davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1886-09-24
ODDS AND { NDS.

The country seat that always
rents-the barbed.wire fence
Boston BeacoR.
\ man never brags Of how much
he owes to the assessors.-BostOR
Courier.
A temperance mOycment-shOy.
ing the jug under the counter.
Merchant Irdrcicr.
A wise sausage dealer never uses
the semi-profane expression, "Dog-
gone lD-Ac,c York JourHdi.
The English alphabet is tolerably
virtuous. Twenty Of the letters
have never been in prison. Yes
but look what a lot of them are now
in penitentiary.
"The cOckroaches in this house
are remarkable versatile" said an
actor at hotel table, picking up a
biscuit. ~ notice that they ap.
pear in different rolls every morn.
ingp
The man who is right seldom says
much. 1t is the man who is wrong
that talks, and talks less with the
view Of changing the opinion ofthe
other than to convince himself that
he is right. AS Puck says, "What
fools these mOrtals be w-B0stOn
Courier.
"Papal whatdid the preacher mean
by that word 'purbIindP' asked
Daisy of her father on their way
from church. 81 know" interrupted
Freddie. "Tve often heard people
say, when they heard cats singin',
that they didn't see where the purr
came from, and | guess that's purr-
blind, ,ain'tit,p ,pa?7- Yonkers Gd@ette.
"What pay do you get!" asked a
man who had just arrived in West.
ern Dakota town, of the Marshall.
"Twenty five dollars 4 month";"
"Isn't that pretty small wages|
"Oh, yes, it would be if had to
work all the time. You see when
ever the cowboys come in and get
drunk, and the air begins to get
sort OF thick and sultry like with
bullets, | 90 home and crawl INTO
the cellar. They are here pretty
frequent, so | have an easy time of
it"-EsteIIRe Bell.
They had just been married. He
seized her hand and said in 4 low,
tremulOus voice at was your in
nate modesty and apparent indllfer-
erce, dearest Sallie, that made me
register a vow to marry You at all
hazards" Yes she sighed, "but
/ slipped up on three or four Of the
most eligible young men in Austin
before found that the only way
to rope in a galOOt was to come the
innate modesty and total !ndiiler-
ence racket on him.'-TcrdS SG-
ings.
A story is told of Sheridan, HIM
selfan Irishman, that one day, when
coming back from shooting with an
empty bag, he did not like to 90
home completely empty, aud seeing
a number of ducks in a pond, and
a man or farmer leaning on a rail
watching them, Sheridan said :
"What will you take TO: shot at
the ducks!' "Well, he said, 81 Will
take half a sovereign "DOne !"
said Sheridan, and he fired into the
middle of the iloci, killing a dozen.
81 am afraid you made bad bar.
gain "Well, | don't know said
the man, "they weren't mine
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1886-09-24
Saved His Life.

Mr.. ID. l.. Wilcoxson, of Horse
Cave, KY, says he was, for many
years, badly afflicted with Phthisic,
also Diabetes the pains were al
most uncomfortable and would some
times almost throw him into con
vulsions. lie tried Electric Bit
ters and got relief from first bottle
and after taking six bottles, was
entirely cured and had gained in
flesh eighteen pounds. Says he
positively believes he would have
died, had it not been for the relief
afforded by Electric Bitters. Sold
at fifty cents a bottle by b. Schmitt.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1886-09-24
DR. b. F. MAPHIS & BRO.
- lists"

oryioEs: Woodstock and sAumsUlie' virginia
In woodstock. ist aud Sd weeks Of esch month";
In s.umsville "a and 4tn weeks. ..,.-
Those in need Of nrst class Dentistry ~ "'o'''
ate prices will do veli t. cali az 10
Faii sets Of Artificial teeth from '''VV'o ''''O''
$500 and 5000 ,,.... s,oo silver
slIings from 75c. 20 500 ,, o.,a,,a
Artihcfai teeth put up on soma g9n uo'I 49,
casloid Combination. Celleloid and iH,pDsf lslss
I3old And Porcelain rivotlns' eAsps, s, ~ ns-
- teeth. and correcting the irregalArlt'ee'
aIl.Fork warranted hrst class ,..., 4,
~ -resth rtraoted absolutely without pan ~
-he .so Of Nitrous oxide Gas y
Nav u. '54-tf T.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1886-09-24
A Young wife Abducted.
HER HUSBAND PO WERLESS
TO AID HER.

