davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-10-27
BRIGHT BITS.

HE WAS A sTRANGER.-"Do you put an 'e'
N whisky here" asked new reporter of a
Kentucky paper.
so" replied the editor, who was slightly
deaf; I'VE put nothing IN whisky here. We
take 1t straight."-LiIe.
EDITOR REID, of the New York Tribune, has
purchased a 100000 residence, but sub
scrlbers TO his excellent journal will please
send IN their onions. potatoes and cord wood
Just the same, for purchase Ike that always
plnches ye patient editOr.-HtnneGp0Li
Tribune.
TRAMP-Will you please give me three
cents to get over 10 Hunters Point with?
Gentleman-What do you want to do IN
Tramp live on air, sir. and l want to go
over there to get a good square meai.-FeS0
FORK Sun.
"YoU know something about music, don't
you, Joggins$'
"A lutte, Shooper."
Then what does this paper mean when it
speaks Of the higher kinds of muslc?"
Must mean upper attic, | think. "-Pitts-
burg Chronicle.
"HOw's them peasY" she asked.
The peas are very nice, madame" replied
the tramp, with his mouth full, but l wish
you would give me four tined fork. instead
OF THIS spoon, to eat them with may be a
tramp now,' he added bitterly, but Eve
seen better days."-The C0te,er.
SAY. old man, have You heard from Short
lately 1 wonder how he Is getting on"
Il haven't heard from MIN for wear; so I
suppose he must be making money!"
"How so? What do you mean?"
why, If he wasn't he would have tried to
borrow OF me before thls.-LOt0eH Citizen.
CHIEF OF POLICE-You want a place IN the
detective department.
Applicant-Yes, sir. | am willing to under
take
Chief OF Police-You can go. Our bureau is
full of undertaken. | am looking for detec-
tlves who can overtake.-PhiLldelDhi CAL.
CUsToMER-see here, sir. that new patent
filter 10 fraud.
DeRler-In what way?
why, it makes the water taste ten times
worse than 1t was before"
TASTES of the filter, eh?'
yes"
'Well. that-that flavor is put in so you'll
know it's been filtered, don't you know
Omaha World.
"WHAT is your business?" inquired the
Judge.
Pm a merchant. your honor"
"a merchant? What do you deal in?"
political influence, your honor"
"a peculiar commodity. certainly" said
the Judge, with a smile. "And how much DO
you charge for this political influence NAV |
ask ?"
Fifteen cents a drink. two for quarter I"
came forth with prom ptness that completely
staggered the Judge and the entire court
room. -Herchdnt 1rdUeler.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-10-27
Wizards Return,

Mr.. Henry Wizards return to this cOun-
try, after an absence in Germany Of a
little more than two years, appears to
have caused genuine pleasure among
Wall street capitalists. Mr.. Willard was
ruined financially In January, 1884, by
the failure of the Northern Pacific Rail-
way Company, of which he was Presi-
dent, to meet its liabilities. He had made
a great fortune in that road, the greater
part of which he gave up to meet the de-
mands of his creditors. When be went
abroad he had the good will and respect
of Wall street. Hence. he is given a warm
welcome on his return.
There is no DOUBT that Mr.. Willard pos
sesses remarkable financial talents. He
may be too visionary, and his Judgment
may sometimes be at fault, but no one
dOu ITS his ability to conceive great
schemes and conduct them to a success
iul issue. He would have been successful
in the Northern Pacific enterprise had it
not been that his engineers made great
mistake in their estimates of the cost of
completing it. They stated that the cost
wonld be about $50, 000,0 600, and Mr.. Vii
lard made his plans with that under
standing. The cost, however, was beyond
100000 900, and very naturally his plans
resulted disastrously. The road was COM
pleted, however, and some day, doubtless,
it will pay a fair dividend to it's stock
holders
MIR. Willard now, no doubt, has other
schemes in view. He has not returned
to New York empty-handed. He repre-
sents a syndicate of foreign bankers, and
in this capacity, as agent for them, will
make some large investments. Among
German bankers there is still a great deal
of confidence in his financial ability, and
there is no question but that he now has
about all the money to invest that he
wants. 1t would not be surprising il he
should again become recognized power
in Wall street. He is not yet an old nan
and is much more likely to make his
presence in Wall street felt than he is to
drop into comparative obscurity.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-10-27
White Caps,

