davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23
TAXABLE PROPERTY.
Theodwinkle GOOdfornOught's Tax Dupli-
cate for the Current Year.

Theodwinkle GOodfornought's Tax Dupli-
cate for the Current Year.
Mr.. Assessor, the following statement
of my taxable property l am ready to
swear Qike SMOKEY is too true:
PLEASURE CARRIAGES One baby
buggy; but consider it far from being
a pleasure carriage to me.
LIVE STOCK-One cat and four kit
tens. One wife's mother; mine by
right of storage.
STEAM VEssELs-One teapot and one
full-rigged wash-boiler.
MONEY ON HAND-Silver half-dOllar
with hole in it; worked three days to
invisibly plug it. but failed. In bank.
5000, 900, less S135 owe there.
NOTEs-Seventy-six; but other men
hold them.
Matrimonial; $40 invested;
subject to excessive taxation. Nom
transferable.
LUMBER-Half-bOx matches.
REAL ESTATE-One corner lOt-in
graveyard, one patch in potatoes, two
patches in elbows, one residence-gained
in this State.
MONEY LOANED ON PLEDGE-NOne;
but plenty borrowed on it.
VALUE OF ARTICLES HELD THIS YEAR
Held horse, valued at 81 900, few
minutes one day last month; while owner
went into store.
JEWELS - Set superbly mounted
clothes-pins. Richly embossed Etrus-
can dray-pin. Set of imitation brass
cuff-buttOns. One elegantly inlaid black
eye. warranted to wash.
MUSICAL lNSTRUMENTS-One cOmbi-
nation, over-seaming. duplex, eight
octave, high-pressure jewsharp. One
no-stringed. self-tuning. upright wash
board. One high-toned. long-range,
base rocking baby.
Total ,Sg1
Deducting amount Of dobtS.... M.26S
Amount left-vcry far left..... Ss.4N
-IH-Bits.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23
Horse-FIesh in England.

Hippohagy is now seldom heard of.
A few years ago it was strongly advo-
Gated in many quarters; but the British
public. although ready to swallow al
most any thing in the way of food put
before it, never took kindly to horse
flesh, and turned deaf ear to the per-
suasions of those who recommended
the adoption of this kind of diet It is
probable, however, that horse-fesh is
often eaten unawares, and that its con-
sumption is far more common than is
generally imagined. Butchers whose
consciences are not tender occasionally,
it is fear ed, sell horse-Aesh as ordinary
meat to unsuspecting customers. An
attempt is about to be made to put mat
tiers in this respect on more satisfacto-
~ footing. At q meeting held for the
purpose Of eliciting an expression Of
opinion from the butchers of Manches-
ter and Stafford with regard to the sale
of horse-fesh as human food, it was de-
cided to appoint a committee for the
purpose Of getting an act Of Parliament
passed to compel butchers who sell
horse-fesh to label it As such.-SG
James Gazette.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23
THREE OF A KIND.
AAanias Outdone by Trio Of PassenGef,
In the 0moklnI Car.

Ananias Oatdoae By . Trio Of Passengers
In the smokinG Car.
They were snow-bound on Western
railroad. and killed time-and truth
with stories which. by the antipodal
law of contrarics, related to phenome-
nally fast trips ON the rail. Some Of the
passengers in the '.smoker" confined
themselves to their experiences, while
others, less conscientious but equally
generous. .'chipped i'm anecdotes that
would have made the hair of sane To-
connective engineer stand ON end. FL
nally, when It was officially announced
that the train was ''stalled" for another
twenty-four hours, competition in the
Ananias business waxed SO warm that
only three men ''stayed in" Said the
first:
Il had the good luck to get on the
special train of . Presidential candidate
in 1884, during the heat of the CAM
paign. He had to open one meeting
and close another on the same evening,
and the two were sixty miles apart. ]
was on the train that did it, and we
went so fast that the mile-posts ran to-
gether like picket fence-so close, in
fact. that the only man on board who
got the figures correct was an instanta-
neous photographer"
No one smiled. In point of fact, AT
this stage of the game beverages were
at premium, while the second gentle
man remarked, with the faintest sus-
piciOn of contempt:
by coincidence not at all curious
!, too, had ride with Presidential
candidate, and special dispatches which
he received showed that he must make
an awfully previous sort Of trip to
reach the next town before the enthu-
siasm for him should get away. We
had train of three cars and, l give
you my word of honor, we went SO fast
that, part of the way, by actual meas
urement, the rear of the last car was
only four feet behind the front of the
cOw-catcher.
"Gentlemen," said No. 8, coming up
with radiant courage, ''yOur old fOgy
experiences remind one of the good old
days of stage coaches and canal-boats.
But it was my good fortune last fall to
make a fairly quick trip from Bangor to
Portland. I'm giving you the straight
Kennebec river ice-hOuse tip, when
say that in four minutes from the time
we fairly got under way the ice in the
water tank was boiling and melted lead
from the seams of the cooler were burn
ing holes in the car floor"
1t is but fair to add that at this awful
crisis some philanthropi=t produced a
bottle of total abstinence .antidOte.-
brakes Travellers Magazine.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23
Construction of Flint Walls.

