Western cyclone. [volume] (Nicodemus, Kan.) 1886-1887, 1886-08-26
THE TELEPHONE INSPECTION.
A Tennessee Judge Who Wished to be
Accommodating

Accommodating.
Judge F-is a very quiet, easy
going man when everything runs
smoothly, but let him once get ratified
aad the neighborhood cannot pacify him.
He will snarl at his best friend when
annoyed, and the man who plays prac-
teal joke on him had better emigrate.
Yesterday, as the clock struck l, he was
seated IN his Office very much worried
over chancery case in which he is coun-
sci, and his desk was fairly Uttered with
papers, while he was hurrying through
with certain part of his work before
dinner hour. Suddenly the telephone
bell rang a gentle summons, just as
though the girl in the central Office
knew the judge was busy and hated to
disturb him, but was, nevertheless, COM
PEELED to, in order to satisfy the individ-
ual at the other end of the line. The Judge
rose hurriedly, jerked the receiver from
the hook and yelled Hello"
A silvery voice-a girlish won't-y you
oblige me accent-betrayed that one of
the fair sex was the caller. The Judge
toned down and inquired, ''Well?"
us that Judge F." inquired the
sweet-toned voice.
YES" was waited back.
"Oh! 1 am so glad. This is Miss n.
and have been given charge of all COM
plants Cd the line. Before making out
our new list / wish to learn how your
instrument works.
C"Just like a'charm, replied the gallant
judge. II have no fault to find either
with the instrument for service"
"Thank you," was the sweet rejoinder,
"but you know how the managers would
appreciate few words of commentator
from you, so if you are not too busy,
would it be asking too much if you would
devote fifteen minutes towards thor
ough test of your Instrument"
When there is lady in the case the
judge is never in hurry and in his
blandest tones he announced himself at
the young lady's bidding.
| Another vote of thanks come over the
wire and the soft voice inquired if he
could place his ear about ten inches
higher than the transmitter in order to
test the power of hearing distinctly.
Unfortunately, the Judge is large in
circumference, but not far from the
ground, and he could not reach his arm
higher than his ear-trumpet rack, much
less his head up there.
He was man, however, who was not
to be overcome by trihes, and an idea
struck him. He determined to oblige the
telephone girl, and he proceeded to in
form her to hold the telephone just
minute and he would be ready.
Again the bewitching voice uttered
thanks, and the judge put his plans into
operation. The telephone was alongside
the Office window: about halfway up the
casing was a stout nail; revolving book
case stood on the floor. 1t was quickly
rolled over towards the window; the
judge mounted it grasped the nail on
the window casing with one hand, the
ear-trumpet on the other and sang out,
"All ready"
There was no response and the Judge
nearly twisted his neck out of joint as
he leaned down and repeated the words
through the transmitter.
The sweet voice answered in a low
tone, and the Judge strained his ears in
listening. "Now, Judge" came the
message, "listen attentively and repeat
the following words back to me, SO that
may know that you heard them dis
tinctly: What part of speech is the
word Observation-Disclosures"
1t was too much even for the Judge.
on the tenth syllable he squirmed, the
nail broke; he made grab for the tele-
phone box: the bookcase revolved, and
the renters in the story below thought
the roof had fallen in When several of
them came running into the room the
Judge was lying on the floor, the law
book from the case between his knees,
while in his hand he Rugged the fatal
ear trumpet which he had chung to in
the fall, and the cord which had been
snapped in twain.
The matter was given into the hands
of detective, who last night reported to
the judge that the telephone company
employed no inspectors or testers of in
struments, and further that the call came
from a private residence where the
judges wife was spendinf the day. An
air of unusual GOODNESS permeates the
judges home now. and the telephone
company has lost a subscriber.