Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-09-06


Indeed, can we'll remember even now
the rage and grief which possessed my
youthful mind when | discovered that
was called "rhe Toad" by my school
companions, and how that orr old coach
man, who was my ally and contidant in
those days, could find no better words of
consolation than, "Never you mind,
Master Jack; you let ZEN talk, pack o.
young impertinence. What say is and
some is as handsome does"
Time has but accumulated my many
personal defects, of which ! am
painfully conscious, and the result is
that am shy, gauche and nervous in
society.
One fell and dreadful day mark it, o
Time, with the blacklist letter in thy
calendar I was invited by nv cousins to
ESQUIRE them to a dancing party at South
Kensington. | made feeble excuses; they
were overruled. | appealed to my re-
spected mother; alas she thinks only
need bringing out to become an enter
tanning ornament to society.
Well, / gave In. What would you have
me to do? Ugly as l am, l can't help see
ing that Kate is a most pleasing person. l
md in difficult to say "No" TO any one,
and an impossibility in the case of this
lovely cousin OF NINE.
Kate and Millicent are what are called
''fne girls" and i am not sure that did
not catch the ghost of grin upon the
long list of turnkey faces In the
hall as l stumbled along in my tight
boots, with Kate on my right arm and
Millicent on my left, and both OF them
talking to one another over my head,
alasl
The ball room was a long oblong, and
opposite TO the end where the musicians
were stationed there was kind of alcove
or bay window, In which was placed one
of those large circular ottomans which
have a cushioned seat all around, and in
top of the lounge a receptacle which is
filed with foliage, plants and dropping
ferns. Now, could anything be more
enticing to a man OF my retiring DISPOSE
ton? II could only get behind that
happy ottoman, behold me blissfuIlv con-
cealed until the general move to supper
should drag me from my resting place.
Fortune favored me for once. But just as
l was beginning to realize the pleasant
ness of my seclusi0n and the relief from
the shynees which assails me In public
felta most depressing sleepiness creeping
over me.
Unjust have slept soundly for some
time, but at last, suddenly, and with
startled and chilly feeling, | awoke. Con-
fused at first l could not imagine where
was or how my ordinary sleeping attire
had become changed into the claw ham
mer coat and other male habiliments of
evening society. However, as | crept
around the ottoman, and peering out from
my corner saw wide stretch Of white
floor cloth, dimly lighted, before me, and
marked the music stands at the other end
of the room, the dreadful truth burst in
upon me. They had all gone down TO
supper! Now, in my perturbation at the
prospect OF going TO the abOminable dane
ing party / had been unable to attack my
dinner with my usually robust appetite.
l was, therefore, ravenously hungry.
Moved by a desire to eat and drink at
whatever cost to my constitutional mod
esty, and agOniZed at the fear lest the sup
per should be over and the debris thereof
cleared away before l could obtain what
l began to want with an increasing crav-
ing, it struck me that it would be
quite possible for me to glide into the
supper room among the servants, who
would be constantly going in and coming
out
| slipped quietly down the stairs ann
soon found myself close to them. Now
was my opportunity and / was just going
to seize 1t, when a fiend in human shape,
a waiter in evening dress, pushed huge
dish of strawberries into my hands, saw
ing in that unpronounceable cOckney
twang:
''Now, then, Sawney" (my mother calls
my hair ''auburn"), ''loOk alive! Take
these yere strawberries round; and mind
you don't spill 'em."
Not minutes time was given me for
expostulatlOn or explanations; other
walters were pushing on behind; and be-
fore could gather my scattered wits |
found myselfin the brilliantly lighted wi
supper room among the hired walters and
an enormous dish of fruit in my hands.
What was to do? L had not moment
to decide; the horror of being seen in such
a too ridiculous position terrified me. aud
l found myself handing round the fruit,
with waiter following me with cream
and sugar. Imagine the awful state Of
my mind when l approached my cousins.
They were close together, separated only
by the partner of one OF them. | could
see as drew near that they were talking
vivacIously; it was their turn next. The
gentleman beside Kate said "No. thanks"
Bless himl Kate refused them without
looking up. Millicent allowed her friend
to place some strawberries on her plate,
talking eagerly all the time, and with
sigh of relief l passed on my strange
round unrecognized, No questions were
asked me, and not knowing what to do
followed them, or rather went with them,
to the kitchen part of the mansion, Ieav-
ing one or two in the supper room 10
attend on the gentlemen who remained
there.
SNOW it's our turn to get blow out"
said a long and cadaverous waiter to me,
as we went down the stars side by side.
II dunno low you feels, but tue sight of
them swells a Dustin 'emselves, aud the
smell of the vittles 'as made me that
'ungry as / could eat the lind leg of dog
raw"
l quite agreed with my gentleman and,
painful as my position was, felt some
what cheered at the prospect OF food which
his words opened out 10 me.
"Well." at length said my long friend,
leaning back in his chair, heaving a sigh
of repletion, and casually picking his
teeth with a fork, "hall | can say Is
done myself VERY well, and l cope az
you ave, too, young man. 1 only wish l
'ad 60 in like this heyery day, but life
amt all beer and skittles, as the sayin' is.
Been long at tbis trade? | amt sure If
I've ever seed your face efore."
"No," said i, 'this Is the first job / ever
had OF the kind"
"Well," said he, Eyer might do wuss,
though the hours Is trying TO the 'elth."
II s'pose you know what you've got ter
do, matey?" said my companoion.
"No," said 1, II can't say | do"
"Well, look yere," said he; 81 stands
ERE at the bar and takes the tickets from
the gents and calls ont the numbers to
you. You finds the numbers on the leaps
and lands the toppers an ceterer to zoe