davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23
FOR SALE.

Berries, Plants and Vegetables in their
season, namely, Strawberry, Raspberry,
Tomato, Cabbage and Celery, at Glendale
garden, one mile South of Kenosha.
A. G. WARRINER, Proprietor.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23
CIRCUIT COURT FOR KENosHA COUNT

CIRCUIT COURT FOR KENOSHA COUNTY.
Perrin Washburn, plaintiff, against Jeanette WASH
burn, defendant
The State Of Wisconsin to the said defendant.
You are hereby summoned to appear within twenty
days after service of this summons exclusive of the
day of SERVICE and defend the above entitled action
in the court aforesaid and in case of your failure
80 to do, judgement will be rendered against
you according to ths demand of the complaint, of
which copy is herewith served upon you.
JAMES CAVANAGH,
Plaintiffs Attorney.
P. o. Address, Kenosha. Kenosha County, Wis.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23
KENoSHA COUNTY coURT-IN PROBATE.
NOTICE TO CREDITORS.

In the matter of the estate of Louisa Brown,
deceased.
Notice is hereby given that the claims and
demands OF all persons against Louisa Brown,
deceased, late of the city of Kenosha, in said
county of Ken0Sha, will be received, examined
and adjusted by the County Court of Kenosha
county at the regular terms of said court to be
Kenosha, in and for said county, on the first
Tuesday of June, A. u. 1886, and on the first
Tuesday of October, A. D. 1886, at 10 O'Clock A.
after the fifteenth day Of April, A. D. 1886. is the
time allowed and limited for creditors OF said
Louisa Brown, deceased, to present their claims
for examination and allowance
Dated at Kenosha, the fifteenth day OF April,
A. D. 1885.
By the Court.
ANTHONY VAN WICK,
County Judge.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23
NJ 4 sT pAOI RAILWAY

C.M, 4 ST. PAOL RAILWAY.
Time Of trains OH @. NJ. & st. P. BY. at Ranney,
formerly Ken0sha Crossing:
Going ROrth-l2H 4. NJ, 947 A. NJ, l.25 p. NJ,
$50 p. N. $50 PM.
Sunday, Horth--1.25 p. NJ.
Going South-5.O2 A. NJ. s.s5 a. NJ, IL noon,
2.0I P. NJ, 6.09P.M.
Sunday, South-l2 noon
T. L. CARPENTER. Agent.
Trains leave SomsrA ~ follows:
Going North--10 A. M. and 7.01 P. NJ.
Going South--8.M A. Nj. and 5P. NJ.
Trains leave TruesdtlI As follows:
Going North-9 80 A. NJ. and 6.52 Pm.
Going South-8. 33 A. NJ and 5.O7 P. M.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23
Washington Island.
To.An,& 1Inr1- # aan =
Third Ward.

