New Ulm weekly review. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1878-1892, 1886-01-13
IT WAS NOT DEAR JAMES.

/ IT WAS NOT DEAR JAMES,,
Distressing Experience of seductive
Drummer on . Western Railway.
{ Ihave a. friend who is a commercial
traveller, and on his return from a trip
I he always comes up to see me, and ems
livens my existence by arecount ofhis
experiences On the road.
aWell, Charley, anything new?' said
1, as Charley tilted my best chair
against the freshly papered wall and
pulled vigorously at one of my sto-
gas.
1 ''Not mucky0 said he ssI'm sick Of
the road. Too much OF a dogs life.
I'm going to quit and settle down.
1expected this. Charley has been
going to.quit during the four years
ye.known: him, but he never quits,
and, in common with many more
drummers,. Will shake the hand
Of: many a. hotel clerk yet be-
fore he finally settles down.
/ "What's~the matter, trade dull?"
asked, as Charley mechanically looked
around for the bell button. YOU'RE
| not in a hotel, my dear fellow" and
drew forth: a. bottle and glasses from
| my cupboard;
''Well, here's luck," said Charley, as
he lifted his glass to the light. mo,
trades pretty fair, but it isn't as it
used to be. Why, when l first went
on the road there was some fun in
it. I only carried one trunk, and I
could generally get the trade to look
my samples Now carry three, and
it's the hardest kind OF work to get a
man into atsample room. You don't
know,Billy Jackson, do you? Travels
fora Chicago house. Always registers
with'a toothpick"
| replied that hadn't that pleas
ure.
Pleasure! Humph! Itwould afford
me the most unbounded pleasure to
get even with him for little trick he
played onsme the other day over in
Illinois,.
+ l was going to bingham on the
Vandalia: / got on at Casey, and the
first fellowI saw was Billy. You're
just the fellow I was looking for said
he. There's d pretty girl in the front
car. and / think you can get acquaint-
ed if you'work the thing right. I've
tried it myself, but didn't seem to
catch on
owe got qeaite reputation among
the boys, In this direction, so [ easily
swallowed all Billy said, and followed
him into the smoker. I thought it
mighty strange that girl should be
III. the.smoker, but there she was, sure
enough,. and you can bet she was a
daisy. She was seated by herself when
/ l. entered, near two gentlemen.
thought they eyed me rather more
thanwa necessary. However,, Ididn't
say word, but quietly seated myself
opposite the dame, and commenced
tactics.
After I had looked at her once or
twice she began to smile. Great
Scott said to myself, this is easier
than 1 thought for So smiled back.
This was all the girl wanted. She be-
gam to, move nearer to me. Then she
nodded her head and smiled several
times In all my experience l never
had girl act that way toward me in
such q short time, and saw there
was something wrong, although for
thelife of me Icouldn't imagine what it
was. | wasn't going to back out, how
ever, SO smiled at her again, and this
time she came over and sat down be-
side me. Then she called me her dear
tlx L
my neck.
| At this juncture one Of the gentle
men had noticed came up and ex-
i planned. He was one of the keepers in
an asylum along the road. some
where, and was in charge of the girl,
who had gone crazy over love affair.
| She imagined every fellow who took
any notice other to cher dear James.
| This was oil wanted to know, and
| started for the the door, butit wasn't
any use. The girl hung on. and got
more excited every minute.
| "In the meantime one or two of the
boys had gone through the train, and
when they came back, they brought
quite a number of interested specta-
tors. The keeper advised me to hum
or her, and did, l humored her all /
could. Every time Itried toget away
| she would get violent, and did't like
to excite her any more than l could
help, as saw that / was making nv
audince uncomfortable Such remarks
as Juliet has found his Romeo, and
the like were frequently passed around,
and | was beginning to. think it would
be great relief to meet train going
! the other way on the same track, when
we drew up at bingham.
"Then l made break and got of
! the train. The last thing heard as
the train rolled out was, Come back
to me, dear james, l haven't heard
else since. Where was Billy? Oh, he
/ got off at Tentopolis.'