davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03
French FriVUlitic0'
Feminine logic: The ambition of

Feminine logic: The ambition of Il
young lady is to be taken for ''mnt-
anlc.' On the other hand married lady
even though she is still youngis cnctl:n
ted il some one By mistake addresses
her rs ''madanloiscl!c.' Cynics, draw
yonr own conclusions.
They wero speaking in l. newspaper
Office of the resurrection of Lazarus.
LIN our age you don see such miracles
as that observed some one. mo, l
Should; say not replied DR.. De. X. Med
ical science hss made too much pro-
grcss!
Anatolc and lis wife arc out in the
suburbs of Paris. Tired and hungry
they go into little restaurant where
the proprietor tells them that he has
only 3 single outlet. "Only one?"
cried Anatole, "why. what in the world
| will my wife eat?''
A doctor goes to visit patient who
is very sick. "Ah, doctor said the
wife of the patient when he arrived,
:'my poor husband has just diei. He
died Immediately after taking that last
dose which you ordered.' 30, replied
the other reflectively: "wcll, you see
madam, your husband was goner
anyhow; his constitution was under
minded, so that mJ prescription could
not have been the sole cause Of his
death.'
At the ball Monistrol has just con-
Quoted his partner back to her place,
But instead Of retiring after the usual
compliments he plants himself in front
of her with an air of considerable en-
barrassment. us there anything you
desire, monsieur?' asked the lady,
noticing his uneasiness. "No, MAIDEN.
oiselle-that is I mean-my crush hat
which has the honor of finding itself
actually-upon the same chair as
yourself"
In the country. Il don't see any Of
the pigeons sent you, Father Mich
olas?' "Ah, monsieur, was going tc
tell you. You see had to shut then
: up for fear they would fly away, ant
the poor birds became so tired o.
their confinement that took pity upor
them and had them made into q pot
pie. Near York Graphic.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03
The Pump.

There's the family pump. who makes
the business Of his or her life to roul
out every disagreeable circumstance
connected with every family and retail
them round the neighborh.od. People
speak of her or him as knowing every
thing" but this supreme knowledge i.
only gained by the greatest presever
ance and systematical pumping.
The pump is detested and feared; she
generally makes her attack upon the
youngest and softest member of fam
lily. going to work after this fashion
She meets little Mary, whose Brothe,
George has left the country Gas she
thinks) suddenly and suspiciously; AT
ter kissing the dear child, she takes bel
into a shop, expends penny on sweets
then they walk hand in hand. and the
pumping commences:
"And so kind Brother George ha.
gone away?'
Eyes,
"And dear little Mary is very sorry
isn't she? Yes, l know she is. Anc
how is mammal
"Quite well, thank YOU
"Ah! not quite we'll, of course; but
she was very glad for poor Geojge t.
60, eh?'
The pump glances sharply at The
child but the little face is unruffled. thu
sweets are good, and just the sus pic
ion of a smile plays around her lips.
ooh! YES: because it was for hit
good, you know"
"Oh! he left the brink rather sudden
ly, l think.
II don't know; did not see him.
The pump looks baffled and vexed-
was it for this she wasted her substance
i'll pear drops? But she continues
And so poor mamma cried very
much and dear papa was angry with
George?''
No, he wasn't there was nothing tc
be angry about
''No, dear? l thought you said that
when poor George came home unex,
pcctedi\y mamma cried and papa wa:
angry
The pump had met her match fol-
once; the child looks up and laughs.
II didn't say anything of the sort
and George told me to tel You if yor
asked any more questions that there
an iron pump in our garden and 70,
can exercise yourself there if you like ,
Everyone, [ am sure, has met thu
Jump, that nuisance who would cork
screw herself into Your every affair."
Hnsleys Magazine.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03
What Que EuElish Woman Did.


Lady Brabazop, recognizing the dan
gers to which young women are exposed
when engaged in business in London
away from friends and relatives, some
two years ago established Brabazon
House, in South Crescent, Tottcnham
Court road. for the special
accommodation of persons so
situated. The object was to
surround them with all the comforts
and retinements of actual home life,
and this not on the basis of charity,
but in the form of what may be desig-
mated philanthropic business concern,
bringing in fair return for the money
expended. For a while one house
amply suffaced for the purpose, but 50
marked has been the success of the
experiment that the establishment has
had to be enlarged by the addition Of
aoother house. and tho two houses com
binad arc now ready for the reoe 2tiou
Of inmates. Capable Of aocommoda'
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03
Cold Feet.

