The Grenada gazette., 1886-12-11
FUEL OF FUN.

IL a
there are numerous counts here wher
slection is over. Pittsburgh Chronicle.
Telegraph.
Water, is this an Old or new
herring that you brought me'' "tan !
you tell?' "No. " We'll, then. what
difference does ii make? e?'-Fheqeade
Batter.
-"Law Without Lawyers" is the
title of new book. That's nothing
new. Lemonade without lemons has
been an old thing ever since picnics
We're invented. Prairie Farmer.
LADY, can give you a little more
OF that clam chowder if you want it
Tramp Thank YOU. I've had all | want,
an besides you'll need what's left to
wash the d shes with.-Lus.
A Competent Cook. New Cook
"An' please. ma am. how shall coot
the clamsa" Mistress: Why. how
have you cooked them in other placese'
"Sure l allus made iyster soup vic
'em. " Y Mail.
Herr Strauss (va"ning>-How you
vas. Hanse You don't know nobody
no more. amt it, Hans-Mine frent,
if You vas shut your mouth so can see
your face, den mebbe can tell who you
vas
Mrs De Virgins made Mr..
Homan's house burn down. Jack9
Jack-Spontaneous combustion, l be-
lieve, Mrs. De Wiggins-ls that so? |
heard somebody say it took fire of itself.
but | did not bal;eve any such nom
sense. Boston Bulletin.
A writer saws that the sense OF
humor very rarely exists in children
under twelve years old. This writer
evidently has never seen fiye-year-old
child pryins open the eyes of four
days old kitten. -Norristorn Herald.
-"Oconomowoc, yelled the brake
man. "O'Connor may walk. may he"
exclaimed an lrishman at the other end
of the car. AN faith, if yez name me,
you Il have = foine time making O'Con-
nor walk when he's pad five dollars for
this bit o pastetoard. st, Pau Her.
aid.
A young doctor of twenty-six, bu,
who looked scarcely twenty was pres
ent at a Partisan party. What, Mon
sieur, so young and already a doetor,'
said the lady of the house. Yes,
madame. replied the young physician;
but l attend only very little children
a. yet:"-N. !. Ledger.
First dude Charlie. have YOU
:wo hawves faw one, don'tyou know:
Second dude Ctaking out his portemon.
naie) e)-Awv cawse Fwed First dude
Aw, I'm deuced glawl. don't you know
I'm the one. Charlie awnd I'll be be-
holden to you faw the loan awv them,
dom you know Washington Critic.
As the train stopped at small sta
ton the attention OF citizen was at
.racted by the yelpng of small dog
in the baggage-car. ''Is that dog mad?'
he asked. 'Mad;?" repeated the dis
tracted baggage-master, as he wiped
the moisture from his brow. mo, the
dog is not mad, but all the rest of Us
are
A little girl ate her dinner with SC
good an appetite that by the time des-
sert was placed on the table she could
eat no more. She sat silent and sor.
rowtul, and looked mournfully at the
daintes piled on her plate. why
don't YOU eat, my darling'' asked her
fond and anxious mother. "Oh. nam.
ma cried the disconsolate child, ''be-
cause only my eyes are hungry
During the siege of Vera Cruz BY
General SCOTS army. party OF sailor:
on shore managed to ''contiscate' .
number of horses and donkeys, and
amused themselves by riding about the
camp. As one "old salt rode BY the
headquarters on a donkey. several
'taa-otiicers, seeing that he was seated |
100 far back, called out to him to shift
his seat amidships. Gentlemen. an.
swered Jack. drawing rein. "this is the
first craft l ever commanded. and ii is
hard if / cant ride on the quarter.
ieck,"