The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1886-10-21

56,lO2 26I
81 $50, 25f
~, II, 95t
Assuming that the Government pays out
ali the money that it receives for taxes
which is not true at present-it would ap-
pear that one-third of it is needed for the
civil service and miscellaneous needs, about
one-quarter for the War and Navy Depart.
ments and the Indians, and less than one
quarter each for pensions and interest on the
public debt For convenience we will say
that one-quarter Of the money raised is paid
out for pensions.
With these facts before him let our pen
sion-hating friend proceed to figure out how
much he contributes to the support of the
disabled soldiers and their families
The first item he encounters is beer. II
he drinks a barrel of this he indirectly con-
tributes 81 to the Treasury of the United
States, of which 33 cents go to pay the sal
aries of the President, Congressman, Cabinet
Officers, Judges, etc; % cents to pay the
Army and Navy, make harbor improve
ments and feed the Indians; 90 cents to pay
the interest on the public debt, and about
% cents to meet the disbursements of the
Pension Bureau. AS it will take a good
while for even a constitutionally-t Thirsty man
to drink up a barrel of beer, it will be ap-
parent that he does not pay his - cents
very frequently.
He pays 80 cents into the Treasury for
every gallon Of whisky he consumes, and the
remarks concerning beer apply equally to
this portion of personal expenditure.
If he is more luxurious in his tastes and
affects champagne, he must pay much more,
for the duty on dozen quarts of champagne
is 81, of which S233 will flow into the pock-
cts of the President, the Senators, Secreta-
ries, Judges, Representatives and Depart
ment clerks; S1.75 trickle through the War
and Navy Departments and the Indian Bu-
reau; S1.40 find its way to the gentlemen
who clip of coupons, and S152 90 toward
putting bread into the mouths of some SOL
dier's orphans.
Cigars, perhaps. come little nearer home
TO the pension grumbler. Every time he
smokes 1,000-which would give him about
three day for year-he contributes So to
the Treasury, of which about 81 finds its
way to the White House, or the Capitol, or
the Departments, or to pay some one for
having good time as Minister to foreign
court; 20 cents goes to the support of the
Army and Navy, and to furnish blankets and
fresh beef for the Sioux and Pi-Utes; Go
cents to the gentlemanly coupon clippers,
aud Go cents to the legless and armless vet
Grams. To bring it down finer, every time
he smokes a fragrant, full-Aavored 10-cent
cigar, he makes the Treasury three-tenths of
a cent richer, of which one tenth of a cent
goes to the ofliceholders, of which the Presi-
dent is head and chief, and the other two
tenths are divided up among the $4,000
Regular soldiers, 5000 sailors, the harbors
and rivers, the bondholders and the victims
of the war.
If his taste runs to the cheap and evil
odored cigaret, his contribution is much
more moderate. He has TO smoke 1000 of
these paper denominations before the Treas
ury is so cents the gamer. There are 20 of
them in package, and consequently so
packages make 1000 Every time he poisons
the air with one he donates one-half mill to
the expenses of the Government, and of this
one-eightieth of cent is applied to the
relief Of the men who followed the flag
through the awful carnage of the Wilder
ness. He has to rot his lungs with 80 pack
ages Of the Greaser invention before he con-
tributes whole cent to the support of the
dependent ones of the man who was shot
through the heart at Shiloh.
Suppose that he is still more economical
in his indulgences and smokes a pipe. The
duty on smoking tobacco is eight cents a
pound. The amount he would pay into the
pension fund by day or weeks steady
smoking would be so small that we have
not the heart to make the microscopic di-
vision required to state It,
1T requires but little talking to get SUBJ