The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1886-09-24
THE C0BBLESBURY BURGLARS.

Mr.. Cobblesbury came home to sup
per looking very grave, and sat down
to the table with one hand firmly press
ed over his breast pocket
what have you got in your pocket,
pap" inquired the eldest daughter, Miss
Emeline.
"Hush, breathed Mr.. Cobblesbury,
as he felt in his pocket for the thir-
teenth time in five minutes. "Burc-
larsv'
Burglars in your pocket, pa?" cried
inquisitive Marmaduke Cobblesbury,
aged fourteen.
mo, son." said Mr.. Cobblesbury,
gravely; "but have $500 which John
Spriggs paid me after banking hours
to-day, and it is highly probable that
our house may be visited by burglars
tonight
MIR. Cobblesbury looked so solemn
that the twins, aged five, began to
evince signs of indulging their favorite
amusement of weeping in one another's
arms. All the family excepting
Charles Simon, the eldest son, who
had just returned from college, became
we're grave.
81 have been expecting visit from
burglars for many years, - said Mr..
Cobblesbury. ''It is strange we have
escaped so long"
True, asserted Charles Simon.
Every well regulated family nova
days must boast of visit from burg
lars before they can take their proper
position in society. l learned that in
college"
Marmaduke thought it would be a
good idea to set steel traps in all
| parts of the house to catch the burg
lars
What do the newspapers sayP''
asked Miss Emeline.
Mr.. Cobblesbury could not remem-
Der having read any good recipe for
catching burglars. Charles Simon
thought he would write a book on
the subject as soon as he graduated
at college. But the principal trouble
seemed to be how the family were to
be awakened when the burglars
came.
The burglars will wake us fast
enough, said Charles Simon.
"But they might kill us first,' said
Mrs. Cobblesbury, innocently. g
II read IN q. paper that the safest
way was to fasten burglar alarm to
every door and window in the house. y
said Miss Emeline.
That would be waste of money!
objected Mr.. Cobblesbury, '.for nc
burglar would break in at every door
and window
Besides" said Mrs. Cobblcsbury,
conyincinglly, 'the burglars would
steal the alarms
why can't We put tar all over the
front stairsP" inquired Marmaduke.
Then pa and could kill them in the
morning as we go down to breakfast,
for all the burglars would get stuck
on the way up!''
II do not wish to kill any depredator,
if he will surrender or leave peace.
ably" said Mr.. Cobblesbury. ''The
only arrangement possible is to arm
ourselves to the teeth, and 1 will con
ceal the money in safe place.
The family conceded with this. Mrs
Cobblesbury thought they should re
tire early in order to obtain some sleer
before the burglars came. There wa!
some difficulty concerning the arma
ment required. Both Mr.. Cobblesbur,
and Charles Simon possessed revolyers
Marmaduke took the fire tongs and ar
old razor and tied leather belt arount
his waist. Miss Emeline procured ,
small package of red pepper to throw
into the burglars eyes, but Mrs. Cob
blesbury thought this would be crue
and her daughter compromised OF
black pepper, which would not be 81
strong. The twins wished to take tn,
garden hose to bed with them, feeling
confident that an icy stream of wate
would drive the intruders away. They
were eventually obliged to be content
ed, however, with their popguns and
small tin pail filed with beans.
When MIR. and Mrs. Cobblesbur,
retired the question arose what SHOULD
be done with the revolver? Mrs. Cob
blesbury declared she should die o
fright if the weapon were placed unde
the pillow, and Mr.. Cobblesbury finall,
drew up chair beside the bed and lait
the revolver upon it.
Shall we leave the gas burning?'
inquired Mrs. Cobblesbury, nervously.
'Certainly moi" answered her hus
band. The burglars would then b
enabled to move around with perfec