davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Wilmingtonian., 1886-05-01
THH LIME KILN CLUB.
Advice to Grocer--The Torpedo Chicken
VIII Have to BE Boyeotted.

VIII Have to BE Boyeotted.
VI should like to spoke a few words to
Brudder Amazon Green" said the president
hs the meeting opened and the hail grew
quiet Brother Green, who Is a young man
with mellow look and hitch in his gait,
advanced 10 the platform in hesitating
manner and the president continued;
"Brudder Green, rarn dat you am on de
pint of gwine inter bizness fur yerself. am
told dat you am soon to open co'ner grocery
an butcher shop combined
ayes, sah."
HI'ze glad dat you am about to make a
start in life, and l desiah to drop few hints
which may be of some value to you. Brudder
Green, de grocer who gives fifteen ounces to
de pound may wax fat fur few years an
git to be referee at wrestlin' match, but
Justice has her eye on him, and when the ole
gal gifts around to it she'll gin him dose dat
will sot him back for twenty years.
aDe pusson who sells fifty-cent an two-shil-
lin tea from de same chist may get along
powerful smart for while but he's only
coaxin' bile to grow on his nose. When de
bile comes he'll pay out more for flaxseed
dan he has made on tea.
"In sellin' beefsteak study human natur'.
Some men doan' object to pound and a half
of bone to half pound Of meat, but we
amt all built arter dat fashun Doan' kill q
hundred dollars WORT of custom fur de sake
of sellin fo' cents WORT of bone
"Whe it am expedited dat You will hide
de bad taters in de middle Of de measure,
doan' misunderstan' de public an water yer
'lasses as well
"De paper which you buy fur two cents
pound kin be weighed up wild goods dat sell
fur fifteen and nobody will kick but doan'
emagine dat gives you license to roast beans
wild your coffee or keep filling up de vinegar
barl wild rain water.
"Be keerful whom you credit Oar am
plenty of people in dis world who like to pay
debts, but dar am about de same number who
will jump you as soon rs de books balance
fo'teen cents agin 'em
"Doan' cease gNyine to church belase YOU
am in business, but next time de pew-rentin'
comes off take a seat n leedle furder back,
Lots Of people hev somehow got de ideah dat
modern bizness man, doin' bzness arter de
modern fashun, has got to do a heap o wrest-
lin wild his conscience in case he adopts any
pertickler brand O. religion.
"De public will expect you TO make some
mistakes in addishun, but be leede keerful
about it. Make 'em in favor Of de public
about half de time"
NOT ONE
A communication from St Louis made in
quiry if any member of the Lime Kiln club
would be attached to any base ball club, cir
Gus, theatrical company or dime museum
this coming season. Ii none lad been en-
gagged were any members open 10 engage
mentl
Seventeen members arose in chorus, and
seventeen voices We're seeking to get the
pitch, when the presidents gavel came down
and ba
The Wilmingtonian., 1886-05-01
lie Wonnd N ~ ~ IniI.

a day on two since Mr. Shaw. pf llr Con.
-ndatcd Virginia mine. found 10 watch wing
in the snow where 1t lHl evidently bccn
dr' lrd lN someone working in ~. about
the nlnr Alr Shaw wrutca u"ti,, ru this
effect posting it T., thn idr Of the window
TO which the MN cainu To- giNc their uamrs
when going on or conui- If thr iuin,~.
\ little Fr,nrlman soon zane m shaw
and asked;
You find one yutrh Mi>tuirr Shaw"
"Ncs. sir, said Mi Shaw Have Won lost
a watch"
"Nvs. ~alIr
tan van describe il.
Oh, e. soirc; yer perfectly"
Wei, what is it like"
My watch he ya- a silver watch.
Very good. What kind Of face"
Veil, he had lie, face yidr oyrr
What k!ud OF chpu
Ono lccdle brass ..haiu.
What Kind Of key was nu the rEa.i.
He have no key At all / wind lGr1 Lv ze
tail
The watch wa ,tcm-windcr and ths
frcnchnan had given an accurate descrip.
tion Of his property, even dow1 10 "ze .ail.n
Virginia Enterprise
The Wilmingtonian., 1886-05-01
HERE'S A STATE OF THINGS
A Glimpse Into the Future, When Man
Becomes Extinct,

