davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1886-02-03
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

There is great deal of Balkan among
the war horses of the East.
A roadbed is for the convenience of
wheels when they are tired. .-Picayone.
A proverb says Hunger is the best
cook. That may be so, but hunger
hasn't anything TO cook. -.SJtings.
A New York tailor says every man
should have five overcoats. Not bad
idea-from the tailors stand point.
Chicago Ledger.
An exchange tells Chow to boil
onions" What we want is recipe foi
boiling the man who eats them. Bur,
hngton Free Press.
"Il drop your acquaintance, re-
marked the big man as he held one rob.
Der by the throat while he knocked
down the other e.--Merchant- Trao.
eler.
Oscar Wilde declares that he can see
angels where other men see only flesh
and blood. A slaughterhouse must look
like heaven to him, then. = LOsoeH
Citizen.
Prisoner (desirous of f1attering this
court)-'I think there is fine expires.
sion in your honor's face" Judge (ur
banelyl-'So there is, and the fine is
$40 and costs. ~ Boston Courier.
SHAKESPEARE SLIGHTLY ALTERED.
" He never spoke word;
Cut with look of deepest melancholy
He sat, like Patience on an ottoman,
Waiting for his wife to put her bonnet on"
Lynn Item.
A California man has defect in his
eyes which causes him to see every ob.
ject multiplied nineteen times He
would be treasure in thousand ways.
What man to take the Chicago census.
philadelphia Call.
81 have such an indulgent husband
said little Mrs. Doll. Eyes, so George
says, responded Mrs. Spiteful, quietlyi
sometimes he indulges too much,
doesn't he" They no longer speak to
each er.-Rambter.
EPITAPH ON AN HONEST MAN
Here mong the dead his body's laid,
But his soul is i'll heaven dweller;
For this man never failed, while ne lived, il
is said,
To return a borrowed umbrella.
-BOston Courier
A South Carolina woman rode twenty
five miles through drenching rain to
marry the man she loved. Seems as
though man would be rather shy about
marrying woman with so much energy
as that. -BurIingtOR Free Press.
Ethel Mamma, think Frank mean,
business" Mamma-"Why, what
way TO talk, child But tell me what
makes you think so2" Ethel-"He gave
me pair of sleeve buttons last night and
they were linked. ."-Keatucky State.
Journal
He asked, "Why is that look of pain
Upon thy lovely face;
Why on that brow hath agony
Set its corroding tracei
All! tell me- dear, why misery
Thy sinless soul doth blightF
ooh, darling" she replied " because
My new boots are SO tight. D."
Boston Gazette
A boy who bought a quart of New
Orleans molasses at Cincinnati grocery
store the other day found diamond
ring worth 5000 in the stuff. Grocery
clerks should have their rings made to
fit tighter-somebody will get choked
on a cluster ring yet. -AiLOaukes Senti
mel,
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1886-02-03
The territory OF Alaska is 50 far ava

The territory of Alaska is so far away
and in the popular Imagination is so
closely associated with polar bears and
everlasting SHOWS that, though it is
part and parcel Of the United States of
America, but little is known of it by
Americans. There are reasons now for
the belief that at no distant day Alaska
will be more familiar to the people under
whose protection it was placed by the
purchase of 1867, and it would not be
surprising if, in the development of its
undoubted mineral and timber resources,
It should become ere long an important
ana influential State. The territory is
of vast extent, having more than 4, 900
miles of seacoast, and 50 varied is its
climate that, while portions of it are
a most uninhabitable, other sections are
py reason of the warm currents from the
Pacific ocean, made as salubrious as the
middle Southern States.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1886-02-03
Chinese Secret SipnaIs.

