The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1886-06-24
SESTABLISHED IN
! MARCH, 1S47.
THE MERRY SIDE I


-"There is fountain filled with blood"
A new style of dude hats are made of wood
pulp They are more suitable to block heads.
"My yoke is easy, and my burden is light"
as the contribution basket said to the minister.
-
The U. s. Navy has gone to the disputed fish
ing grounds. They should keep it tied with a
shore line.
King Ludwig, of Bavaria has rendered his
people great service. He went off and drown
ed himself.
The Democratic papers are still abusing Clerk
Vallandigham because he wouldn't be a
scoundrel.
The births in Lawrence county exceeded the
deaths, last year, by 662. Good news for Repub-
licans.
One evidence of the insanity of King Lud-
wig, OF Bavaria, is that he loved to hear
"classic" music.
An Indiana boy wants to Join the Sons of
Veterans-because his daddy was Veterinary
Surgeon.
The blackberry crop will be good this year,
which, according to the rule, will bring full
Democratic vote.
The DIR. Leonard Combination has taken the
road, opening the season at Cedarville, Greene
county, last week.
Since Bavaria has chosen to have a fool for a
King, there is danger of the royal family
ever running out
An Ironton man fell and severely hurt him.
self while painting a saloon. See? It's dam
gerous to go about 'em, at all.
An Ironton paper heads some of its items
"Lower End" That reporter may expect to be
sat down upon, at any moment.
An old woman at London, Ohio, died because
she was too proud to beg. She certainly never
served on Church Committee.
At Delphos, Ohio, Henry Miller undertook to
drink all the whisky in the place, but died be-
fore he got it accomplished.
A Cincinnati Lieutenant of Police was caught
by rufians and robbed of his revolver. They
ought to furnish him with a squirt-gun.
Wesley Sidebottom, of Parkersburg, drowned
himself. He seemed to think that name be-
lOnSeu at I0e DOtUOm OF the river.
East st. Louis putting in thugs and thieves
for police, is good deal like placing dog in
butcher shop for protection.
-
A large party of relic-hunters are digging in
Clermont county. 1t is perhaps Democratic
Com mittee, searching for suitable candidate
s.+
The Constable who could look at some of the
CHI
indeed be a hard d-hearted creature.
An Illinois farmer advertised for 'men to
drop corn," and was answered by half dozen
travelling chiropodists.
Chicago Socialists claim that their 'mouths
are not yet shut" Of course not. That would
be too big an undertaking.
The Washington correspondents still jabber
about Mrs. Cleveland being "the first lady of
the land, just because she married an OK.
+.*
Col. Lamont should hasten to contradict the
story that Mrs. Cleveland in mistake used one
of Growers collars for a trunk-strap.
-.+
King Ludwig oughtn't to have drowned him
self-he ought to have run off to America, and
taught our people how to run the Government
A drummer at the Isham House few days
ago, was amusing himself by shooting sparrows
with target-gun. So even the drummer hath
his uses in the world.
"Oh, that's mockery 7" said a Jac kson dog
gery-keeper, on viewing the exercises of the
Army. But that's what the Devil
always thinks.
The doggery- keeper mournfully sits in front
Of his den, watches the cleanly, happy-looking
men marching by, and softly whistles, "What
shall the harvest be?''
At Logansport, Indiana, they have arrested
woman for stealing horses. This is another
argument in favor of female suffrage. They are
rapidly learning the ways of the men.
The Cleveland Administration are heaping
nonors upon Republicans-sending them
special communications-request their
A saloon near Kokomo, Indiana, was blown |
up by dynamite. When the fellow came down |
ne was delighted. He thought he had foand a |
new brand of liquor.
One of the first speeches of the young politi-
Pm not candidate, but if the NOM
nation is rendered me, will accept" That
Kind of man never "accepts.'
The man who was heard singing, in the night,
I'm bound fur the happy land o. Can'n,"
wasn't drunk. He had the nightmare, from
Eating bologna.
In Gallipolis they caught two Democrats and
hree Republicans among the unfaithful Coun-
lmen. This is a sad case of the failure of DEM
,cracy.
The time is drawing near where the glorious
Fourth must be celebrated in manner becom-
ng Nation of freeman-by a stag-dance on
wenty-foot platform.
-.
"Im willing to die for Jesus T' said Saliva
ion Soldier who was attacked by ruffian. He
ion't want you to die, friend, he wants you to
maui the other fellow, in the name ofthe Lord.
-
True, all mankind ought to wish each other
we'll, but when you a lot of young men and
women pulling your green apples, you can't
lelp but think the cholera morbus might be
loing its duty.
An old man and woman walked all the way
rom Missouri "to shake hands with the Presi-
lent" Had they put all that energy into q
,ornfeld, they would have been greater than
Cleveland.
An Ironton paper is authority for the state
nent that Mrs. Mather has COW that makes
her two pounds of gilt-edge butter every day"
The first where the butter is delivered |
1irect from the COW.
Myers has removed two of the editorial staff |
Of the Enquirer. Now let Mclean remove |
Myers and the work of Reform will take an
other step. Then let the people remove the |
Enquirer, which would be still better.
A manufacturer of oleomargarine argued be-
fore Congressional Committee that the pro-