davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28
old DOMINION STEAM 1>sSTN
" SHIP COMPANY. -3s.'
FOR NEW YORK.


steamers leave Richmond EVERY TUES
DAY, FRIDAY, and SUNDAY.
steamers leave New York for Richmond
EVERY TUESDAY,. THU RSDAI, aud SAT-
URDAY at 3P. NJ.
Passenger accommodations unsurpassed.
Cabin fare TO New York 1ncluding meals
and BERTH, $40; round.trip tickets. SIS
steerage. with subsistence, 81: without
subsistence. SO.
Frelghts forwarded and through bills OF
ladlpg issued for points beyond New York.
Freight received daily until L. NJ.
Manifest closed on sailing days one hour
before departure.
Passengers leaving Richmond by the
Chesapea Ike and Ohio railway at $50 \. NJ:
(ria New ports News) and the Richmond
and Petersburg railroad at l0:i9 A. NJ. on
MONDAYS, TUESDAYS, WEDNESDAYS,
TUESDAYS, and SATURDAYS. will
make connections at NORFOLK with the
stea meis leaving those days
sAILINGS THIS WEEK.
ROANOKE. Captain CoUcH, SUNDAY,
February 2sth. at IL o'clock noon
OLD DOMINION. Captain SMITH, TUES
DAY, March I'd, At 2 O'Clock Il. NJ
wYANOkE. Captain HuLpHERs. FRI
DAY, March 9Th. az q O'Clock p. ".
GEORGE W. ALLEN q CO.. Agents
40. 1901 Main STREET ard
'eso conpsnys wnnf Rockets.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28
~ Won't Work.


Blue bird. perched on an aspen limb,
In the February glitter,
You can't fool me with your siren hymn
or the twit Of your tunesome twitter;
know. while Of vernal things you blab,
That the buds don'I burst nor the brooklets
bah.
Aud that meath your promissory CAB
There's an archaeological litter.
It's a chestnut, birdie. so itis
This little tool you're footing:
You seem 10 make ityour annual :" biz"
To come NJ the first saluting
OF genial air, and ehirp about
The dandeilons' coming out,
And the rhubarb readiness TO sprout,
And the verdure's general shooting.
But blue. bird, perched on an aspen limb,
This spring you sings q spectre,
You can yawp the thing tili your senses
swim
Ia sea OF god kissed nectar,
But you can't inveigle chap that's cute
To shuttle his four ply flannel suit,
or, In moment OF rsshness. shoot
His all. wool chest protector.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28
AudroHnache.


rr,,ss written upon seeing Valentines
statue Of Andromaone'l
she sits before us in her grief
AS long ago In vanished Troy,
With dIstaff dropt from listless hands
That yainly sought their old employ.
The face Of loveliness divine
is bowed with pain It's lips compressor
How can She spin among her maids
With heart go full OF vague unrest
with loving arm she clasps her babe
Eut smiles not at his childish glee;
4 chill upOn Der spirit lies
Djm shadow of the Fate's decree.
And thus from out the misty past,
Immortal In her love and woe:
She comes TO stir our hearts to-day
With sorrows OF the long ago.
q. thou. whose plastic fingers wrought,
Though heart and brain were bowed WIN
grief
rnmindful Of the worlds acclaims,
But see King only rest-relieI-
petchance thy sorrow taught thee thus,
More than Thy fertile brain had planned,
Togiye those tears TO marble eyes
Despairing droOp to marble hand.
A.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28

mart. as We went through rather pitt
fsI.lookipg suburbs for about SIX
miles. All the houses are large
and high, and are divided on the
tenement system, which, however, rises
70 The apartment one when inhabited
NV neople who can afford to pay Tor
large suits. The windows OF these
large houses, except those dwelt in by
really wealthy tenants, are decorated
with the family linen and other clothing
hung out to dry or air, and this custom
gives deplorably poverty-stricken APP
pearance, even though the garments ex-
fibiied are pretty good. We certainly
considered six miles of it little too
much, especially when we had to bear
the nuisance Of tramways all along the
route and found it impossible to dodge
the rails. For once We were truly
thankful to be out OF the carriage aud
At rest in the hotel.
MILDRED RUSSELL.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28

