Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-02-28

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SPHIkGFIElO PUBLISHING CO.,
SPRINGFIELD. o.
Telephone No. 80
SUNDAY MORNING. FEsRUlRY 2s. 1885.
Between the FRYING Fan Electric and the
fire journalistic. Garland is having hot and
sizzling life Of il.
Washington was a great man and the
Father Of his Country We admit it, We
admit it.-SPrngtield. Ohio, Feb ~, 1856.
A recent critic remarks that il i no longer
literary to write bad hand or wear long
hair. Literature Stems 10 be growing easier
than ii used TO be
Evangelist Jones was also reared in the
vicinity Of = tohacco-patch. and not only
smokes but ChewS." Timcs-Star-W
why shouldn't he smoke. if he chewS. too"
Shakespeare is believed to have been a
considerable writer. Yet there are but five
words Of his writing eNtant-tho name
william Shakespeare scrawled five times bv
his hand.
When the telephunny catchword Hello is
shouted toward this administration. the
final vowel comes back q, and then the
first syllable slap> down the echo with A
vicious whack.
Senator Edmunds i sometimes spoken
Of by the profane and ribald press-gang at
Washington as Old Cold-Tea Edmunds
The meaning Of this ire, errnt title is in
the application of IT,
Edmunds and Thurman were enemies in
solids. but in fluids friends. They were
tine old couple of not very warm t-totalerS
- they were cOld-tea-totalers. in fact-hut
they were warm friends.
the FlOridian Jones wants to make him
self and the Detroit maiden one. But the
maiden will have TO be won herself first.
And Jones is too utterly too to he. a. tie
MarchiOneSS would say, "A One-er''
The New-York Star has been iuy.sti-
eating the statements of the New-York
World, and publishes proof that the World
is liar. Most men fnd that the world is,
liar before they are as old as Joseph Pu-
liter
Boys. let General Sherman alone. The
old hero has got angry on his own proyocs-
ton, and he wants TO kick somebody Tor il
Let him have little time TO cool of. and
he will go off by himself and kick the right
person.
The Philadelphia Bulletin refers to DR. .
Iaimage a. that universal person Now. .
what is a universal person." Surely. the
Bulletin has not fallen into miSprint for
unirsrSdliSt person. Talmage believes in /
sheol and he-aU too.
Well, now that we have worried pretty
nearly through this awful winter. here
comes up the old scare about cholera for
the summer. We are never comfortable
when we are safe, and never safe when
We are comfortable
"A grammarian would no doubt define
Adams original position as first person.
singular. lPitsbuTg ChronicIc-That
is the reason that Eve, when she came. was
second person. objective. and the SERPENT
passed Adam and parsed her.
Who can blame the heather Chinee FOR
making ii rather hot for the Christian mis-
sionaries among them from America They
naturally think that 4 religion which can
not protect Cinnamon from massacre in
America has no call 10 teach civilization in
Asia.
When Cannon discharged himself from
railroad train he broke his nose. Then the
court took him with his smashed nose and
put him under bond of S45. 900 for his sp-
pearance. When his wives looked at his
hattened nasal organ, they were shocked At
the enormous price put upon his appear
anee.
The SuHduysch"oI Magazine. a Mrtho-
dist publication of Nashville, Tennessee,
had An advertisement of L ncls Toms Cab
in" in its December number: and in the
January issue there was AN apology tor il
and promise that it should not appear
still believe in a Shareholders heaven
Scientists are hopeful that the means Of
seeing by electricity will soon be discovered.
And David Dudley Field recently expressed
il as his opinion that electricity will be found
10 be the principle of life. and that the dav
is not distant when it will he 50 understood
in its nature that it will be ayailed Of Tor
prolOnging existence and keeping the vital
spark aglow in the body forever.
A weIl-known society lady of Wheeling
gave her poodle dog-p the other night .
and invited all the dogs Of her set. The
dogs attended. accompanied by the ladir, ,
and gentlemen belonging to them. and the ,
party broke up with multimdinouS dog I
fight in the parlor. 1t was intended to be- '
the dog-h"nest thing of the season. but il {
turned out t" be- the dog-awfulest. &
The indianapolis News states it a. AN act
ual fact and naturally chafr> at it. that /
cows are permitted to roam at large in that ]
great city, distributing filth over sidewalks i
and streets, and generally giving om thor I
oughfares the appearance OF country .
lanes" This III compact city of over A r
hundred thousand inhabitants, Is not the !
News joking about this cowyar,llv munich t
pality?
Some writer has remarked that Lew Wal ,
aces Ben Hur' has done more 10 strength -,
IN the Christian faith than any other book
VI modern times. ON the contrary. its