The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1886-07-22

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story-writers in Harper's for August,
with this suggestive title,-''The PEN
allies Of Authorship
THE Life and Works of Josh Bill
ling" Mr.. z. J. Bishops biography of
and selection from the departed humor-
list will appear the LIST of September. 1t
will be an octave volume of about 500
pages, with English cloth binding, will
contain four steel and wood cuts, and
will be introduced by Hon. Charles F.
llamlin, speaker of the Maine House
of Representatives.
THE King of Siam has ehristened his
newborn son George Washington. A
revision of the old answer to the ques-
ton, ''who is George Washington"
will run: The first in war, first in
peace, and first in the hearts of the
Siamcse." The revised version will be
found superior to the old owing to the
rhyme it makes.
PROFESS r PR1TCHETT of St. Louis
says that the days are getting longer
at the rate of two seconds in a century,
owing to the tides, which act as friction
brakes upon the earth's axis, and thus
decrease its velocity. According to
this theory. in 5000 years eight hours
labor will be equal to ten hours now.
Rev. DK. BARroL. speaking of his
lifelong friend, Edwin p. Whipplc,
who recently died at his home in Bos-
ton said: Il never heard a word of en-
w from his lips, and never saw a
CLEAN of malice in his eye.' What
higher ambition can any man cherish
than to be worthy of such eulogy after
death?
THE Philadelphia Record defines q
capitolist as man who having paid
for his breakfast has enough exchange
able property remaining in his posses
sion to pay for his dinner. Yet there
are theorists who insist that there will
be no happiness until all mankind are
dead-broke after breakfast, and no one
has anything, and everybody has
everything.
LITTLE PHIL had always mentioned
each member of the family in his eve
ming prayer, but the other night he
left out the baby. "Why, Phil, you
forgot your dear littlo brother!' His
black eyes flashed with the answer:
There's no room in my prayers for
my little brother; there's no room in
this house for him, and what's more,
there never has been!'
A CERTAIN editor of weekly news
paper made practice of ''stopping the
press to announce if he had nothing
more important to announce than dog
fight. One week everything was as dull
as apatent Office report, but the ruling
passion cropped out as follows: 1--WE
stop the press to announce that nothing
has occurred since we went to press Of
sufficient interest to induce us to stop
the press to announce it.
AMONG the papers left by the late
King Ludwig is one containing the
plans of the castles he had intended to
build in the future. His Majesty had
planned chateau designed to surpass
even that of Hcrrenchiemses, on the
apex of Falkenstein, the ascent to
which would be we'll nigh impossible,
The grand hall of this projected cha
teau was to be paved in mosaic, and
the centre of the hall was to be adorn-
cd by an enormous peacock composed
of precious stones.
1T is said that German scientists
have discovered way by which the
water-gas of certain springs in Maine
may be turned to solid ice on the hot
test day in summer. The possibilities
contained ia natural gas seem to be
inexhaustible. 1t has made Pittsburg
clean city; it has furnished fuel and
light and heat, and now water-sas
comes forward as an ice-producer
What we want now is gas-well which
will furnish perfectly safe ice-cream.
ATTORNEY GENERAL GARLAND has
applied to the President for a two
months leave of absence. He pleads
ill health as his excuse for going away.
Undoubtedly the worries OF the past
winter have affected him, and the touch
of sickness he had some months ago
weakened him considerably. He will
leave for his old home in Arkansas
about Aug. l. 1t is believed that he will
never come back to the Department of
Justice.
THERE is rumor that Gen. B.F.
Butler will be the candidate of the
Democrats of the Lowell (sth) Massa-
chusetts congressional district. A
Lowell man says of Gen. Butler that
he has 'aged rapidly within three or
four years and carries his SO or 50
years of life without any attempt to
hide their effects. His hearing and
sight are going fast, his step is hating
and uncertain, and he finds the sturdy
arm of his negro valet necessary in
getting in and out of his carriage
TIE Literary World is responsible
for the following: Mrs. Caroline Dana
Howe. author of the famous song
LEAF by Leaf the Roses FALL has met
with unexpected success in the sale of
''Ashes for Flame," her book of verses.
The cost of publication was met within