davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
HEALTH FALLAClES.
Popular misconceptions that Ought 10
be OverthroNn.

Popular misconceptions that Ought "a
be Overthrown.
A writer in Lippincott's Magazine
thinks that the health OF the people
would be brought up TO u better condi'
ton if they were educated out of the
following iallacies:
The idea that cold baths are healthy
in Winter and dangerous in mid Sum-
mer.
That rain-water is more wholesome
than "hard' water.
That bedrooms must be heated in cold
weather.
That the misery of everlasting scrub.
bing and soap suds valors is compensat'
ed by the comfort of lucid intervals.
That sick room must be kept her.
metically closed.
That it pays to gave fou air for the
sake of its warmth.
That ''draughts" are morbific agencies
That even in Midsummer children
must he sent TO bed at supset, when the
air begins to be pleasant.
That an after dinner nap can do any
harm.
That the sanitary conditions of the
air can be improved by the ietor OF car
bolic acid.
That there is any benefit in swallow
ing jugfulls Of nauseous sulphur water.
That rest after dinner can be shorten
ed with impunity.
That outdoor recreation is waste of
time.
That athletic sports brutalize the char
cter.
That a normal human being reqiiree
any other stimulant than exercise III IN s
fresh air.
That any plan Of study can justify the
custom of stiniinP children in steep.
That the torpor Of narcotism is prefera-
BILE to insomnia.
That the suppression of harmless re-
creation will tail tc beget vice and hyp'
ocrisy.
That stimulation is identical with in
vigoration.
That fashion has right to enforce the
wearing of wcolen clothes IN the dog
days.
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
JUST A LIVING.
How Some Of the People in This Vast
World Exc Out Subsistence.

How Some Of the People in This Vast
World Exc Out q Subsistence.
"Well, we manage to live, and that's
about all, Pop" said peddler of penny
priced songs to New York Telegram
reporter. The peddler had under his
arm 200 copies OF songs. A varied lot,
indt ed, they were. There were some
favorite melodies, written by an amateur
OF the genius who composed the beaut-
full ballads that Nine. Nilsson warbles on
the stage, and a majority were such as
please the patrons of Bowery theatre
picture gallery or cheap dive.
~ cleared 81 in Newark Yesterday
said the song peddIer, 81 sell some of
these songs for cent, some for cents.
In Newark yesterday sold lots of songs
for a dime each and in some places /
got quarter. sees a nice young feller
with his gal promenadin' the avenue.
Says |: Nice songs, Jerry Jones' Ode
to His Old Love, Patsy Birds Sweet
Lullaby l sizes up my customers. The
girl smiles. He takes couple of songs
and hands me quarter. He don't wait
for change. Oh, knows how to work
the racket"
An old man, an ex-freman and sol.
dier in the Mexican war, whose long
gray beard makes him look venerable;
may be seen at midday on Nassau str eet
nearly every day in the week. He car
ries basket and sells shoe blacking.
The old man earns from 81 to $l.50 per
day. He is a veritable Yankee and
manages to keep over half dollar "for
stock" every DAY. His earnings 90 chief
ly for run. If he can get all the drink
he wants he is satisfied to get 15.cent
lodging. Another old man Of atriarchal
appearance visits residences on the east
and west sides, ingratiates himself into
the favor of the women folks and OBJ
tains an order for a window curtain, a
tablecloth or a dress pattern. He was
once clerk in dry goods store OH
Broadway; later owned one and did a
prosperous business. Rum brought him
down. Another sells combs, another
neckties. They patronize the cheap sa-
looms, eat free lunches and sleep in cheap
lodging houses. majority of them are
poor--very poor, ofen hungry, and too
frequently drunk.
Half of our patrons are peddlers,"
said the keeper of cheap lodging house
in Bleecker street to a reporter. "They
make money, but spend it as fast as they
make it. They never prosper. l tell
you, sir, think what you please, no man
can ever prosper who stops in cheap
lodging place. l never did. once kept
books in - & Co.'s, on Broadway, and
got my 5000 year. Now Pm clerking
in this place fo- SO week-and devilish
glad to gel it. sleep in l5-cent bunk
and-well, I'm broken down now, but
grateful"
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
A Case Of SQuelch,

A Chicago drummer balanced his chir
on the edge of the seat in front of him
and tickled sandy-haired passenger:
ear with the remark:
you've been in Chicago, of course?'
"Wherew
Chicago"
An uncertain lvok came into the sandy
haired mans eyes.
'Let me see!" he mused, retrospective
ly; spears to rue must have passed
through there. I've travelled good deal
! know I've heard the name before
What line of read is it on?'
Forty lines of road. Its the biggest
railroad cealcr on earth"
"Nut biegcr'n Crestline, O., is it?" ask
ed the passenger with an amazed ex.
prsSsion. 1--WE seen four traius to opct
at Crcslllne waitin' to start off. Tall
about noise.and corfasion!'
The Chicago mans teeth began to
chatter.
lis Chicago the place where the trains
stop for dinner
Na~," saiA the dias,sted drummer.
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
Cnriosities Of Rock salt.

