Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1886-04-15
AN AGRICULl-URALIsT.
| A Professor whose Cats Took Their
own Time In sprouting.

own Time I'm sprouting.
Prof. j. Cudigo Pbilensbury, after
having spent the best years of his life
in editing an agricultural journal, de.
cided upon buying farm and settling
down to put into practical shape the
many ideas which he had expressed
through his paper. The professor was
delighted when he shifted the free air OF
the country, and, as he stood around
'bossing" the plow hands, he wonder
ed why he had been content to sit in 8
dingy room.
One day the professor sent the fol
lowing order to n grain dealer in town
'Pkease send me fifty bushels of seed
oats, best quality"
The shipment was made. The pro-
fessor had been so imperious with his
hired men that neither of them would
offer him any advice, in fact, he had
told them that when he wanted a sug-
gestion he would ask for it.
The shipment of oats came. The pro-
fessor had asked for the best quality and
was highly satisfied with the result.
The land was prepared with great care
and the oats were sowed and narrowed
in, then rolled and then narrowed
again. Every day or two the professor
would 90 out and make an examination
to see if the oats had sprouted. He be-
came impatient, for oats in neighboring
fields had come up.
One day while Colonel Subberly, a
wcll-known planter, was visiting the
professor, the great agriculturalist ask
ed:
Colonel, are your oats up yetp"
"Oh, yes; the field is green"
II don't know what's the matter with
mine. / sowed them three weeks ago,
but they haven't sprouted yet. Wish
you'd come out and make an examina-
ton"
They went to the field and began to
scratch around.
"Scc, they haven't sprouted," said
the professor.
81 don't see any OATS" the colonel
replied.
Here's one, Colonel"
..Oh, no; that's sawdust. The ground
is thick with it."
"Sawdust!" gasped the professor.
"Of course"
us it possible that have sowed saw
dust?"
at seems that you have" The colo.
mel laughed. The professors face grew
red. He called his foreman whom he
saw standing short distance away.
"Confound it, Jackson he exclaim.
ed, didn't you know we were sowing
sawdust instead of oats?"
"Yes, sir"
"Well, why in thunder didn't you tell
me?"
because, sir, you told me that you
wanted no suggestions-said that you
had been editor of the Farmers Scienti-
fc and Practical Cultivator so long
that you knew what you were doing, SC
we all thought that we'd let you 60"
Hes got it on you, professor" said
the colonel.
That's all right said the great
agriculturalist, .'but if there's any law
in this country I'll make that merchant
smoke"
He hurried to town and called on the
merchant, restrained his angr as well az
he could, and said:
Have you got an order that l sen
you some time ago"
"Yes, sir, think So"
"Let me see it.
The order was produced. The pro
fessor looked at it several minutes. II,
prided himself on his bad writing, ant
it was some time before he could reaC
it.
What does this order say-what art
these words?" the professor asked.
''Sawdust," replied the merchant,
"Sawdust the deuce. Anybody car
see that they are seed oats"
Leave it to anybody in town."
"All right"
They called in printer who hac
worked in the professors Office.
Read this order" said the profes
sor.
The printer took the order. ut is a
plain to me as print" said he. Then h
read: please send me fifty bushels o
sawdust-best quality Oh, its plail
enough"
The merchant roared. The professo
said: ado any of you know who want
to buy an excellent farm? l have on
that | desire TO SELL l am tired of farm
ing. l shall return to the editoria
room and make myself useful to m.
country. l think that the drinks are Of
somebody and it strikes me that an
, the citizen. A man who cannot write
better hand than do has no bushes
with a farm. Come, gentlemen.