DRAGGED FROM A CARRIAGE BY
RUPFIANS-SHE FINALLY ES-
cAPEs WHILE HER CAPTORs ARE
AT SUPPER--H l. r. 7 L l G II 7
THROUGH A MICHIGAN FOREST.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1886-09-24
PATENTS

obtained for new inventions, or for i'm
provements in old ones, Caveats Infringe
ments. Trade Marks and all patent busi-
ness promptly attended to.
INVENTIONS THAT HAVE BEEN
REJECTED may still. in most cases, be
patented 10y rs. Being opposite the U. 5.
Patent Onice and engaged in Patent
business exclusively, we can secure pat
ents in less time than those who are re-
mote from Washington.
when inventors send model or sketch
we make search in the Patent Office, and
advise as TO its patentability, free ot
charge. Correspondence confidential
fees reasonable, and no charge unless
patent is obtained.
We refer by permission TO the City
Postmaster, and 10 the Superintendent Of
the Post Oflicc Money Order Division in
Washington. For special references,
circular, advice, terms, &c, address
&. A. SNOW 4 CO.,
Opposite Paent Office Washington. ID. q
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1886-09-24
DR A. MA X TN
SURGEON &@ DENTIST.

Respectfully Informs the public thai
be has resumed the practice oi ms pro-
sssion ocders left. at the store OF +. o
gravei. in Woodstock. wil'Ieceive pro-
mpt attention
Nay IS, '54-tf.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1886-09-24
nR. T. =. LOCKE,
IL SURGEON DENTIST.
0FFIcE; Main St, OPP the Court House,
WnnnsrncK NIRGINIA

WOODSTOCK, VIRGINIA.
A rtifcial teeth inserted in any manner
aesi, ed Careful attention given to fill
ir,, a, Nd extracting Parents should bring
ths,rc q hlldren and have their teeth ex-
amined and procure information that will
- of ere " value in after life.
VIII via It Edinburg regularly on the lst
md Ard Tn, asdays Of each month. at which
t,raa / can n found at the residence OF
Mr.. Jacob z. tinker
All WORK gua ranteed. Prices moderate
July 10, Sly
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1886-09-24

OFT. ,. wALKKR. dSo' L. MILL"
[ITALKER & KELLER.
w ATTORNEYS-AT-LAW,
WoODsroCK, NiROlNIA.
tT- Office on Court Street.
One member Of the firm will be in Mt.
jackson from 3 o'clock Thursday after
noon, until Saturday night Of each week.
Ofice over Irwin's Drug Store.
Nay 's8-u.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1886-09-24
SHENANDOAH HERALD
ADVERTISING RATEs.
nR. II. If. IRWIN
N

nR. II. II. IRWIN
~ Mt. JACKSON, Va,
Graduate Of College Physicians g. Sur
geons late resident physician at Mary
land General Hospital, Baltimore recent
assistant Demonstration Of Anatomy at
Baltimore Medical College, offers bis pro-
Ies'ionai services 70 the people of Nj.
JacAsOn aud vicinity.
~ Orders left at lrwin's pharmacy will
receive prompt attention. (aug. .30-3m
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1886-09-24
sHENANDoAH HERALD
is PUBLISHED WEEKLY BY
THE HERALD CONF Y

Subscription, ONE DOLLAR AND HALF
per year payable in advance.
Subscriptions not raid at time Of sub
scr bing may run thee months lor To-
~ co yill be charged without variance in
any case. ..,....
nature will be inserted only as adVertise-
ments.
THE HERALD JOB OFFICE,
ia complete in every respect. Edltorial
room. business office and steam presses De-
tween Railroad and Main streets.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1886-09-24
Oyster SaIooni

" here ladies and gentlemen can tastesome
Of the very finest Of these delicacies.
THOMAS BANKS,
Jan. %, 'rJ-tf Opposite Welsh's Hotel
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1886-09-24

have fitted up my shop In the latest
style, where customers can get a shave
shampoo or ther hair cut or curled at ali
times have In same building an
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17
Royalty On the Road.

When Queen Victoria travels the
train is made up of twelve cars. includ-
ing two royal saloon carriages, which
are placed exactly in the middle. There
is electrical communication throughout
and special telegraph operator goes
along. Then lookout man is placed on
the engine tender, with his face toward
the rear Of the train, so as to be ready to
receive and communicate with the
driver any signal that might be given,
and the guard in the front van has to
keep his face constantly toward the rear
of the train on the lookout for any sig
nal from the guard in the rear, or from
any of the attendants accompanying the
train. Beyond this, surfacemen are sta
toned at all the level crossings, and no
vehicle Of any kind is allowed to pass for
half any hour before the royal train is
due. .....
The goods traffic also on both lines is
suspended during the progress of her
majesty, and the speed of the passenger
trains proceeding in an opposite direc-
ton is reduced to ten miles an hour
while the royal train is passing them on
the other line. The queens suite con-
sists Of ladies Of honor, male and female
servants, dressers, physicians, her per-
sonal friends, officials of the road, and q
number of other persons. At every
block signal box the safe passage of the
train is telegraphed before and behind.
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17
where to Dig the Well,

