New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1887-09-11
THE TALK OF THE ID Y.

| When German opera Is given In Denmark It muss
| be sung In Danish. Tho reason Is that there Is
| great aversion to anything German In Denmark
| At a baseball gane-"Is it good or bad thing
ait depends entirely upon whether your mamma
knows n not" George SroWieo' IL ult1T nnPao
| characterization transcript.
Tho following advertisement, recently published In
| "The Deserot Newsv of Salt Lake CITY, shows how
carefully the Mormons guard against the possibility Vi
| Gentiles coming into salt Lake City:
House and Lot for sale.L0L - b. &c sas; house
| to a Latter-Day saint No other need apply; Apply
| at SAT D. second hest-st. o-INsit
Professor Bunge Of the University Of Basle, says
that beer is the misch!eo us of alcoholic bow
| erages, because 1t is the most seductive.
AT the sunday school Tcaehei-N liiam, What
is the Golden Text today
Wiiiiam-Dunno -. -,
Nillianl-DunnO. r..
Teacher-Thnk again. What did your papa do iuss
'e William with sainationJ~kissed mammal How'd
yuu anow !-tTd-Bhs
SAYS school TEACHER in Of the country districts
| of Kentucky: "one OF my scholars was taken out OK
school because 1 enaeavored to persuade him thar
the earth Is round. His father thought he was in
danger of being made nfdel by being taught such
nonsense. | saw the and tried TO Impress the
/ fact upon him. We had a public debate which lasted
two weeks before crowded houses. He admitted
that there were many hills and mountains for tho
earth to be exactly nat, and finally went so far as
10 say that the earth might be round this ere way
meaning east and west cause tho people might fall
Off but It Is not round this 'er way (mcaDing north
| and south"
| Why don't some OF the young folk get married.
We could write up the affair in fine style, and then
| wo could tell you how enjoyed the nice piece Of
| cake you sent us.-tFreesone (Tex.) News.
| sThe Boston Transcript which knows all about
such things. says that II waa, to get good idea
VI tnnltuous motion, you should watch the astston
| of the busties OF two dancing a hop waltz.
| An exchange speaks OF tho @the ideal grumber.,
| "growor." The latter. we've been iol holds about
| a quart. The ideal grumbler may hoiG more
| tNorristown Herald.
Says land boomer of Wichita. Kansas: ~we will
be in St. Louis when Cleveland gets there and induce
him to visit our magic city. We have outd1nc L.
St. Louis, Louisville and Atlanta Invitations, by plant
ing In late corn, hve-acre lot, an Invitation tn
the President accept our hospitality. TIE corn
will DO I've feet high during the first week Of October
and the effect wn1 prove quite striking II tho
President can come out. VIC viii have bird seye
photograph taken OF the field and send IL 10 him heN
fall"
summsr-resort Man-BIe The only objection IS
that many of them run or Without paying thcir
bills. = Burlington Free Press
Gorismith's Geography published in 1924 describing
the Cntel States, People become Old In America
sooner than In Europe. Upon females the influence
OF the climate Is still sensible When young tho
women are generally beautiful particularly In Phs-
depha after twenty hey begin to lose their fresh
color and teeth and at the ago Of twenty five many
of them would pass for Europeans at forty. What
funny things those old biographies were, to be sure
All Arranged.-omaha Dame (reading,-" An Albany
matchmaker. % whom watch that hal been dfoppei
overheard o fishing excursion Wa taken, found
Of the works were SO badly rused that they
watch In oil you took 1t out Of the water:
o. Ss mad into yoS o ay bS
'AI HUSBAND (rnusinsiy,-weu. woui Never thought
Never thought of what. dearr,
to take might get excited who pulling In big hsh
and upset tho boat"
"You swim p
s YES !, but .asn ~ > watch wouIa got wet"
eyes I'll Just take jug Of strong liquor along
to drop 1t into. -tonaha World
1t is said that clergymen who minister In churches
which the old fashioned galleries are seldom or
never afflicted with "eleryman's sore throat Tho
reason given Is that this malsdy is caused by tho
clergyman looking down fron eu,lnence while
speaking And II q good part Of his congregation Is
seated above him. be is not Likely to look downward
SO much.
Honor to whom Honor -walter-Everythins salts
factory. saht
"Tned to get everything right, sab"
"This IL as well a cooked meal as ! ever tasted
yes sab, thought IL would be- sab. Didn't Know
but maybe you might like to offer small fee, san
~ really think 1t would BIO deserved"
4Well send in tho cook."tomaha World
"The Hamilton Literary Monthly" published os
the senior class Of Hamilton College offers prize OF
500 tho writer Of the best essay on the subece
"The Conservatism Of American Institutions" Each
essay must be signed by fictitious name and mus
not be longer than 1000 words. All competition
must be regular subscribers Of The Monthly" and
must send In their essays before January go. lssa
Tho judges viii Do Senator Hawley. f. d. Elliot
Ph-D., VI Washington. aud Con yressman James b
sherman. Of Utica, n Y.
"wen, Smith, I'm glad 10 500 you out at lass
You've had awful long pnn Of II, haven't YOU.
Yes, that's %, and Ira grateful enough 70 tnHs
MEDICAL congress In Washlngto fr giving me iHs
Medical oonressf Why, yuu havent been v
"No, hut my doctor has been down there for nesny
. week. and I'm feoling frstrata -Sprngfeld oh"A
Thirty years ego great many pcachc. were grown
In Connecticut But with the advent OF the railrva"
their culture almost ceased owing ~ the ease sns
cheapnsss with which they coula DO brought no~
Delaware During tho last few year,, however, CON
siderable attention has been paid to this fruit oy con
uecticat farmers, end the crop this year 10 e'um'As
q 10000 basks0L
Memphs hss dsvissd ~ amusing ssAs ~. 1 -