The Warner sun. (Warner, Brown Co., Dakota [S.D.]) 1885-1???, 1886-04-16

1t IS about this time every year that
the dutiful housewife takes a notion to
clean house, which means to take every
thing in the house and wash 1t in soap
suds, wipe it very dry and place it back
mind you, it must be placed Just So" or
not at all. The carpets must all be tax
en- up and the dust kicked out of them
and then washed and then hung up to
dry and after a week or so must be put
down again, after, however, everything
in the house has been thoroughly over
hauled and cleaned and placed back,
and then placed in some other place, for
it must be Just so" or the ambitious
wife will not be satisfied with the work.
During all these long days the evcr low
ing housewife is toiling in the dirt
which a years time has accumulated,
the husband, the noblest work of God, is
not feeling very well; his business is so
rushing that his presence is constantly
necessary; the doctor has told him time
and again that he had ought to go out
in the country on pleasant days in order
to breathe the fresh air of heaven, or
his health forever afterward would be
shattered; a hunt or a fishing excursion
would do him more good, at this par
ticular time, than the contents OF the
best apothecary shop that was ever
owned by mortal man, with a physician
thrown in with each bottle. At any
rate he manages to stay away from home
the greater part of the time during
housekeeping season. At last the
house is cleaned as is also everything in
it, and as the wife looks around and
sees how neat and tidy everything really
is she smiles a smole and immediately
begins tying up her back hair. But
those carpets have all got to be put
down; one in the parlor, one in the draw
ing room and one in each bedroom up
stairs. Then comes the tug of He
has got to help stretch each one of those
carpets or bust the carpet-stretcher. He
will commence by letting his wife man
age the carpet-stretcher while ne lies
down and pounds his fingers, in an I'M
successful attempt to hit the tack, with
that COMPOUNDED tack-hammer all the
while keeping time to the repeated
blows on his already sore and bleeding
finger with a string of swear words as
long as Mr.. Gladstone's recent speech.
All of a sudden he makes up his mind
to use the carpet-stretcher himself and
let his wife pound the tacks and fingers.
But he soon finds that he has a blister
on the palm of his right hand, the effects
of using the carpet-stretcher too freely,
and about this time the thought strikes
him very forcibly that he has got TO
mail a letter and it lacks but seven min
utes of being train time, so with these
few short words to his wife he drops the
carpet-stretcher, bounds down stairs
and chuckles to himself over the hope
| that Mary will have that measley car.
yet tackled down by the time he gets
back. And she does. She goes to
work then in earnest, tugging, pulling,
lacking and sweating, but she does not
give up until it is completed and as she
sees how much better it now looks than
before she is indeed happy. Ina couple
Of hours her husband comes rushing In
gasping for breath and having a dozer
excuses for being gone so long, but tina
he is now ready to finish lacking dowr
that carpet. His little wife looks VI
tired and care worn and pleasantly tell
him that she has finished it alone, an'
with a deep sigh his humble carcas
drops into a soft bottomed chair and b
is also happy. His health is greatly i'm
proved and his business not 50 rushin
but that he can leaveit once In a while
AT any rate the doctor thinks he wi
live another year If he takes good car
Of himself.