Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1886-08-14
LEONE LOCAL CHAT.

pair OF starry eyed lovers intent upon
the usual astronomical observation at
the front gate. They Immediately
gave the alarm, and the police at once
began to clear the way of small fry,
hogs, and billy goats, in order to be
ready for any emergency, and to have
clear space to run away in. The
Mayor without delay called meet
ing of the Council where resolutions
were passed condemning such astron-
omical visitors as carpet baggers and
ordering out Thy way-of-precautionl
the Fire Company, the Sweet Pickles,
the Personal Beauties, and all assist
ants; the p. M. had already secured
the Zouaves, divided the force, and
stationed them around the Statesman
office and the Post Office. They were
not very well armed, he depended up
on their uniforms soaring away any
Visitation of Providence. THE HER
AID force was upon Scheu's roof con-
sulting the telescope; and everybody
was on the ragged edge of curiosity,
when a small boy of the philosopher
species who carries his hands in his
trouser pockets, said i" reckon that
there's Bill's kite wot he tied a lantern
to-" Funny, wasn't it, how everybody
" thought it was something of that
sort?" and scurried away to prove an
elsewhere.
Thecaptain of the Personal Beauties
was kindly informed the other day,
that his nine needed some aeao players.
I" Ne,c players! why you can't find
any neacer players in the State than
mine. The great trouble is they are
too ne,c.n
Do we need a Bergh here in the
interests of humanity. Somebody told
me clothing merchant carried twin
infants down street just tucked up
under his arms in an unbecoming and
heartless manner; the authorities
ought to look into the matter.
The forthcoming BUSINESS edition
of THE HERALD is growing beyond
all expectations. The business men
of the city are promptly filling in their
advertisements. and they tell story
that will agreeably surprise the trade
craft of the North and West who
think we have been standing still.
Cuts of our prominent men, public
buildings, churches, handsome private
residences, would help to make it
handsome, interesting and valuable,
at home and abroad. 1t is the first
enterprise of the kind yet attempted
in this city and its worth simply as
an advertising medium, cannot be
estimated. 1t is a we'll known fact
that land agents in every city, get up
the illustrated editions at an enor-
nous personal expense, aud say that
they can well afford to do so in the
returns of business it brings them. l
am not not in the habit of saying nice
things of THE HERALD, but it is graf
flying to see the appreciation and in
terest given it by the public in this
new enterprise.
The Teachers Institute has been
interesting, and we'll attended a full
report of it will be found in another
column.
What has become of the Fair pro-
ject, or the projected Fair?
If the worst comes to the worst, the
three mines might be induced to give
three days. entertainment. The
evolution of mind and matter that
evolved the Picked Beauties, the
Fire Cracker, Frank trial, etc., oughn't
to stop evolving yet.
There is a crazy man in Buffalo
who imagines he is an umpire. lex.
The Martinsburg boys imagine the
umpire of their defeats, crazy man.
It's a poor rule that won't work both
ways.
The concert given by the M. G.
Band Tuesday evening was extra
good.
The friends of Mr.. III. A. Riddle,
formerly of this city, will be glad to
learn of his promotion to the position
of Gen. Passenger Agt. on the Cum
berland Valley r. r.
Mr.. d. S. Eichelberger, Senior, is
seriously ill at his home in this city.
Lieut.. C. Lyeth is a guest at the
residence of his father, Mr.. S. Lyeth,
East Martin st.
Mr.. and Mrs. Jas. Parker, of New
Richmond, Ohio, are visiting their
daughter, Mrs. d. III. Stuckey.
Mrs. Mary Hedges of Moorefield is
visiting her father, Mr.. d. S. Eichel-
berger.
Mr.. Fred. Spillman, of Wheeling,
is guest at the residence of his faith
err, on West King st.
Mrs. Martha Etter, of Georgia, and
two daughters, Miss Amy and Ida
Etter, of the Hagerstown Female
Seminary; and Miss Matte Kyner,
Pleasant Plain, who is attending the
Teachers Institute, are guests at MI.
John M. Martins.
Miss Brent Smith has returned
home after pleasant visit to Mary
land, bringing with her pleasant
young lady of Mercersburg, Penn.
Harry Homrich was in town this
week.