The Washington critic., 1886-06-11
GENERAL AND cRIrICuLAR.


The Ku Klux Khan, the Bull Dozers, In
timidation at the Polls and various other
purely American institutions appear to have
migrated TO Ireland.
Patti had no bridesmaids, but not because
she couldn't get hem Th usnl's OF our
best society young ladies would have been
glad TO have served In hat ctpanity, and
knowing oil the facts, too. Society is
great moral engine.
When Mr.. Houk Of Tennessee
Gets loose upon the floor,
lie is adangcrous man to be
Between you and the door.
Quite lately he was not in fix,
But now he's ready to
Proceed to chew n colleague up
Aud spit him out d. q.
The citizens OF Belfast have been given
delightful variety entertainment in That
city, fully equal to summer opera in Amer
lea.
John Slugger Sullivan has concluded to
transfer HIS residence from Boston to New
York Boston was too tough for John.
We don't see how he stood It as long as he
did.
The relations between Canada and the
United States appear to have been strained
through n fsh net.
y New York girl was rendered speech
less by her lover refusing to marry her.
Quite the reverse is the case when--but
why 90 into narrowing detailsy Why
hang out an ancient chestnut as something
new"
To j. G. Blaine:
Say, Jim, lm darned sorry you worked
that Rum, Romauism and Rebellion racket
on me the other day What have ever
done TO you p Gladstone.
Speaking OF hot weather, Victor Hugo,
referring to the climate OF Sheol, says 1t is
"ulcers OF fire in leprUsy OF shade" Vic
tor takes the thermometer.
Anxious Inquirer: Now that the Hon.
William Cody has left town aud we cannot
be charged with mercenary motives (tick-
cts to the Wild West Show, we will reply
to your question by saying that Buffalo Nat
is no kin to Buffalo Bill, though some Of
Bills blood may be in the gnats veins.
"Daniel,n hoarsely whispered the Presi-
dent, coming hastily In and standing hold
ing the door-knob with q shaking hand and
look of fright in his eyes.
"Yes, SIRE" responded the startled sec
retary.'
"As passed the open door Of my room
while ago, saw bonnet on my dressing
case and woman at my window"
"Yes, SIRE" and the secretary's voice
was steady.
"But, Daniel" urged the agitated chief,
"what does it meang Who could 1t have
been ~
"Mrs. Cleveland, SIRE"
"Miss Cleveland is not in the house, Dan
iel. She has gone to New York.
81 said Mrs. Cleveland, SIRE"
"Mrs. Cleveland, Daniel ?" repeated the
President, interrogatively.
"Yes, sire"
"But my brothers wife is not here, Dan
iel."
''It was your own wife, SIRE"
"Zounds, Daniel" roared Mr.. c., 81 had
forgotten. Here, tie string around my
finger to jog my memory till get used to
it. Ha, ha, Daniel, think / owe you the
cigars on that, don't 2" and look of in
tense and happy relief came over the Presi-
dents face as he resumed his daily toll,
whistling softly to himself.
A Congressional summary is hot reading
these days.
"What have you got there?" said Sena-
tor to a tailor's collector who came into his
| Office with bill
"a bill," replied the collector.
"Let me see it."
"l'm very sorry" apologized the col
lector, "but this is bill OF a private nature,
| and is for your son.n
The son being absent, the bill was not
| presented for action.