davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

A big trade-Swapping elephants
Sittings.
Circus tumblers are afflicted with
vaulting ambition. -L0WeN Citizen.
The mau who minds his own business
as he ought to is seldom idle Call.
If watch company should get into
financial difficulties could it do business
on tick?
A hen in the garden of woman has
"shoo" her enough chance of being run
out.-P:cGyttHe.
where are the Britt h Isles located,
Johnn John-"The British asles are
located in the British churches, of
course. "--SUtug'.
There are few more pleasant sounds
than the ringing blows of woodlands
AK when some one else is welding tho
AK Somer0We Journal.
Policemen are very impartial
When arrests they are II aking,
They lut men i'll Jail for sa. Q keeping,
And some for safe-breaking.
-Itd-BitS.
'I'm looking for employment" said a
young man entering "a merchants Office.
''You are, hey9 Well, you'll find it in
the dictionary over therc-er- among tho
Els. "-TId-B Bits.
Her eyes were bright,
Her face was fair,
Her teeth cleaned out like pearls
Her neck was white,
Her wayy hair
Hung down in sunny curls-
BY why attempt to tell OF all
The charms of baby's big wax doll'
Merchant T'rareIer.
A defaulting cashier endeavored to ex-
cuse his financial dercliction on tn plea
that he was only following out the scrip,
tural injunction to ''Hold last that mich
is good. "-BostoH Post.
The Russians are taking the lead in
fiction. 1t is no trouble for Russian
novelist to fill book. When he writes
the names of five or six of his charac-
tiers one volume is completed. --Arkan-a u
Traveller.
Nine one-legged men played game
of baseball against nine one armed men
in Southern Illinois the other day. The
one-armed men had the advantage of be-
ing able to kick against the umpirc's de-
cisions. - Chicago Nea0S.
She went adown the garden walk,
His arm was round her waist;
Snow don't do that" she bluntly said,
"You know it's in bad taste.
"Im sure cannot see it sou
He said with some grimaces
"My hand Pm only trying now,
At making glad waist places
-BoSto.t Budget.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10
StOnewall JacksOn's Flank Attack at
Charlottesville.

From General O. o. Towards article
in the Century, we quote as follows:
Somebody's guns Numbered away for
a few, short minutes, and then came the
ftful rattle of musketry; and before |
could aga, get into the saddle there
arose the ceaseless roar of the terrible
storm.
Il sent out my chief of staff, Colonel
Asmussen. who was the first officer to
ouat2'The ring is in front of Devens,
go and see if all is in order on the extreme
right He instantly tuned and gallop,d
away. mounted and set off for promi-
nent place in rear of Schurz's line, so as
to change front to the north we of
every brigade southeast of the point of
attack, if the attack extended beyond
Eeven's rigat flank; fer it was OWNED
at once that the enemy WAS now west Of
him. | could see numbers of our men
not the few stragglers that always fly
like the chat at the first breeze, but
scores o them-rushing into the open
ing, some with arms and some without,
running or falling efore they got behind
the cover Of Deven's reserves, and before
General Schur~ waiting masses could de-
ploy or charg.. The noise and the smoke
filled the with excitement, and to add
to it Dieckmann's guns and caissons,
W tn battery men scattered, rolled and
tumblei like runaway wagons and carts
in thrOnged city. The guns and the
masses o, the right brigade struck the
second line of Devens before McLeans
front had giv'n way, and, quicker than
it cpuld be told, with all the fury of tn.
widest hail storm, everything, every sort
of organization that lay in the path of
tie mad current of panic stricken men,
had to give way and be broken into flag-
ments.
"My own horse seemed to catch the
fury; he iang, he rose high on his hind
legs and fell over throwing me to the
ground. My aide-de camp, Dessauer,
was struck by shot and killed, and for
few moments was as helpless as any
of the men who were speeding without
arms to the rear. But faith 'ul orderlies
hclpe me to remount.
~ rode quickly to the reserve batteries.
A staff officer of General Hooker, Lieu
tenPnt- Colonel Dickinson, joined me
there; my own staff gathered around
me. was eager to fill the trenches
which Barlow would have held. Busch
beck's second line was ordered to change
front there. His men kept their ranks,
but at first they appeared slow. win
they never get thereP
'Dickinson sail: 'Ch, General, SEQ
those men coming from that hill way off
to the right, and there's the enemy after
them. Fire, oh, fire at them; you may
stop the fiightp
"No, Colonel said, 4 will never
fire on my own menu"
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10
Mark Twain on q Bicycle.

