davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-12-23
THE WAGES REMARKS.

BrOthers-in arms-twln boys.
Jones swears that his girl is a social
list, or at least Anna kissed.
It is the sduck bonnet" that makes
young girls head swim.
One beyond the pale of society might
as well kick the bucket socially.
A red-headed girl does not seem to
carrot-au how much fun they make of
her.
''I passed some queer and here am
in prison on accounterfeit," he sigh
ed
According to the boycotted lover there
is no more practical freebooter than the
stern husband.
New maxim for cautious minds. Strike
while the iron is hot, but let some other
fellow hold the iron.
A tramp who used to write poetry has
Joined the Russian army. He will no
doubt bum bard the enemy.
Four sportsman; who have just fired
simultaneously at a rabbit and failed to
hit it: "WeI, I wonder who missed that
timer"
"What a beautiful form!'' exclaimed
Miss Titelace, the first time she saw an
eel; ''such a long thin waist, you know"
'sCan you tell me what smile is %
asked gentleman of little girl. eyes,
sir; is the whisper or a laugh"
A writer says that ''dress is woman's
great conundrum.'' But it is hoped she
will never be compelled ito give it up
Grace before meat. Young ladies who
lace themselves too tightly when dress
ing for dinner evidently prefer grace be-
fore meat.
sBy the wayr' exclaimed Smithers,
shave you two fives for a ten?" II have
responded Jobson. "Then lend me one
of them"
She: IT don't see why women shouldn't
make as good swimmers as men," He:
"But you see swimmer has to keep his
mouth shut"
Scene-seaside. Polite but absent
minded bather, to friend up to his neck
in water: "Ah, Jones, very glad to see
you! Won't you sit down.
Her favorite party. A young woman
being asked by a politician which party
she was most in favor of, replied that
she preferred a wedding party.
Gentleman (holding revolver in his
hand, addresses O trembling burglary
'sWhat do you want?" Burglar taking
iu the situation): "Time to get out!'
"Did you ever ask any one else to be
your wife?" she queried in much doubt
mo darling" he answered tenderly; i
assure you this is my maiden effort"
| The meanest man on record SO fan
lives in New York. His wife asked him
to give her pet-some animal that
would stick to her, and the next evening
he brought home leech.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-12-23
The Uses OF Straw.

From the Farm, Field and Stockman.
The value of straw is too little taken in
to account either on or off the farm. Too
many farmers seem to act on the principle
that it should be fed to cattle. This is
the least importanto of its uses. its value as
food is SO slight that cattle fed exclusively
on straw would die about as soon as when
fed on any such substance, as dead leaves,
for instance, the only use of which is to
properly distend the stomach. The feed
ing use of straw, therefore, is only IN
connection with concentrated food.
But there are other uses of the straw of
cereal grains which render it an import
ant integer in farm economy. One of
these is the covering of sheds. Another
and the most important Is its use as bed
ding for animals. Another use to which
it may be profitably used when cold and
wind are severe, is in forming an lmperYl-
Gus barrier, by filling a space foot wide
between two rough walls of sheds. These
walls may be made of any rough material,
as slabs, poles, but near enough together
to prevent the pulling out of straw.by the
animals. Thus sheds and stables may be
rendered as warm as much more costly
structures.
The use of straw is to much ignored as
a means of comfort used as bedding Tor
animals. Under sheds it should be laid
foot thick, and in the yards not less than
six inches. In stables that are regularly
cleaned it should be not less than six in
ches in thickness. Thus it will fully soak
up and hold the liquids and retain them
while spread on the land to be plowed
under. It takes no more material as bed
ding six inches in thickness than less, for
only the soiled portions need be removed.
The added value to the animal in conserV-
ing warmth is not generally estimated.
1t not only keeps animals comfortable,
put as manure straw is yaluably prin-
cipally in proportion to the liquid man
ure it has soaked up. 1t will pay to use
literally in the directions we have men
toned, and less SO as a food in winter
than is generally practiced.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-12-23