Flint walls are formed between two
planks or frames. the lime being poured
among the fiints in liquid state. In
some cases the largest flints are selected.
two courses laid with them-One inside,
the other outside of the wall-and the
center filled up with smaller flints and
liquid mortar; the lime should be mixed
with sharp sand and clean gravel. The
corners are formed of brick, and longi-
tudinal bands of brick are also intro
duced from two feet to two feet six
inches apart; these bands are formed Of
two courses of brick, one header and the
other stretchcr. Where bricks can not
he had, fiat bedded stones may be used
for these bands.-W F0scler, tn Archi-
tect,
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23

been LEFT sleeping in his cradle. was not
among the number saved. No time
must Be lost. The child must be found
ut once, since with each passing mo-
ment the waters were rising higher and
higher. and soon, very soon, indeed. It
would be too late! The next moment
the father. with blanched face and Wild
" beating heart, went rushing down
the street leading to the river, closely
pressed by half dozen men, each one
eager to bear part in the mission OF
life and love. But there was one who
had preceded all of these, one who. half
an hour before, through q presentment
which had come to himlGod alone
knew how and why-had set out upon
that sullen tide to seek and to save!
But see! He is returning! Has he
found the object of his quest, and is he
bearingi it to those who, terror-stricken.
win receive it with hearts too full of
gratitude to express itp Watch him as
he comes! How adroitly he steers his
craft among the drifting cakes of ice
and floating debris! Slowly, yet surely,
he is nearing the shore! What is that
little figure that nestles at his feete All!
it is-it ID the child-the clild-Ruben' g
child!
The boat comes nearer-nearer, and
now it grinds upon its keel, and strong
arms reach forth and draw it and its oc-
cupants ashore, and Ruben, with tears
streaming down his cheeks, while he
lifts his little one to his breast, looks his
thanks-it is all he can do-to his child 8
noble preservcr-Tommy Peterson. The
rest of that day, and, indeed, SO long
as he lived, Tommy and his achieve
ment were the talk of the village, for
the flood was apparently lost sight Of in
the minds of the people in the praises
that were bestowed upon the brave
youth. But at the cost of his life had
he succeeded in his endeavor. That
night he was taken violently i'll from
undue exertion and exposure during the
proceeding hours; and when the doctor
came to see him he gave little or no
hope of his living until the morning.
Toward night the sufferer grew rapidly
worse, and, suddenly clutching hold Of
his fathers arm, and, raising himself
up in bed, he exclaimed. in a moment
Of delirious enthusiasm: "Pa, tell the
boys that Booty scas good for some
thing, for he saved-he saved Ruben s
-child!' and, sinking back upon his
pillow, he closed his eyes and said no
more. The third day Tommy's funeral
took place at the little church in the viii
lage. The house was filled to over
flowing, and in his remarks the pastor.
with much feeling, alluded to the sad
misfortuncs attending the life of the
deceased, but said that all these were
overshadowed and forgotten in the one
grand and beautiful act which closed
his earthly career. The fathers sor-
row. though calm, was deep, but the
grief of Ruben and his wife was touch
ing-He had saved their child!-Gco.
NeUeu Lorejoy. IN Chicago Carrent.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23
Ideal Life in Vermont.

'.No city life for me-" said a Vermont
farmer. ''Gimme the country an abeOut
a hundred acres O. land an I'm salts
led"
Have to get up pretty early in the
morning. eh?'
..Sot very; three CLOCK in summer an
four in winter"
..Well. what do you do evenings:'
"D'ye mean arter it gifts tew dark ter
workf'
"Yes."
"B'gosh, 60 ter bed. ~ T. Sun
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23
A SHARP.EYED BOY.
How He Laid Up . Snug Sum Toward Go
ing to College.

