The Irish standard., 1886-09-18
TELEPHONE INSPECTION. IT
Experience of Tennessee Judge Who
Wished to Be Accommodating.
Nashville fTenn.) Union.1

4 3 4 ..t
Judge F is a very quiet, easy-goin9
man when every thing runs smoothly, but
let him once get ratified and the neighbor~
hood can not pacify him. He will snarl at
his best friend when annoyed, and the
man who plays a practical Joke on him
had better emigrate Yesterday. as the
clock struck one, he was seated in his Of
| fce, very much worried over a chancery
case in which he is counsel, and bis desk
was fairly Uttered with papers, while he
was hurrying through with q certain part
of his work before dinner hour. Sudden
" the telephone bell rang a gentle SUM
mons just as though the girl in the central
office knew the judge was busy and hated
to disturb him, but was, nevertheless. COM
PEELED to, in order to satisfy the individual
at the other end Of the wire. The judge
rose hurriedly, jsrked the receiver from
| the hook, and yelled 'HelloE'
a silvery voice-a girlish won't-you-
ob!ige-me accent-betrayed that one of tie
fair sex was the caller. The judge toned
down and inquired: :tWen!"
"Is that Judge F'sn' said the sweet
toned voice.
Yes" was waited back.
sob! am SO glad. This is Miss NJ,
and l have been given charge of all COM
plants on the line Before making out
our new list wish to learn how your in-
strument works"
"Just like g CHARM" replied the gallant
judge. II have no fault to find either with
the instrument or service'
"Thank you,' was the sweet rejoiudeg,
':but you know how the managers would
appreciate few words of conlmendation
from you, SO, if you are not too busy.
would it be asking TOO much if you would
devote fifteen minutes toward d thorough
test OF your instrumeut:''
When there is a lady in the case ths
Judge is never in &. hurry, aud in his bland
est tones he announced himself at the
young 1ady's bidding.
Another vote OF thanks came over the
wire, and the soft voice inquired if he
. could place his ear about ten inches higher
than the transmitter iii order to test the
power Of bearing distinctly.
Unfortunately. the jui ge is large in cir
cun1ference, but not far from the ground,
and ho could not reach his arm above the
eai'-trumpet rack. much less place his head
up there.
be overcome by trihes and an idea struck
him. He determined to oblige the tele-
phone girl and he proceeded to inform her
to hold the telephone just minute and he
would be ready.
Again the bewi5ching voice uttered
thanks, and the judge put his plan into
operation. The telephone was alongside
the office window; about halfway up the
casing was 81 stout nail; a revolving booE-
case stood on the door. It was quickly
rolled over toward the window; the Judge
mounted it, grasped the nail On the win
dow-casing with one hand. tine trumpet
with the other and sang out: "All ready"
There was no response, and the judge
nearly twisted his neck out of joint as he
leaned down and repeated the words
through the transmitter.
The sweet voice answered in q low tone
and the Judge strained his ears i'll 1isten-
ing. ':Now, judge" came the message
'1isten attentiveiy and repeat the follow
ing words back TO uia, SO that may know
you hear them distinctly: What part of
speech is the word Observation-Disclosures
ducialty?''
It was too much, even for the judge On
the tenth syllable he squirmed; the naii
broEe; he made q grab for the telephone
box; Che bookcase revolved, and the ront-
ers in the story below thought the roof had
fallen in. When several OF them ca1no
running into the room the judge was lying
in the middle Of the floor, the law bccks
from the ease between bis knees while in
his hand he hugged the fatal eartrumpet,
which he had clung to in his fall, and the
cord Of which had been snapped in twain.
The matter was given into the hands Of
n detective, who last night reported to the
judge that the telephone company em-
ployed nc inspectors or testers of instru~
'uenus, and further, that the call came
from private residence whore the Judges
wife was spending the day. An air OF unn
usual GOODNESS permeates She Judges home
now, and the telephone company has lost