Helena weekly herald. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1867-1900, 1886-09-02
Matrimonial Philosophy.

Matrimonial Philosophy.
We have had some birthdays recently, for
Mrs. Arp and l are both June bugs. That
is to say, | am bug and she is a butterfly,
l reckon. / won't call her a bug, though
she does june around sometimes " hen things
60 wrong. She had birthday last week,
and would tell how old she is if was sure
she would never be . widow. She thinks !
would marry again at the drop OF hat. but
declares she wouldn't and saws something
about a burned child dreading the fire. But
she DOESN'T mean that, ] know, and the hon.
est reason is that she Is afraid she could
never find ano; her man like me. 1t would
take her a long time to train another fsllsY
and get him up to my standard of uxorial
docility. young man will train. but one
over 80 won't train worth cent, anG that ID
why it is so dangerous for girl of ambition
to marry an old man or a widower. The
training is on the other side then, and she
had just as well surrender to the Inevitable
We had the birthday, and gathered all the
children but one There were nine Of them
here, and some grandchildren and some
friends. and we had q good time. / salnted
Mrs. Arp on her cheek soon in the morning.
She always turns her cheek to me now, bul
didn't use to, by no means. We had music,
eat spring chickens and huckleberry pie, and
talked, and the boys said smart things and
told of exploits and escapes, and their
mother and sisters thought they were the
smartest boys in the world. II . boy
sneezes his mother thinks it smart Mrs.
Arp thinks her boys are an improvement
on the old man, but my ambition is for girls
to be as smart as their mother. There is NO
room for Improvement on that line. Not
long ago went of and was gone a month.
When l came back had q warm welcome.
and everything was calm and serene.
played king and autocrat for two or three
days, and Strutted around with the same
consequential airs i had worn over in Caro-
lima But they don't last long at my house,
and now am in my normal state Of sweet
humility. Bill Arp in Atlanta Constitution
Strengthening Fish with Dynamite.
By special invitation we were permitted
70 witness a novel experiment on Wednes-
day afternoon which was intended to tesA
the efficacy Of dynamite bombs In the cap.
ture of fish in deep water. The objective
point was found to be hole about twenty
i've feet deep in the upper end OF the blight,
where the hsh are known to congreats -
large numbers Arriving at the spot .
cartridge about six inches long, charged
with dy namite. to which had been attached
. heavy piece OF iron in order to make it 70
TO the bottom, was thrown in the water. A
suspense of few minutes ensued, and then
q faint report like the discharge of q small
pistol was heard, the water became agitated
and was raised about two feet, and imme-
diately thereafter. wVhin radius Of about
sixty feet, the fish were strewn in all direc-
tions A SC me of the widest excitement
followed. scoop nets were brought into
speedy use, and over 1000 fish Of different
varieties from the large gray snapper, over
three feet in length, to the small but succu-
lent saiIor choice, were secured.-Key
West Democrat