Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-07-22
BRIGHT BITS.

81 SAY, jack, have you heard about the
contlagrationf" "No; what con11agration"'
why, the faculty have fred snodklns."-
Harvard EdDtpooN.
MI R; FITzPERCY has great deal Of sang
well, now" replied Mrs, Snaggs, II didn't
know he ever sang at all ."-TId-B
HON HENRY WATTERsoN went abroad for
MS health. His letters snow that he Is rap
Idly recovering it. A disposition 10 soold ls a
sure sign Of convalescence.-E1c
A LITTLE York girl, while hsplng her
childish prayer AT her mothers knee before
retiring, stopped in the midst of her devotions
and sand: 80, Lord, please wait minute
until | scratch my toe. J. Fork tPa.) Netos.
CoNTRIBUToR-You 'H like the sketch, am
sure. You see, it is written only upon one
side of the pages.
Editor-Yes. That, after all, is the only es-
sential Merit is of no account.
Contributor with starel-Eh? Well, put
1t to the best use you see fit.
EdtOr-Oh, thanks! IN write editorials on
the other side.-J0u1ndJist.
BAGLEY-Did you enjoy yourself at the
clambake?
Balley--Indeed did.
Bagley-I suppose the clans made good
eating.
Baltey-I don't know about that; didn't
wait. You see, they couldn't get the fire to
burn, so we disposed of the liquids ana came
home. can enjoy clambake every day in
the week. Tia Bits.
"HAvE you ever noticed" saws a philoso-
pher in the Washington Critic, that if a car
driver has holiday, or day off, as they say
at the stables he VIII do nothing on that day
but ride up and down the roet and talk shop
all day to the driver, ana he Is one OF the first
to board an early car? OR give a night watch
man a night off, and as as fate he will
20 and sit up all night, smoke and chat with
the Waterman on duty and say next day with
dlgntned arr: Il was not ON last night ="
Nm Lot sf.~ I
asked Verdi for letter of introduction to
| kossIni, which was given. The author OF
NV lillian Tell" received the able in he most
| friendly manner, and asked him to play one
| of his compositions or any other fayorite
| piece. Liszt sat at the piano and thumped
| until exhausted. "What is that?' asked Ros-
| sum. "A funeral march 1 composed on the
| death of heyer6eer. What do you think of
| 1t, MaestrO?" Not bad. Only 1t would have
been much better had you died and Meyer
beer written the music. "-Pdrts Letter.
SOCIETY NoTE.-Miss Esmeraida Long
| coffin Is in reality about As years of age and
has an unhealthy look. The Lougcoffin man.
! sion is just now undergoing repairs. Meeting
| KoscluskO Murphy Miss Esmera da remarked
Our house Is being painted ali over and put
in repairs. Everything in the'house is going
| to be made over"
"EverythingP' asked Murphy.
"f es, everything IN the house Is going to be
improved"
! Miss Esmeralda, allow me to congratulate
|
hands and shaking them warmly.-Iegas Sift-
| i10s.
1--WE are sorry to announce" says the Arb
iona Howler, that our scientific exploring
| expedition has met with temporary backset.
! IL had Just got ready to let a boy down into
the hole behind One Eyed Jake's saloon, W hen
that dispenser of bug juice came out with a
! shotgun. and warned the eminent scientists
! of. And as he had the drop on them, they
were obliged to go. One Eyed Jake tells a
cock anu bull story to the effect that he stores
some OF his choicest liquors in that hoe. and
ne mas the enrontery to say that we got up the
expedition for the purpose of stealing these
liquors. OF course Tins ia q base lie, as we
organized the expedition in the interests of
pure science, without hope of any reward eX-
cept an approving conscience. But even a
worm Will turn, and we hereby inform the
caitlf editor of the Paralyzer that his unholy
glee over this affair Will be shortlived, as our
scientific expedition is still organized, and
will soon make big scientific scoop for tho
IIowler."