davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15
NO CONSIDERATION.

An old negro who had just arrived ln town applied for help
 What k themattcr with you2 some one asked
 "Wan sah. chcrything got k Ter de ohertlow
 Stock all drowned2'
 ~ as. sah, all
 "tiot no place to stay
 "No place on de face Q de Lawdul mighty yeath. sah
 And you want some money /" IF few dimes, ei yer please, sah Where k your place.
 "On Lick bayou. sab
 "Un which slde?"
 "This side
 " hat k your name2
 "Anderson Potter
 Well Mir Anderson Potter. l live on Lick bayou left there yesterday morn ing and there was no high water :" But de water has rig mighty sense den
 And more than that. no one named Anderson Potter owns place on the bayou l know everybody in that neighborhood
 " Dis heah is crnudcr Lick bnyou Faint de one yo' se'fs thinking crbout U Well. go on believe yo,Y are an old rascal .
 Lemmc splain de sichcrwation
 Never mind
 Ain't swine gimme CT chance2
 You don't need any
 An da say dat CT niRgcr is got CT show in dis country tooY
 Never mind, go on
 "Dcmned widout my case goin' fore CT jury
 Go on. tell you You are an old thief"
 He moved away, stopped when he reached the street corner, looked back scratched his head and said
 Doan peer ter be no sympathy fur CT workn' man in dis hcah country. jay Gould hab got dis community by de ho ms Rcckin I'll hab ter zort ter ccp. tion artcr dis Faint my fault ef l ain't got no fam an cf had one 'tnint de riber's fault dat it ain une CT water, but desc white folks ain got no sid"ration '
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15
CONVINCED HIM.

A man applied to the proprietor of "A St Louis mercantile establishment Y" see that you advertis" for man to travel in Arknnsaw, sad the man Yes. sir
 Y" l would like to secure the plac" Do you know many men in Arkan. saw
 Yes. sir know nearly every prom inent man m the state
 How long hay" you lived tber"i Six months
 What md know 20 many prominent men2
 Yes. sir
 How can you have made scquain tances so rapidly?
 Easy enough ran blind tigers in prohibition towns
 "Ah, see. now Please excuse my ncreduiity.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15
THE DESPERADO.

The desperado is iatalist He scorns the world shoots the flesh and openly associates with the devil An example has no influence on n desper- ado. All his companions may die with their boots on, but he knows that he will not. What astonishing chances he takes; how he scornfully tweaks the nose of danger A man places pistol to his breast, and says: "I am going to kill you The pistol snaps, and the desperado laughingly kills the man. Thus favored by that peculiar fortune which seems to admire fearless men. the desperado does not believe that any one can kill him His narrow escapes. instead of causing him to be more dis erect, encourage greater recklcssness. At last, when he least expects it. he meets quiet, unassuming man and k killed. some one else promptly takes his place, graSping for the distinction of being known as the toughest citizen since Bill So-and-S0 was killed
 There are but few desperate men in Arkansaw. In this state the criminal law is enforced with an exactness which disgusts and discourages these aspiring gentlemen Occasionally. in the quiet shades of the remote township. one fires his revolver and dances to the deep bass notes of dying groan, but shortly afterward he says
 Good people. we meet to-day for the last time on earth, but hope that we'll meet in heaven. know that the Lord has forgiven me. l aint got nothin' against nobody The sheriff has been mighty kind to me, and hope to meet him in that bright and cheerful home above the stars Good bye
 The sight of rope has softening influence upon the desperado Then he begins to forgive people. Oh. how gen erous he is And meek, Why hen pecked husband lugging fat boy under an August sun k not 80 meek as he. The implorations of despair, the tears of a woman nor the shrieks of child have any effect upon the desperado, but he is strangely affected by the sight of a moose
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15
PRINTERS INK.

The DeyLtnd Hoathiy i. fulfilling ths fonds-t predictions Of it's friends IL is a credit to California
 The Jo,ige. under ;he editorial man age,nrnt of J M Gregory. continues to improve In its line. the .Js1l,s aek nowi. edges no superior
 Tn. New York 7iAB,s. in conss- queuce of recent Improvements has changed its price from three to five cents. At fret 1tkB,ts wa. filled with sxtrarts from other papers. but now it is filled witb the best original matter that can be procured.
 The form of Texae S,fnags has been changed, and it now comprises sixteen pages. 1t is. without question, one of the best publications in the country. due to the ability of Alex. E. Sweet. editor, snd J Armoy Knox, manager. A. Miner Griswold, so well known as the q Fat Contributor is now editorialIy connected with SVtaos.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15

