davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
Rough On the Chaplain.
New York Tribune.

Gen. n. P. Banks tells story about one
of his army chaplains which never fails to
"bripg down" the G.. A. r. camp-fires.
The chaplains of the regiments during the
war bad charge of the mails for the regi-
ments to which they were attached. The
mail for the regiment of this particular
chaplain had not come to hand for many
days. The regiment was out OF the line
of communication. Every day from one
half to two-thirds Of the soldier boys tiled
ND to the chaplain's tent with such stereo-
typed inquiries as thee:
ANY mail yet, CHAPLAIN"
"Have you heard from the mail?
'Do you know when the mails will
Gomez
What do you think is delaying the
mail2"
quiries that he had no time to prepare his
weekly sermon. He was obliged to spend
all his time in explaining that he had no
mail, that he had heard nothing about the
mail, and that he knew nothing about the
mail. Il occurred to him that he might
put an end TO his troubles by sign. Pro-
curing the bottom OF an old bareback box
be marked 1t with charcoal and nailed it
on tree in front OF his tent so that all
might see this notice.:
THE CHAPLAIN DOES NOTK NOW WHEN THE NAIL
WILL ARRIVE.
Tie next anxious inquirer who came
along was a reckless young wag. He gszed
for q while at the notice, and discovering
the piece of charcoal which the chapalin
had dropped to the ground at the COM
pletion OF the sign, he seized it and added
these words:
AND HE DON'T CARE A On.
The chaplain took in tie sign and never
put out another.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07

mediate presence ct the sick chamber with
the exclamation, They think Mrs. - is
dying" He huIries to the scene with
rapid pace and anxious feeling. The
stump Is of a crimson color, and the
patient lies in a profound swoon. An
artery has suddenly given way; the ex-
baustion is extreme; cordials and
stimulsnts are at once brought into re-
QUESTION, the dressings are removed, and
the recusant vessel is promptly secured.
The vital current ebos and lows. Reac.
ton is still more tardy than before, and 1t
is not until late hour OF the night that
the surgeon, literally worn ont in mind
and body, retires to his home in search of
repose. Does he sleep? He tries but he
can not close his eyes. His mind is with
his patient; he hears every footstep upon
the pavement under his window, and is in
momentary expectation of the ringing of
the night-bell. He is disturbed by the
widest fsncles, he sees the most terrific OBJ
jects, and, as he rlses early In the morning
to hasten to his patients chamber, he feels
that he has been cheated of the rest OF
which he stood 20 much in need. Is this
picture overdrawn2 l have sat for it
thousand times, and there is not an edu-
Gated, conscientious surgeon that will not
certify to its accuracy.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
Her First Sea Bath.

This is a truthful and most accurate de-
scription of how q woman acts when she
first puts on a bathing suit and appears be.
fore the world in 1t. At first sight of it
she giggles convulsively and filters out:
"Oh, never, never can let anybody see
me with that on"
''Oh, yes you csn.HPut it on" cries
some hardened companion who has been
in before Everybody wears them"
But I'll look so awful"
"Who cares? Noboiy'll know you"
Then she gets into it Cycling furiously.
ooh, Just can't go out In It,"
"Yes, you must"
"But how can II"
"Bah; nobody'll notice you in the least %
"But know look perfectly dreadful"
"Well. everybody else looks so. too"
II know, but l" (giggle), II shall die IL
see any body know"
You ready ?"
eyes, I-I-guess sol Oh, Just don't
believe L can go after all. Don't look
swful2'
"Pooh! mol Come onl"
81 can't bear to. Tee, hee, hee, heew
But she does, all the same, giggling
franticaIly until she reaches the water,
when she shrieks out:
"Ob, it's cotd Ughl Hee, Heel I'll
look so awful when Pm wet o o-o-o-h
it's dreadfully cold"
And when she comes out and is dressed
again she bores everybody she knows by
ing over and over again:
"Oh, / think it's Just lovely to battle
I'm going in every dsyl Isn't 1t fun?
nat love to lie down and let the waves
run oyer plel amt one bit afraid now
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
100000 a Year for Fun.

