Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1886-01-14


the same backward? Revivcr.
Whats in u name3" About twen-
ty seven letters. if it's Russian name.
Why is violin without strings like
an editors pocket? 1t is (minus the
notes
Why is a tight shoe like fine sum
mer:? Because it makes the corn grow.
One man is really not much better
than another, and he may behave
much worse.
There are now over S00o,0o0 stoves
in use, and the average life of stove
is 6"e years.
A mlrror reflects without talking,
and that is why it is the reverse of
some people We know of.
An exchange tells Glow to boil on
ions.' What we want is a recipe for
boiling the man who eats them.
Paul says a woman's glory is her
hair, bat the hash house boarder will
tell you all depends on where it is.
When four women are walking
abreast on the pavement they will
break ranks for nothing except man
with paint pot.
One often hears a person complain of
"doll headache" and yet they
wouldn't enjoy real li5e|y headache
any better.
It is said that no ''man can carry
feather bed and look sracefnl.' We
believe few men carry feather beds for
that purpose.
"The most modest man," says wri~
ter, "wi!i generally embrace an oppor-
tunitv.' But if her father catches him
at it his modesty won't save him.
at what age were yon marrled?'
asked she, in1ui.ltive y. But the other
lalY was equal to the emergency, and
/ qnietly responded, "At the parsonage =
Laughter is as hoaithfnl to the body
as glalness is t, the mind; and there is
no more beautiful spectacle than
smiling face when he knows it is the
true index Of the soul within.
II is little singular how much VAL
liable time woman will take up i'll
studying the postmark ola letter to see
where it comes from, when she can
open the letter and find out at once.
There is jast one thing about it. The
lady who insists or carrying a good
share Of her dress in her hand has got
to keep her shoes tied up or let every
body know that she left home in q
hurry.
A woman will cling to man with
the snakes in his boots through the
most trying adversity; but, if you want
to see her lose relson and stampede in
hurry, show her a mouse unezpcct.
cdly.
A lawyer suepccting some one was
peepins through the keyhole of his Of
| fee door, invested with u syringe filled
with pcppersauce, aud on going home
found that his vile had been splitting
kindIing wood and that q chip had hit
! her in the eye.
Doctor (to c)lored patiently Well,
Uncle Abe, / hardly know what to say
to YOU. Your case is hopeless, and
YOU may as well know it now, so as to
prepare for it.
, Uncle Abe: Hole on dar, boss; can't
90 now, no how. Got 'ticklar job oh
whitewaslin to do befo' join de heb.
culy band. No use talkin.
An Irishman had been sick long
time and while in this state would oc-
casionally cease breathing and life be-
apparently extinct for some time, when
he would again come to. On one OF
these occasions, when he had just
awak kened from his sleep, Patrick asked
him:
"An, how II we know, Jimmy, when
YOU re deed-you're after wakin up
livery time?'
"Ah, thin, bring me a glass Of grog.
an s,v to me, Heres till ys, Jimmy"
an if | don't rise up and drink, then
bury me
Asa woman was walking, a man
looked at and followed her.
"Why," said she, do you follow
me?'
Because he replied, II have fallen
in love with YOU
why so? My sister, who is coming
after me, is much handsomer than l
am Go and make love to her.
The man turned back and saw