How He Laid Up . Snug sum Toward Go
ing to College.
A poor lad living near Philadelphia
was invited a couple of years ago by u
wealthy friend in town to dine with
him. Among the dishes new to him on
the tablA. he notice that one he particu-
larly relished was sat down on the menu
as "Filet dc beuf aux campignons." A
sharp scrutiny showed him that the
.'ch ampignons" were only mushrooms.
such as he had gathered on the sheep
walks. These. however. as his friend
explained to him, were of fine quality,
and had been cultivated and canned in
France. They sold at retail, his friend
explained to him. readily at sixty cents
can. Strolling through the market
the next day. the boy saw one or two
quart baskets of native mush-
rooms marked Mt that price.
''Is there much demand for these
things?" he asked. 1--WE do not think
much Of them in the country"
They are considered q rare deli
cacy," said the man. ''but only cpicures
can afford to buy Them"
The lad passed on with new thought
in his brain. Why could he not grow
mushrooms? He was poor, to be sure,
and had little time to spare from his
regular work and had no land. Here
was a crop which he had been told
could be raised in . cellar, one for
which there was already q demand
which could easily be increased, and no
supply.
He went home. and during the next
few weeks read every book he could
find on mushrooms, laid out beds in q
back cellar, manufactured his spawn
with few old mushrooms and the ma
nure heap, and last fall filled the mar
ket with his boxes of tiny silver buttons,
blushing delicate pink. They were Of
precisely the same quality as the French
canned champignons, only they were
dewy, fresh, and sold at twenty cents.
Epicures eagerly filed their baskets.
and others who never had tasted them
in the prevailing high prices of all
kinds of food, tried the new cheap veg
etables and came again and again. The
crop fairly took the market, and the
boy has already laid up snug sum to-
ward going to college.-Boston Budgt.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23
WIT AND WISDOM.

"A Jewish paper says, RESOLUTIONS
can effect little; revolution is what is
needed"
The man of concise speech is q
treasure. He who knows when to DO
silent is grounded in wisdom. The
droner is intolerable.-N. r. Mail.
I'm Russia it is never asked whats
in a name?" 1t is taken for granted
it's the whole alphabet Binghamton
Republican.
The difference between a buzz-saw
and bulldog is that when the former
is most dangerous it never shows its
teeth.-Nesc Haven News.
"A Wisconsin COW has died fro m
chewing tobacco. Despite this warn
ing it is not likely that any other cow
will give up her ',cud. "-NOrristo,0n
Herald.
The wise young man who goes
counting will make himself solid with
the family dog. 1t is comparatively
easy to escape from the father.-Dsfroif
Free Press.
Victor Hugo was lately invited to q
medical banquet, which he was unable
to attend, but wrote to the doctors: II
send you a shake of my hand from the
bottom of my heart" The sentiment
was received with great laughter.
The reason the man who minds the
other mans business doesn't get rich is,
because the other man whose business
he minds generally isn't grateful
enough to be reciprocal and mind the
business of the man who minds his
business. See?-S0mD,eruille Journal.
"A small boy in Maine listened de-
murely to the story of SIMPSONS tying
the firebrands to the tails Of foxes, and
then sending them through the Phillis-
tines corn, and at the conclusion of the
narrative asked innocently: "Aunty,
did it pop"
-s'Would you believe" said thrift
less young man to friend, "that had
a fortune in my grasp last EVENING"?
"How sO?" asked the friend. Il shook
hands with . girl whose fingers wera
covered with diamonds. ~ y Iele-
gsuna.
Mrs. Maternal (conversing with .
irieDS ct whose house she is calling. Is
disturbed by seeing her little daughter
in another part of the room examining
some ornaments)-Hortense, dear, I
wouldn't touch those things. HOrtens0
%. they're not 50 very dusty. mamma.
Chicago Tribune.
"A lady who sat in an auction-room
with her husband q few days ago. no
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23

Washington Cake: Three quarters
of . pound Of sugar, halt pint milk,
three eggs, one pound -four, three
tablespoonfuls brandy Tor two teaspoon
fuis essence Of lemon). one teaspoonful
ground cinnamon. half . wineglaasful
rosewater, one saltspoonful salt. Drop
large spooonfuls ON buttered paper or
very smooth. fiat tins. II on paper,
first place it in . pan; do not let the
spoonfuls touch each othes Bake in .
hot oven. -Roston Globs,
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23
NEW YORK FASHIONS.

