The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1886-09-25
A Slight misunderstanding.

But one child-a daughter--had blessed
the union of Mr.. and Mrs. Bumblethorp.
She ripened into womanhood, but In ripen-
inc she had developed few of those femi-
nine charms calculated to attract suitors,
and there were indications that she would
die an old maid if her life was spared.
How to secure husband for her was the
great problem in the mind of Mrs. B.,
which she was continually revolving, in
dignant, sometimes, that her husband
seemed to give himself no concern about it.
But grave subject monopolized the
thought Of Mr.. B. He contemplated
building new barn that should eclipse any
that his neighbors possessed. He had
thought to be the architect of his own barn.
as he had been of his own fortune, and had
drawn up and torn up innumerable plans
for it. But nothing he could devise af-
forded satisfaction.
One evening Mr. and Mrs. Bumblethorp
sat together in their snug little sitting room.
Mr. BIS. thoughts were on the barn, as
usual, and Mrs. B. was thinking Of her
daughter and the wariness of suitors.
At length Bumblethorp sprang to his
feet and exclaimed abruptly:
"By George, | believe 1 will advertise
for proposals y
Advertise for proposals p cried Mrs. B.,
struck all of a.heap, as she afterwards ex-
pressed it; Hwhy, Bumblethorp, what would
the neighbors say to that?"
"Say, my dear? No matter what they
say. It's none of their business, anyhow
Besides, it's not at all unusual. Such
things are done every day."
eyes" said Mrs B., thoughtfully, "Tye
seen advertisements of that kind in the
papers" and she picked up a paper to see
if her eye would fall upon one; "but folks
do not sign their real names, do they? "A
young man of good family and steady habits
can hear something to his advantage by
addressing Mother-in-law
"Mother-in-law Fiddlesticks You
do not know what you are talking about.
1 shall sign my own name. Them fellers
know who Caleb Bumblethorp is, 1 reckon.
"Them fellers, Mr.. Bumblethorp
eyes; the fellers that we want to reach.
Moneys what they're after, you know, and
they'll send in their proposals by the next
mail p
elbow many-er- proposals do you sup
pose we'll get ?" asked Mrs. B., who began
to see an opportunity for making an eligible
selection, though she didn't like that way
of doing the business.
"a dozen, like as not But the more the
merrier. l shall ask for plans and specif-
cations, of course, before selecting one"
"Plans and specifications p exclaimed
Mrs. B., more and more bewildered
"That's what l said. We must have
plans, mustn't we 2"
''Of course" assented Mrs. B., who had
been doing nothing else but revolving plans
for several years back.
''In the first place" continued Mr.. B.,
there must be good solid foundation.
"You mean pedigree"
Snow you are thinking about the stable,
but we will consider that afterwards. The
next thing desirable is good, strong frame,
shall insist on strong frame, and it must
be thoroughly braced up"
But l thought you didn't believe in
bracing up" said Mrs. B., quite shocked
at such radical change of sentiment on
the part of her husband, who was an I'M
bending total abstinence man.
'NIrs B., 1 don't see what you are
thinking of. A brace here and there is
absolutely necessary, and man who knows
his business will put it in
"Perhaps-you mean embrace" said
Mrs B., coloring little.
Embrace !" echoed B., with some sur
prise. Then he added, testify, "See here,
mother, | don't want any OF your weak
puns over the business. This comes of
reading them funny papers.
Mrs. B. rested silent and abashed.
After some minutes thought he resumed:
''How many stories high can we get
along with ?"
''Good gracious, Bumblethorp," cried
Mrs. B.. in genuine alarm, "can't we have
one without any stories attached? These
stories are passed about from mouth to
mouth, and then they get into the news
papers, you know. 1t will be terribly NOR
tifying to Celia Ann"
"Mortifying to Celia Ann? really be-
Geve you are getting crazy. Stories are
necessary, if you want one that will hold a
good deal"
"Hold good DEAL Mr. Bumblethorp ?"
"You know what mean. want one
that is able to stow away lots of fodder"
"Why, I never heard you go on like that
before. Do you want a gourmand for a
son-in-law"
"Gourmand? Son-in-law? Who's talk
ing about son-in-law ?"
"Why, you are, amt you? You know
I've been trying year in and year out to
marry off Celia Ann, and didn't you say
just now that you were going to advertise
for proposals p
"Yes, did" said B., light suddenly
bursting upon him.
"Well, what did you mean by it ?"
81 meant" said Mr.. Bumblethorp,
purple from suppressed laughter, "propo-
sails for building my new barn." And
then he had to run out to the back yard,
where he could give vent to his mirth, in
order to avoid sudden apoplexy.