At dinner party last winter the cool
weather had done considerable duty in
supplying conversation, when a plump
happy-looking married lady made
remark about cold feet. Surely said
a lady opposite, ''you are not trou-
bled with cold feet?' Amidst an awful
pause she naively answered.: Eyes, in
deed, l am very much troubled; but,
then, thay are not my own Her hus-
band blushed scarlet.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03
Browns Little Joke.

"Why, Brown, how short your coat is, :"
said Jones one day to his friend Brown,
who wittily replied: eyes but it will be
long enough before get another" Some
men spend so much for medicines that
neither heal nor help them, that new clothes
is with them like angels visits-few and far
between. Internal levers, weakness of the
lungs. shortness of breath and lingering
coug ms, soon yield to the magic influence OF
that royal remedy, DR.. r. V. Pierce's ''Gol-
Den Medical Discovery"
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03
$500 Reward.

The former proprietor of DR.. Sage's Ca
tarrh Remedy, for years made standing,
public offer in oil American newspapers of
$500 reward for case of catarrh that he
could not cure. The present proprietors
have renewed this offer. All the druggists
sell this Remedy, together with the
"Douche," and ali other appliances advised
to be used in connection with it. No catarrh
patient is longer able to say II cannot be
cured" You get $500 in case of failure.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

NEURALGIA AND RHEUMATISM are depicted
in engravings as demons tearing 1T the
human form. but they could be more truth
fully described by showing a disordered
stomach of clogged blood vessels. VINE
GAR B1rTEKs affords certain relief and
internal system. It diapels all pain de-
mnnS instanteP.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

We did not know but tt.s our daughter
would die every minute from inflammatory
rheumatism. began giving Athlopho ros
to her III two days she was around and
did not suffer pain. Mrs. G. W. Brown
lib Sixth street, Milwaukee, Wis.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03
A WOMAN WITH A MISSION,

She detained with fervid vigor on the
misery OF the Digger, cut . most dra-
matte figure while lamenting his con-
And she said the bare Numidian and the
much-tanned Abyssinian aud the
Cannibal and Guinean OVERLOOKED
her with contrition.
And her deep signs weighed the breezes,
for those lands where bread Ior
cheese ~, for the Turks ard the Chi
nese, she was filled with deep emo
tion.
And her ardent love was greater. all the
more she strOvo to cater, to those
tribes beyond the equator or across a
distant ocean.
And like Rachel, that sweet Jewess, she
wept tears as thick as glue is, at the
action Of st. Louis, and Chicago's
degradatiOn;
And that these towns where such sin is
such race for golden guineas, might
be made as good as Lynn is, was her
prayer and duplication.
For the wild man of Alaska or Of barbar-
GUS Madagascar, she would say, if
you would as her, that her love was
While her husband, luckless victim, looked
as il the Fates had licked him, and
through back streets where they
kicked him, walked about with one
suspeuder.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

A. L. Larpentuer, commission merchant,
St. Paul, says: ''For the past two months
I have been using Mechanics st. Paul
Paul Chemical Oil, and from it have re-
ceived great relief. 1t stops pain at once,
and recommend it to all sufferers from
Rheumatism or Neuralgia. would not be
without it." BY druggists.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

Break-pin Plow Clevis and Horse Equal
izer combined. Saves Plow, Harness, Horses,
Time, Money. Agts. wanted. Ask your deal
er. Davis Hook and Clevis Co., Madison,
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

CHEAP CoMFoRr.-What comfort 1t Is to
know that, in case any Of your children
are attacked at night with Group, you have
the remedy at hand in Aliens Lung Bal
Group: perfectly pure and harmless. 25c.,
&c., and 81 90 q bottle at all druggists.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

"Why were you not at church last Sun.
day, Clara2" asked Amelia. Il couldn't e.:
didn't have anything TO wear. | shall e.
sack- religious thing!'
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

There are lots Of people who mix their re-
ligion with business, but forget to stir it up
we'll. The business invariably rises to the
top as result.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

The fish has quoted down little in the
river, and no logger crowd one another out
on the banks and brighten tho children.
Still good fishing however. -Esteline (Dak.,)
Bell
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

What is the difference between a cele.
brated beauty and q woman paying conri
to q man. One is a fair woman ard the
other is O woman affair.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

