The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1886-12-22

Let Coo lead him up the hill.
:, no;nt any woman can appreciate
Point lace
The hest cobblers do not talk. Least
said, soonest mcndcd.
On Christmas day, though The turkeys
tender, the caters stuff
The baker is the only loafer entitled to
respect.
The universal Christmas carol is adapted
t. the Fest toon.
The fate Of the pretty girl under the mis-
tlcjnc-kiiSs met.
lis lie barbers apprentice who often
dyes young.
Oysters lave language Of their own,
and clans stew.
4 fog signal reminds the sailor of the
tower OF bay bell.
When man falls down his temper gen.
orally gets up before nc does
4 question for dccorators-How can a
tr.cZc ad0rn Z warm interior!
OF llau suddenly struck dumb. It may
Gc said that his melancholy daZc has come.
Courtship, like champagne, soon looses
lis zcSt If kept too long after the pop.
Hush money is what the young husband
parts with for paregoric, soothing syrups,
| etc.
Christmas is apt to be followed by blue
mass in families where the old allopathlc
practice prevails.
Christmas dinner at home, no matter
/ how mcagrc, is preferable TO Christmas
lunch anywhere else.
Santa Claus is q dead issue-the rising
generation is very smart, and know q thing
or two when lie sees it.
The man who racks his brain to get up
an original Christmas menu is called the
Great Christmas Menu-vir.
The man who never does any harm
might crawl into cave and stay there ten
years without being missed.
They say ''one swallow does not make
spring" Just try boiling coffee. and sec
if il won't.
Christmas lesson for the young: Chill.
dren. the i:e&t part Of the turkey is tho
drum-Stick.' y
When man is about TO snceze he had
rather do that than anything else in the
world.
Points in the stock market are proba
hiy 50 called because spectators generally
Gel stuck on them.
England doesn't object to taxing a droE
when hcfccls likcit. Last year she dranl
$6lG.343, 900 worth Of liquor.
\ fashion writer says all the fashions are
for slender women. They are certainly
not designed for slender purses.
Love is blind" True true The
young lover never secs the dog till ii is toe
late 10 escape i'll q dignitied manner.
The Puritan is the name Of new colo,
in ladies goods. OF course it is warranted
10 bc fast.
The only circumstances under which ;
man can pull more than horse is when ht
is pulling at bottle.
! For every nan killed in war ten have
been sent over the gulf by the aid Of thu
corNscrcw, says Il temperance paper.
;, policeman in ST. Louis attacked by
cholera morbus lost so much rest that ht
was forced tc 20 on duty to recupcrate.
Washington pridcs itself upon the pos
session Of an egg 1000 years old. We've
seen some that seemed TO he older thar
that.
| \ ice. easy exercise for Christmas day
IS ti:at Of counting the change YOU Lave
lcf;. !: can bc done generally with oDt
Ilanc.
Ka:c Field has recently said that Tome.
hear with their eyes. This particularly
applies to the woman who watches lel
ncignbor through the kcyholc.
Some one says there is great deal o.
character i'll eyebrows We do not know
aJoat tl;,. but We do know that there is ;
great deal OF India ink in them sometimes
\ little girl under five, looking at al
ugly face in a book. said: u think the
Eca:areS are good, if he was not making ur
q face.
Speaking of the widening of woman,
sphere. Why do not some Of the sex take tt
carpcHtering? Women are generally inter
cstcd in joiner work.
:. Tennessee man can so perfectly imi
tate The sounds made by two dogs engaged
in lighting that he calls a Memphis congre
cation out Of church in three minutes.
4 Skoc can be made in some of the Lynn
Mass. shops in 40minutcs. a pair Of feet
would be likely to 90 through such shoes
! with almost is much dispatch.
Il don't think there is aIy royal blood ia
my veins remarked a d-faced young
man is he made bce-line for the dentists
"but M. Jaw is every inch aching
Bad seasons and short crops arc the latest
solutions Of what ails the farmer. Ough,
not short crops to bring good prices? II
not why not?
\ man becoming aEs-y because his gun
kicked badly. his companion said, Guns
are but human, after all. They are almost
sure to kick when the load is too heavy.
When YOU visit fair this season politely
! in,",i:e for the treasurer When found,
hand him your l'.rsc with pleasant smile
Ii viii save you ali further trouble
1t is hard scratching either to devise OF
to afford all the Christmas gifts that the
season calls for But if YOU have to scratch
icrnemb@r ti!at your patron saint is Santa
claws.
| Railway conductors say that Friday il
Tie ii@htcst day of the week for travel. II
is probably because SO many people have a
supcrSti,ious idea of the day as being I'M
lucky.
4 Kentucky man claims to be able to
/ ill his mouth with water and blow it
through ilis cars The remarkable part
Of this statement is that Tie man is able to
! take the water into his mouth.