The Abilene reflector. [volume] (Abilene, Kan.) 1883-1888, 1886-03-11
HYDROPHOBIA.
History of Its Origin, Together With q
Thoroughly Reliable Preventive.

Within the last year or so this malady
has become very fashionable, especial
ly in New Jersey. Although it has
been commanding unlimited attention
and many disciples lately. it has always
been terrible rage. (N. B.-This last
is double back-action pun.)
History states that this. like all great
discoveries, was indirectly the result OF
an accident. Owing to the high stand
/ ing of the discoverer's relatives and
his prominent position in society, his
name is magnanimously withheld from
! the public.
After a careful and laborious re-
search find the particulars as follows:
Twas dark and Silly night when the
Ebon goddess had thrown her sable
robe over a slumbering world, that the
| discOverer, by new and heretofore I'M
explored path. made midnight ex-
cursion into the interior of another
mans watermelon patch. Hearing a
noise he accelerated his speed, and
while midway in the wonderful aero
bate feat of clearing a ten-rail fence
at one leap with 4 twenty-five pound
watermelon in his arms. he discovered
the attack of hydrophobia Immediately
to the right of the lower extremity of
his spinal column. OF course, in the
rapid descent consequent, the melon
was broken to pieces and the man got
mad. Ever after this the mention of
watermelon BY his enemies drove him
into desperate paroxysm of frenzy.
Hence the mongrel word from hydro,
water, and phObia. fear. Owing to the
rapid increase of the disease and as a
precautionary measure, midnight eX-
cursions of all kinds should be discount
tenanced.
Conversely to the inverse rule, it
does not follow that because a man is
afraid of water he has been bitten by
mad dog. Some of our most prominent
citizens, who have never seen a mad
dog. have perfect horror of water.
Further investigation has led Scien-
fists to the conclusion that the chances
of rabies from dogs bite are greatly
exaggerated. The foregoing remark
has got me all tangled up in logic and
in a position that it is difficult to ex-
plain. / mean that every dog that
bites person is not mad, yet | never
heard of good-natured, conscientious
dog biting any one just for fun.
However, before the person that has
been bitten becomes alarmed and
startles the whole country. he should
ascertain if the dog was really mad.
He might not be mad-only out of
humor. Perhaps his liver wouldn't
work, or his stomach was out of order.
In this case all that is necessary to do
is to give the dog Seidlitz powder and
put arnica on the wound.
On the other hand. when a person
has been bitten and appeals to char
liable and sympathetic public to pay
his or her expenses on a transatlantic
voyage, the public should inquire into
the circumstances. Perhaps there may
be eXtenuating evidence to exonerate
the dog.
When / see a person raised in a
Christian land beating or otherwise
maltreating poor, starving dog, or
see the pampered DANES of wealth and
fashion heartlcssly place their children
in the care cf careless nurses and be-
stow the love and tenderness they owe
to their own flesh and blood on ugly
pugs and spaniels. have difficulty in
the feeling that these little
MISUNDERSTANDING creatures are
derelict in their duty.
Statistics show that this great and
glorious Republic leads every nation on
the globe in hydrophobia-producing
On inventory we have large
stock and well-selected variety, rang
ing in price from six for five cents to
two or three thousand dollars each.
Only the rich can afford to catch the
rabies from the last named. The poor
and INDECENT who are suffering the in
of depressed times and for
the necesSarieS of life, generally try and
ret along with seven or eight of the
cheapest kind.
| have known people who were poor
and had no credit. to 90 out in a pa
-riotic fit and commit larceny in order |
70 have 4 half dozen on hand.
Thus we nOurish and foster danger, |
md when one of our pets gets on Il |
and bites fifteen or twenty in |
locent people. we excuse ourselves on
he ground that we didn't know it was
oaded. But what is the remedy? l
,laim to have the only one of any value.
Pasteur' sis experimental. mine is practi-
,af. At first | thought of charging
fifty dollars for the recipe. but out of 4
disposition | will give it
o every man, woman and child in the
United States on condition that they
rect million dollar monument over
he last of my sad remains when l de-
part hence.
Select dog to your fancy, tie rope
Iround his neck and lead him TO some
ecluded spot and saturate his carcass
With lead from Colts navy six revol-
,er. When its spirit wings its gentle
light, remove the skin and sew up the
'erforations; have him stuffed and
Put stout and well-made
nuzzle over his mouth and an iron col
ar around his neck; attach a log chain
o the collar, then take the dog down
ellar and fasten him securely to an
ron ring in the wall. and build an iron
ence around. By sleeping and spend
NC the most of vOur time on the roof
gu can feel tolerably sccure.-PecE's
I'm.
A BLIND WITNESS.