davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23
A Bouncing Bride.

There was a wedding the other night
in cottage on Benton street. and about
ii o clock number of boys got togeth-
or to give the newly-married couple a
serenade. They had horns and tin pans
and various other musical instruments,
and had just tuned up when the groom
came to the door and said:
Boys, don't! This ere noise dis
turbs us.
a clod of earth hit him below the
belt, and he retired for few minutes.
When he rcappearcd he announccd:
Now, then. this ere has got to stop
or something will happen"
what will it be?" inquired voice
my wifc'll come out and bounce the
crowd.
He retired again as chunks of dirt
began to rattle around his ears. but in
n short time the door was thrown open
and the bride jumped out with club
in her hand. She was all business
from the start, and more than one scre-
nader got a sound whack before he dis
tanced her. In five minutes she had
scattered the crowd over ten acres, and
the husband stood in the door anaciap-
ped his hands and shouted:
go in, Mary! l knew you fellers
would hear something drop if you kept
on "-Detroit Free Press.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

An Arkansaw editor, who had just re-
turned from New York. thus spoke o.
his visit to the editorial rooms of a
great paper when went in nobody
seemed to care whether sat down or
not. waited and waited, expected
some fellow would say something about
taking a drink. but nobody said a word,
yet every one of them looked rs dry rs
a drouth. After awhile | hitched my
chair close up to bald-headed fellow
and said
'Recollect what the governor of
North Carolina said to the governor of
South Carolina, don't you?'
lie looked at me as though he
thought | was crazy and his eyes bulged
out so far that | could have knocked
them of with stick without touching
his head. Thinking that he must have
misund 'rsiood me, | again spoke of the
celebrated executive gentlemen. His
eyes stuck ont still farther Lets
90 down and take snort said /.
Great Caesar. how he did swell up. !
thought that he would explode. He
turned around. called niger and
said: Show this man down. Most
unsociable man | ever saw. went out
and went around to the editorial rooms
of Harper'S Magazine, but none of the
fellows would drink with me. 1t was
the first time | had ever known the
two governors TO fail. "-ArkanSao0
VrnVeIer
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23
Hoped it was Permanent.

II am struck dumb at your conductr'
exclaimed Mrs. Dempsey as her hus-
band tottered into the house at a. m.
the other night after playing a tattoo
with the latchkey all over the door
"W-well, my dear" was the cheer
full response, I'm sure l h-hope it's a
permanent strike. "-Burlington Free
Press.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

is that If any man or woman afflicted
with disease or arrangement Of the liver.
resulting IN poisonous accommodations IN
tie blood. fulous affections. sic ,-head
acl e. and diseases of the Kidneys. lung, or
heart. These troubles eau be cured only
10y going To the priH a. cause. and putting
the liver in a healthy condition. To ac-
comrlsh this result speedily and effect
ually nothing has proved us so effica-
cious a. Or. Pierce'S Golden Medical
Discovery" which has never failed 10 30
the worl. claimed for IT, AMI never will.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

What can b. more disagreeable. more
disgusting than to sit in room with a
person who is troubled with catarrh, and
has 20 keep coughing and clearing his or
her throat of the mucus which drops into
it. Such persons are 90 be pitiel II they
uY 20 cure themselves and fail. But il
they get DR.. Sage's Catarrh Remedy there
mood LIE 20 f4ilnre
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23
I'm .ortsnt

When you visit or leave New York City,
save baggage, expressage and s. carriage
hire, and stop at the GRAND UNION HOTEL,
opposite Grand Central Depot
Gl5 rooms, fitted up at the cost OF one
million dollars, 81 and upwards per day.
European plan. Elevator Restaurant
supplied with the best. Horse cars, stages
and elevated railroad to all depots Fam
HES can live better for less money at tho
Grand Union Hotel than at any other
frst-class hotel in the city
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23
IN THE COUNTRY ALL SUMMER.

