The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1886-07-23
cRANks AND Lovers.

rAs rrosbse they Cause the Policemen at
The Capitol Building.
Cranks are drawn to the capitol like
birds about a beacon light. There is an
officer placed ON duty up in the dome
expressly to keep them from jumping
on. Not day passes while CONGRESSES
in session that they are not at the capi-
tol. Cranks. newly-married folks and
lovers tend naturally toward the dome
with view of getting nearer to heaven.
There is . turn in the stairs that is
known as the kissing corner. 1t is pro-
verbal that lovers never pass mp to the
dome without stopping there tO-tske
breath. It is said that properly CON
stituted girl always gets tired when she
reaches that point, and young man
was never known to object. The turn
il 80 situated that two persons standing
there can be seen from neither above nor
below. 1t offers . great temptation to
rest. The whispering gallery has be-
come so well-known that young folks
who don't want their secrets carried
to the other side of the dome and
made public property of by the echoes.
are very careful to keep quiet when
they reach that elevation.
Cranks, if they arc recognized as such.
are not allowed to so on the dome. but
they are always hanging around for an
opportunity to slip up. Several at
tempts have been made by these adven-
turers to step out into space in pursuit
of eternity, but as yet only one has been
successful. One man was caught by
the tail of his coat just as he stood
ready for a plunge forward. Many
have been caught calculating with in
sane eyes the distance to the concrete
below. They have always been induced
to go down in the ordinary way by the
winding stairs.
Very innocent and harmless looking
men will stop at this point as they go
climbing up the crowded stairs, and
will at once become engrOssed by the
beauty of the great circular floor of the
rotunda. and their eyes will get bright
and round ut the prospect. Then they
all begin climbing over the rail in great
hurry. as if they had forgotten some
thing and hadn't time to take the stairs
to get to it. A policeman always APP
pears at this juncturc, and the visitor Is
advised to take his time about it and 60
by way of the stairs.
Il can tell them on sight" said the
policeman to reporter. Il can tell
when they come for jump. and l
never give them a chance. There is
something in their eyes and the way
they look about them that reveals their
purpose. But presume any crank who
got on the dome would feel it to be his
duty to jump off. So we think it best
not to let any cranks 60 up"
mo. we don't stop lovers. he added,
in response to an intimation that this
variety of crank was not dangerous.
s.They never have energy enough to
jump off. They have to stop at every
landing to rest. Sometimes they make
a good deal of noise about it. The kiss
ing corner?' Yes. of course they stop
there! But the real genuine article
amt satisfied with that. They stop at
every turn in the stairs! Let's see. now.
Let's make a calculation how many
kisses real spOOny couple who
are visiting Washington on their
bridal tour will get in on a
round of the Capitol. No, they
can't kiss in the elevator; that's crowd
ed; nor in the gallery. but they look AS
if they'd like to. There's the tomb Of
Washington under the crypt; they al
ways put their heads close together to
weep over that, and never hear You tell
them it's empty. This is particularly
good place, because it's dark, and there
are SO many narrow aisles near it.
They'll score half dozen before they
finally get out. Next is the engine
room, and then the crypt. After that
they get uneasy. It's all light in the
library and in the rotunda. But they
make up for this on the way to the
dome. Now, just count the landings
and you've got it. But it amt fair to
call them cranks. It's only temporary
with them. The genuine jumper, the
man with mission. and the man who
takes all his clothes of are all we reckon
on as cranks. There is no doubt that
the jumping cranks are in the majority.
l expect they come great distances for
the express purpose of leaping from the
dome. If they were allowed to go up
there would be an inquest every day."
= Washington Star.
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