Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1884-1886, 1886-01-02
IEFELIclTY.

In these days of infelicity and high tenn
per in the bosoms of families, the benedicts
had better look q "leddle oud" or else their
domestic peace is knocked higher than a
kite. The year of SO opens up in this city
in rather an unpropitious fashion. The re-
porter is informed of two matrimonial bust
ups that from their oddly are worthy of note.
One man went to the maquerade ball New
Years eve without taking his wife, and she
in retaliation bundled up her bag and
baggage and left his bed and board. In
spite of his resistance and intercessions, she
remains firm in her purpose Of leaving him.
She don't in intend to have that kind Of q
man who goes out gallavanting in masque
costume and leaves his wife at home.
Then, again, mans wife went out to a
church watch meeting New Years eve, and
didn't come home until 1886. When she
came home she found the old man in q state
of savagery. and he wouldn't let her come
in the house at sill. In consequence of all
this there is sundered family and the
divorce lawyers are in fair way of having
another case in court of Doe VS.. Doe. The
popularity of this case is that they both be-
long to the church, and the old man always
holds family prayers at home, while
his wife has to attend watch
meetings to gather that spiritual con-
ISOLATION that she requires. When she says
he don't pray like brother so-and-so, and
don't carry around with him the right kind
of grace, be gets on his ear and raises Cain
in that household when the tug of war be-
gins. He halls from the Butternut state
and she says she don't take her religion from
no Hoosier, anyhow. Yesterday a whole
delegation Of neighbors, including brothers
and sisters of the church, attempted to
bridge the the gaping chasm, but it was no
go at the last advices received by the chron-
icler.
Then again another man has been pre-
vented from getting his medicine at drug
stores for the following particular reasons:
A friend of the family called on two leading
druggists and requested them not to sell Mr..
- any more medicines in pint bottles. He
said when he comes home with the medi-
cines his wife, who is very bewitching
woman, gets the LIQUID and drinks it all up.
Then they get to talking about first one
thing and then another, until they get to
talking about the cats. This raises a few
degrees in earnestness, and finally gets to a
discussion of the dog, and then q few more
degrees Of temperature is observable.
When the discussion takes in a few
more subjects the temperature explodes the
dynamite compositions of their nature and
sheol reigns supreme until the delegation of
neighbors part the combatants and restore
quiet. The neighbors said that there is
never no trouble when the old man has
taken too much medicine, unless the old
lady gets her work in on it, when it puts
blood in her eye.
These are true pictures of yesterday
drawn from actual occurrences Of the new
year. OF course it is not the intention of
the reporter to give all these affairs away
through the next eleven months and thirty
dsys, but to point moral on these.
Moral: Never go to masquerade ball
without taking your wife; when you start in
to furnish your wife with religion. give her
enough to satisfy her soaring mind; if your
wife loves medicine don't feed her out Of
your bottle at the time you take yours.