Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1887-09-29
WOMAN'S DEPARTMENT.
TOM AND CONSCIENCE.

Oots - Usual th0 AoteoE WINS suo mr.
gumsne
Lots of women know Tom, and the
story of his little confab with Con-
science will be sufficient introduction
to the rest
He was a man of average intelli-
gence, as also of average stupidity,
having often convinced himself that
God made woman with nothing in her
hand but the dish-cloth and the duster,
while under man arm, at his making.
He tucked the ballot-box. the jug and
the tobacco-box. as the source of manly
government for two sexes.
Well. one day he sat in his tip-back
chair reading his favorite daily. when
a report of woman-suffrage conven-
ton ran under his eye and set him to
making homemade editorials.
'.Now. there's wife," quoth Tom to
Tom; ''she's uncommon smart at all
she ever tried (wOuldn't thrash the
fellow that said she wasn'D; but.
pshaw! what's she know bout tariff
on wool, civil service. bogus butter,
an plooro-newmoney. eh?"
Then he chuckled to himself in the
1ooking-glass opposite. and was about
to resume his paper, when Conscience
glanced up into his face and whispered,
with a smile:
'Tom. dear, all people are dull
touching things they never rubbed
against. You run your saw-mill we'll;
but you couldn't run cotton-mill,
nor bake batch of bread like Lucy's;
and when she has hand in the loaf of
State Government, she'll study to
mould that, too. light and sweet, and
do it to a turn in the Oven of public
service"
MAY be so, Conscience; but. bless
me! she studies up thing 'nough now l
wish she didn't-nO need O. missions
an temperance, night-schools and
tinkerin' for the poor. I'd jest like to
have one field left she didn't take in
uerest 'nough in to watch me-"
"Ah. Tom! now you're honest; for
the voting women certainly will know
more Of mems political conduct, and
excuse less. So. too. Lucy. you say,
now thinks and labors for others, also;
but still she's a good housekeeper,
isn't she?"
IS Yes, ma'am! best in town, cause
she don't vote. If she votes, the
doughnuts'll all turn into books an
thoughts on reforming every body. an
she'll come to respect herself for all
she's worth; then other folks will, too.
Why. she might get to be head O. the
family. l tell you. woman should be
kept tumble like, as in parts O. France
she has to get married in mournin';
an that showed a model wife-that
old London sign-board as had painted
on it female figger without a head,
an marked The Good Woman"
Yes Tom." said Conscience,
"in those days men were
ibrutes."
''Say. Conscience. keep still. can't
you! Woman was made to fry fish for
man; be his SEWN machine, too; and
when she's out O apple dumplin's. she's
outen her sphere. She's good 'nough
for me rs she be-"
Tom, man, you need her the very
best she can be-"
"Well. well, well! Somehow l feel
1T in my bones as suffrage is a-comin'
10 her. I'm 'fraid. too. Lucy won't vote
my way every time. cause she pious.
like lots on 'em. They'll vote pious.
too. reckon; an then, oh. dear me!
poor Tom'll lose his tansy bitters. No.
ma'am, Miss Conscience; l guess I'm
for keepin' suffrage in the masculine
gender"
just once more. and thoughtfully in
earnest. good Conscience beamed up
into his face and said:
Beloved Tom. I'm your best friend;
kindly and carefully hear me As you
say. woman is pions; her nature looks
upward as tar rs nature God. and the
more it lays hand upon all that is true
and helpful, the more womanly wife
and inspiring mother she'll be.
Woman never can become bad wife
and mother through leave to make the
State guardian of the treasures dearest
to wife and mother. Wouldn't you feel
disgraced. Tom. if disfranchiscd? And
don't your bright wife and daughter
feel it as keenly? You know you never
grew SO fast as the morning you
awoke twenty-one. But Lucy'll vote
away your bitters,' you say. So she
will; but think how the loss of your Bit
tiers will sweeten the life of You both
She'll not, though. vote away your APP
pie dumplings; she'll only vote the
peaceful flavor of her home into all the
country. and then all the country will
respect her home. Indeed. Tom. if
you'll vote as tell you. Lucy'll always
vote with you; and if she be half rs re-
ligious rs you say. will not her vote
cleanse the filthy pool of politics?' Or
do you fear Lucy'll be sciled? Men and