St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1887-01-16
THE TRAMPS' LYOEUM.

the week previous, was not there and Pete,
who had rendered his resignation in such
torclble language, was not in his usual place
beside the stove President BlatZ, i'll call
ing the gathering to order, expressed regret
that there was not a larger attendance.
Il Knows" said he. as he brought the AK
handle down with unusual force on the nail
keg, Il knows tibet there's big serIoon
open!n gOin' OH Jest at this mint, and |
knows tibet Their lunch tibet is bein' set up
is one of ther best tibet has been distributed
IN st. Paul fer months. [ jest dropped
in fer mint on my way down
ter Their lyceum, but am sorry to see that
ther members of Their lyceum Is eflowin' er
free lunch to interfere with Their reglar biz
ness of this lvceum. We all recognizes tibet
Their devastatn' of free lunches is er legiIer-
mate part of our perfesSion, an tibet we all
have el reputation ter hold up in this re-
spect but sech biZness is seckerler. as |
might say. an ought not to interfere with
the more erIaberate an high-tone business
of hol6n' up tn here lyceum. An While
this is so | recognizes tibet er lunch like the
one | Seen ter-night is an unusual soft snap.
Their WIS salads, an oysters on the clam
she'll and cold turkey cut on the bias with
decolete trimmin. an saddle Of anterlope,
with old ticker on ther outside and plenty
of bug juice fer gravy and all the ct cetterys
with
Il moves yer tibet Their lyceum takes a
recess Of two hours while we all goes in er
body ter ther joint" said Fireman Nose,
who had listened with
WATERING MOUTH.
while president Blatz had been speaking of
the lunch. lit amt right tibet sech er lay
out should be left ter blush unseen an
waste its sweetness without our ben' there"
continued Nose.
''rher moshun is out er order, an [ shall
take it as Their sense of Their lyceum tibet yer
are fined er dollar for maxim it. 1 also
requests Their other members of ther ~
ceum to refuse ter loan yer any chewin ter
hacker for ther rest of ter meetin, remarked
President BlatZ. with a scowl on his brow.
Err lyceum can't be run without some sort
er discipline. an when it gifts ter be er COM
mon thing for members ter be maxim Sech
fresh breaks eS Their one jest let ont, its
time ter draw Their line. Yer can't run no
kind of er corporation where ther hankerin'
for Their SideShOwS gets erway with ther in
terest in the main circus, Yer hear me
murmur. Their lyceum is now open Ter
business"
The remarks of the president had evil
IDENTITY not fallen on stony ground, for all
the members paid better attention than
usual. The routine business of the lyceum
was disposed of III short order. President
BlatZ announced that as tWo-thirdS Of the
entire membership was not present the res
ignatiOn OF PenSiVe Pete could not legally
be acted on. and would go over for another
week. Under the head of Introduction of
Visitors Omaha Bob arose and said he de-
sired to present to the lyceum a celebrated
tramp, who had made a record as a pie
snatcher in twelve separate and distinct
cities. He had also done time in three
states because in his many wanderings the
laws governing numerous actions in one
state had been forgotten on crossing the
line. AS an instance, Omaha Bob said
that the visitor had once lived in Chicago.
where no penalty is attached to
SLUGGING INNOCENT CITIZENS
and going through their pockets. This had
got to be habit with him, and when on
one occasion he had taken night freight
and walked up in Wisconsin. he failed to
look up the statute OH the point, and had
begun holding up the populaee as he had
done at the stock yards. When arrested
in Wisconsin he had been so surprised and
shocked that he could not tear himself
away from the sheriff as soon as would
have been for his own best good. Ac-
eordingly he had done time. The name of
the visitor was Shack nasty jim. He was
one Of the long green variety of Yankee
who Wore a jaundice colored beard and said
by gosh. and mot by durn sight" with
recklessness and degree of confidence
athat attracted attention. He wore his
trow sers tucked in his boots, and had on a
pair of knit suspenders. He arose and
bowed when his name was pro-
nounced by Omaha Bob. and explained
that he had been a tramp for thirteen years
Il hev a record tibet | am proud of, by
gosh" he said, AN if l dew say it, ther
amt no tramp Oh Their road tibet can lay
over me when it comes tew shnckin' ther
rind OF er pumpkin pie and raiSin' the
deuce with baked beans, not by er durn
sight. | was once er fireman on er loco
motive that run on er road in Ohier. | was
III charge of the coal department of one of
Their great giants tibet pulls our great wag
OnS er!Ong Their network of rails on which
we do business, by gosh, an L he'd er good
enough sit for eny man. One night ther
engineer got off thel cab ter git er
drink, an says ter me, jest fun her down
through the city to ther depot, hev 'er
turned an cum back with her. Go slow
an look out fer Their gates at ther crossin's.
1t was in Cleveland, an at two or three
places Their WAS gates where other roads
crossed the one [ was runnin' on. l was
leetle stuck up, by gosh. because / was in
charge of Their engine, an [ says ter myself,
I'll show 'em l kin run the thing myself.
SO l $ ties down the track, takes hold er
Their lever an says ter myself,
LETTER GO GALLAGHER
er words ter that effect, and went er
flukin' through the city. l see a gate jest
ahead when | got most through the city,
but it was too late fer them hinges, now |
+olI1 M; I aOn1dpft
engine. | scooped that gate clean from its
fasteningS and carried it erlong as smooth es
goose grease on their COW catcher, by gosh.
Their incident sort O ratified me an L failed
ter see ernOther gate that was obstructin'
my pathway, an | scoops her ther some
way. / mout go into ther details, but l
went clean through tibet city, takin' up Ell
collection of gates, an when / got through
had er whole assortment, hand painted.
abled- bodied. all wool gates es ever was
put up for samples. When l stopped Their
engine, l heerd some talk about errestin'
Their man tibet was runnin' Their engine
Thst decided me ter resign from my posi-
ton an l deliberately give up my job an
took er bee line ercross Their country. Since
then | hev been on Their road, ex-
ceptin' er few times when l hev
been laid up for repairs at
Their state expense. sech as thur time Omaha
Bob erudes to in his tlattern' Introduction.
Pm stuck on Their biZness and would never
think of goin' back ter my perfession, not
by darn site.''
A storm of applause greeted the speaker
as he sat down, and his name was at once
placed on the list of honorary members.
Reach-for-it Jones introduced resolution,
TO the effect that committee of three be
appointed to see what effect the influx of
visitors to the carnival would have on the