davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1886-01-24

PRINT ana distribute ~, OOU copies. W mat 90
you say?"
Rats"
What"
Excuse me, said rats-s-t-a-r spelled
backwards. Do you understand? No, l
must decline To- advertise in your pamphlet;
haven't time to talk 10 you; don't want to
either. And I'm busy. Good morning.
If you really think this idea which you say
struck you at Chicago is new, you're mis-
taken. You must have been long time
getting here, for about 10000
ADVERTISING FIENDs
have been here before you and the racket
has been worked to death. Excuse me, my
friend, if l remark that this is my busy
day." and with this 'leading business
man." as he had just been called. almost
pushed his caller out of the office. Then
his countenance took on look that was
almost beatific, and lighting cigar, he
sOlilOQuiZed: Curious, amt it?
mean how these fellows hang on TO
a thing that has once been success
fully worked. | don't believe they will
ever let up. Half dozen of 'em here every
week. l didn't know how to get rid of
them for a long time, but I've found out
This was an easy one. When L came here
six years ago, it was a new thing to
me, and | must have been what they call
dead soft l had always attributed my
success i'll a measure TO advertising, and
used 10 go up against almost any scheme.
But don't do it nOw-Fd use up my entire
profits if L did. draw the line at the
newspapers. Once in while. perhaps, L
take a little space in some program for a
church tair as a matter OF charity rather
than business, or go into something that
strikes me as really novel, but this
putting your card on hotel registers, or
business directories. or to be stuck up
around in a thousand and one pieces is
played out. just imagine this fellows
nerve though, in coming in here with a
new idea that was originated when Father
Hennepin was youth. Stupenuous price
of enterprise. amt 1t, to publish cuts of Min
nehaha and the stOne-arch bridge! Did you
ever hear of such gall?
.'How do l get rid of 'em? Well, you
saw how treated that one just now.
used the term rats because l saw it would
convey a world of meaning to him. Blessed
be the man who first discovered rats 1t
implies doubt. contempt impotence and
dislike in one word. The moment he heard
that ne knew perfectly well that it would
be wasting his more or less valuable time
for him to remain longer. Another effective
method that have invented is what term
the chilling act This L use when the
tiend takes on the shape of an elderly man
of respectable appearance. l hardly notice
him, keep on writing, turn by back when
he is making an extraordinary effort to in
terest me. He tries to perseyere, but /
lust literally freeze him, and he thinks
he'll go out on the street where its warmer.
Then there's the regular fakir. / never
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1886-01-24
QUITE CONCLUSIVE.

"What's that you say, You never f1irt?
Have you forgotten Mt. Desert
Last SummerP-
''Why-y-y
You wouldn't call that flirting,
We had often met before,
And though others found her charming,
i thought she was bore"
mot such bore, but sometimes
You would take long walks alone,
But you forget that Boston 'culchaw
Never needs a chaperone.
ssYet when she went to climb the rocks
You'd always go''-"ro catch the breeze,
And sketch the views in Chinese white
She gave me hers in japanese.
s.You told me you adored blue eyes
And hers were blue, but yours ar&
bluer,'-
.sDon't compliment, il makes me tired, -
land far the sweetest 1 am sure
Times Democrat.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1886-01-24
WHY THE HYMN WAS CHANGED
Too Old for a Rosebud and Too
Young for a Century Plant.

An old gentleman of s. years
had just died and the choir was rehearsing
little music for the funeral. They were
going through hymn in which occurred
the phrase "a rosebud dying in its bloom"
when the young soprano stopped, and in a
very distressed voice remarked:
''Oh! that will never do, you know. 1t is
so ridiculous to sing rosebud" when he
was nearly 80 years old. We really
must change that"
why, of course, said the tenor. ''How
does century plant strike you?" The so
pranO shifted out that light quickly.
"WOuld chestnut do?" suggested the or
ganist. This was also unsatisfactory and
the hymn was changed.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1886-01-24
How New Workers Get at il.

