davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14
WIZARD OF THE TREASURY.

4 Man Who Does tho Work OF Three Or0s
mary Government CLERKS.
In all the departments there are em-
ployes who hold their positions. not on
the strength of their political influence.
out upon the strength of their peculiar
abilities. Among these is Patrick
Ryrnes, of the division of loans in the
Treasury Department. For dozen
years, not an interest check has left the
Department that has not passed
through his hands. The interest on
the bond is paid quarterly, and to in
sure absolute certainty that none Of
the checks goes astray. it is absolutely
necessary that they should all be
sealed by one individual. As the
holders of bonds are represented in
number by many thousands it would
take three ordinary clerks to do the
work, but Byrnes does the mailing
The checks are brought
down from the loan division and piled
on his desk like stacks of cord-wood.
Each one must get in its right envel-
ope, which has been previously ad.
dressed; then Byrnes begins.
With no mechanical assistance ex-
cept wet sponge, he starts in to do
the sealing. Those who have seen
Blitz or Hermann handle pack of
playing cards before q wonder-stricken
audience, might have some idea OF the
way that Byrnes rifles the checks into
the envelopes. Fifty minute. How
he does it no one knows. tits sleight
of hand, but SO rapidly performed that
the eye can not follow the movement
Thump, thump. thump all day long
and at the close of the departmental
day he has filled three store boxes with
sealed envelopes. Does he ever make
a mistake? Well, no. The checks
vary from $50 to $1,000 and single
mistake on his part might cost him q
years salary. 1t is safe to say he
never makes one. Of the thousands of
people who quarterly receive these in
terest checks few know of the wizard
through whose hands they have passed.
louisville Post
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14
AMERICAN CHURCHES.
A Plea for Less Decorative Illusions oAs
More Solidity and Durability.

A Plea for Less Decorative Illusions aa1
More Solidity and Durability.
However well-planned our churches
are-and many of them are admirably
arranged and excellently planned
their interiors suffer by the same de-
fects as the external design. Repose.
dignity and simplicity are rare quail
tiles. Gaudiness and over-decoration
are frequent, every inch of wall space
being tormented with stenciled orna-
mentation, often in LOUD and inhar-
monious colors. The different parts
Of the decoration ofttimes neutralize
each other, and give no rest or salts
faction to the eye. Sometimes, on the
ether hand, these interiors are pain
fully bare and white, cold and dazzling
to the eye. To steer between these
two evils-to secure richness without
ostentation. or simplicity without bare.
ness-is not easy, nor is it often done.
Fortunately, ambitious flights INTO the
domain OF figure-painting are rarely
attempted; for the failure is apt to be
deplorable and ludicrous-
Far less excusable, however, than
merely artistic faults, is the prevalence
of sham in the construction of our
churches. One would imagine that
here. ct least. honesty and sObriety
should prevail And yet there is no
class of buildings, except theaters,
where limitations and shams are SO
general. Sanded wooden pinnacles on
stone spires and buttresses; sanded
wooden cornices and balustrades;
cheap pine pews and wainscoting
painted and grained to simulate costly
woods; brick columns plastered to re-
semble stone, and lath and plaster
vaulting, pretending to be of masonry
these are all SO common as to be al
most matters of course. They are used
to produce a false impression of rich
ness and beauty, just rs a vain woman
wears paste iewelry; and there is
little difference between the two
motives Docs it never occur to
oar churches that it is morally
wrong thus TO pretend to a wealth
and resources that do not exist And
yet, did they but know it, the eye
gains far more satisfaction froa sim.
pile, ll-proportioned. honestly-built
interior, where all is solid and genuine,
than from q richly-decorated interior,
where all is fraud of stucco and paint.
Their search after beauty is in the
wrong direction. since it ignores the
principle that the highest beauty in
architecture is based on good construc'
ton. A great reform is here necessary
the builders tricks and the decorator
illusions must be suppressed. Solidity,
durability, permanence. resistance to
the ravsges of fire and time, must be
recognized as essentials On church build
ing, and far more Important than much
gliding and 'frescoing." Until the
moral principle involved lis recognized
these disreputable frauds and shams
will continue. 4. Il. r.. Hamli1,
IN N J.. Independent.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14
They Let Him Ride.

