davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1886-03-16
SUBURBAN NEWS.
sAcCARAPPA.

SACCARAPPA.
The annual meeting of the town of West
brook was held at Odd Fellows Hall, yes
terday morning, commencing at o'clock.
Mr.. Charles B. Woodman, clerk, called the
meeting to order and read the warrant.
The first business in order was the election
of moderator. The candidates were Capt
Isaac F. Quimby Dem.) and Charles E.
Quimby (Rep.), a son-in-law to the opposing
candidate. The result was as follows:
Whole number of otes................13d
Necessary to a choice. e................ sc
Charles Z. Quimby had.............9l
Isaac Il. QulmDy.. y........,............4O
On motion of Leander Valentine, Esq, it
was voted that casting the ballot for town
clerk, three selectmen, treasurer, superin-
tending school committee for one. two and
three years, and auditor should be the only
business transacted at that meeting. 1t was
then voted:
To make use of the check list in voting
To keep the polls open until 4 O'Clock P. NJ
That the meeting stand adjourned until
Wednesday morning, at O'Clock, When the
other articles in the warrant will be disposed Of
There was an unusually large number OF
voters present, there being upwards OF 800
persons in the hall at one time. Several of
the old residents of the town who are seldom
seen at the spring meetings were present and
took an active part in the affairs. 1t was
day of pleasant reunion among the villagers
and country folks, and everybody was
happy.
The voting commenced at $50 and contin-
ued without interruption up to II O'Clock.
At 4 o'clock the clerk announced the result
of the ballot as follows:
Town Clerk-George T. Springer (Rep). $50;
J Clark Scates (Dem) AS.
SeIectmen-Jason Leighton lRep.l, 444; Abner
i Hawkes. xe afS4ps aEsP W 4I1 ect0p MS HIS
b; Woodbury. Dem.), 3s1; Simon H. Mayberry
Treasurer-w. W. Cutter (Rep), 41e; J. Clark
Scates (Dem }, All.
s. s. Commftttee-OneY Year, Charles A. Moses
(Rep.), 447; Oliver A. Cobb Dem), 361; Two
Years, Sylyanus H. Hatch lRep), AT; George H.
Raymond (Dem.) 407; Three Years, H. X.
Grlggs CRep), 1888; H. Percy Walker (Dem)
430.
Auditor-Charles B. Woodman Rep.) 4O2 W.
Scott Pratt (Dem.), 429.
A large per cent. of the ballots were cut
and names substituted for the regular nomi-
nees, personal favoritism regardless OF
party affiliation.
The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1886-03-16
SPECIAL NOTICES.
INSURANCE.
w. ID. LITTLE & CO.,

81 EXCHANGE STREET,
Established in 1S43.
Reliable Insurance against Fire OF Lightning In first
class American and Foreign Cos ai Lowest Rates.
Also Life and Accident Insurance.
TELEPHONE 701. je17sn1y
The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1886-03-16
DAY.

b. A. KINNEY.
Private, Signal Corps, y. S. A.
The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1886-03-16
TOWN ELECTIONS.
Wiscasset.
Especial to the Press

Especial to the Pressl
WIscAssET, March ia large number
were out to the town meeting held in Frank
lin Hall this morning. Richard ii. Tucker
was chosen moderator, and the following Off
GERS were elected for the ensuing year:
Selectmen-Charles Weeks, w. G. Cunningham,
Warren Lowell.
Town Clerk-Sol HolbrOok.
Treasurer-Alfred LennOx.
Town Agent-Henry ingalls,.
Audit0r-F. w. Sewall.
The following were the amounts appropri-
The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1886-03-16

The best of feeling prevailed, and every
thing passed off smoothly. Wiscasset is act
ing nobly in her efforts to shake off the hea-
Wy burden which for so long has threatened
her business enterprises with complete ami
hilation.
Orono.
ORoNo, March 15.-At the annual town
meeting today, Hon. j. W. Atwell Oem.)
was elected moderator, with no opposition.
The officers elected were:
Clerk-Albert White
than Frost
Treasurer-Albert White.
Superintendng School Committee-E. f. ring
Auditor-Hon. Samuel Libby.
Collector-A. G. Ring.
All Republicans except the moderator.
The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1886-03-16

LOCAL WEATHER REPORT.
PnRTLANn. Me. March LIZ
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
The BRITISH LIBERALS
In CONSULTATION ON THE IRISH
H0ME.RULE BILL.
Chamberlain Deluged With Radical
PrOtests-The Past Week In Eu-
IOpean Money Markets.

