davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18
ONLY VICE-PRESIDENT.

An Account of a Panic Which Struck Re-
pubicans at Mention of the "Bla elk
Eagle" for President.
The campaign of 1888 is still so re-
mote that there ought not to be much
training for the race of that year. A
great many things may happen in two
years, and when the two years have
passed and the time for nominations
has arrived a great many things may
not happen.
In spite of all this, however, the re-
cent banquet of the Logan Invincibles
of Baltimore came very nearly
breaking up in row because the
men present were not of one mind.
Being Logan club, Logan was quite
naturally the theme, and every speaker
had sounded his praises until a certain
man from Maine, named Boutelle, took
the floor and made an urgent appeal
for the old ticket. He loved Logan
and so did every body else, but he
wanted him for Vice-President and the
man with the waving plumes for Presi-
dent. After that break several others
intimated that Blaine and Logan would
suit them pretty well, and the as
semblage would have degenerated into
a pow-wow for the old ticket had not
some stanch friend of the great Illi-
noisan recalled the brethren to the fact
that it was on his swarthy brow that
the light of the morning was breaking.
TWAS to be supposed that General
Logan in his aspirations for the lead in
1888 would be embarrassed to some eN-
tent by the fact of his candidacy in
1884, but such demonstration as this
was hardly looked for in an organiza-
ton bearing his own name. Mr.. Hen
bricks could always command Vice
Presidential nomination, and yet the
moment he pushed for the lead there
was howl for the old ticket. If the
Logan Invincibles are thus stampeded
in the green tree what may be eX-
pected of them in the Chicago
Herald.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18
a STuPENDouS BRlBE.
The Blair Educational Bill q venal Offer
for the Democratic Birthright.

The Blair Educational Bill q Venal Offer
for the Democratic Birthright.
Of the political questions before the
present Congress there is none worthy
to compare in importance-nones so far
reaching in its possible political conse-
quences as what is known as the "Blair
Educational BILL" 1t does not require
many words to state the purpose of the
measure. 1t is an act to split the solid
South. What the Republican party
failed to do with the bayonet under
Grant, it hopes to do with brides under
Cleveland. To the Democrats of the
South it offers the lion share in seven
ty millions of the peoples money to be
taken with their aid from the public
treasury, while it seemingly imposes no
conditions upon its acceptance other
than that of their cooperation in re-
moving the constitutional barriers
which protect the treasury.
But the involved conditions in this
most insiduous proposition are inexor-
able. If Southern Democrats accept
the bride, it can only be at the sacrifice
of every principle on which Democracy
rests. They must deny their capacity
for individual self-government; reject
the doctrine of strict constitutional con-
struction and the Democratic axiom
that the general Government has no
powers except such as are expressly
granted to it; it must repudiate the
constitutional amendment declaratory
of reserved rights in the States and the
people and make an unqualified sub
mission to the Republican proposition
that while the general-welfare clause
remains in the constitution, no act
which majority of Congress judges to
be for the general welfare can be I'M
constitutional. 1t must put the control
of its schools and the education of its
children in the hands of the general
Government. and join with the Repub-
lican party in hurrying forward to the
time when centralized, paternal Gov
eminent will look after the welfare of
people too weak and unmanly either
to care for or govern themselves. 1t
must change the Democracy of Thomas
Jefferson for the Federalism of Alex
ander Hamilton and the Republicanism
of the Grants, Blaines and John Sher-
mans.
The bride can not be taken without
complete reputation of Democratic
principles. The initial effects of the
measure may be seen already. In Mis-
sissippi, Texas. Tennessee and other
states, factions which have since the
war adhered to the Democratic party
are finding in this bill an issue upon
which to divide The South is poor.
1t needs money. 1t was drained by a
long war, from which it has never re-
covered. The Federal Government
made citizens of its slaves and should
educate them for citizens. These are
their arguments, but the real argument
is the seventy-million shining dollars
the mess of pottage the Republican
party offers them for their Democratic
birthright.-iSt Louis Repub{ican
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18
A SAFE BUSINESS,
How One Citizen of Dakota Manages to
Grow Wealthy.

