, 1886-01-31
B~ASSMAGERAN'S BATTERY


wanted to go up, but because 1t was the
unwritten law OF the Conjunctive Bank
building that when Mr.. j. Livingston
Jaggers desired 10 ascend he should have
the elevator all TO himself. Jaggers was
a capitalist and held the heaviest mort
gage on the building. Therefore, when
Jaggers numbered into the hall, the usual
crowd Of business persons and Office boys
who were waiting TO be transported sky
ward were unceremoniously elected from
the car and left TO hurl disparaging com
ments at Jaggers' legs as they disap-
peared from view.
.Jaggers. as has been stated, wa a cap
~italist, no one knew how much he had.
II vas currently reported that he was a
director In thirty eight companies and
president OF thirty-two of them. Every
one OF these corporations was the of
spring of Jaggers; every one had origna-
ted In his fecund brain. There was the
Patagonian Electric Attraction company,
organized to set up electric lights on the
pampas in order to attract wild horses, so
that the animals might be quietly las
seed while staring at the dazzling illuIni-
nation, and subsequently sold to circuses;
the Gymnotus Electrical company, organ
lied to supply electric cells to families,
bach family hhuinR an eel connected with
the bells OF the dwelling-the prospectus
said that -the advantage Of an electric
eel over the usual form Of battery Is man
ifest. inasmuch as electrical batteries
when used up can not be eaten, whereas
cells cam the Electric Pie company,
which furnish various substances not
naturally eatable in the form of pies,
which could be transported ain any
weather and In all climates rs ballast
for ships, but when subjected TO the
action OF electrical currents, yielded new
allotropic compounds not distinguish
able in taste from mince pies; the Electric
Dun Exterminator company, which pro
NOTED a neat contrivance involving a tel
ephone, which would operate only under
the influence OF the words a nave called
to collect that little bill or etc. etc. At
the word bill" the charge OF seventy
large Leyden jars was automatically
switched through the speaker with the
singular effect. as the company's adver-
tisement asserted, "of invariably causing
the most obdurate dun to settle the nc
count out of his own pocket" and finally,
there was the Tooth Brush Electrical
company, which provided tooth brushes
which polished the teeth, sharpened
them. put in new filings, and caused
them to grow by "electro-galvanic nc
ton"
These were merely some OF the corpo-
rations which Mr.. Jaggers had promoted.
~r~hirty-eight 1ourishing concerns, sir"
he was wont TO say TO his intimates,
"thirty-eight companies on bedrock basis
and the stock Of every one OF them at par
and twenty"
Then he would gurgle In an impressive
manner in his thick throat and pull pack
his double chin and carelessly extract n
check or two from the unopened letters
on his desk-there were always unopened
letters with checks In them waiting for
him apparently-and stop for his visitor
to recover from the effect OF this an
nouncement.
On the particular day when the cleva-
tor made its nfty-hrst trip, as stated in
the beginning, just as Mr. Jaggers
stepped into the car, another person en-
deavored to follow him. But this indi-
vidual was promptly showed back, the
door was slammed sharply in his face,
and the elevator in ascending grazed HIS
nose before he could recoll. Quick AS
was the attendant, the stranger found
time. before the elevator was out OF reach
10 thrust into the lattice-work around 1t
"A rather dirty card.
Jaeger saw it-and extracting IL from
between the wires, read 1t. 1t bore the
words:
KvoRK BAssMAGERAN, Wizard.
N. B.-Electrioal things invented to
order.
l92 East Hegira street. Constantinople,
4th fiat.
JaRgers read this over several times
attentively, then put 1t In his pocket,
then too It out and perused 1t again. BY
this time the elevator had reached jag
gers floor and was stationary. The at
tendant respectfully held the door open
but Jaggers stood musing-heedless Of
the yells and excavations rising up the
shaft, by reason OF the elevator not com
ing down.
Finally Jaggers awoke from his re
verie. This was after many steps had
been heard rushing up the stairs below,
these being made by brokers' clerks with
belated deliveries and tempers aggre-
gated to positive nendishness. He
stepped into the corridor-and then
turning handed the ard to the elevator
boy-"Bring that man up" he said
briefly.
The elevator at once started down. this
time pursued by the anathemas Of n man
on the top floor who had been waiting
for It 10 come and get him.
Two hours later Mr.. Kvork Bassmn-
geran emerged from Mr.. Jaggers' Office
with n perplexed expression of counte-
nance, There was no doubt, be II OBJ
served. that Mr.. Bassmageran was "A
genuine Oriental. He wore a greasy,
black coat OF ecclesiastical cut, a dingy
fez, no collRr-nor ostensible shirt-and
exhaled a mild aroma of weak tobacco
aud otto Of roses. AS he stepped into the
elevator, he Rbstractedly rolled a cign-
rette in his fingers, and then seemingly
smoked II without lighting It, evidently
forgetting to do so. Bassmageran's eyes
were black and sharp. The rest OF his
face had about as much expression as a
lump Of yellow fig paste-than which It
was a few shades darker in color. As
the car descended, he sat with his eyes
half closed, evidently thinking deeply.
He remained in the elevator when 1t re
ascended-and, In fact, stayed therein
while II made several trips up and down.
Finally, he rose suddenly and tried TO
walk out while the car was between two
floors, and was abruptly pulled back.
When he reached the lower floor, the
hall porter firmly took him by the arm
and marched him out with the sententi-
Gus information that cranks were not
wanted in the building. Bassmageran
merely looked at him stolidly and slowly
wendell his way up the street. Jaggers'
confidential clerk said that he had no no
tion what the old man and the Turk had
talked about in the inner office. The
conversation had been In whispers. All
the confidential knew was that Jaggers
had directed him to make out a list OF
all the stockholders In all the companies,
who had not at some time beer disagree
able In asking questions or demanding
dividends, and to forward 10 each and
every one Of these persons an identical
note to the effect that Jaggers desired Ia
Deb,Ittnted Men