The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1886-04-13
Bill Nye on Hotels.
Chicago News.

In western city there stands q rest
taurant that has outside as q sign, unde-
o glass case, q rib roast, q slice OF ham,
and 20 reest- -<suek@ that 4femember die-
tinctl7 hating seen there in 1850 end.
before the war. asked an epictire the
other day it be thought it right to keep
those things there year after year when
so many were starving throughout the
length and breadth Of the land. He
then stfaightway did take ne up close
so that could see that the food Vas
made 0f plaster and painted. as heretos
fore set forth and by me translated. %
Walt Whitman would say. 2
There are Two kinds Of guests vho
live at the average hotel. 0ae is tbe
party who gets up and walks over the
whole corps de hoies from The basds
headed proprietor 10 the boot black,
while the other Is The meek and mild!
eyed man, doomed 10 sit at The table and
bewsil the fight Of time And the horrors
Of starvation while waiting for the rec
lief party to come with his food.
belong 10 the latter class. Born, -
| was. in private family and early aes
quirins the habit OF eating food that wa5
to nssusge hunger mostly, Il
takes me good while to accustom mys
self to the style Of dyspeplic microba
used simply TO ornamentea bill Of fare.
Or course it is maintained by come hoiel
men that food solely for eating purposes
is becoming obsolete and oufrs. and that
the stuff that they put on their bills OF
fare is just rs good TO pour down the
back OF guest as diet that 10 cooked
for the common, low, perverted tastes Of
people who have no higher aspirations
than to eat their food.
OF course the genial, urban and tals
ented reader will see at once the style Ul
hotel am referring to. It IL the hotel
that apes the good hotel and prints
bill of fare solely as literary effort -
That is the hotel where You fiud the
moth eaten towel and the bed-ridden
coffee. There is where you get butler
that runs the elevator daytimes and
sleeps on the q ,nnel cakes at night. l
also refer to the hotel where the beIl.
boy Is simply an animated polisher Of
hsnistels. and Otherwise extremely ise-
less 1t is likewise. the house where the
syrup tastes like the tincture OF rhubarb,
and the pancakes taste like hektograpt.
The travelling man will call to mind the
hotel to which I refer, and be will in
stantly name It and tell you that be has
never spent the Sabbath there.
Some people can live on cracked
wheat, bran and skinned milk, no mat.
ter where they GO, and they always seem
to be perfectly happy: but while sim-
plicity is my watchword, and while am
Old Simplicity himself, as il we're, 1
haven't been constructed with slomach's
enough to successfully wrestIe with these
things. like few plain dishes With
victuals on them, cooked by person
who has had some experiences ia that
line before. am not so especially tied
to high prices and 6nger-bowls, for 1
have risen frcm the common people. and
during the frst eighteen years Of nv
life ! had TO dress myself. was NOT
always the pampered child OF enervatiug
luxury that now am bv any means.--
SO can subsist for weeks on good plain
food aud never murmur or repine; but
where the mistake at some hotels seems
to have been made is in trying to issue
a bill OF fare every day that will attract
the attention OF literary minds end Z
cite the curiosity Of linguists instead Of
people who desire to assuags m inter.
nal craving for grub. use the term
grub in its broadest and most compre.
hensive sense. Too much OF our hotel
food tastes like the second day Of Jan.
uary or the ftth day Of July. That's
the whole thing in few words, and nm
less the good hotels are nearer together
We shall have to multiply our cemetery
facilities.