Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-03-18
Ar THE PosT.oFFIcE.
Some of the Trials and Tribulations Of
the Retail Stamp Clerk.

family said retail stamp clerk at
the post-office, ''muSt be very small.
Why, there is not one person in five
hundred who has gumption enough to
put a stamp on letter. l see the pro-
cess gone through with about a thou
sand times day, and 1 ought to know.
All the people at my window begin by
putting the stamps into their mouths,
closing their mouths, rolling their eyes
like man trying to swallow a pill
and moving the stamps around in their
mouths until they are perfectly sat
urated with saliva. Then they lay
them on the corner of their envelopes
and bring their clenched fists down on
them like a pile-driver. Then comes
the profanity. See here, clerk they
say, this stamp is no account. Won't
you please put little mucilage on it.
So strange that they can't put enough
mucilage on the stamps to make them
stick Now, the trouble is that these
people lick and chew all the gum off
the stamp before they try to affix it;
and if the gum were an inch thick. it
would meet with the same fate. The
way to put a stamp on is to moisten
the gum very slightly. and thQ
lay it on the envelope, and with the
end of the foretinger slip it back and
forwards once or twice until the saliva
and the gum are mixed. have been
licking stamps for forty years, but l
have never vet met with one which
would not adhere, if it was treated in
this way. Another thing people like
to kick about is the refusal of the clerks
to take torn notes and great piles of
nickels and pennies in payment for
stamps"
'.Are they not bound to take them9'
Not much. The Government has a
treasury for the redemption of mutt
lated currency. and there is no more
sense in expecting the post-otiice to re-
deem it tlan in expecting the paymaS-
ter of the navy in doing so. If it was
once understood that we would take
torn bills, we should have no other
money to handle and nothing else to
DO. We would embark in the banking
business, and somebody else would
have to be hired to attend to the post
Ds1icc. Then, us to nickels. three-cent
pieces and pennies, the post-oifice reg
ulations expressly provide that we are
not bound to take over twenty-five
cents worth from one person. But
they keep bringing them to use in
large quantities, sometimes rolled up
in paper and sometimes slung in an old
handkerchief. 1t is al in vain, how
ever. Then, how they do kick against
telling what is in their package and
against directing them before they are
weighed
whats the use of that?'
"Why, all the use in the world. II
we didn 'teXercise any supervision over
what was put into the mails, every bag
full of mail that left here would be
sOiled with nasty ointment or hair oil,
even if the post-otlice were not blown
up with some explosive. Now, We do
not require people to tell us exactly
what they have got in their parcels.
but only its general character, such as
dry goods, leather, wearing apparel
and SO on, but they stick like blazes
even against that. Then, as to ad-
dressing their letters and parcels be-
fore they bring them to us to be
weighed, that also is indispensable. in
order to avoid giving misleading infor-
nation. We sometimes weigh some
thing in an unsealed envelope, and
tell the postage, on the theory that it
is unsealed. Then the man goes off,
puts that amount of postage on it, and
seals it, thereby doubling the rate. The
consequences is that his letter is re-
turned to him for want of sufficient
postage. Then he goes to the pOstmast-
er and bowls; and swears that he put
exactly the amount of postage on the
letter that we told him to put on it.
Again, we weigh a parcel of merchan-
disc that is not directed. and sell the
man the stamps forit. We ask where it is
going, but the man is sullen and makes
some answer that we do not catch. We
take it for granted it is going to some
place in the United States. But he
goes off and directs it to Belgium. 1t
gets stopped and returned to him of
course, as no merchandise can be sent
by mail to any place outside of the
United States. Then the man goes to
the postmaster and bowls, and says
that we expressly told him that the
parcel could go to Belgium. See?
Have you seen the Annual Postal
Guide for 1886. just out? 1t announces
some rather interesting changes in post
al rates"
what are they?"
Zone relates to photographs. You
would'be surprised if you knew what a
large percentage of the mail matter
weighed by us is photographs. Here
tofore q strange anomaly has existed
in the rostage on them. We have been
charging a cent an ounce for them
when sent to any place in this country,
and only a cent for every two ounces
when sent abroad; that is to say, it
cost two cents to send two ounces of
photographs, unsealed to the West side
of the city, and one cent to send the
same package to Turkey. India and
Arab;a. Now, however. photographs
are ruled by the department to be
printed matter. and they go. when un-
sealed, all over the civilized world,
nearly at tho rate Of two OunceS or q