davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser., 1886-10-22


BENEDICTS IN A NEW YORK TOWN.
We lately sent ont postal cards to
the married men Of IL small town in
western New York with the inquiry,
why did you mnrry:" W. give few
OF the responses:
That what have been 'rying for
eleven years to fad out"
"MArried to g even with her moth
er, but never have
because | was too l.izy to work"
"Becanse Slrah told me that five
other young men h ID propose to her."
"The old man thought eight vars
courrir' was almost long enough
II WAS lonpso.l ne nj melancholy,
and wanted some o 'e t. make me live
ly. n. B. She makes me very lively"
81 was tired of buying ice cream and
candies and going to theatres and
church, and wanted rest. Have
saved money"
"Please don't stir me up"
'Because | thought she was one
among a thousand now | sometimes
think she is thousand among one"
because | did not have the exper-
ience | have now
"The governor was going to give ME
his foot, So | took his daughters
hand"
Il thought it woull be cheaper
than breach Of promise suit"
"That's the sam fool question that
my friends and neighbors ask me-
because had more money than I
knew what to do with. Now | have
more to do than | have money to do it
with"
81 wanted campanion of the oppo-
site sex. p. S.-She is still opposite" ;"
'Don't mention it,
"Had difficulty in opening the door
at night and wanted somebody to let
me in"
81 was embarrassed, and gave nv
wife the benefit of my name so that |
could take the benefit of her name
signed to check
Because it is just my luck"
Il didn't intend to go to do it,
81 yearned for company. We now
have it all the time
81 married to get the best wife in
the world
Because | asked her if she'd have
me. She said she would. | think
she got me-"
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser., 1886-10-22
Volume XLIH.---Nc 10.
w by They Married.

REASONS GIVEN BY A NUMBER OF
BENEDICTS IN A NEW YORK TOWN.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser., 1886-10-22
lJuFtrg.
pl ltbBEls

October comes across the hill
Like some light ghost, she is so still,
Though her sweet cheeks are rosy:
And through the floating thistle down
Her trailing. bfirrtaugled r0yn
Cleans like crimson posy.
The cricke's in the s,uhhle chime;
Lanterns fash out 1t liking Time
The dsisy's lost her rUtti.S;
TIE wasp> the honeyei plpplus Try;
A film il over the blue SKY.
4 spell the iver mutlirs
The goIden-roi fades in the sun;
The spider gauzy vel spun
Athwart the dropping sedges
The nuts drop soi'Iy from their burr
No tird song thr dim silence stirS,-
\ blight IL on tie hedges.
But filed with fir content is she,
A if no frost could ever he.
To dim Der brown eyes Ius,er;
And much she knows OF fairy iolF
That dance beneath the spreading K
With tinkling mrth and buster.
She listens wien the 1uSky ewes
Step softly on the fallen leaves,
As II for message cheering
And il must be that she can hear,
Bcyoud November grim and dre4r.
The feet OF Christmas nearing
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser., 1886-10-22

Il don't see the point, but | realize
its force" said a man when bee set
tied on the back of his neck.
"Go slow" is an expression that con-
tans much wholesome advice in re.
gard to frugality, but school boy
would never think of leveling such an
axiom at the school room clock.
"Did YOU ever 60 to the circus,
Tommy" asked Que small boy Of an.
other. "No," said Tommy; "my folks
won't let me. But they took me out
to hear Sam Jones preach.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser., 1886-10-22
The Tooth-Plck Gives Self Possession

'Do you see that wooden tooth
pick asked an Elmiran the other
dav.
Yes, it looks like a sec rnd hand
one what's the matter with it,
at is second hand. used it once
before. That tooth-plck stood ME in
a cool two hundred the other night.
How: Well, | drew pair of deuces
and bet $50 on IA bluff The next
man raised me, and | saw the raise
and went him $40 more. The first
thing | knew | had 5000 in the pot,
and did not help myself on the draw.
| pulled that too,h-pick out of my
pocket and bet another $500 as | co, l.
Iy picked my teeth. My opponent
looked at ME minute and threw
down a hand that had IA pair of king
in it. and | raked in the cash.
"Well, bow did the tooth-pick help
you?'
How: Great heavens, if | hadn't
had it to play with | would have had
nothing to do but sit and look my ad
versary in the face and my looks would
have betrayed tnat | was blufting at a
glance. Say, didn't you evor notice
the habit some men have of having
tooth picks handy when they go on
the witness stand? 1t gives them self
possession. \ man may call you q
liar and If at the same time he shifts
a tooth-pick nonchalantly from one
side Of his mouth to the other you can
rely on his meaning business aud back
ing up his assertion with right handed
argument il need be.
According TO the foregoing theory
tooth picks have been the cause of "a
good dea! of false swearing and wrong
doing. Why not prohibit their man
ufacture and sale, Messrs. Prohibi-
tlouists.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser., 1886-10-22
"Thp five hundred dollars. Paulus