LONDON, May 17.-An informal Cabi-
net meeting was bed Saturday even
ing and yesterday Mr.. Gladstone held
conferences With his colleagues. 1t is
reported that, yielding 10 the uIg,nt
request OF Mr.. Worley and Lord
Spencer, Mr.. Gladstone mas decided,
in the event OF defeat, to demand from
the Queen an immediate dissolution
OF Parliament. The Liberal Associa-
ton leaders in the provinces have sent
a letter to Mr.. Gladstone, pleading
with him not to resign, out to appeal
to the country with the certainty Of
securing q msjority.
Mr.. Chamberlain is de'uged with
Radical protests. To a Birmingham
Liberal who had written that Mr.
Chamberlain's action had destroyed
all chances OF his ever attaining the
leadership OF the Liberals, Mr.. Cham.
berlain replied that he would sooner
forsake politics than to consent 10
measures that would prove disastrous
to the country. Mr.. Glsdstone's COM
mittee has asked Mr.. Chamberlain TO
formulate statement of the conces.
sions that would reconcile him. The
PSrnellites, though asse nting 10 the
second reading OF the Arms bill, will
oppose advancing 1t to the commit es
stage until after the division on the
home rule bill.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18

PARIS, May l7.-There Was a gen.
eral falling in prices on the Bourse at
the opening Of the past week, owir G
to the fact that numerous sales wei
made for the purpose Of subscribing
to the new lean. Stocks recovered
subsequently, however, and the
market closed active at the highest
figures OF the week Three per cent.
rentes advanced 60c and Credit Fon-
Ger l0c. The new rentes were quoted
at 82f. Suez canal shares have fallen
30f owing to the continued diminu-
ton OF the receipts of the.company,
and Psnama shares, on account Of 3
renewal Of bad reports have Dropped
23t.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
THE HOSTILE APACHES.
severe Rattle Between the Indians
ana Troops.

Tucson, ARIz May IA special
from HuRchuca says: Capt. Hatfield.
with a troop OF cavalry, s'rlick Geroni.
mo heavy blow yesterday morning
ten miles southwest OF Santa Cruz,
but a few hours later received
heavier blow in return. Friday sitter
noon the hostilCs, about seventy
strong, struck MilepAls ranch, round.
ipg up thirty horses. Lieut.. Hatfield
arrived half an hourlRier and followed
up tae trail until dark. Saturday
morning he surprised aud stampeded
the hos iles, capturing their entire
camp ouifi; and horses. He tben
started for Santa Cruz. In passing
through Box cao0n calling fire was
suddenly pour d uFol his little
comm and The men dismounted and
made a gallant fight for an hour, los
ing two killed and three wounded.
May Indians fell, but the n,fHfbtr is
no Rnogn. Lieut.. Hatfield reached
SAutl Cruz, where be will be
joiutd by Lieut.. Cook with
Do st's troop Mai. RIM, with a
large Msxicas force, reached Santa
Cruz Saturday and Joined in the pur-
Hnit Sunday. Gen. Milee, Capt.
Lsbo and Lieut. Davis ara with the
troops. Gov. Torres of Sonora and
Project Riviera of the Magdalene dis
irict are hero in consultation. Gov.
Torres has just received 4 dispatch
from the Project Of Guaymss, stating
that Gen. Martinez sested the HoQuis
tom their stronghold in Sierra Ba-
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
The Hnssn-

