The Pickens sentinel. [volume] (Pickens, S.C.) 1871-1903, 1886-01-07
NOI5.
wTT AMI HUMos.

u
Then gust of Wind cauio md blew IL aways
White were It's hands as the Decernbor snow,
1T wanted to stay, but the@ind made itgo.
Only adude, with its cane In its mouth,
And It ohoked on the knob as the VIVID blow
- II south; dttsE tttt, t& d3f
Pale was its forehead aud slim we're IT'S pants:
they wcro mado from q garter of one OF his
auntS. ~ lAs ;ESrta Esssr
Only a dude, in tho height of It's PRIDE.
And 1t trpped on.a hair, and 1t fell down and
We searched In its pockets for money in yain.
1t had no moro money than the poor thing
had brain. ,y. .eg -
Robod in y tape.line., it's sleeping to-day;
only dude and it sleeps In the ground,
" - '''' ''' w 'pi'V St. Louis WHIP. y
Prccocious boy (munching the fruit
of tho date-trcc): mamma, if eat
dates enough will | grow up to be an
almanacP"
neatncss upon his olive branches, and,
pointing to the surf, observed to them:
"Hou will perceive that even the sea is
tidey. - EoStoM Gazette.
How much pleasantor this world
would be to live in were it as easy to
90 TO bed at night as it is to remain
there in tho morning, and as easy tc
get up in the morning as it is TO talb
OF Gotting up whom you go to bedl
The wifo of politician, who has
eye for the main chance, keeps q scre
book of I'll the euncomplimentary tf'
printed about her husband, whic
is to index for ready reference in
sons of domestic unploasantness.
At Dinnor.-Horatio (thought \
have proposed to Miss Lucy)-"D&
you like ginger ale, Miss Lucyp"
Miss Lucy-"No, L don't like auy-
thing that pops, except champagne.r
Aiipresent Gin chorus )-"Wo thought
So" ....
y poet writes: II send you my
poem, but l fear l made mistake in
not writing refrain to it, Never
mind, we shall do the refralning for
you. The way in which we shall rec
frain from printing it will finish tie
poem beautifully. Y. Tribune
Instead of the old-fashioned Eyes,
ma'am," and mo, ma'am," which
have been discarded by modern
Madame Etiquet, fashionable children
are taught TO say, Eyes, mamma"
''No, papa" Yes, Mrs. Smith" In
tho revolving OF fashion probably the
antique Eyes, forsooth," will be tho
next substitute. .."|
A grocer's boy complained to his
employer that he was worked too hard
and did not get sufficient rest. 81
know, Johnny" admitted the grocer,
that YOU arc kept pretty busy most
Of the time, but III sec what can bo
done. Perhaps when cold weather sets
III III let you draw mo!asscs onco in q
while. "-BoSt0W Joa!rnal
Why Shc Wcpt.-'I see by cable
| Dispatch" said fashionable uptown
lady, worry much distressed, that the
eldest son of Lord Knowgood is dead"
"Who is Lord Knowgood," asked tho
fashionable lady's husband.
81 only know that he is u member
of tho English aristocracy," she re-
piled, wiping away the tears.
Loss of Appetite. You look sick.
WHAT'S the matter with you anyhowP"
said Gus dc Smith on meeting Gill
hooly. MY stomach is in an awful
fix. I've lost my appetite for whisky,
can't drink a drop" Lost your ap&
petite for whisky, havo youP Well, 1
pity tho poor devil who finds it, unless
ho has credit ut the saloons - Ieras
SVt5ngs. .
"My dear, look down below" said
Grandioso, rs he stood on Waterloo
Bridge, with his wife, and gazed OF a
painting tug hauling long line. of
bargos, "such is life-the tug is like a
man, working and toiling, while tho
barges, like women, are -" III
know" interrupted Mrs. G., acridly,
"tho tug does all the blowing, and the
bargcs bear all the burden. "
Tho only stockholder that ever got a
dividend out of the old Farmington
(Conn.) Canal has just died. The
president told him there was no divI.
dend, and hoprospcct of any dividend,
and jostinGly told him to go homo and
NOW the towpath for q dividend. Mr..
Munson did so, taking 20 per cent.
dividend in hay from the eight miles
OF toWpath, and went on doing this
with perfect complacency thereafter.
NJ Y. SIN.
Queer rPets-"Clcmentina wat in der
world yo' got 'em flies Gagged forp
Fought yo' declar'd yo' wasn't goin'
ter keep no more pets when yo' knary
bud died, ur is it some OBJ de child'en's
WorkF' Lam n me, pap, dem hain't
pets! OATS fly trap wot yo' ketch
ilies wild, doan yo' know; wat Lige
bought dis summah. Wa'al, l won'er
yo' hain't soon dem fore now."--
H0Tper'S BUzor. ,.
"Isn't 'Collar-Button' rather an odd
nickname to give your boyp" asked a
gentleman of friend who had lust
addressed his son by thaS .!tiea>
"Wcll, [ don't know" replied, she
father, laughingly. at may sound T.
httlo curious, but it suits tho boy firstN
rate" y
"Why do you think the nickname
Collar-Button' suits tho boyP''
"Bccauso,'' was the reply, "when he
slips out in tho evening / am never
able to find him. m.-PhtladelphtG CaM
a gentleman having playfully severed
a lock of hair from tho head of ayoung
lady to whom ho was attached, all
though he had made no formal declara-
ton, received next day from her
letter urgently requesting tho ,restora-
ton of the stolen lock. TO this he re-
piled as follows:--
By ono only rccompenso can bc led r
With this beautiful ringlet to part;
II ! have to restore you the lock OF your head.
You must give me tho kcy OF your heart.