davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

'.Forty-nine" has now on hand under
the personal inspiration and direction OF
Quinn, Mcguire, and Drury, a plan 70
form new labor party, and place all the
railroads and telegraph lines 10 the hands
of the government This interesting
triumvira,e not content with sacrificing
about slO,OOO,OOO in the recent strikes
to their selfish greed for power,
and making miserable the families
of thousands of workingmen who had
no cause of grievance are now engaged in
this new scheme which is the first step to-
wards the Utopia of socialism, a state OF al
fairs where no man can be rich or poor, but
everybody be under government control,
and the government directed by a party
of which the head of the Knights of La
bor is to be chief, and that head the pres
ent little satrap of 40" Well, let lis see
how long our free country will stand
this fallacy. In the first place
it is gross communism of the worst
type opposed to Democratic and Repub-
lcan principles, because 1t puts every
man and his affairs under despotic con-
troll and abrogates even the privilege OF
free thought In the second place it is
Numerically opposed to the American
idea of individual enterprise, for, when
the government owns everything and
puts every man in his place like a
piece Of machinery, the citizen is a
dummy and pawn to be used
according to the whims of such men
as Messrs. Mcguire, Quinn, and Drury.
The failure of the strikes because of the
innate rottenness of the 40 idea does not
deter these ambitious ignoramuses from
trying the part of Jack Cade and Wat
Tyler.
They are at heart Gf they have any the
worst aristocrats and tyrants on earth,
and have as little philanthropy as wis
dom. Their experiment will, in the end,
ruin thousands Of people, and finally
themselves But in the meantime, for
Heavens sake, let all sensible working
men exert themselves among their less
fortunate brethren, and show them the
nonsense as it is, and as we have tried to
explain it.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

The Sultan of Zanzibar is the unhap-
piest of monarchs, for be has an island
empire, any or all Of which can be bonn
barded by modern ordnance while his pal
ace can actually be held in pawn by any
little European power like Portugal that
takes fancy to demand some Of his ter
ritory, with the alternative Of his being
shelled in the midst of the magnificence
and luxury Of typical despot.
The Krupp gun is terrible enemy to
small nations, and the moral is, that no
community, not even commonwealth
of the United States, can depend on a
small force like the oyster-tug or the
First Regiment of Virginia to maintain
its rights.
When people have a sound, safe, free
government like ours in the control too
of the party Of popular rights, they should
take a pride in obeying its laws, for they
are, in fact, q part Of their political
existence.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22
ADVERTISING RATES.


To-day is always worthy OF serious
thought, if not a salute.
We commemorate the anniversary OF
the birth of one of the greatest men in
all the tide of time, essentially the great
est one of the modern era.
His craftsmanship after the close Of the
Revolution saved the country which his
sword has made, and no monument except
the growth of his own colossal figure
in history can fifty set forth his proper
tons.
Let Virginia this day remember that
her Washington moulded great coun-
try on principles of harmonious union
and not local prejudice, and that his own
grand patriotism was as broad as his
country can ever be.
Marshall has wisely kept the light full
on his constant devotion to the idea Of
the compact union Of the States, while
maintaining that much of States rights
as was harmonious with the practical
working of the Federal power.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

A proposition for free trade with Can
ada, the moment that Canada announces
its willingness to accept and reciprocste
the arrangement, is little surprising from
a prominent and influential Ohio man
like Mr.. Butterworth, who ought to be
religiously imbued to the bottom Of his
soul with the idea that protection of Ohio
wool by tariff is the first rule Of states
manship, though it cost every man out
side of Ohio about three dollars more in
ten for clothing. The same applies to
coal, pottery, and glassware. Of course
it is patriotic to almost exclude the for
eign articles, in order to give Ohio man
ufacturers a royal grant of monopoly.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

