davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04

w. d. Suit, Druggist, Bippus. Ind,
testifes: Il can recommend Electric
BltterS as the very best remedy. Every
bottle sold has given relief in every case.
One man took SIX bottles, and was cured
of Rheumatism of 10 yeais' standing"
Abraham Hare, druggist, Bellvlle, Ohio,
aIlirmS: THE best selling medicine |
have ever handled in my 20 years eX-
perience, is Electric Bittcrs." Thou
sands of others haye added their tcsti-
mony, so that the verdict is unanimous
that Electric Bilters do cure all diseases
OF the Liver, Kidneys or Blood. Only a
half dollar bottle at L. d. Thomas
Drug Store.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04

"A Boston lawyer recently met his
match in witness who was giving evil
dence about an old lady's loss of mind.
Lawyer she look as l am looking
at you now, for instance? Witness
Won, yes; quite vacant likcl
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04
RELIGION AND SCIENCE IN A PACK
OF CARDS.

a soldier by the name Of Richard Lee
was taken before a magistrate in the old
Puritan days of Massachusetts,, for the
crime Of using cards at meeting. The
sergeant who had charge Of the com.
pany to Which the soldier belonged, said
that the soldier no sooner got to meet.
ing, than pulling out pack of cards, he
spread them before him. He first looked
at one card then another. The sergeant
said:
Orchard, put up the cards; this is nc
place for them"
Never mind that" said Richard.
When the services were over, the con
stable took Richard a prisoner, and
brought him before the magistrate who
said:
"H'ell, soldier, what haye you to say
for yourstlf?"
much, sir, hope"
Every good; if not, will punish you
severely"
Il have" said the soldier "neither
Bible nor common prayer book i have
nothing but pack of cards, and | hope
to satisfy your worship of the purity of
my intentions"
"lI'hen see the ace it reminds NE
that there is but one Cod
II hen I see the two itreminds me of
Father and Son.
"Nhen I see the three it reminds me
Of the Trinity.
"IJhen see the four it reminds me
Of the four Eyangelists.
"Ivheu l sec The five itreminds me of
the live wise virgins that trimmed their
lambs.
"When I see the six it reminds me
that in six days the Lord made heaven
and earth.
"When l see the seven it reminds me
that on the seventh day God rested from
the great work which he made, and hal
lowed it.
avn l sue ''c e'SuI II fehl!huS me
VI Nooh' MS WIFE, his three sons and
'''''' WIVES
" H'hcn l see the nine it reminds me
of the nine lepers that were cleansed by
our Saviour.
~ hen | see the ten it reminds me CT
the ten commandments.
When | see the king it reminds me
oi the Great King OF Heaven.
"When / see the queen it reminds me
of the Queen OF Shcba, who visited
Solomon, for she was as wise a woman
as he was a man. She brought with
her fifty boys and girls, all dressed in
boys apparel, for King Solomon to tell
which were boys and which girls. The
king sent for water for them to wash.
The girls washed to the elbows and the
boys to the wrist: so King Solomon fold
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04

would use Kemp's Balsam for the throat
and lungs. 1t is curing more cases of
coughs, colds, asthma, bronchitis. Group
and all throat and lung troubles, than
any other medicine. Tie proprietor has
authorized Biery, of Weissport, and
Thomas, of this place, to refund your
money if, after taking three.fourths of
bottle, relief is not obtained. Price
Soc and 81. Trial size free.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04
Ifnot paid in advance, $L.25.

Come, let's go and have a taste of
beer said genial nickle to pensive
hop that was scanning the latest market
report to see what he was worth. "No,
thank you,' replied the hop with digni-
ty, 81 never touch beer"
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04

Chief Graves, Of the Bureau Of En-
craving, being asked what design would
be placed on the Government oleomar-
garine stamps, said he thought "a stuffed
goat-a bogus butter, as it were-would
be about the right thing"
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04

Frazier's Root Bitters are not dram
shop beverage. But are strictly medi-
cinal in every sense. They act strongly
upon the liver and kidneys, keep the
bowels open and regular, cleanse the
blood and system OF every impuritv.
Sold by druggists, Sl.00. At Thomas
drug store.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04
When a man starts out to lecture he