-Four Items About Stylish Garments Re-
Gently Introduced.
Long English ulsters are exhibited
made of finely-checked cheviot, fancy
bourrette, summer tweed, mohair OF
camel s-hair goods, which are designed
to wholly cover a stylish and expensive
travelling costume. protecting it from
dust and travel marks, and enabling the
wearer to appear at table in a fresh
looking and dressy costume. These
listers are cut to fit the form just easily,
and in the back are q number of two.
inch plaits which are stitched down
three inches below the waist line, where
they fall loosely, giving the necessary
fullness over the tournure. The fronts
are single-breasted, and button all the
way down. Handsome silk cord passe-
menteries trim the fronts of many Of
the most expensive kinds, and nearly all
have an adjustable hood added, silk.
lined and pressed to lie very fiat.
Some very chic and beautiful toilets
for watering-plaee wear are shown,
made of the new stripes in canvas and
velvet. with artistically fitted and draped
French polonaisc above made of finest
canvas goods as delicate as yelling,
these fabrics figured with dots in silk
embroidery matching the leading color
in the striped material. Some of these
novel patterns have the dots OF
other figures on a large scale. but they
are not as attractive to refined tastes as
the smaller designs. though often chosen
bv those who Ike them for fete and
house dresses.
A handsome gown worn recently at
wedding out of town was made of am
Der and crimson changeable silk, the
trimmings of dark laurel green velvet.
Panels Of the velvet showed between
the box pleatings on the skirt. The
ample waistcoat of velvet reached some
inches below the hips: and was trimmed
with very rich passementerie Of ruby
and amber beads, with small oval
buttons to match. The bodice above, Of
the shot silk. was simply piped ON the
edges with velvet, and the sleeves were
slashed Just below the elbow over q
puff of the velvet. Roses with dark green
foliage, formed the floral adornings.
The new and fanciful summer wraps
for dressy wear are very graceful. very
small and essentially Partisan. The
shapes are almost indescribable. Some
of the visites have velvet grenadine
backs and wide broche net sleeves. and
there are lace wraps with velvet front.
strapped across and held with gold
buckles set with Rhiae-stones. Shor'
rounding dolman shapes are loose in
the back, with trim jacket-fronts belted
from the sides only, or held at the wais
with ribbon ties. Three different fab
RIGS are often used upon these diminu
tive wraps, which arc in most cases o
the richest description.-M !. Euenins
Post.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23

"A young lady in Virginia commit.
ted suicide BY throwing herself in New
river. She went to the house, got out
her best clothes and took them to the
river with her. There she disrobed.
and put on the clothes she had brought
with her. leaving the others on the bank
Of the river. She then is supposed to
have waded out to large rock and
jumped into the water where it is very
deep.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23

"A ten-year-old boy Of Norwalk,
Conn, wrote to Mr.. Cleveland the Otner
day. saying that he belonged to chill
dren's literary club, and that for the
next meeting his task was to answer the
question: GLOW old is President Cleve.
land?" As none Of his friends knew.
he went to headquarters for informa-
ton. The following answer came back
ut once: Il was born on the 18th day
of March, 1887. / hope with this in
formation the question may be answer
ed.-GROVER CLEVELAND"
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23
THE GEORGIA STYLE.

Running Accommodation Trains for the
Accommodation OF Everybody.
A few days ago well-known citizen
of Atlanta had occasion to go from
Wrightsville to Dublin. He took one of
the accommodation trains between the
two towns and prepared himselfto sleep
through the short journey. When the
journey was about half over. and while
the train was dashing along at a high
rate of speed, the engineer observed q
fine large gopher near the track.
Jerusalem, the blestr' he CIRCULATED.
turning to the fireman, '.Put ON brakes
and stop the train!'
He caught hold Of the whistle lever
and produced q succession of shrill
blasts, which caused the brakemen back
in the cars to hurry to their posts and
frantieally endeaver to twist the brakes
up to the last notch. The passengers
thought the engineer had overtaken .
herd of wild steers, or that bridge had
been washed away, and every one of
them prepared to join in y prayer-meet-
ing by way of preparation for impend-
ing death. Finally. the train was
stopped, but not until the gopher had
been left half q mile behind. De-
tefmined not to lose his game. the en-
gineer backed to the spot where he had
seen the gopher. stopped the train. and.
accompanied by the fireman, gave
chase and captured it
SAY" said q passenger to the con-
ductOr, as the train once more started
toward Dublin, ''what kind of train is
this?"
..It's an accommodation train" the
conductor replied, land will accommo-
date an engineer as quickly as 1t will
passenger-especially when there's .
gopher in the case. "-AHGntG C0nstitN-
ton.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23

