davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1886-02-07

h., z 3 O, Railroad.
Leave Bsllairs ut SIS p. n. tor Woodsedd and
Summarized.
Leave Bellaire IT 2:So q n. for Summarized md
xanesytlls.
Arrive a Bsllaire, IoIoa m. and s:2o p 4.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1886-10-14
Burdette's Fun.

"What is that big iron thing full of
holesP ?" asked Laura. Locomotive
boiler" said Tom. Laura looked
thoughtful. After moments silence
she asked: "Why Co they boil loco
motives2" Tom looked amazed: "To
make 'em tendCr," he said slowly.
"Ah, Longlaw, up to your eyes in
work, ehP What are you doing? Re-
modelling your lecture for next sea-
son?" "Bless you, no; I've NJ time to
do anything with the lecture. f,u lust
remodeling the press notices"
"Law Without Lawyers" is the tile
of a new book. That's nothing strange.
Lemonade without lemons has been an
old thing ever since picnics were in
vented.
"Do you believe that animals go to
heaven, Mr.. Semitone?" "No, don't,
but believe that some birds go to the
other place." "Why?" Because q
canary bird in Chicago has learned to
whistle airs from 'Mikado.
There are some troubles chat even
religion fails to allay with comforting
ministry. When q man goes to church
on hot morning, wearing q collar a
size smaller than the neck band of his
shirt, it's no earthly use for the parson'
to talk about heaven to himA when he
feels that neck band break out of its
reservation in a new bulge as fast as
he tucks an old one under.
"If," said the school mistress, "six
masons can build stone wall one hum
dred feet long, five feet high, and two
feet thick, in six days, in how many days
would twelve men build itP" The
smart, bad boy at the foot of the class
scratched the floor with his toe q min
ute, and half wished he had studied
his lesson. Depends" he answered.
depends upon what?" asked the
teacher. "Are they Knights of La
bor2" asked the smart, bad boy.
"That makes no difference" replied
his teacher, "but we'll say yes"
"Then," said the smart, bad boy, tri-
umphantly, at would take them about
seventy-five years; they couldn't do q
lick of work until Martin Irons died"
The editor meets Lazibones on the
street. "What are you doing?" he
asks. "Loafng," says Lazibones, @it's
too hot to work, so I've just laid off for
the rest of the summer. Hain't done
lick of work in six weeks" Good"
says the editor. "Ill give you a stake.
Come down to the Office, there's good
fellow, and give us about thirty-five
hundred words on the Labor Prob
lem,' for Sunday morning, can't you?'
The weary one hesitates, but says if it
gets little cooler maybe he will.
Father" said Rollo, looking up
from his history, "who was Pliny the
| elder?" Rollo's father was too busy to
talk just then, and Rollo's mother sud-
denly remembered that il was time to
go to the kitchen and look at the
bread, but Rollo's Uncle George stood
his ground nobly, and said, ~Oh, he
couldn't tell just exactly who he was,
but he was big man in the Methodist
church, q presiding elder, he reck-
oned." And Rollo venerates his Uncle
George more and more every day, for
his learning.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1886-10-14

M. Il. CHURCH-Rev. c. NJ. Bigelow, Pastor.
Services at IL o'clock n IN. and 715 p. m. Sun
day school at 12 m. Prayer meeting every
Thursday evening at 71a o'clock. All are cor
dially invited 20 attend.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1886-10-14

A YOUNG married woman was very much
worried during the recent storm. Her hus-
band had Just bought COW and put it in
the barn. AS soon as it commenced to
thunder, the lady rushed wildly to the
kitchen and cried to her cook: "Run,
Mary, and shut that stable door. If that
COW hears that thunder it will turn her milk
aour
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1886-10-14

A KENTUCKY woman has nearly re-
formed her husband by persuading him to
use bottles of whisky as weights for the
clock. The oftener he drinks the slower
the clock goes, and the longer he has TO
wait for his meals
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1886-10-14
DECEMBER 3.
That Is the Day Set Apart for
the Execution of the Con-
victed Anarchists.
Judge Gary Asks Them for Rea-
sons Why They Should Not
Be Hanged,
And They Reply with Argument, De.
nunciation, Invectiye, and Tirade
Against Capital.