When a man starts out to lecture he
puts on dress suit. A woman before
starting to lecture puts ON rightgown.
with your noyt order to your grocer, send
ior Il saigplr pound o. DreydoT2el,s Borax
soap. luu VII. hud II to he iHr best and
cheapest soau you can use Tor an purposes, il
Is plain statement OF fact, and the best way
Tor you 10 satisfy yourself is TO Try a pound.
A new game of cards is called "mat-
Ii the man wins he takes the
girl: if the girl wins she takes the man.
Hay Fever, Asthma. Relief guaran-
teed. Fontaine's Cure. For sale by c.
I. Horn, Druggist.
1t is wrong 10 speak of a "respccta-
blc' enbclzler as good man gone
wrong" lie is a bad man found out.
lfyou feel though water was gather
ing around The heart lheart -dropsy) or
have heaTrheumatisn papitation Of
The heart with sutiocation, sympathetic
heart lrouDle-Dr. kilmer's Ocean-Mcel
regulates. cOrrects aud cures.
Perhaps if We ha more big guns in
congress, We might have more in our
torlreSses.
When used according 10 directions,
Aver Aguc Cure Is warranted 10 efaii-
calr, from the system. Fever aa ! Arun.
Intermittent Ermiuent, ami Bilious
Fevers, al! all mAlIT.A li3eIsa4. Try
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04
Buolslen's Arnica Enlva.

The best salve in the world for cuts,
bruises, sores, ulcers, salt rhuem. fever
sores, letter. chapped hands, chilblands,
corns, and all skin cruptions, and posi-
lively cures piles, or no pay required.
1t is guaranteed to give perfect satisfac-
ton, or money refunded. Price 25 cents
per box, at T. ID. Thomas.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04

"A young man who has a good deal
of spare time on his hands wishes to
learn Of something that will keep him
occupied. We can think of two things
right otf-getting married ana tipping
over a beehive,
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04
nr.Frazer,s Mnein n,n,mnn.

a sure cure for all boils. burns, sores.
cuts, flesh wounds, sore nipple, Lard
and soft corns, chapped lips and hands.
Price 80 cents. Sold by druggists. VIII
liams Mfg Co., Props, Cleveland.
o. Sold by Thomas. the druggist.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04

Louisa NJ. AlcoJt has written sc.
quel to Little Men" We know no,
what its title is to be, but it is universally
agreed that large woman are the natural
complement of little men.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04
SWITEIN G. sH3RT1iDGE's ACADEMY
~ Fer Young Men and Eovs. Media Pa


II miles from Philadelphia. Fixed price
covers every expense, even books, &c. No
extra charges. No Incidental expenses
No Xalnlnaton for admission. Twelve ex-
perienced teachers, all men, aud all gradu-
ates; Special opportunities for apt students
to advance rapidly: Special drill for duh and
backward boys Patrons or students may
select any studies or choose the regular En,-
lish, Scientific, BUSINESS, Chlssical or Civil
Engineering course. Students fitted ut Media
Academy are now in llavard, Yale, Prince-
ton and ten other Colleges aud POiytechnic
Schools. 10 students sent to college IN fSS3,i6
~ lssl, 10 IN lss5 10 in 1886. graduating
class every year in the commercial DEPART
mcnt. 4 Physical and Chemical Laboratory,
Gymnasium and Ball Ground. 1870 vols.
doubled in 1888 Media has seven churches
and Il temperance charter which prohibits
the sale of all intoxicating drinks. For new
illustrated circular address the Principal and
Proprietor, SWlrHIN G. SIORTLlDGE, A.
MI lIarrard Graduatc) Media, Pem,'a.
Aug. q sG-ly.
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04
Your Children

Are constantly exposed to danger from
Colds, Whooping Cough, ,.'eroup, aud
diseases peculiar to. the throat and
lungs. For such ailments, Ayers
Cherry Pectoral, promptly admins
tered, affords speedy relief and cure.
As a remedy for whooping Cop,b.
with which many Of our children wsrc
aiiiioted, we used, during the past WIN.
Ter with much satisfaction, Ayers
Cherry Pectoral. For this affection, yyo
consider this preparation the most eff
caciou5 OF all the medicines which have
come to our knowledge. Mary Park
hurst, Preceptrcss, Home for l.ittlo
wanderers, Doncaster, Nd
My children have been pecuiiarly sub-
lcct to attacks of Group, and j failed 10
ma any effective remedy until 1 conn
menced. administering Ayers Cherry
Peetoral, This preparation relieves the
ullnculty OF breathing and invariably
cures the complaint. - David G.. Starks.
Chatham, Columbia Co, NY.
L have used Ayers Cherry Pectorai
IN my family for many years, and
have found 1t especially valuable in
Whooping Cough. This medicine allays
all irritation, prevents inflammation from
extending to the lungs, and quickly sub
dues any tendency TO Lung Compliant.
). b. Wellington, Plainvillc, Mich.
find no medicine so effective, for
Group and Whooping Cough. as AYERS
cherry Pectoral. 1t saved tho life of my
little boy, only six months old, carryjn1,
him safely through the worst case Of
hopping Cough I ever saw. Jane
Malone, Piney Flats, Tenn.
n
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04

