Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1886-03-19
WHOLE NUMBER 1878.
A Little Nonsense.

A Little Nonsense.
Miserable. Mistaken Minnesota!
She clamors for annual sessions Of
her Legislature.
The goose hangs high at Paris,
Kentucky. Mr.. Lovely has bssn
oppointed Postmaster, and every.
thing IL ditto.
The chill aud frozen East 10 trying
to feel happy in the belief that every
blixxard has . warm wave behind IL.
. sort OF tin tsskstils tied 70 its
vail ~ II were.
The longest day nj last must end,
And ~ must all sorrow and pain,
but u does not follow that, when you lend
quarter or hall 10 bosom friend.
You will see that quarter again.
Miss Mills. OF Ohio. 10 10 marry
soon. She is the means OF bringing
her great State 10 the fore again.
Her wedding slippers. built in New
lor. ars twenty-five inches long.
Her father 10 TO pay %, 900 70 the
bridegroom.
There Is 4 queer bill before the
United States Senate, ordering the
return to Southern owners Of lowell.
ry and silvsrware taken during the
war. lnasmuch a. Batlsr 10 out Of
politics. We regard it 90 striking q
cross eyed man when hs 10 down.
In Georgia. a calf was dropped
thst had no head. Upon searching
the animal, the head was found
slowed away In its stomach. That
is the fix Of political party that BE-
lieves the purpose Of oil government
to he 10 furnish Office 10 somebody.
Its talents arc all tucked away 10 its
tripe.
They toll in Louisville Of citizen
OF that town who went 10 New York
recently and lived at one OF the most
expensive hotels there. He stayed
four days and asked for his bill.
" Fifty ono dollars" said the CLERK.
" Guess again." said the Ksntuckian.
" You haven't sized my pile yst.
I've more money than that"
The voice OF John s. Wise survives
and is heard crying in the wilderness
for Gen. Sherman's nomination for
the Presidency. The vocal remains
finds an echo in tho hearts of many
people who want 10 soc old Tscump
on tho track just for the sake Of see-
inn hin. All do~c .es~ 4. Al. .L.:- L.
been pulled from under him.
A Mormon going southwark;
Chinaman going West
They stopped oeneath sign board
To sit them down TO rest.
" Now what damned mean country
This ISL the Mormon said;
=" too muchee must glo countlee I"
And Chin Wong shook his head.
" Oh. whel you goin', Molmon3"
Look up and you will know"
The Chinaman climbed the signboard,
And read: TO Mexico -"
- And where you going, hcathen?"
Look upee," said Chin Wong;
They read the other sign board,
This road to reach Hong Kong -"
There 10 little private poker club
in Chicago. whose members, accor.
ding to the Mail Of that city. meet at
bach Others homes and play Q modsst
game. winding up with Q jack pot.
which 10 +" literally sweetensd" until
i 10 Of good proportions. On Q recent
evening the Aosl jack pot
grew until IL contained el28, and
before the betting begun II ives dscid.
cd that the winner should put Il ON
the contribution plate at churchnsxl
morning. 1t was won by . regular
church-goer and rather liberal giver.
who, fearing such . contribution
would provoke comment, asked
leave Of the party to make II up in Q
package and hand il TO the sexton.
This was agreed to en- condition that
it WAS to be labeled " From Q !. not"
This was done. The sexton took IA
'mmsdiatsly TO the pastor, Who wss
20 highly pleased that hs announced
from the pulpit that 80 muniAeent
friend Of the churoh-a NJ. A. ]. Pot
whom Il was not his pleasure 70
known personally b was sorry 10
say, had that morning ssnt in rem.
srons donation Of el28 TO the church
fund.
Ir may not bs generally known
that Laura Don, the beautiful actress
who 10 just dead Of consumption.
has beon the promised heide a thnaaa.
Ands Of people. Twenty one yesrs
ago, whsu she vas young girl liv.
ing In Brooklyn, several bank clerks
bic upon tho joke Of advertising that
On astrologsr would send, for twenty.
i've cents, . picture Of any bachslor's
future wire. The answers vere sur.
prisiugly numerous, and shs smsteur
fortune-tsllers had Q sumptuous
weekly dinner on The proAts. Nor
did they disappoint the ssndess Of The
small coin. Each customer not q
photograph Of = handsome girl. That
Of Laura Don, whom they. unknown
to her. multiplied sxtsnsivsly, thouah
her identity was nos disclossd.
Tnr X. of L. is rapidly becoming
the most powerful organisation n
the country. Here 10 an illustration:
Six months ago there WAS NOT =
knight in Montreal; to-day there
are 70 900. They own one Freneh
any two Enylish newspapers aud
several co-operativs stores. Tue
shops Vt the Csasdisn Paei6o and
Grand Trunk alone have 10000
Knights.
Tnr difference in The cost Of run.
ming stsamers et diAsrsas salss a
speed was forcibly shown % the
United States steamer Wsmpenooo
. number OF years ago. Runsia. i6
miIoe an hour che could aarvv Sna1