davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1886-04-21

mites West OF Orrvllle, sulclded by hanging
himself in his barn.
FRANCIS BAUsHER was taken to the peni-
tentiary from Circleville, 10 serve SEN
tence Of eight years for cruelty to animals.
THE large barn of George Anger, Q
wealthy farmer living in Washington
Township, Holmes County, was struck by
lightning the other night, and taking fire
was burned to the ground. Also . large
lot of valuable machinery and some grain
were destroyed, entailing loss on all esti-
mated at $500. .sa
CONRAD SToLL attempted suicide by hang
ing In the jail at Cleveland, but was res
cued by the turnkey. He is charged with
selling liquor without . license. He had q
close call.
LEANDER RAKER, prominent mail con-
tractor Of Woodsfeld, Monroe County,
committed suicide by shooting himself.
He and bis wife have had good daal Of
| trouble of late, and while under the inilu-
ence Of liquor he ended his Life. The
weapon used was . shotgun, the contents
Of which passed entirely through HIS body,
1 almost ssyering II in two. Il sslll y'if7'
| WILLIAM e. BEEMER, Of Cedsrvills, IL the
successful candidate for the Eighth Dis
trict cadetship.
Ar zanesvills Patrick Gallagher hes BE-
gun suit against Andrsw Huffman for
elO,000 damages for killing his son John on
the 18th Of April last. Huffman was tried
and aequitteA. The petition rscttss that
John was the support OF his parents, end
BY his dssth they were robbed q their
nsans OF livelihood. The cass y . novel
one. 44l,ff f taff
D. WATsoH, 3 local freight brakeman
on the O., 4. and G. railroad, was Instantly
killed at Killbuek. Ave milss south cf Mi.
lsrsburg. An overhead bridgs struck hin,
end his bedy was hsssihly nangssd.
0Bonau owINDnls, . lad ten years OF aee
was s6ownaA = ~ Ohio . lDw nilsa ahc1e
] wslsvillA Ths body IVES recovered.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-10-03
The REAL FRENOH.


The celebrate Norwegian novelist. and poet, VI.
BlOrnsterne Bjornspu, mas recently IN PARIS aud
on hls retlrn hpmr he cOnned his impressions Or Tie
Pa islans To All Interviewer The following IA transs-
uOn " Tue very interesting which the NOrHe
gian observer i re i'O t-d 10 have male:
les TIE PsrI,idns are pure chinese. They reform
nothing, mp owe nothing, unu things have becomo
80 hsnppOrL-bie, Out WiJha s0dy established, Lhat
IL rrl hrss revolution 10 alter them Tue farsIins are
radical they they are; but theirs Is no radical
lsm la France except hat ~ despair and revolution.
TIE truth II thai tue French the most cOnssrva-
i've O- on tho face of tue World. They admire them
90 not daro make changes. In some thIngs they srs
tefrl'y Ornlndhaud. Iheir wOrkDen hayo 20 u" VIII
tlal' hauis many piece of wOIk which In Norway We
do ny machibery. Their system OF import duties Is
sou 70 hi. Interviewer country where t3ere are ocroi
duties at rVery town. The Municipal ouncil OF rsrlr,
which c0mprsss OF the reidost Radicals eoe- ""s
M Time 10 tnlnk OF tho nrst necessity OF tns poor
supply or cool waller. The Paris w1ter Is se,.t1 a
pu"lo DANCER. And the Octro duties are i1v'eu o'
precisely those objects OF consumption wEicn arc "o0o'
sdrio- o. ne tO the poor. 80 .,
with REGARD am Isements, the public II rehteu
scanhalOusy" said NJ. Bi0rns0n; In ths tnoaos tne
seats ba ventilation ~pioraOle bus tue TAr
slams Patient; full ~ respect uks the
Euxlisi better they snOs thoroughly nov 20 deiehn
cir Tighs. But for all that, continued NJ n)orn-on
the french thrifty. Industrious anu '"oer peop'e
brave they and that not only on W. hei ~
battle: Frencnusn SOC. tEsi Nc Is ne Viculn OF
al intOer4b injury. lie Il ready without moihrnts
itntiuu die II mead br. fpr MS nonor BUS
and tho inng il oontsous just Imagine their having
forced high hnt-a tnaii VINO never IA us
lie has been able Ia submit 10 this stys OF gear
The French" said Bioruson. ARC an lntelgent race
trnaci0nA When a thing has once taken rUOt win
them II gOes indsnnit-ly They have never sna"sd
the traces OF s Great Revolution The present kepnb
lie takes Us stand upon IT, and AZ for the conservatives
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-10-03
A CALIFORNIA MONSTER.


