Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-12-13
BRIGHT BITS.

WOMEN VINO have habit of turning round
IN the street to inspect other womens dresses
VIII learn with envy that fish has been
found which has eyes in the back of its head.
-Fedo Hacen Neaos.
"nocToR," said the friend, stopping hum on
the street, what do you take Tor u heavy
cold?'
"A fee," replied the doctor, softly, and SO
passed on.-BUrdeHe.
FoGG-So you have twins down at your
house, have you, Pat?
O'kellv-Who told ye we had twnsP In
dade we have not There is jist wan boy an
wan gurl.-Detroit Free Press
"INDEED, it happened in less time than 1
take TO tel it, said the lady, who was con-
sldered somewhat of a bore.
"Oh, | haven't the least doubt of that" re-
piled her patient and truthful llstener.-
YonkeTS Statesman.
YOUNG LADY-Are you an admirer OF the
beautiful. DR. Slashcr?
DR.. SIasher "a young saw-bones) yes,
indeed.
Young Lady-What is the most beautiful
thing you ever saw?
DR.. Slasher tcontemplativeiy)-We /
think the most beautiful thing ever saw was
the way In which Prof. Deepcutter took a
mans leg OF at the hospital last week.-Neoo
York San.
I'VE been hunting all over the room for a
hair PIN said young lady to her newly
married friend, land couldn't find single
one to save me-
"Of course you couldn't my DEAR" was the
sympathetic reply. Pm married now, you
know"
"And what has that to do with it?" was the
incredulOus query.
Everything, my dear" was the reply; ''my
husband straightens them all out for pipe
cleaners. "-Judge.
Lucy, my daughter" exclaimed a stern
parent the other morning to the eldest daugh-
Ter, who was very late in coming down to
breakfast, where did you spend last eve
ning?'
~ was at a chocolataire given by the Home
Mission Society. papa, at Mrs. Gumbo's."
Indeed! and where were you, Robert?
You came in very late"
And Robert, whose eyes were red and whose
mead felt as big as circus tent, said he had
been on chocolate tear, too CHicdgO Iti6-
V76e.
READY TO BEGIN: Mr.. Winks-I wish, Mrs.
Winks, you would read this article on the
duties of wives.
Mrs. Winks-l haven't time to read now
What does it say?
"Well. Itsays, for one thing. that it is the
duty of q wife to cultivate assimilation. and,
so far as possible, have the same tastes as
her husband"
II never thought Of that
Il suppose not
"No, but if you'll bring bottle of whisky
home with you. I'll try.''-AcntreaL Star,
He had Forgotten His Credentias-He
went up TO call az a boarding house with 4
view to securing rooms. The servant opened
the door and when he asked for the lady of
the house, she told him TO sit down In the hall.
He gave her his card.
"Mr. -. Where is he ?" said the land
lady.
'Shure an he's in the hallway there"
I'm the hallway? Good gracious! Seat
gentleman in the hall! 60 this instant and
show him into the parlor."
The servant girl retired. 81 axis pardon.
sir. If I'd known you was a gentleman |
wouldn't a aXed you TO sit in the hallway
San francisco ChrOnic5e.
set 'em up again" for the boys" and men,
And you'll find they won't refuse;
When you plank down the TN for wine or gin,
ct, see them leave you when you lose.
"Set 'cnr up again" with laugh or grin,
And watch how the "boys" will smile"
When you pay for the shot, and get "red-
hot''-
And they put young Johnny on the Isle.
But the world still goes with friends and
foes;
The ''plucker" and 'plucked" remain;
While the fox takes the goose with his sly
little ruse,
And the ''gander'' "sets 'em up again"
- Wd8hjN0tOn Critic.