davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23
Insurance License.
EXECUTIVE DEPARTMENT,

ENECUTIVE DEPAKTMENT, J
OFFICE OF COMPTROLLER GENERAL,
COLUMBIA, S. c., Dec. s, 1856. }
4 certify, that j. II. Loryea, of st. Mat
l. thcwS, agent of the MERCANTILE
INSURANCE COMPANY, incorporated
by the State of ---, has complied
with the acquisitions Of the Act of the Gen.
cral Assembly entitled can Act to regu-
late the Agencies of Insurance Companies
not incorporated in the State of South Car
olina," and hereby license the said j. II.
Loryca, agent aforesaid, to take risks and
transact all business of Insurance in this
State, in the County of Orangeburg, for
and in behalf Of said Company. Expires
March 31st, 1887. w. +. STONEY,
Dec 1G- Comptroller General.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23

TIE House of Representatives last
week voted down the Canal Bill by a
decisive majority. 1t seems to us that
the State has spent too much money
on this work to abandon it now. and
we think it would have been better to
have continued the work to compile
ton. We hope the city of Columbia
will now take hold Of it and push it
through.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23

AN APPROPRIATION of $4,000 has
been made for the Citadel Academy by
the Legislature. We hold the same
view in reference to this institution that
we do in reference to the South Caro-
lima College. The money thus appro-
priated would DO the people more good
if applied to the common schools of the
State.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23
NN1icH OF Dismissal

NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN
~ that on the 10th day of January, A..
d., 1887, l will file my final account as Ad-
minlstratrix of the Estate Of Patsey Shoe
maker, deceased, with the Judge Of Pro-
bate of Orangeburg County and ask for
letters Of dismissal.
JANE T.. uUNGERPELLER
Dec IT, Administrators.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23
DrODDctl Dead.

NEWBERRY. December 1I.--IIon
Montgomery Moses, OF this place, drop
ped dead Oh the street to-day between 1
and , o'clock us he was returning to his
home from the postoiice. He had been
in his usual health and it is supposed
he died of heart disease. His death was
sudden and unexpected. He was a
Circuit j Judgc under the Radical regime
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23
The Experimental Stations.

The Legislature has made an appro-
priation of $4,000 for the establish
ment OF two experimental stations, one
in the lower part Of the State and one
in the Piedmont section. The News
and Courier thinks this is Il wise thing
to do, as "a single station could not pos
sibly cover by its experiments the vary
ing agricultural conditions in State
which embraces so great a diversity of
soil and products as is to be found in
South Carolina, with mountains on one
border and the ocean on another. Such
station, therefore, would have been
almost limited in its usefulness to the
farmers in the middle country where it
would have been placed, and would
havealeft the Piedmont region and the
low-country alike out in the cold.
Under the present arrangement the
peculiar needs of these two extreme
sections will be fully covered, and the
intermediate section will be divided
between the stations and be represent
ed and cared for accordingly. Upon
grounds Of policy, also, the establish
mcnt of two stations, instead of one, is
highly to be commended. No room is
left for jealousies, or complaints of
neglect on the part Of the farmers of
any section, and the stations will re-
ceive the more liberal and cordial aid
Oh this account. In addition to these
several considerations, moreover, it
may be confidently expected that a
natural and generous rivalry will he de-
velOped between the stations to accom-
plish the best results ut the least eX-
pense: and each station will in this way,
constitute an important balance and
check and incentive to the other. The
whole scheme is full of promise of good
to the farmerS-anG Of course to the
State-and we hope that it will receive
the earnest support of every intelligent
citizen in South Carolina"
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23

II Is WITH pleasure that we an
nounce that the Rev. S. b. Jones, ID. d.,
has declined the Presidency Of Trinity
College, to which he was unanimously
elected last week. Dr. Jones is one of
the most distinguished members of the
South Carolina Conference, and his de-
parture from us would have been a
great loss to that body us well rs the
whole State.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23
Estate Notice.

4 LLPERSOwS HAVING CLAIMS
~ against the Estate of Ephraim Cum
mings, deceased, will present the same
properly attested, and those indebted to
said Estate will make payment to the un-
dersigned on or before the 18th day Of jan
nary, A. D., 1887. JAS. F. lZLAR,
Dec 16- Qualified Executor
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23
Falling Forty Feet into Il River.

