davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
Tha nnrninr Anil

The coming girl will cook her
own food, will earn her own living
and will not die an old maid. The
coming girl will not wear the Gre
clan bend, dance german, ignore all
possibilities of knowing how TO
work, will not endeavor to break
the hearts of unsophisticated young
ren, will spell correctly, understand
English before she affects French,
will preside with equal grace at the
piano or wash-tub, will spin more
yarn for the house than for the
street, will not despise her plainly
clad mother, her poor relations, or
the hands of an honest worker; will
wear a bonnet, will darn her own
stockings and not read the story
paper oftener than she does her
bible.
The coming girl will walk five
miles a day if need be to keep heI
cheeks aglow; will mind her health,
her physical development and her
mother; will adopt costume both
sensible and conducive to health
will not confouud hypocrisy with
politeness; will not place lying to
please above frankness; will have
courage to cut an unwelcome &C
quaintance; will not think refine
ment French duplicity; that the as.
sumed hospitality, where hate
dwells in the heart, is better than
condemnation; will not confound
grace of government with silly af-
fiction; will not regard the end Of
her being to have a beau.
The coming girl will not look to
Paris but to reason for her fash
ions; will not aim TO follow a fool
ish fashion because milliners ant
dressmakers decree it; will not tor
ture her body, shriVel her soul will
puerilities, or ruin it with wine anC
pleasure 10 short, the coming cir
will seek to glorify her Maker and
to enjoy mentally His works. Duty
will be her aim and life a Twin!
reality.-Household.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
BROTHER GARDNER.
Some Short Summer Sermons by the Sage
Of the Limekiln Club.

A lawyer will work harder to
break the law dan to enfO'ce it.
1t am easier to govern state dan
to boss a Sunday skule picnic.
De man who gives you thirteen
cents for a shillin' will bOrry your
tea an cofy an pay muffin back.
A photographer doan' show de
deviltry in a mans eye nor de PIN
pies on a woman's face.
De mo- good clothes you kin heap
on your hack the less your bad
grammar will be commented on.
De aim of de philanthropist am
not TO preserve de good eggs, but
to work de bad ones over an palm
'em off agin.
De room which a man takes up
on de sidewalk is no criterion to
judge of de amount of brains in his
head.
You can't hear de jingle of gold
pieces half as fur as you kin lear
de rattle of tin pans.
De man who announces his own
honesty sometimes gifts into Canada
wild de Doodle, and sometimes he am
caught in Detroit or Buffalo.
Let two lifelong friends begin a
discushun as to de color of Adam
hair or de size of Noah's head an
de chances fur q row is fust class.
What men doan' know am what dey
refuse to let go of.
Sift down de talk of de worlds
greatest men an when you come to
extract de bigotry, egotism, preju
dice and self-interest, you will have
to look fur de quotient wild spy.
glass.
When a man sots out to be purity
he mustn't blame his halter for any
sbrinkage of his head. AS de boss
sense oozes out de cranium has got
TO contract.
Doan' worry ober de theory o
transmigrashun. When you an
turned into an old white boss an
sot to work grindin' bark in a tan
merry it will be time to complain be
kase you wasn't turned into a tan
ner instead.
Luv am a beautiful sentiment, an
de game of three keerd monte am {
swindle, but fifty people are down
ed by luv for cherry one swindled by
the keerds.
Industry am a rack in which dar
am always a peg to hang up ont
mo- workin'-man's coat.
When you come to let de gas on
of balloon you am surprised an
disguised at de shrinkage.
One-half de great men expec
DER speeches to be read by posteri
ty an DER debts to be paid by del
chilpen.-Detroit Free Press.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
Indian Fishing Spears.

The fishing spears used by the
Piute Indians are of peculiar con
struction. Into the end of a pole
or shaft from twelve to fifteen feet
in length is inserted a piece of iron
or steel wire about as thick as an
ordinary lead pencil and about ten
inches long; the end of this wire
is made quite sharp. Another piece
of wire about two inches long forms
the harb. One end of this short
piece of wire is made very sharp.
1t is then laid upon the point of the
long wire and tightly dashed with a
piece of pitched Irvine. In the CEN
tire of the piece of short wire is fas-
tened n string over q foot in length,
which is made fast to the shaft of
the spear. When a fish is struck
the point of the sphere passes en-
tirely through its body. In with
drawing it the short wire or barb
pulls of, and, turning crosswise,
the fish is securely fastened and
hangs dangling to the handle of the
smear.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09