Al the keys 81 Windsor Caste woqs r..
Gently eeolou, Sat even this dec not Inter.
{ers With tie ispad sais Of d. 1ull's Cough
UYyUp.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

4 mathematical! calculation has shown
shat il the muscles of man were relative
~ strong as IL Eea he could throw & book
agent two miles.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

Az an antidote for malaria disorders,
Ayers Ague cure has no equal. 1t never
fa:1a
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

There is no changs in the style of fishing
expedition this year, except that the jug is
somewhat larger.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

At Harvard-''Nice old gentleman who
jnst bowed to You, Charley; is he rela-
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

Tho Lowell Courier has heard OF a young
lady in that city who is al Anuakisse;i.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

Cannot be washed Of. The color pro.
duesd BY 0uekinghau's Dye for - y his-
tors.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-06-03

ulSllkc, tempered only WIN some
dread of his mysterious power.
1t was week after his last visit.
that a ring at the Office bell, one
morning, announced Marie Won
Sulevitch. She had walked far, for
she breathed hard; but her face was
white, and showed that she was sus-
tanned by moral rather than physical
strength.
DR.: Hoyt sprang to get a chair; bu,
she leaned against the door,
"No," she said. Il will not sit
down. 1wish you to tell me where tc
go, because you said l could be nurse,
and it is no longer possible for me tc
stay at home"
The doctor walked the length of tho
room, and turned before he spoke.
Tell me all of it, no said. an
your friend.''
She sighed YEARLY.
There is nothing to tell. You would
not understand. 1t is Nicholas thi.
time. 1t is the same whether it is Al
exis or Ivan. They do not care who
but they will make me marry. They
say l am of the world. If will mo-
marry Nicholas, they will cast me of
to the worlds people. am no Longer
OF them. | come to ask you what 70,
of the world do with your women wbt
do not marry.
DIR. Hoyt looked out of the Cwindov
and there was a queer smile on hi:
face,
"Why not?" he whispered. ':She j!
beautiful and good. more capable
| every WAY than tho host of ,ho;, h.ol-
crammed girls; more nearly in the
image of her Maker, too. WHY not?'
! MARIE he said aloud, turning
toward her, fare you sure it is no
that you do not wish to marry Nicho
las and Alexis? ask you now to b,
my wife. VIII your resolution h,
=! Vivid color rushed over her face
and she put up her hands despairing iy
They said1 would be lost among
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1886-05-06
ELECTION or OFFICERS
or Charity Chapter No. 1, knights Rose
Croix, Scottish Rite MasOns.

or Charity Chapter No. 1, knights Rose
Croix, scottish Rite Masons.
Orient of II. R. D. N. st Wheeling, West
virginia, under the C. C. Of that zenith,
which answers unto 40 n. LIST. AT a
stated meeting of Charity Chapter No. l,
Knights Rose Croix, Ancient aad Accepted
Scottish Rite tor the Southern Jurisdiction
ofthe United States, held in toe Scottish
Rite Hall, in the city Of Wheeling, on the
Sth day Of the Hebrew month Tyar, A NJ
56I6, which corresponds to the Atm day Of
Nav. 1886, V. E, the following officers
were duly elected for the ensuing three
years:
BIO. Jacob Berger, 80. Wise Master.
Bro. John William Norris, 80, Ven.
Senior Warden.
Bro. William Henry Rose. go, Ven
Junior Warden.
Bro Joseph Hall, l8o, Orator.
Bro. Thomas Milligan DArrsh, 80, Al
uoner.
Bro. George Fleming Irvine, 32', SeoFe-
tsry.
urer.
BIO. John franklin M~srriman, lS', NJ
OF Ceremonies.
Bro. Jereriah Alexander Miller, 81,
s .uior Expert.
Bro. William Alexander Wilson, lG',
Junior Expert.
Bro. Andrew U~piegraf Wilson, 80,
Capt Of host.
Bro. Timothy Wilcox Bliss, 800, Gaar.
disu Of the Temple,
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1886-05-06
bELLAikE.

