The Mankato free press. [volume] (Mankato, Blue Earth County, Minn.) 1879-1924, 1887-03-25
AMONG THE BOOKS.
LaughabIe Experiences OF Clerks In the
Bookstores.


ave have some queer orders occa-
sionally," said clerk in one of the
largest book houses i'm Boston the 9TH
er day, ''and if could remember half
that happen in any year it would make
laughable story for the Herald. Here
is a man, for instance, who wrote us
to send him the price of hundred
books of about $50 pages each. Can
you conceive anything more ambiguousp
1t reminds me of lady of the shoddy
aristocracy who ordered bookcase
filled by dealer. her only stipulation
being that the books must be of uni
form size and bound in blue covers.
We had an order last month from a
gentleman on the frontier to send
books to eight of his friends, whose adj
dresses he gave, the volumes to cost IS
each. As we did not know his friends
it is possible that we made some incon-
gruous selections.
at is common for us tn receive d.
rections by mail about Christmas-time
like this: Send me book costing
about 81 which would be suitable for
my husband Not knowing whether
the husband is clergyman or a faro
banker it is rather hard to decide what
would be suitable" for him. We
usually select some work of high moral
tone, To be on the safe side, but very
likely the man would prefer "Schneck
on Poker or one of Iola's works if he
had his choice. Sometimes people
write: Send me the latest thing YOU
have, leaving us i'm the dark whether
to forward book of poems, Il novel,
or a volume of sermons. Some of our
customers have the autograph rage.
One of them wrote little while ago
asking if we would please get Mr..
Owen Meredith to send his name i'm his
own handwriting. This customer
seemed to think that the late Lord
Lieutenant of India and Earl i'm the
English Peerage was i'm the habit of
dropping into our store once or twice a
day.
Book buyers often get a wrong
idea of work from its title, as in the
case of several agricultlrists who have
sent to us for .Sheep-folds,' under the
impression that it relates to the COM
panions of the small animal that Mary
allowed to follow her, to the academy,
when in reality it is work on church
architecture. A shOemaker's wife pur-
chased Ruskin's celebrated work on
political economy entitled Unto This
Last thinking it had something to do
with the boot business, and returned il
Disguised on asccrtaining her error.
A man who was told to buy a copy of
.EnOch Arden asked for In Garden
We happened to have horticultural
work of the latter name and he took
it, but the person who sent him came
to make the change and that is how
we learned of his messengers mistake
Titles are often very misleading. We
recently had a pamphlet called Letters
from HE'LL and orders fairly poured in
from orthodox societies, they suppos-
ing that it was an indOrsement Of the
fire and birthstone theory. But the
author, who was pronounced liberal,
took skeptical ground, and it is proba-
BILE that each of those societies had a
package ready for the junk man the
next time he called. Many people have
bought Joseph Cooks sermons think
ing that they were discourscs on the
culinary art; and u recent number of
our trade paper contained an account
of an occurrence in Cleveland where
farmer bought Cooks Synopsis of
Chess Openings under the impression
that it contained recipes for making
table delicacies. 1t is no joke, but a
solemn fact, that a teamster dropped in
one day to ask whether we would re-
commend Goldsmith $ Greece for
wagon axles. He had seen it adver-
tised. -- --- .--- -
"a lady whote for a copy of Agnes
of Toronto tliakin@ probably, that
Mrs. Stoves heroine was a girl who
wore snowshoes and rode down tobog-
gan slides. Another wrote: i see in
your catalogue that you have Fern
Leaves Please write nfe the price of
the leaves by the hundred, and wheth-
er you make any discount to Sunday
schools; we wish them to trim our
vestry.' A lady who evidently wished
for Nathaniel Hawthorne's Grand
fathers Chair asked us the other day,
Have you 'Grandfather's Clock by
Daniel Hawthorne?' There are two or
three chestnuts that you might work
in, which are always funny. That one
about the country library list which
announced mill on Political Economy,
ditto on the Floss, is too good to die.
Elderly gentlemen never tire of dis
cussing the relative merits of Worces-
ter and Webster, as it gives them
chance to wind up with, We'll, l al
ways voted for Daniel and go in for
him every time l believe that the
story about the man who asked for
Webster on Il Bridge is gospel truth.
about April l our new boys catch
it from practical jokers. They are
sent hunting for such well-known
works as Buckle on Straps HEM on
Laying Bacon on the Pig etc. /
suppose you have heard of the fellow
who surprised his French friend by
bringing him book in the Gallie
language which he had picked up at a
sale, Something about Cannibals,' he
explained. 1t was Paul ct Virginie.'
Early in the holidays boy and his
mother-som.times l should say a
mother and her son, but this was boy
and his mothcr-werc looking over the
stock on our counters. Here is what
Charlie wants. cried the lad. You
know he is crazy over wild animal
Stories Ibid up the book for them.
1t was 'MOntcalm and Wolfe"
The clerks in music stores often have
laughable experiences. A young lady
walked into one of the largest on
Washington street and said, or seemed
to say, Il want Willie Nye." A boy
was sent to scour for William, and
when that young gentleman presented
himself it would be hard to say wheth-
er he or the girl looked the more as
tonished. "Di,t you ask for Will NyeP"
he said. Certainly not" she replied.
Il want that new song, viii and /.
An entirely new clerk ut another store
came near fainting several times dur
ing his first day behind the counter,
He had hardly taken his position when
4 young lady with blonde tresses and
eyes which seemed made of bits of
Italian sky walked up to the counter.
Fixing her orbs upon him, she said,
kiss Me, Darling, Ere You Co."
They had to take him out and place
him under the faucet, while another
clerk gave the customer the piece of
music she desired. He had hardly re-
covered enough to resume his place,
when a maiden of perhaps 20 winters
remarked to him: "Ah! Would that /