The Universalist. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1884-1897, 1886-10-09


an example thatll upset everythin' in the
Hollow; but lawful heart, everythin' is
upset, anyhow, an gals come up enough
to make your hair stand on end, an next
thing therell be hammock in every front
door yard!"
1t was Phoebe Ann LOOMS, the Dress
maker, with whom this conversation was
proceeding, Miss Loomis's part consist
ing in nod here and there as the tide of
words flowed on; but now another per-
son appeared on the scene-the wife of
boarders found such comfort as interior
New England theories OF beds and OF diet
afforded. These theories we're altering
slowly, as the boarders persistently put
the feather bed at the bottom and the
husk one on top, and demanded berries
in their natural state, and not as the con-
tents of pie.
It'd save half the work, il folks was
all your mind" the gaunt and bent and
forlorn little woman had said meditative-
ly, "but the men folks wouldn't stand it
minute. They must have their pie, an
I'm willin' they should. What I was
goin' to say was, that 1 don't see how
anythin' ever gets done if you city folks
lie round to home the way you do here"
There had been no time to answer
then, for sudden call whisked her away;
but an hour or two later the owner of the
hammock returned from walk, saw her,
after wrestle with the treacherous edge,
settle into it's depths with furtive look
about, and struggle out after fifteen min
utes' motionless quiet, with look of
profound surprise on her face. There
was no opportunity for comment then,
but it came when the evening dish wash
ing and milk straining was over, and the
bosrder had come in for a lamp.
"I was bound to try the hammock"
Mrs. Slocum said hesitatingly, can I
worried into it. The gettin' in an out is
good deal of chore, but I never got
so much rest out O. fifteen minutes be-
fore. I was thinkin' would like one
somewhere where 1 could get in without
bein' seen, if it wasn't but for five min
utes. I suppose they cost sight?"
"Mine was dollar and half, but 1
could have bought a good one for ninety
eight CENTS" the boarder on swered, +" and
the staples for five cents each. Out-of-
doors is what you need, standing over
the stove as you do, but I have one
in my bed room at home. 1t does not
heat, and so still more exhaust tired
back, but gives perfect, yet yielding,
support to every inch of the body. I
want to prescribe them to every worker,
and believe that, nine times out of ten,
they will do more for worn out woman
than any medicine or DOCTOR"
There followed a long talk, for which
there is no space here. Another ham
mock came within few days, by mail,
and was slung between two apple trees
at the back of the house, and to the in
dignant surprise of two or three ener-
getic neighbors Mrs. Slocum occupied it
morning and afternoon. Old lady Pear
sail, the rug maker, who kept sharp
eye on her neighbor, had seized her op-
portunity at last, and poured out to Miss
Phoebe Ann her views of people who had
nothing better to do than lie on their
backs; and it was at this juncture that
little Mrs. Slocum laid down her dish
cloth and appeared in the front room.
"You calkilated I'd hear, suppose"
she said, "an' there's just this to be said.
We've all come up with the notion that
there's somethin' disgraceful in lynn down
daytimes. We're all willin' enough to
take pills an bitters an every kind O. herb
tea, but that there's any good in solid
rest never enters anybody's head. Now
I've ciphered it out. There's empty Bit
ter bottles in the shed chamber by the
dozen, an all the good they do is to sort
O nerve me up an hour or two, an then
let me down for the rest of the day. I'm
coming round to see some sense in nat
raj ways O dom things, an when you
find out all at once that half an hours
quiet in the air an sun sets you up
more'n bitters, I say its wickedness not
to take it; an what's more, I'm goin' to
preach it to every woman in the Hollow
that amt afraid of what folks'll say. It's
cheap, an it's easy. The men folks'll pay
for bitters an never say word; but they
smoker an then they scold, if you're
bound to try somethin' that amt in bot
ties, an can't be. I've come round to it.
I'm against bottles an I am for hammocks,
an anybody that wants to know why, can
jest come an ask, an I'll tell EN-. You've
always been wearin' strengthenin' plas-
tiers, Mis- Pearsall, an for that matter,
you, too, Phoebe Ann, an takin' bitters
like the rest O. us, when what you want
ed was solid rest if it wasn't but ten min
utes to once, an fresh air an sunshine.
It's maxim me over SO far as such rattle
bones ever kin be made over, an faint
too late to preach it, even if 1 haven't
much time to practice. Off with your
plasters, 1 say" and Mrs. Slocum waved
her hand with sudden enthusiasm, "off
with 'eml An when you've tried ham,
mock, it will be time enough to sit up an
say that folks are fools for usin' 'em.
Old lady Pearsall reiterated speechless
with INDIGNATION the boarder epeechless