davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-10-01
HUMOROUS.

There are some men so violently
opposed to capital punishment thai
they won't hang wall paper. They lei
their wives do it. Texas Siftings.
He Was a Careful Man. Mariner
=" Sail, sir; nice breeze on now, sir. .
Mr.. Isaacs-" Vot! After dinner as
cost me three-an-thixpenth? Not me. u
Funny Folks.
Some one asks: What has be.
come of the daisy?'' Briefly, she has
gone back to the city, and is staying
in the house waiting for her freckleS
to disappear. -Nea0 Hagen News.
The Able List, one of the great.
est pianists the world ever produced,
died poor. There are a good many
people in this country who seem likely
to die poor pianists. = Springfield
Union.
"A man was recently fined five dol
lars in the Denver police court for fast
driving, and man who was run over
by him and made the complaint was
fined the same amount for using pro.
fame language in the encounter.
The Parisians have new idol, 9
beautiful dancer from Tunis, known
as g La Belle Fatma." She has been
adopted as favorite in the absence
of Sara Bernhardt, who was known
as g La Belle Thinma. "-Rumbler.
Would it be considered impolite
to speak of some of the very thin girls
who go in bathing as. swimming
matchesP Perhaps to refer to them
as part of the floating population
would be better.-Boston NeaOs.
Visitor Degrading the bahy) -"Oh
what dear little duck of child! He
resembles you both, indeed he does.
He's got his mothers handsome ewes
and his fathers hair Father (who is
baldheaded)-''I think he must have;
haven't. N 7, telegram.
-'I'll press thee, press thee YET
again." sang the parted-in-the-
middle man at the social the other
night, and all the fellows he had Dor.
rowed from for two years back went
out in the cool for fear he would keer
his word. = Yonabers Statesman.
Old So ldier- ''Quick, doctor! eau.
terize this wound where dog has Just
bitten mer' Doctor 'But, my good
fellow, there is no use in cauterizino
a wooden leg!" Old Soldier-"Weli.
then, burn me on the other leg. I'm
afraid the poison has already left the
wood and passed into my body" y It'd
Bits.
y Capitalist Gust rescued)-F'Well,
Mister, I'm much 'bliged to ye for
hauling me out of the water, an here $
a dollar an forty cents for ye-all the
change I've got about me now" sob,
no; keep your money. 1 wouldn't
think of robbing you. mot tall!
not tall! 'Twould have been lost any,
how if ye hadn't rescued me. "-Hag'-
per's Bazaar.
Their house in the country was
raised few feet from the ground, and
Tommy, To escape well-deseryed
whipping, ran from his mother and
crept under the house. Presently the
father came home, and, hearing where
the boy had taken refuge, crept under
to bring him out. As he approached
on his hands and knees, Tommy asked:
Papa, is she after you too?'-M. 7.
Ledger.
Great Literary Critic ho was it
started the fashion among noted au-
thors of every now and then printing a
novel anonymously?a Great Publisher
TT began in Boston, 1 believe y
''Well, the inventor of that idea ought
to be hung" ''Why, what's the harm ~
Harm! Great Scott! How is critic
to decide what to say about book if
he doesn't know who wrote it?''-
Omaha World.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-10-01
Size of an Atom.

We are reaching down SO low in OBJ
seryation Of the constituents of matter
that some idea of the size of an atom
is within our reach. Sir William
Thomson has recently calculated that
the average size of chemical atom is
not less than six and not greater than
sixty billionths of cubic inch. 1t has
also been calculated that in cubic
inch of air there are three hundred
quintiIlions of atoms Hence the cubic
inch of air is by no means full, and it
is possible for them TO move eighteen
miles a minute and collide against
each other 800. 600 times a second, as
has also been calculated that they do
--far,ea0loategk yQarnaE.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-10-01
TEMPERANCE READING.
A DRINKING MAN.

