The Washington critic., 1886-02-01

me that he was not Il waiter, aud the
nest instant his name came TO my mind
Good hcavcns had the floor opened
and swallowed me out Of sight il would
have been boon. get faint when
think of mistaking my husbands
friend for waiter. He laughed 50
that rallied and said; My dear Mr..
Blank, can YOU forgive me? But |
Dcmonct men are so handsome and so |
gontlemanly, and OH these dress coats |
make no distinction Mt ALL Then ] |
asked him to give me his arm, and we |
went down together, But, my dear, |
if live thousand years I'll never for
get that terrible mistake. Something |
must be done about the dress coat. |
Some of the walters are so swell in |
their good clothes and good manners
that there's no knowing them from
gentlemen sometimes. If some man of
influence would only start in with knee
brccches, | believe there would be
revolution, and the dress coat put down
or relcgatcd exclusively to walters.
Who knows how soon | shall err in the
the other direction, and apologize TO
waiter for calling him gentleman. In
Washington they are so much alike,
you know.
%v$
The following from the Elmra
GdEoto Is none the less clever for pos
sibly being chestnut" \ prominent
divine was the invited guest of Mr.. b.
and family. Miss Alice, the charming
daughter of the host, was gracing the
festivity, and said impulsivcly: ooh,
mother, I've been roasting up in my
room all the afternoon. It's hotter
than" "Alice !" said the father,
stcnly. II say It's hotter than"
"Alicc - said her mother cXcitedly,
and the divine looked at her in alarm
81 say it's hotter than | ever saw it
before" continued the young lady
coolly, "and | just sat there without
thing on" ooh, Alice " said her
father in alarm, This time the divine
was thoroughly frightened. 81 just
sat there without II thing on" "Oh
Alice said the mother, almost cry.
ing. II say | just sat there" con
tinued the girl, not noticing the inter
ruptions, II just sat there without
thing on except my very lightest sum
mer clothing, and read my bible all the
afternoon. VIII you have some more
soup, doctor ;"
@a#
Colonel Wilson of the army, who
now does all tho social functions at the
White House. which have hitherto
been considered as the special attributes
of the District Marshalship, takes great
interest in his duties, and has In the
| short time he has been at the helm
made friendlier connection between
himself and those he introduces than
| ex-Marshal MacNIichael succeeded in
| doing all the time he was there. The
| New York Stars correspondent says
the President paid the alfablc Colonel
| quite a compliment the other night by
asking him to the White House on the
occasion of the diplomatic dinner,
where he introduced the diplomatic
corps in place of Secretary Bayard,
whose personal bereavement made it
impossible for him to attend. The
| Colonel got along beautifully with all
the high-sounding titles and jaw break
ing names Of the foreigners until one
| young gentleman entered the East room
and advanced toward the President to
be presented. The young man men.
toned his name, and not following it
Immediately by the name of the power
he represented, Colonel Wilson looked
at him inquiringly, when he at once
added it, Colonel Wilson was little
astonished at the hearty laugh with
which the President received his an
nounccment, Colonel Cassidy, Duke
of Albany" delivered in his loudest
tones. Colonel Cassidy has been, with
his mother, the guest of President
Cleveland for some days, and has en-
joyed avast amount Of social attention
a@@
The same correspondent adds Sec
rectary Whitney, who is never tired
adding TO the wonderful collection of
artistic belongings with which his resi-.
dcncc here is so beautiiled, has bought
no less than 50, 900 worth of bric-a- brac
from one dealer in this city He is
ready at all times to purchase costly
his fancy, and is generally regarded rs
being easy in regard to terms. The
same dealer who enjoyed such splen-
did run OF business from the Secretary
used to notice in his store very often
knowledge of the value of his finest
| SOOuS, DuJ uouuliy tOullHCu llci Dul-
chases to small but costly bits of brio
handsome piece of furniture and asked
its price. She was told ii was already
bought by Secretary Whitney, and cX.
ness of the article, but added that Sec
retary Whitney was rich man and
could afford il. The lady turned out
to be Mrs. Payne, wife Of Senator Payne
of Ohio, and Mrs. Whitney's mother,
and whatever her daughters and Sec
retary Whitney's wealth may be, hers
is undoubtedly many times over its
value.
Nv
Here he Is once more. The Paris
@Io) Mercury says: Private j. II.
Richard one of the eight surviving
soldiers that once formed the famous
Black Horse Cavalry of the Confedcr.
ate Army, called to see us Tuesday.
He carries with him the scars of over
100 battles. His first engagement was
Bull Run, where he lost four brothers.
AT Shiloh his father was killed. He is
the only one left to tell the story of Il
once happy family, and he is viewing
the country as Il disciple OF F'aust
We gave this hero small sum to
help him on his way.
~
Two big, broad. .shouldored men,
says Austin of the 1TmoS-Star, each
one walking on crutches, hobbed into
the dob btailed' car at the Capitol the
other day as the House adjourned.
One was Congressman Brown of Ohio,
who lost his leg in the Union service;
the other was Congressman Stone of