davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1886-09-18
TWO NEAT REPLIES.
How Andrew Jackson Silenced an Exceed
ingly Boastful Individual.

How Andrew Jackson Silenced an Exceed
ingly Boastful Individual.
Andrew Jackson, it is related, was at
one time entertained at dinner by gen.
tleman, and among those present was
one of those people who often find their
way into story books, ETC., as the type
of that offensive class of Americans who
are always trailing their nationality in
the dust in the effort to exhalt their in
dividual independence. This particular
gentleman, over the wine and walnuts
after dinner, in order to emphasize his
own independence of disposition, of
which he was loudly boastful, remarked
with rare exhibition of self-compla-
cence to General jackson:
81 always vote against you, sir. y"
The company was naturally rendered
speechless by this unexpected disclosure,
and the scene actually looked squally;
but General Jackson put stopper on
the boastful individual and avoided fur
ther trouble by smilingly remarking:
"And l, sir, have always fought the
battles of my country that you might
enjoy that privilege"
AuOllCt iIiothilCC VI u Hdppy IOspOuSC
is that of the old Southern judge-but
whether Il judge in courtesy or in fact,
the writer can not state-who must
have had the faculty of quick and ap-
propriatc reply pretty we'll developed,
if the story related of him is true. He
had been fierce Secessionist, and the
fact was not forgotten when, after the
war, he re-entered the political arena Of
his native State. Speaking at certain
place one evening in the interest of his
own candidacy for Congress some one
in the audience, who evidently had a
good memory, inquired:
"Didn't you speak here just before
the warp"
II did," promptly responded the
judge.
"And didn't you say we could whip
the Yankees with pop-gunsp"
II did," replied the unabashed Judge,
"but, confound 'em, they wouldn't fight
that way!'-Piltsburgh Dispatch.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1886-09-18
ALTAR OF ROSES.
Sweet Perfume Which Is Sold at One Hu
dred Dollars Per Ounce.

Sweet Perfume which Is Sold at One ii Hun'
dred Dollars Per Ounce.
''Do you have much call for altar
of roses?" asked Il reporter of prom
inent chemist and dealer in drugs in
this city.
''Oh yes," said the dealer. "but there
is very little of the genuine article sold
in New York; it is too expensive. The
genuine altar of roses, which is made in
India and Australia, costs one
hundred dollars an ounce ut the
thousand roses to make an ounce of
altar. The roses which are used are the
common roses, of which variety there
are large yields in California, where the
distillation of altar could be made very
profitable. l have been through that
part of the country and have seen hedge
rows near Sonoma. in that State, so
dense with these roses that the odor
from them caused feeling of faintness
and oppression on the passer-by. In
India the roses are, however, regularly
cultivated. They are planted in rows
in the fields and are particularly hardy"
''Do you know any thing of the pro,
cess used in distilling the attar?"
1.-The work is done by women and
childrsl, who regard it merely as a pleas
ure. AS soon as the roses begin to
bloom they are picked. The leaves are
then separated and distilled in twice
their weight of water, which is after
ward drawn off into open vessels.
These stand over night, being covered,
to keep out dirt and insects, which are
attracted by the odor of the roses. In
the morning the water is coated with a
thin oily film. This Is the rare altar OF
roses. 1t is skinned off with fine
feather and put into walls, which are
Theoretically sealed. So it may well be
imagined that any essence or oil that re-
quired the distilling of fifty thousand
roses to fill an ounce vial is worth every
pit of the price asked for it."-M Y
Mail and E1press.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1886-09-18
A DESPERATE MAN.
How an Editor Came Mighty Near Get.
ting Into n Fuss With Him.

How an Editor Came Mighty Near Get.
ting Into n Fuss With Him.
Hostetter McGinnis is an arrant cow
ard, but at the same time he is very boast
full. Meeting Gilhooly, he said:
"Bill Snort came mighty near getting
into fuss this morning."
with whom?'
"With me. tell you he had pretty
close call.''
..What was it all about?"
'.Well, you see last week there was q
piece in Snort's paper about me having
stolen hog in Cameron County. The
article went on to say that red-hot
stove wouldn't be safe if I was around.
and it seemed to me that it was u sorter
reflection on my honesty"
"Yes, read the article. It was rath.
er personal.
jess so. Well, thought I'd call ON
the editor and ask him what he meant.
if could find him in"
"Did you find him inp'
"Yes, he was in; so asked him II ha
meant to impeach my honesty. What
do you suppose he saidP"
1--WE no idea"
"He said didn't have any honesty to
impeach, and with that he hit me in the
eye with his fist. happened to notice
that there was pistol on the desk and
as quick as lightning l grabbed it."
"Did you shoot him?" 4
"No; Just grabbed the pistol to keep
him from shooting me with it. As soon
as l got hold of it darted out the door.
He took after me, but couldn't overtaka
me. What do you suppose Snort has
done nowp He has come out in his pa
per and charged me with stealing the
pistol, when only took it to keep him
from shooting me with it. Snort is too
darned reckless in what he says and
does, and some of these days he'll get
hurt"
"Yes; he'll stump his too sunning
after you "-2eras Sytings.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1886-09-18
THE PECULIAR MAN.
A Public Nuisance Which is to be Found
Almost Every rywhere.


