on
her eastern course until the 18th, when
change comes. She has reached the
limit OF her distance from the sun and
begins 10 retrsce her steps toward him,
at the same time approaching the
earth, growing larger and brighter
and setting earlier every night.
ON the 18th Of August she reaches
her greatest brilliancy, when she may
be seen nc MONDAY. On September
2lst, she passes between us and th,
sun, and finishes her course as evening
stac.
The summer sky will be lovely with
her serene presence, as, charming
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1887-07-23
AnUnexp.cted suggestion.

"say. Gaddersby," said Mr.. smith,
rs he came into the fish store with lot
OF tackle in his hand, II want you to
give me some fish 10 take home with
me. Kind o. Tx 'em up so that they'll
look Us IL they've been caught to-day,
will yous"
Certainly. sir" said the grocer.
"How many
"Oh, you'd better give me three or
four bass. Make IL look decent in
quantity without appearing to exag-
gerate, you know"
Yes, sir, but you'd better take white
fish. hadn't you!"
"Why, what makes YOU think so?"
"Oh, nothing, except that your wife
was down here early this afternoon
and said IL you dropped in with fish
pole over your shoulder and general
ly woe-begone look, TO have you take
white fish II possible, as she liked that
kind better than any other"
Mr.. smith took white fsh. Her
chant Trace
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1887-07-23

The laws regarding game are very
strict in England. and even In the
shooting season no one who does not
'spreserve" game, as the rearing and
care OF IL is here called, Is allowed to
kill rabbit, partridge, or a pleas
ant, even on his own property. All
such game Is considered to belong to
those persons In the neighborhood who
have "preseryes. III a rabbit should
come into the garden OF the house
where we are staying and be found eat
ing the cabblges II may be driven
away. but IL the owner OF the garden
should catch or kill it he would be
subject to penalty.
IL must not be supposed that the
great proprietors are always stingy
about their game. On one OF the es-
tates of the Prince Of Wales each poor
man Is allowed TO come 10 the house
every day In the shooting season and
get one rabbit. He Is perfectly well
come TO the animal, now IL Is dead, for
the prince and his friends could not
possibly eat all they shoot; but IL he
should presume to deprive the owner
Of the pleasure of killing IL he would
be poacher and be put in prison.
SO. Nicholas.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1887-07-23

There comes time. very early in
the lives OF most schoolgirls, when
they long for jewelry, ribbons. laces,
and all other articles which accompany
ornamental womanhood. The desire
Is an inseparable accompaniment Of a
changing age, as the Young boy would
fain lengthen his knickerbockers into
trousers, In the hope that he will thus
more nearly resemble father or uncle.
But IL girls could persuade them
selves that prodigality OF ornament
is unsuited 10 their years, il they
could be content to wait for more
mature age before blossoming into
finery, what temptation TO foolish
yielding might be spared fond moth
ers!
">he really longs for set of tur--
quois." III don't quite approve OF It.,
for like 10 see girls sirhply dressed,
but she ,couid enjoy them so much"
And so they are bought, and Rosa
linda ilaunts them in all sorts OF un-
suitable places, because she knows
they are pretty, and thinks them be-
coming to her. So they are, but they
transform her from the rosebud age to
that of the rose, and no forced flower
is ever as lovely as the one TO which
nature only is godmother.
"What strikes me most forcibly
about my pupils" said lady who,
from teaching public school girls in a
manufacturing district, had become
established in private school patron
lied by what are actually, and not
technically. "our best families, sis the
plainness of their dress. Their clothes
are of fine and beautiful material, but
very plainly made.
Their hair is simply dressed, their
collars immaculate, and their boots in
trim order. They are far less preten-
tious than the girls have been &C
customed TO seeing, but they look like
such ladies'"
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1887-07-23

A curious custom at Welsh funerals
is termed the parsons penny" After
reading the burial service in the
Church, the clergyman stands behind o
table while the psalm is being sung.
In the meantime each OF the mourners
place some money on the table for his
acceptance. This ceremony Is regard
ed as a token of respect TO the deceased,
although IL was originally intended to
compensate the clergyman for praying
for the soul OF the deceased. In some
Welsh parishes, also, a similar custom
called spade money" is kept up. AT
ter the corpse has been committed to
its resting place, the grave digger pre-
sents his spade as receptacle for do
nations, these offerings, which often
amount 10 goodly sum, being regard
ed rs his perquisite.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1887-07-23
SUNDAY rrohibl, on I'm Texas.

