New-York tribune., 1886-02-28

, ,, 60 tobo cara NJ the children II they should
have any, As this puts husband and wire on an equaS
II ought TO make the advocates OF women gh's aPp''
but 1t won't
one claims to ha ve found out that tie puShe Oh
corn which the dstiller buys for 30 cents IS e'ehty
sold to the drinkers for $40 90 Times may po ''u
the gentle dister manages to make his httIe proul
every time.
THE MORMON AND THE CTINAMAN'
Mormon going southward;
A ChnamRn going west
They stopped beneath sign-DOaru
To sit them dOWn TO rest,
SNOW what n blanked mean country
This IS" the Mormon said; go
A too muchcc must gIO C0unllee
And ClIn Wong shook MS heau'
"Ob whel you gon' MOmon"
Look up and you VIII know:
The Chinee climbed the sigG-5oard
And read "1O Mexico ! e"
"And where you going heathen|
Look upee,' said Chin Wong;
They read the other sign-bOard, ~
"TGls road to reach Hong Kong -, .,
columbus Dispatch
PHILADELPHIA is palptating with the wild hope that
ono Of fan daughters may capture Browning the poet
Now that progressive eucc being denounced Oy the
clergy il to be feared that sinful people WHO
hear them will find out that there is such same ana
go and play it.
Mr.. Gladstone's enemies in London derive great
pleasure tro repeating these four lines OF dogsere:
Into power no comes the third time
VITA projects 81 dark aud 80 sinister,
That no longer call him the Pflme
But rather the Past-his Prime Mnlster'
IN, San Francisco Ala meanly says OF Mr.. Joseph
Pulzer that "n his capacity member OF Congress- ne
wears his pants out on the fence" Mr. Pulitzer is too
c,reful of tho propriotes to be guilty of wearing
pants" when trousers are SO cheap inc A"a Shoulu
be careful
philadelphia seems to be 4 paradise for bogus NOBLE
men No citizen Of that good town can resist them when
they 90 into minute particulars about lheI grand
fathers.
According to The Phladclphtq Ners, fashionable
women whose time hangs their hands are said TO DO
initiating their English sisters ana StAS tAcI Soc'"
information ioI hltny JUcle."
The Glqio,s OF Paris informs its readers that General
Crook at the OF 5000 men, one-Ith o. the enufe
army of the United statos has been pursuing TOT to
pa, two weeks ten Ap,cncs, who have been giving MN
a break neck run through tho immense Territory Oh
Orizona."
Congressman Curtin, who il described as mot feelins
very well which sometimes means feeling TOO well
broke into "A discussion OI lhe Tension b ytsJeiudy
to sct of plrahrasn OF Flaudsan'. question, "Mntt
are we here for N the Offices 2 Inc country l.
quite prepared TO "glNo II up boston hecoiu
SAYS an old newspaper man ID "Bystander" IN TIE
ptHlIelUhia NOry: The ideal daily Will Oc sixteen
pages, Harp,s Wcciy size. pasted aud cut AMI II VIII
sell al a price winch wll give good profit on the crcu1
t,on II VIII not duplicate news IN the editorial
news for il Will PRINT no dispatches as dispatches ana
Will not glory iu flaming headlines All the heWs local
included Will be written Ont IN readable form, ana Ill
tho same articles whatever comment may be necessary
Will he made The type Will be- large aud the paper
clear Peopo don't Zap how papers get the news
80 ney do get TO- Il doesn't anybody but news
paper men wur,h,ra dispatch is special or not ana
ucw.rtrcr, arc not printed for the reading Of news
paper men
YOUNG u en- who rar on the nute or clarinet in santa
4rA CaI are rut4lc,,y lined by the local author
tiles
Columbia SEQ here Mr.. Attorney General some
thin. must br dome. You must either FISH, cut '"l oi
.o ashore" Mr.. Garand-"ruArs al r2ht am n'hlh2'
got All my PAn-IIectrc lines out but the sudHeon7
seem to be mighty scarce
over the dessert: =, -,.-.., -,
81 near You are going to get married Mr.. skmpoIe
Aut,. ola. yLt-'
81 do so hope you viii hc happy
Gavin help %. don't chew know Hcr gov nor,
worth q mint don't chew know, and sac tio Only oue'
IOwu Topics.