We N Y not drinking man;
His habit f grows
To an X S, do what he can
Naught can - l. its woes.
IT'S very R D finds to stop.
Though oft he will a:
Then fail and c K whisky shop
His fortunes to L A.
His pocket always NJ It's,
And G D are his clothes;
He can't attend to N E biz"
Red doth II A his nose.
Drink holds him in its I N grip;
Soon ID P gets in sin;
Sure in the n d down viii slip,
Filled with d X within.
Though of no q c often takes
H U of cloves to quell
His breath, and then in D d makes
Those G Q know who SMELL
His friends all have an C way
When for their A d goes,
They can't X Q's his vile display,
And Z not his woes.
In K c has wife to slay
Her heart will A X lot:
The debts he o makes her pay,
And tears her l / will blot.
S X P can't his doom Alright;
Sick ere old A G lies:
The snakes he c z tries to fight
And without dies
H c. Dodge. in Detroit Free Press.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-10-01
Encouraging Statistics.

The reduction in the number of sa
looms in Missouri in the last few years
is phenomenon both encouraging and
interesting. Four years ago, in 1882,
there were 1901 saloons in the State.
paying in licenses an aggregate OF
$547, 900. The number was not large
for population of 2, 100000. Never
theless, in four years it has been re-
duced nearly onc-fourth, the number
on July 4, 1886, being only $500.
Nearly every fourth saloon that existed
in the State four years ago has closed
| up. The $500 now in the State yield
in license fees about 81, 800, 000-nearly
three times as much as the larger num-
Der Welded in 1882. st. Louis has fully
shared in this saloon decrease, and
there are now in this city only 1,6S1
saloons of all kinds-less than half the
number $4,000 in Chicago, and 1,172
fewer than there are in San Francisco
(2,79O. Eighteen counties in the State
have no saloons, the county courts, at
the demand OF the community, refusing
to issue licenses.
When it is reflected that these con-
siderable reductions in the number of
drinking places in four years-400 in
St. Louis City and 300 in the State
have been brought about in the face of
a large growth in the population, it
win. be admitted that they exhibit a
marked improvement in the moral
temper of the people.-St. Louis Be
publican.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-10-01
JOHN THOMPSON,
1873 Broadway, Sterling, Illinois.
ONE-HALT POUND
OLEOMARGARINE,

Every manufacturer of oleomarga-
rine shall place and keep on the end or
side Of the building wherein his bust
ness is carried on, so that it can be
easily seen, his name, business and
number of the factory He must also
keep the necessary books prescribed
by the Commissioner Of Internal Rev
enue, and pack, mark and stamp all
goods manufactured as above
Wholesale dealers are required to
pack, brand and stamp each package
as above, and keep book and make a
monthly return to the collector of the
district, showing the oleomargarine
received by him and from whom re-
ceived also the oleomargarine dis
posed of by them and to whom sold or
delivered.
Retail dealers are required to pack
every pound they sell in wooden or
paper package marked as prescribed
above, and to destroy the stamps on
every package as soon as it is emptied;
to see that every package purchased
by them contains the proper revenue
stamps, caution notices, etc.
On the day when this act goes into
effect, to-wit, October 81. 1886, all
oleomargarine on the premises of any
dealer must be IN wooden packages
containing not less than ten pounds
each, and every dealer must make,
under oath, written inventory Of all
packages on hand October 81, 1886,
and forward the same to the collector
as above, showing the quantity in each
and every package, and he must mark
upon each package as follows:
- Lbs.
Oleomargarne On Hand Oct. ST. 1886.
.o.....
He will also procure and affix to
each and every package the proper
tax-paid stamp, and cancel the same by
marking five lines across the stamp.
The penalties prescribed for the VIC
lation of any of the provisions of this
act are very severe, but there is no
need of giving them here.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-10-01

every attempt at publication and i'm
proyement or failed to fill his pockets
with public money whenever he got a
chance.
There naver has been. in fact. il any
age or country. a trade so distinctly
marked out for legal reprobation and
encouragement as liquor-dealing in the
United States in our time. Whatever
be the merits or dement's of alcoholic
drinks, the man who sells them seems
always prone to become a social nui-
sance, and his shop fountain of evil.
N Y Post.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-10-01
WHAT JACK SAW.
ank and in nlnasnntt niir