Over the cool green wall of waves advancing
Gistens a crested line of feathery foam.
Till along the beach the pillows scatter
glancing
A mist of spray as over the waters comb,
Then fades the uninterrupted crest all slowly
sinking
Where silent, shadowy sands are ever drink
ing, drinking.
Into the sunlIghts CLEAN q gray gull flashes,
Into the salt sea AIR, on buoyant wing.
High above where the prlsoned sea incessant
dashes-
Poises ju I for an instant, wavering
Veers TO the right and then It's vague flight
shifting,
Falls to the waves and with the waves goes
drifting, drifting.
over the sea, miles out, a snip Is riding.
Threading the ocean paths with bounding
keel,
And under her bow the bafIled waves are
Sitting,
As over her spreading sails the breezes steal
While for behind, her foamy wake is lying,
40 northward now she sails, still flying Il wing,
And in my heart and soul voice comes ring
ing
Like CIrce's voice, and saying unto me;
81 am a voice immortal, ever singing
The glory and the sorrow of the sea;
Whose waves like human feet press on for
ever,
Whose soul. like human souls. is happy never,
never" --ErHest .HcGd6eY.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-10-27
ABOUT rHIEvING PATRIOTS.
Curious and Cumbrous Articles Picked
Up on the Line of March.
Eron he Ystn YORK. Sun

From the yelo York Sun.
''Tbere were lots OF funny things about the
war" said Col. Frederick Martin of the
Brooklyn elevated the other day. "now that
you think OF them when the tears are dried
away, and about the funniest things / recall
were the queer articles the boys used to pick
up on the march, and the eccentric way in
winch they'd ,Ote EN- along to finally adOrn
some ditch by the wayside. Strag glers were
the worst at this, but all the fellows were bad
enough. Whenever the army went through
a first family residence the boys would cap
ture v hat strucX each as most attractive, and
some Of their tastes were peculiar. They had
Il great weak ness for cradles. You may ask
me what a.man treading his way to the front
WSnteu with mahogany cradle. ana L m plesC
II know, but they took EN-, First one man
would back cradle and cart it dozen miles;
then he'd begin to cuss and finally dropit.
Now. you'd suppose that any ordinary
idiot would just look at that cradle IS 1t lay
IN the road ana pass on. but they wouldn't
Some one would be certain to pick II up and
lug 1t few miles further into the Confed-
eracy.
II recall one cradle that travelled 100 miles
on blue backs before it went to increase the
blaze OF mess fire. Somehow they seemed
TO thick vaguely that there was a chance of
getting the infant soother home, but they
never succeeded.
The funniest thing ever saw carried was
a looking glass as high as your head and two
feet wide. 1 saw it first in the paror of
Central VirRinisn mansion, and next on a
soldiers back, headed tor Petersburg. Then
lost sight of it for two days, and found it
again propped up against Il tree forty miles
further along. The next day saw It travel
ing tenderly on a straggler's back. He had
his gun in one hand, and had somehow
strapped the glass. so he could get along with
out holding East to it.
well, this fellow must have got tired for
the next day third man had it, and on the
next fourth. This chap toted ii into the
lines at Petersburg. He ret IT up against
tree, took a long, regretfu look at full length
of his shabby self, and turned away with
sigh.
ut was Just as well that he did. The next
minute along came mimic bullet, buzzIng
like hornet, ana hit the glass square in the
centre, and smashed it into frame fall OF
cracks radiating from around the hole.
The heavier and the more useless things
were the more they chung to them, even com
blnlng TO escort pianos into untimely graves
IN m udholes; but the man who could steal a
rocking chair was a white robed AM gel in mis-
own mind, and the object of universal envy.
Another funny thing was to have the suit
Ter strike camp loaded up with condensed
mllk. I've seen whole regiment sitting on
fence. each man with a milk can in one hand
dipping out the sweet, thick stuff with his
forehnger and licking it of with an express
sion OF beatitude that would make a Raphael
lite saint look sick in comparison"
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-10-27
Blaine in Pennsylvania.