New York Star.
Overheard in an elevated train.
He was making up to very plain girl.
He-Charley thinks you mighty pretty.
She-Shut up!!l
He-He said so, anyhow.
She-Shut upl
He-I think so, too.
. She (softly)-Hus-s-sh
They got off at Grand street in q HOS.
loving way.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1886-01-24

allow him TO
com m e u ce. L
just simply say,
L unerstand all
about your little
schem c. and
don't do any adj
vertising except
in newspapers
It's worse than
useless to try to
argue with him.
Chapaae ara hp
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1886-01-24

is an old hand. and knows from actual eX-
perlence just how TO meet any objection you
can bring forward. If you attempt to guy
him he will become impudent and you'll get
the worst of the controversy. / once put
of one of this kind who had been to see me
several times with. next time you come in
I'll give you an adj He started off. and
when he got to the sidewalk turned around
and came back. Good morning. he said,
Just as if he hadn't seen me for
a month. When 1 was here last
the next time called. Let me remind you
miTe the fellows cheek and ingenuity, and
gave down that time, but it was the last.
The Buffer is a young man, rather
fiashily dressed. usually little out OF
season. He assumes that you have already
consented to patronize his particular fake.
and pretends to be Indifferent as to whether
YOU have decided to remain with him or
not. Finally he'll say how much space do
YOU suppose you'll want?. When
you mildly protest that You don't
want any at all. he becomes sur
prised, and then
aggres siye,
shakes his finger
in your face and ZSN
tells you he ZS~7
don't cares II ~
whether you do - Z/A
or not; hi "
scheme is one w II
that people will ~ Il
only be glad to " ~ ~
go into; he came ~
TO you because -EE/
he wanted to
have only leading houses represented; he's
astonished to think that a man like you,
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1886-01-24

who has been successful because Of Judi.
cious advertising, should go back on tile
people who made him; If the business men
of Minneapolis are going to act that way
he'll 20 over to st. Paul, etc, etc. All the
time he is making this bluff he is arguing
with considerable shrewdness, and is liktIy
to catch good many advertisers in this
way. These fakirs loom up a few weeks
in advance Of some big public event. Dur
lnS the e.. A. r. eneampment they came
here in drOves, with all sorts OF programs,
guides and pamphlets descriptive of the
city. Last fall twelve men called here in
one day with ''offieial programs" for tho
state fair. When the exposition starts
they'll show up again.
Another kind Of a fakir is the timOrous
youth, who seems to hardly dare say hia
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1886-01-24

my time. Can't give you a page? I'll
assure you that we will not take any one
else in your line. I'll make the rate to you
al $50 and give you a guarantees that we'll
print and distribute 90. 900 copies. What do
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1886-01-24

have only leading houses represented; he's
astonished to think that a man like you,
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1886-01-24

soul is his own.
He can hardly
stammer out a little
speech that he has
evidently commit
ted to memory.
YOu look him over
and see that his
clothes are shabby
and that he has ali
the symptoms of
being hard-up. You
imagine that he's
EAru.a. .-....
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1886-01-24

some green young fellow who is trying to
exc out an honest livlihOod and unless you
nave become ealloused you will pity him.
In any event you can't treat him harShly.
He is so
INOFFENSIyE AND SHRINKING
ana looks as though he might faint away IL
spoken to unkindly. This sort always has
some utterly worthless scheme that YOU
can bring yourself to regard favorablv."
here Is another specimen-he doesn't
unOutton his ulster or take his cigar out of
his mouth, but mods at you and says good
morning. and then goes to the register "a
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1886-01-24

''Well," said the skipper to himself, ''ef
this don't beat ,possum trackin', bust me ef
/ know what does, an that's a fact.
They're a cunnin' lot OF rascals, they are!
JeS' think that they should come it over
poor innocent little kid like that thar. an
then try an blarney me with lot of yarns
bout spirits, We're ten days ont, any
way, an Wen make Liverpool tO-mOrrer,
so that 1t doesn't signify with much. an
Thomas hundred pound III pay; but it's
real mean. that's what 1t IS"
Williams, vino. with all his roughness,
was a kind-hearted man. could not bring
himself TO tell Mary Jane what he had seen.
but he became concerned with a new
thought What was to be done with her on
| landing? She lived in Birkenhead, she said.
but how was he to find out i'm huge place
| like Birkenhead. where she lived and who
her parents were? Take her to his own
home he dare not, partly because Mrs.
Williams had FIVE youngsters of her own,
and partly because she was a bit Of Tartar
and would be sure to be down pretty
heavily on him for taking so much notice of
a strange. st0w-away child when he was
always complaining about the expense and
worry of his own.
So this question as to the disposition OF
Mary Jane JohnswOrth vexed Capt. Will
ing, when Holyhead Light was sighted. and
his attention was directed TO other matters.
Little Mary Jane was in state OF great ex-
element at the approach to her native land,
now running 10 one side of the deck. now
TO the other, then scuttllng up the cOmpan-
ion ladder 10 the bridge, then darling into
the galley to poster Marcus with all sorts Of
questions. 10 which the faithful negro had
to invent answers, then dashing away into
the foc'sle, until it was dark and she could
see no more.
At midnight the Clairmont, Capt. Will
Jams, was safe alongside the dock quay. and
the captain himself, after bothering day,
was at liberty 10 turn liz.
Poor little kidF' he said. as he caressed
Mary James fair hair, land what's to be-
come of you? I'm real sorry that the voy-
age is finished. as I've got uncommon fond
o. you. Mary Jane. an eff hadn't kids of
my own, I'd like 10 change your name to
Mary Jane Williams, and turn you out .
real lady,"
SIS your home here?" asked the child.
looking up in the captains face, with an
artless gaze.
Yes, my sugar stick" replied the cap
| tain. number Il, Providence Road
that's where the misses is located. but she's
agoin' back to New York. she is, next trip.
But look yer, reckon you're a bit tired;
you 60 and turn in and tomorrow well see
what's to be done"
| So he kissed the child as he babe her
, 1886-10-28
A CONVOY AND WIRE FENCE.
4 Young Man Dangerously Injured
While Racing.