Another Dig snsks has been seen In CAaverss our
informant i Mr.. A. Lascy. Deputy Uultcd -tstcs
Mineral survey who resides Nest P0int Mr Lsscy
and bis son. Franz wers Trip into the mountains
They had reached point The old einlxrsut rOsd,
near the pig Meadows hr. Lascy ar. PERFECTLY
familiar vita the whole Of that mountain cOuntry. ssd
bad decided ON camping place few niles fur hsr
Bat coming % old lOg caOg O0 the ROAD, la walch
Mr.. Lasoy put up before surveying trips, they
from spring Ia tue gcu below, aud possibly make tnst
theIr camping place. They accordingly stopped tasr
got out. and proceeded explore ths cabin q
10 looked dApldae the roof being partly crushed
In ey weight Of winter Mr. Lascy. folio
by his vent tue 0w cabin door, gEicB closed
but not locked, pushed II open AMI stooI oil 10 easer
when he struck with ;err0s at the ght OF
reptile, which. iHr sZe aud bde0usasss OF appearance
surpassed anything tnat he hs. Or that 10
really believed did sxlst on Land. lie never a be-
lever The big stories he had heart, bat
that particular OF ncrrdUtv that lac ever
possessed rsKsrsiRg these Reports WA completely
knOcked dut at sight OF this hsiDs sfsonen Of
stroas reptile.
The cabin Ia 1916 feet. Ths snake lay stretched
aud tall reaching 10 tia Opposite side and partly
cOiled against some stones that mad been used .or
fireplace With heal elevated anOli three feet from
tile door, aud drawn little rscK~ast Dy the stately
% the neoK evidently NJ IKE for Tie swtns
OF the opening i1Or the huge monster faced ns nruer>
Both carried rides. elder LascY started
back the brought his lie Ia his shoulder and nred
the reptiles lie AL Mr. Lascy. quickly recovering
himself. nred also. ami almost the time Theirs
scslei the walls thu cabin through
opening the ami disappeared. aud ss no was
gong piece Of ais tail fell tom the wall 70 tAs
floor.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-10-03
STRATEGY or TWO BROOKLYN DOGS.
HOW THEY coNsPIRED 70 ROB A FAITHFUL NEW
FOUVDLAND.

HOW THEY CONsPIRED 70 ROB FAITHFUL NEW
FOUVDLAND.
A Brooklyn hon sehoder living near DeKalb-
ava has lat rs Newfoun Hand name PLATE that IS
hi. pride ami delight Pa,s is htI shaggy fellow.
rrnarkaniv intelligence AMI favOrite with everybody
IN the usi gnnni ,pd except couple OF dogs on the
uo II block These hrutes oversrowG m0ngrei black
snd tan and 4 cOis hate him win perfect hatred
a. ever Ioigsd In canine breasts simply hecause hs IL
gopi aud onedirut aud than match for both OF
them IN square night Pilates strong point Is IN run
uicety He will take Asket In his mouth with a list
OF things inside To the grocer, or the butch
srS Ike a model boy ami one unless he Il wearing
An apron can ge' tho basket from nim II is on his
return trips butcnrr's shop tnat the Two
S,rkei dog. make sperta efforts to bother him by
trying tn the contents OF rho Dasget
They never succsedsi In their efforts until the other
day when Chev devised a cunning conspiracy. AS
plate came along with a cnsce Ut OF siroiD IN the
bas black aud furious ATTACK upon
nut contenLel himself with trying u rhaAe Oh br
mover Tho would no. lie shaken on He grew
more violent until Al Last lie Dlppel out a piece OF
Ate halt car a-b d trade dollar hls
nnch for tho NrwfoIndiant With how OF rage and
pain droppei basket AMI IN moment tho black
and au Iouksd n he Isd been over ny dOhble
truck Pst fairly ~tpel the sldewaIk WITH MIN No
soou-r hsi he dropped the basket t1anelJ
grabbed ana Carried away w inc co no
which waiting tor mis- turn of events J at4
saw tbs rtbbrry aud tho whole game AT once u was
= t~rribls bow his priio Ito let the black ana tan
GO picket up The Ia trudgrd slowly home ia
ed sort at enough he Ully ie"llzsI
that he had mane the victim OF baae and cruel
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-10-03
BLlCK SY4KES DEVOTION

