davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23
CHIT CHAT.

An eastern drummer who was in Knox
VILE listened TO the complaints of noun
talneer about hard times for ten or fifteen
minutes and then observed. "Why, man.
you ought to get rich shipping green corn
to the northern markets" YES orter,"
was the reply. You have the land l sup
pose, and can get the Seed!" "Yos"
Then why don't You go into specula-
uon! No use, stranger replied the
native, "the old woman is too darned lazy
TO do the plowing and the planting"
Can any one of You tell me why Gott
fried Mueller Is not at schools" said n
schoolteacher to her scholars few weeks
ago. Up went a little hand like a Jump.
ing-iack. Wells" was the interrogative
response. "Please maam," answered a
little boy with rapidity that almost took
away his breath, his fathers dead and
Uncle Pete's got the job" 1t is not ne
cessary t. say that the relative referred to
was an undertaken.
Mamm; Did you enjoy the reception
last evening, dearg Clara: Oh, ever SO
much! 1t was simply delicious, | met
Mr.. Albion and his manner is just per
fectiy exquisite. We danced ever so
many times. Mamma: Mr.. AlbionY
W hSAN - ILLS IistIiulllS young gentleman
from! Clara: | think he is from Chicago
but his manner is so perfectly English
that you would think he had always lived
in New York.
\ blind man was sitting in company
with some visitors when one of the com
pany left the room. What white teeth
that lady has" said the blind man. why"
said friend III great surprise, "hcw can
you tollf" Because" answered the
blind man, "for the last hour she has done
nothing but laugh"
The following unintentional outburst of
truth is attributed to Il French lady whose
friends tried to draw her away from her
husbands death-b bed, and she would not be
dragged away. mo. no. let me stay. 1t
is always pleasant for wife to sec her
husband die.
Josephine, the excellent maid of DR.. n,
enters the cabinet of her master-"Mon-
sleur,' she says "therc are two mutes who
ask n consultation with you Some mutes,
are they truly dumb" AT least they say
So was the reply.
Mrs. Sumpkins, think I'll run down
to Atlantic City for change" You need
a change right bad don't you, dear?"
les my iONt L men take me WIN you
for change. You've left me behind six
seasons in succession.'
Boston's youngest poet is the daughter
of Col. Quincy, an Irishman who distin-
guished himself in the late war. She is
25, slender, wears eyeglasses, and has the
reputation of being an athlete in petit
coats.
1t is reported that on one occasion
last winter, while Sarah Bernhardt was
out sleighing, she was accidentally thrown
from the cutter, whereupon small hoy
cried out: Hey, mister you've lost your
whip"
One of the strange things noticed about
the young ladies of New Haven is that
they are quite polite to the young men
of the city when the college is not in ses
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23
CRIME.

NJ. o. VAN FLEET. the defaulting county
treasurer at Norwalk, Ohio, was sentenced
to six years in the renitentiary on his
pleading guilty to forgery.
AT st Louis, Wednesday, Brooks, alias
Maxwell, convicted of the murder of c. A..
Preller, was sentenced to be hanged Aug.
27. An appeal was granted, and a stay
of execution ordered until Oct. ,.
HENRY WuDMAN, the Atwood H., wife
murderer and would be suicide, is improv-
ing, and will be removed to the county
jail Saturday, if he is not lynched in the
meantime.
In Browning township, Schuyler Coun
to, H., early Sunday morning, George
Harris, substantial farmer, was killed
by his wife, but the reason of the crimo
is unknown. The victim was so years
old, while the murderess, who has been
lodged in jail at Rushville, is 80.
AT Moundville, West Virginia, early on
Sunday Morning, Henry Campbell, until
lately manager of the Union coal works,
exploded quart can of dynamite under
a store in which Robert Ramage was
sleeping. This was followed by the ex-
plosion of eleven kegs of powder in the
store. Ramage managed to reach win
dow with his clothing in flames but soon
expired.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23
GENERAL NOTES.

