St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1886-06-07
THE TRAVELLERS CLUB.

THE TRAVELLERS CLUB.
"a pretty country girl got the best of me
once" exclaimed a Peoria man. "And I'll
never forget it, as the little incident taught
me u lesson that has been OF great benefit to
me. After that affair never offered my seat
in the car to a girl; 1 either give her the
whole seat or keep it all myself.
at was the morning of the Fourth of July,
and was Gu my way home to Peoria from
Rock Island to spend the day. When we left
Rock Island the cars were not crowded. but
as the train approached Peoria every seat but
mine was occupied by two persons. We
stopped at little station. very bright
country girl and her gawky lover got on. She
came into the car where was seated. ] saw
her look at the vacant pl,c beside me, aud
Immediately thought l would invite her to
share my seat.
'She was really very pretty, with simple
white dress on that enhanced by its simplicity
and purity her natural color. 1 thought of
what an impression l could make on her, and
how could worry that green, lank lout that
came in with her.
II asked her to share my seat, she giving
me good opportunity to do so by coming
down the aisle until. she was directly opposite
me. She blushed as l proffered her the seat
and without saying anything moved
in. / was obliged, therefore, to take
the inside or next the window. 1t
was very warm day and l was not sorry
that was located near the open window, as
the fresh air was quite invgoratng. She got
herself seated l was thinking of how 1
would open the conversation, when she
moved up very close to me and before l knew
it she had her lover on the other side of her
on the seat, while was squeezed up against
the side of the car. She never noticed me
after that. perspired and swore until we got
to the end of our journey
~
"a girl is very foolish to write to a man
until she knows him real WE'LL" remarked q
Louisville traveller. ''This applies to men on
the road as well as those in town or city It
is not reasonable to expect that al the men
on the road are gentleman, for it takes more
than one generation to make either lady or
gentleman; and it is likewise unfair to ac-
cuse all of us of lacking in gentility because
many travelling men are loud and disgusting.
Il was on q Short-line train between ST.
Paul and Minneapolis the other day. Directly
in front of me were two specimens of the
fashy travelling man, specimens that are too
often taken as the type of the whole fra
ternity. One of them was reading letter.
which, it is plain to see, came from some
foolish St. Paul girl who had met the recipient
and honored him with letter.
"'Here goes said he, addressing his seat
mate; '"My dear Mr. Brown, what will come of
our peculiar meeting, time alone will tell.''
She's lalla for looks and is clear gone on
me- Listen to her racket: II take you to be a
gentleman and believe that under all circum-
stances no one will learn harm from you
How's that for a chestnut? She's dandy
though, if she is mashed on me. She's q
beauty, and don't let it escape you for holy
minute. If she only had dust I'd blow myself
in right off. I guess I'll find how her
OLD man is rated in Duns, and if he's got
any spot cash, you can bet your life I'll lay
off and take her for keeps. Next time we're
in St. Paul I'll take you round and introduce
You.'
~
"a glass eye is grand Improvement, so
far as looks are concerned said mild
voiced man from Webster, N. H., ''but it is a
positive detriment to school teacher A
school teacher and glass eye should forever
remain strangers. l know what I'm talking
about, for I've got a glass optic, and / tried
to teach school with it in my left eye, but l
failed, and my failure was due entirely to that
darned old sightless makeshift for real eye
MY eye was put out while at Dartmouth
college. AS soon as possible after the acct
dent had a glass eye fitted and wore it for
the first time on commencement day, when
received my sheepSkin. AS soon as / grad
uated got district school near Keene and
began teaching the next fall. The school had
scholars, big and little, who were just begin
ming their A C's, and those who were I'M
shing or. Among the latter class were two
or three girls pretty well up i'll the teens.
one OF them was as pretty as picture.
knowing that the boys. needed more con-
slant watching than the girls, transferred
the former to the right side of the room and
gave the girls desks on the left SIDE This
change excited some comment as from time
1mmemorial the reverse order had been OBJ
served. could see that the change was not
popular measure, however, gave no rea-
sons for the move. Everything went along
without apparent friction or incicent until
the second Friday of my first month at that
time Ireceived note from the school direc-
ors, asking me to attend meeting of that
body on the following day.
II went to the meeting, expecting some
trouble On account of my changes in the
school room. The meeting had not fairly
opened before the senior director. with mucn
stanmerlng, informed me that the pretty
young girl, the Oldest in the school, calling
her by name, had informed the directors that
L never took my left eye of of her from the
beginning of school until it closed at recess.
noon and night. L explained that the accu-
sation was without foundation, taking the
glass shell from the socket, placed it OH the
table. They Immediately saw the injustice
of the accusation, but at the same time MAIN
81 : / ulo
effect on the girl pupils would be the same as
If it was real. In other words either had to
go without the eye or give up the school. l
did the latter and started out on the road
~
e. never swear said jolly, fat traveller
from Kansas City. ''And as we'll as | can re-
member never uttered but five or six oaths
in my life, and they were all pronounced
about the same time. Before and after that
/ never found it necessary to use a profane
word, and / believe l have as much temper as
any man, and have as macy things to annoy
and trouble me. It's all nonsense to hear
men talk about not being able to content
themselves in that particular. They can all
quit it if they only will. Every one OF them
Keeps from swearing while he is with women
and, if he can do it then, he can quit alto
gether.
''My swearing bee? Oh yes When was a
boy longed to swear as much as any boy,
but the teachings of my mother, who died
when was quite small, came to me and was
actually afraid to swear-afraid that some
thing, did not know what, would happen to
me. One evening 1 made up my mind to
swear the next day. On the following morn
ing, after breakfast, I went down under an
old culvert and began to swear like mate on
steamboat. had not got through all my
combinations, for / combined all sorts of
oaths, when the culvert caved in. 1 got out
in time to save myself from a horrible death.
with an oath on my lips. I took that cayiug-
in hIisiness q direct hint to me to Let LII,