davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12
Tho Rajah's Wife.

The following anecdote illustrates the
extreme delicacy Of sentiment among The
Rajpoot women. The celebrated Rajah
ley Sing Of Amber had married a princess
Of Harvati, whose simple provincial man
ners and dress subjected her TO the badin-
age Of the refined and superbly dressed
ladies Of the court OF Amber. One day
the rajah began playfully to make re-
marks about the sweeping jupon
of the princess, and, taking up q
pair of scissors, said he would reduce
il to the fashionable length. Highly
offended at this playful remark, she
seized his sword, and, assuming q threat
ening attitude, said that i'll the house to
which she belonged they were not used
to such jests, that mutual respect was the
guardian not only of happiness but Of
virtue, and she assured him that II he
again dared TO insult her he would find
the daughter of Harvati could use a
sword better than tlae Prince of Amber
his scissors.-Hindoo in London Queen.
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12
LOVE IN GREENLAND.
A Place Where Sweetness Is Very Long
Drawn Out-A Nights Courtship.

A Place Where Sweetness Is Very Long
Drawn Out-A Nights Courtship.
In the countries Of the extreme north the
nights are six months long. What a place
that must be to spend the evening with a
young lady, Just think Of it. Think OF 1t,
ye poor Young SWANS who are Obliged to
make your calls no longer than the miserable
space Of four or five poor hours Think Of
the picnic that an Eskimo dude has when
he starts out for call on his inamorata He
arrives at her house just after dark and the
two sit in the front parlor for few weeks,
not realizing that it is long past the hours OF
cleaning and that the room Is as dark as the
tricks of Q politician. Then her mother
comes in and lights the gas, saying: Il
should think you children would have better
sense than TO sit here in the dark.
Then the old lady skips out to give the
Young people a chance, for she doesn't believe
in young girls losing time, and in Greenland
there is only one night in the year. After
her departure the young couple sit on the sofa
and look at the photograph album for week
or two. This is no novelty to them, as they
know every photograph in the book, from
hers, taken when she was in short skirts, 70
his, taken only yesterday morning, represent
ing him leaning over the back Of chair,
twirliag his alleged mustache and smiling 50
persuasively that be looks as If he were try
ing to get trusted for a half dozen shirts.
They sit closer and closer as they begin to get
more deeply interested in the photographs.
She snuggles up to him and points with her
sealskin gloved finger TO the portrait Of her
cross-eyed aunt, who was bitten by Spit
dog the night before
This is all very pleasant, Of course, and
they sit holding es,h others hands and look,
tnr volume of Bvrenfs peserx tntS sssk
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12
What Tbey Saw About Liberty.

II Miss Liberty had been with New Workers
during the war she would have been lynched
or ridden on q rail lsure. She is the biggest
copperhead in the country.-St Paul Herald.
There is a strong suspicion ahoat out west
here that the reason Bartholdi made his statue
bare headed is because TO put a hat on her Of
the present fashion would make her about 800
feet higher-St Paul Herald That's one
reason, and another is that if the old gal had
been topped out in style, she would have sx-
cited the envy rather than the admiration Of
American women.-Gorham Mountaineer
At last the drummers are outdone Liberty
has more cheek than any Of them--St Paul
Herald,
Liberty Enlishtening the World ought to
try it on some of the other New York
papers North American
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12
THE GLOBE REpUBLIe SUNDAY MoRNING DECEMBER Il,


In front Of them and held out his hand to the
man and said:
Hello! Jim; going down TO New York;
YES" replied the other as they shook.
Kind Of bridal tooer, chr
YES"
Got my old woman along, | scer
Yves" was the j-rky reply
well, Mary" he said, rs he turned to her
80 you've got another man, ehi"
"NOne o your business, Tom Laphaml"
"Oh, it amt, Same old Mary, see. That's
just the chin music you used to give me when
| asked why dinner want ready"
you shet up"
That's more of It'll Seems ALMOST as il We
were living together again, and ! was dodg
ing the broom stick. shall be married Sat
urday, and she's four times as good looking
as you arc, and has big farm and 5000 in
cash"
Don't believe it,"
"Same old Mary. Sounds perfectly nat
ural to hear you call me a doggoned liar"
See here, Tom," said the bridegroom,
who WAS red clear back TO his collar button,
please let up. This is All embarrassing situa
tion for me"
Yes, s'pose 1t is, Jim, and I'll do any
thing to oblige OF course, you've married
my old second hand wife, and Of course you
don't want to be twitted Of it Isee the pint,
Jim, and Tn done"
Mary got up with both fists doubled up
and her fighting jaw on, bait the bridegroom
Quieted her, and the divorced husband said
20 me as we walked to the rear of the car:
Yes, it's kinder embarrassing to Jim and
/ don't want to hurt his feelings Kinder en-
barrassing for me, too, and for Mary. First
time | ever had divorced wife, or met her
married to another man, and didn't exactly
know how to take it.-M. Quad in Detroit
Free Press
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12
A Gallon Of Molasses for . Pin.

