Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1886-06-04
THE DOWN-HILL ROAD.

THE DOWNFALL ROAD.
81 guess never told ye bout Josiah's
accident that he had few years ago, did
!, when he and l was goin' to Murry-
vile, tradin'2 Wal, if l hain't, then
will, that is, if you won't tell him that |
told ont, cause he's alias sayin' wom-
an can't keep nothin' to herself, and l
allow there is some things l can't keep,
and this is one on 'em.
Gas was goin' to say, Josiah had got
to go and git a lot Of stuff, some paint, a
few rails to fix the fence with, some
meal an bran, an one thing an another,
don't remember jest what now, only l
had occasion to remember these few. I'd
got to have some cotton cloth, caliker,
molasscs, sugar, etc, 50 ! told him |
guessed I'd go along too. So l packed
some eggs into a peck measure of oats,
an / had pretty near pound of feathers
tied up in a paper bag that l had been
savin' along, so 1 thought I'd take 'em
an turn 'em towards my cloth an
things.
''We loaded up an got started early
one Saturday mornin' We took the old
gray mare am the lumber-wagin. Ye
sec Josiah thought he could bring the
rails better in a long wagin. The dash
board was split off pretty low down, but
he said he guessed twould hold all we
should want to bring without spiIlin'
out. So we drove along an got to town
about ten o'clock.
81 went round to Jacobs's and sold my
eggs, an to Hyde & Taylor's with my
feathers, but they wouldn't give me my
price, SO / Jest bsat sena raeIS into enc
wagin, an went to Loomis's and bought
my cloth and things, am got back to
Williams's stable - where Josiah alias
keeps his horsc-at jest two o'clock, an
he want there, so l went to the milliner's
shop to git my bunnit fixed, an so told
the stable feller to tell Josiah where !
was, an to come after me with the team.
When l got there the buunit hadn't been
touched, an in a few minutes up drove
Josiah. Now, if you ever went any
where with man that's alias in hurry,
why, then, it's no use for me to under
take to tell yc what I went through with
a-tryin' to keep that man from goin' of
without me or sassin' that milliner. But
we got started at last, and Josiah says,
says he:
We've got sich a load, and its SO
kinder hot, I'm goin' to take the down
hill road; it's a good deal higher that
way than It's tother, an better road,
too, except that pcsky HILL
"'Yes, says ], "pesky hilp is jest
where l shan't go. I've rid down that
hill once, a-holdin' on with all my might,
an like ter pitched out the wagin head
fust. No, sir, if you go that road you'll
have to stop an let me git out
"Now you know Josiah as well as
do; he'll do anything to save a cent o
money or minutes time, and he's ALA
sayin' "time is money"
"Wal, let him have his way ruthe'
than to have any more words about 1t
but when we got to the hill 1 got out
an after Josiah had took a good cud o
tobacker into his mouth, he and the ole
mare logged along; but see few BRAN
Bile berries longside the road, and stop
ped to pick few on 'em, when | heer(
somethin' 90 kerslam, and there the ole
mare was, flat down, the wagin kinde
standin' on end, an Josiah a-sprawlln
around on the horses back, an the Ju!
O. molasses, pot O paint, an measure 0
oats on top of him, an somethin' o
ruther had wet my bag of feathers an
made a big hole int, and things wa
kinder squeezed onto 'em, so that the.
was a-puffin' out in all directions. Tn
cork got out o. the jug, an the fence
rails was stan'in' in the air, some on 'en
cross-ways an l don't know what not
If that didn't beat all the sights l eve
see. never was so tickled in my life
an if it had killed him don't believe
could have helped laffin', for there h
lay, covered with paint, n.olasso@, feath
ers, oats, bran an dirt an madde
man you never see than he was.
'Now, Josiah don't very often swea
in my hearin', but I tell yc there was
blue streak ont down that hill that after
noon. what want already streaked witt
paint and molasses. Says /;
"'Josiah, what's happenedG Don't y
like the down-hill road9'
"'Consarn it! that's woman all over
Amt satisfied with seein' a man stow
round in this way, without twittin' on IL
bein' his own fault; an that aint all; y
won't sleep wink tonight 'tilye'vc tol'
ev'ry man, woman an child in the neigh
borhood.'
81 jest stood there and hid on to my
sides It'll l thought l should go on, an
when got so l could speak, says /; 20
siah Jones, you're picture fer Comics
Al,,.o.n,l- .f a.,or 4hara xuao ono antitlel