Among the hundreds of enthus astic
wheelmen in Hartford, says letter, are
several clerical gentlemen, one of them
the rector of the Church of the Good
Shepherd, Rev. j. II. Watson, who does
his marketing, visits his parishioners and
performs al his per.mbua .ory duties as
man and minister-,eAccpt perhaps,
attending funerals-upon his bicycle.
Eev. Charles E. Stoweis an expert rider,
and Rev. j. II. Twitchell, pastor of the
Asylum Hill Congregational Church, be-
strides wheel. The la ter does it with
fear and trembling. His friend, Samuel
L. Clemens, better known as Mark Twin,
undertook to ride bicycle at about the
same time that his pastor began, and,
like him, is not happy In the sport. The
teacher of Mr. Clemens during the
first week of his wheeling tells this story
of him:
Mr.. Clemens objected to assuming d
costume suitable to the exercise, and one
day started out to ride wearing a long
linen buster over his clothes. His teacher
gently suggested that it might be incon-
venient. Mr.. Clemens thought not.
The young man feared fall, but Mark
Twain said that he would risk it. They
had not gone four rods from home, how
ever, when he began to revile the flap
ping thing, and in less than ten inmates
the skirt was caught upon the wheel and
carried up into the Y of the machine,
and instantly the author of 'Innocents
Abroad" lay upon his face in the dirt,
with the machine Gathering about his
ears. His companion alighted and ran
to help him. The scope and volume of
vituperation that smoked up through the
spokes of that wheel are said to be I'M
repeatable by persons less gifted in the
language than the victim. He was
rescued from the machine, and crawling
to his feet said with strihed fury, "Wait
a minute" Taking his knife rom his
pocket the amateur wheelman opened it
and with fierce determination cut the
superfuous length from the linen coat
until it took on the semblance of
butchers short frock, and then remount-
ing his machine with the assistance of his
trainer he said: "Now, I'll buy Nor
folk jacket, as should have done be-
fore" Which he did. But he has
never entirely conquered the skittish
wheel.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10

In recent lectur before the ROYAL
Dublin Soci ty, rofesSor Arnold sa d ::
There is no way in which fertilization
can be so promoted as by dairy farming.
Butter takes nothing from the soil that
affects its fertilization in the way that
wheat and other Gro do. When the set
Element of the United States began on
the coast of the Atlantic it was for Il long
time stru ygle for life, and the success
slve raising of crops resulted in the OK
haustion OF the land. Now the n cessity
has been for ed upon them of refert IL
2ing the land by means of dairying.
The growth of the art has been of late
years cry mar ed, and from sma be-
ginnings America has now 1 800, 900
mich cows, 100000 of which are
employed in making butter and 1000
OOO in the making of cheese. The idea
exists in the Stats that if they can only
make the butter fine enough they may
double the price. This is to come extent
a mistake. For fancy b tter, called e 1t
edged, high prices are paid, but while
care should be taken that tbI 1u ter
should be as nearly perfect ~ possible,
the effort should rather be in che direc-
ton of re lucing cost
TIE first pc mt is to select animals that
will convert food irto milk at the least
expen e. Peef making and milk max ng
cannot go together. Farmers could no
more do this than they can get race
horse and a draught horse in the same
anim1l. The general purpose COW is not
profitable, and it does not pay to detract
from the m Tx producer to put on beef.
Cows are often uncqualy fed. Those
who produce butter at less cost do it
chiefly on ensilage, which may be used
nearly all the year round, from early in
the ia unit | late in the spring. In the
middle of summer it is gcneialy not en-
ployed.
The control of the animal is one of
the most productive sources of milk. An
efficient source of utilizing food is to give
the cows their food warm and to give
them their water warm. Giving cows
their water at temperature of 10 degrees
to so degrees is found to make a differ
ence of twenty to twenty five per cent.
in thu production, without decreasing of
the milk or the butter Another great
change in profitable dairyiug is to unite
the efforts of dairymen and work to.
gether. By the aid of the creamery
movement three persons in a factory will
do with the aid of machinery VIII It would
take fifty persons indepcn lently to ac-
complish. Again the buyer knows when
he has tested one sample at the factory
that he has learned the quality of the
whole Tins, beside reduction in the
cost, dairym n increase values. Profess
sor Arnold empha lied the important g
of having technical instruction in the
art of manufacture.
1t is an easy m ter to increase the
Te'Centu3e of wa in milk by giving
the COWS certain kinds of food, and there
are some breeds of cows that give milk
containing more dry solids than that oil
other breeds.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10
VEGETABLE ROMANCE.

