Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1887-08-25
Bill Nye and the Mormons.

The great summer attraction at the
| museum seems to be a Mormon aggre-
| CATION under the auspices of Elder
Joshua Baker. Elder Baker is ac-
companled by three wives and q
pianist. Joshua Baker was born in
kentucky ard afterward moved to Ala
| bama. In the latter State he was for
some years methodist preacher, but
| at the age of 10 light suddenly broke
in on his dark-end understanding, and
he embraced the blessed promises and
| breaches of promises incident to Nor
monism. He then went to Utah, where
| one country, one flag, and one wife at
time is not the motto. He then
entered into polygamous relations with
several additional wives, until he had
acquired enough to maintain him in
comfort
Elder Baker sits calmly in Bowery
museum during these long, hot days,
and by the sweat of his brow tries to
earn an honest livelihood by advertis-
ing his assortment of infamy He may
be found there on a raised platform,
also on bail. Under the Edmunds law
he was arrested on the charge of poly
gamy and served three months, so that
he now comes to us rested and re-
freshed from the ninety days of quiet
in the Zion pen.
AS proof that large head is not
always guarantee of success in life, (
may here state that Elder Bakers head
is not large. His ears are powerful and
well balanced, but it would take three
or four brains like his to attract the
attention of hungry mackerel. Ap-
parently Elder Baker only uses his
head to keep his ears from falling
apart.
Iattended the morning services at the
Mormon Tabernacle at Salt Lake City
five years ago, but do not remember
having seen Josh at that time Some
thing about him, however, called up
memory of the occasion. Probably it
was certain air of repose and miasma
that seemed to lurk around him.
The Baker family, according to the
programme, consists of twenty-four
children, four wives, and one husband,
but under the new law the elder has
made an assignment of all his wives
but one. She can readily be distin-
guished by the look of deep gloom she
wears. The others are neither maids,
wives, nor widows to any marked de-
gree, but pose as matrimonial mug
wumps and look upon their herd of
thin, Wailing children with apparent
regret.
Josh wears a full beard, cropped
close, but long and searching look up
his coat sleeve did not reveal any evil
dence of shirt. He is rather tall and
in Io+
materially retarded the growth of grass
in Utah while he was there.
The old man occupies one end of the
exhibition hall, surrounded by his
wives and his feet. His children fill
up the intervening space between the
end of the room and the Railway girl,
who still dumbly appeals to the spec.
tators to come forward and identify
her SO that she can 90 away.
The courts of Utah assigned to Elder
Baker as wife large, powerful woman
about eighteen hands high, whose hair
insists upon unwinding itself and stick
ing out like the tail of disabled steer
in fiytime. The two wives, who have
been retired on half pay, are not form
ing a part of the elders family circle
at present, but assist at the exhibition
for old acquaintance sake. They are
not strikingly beautiful and probably
will rot marry again unless there
should be great mortality among all
the other women Of the world In that
case some man who doesn't care much
for beautiful scenery might, between
lucid intervals, marry the more at
tractivo one of the two. The other
one viii probably remain in statu quo,
rounding up the thriving young found
ling asylum bestowed upon her by
Joshua as a Slight testimonial of re-
gard.
A photograph of Elder Baker and his
family looks like the picture Of a pros
porous reform school III It's senior year.
| could hardly refrain from wishing
that the old man had kept house this
summer down by the rip-roaring sea,
where | could have gone and boarded
with him and felt the refining III.
fuences of home life. Twenty-four
children and ten mavericks who would
be willing to leave their bread and
molasses in fine chairs would make a
man with a new pair of light, sensitive
trousers stick to simple diet all sum-