Rock HILL, December 21.-This
morning Bill Stewart, colored, Il work.
man on the new iron bridge of the
Charlotte, Columbia and Augusta Rail
road across Catawba River, between
this place and Fort Mill, accidentally
fell from the bridge, Il distance of forty
feet, into the river and was drowned
His body has not yet been found. but
the river is being dragged.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23
AIS13l1e Notice.

A LLPERSONSHA HAVING CLAIMS
N. against the Estate of Donald e. Ash,
deceased, will present the same properly
attested, and those indebted to said Estate
VIII make payment to the undersigned on
or before the 18th day of January, A. D.,
1887. W. S. ASH,
r. ?. ASH,
Dec 16- Qualified Administrators.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23
Estate NOtiCe.

A Ill PERSONS HAVING CLAIMS
IN against the Estate OF Patsey Shoe
maker, deceased, will present the same
properly attested, and those indebted to
said Estate will make payment to the un.
dersigned OIL OF before the 18th day Of JAN
uary, A. d., 1887. ..
JANE G. C.HUNGERPELLER,
Dec 16- Administrative.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23
Suicide at Bcnncttsyille,

BENNETTSy1LLE, December 17.-Joel
AdAms, prosperous farmer of Adams
Vile Township, shot himself through
the head about 5 o'clock this morning,
causing instant death. 1t is supposed
to be case Of suicide.-News and
Courier.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23
1ISf.lTr Sale.

pY VIRTUE OF AN ORDER OF
l) the Probate Court, in aud for the
County of Orangeburg the undersigned
will sell at public auction on Tueseay, the
11th day Of January, A. D., 1886, at the
residence, of the late Donald G. Ash, all
the personal property of his estate, consist
ing of Horses, Cattle, Hogs, Wagons,
Buggy, Corn Fodder, Cotton Seed, Carpen-
ters' Tools, Farming Implements, &C., &C.,
&C. Sale to begin at II o'clock A. NJ.
Terms-CASH. w. S. ASH,
r. p. ASH,
Dec 1G-2 Qualified Administrators.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23

TEXAS must abound in colossal liars.
It now appears that the story recently
published from that State about train
being robbed, on which a number Of
United States soldiers were riding, is Il
lie out of the whole cloth.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23

We will issue paper as usual next
week. We cannot afford to suspend
THE TIMES AND DEMOCRAT even for
Christmas.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23

THE SENATE in postponing the bill
to reorganlze the State Agricultural
Department until next session only
lodged the issue. 1t would have been
ssmuch more manly in that body to
have either passed the bill or killed it
outright. In our Judgment the De-
partment should be reorganiZed.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23

BISHOP J. C. CRANBERRY, who pre-
sided with so much firmness and dig
nifty over the deliberations Of the Con-
ference recently in session in our town
made a fine impression on our people
He impressed them as gentleman OF
eminent piety and marked ability.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23
For Sale.
HOUSE

A NICE DWELLING HOUSE
~ and outbuildings, with farm of fifty
three (53) acres attached, on the old Char
lesion Road, one and half miles from Or
angeburg. For further particulars apply
to WIN. F. ROBINSON.
Dec 16-4*
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23

FROM THE fact that the publisher
of Miss Rose Cleveland's late novel,
"The Long Run" has made a PROPOSE
tion to trade us fifteen copies of the
book for advertising space, we would
infer that the book itself is having q
"ShCrt run"
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23

THE appropriation of $4,000 by the
Legislature for the completion Of the
State House was the proper thing for
that body to do. We hope the work
will GO on until we have Il State House
worthy of our grand old Common
wealth.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23

WEDo NoTbelieve in women preach
ers. TO our way of thinking they are
out of place. 1t may be an old-fash-
ioned notion of ours, but we believe
that women were intended to preach
around the hearthstones and not in
public halls and churches.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23

The Legislature will adjourn sine
die tomorrow. The members have
worked hard, and deserve the thanks
of their constituents for what they
have done as well as for what they
have left undOne,
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23
EXECUTIVE DEPARTMENT,

EXECUTIVE DEPARTMENT,
OFFICE OF COMPTROLLER GENERAL,
COLUMBIA, S. G., Dec 90, 1886. }
The General Assembly having, by Joint
Resolution, extended the time for the col.
lection Of taxes to January 18th, 1887
County Treasurers are hereby instructed tC
keep their books open and to collect all
takes without penalty until that date.
W. E. STONEI,
Dec 23-2 Comptroller General.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23
Notice 10 Taxpayers.
TREASURER's OFFICE.