Durkee's Eastern Addition.
Mrs. Louise Dickey-Lot T. block 2, W "a sec 5, /,
%.
Thomas Filburn-Lot le. block 2, n W a sec 5, ill.,
%.
Carrie A. Lee-Lot 8, block 8, n "a sec 5, 1. %:
Carrie A. Lee-Lot 4, 5lock 3, n sec 5, 1, r %.
Isabella Mitchell-N n lot 6, block 3, W a sec 5, t
1,r23.
Carrie A. Lee-comg on line of Demfng street, 80
feet Of line of said Il sec thence W 13l feet !;
thence 1T6 feet thence 13l feet; thence n to
beg. n u sec 6, ]. %.
Gibson Lewis-Com'g 308 feet of W cor of lot IL
thence to line of lot Is; thence n S8 feet
thence on line of Sykes, johnson and Marines
land to line of sec 6; thence IA rods thence
% rods thence n IL rods thence 10 rods
thence n to beg, IA sec 6, t /, %.
81. A. Chase-Comg rs rods of 8 W cor of lot Is;
thence 10 sec line; thence 8 81 rods; thence W
to Park avenue; thence 81 rods to beg, n
sec 6, u, %.
Emma w. auarles-Com'g Sc rods offs cor of lot
16 thence rods; thence W to Chicago street ;
thence rods; thence to Park avenue, to beg
neN sec 6, t I. r2S.
rod of cor Of lot II thence to lot belonging
to City of Kenosha; thence SLY along line of
said lot rods; thence to line of Chicago
street thence TO beg, ne 8, !, r %:
John McConaell-Comg go rods Of 8 cor Of lot IL;
thence 8 rods; thence 6 rods thence 5rods
thence rods to beg, n "a sec 81 l, r q:
John Sershon-Com'e 8 hue Of Julius st IL rods
ely from the line which dividesthe and W halves
of said II sec thence on said line of street 4e
# HIN; thence $ 1881 #; thence so 1O-12thf
#; thence n to place of beg, "a sec g, l., %
Eliza Wilson-Comg line of Julius st, IL rods
Of W line of n Of said "a sec thence SLY on west
lire Of Julia McConnelrs land to cor Of same
about 1881 feet; thence W to W line of e u Of
said II sec thence on saId line to line Of
Julius st thence e to beg, n Il 8 6, ], r %.
Fond and Strong's Addition.
Eliza wiIson-Lots and 4, block 15 a sec 6, t j
r3.
Mat Murphy-Lot 2, block q, "a sec 8. t !, r %
Holmes and Nichols Addition.
Estate Of J. L. Orvfs-Lot l. and IA of lot 2, blocl
| 6.nsZ 6sy1, re-.
Geo. Smifh-Eot s. block Z, n u s6,t1, %.
| Philip HarTaon-Lots and 8, block 9, e Il sec
/ tt, r3.
Flora A. Hoyt-com'g 2 rods and rods Of n
cor Of said Ii sec; thence parallel with II sc
| line II rods; thence W rods ~ links; theme
| to line Of Prairie avenue; thence to beg,
i " sec Q, t /, r23.
Biggs, Spencer & Co-Com'g 8 rods and rods
Of n cor Of said n sec; thence IL rods to Fr'
| mont avenue thence said avenue 10 I0ds
thence . IL reds thence 10 rods to beg, "
sec 9, t1,r %.
8. 7. Brande-Com'g 20 rods and 20 rods W Of a
cor Of said "a sec; thence on line Of FremOn
ave rods thence II rods; thence 3 rod!
thence " to beg, v "a SIC 9, Il. %.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23
Ehle's Subdivision Of s,x Aor...

Ehle's Sub Division Of Six Acres.
Est of Aug Kempf-All within subdivision Of LOT.
and 2, blk Is, W u sec 6, t1,r23.
UDknown-E 4 of lots and g. block ie nxLsac
e,t1,r23. y -
Fourth Ward.
Mrs A. Klpfel-Com'g 1907 # of n W cor Of said
biock; thencee to line of block thence 8 40 n
thence to line of block; thence n TO beg
block 4, e Z sec 81, t2, r23.
Henry O'Hara-W "a of nwL block 7. u sac
81, t2r23 - ~
Hattie Brande-Comg at cor of block: thence "
DUN; thence parallel with line of block to 4
point i5I feet 5 of n line of block; thence par
allel with n line Of block 50 feet; thence to
Deg block 20, Il sec 81, t2r2S.
5e2nie's Addition.
y. r. Milliams-Lot 4, block 2, sw X sec 3I.t2r
Mary GILL # of lot4 block son X sec 81. to
Washington Island.
VIM. Mygatt--Com'g at cor of lot 50 of block
.nence to then line of the n harbor pier; thence
70 sec line; thence sec line to a point " az
ana opposite to the cor oflot "a of same BLOCK.
thence 70 W cor of said lot; thence . to sW
RS. -
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23

Oh tIIE OEUdI sLIO6I IudtG6r TIE COIl-
mittee on streets and alleys reported.
Report read, and, on motion of Aid.
German, the same was laid on the
table.
The Finance committee reported
having examined the Treasurer's last
quarterly statement, compared vouchers
and stubs and cancelled them, and found
the statement correct.
On motion of Aid. O'Brien, report ac-
cepted and statement placed on file.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23
STATE OF WISCONSIN-COUNTY COURT FOL
KENOSHA COUNTY-IN PROBATE.


