davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
4 Bad Practice.
EStelline Bell.
army.

What is the prisoner charged with
asked Dakota Judge of the man who
made the complaint.
He drew revolver and tried to shoot
me while we were playing game of Pok-
err"
What made him do it,"
He was trying to convince me it was all
right for him to have four aces when l had
one myself"
That's enough" replied the judge ex-
citedly, Il sentence him to ten years hard
labor!'
Hold on" put in the prisoner, ''aint you
sentencing me for pulling that gun on pref
ty slim evidence!"
THE sentence isn't for that but for
claiming there were five aces in pack of
cards"
But you haven't any more evidence on
that point"
Il don't need much evidence-I know
1T Is one of your tricks. have played
poker with you myself and you tried the
same game on me and 1 said then I'd get
even with you and l have. Mr.. Sheriff
take charge of the prisoner. III see if
this pernicious habit of running in
cold deck can't be stopped. The hope of
this country is the purity of the game"
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
4 Soldiers Bride.

General Sherman says in his Me
moirs:" II can see III memory a beau
tiful young city-bred lady, who had mar
ried poor second lieutenant md fol
lowed him to his post on the plains whose
quarters were in a dug -dut,' ten feet by
about fifteen, seven feet high, with dirt
roof; -four feet of the walls were of natur-
al earth..the other three of sod, with holes
for windows and cOrn-sacks for curtains.
This little lady had her Saratoga trunk,
which was the chief article of furniture
yet by means of a rug on the ground
floor, few candle boxes covered with red
cotton calico for seats. a table imprOvls
ed out of a barrel head. and the fireplace
and chimney excavated i'll the back wall
or bank, she had transformed her hole
in the ground" into most n tractive
home for her young warrior husband,
and she entertained me with a supper
consisting of the best coffee, fried ham,
cakes and jellies from the commissary,
which made on my mind an impression
more lasting than have any one of the
hundreds of magnificent banquets I have
since attended in the palaces and man
sions of our own and foreign lands"
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02

Are the dews very heavy here:" in
quired the guest who was waiting to be
sent as near to the roof as the shingles
would let him go.
Il should say So" replied the brisk
clerk. reassuringly; 80 and 81 have been
here six weeks, with five extras day.
without showing cent; 49, has been
owing us ever since last summer, three
parlors on the dining room tloorare more
than a month behind, and parlor \. who
has been here five weeks, borrowed S25
of the house last night and skipped with
months board and over 5000 on the
bar books. Heavy dues! Any baggage:
Pay in advance, please 'FRONT.' Show
the gentleman to $50, i'll the annex, and if
it isn't i'll order have it put in order right
away. Change you i'll the morning,
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
Snubbing a King.


The late King Ludwig of Bavaria often
Travelled incognito, and several years ago.
says a correspondent to the Leader, he
was visiting under the name of the
Count Won Berg at a villa on one of the
Swiss lakes. Here he lived all alone, and
had steamboat in which he sailed about
over the lake during the night, listening
to music played by one of his musicians
on the shore. 1t was on this lake that
the famous chapel to William Tell was To-
Gated, and late one evening the crazy
king concluded to visit it. 1t was after
the hour for admissian, and the attendant
who had charge of the chapel was at sup
per.
The king sent his servant to him, and
the servant announced that the Count Won
Berg wished to see the intersor of the
chapel.
1T is past the hour, was the reply, 'but
if the count will wait till 1 am done with
my supper 1 will bring the key
was fully twenty minutes before the
keeper came out, and when at last he came
to the bench upon which the king stood,
and said:
Good evening, Herr count"
King Ludwig was so mad that he wheel
ed round and turned his back to the chap
el keepers face.
Indeed" said the keeper. If that l. all
one gets for being obliging he might as
well not trouble himself" and he walked
off up the hill and left the king stand
ing.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
Variety in Food.