There is vast bed of rock salt in the
Colorado desert, near Idaho. The South
crn Pacific railroad in laying the track
to the salt mine has been obliged 70
g1adc the road for 200 feet with blocks
OF these beautiful Jumps of salt crystals.
This is the first instance of a railroad
road-bed being laid and balIasted on SAT-
The sea that once rolled over this place
dried up, andlef vast bed Of salt abou'
fifty miles in length. The quality =
superb in exhaustible. Gr1sehoppers 9
enora Gus size and giant csntipedes hsw
been picked In this chloride OF sodiu.s
and are today, alter the lspse Of centu!s3
in fal! sise and periectioa Of shape. Csr
cago Herald. 4
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
The American Handbag in Paris.

Why will American ladies'. asks the
Paris Gazette, persist in carrying small
handbags whenever they go out shop
ping or promenading in Paris? Mt only
are those satcheIs ugly in themselves
and practically useless, but as they are
never carried in Paris save by the fe-
males who practice the calling of mani
cure or predicure. the American lady
tourist is apt to be taken for one of those
personages. A young American lady
was taking walk in the Champs Fly
sees with Partisan lady,friend sometime
ago. She met one of her newly arrived
countrywomen. satohel in hand, as usual
and stopped to speak TO her. Meanwhile
the Parisienae stood aloof surveying the
pair with look of surprise. my dear,
quoth the French lady when the colo.
guy was ended and she and her friend
had resumed their promenade, edo ladies
in society receive that sort of people in
The United States? That is being demo
cratic indeed" Explain yourself,
responded the American. "Was moi
that person with whom you were speak
ing Just uow a manicure? noticed hei
little bag" She was rather amazed at
being told that the person in question
was lady of high standing in America
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
NOTES AND HINTS.

The correspondent of the London
Times takes it upon himself to warn us
against the use of macaroni and other
pastes made in Italy and France, where
cholera has been prevalent. Whatever
the germs of the disease may be, it is al
least possible that they may find these
pastes a very comfortable abode, and
means of transmission to American stom-
achs.
DR.. John ii. GRAY, Medical Superin-
tendent of the Utica Insane Asylum, in
a recent paper on insanity, says that the
over worked business man often become
insane because his distress is kept a
secret until to late for restoration by
mild measures. Rest, change and cheer
ful surroundings at an early stage of de-
preston often prevent melancholia, and
perhaps acute mania.
1t is thought by some that the Phila.
delphia women have better compilations
than those of any other city. Their skin
is as soft and white as a child's. One OF
the local physicians attributes this fact
to the Quaker influence in restraining
the corseting. He reminds us that lacing
compresses the liver, giving rise TO bil-
ious arrangements, and of course, the
latter will discolor the skin.
Dr. Charles A. Teale, in paper on
Asiatic cholera, says that his experience
demonstrates that a person must actually
come in contact with the sufferers with
it or with some clothing worn by them,
in order to contract the disease. When
the disease germs float in the air they
are destroyed, but they can lie dormant
in clothing for a long time and still
communicate the malady to the one who
subsequently handles it.
DIR. Ernest Hart, of London, has, with
much sagacity and indomitable energy
tracked down various epidemics to the
use of impure milk. The milk became
contaminated by the washing of the
milk cans with filthy water, by the
handling of the cans by persons who did
not keep their hands clean, by washing
milk cans with dish cloths used in sick
rooms, the cleansing of the cans in the
same place where the body linen of pa
tients was washed, the contlguity OF
kitchens and sick rooms, ETC., etc. To
impure milk the Doctor has traced in
eleven years fifty epidehics of typhoid
fever, fifteen of scarlet fever and seven
of dlptheria in England alone. DIR
Foote'S Health Monthly.
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
Warranted Not 20 Hun,

will those colors rum" asked Gus.
toner ofa purple aud fine linen trim
med clerk, in Smiths gents furnishing
store, on Fourth street, as he picked up
pretty pair of rainbow socks.
No, sir; they are warranted" replied
the clerk, with an affidavit-lke empha,
sis.
Are you sUre?'
"Of course sir. They are guaranteed
fast colors."
"Oh, they are, are theyT Well, how
the dickens can they be fast. ii they
wont run?"
The clerk pulled show case of the
counter, tryihg to keep from falling.
Cincinnati Merchant Traveller.
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
The Cheapest OF wives.

