Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-07-22

u modestly avail myself, :" is the
way Bro. Turner'S nom de plume be
gins. To practice that. little virtue
would have saved his friends the NOR
LITIGATION and himself the disgrace of
his self-parade before the public in his
uncalled for self-puff, styling himself
"a man." We apologize for introduc-
ing personalities in discussing princi-
pies; but to fan his fame little more
| will glorify him in his own eyes,
and to please prophet is better than
to stir his holy ire. And it is so fun
ny to see him struttlng, you know,
and believing it barely possible that
his heart may be soft as his head,
there will be but little danger but that
his highness will assist us in his right
eous prayers to escape the orthodox
hell he SO deeply deplores. And be
coming modest, assures us of a future
protection of another silly parade of
self, and stimulates hope that his
Rev. may keep the bounds of decency
in his divine calling. We hope that
the good work will 60 another step
higher in moral reform, until honesty
mixes with his modesty, SO as to ena-
BILE him to practice what he breaches,
and in getting free prescription from
a Dr. on account of his holy calling,
to not insult the NJ. D. by telling him
that lie does not believe in NJ. DIS. MOI
medicine, and still take the medicine
that he does not believe in, from a
man that he does not believe in, fol.
lowing profession that he does not
believe in, in order to show his faith
by his works, as Saint James says.
His holiness then signs an application
for whisky that he does not believe
in, with tasteless drug in it that he
did not believe in, bismuth, and tells
his people that it spoiled the good
taste of the whisky, when he did not
believe it so that topper would not
enjoy it when he did not believe it
made believe that topper could tell il
from whisky straight, when he did no,
believe a word of it.
He makes of himself q splendid
specimen of total depravity, which he
does believe in. 1t is cardinal point
in his creed: SIS wholesome doc
trine and very full of comfort" to a
Methodist preacher. Paul says:
'Their throat is an open sepulchre
with their tongues they have used de.
ceit; the poison of asps, serpents, is
under their lips; whose mouth is full
of cursing and bitterness; their feet
are swift to shed blood, etc." Or as
Paul further says: "Now then it is no
more that do it, but the sin that
dwelleth in me-"
Being reared preachers son, and
from infancy taught these beautiful
lessons of total depravity, and to flop
his little wings and crow to the edifi-
cation of the brethring and sistering,
he is not much at fault, considering
his raising, if little of his totality
still swells in his manly" little giz-
zard; and as a dyspeptic he is not to
blame, given to visions, as dyspeptics
generally are. For supposing that
prohibition is a relative of the Chica
go riots and dynamite bombs, so he
in frenzy fires off at them and that
other thing, too indecent to name, in
} which the clergy are little apt, con
nected with his private reverie in his
midnight prayers. His visions chime
these along with Kansas prohibition
all one to him, if he does not know
the difference, which he appears u
not. We will not attempt the useles.
task to open his eyes, as he feels very
confident that he is little sman," 81
we will agree with him when he blum
ders on the truth, and let his nonsens,
alone. He says: 'The amount of al
: cohol and whisky used in compound
ing medicine in the U. s. is an infini
' tesmal part of the alcohol and whisky
consumed as beverage" That i.
5 just where he gets in the truth by .
, blunder. To drink it as beverage
t is just what prohibition forbids, ant
; what the law was made to prevent