davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-10-07
A "CLEANER-OUT" WANTED.
What He is Expected to Do at Ten-Cent
Restaurant.
From the Chicago Tribune ]

AAAD'aAAN'I
An advertisement appeared in a morn,
ing paper yesterday for the services of a
man to ''clean out restaurant nights"
The proprietor offered board in pay
ment for the services of the ''cleaner-
out, and, noting the direction, a re-
porter for the Tribune visited the eating
house, which is situated on the west
side, for the purpose of finding out the
exact nature of the services required
and the quantity and quality of the re-
muneration.
'No, sir" said the proprietor, 81
don't want a man to clean out the place
when its full of hard characters, for it
is out of them l make my money.
Neither do | want him to clean out the
provender when the days eating Is fin
ished. want him to come here at 10
p. m. and remain here until a. m,
sweep out, clean up the dirty dishes,
and straighten the house up generally.
1t is nearly an all-night job, but l can
get plenty of nice fellows to do it for
their three meals day"
The reporter noticed that 10 cents
was the highest price charged for a
meal, and he ventured to ask the price
of board by the week.
"Two dollars. sir, and I'll take all I
can get at that price. l can feed man
for 10 cents, give him the same quality
of meat and vegetables he would get at
tive-dOllar-a-week boarding house,
and make money. You notice adver-
tise any cut of meat, two kinds of vege-
tables, bread and butter, and cup of
coffee for @ cents | can make 4 cents
on every meal feed 400 per day, so
you see | make money"
"tave YOU had many applicants for
the position you want filled -
about 20, and a mixed lot they
were. Some were very genteel, smart
looking fellows, who would be glad to
do anything that would insure them
three 1O-cent meals per day. One fel-
low is an attendant at Rush Medical
College. He thought he would come at
first, but finally made up his mind that
the hours were little too long for him
and the distance too great to trav-
ell to meals Several rusty locking spec
linens called and spoke of having seen
better times. | didn't want them be-
cause | had my pick of some very re-
spectacle looking applicants, and be-
sides one of those hungry-looking fel-
lows would eat me out of house and
home while 1 would be sleeping.
The reporter declined an invitation to
dinner, and departed wondering if this
mans larder was like the widows bar
rel of oil, or if all boarding house keep
ers who charge So per week are robbing
the people.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-10-07
Obeying His Orders.
A LITTLE JOKE OF A FORMER sECRETA-
RY OF WAR.

Here is an anecdote which recalls an
episode occurring to one of Secretary
Endicott's predecessors of the War port
folio, Secretary Ramsey, of Minnesota.
During the incumbency of the latter
gentleman he INDUCED in trip down
the Potomac River one afternoon on
board Admiral Porter's splendid steam
yacht Falcon. Nearing Fort Washing
ton, some fifteen miles distant, Secre-
tary Ramsey expressed desire to in
spect the once famous fort, then, as
now, in dismantlement, and garrisoned
only by an Ordnance Sergeant. So the
yacht made landing at the pier. when
the United States Army, in the person
of the grizzled old Ordnance Sergeant,
hurried down and forbade the party
from debarking in terms more forcible
than polite, favored with an unmistak-
able MileS1an dialect.
Secretary Ramsey, who is fond of
joke, vainly expostulated against closing
approach to American citizens, but the
Limited States Army was obdurate
and said he was acting under orders of
the Secretary of War. After badgering
him awhile, to the intense amusem
of the company, Secretary Ramsey
said:
"Well, Sergeant, see you obey Or
ders strictly, and as you are acting un-
der authority of the Secretary of War,
only the Secretary can revoke or modify
the order.''
Exactly, gentlemen" sternly replied
the old martinez. $50 you might as
we'll be off and not be pestering me any
longer"
"Gentlemcn, ~ said Secretary Ramsey,
turning to his friends will you kindly
present me to The Sergeant?"
Sergeant" said admiral Porter,
War, your superior offieer!''
"Holy Mosesn n calculated the veter-
an, as he brought his hand to salute.
"And this is the Secretary, and why
didn't We let me know before ye was
coming? ! would have been ready to
receive ye for inspectionW
The pink of military propriety was in
sore distress He had not been entile-
ly polite, and felt himself derelict. He
was, however, put at his ease by the
Secretary, and the party ascended the hill
lilGO VIC lOlb, dIl'i NSLO HllO"L
the rapidly decayiig quarters and other
objects of interest and curiosity. The
Sergeant, however, got his revenge up
ON the Secretary. When they ap-
preached the magazine the Sergeant
halted the party and triumphantly
said:
"Mr Secretary, there is the maga-
zine, and with due respect, Sir, say
you can't go into the magazine; that is
against orders and Regulations. There
is just one place here over which you
have no authority, Sir, and l can't show
you the magazine"
''Never mind the magazine" ex-
claimed the Secretary. "You are en-
tirely correct, Sergeant" Turning to
his friends, the Secretary added en-
phatically: "Hang me, if the magazine
is not just the place where L don't want
to go and prefer to give a mighty wide
berth"
Sure, there's no powder in it, Mr.
Secretary, but you can't inspect it, just
the same" was the parting shot the
Sergeant fired at the Secretary as the
party withdrew.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-10-07
Advertising Rates.
TIE OLD SCHOOL BOOKS.

