The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1886-06-24

There was profound silence this Sab
bath forenoon in the parish kirk of Tod
dleben. There was special service.
The kirk was crowded. The minister
was unusually eloquent. There was
less than the usual amount OF sleepers.
The kirk door was open; the heat was
oppressive. 1t was a sultry day In
August. In the midst of this silence,
this attention, this eloquence, we'll
conditioned dorking hen of command
ing appearance came slowly in at the
kirk door, stood few seconds in the
lobby to reconnoitre, then quietly, Sc
dateiy, and like an ordinary church
goer, marched along the passage with
outstretched neck, staring first on one
side. then on the other. There was a
suppressed litter among the young
folks; the old folks looked uneasily at
the dorking, then at their pastor, but
the unconscious dorking came on. The
pastor saw the state of affairs ut
glance, and, to secure the wandering
attention of his flock, became more elo-
quent still, but it would not do; all
their attention was evidently with the
dorking. Still he kept bravely on.
Meantime Sandy Scott, sawmiller and
ruling elder, had quietly risen from his
seat at the far end of the kirk, and was
coming noiselessly along the passage
toward the hen. There was an evident
fitness of things i'll Sandy SCOTS APP
proach on this occasion; not so much
because he was ruling elder in Toddle-
ben, but because nature had consider
ately affixed his pedal extremities at
the most suitable angle for the work
he was now engaged upon. He was
the right man in the right place. His
outstretched arms and wide-spreading
feet completely filled the passage.
The dorking saw this and paused.
Then, like wary general, she looked
around. She got very excitod-she got
very red in the face; so did Sandy
Scott. The eyes of the kirk were upon
the tacticians. 1t was a trying time.
Sandy Scott advan. ID with all the eau
tion of chamois hunter. The dork-
ing executed side-long movement.
The good folks were all excitement.
The pastor did all that mortal man
could do. He saw a crisis approach
ing. He made one supreme effort to
regain the attention of his flock. With
earnest and tender words he began:
my dear friends and parishioners, to-
day especially wish to draw your at
tention more particularly to"-"Teuck
-teuck-teuck- teuck-teuckw The
dorking had flown over Sandy SCOTS
head, half way down pew, and full
tilt against Robbie Watt, the deacon,
who was sitting bolt upright sound
asleep. Robbie instantly ducked his
head, audibly exclaiming, MIGHTY me-"
The dorking finally landed in the
lap of Eppie Walker, who was too
much alarmed to lay hold of it, and
there for short time the poor thing
lay painting. jamie Thomson, the new
grocer, got up in the next seat, and on
reaching over to secure the dorking
crushed Sandy Todd's long beaver hat
as fiat as an envelope, missed the hen,
and sat down in Mrs. Middleton, the
spae-wife's, lap. There was O univer-
sal laugh. The dorking, thoroughly
startled, and clucking like a deranged
steam pillow, set off on a flight round
the kirk. Once round, down came the
main lamp; round again, down came
three of the smaller ones with crash
like an avalanche. Then, amidst per-
feet shower of broken glass and paraf-
fine, the frantic hen brought up against
the manly bosom of John Scott, the
precentor, who had risen up to avoid
stream of paraffine. The poor dork-
ing, stunned and almost exhausted,
dropped amongst the choir, and sought
refuge under their deep seats. Sandy
Scott, now seeking his opportunity,
dropped on his hands and knees and
wildly CROPPED under the seats. Just
as far as his hand could reach he
touched the tail of the dorking. Lying
fiat on his stomach he could just get a
hold. He pulled, out came handful
of feathers, Sandy dryly remarking,
@That's the tail o. her, anyway; we'll
get her DOT in bitties." Then there
arose great and pitiful "skraiche, 4"
and there, the center of great halo Of
loose and flying feathers the poor,
helpless, struggling dorking was led
captive from the sanctuary.-G. j. Co.,
IN Hamilton Advertiser.