davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28

Daily except Sunday.
Connect at Marquette with the Marquette,
Houghton a Ontonagon r. r.. for points in Wiscon-
sin and the Copper country. connect with Tri-
weekly stage for Manistique. Tri-weekly stage
for Grand Marais. Daily stage for Sault Ste
Marie. S Express trains Nos. and make close
connections with night trains from and TO all East
ern and Canadian points, on both Michigan Central
and Grand Rapids Indiana railroads.
No trains run south from Mackinac City satur-
day nights No trains run north 10 Mackinac City
Monday mornings.
A. WATSON, r. w. ALLEN,
Gen'l Sup't, Gen1 Pass T'k't Agt.
Marquette, Mich. Marquette, Mich.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28

"Here we are, within quarter of
a mile of land % was the joyful cry
ofthe captain ofan ocean steamer to his
grumbling passengers. "Whore
Which way is it?" Anywhere
down there" said the captain, point
ing downward. "The lead gives us 220
fathoms of water; and the land comes
slap up against the brine. ."-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28
WIT AND HUMOR.

"There is one thing Dread" re-
marked Henderson, "and that is a
premature burial" "Don't worry
about that" replied Fogg, "the thing
is impossible. There's no danger of
your being buried too soon. Boston
Transcript.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28

"Say, my friend, where did you get
that black eyc?"
"Fell against (hic) post"
"Ah, my dear sir, | am afraid that
black eye is the trademark of a
drunkard."
"No, shir, faint trademark-nosh'
ing but a postmark. Lynn Union.
A banana skin lay on the grocer's
floor. "What are you doing there p
asked the scales, peeping over the
edge of the counter.
"Oh, I'm lying in wait for the gro
cer."
"Pshaww said the scales; "Pve
been doing that for years. ."-Chicagc
News.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28

Crackle glass, which has become so
fashionable on account Of its effective
and cracked appearance, is produced
by covering one side of piece of plate
glass with thick stratum of hux or
readily fusible glass, mixed with coarse
fragments Of glass. In this condition it
is placed in muille or m open furnace,
where it is strongly heated. AS soon rs
the Aux is melted, and the glass itself
has become red hot, it is removed from
the furnace, and rapidly cooled. The
flux (or fusble glass; under this treat
ment cracks and splits, leaving innu-
merable fine lines Of fracture over its
surface, having much the appearance of
scales or irregular crystals, which cross
and intersect each other in every dircc-
ton, producing very striking and beauti.
full effects when the light falls upon its
surface.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28

"What's that you've got growing
on your face?" inquired Yeast of
Crimsonbeak the other morning.
"Oh, it's swelling of some sort, y
replied the afflicted man.
"Why don't you put some whiskey
on it :"
"What for?"
"Why, to break it"
"Will that break it?"
"Well, l should think so. I've
known whisky to break many a
swell. l."-Yonkers Statesman.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28


Father-"Come right out in the
back yard, my son. I'll make you
see stars"
Son-"Are you going to make an
American flag, father ?"
Father-"What do you mean, you
young rascal?"
Son-"Why, I'm going to provide
the stars while you furnish the
stripes"
Father failing on his neck -
Where did you inherit this brilliancy
Of with your coat, son. l must save
you or perish in the attempt. ."-Phila-
delphia Call.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28

A boy who needs three-quarters OF
an hour to dress in the morning can
dress in three minutes in the middle
of the night if he hears fre-alarm
bell. This peculiar effect of the mind
ON the body is commended to the
Concord school.-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28

"Any quails about this neighbor-
hood ?" inquired tourist as he was
about to register at Lake George
hotel.
EQUALS" said the proprietor with
an indulgent smile, "they have got to
be nuisance. The cook complains
that he can't throw a piece of refuse
toast out of the back window but
what four or five fat quails fight to
see which one will lie down on it.
Here, Fort, show this gentleman to
parlor A."-Star.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28
JAMES EARINS, NJ. ID.

james Eakins, Physician, Surgeon and Ac-
coucheur, Graduate of Toronto University College,
Toronto, Ontario. Residence: Mrs. Vandusen's,
first house west of Episcopal church,, Washington
Ave, Alpena, Mich. Office: Bostwick's Drug Store.
772-m6.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28

