St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1887-12-11
A FOOLS WISDOM.

passenger trains. Various documents
lately issued by this commission and
bearing the signature of that unique
public character, ELI WARNER, have
announced that the commission was
tearing its pants to have the danger les
Sened upon passenger trains. The COM
mission inspected the apparatus pro-
ylded by the companies and approved
it. All this has been farce of the
worst nature. Within the last fortnight
L have travelled over several railways in
this state which the commission has
blessed with its sanction of their fire
apparatus. On one road found placed
in the end of each car a small fire ex-
tinguisher. The conductor laughed
when pointed to them.
YES" he said, ''they are for fire pro-
lection; but, Lord bless you. they are
absolutely worthless. They don't hold
more than quart of fluid. and that
wouldn't extinguiSh match.'
On another road l saw hand grenadeS
hung up. When it is understood that
III the fire departments of large cities
20O-gallon chemical engines can scarcely
control a fire that has any headway,
what is to be expected of these small
grenadeS and fire eXtinguiSherS? Com
petent railroad men tell me that one
severe shock to train would absolutely
uCStlOa lIlC VI tiltSe eNllIl-
guISherS, and that in case of fire they
are not to be depended on one moment.
Why are they put on the trains? TO
comply" said a railroad official, laugh
ing, with law that the state commits
sion is enforcing in the letter, but not
the spirit"
The people are long in coming to an
understanding III respect to wrongs in
tilcted upon them. But if they ever re-
allZe what the present railroad commits
sion was appointed for, their wrath
must be terrible. Gov. MCGILL was
urged to appoint men to it who would
enforce the laws. What did ne do? He
chose JOHN l.. GIBBS to destroy the lat
ter's ambition for the goyernorship; he
chose HORACE AUSTIN to cancel a p0-
litical debt. and he retained Gen.
BECKER because the law compelled him
to appoint Democrat. Despite all the
protests of sensible and wise men he
retained Eli WARNER because Of the
latter,S capability as a partisan pOliti-
clan. As now constituted | find the
principal work of the commission to be
i'll filling minor Offices with either pOiit-
zeal henchmen or relatives. l took the
list the GLOBE published some time ago
OF appointeeS under the commission. |
handed it to prominent Republican
and asked him who these men We're.
His answers ran like this:
This is a relative of ELI WARNER
''And so is this one"
''IIe worked for GIBBS"
"A friend of Capt. JAMES"
He voted for MCGIIL.."
cone of WARMERS friends"
This one got his position by giving
up his seat in the state convention 10
WARNER"
This one helped Hunt"
Not one word said as to their capahil-
tiles for the positions appointed solely
because they were the creatures of po-
litical machine. File on such appoint
mentS and the men who make them!
~
FRANCIS BAASEN. postmaster at New
Clm, and in the early history of Mime
sofa secretary of state, bore for long
time the peculiar nickname of 'BUNG
BAASEN." 1t was in 1860 or 80 that lie
received this title. There had been Il
lynching at Monticello, and the excite
ment caused by it led the governor to
order out the local militia companies of
st. Paul and send them up there. As
one of the governors staff BAASEN went
along. He was an ardent temperance
man i'll those days. On his arrival at
Monticello he found that some of the
soldiers had brought along Il key of
beer. That was too much for his dig
nifty. Waiting until it was dark, he
found the keg, knocked the bung i'll and
ran the liquor out. In revenge he was
dubbed ''BUNG BAASEN = and the name
stuck to him for years.
am reminded by the presidents free
trade message of some of the trash pro
tectionist Republicans i'll this state have
offered to the public in support of their
side of the question. Ten years or more
ago, when MARK III. DUNNEIL was Il
protectionist, he said this i'll a political
speech delivered i'll the southern part
of the state:
II was at FairmOnt the other night
delivering q speech. An old farmer
sitting on the front scat rose and asked
me this question:
eff a wagon costs 500 in the United
States and $50 i'll Canada. why can'tI
be allowed to buy my wagons i'll Canada
without paying duty?
Fellow citizen" | said to that man,
''if the American wagon isn't good
enough for you, you are luxurious"
Mr. DUNNELI. has reformed since
then on the tariff question. but the above
is fair sample OF protection rot.
Anther form of argument used 10y the
Republicans against the Democrats is
well illustrated by portion of a speech
made in this state some dozen years age
by WILLIAMWINDOM, late of Minnesota.
Mr.. WINDOW had worked his audience
I'D to fever heat by describing the
dangers the country faced through hav-
ing a Democratic house of representa-
tiveS.
MY friends he said, sat the last ses-
sion of congress the Democrats abOl-
iShed forty-three of our foreign con-
suar stations. They claim they did this
because their support cost thousands OF
dollars, and they were of no benefit.
They point to this act as one of re-
trenchment.
my friends, shall [ tell you why they
abolished these forty-three consulates?
''Why did they do it?
because they wanted to haul down
the American flag i'll forty-three foreign
ports"
Think of this from a sane mana man
with whiSkers-a man who has been re-
ferred to as a NeStor of wisdom, And
still Minnesota remains Republican.
The free trade Republicans in this
tate find themselves between Scylla
and CharybdiS by the presidents mes
sage and the certainty of the ren0mina-
ton of BLAINE. Gen. j. II. BAKEE,
who is a free trader, said the other
evening:
Il am in the position Of RANDALL. L
must quit my party now or eSpOuSe
principles | don't believe ill.,"
Democrat asked GORDON E. COLE
free trader what he thought of the
message. He could not disapprove of it,
but did not believe it would aid in the
Of pr
Hang it ALL replied the Democrat
''you can't prevent BLAINE's nOmiAa-
ton. In Western parlance lie has you
by the slack of your pants"