The eyes Of the whole world were on
Germany yesterday, as the success Of Bis
marcks plan to increase the military es-
adjustment is involved in the election of
members to the Reichstag, and conse-
quently the peace of Europe. 1t is the
general belief that the Chancellor has
won, aud it is the opinion Of the best
Judges that the move of Germany in this
direction is entirely the result Of the ac-
ton of France in increasing its army.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

Congressman Thomas proposes a Navy
appropriation of $5,0OO,0OO to supersede
seven or eight bills that cover $3O,OOOOOO.
His idea is to have a certain number Of
fast cruisers, backed by torpedo boats.
The types that the committee proposes
to repeat are those OF the cruiser Newark
and GunbOat No. /, two more of the
former and four Of the latter being rec
commended. Only one torpedo boat is
now provided for as the disposition is to
await the completion Of the dynamite
craft now under construction, which,
should it fulfill expectation, would doubt
less be largely duplicated.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22
NORFOLK AND WESTERN RAIL
~ ROAD.
IN EFFECT JANUARY II, 1887.
TWO DAILY TRAINS TO NORFOLK.
TWO DAILY TRAINS TO LYNCHBURG.

LEAVE RICHMOND
lbs am. Daily. via Richmond and Peters
burg railroad. Arrive at Petersburg
l2:l5 pm: leave Petersburg 1870
pm. daily; arrive at Norfolk $40
pm.
lbs am. Daily, via Richmond and Peters
burg railroad. Arrive at Peters
burg l2:lj pm. No. leaves Peters
burg l2:iO pm. for Farmylle,
Lynchburg. Roanoke, Bristol. Knox
vile, and all points south and
west.
$780, pm. Daily, except Sunday, yia Richmond
and Petersburg railroad. Arrive
Petersburg 1:l5 pm; leaves Peters
burg 40 pm. daily arriving Nor
folk 10 pm. Through car Richmond
10 Norfolk.
$50 JPN. Daily, except Sunday, via Richmond
and Petersburg railroad. Arrive at
Petersburg 7:l5 pm, connecting
with Train No. leaving Petersburg
at s.25 pm. for Farmville, Lyncn-
burg, Roanoke, Bristol, Knoxville,
CHATTANOOGA and all points south
and west.
PULLMAN SLEEPING-CAR ACCOMMODA-
TIONS.
No. l-Sleeping-car from Petersburg 10 Bris-
tOl without change.
No 3-ROanOke 10 Atlanta, Macon, and New
Orleans without change.
Tickets, baggage checks, and all information
can be obtained at Richmond and Petersburg
railroad depot and at A. W. Carriers, 100 Main
street. W. IS. BEN LII,
General Passenger and Ticket Agent
CHARLES G.. EDDY, Vice President.
General office, Roanoke, Va. az
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

*Daily. +Daily except Sunday.
Trains on Buckingham railroad branch leave
Bremo Bluff for AKRON daily ex cept Sunday
at 6:l8 am. and 6:l7 pm. Returning, leave
AKRON daily, except Sunday, at $40 am. and
6:3j pm
Sleeping-cars attached 10 Trains Nos. Q and
10 between Lynchburg and Richmond.
CONNECTIONS.-At Clifton Forge with c.
& O. Ry for the South, West, and Northwest
At Lynchburg with n. w. R'y for all points
South. Southeast, and Southwest, V. VI. R'y
for all points North and South. At Richmond
with Associated Railways for all points in the
South and r., f. & p II. r. for all points
North. AT Lexington with Is. * y. Il. II.
making close connection at Harper's Ferry to
and from Pittsburg and the West, also TO points
North and East. For further information ap
ply to j. X. MACMU HDO, u +. A,
de4 Richmond. Va.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22
uis salary DIGIT Go Up.