One fine day Scrigglesville man came 70
town with pailful of CLAIMS, which he sold
Then washing out the pail carefully, he had
gallon OF molasses poured into it and started
for home. Feeling the wight OF his burden,
he put stick through the pail and hung the
pail over his shoulder. Presently, jogging
along in an distracted fashion, the Scriggles-
vile man espied pin in the road, and being
Of a frugal turn he stopped over to pick It
up. This seemed to the molasses to be as
good a chance as it could find, and it promptly
stepped out Of the pail and walked all over the
back Of the Scrigglesville mans neck. Good
heavens!7 Gasped the Scrigglesville man, as he
struggled to his feet and viewed the devasta-
ton wrought upon the scenery, "a gallon Of
molasses for pin. "-Rockland (Me.) Courier
Journal
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12

L would give the name OF Ins noVel WeTe
It not for two reasons-viz-: First, because l
do not wish 20 advertise house that does
not deserve it, and second, because there Is
nothing to prevent the landlords coming
down here to see about it There is really
nothing about operating hotel like bis which
would in any way interfere with his going
away for a year or two and leaving it in the
hands OF the same cockroaches who are run
ming il now.
paid tie bill and 50 added another to the
long list Of bills which have paid.
This hotel has the Old style Of annuncistor,
consisting OF large, dropsicsl green card with
q fat and faded tassel hanging to It, while the
other end passes through the ceiling and Is
attached to one OF the raftsrs Of the building.
You pull this denuncistor three timss for
drinking water, and then you go down to the
well sId get all the water you want 1t made
r,s feel perfectly at homs, for that is the way
do when am at home
The chambermaid at this hotel was Q tall
colored man named Isaac, who had formerly
been the concierge Of livery stable on the
Rue de Butternut at Nashville.
He was emancipated during the war, and
received the freedom which properly be
longed TO a whole plantation Instead OF di-
viding it up and giving the other slaves their
proportion, he had retained, and, as it were,
embezzled, the freedom of twenty seven other
people.
As q result of this, he had more freedom
than had He came into my room fire.
quently while was changing my linen, but
did not come in when needed assistance.
Shirts are so made that the gentleman who
adopts them must do 50 by inserting himself
through the base Of the garment gradually,
emerging at last through the apex thereof.
Isaac never raped on the door before enter
ing, for his whole system was 50 saturated
with the blessed boon Of freedom that be
roamed around through the hotel, entering
any room where he thought there would be
nothing for him TO do but to get right out
again.
So, while I was working my way up
through a heavily starched shirt one day and
could not zee anything, while / was wildly
clutching at the empty air, there was a
soft football on the threshold and the door
opened.
knew instinctively that it was the cham
bermaid though could not see her.
Ishrieke two times and tried to conceal
myself in q counterpane, but my arms were
pinioned by the shirt and the counterpane
was a good deal emaciated- Il was not the
counterpane that it had been before tho war.
But the reader has already discovered that 1t
was only Isaac who had strolled in to see if
there might not be something that he could
refrain from doing.
1t has been said that the south has never
fully paid for the awful crime Of human
slavery. but few enfranchised foes OF
utility and animated champions Of eternal
4 Ia IGaa Na n N n "a
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12
we should saw nothing but good Of th. ae.a

