The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1886-11-20
Holding a Seat.

will you be kind enough to watch
my seat here and allow no one to get
into it while 60 into the smoking car
and take smoker asked the presump-
tuous passenger in the opposite seat of
me-
What else could l do but to answer
yes, though l had started out on pleas
ure excursion, and this mans conde-
scension quite knocked all the pleasure
out of the trip at the beginning, and
now that fatal seat lay on my mind like
my last years debts-provided had
some.
At the next station big man came
in, and, spying the only vacant seat,
pre-empted it on the spot, and proceed
ed to make himself comfortable. sat
long time considering how far my re
sponsibility went, but saw that l must
40 something, so I mildly whispered to
him that the seat belonged to another,
and he scowled and left at the next sta
ton, where some ladies got aboard. AS
last resort placed my new hat over
in the seat to preserve 1.-THE seat, not
the hat-and two of the females sat
down on the hat. They did not appear
to notice the hat, or probably thought
it was the hustle, and began to make
themselves at home. l told them as
coolly as l could that the seat was oc-
cupied. They said of course it was. l
remarked that the owners hat was un-
der them. They obliterated me with
frown and got up; the hat didn't get
up. Its get up was gone. / tried to
straighten out the hat and felt sick, SO
did the hat. l INDUCED inwardly in
some strengthy secular language, and
soon a tall ,long-haired fellow got aboard,
whose pantaloons were poked into his
boots to rest, and whose shirt yearned
towards washtub, and took the fatal
seat without paying any attention to me
waving him away.
had to do it, though I shuddered.
| walked to him and gently and politely
told him the seat belonged to another
man, when, all of sudden, he jumpet
up as if there was a tack in the seat and
gave a regular Comanche howl, as l sat
back into my seat, wishing there was
trap door through the floor of the car.
This seat belongs to another, does
it? Where is the duferl Where are
his symptoms? Nothing here. Where
are his remains, his silk umbrella, his
peanut shells, his tobacco spit, his chew
ing gum shoes, his fur-collar overcoat,
his thirty-eight caliber valise, and his
eye glass? Show me, if you please, his
assets, his liabilities, his heirs, admin
istrators or assigns! Where is his mort
gage, or his lien, or twenty years lease?
l am Cross-eyed Bill from Brazosl (and
he parenthecised the name with a cou-
pie of long horn revclvers.) Are you
the ozone, the canned fruit man who is
trying 10 preserve this seat for the COM
ing man, or the rising generation2
begged 10 prove an alibi, insanity.
or anything legal that was necessary or
would do anv=eaad-qn.l-s.~s. II
not to mention it, when in came the
former occupant and asked the stranger
shortly to get out. The stranger gol
out, and the owner of the seat began to
fall all over himself, to explore the cell
ing with his feet, to test the floor, t"
unhandle the nelghboring seats, ard
when the stranger laid him gently down
in the aisle and spread him out comfort
able to rest, and recuperate, and catch
his breath, and get his health back, and
try to feel better, and try to be easier.
and wait for a doctor, and gather his
senses, | had time to think that 1t wa
the right way for man t" be served
who will ask another to hold his seat
during his absence.