Jack and in pleasant Talk,
Hanged one morn a woodland walk,
Leading from our sea-girt town
10 broad, bfeeZe-courted down;
soon, Jack ever restless eye,
Aeen and curious, sought the sky;
fragments of q gale DER blown
Aound the gusty heaven were strewn;
%lnp' Quoth JACK, with sudden glee,
rFatherl did you ever see
6uch nnceuth, fantastic shapes?
HOn clovd-head is like an apes,
Srlnnlng, with his monstrous mouth
Ger those grim pines pointed south;
sAnd above the Jagged rocks
Lhere's mist-formed, willy fox
Running from the wind that sounds
Rearward, like pack OF hounds;
And-why-fGther! don't you spy
That big fellow lifting high
Both his vapory arms to smite
Some one lurking out of sight?
Then, half CT mson. and half dun,
Mark that face of ilnpish fun,
With sun-rGy, red as rose,
on the tip of his huge nose.
Strange, how many shapes there be
Floating round this sky-born sea!
Yes. another! =. watch it sail
Through the swift waves! that's {
whale
Harpooned, too .. beyond doubt . /.
8 How he jets the life-bood out!
While mighty ship behind
Seems to labor down the wind! ..
" Can the heavens be growing clear?
Nay! for other forms appear,
Cuainter, funnier than before!...
What head. all bald and boar,
Mods, in oldest fashion bowed,
Down from yonder glimmering cloud!
Very bald, and very big.
Grandpa's head-lDith0lG his tDig:
And look! lookl hand like Joe's-
our old barber's>, grows and grows
Larger from the circling mist
, Till one views his knotCod fist
Elourishing Il razor thin -
Under grandpa's stubbly chin;
Shaved as neat as any fig,
Ere the barber fits his Wig);
All! but can't | see them plain?
No, can'tl alPs void again!
Grandpa's head and Barber Joe
Melted like the Christmas snow;
Pshaw things get absurdly mixed
~ Nothing's clear, and nothing's fixed;
Say! what makes my sight so dim,
Sky and clouds before it swimY
What? my lad, you've woven enough
Out of fancy's airy stuff:
SO your large creative eyes
lDazel by mOcking phantasies)
Lower from those marvellous skiesv'
Pad II. Hay3le, in Youths Companion.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-10-01

White Cake: White of four eggs,
one-half cup of butter, one cup Of
sugar, two and one-half cups of -four,
one teaspoonful of baking powder. -
The Household.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-10-01

In Massachusetts colony, 1889, law
was enacted forbidding the drinking of
healths for the following reasons de-
clared in the preamble: Because it
was an occupation of much waste of
the good creatures, and of many others
sins, as drunkenness, quarreling, I'M
cleanness, which ought not to be toler-
ated by such as are bound by solemn
covenant to walk by the rule of Gods
word in all their conversation. DR..
Dorchester.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-10-01

AT the General Conference of the
Canada Methodist Church just held at
Toronto it was recommended that the
conference ordain that non-aleoholic
wine be used in the sacrament of the
Lords supper; that juvenile Temper
ance societies be organized in all the
congregations, and that day be set
apart in each year, known as Temper
ance Sunday, which should be entirely
devoted to Temperance questions.
The Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1860-1888, 1886-10-01

