The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1887-12-11

A Hotel Home Tor wrecked Dra1n- workers Is
about to be established in New York. ergo the
chestnut-vender and the decayed punster may
pack their carpet'bags.
Prince William suffers with his sore throat,
no doubt. but those pangs are light compared
with what he would suffer could he see the
wood cuts of himself which now illuminate rural
journalism in the United States
Brussels is to have theater without foot
lights. 1t is to be hoped this innovation will
not become universal, as it will certainly cast a
gloom over the main attractions of the modern
drama
Dow Mister a Maryland man, was recently
tried for murder and acquitted. Public senti-
ment in that region, however, ought to demand
that he receive some punishment for obstinately
wearing his name hind side before.
Rider Haggard's new story, "a Tale of Three
Lions" does not bear title entirely satisfying
to this spectacular novelist's patrons. If it had
been IA Lion with Three Tails" or "Three
Lions with One Tail" now, there would be no
cause for complaint.
Why should it excite surprise that a tree can
be cut down. made into paper and turned out
as newspaper in thirty-sx hours7 Rapid work
it must be admitted but when science in
duce bales of waste basket poetry to climb back
into the similitude and likeness of tree, it will
be time enough to exclaim-
The English have finally gotten around to dis
cussing the Donelly- Shakespeare acon-cipher.
1t behooves them to move deliberately and dis
creetly towards decision in this matter, for if
it be ultimately settled by them that the divine
William not the author of his own works
the question will then arise, ''and what is STRAIT
ford on -AvonF
Ella Wheeler Wilcox believes in prenatal in
fuence, and attributes her poetic tendencies to
her mothers devotion to Lalla Rookh before
her birth. Judging from the fervent character
of Elias poetry. the inference is that tire senior
madam must have fed on livelier verse than
Tom Moore-Byron for instance.
Beautiful smile from 'Mr. Barnes of New
York"-a novel just in its iftieth thousand
edwin stands waiting, for n wv that he knows
his sweetheart loves him he is like lion that
has tasted blood and thirsts for more" In the
light of this intense excitement the lover who
cannot paw up the bricks and roar must make
an assignment and go out of business.
Maurice Thompson says in late number of
the American Magazine: 'Talle ont of Byron's
poetry all the immortality and al the bombast
and what you will have left viii be scarcely worth
keeping as the proof that there was once great
poet" 1t is evident that in writing this criti-
cism the author momentarily overlooked 1.-THE
Isles of Greece" 1.-THE Destruction of SIENNA
cherib," ard few other like trifes from Byron's
pen.
The modern clergyman is an obliging creature.
but he ought to draw line somewhere. 1t is
all very well for him to sign soap advertisements
or cough medicine certifcates-that is in the
line of his business, cleanliness being next to
goodness, and the minister's throat part of his
stock in trade-but he cannot tangle himself up
with 'Sure Cure for Corns. Warts and Bun
ionsn without corresponding loss of dignity. If
his right foot has any of these plebeian excres-
cences he ought not to let even his left foot
know it. much less bring the fact to the world
1t is to be hoped that the wave of innovation
as to funerals which has recently manifested
itself will not be widespread in its depredatons.
Death brings with it too real grief TO be ale
waited by any attempt to counterfeit life in
ranging the form of the one whose soul has
flown, lounge, if only asleep With
equal comforting and CHASTITY effect dead body
might as well be propped up in chair. as if
reading or knitting. Let no such ludicrous
tifcial efforts mar the dignity of dread pres
ence which is only too slowly realized The
suggestion as to leaving cards in basket to be
placed on the footboard of the casket, for the
benefit of the family who are supposed to be too
deeply immersed in Grape to be taking notes
to the attendance, caps the climax of absurdity.
Why not appoint remotely bereaved relative
for the same purposel Truly the mind of
evolves queer things.
It is only the occasional humor connected
with casualties which keeps such items from
drear monotony; such as the account of man
who went out cunning and returned with his game
bag full of his own thumbs and fingers; that
other victim who lately walked new
court house, and had his plaster-cast hastily
taken by bucket of fresh mortar which fell
from above and, striking squarely on his head.
enveloped him completely and almostsmothered
him. In the same line comes the account of two
young men. in the South somewhere, who were
seated talking, of them trifing with an
empty pistol The other young had a boil
on his chin, and pointing it playfully in the air.
he said ''Shoot the boil" His friend. equally
playful, complied. and the empty pistol, efficient
as ever, not only shot away the boil, but part of
the cheek and jaw of its owner. At latest ac-
counts, the two young fellows were trying to
strike a general average to establishment.