KENOSHh C0UNTY-IN PROBATE
Notice is hereby given that at the regular term of
the County Court to be held in and for said county
at the County curt in the city of Kenosha on
the first Tuesday, being the fourth day of May, A. D.
1856, the following matters will be heard and con-
sidered
JOHN WRIT. Deceased, Estate.
The application of Anna Heyden for the appoint
ment of an administrator of the estate of John Wrtz
late of the city of Kenosha in said county
CORNELIUS N. GULicK. Deceased, Estate.
The application Florence Guick Brister former
ly Florence Gulick) for the examination and allow
anee OF her final account Administrative of the
tsse of Cornelius NJ. Gulick, late of the town of
Paris, in said county deceased and for the assign
ment and distribution of the residue of said estate
according to law.
MARGARET MURRAY, Deceased, Estate.
The application of James NORM, as executor. TO ad-
NIT to Probate the last will and testament of Mar
garet Murray, late of the town of Brighton in said
county, deceased.
Dated Kenosha, Wis, April 9th, 1886.
BY order of the Court.
ANTHONY VAN WICK,
County Judge.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23

NTnm Send 10 cents postage, and we will
kEItIlsIbl mail you free aroyal, valuable. sam
nFEH 1 pie box of goods that will put you in
nHVI the way Of making more money at
once than anything else in Ameri-
ca. Both sexes Of all ages can live at home and
work in spare time all the time. Capital not re-
CURED. We will start you. Immense pay sure for
those who start ut once. STIEsoS 3 Co., Por tland
Maine.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23
MAILS OPEN.

eI H.. from the North and South; 12:l5 P. NJ.
from the West; 200 P. NJ, from the South: 2:3O
p. 81. from Milwaukee; 545 ?. d.. from the North;
7:l5 from the South.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23
MAILS CLOSE.

S:i5A. NJ, South $40 A. NJ, Milwaukee; 100 p.
A.. North and South $50 P. NJ, West {; 500 p
~, South $50 p. NJ. North and South.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23

A correspondent of the Breeders Gas-
cite thinks it unwise to feed ensilage to
breeding cattle.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23
PROCEEDINGS OF THE COMMON
COUNCIL.
REGULAR MEETING.

April 5, 1886.
Meeting called to order by President
Grant.
Present-Ald. Cantwell, OpBrien,
Myers, German, Wallis and FRANKIE.
Minutes of last meeting read and ap-
proved.
The committees reported the follow
ing bills correct, and. on motion, the
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23
Town of Wheatland.

~ RIR Co-A piece of land running through y
Sc u sec 6, tt, T 19 No. acres, 8.
4 Z Cos-Comg 10 rods of n of
swH of sec 80, t 2, 10; thence southsrly
along the line of the R. r. track so rods OF the
s. line W u of $ Il of the sec 50; thence e
along said line 100 # thence along the line of
thence " to place of beg, sec 81, 2, 10; No.
acres 50-IO(ths
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23

When Baby was sick, we gave her Castoria,
When she was . Child, she cried for Castoria.
Whom she becam, Miss, she chung to Castoria,
When she had Children, she gave them CastosiA
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23
HOW TO USE
CREAM BALM

Place a particle Of
the Balm into each
nostril and draw
stron G b re a tn s
through the nose. II
will be absorbed and
begin its work OF
cleansing and heal
ing the diseased
membrane. 1t al
lays inflammation
prevents fresh colds,
NOT A LIQUID Oh
SNUPP.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23