Almost Everywhere.
The peculiar man is a public nuisance.
He obtrudes his popularity on all occa-
sions with the same sort of pride that
causes Neapolltan beggar to glory in
the display of some ghastly deformity.
The peculiar man glories in his Pc
culiarity; he calls it individuality, and
AYERS very truthfully that nothing should
make a man sacrifice his individuality.
He quotes: 1.-The leopard can not change
his spots,' and so emphasizes his pc
culiarities.
The peculiar man invariably has the
most remarkable set of principles. True,
one should have principles. but it re-.
mains the province of popularity to
force its principles down the helpless
throat of its neighbor. Our peculiar
man accounts for all his unpleasant
traits by the stock remark: "Oh, you
know am peculiar man." And so
he is-peculiarly disagreeable.
The leopard S spots are born with him;
usually the product of cultivation, and
exaggerated 10 Iornl an excuse lot pau
temper, obstinacy or some equally un-
pleasant trait, only permissible with
out reproof, behind the shelter of
popularity.
What right has any man to claim q
monopoly of traits either good or bad?
A man goes about growing at every
thing, q perfect bear, never pleasant,
civil word for any one. "But then he
is peculiar man." A man eats at
outrageous hours, it is all right. He is
peculiar. A man drinks every thing or
nothing, goes nowhere or everywhere.
has bad manners. bad habits. bad
clothes; but claims popularity and feels
himself safely hedged from criticism
and entirely exempt from the duties
owed by the civilized, commonplace
man to his fellows. This sketch is not
funny, it isn't intended to be funny-it
is moral.-N. Y Graphic.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1886-09-18
NOSES REMODELED.
A Berlin Surgeon Who Repairs and Re-
makes Noses of Every Description.

Berlin Surgeon Who Repairs and Re-
makes Noses of Every Description.
There are some people in this world
who should carry their noses in scab-
bard, if for no other reason than to hide
them from the public gaze. New
Orleans is full of such people. Many
of them have knotty, lumpy, flat,
twisted and curly noses, which are a
positive humiliation to the owners and
a source of much modification to the
rest of mankind. But the ugly nosed
men and women need no longer suffer.
The hour of their deliverance from un-
calmly beaks has come, and if they do
not haul out the artillery and fire a
salute it is their own fault.
A Berlin surgeon has discovered the
art of repairing and rcmodeling noses
of all sizes and ages. He can take a
nose shaped like an artichoke and by
his peculiar method turn it into beauti-
full and really classic snout. He bars
nothing. The fact of the matter is he
invites the hideous and pays premium
for it. The man with nose twisted
like gourd handle or rams horn is
his pleasure. The man with no nose at
all is his delight and Joy.
This Berlin surgeon, when he gets
hold of bad nose, puts chloroform un-
der it and then grasps it with pair of
bone forccps and smashes, cuts and
knocks it into pulp, and then he goes
quietly to work, and, with the nasal
bone for a foundation, builds a nose
that makes the gods weep with envy,
and which is real luxury to wipe and
to blow.
This discovery is going to be bless
ing to the human race, for the reason
that he is willing to impart to his broth
or professionals the knowledge he has
gained concerning noses, and to make
them the beneiioiaries of his art. This
generosity on his part leads us to be-
lieve that good deal OF ugliness now
existing in the human family will be de-
stroyed. For instance, the society girl
with pug nose tilted up at tho end,
and which causes her to look as ii she
were constantly smelling u boneyard oil
u garbage barrel, can have it trans
formed into proboscis Us delicate and
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1886-09-18
THE NOBLE RED MAN.