The motion to secure new trial for the con-
victed Chicago anarchists has failed, and Fri
day, the Sd of December been fixed as the
dav of exaeution
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1886-05-19
THE PROGRESSIVE FARMER qMAY519 1895

neighbors. A clear head and an
honest heart are worth more than
all the law of the lawyers. There
was one good thing said at the bar.
1t was from one Shakespeare, an En-
lish player, [ believe. No matter, it
is good enough almost to be in the
Bible. 1t is this: BE just, and fear
not 1t is our business to do justice
between the parties, not by any
quirks Of the law out of Coke or
Blackstone, books that I have never
read 0 never will, but by common
sense and common honesty, as be-
tween man and man. That is our
business, and the curse Of God will
be upon US if we neglect or evade,
or turn aside from it. And now, Mr..
Sheriff, take out the jury, and you,
Mr.. Foreman, do not keep us wait
ing with idle talk, of which there
has been too much already about
matters which have nothing to do
with the merits of the case. Give
us an honest verdict, of which, as
plain, common sense men, you need
not be ashamed."-Ben Perley Poor
IN Boston Budget. 81
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1886-05-19
JUSTICE RATHER THAN Law.

Mr.. Webster used sometimes to
read the conclusion of a charge by
Judge Dudley, a trader and a far
mer, a manuscript copy OF which he
had for many years in his desk. 1t
was a treat to hear him read it in
pure undefiled English, as it doubt
less came from Judge Dudley's lips:
you have heard gentlemen of the
jury, what has been said in this case
by the lawyers, the rascals! but, no,
| will not abuse. them. 1t is their
business to make a good cause for
their clients; they are paid for it,
and they have done in this case well
enough, but you and /, gentlemen,
have something else to consider,
They talk of law. Why, gentlemen,
it is not law that we want, but JUS
tice. They would govern us by the
common law of England. Trust me,
gentlemen, common sense is a much
safer guard for us; the common sense
OF Raymon, Epping, Exter, and the
other towns which have sent us here
to try this case between two of our
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1886-05-19
With Cotton a: Eigt! ..d a Half Cents, Poor
Crops and Bad Prices,
WHAT SHALL BE DONE
RALEIGH, n. c., Feb. l, 1885.

RALEIGH, n. c., Feb. 1, 1885.
more especially of those in the Eastern
Counties, is a serious one. With cotton
at 81 cents and everything else in the
same proportion, it is doubtful whether
our people can make cotton at all
thoughtful men all through the
South are considering earnestly this
question: WHAT SHALL BE DONE?
With prices of their products way down
and the prices OF all they buy not re-
duced in the same proportion, what
shall be done t O feed the family, buy
clothes and send the children to school
during this New Year? All this time
sensible men are cutting down every ex-
pense and resolving that they will make
more at home. Milk, meat, vegetables
must be made in larger quantities and
groceries saved corn, oats and grass
must be provided for the horses, COWS
and hogs. High-priced fertilizers and eve
ry extra thing are entirely out Of the
question. The wise nan will buy the
cheapest and best ingredients only and
make fertilizers at home this year.
At this time, THE NORTH CARROLL
Ma PHOSPHATE COMPANY Y, an ex-
clusively North Carolina Company, work
ing nothing but North Carolina material,
wants to inform the prudent men just
described how they can help themselves
and help a home enterprise by buying
LIME PHOSPHATE, the cheapest Phos-
phate ever sold in North Carolina. It is
to tn" interest of every farmer in North
Carolina to write to the NORTH CARO-
LIMA PHOSPHATE COMPANY at
Raleigh, n. c., and learn how to ave
money and make a good fertilizer hat
will make a good crop at a very low
price.
1-3ms.
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1886-05-19
SLEEPING-CAR V

