The Newberry herald and news. (Newberry, S.C.) 1884-1903, 1886-03-31

be found this side or on the othe
! side Of the Arctic regions? We have
! no doubt taat even in IIades some o
the culprits try to borrow coole
spots from their more favored neigh
! bors. Borrowers have no particula
cline or country. They are to bt
found everywhere and anywhere, ant
will borrow from pin to thousand
dollars aal down again to chew o
tobacco. The Chew tobacco" Dor
rover is generally first class deat
beat, fraud, sponger and nuisance
lie never secs YOU unless he wants 6
"ciew.'' lie is always Just out. .
No matter III what way you are en-
gagged, You must Dig your hands in
your pocket. pull ont your favorite
plug ana hand it over to lis tender
| mercics. Sometimes he is delicate
about the matter. and will call for
your knife. This requires another
dig in your pockets, and you may be
certain that the knife will make a
slip in the borrowers favor-about
three chews will 90 for one. Some.
times the sponger is more sociable,
and presuming that you are equally
so. will Just tear of what he wants
with his teeth. A rich joke is told
on one Of these frauds. He was a
gunner of gun No. 3 Of one Of the ar
tillery companies Of this State during
the war. lie was never known to
have any tobacco, and made it a
habit to beg ':chews'' from the men,
bcrs of his company generally. FL
nally the company gave a collation..
Regular toasts we're prepared and the
gunner Of No. 3 was informed that
he would be called on. Not know
ing what to say, he begged the cap
tain to prepare little speech. The
captain did so, and on the night in
question delivered the following,
which was received with shouts Of
applause:
'This is the gunner OF No. 3,
Who rams well and Sponges free"
Strange to say. he did not see the
Joke until it was afterwards explained
to him and received the applause
with great appreciation.
Tie newspaper borrower is another
nuisance. lie (or she) just thinks
that newspaper is common prop
erty, and will get as mad as thunder
whenever the paper is refused. The
newspaper borrower does not know,
perhaps. that whenever he Cor she)
sends for the paper, somebody is put
to the trouble CT hunting it up. The
family are all at dinner, perhaps, the
bell rings and the servant announces
that Mr.. Newshunter or Miss Cos
sipmonger wants to borrow the pa
per-" Some one must leave the ta-
bic to hunt for it, and don't you know
Mr.. Newshunter or Miss Gossipmou-
ger gets q blessing in the meantime?
The borrowing Of groceries is gene
rally polite way OF begging, and it
frequently happens that mean ar
ticle is returned for a good one.
Some people use the best Of every
thing in the line of cooking, and
others 90 for cheapness, In the
country this habit is excusable, but
in cities and towns, where there are
grocery stores at all the corners, the
practice is deserving of censure.
While on this subject we are re-
minded of some humorous lines which
appeared IN print some years ago,
and while We cannot quote them cor
rectlv from memory. the following
synopsis may be read to advantage
by some people. a gentleman ap-
piled to bis next door neighbor for
some books to read. The reply came
rs follows:
For my books | always have need,
But YOU may sit by my fire and read" "
Of course, this was only q polite
way of declining, but shortly after
wards tie other gentleman wanted to
borrow bellows to blow his fire.
lie applied to the book borrower and
received this answer:
Il don't lend ont my bellows. you know.
BIT you may sit by my fire and blow"
Columbia Record.
Is He An Office Seeker?