TREAsURER's OFFICE, !
S ORAEeEBURe Co., S. c., Dec. 81, 1886. !
EDITOR TINES AND DEMOCRAT
The following notice from the Comptrol.
ler General will explain itself. My Office
is now open for collection of Taxes.
j. S. ALCERGOTTI,
County Treasurer.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23
Assessment Notice,
OFFICE OF COUNTY AUDITOR,
0pASf.rpupc ('pT-STy
OIEHNNEBIItN NUINI1,
AN.nL.nI.nr y q My. 20 1881;


OKAEGEDUEG S. G., Nov. 80. 1886.
NOTICE Is HEREBY GIVEN
~ that will be at the following named
places on the days specified for the purpose
of taking returns for the fiscal year lSS,j-SI.
All Personal Property must he returned,
and all changes or transfers noted.
Office from 9 y. VI. to = p. NJ:
Rowcsvllc, Saturday, January |, 1887.
j. II. Feldcr's, Monday, January 5,
5 =. Wells, Tuesday, January i, 1887.
d. j. Ayingcrs, Wednesday, January ),
1887.
W. j. Snidrr's, Thursday, January g. 81.
J. \. VI. llaiglcr'S, Friday, January :,
1887.
j. VI. Moss Mill, Saturday, January 3
1851.
Knots Mill, Monday, January 10, 1887.
Fort Muttr, Tuesday, January II, 1887.
Il. Matthews, Wednesday, january -,
1897.
Zciglcr's, Thursday. January Is, 1887.
Connor's Store, Friday, january II, 81.
Ayers Shop, Saturday, JANUARY II, 1887.
Jno. L. WiIlianson'$. Monday, January,
l., 1851
K. 5. Glcaton'S, Tuesday, January IS.
1851.
VI, II. 'i'dton >, W cullcSual, Jdiltall ~,
1857.
W. Sawycr's Store, Thursday, January 20,
1887.
Col. d. livingston's Mill, Friday, JAN
uary Il, 1887.
W. +. Phillips. Saturday, JANUARY -, 81.
Branclvillc, Monday, JANUARY "a, 1897.
E;tstcrlin's Mill. Tuesday, JANUARY %,
1857.
}. d. Slnoak's, "Wednesday, January %,
1887.
Jacob Smoak'S, Thursday, January 27,
1857.
,Jamison'S Friday, january IS, 1887.
Orangrburg Court House from january
10Th to February 10Th, 1887.
j. i. LIVINGSTON,
Dee p County Auditor O. G..
Notice Of Dismissal.
NN TIE lth DAY OFJANUARY.
" \. d., 1857, we will file our final ac-
count with the Judge Of Probate for Or
angc6urg County, as Administrators of the
Estate of James p. Miller, deceased, and
ask for Letters of Dismissal.
HAYS A. SALLET,
LULA A. MILLER.
Decg Qualified Executors.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23
For Sale.

NNE Is HORSE POWER AMES
~ ENGINE AND BOILER. A bar
gain can be had for same by applying to
P.F. CRAWLING,
Nov 1S-3mos Orangeburg, S, G.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23
Notice.

TNHE UNDERSIGNED HEREBY
Il forbid all persons hunting, fishing or
in any way trespassing upon their hands.
All violations of this notice will be prose.
cuted to the full extent of the law.
F. D. BATES,
Dec. 1G-3t,.s NJ. A. PEMBERTON.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23

GEN. MCCLELLAN'S book has been
published. 1t is his own defence Of his
military career in Ike late war 1t is
making Il great racli"S throughout the
North. AS far us we have noticed the
Republican papers have only words Of
condemnation. In defending himself
Mcclellan, who was i Democrat, criti-
cises severely the COURSE Of Stanton,
the most malignant and dcpravcd poll
tician yet born in America.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23

The TINES AND DEMOCRAT and the
Weekly News and Courier only $3.50.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1886-12-23

TIE BILL pending i'll the Legislature
which provides for uniform system
of text books il the public schools of
the State ought to be killed. The bill
is not only unwiSr, unjust and imprac-
ticablc, but it smell; Of corruption and
jobbery. 1t might do well enough to
have uniformity in the books used in 4
county, but what might suit one coun-
ty would not suit another, and to cover
the whole territory of the State would
do great injury to the educational i'll
terest.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