Three of them were killed, their
bodies buried and heads left outside
Just back of the tent. After the of
ficers' set had got the well seasoned
stew disposed of, the little puppy re-
naming alive was left at the off
GERS tent and began to whine. They
Investigated the whining at once
and found the little fellow with a
card to his neck upon which was
inscribed:
"You have eaten my three broth
ers; now eat me. (Signed)
JEFF DAVIS"
In the expressive language of the
colored gentleman, there was COM
motion in that camp. Investiga.
ton followed, the puppies heads
were discovered-and-we draw a
veil over the scene that followed.
A puppy's whine, bark or even a
howl, was altogether too suggestive
for a long time after. The boys
stews were not confscated any
more.
The disagreeable results of the
affair were entirely the effects OF
the imagination, as the stew which
the officers confscated was entirely
composed of good chickens anG
pigs.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
HUMOROUS.

A rough drawing slugger pull
ing cart.
Organ grinders motto: Turn
about is fair play.
A man may have no ear for mu.
sic, yet have mind TO play.
An unavoidable breach of the
piece: The stock of gun.
Superior court-going it sweet
on one of the dear creatures worth
100000.
You can never depend upon pro.
verbs. One says, "Silence is golden"
Another, Money talks"
Mamma" cried a five year-old
girl, 81 started to make my doll 6
bonnet and it's come out a pair Of
pants"
''Look here, Judge" said the bur.
glar, 81 amt so bad as you think ]
am. Only give me time and I'll re
FORM" And the Judge gave him
fifteen years.
A mathematical calculation ha:
shown that if the muscles of a mar
were relatively as strong as those
of a flea he could throw a book
agent two miles.
"Mercy!" exclaimed Mrs. Home
spun, when she read in the paper
that Jay Gould made ten cents every
time the clock licked; Il should
think he'd be worried to death fol-
fear the clock would run down"
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
Sweets for the Sweet.

When young lady says she has
two strings to her bow she means
that she has two beaux to her
string.
Alaska women cure babies of cry
ing by taking them to the sea shore
and holding them in water until
they are silent.
The young lady who can peel a
potato in five seconds is as useful
as the young woman who speaks
five languages is ornamental.
The principal beauty of the Nor
man religion is that the same wo-
man doesn't have to get up the en-
tire winter to build the kitchen
fire.
A woman that takes all the fash
ion magazines generally goes to a
dressmaker to learn what is new in
the fashions and never makes her
own dresses.
Many women think they are do
nestle If they stay at home to en-
terrain company, while their hus-
bands think they are as little do
nestle at home as abroad.
AnUld widower says: When you
pop the question to a lady, do it
with kind of laugh, as If you were
joking. If she accepts you, very
good; if she does not, you could
say you were only in fun.
II thought, Miss s., that you hat
ed that hirty mink; yet you went
up and kissed her." $50 L do hate
her, and that is why 1 did it. Look
at the freckles on her chin where l
kissed the powder off,
(Which side of the street do you
live Oh, Mrs. Kipple?" asked a
counsel, cross-examining witness.
"Oh, either side, sir; if you go one
way it's on the right side; if you go
the other way it's on the left.''
eff We place, mum, the cook has
boorned her hand an axes to be
excused fur a few days, fur it's
most crazy she is wild PAIN "In-
Decd Bridget, III do nothing of the
sort. l expect to dinner tomorrow
several prominent members of the
society for the prevention of cruel
ty to animals and the cook must do
her work or find another place, pain
or no pain"
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
How Italians Cure the Earaohe.

A remedy, one unequalled indeed,
for tearache is that in use among
the sailors and bathers at Viareg-
go and Leghorn, and indeed all
along the coast Of that part ofItaly.
A piece of linen is spread with
melted bees wax-the purer the
better-and then rolled tightly into
cOrCucopia shape, the small end of
which is introduced into the pa
TENTS ear as he lies down. The
cornucopia should not be less than
three, four, or even five inches long.
Flannel clothes are then laid over
the head and face, the cornucopia
is set alight and burns slowly as
long as the patient can bear it, until
burned quite near the face when it
is removed from the ear. This pro-
ceeding gives almost instant relief
and if the pain happens to have
been caused by the presence OF any
foreign substance in the ear it will
come away with the cornucopia.-
London Society.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
Saw Some Snakes.