Il had oeen working for three years for one
Of our old time wholesale houses, said a De-
troiter who was calling up "reminiscences,
and / finally concluded that ought TO haze
a raise If salary. | began sn s. per week
and was raised 10 s., but there il had stuck
for two years The head man d IL. firm
was cold, stiff, auster9 man, 1ao seldom
recognized an employee and yas mown to be
hard hearted. l hesitated a long tinle uefore
daring 70 approach him on the subJectrearest
b. ny heart, but one day l slid iI'o the
private Office when | knew he was eloGe.
4'Well, sir he snaps out, short rs pie
crust
al came TOTO
Game to what, sir"
all came 20 ask you il you-veu didn't
Think -
"'See. here, William" he said as he wheeled
around on me, If my daughter loves you, and
you love her, I've no objection to your mar
riage Fix it up between you and don't
bother me again
"The old reynard He had daughter,
but / had never spoken 10 ler in my life, and
he knew it, He answered me the way he did
10 stop me from asking for a raise Of salary.
1t was year and half after that before |
was lifted 10 IS per week Detroit Free
Prose
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22
FREIGHT RATES AS LOW AS VIA OTHER
LINES

Special low freight contracts will be made
upon application. shippers desiring TO take
advantage of these cheap rates between New
York, Philadelphia, and Richmond will be
careful 10 direct goods 90 be sent via the New
York Philadelphia, and Norfolk railroad
Cape Charles route, and shipped from New
York from Pennsylvania railroad, new Pier
p; from Philadelphia from DOck-street sta
ton, and Richmond from COmpany's wharf,
Rockets.
FOR further information apply TO f. 5.
BAKER, Agent Richmond.
II. w. dunno, Superintendent
X. b. COOKE, General Passenger Freight
Agent, Richmond, Va. and Norfolk Va. pfc 9
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

Mr.. Lester sues Ben Butler for $780,
900 damages for false imprisonment dur
ing the war The verdict was for Ben,
so the cockeyed man of destiny saves his
ill-gotten gains. A contemporary re-
marks that if Lester had won, the prece-
dent would have melted the whole But
Ter fortune.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

Austria has an army of over a million
of men, and if she takes the field will be
vastly more formidable than people think
who have only in mind the disasters she
suffered in the Austro- Prussian war.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22
NEW YORK, PHILADELPHIA
y AND
NORFOLK RAILROAD COMPANY.
NEW PASSENGER AND FREIGHT LINE
BETWEEN
NEW YORK, PHILADELPHIA, AND
RICHMOND.
Schedule I'm Effect November I.

Going North. leaves Richmond. COmpany's
wharf, Rockets at am. on Tuesdays, Thurs
days, and Saturdays, arriving at Cape Charles
at pine; arrive IN Philadelphia at 500 AIM,
arrive in New York al am.
Leave New York via Pennsylvania railroad
every Sunday, Tuesday. and Thursday at 8
pm; Philadcldha at ll:2O pm. from Pennsyl-
vania railroad. BrOad-street station. Arrive
Cape Charles $50 am, leave Cape Charles by
steamer "Old Point Comfort" at pm. arriv-
ing at Richmond al Is pm.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

There is an authentic report of grand
reconciliation between France and the
Vatican, in token of which the French
representative at Rome presents the Pope
with splendid Sevres vase.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

1t ought to have been time for the pop
ular storm to gather head against that
House Pensions Committee for reporting
in favor of passing the nefarious depend
ent Pension bill. The present House of
Representatives is expected to reduce
taxes and prevent, not squander, the sur
plnS
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

Minister Pendleton says that this coun-
try has always managed to defend herself
by hook or by crook, whether we were
found unprepared or not That sounds
like left hand hint that we had better
reduce taxation first, and think of mil
lions for navy afterwards.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

Mr.. Parkes, the great ape superintend-
ent, who discovered that this Darwinian
could do better work than the donkey at
cheaper rates, has ordered more apes from
Africa. Does Mr.. Parkes opine tnat ~
is going to allow a monkey unless he is a
Knight of Laber?
Mr.. Parkes is not the first, however, to
start this idea. 1t is the tale of famous
traveller that the black natives of the
Congo showed the Chimpanzee how to
work, and the animal initiated the task.
And we all have heard colored ladies say
that the organ grinders monkey would
not talk because the white people would
put him to work.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

