davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
and Russian Petroleum.

The Pail Mall Gazette gives the fol-
lowing comparison Of American pc
troleum with that from the Russian
oil fields: Omitted States crude petro-
leum oil is to Russian crude as cream
to skim milk. United States crude
yields about IS per cent. Of the finest
Illuminating oil that the world pro-
duces. Russian crude yields only
about 20 per cent. of an inferior illu.
minating oil. United States crude
yields about IL per cent. naphtha or
spirit of such g. valuable character
that it readily sells for 20 per cent.
per gallon more than the oil. Russian
naphtha is unmarketable, and it is
mostly burned to get rid Of it. United
States lubricating oils, another prod
uct of crude, are now SO low in price
that Russian lubricating oils are pra--
tically debarred from competition in
many of the European markets. Unit
ed States crude yields a considerable
percentage of scale, used for candle
making, and this is product OF great
value; weight for weight it is worth four
times more than refined petroleum Gil.
The Baku crude yields no scale. Thus
the United States, in the SURPRISING
richness Of it's crude, has an enormous
and unapproachable advantage over
Russia"
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
A "BoOm" in the Holy Land.

Soap, as g. civilizlng agent, is having
great success in the Holy Land, it is
said. A large soap factory has been
established on the site of the ancient
Sachem, and the people are beginning
to use it on their persons instead OF
trying to eat it as they did at first.
Along with the introduction Of soap
other reforms are going on. Bethle-
hem has been rebuilt, and the streets
are lighted with gas. Cesarea is hav-
ing building boom. Nazareth is be-
coming the headquarters of big olive
oil spectators. Corner lots in Joppa
are going up with q rush, and real es-
tate in Mount Carmel is largely held
by spectators for an advance. The
ladies Of Jerusalem take all the Paris
ian fashion journals, and know all
about the latest styles OF hair dress
ing.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
WHAT 1T is TO BE FORTY.

To discover sprinkle of gray in your beard, :
And thInness of crop where the upland Is
cleared;
To note how you take to your slippers and gown,
And hug the fire when you get home from town
All, that's what it is to be forty.
TO find that your shadow has portlier grown,
That your voice has a practical, business ike
tone;
T hat your vision is tricky, which once was so
bright
All that's what it is to be forty.
A sleigh ride, party, a dance or a dlne,
Why of course you'll be present, you never de-
cline; ,
But alas, there's no invite you're not ''young
folss,' you see;
All, that's what it is to be forty.
A daughter that grows like lily, queen,
And that blooms like rose in garden ofgreen,
A dapper young clerk in an ice cream saloon,
Both dude and Ounce is to carry OH soon;
And boy that is ten, and the prlue OF your
eye,
Il caught smoking vile cigarettes on the sly
All, that's what il is to be forty.
At twenty man dreams ofpower and fame;
At thirty his fire has q somberer hame;
AT forty his dreams and his visions are o eT,
And he knows and he feels as he ne'er did be-
fore,
That man is fool till he's forty.
All, we're young and we're old, and were green
and we're gray,
Come, see the lone SCOT in the Valley of Tears,
Where your baby lies low in the cradle of years,
When no longer on earth he is forty.
-[Philadelphia Times.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
The Cook From Vassar.
From the Boston Record.

From the Boston Record.
One dav one OF the officers OF the
cooking school came to one OF the
teachers with rather splendid air,
saying:
You are to have new pupil to day,
q young friend of mine who graduated
last year from Vassar. She Is q very
accomplished young lady and ! think
you will find her valuable addition
to the class. She is az girl of quick COM
prehension and very bright"
The teacher bowed and prepared
herself for meeting q pupil who would
never get her measures wrong, nor ta1l
to see the niceties of all culinary phil
losophy. The first lesson of the Vas
sar girl, who was d pretty and we'll
bred young woman, WAS q demonstra-
tion lesson in meat cooking. she lis
tened to the opening remarks with In
terest. She "begged pardon" to ask,
"What is g. skewer?" and watched the
teacher with housewifely interest.
But presently. ''Now separate the fat
from the lean," said the cooking
teacher, and the other pupils began
the task. Poor Miss Vassar looked
at the meat before her in despair.
She had never observed it IN it's I'M
cooked state before. There was no
help for it.
II am so sorry" she said sweetly,
"but won't you please tell me which
is the fat and which the lean ?"
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
The Prince and the E'reemason Sign