FTOrlHI LfFTfT y IHf FTIfIuHfVHiH IIDtfF
When Avlns lOSn u PLutt ksssa said . nativel
had A black snake thtt treato Just n 10
Of family Il nat growrd up with yDu might
for NY boys had a"ght when it Ogiy about foot
long got 70 be four f.eL AueI the children
INTO the yard tor frOc or on uuntn- or nsh
lug they always Beu-which was tue uains ~ mo
snakc-aiOug lie was very useful ia every way too.
some days the boys would out after lere- VI via
grapes aud take nushei basket with en- Zen would
coil up BASKET aul too. We'll. n they re1 is
basket generally dd. 10 made pretty hefy
carry. thoyd Just SHOW Tue snake wat
WIS wanted he'd fssteu hl- head Oh tue ,iis tao
basket sud hi- Tall tother. making another hannle
az Ia speak aud. we'll four oi my Toys would carry tho
loaI acme without sweating auy Of eu TOO inuch.
brsr berries they hal, Zen N"Hi hrip stem
pick the bTirrs au sticks snd art from en- Ia
that stud u handy A. t@n-year-od saL
When ths boys vent 1rhins Ben woaid lay dOwn IN
the bat aud 20 asleep. uui when they gt through
AUDI pnlel he'd wake yaWn Little AMI then
sretoh out straight. Tor nr knew hs place IN tas
procession was waiting Tor hun The boys arays Used
aim Ia string .heir FISH o. then wOu1 take lm
bv the head aud tail and tueT hal ss
nice a usn cart as YOU 20 see.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-10-03
how JONES LOST HIS RIVER
A PLACID, NON-PARTsAN. SLIGHTLY INAcCCRAT TX
But VERY PHILOSOPHICAL RFvIEw.

But VERY PHILOSOPHICAL REVIEW.
from me Republican,
Mr. George Jonen The Netc York 7afe
Wa. tho PATTON o. Lieutenant roh~~kas exploring e1pe'
ami The grateful lieutenant accordingly named
stream h- Northern Alaska Jones IiVeI'
after tiie great New York Mugwunp
IL IL nuuo eS-ary say tie Mugwump stream was
distinguished attention Uy the Mugwump Jour
nai lumber editorial were devoted 10 Its geo
graphical Importance and Mr jones happy IN beng The
Gully living lug ~up with OF his o"u until Leuirn
Jon-. K's-r shallow and muddy. ds.narging Itself
tent"n Of one of The brilliant young mrn ieit ~
TIe Iork while Charles A Dana tnr venerable
bsn- Jones' family, s taking MS vacation IN uIopo
IN, willing runcrsir'l that shallow mhiIy ana "Is-
u,outed ought 10 b. J"ues uveI bu hrVe ~
ernu.l thai There would be no enduring Mug"unp WIN
viii Jon"S 'ri already ." II -in pal~ne n, 80 NJ
rt a much "o,sr a. p,5a,. a ', W. og Int on the
e%sl sa the % a o ag H @ on he overnnent
map ro'scovering aos INTO remote anulnl
unln nS- u Las se on chart Of y .,r , oT ..
Il defeat has been celebrated Win cSuns '~Ie " bt
uey ea" n1ed Who r,uid 1eip having There
Ive lbe has nov reached stage when Az
bern his ryer but has turned a. Day WIN te as
srron that TO notes ID particular upon se s. been
suee.'--d by tbs rleinpore lying OF 1Tnpos noy
what tent ignorance can make vanity 10 vac.
ana ss na 70 s way az the supposed Of
Jones' iHve 10, All that !, was wyrah 70 Tie ASo' ANU '
n~s. At nr-t received support from us
Sas~a" S,nat re D.i ' as.@f,e It's
nov .aTnfgs against oans oih,, has To- say
10 the dscrsdi! o. Jones vsr yer
Inundated N every that the Triumphant sny o. nes
peIndloa. with all tbs spot. o. Tie world sn
tslsd md debAs simply esose he claimed anS rysr
wump lao ioresd 70 learn A. Ls nersi Of mug
n,osa II promises
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-10-03
Soas ufLLI0NAlRES

