davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22
LIME KILN CLUB.
Brosher Gardeners Memory but Not His
knowledge Fails Him.

Detroit Free Press.}
When the meeting opened in due form
Brother Gardner announced that the Hon
Profile Livermore, of Arkansas, was in the
anteroom and waiting to address the meet
ing. Tho subject of his address was: Has
the White Man Passed His Zenitnp II there
were no objections he would be brought In.
Profes or Wntergreen Davis didn't pro
pose to object but he would Ike TO be in
formed of the meaning of the word zenith
de had attended twenty-one different ward
caucuses and had clerked In a wood yard for
three weeks, LUZ he had never met with the
worl before.
There was deep silence as b.. settled
down, and Brother Gardner scra .ched hi,
bald pate unit! as if the friction vouli start
a fire.
Zenith" he finally said, why, ] ar mo-
dan serprised at your ignerenca EDery
Guild pusson in dis kentry orter - know ali
about zenith.n
yes, sab, but de word breaks me up"
Zenith am tlrefFul easy word" con.
tinued the president as he looked up and
down the nall in a nervous manner You
didn't git zenith an ziLher ali NIKE. up did
you"
NO sah'
NV hen anybody says dat Samuel skin. for
Instance, has passed his zenith dey cant be
Token UP fur ander. 1t meaus- t .,,eaus
~
He waited SO long that the Rev Peusio
arose and said
"Mlsser President, it means ia; he has
passed. his best pint. Zenith ana do highest
pitch"
'Brudder Penstook, sot rir,4 ,owa dis
mintl' exc aimed the PRESIDENT n he used
his gavel in vigorous manner w no axad
you TO riz up an 'splain bout zenith r
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22
The Value of Common sense.

'Oh, dearl exclaimed Mrs F., after
vainly endcavoring to pour hot water out of
the empty teakettle, 'how did / forget to
fill it, | wonderl I'm getting to be a perfect
simpleton! l wish did have little COM
mon sense!'
"But, my DEAR" interrupted Fogg, sup
pose you had Do you think you'd know
what to do with itp'
''Do with its' echoed Mrs. f., many
things. l might want to be married again,
you know, and it might save me from max
ing fool of myself a second time.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22
A fionster Petition.

A London dispatch of Monday says;
This evening, John A. Mcdonald,
member for the universities of Eding-
burg and Glasgow presented monster
petition against home rule for Ireland.
The paper bears 106,S94 signatures
of Scotchmen, weighs pa pounds and
is mile and quarter in length.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22
Too Rugged.

Over at Hudson, the people are
getting very peculiar. They've just
had some one impeached and removed
from office on the paltry charge of
confscating cord wood belonging to
another party. Great C@sarl if a
man is to be punished simply because
his memory forgot to Jog him as to
an abstract of title to wood pile,
there's mighty little safety for country
editors, rural ministers, or duly adj
nitted members of the bar. We do
not wonder at Hold Taylor's leaving
Hudson on the next train after the
outrageous decision had been render
ed; nor are we surprised to hear that
Judge Humphrey discounted the army
of Flanders on emphatic expressions;
or that Senator Spooner won't visit
his home until everything cools off;
and that the old settlers do not feel
well, any way.-Chippewa Herald.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22
A Cautious Editor.

Harper's Bazaar: Country editor TO
spring poet). AS you say, the poem
is full Of fire and genius, no doubt, but
| would be afraid to publish it."
Spring poet: ''Why?"
Country editor; Because l don't
own controlling interest in the paper,
and | might lose my situation"
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22