While at Osborne, Prince Albert,
the late husband OF the queen, was in
the habit of getting up early and walk
ing about his farm. Passing g. farm
er's house he stopped to make some
inquiries, knocked at the door, and
asked the servant if his master were
In. The servant replied: "He is in,
but not down stairs" ooh, very
WE'LL" was Prince Albert's reply, and
he was about to leave. "Would you
be kind enough to leave your name:
sir" said the servant. "My master
would be angry if | did not tell him
who called" every well,'' said his
royal highness, you may say Prince
Albert" Upon which the man drew
back, looked up significantly, put his
thumb TO the tip OF his nose extend
ed his fingers, and exclaimed "Walk-
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13

bought by dealers. A family whose
history there e-dates the revolu.
tion recently came to this city from
Newburg and the grandmother, 80 rid
the new house of apparent incum-
brance, sold an old ragman case of
books and documents at their value
in weight as old paper. Among the
manuscripts were autograph letters
OF Gen. Washington, two or three OF
Aaron Burr's love letters and g. bun
die of documents invaluable to the
historian. Rare old books and dia-
ries went the way OF common country
weeklies and all the satisfaction the
appreciative Of the household has is
the knowledge that the old lady did it
for the heat
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
The False Lady and the True.

From the Boston Transcript.
Within two days the Listener wit
messed a couple of Incidents on Wash
ington Street which illustrated adj
mirably the difference there is in PEG.
pie. Passing along near the corner Of
Temple Place he saw two stout, elder
ly ladies, standing side by side-one
facing one way however. and the
other the other way, glaring at
each other with furious eyes. There
was q little grinning crowd about
them. and when the Listener came
quite up to them he saw what was the
matter In meeting and undertaking
to pass, the clothing of these two
elderly ladies had come in contact,
and a projecting button upon the
dress of one had caught in the lace on
the garments of the other. Their
strain to disentangle themselves had
drawn them into q regular snarl the
wra b Of each had been reused to
boiling point, and each woman
seemed to be exclaiming, in the Ian
guage OF the scripture, "Who shall de-
liver me from this body of death 20
Instead of leaving the disentangle-
ment to one of the two, to be man.
aged with elaboration and discretion,
each was tugging away spitefully at
the point of jointure. There seemed
to be likelihood Of an occasion for the
interference of the police present
ly, for the faces of the ladies
were growing redder and redder,
and their eyes swapping more and
more furiously. Presently one lady
gave q desperate tug; the lace gave
way and the tie was severed. But
imagine the feelings of the lady whose
lace had been lacerated!
Next day, passing over the same
ground, the Listener saw g. pretty girl,
brown eyed, rudy checked and short
haired, and g. stout lrishwOman In a
bonnet, q red and black shawl and a
green poplin dress, who were walking
in opposite directions, stop all at
once, caught fast, lust as the two wo-
men of the day before had been. The
young girl smiled family and good
naturally. The Irish woman took in
the situation and courtesyed.
"Sure, MISS" she said, can it's q
sign that we'll meet in heaven"
the young lady smiled more pro-
nouncedly and said
"Wait moment and l will unfast-
en- it,"
With half minutes work she Olsen.
tangled, the snarl.
"Ah, miss, remember it," said the
Irishwoman as she moved away, radi.
ant with smiles, "we're going to meet
in heaven, sure!"
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
Origin OF Hand-Shaking.
From the Rochester Post Express.

From the Rochester POSt-EXpresS.
In early and barbarous times, when
every savage or semi-savage was his
own law-giver, Judge, soldier, and po-
liceman, and had to watch over his
own safety, in default OF all other pro-
lection, when two friends or acquaint-
ances or two strangers desiring to be
friends or acquaintance, when they
CHANGED to meet, offered each to the
other the right hand alike of ofense and
defense, and the hand that yields the
sword, the dagger, the club, the toma-
hawk or other weapon of war. Each
did this to show that the hand was
empty, and that neither war nor
treachery was intended. A man can
not we'll stab another while he is en-
gagged in the act of shaking hands with
him, unless he is q double-dyed traitor
and villain and strives to aim q cow
ardly blow with the left while giving
the right, and pretending to be on
good terms with him.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
Silver on Their SOIes.

