The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1886-12-25
SMART Mr.. ROWSER.
Mrs. BOwser Tells How He Solved the
S, rvant-GirI Question.

AhObIlCI LHluO dDUuI hE. IROWSST
his lofty concelt about matters in gen.
eral and over me in particular. He
goes about talking of his house, his fur
nlture, has taste, and all that Just as if
he had never heard of me. The other
week, when the cook walked off at half
an hours notice, and Bowser came
home to find dinner half an hour late,
he crossed his hands under his majestic
coat-tails, walked up and down like
some great lord. and finally said:
Mrs. Bowser it's the fault of your
management! know that this kitchen
can be run on the same system as a
bank, and its got to be done Yes, got
to be done, Mrs. Bowser."
You'd better run il, them 1 re-
piled.
80 will, MADAME
That day he advertised in the papers,
and after supper the girls began ar
irving. Mr.. Bowser seated himself in
state in the parlor, and showed them
in. His manner and speech were about
the same in each case.
Young woman" he began, "are
you naturally neat. systematic, accu-
rate, honest, capable, willing, indus
trious and handy?''
ayes, sir"
Can you give bonds in the sum of
SCOOP"
mo. sir.''
"Then do not want you"
He was home all next day, during
which time about twenty girls called
and were sent away. He finally got
fiHNI Is ho,,l
cepted girl and CHANGED her integrity.
Before proceeding to show her to the
kitchen, Mr.. Bowser loftily observed:
Young woman, your path of duty
will lead you all over my house, and
you will De expected to do your work
in cheerful manner and to n1y salts
faction. | want perfect system in every
thing, from peeling potatoes to using
up exactly three pounds of butter per
week. We will now made an examina-
ton of the quarters you are to occupy
He escorted her to the kitchen and
showed her an egg beatar, bar of
soap, horseradish crater and a
celery dish, and informed her that he
would perhaps. furnish her with tack
hammer in case she wanted to throw
herself on some new French dish He
charged her to be up at exactly six
O'Clock in the morning, and to ring the
bell at exactly seven, and to have the
table cleared off by eight, and then
came in and said to me:
"Mrs. Bowser, this house is to be run
on system after this. You won't know
this place by tomorrow n ght.
ado you think the girl will stay?" 1
ventured to ask.
STAY! l tell you. the whole trouble
about the servant girl question lies in
the fact that you women are no mana,
gers. That girl will remain here twenty
years. unless sooner discharged"
Ibid she seem pleasedP'
"PleasedP Well, | should smile! A
girl knows when she has competent
boss"
Next morning at n quarter to eight
Mr. Bowser suddenly awoke and Jumped
out of bed. That bell, which was to be
rung at seven o'clock had not aroused
us. We hurried out to the djning-room.
but the table had not yet been set We
entered the kitchen, but there was no
fire.
''Mr, Bowser," said I, "your system
seems to be out of gear
He made no reply, but hurried up
stairs, and heard the following con-
versation:
Bowser-"Jane Jane"
Girl-"What is it?'
''Do YOU know what time it is?"
yes"
"And why amt you down stairs?"
Il never get down until eight"
"But didn't tell you to get up at six"
odds is the difference if you id.
don't take orders from an old hem
hussy?"
He marched her of as soon as she
came down, and, because he saw Il grin
on my face, he exclaimed:
Don't think I'm beat, Mrs. Bowser!
I'll cook breakfast mysclfr'
He broke some eggs into a cold
spider without using any butter, and
they burned fast He put his coffee to
steep in cold water, and settled it with
some of the fried egg. He put the
butter on in fish platter, broiied the
mackerel without soaking, and his
Saratoga chips and pancakes got mixed
up in some strange way. He went off
without saying any thing and that
afternoon hired a girl and had good
supper awaiting him.
Mrs. Bow ,sr,' he said, asjhe leaned
back in his chair and slipped his tea |
told you it was all in the management!
If it wasn't for me where would this
house have been tonight? Learn firm
ness and management from me, Mrs.
Bowserm --DetrOI Free Press.