The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1886-02-04
1T WAS NOT DEAR JAMES.

ent of the New York Sun, who is a COM
mercial traveller, and on his return
from a trip he always comes to see me
and enlivens my existence by recount
of his experience ON the road.
''Well, Charley, anything newp" said
l, as Charley tilted my best chair against
the freshly-papered wall and puffed Wig.
orously at one of my stogas.
mot much" said he I'm sick of
the road. Too much of dogs life I'm
going to quit and settle down"
Iexpected this. Charley had been go
ing to do it during the four years have
known him; but he never quits, and, in
common with many more drummers,
will shake the hand of many hotel
clerk vet before he finally settles down.
whats the matter; trade dull?" / ask
ed, as Charley mechanically looked
around for the bell button. You're not
in hotel, my dear fellow" and | drew
forth bottle and glasses from the cup
board
"Well, here's luck" said Charley, as
he held his glass to the light. No,
trades pretty fair, but it isn't as it used
to be. Why, when l first went on the
road there was some fun in it. | only
carried one trunk and | could generally
get the trade to look at my samples.
Now carry three, and it is the hardest
kind of work to get man into sample
room. You don't know Billy Jackson,
do you? Travels for Chicago house.
Always registers with tooth-pick" p"
replied that | hadn't that pleasure.
"Pleasure Humph! 1t would afford
me most unbounded pleasure to get even
with him for little trick he played on
me the other day over in Illinois,
81 was going to Effingham on the
Vandalia. | got on at Casey, and the
first fellow l saw was Billy. You're
just the fellow 1 was looking for said
he. There's a pretty girl in the front
car, and think you can get acquainted
if you work the thing right. I've tried
it myself, but don't seem to catch on ,
'I've got quite a reputation among
the boys in this direction, so | easily
swallowed all Billy said and followed
him into the smoker. l thought it
mighty strange that girl should be in
the smoker; but there she was, sure
enough, and you can bet she was a
daisy. She was seated by herself when
Ientered, near two gentlemen. Thought
they eyed me rather more than was ne
cessary. However, l didn't say a word,
but quietly seated myself opposite the
dame and commenced tactics.
AFTER | had looked at her once or
twice she began to smile. Great Scott, ;
said / to myself, this is easier than l
thought for So l smiled back. This
was all the girl wanted. She began to
move nearer to me. Then she nodded
her head and smiled several times. In
all my experience | never had a girl act
that way toward me in so short a time,
and | saw there was something wrong,
although for the life OF me l couldn't
imagine what it was | wasn't going
to back out, however, so l smiled at her
again, and this time she came over and
sat down beside me. Then she called
me her dear James, and threw her arms
around my neck.
SAT this juncture one of the gentle
men had noticed came up and explain
ed. He was one of the keepers in an
asylum along the road somewhere, and
was in charge of the girl, who had gone
crazy over love affair. She imagined
every fellow who took any notice of her
to be her dear James.
'This was all wanted to know and
started for the door, but it wasn't any
use. The girl hung on and got more ex-
cited every minute.
@In the meantime one or two of the
boys had gone through the train, and
when they came back they brought
with them quite number of interested
spectators. The keeper advised me to
humor her, and did. / humored her
all L could. Every time l tried to get
away she would get violent, and didn' t
like to excite her more than / could
help as | saw was making my audience
uncomfortable. Such remarks as Juliet
has found her Romeo and the like were
frequently passed around, and was be-
ginning to think it would be great re-
lief to meet train going the other way
on the same track when we drew up at
Efingham.
''Then made break and got off the
train. The last thing heard as the
train moved out was: Come back to me,
dear Jamesr l haven't heard much
else since. Where was Billyp o, he got
off at Teutopolis. -