AS the afternoon train on the
Florida Transit railway slowed up
to a water tank where a creek flows
out of dreary cypress swamp and
crosses the way, hunter in high
boots and corduroy coat, with 8
huge bag swung to his broad shout
ders, climbed out of the tall grass
and boarded the principal passen
ger car. 1t was Prof. James Bell,
the Smithsonian Institution agent.
The train was full of people who for
three hours had endured the inno-
cent babble of two guileless land
agents. They had learned from
these truthful real estate missiona-
ries that afligators were as harm
less as geese, and there were fewer
snakes by far in Florida than in
New York City or Philadelphia.
The professor found the one vacant
seat and flung himself into it.
"Good afternoon, professor"
said an acquaintance at the further
end of the car cried out to him; ''do
you have any luck catching snakes
these days?''
And within five minutes Mr.. Bell
was answering questions from near
ly every occupant of the car. Were
there really any snakes in Floridaf
Was it safe to go through the
woodsp How big did the snakes
grow in this state? What sort OF
snakes are common here? etc. Very
graciously the professor answered
them all and soon had betrayed
himself into a dissertation upon
reptiles generally, till in an absent
way, just to illustrate a point, he
uDbottoned a capacious pocket in
the skirt of his coat and drew GU tan
enormous and newly caught "coach
whip" which he exhibited to s
throng of staring and excited PEG,
pie. Its thabits and peculisrlties
were described and he laid his sub
ject on the seat and from another
pocket drew out number of chick.
en-snakes of various kinds. Would
they bite? No, indeed; they were
harmless. They looked kind of
''crawly," they were so small.
He replaced them and unstrapped
his game bag. "Here we have" he
said, ga beautiful snake naturally
tame and perfectly harmless, which
anybody can play with" And he
drew out what is probably the big
gest king-snake ever caught in Flor
ida-neaIly eight fee: long.
There was a chorus of screams,
and women and children, men even,
fed to the further end of the car.
During the rest of the trip the dis
concerted professor sat alone, and
when at Gainesville he arose to
leave the train little girls hid them
selves behind their mammas and
screamed with fright.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
Too Much Imagination,

A recent story in the Chicago
Ledger remiads a correspondent
belonging to the Second Vermont
volunteers of the folio wing:
Our officers had given US strict
orders against foraging, Col. RAN
dali and Capt. Whitney, of Co. H,
were especially severe. In spite OF
orders the boys used to pick up
young pigs, abundant in that vicin-
ity, and work them up into "possum
stews." The captain CHANGED to
discover that the boys game of
which their stews were made was
contraband, and he at once confis
Gated a fine stew and hsdthe own
ers arrested.
Now the captain was great low
er of poker and he and his set re-
called themselves with poker and
the soldiers stew. The boys resolv-
ed to get even. In the natural or
der this event happened twice. The
second time it was essentially vari-
ed, as follows:
Four puppies had been procured.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
Some Of the souudest advice which

Some of the soundest advice which
has been given young people this
year is in the address by NJ. Renan
at Paris, 1t is worth the consider
alton of both young and old. He
says, among other words, "Joy and
work are two healthy things. Work
then, work necessarily, but amuse
yourselves, too. DO not fatigue
yourselves. Rest yourself from one
kind of work by another. Have va
rious subjects of study. An old
rabbi of the first century said: One
can pour several measures of oil
into Il barrel full of nuts How
true this is! Aspire to know every
thing; the limits will come later on.
Be always thoroughly good and re-
spectacle young men; if you are
not, you cannot work well, nor even
amuse yourselves well. One must
lead a good life to possess gayety
of mind"
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
learning a Trade.

1t is not uncommon for a me-
chanic to allude to the period dur
ing which he served his apprentice
ship as "the time when / learned
my trade; but how many mechan-
les are there who can truly say that
they did learn their trade during
that term? Very few. 1t is pre-
clsely as il man were TO allude TO
his school-days as the time when
he obtained his education. The
man who does not learn more in a
corresponding space of time follow
ing his course of study under di
rect instruction, than he did dur
ing that course, is a person of very
small capabilities. The course of
study, whether in books or tools,
that one pursues to fit him for his
after-life is like the foundation
OF = house which is laid to
support and strengthen the super
structure, and the more thoroughly
the foundation is laid the better
the superstructure that can be
built upon it. There are in trade,
as in every other walk in life, some
who learn nothing and forget moth
ing; bnt they are not the persons
who advance the business interests
of the community. In every branch
of trade styles are constantly chang
ing and improvements making and
the craftsman who is not prepared
to meet and study them as tn ey
arise will very speedily find him
self in the rear-'left." What is
termed ''learning trade" is merely
a course of study that teaches one
how to learn, just as knowledge of
the alphabet is key to all knowl-
edge of the trade, alphabet is key
to all Observation-Disclosures.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
Sharpers Outwitted.

