The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1886-09-17
VOL. XXXI----NO. 80.
VARIETIES.
ALL honest men will bear watching. 1t
is the rascal who cannot stand 1t.

| All honest men will bear watching. It
is the rascal who cannot stand it,
1t is always good to know il only in pass
ing, charming human being 1t reffeshes
one like flowers and woods and running
| brooks.
II am satisfied ON every point but one,"
said gentleman to an applicant for service.
| VI cannot get over your nose" THAT Is not
to be wondered at, sir" replied the applicant,
"for the bridge is broken
| -Jones-"And you say your mother-in.
law has recently changed for the better, be-
come quite amiable." Smith-"Yes, she re-
minds me offs ship that has Just come into
port" Indeed How sop" "She has just
dropped her rancor."
Clara (Bobby's big sister, ~ heard father
calling you little while ago."
Bobby-"Did he say Robert or Bobby
Clara-"He said Robert"
Bobby with serious look In his eyes)
Then guess had better see what he
wants"
-Peterby: THE French people are a
wonderfully appreciative lot You may see
monuments to their great men all over the
country Now, understand, they are going
to erect one to the memory Of Rabelais"
Hawkins Hem hadn't heard of that.
Did he have wonderful memory, then ?"
Gold fish are generally considered TO get
enough to sustain them In the water they are
kept IN, which should be changed every day,
They should be removed from their globe to
a basin for about an hour. In the basin
lew Dread-crumbs may be put, but they
should never be put into the globe, as they
soon turn sour in the water and would iniure
the fish.
The mint julip is an old colonial Virgin
ian drink. 1t was invented in Virginia by a
wealthy planter, who had q company offfiends
at his house. A great hai.storm came up;
he gathered the hailstones, and on the inspira-
ton of the moment, concocted that delicious
beverage which we call mint julip. Its fame
spread, but at first they never made it except
when it hailed.
"A card of the Venus de Milo having been
brought for Christmas gift, and having,
after much discussion, been appropriately
placed, the family assembled to admire.
Among them was the darkey servant, who,
after testifying her appreciation, turned to
her mistress to ask, with an expression of
earnest curiosity: us that the fashion now
no arms and no clo's~
Albert Gall was at the shooting park the
other day, when two gentlemen approached.
"Mr. Gall, said one "allow me to introduce
Mr. NORWOOD. of Davenport, Ia"
"What namep"
"Wormwood," was the answer.
"Ah," said Mr.. Gall, "Ive often heard your
name coupled with mine. Pleased to meet
you. Gall and Norwood Shake"
A young midshipman lately went out to
join his ship. He was met on deck by the
captain, who said:
"Well, youngster, 80 you have come to join
us? suppose it's the old story-the fool of
the family, Ell? Haw! haw p
To which the midshipman cutely replied:
"Oh, no, sir, it's like everything ese-alI
changed since your day"
The captain decided not to pursue the
question.
"A gentleman who had been in town,
only three days, but who had been paying at
tention to prominent belle, wanted to pro.
pose, but was afraid he would be thought to
be too hasty. He delicately preached the
subject as follows: "If were to speak to
you ofmarrlage, after having only made your
acquaintance three days ago, what would you
say ofit?" well, I should say Never put
off till tomorrow that which you should
have done the day before yesterday"