NATURAL gas has been discovered at
Worstville. eighteen miles from Albany.
Ny.
THE Iowa senate has acquitted Auditor
Brown of the charges brought against
him in the articles of impeachment.
A MONUMENT will be erected by Stephen
enson County, Illinois, over the remains
of the twenty soldiers who fell during
the Black Hawk war, and whose bodies
are now buried in field near Lena, III.
TIRE shipment of lumber in large guam
titiesfrom New Orleans for foreign ports
has begun. The lumber is the product
of the mills at St. Charles. La, and the
railroads leading TO the lumber region of
the state are giving the project every
encouragement.
PRESIDENT CLEVELAND has pardoned Il
Porter Lee, the embezzling president of
Buffalo bank, who has already served
five years in the penitentiary. The main
reason given Is the need of his support
by his wife and five children. Lees
speculations amounted to about half a
million.
THE governor of Iowa has notified
Auditor Brown to assume Office for the
third time. The cost of the impeach-
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23
PAYING FOR THEIR SEIZURE.
Consul General Phclan Hands over the Fine
Imposed by Canadian Customs.

Consul General Phclan Hands over the Fines
Imposed by Canadian Customs.
HALIFAX, n. s., July 19,-United ates
Consul General Phelan to-day deposited
$500 with Customs Collector Ross, in
order to secure the release of the Port
land schOOners c. B. Harrington and
George w. Cushing arrested at Shelburne.
A dispatch this evening from Shelburne
says these two vessels and the schooner
City Point the fine imposed on
which was deposited on Saturday-hav
all sailed for the fishing banks. The diff,
Guilty raised by the Sheiburne collector
over the expenses incurred, payment of
which he demanded, has been adjusted, it
is supposed, by the owners of the vessels
paying them.
The Gloucester schooner Eliza Boynton
passed Port Hawkesbury, C. B., o-day,
homeward bound, with full fare of
mackerel. This is the first fare of the
season from North Bay. Several more
American vessels fishing i'll North Bay
are reported nearly full and others with
half fares.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23
MISSING llNkS.

Now comes the story that the moon is
on fire.
Electricity is now applied to the bleach
ing of cotton and other fabrics.
There has been no rain in certain sec
tions of Michigan for three months.
The custom of having barmaids in sa-
looms is gaining ground in San Francis
co.
But one boy is now engaged in the
special delivery at the Camden, n. j.,
postotlice, and he is not occupied one
half his time.
Among the workmen specially occupied
with tar in the Paris gas works three
were sick iii the course of seven years
When there are no prisoners in the
Nhitby, Canada, jail, white flag flies
from the staff. The white flag was fly
at last accounts.
Cleveland woman kept her saloon
open Sunday because II was Fourth of
July, and was fined SlO and costs and
given five hours i'll the city prison.
The census returns for Paris have Just
been issued. The population numbers
2,254,3 BOG souls, showing the small increase
of 1873 since the last census taken five
years ago iii 1881.
The first prisoner,to he placed in the
new lookup at Danbury, Conn, pulled off
the iron leg of his bedstead, and using il
rs a crowbar, almost dug his way to free
dom when discovered.
A poor woman went about Walla Wal
la, W. T., trying to sell her hair for
switch. She had it already cut Off but
was unable to effect sale. She claimed
to be on the verge of starvation.
Next year will be the centennial ami
versary of the first production of "Don
Giovanni" composed by Mozart to n lib
retto by Da Ponte. 1t was given for the
first time i'll Prague, Oct. %, 1897.
At one point of the Cascade branch OF
the Northern Pacific the railroad des-
cribcs horseshoe, which is two and n
quarter miles around, and only 800 feet
across the hill at the open end of it.
The Polish Alliance of the United
States asserts that thero are 900, 900
roles in this county, and recently prom
inent Wisconsin Bohemian declared that
there were 100000 Bohenians here.
The Iron reservoir, contracted for by
Fall River, Mass for its high water ser
vice, will he 73 feet in diameter, 81 feet
high, with capacity of over l,00O,OOO gal
Ions, and it is thought the largest ever
built.
A big turtle was caught near Lincoln
Parish. La, and its head was cut off.
Three days later n chicken found the
head and was picking at it when the jaws
snapped, caught the chicken and killed
it outright.
A man in Campbell County, Ga, had
thirty-six boys old enough to fight in the
last war, and twenty three of them we're
killed. He has been married nine times.
Other interesting facts are gradually
coming in.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23
GENIUS OF CHAIRMAN JONES.