we should say nothing but good Of the dead,
but am here TO say that the railroad that
knocked my spine loose last week, and com
PEELED ME to larry lunch baskets and large
Norman 2-year-old griIsacEs through the
cleaning, till my arms hung down To the
ground, does not deserve 10 be treated well,
even after death.
do not feel any antipathy toward the
south, for did not take any part in the war,
remaining in Canada during the whole time,
so that could not be accused now Of often
sive partisanship. ] have always avoided
anything that would look like settled CON
viction in any OF these matters, retaining
always fair, bipartisan and neutral idIocy
in relation to all national affairs
To further illustrate how fair minded am
in these matters, have patiently read ali the
war articles written by both sides, and
have not tried to dodge the foot notes on the
marginal references, or the war maps Of the
memoranda. | have read all these things
until don't know who was victorious, and If
that is not fair and impartial way to look
at the war, don't know how TO proceed In
order to eradicate my prejudices.-Bin Nye
in Boston Globe.
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12

1t Is very common now in the primary
schools for teachers to entertain their little
scholars with stories. A few days ago one Of
the teachers in a school not far from st. Paul
was telling the children about Pharaoh's
daughter finding the babe in the bullrushes.
"Now, children" said she, "how many Of you
know anything about Moses'" Only one
hand went up. That's right, Jimmie; I'm
glad to see there's one in the school who has
heard of hiIu before Now who was MosesF
Hes the fellcr wot they wanted to know
where he was when the light went out eI-
claimed Jimmie with great gusto That
ended the Bible lesson for the day.-St Paul
Herald
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12

sruvE the Little Nam
moth parlor stove, and is said TO draw well
under ali kinds OF circumstances. 1t is not a
large stove, crowdiug out the piano and
other necessary furniture.
Il is cIinker built with bow facer and in
Interchangeable crown sheet All its works
are rel and admired by English speaking
people sverywh.re
This picture is made just as the Little Nam
moth stove has removed its coat and is in the
act Of heating large room. 1t is Q view
from the nigh side
When / asked the landlord what my bill
was he said it was S. But said /, with
great difficulty restraining myself from
tmearing his brains all over the hotel register,
-you have charged me 81 for extras. / have
had no extras"
by the beard Of the prophet!7 said he,
crossing himself and reaching under counter
for a thick set carbine, with which it had
been his won't to shoot large apertures into
the vitals Of people who disagreed with him
by the heard of the prophet" said he, cock
ing the piece after putting in q new half
pound cartridge with tallow on it, you for
get that you have had fire in your room
As looked along down the cold and re-
pulsive length Of the carbine / thought to
myself how many valued friendships we
throw away along life's pathway by reason
OF our haste aid our rash, impetuous ternPers.
Here was a man, striving in his poor, weak
way to keep hOstelry, such as it was He
desired TO be the friend Of one and all, but on
every hand he was repulsed, rebuffed and
walked upon of men.
resolved 10 make him nv friend Catch
Ing him IN nv great strong arms and strain
ing him TO my atrophied breast in such
manner as TO throw the muzzle Of the gun
over my shoulder, l fell on his neck and wept
while be made his own change out Of what
funds lie found in my clothing.
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12
UNCLE GAeE AT THE PARTY.

De twnngin' oh de banjo an
DE srrapiu' oh lie fiddle;
TAX my arm. Mis- Dinah. an
Wen sashay down de middle.
Dinah's jis as fin gal as eber you did see,
rse sumpin' ole, Mis- Dinah, wild twitchin' in de
knee,
But keep a-gOin'!
Swing va partners gcn'lemea,
An don't va stop 10 t'nk
Run aroun, Mis- Dinah, lk'
De turkey fore de mink;
CAESARS aftah Dinah, an e tryin 10 ketch her
shO';
I'd keep up wild EN- bettah, but all 80 peert no
mo-,
But keep a-goin'!
Pears 10 me de danCiu am
A-gttin' mighta fas';
Dinah's skitn up de front,
An | is mos de las.
Gosh! ole nigga, hurry up, deyn leah va 'wsy
benin:
An dere's dat CFSar GRIMM lik' his teet was
melOnrin'.
But keep -goln'
De yaller moons shnn on
Old Farnah TGylahs patch;
Wait until we'se gwine hOm',
Wen take lcrtlc snatch.
Desc awful red desc awful green, de seeds is black
as Satan;
Jis' jump aroun' heah chillern, fur de watermel-
ons watin'!
Ur! he. he
-Duvva Morgan Smith in Century.
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12
Some Embarrassed People.