A potato went out on smash
And sought an onion bed;
That's pie for me!n observed the squash
And all the beets turned red;
"Go wayl" the onion weeping cried
"Your love l cannot be,
The pumpkin be your lawful bride,
You cantelope with me-"
But onward still the tuber came
And lay down at her feet;
You caulihower by any name
And it will smell as wheat;
And /, too, n an early rose,
And you I've come to see,
So don't t1rnip your lovely nose,
But Spinach at with me.
! do not care at all to wed,
So go, sir, if you please!
The modest onion meekly said,
And lettuce pray have Teas;
So think that you have never seen
Myself or smelled my sigh;
Too long a maiden 1 have been
For favors in your rye.
All! spare cress, the tuter prayed;
My cherry-shed bride you'll be,
You are the only weeping maid
That's currant now with me!
And as the willy tuber spoke,
He caught her by surprise,
And, giving her an arti, hoke,
Deyoured her with his eyes.
Nancy Nelson Pendle'on.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10
Remedy for Lung Diseases,

DR.. Robt. Newton, late President of the Ec-
lectic College, of the City of New York, and
formerly of Cincinnati, Ohio, used DR.. WIN.
HALLS BAIsAM very extensively in his prac-
tice, as many of his patients, now living and
restored to health by the use of this invalua-
bic medicine can amply testify. He always
said that so good remedy ought not to be con-
sidered merely as patent medicine, but that
it ought to be prescribed freely by every physi-
clan as a sovereign remedy in all cases Of
Lung diseases. Itcures consumption and all
pectoral complaints.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10


Those who suffer from disorder or inaction
OF the liver will never get the upper hand of
the unruly organ SO long rs they use such IRA
tional remedies as blue pill, calomel and po-
dophyllin. But from the tried and popular
medicine, Hostetter's Stomach Bitters, they
may expect relief with certainty of obtain
great hillary gland is direct powerful and
speedily felt. The relief afforded is not spas.
modic, but complete and permanent The
sallowness of the skin, furred appearance of
the tongue, indigestion, co ,tiveness, headache,
nausea, pains through the right side and
shoulder, in fact every accompaniment of the
obstinate complaint are entirely and promptly
removed by course of this inestimabie med
tcine, In behalf of which testimony is con-
stantly emanating from every quarter, and
from all classes of society.
Gray hair, however caused Is restored to Its
original colo T b. Halls's Ii air Remover.
Persons suffering from Aguc of long
standing will find a specific in Ayers ague Cure
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10
Perfectly Safe.

"Will it be safe for me to go on this
boat9' inquired timd and somewhat
portly old lady, as she was preparing to
board an excursion steamer.
ooh, yes, that's all right" said the
man who was taking tickets. "a
couple of hundred pounds, more or
less, amt going to sink her, She's fully
insured, anyhow. Step right aboard. ~
Merchant Iruge'er.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10

Mensman's PeptOnized Beef Tonic, the only
preparation of beef containing its entire nutri-
tioiS properties. 1t contains matchmaking
force generating and life sustaining properties;
invaluable for Indigestion, dyspepsia, nervous
also, in all tnfeebled conditions, whether the
result of exhaustion, nervous prostratiOn, over
work or acute disease, particularly il resulting
from pulmonary complaint Caswoll, Hazard &
90, Proprietors, New York. Sold by druggists.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10
Important TO Merchant TaiIor-.