stables for farm animals, and that is the
placing of the hay-mow before Or above
the animals SO that the fodder receives
their breath with all the impure exhala-
tions of the lungs. Few stop to think
that there can be anything wrong in this.
yet there can be little doubt that the
quality and healthfulness of the hay is
greatly affected in this way.
The question of the proper ventilation
of human habitations, and especially of
school-rooms, churches and lecture-rooms.
has always been a preplexing one, and is
far from being settled now, after years
and centuries of discussion. How to ex-
pei the vitiated air and admit pure air,
without at the same time admitting q
dangerous draft has been the source of
the perplexity. We know that portion
of the emanations from lungs and skin
is lighter than the atmosphere, carburet-
ted and supplemented hydrogen, rising to
the upper part of a room or stable, and
another portion, carbonic acid gas, is
heavier, sinking to the lower part; how
shall ventilators be arranged SO as to CON
duct the Yitiated air from both the upper
and the lower levels? These questions
are much more easily asked and answer
ed. A perfect system of ventilation is
yet to be devised.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-12-23

largely upon this, the greatest product of
the United States. In the tables on page
1913 are given the tests applied to large
number of exhibits of twenty pounds
each, from different farms, localities and
States in the ''corn belt" Barely space
could be spared for the extended figures
and notes concerning the prize-taking
lots among the Dent corns and half a
dozen other good specimens. It was only
practicable for the examining committee
to take into account the points and cir
cumstances before them. Back Of these
are sundry other considerations that
could not be shown or examined in an ex
hibit of this kind, such as the soil, its
preparation fertilizers if.used, the meth
DDS of culture. distance OF rows. special
effects of unusual weather, drainage, the
yield per acre of grain and slower, nutri
tive or feeding value of the corn, ETC., all
of more or less influence and Importance
in deciding upon the best corn for any
one locality, and for different localities.
The many notes and particulars we have
received fro N the growers of tbs corn
will be interesting on several of these
points, and we shall give, from time to
time, as space allows, some of the more
important of these particulars that may
throw further light upon the subject, and
be of important practical use to corn
growers.
Long and large ears have in a majority
of exhibits been leading points cons ider
ed in the award of prizes. Are they any
guide, especially if the number of ears
on an acre be not taken into the reckon
ing? What is the best for general cult
ure, yellow, white or mixed dent? One
point was established by the committee,
so far as the specimens before them
were concerned, by an infallible test, viz;
the percentage of cob to ear. Each was
carefully weighed on accurate scales turn
ing to small fraction of an ounce. Ex-
hibit COL, for example, showed only Ii
per cent of cob, and this was almost APP
preached by numbers so and ITS. With
13 per cent of cob, seventy pounds of
ears would yield very nearly sixty-one
pounds of sheIled corn sixty and nine
tenths pounds). On the contrary, lot 1913,
with over "a per cent of cob, would yield
only about ffty-two and three-fourths
pounds of corn to seventy pounds of ears
a difference of 1879 per cent in favor Of
the former.
Again, the heaviest ears, lot sos, aver
aging nineteen and One-eighth ounces
each, had 1511a per cent of cob. Then in
some of the prizetaking samples the ears
were but six or eight inches long, and of
comparatively light grass, weight, the
other merits turning the scale in their
favor. The intelligent, investigating
reader will find very many points in the
table worthy of examination and numer-
Gus comparisons that will be both inter
esting and instructive.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-12-23
Ventilation of Stables.
Practical Farmer.

The necessity Of pure air is as urgent
for horse or a COW as for human be-
ing, and it is fact that the wants of ami
mails in this particular are quite as fire.
quently disregarded. In some respects
brute animals have the advantage; in
others human beings have. The stables
of brutes are seldom made as tight, as
exclusive Of external air, as the dwellings
of man, and they do not have such ex-
hausters of oxygen and manufacturers OF
carbonic acid gas as stoves to corrupt and
poison the atmosphere they breathe. But
then, on the other hand, they stand and
lie in their own excrements and are forced
to breathe the ammonia and other mephi-
tic gases rising therefrom. Besides this,
a horse or COW having much larger lungs
and consuming much greater volumes OF
oxygen, exhausts the vital properties OF
the atmosphere much more rapidly.
There is another consideration toe
generally disregarded, in constituting
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-12-23
FARM, HOME AND GARDEN.
THE SCHOOL MARIN.
WASHINGTON CRITIC.