The man who takes his family into the
country for the summer should remember
that he will save his children a gread deal
OF pain and himself "a large amount OF
money in doctors bills, If he is thoughtful
enough 20 carry supply Of PERRY DAVIS
PAIN KILLER. The medicine is standard
specific for all cases Of cramps, collie
cholera morbus, diarrhna or dysentery
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23
a MO,T LiDEKAL orFrK,

THE NoLTMc BELT Co, Marshall, Mich,
offer to send their Celebrated VoLTArc BELTS
and Electric appliances on thirty days
trial to any man afflicted with Nervous
Debility, Loss Of Vitality, Manhood &c.
Illustrated pamphlet il. Sealed earelope with
full particulars, mailed free. Write them
al once.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

4 study Of GO Italian thunderstorms has
shown SIEnor Ferria that every thunder
storm j. behind a depre, sion of barometer
and hygrometer, and before one of the
thermometer.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

A thief sentenced i'm an English court
the other day To five years penal servitudc
asked the judge to lend him shilling, and
said he would toss him whether the sen
tence should be 10 years or nothing.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

Since the Springfield, Mass. public lib
rary became free the number of books
taken out has been multiplied by three.
although the yearly charge was previous
ly only :
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

Ladies, be your own drcssmakers.
HanoVer's Merchant Tailor System OF
DressmaltinS by the square is the only
work that can he used successfully with
out teacher. 1t consists OF squares
curvature, book and rs diagrams iustructs
how TO draft, cut, drape and finish ladies',
mems and childrcn's garments. Price S..
Address with stamp,
NINE. LOCKWOOD az Co,
Room - Nee Ban Building,
Chica0o m
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

If sick headache is misery. what are Car
ter's Little Liver Pills If they will positive
cure it, People who have used them speal;
frankly of their worth They are small
and easy 10 take
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

= Rupture radically cured. also pile
tumors and fistulp. Pamphlet of partic-
ularS 10 cents in stamps. Worlds Dlspens
AIRY Medical Association, Buffalo, y. y.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

ANY lady sending - cents for Illustrated Gaia.
lOgue OF Briggs Transfer Patterns and mentioning
this paper will receive tree n valuable work on EN-
broidery. O.. l.. Fox, ~ Woodward Ave. Detroit
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

Piso's Remedy for Catarrh is agreeable
20 use. II is not n lianih or snur. soc
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

They are over 30 criminals in Jail in the
various parts Of the state of North Caro-.
lima under sentence of death. over half
of them are likely TO be hanged ere the
year ends
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

Two members Of parliament have lately
fallen heirs TO t2,0OD apiece. beqpeathed TO
them 10y n lady with whom neither had an
acquaintance. and who did not even state
the grounds OF hor appreciation
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

Dear reader send 90 g. J.. Fox. Detroit. fo~ IA sam
pie uf Briggs liansf,r Patterns. You VIII 10; 20.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23
Asal Cas-: 0. ?, s2rlng.

1t is not others peoples poultry that
needs attention. il is YOURS.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

Smallpox was first described a. ID. 9CC
by khazes. an Arabian physician.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

Holiness a. well a. pardon. is 70 be had
from the blood Of the cross.-B rr,lgf.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

THE habt oi running over boots or shoes correct
ed with Lyon Patent Heel S,incucrs
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

Vermont has ten living eX-governors, of
whom four are each over ~ Nears old.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

Brgss Transfer Patterns The uniyer al fayorlte
NrrNousu"~s and Dysr.psia cured
BY CAErLHs LITTLE NERVE PITS. Iwcu, y-nve
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

As a hair dressing, Halls Hair Remover
has no equal. Ask your druggist for il.
Tho only warranted cure for chills and
fever is Aver Ague Cure.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

Cures piles or hemcrrhoids, itching. protruding,
remedy In each package. Sure cure, j0c. Druggists
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23
..ROUGHON ITCH
"ROUGHON PILESr

Rough on Itch cures skin humOrs, eruptions
ring worm, letter. salt rhcum. frosted feet chill
blains itch, ivy poison. BARRIERS itch. zoe. jars
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

Rough on Rats clears out Rat.. Mice. 5c.
Rough on Corn,' hard or soft corn-, bunons. lie
Rough on Touthacho.' instant relief. ljc.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23
Cutthig ca and cave i.

