davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31

The maine Law" is still supposed to
be in force in Maine, yet of 1888 arrests
reported for last year by the city marshal
of Portland, Il. 800 were for crimes direct
" resulting from liquor"
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31

Willie Bradford, five years old, strayed
away from his home in the Cherokee Ma
ton the other day, and the next day
what the wolves had left of the poor
little fellow was found in mountain
olpp
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31

When an aesthetic though fresh young
journalist in Connecticut was married til,
other day his paper came out tinted will
rpsn
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31

In Michigan there is a new factory for
Il new pnrpose-to make a substitute for
whalebone out of the quils of geese and
turkeys.
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31

Dakota farmers are making plans to
grow flax this summer 1t is said that q
ton of flax straw is worth more to burn
than a ton of soft Goals
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31

The scarcity of able seamen along the
sound is such that captains now offer $2S
month, while the ruling rate heretofore
has been only SIS.
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31

Your system is now more susceptible
to the benefits of reliable medicine than
at any other season. Take Hoods Sar>
saparilla.
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31

A worlds fair in 1892 in the capital, to
commemorate the fourth centennial of
Americas discoveries just now agitating
the Washingtonians.
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31

Bleeding Kansas may bleed again.
There is movement to cut the state in
two so that state may be made out of
the western end.
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31

Springfield, Mass, proposes to turn
one of its efrete roller skating Kinks into
an armory.
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31

A German reminds the world that the
initials OF the Grand Old Man" spell W
f G, the German word for way, path,
road"
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31

Stone quarries on the estate of Mr.. Par
nell have been opened, and materials is
being taken from them for paving streets
in Dublin.
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31

The Horsford Almanac and Cook Book
mailed free on application. 80 the Runs
ford Chemical Works, Providence, r. |.
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31
/ have used Ely's Cream Balm for dry

catarrh Ito which eastern persons are
subject who come to live here) 1t has
proved a cure.--B. F. M. Weeks, Denver,
Colo.
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31
FIVE THOUSAND LADIES y,

II Il our Fancy Work. no INasshg; Ia hum
bug; easily learned and nee Five 10 Zen dollars
per week at this season; 81 fig employment all
the year round. Apply al c. tor particulars 10
KENsiNGToN PLAcQEE AN PAyEL AIT Co,
lknickeI booker BHiidingD = fremont 81 BIOS
ton, Mass y. q, Box = a0S
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31

NOTICE TO LADIES Private Home
Vevery attention during o lnemcnt. nv pracJi'
ing ply sician. address p Y-IcIAN.' -, West
Monroe St, thicago-
The Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1885-1886, 1886-03-31

An American church for Christian wor
shippers of all denominations is TO be built
at Nice.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21
Judge Davis and the Lawyers.

A railroad had been surveyed
through Vermillion county, ILL.,, some
time before and had taken deed for
an innocent old chaps farm, giving
him in payment for it lot of stock
which was represented to be of par
value. The farmer afterwards found
that the stock was almost, if not quite,
valueless, and brought suit in the
Federal Court TO have the deed set
aside and his farm returned to him.
The case CAM up before Judge Davis.
The railroad company had two or
three of the shrewdest attorneys to be
had, while the plaintiff was represent
ed by green country lawyer. 1t was
evident from the start that the defen-
dant's lawyers would outgeneral the
countryman at every turn, and so
they did until the evidence was all in
and the case submitted for dicision.
Gentlemen" said Judge Davis, 81
am familiar with the laws governing
this case and know of no law to pre-
vent a railroad company from stealing
a mans farm"
The agent Of the defendant-a man
named Griggs-whispered to one of
his attorneys that it was all right.
The attorneys looked at each other
with confident winks and settled back
to hear the decision in their favor.
81 know of no law to prevent a
railroad company from stealing u
mans farm" repeated Judge Davis,
"but so long as | sit Oh this bench |
will not permit them to keep it.
Decision for plaintiff. Chicago
News.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21
Plants Raised for their Perfume.

