Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1886-03-26
"a LITTLE NONSENSE"

Young men who think their sweet
hearts are divine, love to make divinity
students Of themselves every night ih
the week.-Ch Chicago Ledger,
"A Western settlers cabin was re-
Gently swept entirely away by tor
nado, This is what we should call
carrying q house by storm.-Prairi.
Farmer.
"A correspondent has discovered
that there were dudes in ancient Rome.
That is all right, but we feel more
grieved over the fact that they didn't
stay therc.-Phiiadelphia Cali, lid
Mrs. Homespun is delighted with
her sons proficiency upon tho piano.
forte. why" she says, 81 ohnny can
play almost anything and lie doesn't
have to take both hands TO it, as some
Of your great players are Obliged to
do. ."--Boston Transcripts.
-"My horse can answer question
very plainly" remarked Jockey.
when l ask him If he wants oats he
mods his head up and down. That
means yea" Suppose he does not
want oats, how does he express him
selfp" "By asimpleneigh. ."-httsturgh
Chronicle. .....-..
"A Michigan mans life has been
saved by silk necktie backed with
pasteboard stopping a pistol ball. Poo
pie who had supposed that silk neck
tie backed with pasteboard could serve
no other purpose than to hide soiled
linen from the eye Of the public will
now see how greatly they were mis-
taken.-.Boston Transcript.
r -Dumley bad related a side-splitting
Joke, and the company laughed con-
sumedly. Featherly seemed to be par
ticulariy amused. "Rather good, eh.
Featherlyp" said Dumley. very much
pleased. "Y-yes, indeed" replied
Featherly, as soon as ho could artich-
late. "lt's g-good every time, Dunn
ley-g-good every time. IN y IN
dependent.
Old lady Ito street gamin); "Llt-
tie boy, don't you want to join the Sun
day school, and grow up to be good
mani" Little boy: "What Sunday
school Is ita" Old lady: "The Method
ist.'u Little boy: mo. / tried the
Metbodises LAS year, an didn't git
nuthin' but stick o. broken candy an
apple. I'm goin' to try the 'Piscopal
this year. ."-Golden Days. .
I AN eminent scientist attributes the
remarkable longevity of q woman who
recently died at the age of one hundred
and nine to the fact that she mover
wore q high bonnet in theater. We
also understand that the vigorous
health of Philadelphia man how in
his ninety-ninth year is due to tho fact
that he never went out between the
acts to make astronomical observa-
tions through glass. ."--Moristotoa
Herald.
-Magistrate-You are accused Of
asssulting Pete johnson. Prisoner
Yes, yo'honah. Pete lowed l wuzzent
no gemman. But / only hit him
wunce, sab, at tho ce'nah Of Fo'ty-seo-
ond street an Fou'th avenue. Mag
isuhVc-rO rOIty-SecOnu eicotr Ahu
policeman Gays he picked him up ut the
corner Of Twenty-third street. Pris-
oner-Am dat SOP Well. l didn't
mean ter hit him as had as dat, Jcdge.
Deed, ] didn't.-.M Y. Times.
Said Dallas, Tex, woman to a
female friend: "You should make your
husband quit chewing tobacco. Hyou
tell him to quit, he will give 1t up,
suppose. Eyes, II ! ask him to, but
l am not going to ask him to quit
chewing tobacco" "When no kisses
you, don't the taste Of tobacco make
you slokP" Eyes, but / want him to
keep on chewing. He kisses three or
four other women, and the tobacco
makes them sicker than 1t does me, for
I've got used to it already 7sza'
GifiaQa