The Cecil Whig., 1886-06-05
THE HABIT OF POLITENEss.

From the PhtladeIphid Ledger.
Few persons realize how great power
for happiness is welded by the simple
habit of politeness. 1t Is frequently re-
garded as superficial thing, consisting
of an adherence to rules and forms of
etiquette, or at best mere imitation of
kindness, which would lose all value if
seen through. Thus many worthy and
sincere people, associating it with pre-
tence, feel certain contempt for it, and
of course do not cultivate it, while
others, shrewdly seeing in it only use
full lever to gain personal ends, try to
practice it accordingly whenever they
suppose it may react benefcially upon
their own interests.
Both these classes err in undertaking
true politeness. 1t is not spurious i'm
ltation of kindliness, respect or regard,
neither is it synonymous with them; but
it is their natural outward expression, 1t
may be defined as the art of showing by
external signs the internal regard we
have for all our fellow-men. For, while
the many different sentiments we hold
towards those bound to US by different
ties are symbolized, each by different and
appropriate conduct, the universal senti-
ment of brotherhood between man and
man finds a fitting manifestation in po-
likeness. While our friends may claim
our love and loyalty, the aged our rever-
ence, great and good men our respect
and esteem, and the unfortunate our
sympathy, all may justly claim that gen.
eral regard that expresses itself in polite
behavior; therefore, although politeness
has many counterfeits, it is in itself true
| as such.
Selfshness often initiates it through
policy. People vaguely believing that 1T
pays to be polite take pains to act politely
where they see a fair chance of reward.
| To superiors in wealth or station, to GUS
toners or clients, to those who render
them favors, they will hasten TO show
little attentions and respectful interest;
but to interiors, to children, to the poor
or to strangers they will be curt, blunt
and even rude. Much of what passes for
polIteness in society is of this nature.
The forms which etiquette prescribes are
strictly obeyed, no rule is infringed, no
ceremony omitted, pleasant little acts of
thoughtful kindness are numerous, and
a general feeling of satisfaction pervades
the company.
Now, if we follow these people to their
homes, and there find them rude,
thoughtless and selfish, we may be sure
that what we had supposed to be polite
ness was nothing more than very mar.
row notion of self-interest. The truly
polite man is polite to his children in the
nursery, to his employees in the factory,
to the stranger in the street, to the crowd
who iostle him, to the poor whom he re-
lieves, to the vicious whom he rebukes,
as well to those whose society he Graves
and whose esteem is dear to him. All
are his brethren, and to all he willingly
accords this token of brotherhood.
To become really polite, therefore, we
must cultivate kind and friendly feeling
to all. The desire to please or to aid
every one, to the best of our ability, is
the first and most important thing. THen
may we study to advantage the most fit
ting and graceful expression of this
honest feeling. Both of these can be in.
culcated most easily and thoroughly in
childhood. Both can become habits of
life, which will prove invaluable. To de-
velop the heart and instruct the manners
correspondingly should be the aim of
every guardian of youGh. The exercise
of kindly feeling will always increase if,
begun as duty, will soon become dc.
light. Children quickly respond to tho
real sentiments of those with whom they
mingle. 1t is not difficult to excite their
emotions or to lead them to appropriate
expression. Too often they are trained
by precept and example to be carefully
polite to visitors, or to those whom, from
drees and appearance, they suppose to be
gentleman and ladies, while they are
suffered, unreproved, to be rude to poorly
dressed Or awkward people, to servants
or to each other. Thus the habits, both
of feeling and expression, become fixed
within them and they grow up to be es-
sentially impolite people, though they
may be versed III all the etiquette of So
ciety. On the other hand, the child wto
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