took up decorated shell looked at lt, put it down, looked at the clock, took up his hat and quietly left the house His heart was heavy. much heavier than his brain He walked with a slight limp. Why? The corndoetor s cNperi- ment had not been successful llchlrw his nose Then he sneezcd When he reached the street corner he >neeacd again A girl passed looked back at him and gisgled. He despised gigslms girls. His sister who married man who possessed epilcptic fits did not gig gle He followed the girl He drs- pissed himself for doing il but he eouldn help it. It was the first time he had ever followed a girl He overlook the girl
 How are vou2 he asked
 She gigglcd and said that she was able to get about
 know that, said he
 Then they both giggled He turned and left the girl His heart waS full of sweet sadness He regretted having spoken to the girl for he had not been brought up with her yet her bright im- age, as it hung before him in neat, black walnut frame, smiled upon him and made his heart beat with joyous throbs " must not speak to her again he said but the next minute he ran after her. He overlook her and said
 How are you by now?
 She smiled and said that she was still stirring He turned and ran away That night his sleep was not sound He was in love
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15
THE BEST IN THE LAND.

An old negro advertised place for sale 4 man who had examined the house. and who was pleased with il. called on the negro asked.
 Fines in de Ian
 If thought the well was good I'd buy the place.
 Ncedn let dat trouble yer sab fur l tell yer dat it's de bes well in dis town ''
 He bought the place About two weeks afterward he sought the old ne. gro and after swallowing large lump of wrath. said
 You old scoundrel. you told me that the well was good '
 Wall sah
 And now there is no water in if. The neighbors tell me that you hauled water in barrels and poured 1t into the well
 What come Q de water?
 |" have used il up
 Didn' leak out did 1t?
 suppose not.
 Den de wells all right Takes CT good well ter hole water. knowd dat well wuz all right fur dug it myse' f an walled 1t up wid de bss rock could git
 Yes but confound your ugly picture. there k no water in ii
 Oh. yer didn ax inc erbout de water axed me erbout de well Ef yer want ed to know suthin' crbout de water v ' Ut yer AK me- Good day. sah
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15
A QUARTER OF MUTTON.

Extract from letter to the governor of Arkansaw:
 send you by John Cobbletree, one of my neighbors, a quarter of mutton and mess of young squirrels. I do this jest because like the course you have always took I killed the squr- rels yistidy an know they air fresh. Thar aint nothin nicer than young squirrels. 1 eat 'em sometimes till am l fit to pop. Now let me say something about the mutton It is fresh an fat an I hope you will enjoyit. One of my neighbors lost sheep the other day an he has accused me of stealth it. He has had me arrested an 1 am now in jail. He come to my house an grabbed holt of a sheep that I had jest killed but managed to keep enough to send to you. I am mighty fond of sheep meat an when am right hongry ken eat it till I am fit to pop. My trial will come off in day or two an the way things are shapin' am afeerd they will put it to me jes fur joke These folks out here air the prankinist set of people \ ever seen. They air allus happy when they ken git joke on prominent man like me. I wouldn't be surprised if they carry the joke so far as to want to s send me to the penitentiary. This would hurt my chances for the legisla- ture. don't want to be beat but if they keep me shut up very long the other feller will git ahead of me After you eat your mutton wisht you would write note to the sheriff an tell him to let me out. Say, forgot to tell you that the gran jury has been let into the joke an that they have brought in a joke of an indictment ag'in' me They may try me an pass the joke of sen tence on me before your note gifts here 30 wish you would write out pardon 2 after you eat your mutton an tell the judge that am free. I know the joke Twill tickle you and you may make the pardon read just as amusin' as you please"
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15
AN ECONOMIST.

Arkansaw schooIteach"r (to boy ~- Why don't you study your Iesson?
 Boy Cause don't know where 1t is
 Teacher" Look on the seyenty-sec- ond page
 Boy (after turning the leaves of his book )--" It's tore out.
 Who tore it out.
 Dad"
 What for7'
 Ter light mans cob
 Well, borrow another book Say. why don't yon blow your nose1 Cause ain't got time. I'm goin out pretty soon all let the wind blow it"
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15
PRICE, ! CENTS.
A BAD DOLLAR.

