The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1887-08-04

meddls with the affairs Of men be propi-
tious this time, and butter the well-laid plans
of mice and men so that this thing may go
through without shock. The country cannot
stand many shocks unless the weather changes.
The President Of this United states--we like
to consider this Nation in the singular number
lis going to st. Louis. He is going. The so
days of agony, suspense, uncertainty, impas-
stoned appeal, coy reluctance and timid deelina-
ton are over, and the President, double-shotted
with sense Of the Presidential dignity, is go
ing to st. Louis, just as everybody, including
the President, knew he would go days ago.
The country is not startled at the announce
ment; it is relieved, perhaps, because the farce
Of fought We to Visit Them2" is nothing
new, and in this presentation was bit tiresome.
The President is going to st. Louis.
Last week Charley Pearlgioss, with Starch
& Fixem, white goods, went TO st. Louis. The
firm told him to go Monday morning. And
Monday night found Mr. Pearlgloss in the
sleeper snoring his way toward st. Louis, with
checks in his pocket for more and bigger trunks
than the President Of the United States will
carry. His wife and the house knew he was
going. Nobody else said anything about it.
And yet Charley Pearlgloss win make more
out Of his st. Louis trip than the President
viii.
Why, there is nothing in going TO ST. Louis
| to make such fuss about. Anybody can go to
st. Louis who can raise s22. 'Tisn's much Of
place to 20 to. The President Of this United
States won't stay there after he gets there.
Nobody ever does. A thousand dollars TO one,
| the President Of the United States won't stay
| In st. Louis 10 days after he sees what kind of
place it is. The President Of this United
States has never been there, or he wouldn't 90
now, Why didn't he go to st. Louis long ago,
when fares were down, if he has been wanting
to go SO long and SO badly as he processes?
There was nothing to hinder.
There is nothing to hinder anybody going to
St. Louis. It isn't much Of feat If the en-
tire Grand Army Of the Republic, and the Free
and Expected Masons, the Knights Of Pythias
and the Ancient Order of Benighted Workmen
should lift their voices in chorus and shrek
that they didn't want Charley Pearlgloss to
come to st. Louis, Charley would go all the
same. IL they said they would stay away If
he came, he would tell them to stay away, and
ne could sell more white goods. Why, every
week there are people who go to Sc. Louis who
are not wanted there. People go there who
are dreaded by their own relatives. People 20
there without invitations even, and stay for
weeks. With the invitation he has, the Presi-
dent of this United States could stay al Win
ter, and go to shaw's Gardens every day. Why,
dearly beloved, the dying thief went to heaven
and didn't make half so much fuss about il as
| the President Of the United States does about
going to st. Louis, which is only way-station
/ on that line.
We are, however, really glad the President
of the United States is going to st. Louis That
repetition is little tires0me, and If we were
writing about the first President Of the United
we would sinpIy say Washington. But the
present President Of the United States is very
sensitive, and complains that be is not treated
as the President Of the United States should be,
and we are anxious to humor him, lest he should
once more take ofense and say that he wouldn't
90 TO St Louis. We want the President of the
United States to 20 to st. Louis, that he may see
how many other people go there. We hope he
will stand around down at the Union depot
we assure him the depot was not so named in
and not lose pound Of Presidential dignity
and see the people come in, without invita-
tions. We hope for the sake Of rewarding the
| Jeffersonian simplicity Of the hand-painted IN
vitation that comes on special train, the Presi-
dent of the United States win go clear on to
Kansas City and see the cable cars run up hill.
i If he could goto Knob Knoster, so that he could
see which was the Knob and which the Knos-
ter, it would be great medicine for the Presi-
dent Of the United States. BE would then have
travelled, and would know more than the Presi-
dent Of the United States does now. Not much
more, perhaps, but some. Travel, even though
one only goes to st. Louis and Knob Knoster,
broadens one. True, the President Of the United
States has travelled some, but then Holland
Patent and Saranac Lakes are not so remote,
unfriended, solitary, slow" as Goldsmith, who
evidently knew what he was writing about,
says St. Louis IS.
Let US all then, citizens of the great Repub-
lie of which Grover w. Cleveland is President,
in the absence of Daniel Lamont, let Us all,
Methodists, Presbyterians, Catholics, Baptists.
Col. IngersolI, Knights of Labor, GAR men;
all citizens, in view of the great rest which the
country and its Pres-beg pardon-the Presi-
dent and His country may obtain By this visit
to St. Louis, resolve that we will not hinder
NOISY, BUT