He camS to me in the car as We we're jog
ging along over the Eric, and without any
preliminary palaver about the weather or the
crops or the Bulgarian situation, he asked:
"Do YOU see that couple on the rightr
@Yes."
Purity good looking woman, and got on
some Mise togs amt shei"
Yes"
What do y,M think of the manT'
"Oh. he seems to be sensible sort Of man
probably villager or farmer
"Yes; he lives back here in small town,
and he's purity good fellow
Then you know him"
"well, kinder Say, I'm in a sort of box
and want a little advice. That woman used
to be my wife We were divorced about
year ago. and she's now married to hirl and
they are on ther bridal tower, or too-er. or
whatever you call it. I'm kinder embarrassed
to know just what policy TO pursue, but you
can see the case from a neutral standpoint.
Now, then, shall / knock his head off, treat
em with cold contempt, or SO over and wish
em much joyT
what were the grounds for divorcer
ave fit too much. wanted to be boss,
and so did she. She'll either boss that chap
or break his neck"
"Do they know you are herer'
"Oh, yes, and s'pose they are kinder en-
barrassed, too 1t seems case uhers some
proceedings ought to be taken"
"A row won't help you any"
NO, s'pose not, but if | could git Mary
mad you'd hear some Of the biggest splitting
and jawing which ever fell on mortal ears.
Say, she's opened on me at 5 o'clock in the
afternoon and kept it up until midnight with
out stopping over three times for breath.
Such command Of language you never saw" !"
Silent contempt would lie a wise policy
Not in this case. See how pert and proud
she sits up there. She does that to brag over
me. She wants TO give me to understand
that wasn't the only husband she could git
II | treat EN- with silent contempt, how Is
she TO find out that Pm now on my way to
marry the Widder Belden, who brings me a
humping blg farm and 5000 in cashf l
want Mary to know that. The day she left
me she said | was too pizen mean to marry
the fat woman in a side show, and want her
to know that l was engaged to a staving
looking woman in less than six weeks |
thihk I'll 60 over and have talk with EN-"
well, don't paiSe any row."
"0h, | shant unless the feller begins to
bluSter around"
He went up the aisle to the water cooler,
and changed my seat to the one behind the
~-'vie- When the man ssuas hass hs stnsss<
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12
A NOVEMBER mIscoNcePTIoN.

Some subtle odOr's on thee, pet,
That's raviShei me for hours;
It's sweeter than the fablrd balm
Culled from a thousand flowers
It's fragrance charms my cy'ry sense;
What is the perfume pray"
Thus spake taf suitOr to his love,
While riding out one day
The damsal-as il turned to stone,
StiT in the buggy sat:
Next. in Mysteries, lmbered up,
And told the blund ring Hat,
THAT smell comes from my cloak, you fooli
Since way last spring, the cloths
Been in tarrcd paper rolled till now,
To CirCumvent the moths"
JEFF. Joslyn-
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12

have recently taken quite a railway trip
into the south in search Of my health
called my physicians together, and they de-
cided by q rising vote that ought to go to
warmer cline, or would enjoy very poor
health all winter. So decided TO go In
search Of my health, IL died on the trail
bought tickets at Cincinnati Of pale,
sallow liar, who is just beginning TO work bis
way up TO the forty ninth degree in the Order
Of Ananias He will surely be heard from
again some day, as he has the elements that
20 to make up a successful liar.
He said that could go through from Gin
cinnati TO Asheville, n. c., only one easy
change Of cars, and in about twenty three
hours. 1t took me twice that, and had to
change cars three times in the dead Of night
The southern railroad Is not In . nourish-
Ing condition Is ought to 60 somewhere for
In health Anyway, it ought TO 60 some
whsrs, which ct present 1t dos not 40
esrdtns 10 he "a Lain Iurovrh ura1nrss
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12

what is the matter with my little wifsf
Her dainty head falls ON his shoulder, and,
between the sobs that shake her slight frame,
she says:
"Wi-Will, fe-feel 30 b-a-ad. wanted to- to
make some bi-bi-biscuit this noon, "A and got
tho wa-wa, water and salt and ye-ye-yeast,
but there's something mi-mi-missing, and
can't think wha- wha what il il
Mr.. Youngman smiled quietly, and, clasp
ing his wife to his watch pocket, be placed his
lips to her ear and whispered: Flour. st
Paul Globe
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12
The Sober Second Thought Prevail

