Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1886-09-12
f OLD SETTLER.
ALARMED BY INDISCRETI0N WITH AN
UMBRELLA.
Little Peleg Brings Home Hard Luek, but Starts a
Lively ~StGry-Ths Silver Arrow, the
Sacred Deer SlambO and the
Prophet
Ed Mott in Nelr York Sun.

Ed Mott in NeW York Sun.
"Jeewhizz, Peleg!" exclaimed the Old
Settler, in evident alarm. Don't yenever
do that! Wy sonny, that's the mex thing
to bein' ez onlucky ez killing a white deer!
Put it down, We young varmint! That
boy'Il be the death O. me, yit! He will,
b'gosh"
The Old Settler had entered the kitchen
and found little Peleg, his lively ten-year-
old grandson, parading around the room
with the ancient family umbrella raised
over his head. Peleg took it down and
closed it.
"Percrastynation'. Peleg, amt jist the
thing to humor q boy O. your size in, siad
the Old Settler, solemnly; cause We
shouldn't never put off till arter while any
thing We kin do ez slick ez q greaser to
wunst. But bein' ez I've got a pipeful or
so left Ile humor We iist this wunst, but
l don't want We to take it ez a precedent.
So if yell cross yer breast th't We wun't
run off with Bill Simmons ez soon ez | tell
We this story, leavin' poor OF gran'pOp to
totter over to the grocery arter the t'back-
er hisself. an mebbe fetch on a rippin' an
tearin rassil with the army, I'll give in to
We an give we the story in advance"
"Ye mustn't never hist an umberel over
We wen yer in the house, We peSky crh!'
said Peleg's grandfather, sternly. Its
the wust kind o. luck. / knOw'd a boy,
wunst, ez riz an umberel in the house, an
two days arterw'ds he was took with
hookin' cough, an the hoOkin' cough run
inter the measles, an jist a week from the
day he riz the umberel he were deader'n n
frOst-bit tOmater plant. Iuv civ me such
ashOck th't | hain't got the strength to git
over to the grocery arterth five-cent paper
o. smOkin' t'backer | were gOin' arter, an
I'll be Obleeged to asst you to Il an get 1t
fur me. Go git me tn t'backer, Peleg, an
I'll tell We an Injin story. That's a good
boy"
viii you tell me the story first, grand
pop"
Little Peleg crossed his breast three
times, and said that, honestly and truly,
he'd go after his %grandpop's tobacco. So
the Old Settler showed his spectacles up on
his forehead and began his story.
"Yuv often heerd mt speak O. White
Deer Pond, Peleg, an O the many an
many a slOShin' OF buck I've put a quiet
ness IN around an about it. Wull, I'm
gointer ter tell you how that pond got its
name. bein' minded of the circumstances
by yer onfort'nit raisin' o that umbercl in
the house, witch | toll We were nigh ontcr
ez onlucky ez KILN a white deer. Hope
that nothin'll come on it, but I'mtOrtur'd
with p%ermOnit'ry sumptOmsth't sumplin'n
happen.
Longer ago thin | kin recOmember,
long ez my mem'ay is, Pike county were
settled by %Iniins. They nj'yed thcirSelfS
by huntin' an tishin, an titin', an indul-
ged a leetle in aggercult'ral pursuits,
which was the raisin' of a tritle o. corn an
a considerable o. hair. The crop O. hair
they riz was bigger arter the white folks
gun to chop an pry out clearin's around
in the country thin it were afore. Up
around this pond I'm tcllin' we bout tn
was Il p'tic'larly noble tribe of Injins
residin'. s'spose their pedigree run clean
back inter NOah's ark, from all counts.
They was way up above t'other tribes, an
was ruthcr p'tic'lar who they ISOLATED
with. None O their young ones was
lowed to go upan' play ball an jackstuns
with the young uns o the tribe mex door,
an the way the young gals an fellers O.
this noble tribe usety toy theirselfs out was
the talk O. the rest O the community.
Their ClOthin' bills must q ben sumpin'
tremenius. The gals o the ordinary tribes
uStey think they were putin on airs wen
they went out of a Sunday if they wore
their heads O. hair an a pair O. mOc'sins,
an the young fellerS was feelin' way upin
'Sciety il they had four stripes O red paint
on their noses in addition to their ev'ry
day clothes, witch was an eagle feather on
their tOpknots. But the young folks O. the
boss tribe! Jecwhizz, Peleg! the style
they slung on! Wen the gals ven out for
strool on n Sunday AFTERNOON, or wus
dressed fur a Fourth o. July or some ice
cream fest valthey never thought O. putin
on less'n three strings O. beads, sides
wearin' their mOc'Sins an hair; an ez fur
the ~tellerS, they had stripes O. red an val
Ter paint all over their faces, an eagle
feathers enough on their heads to fill 4 bed
tick. Wy the wardrobe O. some O. them
stuck'up Iniin gals want half complete
'thOut it had two pairs o moc'Sins an 4
quart o beads in ii, an I've heered th'tth'
was some o. the young bucks th't couldn't
think O. dresSin' on leSs'na kag o. paint
an two eagles 4 month. Proud an 'stra-
VACANT people, war they, Peleg! But whar
ar they now, sonny? Go asst the winds
that rips and rOarS, an inquire of the hills
an rocks th't frOwnS an towers. Go asst
'em, and if they tell We, come let me know,
an III qe Oblceged to We. will, 'bgosh!
"Winky-ha-i ibby-goslambo-gash were
tire name Of the chief of this bang-up
people. That means in English, Skeert-at-
nOthin'- lessn-a-swamp-tull- o'-painters. His
wife called him SlambO fur short, and we'll
call him that ez we perCced with the history
He had q darter, | spect th't Rippy-rap-
Ketinko ware the pootiest piece o copper
cOlOred caliker th't ever chawed ven'zen.
Though she were the darter of a king she
done all the homework O. the family, an
that's wy they called her Rippy-rap-
KcntikO, which means in our language, En-
useful in-thc-ta m'ly-ez-a-fine-tOOth comb.
The kinghad a prophet. Besides prophetin'
he were the family doctor, and usety also
do 4 few slick tricks with cards, an iuggle
pennies an shillin' hiedes up his sleeve for
the big chief amusement. He was uglier
then the front end of rhinocerhoss. They
called him acknowledgements, or
keer-the-man-in-the-m with
One-hoOp. He were a terror, but the King
were stuck on him. The leadin' young
buck o the tribe were n risin' youth by the
name O. Observation-Disclosures. The
ganahe Travelled with called him Nocky-fop
but in English his named be Chaw-the-
head observation-disclosures -call-it-fun.
IF We were a little older, sonny, tn
wouldn't be no he need O me tellin' we th't
NOcky-fiap were dead an gone on Sambo-
gash's charming darter, Rippy-rap-Ketin-
ko. He loved her wuss'n a bar loves
honey, an she swooped her love for his'n,