The Sunday herald., 1886-09-05

State. There Ia no branch OF the law on which state
Legislation differs moro widely. What is perfectly
legal In place may he justth reverse In another
Some OF the points given In this article not true
anywhere. Thus the reader Is told that aft don't
matter much what the writing is ont may he on
Slate etc. The only decision on this point is prob
ably one in Pennsylvania, and that distinctly de-
clarcs that viii on slate Is not good because II
may he so easily altered without detection. Again,
the article says that bcqucst to- witness 10 will
Is treated as void. This may be 40 IN sotiS
places, hut uuder tNe act OF Congress-
renewing all disqualification OF witnesses account
of interest," the old law has ceased, along with the
for IT, In this District. 80 II Ia said In the Chit
cago paper that no one but soldier or sailor eau
make nuncupatlve testament, or will, by word or
mouth. Any one in danger OF death can doso int this
District,so aras regards personal propcrtyby having
three witnesses present To 60 further would he TO
rewrite the whole article, on more general Interest,"
but equal fallacIousuess, Is floating extract from
some German professor, devoted to the thesis that
there is really no expression Ia the eye. 1t readily
appears from his argument, though no does not ex-
plain 1t himself, that by the eye he means merely the
eyeball, use OF language which is open to dispute
Granting him this, he proceeds to prove that all the
expression that we attribute to the eye lies In Its
surroundlngsthe brow, tho lids, the expression OF
tho rest OF the face, and N the professor ever
saw man with glass Eye Ne odght TO have dis.
covered Just how mitch expression there Is III Tho
surroundings OF the ego, when the living member H.
SELF .the window OF the soul" is absent. The mere
eyeba is full OF expression, as one eau readily see
by setting the rowing orb Of the poet or the fur,lve
glances OF the thief against the axed, steady gaze OF
the man OF action Compare the lqutd,mcng look OF
love, the fearful eye OF Rref with the fierce glare
OF frenzy. Then the pathologlc state OF the eyeba
the bloodshot veins, the datcd pupil, the sinking
into Its orbit al change the expression greatly The
alleged German professor Is evidently as much on
his base as the mythical Chicago lawyer. The col.
umns OF recipes and household directions arc an-
other fruitful place for twain science all AMI false
philosophy. hut It would 10 an endless task to hunt
down all the Instances.
II is no wonder that hasy writer's for the press TALL
no plumbers, which the scissors editors iuddstri.
ously disseminate, when we nud men OF note, In
studied magazine essays, tripping like Professor
Proctor In an article on American oratory. lie tells
story which he ixes upon Edward Everett, intend
ell TO show the theatrical character Of some AmerI
can speeches-how the orator hired a Revolution
ary veteran TO stand up ut a certain point In his
speech, and how awkwardy the veteran interrupted
him through not understanding the programme.
Now this Is evidently no other than wild distortion
Of the Old story about Daniel Webster at the Bunker
Hlll Monument, the only hum,r Of which resided In
the artiess remark Of the old soldier afterward,
since the speech went along Just as intended. 1t
viii be remembered that Webster was careful to
nave ut least one survivor of the great struggle In
conspicuous place In the audience and when he art
fully queried whether there were any such present
the old man rose, which gave Webster the opening
i'm sovn tIa
sir; 1t is rather for to stand in your presence"
and go on. The remark Of the bewildered grandsire
was That he did not understand what Mr.. Webster
wanted nrst he told me to stand up and as soon as
did he told me to Sit down" It IL really too bad to
d this on Everett and then spoil It In the telling.
A mild answer turneth away wrath, but witty
one often avoids rousing 1t in q dificult case. A
well-known librarian In this city, who IL charged
with the duty OF keeping his room quiet as possi-
BILE, lately had friend come In with pair of new
aud very squeaky boots upon his feet After ponderng
for while over the contents Of tome no was read
Ing the visitor began to pace up aud down The library
evoSing an Orator0 Of squeak, and groans from the
tortured leather, of which he alone seemed uncon-
sclous. After standing this o decent interval the
librarian remarked pleasantly, "You seem to COM
bine considerable exercise with your rcalipg,
Mr.-."
"Yes," replied the walker, serenely deaf to the
intended hint. 81 believe that nothing assists man
so much IN arranging his thoughts rs moving to and
fro. may say am follower OF the PcrIpatetic
school OF philosophy. Plato was the wsest Of us nil
and you know he taught his disciples while walking ~
"very true,' replied the librarian, with pointed
glance at the OF .nllng fo)tg.ar, "but Plato wore
sandals"
The nuisance was abatcd without further com.
ment.
The photographers, as well others, seem to have
difficulty In deciding on the formal name to he ap
piled to the laly OF ths White House. One use, the
formula "Mrs. President Cleveland" which might
be correct In Germany but In spite OF the pressure
| Of social convenience almost approaching neces
sly has never had any real sanction where the Eng
| llsh language is spoken In It's purity. Tho great
trouble with Is that there is no limit to Its appca
| tion In adcnocratlc commonwealth, anl though 1t
sounds dlgnllcd enough In the case Of "Mrs Cover.
nor" and "Mrs. Aimiral," 1t quickly becomes
ridiculous when 1t Is cxtened to include "Mrs. Cor
| poral" or "Mrs. Deputy Giuger." Another photog.
rapher goes to the other extrem, of printing "Mrs
Frances Cleveland" which Is horribly ill-omened
since 1t makes her very premlturely u widow. In
formal address, as every one knows, wife Is called
by her husbands full name so long as he Is living
e. o., Mrs. Grover Cleveland. and 1t Ia only when she
signs 1t herself that she writes her Christi N name
A more rcpllsivc style, which 1t Is pleasant tn
| note has no sanction whatever from the lady
herself, Is to call her "Mrs. Frances Folsom
Cleveland" There IL no legal compu,sl)n that
wife should take ner husbands name
| In fact, there Ia precedent for the opposite
| course, that Is to say, tho husband adopting
the wlfes family name; but when she does follow
the prevailing CUSTOM she ought to follow 1t loyalty
and altogether, rs token, In this case, for Instance,
that she has left the family OF Folsom, and become
| Joint head OF a new family OF Cleveland. For a
wife to tack her husbands family name after her
own, and give both equal prominence, seems to i'm
| ply that she derives more importance from her
family by birth than from her matrimonial alliance,
| and wishes TO preserve the distinction, lust a. q
pceress In her own right remains "Lldyr SO and.
| 80 when she niarrles u comnioner. II ts fair To
qualify this by saying that there are sometimes
special associations with the name, AMI II may be
preserved at the husbands special request; but the
regular social usage (wich Is the only law on the
subjecD Ia not, as sDme seem to sup?o3s merely to
annex the husbands name, but to alJpt 1t exclu-
sivcy. TO the philosophc mind, all these arc rlies
AMI name Is simply matter OF convenience; but
social etiquette Is like game, which, II played al
all, ought to be played according to the rules.