~ NJ Won Keller & Co., successors to Keller q
William SITS, New York city, are doing an ex-
tenslye business by means Of furnishing to the
Merchant Tailoring trade throughout the Uni
Their Woolens in season, and receiving and
executing orders received through the sam
pies. Whenever style has been sold out,
.hey hotlly thelr Gust omers to that erect, SO
WAYS properly informed as TO WHICH styles
hey can offer to their patrons. The Merchant
Tailor IS thus placed in u position to show a
large variety OF styles without encumbering
himself with large stock. We und erstand
that any Merchant Tailor desiring such collec-
lon OF samples can have same sent free of
charge. Address Messrs NJ. Won Keller & Co.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10
II Might Have Been Worse.

First Spinster-How horrible in that
Crawford girl! She said l was looking
miserably. She doesn't know the first
principles of politcneSs.
Second Spinster - That was better
than if she had SAID you were looking
old.
"Why so2"
eve can recover from illness, but
from old age never. philadelphia Call.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10

The farmers, in their swamps we're sure,
Could fluid the roots and plants that curei
II by their knowledge they only knew
For just the disease each one grew.
Take courage now and "Swamp-Root" try
flor kidney, LIVER and bladder complaints),
As on this remedy you can rely,
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10

In addition to The above are many
other business edifices of large cost; and
then there are the great apartment houses
up town, n number of which each cost
more than million. - Troy Tines.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10

New York ty every year appIopriates
$4,000 for the relief of the blind poo. a list
of blind resi- tents is kept and card sent to
them VIII n an appropriation is made, they go
to the Office o. the superin endent of outdoor
roOr and receive the I money.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10
FEDERAL Losses at Gettysburg.

The losses of the Federal troops at
Gettysburg, according to ofcial data
recently issued in pamphlet form by the
War DEPARTING we're as follows:
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10

The most astonishtngIy beneficial results
have followed the use OF Red Star Cough Cure
by those affected with throat and lung
troubles Price. tMent Y-fiYe cents.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10

A huge derrlck-po'e fell and severely injured
the foot of Mechanical Engineer E. r. Hoyt
at the New Orleans Exposition, and after
only three applications of st. Jacobs Oh, all
the pain and swelling disappeared.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10

No Opium in Pisos Cure for Consumptio n
Cures Where other remedie fail. 25c.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10

ANY man looks like sloven with turnover
heels. Lyons Heel Siffeners keep boots
straight. csc.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10

The more able man is, if he makes
i'll use of his abilities, the more danger,
Gus he is to the community.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10

Wheat is the only crop which can b,
produced in Southern California without
irrigation.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10

The Peanut Club is large sec al orra1iza
ton in New York. Tie badge Of memb rs Is
a peanut, and it must b. worn on every occa
sion in metal ieweIy, or carved wood.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10
ARREST SUMMER COMPLAINTS

, Prepared With the utmost skill from imported
Ginger. Choice Anomalies and the purest and best
of Medicinal Fl encl Brandy.
As heathful summer drink, with water, milk
iced water lemonade, etrervescent draughts and
mineral water, 1t is the best.
1t eradicates craving for intoxicants In those
addicted to their use, allays nervousness, assists
digestion, promotes sleep, and builds up those re
duced by disease, debility and dissipation
Mothers worn out with the cares OF maternity "
the household. or when weak, nervous and hyster-
lcal, should take dose Of that delicious invigor
att SASFoRD'S GISoEr. No other remedy Is SO
wholesome. palatable, and sale for del'ehte women
young children, and the aged.
Beware of worthless "gingers," extensively urged
by inercenary druggists Oh those VINO call for
| SANFORD'S CLING Err,
Sold by Druggists, GrOcers and Dealers.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10
Some Costly New York Buildings.

