Bridgeton pioneer. (Bridgeton, N.J.) 1884-1919, 1887-02-10
HOW I CAME TO GET MARRIED.
BowENToWN X ROADS,
Feb. 9th, 1887.

Feb. 9th, 1887.
1t may be funny, but I've got a rib
and baby.
Shadows departed - oyster stews,
brandy julips cigar boxes, boot jacks
shirt buttons, whist and
dominoes. Shadows present-Hoop
skirts, band boxes, CATERS, long stock
ings, little willow chairs, cradles, para
goric, hive syrup, etc. I'll just tell
you how | caught it.
was always the darndest, tea Gus
tard bashful fellow you ever did see; it
was kinder in my line to be taken with
the shakes every time saw gal ap
preaching, and I'd cross the street any
time rather than meet one; not because
didn't like the critters, for if [ was
behind fence, looking through knot
hole, 1 could not look at one long
enough.
Well, my sister Libby gave party
one night. l strayed away from home
because I was too bashful to face the
music | hung around the house,
whistling ''Old Dan Tucker dancing
to keep my feet warm, and watching
the heads bob up and down behind
the curtain, and wishing the thunder
ing party would break up, so that |
could 90 to bed l smoked bunch of
cigars and it was getting late and very
uncomfortable / concluded l would
climb up the door-post; no sooner said
than done, and | was soon snugly in
bed. Now says I, let her rip. Dance
until your wind gives out and, cud-
ding under the quilt, Morpheus
grasped me- 1 was dreaming of soft
shelled crabs, stewed tripe, and having
a good time, when some one knocked
at my door, and walked me up. l lay
low. Rap, rap, rap! Then l heard a
whispering, and | knew there was a
whole raft of girls outside.
Rap, rapl
Then | heard a voice very much like
sister Lib's say, Jack, are you in
there?''
Eyes, am
Then came a roar of laughter.
LET us inr
Il won't. Can't you let a fellow
alone?n
Are you abed?'
Eyes, l am."
''Get up!'
Il won't"
Then came another laugh. By thun-
der | began to get riled. Get out,
you petticoated scare-crows. Can't
you get beau without hauling fel-
low out of bed? l won't go home with
you, so you may clear out" Then,
throwing my boots at the door, l felt
relieved. But presently, oh, moral
buttons! Sister Lib sang out, Jack,
you'll have to get up; all the girls
things are in there.
Misery, what pickle! Think of me
in bed. all covered with shawls, muffs,
bonnets and cloaks; and twenty girls
outside waiting for them. Had l
stopped to think, l should have faint
ed. As it was, rolled out among the
bonnet wire and ribbon in hurry.
Smash went the millinery in every
direction. had to dress in the dark
for there was crack in the door
and the way l tumbled about was
death to straw hats"
opened the door and found myself
right among the girls. "Oh, my Leg
horn cries one; My dear darling vel
vet,n and they pitched in. They pulled
me this way and that, boxed my ears,
and one bright-eyed little piece-Sal
her name was-put her arms around
my neck and kissed me on the lips.
Human nature could not stand that,
and gave her as good as she sent. 1t
was the first time l had ever had a
taste, and it was powerful good. be
lieve could have kissed that gal from
julius Caesar to the Fourth of July.
"Jack," says she I'VE are sorry to
disturb you, but won't you see me
home - "Yes, 1 will" says l. And
did, too, and had another smack at the
gate.
After that we took to turtle doving,
and both of us signing like barrel OF
cider when we were away from each
other.
Twas at the close of a glorious Sum
mer day. The sun was setting behind
a distant hog pen, the chickens were
going to roost, the oull frogs were com
mencing their evening song, the polly
wogs in their native mud puddles pre-
pairing themselves for the shades OF
night. When Sal and myself sat on an
antiquated black log, listening to the
music of nature, such as tree toads,
grunting pigs, and roosters, which was
wafted TO our ears bV the gentle