Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1886-03-25
AT THE PoST-oFFlCE.
Some of the Trials and Tribulations OF
the Retail Stamp Clerk.


the Retail Stamp Clerk.
"The average ingenuity of the human
family" said a retail stamp clerk at
the post-office, must be very small.
Why, there is not one person in five
hundred who has gumption enough to
put stamp on letter. l see the pro-
cess gone through with about thou
sand times day, and ought to know.
All the people at my window begin by
putting the stamps into their mouths,
closing their mouths, rolling their eyes
like man trying to swallow pill
and moving the stamps around in their
mouths until they are perfectly sat
urated with saliva. Then they lay
them on the corner of their envelopes
and bring their clenched fists down on
them like pile-driver. Then comes
the profanity. See here, clerk, they
say, this stamp is no account. Won't
you please put little mucilage on it.
So strange that they can't put enough
mucilage on the stamps to make them
stick Now, the trouble is that these
people lick and chew all the gum of
the stamp before they try to affix it;
and if the gum were an inch thick, ii
would meet with the same fate. The
way to put stamp on is to moisten
the gum very slightly, and then
lay it on the envelope, and with the
end of the forefinger slip it back and
forwards once or twice until the saliva
and the gum are mixed. | have been
licking stamps for forty years, but ]
have never yet met with one which
would not adhere, if it was treated in
this way. Another thing people like
to kick about is the refusal of the clerks
to take torn notes and great piles OF
nickels and pennies in payment fol
stamps"
''Are they not bound to take themp'
"Not much. The Government has ,
treasury for the redemption of mutt
lated currency, and there is no more
sense in expecting the pOst-office to re
deem it than in expecting the paymas
ter of the navy in doing so. If it wa
once understood that we would tax,
torn bills, we should have no othel
money to handle and nothing else t.
do. We would embark in the banking
business, and somebody else would
have to be hired to attend to the post
office. Then, as to nickels. three-cen
pieces and pennies, the post-office reg
ulations expressly provide that we ar
not bound to take over twenty-tiv
cents worth from one person. Bu
they keep bringing them to use il
large quantities, sometimes rolled VI
in paper and sometimes slung in an oil,
handkerchief. 1t is all in vain, how
ever. Then, how they do kick agains
telling what is in their package ant
against directing them before they ar
weighed"
whats the use of that?'
"Why, all the use in the world.
we didn'teXercise any supervision owe
what was put into the mails, every bag
full of mail that left here would b
soiled with nasty ointment or hair OF
even if the post-otfice were not blow
up with some explosive. Now, we d
not require people to tell us exactl
what they have got in their parcel,
but only its general character, such a
dry goods, leather, wearing appar,
and so on, but they stick like blaze
even against that Then, as to &C
dressing their letters and parcels b'
fore they bring them to us to b
weighed, that also is indispensable, i
order to avoid giving misleading info
nation. We sometimes weigh som,
thing in an unsealed envelope, an
tell the postage, on the theory that
is unsealed. Then the man goes of
puts that amount of postage on it, an
seals it, thereby doubling the rate, I'll
consequence is that his letter is +,
turned to him for want of sufiiciel
postage. Then he goes TO the postmas
er and howls; and swcars that he pl
exactly the amount of postage on I'll
letter that we told him to put on
Again, we weigh parcel of merchal
disc that is not directed, and sell ii
man the stamps forit. We ask where ii
going, but the man is sullen and max,
some answer that we do not catch. W
take it for granted it is going to son
place in the United States. But |
goes off and directs it to Belgium,
gets stopped and returned to him
course, as no merchandise can be SCI
10y mail to any place outside of Il
United States. Then the man goes
the postmaster and howls, and sa,
that we expressly told him that Il
parcel could 60 to Belgium. See?
Have you seen the Annual Post
Guide for 1886, just out? 1t announc
some rather interesting changes in pos
al rates"
"What are they?"
Zone relates to photographs. Y,
would be surprised if You knew what
large percentage of the mail matt
, weighed by us is photographs. Her
l tofore a strange anomaly has exist,
l in the postage on them. We have be,
9 charging a cent an ounce for the
when sent to any place in this countr
and only Il cent for every two ounc
when sent abroad; that is to say,
: cost two cents to send two ounces
photographs, unsealed to the West 81
e of the city, and one cent to send t
same package to Turkey, India a
e Arabia. Now, however, photograp
!. are ruled by the department to
u printed matter, and they 90, when u
: sealed, all over the civilized worl
e nearly, at the rate of two ounces, or
4 fraction thereof. for two cents
o "What else has been changed?"
"Some changes have been made
the rulings concerning unavailable m
ter. The rule has been. for a 10
o time, that candy and cake could not
sent by mail unless inclosed in tin
;, wooden box. These articles are ve
troublesome in the mail. If candy C
U go, any kind of candy can 90, a
candies are sent that melt and run, a
defile and glue together all the otl
IS mail matter in the same pouch with
N,l.