davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05
Starting o Church Fund.

A gentleman from Dakota tells US
how the fund was started for building
the first Methodist church erected IN
Bismarck. The town was young, and
was practically in possession Of the
gamblers. Faro banks and all sdfts Of
gambling schemes were run openly and
establishment was situated n q huge
tent near the centre of the town, and
thither went the Rev. Mr.. Bull, who
had cone to Bismarck to establish
Methodist church. Mounting a poker
table in the middle OF the thickly-
crowded tent, Mr.. Bull proceeded to
speak for Christ. At once the busy
gamblers laid down their chips ard
turned to jeering the preacher, some OF
them even pelting him with Whatever
came easiest to hand.
Presently the slender form OF Dennis
Hannifan, the boss gambler and feather,
weight champion of the place, arose and
moved toward the preacher. -,
"Hold on, boys" said Dennis; this
is no way to treat stranger. l know
a thing worth two of this" At this
Dennis took off his hat and passed it
around among the gamblers, who each
put in a chip. After taking up this
strange collection, Dennis walked up to
the table, dumped the hat of chips upon
it, and said =,
"There you are, stranger, that's fol
YOU"
" But" said the clergyman, "what
am to do with it2'
Well" replied Dennis, "it's you 8.
and you can do what you please with 1t.
You can cash it or buck it, just as you
like"
"Buck It'll" said the holy man, ''what
is that2"
"Why, play it in, you know; bet it
on one of the games"
Mr.. Bull preferred to "cash the chips
in" so he went to the proprietor OF tht
| place, got SAT for the chips, and with
that sum began the fund which finally
| built the Methodist church in which
flourishing society now worships.-
Chicago Neaos.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05
Senator Aldrich and Chaplain Butler.

A good story is told in Washington
. on Senator Aldrich of Rhode Island. A
Sfewsexeninqs ago he was standing in the
hallway of his residence, waiting for his
wife to come down stairs and accompany
him to the theatre 1t was about ten
minutes to 8 o'clock, and the Senator
was anxious to be off. The door bell
rang while he waited, and he imme-
diately went to the door and opened it,
A benevolent looking gentleman was
standing outside in the darkness of the
vestibule with his card in his hand He
thrust the card at the Senator, who took
it but did not look at it.
''Come in," said the Senator, rather
testify, thinking it an officeseeker or an
unwelcome constituent.
The gentleman entered, and Senator
Aidrich motioned him to chair in the
hall.
''Well, my man, what can | do for
you / am in hurry, for | am Just 60
ing to the theatre, but l expect l can
spare You a few minutes" was the
Rhode Island Senator's salutation.
The gentleman looked. up rather sur
pTised, and remarked: II am the Rev.
Mr.. Butler, chaplain of the Senate.
have never had a chance to call on
you yet, so l thought | would come
around tonight; but see you are going
out. and will not detain YOU" and be-
fore the Senator could recover from the
shock the chaplain had disappeared out
the door, which had been left omen
When Mrs. Aldrich came d wn stairs
she found her husband still in a dazed
condition, lingering the chaplain's card.
Senator Aldrich now says he will never
open the door again when the bell
rings.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05
SAM JONES' WAY TO HEAVEN.
A Few More Characteristic Expressions of
Opinion by the Erratic Evangelist.

Rev. Sam P. Jones lectured in Chau-
tauqua, n. Y. to an audience of six
thousand persons. His subject was
Chow to be Saved"
Before commencing his lecture Mr..
Jones said:
l have my way of doing things and
my way of saying things. Some people
like what l say, but none the way l say
it. God bless you! That's the only
thing in this world I've got a patent
right on. l am not candidate for pub
lie favor in any sense. l have been
warned that 1 would injure my popular
ity if l didn't modify my speech. But
if that's the case will keep it up. I'm
too popular now. They are working
me to death, and keeping me away from
my home and family. | want to saw
Pm no cowboy. God never made a
purer woman than my mother, nor a no
bier man than my father Many people
question my color, and write to ask ii |
am black or white. | always answer
"colored." Yellow buff is my color. I've
no apology to make for what | say, for
I'm not seeking popularity. am not
joker or a fraud. love God and Gods
work.
Coming to his text, in course of his
discourse, Mr.. Jones made use of the
following Characteristic expressions:
There is but one road of humanity in
the moral universe. He'll is at one
end of the road and heaven is at the
other.
Now it's not what sort of a fellow
you are, but which way you are headed.
If your back is turned against holiness
you're going to hell.
Some of your people are Christians.
Perhaps nine-tenths of you belong to
church, but I've found that don't mean
much.
The meanest man / ever knew
was q church member, and the best
man that l ever knew was a church
member.
| Peter converted three thousand per
sons in an hour, yet there are old croak
ing church members and dried up old
ministers that don't believe it. | be-
lieve I've seen five hundred CONVEX
tions in single night, and believe !
will live to see fifty thousand people
converted under my own humble minis
try in twelve months time.
If Peter saved three thousand souls
in an hour why, In this enlightened
nineteenth century, cannot nation be
born in a day2
1t is time we threw away our little
iron hooks and threw out seines into
the river of the world and eaten fish fol
God.
To-day there are ten children born to
parents in America where one soul is
| born to Christ.
We want to save souls and preach
| Christ and not sectarianism.
| am Methodist, but l am no more
to blame for being Methodist than fol
being Jones.
Some of these Methodist preach
ers are talking about infant baptism,
while all the grown people are going to
hell
The Baptists cry for water, and the
half of them are going where they can
not get drop.
In this nineteenth century it is time
to stop this kind of foOlishness and
preach the doctrines of Christianity. II
is time to tell the world through the
churches that Christ died for sinners.
God help us to see the true way, and
we all can be saved.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05
Editors on Horseback.
HOW THE SCOUTS RODE UP CLOSE TO
KEEP THEM FROM FALLING OFF IN
MONTANA,

One or two of the newspaper men
who went up into Montana to write up
Gaul's version of the battle of the Little
Big Horn, at which, ten years ago, Gen
eral Custer and his entire command
were killed, were not the most expert
riders in the world, even when in prac-
tice, and had not been on horse for
many years. They did not feel perfect
lv at home in the saddle. In fact they
felt just about as awkward as they
looked. The 200 members of the party
were obliged to 90 from Fort Custer
and over the battle field on horses.
The newspaper men were close up to
Chief Gaul as the latter rode over the
battle ground and pointed out where
the Indians and Clusters command were
first located, in fact narrated his version
of the great massacre. The journalistic
riders were not alone. They were at
tended by orderles from the fort, who
followed very close behind them
II wonder" said one of the news
paper men, "why those soldiers stick
50 close to US ~
ga courtesy 70 the press, " replied a
second.
Nothing of the kind, gentlemen, " re-
marked an old army officer. eve are
afraid you might fall off, and directed
the orderlies to watch closely, so as to
prevent such an accident. st. Paul
Globe
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05
A Needed Rest.

"What you want" said physician to
n Dakota editor who came to consult
him, sis absolute rest mentally and
more physical exercise for few
months
'Mustn't think at all?'
mo, sir"
"And take all the outdoor exercise
possible"
g hats it exactly"
"But how am 1 going to get my liv-
ing?'
Washington and start such correspon-
dence bureau as you have been gettino
letters from for the last year WritinS
the letters will give your mind Just the
rest it needs, while lodging your board
bill will bring the exercise. -Estelliue
Bell.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05
Another Earth,

Mars is almost universally accepted as
being kind of a duplicate earth. 1t is
endowed with land, water, clouds, and
air, and snow accumulating around its
poles in their respective winter seasons.
The atmosphere of the planet, is, how
ever, obviously much more rare than
that OF the earth, so that it only exerts
at the planets surface a pressure of
about tV pounds and quarter to the
square inch. The climate of Mars is
conceived, from the small amount of
snow which accumulates at the po.es Of
the planet, to be comparatively mild
The water is distributed into a very
curious series of long parallel canals
which run out from the ocean basins to
an extent in some places of three and
four thousand miles Two moons have
been discovered since 1877, presenting
a diameter of not more than six or seven
miles, and one of them completing a
revolution round the planet in little
more than seven hours. -Edinburgh Re
UietO.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05

WILLIAM EVANS, a Columbus, Ohio,
pugilist, struck Miss Lou Sanders, and
when arrested said he guessed he was
guilty. You guess you are guiltyf'
said the Mayor. You're coward and
a brute, and I'm going to give you the
full penalty" The Mayor was much
disappointed to find that he could inn
pose only $40 fine and ten days i'm
prisonment. He gave him that, and
said: "You'Il serve this out, as no in
luence on earth can secure your release,
and when you get out you've got to
leave the city,"
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05
Caught in a Lie.

In some Texas hotels the partition
walls are so thin that the conversation
in one room 'can be heard IN the
next. Two friends from the interior
put up at Galveston hotel and were
given one room. The man in the next
room overheard the following converse
ton about daybreak next morning:
Il say, Bill, are you awake" .
GIVE been wide awake for the last
two hours"
'Tend me So"
'T've dozed off again"
II knew you were lying when yon
said YOU were wide awake. "-TeraS
Sftings.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05

seventy miles as the crow flies from
Alpena. The gentlemen who first dis
covered him were Henry G. Beeson and
George Hackett, both of whom attest
the finding of Evers in an insensible
condition lying beside the huge kite.
He was badly bruised and could not
speak for several hours after being re-
stored to consciousness. They nnrsed
him and then agreed to accompany hltn
to his home, which they did. Evers in
his terrible journey crossed seven rivers
and two ranges of the Allegheny Noun
tains. He was suspended in the air at
least seven hours.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05

CAVALRY regiments in the Prussian
army are being carefully drilled in the
art of swimming their horses across riv-
ers At the word ''dismount!" the sol
diers divest themselves of their clothing,
which, with their weapons, &c, is
placed upon raft, which is swiftly
ferried across the river, while the men
take the horses by the head with one
hand and swim with the other The
feat is said to be performed with the
utmost precision and rapidity. whole
regiments crossing and recrossing in an
astonishing short time.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05
ALASKA INDIANS.
How tho Original Settler of Our New Ter
riTory Enjoy Themselves.

Clumsy squaws were squatting in rows
along shore as we lounged about the
village; hideous bucks-I trust they
were not framed in he image of their
Maker-ill-shapen lads, dumpy, ex-
pressionless babies, G een-compleXioned
half breeds, sat and looked on with
utter indifference. Many of the Haida
Indians have kinky or wavy hair, Jap
anese or Chinese eyes, and most of them
toe out; but they are, all things con.
sidered, the least interesting, the most
ungainly and the most unpicturesque
of people. If there is work for them to
do they do it, quite needless the
presence of inquisitive pale aced spec
tators. Indeed, they seem to look down
upon the white man, and perhaps they
have good reasons for doing so. If there
is no work to be done they are not in
the least sconcerted. very much
doubt if a Haida Indian, or any other
Indian for that matter, knows what it is
to be bored or to find the time hanging
heavily on his hands. | took note of
one old buck who sat for four solid hours
without once changing his position. He
might have been slit ng there still but
that his squaw TO ted MIN out after a
lively monologue, to which he was an
apparen ly disinteres ed listener. At
last he arose with grunt, ad justed his
bla ket, strobe grimly to his canoe and
baIled it out; then he entered and
padded leisurely to the shore, where he
disappeared in the crest. Filth was
everywhere and evil odors. but far, far
alOft the eagles were soaring, and the
branches of a wlthered tree near the set
Element were filled with crows as big as
buzzards. Once in awhile some one or
another took a shot at them-and
missed. Thus the time passed at
Cara an. One magnities the nearest
episode on the Alaskan voyage and is
grateful for it. Killisnoo is situated n
cosy little owe. 1t is rambling vii.
lage that climbs over the rocks and mar
rowly escapes being pretty, but it
manages to escape. Most of the lodges
are built of logs, ave small, square
windows, with glass n them and cur
tains, and have also kind of primitive
chimney. We climbed among these
lodges and found them quite desc tie l.
The dodgers were all down at the dock.
| There were inscriptions on a few of the
! quest observe the sacredness of the
! domestic hearth. This we were careful
to do, but inasmuch as each house was
set in order and the widow cur aims
carefully ooped ba k, we were no doubt
welcome to a Gimp e of an Alaskan in
terror. 1t was the least little bit like a
peep show and didn't seem quite real
One inscription was IS follows-it was
over the door of the lodge of the
! laureate:
| JOSEPH HooLQUN.
My tum-tum is white,
try to do right;
All are welcome to come
To my hearth and my home.
! So call in and see me, white red or black man,
I'm the debate hyas of the Kootznahoo guam
Need add that tun1-tun1 in the Chi
nook jargon signifed the soul Joseph
merely announced that he was clean
soued: likewis, debate hyas, that is,
above reproach.-San Francisco Chro7el-
! elr
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05
We Appeal to Experience


For long time we steadily refused to pub
fish testimonials, believing that, in the opinion
of the public generally, the great majority
were manufactured to order by unprincipled
parties as a means of disposing of their worth
less preparations.
That this view of the case is to a certain ex.
tent true there can be no doubt.
At last, several years ago, we came to the
conclusion that every intelligent person can
readily discriminate between spurious and
bona fide testimonials, and determined to use
as advertisements q few Of the many hun.
dreds of unsolicited certificates In our posses.
sion.
In doing this, we published them as nearly "a
possible in the exact language used by our cor
respondents, only changing the phraseOlogy, in
some cases, so as to compress them into a
smaller space than they would otherwise
occupy, but without in the least exaggeratine
Or destroying the meaning of the writer's.
We are glad to say that our final conclusion
was correct one-that letter recommend
Ing an article having true merit finds favor
with the people.
The original Of every testimonial published
by us is on file in our office, an inspection OF
which will prove to the most gkeptical that our
assertion made above, that only the facts are
given as they appear therein, is true.
But as it would be very inconvenient, II not
impossible, for all of our friends to call on US
Tor that purpose, we invite those who doubt III
there be suCh), to correspond with any of the
parties whose names are signed to our testi.
monials, and ask them if we have made any
mlsstatements, so far as their knowledge ex-
lends, IN this article. In other words, If we
have not published their letters as nearly yer.
batim as possible.
Very respectfully,
E. T. HAZELTINE
Proprietor Piso's Cure for Consumption
and Piso's Remedy for Catarrh
We append a recent letter, which came to us
entirely unsolicited, with permission to pub.
lish it:
DAYTON, Ohio, Jan. H. 1885,
You may add my testimony as to the inertia
OF Plsos Cure for Consumption. I took a
severe cold last February, which settled on my
lungs. They became liberated and were so
painful that had no rest for two days and
nights: got a bottle of Pisos Cure for Com
sumption, and was relieved by the time had
taken half of 1t. Since that time have kept
Plsos Cure in the house, and use it as a pre-
Ventive, both for lung troubles and Group for
which can recommend it as the best medi-
cine ever used; and that is saying great deal
Tor have used at least twenty others, besides
about as many physicians prescriptions.
Plsos Cure for Consumption has never failed
to give reliefin my family.
j. GRUBB,
81 Springfield st.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05

For DYSPEPSIA, INDIGESTION, depression OF
spirits, general debility in their various forms
also as preventive against fever and ague and
other Intermittent fevers, the "Ferro- Phosphor-
ated Elixir Of Calisaya," made by CasweH Haz-
q; ara g 90, New York and sold by all Druggists,
from fever or of her sicLness II IL. NJ, a.,.ai
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05

Amer clns are constantly informed that
there a:e millions in the Bank OF England
English ancestors can secur, a few millions
of this mo ley, by simply sending a shilling or
two to B .ank 81 Co., London. There are mill
lions in this country, too, for Englishmen, if
tn ely will come over and work for it.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05

PRESIDENT DWIGHT of Yale has
scholarly stoop, and this is why little
New Haven girl, quite innocent at an
attempt at pun, said " Mama, |
think he is the stoopedest man l ever did
see,"
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05

A leading citizen Of Hagerstown, Nd MT.
George w. Harris, had suffered for some time
with facial neuralgia and toothache, when he
tried St. Jacobs Oil, He says: 1T gave me
instantaneous relief, and consider 1t won
-P,,l olxrl
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05
u. t. HAIELTINE
Proprietor Piso'ss Cure for Consumption
A. J. GRUBB,
81 Springfield st.

The jewel of servant & RI is the one who
hangs all her mistress embroidered under
wear on the portion of the line most conspic-
uous to the neighbors' eyes. In politics the
party organ does very much the same sort of
service tor The party,
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05

If Noah was a consistent Jew what made
him take Ham into the Ark?
You will get more comfort for 25cts. In
Gle Inv
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05

If you have Cold, Cough, (dry-hacking)
Group. Cankered- throat, Catarrh Dropping
causing cough--Dr Kilmer's Indian Cough Cure
Consumption OtD will relieve instantly-heals
and cures. Price &c, SOC and 81.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05

'Did you go fishing when you were
in the country last week2" asked Pod
snap of Fangle ''No; couldn't get any
bait, )" was the reply. "Why, that was
singular; how was that 2" Happened
to strike local option neighb orhood. :"
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05

DR.. Pierce's "Favorlte prescription" IS not
extolled as a "cure-all" but admirably full
fills singleness of purpose. being a most po-
tent specific in those chronic weaknesses pc
culiar to women.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05
No trouble to swallow DR.. Pisrce,s nellst.

A Chicago cloak factory only pays IA cts.
per day to its emp Dyes. This Sc ems wretched
but probably they were wretch ed seams.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05
An Exacting Customer.

Customer-'I say, Mr.. Barber, I
don hear your scissors at work on my
hair"
Barber There is very little hair on
your head"
customer -''That makes no differ
ence. l pay my money and I want you
Y rattle the scissors on the bald place
just the same as if it had hair ON it.n
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05

FIFTEEN YEARS ago man quit Berlin,
Canada, owing dollar board bill.
The other day he returned, found that
his creditor was dead, hunted up his
family, and paid the debt with interest.
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05

Prof. Chas P. Williams, Phi. D., of Philadel-
phia says there is neither morphia, opium nor
minerals in Red Star Cough Cure. Price,
twenty-five cents bottle. =
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05
Heurv,sCarboIi. S,Iu

Inc best salve used in the world for Cuts Bruises
Files, Sores, Ulcers, Salt Rheum, letter, Chapped
Hands Chnblains Corns and all kinds of Skin Erup-
uons FrecEles and Pimples. The salve guaranteed
to give perfect satisfaction in every case Pc ,ur.
you get HENRY's CARBoLGc SALvE as all others are
but limitations and connterfeits
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05

The tain of scroula in the blood should be got M
Of or serious consequences may result Consump-
tion is undoubtedly scrofua Of the lungs, and In lts
early STAGES may be cured by purifying the blooo
and buiIaIng up the system. For this Hoods sarsa~
parilIa is uneorsIed. 1t also cures scrofula when
appears in the form OF running Sores boiS Dunches
In the neck catarrh or in any othor manner. Wmio
IL purinss Hoods sarsaparlna also vitauzes ana en-
riches the blood.
'Ihays been taking Hoods sarsaparilla Tor ABOUT
three months Before that my blood was In terri
NJ. condition SSter using It for about one month
nv appetite was setter and my general neai IN
greatly improved For medicine as good as ho'dS
sarsapGrilla too much cannot be SAID - L.
Bugbee House, Putnam, CT. ,
al have been troubled with scrofu "a TOT tree yeIs'
having running sores on my leg. Af'er taxing ono
bottl~ Of Hoods sGrsaparila am setti.'s WA 10y
idIy."-AsA EIBEL. South Bend, Ind.
Hoods SaYSapariGla 1
Bold by all druggists 81; six for IS. Prepared only
by y. J. MOOD CO.. Apothecariss. Lowell. MAsa.
n@IfoS
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05

Doesn't music run contrary to law when
there are minors in its bars
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05

When youngster is stalled in photography
he may be SAID to lie spell-bound
News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1886-08-05
,ux.I,.., ua,sI and surgical Institute.

New York consumers ha ,e cH 8nPP he deal
bitterly Of the high price of ice 'a es nf their
ers have kindly reduced the wasSS " 'N'-'