Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-04-07
BRIGHT BITS.

WIEN the scales f-l from a mans ewes he
ought TO be able 10 see ng weigh.-Puck.
The GOBLET out of which the Duke Of Mari
horI ugh drank the night before the nat lie OF
haiplaquet was preserved, and has Just been
sold IN Paris. Evidently the owners of he
HerJld.
THE SERVANTS: The MARQUIS engaging
Y letl-"Haw-I no e you lie your cigars
tuI-navored, for my last man, who WAS < od
enough TO admit suited him, AID nine were
bea7iiy and made him sick, ana 30 took him
sell Oh."-Lo0a0B PWDch.
On SAN JONES GIVING Up TOBACCo.-
60 tell the chaWey u news abroad,
l. teverybody bltb it,,
AMI pray that Jone- may not resume
TINS most niche wrious habit
~ Washington Critic.
81 UNDERSTAND Anna Dick nson IS about to
wri new play. wonder whether it will
be ~uccrssful?"
rs she going TO act in it,"
Then wouldn't be surprised If it should
have quite run.'-Ns0 York Graphic.
PARLoR CONVERSATION: Mon Dieu,
what boor this man u Is."
NOT always. He is very gentlemanly when
he wants to be-"
Possibly; but unfortun tely he always
makes an ass of himself when he does not
want to!'-FreDcA W.T..
BONNET THOUGHTS
hnee'ln in cushioned pew
Beauty shades her e. Of blue.
Is her soul on n Yer intent?
Is her thought alone Of Lent9
Is she truly penlten5
A. she reals from out her book?
The admontion, watch and pray"
No; her ihOugh. l. peWs away.
Aud + mind is filled with care
For she wonders how her hair
Fixed NJ like the smith girls there
Would really, truly look.
-Eschqnge.
CIRCUMSTANCES ALTER CAsEs-"GeptIe-
men," said college President at a meeting
Of the faculty, I'VE must take means at once
o stop the game Of foot ball. II is bring pg
our grand old institution into disrepute."
just hen a great nose was heard on side
and The President demanded the cause of it,
News has just been received" explained
one OF the young professors, ap'lOgetically,
''th t our men have wresLed the football
championship from Prin cetOn."
"GOOdn' shouted the President, flushed
with ex lite "eut; Il diin't dare hope it. |
thiuS, gentlemen, we had better not be to-er
too hasty in this matter."-L0e.
How COULD He TELL?-Yesterday a gen
Item IN, re~lding IN neat, modest cottage in
tue suburbs Of Austin, caught tramp
prOwling about his back ard. evidently try
ing to steal something. "Whv don't Won
come 10 the front door if you want any
IN ngf" indi2n ntly roared the proprietor,
"Fnsrs what was looking for" was the
impudent reply.
Ditn't YOU see / on the other side of the
house" retJrted the gentleman.
How was 10 knO that was the front
door? No silver door plate, no bell, no tele-
phone, no statuarv, no servant to taNe your
p at and cane. Tell your hn-s there is a gen
tleman out here who is waiting for his break
,ast." When The gentleman got back with
his shot gun the tramp was not there any
m re.-Ieu - Sifsfags.
THE WAR VETERAN
Soon the tramp VIII be a. gong
OCT of town.
Soon at farm gates he'll be blowing
OF reuOwn,
Won on many a field of battle
In the past.
Where the bullet Ill old rattle,
Thick and fast.
Don't believe the wretched sinner.
He's be {,
Ne'r IN fight was ne winner,
He's cheat.
ke'r a battle did he fight in,
But with makes;
Send him down the road a-kan',
With the shakes
-Bost'n B,td0et.