On motion OF Mr.. Lanham, TEX.
a bill was passed for he erection Of q
public building at III Paso, Texas, at
a cost Of $4,000.
Under the call OF Safes number
of bills were introduced and referred
The House then vent into com
mittee of the whole, Mr.. Crisp, Gal. |
il the chair, on the Urgent deficiency
bill.
The call OF committees for motions
to suspend the rulesresting with the
Committee on Pacific Railroads, Mr..
Richardson Tenn, ON behalf of that
committee, withdrew the motion
made by him on list committee sus.
pension day 70 supend the rules, end
put on it's passage a bill requiring
the Northern Petite railroad TO pay
the cost OF conveying and surveying
its land grant, aud in lieu thereof
moved TO suspend the rules and
adopt resolution setting apart the
9th and Sth of June for the considera-
ton of businesfreported by that COM
mittee. Mr.. Richardson explained
that the more important measures that
would be edled up were the Joint
resolutions p'oYiding for the investi.
cation OF tho accounts OF the Pacific
ailroads AMI the bill providing for the
funding OF the debt OF those roads.
MIR. Grip lGa explained at some
length tbs reasons OF the committee
for reporting the funding bill, and
then the motion TO suspend the rules
and adopt the resolution was agreed
10 without division.
On motion Of Mr.. 0'Donnell Mich. |.
from the Committee on Education,
the rules were suspended and the
House passed (yeas 203, nays 81 a
Senate bill TO provide for the study of
the nature Of alcoholic drinks and
narcotics and OF their effects upon the
human system, in connection with
the several divisions of the subject of
physiology and hygiene, by the pupils
in the public schools of the Territories
and OF the District of Columbia, and
in the military and naval academies
and Indian and colored schools in the
Territories Of the United STATS
Mr.. O'Neil Mo. from the Commit
tee on Labor, moved to suspend the
rules and adopt resolution setting
apart the third of June land subsc,
quont days) for the consideration of
Business presented by that committee.
Mr.. 0'Neil stated that the bills which
would be called up were those pro-
nib ting the employment of alien and
convict labor on public works, to pro-
tect servants and mechanics in their
wages, and other like measures. The
educational bill would not be called
up under this order.
This statement Of Mr.. O'Neil had
the effect of arousing the aniagonism
OF some of the friends of that measure.
After debate, however, the question
to suspend the rules and adopt the
resolution was agreed to yeas, 108;
nays, Island the House adjourned.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
FOREIGN MISCELLANY.
Mob Law IN Ireland.

DUBLIN, May 17.-News has been
received that mob OF Nationalist
attacked number OF Protestant peas
ants while the latter were returning
from market at Cookstown, County
Tyrone, Saturday. The Professionals
resisted the attack, and several OF
them were roughly handled, two being
badly hurt No arrests were made.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
FORTY.NlNTH CONGRESS-.
FRYE's SHIPPING BILL IN THE
SENATE.
Labor and Educational Topics In the
HOuse-The Pacific Railroads
Resolutions.

WASHINGTON, May l7.-lSendte Al
ter routine businefs in the Senate to-
day Senator Frye called up the Hou,e
shipping bill, entitled "a bin 10 abol-
ish certain fees for official services to
American vessels, and TO amend the
laws re ating 10 shipping commission
ere, feamen and owners OF vessels"
This is the bill passed by the House
OF Representatives on February 4th
last sbolshing the fees for measuring
tonnsee, for issuing licenses, registry
cert fieates and a great variety OF other
fees.)
Tue bill having been resd, Senator
FRYE moved 10 add 10 il as new sec
ton the provisions Of the bill recently
reported by him from the Committee
on Commerce, authorizing the PIesi-
dent to issue a proclamation when
ever he may deem proper, denying
10 ve'eels Of foreign counties such
privileges as are denied in such for
eign countries TO vessels of the United
Stats This is the provision author
izir re taliation for the recent action
OF the Dominion OF Canada in ex-
cludiug United States vessels from
certain privileges in Canadian ports,
but the provision Of Senator Frye's
bill lie not &C Mined TO Canada, but 10
made general 80 as TO apply TO all for
eign countries.) .
After some Inquiry by Senator Nc
Pherson and Senator Vest, and q
word of reply by Senator Frye, the
amendment was agreed TO without
debate.
The bill rs amended by the Senate
Tss then passed, and on motion
OF Senator Frye, committee Of con-
ference was ordered on the disagree
ing vote OF the two Hollbes upon the
bill. Proceeding to the calendar the
Sera pSssed the following measures:
A bill authorizing juries OF the
United States Circuit and District
Counts to be used INTERCHANGEABLE.
A Joint resolution authorizing the
Treasury Department to audit and pay
a claim Of the Kan;as City, Fort Scott
and Gulf railroad br carrying the
mails. u
A bill TO authorize The State OF Cali
iornia to take lands il lieu of the six.
teenth and thirtYsixh sections, found
to be mineral lands.
Az .o'clock the pension bin was
laid before the Senate, consideration
OF which contghued up TO the time
when the Senbte welt into executive
30 slon, and when tbs doors 10; p,nCd
the Senate adjourned
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
Killed Man Iu Her Fathers De.
fNnAO