new OK Sp6Cldl W
Ly ing in a comfortable room on the sec.
ond floor of the United States Hotel, in
Newark, with his leg broken. is a middle
aged man, who must have bad good deal
of fun, such as it was. He has spent
large fortune in seven years at the rate of
$l0O,000 q year, and new has nothing with
which to pay his board or for medical at.
tendance. His name is Andrew Browne,
and he says he is the eldest son Of Obadiah
Browne, once Congressman from Staten
Island. Andrew was well known at one
time in this city. He lived in grand style
at the best hotels. His grandfather be-
oueathed him property in John street and
other parts of the city to the value of
$1,000 he also left him considerable
property in New Jersey, all Of which An
drew converted first into cash and then into
the highest kind of living.
He formed habit of going out with
81 600 and coming back with empty pockets
two or three times week. Women would
get the greater part of the money, and they
always left him in q condition that rem
dered him oblivious of where the funds
vent. After dissipating all of his wealth,
even to small remnants of property in tn
claypits of Middlesex County, New Jersey,
Bovine drifted into Newark, looking like q
tramp, and applied for help to Judge
Meeker, who was an acquaintance of his
father. Browne finally dTifted away from
Newark and found shelter with family at
Whippany, Morris County. When sober
and we'll dressed he is q rather fine looking
fellow. He is tall and has broad shoulders,
straight limbs and an intelligent counte-
nance. His full beard is tinged with gray,
and his eyes are large and black.
He said to day while lying In bed at the
hotel: This is my own fault. 1 have
been on another spree. / went to New
York a week ago and received 500 from
the lawyers in case of which 1 knew
something. They paid me for what intor.
nation gave them, and asked me to stay
away from the city. / came to Newark
| that night, and, after paying some debts,
left $25 with the clerk at the Continental
| Hotel. That is about all I can remember
until 1 woke up this morning in this
ROOM"
Browne was taken to the hotel by cab
driver. He will be removed to the city
J hospital
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
cHIcAGo's MARKETS.

Wheat Leaves the Old Rut-COrn Active
and Fairly BuOyant-PrOvlsions.
CHICAGO, September Especial. The
wheat market on change has at last left
the old Tut, and business showed health
Ter activity. Leading operators agree that
all artificial causes OF depression are prac-
tically eliminated from the situation and
the markets of the world are now on their
merits. The dizziness in foreign markets
has given place to comparative strength
and higher prices. The bankrupt stocks of
California grain whose pressure upon the
Liverpool trade was so much dreaded,
proved no load at all. English bargain
hunters greedily snapped up the stuff and
were unable to get as much of the wonder
fully cheap property as they wanted. The
renewed talk OF "hot' wheat here was also
without effect.
Traders felt that the thing had been dis.
counted over and again, and even the
official announcement that about $40, 900
bushels in the Pacific and Nicely elevators
was actually "out of condition" resulted
in 10 decline.
Indeed the bulls claimed that as just
that much wheat was thus taken out of the
visible supply and as the investigation had
made 1t certain that the remainder is In
prime condition, the whole thing is an
argument for higher prices. At primary
points receipts are still light aud despite
the heavy shipments from Atlantic ports
the demand on foreign account is increasing
instead of diminishing. English operators
who sold short here a week ago have
covered and can now be found on the bull
side. Estimates on Mondays visible
supply put the decrease st 1000, 900
bushels, sn unhesrd of state Of affairs at
this season of The year. The amount of
wheat afioat bound for the United kingdom
end continent is now about 5000, 900
bushels less than last year and the visible
supply is 100000 less than last year,
making the total available supply less by
nearly 2,000, 900 bushels. Reports from the
harvest fields of the Northwest are as bad
or wore than heretofore ana the 'early
rush" Of new wheat is not much talked of.
Corn rules active and fairly buoyant
Recent advlces from the south western corn
section seem to confirm the widest early
reports Of damage and receip.s
| although large, are not up tc
expectations. Since ''Old Hutch was sus
| pended he has been buying q good deal OF
corn through brokers. Local stocks are
| very light and some shorts are getting anx
1 ious.
Provisions are quiet but firm. The rib
| which were passed out Thursday were al
| taken by Armour 81 Co., and the firm have
| been fair buyers since. The shipping de
| msnd for meats is at low ebb, but lard is
| being well taken.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
FORTUNES FOR PRINTERS.