A German engineer is reported TO bo
the inventor of an improved construc-
tion of steam engine, the peculiar
feature OF which consists in the dead
centre point being obyiatcd In this
arrangement block is secured to tho
piston rod, this block being provided
with diagonal slot, through which the
crank pin passes. The slot has concave
edges facing each other, and is provided
with recess at each end. The slide
valve is attached to rod provided at
the lower ends with tappets, against
which the ends of the sliding block
strike, thus reciprocating the slide
valve rod. The levers from which the
rods ore suspended ore provided with
spring arms for giving the desired
degree OF expansion.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28

Intending Settler-"There seems to
be great deal of drunkenness here"
Agent (frankly)-"Yes there is. The
boys love their booze" Intending
settler-"Did you ever try local op-
tionS" Agent-"I never did. New
England rum and applejack is plenty
strong enough for us, mister. ."-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28

A new company has been formed for
the extension by submarine cables OF
telegraphic communication on the west
coast of Africa, ;.nd by means of exist.
ing cables with Europe. The existing
lines are those Of the Spanish National
Telegraph Company to the Canary
Islands and Cadiz and of the Brazilian
Submarine Company at the Cape Verde
Islands to Cadz, providing alternative
routes. The length Of tho cables which
will require TO be laid is 5000 nautical
miles, and they will be laid for the
most part in water Of moderate depth,
where they can be easily repaired II
interrupted The contractors for the
manufacture and laying these cables
Gncluding those already laid) and equip
ping the stations are tho India-rubber,
Gutta Percha and Telegraph Works
Company. The price being G500. 900,
certain French and Portuguese guaran-
tees have been arranged. Y
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28

What are you waiting for, little
boyH' inquired kindly old gentle
man of street urcbin who was
watching each passer-by intently.
"Waitin' for a long-whiskered gent
smokin' a cigar. Then I'll foller
him an get the stub"
"Do long-whiskered men smoke
better cigars ?"
"Naw, but dey don't smoke 'em so
short" t."-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28

1t often happens that chimneys aro
now built round, without corners to
rctard tho draught. This is done by
inserting il the chimney, as tho build
ing progresses, cores consisting of iron
pipes cast in sections, or tile piping
Air spaces are thus left between the
core of the chimney and tho outer wall,
and OF course tho air in this space
becomes heated to high temperature.
1t is quite practicable to utilize this air
for heating purposes, if this is found
desirable. The ar spaces being closed
at the top, and openings being made to
the open air at the base of the chimney,
tin piping is connected with the spaces
for conducting the heat to different
parts Of the factory. or course, this
method is not designed for heating the
stories nearest the ground, rs the cur
rent Of dir in ascending has not had
sufficient exposure to become heated
until it has reached the third or fourth
story OF the building. :,
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28
MICHIGAN CENTRAL

The Niagara Falls Route.
Arrival and departure of trains noted below IA
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28

Those in charge of the Harvard Oh.
servNtory are engaged in making o
systematic Photographic reproduction
of the stellar sky. A tract of the
heavens 10" square is photographed at
single exposure, and stars as small as
the sixth magnitude are clearly shown.
Eighteen of these impressions ore taken
on Qngle plate, forminga map cover
ing section of the heavens 900 long by
45s wide. Stars down to tho eight
magnitude are shown in photographs Of
smaller areas.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28
Scientific


To keep silver-plated articles bright
dip the articles occasionally in solu-
ton Of hyposulphide Of soda Large
articles. like pitchers and salvers.
should be wiped off with rag dipped
in the solution and dried with soft
towel. BY rubbing with piece Of
chamois leather they will be as bright
as new.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28
Hats that Formerly Sold at

Hats that Formerly Sold at
3 dollars, now 1.5O
$275 1.25.
$3.50, 1.
dollars, rs cents.
S1.50, 20
dollar 60 cents.
70 cents, 40 cents.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-28
JVM. II. MAIDEN, NJ. ID.

Physician, Surgeon, GynecoloSst, Etc.,
Late Asst. Surgeon U. s. Army; Examining, sur
geon for u S. Pensioners and all the principal Lille
Insurance Co.'s Residence and oihce on eecohu
ST., nearly opposite the Union House.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1886-10-25
THE LIME-KILN CLUB.