Some idea of the magnitude of the
business of raising sweet-scented
flowers for their perfume alone may
be gathered from the fact that Europe
and British India alone consume
about 100000 gallons of handkerchief
perfume yearly; that the English
revenue from French eau de cologne
of itself is $4,000 annually, and the
total revenue of England from other
imported perfumes, is estimated at
100000 each year. There is one great
perfume distillery at Cannes, in
France, which uses yearly about 10O,-
600 pounds of acacia flowers, 100000
pounds Of rare flower leaves, $4,000
pounds of jasaminc blossoms, and 90
600 pounds Of tuberose blossoms, to-
gether with an immense quantity of
other material used for perfume.
Victoria, in New South Whales, a
noted place for the production Of per-
fume-yielding plants, because such
plants as the mignionette, sweet ver-
bena, jasmine, rose, lavender, acacia,
heliotrope, rosemary, wall-flower
laurel, orange and sweet-scented GER
aniums are said to grow there in great
er perfection than in any other part
of the world.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21

alas you are married" "No."
"Then why have you no button 7"
"a Chinaman does my washing"
"Ab, hah !" "Well, wait till | gouge
my way through this rock, and will
lend you my button" ooh, thank
you" Hist the turnkey comes"
After long silence, "Has the turn.
key gonef" the Abbc asked. "Not
yet" "Well, then, when he goes tell
me, and ! will resume work." "All
right; he's gone now." 81 am at
work." Scoop, scoop, scoop. A long
bony arm was thrust into De Make
shifts cell. De Makeshift seized it
and pressed the elbow to his lips.
The Able stepped into the cell. We
must escape from here" said the
Able. How" "By scaling the
walls" "How can we scale them
without a knife?" "Wait." The
Abbe took off his shirt, tore it into
shreds, and in marvellous manner
made Il ladder. "Got a couple of
pinsY' What do you want with
them ?" Make hooks to go on the
end Of the ladder" Here they are"
"Now," said the Able, bending the
pins and fastening them on the ladder,
follow me" They passed out into
the courtyard. De Makeshift utter
ed an exclamation. He saw the man
who had poisoned his grandfather.
The Able threw the ladder. The
pins caught hold. The two men es.
caped.-Arkansaw Traveller.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21
He Would Argue with the Highway
man

Mr.. McRoberts, now editor of the
Leeds England Mercury, was at one
time reporter in this city. He was
the most argumentative, and, at the
same time, the calmest man that ever
struck the town. He would stop
work at fire to argue. Mr.. Roberts
was on his way home early one morn
ing, when an American citizen sud-
denly popped up with pistol leveled
at his head and said:
Throw up your hands,"
"Why?' asked Mr.. Roberts, un-
disturbed.
Throw them up
"But what for ?"
"Put up yer hands," insisted the
footpad, shaking the pistol. "Will
you do what 1 tell you ?"
"That depends" said Mr.. McRob-
erts. "If y@ can show me any rea-
son why should put up ma hands,
III no say but what | weel; but yer
mere requaisl wad be no justification
for me to do sac absurd Il thing. Moo
why should you, complete stranger,
ask me at this 'oor O the mornin', on
a public street, tae put up my hands p
"Dash you !" cried the robber, eff
you don't quit gabbln and obey or
ders, I'll blow the top of your head
off,"
"Whaat Faith, man, ye must be
DOT o yer head. Come moo, puir bud.
dy," said Mr. McRoberts, soothingly,
cody catching the pistol and wrestling
it with a quick twist cut OF the mans
hand ; "come, moo, an I'll show We
where they'll take care o yel Hech |!
Dinna we try tao fetch, or ecod I'll
shoot ye. By the way, ye might as
weel put up yer ain hands, and jist
walk ahead O. me- That's it. Trude
ava noo,"
And SO Mr.. McRoberts marched
his man to the city prison, and hand
ed him over to Capt. Douglass.
ut wuddna be a bad idea tae PIN
in straitiacket," he said, serenely, to
the officer. "There's little doot about
the duddy's daft"
And he resumed his interrupted
homeward walk.-San Francisco
Post.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21
Sleeping Positions.