Al the opera the other u,slt young newspaper
mAn VINO xuC good uauy people. 10 sat Ia tree
seat alfred IN borrowed dress suii, ana Win osfry
enough casn ia hs p0osst, ~ pay the 100 cream aLi
strescAr tue elegant young lady 81 good fanny
aud duo who lad ace eptrd Ms oscuri
Bet y-sn tue he begged BE- excused, AMI retired
for 10 tho foyer. whore no was sre1 ia
con 70 with large. psiI LOOKING man and .
hau with . Drosn mustacn-
don't Ike speak Of such tIibgs ne sara Y" mo
Young lady % returning to his sea-. 9 thlnA that
io.stlng Of wealth Il sOoat he most HuisAf lang
uu: Tut t IL a singular cO,netdence that willie was
staining IN Tho foyer Just NV two gentehcn cAe up
and entered tntO conversation with me. As We we're
.lsiag nappenad Z, Ibnk that the three OF us we're
worth four million ami a Laf a0ll srs
Iadeed I" querisd ne !siy. who nad not known mn
long. ,., 60.
= Ye- Marshall field q worth three millions. Seofgs
ruln.a on. million and think could manage - scare
an ths other haf dollar myself
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-10-03

fgmes. noble and otherwise, which wsrs er3upsd
round the Monarchy have kept all their trsdisicna
rhs Republicans have overthrown the ancient rsams
but 10 yss all the same Here you see tho oonserv-
stism OF the From the social and seon0ns point
OF view. the third Republic has merely continued the
E.prs. WHOM In Its turn merely con tiuued Mon
arohy o. July. Under all governments |, v the nch
bo1rgeoisie that dominates Frsnsh society"
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-10-03
YR G0rIr


FroU1 The DefrJN IRE, Prfsf.
Say he called out ts ne ran 1Psai-s and entered
the first Office 10 the rignt, d" rs 10 true -
WHAT ." calmly Inquired the occupant
That you nave declined 10 allow your name 10 he
used in the Congressional race
Well-ahem -yOu-"
Then a. Is true. and have won a new hat But say
what Earth could have possessed you 20 decline.
when she nomination would have been mere form, and
sue election a certainly "
But a. was going 90 remark, ~
on, certAiuly-lrivats business honors enough-an
eye the GOvernursip and all that. nut your reI is
will 10 disappointed all tile same. We wanted a
the pee. OF any that august body Too Dad-re.y
TOO bad"
Yes-shsm," coushed the other, who couldn't come
within forty niles OF declining nomination., y0a
spoke to me tho other day sDOut-lcts secf"
"On. yes, id want a losn Of s@j. Dut sarmlshei
around aud
certainly can have IL. ana double the amount 10
wish, an n don happen 10 he Hush az the end
OF thirty lays take sixty. Yes my private business
very pressing yes-ahem-t.lk Win you agdla-"
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-10-03
CURRENT ANECDOTES.
n DID E0r JUMP
Ro1a T1< Dsfvesf ~ Hvsss-

story window In unfinished suldns 90 Grand rive.
p end seemed 70 begin preparations 10 commit ssco
~ lsapins 70 she pavement Of fosfy or ef4
people speedily gathered in hs.r-eircs Dslov -
asnousn al s~smsd 20 he aware Of whss gsins e
rot voice vss raised % the ezrryis6
out Ills desena hs removed his coat and looked fowS
as estimating The distance Then he removed his vs1
and looked down again.
Some OF the crowd sskef each In loo tones N N
Intention was ~ lump and we're answered hat there ws
no doubt OF IL The man removed his and ito afs
his vest and then spit nis han e. poso0
square In the window. No one below novel z foot
There was bali minute OF silence dnrar which every.
oody mentally calculated the exact spot he voato
euiks anf somethinz like shadder passed ~
crowd Inen tie unknovn man spit % nis hands ouoo
more raised them above bis head and calmly remsrks1s
NJ friends, this Il 10 inform you that shall occupy
tnis ouidink November with large and Tsi-selscts4
stocs OF staple and fancy groceries saau do Q strictly
casa business. aud II viii 10 my to-"
But the last one had turned Inc corner
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-10-03
TEE TRRrFTY FARMER