They were spinning yarns. One old
man sat apart fiom the others and look
ed sad and forlorn. as il he never thought
of lie yity in all his life.
"My wife has been ons of the cheap
est luxures a man ever enjoyed" said
one. 1--WE have been married eighteen
years and she has cost me less than a
thousand dollars all told"
"Poohlr saiI another. ~ have been
married nine years and my wiie's total
expenses have been only $780," The
sad man drew deep sigh and said:
"Well, well. was married forty years
ago, boys, and from that day TO this my
wife has cost me only $l19, and she has
had everything she needed, too"
"How did you get through 70 cheap"
"The pore gal died the second week
after married her."
They spared his life because he was
sad. Through Mail.
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
HIS SHOES ARE THIRTY-FIvEs.
A Colored Minister Whose Foot II
Something Colossal.


Something Colossal.
Business men are not supposed to
laugh at any order, however extravagant
that may be sent them, but if one OF
Lynn's big shoe-dealers didn't indulge
in a real CHASTITY smile when he received
one order this fall it was because he had
not sufficient strength left. j. M. Far.
mum is colored preacher in Charlotte
N. c., and his fighting weight when
skirmishing with the legion of Satan is
4l0 pounds. He stands six feet ten
inches high without his boots, and, tax.
en- collectively, would be dangerous
man to fall under at skating link
Some time ago a Southern gentleman
met Mr. Farnum in the Soutl and the
latter ordered pair of shoes n lie fol
him at the North, for which this &c tie.
man took the measure. The order "
given to Lynn's leacing shoe manufact
urer, but it Was too much for him, and
a pair of shoes were made from 8
special last in Boston and sent the rever
end gentleman. The shoes are thirt, -fves
The length from heel to toe is just TWEEN
ty inches, and the width of the ball, in.
Guiding protuberancc that may be 8
corn and may be natural, is trifle ovel
seven and one half inches. Some ides
of the "tout-ensemble" may be gained
from the fact that pasteboard copy ol
the sole of one of the shoes which a re
porter carried in his overcoat pocket, ex
tended from the lowest depth of the
pocket to the arm-pits. This copy wal
taken from measurement Of the boot
less foot of the clergyman, and those who
know pronounce it correct.
From the forward end of the sole {
piece the size of dessert plate could b.
easily cut. The heel. if of the proper
material, would make decidedly gener
Gus far. jack, and the whole thing, in the
shape and size, gives one the irresistible
impression of a tennis racket, or al
elongated shirt front, without its sym
metrv. Boston Globe.
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
Recollections Of Reconstruction.

There were no cases sufficiently seri.
GUS to require the attention of a military
commission during reconstruction times
in Beaufort district. In fact, there was
no crime deserving the name. Negroes
would steal chickens. They had always
done that, and douot if many of them
realized that it was crime. They
locked upon a neighboring hen roost
much as the average schoolboy looks
upon neighboring orchard. They
believed there was nothing morally
wrong in helping themselves TO a neigh.
bor's chicken, provided the me- shbor hnd
plenty, and they merely took it ts eat.
Most OF them were ready to admit that
taking neighbor's chicken to sell was
stealing, and they would deny the mer.
cenary intention most violently. even
after admitting the taking" Their
ideas on morality in eeneral were verv
crooked, but they were the legitimate
fuits Of slavery. They might lie 10
avoid punishment and steal anything 10
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
What Became of the Mouse.

A lady in Coseytown discovered a
mouse in the family -four barrel. She
summoned her husband and told him ia
get gun and call the dog and station
himself near the scene of the onslaught
Getting up on high chair, she com.
menced punching the -four barrel with a
pole. The poor mouse soon made lis
appearance and started across the floor
the dog Immediately in pursuit. In the
excitement the man fred the gun, kill
ing the dog, and the lady tainted and
fell off the chair. The man, thinking
that she was dead and fearing arrest for
murder, cleared out, and has not been
heard of since. The mouse escaped.
Holidaysburg Penn Standard.
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
A Great Physician.