The speeches which Mr.. Blaine is max.
ing in Pennsylvania show very clearly
the sort of man be is. They are brilliant
and able, but insincere. He does not hes
itate to make statements which are wide
Of the facts, provided he thinks he can
make point by doing SO. His state
ments respecting the wages of negro
laborers OF the South have been shown to
be untrue, but he, nevertheless, continues
to make them. He makes statements
respecting the tariff which he cannot sup
port by facts. His object is to influence
the workingmen to give their votes to the
Republican party, and he stops at moth
ing to accomplish it.
He seems to fear that workingmen have
found out that they have nothing to hope
for from the Republican party, and,
hence, he is making extraordinary efforts
to prove that that party is the friend of
workingmen. He applauds labor agita-
tiOns and seeks the approval of labor lead.
ers. All this seems strange in view of the
fact that in the last Presidential cam
paign the mlllionaires and mOnopolists
were his supporters. They gave a great
dinner at Delmonico's during the cam
paign and raised large sum of money
for his campaign expenses.
If he is such close friend of those
who are regarded as the oppresscrs of la
Dor how can he consistently play the part
he Is playing in the Pennsylvania cam
paignI There is no doubt that MIR.
Blaine is a candidate for the Presidential
nomination OF his party. II be were not
it is certain that he would not now
be stumping Pennsylvania. Doubt
less there is some fear among the
Republican leaders OF that State that
their ticket will be defeated, but that
is not sufficient to influence him
to take an active part in the cam
paign. He expects to be the nominee of
his party for President, and cannot afford
to have the great Republican State of
Pennsylvania, which gave him 81. 900,
elect Democratic Governor. A victory
OF that kind would make the nomination
for President by the republicans worth
less. Mr.. Blaine has already been a can
in being candidate again il there were
no prospect OF being elected.
An eminent Republican few days ago
said that the only hope there was for civil
| service reform was the return OF the Re-
publican party 10 power, and vet more
than once, in quiet way, Mr.. Blaine, in
his Pennsylvania speeches, has sneered
at the civil service law, and limited that
civil service reform is a humbug.
The country knows that Mr.. Blaine is
demagOgue, but he is such an able m an,
and talks so plauslbly, that he is certain
10 have following as long as he remains
IN public life. IL is extremely doubtful,
however, that he will ever succeed in max
/ ing majority OF tn g people believe that
| he Is a d man to be President.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-10-27

Programme of the Protecuonists.
There are indications that the protec-
tionsts are preparing to make a strong
effort next winter 10 have the tax on
whisky and tobacco abolished. They see
that something must be done to relieve
the overlooking Treasury, and to save the
protective tariff they propose to do away
with the internal revenue taxes.
Representative Kelley, OF Pennsylvania,
who is one OF the leading protectionists OF
the country, in a speech day or TWO ago
said: ''Why not tax cabbages and oats as
well as to compel American citizens 10
pay $40, 900. 600 for the privilege OF smoking
and chewing American-grown tobaccoE"
OF course Judge KELLEY could have
answered his own question satisfactorily
to himself and every body else if he had
desired TO. 1t IS not necessary that
man shall smoke and chew tobacco or
drink whisky, but 1t is necessary that he
shall eat cabbages and oat meal or other
kinds OF food. In other words, the tax on
whisky anG tobacco is tax on luXuries,
while a tax on articles which are the food
of the common people is tax On the
necessarles OF life.
1t is curious that the protectionists
refuse to meet an argument against
repeating the tax on whisky and tobacco
fairly and squarely. They not only insist
that the tax is burden on the tobacco
raisers and whisky producers. but also
that there is just as much justice in tax
ing wheat and meat as in taxing these
articles. As matter OF fact, the burden
of the whisky and tobacco tax does not
fall on the producers, bat the consumers,
and neither Of these articles is necessary
to the health or happiness of anybody,
while food articles, which Judge Kelley
talks about taxing, are necessary to
everybody.
The main argument for reduction of
the tariff is that the articles which the
poor eat and wear and use in the build
ing of their houses should be cheapened
as much as possible. Judge Kelley and
the protectionists, however, think that
whisky and tobacco should be cheap
ened first.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-10-27

There appears 10 be an unusual amount
OF gossip about the recent visit OF the
President aud some mem beers OF his Cabi-
net TO the State Fair at Richmond. A New
Orleans Times Democrat special from
Washington quotes the Critic as saying
that one Of the Cabinet officers declared
that 1t was one OF the worst arranged
affairs that nc ever witnessed. The Cabi-
net officer is reported to have said: "Not
content with keeping our party at the
fair grounds until IT was monot0nous, a
reception committee secured us and very
considerably took US out to a cemetery.
the attraction, we were told, at Richmond,
principally because IL Is tbs last resting
place OF number Of Confederate dead.
Then we were hauled over toe city good
zeal like circus performers or negro min.
strels might DO exhibited, aud finally. To
crown our misery, the train was DELAYED
over an hour that the crowd might shake
hands with the President. II will be a
long time before 20 OF on another south
ern trip, and / think the President ana
myself are Of one mind on this subject"
The Tlmes-DemocrAps special says that
the above remarks are attributed 10 Sec
rotary EnGicott The chances are that
the remarks are not his nor aly other
Cabinet officers. Secretary Lpdlcoti may
have dropped a remsra Ot some BORT, upon
which the Critics yarn IL based. bat even
ihat IL doubtful Tie critic has me repu.
talon u hearing more than ~ sad.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-10-27
A Premature Discussion.

