Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-12-06
BRIGHT BITS.

HE-f could live on pigs feet all the time.
She-Are you sure you DON'T 7e1dS SUt-
tn0S.
WHAT l want" cried an impetuOus
woman. struggling to reach ribbon counter
in a crowded store yesterday, what l want
IS free trade p'-BoSton HeyGld.
so you are 10 years old. are you. Jenny?'
"l es; and now realize that it ia an I'M
lucky number. It's too old for dolls. and pa
says It's not old enough for gentlemen's So
c1ety."-1ecds SiftinJs.
STEALING ten dollar horse cost Colorado
m an his life, although ne had been tried and
acquitted five times for murder What q
pity horse stealing was not his first crime
Shoe and Leather Reporter.
"WHEN New Workers." says a writer, "be-
come TOO scientific and literary, they are APP
10 become. at the same time, too irreligioue.'
At this distance it looks as If the New Workers
were becoming too scientific and literary
V0TriStOGoR Herald.
CITIZEN--I see that Cleveland has bounced
McSnorts for making campaign speech.
Poitlcan-He has, has he? Well L call
that darned outrage.
Citizen-I don't. | heard the speech and
wasn't where I could kill him very handIly,
myself.-L0aosU Citissn.
A TEACHER in a San Francisco public school
was informed by lawyer at O'clock p. m.
that she was heir to $4,000. He expected to
hear her whoop, and to see her grab her bon
net and run, but instead of that she calmly
replied: II will hear the class in geography
lick three boys, and be at your o1tce in an
hour.
SHE wasn't very young but she had money.
He didn't want the earth. dearest" he
began, but she stopped him.
II anticipate what you are about to say,
Mr.. Sampson" she SAID land | would spare
your feelings, for 1t can never, never be. /
esteem you highly, and viii be a sister to"
81 have four sisters Already" he replied, bit
terly. flour grown sisters, and life is a hid
eous burden. Dut. o Clara" he went on pas
sIonately, 'If you cannot be my wife will you
not give me a mothers protecting love? Pm
an orphan ."-Lf[e.
BEFORE Willie KS cousin Bertha arrived
at his home with her parents on a summer
visit his mother had told him to observe how
graceful and polite her manners were, es-
pecially y at table. When she came Willie OBJ
served her. therefore, with admiring interest.
One day his mother said: do you see how
nicely Bertha conducts herself, Willie"
"Tes, mamma"
Don't you think her manners are rather
better than yours" n
Yes, mamma; and guess know why"
"Why is It, my dearn'
"Probably Bertha has been better brought
up than haveH'- Youths Companion.
THE church fair soon will blossom
In every country town,
And Maud behind the counter
VIII sit in slken gown.
And sell you red pin cushions,
Ana shaving cases, 100.
And empty claret bottles
Trimmed up with ribbons blue.
She'll charm you with her tender
Smile and fairy laugh,
And sell you for ten dollars some
pretty little frivoity of trim
ket that she made with her own
sweet hands at home at an act
ual outlay of
One dollar and half. Puck.
"DID father injure your feelings last night
when he asked you out into the hall ?' said q
fair damsel of g street to clerk in o Seventh
street dry goods store.
Eyes, he replied in bitter, revengeful tones,
'but | can forgive him that for your sake,
dear"
"rhen you will come again % she asked,
hopefully and brightly.
"Yes, love. will come again"
''When, Harry, when ?''
when your pa is In the cold, cold ground.
Annie "
mo sooner than that ?" she asked. with
tears in her eyes.
"Well," he said. forgivingly, 'for your sake
l might be induced TO come to his funeral."-
Wdshtngton Critic.