$l9,x0o "a
The streets and alleys account appears
unusually large by reason of the amount
of permanent sewer laid the past year,
over 500.
The account should also have credit
for poll tax and other receipts, $437, and
damages paid, $116. The pauper ac-
count has credit for 1928 for boarding
paupers. The fire department account
includes water tax, 1867, and new hose
purchased the past year, $500.
The receipts from sale of Gem tery
lots was 1888.
The contingent account includes all
municipal expenses and salaries, except
ing police.
Respectfully submitted.
F. w. MATHEWS, City Clerk.
On motion, the Clerks report was ac-
cepted.
The following resolution was present
ed and read:
RESOLVED. That we hereby express our
appreciation of the labors of Mayor
Simmons in behalf OF our city, and ex-
tend to him our vote of thanks for his
fidelity and impartiality as our presid-
ing officer during the past year.
1t was, on motion, adopted unani-
mously.
On motion of AID. O,Brien, the council
adjourned sine die.
F. w. MATHEWS, City Clerk.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23
BUSINESS CARDS.

DIR. w. M. Farr.
PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON,
KenOsha, Wis.
Office at Hurd q Nauth's, Union Drug Store
Main street.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23

The finance committee reported hav-
ing examined the Treasurer's final state
ment and found it correct and cancelled
the orders and stubs.
Moved by AID. O'Brien to accept and
file, which carried.
II shows
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23
Town of Salem

Louise BROWN VIZ \ sec "a. 1, 20; No.
acres, 10
Town of Paris.
Thomas Martin estate-N Il Sc Il sec II, t2, 81;
No. Acres A
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23
Town of Brighton.

IOWn Vi brighton.
Frances Kuhn-N W "a eH So, y, r 20; No
acres, 40.
Frances Kuhn-S AnwHs 2, 20; No
acres, 10.
Ludwig Ssubert-NwH W sec 20, to. 20; No
acres, 40.
Town of Bristol.
John Swain estates y sw Il s21, 1,r 81 /; No.
acres, so.
John Swain estate-Se n X 81, t /, 81
No. acres, 40.
John Swain estate-N W HgeZ 80, tt, q
No. acres, 80.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-04-23

S55,573 81
JN0. 0'D0NNELL,
Treasurer.
Kenosha, April 5, 1885,
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07
Arkansaw Etiquette.

A travelling man happened in an
out.of-the-way neighborhood in Ar
kansas last winter, and being obliged
by swollen stream to remain night
or two at country tavern, accepted
an invitation to attend a country
dance or ball with the landlord, who
was an original of the old-time CAR.
kansaw Traveller" school.
The ballroom was about twenty
feet square and the floor laid Of pun
cheons split from large trees, some Of
which were rough and others smoother.
AS the "ball" or "hoe-down" went
on the smoother puncheons were in
demand, and stout, burly fellow,
leading his inamorate out for dance
as the music began, said:
"Now stick to your punchcon, Sal" "
The traveller observing that owing,
perhaps, to the scarcity of seats, each
man when not dancing held. one OF
the girls seated on his lap, and he also
being desirous of dancing, asked his
host, the tavern-keeper, for an intro
duction to one of the girls.
Don't need any, stranger. Jist
pick out yer gal, grab 'er by 'er hand,
and 60 to dancin' with 'er," was
the answer.
Selecting one the traveller followed
instructions, but was paralyzed when
the burly Arkansan, on whose LAP
she had been sitting, drew a Colts re-
volver, and, cooking it, aimed at the
new conner, saying;
"Sot or back thar, stranger, sot 'el
back. ."-Arkansaw Traveller.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07
A Family Trouble.

Nine A. NJ: She--"My dear little
hubby, | really need a new bonnet
very much"
He-"How much will it cost p
She-"Oh, only about S25."
He-"Only s25, Ell? Well, my
dear little wifey, business is very bad
and you can't have one"
She-"I can't! Well VIC shall see, y
Six P. NJ: He-"1sn't dinner
rather late tonight ?"
She-"I presume it is"
He-"How soon do you think it will
be ready, my dear"
She-T don't think it will be
ready at all, darling"
He-"Why? What do you mean p
She-"I am on n strike. No bon
net, no dinner"
Ten T.. NJ: He-"My dear, is the
strike still Oh? -
Shelly pet, it is still on"
Hc-"Are younot getting hungry ~
Shc-"No; had dinner at mothers
before you came home"
He-"Will the strike last until
breakfast think you ?"
She-"There is but one way to end
it at all"
He-"H'm! Well, my pet, if you
will 60 and get me a bowl of bread
and milk or cup of coffee, | think
we might adjust the difference be-
tween labor and capital by means Of
arbitration"
p. S.-A compromise was finally
made on the basis Of si5 bonnet
Chicago Rambler.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07
High. Priced Cigars.