BIOTCHFS, 1T INITIATING EKCPIipNS,
ITCHING TORTURES, AND LOATll-
SOME SORES CURED BY tCrl-
CVRA.
Having been n sufferer for two years and
n half frOm a disease caused 10y bruise on
the leg end having been cured hy the GU
T!CURA REMEDIES when all other meth
DDS and remedies failed. deem II my duty
to recommend them. visited Hot Springs
TO no avail and tried several doctors without
success and nj last our principal druggist
Mr.. John i. Finlay TO whom / shall ever
feel gratefully, spoke 10 me OF CUTlCtRA
and consented to give them trial, with
the result that am perfectly cured. There
is now no sore about me. | think | can
show the largest surface where my sutferngs
sprarg from OF any one In the state. The
Il TlCURA REMEDIES are the best blood
ard skin cures manufactured. | refer to
druggist JOnn 7. Finlsy and Or. ID. G. Mont
gCmeTy, both Of this place, and To DR..
smith OF Iake Lee. Miss.
f.r,enrfIic. Miss. ALEXANDER BEACH,.
Mr. feach used the Cl TICU RA RENE
DIS. at our request, with results as above
stated. \. q fISLAY Il Co. Druggists.
f,rffHIiilT MIS-.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28

= 7 7 NM = M IN II IT Is4f''TIs
have trIed for eleven wears 10 have my
wife cured OF q terrible skin disease. The
CUTlCURA REMEDIES (CCTIcURA RE-
-tIyiST. the new Blood Purifier. internal.
49, and CUIicURA. the great skin Cure, ana
tITItUNA SOAR. an exquisite SKIN betu,
Ter. cXtcrnally.l have done IN SIX weeks
what ] have tired fOr eleven years To have
done. You shall have TIE particulars a.
>Cun aS : can give them 70 you. and rs We
are 20 well Known IN tins part Of the cpun-
nv 10 VIII benefit you. and the remedies
VIII cure al who use them.
I{oUstU,. hU CHARLES ii. WHITE.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28

CUTIcURA EFWEBIE- are sold everywhere.
Trice: LTTICI'EA. 80 cents; REsJLvENr
sl.C0: soar, 70 cents. Prepared hy the
PoT1ER DRUG AND CUENlCAL Co., Boston.
Mass.
S,BE jor " Hour fo care skin DiyedSes'
CRIBS. rimplts. Red. Rough, and Oily
II i'm uSe TIrIiCIfRA SOAP.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28
NORFOLK AND WESTERN RAIL.
~ ROAD.
SCHEDULE IN EFFECT NoVEMBEB
70, 1855.

SCHEDULE IN EFFECT NOVEMBER
70, 1855.
LEAVE RICHMOND
lO:49 A. NJ. Daily, utd Richmond and Pc
tersburg railroad. Arrive Pc.
tersburg 1880 A. NJ; leave Pc
tersburg 12:95 T.. A. daily; ar.
rive at Norfolk 800 p. NJ.
s35 A. NJ. Daily, except Sunday, ria Rich
mOnd and Petersburg railroad
Arrive ut Petersburg $50 A. VI
No. 3 leaves Petersburg 9:35 A.
M. for farmville. Lyuchburg
Roanoke. Bristol, Knoxville
and all points South aud West.
2:4s F. N, Daily, uid Richmond and Pc
tersburg railroad. Arrives Pc
tersburg $50 T.. VI. Leave Pc.
tersburg $40 2. NJ. daily, arriy.
ing Norfolk $40 r. NJ.
500 A. NJ. Daily, except Sunday, via Rich
mond and Allegheny railroad
Arrives at Lynchburg 200 T.. VI.
connecting with train No.
leaving Lynchburg at 2:l0 T..
VI. daily for all points south
and West.
500 =. NJ. Daily. except Sunday. MA Rich
mOnd ana Allegheny railroad.
Arrive at Lynchburg $50 A. NJ.
sleeper Richmond 10 Lynch
burg. connecting with train
leaving Lynchburg st $40
A. N.
PULLMAN SLEEPING-CAR ACCOMMO
DATIONS.
SO. t-Richmond TO Lynchburg, Hicn-
mond and Allegheny railroad. and Roanoke
10 New Orleans, Chattanooga 10 Jackson
Vile, Chattanooga To Memphis.
No 3-RoauOke to Chattanooga, WlthsW
change. ,,
Tickets, baggage checks and all informa'
tion can be obtained at Richmond and Pc
fersburg railroad depot. 1000 Main street
Richmond aud Allegheny railroad depot
and 1908 Main street. A. IOIh,
JOSEPH II. SANDS,
las General Manager, Roanoke. va.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28
ADtEaIIssNG AGENCY.
GLIDING.

