The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1887-10-14
What Is Refinement 2


One hears much talk of this desira-
BILE quality now "a days but the idea of
it is often very vague. What is refine
ment !?
We are not of those who think that
it consists simply in a studied quie--
ness of dress and manner. Some very
refined people dress shockingly and
they even have quite loud voices, and
yet their good breeding is quite patent
to all the world.
We once met whole family of deli
cate ladies at fashionable resort on
the banks of the Hudson whose idea of
refinement was languor and i'll health.
They thought it was just too vulgar to
be healthy aud strong; quite too man
nish indeed in lady!
Among some people, size is thought
to have a good deal to do with refine
ment. 1t is unrefned to be large, gross
to be fat; course to have weight and
monstrous to have prominent features.
A large neck, large cheeks or lips are
especially opposed to all refinement.
Now little people are certainly very
cunning, very curious, but we cannot
all be fairies-nor do we wish it. Only
fancy whole world of these little
creatures. Why even trade would Ian
guish. Smaller quantities of every
thing would be needed, from cloth and
flannel all the way down to oysters and
buckwheat cakes. No, large people are
necessary to keep the world moving.
We once knew of a fashionable lady
who liked her clergyman because he
preached such refined sermons When
distinguished literary man died re-
Gently, we were told he was not re-
fined person. Well, perhaps he was
not. but he was so distinguished In
other ways that really We had not
thought of his refinement. would
lust as soon have asked whether st.
Paul was a refined man, or whether
Isaiah went to ancient Babylon to ac-
quire "good form,' as some persons go
to London now for that purpose!
There are come people who are al
ways trying to be refined. Like Rosa
mond in "Middlemarch," they have so
trained themselves that, by the help of
nice clothes, a sweet voice, a placid de-
meanor, they appear outwardly to be
refined.
They are, were believe, many people
in very humble station in life who
are truly refined inItheir feelings who
are yet quite unpublished outwardly.-
Their hearts are right, they have the
consideration for others, which is the
very basis of refinement.
There are also others in good society
whose natural sweetness Of disposition
constantly shows itself in kind and
gentle words and deeds toward ALL
No effort is needed on their part to be
courteous and amiable, for they feel so,
and naturally their outward manners
are but the reflex of that which is with
in. Such persons are charming; they
like everybody and everybody likes
them. We all know few such, and
are thankful.
The chief desideratum appears to be
a good heart. If we truly love our
neighbors we cannot fail to be kind
and sweet to them. And if we are in-
different all the care we take of our
manners, all our studied refinement,
all our stylish conversation will be as
dust and ashes.
There are those who find it difficult
to care for their neighbors. They wish
them we'll, but do not want to be both
cred with them. They always try to
be civil, but it is uphill work, and they
are glad when the trial is ever. Their
refinement may make them smile
and bow and say eyes" and "No" at
proper intervals. But have they moth
ing more ? 1t there no interest felt
except in their departure
Nothing is valuable unless genuine.
Who cares for paste diamonds and i'm
itation cut glass Outward polish is
of slight worth without the true re-
finemeut of the heart.
Some men find fault because they
are never lucky enough to find any
thing else.