davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28
soMEBoDY.s CHILD.

Somebody's child is d~ying-dying with the
flush of hope on his young face, and some
body's mother thinking of the time when that
dear face will be hidden where no ray OF hope
can brighten it-because there was no cure for
consumption. Reader, if the child be your
neighbours, take this comforting word to the
mothers heart before it is too late. Tell her
that consumption is durable; that men are hv,
ing to-day when the physicians pronounced
incurable, because one lung had been almost
sGolden Medical Discovery has cured hun
dreds: surpasses cod liver oil, hypophosphites,
and other medicines in curing this disease.
Sold by druggists.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28
Waiting for New Confidence.

Uncle Amos, are you doing anything in
cotton now?' was asked of a colored charac-
ter in Augusta the other day.
NO, sab; ] isn't"
"You used to speculate"
"Oh, yes. sab. 1 was a bull in cotton
till L dun lost my two mules. Den | turned
bar an lost de wagin dey used to be hitched
to. At dat pint l kinder drawed off to save
my grub hoe an secure new confidence.
Dat confidence hasn't come yit, an till it
does / reckon I'd better keep on grubbin'
out stamps at so cents apiece.-WaH Street
Ne,ra
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28
Why He Had No RccOurse.

"Idon't mind the loss of my wife," said
a K~entuckian, whose better half had fled
with another man; Il long ago ceased TO
care for her. But the scoundrel, sir, has
assailed my honor. He comes, like a thief
in the night, and robs me of that which ]
hold sacred above all things-my honor. n
Have you no recourse whatever, Col
onel?"
None, sir. The scoundrel is not worth
a dollar. "-Drake's Mogdsine.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28

When you visit or leave Now York City, save
baggage, exprcssase, and % carriage hire, and
atom Al the Grand Union Motel, opposite
Grand Central Depot
6l3 rooms, ftted up at . cost Of one million
dollars, 81 and upwards per day. European
plan. Elevator. Restaurant supplied with the
best Horse cars, stages, and elevated rail-
road to all depots. Families can live better FOR
less money at the Grand Union Hotel than at
any other first-class hotel in the city.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28

WHAT a time the good old Roman arith-
meticians must have had in wrestling with
simple addition, multiplication, subtraction
and division, and when it came to reckoning
consuls at one and one sixteenth per cent.
it must have been really interesting.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28
She Rarely Gets Left.

A clever lady, o in the outskirts of
Jamaica, l.. l., was once caught in the
wrong; yet extricated herself gracefully.
She was trying to milk her first COW, her
husbands gift, and in her ignorance had
stationed herself on the lett. 1t was near
the public road. A man riding by stopped
at the novel sight and blurted out:
Madam, you are on the wrong side of
that cow"
1t was news to her, but her ready wit
came to her aid. "Yes. sir" was her pleas
ant reply, "but this isn't n common COW.
She was raised by a left handed woman"
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28

THE New York Suns assertion that "the
Democratic party is not a free-trade patty
or a protectionist party; it is the Demo-
cratic party" reminds the st. Louis Globe
Democrat Of "the case of the unfortunate
Missourian who, being exposed to raids on
his property from both armies during the
war, had a habit Of saying, when asked his
politics: I'm neither q Union man or q
Confed'rit; I'm jest nuthin', and id
little O. that"
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28

do you people speculate any?' asked a
New Yorker who was passing a day or two
in an Indiana town.
"Oh, a little; but it has become purity
risky" was the reply. "The last two spec
ulators went up for five years apiece"
For wbat?"
They broke into the postoffice to specu-
late on stamps. Wall Street Ners.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28
Henry's Carbolic Salye.

The best salve used in the world for Cuts, Bruises,
Piles, Sores. Ulcers. Salt Rheum, letter. Chspped
Hands, Cilblains, corIs, and all kinds of Skin Erup-
tons. Frcckies and Pimples. The salvei is guaranteed
to give perfect satisfaction in every case. Be sure
You get HENRY'S CARBOLIC SALVE, as all others
are but limitations and counterteits.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28

Why gu ffer piles? Immediate relief and COM
plete crre guaranteed Ask for"Rough on Piles. "
Sure cure for itching, protruding, bleeding, or
any form of Piles. soc. At Druggists or Mailed.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28

A GOOD old lady, a widow, having been
asked if she didn't think her husband
shortened his days by too much hard work,
replied: NO, l don't think he did. As
near as I can remember every one OF his
DAYS WAS lust as long as other peoples.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28
Small Fayors Thankfully Received.