Often a sickly, waning appetite can be
stimulated by some exceedingly simple
change in the commonest articles of daily
food. Slices of dry bread are uninviting,
but the same bread lightly Drowned, with
a dellcately-poached egg resting on the
crisp toast becomes altogether another
item in the bill of fare. Cold beef or
mutton have become standard dishes for
wash day or other slim dinners. But an
accompaniment of pickles for the one.
and jelly for the other, makes all the diff
ference III the world between tasteful and
bald utilitarian housekeeping. Oatmeal
porridge is a most excellent breakfast
dish, yet it is well to occasionally substi-
tute in its place berries or other fruit or
even change to pearl hominy, or crack
ed wheat, or cornmeal mush. | know
there are forty different ways to prepare
potatoes, and should not be surprised to
learn that there may be fifty, yet how few
are the tables, especially in the country
where one sees this vegetable except in
the stereotyped boiled whole, mashed or
fried. A great variety of delightful dish
es can be made with apples at all seasons
of the year, whether one has fresh or
canned fruit. Breakfast, dinner or tea
need not lack n healthful relish if one has
dozen or So of apples within reach. |
do not enumerate the host of what are
known as made Dishes" which can be so
quickly and easily concocted out of rem
nantS.
| know it Is worth the trouble to set ON
the family table not courses of elaborate
dishes, but a wholesome, agreeable and
yet very economical diversity of good
food.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
ITO BIZ CoNTINUED.)
The Opium Habit in Prison.
San Francisco Call.

Director Sonntag stated that he had
received letter from Henry st. Clair, a
prisoner , asking that two months credit
which had been taken from him for
smoking opium be returned to him on &C
count of ill health. The letter, which was
written in neat, clerky hand. stated:
MY term does not expire for ten weeks.
for the reason that eight weeks credit,
have been taken from me. If l am kept
in this place that long / know | shall die.
l do not want to die in this prison.
have been here since 1874. For God. 5
sake, Mr.. Sonntag, do not compel me to
die in this place but give me back my
credits
The man was summoned before the
board.
A few minutes later a gaunt, emanciat-
ed prisoner, whose white corpse-like skin
seemed to hang loosely about his heshless
bones, staggered into the room and drop
ped into a chair. When he attempted to
speak a hOarse hollow cough that seemed
literally to rattle his bones prevented him.
He was victim of the opium habit and
consumption.
My name" he finally said in response
to queries, us st. Clair | have been here
twelve years. This is my third incarcera-
ton. The first time | was sentenced for
assault to murder, the second tine for
burglary, and the third time for assault
to rob-
Don't you think that you are pretty
bad sort of man them" asked Director
SOnntag.
May be So he replied after NOM
ent's thoughtful consideration of the pro
position. 1T was not my desire to be
bad though. 1t was liquor that has done
it,"
How long have you been smoking
opium"
Il do not smoke it | eat it. l have
been a victim for five years. Ten weeks
ago | determined to break myself. You
cannot realize what | have suffered
How did you get the drug"
I'm the prison yard"
''Who brings it in"
THE Chinese, | suppose. They sell it.
You can't keep the men from getting it if
they want it,
us it not brought in by visitors of the
prisoners"
The most of it, I think. But since
you have put up that wire screen to separ-
ate the prisoners from their visitors it has
been very hard to get opium. But for
Gods sake let me have my two months
credits. | do not want to die in this place
| think | could get well if | had my lib
erty again
He went out and his credits were restor-
ed to him.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
A Hostess With Tact.
c. o,5g Cfr-a n..

You talk OF tact.' said the shorthand
reporter. 4 remember a case of tact
that was as pretty as anything l can i'm
agine. 1t was at the house of governor
of a western state. His wife was one of
the most refined women / ever knew and
she was 'chock full of tact The gov
ernor had to give receptions to influential
men in the state, and you can fancy that
some of them were very uncouth and IN
educated One evening there was a large
dinner party, and rather rough old cove
very wealthy and important man, was
the chief guest OF course he sat on the
right side of the hostess. The dinner
went along very nicely. Beyond making
few rather gauche remarks the old west
ern fellow behaved very well. But when
the fnger-boxls were put on the table, he
was rather knocked over, and. like many
other heroes of such stories, he took his
up and drank out of it. Nobody happen
ed to see him except the hostess, and
quick a. a wink she signaled to the serv-
ants They removed every fnger-bowl
before anybody could touch them, and
the old fellow doesn't know to-day, If he's
living, what a mistake he made. Now.
that's taef.@
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
For de Iawd'S Ssket