What pleasant memories cluster round those
volumes old and worn,
With covers smirched and bindings creased
and pages thumbed and tOrnl
These are the books we used to con, and
poor brother Will,
When we were boys together, in the school
house ON the hill
Well recall the nights at home, when side by
side we sat
Before the fire, and DER these books indulged
in whispered chat,
And how, when father chided us for idling
time away,
Our eyes bent to the task as though they'd
never been astray.
The old-time proverbs scribbIed here, the eau
tion to beware.
C'Steal no. this book my honest friend'')
seraWled roughly here and there,
The blurs, the bots, the luncheon spots, the
numberless dogs ears,
The faded names, the PICTURES, and, alasI the
stains Of tears,
All take me back in MUD TO days when cloud
less was the sky,
When grief was so short lived smilel before |
my tears were dry;
When, next to fathers angry frowD, feared !
the awful nod.
That doomed me, trembling, to advance and |
humbly kiss the rcd.
How bright those daysI Our little cares, our |
momentary fears,
And cen our pains, evanished with burst of
sobs and tears,
And every joy seemed great enough to bal
ance all our woe;
What pity that when griefs are real they can't
be balanced SOL
The school house stands in ruins now the boys
have scattered wide.
A few are old and gray like me, but nearly all
have died;
And brother Viii is one Of these; his curly head
was laid
Down by the brook, at fathers side, beneath
the willows shade.
These books so quaint and queer to you, to me
are living things;
Each tell story of the past, and each mes t
sage brings.
Whene'er 1 sit, at eventide, and turn their {
pages DER,
They seem to speak in tones that thrilled nv
heart in days of yore. I
The schoolboy of to-day would laugh and throw ,
these old books by; ,
But think you, neiShbor, could his heart con- s
sent if he were l?
R. w. MCALPNE. ,
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-10-07
PhOtOgraphing Conyicts at Alton.

A letter in the st. Louis Democrat
says 1t was your correspondents good
fortune to visit the prison on a recent
date, while the prison artist was en-
gagged in taking the pictures of 152 new
arrivals-convicts who had arrived dur
ing July and August-and of witnessing
the modus operandi of reproducing their
''mugs" on paper. Everything was in
readiness at $50 a. m. The artist hand
ed list of names to a guard and re-
quested him to bring in gang of thirty
or forty new convicts from the chair
shop. The officer soon had the raw re-
cruits in line and marched them across
the yard to the gallery, where they
were seated on a bench along the
wall in the outer room. Capt
Luke, the receiving officer, then took
the list of names, and entering the op
Grating room-where all was ready, the
camera in position-called out the name
of the first man on the list, and the
guard, picking out that man, hustled
HIM into the room.
''Sit right down here What's yer
name 2 What's yer register number 2
See that little red star on the wall z
Place yer eyes on that and don't move
till l tell yer-hold up that head lit
tie -
While this volleY was being fired into
the ears of the trembling convict, the
Captain grabbed the man by the shoul-
ders, squared him bac> IN the chair,
yanked his head around in the direction
of the star on the wall, chucked him
under the chin to elevate his head, and
then pulling around a wooden arm at
tached to the hcad-rest, and containing
a place in which to put some pasteboard
figures to represent the prison number
OF the convict, pushed it up against the
mans chest, so that the number would
show in the resulting picture. All these
manipulations were gone through with
In moments time, and then came the
ominous "click" of the instantaneous
shutter on the camera-the exposure
was completed. A second later and the
Captain yells:
'NeXt!n
And in comes another victim. They
follow each other in rapid succession,
like sheep coming to shearing.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-10-07
Curious Application of the Magnet.

