Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1887-02-23
GASTRONOMiC SAYINGS.
Some of the Clever Things said Apropo
of Dining.

Some of the Clever Things said Apropos
OF Dining.
George l. while on journey to Han.
over stopped at village inn in Hol-
land, and while the horses were getting
ready ordered two or three eggs to be
brought to him, for which the host
charged him two hundred forms.
"How is this'" said tho King; eggs
must be very scarce at this place tc
bring hundred forms apiece"
Pardon me, your Majesty" said the
host, "eggs are plentiful enough, but
Kings are scarce" The King smiled
at the fellows wit and ordered the bill
to be paid
Lord Norbury, the Irish Judge, was
once dining at a table, and corned
beef forming one of the dishes he was
asked ifhe would try slice. II would
try it," he said iii it were hung
Curran, who was present, rep lied: III
you were to try it, Judge, it would be
sure to be hung"
| A gentleman at table being requested
to carve a dish before him, which
CHANGED to be loin OF mutton, took
up the carving-knife, asking: "Shall
| cut it saddlewisep" "You had bet.
ter cut it bridlewise," replied one of
the guests, "for then we all may get q
bit in our mouths"
Sir Nicholas Bacon being once, in
the capacity of Judge, about to pass
the sentence Of death upon a culprit,
the fellow importuned him to save his
life, alleging, among other things, that
he had the honor of being relation OF
his Lordship. ''How do you prove
thatp" said Sir Nicholas. my Lord, :"
replied the man, "your name is Bacon
and mine is Hog, and hog and bacon
have in all ages been reckoned akin"
"That is true" answered the Judge,
"but hog is never bacon till it is hung,
and therefore, until you are hung, you
can be no relative of mine"
A youth who had studied logic and
philosophy at Salamanca had returned
to his home, and, being seated at sup
per. his father said to him: "Well,
my son, l suppose you have learned
enough of medicine to cure folks and
law to plead for them?" mo, father,
| have not learned these, but l have
learned philosophy and am consum.
mate master of logic" "Whatis that?"
"Why, logician is one who can make
something out OF nothing; for example,
here on this dish, you will observe, are
two chickens; of these by my art can
easily make three" Howl said the
father, "Simply by adding tho two on
the dish two this one (picks up one OF
thcm) two and one, you know, make
three" Every true" said the old
man. "YOur mother and 1 will take
these two and you may have the other
as a reward for your logic"
Poggio, the Florentine, tells us that
Iisca, the great and victorious re.
former of Bohemia, was blessed with
such an exquisite palate that, when
asked what share of the gastron omic
plumber would please him, replied:
1.-The cobwebs-give me only the cob
webs which hang from the roofs of the
farmers houses" These eco bwebs,"
however, turned out to be hams, gam
mons, sausages and pigs cheeks, for
which Bohemia was always celebrated.
GUMS noted epicureanism and brutal
wit are well illustrated by the following
anecdote which history asserts to be
strictly true: He was invited to dine
with celebrated Duchess who had
adorned the court of Queen Anne, and
whose protection of prosecuted wits
had justly rendered her famous.
While seated at table she had helped
hersclf-the story goes--to the leancst
part of "a haunch of venson which stood
before her. Quin watched her for
moment in surprise, and then burst out
with: what! and does your Grace
eat no fat?' mot of vcnison, SIR"
| said the Duchess ''Nevcr, my ladyp"
Never, assure you" This admission,
in the eyes of Quin, seemed the hight
of barbarism, and, forgetting even the
bounds of decency, he exclaimed,
"Well love to dine with such fools!"
-Chtcd0o Tribune,