The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1887-12-31


-Teacher-Correct the sentence; "The
liquor which the man bought was drank"
Smart BoY-The man who bought the Ii
quor was drunk.
NERVOUS lady passenger lin train, after
passing temporary bridge) Thank good
ness, we are now on terra firma! FacetIouf
gentleman-Yes, ma'am, less terror and
more firmer.
Catarrh cured, health and sweet breath
secured, by Shiloh's Catarrh Remedy. Price
so cents. Nasal Injector free. Sold by Dr.
Horn, Lehighton, and Biery, Weissport
England pays $15,OoO,OOO a year for
eggs. Neither the sun nor the hen seems
to "set' on British territory.
Group, Whooping Cough and Bronchitis
Immediately relieved by Shiloh's Cure
Sold by DIR. Horn, Lehighton, and Biery.
Weissport.
Two kinds of Metal braid combined
with black or brown make charming
effect.
That hacking cough can be SO quickly
cured by Shiloh's Cure. We guarantee it.
Sold by DIR. Horn, Lehighton, and Biery,
Weissport.
Dull shades in all colors are as much
worn as those more brilliant.
"A shoulder cape and muff of ostrich
feathers is novelty this season.
Will you suffer with Dyspepsia and Liver
Complaint? Shiloh's Vitalizer is guaranteed
to cure you. Sold by DIR. Horn, Lehighton,
and Biery, Weissport.
-Advices FROM the Orkney Islands re-
port the loss of twenty fishing snacks in a
hurricane.
twenty-five persons were drowned and
in the recent hurricane off the Orkney Is
lands.
This great remedy will ward off, as we'll
as cure all Malaria Diseases, and for all
Kidney, Liver and Stomach Disorders
stands unedualed. Price 50c. and 81, at
L. d. Thomas
The young college debater will argue
for hours that the pursuit of happiness is
better than the realization, and then feel
disappointed because his girl refuses for the
fourth time to marry him.
The man who wagers not is better than
better.
Held by the enemy-the ulster you are
unable to redeem.
1t is the shop pie that often furnishes
the piece that passeth the understanding.
The gatekeeper at the railway crossing
should invariably be a man of single
abilities.
There is rotation in office, ami ther
again there is a potation in office. Bott
are common.
-Fred-rm surprised at Browns sland
ers, for supposed he thought everything
of me. Ned-So he does-eVerYthing that
bad.
And now the equilibrious pedestrian
on Lehighton's slippery sidewalks says il
accents mufiled but meaningful, "Ny sou
be on thp guard"
An all-round wag has placed the fol
lowing placard over his coal bin: Not Il
be used except in casefo fire." The cook
relatives are IN CONSERVATION.
An exchange speaks of Deaths Fa
tai Work" When death tackles a Job hi
work is generally fatal. There may be ex
ceptions, but they are not ON record.
Two Ohio farmers recently fought
duel with rails. The reason they chos
such weapons was because the challenges
party thought he was no slough at fencing
"A western man writes to us as follows
''Money is so tight out here now, and ha
been for some months, that wish yol
would send Francis Murphy to it with
car load of blue ribbon"
The man whose step bladder collapse,
when he was hanging his fathers portrait
bringing the picture down on the top of hi
head, says it is a striking likeness of tn
old man.
Managing editor to stan post-Mr
Spondee, have you begun your holiday cd
yet?
Staff Poet-Yss, sir; Fve bought lot o
presents and haven't paid darn cent o.
them.
-Guestlsuspiciously eying the fia,tene
pillows and the crumpled sheets Loo
here, landlord, this bed has been slept in
Landlordltriumphantlyl-Thats wha
it's fur
Brown and black are very stylish i
combination and are much used this season
Fox otter or brown marten is used I
trim coats for infants and small children
Green leather of a light shade is vGr
fashionable for pocket books and athe
small articles.