The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-09-26
BRIGHT BITS.

THE names of the members Of the new Bull
garian Cabinet are published, and they are COM
posed almost exclusively of consonants.-ProUt
delce Journal.
THE highest ambition of some people seems
to be to make themselves disagreeable, as for
instance, the man who asks You what time it is
when he knows you have your watch pawned.-
! Lincoln Journal
FLoRRlE.-No, dear, it was not an editor who
wrote that beautiful gem, beginning Come
read to me a poem Some simple and heartfelt
lay" We don't know tho wrote it, but it was
not an editor.-NashuiHe american.
ATENNEssEE 5-YEAR-oLD was taken by his
mother TO witness hop at hotel for the first
time in his Life. Noticing an elderly musician
playing on harp the youngster looked up into
his mothers face, saying, Mamma, is that
David?'
THERE is no sadder sight than to see fond
mother who has spent 5000 to fit out frecke
faced girl for the summer resorts during the
match making season, packing her daughters
dresses away in camphor and sprinkling the
finery with tears of disappointment Boston
Globe.
Mr.. WALDO Ito Miss Breezy)-Is there much
excitement in Chicago Miss Breezy, over the
BAG )n Shakespeare controversy
MISS Breezy-Oh, yes, great deal. We Chi
cago people, Mr.. Waldo of course. all think
that it was Bacon who wrote Shakespeare
| NeiC York sun.
THE convict lease system is a great question
| before the people of Georgia now" observed
| the Judge. I'm fact | may say it is the most
| important question"
Yes" replied the Major, "t's queer too that
| the lease question should become the greatest"
PtttSbng Chronicle Telegraph.
! "GooD GRACIOUS exclaimed lady visitor to
the sporting editors room, as, with terror in her
eyes, she made dart for the door; lis there
murder going on outsider"
BE calm, madame" said the sporting editor
with gentle smile, lit is nothing. 1t is only
the religious editor swearing over his proofs
Boston Courier.
He WANTED PRooF-Female: / s-s-see th-th-
that y-y-you adv-v-vertise f-f-for a SIS stutter
ing female.
Newspaper Clerk-Yes ma am.
Female--W- wwel, s-s-stutter.
Newspaper Clerk-Wel, ma am, can't take
your word for it; fill out this blank affidavit
piease-Iid- Bits.
BAGLEY-It is passing strange how so many
words get twisted from their original meaning
For instance, let" used to mean hinder"
Mrs. Bagley-I have a better example. "Col-
lect" used to mean ITO gather"
Bagley surprised That what it means now
Mrs. Bagley (poStivey)-No, it doesn't. Ask
the garbage collector. Philadelphia CAL.
FELLOW who is considered soft, speaking the
| other day of the many inventions which have
| been made by the present generation exultingy
| wound up with:
For my part, l believe every generation grows
| wiser; for there's my father, he knew'd more N
| my grandfather and believe know more than
my father did.
| MY uetf SIT, remarked a DyStander, what
fool your grandfather must have BEEN
! Peorio Transcript,
| A PASSENGER got off the sleeper the other
| night. entered the restaurant, clutched chick
| en- and began eating. After throwing down a
| bill to settle for it he said. Raise chickens
| herey'
| Sleepy attendant Yes; drummers ministers
| and railroad men forty cents: farmers and
| country trading people sixty cents; dude and
| pleasure tourists from sixty cents upward.
The customer settled under the Acc. classifi
! cation.-SdrdtOgidn.