When dis chair can't stan on one leg an
splain any word in common use he will con-
fess his ignorance an call fur Eep! shall
fine you $1,000 fur disturoin' dis meetin',
and Professor Davis will now be- brung inr"
HE Is "BRUNG."
1t was evident to all as soon he entered
the room that the professor was Off He
grinned and bowed and scraped, and finally
took a chair near the stove. When i've
adam Jones went over 10 him and asked if
he was i'll, he replied:
''Shay! I'll fight you two rounds for
twenty-five shents p
He was drunkl As soon as Brother Gard
ner realized this fact he ordered him re-
moved from the lodge The stranger was
assisted down stairs into the alley and hash
been seen in Detroit since From the
sp'ashcs Of mud on the right board fence,
and the distance between his tracks, it il
belle we'd that he left in hurry.
Dis am tut another proof" said Brother
Gardner as he took his seat, dat when you
Pit brains agin whisky, common sense agin
gin, or Intellect agin lager beer de liquids
am bound to so under the wire ,eDgth
ahead.
A CLOSE SHAVE
Sir Isaac Walpole then roycd to take
from the table the case of the Keepcr of the
museum, who was last week suspend ID from
oice nd lined IS, 00) Sir Isaac had caro-
fully inquired into all the fats in the case
and Set.eged them to be as follows: The
keeper desired 70 run down to the pos Office
20 mai 4 letter 70 his father iIl-l law. There
present III tho museum a colore1 man
who clamel TO lie a profe ,sOr of botany at
Harvard, and he wuS asked to remlin until
the keepers return. The time occupied was
only twelve minutes, bu5 when tile keeper
returned he found the STRANGER hal de-
parted, taking with him an eight-day clock
once owned by Napoleon |. The keeper
was to b.amo, and yet he was no.. If
everybody coming along here and claiming
to be n professor at Harvard was to be
suspected and watched, the whole police
force would be kept Lusy. The clock was
probably gone hey ond recovery, but the loss
was not irreparable. Sir Isaac had in his
possession clock which Napoleon wanted
to buy, but didn't have money enough. He
would turn this In to the museum in case
the keeper vas reinstatei and his fine
mitted. 1t would take him 400 years, the
very best he could do, to pay the fine, and
he hadn't secured two hours sleep since
being suspended.
''Ben' dat dis matter has bin token up
an considered by SIGH distinguished mem
ber," said the president, 81 shall not hesitate
to comply wild de request, though ] want de
keeper of de museum to fully realTe dat he
has had powerful close shave
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22

Grace Morse, a great niece of
Commodore Vanderbilt has eloped
with and married her fathers coach
man, named George Norton. He is
of an extremely poor family, his father
having recently been sentenced to the
penitentiary for burglary.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22
Total Eclipse of the Wax Baby.

Merchant Traveler.l
Fannie is a little girl who has a big wax
doll as a companion A few days ago new
sister came to her house, and after a few
DAYS she went over to a neighbor's
well, Fannie" said the lady, where's
your wax dolla'
On" she answered, turning up her nose,
81 don't have nothin' to do with wax babies
any more. We've got a meat baby at our
house now and that takes up all my time.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22

Gen. Jack" Logan thinks that
if soldier is entitled to pension at
all, not one of them should have less
than eight dollars per month. Mr..
Logan's head is level in this respect as
in all other matters.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22

The Philadelphia and Detroit
clubs played fine game of ball last
Tuesday. Eleven innings were play
ed, and then the score stood Detroits
1, Philadelphias 0. Such game is
worth seeing.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22

Mrs. Thomspon has been confirm
ed as postmistress of the Louisville.
Ky, post office. Mr.. Blackburn
made a long speech in opposition to
the lady, but when the vote was tax
en- he had only five or six followers.
Noble Blackburn.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22

Roscoe Conkling could afford to
"strike an attitude in the New York
bribery case. He got $4,000 for
doing it. 1t would take him four
years to earn that much in the Senate.
The Canadians haye seized an
other American vessel, the Ella NJ.
Doughty, for alleged violation of the
fishing laws.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22

The latest from the Chicago
strike is summed up as follows: The
situation in the lumber district is
slightly improved. The proprietors
threaten to import lumber showers
from Michigan which if carried out
will probably cause trouble. The
planning mills are running in force
The box factories are running at full
blast. The furniture factories are still
badly crippled. The taiIors' strike is
nearly oyer. The manufacturers are
making concessions. In the Pullman
works all departments haye resumed
operations with eighteen hundred men.
Forty cabinet makers remained out.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22
A Reasonable Verdict.

