The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1886-02-06
ODDS AND ENDS.

A theatrical manager thanks his
stars when they don't>want all the
receipts.-Puck.
There is nothing so out Of place
rs a dime show in a dollar thcater
New Orleans Picayune.
Plantation philosophy-Ef dar
is a place o torment fur anermals,
dc balky hoss is gwine dar.-Ar-
kansaw Traveller.
"The trouble with Juliet" re-
marked the medical student, "was
that she loved wisely enough, but
tomb much. ."-Burdette.
An exchange says that a lady
with large hustle has generally a
poor form. When there is much
hustle there is little muscle.
A Vermonter has sold his wife
for six dollars. What caused the
boom in the market is unexplained.
-Pittsburg Chroniclc-Telegraph.
The most thoughtful man living
is the one who Immediately stopped
dying when reminded that his life
insurance policy had expired
Hotel Gazette.
"Too muchee by'm-by" was the
expressive way in which China
man informed a matchmaker that
his watch was going too fast
Boston Beacon.
Trying to do business without
advertising is like winking at girl
in the dark. You may know what
you are doing, but nobody else
does.-Silver Standard, Col.
A man who has been running q
newspaper in Kentucky states that
no man can succeed in that State
who does not write or print colonel
before each subscribers name.
"IIalf the books in this library
are not worth reading" said sour
visaged, hypcrcritical, novel-sati-
ated woman" Read the other
half, then," gratuitously advised a
bystander.
There is said to have been dis
covered Il kind of tobacco which if
smoked or chcwed will make a man
forget that he owes. a dollar in the
world. We have several friends
who smoke it.-Boston Post.
"What is Smith doing now?"
"He is travelling with a circus" "
"Pretty hard work, isn't it?" No,
he has nothing to do except stick
his head in the big lions mouth
twice a day. Texas Siftings.
Prohibition in Georgia is said to
have developed liquor flask with
cover made to look like book.
And, like book, its contents are
frequently red, which maketh q
full man.'-Norristown Herald.
Oysters ten inches long are said
to flourish in New Guinea. One OF
these bivalves would make ten
church stews and leave a small
piece for frying. Church people
should 90 to Guinea for their oys-
ters.
GLOW many calls did you make
to-day?" asked one young man ol
another who had played poker all
day. "Oh, l made several.
(which did you enjoy the most?'
"The call which / made on full
and found the other fellow was
bluffing on ace high"
"Sir," said the master of Balliol,
in his parting address to a distin-
guished alumnus, "your fellow
students think highly of you, the
tutors and professors think highly
of you, l think highly of YOU; but
no one thinks more hishl.y OF you
that you do of yourself"
! Was willing to do her part
"Well, may l hope, then, dearest,
that at some time l may have the
happiness of making you my
wife?" "Yes, l hope so, | am
sure" she replied; II am tired of
suing fellows for breach of prom
isc. Detroit Free Press.
A local politician in Mississippi
is said to have como to lie in ten
hours after the doctor pronounced
him dead. He must have been
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