O, School Marin!
Thou who teaches the young idea
How to Scoot,
And spanketh the erstwhile
Festive small boy with hand that taketh the
trick!
Who also lameth him with a hickory switch,
Ind crowneth him by laying the weigh,
OF a ruler upon his shoulders,
o.
Thou art a daisy!
Thou maketh hum the national emblem
Red, white, and blue
Thou furnisheth the strips,
And he seeth the stars.
O. School Marin,
We couldn't Go without thee,
And we don't want to try!
Thou art lovely and accomplished
Above all women and if thou art
Not married, it IS because thou art
Too smart to be caught in that way
All school marmS are women,
But all women are not school marms,
And, angels, pedagogic,
That is where thou hast the bulge oH thy sis
tiers!
O, School Marml
Taou mayest not get much pay here below,
But cheap education is a, National speciality,
And thou wilt get thy reward in Heaven;
The only drawback being that thou stayest
there
When thou goest after it, and we
Who remain here below for our reward,
Hiss you like thunder.
School Marin, If there is anything we can do for
you
Call on us!
Apply early and avoid the rush!
Office hours from a m to p. m.
We were a schoolboy once Oursef,
And can show the marks of it!
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-12-23
Care OfCOWs in Calf.
Practical Farmer.

Where the facilities for separation are
at hand, it is doubtless safest to keep the
ln-calf COWS apart from the rest; but of
course this is not always possible. Sep
ar alton, however, should not be supposed
to insure absolutely the safety of herd.
so as to make inspection unnecessary.
In all circumstances, the more carefully
a herd is watched and tended, the small
er are the chances of loss from neglect,
accident, or undetected illness.
Even if the non-breedeIs-tha is to say
the cows and heifers intended for breed
ing, not at the time pregnant-are kept
apart from the present breeders, they
should be watched, and if not running
out with the bull removed from among
their female companions during periods
of excitement. Many a sprain, many
strain, and much loss of flesh from dis
turbance, and from time taken off graz
ing, might be avoided by watchfulness,
Among the heavy breeding COWS, and
those not far gone in calf, constant sup
ervision is an important necessity. To
catch the first sign of calf casting and
Immediately separate from their fellows
those about to cast is often the only way
of preventing the evil from extending
to the whole of the breeding female por-
ton of the herd; while the notice and re-
movaI of any turning likely to cause
casting, the immediate application OF
remedies in the case of minor accidents
attention to slight lameness, and numer-
less other little details of care, go to
make the difference, very often, between
successful and unsuccessful stock-breed
ing.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-12-23
A Useless New Potato.

Some eminent botanist and practical
seed men put their heads together two
wears ago, says the st. James Gazette, to
produce new potato. Our familiar var
iety is by birth natives of the high
Andes, perhaps the very dryest region on
the earth's surface. 1t has occurred to
these scientific persons that the terrible
disease to which the root has of late
years become liable might be due to the
fact that it is extensively cultivated III
the wettest parts of Europe. Darwin,
however, discovered a wild potato in the
Chonos Archipelago. off the southeast
coast of South America, which flOurished
naturally in the wettest marshes. So
Lord Cathcart and his friends resolved
to garden the potato of commerce by
crossing it with the moisture-loving
kind. Roots were procured from Kew,
and the flowers fortified with the best
native sorts. Seeds we're thus obtained
from the Kew plants, for the first time,
and the tubers developed surprisingly
under cultivation. and proved of fair
edible quality. The plants grown from
The hybrid seed grains have just produced
afne crop, both in in quality and weight.
But slight initial error has somewhat
spoiled the experiment.. The Kew plant
turns out not to have been a wet potato
from the Chonos Archipelago at all, but
only wild variety of the commonest
kind. The men of science must try
again.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-12-23
Pulyerising the Soil in Winter.


