davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-09-23
SPENCER'S LUCK,
An Ex-senator Tells How He Got Hi
First Start in the World.

An Ex-senator Tells How He Got His
First Start in the World.
Ex-senator Spencer gave me the ether
day the story of his first piece of good
luck, which illustrates the fact that
fortune has quite as much to do even
with mans getting good start in
life as mere merit. Spencer says that
he went to Des Moines, Ia. when he
was young fellow, and arrived there
with just $75 in his pocket. He was
alone and without friends. He was
very homesick, and went to bed early
to escape the blues. While he was in
bed he was walked by conversation
in the next room. The conversation
was on such a subject that it attracted
his attention Immediately. He got up
and listened at crack in the thin par
tition between his room and the next,
and heard the two commissioners who
had the locating of the capitol Of the
State of Iowa discussing where they
would place it. They finally agreed
where they would go, and then made
arrangements to buy certain tract of
land adjacent to the location, the only
part that was for sale. Mr.. Spencer
said that he got up very early in the
morning and went to the owner of this
piece of land. He asked him what he
would take for it, and he said $1,000
cash. Spencer said: "Well, suppose
thirty days is cash. is it not? I am
here from New York, and it will take
me about that time to get the money
The man said: Thirty days is good
enough, if you can pay something
down" So Mr.. Spencer paid $50 and
took a receipt for it An hour later
the man wanted to back out of the
sale, but the receipt held it. Spencer
sold that piece of land so as to clear
$2,5 500 within the next ten days. This
gave him his first start. He went to
Nebraska and from that State went in
to the war. While he was in Nebraska
he lived in a hotel with five friends,
each of whom afterward came to the
United States Senate. These men were
Kellogg, Paddock, Hitchcock, Upton
and Saunders. N T. World.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-09-23
PERSONAL AND LITERARY.

Mrs. Langtry often walks eighteen
miles a day and ''tires out" two men
On tie road.
w. w. Corcoran, the Washington
banker. is lightweight years old, and
has given more than 100000 for
charity.-Washington Star.
The widow Of Parson Brownlow
still lives at Knoxville. Tenn. and
keeps q bound volume of Brosrnloso's
Wing as memorial of her husband.
Carl Banck recently celebrated tho
fortieth anniversary of his connection
with the Dresden Journal as musical
critic. He il now in his seventeen
year.
The Catholic periodicals. of tho
United States in the English language
consist of one quarterly review. about
seven monthly magazines and about
thirty weekly papers.
Mrs. Harriet Beecher Stowe realizes
that her cup of literary distinction is
full and running over, and has an
bounced that she will write no moro
for publication.-M Y. Tribune.
DIR. Oliver Wendell Holmes pho
tographs are everywhere to be seen in
London shop windows. and the people
are still talking of him as the lion Of
the year. as great . success in England
as Dickens was in America
Jenny Lind. the once famous
songstress, has given up her London
mansion, and Is now living in contented
retirement ut Malvern Hills, Eng. She
is sixty-five years old, and her voice
still retains much of its power.
Probably the youngest preacher in
the world IS /. Z. Bill, Baptist only
twelve years of age, who preached
sermon recently at st. Martins. N. B.,
to large congregation. His father il
a clergyman.-CAicago journal.
General Harvey, of the United
States army, is the oldest man on the
register. He became soldier in 1918.
and participated in every war in which
the country has engaged since that
time. He is eighty-six years of age
and very Chicago Inter Ocean,
Mr.. Cooley, who died leaving q
fortune of two or three millions, made
chiefly out of his Lady's Book, when
asked why he did not raise the stand
ard of his magazine said: g am not
a magazine for the few, but a
for the Eliza James. They
are in vast majority PMladelphia
Press
The Formers Cabinet, of Amherst,
Mass, has been published eighty-tivo
years, during the last seventy-six of
which it has known but two proprie-
tors, the present senior editor, Deacon
E. d. Boylston, and his father. the lat
ter of whom purchased it in 1909 ana
sold it to the former in 1S47. Deacon
Boylston commenced work at the case
at the age of eight, and now at the
age of seventy-two does more or less
in the composing-room every week.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-09-23
TEUTONiC BULLS,
Some Amusing Extracts from the Columns
OF German Papers.