DUBY'S ROYAL GLIDING.
III Rich rs Gold i.eaf"--N y. Herald.
GiLDe EvERYTHISG-FKAMEs FusNi'
TURF, FRFscoKs. ORNAMENTS, FANs, PHO.
los. &C. ANY one can usei IT, A Camels flair
Brush In each Box. Price. so cents. Ash
for RUHY'S GLIDING. Refuse all suhst.
tutes, Sold By Paint-pealsrs. Druggists and
6tstioneR.
New York Chemical Mfg Co, New York
~ 2o-Su6m
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28
FREIGHT.

Freight received daily for Norfolk. Ports
mouth, SIN .thteld, Hampton, Wayerly, and
HIcksford. Va; Washington. ID. c.; New.
bern. Washington. and Tarboro, y. C.: all
stations on Atlantic and Danville railroad,
Seaboard and Roanoke railroad. Norfolk
southern railroad. and Eastern North Caro-.
lima generally; also. for Eastern Shore Of
Virginia. and all regular landings on James
river, at LOWEST RATES, and through
bills issued.
l.. Il. TATUM. Superintendent.
ia2e No. ll0e Main street and Rockets.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28
sTORAGE.
PERSON A..

ITO WHOM 1T NAY CONCERN ::
i Take notice, that I. GEORGE a. La
THROp. trustee. OF the city Of Richmond.
Va, have appointed :. $. BUGG my agent
for me and In my name as trustee 10 con
duct q RErAI l. GENERAL STORE In Rich.
mond. Va My said agent IL authorized and
empowered 10 sell end buy for cash ONLY.
Re Is wv q. A. LATffaUP n co.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28
RAILROAD LINES.
ARRIVE RICHMOND.

coop, NJ. MAIL daily except Sundayl.
Io.o5 A. NJ, ACCOMMODATION uaily teD
,.o. n NIGHT EXTREss daily Tex
cept Monday
CONNECTIONS.
AT Richmond with associated raliWays
and Richmond. Fredericksburg ana foJo'
mac railroad; at Lyncnoorg WIN WIN xr
railroad : at Clifton Forge with chesapeake
and Ohio railway at Lexington with baltl'
more and Ohio railroad.
SiSepino.car attached TO Night Express u
Trains marked daily Except sunday.
Tickets sold TO all points. offices: 1900
east Main street. 1000 Main, and AZ Rich.
mond and Alleghany deP9, ,c HEiqth an'
General Passenger and Express Agent.
DICHMOND, FREDERICKSBURG
III AND POTOMAC RAILROAD.-Sched.
ule commencing NOVEMBER Is, 1855
eastern standard time:
500 A. NJ, leaves Byrd-Street STATION
daily; stops only at Ashland,
junction. Milford, and frede.
ricksburg. Sleeper to Wash.
ingtOn. Leaves Washington
for New York at IL A. NJ
HOY A. NJ, leaves Byrd.Street station
daily except sunday. Sleeper
to Washington. Leaves WASH
ingtOn for New York al 4:20
+. NJ, also by limited at $50
$40 p. NJ, leaves Byrd-Street station
daily. Sleeper TO New York.
1929 A. NJ, arrives at Byrd. Street station
daily. sleeper from New York.
2:Ss 2. NJ, arrives at Byrd. Street station
daily; stops al Fredericks.
burg Milford. and Junction.
Sleeper from Washington.
e:Os T. NJ, arrives at Byrd. Street station
daily except sunday. Sleeper
from Washington.
ASHLAND TRAINS.
DAILY EXCEPT SUNDAYS:
400 Y. NJ, accOmm OdatiOn, leaves
Broad street station; arrives
at Ashland at L. VI.
6.O4 Y. NJ, leaves klha; arrives at Ash
land at 6.4i T. VI.
100 \. NJ, arrives at Elba; leaves Ash
land at 643 A. VI.
S.55 A, NJ, accommodation, arrives nj
Broad. Street station; leaves
Ashland at Z A. VI.
5.59 Z. NJ, arrives at Elba leaves Ash.
land at 5:l2 L. VI.
CA. TAYLOR. General Ticket Agent.
r. r. d. MYERS, Genera superintendent.
CHESAPEAKE AND ONO RAIL.
" WAY.-FEBRUARY Il, 1886.
LEAVE RICHMOND.
q:55 A. NJ. Through and Local Mail ex'
cept sunday. ,,,-,
e.45 A. NJ. For Newport News Old Point
Comfort. and Norfolk daily eN-
cept sunday.
s:l5 p. ". For Newports News, Old
Point and Norfolk. Except
Sunday.
400 +. ". GordonsVile accommodation,
except sunday.
Sl5 7. NJ. For Louisville and Cincinnati
Fast Express. with through
Pullman cars. Daily.
ARRIVE RICHMOND.
$40 A. ~ From tOi louisville.
lI:55 4. NJ, From NorlO k, old Point, and
Newport's News, except sun
day.
$40 p. ". From local points and the
West, except sunday.
s.IO Z. ". From Oid Point NewpOrfs
News. aud Norfolk daily ex.
rppi sunday
s.55 =. NJ. From Louisville ar Cinc!n
natl. tast express lie ~.
lprOt. Seventeenth and BrOad streets.
Tickets at 1000 Main street and depot.
II. ". FULLER,
General Passenger Agent.
WILLIAMS c. WGCKHAM, Second Vice
President. te -
DICHMOND, FREDERICKSBURG
III AND POTOMAC RAILROAD.
THROUGH ALL.RAIL FASr-FRElGHi
LINE TO AND FROM BALTIMORE,
PHILADELPHIA. NEW YORK,
AND EASTERN AND
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28

