The Washington critic., 1886-01-19

| enough 10 prevent his acceptance.
From that day to this the two men have
been together. Colonel Lamont is a
little man and blonde.
s~s
General Pat Collins of Boston, j..
Randolph Tucker of Virginia and
Martin Foran have announced their in
tcntion OF retiring from Congressional
lifc with the present Congress. Col
I lins, who has q streak of Ohio life in
| his career, and relatives in that be-
loved commonwealth, came over to
Fornn's the other day, while the PioiR-
dedlor correspondent was talking with
the Cleveland statesman. "Ive got u
letter from Tim Leahy at Mansfield, ]"
he said. 'Lcahy is solid for you Mart.
He says Foran can run for Governor
any time he wants to" "But ! don't
want it," was Foran's rcioindcr.
Come out and practice law with me,
Collins; that's better" "I'll think
| about IT,"
4#~
Says "F. II. r." in the Atlanta
| Constitution 81 once knew young
college graduate who, for year, had
managed to earn living in Washing.
ton lawyers Office on salary of SO n
week. But, by some unkindly freak
of fortune, he finally took u $1,000
clerkship in the Treasury. He boasted
that his previous ill.paid experience
had taught him wisdom, and he entered
upon his new position with the firm
| determination TO save money and
thrive But he raised the lid of Pan
dora's box when he entered the Treas.
ury. At the expiration of his first
years service he had spent every cent
| of his salary and was $500 in debt.
How did you get away with itP
asked one of his friends. Il invested
It, sir, he replied. in one of our most
substantial products, wheat Around
all the great Departments in Washing
ton are clustered bucket shops where
on margin you can deal in railroad
stock or grain from ten dollars worth
10 thousand. From the Fifteenth
street entrance TO the Treasury n
stone could be thrown into ten of these
enterprising establishments. Even
tclcgraphy Is proving too slow in this
business here; and one firm, in lieu of
| New York quotations by wire, has put
up mechanical contrivance by which
| quotations on fictitious stocks are given
every half minute. By this new specu-
lative process man can, by continual
bad luck, in five share lots, lose five
dollars every minute of the day
| Clerks are not seen in these resorts in
great numbers, for the Department
hours and stock exchange hours are
simultaneous.
A*#
Attorney. General Garland has been
forced TO take conspicuous ground as
an anti.drcss coat champion. He re-
maincd away from the Presidents state
dinner rather than attire himself in
regulation costume. A friend, while
smilingly demonstrating with him,
said: "You ought not to take stand
like that. II exposes you to much
badinage. You are left so alone in that
position. "Aloner exclaimed the
Acknowledgement. "Why, man, I've
got the whole State of Arkansas Mt my
back" "You don't mean that" pro
tested the friend. II do" insisted Mr..
Garland; II mean to say that If there
is q dress coat in all my bailiwick |
don't know of il, and that / should hate
10 be convinced there are any in hiding
there"
W.
The Hon. James McIIale has returned
to Chicago from Washington, and he
makes haste to deny the story that he
went East to subvert the Government.
He tells the Chicago Ne,cs that he and the
National Administration are on the
best of terms, and he doesn't know
when he's met more cordial gentle
man than President Cleveland appears
to be. Last Sunday Mr.. Van Pclt and
Mr.. Mcllalc called at the White House.
Mr.. Cleveland received them smilingly.
$50 this is Mr.. Van Pelt, and you,'
said he to jim, "you are Mr.. MclIale
Come now, boys, you must let me call
you Van and Mac what do you say
Certainly; by all means" said the
two Chicago statesmen, simply
paralyzed by the Presidents S cordiality
well, then, Van and Mac" continued
the President, heartily, you'll have tc
excuse me to-day, but / want you tc
call around next June after Congress
adjourns, and wc'll have real good
old fashioned talk about trout fishing
and blackberrying."