The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1886-08-25
BRIC-A-BRiC.

The past week has been the hottest of the
season.
A suit of armor was the old.fashioned
Knight dress
In few moro weeks the fall business will
open up lively,
Old Sol is hand and glove these days
with the resort proprictors.
Umbrellas have Il widespread popularity.
The man who borrows trouble is never
able to pay it back. Remember this.
The fool and his money are soon parted
but this is not true of the fool and his hair.
The school boys Of the oldcn time used
to know something about the "switchman's
strike"
Halifax is to have Il steel railway.-JOW'
nal, There arc several steal railways in
this country.
Love is that golden latch key which
hangs on the outside, and lets in happiness
to every heart.
by actual count it has been aSccrtaincd
that a man can shoe a horse quicker than u
woman can shoe n hen.
Sixty thousand cards are used in the
Brooklyn Library.-Er. ~ new pack for
every game, we suppose.
Its a wifc's duty TO he pleasant, says
an exchange. Yes, and it's the husbands
duty to make her duty easy.
Hotel Turtle is the name of a Dakota
hotel, and we presume the people who stop
there find the motto to be, Shell out"
Actors are too much given TO quarrclinr,
considering that it is n part of their bust,
ness to kiss and make up"
a Buffalo girl never has her wedding
dress made in that city, for fear some one
will say she was married in n buffalo robe.
I'VE want q circus, and VIC want ii bad"
cNclaims n Western editor. We should
think he would want a good one while he
was wanting.
y lady whose husband INDUCES more or
less ut the club, says he is Il kind but in
dulging husband.
There is a place in Pennsylvania called
Economy. 1t is not a summer resort.
New England ice cream must be made
for export to Canada. 1t kills at shorter
range than Jersey lightning.
Cincinnati has discharged two policemen
for inability to read and write They
should be eligible for jury duty.
II know what the nights of labor arc,
said the mother Of six boys us she sat down
to repair the pile of trousers and jackets.
1t is one Of the easiest things in the world
to make n blundcr, but how hard I: is
sometimes to repair one.
Gath scntcntiously says that though the
great rcformcr died The great purlOincr still
pcrpctuates himself.
who drank the first iulcp? Why, Ncb,
uchadnczzar. He was the first man who
ever mixed grass with his liquor.
Only four months before Congress will
assemble again, but the 10th can only last
till March 4th, which is some consolation.
There is nothing a certain class of men
Will not forgive, If yOu will accept their
views; and nothing they will forgive, if
you do not.
Some one remarks that "lacc is what ruff.
flies the men nowadays But he is wrong.
Lace rutllcs the women as usual. Iii pay.
ing for it that rutiicS the men.
Women drink liquor" says a writer,
and yet they never see snakes" Guess
you haven't posted yourself far enough
back. Did you ever hear of Eve?
Home again Not dead nor injured!
You even smile, Is it-can it he true
Thus spoke the umpirc's wife. 10 be con.
tinucd.
a Connecticut editor called the local
court the Lime Kiln Club, and was prompt.
ly fined S5.51. About six jokes per week
AT that rate would bankrupt most Connect.
cut editors.
Elizabeth Rose Cleveland says. An
acorn in tic mind is worth a forest on the
end Of the tongue But, dear Elizabeth.
neither is the object of such tender care as
acorn on n pet toe.
The man who invented the chestnut
alarm'-a little bell to carry concealed.
and to ring when a stale joke is told-musl
have had Tennyson's line in mind: Ring
out the old, ring in the new"
They were speaking of a young lady
who sings beautifully, and one of the party
asked: is She n mczzo soprano?' NO.
| guess not; | think she is Swcdc," was
the innocent reply of a high school girl.