Let us remember that q well will drain
an area, with diameter equal to twice
its depth. Therefore, q well twelve feet
deep will drain an area, the diameter of
which is twenty-four feet, that is to say
that it will drain the surrounding soil
for twelve feet in every direction. Oh.
viously then the privy should be more
than the depth Of the well away from it,
and more than this again, il it is pro-
posed to place it on higher level,
which, however. should never be done.
The well should be lined inside thor.
oughly with mortar, so that percolation
can not occur between the crevices Of
the bricks, and It should be well covered,
90 that surface drainage can not get into
it. for you want TO drink water that has
come into the well from the bottom,
after it has been purified by filtration
through the earth. Thus then these are
the precautions to be observed in locat.
ing and building your well in the coun-
try. How about the city? Well water
in the city should never be used; the
sources Of contamination are too numer
Gus and too hidden to be avoided
Annals of Hygiene. ..
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17
Size Of the French Army.

France has already larger army than
Germany, and the Germans admit that
the French have $4,000 more men in
their army than they have. The French
have 576 more guns than the Germans,
but the German cavalry is superior to
that Of the French. The French army
on peace footing amounts to about
500, 900 men, but on a war footing it can
call together over 1000, 600 Of soldiers
who have been fully trained, 100, 900
more who have been partially trained,
and over 100000 who are unframed.
Its army on war footing would num-
Der over 1000, 1000, or fully 20 per cent.
Of the male population of France. New
York Tribune,
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17
New York Beefstsak Club.

Once month the members of the New
York beefsteak club, with loosened
wristbands and collars. gather around
a long table and cast lots for the prize
beefsteak-a double porterhouse. weigh.
ing never less than two and half mol
more than three pounds. Then. with
interested and often with envious eyes,
they watch the lucky winner as he
tackles it. If he eats it to the bone they
rejoice, because he is an honor to the
club; but if he fails they rejoice also
for he must then order basket of wine
for their benefit.-Chicago Herald.
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17
IN A DUTCH PRISON.
The Penitentiary Rather an Embeliish-
msut Thar a ns.a1ursment.

The Penitentisry Rather an Embeiiish-
ment Than Disagreement.
A prison in Holland is rather an en-
bellishment than a Disagreement to
town, at lest such is the fine new peni-
tentiary at Leeuwarden, one Of the most
famous prisons in Holland, and a model
of its kind. 1t is completely built of
stone, bricks, and iron, consequently
fire-proof; staircases, halls, and work
shops are built with mathematical pre-
cision and in such manner as to permit
of constant surveillance. The yards are
large and spacious, all the rooms white
washed from top to bottom and well
ventilated, the inner and outer walls
even bearing witness to the proverbial
Dutch cleanliness. The steps and pass
ages are equally clean, and you would
look in vain for soiled spot or grain OF
dust. Not cracked or tarnished pane
Of glass can be found in the whole build
ing. Everything is washed, brushed,
and waxed with care we might well
envy in many of our American homes.
The dormitories are regularly scrubbed
every day and well ventilated. Their
aspect is, however, curious. Each con-
sists of a large white-washed, asphalt
fioored room, in the center of which is
an immense iron-trellised cage, armed
on the inside with spikes. This cage is
divided into over 100 cells, each separ-
ated by sheet-iron walls; each has
its bed, consicting of thin mat
tress, a pillow. pair of sheets
Of course texture. and two coverlets.
Each night the prisoners are locked in
these narrow cells, and thus repose per-
fectly isolated from each other. All
around the dormitory run iron water
pipes, with taps fixed at intervals, at
which the conyicts are supposed to per-
form their ablutions. Water is general
throughout the whole prison. and is to
be met with on each story. Baths,
which the prisoners are compelled to
make use of at stated times, are on the
ground floor.
The prisoner has three meals per day.
In the morning, lukewarm milk and
water and "A piece of dry bread; at mid
day, soup composed of vegetables; in
the evening, coffee and brown bread.
Sometimes they are allowed small
quantity of meat, but more often bacon.
The prisoners, however. can improve
upon this food by the money they earn.
They have, in fact, small interest in
their work, four-sixths of which is at
their disDosal the balance being very
properly capitalized and handed to them
on their dismissal. Everything is con-
Quoted with military discipline in q
Dutch prison, which allows neither Of
ill-will nor question. The dungeons. a
kind of subterranean cells, are for the
unruly, and irons for the mutinous. No
conversation is allowed between the
prisoners during hours Of work. Perfect
order prevails, as a rule, and attempts
at escape are events unknown.-Brook.
Iyn magazine. -t. .r-.|l,, .l
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17
AFTER the close of the regular serv.