The Chirese wood sawyers have sort
of sign language of their own, in which
the signs are made with sticks of cord
wood. When Chinaman has taken a
contract to saw pile of wood he places
several sticks on the top of the pile in a
peculiar position, which informs all other
Cinnamon that the contract has been
let, and thus the owner of the wood is
kept free from the annoyance of having
dozen Cinnamon a day ringing his bell
and asking for a job Should the wood
pile belong to a man who is not good
pay, several sticks of the wood are
arranged by some Chinaman who has
been victimized by the party, in such a
manner that no other Chinaman will ask
for the job of saving it. ANY one who
has had a pile of wood lying in front of
his premises for several days without
some ChinamAn applying for the job of
saving it may know that he is down in
the black list, and win just pitch in and
saw his wood himself. PORTE Ore
goaian.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1886-02-03

Late English papers contain an order
from the privy council which requires
every local authority in England, Wales
and Scotland TO slaughter within
two days of the existence of the
disease becoming known to them
all swine affected with swine fever, and
all swine which have been in contact
with such affected swine, the compensa-
tion in the former case being fixed at
one-half the value of the animal and in
the latter case at the full value.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1886-02-03

Ohio river fiat boatmen in old times
used to have a saying, and believed in it
too, that "water is clean after it has
flowed over nine stones, no matter what
it was before" 'It would be comforting
to fastidious New Workers, " says a metro
politan paper, ''if they had some such
conviction as an offset to the hideous
information made public by Inspector
Lewis, of the health department, to the
effect that "the territory from which the
Croton water supplies is obtained en-
braces cesspools, barnyards, 9,455 cows,
1,244 horses, 1900 pigs, and 20 sheep,
and population of 90, 600 persons with
their dwellings" The first thing we
know some Philadelphia newspaper will
be finding out about this and saying:
why Hello! Croton water is as
filthy as our own Schuylkillp This
matter of pollution of the water supplies
of our large cities is most momentous
one already, and must become more and
more serious as our population increases.
1t is simply amazing, in view of the facts
existing, that people are not more gener-
ally careful to have thoroughly filtered
the water they require for household
usen
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1886-02-03

Pagan Myo, on the bank of the Ira
waddy, just above Aiinla, and now in
possession of the British troops. is the
ancient capital of Burmah and in ruins.
1t extends for two miles along the river
and is choked with jungle. Its pagodas
are almost countless, and one of them
ranks next to the famous Tai Manal.
The neighboring hills are dotted with
ruined pagodas razed by the hill tribes
(who are not Buddhists) for the sake of
the gold and silver images of Cautama
buried beneath each when it was
founded
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1886-02-03

The most dangerous counterfeit Of
United States coin is $5 gold piece
that is supposed to have been made
through the rascality of some employees
in the New Orleans mint. It was made
with the genuine stamp. The outside
is of 900 fine gold and the inside of
spelta and platina. There are hundreds
of thousands OF them in circulation.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1886-02-03

M. de Lesseps, the great constructor
of canals, has been making some state
ments that agriculturists might think of
with profit. He says that one pound of
flour is worth three pounds of beef. He
asks why cereals are fed to cattle, hogs
aud sheep. ''Why not" he says, seat
the grain instead of feeding it to ami
mals" lie says that England is sup
porting 1000, 900 cattle, sheep and
hogs upon cereals she herself raises, while
she imports flour from America to feed
her people.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1886-02-03

During the past decade the savings
banks of the United States have de-
creased to the number of fifty, while
their total resources have increased
1927 600, 900, and the aggregate amount
of their deposits $3.50, 900, 900. The
average amount to each depositor has
fiuctuated from $352 to 1856. From
the best information obtainable the
number of savings banks at the present
time, by geographical divisions, is as
follows;
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1886-02-03

The New York Times declares that
''all the most successful farmers are now
specialists. One grows apples and pears,
and his name is we'll known in the mar
kets at home and abroad, for thousands
of barrels of choice fruit bearing his
name are scattered over two continents.
Another produces fine butter, and has a
steady and regular market for his pro-
duct. One grows potatoes and sells
several thousand dollars worth every
year. Others breed stock, horses, cattle,
sheep, and some poultry and hogs, but
all gain reputation in their own ways
and have a sure and wide outlet for their
products. 1t must now be so with the
majority of farmers, for they have been
cast adrift from their old landmark and
have fallen into a network of cross cur
rents which carry them wholly away
from their former courses. An instance
of this is the dairy, which is wholly at
the mercy of substituted artificial pro-
duct against which there is no possible
competition excepting by making the
choicest quality of butter and cheese.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1886-02-03

OF the total number of savings banks
about 500 are without capital, which ex-
plains in the table above the small
amount of total capital.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1886-02-03

Only twenty-five per cent. of the 5O
600 Indian children in this country are
receiving any education.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1886-02-03
RArEs on ApvERrlaIMo.