Cattlrtan, the grocer. knew that soms one was rohling his money drawer Naturally hl~ suspicious felt upon old Steve, ,hen"gro porter Streeprotcsted hl~ inuorvuec tNttleteu was deter mined la search hun, se, one night about the time Steve was ready to 20 home the grocer approached hun and sald
 Steve. l must search you
 Whut far. hos~'
 You know what for Come. take oil your clothes and shake them Steve ohesed Nothing was dtacov- ercd The next day the Frneer saw Steve lowering over thr cash drawer That evening tho grocer said Steve, }ou ar, a thief
 Who said su sah
 !" do
 Who tole yer so?
 Never mind. know il You have been rohhng me for some timn and -" Wall sarch me. sah
 Keep on your clothes
 Snreh me el yer want to. sab Never mind. Nay. what the matter with your voice.
 "Nothin'
 " Yes. there Ia something Open your mouth
 Kan open it much. bo.s sorter got de lockiaw
 think that oan assist y"u Tho grocer bent Stoves head oy.r tl.a rn,ln. ter and placed hi. thumb under the ncRros jaw Silver rattled on the counter Spit out some more "KAn' do it, boss. fur dat. all "Spit again. 1 tell you
 Five nickela fell Froih atcve's mouth, Come again
 Char ter goodness boss. I kaint spit no mo
 "Go ahead tell you
 twenty iive-ccnt piece fell out " Once more" said the grocer Come again Wy" he added as n fifty cent piece rolled on the counter. "you'v got mouth like ground squirrel v Now, boss, dat'- all Hope mer die dead If II ain't "
 Try just one more time
 Sw ar dar am nn use boas Come again. or I'll break your jaw " D,i. :atlled dollar There" add th" grocer, releasing his hold on Steve, you may go now
 Ain pwinc ter discharge me is yerr" "of course. 1 am Go on away Whut discharge ms .jcs fur dat little caper'
 "Go on, or I'll have you arrested !" Didn' know yer wuz 70 ongrateful, snh Been wuckn' like CT -labe fur yer an aliA ia all de thanks git Kf yerii jos keep me 1 sw' ar 1 won't nrber tech yer money no mo
 No 1 don't want you
 Wall gin nc CT rickefmeni ter sorns white man
 " won't do that. either Get out of here
 All right. sab An All dis ha nut tered as he moved away. "wul all on ercount o' dat ole trade dollar whmt ain't much srcount, nohow IIadn' crowded dat in my mo,If my voice wouldnter gin me erway
 PRINTERS INK.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15
LIKED HER SINGING.

Friend (to ac4naiDtance)--'' Wonder goes the only man who enjoyed Clara Louise Kellogg. singing the other night"
 Acquaintance" He must be per. sonai friend of Kellogg"
 Never saw her till the other night" Then why did he like her singing7" Hes deaf"
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15
NOT AN AMERICAN.

gentleman while in London. ap- preached a well dressed man, and said
 Excuse me, sir, but are you not an AmeYican?"
 The man scowled and replied: No. am not ar American. am the United States minister. and am consequently an Engiisbuan.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15
KNEW WHERE.
moose

\ man jumped of railway train and sprang into a hack
 What hotel do you wish to go tor" asked the driver
 am an Irishrnan and have just ar- rived in this country, and
 An, see, you want me take you to the polls.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15

Jefferson Davis, says Chicago news paper. speaks elegant English" Yes, but he speaks rather too much of it.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15
VOL. 8. NO. 9.
LIMNINGS.

The telescope of the Great Lick ob- servatory draws the moon so close that you can read the advertisements on the board fences.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15

It is bad idea to make one enemy in order to secure two friends. for, long after the friends have forgotten you the enemy holds you in active recollection.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15
FICTION.
Old French and New American Styles
 of Novels.

