Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-03-04
he HAD NERVE.
The Gall Displayed by Travelling Printer
In an Iowa Town.

| The Gal Displayed by a Travelling Printer
In an Iowa Town.
lhad been devil in the Bugler Office.
in town in Iowa, about four months.
when the editor was one day called
away. The man who was acting as
composition, pressman, job printer, col
lector, solicitor and so forth, seized
the opportunity to 60 off on a spree,
and 1 was thus left in sole charge
Just after dinner, as / was washing
the roller and cleaning up generally,
in walked the first old ''printer bum
/ had ever seen. The buds on his back
weren't worth silver quarter. his hair
was long and unkempt, his face COW
cred with dirt and bristles and his
breath scented the room. He was rag.
ged, dirty, homeless and penniless, and
had been let out of the county Jail,
eight miles away. that morning.
"Howdy, boy" he said as he came
in, and without second glance at me
he took seat at the desk and attacked
the remains of my lunch. When he
had eaten the last crumb he picked
his teeth with tie editorial pen. peeled
off his old coat and commanded:
"Boy, hunt me up a job stick"
obeyed, and as he took it he walked
over to the rack, slung in two or three
lines of display type and then stepped
to the small plea case and set up the
body of circular reading:
HE HAS ARRIVED!
THE WORLD RENOWNED PROF PETERS!
Ttntrtloquist. Mesmeris,, Phrcnologist,
Prof Peters has engaged Snydcr's Hall for
the evening of September -, 1868 tomorrow
evening", and will give the citizens OF GARNER
Cit an exhib ton of his wonderful powers in
ventrilOquism, mesmerism and phrenology.
Will initiate the notes of all b rds; will speak
to you in sixteen languages: will wager Sl0i
to s. that he can meSmerizc any person in
the audience: can read your character by
feeling Of your head; will forfeit $40 if he
fails in single case. Medals from all the
crowned heads of Europe Flatterng press
notices from the leading newspapers of the
world. Every body turn out. Admission only
p cents, children free.
He placed this matter on a galley.
pulled proof and corrected it, and
then cut lot of print paper to the
right size and said to me:
'.Get up the roller and roll for me- ;"
l complied, and he worked off two
hundred IF the circulars. He was not
only good compOsitor, but he wrestled
that old hand press around like a man
who had never done any thing else.
When we had finished he said:
''Take the tin pail and get mo a
quart of beer. Tell 'em to charge it
to the Office"
l was afraid of the man, and got
the beer and paid for it out of my own
money. He drank the whole quart
with only one breath.
''Now, then, take these circulars out
and distribute EN-" he said, as he put
away the pail. '.Be good boy and I'll
give you two tickets to this great en-
tertainment.'
That was inducement enough. and in
two hours. with the help of another
hoy, l had billed the town. When |
returned the ''bum'' had washed up.
combed his hair, and had on new
suit of clothes. He had gaze to a
clOthier's and bought them and had
them charged to the office. claiming
that he had been engaged as foreman.
Further than that. he had been and en-
Gagged the hall. | had been hack only
five minutes when the booty compositoI
came in. He had scarcely entered the
door when the "bum" rose up, waved
him back and tragically exclaimed:
go hence! This is no place for the
depraved! How dare you enter my
Office in your present condition."
The comp" backed down stairs
drunken than ever. and after the stran-
h,I r,,,n.f.ornI 20
editor would return he went to the hotel
and engaged the best room. had heard
that somebody held a mortgage on the
office, and it struck me that this must
be the mans agent. was young and
green, and had never seen a display of
tramp printers gall.
Next morning he took possession of
the office. When the now sobered
compositOr arrived the "bum' selected
copy for him and bossed him around,
and there was no rebellion. He wrote
and set UP several editorials himself,
and made up the outside pages of the
paper in 4 neat manner, and worked
off two jobs for which three dollars and
seventy-tive cents cash was paid. Dur
ing the day two subscribers paid in four
dollars. and all the money went into
the strangers pocket.
The editor was to be gone two days,
and the man took such complete pos
session that we believed in his right,
and did not kick. During the day he
got hat and new pair of boots the
same way-he got the clothes, and he
drank three quarts of beer at our ex-
pense.
Prof. Peters circulars filled Snyder's
hall that evening to overlooking, and it
was the old bum who stood at the door
and took the money. When the last
person had passed in, the door-keeper
slid into the darkness. and the people
sat there for half an hour before they
realized that they had been duped.
Then grand man-hunt was organized.
But it was too late. The bum had
stolen a skiff and dropped down the
river, just about one hundred and fifty
dollars ahead of our TOWN. I. Sun.
The Nutritious Banana.