John Reynolds, a cowboy who has lust
come in from Fetterman, is authority for
the following account of an accident
which happened to one OF his comrades
last week.
The outfit was on a beef round up.
Ed. Randall, the night herder, had a bay
horse which he had always boasted could
beat anything in the cou TRY. His claim
was not disputed until a few weeks ago,
when a Mexican, who had been engaged
at Fetterman a few days before, boosted
OF having a horse that could beat his
without any trouble, SO a race was soon
ma lie and the contestants were to run a
mile for SIS. The race took place in a
lane about fifty yards wide. At the end
of the mile stretch the lane turned
sharply to the right, so that it was with
difficulty that the Mexican, who came out
first, succeeded in turning the corner and
escaping being cut by the barb wire fence.
but Randall did not fare so luckily.
Being unable to turn quick enough, the
horse ran square into the fence. Both it
and the rider fell soon after, and as
neither one moved, they we're thought at
first to be killed. Randall, however,
soon regained consciousness. His injuries
were numerous and painful. his right leg
being broken above the knee. his shoulder
dislocated, and one of the wires cutting a
rough cash through the calf of his left
leg to the bone. His face and body were
also badly lacerated by the harbs. The
horses throat had been cut as with a
knife, and lie died almost instantly.
Randall Is at present in a very critical
condition, although he may probably
recover. He caught cold soon after the
accident in the different bruises on his
body, which has placed him in a very bad
fly
, 1886-10-28

The local land Office has recently been
notified by the commissioner to suspend
all entries and all further disposal of
lands lying in the sections which, from
the official plots, appear to be intersected
BIZ the lines of the Fort Fctterman hay
reservation. These lines lie, according to
the survey, within the accepted boundar-
les OF townships 81 and 81. in ranges 10,
10 and -. The register an | receiver are
also notified to suspend disposal of all
lands in sections 30 and 80, of township
81, in range -. This order has been
made because a correctional survey of the
boundaries of the reservation is soon to
be made, after which the suspension will
doubtless be countermanded, as the char
acter of the land involved will then be
more exactly known. 1t is said that this
alleged reservation contains some of the
richest coal deposits in the territory
lying on Deer creek-and the department
is rieht in attempting to have the exact
character of the lands determined, in
order that, when the reservation is open
to settlement, they may be subject to
entry under whatever law may best apply
to their real character.
, 1886-10-28

CHICAGO, Oct. 27.-The proposition to
substitute In the order Tor the evening
services the prayer for civil authority in
place OF the existing prayer for the presi
dent of the United States, excited much
debate. The prayer As reported from the
committee ana as sent down by the house
of bishops made no mention of the chief
executive by his office, but instead con-
tanned the following.
so rule the hearts of all those whom
Thou hast set in authority over rs, that
they, etc.
The house finally rejected the form pro
posed by the house Of bishops and adopted
the prayer contained in the book OF mott
t%ication. This prayer, which if agreed to
10y the house of bishops, at once becomes
the property of the church and part OF It's
revised prayer book. reads as follows;
so rule the hearts of Thy servants,
the president of the United States, the
governor OF this state, and al others in
authority, that they, etc.
1t Is noted that the printing OF tho
phrase-the governor OF the state -
in italics notice IL conveyed that It's use l.
%permissivc, since there may arise case
when the use of this phrase would not be
applicable.
A message from the house oil bishop
was received during the evening session
non concurring with the resolution of th'
deputies on the canon concerning mar
riapc and divorce The message recon-
mends that the matter be passed over L
the next convention a unfinished busl
ness. The work of rcvisinl ,hc nriyo
book continued until a late hour
, 1886-10-28
WIND-WINGED
Items Blown About by the Fall
Breezes
And Gathered Into The Reporters
Note B ok.