One Square, ons inch, one insertion. -......sa1 90
One Square, one inch, one month. ........... 90
One Square, one inch, three moutha ........ 90
One Square, one inch, one year............. 10 90
Two Squares, one year.............,,,.,....1B Is 90
Quarter Column, one year. - %
Half Column, one year. ear........,............Ho - 90
One Column, one year ear......................ios .ios %
Legal advertisements ten cents per line eash in
erti0n.
Marriage and death notices pratiH
All bills for yearly advortaseaents eel,~e>.1 .-.,.
terly. Temporary Advertisements nuSt - plle q
advance.
Job work-cash on delivery.
The Irish standard., 1886-11-27
Scotch Resist Eyictors.

Some time since speaker addressing
a meeting OF Scotch crofters declared
that if the eyicJing landlords persisted
in their attempts to exterminate the
people they would be met with stern
resistance. 'sScottish blood, - he said /,
:swould dye the heather if the emissa-
ries Of destruction continued their
atrocious work.
His word has been made good. Scot
tish blood has dyed the heather, and
though the attempt at resistance was
unsuccessful the men who made it have
no reason to be ashamed. The affair
referred to was witnessed at Kilmuir,
in the Isle of Skye, q few days ago. Il
large force OF police there were assisting
the sheriff and bailiffs to evicta num-
ber Of poor people when they were at
tackled and driven back by the hardy
islanders. But large body Of troops
were at once ordered to tie spot and
the people were finally repulsed and fell
back, leaving six of their comrades
wounded in the hands of the military
Such events as this are calculated to
excite renewed indignation among the
men Of Scotland against the landlord
system which has wrought such havoc
in their country. This victory may
cost the British dear before the end is
reached. The example set by the croft
ers of Kllmuir will, we have no doubt,
be followed by many others of their
countrymen similarly circumstanced.
and the evaporation felt now against
cruel and heartless landlords will be-
fore long be entertained towards the
Government which in its efforts to sup
port an sustain them sends its armed
forces to shed the blood Of the people
upon the soil from which they sprung.
Irish World.
The Irish standard., 1886-11-27
An Alrauao rs a Witness.

John Philpct Curran defended (.
poor devil who was charged with rot
blng a nobleman. On trial the victina
positively identified the thief. sayingy
though the robbery occurred at night.
the neon was bright enough to allo5g
him to see the face Of his assailanf:.
the driver and footmen both gave sine
liar testimony. Curran addressed the
court and the jury. He pleaded THAI
his client was not gullty--had been AZ
home fifteen miles away from the scene
Of the robbery at the time Of It's occur
renee He could not prove an alibi. fox
a wife could not testify for her has
band, and his child was not old enough
to know the import Of an oath; but he
could introduce The only witness the
prosecution had depended on for ideu--
tiication-the moon. ssThe dryer ar,ta
footman testified as they did because
their master did So" There Curfaza
called for the almanac. Several Of the
red-bound pamphlets were brought izs-
The judge took one. Turning to th@
date of the robbery. which occurred al,
IL o'clock it was discovered that ne
moon arose that night, and the prison.
er was acquitted. He talked to Currara
afterward, and the attorney said: Z ots
gave me EGO [$1O0 Of our money! to de-
fend you Well, i only get about e2o OF
that. 1t cost me e18 to get those all
manacs printed V'-C Columbia Jurist.
The Irish standard., 1886-11-27

means to the elevation of those who
have forfeited their place in society
through crime. They are persons Of
prominence and position in the coun-
try. The sentiments expressed by MIR.
Moy}an, the Inspector of Penitentiaries
for the Dominion of Canada, will meet
hearty endorsement from every Catho-
lie. The Congress is, almost without
any exception. nou-Catholic. We re-
gret that such is the case. In our
opinion, there should be large repre-
sentation Catholics at the annual
meetings of the National Prison Asso-
ciaJlon
The Irish standard., 1886-11-27

The census for Germany fork 1855
shows an increase in the population Of
All, ,125. !.s
The Sunday tatler and Jersey City express. (Jersey City, N.J.) 1883-1886, 1886-07-25
OHAPTER xCv.

