Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1886-10-23
ONE WILDCAT BY POST.

Plot by Humorous Citizens OF Guntown
TO Got Rid Of a Postmaster.
New York Sun.
The postmaster at GuntOwn, n. III,
died about a year ago, and cOLsiderabl
trouble has been experienced in finding
a new one who would be satisfactory
and competent. For a long time there
was no appointment, the diDlinutive
weekly mail being opened on arrival by
the first man who happened to get it.
At length the people concluded to pet-
ton for the appointment Of Sim Duff,
who keeps a saloon here. He was a
jackson democrat, and his standing in
the community was good. The only
other men in the town who had the Ia
ciities fol keeping the Office were
another saloon keeper named Fritz, and
grocer, who also kept liquor, named
Beebe. AS the request for Duff's ap-
pOintment was almost unanimous, it was
supposed that he would get the place,
but after a while Beebe was appointed,
as the special agent at Santa Fe ez-
planned, because Duff kept a saloon, and
It was against the policy of the admins
tration to appoint a saloon keeper. That
made everybody mad. BeeDe had never
been popular, was unable to read OF
write, and was, moreover, a very stupid
fellow not more than half Witted, as some
people said.
To get even with all hands the citizens
held a meeting and put up a job which
was sometime in coming to head. Beebe
in the meantime, had received his com
mission and was doing his best with the
mails. One day last week old Herrck
Price, who used to live in Tennessee,
drove up in front OF Beebe's place,
hitched his horses, and yanked q young
wildcat out of his wagon. The beast
was frisky and ugly, but apparently not
dangerous. On his collar was card
bearing the address:
To the President Of the United states. from tho
Grateful Democratic Citizens of Guntuwn,
n. M.
A natural curiosity Democratic from tip 70 tip.
Feed him ana trsat him gently. Hg is used to
luxury.
Pulling the beast INTO the postoGice,
old man Price asked what the postage
on hiu would be. Beebe didn't know.
He had never handled any wildcats be
fore Well, Price had. He had mailed
one to Mr. Arthur, and before his day
the boys had sent bear to Gen. Grant.
He wanted TO know what the tax would
be. Beebe opened a book and pretend
ed to read. Then he looked at the Wild
cat, and next at Price. At length he
stammered out something TO the effect
that it would probably be abOnt ten
stamps, Price bought the stamps
stuck them on the cats collar.
and turned him over to the postmaster,
with an injunction to be careful OF him.
That afternoon when the mAiicarrier
came along he refused to take the ami
nal. Beebe sWOre that he should, be
cause the postage had been paid. The
driver said he would lick Beebs first,
whereupon the postmaster, who was
man Of high temper, struck the driver
in the face. A fight enaued, and while
it was in progress the wildcat got mad
and ran in to the grocery, where he
crawled under a counter. When Beebe
and the mail-carrier had settled their
differences the former went after the cat,
but was soon warned by the animals
demeanor that intimacy with him was
not safe. BY this time the town was on
the ont side watching the fun.
The driver and Beebe tried various eZ-
periments in the hope Of getting the
beast out, but without success, until at
length they hit upon the plan of putting
a big leather mailbag near him with a
piece Of meat in it, the idea being that
he would dash into the bag for the meat
and they could shen close it quickly and
thus have hin securely done up for his
long journey. The plan worked to per
fection, and a few minutes later the crowd
In front had the pleasure Of seeing the
driver and Beebe emerge, carrying the
bag containing the compliments OF the
citizens of Guntown. To simplify mat
ters Beebe had attached to the bag a
card on which the msil-carrier had writ
ten: