Smyrna times., 1886-11-03
A Watermelon Story.
HOW JOHN GOT THE BULGE ON BILL
AND THEN AGAIN HOW HE
DIDN'T.

AND THEN AGAIN HOW HE
DIDN'T.
My father was the finest watermelon
grower in the country. Melon culture
was his delight. particularly remem-
Der one crop. Just before the melons
began to get ripe my father called
Black Bill and me and said: Il want
you boys to understand one thing. If
one of my melons is stolen I am going
to measure the trecks that l find in the
patch and then measure feet, and the
owner of the feet that correspond with
the tracks shall get a whipping that he
can never forget. See this hickory?"
pointing to a long and cruel-looking
switch which he had placed above the
dining groom door. Well, if either of
you want to catch this switch, pitch
in" Bill shook his head and muttered
that he didn't want it that he would
rather be killed by steer lOld Buck
few weeks before had thrown Bill
against a tree and knocked off the
bark than to be cut to pieces with such
a switch and l assured my stern par
ent that so far as | was concerned he
might rest in peace. Bill was the only
negro we had, and although he was
! compelled to 90 to church every Sun
! day, riding on the seat behind the
! buggy, and although he sat in the
! buggy during services, and without
/ effort could hear every word of the
sermon, yet that boy with all his care
| full training was inclined to be a thief.
The next day after the proclamation
was issued l went out and looked at
the melon patch. There, lying in the
sun, striped and tempting, Law "A beau
tiful melon. All, if there We're any
| thing that could make southern bov
forget honor it was u watermelon.
! trembed, for | knew | could not pre-
/ vent myself from stealing it, and then
| that awful switch came up before me.
/ An idea struck me. | went to the
house, stole into the cabin and got
/ Bills shoes. What an enormous foot
! the rascal had The shoes were so
large that they would not stay on my
| feet. but / Overcame this drawback by
| stuifing them with grass. I slipped
/ around and entered the patch from il
/ locust thicket 4 rain had fallen the
/ day before and l made decided tracks
in the level ground. got the melon,
| stole back to the thicket, and, although
/ it was not ripe, l ate more than half of
/ it. Then / returned Bills shoes. That
afternoon, while Bill and 7 were in the
yard, Isaw my father carefully carrying
/ a small stick, enter the gate. His face
wore an unusually stern expression
and ] saw that there was something
/ wrong.
| don't think that much measuring
i is needed OH this OCCASION" said he,
/ glancing at the stick. Bill, where
are your shoes ?"
" In de cabin, sab"
Bring them here"
He brought the shoes. The old gen
tleman applied the measure and said:
Fresh dirt on them, I see"
Bill's face became a study. "Doan
/ know how how it come on dar, mars
ter Amt wore 'em sense last Sun
day"
g" Yes, that's all right, John" turn
! ing to me, fetch me that switch" :"
Ny heart smote me, but brought the
switch. Then Bill began to dance.
never did see fellow get himself into
SO many different shapes, and it seem
ed that every shape was better suited
to the switch. | had to snort. |
couldn't help it. l kept out of Bills
way as much as possible, for he seemed
to look reproachfully at me, but he did
no accuse me of delivering him up to
the enemy, and l had begun to per-
suade myself that Bill had stolen the
melon, when two days later l came to
grief. Bill and / were again in the
yard when my father entered the gate.
carrying a small stick john" said
he as he approached, where are your
shoes?"
" In the house, sir"
Bring them here"
got my shoes. Great Caesar! there
was fresh soil on them. Come on,
come on" said the old gentleman. l
handed him one shoe and dropped the
other one. BILL" said he, after
measuring the shoe, bring me that
switch" Bill bounded with delight
and brought the switch.
Pap" l cried, "please don't whip
me; l amt done nothin oh
l danced, capered and l met the
switch at every turn. In my agony
caught sight Of Bill standing at the
corner of the house and snorting like a
( glandcred horse. Bill kept out of nv
way, but that evening l met him and
asked:
Bill, how did you wear my shoes ?"
How did per war mine? ?"
" Put grass in 'em."
Wall, 1 tuck er par er short stills
an put yer shoes on de ends O. EN-.
Reckon we'se erbout even now. Oh, I
tell yer whut's er fack, John, it don't
do ter fool wild me, case Use one o. de
'n'ited by de saints"