Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1886-10-08
ABOUT MARRIAGE.
Some Plain Talk tn Women by One of The
Most Noted of Their Sex.

Whether they are sufficiently honest
to acknowledge it or not, ninety-nine
girls out of every hundred look forward
to marriage as matter of course. 1t
would be better for them and for their
future husbands were this taken into
account in the training of girls, and
without teaching that single life must
be empty and unsatisfactory, yet in
struct them that, as matrimony will |
probably be their destiny, they should
fit themselves for it, not only by train
ing in domestic duties, but by the study
of gentleness, forbearance and unselfish-
ness.
A blessed provision of nature often
overlooked is the change worked in
woman's disposition by love. If the
sentiment be worthy of the name, the
deep, strong affection from which alone
marriage should spring, and not mere
passing fancy. the tendencies will be to
awaken all that is best and nobfest in
the heart "Old things are passed
away, all things are become new"
Looked at by this fresh, true light, little
deprivations, petty economies, small
sacrifi ~es-and even large ones-be-
come burden to be embraced and en-
joyed for the sake of the one with whom
they are shared.
Occasionally wife may be found
who is sufficiently devoid of womanli-
ness and. generosity as to sigh over the
immunity from care she knew before
her MARI age and to reproach the hus-
provide her with the luxuries she
Graves. Such creature, however,
would not have been improved by
wealth. Sometimes prosperity seems
to have sweetening and ennobling eff
feet upon natures which adversely has
narrowed and hardened, but as rule
those who can not stand poverty with
out becoming embittered are not fit for
riches.
The custom of early marriages has,
perhaps wisely, fallen into disuse. The
title of "old maid" is no longer con-
ferred upon woman who remains sin
gle until twenty-five. More girls marry
within year or two after that age than
five years before it. There are both
advantages and disadvantages in the
former system. Youthful judgement is
prone to be harsh and unsparing, and
it may we'll be questioned whether the
larger proportion of happy marriages
are not those formed after twenty-three
rather than earlier.
Another objection to boy and girl
matches is that they are likely to be the
result of accident instead of choice.
The fancy is readily captivated when
one has seen little of the world, and
many man or woman in later Life
shrinks with repugnance from mar
rage which seemed altogether desirable
when neither was out of the teens. Ex-
ceptions to this on y prove the rule.
Its truth may be attested by the fact
that there is not one man or woman out
of fifty who will not acknowledge hav-
ing been the victim of some youthful
flame of which the memory brings no
pang, but only a sensation of amuse-
ment slightly tinctured with disgust.
The youthful love is very. real, too
while it lasts and causes such alterna-
tons of bliss and misery as to fairly
thing. But it differs as completely from
the affection of ripper years as do the
stumbling, lettering steps of child
from the firm, assured tread of man.
The early marriages of our grand
parents are sometimes quoted in justifi-
cation of the practice, but times have
changed since then. In spite of the
hustle and hurry that make ten years of
the n neteenth century equal to forty
of the seventeenth, the age
at which young men and women
conclude their scholastic education
and launch themselves into the world
of business or pleasure is steadily grow
ing later. Boys and girls colleges are
increasing the age at which pupils are
adm ted. 1t used to be thought moth
ing unusual for youth to begin his
collegiate course at fourteen; now it is
equally common for him to postpone
. his matriculation until he is seventeen
or eighteen. Few girls are graduated
from finishing schools or seminaries
under nineteen or twenty, while those
who take regular college course con-
tinue their routine of study even later.
The girl wants her swing in society be-
fore she settles down to married life,
while the man has his business or pro.
fession to acquire and his position to
gain in the world before he can serious
r ly contemplate taking unto himself 6
wife.
If special training be necessary in
the preparation of woman for mar.
riage, it is no less important for a man.
This is fact that is generally over.
looked. A great deal is said about the
) beauty of gentleness and unselfshness
in woman, and of the need of her
possession of these qualities in making
true home happiness. But unless these
facts are glaringly apparent in man
! they rarely provoke adverse criticism
The question is sometimes asked upon
the announcement of an engagement
"Is he good enough for. herp" but his
!. peccadilloes are seldom subm tied to tho
keen examination to which hers are
: subjected.
1t is common habit to lay the blame
upon a woman's shoulders If a home il
not Deaceful and haHpy except in case,