St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1886-05-02
THE LADY RAMBLER
Relates a Fable Of the Youth and the
Crazy u uilt.


There was once young man, so runs the
tradition. who was exceedingly DESTROYS of
taking unto himself wife. Young women
of marriagable age were just as plenty then
as now and Only waited to be asked, but
this youth was possessed of wisdom beyond
his years. He wanted true help-mate,
who would share his griefs as well as his
joys and who would not tear around and
make things lively every time he refused to
buy her spring bonnet or camel's hair
shawl. Well, he haunted the gilded halls
OF fashion; ne went to o'clock teas and
lawn tennis parties; he rode
and walked, and drove, and
talked and danced with scores of beauteous
maidens, but he couldn't make up his mind
which to choose; they all were agreeable,
most of them seemed amiable; but he was
sure OF none. The poor fellow actually
lost sleep over the matter: although it is
not recorded that his appetite failed. At
last. in perfect despair. he repaired to his
godmother, who, as all godmOthers should
be, was something Of fairy. What passed
between the two l know not, but the young
man came forth from the conference with
a smiling face, and the next morning
mounted his roam Steed and set gaily
out He rode through all the country side,
and whenever he came to picturesque
farmhouse he stopped to ask for glass of
milk or for permission to water his horse;
and if a pretty girl answered his summons
(for it is notable fact that all the virtues
in the world have no attraction for man
if they are welded to ugliness) he took oc-
casion to inform her that the peculiar
giossiness of his roan's coat was due to a
diet composed largely of raw bread-dough,
and besOught her, as a great favor, to
preserve for him the scrapings from
her kneading-board when she next
prepared the staff of life
And the youth being gallant and handsome
(while history does not distinctly affirm
that he chucked the pretty lassies under
their dimpled chins, it certainly does not
deny that he pinched their rosy cheeks) the
damsels one and all fell dead in love with
him, and were perfectly willing to do any
thing whereby they might gain his esteem.
SO. when baking day came round, if the
roam steed was as fond of dough as his mas
ter said, how delighted it must have been,
for the dear girls appeared with baskets
and buckets and pans of scrapingS, and
really wonder that there was
any bread left for the families
of the infatuated females. At every
doorstep the contributions were larger than
the last. till the youth began to think he
was lii for it, but he thanked them ali and
every mothers daughter was quite sure
that she must be the favored one so i'm
partially did he bestow his gracious
smilest. But at last he came to one little
house, and no one appeared to meet him.
He dismounted and passing through the
trim garden knocked at the door, young
lady appeared. plainly dressed indeed, but
more beautiful than any one he had ever
imagined. Struck with her appearance, it
was some time before he could find
words, but at length made known his er-
rand. ''Ah, gentle sir" was the soft re-
ply, gladly would serve you, but when
l have finished kneading MY bread have
no dough left; every morsel and each
grain of flour is worked into my loaf"
Then was the heart of the youth glad, for
he knew this was she of whom his god
mother had spoken, and he thereupon
made an offer of his heart and hand, which
was Immediately accepted and the we'd
ding came off as soon as the license could
be procured
%xw
Now, George Augustus, a nice young
man well-known in this goodly city of ours,
had heard this tradition in his childhood's
days and had pondered over and admired
the conduct of the master of the roam
steed; and when he one day concluded that
it was time for him to marry and settle
down, he resolved to follow that bright and
shining example, and thoroughly test the
young ladies of his acquaintance before
making his final choice. Of course he
knew that modern conventionality would
never permit him to go from house to house
begging the refuse of the baking pans. even
| if the modern young lady did do
the family baking, which she doesn't; but
being youth, thoughtful and full of expes
dients he soon hit upon plan. The girl
were all making crazy quilts at that time;
he himself had given away not only his old
neckties, but also his new ones, and had
sacrificed the Innings of his vests and coat
sleeves for the qualification of avaricious
females. He therefore wrote a little note
to every young woman he knew. informing
them that he pinned for crazy quilt, and
asking each of them to send him one
block. Well, as 1 told you, George
A. was catch, and the sweet
girls just spread themselves over those bits
of patchwork. His female relations who
were allowed peep at the fast accumulat-
ing pile went into ecstasies over the exoui-
site materials and the beautiful workman