Sierra County advocate. [volume] (Kingston, N.M.) 1884-1960, 1886-09-18
FAMILY CRESTS.
Valuable Information Concerning These
Useful and Ornamental Articles.

| Useful and Ornamental Articles,
Through the kindness of the author,
aud the L. 5. mail, | have to-day re-
ceiyed, after paying sixteen cents due
for postage, the advance sheets of a
valuable work entitled, How to select
a coat of arms, or Every man his own
pathologician," by Prof. Gidcor Good
kind, PHI, d.. Ii. d., of London,
Ont. A careful perusal of the intro
ductory chapters of this highly inter-
esting book leads me to the conclusion
that no well regulated family can
afford TO keep house without at least
one copy in the pantry, containing rs
it does in addition to the usual index
thirteen different receipts for curing
bad breath. Some people, it is true
have dragged out miserable existence
with nothing approaching coat of
arms nearer than wood saw rampant
on an old pork barrel.
In the preface to his work the profes-
sor calls attention to the many adyan-
| tages accruing to the proud poSsessor
of family crest and the dcsirability Of
all people who have any pretentions to
aristocracy to be the owner of at least
one coat of arms, even if they can
trace their ancestor further back than
| the war. A typewriter circular en-
closed states that Prof. Goodkind, upon
receipt of any mans full name, and a
| live-dollar bill, not necessarily for pub
lication, etc. will select and forward
postpaid. handsome design for an
appropriate and durable coat-of-arms,
fully warranted aud copyrighted ac
cOrding to law. The price is certain
ly reasonable and within reach
all. Some of the illustrations ac-
companying the work are worthy of
more than mere passing notice, typ
flying as they do in the wild and un-
tutored West The first represents a
portly man, cOuchdtH, under n hOr Sc
trough, on field of red, with gulls
running traversely across the horizon
against which 4 spikcd-tal hog stands
out in bold relief, and bearing this in
scription: "Rate hoe or di. " This was
originally intended for wealthy Chi
cago pork packer, who went short on
a rising market to redeem it. On ac-
count of it being secondhand article,
the professor has marked it down to
four dollars and seycnty-nine cents,
with thirty per cent. off for cash. Here
is splendid opportunity for some
young couple, who have got
married on forty-tive dollars per
month and slight hopes of a raise, to
get a first-class coat-of-arms at little
over half price, satisfaction guaranteed
or money refunded.
L., IL h, 10
in the house. If properly constructed
it makes an excellent butter pat and
can be used with equal success in
molding the succulent fish ball of
commerce, or when heated to the
right temperature will do to brand the
brindlc cow on the rump, thus atlording
a reader means of Identification when
the Short Line, Limited, knocks
her outside of the right of way.
Another striking design represents
the figure of man rampant, eX-
ccuted in bas-relief under a Tamarac
tree. To the left are shown several
men on horseback, They are vigilantcs
and have Just executed the man in bas-
relief and good faith. To the right APP
pears on field of green, n number of
DdiS running PEI tlHchulCuldi ~ anu oth-
erwise across n stone window frame.
This was where the man was located
previous to the little misunderstanding
he has just had with the vigilantes.
The design is handsomely finished, and
as a work of art it would be hard to
equal. but for obvious reasons is not
destined to become popular
Space forbids mention of the rest of
the illustrations, suffice to say they all !
the high standard of the two
! have attempted in my feeble way to
describe. hope the professor will
kindly remember to send me the re-
mainder of the book as it comes out, as
the illustrations properly fastened to-
gether and riyeted to the window side |
of my hennery, afford pleasure for the
hens and profit for myself.
Personally family crest has no
charms for me, and should consider a
misfit coat-of-arms of no more value |
than the paltry sum it would realize if
sold for old Junk. As design for my |
tombstone favor one showing bro
ken backed humorist in his shirt |
sleeves. with the inscriptions: "Hic
Jacket ia Hoc"-the meaning of which |
would be obvious to all.-Pcck'S Sun.
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