"The five hundred dollars, Paulus-
they are yet to be paid. No-don't
interrupt NE. Icannot consent to in
dulge your generous impalses. |
must pay you, and there is no other
way for me than to seek a situation
as governess or instructess in some
seminary SO Pau'us, | have written
an advertisement, and if you will be
so kind as to take it down to the Of
flee of some one of the daily pap.rs-' -
Give it to mel he interrupted.
She placed it confidently in his
hand, he tore it deliberately in strips.
"Paulus," she cried in amazement.
Lilly, this is nonsense. If you
want to pay me you can
But, Paulus, you know | have no
thing in all the word!'
"You have yourself-to me the most
precious gift the aforesaid world con-
tains."
Il don't understand you
"Must | speak palmer? Well, then,
Lilly, give me yourself | love you.
darling, and would fain make you my
wife. Are you content to pay me in
this coin:"
"Oh, PauIus.." she faltered. 81
never dreamed of SO much happiness" "
And so Lilias Wayland's indebted
ness was settled most satisfactorily.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11

HEREDITARY tendencies wers never
better exemplified than in the case Of
Gen. Scott's daughter Virginia and
his two granddaughter, who preferred
the peace of conventuAl life to The
excitement Of tue world Of fashion.
The Generals eldest daughter, V.r.
ginis, the most beautiful OF that band
Of beautiful sist9rs, took the veil al
the convent ia Georgetown, D. @ q,
nearly forty years ago, and died there
a clustered nun, The second dsugh.
ter, Marcella, or, as she was commonly
called, Ella Scott, married Charles
Carroll McTayish, distinguished rep
resentative OF two. OF Msryland's his
toric families, and saw her eldest
daughter, very lovely girl, received
into ons Of thu Maryland converts a
few years since, and within few days
another daughter has forsaken the
world, and sailed for Europe to be-
come one OF the order Of 0armelite
nuns Of Brussels.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11
Representative Dowdney Dead.

WASHINGTON, December 10.-Repre-
sentative Abraham Dowdney, Of the
Twelfth District, New York, died at
his residence in Madison avenue, New
York City, at 8 o'clock this morning.
He was stricken with spoplexy while
entering his home las, night. The
Speaker this afternoon appointed tie
following COMMITTEES to attend the flu
neral: Mgssrs. Campbell, Viele, Mer-
rimsn and Muller, Of New York /;
0'Neil, Of Missouri; Scranton, Of
Pennsylvania, and Brady, of Virginia.
The death Of Representative Dowdney
swels TO twelve the death lis. OF the
Forty.ninth Congress il is as fol-
lows; Vice President Hendricks;
Senators Miller, Of California, and
Pike, of New Hampshire; r presen.
tatives FL 6ood, of Illinois; Rankin, of
Wisconsin; Hahn, OF Louisiana /;
Beach, Arnot aad Dowdney, Of New
York; Price, of Wisconsin Cole, Of
Maryland, and Duncan, OF Pennsyl-
Vania.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11

The visit of Gov. Fairchild to Mem
phis, brief though it was, was i'm
proved by him up to the LAST moment.
He visited many OF the leading indus
tties and was especially pleased with
our schools, the Market Street partic-
u!arly, where he found bright, alert
scholars responsive TO careful training
by conscientious and painstaking
teachers. The Governor, who is a
statesman Of much experience, said his
own State, remarkable for its public
schools, could not aurpass this, which
we hazard nothing in saying surpasses
any private school in the Slate.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11
THE REV. DR.. WOODROW
REMOVED FROM THE PERKINS
PROFESSORSHIP
In the Theological Seminary OF South
Carolina by Unanimous Vote
Ofthe Board OfDlrect0rs.
ESPECIAL TO THE APPEAL.l