When the lights had been turned
up strong, and Elder Toots had
coughed a peanut shuck out of his
throat, Brother Gardner rose and
said:
81 find on my desk heap of mot
toes, watchwords, and maxims which
hev been gathered together by the
committee on Judiciary wild view
of replacin' de stock now hangin' on
de walls. | has been keerfully con-
siderln' de matter in my mind fur
week pas, an l doan' like de ideah
of change. De pusson who can't
stick to one motto fur mo- dan six
months can't be depended on to stick
by job fur mo- dan one.
"If | was out O. cash, friendless,
laid up in a garret wild sore heel an
a carbuncle, an spectin' ebery day
to be toted off to de poo house, |
doan' know but | might furnish de
world wild some watchwords an say
ms, but it would have to be under
sich circumstances. Some time ago
| begun tradin' wild a butcher who
had hung up in his shop de motto ::
Live and Let Llve.' 1t struck me
that de ideah was good one. He
wanted his dues an he would
grant de same to odders. In about
a week he slipped plugged quarter
into my change; two days later my
two pounds of beef was short three
ounces de mex week he charged me
wild 48 cents Wort of pork which [
nebber had. / doan' trade dere any
mo-, an my respeck for his motto
has dropped fifteen pegs.
GA naybur O. mine took in a mot
bout var ago. 1t was: DE airly
burd cotches de worm In leetle
time I missed my hoe. Den de buck
saw went. Den odder nayburs' loos
property began to go. We got a
policeman up dar' to watch. and
when he caught de thief it proved to
be de man wild de motto. He was
de airliest burd on dat hull street,
an de way he took in de worms was
sad fur us"
eff dar am any members of dis
club who can't keep to work widout
some motto bout industry behind
'em-who can't pay deir honest debts
widout some motto bout honesty
above 'em-who can't be good hus-
bands an fathers wldout some scrip
tural quotashan pasted in DER hats,
such pussons had better sever DER
connexun at once. ."-Detrou F1ee
Press.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1886-10-25
THE MOTHER GAVE AN
OBJECT LESSON.

A lady overheard her nurse girl
talking to the little child she was
putting to sleep, and among the le-
gends of the nursery in which she in
dulged was this; 'If you don't 90
right to sleep this very minute,
great, big, awful black bear, with
eyes like Goals of fire and sharp,
white, cruel teeth, will come out from
under the bed and e-a-t-y-o-u-a-l-l-
u-p!" The poor little thing nestled
down under the clothes to dream of
horrible bears eating her up.
That night, when the stolid nurse
had composed herself in her own
comfortable bed and had put the
lamp out, there came a sudden rap
at the door and the voice of the mis-
tress called loudly through the pam
els: maggie! Maggie! get up as
quick as you can. There's burglar
under your bed p AT the word
"burglar' the girl sprang screaming
from the bed. tole open the door
and fell into Mysteries in the hall.
The lesson was more instructive than
the mistress designed, but when the
oirPS fears had calmed sEa Said to
her: sYou did not hesitate to tell
my little, delicate child, who could
not possibly know that it was lie,
a cruel story of bear under her
bed =; now, when 1 treat you to the
same kind of story you are nearly
frightened to death. Tomorrow
you can 60 into the kitchen and work
there you are not fit to care for little
childran
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1886-10-25
AN ANECDOTE OF HENRY
WILSON.

