Devils Lake inter-ocean. (Devils Lake, Ramsey Co., Dakota [N.D.]) 1884-1905, 1886-02-20
HOW TO TRAVEL.
Rules for Passengers Which d Ger Slightly
from the G ,,.l.n Bale.

suse0 toe GAAseuker1 ntCO u usE SltRhtly
from the G ,id-n Bale.
--
First, please keep of the grass.
Travellers without baggage must pay
in advance. Sn mist travellers with
to-" much baggage. Second, the trav.
e!er VINO has never before been twenty
miles away from home j. permitted 10
sit in II seat and put his feet on an.
other. Third. the man who plants his
dusty boots on plush furniture at home
conduct himself in u like manner on Il
train. Fourth, gas burned after four
o'clock will be charged extra Fifth.
the passenger who knows the least
about anything is particularly request.
ed 10 talk the loudest about everything.
Sixth. whenever the conductor calls
''aLl aboard" all passengers who are
taking their first trip in u railway Car
will shout, IF you can't get u board
ge: u rail" This will enable the con.
ductor to pick them out without any
trouble. Seventh. the passenger who
has been ''aboard" Cooks excursion.
list, Europe, Asia and Africa in ninety
days.. will please give accounts of the
fabulous speed and superior comforts
of continental railways; (two days and
ninety seconds from Buu.ogne to Paris
including 'stops). Eighth, all loose
change 10 possession OF the passengers
may b, safely iu,rusted to the train
boy. who will deposit it in Il safe place,
and give you collateral security for the
same. Ninth. no smoking aeatt the
shalt. Ieuth, please to remember the
porter. Eleventh, when the brakeman
Hills his cheek with half an apple. just
cri5bed from the train boy, aud shouts.
Observation-Disclosures" and
s:nasles tho rest Of it into atoms by
Banging the door shut. get off; that Is
your station. Twelfth. when you show
you baggage checks to the conductor,
and he says ~"donnonoth bout 'tay
task l aggishmast," aud hurries on,
put your cncck back in your pocket
and trust 10 luck. Thirteenth. no pas
senyer may smoke a fragrant 25-cent
imported cigar anywhere save iu the
cattle u set apart for 4 smoking
room. but be may fill his jaws with
navy plug. and spit III! over the whole
train from headllgn. to rear brake, if
he wishes. Fourteenth. always abuse
the financial and NJ, cAauical manage
tnent of the road over which you are
travelling to the brakrman; it's all his
fault that the road isn't run in your ill.,
terest. Fifteenth. passengers will bear
in mind that the h~rakemau's name is
'Jonnuy;'' never Call him anything
else. Tue conductor may be formally
addressed rs Say. G orr o." or ii his
appearance is usually impress I'VE, you
may say Mister" S xtreutu, ut the
u:ainS-stasion, the man WHO at home
has meat three times i week aud q not
meal on Sunday, IS expected to grow
at The BIZ! OF fare, keep tue waiter busy,
yea he is starv.d to death every time
he goes oven ,nat liue. gorge his way
through the wuo!c bill vi lare twice,
ihcn h!ck III thr bl.l and rave because
the company doesn't allow its passen-
gers halt lne tine tor their meals.
Seventeenth. this is a free country, and
ANY passenger has Il right 10 torco his.
Company upon amy hclpIcss stranger.
M.,,,c ..ito conversation witn HIM. ASK
MN l. ml.ion q !cstlons about himself.
its %lAnn.!A, IA, ullslnrss, his personal
;iiia'r>. ami may even y pci linn 10
r,'u;,ln ,wa1c To participate in sucn
cu~n>cr,atrI! E.y,:lc, MN, 40 nul pick
ANY n;.l, Il over oi sM,un. N%.uc,ceiln,
:, .nl-Ita.,, II Is cXl" c.ca that the
poorest Whistler III lAc Car Will wni,t.e
It tu.ic wI.cn ne does not Know, uud
vJUAy c.,r eyer Ia ard. lwcnL.ctn, it
Is tHe earnest ue,ire Ul tuu COMPANY
over whose road You now tray :lln..
tnal ~ soon Is J'u near Any utncr pas
srnscr Mni,l.in., you Will tout up u
tuic.c,s mc,o"y ut yoar own. Inis
p.ctses the passengers VINO DO not
whistle. T~wcnly-irst, sass the
6rakrnaan AL you can while on the
tram. !. mlyhl break your BACK il you
postponed II uELll Ae :uUk, his uniform
1fH L ~. LiII.. -, l..iL - ~. IL. Il,