Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-12-21
BRIGHT BITS.
short. sir ?

Customer-Well, yes, | an. just put 1t
down on the slate, will you Much obliged
TO you for speaking of it.-LoaoeU Citisen.
SMALL BoY-Grandpa, don't you think
Maggie might do what want her to do
Grandpa-Yes, dear. What do you want
nurse TO do
Small Boy-I want her to kiss you, grandpa.
Life.
SMITH with effusion Hello, Brown, is that
you heard you were drowned,
Brown with sadness)-No, it was my
brother.
smi tthoughtlessly, -What pity Wash
t1a0tot critic.
OMAHA MIss-Mamma, may 1 read the
paper to- daYs
Mammal have not looked it over yet.
when will your"
Il don't know. dear am very busy. You
can read 1t If you'll promise to skip all ar
tlcles about lords and ladies. O0saAa World.
PRETTY WATER GIRL ito regular boarder)
Charley?
Charley lin a fascinating manner)-Wel =,
WEAKLY. hardly know, yknow. What kind
would you advise me to take, jennie?
Pretty walters girl Gnn0centy) Noodle
soup, Charley.-Aeao YOrb Sun.
1T must be awful provoking to the men"
sa'd one OF TWO ladies tripping along Fourth
street.
HOY sop inquired her companion.
II mean when they pass a window mirror
on one side of the street and q handsome
woman on the other. They want to look at
themselves in the mirror and see the lady at
the same time. ~ CincinnGh Sun.
TRAMP ITO gentleman in City Hall Park
VIII! you kindly allow me to glance at your
paper Tor moment. sir? | am anxious to see
The weather pred ctions.
Gentleman thanding him the paper)-Cer-
tanly. Are you interested in the weather.
Tramp es, sir. / live principally on
wind and l want to find out what I'm to have
for dinner to-day.-Pitts5urg DISPATCH.
WHAT have we here A respectable lady
desires to purchase a parrot to amuse her.
my docs she recoil in horror? 1t is because
the parrot has JUST said something very I'M
proper. Why does the parrot use vulgar
an uaGe 1t is because the bird dealer has
unthlnk lngly discussed the evidence In the
Lady Colin divorce suit in the presence of the
bird. Will the bird dealer succeed in selling
the parrot to the ladV? GU bet he VIII, for
that ia the kind of talk she wants to hear
Teas SLiin0S.
AN elderly lady, Mrs. Samuelson, was
rescued from 4 dreadful fate at the Austin
depo. OF the International, Iron Mountain
ana Great Northern railroad. She was stand
ing on the track. aud did not pc receive he ap-
pr ach of the $3.50 o'clock south-bouud train.
AT the risk of his life, Sam Johnsing, cOlored
pay, dashed forward and rescued Mrs Samu-
elson from being crushed to death by the pom
| ierous locomotive \ 5 soon as Mrs. Samuel
son regalnet her cOmposure, she said to her
rescuer: "Iil tell my SON in law TO see that
coiored boy turned as pale as ashes, and fall
ing on his knees, said: "For de Lawd's sake,
dont say muffin to de Kunnel about nv savin'
lie life OF his murder in-laW-or he will W. ar
me out wild a stick. "-TerdS Strings.
A HALF DOZEN spools of thread.
sea.skin muff and cane.
Ten yards OF We vet-Turkey red,
And sev'ral miles OF tape.
Some twenty yards of grenadine,
And hooks and eyes ga ore,
A yard or two of b0mbazine
And buttons by the score.
Some rouge to paint the pretty face,
Home powder for her nose,
And gloves To lit her hands with grace,
And costly silFen hose.
| Some stockings of polka dot,
| Some stockings striped and PLAIN.
| Some laces for-the Lord knows what,
Some white, rome back, from Spain.
Some hairpins, slippers. and hat,
| Which has lofty dome,
| These, amt purse extremely fat
| Has Mabel carried home.
The while her hubby q deplore
| His fate though ia sublme)
| DOH foot it to and from the store
| Each day to save dime.
The Ram6Jer,