The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1886-02-24
ROASTING A POLITICIAN.
B. r. TILMAN's LETTERS ARE DISCUSSED
IN A QUAINT WAY.

B. R. TILMAN's LETTERS ARE DISCUSSED
IN A QUAINT WAY.
Mrs. Bigwater Enlightens Her Hus-
band on the Statesman's Move
mcnts.
Editor Press and Banner:
AS 1 was sitting quietly last Friday night
at my house. think Ing Of our farm and my
old horse Jim who is got the distemper, my
old woman all Of q sudden says TO me In a
Sal Parks > a writin 70 the Press and Banner
This Sorter took me unbeknowin like to
RRyssifa RSyoS.a ""s''' old "0""n'" says u don't
"You never knows anything what's goin'
on in the world, Mr. BiSwater,' says my old
woman, "becanse you never read the papers"
SO she says, Mr.. Bgwater 1 am no scholar
with the pen, but wants sou to write to this
here paper for me and tell the Editor that
This here Sal Parks and her old man Is mighty
smart and sorregt, but they don't know WAL AL
is this p. r.. Tilman p Yes, that's what she
asks. Her John could have found morc'n he
did by locking little further"
"Now, Mr.. Bigwater.' Says she, "don'r you
dispute me when tells you that this here Mr.
me and shake your bead that way, cause l
know what knows" When my old woman
talks like that she means business and l
dassent dispute her word. So she goes on to
say, "Iou knows he Is got the dyspepSy as
we'll as me. and If you would read what he
says about the farmer, you woulo say as
says too. This dyspepsy makes him sorter
kinder nervous and keeps him restless like,
you know, and mad with every body, and
hisSelf too. He has the political Jim jams
says she, drought on by this dyspepsy and
disappointment. l knows how these things
is'' says she. "He keeps on working up him
self till he thinks he knows more about farm.
ing than you, Mr.. Bigwater, and that General
McGowan, Gov. Thompson, NJ. G: Butler.
Wade Hampton and the rest OF our big farm.
ers is nowhere and don't know as much about
farming as you do. Who's been and imposed
on us farmers? Who had this blamed priori-
ty of liens law pasSed?"
When my old woman said this she jumped
up and tore the paper In two and she was
down little, she says, Yes, I Says, who's
done it? Nobody IS imposing on the farmer
but the farmer himself The farmers passed
this law Now this same Tilnan, as l says,
has the political jim, jams and wants office
and You know he does Mr.. Bigwater, and
don't you deny 1t. He thinks he will fool the
farmers BY all this here big blowing, but us
long as lives, lie shan't fool you MIR. Big
water. No. says she, 1.-THE women farmers
must not let their husbands BIZ made fools OF,
to put no man in office. The men for politi-
cal office must be men who ain't got the dys-
pepsy and they must be men who do not try
to fool anybody with all this writing about
nothing and 4 agricultural College, and IL
whOupiDg himself up all the time. This is
what Sal Parks old Man should have told
her.
what docs this here Tllman expect to do
when he gets in office That's wha I want
to know. Yes, can tell you what he wants
to do then. Why he wants To do like the rest
OF them when they gets II big office. He
"A
draw his pay and set up Il agricultural Col
lege al! to be paid for out of our tax money.
Ies, SIR says she, put this man In office,
Mr. Blgwater, anu as long as he remains there
organizing and imposing on, and we will have
to pay the same taxes as we pay now. This
is fact, MI BlgWater, and you sit there and
look just like you did not believe u word L
say. I'll bet Il dollar this here Tilman don't
make u living on his farm and this Stlrs up
his liver like and sets his pen agoing."
Says she again, "Mr. Bywarer, | says our
farmers are no Moses in the bull rushes and
they ain't no such fools as some people like
MIR. Tilman thinks they is
"Mr. Bigwater." says she, 81 want you to
answer me some 6 questions ana put them M
got her M dander ie up, S so says, @ ~ will vii if CAM.
Then answer me this. Where does MIR,
Tilman want To live?"
Says !, "At home old woman"
Says she, "Mr. Blgwater are you crazy? AZ
ter all have said can't you see he wants to
live in Columbia, in the new State house or
somewhere near there? Now, Mr.. Bigwater,
what does he want to dc there?'
"Well," says !, sOrter timid like, "he wants
to farm there"
office! office !! office! -! Office 20 she
says, louder'n a. church bell with her mouth
up agin my car, and The says on, "Alr. Blgwa-
ter, you are the biggest old tool ever see.'
This sorter upset me as it come on all unbe-
KNOWN like to me, So lsays, "old woman how
is he going to get there?'
"How?' says she, why by all that writing
he is IL doing about the farmer and a agricul-
tural College. Can't you see that?"
Well you See thought he would go there
and get his office on the ears and not in the
newspapers, tut my old woman knows.
"Mr: Bigwater." says she when he gets Of
flee what Will he do? ~
Have nobody but farmers in Office" says !,
"and have no taxes collected and have agr-
cultural College free for us turner's"
Says she, "Did anybody ever see such old
fool us you, Mr.. Bigwater? AS says to you
before, he will forget all about the farmer, the
agricultural College and taxes. lie will draw
his pay. have good time and put lawyers
and doctors and such like folks in Office"
Then she goes on talking quiet like and not
noticing me. "This man is sure to fool these
here thick skull men farmers If IL wasn't for
the women folks. He won't DO anyhow, and
4 intend TO raise my voice from the bullrushes
against him. Vanity will kill him yet. lie
thinks he ought TO he president Of this whole
country and the only way he sees to get there
or anFWncre ciSc, Is 10 play upon Inc creuull-
ty of the farmers. That's it, and knows it,
Thinks to myself, well my old woman is
right and l will dr0p.thiS man. After sorter
eliminating like to herself for q while and Il
working of her lips like. size goes on in the
same way. "The reason the men farmers don't
know any more'n they do, is because they
don't read the papers. Sal Parks is smart
one and she had to read to her old man Fabout
This here Tilman atole he got reused up like.
The Lord knows what would become Of Mr..
Blgwi,ter If it wasn't for me TO warn him
against these conniving politicians and such
like men. No, sir they Shan't fool Mr.. Big
water. No, sir, Sanlanthy Bigwatrr Is no fool
if she is Il woman and The wife of Il farmer.
Yes, there are good many b. II. Tilmans
right here at home and says she, II hope Sal
and her Old man will ask what they are and
what they want"
"Mr. Bigwater," says she. aloud. "now you
write this down, don't make Il fool of your
self for any man living anu especially for one
who thinks everything rotten and wrong but
himself"
With this she goes on into the Kitchen like
she had got rid OF a great load and 1 went out
to see how old jim and his dlStcnpcr was get
ting on II. BIGWATER.
Facts about Pneumonia.