The workmen in Mexican silver
mines become so skillful in stealing
silver that owners employ detectives
to work with them. An owner tells
this story: "One day 81 detective
came to me and said when such and
such men came out, to examine their
sandals. / had that done. On the bot
toms of the sandals was what appeared
to be mud, but when it was scraped into
g. pan and worked I found that
it ran at the rate OF $4,000
to the ton. My miners had
plastered thin layer Of mud from
the mine over the leather, and then
sprinkled on the particles OF silver,
and over all had put another layer of
mud. They were working for 37115
cents a. day, and carrying out fifty
cents worth of silver on the sole of
each sandal.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
Another COlOred Outrage.

Omaha girl-"so you attend g. CO.
educational seminary. How do you
get along with the male students ?"
Eastern girl-"We torment them
awfully. We got the colored cook to
join our college society, and then when
we invited the boys into it, one blind
folded them, and during the ceremo.
MES they were given chances to hug
and kiss some one all they wanted to,
and after it was ali over we would tell
them that the colored cook was the
grand past venerable kissing clerk"
"What fun? Weren't they mad 2"
eyes, indeed. Pm SO sorry the soci-
ETY. went to pieces"
"Why, what happened?"
'The colored cook got mad and
wouldn't come to the invitations any
more. Then she went and told every
body we wouldn't give her any chance
at'all -
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
Breaking Down ana Building Up

When man breaks down in the matter OF
physical strength, the question OF its recovery
depends in great measure upon the length Of
time he allows to elapse before adopting medic
inal means to recuperate it, tonic which
gives speedy and powerful impulse to the
processes OF digestion and assimilation is the
best auxiliary he can employ, and he should
resort TO it promptly. The most reliable de-
pendence of the feeble, the aged, and the nerv-
has ever proved to be Hostetter's Stomach
Bitters an invigorant of national reputation
and proven worth, commended by medical men
of distinction, not only for building up a broken
down system, but as a remedy for dyspepsia,
constipation liver complaint, fever and ague,
and kidney trouble While not claimed to be q
panacea, it is most useful and comprehensive
household remedy. 1t is, moreover. eminently
safe as we'll as effective.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
The Girl ana Her CaSh.ROOk.
From the Albany Journal.

rIOM Tue A1uduy JOuIudl.
In q burst OF obviously misplaced
confidence a young lady just returned
from college yesterday confided to the
tourist one of the awful secrets Of her
sex-the true inwardness Of the femi-
nine account-book. "You see," she
said, 81 can't always remember ex-
actly what l have spent all my money
for, so just put down all the items [
can remember and then charge the
deficit to postage-stamps. Mamma
often wonders what l can possibly do
with all the stamps | buy, for she
knows l haven't such a dreadful list Of
correspondents. OF course" she
went on, with truly lnexplicable
look of conscious prevarication, 81
don't write to anybody mamma
doesn't know about" "Of course"
assented the tourist. "And you see,"
continued the fair Vaccarite, "when
she looks over my assounts and sees
25 cents charged for missionary fund,
10 cents for lead pencils, so cents for
caramels, and two dollars for post
age-stamps, she thinks it's kind OF
funny" "Quite ludicrous, no doubt, +"
echoed the tourist.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
American Surgeons Ahead.
From the St. Louis Globe-Democrat.

From the ST. Louis Globe Democrat.
In medicine the physicians of Europe
are far ahead of their American breth-
rem, but in surgery America leads the
world. I will tel you why this coun-
try is,behlnd Europein medical science.
The medical men of Europe have all
the advantages of practice in military
and other hospitals; coupled with
this they havethe experience of trained
nurses. Their orders are always
obeyed to the letter, and the nurses
never fail to watch closely any exper-
iments that may be made on g. pa
tient. American physicians do not
have the same privileges of making
experiments which the European doc
tors possess, and we never get the
trained nurses in this country so nee
essary in aiding g. physician.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
The Poor People Are Patient.


