Telegram-herald., 1887-07-31
CANT hooks MAYOR
souNAN sNooksa wRlTEs N $50.
fhs E@sait ct sisttlns GrAsd h@Pids-
1saz< A4dls. Who laughed @t
Ersksn-up Eoli worn Aaa-hIs
EukgF kUn IA.

CANr HooE CoENERs July =. lssl.-As
nssyor of ihis Aule city lesl IL nay dGiy 10
occasionally visit Graad Rapids for The
purpose of picking up poinGcrs regarding
Government pu0.e Improvements, eic.
Your clty has got name throughout the
surrounding country OF being one Of the
mos. moral places in the West, outside Of
Chicago.
Ia The matter OF public Improvements
z's0. yoa stand high. and you certainly
have about a. much room for Improvement
A. any place know Of
write this IN bed. on account Of my
f0olisnness in undertaking 10 drive out TO
nv 1so.her-in-laws placs On South
D.,l..on-st while there. got
along al right until arrived
st q p ace where the street was about ten
feet wide where i me. car. two grocery
wagons aud milk wagon. They seemed
70 nave the rish. OF way, So turned about
ug running over piie of blocks and an old
pipe. only breaking the buggy IN one place.
AsnGed it with one of my suspenders
aud started IN again. THIS trip proceeded
hsif = biOct, only running into one stone
pie and a derrick, when met a beer wagon.
loaded ior bear, followed by BAKER )
wagon.
Driver hollered out: Turn around there
OIL NaD. Do ROOM 10 pass.
Csu't' saws !, lust broke my buggy
Turning around back here. You turn
around"
.Eot ~ blank blank sight I won't.
hsvs oecl. irving tor three hours 10 get
sOme beer 90 r. saloon down here. and l am
going O. ge there this time or bEst.'
Well 1 viii Try 10 pass you then, for ]
vouid really Ike 70 got - my bsOther-in-
Law t.ue tor supper.
- / backed ND over line of iron pipe
into a c.fc1 and then ahead ! went over
o ne wooden pipe that would scale 500
nee, to the cut. essy. The horse got ovsr
sl r rat out tie cOnijundec vehicle upset,
pitching ne head fTsy over morse block.
pretty near breaking my left arm and
Wloiy busting my remaining suspenGer.
~ holdiag up nv pants Dv hand, | man
Azel 90 get across biz ditch and Over q
bank o. dirt SIX feet high TO a drug store,
fUr rrDaiFs
Druggist was terrible tickled to see me.
Sad he had been III hopes al day that a
customer would cali before night. How
dll Won get mere anyhow said he.
Ob. I tgnbled IN over y dirt pile. |
want some aTnica TO pat on my arm.
While be was putting on the arnlca /
SAYS "how IS business"
"Hsi.i1sss' Done mention IL. How can
We go pusiues, with haif "a mile of street
torn up . week OK SO before Ike pipes are
lalat
just then boy came IN, saying: Say,
mister, he cop bas run your rig in"
out ] ran, aud 80 help me Bob, a police
man had rishted my buggy and drove II to
headquarters where had TO follow aud
pay dollar 20 gci il.
Then went to Sweets Tavern for sup
per.
When my brother-in-law sees this be
will know why did not visit him.
] would gently hins TO those three young
ladies that laughed at q toil-wOrn man
going Dy with his plug hat stove in on one
SIDE and franiicly trying To catch up with a
policeman, driving 4 bay mare with a
SPOKE broke on the of side and holding his
unmsnuona5les mp with his remaining
arm that they are liable to thus poke fun at
eminent public officials from abroad.
lours brokeHly
SOLfMAN cSoOgs
Mayor OF Cant Hook Corners.
To dream Of ponGercus whale,
Erect or ihe tip ol his tale,
Us the sgn cf q storm
.lffbe weather is warm
Unless IL should hapuen 10 fail
Dreams don amount 20 much anyhow.
Some s'ers however. are iufal BILE II
vou afe c0nStiDated. with no appetite tor.
i1ree with sick headache sni bilious syn
iaTlf fnese sTus indicate taa- you need
Vr. Piercrs Pleasant Purgative Peile.s.
they VII cure you. All druggists.