Briggs Transfer Patterns a.e used by all ladies'
Send for clrcuIar. q. J.. EoN, nelrnt.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23
DIR. JOHN BULBS
Smiths I oliG Syrup
FOR The Cure CS
FEVER and ACUE
Or CKIlLS and FEVER,

The proprietor Of this celebrated cdicine
Justly claims for it superiority over all rem
edies ever offered to the public FIR the SAFE,
CERTAIN, SPEEDY and PERMANENT cure
ofAgue and Fever, or Chillsan Fever ,wheth.
er Of short or long standing. He refers TO tho
entire Western and Southern country TO bear
him testimony to the truth Of the assertion
that in no case whatever will fail to cure il
the directionsares strictly followed and carried
out. In great many cases single dose has
been sufficient for cure. AID whole families
have been cured by single bottle, with per-
feet restoration Of the genera health. tits,
however, prudent, and in ev rycase more GER
tain to cure, fits use is continued in smaller
doses for week or two after the disease has
been checked, more especially in difficult and
long-standing cases. Usually this medicine
will not require any aid to keep the bowels in
good order. Should the patient. however, re-
quire cathartio medicine. after having taken
three or four doses of the Tonic, a single dose
of KENTS VEGETABLE FAMILY PILLS
will be sufficient. Use no other.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

NcasiN Women with Pale
i4.-.. L-...-L 4 l--L-L- ILL.... Ill
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

All ladies use BriQg, Trans: Ger Patterns sen
Tor circular. O. !. toA. Detroit.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-07-23

y convict who had his hand crushed in
a shoemaking machine has heen awarded
5000 damages 10y the Brooklyn supreme
his labor
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1886-09-04
FREEDOM

We have had the warmest weather
known in these parts in the past week,
but our farmers say just the thing for
corn. The large fields of this grain,
promise an abundant harvest, if the
hail does not strike US.
We learn that our friend J. NJ. Mich
OILS, of Greenwood, is still quite sick,
and that his wife and near neighbOrs
are worn out watching with him nights
We would suggest that those friends
of his that were wont to visit him so
much when in health, and especially
about dinner time, would remember
that their assistance is much needed
now, and by helping to bear the burden
they might receive the commentator ,
sin as much as you have done it unto
Inc least Of these, you have done it I'M
to me-"
Death has visited the home of our
friend, Mr.. W E. Goddard and called
away their baby. The lovely blossom
faded at the early opening, and has
gone to bloom IN the fair Eden above,
They have the sympathies of a large
community of friends in this their great
beTeaYe menC.
Mr.. McCagley and Mr.. Morgan ca n
had a cow killed by lightning on the
9Th of this month.
Land is getting to be in demand in
our township and some farms are
changing hands. OBSERVER.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1886-09-04
For Congressman 9th District,
HON. E. j. TURNER.
70 oUR PATRONs.

AS an inducement TOR subscribers to
pay up old scores and renew their sub
scription for another year, we have
made such arrangements with the
I.eavenworth Times, that enables us to
oHer that leading paper with the HER
AID for only $3.50 for both. The
Times needs no introduction at our
hands as it is essentially the state paper,
being a fearless, OutspOken, independ-
ent Republican journal. It believes in
the enforcement of al laws and that
the statutes should rule instead Of pol
icy. During the present campaign it
will be more than interesting, as both
sides Of all questions win be presented
3n its columns, and while not endorsing
anything outside Of the straight Repub-
lican ticket, believe that all are entitled
TO a hearing.
This offer is for limited time and If
you want to take advantage Of a good
offer do so at once. This offer is fol-
all our subscribers. Those already
in advance on their subscription to the
HERALD, will be credited q year for
both papers on receipt of S1.5O. Let
every subscriber avail himself of this
opportunity.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1886-09-04