Old Doctor Pomp was called to attend
Anderson Buck, upon whom pneumonia
had spread its blightine hands. Old
Pomp, after looking at Anderson's
ongue, said:
"Got tongue like er steer
"Whut yer say? ?" asked Anderson's
wife.
Say his tongue looks sorter queer"
"Does yer think yer ken cure him
doctor?"
"Dat pens on how well he gifts erlong
chile. FL he gifts well, / thinks dat ken
cure him, but ef he dies, den thinks
dat he'll be outen my reach. We'se gol
ter wait 'velopments in er serious case
like dis heah one. Now, I'll leab yel
three doses o. medicine" beginning tc
wrap up white powders. "Dis is number
one, dis is number two, an Ills number
three. Gin him number three stist
We'se got ter work backwards in er case
like dis"
"Wall, sab"
as yer got it DOWN.?
"Yas, sah."
wall, now, doan yer make no mis-
take. III be rour' in de mawnin', an
see how he's gittin' erlong."
There were several women standin,
in the door-yard when the doctor called
next day, and the wsiling of grief, com
ing from with in the house, assured tn,
physician that the worst had come how
ever, he did not turn away, but entered
the house.
Doctor, he's dead ~ moaned the wo
man.
80 sees, madam. HAS yer got d.
papers whut wuz roun' dem powders p
"Yas, sab, heah da is" reaching VI
and taking them from the mantle-piece
"Lemme see 'em. Which one did We
gin fust ?"
"Dis one, thinks"
"Yas, an dat wuz number two. How
yer 'speck de po' man ter lib when ye
gin him de middle powder fust? Da
would break down de constertushun {
er elefin'. Heah yei's had dat pv' ma
strugglin' tween de third an fust pow
der. Doan see how he stood it SO Ions
Wall, kahn 'speck er doctor ter do nuth
in long el folks is SO keerless. Goo
day, madam. Ez yer's got SO muc
trouble on yer hans, won't speak
money matters dis mawnin'. Will b
roun' airter de funeral" Arkansa
Traveller.
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
The soprano Voice I'm pioiic.,.

Whatever foolish notions the novelists
may have instilled into our minds, wo-
man is not all emotion. The American
woman has her fair share of good sense
and administrative ability and there is
reason TO believe that might bring
into the region of governmental affairs
positive contributions of thrift. order,
integrity, and economy. Hers would be
a soprano voice in politics, the voice of
aspiration, the voice of inspiration. II
was no dreamer, no mere sentimentalist,
but the profoupdest poet of modern Eu-
rope, who gave us as the closing prophe-
cy of his Faust, "The woman-soul lead
eth us upward and on!' Judge Pitman,
Boston,
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
The Mind During Starvation.

The recent case of canibalism at sea
opens mp some curious question as to
the effects of fasting on the mortal ma.
ture of man. To the superficial observ.
er, death by starvation simply means a
wasting of the body, horrible agony
and increasing weakness, a lethargic
state of the brain, and a sleep from
which there is no awakening; but is
this all that it means? While this is 90
ing on l4 us consider whether or not
the intellectual faulty, and with II the
power ofdistinsuishing right from wrong
b not undergoing aprocss Of wasting
and death even before that of the ma.
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24

Chicago is the Place where the passen-
gers stop for dinner"
"Of course; that is what meant" ex-
planned the red haired man gently. Fact
Is" he went on with confidential frank
ness, "I've Travelled so much and been
in so many places in my lifetime that
dent purtend TO remember more'n a
quarter of 'em. What's the name of the
hotel III Chicago?"
There amt any" said the drummer,
gloomily.
Then he walked forward to the filter,
flled his mouth full of water, gai gled
his throat, whoosed the liquid on the
floor, and hung his leg over the corner
Of the box.
'Who is that evil-eyed, pink-haired
lumpy-legged, prairie-eared miciobe at
the other end of the carr" he asked OF
the conductor who was passing through
the train"
"Do you mean the gentleman looking
out ofthe Window
"Ya-as."
Hes fish merchant from st. Louis. "
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
How she Furnished Her Parlors.

Fair Customer-"Have you any pict-
ures for salc?"
Artist-"Severai, madam. All you see
on my studio walls arc as yet undisposed
ofn
swell, this one is about the right size.
How much is it?"
"You can have that for $780,"
Gracious! How awfully high. How
much is this?"
"Tbat is only $50"
Dead dear! ! can't afford such prices
Haven't you any for about S5?''
"Oh! no, ma lam.
"Too bad. You see we are furnishing
the drawing room now. We allowed
$3.50 for an easel with painting on it,
and got perfect love Of an easel for
$l45, and that leaves s. for the picture.
Phila. Call.
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
al without staininp their