COLUMBIA, s. O., December l0.--The
PROLONGED theological controversy ever
the Woodrow evolution question.
which has agitated TIE Southern Pres
byterian Church for the past two
years, and resulted in the practical
closing of tho theological seminary in
this city, was brought to its final stage
last night The church, through its
hiphes; councils, has maintained that
the theory OF evolution, held
by DIR. Woodrow, was contrary
to the teachings of Scripture, IS
interpreted in the standards OF the
Presb, teriaD Church. DR.. Woodrow,
on his part, has ssseverajed and main
tanned that his teachings were not I'M
scriptural or hereticsl, and has there
fore declined to resign his connection
with the seminary under such a
charge, and has insisted that tbs issue
raised by his accusers should bs met
and adjusted by the proper tribunals
of the church, whose judS-
ment alone could yindicate or con-
denim him. The four Syncds
which control the seminary have sue
csssively pronounced against DR..
Woodrow, and formally instructed the
Board of Direct RS to request his res
ignaiion OF the Perkins professorship
OF natural science in connection with
revelation, and in case OF his failure
to acquiesCe, then to declare that chair
in the seminary vacant. Pursuant to
these instructions the Board OF Direc-
tors met in this city yesterday
evening and adopted a resolu-
ton formally requesting the req
igpation of DIR. Woodrow, and
Informed him through a commit
tes of their action. DR., Wood: 2, in
waiting, promptly declined to accede
10 the request, whereupon the board
unanimously adopted resolution de-
claring the chair vacant. The board
then elected the Rev. DR.. ]. L. Girar-
deau, of this city, professor of did, ic
and polemic theology, and decided 10
postpone further elections of profess
ors until the frt Wednesday in Feb
ruary, when the board will meet in
Au0us.a
The chairs remaining to be filed are
as follow: Biblical literature and ex.
eTCises Of Scripture, pastoral theology
the Perkins professurship of natural
science in connection with revelation
The mem lers of the board express
themselves as hopeful Of the future of
the seminary, which they expect to
reopen next September.
In conversation with the APPEAL
representative, DR.. Woodrow said that
he accepted the action Of the board as
the voice Of the dominant body OF the
church in the matter, and however
much he may feel that he has been
misunderstood, misrepresented aud
misguided, he will make no resistance
TO the will Of the church, now for the
first time authoritatively expressed.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11

The removal of DR.. Woodrow from
the Perkins professorship in the The.
illogical Seminary of South CA olina
closes a controversy that has excited
widespread attention. Regretiing as
we do, that a scientist OF admittedly
great ability should have brought
upon himself the humiliation recorded
by our correspondent, we are con-
strained to admit that the church has
been consistent in its course, 1t could
not consent to even the diluted evolu-
ton Of DR.. Woodrow without endan-
gering the "scheme OF salvation" 1t
is impossible to reconcile the Darwin
ian theory of evolution with Christian
doctrine. Upon Adams fall the whole
theory Of the church rests. Through
Adams fall we sinned all" and that
fall made the atonement necessary,
80 the church teaches, resting upon
Scripture. According to the Darwin
ian theory there could not have bean
IAN Adam. The steps in evolution
were gradient and simultaneous
through generstionsand the boundary
lletween the earliest man aud The arb
r, ,al and preheusile creature who pre-
&C ded him must have been crossed al
tn same moment by perhaps hum
drt'ds OF thouss DDS, Dlsyhap millions
Tins excludes the possibility of DR..
Woodrow's theory OF Gods confe,riug
q soul upon, typical homo at the mo.
msnt when he had definitely taken
the erect position aud discarded the
tail. The Presbyterian Church is
right in condemning the Doctors
theory, which ia also repudiated by
science - --4. -.s4..sD
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11
Resolution Of Respect.

WASHINGTON, December 10.-After
the reading OF the journal Mr.. Camp
bell IN. Y. announced with sorrow
and regret the death ol his colleague,
Mr.. Dowdney, and offered resolutions
expressive Of the regret with which
the announcement Of the death had
been received by the House and pro-
viding for q joint committee Of the
Senate and House to attend the fu'
neral. The resolutions were unsni
mously adopted, and the House, as a
mark Of respect to ths memory Of the
deceased, at 1870 o'clock adjourned
until tomorrow.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11

soMB of the Repu5 lean papers in
sist that it would be an "unprecedent.
ed proceeding" to elect man Speaker
of the House whose seat is contested.
Very well, then the Democrats of the
next House will make a precedent,
and it will be very good one, by
electing Mr.. Carlisle as Speaker. Mr.,
Csrlisle's election cannot be defeated
because the apoliationigts have in.
duced Mr.. TDoebe to make a con-
test"
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11

THE Democrats OF the House, now
that Mr., Randall admits the necessity
for it. should be unit for tariff
reform. They should not permit
themselves to be diverted from their
purpose by the promises or offers Of
the tariff Republicans who are work.
lug in the interest OF the monopolista.
Let us by all means have revision OF
hhn nriH
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11

In HIS autobiography just isIued
Gen. George B. Mcclellan asserts that
the real object of the Republican
leaders during the civil var was mot
thepermanent restoration of the q Mon,
but the permanent sscsndency of the
party" even at the sacrifice of the
Union. He also asserts that Secre-
tary Stanton was Gin the reasonable
conspiracy" The truth sometimes
has long way to travel, but it will
find its way to the surface.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11
EUGENE DANIEL
VIM. ". ROGHS.

