News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-12-09
THE LIME-KILN CLUB.
GRO. GARDNER TALKS ABOUT poll
It'll 5 AND CANDIDATES.
Our Party Man Is Always RighT-The
Other Fellow is Always Wrong.
from the Detroit Free Press I

'Up my way" began Brother Gard
| ner, as the lamps were turned up, 'libs
man whom hev knowed fur dozen
| Vars as an honest. upright, haTd-work-
| ing citizen. He am kind to his wife,
| tender wild his children, an he would
| sell his boots to pay debt. Oar has
bin no time in de last six or seben vars
| dat | wouldn't hey bin glad 0 lend him
| anything | had, or to git up at midnight
to do him favor. De odder day he was
| pu up as a candydate fur some small
office. If it had bin on my ticket it
| would hev bin all right, but it was on
de opposishun. As a consequence | hev
bin goin' aroun' calm him liar an
horse-thief, an warnin' my friends dat
If he am 'lected dis kentry am gwine
straight to ruin at once. | wouldn't
lend him my ak or shovel to save his
neck, an hev my suspishuns dat he
| beats his wife an starvns his children.
SIN my feelins l am exactly like de
rest of you. De candydates on my
ticket are all right; de candydates on
de odder am all wrong. Seriously, my
>frens, what fules we make of ourselves
TpollYticks We work 'longslde of a
man fur a var naybur wild his family
stand ready to fight fur him if neces-
sary, but all of sudden it comes out
dat he am put up fur Office. He am put
up, probably, fur de very merits we
hev diskivered an praised, but dat set
ties us. We am ready to abuse him
high an low, an to stoop to de basest
trickery an dishonesty-to, defeat him
Sample cases kin be seen all around
us to-day. A man may differ wild us
on poetry, religun, an all else but
pollyticks. De very mint he can't go
our candydates his goose am cooked.
We say to ourselves when de campaign
opens: Let us hope dat boat parties
will bring out DER very best men.
What we want am honesty an, respecta-
bility in official posishuns.' Good men
are hunted out an prevailed upon to
come to the front, and den one party
squars off to frow mud at one set, an de
odder party squars off TO beslime de cd
der set. Men who hev lived fifty years
of honest, upright lives am dragged frew
de mud by loafers only six months out
of Stalt Prison, an we stand ready to
punch de head of our best friend in case
he can't agree wild us. Am it any won
der dat American politics am cess pool
an dat Americans elected to represent
counties, districts, States and de guv'-
ment am looked upon wild suspishun by
de world at large.
Il want to say to each an ebery one
of you dat de bigotry of polyticks am de
disgrace of de present generashun. A
party must hev monumental cheek to
argv dat it includes all de honest IL en- in
its ranks A man must be leetle less
dan fool who reasons dat his way of
thinkin' must guide all his friends! An
yit, dat am de prevailin' idea of to-day,
an good men am being slandered an
/ simply bekase dey differ wild us on we'd
| der de gov'ment should pull on its right
or It's left butte first
81 has heard some of dis talk around
dis hall. l don't want to h'ar any mo- :
Of it. Work fur whom you please an
vote fur whom you will, but doan't be
idiot enough to ascribe to one all de
varchews an to charge the odder wild all
de crimes on airth. We am all heah
wild de same interests at heart-all luv-
in our kentry an all anxyus to put her
ahead. If we differ in our theory of
how it should be done it am bekase no
two men kin agree on de best way to
git bar'l O. cider down cellar"
OUT OF ORDER.
The Rev. Penstock sent to the Secre-
tary's desk the following preamble and
resolution:
"Whereas, Sartin newspapers am in de
habit of maxim a distinction in color
when q man am arrested, as: John Doe,
a colored man, was arrested last night
for'-and so forth, and
"Whereas, Dis distinction am a relic
Of bsrbarianism an unworthy of de
aige, now darfore,
'ResoLUed, Dat dis club protest agin
s1ch distinction an indulges In de hopes
lat it will soon be abandoned"
At the Presidents request it was read
a second time, and then he arose and
said:
''Brudder Penstock, shall hev to de-
clar' de resolushun outer order"
eur what reason, sah2"
EUR de reason dat no vital ishue am
ut stake, an bekase your pint am not
well tooken. De fack of distinction of
color am pint in our favor. 50 many
pussons am bein' arrested an held up in
papers dat if de term 'culPd' was not
used row an den de hull caboodle would
be supposed to belong to our race"
II shall appeal from de decishun of
de char" firmly replied Penstock.
every well. De Sekretary will call
de roll on de appeal"
This was one, and there were only
three votes to sustain it A vote was
then taken on the resolution, and it re-
ceived only two votes. Brother Pen
stock sat down very hard, and during
he rest of the meeting employed his
lime in reading patent medicine clrcu-
iar