The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-06-10
SILENCE JORDAN'S FATE.
A FAIRY STORY OF CINCINNATI
LIFE IN THE SPRING OF '49.

n FAIRY 81 oRS OF -SiiNS''>'NN'a
LIFE IN THE SPRING OF '49.
How Desperate Terrorized the worthy
Citizens of Porkopolis-A Bad Party
and No Mistake-The Little Drummer
from the East-Nemesis.
"Why, bless your heart" the coloheA
went on to say, II have seen thirty stal-
wart men engaged in conversation Oh
matters of public import, and, would you
believe it? although the subject under ols-
cussion was pursued for eighteen hours,
not man in the crowd dared utter word
but Silence Jordon! The way he terror
lied the worthy citizens OF this good city
was something marvellous beyond COM
pare. He would enter the most palatlal
residence in town, and, after kicking the
elegant and costly chandeliers to pieces,
he would compel the inmates of the house
to prepare him the most elaborate meal
that money and industry could devise.
Then he would kick the top OF all the
pianos in the house, and lie down ID the d.
lapidated instruments for an after-dlnner
nap with his boots on. When he walked
4
the tracks and travel on the opposite side
Of the street selected by him for q prone
made.
:; .aaHe was bad party, and no mistake.
But what l started to tell you was this:
An, notwithstanding young fellow en-
.ployed as a travelling salesman for an east
ern house reached town one day. He met
Silence Jordan, the riproaring terror OF the
Mississippi valley, and the terror asked
him what his name was. The drummer
replied that it was Willie Phillips. A look
of ineffable disgust swept over the entire
physicgnomical contour of the bully.
'What arc you doing here, sonny"
growled the hideous wretch.
sNone OF your internal - business"
was the astounding reply, and the little
drummer at the same moment nonchal-
antly struck an old-fashioped lucifer
match. The crowd assembled stood para
lyzed with fear as the gigantic rutfian
began to gather himself up for spring
at his helpless prey. AS the flame
spluttered on the end Of the match
held by the diminutive drummer he
tipped the stick with one of his deli
cate lily-white fingers, and tiny globule
of the birthstone shot fairly and squarely
into the left eye of the ponderous
rowdy, who was on the point Of sweeping
the Liliputian from the face of the earth.
ANOTHER SPARK OF FIERY BRIMSToNE.
aAs the burly hummer clapped both
hands upon the optic that received the ter
rible shock the little drummer dipped"the
match once more, and another spark Of
the fiery birthstone flew with merciless
;,;o Il \ spfo {ha nt oy
murderous fiend, who now, instead OF
seeking to devour the puny boy that stood
before him coolly lighting a cigare ;e, was
rolling on the sidewalk writing in the
most painful agony, yelping with all the
power Of his tremendous lungs the while
he endeavored, but futilely, to allay the
agonizing misery that was racking his
very soul and dethroning his reason itself.
never witnessed a more terrible specta-
Gle in all my varied experience as trav-
eler and observer Of men and things. His
powerful frame shivered and swayed, and
his ponderous limbs threshed about like
unto the wild gyrations Of the hideous cut
tie fish in mortal combat. His
piercing screams resouuded afar, and
and soon the entire population
gathered to witness the mad rawlings and
violent contortiOnS Of the erStWhlle mon
arch of hell. But there was none so poor
to do him reverence, and soon it was dis
covered that the proud vulture of a few
minutes before was blind-stone blind.
aVYhen the Joyous tidings Of the awful
fate Of the autocratic enemy Of the citizens
Of otlr beautiful burg were spread around
q glad shout Of victory rent the air, and
the bonfres were lighted and the bells
pealed In token Of the happy deliverance
from the, plague that had blighted the
whole city. For, finding that his vocifer-
ous pleadings for aid and assistance in the
: shape OF an eye-wash were unheeded, ST.
lerce Jordan staggered to his feet, and,
quaking Ia his frightful agony, remarked
that it was bridge time with him, and.
striding to the Suspension, flung himself
into the turbulent waters below, never to
rise again. Cincinnati Enquirer.