Savannah morning news. [volume] (Savannah) 1868-1887, 1886-03-21
BRIGHT BITS.

A LITTLE HOLIDAY. Fellow tow nsman ito
manufacturer. Huliow, Jackscrew Your
works closed? How's that2 l understood you
were busy.
Jackscrew tbrass-founder): SO we are; but
our ands took 'emselves of to-day, to join the
procession o. the unemployed.-Pu
A Cyclone COOK BOOK" is advertised. It
10 queer idea. It would take a pretty hot
hre to cook cyclone: and then the stuff would
not be III to eat. When q quick tempered
man returns home and fnds dinner half an
hour late, he raises enough cyclone in the
house without having a cook book of that de-
nomination in the kitchen. -Norristoe0R
Herdkd.
PBoFEssoR-To contract is to make smaller;
20 expand Is 10 enlarge. Cold contracts, heat
expands. The operations cannot 20 on at the
same time in the same thing. II
Pupll-Beg pardon, Professor. There are
some things the more you contract the more
''Ah, indeed! Name some of them"
debts, sir" -PbtSadslDbia CAL.
THE excited condition of Congressman Will
lis, of Kentucky, on the subject of the n
million bill, reminds one of the postscript
which David COpperlield wrote in his letter
to Peggotty. II ran as follows: "P. S.-He
says he particularly wants you to know,
Barkis is willing" What the Kentucky mem
Der IS having telegraDhed all over the country
is: He particularly wants you to know,
Willis is barking. Boston AdUeytiSer.
SPRINGS sHYNEss.-
That March Will bring touch of Spring
There is no indication,
Jack Frost, the knave will not behave,
He steals her blooms and rich perfumes
In reckless depreciation,
And that is why
She fingers nigh
In maiden hesitation.
-PutS6Urg Commercial Gdsette.
CHANCES MATERIALLY LEssENED.-''Mrs
Dusenberry!'
"Well my dear?"
where's the bureau?"
~ had it taken to the fourth floor"
ped my collar button"
"Well. why don't you hunt for it,"
"Hnnt for it! That's encouraging. isn't it,
when you've removed the only place where
there'd be any possibility of my finding itP"N
Phil0delDhiG CAL.
A POSSIBLE REASON why Mr. Evarts' ora
tory does not make a greater impression on
the country Is given by a Western New orEer
lie had atteu ded meeting at the Cooper In
stltute, where the great man spoke. Drop
ping into store in the neighborhOod he OBJ
served that he had been over q the Institute
hearing speech. who Is speaking?" asked
the stOrekeeper.
mir. EYarts."
"Ah! And what is he talking about?"
"Weil, l dunno, he didn't say. "-Br0okI1n
Edgge.
FANCY BALLS are not ALWAYS soothing to the
vanity OF the participatOrs, The chaste Diana
at recent 'bal costume, " with culver full
OF arrows slung across her shoulders, which
were half concealed by a eOpard's skin, and
wreath of roses on her fair brow. was, oddly
enough, mistaken for Cupid! and a lady,
glowing with enthusiasm, applauded raptur-
ously her friends costume. "HOw magnifi-
cent you are as the Queen Of Shebag" Queen
Of She1a" exclaimed the friend with alarm
and Indignation, Il am a vestal virgin. "-E1-
Change.
THE SCENE is one of extraordinary interest
to watch a railroad train creeping around
through these snow -banss s, part of the time
visible and part of the time buried in the cuts
80 and 60 feet below the surface Of the snow
A more unpleasant and chilly scene could not
be described were 1t in the Arctic regions. 1t
is impossible to tunnel through the slides, as
there would be considerable danger to trains
when the snow began melting away in the
spring. The Animus canon is wild and dan
gerOus enough in the summer time. without
having to contend with the horrifying ava
lanche IN the winter. -DenBer Tribune