Semi-weekly south Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1883-1889, 1886-01-12
THE WIFE MARKET.
Ambiguous Phraseology Of Matri-
monial Advertisements.

monial Advertisements
Matrimonial advertisements arc be-
coming more and more common In the
country. One would suppose that they
are found TO succeed. otherwise their
number would not increase as 1t does.
1t Is not always, however. that adver-
tscments sucosod. Tho following Is an
instance OF contrary result:
''Tho middle-agol widower who ad-
vertiscd three weeks ago Is still a candi-
date for matrimony. Many letters are
missing by not giving explicit and
proper directions. How sad!--is still
a candidate for matrimony! Did he,
perhaps, confess TO "incumbrances" in
his previous advertisement or is 1t be-
cause he Is middle aged and widower
that he has not bcen appreciated in the
course Of three whole wdeksp And he
Is evidently such an unsuspocting. SIM
plo-minded. trustful man. Some men
would have thought that II no letter
came no letters had been written; but
not SO the middlo-aged widower. lie.
on the CONTRARY, is full Of faith. He Is
sure that many ladies have written;
they must have used wrong address.
Is 1t yet too late for us 10 point out 10
the fair sex how invaluable husband
with such ready explanatory theories
would be to ladies who love liberty?
The middle-aged widower does not de-
serve 10 be disappointed; but we can
scarcely hold the same view OF mid
dle-aged lady's case:
IA lady Of middle age, with no gen.
tleman acquaintance. would like 10
form an acquaintance with a gentlc-
man-from middle age to sixty-with a
view TO matrimony." Now In the first
place, does this mean that the acquaint-
anceship Is to last from middle age to
sixty, with view 10 eventual matri-
monyp That sort OF arrangement
would certainly not suit an eager vouna
fellow like the middle-aged widower
whom a delay Of even three weeks
could drive into that plaintive "'still
candidate" But further than this, the
lady makes two capital blunders, which
will probably prove fatal to her wishes.
She should have represented herself as
surrounded by troops OF ardent admir-
ors none Of whom quito come 10 her
ideal standard, and she should have
chosen some less offensive phrase than
from ''middlc age 10 sixty supposing
1t TO refer TO the ago of the gentleman,
and not to the duration Of the court
ship. That phrase will infallibly otlond
all matrimonial men Of sixty. We
should imagine that the middlo-aged
widowcr Is close upon sixty, else he
would describe himself as I'm the prime
OF life" and yet the wording Of the ad-
vertisement implies that sixty Is old. On
the other hand. men from forty TO fifty
will not allow that they are middle
aged, thoy leave that for fellows Of six
tv. Hero Is q proposal whose full beau
tics does not come out on a nero cur
sorry glance.
"A gentleman Of medium age and
good mercantile business desires the 40
quaintance Of lady. from twenty-five
10 forty years OF age, for wife His
lady acquaintance In the city, very lin
tied, Is Of retiring, modest disposi-
ton. Observe the delicacy Of the gen.
tleman OF middle age. He does not ad-
dress himself to principals, but to
friends Of principals. He wants as
wife the acquaintance OF lady from
twenty-five to forty years Of age. How
old the wished-for wife Is to be he does
not say. nor yet why hor friend should
be from twenty-five to forty years Of
age His second sentence, too, Is am
biguous; Ibis lady acquaintance In
this city, very limited, is OF a retiFingr
modest disposition" Possibly il en-
bodies complaint, and. II so, 1t Is un-
wise, for i casts ro2sction upon his
readers II amounts TO saying that he
can not get on with the retiring and
modest ladies, and so seeks for wife
among that opposite class which adver-
tises or answers advertisements.
what does 'middle-aged gentle
man mean who desires the acquaint-
anco OF poor young lady," and adds
IN parenthesis, IAN orphan preferredp"
Can it DO that he objects to the idea OF
q mother-in-lawp or IS It that there is
something wrong about him which
a natural protector could find
outF on the other hand, 1t
may DO that he Is so deficient
IN personal attractions-about which
very little IS said In these advertise
ments, and as compared with income
that pc thinks ne VIII have a better
chance with the poor and helpless"
class "A bashful young man does
not look ior an orphan. hc oonfesses
that "a pretty loot is his passion, in
connection with "naxon hair and blue
eyes, not knowing, perhaps, IN his
bashfnlness, that these three cxcellences
are rare. "a young soldier" Is not so
bashful as the ''bashful young man."