Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1887-02-28
BRIGHT BITS.

AN Eastern woman is lecturing on the sub
Ject: Nv hat tires us!" She tslks and talks,
ana the audience guesses what il is before she
gets through taking. -CLe5ehtnd Sun,
THERE is more pleasure in giving than in
receiving" was the proverb that mother
wa, Trying to instlh into youthful mind,
How about castor oi?" was the answer
she got.-Cari P,etsepS Weekly.
If character ia formed by what men eats
And who'll deny 1t?
line man who in car takes up tyvo seats,
Makes pork his diet.
Boston G urier.
II say, dOctaw. cawn't YOU give me some
think for this noWwid cold? Don'cherknow,
Il keeps me sneezing all the time ana it's aw :
FULLY hard on these high collars. Cawn't
pay my laundry bills. Kerchew! There goes
another. all broken down."-BOston TRIMS
cript.i
A CAFE concert singer who has caught
cold. asks his doctor if it is true that fresh
eggs clear the voice and favor the production
OF sound. II am of that OPINION" replied
ksculaplus with imperfurbable serenity
'LOos at the hens themselves; whenever thew
lay an egg they Immediately begin TO sing -
french Fun.
ri DON'T exactly understand this inter-
state commerce BILL" he said as he looked up
from his paper.
Pm only posted ON one point" was the du-
bious reply,
1T cuts off my dead-head pass. 1 don't
care to understand any more. . Val STREE
Ne7oss -,
Mrs. Rongwerd wssin trouble about some
thlng she had said. and ady was talking to
ner about it. II don't Ihink," sobbed Mrs
n, "that ever made such remark" II
.eg your pardon. my dear" replied her
irlend' but | heard you say it," well.
perhaps did, but If | did it was an ignis
fatuus, and don't think l ought to be blamed
Tor IL WdshtngtOn Critic.
Pm SORRY can't join you, boys, am
really, was the reply of Rochester drum
mer last eveniugto an invitation to "play a
little 50-cent limit" "You see il was only
two days ago that my girl gave me a long
lecture about breaking the Sabbath, and
promised her ia never play any more poker
that day. Make it hearts at a nickel heart
ana Ilheo Sou."-BuTdLO o. uTisr.
OMAHA MAN-What is the price of par
quet seat now?
Ticket seiler-Twenty-6v cents.
"How aboutlthe baicony?n
"They aresl.
''Well, 1 WON'T bother about the EXPENSE.
hats"
Yes, sir; gallery seats are s3.-onsaha
Void. aF#
A WELL KNOWN cIergyman's little daughter
has just been put to bed. and upon the still
ness comes tiny voice in the nightly PRAYER
Then. silence. soon broken by these words /:
"And, dear Lord, this afternoon / saw out
upon the cold sidewalk poor little girl ana
she had no shoes or 8 ockings on-and-and"-
another silence as though staggered by the i'm
menslty OF the problem-''it's none of our
business, is it, GOdF'-BoSton Transcript.
"RICHEs take unto themselves wings and
ny away said the teacher; "what kind of
riches Is meantp' And the smart bad boy at
the loot of the class said he ''Teckoned they
must be ost-riches And the only sound
that broke the ensuing silence was the sound
mat real smart boy makes when. without
saying SO In just so many words he seeks TO
convey-and usually does convey-the i'm
preston that he Is in great patn.-Burdette.
MISSISSIPPI GENERAL-Say. Mr.. Secre-
tary, not long ago we asked for a couple of
the biggest cannOns in the country for the
state militia TO practice with at our annual
camp.
Secretary of War-That's all right, at
tended to it.
"but they have not arrived yet."
"Ihats queer. Guess the postm aster must
have put them in the wrong box.'-OlaaAa
World,