New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1886-07-25
IN THE COURTS.
AMUSING INCIDENTS OF PRACTICE.


aid a. that portion Of tho school atlas on which
the Desert Of Great Sahara 10 represented. Not
spear or y blade Of the growth which ordinarily
conceuls tho chronological pcculiarites OF MANKIND
n Visible upon his head. It Is said that in HE
youth no had luxuriant hair which has been graz
uslly worn away by constant friction with knotty
Law poiutA Il 10 sensitive subject with MIN. anu
he kcenly rosents tho slightest alluson 70 tno
denudod condition Of his scalp One day IN the
Supreme Court no was defending the company 10
suit for damages brought by q weilknown irlsn
lawyer on behalf Of laborer who had been in)ureA
In q rslrosl accident. The plaintiff on the VIII.
ness stand told how wound had been inh'c'eo
upon his head, in consequence OF which no nau
sufFered great physical pain and mental anguish.
losing his situ alton, being prevented for weeks
from doing any work, and altogether sustaining
An amount of injury for hich $1,000 would bus
feobly compensate him. The man iookod hoai."y
and there were no visible marks OF tho hurts "n'ch
he asserted that he received. MS lawyer OK
planned this to the jury. you see'" no fad' tho
exn,,eraut norton of capillary substance Wnlcn
bountcous nature has placed upon the cAput OF my
client makes it impossible to locate the cicatrx OF
.h. wound 70 your satisfaction. But" continued
tho LAWYER placing himself behind the chair Of tho
counsel for the company l can locate the precise
.not on nv learned friends head" at the same
moment placing his hand on the bare poll Of his
opponent and can"
@Take your dirty hands Of my hesdw shouted
the Defendants lawyer. springng to his feet.
The gavel of tho Court raped sharply for order
and ono of the officers separated the counseliors
before there was any blood shed.
A counsellor who is q great believer in the laws
DELAYS and never loses au opportunity to profit by
them. recently moved IN the Superior Court for
the postponement OF o case in which he was
attorney Tor the defendant. His opponent, who
was an xious to proceed with the trial. said "Ths
10 the fifth time that You have madc excuses for
not going on with this matter. Your Honor Ito the
juLgo) this case has been adjourned on his motion
every time have always been ready for trial and
/ think he has had Indulgence enough. The in
forests of my client are suffering on account oi
these continued delays"
altis impossible" replied the dlstory lawyer
= for me to proceed Mt this time My wife has just
had a baby and have hadxn time to prepare
myself"
"Oh we'll" answ ered the counsel for the
plaintiff, testify, "you always have some excuse
/ hayo never asked for any delay In every
instance in which motion has been made for an
adjournment you have boen responsible tor it."
IL hope yOu don't consider mo Responsible LOT
this one" replied the procrastinating barrister;
and them noticing the smile upon tho face of the
Judge. lie added quickly " 1t wasn't my fault and
assure your Honor this will be the last time"
Amid tho general laughter that this accustomed
tbe speakcr sank into his chair in helpless con.
fusion. The Judge. with his handkerchief pressed
70 his mouth with difficulty mastered his desire
TO shout. ana intimated with wave of his hand
that tile case might go over for the term
A anarrei betweon two ncighborng dealers in
Old clothes, in what was known as Chathamst.
before tho recent ordinance changing its name
became law, took the form of litigation some
time ago One sued the other for Islander and the
case tried IN the Superior Court, resulting as.
astrously to the defendant. The attorney OF the
latter was q Young lawyer of high character we'll
verse4i 10 the law. and be did all that could he
done TO save his client from dscomiiture. but tho
weight of evidence was on the other side. After
the trial was over this lawyer and his client walked
from tho e@nrtio"m mo ii The foowin1 colloonv
well. veil" SAID the secondhand clothing man,
shal,inV his hand under the young lawyers nose.
Svot for hrc you. say IL yos TO WIN tne case;
wasn't it, aud vot for you don't win i'll 'ot for
You retained me-" replied the COUNSEL with
dignity, TO defend tins SUIT d't u, so TO e tine pest
Of my ahlity You lo.t IT because the evidence Oh
T,, strong! Vat for Won don't tell me dot
bcfurri ccnld buy three witnesses to hls one II
The upright young practitioner turned away IN
disgust and his client followed him down stairs
shouting f." Vot for yot fort brings yon all the
witnesses Won want, VOt for hire you. ha
4 practitioner at the bar who hal Is from the land
Ol Sheridan aud Burke causes much amusement IN
shouli,rri heavy man. and when he walks tho
floor as In his custom when examining witness.
H. rakes noise sometimes than Is avrccsbe To
The Court Not long ago he was engaged in trial
Le.orc Justice IN District Court. Inc court
rom. which was over s,a,tS, was 'a. a,,r1 snaky
witness for the plaintiff. and his testimony was
damaging to the defendant who was represented
by the lawyer referred to. After the direct exam.
inat,oE the counsellor took the witness in hand
aud. who cross examining HIM. began 10 walk
heavily up and down as il determined to shake the
4 hat had bppn "
.Whcre were you born. Denis" he asked
" In ireland, sir" was the answer.
.Y"s YES. any one eau soc that; but In what
part Of the old land ~
" In Ball yoDasloc, sir" m
And who was your fathcrf
GPatrick Mccarthy. sir.
Aud what was his businessT
He was - blacksinith. ST.
What! at the crossroads"
aYcr hand. Denis; tpausina in his walk and
wrngiug the hand Of the witness 81 knew yer
father we'll. me boy. Many, a time and OF have
yer father and I traversed the green bills and
Daug. Bang! Bang. rcsounded the gavel OF
the Judge. "Counscllor." said his Honor. please
IT. family Savs to an" GHnn ny
tL> without referring to recolt ctious OF your
carly life in Ireland"
IAN right sir" responded the lawyer. and he
resumed his ponderoos tramp under which the
building fairly shook and. having won the heart OF
the witness. proceeded to intnre him to tax" back
some of bis first statements against his client. 1he
Judge who knew the insecure condition OF the
floor. became pervons. doubtless fearing that the
heavy barristcr would carry tho entire court with
him down into tho stable below. if lie continued
his walking up and down. "COunsel will please
take his seat at the table," be said. as the build
inc is rather unsafe"
IL will. yer Honor will" replied the barristcr
aud he sat down. Presently he started up again
and resumed his walk.
Bang. lang! Bang went the qavel again
"Sit down. said the Judge; " l iusist upon your
sitting down."
The lawyer paused in front of the bench. folt cd
his arms and drew himself up to his iul height:
sYer Honor" he said, as counsellor at law of
the Supreme Court of the State of New-Y York ]
claim tho inalena6lc right to peram5uiate the
floor OF the Temple of Justice. and, by the powers,