Mamma, did you thank God for just
coffee and rolls?"
"Yes, Nellie"
"Umph! l wouldn't have bothered him
lust for that"
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28

IT is a question for the mathematicians
to solve how much time two women save
who risk their lives running across the
street in front of a horse car and then have
to stand and wait for the other woman who
was afraid to run.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28

AN Arkansas horsethief confessed that
he had eleven wives living, and the cruel
vigiIantes refused to hang him, but sent
him home to the bosom of his family.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28

DR.. Mary Walker has just inherited $685.
600. Sedne time ago we made the unkind
remark that DR.. Mary's trousers did not fit
her. We wish now to retract the remark.
Everybody is liable to make Mistakes
D,,,I
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28

DIS am mine poy's birthday. must
gift him somedings-what shall | gift him2
Py golly, / guess ! get his tooth pulled.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28

DR.. Pierce's SPellets"-the original little
Liver Pills" (suglr-coated)-cure sick and
bilious headache, sour stomach and bilious at
tacks, BY druggists.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28
WOMEN

are made pallid and unattractive by functional
irregularities, which Dir. Pierce's "Favorite
Prescription" will infallibly cure. Thousands
of testimonials. By druggists.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28

c~orrects offensive odors at once. Complete cure
of worst chronic cases.; also %unequaled as gargle
for diphtheria, sore throat, foul breath. Soc.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28

Lyons Patent Metallic Heel stifeners
keep new boots and shoes ~fromrunning over.
Sold by shoe and hardware dealers.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28
CROUCH ON ITCH
CROUCH ON CATARRH"

"RoEgh on Itch" cures skin humors, eruptions,
ring worm, letter, salt rheum, frosted feet, chill.
blains, itch, ivy poison, BARRIERS itch. SOC. jars.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28
She is as Sweet as a Peach,

No Opium in Piso's Cure for Consumption.
where other remedies fail. csc.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28

MosT writer's try to be comic, but
only one in . thousand can do it and
not disgust others first and themselves
soon after. Good sense is about forty
degrees ahead Of poor humor. There
is nothing that / can think Of just now
SO slow to gain public favor as good
humor at its hest. Some people are
natural born humorists and others nat.
ural-born fools, and / have known OF
such 4 thing III the two getting mixed
mp in the deal, and the fool to even
tually get away with the pot and ALL
Chicag0 Ledger.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28
Heroic Origin Of a Phrase.

HALLS Hair Remover is cooling to the scalp
and cures all itching e%ruptions.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28

