The Austin weekly statesman. (Austin, Tex.) 1883-1898, 1886-02-25
HOSTESS ANDG GUEST.

New lork Commercial Advertiser.
"What are the reciprocal obligations of
hostess and guest?" is question often
asked. The replies are as varied as are
the natures of individuals. One says:
"Your time must be wholly given up to
guest who remains at night under your
roof. If necessary the order of the house
hold even must be set aside to provide en-
tertainment In short, guest should be
regarded as a necessary evil as far as in
terruption to the even tenor of the way of
the household is concerned"
Another says: "The guest visits you to
entertain you; she must pay for her
place. and she must take you as she finds
you; she is visiting you, and must
not do anything else. The fash
ion some women have of Wis
iting friend in the city, and then going
out whenever they like to call upon
acquaintances, seems to me like making a
convenience of the hostess. If friend
came to spend week with me, and from
my house went to spend day with an
other friend whom | did not know,
should consider her rude, and should not
invite her soon again."
These two views are the extremes, but
the truth lies in the golden mean. 1t is,
of course, compliment to a person to in
vite her for a longer or shorter time.
But the visitor is not necessarily an
obliged party, nor is she comforting an
obligation. The English custom of
giving the guest perfect liberty of
action does not obtain here to any great
degree; the appointment of our houses,
as rule, not being adapted to this mode
of entertainment. If guest from the
country visits us, we should certainly as
certain whether she desires to visit friends
who cannot entertain her over night 1t
would. however, be great discourtesy
should guest make her entertainers
house place of convenience whence she
may go and spend days at time, return
ing when it seems to her proper. 1t is
impossible to conceive of well-bred per
sons committing so great a breach OF
good manners, and yet l have known this
to be done by persons who consider them.
selves well-bred.
An equally discourteous proceeding on
the part of the hostess has come under my
observation, where guest said she woulG
like to spend day with one of her dear
friends, who lived long distance from
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by rail from the house at which she was
visiting. She was, however, given so
plainly to understand that she was Wis
iting, and that her time belonged to her
hostess, that she did not make the pro-
posed visit, and returned home with new
ideas of entertainment.
When friend from the country is in
vited for long visit find out what she
would like to do; whether there are friends
to be visited and shopping to be done
and plan these matters at the beginning
of the visit, so that the arrangement of
time may be satisfactorily made. The
pleasure of the visit will then be appre-
ciated by hostess and guest. 1t is very
inconsiderate to invite guests in winter
unless you are sure that you can make
them as comfortable as they would be al
home. Find out whether they prefer
warm or cold bedrooms and arrange &C
cordingly. This is an elementary prin.
ciple of hospitality which is, however, too
often disregarded.