Belmont chronicle. [volume] (St. Clairsville, Ohio) 1855-1973, 1887-06-09
T THE FIT BUSINESS. =
HOW DUBLIN PETED GETS A LIVING
FROM THE SYMPATHETIC.

An Epileptic Fit as . Minutes Notice.
Taking Up q Collection from . Tender
Hearted crovd-The Business Growing
Dull.
"Do you see that fellow standing over there
reedingn said q bartender in a down town
saloon the other night The man alluded TO was
standing with his back against the wall with
the paper 50 held up as to screen his face from
view He was Of ordinary size, with nothing
about him to attract attention.
"That man hB the most peculiar and novel
way of making living Of any other man In
the United States His name, as near as any
body has ever been able to learn, is Pete
People that are familiar with him have
dubbed him Dublin Pete That's the town
in Ireland he halls from He makes a good
living by having fits"
"Having fits!n
''Yes, sir, having fits. don't wonder yea
are surprised, but it is nevertheless fact.
That man can take fit 80 naturally at
minutes notice that no doctor in the city Of
New Yerk would ever doubt but that it was
q real epileptic fit"
"Oh, it is not real fit, thenF'
ScE odlLuJ uOb ~ OAlll AOOAc AAAC OIC1 Ou9
IT'S daisy"
"How does be make it payF'
"Well, he can tell you that better than
could possibly explain it to you. Hey, Pete"
The newspaper which the man had been
reading was dropped from before his face. It
certainly was q tough looking countenance.
BIS head sunk down between his shoulder
bades, like the head Of vulture, and was
bent forward in the same way. His under
Jaw was longer than the upper one, and gave
him the APPEARANCE of a bulldog with under
teeth showing. His little black eyes were
ovsrshadowed by q bulging forehead, and
spsrkled like those Of a snake. To make his
face still more bideous, his upper jaw was
totally devoid of teeth. Whenever he smiled
his mouth looked as though it was filed with
red flannel
"D'you twitter ter me, Billyr asked Pete,
ss he bent his head still further forward,
stuck the upturned cigarette he was smoking
In the corner of his mouth, and moved his
head from side to side, in the Bowery
manner.
@Yes, come here and let me introduce you
to friend of mine. He wants to talk with
YOU
dublin Pete" laid the newspaper on q
chair, and staggered over like an old South
Sea whaler. There was broad grin on his
face. Shrewd wrinkles shot from the corners
Of his eyes like the rays Of setting sun, and
his mouth assumed the shape Of the moon in
its first quarter, the corners trying to see how
near they could come to each eye. The
cigarette adhered to the corner Of his upper
lip and worked up and down at every motion
of his head
aProud ter know yer, young feller."
allow much did you make to-day, Peter
asked the bartender
swell, ter tell yer de trute, Billy, I never
fought ter count up. 'spose / raked in
bout four ds. Less see, answered the man
who has epileptic fits for a living, as he
screwed one side of his face into hideous
distortion and scratched the other side with
his index finger, as if trying to call something
into recollection. @When 1 come to on de
Jersey ferryboat de guys TUX up election
fer me of one and fifty C. Den wen
dropped on de floor of de Annex scooped or
cassr. Dat bloke on Whitehall street gim
me feed an twenty-five c. Yes, dat's about
wat went inter me kick since marnin'. All,
de business Is gettin' dull Folks is droppin'
onter me game"
Pete looked as though thoroughly dis
couraged at the dullness of trade.
"How did you make the moneyr he was
asked.
''How does make 1t, heyF" and Dublin
Pete" winked at the bartender, gave a little
chuckle, and said ''Fits. Yes, sir, Pm de
head of de profesh In de fit business. How do
I do it? Well, ! jes' gets onto a ferry
boat where dere's a gang Nv women, an,
when everything's quiet like an be boats in
de middle of de river 1 makes out like I'm
goin' out on de front end of de boat, and
when / gifts In the middle Of de floor drops
down In a fit. Whisky's brought an poured
down me troat, an when comes to I allus
tells dem it's cause I amt eat nawthin' all
day. DEN dey takes up election fer me.
Now you've got de whole racket"
GAre there any other men who earn money
by having itsa"
as deyi Well, I should snicker Dere's
six er dem in dis city; but none er denis got
de snap down fine but me. I'm de boss on
6ts All er dem uses soap fer ter make de
foam come in der mouth. don't. makes
de genewine foam No soap suds in mine.
lIixey.n
Pete turned his back to the bar, put his
thumbs In bis suspenders and assumed an air
Of superiority.
GDont you ever get spotted by people who
may have seen you beforeT
swell, should giggle."
He didn't giggle though, but edited the re-
porter with one of BIS red flannel smiles.
Pete then related in his rough vernacular
an experience he had ia going down one
day to Coney Island on board an excursion
boat. He began to sing, but finding no
money in his voice he fa'l to the deck in a fit
The steward, who had evidently seen him be-
fore, administered a tu Iblerful of salt water
and mustard, which mare. him succumb
sYait minute" said the bartender, as the
Journalist was about taking his leave, aand
I'll lock the door and ask Pete to show you
how he has fits"
Accordingly the door was locked and Pete
staggered to the center of the room, remark
ing:
apn give it to you mild, SO holler when
you've got dose"
Scarcely had he concluded when his form
became rigid except his head, which turned
from side to side, his eyeballs rolling until at
times only the whites were visible Suddenly,
with an unearthly yell, be fell to the floor,
and what appeared to be his head struck with
crash. He kicked and gasped and wriggled
in pitifrI manner, actually frothing at the
mouth. After cry of @EnoughI" from the
reporter, he slowly opened his eyes and looked
around in dazed way, spoke a few words at
random apparently and said:
aHows data Amt it daisy7n
The reporter admitted it.
GBut didn't you hurt your head?"
aAh, DAT wusnt me head-dat wus me
shoulder blades.n
HWhen did you first begin the fit business?"
II learned de whole biz in the protec., where
was iugged when wus a kid. Times IS
gittin' played out round here. I'm goin' ter
Frisco nex' month, where de peop. amt never
heard of de fake. But it's time fer me ter go
up in front of de t'eatre an have a fit.
Ta-ta"
And the professional fit taker staggered
out Of side door.-New York Evening Sun.
Brooklyn, with its estimated population Of
800, 900, is without public library or anart
gallery.
Useful Broom Handles.
% not throw away the worn out broom
handles When you have three just alike,
raake pretty and useful reading table. The
hsgs should be thirty-four inches long, with
che ends sawed of, standing in the op-
slosita directions in order that the ton NAV