There is sharper's game which
has been played for the last hun
dred years, and as the turning
point is avarice the game works
forty-nine times where it fails once.
Two sharperS set out few weeks
ago TO play it on a Wayne county
farmer. One of them came alon Q
one day and wanted to buy a farm.
AS the farmer wanted to sell it was
quite easy to strike a bargain. The
price was to be $4,000 in cash, and
the man handed over $3.50 to bind
the bargain. Within two days a
second stranger came along and
wanted the farm. He wanted it so
bad that he couldn't stand still. He
found indications of coal, natural
gas and oil, and he was willing to
give $4,000 for the place. The idea
was, of course, that the farmer
would be awful sick of his first sale
and seek to buy the man of. 1t
would pay him to offer the man
ST, 500 to release him.
The second stranger was only out
of sight when the first one turned
up again. His mouth watered OYER
the prospect, but not for long. The
farmer explained that he had been
offered $4,000 more, and added:
'But don't care for money. The
$4,000 is enough for me and its all
the old farm is worth. When you
are ready TO pay the balance we'll
make out the papers"
The purchaser offered to release
him for ST, NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.,
but the farmer didn't want to be
released. He hung to the bargain
money, and he's got it yet, while
the pair of sharpers rave and gnash
their teeth every time they think
of the thickness Of his skull.-De-
troit Free Press.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
Suffering Women!
Read What the Great Metho-
dist Divine. and Eminent
Physician Says of
Rr9dfpId'S Female RGUUI9tOrI
ATLANTA. Ga. Feb. 20, IS

ATLANTA, Ca, Feb. 20, 1854.
DIR. J. BnADFIELD: Dear Sir-Some Is
years ago | examined the recipe of Female
Regulator and carefully studied authorities
in regard to it's components and then Gas
well As now pronounce it the most scion
tifc and skillful combination of the really
reliable remed al vegetable agents known to
science, to act directly on the womb and
uterine organs, and the organs and parts
sympathizing directly with these; and /,
therefore. providing a specific remedy for
all diseases of the womb and of the adj AGENT
organs and parts. Yours truly,
JESSE BORING, NJ. D., DID.
Bradfield's Female Regulator is only in :
tended for diseases peculiar to women and
for these is SPECIFIC.
Sold by all druggists. Send for our trea-
tise on the health and Happiness of " oman ,
mailed free, which gives all particulars.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
She KNEW.

Wishing to teach his young
daughter some homemade grammar
an Oakland farmer, DESTROYS of i'm
pressing upon the child the differ
ence between singular and plural
number, said:
what do we say of a young lady
who is not married?'
Instead of the expected answer,
"that she is SINGLE" the pert miss
retorted:
"N say of her that she is going
to be married." and so ended the
first lesson.-San Francisco Alta.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
Thought the Fighting Had Begnu


One hundred anarchists were
drilling in an uptown hall.
Attention! Carry, arms! For.
ward, march,"
"Bang! bang! ziss!"
Seventy five men dashed for the
door and tumbled over each other
down stairs, ten jumped out of the
third-story window, eight tainted,
six fell on their knees and com
menced praying, and one nearly
butted out his brains trying TO
crawl into a mouse hole.
Some one had carelessly dropped
two parlor matches on the floor, and
when they were stepped on and ex-
ploded, the communists, who were
training for fight, thought it had
begun.-Alta California.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09

The dust bath is to the fowl what
the wash bowl is to the individual
With the dust bath the hen cleaus
her body. She uses it also for ex
ercise. When hen is incubating
she comes off as regularly to dust
herself as to feed, instinct teaching
her that it is the best of methods
for Kidding herself of lice.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09

AID ordinary beetle can draw
twenty times the weight of the body
and a large horned beetle, which
was carefully weighed and allowed
to work unmolested beneath a bell
glass, drew A 2-10 times its Own
weight.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
Suffering.