Flush Days For Followers of the Art Pro
sentative i'm Colorado.
A Denver letter to the New York Mail
and Express gives some interesting rem
iniscences OF the old days in that section,
and the ups and downs of frontier life
There was great rush for Job printing,
and prices were steep. They got $40 per
1000 for cards, letter. heads, envelopes, and
so on, and, as stock was scarce and they
wanted 10 accommodate every body, they
gave only 200 or 800 cards or letter-heads,
as the case might be, to the LOCO. They
were soon taking in between $500 and 5000
a day for Job work, and in exciting times
they had TO keep the press running as late
SIS - o'clock at night to supply the demand
for papers. An amusing story is told by
Col. Atkins, which illustrates the go-as-you-
please manner in which they charged for
work.
One evening as the men were washing
0p.to go home a stranger dropped in and
said he wanted a job of printing done, and
he wanted it that night. Col. Atkins told
him 1t would be impossible to let him
have it, but he insisted that he must have
II, and expressed a willingness to pay
literally. He explained what he wanted
ten cards the size of playing cards, nine
with the numbers on them from one to
nine, and then a single one with on II.
The Job was taken, and they were to seud
the cards and bill TO Tom Kemps saloon
ard gambling hall, where the stranger
would be waiting for them at 8 o'clock.
They took a planer and mallet and printed
the cards in five minutes. Then Atkins,
Burnell and Davis went to supper.
"What'll We tax him for that job?" Da-
Wis asked.
How will $40 dor" inquired Burnell,
''or would he think it too muchT"
Ten nothings!" said Atkins. "Why,
charge something for our trouble-make
out bill for S25."
Davis and Burnelll were afraid, but the
bill was made out, and Atkins agreed to
collect it. He went to Tom Kemp's saloon
at 8 o'clock, and the stranger was there.
"Have you got 'emp' he asked, coming
close to Atkins and whispering in his ear.
Yes" was the Whispered answer.
Where are they?"
"Here."
A thin package exchanged hands, and
the gambler put them into bis pocket.
How muchp
twenty-five dollars"
The money was counted out, and Atkins
receipted the bill and turned to 90, when
the stranger caught his arm and said:
Look a-here, Csp'n I'm thief-Pm a
gambler; that's the way | N axe my Twin +;
but, say, isn't this leetle high"
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
The Last Week

Uncle Charles latest exercise lis giving the
readers Of "Knotty Problems" genuine hunt,
for much work seems to be necessary in order
10 get any considerable list OF words. Those
who haves not ct forward their lists Shouts
hasten 10 do 10, as the contest is near its
clofe.
The words are to be formed from rat" by
adding other letters 10 those three. -Four prizes
will be awarded-the best beiug a Waterbury
watch, q really good tfme-keeper. All are in
vited to take part the competition,
observing carefully these conditions
~ All words must be defined In
the body of webster's Unabridged
Dictionary exclusive of supplement- and
appendices. 2. No word win be allowed unless
il contains the three letters OF rat without
transposition separation by other letters.
g. Words having ''rat'' as the first three letters
will not be admitted. as all such may be copied
in regular order from the dictionary. T. one
spell .ng can count only as one word. no matter
how many definitions IL may have >. TIE
words of each list should be arranged in alpha
betieal order and numbered. 6. In case OF q tie,
preference will be given for that one of the ~.
ing lists from which fewest words are rejected
for violation of these rules. z. ALI lists must
be sent in before September 10.
Specimens of the allowable words are: i.
Crate, q Hydrate. 8. Grafton. Give the others,
Answers.
G67-Mall-bagS.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
Editorial Adjectives.

columbus TO- CaDital.J
Pasted over the desk of the city editor of
a Georgia paper are the following instruc.
tons to reporters:
'All brides are lovely, beautiful and &C.
complished, except they be cid and tough
widows, and then they are amiable and
cultivated.
"An merchants who advertise are enter
pri sing, wide-awake, and q credit to Our
city. The names of those who do not ad-
vertise mu st not appear ID our paper.
All old lawyers are able and worthy OF
place on the supreme bench. Young
lawyers are promising and s1lvery -toDgued
Conductors on passenger trains are gen
tlemanly and courteous.
doctors ere eminent.I
Formers are intelligent.
Candidates who put their announce
ments in our paper are gaming ground
every day. Those who do not announce
are likely to be defeated"
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07

L was awfplly frightened at frstl 1 don't
mind my looks one bit noTl I'd like to
have my photograph taken in my bathing
suit It'd be jolly fun, wouldn't it2 1
got some water in my mouth, and isn't
1t saltyf Oh, it's just splendidl Pm GO
ing in three times some days. I believe
it'll do me good Oh, I'm wild over
bathingi It's just too perfectly lovely
and jolly for anythfng!"
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
No eOSs-A Reversal.

