Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1886-03-13
NO THANKS FOR ME.

I've nothing to give thanks for" said
my Uncle Theron Banks to Aunt Hep
pie--short for Hepzibah-In response to
Aunt's declaration that she meant to kill
the fatted calf, or otherwise turkey, on
the coming holiday, and keep up the
customs Of her fOrelathers and the Gov
ernOrs proclamation.
''Well, whether We have or not, The
ron, - said his wife, ''I'l make believe and
do your thanking if you won't. I've
fatted the turkey on purpose, and I'm
drefful Gurus to know how them hams is
gOin' to turn out"
oval you kin do IS you please, Hep
pie, but 1 say amt got nOthin' to give
thanks for, and don't mean to make a
hypercnt Of myself by maxim bieve."
'Why, you've had good crops this
year." said Auntie smilingly; ''and we've
all had good health; that's somethin,'
amt it?
ayes! good crops, and all the money
III get from 'em IL be eat up IN law ex-
penses to keep Cousin The from gettin'
this farm away from me. He's no cousin
of mine, and L don't see what my father
was about to let his brother name such a
mis'able szinakadink after him. Why,
he's got more moneyin one day than I've
got in a year, and yet he begrudges me
this farm, which he's got a mortgage on,
and fOreclOsed it. Is that anything to
be thankful bout? p
"Wal, You know, Theron, that Cousin
Banks wouldn't be so hard on you if
you'd be a little kinder He says that
you set him at defiance, an so he's bound
to have his rights
"His rights, an what's he want with
his rights? He hasn't got wife, nor
chick, nor child, to leave it TO. He's
only a Unstable old bachelor, going about
seem who he may devour."
''What dye say, Theron, bout asliin'
Cousin Banks to come home with us from
church an take dinner" said Aunt Hep
pie, cOaxingly. .It'n show that what
ever the law may do to us, that we've
got Christian forgiveness? EhE'
what do L say?' said Uncle Theron,
sulkily. "Why L say, in the first place,
that amt going to church, and second,
that if yer did ask Cousin Banks he
wouldn't come, an if he did come L
wouldn't set at the same table. / amt
"a bleever in fOrgivin' my enemies afore
I'm asked. Why, the next thing You'll
NC eAa-4A4 INC 10 E4hG AA4hG AG44EL AAALlE
that got me down to York ten years ago
after swindlin' me outer $4,000, all
had IN the world, got me to mortgage
the farm to Cousin Banks, an then run
away with that"
'Oh, that ere's all in the past. Theron
an you kin forgive it now, an if We can't
you must ask the Lord to forgive him,
for I war'ent me the money never did
him any good"
"NO, I guess it didn't" said Uncle
Theron, ''if what I've heard's true. They
say he went to California, or somewhere's
out thar, an cut some Of his didOes and
them vigilance committees caught him,
an ju- t strung him up to a tree. That's
all the good my money did him"
"May the Lord have mercy on him, 80
said Aunt Heplbah, fervently.
"Ohl the Lord don't fret himself bout
such cattle, said Uncle Theron, irrever-
emily. 'sHe's got enough to attend to
with decent folks.
''Even to the lowlest and most sinful. 80
responded Aunt Heppie, humbly.
"Wal, I shan't go to church, - repeated
Uncle Theron. ''Ive got nuf to do
home, and don't feel thankful. It's a
foolish custom anyhow, and won't give
way to it.
And he did not. Uncle Theron was a
good man, but he was headstrong, and
for the last two years things had not
gone right with him, and he was irritable;
He had three daughters, but no son.
called him uncle, though he was nc
relative Of mine. My fathers farm
adioined his, and up to within a year
Uncle Theron had always treated me as
II / had been his son until I wanted to
make Lydia Banks. the eldest daughter
my wife, and then Uncle Theron was up
IL arms.
s.NoP' he said, sit can't be done
Lyddy's the beauty Of the family, an
she's got to redeem its fortune She's
got to marry rich"
This would have been a heavy blow il
Lydia had not declared that she would
marry nobody but me, even though she
waited for twenty or more years. AL
this did not improve Uncle Theron'l
temper, and when his cousin, also Theron
Banks, made his appearance at Little
field, after an absence OF five years, and
limited that Uncle Theron had not paid
any interest on the mortgage the fomei
held for i've years, the latter was wors,
than ever.
BIS bachelor cousin was rich-very
rich-and really did not care about tn,
$4,000 mortgage, but Uncle Theron
looked upon him as his creditor, anS
consequently his enemy, and so mad
him one by insulting him; and the ricl
man, who knew only business, said tn
mortgage had expired, and he must hav
principal and interest OF he would fore
close.
I knew all this, but what could I do
I could DO nothing 1 also knew, o
thought knew, that all the family wer
going to church except Lyddy, who wa
70 stay at home and cook the dinner, s
as to have Il ready Ca the return Wit
several guests. did not know Who bu
was invited by Aunt Heppls and mean
% 60. though i knew that Gnels There
loeEea disi.ua fully Ct me- hut ha