The Sober Second Thought Prevailed.
"If you don't get out of this alley you'll
hear from meT shouted q Spencer street
woman to a couple OF boys who were pound
ing on the fence.
"HOw" queried one.
"I'll call for policemanl"
You will, ehi II you are the kind Of .
woman that wants TO see two or three police
men hammered to death by two desperate
boys, who will never be taken alive, blow
your whistle! We wash our hands Of all
responsibility"
The sober second though. seemed TO pre-
vail with her, as she retired and left them
masters of the field--Detroit Free Press
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12
why sarah Bcrnhard. sausaIed.

That was great mistake Sarah
Bernhardt's manager made few nights ago.
He had left his umbrella in a corner back Of
the scenes. When the performance was over
he went to pick it up, but instead picked up
Sarah, who CHANGED to bs standing there. and
was about 10 run off with her when she
squealed Let go of me" in French.-Ken-
tucky State Journal
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12
Put to Good Use.

I've been hunting all over the room for
hairpin, said a young lady TO her newly
married friend, "and couldn't find a single
one to save me-"
"Of course you couldn't, my dear" was the
sympathetic reply. I'm married now, you
know"
"And what has that 10 do with itr wa, tbs
incredulous query.
Everything, my dear" was the reply.
My husband strsightens them all out for
pipe nersr-The Judge
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12
THE WHOLE STORY.

A certain physician, who called his wife Mrs"
Was by her, from custom, called DIR"
II pleased, he would greet her wish coniugsl Krs,
But If cross, in the cupboard he Lr.
Thereupon by advice Of her brother, the Col.
She altered the DR.. to Mr.,
Till at length $50 it's told in this page Of this Jol
Once more in good humOr he Kr
Lowell Courier.
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12

First Pastor-YOu have paid choir, be-
Level
Second Ditto-Yes, and a very good one.
First Pastor-I don't believe in them It
is wrong in principle and Is an extravaganza
. church should not sanction
Second Ditto-That's what 1 thought, my
dear brother, but it got so in my church that
we were compelled either to pay the people TO
stay and listen to a volunteer choir or pay .
choir to sing. so on the score Of economy we
concluded 10 hire a choir instead of . congre-
CATION Washington Critic.
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12

A good memory is no evidence Of superior
intelligence.
Those who have great deal to say, say it
In few words.
We cannot spare any of the passions, for
what are the virtues but the passions subduedi
All simple people are not great, but all
great people are simple.
believe in the Immortality of the soul, not
because | can prove it, but because can't
Century Magazine.
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12
TWO OF A KIND"

man went up the aisle a seat 70 find, .
Cnknowing that a dog cam. on behind.
The usher stopped him, saying: Sir, fear
You do not know dogs are not welcomed here -
The man turned round, the friendly dog espied
He don't belong To me, sir, he replied.
" But, sir, he followed you withou a doubt"
And SO did vou.'' The dog was hustled out
It'd Bits
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12

Miss EudoXie Hedouin, patient in Paris
hospital, has sleeping spells She has just
walked up from a nap Of eighteen days
length How she became afflicted with this
disease is not stated, but it is supposed she
contracted the habit while acting as clerk in
the store of man who did not advertise
It'd Bits
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12

was once minded OF the Gttleness Of in
tellectual man by a London policeman,
whom l had timidly approached with the
polite but earnest inquiry:
BEG pardon, officer, but might l ask why,
in London, everything goes TO to the leftr"
Like one of Mrs Jarley's" figures, his
head moved statelily. He regarded me one
awful, official moment with contemptuou.
pity. His head moved back again. Then
with withering scorn he answered:
~An' wy in ell shouldn't it!"
had never thought Of that-Detroit Free
Press.
Springfield globe-republic. (Springfield, Ohio) 1884-1887, 1886-12-12

drawing is crude,
Of course, for ! am
not a fluent drawer
and l am making
this sketch entirely
from memory. 1t
is supposed to have
been made while
near to the stove,
or at least as near
as l could get with
out soaring itaway.
This stove is called