No SOS5-A Reversal.
'Tis the germs .'eulex" and simply fly
You are invited to use aud freely to try
II relish or taste can be found.
The sting of bee, or sharp twanging sound,
Or the tongue of a buckle. or part of a Enife,
A Siamese dry measure-with meaning its rife.
"How easy to findl' you surely will say;
But guess it, We wise ones; | hope that We may.
iELOA
No 2oS6.-A Double Word Enigma.
'Some players" who have gained name,
"Haye won" much wealth as well as fame:
''They play" for thousands every night
And give ITO multitude delight.
And some by their sweet gift of song
Can 'captivate' larger Thong.
seek TO acquire this art divine;
o, wondrous gift, would twere minel
Two characters from Shakespeare find,
Who were not strictly Of one mind.
See how the avRricious fall,
Who grasp for too much and lose all
CHAs. l. HOUSTON,
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
No. aos7-A Numerical Enigma

No. 2OS7-A Numerical Enigma.
Ny q, p, %, "a, Is is an earthly substance
Ny !, 8, 4, 5, 6 is TO FEED greedilY.
Ny u, 13 is verb
Ny IA, 8, l6. II, is. 10. 20 is part of a birds
pluuage.
My %, s, 9, 10 is a small mountain.
Ny 20, z. 2 is deep reverence.
Ny 20, q, Is is to press closely with the arms
My IL is vowel.
Ny whole, OF twenty .nine letters, is the name
of an American traveller and geologist.
ID. CARL STRATTON.
AUSTIN, INDIANA.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
A whoIe-souIed Invitation.
Portland OregOnian. |

You of the East who are bawling Gland
monopoly" Just look this way. Here are
millions Of acres you can have just for the
trouble of coming to get them. Come right
along. No sense in squatting down in the
Eastern cities and yelling '1and mo-
nopoly" Come out here aud become "mo-
nopolists'' yourselves. Henry George
paper please coBy.l
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
Not Too Funny.
lNn- Vnrk 0rrn

Husband Cat the breakfast table)-Why,
aren't we to have those fish caught yester-
day for breakfast. my dear?
Wife-No, John. When ! came TO look
them over, found they were all stale.
Husband putting on q bold 'front.'
Stale That's funny
Wife-Yes, very funny.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
Not Being Wanted.
New York Sun. I

Small boy Eat church picnic)-I say,
Johnny, where's them nice ham san wich-
es your ma put up fer your These amt no
good.
Johnny (bitterlyEThe superintendent
and the teachers is aeatin' of 'em.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07

A well known citizen of Lancaster, Pa
Mr.. i. B. Keller, writes: Having sprained
leg of almost thirty days standing, and af-
ter trying half dozen advertised prepare
tons in the market without satisfactory
results, was advised to try Salvation Oil,
did so, and in less than three days my
leg was all right again. 1t did the work.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
2Q67-Mall-bag

Nag Every.
2o7O-Ingratiate Tin. gray.she ate).
207l-Natural history.
2072-1l Confidante. l2) Guerdon.
2O7S-Buckle, buck, elk, cub.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
No. 2OS4.-A Panel.

Aeross-I. An authoritative example. q
The ninth MOhammedaE month. 3. Turned
to ridicule. 4. Free from ambiguity. S.
name by which Edip buIgh is sometimes called
6. One who determines Il contest 2. A scofFer
s. A stream in Virginia. 9. Anterior.
Diagonals-D a prcgnostic. Up, going
before
Corners-Consonants 2 Vowels. s. Con-
soDants. 4. Novels. .. ConsonaUts, Vow
els. z. Consonants. MUSHROOM
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
No, 2Oss-Transposition.

No, neutrality-suspicious.
Primal expects to pass through life,
And live like flowers that grow.
is poorly fitted for the strife
Which every life must know.
Two better far 10 deem that care
Must come TO each and all:
That we the common lot must share,
The great as well as small. A. L.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
A Thoughtful Servant.

Mrs. Yerger-Matilds, hurry up with
those shoes. What keeps you so long?.
Matilda-Tse.. a-comiug',. mum. /
heard you call the first time, and thought
ter cave time I'd jess button 'en up for you
before puts 'em on,
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
q Q a r ID.

