The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1886-03-03
WIT AND WISDOM.


What would we do were 1t not for the crank2
How slowly the tired old world would move did
not the cranks keep it rushing along! Columbus
was crank on the subject OF American discovery
and circumnayigation, and at last he met the tate
Of most cranks, was thrown into prison ana dled
in poverty and disgrace. Greatly venerated now
Oh, yes, Telemachus, we usually esteem crank
after we Starve him TO DEATH Harvey was crank
on the subject of the circulation of blood: Calico
on the subject OF steam navigation; Morse was
telegraph crank. All the old abolitionlsts were
cTanks; the Pilgrim Fathers were crankS; John
Bunyan was a crank; and any man who doesn'
think as You do, my son, Is a crank.-Burdette.
very few doses of Athlophoros greatly re-
leyed me, and single bottle nearly drove the
rheumatism out of me. l have seldom felt it
since, and only slightly at the most. Rev. G. E.
Fisher, pastor of the Second Church of Amherst,
Mass.
A conversation between a married man and a
confirmed old bachelor:
do you know that 1t Is most lamentaDle
thing that you are not married?"
because you are leading such a lonely selfish
life. Suppose some one should be obliged to break
into your room some morning and ind you Dead
well it might hurt his feelings, but I'm sure it
woHld not injure mine in the least"
Colgan's Taffy Tolu sells like hot cakes A tab
tot it chewed after meals will relieve indiges
ton.
The ancient Roman bedsteads were of consider
able height, requiring tootstoo or set o. steps
sized sofas with headboard, sometimes CORE
spending one against the foot and high back at
the further side, but entirely open on The one on
which the occupant entered. The frame was
strung with girths, which supported thick mat
tress on which were supported polster ana Pill
tow
The action of Carter's Little Liver Pills is pleas.
ant mild and natural. They gently stimulate the
liver, and regulate the bowels, but do not purge.
They are sure to please.
They were visiting museum filled with dapi-
dated StatuaIy and other relics from ancient
Greece. sit is sad,' she said, very sad, to look
upon these remains of that glorious era Is it
not touching sight, Charles?'
Eyes" he responded. "These are the fragments
of broken art"
Smart Weed and Belladonna combined with
the other ingred tents used in the best porous
plasters make Carter's S. w. s. B. Backache Plas-
tiers the best In the market. Price % cents.
One loves to talk of ones self so much that one
never tires of tete-a-tete with lover for years.
That is the reason why deyotee likes to be with
her cOnfesSor 1t is for the pleasure OF talking OF
ones self-even though speaking evil.
'sQuncy troubled;me for twenty years. Since
started using DIR. Thomas's Electric OIL, have not
mad an attack. The Oil cures sore throat at once"
Mrs. Letta Conrad, Standish, Mich
Robby was awake when his mother returned
home from the theater at midnight Did you say
your prayers to nurse, Bobby" she asked, "before
you Went to bed?"
Mo- he said sleepily, ~ forgot it,"
''Well, you had better come and say them to
me now"
"What," said Bobby in drowsy astonishment,'
"does God stay up all night?"