A medical paper has new health
preserving racket-that of sleeping
with the face downward. These plans
and specifications for sleeping are get
ting little too numerous. We al
ways try to live up to them. When
some old medical authority who has
got his cemetery full and retired from
active slaughter shouts that a person
should sleep with his head toward the
north so that the electric currents will
pass through the body OH the proper
route, we sleep that way. If another
moss-grown practitioner, with as good
record for fatality, solemnly asserts
that the only authorized and fully
guaranteed way to slumber is with
the head toward the south, and gives
the same reason as the other. We ust
move the pillow aft and turn in.
When still another rival of the pale
rider, with his back broken by lift
ing OH the rate of mortality, announ-
ccs that the only way to get along
peacefully with the electric currents
is to sleep with the head to the east
or west, so that they will slide over
the body and butt against the head
board of the bedstead, we promptly,
even gladly, comply. Every time
the word comes along the line for a
change it finds us a ready and willing
victim. They are coming rather too
fast, however. 1t begins to look as if
we could not get through whole
night without vcering around to some
new direction or position. 1t will
soon be necessary to get up three or
four times night and go down and
get the mail and see what the latest
chart OH sleeping is. Some genius will
have to bring out bedstead with
clock-work attached that will keep it
cotinually moving around, and make
il occasionally get up on its hind cas-
tors and turn couple of handsprings.
-Ex change.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21
A Masterpiece of Fiction.

The following is an extract from q
masterpiece of French fiction M.
de Makeshift, when the file of soldiers
left him, found himself in dungeon.
Not a ray of light penetrated the dis
nal abode, but De Makeshift's eyes
gradually became so accustomed to
the darkness that .he saw broom
straw lying in corner. He caught
up the broom-straw, uttered stifed
cry, and pressed it to his heaving
bosom. Then, in his despair, he tick
led his nose with the straw and laugh
ed. "Who laughs :" demanded n
voice. 81 do" "Who are you ?"
"De Makeshift. Who are you ~
"The Able So-Long." "Ahw "Ah
hah." "How long have you been
here?" 81 have now, alas l.no meth
cd of reckoning time, but / must
have been here since sunrise this
morning" De Makeshift groaned.
"Where are you now," he asked. "In
a tunnel" the Able replied. ga tun-
mel ?" "Yes," "You make my heart
beat. Where did you get the tunnel ?"
"Made it," "You astonish me-"
"Ah - "Ah p hah2 Where did you
get your shovel 2" "TTad none"
"Then how did you make the tunnel !"
"Listee." 81 will" II scoopcd it
out with shirt button. Have you a
button on your shirt" "No."
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21
Made to Order.

Alderman-"You arc charged with
entering the complainant's tent, while
camping out, with purposes of steal
ing. What have you to say ?"
Prisoner-"I didn't intend to steal,
your Honor. only went to see if
there was anything | could do for
him."
"Oh, yes then you admit that
you were found in the complainant's
tent I"
"Ycs, sir"
"Then it is for the intent sentence
you to sixty days" Pittsburgh
Chronicle.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21

81 see the scoundrel in your face"
exclaimed the judge to the prisoner.
81 reckon jedge," was the response,
"that ere's personal reflection, amt
il ?"-The Rambler.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21

The following notice appeared on
the west end of a country meeting
house; Anybody sticking bill against
this church will be prosecuted accord
ing to law or any other nuisance"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21

A farmer of Ithaca, n. Y, had to
defer the completion of some impor-
tant legal papers the other day be-
cause, after trying for twenty minutes
in his lawyers Office to recollect the
full name of his wife, he failed to do
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21

People hire lawyers in certain cases
for two reasons. One is for the set
tlement of disputes, and the other to
dispute settlements.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21

An ancient maiden subscribed for
an agricultural paper because she had
heard its "Notes on Husbandry" well
spoken of.-N. o. Picayune.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21

Bulwer was right; there's no such
word as fail. 1t is Modified into as
Observation-Disclosures Press.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21
WIT AND HUMOR.

