The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-03-05
NATIONAL coRN.FlELo.
The Omcial Chiropodist Who Has Charge
Of Congressional COrns.

The Omeial Chiropodlst VINO Has Ch.fE>
Of Congressional COrns.
The gas is always burning dimly II
the bathrooms of the House, and Rob
ert's eyes are almost gone. Robert is
The colorcd man who has for q long
time been in charge of the baths. VIII.
liam is his assistant. He is younger
than Robert, and the dimncss of the
light doesn't affect the kcenness of his
bright :::::.tle black eyes, and he is well
suited for the duties he has to perform.
He trims the Congressmen's corns.
William is rather bright mulatto. and
very spry. Robert is darker in color,
has chin whiskevs, and looks rather
sedate with Eyeglasses on. But the
glasses don't help him much; he has to
take them off to rest his eyes, and he
can't see much with them.
The House bathrooms are in the
basement of the Capitol, in the south.
east corner, under the elevator, where
the light of day never reaches. Tho
gas, like Roberts eyes, is very dim, and
can not reach very far.
'.Is you the gentleman that wanted
his cOrns trimmed?" asked William. as
the reporter passed down the dim,
vaulted corridor.
want Q nice BATH" said Robert.
throwing couple of towels over his
arm. and taking off his glasses, SO rs to
get better look at the reporter.
'Why. do you have a chiropodist
here?' asked the scribe, in surprise.
That's me, said William. That's
what am"
That's him." echoed Robert. Then
he added: ''Ie's u mighty clever hand
Mt it. I've seen him take corn rs big
as my thumb nail out ov member 5
foot and never draw the red. Some Ov
the members have mighty big corns.
He's mighty clever bout it. If you've
got any corns you'd better let him get
hOr ov EN-"
While his praises were being thus
sung William stood modestly by, whet-
ting an Odd-shapcd knife on tho palm
of his hand.
Il used to be little clever in that
line myself" continued Robert. us
cut the cOrns Of lots of the members,
but my eyes got too bad now on ac-
count of that gas, an I can't see to do
it. That gas is mighty bad on the eyes.
and It takes bright ones like his to see
to cut corns and not draw bOOd."
"Do many of the Congressman have
corns?" asked the reporter, conscious
that he had made discovery. This is
q new field of study"
''YQu mean the corn-field? Yes, sir;
that IS big field Of labor" replied
William, seriously, unconscious of his
very bad pun. ..Most all of them has
corns. Some of 'em has pretty bad
ones. There's MIR. -" then he
stopped hirHself suddenly and added, II
his name. but he's got aw-
full bad feet. Is got most of those who
has been in Congress long time in
pretty good trim. Some of them. when
they first come in, are mighty hard to
handle. Their fect's in bad condition.
With the ingrowing nails, and bunions
they has a pretty hard time. 1t ain't
those city gentlemen with tight shoes
that has the bad feet. It's them that
hasn't had no one to tend to 'em. Why.
there's -, but, as l was saying, l
mostly disremember their names. How
sOmever there amt many that don't
have corns. and most of 'em are bad.
That gentleman whose name l Just
didn't know had the most curious corn,
l ever saw. He couldn't scarcely walk
about. It was great big fellow just
under his great toe nail, but / got him
OUT
'.Arc you paid by Congress especially
to take care of the members fect?"
asked the scribe.
"Not exactly for that. Robert is in
charge of the bath and I'm his assistant;
the rest is thrown in by me as sort of
extra, and if the members want to give
me something for it they can. They
mostly do, though never charge any
thing. They're mighty glad to get rid
of big corn, and they amt slow about
giving me something Washington
Star.