Daily Yellowstone journal., 1886-07-01
SILENCE yDRDAN'S FATE.
A FAIRY STORY OF CINCINNATI
LIFE IN THE SPRING OF '4e.

How a Desperate Terrorized the worthy
Citizens of Porkopolis-A Had Party
and No siistake-The Little Drummer
from the East--Nemesis.
"Why, bless your heart" the colonel
went on to say, Il have seen thirty stall
wart men engaged in conversation on
matters of public import, and, would you
believe itS although the subject under dis
cussion was pursued for eighteen hours,
not u man in the crowd dared utter word
but Silence Jor,ionl The way he terror
lied the worthy citizens Of this good city
was something marvellous beyond COM
pare. he would enter the most palatial
residence in town, and, after kicking the
elegant and costly chandeliers TO pieces,
he would compel the inmates Of the house
10 prepare him the most elaborate meal
that money aud industry could devise.
Then he would kick the top off all the
pianos in the house, and lie down in the di-
lapidated instruments for an after-dinner
nap with his boots on. When he walked
downthe street the horse cars had to leave
the tracks and travel on the opposite side
of the street selected by him for prone
made.
He was a bad party, and no mistake.
But what ! started to tell you was this:
An etfeminate-looking young fellow EN-
ployed as travelling salesman for an east
ern house reached town one day. He met
Silence jordan, the riproaring terror OF the
Mississippi valley, and the terror asked
him what his name was. The drummer
replied that ii was Willie Phillips A look
OF ineffable disgust swept over the entire
physiognomIcal contour of the bully.
what are You doing here, sonny,"
growled the hideous wretch.
None Of your Internal - business!"
was the astounding reply, and the little
drummer at the same moment nonchal-
antly struck an old-fashioned lucifer
match. The crowd asse mbled stood para
lyzed with fear as the gigantic ruilian
1egau 60 gather himself up for spring
at his helpless prey. As the flame
splutterei on the md of the match
held by the diminut drummer he
flipped the stick With one OF his deli
cate lily-white fingers, and tiny globule
of the birthstone shot fairly and squarely
into The left eye of the ponderous
rowdy, who was oa the point of sweeping
the Liliputian from the face Of the earth.
ANOTHER SPARK OF FIERY BRiMsToNE.
AS the burly hummer clapped both
hands upon the optic that received the ter
rible shock the little drummer tlipped the
match once more and another spark Of
the fiery birthstone flew with merciess
precision slap dab into the other eye OF the
numerous fend, who now, instead of
seeking 10 deyour the puny boy that stood
before him cuolly lighting a cigarette, was
rolling on the sidewalk writhing in the
most painful agony, yelping with all the
power OF his tremendous lungs the while
he endeavored, but futilely, TO allay the
agonizing misery that was rackng his
very soul and dethroning his reason itself.
l never witnessed more terrible specta-
Gle in ali my varied experience as trav-
eler and observer of men and things. His
powerful frame shivered and swayed, and
his ponderous limbs threshed about like
unto the wild gyrations of the hideous cut
tie fish in mortal combat. His
piercing screams resounded afar, and
and soon the entire population
gathered to witness the mad rawlings and
violent contOrtions Of the erstwhile mon
arch of hell. But there was none so poor
TO do him reverence, and soon il was dis
covered that the proud vuture of few
minutes before was blind-stone blind.
when the joyous tidings of the awful
fate OF the autocratic enemy of the citizens
of our beautiful burg were spread around
glad shout OF victory rent the air, and
the boniires were lighted and the bells
pealed in token of the happy deliverance
from the plague that had blighted the
whole city. For, finding that his vocifer-
Gus pleadings for aid and assistance in the
shape Of an eye-wash were unheeded, ST.
lence Jordan staggered TO his feet, and,
quakinG in his frightful agony, remarked
that it was bridge time with MIN, and,
stridiH.s 10 the Suspension, dung himself
into the turbulent waters below. never 10
rise again. "-Cineinnati Enquirer.