For 20 cents EACH" said the pro-
prietor of one Of the largest and
most fashionable cigar stands on
upper Broadway, "you can buy as
good cigar as one wants to smoke
The difference in flavor Deoween that
and one that costs 81 is too slight to
be noticed almost. You can't make
great many young men believe
that, though. | used to have a
wealthy young customer who quar-
relied with me once because / didn't
keep a cigar that sold for more than
80 cents.
81 told him | would order some for
his especial benefit. After he had
gone / took fifty of the 25-cent cigars,
wrapped them carefully in tin foil,
and put them in an old box with a
tag stating that they cost 81 each,
"The next day he came in and ask
ed me if / had filled his order.
81 told him that at great personal
inconvenience / had done so, and
then ] handed him out one of the dol
lar cigars.
Gle took five and never could be
induced to smoke any others.
They cost great DEAL he used
TO say, but the flavor is so fine that
they are more than worth it.
81 want a medium strong cigar,
said an old gentleman who now enter.
cd the store,
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07

A lady OH n Rock Island train had
small dog with her, which seemed
to be out of sorts about something,
and disturbed the passengers not a
little by its whining. At length a
man who sat in the next seat forward
faced about and said els the little
fellow sick ?" ooh, no." said his
mistress "but | think he wants a
drink of water" "Then | will get
him some,' said the gent, good-natur-
edly, as he took cup from his satch.
el and started to go to the cooler.
"Hold on,' exclaimed the lady, with
alarm, as she handed him cup of
her own. "Take this, please. I am
very particular what cup my dog
drinks out Of" After watering the
pup the stranger went into the smok-
er and offered the brakeman a quarter
TO kick him,--Chicago Ledger.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07
His Faith Strengthened.

Brother Ike said u gentleman of
color to apother darkey yesterday.
Eyer orter been to de pra'r meeting
las night. We prayed for YER
Am dat fac'?"
"Hit am"
Den Is got faith in pra'r. Dot
pra'r was answered.
"Sure huff e.
"Fo' God hit wus.
"Tell me about it, Brudder Ike
"Wall, Ezekiel, Use got dc fattes
turkey at my house yer cher seed.
An he was roostin low las night
berry low.-Goodall's Sun.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07
A Certificate Wanted.