Scene-F street car, Saturday after
aoon. Dramatis persona - Three
young ladies, Treasury clerks, and
ultra-exquisite dude, strangers al
around.
Dude, to young lady nearest fare
-s.Aw, may 1 twouble you. Miss,
to pwas my fawaiah?" handing the
young lady a quarter, which she
''dwops" into the ''bwox."
Dude fdgets about few moments,
and then, addressing the young lady,
ssys-sAw, pawdon me, Miss, but
that was a qwartah you dwopped in
the bwox.n
Young lady, graciously-+'Oh, was
itp Well, L guess they'll let you ride
for a quarter
Dude sucks his cane and tries to
think.-Washington Critic.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14
CHOICE EXTRACTS.

No man is matriculated to the ar
of life till he has been well tempted
George Eliot.
The innocence of the intention
,abates nothing of the mischief Of the
example.-Baptist Weekly.
The common-places of our faith
are the food upon which our faitl
will most richly feed.-Dr. Il Mac
Laren.
One of THE most important dis
tinctions of'our judgments is thaGsomt
of them are intuitive, others grounded
,on -argument--T. Reid.
My will, not Thine. be ame,'
turned Paradise into desert Thy
will, not mine, be done,' turned tht
desert into a paradise, and made Geth
semane the gate of Heaven.-Pressemse
If cruelty has its expiationS ane
its ,remorses, generosity has its chance:
and its turns of good fortune as i
Providence reserved them for fitting
occasions. that nable hearts may nol
be Observation-Disclosures.
When all our hopes are gone,
'Tis well our hands must still keep telling 81
For others sake:
And he is b!est, indeed, who learns 70 make
The joy of sothers. cure his own heartache.
-Erchdnge.
Moral courage is more worth hay
ing than physical: mot only because il
is higher virtue, but because the
demand for it is more constant. PLY.
steal courage is a virtue which is almost
always put away in the lumber-roonL
Moral courage is wanted day by day
Charles BurtOn.
The greatest man is he who chooses
the right with invincihle resolution.
who resists the .sorest, item tations from
within and without. who bears the
heaviest burdens cheerfully. who is
calmest in storms, most fearless under
menace and frowns. whose reliance on
truth, on virtue, on God, IL most un.
faltering Claiming
You can not stay the 4hell in its
flight; after it has left the mortar it
goes on to its mark and thereexplodes,
dealing destruction all around. Just
as Little can You stay the consequences
of SIN after it has been committed.
You may repent of it. you may be for
given for it but sill it goes on its
deadly and desolating way. Il has
passed entirely beyond your reach:
once done it can not be undone.-Wm.
N Taylor.
The Bible is precious torehosse.
and the Magma Charta OF a Christian.
There he reads Of his Heavenly Fathers
love. and of his dying Saviour's leg
acies. There he sees a map of His
travels through the wilderness, and .
landscape, too. of Canaan. And whes
he climbs on Pisgah's tops. and views
the promised land, his heart begins to
burn, delighted with the blessed pros
pect, and amazed at the rich and free
salvation. But q mere professor,
though decent one, looks ON the Bible
rs dull book, and peruses it with
such indifference as you would read
the title-deeds belonging to another
mans estste.-Berrid9e.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14
A Contemplate SwindIe.

Tom Anjerry. somewhat dissipated
student at the University of Texas. re-
marked to his bosom friend. Bill
Yardly:
I'm in streak of bad luck
What has happened to you?'
MY uncle has just voluntarily sent
me check for twenty-five dollars
Where is the bad luck about that?''
You see / was just going to borrow
fifty dollars from him, and now l can't
in deeency do it The old scoundrel
has headed me of. I've been fleeced
out of twenty-five dollars BY the III
villain "-ISSas SJtings.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

IT sounds like paradox to say that q
man is laying up money when he is sailing
it down.-Chicago Journal.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

THE biggest gum-boil on record has been
discovered in q mucilage factory.-Xer-
chant Irdueler.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14
Tennyson's ..AIay Queen. =