Correspondingly quick time to other
points Through bills of lading issued at
low rates, &. 4. TAYLOR.
ia 80 General Passenger Agent.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28

ONLY TWELVE HOURS BETWEEN
RICHMOND AND BALTIMORE IN
EACH DIRECTION.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28

/
Thea untofsu dcap
he tof said "A cash. '..''.' 90
s. ~ e
ICanso nlorgs
FATE ANDo
OIL
Avn LnNLs DIV
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28

.Daily. fDaily except sunday.
STOPPING-PLACES.
Nos. 40, AZ. and 43 make no stops. No.
a. stops only on signal at Chester. Nos. ~
and as stop only on signal at Chester. Cen.
trala. and Manchester. Nos 80. 81, 80, and
80 stop at all stations for passengers
PULLMAN.CAR SERVICE.
on trains No. 40 and As sleeping cars be-
tween Washington and Charleston. ON
trains No. 40. ~, ~, aud As sleeping cars
between Washington and Jacksonville, Fla.
on trains Nos. Al and 10 sleeping cars be-
tween New York and Jacksonville. Fla.
and between New York and Charleston,
and Aiken. =. G.
THE ONLY ALL-RAIL ROUTE TO NOR.
FOLK.
LEAVE. ARRIVE.
Richm' d-.l0:4e A. VI. Norfolk. $50 7. VI.
Richm'd- PAS T.. VI. Norfolk. $40 i. NJ.
Norfolk..t $40 A. VI. Richm d 1888 An.
Norfolk 9:35 A. VI. Richmd. 1870 Z. VI.
Nos. "a and IS make close connection 10
and from Farmville. I.y nchburg. and south
western points. and way-stations on the
Norfolk and Western railroad. No. 35 run
ming daily and No. "a daily (except sun
day. j.: H. hENhi
Superinte ndent Of Transportation.
T. NJ. EMERSON, General Passenger Agent
SOL HAAS. Traffic Manager ia 20
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28

