Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-12-04
BRIGHT Ri is.

I'VE stamp Liberty on our money BECAUSE
money gives lib rty." says an exchange,
That is all right as far as 1t goes. Now let
him tell US what to stan p on Liberty so that
1t will give US money.-Ae'c W k dDhfc.
miss DE JAuNs is very self possessed
yonug lady. isn't she?" remarke jackson.
Yes. she ought TO be-" replied Dickson.
why so?"
''Because have asked her to be mine three
times and she said mo- each time. '-Aefchdnt
Tr'Ue'er.
FRIEND Ito young lawyer)-DId you sue
coed in convictlng your manF
Young LAWYER (gloOmly)-No; he was &C
Quilted. In anity did IL.
Friend He never acted like crazy man.
Young LAWYER He isn't. It's the jury who
were crazy.--Ihe 0udge, y.,..s.
BoLB, BAD BOY in Illinois thrust a couple
of PLUS If, tobacco into q big Jug Of whisky he
found IN Ihe horse sheds daring a church sup
per. And the next day the local physicians
reported seYenteen cases OF ice cream pol on
ng, all men. and the poor women who made
thu ice cream erred their innocent eyes out
bout it.-BHrdefke. .--I
81 SEE that one of the new rules of the ma
tional game provides that where batsma m
is hit by pitched ball he is given his base
Now, what is TO prevent man getting hit on
purpose to get his base"
"Have you ever been hit by pitched Dall?"
Never"
81 thought not "-T1e Rambler.
GETTING too Famili ar-Hoiel Clerk-Front
go to Earl Haldousic's apartments and see
what he wants.
Il II Boy IRE urningl He wants you to call
him early o-mOrrow morning.
Hotel Clerk-Wants me TO call him earlyP
Well, he's getting familiar on short acqualnt-
ance, seems to me.-Itd Bits.
THE old gentleman who has the finest claret
in the xii gdom ito hostess, who thinks they
give you The incest win at a pastry cookie
Well, SO | asked HIM to dinner. and when
they brought in the coffee | looked at him,
and give you my wor | saw HIM slipping 1t
with my Laftte-at the same time. if you
please-the same timel
Ho tess-How dread III, dear Mr.. Stockb bin !!
That delicious coffee of yours!-PuRch.
MISS ETHEL-Y es. indeed. we girls are fully
alive 10 the justice of the popular criticism on
chaitering women, and that is the reason we
organized our Thought Club.
Mr.. Blank Thought Club2
"Yes; and it's doing US such world of
good /"
mo. indeed. Why. at the last meeting we
talked for five whole hours on the advantages
of silent medltatlon."- Omaha Void.
Miss Hubble "a fair Bostoniap)-I suppose
you lea ned the language before you came to
this countrg?
New York Dude-Bai Jove, don tcherknow,
why--er, what-er nawshunawlty dye
faWncy l belong to-erf
Miss Hubbie-It's difficult to say. I've not
yet been in Europe, but l thought for for
guage IN the world with great skill.
New York Dude-Thanks, awfully much!
Pm very much beholden to you.-Bosto'e
Bsdc, N.
doctor, Pm afraid am breaking down,
l have frequent headaches, my appetite is
impaired, sleep very little, and am morbid
and melancholy . ,,,,,l
What is your business. What do you doP"
Nothing, Just now. am on my vacation"
'Well, you 20 right baeg TO your business
and get TO work as soon as you can. YoT'n
kill yourself loafing around this way. You
peed the Inspiration Of your business. What
is your occupation any howY'
II write pies for Presidential Inaugural
tions, but there isn't much doing in my line
just now. "-Burdette.
| LIKE the pies that Nellie bakes,
The light. sp crust, the heart delicious
OF spiced fruit between the fake
All this seems healthy and nutritious.
While tasting one the other day,
My teeth struck something not elastic;
And soon within my palm there lay
A golden ring saved from the gastric.
From Ne lies finger" murmured l.
Then looking DER the metal mellow,
l nearly tainted to descry
Tn initials of another fellow!
-RdHbler