The Arizona sentinel., 1886-09-25
NOSES REMODELED.
A Berlin Surgeon Who Repairs and K
 makes Noses of Every Description.

makes Noses of Every Description.
 There are some people in this world
 who should carry their noses in a scab-
 bard, if for no other reason than to hide
 them from the public gaze. New
 Orleans is full of such people. Many
 of them have knotty, lumpy, flat,
 twisted and curly noses, which are a
 positive humiliation to the owners and
 a source of much modification to the rest of mankind. But the ugly nosed men and women need no longer suffer. The hour of their deliverance from un- gainly peaks has come, and if they do not haul out the artillery and fire a I salute it is their own fault.
 A Berlin surgeon has discovered the art of repairing and remodeling noses of all sizes and ages. He can take a nose shaped like an artichoke and by his peculiar method turn it into beauti- ful and really classic snout. He bars nothing. The fact of the matter is he invites the hideous and pays premium for it. The man with nose twisted like gourd handle or a rams horn is his pleasure. The man with no nose at all is his delight and joy.
 This Berlin surgeon, when he gets hold of bad nose, puts chloroform un- der it and then grasps it with pair of bone forceps and smashes, cuts and knocks it into pulp, and then he goes quietly to work, and, with the nasal bone for a foundation, builds a nose that makes the gods weep with envy, and which is real luxury to wipe and to blow.
 This discovery is going to be bless ing to the human race, for the reason that he is willing to impart to his broth CT professionals the knowledge he has gained concerning noses, and to make them the beneficiaries of his art. This generosity on his part leads us to be- ieve that good deal of ugliness now existing in the human family will be de- stroyed. For instance, the society girl with a pug nose tilted up at the end, and which causes her to look as if she were constantly smelling boneyard or a garbage barrel, can have it trans formed into proboscis as delicate and as captivating as that worn by the hand some girl whose likeness is imprinted on our silver dollar. The person with a short nose can have it properly and artistically elongated; the long nose can be iudiciously curtailed, and the fat and warty nose treated in such a manner as to make it appear thin and muscular.
 The greatest benettto be derived from the discovery, however, is the fact that it will make the men of to-day braver and readier than they are to battle for their personal rights, for the reason that if they get into fight and their noses are mashed, they can go off and put them in dock and have them repaired at small cost. A broken nose will not amount to much more than broken walking-stick, and the dudes careful of their good looks will be happy.
 It is the one ambition of the Berlin surgeons life to secupe the job of put ting decent nose on the Duke of Cum berland. The Duke, was born without a nose, and a scrub doctor, who pre- tended to know all about such things, made him a nasal organ out of flesh cut from his aristocratic arm. Unfor- tunately, however, for the Duke, his nose looks like a huge red tumor, which wabbles from one side to the oth- CT when he walks, and trembles and oscillates in the wind as if it were a clump of jelly. The Berlin nose-maker says that he can remove the one-horse affair from the face of the Duke and build him a royal smeller that will stand up against a forty-mile gale as stiff as the bowsprit of Dutch iron clad. He will guarantee it not to flop, shake or to become loose in its fasten- ings, and, therefore, we advise the Duke to take advantage of the oppor- tunity and get beak with some back, bone to it.-N c. States.