Chairman Il. +. Jones of the republican
national committee has got another idea.
The fact is Chairman Jones must have
bought patent incubator warranted to
hatch ideas at any season of the year.
II is only a little while since Chairman
Jones by means of his patent idea incu-
hator hatched a scheme to employ Judge
Fullerton of New York to go to Wash
ington and deliver am argument before the
war claims committee of the house in favor
of bill to pay the confederate bonds.
long, strong yell from the republican
party press that the democrats were scri-
ously considering the rebel debt question
in the house. The argument was made
by Judge Fullerton and was quite rs full
of constitutional law and quite rs devoid
of common sense as that argument of
troops could not coerce sovereign state.
Blacks constitutional proof that it could
not be done was conclusive. but the
federal troops did coerce dozen
sovereign states just the same. So it was
with Judge Fullerton's argument. 1t left
question of tha liability OF tho govern
ment of the United States to pay the
rebel debt. But that didn't pay the debt
nor disturb anybody, unless it was Chair
man Jones who paid for the argument.
The party press did not respond with en-
scheme didn't work.
The latest output of Chairman Jones
patent idea incubator is letter to the New
York Evening Post from an imaginary
mugwump at Indianapolis expressing his
disappointment at President Clevelaud's 5
violations of civil service. Chairman
Jones made an awkward mistake in 10
eating his mugwump at indianapolis. OF
all the places in the United States that
was the poorest to plant a mugwump.
Nobody ever heard of mugwump in
Indiana before and nobody knows of one
n that state now except Chairman
Jones and he don't. Had such an indi-
vidual existed at Indianapolis somebody
would have discovered him during the
campaign of 1881.
Chairman Jones of the republican
national committee is an ingenious man
made fortune in protected iron, and nc
doubt has a valuable patent idea incuba
tor. but the practical politicians of the
party should not let him go off until the
game is in sight. He needs to be sighted
by some politician who knows better
than to locate mugwump at Indian
apolis.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23
VOL. Xxx.
CONDENSED TELEGRANS
FIRES AND CASUALTIES.

Two hundred acres of cranberries,
near Tomah, Wis, have been burned by
forest fires, entailing aloss of about $25,-
900.
A RAIN, hail and thunder storm swept
over Marion, Ind, section Monday after
noon, leveling trees, wrecking windows,
and running crops. Corn was riddled by
the hail and entirely destroyed.
Four tramps were struck by passen-
ger train, Friday morning, near Bloom
ington, H., two of them-brothers by the
name of Pickett receiving mortal in
juries.
SEVERAL structures at fraser, Tama
county, Iowa, were destroyed by fire
Wednesday morning. The total loss is
about $4,000, with only $500 insur-
ance.
THE loss by fire i'll the Terra Gotta works
at Rayonswood, l.. l., amounts to 100000,
and nearly 200 men were thrown out Of
employment.
THE undergrad of Knapp, Stout &
Co, of st. Louis, covering 40 acres along
the river front lost $500, 900 worth of stock
by fire. Fifteen engines were called into
use, and several fremen were overcome
OUO.
TH& boiler-shop of Josewh Fossett, at
Wellsville, Ohio, was wrecked by the ex-
losion of an upright boiler. A girl nam
ed Clara Driscoll, living in and adjoining
house was killed, and her sister fatally
burned.
DURING a thunder storm III Eric coun-
ty, Pa, Tuesday night, telegraph and
telephone wires were leveled, and houses
and barns were struck by lightning and
burned \ large quantity of lumber was
also consumed. The losses aggregate
100000.
TmREE and crops have been destroyed
by forest fires near Cedar Springs, Mich.
Seven acres of wheat and four farm hOus-
es were burned in the vicinity of Mound
City. Around Whitehall and Montague
the forests are afame, and the smoke is
so thick that it is difficult for the inhabit-
ants to breathe.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23
Drumming up Business.
II ,l1;aa D.ff

A man once fell off Missouri river
steamboat, and his fare being paid, the
boar of course steamed rapidly around a
curve and was soon lost to view. While
struggling in the water skif approached
and a man in it called out:
Hey, there, pardner, hurry rp!
For heavens sake take me in your
boat before I drown!' replied the man in
the water.
"Ain't quite ready fer that percecdin'
yet my friend" returned the first speaker
beginning to back off. Come can't wait
all day."
What do you mean"
'Mean, don't you know me?"
No"
"Well, I'm the Coroner of Morton Coun-
ty, and if you want a fair funeral and Il
frst-class verdict and not go floating
down the river without friend you want
to hurry up and get under. There are n
couple of boys getting full over in the
town and I'll expect them to shoot and
I'll have to tend to those cases.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23
FURY OF THE FLAMES
A Large Lumber Yard at ST. Louis
Totally DESTROYED by an Uneon-
Querable Fire.
insufficient Water Supply Involves De-
struction of Millions of Feet of
Lumber.

