Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-08-20
A CUCKOO CLOCK.
1t causes Considerable Trouble in the Majors
Household and is Roughly Handled.

The major had always made speciality
of timpieces. He says there is nothing
more cheerful than to wake up at night
and hear the dainty machinery of a pet
clock working away in the dark; and that
if it wasn't for his clock he believes he'd
sometimes be desperate enough to wish
he was married. His clock was originally
of the alarm species and for years used
to go off with whiZZ, rattle, and get the
major up for business, but all of a sudden
1t got mecanlcal dyspepsia, or had con
Jestlon of of the handspring or some
thing, and contracted the habit of going
off at odd hours, sometimes in the middle
of the night and sometimes not until noon
the next day, and so the ma jor either lost
his sleep or missed important engage
ments, and had no end of trouble. He
took it to the jewelers. and the expert in
serted pill box in his eye and held an
autopsy, and said he thought he might be
able to remedy the trouble temporarily for
81, but if the major wanted steady com
fort he had better spend So and get a
new clock. The major concluded to keep
1t and not wind up the alarm side in the
future, but use his pet merely as timekeep-
er, and resorted to the artifice of leaving
his shutters open that the sunlight
would pour in and awaken him two hours
before breakfast.
Saturday afternoon a mysterious pack
age came from the major, and after din
ner he opened it and showed US clock
built like a Swiss cottage, made to hang
high up on the wall and run by two big
weights and lot of brass chain. The
ma jor said it was a cuckoo clock, and
said the man who sold it guaranteed that
hll
| at the cottage window, sing sweetly. and
vanish, and he thought it would be just
the thing to hang in the hall. So he got
the steF-ladder and drove a nail near the
ceiling, got the cottage in position. set
| the hands and started the pendulum. The
| pendulum wigwagged several times sol
emnly and stopped. The major started
1t again, but to no purpose, and, finally,
| after two hours tinkering, gave it up, and
| we all went to bed to be up bright and
early for LUray. About II 80 Dick, who
| had been at the club, came in. and in
| cropping along the hall accidently moved
| the weights, and In some mysterious way
| started the machinery. In twenty min
| utes, just in the middle of profound
silence, we were aroused by this:
| "Br-r-r-r-r-r-click Whoopoo- 90!
-br-r-r-click.
Dick thought the baby next door had
| collie again, and Bunny was afraid 1t was
| burglars. The major came into my room
with a revolver, and wanted to know if 1
| had heard anyone yell murder. and We
| could both hear muffied conversation pro-
| ceeding from the servants room in the
| basement. Then we leaned over the ban
/ listers and listened. and concluded ii was
a false alarm and went to bed again, but
| Just as consciousness poised to take her
| fight the thing broke loose again, thus:
| "Ber-r-zit! Whoop 90! buzz ooploo.
ging! xxzzz hoo hoo. zz-z whewplew.
clang! tootoo! kim. Lookloo, sizzz!
| bloobloo.-phst.'' and then the thing
shut up with vicious snap which seem
| ed to be intended to convey the impress
| ion that there was more coming by and
| by. There was commotion in the house
hold. Bunny screamed and Dick came
out with Traitor, the Major turned a
handspring out of bed and went down
| stairs nine at time, and distant sounds
of slamming shutters gave hints of a
general uprising among the neighbors.
| OF course this time the major had his
suspicious, and after finding all the doors
| and windows securely fastened, and as
! certaining there was no manical cat con-
cealed in the cellar, concluded that some
thing was wrong with the chronological
cottage, and after sitting up for half an
hour caught the clock in the act 1t was
too high on the wall TO reach. and the
step ladder was In the back yard. so Dick
reached up and whacked the pendulum
with his cane and succeeded in unship-
ping 1t, with the satisfactory result that
the machinery ran six times as fast as be-