Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1886-08-20
DALZELL'S SOBRiQUET.
And the Fun lie Has with It--A Name
without n scandal.

treated him with great respect and un-
affected familiarity, but that the higher
officers of the army and the ladies gave
him the cold shoulder generally. His
name sounds gross and common TO
them and they seldom speak as they
pass by. They usually like a bit of
gold lace, Il shoulder stripe and re-
sounding title, but for l-sobrquet of
the private they do not even try to con-
ceal their contempt.
"Why. sir, exclaimed the private,
sin more than twenty years of almost
constant travel and at over a thousand
large gatherings that have addressed,
] have not been formally introduced to
n dozen ladies or officers, though | must
have met million of them! They
hurry away from meetings and do not
care TO be introduced in any formal
fashion, for YOU know, the convcn-
tional introduction stands for mutual
confession or concesS on at the least Of
the equal standing of the parties. No
body insists TO be introduced TO only n
private, while all the boys who even
prvatcs, rush in and introduce them
selves with a familiar slap on the
shoulder, n hearty grasp of the hand,
and "IIello, old fell, how are you
anyway"
1t is amusing TO hear the private talk
about it, He says he is not hurt at all
by this. rather enjoys it and likes it all
the more because it is just the way it
was in the army, nobody noticed you or
spoke to YOU but the men of your own
rank. The little private is ignoble, de-
basing so at least the good ladies and
officers regard it. and it cannot be
helped.
General Sherman once advised him
to drop it.
agreed quickly responded the pri-
vatc with his characteristic sarcasm,
Il will if YOU drop yours. 1t is about
all you and I have" Old Tecumsch
smiled grimly and dropped 1.-THE sub
ject-not the title.
self, one day said Fred Douglass, as
the private reports it, Charles sumner.
Mr.. Giddings, Mr.. Phillips, Mr.. CARR
son, Mr.. Higginson and myself have
often spoken from the same platform.
They had to be approached with great
ceremony after the meeting, and it was
hardly more difficult to get an intro
duction at the White house than to
them. But rs for me, well but a few.
and they old maids or old cranks, cared
TO be presented, and the rest passed
along in slencs-I mean of the leading
people. But rs for the under sort of
common fellows, they would come up
with boorish familiarity and introduce
themselves with an offensive air which
plainly showed that they considered it
quite condesccnsion to speak to Mig
ger at all. "
And so it is precisely with the pri.
vate. as he is free to confess himself
II have laughed over it thousand
times said he. though il cost me
seat in congress and the governorship
of Ohio. ten years and more ago. My
sobriquet is vulgar the last thing in
the world | should have adopted.
Preachers, popular lecturers and show
people come along and by their elo-
qucncc or good looks (and | have
both attract the ladies' and aristocrats
whom | uniformly rcpcl by my pie
bcan pseudonym and self-imposed APP
pellation of yulgarity. They work
their mashcs and pass along in
twinkle, while | plod along with the
namelcss rank and file beneath their
notice.
"Aas!" exclaimed the private, as he
shook ont his golden curls and closed
one eye igniicantly, Il am doomed to
celebrity by glorious scandal The
nom de plume. private, is essentially
pleban and suggestive of extreme pow
erty, obscurity, mediocrity, ignorance,
stupidity, vulgarity and worse. 1t is
the negative of fame, wealth, distinc-
ton and honor. If it means any thing
it is sneer at all this as vanity, and
no one who has probed the private's
grim, sarcastic nature as have. can
have failed TO find that this cs at the
bottom of this democratic name par ex-
cellcnce, the nom d. plume, private. y
1t is n sheer in cold type.
1t signifies all that and more, and it
is not pleasant name to even plebeian
ears. and positively offensive to aristo-
cratic ears. however large and capa-
cious. No wonder aristocrats with la
dies never introduce them to the pri-
vaie, and so dislike the very word, and
no wonder the private feels him
self doomed to die in green,
very green old age. the happy
husband of very happy wife,
whose mutual security was founded in