Henry Henderson buried an infant chiid
yesterday.
The B 1 Q. bridge on Union street il
being repaired.
The ladies lodge Of tbs K. Of l.. mestI
on Monday evenings.
The new Social Club met in its rooms
last Night and organized.
Thos. Crozier, engineer on the B L. {
c, was injured in the breast with d crow
bar.
A sneak tibet Weat through Mrs. Baker
house on Gravel Hill, and stole some
hsndksrchiets, etc.
Mrs. Dr.. A. K. Smith, of Cleveland, ia
in the city visiting her parents. She IS
~somewhst improved in heslIh.
Miss Emma Maxwell, of Eight Mile,
Oregon, well known in this city, has been
married to Charles Spencer, OF that State.
Mr.. Flynn, and q couple Of other gentle,
men Who represent the West Virginia
Natural Gas Company, we're in the city last
Lighs.
The Union Cornet Band oil htnsvllie,
will give q concert in the Elysisn rink on
day 18th. Miss Flsra Williams, If Mar.
tins Ferry, the well known singer, is down
on tue programme.
Stewart & Wards Touring mill is rushed
with orders. This 6rm has had all the
business it could do during the past year.
AulI's Touring mill has also been over.
crowded with orders.
The people of this city srs not slow
about ~pstronizing q cirrus when it shows
on the public square. The U. S. Circus
vas completely filled and there was NOT =
reserved seat to be had after 8 o'clock.
II. B. Evert, tbs Snowman who was ST.
rested for swiudling Wm. Kincsij, certain
ly got off easy. Had the compromise not
been accepted he woald certsinly have
been sentenced to o term in the psniten.
tiary. Mr.. Kincaii Was srill in TIE city
last evening. The old gentleman has no
doubt learned q valuable lesson.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1886-05-06
l.. s. ooDGUo sell Grygoods the cheapest
BHIDGEPOR +.

Yesterday WAS pay day on thu c., L. X
W. road.
R Y. Daft, OF St. Clairsville, was in the
city yesterday.
James Reec', Esq., Of St. ClairsViile' was
in town yesterday.
HlrrS Fawcet, Of St. CIairsville, was in
the city yesterday.
&c. Dent had his fancy trotting Wilkes
col in harness yesterday.
Mss X We Yoder, of FAirmont, w. Va ,
ia tn gue,t OF Mes j. c. Dent.
Reason Blrd4tte is again able to attend
to his bu5lne3s, after a short illOesa.
1 was reported last evening that John
Blk WAS lying at the point Of death.
Ne. James Grfin, of Q lincy, o, was the
CUES; Of M. George Glfiiu yesterday.
Daniel earns, E.q OF New Athens, is
the CUES. OF Hon. Ross j. Alexander.
Mss Minnie Morgan, OF Benwood, was
the guest Of friends in town yesterday.
Mr.. Wm. Gil ia at home from the So
diers' Home of Dayton, O., on a furloueb.
Miss Watfeld, of Quincy, Ill is the
guest of her grandmother, Mrs. ID. L. How
ell.
Miss Carrie Van Pelt, of Martins Ferrr,
WAS the guest of MrS. II. c. Wells yestet-
day.
A family reunion was held at ~ ,,no
of Squire Cooke in Me- Athens yester.
Gay.
Joseph Hsrvey has resigned his position
as porter at \. Brsuum & Son's wholesale
grocery.
Miss Burt, a daughter Of Enoch Burt,
died yesterday. The remains will be taken
to Cameron for burial.
Mrs. James had one Of her legs smpu.
tated by Doctors Todd, Wagner and Fris.
sell on Monday. The limb-has been dis
essed for several years, and amPatation
was q lsst resort.
Raw. David Trueman, father of j. f
Truemsn and II. E. Truemsn, Of this
place, died a: his home, FIVE miles west OF
town, on Monday, aud vas buried in the
Kusay cemetery yesterday.
Billy Patterson, the epterprisipg milk
man Of Pssco, has come out in o bran new
wagon built Tor him by Donaldson & Lew
is. The entire outfit, including the bell, il
very nobby. and is not surpassed for looks
o: convenience.
Mira. Smith came down from Martins
Ferry Yesterday in search of her fifteen
yeer old daughter, who had LETT home, and
who was supposed TO be with The Indian
show row exhibiting here. Officer Scott
and the mother started in search Of the
girl, and found her nesr the rink where
the show is holding forth. The girl OF first
said she would not go home, but on the
officer telling her she would have to 90
home or to Jail she chose the former alter.
native.
Sherman Bags, a highly respectable
young man, and q son of A. J. Bags.
died at his home in Kirkwood at 1870 p.
N. Tuesday. Mr.. Bags received a fall
from q tree q f,W years ago which so in.
jured his lnngs that they have been affect
ed ever since, aud at last caused his death.
He was employed as conductor on the st.
CIsirsville and Northern for several years,
and was considered a trusty enploye. Last
spring he took a Southern trip for his
health which. however. failed TO benefit
him. he will be buried IN Weeks GENE.
terry at halt past one to-day.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1886-05-06
h New Oil Company.

