Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1886-01-23
LEONE LOCAL CHAT.

attack of weather was too much for it,
and now the Doctors will have to fall
back on the general debility dag
nosis again, tho it don't spread over
as much ground as malaria. You can
hardly convince the minor population
that general debility has conscripted
their forces so that there is chance
for some medicine man to coin anoth-
er comprehensive phrase which will
satisfy the pill-swallowing portion of
this community that they are very
sick indeed and if they owe their
recovery to the Lord, it needn't him
der you from collecting the bill.
Yes it is dull, awful. l went down
street Tuesday morning [you know
what kind of a season that was, the
earth had its smooth side out, and
drew" better than even the Kittie
Rhoades Combination i to see if 1
couldn't see somebody exercise in
impromptu gymnastics. was even
willing to see myself sit down gently,
rather than miss having some good
natured fun; but / never fell once,
just my luck; nothing is so detrimen-
tai to flourish of attitude and dignity
as an inclined pavement in the ice
business and anomalous as it seems
the colder the spot where man sits
down prematurely the warmer the
language that flows from his mouth.
X
Ever and anon somebody harps up
on woman's Eve-iike propensity to
exhibit undue and ouer-do curl
osity. | am not rising up to under
mine that ancient charge nor to ami
hilate it with dynamitish language,
but to merely remark that the conta-
gion thereof has found first-class sub
jects among the opposite sex. 1t has
come down the incline of years and
struck the Adam of to-day pretty
hard.
AS rule men are the worst suffer-
ers by it; mo sarcasm bandaged up
in this When this infection takes
hold of man he advertises that fact
extensively and don't seem able to
help himself; courtesy, breeding,
manners, the simplest amenities of
life, fly away before it like chaffi the
wind; one simple illustration will
serve to point moral and adorn a
tale. In one of the principal business
rooms of this town some gentlemen
stood around not long ago in that easy
attitude of lettering commonly as
sumed among wayside congregations.
A lady about to leave the room was
recalled and instantly everymouth few |
shut and ears opened. No call off
" Attention" ever received swifter |
obedience but for the break of the !
two voices, there was silence that |
might have been; and take this |
method Of kindly but firmly assuring
that attentive audience,-W0s very
sensibly felt, by at least one Of the
speakers.
What 1 was going to say of women
in this connection is that they keep, |
even curiosity, well in hand. They |
are, as a rule, born diplomats ; grow
that lack and finesse which plays thro'
speech and action like lightning with
mushroom celebrity. Where nature
has not given these, there is often
sturdy self-respect, and respect for the
possible sensibilities of others; and
if all these fail, there is the dernier re-
sort for all, assume a virtue if you
haye it not"
| found the editorial scissors on the
desk and made use of them. The
Martinsburg Invincibles may read
and take courage. They began at the
foot of the ladder. Cincinnati En-
quirerl. Senator Davis of West Va,
is a popular and self-made man, as
the following "reminiscences show In
1882 dinner party was given in New
York City. Henry G. Davis sat at
one end of the table F; Simon Cameron
of Pennsylvania sat at the other, and
Gen. w. T. Sherman at the head. The
General began a Renaissance of his
life by saying:
IN mt
Come, now Sherman" interrupted
Mr.. Davis, "were you ever lieuten-
ant ?" Yes, Davis" he replied, 81
was lieutenant about the time you
were brakeman on freight train"
"Well, boys" observed Cameron,
81 don't suppose either of you ever
cut cord wood for living, as l did,"
~
ave heard a cynical old bachelor,
the other day say that women swal-
low fattery as babies do buttons,
without any idea of the trouble that
may follow. "-Stdtesnla9l
This is a Misrepresentation upon the
bachelors" part, who has evidently
forgotten that in this, as in much else,
/" all things are not what they SEEM"
AS a matter of fact women have
great deal of native courtesy, and will
listen attentively and try to appear
interested in the most meaningless
bosh, even, rather than show any
symptoms of being bored. The aver
age man has habit of talking to wo-
men as tho he knew everything and
had only one evening to tell it all in.
He also has habit, of pre-supposing
that in the distribution of brains the
daughters are disinherited or at least