The Abilene reflector. [volume] (Abilene, Kan.) 1883-1888, 1886-03-04
a TRAMP'S STORY.
He Tells of his Capture by Plucky Little
Hoosier School-Ma'am.

Hoosier SchoOl-Ma'am.
"Speakin' of the rural regions" said
an old chap at the end of a bar, who had
trouble in raising glass to his mouth
with his right arm, Il might be in
dooced to relate a leetle adventure
which happened to me in Iniiany last
summer"
He was earnestly advised to free his
conscience of its burdens, and he con-
! tinued:
"Wen, l had been hangin' around
indianapolis for several weeks, and
finally the Police Judge advised me to
leave town. never argy with Police
Judge. When they come right down
to fatherly advice | accept it and git. l
left the town inside of two hours, and
it didn't take me over three hours to
reach a mile post ten miles away.
About four o'clock in the afternoon, as
l was restin' beside the highway, 4
school-ma' am passed. She was chip
per leetle body, weighing about ninety
pounds, and white-faced, and when |
sort o riz up to ak her if she didn't
have bite to eat in her basket, she ut
tered womanish yelp and started off
on a dead run. l didn't hev my swal-
ler-tail coat and standin' collar on that
day. and l guess she took ME fur a
tramp.
'.Now, gents, when teller is ragged,
hungry and out O. rhino, what does he
do? He makes a break, in course. |
walks along fur about mile. and when
| comes TO a farmhouse with a look of
comfort about it, l stops in and asks if
4 poor man who has lost his hull family
in the great Chicago fire can git a bite to
eat, to brace him up Us he journeys to-
ward the settin' SUM-. The motherly
old soul of farmers wife would hev
set out y squar' meal fur me, but that
leetle school-ma am was there to pre-
vent. | heard 'em whiSperin' together
in the next room, and by and by the
old lady came back and give me the
bounce. A tramp as has belonged to
the purfesh fur fifteen years hadn't
orter fire up over sich trifle as that,
but it hit me like a blow below the
belt, and determined on revenge.
II went into the orchard and stole
some apples, and then laid around to
watch. | found out afore dark that the
farmer was an old man, and that there
was only three of 'em in the house..
Long huff fore the lights were out [
had arranged with myself to break in.
There was chance of plumber, and [
intended TO scare that leetle school
ma am out of years growth. Idon't
say as | would hev laid hands on her,
but that very thing might hev happened,
you know.
well, about half an hour afore mid
night | begins operations by creepin' up
to the back door. 1t was shut, but not
locked, and | crept in, struck light
and found my way to the pantry.
There was cold meat. pumpkin pie and
bread and butter, and it took me good
half hour to fill up. | might have gone
ont then. but | wanted something else
There was nobody sleepin' down stairs.
and after pocketin' a watch crept up
stairs into the old folks bedroom.
They was sleepin' as sound as you
please, and the moon shinin' in furn-
iShed all the light needed. | went
through Il bureau and got 4 wallet, and
was searchin' the old mans pants when
l heard a step at the door and voice
cried out: Surrender or I'll shoot
1t was that leetle school-ma' am.
She stood in the door in her night
dress, revolver pointed full ut me.
and could see hcreycS blaze. / made
Il rush to seize her, when "crack!
crack went the revolver, and one
bullet struck me in the right shoulder
and another in the side. | went down
as if shot through the head, and up
jumps the old man and piles on to me
like ton of brick. The little school
ma am went down stairs after rope
and then helped tie me hand and foot.
More'n that, she kept guard over me
while the old man rode off for an Off
Ger, and every time | fetched Il groan
she had that revolver ready to shoot.
In conclusion. gents, permit me to
remark that the court give me five
years fur that little affair, while the
plucky leetle schOol-ma am received g
public purse of $500. Sometimes Tvs
felt rs if it was my dooty to hunt her
up and marry her. ~. Y. Sun.