ONLY ALI.-WATER ROUTE.
JAMES RIVER BY DAYLIGHT
GREAT TOURIST ROUTE.
JAMESTOWN, DUTCH GAP, AND WAX
SCENERY.
CHEAPEST ROUTE.
RATES MUCH LESS THAN HALF
CHARGED BY ANY OTHER ROUTE.
FARE To NORFOLK. Sl-NO LIMIT.
WAY.LANDING FAXES from Csc. TO 81.
Second.class tickets still lower.
FARE TO WANERLY, sl.5O.
FARE TO HlCkSF0SD, s225.
FIKST.CLASS MEALS ON EU SOPEAN
PLAN.
The elegant rebuilt and fast steamer
ARIEL.
carrying United States Mail)
H. {. CLIFFORD, Commander,
leaves Richmond every
MONDAY. WEDNESDAY. AND FIJI DAY
att A. NJ. (STREEr-CARS CoNNECI IN
FULL TINED for above named places ar
irving at Norfolk at 5 l.. VI. Returning. the
steamer leaves Norfolk. Portsmouth, aud
NewpQrt's News on alternate days, arriving
AT Richmo about L. NJ.
Through tickets on sale on steamer ami al
CARRIERS Agency, 1000 Main street. Bag
gage checked through. -
STATE-ROOMS ENGAGED FOR DAY
OR NIGHT.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28


the morning.
URANUS Is morning star until the
26sh, when, like Mars aud Jupiter, he
takes his turn in coming into opposition
with the sun, This event occurs on the
26th, At s o'clock in the morning, after
which be becomes evening star. IL Is
seldom that three planets are in oppo'
\ sition within the short period OF twenty
DAYS. Thus the earth, Mars, Jupiter,
and Uranus are nearly in line with
The sun, and all pulling upon him
nearly In the same direction by the
combined force Of their attraction. We
4 have faith to believe that no harm TO
the system will result from the situa-
ton. II has occurred before and will
occur again, while the sun and his
(amily pursue their appointed course.
Uranus may now be easily picked up
4 With small telescopes by sweeping the
sky southeast Of Jupiter. lie viii come
into view as tiny disc OF delicate
green color. When his position is
4 known in the telescope, he may be de-
tecsed by the naked eye as star Of the
sixth magnitude.
Tbs right ascension Of Uranus on the
lsk Is l2h. 25m., his declinstion is 10
57< south. his diameter Is 33'< S..
and he is in the constellation Virgo.
Uranus rises on the LIST soon after
halfpsst o'clock In the evening; on
the 3lst be sets about halfpast 5
o'clock in the morning.
SA1VRx is,ths evening altar. His lassre
slightly diminishes Is bis distance from
~ earth Increases. On the cd, vt .
o'clock Ia the morning, be is in quadrs-
in1e With The sun. lie is then on the
uisridisa q sunset and sets about mid
siehf. Gsywill DO the only planet yisi-
~ h the vest in the early evening ex-
xcpiIrg Nsrsury, who viii share the
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28
INSURANCE STATEMENTS.
py ArrHoa,rr % r,e ~
GUARANTEE COMPANY OF NORTH AMERICA.

.NSrh STATEMENT YEAR ENDING THE pE
n
AMERICA hSIRANCE COMPANY Or MED uNDEt
iUFii ACCOUNTS COMMONWEALTH
or
COMPANIES AIIRONED FEBRUARY
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28
TRAINS NoRTHwARD.

- Leave Arrive
No. Petersburg. Rich mond.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28


but scattered, the walls are still cover
ed with heliotrope in blossom, and the
morning glories are rampant.
THE FRENCH FLEET.
The next morning we threw open the
windows to let in the soft, balmy air
we exchange summer clothing, and soon
sally out to enjoy stroll round. The
French feet were off the bay, with the
intention OF going through their gun and
torpedo practice. We saw the water
spout up far beyond where we had
thought the horizon was, but it was
impossible for US to judge how far the
shots went. 1t was quite an interesting
sight. The ships were first drawn up
in line, firing one after another; then
they were drawn up in two lines dag
onally from, the shore aud fired again.
During our visit to Monte Carlo we
saw guests who were here in the spring.
We wonder if they are passers-through
like ourselves, or if they have been
here gambling hard all the time. We
also wonder if they are making the
same remarks about US. The agave
or century.plant grows here to tre-
mendous size and seemingly without
any trouble Of cultivation. 1t is said
to flower once in twenty or thirty
years, and from all appearances after
it has lowered it withers away and
dies. The flower bursts up from a
spatbe in the middle Of the plant, and
the stalk under favorable circum-
stances grows as high as twenty feet.
At this time Of the year the flower
stem resembles in height and general
appearance a fr-tree that has lost its
lower branches. The stem is about
six inches in diameter, and for sum
mer's growth ia remarkable.
THE MoNTE-cARLO SEASON.
The season properly SO called begins
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1886-02-28

THE MoNTE.cARLO SEASON.
The season properly so called begins
The Sunday morning news. [volume] (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1886-1891, 1886-10-03
To parade in PhIludelphIa.