EIUA LHC EpUCII.
Bavaria has bad luck with her kings.
The late King Ludwig became insane
and committed suicide, and his sue
cessor, King Otto, is SO dangerously
demented that four physicians take
turn in constantly guarding him. His
favorite amusement is shooting peas
ant boys. To humor this hobby he is
kept supplied with rifles loaded with
powder only. Presently a boy crosses
the road, the king shoots, the boy
drops, and is carried away by excited
individuals who have accidentally"
witnessed the scene. Needless to say
the boy is unhurt, and gets 5 cents for
his trouble.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
PORTRAIT Of GIN. GRANT


When Gen Grant, with a heroism
greater than that exhibited at Donelson,
Vicksburg or the Wilderness, lay dying
in his cottage in the Adirondacs, we gave
an order to celebrated French artist to
make for us Photographic portrait re-
CARELESS of expense, after the last cele-
brated photograph by Bogardus, as gift
to the readers Of the WISCONSIN. 1t is
printed on plate paper 19x24 inches, and
conceded to be the best ever made Of
Gen. Grant. The trade price is $1OO.
/. The WEEKLY WISCONSIN is the most
widely circulated family paper in the
Northwest. In order that everybody in
the United States may see it, and at the
same time become possessed of this
truly celebrated portrait, we offer to
close out the last edition free. Any per-
son sending us % cents may receive this
portrait carefully mailed, FREE, together
with the WEEKLY WISCONSIN for ten
weeks. Address
CRAMER, AIKENS & CRAMER,
Milwaukee. Wis
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
Old Book Stores.
From the New York Times.

From the New YORK Times.
Old book stores are increasing in
number, and all seem to be thriving.
Some OF them employ agents, who
ransack towns within radius OF 100
miles of the metropolis, and very Of
ten with rich results. Many an an
Gent cockloft in a country house is
searched at their instance, and some
times paper or book of some great
value is dis overed and secured at
a ridiculously low figure. Old news
papers, engravings, political car
toons, almanacs and bound volumes
OF records and public documents are
constantly turning up and are eagerly
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
Can't See the Hjoke.
From the Waterbury American.

fTOm the waterbury AmeTlcan.
The newspaper funny men by start
ing the yarn that Prof. Hiorth
Boyesen gets $4,000 g. year from a
prominent publishing firm for the use
OF the ''j's" in his name, with which
they misspell it, have brought down
upon him an avalanch of letters from
an army OF unsupported relatives,
asking for assistance from him. This
may seem funny to most people, but
it does not strike Prof. Boyesen that
way. He claims that the Americans
are utterly lacking in sense OF
humor, and would like to drive the
alleged joke home into the head OF it's
originator if he could only catch him.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
A Good Mule Story.
From the Savannah News.

A few days ago a mule belonging to
J. B. Scott, Of Americus, stretched
himself on the ground and, to all ap-
pearances, died. A chain was put
around the animals neck and he was
dragged two miles to the woods and
left to the care of the buzzards. Next
morning Mr.. Scott was astonished to
find the dead mule alive and cheerful,
standing at the lot gate waiting to be
fed.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13

A WASHINGTON tobacconist who has
had the Woman's Christian Temperance
Union after him for displaying in his
windows pictures of scantily dressed
actresses, now dresses his scantily-clad
works of art in little skirts of tissue
paper. From the smallest to the larg-
est figure they are all clad in white and
pink and blue skirts of tissue paper.
gathered at the waist and pasted over
the figure from the bust to the ankles.
The effect is startling.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13

For dyspepsia, Indigestion, depression OF
spirits and general debility, in their various
forms, also as preventative against fever
and ague and other intermittent fevers, the
"Ferro-Phosphorate Elixir OF Calisaya,"
made by Hazard, Hazard & Co., New York,
and sold by all druggists, is the best tonic;
and for patients recovering from fever or
other sickness it has no equal.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
Woman and Her Diseases

is the title of large illustrated treatise, by
DR.. R. V. Pierce, Buffalo, N. Y, sent to any
address for ten cents in stamps. 1t teaches
successful self-treatment.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13

