The Eaton Democrat. (Eaton, Ohio) 1875-1903, 1887-01-27
MR.. AND MRS. sowsER.
4 Patient and Hopeful Wlfc's sunday
Morning Trials and Tribulations.

incurred of Mr.. Bowser the other
night as we were closing up
The house and getting ready for bed.
"Shall we?" he echoed, as he stopped
pulling off one of his boots to look up.
i.AIrs. Bowser, you seem to be drifting
into heathenism! Of course we'll go
to church. 1t is our duty to set the
world an example" +
..But it's such job for you to get
ready, you knowe" -.
~ don't know any thing Of the kind!
II can't get ready three times to your
once, and with one-tenth the fuss, I'll |
90 off and kick myself to death! While
am not a so-called Christian. Mrs.
Bowser, 1 propose to respect the Lords
day by going to church. and propose
you'll do the same"
"Oh, l intended to CO."
"Oh, you did! And perhaps you
we're expecting me to stay home and
saw wood or play poker!"
We have breakfast at eight o'clock
Sunday mornings. At half-past seven
was up, and I called to Mr.. Bowser,
who lay ON the broad of his back with
his hands locked under the back of his
neck.
"Y-e-sy" he groaned.
Five minutes later I called him
again.
'Y-e-sr'
"Mr. Bowser, it's quarter to eight.
Cant you let feller sleepP'
But you are going to church"
At sharp eight got him out of bed,
but it was half-past before we sat down
to breakfast, and nine o'clock before
we got up. Then he went off to dress,
but it wasn't five minutes before he
| shouted:
"Mrs. Bowser, where's my shirtp"
..Why, in your bureau drawer, of
course"
..There isn't a single internal shirt
there! I'll bet a hundred dollars the
laundry hasn't come up"
| Invent upstairs and pulled out the
drawer, and there lay six clean shirts.
..Why didn't you say in the top
drawer?" he growled. and went down
stairs to hear him, three minutes later.
calling to me:
"Mrs. Bowser, have l got a pair OF
pantaloons in this houseP"
.sOf course you have. Your Sunday
J pantaloons are in the closet. !"
Il mo, they amt! I've looked the
} blasted house from top to bottom, and
they amt to be foundr'
went up and showed them to him,
hanging right before his eyes. At the
! same time got him collar, laid out
, his cuffs and necktie, and put his coat
, and vest on chair. l got ten minutes
, rest before he beloved over the banis
ter:
.Mrs. Bowser, if was a wife ane
mother and housekeeper I'd pay some
attention to my husbands wardrobe!
8 "What's wanted now?"
"This collar won't fit! You've gon,
I and let that swindling laundryist stea
}. all my collars and send me up old rag
D in the place of them!'
went up and showed him his owl
+ mark on every collar, and fitted one t
o his neck in half minute. l had go
e down and finished combing my hal
| Wu6n uc SuOucuiy uOoOAOO % w NV
I and followed it up with:
= "Mrs. Bowser, I've busted the bucki
6 of my vest!'
= "Well, you must pin the straps to
l. gether."
u "ru be hanged if I dop If you ha'
q looked my clothes over yesterday, as
a faithful wife would have done, thi
L could not have happenedP'
E, ran up and sewed the buckle or
S. and had just got down again when h
le called:
N "Did you tell the cook to black m
le bootsp"
'.Why, no.
g "Of course you didn't! That's jul
D. the kind of hair-pin you are! Ho'
re on earth this house has run SO long as
n has is mystery to me!'
t. carried his boots out to the cook an
ID promised her a new collar to shine thel
re up. By that time Mr.. Bowser can
y. downstairs.
a. ..Mrs. Bowser, look at those cuffs!
k. he exclaimed in terrible voice as
10 held them out to me.
S' wv nat s the IndGUeT!
oi "Matter! Why, I've broken both N
g. thumbs trying to get the buttons in
il. 'em! If you were like other wiv
ii you'd-''
nj 1 slipped the buttons in before
ry could finish the sentence, and then II
an to dress me. In about three minutes
Is, heard a terrible grunting and roarii
l's in the sitting-room. and Mr.. Bows
ay called:
lal by the living gum! but why was
er ever fool enough to marrye"
ia "What is it now?"
ch Here's hay on my plug hat-on 4
Ip- Sunday hat-a whole load of hay!'
ne "You were up in the barn loft t
I'd, other day when you had it on, remel
ng ber 1t will brush Off,
he "Oh! it will! Wen see if it do'
ra, I'll wear it just as it is, and let evel
'se body see what kind of wife I've got
,b- made three minutes further pre-
sc- ress toward dressing, when he shoute
tic ..Mrs Bowser, there goes the fl
! church bell! Are you readyp"
'uE "No."
"You amt! Then you'll stay hon
Idon't propose to go into church AT
the sermon has begun and make a sh'
hi. of myself! What on earth have y
ng been doing all morning"
in waiting on you"
.On me! Mrs. Bowser, don't q
Of falsehood to your other vices!
ich going-going alone"
He sailed off with benign look
lis his countenance, tenderly raised
hat to three or four ladies before
en- was out of sight, and saw by
paper the next day that he had 81
ith scribed $72 to help pay off the chul
debt.-DetroI Free Press.
Timidity That Wears OF.