AFTER the close of the regular serv-
ice In Plymouth Church, Brooklyn, a
few Sundays ago. q delegation Of Chris
tianized Dacotah and Choctaw Indi-
ans, under the charge Of a missionary,
sang religious hymns in their native
tongue, and the head man made an
address. which was interpreted to the
audience. Mr.. Beecher In introduc-
ing the Indians, said that the great
work of evangelizing the Indians was
progressing very rapidly and was pro.
ducing remarkably successful results,
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17
The Bite of a Wolf.

Notwithstanding reports to the con-
trary, believe that there never was a
dog that could master full-grpwn
wolf. There are few dogs that will at.
tempt to fight wolf, and when they do
they are badly cut up, if not killed out.
right. The bite of a wolf is not like the
bull dog grip, but it is succession Of
snaps, which are about as quick as
lightning. The wolf leaps back and
forth over a dog, his jaws swapping like
a steel trap. and the dog is cut up as
with knives in less time than IL takes tc
write it.-Cor. Cleveland Leader.
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17

LAWRENCE DONOVAN. the crank
who jumped from the Brooklyn and
Niagara bridges. has challenged John
L. Sullivan for o four-round contest.
He attempts to explain the idiocy OF
this challenge on the ground that he
has already given two exhibitions of
his sand" and that he has enough
left TO stand before the big bruiser.
He will find he needs something more
than sand II the meeting should ever
occur.
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17
MUST FIGHT WITHOUT coloRS.
The Oraor Issued to British Soldiers
The Perils of the Color Guard.


The Oraer Issued to British Soldiers
The Perils OF the Color Guard.
Perhaps may az we'll state here Q
fact, which think Ia not generally
known outside of military circles. On
our landing in Egypt for the Soudan ex-
pedition all colors Of regiments were left
on board the fleet so that British SOL
diers for the first time in history went
into action .unaccompanied by 1Old
Glory" whose silken folds had been
wont for centuries to flap among the
bayonets and sabers Of Its defenders-in
some cases jaunty and gay in the brav-
cry of new material and bullion
wrought device, in others, simply a
grim, war-battered old emblem, but in
either case dear as life's pulse to each
and every one in the regiment to which
each color respectively belonged. It
may be recellected that after the battle
of Maiwand, in Afghanistan, in which
a certain infantry regiment was am
bushed, but could have escaped were it
not that the enemy devoted all his en-
ergies to the capture of the colors, the
men stood by them in defense, and SO
We're completely nnihilated-wiped off
the army list as it were. OF course,
the colors were lost. This decided the
war office, and the order was issued that
henceforth British soldiers must fight
without colors.
1t is, perhaps, not generally known
that in the British service the colors
two to each regimenD were always
carried by commissioned officers-gen-
orally the juniors rs to service. These
colors were escorted by color guard
consisting of the first or color-sergeants
of each company. who were also the
pay sergeants. Now, in action, in case
the color-bearers were shot down, there
was always great emulation on the part
of other officers to seize and bear them
aloft thus offering themselves as need
less targets for enterprising sharpshoot.
ers. This sort of thing might be re-
peated till all the officers were placed
hors du combat, when Of course. the real
backbone of the regiment (the non-com-
missioned staff would be expected to
take command; but If the color-bearers
were swept off it would be quite likely
that the color-guard shared their fate,
when the regiment would quickly be
come like ship without either rudder
or pilot. Reasoning thus the mag
mates of the war office decided that the
carrying of colors entailed needless
mortality among the most efficient men,
bers of regiment, therefore the prac.
tice must cease, as the army could fight
well enough without them. The strong.
est part of it all is, the rank and file
now cheerfully coincide with the views
of their superiors. Pardon the digres.
sion, but think it was necessary.
The day preceding the battle Of Tel-el.
Kebir general orders commanded that
in the coming advance no bugles were
to be sounded, no drums beaten and nc
loud words of command given; whistles
were to be used instead. British Soldier
in Boston Commercial Bulletin. .l
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17

THE action of the eastern trunk
lines in advancing freights on live
and dressed meats which they did in
March last, has been strongly con.
demned by resolutions recently passed
by the National Stock Growers Asso.
citation Of America, and by the Chi.
cago live stock exchange. The atten.
tion of Congress and state legislatures
has been called to the fact, with view
to induce such legislation as will pre-
vent Its recurrence.
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17
Weight Of an Infant.

