Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-02-23
BRIGHT BITS.

Puck would have raised mum Ders on front
/ doors, so hat men who stay out late ID ay have
u" uifnculty In nnding their Own houses. The
iuea IS not new, but 1t Is dangerous. Many
mau has got INTO trouble by raised figures
b 'sf0n Ir1HscriDt.
some ONE has invented theatre hat that
shuts up TO be worn BY the ladies'" That's
an right. Now let some part1 invent some
thing that VIII hold you z n an in his seat
between the acts, and two nuisances will be
a0aLed.-- Y Ov-T5st0abn Herald.
THB HINDOos are complaining about the
poor quality of idols furnished them by the
birmingham manufe turers. People who
would foist an adulteratet article Of idol upon
their customers are utterly devoid Of all the
liner and nobier attributes VI manhood.-NOr
rtStOlcn Herald
THE AUTHoRof that mysterious book, "How
TO be Happy, Though Married" says il was
Cnlcago bride who on being asked the usual
question IN which the words Love, honor
and obey occur, made the STRAIGHT forward
reply: les, will. il he does what he prom
lses me financially" That's fair, certainly
Springfield Union.
SUPPOSE you have had many prominent
tist.
"Oh, yes; and ! have found that there
tongues, In most Gases, resemble their teeth
yin what respectYn
because tn ) have been stopped by gold"
--Sea0 York JlEradI
WHAT haveyou got" queried young Jipks
Of 1.-THE waiter ~ a state street restaurant.
Everything" was he prompt reply.
Wen, L il take little, - and Jinks looked
up cx Getting to enjoy the discontinue Of the
waiter.
zone plate Of hash" sung out that func-
tionary.- Chtcdg0 Z ,,a5ter.
SCENE, an emRloy gfnt Office. Proprietor
with style as incislye as buzz aw}-Well.
Hesitating party with an apparent vocal
Observation-Disclosures I'd apply tiff
for the s-s-s-s- steady man ut good p-p-p-pay'
Proprle or-We ell, you ~0a't do.
Hesitating partY-W- ww-why9
ProprieLor-We want 4 book agent.-JVdge.
DIR. PIGHEADyisits Mr.. Goldman, the great
pork manufacturer. We'll. my Gear sir,
don't see that there's anything radically
wrong with YOU Go 10 bed early, don't drink
anything stronger than coffee, and you'll be
all right in a week.
What, you are not gong to give me any
medlcinef'
'.Certainl V not. You don't need it.D
"Rut on get your $50 Just the same"
''Yes. just So"
s.Well, / don't think its a square deal.
S'pOsin' you bleed me. put a mustard plaster
on the back of my neck, and gimme dose of
salts. Everybody that works for mos got 10
earn his salary "f-Rambler.
MINisTER-well, my little one. and 50 you
went 10 churcb yesterday, did your
Little One-fethi ttfr.
Minister-ABd do you remember, my dear,
what il was sou heard when you went to
church Yesterday
Little One-Teth, thir. You thaid one Of my
little prayers, butypu didn't thay the other
one
Ministerial indeed! And how was thatP
Little One-Why,C you thaid "Our Father
who art" but yoa didn't thay NOW lay
me-" F.t.
AIinister-O. well, my dear but people don't
go To church "a sleep. you know.
Little One-reth they do, 90. My mother
went to sleep in church lath fhunday,-
SonierCitle JoUFsdi-
TaK TRoOLY FXCLUsIvE.-
I want my good name in he 'ciety book,
For riches now have in pl. nty.
Ny daddy sold pork and my ma she could
cook
I'm Weather than at least twenty.
And nuggs, he, Of course, will be in the book
too,
His pa was law err and grabber
w hose conscience took always the liberal
view
o he WAS a ready old babber!
No doubt. too. that Bubbles will also get in,
He'srich ana he's sick-an OLD meddler,
A secret I'll give YOu-his father sold tin,
And carr ed u toO-an old peddier.
There's Pluggins. no, too, am sure will De
named
In the s'ciety book. though a ninny.
His grandfather extra good blood always
claimed,
And came mere, | think, from Vir9inny.
o -p Ell the swift press that sh III give to the
world
These nance OF the trOoiy exclusive;
And nav our not scOrn at the fellow he hurled
Who hints that our book is amusiye.
-COUrter- JOWrndl.