A curious application of the magnet is
described in a French Journal the sub
ject being clock recently patented in
France. In appearance the clock con-
ssts of a tambourire, on the parchment
of which is painted a circle of flowers
CORES sponding to hour signs of ordinary
dials. On examination, two bees, one
large and the other small, are discovered
crawling among the flowers. The small
bee runs rapidly from one to the other,
completing the circle in an hour, while
the large one takes twelve hours to finish
the circuit. The parchment membrane
is unbroken, and the bees are simply laid
upon it; but two magnets connected
with the clock work inside the tam
BOURNE, move just under the membrane,
and the insects, which are of iron, fol-
low them
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-10-07
A ID, ad Hope.

The telegram read: 'Comc quickly;
baby is dying" and the night express is
bearing the father to his only child. A
cold hand seems clutching at his heart,
the heavy throbs of which are almost
sitting.
He remembers, now, the time when he
had tried to comfort dear friend who
had felt the loss of little one-how he
had wondered that he should SO grieve
at the call of Him who said "Sufier lit
tie children"
Yes, these little lights had before,
wavered, fiickered and gone out in
darkness, but now his own house is to
be left in shadow! No little hands to
scatter playthings; no little feet to patter
in echoing rooms!
Gazing out into the night, he catches
a CLEAN of light from farm house, and
he wonders, vaguely, if there, too,
baby is dying.
A mother sits opposite, and her sleep
ing babe has a strange fascination for
him. There is something almost pa
thetlc in her attitude, as bending over
it like a guardian angel, she passes her
hand lovingly over the smooth brow.
They are going home, he thinks; some.
where q husband and father is awaicing
them.
He, too, is going Monochrome, where
wife sits pale with watching, and a
babe lies dying! The little one that had
clung to his knees, lisped his name in
childish prattle, and bound herself to his
very heart-strings
He had thought so much of the time
when she should be ompanion to him.
and he should guide her along the way
which leads upward to glorious woman
hood, but now, his hopes, his prayers,
| his tears, are to end at-baby's grave
He scarcely heeds the time. The
shrek of the engine in the black night.
the hoarse cry of the brakeman, the
hustle and lights of the stations, are
meaningless to him. He is going home,
and-baby is dyingl
The train stops at last. Half daZed
he leaves it and gropes his way along
the dark streets The sound of his
footsteps is echoed mockIngly, and he
finds himself listening, half frightened,
at its ghostliness.
A light burns at the window, and as
he pauses at the gate door softly opens.
His wife meets him with a long drawn,
lSiIleSS SUI, anu ne hHOWS all.
She leads him into dim room where,
on white couch, lie the ashes of a dead
hope.
All. Daby-why couldn't you wait!
Very gently she strokes the bowed
head, and very softly she whispers:
at is best"
And here over the dead form, the
eyes, blue as the wild violet, curtained
forever, the baby hands folded, the
wee, tired feet resting, they stand re-
conciled, while over all, like incense,
float the odor of heliotropes and white
roses. M. QUAD.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-10-07

Squire looking at the bottle last night,
and there wasn't even crack in it."
The Old Settler went out behind the
barn to light his pipe that morning. He
was evidently ''het up"
''Six weeks longer, hay2" said he.
''Then I'll jist drop line to Sally Ann,
tellin' her th't the way feel now, she'd
better send for her young un to wunst,
for thuz danger O. his gittin' pizen in his
pancakes!"
When he walked over toward the
tavern, a little later, the Old Settler
looked as if he were on the search for
Eternal Vigilance, with the intention of
taking it by the neck, and no mistake
about it. ED Mort.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-10-07
SWINDLER.