"Well, lett 60 to bed, boys" said
the spokesman of the three belated
passengers in the smoking saloon,
throwing away his cigar Eve can't
get "A drink, and we may as well 60 to
sleep. We'll be in Illinois in the
morning"
"Don' be in a hurry, gentlemen"
said the porter, "taint very late yet.
AS | said, it's gin de rules to sell
whiskey on dis cab in dc State of
Iowy. But | don't mind tellin' yo'
dat dere's a picchaw O. de 'stillery
where dat angel likker O. ours is made
hangin' up in de state-room. Dis is
de key to de stato-room, an if you
gentlemen want to 60 in ter inspeck
dat work O. art guess hain't got no
jections. Hits worth JUS fifty cents
piece all 'roun' to See dat wonder
ful work o art. Thanks, sah-thanks
you'll find decantah- thanks,
sah-you'll find decantah behind de
picchaw, an bottle o seltzer fo' de
side down in co'nah O. de room.
Right this way gents-allus like to
encourage folks what has a taste fo'
aht, but we can't sell no whisky-it's
gin de rules, yo know-'gin de rules.
Chicago Herald.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14
A Partial Judge.

A man applied to the Governor of
Dakota for u pardon for man then
serving a term in the penitentiary.
"On what grounds do you ask for a
pardon ?" inquired the Governor.
"That the Judge who sentenced him
was prejudiced."
THAT is hardly probable"
But | can prove it,"
"Well, 60 ahead"
"The man had once traded horses
with the judge, who wanted very
gentle horse. He highly recommend
ed the animal, and said he could
warrant it not to kick. The next
morning the Judge went out and found
it dead"
"Yes, sec."
"The Judge told the man about it
and he went over and looked at the
horse, and then he tickled its hind legs
with straw and turned and said
We'll, / calculate that hoss is just
as gentle as | said he was still
claim he won't kick fly. Just bring
your children right out and let 'em
play with him, Judge The judge
chased him out of the barn with a
four tined pitch-fork, but didn't catch
him. Shortly after he got a whack at
him on trial and sent him up"
"Well," said the Governor, 81
think he must have been prejudiced--
I'll write out a pardon for your man"
--Estelline Bell.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14
Educating the Popular Taste.

There's no use O. yer talkin', gen
tlemen," said the porter on hotel
car out in Iowa, "yo' cant git any
drinks in this car, not s'long as hits
in the State Of Iowy. Gin the rules,
gemmen, gin the rules. Sorry,
cause we've got some O. the best
whiskey ole Kentucky ever turned
out, right in the state-room there, but
it's gin the rules, gentlemen, it's gin
the rules"
"Oh, WE'LL" replied the trio of
thirsty passengers, 1--WE wanted a
drink pretty bad, but | guess we'll
have to go without this time"
awful sorry, gentlemen, but it's
'gin the rules, yo' know, in the State
Of Iowy. Like to ycommodate yo'
cause dat whisky'd make yo' sleep
like lambs and dream O. Heaven an
de angels. Like to give yo' taste Of
it JUS to show you how good dot lik.
ker is, but it's gin de rules, gentle
men-it's gin de rules"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14
How Rich Lover Won the Girl who
Had Tilted Him.

a tall man with a somber look on
his face entered Major Mackelvane's
private office, and stammered:
"Major, | have most unpleasant
tidings to communicate; try and nerve
yourself?"
"What is it? My house on fire p
mo, Major, worse, far worse. Your
daughter-my dear sir, prepare your
self-your daughter has brought dis
grace on your proud house by eloping
with the gardner"
"She has, ell? Take cigar with
me-I'm going to have n holiday.
That gardner she refused three weeks
ago when he was an honored guest,
worth eight hundred thousand dollars,
so he disguised himselfwi hoe and
a straw hat, and inside of two hours
she asked him to elope with her. |
desire to say hurrah. st. Louis
Whip.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14
Not Very Flattering.

