Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-11-28
BRIGHT BITS.


SAID the wife of an emigrant; who had
moved from Georgia to TeNas: III Iexas Is
so much b. tier than Georeia. why Is IL that
peopIe 10 Georgia can make enough money 70
move 70 Ttxa>. bat can never MAKE enough
money TO move back. "-ESchdnye.
SIS that a Landseer. Mr.. Cresus?'' asked
me visitor. pauslng before the painting.
mo, replied the post. reckon IT'S Dnr-
nam see how broad IL is between the norns,
anu ,ee the color and the curl on its iorenesd
Ihat's grnutn durham. sure. 1hat amt
no Landseer. "-EccAan0e.
BoB-Have you sold your humorous article
To any newspaper yet:
Ssm--l've shown II to several editors, but
d ne OF them have bought it,
enough.
sam--oh. yes. they do; for they all laughed.
-EScs1Nge.
TIRED AUDIToR-See here. MIR. Manager
TO You SNOW that act curtain has been down
over hall IN hour?
Manager-Yes, yes know, but what can !
DO. The erformsuce can't go on without
the star actress, YOU know. Well, what's the
matter with her?
she's busy giving her pug dog bath
OIhdhd Void.
"DoN'T You like jelly cake with frosting on
top. Mr.. Feaih y" inquired Bobby,
80, yes" laugh Mr.. Featherly- ,'but /
honght that had eaten about all the desert
u INT. Howev r. since Bobby IS 30 porte
Houut 1t. Mrs. Hendricks" continued inc
Young man, Il believe YOU may give ME a
small hcce of the jelly cake"
"A ] right" said Bobby, land I'll nave
some too. NJ SAID could have piece if she
had 10 cut into it."-EScb"a0e.
RICH but penurious hostess to poor society
IrIenu-l notice that qudre dinner plates are
the thing nov. aud I've ordered ten dozen !;
but III worried about one point in serving
dinner with them.
Friend-what are YOU in doubt about?
"ongnt l 20 serve round STEAK on these
square piates?';
THAT depends. There may not be enough
to go round. judging FROM the dinner you
gave the other day ."-B stOn Rec0rd.
LITTLE DoT--What does your papa drive
around IN II CARR ge so much for?
Little Dick-'Cau-e he's doctor.
"Ain't you kind o shamed of it2"
ashamed. Why?"
"'Cau-e he never makes speeches nor gets
| his name In the papers, nor nothing"
Il didn't think of that"
mo, IT'S TOO bad. III ask my papa to let
him into the knights of Labor, so he'll be
| someDOdy. - Onahd World.
"AURELIA. have you heard about those
| Southern girls who formed a club to boycott
| the young men who came 10 visit them and
never t ok them 10 the theatres?
Aurelia- Y s know all about 1t. We girls
| nave he same kInt of a club.
"HOw does IL work? ~
doesn't work at all, and we feel so badly
| over It,"
The young men persist in callng?"
NO. They stay away-the wretches"'-
| PhiLIdeIpAjI C,fH.
| OMAHA GIRL-Oh! have such news for
| you.
Omaha Youtn-Has your father consentedi
YES. and what do you think he based his
| faith in your cha acter On?"
| "Im sure don't know.'
| "Why. he sald he always noticed that m ar
no is thorough in one thing is thorough in
| verythiOg, and he had found you always
| BACKED your boot heels just as carefully a.
The fronts. Isn't lucky?"
| YES, indeed, T. raise that bootblack's
| wages Tomorrow"
MIND NG.-Customer-How mucl
| viii YOU charge to give me reading OF m!
| head?
Phrenologist-Well, sir. you can have
oHrhTl examination for Soc, written on
| for 81.
Cu-tomer-Go ahead; just a verbal one.
Phren log st-WeN. In the first pl4ce, you
have The organ of combativeness very Target!
| leve Oped. FL
| Customer--How! What's that you say?
| PhrenologIst-Yau have the bump of com
| bativenrss very large.
| Customer -Darned lie! II you say it agail
I'll knock you down Boston Beacon.