The bsekwoods darkey diStrusts the BIZ
cycllSt. When party Of young men,
who lately rode the wheel from New Or
leans to Boston, LOO miles, were Skirting
a Georgia plantation, where an old white
haired colored man, his wife and two
children were hoeiug cotton, one of the
children saw them and ran to the mother,
Shrieking out:
NANNY nanny, hyar comes some
booger mans on wheels"
The old man looked up and excitedly
said:
DE Lawd save Us. Its old Satan him
Selfr'
Then the whole party went Scampering
over the field toward the house.
In several other instance the negroes
took TO flight on seeing the bicycliSt$
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02

he had succeeded as a guest at the hotel.
Did she still value his present to her IN re-
membrance of old times? No! She valued
it so little that she had evidently forgotten
il. Perhaps her maid might have Included
it among the small articles of luggage. Per
haps dear little Kitty might have put it into
one of her mothers trunks. In any case,
there it was, abandoned in the drawer of a
table at an hotel.
oh" he thought bitterly, ''if l could only
feel as coldly towards Catherine as she feels
towards mel" His resolution had resisted
much: but this final trial of his self-control
was more than he could sustain. He drop
ped into a chair-his pride Of manhood re-
c0led from the contemplate weakness of
crying-he tried to remember that she had
divorced him and taken his child from him.
In vain, In vain, He burst into tears.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
Two Prophets.
Atlanta Constitution

1t is said that the weather prophets of
this country are considering the pro
prlcty of meeting in Il sort of general
congress. 1t seems that they have diff
fered so widely in their prophecies that
people have failed to pay them the atten-
ton they think they deserve, and they
now desire to try and arrange a schedule
by which tLey may secure uniformity.
The proposed congress suggests an Incl
dent which occurred in Harris county
some time ago. Two weather prophets
announced that on certain day a cy-
clone would whirl through the county.
One declared that it would come in the
morning and the other in the afternoon.
On the evening preceding the day fixed
by them for the cyclones visit they met at
the court house i'll Hamilton. warm
dispute as to which prophecy would prove
to be correct took place between them
eliminating i'll "A fight in which both were
badly disfgured Next day two cyclones
visited the county, one in the morning
and one i'll the afternoon. The day fol
lowing tue two prophets compromised their
differences and formed a partnership for
the publication of an almanac.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
Not to he Blutied.
De troit Free Press.

"President and wife git in town last
night?' he cOntidentially inquired on the
market.
mo, sir. They are not coming this
way
They amt! Don't they take in Detroit
on their bridal tour"
"No."
wall, that's funny They got the story
all over our snayborhood that the presi-
dent and his wife would be here to-day.
and nothing would do but the old woman
must ride in with me to- day to see them
Say, Jane, this man says they won't be
here"
Il don't believe it," she bluntly re-
piled.
Il assure you, madam, that any such re-
port Is false. The president and wife are
in Washington"
She would not be convinced until her
husband had inquired of several other
persons and always received the same re-
plies.
We'll, you have had your trip for moth
ing"
Il guess not" she replied, as she climb
ed down over the wheel. Samuel. the
first thing on the programme is ginger
ale. Then comes soda water with sarsa-
parilla strip. Then well have peanuts
and popcorn, and if we feel like it we'll
spread out some on candy. I'm going to
show the president of the United States
that he cant bluff me with n cent"
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
Ii Didn't Work.

When the employees of an Indiana furni-
turo factory operated by German struck
for eight hours work day he granted IT,
but when they wanted ten hours pay for
eight hours work he called them up and
said:
My frens, maybe l do ash You like. l
hat an order from Sh.gago for ten dozen
shairs. l Will sheep him eight dozen
und bill him for ten. If he doan kick on
me it shows me dot der rule works both
WAYS und we vhas all right
1t is needless to add that the idea didn't
work and that his men are receiving
eight hours pay.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02

John Kuhn. of Lafayette Ind, had a very mar
row escape from death. This is his own story:
'OHe year ago was in the last stages Of Con
sumption. Our best physicians gave my case up.
/ finally got SO low that our doctor said could
not live twenty four hours. My friend then pur-
chased bottle of DIR. WIN. HALLS BALSAM
FOR THE LUNGS, which benefited me- l con-
tinucd until am now in perfect health, having
used no other medicine"
That mo lobster is fit for food which is not
1O,a inches in length is u truth applicable 10 the
SeaSIn.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
A True Breton.
St. James'S Gaze tie

