The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1886-06-13

New YORK, June Ill always thought that
Anarchists were idiots, but never knew that
Knights of Labor were humorists until recently.
funny set of men on the face Of the earth. You
may know this when I tell you that railway
corporation has no more sense of humor than
sense of soul, and these knights have made the
Third-avenue railroad laugh along its iron tracks
from end to end. The Empire Protective Benev-
olent Order of Tie-uppers ought to start comic
paper, and put nothing into it but their official
acts, and every railroad manager in the country
would laugh himself into Mysteries in month.
Some OF the acts of the Knights are equal to
Mpnchausen or Grimm. They wanted to stop
the Third-avenue by a strike and they
made it impossible for any strike to affect the
Third avenue They wanted to deprive it of
drivers, and they brought in new and better
men. They depended on public opinion, and
with the keenest sense of humor they deprived
the public of all horsecars. They wanted to
get rid of the police, and they got bill passed
adding five hundred new men TO the force They
knew that their only hope was in holding their
ignorant dupes in solid mass, they disguised
them with the management They wanted to bet
ter the condition OF 800 men on the Third-ave.
nue. road, so they depriv ed them of situations
and drove them to other cities. They wanted to
cripple the road, so they made it Independent Of
strikes
Jehosaphat! when the Knights started in by
selecting chiefs with the names of Powderly and
Irons, / knew they were humorists, and the
next thing expected to see was committee ap-
pointed of bricks and cart-rungs. but never
thought OF anything so funny as this board of
management fighting the public, the authorities
the railroads, and its own men simultaneously.
The amusement season in New York is folded
up and put away in camphor. The best and
brightest have come in like chickens to roost,
and you can see the astral Arabs on Union Square
in radiant apparel between II and g. Not many
of them are buying yachts this summer. Char
ley Stephenson, believe, has retrenched to a
cat-rigged yawl, and Kate Forsyth will have TO
put up with canoe, which, from all I have
heard she can paddle herself There is Grape on
the door of the Bijou for the departed Dixey. A
monument of bricks has been erected in front of
Dalv's to the memory of Ada Rehan. Some
flowers are thrown every night on the grave of
Wallack's. The grass is growing on the Academy
stage, and toad stools are cut every morning in
the maroon boxes.
Refined ham-fat broke out at the Union SO uare
for few nights, but it broke out of the frying
pan into the fire. It refined itself away to a mist
and presently was missed altogether. Dauvray
is gone The star has set. The Japanese Viii
lage folded it's tents and hid its intents. Mather
sits at the window of the Union square Hotel in
blue, thinking of the Pacific coast. Robson and
Crane are drying their nets at Cohasset There
is the faint friction of syndicate at Niblos get
ting up Theodore" 'agin Bernhard" A little
Kentucky girl named Ware comes to the surface
in week at the Grand Opera-house But it is
all languid ana late. With the lilacs comes in
disposition to do. sEven Beecher refused to die
to accommodate the telegraphers, and the Presi-
dent wouldn't trot his bride out ''for cent" In
this staRnation had counted heavily on the
Knights 1 thought they would do something
knightly or even hourly. 1t was my fond de-
fusion that they mad the pezang to make things
lively. What deusion! One little policeman
traversing two wards has closed them up like Far
Rockaway CLAIMS. NYM CRINKLE.