TheTennessee Legislature has an orator
in the person of Statesman Davis, who,
speaking on temperance question, said ;
This resolution bursts like the waves
of the raging sea against the everlasting
SUBMITS of the liquor dealers of the State
of Tennessee"
Here in reply to an interruption he re-
marked:
"Mr Speaker, | am aware that there
are some jackasses on this floor"
And then went on again as follows:
"The only liquor | ever drink is that
which God brews in the green glades and
grassy dells, where the deer wander and
the children love to play-that beverage
of life, health giving water.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

The recent death of DR.. William Perry, oi
Exeter, n. H., has left only one survivor Of
the party that was with Fulton on his first
steamboat voyage, in the person of Col
George L. Perkins, of Norwich, Conn, who,
at 9s years DID, is the active and energetic
treasurer Of the Norwich and Worcester rail-
road.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22
RAILROADS.

Bon-Air Accommodation leaves Richmond
5:15 pm+ arrive Richmond S4l ami
Mixed Train leaves Manchester $40 ami Tor
Burkevilc, stopping at intermediate staI'o"S :
arrives Manchester $40 PM.
SLEEPING-CAR SERVICE.
On Trains - and 80 sleeping cars are run Oe-
tween Richmond and Greensboro. Inese cars
are open at pm. for passengers. Sleeping -cai ;
are also run on - and 50 between Danville and
Montgomery, Danyille and Aiken, Greensboro
and Raleigh; on trains Nos. 30 and 81 sleeping
cars are run between Danville and Atlanta,
and Danville and New Orleans.
Train No ~ makes close connections at
Greensboro for Raleigh, GOldsboro' and More,
head City: at Salisbury for Ashvile and all
Doints i'm Western North Carolina; and Char
lottee with Chariottee, Columbia, and Augusta
railroad for Columbia, Augusta, Aiken, sa-
vannah, Charleston, and Florida; also with
Carolina Central railroad for Wilmi' gton, &c
Train No - has Pullman Buffet sleeping car
from Danville TO Aiken, making close con
nection for Charleston, Savannah, and Jack
Trains Nos. 5Oand 81 make close connection at
Greensboro for Raleigh and all points on
North Carolina division Pullman sleeper Is
run on these trains between Greensboro and
TRAINS ON YORK-RIyER LINE.
Leave Richmond Arrive Richmond
s3.sO nm 5000 am
Leave 18th street Arrive 2Sth street
1910 am, Freight 1920 pm, Freight.
Train leaving Richmond at 800 pm. connects
at West Point every Monday, Tuesday, Thurs
day, and Saturday with boat, arriving at Baltl-
more am.
Fare-RichmOnd TO Baltimore only 81, first
class $50 second-class.
*Daily +Daily except Sunday.
Depot and ticket Office foot Virginia street.
uptown Office corner Tenth and Main streets.
JAMES l.. TAYLOR,
General Passenger Agent.
SOL. HAAS Traffic Manager.
f.. b. THOMAS. General Manager ia ;
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

We are gratified to read in the Dispatch
that Richmond stands so high in its hon
ored record of water drinking.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

The usual standing rumor Of war in
Europe is still vibrating on the wires
with its habitual nervous unreliability.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

The modesty of the New York Herald
moves it to say that, when Byron began
his famous Epic with 81 want hero,
if the Herald had then been extant he
would have advertised for the article in
the want column.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22
CHEsAPEAKE AND OHIO ROUTE
SCHEDULE IN EFFECT NOVEMBER
2lsT, 1856.
LEAVE RICHMOND