How One Citizen of Dakota Manages to
Grow Wealthy.
'The trouble I find in doing business
here said man to stranger on a Da-
kota train, sis that expenses are SO heavy
paying out money all the time"
Il don't find it that way" replied the
other. 'Now in my business never pay out
any thing"
well, that's pretty good, what is your
business?'
I'm running Territorial hail insurance
company"
II should think it would take money to
meet losses"
II don't find it necessary"
GLOW do you arrange it?"
''If farmer reports a loss l ask him
what else he could expect with his crop
scattered all over the farm. Then 1 show
him clause in the policy that he hadn't
seen before in which he is instructed to take
his crop in every night and put it under the
bed where it will be safe.'
"But you don't talk that way when you
are insuring them?"
ooh, no; my agents tell them that if they
see cloud coming up they may go right
down town and draw on the company for
the full amount" -EsteHine ID. IT, Bell
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18
AN OLD COON.

A Colored Gentleman Corrects Mistaken
Young Man.
az desiah to explain a tragedy, sah,'
said very Intelligent oking colored man
to Captain Starkweather at the police
headquarters recently.
"What is it?"
'About an hour ago, sab, was pro-
ceeding along Hastings street. A young
man who was drivin' a delivery wagin
looked at me wild a very open countenance
and remarked dat dere was new coon in
town. De refieckshun was intended to re-
fleet on me, sah." .
''No doubt of it,"
s.De young man was entirely mistaken,
sab. lie ibid in Detroit twelve years.
Oars muffin new bout me, sah-not chen
any new chliblains."
But what about the tragedy"
'sWell, sab, we collided. [ specks
colided little mo- wild him dan he did
wild me. He cum down off dat wagin, an
he rolled around in de snow, an when
got frew wild him he bore de appearance OF
a blasted rose"
''And what do you want done?"
muffin, sab, 'cept if I'm wanted fur dis
tragedy l want you to know whar' you kin
find me. just send an officer to Mrs.
Smiths, on Hasting street, and hev him
inquar' fur Prof. Babcock Sharp, de
gem'lan who initiates a mocking-bird to
perfeckshun, an who am an old coon in
own."-Detroit Free Press.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18

tracted many, and scores ''who came to
scott. remained to pray"
From that hour his life has beer changed.
Wherever the way has opened, he has been
preaching, telling others what the Gospel
has done for him. Rev. Sam Jones and
Mr.. Small have held meetings in various
parts of the South, and their work has
been signally successful. 1t is estimated
that the lives of from thirty-fve to forty
thousand persons have thus far been al
fected by their efforts and meetings. Their
work is evangeistic and undenomination-
al, and their avowed object is to seek the
conversion of all and to induce them to
live righteously, soberly and godly in this
present life, SO as to be prepared for the
life to come.
In personal appearance Mr.. Small is tall
and slim. 1.-THE OF limb and long armed.
His well-shaped head rests upon somewhat
slender shoulders. His face expresses force
and gentleness, manliness and intelligence,
and is lighted by clear, bright black eyes
looking through steelbowed spectacles;
and it is figured by large brown mus
tache. His speech is easy, fluent and rip
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18
SENATOR EvARTS.