ST.. lours, Mo, July a0.-A fire. which
proved TO be the largest and most de-
structlve of Its kind that has ever occur
red In this city, was discovered at about .
o clock this afternoon i'll the lumber
yards of Knapp, Stout & Co, at the cor
ner of Angelica street and Bremen street.
An alarm was immediately turned in and
tive engines were soon at the scene. They
were, however, owing 10 the poor water
supply, unable to cope with the flames,
which, driven by strong wind, soon COM
munlcated 10 the nearest lumber piles and
were making rapid headwsy toward the
Union Stock Yards, the destruction of
which for time seemed inevitable.
The wind soon shifted to the opposite
direction, however, and they were saved,
but the lumber yards were doomed. In
the meantime more alarms had been
sent IN, and twenty engines were called
out. The water supply, however, was en-
hrely insufficient for the emergency, and
the flames leaped from pile 10 pile of the
dry lumber with incredible swiftness. The
fire was not confined TO any one portion
of the yards, for sparks and burning
spllnters were carried in every direction
by the wind, and the whole territory of
the yards, covering thirty five acres Of
ground, seemed to be one mass Of burn
ing lumber. The efforts of the firemen,
which would evidently been truitless if
directed towards subduing the flames,
were from his time employed in keeping
them from spreading, and in this they
were successful.
The fire was allowed 10 burn itself out,
and at the end of four hours 25,0o0,No0
feet of lumber were a total loss. The
contents of the yards were mostly lumber
of superior grades, and the loss ON this
account is very heavy, 100000.
The company's stables were also con
Sumed, but the horses were rescued. The
total insurance cannot at this hour be
ascertained, but it is estimated at S275,-
600
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23
Snrest Trananilizer Of the Nerves.

The Surest tranquizer of the nerves is medi-
cine which remedies their supersensitlyeneSS by
invigorating them. Over-tension of the nerves
always weakens them. What they need then, Is
q tonic. not a sedative. The latter is only useful
when there is intense mental excitement and an
immediate necessity exists for producing quietade
of the brain Hostetters Stomach Bitters re-
stores tranquility Of the nerves by endowing
them with the yEor requisite to bear. without be
ing Jared or disturbed unhealthfully. the orii-
nary impressions produced through the media of
sight. hearing and reflection. Nay, it does more
than thiS-it enables them to sustain q degree of
tension from mental application which they
would be totally unable to endure without its as
sistance. Such at least, Is the irresistible con-
cluSion TO be drawn from the testimony of bust
ness AID professional men, Htterateurs. clergy
men. and others who have tested the fortify ing
and reparative influence OF this celebrated tonic
and neryine.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23
A Parents Wise Resolve.

Wife Well, Ned. what do you think
Charlie wants now: He asked me to-day
if l wouldn't help him tease fou to buy a
bicycle
Indulgent Father (who once had ambi-
tons himself.) Bicycle: Nonsense The
boy can't have it, tell him to go up in the
attic, and fall down two flights of stairs.
1t will be about the same thing and save
me Sln0.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23
A SagaciOuS Mare.
Virginia City Mountain

A remarkable instance of the sagacity
of mare has come to our notice. John
Fletcher owns a mare, which he runs in
a pasture adjoining his house. The mare
has young colt at her side. A few
nights since, after Mr.. Fletcher had re
tired, he was aroused by the mare com
ing to the window of his house, and by
paving, neighing, and in every way pos
sible trying to get his attention. This
continuing for some time, he got up and
went out and drove her away, and return
ed agaiu to bed; but she Immediately re-
turned, and, if possible, increased her
demonstrations. He again went out,
when the mare came up to him and rub
bed her nose against him, although always
before she had been very shy, then ran
on few yards before him, continuing
neighing; then, as he did not follow her,
she ruturned to him in the most domon-
strative manner. He attempted 10 drive
her off, struck her with stick and fol
lowed her a few yards to frighten her
away. As soon, however, as he turned
towards the house, she returned and tried
in every way to prevent him from doing
so. He then remarked that her colt was
not with her, a fact that he had not no
ticed before, as it was quite dark. 1t oc
Cured to him then to follow her, which
he did. So soon as she saw he was doing
so, she ran off before him, stopping every
few yards, turning around to see that he
was still following, then again running
| on, keeping up her calling, until she
reached distant part of the field. where
she stopped at an old prospect hole"
On coming up with her, she again com
menced rubbing against him, and drew
his attention to the hole, where he soon
discovered the colt. 1t appears it had
slipped into it, and was unable to get out,
and the mare had taken this method to
obtain assistance. Being unable get it
out alone, Mr.. Fletcher went for some
of his neighbors, and with them return
ed. While they were taking the little fel-
low out, the mare manifested the most in
tense delight, and seemed almost beside
herself with Joy; and afterwards, when
the men had got out of the hole, she
came up to Mr.. Fletcher, and placing her
nose on his shoulder, gave every sign of
gratitude that human mother might un-
der similar circumstances. Who will say
the horse does
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23

