The Washington critic., 1886-11-17
"PAGAN BOB,S~ PROVERBS.
How He Entertained u Congregation
Last Sunday Night.

Last sunday Night.
Colonel Robert G.. Ingersol addressed an
audience OF about 1000 persons Sunday
evening at Chickerug Hall, New York.
Following are some Of the quaint and
amusing things he said
II Ifnobodv has too much everybody will
have enough.
There is something wrong In the system
when idleness is burdened with wealth and
industry with famine.
Get out of your minds that old nonsense G
about mans FREQ moral agency A man Is
no more responsible for his character than
for his height, or for his acts than his
dreams. Then you will have charity for the
whole human race.
There is only one good-human hap
piness.
TO do rghti is the bud, blossom and fruit
Of wisdom.
No perfectly civilized man could be happy
while there wee an unhappy being IN the
universe that he knew.
The poor inagiEe that the rich live in
Paradise. know that the most OF them
live in gilded he'll.
No man has the genius or the brains to
own five million dollars. The money owns
him. lie is the key to safe. Yet these
men go on accumulating. 1t Is sort Of
insanity. Imagine mana good intelli-
teri, six or eight million hats [cheersl, u
billion neckties laughter and cheers
Then imagine him getting up at ~ o'clock
In the morning and working hard all day
TO get another necktie. prolonged ap-
plause
Great wealth is the mother of crime.
The gulf is growing wide between
Lazarus and Dives, only the two have
changed places. Dives is in Abrahan's
bosom.
The rich have scorn and contempt for the
poor: the poor envy and hatred for the rich.
There must be some way for the loving
poor and the sympathetic rich to get ac-
quainted. If there is anything that should
bring mankind together It is "A common be-
lief, but in this Christian country there is
no welcome in the velvet for the rags. /
would think much of any religion that
would allow the rich and tue poor to clasp
hands, If only for one instant once a
week.
All men are not capable of getting a
living now. Some are not cunning
enough, not strong enough, not stlngy
enough.
Millions of machines have been invented
to save labor, but the laborer does not
own the machine. The machine owns the
laborer.
No man should be allowed to own any
land that he does not use but would not
take an inch Of land from any one without
paving for It.
II it were possible to bottle the air there
would he great American Air Bottling
Association before shutdown tomorrow, aud
millions would be allowed to die for want
Of breath II they were unable to pay the
monthly air bills.
would not only see homes made free
from attachment for debt, but free from
taxation also. Then we would have a
nation OF firesides and nation of patriots.
There is something about money that
| dries up the affections. | suppose that one
reason OF it is that the moment man gets
any money there are so many trying to ret
| II away from him that he thinks the whole
race are his enemies.
] don't blame the rich, mind you: they
are the natural products Of the system.
Blame the system.
The first great remedy Is in the ballot.
| The poor are in the majority. If the law
| oppresses them 1t is their fault. They have
| followed the fife and drum of some party.
| No man should 90 with a party unless it
| is going his way.
A civilized man will never want to sell a
| thing for more than 1t is worth, nor will he
want to buy anything for less than what 1t
| Is worth.
am not afraid of monopolies The
| people will stand oppression to a certain
| point, and then the end will come.