St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1886-11-28

are LIE hIllu WIZ HpOhO NiAOAA 'NNN
tions as book agents, and with the per-
suasive logic and psurmountable cheek
tins obtained, come back again to the ~"
prepared to dispute with any of the faculty
the correctness Of their view of the whole
range of science. They take great pride In
escorting strangers all over the campus and
buildings. and incidentally mention the vast
requirements in all manner of learning.
They cultivate intellectual attitudes, and
try by svmmetrically posing their feet to
throw their large heads into greater promi-
nence. 4 stranger would take them Tor
seniors, but a student passes them with an
amused smile and thinks of the time when
he too was fresh.
-
In contrast to these are the dude fresh
men. A study of mental philosophy, with
its teachings of the unattainableneSS of in
finity by the human mind, has not yet
stopped their mad attempt to reach the sun
with their collars, and not yet being ac-
Quainted with the physical law, that no
two things can occupy the same place at
the same time. they endeavOr to make their
trousers and skin coaleSce. He poses in
the hall. and gracefully supports the side
of the building while an admiTing chorus
at least he imagines it so-of OhS and abs
are uttered by awesIruck behOlders. He
does not go in for brains. for he has none.
but he wishes to graduate thinking his
toilet is not quite complete without sheep
skin.
~
Our attention is next attracted, and pow
erfully attracted by the hayseed freshman.
who comes TO college that he may prepare
to teach the school of the district in which
he lives. To him the main building is the
largest structure possible to be produced by
man. and Regents folly" across the
Manitoba track, something even more grand
III his imagination than its famous Roman
predecessor, which at the present time is
like it in usefulness. is simply immense. 1t
is this class who worry the life out of the
registrar, and are highly incensed ana in
suited that a diploma from the academy at
WayDack, which certi6es that they have
successfully prosecuted their researches IN
reading, 'riting and 'rthmetic, will not ad-
NIT them to the sophomore class.
The hayseed student is dude after his
fashion. He carefully pOises his SLOUGH
hat on the side Of his head. inclined toward
the left eye, OF if the day is chilly, he dons
a straw one, and saunters up the university
path. his lower limbs incased in trousers
two sizes too large, in which are prominent
creases. These creases he carefully pre-
serves, to show that the unmentionables are
new and bought at store.
We may also mention the literary fresh
man. who aims on graduating to be De-
mOsthenes or Pitt, who boreS his friends
and fellow members of the societies by
long harangues, with no settled purpose but
an indefinite longing to spread himself. To
this class of young men the literary and
debating societies owe their existence. but
as each takes his turn at spOuting, in these,
at least, he can be tolerated.
-
If freshman studies hard. passes his
examinations and does not get suspended,
which several of them have been last term,
he becomes at the beginning of his second
year a sophomore, and well he justifes his
name for a wiser fool never existed. Take
for instance a certain sophomore journal
istically inclined, who calmly surveys his
fellow mortals and judges himself greatest