SSS 81 <1Sa611 ~ WAtAs
~
NTH MiTEn.
k9f14tD 1Ud NVt MhIEUs
|aM ------
IA No1sAn, With sil-
MHooahig awav nom hes
4661ok6nA, ond snowy cap lied IN.
1ssSS1nH INNesSnhowt II that told of ~.
Nffh aonue ormnese: and too
sttSI11 6Andx. eroesed with I reptful
fSsa RI Nla1 III.
t1G3utAn6R \ : eslespinc form. would
nHd TOmAnee, of heart only
wound rocsiyed long. lon9
iS &SassS8
& r. Y6n6SR ~ M Hved under Inst rnof.
i 81 20 locked % Ire fittle
1a~3id you vii 20 sAced
~ - ~ only 20 xhen John
"a Rsrs ~ careful
- iafder. had made
ds1eoeos snd looked after tho In
1111e ant3So thAs tall 10 TIE share Of 4
~skg Ntfe. And John had never gone
N11e n~attealses shirts or undarned
s1e1eMt bed MT come hame to an untidy
H4IyX eM44F UUV4014k W1x8s ul4 tFINRs tlQY
l0ltk8 had heen his pride: and though not
j 19nonelea4ivo husband. he had boosted
ponotl1nen ~ The model housewife that
1pBt ~ home III order.
ANe underneath her quiet exterior there
- s1ory that John never dreamed OF.
I'D 9ould hAsdly have believed possible
= ~ been told. She did NOT marry for
EIovA WHEN shs VA IS. ! rosy. hapny
= Stranger came ON ) visit to their little
sNfIlnQo. and that summer was the brightest
- happiest she ever knew. Paul Gard
- WneR III strangers name: he was an
sA14toe and fell in love with the simple
sS1llaGs girl, and Won her heart; and, when
~ vent away ii the autumn, they were
sbeeEeehed@
FIl cDne again In the spring" he said.
A1xMet -, = wait for me, Matte dear"
psunised to love and wait for him
~ ~ - Of time, 4 need be-; and, with
Nnttts Gray did not tell her father and
Mekhef u her lose, Tor they had no liking
- stty folks. and had treated Paul none
- heapitabiy when be ventured inside
eneaT house.
6pg1ng-ttme camo, and true to his word,
1nul returned; he stayed only . day or two
1g ttnne.
- going away In : few weeks TO
ZR6xR - @kn2w ~ - ~tS 4Y .I.vf -.
49, snnal Do
- 49, SssSs ! ~ 'As1 'nAl o's'm roy
IAsy renswed their VOWS, and parted
!. ss-n 80 .sngcI, OWING wotds; no
~ ~,lv 49,. Srcn w q. hhnnsgcs.. ana Guy 2
1s1I3.~ ~. a r.. .I-.. ~ 49, o~u lall, a1u,
SS~ @srt -. 4ue' snd ~sl' iof
-srth. -.srA 4. "a N....~..
- ~ mshs IS. ~, sna Ms.to ~
SS-Se -c.. ~ .nas sne
sefS r.t..r - ~. ~ =. ,Csca. snen no
n nnsf - sbont II. M sims 4. !. = ...r+ y
1872 y slmo y y 70 ssets,
I.S ~ aSa ~ 80 y W. o,.,.c.a 80.
~, - slancea oyer .
..sss srd -sss rs;ts 70 aU1u ~ ~
~~~-sss ~ - NJ. ..ks uanseu
s-sssSi Tsk.r .rcshas - h.: .'n =
IS. VI co.sns hscl - 49, ~, ~
" Scx DWSA ~ m1Lxy m6! OQ,
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28
Acclimatization Of Animals.

It is not established at what time the
standardization of domestic animals be-
gan, but the dog seems t. be the first
to have attached himself to man, whose
faithful friend he still remains. His
bones, ut any rate, have been found
among the ruins of the pile buildings
in Denmark and Switzerland, with
fragments of kitchen utensils and other
refuse. Next following the dog came
the sheep, which, in its wild state, was
found almost everywhere in the northern
hemisphere, MS q dependent upon man
kind. Afterward the ass, the OK, the
goat, and the horse, in the order
named. The swine is believed to have
had its original habitation in the deep
forests of Germany, where the wild
specimens Of the ace are still preserved.
The cat appears first in historical times
in her function as q mouse catcher, and
was introduced to Europe from Egypt.
She bears no sort of relation to tho
wild cat. which is still to be found in
the forests of continental Europe, and
was little known wen as late al the
twelfth century. Among the feathered
ace the pigeon was the first to be DO
mesticated. Fowls were bred accord
ing to the records even in the most
ancient times. Geese seem to have
been first heard Of in Egypt, and appear
to have been very common in ancient
Greece. The old gray goose, which is
found everywhere in the colder regions,
is generally believed to be the first
parent of the sibilant race. Later on
came the duck as q domestic fowl, but
it is uncertain where she originated.
The swan came from the northern part
of Asia and Europe. Centuries after
ward we Americans gave to the world
the very hest of the feathered tribe.
the turkey. The campaigns Of Alexander
the Great did much toward the intro
duction Of the various domestic animals
from one century to another. The
Argonauts brought the pheasant to
Greece from the river Phasis, and
Alexander the Great sent peacocks and
parrots from Asia to Greece. Guinea
hens are natives of Africa. The old
Romans imported from their native
wilds, ~ostriches, lions, panthers,
CRATES, bears, elephants, crocodiles,
tigers, hyenas, hippopotami, the
rhinoceros, the deer, the wild ass, the
wild horse, and other animals for the
purpose not only Of forming menageries
but also for their barbaric %gladiatorial
combats, in which the poor beasts were
commonly killed under the cruelest