In view of the fact that the next
National Democrats Convention is a
long way OF. it IS rather remarkable that
there should be so much discussion OF the
question wGssher or not Mt. Cleveland
Will be the next Presidential nominee of
the Democratic parry. In nearly every
n2r; Of the country this discussion is
going on, and in some localities the inter-
est shown in it is almost as great as If the
nominating convention were about u as
semble.
There is no doubt that II the convention
were to assemble at any time the present
year Mr. Cleveland would be nominated,
and it is probable, as far as can be judged
from present indications. that be will be
the Democratic candidate, but many
things may occur in the next two years
which will entirely upset present calcu-
lations. Mr. Cleveland has succeeded so
far in giving very general satisfaction,
but who can tell that ne will
continue to do so! A single act Of his
may destroy his chances for a second
term, or some great question may come
before the country which some man, now
not thought of in connection with the
Presidency, will so handle as to make
himself popular tavorite.
MIR. Hewitt will doubtless be elected
Mayor Of New York, and he may so con-
duct himself in that position as to CON-
mand the attention of the entire country
and receive the Presidential nomin alton
OF his party. There is a growing feeling
that the next candidate should be taken
from the South or West, and Mr.. Carlisle
may be selected as the party's next
standard bearer.
If Dir. Cleveland continues TO make
good record the popular demand for his
denomination will be difficult to resist.
That shrewd old Pennsylvania politician,
Simon Cameron, said some time ago that
Dir, Cleveland would be renOminated,
and that it would require every Republi-
can vote to beat him. Mr.. Cameron is
strong believer in Blaine, and when he
says that every Republican vote will be
required to beat Mr.. Cleveland he means
that he regards it very doubtful whether
ne can be beaten at all. The fact that
Mr.. Cleveland's prospects for a renomina-
ton are being so generally discussed is
the best possible evidence that he is now
regarded as the strongest man with the
people In his party.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-10-27

from the Chlcd1O NelcS.
Col. Belo goes back to his Galveston news
paper office sadly disa ppOinted an. He tag
ged the President all around last summer and
put in about six weeks of his valuable time
trying to teach the Executive how to shoot
and fish Once he saw AIr, Cleveland sd ash
ing around in a sylvan lake among the Adj
rOndacks. and shedding his coat and boots he
cried: Have no fear Mr.. President Will
save you9 To this heroic ofrtr Mr.. Cleve-
land replied: "You needn't worry about me /;
my hook out of q stump"
Although the Texas editor made a failure
of this valorOus attempt to save the President
from drowning. he really was of much assist
ance to the Presidential party in the noun
tains. He dug ell he bait, carried the fish,
whistled up the dogs, loaded the guns, pre-
pared thu lunches and did all the chores gen
orally. He had reason, we think, to expect
some handsome recognition Of his services
and we can imagine that his heart beat high
and his face flushed with hope when he cal ed
at the White House on his way back to Gal
weston. He had heard the rumor linking his
distinguished name with the Austrian mis-
sion, and he was pleased to see in the Presi-
dents hand small roll that looked like a
commission.
My dear Belo," SAID President Cleveland.
never shall IL be said OF my administra ton
that it W as blind to the services of its friends
Your fidelity to me this summer has touched
me to the quick and has awakened in NV
bosom the volcanic fires of enthusiastic ap-
probation. i desire, therefore, in apprecia-
ton or your services, to present you with this
unmOuhted cabinet photograph of my new
country house, with my wife and me sitting
on the front etoOp."
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-10-27
The Color Line In Richmond
Firm, Tire E0ltt0sore Sun.


Every one who has ever been in Washing
ton knows Judge Reilly, OF Accomac county.
He 10 typical southern gentleman. aud ia
better known than many politicians. HIS
fsvOrlte resort is ilard's Hotel, and to-day
he discoursed on the cOored question TO an
admiring crowd. Judge Reilly Is thinking of
running for Congress, or at least his name
nas been mentioned a. a candidate by ms
numerous friends
'-ar" he SAD, ''you cannot overstep our
social position by trying 10 force things upon
w which Tor years We nave not tolerated.. A
wei bred virginia negro would not thrust
himself where he WAS not wanted. Why, /
once had slave who afteTWard became q
member Of the Legislature. He once applied
for room at the Exchange Hotel. IL was re-
fused him. lie left, and aid not make fuss
No, rar; the negro 10 virginia knows his
place. II IA this Northern ~ who are trying
TO thrust down our social barriers, but We
vii not permltit. The Inc Of our -Ocic has
been too long drawn In tuis regard - be- swept
away non. Ia regard o. the theatre, why,
tue proprietor rented o. with she understand.
dns That 10 should not be Tuinsd. ~. these 80
come ana iry 90 fOrca 20 ~ accept what they
web No. gar; no ~ from heaven. bell. pur.
gAiiry ~ aew iOTk can MAKE NJ NlTnniHns
break up our social rule. Why, what they
are trBlDg ~ force ns o. 40 ~ greater out.
rye than me nflnR npln ths lnltcI sthtes
naE W ise ggaledcFAt1s."
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-10-27
They Never. Never Do.

