Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-07-15
From Granlteville.

f, Give me room according to the size of my
feet.
The "lems" was exhausted last Fourth
before the picnic broke up. Consequently
the parting osculations were very dry. They
resembled the crack, crack, of myriad tor.
pedos. or legion whips, more closely than
the usual delightful voluptuous reverberat.
ing of the delicious exploding vacuum.
Boys, didn't we have high old time in the
blacksmith shop? Thanks for the courtesy,
which highly enjoyed.
The Schneider Granite company have a
millinery branch; at least saw the senior
clerk II thinning hats the other day.
Mr.. Hines didn't drink until he Joined the
brass band, but now he" takes horn " very
often.
In the twilight's dusky cleaning me-
thought saw a luscious bunch of bananas
half hidden from view at Mrs. Drury's fas-
tidiously furnished refreshment stand. An.
ticipating rare treat for "my girl, APP
preached and asked that excellent lady to
serve me with few, poin ting to the sup
posed tropical fruit. But alss for my hopes
That bunch of bananas proved to be an
humid, saturated dishrag.
! 1t made the Quaker's palate feel very lone
some to pass Joe. kerchner's elegant saloon
and think of the cool foaming ale therein
dispensed, a draught of which would haye
brought tears of joy, e'en to the eyes of
Bacchus, and uper-excellent ambrosial
cognac. But Joe's genial smile welcomed
him as usual. and though he INDUCES no
more, yet he would discuss one sof those
sublime cigars with him.
John Fitzpatrick wishes me to inform the
public that though he highly appreciates the
compliment paid him by an unsought cleo
ton to the X. of L., and bears the best of
good will to that body, that he must, in just
ice to himself and to extricate him from the
false position in which it places him, state
that he has never authorized anyone to use
his name as a candidate.
The Misses Holoran, by their united eff
forts, have built a neat cottage in Sleepy
Hollow. Hurrah for girls! That is another
evidence of what they can accomplish by
energetic effort.
DIR. Sawyer led 4 very interesting prayer
meeting last Wednesday night. We have q
regularly instituted meeting Eere every
Wednesd ay, to which the public are invited.
Mrs. Mason is having the graves Of her
cherished dead, at Middlebrook, enclosed
with an elegant iron railing in black and
gold. IT'S well! Protect the graves of
Scotia's noble sons, who are denied the bless
ing of resting In their own romantic land.
Rather would I grave in historic Caledo-
MAS most lowly vale than :. tomb beneath
the magnificent pile of Mausolus.
F. A. Cain displays taste for decorative
show cases which is worth a better cause;
such as adjoining quiet cottage home.
Young ladies please take notice.
Nathan Vail will soon be a candidate for
matrimonial honors. Young ladies ditto.
Miss Ella Bresl1n, of your town, favored
Dopnell's Park with her presence, as did also
the Misses Karchner, Rant and Mrs. Block,
and Mr.. Fleetwood and others with game
of croquet.
Peter Wyatt is having some improvements
done in Happy Hollow.
Mr.. Hoyt is displaying a vast amount of
energy in the opening of the new quarry.
He has achieved phenomenal SUCCESS already.
The skating rink is in full blast here. Jack
Snaisdel is proprietor and Is fitting up in
mates for DR.. Goulding's hospital by means
of 90 pairs of Skates, good music and
smooth floor.
"Pop" Thomas took the silver cup at the
Syenite races. He distanced all competitors
60 yards in mile heat; time, SEQ.
Old Iron is in the lead again.
MARRIED-At the residence of the.bride's
parents, on the 18th inst, Mark Thurman to
Miss Sadie Crocker. both of Iron county.
Bob Devils, the cheerful, has been solourn-
ing with his friends at New Madrid during
the 4th. He returned on the 18th inst. He
would have brought the goose, but it hung
too high, and his duck has eluded his grasp!
So he is poultryles8
Mrs. Reno. the genial polishing fornman's
lady, is visiting friends.at syenite, land Char
lie meanwhile is trying to content himself in
our Bachelors Eden.
Jack Snaisdell gave hop at his skating
rink, Saturday, theI 18th. 1t excclled any
thing given about here.
The Graniteyille Glass Ball Club are max
ing some excellent scores. The Secretary,
Alex Brown, accorded the @. the pleasure
of tailying a match between some of their
members last Saturday, the score of which
was ne follows.