Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1886-07-18
PECK's BAD BOY.
prcIss sun.

Get out of this store, and don't ever ie'
me- Gee Won here again." said the grocery
man as the bad boy came in, after laying
a dead cat on barrel outside the grocely.
81 thought you had reformed, put tne
minister tells me you played trick on
your father in the street car the other gay
that nearly caused him to be murdered.
What was it that exploded, dynamlte
NAV. ii wasn't no dynamite" SAID the
hoy and was no more to blame than you.
II was naxident, that's what it was. get
all the blame for everything. Ii acyciohe
should take pa by the pants, lift nm up
and set him down at Chicago, 1t would De
laid to me- Say, someday you Will near
of me being missing, and the police VIII
null dead body out of the river, ana then
YOU will cry, and he sorry that eVerypouy
abuses me, l shall not stand 1t any long
er " and the boy proceeded to fill hlmseh
with cherries out of box, 50 he couid ole
Oh full stomach.
90 don't take on So" said the grocery
man ~ meant no HARM but the minister
said he was in the street car with you ana
your ma. and he saw you hand your pa q
package and go out on the platform, ana
that soon the package exploded, ana the
contents hit a woman in the nose, ana
some of it went on the minister, and ne
tbinks his clothes are ruined. What on
earth was it, and what did you do II ior:
well, I'll tell you all about II, s.iid
the boy. land if you blame me that settles
il between us. You see pa has been drink
ing some lately. First he took little WINE
IN steady his nerves after the riots, ana
then he GOT in with soldiers who were Gel
ebrating, and filled up, and his head was
getting pretty large, Always when he gets
n drinking, and wants to swear OIL, he mas
IN take some sour, cooling drink, to settle
his stummix. Late years he has used Stunt
ormaqnishy. Ii is sour, Just like lemonade
and pops and fixes like champagne. Ihat
day you,,speak of we started home ana pa
head aked, and he told me to get a bottle
of strife of magnishy, and got II, anu
we got into the car. I had the bottle, and
sat next to pa, and nirish woman sat on
mas other side. Some ladies came in, ana
cot M to give them my seat, and pa SAID,
give me the bottle and ] handed 1t to
him, and, honestly, didn't shake IT at
all know too much to shake bottle OF
strife of magnishy, cause had bottle 90
off in nv hands once and the cork took me
rirbt in the eve; and you bet 1t
bnrt Pa took the hottie and closed his
eyes and was pretty near asleep, ana was
out on the platform. Just as l went out
the minister came in, and he stood right
I'M in front of pa and the Irish woman
Well, | suppose the motion ofthe car shook
the magnishy, and it was all ready TO
,splode Just as pa was getting asleep the
woman reached up 10 pull the strap, and as
she Ierked it, her hand slipped off and her
knuckle ralied pas ear, and pa walked up
and looked mad at the Irish woman, think
ing she had struck him purpus, and he
said to her, Don't strike innocent man,
and I s'pose he must have shook the bottle,
for all of q sudden the cork flew out with
loud noise, and struck the woman right on
the end of the nose, and the magnishy
spurted in her face, Just bilin'.' and she
stranpled and yelled murder, and grabbed
M by the neck and bumped hts head
against the side of the car, and pa turned
the bottle so the rest ofthe magnlshy squit-
ed on the minister, and the minister, who
Is a BAPTIST, and don't believe In sprink-
lin. was mad. and he looked cross at pa,
and the car stopped for the woman to get
out. and she called pa baldheaded old soda
fountain, and asked him why he didn't
carry glasses to drink out of, and some hot
ties of syrup with vanilla flavor, and pa
said it was naxdent, and she was wiping
the sitrit of magnishy out of her neck with
handkerchief, and blowing pa, and a
policeman that was riding with the driver
told the woman 10 hush up, and she got off
the car and shook her fist at the 'ould
soda fountain rs she called pa, and the
car went on, and pa went to sleep with
the empty bottle in his arms"
Say, what want to know rs did you
laugh when the hottie exploded" asked
the groceryman, interrupting the boy
Your innocence depends upon whether
You laughed"
well, laffed, but had TO or die"
said the hoy. when saw that magnishy
following that cork into the woman's face
and down her neck, and into her ear, and
saw the expression of indignation on her
face when she got so she could breathe, and
saw the look of helpless innocence and as
constituent OIL pas face, as he seemed to
wonder what had gone wrong while he was
asleep, | could not help laughing if the
world had como 10 an end in minute"
"Well, You are acquitted by the jury"
said the groceryman, ''but don't ever let ii
occur again" The boy promised faithfully
that it shouldn't and went away, while
the groccryman threw the dead cat over
into neighbours yard, and charged four
quarts of cherries TO the had boys pa.