BiiSllluuu WIZ 10 lICSH W InlS GUILTY.
and determined to combat American
ideas. He is good deal better CON-
pany than an American would be in
Europe. Such a chap rode with us
from Vicksburg over to Jackson.
Excuse me, ye know" he began as
the conductor came along, "but I'd
like compartment to myself"
There was no place to put him ex-
cept in the baggage car, and when
this was ascertained he replied
"Ah, well, Pm no bloomin' chump,
ye know? Is this a hair line rail
road ~
"Never heard that it was, said the
conductor.
"Then why didn't they direct me to
the hair line! What's the use, ye
know, in fellow creeping and twist
ing all over the country to fetch up
at some place which is on u hair
line?"
We had no sooner got him quieted
down OH that than he began to find
fault with the scenery along the road.
"It's divilish awkward, yc know, to
be gazing at nothing but a pine
forest" he broke out. "If there are
no mountains, cliffs, valleys or pretty
villages, why not 60 to work and pro-
vide them? They can't expect fell
low to put up with such as this and
go over the route another time"
We rubbed him down gently, and
had restored his good nature when we
side-tracked for ten minutes for the
other train TO pass.
"Pm no bloomin' chump, ye know,
but | certainly protest against this
delay. If there is only one track
who is to blaim for it? Is my val
liable time to be taken up in waiting
here because the other train is not OH
time! In the first place there is nc
hair line; then the scenery sets one
crazy then VIC must switch off and
submit to delay. Gents, observe that
protest"
We patted him OH the back and
lulled the storm, but it broke out
again rs soon as we reached jackson
He didn't like the situation Of the no.
tel nor any of the rooms in it, nor the
way the porter talked back TO him
and he flung himself into a chair and
exclaimed:
Pm no bloomin' chump, yc know
but can't go this-really, / can't"
While he had been fussing around
we had put up little job on him, and
now informed him that there was a
carriage at the door to drive him to a
fine hotel in the suburbs-a place VIC
had not time to visit.
That's jolly, and ] won't forget
the favor, we know" he said as he tos.
sed his bags into the hack and drove
Oh.
The driver was directed to take
him out to the Insane Asylum, and
the order was faithfully carried out.
"Pm bloomin' chump if it isn't a
fine building, though can't say much
for the scenery" said the man as
they drove up.
He alighted with all his baggage
and entered the Superintendent Office.
In about an hour he returned to the
hotel, and bursting into the office
where we sat smoking he hotly an
nounced:
First there is no hair line then
no compartment then no scenery ;
then no double track then / arrived
at the tavern to find it only a third
rate club house then Pm sent knock
ing about to suburban hotel, and
when | reach it what does the bald.
headed old cock-a-doodle Of a land
lord inform me- Why, gents, that
I've got to have certificate of in
sanity to be admitted Pm bloomin
chump if your blarsted country isn't
enough to drive one wild Quad,
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07

eyes, sir" responded the cigar man
as he handed out n number of small
cigars. The old gentleman laid down
Il quarter on the counter and took
six cigars.
"That isn't the kind of man who
pays dollar for 25.cent cigars" we
said.
"No," answered the dealer. He
leaves that sort Of folly for his son.
He is the father of the rich young
man. New York Sun.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07

"Pa, can money talk "
That's what betting men say, some
times, my son."
"What can il talk ?"
II suppose it can talk good cents. "
FIX.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07

as he man of much caliber ?"
said a Connecticut avenue girl to a
Dupont Circle belle about a certain
gay and giddy Congressman.
"Oh, yes" was the confident reply,
"he is the greatest bore / ever saw" ="
Washington Critic.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07

An exchange believes the Panama
canal will be completed in the time
allowed, because De Lesseps is "mov-
ing heaven and earth" to accomplish
it. He would get on faster if he
moved less heaven and more earth
San Francisco Wasp.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07

Old gentleman, to small boy smok-
ing cigarette Little boy, don't
you know that great many people
die from smoking cigarettes ?"
Small boy: eyes, (puf), but
many people (puff) die who puff }
don't smoke 'em." New York Times.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07

"And how is the ozone ?" inquired
the old Boston lady in search of sum-
mer board.
excellent, first class" said the
rather puzzled housekeeper; eve get
it from the city regularly every day"
New York Mail and Express.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07

Daughter: Wasn't julius Caesar
one Of the strongest men that ever
lived, pap
Father; "What makes you ask
that question ?"
Daughter: 81 was just reading
that he threw bridge over the
Rhine. ."-Siftings.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07

Give us, o, give US man who
sings at his work." says Carlyle. Oh,
yes; give him to us deliver him in
to our hands. He occupies the next
office, and we can't get at him.-Bos-
ton Post.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07

A water proof garment-the coat
of the toper's stomach.-Boston Com
mercial Bulletin.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07

ella, say good night to the gov.
erness and give her a kiss.
"No, mamma, | don't want to kiss
her."
"Why not ?"
Because she'll box my ears. She
did papa's. ."-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-07

A Boston woman has written a
very brief letter to a member of Con-
gress from Massachusetts. 1t reads
as follows: "Balaam's ass spoke
once-can't you ?"-Ex.