A Joke Which Is Said to Have Greatly
Amused New York Senator.
Every body who has seen Hon. Will
lam M. Evarts, of New York, will re-
member his cadaverous appearance.
for, although a man above the medium
in height, he will not weigh to exceed
one hundred and ten pounds. One of
the Senate doorkeepers says few days
ago a solid, bstantial-looking farmer,
from the interior of New York State,
seated himself in the gentleman's gal
lery and asked to have Mr.. Evarts
pointed out to him. 1t was at the hour
of noon and only few members were
in the chamber. Pretty soon Dan
Voorhees, emerged from the cloak
room and strobe majestically to his
seat.
'.Is that Evarts?" exclaimed the old
man. enthusiastically.
..No," said the doorkeeper; .'that is
Mr.. Voorhees,, of Indiana
When General Logan a few minutes
later entered the chamber and depos-
tied an armful of books upon his desk
the old man clutched the doorkeeper
excitedly and said:
That's him-that's the great Mr..
Evarts. amt it?''
Again the doorkeeper explained his
error.
When Mr.. Evarts did enter the old
man looked at him long and earnestly.
..By goshr' said he in commiserat-
ing tone, 'IIl bet he boards. Wash-
ington Capital.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18
good deacon solemnly excIaims: "They
were, indeed, the gift of the Great Spir-
it, neighbors; let us give thanks to God
for themis
CARLO.
He Saved q Child at the Sacrifice OF HIS
Own Life.

He Saved Child at the Sacrifice OF His
Own Life.
How well we all remember carlo!
He was dear old dog, and belonged
to Mr.. Rhodes, the constable OF our
town.
Carlo always made a point OF attend
ing all the fires in the town. he could
mount ladder like fireman, ana
well do recollect the last of his adj
ventures. 1t was toward evening on
holiday, and few people were in the
place, as most of the citizens OF the
town were absent on popular excur-
sion. I remember feeling sadly dlsap-
pointed at having to miss the excur-
sion myself At about five O'Clock the
bells in the churches began to ring
very loud and fast; and Carlo, who
had been lazily sleeping and watching
the place, started up, and, with two or
three expressive growls that sum.
moned his master, ran with all speed
for the fire. The dog was very busy,
and Intelligent all the time dragging
down the stairs with great speed ana
care, things of every description. AS
the last house was burning. the cry OF
a child was heard in the upper story.
Of course it was out OF the question 1or
any one to go up and expect to come
back; but Carlo seemed to take In the
situation at glance. Knowing in his
dog mind that the first stories were
already in blaze, he leaped up the
ladder and jumped in through the
window. The fire and smoke soon
drove him back, but his master, who
appeared at that moment, shouted TO
him to go in, and the people cheered.
Whether he understood or not, he again
entered the window, and when all hope
of his return had been given up, loud
shout announced his arrival. He was
terribly burned, and fell before he
reached the ground; still holding with
wonderful firmness little babe.
The child did not prove to be greatly
harmed; but poor Carlos injuries were
fatal. The brave dog received every
care, but he died the next day.-E!bse
Sqatier, in st. Nicholas.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18
GOOD MANNERS.
A Few Rules for Boys as to Their Deport-
ment in the Street, in the Parlor and i'm
the Dining-Room.

Few Rules for Boys as to Their Deport-
ment in the Street, in the Parlor and i'm
the Dining-Room.
In the Street.-Hat lifted when say
ing goodbye" or "How do you do?'
Also when offering lady seat, or ac-
knowledging favor.
Keep step with any one you walk
with. Always precede a lady upstairs,
but ask if you shall precede her in go
ing through crowd or public place.
At the Street Door.-Hat off the mo-
ment you step into a private hall or
office.
Let lady pass first always, unless
she asks you to precede her.
In the Parlor.-Stand till every lady
in the room, also older people, are
seated.
Rise if lady enters the room after
you are seated, and stand till she takes
seat.
Look people straight in the face when
they are speaking to you.
Let ladies pass through door first,
standing aside for them.
In the Dining-Room.-Take your
seat after ladies and elders.
Never play with your knife. ring or
spoon.
Do not take your napkin up in
bunch in your hand.
Eat as fast or as slow as others, and
finish the course when they do.
Do not ask to be excused before the
others unless the reason is imperative.
Rise when ladies leave the room,
and stand till they are out.
If all go together, the gentlemen
stand by the door till the ladies pass.
Special Rules for the Mouth.
ing the lips and all noise should be
avoided.
If obliged to take any thing from the
mouth, cover it with your hand or nap
kin CArastian IntelIgencer.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18
READING FOR THE YOUNG.
VANITY.