"where can | buy pair OF cuffs"
inquired "A late riser of an Austin hotel
proprietor one sunday morning.
Don't believe YOU can buy them
anywhere" replied the hotel man.
clothing stores are all closed up until
4 o'clock in the evening"
"Well. where can get a cock-tailg
/ am ms dry as puff ball"
Cant. saloons are all closed until
after o'clock"
IL suppose can get glass OF
sweet cider at some corner grocery,
can't IL"
"Not much; groceries are all closed
up until after o'clock"
"Are, chr Then guess I'll have TO
90 down 10 some drugstore and get a
glass Of plain soda
Cant do that, either. Drug-stores
are not allowed 10 sell soda until after
4 o'clock"
The man moved mournfully over TO
the water-cooler and had about half
filed tumbler when policeman in
front Of the hotel commenced shoot
ing at suspicious looking dog. The
hotel guest dropped the glass, jumped
about fourteen feet, and running be-
hind the Office desk shouted:
"Don't shoot again, cap! | won't
touch drop Of your darned old ice.
water until after 4 o'clock Ii you
think II is too rich for my blood. III
practice self-denIal and spit cotton till
shutdown. z-Teras SUffngs.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1887-07-23

"Oh, The drums were heard and the
piccolo note, as the circus uptown
paraded, and the shorn-off mule and
the whiskered goat and the elephant
lumber shaded. l followed il calmly
at early morn. my work and my labors
spurning, and | harked TO the sound
of rusty horn with wild and I'M
hallowed yearning. Few and short
were the tunes they played. and they
paused not at all 10 monkey, so |
slowly followed the route they made
at the heels of the log-eared donkey"
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1887-07-23

when dat disease called de swell
head keeps a grip on young man
arter he has passed his twenty -fo'th
birthday, he am purity sartin TO
eventoolly bring up in de lunatic asy-
lum or de poo housa.
III say to you, Brudder Buckhorn,
drap IL! BE who YOU ar an what you
ar. II you git up 10 IS a week let the
world know IT, II you drop back To
g. don't lie about it. An about your
disease. IL don't kerry peason of
like gallopin' consumpshun or typhoid
fever, but it holds him mp TO de ridi-
cule and contempt of all sensible men.
1t might help YOU TO soak your head
in pail of warm water. Ii IL doan
you'd Letter put your head between
two freight kyars an let 'em come to-
gether on We. You may now resume
your seat. an IL the ailment continers
to grow on We I'll look about for some
remedy which de club kin apply. y
Detroit Free Press
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1887-07-23

Conniosscur tell you what L Is,
McDaub. those buzxards are simply
superb. You shouldn't paint anything
but birds. Artist (disgusted) Those
are not buzzards- They are angels
Tepds Strings.
Master Tommy is ont walking with
his mother. Seeing colored man, he
exclaimed: "Ol wouldn't like to be
as black as that!' "what an idea"
"Yes, because then l shouldn't have
to bother about washing my face
The Judge.
Gilhooly--"It does me good every
time read OF rich man marrying
poor girl" Gus De Smith--"why
does il do you good:" because then
the rich girl he might have mar
ried still remains In the market. and
am looking out for rich wife myself"
EDchdDge.
Sam Johnson, an Austin. Tex. col
ored man. was hired by the Celebra-
ton Committee TO touch of the fire.
works. The day after the glorious
Fourth, Parson whangdoodle Baxter
of the Blue-Light Tabernacle, hap
penning to call at the Johnsing man
sion, the latter said banteringly: did
you see fireworks las night, parsony'
l did, Mister Johnsing." II reckon.
parson, dat ar red fire and de yellin'
oh de crowd sortcr remined me ob dat
hell yer preach so much about" Hit
did. Mister Johnsing for fac. pertic-
kererly when seed You in de middle
OBJ de flames" -TeIaS SVtiRgS.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1887-07-23

