New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1887-08-11
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

d
age overweight sho Is worth 100000. He
drinks Woodland IL scandalized. Tho young man
has been arrested charged with felony" 1t is sup
posed that tho crime he Is guilty of is stealing
woman" Tho latest dispaJcnes from Woodland
state, "Great excitement prevails in this city"
1t is said Dlogencs slept in tub. We suppose some
booy had to wiring him up in tho mornng--(Boston
Commercial Bulletin.
a picnic party came near having a splendid chance
survey the serpent the other day but Just a. he
enough for you % aud down he went.-(W ashington
Free fcsa
1t is said that the Indian name Chautaulua means
easy death "The Burlington Free Press always
supposed 1t meant talked to DEATH
Clyde Ohio, arrested boy the other night for steal
seven ca es OF arson and thirteen of larceny You
never knuw what's in a boy until you pinch him.
Detroit Free Press.
Dan" said a contractor to one of hs trusted
employees, when you down seeing about that
lime this morning | wish you would mention 70
Dempsey that / would like to have that little bill
paid You needn't press It, you know, but just
mon ion to him in an of-hand manner"
II got the money from Dempsey, SOFT, said Dan
I'm very glad you merely alluded to it In an
YES, sorr: | handed him the bill and tOwld him
II he didn't pay II would let off me hand and give
him a wipe in the Jaw that he wouldn't forget for
willie, and he paid 1t at wanst."-(Boston Courier.
Eaisin Is. the dried fruit of this Administration.
Is stil good test.-tLowell Courier
Matthias srlnoc of spilog CITY Mcdonald County.
Mo-. f. a full blooded Wyandotte Indian and million
aire. He is engaged with others now In building
a railroad from Kansas City to Fort Smith He Is
probably the only Indian railroad man In the United
States.
"What f. that man here for p inquired the Judge
as rlrd-rate variety actor was brought into court
For trying to Jump his board bi, yer honor"
What have you say for yourscltt
Nothing that ant what I'm here Tor. 1
was arrested for tryin' to improve me physique
Yes Judge / was t'rowin' out me chcst."-NIer-
chant Traveller.
The news that Stanley, the African explorer, is
don't want Stanley to collapse until he has caught up
with Rider Has gard in the matter Of discoveries ip
tho interior Of Afrca--tNorwich Bulletin.
The Chicago boOdlers lament the fact that there
is honor among thieves
An immense skull has been found in Virginia, and
now tho Mugwumps are hus iiu around when
., their number is dcad.-(Peora Transcript.
our esteemed contemporary, The Macon Telc-
graph. publishes q thrilling article How TO
Sacrifice Watermelon The best way OF sacrl-
ncng a Watermelon particularly II 1t T. tTfe stale.
Is to give to the other w-(Phladelphia Press
The tobacco crop Is failure. There is no'ing
the matter. however, with the cabbages. Havanas
will be a. plentiful
@Patsy. oivo bdn insulted. Mickey Doolan
called me a liar" said an excited freshman
An phwat yez gon' to do about TT
don't Know. IhWat WOulu you 90 aV yo Wor
"wcll, Dnny. OF think Ord tell the troOt oftener."
Washing on Critic
Man was created first. Woman sort Of
recrcatton.-(wcstern Times
judging from the paragraphs read every day.
New-Eng ind Editors, as we'll az New-Enaland barns
are much struck With the preya OF lightning this
summer.-(I4Owell Courier.
The former probably by Jersey lightning.
Reading Railroad engineers arc determined to re-
sist the color test They claim that the color line
was wiped out with the fifteenth amendment.-tPhil-
adelIIlia News.
Scranton, Penn. man has a cat which purrs
approvlngly whenever he plays the plano or organ
or guitar. But she draws the line at the violin. When
her master passes the bow over tho entrails OF one
Of her departed friends she grows savage, as he
Drinks, at tho indgnlty offered her species in the
construction of that instrument After all, this
curious animal may DO possessed only Of very
discerning Judgment.
Young shark has been on exhibition in the front
window OF restaurant In this city for several days
10 from Eastern seaport, but It's cOuntenance
has tho expression VI dealer In Kansas City real
cstate.-tChicago Tribune.
Connecticut man by the namo Of Peach overfed
his children with watermelon, and IL Is feared thai
the peach crop is ruined. burlington Free Press
american MlnonaireYes, | am very proud OF my
Yacht and hOle you enjoyed the sail.
American Naval Ohcer-lt was delightful You
spend most Of the summer yachting, l suppose
"Yes, | almost live In my boat"
an order to return the favor take pleasure sir.
I'm inviting you 10 take trip with the man-of
war which / have the honor to command
Thanks. captain, many thanks, put must U-
cline can't swim."-tOmaha World