There was small person who had new
muff
OF bearskin. most shining and long;
And as If one fine ornament was not
enough
She'd a tall. wide brimmed hat richly feath-
cred and furred,
And trimmed in the front with beautiful
bird
That seemed ready to break out in song.
And every one said: "What a good little
maid,
With her eyes on the ground,
And no chances aroundi
For pride is, Of course, very wrongl
It's pleasant to find
A child, with q mind
Where vanity does not belong"
" Now. though my new hat and my muff all
can see,
am really as modest as modest can be,
And unconscious" unused little Miss Belle;
=" But / certainly feel
Though my thoughts conceal
am looking exceedingly WELL
Elizabeth L. Gould, in st. Nicholas.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18
Homemade Candy.

For making candy the best of granu-
lated sugar should be used if confec-
toners sugar is not, though it is but a
trifie more expensive. Homemade
candy not only affords amusement in
the making, but is sure to be pure and
wholesome. A new receipt is given
for making nut candy, that has been
tested. To two cups of granulated
sugar, and one of boiling water, add
one large tablespoonful of butter. Boil
till 1t readily candies when dropped in
cold water. Then remove from the
fire. and stir in nearly two cups of
Brazil nuts, cut up small, and one ia
blespoonful of lemon fiavoring. Pour
out upon three large buttered plates to
stirring candy. Homemade candy is
a very desirable adjunct to the dessert.
and consoles the children when de-
prved OF the pastries or buildings that
prove SO attractive to Christian
Onion.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18

NEW YORK, March IA large crowd
assembled at Cosmopolitan Hall last night
to witness the third nights play in the
billiard match between Schaefer and
Vignaux. Schaefer was plainly in
she best form, but Vignanx looked
sick and played in spiritless manner.
Schsefer raced off with q run of 10S,
and played brilliantly throughout.
Schaefer's highest run was 10s, Vignaux
81. Score-Schacfer, 600; v1gnaux, 2ss.
Schaefer's average, 81 ll-l9, and Vignaux,
Is. Schaefer's total now is 1900 and
Vignaux 1,029.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18
FRIGHTFUL ACCIDENT.

Collision With Frightfut Results, of Two
Passenger Trains On the Edge of q Pre-
cipice Near Monte Carlo, Italy - Forty
Persons Reported Killed.
LONDON, March 1.-THE railway COL
Monte Carlo and Mentone was at point
where the road consists of a single line,
and turns by sharp curve around a
corner of a rocky ledge which constitutes
the road-bed. On one side of the track
is the precipitious face of the rock. On
the other side, 120 feet below the track,
is the Mediterranean. By some blunder
two trains were run toward eac'
other, but on opposite sides of I'll
mountain, at full speed. When the
engine drivers saw the trains approach
ing. 1t was too late to avert the disaster.
The engines came together with terrific
force and one of the boilers exploded
Several passenger coaches in each train
were telescoped into one another.
One engine driver, one guard
and three passengers were killed
outright. TWEEN ty-six passengers
were wounded. thirteen of whom are ex-
pected to die from their injuries. Two
of the passenger carriages with their &C.
cupants fell from the cliff and sank
through the shallow water and sand to
total depth of one hundred and thirty feet
The wounded have been conveyed to a
hotel at Monte Carlo where the disaster
has cast gloom over the English and
American colonies.
LONDON, March 12.-The Ddily Ne,rs
estimates that forty persons. including
seven railway employees, lost their lives
by the railroad accident near Monte
Carlo on Wednesday. Other reports,
however, do not confirm this estimate.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18
Getting Even with Roach.

WASHINGTON, March a. Second
Comptroller Maynard yesterday disallow-
ed two claims of John Roach, one of
480, $40 for extra work on the United
States monitor Puritan, and the other of
go, 274 for watching, care and towing
and floating of the monitor Roanoke
from March IL, 1877, to September "a,
1883. He holds that there is no special
statutory authority for the construction
or repair of the Puritan. In regard to
the Roanoke claim, the Comptroller says
the construction of the Puritan contem.
plated the use of the condemned material
Of the Roanoke, which was lowed from
Mem York to Chester, Pa,
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18
How Evarts Is Drunk.

