Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-02-12
BRIGHT BITS.

AN1EhIcAN PUBLISHERS who print Gtlbert's
WOrks anu fail to send him a share Of the pro-
- escape nis insults and contempt. Ergo:
Herald.
TIE New York Sun has an article headed
what the Fishermen WANT Everybody
onkns 70 know that what the Hshermen want
- soIhethlng 10 eat and q place TO dry their
ers'-Louis0iiie C0Hsisr-Jourfs4i.
A CORRESPONDENT wants to know if it is
pfiOPer =. 70 urge young lady TO sing az an eve
nlng gathering after she has refused once. IL
is proper 70 urge little. but not too much,
lest sue should change her mind.-Pitts5ar0
Chronicle
CUPID TO PAIR or LOVERS
ma Good. You bill aud coo and spoon;
II shortly to the altar get you,
Ahen see you through the honeymoon,
ana after that is over, quit you.
Boston Courier.
LADY vIsIToR-"I suppose, hr. swipe, you
WIZ soon 40 abroad 10 study the old IN asters."
MT. SWipe-"Well. really. | am afraid that
IN the study of the old masters should forget
my own individuality, and come to paint like
one OF them. "-Harpers BGsar.
A GIRL WITH GREAT HEAD,-"But, Ma
re Thought you despised Mr.. Slimson."
Then what did you marry him for?''
so that he would STAY down town evenings
and not hang around me all the time CHI
cR10 Noa0s.
LADY Ito applicant)-"What wages will you
expect as nursegn
ApplicAnt-"How ould is the baby. mum?n
Ledy-'Seven mouths "
Wid0ut laudanum, mum, two
collars an half wake; wild laudanum, two
dollars. "-Rarper's Basar.
BARNUM's SHOW PROPERTY at Bridgeport,
conn. which Is on the list at 800 COO has
oeen exempted from taxation by the Board of
teller. it would be pretty mean Board OF
heHef that would tax the greatest show"
when each member Of the Board has an an
nual pass In his pocket for himself and fami-
ly .-Norrtst0Grn Herald.
A BLACKSMITH IN Buffalo broke his helper's
head with hammer because he talked 80
much. A syndicate is now being formed TO
BUY up enough votes TO send that blacksmith
70 congress ana buy hlm four new long
handled hammers, with letter Of credit at
the nearest hardware store. There's peace
for this old land yet,-BrOokIyn Eagle.
hAGIsTRATE-'WhAt is the plea Of the
p risener a the , bar, charged with being i'm
pllcased 10 the Roberts hale robbery ?''
PrisoDer-'I beg1eaEs 70 state your Honor,
tnat 1 was there, but slmply as tool for
Prisoners Counsel-"T would explain TO
the court that my clients name is Jimmy -
NOT so EAsY-"Hah Of this bottle of wine
is gone. II seems TO me that you should be
able 10 stand the temptation" said Judge
Pennyouuker TO his celored servant.
Dat ar am easier said den done, boss"
AT any rate You should come out ike
man and say that you stole the VINE"
Dat ar am easier done den said, boss. -
Ies1s Strings.
GONE HERE, Tommy, and sit with me until
your sister comes down. l want TO tell Won
about the railroad accident I've just been
through"
''Guess you didn't get hurt, did your"
NO. but how did yea know THAR"
'Why. because paw said the other day that
your cheek would carry you through any-
thing. philadelphia Press.
GOOD GROUNDS FOR HoPE.-"Do you think
yon Will be acquittedg' asked a New York
gentleman OF prominent man who was in
dicted for br berry.
yes. think sO.'
Has your lawyer given you grounds to
think SOP
NO" responded the hopeful client, "but
have given him grounds TO think SO, I've
decided 70 Kim all my real estate rs his fee. %
Tssas Sytfn0s.
ELDERLY FEMALE lat the gate Of heaven)-
Scan | come IMP"
st. Peter-"Are you married."
Elderly femAle-"No, sir, | never had a
chauce.h
St. Peter-"H0w old are yong"
Elderly female-"Forty-seven sir, and I've
worn false hair for twenty-one years.
St. fet r ITO assistant)-"Give this lady a
pair OF golden wings studded with diamOnds
and marx her 100 in truth. "-Eeto York Tines