The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1887-07-10
BRIGHT BITS.


If ever you noted four suffering mon
Us four tramps is them.
If ever four objects your purse should open
Us four trampS is them.
We've had nothing to eat since we cannot tell
And we haven't prospect of dining again;
Oh, If ever men needed meal now and then
Us four trampS is them.
If ever men travelled through muck and through
Us four tramps is them.
If ever men wore most wretChed attire
Us four tramps is them.
There's not the least thing about us to admire,
Our beauty is not of the kind to inspire;
Oh, if ever four men We're in misery dire
Us four tramps is them.
Now if ever you hear of four men Of good
Us four tramps is them.
Or if you hear of four poor broken hearts
Us four tramps is them.
So don't be deceived by each story that starts,
Let nobody fool you with wiles and with arts;
Remember just this, we have no counterpartS-
Us four tramps is them
Charleston Enterprise.
THE difference between a poor base ball
player and black measles is that one strikes out
and the other strikes in.-PbttGdetphid Call.
wINKs-I can't see with these glasses.
Optican-Ahl ali! No. 2s! You are very
nearsighted, sir. Try No is.
Winks-Yes, No. suits me exactly l. can see
beautifully; But say, what can do when
fail to see through No. 1?
Optician- Youth have to get poodle, sir
To1Cn Topics,
SPECTATOR ENTHUSIASTICALLY tell you,
gentlemen, there is wealth in the Great Argent
mining country. Rock fairly glistens with
silver.
Returned Miner-I can testify to that. There
is q fortune there, gentlemen.
Speculator-Have you been prospecting in
that locality?
Returned Miner-Yes: Just come back left
my fortune there.-BiR ghdmpt0n Republican.
LITTLE HELEN year-od cut her thumb; she
kept very quiet about it until it began to bleed,
then she screamed. so mamma, mamma! come
quick, the gravys all a running outr'-Our
little Walter manufactures the most convenient
participates for the occasion, whenever an uncer-
tain verb gets in his way. This morning he
was obliged to pick up a large number of but
tons which he had carelessly upset from their
basket. and after the task was done he jumped
up and said cheerfully: Papa, now I've got 'em
all puck up!''-"High Chair Philosophy" in
BGbyhOod.
lot-selling picnic)-Now, gentlemen, we are on
the ground, and you can't any of you get away
until the train goes.
Crowd-Dont want to.
And the train don't leave until SUNSET"
"Who careSy"
81 suppose you heard the brass band brought
along playing little on the trainT'
lGroanS and misses
s'Now, gentlemen, the sale will start up and
all I've got to say is you've got TO bid lively or
I'll start that band to playing again" Omaha
| World.
The writer, while waiting in the office of the
| Associated Bureau of Charities in London, took
up large volume containing the proceedings of
| the Social Science Convention. In the list of
corresponding members he read, David Dud-
ley Field Rhode Island, n. Y" Calling the at
tention of the society to it, he said:
Here is an error"
With blank look the Secretary said, "Oh,
| yesn'
He was then Informed that Rhode Island was
not part of New York.
No" said he but it was placed there be-
cause il was next to New York"
On being told that the important State of
Connecticut separated the two, he had nothing
further to say Christian Advocate