, 1886-06-18
TRIP THROUGH THE srAres.n
Some Extracts from the Notes of n Dis
%yruntIed Enrlishman in America

grunt1ed Englishman in America.
Every year some Englishman of the
other sort does the world in n little
volume or an article; and America with
h rest. One of them has Just been
Through the States" in Fortnightly.
He is a fussy little wretch, who has come
over with his bundles and wraps, sir!
and his overcoats and notions, you know!
and he expects all the world to make
room for him, and see that he has first
class comforts, and no Interruptions
upon his British c~onstitutionals, or there
will be a row, of course. Naturally he
begins with his stomach. Il failed to
discover any resemblance of comfort in
any of the ordinary American hotels.
The bedrooms are furnished in a paltry
manner: the toilet utensils are of the
commonest description chair brushes,
tooth brushes, etc., the gas bracket is
invariably placed in~conveniently with
regard to the looking-glass; and the SER
vice is Indifferent. In private you never
see a retinue of servant and walters,
such as we nave in England. In vain
the innocent traveller places his boots out
side his bedroom door; 10 notice will be
taken of them. -Four meals a day are
prepared; and the cloth is practically laid
all day. You walk into a dining-room,
which is generally of immense size, and
the you cross the threshold a
gigantic colored man snaps his fingers at
you, waves his arms c~ommandingly, and
assigns you a place at one of the tables.
He is ornamental, fussy and of very lit
tie use."
.,
This only begins the trouble. "The
moment you nave taken your seat an
other negro rushes up and pours you a
glass of iced water, which forms the uni
versal drink of Americans at meals. At
dinner, after the iced water, another ne
gro bends down over the traveller in aw-
full silence. The whole dinner must be
ordered at once, and it is all served at
once" Here he gives us a specimen of
one Of his orders. Some oysters on the
half-shell, green turtle soup, some clam
chowder. some halibut steak; green
goose and apple sauce; lambs fries:
sweet potatoes; egg plant; %succotash;
stewed tomatoes; Roquefort cheese;
lemon pudding; cranberry pie; cakes;
watermelon, and French bread" Then
he complains that the negro does not re-
member his orders in full. IF you wish
to do at Rome as do the Romans you dip
into this dish and into that dish, tasting
of several simultaneously. The waste
fulness Of the American system is ter
rible to think of And what a disgust
ing sight it is to see a table full of peo-
pie, Zach one behind his semi-circle bar
ricade of dishes, all of them getting
cold, and all of them more or less in a
mess.
And the crockeryi and the knives!
Dishes and cups and saucers of the coars-
est white pottery, very thick and heavy;
and knives that have no cutting edge,
but are silver-plated. The very best
coffee in the world will taste poor when
drunk out of a cup a quarter of an inch
thick; and reed-birds on toast, one of the
American ~specialties, would taste sweeter
if served on porcelain. Immediate and
thorough reform is needed in American
crockery.
His picture of Chicago is one of those
soft, subdued lanscapes that we should
expect him to write after devouring one
of his bills of fare, ice-water and all, I'M
der the terrible eye of that big negro
o u times in one day. Even the dirti-
ness of Chicago is on a grand scale; but
in spite of the muddy, black streets, lit
tered with refuse, the plank-foot-paths,
the yellow lake and the canals, the whirl
and rush, the bowling newspaper boys,
and the very mixed swarm of its inhab-
itants, Chicago is a most interesting place
for Europeans to visit. OF cousre, at
Chicago, as elsewhere in America, the
cultivated minority is lost in the warm
ing multitude of coarse and vulgar peo-
pie; and at night you find the streets full
of long-limbed fellows, who wear their
hats tilted back on the crown of their
heads, too uncivilized to do nothing, and
who pass their evenings chewing guilds
and toothpicks, with an underhand look
on their countenances, indicative of a
readiness for a fight at any moment"
He sees one thing in New York that is
some trifing alienation. "The elevated
railroad is ugly enough in itself; but the
stations, perched in the air, and ap-
preached by covered stairways, are really
pretty features in the street scenery Of
the city-amusing in silhouette, and
pleasant in contour and ornament"
This is not only delightful, it is soothing.
1t is a s%unflower; our national pride at
once looks up-up to the elevated rail
way stations. 1t is sweet to be flattered.
Here is more of it: II discovered only
one church in New York which has arch
itectural merit throughout; one church
which, SO to speak, holds together and
bears analysisr-that is, holds together
and bears picking to pieces. Il discov-
cred also but one house in Fifth avenue