West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1886-11-04
CRANKY OPERATORS
WHO HAUNT THE BOARD OF TRADE
AND THE BUCKET SHOPS"

The Man Who Hung on Too Long-Tho
Cycle Crank and the Man with "A Cor
ncr on the Wcathcr-Faith I'm Clairvoy-
ants-A Photographer Luck.
The atmosphere about the board Of
trade is peculiarly favorable TO the de-
velopment g. 4 cranks. The soft brethren
drift into "thc alley" the bucket shops
and ultimately into the inadhOuse or tho
grave. Some turn their pcculiarities to
profitable use, but i'm majority OF cases
the confirmed cranks become dctestablc
nuisanccs.
One poor old man, who Is IA familiar
figure about the corridors of the board of
trade building, is what is known as a bull
crank. Fifteen or twenty years ago, or
perhaps less remotely than that, even he
was in business on change. He was a
Spectator in small way, but never knew
when TO take in profits, and so almost in
variably lost money. Once he caught on
ut the bottom when Lyon, Sturgis or
somebody started a corner, and he hung
on and doubled up until his profits in the
deal represented n cool 500 900 His
friends begged and besought him TO get
out; but no. corn was going TO So n
bushel. He went out driving with his
wife one morning and when he returned
an hour later, IL was To learn that the
corner had burst and that his 800, 600
and everything else he possessed had
been swept away. The shock unsettled
his mind, but he has haunted the scenes
of his former adventures ever since,
bothering spectators, brokers, Office
boys, settling clerks and visitors with
his crazy statistics and market letters.
The weather crank is numerous, but
as yet not an offensive type of individual
of ~ tf2,,r
tragically toward the weather chart of
the board of trade, "do You see that2
The monsoon is about TO begin i'm the In
dian ocean. 1t will stop the shipment of
wheat form India, and England will be
paying us $l.50 bushel for our wheat "
The market went right down % cents n
bushel, and IL has never got within speak
ing distance of the line upon which IT.
was resting when the weather crank
made his monsoon prediction. Some OF
the weather cranks are not so cranky as
they seem
One operator who gravitates between
the stock yards and the board Of trade
usually gets ahead of the signal service
bureau from twenty -four TO foTty-eight
hours on sensational weather changes,
and bets his own money on the accuracy
of his predictions. He cleaned up 81 900
on n corn deal last week, having guessed
the Manitoba frost far enough ahead OF
Gen. Hazen's bureau engine to enable
him to load up before anybody else
thought about such thing. Then when
everybody wanted TO buy, he sold out
He admits that his predictions won't al
ways do TO work on but says if he can
ever master the science Of meteorology he
Will be IA millionaire. 10 will knock Col
Sellers eye water clean out of sight.
THE CYCLE CRANK.
Then there is the cycle crank lie has
figured To- n nicely that periods of dcpres-
sion and initiation follow one another at
regular intervals. There are the great
cycles and subsidiary or smaller cycles
1t is in the power of any man provided
with cyclical charts, TO determine pre-
cisely when commercial changes are
going to take place. To be sure, the way
farer who fixes his eyes on the mountain
top away off yonder on the horizon of the
chart is liable 10 fall over one of the
many intervening precipices and break
his neck trying to get there, just as the
Spectator may lose his margin in any
one OF the many unthought-of undula-
tons in market prices, to be encountered
on the way from lower TO higher ranges:
but these mishaps never shake the cyclic
crank in his belief in the absolute correct
ness OF his theory. He may be broke,
ldhctl uuu hungry, Wntn IDe market
crosses the line he had prophcsied would
be reached, but the satisfaction he enjoys
in witnessing the triumph of his theory,
counterbalances tho chagrin he feels over
his failure TO 'get there pccuniarily
The cyclical crank in various stages OF
development is very numerous on and
about the exchanges, and he is not always
unlucky.
The gentlemen who operate on tips
from the world beyond must not be
omitted from the list of cranks Old
Commodore Vanderbilt speculated on
spirit tips. lie stuck to one clairvoyant
as long rs the pointers turned out profit
ably. When the tips lost him money it
was his custom 10 kick the unlucky seer
into the street, loaded down with curses.
He had no use for spirits that played him
false. II is related that he always had
from ono TO twenty clairvoyants in his
employ constantly.
There is a rich grain Spectator on
Change who follows tips from the un-
seen world so long as they turn out right
from the break" but he will never
stand more than Z cent per bushcl loss
on them, and rarely more than Is cent il
he can help it. lie has operated on this
plan for fifteen years, and, though not
q thigh roller, ~ has amassed "a fortune
OF $3.50, 600 or $500, OO0 which he says is
better than working at tclcgraphcr'5
desk for $50 week.-Chicago News.
4 IftfIo Parable