Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-05-13
BRIGHT BITS.

j. X. EMMET. the actor. is now his own
masager. They take many a drink together
Phi5ddelDhiG CdH.
TAXING the Bland dollar for a model. sa-
loonkeepers have introduced new drink
called the Bland smile. 1t is so per cent.
whisky and the rest water.-LiTe.
SIX OF ONE and half dozen OF the other
usually implies sameness between two
things But 1t Is very d fferent when a jury
is equally divided regarding a verdict
Puck.
THE man with name ending in 'sski" had
better look out for the police In these times
OF socialism, Il It.. and dynamite the polira-
mans club like the magnetic needle, turns
naturally 10 the Pole.-Chicqg0 Times.
HUSBAND Hmpatiently to wife)-I told you
only wan ed half a cup of tea, and, as usual
you We hled i TO the top. Don't you know
what half fu Is?
Mother IN law fgrimlyl-She oupbt to by
this time.-Aeao York Sun.
APPROPRIATE CoMMRNr-Nurse meeting
young and anxious husband at the door)-All
Is wei and you are happy father.
He-What is it,
She-Twins.
nli--EscAdn0s
MAMMA house hanting for the season,-
It's good house for a dance, Emily!
Emily-The rooms are rather small, aren't
they? s,gt . .rl
Marma twho knows how matches are
49, ~ HNsS ftAas q capital bbduCA5e
Punch. u
PATIENT Ito physiclan)--so you think that
III cover.
Physician-Yes. but you must never again
submit y0uself to any mental strain.
Patlent-But must make my living What
would you advise me 10 do?
Pm s.elan-Ah, something easy, something
that neither requires uata nor recollection
Write war articles for the magazi nes,-A
kansatu TrG0eler.
IN MONTANA the editorial rooms OF news
papers are entered by door with spring
lock, and no handle on the outside. IfanS
desire 70 enter, they must first ring a be /
The editor then res into another room
whence ne can see his visitor through the
window, and II he Is not a belligerent armed
with revolver, admits him. Owing to these
precautions. 3 Montana edItor has not been
shot IN his office for several months st, Paul
Pioneer Press.
CooL.-He-And are you sure, Sarah, you
don't love me? have been persistent. /
know, but wanted your love, Don't Won
think you'll miss me?
Shell don't know. l see so mucb NJ vou
that q M know whether Ed miss you or
not. Give me fair trlaA' ami stay away a
month. Wont you? -s-
:, He s to,t,teriyl-A month Might as well call
she-Nen, let's cali it a year thsn.-Tid-
Ras. 81
A FASHIONABLE YOUNG MAN has ACQUIRED
violin. One niguE at a social gathering he
announced that he WAS going to SEM Tor a
violin and draw a few Of Beetnoven's i'm
moral tympnonies out of il by the tail as it
we're. To his amazement all the gentleme A.,
present volunteer TO 20 fr the lidd and
40 to date none Of them have got back with it.
For dispensing a crowd no implement of war
has yet been invented 30 RIVAL the hddle.-
Texas Stfttn0S.
LIZ YOU ASK almost any saloon keeper what
book beer is, he will tell you Withhold hesita q.
Ton that he doesn't know, bat that there is no
extra charge for drinking it. other saloon
men, however, afh rim that all there is OF it is
that more matt and nops are used, and that
one glass of book beer will cause the deadly
effect tnat two gia- SIS ( ord nary beer woul 4
| TINS being clear saving OF Sc. every drink
| Others again claim that the warm spring
/ weather makes the beer become book and
stl Others that the dill renee rests entirely
with The cplored autographs in the windows
/ representing goat going IL. Finally, it is
| claimed that book beer Is brew wed to celebrate
! the invention OF beer. some time about the
| year one. A man Is permitted to drink the
| beer and believes anything he pleases about il
as long as he planks a nickel ON the counter.
| Detroit Free Press.