The Emporia weekly news. [volume] (Emporia, Kan.) 1881-1889, 1886-03-04
WHAT BRorHxR OnoOLIHAH
aAYa.

/ G4ASI1A NBWEs-0cHOrISa xyC %SC-
e living about this place for thlee years
u to-morry, and FIVE looked on good
g dale at the quare way sv achting some
e Az the Tisidints have, and Is few ~
q the quare sarcumstinces that take place
b on sThsted occazIons-
Now, thin, there's she electIn az the
T pFIsint mayor. Plat In this WooFld do
I you iYeT suppose cistey Ioike Emporia
. is goin TO do Wild sech q spalpeen foE its
mayor, anyway? Faith he's . mon
that's not lit to be moulder in feather
foundry; and yit he WIZ ellcted-bad
: cess TO the gang that dun It. Thin,
there's the foln min that
has been appinted on the
force. Take EquInt at
thin from the daElin' av q marshal
, down. and Isn't they daisy lot. And
I've heard it sphoken av before to-day,
shuFe, that there is paless on that force
that accepted hush money from differ
enth sWIndlin' concarns that they should
be srTistin' and the loikes az that.
N oW, moind, I've been on the force IN
the aist mese!f and it's not me to raise
an objhectin' to q paler makIn' the
mosht he kin outn his Office whin the
ciliey is in condition TO sthand the
, racket. But WhIn the money 10 SO badly
needed by that same cIttey, thIn be-
lave it is time to put min on the force
that have little sinse Az roight. But
diyIl bit do blame the palers-its the
min what keeps thin same In their
places that ought to git into throuble.
But, begorra, I'me . fOrgithen
aV meseIf now as 1 didn't
intInd when / stharted to wroight to yez
to say a woird in rIferince to the vIner-
able mayor and the other Siamese Twin
I-phatiVer that manes,-but wanthed
to call yGz SttintIOn to the phact that We
now have q railroad commitiy that's CO
vortin around In the Aist as ripresiutI-
tives av the tax players av Lyon coun-
Thy an SIGH loike, aud I've heard
1t reporthed. an its not me To deny that
same, though dIVil a word do belaYe
aV IL, that whin they stharted away from
this place they aich wan av Thin had Q
tree pass over the Sanity Fay road, and
that whin they ghot TO Khans2s CIttey,
they STINT thin same passes back to
where they ghOt thin, as they wuz
spilin' to pay their own way. Now
Thin If they had in their molnds that this
same schtion would stringihin' the con-
fiiInce aV the ptple in their 'onesty, an
the loIkes av that, it's me phats q
Ian, a. -. Nhak han
mOight jist as we'll aY accipted thin
passes, as the way they adopthed risols-
tions an thin KEEP thin from the psple
before they sthsrted out is not very con-
| doosive to that same way az falin.
An thin there's anither thing altogether
bhest Interests av Emporia. an, begorra
its me that's thinking that 1t moIght be
q forgltihin av it entoirely, if the attn
ton az the cityzens wuz not ATTRACTED
to 1t, an that is that this same committy
WIZ appinted for the tonne az thirty
days, and thin they Wuz to make re-
port Av PLAT they had dun to a meetln'
av the cityzens, which same wuz TO
thaks place at the coort hous to-day, an
bedad where Is that committee today I? |
It's me that's expectin' they is busthed
wome WHARF in In the aist an that they
is Wsithin TO resave the dOoplicAtes av
thin passes that were STINT back. How
liver, that is, their mouth. pace, the
marnin RepOObIicGH kin probably thell
something ave where they is and PLAT
they have dun, and if sich is the case,
begorra Its me an good many other
gintlemin PLAT woold loike to hear that |
same. Yours thruIy.
TERRANoE O'HooLIHAN.
+. Swim on the way to your Office |
with the above letther, came across |
frInd av moine-PaddY Mcguire, maybe
YOU know him-and he told me that he |
had heard about some av the doins av |
the boasthed railroad committy. He |
sthated TO me, confdintially |
loike, tibet the committY on |
rsichen khansss Cittey, as referred to |
abuY. STINT back their passes to q Gintle- |
min named Sivery at EmporIa, and |
sthsted to him that they cooid not con. |
sientiouslY accipt thin and thin sthart- |
ed for St. Louis, WHARF they INSTALLED |
thimsilves at the Southern HOW'LL, the |
bhest house in the cittey, and
afther sthaying thsre short
tonne they whit to Shekagy,
and engaged rumes on the foirst flure av
the Palmer house. Av cOorse this waz
expansive, but then the expinsis av the
committy is pade by a COLLECTION thaken |
CUP here in Emporis, ami the gintlemin
comprizin' av the commIttY ivldintlY
behave that they mustn't kspe
CUP the sthandin' av their
rlsidince while out on the p:azure "Trip.
But bedad, howiver, that is Mr.. Watson
while in Shekagy ATTENDS TO some gas
bizness whole Mr.. Riggs makes frindJy
call on his dather Annie, and Mr.. FlnA
ley,hIs sOn-in-law, begorra, thakes in the
thAysther, but no railroad companYs az
as yit been sphOken with EXCEPT the con-
ducthors av the trains. WhIn mkt heard
av the illegint committy on plszure were
in Niagara Falls-wharivir that is-a
tbaken in the sOights, probably thiukin'
il was the lasht tonne they wOold liver
have the chance to do go
at the expiuse aV their frinds.
Well begorra,to make a short sthory Az
a long "Trip the lasht heard AZ that com.
nifty, they wuz IN OmahAw, Nebrasky,
busthed. Now thin, do yez know that's
ioust phat thot az thin whin they
stharted out SO big loIke, they sinds
back here to EmpOria to their
frinds something loike thIs-so Paddy
SEE. and he's frind av moline and won't
lIe-"Plsze tell Mr.. Holmes-whoIvir
he is, don't know-to thAke CUP anitber
COLLECTION from the suckers and sind us
sum funds Immediately as we need
thin. Also PLACE thell Mr.. SiverY to
sind as that pass We re-
formed to him, IS we
losht the dooplicate IN the aist. We ex-
picted to see some av the railroad com
panies on our return from Niagara but
were disappointed, owing TO the short
ness of our money whIn we had Ghot
thrue q seein' av the soights on our way
there At any rate, If We Iver git back
to EmpOria, We will ex.
plain TO the paple Az
that cittey and our frinds how it is that
it thakes two thr1ps to secure q foirst-
class thrunk line from the aist, ana we
will advoise thin same paple TO sind rs
back agin, as We av had phretty good
time this "Trip, and think We can ave
more fun next tonne KNOWN the ropes
as we now duz. Yours.
When you hold botau flush.
Let IL pass:
Don't be In too big rush,