Flowing the ground late in the season
is an excellent method of pulverizing it
and putting it in fit condition for
spring planting. But all soils are not
all alike, and hence in ORDER to deIiVe
the best results the farmer must thorough
ly understand tho character Of the soil
and make those preparations for adapt
ing it to its purposes that may be neces-
sary. The frost is the winter agent for
reducing the soil. The hardest and
toughest clods are compelled to yield to
the powerful effects of heat and cold, and
particles are reached by frost that are
beyond the most complete implements
invented by man. When the pillow throws
up the soil the rains, dews and melting
SHOWS are permitted to enter and sink
down to alower depth that when the soil
is hard and compact As the moisture
freezes it naturally expands and forces
the particles apart. AS this contraction
and expansion alternates with the chang
es of temperature the work of disintegra-
ton continues until the warm days of
spring.
Some soils are, however, injured by
fall blowing, being compacted by the
early spring rains: but such soils are usu-
ally of a heavy clayed consistency. 1t IS
in the management Of such soils that the
farmer has an opportunity to experiment
and use his skill and judgment. When
blowing in the fall the subsOl pillow
should follow in the furrow behind the
one that turns over the top soil, so as
to open the earth to as great a depth
as possible. Rut unless the
land has been underdrained
the water will have 70 escape
from below. When heavy rolling soils
are left undisturbed during winter much
of the water flows away from the surface,
but when deeply plowed it soaks in. If
it can not readily escape below the soil
becomes cold, and though the frost may
puIverize it finely, yet the heat Of the sun
will bake the surface and leave the earth
cold and wet below.
Undertaking not only permits the
passing off of the excess of moisture, but
allows the air to enter from above and
below. As the level of the water is low
cred the air follows, and the soil is not
only warmed, but chemical changes oc-
cur, the land produces larger crops, while
the work of cultivation is more easily
performed. Thus, by understanding
subsoiling, and blowing in the fall or
early winter, the soil obsorbs moisture,
air and heat, and does not bake in spring
while the frost pulverizes it to the finest
| degree.
With these preparations at the season
| the farmer is saved much valuable time
during the busy season of the year. The
stubble and sod decompose and gradual
ly become plant food, while the insects
and especially the dreaded cut-worm, are
destroyed or lessened in number. Such
| soil will also contain a greater proper
| ton of moisture during drouth, owing to
its capillary attraction and the fine con
| condition to which it is reduced. But, nc
matter what the first preparation may be
the farmer who makes good use of the
harrow in the spring will be amply re.
paid at harvest time.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-12-23
PARTING LINES.


oh, fail not thou, when far away,
In foreign chimes, you lonely stray,
To often think of me
Who, when the world has proved untrue,
More fond and faithful to thee grew,
Thy guard and guide to be.
Oh, what to me is time or space,
Save that gaze upon thy face
Nor clasp in mine thy hand.
For though an ocean tween us flows,
Our thought no check or boundary knows.
But flies DER sea and land,
Forget not all the converse sweet
l deem our life but all too fleet
For that communion dear.
I doubt thee not; know full well
That round thy soal is twined a spell
That Will not languish here.
Two wove by one whose every thought
Was for thy weakly no thing bought
But thy returning love!
And by the influence that it gives,
Enduring, writ in heavens archives
To win thy heart above.
Warm tears are eoursing down my cheek,
And thought TIE lips could never speak
Are crowaing on my brain!
have no power those tears to ouell,
For my sad spirit knows full well
We shall not meet again,
be this our ever present Joy,
That bears no stain of earth,S alloy,
For gaze of mortal eyes.
At mornings blush and ewes decline
My fervent prayer will blend with thine.
Farewell, and be it ours to greet
Each other at the Mercy seat
Earth'S sorrows ever DER;
And there, IN chimes of endless day,
With white-robed angels we shall stray,
To sunder never more.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-12-23
Ballet and Business.
Omaha World.

Mrs De Goode-O Mr.. De Blank! You
certainly don't mean to say that you at
tend the American opera in Cincinnati,
and you good member of our denomi-
nation?
Mr.. De Blank-Why, madam, was not
aware that music had been interdicted.
Emusic? Oh! that is all right of course,
but hear that the American opera has
ballet"
''Trle, had forgotten about that; but
then you know should be considered an
exception, because l am an artist"
'sAn artist? Why, thought you were IN
the iron business"
II am, but I do all the deslgnlngs for
our firm.
81 really can not understands do
you manufacture principally"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-12-23
The Usual awful Result.

