The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-05-13
Bench aud Bar.

members of gentleman who, not
wishing to pay the legal and recog-
nized fee for a consultation with his
lawyer devised an expedient whereby
he expected to gain the Information he
required without the usual cost. He
accordingly invited the man Learned
in law to dine at his house on a par
ticular evening as friend and old &C.
quaintance. The lawyer gladly &C.
cepted the invitation, and attended at
the house of his friend and client
promptly to the minute. The CONVEX
sation for some time was general and
agreeable, and the shrewd client, by
limiting and suggesting, at last drew
the lawyer out into a learned and OK
plicit dissertation upon the subject
the host wished to be Informed upon.
The client, pleased, satisfied, and
smiling, chuckled thinking how nicely
he had wormed out the advice de-
sired and pumped his lawyer free of
cost.
The feast over, the lawyer departed,
equally pleased, and, both being salts
fled, all went merry as a marriage-bell,
But few days afterward the client re-
ceived letter from his lawyer inform
ing him that the charge for profession
al advice and consultation was lbs. 4d..
and would he "kindly attend to the
IS Of
venience and oblige?' The client
was wild-caught in his own trap; but
being determined to outwit the lawyer
and gain his OVID ends. he forwarded
to the latter bill for 'dinner, wines,
and accessories supplied,'' on the 10th
inst, amounting to thirteen shillings
and four pence, saying that if he would
settle the incloscd bill he should only
be too pleased and happy to settle the
lawyers little bill. The lawyer re-
torted by threatening to commence an
action against mine host for selling
wines without license unless his (thc
lawyer's) bill was Immediately paid.
Do necb to say that the lawyer was
victorous?.
When l was boy l heard of a law
yer who was called up in the middle of
a cold winters night to draw up the
will of an old farmer who lived some
three miles away, and who was dying.
The messenger had brought cart to
convey the lawyer to the farm, and the
latter in due time arrived at his desti-
nation. When he entered the house
he was Immediately ushered into the
sick room, and he then reque sted to be
supplied with pen, ink, and paper.
There were none in the house. The
lawyer had not brought any himself,
and what was he to do? Any lead pen
Gil? he inquired. No; they had none.
The farmer was failing, though quite
conscious. At last the legal gentleman
saw cha]ked up on the back Of the bed
room door column upon column of
figures in chalk. These were milk
scores or "shots.' He Immediately
asked for piece of chalk, and then,
kneeling on the floor, he wrote out
concisely upon the smooth hear,h-stone
the last will and testament of the dy-
ing man. The farmer subsequently
died. The hearth-stone will was sent
to the principal registry in London,
with special affidavit, and was duly
proved, the will being deposited in
the archives of the registry. l may
mention that the law does not state
upon what substance or with what in
strumcnt will must be written.
There was once a plain, outspoken
Judge, who, addressing the jury, said:
Gentlemen of the jury, in this case
the counsel on both sides are unintel-
ligible, the witnesses on both sides are
incredible, and the plaintiff and defend
ant are both such bad characters that
to me it is indifferent which way you
give your verdict
1t was once reported to the notorious
ange was OH the point of entering into
the country, and that he was already
preparing..a manifesto as to his induce
ments and objects in SO doing. ''Pray,
my Lord Cbief-II usticc,' said gentle
tleman present, "what do you think
will be the heads IF this manifcsto?'
Mine will be one.' he grimly replied.
An undoubtcd alibi was some time
ago successfully proved in an Ameri-
car court, as follows:
''And you say YOU arc innocent of
the charge of stealing this rooster from
Mr. Jones?' queried the Judge.
Yes, sir; l am innoccnt-as ,nno-
cent as child
You are confident you did not steal
the rooster fom Mr.. Jones?''
"Ycs, sir; and can prove it,
"How can you prove it?
II can prove that didn't steal Mr..
Jones rooster, Judge, because stole
two hens from MIR. Graston the sane
night and Jones lives five miles from
Grastons.:'
The proof is conclusive said the
Judge; "discharge the prisoner.
"Gentlemcn of the jury,' said ar
Irish barrister, lit will be for you tc
say whether this defendant shall be
allowed to come into court with un
blushing footsteps, with the cloak o:
hypocrisy in his mouth, and draw three
bullocks out of my clients pocket witt
impun;ty.'
| We have heard of several cases O
female ingenuity in aiding the escape
of prisoners. Here is one: The Grim
inals were handcuf1ed, and with thci
escort was awaiting the train which
would convey them to the county Jail
Suddenly woman rushed through tn
crowd of spectators with shower o
tears and cried out: kiss me good-by
Ncd!' The escort good-naturedly al
lowed the process of OSCILLATION to b.
performed, and the sheriff smiled feel
ingly. The woman passed key from
her own to the prisoners mouth, will
which he undid the ''bracclcts' an,
!: escaped while the train was in motion
$500 Net Called For.
Itseems strange that it is necessary t