Mr.. Elliott tells how the Alaskan
seals feed regularly upon Goldfish, eat
ing all the fish except the head. This
part OF the fish Is rejected because the
teeth are too hard for digestion. An
English writer. Mr.. Reynardson. con-
firms this story with some observations
of his own at the mouth OF the river
Mop. In Ireland.
Then s big bastes, anywise." said
Terry.
"Sure, they're waiting to come up
after the salmons when the tide turns" "
said Mike, "i'll engage therell be a
great run Of salmon this tide"
s'Sure. Nick" says Terry. syou'll
mind the salmon atlng the sale. and
holding him under his ARM"
What do you mean. Terry" said 1,
''by a salmon eating seal, aud hold
ing him under his arm"
"Ah, nat at ALL" said Terry. ''Sure,
/ meant a sale ating a salmon. and
holding him under his arm; sure, I've
say'd him do II more than once"
"Well," said L, "Terry, I've heard
that Irishmen can sometimes tell lie,
IL required. but never heard of any
one telling so big one as you can"
"Sure, it's truth I'm telling your
amer" said Terry. .Sure. it's no lie
at all, atalL"
All OF sudden there was most
excited shout from Terry. "Ah. the
sale. Say the SALE Say the sale ating
the salmonl' And positive, believe IL
who can that has not seen il. there was
seal who seemed TO be almost stand
ing up In the water, with grilse OF
six or eight pounds grasped under his
Upper, and putting down his head and
eating IL.
ibid ger amer liver say the like Of
that now?" said Terry. "Sure. | was
thinking we'd niver say him getting
his dinner at all this day. Sure. yer
amer will behave that now, anyway.
Sure, yer amer say'd II yersel. Terry 8
not the boy that liver told his amer a
lie"
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1887-07-23

somsbo ly's chill IL dying -lyinx with
the nush OF hope on his young face. ami
somebody's mother thinking OF the tims
when that dear face will be hidden where
no ray OF hops can brighten it-beoauss
there Was no cure for consumption
Reader. II tho child be your neiyhbor's
take this comforting word to the mothers
heart before IL Is too late. Tell her that
consnm ption 10 durable; that men are liv.
ing to-day whom the physicians pro
nounced incurabls, because one lung hal
bssn almost destroyed by the disease.
DIR. Pisrcs's Golden Medical Discovery
has cured hundreds; surpasses God liver
oil. hypophosphitss, and other medicines
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1887-07-23

Westminster school retains its usage
of tossing the pancake" a ceremony
performed. says Watford's Antiquar
ian, before the whole school OF masters
OF boys by the cook, who essays TO toss
the pancake across the bar which
divides the upper from the lower
school; IL he succeed. the dean OF
Westminster Is bound by charter TO
present him with a guinea, which
honorarium Is also due TO the boy who
catches the pancake aud succeeds In
carrying IL OF unbroken TO the dean
cry. And though this may appear inn
possible 10 the uninitiated, having re-
gard 10 the himsy character Of the or
binary pancake, IL must be remem-
bered that the Westminster pancake
is about half an inch thick and about
six inches In diameter, and. moreover.
is made of flower and water only, and
left 10 harden for week; thus IL offers
some resistance to the struggling
hands OF the boys. On the other hand,
the cook, IL he fails 20 toss the pancake
over the bar. is punished for his awk.
wnrdness by being pelted with books.
IL Ia said that a master Of Westminis-
ter, himself an old scholar, still pre-
serves, under glass case, the valua-
BILE relic gained by himself some years
ago