Linn, August 3I.-There is great ex-
element throughout this part of Wash
ingtOn county in consequence of the
discovery OF what Is supposed to be
family of wild human beings. Nester-
day evening, while two young men
from this place were walking through
the woods about ten miles west of here
and a mile and a half south of the
camp meeting ground on Parsons creek
they heard q strange noise in dense
thicket near by, and starred to InVesti-
gate. They had gone but a short dis
lance when they come IN sight of what
appeared to be four hum an beings.
Two were grown, one appare ntly four
teen years Of age and child of two or
three years. All were in nude state.
They were all dark skinned and the
upper part of their bodies was covered
with what looked like coarse black hair
as soon as they saw the young men
they ran down the creek. The men
followed and were gaining on them
when they dropped the child, which
Mr.. WalkOUgh caught. Having lost
sight of the older ones, they carried the
child up to the camp ground where it
was taken charge of by Rev. POurlett g,
of this place, and brought to Linn
| where it can be found by any one wish
] ing to see 1t. As soon as q party could
| be organized they started to search for
those who had escaped having first sent
word to sheriff Scott of this county,
/ who came Immediately to the scene,
and is now searching the woods with q
/ large party. DR.. FarrOW and Charley
/ Becker, OF Linn, have gone out, and
/ when they return if there is anything of
/ interest L Wall write you full particulars.
w, H WHIMPLE.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1886-09-04
1T MUST BE MET

To come down to the cUld, practical
facts. this liquor question IS upon the
country, ana must be met. There is no
lodging or evading it. There is but
one party that can meet it openly and
sQuarelY, and thatis the Oze that for thir-
" years mas met every public question in
such a way Ii is hardly necessary to
say that it is the Republican party. 1t
is now more than two hundred and fifty
years since Calico asserted that ''the
world moves" The Republican party
accepted that belief at its birth, and 1t
has been one of its cardinal principles.
The Democratic party never believed
it ana its policy has been shaped ac-
cOrdingly when the Democratic party
does advance, it lOOses its hold, as it
were and moves in the track that the
Republican party made in passing the
muddy water on the highway after a
/ shower, will creep sluggishly along
until it finds an old wagon track to flow
along in. The old Wing party was a
good old party. Had it boldly met the
slavery question at the critical period,
il would have become what the Repub-
lican party has since been. But it tenn
pOrizei, and compromised and eVaded
until it was utterly overwhelmed, and
the Republican party arose upon its
ruins, to carry out the work that it shirk-
Gu j ne lem tLL4G party was dLl ca
on the other side-as it Is invariably ar
rayed on the wrong side-and the Wing
party failing 10 champion the right, the
cOuntrydemanded a party that would do
so, and the Republican party sprang into
existance. The old Abolition party, and
even the Free Soil party, never accom-
plished anything in fighting slavery; but
they always did draw strength from the
Wing party give success to the party
that upheld slayery-just as the st. John
prohibition party is doing to-day in the
cause of temperance. If the Republi-
can party does not wish to meet the fate
OF the old Wing party it must avoid its
mistakes. 1t embraces all the best
principles of the Wing party, and has
the courage which that party lacked
However we have confidence that
whatever the Republican party does on
this question will be for the best. 1t
is competent to meet the issue, and
it will triumph, leaving the Democratic
party as has been its wont, to cling
and hug the corpse OF dead barbar-
/ isms. Sol. Miller.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1886-09-04
CRYSTAL

Farmers are now cutting and putting
up their hay The most OF them have
their threshing done Wheat, oats and
rvs are turning out fair crops. Corn
bids fair TO be very good crop, better
than the average for some years past.
Mr.. O.. W. Chapman has built him
very good and comfortable frame house
a story and half 1924 feet with an
addition lZx2S.
j . E. Griffin has built a nice house
16x2G with an addition 12xl8 and has
1t painted. He is also going to build
granary.
MIR. G. D. Roberts is building a
house 24x24 on the school section 16,
that he purchased of j NJ. Clugh, who
is now in Cheyenne county, Kansas.
c. j. Puffer has treated his frame
house to two coats of paint; L. n Ford
is building an addition to his house:
j. A. Harrison is building q residence
and ID. Marshall has built him a stone
house 1SX2O and has also enlarged his
old dwelling besides putting up an ice
house and other improvements.
A Mr.. Homer, of Iowa has purchas-
ed a half section of land, and viii move
here some time this fall or winter.
There has been two very nice and
substantial frame school houses built in
l-4-1 Vicinity L-44S HAL--L-UA O46 II us
trict SO and one in district 81.
Mr.. l.. w, Monk is going TO build a
frame house this fail. He is now draw
ing the lumber for it. Good frame
buildings are now taking the place Of
dug-Oubs and sod houses
The political pot is just beginning to
simmer around the edges. One of our
candidates has paid rs a visit looking
after the fences. We expect other can
didates viii pay US a visit soon.
What is the reason the HERALD don't
make its weekly visits here. We have
had just three numbers Of the HERALD
since July 1st. We think it is owing to
the discOntinuance of our Phillipsburg
mail route. 1t works a serious incOn-
Venienee to US in this vicinity.
Two Of our young men have taken
unto themselves wives quite lately. Mr..
l.. n. Ford has married Miss +. NJ.
Snow, of Crystal township, and Mr.. w.
+. Marshall has married Miss j. e.
Brown, of Alma, Nebraska.
Aug, %. ICHABOD.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1886-09-04