+. EVANS President OF the Lumber
Exchange Bank, Tonswsnda, N. Y,
writes: "Jsnus-y 10. 1886, l was
entirely Frustrated, and was reduced
from l76 to 1875 pounds. l thought
had inflammation of the large bow l..
The pain was relieved only by NOR
phiue forced under the skin. My
doctor treated me for Inflammation
and catsyrh of the bowels, an afFec-
ton sympathetic with disorder of the
left kidney. l had distressing pain,
with night sweats, and could keep
nothing on my stomach, especially
liquids, and was intensely thirsty.
February 19,h / was in int nse agony
with pain in my LETT kidney. l then
began Warmers safe cure. In twenty
minutes was relieved. l refused the
doctor's medicines thereafter. l fin
ally pissed large stone from the
bladder. then my pains ceased" II
you write Mr.. Evans, inclose stamp
for reply.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11

IT now sppears that the Rev. Cyrus
A. Bartol, the B ,ston preacher, who
so viciously and persistently assalled
President Cleveland for bringing an
action to test the validity of the Bell
telephone patent, is a stakeholder in
the Bsll Company. Hisox was gored.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11
FUNERAL NOTICE.

o'KEEFE-Ths friends and acquaintance
of NARY 0'KKRrE and family are invited to
attend her funeral, from her lats residence,
No Sl6 Madison street, this SATURDAY.
afternoon at 2 o'clock. Services at St, Pc
tsr's Church at $50 O'Clock
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11

We publish this morning a COM
munication from the Rev. Drs. Boggs
and Daniel, in answer to that of DR.,
Witherspoon, publishsdin yesterdays
APPEAL, which is, we hope, the last Of
a long and loo heated controversy.
The public cries, "hold. enough"
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11

THE Western Union and Baltimore
and Ohio Telegraph Companies have
at last reached common basis OF
agreement, and after TIE LIST OF Jsnu-
airy will advancs prices. This looks
very like another telegraph monopoly.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11
"Done Up" in the Finh Round

NAV York, December 10.-The re-
ported fight between Jack" Farrell
aud Tommy" Warren, is said to
have taken place in a sporting house
on Sixth avenue, Warren being done
up" in the fifth round 81 IS to be una
BILE to come to time. The whole thing
is causing great deal OF excitement
among the frien6s OF the fighters,
especially as Farrell was expected 10
fight Dsnforth or Wsrren-that is, the
winner OF the battle between the two
'Tommys
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11

DOES the proposed consolidation OF
the dressed beef companies mean
cheaper or dearer beef for the people 2
That IL the question which tn news
we publish this morning naturally
supgests
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11
Mrs RetnI,eimev meas,

q JAcKsoN, Miss December l0.-Mrs
]. W. Reinheimer, widow of the ate
]. w Roinheimer, an old citizen, died
suddenly today after few hours ILL
ness FROM congestive chill.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11
DIR, IL. L. LASKI,

Physician, surgeon ami AccOucher
RESIDENCE AAD OFFICE,
3ad Main Street, Near Union
Telephone No, 80,
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11

A WORD to athe wise. II you are
troubled with cough or cold procure
DR.. Bulls Cough Syrup at once. It's
use may save you from severe sick
naEa
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11
ESTABLISHED 1910.

THE deposition of DR.. McGlynn will
give fresh impetus to the George
movement aud will be taken to mean
that the church lie, after all, opposed
to the wage-earning classes.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11
GERMAN RANK or MynpHIs

Memphis, Tenn, ecemher 10, 1855.
THE the stockholders Of this bank arc
l. hereby not hed tn Il the annual election
for Fifse1 Directors 10 servo he ensuing
year will DO held at the bank on TUESDAY,
January II, 1887, between the hours of 10 u IN /.
and p 10. HDN. GOLDSMITH, Cashier
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11

A SOVEREIGN remedy for pain, Saliva
ton Oil-25 cents. Beware OF coun-
terteits,
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11
A GOOD DIED.