The cost of some Of the big bull lings
which now so often attract attention
in New York may be given thus:
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10

E glish is to be taught in the common
schools of Japan
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10

Many delicious fruits and vegetables are tabooed
by thousands who fear to eat them becau. some
one has pronounced them injurious.
What more appetzing hot day than freshly
sliced cucumber, hard cold, crisp temptingy
served on cracked ice2
Or what more refreshing to the lrrltated and
parched mucous system sultry day than a
cold ripe, luscious black eyed watermelon?
And that all may enjoy them, well as all other
vegetables and fruits in their season, we affirm
that SASFoRD's GIIGER is sure to arrest every
disturbance Of tho bowels, instantly relieves cramps
and pains, prevent indigestion, destroy disease
germs In water drunk, and ward OH malarial,
epidemic and contagious influences.
Avoid cheap and dangerous limitations said to be
''ss good" or our own" or the same" as
SANFORD'S GINGER,
Tho DeIicioua Summer Medicine.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1886-09-10

There are 10000 houses in Berlin in
each of which from twenty to thirty
families reside.
The central Presbyterian. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1856-1908, 1886-10-27

forced with sweet attr sctiveness upon
the mind and heart-Christian at Work.
The central Presbyterian. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1856-1908, 1886-10-27
The Dime Novel.

The dry-rot of modern civilization is
the dime novel and the two-cent story
In Paris, for example, the press is IL
tensely active in printing the vilest kind
of short stories, which are exposed and
pushed for sale at every newsstand for
the trihe Of a sou or two each. And
what scenes these stories unfold They
depict crimes of the worst description,
often suggesting incentives to wickedness
and the means to indulge in it. Female
virtue is secuted and ridiculed the most
indecent practices are excused under the
plea OF necessity marriage is treated as
a freelove contract; family purity and
unity are regarded as unnecessary and
obsolete; success is portrayed as the legi.
innate reward of fraud, trickery, misre.
presentation and manifold forms of dis.
honesty and the very ideals Of manhood,
and truth, and nobility, are utterly per.
verted. This cheap literature is the
fearful curse of France to-day 1t denies
the Immortality of the soul, and defies
the claims of God-since in it's view
there is neither any God nor any other
tribunal to which the soul must give an
account of it's thoughts and actions. Now
while this Infamous fiction shocks the
pious mind much as venomous snake
would the nerves Of delicate, sensitive
lady, yet it is hailed by the masses Of
Paris as one of their chief sources of re-
creation and Joy. Here is the appalling
danger Of modern French society. As
the Indian serpent charmer loves to wind
the shiny folds of the reptile around his
arms and neck, 80 the young generation
of the worlds gay capital OF fashion and
pleasure delight to revel in the unclean
pictures and sensations awakened by this
Satanic press Nor is our own country
free from the same kind of peril. It
must be met not by undiscriminating
censorship, but by such an indoctrination
OF morals and such persistent and win.
some portrayals of another and better
way that boys and girls shall turn from
contamination with ansinstinctive and
natural revulsion. Righteousness in the
family, taught by the carefully inculcated
precepts of the Bible, and exemphfed in
the characters of parents is the only
remedy. After all the love Of Christ Is
the one and sovereign antidote to sin, but
to apply this antidote Christ must be en-
The central Presbyterian. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1856-1908, 1886-10-27
The Arabian Jews.

Baron Bella Racosky, sent by the en-
peror of Austria to the sultan OF Zanzi-
bar, improved the opportunity to visit
Yemen, and paid particular attention to
the position OF the Arabian Jews. The
first city which he visited after he left
Alden was Dalai, about four days from
the English colony. The city is divided
into two quarters, one inhabited by
Mohammedans, the other by Jews. The
latter are blacksmiths, masons, jewellers,
saddlers, shoemakers, etc. Their products
IN leather are excellent, and the Arabians
admit that they could not exist without
the Jews. Baron Racosky was highly
surprised at their industrial activity.
They work SO diligently that he never
noticed smile on their faces. They are
very conscientious and observe the Sab.
bath, stopping work on Friday noon.
They would not let him see their holy
books, but he feels assured that the Jews
OF Dalai possess manuscripts of high
value for the Biblical and Talmudical
literature. In Jerim, four days journey
from Dalai, he found Jews under similar
circumstances. He was not allowed to
converse with them, as it was feared that
Austria wishes to befriend them for colo
nlElng purposes.