The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-04-23
A WORD ABOUT rouaHs.

stoughs.n The REGISTER wishes
to congratulate them on the progress
they have made and felicitate them on
the bright future that awaits them if
they only persevere in the line of their
present ambition. Already q number
of them have succeeded in attracting
many admiring Chances by the free and
easy, devil-may-care way in which
they hang a broad brimmed hat on
their left ear. All of them can smoke
cigarettes with bewitching grace,
while some have progressed as far as
.'two.fers" and others have even as
pired to short stemmed pipe. Sever.
al of the more highly advanced have
plastered tobacco Juice on plate glass
windows as an evidence of their pro.
ficiency in the line of mastication. All
of them have long ago gotten over the
weak and puerile idea that man who
is going 10 be tough ought to
60 to school; while the idea of their at
tending Sunday School is so preposter-
GUS as to deserve nothing but their
boisterous and contemptuous laughter.
Some of the younger ones have found it
rather difficult to learn to swear with a
big enough 3D." but with constant
practice and with the stimulating ex-
ample of the older ones always before
them this difficulty will soon be over
come. In short with the fine begin
ming they have already made we see
no reason why these boys should not
advance rapidly to the full measure of
their ambition. They will find it easy
after awhile to carry a fiat bottle along
with the pipe and tobacco; and they
will find that an occasional game of
cards with a greater or less "ante" will
aid immensely in increasing the fluency
of their profanity. And when these
things are acquired there will be little
else needed. They will be greatly
pleased to note how carefully and re-
specially ladies step aside to give
them plenty of room on the side walk,
and they can see by their looks that
these ladies are inwardly wishing that
their sons might grow up to he fine, in
dependent, self-reliant "toughs." And
it will not be long until they receive
other evidences of the admiration and
affection of the entire community. 1t
will frequently happen that the city
marshal, instead of allowing them to
provide a bed for themselves as COM
mon citizens are compelled to do, will
find them lodgings at the public ex-
pense and will even take particular
pains to see that their bed rooms are SO
guarded as to secure them against i'm
pertinent intrusion. Some of them
may even find that, rather than have
such distinguished citizens reduced to
the mean necessity of earning their
own living, the community, through
courts especially organized for the pur-
pose, will ask the State to provide en-
tertainment for them for a greater or
less number of years. AS they grow
older they will find it pleasanter to
to travel. And they will not be COM
PEELED to put up at hotels and bear
their own expenses, as other people do,
but will be entertained at private
houses. And nobody will think Of
asking them to pay anything, for ev-
cry one can see at glance that they
are "toughs." They may have to walk
sometimes, but as rule the authori-
ties of one town, out of consideration
for their distinguished character, will
present them with a railroad ticket to
the next town. And after this has
gone on awhile they will lie down in a
door way some night or on the soft side
ola gutter and 60 to sleep. And in
the morning somebody will find them
and carefully take them away without
waking them, and put them in a hole
and fill up the hole. Then somebody
else will put board over them and
write on the board HE Was A Tough"
A brilliant career, truly, and q glori-
GUS destiny. The REGISTER renews
its congratulations.
ANSWERS 10 CORRESPONDENTS.
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