There are 60, 900 more women than men In
the neighborhood of Boston, and the relative
Inference in the numbers of the sexes ara
gradually Observation-Disclosures note.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11
MEXICO, MISSOURI THURSDAY, FEBRUARY II. 1886.

you do anything. Such an idea is no
part OF Gods plan of salvation. 1t
is purely pagan notion borrowed
from flato's pagan philosophy. One
of the absurdities of all modern
theology is that it must have along
with it, attached to it, and as part
Of 1t a philosophy. Hence all the
talk about divine essence, God head,
trinity, &c. Even John Calvin had
Michael Servetus put to death because
he did not agree with him on his
dogma Of trinity. This dogma is one
OF the outgrswths of mans free
will just as sin is the outgrowth of
mans lust. A man sins because he
can and wants to, of his own free
will and accord. Man gets drunk,
chews tobacco, tells lies, swears,
commits adultery. steals. robs, MUIR
ders and tries to preach his dogmas
for Christs gospel. Nov God don't
compel any man to do any of the
above named acts. He only permits
him under his alternative writ of
mandamus, but when man makes
his return to that writ he would
cheerfully give all that his abomina-
tions brought him in this world
houses, lands, money, goods and
chattels, h0nors, preferments, polit-
ical, social and intellectual as a fee
to the humble Nazarine to appear
and plead his cause at that, the last
court of appeals. This is no idle
talk. "But l say unto you that every
idle word that men shall speak they
shall give account thereof in the day
of Judgment" Mat. xii, SO.
Now, reader, take the plain
teachings of Jesus and his Apostles,
put them beside the mystical ele-
ments of modern theology and which
will you choose? 1t is not all gold
that ghtters, neither is all genuine
piety that smanates from the pulpit.
Look around and see if you cannot
discover some indication of a life of
ease-some bread and butter and
raiment and shelter in much that
passes current under the name and
style of theology. But to conclude
When the mists have rolled in splendor
From the summit of the hills,
And the sunshine, warm and tender
Falls in kisses on the rills,
We may read loves shining letter
In the rainbow of the spray;
We shall know each other better
When the mists have cleared away.
NJ. Y. DUNCAN.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11
b. r, CantlbDrn.

b. r. Cauthorr, Of Mexico. is a
candidate for the Legislature from
Audrain county. We are not per-
sonally acquainted With Mr.. Cauthorn,
but have seen some very commend
able press notices by those who know
whereof they speak, setting forth his
superior qualification for The position
he is seeking. He has held Office in
Audrain, snd is consequently familiar
with the people. We will say we
haven't met an Audrain man who
opposes him. In the early history of
Sturgeon he was a merchant here,
and perhal some Of our pioneer
citizens remember him. We are not
particularly in the Audrain contest,
hut make announcement Of her candi-
dates in the interest of our Sailing
township readers.-Sturgeon Lender.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11
CURE FOR PILES.

Piles are frequently preceded by a
sense of weight in the back, loins
and lower part of the abdomen, caus-
ing the patient to suppose he has some
affection of the kidneys or neighbor-
ing organs. At times, symptoms of
indigestion are present, as fiatulency,
uneasiness Of the stomach, etc. A
moisture, like perspiration. produ-
cling very disagreeable itching. af-
ter getting warm, is a very common
attendant. Blind, Bleeding, and
Itching Piles yield at once to the
application of DIR. Bosanko's Pile
Remedy which acts directly upon the
parts affected, absorbing the Tumors,
allaying the intense itching, and affec-
ting permanent cure. Price fifty
cents. Address, he DIR. Bosanko
Medical Co., Piqua, Ohio. Sold by
Dobyps & Gibbs. 29-1y
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11
The Cost Of a Bushel Of Corn !.

