The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1886-12-17
"INNocENTs ABROAD"
Anecdotes Of Mark Twain By His Room
Mate.

Anecdotes Of Mark Twain By His Room
Mate.
Mr.. Steve ellis, printer and journalist,
was the friend and room mate of Mark Twain
In the old days when the latter reporter
on The Call, of this city. They had likewise
suffered and triumphed together in the sage
brush, the dusty green foliage of which they
frequently succeeded in turning to bright
red. Mark was, and is, q very nervous man
Small annoyances robbed his life Of sweetness
and light Stephen had no nerves, and it
gave him malignant pleasure to experiment
upon those of Mr.. Clemens.
"Steve," cried Mark in an agonized voice,
shaking his bedfellOw out of an apparently
profound slumber, edo you hear that mouse
that Internal, gnawing mouse! It's driving
me wild"
ooh, hang the mouse" growled ellis, turn
ing over and snoring ostentatiously.
1t wasn't a mouse but a little machine
which Stephen was privately working with
string for the benevolent purpose of terroriZ-
ing his friend.
Mark lay and writhed, and cursed and
CRASHED his teeth. He cried so, and beat
upon the headboard. He got up and threw
things under the bed and walked around the
room and wrung his hands and moistened his
profanity with tears of impOtent rage. The
mouse still gnawed. and Twain put on his
clothes and went forth and paced the streets
till morning. leaving his torlnenter TO revel in
bed.
"Hello, Sam; what in Gods name have you
been doingg" asked Gillis another night,
startled out of req sleep this time, and sitting
I'D in bed. And 10 wonder he was startled.
Mark, undressed, had just entered the room.
In his hand he held japanese sword as sharp
as a razor, priced gift from Bayard Taylor.
This weapon was dripping with blood The
clock struck midnight.
"Blank him. he'll never crow again." ex-
ulted the assassin, but even
bed the offending rooster sent forth a cock-a-
doodIe-do that caused Mark to give howl of
fooled vengeance and bury his head under the
blankets. In the morning it was discovered
that his one furious stroke in the chicken
house had bereft eight hens of their heads,
but the rooster had escaped. He owed his
life to the fortunate circumstance that he
slept-or, rather, crowed--at the end of the
perch farthest from the door of the coop.
"Stevel Steve, l say! Curse you, wake
up" came III a hoarse and furious whisper at
a. m.
Mr. ellis awoke and beheld Mr.. Clemens,
clad only i'll his shirt, standing by the open
window The night was cold, and MIR. Glenn
ems was shivering violently In his shak-
ing hand was a revolver.
~Steve," he pleaded, you're warm and
vour nerve is good. For Gods sake, get up
and shoot this cat for me. I've been out IN
the yard for an hour, trying to get bead on
the brute, and that he's there on the
fence can't XIII him-oh, know that can
kill him, blank himi Get up, Steve, do
"Oh, let the cat alone.
.sVyhat, You won't get upl Then, by the
Creator that made me, Steve ellis, I'll shoot
YOU. I'm shaky, but l can do that if l can't
hit the catls
And Mr.. ellis arose and slew the cat III
self-defense, and Mark Twain went out and
brought in a bottle and sat up till sunrise
to celebrate the executon.-San Francisco
COST