The Irish have not got a monopoly
for the manufacture of bulls. The
German papers abound in them. Here
are 4 few specimen bricks:
AFTER the door was closed soft fe-
male footstep slipped into the room,
and with her own hand extinguished
the taper
Both doctors were unable to re-
store the deceased once more 10 lie
and health"
"A man living at Freudenstadt tried
to shoot his wife. but missed her. for
which offense he was promptly locked
up"
The chariot of revolution is rolling
onward. and crashing its teeth as it
rolls, was what revolutionary lead
er told the Vienna students in 1913 in
a speech.
1.-The Ladies' Benevolent Associa-
ton has distributed twenty pair Of
shoes which will dry up many tears"
Il was sitting at the table enjoying
a cup OF coffee when a gentle voice
tapped me on the shoulder. l looked
around and saw my old friend"
Among the emigrants was an old
blind woman who came to America to
see her only son once more before she
died. "-Ieras Sittinqs.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-09-23
One Of Dakota's Needs.

"How do you find business in the
Territory" asked an Eastern man of a
friend whom he met on the train.
pretty fair, but we need more Eat
ern spectators to make it BOOM"
us that sop
Eyes, we want more of them to
come out and invest Now for in
stance, I've got piece of land up here
and have been ready for two years now
to plant gold mine, or silScr diggins,
or an oil well, or any thing else the oc-
casion seemed to require and not a
Spectator has shown up. 1 tell you
it's discoura@ing for an honest young
man. 4 few o. these wealthy New
Workers would make better feeling in
financial circles" = Esteitine @. IT,
Bell
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-09-23
TO A MOSQUITO.


VI all hum-bugs accursed,
Mosquito, you're the worst;
xou poise on me-Pd like to poison you.
All summer tslap) you come
And make yourself Ito hum
AS slap my other blood relations do.
I've bills enough sent in
Without yours, bird of sin;
10 scratch for slap (of course 1 missed my
aim.
I'm bored by others. too,
But when I'm bored by you
I'm overheard, slap wish you the same
All day and night you sing:
70, Death! here is thy sting''
Til in cold blood itch to kill youi OF
Miss Quito, you must be
Completely mashed" on me,
And (slap)-you are. You ain't for there
you 60.
Well, when the cold waves hum,
You won't and you'll succumb
When Jack Frost nips you worse than you
nip me.
But then. old friend, you may
Freeze to me any day,
And you'll be warmed" as slap you ought
to be.
II C. Dodge. in Gooddus Sun.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-09-23
Misusing a Common Word.

Most English-speaSing Germans use
the word already without much re-
gard to sense. at is a fine day, al
ready" where are you going. al
ready" are fair specimens.
Recently in Harlem a physician was
hastily summoned to attend a man who
was injured by an accident.
The door was opened by the unfort-
innate mans wife, who said, with tears
running down her face:
''You vas too late, doctor. too late;
mein man vas dead, already. IN Y.
Sun.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-09-23
FLlMsY BUILDINGS
The Tremendous Annual F1re-Tax Ha3d
by the American People.

The Tremendous Annual F1re-Tax Ha3d
by the American People.
What though. as Mr.. Atkinson est;-
mates, the annual loss of property in
the Unite.! States by fire amounts to
500, 100000; the cost of maintaining
fire insurance companies to $50, OOO,-
900 and Of fire-extinguishing APP
pliances to $25. 900, 600, making total
fire tax of $3.50. 900. 900, equal to $1.25
on each 800 worth of annual product,
or between ten and fifteen per cent. of
the annual sayings of the Nation, the
people of the United States-notwith-
standing the example set them by early
Spanish architects, the builders of
Europe. and the dictates of experience
and reason-will continue to erect for
dwelling. manufacturing and CONNER
clal purposes, structures sometimes
called ''fire-proof'' or ..slow burning"
which the flames lap up as readily as .
cat does milk, and which, when once
on tire, become traps for human life;
from which, in spite Of warning and
haste. it is generally very difficult and
too often impossible to escape.
The trap is like the inside of stove,
full OF draughts and fuel; these are in
the shape of elevator shafts. air shafts.
stairways. wells for light, etc.. with
plenty OF painted pine on every han d
in flooring, doors. castings. ETC., as ig-
nitible as finder. An old-fashioned
Mexican stone or adobe mansion, or
an ancient Italian marble palace, pre-
sent little more invitation or hold to
the flames than a granite hill top; but
most American buildings are as ready
for combustion as one of those elab-
crate constructions of festive fire.
crackers, in which the soul of the Chi
nese takes supreme delight We might
do differently and infinitely better. and
shall improve buildings for certain
purposes and in certain places, but
the vast majority will for ages be run
up in flimsy manner, of tiimsy ma
terial, prepared and ready for the
flames to lick up in trice, or for the
tornado or cyclone to scatter like
chaff-a calamity in either case liable
to inflict cruel injury, heightened by
the loss of human life or mutilation
or mangling of human limbs, to which.
in some instances, death itself seems
-InSur0nce Times.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-09-23
Jt seams that there ave some hea