There Is a statistician who desires
to impress everybody with economic
facts. Said he yesterday: do
you see that man over there? Well,
he's farmer There he goes with
a friend /; they're going to get drink.
The farmer will pay for it, Now, let
me see. That man will sweat two
mortal hours next spring to piow
enough ground to raise one bushel
of corn. That bushel of corn he will
sell for less than 80 cents, He ia
going in there now to spend 30 cents
for two drinks. Therefore, the farmer
and the corn have parted. Now, let
me tell you what becomes Of the corn.
A bushel of corn makes seventeen
quarts Of whisky-four and quarter
gallons. The distillery gets it's first
prolific cents a gallon. There
you are: $2 for that hushel OF corn.
Now the Government comes in, 90
cents gallon-S3S5. added to The
50, makes S5.S5. That brings the
product of the bnshel of corn down
to the iobber and the wholesaler and,
finally. by several stages, TO the re-
taller. By the time it reaches the
latter the bushel of corn or its pro-
duct of four and quarter gallons
has been reduced oae-half, which
means eight and half gallons.
There are sixty drinks to the gallon
that is the average-eight and a
half gallons mean 270 drinks at Is
cents each--there we have S46.35 as
the consumers price for bushel Of
corn which the farmer raises aud
sells for 80 cents. Who says there
is no industry in this countryl But
tire farmer We saw just now spent his
whole busbel OF corn 10 the price Of
two drinks, and the people who do
not till the soil get away with S4G.05.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11
The Mexico LEDGER saws that B

The Mexico LEDGER says that B.
r. Cauthorn will be candidate for
representative to the next legislature
from Audrain county. A long per-
sonal acquaintance with Mr.. Cauthorn
leads us to congratulate Audrain
county on having such men in her
borders who are willing to sacrifice
their time for the benefit of the peo-
pie. Mr.. C. is a farmer and stock
raiser and an excellent business man,
and while he is not speaker he is
blessed with an uncommon amount
of ''horse sense and is affable,
pleasant and agreeable at all times.
His sagacity and integrity will soon
place him among the most influential
members of the House, and if each
county would send such men to re-
present it in the general assembly
there would soon be no word breath
ed about corruption in the legisla.
ture. By all means send Mr.. eau
thorn to Jefferson. - Montgomery
Cfon6ord
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11
The Distrikt SkooImaster

There IL one man in this basement
world alwus look upon with pheel-
ings ov pity and respekt.
Pity and respekt, az a general
mixtur, dent mix well.
You will find them both travclin'
around amung folks, but net often
GROWN on the same bush.
/ had rather man would hit me
on the side of the head than tew pity
me.
But there IL one man in this world
to whom l alwuz take oph mi hat,
and remain uncovered until he gets
safely bi, and that is the distrikt
skoolmaster.
He leads a more lonesome and sin
gle life than an old bachelor, and q
more anxious one than an old maid.
He iz remembered just about az
long and affectionately az a glide
bord il bi thavin' pack pedler.
If he undertakes to make biz
skolars luv him, the chances are be
will neglec. their farming.
The skool committee make him
work for haff the money a bartender
gets, and board him around the
neighborhood.
Emmy man who has kept a distriki
skool for ten years, and boarded
around the neighborhood, eught tew
be made major general, and have
a pension for the rest of his natral
days, and horse and wagon tew dc
his going around in.
I had rather burn coal pit, oil
keep the fys out Nv a butchers shop
in the month of August, than med
die with the distrikt skool Dizziness
JOSH BILLINGS.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11
Who n Right?

NJ. Y. Duncan and r. Gallaber, the
ministerial disputsnts in the Mexico
LEDGER, have got down to baptism,
immersion, dipping aud sprinkling,
and the thermometer sbeut the LIN
GER Office stands at 40 degrees above
zero. First we read Mr.. Duueab's
Interpretation of the scriptures and
about conclude that Mr.. Gallahcr
doesn't understand what be IS taking
about Then we read Mr. Gailaher's
Interpretation and wonder how Mr..
Duncan can be so obtuse as to fail %
see that he is wrong Then We sit
down and study awhile aud conclude
that it doesn't amount 10 a straw
which Interpretation is correct since
all the water in the world viii not
save man IL he doesn't "pull for
the shore" with the proper stroke
Richmond Democrat.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11

