The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1886-08-07
HOW 1T is DONE.
story OF tho Purchase, Fitting and MAX
Ing of Feminine SUIT.

| story OF tho Purchase, Fitting and MAX.
Ing of Feminine SUIT.
I saw Graham's wife pricing dress
goods yesterday, and I know. what's
going to happen. Indeed, can give
you the programme without a variation.
She will be three days buying the goods,
and as soon as she gets the pattern
home shell sit down and weep because
she didn { take one of the others.
After she has braced up she will in
duce him 10 buy her four dollars worth
Of fashion magazines, and she will bor-
row every fashion plate in the neigh
borhood. On top of that she will ask
at least fifty women how she ought to
make it up.
The next step is to find drcss-makcr
one who is reasonable in her charges
who won't steal the cloth-who has
got taste--who is responsible If she
makes u mistake
About fifty women will oe consulted
as to the dress-maker; and Mrs. Gra-
ham will finally make selection. At
ter she has made it she will be sorry
that she didn't take one of the others.
+, Then come days of anxiety for the
Graham household. A fashion is Sc
lected after many headaches, and Mrs.
Graham is measured. In three days
she is to come and be fitted. The three
days are given her in which to worry
for fear she wont have enough cloth, or
the sleeves will be too short or too
long, or the skirt will be too full or too
Gcant.
Mrs. Graham has scarcely reached
home before messenger calls with
note. She hasn't got cloth enough by
five yards. She turns snow white. Gra-
ham, who happens to be home, turns
blood red.
matinee, during which Graham brains
every dressmaker in town with an axe
helve-in imagination.)
(More money-more CLOTH
Mrs. Graham goes down to be fitted,
and is put on the rack for an hour. This
seam is to be taken up and that one let
out, little more fullness here, not
quite so much there. About the same
as sitting for six styles of photographs
and having three teeth pulled.
"WellP" growls Graham.
"Oh! it's going to be just too lovely!
You ought to see what II perfect fit!'
The dress is to done Wednesday.
Graham drives his wife down, but one
of the apprentice girls has been ill.
Another trip on Thursday. Some of
the trimming had to be changed.
Third trip on Friday. Be done to-
morrow, for sure. The madame had to
redrape it, you know!
The parcel comes up Saturday night,
and Mrs. Graham wears smile once
more, and Graham has half mind to
compliment the dress. He sits down to
smoke and she rushes upstairs to try
it on.
Gnterval of fifteen minutes to pre-
pare red and blue powder and imitation
thundcr.)
(Smothered sounds of sobbng from
up-stairs.)
"Hello! Mary! come down and let's
see how you look"
"W-William, come up!"
"Well. now, what is itp'
"Oh! W-William. but told her to
be sure to give me comfortable waist,
and here can't button it to save my
lifc.h
(Silent Indignation on the part of Gra-
ham)
"And the s--sleeves are so tight that
/ can't raise my a-arms!'
Veins on Grahams neck begin to
stand out like broom-handles.)
"And the Skirt is shorter behind
than in front! Oh! W-William, I'm
so disappointed!'
(Three grunts, four shouts and forty
seven hard words from Graham, with
such an imitation of thunder storm
that neighbors run out of their houseS.)
The dress goes back Monday. Oh, yes,
it can be altered, but the madame sup
posed she was making dress for fash
ionable lady. No fashionable lady ex-
poets to raise her arms or draw COM
Portable breath.
Mrs. Graham goes down Tuesday
Mrs Graham goes down Wednesday.
day and get the dress
(Another interval of fifteen minutes
to get out the war-club and load the
shot-gun.)
"Well?"
''It is all right this time, only it
wrinkles in the back, Fuckers under the
arms. and there ought to be more
padding on this shoulder. The drapery
isn't very tasty, and one side of the skirt
is an inch longer than the other, but it's
right. my dear You won't have to
worry over it any more"
Interval of six weeks, and then Gra-
ham goes through the same mill again,
and the family doctor advises him to
leave the house he is living in for an
other in which there is no sewer gas to
act as slow poison on his wife).-M
Quad, in Detroit Free Press.