1T seems that there are some heavy
drinkers in Philadelphia. The Times
of that city says that one Philadelphia
hotel has six customers who drink over
sixty-five WHISTLES a day each. Anothe-
hotel has two customers who imbibe
regularly eight quarts of champagne
day. ten or twelve who take over
twenty WHISTLES day, eight or nine
who guzzle forty glasses of beer after
three o clock each day, and one Gus
toner who regularly drinks TWO bot
ties OF cOgnac day.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-09-23
HUMOROUS.

-''Misery may like company" says
. colored philosopher, ''but I'd raider
hab de rheumatic in one leg den hab it
in bof."
We read of q Rev. Mr.. Grim mar.
rying a couple at Yocumtowa, Pa
There is grim sort of humor in being
matrimonially yoked at Yoke'emtown
by Mr.. Grim.-Norristown Herald.
Why He Left
Ayoung man who had luck at bezique,
Used to play all the days of the wique.
But when they glanced up his sleeve.
He exclaimed: Il must leeve!''
Life.
-"What do you think? woke up
this morning absolutely deprived of all
intelligence, perfect idiot" ':And
how were you when you went to bed
last nightf' 1.-THE same as usual"
'Oh. that accounts for it. "-French
Joke.
In the juvenile papers we read, I'M
der the head of ''Pets," Of dogs so
tame hat they will eat from your hand.
There are other dogs so tame that they
will eat from your leg. There are some
in Newark. Bits.
-"What makes you grow up to be
menu" teacher in a primary school in
Melrose, near Boston, asked of her class
of boys the other day. II know" said
the smallest boy in the class. What
is it?' BIRTHDAYS"
He wasn't brave young man and
it took him some time to muster up
courage to say: '.Ethel, I would to
Heaven you were Opportunity" ''Why.
George?" because then l might en-
brace you" "Oh, you mean--n-
Indianapolis Herald.
THE last link is broken" the fell
low said. when he kissed his girl good
bye forever. at her request. because
her parents wished a dissolution. A
few days after he received note.
saying: Dear George. there arc plenty
more links; come and break them. y
n. Y. Ledger.
An Irish tailor, making gentle
mans coat and vest too small. was or
dered to take them home and let them
out. Some days after the gentleman
was told that his garments happened
to fit c0untryman of his and he had
let them out at shilling week.-N
Y. Telegram.
80, isn't it lovely night, Adolf
plus? Just fancy how delightful the
nights must be in the Orient! The
azure blue sky, the perfume of the
flowers, the soft tinkling--" 81 tell
you, Miranda, dear, prefer the nights
they have in Alaska. They're just inn
mense." Immense, Adolphus?" YES
for counting. They're So long. you
know. "-Psiladeiphia Cell.
The small boy who furnishes tho
historian with good deal of data
watches his baby sister with constant
curiosity. s'Shc doesn't know any
thing" he said. 'sShe can't talk; she
can't think; she can't read" He
looked at her moment, meditating
on his own superiority, ami shen said.
pityingly: .'Poor little thing: shes
never been to a eircusi"-Tciedo Blade
-English' sehool-board education
continues to yield curious results. The
latest is this: In answer 70 the queS-
ton put by the diocesan inspector:
~Deseribe some effects of the proceed
ings under Queen Mary the GLIB an
swer was recled off: MANY OF the
Bishops were deprived of their sees. :"
One of the managers, however, asked
the meaning of the statement After
long pause one boy put up his hand
and said: '.Had taeir eyes put OUT :
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-09-23

"A religious newspaper published
in this city gravely informed its readers
recently that Noah's wife was turn ed
into pillar OF salt Thus does the
editor disregard the scriptural irdunc-
ton: Remember Lots wife. ".-PhsL
edelphia Record.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-09-23

Now, Mr.. Witness" SAID a Co
lumbus lawyer, care you willing to SOL
emily swear that the chair was facing
the east? Remember. sir, the awful
ness of perjury" Witness-Well, !
won't swear, but + u bet you ten dollars
it Columbus co., Dispatch
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-09-23

There is a bear at Denmark, Me-.
that eats dogs. Every we'll regulated
city and town should have vigorous,
capable bear with just such an appe.
tite. (Me.) JournaA
Wichita eagle., 1886-10-15
Real II Estate ! and Loan
AGENT

Rare Bargains Wich
timo hold Off
prices you will wosfuly dsapponted Prices are Still
advancing and will continue to doSo
Below Partial List Of Bargains and Sure make Big Money
For Investor.
Wichita eagle., 1886-10-15
NEW Works RIVER THIEVES.
-Four Distinct Types OF Aquatic Robbers
A Dangerous Man to Meet.

