The weekly Union times. [volume] (Union C.H., South Carolina) 1871-1894, 1886-03-05
Another Blast from unels 81.

paper, but John fotched II in late Saterday eve-
MIN, and the fdst and last thinssthat read was
my artickle. 1 red it out lowd tothe ole woman,
and she enjoyed it nifty, an sails, isl, if You
had gone tor collcdge you would made a smart
man, but think you will do rs much or more
good than them fellers what rites wild 80 much
larnin' : an John he brags on it nifty an sais
no man CAN condemn them sentiments, an he
never hearn of any good man in town but what
brags on it an John said that eff man did
not like it, then it would prove that he was not
| in fur the rite. OF course, l knowd that some
fellsrs what loves grog and hates the Lords sar-
wants would not like sich readin' but don't
mind that. l wants always now, and in that
| next world ter be on the rite side, and thinks
that will come nearer ter it by bein' on the
side of the preachers and wimmins than on the
side of them little simlin- headed fellcrs what
| works fur whiskcy, and runs down the vim
minis and preachers. Laws-a-massy dom they
stink! Mistur Editur, here's my side, sink or
swim, live or die, survive or perish am gwine
ter stand out wild the wimmins and preachers
and wild tho Lord, and eff don't git lected here
TO Office will be lected in the crate day, and
| won't be on the side of them felers what cusses
preachers and abuses wimmns fur workin' agin
whiskcy. My wife is woman, and one of the
| best, and SO was my dear ole Christian mother
and upon my word i would not want ter own
| EN- If they were not and had not been agin whis-
| key and oil kinds Of meanncss. An preacher
| what would not work and fte agin whiskey amt
| no preacher of riteousnsss, but he is friend of
the old sarpent. So, 'gentlemens of the bar
don't cuss the preachers they has took an
9th of allegence to the Lord to do his work, an
/ has tI,nn,t 10 10 o., A. u.
ftin, an hoss racin' and oil other kinds.
does hate TO see one of these simlin- headed
| fellers stanin around an sayin preacher is
meddlin, and he has use fer him eff the
preacher dares to come down on whskey. 1t
shows how shaller he is. Meddliu, eh! Laws
a-massy why, l would not hav a man fur my
pastnr what was on the whiskcy aide, an what
would not speak agin it, would send peril
| ton to mex Conference to keep that feler away
| from our church, fur he would ruin it, and
don't believe that there is n church anywhar
what would have sich fcller in any denomi-
nation. Mistur Edtur, the day is comm when
| the man what sells whskey will not be re-
spected, an has hearn it throwed up already
| about the chilerns Of q certain rich man that
| their daddy maid their money n sellcn whskey,
and such people will put Lad mark what will
be disgrace on their chillern. An these fell
out in this an the mex world Good, plain
folks aint gwine ter keep their company An
| they tells me in n big city now, bar-keepers'
families don lote wild the upper ten, but they
| is kinder looked down upon. is nifty sorry
fur the poor fau lilies, Gaze they can't help their
| selves.
Mr.. Editur, did any one ever find ont who
struck Billy Patterson? believe it happened
some whar out in tho West among the wild in.
juns, and it was never lain to the charge of the
wimmins and preachers. that hearn tell on.
But in this enlightened country an town it is
foune out that people are spiteful agin i'm
minis and preachers as TO deslare that wimmins
an preachers has struck Union to its ruin
Mistur Editur, was you ever at little rural
hamlet by the river side, called Alston, on long
summer day, all alone wild yourself, and wild no
money an powerful hungry and did you won
der ef thar was anuther place jist like it be-
is Weldon, North Carliner, where was during
the late onpleasantness Well, l lest believe
as much as l do in preachin', that eff Alston
was q CRATE deal more lonesomer than it Is, an
eff it Was some iland, fur off from Ian, and there
was wall round il as big and MS high as was
| around that ole city whar that king was skcred
SO bad one night by the han what writ on the
walls, when he was drinkin' SO wild his big mems,
| that these very fellers what sais so many bad
| things of the good wimmns of Union would be
huntin up stuff an mems TO build rafrs and botes
to cross the water, and ladders to cline over the
walls, for they would not be cadisfed until they
giis Ia Aston, and they would not leave, either,
unless the wimmins would lef wild, them and
that big man what talked so much about the
| wimmins and preachers a-runin Union would
be in the lead a.hollerin' every step, come on,
boys; come on, we can git in Now, would |
not like to see him a-climin' the walls? know
all his finger nails would be warn off. Would
not like ter spe him gwine down and a polin'
q raft? And l believe If preacher was not
| allowed to como inter Union for few years that
the good people would fee from it as they did
from Sod,m and Gommorrow, and the smoke of
its lament would 60 up forever. No, no Mistur
Editur, preachers on wimmins don't ruin towns,
but helps nifty to huild them up, and knows
fur fac that no good people wants ter live whar
there is no preachers, and no skools and no nice
wimmns but have plenty of these in q town,
and people will move there, and live there and
build up town.
did not low ter write agip this week, but
| John went down ter court and sails he is gwne
back termorrer, SO l will sen this by him. /
| wants ter rite soon about church members what
goes inter bar-rooms an drinks, an upon nv
sole believe they is wus than bar-keepers and
regular out-and-out black-legs. l know some
nifty big ones what sets high up in the meetin'-
house and groans powerful during prayers, what
is regular tendants on bar-rooms. Now aint
they purity Christians? Why, they aint more
than halfcivilized heather, and l am sure no
body respects them half much as they do
men Of the world. These felers what cusses
preachers has no respect fur 'em. They is
disgrace to the churches. and the latin stock of
the community, an aint fit fur nutbin' except
ter wurk fur the old sarpent. They ought ter
be turned out, don't care how much they pay.
The preachers can live without sich money. L
knows they will never git ter heaven unless
they change nifty. An 1 wants ter write in
general on the ways an dpiR's Of the church,
and word on the coming pOlitishuns, an tell
how they fools the people. Laws a.massy,
knows en-, an am gwine ter do bottom and
fotch out all. | am gittin' 80 aint skered, an
l knows no fellers is gwine ter speak again my
letters, except it be some king OF o cockpit or
darling chile o. Bakkus. who always tries to