The Secretary Of SAFE has issued a Ger,
tifcste of Incorporation to the Wheeling
Oil Company, extended mention of the
formation of which made in these columns
q week or more ago. The purpose for
which the company is formed lie the pro-
producing Of carbon or petroleum oil, nat.
ural gas or other volatile substances and
for the transporting and selling the same
to others. The chief Office is to be kept at
Wheeling. The amount subscribed is 49,,
800 and the sun paid is s., 100. The
privilege of increasing the amount by 81
ditionsl sale of shares to $500, 900 is grant.
ed to the company. The capital subscribed
ia divided into shares Of 500 each and are
held BY C. P. Brown. 20 shares; E. L
Rose, "a shares; Hullihsn Quarter 6
shares; I. c. Mo6at, 5 shares; George
Wise, 10 shares; ]. F. PAUL, 5 shares;
James Craugle, 10 shares; W. B. Donald
son, 5 shares, all of Wheeling.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1886-05-06
BRILLIANT OPENING
Of the Maennsrchor Singing So
Cisiy's New Hall
Last EVening---An Immense Crowd Pres
emf, a Fine Programme Rendered
and a Gay Tine Spent
BY All.

Last evening the Msennerchor Singing
Society formally opened their new hall In
Crsngle's Block, on Market street, with
one Of the most brilliant concerts and So
cial entertainments ever given in the city.
At 8 o'clock the large hall was crammed
and iammed with an assemblage OF mem
beers, their ladies and friends, to the num-
Der of at least ons thousand. The pro-
graLnme opened with an overture BY the
Opera House orchestra, which vas render
ed in It's usual excellent mat
ner. Then followed an array OF musical
numbers that were all rendered in q d.
cidedly artistic manner. Miss Flora Viii
lisms, 90 usual, received an ovation on her
appearance, and was compelled 10 answer
an encore. She sang "Schlummer Lled
and "lf Unkindly | BEEN TO Meet Thee,
in her well known accomplished and
charming manner that has made her such
a fsvorite in Wheeling musical circles. .
Mr.. Carl Zulauf saug u bass solo GOOD
Night" in excellent style, and received
a Storm of applause. Prot, Louis Vsss'
violin solo, and Prot Il. J.. Arbenz's piano
solo, both received their share of applause,
which, was highly deserved. The choruses
rendered by the Msennerchor, OF Martin 8
Ferry; the Germsnia, Turner and Maen'
nerchor societies OF this city were all we'll
rendered, as were also the numbers given
by the orchestra.
At the conclusion OF the programme the
ball WAS cleared and the ball was declared
opened, aud the Opera House orchestra
striking up 40 enhancing valse, those OF
the merry throng who desired whirled of
in the may dance. The ball beng fairly
begun the fun wsxed warm and Terpsichore
held high carnival until 3 o'clock this
morning, when the assemblage ~disbsnded'
having enjoyed a delightful social season
Tbs piano which was rallied CT vas won
by ticket No. Y F, and the person holding
that ticket is requested 10 present it to the
President OF the Society, F. D. Fredericks
Mr.. Fred Arbenz received the diamond
pin for selling the largest number OF tick
els among the gentlemen, and Miss LILLY
Hilderbright received the gold watch az
the lady selling the lsrgest number. sne
having disposed Of 1872 and Mr.. Arben'
of &c.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1886-05-06
Thy Met Ciaudestinely.
!S6ecial 10 the Register.


ST.. CLAIR WILLIE. Mag 5--Un:ontoTn
seems to be furnishing mora than her
share OF sensations. Over 10 that neigh
borhood resides L.on.rl Aadersou. and a
member of lis fam ly was a preposSessing
niece only fourteen years Of age who fell in
with one Rose, a young man Of nineteen
summers. They loved, bit the stern uncle
looked not upon their hart lougings with
favorable eyes, and forbade Rose 10 come
uesr his house For II time there was the
usual amount Of weeping, but q sun burst
came to the loving hearts eni the stern
uncle thought it s;raUga, bat soon found
they were clandes'ipely meeting at q tryst.
ing place oa the farm. he laid for young
Rose and a conflict ensned. Young Rose
was fined ten dollars for the assault in Po-
lice Court in this place.