Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1886-03-12
HuMDERGIN.

Mr., EDITURE:
AS bruther Bill Rogus an cuzen
Sol hes bin riten to you an your nu-
meres perscribers from this ancient
old place, thought I'd rite you sum
if you wont charge me fur printer
it, fur my ole oman lowed she
spccked you would charge, as charge
ing was whut most people lived on
these hard times. An she lowed il
wus nifty slim thing TO live on, and
that chargin wus nifty hot thing,
cos | wus a chargin one NV them
things what all NV the dudes up 10
yer town gifts sody water outen, ]
furgit the name NV the drafted thing,
but it has got leetle tubes stickin
out al aroun it fur the merlases all
the other good things what they put
in the sOdy water to make man cri
like he had lost his ralerode ticket,
by putten his head outen the winder.
But to come to the pint. AS l wus
gwine TO tell you about it, l pord
some sulfuretical aced in the drafted
thing all it got mad an blowed the
aced all over me. You orter seen me
cut the pigin wing aroun thar
didn't kere fur gittin burnt myself,
but the gol darned stuff got on my
new brown gomestick shert, what
Peggy sold gander egs and Dyed fur
me, as a sorter birth da present fur
Chrismuss, and l wus HORRIBLY
proud nv it, too, yer bet, becase Peg
gy don't by me fine shert like that
wus every year, and the drafted stuff
burnt wun hundred and twentie
holes in it, besides the wun Peggy
LET fur me to git in all then tn git out
at, so yur see it had wun hunderd all
twentie-wun holes in it. So l tole
Peggy if she'd hunt up sum GIMME
egs all put in the balance of her geese
egs an by me wun wat amt got any
holes in it, I'd swap with her, an she
lowed mabey she would git me wun
to war this winter an keep the wun
what has got them wun hunderd an
twentie-wun holes in it fur me to
war next summer.
Mr.. Editure, l wus up to yer town
on last Sunday an wus walkin an a
complementin up an down the paw
ments an chawin fiat terbacker an
casten Sleeps ize at yer town gals an
l most wished l wus young agin, fur
| no thar is floor purity gals what
lives in a hundred yards of each
luther on the street the niger boy
told me wus Greanyille streat, but
Pm not a gwine to tell you whut
figures thar is on the house. | no
thar wus wun fel in love with me
rite along in sucksession, an that wus
what makes me wish was young
agin. Gan woodent kere no way
if Peggy wus sum other good mans
better half) Talkin about mems
better HAYES, Peggy makes me think
somc times that she is at least three
forths of me an nifty nj the other
forth. Mr.. Editure, yer must not say
anything about whit I've sed about
Peggy, so she can git hold of it. II
you do the next thing she gifts hold
of will be my skelp lock, an thar'll
be trouble furyer umble sarvent, an
you no L am too nice a man to git in
trouble with my wife.
Mr.. Culture, Peggy sed she intend
id TO come up to yer town with me
next time l cum, .becase she lowed
that bruther Bill carried sister Ma.
Indy with him whin he coined up Ia
yer town, and she lowed that bruthel
Billie put up at the Phenix Hotel
An she lowed she didn't want Ma
Indy TO git ahead of hur, an she
wanted to go TO jus sho Malindy how
10 nut OH sliln an act nnalntu hu