| A Kingston On. " man writes to the
| Postmaster General: Il seen an adver
| tlsement from a man who offered to tell
me how to make a forchun If l would
send him twenty-five cents. | wanted
a forchun, so l sent him quarter, and
L got this slip of paper next day: How
| to make fortune: Work hard. Don't
drink. Don t marry. Be saving Now.
| Mr.. Postmaster General, don't YOU think
1t is shame to beat poor man out of
his mummy this way, and can't you stop
this swindling through the males. -
| Boston TruUeLter.
A GRAND SCENE.
'Tsn't it grand, Miss -2' said he.
''the rugged mountain burst in twain
by some mighty volcanic influence, and
nature covers the wound with towering
trees and MOSES of brilliant foliage.
Is it not grand, this canyon2''
She looked up for moment, and
said:
'Tt is high" And the poetic soul
shrank into its innermost recesses.-
San Francisco Chronicle.
BAD THE NEIGHBoRs DOWN FINE.
Grace had very curly hair, and it was
q great trial to her to have it combed.
Ore day she was crying and making a
greater disturbance than usual, when
her mother said:
'What will the neighbors say when
they hear you making such a noise ?''
Pausing amid her weeping she said,
in broken tones:
They'll say, why don't that woman
spank that child 2''-Phila. Call.
FISHING.
"Hello, Cephas going fishing in
fur cap this weather?''
'Cephas. Eyes, Marse Boss. NV ole
straw blowed overheard, an de ole
omen lowed jes ez we'll take dis one,
what wouldn't, an when l mentioned
de heatness Nv it, she say she reckon eff
'coons kin war fur all seasons, fisher
men an udder vermints kin. ."-Harper's
Bazar.
DOTS AND DAsHEs.
LOVE that begins in stable is liable
to be unstable.
WHERE are all the bad actors2 ''Read
the answer In the stars"
You might not guess it from its name
but Labor Day is holiday.
A CLIMBING plant with tendrils isn't
half so annoying as mosquito with
one
SINCE the quakes there are some per-
sons who don't want the earth so much
as they did.
WEALTH is an enemy to self-reliance
Az
canoe he wants somebody else to paddle
it for him.
a PHILADELPHIA beauty lately dazzled
Saratoga with 5000, 200 in gems. The
wife of pawnbroker has every advan-
tage in society.
IT was DR.. Holmes who said that only
gents wear ''pants," while gentle
men generally wear pantaloons. The
doctor might have added that men fire.
quently wear trousers.
SUNDAY school superintendent
children, tell me what heathens are
Small boy (who has been reading about
the Belfast riots is folks
what don't fight over religion.
FoGG has said the meanest thing any
man ever was capable Of saying When
Mrs +. left him alone in the house the
other evening she remarked: "You
won't be lonely, dear?'' NO." he re-
piled; 81 shan't miss you at all. The
parrot, you know, is here"
NEVER saw such forlorn looking
lot of presents. Clarissa the bride)-
But, mamma, there's some silverware
Nonsense, child! Every piece is
plated-not even triple plated. never
thought much of silver-service reform
before, but now think the sooner 1t is
brought about the better"
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-10-07
The J Judgment Day.

The Macon Telegram says:-In ne.
gro neighborhood on Tuesday while the
earth was rocking the cry was raised
that the judgment day was coming
An old nanny, with her kinky hair
almost straight from fear, rushed out
when she heard the announcement and
gazed upward eagerly. Suddenly she
shouted: "No hit amt honey; no hit
amt. De skies amt moved. When
Judgment Gums hits er cumin' bofe
ways" She was armed with the belief
that on that dread day the heavens and
the earth will rush together. 1t would
be well if every man could sus tain him
self with some simple belief CT philos-
ophy in panicky times.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-10-07

DIR. VALENTINE Mort, of New York,
read a paper on Rabbies," before the
New York Social Science Convention.
When bitten by a dog supposed to be
mad, to save, the wound should be
dashed with water to cleanse it and
treated with nitric acid, and eX-
cision of the bitten part with further
cauterization is wise. lie had visited
Pasteur, and strongly supported that
scientists theory of prevention through
inoculation,
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-10-07

The PLATFORMS. If the political
platforms yet to be made are likely to
be short for want of matter full plank
viewing with alarm" the progress of
earthquakes in this country might he
prepared The party that stands off the
earthquakes, the Louisville JommaL
thinks, will carry everything before it
in 'SS.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-10-07
Iron In Wnni

