West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1886-04-30
a COLO SNAP.
ih" t'"Ni winter and spring Variety OF
Hi~utrck ~. ~ weather.

III" I'uNi winter and spring Variety OF
lu~tutrck ~. ~ weather
take my picco ot frozen uk. whit
tied down to "a point, i'm hand lo re-
mark that lit g. cold Ii this writing
should look httlc ~tin. you must c\
cusc No. as IL Is frozen ~o While
write the Wind blow, through the Kew.
hole m such a frozen. solid stream that
! can ~troddlr it and ride; and lest the
kcyholr should blow ont proceed tc
plug 10 mp. II the wind outside would
stop tor one minute 1t would hc frozen
50 fast that It could not cot loose tin
the middle ot urNt summer. nothing
could ever prN 1t loose; and the cook
has just como i'm and saws hc set the
cohcc-pot on top ut the red hot Kitchen
stove and II has frozen to IL; and as hc
can not release II with Cold-Chi~Cl he
is afraid we can have no coffee for dim
ncr to-day. but thinks it would never
como to a boil anyhow Two lovers
who stopped ON the corner for "a min-
ute talk found. ON starting tu no. that
their feet had frozen To the walk. and
they are now working with crow bar, to
release them. Men come into the hotel
office and rub their hands over the rcd
hot coal stove, and asl, why they don
start fire i'm it. Such cold day as this
amy way. Telegraph poles are frozen
oil along the railroad clear down to
the ground. Nou can take piece
of flame i'm your hands and roll it
mp into "a ball. and play catch
with It; AMI YOU will never feel
the heat of IT, The hlaCksmithS com
plaln that when they get their iron rcd
hot il freezes red hot. and while il
looks like they could work IT when they
hit it with hammer il breaks all to
pieces, it is So deceptive had a tooth
which the dentist aud his burly assist
ant pulled at for an hour this morning,
but il wouldn't budgo The dentist
sand 1t was either frozen tighl i'm there.
or the tooth thought il was too cold To
bc out. Message frozc along ON the
telephone wires, and they had To hc
Knocked oil with "a pole. II lis no use
to put on six suits of wooden clothes,
for IL docs no good; il rather keeps the
cold inside 50 il can't get out. The
landlord j. not particular ian CNaCting
payment of board i'm advance. because
hc knows the guests couldn't run away
very fast or get far The creeks are
frozen to the bottoms, so thatthc farm
crs are intending TO pry them ont and
roll them over into more convenient
places. People meeting never shake
hands, because, Won sec. if they did,
their arms are likely to come OH. ion
every body nearly is frozen \ man i'm
the hotel this morning rot his ear
slapped for something ~ other for
saying lit cold likely and the ear
ratified down ON the llOor like "a broken
lltt H.. II.
SOIidly that IL will take two or three
exceedingly hot summers To thnw' il
out and the landlord is scOrrcspundingly
cheerful; none of it is eaten on the
table Every case OF fever i'm the town
is completely frozen out, but if
IT. ever gets warm the physicians
say the fever will then thnw
and be as good rs ever for all medical
purposes When people freeze hard
they merely stand them up in the cor
nrrs and don't bother about them. foI
they know they will thaw ont as soon
as change Of weather comes, but
what - SO mean about our landlord. he
won allow amy rebate ON board and
charge for storage. Two cowboys
got into "a fight and shot seventeen
times at each other out ON the corner
but while they never missed "a shot tho
balls all glanced on ~ ilattcncd out. a.
their flesh was frozen so solid The
landlord doc. his best bul il is impo--
-ibIc for him tO give new guests warm
reception. The steam from the victual.
when they do gct hot rises up frozen
and bang- Nou ou the nose. and $50 II
keeps you continually dOdgiug. If lou
should kick all the bed cover, on you
in the night YOU couldn't tell the diff
ference; and IL wouldn't matter much
any way, for they do no good One
would think il would not hc cold here
for the rest Of this century, and thut
al! the cold bad been used i'm Tine man
uiacturc Of Obi, cold snap when 20
guest goes 10 bed thc porter has first
10 go and shovel the cold out Of the
room with scoop before be- can got
in: and they lrt you down to the bot.
tom Of riNy-loOt well with ron
when you want 90 wash in thr morn
ing, a- no wafer can hc brought 90 the
top. Your fingers trcc/ to ever,
thing you touch sO far mine have
touched nothing valuable enough Co.
speak about. But ihc porter just uou
stumbled aud fell dowu--tair-. break
ing him-clfiutp thousand pieces. -l
close tO 90 and view bi. remains. which
are so numerous a. w. B,V0ir. Ut a..
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