ST. LOUIS, Mo-, May 17.-Last night
Abel Vliet, a drunken rowoy, broke
into the house of Samuel Fetters, a
crippled ex-soldier. Fette,s attempt
ed 10 defend his home, but was get
ting the worst Of it, when his dsuNh-
ter NoIa, aged seventeen, shot Vliet
in the side Of the head, killing him.
She was placed under arrest to appear
hefcre jnstoA this morning.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
DistIlIery burned.

PEORIA, ILL, May lT.-At an early
hour yesterday morning the watch.
man at the Enterprise Distillery at
Pekin discovered the building to be on
fire. An alarm was at once given, but
before the fremen reached the scene
the building WIS wholly enveloped
and the fl re- beyond control. The dis
tillery, with al machinery q d H.
tents, wGs entirely destroyed.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18

BERLIN, May H. Business on the
Bourse was quiet during the week just
ended, the market, however, showing
a tendency toward strength. 1t is re-
ported that the government has de-
clded to convert Piussian 4s into 35s.
Holders OF debenturs As of the Prus-
san State railways have received no.
tice that they can exch ange their
bonds for 3la.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
EUROPEAN FINANCES.
business Fairly Active at LOndOI
The Continental ROuraeA

NV"S1HU"N"H HIWuH"U"'
LONDON, May l7.-Discouut was
quiet during the week at 81 for three
months and ! for short. The Stock
Exchange loan rats TO next account is
2l@S4. Business on the Stock Elk.
change was fairy active, and prices
ehowed tendency TO rise until the
close Of the week, when the improve
ment ceased. The unsettled state Of
home politics affected dealings. In
the American railroad market early in
the week there was active buying, un.
der belief that the settlement of the
labor disputes would lead to a general
advance, but New York prices not
sustaining this expectation there was
depression at the close.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18

catche on the 18th. killing 100 and
capturing 200. The Mexicans lost
twenty killed and fifty wounded.
Csjeme escaped, but is being pursued
by troops on land and gunboats on the
river. This viItusly ends the Yoqui
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
Killed AhnufnC0u-

ATLANTA, Ga, May 1T.-Frauk p
Gray, a leading lawyer OF Atlanta
was shot and killed In the West End
to-day by Town Marshal Jones. The
tragedy arose out Of q dispute about a
COW. Jones Is in iail.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
Az FrnnhfOrI.

FRANKFORT, May 17.-There was no
notable movement on the Bourse dur
ing the past week, but fair business
was transacted,
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
AdmlnlstratOr's Notice.