On trains 80 and 81, Pullman Buffet
Sleeper between Atlanta and New York.
On trains 50 and So, Pullman Buffet
Sleeper between Washington and New
Orleans, Washington and Augusta. Pull
man Sleeper between Richmond and
Greensboro.
Through tickets on sale at principal
stations to all points.
For rates and information apply to any
agent of the company, or to
c.. w. CLEARS,
Asst. Genl. Pass. Agent.
E. B. THOMAS,
Genl. Manager.
RICHMOND. VA.
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1886-05-19
THINGS WORTH KNOWING.

Lemons were used by the Ro-
mans to keep moths from their gar
ments, and in the time of Pliney
they were considered an excellent
poison. $685..
DO not change from a dry to a
green diet too suddenly, or diarrhe
will be the result. Commence giving
only small quantities at first. A few
pinches of salt added to the soft food
is very beneficial.
Two oilings of harness, except
the collars, a year is enough; but the
collars should be oiled every two
weeks during the working season,
and the sweat and dirt be removed
each morning with a dull knife.
1t is about time that the atten-
ton of farmers and all rural people
was turned in the direction of de-
cided effort in behalf of protection
to insectivorous birds. They should
be encouraged in every practicable
way.
The oak and other trees are
gradually extending and covering
unoccupied grounds in the West.
Thousands OF acres are now covered
with young trees where they did
not grow forty years ago. There
are more acres of natural timber in
Illinois to-day than when the State
WAS first settled
Large quantities Of condensed
milk are now sold in this country,
and, strange to say, some of it is
imported from Switzerland. Could
not some of the farmers who are
situated at quite a distance from
market, and who wish to dispose of
their dairies, establish factories for
condensing their milk, and thus
establish a home market?
Selling the best fowls and breed
ing those that are left, as many do,
is like planting seed peas or beans
from the vines that have supplied
the table until they are no longer
worth picking. The poultry raiser,
as the stock breeder, should breed
from the finest specimens, those
that will give him the most profit
for the outlay.
1t is now almost six years
since the tenth census was taken,
and yet much of it is yet unpub-
Iished. One of the most important
reports, that Of J. r. Dodge, of the
Agricultural Department, on fruits
and orchards, sheep-husbandry and
hop growing. is lying imprinted and
likely to remain so.
-Lowness in price is not always
an indication of cheapness. In MAX
ing purchases buy that which is
cheapest for the price asked. A
$500 horse is probably cheaper at
that price than a $40 n at that
figure. SO, too, a COW, a bull, a boar
or a sheep may be dear at a low
price and cheap at a high one. Low
price is not always synonymous with
cheapness.
Regularity in feeding and milk
ing is of great Importance in a milk
The easy going farmer who
milks early in the morning and late
at night in Summer because the
days are long, and uce rersa in Win
ter because they re short, will not
be a success at the business we
think. Twelve hours between milk
ing is more likely to promote a uni
form yield, and if the feeding is also
at regular and stated periods, the
will more than compensate
for any Inconvenience that may
arise from an endeavorsto carry out
the practice. Variety of food is also
very important, and stock of all
kinds should be given the benefit of
frequent changes of food.
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1886-05-19
flashes Of fun.

