The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1886-08-18
BRiC-.i-B i-BR.AC.
A foot race-Chicaeo girls.

a loot race-ChlcaSO girls.
You can get your phiz at the photo
grapher's or the soda counter
The Mexican flea is becoming vicious
and shows 4 decided inclination to bite.
The sins an old man confesscs with the
greatest relish arc those he never committed.
The candidates are abroad in the land
| The woods III every county are full OF them.
Very possibly the child is born who will
he the first President of the British rcpub-
| lie.
Many man is the architect of his owi.
fortune, but never gets money enough 10
| build
A poodle dog and 4 Doodle husband are
all that many young ladies require TO make
them happy.
The only time o young girl will excuse
her lover for treating her coolly is when he
sets up the ice cream.
1t is curious fact that the sun never
shines so hot on the base ball grounds as il
does on the harvest field.
If fifty men in the United States engage
in 4 violent outbreak it is called 4 local dis
turbance; in Mexico it is Il revolution.
The advocates of female suffrage arc so
consistent that at g recent banquet they Ind
their bill Of fare headed ''womcnu.
Some darned Yankee has invented 4 new
patent stocking darner 1t can never take
the place of a nice little woman, liowcvc:
Some portions of South Carolina are now
so rigidly temperate that they object 70
storms brewing in the neighborhood.
The knights of Labor and Labor Unions
are distinct bodies, buttherc is a striking
resemblance between them.
The boss painters have met in Philadcl-
phia, but we presume there will he 10
change in style for coats of paint at present.
1t is curious that wrecked steamship is
always i'll command of "onc OF the most
| experienced captains in the service.
The difference between buzz saw and
& bull dog is that when the former is most
dangerous it never shows its teeth.
We are never more deceived than when
We mistake gravity for greatness, solcmn:ty
for science and pomposity for crudition.
A California woman while splitting wood
bit her tongue in two. There is no moral
to this Women don't split wood this side
of California.
N1elocipedc is the new name Of 4 muSica.
bicycle so fashioned that the rider can kick
| out melodies waltZcS and reels as he travels
along the road.
A pistol-carrying, threatening crank has
become an adjunct Of Gen. Lo%an's Prcsi-
dental booming scheme. Anything for
no.oriety, you know.
The new 81 silver certificates will bear 4
copy Of the Stuart portrait OF Martha
Washington. 4 portrait Of Gen. Hancock
will adorn the 81 certificates.
Fortune is like collar button; when it
flies from you you have to get on your
hands and knees and work hard to get it
back
Harmonious coloring gives feeling of
rcposc in the home, says an art Journal.
Therefore if YOU have red headed wife,
furnish your house in the same tint.
Women can talk great deal with their
eyes, but the trouble is in pinning them
down TO anything they say in this rather
vague and romantic form Of expression.
French women consider carrots as a
specific for the complexion, and coed
Judges in such matters Can tell ut 4 glance
how many carrots fine 4 woman's complex
ion is.
All He was arrested in Portland on sus-
picion. Now if somebody would arrest
'Ah there and keep it out Of sight AM
hearing for while it would be rest ssor
everybody.
An advertisement ina Western exchange
reads: How to act successfully on tie
liver" If the chap who put the ad. il
would only produce Il medicine That would
teach people how to act successfully or
the stage there would be some sense about
him.