searching the house over for the cause
of this unseemly disturbance What
he said we did not bear. 1t must have
been something severe, for Flora
blushed redder than ever, and des-
perate CLEAN came into Rogers eyes.
Fred and began to realize that we
were in something of q scrape. But
we were bound to enjoy it while we
could, and we managed with sharp
ened stick to pry up the window so
we could hear what was going on.
"What on earth does this mean,
Flora?" shouted father.
Poor Flora had buried her bushes in
her hands, and gave no answer.
Father looked from Flora to Roger
and back to Flora again, and said,
louder than before:
81 want an answer; what does all
this mean?"
"Oh, fatherr' cried Flora, 81 dom t
really know, unless the sitting-room
clock is bewitched.
Il have stopped every clock in the
house" replied her father in stentorian
tones.
hOger lace turned White ana red by
turns; but be did not attempt to say
any thing. Father turned to him:
Mr.. Pettijohn, can you tell me what
this unearthly din in my house atnear-
ly midnight meansPn
Roger had disjointed his flute, and
laid each bright silver section carefully
in its place in the ebony box which he
had himself made for it. As father
finished his question, Roger snapped
down the cover of the box and re-
torted, stifiy:
IF you allude to the duet which
Miss Flora and | have been practieing,
| must at least thank you for as much
Of your compliment as includes myself.
Ii you allude to the misfortune which
seems to have overtaken your clock,
excuse me if ! tell you that you or
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1886-02-24

The SUPPOSED SACRIFICIAL CRIME IN
Observation-Disclosures Vaughn,a negro from
Fortress Mouros, Va, is pointed TO by later
developments as the murderer Of the two
negro boys whose corpse5 were found in the
woods near Savannah, Ga, Saturday, ia
stead of John Graham, the negro luna,ic
who confessed that he had strangled the
lads to offer them IS 6. sacrifice to the Lord
The new theory is the result OF the identih-
cation of the corpses as those Of children of a
negress named Olive Beaton, with whom
Vaughn had been living The pair quarrel
ed, resulting in the disappearance Of
Vaughn and the boys on the 9th inst. He
had threatened to be terribly avenged on
the woman, and the supposition is that he
compelled the boys to go with him to the
woods, while their mother was away from
home, and then killed them as described
Vaughn has not been seen since that day.
The new theory is supported by the finding
of written labor agreement near the
corpses, which was given Vaughn by his en-
ployer, and the additional fact that the rope
about the throats which fastened the corpses
to the tree was taken from we'll on the
plantation on which Vaughn was employed.
Graham, the lunatic, has uot modified his
statement that he strangled the lads as
sacrifice. The missing sons Of John Bird,
whose bodies the corpses were at first sup.
posed to be- have not yet been found, and
there is a possibility that they fell VIC
Tins to Graham iustead OF thoss already
found, and are lying dead somewhere in the
woods.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1886-02-24
UNPRECEDENTED BARGAINS
CHILDREN'S LACE COLLARS


Childrcus irish Crochet and Hamhurs Collars
reduced trou, 81 l2c. to 2jc. each.
Childrcns Oriental Lace Colla:- reduced i'rclp
Bic. to 25c. ,-ch
Childrcn'3 Irish Point Sets Collars and Cul!s
reduced rGHi .iGc and IOc. to 81 i,c. per Set.
Childrcr's Irisi. Pcint Sets Collars and Cuffs.
rcdrce! ircm G2 -. to soc par Set.
Childrcn's Oriental Lace Collars reduced from
SOC. to 81 !:,c. each.
Chiidren's Irish Point Collars r",!nre! :rc.:r
G2 DC. aud Csc. To 5Dc each.
10 snc!, values wi'l be offered again this Year
ASTOUNDING BARGAINS ~ ,AUE&.
Blsck hand maie Guipusc Lace .r ucsd from
81 i2c. ana .lOc. t" 2oc per yard
BLACK Rand made Gupurc Lace reduced from
1tic. aud 81 ilc to 25c. per yard.
Black hand made Gupurc Lee. reduced from
T5r. ana 81 90 t. 30, per yaro.
Black Thread Lace, reduced from Gjc. 10 20c
per yard
White handmade Sialta i.,cc / and / !, inches
wide. fer trimming underwear reduced from
81 W 10 20c. pcr yard.
White hand made Malta Lace. ! and > .nchea
wide, for trimming nndorwcar. reduced from 43c.
aud JOr. TO .,.Ic. per yard
-. iurI .I.ck hand-run !:sCur;al Lace. reduced
from $3.50 /, - 80 per y;,ri.
10 inch Black han, run JiscuriGl Lace Flounc.
ia. rc:HccA ;r III $3.50 to :53 80 per yard.
Second floor: take c!cyator.)
Orders By mail should he sent Immediately.
WOODWARD {, LOTHROP
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1886-02-24
Effects of High License in Illinois.