Qfhoe Public kdministrator. Shelby County
CoIIthoutc, Memphis, Tenn, April Is, 1885,
TUX underlined hay ne been appointed
Of Heary y. Arnold. dsce ssed, notice Il
hereby given 70 all persons indebted 10 said
estate 10 como forward aud settle; aud 70
those 70 whom said estate IL indebted 70 9 9
their claims with ne. duly probated, within
g SToT S sTsS ?! CHS o "a iSR' VIII
Public AdminiatratoF.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
DIR. ID. 8. JOHNSON'S
PRIVATE
MEDICAL DISPENSARY,
No. II Jefferson Street,

@N0s - gOAOA 0On LaM OCNa
DetWnn Main Aad Rront.l MEMPHIS.
lEstablished in 1850.
is acknowledged By all par
IL ties interested rs By far the most sue
cessful physician in the treatmentof private
or secret diseases. Quick, permanent cures
guaranteed N every case, male or female.
Recent cases Of GonoTrhea and Syphilis
cured in few days without the use Of mer-
curry, change Of diet or hindrance from
business; Secondary Syphilis, the last.ves-
tige eradicated without the use Of mercury.
Involuntary loss Of semen stopped In short .
time. Sufferers from imPOtency or loss Of
sexual pSwers restor o 10 free viRor in few
weeks. Victims Of e-abuse and excessive
yenery, suffering from spermstorrhea and
loss Of physical and mental power, speedily
and permanently cured. Particular atten-
ton paid to the Diseases Of Women, and
cures guaranteed. Piles and old sores cured
without the use Of caustic or the knife. All
consultations strictly confidential. Medi-
cines sent BY express TO all parts Of the
country.
pFWorkingmen cured at half the usual
rates. Office hours from O'Clock am. to 9
O'clock p.m. d. s. JOHNSON, MD.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18

Subscribe for the appeal"
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18

nRhOORATs TO THE FRONT-TO a.
- persons seeking Government Eml
Rloyment in any Of the departments as
Washington, or any other petitions undel
and Hank Forms Of Application on
receipt Of One Dollar. Address JOHN
D. eORGH, Looksbox ass, Chicago
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18

RROWN's IRON BTTrERS COR
- reoted a serious oisoI der OF the bow Is
In Mr.. Q, A. Weiner, Memphis, Tenn, He
eddu[ed much p in, but was cured in shcrt
time b. thi remedy.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
p. M. ST MI E z

A=z.s5=sFsasll' -
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
FUNERAL DIRECTOR,

90 Madison street. Memphis, Tenn
A FULL stock Of Wooden and Meta
always on hand. Orders b. Telegraph og Tells
OphOnO Promptly attended TO-
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
Manhood Restored

hnllkDk I'M "A Tlotim q youth pl impTudenco
rcmcd1, has disooverQd simple msans Of i-ouss
AddrolA J.n-hnkYE&. q OhnlhAmAl 81. NJ Yo-A
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18

NEWSPAPER 4 IS 8; s e 81; sE,.s e.
ADVERTISING !; I; l:::i:
newspapers and estimates o the cost Of ad-
vertising. The advertiser who wants 10 spend
one dollar, hnds 10 Il the information he 70
quires, while for him who will invest one
huI drOd thousand dollars IN advertising, q
scheme is ndicated which will meet his
every requt ement, or can he made to do 90
By slight change easily arrived at BY CORE
epondence. One buudrod and ffty-thres
editione have been Issued. Sent, postpaid,
% any address lor ten Vehs: Apply 20 GEO.
p. RQMkLL 4 CO., NEWSPAPER ADJ
VERTISIN0 BUREAU 10 Spruce st. Print
ne House Square New York.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
AFeWBargains
HAVEYOU MADE ABARsAIN

with your Brain, to do overwork
until you are suffering from Ner-
yous Debility, Dizziness,
RIGHTEOUSNESS, Low
Spirits, Wakeful-
ness, and Loss of
Vital Force?
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
PROBATE COURT SALE
OF
Ke K AL e q TAT Il
In the Town of CoIIierYiIIe. Tenn.