eat, without staining their renu,...
yet q wapton or malicious liar aor sar
mcrcenary thief, were uuiversallva aug
pissed. Northern philanthropists .e
teachers never took time to studv sat
negro character. They brought ns
them what they considered a nom WI
morality, cold and rigid as cast r'i,ecs
Jacket, and insisted that the negro sha,,la ,Sl
put it on. Taking roasting ears ont y,
nsighbor's field, even to eat, acco,S;l
to the school marm, was stealins.
Christ and his disciples did the :, s., ys
thing and nobody complained. aWIas aWHds
does dem Yankees git dat ar ligiou sa. ~
how?" was a common and not ess;I'
answered question in the Freedms,l y
camp. The State Service.
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24

receive you. Not single cloud shall
pass over the horizon of mirth. All
enmities and bickenngs-vast chasms
of wrath and severance-sball be bridged
80 syour passage pleasant and
free TO our national hearth. Youth, man
hood and old age, all join in one great
chorus of love, till 1t fills the welkin and
threbs in merry ripples across the world;
for art rot thou the earthly herald OF
the heavenly song, "Glory TO God in the
highest, and on earth peace, goodwill
toward Ilen?"
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
No Wonder he Ran.

"You didn't get nothin' them" said a
tramp to comrade who returned in o
hurry from mission to house little
back from the road.
"Nothin'.'
mans at home, 'spose?"
"No; only womau.'
why didn't YOU take somethin' then?
Did she set the dog ON yer?"
'No, she didn't"
Pointed pistol at yer?"
'No, she threatened to throw a I.ail of
soap suds over me-"
what, soap and water? | don't won-
der you run from it," Boston Courier.
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
Acceptable Conditions.

"No, xir; ! gannod drust you for dot
bants."
"Why not, Mr.. Grindstein?'
because you never will bay me-"
81 know. but I've got a scheme by
which you can make some money"
"Vat :sh dot?"
"You know Goldsreckle. your rival
across the stieet?"
"Yes.'
swell, if tell him you trusted me Tor
pair Of pants. he'll trust me for coat
and vest Don't you seer A coat and
vest are worth i've times as much as a
pair Of pann You'll lose only fur
dolll1 whi}c he : loeine twenty dollar" !"
S6' CS ee6@e opsditions yon can have
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
A PARADOX.
HARRY n. eMfTu .

rccollect how grieved | was
when Cousin Amy married.
thought her very cruel because
For me she had not tarr ed.
She gave to my affection green
Encouragement In plenty,
For was under seventeen
And she was five-and-twenty.
Fair Amy is q widow now.
Her sorrow fast outgrowing;
'Tis very singular, ! vow,
The way the years are going.
With me at allegro rate;
With her graceful leute-
Now I'm nearing thirty-cight
And she ia slx-and-twenty:
l should be gratified to know
How others. like my cousin,
A twelvemonth older only grow,
One year in half u dozen.
Oh, Chronosl tell the secret me.
The power superhuman
That causes time with man to fee,
But bids II wait with woman.
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24
Pay 100 Cents ON the Dollar.

What started out to say, my boy,
was this. lfyou are in debt, carry your
self calmly as the great houses do. If
you owe a merchant $65, don't be in too
big hurry TO pay it, Just let him
sweat over it little while, until you see
how much he is going to pay on his own
debts. Then you can pro-rate with him.
But, on second thought, don't want
you to do that way. You want to re
form this great evil, do you not? Well,
the best way to bring about that reform
is to walk up and pay that S65 you owe,
Just the first minute you collar the mon
ey. Ifyou owe it to- a rascal, never mind
it is a just debt on your part, and don't
keep the conscience of the assignment"
operator. You pay 100 cents on the
dollar every time. Then by and by AS
you and your neighbors do this and
teach your children so to do, there will
arise a generation of men in America
who will pay 100 cents on the dollar and
Canada will becom bowling wilder
ness, unteHanted save bv the wild bear
and the wolf who will help the wilder
ness to howl.
Bank cashiers will sleep at home and
scon6dential clerks will spend their vaca.
tions in town. and a mans salary will
pay for everything he gets. But the only
way TO bring about this preparatory
millennium, my boy, is for you TO pay
that $65 when YOU owe it-every cent OF
IL No p,attar how much fha nfhev m N
owes nor how little he pays. You pay
your debts, my dear boy. and l will
know at least one man 10 whom ] wont
be afraid TO loan money without collat
eral security or gilt-edged paper. r. ]
The Osceola times., 1886-04-24

From official reports In Great Britain
It has been found that lunacy and sui.
eide among children under sixteen are
evils greatly on the increase, and Il d
thought that they ase tSacsablo TO hieh
pressure education.