The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1886-09-08
A Ball and Earthquake at
GIcnnS.

HiSlt ecnoeu the ballroom
hall of Gems, the merry laughter
of happy youth, and as the evening
advanced, the many slippered feet
of Cardinals fairest daughters and
bravest men kept time in perfect
unison with the dance music dis
coursed by the band. Half-past
nine struck a little too quickly.
Fright hand acrOssw on they
danced, and many n soft eve beam
ed as a gallant form would fit
quickly by in the dance. Suddenly
your correspondent found himself
gently flung down by some I'M
known power, and at first he
thought he had been drinking
water-a few moments before, hut
when he looked around, what did
he see but the musicians wildly
deserving their stand and the floor
rocking like a ship. He noticed
that his partner, a beautiful golden
haired maiden, was going out on
the run, followed by a great chain
OF young couples. Your CORES
pendent thought he'd hesitate no
longer, and permit her to II out
without an escort SO he bracpd up
and tried to he her escort as She
seemed to he in the lead. 1t was
no use trying to catch her, She
cOuldn't stop if she wanted to, for
she was propelled forward by the
crowd behind, so your correspond
ent, Knowing he would be the last
one out, concluded to walk, which
he did. The hotel was now shiver-
ing like IL ship at sea, ladies ana
gentlemen were rushing down
stairs as if they were trying to
catch Il train, Misses ran out Wild
~ ~shrieking fire, and old ladies be-
ing hravcly assisted out by gallant
old gentlemen. Such Il sccnc Your
reporter never witnessed before.
Such Il large number of Mother
Hubbards, displayed i" such short
notice, would have nllcd 4 trunk.
such etfectionate young ladics
were never seen before. They
chung to their partners arm with
a look which said, "naught but
death al part U.S." and MANY an
eye was dim which an hour before
blushed at the praise of their own
loneliness. Daisies, lilies, roses
and all the flowers that bloom in
the spring-tra-la! were strewn
around in confusion over the car
peted turf. A Citadel cadet ran in
and got a bucket of water for the
ladies who were fainting and
screaming along the lawn. A ne
gro who was drinking water at the
Spring, didn't stop to say a word,
but took a dive into the water, and
and his feet cut all the motions of
a Mobile dancing master. He was
Immediately fl he'd out, but he
drank enough in that time to last
him all winter, and not counting
his bath. Baths in the spring
should be fifty cents extra.
Shortly after the quaking had
stopped, the people began to slowly
march into the Hotel, and soon
such Il scene was gathered in the
corridors that would have been a
picture for an invalid's eye. Sit
ting on benches, being framed by
excited youths, were young ladies
who were as pale as as moonlight
and as docilc and afectionate as
could be. Sitting on v~aliseS, etc,
were youngsters, who lately reused
from their sleep, passed the hours
IN nibbling peanuts. In a decided
military position, was a cadet try
ing to keep from smiling as he
muttered the following to his cous-
in: You are my favOrite pine APP
pie juice, you not made for
this earth, you were made for a God;
| am II God, you were made for me,n
and as he saw her turning pale,
said: sit was only a little earth
quake" which your correspondent
thought was encouraging. About
n O'Clock, the parties began run
ming out again. This time a man
jumped from the gallery and hurt
himself. We look ed for the young
cadet. He promised a coat-tail to
his young partner, and promised
that she would be the second one
out, as he'd be the first, but he was
asleep, dreaming about plum-Dud-
ding, bacon and the hard biscuits
that announces the sad fact to hi4
sweetheart that school has begun"
Few hotels can furnish earth
quakes and hops on the same night.
Let the genial prOprictors charge
always cXtr for earthquakes, tor
nadocS, cyclones and dude. Such
is the advice of onc who thought
he knew what a nice time was
He thought he knew, but he didn't.
He knows now. Ifthe kind reader
should like to experience an earth
quake, let him just accuse his
mother-in-law of being ugly. He
will Then experience, i'm all IT'S force,
in all its tcrrorS, an earthuuake,
but not quite equal to that Of
Glenn's
LUZY.