Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1884-1886, 1886-04-27
THE WIDOWS SECRET.

THE WIDOWS SECRET.
Il don't think that you treat him right,
said the rosy little widow to the dressmakeI
who was fitting her trim figure to sill
gown Of the color OF moon upon the lake,
and at the same time holding her head back
and a trife to one side, lest her tears should
drop thereon. Il don't think women know
how to treat their husbands
You must be expert in the matter re
sponded Mrs FIFTEEN, seeing this is the
fourth time You have tried EN- Hollow in
your back trihe. as is natural to you
there-sets like a dnck's foot In the mud
can't be bettered," she exclaimed, profes-
sionaIly.
Men are good creatures when women
know how to manage them They do seem
to incline more TO some women than to
others"
You never had a drinking husband,
ma'am, suppose.'
BLESS you! no, never l could not abide
the breath A woman ought to be on her
guard
at seems so strange Widowhood seems
natural to some women-they thrive and
grow pretty upon it"
The widow laughed, saying:
Il never gave it a thought, but it may
be So"
Going to be married the fourth time,
Not chick nor child! not forty yet, and as
plump and pretty as everl Upon my word,
nna'am, don't see how you manage"
"Oh, that's a secret
Mrs. FIFTEEN opened her eyes wide, and
slowly repeated:
"A secretl'
Yes, indeed / have found il works ad-
mirably with three husbands, and no doubt
it will work just as well with the fourth"
BLESS my heart" exclaimed the d. x-
maker, dropping the cord she was covering
to put the founce on with, and an i'll dis
guised horror on her face.
-Oh, l didn't kill my three husbands
They were dotingly fond of me to the last,
and left me well provided for"
.Do tell me your secret, ma'am,r and the
expectant, not to say painful hope, bright
ened her wan face.
1T isn't much, Mrs FIFTEEN, and yet it is
a secret, and its application has been, as it
were, disastrous in my case am sure l
never expected it"
Dear me! you seem to own up to some
thing Did they die suddenly, poor crit.
terss"
Quite the contrary; they lived along as
If 10th to go"
Poor crittersi should have thought you
would have felt bad"
Il did, indeed" and the pretty woman
preparing to wed her fourth husband wept
at the memory of the three
do tell me all about it, persisted the
other, with look not sympathetic. Your
tears don't seem TO dim your handsome
eyes"
Il don't know about that-I never
thought about that-but, Mrs FIFTEEN, first
and last, have criei a great DEAL
Perhaps you had a reason unknown to
the world, ma'am- But / want dreadfully
to know how you managed it
Our widow was a sort of Widow Wadley,
easily beguilei TO tears or smiles, and she
began TO perceive that the astute dress
maker had some latent design in thus ques-
tioning her, which she did not object to
crafty. Accordingly she assumed the mar
ratiye form, while the needle of her auditor
clicked against her thimb.e in concert
My first husband, you must know, was
well to-,io, but not rich. He went to church
every Sunday. and dropped - cents each
into the contribution boN-nevc more or
less | knit him stockings and made him
shirts: he liked 10 see women industrious
and was industrious We went to lect-
ures, and now and then to a social party
always at home and to bed at 10 O'Clock.
He was agreeable in temper and apt to fall
asleep Slow and automatic in movement
He had a way Of looking into kettles and
jars as if he expected to find them out Of
order: and he did SO find them sometimes-
it YVES a comfort to him He read all my
letters, he lied it He poked over my
bureau drawers, and saw all my gloves and
laoes ia such a mess-and in the mildest
way epiimanded NE. This was comfort
to him also He had not fault; he had
not ice; he had not an inordinate desire
/ wished he had"
You wicked woman calculated the
dressmaler. You didn't know whea you
We're wei OF.
Il know til know i'll didn't somehow
grow gooi with such a man as l ought TO
have done, but when he was gone saw it
all, and almost c.ied my eyes out You see
a man is a good thing to have around the
house, 10 lock the doors and look after
things When a woman is once used to hav-
ing one around she is sure to feel lonesome
and out of sorts when he is gone | learned
to think a dull husband by no means unde-
sirable as husband. Vow the second hus-
banl | wore my widows weeds the con
ventional period, though several OF the most
ayr, eable men were attentive TO me. but
shut my eyes I managed to keep them
from pro. osing, for | rather liked my free
dom. and somehow three xCellent men. who
la known my excellent husband, were not
TO my mind. l am afraid l hated good
men
The dressmaker groaned
How could you; l am sure such hus-
I and must be beautiful"
That IS true, Mrs FIFTEEN, and he thought
me beautiful. But you must understand he
MAS a model man, and he did his best TO
make me a model woman, but it was not
IN m. We women are naturally perverse
AMI apt to thin our way as good as = mans
way
80 it is, only good deal better NUT
tere the other
/ don't know about that / am apt to
thin man Is wiser about many things
tnan We sre. but, any way, married people
will Quarrel Us a rule, because elch is bent
upon his own way. Now never disputed a
husband-never, never opposed him. But. as
was going TO say, enc Of my admirers was
OF d different Sint. He was bright. dash
ing. higa- spirited and witty. Hsquite took
me by storm Of contrast He was no. a
model maa by any means. but he was intel
hgent, owed boats, ami had a fine taste for
music. lie had mean opinion OF women
In general, and was sometimes furious at
himself for loving me He declared he would
be IA aster in spite Of me, which was quite
unnecessary for | rather liked 70 have a
master rs Saving trouble and responsibility.
l hate disputes and fuses of any kind, and
lie: matters slide in the easiest manner pos
sibler
Il should think you nigh; be little lazy
returned her auditor.
as that the name for it, Well. perhaps l
am He woald get into q fury abou, his
buttons. and because door creaked OF the
coffee was poor, and storm about the house,
and slam doors and kick o.er chains at
which l only said. Softly, softly, dear.
which only made him worse
Il believe you,7 said the dressmaker.
He even called me a devil once, in a sort
Of tender ct, and quoted Shakespeare: Per
ditiou catch my soul. but do love thss!'T
He said would sit perfectly calm on .
husbands coffin while he Snothered
beneath. for what IS . woman to do but be
quiet when big. strong MAJ Is ragins
about nothing. In one Of these spslh he
broke . bl,od vessel On The brain, and IN