You know we nave pretty Que shed attached 20 o1R
store said ,he grocer. II s about 100 Long sn4
Win the councillors yard II 10 o valuable pisss q
property aud although We pay nearly $1,000 yeae
rent Tor H. II 10 tree she'd One day lsst fsraaoe
drove under the shed with span OF horses which no
ted, and then came In the store. lie wanted to seu
eggs He asked what We we're paying. and l Told ain
VI - hundred, cash or trade. .s he desired
Won't sell my eggs for any sieh rrice, szf tho
farmer. '.Pll git more o. take 'em home fust
sorry, my FREUD but thu market does warrant
us paying any more replied. and soon the fArmas
could ne seen vita huge basket Of under arm
and proceeded 70 sell them from house 10 house ID
about two hours he returned With empty baskets.
when he came In asked; Did you do aay betsss
than oferedr
No, ter shilins seemed 10 bs bout the price 90
did not bring them back again. Guess tried bnndrs4
places. Got aay oats 10 sell. boss told John pue
some in the wagon tore left home for the bosses. bus
he forgot 10, guess.
Il told him that had oats, and that quarts were
worth ~ cents.
- welvs centsi Do you want 70 rob q mani
told him IL cents the bcs' could do. and 10
said Blank III ~ cents FOR SIX quarts Of oaiA
and he vent away and soon returned With tho oats.
Get oats Tor less asked him a. he wac passing
under the shed where lie had kept his horses
= Got em for 'leven cents Was a,Esd the same yca
did but told the man being a. hal my horses under
your shed I'd you tia preference. but he'd como
down TO 'lsven cents would make decker he cane
down 70 lsgen. l tell you Xlaeston people want 70
ses rich too fast
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-10-03

story corridOrs OF the fifth Avenue
Hotel tho othsr evening 10 illustrate the PRACTICAL
Shrs wdnsss AID cure for details OF Henry Irving Mr.
lrvngs theatre London repsinted and return ishod
vet sprinx Before the PAINT some 81 the pillars
hal sufhcisnty dried the house was reopeneh among
I've audience, tho nrst lila LserpocI EercAAht
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-10-03

He happened TO lean against pillar and cot lot of
paint his coat Feeling annoyed he wrote nots TO
M Irving next day telling him what had happened ami
suggesting that be used in the theatre The
following day TO ns great surprise received letter
from the famous actor apolOg for the mshap and
nclosing G5 note tn bur new dress coat
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-10-03
WILD woMhy sol so vssr SCARCE


II vas on MsiisOn- at. ear The d-iFPr Vas rat rrt
IN IN. f.cs and solemn Loosug around 20 toe solitary
smoker who stOOd there. he SAID;
500 tnst they have found Wild woman do"n "a
Pennsylvania 49,. . A..
sYss" r-pisd the smoker, Who ala not propose 70
have any ancient gsg PLAYED on hlin -,
The driver riveted his ewes 90 tue hors~s ahd MAUI
profound silence Until 40 lad crossed TAG osIsss
tut th.t lint nothing, mister. You can see via
woman any .y on tie West side when he car don s.g
N Ao middle OF Tue block OH on bhore' no" VI" ~
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-10-03
! Really Can't

p.~r IN t. the benefit derived RON that pecuar me.k
csaa oac ,-r,AyA1 ssfss -y Who lad ss"a 81 ufei
go, .,.,..t r--ty Ia give ap" Why. gave ace NE
c.,,.axth .. nAgdly that DAY. fot rae anoth~r
conan Recommend Il blood purner and tonic
I ka-v o.
words snoush On cypress nv feoinx
IN rsvor If sar-~ps<A a. cured Of sp~es-.
-trb which Z .unsr-a MY yeAsa" MRs s. n. nKEDE
N1rosh.-d Mz<a
M, a.ashtsr benea nom thr USE Of esas
ssrs-v.riis sftsr ysotrs>i stt>ns II
sroushi.i gAsumonA" REv. n. A ADAMS. sowiint
fsrd "
Hoods Sarsapariila
Sold BY drasnsts 81 oottios is 90 pspArsi euv
By O 1 HOOD a co. AposhecArs~. LSseiL Ma
100 Doses One Dollar
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-10-03
TEE sooUyDRhL REoooyExsn

