The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1886-03-11
After Life Goes.

The papers have a story OF nttle
girl, who wandering around ceme-
terry with her mother, and reading the
eulogies to the dead carved on the va
rious tombstones, propounded the
startling conundrum
Mamma Where do they bury the
sinners?"
We have felt inclined to ask the
question ourself. We have wondered
why it was that all the good people
died, and all the bad ones lived on.
We go out into the world, and lis
ten to the structures of everybody on
everybody else, and we are inclined to
believe that the whole Of creation is
made up of thieves, and liars, and first
class Williams. We hear very little
about any ones virtues, but it is al
ways about their vices. The man
who is cashier OF bank, and has plod-
ded along until old age, without steal
ing something, is not extolled for his
honesty, but the young reprobate who
has lined his pockets with poor peo-
ple's savings, and taken them to Can
ada for safety, and to keep them cool,
is theme for every tongue. The
preacher OF the Gospel who has lived
a model life, and preached his convic-
tions without fear or favor, is seldom
spoken of outside OF the religious
newspapers, and his church has plen-
ty of vacant seats, and people go to
sleep under his teachings; but the
minister who casts Sleeps eyes" at
his neighbor's wife, fills all his pews
to overfowing, and if you see any
body asleep in his synagogue, let us
know. Everybody is keeping wide
awake, expecting he will "say some
thing about it."
Our friends are full Of faults until
dead. We are always complaining Of
them, They are stingy when they do
not send us any Christmas cards !;
they are mean when they decline to
indorse our notes, or lend us five dol
lars they are just hateful when they
call our Oldest boy pug-nosed, and
think Mr.. Browns Tom is great
deal more forward of his age.
We criticise every one until he dies,
and goes where criticism, no matter
how sharp and cutting it may be, will
not hurt him.
| However bad We may have c1Hsid-
cred him during his life, at his Heath
Jones is a good fellew. His virtues
are brought forth and paradcd a. his
funeral The clergyman who, while
Jones was alive, has fired many hot
shot at him from the invulnerable cit
adel of the pulpit, and has really look.
ed upon him as an incurable old sin
ner, quotes poetry at his funeral, and
alludes feelingly to "angel harps" and
golden crowns" as though Jones was
sure of his stars; and Mrs. Jones, who
has spent half her life bemoaning the
melancholy fact that she married sc
far beneath her, and "such shiftlssl
: man." tells all her neighbors and hel
friends that Jones was a kind husband
and father, and that there was never {
hard thought between them in al
their liyes. No, neverl And people
who have opened their windows tt
hear them quarrel, and call each 9th
er pet names, look at each other ant
: smile, and wonder if poor Mrs. Jone
8 really believes that she is deceivinj
anybody!
e Oh, this is a world of contradiction
: and many peculiarities. We do no
prize the things we have, but whel
d we lose them we grow wild over tn
: loss. We nag our friends while the
j live, and grudge them ten cents wort
e of fried potatoes, and when they di
we laud them to the skies, and tax
delight in expending all our spar
cash in marble to perpetuate thei
+ memories and advertise their virtue
J. ~ Y. Herald.