The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1886-04-29
THE MERRY SIDEI

"The Cincinnati Senatorial Frauds must go!
But when?
Democratic philosophy-"Never be certain of
a Postoffice until you get it,"
-
The prospector for oil generally knows where
the oil is-until he gets there.
The Cincinnati ball-cub is improving on its
rec ord-getting beaten oftener than ever.
& -
Seasons have changed again, and the Bohe-
mian oats liar must give way to the circus agent
To II. B. Payne: Get ready! We're coming
Look out! What-arent you going to resign
Times are getting almost hard enough for the
demagogue to take the road and reap his har-
vest.
Brains may earn wealth-but the attempt
wealth to purchase brains has always proven a
dismal failure.
"The Harness-m akers' Union of Cincinnati
has joined the eight-hour movement" A sttug'
against time.
A Circleville broom-maker suicided because
times were ard. He had spent all his money
for whisky.
Out in Missouri they have physician arrested
for killing girl. Why, what would they ex-
pect of him?
Cincinnati is to have a Morgue. This proves
that the fame of Cincinnati beer is increasing
the business of the city.
1t is generally conceded that the iron fronts
and dry-goods boxes are softer now than at any
other time of the year.
l, dad r;yey
will soon be past-buying his wife new spring
hat, and meeting the Assessor.
John L. Sullivan visited the Joliet Peniten-
tiary last week, and is said to have enjoyed
himself splendidly-feelingq quite at home.
The laws relating to prize-Hghts need i'm
provement. They should require that all con-
tests should be with iron knuckles.
What can exceed the misery of the croaker
who sat disconsolately under a blooming fruit
tree and watched for the Easter Storm ?"
The newspapers have fixed Clcveland's we'd
ding with Miss Folsom to take place in June
So, Mr.. President, you might as well get ready.
-
We would not advise school childr en- to strike.
The teachers might get to striking, when the
fun for the boy at the other end of the stick
would cease.
-
The Missionaries must get after Krupp. He
has just finished gun which throws shell
weighing seventy hundred and eighty-four
pounds.
Portsmouth, having purchased and intro
duced the English sparrows, now knows how
tne 1eilow 1eit VINO strucK norneIs nest Win
a club.
Str;,-os 49,. o,o;,,o, a,orn,i,,oln rrev.lent-
e1yan the an,aterr newsnoner writer strikes
against "capital," frequently In his compost
uons.
Whom pon. porna accommodated tbe usyeen.
inc, Of tho Angaan stab,es ,, he nrobab,v meant
1vino around
-
The political sensation writer now has to put
in the time ralxing weeds In the political field.
meanness
ine ca eS.,on iooi' "sn ~ 81, :
Lear " .ieao' lnus' nave soihie zeal ins on ',-o
"n .,,a 80. 49, 800 ~ ~ '
o,u,o VI, -.,,, o,,.o ont 4to ,vhis,,,,
- ~ -, =, -, 49,, -, oo 49,, =
Iae,i~,.. no.a+;o Stoto rni,ho,+
--ls;~,-oI -. - 80
So
d.nobte,s ono ra,, ouav with his coacbman.
opd +ba Chr ,yoS hitten by a mad doc Tho
1.++a is a. Loot h,,r+ of III q two
Cincinnati has a COW with two heads. The
She could go about the streets looking in two
directions at the same time, for gates to hook
open.
,,,,,aou =.
c,.S1 - =. -, Ill a. 49, ,,o,+ e. a. .
ola sololefs. SAL III genIe"en' IL tneies any
tnihs q soioier enjoys II 10 sooo ies i'i''ion
Inc manager OF the new Jersey Fehlleneiary
got In among the female conV1cts ana 1ell oy
the waysloe. In the trlal every Deinocra'ic III
~.*
c,;o;,+; ,o,, ,-oa,,or, o,dors.d Jrdoe
1,itoro1d,, ,,Iao oas5ns+ so,1ino Honor tn mi
nors Now 1et them unit selling to drunken
narentv ond thew will do sometbfno practically
An amateur naturalist declares that the lands
along creeks are called "bottom" lands because
so many people slt upon them Wnlle nsnlnS.
Those who have tried it will understand what
ColumDus correspondents colhPiains 'ha
tne Legislators speno 100 huch 'iine soine
nome ana coming oacK. wrong young man
feople ooh care no" ihuon Lesista'uie soea
noine-i' 'ne ooAiins '''oA 'l"' gus Gill;
A writer IN ooluhious mas olSooVeieu pio'
on tne part Vi Vhe DeinoeIAoy " oNei'u VI
state government. WISH lne democracy
would oVerturn tha1 writer. hes e'loeh'ly
upside oo"n'
eats glass-deyouringw with great satisfaction old
tumbIers. lamp chjmneys, and the like He's 9
prize for any woman a mighty handy creature
to have around in the spring-about house
cleaning time