Tennyson's ''AIay Queen"
Whoknows but if the beautiful girl who
died SO y0ung had been blessed with DR..
Pierce's ''Favorite PrescTiptionn she might
have reigned on many another bright May
day. The "Favorite Prescription" is Ger.
tain cure for all those disorders to which
females are liable.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

A NEW and improved post-hole has been
patented. 1t must be of a kind that can be
taken rp and cut into lengths.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

DID it ever occur to you what funny
thing a postage-stamp is. Even the de-
partment can't sell it after they cancel it
-BOsf0n Budget.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

MAMMA-"Frankie, are you eating those
green apples again:'' frankie = No,
mamma, Pm eating some others ''-Har-
gers Young People.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

THAT wall is plumb" said a mason t.
bis foreman. but that fellow who put in
water and gas pipes is plumber."-N r
Ledger.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

Is NOT q dye, and will not stain or injur<
the skin. Halls Hair Remover.
Dumb Ague can be speedily cured by tax
ing Ayers Ague Cure. Try it.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

WHEN we were at school We used to wish
that history would repeat itself. as we so
often heard it would do.-LOreU Citi=en.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

If amictcd with Sore Eyes, use DIR. Isaac
Th0mpson's Eye Water. Druggists sell It &c
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

MANY a singers voice has been wrecked
At C.-Whi eli Ill Times.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

Two HEADS ought to be better than one
-Four lips are certainly better than two.-
,Somervik Journal.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

Ex-MxvoR LArRoBE, Baltimore, Nd. says
the best cough medicine is Red Star Cough
Cure. Twenty-Five cents q bottle.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

IT is curious fact that whenever Brit
ism Parliament gets into hot water it is
sure to dissolve
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

THIRTEEN is an unlucky number 1T q
boarding hOs Sc table where there is only
dinner enough FOR twelve.-N o. Picayune
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

A sUHT of armor was the old-tashioned
knight dress.-Boston Bullstix.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

TIE best cough medicine is Piso's Cure
Cor Consumption. Sold everywhere. 25c.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

A GROCER advertises something new in
coffee" We are glad that beans have had
their day, anyway.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

MOONLIGHT walks with your best girl are
nothing but lovely strolls.-Loaceu Courier.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

BETWEEN our Thermometers and colleges
the degree crop Is drawing ahead Of the
peach ditto.-EUe.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

A PIG would seem the best subject for
could he killed first and cured Afterwards.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

FABRICS AND CCTICLEs are both rendered
marvelously white by GLENN's SULPHUR
Soar.
Hills HAR AND WHIsKER DYE, Black or
Brown. Soc
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

AVE4Moxf man has invented q sleigh
made OF paper Nothing new about that.
We have used . paper cutter for years
ZsE1as SifUsQs
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

GUsHALINA writes: ut tortures me to
pen the words" Well, il the pen tortures
yoa, reciprocate by putting it on the rack.
-NatioH& Weekly.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14
BROWNS
IRON
B/TIERS
W/II "TRE

WILL IOA6
HEADACHE
INDIGESTION
BILIOUSNESS
DYSPEPSIA
NERVOUS PROSTRATION
MALARIA t
CHILLS AND FEVERS
TIRED FEELING
GENERAL DEBILITY
PAIN IN THE BACK & SIDES
IMPURE BLOOD
CONSTIPATION
FEMALE INFIRMITIES
RHEUMATISM
NEURALGIA
KIDNEY AND LIVER
TROUBLES
FOR SALE BY ALL DRUGGISTS
The Genuine has Trade Marx and crossed Red
TAKE NO OTHER.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

WHERE arc all the bad actors! Read
he answer in tho stars. Nv O. Pieavxne
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

SAFE, permanent and complete are the
cures Of bilious and intermittent diseases,
made by Prickly Ash BitterA Dyspepsia.
general debility. habitual constipation, Gy-
or and kidney complaints are speedily Grad
icated from tho system. It disinfects,
cleanses and eliminates all malaria. Health
and vigor are obtained more rapidly and
permanently by the use Of this great nat
ural antidote than by any other remedy
heretofore known. As q blood purifier and
tonic it brings health, renewed energy and
vitality to a worn and diseased body,
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