A Boston Malden's Poetic View of tho
Warriors of the Plains.
He was Kansas man and he was in
Boston for the first time, where he was
introduced to Miss Dudine, who said to
him:
"Oh, Mr.. Granger, have you ever
seen any of those dear delightful In
dams in the West?"
''Injunsp You bet; last fellow I saw
fore left was red-skinned Cherokeep"
"How enhancing! And did he have
any scalps with himp"
zone. He wore it on his head-it
was his own"
''And was he in his war paint, and
did he have name like Rolling Thun-
der or White Windp"
"No, guess he hadn't any war paint
on himself, but he was layin' some on
the town. and his name wasn't Rollin'
Thunder; we always called him Jim
Smith"
"But was he a real Indanp"
"Pure quill; guess none of 'em moro
"But he was surely on the war path,
wasn't hep Methinks l see him now,
standing on the brow of a mighty hilli
his eagle eye glances athwart the peace
full valley below, where his fathers slum-
ber; and strange, fierce sadness sweeps
over his dusky face, and he kneels down
and makes this fearful vow: Great
Cheitaln, Manitou of the Cherokees.
hear me-"
"No, miss. you're away Off Jim
Smith wasn't that kind OF a man; last
saw of him he was hangin around John
sons drug store, trying to work them
for snifter at the jug behind tine pre-
scription case. "--Sh Louis WHIP.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1886-09-18

~ captivating as that worn by the hand
some girl whose likeness is imprinted
on our silver dollar. The person with
a short nose can have il properly and
artistically elongated; the long nose can
be judicously curtailed, and the fat and
warty nose treated in such manner as
to make 1t appear thin and muscular.
The greatest benefit to be derived from
the discovery, however, is the fact that
IL will make the men of to-day braver
and reader than they are to battle for
their personal rights, for the reason that
IL they get into fight and their noses
are mashed. they can 60 off and put
them in dock and have them repaired at
small cost. A broken nose will not
amount to much more than u broken
walking stick, and the dudes careful OF
their good looks will be happy.
1t is the one ambition Of the Berlin
surgeons life to secure the job of put
ting decent nose on the Duke of Cum
berland. The Duke was born without
a nose. and scrub doctor, who pre-
tended to know oil about such things,
made him nasal organ out of flesh cut
from his aristocratic arm. Unfor-
tunately, however, for the Duke, his
nose looks like huge red tumor,
which wabbles from one side to the 9TH
err when he walks. and trembles and
oscillates in the wind as If it were q
clump of jelly. The Berlin nose-maker
SAYS that he can remove the one-horse
affair from the face of the Duke and
build him royal smcller that will
stand up against a forty-mile gale as
stiff Us the bowsprit of Dutch IRON
clad He will guarantee it not to flop,
shake or to become loose in its fasten-
ings, and, therefore, we advise the
Duke to take advantage of the oppor-
tunity and get beak with some back
bone to it.-M O. States.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1886-09-18
PiTH AND POINT.

Because good building Is slow work.
= slow worker Is not necessarily good
builder
No man was ever so mean that he
could not give advice. .-NeU Haoer
NesDs. Well, go on; what were you GO
ing to sayp- Washington Post
From Belgian newspaper: A young
man who proposes to marry wishes tc
meet man of discretion and ex.
perience who will dissuade him from tbs
attempt Address u. H., post-oflice.
do you believe in faith curesG"
mo" "But understand your mother
in-law was cured of q long.standing
complaint through this method" Eyes.
that's why don't believe in them. "
Iid-Bits.
A solemn, gray-haircd old man
came in town one day this week and
said the fish in the Sioux river were Out
on the banks tanning themselves with
their tails. Nobody seemed to doubt
them. --EStelline Bell. .
The girl who never screams wheH
she sees snake isn't safe girl te
marry. With her calm, cool, collected
unexcitable disposition, she would hit
| where she aimed with the rolling-pin
every time.--N Y. Independent.
| You know, when we were boys and
| girls, there used to be spiritual me-
dumsP Well. there are none now.
They are all ''psychometrsts and clair
voyant delineators." But they still use
the same fearful and wonderful gram.
mar and spell separate with two p's
and three e's rs of yore. -Burdette.
A Very Thoughtful Woman: A
man went home the other night and
found his house locked up. After in.
finite trouble he managed to gain an
entrance through back window, and
then discovered on the parlor table
note from his wife, reading: II have
gone out. You will find the key on the
side of the step. IN Y Ledger.
The sweet-pea is now fashionable.
1t has not the gaudy, leonine beauty OF
the sunilower, and it lacks the tawny,
titanic toggery of the tiger lily, while
as dollar-jerker to the Jacqueminot
rose the sweet-pea is nowhere, but for
neat, unadulterated Renaissance of the
back yard and your first girl, with her
hair down her back in two braids, the
sweet-pea sweeps the deck with whole
royal sequence of the boyish past
Philadelphia Times.
An Englisman, calling at the White
House, was dcscanting TO Mr.. Lincoln
who had never been abroad-about
the difference between Englishmen and
Americans. ''Great difference in some
respects" he said, 'great difference.
You Americans do things that an En-
glish gentleman would never think OF
doing Now, for instance, an English
gentleman would never think of black
ing his own boots" "Ah, indeedr'
said Mr.. Lincoln, "whose would he
black?' ?'-4ryonaut.
Memory
wish that could remember
Our minister's sunday text:
My memory Is so treacherous,
| That Pm often rea ly vexed
When asked about some sermon
Which l know was very fine,
| 1t is dreadful mortifying
| When can't recall line.
| FIVE MINUTES LATER.
Did notice Miss Jenkins bonnet;
| Yes; what n horrd shape!
And noticed Miss Brown was wearing
| Her old last seasons cape.
She wears different trimming
Last year, you know, twas fur
But remember the garment
As well rs do her.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1886-09-18
Why He Bought a Revolver.