LEAVE RICHMOND:
845 am For Newport News, Old Point Com
fort and Norfolk, daily except Sum
day.
1l1O am Through and Local Mail to all
points West. Sleepers from Clifton
Forge TO Huntington, except Sun
day.
$40 pm For Newport News, Old Point and
Norfolk. Except Sunday.
400 pm Charlottesville accommodation.
Except Sunday.
6:25 pm For Louisville, Cincinnati, Chicago,
st. Louis, Memphis, and New Or
leans. Fast Express, with through
Pullmans Daily. only route run
ming Pullmans West from Rich
mOnd.
SUNDAY EXCURSION
TO Newport News and Old Point at
8 am.
ARRIVE RICHMOND:
$40 ana Charlottesville accommodation.
ll:05 am From Norfolk, Old Point, and
Newport News except Sunday.
3:O5 pm From Local points and the west
daily except Sunday.
6:10 pm From Norfolk, Old Point and New
port News, daily except Sunday
$50 pm From Louisville and Cincinnati
Fast Express daily
Sunday excursion train from Old
Point and Newport News arrives in
Richmond at 6:l5 pm.
Depot Seventeenth and Broad streets.
Ticket-ofiices: 1000 Main street and depot.
II. w. FULLER.
General Passenger Agent
WINS. G. WICKHAM, Second Vice-PreSident.
RICHMOND, FREDERICKSBURG AND
~ POTOMAC.
THROUGH ALL-RAIL FAST-FREIGHT
LINE TO AND FROM BALTIMORE,
PHILADELPHIA, NEW YORK,
AND + A ST ERN AND
WESTERN CITIES.
ONLY TWELVE HOURS BETWEEN
RICHMOND AND BALTIMORE
IN EACH DIRECTION.
Correspondingly quick timet other points.
Through bills Of laden issued at low rates.
c. A. TAYLOR,
Oc22 General Freight Agent
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

run between New York and Philadelphia and
Cape Charles. Passengers can take the Phila-
delphia sleeper at Philadelphia Broad street
station al I'D pm. coming South, and are al
lowed TO remain in the sleeper on arrival at
Philadelphia until am, without being dis
TURNED.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22
LOW PASSENGER RATES.

To New York Qimited two days, s 80
TO New York unlimited 10 90
To Philadelphia limited two days, 30
To Philadelphia (unlimited. 50
Second class 10 New York 0imited TO
two days. 80
Baggage checked through.
Close connection made at New York with
all boat and rail lines for Boston and all points
Fast
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

When newspaper reporters send their
cards to Brother Blaine they receive them
back thus inscribed Not in. j. c. b. -
He will use the same inscription after
1SSS-AHanta Constitution.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22
ASHLAND TRAINS.


400 pm. accommodation, leaves Broad street
station arrives at Ashland at pm
6:04 pm. leaves Elba arrives at Ashland at
6:44 pm.
6:25 am arrives at Elba; leaves Ashland at
5.24 am.
$50 am. accommodation, arrives at Broad
street station; leaves Ashland at 8
am.
$50 pm. arrives at Elba; leaves Ashland at
5:l2 pm.
C. A. TAYLOR. General Ticket Agent.
T.. T. ID. MYERS. General Superintendent.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22
SPECIAL AND Personal.

Mrs. Miller is lecturing against bustles;
but, really, it looks as if dress reform
should approach question squarely and
in front.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

Liberal commission to agents to solicit
subscriptions.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

DICHMOND, FREDERICKSBURG
IL AND POTOMAC RAILROADS.&C.
commencing NOVEMBER %, lSS6-eastern
standard time:
700 am. leaves Byrd-street station daily stops
only at Ashland Junction, Milford,
and Fredericksburg. sleeper 20
Washington. Leaves Washington for
New York at ll:20 am.
llO7 am. leaves Byrd-street station daily, ex-
cept Sunday Leaves Washington for
New York at 4:20 pm, also by limited
at $3.50 pm.
$40 pm. leaves Byrd-street station daily
Sleeper to New York.
1929 am. arrives at Byrd-street station daily
Sleeper from New York.
259 pm. arrives at Byrd street station daily
stops at Fredericksburg, Milford, and
Junction. Sleeper from Washington.
9l5 pm. arrives at Byrd street station daily,
except Sunday.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22
HE ONLY ALL-RAILLTNE TO NORFOLK.