circumstances -Erchd,ige.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28
CROUCH ON BILE" PILLS

Start the bile, relieve the bilious stomach, thick,
aching head and overloaded bowels. Small gran
ules, small dose, big results, pleasant in opera
ton. dou't disturb the stomach. 25c.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28
The Penalty OF Speculation.

For ague, bilious, intermittent, break bone,
and swamp ~fevers, use Ayers Ague Cure.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28

A COUNTER irriiant-tle lady who
prices everything and buys nothing,
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1886-07-28
sRough on Rats" clcars out Rats, Mice. 15o
"Rough on Toothache." Instant relief. 15c.
WELLS HAIR BAISAM.

II gray, restores to original color. An elegant
dressing, softens and beauties. No oil nor
grease. A Tonic Restorative. Stops hair COM
ing out; strengthens, c~leanses, heals scalp. 500
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1886-03-04
The Value of Salt.

Severe pains in the bowels and
stomach are often speedily relieved by
the application of q bag of hot salt. A
weak solution of salt and water is rec
commended 10y good physicians as a
remedy for imperfect digestion, and
for cold in the head it is complete
cure snuffed up from the hollow of the
hand. We have known severe chronic
cases of catarrh entirely cured by per-
sistent use of this simple remedy every
night and morning for several months,
when the best efforts of the ply sicians
failed to do any good. 1t should he
used milk warm. A good handful Of
rock salt added to the bath is the next
best thing after an "ocean Dip" and
gargle of weak solution is a good and
every-ready remedy for sore throat.
As dentiirice, 1t and water is very
cleansing, and also hardens the gums.
It will also prevent the hair from fall
ing out. When broiling steak throw a
little salt on the Goals aud tho blaze
from the dripping fat will not annoy.
IA little in starch, boiled or raw, will
prevent the irons from sticking. If the
irons are rough put q little salt on
thick brown paper, lay piece of thin
muslin over it and rub the iron over it
till perfectly smooth. lux stains ore
entirely removed by the immediate APP
plication of dry salt before the ink has
dried. When the salt becomes discolor-
ed by absorbing the ink, brush it off
and apply more; wet slightly. Con-
tinue this till the ink is all removed.
III new calicoes are allowed TO lie in
strong salt water for an hour before
the first washing the colors are less
likely to fade. Damp salt will remove
the discoloration of cups and saucers
caused by tea and careless washing. A
tcaspoonful of sat in each kerosene
lamp gives much clearer, better
ixht-katherss1 Armstrong.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1886-03-04


You've ceased to love me. John, I fear
A great change has come over you;
You do not sit beside me. dear,
AID hug me as you used 10 do?
You used To praise my eyes. my hair.
And often kissed my lip AMI brow.
When We sat ON one rocking chair
Dear John. why don't you do so now3
You used Ia call me your delight.
Said you were proud my love TO win.
And kept me ut the gate ut night
Till ma would come and call me I'M.
You called me then your ownest own.
Yoar popsey pet, you did. you know:
An dearest, what has changed you SOP
John laid his paper on his knee,
And hove "a sign aud said l fear
Whatever changes there may be
You've brought about yourself, my dear.
This much, ut least you must confess:
Wheno'er my visits l would pay,
You did not meet me in the dress
In which youd been mt work all day.
Your hair was not I'm paper curls.
Your slippers tapping ON your feet
You were the prettiest of girls.
With everything about you neat.
A snow white collar then you'd wear,
And at your throat a pretty bow,
flower OF sCme kind in your hair
Now, darling, what has changed you 80 =
Boston Courier
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1886-03-04
ClOgged with Waste.

As the sewers of our cities carry off
waste inces .antly poured into them, so
the incessant waste of our bodies is
gathered up by our veins, and gotten
rid of by the lungs, liver, kidneys, and
skin. If these eliminating organs get
clogged up in any way, the waste ac-
cumulates in the blood, generating di-
sease, and, if their proper action is not
restored, resulting in death.
This waste, however, is not generally
eliminated in the form in which it is
thrown into the veins, but undergoes
chemical changes into various salts and
acids. Among these are uric acid, and
its salts known as urates. The real
trouble in Bright's disease is that the
diseased kidneys, being unable to do
their proper work, the uric acid accu-
mulates in the circulation, and poisons
the who,e system. 1t is somewhat the
same, but in lower degree, in minor
ailments, such rs bilious attacks" and
many so.called "colds."
