The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1887-09-29
4 TEXAS LIAR.
a Lone Star 0lOd-Hopper Breaks the Re-
cord as q LiVid Liar.
To The CITIzE

To The CITIZEN.
A man was driving through the
country IN q Central Texas county |
and got into conversation with a
settler who was sitting in front Of
his house.
"You have g fine farm hereF" he |
said to the settler.
"Best in the country, stranger"
"Do you raise big crops?"
"CropsP
Big crops-yes, sir?"
"Well, | calculate / do"
"The soil is- very rich here 1 sup
poser
THAT don't express it; rich don't
do it justice. This soil is perfect
absolutely perfect-bes5 in the
world. 1t is deep as well, mel
low as an ash heap, rich as gold;
yes, sir, no other soil in the world
will compare at all with it."
Il am glad to hear it,"
"Ssy, stranger" continued the
settler, strengthening up, "did you
hear that kinder holler poundin'
soundP'
The man admitted that he didn't
know but he could hear something
Yes" continued the settler,
'kinder boomin' sound like an emp
ty bar'l with an Old rubber boot?'
Yes, what is it?'
Stranger, that's my pumpkins
bein' yanked along cross the ground
so fast they bounce up in the air
every once an while"
Your pumpkins! What is draw
ing them at that rateY
The vines, stranger, the vines
They are growing SO fast you see
We have to take fast horse and
lasso them when We gather them
They will be bout wore out. l have
to admit this is q poor place for
pumpkins an squashes. See that
little knoll over there bout hun
dred yards cross it an twenty fee,
high?"
THAT one down there with
bushy tree growing on top of it?'
Eyes, but it amt no tree, it's
beet top"
'NVhy did you plant it or top Of
the knoli?''
Il did not, stranger, that ground
was perfectly level when I planted
it there. Beet so big it has kinder
raised the ground up sll round il
and made a knoll. l planted one
next to my house the first year and
it holsted it up and pretty Near tip
ped it over"
Isn't the season a little dry fol
themf"
They go down to water, stran-
ger; that well there is the hole tbs
beet come out OF. ! had a crab ap
| pie tree near the house the SAME
year and the apples grew SO big
they busted and broke all my win
ders. Want to hear how We husk
coro?"
81 will try and stand it,"
eve chop of an ear an let it fail
On the ground and then husk it with
= team-hitch onto the end of 6
husk an drive longside of the ear
au' peal it of and then go back after
smother"
"Slow job"
Eyes, but then there is twenty
bushels of corn when we ge
through. ] was out looking at my
wheat yesterday and d head of it
struck me on the shoulder and pref
! ty near broke my collar bone. !
have to have gas pipa for my beans
70 climb; they are so strong and
squeeze 50 tight that they cut
wooden pole in two in q dozen
places"
Eyes"
"There was q big rock down OF
the back end OF ny pIace bout ten
feet each way and it stuck down in
TO the ground bout feet. l laid Q
| raddish seed on the middle Of 1t an
the seed sorter smelt the remarkable
rich soil down under the rock as
might say an it begun to grow on
down. She went sharp end first OF
course and it split the rock in TWEEN
ty pieces and / drawd it of"
yes"
81 might tell you Of lots of other
things If l had a mind TO-"
81 don't doubt it. Bu5 see here
| are you telling me all these infer
nal lies because you want to sell
yozr farmT
ooh no, sit; I've juet told you the
Is1aI thing. l don't want to sell;
| just do 1t Cor the good of the
country. There is some thst want
to sell you zee an we all sorter
pull together-always do in a new
country, you know. The story don't
hurt me none an lots of you darned
fools from the east believe it. !
reckon though that you have tray
eled. Goodbye. Stop if you
should be going past again"
Texas HUNTER.
| ----------ss s--
The Roman soldiers who buils
such wonderful roads and carried
weight OF armor and luggage that
would crush the average farm hand,