An infant loses from three TO six
ounces in weight during the first four to
six days after birth; by the seventh day
it should have regained its birth-weig ght;
from that to the fifth month it ought to
gain about five ounces per week, or
about six drams a day; after the fifth
month about four drains day; at the
fifth month it ought to have doubled its
birth-weight, and in sixteen months
guadrupled it.-Journal Of Reconstruc-
ton.
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17
Friday, December ~, 1886.
REDUCTION OF TAXES.

Secretary Manning, In the annual
treasury report. dwells at length upon
the necessity of reducing taxes, and
President Cleveland in briefly discuss.
ing the same subject in his message to
Congress appears to coincide with the
secretary in this matter That both
men are honest In their convictions
admits of no question whatever, aid
the views they express are also the
views Of millions of their countrymen.
among whom are to be found men of
the highest ability and the most wide
and thorough culture. To us, reason-
ing upon the same subject, the conclu-
sions they reach seem veritable re-
dnctio ad absurdum. whose absurdity
needs only to be put in order to be
clearly manifest.
The excess of receipts by taxation
over expenditures, in other words. the
surplus revenue, for the fiscal year
ending June 80, 1856. was about nine
ty million dollars. This surplus reve-
nue. Is considered dangerous to the
country as nation, and its collection
indicates the imposition OF burden
of taxation unjust and grievous to the
people. But is this SO? Is not any
such assumption totally unfounded
and without any truth in fact! Letting
alone n very generally accepted and
prevailing opinion among men that an
individual whose receipts exceed his
expenditures to such degree that he
can yearly lay by surplus, is fortu.
nate one, and disregarding the very
obvious fact that government Ia but
the agency of u number ofindividuals,
let us examine the assertion that &C.
emulation Of this surplus revenue isa
grievous burden of taxation to the peo-
pie.
The population of the United States
during the last fiscal year when the
surplus revenue amounted to ninety
millions Of dollars. was in round num-
bers sixty millions. The surplus reve-
nue., therefore. represents q burden of
taxation of only one dollar and half
upon each individual per annum. or
considerably less than one half cent a
day. Now, while there are many per-
sons in this country. wage earners
whose daily bread is got only by their
daily labor. TO whom even this half
cent daily is an item of moment. yet
their numbers are practically nil COM
pared with the balance of the people
whose grievous burden of taxation re-
sulting in this surplus revenue Is less
than half cent daily. In all candor,
can tax Of 1886 of cent per day be
considered a agrieyous burden to any
one individual, even If 1t 10 In excess
of absolutely necessary and perfectly
justitiable taxes? And where Is the
individual who would be greatly or
even sensibly relieved by liftin from
his shoulders this unnecessary but al
most infinitesimal burden of less than
half a cent per day?-Washington
Gazette.
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17

Capt. Carrie, for thirty years an officer
in the trans Atlantic service, believes
that the bodies Of passengers who die st
sen should be buried at sea, not becauss
OF any superstition on the part OF the
common sailor, but because the health
and cheerfulness of all on board demand
it -Harper's Bazaar.
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17
Abraham LINCOLN. stepmoth.r.

Mrs. Sarah Bush Lincoln, the step.
mother of Abraham Lincoln and whose
portrait is given in The Century, once
said: Il had son John who was raised
with Abe. Both were good boys, but
must say, both now being dead, that
Abe was the best boy ever saw or ex'
pect to ee."-Detroit Free Press.
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17
Mr.. oladstone,. "rempls., ,

Mr.. Gladstone calls his study the
Temple Of Peace" There are three
writing desks there. At one Mr.. Glad.
stone docs his political writing, at an.
other his literary work, and the third
belongs 10 Mrs. Gladstone. Cleveland
Leader.
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17

1t takes 200, family Bibles to sup
ply the demand in the United State
every year. Besides there are millions
OF small Bibles Observation-Disclosures
Constitution. rl..
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17

Teach self-denisl and make its prac-
tice pleasurable, and you create for the
world a destiny more sublime than ever
issued from the brain of the widest
dreamer.-Sir Walter Scott.
Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-12-17

There are in the employ of the gov
ment, mostly in the postofiice depart
ment $50 Smiths, 800 Browns, SEQ John
sons, and 210 Joneses.