"Yes," said the lady lecture
women have been wronged fof
age they have suffered in tho
ands of ways"
There's one way they have '.ee
er suffered in" said a henpeckee
man, rising.
What is that?" demanded thi
lectur9r.
"They have never suffered in 81
lence. boston Courier.
The common herring is Difficult
to procure and preserve alive il
inland aquaria, it being so delicate
that the loss of even few scales j!
sure to cause it's death.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09

The first printing done In Ameri-
ca was IN the city of Mexico, in
1889. There were then 200 print
ing presses in Europe. The second
press was set up in Lima, Peru, and
the third in Cambridge, Mass, in
1899
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
Ayer's SarsqpaTM,
GrafemIness,
PREPARED BY
ORD. c. Aver & Co., Lowell, Mass
Sold by all Druggists: Price 81;
Six bottles for 50.


Mr.. H. Sampsel, Ottawa, Kansas,
writes CDR. S. b. HARTMAN s. Co.,
Columbus, O.-GentIemen have suf-
fered for seven years ; have tried every
thing and many physicians, and all have
failed. went to Pittsburgh, and while
there fell on the street, my breath seemed
to leave my lungs, and numbness over
power me. 1 determined to give PERUNA
and MANALIN fair trial. used four bot
ties of each, and my trouble left, never,
hope, to return. l left Pittsburgh three
weeks ago for Kansas, and thought, as
was going to a new country, l had better
take a bottle of MANALIN with me, on
account of bad water, etc. I arrived
here with one-half bottle. l found one
of my friends in a pretty bad condition.
The doctors were treating her for Chills
and fever. / did not know what her
trouble was, though 1 persuaded her to
use the MANALIN. She did so, and the
first day she was up doing her work
Now this seems strange, but it is, never
theless, a candid truth. She used it all,
and has never had cause to lie down
during the day since she took the first
three doses"
A Case that was Pronounced In
durable.
Miss c. c. Peck, ia Jackson street,
Milwaukee, Wis, writes "DR. S. B.
HARTMAN & Co.-Gentlemen : take
great pleasure in stating to you the benefit
I received from your valuable PERUNA.
1 have been suffering for about fifteen
years with a severe cough and bronchitis
$50 the doctors call it). 1 was treated by
different physicians, and spent considera-
BILE money for different kinds of patent
medicines, but received no benefit what
ever. DR.. Fox, of this city, claimed 1
had consumption, and there was no hope
for me ever getting better. / was so bad
that coughed almost continually. Mrs.
Henry Ellis, a friend of mine, induced
me to try your PERUNA. 1 am happy
to say began to notice change after l
had taken my second bottle. l took
eight bottles in all, and now l feel like
new woman. If it hadn't been for Pc
RUNA l think 1 would be in my grave
now. 1t is a wonderful remedy, and
recommend it to all my friends"
Messrs. Baker Bros, Mt. Vernon, o.,
write A." Your PERUNA sells well. Gus
toners speak of it as being good medi-
cine"
Mr.. Daniel r. Spry, Portsmouth, o.,
writes: 81 have good trade in PERUNA.
It sells well and gives satisfaction"
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
The Mirror

is no fatterer. Would you
make it tell a sweeter tale1
Magnolia Balm is the charm
er that almost cheats the
looking-glass.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09
Time Affairs All Things.

ClaIa-"Do you remember Jane
Crudfie who went to school with
usY
Dora-"The girl with the cat-eyes
and pug-Dose?"
ayes"
"Big MOUTH"
"Yes."
mo chin, no forehnad, red hair
and complexion like a half baked
brick?'
"The same"
Il should think / did. What a
gawk she was. Heard of her lately p
Yes; she's the reigning American
beauty in Paris this week. News.
The Pulaski citizen. [volume] (Pulaski, Tenn.) 1866-current, 1886-09-09

Ubtnined, and OF IA M EUSINEsS
attended 10 for EODEEATE p EE
Our Office IS opposite tic Us Pntont Cfice
and we cun obiain Patents 10 ics.-fine than
chose remote from W ASHIHGTON.
Send MODEL OR DRAWN G. Wo advise
o. 20 patentabilitv free of charge; on 2 up
MAKE no CHARGE UNLESS PATENT
Is SECURED.
We refer, here. TO tho ToslmAster, the
Supt. OF the Money Order Iiv and TO off,
cials Of tho U. s. Potent Cfisc. For Uircu-
lar, advice, terms ana fo!.Ioi ccs TO acton,
clients in your own State OF County, y rfto Il
&. a. So OW q co.
Opposite Patent Office, wasliirrifn, D