of the new fiction of America. The fol- lowing is an extract from masterpiece of French fiction:
 NJ De Makeshift, when the file of soldiers left him, found himself in a dungeon Not a ray of light penetrated the dismal abode, but De Makeshift's s eyes gradually became so accustomed to the darkness that he saw a broom straw lying in corner He caught up the broom straw, uttered q stihed cry and pressed it to his heaving bosom. Then, in his despair, he tickled his nose with the straw and laughed.
 "Who laughs?" demanded voice. i do"
 "Who are you2
 De Makeshift. Who are you?" The Abbo So-Long.'
 "Ah."
 An, hah.'
 How long have you been here? ' I have now, alas no method of reck- oning time but must have been here since sunrise this morning.
 De Makeshift groaned. Where are you now?" he asked
 "In tunnel" the abbe replied. "A tunnel?"
 "Yes."
 "You make my heart beat. Where did you get the tunnel2"
 Made it."
 You astonish me.
 An"
 "Ah, hah Where did you get your shovel?" 8-
 Had none.
 Then how did you make the tun- nel?"
 Listen"
 "I will"
 I scooped it out with shirt button. Have you button on your shirt? No"
 Alas, you are married
 No"
 "Then why have you no buttons2' A Chinaman does my washing" "Ah."
 An, hah
 Well, wait until l gouge my way through this rock and will lend you my button"
 "Oh, thank you
 Hist, the turnkey comes
 After long silence: " Has the turn key gone?' the abbe asked
 Not yet"
 Well, when he goes tell me and will resume my work
 All right, he's gone now
 1 am at work"
 Scoup, scoup scoup. A long, bony arm was thrust into De Makeshift's cell De Makeshift seized it and pressed the elbow to his lips. The abbe stepped into the cell We must escape from here, said the abbe.
 Howl"
 By scaling the walls.
 How can we scale them without a knife2"
 Wait"
 The abbe took off his shirt, tore it into shreds and, in marvellous manner. made ladder Got a couple of pinsY What do you want with them?'
 Make hooks to go on the end of the ladder"
 Here they are
 Now" said the abbe, bending the pins and fastening them on the ladder, follow me"
 They passed out into the court yard. DeMakeshift uttered an exclamation. He saw the man who had poisoned his grandfather. The abbe threw the lad der. The pins canght hold; the two men escaped.
 The following is an extract from American realigm:
 Samuel" said Miss Peterson, have you taken the ashes out of the stove?" II guess I have"
 Did you fix the kindling?"
 "I guess I have"
 Samuel arose, stretched himself, blew his nose on a bordered handkerchief,
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15

Dyspepsia" said Carlyle, kills poetic ambition The world owes dys- pepsia heavy debt It is a pity that Tennyson' stomach is not triAe weaker
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15

MT. Dana says that it would be better for the Democratic party had it been beaten at the last election. Mir Dana is political joker, but it would be bet ter for several Democrats had they not been appointed to office
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15

Can you tell me- writes young man, whether or not it is important to have rhyming dictionary. have con cluded to become poet Yes, by all means get rhyming dictionary; and, say, while you are about it you'd better get mule and blow.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15

The New York Morning Journal says that William H. English is investing much money in natural gas but that he did not find it to pay in 1880. The truth is that William expended but lit tie money for gas in 1880. He would rather have money than to be vice-presi- dent.
The Arkansaw traveler., 1886-05-15

Every man who comes to the United States and refuses to live under the laws of the country should take his choice between immediate departure or death. Americans are not a riotous people, and above all, they are not anarchists. There is but one way to deal with an anarchist. Kill him.
 A Washington dispatch says that MT. Garland has his grass cut with an old fashioned scythe instead of with lawn mower. This may cause uncompliment- ary comment but we rather like Mir Garland's idea in that the scythe is more emblematical of time than lawn mower Justice, you know, is not only afflicted with weak eyes but is very slow
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1886-03-23

~ Special Attention given to forwarding
bodies 10 all parts of the United States. Tele-
phone connection. Calls attended day and
iVbt SNly
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1886-03-23
Total e1penses for year 1ss6. :. S 81, 93s

Total expenses for year 1886. 8 23s, 93S 90
French-How are we going to meet
this appropriation We certainly ought
to have the source of revenue. 1t is
very important matter for this Council.
We cannot act intelligently on it with
out.
Belknap-I thought it was here. but it
has been left out, and the total revenue
is estimated at S250,0O0.
French moved that action on 1t be de-
ferred.
GalIagher-It seems to me that the
gentlemen Of the committee have not
made a sufficient appropriation for the
laboring men, and think they should be
paid S 80 day instead of Sl.25.
French's motion 10 defer action until
the next regular meeting was amended
by Schreiner, that a special session on the
budget be called, which was accepted
by French, and adopted.
The Public Improvement Committee
recommended that a gas lamp be placed
at the corner Of West Commerce and
| Stoves streets, and that the sum Of $40
be appropriated for that purpose.
Adopted.
The Committee on Petitions and Ordi-
nances presented the amended pound Or
dinance, and 1t was finally adopted.
The Committee on Streets and Bridges
reported on the petition of a. G. Clark
and 5. Clark asking that enCroachments
on alley between Avenues b and G be
allowed to remain. 1t was recommended
that the petition be not granted and that
the distractions be ordered removed at
once. Adopted. Gallagher voting nav.
The petition to have bridge over St.
Martin Creek, Luis street, was granted.
The petition to have Hood street
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1886-03-23

