The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1887-09-17
ESSAY ON FLIES.
A Hi mor.st Views After Study
OF Years.


AbAcShihn--So NIOutsL anu so UnaSSumtflg
AN Early Morning Experience.
learn with great pleasure that the
Royal Society Of England at its last
meeting listened to Il paper on flies,
and ordered it to be printed. am
very anxious to see that paper. As
rule, literary and scientific men have
avoided the subject of the fly. He has
been mentioned in but few select
poems; only one song, "Three Jolly
Flies" has been written in his honor,
and the encyclopedia merely calls him
Musca Vulgarits, and says he has six
legs, polygamous complexion, and
breathes through his ears. And vet
believe that through the long and
golden days of summer through the
balsam scented autumn and the season
Of following fields and purple twi-
light, the poet, the philosopher and the
man OF crucibles and big language
have each been given by beneficent
Providence, noble and frequent oppor-
tunities of Observing the beauties of
the fly.
l myself have studied flies for years,
and each spring, when wind and leaf
and bird are attuned to hymn the COM
ing summer, l find myself thoughtfully
taking up the subject again.
Is any thing more innocent or moral
than the flyP His ethical code permits
him to do just as he pleases, and from
his simple, but beautiful rule of life,
nothing can tempt him to depart Take
fly as you will, young or old, fat or
cmaciated, and you can see no flaw in
his morals. Such as it is, his character
is without a blemish.
How earnest and yet how naive is
the mind of the youthful fly. He has
no vanitys Nature gave him drab
body, a brown head with a silver stripe
down the middle, six contorted legs, a
pair of gauze wings and talent for
unremitting cussedness, and with these
few and primitive materials he makes
himself Of more Importance in the
world than the Siamese elephant or the
burberry whale. l have known great
men. deep in some complex problem of
vital interest to millions, to break vio-
lently from their labor to enjoy an hour
or two of communion with one light
hearted fly.
A fly is modest and unassuming. He
may be able to twist his legs into hard
knots, go to sleep upside down, waltz
In mid-air, maintain one steady line of
uproarious conduct for thirty-four days
without drawing breath, and perform
other almost incredible feats of endur-
ance and dexterity, yet he never blows
about any thing except a steak
awoke the other morning at day
break. l had wrapped the drapery of
my couch about me at three a. M, and
had contemplated sleeping more than
al hour. but just rs morn drew the
astral tapestry and Cyrus Fields milk
wagon Jared the perfumed silences of
Gramercy Park, l emerged from the
glory-tissued canopy of my childish
dreams greeted by three buoyant and
companionable flies.
The oldest and most deliberate fly
had assembled to the summit erected bv
my knees, and was still engaged in
personal adornment. He gave his Cog
giles a careful polish with his fore legs,
balanced himself on his middle legs,
braided his hind legs, and unraveled
them again with amazing rapidity.
Then he gave himself brisk rubbing
down all over, and cracked his heels
in a sudden and ribald manner He
lifted his wings, secured their interior
with the ball of his toes, tied his GEN.
trail legs into n hard knot, united them,
eurried himself gently on the side and
INDUCED his head in dry shampoo.
Having limbered up by this massage,
he tried his buzz. found it satisfactory,
vaulted lightly into the air and took a
musical turn about the room, inserting
himself in my left ear at full speed,
and lodging out with hooking laugh
just in the nick of time.
The second fly, who was younger and
inclined to be funny, busted himself
with the soles of my feet, while the
third had just discovered tunnel
under the sheet, and. being of scien-
tific turn of mind, boldly entered. with
a view to taking object lessons in
anatomy.
arose in wrath and smote the first
fly, but he was elsewhere at that mo-
mont. He had just discovered that
toothpaste is good to eat, and was re-
moving the rough edge from his appe-
tito. i collapsed the tented sheet and
crumpled it violently in the hope of
capturing the circus which had gone
through the tunnel, but the next mo-
ment saw that fly calmly braiding his
hind legs on the gas fixture, with the
sir of one who felt entirely at home. l
launched vicious and accurate kick at
the ticker, and he merely threw four
aerial somersaults and tobogganed
down my nose, then sailed over to the
window and exchanged winks with the
baffied flies outside.
1t is related of St. Xenephon di
Novara that he never killed fly. /
can readily believe it, unless the me-
dieval fly was considerably more dis
posed to lethargy than the civilized and
progressive fly of to-day. St-Xenephon
was canonized about two hundred
years ago, and after he had been dead
= long time. never could see exactly
why the honor was thrust upon him.
What is needed is an earnest and pains
taking saint who will 60 around and
kill all the flies, and l believe he would
be immortalized in month.
The encyclopedias speaks Of our ma
tive fly as ''house' fly. This, have
reason to believe, is entirely SUPER
fluous. He frequently takes charge of
house. But that is not remarkable.
There is nothing which fly. in the
height Of the season, does not consider
himself competent to run. ] had seven
dies travel with me ON the Saratoga
Limited. 80 that should not be lonely
during the night l have sailed to re-
r~Ak~hlk~I ~ .nI A.