The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1886-07-08
PRIVATE DAIzEIL's sopRIQUET
And the Fun He has with TIA Name With.
put u scandal.
CoTr,Sn0hdetae 0fihs h,tsliioetns,

peFiences 90 q lecturer, He Gays the men
bers OF the Grand Army Of the RepnblI
have always treated him with great II
speCt and unaffected familiarity, but ths
the higher officers Of the army and th
ladies' gave him the cold shoulder gen
orally, His name sounds gross and com
mon 10 them and they seldom speak Q
they pass by, They usually like a bit Q
gold lace, shoulder stripe and a resouud
ing title, but for I-sobrlquet OF the Phi
vate they do not even try 70 conceal thei
"Why, sir" exclaimed the Private, ri
more than twenty years Of almost cor
slant travel, and at over q thousand laIg
gatherings that ! have addressed, hsV
not been formally introduced to a dozel
ladies or officers, though must have me
Q million Of them They hurry ava
from meetings and do not care to be In
troduCed in any formal fashion, for, yoI
know, the conventional introduction
stands for mutual confession or concsa
sion, at the least Of the equal standing o
the parties. Nobody insists to be intro
dueed to only private, while all the boy
who even priyates, rush In and Introduce
themselves with o familiar slap on tn,
shoulder, a hearty grasp OF the hand, anC
a "Hello, old fell, how are you any way 2
II Is amuelng to hear the Private tall
about 1t. He says he Ia not hurt at all By
this, rather enjoys 1t, and, likes 1t all tht
more because 1t 10 just the way II was In
the army, nobody noticed you or spoke
70 you but the men Of your own rank
The little Private Is ignoble, debasing, SC
at least the good ladies and officers regard
II, and 1t cannot be helped.
General Sherman once advised him Il
dropit,
agreed quickly responded the Pri
vate, with his characteristic sarcasm, "
will II you drop yours. II isabout all you
and / have" Old Tecumseh smiled grim,
y and dropped 1.-THE subieCt-not the
II have had the same experience my.
sell, " one day said Fred Douglass, as the
Private reports 1t. "Charles Sumner, Mr.,
Giddings, Mr.. Phillips, Mr.. Garrison, Mr.,
Higginson and myself have often spoken
from the same platform. They had to be
approached with great ceremony after the
meeting and 1t was hardly more difficult
to get an Introduction at the White House
than to them. But as for me, we'll but
few, and they old maids or old cranks,
cared to be presented, and the rest passed
along in sllenCe-I mean OF the leading
people. But as for the under sort Of COM
mon fellows, they would come up with
boorlsh familiarity and introduce them
selves with an offensive air which plainly
showed that they considered 1t quite a
condd9Cension TO speak to niger at all. p
And soft is precisely with the Private,
as he is free to confess himself II have
laughed over II thousand tlmes," said
he, though 1t cost mo seat in Congress
and the Governorship Of Ohio, ten years
and more ago. My sobrlquet Is vulgar, the
last thing in the world / should have
adopted. Preachers, popular lecturers
and show people come along and by their
eloquence or good looks land have both,) J
attract the ladies and arlstocrata whom /
uniformly repel by my plebalan pseudon-
yam and selt-imposed appellRtion OF yul-
garity. They work their mashes and pass
along in q twinkle, while l plod along
with the nameless rank and file beneath
their notice..
"Alasl" exclaimed the Private, as he
shook out his golden curls and closed one
eye significantly, II am doomed to end
my career without ever attaining celebrity
by glorious scandal" The nom dc
plume, Private, Is essentially plebian and
suggestive OF extreme poverty, obsCurity,
mediocrity, ignorance, stupidity, yulgarily
and worse. II is the negative OF lame.
wealth, distinction and honor. II It means
anything It Is a sneer at all this as vanity,
and no one who has probed the Priyate's
grim, sarcastic nature as have; can have
failed to find that this lies at the bottom
of, this Democratic name par excellence,
the nom de plume, Private" It Ia a
sneer in cold typel
II signifies all that and more, and II is
not a pleasant name to even plebeian ears,
and positively offensive to aristoCratic
ears, however large and capacious, No
wonder aristocrats with ladies never in.
troduce them 10 the Private, and 50 dis.
like the very word, and no wonder the
Private feels himself doomed to die In q
green, very green, old age, the happy hus.
band Of very happy wife, whose mutual
security was founded In obscurity. l
tuuukut HOm tuh VeuOr Vi Lib COnVbfBAs
ton that his pride was more severely
wounded over this than anything else
namely, that the officers and ladies
treated him with indifference and neglect,
for he is notdevoid OF aeli.Csteem, amount.
ing sometimes TO vanity.
A profound scholar, o man OF genius, an
acknowledged lawyer aud orator OF the
frst-Class, he feels himself quite the equal
Of any sensational lecturer or. preacher
who can create such iurore among the
ladies, officers and aristocracy. A man
who never touches cards, liquor or any
evil thing, he rebels against the false posi-.
ton into which his unfortunate pseudo.
nym has forced him, and Is not slow to
say that great Injustice Is done him by die.
eliminating thus against him because Of
his rank.
"Thank God" said hO as l rose TO leave,
"there Is one place in this world where
| can meet all these fina people, and the
finest Of them all on terms Of equality, and
that Is In the public press and from this
all the aristocrats and blue hloods out Of
h-l never can ostracise me. No, nor all
In hi, either"