No. 5l2, R.D.-John League, Public Admin
istrator of Shelby county and as such Ad-
ceased, VS.. Maggie A. Brennan ct al.
PY virtue of decree for sale entered here
ID in, April q, 1856, l will offer for sale,
at public auction, at COLLIERVILLE,
TENN. ON
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
HAVEYOU MADE ABARGAIN

With your Stomach, TO overload it
with excessive quantities of Food or
Drink, until worn out it refuses
% do its duty, rejects the food
offered, and with Appetite
destroyed, and Indiges-
ton and Dyspepsia
resulting, it becomes
your enemy?
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18

HRROwN'S IRON BITTERS EN-
~ tirely cured Mr.. s. A. Cocks, 1863 Main
street, Memphis, Tenn, of a severe case Of
chills and fever, He belieyes in it,
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18

RR0WN's IRON BITrRRS CURED
Capt, A 2. fremont. Is Madison
street, Memphis, Tenn, when troubled with
biliouaness. 1t strengthened him so he felt
like q new creature.
The Memphis appeal. [volume] (Memphis, Tenn.) 1886-1890, 1886-05-18
HAVE YOU MADE ABARGAIN
HAVE YOU MADE A BARGAIN

with your Nerves, to exhaust their
'orces, to strain their endurance, and
10 test their strength, until in their
weakness they repay you with
Shattered Constitution,
Lack of Energy, Pre-
mature Decay, and
that KING OF PAINS
Neuralgia.
Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-06-24
BRIGHT BITS.

TRUTH is stranger than felton," was found
In boys copybOok. Much friction is engen-
dered when truth is told too freely Teeds
Siftings.
A WRITER in a New York paper complains
of the plain and homely appearance OF the
lamp posts In that city. He thinks they should
pc more ornamental. Eerhaps it would be a
good idea to ornament each one with an an
archlst-lf there are enough OF this obnoxious
Class TO go around.-ROrristoaon Herald.
AN office seeker sent in his card to the
PRESIDENT inscribed lest mint" The Presi-
dent said he had no time 10 jest minute; and
besides, running the government and trying
TO please both Mugwumps and Democrats
was no jesting matter. Spelling reformers
shouldn't be put into the Offices, anyhow
N0rrtSt0loR Herald.
'MR. JONES, you might lend me that novel
have been wanting to read it for some time"
81 am heart-broken at being compelled to re-
fuse, my dear madame; but I've made it
rule not to len boOks-they are never return
ed. The proof is before you. You see how
well stocked with volumes my shelves are?
Well they are all borrowed"'- Ttd6its.
THE tall man famed himself beneath the
shade;
Into his sweltering face, pensive arrayed.
SAY, Mister, up where you live, is it hot
there?"
He glanced adown. as one deeply annoyed,
The while he wiped the sweat from out his
scraggY hair
''foung man." he said, ''you bet the thermom-
eter has got thereof -GoodaIps sun.
EQUAL TO THE EMERGENcY.-Bob Ingersoll
recently was talking with an old colored wo-
man in Washington upon religious matters.
"Do You really believe. Aunty," said he, ''that
people are made out of dHst?''
"Yes. sab; the Bible says dey is, an an SO
/ b'lieves it,"
But what is done In wet weather, when
there is nothing but mud?p
Den s'pects dey make infduls an SIGH
truck - Puck.
A MAN walked into a saloon on Main street
the other day, and in a defiant tone ex-
claimed: SHOW me a Democrat and will
SHOW you liar Immediately there arose
thirteen men and claimed that distinction
and were about to pulverize the intruder
when he meekly said that il any man would
go around the corner with him he would
show them crippled shoemaker who agreed
to nave his shoes finished the night before but
had not done so. Fourteen beers were next
in order.-SaLeDl I'd. IT, Pioneer Register.
Now, while our Solons are dealing out pen
slons, and spending our surplus with best OF
intentions, present, as a bard of the hum
blest pretensions, few types OF men whom
deem m lst deserving:
Give pension for life to that man self-deny-
lng-ior such Spartan virtue as this is worth
buying-who can fish all day long and 60
home without lying. and tell the straight
truth without shaking OF swerving
Give pension TO him who trades naRs with
out cheating, and tells a good tale without
ever repeating. and is pious at home as he's
pious at meeting all men of this stamp
need liberal pension.
Give pension to him, whether married or
single, who Is never too proud with all men
to commingle; If you have any left, then the
scribe of this jingle presenteth himself to
your klndest attention. It'd Btts.