In . telegraph Office: "That makes nine
words madame" Then / car send an.
oeherr' Certainly" "Wec; kindly
write important on the envelops."-Frsee
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

DoS'r hawk, and blow, and spit, but usl
DR.. Sage's Catarrh Remedy.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

II the doctor orders bark, has not the
patient right to growl.-M 7. Ledger.
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

TIE raciest articles are written by hofso
Teporters.-Iexas Sithnga
Thomas County cat. [volume] (Colby, Kan.) 1885-1891, 1886-10-14

It Should - 0snsfally Known
that the multitude Of diseases of scrofu-
lous nature generally proceed from tor
pid condition of the liver. The blood be-
comes impure because the liver does not
act properly and work OF the poison from
the system. and the certain results arc
blotches, pimples, eruptions, swellings
tumors ulcers and Kindred affections, or
settling upon the lungs and poisoning their
delicate tissues. until liberation. breaking
down, and consumption ID established DR..
Pierce's "Golden Medical Discovery" will,
by acting upon the liver and purifying the
blood, cure all these diseases
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1886-09-22
lis Tricks are known.

New York World.
The Republican party is in the
position Of u conjurur whose tricks
have been found out. It's perform.
ancos no longer deceive, and there
fore fail even 10 divert the specta.
tors,
For many years tho political
pFestidigitators Of that party went
annually through with The trick Of
saving the results Of the war"
But The people at last discovered
that nobody wished TO disturb
those results, and that the trick
sters paid no attention to them
after the elections were over. Ii
was next announced that the only
skill Of these same professors Of
tleight Of hand could prevent the
dreadful Democrats from "pnying
the rebel debt, Provisioning the
rebel soldiers" denying to Union
veterans the just recompense for
their losses, and from destroying
The credit Of the nation. A brief
period Of Democratic rule, although
not free from mistakes, has proved
to the dupes Of these men the utlef
abSurdity Of their claim. Not only
have no outrageous measures been
proposed, but more money was dis.
bursed TO Union soldiers in pen.
sions last year than in any year Of
Republican administration, while
the complaints Of the critics have
been, not that the Treasury is too
weak but that II is too strong.
The standing trick Of all the list
The Veritable chestnut" that no
bell can banish-iS the Republican
claim that ii is the party Of econ.
omy. The jugglery Of the figures
0y which this IA sought 10 be car.
ried through is transparent to all
observers who are not Of the blind.
est Of the blind-those who will
not see. II is persisted in, despite
the fact that a Republican Senate
increased by more than 100000
the appropriation bills passed BY a
Democratic House, besides adopt.
ing independent measures that
would, if passed, have rendered
necessary a large increase Of taxa.
tion.
The old tricks are all discovered,
and the professors Of the political
black art may as well prepare to
go out Of the show business, II Is
as fatal TO a party as to an individ.
ual who lives by ledgerdemain Ia
commit the mortal blundSr Of be
ing found out.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1886-09-22
"rhe Llille Ioker.n

The Republicans Of the Fourth
Congressional District, in which
District a large prohibition senti,
penl prevails incorporated a 1--WE
favor the submission !" Of an amend.
ment, &c. In the First Congress.
ionsl District, there is a large Ger,
man element opposed to the sub
mission Of q prohibition amend.
lnen!, and behold! the Republican
platform is as silent as the grave
upon the subject. 1t wouldn't do
to antagonize the German element
Of Wheeling in the First District,
but in the Fourth District il
wouldn't hurt to give the people a
little prohibition soft solder, so in
it goes, and this is the party that
continually pirates of its STEADY
adherence to principle" The truth
is that the Republican party has
no principles TO adhere to, II is u
party Of deception and fraud,
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1886-09-22
Why -Four Men Are Happy In
n. Boston,