1t seems possible to own n very
green lawyer by giving him fee
simple as a retainer.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21

A Lawyer was summoned as wit
ness in a certain case. The Judge,
finding that the witness was lying
badly, interrupted him, saying II beg
of you to forget your profession..for a
moment and tell us the truth. -
Spanish.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21

A great many partners in business
know that the old farmer who became
the mysterious Co. in a village gro-
Gerry was right when he said the diff
fculty about being a partner was that
eff you make anything. why somehow
you don't get it; and if you lose
anything, why you lose it ALL"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21

Time and politics work many Won
ders. A Chicago judge the other day
was called upon to sentence man
for embezzlement who carried in his
pocket petition for office and cer-
tifcate of character signed by the
same judge and the prosecuting at
torney baltimore Herald.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21

Teacher-"What is the difference
between the body and soul ?" Johnny
(vacantly)-"The body is mortal and
material the soul"-Teacher (impa-
tiently)-"Yes; and the soul p
Johnny-"The soul is immortal and
immaterial."
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21

Daily except Sunday.
1 Connect at Marquette with the Marquette,
Houghton a Ontonagon n. II. for points in wiscon-
sin and the Copper country. connect with Tri-
weekly stage for Manistique. Tri-weekly stage
for Grand Marais. 4 Daily stage for Sault Ste
Marie. Express trains Nos. and make close
connections with night trains from and 20 all East.
ern and Canadian points, on both Michigan Central
and Grand Rapids Indiana railroads.
No trains run south from Mackinac City Hatur-
day nights. No trains run north 20 Mackinac City
Monday mornings.
A. WATSON, n. W. ALLEN.
GenT Bup't, Gen1 Pass. 4 Tkt Agt.
Marquette, Mich. Marquette, Mich.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21
Detroit, Bay City& Alpena R'R.
Time Table No. Z.

All trains run by the Ninetieth Meridian ON Cen
trail Standard time.
rRAIss GOING SOUTH TRAINS GOING NORTH.
Nail sud Express Mail and Express.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21

Some of the decisions of the En-
glish courts read very funny. One of
the late ones is to the effect that after
a man is permanently dead-say for
some months-it is useless for him to
try and be divorced from his wife.
Any man who would carry his ami
mostly to the sweet hereafter in this
vindictive fashion, deserves to have
his memory and his petition sat upon
by an English judge.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21

During recent political conven-
tion in Arkansaw, when opposing fac
tions had locked horns and when il
seemed impossible to nominate can
didate, a man from the northwest
arose and exclaimed.
"Feller citizens, you are urging the
claims of your respective candidates,
but you do not give reason why any
of them should be nominated. l
came to fight for Colonel John Horn
rock.
"What has he done for the party p
cried a voice.
Never mind what he has done.
lie has done enough. He made five
hundred gallons of whiskey last year,
and
His voice was drowned by deafen-
ing shouts. Colonel John Hornrock
was nominated by acclamation.--
Texas Siftings,
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21

/ think Pm the unluckiest man in
town." said husband to his wife.
"Smith has owed me $50 for three
months, and he promised to pay me
to-day.
'"Didn't he pay ?" she asked, anx-
iously.
eyes, he paid, but while he was in
the act of giving me the money
Brown came in-you know I've owed
Brown $50 for more than a year-and,
of course, | had to turn the money
over to him. That's what | call hard
luck. New York Sun.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21

A Sure Test.-Fond Father
"Welcome home, my son. You have
been much missed and / am glad you
are through college.at last"
Graduate-"Yes. So am l."
Fond Father-"Did you bring your
books back :"
Graduate-"Books Books Books /?
Oh, yes | know what you mean.
No; / forgot them"
Fond Father-"You were hurried
in packing, l suppose. Well, my son,
your four years at college have cost
me sight of hard earned money, and
/ hope you improved your time"
Graduate-"You better believe |
did. Just feel the muscle on that
arm"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-21
MICHIGAN CENTRAL

The Niagara Falls Route.
Arrival and departure of trains noted below as
follows:
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1886-08-10
SNAIL rRurrs on rnE FARM.

