The Portland daily press., 1886-05-13
WIT AND WIsDoM

grandfather coming to read his paper found
that he had mslaid his speetacles, and thereupon
declared: s..,,ono aud o.n,t
81 have lost my glasses SOMEWHERE, anu Gan
read the paper" -, -, s;uin =, 70
SsGrandpa, YOU 20 outside and look froo re win
dow, and I'll hold re paper up SO you can re@u
it,"
SCOTS Emulsion of Pure Cod Liver
oil with RypophospFites.-A a remedy
for Consumption, Serofulo, all wasting diseases
and General DEBILITY, we venture to say has no
equal in the whole realm Of medicine.
What should we say to man who could pride
himself upon superior knowledge and philosophy,
and who. entering house, should MAINTAIN that
ii was made by chance, and that art and industry
had done nothing to render II q eolnmodlous hdpl-
tarion for men; and who would eve as I 1ei
that there were caYernS that resemDle lt' WHICH
fine art of man had not made?-Fenelon.
Carriers Little Liver Pills are free from all
crude and irritating matter. Concentrated medl-
cine only; very small; very easy to take; no pam;
no gripping; no purgDg.
The real trouble in the country:
Harold Ito young woman from the country
"And don't you almost die up IN the country rum
Young Woman from the Countryside, don't
think that's what they called t In sY tb raSn ay
people have been dying from the measles Is enough
to make person shudder"
For tventy-four years have been great sur
ferer from infammatory rheumatism Athlopho-
ros is the only medicine have ever found to do
me any good. am 20 years old and wish to tes-
tify to the benefits have received from it. Amos
Gilbert, Fair Haven, ct.
Buxom widow Cat evening partyl-Do you I'M
derstand the language. of flowers, DR.. Crusty?
Dr. Crusty ian old bachelor)-No, na'am
Widow-You don't know if yellow means Jeal-
Dr. Crusty-No, ma'am. Yellow means bilious
ness.
THE SECRET ART OF BEAUTY lies not in cos
meties but is only in pure blood and healthy per-
Torrance of the vital functions, which can be OBJ
tanned by using Burdock Blood Bitters.
mVhat do YOU think of the civil service law?"
asked Mrs. Fangle during an afternoon call on
Mrs. Snaggs. ,,, ,,s,4 ,,,,, .,,ora
"A civil service law! why, ulunb hho" tieAo
was such thing"
eyes, indeed there is"
well pll lust let Bridget know it right away.
She acts as though there was not nothing OF the
kind of existence, and won't STAND IL any loh-
ger"
Scrofulous humors are most troublesome in
spring. Nothing gives so sure relief as Vegetlne
Miss Clara-And so you really think bangs are
Incoming to me, Mr.. Featherly?
Mr.. Featherly-Vastly 50, Miss cara, Vastly SO
Miss Clara-But they are getting so common
Everybody wears them. -,
MI Featherly-Yes, so 1 understand. A fash
ion note | saw in paper recently stated that mar
dealers were scarcely able to supply the demand.
All cases of weak or lame back, backache, rheu-
natism, &c. will find relief by wearing one OF Car
ters Smart Weed Belladonna Backache Plasters'
Price % cents.
At the tea table: .-s
Phasecius-My dear, have suggestion 10 OF
fer
Iayina-Well, what is it, pray?
phasecius-It is that we have theSe DiscullS
adorned with painted decorations of Japanese de-
sign, apply for copyright and get some wnq 4he
sale stationer down town to introduce them 10 Tue
trade as Mikado paper weights. What do you say?
But she was silent.