GHarpers Bazarl
Young mother exhibiting haby) - What
do YOU think of the dear little darling, Maj.
Barracki
Ma. Barrack {truthful, but anxious to
asel-Er-how old is itf
Young mother-Only three months
Mai Barrack seeing a way out of it,
Oh! well, one can't expect very much, you
know, from a baby only three months old
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22

The series of Great American In
dustries in Harper's Magazine is con-
tinued in the coming number by an
article on sugar. The subject is most
thoroughly handled and copiously
illustrated. The author, r. L. Bow
ker, has gathered material from the
most eminent and recent authorities.
Beginning with brief history OF sugar
he shows its enormous production at
present, describes the Louisiana plant
ations and their work, and the mystic
rious processes of the great refneries.
Beside the sugar-cane, sorghum, beet,
maple, and glucose sugar are carefully
treated. The wonderful chimestry of
sweets is unfolded as well as the
secrets of candy-making. The paper
is compendium of valuable informa-
ton.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22

The president will review the
Grand Army of the Republic parade
in Brooklyn, n. Y, in the forenoon
of Decoration day, and will attend the
exercises of the Academy Of Music in
New York in the evening, where
Postmaster General Villas will deliver
the grafton.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22

Ohio had a cyclone last Saturday,
which did a vast amount of damage.
A train of cars which encountered the
storm was roughly handled and sew
eral passengers badly injured.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22

1t looks as though the Grand
old man" was going to get tioored in
his efforts to free Ireland from British
rule. He may fail now, but his prinei-
piles shall live, and finally triumph.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22

The morning telegram from New
York will tell you that ex-president
Arthur had bad night and that he
cannot live but a short time. In the
evening it will tell you the president
has been out riding, and looks better
than he has done for a long time. 1t
Is more pleasant to believe the latter
report, even though it may not be
true.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22

One thousand of the Pullman
ear employees at Roseland, struck for
s hours and an advance of 10 per
cent. over present wages, last Monday.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22

Gen. RoSecrans was confirmed req
lister Of the treasury by the Senate,
last Tuesday.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22

1t is worth remembering that no.
boly enjoys the incest surroundings
if III bad health. There are miserable
people about to-day with one foot on
the grave, TO whom a bottle of Park
ers Tome would do more good than
all the doctors and medicines they
have ever used.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22
PUBLIC NOTICE.

NJ Office is hereby given that shall, on Mon
~ day, June 18th, 1856, at my office, in the pres
ence of the Sheriff and Justice of the Peace of
said county proceed to draw the names of II per-
sons to serve as petit jurors at the June term of
the Circuit Court of 1856, for the county OF Doug
las to be held at the Court House in said county,
being the term which j. designated by statute as
commencing on the 18th Monday of June, 1886.
Dated May 10, 1856.
m15j5 CHARLES LORD, CIerk.
The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1886-05-22

~ Subscribe for the TIMES.
Salt Lake evening Democrat. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1885-1887, 1886-09-20
AN EXCITING TRIPLE RUNAWAY.
A Horse Attached TO IA Suiky starts
Two Others and Tips Over
Carriage.

Shortly after O'Clock this afternoon
the old race horse, Black Hawk, formerly
owned by Pendleton, but now the prop
erty OF Harry Squires, started on Il ram
page down West Temple street, and
before stopping started two more run
Always and tipped over heavy carriage.
Reaching the DEMOCRAT corner, the
horse turned east, ran into the open
space next to Pendleton's shoeing shop,
came out the west side OF the block, back
on around the corner, ran into the
hitching rail in front OF Pendeton's shop,
crowded in between the rail and horse
hitched to it, freeing that horse, then
made for the sidewalk, grazed
past the windows, turned north,
ran into the carriage OF Mrs.
T. X. Jones which stood in front of one
OF the houses just south of the Cont
mental hotel, tipped the horse over into
the ditch with the carriage on top OF it,
ran to the corner, turned west TO the City
Hotel, started another horse and wound
up no one knows where.
The horse which was released from
Pendleton's was stopped by young man
before it reached the corner. Mrs.
Jones' horse was unhitched and gotten
to his feet with no damage except that
done to the harness. OF the other run
away nothing definite has yet been
learned
Altogether it was one OF the liveliest
runaways that has ever occurred, and
that no damage was done is wonder,
indeed.
Salt Lake evening Democrat. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1885-1887, 1886-09-20

