New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-10-10
PUZZLES FOR THE POST OFFICE.
CONFUSION FROM DUPLICATE NAMES.

SOME FACTs AND FIGURES ABOUT THE Hills VI
AMERICAN TOWNS.
IL una only a nost-oIice clerk, but his lameLta-
,;,rs o,o, tho " cussedness as he termed it-oi
mankind would have made even the melancholy
J,coucs smile. Picking up a soiled and ink-blotted
envelope he read:
Adams
Ohio
Now" said he. "what Adams' This ieho" per
hans doesn't know that there in the State OF ONO
precseIy eleven towns named to commemorate t"o
one original and genuine Adam, who tnrove In Eden
Soma vears 400 These eleven towns in as many
different connties-why. no can say. But how
am to know what Adams is honored by the possession
n, \ Cruoer A. MI They must have been hard up
for names when they named towns in the Buckeye
State. And what patrols they are out there 10
vou know that there twenty-five towns caileu
Liberty IN Ohio It's a TACT
Bu, Missouri can 20 Ohio one better on Liberties
She tas twenty-siI towns where they shout Liberty
and feel tree"
This was said by another clerk Tie first speaker
returned
"They all love it in the West Indiana boasts OF
eighteen towns of Liberty Iowa nineteen hansas
sixteen. Pennsylvania seven, and other States IN
proportion"
sTalk about Names chmed IN a veteran, think OF
Lincoln He was born in Illinois, and they named
two towns after HIM, bu' Oh. how they ioved inc
martyr President in Iowa There are thirty eight
Iincolns in Iowa. They liked Douglas pretty well,
too as they named seventeen towns after him
Speaking OF Adamses IN ono, 10 you kho" NJ"
many Edtns there are " somebody asked
Four Edens tor ec, en- Adamsesl Are thore any
Ewes I" . A.
Not an Eve. There's an Evesboroush in New
Jersey. though ,y.t, No
Grant popular man In Iowa said NO l.
There are twenty -nine towns named Tor hun IN that
State.
And twenty in Kansas"
:" And Twelve in Michigan and ten IN Mssourl.'
As to that" said the veteran. all onI ueherais
were popular from Washington down. We have. all
told 237 town, named tor the Father OF his Country
Iowa has ftty oi these, Indiana has forty seven
Ohio forty-sI Missouri twenty six, Pennsy wanna
twenty three aud the rest of the States two or three
apiece There 200 towns OF Jackson. hity-two oil
Warren besoes a number OF Warrensburgs tniity
six SCOTS forty Shermans. thirtyone SheHdAns
seventy -seven HarrisOn@. and 80 on"
" How about CommOdotes ,
Perry heads the list with seventy-one towns 10 hs
credit. Decatur comes next with tWehty-oIe anu d
DecaGurville." go
How ahont the Presidents !"
Washin gton with his 211 hrst OF course. me
Adamses had oct tween them forty Jefferson l1Z.
Monroe eighty eight. Madison ninety Van Buren,
thirty-t two jackson 200. Taylor twenty four,
nine. Pierce nine. Buchanan twelve Lincoln loI.
johnson twenty-six Grant eighty f91r, Hayes
we'll there thirteen Cleyeands. all named before
we knew Grover l. don't know how many OF them
he will claim.
in ridiculous fashion," continued the clerk. I'm in
favor of leaving the matter to commission elected or
appointed for the Jrcss purpose OF selecting names
far towns A name once selected should be copyrighted
or made kind OF trade nark so that no other place
comld use it. Think OF 2J7 NashlngtOns Nonsense.
Then Deope eau choose sometimes the most oulandlsh
names IN the worlc names that mean ABSOLUTELY moth
inc Here was town in Georgia called for twenty
years Postum Trot Then it was changed to Pine Log
and finally Frank lattOn. seeing that the people there
didn't know enough select respectable name, lent
them his own, and Possum TrOt-Pne Log is now
Nationwide Then there is place known varonsy
by the names Shady Grove, Shake Rag ana Shirt Tau.
What do they mean ana what kind OF people would
give such name TO towns fancy for certain
names like Union and Centre at times to spread
over the country like epidemic and there Is great
scramble to stick them towns regardless OF the
eternal fitness OF things. There was time III New
York-it was III the daNs of De Witt Clinton. think
when it was considered tho height OF idlocy even to
mention other than classic name tor town. Think
OF the classic ~ towns OF the State!
Tn pleasantest sounding, most attractive names we
have in America those handed down TO MS by the
Indians What are more euDhonIOus thar Oostanaula,
Altamaha Chattanooga. Etowah Chappaqua, Chauiau-
qua and the ike And yet within the last few years
there has appeared disposition TO discard these Oea-
titnl relics and substitute such vugarlsms as Drt-town,
Hog-wallow. SwIne-snout, Boomerang etc. etc.
There's town in New Jersey called Pluc xemin. which,
SUPPOSE literally means Pluck'em-m OVERSEE. In
Michigan no doubt means that lover-scll everybody
else louisiana has n town OF 143 inhabitants called
MANY Many what Left Hand. in Colorado.
signifies take it. that it was founded by some left
handed gold dgger JOv. in Wayne County, New
FORK may cause strangers to feel happy. HeIitown,
in California can only one thing. The place is
no doubt appropriately named What l. Is. means
in Maryland am 1T loss to understand Perhaps
Too Bad or Terrible Boy. or, anyhow. something 40
a gful that it had be abbreviated. But it is tlresomc
to 90 TIL list The only thing to do to appoint
commission az have suggested. When you want
to give foreign correspondent cable address you
cannot select yourself. but must apply to the
manager of the cable office to avoid duplication.
Let towns be named in the same way First get your
site then apply to the commission Tor namo.
Don: you see I"