Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1886-08-12
a WARNING EXAMPLE.
Thrilling Story of the Value of Notices
in Territorial Journalism.


in Territorial Journalism.
One or two persons have suggested
that this paper would get along better
# it had motto. They may be right.
'Free and Unshackled," ''Our Aim
the Peoples Welfare" and Truth is
Mighty and Occasionally Prevails
are all good, secondhand notices,
somewhat worn along the edges but
still in pretty fair condition. We have
also thought of several Others, includ-
ing keep off the Grass" "Sic Semper
Tyrannis" and "Free Thought, Free
Speech and Free Lunch" but have so
far refrained from running up any of
them. We have been influenced in the
matter somewhat by the remembrance
of one II. Junius Browne.
Mr. Browne was a pale, scholarly
bubble who came out to the frisky and
vivacious West to engage in the hon
orable profession of journalism. He
settled down at place called Hicks
Hollow and brought out the Weekly
Palladium. Right under the head he
put this motto in large, square,
shouldered type: Here Shall the
Press the Peoples Right Maintain;
Unawed by Influence and Unbribed by
Gain" On another page he an
nounced: mo Pent-up Utica Con-
tracts our Powers" "Policy is an Idol
Principle God" Founded by H.
| Junius Browne. Cordwood, Fresh
Hay and other Country Produce taken
the same as Cash.
Junius ran the paper along during
the summer and it began to look as if
he would soon have to begin on diet
of notices. He was canvassing the
prospect of roast motto on toasted
platitude when the fall campaign slid
in on the community.
The Palladium began to talk about
the best men for the different offices
when one day candidate for county
sheriff came in and said:
"Mr. Browne, air you goin to sup
port me for sheriff.
"Well, Mr. Snoozenberry, really
couldn't say as yet--you know the
Palladium always supports the best
man and don't know either of you"
"Well, I'll admit | aint the best man,
the other feller is near onto fifty
pounds heavier than me and hard
hitter but I'm quicker on the u y.
Now eff l sign for yer paper and pay in
advance will my quail lications fer the
Office be all hunkP"
'Well, you see"
"S'pose | make it two copies?"
Eyes, but"
"Call it three, but that's the best
can do"
"Oh, well that'll be all right-Fm
convinced you're the man for the
place."
So the Palladium poured out its
wrath on McDeadeye, the other candi-
date. McDeadeye was an unfit man
for the important office; McDeadeye
had record back in the States which
would ill bear the searching calcium
light of public investigation; and the
worst of it was McDeadeye couldn't
get it. But McDeadeye did get it and
Snoozenberry went where the wood
bine climbeth.
A few days after McDeadeye came
into the office of the Weekly Palladium
and said:
'Mr Browne, b'lieve you referred
to my past record in that Dismal Wal
NV yournp"
'I-I-I d-don't quite remember
Colonel McD-d-deadhead, p-p-p'r'ap'
/ did, it's all right though, Colonel. ,
"Oh yes, it's all right, er will be
that's what l come in fer-to make i
all right. B'lieve you said you'd lik,
ter see my recordP"
"Y-y-yes, l did say that"
"Well, sir, here it is, six parts to it
and it speaks for itself-just waitin;
for the formerality of an introduction
when it'll talk right out. Mr.: Browne
this Is Mr.. Colt, who will address yol
for few moments on the vital issue
of the day!"
Then he began to shoot. When tn
first gun was empty he threw ii at tn
printer who had crawled under the i'm
posing stone and produced another
saying: 81 have the pleasure NV inter
ducing to yer favorable notice MI
Smith-&-Wesson, the well-knowi
tenor, who will entertain you with
little vocal musicw
Another slice of bombardment an
he said: 'Ladies and gentlemen,
know you will all be pleased to NEE
Mr. Remington, gentleman con
nected with the navy, who will give hi
, lecture, entitled Deep-sea Sounding
in the Human System accompanie
by illustrationsm
At the conclusion of this speaker
remarks he picked up the shootin
ircAs, kicked the printer through tn
upper sash of window and went Out
A few days after another man too
hold of the Palladium. He didn
know much about the business but
. changed the name of the paper an
jerked off the notices. The mex
week it came out like this:
, HICKS HOLLOW HOOTER.
IT HooTs FOR ALI