The curious question has been asked
why oaks and elms are especially liable
to be struck by lightning. 1t was de-
clared in 1887 that the elm, chestnut, oak
and pine were the most often struck in
America, and in 1860 G.. ]. Symonds
stated that the elm, oak, ash and poplar
were the most frequently struck in Eng
land. A Magdebulg record, covering
ten years, reports in Juries to 255 trees,
165 being oaks, "a Scotch frs, % pin, $
and 20 beeches. 1t has been suggested
that the frequency with which oaks are
struck is due to the presence of lion in
the wood.--NeO orleans Times Demo
cydt.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-10-07

IT'S pretty hard luck. In summer
we have horsefiies, and then again in
winter snow flies.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-10-07

Mrs. LuS Bainbridge, who recently
travelled through the Fast. says they do
not vaccinate women in Burmah because
they do not consider them worth the
trouble aud expeIse.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-10-07
THE J0KERS BUDGET.
A LITTLE HUMOROUS READING FOR
ONE TO SMILE OVER.
what wns seen-The Parsons Fee-Sound-
ing the GOng-He Knew the Neishbors-
Lost the Championship-H Changed His
Mind-DOts and Dashes Etc, Etc.
THE GONG SOUNDED.

The young man had taken her hand
and was pleading in impassioned tones
as they sat together on the sofa.
"lrene," said he, Though 1 am not
the possessor of great wealth, 1 can
offer you the devotion of heart that is
yours alone-a love that is as boundless
as the ocean and as enduring as the
everlasting hills The aim of my life
shall be to minister to your happiness
and to shield you from every stormy
blast. Your smile shall be my heaven
Oft in my fancy's wanderings-''
At this moment the silvery tone of a
little gong was heard. The young man
paused, turned pale, and said In an
agonized voice:
''Oh, Irene! At such moment as
this, when my life's happiness is trem-
bling in the balance. can you be so cruel
and heartless as to pull a chestnut gong
on me. &c Chicago Tribune.
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1886-05-12
A Fine Piece of Casting.

The D. w. Flowerree Ice Company have
one of the finest engines III the Southern
country, but by some mistaken idea OF
science In the construction OF Its cylinder
aud steam chest which weighs 1000
ponndsl ,hey were cast in one piece, aud
by contraction and expansion was caas-
ed to crack in such a manner as to render
a new one necessary. Col. Fiowerree called
upon Messrs. A. NJ. Paxton < Co. 10 know
if they could supply duplicate OF this
huge piece of casting, which they promptly
undertook. made patterns for and east =
cylinder weighing ] 200 pounds, which
bored out measured inside IA inchss IN di-
au,eter and S0inehes in length, and steam
chest measuring 3oxlS inches over all, and
ui,,e inches deep, which, with the valve
weighed 4 00o pounds. Il was placed In
position lew days since and works like
charm, not only being an improvement on
the old cylinder. ia being in Two pieces, bat
i far superior in every particular TO the
original piece Of casting. and il is with an
excusable degreesof pride thai we note our
ability to do such work in vieksburg
Messrs. Paxton & Co. inform US that they
are prepared TO do any kind OF casting o.
tbis character. Nicksburg Commercial
Herald, May >, 1856
The clarion. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1883-1888, 1886-05-12
The Very Best-The Very Biggest of
All the Big Unes-There Must be a
Leader, and He is John Robinson.

The oldest Snowman OF them all. His
fiity-ninth year before the people. Sev-
enty-seven wears OF age. He comes out
ten times greater. fen times more ma
iestlc. and ten times finer than any other
show the sun shines on. By reason OF his
recent purchase in Europe of ten of the
largest shows in the world There are in
the neighborhood of twenty cireuses In
America, and about ten in Europe, tfor
since John Robinson purchased ten OF the
larges, in that country it has reduced the
nur,be over one-half) and one or two
others in various parts OF the world. OF
these. the largest and best known is the
John Robinson Show, which exhibits In
Jackson, Tuesday. May %. 1t was first
started in the year OF our Lord one thou
sand eight hundred and twenty-four, fifty
niue wears ago. The first combined circus
and menagerIe the world ever knew or
heard of. And it has always been under
the control of John Robinson from that
far distant day until the present time,
and to-day it represents more invested
capital. employs more artists, agents and
laborers aud performers; has more wild
beasts, larger tents, more seating capacity,
and is altogether and in every respect
three times As large as any other combined
exhibition on earth Don't forget the
dar