A Supplement ca IAN act entitled "An act to pro-
vide for the organization of the New Jersey
Home for Disabled Soldiers" approved April
fourth one thousand eight hundred and sixty
six.
/. Be it enacted hgthe Senate and General AS
sembly of the State of New Jersey, That Rynier
H. Veghte, Edward H. Wright, AnM Dodd, Fred
Henry NJ. Nevius, e. A. Donnelly, Charles A.
Hickman, William Z. Potter, George f. Currie,
George Richards Ralph B. GOWdy and the de-
partment commander Of the grand army of the
republic for the state of New Jersey for the time
being. be and are hereby appointed a commission
among the lands now held by the commission ers
Of the sinking fund OF this state a site for the
erection and construction of suitable building OF
building$ thereon, or to purchase any land and
building or buildings thereon, suitable for home
for disabled soldiers and sailors, to be used and
occupied pursuant to the provisions of the act to
which this act is a supplement.
9. And be it enacted, That there shall be and is
hereby appropriated out of the money in the
treasury of this state, not otherwise appropriated
sixty thousand dollars or so much thereof as may
be necessary for the purpose aforesaid to be drawn
on the warrant of the comptroller of the state
upon the order in writing of said commission OF
their successors.
g. And be it enacted, That said commission
shall have power to make all necessary contracts
for the purchase of said lands and the erection on
purchase of suitable home, and shall, after the
completion thereof, turn the same over to the
board of managers of the New Jersey home fol-
disabled soldiers, to be conducted and controlled
by them as NOW provided by the act to which this
thereto.
4. And be it enacted, That this act shall take
effect Immediately
Approved March 26, 1886.
The Sunday tatler and Jersey City express. (Jersey City, N.J.) 1883-1886, 1886-07-25
CHAPTER CIV.

Supplement to an act entitled Gan act for the pun
ishment of crimes" approved March twenty
seventh, ammo domini one thousand eight hun.
dred and seventyfour.
l. Be 1t enacted by the Senate and General AS
sembly of the State of New Jersey, That if any
person or persons shall, by means of any boats,
scows, or vessels, or in any manner whatever cast
or cause to be cast, thrown dumped OF deposited
any mud, earth, soil, ashes gravel refuse rock OF
other solid material into the waters of the river
Delaware below the head of navigation, such per-
son or persons, for each and every such offense,
shall be deemed guilty of misdemeanor, and, on
conviction thereof shall be punished by fine not
exceeding three hundred dollars or by imprison-
ment not exceeding two years. or both at the
discretion of the court; provided. however that
nothng in this act shall be taken to interfere with
or prevent any person or persons dumping or de-
posting any such material within any bulkhead.
or by the side of any bulkhead to be forthwith
thrown into the same, or where the same shall be
so confined that no dirt or refuse therefrom can
escape into the waters of said river or with inn
provements made upon lands under water which
have been or may hereafter be granted or leased
by the riparian commissioners or granted by legg-
latiye act, but all such improvement shall be so
made that no portion of such filing in shall es-
cape upon the lands of any such adjoining grantee
or lessee; provided, the same shall not apply to
any person acting under and by virtue of any act
of congress of the United States or authority of
the secretary of war of the United States.
q And be it enacted, That for any violation of
this act done in the view of any constable or DO
lice officer, such constable officer is hereby au-
thorized and required, without warrant, to arrest
and carry such offender or offenders before jus
tice of the peace of the county where such arrest
is made or offense committed, and such justice is
hereby required to take from such officer a COM
plant IN writing, under oath OF affirmation, of
such offense, and upon receiving such complaint,
the said justice shall proceed as in criminal cases
g. And be 1t enacted, That if any constable OF
police officer shall neglect refuse to perform the
duties required of him by this act such constable
or police officer shall be deemed guilty of mis-
demeanor, and, upon conviction thereof shall be
punished by fine of fifty dollars
4. And be it enacted That this act shall take
effect Immediately.
Approved March 26, 1886
The Sunday tatler and Jersey City express. (Jersey City, N.J.) 1883-1886, 1886-07-25
CHAPTER Lxxxv1II.

