The Carbon advocate. [volume] (Lehighton, Pa.) 1872-1924, 1886-06-26

Ihat al I've got To say, and hope
you'll bear it in mine. by the way,
owe you for two years subscription, and
one of these days III call in and pay it.
Don't forget to let yourself loose ON the
tariff; good-by."
As the man who wanted more lightIon
the tariff passed out, little nervous
looking person came in and took the
vacant chair. .--
"Ah," he said, with little smile that
didn't look strong enough to be out; "ah,
my dear man, see you are absorbed in
thought, as an editor always should be.
And that reminds ine that YOU are ne
glecting- almost totally neglecting
science Too much of politics, too much
of politics, my dear man.. your paper
will never grow in circulation while YOU
Neglect science for politics. You should
devote not less than four columns week
TO science. That's all | came in to say.
Be in some day and pay you my sub
scription. Good day; but don't forget
to give us plenty of science"
The footsteps of the man who wanted
science had not gone beyond the editor
hearing when third visitor entered and
took the vacant chair as if he were ac-
customed to sit in it.
81 am sorry to notice that you are ne
glecting politics just at this important
PERIOD" he said, kindly but gravely.
'1ou should strive to keep the vital
principles of our party constantly before
the people. l like your paper in all but
its lack in this respect, and some day,
perhaps at the beginning of next year,
| will subscribe for it. | see it now
every week at Browns Office. If YOU
would write about five columns of fresh
political editorials every week you
would see your paper going right up in
circulation. That's what told Brown
yesterday, and he agreed with me. A
story and scientific rticle.occasional-
ly and a little local matter and some
marriage and death notices to please the
women are all well enough, but | can
tell you that a country paper to amount
to anything, and have any influence, has
got to be full on political matters. That's
all ] want to say now. When you want
any points on politics I'll be glad to help
you out And, by the way, don't forget
that I'm candidate for the legislature:
good-day."
The next visitor who took the vacant
chair that sat in front of the village edi-
tors desk spoke as follows:
II stopped in to-day, sir, to tell you
that DO not want your paper any longer
In some reSnprts II 10 s-e..l s--r--., qua
you do not print enough news matter
You should have full page of news at
least. don't care anything about your
protective tariff and your tariff for reve-
nue. only, or anything of that sort.
want the news when | take a paper.
want full account of the murders and
suicides and railroad collisions and
divorce cases. Don't send me the paper
any longer. I'll come in and pay you
what owe you when l have sold my
corn; good day"
And then there was light step at the
door, and person wearing a severe
cOuntenance and a shawl came in and
tnnl- tba ,.ooont ,I,air
II am very sorry" he said, in meas
ured tones, and with fixed and critical
stare at the end of the editors nose-''I
am very sorry to notice that you are
giving in your columns so little atten-
tion to the cause of Prohibilion-the
noble cause of Prohibition. You must
rouse yourself upon this great question
and give your readers page of it week
ly. l am not a subscriber to your
paper, but borrow it every week of my
noighbOr and loan him the Banner Of
Light in exchange. So you will observe
that | have been one of your faithful
readers and | know just where you fall
short of making a good newspaper. l
will leave you a few tracts from which
you should make liberal extracts from
time to time. You will notice that this
one entitled, Dash the Cup Awayr
is written by myself. You are at liberty
to print it in full. And when / come
across anything particularly good in the
columns of the Banner Of Light I'll cut
it out and send it around to you. You
have grand opportunity to make your
paper grow in circulation and influence,
/ and l hope you will come boldly to the
front on the right course and no longer
continue to devote your valuable space
TO trivial matters. by the way, have
you few exchanges that you are done
with9 All, that will do; thanks; good
day."
In the door the man in the shawl
passed person with merry twinkle
in his eyes.
Il like your paper-it is first-rate," he
said,as he dropped into the vacant chair,
Except that it does not contain humor
enough. Why don't you fill her full of
jokes and bright things by the funny
fellows and make YOUR readers laugh?
Nobody cares cent for those political
editorials and those scientific articles,
and that stuff about the tariff you print.
That puts me to sleep. Give us plenty
of jokes to shake mans liver up and
let the tariff take care of itself. That's
all. Be in to see you again when I've
more time; ta, ta."
The next person who took the vacant
chair had countenance as solemn as a
secondhand hearse. He didn't look as
If he had smiled more than once in forty