To all who are suffering from the errors and
lndiscretions Of youth, nervous weakness, early
decay, lossof manhood, &c, will send recipe
thatwill cure you. FREE OF CHARGE. This great
remedy discovered by missionary in South
America. Send self-addressed envelope TO the
REV. JOSEPH T. INMAN. Station D. NelO York cits-
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
MARRIED LADIESSs:sas ss Z:

turn man. Inclose self-sddressed stamped en-.
velope and name this paper. Grown Chemical
Company, Ions Arch street. Phfladslphia p -
Liable lady egeau unntods
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07

w ANTED-Three honest. pushing men In
w your vicinity; special inducements now,
fast-seiling specialties. Don't delsy. Salary
from start Brown Brothers, Nurserymen, Chi
cago, IL. 81
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07

WAuu &C Instantrelief Final cure ard nsvH
"HEOs returns Eofndelic.cJs Ee1<h8
~ knife. purge, ealve or suppo1ttorT 4lF<x+ ~
ndallbowel troubles especially cons1pes<co-e
"a IKE r. enterers Win earno nx1run>9tzX&(I
Ees. ~ addresEnGs = h REEVES n&ks.ask-AEJ
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07

VLyANTED-A few energetic travelling sa'es-
w men to sell our famous New York cigars;
references. Address Ches. A. Bartchers First
National Bank Building, Chicago, Ill
7 DAMS negotiated on improved farms in In
il diana and Illinois. Also on city business
blocks in cities of 10 COO population and upward
Noah Cook, Room IA, Ingalls, Block, Indiana
polls, Ind.
E0SALESMEN wanted to sell Nursery stock;
~ good wages: steady employ ment; Tor
terms enclose two cent stamp 10 b. +. Brewer
Eaton, Ohio.
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
No. eOsa-A Metagram.
No. 2Os3-A Progressive Charade.

No. HUS3-A PrO4TeSSiVe Charade.
A noise both loud and shrill,
My better half viii make
This first will surely FL
Your ears and make them ACHE.
Ny last is "spiritless;"
The cause is this, no doubt,
The first so close does press,
And try to blot 1t out.
Joined, I've but letters six,
Though seven when apart;
But they so we'll dc mix,
To seven I've no heart.
So, nightly lCh0le I'll tell;
A certain tree which shows
That beauty's witching spell
is fading like the rose.
r
The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1887-09-07
KNOTTY PROBLEMS.

GOur readers are invited TO furnish original
niemRs, ckarades, riddles. REFUSES, and other
Knotty Problems" addressing AL cOmmuni-
atoms relative 10 this department 10 Z. B.
Lewiston, MEine.l
No. 2Os2-A Metagram.
Imay with truth and brilliance glow,
Though mute and hidden may be;
Or Imsy make a senseless show
OF some poor FOOLS stupidity.
Each man thinks his surpasses all
The very wisest, strongest, best;
But he is one of wisdom small
Who cannot calmly each one test.
Behead me, and I'll quickly rise
With joyous, airy soDg-oird light;
Although a captured culprit tries
To burst me In securing flight.
The half of what am is seen
In ceaSeless numbers near you throngine
In polished, shining forms we CLEAN,
To hold secure some frail belonging.
And what is left describes q god,
Whose mother once this son dfsowned;
His name bespeaks his native sod.
The land where he was once enthroned.
sea,
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1887-07-08
Medicinal Value of Lemons.

"While you are giving people simple rules
for preserving their health, why don't YOU
tell them about the use Of lemonsr' an intel
ligent professional man asked me the other
day. He went on to say that be had long
been troubled with an inactive liver, which
gavehhn a world Of pain and trouble, until
recently he was advised by Q friend TO take
a glass OF bot water. with the juice of half
q lemon squeezed into it, but no sugar, night
and morning, and see what the effect would
be. He tried 1t, and found himself better
almost Immediately. His daily headaches.
which medicine had failed to cure, left him I:
his appetite improved, and he gained several
pounds in weight within few weeks. After
while he omitted the drink, either at night
or In the morning, and now at times does
without either Of them ~ am satisfied from
experiment" said he, "that there is no better
medicine Tor persons who are troubled with
bilious and liver complaints than the simple
remedy have given, which is far more effi.
cacious than quinine or any other drug, while
u is devoid Of their injurious consequences
1t excites the liver, stimulates the digestive
organs and tones up the system generally. II
Is not unpleasant to take either: indeed. one
ssts to liking it.H-Chicago Journal
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1887-07-08
Oak Extract for Tanners.

The making Of oak extract for tanners use
IS new thing, and as there are only few
establishments Of the kind in the country,
this one at Decatur will have an immense sale
Tor Its product. One must wonder why the
idea was not seized upon half century ago
Inc liquid will be shipped direct in kegs and
barrels, and is SO strong that it must be
greatly reduced before going into the watts
IL won't he five years before the tan bark in
hustry will be thing of the past, except as it
gathered for these establishments and by
'e use OF the liquid there is to be a consider
tole Improvement in the grade of leather. -
decatur tAla.) Cor. Detroit Free Press,