The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1887-07-30

one OF tnOSe IhVOreu ny toi' IiuHio' Out
II seems strange that no one but Col.
Plumb's fearless, free and Independent"
understrappers are tearing their undergar'
ments now. a.days about the sayings of Doc
Norton and Billy Dryer,
The La Sale Democrat says lIeman Il
Chapman, OF the U. s, Express robbery
fame, Just released from debtors prison,
is going to get even with his prosecutions
He intends shortly to publish book con
talning full account Of the trial and his
imprisonment" If brother f. +. Bull sur
wives that attack on him we'll guarantee
him reduction in his life insurance prem
iums!
When II comes to real sweet obituary,
the fellow who furnishes Andrew Jackson
Reddick with such brains as his paper can
boast, exhibits perennial fertility quite as
tonishing. We had supposed the fellow
was genius in this line; but the Peru
Heruld somehow stole the secret, and thus
gives pointer to the boys who were wont
10 start on a 1000 mile walk when first
class article was necessary with second
class subject as the basis of the post NOR
TEN eifusion:-
Are you on TO how some Of our valued
cotemp Oraries manage to publish 81 varied
rod
course net You don't know how the dear
editor, who don't know ue Kid that just
died-whose father takes the dear editors
paper thOugh-Can speak Of little Sammy
rs the most dearly beloved, and eXasper
atingly and eXcruclatingly beautiful little
angel that ever a kind, wise and beneticent
Providence had called TO It's heavenly rest
in the grandiloquent, diamond studded
home beyond the ethereal, cerulean sky,
the doors of which mansion was held open
by St Peter and all the archangels, while
the precious soul was waited through the
doorway on zephers that float in heaven,
alnne;' you don't know, we say how any
thing like the above can come from any
one whose heart is not rent in agony. Well,
the things are kept "in stock" the obitu-
aries we mean, not the kids When an eX
change appears with an unusually good
obituary notice, the latter is clipped out
and dumped with hundreds of others in
cgar box That's where your high falu.
tin death notices come from mostly. When
an exchange has one or more good notices,
they are cut out by the editor, who, from
force of habit, mechanically remarks, lust
the thing, precisely, that will just tit little
Billy Simpkins when he dies OF the Group;
T.. n,,l
yes, stree, it's dandy" If Tommy Smith
ers dies, and his father has not been sub.
scriber or won't become before the funeral,
he will get shot in this wise: Tom
Smith, or Smythers, we don't know which,
got killed by the cars Saturday, funeral
Sunday, no pOstponement Children should
know better than TO monkey around cars"
Bang. That obituary is not kept in stock
IN cigar box.
The true inwardness of the enthusiasm
of the "tearless, free and Independent"
journals of this city and county in their
support of Col. Ralph Plumb for congress
is fast coming out; and but confirms the
statements made by the FREE TRADER
whole gang to sound his praises as a high
toned, high-minded, disinterested consci-
entous, Christian statesman, &c, &c.
Though the good Colonel denied the fact
over his own signature that he owned any
part of the Joliet Press or was interested in
il in any way, 1t was only few weeks after
the election that he gobbled the whole con
Germ by an unrecorded chattle mortgage
viii he gobble the Ottawa Journal in the
same way, one of these days? Meantime,
as our old correspondent .Escus elsewhere
points out, the truth in the Streator cases is
also coming out, slowly but surely, by rea
son of little difference between the sweet
scented Doc Leroy (who while bowling in
June about the boodlers, in another breath
asked the democratic candidate for treas.
urer for pay for the support of the Ind =
| Times during his canvass) and Johnny For
nof of the Free Press. The affair is max
ing very bad smell in Streator (mu h
worse than burning ton or SO OF giant
| powder and Olo rags; Out Wnen tne emu
comes, We'll bet the cigars for the crowd,
every substantial fact uttered by the FREE
TRADER in November last will have been
fully verified, the attidavits of Col. Plumb
ana his friends, circulated by the republi
can central committee, to the contrary not
withstanding,
Will the good Colonel be candidate for
a third term In 1888? 1--WE want to know"
Rose of the cellar has so often, so delib-
erately and so thoroughly studied the bills
sent into the county board for public print,
ing, that the only thing that can be said OF
his statement, that the county will be called
upon to pay $3.50 for publishing the pro
ceedings of the last session of the Board
Is that he is willful, deliberate and mali
cious liar. The printing for the March
session did cost $l44, but the record was
the largest ever printed In this county and