Old Jules Simon and Ernest Renan
with some brother Bretons. met together
this week in Paris to pat each other on
the back and praise up their dear
country of the west" The object of the
Bretonic muster was to celebrate the sue
cessful publication of the Revue Illustre
de Bretagne eft d'Anjou" recently started
The two Breton mOnarchs. who affection
ately addressed each other as Simon and
Renan. easily proved that Bretagne was
the best of all the French Provinces. and
solemply avowed to sustain the national
sentiment. They regretted that Bretagne
was becoming less the Bretagne of their
youth. and deplored that their country
men had become addicted to speaking
French instead of Breton.
Mr.. Renan, 1t seems. owns some prop
erty at Treguir and Jules Simon, when
making one of his periodical pilgrimages
to the haunts of his friend. received a
complaint from a tenant that the learned
proprietor would never make repairs. In
quiries, however. elected the fact that the
tenant never paid the rent. He asked the
old woman who showed him over the
house at Treguir. where Renan was born.
if the English ever came to see Remains
birthplace.
Yes" she replied.
Then" said he. 1.-The next time they
come sell them the pen with which NJ
Renan wrote The Life of Christ: they
will give you something handsome for it,
unfortunately" she responded, Il
have not got it" and then. after mo-
ment's reflection. proved herself. as NJ
Simon said, a true Breton, by adding, Il
will go and buy two hundred tomorrow"
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02

mind that his rash wager had been &C
cepted. He therefore went out and Law
lshed his weeks salary on new spring
hat. Of course, he had never seen Miss
Williams, and could not tell what kind of
a hat would be becoming. At venture
he selected a blonde hat, fifteen hands,
with an expensive girth, to tit high fore
head. The affair has cast a gloom over
his humor that bodies i'll for the efferves-
cent state column of his paper.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02

The same care in the selection of seed
should be made as with the other plants.
Productiveness, maturity and form are
fully as important as size All plants in
tended to produce seed for another sea-
sons crop should not only be selected, but
planted away from other varieties. Sweet
corn growing in the neighborhood of field
corn will be ruined for seed the succeed
ing year.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
E0IGu ON PILES V

Why suffer piles' Immediate relief and COM
plete cure guaranteed. Ask for Rough on Piles ~
Sure cure for itching, protruding, bleeding or
any form of Piles. soc. At druggists or mailed.
Nine.tenths of the railway bridges in this coun-
try, which carry twenty trains per day over them
with perfect safety, would break down, it is said
very quickly under twenty trains per hour.
Mensman's Peptonized Beef Tonic, the
only preparation of beef containing its eHtirr
nutritious properties. 1t contains blood making,
force generating and life sustaining properties;
invaluable for Indigestion, Dyspepsia, nervous
proSratton, and all forms OF general debility;
also enfeebled conditions whether the result of
nervous proStration overwork or acute disease,
particularly if resulting from pulmonary com
plants. CAswELL, HAZARD & Co., proprietorS.
New York. Sold by druggists.
An autograph of jefferson Davis sold in New
York recently for 81. 1t is not stated the exact
denomination of the check to which his name N,as
subscribed.
If afflicted with Sore Eyes use Dr.Isaac Thomp-
sons Eye Water. Druggists sell it. 25c.
1t cost Liverpool 100000 TO entertain her ma
jesty, the queen of England, during her recent
visit TO that city. Liverpool would become bank
Tupt if the English sovereign should decide to
locate there permanently.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
WELLS HAIR BAISAM.

II gray, restores to original color. An elegant
dressing, softens and beauties. No oil nor
grease. A Tonic Restorative. Stops hair com
ing out; strengthens cleanses heals scalp.
The Sioux Indians near Saskatoon have refused
To take their seed this snrinr.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
She Knew Mans Weakness.

