Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-12-25
BRIGHT BITS.

-CoNDVCTOH toi fuilman sleeper 70 porter!
tou want 10 watch that passenger sam,
mink he's crazy. Porter-Wnat makes y3"
tnlhk So bossF Conuuctor-Because ne
tdn,t insist upon having lower Dertn IN the
'hludle OF the car.--NeO for6 sun
FIRST M1NIsTER-Dear brother how do you
account for the fact that truthful men are
9carcef IMAM they used TO per
oecond Mlhlstcf-W ell, 1 don KNOW, uh-
ess Is Is lecause there is more hshhg no"
man lormer Iy.-Ar6ansd~ ITdoeIe'.
~ sEE.D said Brown. "that thew now SAY
that beef tea ia wort hie.s as an article Of food
s;ut. for ali that. IL was The only thing that
saved nv life when mad the feyer.U Fopg:
Yes: but how does that prove that beef tea
is not worthless 2',- H0ston Tynnscri3ot
A REPORT comes from small town in Mis-
-ouri that an Aldermen of the Mace ia living
IN trance. This is not as gratifying as the
report from New York that several Aldermen
are lying in a iail but il serves to clinch the
popular belief that wherever an Alderman
NAV be he will lle.-Chicq13 Neqos,
-
foAPoUS YOUNG LAWYER lto prlsoner)-h AS
you nave no counsel 1he court mas oeputed
me 10 uelenu you:
Prlsoner-Am dat So
aoung lawyer es.
va, bonab. an, frows m vseif on de- meScv III
de court r. stnps Traasc~iyt. w
-
st. PErER-1es, 1t is necessary TO take Gull
aure INTO consideration Wnen making sub
ilvlslons.
Apolicant-Well, I'm glad of that; because
On eartn i was one OF the chicago literau
81. feCer-An! see; wen, youH nnu your
place on Chere 10 the lett.
Apphcant-ls there any slgn on the gate?
81. teter-1es; Urinary school .-Ond ana
Wortd.
Fannie with interestl--W what Connt .
ion't know. What do Won mean
Maude- Neither do /: only / heard papa
,ay something about Congress having put the
GltcCoral count In good shape
fanniG f. tne arst neard OF IL.
Tonder IL mes nicer 90 so nope we VIII meet
nm in society this winter. It's dreadfully
,uIl Without the nobllty.-- WdshtHgton Crt-
tic.
A MINISTER with rather f1orid complexion
went into The shop of a barber. one of his mar
i. hioners tn he shaved Tho harher vvas cd
dinted TO drinTing after which his bonJ S' ,pas
N consequence. Unsteady at his work In
,havinr the minister he inflicted a cut suflf-
GENTLY deep to cover the lever part of his
lace with blood. The minister turned to the
barber and said. in a lone Of solemn severit,.
..You see. Thomas, what comes of taxing loo
much drink - "Ave.D replied Thomas. with
the utmost composure Sit makes the skin
very tender."- Ie.ods SHttngS.
~ WISH you'd make me an old-fashioned
nun of coffeeo he said as he sst down in -
Detroit restaurant the other dav.
about thirty vears ago. 1 suppoeey
"Yes.v
In few minutes a cup was placed before
him and he surveyed it. shifted at in and
tnrned mn his nose and asked: " "NN'
What do Won call ItP,
IAN old fashioned cum of coffee sir sucb
as onr mothers used to make. cot some Rio
burned il on the shovel. uounded II in n rae
and n IA sweetened with molasses and dosed
with skinned milk. Those GOOD old times
are gone. sir. but the good old-fashioned cot
Fee % n he made vet -, Dst,oit 800 b. wa
'''''
MADAM, said red-nosed tramp grandiO-
quently, TO AIRS. Sarcastlcus, when starv-
ing man asks Tor loaf would you give him a
stoneP