f. M. Johns to Z. M. Busbey,
east IL, lot 6, block 5, original town
of Mexico-$400.
James b. Jesse to g. G. Dawson,
40 acres, miles south of Mexico
S1,1OO.
Robert johnson to Silas X. Gil
pin, 20 acres 2 miles west of Mexico
|-S375.
L. 4. Wink to Edward Kelly, so
acres IL miles northeast of Mexico
81, 500.
Frances NJ. Akridge to E. j. En-
mis-, lot 8, block 10, Laddonia--
81, 900.
E. J. Ennis to Fred Carey, lot 8,
block 10, Laddonia-S800.
Lou Bell to Sallie Meadows, LOT
60x114 feet adjoining Laddonia-sl.
H. G. Shepherd and George N.
Wales to Lacount Coil, 60xll4 feet,
part block 2, John A. Parsons add.
to Mexico-$280.
II. G. Shepherd and George N,
Wales to Lacount Coil, lot 60xll4
feet in northeast corner block 2,
John A. Pearson's add. to Mexico
$3.50.
David Pike to John A. Smith,
22x120 feet, part lot s, block 20,
Vandalla-S2 $50.
J. w. Howard to james Ryan, lots
13 and IA, Barnes addition to Mex.
ico-$550.
P. H. CAN'T to S. V. Overbagh
lot 10x60 feet, part lot 2, block 13
original town of Martinsburg-s25
VIM. Munday to VIM. II. C!anton
26 acres, 9 miles north of Mexico
$500.
Geo. Robertson to Geo. II. Ed
wards, 40x120 feet lot /, block 5
Laddonia-s495. Quit claim deed
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11
A Cloud Of Witnesses.

In many instances the opium-eat-
ing habit has been contracted through
the use OF narcotics, prescribed by
physicians during sickness. Many
remedies which claim TO cure coughs
contain morphia or opium, and it can
easily be understood what bad ef-
feet they must have on children.
The new remedy-Red Star Cough
Cough Cure--is entirely free from
these dangerous ingredients, and the
mass Of testimony which has already
been collected in its favor from all
parts of the country is proof Of its
wonderful purity and efficacy.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11
TELL HER,
And Ten Chances to One She VIII
Find Light.

1t is not infrequent that wife
mourns over the alienated affections
OF her husband when she has made
no effort herself to strengthen and
increase the attachment. She thinks
because he once loved her he ought
always to lave her, and she neglects
those attentions which engaged his
heart Many a wife is thus the cause
of her own neglect and sorrow. The
woman deserves not husbands love
who will not greet him with smiles
when he returns from the labors of
the day, who will not try to chain
bin to his home by the sweet enchant-
ment of a cheerful heart. There is
not one in a thousand so unfeeling
as to withstand such an influence
and break away from such home.
This is the mans story.
A woman's advice is generally
worth having, SO If you are in
trouble tell your mother, or your
wife, or your sister all about it. Be
assured tfat light will flash upon
darkness. Women are commonly
Judged inexperienced in all but pure
womanish affairs. No philosophical
students of the sex thus judge them.
Their intuitions or insight are the
most subtle, and if they cannot see a
cat in the meal there is no cat there.
A man should keep none of his af-
fairs from his wife. Many a home
has been saved and many a fortune
retrieved by q mans full confidence
IN his wife. Woman is far more a
seer and prophet than man, If she
be given fair chance. As general
thing, wives confide the minutest of
affairs to their husbands. The men
who succeed are those who make
confdants of their wives. This is the
wife's story.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11
Fact.

Away with this bosh about the
arrogance of the Cockrell papers de-
stroying the Democratic party in
Missouri. If sticking to an honest
man and faithful servant is calculated
to drive off a few cranks and SORE
heads, we say for Gods sake, and
the states sake, and the party's
sake, let the honest people of Mis-
souri, stick to the old hero with all
their might. 1t will be one of the
grandest and most honorable sticks
ever recorded in the history of the
state. There is no danger OF the
Democratic party suffering injury
from its members standing by such
gentleman and statesman as Fran
els M. Cockrell.-Slater Rustler.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11
Ladies as Commercial Travellers.