The license is fixed, by what is known as
the Harper Law. at $500. In the city of
Chicago this law has increased the revenue
to the city from 100000 to ST 500 900, and
reduced the saloons from $500 to $500 In
HYDE Park, q suburb of Chicago. though
the population has increased, the saloons
have been reduced nearly one.half; while
income and the consequent reduction of
taxation, has been multiplied tenfod. What
is more significant is q reduction in the mum.
Der of arrests from 1895 to CTS. In Spring
field, the capital Of Illinois, the saloons have
bee> reduced SO per cent. in number, and
the revenue from them has been increased
231 per cent In Peoria the saloons have
| been reduced nearly one-half the revenue
| has been trebled These are reports from
tho larger cities. In the smaller towns simi'
| lar effects have been produced. In some Of
them no licenses are granted, and prohIbl-
tion is secured by local option. In nearly
if not quite all the others the number ol
saloons has been somewhat reduced, the
amount of revenue to the State largely in
creased, and the amount of drunkenness
and disorder notably diminished. From six
columns of reports that lie before US we take
some specimen reports ut haphazard.
Cairo, Il.-Increase of revenue fifty per
cent decrease of saloons nearly fifty per
cent decrease Of notable intemperance
thirty poI cent,
Quincy.-IEcrease of revenue nearly for
ty per cent decrease Of saloons thirty per
cent.
Toledo.-Revenuc doubled; business of
police courts diminished ninety per cent.
All the low groggeries shut up.
Vandala.-No decrease OF saloons; in-
crease of revenue sixty-six per cent; fewer
cases of drunkenness and fewer disturb.
ances.
Morris.-Saloons reduced from twenty
four to sixteen; reVenue increased from
50, 400 to SIS 5000.
We need not perhaps, continue these re'
ports. The genera! result; Is expressed by
the facts that in the State Gt large the reve
500 900 to over 81 500, 900, The number of
saloons has been reduced from l3 900 To less
than 5000, the best elements Of both parties
unite in supporting and enforcing the law,
and disregard of it apparently finds little
sanction from either the people or their ma.
| tural representatives, the courts, the sheTits,
and the iuries. Moreover, in county after
county, in the small villages, the high
license has had the riltc5 Ia close up all
liquor shops. The report from Fayette
county may be regarded as Il typical one in
this regard: in several small towns in
this county the nigh license law has practi
cally resulted 10 prohibition, there being no
one in these places willing TO pay the
required fee." In the reports before us we
do not find single town or county which
indicates uufAyorable re.ults.-Gristian
Union.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1886-02-24
DRY GOODS.
LFENT OF TEE SEASON
GRAND "MovlNG OFF" SALE