First Dudc-Ole fellah, what do
you think of Miss Commonsense
Second Dude-Well, ma deah boy,
my opinion of her is not vewy fwat-
twing.
First Dude-Thath bad. Watts
the weason you don't wike her?
Second Dude-Too deuced sahcas-
tic, don't yc know. wy, the other
day we were out widing, she and l,
and we passed by one of these dom
keys, a miswable animal, you unner-
stan, and / asked her the difference
between that beast and myself. l
thwought she would say she didn't
know, and / would tell her that the
donkey dwew loads and l dwew pic
lures. Ye know / am a sowt of an
abtist, and that would be a fwine
joke, bah Jove.
First Dude-And what did she
say?
Second Dudc-Shc said the onwi
difwncc she could see was in the
length of the ears.-Detroit Free
Press.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14
It Didn't Distress Her.

Once when the wife of Henry Clay
was chaperoning young lady from
Boston, at party given by one of
his associates in the Cabinet, they
passed through the card room, where
Mr.. Clay and other gentlemen were
playing whist. The young lady, in
her Puritan simplicity, inquired:
"Is card playing a common practice
here ?"
"Yes," replied Mrs. Clay, "the gen.
tlemen always play when they get to-
gether."
"Don't it distress you," said the
Boston maiden, "to have Mr.. Clay
gamble?"
"Oh dear, no." composedly replied
the statesman's wife, "he most always
wins"
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

The Indian chief Gall, who assist
ed in the Custer massacre, has taken
some of the survivors over the field
and explained to them how it was
done. The red gentleman appears to
be appropriately named.-The Hat
chet.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

Watering place girls-those Oh
their ninth annual summer resort
tour, and still unmarried-are very
fond of witnessing match games.-
New Orleans Picayune.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

Customer (entering unexpectedly:
$50, sir, I've caught you putting
water in the milk"
Milkman: "Yes-er-no.tha is, sir,
I'm only washing it. You don't
'spose I'm going to serve my custom
ers with dirty milk, do you ?"-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

Seaside observers say the dude is
Just as fresh when he comes out Of
salt water as if he had never gone
into it. There are some persons who
expect that salt water is cure for
everything, They are unreasonable.
Boston Courier.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

81 will flea the place" remarked
the strange dog, as he prepared to
make his home with a farmer.-Mer-
chant Traveller.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

An undertaken in London has
struck out an original line in an
nouncing his funerals in the following
terms: "Why live and be miserable
when you can be buried for e9 1852
-Ex
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

"Why don't our young men come
to the 'front.'" asks the Advocate.
Well, we don't know what keeps them
back unless it is the high price of the
reserved seats.-Burdette.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

A new soprano has appeared in
Paris who bears the name of Marina !;
and an excellent name it is-eminent-
ly suggestive of the high Cs.-Min-
nesota Tribune.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

Educated tramps are rare. They
always say: 81 seen some wood"
They never put it, 81 saw some wood" "
-Ex.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

An appropriate dress for the ex-
hausted-pants.- Rambler.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

Julia, you sat up with young
Adolphus till nearly twelve last night. !"
Eyes, mamma" at was quite chill
ly. Weren't you cold ?" "No, man.
ma" "Was there any fire in the
ROOM "A mere spark, mamma" I"
Rambler.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

"What power will the Prohibition
lists exert in the coming political CAM
paign ?" asks an exchange. Well, if
they are true to their principles, it
will be a water power.-Norristown
Herald.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

"This is very healthy place." OBJ
served a boarding mistress. "Yes-
for Chickens" said boarder, 81 have
been here two years and haven't seen
a dead one yet" She took the hint.
IT,
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

1t is no reflection upon yacht to
accuse her of beating.-Albany Ar
gus.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

1t is said that the colored people of
the United States maintain more Sc
cret and benevolent societies than any
other people ON the face of the globe.
There would seem to be nothing re-
markable about that, however, for it
is natural for colored people to keep
dark. Boston Post.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

Mrs. Slimdiet: "What is that COM
plant you are making"
Thin boarder: II say that my
napkin is so damp that it is no use at
ALL"
Mrs. slimdiet damp, eh?-
Guess you must have rubbed it
against your board BILL"
Thin boarder: "My board bill ?"
eyes; that's all over due, you
know. ."-Philadelphia Call.
Alpena weekly argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1871-1893, 1886-07-14

Horace, why don't you sit down ?
You've been standing there for over
an hour"
"Cawn't sit down, Fweddie. Going
to the reception, you know"
"Well, what of that? It's early
yet"
"Just had my trowsers cweased,
Fweddie. Do you think I've s-s-soft-
ening Of the bwain ?"-Life.