Chief Murphy has made all arrange
ments to have squad of thirty-three Off
GERS of the Jersey City Police department,
under command of Captains Farrier and
McKaig, participate in the great Pniladel-
phia Police Parade next Thursday. The
men who will go were selected ON account
of their fine military bearing and splendid
physique. Their names are Blanchard,
Bruen, Barry, Burch, Cooper, Donovan.
Frauham, Goetz, Holderer. hopkins, Har-
rington, Holmes, Hartman, +. Jackson, j.
jackson, Morris, Mulcox. McNally, Nc
Intyre, Mcguire, Newman, Park, Purdy,
Post, Rickerich, Russell, Scott, Nathaniel
Smith, Shellworth, Valentine, Wohlleben,
Walsh and Wade.
The Sunday morning news. [volume] (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1886-1891, 1886-10-03
veteran,s SONS IL Earnest.

The Department of New Jersey, Sons of
Veterans, it will be remembered, as the
Netos has announced, was recently organ
lied. Already it shows signs of becoming
great organization, and sons of honor
ably discharged soldiers, sailors and ma
rines of the late war for the Union de-
sirous of joining the order will be furnished
with blank applications by any of the Post
adjutants or the chief mastering officer, at
bis residence, Gil Newark avenue, either
by mail or on personal application. A
meeting of the new Department was held
last night at Ruth's Hall, Union Hill. and
the folIowing-nam officers elected: De-
partment Commander, Alphonso Thourot;
S. V. c., A. ]. Alderman; j. V. @, +.
Ruehl; Quartermaster General, Fred Go
bells; Adjutant General, Rudolph Slater;
Mastering and Installing Officer, George
E. CROSBY; Inspector General, @. P.
Ahrens; Medical Director, Williom p.
Ryan; Judge Advocate, John ]. Doran /;
Chaplain, II. W. Stitch; Officer of the Day,
Philip Heck.
The Sunday morning news. [volume] (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1886-1891, 1886-10-03
FUN

You can't have the last word with
chemist. He always has a retort.
The man who sits down to wait for
some body's Old shoes will need cushion
on his chair.
When Lieutenant Hem saw the May
flower cross the line first and noticed
sorrowful look on his wife's face, he
turned to her and remarked: ''What hol
my gal-a-tearH The crew tainted
Washington Post.
Charleston certainly keeps stiff upper
lip, but what it is particularly anxious to
do is to keep stiff upper crust.-[B Bur.
lington Free Press.
s.Mattie, Matte" called an Omaha
dame to her daughter, II do wish you
would play something besides Wagner. /
am SO sick Of it." II am not at the piano,
ma" responded the daughter from an ad-
joining ROOM "Then. who is it?"
Nurse and tue baby."-[Omaha World.
Creditor-Can you let me have my lit
tie bill? Extraordinarily but don't
destroy it; may want to pay something
on it in the future.
"This is very healthy place" observed
Catskill boarding mistress. "Yes-for
chickens" said the boarder; II have been
here several seasons and haven't seen a
dead one yet" She took the hint.
Northumberland you have it bound in
Turkey or Morocco2 Purchaser-Oh.
mercy No. What's the use of sending
it away off there? Have it bound III Bos-
ton.
Miss Clara-Do you not think; Mr..
Featherly, that Miss Smith, whom we saw
last evening. is a very plain person. Mr..
Featherly-Yes, indeed; think she is
the homeliest girl | ever saw, present
company, of course, always ex-um-that
is Yes, she is certainly very plain
person. Are you lawn tennising auy this
season, Miss Clara?
The Sunday morning news. [volume] (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1886-1891, 1886-10-03

sleigh, with noisy confusion of talk and
laughter, aud the bells struck up merriy
as it dashed away, with Lint and Laura
waving goodbye from the doorway.