The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1887-11-16
THE FORTUNES OF WAR.
OR

THE Fed or THE CALLAHAN-oGRADY.
Bridget Callahan and Norah O'Grady
met at a tish-stall in the Sixteenth Street
Market and. as luck would have it, each
fixed her fancy upon particularly large
and handsome founder which lay upon
the sIimy marble slab. The two women
had come up to the stall at about the
same moment. Ii Was not Bridget Gala
hans fault that the dealer, a dark skinned
Italian with sleepy black eyes, happened
TO see her first, but the o'Grady chose to
think so and abused her roundly, while
the Italian rolled up the fish in piece of
coarse brown paper, counted out his Gus
TONER'S change, and bowed his thanks.
The tide of Intellectual wrath which is
sued from Mrs 0'Grady's lips surprised
no one accustomed to the place. 1t SEEM
ed rather to delight its object. Norah
O'Grady was a small woman, stout and
firm set as an ale bottle, with rather
long neck and small head, which was
on this occasion crowned with sailor
hat belonging to her little daughter, pre-
sumably snatched up by mistake in her
haste to get out for her daily marketing
Mrs Callahan, on the other hand, was of
generous proportions, with a large, fat
face, and serene blue eyes that could be
savage enough upon occasion. And she
was gorgeously arrayed, wearing brill
liant Paisley shawl with fiery red cen
TIRE, a vaunt of social superiority which
she had waved before Mrs. OGrady for
years.
They met again at the door of he mar
ket, and assailed each other with mutu1
al storm Of invective, for which the fish
acted as an excuse.
Both knew that there would be no
g making up" or taking back" The
day for reconciliation was long gone by.
Just when this crisis had passed it would
be difficult to say. Whether it occurred
on the day, some ten years gone by, that
the two families first took up their abode
in cottages side by side, and Mrs. Gala
hans Tim threw dead cat at Mrs.
O'tirldy, and Mrs. O'tirady retaliated by
crushing pane of glass in the Callahan
domicile in her efforts TO punish the cul-
prit, and Mrs. Callahan appeared upon
the scene hot and red, and covered with
H., f,,r,, b...,f.r,, ,..,,at aud ,.1oat-a,t 70
take the carpet stick to Mrs. O'tirady, 70
her own discontinue whether these
small beginnings, which were liable to
occur in any famiiesof the Callahan and
O'Grady circle, formed the animus and
incentive to after hostilities, who can say
Certain it is that the war had been kept
up with undated yigor ever since. There
* certain convenience IN quarreling
over a back fence, which people who
have had to nurse their wrath at a dis
tance will readily appreciate. Anger has
no chance TO cool. as when time and dis
tanre intervene Over the COOK stove,
1t the wash tub, ironing, sweeping, scrub
bing, rocking their babies, the voices of
each could penetrate the others domi-
cile. Ii is needless to say that they made
free use of their opportunities. If there
was an opprobrious epithet in the vocab-
ulary of billingsgate practiced in Goats
Hollow-that choice quarter of San Fran
cisco where both had the honor to claim
residence-which they had not at some
time flung at each other during their in
tercourse together, both would have
YOU to make it known that they
might at once atone for the deficiency
They had resorted to every expedient to
prove their genuine neighborly feeling.
When Mrs Callahan hung her washing
over the back fence. Mrs. OGradv sprin-
kled it literally with dish water. The
soil in both back yar'is was generally
mulched with broken crockery, old bot
ties. bustles, corset steeis, battered tin
cans, and other neighborly courtesies
which had been exchanged over this
convenient back fence.
In some ways this fend had been of
great benefit TO both families. Ii had
served as sort of safety valve for the
conflicting emotions which often disturb
the peace of household How much
bodily fatigue and parental irritation the
two mothers had worked off on ach other
will probably never be known. With
Youngsters proximate estimate of the
exact amount Of yicionsness spared their
own flesh and blood might easily be
made. When Tim Callahan was spank
ed by his mother, he Immediately cuffed
young 0'Grady When Annie 0'Grady
was denied a new frock, she made faces
at Tim Callahan. The little Galatians
and O'Gradvs SPARED and scratched and
bit and stoned each other with promiscu-
Gus zeal.
For tim the heads of the two fami-
lies abstained from any active participa-
ton in the general scrimmage, looking
with dignifed indulgence upon the
clashings Of the two weaker vessels. Lit
tie by little they were drawn into the
conflict Some depresistions of more