The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1886-09-05

SON LA n OHI Im-DH1G
of the period are seldom left entirely to their
own mental resources and the occasional excep-
tions, like the one mentioned, should impel
others to thankfulness towards the Providence
which kindly preserves them from calamity.
DION BoUcICAULT declares that he is glad he
is leaving England and that he will be happy
when he can get back to the climate in the
United States. Dion is too ingenious by half.
Unless he intends never to play again in Eng
land he has spoilt his chances of ever again max
ing success there English players do not
speak that way of "dear America" 1t will be a
sorry day for American pride when American
actors cannot keep abreast of the world when it
comes to polite lying.
A CoNNECTIoUT man stepped off an express
train while it running at full speed. the
other day, and afterwards explained that one OF
the girls working in rubber factory that the
train was passing had motoned to him and he
stepped off in response to her invitation. He
probably was a married man and was afraid to
disobey. He would do again, probably, were
it not that the experiment resulted in his death
few hours after he made it.
BETHLEHEM, N. H., has the distinguished
honor Of being the meeting place of the congress
of victims of hay fever. Next we shall hear of
national councils of people with sore eyes, and
then the victims of cholera will assemble. per
haps. only if they do they will have to do so in
hurry. AS rule cholera patients do not have
much time to fool away in preliminaries.
A PASTOR at Cheshire, Conn, recently read
sermon that had been delivered in 1872 by Rev.
Samuel Hall, the first minister in the parish.
This indicates that the bottom of the barrel has
nearly been reached and the congregation have
reason to expect that some time soon they will
have the novel experience of hearing an original
sermon.
THE latest invention is that of artificial milk,
recipes for making which are being sold to milk
men in Eastern cities If it is richer fluid
than the kind they have been producing with
the aid of the pump customers should encour
age its manufacture. Perhaps it might be used,
also, to improve the quality of bogus butter
THE Atlanta Constitution publishes "a little
gem" by "gifted authoress," entitled, II am
Tired" which it says has not been surpassed
since the days of Byron. We are not so sure
about Byron, but if the gifted authoress is as
tired as her verses make the readers, she will
not be able to write any more this year.
MISS PHGBE HARRoD, of Newberryport, N.
Y, recently celebrated the one hundredth
anniversary of her birth. There was prayer
cd tod
and hymn sung, all original and for the occa
sion The old lady demonstrated her staying
qualities by surviving the ordeal.
A CHICAGO man left will describing the kind
Of inscription be wanted on his tombstone, and
stipulated that his name should not be men
toned One of two things explains this action:
He was either afraid of the way tombstones lie,
citizen of Chicago.
LILLIAN NJ. THOMPSON sings as follows:
To and fro, to and fro, slowly swings the churn
Lillian we do not care TO disllusionize you
but, in truth, the article of domestic furniture
that swings to and fro is not churn at all, but
is a--a-er-are you married Lillian?
THE alleged sea serpent is now as far north in
the Hudson river near the city Of Albany.
The capture of this monster" might result in
demolshing some of the extravaganza stories
that have been in circulation concerning it.
A. Fl. BLISS, once telegraph operator on the
Chicago Board of Trade, has become worth a
quarter of million through secrets gained dur
ing the course of business. In this instance
Bliss was not ignorant
STATE ENTOMOLOGIST j. A. LTTNER, of New
York. says this has been poor year for insects,
not nearly so many being found as last year.
Perhaps they had the room papered.
THE Charleston News, of Wednesday, notes a
rise in real estate in that vicinity, and nothing
was further from its mind than joke 1t sim
ply told the truth
VICTORIA MoRosINI cut off her husband with
Schilling.
BREAKFAST TABLE CHAT.
NINE. PATTI has received a warm letter of con-
graduation upon her marriage from Queen Marie
Christiana of Spain.
THE Lowell Citizen is watching to see if Dr.
Holmes is still an American. Says that paper
'If he publishes book abusing all the men who
entertained him, we shall know he is quite
English"
Mr. GooDALL, the manufacturer of pushes
and rugs at Sharon, Me-, has one room at his
| summer residence at Old Orchard devoted to a
rare collection of automatic toys, and visitors
come daily in large numbers to inspect them.