There is a new racket on the
road" said a commercial traveller.
ITS female drummer. met her
the other day, and she is a daisy. \
of course she travels for Chicago
house, and she sells goods like a
January thaw. She has been out so
long now that she is as independent
as hog on ice. She sits in an orai-
nary railway Car and charges up
sleeping berths in her expenses, just
like the rest of US. She walks to the
hotels from the stations and charges
up the hack fares, just as we do. She
beats the landlord down to Sl.50 o
day and charges the house $3.50 in
the regular old style. She can take
care of herself every day in the
week, and she knows how to order
up bottle Of wine and work II on
the expense account too. Why,
when | saw her last she was q new
silk dress ahead of the firm, and by
New Years proposed to have q seal
skin sacque out of her expenses.
And that isn't sll. She has half of
the hotel clerks in the Northwest
mashed on her, and the way the little
rascal knocks 'em down on her bill is
caution. She has a regular trick
of staying over Sunday where one of
her admirers runs the house, and she
walks off Monday morning forgetting
to pay the bill. What does she sell?
That's the funniest thing about It.
You would think she would handle
jewelry or millinery or dry goods,
wouldn't you? But she doesn't.
She sells gents furnishing goods, and
the young men who usually keep that
kind Of stores buy Of her as IL they
hadn't seen a commercial traveller
for six months. And she is dandy
poker player, too. She handles the
cards awkwardly, and acts as If she
didn't know q full hand from two
pairs, and raises 81 on deuces, and
nearly cries when t'other fellow
shows up three of kind, and then
gets excited in a big jack pot, and
raises the opener and bets the limit
and raises back and scares t'other
fellow out, and slides into the deck
little pair of skies or sevens or \
bobtail as innocent as you please,
Bluff? Why, she has bluff on her
like the Wisconsin River. She's
daisy, and tell you it's mighty lucky
for the boys that there amt any
more like her on the road"
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11
A Reliable Article.

For enterprise, push and a desire
to get such goods as will give the
trade satisfaction Dobyns & Gibbs
the druggist leads all competition.
They sell DIR. Bosanko.s Cough and
Lung Syrup, because its the best
medicine on the market, for Coughs,
Colds, Group and Primary Com
sumption. Price SO cents and 81.
HampIes free.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11
An End to Bone Screaming.

Edward Shepherd, of Harrisburg,
ILL.,, says: Having received so much
benefit from Electric Bitters, I feel
it my duty to let suffering humanity
know it. Have had running sore
on my leg for eight years; my doc
tors told me | would have to have
the hone scraped or leg amputated,
I used. instead, three bottles oi
Electric Bitters and seven boxes
Bucklen's Arnica Salve, and nay leg
is now sound and well.'' Electric
Bitters are sold at fifty cents a bot
{ and Bucklen's Arnica Saive a,
25 cents per box by j. F. LleweIlyn.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11
The charge is frequently made, by

The charge is frequently made, by
ladies themselves, that American
women are rude to each other,
when the masculine social factor is
absent. A young lady remarked,
apropos of an invitation to high
tea, that she dreaded going. She
was bright, clever girl, highly pop
ular with her gentlemen acquain-
tances. On being questioned as to
why she expressed dread, she frankly
declared, "Oh, don't get along with
the girls; I do not like them, nor do
they like me. There will be no gen.
tlemen present and the affair will he
dull; for there will be nothing hut
gossip talked and / know 1 shall
have weary time" One of "the
girls" so sarcastically spoken Of
might have retorted, had she been
present. that the young lady was un-
popular because she was in high
favor with the male half of creation,
and that envy thereof on the part OF
her less admired sisters might be the
reason that she "did not get along
well' with girls. But it is a fact
that too many ladies are not popular
with their own sex And it is doubt
less true that it is because they dc
not take any pains to make them
selves agreeable. They reserve theil
conversational efforts, their mos
pleasing manners, for the delectatior
of mankind, and do not deem it nee
essary to do anything to secure th'
esteem and friendship of women
The remedy is in their own hands.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11
Ed. J. A. Headington, of Mexico

Ed. j. A. Headington, of Mexico,
No., spent several days in Benton
vile this week, and preached several
able discourses in the Christian
church. He left for Fayetteville and
Fort Smith, yesterday. He is look
ing at our country with a view Of
locating, and would like to trade
some good property in Northern
Missouri for Arkansas land. He viii
likely return to BentonviIie before he
goes home-Bentonville (Arkansas)
Journal.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1886-02-11
Good Results IN Esery Case.

d. A Bradford, wholesale paper
dealer Of Chattanooga, Tenn, writes,
that he was seriously afflicted with
a severe cold thst settled on his
lungs; bad tried many remedies
wltbsuts benefit Being Induced to
try DIR. Kings New Discovery for
csasumption, did so and was entirely
cnsed b use of few bottles.
Since whid be4fke he has used it In
his fan.ily DE- all Coughs and Colds
with best esnlts. This is the expe-
rienee Of housan,is whose lives have
heen saved by this wonderful discov-
err. Trial bottles free sat j. +.
Lieweliyn drug store.