Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-10-28

NNOw, what does this mean, sir?" shout
ed the enraged husband, dashing up be-
fore the thunderstruck Colonel ssThis is
just what [ have been expecting for
long time! | knew there was some mis-
chief like this afoot! What are you here
for, sir? What are you doing in my
house? Tell me, sir, or march yourself
out quicker than you came in!''
The Colonel had got over his astonish-
ment enough to commence calm ex-
| PLANTATION, when Mrs. Frosty, bursting
into tears, threw herself before her an
CRY husband and implored him to be
silent; for it was only trifing mistake
and Col. Sawyer would Immediately ex-
plain it all.
| But the enraged man would hear moth
ing.
Leave the room!' he exclaimed to his
wife. "I'll hear nothing from you. I've
had disgrace enough brought on me al
ready. Leave the room!''
| And mortified and in tears, she passed
out, to brood over her misery and morti-
| fcation alone.
Col. Sawyer essayed to begin, though it
was exceedingly hard work, and he could
accomplish nothing but with almost su-
perhuman effort.
81 mistook the house, sir, that is all ;"
said he. "My Intentions were perfectly
honorable, and out of this house, sir, you
shall not call them in question without
| q ing held personally responsible. am
ute ready to leave the place, 1 assure
you.''
And he began to do so.
"That is very well to say" replied the
Jealous husband. II should advise you
for the future, however, to be little
careful before you go into other per-
sons houses, and see if your own num-
Der extends the whole length of the
street."
Col. Sawyer withdrew, resolved to have
no further words with such creature.
He saw that he was beside himself with
jealousy, and he knew that speech would
be wasted on him.
Perhaps 1T was a couple of months af-
ter this that a party of gentlemen, lin
gered rather late at luncheon at tavern,
and forgot that it was fairly O'Clock in
the afternoon, until they found it had
long ago struck 6. They were all Jolly
fellows; their eyes were flashing and
their cheeks were getting rosy. The
luncheon must have put them in the best
of spirits - or, rather, the best of spirits
in them.
Among them was Mr.. Andrew Eros
ty.
If there was any one of them very par
ticularly mellow" it was but fair to say
it was Frosty.
He had evidently improved bis oppor-
tunities during luncheon.
Going out into the bracing air after
such banquet, Mr.. Frosty began to feel
the effects very sensibly. By hook and
crook he finally sailed around to the
street in which his domicile stood, push
ing along till he thought he had got
about where he ought to live, and went
up the steps. After hanging up his
great-coat and hat in the hall, he stepped
along to the door of the dining-room and
opened it.
Who should suddenly appear to him as
he looked around the room but Col. Saw
yer, and Col Sawyer's wife.
Frosty rubbed his eyes, stammered,
made half bow, felt wholly lost, and fin
ally gave it up.
II DECLARE" he exclaimed, looking
banker than the wall, give mistaken the
house.
ooh, no, my dear SIR" said Col Sawyer
Immediately rising and going up to him,
you have done no such thing; you know
here to bring disgrace upon my family.
I've been suspecting this for some time, |
and now, sir, I'll just walk out myself
with you and be at the trouble of finding
your own house for you.
And upon this the Colonel put on his
coat and hat and insisted on accompany
ing the discomftted Mr.. Frosty home
Not syllable of explanation would he
listen to.
90, no, no?' he would say whenever
Frosty began to apologize. 'I under
stand it well enough. I see how it is.
It's all very well to say you've lost your
way into my house, but [ should for the
future advise you before going into other
persons houses, to ust look and see If
your own number runs the length of the
street."
Just the language Frosty had before
used to him, and just what sealed his lips
Frosty was foored completely. But that
was not the worst of it. The Colonel in
sisted on going home with him and 60
ing in, and he offered his services in such
a pleasant yet persistent way that Frosty
could not have shaken him off, even if
he were not himself rendered submissive
by reason of his own modification.
And the Colonel, therefore, went in and
told Mrs. Frosty about 1t, which so thor
oughly pleased that amiable lady, in view
of previous circumstances, she set up a
resistless laugh in the face of her humbled
lord, in the midst of which his escort
took occasion to withdraw.
But, Frosty was thoroughly cured of
his jealousy, for he admitted that it was
quite possible for a respectable man
to mistake even the number of his own
door.
The Dust Question