ASK your shoe and hardware dealers for
Lyons Heel Sttfeners; they keep boots and
shoes straight.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13

If afflicted with Sore Eyes, use DR.. Isaac
Thompson s Eye Water. Druggists sellit. 25.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13

THE bicycle law of Oregon requires BIZ
cycle riders to stop 100 yards from any
person going in the opposite direction
with a team, and remain stationery I'M
til the team has passed
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13

PATRICK MURRAY, Sexton St. Patrick's
Cemetery, Baltimore, Nd, was poisoned
by poison oak. and was promptly cured
by st. Jacobs Oil. Sold by Druggists and
T1aa1arS
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13

A COUPLE recently married at Santa
Rosa, Cal, bore the same family name,
were both the same age, and their birth
DAYS came on the same date.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13

RELIEF is immediate, and cure sure
Piso's Remedy for Catarrh. so cents.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13

The author OF new book says: Even
when the simmering heats of lnidsum-
mer make the lower strata of the atmos-
phere tremulous with their passion,
the drowsiness which steals over one
who is free from the irksomeness of
labor under the hot sun is crowded with
rare dreams and fancies." This is Just
the weather to apply the principle, for
if heat doesn't simmer now it will be
difficult to find the season of its passion.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13

UNLIKE other cathartics, DIR. Pierce's opel
lets" do not render the bowels costive after
operation but, on the contrary, establish a
permanently healthy action. Being entirely
Vegetable no particular care is required while
using them Bv DRUGGISTS
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13

Nix. ". Il. -tiC-,LIoIEk, .Iallager racine
Coast Agency Star Tobacco, 206 Front
Street, San Francisco, Cal, writes: Il
used one bottle of St. Jacobs Oil for
rheumatism in muscles of arm and Shout
der. 1t gave immediate and permanent
relief. A member of my family was
cured in the same Wav."
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13

THE fremen of Brooklyn are made
happy by Gov. Hills signature to the
act increasing their salaries to 5000,
81 700 and 81. 200 for the different grades
of the service
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1887-07-13
i. g.ofrt SIOnaI Etiquette

prevents some doctors from advertising theil
skill, but we are bound by no such conven
tional rules and think that if we make dis
covery that is of benefit to our fellows, we
ought to spread the fact to the whole land
Therefore we cause to be published through
out the land the fact that DR.. r. v Pierce's
Golden Medical Discovery" is the bes
the lungs and kindred diseases. Send Il
cents in stamps for Dr. Pierce's complete
treatise on consumption, with unsurpassed
means of self-treatment Address, Worlds
Dispensary Medical Association, 663 Mair
Street, Buffalo, n Y.
Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1887-07-23
A Warm Climate.

Apropos of "The Man from yuma"
published in the INDEPENDENT recently,
the Bradford Era says:
This weather is favorable for tho re-
vival Of the story Of the man from Fort
Yuma, Arizona, supposed to be the
hottest place IN the United States. It's
a tough town, and when the wickedest
man in it passed. away everyone said he
was going TO a hotter Ilace thon Fort
Yuma, The nsxt night, however, tho
ghost Of the departed returned, wikh
Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1887-07-23
The Asylum investigation.

The Gazette learns from Carsonite
just arrived in town that the testimony
given during tine investigation of the
ch"rges of cruelty, iucompetency, etc.,
against DR.. Bishop as Superintendent
OF the Nevada Insane Asylum, has been
printed and sent to San Francisco to be
bound, and will he ready for distri-
button III ii few days. The number of
copies printed was net learned. - Reno
Gazette.
Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1887-07-23
California Cat-R Cure.

Tho only guaranteed cure for catarrh, cold in
the hend, hny fsveS. roSc cold, catarrhal d,at-
ness and sore Dyes. Restores the sense Of
taste aud unplcarantnesr OF breath. resulting
from cAtarrl. Easy and pleasant to use. Fol-
low dIrocipps aud = cure 10 warranted, by all
druggists Send for circular TO ABlETINE
MEDICAL COMPANY. oroville. Cal. Sic
months" treatment for 81; sent by mail, 81 10.
or sala by +. r. MULLER.