The Irish standard., 1886-05-22

save US, Jelot loC1A w cAt1e: W oAA, nJ
/ never do harm. if that don't beat Ban
agher out and out. Prudent, humph!
were you prudent when you gave your
new under-coat to the Blind Fiddler last
week, and came home to me shivering
like an old pensioner in an ague fit
were you?"
':Hush! hush!-you needn't speak SO
loud, Mrs. Motherly,' he replied, glanc-
at the parlor door; II acknowledge l
was wrong in that instance. .
stAnd were you prudent when you
gave the FIVE shilling piece to that vii
lain of on old soldier, Manus McGilla-
way, till he got drunk and stole six OF
my geese, that TIE like Of them weren't
to be seen in the parish. -
.'And how could I foresee--''
Eyes, sir, but you did, though; you
knew in your heart and soul he was
thief. AID especially when he got drunk,
that nothing was too hot or heavy for
him. You kuew that we'll, sir And
what's more. Mr.. Guirkie, you encour-
age the villain in his thievery, to my
own Knowledge
s'I encourage him?"
eyes, sir, yon. When Captain Peter
sham sent him that wet day last week
for his coat to Castle Gregory, with a
token to his sister, it was six bottles OF
brandy he asked for, instead Of the coat,
and you gave him a shilling out of your
own very fingers for playing the trick. "
81 declare!' exclaimed Uncle Jerry,
after q moments reflection; Il believe
must admit"
80: admit-you're very good at ad-
missions; but where's the use Of them?
Ar'n't you just as bad as ever, after all
your promises and admissions? God
help me, any way; my hearts broke
with you; so it is
HIndeed,'' replied Uncle Jerry, tap
ping his lips with the but Of his riding
whip, and looking as crest-fallen as a
boy caught stealing apples, F'it's moth
ing but the truth; I'm very troublesome
I suppose, to every body have dealing
with But you'll excuse me, Mrs.
Motberly; it's time Was gone, if mean
to go at all;' and he began to sidle off
towards the hall door.
"stop," cried Mrs. Motherly, as he
lifted the latch; ''yeu're not going out
that way, are you?''
"What way?''
why, look at your leggings.''
"My leggings!''
eyes, don't you see you've buttoned
them on the wrong legs!''
'"nhat is nonsense!--the wrong legs. y
Nonsense or not, it's the fact, never
theless; the tongues are both Oh the ~
side, and the buttons too
's1Nell I declare, % said Uncle jerry,
turning his little leg ronnd and round, as
if seeking for some pretext on which to
Justify the blunder; 81 DECLARE" he re-
peated, s'I declare upon my word and
honor, it's very strange, but surely I
must have been asleep when put them
on"
so, you needn't be trying to make
any EXCUSES about tits just Of a piece
with all the rest. said Mrs. Motherly;
handing him chair to sit on, while she
knelt down to adjust the difficulty,
'fthat's the first time you buttoned your
own leggings these five years" she con-
tinued, "and you buttoned them wrong.
Tt ought to be q lesson to you, Mr.
Guirkie; it ought to teach you that you
can do nothing right. -
"Wel,'' replied Mr.. Gu!rlzie, with
little more irritation in the tone of his
voice than usual, "I'n not SO particular
about the buttons, perhaps; as j ought
to be, but it's only q small matter after
your best OF it,"
Small matter, indeed! I would like
to know what part Of your dress you're
particular about, large or small. y
ssHush, Mrs. Motherly, hush, say,
or you'll wake the DOCTOR"
'tI'll not hush, sir; can't hush; I'm
responsible for, you, and [ must
speak,
s.And can It you speak without raising
the town?" said Mr.. Guirkie, slapping
his sealskin down on his knees, and
scratching his gray head i'll utter per-
plexity; ''can't you speak with some
sort of moderation. maam?"
''No, can't, for you won't let me
but no matter; you may go-yo1 may go,
sir.' she continued, raising from her
kneeling posture, and shaking both
hands at him, RS If she would shake
herself clean and clear Of him forever
more. ''You raay go-I'll not be ac-
countable for you any longer-1lot an
other hour, sir; and if you come back
dead to us, don't blame any one for it
but yourself
ttNfr Gnirkin lost not . moment in