Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-09-22
BRIGHT BITS.

THE home rule that is embodied in no latch
key and having to carry your wife's break
fast to bed is not the one that we are voting
Tor very unanimously ReUer AdOGHce.
Mrs. OPPENHEIMER.-IsaacP
Mr.. Oppenheimer-Vot lie id, RepeccaY
Mrs. Oppenheimer-De der photographer
TO make desc diamonds earrings look like real.
~ CAGc000 Rambler.
VICTORIA MoRosINI SCHELLING seems to
have disappeared etfectually. Seems to us a
search ought to be made to see if she dldpt
fall down one of the Casino stage traps
Rochester Post Cypress,
"My mamma gives me penny every day."
said little girl to her companions, ''for tax
ing dose of castor OIL"
what do YOU do with 30 much money!"
"Oh. mamma saves il up to buy the oil
with.''
WE never deal N innuendos. Therefore
when brother editor calls us a llar,we have
right to demand that he shall produce some
other proof of his charge besides that of our
general reputation in thecommunity.-CheeE
toeoog1 (Pd.l Visitor.
OMAHA MIss-I see the English have a
queer fashion. After the period of deep
mourning is over, ladies make no change ex-
cept to wear light gloves.
Young widow-Yes. dear, it shows that the
hand has passed the mourning stage If the
heart hasn't.-OmdhG World.
WOULDN'T you think that girls would shrink
from appearing in such short bathing
dressesp" said old Mrs: CrimsOnbeak to her
daughter, while watching the bathers at
Long Branch.
'Well. they don't mother; they expect the
clothes to do all the shrinking"
MRS. BLANK. who was posing at seaside
resort, was possessed of some charms, but was
rather dull "What makes you look so tired
when you're bathing meY' she inquired one
DAY of young Ponsonby Jones.
ut always makes me weary to exercise
with dumb BELLE" ungallantly responded
Mr.. Jones.-Pttts6wr0 Dispatch.
THE farmers in one of the upper Michigan
counties met together on recent Sunday to
compare notes, and it was found that the Oat
crop of each one had been failure. After a
long period OF silence one of them inquired
"Well, can anything be done about it?''
"Certalnly there can" was the prompt and
vigorous reply. LET us at once pass reso-
luton condemnng the Vaccinations of those
human hyenas who control Wall street."
1t was duly passed, and the trio went down
cellar for drink of hard Cider Wall Street
Nel0S.
WATER GIRL ito commercial traveler)-
There's roast beef and roast duck.
Commercial Traveler-Canvas back duckP
Walter Girl-Yes.
Commercial Traveller facetiouslyl-Is it
shIrred down the front with lace cuffs turned
back over the sleeves, MaryP
Waiter Girl-The same.
Commercial Traveler-I will try some of it,
guess.
Waiter Girl-very well, sir; with or with
out2
Commercial Traveler-with or without
what?
Waiter Girl-Buttons.-Neqo York Tribune.
A TAXING ADMINISTRATIONS bclated
tourist strays into the city of Washington, ID.
c. "Where's the President?" he wants to
know.
up in the Adirondacks. watching the lake
trout taken"
where's the Secretary OF State9'
"Down the coast, seeing the Yankee fisher
men taken"
where's the Attorney Generalr
Down in Arkansas, having some deposit
tions taken.'
where's the Secretary of the InteriorP"
"Out West. having some Indians taken to
new reservations"
~ here the Secretary OF the Treasury"
I'm New York, having a new loan taken"
"Where's Mrs. Cleveland?"
Down at Princes, having her photograph
taken"
Tourist goes to the station AMI takes the
train.-Brooklyn Eagle.