mercy extended to him if he chose to
promise to obey the law. lie said that
when these prosecutions first began there
were few who made this promise, but
they were pronounced apostates and
traitors by the church, and that there
were no longer any who daredt to promise.
He said there were few who, like Din
woodev, would admit outside that they
were willing to promise, but there were
none left who dared to come into court
and say they would obey the law.
To this Richards replied with a little
sermon about "our religion" He said
that this man had Conscientious scruples
against making a promise, and that
though he might already have deter
mined in his mind to obey the law, his
conscience would not allow him to prom
Use. Whatever he has resolved, his con-
science would not let him promise.
Mr.. Dickson again arose and showed
in eloquent terms how we have, on the
one hand the Government trying to en-
force the laws and on the other hand the
church telling the people not to obey
them.
"No, deny that" broke in Richards;
but Mr.. Dickson went on to say that
there had never yet been IL case where a
man got upin court and promised to obey
the law without his being abused by
the Deseret News; aud on the other hand
no man ever refused to obey this law
without his being upheld by this sheet.
He asked what more mercy could be
shown than in this promising to obey the
law and having sentence suspended. He
showed how it would be in case OF lar
ceny, should the defendant stand up in
open court and say that if he were re-
leased he might go and steal again be-
fore the sun set. He said that if the man
had determined to obey the law in his
own mind, it would be no violation of his
conscience to state to the Court that he
had such an intention.
The Judge then asked the defendant if
he had anything to say before sentence
was passed, and he replied that he had
not. The Judge explained what little
the law required OF him, and told him
how he could avoid the sentence Of i'm
prisonment, offering him until tomorrow
morning to think the matter over but
Lindberg was stubborn, and said that his
conscience could not change before to-
morrow morning.
1t was apparent that Lindberg would
not allow the court to do anything to
ease the burden, unless His Honor chose
to be lenient in the very face OF the de-
PENDANTS defiance OF the law. The
Judge thereupon sentenced defendant
to serve a term of six months
imprisonment on each OF the three
counts, and to pay 800 fine on each and
the costs OF the prosecution making in
all eighteen months Imprisonment and
a fine of 5000 and costs, defendant to
stand committed until the amounts are
paid.
Salt Lake evening Democrat. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1885-1887, 1886-09-20
LINDBERG SENTENCED.
A Sermon from Brother Richards
The Effects of IA stubborn
Conscience,

At 2 O'Clock this afternoon there was a
large attendance at the District Court
room, preparatory to the sentencing Of
Jonas Lindberg, who this morning plead
ed guilty to three-count indictment for
unlawful cohabtation.
When the case was announced, Mr..
Richards arose and asked for the mercy
OF the Court in this case, stating that the
defendant had large family to support,
and that they would have no means OF
livelihood during his incarceration.
Mr., Dickson replied to this with gen
tie reminder TO the effect that Lindberg,
like all others Oi his stripe, might have
Salt Lake evening Democrat. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1885-1887, 1886-09-20

Dickson hit upon plan whereby the
"convicts for conscience sake" with the
double back action improved appliance,
convicted upon their own testimony"
will soon be a thing of the past, and
springing this plan upon them this morn
ing he brought abont the reversal OF the
pleas and the speedy termination Of the
four first cases. The way it was done is
this: Mr.. Dickson informed the Church
attorney that in cases where the defend
ants pleaded not guilty, he would put his
own witnesses upon the stand and con-
vict in that way. Something had to be
done to prevent this, so the plan OF letting
the cohabs. plead guilty was adopted and
will probably be continued during the
term.
For neatness, precision and dispatch
the new plan challenges competition.
Salt Lake evening Democrat. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1885-1887, 1886-09-20
PERSONALS.

Captain Austin, the Denver livery man,
leaves for the East tomorrow.
George Rogers, agent for the G. & N. w.
and l. q st. l.. roads, is in town.
w. M. Rank, general agent of the d. &
X. G. w. at San Francisco, is in town.
General p. E. Conner, well known all over
the Pacific coast as the man who sat down
on Brigham Young and the Nauvoo Legion
during the rebellion, was in Portland yester-
day, on his way to Salt Lake.-Portland
Ne,CS, 17M.
DIR. M. l.. Morehouse, d. D., Correspond.
ing Secretary of the American Baptist
Home Mission, and resident in New York, is
in the city, and preached yesterday in the
First Baptist Church. The DEMOCRAT will
publish synopsis of his able sermon to-
morrow. DR.. Morehouse has just come from
a trip to Alaska, and on his return passage
he stopped over at the various cities and
brought gladness with him to all with whom
he came in contact. The reverend gentle
man speaks hopefully of growing senti-
ment wherever he has been which foretells
the doom of Mormon supremacy.
Salt Lake evening Democrat. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1885-1887, 1886-09-20
LOCAL JOTS.

