The Labor enquirer., 1886-06-05
The Four-Legged ASS SoIilo-
quizes on the Condition of !
the Monkeys,
Who Chew Vile Stuff and Carry
= Fire and Smoke Under
Their Noses.
The Common Sense of an Ordinary
Donkey Superior to
Weak Intellect.
For The Enquirer.

What am l, and how came here2
Those beasts that walk on their hind
legs, like monkeys, and chew vile stuff,
and carry fire and smoke under their
noses, call me an ass.
don't mind what name they give me
as long as they do not degrade me by
coupling my name with any of their
kind.
object strongly to one of those pale
faced monkeys calling another an ass.
1t may be very complimentary to the
other party but it is very humlliating to
me.
If these two legged beasts attempt to
place themselves on level with our
race shall kick.
have great admiration neverthe-
less for the power few of these two
legged beasts have over the common
herd. The cheek of the few is sublime,
but the ignominious submission of the
many is contemplate. The few lay
back and do nothing, while the herd
prepare and bring to them all the cholc-
est daihties.
The toling herd build fine dwellings
and handsome carri ges for the lazy and
impudent few, and are content to live in
novels themselves. No ass in the world
would be guilty of such stupidity. If 1
were to attempt to put up such Job
upon my kind l would be kicked to
death in less than five minutes. And
yet these pale-faced monkeys lay claim
to superior intelligence. They beg, pray
and fight among each other for the priv
llege of toiling. No ass would be guilty
of such foolishness. Tney toll on and
fill the warehouses full of goods and
turn over the KEY to the cheeky mon
KEYS, who promptly lock the doors and
perform cabalistic sign by placing
their thumb on the end of their nose
and extending their digits.
Then again do these foolish beasts
seek and implore for more work, not
withstanding they know the warehouses
are full of goods. laying idle and uncon-
sumed. But their prayers are answered
with the same cabalistic sign or, if they
are too boisterous, with shot I'D shell.
l should like to know the secret of
this magic power, but do not believe
one ass, we're he ever 80 smart, could
hoodwink another like these pale, faced
monkeys do one another.
These monkeys are queer race; over
US in some ways they seem to have an
advantage, but take the average and they
are a sorry lot. They live in the midst
of plenty and 60 hungry. They 90
naked, while there is an abundance Of
clothes lying idle on shelves. They g-
more the laws of nature, and obey the
rules laid down by their crafty oppres.
sors.
These pale-faced monkeys may be in
tellectual, but intellectually does not
fill their bellies nor clothe their backs,
and, until l see that it does 80, shall
continue to work as little as posslbl and
feed upon the best can get.
A weak intellect is worse than none at
ALL Like razor in the hands of a
child, it is pretty sure to wound those
who possess it. This is really what is
the matter with these herds of white
MONKEYS to-day. Their weak ntellects
are played upon by the crafty and
moulded to suit their plans. The prac-
tical common sense of an ordinary dom
key is superior to the philosophy of a
weak intellect. do not ass plre to be-
come pale-faced monkey, nor to burn
fire under my nose. J. J. MARTIN.
SAN FEANCIsCo, May %.