Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1887-07-22
THE NEW UMPIRE.

THE NEW UMPIRE.
If you have met Charley Munger lately
| you must have noticed how old and care
worn he is getting to be. He used to be
the brightest fellow in Trotterville and
popular, too, but lately nobody seems to
speak to him and there is little left of his
old geniality.
'tCharley,'' I said to him the other day,
"what is the matter with you?'
ooh, nothing" answered Charley de-
jectedly.
''Nonsense,'' replied, 'tthere is some
thing wrong. What is it? Anything l
can help you about?'
"Well,n he said with sigh, cit isn't
anything serious. The trouble, if it can
be called trouble, dates from the founda-
ton of the Trotterville Baseball club"
"Why, 1 thought you were active in
getting up the club"
$50 was; so I was It's good club,
too, but you see I don't play and am
the umpire and''-
II see how it is"
eyes, that's what's the matter. I don't
seem to be able to please anybody.
They're all down on me.'
''Look here, )" said, II know a fellow
in Detroit that used to be a league UNI
pire. Let me bring him over He is a
little fellow, but don't think they will
growl much at his decisions. -
Next day I met Bill Higgins and asked
him to come over to Trotterville and UNI
pire game, and I posted him on the kind
of Hckers the Trottervillians We're. Hig-
gins is an Englishman, who used to be
one Of the cowboys in Buffalo Bills Wild
West show, but, for some reason, Higgins
did not care to go back to England with
the company, and SO is out of job just
now. Bill used to do the fancy shooting
and some of the lasso exercises, and is
tough customer.
When we got to the Trotterville grounds
the game was in progress and Charley was
umpiring
cone strikep' he cried, as the ball came
over the plate.
''What's that you say?" cried the cap
tain of tie ms, as he marched up threat
eningly 20 the umpire.
II said a strike.''
''That wasn't no strike; the ball was
below the knee This statement was
loudly corroborated by the man at the
bat.
''Wel1, I thought it was strike" said
the umpire.
cit wasn't all the same" the ms were
unanimous in saying.
''All right Call it one ball Them
'What's that! what's thatI' yelled the
captain of the outs, as he marched from
the field.
ooh, come now, go on with the game"
said the bewildered umpire.
s'You said strike,'' shouted the out
ptain ttop6 NV Gonpcyn vo17 'ya tynt 10
stick to it''
Not if he was wrong, as he admits, :"
said the in captain.
3 "Wrong nothing It's a strike. He
said so. Hang such umpiring"
"See here" said the umpire, anxious
for peace, '1et's call that off and begin
again"
After some grurnbling this was agreed
to, and the game went on. The man at
the bat hit the ball and ran for the first
base. The ball was very cleverly stopped
by the second baseman and thrown to first,
ball and batsman getting there about the
same time. The umpire had run down to
first and stood there with indecision.
''Darn if I know which it is, " he said help
lessly. There was howl at this remark.
"He's outr' yelled the outs. "Safe! safeP'
shouted the ms, all gathering around the
first base. There was a wild wrangle be-
tween the two captains, and when they
turned to appeal to the umpire they found
that that individual had taken the oppor-
tunity to get over the fence and go home.
''This gentleman" said to the two
captains, twas umpire in the league last
summer. Perhaps he would see the game
through for you" They united in invit-
ing him to take the vacant post and he
consented. The new umpire threw off his
coat and unwound from his body a long,
thin rope which he flung on the ground.
Then he frightened his belt and said:
''Toss that ball here.'
The pitcher tossed the ball to him.
'"That balls 10 good" said the new
umpire
'sWhat's the matter with it?'' growled
one of the captains.
''Well, it's no good. That's what's the
matter with it,"
''Wel, we amt league club, and we
can't afford no dollar an @ half balls on
this ground" said the captain, somewhat
cowed by the resolute demeanor Of the
little umpire.
The umpire flung the ball into the air,
then putting his hand to his hip pulled out
a big revolver and fired as it came down.
The baseball flew into q dozen pieces.
IuCIG was IL Vi VI 1tI1CtLSLlcuU ttlllt Ills
may. They had no other ball. The UNI
pire went to where his coat was lying on
The ground, brought from the pocket
familiar red labeled box, tore it open,
took out a new ball and tossed it to the
pitcher.
'sThere," he said, ''I'll make you q pres
ent Of that one Now, then, play ball.
Up came the ball.
zone ballr'
Up it came again.
s'Two balls!''
'Three ballsn'
The pitcher took fresh hold on the
ball and rubbed it in the sand
''Four balls.'
Next time the ratified pitcher flung wide
Of the plate.
ssFive balls. Take your base''
The batSman dropped his club and
trotted down to first base. The captain
of the outs came marching towards the
umpire, mad clear through.
The umpire at once put his hand to his
hip and cried
'What are you coming out of the field
for, STRIP
oil want to speak to the pitcher,''
said the captain.
Gan right" said the umpire; ''be quick
about it,
They conversed for moment, then the
captain said II suppose I can change
pitchers?'
eyes, if you have another pitcher in the
field"
The pitcher was sent to center field and
the center man went into the box. He
pitched slow and curveless ball, but it
went over the plate every time.