-Four Distinct Types OF Aquatic Robbers.
A Dangerous Man to Meet.
The stronghold of the river thieves is never
permanent It is transferred from point to
point as often as the elusion OF the police is
necessary, and one day it may be in a dilapi-
dated hut on q lonely spit of sand washed by
the sen, and Oh ihc next under one OF the un-
freuuentcsl piers uptown in New York. Liy-
ing anywhcre-among his friends one mo-
ment, and with his enemies the next; trough
ing it" in an open boat one night and of1iciat-
ing as ward politician, dressed in an envi-
Gus contrast to The laboring men of his dis
trict. the evening following; sleeping under
Junk dealers counter or in Cherry street
ga,ret-his is life of rapid contrasts. He is
unquestionably lower type OF the genius
thief than the adroit burglar who enters our
houses Yet he is gifted with precocity,
which, in tho successful river pirate, becomes
instructive. This aquatic species OF the genus
thief is divided into four types.
l. Tho "morninG riser" and "sun downer"
sleaks around the wharves between daylight
and darkness, morning and evening, and
steals whatever Is left unmatched for few
moments. he never uses boat, and is the
lowest type.
9. The "greaser," always in company with
one or more of bis class, prowls around the
docks in boat, and, to use the language OF
the police, is ION the dead steal" He will
take anything ard resort to any desperate al
terna,iye to escape capture. He is the most
dangerous scoundrcl on tho river, and tho
very worst type the law has to deal with.
D. Tho square" belongs to gang which is
known among the trade" as tho 'Catamar-
ket club" Hc usually effects an understand
ing with the mates and crews Of vessels and
buys what they have sto!en-or "broached,"
in the language of 'the etrado'-fromthoca cargo
during the voyage. He belongs to the largest
and most contemplate type.
T. The "cabin thief is u cunning and adroit
burglar who enters the cabins of vessels by
picking the locks. removing pano OF glass
or chloroforrning the inmates Ho always
operates with companion, who remains in
the boat He will not ccndcscend to steal
saiiclo.h or rope but carries of watches, ships
chronometers and money. He avoids the
junk store, the powerful ally Of tho river thief,
rs a rule, and deals only with o regular
"sencc." Tc is the aristocratic and beau ideal
type-a dangerous man to meet anywhere,
under any circunstanccs.-Brook Eagle.
Wichita eagle., 1886-10-15

"rhc duties Of an actress maid!' was the 10
mark of a trim little lady who had advertised
for n maid. "Why that's something curious
to make newspaper article about. Well, IN
actress maid must I've n maid of Ill work.
Che must know u little OF everything, aiJ1 ono
thing il particular. she must have some knowl-
edge of dresSnalSing. a good maid in this
respect is worth her weight in gold to an ac-
tress. She is O regular money saver. You
see il requires vas. outlay for an actress to
carry q full wardrobe OF part dresses, and q
good maid knows just low, by maxim: an ol-
teration hero and there. TO adapt costume
to two or three parts, and be nble to change
them bacl. again. Then q maid must have
some idea Of hair dressing. and study what
will make he employer appear more effective.
She must he able to tell her mistress when
her make up IS correct BY this mean that
combination Of grease paint ard powder that
cdds TO the appearance OF an actress when she
appears before the footigh;s Asida from
this she must keep careful eye on the effects
of her mistress. and see that they DO not 90
astrsy. 4 good maid is a jewel generally
hard 10 find, and valuable accordingly. They
ere paid I'll the way from $50 to so month
ard expenses. s.r-rittsburg Dispatch.
DR.. Gor:a2ru Las discovered that tie Light
reflected fro-,l greea leaves consists chiefly OF
red and green rays, and By ascertaininS the
proportions of these colors reflected from
leaves, and taking revolving ring with the
like proportions Of color on Ii, he has been
able TO mix these co,oys os it were in tho eye
end reproduce the tint OF the leaves Hs
found during tho inquiry, however, that tha
simple colois did not exactly Reproduce the
color Of the leaf required, bat that q certain
elrlixturc Of black was necessary 10 this end.
Black, it may be remarked, is wel known tc
exist in the cellular structure @: leaves in the
form Of carbon. l. is deposited there, us il
believed, from the absorption Of carboni.
acid gas from the atmosphere by the sto,nats
or mouths on tho under side OF ths Leaf
Wichita eagle., 1886-10-15

n.t Of improved ~, e s
iann
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1886-05-14
State Sunday School Convention.

