The Meridional. (Abbeville, La.) 1856-1906, 1886-10-09
Letter From Prairie Greig.

couis, though l was fixed and propped
ior'the occasion. just expected to
he shocked aud jos,ied about until a
tooth fell out, or some other catas.
,rophe happened. Virgins, up in
the high ground of Canada, must
have thought The broad. beautiful
prairies needed some Kind Of shak-
lug np, so the water would run of,
and it wouldn't be so muddy when
it rained. Iii never have any more
faith in t,,s Asst, meteorological As
tronomy. want him to come down
in Vermilinr and let the school
hoard examiae aim. and see what
he knows about Jupiter, Mars aud
Sat1Sn, getting into q conjunction
aud knocking the earth off lis axle
tree. 1t will sound him in bout two
minutes. aud tel! if he can ;ock
through hi telescope straight, Tor
tbs school coard has stood Ca the
P.;es and surveyed tue wh2ia heav-
ems and earth, and saw which way
its shadow fell. What q calamity
it woaId have been had the school
board fell off On the moon, ~ some
other planet-out Of he c.,ricuium OF
the solar system. Tho:gh, 90 mat.
ter. On what kind OF q mundane
sphere i: would have lodged, it
would have gone to work showing
'em how to read and spell right. Ri
bet an At.akapas pony on the school
boards "eating Virgins on Astro.
Me,orogica!'A strououy, and i any
body wants 70 bet on Virgins, just
let EN- stake the collateraIs.
1t was a-gsla day in Abbevil|e,
when the school board showed h.
teachers, how to learn children TO
read and spell right. I believe the
blacksmith enjoyed it more than all
the town put together. He looked
like a jolly. good fellow, and Teach
me to feel ano,her's Woo" 10 hide
the fault, I see shone out Of hiseyes.
for be had a CHEEKY word for every
down.bearted aspirant that came
along. They aA'had to 60 by his
door and saw the sparks that fly
and heard the bellows roar" / was
puzzled over the blacksmith bel.
lows more than any OF the questions
of the school board. | was always
used to leather bellows, but he had a
new patent iron concern, though
some how or other it managed to
raise o mighty wind. IT the school
board had asked me how the black.
smiths bellows raised such a wind, |
would have wanted about two.weeks
to study on it, before ] could have
told much about it.
The school board had Q time fix
ing up the teachers to :show tue chit.
.dren how to read and spell right.
Says the school board to q poor lei
low, look here, sir. Nov would you
learn a,child 10 spell, right'?" Well
says he, Il. l har.hardIy know 'cept
you give him q spelling book and
put him to work." Look here now,
says the schaol board, lets see il
you can spell Halifax according to
Hoyle. Qualification Halifax
says I've. That's no way to spell
Halifax. Gays the school board and
if you teach q child to spell that way,
.all the children in Vermilion will
grow up without knowing how to
spell right. Nav, just let me show
you how to spell right. Listen now,
will you Observation-Disclosures
Halifax. Now sir, that done &C
cording to Gunter, Hoyle and Web
ster's unabridged dictionary.
The school board tried the teach
ers on the oceans, took them up and
down the rivers, put them through
The ~intricacies Of complex fractions
sounded them on the difference be
tween tuedle.dee and tuedle-dum
and finally dismissed them sine die
with a register and profound admo
ni.iou--aud told them to 60 thei1
various ways aud teach every ont
to read and spell right-to KEEP
their registers according to double
entry book keeping, and stady ovel
their solemn admonihoos.
The school board surely did pleas
one follow, and when it found he wa
go we'll pleased they tried to please