To stock q small garden With ibe best
varieties requires only few dollars out
lay. anf the kin Necessary 20 keep them
In gooi condition Is within The reach OF
auy one Who l. Interested In The matter
We zen. rally see few scruoby and neg.
lsctei cufrAnt bushes Ia the grass along
the garden feucs. but not In one garden In
dotsn 80 We see much more Ia The hne
OF small fruits.
That men are fond of these fruits 10
proved hg the AVliiiy With which they
dispose of them when placed before them
In fhe shape Of pie, saort-cake, or eaten
with sugar or cream. They seem 10 for
ret. or overlook the fact, that the season
OF euloying these luxuries need not be con-
rnei 10 sumner. Canned fruits are near
IN A. good during the wiater. " properly
pst %. a. when iresh. and the expense
.ni trOubie % puttlng them up 1. not great.
More money l. usually speut Tor prunes
sud other driei fruit daring the winter Ia
families where fruit Is not put up, than II
would c0st - purchAse ars And sugar 70
prepare a supply 40 home. The women
viii take care OF the fruit u they only have
II 10 take care 0f. and will be glad 10 have
The chance 20 90 50.
should more fruit be produced than the
family can consume, 10 will meet Win
ready sale Al the nearest village, and usu-
ally hriug the grower better returns thAn
n sent 10 The overstOcked markets OF
( large city. Sell none bat the surplus
| im. 1TriruifHrisi flr AHg.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1886-08-10

Tin state Grange Festival occur. AZ
Ola Orchard. Tussiay. Wednesday. and
Thur.dsy. August "a. 2i. aud 20. With
an able and interesting programme. Oh
Orchard j. eleven miles from Portland.
on the Bo,,oa & Maine. and on the last
era R,ilroad. Il has ample hotel accom-.
modnions. grounds Coz ,sn,ing. groves.
hall.. and al the accommodations de-
mAnded for The occasion. lis beach j. OF
fae. hard sand. and j. UNSURPASSED in New
Ensland. Il !. Ia The form Of TIE afc Of =
circle. % mile. lors. snd AZ low water i
800 Zee, vide.
Good beard will BE- furnished from 81
10 sl.5O PEI day. Cottages can BE- bad
for from sos, 70 si.5O Per day. Il 4.
Carter of We, Searboro. and ;. NJ Blake
ofOldOfchafd. have charge Of the sroands
and board of cottages. and 20 them app'i'
cation can Be made by AL those ~an'iug
accommodations
This i, 20 be the greA; feast q the hAf-
,e., q he Patrons q Maine. and ii j.
hoped that they. With their wive. and
families. and friends. and al farmer. and
their families ~ho can. ~ill avail them
.slye. o. this opportunity Of few days
A. the seaside. a, celebrated aud beauii.
fal ola Orchard
Among The speakers 10 be present ~ill
be Master Robe. Overseer Gr,sofy. lse-
tursr Thing. Chaplain Hancock and Pas,
Lecturer Freeman. of the Maize State
Grange: Pa, Lecturer Earle. Of Massa-
ehuset,s State Grange; W. VI. S,inson.
Master Of Ne~ Hampshire State Grange
l. A. Gilbert. Secretary Of Ne Board OF
Agriculture: Prof. Jordan. Of the State
Experimental Station; Grand Chief lem
plar Nj. Dow : l.. Boardmsn. Ssere-
tAry of Maine PomologicAl Society. and
othsrs-among whom may De President
FernAld of State Collsg Prof BAllen,ine
% the same: Rufus Prince Of State Ak.
riculiural society; Hoa. y. A. Luce.
State Sapi q schools. etc. Ext. ;.
Commissioner Of Agriculture Hon. Geo.
3. loung. now President Of the Nes
England Agricultural Society. and Hon.
Rufu, Prince. President Of the State Az
r.cul,aral Socieiy. have been invited 70
give addresses. and one or both will prob
ably Be present. The three candidates
ior Governor q toe State. being all pfae-
teal farmers. will Of course be present
and mipsle freely with their brother
farmers.
The railroads will carry the round iiiP
ior one fare. The circulars announcing
fall particular. will soon be placed before
The d.hersr, Oranges