The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1887-09-28
A Texan Lady's Odd Fancy-Some
Of the Conceits Of the Con.
tributors to the
Collection.

80 muCQ LOT the alDum. lue SHasIiy
trinket is regularly sprung upon the
young lady's friends, with the request
that they write something appropriate
upon it. The surface is smooth as glass,
and little manipulation of an India-ink
bottle and photographic pen does the
work. The frontal regions are pretty
well covered now and the rear expansc is
left for the back counties not yet heard
from. Some of the inscriptions are
worthy of chronicle. Between the eyes
is this verse:
Where is the patter?
Where is the clatterl
Where the gray matter,
The yitalized spark!
Science erra'ic,
Religion dogmatic
Are both quite emphatic
And both in the dark.
Behind this disgruntled observer OF
human nature has penled:
You mind me of Macchiavelli-
A great head and no backbone.
A sentimentalist leaves his tribute in q
line above the ear, or rather where tho
ear was:
A she'll from which
The pearl is gone
Something in the same vein is another
inscription not far away:
Empty scabbard: where's
Thy sword.
Directly beneath this another hand has
penned the terse rejoinder:
It has scared.
On the broad, level space on top, as
free from bumps, vicious or intellectual,
as o billiard ball, are these two stanzas:
Do the thoughts fond, foolish, wise,
That ran wild once in your brain,
Ever come in spectral guise,
And hold revel there again9
Do they whisper, soft and low,
Through the empty chamber here,
Songs you loved long, long ago,
Names you once held very dear7
Away over at one side somebody who
had evidently taken in the contour of the
skull expressed himself in the following
unkind proposition:
I'll wager there is more on the outside Of
your head than there ever was on the inside.
A famous oarsman who passed through
Texas not long ago on his way to the
Pacific coast, was led unwillingly up to
the depository and finally expressed him.
self thus:
have a weakness for sculls.
An old gentleman, who declared that
the skull never belonged to man, but
was once part of the effects of a senorita
aud had worn q mantilla many time,
placed this line above his autograph:
A chatter-bo1, minus the chatter.
A studious friend to whom the auto.
graph album was suggestive of Yorrick,
drew on the bard of Avon for his senti
ment and wrote:
Sans hair, sans eyes,
Sans teeth, sans everything.
It will be observed that he quoted ad
lib. Near this effort is reflection that
it probably suggested:
believe now that
beauty is only skin
deep.
The last one is in q cavity that mark.
where fine bump of veneration is turned
inside out, and is brief and to the point
A bone of contention.
sT have lots of fun with my SKULL
said the fair collector of signatures, fol
the Mexican has to her mind lost all pro
prietorship in it, "and use it to get rid
Of silly people who always write such
foolish things"
elbow do you do that2" asked one o.
her victims.
"Easy enough. You see have an
autograph album also, and produce
them both. A bright person prefers the
skull, because there is subject right
away. But, on the other hand, one Of
the sort who write: Last but not least,
and When this You see remember me,
get frightened and turn to the book with
an absolute sigh of relief. So in that
way 1 keep the skull tolerably seect.
Would you like to look at the book"
"Spare me-" said the unhappy man.