Henry Wilson was self-controlled
as well as self-made man. In view
of the hateful shadow of intemper-
ance which hung over his childhood's
home, there is something pathetic
and grand in his fidelity to the pledge
of his youth never to touch intoxicat-
ing drinks.
In his early shoemaker days at
Natick he was sent by his townsmen
to Washington as bearer of remon-
STRANGE to John Quincy Adams for
presentation TO the house. Mr.. Ad-
ans was pleased with the handsome,
manly young fellow, as well as with
his mission, and he invited him to
dinner party, where young Wilson
met some of the great men of the na-
tion. He was asked to drink wine.
The temptation to lay aside his tenn
perance principles for moment, in
order not to seem singular, was a
strong one; but he resisted it, and
declined the glass of wine, and, as
he related the story TO me in after
years, be added that his trembling
heart was made glad and strong
when Mr.. Adams, in the presence Of
the company, commended him for
his adherence to his convictions, and
afterwards manifested genuine
frlendliness by frequent invitations
to his home, and in many ways aid
ing to make his visit to Washington
agreeable.
After Mr.. Wilson's first election
to the United States senate he gave
his friends a dinner at noted Bos-
ton hotel. The table was set with
not one wine glass upon it.
"Where are the glasses?" asked
several of the guests loud enough to
remind their host that they did not
like sitting down to a wineless din
ner.
"Gentlemen,' said Mr.. Wilson,
rising and speaking with great deal
of feeling, ''you know my friendship
for you and my obligations to you.
Great as they are, they are not great
enough to make me forget 'the rock
from whence 1 was hewn and the pit
from whence | was dug Some of
you know how the curse of intemper-
ance overshadowed my youth. That
might escape fed from my early
surroundings. For what I am l am
indebted, under God, to my temper
ance VOW and my adherence to it.
Call for what you want to eat, and,
if this hotel can provide it, it shall
be Forthcoming but wines and liq-
uors cannot come to this table with
out my consent, because | will not
spread in the paths of another the
sneres from which l escaped"
Three rousing cheers showed the
brave senator that men admired the
man who has the courage of his con-
victions.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1886-10-25

'sYou've got black eye, Pat How did
you get it?" Pat-Home Rule, sr!"
1t makes very little difference how ho
tel napkin is folded. The query with the
guest is, who used it last.
"Why do you eat flag-root?" 'Because
am patriotic" ooh, l see, you are al
ways drinking to the health of your coun-
try
Wealth is an enemy to self-rellance and
industry. AS soon as a man gets Il canoe
he wants to get somebody to paddle it
for him.
An Ohio woman went to bed one night
and woke up the next morning to find her
jaw dislocated. 1t is supposed that she
got to talking in her sleep.
Some hogs in brewery in Portsmouth,
N. H., are in the habit of getting drunk
just like men, and they are no longer ad-
mitted into good hog society.
'They say that elephants have very
| good memories" eyes, they can always
| remember what is in their trunks. That
is more than the girls can do
dealer advertises ''Lightning Fruit
Jars" They may be new brand. but
for Tightening ruit jars there is nothing
more successful than a small boy and SOL
itude.
In the estaurant-Garcon, are you
sure that the fish is fresh? Garcon-Ah,
monsieur, Of that it is impossible for me
to say; have only been in the place a
week.
Wife: "What do you think, my dear?
That young Mrs. De Hobson actually
snubbed me last night Husband: ''Is
it possible? What did you do?" Wife
81 snubbed old Mrs. Jenkins
sWhats the price of sausages?" ''Dwen-
ty cents a bound" ''You asked twenty
five this morning." Eyes; dot vas ven 1
had some. Now 1 amt got none sells
for dwenty cends. Dot makes me a re-
butation for selling cheap, und I don't
lose holdings"
Two ladies were cOnversing on the
qualities and demerits of their own fair
sex. Said one, with twinkle in her
beautiful eyes, II have never known but
two women who were really perfect.
"Who was the other?" asked her compan=
ion, with smile on her thin face.
If it wasn't fer one thing, boys, said an
old farmer, as he got down from his wag-
on, I'd bet amy mount O. money on that
bay colt O. mine trottin' a mile in 2:16.
I'd bet million dollars if had it. The
one thing? asked one of the crowd. The
distance is too far for the time.
Gentlemen, he said to the reporters, as
the sheriff put the knot where it would
do the most good, will you grant me one
request before die? The reporters to a
man, said they would. Then write me
down as having been simply hanged, not
launched into eternity; I'm no dude
This request caused some CONSERVATION
among the reporters, but they all kept
their word.
'sYes," said Kentuckian, who had
been in the far West, s'Indians are power.
ful fond of whiskey. Let em once get
: the taste of whiskey, an they'll give ur
everything for it; An old chief out in
: western Dakota offered me pony, sad
die, bride, blanket, and / don't know
j what else, for pint of whiskey 1 hat
with me-" "And you wouldn't give it tt
him?" "Not much! That was the las
, pint had left. But it shows how font
Indians are of whiskey''
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1886-10-25
LIFE THOUGHTS.

