Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1886-03-04

Mamma, is it wrong for people to
kiss each other ?" swell, BERTHE, that
depends on who the people are" "That's
Just what pa told the servant this morn.
ng."-1fd Bits.
"As for me, hope to be cremated.
made the remark to my pastor once, who
said, with what he seemed to think was
an impressive manner: 81 wouldn't
worry about that, if had your chances u
-4Na9'k Train.
Saloon keeper (whose place of bust
ness adjoins theatre) to manager-"Yot
vas dot pill poard, Mr.. Dropcurtain ~
Manager-"H -"Hamlet." Saloon keeper
''How many acts vas dot Hamlet p"
Mannger-"Fiye. Saloon keeper with
great atisfaction)-"Five acts init dot
Hamlet !! dot vas beautiful blay."
1t seems as if the agouies never would
end. The very recentmost of them all is
for young lady to obtain corn cob,
gild it, decorate it with pink ribbons, and
place it on her pas plate at the dinner
table. This is supposed to be an aesthetic
manner of saying, "You have got to shell
ont. = Hartford Post.
"Is the King of Wurtemburg coming
over here to lecture, or sing or any.
thing ?" asked LeDiggs. "Not that ]
know Of" replied DeWiggs. "Why ~
81 see that he has just told newspaper
correspondent that he loves Americans,
aud that is bad symptom, you know
80 it is. ''-Pittsbury Chronicle.
Calino found his badness increasing in
spite of remedies, and took his barber tc
task about it. You sold me two bottles
of stuff to make the hair grow" -" 1t is
very strange it won't grow again." said
the modern Figaro Z" can't understand
| it." Look here" said Calino, ." don'i
mind drinking another bottle, but thil
must be the last"
''Pm a good deal of conundrum,
said the humoristic mail carrier. II dom
know that you are replied the gentleman
to whom he addressed his remarks
"Whnt makes YOU think you are p
"Well, because if you take away my frs
letter. then snatch away the second, thei
purloin my third and last letters, an
still male carrier. ."-Ndtioadl Weekly
The editor sat in his sanctum,
When the bore, with his modest request
Came to ask for the gift of stickful
Written up at the editors best.
The editor looked up at him calmly;
His voice II was low not gruff:
"Do you take me, my friend, for an engine
4 With nothing to do but to puff Y
III Bits.
''Can you conceive asked the pro
fessor, 'of an eternal vacuum, portion
of space unoccupied, an empty void, intt
which nothing ever enters, from which
nothing can ever come, which maintain
inyiolnte and forever its own eterna
emptiness ~ 81 can," replied the stu
dent; Il have stylographic pen."-
BRfdette.
One of our brother journalists wen
into barber shop the other day 10 hay,
his hair cut and fell asleep during tn
operation. The barber, who awoke hin
when he had finished, said to him ''Yol
are tired. understand it. It's the sam
way with me when evening comes. All
this head work is something terrible "
Paris Echo.
1t is reported that the City of Mexic
has been afflicted with scourge of mos
qhitoes to such an extent that they hav
in many cases caused illness, and, it
said. even death, by their poisonous bites
The species is large one not hithert
classified, and DR.. Penafiel, the directo
of statistics, has issued official circular
stimulating inquiry into its habits, an
suggestions as to relief. The pest is a
entirely novel one.
The lowest temperature at which tn
seeds of common cultivated plants gel
inmate has been determined by Nom
Hellriegel. Barley and oats were foun
to start in soil having temperature
, 35o, rye and winter wheat at 32o, India
, corn at 49,, the turnip at 320, flax at So
: the pea and clover at 25o, the bean an
? lupin at 3s', asparagus at 35o, the carrC
. at 3S0 and the beet at 400.
: First dude-"Yas, Chawley is goo
: enough fellow, but he is feahfully d
fawmed, you know" Second dude
"Defawmed? No, didn't know it, ]
what wayis Chawley defawmed ?" "Wh,
: Gawge, you see he has hawid great COY
Q lick wight on his forehead, so he car
t part his hair in the middle. II is II
g deuced bad, you knaw, for aside from b
Z defawmity Chawley is DANCED good fl
lah, you knaw, ,"--Danspills Bresze.