Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1886-05-20

| llODu uCtSCtiOh w s'AAA>"'S'
One night 1 made up my mind. All!
that night! She had never appeared so
lovely. That white dress and the POM
egranate blossom at her breast can
see now We were walking in the gar
den under the orange trees. How the
scent of those orange buds comes back!
1t was then she told me he had already
asked her to be his wife. If it was her
fathers wish she should marry him.
and her fathers wish was law. She
would not say she loved him. That
she whispered, mo one would ever
know, aye or nay
II left her resolved. If ! could not
get her, at least he never should.
Then set myself to work formu-
lating my plan"
He glanced inquiringly at me to see
the effect of his words. YES, i gave
to it nights and days; the result you
see here" striking his breast, "a man
who has accomplished his purpose and
is now free, free as yourself.
Il must confess it, feared the pun
ishment of the law. The dread OF an
ignomnious death at the hands of an
executoner was a nightmare to me.
To avoid this all my intellect was con-
centrated. The thought came to me
as a flash illumnes the darkness. l
commenced, with zeal desperate
man only can know, the study of in
sanity, its causes, its pathology. |
digestcd Virchow, Pinal and Esquirol.
DR.. Heinrich Schules Handbuch der
Girsteskrankheitcn / devoured, and
Won Zeimssen's works were my daily
pabulum. With Bucknill and luke l
entered the psychological depths, and
Maudsley made my way clear.
read in Prtchard that one of the first
symptoms of this disease was an indif-
ference to social considerations, apathy
and neglect of the personal and other
duties, dislike and suspicion of friends
This was my starting point.
Il will not now weary you with a
scientific description of my course. l
knew insanity was a good defense in
: law and | set myself studiously about
it to become insane, that | might cheat
the law. | wanted to leave no room for
any doubt. | wanted hundreds of wit
nesscs who would be willing to come
forward to testify, when might COM
nit The deed, that my reason was and
had been gone for some time.
"Do not turn away from me like that.
The demon jealousy it was that led me
q on. If did not regret it | would not
i be talking here to you-understand?
t Il commenced cautiously, changed
i my habits of life, gave up my club, took
r apartments in hotel the better to be
q observed, became absent minded, talk
T ed 10 myself. | soon saw that my
e friends observed the change and |
d chuckled. left my Office for days mys-
/ teriously, and as mysteriously, without
q explanation, | walked the streets alone
late at night, and gradually became
% more violent in my temper. disturb
o ed an audience at the thcatcr by loudly
II interrupting the actors, and was eject,
he ed My friends began to talk. smiled
i. at them when alone. What stupid
n idiots! They recommended medical adj,
le vice and that gentle old DR.. Harvey
a visited me. Poor old man, he was ;
g child in my hands. His questions
ID answered evasively, and gave him sui
l. ficient evidence to set his poor heaC
e. shaking ominously. He felt my pulse
II He did not know | had accelerated it
Il, speed by violent exercise moment be
at fore his visit. He said my system wa!
w out of order, my brain needed rest
IN But tire you. For four months l pur
10 sued my systematic course, growing
We slowly and slowly more violent.
III overheard a conversation between SOM
r old friends, in which it was suggested
that it would soon become their duty t.
ar confine me in some asylum. That sat
sfied me. | had reached the prope
al point. Then | armed myself and wait
e, ed. In the open street, ut MONDAY
ly was the time. Madmen do not seek t.
ne conceal their deeds, so | took the open
a bold course. Understand?'
nd His eyes were flashing now and hi
as fingers worked convulsively. II me
nd him at the Post Office. With lou
ne laugh pointed toward him, called hir
as my brother from Hindostan. TIL
". crowd looked surprised and laughed.
'p- told them he was wild animal; to kee
lp- L. 1nn1ynI nctnniShnl Inn
ng founded. depressed great fear of hin
IT, and then"
He had risen, and was gazing out il
led to the moonlight The water washe
me and splashed, trickled and dripped O
OF the timbers below. The guitar was sti
tinkling inshore. Then l fired
I'VE fired! Understand?
are MY God, in all my months of r
hat hearsal, all my course of cruel stud
ld' l had not once thought of it. When
too saw his body on the sidewalk, it can
MT to me like stroke of lightning. A
md this did not give her to me! This h;
nts never entered my brain. He was gon
and so was my love. She would new
lhe look upon me again. My brain reele
vas and | awoke in the old Jail, and tn
see were holding the inquest in the va
his below.
val 1.-THE trial you know of. Everybo
his said | was insane-the doctors, t
papers, everybody. l was acquitte
our and my friends escorted me to an a
lit lum. / had cheated the law, but n
on my conscience. Understand! In fl
his months / was discharged as cur
man. Rest, they said, was what W
we needed, and that restored my reasc
? l Poor fools.
wed "You are the first to whom / ha
He told this, the very first. What ca
inst do-what can | do-to win back
lose love her love-I so cruelty dashed
the the earth? That is what / wanted
the ask you, only that" He paced to a
one fro neryously, claspinp his hands to