The Irish standard., 1886-12-04
DIR. MELTER7S JOKE.
4 Little Event Descriptive of Life
in Dakota.

An Exceedingly Brilliant Physicians
Playful Device-How It Worked Upon
the Feelings of Jack Brown
A Run for Dear Life.
[Estelline ID. T.) Bell.l
It occurs to US that it is time little
event which happened in Estelline some
three years ago was written up. We refer
to the surprising adventure of DG. Meier
with Jack Brown.
Doc Melter was a slender phantom, one
Of those airy fairy gossamers, that occa-
sionally hoat out here from the East and
convince us that that region is growing eff
feter every day. Physically he was willowy
with just an Elusive hint Of sunbeam legs
His whole build was decidedly slender and
what remarked that this idea of slen-
derness was carried out even to his intel
lect, though Doc thought differently and
informed several that his mind was one of
those large two-story affairs with bay
windows Of thought bulging out around
aud wood-sheds of idea built on in several
places. He said he put great dependence
on his mind especially when thinking.
Doc came out to practice medicine. He
used to go into the drugstore sometimes
and practice pouring it from one bottle to
another for hours at a time. Occasionally
in gloomy, quiet sort of way he toyed
with patient His practice III the great
field Of medicine was certainly very sad.
No one remarked this more frequently
than did the minister during the service,
when this mortality had put on immortal
ity and the quiet of the last sleep had set
tied down and Doc went sadly out and in a
futile, undecided way made q weak at,
tempt 10 collect his bill from the heirs
Jack Brown was another style of man
The weakening influences of the East had
never touched him. Originally he came
from Washington Territory where he
early gave evidence of his force of char
acter by killing a. man. Then he tarried
in Idaho and killed two mon. He stopped
long enough in Montana to kill three men.
Coming on to Dakota he settled down
quietly, waiting for almost any thing to
turn up except a sheriff from the other
Territories.
While in many respects Doc and Jack
had but little in common, i'll one, at least.
they met on equal ground; they were both
engaged in the gay work of reducing the
labor Of shat too often overworlzed meEa,
ber OF the community, the census-taker.
10 while away the time after he had gol'
the medicine all practiced and had re.
turned from the services at the church OF
the late residence Of the deceased, Doc had
constructed an ingenious device which ran
pin up through the low counter near the
drug store stove where the waiting GUS
TONERS were in the habit Of sitting down.
He operated it by pulling string at the
other end of the store and he estimated
that he had about ten dollars worth of fun
with the thing every week. A dozen times
a day his ripping laughter would gurgls
up from among the condition powder and
rat poison and other toilet preparations
as some customer bounded ceilingward.
One day Jack Brown came in and took O.
seat Oh the fatal counter Jack said bus
little about his record. Despite the fra
ternal feeling that existed between Jack
and Doc they had never come together and
compared notes.
Without any unnecessary demonstratish
Jack was quietly taking a chew of to-
bacco when Doc sighted him. He was ex-
actly in range Of the pin and Doc grasped
the string. For moment his
wattsry ccuntenance beanaed over the
sea of corn-cure boxes and then he
settled back and pulled. Jack went
up in the best possible manner. Then
there was a wild landslide Of profanity
which caused the patent medicine bottles
on the top shelf to topple and fall. Doc
struggled up from the corner where the
tidal wave had swept him and fell through
tbe door backwards He didn't have time
down a couple of times and yelled: "Meb-
by I'm green! Mebby yer think yer can
play me fer a sucker.' Then he drew re-
volver two feet long and shot
row af hair-restorer bottles of Of
the shelf and started for the back
door. Doc was just struggling up onto his
faulty and inadequate legs, but the ap-
pearance Of Jack, who seemed to him to be
over twelve feet in height, gave him
strength. With g. wild bound be started
off with Jack in close pursuit relieving the
monotony by frequent shots from his re.
volver. Yhere were several hundred boxes
and barrels in the backyard through
which his path seemed to naturally lay
and be fell over them all. Every time he
arose Jack greeted him with salute of
lead and profanity. He announced boldly
that he was no sucker and he could prove
it, Several times the young ply sician was
nearly cut in two on clothes-lines and once
his route lay head first through an ash bar
rel. He tried in vain to convince Jack that
he knew he was no sucker, never thought
he was sucker never would think he was
g sucker. He went around the town till at
last Jack tired out and he escaped across
the prairie he did not slack his gait and
he never has returned. 1t is generally
supposed that he is going yet.
A NARROW ESCAPE,
A Ferilous Position Occupied by an Ohio
Farmer and His Horses.
[Circinnatf Times-Star.l
t'ralk about narrow escapes" said Eng-
IVi1I Hoips of f1,o Rio, EHo1,,.