Workmen's advocate. (New Haven, Conn.) 1883-1891, 1886-06-13
A CRITICAL ASS.
SOllLOQUY ON INTELLECT.
UAl MONKEYS.
Sublime Cheek and IgnOminious Sub.
mission Hungry in the Midst of
Plcnty-Praying for the
Privilege Of T0iling
For Others.


Those beasts that walk on their
hind legs, like monkeys, and chew
vile stuff, and carry fire and smoke
under their noses, call me an ass.
don't mind what name they give
me as long as they do not degrade
me by coupling my name with any
of their kind.
! object strongly to one of those
palc-faced monkeys calling another
an ass.
1t may be very complimentary to
the other party but it is very humil-
latlng to me.
If these two-lcgged beasts attempt
to place themselves on level with
our race ! shall kick.
have II great admiration never
theless for the power few of these
two-legged beasts have over the com
mon herd. The cheek of the few is
sublime, but the ignomlnious sub
mission of the many is contemplate.
The few lay back and do nothing,
while the herd prepare and bring to
them all the choicest dainties.
The toiling herd build fine dwell
lings and handsome carriages for the
lazy and impudent few, and are con
tent to live in novels themselves.
No ass in the world would be guilty
of such stupidity. II | were to at
tempt to up such job upon my
kind ! would be kicked to death in
five minutes. And yet these pale
faced monkeys lay claim to superior
intelligence. They beg, pray and
fight among each other for the priv
ilcgc of toiling. No ass would be
guilty of such foolishness. They
toll on and fill the warehouses full of
goods and turn over the key to
the cheeky monkeys, who
promptly lock the doors and perform
"a cabalistic sign by placing their
thumb on the end of their nose and
extending their digits.
Then again do these foolish beasts
seek and impIore for more work, not
withstanding they know the ware
houses are full of goods, laying idle
and nnconsumed. But their prayers
are answered with the same cabalistic
sign; or, if they are too boisterous,
with shot and shell.
should like to know the secret Of
this magic power, but ! do not be-
licve one ass, were he ever so smart,
could hoodwink another like these
pale faced monkeys do one another.
These monkeys are queer race;
over us in some way they seem to
have an advantage, but take the av-
erage and they are sorry lot. They
are a sorry lot. They live in the
midst of plenty and go hungry.
They 60 naked, while there is an
abundance of clothing lying idle on
the shelves. They ignore the laws
Of nature, and obey the rules laid
down by their crafty oppressors.
These pale-faced monkeys may be
intellectual, but intellectually does
not fill their bellies nor clothe their
backs, and, until see that it does
so, | shall continue to work as little
as possible, and feed upon the best
can get.
A weak intellect is worse than
none at all. Like a razor in the
hands of a child, it is-pretty sure to
wound those who poss, ss it,. This
is really what is the matter with
these herds of white monkeys to-day.
Their weak intellects are played up
on by the crafty and moulded to
suit their plans. Thepractical COM
mon sense of an ordinary donkey is
superior to the philosophy of weak
intellect. | do not ass-pire to be-
come a pale-faced monkey, nor to
burn fire under my nose.-J j.
Martin, IN Labor Enqairer.