Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1886-07-24
But He Nearly Drove to Crime or In.
sanity Five Men who We're.

| shade to q little above temperate. As the bar
| Der cauterized a cash in the incumbent apC
| recumbent victims cheek, the fat gentleman
! who seemed to labor under the impression
| that he was "next," pulled off his coat and re
! moved his No. 10 collar. His habitual smile
! dissipated while waiting his turn, began 4
| steal back over his dorid countenance and tn,
scowl on his heavy brow slowly retreated up
ward and took refuge under cover of his hair
| All signs of his jmpatience vanished as thu
! barber yanked the cloth from the man in the
| chair and as he stretched himself out the fa,
| man felt SO good-natured that he cracked 6
| favOrite chestnut OF the crop OF so at the bar
ber's expense. Just then an individual with
in remote corner of the room, wob
b bIed over, broke through the hollow square
ana an, Inquired ,drn II ne wasn't "nexts. The
dream of heavenly delight and cast ar
evil eye on the man OF cold abstraction
the newcomer stood his ground and wrune
from the dazed barber ON unwilling confession
that that the gentleman Of abnormal avoirdupo,s
| and q grunt, the scowl came forth from lis re-
treat tire, in his hair and resumed dominion over
| the chair, into which the frigid Individual
climbed with arctic placidity and settled down
with a dull hud. There was n terrible space OF
intense silence among the men who formed the
hollow square as their baff1ed companion again
dropped down among them, and for moment
| after. Then real nice young man, whose turn
was three away, arose in a state Of nervous i'm
patience, grabbed q brush from the mirror
stand, hurriedly arranged his hair and told the
| barber he guessed he would
WAIT UNTIL NEXT DAY
for shave. This nearly wrecked the solemnity
of his companions, for the young man might
have waited years without running any risk OF
indictment for cheating the barber The four
who were left exhausted their available stock
mans expense, and then reiapsed into gium
expectancy. Then natty, athletic look ne,
gentleman who afterwards proved to be second
next got up and slowly circumnavigated the
BARRIERS chair, looking hard all the while at the
seli-cOntained individual who seemed brooding
complacently over the misery he was OCCASION
Ing his four fellow mortals. The frosty indi-
Vldual In the chair took no notice of this silent
guying. The only perceptible effect it had on
MN MN was 10 increase the blinking OF his eyes
from their normal rate OF twenty-three a min
ute to about one second. When the athletic
gentleman returned to his seat the man in the
CHAIR resumed his grave contemplation OF the
decorative designs on the ceiling, and his eye
iashes met and parted at their former coniorta-
BILE rate.
This scene seemed greatly to tickle the ner.
Vous.iook1ng little gentleman with feeble side
whiskers, who had just finished reading for the
fourth time the Business Chances advertise.
ments in The STAR. He smiled very know.
lnxiy and apprOvIngly at
THE DARING C1RCUMNAv1eAToR
Of the BARRIERS chair, and he looked Quizzically
at the stolid form stretched out In it, Then a
brilliant thought seemed to strike him and
lFTauldteQ his emac1atcu cOuntenaDCe until his
whiskers took on a deeper shade OF straw. He
got up with ii weak pretense at mischievous de-
termination, evidently thinking that lie would
repeat the experiment OF walking around the
BARRIERS chair and staring hard at its phlegma-
tic occupant, but he didn't. He took "a lev
steps forward, and had just summoned up
enough courage to glance furtively Down at the
iron-gray Whiskers OF the man under the bar.
bers hands, when the latter slightly turned his
head and transhxed the nervous man with a
stare tnat Il GOrgon might be proud Of The
nervous man staggered from the shock and
then smiled ALPHABETICALLY, and tried to pretend
he had merely got up to go over and exchange
q Jew words with the cashier.
a few uneventful moments followed. Signs
began TO accumulate that the barber was rap
idly getting throug b with the job in hand. The
four expectants awoke from their lethargy and
seemed once more to take an in terest in earthly
affairs. The fat man, who had been bending
forward with his iOre-arms resting on the arms
OF his chair AMI the tips of the fingers of his
right hand 6raced agains: the tips OF the fingers
yawned. His good-nature had conquered his
recent bitter disappointment and he glanced
with amused expectancy at the occupant OF
shot into a Sitting position 10y the barber. The
barber's fingers had cleft his hair. aud the bar
ber's right hand held poised above his head a
water bottle, preparatory TO the closing tonso-
rial rite. when the phlegmatic individual re-
marked in a voice of madding caimness that
GUESSED HE'D HAVE SHAMPOO
The BARRIERS right hand fell as ii paralyzed,
and the fat man, who had half risen, dropped
back into his chair SO mad that his emotional
powers gave out. The sh.rp-eyed man, who
was tiir4 next, and who looked like an agita-
tor, crossed his legs very snappiShly a Sign of
his lnputience. Then he turned to a little table
at his elbow and began TO make a rough draft
OF bill forbidding, severe penalties any per-
son having his head snampooed in public bar
Der shop during business hours and while there
were two or more men waiting their turns to he
shaved. The nervous man yraSped his weak
side whiskers, and would have twisted them out
by the roots II his chagrin had not found a less
painful but more satisfactory vent in flight.
Thus the waiting shavers were reduced to three
ali Oh whom joined heartily III the wish that the
barber would ho,d the imperturbabe individ.
uaFs head under the spigot until he was
drowned When he Went to wash the shampooing
mixture out. But the unhappy and now ner.
vous barber did nothing more serious than to
nearly put his customers eyes out with a jet OF
not water, Wiefeat the waiting three greatly re-
joiced, and were in some degree moiiiiied.
The atmosphere began 10 clear again as the
barrier took his brush and comb and went to
work On the cold mans scanty hair The fat
man began to feel that at las. he would get the
shave Tor which lie haa waited long. He
felt confident the old wretch in the chair
wouldn't haye his hair cut, aud there was
nothing else he could have done to himself
relaxed the hard muscles Of his jaws and once
more looked cheerful. The barber brushed the
lrisid individuals hair so as best To conceal
the scantiness OF its growth. The f. j. bent for
ward as If about TO rise, and the tat man,
with u sigh OF deep-sealed relief, did likewise
But the former only looked at himself in the
short mutton chop whiskers and sal, he
thought they
NEEDED A LITTLE TRIMMING.
The latter tell back in mute despair into
his seat. The athletic looking man, who
had thus far waited like born on.-distance
| waiter, got up and asked with biting irony II
| the shop would be open on Christmas. The
barber answered that it would, until noon.
Then the athletic looking man said he would
try TO get around and left. When the barber
had trimmed the distracted man s Whiskers to
their owners entire satisfaction, the latter
again sat up in the Chair, carefully inspected
his face and head in the glass, and then handed
tue barber bill to take his pay out OF. He
remained placidiy seated in the chair, unmind.
ful OF the hydrophObic glare in the axitator's
eyes, until his change was handed him. Then
he slowly, and with an air OF the most profound
unconcern, climbed down and went his way
bearing with him the direst anathemas of the
two men who were LETT out of the five who
entered the waiting contest against time
When the imperturbable individual had got
out and had disappeared around the corner
then, and not till then, did the fat man. now
reduced 20 u state OF nervous prostratiOn by
the conflicting emotions of the last hour yeu-
ture to get into the chair, and at last settle
down to get the shave which had cost him SO
dearly In time aud in nervous tissue
---<O~-
THE SAFETY ROD,
The Device i'm Postal Cars for SAVING
the Limbs and Lives Of Clerks.
/ ~A,I