Little Jack: My mammals new
fan is hand-painted.' Little Dick
pooh! Who cares? Our whole
fence is"
Two farmers had a dispute
about the boundary lines of their
farms. Their disputes are now set
tied, and so r the lawyers-on
their farms.
-"Pay me that five dollars you
owe me, Mr.. Malrooney," said a vii
lage attorney. "For what 2" "For
the opinion you had of me-" "Faith
| never had any opinion of you in
all my life"
Papa, why don't they give the
telegraph wires a dose Of gin?"
why my child?" Because the
papers say they are out of order,
and mamma always takes gin when
she gets out of order"
First small boy-"Say, Johnnie,
where are you in Sunday school?"
Second small boy-"Oh, we're in
the middle of original sin" First
small boy-"That amt much; we're
past redemption"
-"How | do like to look through
a telescope" exclaimed a young
lady. Through a t~elescope!"
sneered Il sour-tempered old aunt.
Through a telescope. Humph!
Give me a keyhole."
My text" said the preacher,
"may be found at Genesis NNXvii. g.:
How old art thou?" And a dozen
or so maiden ladies, not n of them
under thirty promptly responded:
"Only twenty"
Homeopathic doctor: "Smell
that-now you're cured" Patient:
doctor, how much do | owe you?"
Doctor: "Twenty dollars" Patient
takes out a $40 bill and says: "Smell
that-now you're paid"
-"Well, Joe, they say you are 90
ing to be married?" Yes" Failed
in business last week didn't you?"
Eyes" Lost everything?" YES"
"shouId think it would be a rather
inoppOrtune time to get married"
Must support myself some way"
PA" said a Devonshire boy,
"what is punctuation?" Its the
art of putting stops, my child"
Then | wish you would go down
in the cellar and punctuate the spig-
got of the cider barrel, as the cider
is running all over the floor"
Johnny Gust after Sunday
schooD; "Say, Jack, what is a sock
dolager?" Why, don't you know?
It's what they sing in church when
they get ready to go home. The
minister gets up and says: Let us
now sing the sockdolager.'"
-"Arrah, Pat, and why did I
marry you? For its meself that's
had to maintain We ever since the
blessed day hat | came home to
yer house," "Swate Jewell re-
piled Pat, land its meself that hopes
| may live to see the day when
ye're a widow, waping over the
cowld sod that covers me. Then I'll
see how you get along without me,
honey!"
Rev. DIR. Hanson, of Chicago,
recently lectured at Chatauqua, his
subject being "Fools.' Rev. DIR.
Vincent, who is something OF a wag,
introduced him as follows: W are
now to have lecture on fools, by one
Hong pause and loud laughter of
the wisest men in the country"
The lecturer advanced to the desk
and responded as follows: II am
not half so big a fool as DR.. Vincent
-[long pause and loud laughter
would have you suppose"
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1886-05-19
RICHMOND And DANVILLE RAILROAD CO

PIEDMONT AIRLINE ROUTE.
Condensed Schedule In effect May2, $50.
Trains Run by 75o Meridian Time.
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1886-05-19

SOUTHERN CULTIVATOR
AND DIXIE FARMER.
YEAR.

TIE Great Farm, Industrial and S7ocH
Periodical Of the South.
It embraces in it's constituency the in
telligent, progressive and substantially
successful farmers of this section, and as
an advertising medium for the Mer-
chant, Manufacturer, Stock Raiser and
Professional Man, is ABSOLUTELY UNE-
QUALLED.
Space ~judicially employed in its col
umns is always remunerative.
Advertisements, per line, 30
Subscription, per annum, $l.5O
Address.
P. Q. Drawer s. ATLANTA, GA.
Freie Presse fuÌˆr Texas. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1865-1945, 1886-05-24

100 do. rs $500
2,279 I'm @etrase bon $522,5o0
EE- anfrasen fur gsenten, fosie Rateu
fir Clubs fSnnen rur in Der Office tn Rem
Orleans geraa9t tuerDen.
@ese ndberer ~sustunft f@reibe man beutIid
BITE aanae abrefe.
Gan idtde @elb bur1 Wcfdi 3 o.
ten, GrpreB Mrnep Srber, Metp Ocrl
Wediel auf Wem Srleans.
8riefe nit gurrensp unber6nbert per erpreb
gBir aablen Gyprebtoifen.
W. ". Daupbtn.
Nep DrIeans, Ga.
@am ab~refire resiitrtte 8riefe unb tek
9.O. Mcneb Orbres dAe auf hits leD Orleans
National 8aut, Aetp Drleaps, Ca
@bmarb M osre, M8ent,
22l Aeeauia StraFe, Sau GntsniD, GeraS
Freie Presse fuÌˆr Texas. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1865-1945, 1886-05-24
llnabertrefftde gIn3ieHung
ueber cine babe Miiicn bsrlocf.
Qpuiiiana @tate Qotterp So.

