News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-03-04
THE BAD BOY ON MAD DOGS.
THE LITTLE IMP SCARES HIS Pa
AND QHB GROCERYMAN. Il

ASAAHB huNaHlaSS " ShP @AyN
phobta Scare to, Play Fresh
Pranks-New Vaccination Scheme
'ldad dogi;, Mad dog!" shouted the
bad boy, as he, rushed into the grocery
store, jumped under the counter and
crawled behind the barrel of lump white
sugar. Glide yourself quick or you are
q dead man" The groceryman was
cutting O slice off a cheese for servant
girl with q shawl over her head. His
first idea was to run down cellar, but the
girl slid down there, so the groceryman
simply jumped into a crockery crate and
laid down and perspired. He wished
every dog in the world was dead.
Presently he heard 9 crunching behind
the counter, as of lump sugar being
chewed by q boy, and he raised up out
of the crockery crate slowly, got out Of
it and walked on tip-tne behind the coun-
ter, and took the bad boy by the ear and
lead him out by the stoye, and emptied
about hatful of sugar out of his pockets.
Then he looked at the boy. The boy
began 10 fFoth at the mouth, and snap
with his teeth, and he said:
''Oh, vaccinate me, quick. am bit"
The groceryman gave the boy kick
in the pantaloons, and said:
t'There, you are vaccinated. That as
the first application Of Pasteur's treat
ment. If you feel spells coming on
again, will give you more sole leather
virus in your system. What do you
mean coming in here yelling mad dog,
and soaring my customers down cellaT2"
and the grocerymap wrapped up the
cheese and called the girl out OF the
cellar and snnt her hOTna
''Oh, ! only wanted TO see If you were
coward, But you amt, oh, no. You
only went into the crockery crate head
first just for fun Say, do you believe In
vaccination9n and the boy brushed some
straw off the groceryman's coat.
eyes, I do" said tho groceryman.
''The science Of yaccination Is the great
esd discovery of this or any age and he
turned the boy round to give him
another kick.
"Well, so do T. said theboy as no put
the stove between himself and the
gPoccryman. 'Vrhe time Is coming when
vaccination is going to he used for every-
thing. l believe the time will como
when criminals viii be prevented from
committing crime by vaccination. For
instance, suppose you were thief, and
everybody knew it. | don't say you ares"
said tho Coy, as tho groceryman picked
up q piece Of barrel head, "though
your symptoms ore favorable. But sup
pose you were thief Take an honest
man, one everybody knows to be honest
and vaccinate him, and when it begins to
work, take some Of tho virus and
vaccinate you. AS soon as 1t began to
work on you, your power Of hft-
ing things tha4 did nnf belong to you
would be gone. You veonld become an
honest man IN spite Of yourself, by vac
cination. don't say it could be made
to work on you, but It might. II my
scheme works. and universal vaccination
fs established, there Will he no moro
crime. Then they viii vaccinate bank
cashiers against defalcations, and with
the virus from an honest minister, say, tho
cashier can't steal tosave him. And that
will be good way TO whip Sullivan.
Let him be vacclnated from virus taken
from 9 peaceable Quaker, and Sullivan
would become man Of peaca and any
Of tho boys could 20 up ahd swat him In
tho mouth, and he would 60 off and cry,
and say he would tell his mother. Tho
only thing am afraid of is that they
will get to using vaccination In politics."
''Oh, don't 20 on In that way, you
weary me, " satd the grocerypan, as he
took wash dish of water and whisk
broom, and began sprinkhng the floor,
preparatory 10 the regular senh-annual
sweeping out. l|THell me what tho CON-
motion Was over to your house last night7
I heard your father had to be dug out Of
the coal pile under the sidewalk. How
did ho get there9''
''Well, I'll tel YOU It was oil his
fault. You. see, We have boep excited
| about THE mad dog scares and asked
! pa whathe wouh do af ho met aunad dog,
told him he would get up and dust, but
he said he would grab tho dog by tho
hind legs and beat his brains
out He said men were towards gener-
ally, He hated to see mon get fright
ened and run when any calamity
happened. thought would
try pa, cause nSHer heard
Of his showing much sand. So
took our black setter dog and took pas
lather brush and put lather all around
the dog's month for foam. Then took
ono Of these little rubber bands and put
Il ground the dogs upper jaw. That
made the dog open his mouth and show
his teeth, and chew, so rs to get the rub
bev off. But the dog wagged his tail all
the time, cause be knew 1t was only one
my Jokes op him, and he wasn't mad.
But he dA look savage. When pa came
In from down town at supper time was
up stairs with tho dog. and let him go,
and he went down stains ON O galop TO
welcome pa. He thinks everything OF
pa Pa saw him coming and he saw tho
foam op his mouth, and pas hair Just
raised dghtSp. The dog was going to
Jump up on pa as usual, and have pa
take off the rubber band, but pa yelled,
"Take him off He's mad! Hammer, lock
yourself in the closet and telephone for
the patrol wagon" Well you'd dido
to see pa. He jumped right over the dog
and went down the collar stairs at two
Jumps, and crowded in the coal bin
under the kindlin9 wood. / wiped the
latheY of the dogs mouth and took tho
rubber band off, and me and tho dog
went down cellar and hunted pa out.
When pa saw our dog wRgging his tail
and acting so happy, and no froth on his
mouth, he oame out and then he said,
That settles It. Drank IN egg-nog
down town and ID went 20 my head, and
l thought SOW egg-nog all over the
dogs nose and mouth, and thought he
was mad. Poor doggie No more egg
nog for your Uncle Ike And then pa
crawied out of the coal bin and gave INC
half dollar not TO tell anybody he was
scared. 0, whew, whew, what dusti
What makes yoa sweep out the gro
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