Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1886-01-04
vICrvKiA AFTER CLEVELAND.
The Indian Empress Sends Proposal
OF Marriage to the Yankee Presi-

The Indian Empress Sends Proposal
Of Marriage to the Yankee Presi- !
dent.
To THE EDITOR OF THE TIMES (:
Having friend at the Court Of St.
James, have received private let
ter, the gist of which is contained be-
low. Imav state, however, that said
friend is person of a very vivid i'm
agination, and his communication
must be taken cum grano salis-and
very large grain at that
1t is not leap-year, and proposal
of marriage coming from a blushing
female may seem rather forward on
the part of the female, but as this par
ticuler female has always possessed
considerable amount of gall, this will
pass unnoticed. Queens ought not to
be judged by the common standard,
and another thing, the Queen in ques-
tion-and would-b be bride-has been
there before and knows how it is done.
What the to-be, or not to be husband
may think about it, has yet to be
learned; but l would warn Grover
not to forget the we'll known line that
He'll knows ne fury like woman scornsd
and keeping that in mind govern him
self accordingly:
The friends of the widow Mrs. John Bull
Assembled in consultation,
To devise plan whereby old Vic.
Should have legalized oscillation.
She had mourned for Albert long enough:
And now like King David of old,
They couldn't put royal buds enough on
10 keep her from getting cold.
Ard the vulgar crowd had been making
Concerning the late John Brown. marks
And Her most gracious Majesty
Who wore the British crown.
| OF course we know amongst ourselves
That the family name of Guelph
Is famous for aught but--really, now;
You know how it is yourself.
Thus spake the gallant Salisbury
As he winked to Lord Churchill;
And the rest of the noble Lords caught on
And laughed with right goodwill.
The brave Lord Randolph then got up
And swcre that he wouldn't have
Any more German Princes
Put onto the pension staff.
. That they were all poor Lazarus
And England had spent large sums
, Upon old victoria's daughters
When they married these royal buns.
That he himself was English Peer.
And hal be ter blood in his veins
Than all of their royal nibs combined-
And he knew he had more brsins;- ,
That his wife was free-born american,
And lady Of good repute:
She could trace her descent to Eden's Queen,
8 Was virtuous, handsome and cute.
r And he thought, with all dan difference
I To the noble Lords around,
That heavyweight Yankee President
: Was not every day to be found.
He wished to say. and he said IT now
v That he wanted no more of the race (Pri nee
Who traced their descent to some bastard
Whose mother had fallen from grace.
So he moved that csblegram be sent
To the land of the brave and the free,
Asking If President Cleveland
Would hitch on to the widowv.f
The vote was put to the Cabinet
r And carried by Acclamation.
I So the royal message was duly sent,
And received by the Yankee Nation.
This unlocked. for honor doubled
our bachelor President all up. He
had never thought of marrying; but
to be proposed to by the Queen Of
Great Britain and Ireland, Empress
of India, and mother of ready-made
family all fully grown, that was sub.
ject worthy of consideration. He
must see the ehivalrous Bayard about
: it. He does see the illustrious Score
> tary, and the decision they arrive al
: will be chronicled in the near future
LOCBIEL.