The parent who does not teach his
child trade, teaches him to be thief.
Whatever may be the authority of
custom, wise man makes himself
independent of usages which are
impediments TO his best activity.
Shakespeare is as much out of the
category of eminent authors as he is
out of the crowd. He is inconceiva-
bly, wise; the others, conceivably.
A beautiful folm is better than a
beautiful face; beautiful behavior
is better than beautiful form; it
gives a higher pleasure than statues
or pictures it is the finest of the fine
arts.
Indeed, what mortal is there of us,
who would find his satisfaction en-
HANGED by an opportunity of compar-
ing the picture he presents to him.
self of his own doings, with the pic
ture they make on the mental retina
of his neighbors.
Shallow men believe in luck, be-
lieve in circumstances 1t was some
body's name, or he happened to be
there at the time, or it was so then,
and another day it would have been
otherwise. Strong men believe in
cause and effect.
Conscience will sometimes let a
gentleman doZe; but after discovery
has come, and opened your curtains,
and SAID, "You desired to be called
early!" there's little use in trying to
sleep much.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1886-10-25
The Weight ofa Word.

Have you ever thought of the weight ofa word
That falls on the like the hum of a bird,
That gladdens the springtime of memory and
youth
And garands with cedar the banner of Truth,
That moistens the harvesting spot of the brain
Like dewdrope that fall on a meadow of grain,
Or that shrivels the germ and destroys the fruit
And lies like worm at the lifeless root?
1 saw farmer at break of day
Hoeing his corn in careful way;
An enemy came with drought in his eye,
Discouraged the worker and hurried by.
The keen-edged blade of the faithful hoe
Dulled on the earth in the long corn row;
The weeds sprung up and their feathers tossed
Over the field and the crop was-lost.
A sailor launched on an angry bay
When the heavens entombed the face of the day;
The wind arose like a beast in pain,
And shook on the billows his yellow name;
The storm beat down as if cursed the cloud,
And the waves held up dripping shroud-
But bark? DER the waters that wildly raved
Came a word of cheer, and he was-saved.
A poet passed with a song of God
Hid in his heart like gem in clod.
His lips were framed to pronounce the thought,
And the music of rhythm its magic wrought;
Feeble at first the happy tril,
Low was the echo that answered the hill,
But jealous friend spoke near his side,
And on his lips the sweet song-ded.
A woman paused where chandelier
Threw in the darkness its poisoned spear;
Weary and footsore from iourneying long,
She had strayed unawares from the right to the
wrong.
Angels were beck ming her back from the den,
He'll and its demons were beck'niug her in;
The tone of an urchin, like one who forgives,
Drew her back, and in heaven the sweet word
lives.
Words! Words! They are little, yet mighty and
brave;
They rescue a nation, an empire save
They close up the gaps in fresh bleeding heart
That sickness and sorrow have severed apart.
They fall on the path, like ray of the sun,
Where the shadows of death lay so heavy upon;
They tighten the earth over our blessed dead.
A word that will comfort, oh leave not unsaid.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1886-10-25
Autumn Fashions.

The Maple owned that she was tired of always wear
ing green,
She knew that she had grown of late, too shabby
to be seen
The Oak and Beech and Chestnut then deplored
their shabbiness,
And ALL except the Hemlock sad, were wild to
change their dress.
"For fashion-plates wen take the fowers,' the
rusting Maple said,
"And like the Tulip, I'll be clothed in splendid
gold and red!'
"The cheerful Sunfower suits me best" the light
some Beech replied;
"The Marigold my choice shall be"-the. Chestnut
spoke with pride.
The sturdy Oak took time to think-"I hate such
garing hues;
The Gillyfower, so dark and rich, fer my model
choose"
So every tree in all the grove except the Hemlock
sad,
According to its wish ere long in brilliant dress
clad.
And here they stand through all the soft and bright
October days;
They wish to be like fowers-indeed, they look
like huge bouquets!