Now cold may be not cold at all.
any more than smallpox is a cold,
though indistinguishable from it at the
b ginning. 1t may be due simply to
overeating OF animal heterogeneous food,
either habitually or from particular
excess; or to a temporary lack of ac-
customed exercise while the full, but
not otherw Sc excessive, amount of nj.
trogenous food is kept up.
In these cases, the liver, which
should prepare the heterogeneous ele-
ments of food for assimilation, and effect
other changes on our waste and re-
dundant elements, to enable the kid
neys to eliminate them, is overbur-
dened and unequal to the exigency. AT
length there is fee ing Of depression,
soreness, headache, bad breath, and a
furred tongue, and people say they
have bilious attack"
Further, when the circulation is more
or less loaded with urates, slight chill,
which might be otherwise harmless,
thus throws back on the struggling
kidneys a large share of eliminating
work belonging to the latter. The
person is said to have taken a hard
cold, but the trouble is in the over
loaded circulation. The symptoms,
when the whole eliminates in the
ATTACK" are essentially the same.
The system now unloads, during the
enforced rest of the digestive organs,
and with the aid of medicine.
Sometimes somewhat similar con-
dition results where one does not drink
enough to meet the needs of the sys-
tenn. Much of the power of mineral
springs is due not so much to any in
gredient contained in the water, as to
the water itself Says writer in the
Medical and Surgical Reporter, to
whom we are indebted for some of
the above points: "The whole system
becomes thoroughly washed out; every
particle of tissue has the efiete, waste
material all soaked out and flooded
awav -CO1lD1niO1l
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1886-03-04
Putting on "a Bonnet.

Did you ever see a woman putting on
her bonnet? No? Well, then, you have
missed the enjoyment of most inter
esting performance. A man, you know,
when he dons his headpiece, merely
claps the cover over his brow with as
little consideration as one would drop
an extinguisher over candle. He
simply puts his hat on, and that is all
there is to the operation. Light or
darkness is all one to him.
OF course, different men have differ
ent ways of putting on hat. One man
seizes his castor by the front of the
brim and slaps it on to his head with u
quick turn of the wrist, in very mut h
the same manner he would turn flap
jack; another takes hold of his hat, one
hand on the fore and the other aft, and
pulls it down with all his might, as
though his plug hat were what it looks
like, a ans head, and he we're remov-
ing the dingy night-cap from the CLAIMS
head, preparatory to eating-eating
the clam, mind You, and rot the night
cap: while third lays hold of his hat
by the gunwales, starboard and port,
and carefully adjusts it in an exact line
with the horizon, or at some favorite
angle, as the case may be. But in
either of these three instances the
operation is done mechanically, and
requires no looking-glass or other adj
ventitious aid. There is no art in it.
1t is merely an act-a matter of mere
routine.
With woman how differentl When
she puts on her bonnet poem is Gre
ated, a picture is called into being,
music is brought back to earth, and the
atmosphere that fondles her rosy
cheeks and presses her still roster lips
is saturated with her sweet sounds.
She brings forth a bandbox, her
plump arms all too brief TO encompass
its aldermanic wal I, sets it upon chair
or table, removes the lid nd wi h the
sweet smile which anything beautiful
will ever call to the features of Il els
daughters, reaches down into the
cavernous interior of that mighty box
and draws forth, very tendsrly, alittIe,
Insignificant Heterogeneous affair that
courtesy calls bonnet. To male
eye it has neither beauty nor comeliness
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1886-03-04

THE treatment New York brokers
gave new members was, years ago, SO
rough that the Governing Committee
interfered. Whoever ventured on the
floor for the first time in those days
was seized, his clothes pulled off and
himself sent into the street in his un-
der-clothes. When Nat Jones went on
he was accompanied by E. X. Willard.
q very well-known broker. Jones had
not gotten far on the floor before the
cry "New Tennessee! New Tennessee"
was raised. He was closed in upon
and his sleek plug knocked of. He
says, telling of the experience, that
seeing Willard, the man who had
promised to stand 10y him, fleeing, he
knocked in his hat because he wanted
to make some sort of show. When lit
tie Brewster went on all the men on
the floor gathered about him, and flap
ping their arms against their sides
crowed as Justify as 500 voices could.
Then Brewster's hat went off, and when
the crowd was through with him he
looked not nearly so much like a ban
tam as when he went in.