Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1884-1886, 1886-06-27
THE RAMBLER.

THE RAMBLER.
Hot hot! was the item that everybody
offered me yesterday, and the look I gave
them would have made icicles in any other
climate. The boys had an immense society
joke to tell me yesterday morning: The
night before dude of great length but
sparcely settled, dressed in fine suit and
carrying cane about as able bodied Is .
lemonade straw, and as erect - lamp-post
and little erecter, promenaded in great
style up Douglss, when some chaps OF the
bad boy species, pinned piece Of paper on
the narrative Of his coat, on which was
written in very legible hand, "This suit
only Sc. 25." He did no: observe the deco
ration aud promenaded up and down in
great shape, followed by large crowd OF
the street gsmin.
There is a rumor afoat to the effect that
the ladies are going to give up their piano
playing and SIGH and go into specializing in
real estate. No, girls, don't; for heavens
cake don't monkey with real estate. Shun
il a. you would beau constructor or an ice
cream and strawberry festival. The way 1T
is now, since the adjournment Of roller
skates and progressive euchre, man would
give most anything to snuggle up near
fair creature and forget his daily cares, but
how long will this last if the girls go into
the real estate business? What temptation
would there be for man with the
very worst type of female suffrage
on him to shove his head up to the shores
of mouth. around the suburbs Of which
hover new additions. o, no girls, If you
don't want to become badly shock people,
shake the real estate craze. A short time
sgo had an awful dread that enough men
could not be found to sacrifice themselves
on the altar of county offices, but of late 1
find that some hypodermist has been stuff
ing TIE hides of quite number, full OF pa
triotism, and that nothing would give them
more Joy than TO serve the dear people.
Ny attention was called TO the fact that
the new sewer on Topeka avenue has not
improved the odor st the intersection OF
Douglas to any alarming extent, and after
nosing around there awhile myself l was
convinced that, in the language Of the
health ordinance "the nuisance had not
been ebs.ed."
Talk about nuiscsnces. l ran onto one
yesterday, the offense Of which is the rank
est that have encountered in the last %
years of my political life, and as fer that
matter as hurried my thoughts down the
shaded avenues of my recollection, L failed
to run onto anything like it. / went 10
visit IN acquaintance who is persuing his
studies at the university of which w. W..
HAYS is the principle instructor, and right
there / ran into the very wors.
case of nuisance in this town, which
if not abated before long will graduate
as able corps of joint stifis as enc could
wish to see The sheriff is making high
kick, and he has good reason for that sort of
of exercise.
/ went into Justice Thomas Office ard
there found him End his colleague, Justice
Walker, discussing the feasibility of hiring
some fellow 10 DO some crimins, caper.
Their business is dull.
A pair of diminutiye mules ran off with o
street Car yesterday, down near the Santa
Fe depot, in spite of the efforts of two men
VINO we're older and larger than the mules,
to prevent them. They succeeded IN demol-
ish;Dg buggy.
Great guns. but wasn't there fun there
for awhile trying TO teach them mules their
PROPER place in society. A crowd stood
around aid the tao wanted to deport them
selves in manner betting the occas ion,
bat 10 snch false delicacy disturbed the aim
Of them mules. They realized that their
time 10 strike had come and examining the
surrounding landscape they bol.ed the con
ven,ion and all the men could say was,
"me toe" ard the mules went on with the
play, singing their own accompaniment.
A horse and buggy was upon The street
sheGd and ioreseeing a catastrophe, tie pl-
lot Of the mules caught onto the wheel but
soon found that he was in tow Of the wrong
boat. Business had no longer any attrsc-
tions for the clerks in the freight office, and
everything was set aside for the grand
finale. After few pufis OF steam the driver
suddenly lost his grip and several buttons
off his pants, and the mule swent on with the
play. They sailed right through buggy
wheel, and after n stormy voyage came into
port away up town.
met Billy Ross, the famous bard OF the
Minnesota, and asked what the news wss.
''Oh, everything is new. New potatoes,
new corn, new railroads, new booms, new
candidates, new babies, new everything" .