Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1886-09-02

thought that they needed president
and secretary. Railroad Smith argued
that treasurer was necessary indi-
vidual to have around. Dynamite Nc
Granular favored the idea of having
chaplain or some one to look after the
spiritual affairs of the club. Flour &
Feed Eastman echoed Dynamite Nc
Granahan's sentiments in relation to a
spiritual director. Shakespeare Gard
ner thought that they had omitted to
say anything about very important
office, that of butler. All agreed that
butler would be very necessary man
to have around. Gee Henry Gratiot
moved that the chair appoint commit
tee of three to draw up list of officers
that We're necessary, and to present it
to the meeting. The motion was Sec
onded and carried. The chair appoint
ed Shelled Corn Patterson, Yard Stick
Schambo and Dynamite McGranahan.
The committee retired to one corner of
the room. prepared list and came
back and reported.
In their report they set forth that it
was necessary to have a president, vice.
president. secretary, treasurer, chap
lain. butler, keeper of the seal, chief
initiators, leaders of the choir, and out
side guard. The report of the commit
tee was adopted without opposition and
they proceeded to elect the officers at
once. Bulls Eye Henry nominated
Shakespeare Gardner for president for
he said, he is man of great strength
and well known bravery and would bo
able to maintain ORDER Shakespeare
Gardner was elected ON the first ballot
General Bolte proposed the name of
Slaughter House Kruse for vice presi-
dent. He said that he was butcher
and was good hand to quiet unruly
cattle and for that reason, should the
matter OF Shakespeare Gardner fall
upon his shoulders, would make very
efficient officer. Slaughter House Kruse
was declared the unanimous choice of
the meeting for the office of vice presi-
dent. Railroad Smith was elected Sec
rotary and Shelled Corn Patterson
treasurer.
When the Office of chaplain was
reached, Flour & Feed Eastman arose,
and said that he would beg leave to
present the name of Dynamite Nc
Granular for that Office. Said he,
dynamite McGranahan of all our
brothers is most fitted to grace the altar
of our Slippery Elm Club. Well do we
know the gentleman's rare ability as
theologian. His condition in all mat
tiers appertaining to spiritual affairs,
has long been the wonder of an I'M
grateful people. Besides his exuber-
ance of piety, he has had experience
that will prove invaluable to him as a
director of our spiritual affairs. For
number of years he has worked in
Frank Newton's powder mills. Twice,
yea thrice, has he been blown up sky
high when the mills have exploded.
He has almost seen into the unexplored
territory. His breath has been laden
with the fire and sulphur that is said to
be an important factor in the sweet bye
and bye. He has long been member
in good standing in the Hook and Lad
der company, and on more than one
occasion has shown an utter regardless
ness of danger that has made many
members bottle-green with envy. In
view of all these things, say let
us have him for our chaplain. Let US
do this repeat and the name of Dy-
Mantle McGranahan will go laundering
down the centuries alongside of Wesley
and Luther"
The eloquence of Flour g. Feed East
man held the brethren spell bound, as it
were, and when he had finished, Dy-
Mantle McGranahan was declared elect
ed chaplain. General Bolte was elected
butler and Pewter Fawcett keeper of
the seal. Bulls Eye Henry was elected
outside guard. He was considered the
best marksman in the society and it
was supposed that he would be able to
keep the coast clear of all interlopers.
Flour & Feed Eastman was next elected
leader of the choir, and brother Muir
ply, Peck. Schambo, Gratiot and Baker
chief initiators.
Shelled Corn Patterson moved that a
committee of three be appointed TO
draw up a constitution and bylaws for
the club. The motion prevailed and
Salvation Murphy appointed Quill
Driver Peck, Gee Henry Gratiot and
Flour & Feed Eastman as such commit
tee. Railroad Smith moved that each
of the new officers come prepared to
make speech of acceptance at the
next regular meeting. The motion re-
ceived second and was carried. Flour
& Feed Eastman led the brethren in
singing. "Come, ye Disconsolate,"
after which the meeting was declared
adjourn ed for one week.
(To be COntinued.)