FTCUb Ete DctTOt6 FTCo FrSSs.
On one of thc telephone circuits in til c west
ern part of the city, where four subscriber
use the same line, one or them was called IL %
the other day by SECOND on a matter of bust
ness.
You say you paid 81 per yard?" queried
the first.
mo didn't say exactly
But my wife wants TO know. Give me the
exact figures"
II will the first time see you"
But why not now"
because Mrs. l.. who is n the line, is 81
ways listening at her telephone TO hear what
the rest Of us say, and my wife doesn't want
her To know"
"Oh, that's It. | thought You might be
afraid of Mrs. B. That's one of her tricks.
too, though guess both OF em are away to-
day. Good-by."
Hold on thereP' called voice AS he trum
pets were about to be lowered. II am Mrs,
L., ana 1 want to tell both of you men that
you state deliberate falsehood when you saw
listen! You are no gentlemen, and my hus-
band shall make you apologisew
And hold on some mOre!' called a second
voice. II am Mrs. b., and any one who says
listen 70 other peoples talk has got 20 prove
II in court! Make mp your minds TO hear
from mow
Four trumpets were carefully lowered from
four care and hung up on four telephone
boxes. and deep Silence brooded DER the land.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-10-27
Fine Dress Goods

DIAGOSALs can be shown in all the fash.
ionable colors-Seal, Brown, Navy Blue, Gar
net, Sapphire ana Myrtle. Care has been taken
to secure trimmings, both IN Valours and
Buttons, TO match
RHADAMAS.-An all Wool suitipr finn.
seasons importation, in all colors. ehqve
both Striped and Plain Vevets to harmonic:
small and large buttons to suit.
HAVANA CLOTH.-Medium weight fab.
ric for immediate use in all the new shades,
corresponding colors in novelty Striped Otto.
man Silk or Velvets for trimming; buttons
for same,
MARrELS.-Au Silk and Wool Mixtures
Flake effects, eight different styles. These
goods look best when made without trim.
ming, being handsome in themselves.
CASHMERES.-Ever fashionable goods. "a
inches wide; Seal, Navy Blue. Garnet, AL
gerie and Myrtle. These Cashm eres ver
bought much below their real value, and We
are offering same at astonishingly low prices
TRICOTS.-All Wool. steam finish, We
have these goods in four different qualities
and widths, SO inches, 80, 50 and 81 inches;
especially adapted for tailor MADE costumes
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-10-27
INDEI FONRW ADVERTISEMENTS.

MEETISGs-w orkingmen's Union Assocla-
ton; Savannah Lodge No. 800. 1. o. of q. T.;
oglethorpe Light Infantry; Golden Ruls
Lodge No. 1s. l. o. o. +.
q SPECIAL NoTIcEs-Notice, Mary Wakefield;
AS to crew Of Br. Steamships Boston City and
Sylvia: A Young Man Wanted.
LEGAL NoTICE-Application Of Incorpora-
hon OF Savannah Investment Company.
ANUsEMENTs-Mi Michael Strogof al the The
atre.
PRoPosALs-For offal from City Stables; for
Tubing and Boring well in Ihomasyille.
CHEAP COLUMN ADvERTIsEMESTs-Hel
Wanted; Employment Wanted; For Rent;
FOR Sale; Lost; Miscellaneous.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-10-27

7 T'7I VIC y. Y SUI I4NI =
No. no, Father Abram, care coming one
hundred thousand strong, ard with several
more thousands to carry, but It's not to
save the city from ruin. It's to elect the
Democratic candidate and give the city
another good Mayor. There is no need OF be-
Ing afraid that one smart sODhist, supported
0Y hundre Is of true but mlstakeG men, is
going TO ruin anything. Let the amateur
anarchists, the sham Socialists have all the
feel very unhappy soon after the poll clerks
get through work on Tuesday, the second day
Of November next