When Baby was sick we gave her Castoria,
When she was Child, she criedfo Castoua,
When she became Miss, she chung to Cas;oric,
When she had children, she gave theme astoria
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04
No Pate nt-No Pay.
PATENTS

obtained for Inventors in the United states
Cahnda ana Europe, at reduced rates. with
our principal office located In Washington.
directly opposite the United States Patent
once, we are able to attend to all patent
business with greater Promptness and de
sIutch and at less Gust than other patent ut
torneNs who nre at u distance from WASH
ington, and who have, there fOre. to emnlOv
associate attorneys" We make preliminary
examinations and furnish opinions ~ to ma
tentabiliiy, Tree of charge, and all whu are
Interested in new inventions aud raients are
invited to send for copy OF our "tluide for
obtaining Patents" whirh is sent tree to
any address, and contains conn lete instruc.
tions how to obtain patents and other yalua
BILE matter We refer to the German mer-
lean National Bank Washington, u. G. the
Royal Swedish Norwegian and Danish l., VA
tions, at Washing ton; Hon. Jos. Casey, late
Nhlel Justice u. $. Court of Claims; to the
Officials of the y. : Patent Office and to
Senators and Members OF Congress from
every Stute. o.
Address: LOUIS BiGGERS 90, So
licitnrs OF Patents and AttOrneysutLaw Ie.,
Droit building WAsaiRGToN, u. u,
The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-09-04
Ayers Cherry PectoraI.

Prepared by DR.. j. c. Ayer& s. Co., Lowell, Macs.
so'd BY al Druggists. Price 81; six bottles, IS.
Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1886-04-08
NOTICE., WILLIAM BAREFoRD,

IN OthCH' - "ALLlhh DhhEF OID,
IN THE tenant of the house situated N. corner
Third and Market streets, In the Fourth ward of
the city Of Wilmington, county of New Castle
and State of Delaware In compliance with the
requirements of the acts OF the General
Assembly In such case made and provided, do
hereby give notice that shall apply In writing
to the Court of General Sessions Of the Peace
and Jail Delivery Of the State of Delaware, in
10th day Of May A. ID. 1885, being the next ter m
of said court, for n license for said house as an
inn or tavern for the sale therein of Intoxicating
liquors In less quantities than one quart, 10 DO
respectable citizens Of said ward recommend
the said application viz.
Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1886-04-08

NOTICE., JOHN NJ. LEGG, THE
IN TENANT of the house situated No. 72i
Market street, In the Sixth ward of
the city of Wilmington, county of
New Castle and State of Delaware, In COM
pliance with the requirements Of the acts of the
General Assembly In such case made and pro-
vided, do hereby give notice that shall apply
In writing TO the Court of General Sessions Of
the Peace and Jail Delivery of the State of
Delaware, In and for New Castle county, on
MONDAY, the 10th day Of Nav, A. ID. 1885,,
being the next term of said court, for a license
for said house as an inn or tavern for the sale
therein of intoxicating liquors in less quantities
than one quart, TO be drunk on the premises,
and the following respectable citizens of said
ward recommend the said application, viz:
Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1886-04-08
Hoods SarsapariIIa

Sold by all druggists. 81; six for IS. Prepared
by &. l. HOOD & Co, Apothecarles. Lowell. Mass.
100 Doses One Dollar
Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1886-04-08
A LITTLE GIANT.
Earold w. Raymond.


1 know q little giant, no bigger than tack.
Who can wrestle with fat man, and thr "
him on his back;
His knoIted little muscles, almost toe small to
spy,
Could turn you topsy-turvy and hardly seem to
try.
To tweak the nose, and pinch t e toes, and I'LL
one full Of woe,
Are jokes the midget loves to play a"ik4 on
friend and foe.
But he can do still great things than make
big man squeal -
He can split a stone in splinter, or break a blr
Of steel;
lie csn shape the dripping eaves'-drops into a
crystal spear,
And clIich thu falling rain so hard, I Will turn
all white with fear:
lie can rhHin the dashiug river, and plug the
rui ming ont:
lie can build wall upon the lake and shut tile
water out
hut II you want to see this little giant cut and
run,
Just build tiny fire, or ST. p out aud fctch tile
81. N cholaS for april.
Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1886-04-08

