Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1886-08-20
HOW A COyNIRYMAE DOWNED 4 CNLONEL.
EDITORIAL EAvEspRorPMc.

pore, ana we lelt somewhat llhe %
British dragon in the campaign
againstthe Mahdi Irickling from
a large rock that marked q short
and sharp curve IN the road was 10
be seen the coveted water which
bethOught us of Moses and therod ;
and what we heard while shaking
our thirst recalled the lesson and
the consequences of the great lead
er's disobedicnce. just around the
curve, and within easy carshot wo
heard a loud voice cxclaim
wIello John, how are you ?
What are You doing there "
~ am shaking this tree, Colonel.
Jim and l have been shaking IL
since morning
"Why, John, there are no apples
on that tree
81 know that, Colonel. None of
these trees bore any fruit this year,
and this put us to thinking Of try
ing the shake"
Dwell, John, | confess I can't
understand that, but that is none
of my business. ! want to see you
and Jim together. Where is Jim +"
"Jim started to Woodstock about
an hour ago to get apMr OF demo
cratlcal eyeglasses. lie will be
back tonight. You had better stay
over night with us and come ont
here tomorrow to see what we
find"
81 declare, John, you are hard TO
understand. Are you joking with
me, old fellow 2
ono, Colonel. it is too serious
with us now to joke. Neither of us
has cracked a smile for a long
Tune"
dwell, John, then tell me what
You really mean by shaking that
barren tree and sending for the eye
glasses
"Well, you see Colonel, wheat is
only seventy-fve cents bushel for
the very best. Much Oft is dam
aged and that is worth but fifty
cents"
"But you had a big crop, john
eyes, but at such prices we lose
our labor and our seed. And / was
going on to say, in the midst Of onr
dependency last night Jim broke
the silence with ahurrah Thought
he had turned crazy, and gently
asked:
"Jim, what's the natter SAID
he
"Brother, don't YOU recollcct
them halfdollarsW
Said |, "what haltdollars o.
Said he, "why them haltdollars
the democratical party told as
would grow on trees if We voted
the white mans ticket"
SAID I, "Jim 1 do
"Then," said jim, "let lis gather
ours in tomorrow"
$50 you see, Colonel, we are now
on the last tree in the orchard and
we haven't found a halfdollar yet.
SO jim said he knew them demo
cratical lawyers in Woodstock
would not tell him lie, aud me
bounced his horse for the eye
glasses. lie thought as we were
both old our eye-slght might be at
fault. The glasses, Colonel, are
our last hope"
"But, John, you know that 'uec
and halfdollar' vas only a figure OF
speech. We have two hundred
and thirty millions Of dollars lying
idle in the treasury, and when this
is put ont among the people money
will be as plenty as if 1T grow on
trees That is what veal meant
eyes, Colonel, but that amt
what you all said"
"Well, you will see it come out
all right very soon."
"But, Colonel, l have subscribed
for the SHENANDOAH HERALD, and
il tells us that Congress passed the
billto put out one hundred millions
of that money, and the man we
voted for to be our President, did
not sign it before Congress adj
iourned. and that the money will
stay where it is
"John, you surprise me. That is
a Black Republican paper
eyes, Colonel, but black truth
IS better for fellows like me and Jim
than a white fb. We always no
tice that the HERALD, when i'll
uses figures, does not use figures of
speech, bat the plain old time Pixies
arithmetic. And more than that,
Colonel, all our neighbors who have
been taking the democratlcal pa
pers, say that Cleveland did do just
what the HERALD says. Ifitisnot
so, Colonel, would like to know it,"
"But, John, you see the Repnb-
lican Senate passed a bill to give
seventy-seven millions Of that mon
ey to the public schools, and We
couldn't put it out in two ways"
ayes, Colonel, but the HERALD |
says there would be onet edand |
thirty millions left aftei aging out
the hundred millions Or bonds
And it says, too, that the democrat |
zeal House Of Representatives has |
for the second time refused even to |
consider the Blair bill. IL does |
look mighty strange to us people !
in the country, Colonel, that forty /