PROM me Dstron fre> Ffess .-...-.
young msn !" shoutel Tue ret-n Spsoey', ,
didn't ! 60 t0n you - keep your eJes pscio1 ior
piu9xei silver cOus
Yea sir" e.. ~. 49,, .. -.
,sA.n IN mi. sftsrnoou walIs ( WA cut.
Yes. sir knew dli. ..
You knew II va. plugged and yet yor accepted 10 ="
-Yes sir hsdt tus moral SOurA<s ~ reiuse.
ION, you sadBtt Well. Oh saturday ie"t you can
rass your pay aud 10. I iont want boy mere who
-ils let q sc0nndr-l Impose On him IN that tAshwas
Would yoa Eno ~ desi icsbis il.ia .eain ~
GU y.s sir. sEow MIA veil
Who ws.itt"
Your fathef."
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1886-01-29

The best located
town in Southern
Dakota, being stu
ated near the CEN
ter Of Brule County,
in the midst Of the
best farming and
stock country III
the world. The
proof Of which has
been fully demon
strated in the mag
niticent crops of the
past few years.
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1886-01-29
A Confederate Giants Sword.
ON tha Washington Ratchet.

From tina Washington Hatchet.
Among the relics of the late wa,
slowed away i'll the United States Ord.
name Museum on seventeenth-st, is
a sabre fully five feet long, which was
found on the battlefield OF Manassas
This formidable looking weapon was
evidently made in some village black.
smiths shop, from the tabled pillow.
share, at the outbreak of the war, and
its handle appears to have been carved
with a jack knife from a cows horn
A Virginian who visited the museum
recognized the sabre as one that had
been used by a giant Virginia cavalry.
man in Job" Stuart's command.
.'The cavalryman in question:" said
the Virginian to The Ratchet, twas
nearly even feet high and broad in
proportion. He had that big sabre
made by crossroads horseshoer and
promised to hew his way through the
Yankee lines with it and enter Wash.
ington, but, poor fellow, he was shot
at Manassas beforeh he could carry out
his rash purpose"
The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1886-01-29
Third-Clnss Natter.

SET it amt writtin' IN ii amt print
in, wat kinder stamps do you put on?"
gucried ar urchin, whose head barely
reached to the window ledge, at the
postotlicc yesterday.
The clerk at the stamp window smiled
at the Youngsters question and winkcd
in evident enjoyment at the bystanders.
Then he said:
Sonny | suppose you've got third
Il dunno was the dubois reply.
The clerk laughed and repeated his
winks at the interested spectators who
had overheard the dialogue.
Well he said finally, and mimick-
ing the boys manner, ''ef it amt writ
tin an it amt printin'. ! guess we'll
have to call it third-class matter and
send il along for you pretty cheap.
What does it weigh?n
'Nuthin'.@ SAID the boy, and his
mouth stretched into II grin that threat
ened to fracture his cars.
"~Nothings" repeated the clerk.
"Ynmp." muttered the boy, rcelino
his smile slightly.
''ln that case. then, sonny said the
clerk, with hilarious animation. "we'll
send your package through for Moth
ing
Sure pop?' questioned the boy, as
he edged back & little from the window.
Sure pop repeated the clerk. II
pledge the honor of the government.
Hand over the matter that weighs moth
ing"
Hero it is. mister and. the boy
pushed an inflated toy balloon through
the window opening. mind yer, III
hold the gov'ment 'sponsible-yer said
o And then the boy and the spec
tators, did the laughing and the wink
ing and the clerk devoted himself to
chunks of language which weighed
more than the mailable four pounds nj
lowed by law.-Hi2adetphia Press.