Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-12-17
BRIGHT BITS.

ALARMED WIFE ITO husband who has just
coute n)-Wh' John, dear, you look i'll!
HuSband.I may (h'cl look i'll, dear, but
thic) feel frs Iate.-NeGo Y rk Times.
SHE-WeI. my dear, we ought to get the
children something nice for Christmas this
year.
He-Yes. suppose that's so, and yet money
isn't very plentiful.
She-Weli. must know how much am to
have for this purpose. What is the limit?
He fabsently)-Four dollars is as high as
generally play. It'd Bis.
"LAND sAKEw f. Henry Georges only
swear word. Prof; Proctor ALWAYS says my
and Gen. Hazen. like most of the signal SER
vice men, swears "Bv thunder!" "Saints
protect us!' is Mr.. RandalPs exclamation,
while the Chicago Anarchists all say Mercy
n us" Elk Minister Cox says "Oh, Pachan'
Many eminent mugwumps say only Good
ness me-" Henry Watterson. however, swears
nothing but plain ''dem. "-Burdette.
YOUNG SYPHER called on Miss De Smith the
other evening and he stayed and STAYED out
OF all reason, talking about Christmas festivi-
ties.
~ think you would have been a capital
hand at one part of the old English customs"
Miss De Smith finally sad. yawning widely.
mo; do you though, really?'' young Sypher
deightedly returned. What part, now
what part. pray?"
''Lugging in the bore's head" Miss De
Smith sleepingly exclaimed. -ROckIand Cour-
o, SHE'S going to marry Lord,
Yum yum!
Her heart she will bury,
lis debts are large, verv;
And down with the dust he must come,
Come, come!
But still she ia brmm ng with glee,
For American girls round sum
Some, some
Will pay for blue blooded bum.
Bum. bum,
For love is not vital
Compared to title.
Aud happy l hope she well be.
Rambler
HE was masher. She was woman who
was spelling S14 hat in the rain. He raised
his umbrella, hurried along and overlook her.
and began:
"Mauan, permit me to offer the use"
ION! thank you ever so muchn she inter-
rupted, as she took it from his band, and
walked on, leaving him to skip for a door,
way.
A newsboy who had noted the performance
from his position under an awning, looked
from one to the other several times, and then
approached the masher. and queried:
under the INSTANCES you don't want
to buy newspaper, do you2p
And the answer was such a melancholy
shake of the head that the boy recommended
change of climate.-DetrOtt Free Press.
SIS Mr.. Brown inP" he asked as he strolled
into the bank.
Brown, the cashierP'' inquired the Presi-
dent.
"Yes.n
lie 10 not in."
''Can you tell me where he is?"
mo. Haven't the slightest idea."
Dear me, that's too bad"
$50 think"
~ want to see him very much"
$50 do We"
Haven't any idea as to where he might be
found?"
Vel, mil ht guess"
"Where"
SIN Canada"
Then the stranger walked sadly out and
thought very hard OF the $500 he had given
Brown to invest.
HE has taken it with him." he mused 81
now understand why the Canadians had thei l
thanksgiving last week. i shall have none
this year."-Chtc fgD Tribune.
WE sat within a railway car,
A man named Jones and l,
While fond glances sent afar
Unto damsel nigh;
And thus by optic telegraph
The trip was swiftly whIled,
Her glances mingled with our chan,
And once thought she smiled.
SPY Jove! said to Mr.. Jones,
My new conquest to air,
In most enthusiastic tones.
lyon maid is passing fair,
And ever since / sat me here
She waited glances pert.
She's pretty, and it would appear
She is inclined to filrt."
Said Mr.. j.. "Nay. think you soP'
Il know not well the YOUTH
"Well, If you say so, we will go,
And speak to her. in sooth."
So over to her side we Sped
M mind with sweet words rife:
And Jones, the villain. bandlv said:
"Aw-Mr. Smith-my wife A"
Chicago Tribune.