The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1887-08-13
the Nun OkfOIS PRESS.

IHE HtnOHOJS PRESS.
EDITORIAL excursions are never de-
layed nor the members ever molested
by train robbers Fort Worth Ga
zotte.
THE market reports say that coffee
is getting strong. It hasn't been
noticed in boarding house circles vet,
- N. y. Star.
THIRTY robberies were committed in
one night in Wichita, Kansas. Which
it oughtn't to be the case Philadel-
phia News.
AT a Wagner concert. Forty peo-
pie arise to go out. Mrs. S. Ito fIiend)
Why dont't the rest 90 too? Friend
Can't; dead
THE reason so many Russians come
to America is because they leave only
a steppe mother country Duluth
Photographer.
A WoMAN's most eloquent speech is,
81 love you!" A mans is, Come
and take something, boyel I'll Fall
River Advance.
Now is the time of year when Loves
young dream gets jolted all out of
shape because the hammock let's CO.
Merchant Traveller
FOURTH Of July can hardly be called
the ladies day, although its principal
features are powder and bangs Josh
kosh Daily Northwestern.
CHICAGO lady Ito caller)-"Did you
know that Mrs. S. has obtained her
divorce?" Caller-"Oh, yes; we re
ceived cards yesterday. - Puck.
ALL Mexican troops have their
trousers gored at the hips. Sometimes
they also have them gored at the bull
fights which take place there Bill
Nye.
THE dealers in wheat caught in the
last collapse, claim it is a mistake to
say a market that rose by any other
name would smell as wheat Texas
Siftings.
IT IL said that small bills are scarce.
They certainly are with us. We
haven't had bill presented or months
but that was bigger than We wanted
to pay Boston Post.
A PATRIOT. First .born.-"I should
like to 90 abroad this summer, pop,
to see the world" Fond Parent-"I
do not object to your seeing the world
but do object sir, TO the world see
ing you Life.
WHATS the matter With your eyes,
JOe|" Been sitting ashes, Bill. The
winds against me, no matter how !
turn" 81 never get ashes in my eyes,
joe" ''How do you avoid it," 81
let my vie sift them"
THERE is a boy AT work il the spooI
factory at FOxcroft who should not
want for care in his younger days; he
has father and mother, stepfather
and stepmOther, all of whom are liV.
ing Dover Me- Observer.
Forest, Old fellow you
look melancholy" DeForest-"That's
lust the way | feel. My case is hope
less" Smyth-"AnybOdy trifljug
with your affections ?" DeForest-
Yes, my dreams are haunted every
night by r face | saw IN soap ad. y
New Haven News.
You've Mr. Sissy (indugjng in light
uncheon) "Ah, waiter, you may
bring me a Schweizer cheese sandwich,
with no butter, please, and a tritie Of
mustard; and, waiter, ler the cheese |
be fresh and thini" Waiter, defer
entialIyl Yes, sir: wonld you like
the holes cut out OF it az Puck.
A LITTLE Philadelphia GIL was
walking with her father on the banks
OF the raging SchuylkilI. ooh, father"
said she. Gust see how dirty the
water is" Yes" said her father,
sadly. "If it were not for the inherent
lmprobability ofthe thing, should say
that some Anarchist had been taking
bath. y SomerviIe Journal.
A DEAF gentleman entered 8 theater
while ballet was being performed |
After while the spectator began to
be tidgety in his seat and made use OF !
his hand as an ear trumpet. Tired of
this operation, be at last got up from
his seat and shouted at the top of his
voice: "Speak up-we can't hear q
word you say p Charivari.
A SON of the Emerald Isle meeting a
countryman whose face was not per
fectly remembered, after salutiDg him
most cordially, inquired his name. |
"Walsh," was the answer. walsh. |
Walsh" responded Paddy, "are We
not from Cork? | knew two old
maids there ofthat name. Was ayther
OF them yer mother ?''- PUCK.
Miss PSYCHE CRAM, (recent graduate
OF the Highpressure Seminary u see
by the papers that Gen. Paine has
disposed Of his Epig@a repens TO New
York parties. Harry Blunt-Epig@a
what? Oh yes, | see-vou mean the
Mayflower. Miss syche-May flower.
OF course! You don't know how an
noying it Is; but | never can think OF
the common names OF flowers"
81 ;" SEE said Mrs. Shuttle, THAT |
Edison has invented a method OF
whistling under water. | should like |
to know what good that's going to
do?" "Ah, you women don't under
stand these things replied Job, |
"whistling under water Can bemade OF
the greatest USE" "How, / should |
like to know" well, you see when |
man can whistle under water, he
that Is, he can-why, he can let folks
know when he Is drowning don't you
seer"
SrRANGER-"So that is your chief
cook, Ell? STRANGE He looks
healthy" Hotel man-"Heaithy He
hasn't lost day on account OF sick
ness for years" Remarkable, very
remarkabler' "Some people have an
lQed UBdU COOKS hIt Dig tdJeIS, ouG
this isn't so. That man eats scarcely
anything. Why, sir, about One-halt
the time he takes nothing but crack
ers and milk" "Ah! | see. he dOesn't
cook the crackers himself. > Omaha
World.
reriIous Postpouement.
To postpone, when the duty for immediate
action ia clear is always unwise. Especially
is it so when increasing ill-heaIth calls for