Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1887-05-08
Mr.. AND MRS. BOWSER.
when Mrs. Il. Had the T~oothache MIR. u.
Mocks Her, But She Gets IA Sweet Re

IL had been annoying me Tor an hour be
for Mr.. Bowser caught on. Then he said:
"Toothache, eh? Well, l don't pity
you a bit. This comes of cracking wal
nuts in your teeth and chewing so much
of that everlasting gum"
Il never cracked a walnut, and l don't
chew gum once a year
well, it's some carelesSnesS OF yours,
rest assured of that, and yen must suffer
for it,"
He went OFF whistling and singing and |
went to bed to suffer.
That tooth ached for three days and three
nights in spite of all remedies. During
the day Mr.. BOwser would remark:
"Aches yet, does it? l believe you are
pretending a great deal, 80 as to get my
sympathy. If you'd get up and go around
| and throw offthei idea that your tooth ached
the pain would all 90 away. Four-titths of
human aches come from imagination.
But it does ache so bad?'
"That is, you imagine it does. | could
90 TO bed and imagine my leg was of, and
| have no doubt that should suffer awful
pains. Well, | can't do anything for you.
If Won will let your imagination run away
with your sense | can't help it,"
The ache hung on so long that finally
went TO the dentist and had the tooth
pulled. This was unbeknOwn to Mr.. Bow
ser, and when he came home that evening
and found me singing TO the baby he
laughed long and loud, and added:
Didn't / tell you so! No doubt you
had a lite bit of tOothache to start with
lust a little bit and imagination did the
rest. If | had gone to work and called you
nv door, dear, stricken, suffering darling,
you'd nave had every tooth jumping out
of your head. It's mighty lucky for you
that YOU married a man with something
besides sawdust under his scalp
Nv revenge came sooner than could have
been-anticipated: 1t wasn'ttwO weeks be-
fore Mr.. BOwser awOke me one night ut
midnight by eXclaiming:
Mrs. BOwser, are you dead or have you
become stone deat?'
'What is it. dear, burglars or fire.
''BurglarS ar fire be hanged! I've been
suffering with the tOOthache for the last
three hours, and you've laid there and
snored away as if You didn't care a cent
whether ! lived or died.
'Rut what can | do? This is the result
of some carelessness of yours. Have you
cracked any walnutS in you teeth lately?'
lie sat up in he'd and held his jaw and
glared ut me 50 iierCely that | was quite
alarmed and went for the medicine-case'
| gave him some peppermint essence on cot
ton; then some oil Of cloves on a rag; then
some camphor on the end of a tOOth-plck'
1t was no use.
II don't believe ! snail live to see day
light" he mOancd as he fell out of bed
and began TO dress.
ooh, yes, YOU will. Are you sure YOU
tooth aches?"
lie looked around after his revolver, bu'
| had slipped it under the bureau.
81 had it, YOU know, or thought had
but | guess it was all imagination. Mr.
Bowscr, just imagine you haven't a tOott
in yOu head"
"And you Just imagine that You are al
old buzzard waiting to pick my hones!' III
roared, ms he danced around.
We tied a bag of hot ashes on his face
and we put on mustard, pain-killer and al
most everything else in the house, AM
none of us slept another wink. Whe
morning came the ache was no better, ant
| coldly observed:
DWELL of course you don't want too keel
the house upset any longer. You'd bette
90 down and have it pulled"
"W.w WHAT
".Tust run down and have the DENTS
drawit out. 1T will hurt awfully, ofcourse
hut You are n man and can stand it,
"Fn die irstr'
ooh, well, if You will permit your mag
~ination to make you believe that You have
~toothachc, don't blame me-
felt awfully sorry for him, for he sui
fered drcadfullv tor the next two DAYS
Then he suddenly decided to have thu
tooth pulled, and asked me, in a tone he
tried to make careless:
"Mrs. BOwscr. don't You want to q
down to the dentists with me?'
"Why, does yOur tooth still aChc?'
''Still ache, Great SCOTS, but it ha
never let up for an instant!'
81 am sorry you were so careless. Mel
never know how to take care of thel
health. Can't he Imagination, can it?'
He gave me a look of bOiler-plated re
proach, clapped onIhis hat and was of with
ont another word. lie returned in cOupl
of hours, and | knew from his general de
! meanor that he had been to the dentist
I and that the aching mOlar had come HON
in his pocket.
"Well, are you hetter?' ! queried.
"Better of what?'
r "Why, the toothache, Of course
Hump! Who's said anything abou
y nv having the toothache? Mrs. Bowser
, | don't want to believe that yOu drink
but your conduct for the last two or thre
i weeks has been strange very strange