The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1886-10-14

Anu arm OuTSelNtS loT tno stei hel iidys
Pleasure pursuing
But leads to ruin
80 away with shadows, away, away.
Hal Berte in Detroit Free Press.
A Modest Mans Adventure.
If there is one thing in this world that
I hate more than another it is an even
ing party, whether it take the form of
tea, music, and twaddlc, or come in the
more awkward guise of a regular dance.
Unfortunately, l am short and ill-fa-
vored. Indeed, can well remember
even now the rage and grief which pos
scssed my youthful mind when I discov-
cred that l was called "The Toad" by
my school companions, and how that our
old coachman, who was my ally and
confdant in those days, could find no
better words of consolation than ''Nevcr
you mind, Master Jack you let 'em talk,
a pack of young impertinences. What
I say is handsome is as 'andsome does"
Time has but accentuated my many
personal defects, of which am painfully
conscious, and the result is that am
shy gauchc and nervous in society.
One fell and dreadful day (mark it, o
Time, with the blackcst letter in thy
calendaD l was invited by my cousins to
esquire them to dancing party at South
Kensington. I made feeble excuses;
they were overruled. I appealed to my
respected mother; alas she thinks only
need bringing out to become an enter
.aining ornament to society.
Well, l gave in. What would you
have me to do? Ugly as I am, 1 can't
help seeing that Kate is most pleasing
person. find it difficult to say "No"
to any one, and an impossibility in the
case of this lovely cousin of mine.
Kate and Millicent are what are called
"fine girls" and lam not sure that l
did not catch the ghost of n grin upon
the long list of funky faces in the hall
as stumbled along in my tight boots,
with Kate on my right arm and Mill
cent on my left, and both of them talk
ing to one another over my head, alas!
The ballroom was q long oblong, and
opposite to the end where the musicians
were stationed there was kind of al
cove or bay window, in which was
placed one of those large circular otto
mans which have cushioned seat all
round, and ON top Of the lounge re-
ceptacle which is filled with foliage,
plants and dropping ferns. Now, could
anything be more enticing to man of
my retiring disposition9 If could only
get behind that happy ottoman, behold
me blissfully concealed until the gen
eral move to supper should drag me
from my resting place. Fortune favored
me for once. But just as l was begin
ming to realize the pleasantness of my
seclusion and the relief from the shy
ness which assails me in public I felt a
most depressing sleepincss creeping over
me-
must have slept soundly for some
time, but at last, suddenly, and with a
startled and chilly feeling, l awoke.
Confused at first l could not imagine
where was or how my ordinary sleeping
attire had become changed into the claw
hammer coat and other male habiliments
of evening society. However, as l crept
round the ottoman, and pcering out from
my corner, saw wide stretch of white
floor cloth, dimly lighted, before me, and
marked the music stands at the other
end of the room, the dreadful truth
burst in upon me; they had all gone
down to supper. Now in my purturba-
ton at the prospect of going to the abom-
Unable dancing party had been unable
to attack my dinner with my usual
robust appetite was therefore, raven
ously hungry. Moved by a desire to eat
and drink at whatever cost to my con-
stitutional modesty, and agonized at the
fear lest the supper should be over and
the debris thereof cleared away before
could obtain what began to want with
an increasing craving, it struck me that
it would be quite possible for me to
glide into the supper-room among the
servants, who would be constantly going
in and coming out.
/ slipped quietly down the stairs, and
soon found myself close to them. Now
was my opportunity, and was just go.
ing to seize it, when fend in human
shape, waiter in evening dress, pushed
huge dish of Strawberries into nv
hands, saying in that unpronounceable
cockney twang, "now then Swaney, (my
mother calls my hair auburn) look alivei
Take those yere strawberries round
and mind you don't spill 'em."
Not single minutes time was given
me for expostulation or explanation
other walters were pushing on behind
and before could gather my scattered
wits l found myself in the brilliantly
lighted supper room, among the hired
walters, and with an enormous dish o.
fruit in my hands. What was l to do
l had not moment to decide. The
horror of being seen in such too-ridic-
culous position terrified me, and found
myself handing round the fruit, with
waiter following me with cream and
, sugar. Imagine the awful state of my
mind when / approached my cousins
They were close together. separated onl.
by the partner of one of them. could