The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1886-04-16
SAMANTHA REFUSING 10 he
TREATED.

''If didn't want to visit the Capitol p
Says I: '.Where the laws Of the United
States are made o.
Eyes, " says he
And told him ''thatI was very weary,
but would fain behold it. -
Wall, found the Capitol was u sight tc
behold! Why, it beat any bnildin in
Jonesvilie, or Loonstown. or Spoon Settle
ment in beauty and size and grandeur.
There hain't one that can come nigh it.
various places, and put EN- all together,
aud put several other meetin' houses on
top Of em, and they wouldn't begin to
show off with it.
And OH my land. to stand in the hall
below, and look up, and up, and see all the
colors of the rainbow, and see what kinder
curious and strange pictures there wuz
way up there i'll the sky above me Gas it
were) Why, it seemed curiouser than
any Northern lights ever see in my life,
and they stream mp dretful curious some
| times.
And as | walked through the various
lofty and magnificent halls, and realized the
size and majestic proportions of the
buildin, I wondered to myself that small
law, a little unjust law, could ever be
passed in such magnificent place
Says to myself, ''It can't be the fault of
the place, anyway They have got chance
for their souls to soar if they want to =
Thinks 'es /, here is room and to spare, to
pass bylaws big as elephants and eamels.
And wondered to myselftha they should
ever try to pass laws and resolutions as
small as muskeetcrs and mats Think'es l.
| wonder them little laws don't get 10
atrollin' ronnd and get lost in the magnif-
cent corridors. But I consoled myself a
thinkin' that it wouldn't be no great loss if
they did
But right here, as | was thinkin on
these deep and lofty subjects the hired man
spoke up, and says he
You look fatigucd NOM, (Soarin'
even to Yourself, is tuekerin ''You loel:
very fatisued; won't you take something ?"
looked at him with curious. silent sort
of look; for didn't know what he meant
Again he looked close at me. and sort q
pityin'; and says he, ''Yon look tired out,
NON. Won't You take something =
Says |, WHAT"
Says he 'I4ct me treat you to some
thing What will you take, nom -
Wall | thought he was actin dretfu
liberal: but knew they had strange ways
there i'll Washington, anyway. And
didn't know but it was their way to make
some presents 10 every women who come
there; and didn't want to be odd and act
awkward, and out of style; so | says:
81 don't want to take anything, and
don't see any reason why you should insist
on it. Bat if have got to take somcthin'.
| had just as lives have a few yards Of
faetory-elot as anything
thought. If lie was determined to treat
me, to show his good feelin's toward me,
would get somethin useful and that would
do me some good, else what would be the
use Of bein treated And thought. il
had got to take present from strange
man, would make shirt for Josiah out
of it, l thought that would make it all
right, so far as goodness went.
But says he, q mean beer. or wine, or
liquor of some kind
! Jest riz right in my shoes aud my dig
nifty, and glared at him.
Says he, There is saloon right here
handy in the buildin'' =
Says |, in awful axcnts, 1T is very APP
propriate to have it right here handy"
Says I, Liquor does more toward maxim
the laws of the United States, from caucus
to convention, than anything else does, and
it is highly proper to have some liquor here
handy, so they can soak the laws in il
RICH. of, before they lay 'em onto the peo-
pie. 1t is highly appropriate, says l.
Yes, says he, 1T is very handy for
the Senator's And let me get you
glass.
No you WON'T says l firmly mo,
you won't. The nation suffers enough
from that room now, without havu' Josiah
Aliens wife let in
Says he (is friendship for Bub Smith
maxim him anxious and sol on helpin' me.
III you have any feeling of dclicacy in
going in there let me make some wine
here will get glass of water, and make
you some pure grape wine, or French
brandy, or corn or rye whiskey. ! have all
the drugs right here" And he took out
a little box ont Of his pocket My father
is an importer Of rare old wines, and
know Just how it is done. have EN- all
Capsicum, coeulus Indicus, alum,
copperas. stlychnine. | will make some of
the choicest and purost imported liquors we
the have in the country, in five Minutes if
you say 50.
''No, says firmly. When want to
follow mp Cleopatra 5 fashions, commit sui
eide. am goin' TO hire rattlcsnal,e, and
take my poison as she did, on The out
side"
Cleopatra ?" says he inquiringly. is
She Washington LADY,
And says guanledly, She has lots Of
relations here ] believe"
/ "Wall, ;" he said. she thought her name
sounded familiar. Then, | can't do any
! tbino fn, Won y, bn GAYS