Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-03-18
A FEW SUGGESTIONS.
What q Dakota Editor Has to Say About
a Dictionary Revision.

Dictionary Revision.
A new edition of Webster's dictionary
| is soon to be issued under the editor
ship of President Porter, of Yale. II
will doubtless be found so difficult to
reconcile the spelling with the many
approved forms in use in this free
country that the professor might as
well not try that, but we want to say a
word to him about the pictures. Some
of them need reforming. They should
at least be rounded up and some of the
corners cut off and fixed around little
generally, while few of them should
be fired.
The picture of the whisk- broom comet
with hole in it must go. 1t don't
help on the grand cause of astronomy
to any very great extent. While in
the astronomy business you might as
well put little more neck on the moon
fish. You will find it hard work to
convince the rising generation that this
fish butted his head against the stern of
a boat and drove it down into his
shoulders till his dorsal fin grows out
of his eyebrow.
1t would also probably be better to
set the legs about six inches farther
front on the tlamingo. The latest
tlamingo fashion plates show that they
are wearing their legs well up in the
vicinity of the neck-tie. 1t might be
well to put little less villainOus ex-
preston on the dodo. The dodo is
dead, and there is no use of trying to
run on him and make sport of him any
longer, even if it was considered the
correct thing in Webster's time.
The pelican also needs revising. He
is too poor, and we would suggest
that you take him in hand personally
and stall-feed him for few weeks.
Goldfish newly extracted from the
briny deep will do the business don't
expect to see him pick up on diet of
railroad spikes and cord-wood like an
ostrich.
The way Webster laid out the cow
isn't altogether in accordance with
modern usage. He only has one place
marked sirloin, whereas sirloin steak
can be cut from any part of the ami
NAL.
The ridge-pole on the Bactrian
camel ought to be Strengthened out
little. While you are fixing him over
you might as well put better looking
countenance on him.
You had better bounce the present
picture of the orang-outang and get
him to sit again. The rhinoceros
should also go unless you can secure
a portrait which does not look quite so
villainous. The one now in the book
is not st to associate with the other ami
mails. Try and get little more pleas
ant expression on the gorilla. Have
him hold his chin a little higher and
try and look natural. As he is at pres
ent he is one of the worst looking
scoundrels in the book. Have the hip
popotamus open his mouth; while the
hippOpotamus on every circus-poster
in the country stands with his mouth
open displaying four rows of teeth the
one in Webster has the entrance to his
provision depot Theoretically sealed
and one ear sawed Off
hauling. Take the anticipating off
the back of the hooded basllisk-it il
not fashionable. Unite the knot in the
bOa-cOnstrictOr and remove the string
of brass baggage checks from the tail OF
the rattlesnakc. Take the stand-up
collar off the frilled lizard and put
basque on him. Let reform be the
watchword in the great work you have
neutrality-suspicious. Cd. T.) Bell.