Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-10-06
BRIGHT BITS.

TOURIST without money ia a tramp. A
tramp who has money Is a tourist.-Te1dS
SJtihgs.
THERE Is one thing Geronimo did not do.
He Geronimande -eu no Congressional dis
trlct.-S"i Francisco Aht.
ADA REHAN, the actress, brought bull
dog, named MeDhisto. from England. When
the brute grabs an obj ctionahle admirer ny
the reg the latter will know how the bite Of
Mephlsto-pheles -yor' ist arR he AID.
AJuBrLEB.-Judge-Ar you aware Of any
mltigating circum stances in your case.
Crlmlnsl-1es, your Honor, this is the If
tleth time have been arres ed for vagrancy
AMI thought that perh pS we might get up a
little jubilee TGIS S,ftin9s.
LITERARY MAN naughingJ-Yes, took to
literature naturally. | was vaccinated from
quill, you know.
Friend (grimly)-Va! The world would have
been the gamer if yon had been vaccinated
from IA PICK or shovel.-Erch1n9e.
A TRAIN was della cd for an hour in Troy,
n. y, recently, and drummer remarked 10
the conductor: "rhis is orr oftwelye ounces
to the pound affair. ain'tIt?'
"HOw's thar"
Troy wait, you know" -Pitts5uro CAroni-
| Gle.
| CLERK (writing)-And what is your name,
sirY
Exile from Erin-Me name, is it sorP
Clerk-1es, L wish to know your name.
| What is il?
Exile from Ern-Sure, an can't We find
/ 1t In the directory?
| THE lum ii tum visiting card of members of
| the Chinese Legation in this city is about the
size OF Western Union telegraph blank, and
| has the same yello W ish tint. Yellow to Chi
naman Is lise green to Erins sons The name
OF the Chinese swell on the card looks as ii a
! spider had rested confidlngly on it only to be
| hit by brick.-EechdH0e.
MRS. REVERE, New York widow, whose
husband lies buried in Woodiawn Cemetery,
| found on visiting that spot lately that another
woman had planted some shrubs there. and
! promptly pulled them up bv the roots. She
subsequently published notice ia a morning
| paper threatening prosecution if the odense
"as ever repe ated. The grave has no shrubs
| growing on 1t noW.-NelO YorE Paper.
THE first three or four Ind IN husbands who
| shot their wives by mistake for burglars re-
| ceiyed the sympathies of the community and
| were promptly acquitted of all blame by the
| Coroner, but the game has been played to
sur h an extent that the law has become sus-
plcious. The shooter is asked q great many
leading questions, and if he can't answer in a
sat stXcuOry manner is sent to Jail and put Oh
trial for murder.-Detroit Free Press.
BAGLEY-Ah. De Baggs! where art thou
| going with the hobby horse?
De Baggs-'Tis for little Jimmy, my young
est sprout.
Bagley tsagely)-It's a costly business tc
| have children.
Dc Rags gloomlyl-I should say 80. Every
time start out to buy n ten cent tov / meel
| somebody know, and then away goes a dol.
lar or two for cigars and PAi6ldelphtC
| Call
CHARLOTTE THOMPSON was recently play,
ing Jane Eyre" to very sender houses il
Buffalo. and could not understand the reason
unit! told that the people OF that city were 81
| jealous OF the city of Rochester that they
could not stand the fact that the prime pa
male character was called Lord Rochester
placard was immediately prepared an
nOuncing that the character would be named
Lord Buffalo. The story goes that there wa
standing room only at the next performance
! -ErcbdHge.
MANAGER-YOu have not got a proper ap-
probation OF art. and cannot give you NOR,
than $2J week.
Pretty actress-But l was getting $500 jus
after | was divorced, you must remember.
Managerial, you are the actress who wa
divorced?
Actress-1es.
Manager-And eoped with the Frencl
Count?
Actress-Ges.
Manager-Three hundred dollars week.
NetO York Graphic.