When hoe becomes dull it Yetards
work because OF the increased tax it
imposes on strength. Sharpen it by
fling to q chisel edge. When sharp it
works much more effectively, especially
when there are weeds to be cut
-PFuirie Farmer.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23

-Any person Who takes the paper rcg
niarlv from the post-ofRce. whether 0recseo
Is his name or whether he 10 Subscriber OF
not. is responsible for the pay.
The courts have decided that refuslnS 70
cake newspapers from the poet-omcs, OF !.
,rime fscie evidence OF INTENTIONAL FrAuh'
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23

"A cow at jamestown, n. r., met
with q sad fate one day recently. Her
horns grew out in front and the points
nearly met In attempting to scratch
her ear with her hind hoof she caught
it in the loop formed by the horns, and
in the struggle to release broke hex
neck.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23

"A Barnston (Quebec) citizen re-
Gently amputated his toe with q chisS'
and mallet because it panied him.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23

wind playing with his long, I'M
kempt yellow hair, ne presented
picture which savored indeed
more of the ludicrous than the serious.
Did he really understand the signifi-
canoe of all that was taking place, or
was he prompted to lend his presence to
the occasion because there was some
thing going on?
By ten G@ock that forenoon fifteen
families-with the exception of six
Misunderstanding in humble yet com
Portable homes in the valley, homes of
which they had become possessed
through the hard. slender earnings Of
years, these had been removed to the
village and cared for under hospitable
roofs. They had been saved from the
frenzy of the food. but the rest, consist
ing Of property, either had been or was
soon to be borne away wreck upon the
deep and mighty current Six men
who, at early daybreak. had attempted
to ford the stream to the village in
search Of help had lost their lives in the
effort, and their bodies were not re-
covered until the subsiding of the waters
on the seventh day.
among the number who had perish
ed was Nike Burns, one of the most
faithful and respected of those employ
ed at the foundry. l have stated that
with the above exception-fifteen fami-
hes had been rescued from the frenzy Of
the flood-no. not all rescued. either,
for at early noon that same day it wAs
soon discovered that Ruben's youngest
child, hardly more than an infant, was
missing! Up to that hour in the fear
ful excitement attending the rescue Of
the unfortunate people of the valley.
strange as it may appear. neither Ruben
nor his wife, nor, indeed. any one. had
noticed that this little boy. who had
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1886-12-17
THE BURC0MAsTER'S REMEDY.

A gourmand who was attracted to
the ''Beaver" by Nolte's advertise
ment on FRESH FROZEN OYSTERS in
the DAILY BULLETIN, ordered do
zen right away. He smackcd his
lips over the bivalves and was about
to order third dozen, when he was
seized with slight pain in the lower
regions. He flew to the counter for
relief. Sir Henry j. Nolte was there,
and ready to prescribe OF admins
ter an antidote. He turned to the
shelf behind, inserted his digits in n
newly imported box and drew forth
pride of Pacific" cigar. 1t was
ignited at the proper end, ndinhaled
by the suffering oyster fiend and
relief was Immediately effected.
With feeling of gratitude he (the
gourmand) asked Mein Herr for a
full box of his rcgalias so as not to
be without a specific remedy on n
future occasion.
Enough is as good as n
feast"
The fact is Mr.. Nolte has cigars
from . cts. up to 25 cts. each. For
Xmas presents there is nothing
more suitable for lady to present
to gentleman. Her ladyship will
then probably have an opportunity
of inhaling by means of her olfac-
tory organ, the delicious aroma of a
genuine favorita.
The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1886-12-17
HaMAKUA ITEMS.

The steamer Waialeale takes the
first load of sugar (some 1000 bags)
of this new seasons grinding, from
Honokaa, to-day.
The weather for the last week
has been very bad along the coast.
Several days the steamer could not
work.
AS usual, the Tax Books are be-
hind time. The Hamakua folks
were prepared to pay their taxes be-
fore the 10Th inst to save the 10 per-
cents additional, but no Tax ColIec-
tor could be found. The reason
assigned for not being on hand was
that the books were gone astray.
Some of the stores here, Mills
especially, are making quite fancy
display of Nmas goods.
Honokaa, Dec. 10th.