Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-10-31
BRIGHT BITS.

DEGARMo-And how do you stand on evolu
ton, Miss BrewsterI Do you believe man IS
descended from the monkevy
Miss Brewster-Oh. yes, 1 think man is; but
what puzzles me, Mr.. DeGarmO, Is where
woman came from -Erchdnge.
A HOUSE in neighboring town is occupied
oy two families. In the tenement which Is on
the east SIDE of the house Mr.. Charles West
wood lives. aud the tenement on the westerly
sue OF the building is occupied by Mr.. Charles
Eastwood, A. friend of the families, a Mr..
North visited them the other day and came
by the south entrance.-BOSt0n Post.
LOOK HERE, Pat" said gen tleman to his
servant, "when left the room m0mens ago
there were Sc lying on the table The money
Is gone, and you were the only person who
could have taken it."
Ohm inherent, yer honor; an beggin' yer
nonor's pardon, ye must have made mlsh-
take. 1t wuz only So ye lift on the table,
JtIdge.
Papa" quoth Francis, aged ten,
vi now nave seen the goddess,
fray, tell me if she Is. in truth,
OF liberty the MaudS
who Is the God want to know
Dung Francis loudly holers.
THE god," replied that worldly man,
"Of liberty Is dollars"
--Ne,0 York Journal.
A WITNESS in q lawsuit in Portland, Me-,
was considerably shocked the other day to
learn that there are places where profane
swearing IS discouraged. He was testifving IN
dot brick hadn't peen dare der whole - -
alley woud hat caved in" The Judge check ed
the laughter that followed, and fined the wit
ness $50 for contempt of court.-Nelo Yor K
Sun.
WANTED PROoF.-A man entered a Little
Rock bank and presented check which read
Pay to bearer the sum of $l0." The cashier
took the check, looked at 1t, and said: THE
check is perfectly good, but you'll have TO get
some one to identify YOU" "WhaC is the
Fenllpls I
saws, Paw to bearer'?' Yes; but Won must
prove that you are the bearer. ~ rkGnSaao
Tra0sley.
PROTECTING OUR INF Mt INDUSTRIES.-The
astonishing prosperity of the country under
a Democratic administration Is made con-
spicuously evident in the fact that five bridal
couples, without any prearrangement, are
about to depart from w Washington in the same
sleeping car. Under Republican rule many
young men and women could not go any
where after their marriage, and many others
could not marry at ali.
LITTLE MABEL has had birthday. and is 5
years Old. She has a little boy friend of G.,
whose mamma overheard the next morning
the following instruction:
''Now, Willie, you must put your arm
about me so,' drawing it around her waist,
land III put mine so, around your neck, and
! then We'll walk ong, and you must tell me
| that you love me. That's counting, and we
| must begin some time. - Detroit Free Press.
TUE occasional discomforts of modern con-
| Von1ences are illustrated by the experience
| of a JeTseyman who one day this week went
| to a district messenger call box and turned
! the handle. In a lew minutes the Orange
| Fire Department was in front Of the house.
| There was no IRE. and then some one QiscOv-
| cred that the police, not the firemen, we're
wanted. Four policemen fastened to the
scene, only To be informed that the guest who
pulled the box wanted q messenger boy to
send for morning paper.-Ne10 York Post
1 rrv,,,