Mr.. Average-My dear, never refused
you money In my life. What do you go
through my pockets that way for:
Mrs Average-Bless you love, do not
look through your pockets in search of
money
What them
The letters gave you to mail"
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
Most liberal Oaerr

The NoLTAIc BEiT Co Marshall, Mich. offer ~
send their Celebrated NuLrAIC BELTS and Electro
fcted with Nervous Debility, Loss Of Vitality.
Manhood, etc. Illustrated pamphlet in sealed eu-
yelope with full particulars, mailed free Write
them at once.
Frederick Stone, the professional runner, has
made a winning at last Unable TO overtake any
male competitor he has run away with girl
from Pierre, Oak.
Five dollars can be saved every wear in boots
and shoes by using Lyons Heel SuffenerS, costs
only 2oc.
Bavaria appears to be a great kingdom-for
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
Worse than the Lookup.

good-lOOking New Yorker was in
town last week, and one night he fell into
the hands of the police and had to send
for friend to get him out. On their
way home the friend was shaking him up
for being caught.
why the mischief" he said, didn't
you tell the cop you were a congressman,
and he wouldn't have locked you up"
Il lhic) l s'h'd rather (hic) been locked
up" he stammered with a maudlin smile.
Further argument was useless.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
IRVING Ia Place the Doctor.
1sa<aS Stiffness

frankie, dear. who is this DR.. Spitzka
who declares there is no suSh thing as
epidemic hydrophobia:"
"Spitzka, Spitzka-re really, don't know
the inventor of the Spitz dog, sup
pose"
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
Where To Find the Dutiiul Mother.
"eyaS SiftincS

Say, bub, is that your mother on the
front steps,
Nav; that's the hired girl. Jenny"
Can | see your MOTHER
Easy 'nough; go round to the kitchen
door"
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02

Start the bile, relieve the bilious stomach thick,
aching hsad and overloaded bowels. Small gran
uleS, small dose, big results, pleasant il oper-
alton, don't disturb the stomach. &c.
The steam Great Eastern will hereafter he
used as a coal harE-h at GihraItnr-
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02

AMONG TIE 80 kinds of Cloth Bound Do' r
Volumes given away by the Rochester q. y
american Rural Home for every 81 susscrIpu @,
t. that Great page, - col, 10 year old We, II,
CsIi 5x7 inches, from 800 to 900 pages bound in
q ~, are:
Law without Lawyers. Danelson' CIedicalJ Com
Family c. clOpedls seIlOr.
Farm CyClOpedia. Boys Useful PaStimes
Farmers and Stockbreed FiycYears Before the Mas'.
ers' Guide. Peoples History Of United
Common Sense In Poultry States.
Yard. Universal His. Of all Ma
World CycIopedia. tons.
What ANY One Should Popular History Civil War
Know. Cboth sides)
Aoy one book and paper one year postpaid,
tl.15 only! Satisfaction guaranteed. Refer
euce: Hon. C. r PARSONS, Mayor Rochester.
Samples cents. RURAL HOME Co, LTD, Roch
ester, y V.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
Cyclones and TOrnadOes.
Miupepolis Journal

A son of Erin was imparting wisdom
to group of idlers this morning as they
watched the storm in the sky, and took
occasion to silence one of his audience.
who called it cyclone, thus:
"Gowan now! It's no cyclone, but
bit of tornady. Whisht, now, an I'll
give ye the difference betune the two o.
thin, so as ye kin always discriminate.
Its loike what man said was the differ
ence betune rumatiZ and newralogy. Put
yer finger in a wise an screw 1t up till ye
can't shtand the pain any more an that's
rumatiz; then give it three turns more
and that's newralogy. The tOrnady is
rumatiz. me bye, and the cyclone is the
newralogy. Sees"
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
4 Word to the Wise is Sufficient.
Philadelphia Times

Dilly-dallying Lover-Look at those
two birds, Maria. What a chattering
they keep up around the door of that
rustic bird house! 1t Is charmingly rur-
al. isn't 1t!
Disheartened Maria (crisply)-Yes.
What can they be saying to each other
DEAR"
Saying: Let Us get married and keep
house"
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02

The state of Rhode Island militia. by
orders through A. G. o., have adopted the
new code for signaling by flag and torch,
or that known a the English Morse
Code, just adopted by the United States
army.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
" CROUCH on CATAEgUn

corrects offensive odorS at once. Complete cure
Of worst chronic cases; also unequalsd as garEle
for diphtheria, sore throat, foul breath. Doc.
Two boys in Boston, made i'll by poison in brown
cloth hnrnlN eScanel death
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-02
: ROUGH ON ITCH

Rough on Itch" cures skin humors, eruptious,
ring worm, letter, salt rheum, frosted feet, chill
blains Ach. ivy poison, BARRIERS itch. Doc, jars.
Riel rebellion.