Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1886-03-25
SURRENDER.

CHAPTER v.
SURRENDER
My chest, which had been carried back to
my mothers house, had removed that very
night to the ferry boat which communicated
with the terminus of the railroad leading to
New York went on the boat in the morn
ing, before any other passengers came down,
and kept myself out OF sight. My leave
taking with my mother was a brief affair.
We had eaten silent, comfortless breakfast.
At its conclusion, taking my hat / said,
well, mother, I'm Off for good nown
Perhaps it was a presentiment that my
words We're true that made the change in her
manner. With softness unusual to her she
said: But, my son, what are you going to
dos Where are you goingr'
Never mind now,n Isaid. ''rve talked
enough before of my plans. Now I'll keep
silent. I've an idea that talking things out
leads to bad luck. I'm going away, that's
all. So good-by"
She said nothing, took my hand and kissed
me- | never recollected having been kissed
by her before She may have done so when
was an infant. Favors of that sort are not
appreciated or remembered during that ten.
der period. This was not from lack Of feel
ing or affection. 1t came of that reserve and
repression of all external signs Of emotion
bred in the bone way back through know
not how many generations of Puritan and
Roundhead ancestry, until not only had OUT
ward sign of emotion been considered as
bordering on an improperly, but the very
ability to manifest it had been destroyed It
was turning of the softer side of human
nature inward and the harder outward, and
the fruitage was harshness and austerity; not
intentional, but the natural growth of UNI
natural lives.
left the house, wondering if 1t was In the
natural order of events that proofs Of affec-
ton, parental and otherwise, must come at
the last moment, like the best dish at dinner
being placed before one for a second and
then snatched away.
In few hours / was in New York. Taking
a room at hotel shut myself therein, and
opened the packet received from Blanche 1t
contained bills to the amount of $500 and the
following note:
II desire you to accept this money from me
as loan with interest at per cent, for
three years. This is business, you know. I'm
glad for your sake you did not go ON the Ann
Mary Ann. You will go now to California as
a gentleman should. Mind you take cabin
passage. Don't go in the steerage to save
dollars 1t doesn't save them at all There
was Providence in that pig, and Pell, too
pigs both-to take you out Of the ship. Shut
up on board of her for five or six months.
eating their coarse food and leading their
coarse life, would have put you back as many
years. When you got to California you
would probably have done as five-sixths of
them will do-strike for the hardest and
toarsest way of making fortune, by digging
md grubbing-the very way not to make it.
If there is gold there, mind you, it's not for
those who dig for it, unless they dig with
their brains, and you can't dig with your
brains and work like hod carrier and live
on nod carriers fare. So, my dear boy, live
like gentleman and you will have gentle
mans luck. BLANCHE
So this was the promise / had made-to
accept a pecuniary favor of woman. The
unwritten code of the time held this as
hardly the correct thing, unless you married
the woman, when everything she had be-
came yours, and the favor, if such, ceased
almost to be one.
Blanche had few years previous been
left few thousand dollars by an eccentric
uncle, who, possibly recognizing something
of her independent spirit, said, when closely
questioned by some over-anxious relatives
as to his reason for SO doing, that he be-
ieved Blanche was a girl who could use her
own money for herself, and he wanted to
give her a chance. He didn't think, he
added, it was the fair thing that girls
capital should be salted down until some
lazy loafer of a husband came along to use
it, and generally lose it. He didn't care
what she did with her money, so that she
used it for her own pleasure in any and
every possible way except that of handing
it over to husband. II give it to you,"
he remarked, mot to the man who, not
content with robbing you of your name
wants your money along with it, Lend
it, spend it, scatter it, do anything with it.
except bring it, like good little girl, to
the chuckle-head who wants to marry YOU
for it
Uncle John Seton was a nondescript in
opinion, and seemed to take pleasure in hold.
ing none that were popular. He had been
privateersman-some said also SLAYER, and
others pirate-carried bullet in one leg,
the mark of which he was fond of showing
without much regard to time, place or fitness
l resolved to use the money. She had been
diplomatic in not offering it as a gift, and in
putting the transaction on business footing.
To refuse it under the present circumstances
would result, | felt in putting great barrier
between myself and Blanche. 1t seemed as il
she said to me: II am in this giving you tho
opportunity you need. You are no man IL
you quarrel with the instrument put in your
hands because it does not come exactly in tho
manner you would have itn
l could see in imagination, as clearly as
though she stood before me, the way in which
Blanche would have taken back from me her
gift. / saw her calmly listening to my state
ment and as calmly receiving from me the
notes, and then continuing conversation ON
general topics as if the whole affair had not
a feathers weight in her mind But under
all that seeming Indifference I knew there
would lie indignation, disappointment and
worse--the deliberate laying aside Of a feel
ing for me, something which l hoped to be
more than interest-more than mere regard.
have aid farther back that Blanche Sef-
ton loved me. But l felt that her love, il
once gainel, could not be laid ON the shelf, to
be taken on and off ut pleasure with the GER
tainty of always finding it there. No 1t
was love only to be held by constant
effort
bought, the next day, my cabin ticket for
San Francisco via the Isthnus.