If the body receives daily proper amount Of
nutrition, and daily expels the worn-ou parts,
health Is the certain consequences; butby Il sud
den change of weather, tie pores Of the skin
may not perform their Office we'll, and matters
are retained which should have passed OF by
that avenue. All causes which impede lnsensi-
BILE Precipitation are fraught with danger, be-
cause matters which shnu have passed away
through the skin are returned again into clrcu-
iation, Brandrerh's Pills will remove all i'm
puritiep, from whu ever cause they may come
curing pain, Inflammation and Gods arising
from aboye cause In a few hours
Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1886-04-08


Mr.. Blaine has laid down his literary
men and taken up his political knife.
Having finished his Twenty Years in
Congress, )" he now proposes to finish Mr..
Edmunds' career in the Senate.-Ndsh-
Vitle American. .
In the path of philosophy, woman has
seldom strolled to much distance, but
when times are tight she can go to mar
ket with dollar bill and come back with
more comfort in basket than u man
could crowd into a two-horse wagon, if
told to back up and help himself
Chicago Ledger.
Student-"Well, we treated the patient
in the most approved way" Doctor
"Howg" Student-"Well, we put him
on milk diet; then he was put on wine;
then we put him on the electrical treat
ment; then we put him on quinine, and
now" Doctor-"You will put him OIL
ice."-H0tel Mail.
A Pennsylvania lady raised family Of
"a boys. Thirteen were i'll the Unior
army and one in the Confederate. Eleven
out of the IL were killed on the field o
battle, and the one in the Confederat,
army has not been heard from. TIVE
out of the 10 returned home, and one o
them has applied for pensi on Wids',
i1lgt0n Post.
Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1886-04-08
4msRyrLoUs MAN.
The Best Paid Of Living American
Tswrmmlsaas and His Hnbtfs.

ssHello, Joe ~
II you walk into cabinet meeting or
an executive session of the United States
Senate with the gentleman who is referred
to-; If you stroll through the magniiicent
halls Of the capitol Mt Albany; If you
walk down Broadway; IL you saunter up
Washington street, Boeton; II you get
tangled If you happen TO be in Vine
street beer garden in Cincinnati with
Joseph Howard, Jr., the chances are even
that half of tho people present VIII greet
you with 'sHello, doe"
Joseph Howard, DR., is the best known
Journalist in the United States.
He Ia the most popular writer for the
newspaper press living in America. His
income from his pen is over $25, 200
year.
He has the nimble wit of Partisan.
He has the resources of the best equipped
London editors. He has the political
saqacity of "leader" lie has as much
knowledge OF the people us Terrence v.
powderly. He looks like u mixture of
Boucicault and Napoleon Ill, and he
has many of their merits and faults.
At the age of 81 he has the spirit OF
boy the energy of steam engine, the
Vltallty OF hn eel.
Mr.. Howard is marvellous worker.
1t is nothing for him to sit down and die
tate four different articles to four differ
emit stenographers, pouring forth stream
of sound and sense which delights the
ears and imaginations of thousands OF
readers Or, during heated political
convention, he will follow the proceed
inRs with a ready and flowing pen, catch.
ing any salient point as it is made, and
sending dispatch which is work for hall
dozen men with the aid OF the conyen
ton.
How does such man live and stant
the strain? Even in the midst of active
and irregular life, his is q model of quie
and proper diet. Every morning at
O'clock he sits down to II quiet breakfas
of daintily cooked Heckers oatmeal, &C
companied by two eggs, cooked exactl.
two minutes, and glass of fresh cream
His lunch is a simple, rare chop am
baked potatoes. His dinner is always q
bird and q bottle" The best game in it
season, no matter what it is, woodcock
canvasback or golden ployer, and a SINAI
bottle of dry champagne. At night befor
retiring he always eats another dish
Heckers oatmeal, and never touches foo
or drink at any other time. By his regulr
diet he has kept his health perfect and
the marvel of newspaper men.
Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1886-04-08
THE RIVER OF LIFE.



