The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1886-03-04

fEOPLE VINO Wcor P0PpoI- ouQ-bdlt
suits are always in season.
THERE is an experienced thresher TO
be found in every school Of whales.
A CLOSE call-let me look at one of
your ready-made suits. Boston Cour-
MUTTON CHOPS, properly cooked, are
delicious; and then mutton is always
sheep.
"THE dearest pot unearth to me-"
sang the man when he opened on
aces"
A BUFFALO cobbler calls his trade
"Open Confession" because it is good
for the sole.
The man who pounds the bar to at
tract the attent,on Of the saloonist is
spirit rapper.-Buta.0 World.
ScAMPs, as q rule, always scamper,
when danger draweth nigh. For as w.
Shakespeare observes, "A guilty con-
science makes towards of us ali"
Your bluff old chap, that boasts of
always doing things @by the card, is
very apt to perform his gambols with q
sort of an antelope - YOnkers Gazette.
"How CAN ascertain the weight of
the earth?' asks correspondent. First
time you get chance, weigh It. That's
the only weigh we know of.-Marerick.
EITHER Millionaire or Lunatio'
is q headline in an exchange. AS soon
as we get time we shall take an invoice
and ascertain which class we belong to.
Maverick.
PHLIT says sometimes he is orna-
mented with wood-cuts and sometimes
with steel-plates, just as his mother
happens to get shingle or shovel
Merchant Trareler.
with population of about 30O,-
900, 900, China has not single insane
asylum" says an exhange. Exactly,
but, my dear brother, you should re-
member that China hasn't single book
agent either. -Newmdn Independent.
Tue moon shone softly down on them.
And life seemed more than words could utter.
He said: We'll live on love. my GEM"
She said she wanted bread and butter.
Merchant Traveller.
PUFF in the paper will cause one delight.
For IL maketn the world ssem fair
But puff in the face from Il dirty old pipe
Is enough to make man swear.
-GoodatPs Sun.
THE youthful pitchers goodnight:
II you're waking, cal me early, call me early.
mother dear,
For I'm to pitch In the Jackson Nine In the big
gest game Of the year:
We licked the High School follows last week.
and now we claim
We can knock the stuffing out OF them In a con-
solution game.
brooklyn Times
Rev. Mr.. BEEcHER saws that ~as q
rule, the good and the bad die about
alike, and go out of this life through a
gate which has oiled hinges" But 1t
would be more comforting to our
wicked contemporaries" to be assured
that the good and the bad alike enter
the other life through gate which has
oiled hinges.-,NorristOWn Herald.
THE MAIDEN's FAREWELL.
The time has come and we must part
I The tearoroP dims mine eye.
How oft I've clasped thee tony heart
With1oy in days gone by
When first saw thee was sure
Thou came st To me to stay,
But notniDg earthly doth endure
All Things must pass away.
How oft in days forever past
My form thou hast embracedi
Another takes thy place at last
And clasps me round the waist.
But such Is life-we meet to part.
In midst OF change we dwell
1clasp another to my breast
Old corset fare thee well.
Boston Courier
an Thibet the women do all the hard
work, leaving the men 20 do the visiting
and gossiping." We shouldn't think
tie women of Thibet had sufficiently
robust constitutions to lounge around
the saloons eighteen hours out of
twenty-four, discussing affairs of state,
and inventing schemes to boom bust
ness and dsentangle foreign complica-
tons. -Norristotcn Herald.