Fairs are plenty this week.
The different candidates help out the
| fairs wonderfully.
The nex Episcopal church Is fast APP
preaching completion.
The receipts Of the Catholic fair
amounted to over 500.
There seems to be much argument in
town in regard to the faith or mind cure.
Last night was the closing one Of the
Catholic fair, which has resulted very sue
c~essfully
The Congregational church ladies will
have a supper and fancy table Thursday
and Friday.
The new lumber yard Of X. Il. %llorrie
is nearing ccmrleticn, and is beil,g rap
idly stocked.
''Hallow Fen next Sunday night.
There will be plenty of time to celebrate
after church is over.
The horse hitched to Hallam's express
wagon took a spin around the depot yes
teriay without 2 driver. No damage was
done.
Several OF our citizens lett yesterday
for Denver for the purpose of attending
the meeting Of the Congregational Asso-
citation.
\ three-story stone building IS 10 be
erected in the near future upon the vacant
lot on the corner Of Fifteenth and Hill
streets, and will certainly add much to the
appearance of that block.
Noah p. Plant was married Yesterday
morning to Miss Mary Mckay, of this
city, Father Smith oliciaeing. Both bride
and groom have many friends in this city
who wish them a happy life. They took
the train for the coast yesterday.
Special Agent George, who has Just
returnea1 from an official tour, reports the
most nSrthward grading camp Of the
Cheyenne & Northern as located, on Mon.
day last. on the south bank of the Lara
mic river Work is progressing rapidly
and with every prospect of completion at
IN earlier day than people generally ex-
poet.
, 1886-10-28
Personal
Items Of Interest Concerning Prominent
People.

II, Marsh Is in the city.
n. c. Hart il up from Fort Collins.
Harry Kuykcndall has returned to this
city.
Phillip Daicr is much improved in
health.
Rev. G. NJ. Sanders left tor Denver
Yesterday,
l.. Kabis and wife returned from the
east yesterday.
Mayor A. II. Reel came in yesterday
from his ranch.
Russell Thorpe left for Rawhide yes
terday morning.
George B. Henderson came up from
Denver last evening.
y. N. Craig arrived Yesterday morning
from an extended trip through the west.
j. T.. Rugg departed for Lusk yester.
day. His family will remain in this city.
Col. Luke Murrin and Jas. Talbot
ttuIHt last tNtu4hE 4ltlu Il tlln up
north.
Judge +. Bergman and Willis Van
Deyanter came in from the north last
evening.
Miss S. Schneider and Mrs. j. Braun
left on yesterday mornings tram for
Denver.
Mrs. j. G Baird. accompanied by her
sister, Miss Nettic Garrow, went visiting
to Colorado yesterday.
Pacific hotel: w. b. Todhunter,
Sacramento; VIM. H. King. Mrs. Snill
and Mrs. Davis, Salt Lake City; A. D.
Garrison. San Francisco; W. II. Smith,
St. Louis. and David Bell, Louisville.
Inter Ocean: Paul j. Wi landy. st.
Louis; j. L. Butler, Salt Lake; c.. W.
Wilson and S. Alsop, Denver; l.. c,
Wilson, Portsmouth. o Geo. b. Hen
derson, Denver; Geo. A. Keeline, Coun-
ell Bluffs and j. U. Johnston, St Lonis.
, 1886-10-28
TERRITORIAL TOPICS.


