The Cecil Whig., 1886-11-06
A LAST FAREWELL.
An Editor to the "Answer to Correspond
ents'' Column Meets An Untimely fate.
COUNTY HOSPITAL,
Chicago SeDtember. 1896

snts' Column Meets an Untimely fate.
COUNTY HOSPITAL, |
CHICAGO, September, 1886
-Manager Chicago Ledger::-44s
editor of the Answers to Correspond
ents' department Of your paper, l was
expected to call at your office last Tues
day. l didn't come, as you are aware,
nor Wednesday, nor Thursday. Today
circumstances over which | have no
control and black eye prevent my
appearing. You will probably never
see me again. Should you be called
upon to drop a tear over a lonely
mound in Potter's Field, just pencil on
the plain white slab of wood that marks
my last resting place, 'He answered
correspondents, and the next man who
writes asking you about how far below
the surface the blue clay begins, bring
him out there and club him to death.
There is last batch of manuscript
answers to questions at my former
home. | don't live there now, and !
don't care about going after them. But
you can send after them. Send that
thin, solemn man of yours who squeaks
when he walks, he's so dreadful bony.
He said last week | had soft job, and
grumbled because | earned my money
too easily. He will find my big brother
ln-law in the parlor engaged in smoking
my best cigars. My wife will probably
have the answers to correspondents IN
her pocket. Ask for them. She II give
1t to him. Oh, yes, she will and when
her brother tells him he can get back
to the office by the rear fence quicker
than by the front door, and the dog
helps them climb the gate, he'll remem-
DER all the bitter reflections he made on
me. If he don't get them and you
need new editor of this department l
wish to recommend friend of mine for
the position. He's the man who in
uoduced me to my wife. But for him
we would never have met. | have an
earnest desire to see HIM advance in
literature. There is no scheme of dia-
Dolical revenge more dear to my heart
than to have him made editor of the
Answers to Correspondents column Of
your excellent paper, for he is a mar
RED man himself. | am satisfied that
the editor of this department is usually
single man. Why l think so you
will discern later.
Please consider this letter as formal
resignation of nv position as editor. |
am not moved to this by any personal
spite, as you may think. 1t is not on
account of your book-keeper that l
leave your employ. He is an arlstocrat,
but could endure that 1t is also
true that he wears plate glass eye be-
cause common glass is pleDeian, and
he sings in the choir and practices in
the office and scares the cat, and be-
longs to the Independent Order of Red
men. All this has made me dislike
him. but | mould try and stand it. Nor
do l leave on account of the cashier,
who has pug dog and dotes on re-
verles by the seaside. They write poe
try, too. Let all that pass. l don't
resign on their account. No; it is
simply and solely because l have tried
to be thoroughly conscientious editor
of your correspondents column and
live. | have lived, but at a fearful
cost but all the money in the world
would not tempt me again to wrestle
with the innocent looking missives that
are so
F,ir fl,.AS