B. Frank Burpee was reported ID
have had a snug prize in The LOui.
siana State Lottery, and we ascer.
tanned the facts: Mr.. B., n saloon
keeper, No. s Granite ST., s. Boston
John Dugan, with the Boston &
Albany Railroad, and two brothers,
Charles and Henry Philbrick team.
sterS, previous TO the August 10Th
drawing Of The Louisiana State
Lottery Company, each subscribed
81, and purchased four one.Gfh
tickets, one Of which, No. 35 .GSl
drew one fifth Of the secund capital
prize s250 600, 81 $50 for each share
loss Adams Expressago. Mr.. B,
Frank Burpee is a married man,
having a wife and one child The
other three are single men, % to &c
years Of age, sober, steady, and in.
dustriOus, and will make good use
Of the money.-BOston (Mas..) Com,
merciaI and Shipping List, August 81
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1886-09-22
moi a Ghost ofa Chance.

St. Marys oraclea
The republicans of this district
have made their nomination fol
congressman in this district anlhis
name is John A. Hutchinsrn, oi
Wood, While Mr.. Hutchinson is,
so far as we know, a good lawyer
aud q gentleman Of ability, he is at
the same time one Of The must bit.
ter radical republicans in the state;
one Of the men who upheld the in.
quitous registration law which dis
franchised ono half Of the citizens
Of the state. OF course there il not
u ghost Of a show Of his election,
He is one Of these men who will be
able 10 about carry the vote Of his
own party and no more, as every
democrat will vuLe his own ticket
when Mr.. Hutchinson is on The
other, One Of Johns characteristic
speeches will make that certain.
There is no easier man 10 beat in
the district. If our republican
friends are satisfied with their
choice, we are.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1886-09-22
The, Boolts i0peneId.

= 2 ~
The Democratic psfly, through
AZ press and ~ its speakers, has
declared fcr tho past ten year, pub
licly that II II could turn the ras.
calls out and get AZ the books ii
could demonstra!e that the Repub.
licap party in IL long lease Of pow.
er, had, through It's various officers
by defalcations il collections and
disbursemeotst stolen millions Of
the peoples money. Although un.
able'to make bnLa partial exami
nation d the books covering The
period Of Republican control, the
fact is already disclosed that the
balance due BY manyOfthe disbnr.
sing and receiving officers since
1851 for which they have dsfaulted
tothe Government, Is over $1,000.
900. AS this lis. embraces less
than one.half Of the Government
accounts, Il Is fair 10 assume that q
complete and thorough examina.
tiOn willishow equal amount Of
defalCation, 10 which event the
loss sustained by the Government
through Republican theft and dis
honesty in this manner will not
fsll short Of sci, OOO,0OO-an aver
age ofsl,O 10000, for each year Of
Radical rulel This list, moreover,
does not include the Poslolfice De.
partment where Dorsey, Bradley
and Che s,ar-ronte thieves figured.
Nor does il include the ezpendi
tures Of the War Department,
where Howgates, Hodges and other
Kindred spirits revealed, nor the
expenditures in tho Navy Depart.
meht, where the RobesOn gang
paid more for The repair Of old ships
than they originally cosI, aud had
no ships left. And il is most like.
lyonly the beginning Of the reyel.
atoms that! are to come. Is it any
wonder that the people reyolted at
this sort Of management of their
affairs and hurled the thieves from
power2 m
The Republican organs were but
recently manifesting u spirit of i'm.
patience at the delay following the
first peep into the books, and pre-.
tended7lo believe that upon exam.
ination Of the national ledgers, a
Democratic Administration would
be obliged to confess that every.
thing was right as right could be.
The delinquent and defaulting Of
ticeholders were not 20 impatient,
however, and about the only con.
fessions which the country will
have the pleasure Of hearing will
probably cone from tho unpunish
ed thieves who may yet be amena
bic to the law when brought to &C.
count for their robbery and plumber
as all good citizens hope they may
be. An earnest effort is now being
made 10 collect the stolen balances
already asceTtained, andwith much
greater success, it is said, than was
anticipated, owing to the long
lapse Of time.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1886-09-22

Russia Gays she will soon indicate
her intentions in the Bulgarian of.
fair. But Russia has been indica.
ting her intentions for a good ma.
ny years already-tO march on to
Constantinople just as fast as posi-.
bic.