Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1886-02-12

the grand entry al circus. 'Peared 10
me that all the gas in the house was
turned on at once, things got so bright,
and hilt up my head, ready to look
any man in the face, and not afraid Of
nothing. 1t was circus. and brass
band, and big ball all a-going on at
the same time. He lit into them keys
like a thousand of brick; he gave IN no
rest day or night; he set every livin'
joint in me a-goin' and not being able
to stand it any longer, l jumped, sprane
onto my seat, and jest hollered:
GO it. Rube,"
Every blamed man, woman and child
in the house riz on me and shouted,
''Put him out!' "Put him OUT"
"Put your great -grandmother's griz-
zly-gray greenish cat into the middle OF
next month";" says. "Tech me if you
dare! paid my money, aud you just
come a-nigh me!'
With that several policemen run up.
and had TO simmer down. But could
fl [ any man fool that laid hands on
me, for WAS bound to hear Ruby out
or die.
He had changed his tune again. He
hop light ladies and he tip-tosd due
from end to end of the keyboard. He
played soft and low and solemn. heard
the church-bells over the hills. The
candles of heaven was lit, one by one;
saw the stars rise. The great organ
OF eternity began to play from the
worlds end to the worlds end, and all
the angels went to prayers.
Then the music changed 10 water, full
of feeling that couldn't be thought, and
began to drop-drip, drOp-drip, drop,
clear and sweet, like tears of joy falling
into lake Of glory. 1t was sweeter
than that. 1t WAS as sweet rs a sweet
heart sweetened with white sugar mixed
with powdered silver and seed dia-
munds. 1t was 700 sweet. | tell you
the audience cheered. Rubin he kinder
bowed like he wanted to say, "Much
obleeged, but I'd rather you wouldn't
interrupt me-"
He stopt moment or TWO 10 ketch
breath. Then he got mad. He run his
fingers through his hair, he showed up
his sleeves, he opened his coat-tailS IA
leetle further, he drug up his stool, he
leaned over, and, sir, he just went for
that old pianner. He slapt her face, he
boxed her Jaws, he pulled her nose, he
pinched her ears, and he scratched her
cheeks, until she fairly yelled. He
knockt her down, and he stampt on her
shameful. She beloved, she bieated
like a calf, she howled like hound, she
squealed like pig, she sbrieked like
rat, and then he wouldn't let her up. He
ran Il quarter stretch down the low
grounds Of the bass, till he got clean in
the bowels Of the earth, and you heard
thunder galloping after thunder,
through the hollows and caves OF perdi
ton; and then he fox chased his right
hand with his left till he got way out Of
the treble into the clouds, where the
notes was finer than the pints of cambric
needles, and you couldn't hear nothing
but the shadders of them. And then he
wouldn't let the old pianner 90. He
forward two'd, he crost over first gem
tleman, he chassade right and left, back
to your places, he all hands'd around,
ladies' to the right, promenade all, In
and out, here and there, back and forth,
up and down, perpetual motion, double
twisted and turned and tackled and tan
gled into forty eleven thousand double
bow knots.
By jinks 1t was mystery. And then
he wouldn't let the old pianner 60. He
ferht up his right wing, he fetched up
his left wing, he fetched up his centre,
he fetched up his reserves. He fired by
file, he fired by platoons, by company.
by regiments, and by brigAdes. He
opened his cannon-siege guns down
thar, Napoleons here, twelve FOUNDERS
yonder-big guns, little guns, middle
sized guns, round shot, shells, shrap-
nels, grape, canister, mortars, mines,
and magazines, every livn' battery and
bomb a-going at the same time. The
house trembled, the lights danced.
the walls sbuk, the floor come up, the
ceiling come down, the sky split. the
ground rocked-heavens and earth, Gre
! alton, sweet potatoes, ninepences, glory,
ten-penny nails, Sampson in simmon-
tree, lump Tompson in tumbler-cart,
! roodIe-oodle- e-Oodle- -oolle-rudJle-uddle
! uddle. uddle - addle-addle-addle-ad
riddle iddle- le-iddle-reedle-e -eedle-
edle-p-r-r-r-r-rlang Bang I!
lang per-lang p-r-I-r-r Bang !
With that bang! he lifted himself
bodily into the air. and he come down
with his knees, his ten fingers, his ten
toes. his elbows, and his nose, striking
every single, solitary key on the pianner
at the same time. The thing busted
and went off into seventeen hundred
and fifty-seven thousand five hundred
and forry-two hemi-demi-semi quiyers.
! and knowed no more.
When come to, were under ground
/ Oyster Bay, a treating Yankee that /
neyerlaid eyes on before. and never ex-
pect to again. Day was breaking by
the time got TO the st. Nicholas Hotel,
and l pledge you my word | did not
/ know nv name. The man asked m.
the number Of my room, and told him,
'sHot music on the half-shell for two"
DR.. George Bogby.