DiefeS Snfitnt ipurbe TN Sotre 1858 fit
grtiebunss. nnb BobItbdtisteits . 8nede bon
6er StaatslesisIatur fir ben 8eitroum bon
finfuno3wanais Sabren seiesli9 incorpprtrt
nit einem RapttaI bon $1,000, 200, ID peI@era
ie ieitber einen IeierbefOnb bon $66O,0o0 6in.
5ugefi9t bat. Onrd Elm iberf4penaIihes
@otum tumrben TIRE Re6te elm SbeiI Der geaen.
~pdrtisen Staatsconfitution, ansenommen an,
2. December 1879.
Sbre groBen 8iebnnsen bon ein3eI.
men Nummern fuben mcnatli1 hatt.
MieinalS ipirD cine ooiebuns berf9oben. Man
leie na@folsenben @Ian.
@aBerrrbentlt& eterteljdbrliHe 8ie>
bmnS
in Der Gcabeulh Of Wnfc, Mep Srleuns.
Dienfag ben is. SUM 1886.
100000 Sidets au $40 isbes.
9albe S.. 6tnftel So. 3ehntel 81.
ga ~
Freie Presse fuÌˆr Texas. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1865-1945, 1886-05-24
Steam Washer,

bic einsise praIti1de @afduafdiae, @ttpa 100
in Gtabf unb rlmaeaenb i'm @ebrau9 Biaig
unb bauerbaft. Die d@ten nitr 3u bdbsn BET
Soeob Weber, Agent.
19,1lw3W sl2, acrb GIoresRrots.
Salt Lake evening Democrat. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1885-1887, 1886-03-29
FRED DOUGLASS SUCCESSOR.

A special dispatch from Washington to
the Chicago Herald says the President
has declined absolutely to withdraw the
nomination of James G. Matthews. the
colored lawyer of Albany, for Recorder
OF Deeds for the District of Columbia.
This nomination has given rise to con-
siderable comment by politicians of both
parties, and the President has been
sharply criticised by some of them, not
only for nominating colored man to a
lucrative and important position in the
national capital, but more particularly for
going outside of Washington to select
Mr.. Douglass successor.
Matthews is graduate OF the Albany
IN. W Law School, was regularly adj
mitted to the bar in 1870, and subse-
quently to the bar of the United States
courts. He has been successful in the
practice of his profession, and has
labored zealously and effectively for the
Democratic cause in State and national
campaigns since 1872.
From the fact that the President de-
clines to withdraw the nomination, it is
evident that he has every confidence in the
mans ability to well and truly perform
the duties of the Office; and it is also quite I
Salt Lake evening Democrat. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1885-1887, 1886-03-29
WOMAN SUFFRAGE IN UTAH

Mrs. Clemence S. Lozier, Chairman OF
the New York State Committee of the
Woman Suffrage party, is paying her
respects to Senator Edmunds because of
the latter's proposal to disfranchise the
women of Utah, Mormon and Gentle
alike, until such time as the plural mar
rlage question shall have been satisfac-
torily disposed OF. Mrs Lozier thinks
that none but horribly selfish and very
mean man would be guilty of making
such proposition, and when Mr. Ed
munds dropped her line to remark. that
ii you and your associates understood
the state of things in Utah, am sure you
would support instead of oppose the pro-
vision to relieve the women of Utah from
the degradation of voting as their Mormon
masters require" the lady's dander was
aroused to such pitch at the Senator's
'impertinence" that she dropped all ar
gument in the premises and commenced
to scream and fight, and this is the vigor-
dress down the horrid Vermont man with
her little broomstick: "Your. action
shows that your constituents will do
very wisely to remove you from the Sem
atorial seat wherein you have shown
yourself aristocratic, tyrannical and re-
dictionary. Your course in this matter
has destroyed your prospects for the
Presidency. Your party's leaders will |
know that you cannot carry New York,
and that, though disfranchised, the wo-
manhood of America would manage to
turn other States against you"
Senator Edmunds must have been
somewhat astonished at this evidence of
storm in the teapot circle Of Woman
Suffragists, but as the matter now stands
it looks as though this attempt to shoe
him away from interference in Utah
affairs comes a little too late to do any
good
Salt Lake evening Democrat. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1885-1887, 1886-03-29
ENDORSING THE WOODBURY. BILL

