The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1886-12-25

| flXed?'
'Ah, hah!' Sim replied, as he came
up and carelessly sat down on one end
of the log.
'Confound yer fool soul!' shouted the
old man, 'ain't yer got no sense?'
'I'm all right; amt nothin' the mat
ter with me. Come ter think er bout
it thar do peer ter be er fool in the
neighborhood, an i. sorter peers like
he's dun jammed his foot inter the crack
NV er log
sNever mind, TIL fix yer fur this
'Peerslikey you've already fixed yuse'f.'
sSim, for Gods sake split operr this
log an let me git outen here
Don't like ter split wood, but eff
yer've got any plowin' yer want done 1
don't mind doin' it fur YER
you air brute,' the old man raved.
'Yas, that's what they said down in
the holler, but the branch KEEP on er
runnin'.'
sSimmie.'
That's me-
please turn me er loose
Il amt got er holt Nv YER
you air the blamedest fool I ever
seen.'
That's me, an ter-morrer will be
Chrismus, too. Lowed that I'd come
over an take dinner with yer, but 1
hearn that yer didn't want nobody but
preachers ter come round yer
Turn me loose, Sim, an yer may
come.'.
Tell yur whut I'll do. Turn yer er
loose eff yer'll gin me er Chrismus pres
ent.'
I'll do it; I'll gin yer er calf
Come er GIN
Two hogs
mo, gin me Man,
Il won't do it, the old man indig-
nantly shouted.
'All right, then; goodbye
'Hol' on, Sim.'
WALL
'This thing is er bout ter pinch my
foot off,
'Ah, hah, but I must CO.
Say, Sim.'
WALL
'I'll gin yer the gal. 1 CANT STAN
this no longer
Shall we take it down in writin'? p
ooh, mussy, no; my words ez good
ez my bond.
'All right.
He soon split open the log and liber-
ated the old man.
Come on ter the house, Sim, an git
yer present. Thar aint't no back-down
in me-
When they reached the house the old
man said: 'Hide out here till I 60 in
have SUMO run Will 1Ndn.
He had never seen his daughter look
ing so happy.
'Whut's the matter, Nan?'
'Nuthin'.'
wall, whut makes yer giggle thater
way2 Wy, Martha's gigglin' too. l
wish mer die eff I ever seed sich pack
er geese. Confound yer, Sim, I told
yer ter stay out thar. Wy, look at the
gal, kissin' the fool feller. Martha,
whut do all this mean? wy, dogs my
cats, whut yer wanter kiss me fur? Wall,
waller haw, haw-I never did see the
like
sOld man. said Sim, lit won't be
many hours now till Chrismus, an tell
yur whut lowed wus best. Jest ez
soon ez ther first rooster crows airter
ther clock strikes twelve I'm goin' out,
git jestice NV the piece an git married. ,
'Yer amt er goin' ter do no sich Nv
er thing' the old man exclaimed. mo,
sir, yer amt er goin' ter bulge, fur Pm
goin' airter the jestice Nv the piece my
self. Oh, ole man Horner, when he
takes notion, is er good one
When the clock struck twelve Sim
said: 'Now lessun fur the rooster |!
Ding him, will he never crow; thar he
is! Git yer nag, ole man.
Old Horner soon returned, and the
couple were married. At the breakfast
table, while the neighbor's guns were
firing salutes to the Saviour's birthday,
old Horner said: Il still don't un'er-
stan why yer all giggled so yistidy
eveniu.'
sW'y, pap laughed the girl, 'it wuz
cause we had dun slipped up on yer SOP
How'd yer slip up on me9'
sW'y Sim he 'fessed 'ligion luther
day, has fined the church an the con-
funce has dun made er preacher outen
him, an he had gone to tell yer the
good news when he found yer cotch by
er log
wall, wall, said the old man, Sim
er preacher, wall, er haw! haw! thejoke
| is on him.
'Why SOP Sim asked.
cause yer has ter pay double price
fur the gal.