A Further Supplement to an act entitled "An act
TO amend and consolidate the several acts relat-
ing to game and game fish," approved March
twenty one thousand eight hundred
and seventy
/. Be it enacted by the Senate and General
Assembly Of the State of New Jersey, That the
nineteenth section of the act to which this is a
supplement be amended SO as to read as follows:
Is. And be it enacted. That no person. persons or
corporation shall place in any fresh water stream
lake or pond, any lime or other deleterious sub
stance OF any drug Or medieated bait, with intent
or allow to flow or be discharged into any pond,
lake or stream stocked with or inhabited by trout,
bass, pickerel, pike, sun fish or perch, any drug
acid, gas tar or any deleterioEs substance what
ever which viii kill or destroysaid fish; any per-
son or persons or corporation violating the pro-
visions of this act shall be deemed guilty Of a
misdemeanor, and upon conviction thereof shall
be punished by imprisonment for period of not
more than two years or by 9 fine Of not more than
two thousand dollars, or by both such fine and
Imprisonment, at the discretion of the court before
which such conviction shall be had.
2. And be it enacted, That this act shall take
effect Immediately.
Approved March %, 1886.
The Sunday tatler and Jersey City express. (Jersey City, N.J.) 1883-1886, 1886-07-25
CHAPTER xc.

An Act to amend an act entitled "An act consti-
tuting courts for the trial Of small causes Re
vision], approved March twenty-seventh, one
thousand eight hundred and seventy four.
/. Be it enacted by the Senate and General
Assembly of the State Of New Jersey, That the
twenty-second section'of the act of which this is
amendatory be amended to read as follows:
T. And be it enacted, That all suits brought or
commenced hereafter before any justice of the
peace in this state which, under the present prac
tice, would be either actions Of debt, covenant
assumpst or trespass on the case for injuries aris
ing from breaches of contract, or the non-perform
ance of duties arising from contract, shall be in
the name and style of actions upon contracts, and
counts for the said causes of actions may be Joined
in the same suit, any law, usage or custom to the
contrary Notwithstanding.
q And be it enacted, That actions of trespass
for injuries to property real or personal, actions
of troyer and Of trespass on the case for injuries
to property real OF personal shall hereafter be in
the name and style of actions of tort, and counts
for said causes Of action may be joined in the
same suit.
g. And be It enacted, That this act shall take
Approved March Is, 1886.
The Sunday tatler and Jersey City express. (Jersey City, N.J.) 1883-1886, 1886-07-25
CHAPTER Lxxxrx.

A Supplement- to an act entitled Gan act to au-
th0riZe cities to construct sewers and drains
and provide for the payment thereof" approved
March eighth, one thousand eight hundred and
eighty-two.
l. Be it enacted by the Senate and General AS
sembly of the State of New Jersey, That where
any Improvements have been made or may here
after be made under the authority of the act to
which this is supplement, and temporary certif-
Gates bonds have been issued to provide for the
cost thereof as provided in said act it shall and
may be lawful to refund the principal of the said
temporary loans by issuing permanent bonds to
run for period OF ten years, of such denomina~
ton and bearing interest at q rate not exceeding
six per centum per annum, and payable at such
place as the common council or other governing
body of the city may determine; which bonds
than par, and the proceeds shall be used to take
up and pay off such temporary certificates or
bonds, and for no other purpose.
2. And be it enacted, That all the receipts from
assessments made against property benefited by
such Improvements shall be collected and as re-
ceived be paid over to the commissioners of the
sinking fund of the city if such commissioners
payment of the interest on such bonds as it ac-
crues, and their payment and redemption when
due.
8. And be it enacted, That if in case 1t shall be
found that such benefits will not furnish suffi-
Gent fund to meet the interest as it accrues and
redeem and pay said bonds when due it shall be
the duty of the common council or other govern
ordinance such sum as will, in addition to such
benefits, be sufficient for this purpose, placing
therein an equal sum each year.
L. And be it enacted, That this act shall take
effect Immediately
Passed March %, 1886.