One OF the irst things done in the
Senate was the presentation by Mr.
Evarts Of the memorial of Major Gan.
eysl Schuyler Hamilton, asking that
his record might be changed 80 as to
retire him with the rank Of colonel
since 1858. This is tl8e man who was
suspected Of Confederate sympathies
because at Nashville, Tenn., he refused
in the winter tn turn number Of
women and children, members Of the
family OF John Morgan, the celebrated
Confederate rider, ont into the street,
with the remark ''he had not come
there to make war on defenseless
women and children" The Union
men in and near Nashville at the time
appointed committee, the chairman
of which was Mai. Lewis, aide-de-
camp of Gen. Andrew Jackson at New
Orleans, 10 w5it rpoa am and thank
him for his humanity. The chairman
told him that ne had done more for
thu Union csusa Ia Tences e. by thgt
act tran if be had won victory,
which vas probably true.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11
FIrzHUGH LEE FOR SENATOR.

The !rienda of Gen. FtzAugh Lee
are ale,dy working for aia el,c ion to
s. United Sts.es Senate 10 succeed
Ri 1lebergar. Prospective candidates
for the Legislature are already being
rsuvasssd, and the pat ouage the Gov
eraor controls is being di pens,d with
the one aim Of securing delegates IA
vorahle 10 his aspirations. Just now
it looks as though he would have a
walk over, but John l. B rbour is ) Ut
to bs heard from, although lew think
thet he will antagoDiza Gjv Lee. The
later mas surprised al who k7ow him
b. bis euddeniy developed ambition.
For nearly twenty years after Apo
mAlt0X ne lived quietly on his farm
snd took no interest whatever ia poll
ties. Unexpectedly, two Yeas ago,
he came forth as q candidaie for Gov
ernor, was elested aud now aspires tor
tie Senate 1t ia said that his aspira-
tons do not stop here, but hat he h 8
a fancy that he would make an excel
lent President or Vice President.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11

at the manner in which the President
and Secretary of War treated bis
Apache campaign. The former, in
his message, and the latter, in his an
nual report, both agree that the con.
ditions Of the surrender Of Geronimo
and his band we're such as to thwart
the intentions Of the administration
TO turn the ringleaders over to the
civil authorities for punishment.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-12-11
The M'MihNVlLLE BILL
DEFERRED ON ACCOUNT OF MR..
DOWDNEY'S DEATH.
The Tariff Reformers Hopeful
Magnanimous Gen. Scuyler
HamlltOn-FitEhugh Lee.
IsPEoIAL TO THE APPEAL.I

WASHINGTON, December l0.-On &C.
count Of the early adj urnment of the
Hou this NOR ing, IN respect TO t1e
memory Of Repr sentative Dowdny,
the McMinnville and Manchester bill
could not be acted upon. Mr.. Rich
ardson, however, succeeded in having
it made the standing order for next
Friday, when 1t will again be called
up. There is every probability Of it's
passing
Notwithstanding the strong cousti-
tutional report of Randolph Tucker
Yesterday against the bill making the
Commissioner of Agriculture a Ca =
met appointment, it is believed toby
that the bill will be passed by the
House, and may pass the S3nate.
There are
now of getting some sort OF reduction
OF the tariff this eSssion, which will
not altogether b. unac 'eptale. When
Mr.. Morrison calls up his bill, which
he has decided 10 do the latter part Ct
next week, they will make a hard
fight and take advantage OF every cir
cumsance in their favor. Mr.. r IN
dali, by the introduction OF hin bl.
last session, has commi ted hims elf %
an acknowledgement that q revision
OF the tariff is necessary. Mr.. His
cock and others Of the Republican
leaders wo1ld favor taking up the
question ard fighting the Morrison
p opposition with a substitute taking
the tax off tobacco and fruit brandies,
and placing sugar on the free list,
hoping thereby to make votes OF
the Virginia, South and North Caro-
lins delegations, but they would be
hopelessly divided by this plan, were
it to be attempted, and out Of the
chaos and division the tariff reIormers
expect to get some legislation. Repre-
sentative Anderson, OF Ohio, said to.
day that he would vote for a reduction
of the tariff $50, 100000.
THE COMMISSIONER OF INDIAN AFFAIRS,
Mr.. Atkins, received a delegation Of
gentlemen representing st. Joseph,
No.; Lasvenworth, X a., and Rock
leland, ILL.,, in favor OF the removal OF
the Indian warehouse from New York
City to thoss places.
GEN. MILES Is COMFORTABLY CHA
GRINRD
at the manner in which the President
opI Gaosaka.x, of Wa k.aoAal l.;