superintendent Of Transportation.
r. NJ EMERSON, General Passenger Agent.
Sol HAAS. Traffic Manager. de p
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

Citv delivery by carriers at cents per week.
aY MALL. POeTAGE PAID.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22
RAILROADS.
M& -

DICHMOND AND ALLEGHANY
IL RAILROAD.
cCUEDIrIF OF TRAINS IN EFFECT NO
vruprR % 1875.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22

Bon-Air Accommodation leaves Richmond
5l5 pint; arrive Richmond S4l AMI
Mixed Train leaves Manchester o:tO am loi
Rnrkevillc. stopping at intermediate stations
arrives Manchester $40 PM.
The Daily times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1886-1889, 1887-02-22
TRAINS NORTHW ARD.
Arrive
No. Petersburg. Richmond.
ally. tDaily except Sunday.
STOPPING PLACES

SIOPPjNG PIACES.
Nos - and 81 make no stops. Nos. 10, % 60
and rs stop only on signal at Manchester, Cen
tralia and Chester. Nos 81, 81, 33, 81, - and SO
will stop at all stations for passengers.
PULLMAN CAR SERVICE.
On trains Nos. -, q, and rs sleeping cars be
tween Washington and Jacksonville. On
Trains Nos - and 81 sleeping-cars between
Washington and Charleston. ON Train No. 81
sleeping-car between Tampa, Fla, and Wash
ingtOn via jacksonville. On Train No 70
sleeping-car between Jacksonville and New
York. On Trains Nos. . and IS sleeping cars
between New York and Aiken, ). c., via
Charleston. On Train No. % sleeping-ca be-
tween New York and Tampa, Fla, via Jack
sOnvillel
THE ONLY ALLrRAIL LINE TO NORFOLK.
LEAVE. ARRIVE.
Richmond. *ll:25 am. Norfolk $40 pm.
Richmond. 1890 pm. Norfolk, l0OOpm.
Norfolk $3.50 am. Richmond, 1870 pm.
Norfolk 1880 pm. Richmond, 9:20 pm
These trains also make close connection TO
and from Farmyille, Lynchburg, and south
western points. and all stations on the Norfolk
and Western railroad.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1887-06-30
SQUIBS.

1t may be better to be right than to
be president, but the salary is smaller
in this country, anyhow.
Stiggins married his type-writing
girl. Before they were married he
was in the habit of debating to her,
but after marriage she dictated to him.
A New York lawyer, being asked
what a contingent fee was, replied, aft
l get nothing; if l win the suit you get
nothing"
Down in Revere they use water
drawn from artesian wells, and dis
cOuraged mother says it is so hard that
the neighbors can hear it squeak when
she uses it to wash the baby.
1t was Mississippi man who put it
thus: cat the earnest solicitation of
those to whom | owe money, have
consented to become a candidate for
the county treasuryship."
There are some very mean men in
this world, but the Picayune of New
Orleans has found one who takes the
palm. He uses the wart on the back
of his neck for collar buttOn.-GNew
York Herald.
Letting the cat out of the bag. "NOw,
children" said a country mother who
was going out, abe real good while Pm
away, and be sure you don't go near
the churn where hid them nut cakes"
-[Detroit Free Press.
A pastor in this city has on the wall
of his study in large, but not too con-
spicuOus letters, for the benefit of his
visitors, this scriptural benediction
"The Lord bless thy goings out"
detroit Christian Herald.
Conductor" said a passenger on a
Southern railroad, "my hat has blown
out of the window" allow long ago9"
"AbOut 10 minutes" "Well," said the
conductor, pulling the rope, 'T'll back
up for it, but it's lucky for you you
spoke in time"
Smith who is afflicted with a sore
throat, has asked his friend Brown to
examine it. Brown (peering down
Smiths thrOat)-"On which side is the
sore spot 2" Smith, (speaking with
difficulty)-"On the left side" Brown
-"COming up or going down 2"