Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1886-04-01

all the fun comes off-Boston Tran
scripf. ~
ID He E8ds AecFetFy d Shts & lis
Ndoesn' receive anybody" AsHM right;
I'll come some day when he isn't in. p
French Paper.
He-Are you fond of reading fiction?
She-Very. He-Are you reading the
serial. Sweet !: Birdie Simpson, now
running In Che CsoyS doatnhif ddksAsp
She-Yes, and all the articles on the late
E Eel5 San. tAIPb5 tfAfIPb5fffSY fffS - fss1'ss44ff'l- sss4ff tn
~ The newspapers are full of prescrip-
= tions for the cure of hydrophobia. What
we consider the best prescription of all
has not yet been published. 1t is this:
Cold lead, one-haf ounce. Directions:
apply internally to the dogs head.-,&.
Louis CD.
A western exchange says: Pyramid
Lake, in Nevada, has fallen eight and
Mud Lake has risen twenty feet in the
lestyeaf "a vel pedpIe have fheN eNef.
nUntery to Claim that Nevada Is devoid
of excitement and growing dull and un-
interesting.-Puck.
-yJYhnny Gust after SundaySshooD (; s
'Say, Jack, WHAT Is a sockdolagerp'''
Jack-"Why, don't you knowa That's
Vhat.they singin church when they get.
ready to go home. The minister gets
up and says: Let us now sing the sock
dolager. BOSTON Beacon.
Two card-playng friends were passing
through q pine forest in Maine, when
ore asked the other ythis audacious
eenundfum:S@Why oahuO& the proprietor
of this forest fell his own timberP' "Be-
cause NO one is-ailowcd to cut wi1em It is
his own deal Shoe and Leather Re-
porter. ttt'b h o
"Yes," said Bobby's father, as he
stroked his little boys head fondly,
Bobby is keeping bank for his odd
pennies and nickels.' = '.And how much
have you got saved up, Bobby" asked
the visitor Twelve cents he replied,
"besides the 1925 pa owes it.'-M 7.
Times. S.t Il. 6.3n. y!aas,
This story is told Of Bishop Macrorie.
He was sitting next Yankee navy cap
tain, who said to him: ''You have in
your province two rival bishops. c.
and another fellow--to which of them
do you inclinep'' 81 am the other fel-
low" said Bishop Macrorie.- Lirjng
Church. mt pb Vi
"Pap," said little Jacob, looking up
from his Sunday-school paper, 'here is
a piece that says Beer versus Whisky
Shall read itp'' "Trow dat paber in
de schtove, Shaky. Inny mans vot says
beer is worse as visky amt fit for nod
ings except kindling-vood. y Biwg-
haatois Republican. 2
"Shine 'em uppa?''s. said an Italian
bootblack to Pat, Just landed. sPhat's
the chargea'' asked Pat. at'Five centa."
"Begorra," said Pat, as he seated him
self in the chair, cit isf.a foine country,
Ameriky, where poor Oirishman car
get his boots BACKED by "a gintleman
wild goold rings in his ears. ~. T.
San. aa ..o.Te 90
Brown-sI don't see how YOU can
find time to 60 to church every Sunday.
I'm sure can't, I've so much to do.'
Fogg-"Yes, | suppose you do turn off
good deal of work Sundays. wish l
could do it; but the fact is, / can't go
without my sleep as well as you cam
Wonder what he meant!.- Boston Tran
script. ,-ae ESD .iaii32I@a 59@
A little 3-year old who has several
times visited the dime museums with
his parents, was Sunday taken to church
with member of the family, and after
returning home was asked by his father
what he saw. 'Well, = said the young
ster, f''a man got up and shook his arms
and talked; but I didn't like it much,
because they didnltilet us see the monk
eys."-St Paal Pioneer Press. i,A fa1a'
Sim sorry observed the, parishioner,
tythat can't pay my pew-rent this quar-
Ter t.pm very sorry too, Mr. Jones' =
returned the clergyman; 'Ipresume you
lost your money gambling in estoeksF'l
EMO, r can't say, that I did ..ssThen in
speculating in oilp' ssNo.e To tell the
truth, + did not. I attended your church.
fair the other evening and got roped in
;, to aplottery.n "Or'SPuck PA
Tive. .beggats, whogply heir trade h6,
Fifth avenue, ARE taking leisurely stroll,
when they meet another of their guild,
who lifts his hat to them with great re-
spect. One Of the two isaboutto return
the salutation with equal suavity. s'Hold
on!'' cries the other, ttwhat are you up
- What's the matterp" why
with whitening contempt<rche begin
the Fourth Ward n u NY Mail. i ~ 4