'Heard you've been out fishing,
GadsbyP"
"Yes, spent the best part of ten days
setting on wet rock and holding pole
over the water"
"Catch any thingp"
"Naw. Miserable luck! Would you
believe it, every time pulled my line
out one afternoon my bait was gomez !
felt like asking the railroad and hotel
for my money back"
"Yes, should think you would
You We're entitled to re-bait, any
how"
Gadsby has traded off his fishing out
fit for a nickel-plated revolver. --Mer-
chant Traveler.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1886-09-18
A SUMMER MEMORY.


Running from the shaded porch,
Where, like an inverted torch,
swings tile trumpet. flower, tile path,
Glorious with the aftermath
OF the carly summer days,
Leads us on to pleasant ways,
Through the gardens perfumed space,
Where the lliy's stately grace
Shines in all the fair and pure
Whlteness OF Its garmonture,
just above the circiing sod.
Velvet leaves of crumbling hue,
sparkling with nights honeyed dew,
Forming radInnt caverns where
Gauze- winged mites make fragrant lair,
Show the perfect, calm repose
or that regal bloom, the rose.
Telling of the early spring,
yiolets to their sweetness cling
Crimson with high summers blood,
And the silver larches fret
Over beds OF miRn0nette.
Where the 1.-THE and rustling mass
OF the meadows ripenInv grass
Clings about the gardens edge,
There We see, along the hedge,
Creamy chalices that hold
just a speck OF yellow gold.
Then the clover blossoms toss
Wnere the pathway winds across
Level sweeps, where rise and sink
Flutlng of the bobolink,
And the thrushes loudly call
just beyond the tumbling wall.
Heavy with its bearded store,
BY the rivers winding shore
Bends the wheat, that ready stands
For the reaper's brawny hands,
Murmuring a melodlous song
When the summer wind grows strong.
Up against the mellow skiesl
Gradual sloping hills arise,
Wooded by great trees, that screen
With their whispering robes of green
Winding roads, where shadows seem
Like the vistaS OF Il dream.
Here, along the noisy brooks,
Lie the hidden, sunlit hooks,
Where the starred nnemOne
WOOs the kisses of the bee,
Blooming Just within the shade
BY massive oak tree made.
Here the hours are cool and fleet,
And we move with lingering feet
Down the slope, and see the sun,
When the meadow paths are won,
Flaming just above the crest
or = mountain In the west.
Thomas S. Collier, in Travellers Record.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1886-09-18

"A new sewing-machine, said to do
excellent work, has been brought out in
England, and is meeting with an enor-
nous sale. 1t is the invention of a
German, 1t makes a perfect lock-stitch,
is only eight inches wide, and once inch
in thickness. 1t contains no wheels,
and is fastened to table by means of u
thumb clamp. 1t sells for two dollars
and siXty-two cents. AS it can be packed
in a small box it can be carried in tho
pocket
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1886-09-18
A Remarkably Smart Man.

