The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1886-03-13
A GAS-PIPE ROMANCE.
Why "Teddy Jones" Is "Set
Against" Literary People.

Literary people! Faugh! don't speal,
of them. If there's any thing detest more
than another, it's a man or woman who
writes"
looked at my friend Teddy Jones and
smiled. What in the world could have
caused this outbust against the fraternity
TO which it was the height of my ambition
to belongl-and from jones'
Jones and literary people! What could
be more absurds Fancy It'll Jones and
men and women who spend their time
reading Emerson, wondering at Carlvle's
''immensities' and "eternities, 7" and asking
how far George Eliot really went in her
following of Comte The idea was so pre-
pOsterous!
But must introduce Teddy Jones He
was in the dry-goods trade. Originally he
had been what people call counter
jumper Now he was the principal buyer
OF one of our largest dry-goods "empori-
umS." q quote Ted in using the word; il
was big and imposing and delighted him
But as for reading-certainly he had never
read anything but newspaper since | had
known him. His conversation-and he
was as garrulous as Tennyson's brook go
ing on forever and forever, until some
strong force usually reprimand from
his wife) stopped him-was always shout
one of three things, his business, the next
election, and what was going on at the
theaters. What could Jones know about
literary people! Where had he ever met
any such, and what could he have had to
do with them3 [ was anxious to know,
and the only way to crafty my curiosity
was to ask. l did ask. The first answer
got was suppressed litter from Mrs.
Jones.
ooh he'll tell the story fast enough, - said
Ted's loving spouse, 'if you'll only listen"
Let's have the story by all MEANS"
cried, IF there is onen
Jones looked half pleased half mortified.
Evidently there were features to the story
which disinclined him to its relation. Yet
between his own fondness for talking, his
wife's urging, and my evident interest in
what he had to tell, there seemed to be no
escape for him. After a little more parley-
ing we both took cigars, and he began:
You see, Bradford, was brought up to
trade''-as if every cubic inch of his body
line of his face, the set of his collar and
the fit of his trousers had not borne testi-
mony to that fact from the beginning
Never in the course of my life did have
anything to do with people who live by
t1eir wits take it, which means stealing,
by their imaginations, which l have
since found out means writing, until had
got married and come to town to live.
You must know that at that time l was
not as well off as l am now. Eliza and T.
"a theatrical gesture of Ted's, right arm
toward Mrs. Jones assured me that she was
the Eliza alluded toy ''were obliged to live
in a clearinghouse.
1.-THE mansion in which we sought refuge
was kept by a Mrs. Smith, and we arrived
at her establishment one evening just in
time for dinner.
"When we stepped into the dining-room
we saw a long table with about a dozen
people ranged around it. First came Mr.
and Mrs. James Sterling, two sons and a
daughter-Of no interest whatever Then
there were two young men, clerks in q
nnipbhO1inCr I1.11 OF bo To- t truO
utterly unimportant. But at the left hand
of one of them sat young lady"
AT this point Ted glanced at Mrs Jones'
But apparently that bright little woman
had no idea of being jealous. She smiled
back at her husband.
"Well, Bradford, if ever saw beauti-
full woman, there was one. You know
am a Judge of women.n
thought of Jones experience behind the
counter, and assented.
''Such blue eyes! Such a head of golden
hairm (Another sUrreptitious glance at
Mrs. Jones) "Well, l won't go on. She
was just the very model of that woman
with the baby up in your room"
o dear! oh dear! That was the way in
which Jones alluded to my photograph of
RaphaePs Madonna del Granduca
''rhe very moment looked ather began
to think of angels. But did not dare look
long, for there, right at her elbow. sat the
most hideous old woman you ever saw in
your life. How could it be! Was that
dreadful old woman the mother of that
beautiful grl2 She was. Our landlady
introduced us to Mrs. Marvin and her
daughter, Miss Emily Marvin. OH how
beautiful Miss Emily was when she lifted
her eyes l actually felt my heart go pit
a-Pat"
this did not disturb her.
"Well we had not sat at that table long
before began to feel that we were in an
atmosphere of romance. At our landladY S
left hand and just about as far from Miss
Emily as he could be put, sat young man.
BE was a handsome fellow, too. His eyes
and hair were dark. and he had a strong,
solid look, as if he had been brought up in
the country. He was just the kind of man
I'd sell a bill of goods to and send them
home without any G. o. ID. mark. Om
landlady introduced him as Mr.. William
Graham.
sit did not need a very sharp pair of eyes
TO discover that Mr.. Will Graham was in
love with Miss Emily. Eliza and | botl
understood it fully before the evening wa.
out. When we got to our own room we
talked it over, and we also decided that the
two young people were very unhappy
Eliza said it was because Miss Marvin:
mother was opposed to the match. l haC
not got quite as far as this, but in the courst
Of few days, when had seen consider
ably more of the young couple, felt SURF
she was right.
zone day when l came home from thu
store a little earlier than usual, Eliza sale
TO me, Ted, ] think there is something very
mysterious about Miss Emily
"'What is itp asked.
"'Why, she is always so preoccupied.
spoke to her to-day at lunch, and sh
answered me in such way that felt sur
she didn't know in the least what hat
said. Then she is always so busy Gu
landlady asked her to go out for a littl
walk to-day by way Of recreation, and sh'
made some hurried excuse, saying sh
couldn't go anywhere, she had SO much t.
do
81 told Eliza that women in boarding
houses were always hunting up mysterie
to gossip about. There was probably moth
ing more remarkable about Miss Emily
preoccupation than that she was busy owe
some new dress, and couldn't make tn
over-sllirt fit. But the next night when
calpa home Eliza had a new story.