finger, which Ayres had chewed of,
and both eyes were closed up. Ayers
was not in much better condition. As
soon as they were able to resume their
work Ayres got a new cord. and it is
scarcely necessary to add that Williams
always obeyed tae signal. This was the
origin of the bell-rope now considered
Indispensable.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23

Two ladies who have taught a certain
room in the Ithaca Central school have
been married within two years past, and
the Journal narrates the fact that there
is somewhat of strife" to get In the
way of third stroke of the hymeneal
lightning.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23
A CANADIAN SCHOONER SEIZED.
Her Captain Sails From Toledo to Cleveland
Without paners.

TIVI NUTIWIII NTIIIN TTWIH IUItUU 10 'TVNVIUHU
without Papers.
CLEVELAND, O., July 19.-Another Cana
dian vessel is in trouble here. The
schooner Jessie Scarth went into Toledo
on Saturday from Canadian port. For
some reason her master did not report or
clear. On arriving here he called on the
collector of customs. Thinking that the
Scarth was an American vessel called Nc
Kinnie, he was disposed to be lenient if
the proper papers could be obtained
from Toledo. The captain took a train
to that place and obtained the papers,
but in his absence the fact that he sails
"Canuck" was discovered and he will pay
fine of 500 or be tied up here and his
vessel StriDped
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23
A W Woman : secret.
Philadelphia Call

Clara-If you won't say word, Amelia,
III tell you a secret. Fanny Feather
brain
Amelia-Is going TO be married TO Mr..
Clara Arthur Litevaite, and they're
going to
Amelia-Sarafoga in
Clara-Juiy. Not soul knows it but
Us,
Both-Hov nice,
One-half of the children born into the
world die before they reach the age of
i've years.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23

THE house is likely to agree to the river
and harbor bill as it passed the senate,
and in that shape it will probably pass
over veto. If it is vetoed and passes over
a veto, it will make the next house repub
lican in all probability.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23
The Trouble with Yerger.
~ esaf.r

This lime dust here in Austin is ruin
Gus to the eyes," said Jones.
eds
Yerger has become so near-sighted that
he doesn't bow to his nearest friends
when he meets them on the street.
Smith-It's not lime dust that prevents
him from recognizing his friends.
Jones Perhaps he has boil or rheu-
matism in the back of the neck.
Smith-It's not that, either.
yones-What is il then:
Smith-He got telegram from Wash
ington last week that the senate would
probably confirm his appointment. It's
pride that prevents him from recogniz-
ing his friends
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23

Mrs. GHs GRANT will in a few days re-
ceiye second check for $250,00o from
the publishers of Gen. Grants memoirs.
Mrs. Grant will realize over half million
dollars on the book.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23

HoS. II. A. COOPER. of Racine, is making
an active canvass for the republican
nomination for Caswell's seat in congress
and has fair prospects of success.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23

The Saengerfest at Milwaukee this
week promises to be the largest gather
ing ever assembled in that city. The
fest opens to-day, and the city is already
full to overfowing.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23

The Boston Pilot figures up the work
of the 49th congress thus: Congress has
done nothing and the president has
vetoed it,
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1886-07-23
Imperrious to Injury.

New York Herald.
Traveller Ito ticket agene)-Gimme
ticket to New Brunswick.
Agent-The next train does not stop at
New Brunswick.
Traveller suits me. I've umpired
too many games of ball between the New
Yorks and Chicagos to be afraid to get
off train that's only jogging along at so
miles an hour.