Lander needs a Touring mill.
The organization OF a fire company is
contemplated at Douglas.
The Adrertiser thinks DoullaS needs an
opera house and a brass band.
Each Of the two banks of Douglas are
doing an average daily cash business OF
$40, 900, besides a vast amount OF other
important transactions.
We are informed by a gentleman lust
down from Miners Delight, that Mrs.
James Kline raised a fine garden this sea-
son. Potatoes weighing two and three
pounds. onions OF large size. and radishes
Of finest quality. besides lettuce, cabbage
and %cucuDber- in large quantities. Who
now dares to say Wyoming is not an agri-
cultural country2-LuBder MoWpta6,ec'.
Tom lots are being sold at Saratoga
and other southern and northern points,
and we can say o without fear of CON
tradiction. that Rawlins is indeed the
Future Great. One word will express
II situation fully to everyone, and that
is BOOM for the actions of thecompany
show that they now intend to do all in
their power to materially aid Rawlins,
making this city their headquarters tor
the main hne in the territory and for two
prosperous branches. placing us in direct
communication with the ontside world on
a more favorable footing than the most
hopeful had ever dared to expect. -Rdr-
Inns Tribune.
The oil fields, of which 50 much has
been written, are the real objective point
probably, of all these roads. Mcssrs. II.
q. King and Cy lba recently returned
, 1886-10-28

Manufactured only by the California
Fig Syrup company, San Francisco, Cal,
is nature's true laxative. This pleas
ant California liquid fruit remedy may be
had of w. N. Hunt. Large bottles at
50 cents or one dollar. 1t is the most
pleasant, prompt and effective remedy
known to cleanse the system; to act on
the liver, kidneys and bowels gently yet
thoroughly; to dispel headaches. colds and
%tcvcrs; to cure constipation, indigestion
and kindred ills.
, 1886-10-28

All travellers stopping for a time in
Cheyenne can find the best accommoda-
tons in the ,ity at the Western Hotel on
Fifteenth street. The location is agreea-
Bile and convenient, rooms pleasant and
newly furnished. meals the best a first
class cook can prepare from the finest
materials in the market. walters who IN
derstand their business. the best liquors
and cigars in the bar room are among the
many attractions Of this popular house
HERMAN KIMME. proprietor.
, 1886-10-28
Catholic University Board.

BALTIMORE, Oct. PA meeting OF
the Catholic university board was held
to-day at the cardinals palace. There
were present Cardinal Gibbons, Arch
bishops Williams, Ryan and Corrigan.
Bishops Spalding, keane, ireland and
Martin; Monsignor Farley, Rev. Drs.
Foley and Chappell and Messrs. T.. Wag-
raman, and Michael jenkins. Plans for
the university were discussed fully and
minor details are arranged. A letter was
prepared and addressed to the pope,
asking his holiness to bless and approve
the institution, and submitting details Of
the studies, discipline, organization, etc.
also one to the cardinal project of the
propaganda, which was of similar tenor.
These were entrusted to the Right Rev.
Bishops keane. of Richmond, and Ire
land, of st. Paul. who will carry them to
Rome, sailing from New York next Sat
urddy. 1t was stated at the conference
that 500. 900 had been subscribed in adj
dition to Miss Caliwcll's original contri-
button of $500, 900
, 1886-10-28
THE LAST NIGHT.
The Catholic Fair Over--A Great


The last evening of the Catholic iar
was the most profitable and the most
successful of the three nights. Quite Il
number of candidates, who dropped in
to see what was going on helped very
much towards making the entertainment
a financial success. The supper was gen.
e%rously patronized, as also were the other
departments. Voting for the most pop
ular young lady seemed to be the chief
event of the evening. At every turn was
to be met a young lady wanting you to
take a chance in a rattle. The articles to
be ratified are too numerous to mention,
the most prominent being an easy chair
and a smoking set. Dancing commenced
at 10 O'Clock and was kept up until a late
hour. Much credit is due to Mr..
Winters and the several ladies for the
able manner in which they managed the
affair.
, 1886-10-28

CHICAGO, Oct. Pin the Lutheran
conference this afternoon Rev. 7. A.
kunkleman, OF Grandville, Pa, on be
half Of the committee, submitted a tinan
cial plan for mission work The feature
of the report was a provision that all
synods be requested to transfer their en-
tire home mission work within, as well as
without their bonds, to n committee OF
the general council. After the transfer a
secretary of the home mission is to be APP
pointed The plan was not discussed.
owing to the lack of time, but was com
mended to the district synods for consid
Grafton during the coming year. Doctors
Passa and Spaeth and Mr.. w. H. Haak
we've appointed a board of directors for
the proposed Lutheran seminary in Chi
cago. After the appointment of stand
ing committees the council adjourned sim
die.
The council will meet next year on the
second Thursday in September at Green
vile. Pa.