Calanthe Lodge members are requested to
be present tonight.
The roof is being placed on the new Eigh-
teenth district schoolhouse.
The martyr MILF is doing good work,
and more grist will soon be wanted.
A runaway on Main street this morning
created good deal of excitement but did
no damage.
The sale of Bishop Tuttle's household fur
niture takes place tomorrow. l. M. Barratt
IS the auctioneer See the announcement.
Hon. VIM II. Barnes, the California ora
tor and vocalist, will be present at the A. O.
U. w. Hall this evening to entertain the
guests.
An employee of Dunne's foundry, next to
the DEMOCRAT office, had his foot badly
burned with moulten lead late Saturday
afternoon
The fight between Mcdonald and Sade at
the Opera House on Saturday night was TO
all appearances perfectly square, McDon-
aid knocked Slade out in nine rounds.
Jack Gilmer is making the little gold mill
at Osceola jump night and day: the fire
under its boilers will not 90 out until all the
ore is run or the mill wears out. The Golden
Eagle furnishes the quartz.-SoutheIm Utah
Times.
The Utah Northern is widening its grade
between Pocatello and Eagle Rock, and is
pushing work to the utmost. 1t seems pro-
bable that through cars from Omaha to
Eagle Rock will yet be run this fall.-Idaho
Register.
Henry Martin and John Landousa, two
tramps, were arraigned in the Police Court
this morning on the charge of trespass-
sleeping in barn belonging to Mr.. Can
non. Both pleaded guilty, and were fined
$40 each.
match game of base ball will be played
on Washington Square tomorrow afternoon
at 2:30, between the Railroad Nine and the
Nationals. The entire gate receipts will 90
to the winning side. Both mines are in good
trim and good game may be expected,
The unlawful cohab. cases against Chas
M. Bergstrom, five counts; John Tate, four
counts; James Higgins five counts, and
Oarl Jensen, five counts, will come up for
trial in the Third District Court tomorrow.
Pleading guilty to five count indictments is
no fun, and if it doesn't make the brethren
tired of "martyrdom," then nothing will.
George S. Bailey, who was run in by the
police on Saturday afternoon for disturbing
the peace and quiet of one Mrs. Wallace,
was arraigned in the Police Court this morn
ing, He pleaded not guilty, but the evidence
against him was very strong, so he was ad-
Judged guilty The court imposed a fine of
$l5, which, it is needless to say, he will
serve out in Jail.
Frank Treseder was taken into court this
morning and arraigned on the charge of at
tempt to murder, two counts, and pleaded
not guilty to both. Arthur Brown his at
torney, asked that the case be set for trial
immediately. Mr.. Dickson objected to this,
on the ground that the United States cases
had the precedence, and that they had al
ready been set up to October Sd. Mr.
Brown then asked that it be set for October
4th, and an order to that effect was made.
Salt Lake evening Democrat. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1885-1887, 1886-09-20
Denver& Rio Grande Western Railway
GENERAL PASSENGER DEPARTMENT,
SALT LAKE Cry, Sept. 10, 1886.

'EnAH L ASSENuEh DEPARTMENT,
SALT LAKE CRY, Sept. 10, 1886.
The public is respectfully informed that
the company's delightful bathing resort,
LAKE PARK,
Will remain open during the continuance
OF pleasant weather or until further no.
tice. The bathing train will run daily,
leaving Salt Lake City at 80 p. m, ar
irving here at 80 p. M. Every conven-
fence will be provided to render visit
to the popular resort thoroughly enjoy
able All regular through passenger
trains in both directions will also stop at
Lake Park. Especially favorable terms
to excursion parties from either Salt Lake
or Ogden will be given, and special trains
provided as desired.
j. II. BENNETT,
Gen'l Pass. Ag't.
Salt Lake evening Democrat. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1885-1887, 1886-09-20
Terrible Pains,

DR.. FLINT's HEART REMEDY banishes
sick-headache, and will prevent the re-
turn Of this most terrible OF pains, il
taken when the warning symptoms give
notice OF the recurrence OF an attack. At
druggists, $3.50 Descriptive treatise
with each bottle; or address j, j. Mack
q Co., 5. +.