"Say, Milus, when air yer gwine ter
name yer new boyp" a negro upo,
meeting an acquaintance, asked.
'Done named him."
'Dat SOP"
"Yes, sah."
"Hopes yer gin him or big name"
IL did. Named him arter or big Con-
gressman.
" 'What does yer call hmp"
"Oleomargarine Bill"
''Dat's right. Name him arter dc
statesmen an do folks kahn say dat he's
or slouch, Dat generman what yer
named him arter hil' dc whole Congress
fur laung time, an O. cose mus be ar
smart man. ."-Arkansaao Traveller.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-02-14
ON 'CHANGE.

AT Liverpool yesterday American
wheat was unchanged. Corn firm,
with fair demand.
A WELL KNOWN cotton buyer faid
yesterday: 81 have been buying cot
ton for sixteen years, and this is the
chilliest February ever saw."
CLOSING prices for May options at
Chicago yesterday: Pork, $l1 273.
Lard, 22lc. Clear rib sides. 5.65c.
Corn, 402c bid. Wheat, S5c bid.
Oats, 323c.
THE New York Post, in its cotton re-
view, says future deliveries opened
$1,000 to 4-100c lower, and closed Feb
ruary 3-l00c, March 2-100c and balance
1-l00c TO 2-l00c higher than yesterday.
REPORT OF Grain Elevator yesterday:
Wheat received, 1896 bushels; with
drawn, 2lO0 busheis; ih si"sa h4Gl
bushels. Corn received, 1904 bushels !;
Withdrawn, 1919 bushels; in store, 3d.
742 bushels. Oats received, 1912
bushels; withdrawn, BIOS bushels; in
store, 47,7l7 bushels.
VIsIToRs on Change yesterday: 7.
II. Dickson, Jackson, Miss; l.. A.
Downs, Gave City, KY; Madison Car
yer, Miss Alice w. Thucott, Miss Kate
VILLAIN, Brownsville; ]. N. Pulliam,
DRESDEN; Mrs. ]. L. Webster, Mrs. S.
A. Whitford, Mrs. Schiller, Mrs. W.
V. Weaver, Elizabeth, N. j.; Il. g,
LattiDg, ir., Greusds, Miss.
THE New York Commercial BulLtin
states that the cotton market closed
Thursday with an increased senii-
that the market had taken start for
a better position. The 'sentimer :, :
however, as near a. could be = .,scov.
cred, was about the princir h.s;s ss
the foreign advices su0" se;a3 nnthinv
beyond a hope that i ;S'9 for the bets
So , m th o and, and from home
sUut0vs tno ~oowing is by no meahs
ui;os ~ The chances for sup
P'se are apparently about as good as
! .er some time past, and in addition tc
the easy I.nblic accounts from the
south the private Information for.hti
tends TO. confirm the belief that the
desire % realiEs is being stimulated by
incr Jasing financial necessities among
no ders OF the cotton. The dealings in
F,pots were unimportant and quota
|. tons remained as before, with possibly
a slightly steadier feeling ruling among
helders OF desirable parcels"
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-02-14
TRANSFERS.

t5Zsette Ulma1 to Charles Troglio,
Part of 146 west side Of Main street,
near Winchester, 25:79x55 feet for
1850.
A. ]. Harris, County Trustee, 10 ].
G. Handwerker, lot SO, 7Sxl484 feet,
west side Third street, Chelsea, for
81 88.
K. O. Rodgers to ]. H. Malone, trus-
tee, to secure John Armistead and H.
@. Watson in the sum Of $3.50, lots Al,
AZ and 43, Flippin's subdivision.
oHANoERY SALES.
Lot II, block 62, Dixon subdivision,
70xl50 feet, east side of Porter street,
TO John Donnelly, 800,
Lot 8, block 81, to John Grehan,
$1l0.
Lot 10, to John GrehaD, sos.
Lot 10, to John GrehaB, 1882.
Lot 20, to John Grehan, $l96.
Lot 10, to Tbeo. Reed, 500.
Lot IA, to Theo. Reed, $l00.
Lot IL, to Theo. Reed, sos.
Lot Is, to Theo. Reed, $l25.
Lot at south west corner Orleans and
Georgia, 40xl50 feet, to M. Gavin,
$l2l5.
Lot 3S, on plan city OF Memphis, tc
John Brennan, 5000.
Lot Al, ON plan City Of Memphis, tc
M. Gavin, $1,000.
Lot l00xlt0 feet, north side Taboo
street, between Main and Shelby, Il
j. M. Harrington, $1,000
Lot Z, country lot 5'4, west sidt
Manassas street, 50x2l4 feet, to J. +
McKeon, $46S.