The red flag OF the toreign in6del, tramp
and Anarchist, has threatened terror and
destruction to our cherished laws and moral
institutions. The serpents OF the stills and
breweries are daily biriOT and singing TO
madness, dehrium tremens and death
thousands of our people. Our newspapers
are filled with sad news Of lawlessness,
thefts, robberies, villainiss, oppression, IN
cendlarism, cruelty, suicide, and death
Civil laws have done much-morsl and
relis ious organizations have done much to
restrain and check the tide Of iniquity that
threatens to oyerwhelm and ruin our coun-
nv. Is there no balm in Gilead, Is there
no physician then? There is q balm-a
cure a Physician, o book of Instructions
a precious Heavenly Code in almost every
family of the State; but alss
it is neglected by its protested
friends. They are sleeping upon the laps
of ease whilst being shorn of their strength
and bound and blinded by the Philistines
OF iniuuity. Awake, Christians, awake,
and hold district and county conventions
Send delegates TO the State convention to
be held in Wheeling on the 10Th and 18th
OF June. Every county from Hancock 10
! Mcdowell. from Mason to Jefferson Is IN
yited 10 send delegates TO meet, consult sna
counsel together upon the best manner OF
teaching the inspired Word" which will
cure all the ills of lite and Is the bright
Light thnt Eliminates created minds, At
tracts and puri6es our moral poTers'
svesteus our affections, promotes the hsr-
mony of society and educstes its pupils for
happiness and heaven. $50
The Word faithfully taught, candldiy
received and obeyed, will empty all
he prisons and poor houses, close
the saloons AMI dens of gambling
md PROSTITUTION In the State. Strife be
I capital and labor will CEASE when
tS,,a.n -uls is adopted, and harmony
and brotherly love swell -on.,sd and on,
rsty and truth will be p. ' "" chs
beloved State will bud and blossom
rose, that it may give seed to the aower
aud bread to the tel" 80 shall my word
be that goeth forth out of my mouth, 1t
shall not return to me void, saith the
Lord of hosts. Fathers, mothers, are your
children safe? Children, we look to you
for help to learn and teach the glad tidinRs
and ell the State with the knowledge Of
the Lord. j. .. d.
Fairmont, May 10, 1886.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1886-05-14
He Took Them Into Camp.
CHICAGO LEDGER.

After The advance Of our army upon
Bragg at Tullahama, and his retreat. the
pioneer brigade pushed on to Elk river TO
repair bridge. While one OF its men, a
private, ives bathing in the river, hive OF
Brsggs men. guns IN hand, came TO the
band and took aim at the swimmer, one OF
them shouting
Come here, you id Yank out OF The
wetI
The Federal was quite sure that he was
done for" and he st once obeyed. After
dressing himself be was thus .sccosted;
You surrender. our prisoner, DO you 7
"Of course / do"
That's kind. Now, well surrender to
you" And the FIVE stacked their arms
before him, their spokesman adding;
We've done with EN-, aud have said to
old Bragg good-byl Sesesh is played out,
Now, you surround Us and take Us to your
camp"
This was done accordingly.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1886-05-14
A Gentle Hint.
Rnriosl Rsoord.

A member of the junior class at Harvard
has been paying pretty persistent atten'
tons 10 a young lady living in -
street. His classmates took lively inter
est in the case, and IS long as the calls
we're limited to once week they only sym
pathizsd, but.when the visits reached i've,
Sly and even seven times 10 week, the
boys felt that something ought to be done
Accordingly, they put their heads together
and decided to give him q gentle hint to
change his lodgings. A few nights later,
after q protrscted meeting at the house OF
the young lady, upon stepping out upon the
piazza to take leave Of her, the junior found
that the entire contents of his room--even
10 trunks, curtains and bedroom furniture
had been removed during the evening
and disposed around the yard and piazza
BE does not call there at all now.