The Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1868-1895, 1886-04-21
BILL NYE.
The HumOrist Disports Himself I'm Capital
society-He Admires Washington as
a Matrimonial Market.

l have Just returned, writes Bill Ney at
Washington to the Boston Globe, from a po-
lite and recherche party here. Washington
is the hot bed of gayety, and general head
quarters for the recherche business. 1t
would be hard to find bontonger aggrega-
ton than the one | was Just at to use the
words of a gentleman who was there, and
who asked me If / wrote The Heather Chi
nee"
He was a very talented man, with a broad
sweep of skull and tangible yearning lor
something more tangible to drink. He was
in Washington, he sara, in the interest of
Mingo County. forgot to ask him where
Mingo County might be. He took a great
interest in me, and talked with me long after
he really had anything to say. He was one
of those fluent conversationalists frequently
met with in society. He used one of those
web-perfeeting talkers-the kind that can be
fed with raw Roman punch, and that will
turn out punctuated talk IN links like var
nished sausages. Being poor talker myself,
and rather more fluent as q listener, did
not interrupt him.
He said that he was sorry to notice how
young girls and their parents came to Wash
ington as they would 10 a matrimonial mar
ket
was sorry also to hear it. 1t panied me
to know that young ladies should allow
themselves to be bamboozled into matri-
mOny Why was it, asked, that matrimony
should ever single out the young and fair?
"Ah," said he, lit is indeed rough"
He then breathed sigh that shook the
foliage of the speckled geranium near by, and
killed sn artificial caterpillar that hung on
its branches
"Matrimony is all right" said he, eff
properly brought about Ii breeks my heart,
though, TO notice how Washington is used as
a matrimonial market. 1t seems to me al
most as if these here young ladies were
brought here like slaves AMI exposed for
sale" had noticed that they were some
what exposed, but did not know that they
were for sale.
l asked him if the waists of party dresses
had always been so sadly in the minority,
and he said they had.
I danced with beautiful young lady
whose trail had evidently caught in a door
way. She hadn't noticed it until she had
walked partially through her costume. do
not think lady ought TO give too much
thought to her apparel, neither should she
feel too muck above her clothes. l say this
| in the kindest spirit, because believe that
man should be friend to woman. No fam
| lily circle is complete without a woman. She
is like glad landscape to the
weary eye. Individually and col
| lectiyely, woman is great adj
| junct Of civilization and progress. The cleo
| trict light is a good thing, but how pale and
feeble it looks by the light Of good womap's
eyes The telephone is a good invention. 1t
| is good thing to talk at and murmur into
and deposit profanity in, but to take up
conversation and keep it up and follow a
man out through the front door with it, the
telephone has yet much To learn from wo-
man.
1t is said that our Government officials are
not sufficiently paid, and presume that is
the case, so it became necessary to economic
in every way, but why should wives concen-
trate all their economy on the waist of
dress? When chest protectors are so cheap
as they now are, hate to see people suffer,
! walton, and more restitution prevailing the
| Washington scapula and clavicle this winter
\ than / ever saw before. "a 1920 "r '
But do not hope to change this custom,
though spoke TO several ladies about it and