The more we live, more brief appear
Our LIES succeeding stages;
A day to childhood seems year,
And years like passing agcs.
The gladsome current OF our youth,
Ere passion YET disorders,
Steals lingering like river smooth
Along It's grassy borders.
But as the careworn cheek grows wan,
And sorrows shafts ny thicker,
Ye stars that measure life TO man.
Why seem your courses quicken
When Joys have lost their bloom AnS hreaih
And lie itself Is rapid,
Why as we near the falls OF neath
Find we its tide more rapidly
II may be strange. yet who would csArse
Times course TO slower speeding.
When, one by one. our friends have senc
And left our bosoms b!eeilnsR
Heaven gives our years Of FADING strength
Indemnifying tleetness;
And those OF youth seeming length
Proportioned 20 their sweetness.
Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1886-04-08

Those who suffer most are the most
charitable. Chicago L,ager.
The green grocer in London is one who
sells vegetables. In this country he is
one who trusts.-Reto Orleans Picdyune.
The Knights of Labor in Hartford are
said to contemplate nominating Mark
Twain for mayor of that city.
At Sharon, Penna,, man drank three
quarts Of whisky few days ago. His
widow and children are in destitute
circumstances.
Wisconsin has sent Congressman in
place Of Rankin, deceased, whose name is
T. Hudd. But they say he is not a dull
T. Hudd.-0mdhd Herdld.
There is reform in the air or else Nor.
witch grog is losing its power. No one is
getting too drunk to get home or drunk
enough to get into the lookup now
Nor1oi1k Bulletin.
Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1886-04-08
PROGRESS.
Fritz schacIer.


Written for the Gazette and journal
Our hearts are filled with ceaseless yearning,
And, though we neer are satisfied,
We think that II the wish now burning
Within our breasts were gratihed,
Naught would be left us to desire.
But soon the time will come to each
When he will long for something higher,
Though all he wished be In his reueh.
Shall we, then, cease this endless striving
Rest with our present lot content,
And quit our planning and continuing
For things that Fortune has not lent
Not so though we may ne'er acquire
That which, acquired, our wants Will meet
Yet every time that we aspire
To better things, cen our defeat
VIII be an upward step, and nearer
The goal, which ne'er will be attained,
Although it groweth clear and clearer
With every step that we have gained.
Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1886-04-08
giftnst AppIiratiuus.

NJ oTICE-I, JOHN MEALEY, THE
~ OWNER Of the house situated at No. HIs
Markot street, in the Flret ward OF the city OF
Wilmington, county Oh New Castle and
State OF Delaware, IN compliance with
the requirements ~ the acts OF the
General Assembly In such tnse nude
shall apply In writing to the Court Of General
Seaslons OF the Peace and Jail Delivery OF the,
State of Delaware, In and for NewUnstlecounty,o
MONDAY, the 10Th day of Ma, A. d., 1886,
being the next term OF said court, for license
for said house as an inn or tavern for the sale
therein OF Intoxicating liquors In less quantities
than one quart, 10 be drunk on the premises,
and the following respectable citizens OF the
said ward recommend the said application, viz:
Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1886-04-08
Don,l Hawk, spit, cough,

suffer dizziness, indigestion, infamma-
ton of the eyes, headache, lassituie, in
ability to perform mental work and indis-
position for bodily labor, and annoy and
disgust your friends and acquaintance
with your nasal twang and offensive
breath and constant efforts to clean your
nose and throat, when DIR. Sage's Ca
tarrh Remedy" will promptly relieve you
of discomfort and suffering, and your
friends of the disgusting and needless in
fiictions of your loathsome disease
Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1886-04-08
LAND AND SEA.
Randall BIackshaw.

Look where the sea, with swift resi- ,tless tide,
Breabs on the sandy beach and rock-bound
shore,
Awhile with p'aintive murmur, then roar
Like that OF Gagged he Sta, their fool deni ID
And see with what calm strength and soyrsn
pride
The rocks, nnshaken aud triumphant soar
Above the battling waves, that more ard
more
Seek to encompasl them on every side
am thu ocean, thou, my Love, the land.
THAI spurns the humble sutton mt her feet
And lifts her queenly head where she may
meet
Such homage as the SIN and stars command.
The land shall yiald at last unto the sea,
And sooner, Love or later, thou 10 me
Tile Critic
NRw YONG Sent % 1877
Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1886-04-08
Tho UnIYersnI Rark.

All the world and his wife and children seem
10 have a bad cough. Nobody ought 70 have
one for more than So hours at most, when
cheap and perfect specific can be obtained
everywhere. Hale's Honey Of Horehound and
Tar pervades the whole country. The druggists
are bound to keep II, because 1t is standard
article, and there never yet was cough or cold
Obstinate enough TO resist Its mitigating and
curative properties. Prices 25 cents, 80 cents
and 81. Great saving by buying large size.
Pixies Toothache Drops cure In one minute.