The nom Mormons of Idaho are alive to
the necessities of the hour, as evidenced
by the calls which appear in the journals
of that Territory for mass conventions In
several towns ''for the purpose of endors-
ing the anti-Mormon bill introduced in
Congress by Representative Woodburn,
of Nevada, and also to petition Congress
for the passage of said BILL"
OF all the measures yet introduced in
Congress for the remedy of Mormon
evils, the Woodburn bill stands first and
foremost in point of merit and efficacy,
and it is to be regretted that the Gentiles
of Utah should neglect to give it the same
earnest and public endorsement that the
Mormons of Idaho are prepared to
give it. The belief is general among the
members of the bar of this city, that this
bill would prove an almost complete pam
acea for all the ills of a Mormon nature
which the Territories have suffered from,
and as such it ought to have
the heartiest approval of every freeman in
the land. Its provisions are such that,
should it become law, the State would
forever be freed from the blighting influ-
enee and control of the despotic Church
and the eradication OF
polvgamy would follow as a matter of
course.
The Gentiles OF Utah should follow the
of their brethren in Idaho and
give such public endorsement to the
Woodburn bill as would make it clear
that they fully appreciate the great
wrongs which its provisions are designed
% redress, and by this means strengthen
,he hands of those who are earnestly
to secure its passage through
Congress.
Salt Lake evening Democrat. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1885-1887, 1886-03-29
A BOMB.SHELL OF A PRAYER.
The Chaplain of the House Calls the
Lords Attention to Our
Rich Men.

WASHINGTON, March 27.-The chap
lain's opening prayer this morning was
as follows: "Give ear, O, God of Jacob,
and awaken us to see the danger which
threatens the civilized world-a revolu
ton more tremendous than any of which
history tells-in which the scenes of the
reign of terror may be enacted In every
capital of Europe and America. For
long while the few have mastered the
many, because they understood the open
secret-that men were but tools to those
that can use them; but now the many
have learned the secret of organization,
drill and dynamite. Arouse the rich of
the world to understand that the time has
come for the grinding. selfish monopoly to
cease, and that corporations may get
souls in them, with justice, honor, con.
science and human kindness. Teach the
rich men OF this country that their great
fortunes are but lent them by Thee for
other purposes than to build and deco
rate palaces; to found private collections
of art; to stock wine cellars; to keep rae
ing studs and yachts, and find better
company than hostlers, grooms and jock
eys, pool sellers and bookmakers.
Teach them, Oh God, that is it Thee who
has given them power to get these for
tunes, and that it to prove them and to
know what is in their hearts and whether
they will keep Thy commandments or no,
and that those commandments are,
Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with
all thy heart, and neighbor as thyself.
That if the rich men of our land keep
these commandments the poor will fol-
low their example, and we, at least, will |
be saved from the days of tribulation |
that are fast coming on all the world. |
Help us, o, God, and save u.s.
Mr.. Grosvenor, of Ohio, asked unani-
nous consent that the prayer be printed
in the Record.
Mr.. James, of New York, objected, re-
soto Uoce, to gentleman who
asked him to withdraw his objection,
that it was because the prayer was an in
cendiary speech.