The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1886-11-28

A ST Louis Society Leader Makes Some SuS-
gestions on Etiquette and Behavior.


gesriOns on Etiquette and Behavior.
Mrs. r. J. Lakeland, in Post Dispatch.
were to suggest an improvement so far as
orr society interests are concerned, it would be-
in the direction of the attitude of unmarried
daughters toward their mothers in the bomel
and for this the mothers themselves are alone I'd
blame! So long as a young lady remains unl
married, and dwells in her mothers home, she
and not her mother, Is, or should be, subordi1
nate in the family. There is something
fundamentally wrong, either in antece@
dents or domestic influence, when a mother
who graces Tor should grace) her own home.
which the pride and love of her husband has PROS
cured for her, banishes herself from her own
place. and yields the privilege which her charm
of mind or character have won to daughters
whom she may love with her whole unselhshl
heart. 1t is poor preparation indeed for
the future happiness of these loved ones,
to inculcate into their young lives SELF
ishness that will react upon the ten
derMmothers heart itself. The greatest
boon mother can give her daughter is reali-
zation of the value of the Fifth commandment.
The girlsIwho love their mothers best are those
who respect them most, and these will in their
But, going back to the fact that certain unwisaI
customs are obtaining in our homes would
mention one as being decidedly bad
form" VIZ; young girls are now issuing
So and so, at home," etc, etc., quite
ignoring thus the presence of mother or older
relative When the young lady Is head OF her.
own home this, or course, is as 1t should be, but
the mistake of such disrespect otherwise belongs
to the mothers themselves when they ABB
dictate their position and make themselves
merely accessory to their own daughters. I
have heard that excuse for this is offered
in the fact that married ladies may take
offense If they learn that Mrs has
been lat home" and they have not been
invited | hardly think, however, that this
Justified sacrifice OF good breeding Again.
young ladies' are beginning to hold receptions
afternoons when their mothers are not ex-
pected to be present. but may appear never
theless, If q chance married caller arrives.
Ladies have informed me that on several oc-'
casions they have called at houses where the
reception day has been stated, to find, to their
surprise, the daughters presiding at the tea
table and have had TO wait until the lady Of
the house had changed her wrapper for a dress
suitable to the parlor and most amazed senaa-
ton of being de trop when taken aside into a re-
mote corner, ''to be ont of the way of tho young
people, has accented the awkwardness of the
call One more word IN regard 10 reception days
proper Such days should not be claimed unless
lady's circle of acquaintance and her position
in society justify it. If she has entertained gen.
erously In former years or continued to do
So or II her society or other engages
ments are cngrossing, she has the
right to ask her acquaintances to-
call on some specially appointed day that is, III
they wish to see her. If they do not regard this
small courtesy they should not be surprised or
take offense when omitted from the list of in1I
vited guests on occasions OF luncheons, recepFi
tions or other entertainments. OF course every
lady has small circle of intimate friends whom
she sees at any time. but it 10 only right that
formal callers and fashionable acquaintance rel
gard the '.at home day of those who try to
make their homes center Of enjoyment for
others.