Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1886-09-09
MARRYING UNDER Diff
CULTIES.
BY MISS AMELIA THRoPP.


year. He had never been very far from
home, consequently had seen very little
Of the world. He was an industrious,
harmless young man, whose fortune
could never be made by his beauty. He
was very tall, thin, and remarkably
awkward, with small, dull-looking blue
eyes of so pale hue that they looked as
if the color was faded out, abundant red
hair, florid complexion. and large, coarse
features.
However. there is no accounting for
taste, for Jemima Jenkins, the daughter
Of an adjoining farmer, declared he was
'jist the handsumist man she ever cast
eyes upon"
Now, james had great admiration
for the fair damsel, who in her personal
appearance was rs little favored as
himself. She was a short, stout, tow
headed girl. with freckled skin, which
looked as if the flies had been sporting
with it The ill-natured in the neigh
borhood who knew of their courtship,
earnestly hoped they might come to-
gether in matrimony. arguing that it
would be q pity to spoil good-looking
couple with either.
One bright, sunny Sabbath afternoon
in midsummer, as Jim was lying upon
the grass in front of the door of his
fathers house planning for the future,
one of the first things that occurred to
him was that he should get married.
Dads sot on it," he thought, land
so is nam, and l ort tn try and please
'em-its time. could rent old Jake
Spangler's farm, and the money I've
got inter the bank ill stock it, and
Mimie's daddy he'll furnish the house
like he did fur Mat Bum, who married
her sistur Sally Ann. l think I'll jist
go over to old Jenkins and ask hur-
there's nothin' like strikin' while the
irons hot"
Suiting the action to the word he
sprang up and started for the house,
and neatly attired himself, putting some
extra touches to his toilet before starting
on his important mission. He looked
decidedly gay when he had attired him
self in his long gray linen coat, bright
red waistcoat, straw hat, with a blue
ribbon around it, short, very wide linen
pants, and large, heavy shoes. He
made fast time as he crossed his fathers
farm, jumping fences and bitches until
he found himself upon Squire jenkins
land. As he neared the house he beheld
his divinity sitting upon grassy
mound, beneath IL large willow tree,
some little distance from tine house.
''Oh, glorious opportunity" thought
Jim. Il kin iist settle the matter now,
maxim short work ON it. -
As he approached he felt slight
trembling of the limbs, nervous sensa-
ton, but he made up his mind that he
was not going to be frightened from his
purpose.
"a gal kin only say no, to du her
wust, and there's plenty on 'em if she
does. They are jist as thick as black
berries-I kin git another if she's con-
trary."
Summoning up his courage he shout
ed:
Halo, Minnie! be it you? How does
yer beP"
'.Fust rate, Jim! how be yer. am
glad yer come, fur I've been lookin' fur
yer"
"The purity critter. she's jist Dustin
with luv' fur me-" soliloquised the
lover.
sis yer dog tied UP, Mimie?' asked
Jim, ''fur I'm afeard Nv that Gus" look
ing nervously around. "Tother night
as Bill Jones an me wus going home
frum here, he takes arter us. Bill he
runs purity spry, he has sich big feet he
kin git over ground very handy, but jist
as he went tu jump over the horse
trough, he tripped, and in he goes. He
hollered tu me fur help, but, laws! jist
keeps clear out his way, when the tarnal
critter leaves Bill and makes fur me, an
hangs on tu my coat tail with sich a
grip that when 1 managed tn shake him
off he had the whole Nv my spankin'
new coat tail inter his big jaws! Bill he
jist stood and laughed fit tn split hissef.
He wus mad cause he got duckin'."
''Sakes alive! yer might hev bin kilt, "
said Jemima. "Tll coax dad tn shoot
him."
"Mima," said Jim, anxious to proceed
to business. whilst his face became as
red as beet, II want tn ask yer some
thin pertickiler. Yer kin either say
yes or no, but course I'd sooner it. wus
yes. Dad wants me tu git married, and
so does nam, and reckon you'd du jist
as well as any one else, so l jist thought
I'd ask yer"
Jemima simpered and hung her head
at last she said:
There's Lydie Ann Blinker yer could
git"
won't have her, cause she's lame. y
"Well, Sally Jane Grubb-how du yer
like herp
''She won't du, cause she talks
through her nose
There's Ruthie Simpkins, won't she
suit yer?"
mo, she won't, now, cause she's
blind in one eye"
''Yer jist tn pertickaleer. Jimr' said
Nina, delighted to think he preferred
| her to all others. Il won't praise any
other gal tu yer. You don't want to git
married anyhow. What's the use of yer
| foolin'P"
'tDid the gal mean tn say no? Lor,
women wus so queer" he soliloquised,
and backed of, alarmed at Mimie's
manner, knocking, as he did so, against
and upsetting a hornets nest, which so
! enraged the inmates that they made a
grand attack on him.
''Oh, Jemima! Jemima! Jem!-take
'em off; oh, oh, blazes, oh!'' and before
she could realize the situation, he rush
ed by like flying machine, beating
| his limbs with his straw hat. his red hair
fairly blazing in the sunlight.
There was no time for love or romance