Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1886-03-18
FACTS AND FANCIES.

day work, morbis SabbaticHs.
The clergy, You may have noticed,
are much more torcibly reminded Of the
"uncertainty of life" when million
aire dies suddenly thsa when poor
man drops dead,
Up in Canada they say cockney Eng
lishmen just over are the only ones who
call it "tobogganing," Tho natives
call il sliding" and the toboggm is
called traineau.
Booze" money, and butter were
among the answers Of tho congregation
of New York newsboys to n Clergyman
who ask them: What is the most pow
crful thing on earth"
The colored people Of Charleston, s.
c., have formed mutual protective
union to assist them In securing justice
in the courts Of that state, which they
feel is sometimes denied them,
A Philadelphia dime museum has on
exhibition "human Volcano" whose
breath is of such high temperature that it
sets fire to a piece of paper held before
1t. Tho fellow came from Kentucky.
Contagious diseases have excited
the people of Fairhaycn, Mass, to such
u degree that tho horse ears carry two
bags of camphor rs disinfectants, one at
each end, placed there by tho board Of
health.
The people Of Atlanta, Ga, sunk
$780, In an artesan well 1900 feet
deep, only to learn, from professor OF
the state university, that the city stood
on granite rook-tho bedrock of the
continent.
The grinding of the crown-glass disk
of the immense lens Of Lick Observable
~, California, is we'll under way ut
Cambridge, Mass, yet whole years
work remains TO be done before Il can
be finished.
Under the Oregon law, u person who
loses money Mt the gaming tables is
entitled to recover double the amount,
and Portland party who deposited
1925 in faro bank has recovered judg-
ment for $3.50,
An honest but rather illiteratc old
farmer, while addressing II school-houso
audience on intemperence, confessed
that he had been drinking man.
'.But, my friends,' he said, ~ never
drank To success"
at makes me fink, il makes me fink"
said Il little 4-ycar-old ono day ut din
ner. What makes you thinkp" said
papa when ! go to grandpa's ho
says n prayer when we sit down TO tho
table; when ! come home (and no hesi-
tated) don't hear the prayer"
Cincinnati was ninety-seven years old
Monday. II was on Dec. 20, 1883, that
Israel Ludlow and about twenty others
landed on the present site Of the city
and concluded TO settle there. In 1889
Fort Washington was erected, and In
1902 the city of Cincinnati was incor-
porated.
"Did you attend church. my daugh-
tcrP" Eyes, papa" "IIow did you
like the sermonP" "Well, the minister
stuck to his text, and must say deliv-
cred very cheerful though somewhat
unreasonable discourse" "What was
the textP" "Many are cold but few are
frozen"
The mad-dog craze in New Jersey
and New York is becoming laughable.
The superintendent of the New York
dog pound testiiies to its foolishness.
people come here almost every day
and ask us to take away mad dogs.
When we get there the dog is no more
mad than the people,"
'Do you ever stop to think, young
man." said clcrcal-looking gentleman
to the passenger in the seat ahead,
"what the future may have in
s.oreP" Indeed ] do, sir" was the
melancholy reply II realize that my
future is dark and uncertain" "And
you will strive to make It brighterP"
81 am powerless in the matter. II all
rests with the managers. I'm profess
sional baseball player"
Gentleman: "How are matters pro-
crossing in the church, Uncle Rastus--
Aourishing?" Uncle Rastus: 81 hain't
prcahin' da no mo- sah." Gentlcman:
"Why, what's the troublep" Uncle
Rastus: "Hit's all OWN ter de drought.
sahp" Gentleman: "rhe drought"
Uncle Rastus: Eyes, sab. Yo' sees, /
prayed TO rain TO foah Sundays in con-
cesshun, sab, an da didn't no rain
come, an so dc membahs OBJ do congre-
gashun axed TO my resignashun on dc
groun's of disincablity."
Among the relics of the late war
slowed away in the United States
ordnance museum is a saber fully five
feet long, which was found on the bat
tlciield of Manassas. A Virginian who
visited the museum recognized the sa-
Der as one that had been used by a giant
Virginia cavalryman in "Jeb" Stuart's
command. "The cavalryman in ques-
ton, said the Virginian, twas nearly
seven feet high and broad in proportion.
He had that big saber made by a cross
roads horseshocr, and promised to hew
his way through the Yankee lines with
It and enter Washington, but, poor fell
low, he was shot at Manassas before he
could carry out his rash purpose.
A short time since gentleman who
lived in small town not far from Buff
falo went the way of all flesh, and the
burial ceremonies to be performed over
his remains were committed to the care
Of local undertaken. The funeral was
quite an important one, for the gentle
man was prominent in his own town,
and number of his friends from the
city were present, The services were
held in the church, but just as the time
arrived for taking the remains to the
cemetery severe thunder storm came
up, and it was considered best not 10
start until the worst of the storm was
over. The wait was rather an cmbar-
RAISING one, but the undertaken was
equal to the emergency. Standing on
the chancel steps, he shouted so MS to be
heard in the choir loft ut the other end
Of the building: "The organist will