The FL Dorado Republican calls for a
ssshow down" in the following article,
in which, in response to an uncircum-
stanlial lie. it presents cold circum-
tial facts:
''AIany representative Republicans
throughout the State are openly declar-
ing for Col. Tom Moonlight. Kansas
Democrat.
In proof of your statement suppose
you give US The names of a few, not
necessarily for publication, but as guar
antee OF good faith, and in the mean
time we viii give you the names of rep
resentitive Democrats who viii not vote
for Moonlight. Let's get down to bus
mess, and as a starter we will mention
Dr. W. Z. Kuhn, Elliot X. Robinson
and John IL. Belts, three influential
Democrats who will not vote Tor Moon
light. Come on with your names.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1886-09-04

Some time age S. n. Wood a noted
politician of Stevens county was arrest
ed for criminal libel and upon being re-
leased on bail Wood and Price, his
partner, were taken in hand by body
of men and run into ''no mans land"
and have not since been heard from.
Governor Martin telegraphed to the
Sheriff Of Stevens county to do what he
could in the matter, but received reply
that he was powerless to act. The
Governor then sent a dispatch to Tim
McCarty of the Kansas National Guards
to proceed to Stevens county and search
for the missing men. The Garden City
Sentinel gives this version Of the
trouble.
Mr., Taylor, of Nc PhersOn county
came up from HugOtOn yesterday, and
reported here that Sam Wood and his
partner Price had been released on bail.
They were charged with circulating a
criminal libel, and were arrested on q
warrant sworn out in due form, which
was served by a regular officer. They
were not kidnapped, this story being
started by Col. Wood and his friends
for effect. The trouble down there ap-
pears to be that Wood has started a
town some four or five miles northeast
of HugOton, for the purpose Of making
it the county seat Of Stevens county.
He has two shanties in his town, but
expects to be able to build quite large
place in time: HugOtOn is a town Of
some One-hundred and twenty-five
houses and a considerable population
and the people there would not have
paid any attention to Col. sam Wood
had it not leaked out that It was his in
tentiOn to throw obstacles in the way TO
the election and complete organization
of the county The election is to take
place in about two weeks, and it came
to the ears of the HugOtOn people that
| Col. Sam Wood was publishing over the
county statements highly detrimental TO
| HugOtOn and to the manner in which
/ the election would be conducted, and it
! also leaked out that he was laying plans
/ TO serve the county commissioners with
an Injunction to prevent the canYassing
/ of the vote. He hoped to get the matter
| in the courts and thus oligLG the pro-
! spects of HugOtOn and have an OppOr-
/ tunlty to build up his own town to be a
/ formidable rival Of that town
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1886-09-04
oampaIsn Appolntments.

The Republican Congressional Committee met
at Beloit last week and arranged for the following
appointments:
Lenora-Oct. s. go p. m. Hons. E. J. Turner
Webb McNan and Frank j. Kelley.
Logan-Oct. 9, 80 p. m Same as above.
Long lsland-Sept- 23 $50 p. IN. Hons E. j.
Turner r. II. Picker, W H. Barnes and c. Ii.
Hawkins.
Phinipsburg-Oc II, / 80 p. N. Hons. E. j.
Turner, S. u. Bradford and Webb McNall.
KirWin-Oct H. go p. III. Same as above an q
Hon. A. ID. Ellis.
Cedarvile-Oct. 13, ! 80 p. m. Hons. E. J. Tur-
uer. s. b. Bradford and Thee Braeken.
Gaylord-Oct. Is, p m. Same as above.
smith .CeuIer-Oct. a. 1850 p. Same as