The Hocking sentinel. [volume] (Logan, Ohio) 1871-1906, 1886-04-08
HOSTESS AND GUESTS.
Tho Reciprocal obligations which C0ur'
tcsy Imposes on ThCm.

what are the reciprocal obligations
Of a hostess and guestp" Is n question
often asked. Tho replies arc rs vari III
as arc the natures Of individuals. Ono
says, "your time must be wholly given
up to guest who remains ut night UNI
der your roof. II necessary the order
of tho household must bo set aside to
provide entertainment. In short, a
guest should DO regarded rs necessary
evil rs far rs interruption TO tho even
tenor of the way Of the household is
concerned"
Another says: "1hc guest visits you
10 entertain you; she must pay for her
place. and she must take you rs she
finds you; shc is visiting you and must
not do anything else. The fashion some
women have Of visiting friends in the
city, and then going out whenever they
like To call upon an acquaintance. seems
TO mo like making convenience of tho
hostess. II friend came TO spend q
week with me. and from my house went
to spend II day with another friend
whom did not know, should consider
her rude and should not soon invite her
again."
These two views arc the extremes, but
the truth lies in the golden mean. 1t
is, Of course, compliment to person
to invite her for long or shorter time
But the visitor is not necessarily an
obliged party. nor is sho comforting an
obligation. The English custom OF Civ
ing the guest perfect liberty of action
does not obtain here to any great de-
gree, the appointments of our houses as
rule not being adapted to this mode Of
entertainments II guest from tho
country visits us, we should certainly
ascertain whether she desires To visit
friends who can not entertain her over
night. II would, however, be great dis
courtesy should guest make her enter
tainer's house q place of convenience
whence she may go and spend days at u
time, returning when it seems to her
proper. 1t is impossible TO conceive Of
well-bred persons committing so great
breach of good manners, and yet
have known this to be done by persons
who consider themselves well bred.
An equally discourteous proceeding
on the part of the hostess has come un-
der my observation, where guest said
sho would like to spend day with one
of her friends. who lived u long distance
from her own home, but within an
hours ride by rail from the house ut
which she was visiting. She was, how
ever. given SO plainly to understand
that she was visiting, and that her time
belonged to her hostess. that she did
not mako the proposed VISIT and re-
turned homo with new ideas Of enter
tainmcnt
When q friend from tho country Is in
vited for long visit, find out what she
would Ike to do; whether there arc
friends to DO visited and shopping 10 be
done, and plan these matters ut the bo-
ginning of the visit, SO that the ar
ransement Of time may be satisfactorily
made. The pleasure OF the visit will
then DO appreciated by hostess and
guest. 1t Is very inconsiderate to invite
guests in Winter. unless you are sure
you can make thom as comfortable as
they would be ut home. Find out
whether they prefer warm or cold bed
rooms, and arrange accordingly. This
is an elementary principle OF hospitality
which is, however, too often Disregard
ed.-M y. Comn'ercia! advertiser.