The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1886-07-25

out with a piece of caoutchouc.-Bos-
ton Commercial Bulletin.
A good old deacon in MoIunkus, Me-,
acknowledges that he killed bear on
| Sunday. But the bear was in his trap,
and il really was an act of kindness to
the bear. and he did not skin him till
Mondsy.-Er.
Walt Whitman will spend the sum-
mer in Canada and will probably write
a volume of erratic poems under the
title il Leaves Of Cashiers" as a COM
panion to his Leaves of Grass
Washington Critic.
He (tenderlyl-And what do you
think of the engagement ring l sent
you, Jennie?
She (delightedly) Oh tbs beautiful;
in fact, the handsOmest one 1 ever had
given me.-Boston Courier.
When a man builds a cottage at
watering place, and fails to rent il for
the summer at a few hundr-d dollars
more than the lot and structure cost
him, he thinks he has made bad IN
vestmeut-Norristown Herald.
"Ephlum, what makes so many cat
tails grow IN dis heah pOn'2 Well,
would say! Doan YOU know? Why.
heZ drowned in de pom, of course.
Pears like you wimmln folks doan
know muffin bout aglicultshah. Life.
At Easton, Pa, few days ago, a rail
road was sold by the Sheriff for $50. At
this rapid decline in the price of rail
roads, IL will not be long before even the
poor man can afford to have one in his
back yard, without dispensing with a
couple OF his dogs.-E1.
OF device which rings a bell and
puts up the name of the next station at
the end of a passenger car, the Detroit
Free Press SAYS: The constant ringing
and the lightning changes keep the
passengers interested, and adds greatly
70 the pleasure Of the journey.
a very enjoyable concert was given in
a small provincial town. Among the
performers was a popular tenor singer,
who was announced by the progra me
as prepared to sing an aria. Sound an
Alarm" by Handel. This he sang with
strong effect. and was Mortified the next
day TO perceive in the local paper the
statement that he had sung with great
taste and expression q fine song by
Handel entitled, Maria sound an
alarm Err.
The English Parliamentary whip
sorely perplexes the Gallo mind. A
Paris journal believes the whip to be a
and informs its readers
that lie Whip, the London Ministerial
organ" is urging all government sup
porters TO mus er for the home rule de-
bate. But this i not so bad as q prov
incial French paper, which after care
fully looking up the definition of the |
word whip" gravely renders the state |
ment that the Ministerial majority |
have received a vigorous whip" as the |
u Ministerial majority have received q |
vigorous spanking"
An Eastern drummer who was in /
Knoxville listened to the complaints of |
4 mountaineer about hard times for ten |
)r fifteen minutes, and then observed:
why man, you ought to get rich, /
shipping green corn 70 the northern /
eyes, | orter," was the reply.
you have the land, suppose, and
an get the seed"
Yes
Then why don't you go into the
peculation?"
No use. stranger" sadly replied the
native; 1.-The old woman is too darned
azy TO do the blowing ana planting. -
Nan Street NeirS.
In eourt-What pretext did your hns-
,and have for beating you?
1t wasn't a pretext, your honor, 1t
vas a club.-Bree Press.