SURPLUS toALAEs, LA"ES AHn Lee
FiGiit'S
Without .aceptoiG the most Prodi sio,,, Par
gains ever offered the pso.!c of Washinrt,n ona
vicinity. The low prize gfyv2 ling in wholesale
circles induced us IL bay %. !ccir, anl We find
we have too large sto:i: 10: ;r:s sc2So. of N.
| year Consequently, :, iG"yr ths accumulation
st orCc, He have concluded Ia ce. .,c,; :uto for
mer prices. marking them ~ i:.t.rr. agGy repre-.
senting hait their ic.l value" n,,i IL most cases
less than they can b. duplic,f,,! ;s Wholesale To-
day, hence the comm. wcc'. Ssi. 6,'
THE EVENT OF 'fti& HEtEnN
We guarantee every re6ucI"., s.b,n:rtc,y bona
iide. an! - DIES n to imr::s rT"n III" public
that thcs" Goods not oil, q: 's,:r>'rahlc but
goods called Tor III eur counters ,,rry day. The
only rcasoa ;"r this unparalleled, .ac.i;itr is the
one above stated. which r.pr.f : have tuo
large I stDck 10! this season .. rhc ear and rs
we cary goods over from ,lr ). ,,,u 10 anoth-
or, they mus be disposed pi
uNkVU3li.ED CUFF, COLLAR BARGAINS.
100 Dozen Ladies 3-ply, 500 Linen Cuffs
nave hecn sold regularly at 17r., now l2h2c per
pair.
36 Dozen Ladic,' Coored Collars and Cuffs, in
choice styles, sold regularly at 2Oc. % and %
now 17c. per set.
UNRIVALLED NECK WEAR BARGAINS
Do rot miss line, every item genuine sur
prise. How can wo do it: No matter.
24 Novelties in Oriental Laco Neckwesr,
sold regularly at S5c. and 81. Now SOC. each
90 Cream Spanish Lace Fichus, sold regularly
at 81. Nov 6Sc. each.
80 Cream Spanish Lace Fichus, sold regularly
ut Sl.25. ko@ 9Oc. each.
Is hanG,ran Black Spanish Ties, 56 inches
long q inches vide, sold regularly at So. Now
50 each
! handrun Black Chantilly Lac. Ties, 56 in.
long, = -. vide, sold rceaarly at S3. Now 81
each
y" also include the following sample limos.
C"rie eariy for these; half price.
l Black Hand run spanish Lace Capc reduced
from $40 to So
! lland-run Cream Spanish Fichu, reduced
FROM SD to $6.
Hand-rnn Cream Spanish Fichu, reduced
from SS to 81
Hant-run Cream Spanish Fichu, reduced
from $40 10 ST.
UNPRECEDENTED BARGAINS
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1886-02-24
AIeyaulria Oazette.
PUBLISHED DAILY AND TRI-FEERLf BY
EDGAR SSO WDEN.
-os. 70 and ~ Prince 50
TRLJvEEkLl'

At the Ga=ette Bn'dihQ, nos. ~ ana - f71hce 81.
DAILY TRI- WEEKLY.
One ysar.........S6 90 One year...... ......S4 %
Sir months ...... , 90 Sir months.,..... m 0o
One month so Three months..... 1 ~
Ali communications should be addressed to Gazette"
Alexandria, Ia.
Persons learing the city can hare the Gazette mailed
to them, postpai!, for fifty cents a month, and the
address changed rs often as desired.
Contract advertisers miH not be aocd 10 crcsed their
space unless the ercess is paid for at transient rates,
and under no circumstances ,rU they b. allo'rsd to
adrertise other than Mcn legitimate business fh tho
space contracted for.
All transient advertisements must be paid for IN al.
rance
Rrsolutionsin IN ms.noram thanks tributes Of respect
resolutions adopted by societies persons uncsS Of
public concern, ,ciU only be printed in this paper as
advertisements.
Marriaoc and death notices must be paid for an ad-
rance.
The Gazette office is connected ,rh the Telephone Er.
change. 4dreriisemeltS orders for the paper. ne,os
or any Information or business can be sent by teSe-
phone.
Entered at the Postofce at Alexandria, Virginia, as
seconded class matter.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1886-02-24

A MEXICAN CLUB SKATES, nickel plated and
II plain; nice line OF these goods. as we'll as
the cheaper Club and Wood stock Skates in store.
Prices low. JAS. F. CARLlN SONS.
dcc1o Alexandria, Va.