What's this we hear about Hon. w.
Maxwell Evarts? Chairman Hackett,
of the Republican State Executive Com
mittee, according to a correspondent
of the Cincinnati Enquirer, speaks in
the following disrespectful terms
The help gave to the election of Evarts is
one of the things shall never forgive myself
for doing. He is eaten up with his own con
ceit. He has an idea that he can be President.
When we wanted to get him to make speeches
last fall we had to send delegations of fifteen
or twenty men to wait on him with f1attery
got him TO go to Syracuse by sending gang of
twenty Syracuse people to wait on him. He
is no use to the party.
And Senator Vedder. the gaudy
cockatoo of Chautauqua, who never
loved the lean and slippery William
any too well, thus fiauntS his scorn:
The fellows who voted for Evarts are the
that he has PLAYED the party for a sucker, .and
caught it on the first nibbie The trouble
with Evarts is what Beaconstield said of Glad
stone: ape is drunk with the eXuberance OF
his own verbosity.''
OF what use is it for a Presidential
voltigeur to perform for the editication
of Michigan Republicans, when his own
party in the great Empire State rises
up behind him and accuses him of
"playing it for a suckers" Brooklyn
Eagle.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18

In recent interview with Chicago re-
porter Sam Small gave the following sketch
of the career of Rev. Sam Jones, under
whose ministration he (SmalD was con-
verted:
Sam Jones was born at Oak Bowery,
Chambers County, Ga, October 16, 1S47.
His grandfather was an old preacher and
is still living. He is named Sam Jones. He
is living near the home of his grandson.
Mr.. Jones father was a distinguished law
yer at Alabama, and a very devout man.
Sam Jones was given a thorough English
and a partially classic education prepara-
tory to entering college, but the coming on
of the war prevented it. He studied law
and wa& admitted to the bar and practiced
for a while. Hewas married about sixteen
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18
She Made IT warm for T1,m.

Papa" said Philadelphia lad whose
father is an officer in the militia, papa
did you ever see battle?'
mo, my son."
"But didn't you ever see any real fight.
ing?"
"Hush. lad don't you know your moth
er's red-headed? You'll know more when
you grow older. "-PhiadeLphia Herald.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18
A Weak Explanation.

"Mr. Featherly," inquired Bobby, "what
is meant by bee line?''
ga bee line, Bobby, explained Feather
ly, with an air of erudition, means the
it has loaded itself with honey"
Bobby's face assumed an expression OF
perplexed amazement.
"Then what did pa mean," he asked, "by
saying that he never met you on the street
that you weren't making q bee line for
some saloon!''-N 7. Sun.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18

SECRETARY Whitney is resolved to
ruard the Government against the
wiles and strategems of contractors
which have cost the country hundreds
of millions of dollars without any thing
substantial to show for such expendi-
lures. In his instructions to the Board
on the new cruisers he says: ''The
point to be reached is making the
specifications and plans so detailed and
definite that the contractor and the
Government have their rights specifi-
cally defined. This is the only way to
insure close bidding. The contractor
ought to be able to take his contract
and specifications and plans and read
them as he would read a book and go
to his yard knowing precisely what he
has to do to comply with his obliga-
tons. ALBANY argus.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18

ping with laughter mountain brook.
Wherever humor or pathos appears 1T
comes with a masters touch. And all
through it runs, like a golden thread, a
genial spirit, which is lit up by the myriad
OF quaint Illustrations and illusions, spark
ling phrases and wonderful apothegms so
peculiar to this evangelist who, as preach
er, has made National reputation in six
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1886-03-18

A little three-year-old miss toddlinr
upstairs the other day noticed that the
servant had removed the carpet from
her room and was scrubbing the floor.
Said she: Hello, Rosa, has YOU
moved your kitchen floor upstairs. W
Buffalo Courier.