Jones-You remember there were thlr-
teen at the table at dinner at my house
last night?
Brownies.
Jones-Well, young De Peyster died
this morning.
Brown-My! is that possible? [ was
Ioking for something of the kind.
: Jones-Yes; the poor fellow was talked
to death by the Boston girl who sat next
him.
The editor of the Oregon County Far
mer trains his tomatoes to poles, and
they grow six feet high.
Sunset" Cox says it is like being IN
Paradise to get back to America.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-12-23
What is the Best Corn.
Prairie Farmer

This is question of very great impor-
tance to the whole country, not only to
farmers who grow corn, but to the whole
commercial interest which depends SO
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-12-23
Chance For A Preferred Cheditor.
Macon Telegraph.

ssMine fren'," said a Georgia merchant
to drummer who used to frOiic with him,
after the former had compromised all
around at 40 cents en- the dollar and gain
ed year to wind up the business, 'I'm
goin' ter make of you er-vot you call
hierm- breyered creditor. How vas
dot?"
Thanks, old fellow, thanks! 1 knew
you wouldn't go back on me. How are
you going to arrange it?" The merchant
led hin aside.
"Ven,'' said he, closing one eye, ~ want
to tell you rite now that nobody vas go.
inter git er d-n cent out of dis b1zness.
Sand you call this making me a pre-
ferred creditor?" The drummer's eyes
could have been easily knocked out with
stick.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-12-23

Puritan Boston is now ag1tatlng Inc
subject Of prohibiting smoking on Inc
streets.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1886-12-23

Cabman: "What's the number of your
house" Inside party: "What difference
does that make to you? Ecu just drive
me home. I'm not going to enter into
any condolences with YOU"
The coming buttermaker, according to
the National Stockman, must have
clean mouth and breath as well as clean
clothes and clean apron, be honest,
smart, neat, level-headed and able to keep
accounts.
The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1886-09-18
Girls Who Lure Men to Ruin.

Gath, in Cincinnati Enquirer.
Not many years ago prominent min
lister, who afterward became Bishop,
told me at the dinner table of gentle
man, after the ladies bad retired, an in
cident equally illustrative of the perils of
New ork and of the simplicity of the
man. lie was walking through side
street not very far from his parsonage,
when he observed girl at the sidewalk
crying. She seemed to be only about II
years old, and the good paster felt moved
to inquire what might be her loss or
grief. "Oh," said the girl, Il have been
see my mother. She is poor, and none
of these rich ministers will 20 to see her
81 am a minister" said the rectot :
"where is your MOTHER lie took the
child's hand, and it hardly occurred to
him as he went along the pavement that
some individual-perhaps some police
man-noted him particularly in his care
full and almost clerical dress accompany
Irg a child evidently far beneath his own
sthtion. He went along the street, de-
scended to Third avenue and continue d
beyond it, aud the child turned into a
house. going through IA hall. The minis
ter went up one flight of stairs and the
Girl beckoned him further on. Something
he saw OF felt or had reflected caused
him to pause. He now looked at the
chiu's face again and saw different
| light i'll it from what bad appeared upon
the street. A feeling OF fear took pos
session of him and he said Il won't 90
up there without some person know to
accompany me-" The child turned, and,
running down few steps, seized him
fast and said eff yon don't give me
money II have you arrested for follow :
ing me home He saw in a moment the
situation he was in-habIe TO be paraded
in every newspaper of the town next day
for indulgences he had never conceived,
| his motives miscoustrued his family and
congregation scandalz d. At that mo
|
man come up the hall, and supposed Linn
self to be Already in the meshes of the
law. But the man spoke to him by name,
told him that he had followed him under
the belief that he was deceived, and
thereupon arrested the girl ana her
mother, who followed thai line of bust
ness and kept respectable men spotted,
SO to speak, ST. as the better to decoy
them. In one of Ford's OF Beaumont S
plays occurs this very scene, dating back
to the commencement of the seventeenth
century, where lewd family maintain a
child 80 better than themselves to be
sold to men for the purpose of involving
them with ruin or black mail