city, and further recommend that $1,000
be appropriated for such necessary eX-
penses as may be incurred for detective
work. desire to compliment Captain
Phil Shardein and his able assistants on
the manner in which they have preserved
the peace OF the city, and we may well
congratulate ourselves in having one OF
the most orderly cities in the United
States.
We are indebted to The physicians COM
posing the Board of Health for their as
sistance in managing the smallpox cases
during the recent scare, ana particular
ly are we indebted TO our City Physician,
Dr. Julius Braunnagel, for the prompt
and energetic manner in which no
fought the disease, needing naught
but his professional duty. lie
was at the bedside OF all those who
were attained by il. The sisters OF
charity and the sanitary officers did also
good work-the sisters particularly we're
unIiring in their efforts to relieve the
sufferers.
am glad to announce that the small
pOx has been stamped our, and that the
last conyalescents will be discharged
from the pest-h0use In a few days. MS
subject calls TO my mind the imperious
necessity existing for the removal OF the
pest-house from its present locality to
another one more isolated, and there
fore recommend its removal.
In conclusion, allow me TO cOngratu-
late you upon the good which you did
last year, and to express the wish that
you will do equally AS well for 1857.
And as for myself. | desire to return TO
you my sincere thanks for your cordial
support. Respectfully yours,
BRYAN CALLAGHAN, Mayor.
The statement of the receipts and ex-
penditures made by the City Collector
and mentioned in the message, were re-
ferred to the Finance Committee.
The Mayor also stated that since the
close of the fiscal year five notes OF
$40, 600 each had been paid and another
| would be liquidated in few days.
The Finance Committee, in addition
to its monthly report on officers state
ments, submitted the budget for the
fiscal year 1861, as follows:
Estimated expenditures of the city of San
Antonio Tor the fiscal yea 1885, ending Feb
ruary y, 1881
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1886-03-23
LOCAL BUSINESS NOTES.

When you need any job printing call
around and get prices at the LIGHT
office.
DIR. l.. V. Weathers. acute and
chronic diseases a specially. Graduate
of jefferson, (Phila.) college, 1866. Office
at Nette's drug store; telephone lis.
3-6-2m
Plymouth Rock and Light Brahma
fowls and eggs for sale from pure bred
stock. 80 SOledad street, A. Il. Hurley.
3.Glm
Why buy elsewhere your Horseshoe
and Square Meal where you can get
them at 40 cents per pound at Wultf's
cigar store! Left
If you want to buy or sell any kind
of stock or real estate, go to Chavez,
NORM & Mateu, South Flores street.
They will deal squarely. l-2-tf
XXX X. stands for Kay's Kentucky Kure
or Liniment, which Is made 10y an Old Ken
lucky horse doctor, and Is Z perfect blessing
to man and beast for all purposes liniment
can be put to. sold by F. Kalteyer Son.
Chavez, NORM & Mateu have taken
charge Of the stock yard on South Flores
street, south of Military plaza, where
they will do commission business, buy
ing and selling all kinds Of stOckl.9-tf
Just received, at Fowler's drug
store, few copies Of "JOhnson's HO-
meopathic Family Guide" Practical
Guide TO Homeopathy, also family
cases. Lett
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1886-03-23
Proposals for Construc-
ton of Walk.
HEADQUARTERS DEPARTT OF TEXAS, J
OFFICE OF CHIEF QUARTERMAsTER.
San Antonio, Texas. March 8, 1886.

SEALED PROPOSALS, in triplicate, subject
- 10 usual conditions, will be received at
this office until IL O'Clock, noon, on the 2}rd
day of March, 1886, at which time and place
they will be opened in the presence of attend
ing bidders, for tn construction, at San Anto-
MO, Texas, of 1872 lineal feet of Walk, accord
ing to plans and specifications on file in this
office. which will be shown blank proposals
furnished, and full information as to manner
of bidding, and terms of contract given, on
application.
The Government reserves the right to reject
any or all proposals.
Envelopes containing proposals should be
marked: Proposals for Construction of
Walk" and addressed to the undersigned.
j. G. c. LEE,
Major and Chief Quartermnster.
3-9-4t
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1886-03-23

Why don't you use ORIDONTO TO Cleanse,
Beautify and Preserve your Teeth and Gums
sound and ornamental state TO old age 2
Only 30 cents box. Liquid and Powder. At
all druggists. Sold by +. Kaltcyer Son
DIR. Sam johnson said: Those who marry
early, think most of their wives and they
who marry later in life, think most of their
children" But il is a happy fact that Brown
Iron Tonic cures with equal power both the
young and the old. IL is made for all alike.
For sale by Raglsnd & Co. 10
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1886-03-23

New Goods for Spring.
Fine line of suitings for custom suits,
Just received. PANCoAsT & Son.
2-26-tf