The Washington critic., 1886-06-21
GENERAL AND cRrrIoULAR.


The following lines were discovered in a
Washington girls autograph album over
the signature OF Senator Jones OF Florida:
Love is q curious thing,
Which cometh from above
And lighteth like dove
On some
And some IL never hlts,
But that II scatters all their wits
And gives them particular fits:
Oh, huml
A certain distinguished U. 3. Senator on
one occasion was in Calcutta on tour
around the world, and among the places
visited was the English cemetery. There
were many noted Englishmen buried there,
aud such names as George Gordon, Bart (;
Henry Troyelyan, Bart, were so numerous
as TO attract the Senator's attention. Finally
be said;
"My, my; this Bart family must be large
and influential one. / remember to have
seen the name In London, but had no idea
they were such prominent people. Really,
when go back TO England l mast look
them mp and get better acquainted"
From Tales OF The Executive Session.
"l have eaten bean,n says Governor Hill,
"ln cultured old Boston town,
Aud I'm so sweled up, IL makes me feel
Like man of great renown.
oh the bean, the bean,
The Boston bean
Ia the swellest fruit
I've ever seen.h
"Thcy loved me In Boston, with love intense,
4 love TO throb and to thrill,
Bocnusc from my name, they know had
Descended from Bunker Hill.
oh the bean, the bean,
The Boston bean
il the swellest fruit
I've ever seenn
"The girls with their glasses in Boston town,
All want Ine IN ieS;
For they know that bachelor President
il boUmless without q mate.
Oh The bean, the bean,
The Boston bean
Is the swcllest fruit
I've ever seeu.h
The ladies were giving small course OF
biographical lectures at private houses and
they interviewed a Senator for the use Of
biz house for the next one.
"What is 10 he the subjectYn he Inquired.
"Bacon,n was the reply OF the lady In
charge.
"um-um," he hesitatcd. "Certaiuly,
you may have the use Of my house; but II
seems TO me you might have selected a
more hlgh-toned subject for lecture than
provisions"
Il From Tales OF The Executive Session.
81 Observe" remarked Mr.. Henpeck, sin
an extract from Miss Cleveland's novel, tina,
the man says TO the woman, 'Emelinc, why
don't you say somethlngF and Ill bet O
bonnet that they amt married."
"Why amt theyS" asked his wife.
"Because II they were," responded Hen
peck, picking up his hat, ''if they were
my dear, he would have said, 'Emeline
why don't you don't say something's
"Is Joe Howard n very young writer'''
said the business manager TO the city editor
"Youngi Thunder, he's been at 1t since
Adam was n yearling," replied the em
phatic city editor.
"Ob, excuse me,n continued the abashed
business manager, ~ didn't know; but
notice In one OF bis recent letters to the
Boston Globe that he refers to trout q.
'speckled Beauties and thought only the
kid writer's did that.n
The wife was reading the paper and the
husband was figuring mp summer expenses
81 notice, dear" she said, looking up
"that the paper says Secretary Whitney Il
going TO establish an auxiliary navy"
"ugb," grunted the husband.
"What is an auxiliary navy, dcari" sh,
went on, not noticing his impoliteness.
"Ughi An auxiliary navyS Oh. pre-
sume 1t must be the mule that hauls the
canal boat.n
One dispatch says Vancouver was burned
up; another SAWS 10 WAS burned down