The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1886-11-28
Bill Nye's Experiences at an Imitation Hos

tlery.
Chicago Tribune.
We are moving about over the country James
Whitcomb Riley and /. In the capacity of a
moral and spectacular show. l attend to the
Spectacular part of the business. That is more
in my line.
am writing this at an imitation hotel where
two roads fork. l will call it the Fifth-avenue
Hotel. because the hotel at railroad junction is
generally called the Fifth Avenue, or the Gem
City House, or the Palace Hotel. I stopped at
an inn some years ago called the Palace, and
can truly say that il it had ever been palace it
was very much run down when l visited it.
Just as a fond parent of white-eyed, two
legged freak Of nature loves to name his men,
tally diluted son Napoleon, and for the same
reason that prominent horse owner in Illinois
last year socked my name on tall buckskin-
colored colt that did not resemble me, intellect
ually or physically; colt that did not know
enough to go around O barbed-wire fence, but
sought to sift himself through it into an un-
timely grave, 80 this man has named his sway
backed wigwam the Fifthavenue Hotel
1t is different from the Fifth Avenue in many
ways In the first place there is not so much
travel and business in its neighborhood. AS I
said before, this is whore two railroads fork In
fact, that is the leading industry here. The
growth of the town is naturally slow, but it is a
healthy growth. There is nothing in the nature
Of dangerous or wildcat speculation in the ad-
vancement of this place; and while there has
been no noticeable or rapid advance in the prn-
cipal business there has been 40 falling off at all
and these roads are forking as much to-day as
they did before the war. while the same three
men who were present for the first glad moment
are still here to witness its operation
Sometimes train is derailed. as the papers
call it. and two or three people have to remain
over, as we did, all night 1t is at such time
that the Fifth Avenue Hotel is the scene of
great excitement. A large Goldfish, with broad
and sunny smile and his bosom full Of rock salt,
is tied in the creek TO freshen and ft himself for
the responsible position of floor manager of the
Goldfish ball.
A pale chambermaid wearing a black jersey
with large pores in it through which she is per-
coating, now goes joyously up the stairs to
make the little postofice lock-box rooms look ten
times worse than they ever did before. She war
bles a low refrain as she nimbly knocks loose
the venerable dust of centuries and sets it afloat
throughout the room. All is hustle about the
house.
Especially the chambermaid.
We were put in the guests chamber here. It
counterranes.
The last remark conveys to the reader the
presence of light, joyous feeling, which is
wholly assumed on my part.
The door OF our room is full of holes where
locks have been wrenched off in order to let the
coroner in Last night could imagine that
was in the act of meeting personally the famous
people who have trid to sleep here, and who
moaned through the night and died while wait
ing for the dawn.
have doubt In the world but there is quite
good-sized delegation from this hotel Of guests
who hesitated about committing suicide because
they feared to tread the red-hot sidewalks of
per tition, but who became desperate at last and